The Sacred Journey of Parenthood

By: Lisa Brenner

There is no greater transition in life than giving birth and becoming parents. This is a sacred experience for all involved: the birther, the partner and the new baby.

Throughout pregnancy, the birthing process and in the immediate postpartum time, there is much we can do to connect with ourselves, our partner and our baby to bring conscious loving awareness to our experiences.

Ayurveda and Yoga philosophy offer much guidance and wisdom to help create a calm, loving and supportive environment while navigating the emotional, physical, mental and spiritual challenges of becoming new parents. Whether you are preparing for the arrival of your first baby or second, third, or fourth, each birth is an initiation, one that needs to be acknowledged and honoured. No two pregnancies are the same, just as no two babies are the same. Each birth is an opportunity to create a conscious connection within ourselves, with our baby and with our partner, embracing the change in family dynamics.

“To mother a child is one of the most momentous and influential jobs in a

woman’s life. It is referred to as a maha-dharma or ‘great duty’, above all other dharmas in life. The dharma of motherhood includes serving as a positive role model for your children, guiding and supporting them, building confidence and compassion in them, instilling strong values and ethics, and encouraging their growth and development as individual beings.” Margo Shapiro Bachman, Yoga Mama Yoga Baby. The Charaka Samhita, an ancient Ayurvedic text, advises to treat a pregnant person with gentle attention and care. While pregnant, whatever we take in, including thoughts, emotions, experiences and foods, are transmitted to the baby, positive OR negative. How can we create and maintain more peacefulness and joy in our lives and live more harmoniously? We need only to look to the qualities of Sattva (one of the three natures of the mind),

which are clarity, alertness, compassion, balance, love and awareness. One of the primary goals in Yoga and Ayurveda is to cultivate more Sattva.

So how can we experience more Sattva within ourselves, our relationships and our surroundings? Here is a list to get you started.

Be gentle with yourself and others Always speak the truth with kindness and compassion Listen to peaceful music Read uplifting books Spend time in nature Eat wholesome, fresh food Create time for spiritual practices (like meditation) Practice Yoga and breathing exercises Write freely in a journal Have daily self-care practices Create a support system for yourself

While it is impossible to protect yourself completely from unwanted stressors, coming back to these practices allows you to be gentle with yourself, to go within and to sit in stillness.

Each moment is an opportunity. What are you choosing to focus on?

“The health of every family begins with the mother. She is the tree from which the healthy fruit must come.” - Juliette de Bairacli Levy

Preparing for birth

“Birthing is the most profound initiation to spirituality a woman can have.” - Robin Lim

“When we enter the world of birth, we step across the threshold from the mundane to the sacred. Pregnancy and birth are a space between worlds - a liminal space - a place where you are no longer not a parent and not yet one

either. This betwixt and between is sacred space within which powerful and profound events occur - often uninvited.” Transformed by Birth, by Britta Bushnell Phd.

So how does one ‘prepare’ for birth? How can you tap into the sacredness of this experience?

Begin by going within. Still the mind, flow with the breath, allow yourself to feel all of the sensations with wonder and curiosity. Remain soft and open. Trust the process.

It can be helpful to make a list of birth preferences prior to going into labour. Set some time aside during the pregnancy to sit quietly and imagine yourself in the birthing space. What does it look like and how does it feel? Who would you like to be present at the birth? How would you like the atmosphere? (Music, lighting, noise). What positions would you like to try during the birth? Are you ok with pain medication, and if so, what type and when? Writing out your preferences is a great way to keep others informed of how you would like your birth to look. A quick online search will pull up lots of templates for you to use as an example. Keep in mind that with any ‘plan’ it’s important to remain flexible. Unexpected circumstances can arise, or you may change your mind about something once you are actually in labour. That’s okay! Being flexible and going with the flow are necessary skills to have for your soon-to-be new role: a parent!

Preparing for postpartum

Ayurveda refers to the first 42 days postpartum as the Sacred Window. How a birther is cared for during these 42 days can have an impact on them for the next 42 years.

The first 42 days are a sacred and tender time. Birthers need to be surrounded with love and deep layers of support as they step into their new reality, honouring and validating this wondrous journey they have embarked upon. Birthers need to feel empowered, strong and capable; to be able to tap into their intuition with a deep knowing.

Nurturing, loving and caring for new mothers gives them the time, space and energy to tap into their inner strength so they can take care of themselves, their babies, their families and ultimately, their greater community.

Ayurveda provides us with the four Pillars of Care, which are REST, NOURISHMENT, HERBS and BODY CARE. The birther is as delicate as their new baby. They are ata crossroads and require deep rejuvenation - physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. If they are able to receive the level of care needed they will have a greater chance of thriving and coming out the other side feeling strong, empowered, calm, radiant and aligned.

So, how can you ensure that you will be wrapped in the layers of support you need so you can take the time you need to heal and transition into your new role? A postpartum plan is essential. There is so much to consider and everyone’s needs will look a little different. Taking the time to think about the help you will need or desire, talking it through with your partner, and writing it out will help you to come up with a plan that works for you and your family. I have a free planning guide available that you can download by visiting www.wiserootstherapies.com/ebook. This ebook is a great starting point. If you’d like to delve even deeper into postpartum planning, I highly recommend the Build Your Nest workbook by Kestrel Gates. She goes into great detail about all aspects of postpartum planning with a lot of great reflection questions to help you discover exactly what your particular needs are or will be. I also offer individual sessions to create a personalized plan that will work for each family. More information can be found on my website.