Family Care, Issue 39

WITH CARERS NZ | ISSUE 39

Help others, help yourself

wellbeing

just for you!

NEW ZEALAND GIFTS GALORE BE IN TO WIN!

Get your greens!

HOME SAFETY Watch yourself GRANDPARENTS Storytelling LOST ARTS Practice makes perfect COFFIN CLUBS Ultimate DIY ACUPUNCTURE Health benefits

Plus...

books, learning, care to cook, gardening, useful things, reader stories, gifts + more!

READY?

Good times await

TIME

Precious walks with Mum

Speak directly to our Continence Nurse Specialist Our Continence Nurse Specialist is now available to take your calls from 9am to 5pm, Mondays and Tuesdays.

Please give her a call with any continence questions or concerns you may have.

You can also email any questions about continence to info@continence.org.nz This is a free and confidential service and is available for all ages.

 0800 650 659  continence.org.nz This service is available from 04 July 2018 to 30 October 2018

Proudly sponsored by

22

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this issue features

14 Reader Gifts!

One entry, all draws

Complete and return our Helpingyou hands will easy entry form and be entered into every reader gift draw!

One entry per person please.

Just return your form to us and you’re in to win!

I have chosen to not write this on the computer so you may be able to read it rather than my attempt to write with a hand and arm in a plaster cast!

Family Care would be without doubt my most loved and anticipated magazine.

I cared for my late husband for many years until his death and I actually cannot remember just how I came to see my first issue of the magazine.

I am a busy person in my community and at home, but the minute I collect Family Care from the letterbox, my world stops. The kettle is put on and nothing but nothing stops me from sitting down and reading it from beginning to end. I guess it provides compulsory ‘time out’!

I find all the articles interesting and beneficial, not only for me but for those I know who have various ailments and life-restricting disabilities.

I go back over the articles more than once, cutting out some pieces for myself and to share (begrudgingly) with others who might need the information.

I live from dollar to dollar financially on my superannuation and have not paid a subscription, but to my absolute delight Family Care has continued to arrive in the letterbox.

I read your opening article regarding the never-ending costs involved and if I ‘absolutely had’ to receive Family Care by email I would make the sacrifice of my time out when it arrives to read it online.

Thank you for an extremely valuable magazine in so many ways that are practical, interesting and helpful.

I often say to myself when reading, ‘that makes so much sense, why didn’t I think of it?”.

Keep up your wonderful publication, albeit with financial sacrifices for the many for whom it is a lifesaver.

It’s also good to know others are similar to yourself.

P JOLL, WHANGANUI

SEE OUR GIFT ENTRY FORM ON PAGE 7 www.carers.net.nz

Thank you Penny, we hope your arm has healed.

Many of our readers like you would struggle to pay a subscription, we know. Since our last issue which described the challenge of continuing to print the magazine, we have received many paid subscriptions

One Entry for All Gift Draws!

Just complete and return this form and you will be entered into every draw from our latest issue! One entry per person please.

We'd love to know more about what you like.

Please tell us about yourself (tick any that apply)!    

14 18 20 22 28 32 34 38 41 44

this time!

Simon Broad

3

Reflections

Grandparents

6

Letters

Lost Arts

12

Wellbeing

24

Saturdays with Mum

47

Coffin Clubs

51

Garden guru Storytelling

Darning, mending With Katrina Sneath Precious time Ultimate DIY

Hello again Feedback!

Books + Film Our picks

Useful Things

Aids, equipment, fun stuff

Care To Cook BBQs!

Marketplace Where it’s at

Home Safety Protect yourself

Get Your Greens Delicious, nutritious

Acupuncture

For good health

She Cares

Carers NZ campaign!

I am a family carer for another/others I am a 'self carer' managing my own health and disability needs I care for a child or young person with a disability I have (or assist someone who has) these conditions or health issues:

_______________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________ I work in health and disability   I work for a community organisation  I share my magazine with others (if so, how many others see your copy of Family Care: _________ )

I would most like to win these reader gifts: 1. _____________________________________________________ 2. _____________________________________________________ 3. _____________________________________________________

Name ___________________________________________ Physical Address __________________________________

________________________________________________ ________________________________________________ Mailing Address (if different) ________________________

FamilyCARE 3

IHC Family Whanau Liaisons “Connecting with your community”

The IHC Family-Whānau Liaison programme is a pilot programme running in Northland, Manawatū/ Horowhenua and Christchurch.

Supporting families of young people and children with intellectual disabilities to access funding and service support.

Visit our website: ihc.org.nz/ihc-family-whanau-liaisons With thanks to the IHC Foundation

reflections

Journeys

I’m not sure whether to roll my eyes or admire my efforts to participate in rope skipping at last year’s Christmas party. A bit of both, maybe. As I went in for my very first skip (after just the one glass of wine) I tripped on a tree root and fell, landing on my wrist and hip. At first I thought only my pride was injured. But by the next day I knew I’d hurt myself physically as well. It took a few weeks for my fractured wrist to be diagnosed and several months before a scan showed a hard to detect hip fracture. By then I’d had hours of medical visits, acupuncture, physiotherapy, and treatments for pain. Recovery from the hip injury took most of 2018. Through this time I have thought so often of the many people I know (many of them readers of Family Care) who have long-term disabilities and painful conditions that affect their mobility. Living with chronic pain and difficulties accessing stairs, shops, offices, and public places affects every part of life. If you’re battling pain and struggling to get about, you have my full sympathy! Although I know tripping while skipping was ‘just one of those things’, I’m wary of this type of activity now. How safe should we play things as we get older? It’s a question I’m not sure how to answer. A woman in her 70s who still surfs with her grandson scoffed at the idea of being limited by a one-off unfortunate injury. But after a year of recovery (and agony in those early stages) I’ll give skipping a miss this year. I’ve been wondering how you’ve all been faring.

We had the misfortune of our printer going out of business with our funds to publish the magazine, which we had prepaid in good faith. That was painful, too! But here we are, back again, with another printed edition to come in six months, and hopefully an electronic issue in between. If you are on our mailing list you’ll continue to receive your copy of Family Care, and if you send us a completed reader gift entry form (page 7) we can also email regular news and updates. Not everyone has the internet, of course, but if you do please send your details so you can receive all of the information and resources we share during the year. Recently I’ve been thinking of Zanne Aram, one of our original readers, who we has passed away. A survivor of the Holocaust, Zanne contributed many letters and articles over the years and I will miss hearing from her. We met Ian Briasco when he generously provided beautiful reader gifts while managing the NZ company Kurtovich Journals. In his early retirement he joined us to help keep the magazine going. Ian has passed away too at the age of just 63. He was a kind and wonderful man who loved Family Care and shared many great ideas about how we could continue to produce a magazine readers would enjoy. Thank you Ian. He and Zanne were special to Family Care and we dedicate this issue to them. After hearing from so many of you recently, I have realised how important Family Care is to connect, inform, and entertain our readers. It’s been a pleasure to put this issue together for you. Warmest wishes til next time!

FAMILY CARE FRIENDS

FamilyCARE Editor Laurie Hilsgen Contributors Simon Broad, Adrienne Court, Virginia Linton, Sandwich Gen Jane, Katrina Sneath, Sarah Wale Advertising + Inquiries centre@carers.net.nz Phone 09 360 7221 Publisher Family Care NZ PO Box 47-385 Ponsonby, Auckland 1144 ISSN 1177-3340 Print 2230-4819 Digital Disclaimer Articles and opinions do not necessarily reflect the views of Carers NZ, Family Care, or advertisers.

Winners of our giveaways will receive their gifts within 6-8 weeks of each draw. By entering a reader gift draw your details may be provided to the supplier of that gift. If you do not want your details to be provided, note this on your entry form. Copyright is owned by the creators of images and graphics used in Family Care; see individual credits below.

Cover image Alena Haurylik, shutterstock.com Copyright Family Care. All rights reserved.

You'll find our entry form for all reader gifts on page 7!

Your magazine is supported by these organisations!

Send us your email address so we can notify you of gift draws, news, and provide a link to read Family Care online!

Just complete our gift draw form on page 7 and include your email address or send your online details to centre@carers.net.nz Continence NZ, Disability Vehicle Rentals, Flame Art, Freedom Chair, IHC, Quinn Engineering, Radius Care, swathe.me, Tableau Towbars

www.carers.net.nz

Many of the images and illustrations in this issue were sourced from shutterstock.com or as indicated: P3: Fototip, Ekaterina Kondratova, Ditty About Summer; P5: Andrew Burgess; P6: Rook76, Alexander Kirch; P7: JC Through the Lens; P8: Phase4Studios; P9: Aaron Amat, Dreamsfolklore; P10-11: Heliopixel, Andrzej Rostek, Elena Katkova, VAnisimov, E Dragan; P16-19: Nattika, Piotr Zacj, IFaritovna, Pixelshot, Eivasla, ThamKC, Ekaterina Kondratova, Jiang Hongyan, Sunny Forest, Fototip, Africa Studio; P20: VStockStudio; Ditty About Summer; P22-23: Leung Chopan, Chris Tina, E Kramar; P24: Ditty About Summer; P22-23: Leung Chopan, E Kramar, Chris Tina; P24: Ditty About Summer; P28-29: Stockforlife, Green Space, BestPhotoPlus; P33: Kiwi Coffin Club; P36: Alena Haurylik; P37: Alexander Kirch; P38: Bitt24; P41-42: Odua Images, Albina Glisic, Africa Studio

FamilyCARE 5

feedback

your say WE’D LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU!

Share your thoughts, or ask other readers for advice. Send your comments to info@carers.net.nz, or post them to PO Box 47-385, Ponsonby 1144.

Sharing

A special thank you for your amazing magazine which is always full of interesting, relevant and very helpful information and stories. Our copies, sent to Communicare, are shared with many of our members and passed on to others in our friendship centres. Having a printed copy to pass around is wonderful as many are without emails and computers as you know.

We appreciate your fabulous magazine.

E ASBURY, CRAFT THERAPIST COMMUNICARE

Hard to choose

Please accept the enclosed donation, as your magazines are worth a lot to me and to so many other like-minded people. The time and effort you put into keep it all going out to so many is absolutely wonderful! A little funny anecdote – a friend of mine is in a rest home after suffering a stroke and I thought the magazine could be a cheer and interest and easy to browse through with all the colourful articles and advertisements.

As I sorted through my copies I kept finding more and more articles I had missed reading and therefore wanted to keep!

I ended up with a row bent

Community spirit I felt motivated to drop you a line to empathise with your burglary experience.

Same thing happened to me last year. Woke at 5am to see a hooded person quietly leaving my bedroom.

Decided silence was the sensible option – waited until he should have left the house before going into 111 mode. He took a large shopping bag filled with wallet, camera, jewellery etc. Plainly had crept through house with a very small torch. No fingerprints identifiable on rear door he’d broken in by. Police quick on the scene, had good idea who it had been, interviews at a 16 year old boy’s home.

Nothing found, denial, and coincidentally the boy went to Auckland to visit Nana the following day. No outcome except for my nearly empty wallet turning up in rural

open at different places for me to peruse and only one to give away! Dear me! But lots of happy reading ... again!

ESTER HILL, MT MAUNGANUI

undergrowth months later!

Anyway, given I am 80 and live alone, I’m just glad no one was hurt, physically anyway.

My insurance company was very helpful and easy to deal with. While I’m writing, thank you for Family Care – can’t hand it to anyone else as I generally cut out so many informative items! Ages ago it was agreed I should get 3 or 4 extra copies for distribution on the information table at our monthly Grey Power members meeting. I can tell you there’s an unseemly brawl to get a copy when I pre-announce the availability! A friend in high position of older healthcare at our local DHB was visiting the day the new magazine arrived.

Asked for a copy to ‘take to work’. I agreed and suggested the DHB subscribe and put the magazines in relevant areas… shall nag! I am one of those readers without computer or

READER STORY

email and spend quite a lot of time lobbying on ‘our’ behalf – Council, DHB, and assorted suppliers. Thank you sincerely for your approach to print!

MARGARET W, LEVIN

Thank you Ester and Margaret.

We are happy to send a copy of the latest issue to people who are interested. Get in touch and we can organise this!

Our correspondents this time each receive a luxury bar from Whittaker’s Artisan Collection, combining fine cocoa with delicious ingredients sourced directly from New Zealand’s finest artisan producers. Available from supermarkets nationwide. $4.99. See all varieties at www.whittakers.co.nz

Send your letters to Family Care, PO Box 47-385, Ponsonby, Auckland 1144 6 FamilyCARE

www.carers.net.nz

One Entry for All Gift Draws!

Inspiration and Sharing Thank you for the latest edition of your fantastic magazine!

The story about the Camino Walk rang a chord with me – it was on my ‘to do’ list, but circumstances (finance, disability, family crisis) changed that, so it was great to read, especially Ruth’s writing of her experience. I loved the last issue’s ‘months of caring themes’, the recipes, and am pleased you are still providing hard copy! Keep up the amazing work you do in providing support and information for those with disabilities and carers.

H HARRIS

Other readers may be interested in my recent experiences with an age-old disease. I went to bed the other night having done nothing extraordinary. The only alcohol I consumed was two tots of Irish whiskey. However this was enough to make my big toe swell up and give me violent pain. A visit to the doctor confirmed my worst fears: “You’ve got gout, old chap,” he said. GOUT! But this is an old man’s disease associated with high living, and I have never dined on caviar in my life, I protested. That is an old wive’s tale, he reassured me. Gout has nothing to do with rich foods but is simply a buildup of uric acid in the system, which your Irish whiskey did not help at all. He gave me a card of tablets, the very first of which took away the pain. Thereafter my toe ‘swelled down’ to normal size and I was cured. So the moral of my story is simply this: do not eat or drink anything to which you are unaccustomed, and have regular blood tests which will show up nasties like a rise in uric acid in the bloodstream.

GORDON COOPER

Good morning! First I would like to thank you for the unexpected gift of coconut oil. I have never used it before and found some ‘for and against’ information about it.

Everything in moderation, I presume. As I have diabetes, I am very interested in articles about my condition and was interested to read recently about the so-called 8 week blood sugar diet. No potatoes, bread or sugar (of course). What do people eat on this diet? I had macaroni cheese last night and my blood sugar reading was up, naturally; all pasta, rice, and potatoes do this. I have been ill with low blood pressure, an unpleasant experience, losing consciousness in the pool where I swim every morning, so no work or swimming since then. Love your recipes and make most of them. PM: blood pressure is OK now! Thank you for the lovely magazine.

FRANCESCA

Just complete and return this form and you will be entered into every draw from our latest issue! One entry per person please.

We'd love to know more about what you like. Please tell us about yourself (tick any that apply)!  

I am a family carer for another/others I am a 'self carer' managing my own health and disability needs  I care for a child or young person with a disability  I have (or assist someone who has) these conditions or health issues: _______________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________ I work in health and disability  I  work for a community organisation  I share my magazine with others (if so, how many

others see your copy of Family Care: _________ )

I would most like to win these reader gifts: 1. _____________________________________________________ 2. _____________________________________________________ 3. _____________________________________________________

Name ___________________________________________ Physical Address __________________________________

________________________________________________ _________________________________________________ Mailing Address (if different)_________________________

________________________________________________ ____________________________ Post Code___________

Update your details! Every form with an email address will go in the draw for a mystery prize.

Email* ___________________________________________ Mobile___________________Phone___________________ * Please provide this information if you would like to receive our e-zines, bulletins, offers, and other online resources.

Send to Family Care, PO Box 47-385, Ponsonby, Auckland 1144!

www.carers.net.nz

FamilyCARE 7

feedback

Caring for everyone?

Reader opinion: Spouses need support too My understanding is that when a partner gets sick in New Zealand with a disabling condition (like a stroke), the spouse must act as his or her carer or vice versa due to the fact that that is a responsibility of marriage.

I find it difficult to understand this, especially if a caring spouse has other commitments and aspirations.

I believe a carer wife cannot be paid to do this extremely difficult job 24/7 at home, but if someone other than the wife becomes the carer, they can get paid for this.

My understanding is that in past times, as well as in other countries at present, there is financial support for family members to help through this extremely difficult stage (paid for by government).

There are other issues to consider than money and income.

Don’t individuals have their own special needs and require care themselves to stay healthy (whether they are in a marriage situation or not)?

I believe it is important to also view things from the perspective of the family carer (spouses in particular), their own needs, their aspirations, their self-esteem, and their independence.

As well as the tensions of fulltime caring, which can impact on stress levels, and health hazards (stroke, heart problems resulting from too much damaging stress etc) experienced by the carer who is often no longer able to have an independent life and may not be able to deliver this level of care.

There is also the stigma of carers doing this type of work, when society says that everything which it values has to have financial rewards, particularly nowadays.

Not everyone can do this work.

I believe that being a carer is a vocation, just like nursing, and that there should be more assistance to relieve the extra stresses/tension

IT’S IMPORTANT TO LOOK NOT ONLY AT THE NEEDS OF THE DISABLED PERSON, BUT ALSO OF THOSE WHO LIVE WITH THEM. placed on families who have to suffer such unfortunate situations.

Kate Sheppard worked to secure independence and the vote for women in NZ, but in my opinion, this progress currently doesn’t translate to disability support for close family members.

Independence and respecting that a woman in any relationship has the right to have her own life, instead of being bound to very significant caring responsibilities (when before it was shared duties) is in my opinion of utmost importance.

Plus age should be looked at. An older woman often isn’t able to do things the

same as a younger person. And isn’t marriage also a partnership where people can be independent?

Moreover, I don’t suspect any woman who is married has totally the same friendships or interests in life as their spouse. Nor food choices.

Caring can mean denying their own identity as a person.

My view is that it is important to not only look at the needs of the disabled person, but also the needs of those who live with them.

These needs should be assessed before deciding whether the spouse is the right person for the job, not have such situations imposed automatically.

These are my views as a woman carer.

Thank you very much for your kind assistance and all the help you provide to bring attention to the issues of family carers, including woman like me.

Many thanks and do keep up the great work. See She Cares, P44!

TELL US WHAT YOU THINK!

BOOKS PRIZE!

8 FamilyCARE

Letters published next time will win a mystery book prize! We have many lovely books to give away. Send your letters to Family Care, PO Box 47-385, Ponsonby, Auckland 1144.

www.carers.net.nz

Easy treats at home Food for thought

We enjoy your very informative publication. At 81 and 84, we are of the age that appreciates all your helpful ideas. We have been married for more than 60 years and have been dancing together since we were 15 years old.

We went to college in Tauranga together and have only ever had the one partner!

We thought other readers might enjoy these very easy and useful recipes. We have downsized to 400sq metres from our 1.5 acre property. We had a mixed orchard, covered berry garden, and two nurseries where we grew citrus, fruit and veges. We now do the same in our smaller area. Colin cuts boxes of kindling for our five grownup farming families, whilst I do sewing for them or embroidery. We don’t need home help, and both still drive and manage our two properties. Still mowing the lawns!

MICROWAVE LEMON HONEY This takes just six minutes to make!

2 eggs 2 lemons ¾ cup sugar 1 tsp butter Grate lemons, put zest aside.

Juice lemons and beat 2 eggs well in juice. Add sugar, zest and butter. Cook 6 minutes in microwave on high, stirring every two minutes.

EASY ICE CREAM

1 tin evaporated milk (chilled) ¾ cup sugar ¼ cup lemon juice

Beat chilled milk well till thick. Add a splash of vanilla, sugar, and lemon juice.

Beat again till thick. Pour into a 2 litre ice cream tub and freeze. Should the mixture separate, just mix with a fork and freeze again until set.

HOPE AND COLIN WADE

Paper still best?

I assist an elderly friend who has poor vision and some memory loss.

She finds it difficult to know what day it is, so there is continual risk of medical appointments being missed, or her being away on some outing at a time that the district nurse had arranged to call. To help I have made up a large format calendar system. It consists of a short open box holding loose pages, one day to a page. The pages sit leaning back slightly from vertical. Each day’s details are printed on the top half of the page and the front side of the box is cut down, so

www.carers.net.nz

that the current day (at the front) can be seen. Individual pages are one quarter A4 size and the box is just cardboard. My friend spends most of her day sitting in her armchair and the calendar box is on the table at her side, within comfortable view and reach. The essential thing for her to remember each day is to remove the front page and, if it is too much effort to take it to the rubbish, to stick it at the very back.

Details such as birthdays, anniversaries, public holidays, daylight savings etc can be printed for relevant days, maybe as a practical reminder, to add interest or to evoke welcome memories. Notes can be handwritten, of course, and the calendar page is the ideal place to directly record any arrangement made by phone. I provide pages for only the current week and the next three so there is not a thick, tightly-packed stack. There’s room to keep a pen inside also. What if any pages get misplaced or accidentally thrown out ahead of date? As an overlap there is a separate A4 clipboard with weekly sheets.

Each is divided into eight single panels for each day plus one for notes concerning future dates. Here calendar notes are repeated (just handwritten) and again there are four sheets, covering this week plus the three ahead. The clipboard is also

where appointment cards, hospital notices and so on are kept, placed in order behind the weekly sheet that they refer to. This avoids cluttering up the calendar box and they are held up by the clip. Each week I bring another weekly sheet and seven more day pages, and check if anything is on the programme for the week ahead. I may need to phone with a further reminder closer to some important event. As I call most days, I can easily check pages are still in order and remove those for days past. If notes have been added to day pages, they may need to be copied to the weekly sheet and/ or alert me of the need for a further reminder. Readers who feel this setup would help someone they care for can pen me a short request at PO Box 11104, Hillcrest, Hamilton 3251.

It is easily produced on a computer and printer (as is a large format phone list, medicines reminder notice and groceries checklist for that matter). I would be glad to provide a sample and pass on the layout specifications that I use. These could be adapted to better suit other individual requirements.

D HALL

FamilyCARE 9

LITT WAY LE S LOVETO YOU RSEL F

MADE FOR WALKING

Keep your favourite walking apparel handy (and the lead for your dog, if you have one) so you can head out the door quickly. If things are at your fingertips, you’re more likely to have regular walks!

Wellbeing Time for me.

Time in the sunshine.

Time with loved ones.

Time to be.

BERRY GOODNESS

Berries are an ideal source of vitamins and antioxidants.

Enjoy them fresh during the warmer months, or frozen year round!

PEACE OF MIND

Make time to review everything: your Will, Enduring Powers of Attorney, passport, tax, medical checks, services you might get cheaper from another supplier (your bank and credit card fees, interest on any investments, power, phone, internet, insurance). Is it time to sort and sell unwanted items and get rid of old paperwork? To be more active? A few hours of checking and pondering could reveal surprising savings, and bring peace of mind as you organise your affairs.

I like to walk around with bare feet and I don’t like to comb my hair.

Beyonce

10 FamilyCARE

www.carers.net.nz

MOISTURE BOOST

Antipodes’ Delight Hand and Body Cream helps deliver a restorative package of essential nutrients and vital oils. $42.90. Or try the latest Antipodes lipsticks, Dusky Sound Pink and Remarkably Red ($34 each). Available at stores nationwide or www.antipodesnature.com EACH!

Help if you care for a friend or family member

A PRIZE PACK WITH ONE OF

Carers NZ produces many free resources. You can find them at www.carers.net.nz or phone 0800 777 797 to order copies for yourself, or bulk copies for carers in your network.

REPLENISH!

Bio-Oil is a specialist skin care oil that is easily absorbed without leaving the skin feeling greasy. It helps replenish natural oils lost through the skin’s surface to maintain its delicate moisture balance. Suitable for sensitive skin and formulated for use on the face as well as the body.

Assists with scars, uneven skin tone, and ageing skin as well as hydration.

Purchase at pharmacies nationally or learn more at www.bio-oil.com ONE OF 6 200ML BOTTLES OF BIO-OIL VALUED AT $45.95 EACH!

Many carers feel isolated and aren’t sure what help is out there for them.

The entry form for Family Ca re giveaways is on page 7!

ROSEHIP RANGE

Hydrating protection!

Essano’s Rosehip skin care range contains the goodness of Certified Organic rosehip oil and active natural ingredients such as aloe vera, shea butter, and plant peptides. These affordable products can be purchased at Countdown and New World supermarkets, and selected pharmacies nationwide.

1 OF 2 ESSANO ROSEHIP GIFT PACKS CONTAINING A SELECTION OF FIVE SKIN CARE PRODUCTS WORTH $115 EACH! www.carers.net.nz

Our resources are designed specially for all carers including those supporting an older person, older carers, and young carers aged under 24.

Contact Carers NZ if you need advice, have a question, or to request any of our resources.

0800 777 797 centre@carers.net.nz www.carers.net.nz facebook.com/CarersNZ facebook.com/YoungCarersNZ FamilyCARE 11

books, music, film

OUR PICKS! THE RAW KITCHEN

Creative raw recipes for any occasion Olivia Scott’s beautiful book is available from bookstores ($59.99) or buy online at www.beatnikshop.com 6 COPIES TO BE WON!

RADICCHIO TACOS Guacamole Flesh of 1 avocado 3 tbsp lemon juice ½ tsp Himalayan sea salt ½ tsp freshly ground black pepper 2 tbsp tamari (optional) Pineapple salsa 10 cherry tomatoes, diced ½ cup (115g) finely chopped pineapple Juice of 4 lemons ¼ cup (7g) mint leaves ½ tsp Himalayan sea salt ½ chilli, seeds removed, slice fine ½ cup (100g) corn kernels ¼ cup (7g) finely chopped coriander leaves plus extra to garnish To serve 900g radicchio 2 cups walnut mince (see recipe opposite) To prepare guacamole, place avocado in a small bowl and mash with a fork.

Add lemon juice, salt, pepper, and tamari. Continue to mash until well combined and creamy. Set aside.

ORIGAMI ART

To make the salsa, combine ingredients in a bowl and stir until well mixed. Set aside. Remove stalks from radicchio and wash the leaves. Arrange leaves on two plates. Place spoonfuls of walnut mince on each leaf, dollop guacamole on top, and dress with a spoonful of salsa. Garnish with extra coriander leaves. Serves 2.

Tip! Lay all components on the table so guests can help themselves, or arrange made-up tacos on a plate.

Walnut Mince 2 cups (200g) walnuts 1 tbsp rice malt syrup 1 tsp smoked paprika 1 clove garlic ½ tsp ground cumin ½ tsp ground coriander 3 tbsp tamari 1 tsp liquid smoke (optional) Place all ingredients in a food processor and process on medium for 2 minutes.

Store refrigerated in an airtight container for up to two weeks.

Makes 2½ cups.

Dr Richard Chambers, a clinical psychologist and internationally recognised expert in mindfulness, extends the concept of art therapy with 15 beautifully presented origami projects.

Ease the mind and soothe the soul, for anyone wanting a calmer more stress-free life. RRP $19.99, at booksellers or exislepublishing.com 1 OF 3 COPIES!

NATURAL PLAY

Louise Cuckow takes an ordinary day and turns it into an opportunity for childhood creativity.

This beautifully presented activity book is designed for 3-9 year olds.

See Play Do encourages creative thought processes, celebrating art and the act of creation as a journey with no defined result.

Try activities that move children’s play away from devices and back to natural creative play and exploration. $34.99 from booksellers, or buy online at www.beatnikshop.com WE HAVE 4 COPIES TO GIVE AWAY!

SEE OUR GIVEAWAY ENTRY FORM ON PAGE 7 12 FamilyCARE

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RECOMMENDED DON’T WORRY, HE WON’T GET FAR ON FOOT

John Callahan has a lust for life, a knack for offcolour jokes, and a drinking problem.

When an all-night bender ends in a catastrophic car accident, John wakes up to the reality of being a wheelchair user for the rest of his life. In his journey back from rock bottom, his honesty and wicked sense of humour turn out to be his saving grace, as he makes friends with an oddball AA group, finds that love is not beyond his reach, and develops a talent for drawing irreverent and sometimes shocking cartoons.

An uplifting biopic about the life of Oregon artist John Callahan.

Starring Joaquin Phoenix, Jonah Hill (The Wolf of Wall Street) and Rooney Mara (Carol), and directed and written by Gus Van Sant (Milk). Based on John Callahan’s memoir of the same name.

MEMOIRS OF A CODA

Evie Mahoney (nee Whiting) is a CODA, a Child of Deaf Adults, raised in Auckland. Being first born, her early life was mainly in a deaf environment and she was sensitive to how hearing people outside that environment reacted to her family.

She lived between the two cultures and naturally slipped into the role of interpreter from a young age. Six decades later Evie is happy to have been raised by inspiring parents and enjoys the special dimension the deaf culture has given her.

Charming and informative, What does the sea sound like? can be purchased for $30 at bookshops or email paul.gpm@xtra.co.nz (Mary Egan Publishing).

4 COPIES TO BE WON!

Evie’s parents (front) and their children Rosanne, Jeffrey, Michele, Evie, Raewyn and Eric.

THE ECZEMA DETOX BOOK

Eat your way to beautiful skin with delicious, easy to prepare dishes the whole family will enjoy. These recipes are dairy-free and include gluten-free, vegan, high protein, and children’s options. The recipes form part of the book’s three tailored programmes, suitable for everyone from babies to the elderly, that treat mild to severe skin problems including all types of eczema, dermatitis, psoriasis, dandruff, hives, red skin syndrome, topical steroid withdrawal, rosacea and more. Author Karen Fischer, known as the ‘eczema nutritionist’, shares her 15 years of practical experience from working with thousands of eczema patients from around the world. If you’ve tried everything and you still have skin rashes, this may help! exislepublishing.com, $34.99 or ebook $9.99.

1 OF 4 COPIES! www.carers.net.nz

FamilyCARE 13

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GARDENING Foxton Style!

Garden advice from Simon Broad With the warmer weather comes my second most favourite time of the planting calender year, after spring. The days are longer, and the soil is good to work with.

A lot of you will do some traveling at some stage of your life, either overseas or around New Zealand.

My idea of traveling is to hop on my mobility scooter to roam the streets of Foxton looking at other people’s gardens, and getting a cutting or three.

I have heard that some people treat travel as a kind of therapy. I would rather be out in my gardens, but everyone to their own, as long as it works for you.

Why not incorporate your travels and go around your town or city looking at gardens? If you find one of particular interest, call in and ask the occupants if you can have a guided tour. Most gardeners would be more than happy to show you around their own piece of paradise. I have had people, mainly from out of town holidaying at Foxton Beach, ring me or call in and ask if they can have a look around my ‘ranch’, and I am always happy to oblige. Then they generally buy some plants for their own Bach at the Beach. A win/win situation.

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PLAN FOR THE SEASONS

When you think of summer, what comes to mind? Fruit, hot weather, and longer days, and salads? It is a very busy time of year for me, planting and weeding wise.

By using my glasshouse my workload has increased significantly.

But without my gardening I would just lounge around inside feeling sorry for myself.

It’s not in my DNA to be idle for a long period. I’ve seen too many people with a moaning outlook on life, forever using the ‘can’t’ word.

We didn’t ask to be disabled or elderly,

ONE OF THE MANY JOYS OF GARDENING IS BEING ABLE TO PICK WHATEVER IS IN SEASON FOR THAT NIGHT’S DINNER, KNOWING IT’S SPRAY FREE AND FRESHLY GROWN BY YOU. IT’S A FEELING THAT ONLY A GARDENER CAN APPRECIATE.

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but we are, so get over it. I know this sounds harsh, but it is my opinion, and mine only.

If I get one person out into their garden, I have achieved my objective of getting people into the fresh air instead of sitting around staring aimlessly at their phones or playing games on the computer.

One of the many joys of gardening is enjoying the outdoors in your special space where you can pick anything that you like for that night’s dinner, knowing that you grew it. It is a joy that only a gardener can appreciate.

GLASSHOUSE UPDATE

I like to plant beefsteak, moneymaker, and Italian tomatoes in the ground, and capsicums in large pots in my glasshouse.

When the glasshouse was first put up, Mike and I had a cauliflower growing challenge.

One day I checked mine and saw a cauliflower about the size of a 20 cent coin. I was so excited! So off Sasha the cat and I went down to Mike and Jackie’s to have a skite, only to find out that Mike’s were the size of golf balls.

But then my cauliflowers started to get bigger, and looked like a win for me at last.

Then they were ready to be picked, albeit a couple of weeks after Mike had picked his and Jackie had them in their freezer.

I froze some of mine, and they tasted divine. But the challenge had already been won by Mike.

HARVESTING

When I have tomatoes, capsicums, celery and other vegetables ready to harvest I bring them inside, prepare them, and into the freezer they go.

I use the tomatoes for soup, relishes, and tomato sauce. The celery and capsicums are used for salads, keeping

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Preparing garden beds

Forward planning for the next season is a secret of gardening success.

The soil still needs to be ‘worked’, composted and fertilised even during colder weather.

I always do this when I completely empty a bed.

I generally give it a good forking over and a layer of grass clippings, sprinkled with a fine layer of garden lime, blood and bone, and a good homemade compost.

I then let it all rest for a month or so, allowing the elements to do what Mother Nature does best.

Then out comes the fork to aerate the soil and allow the worms to do their thing. I will then leave it until it’s ready to fork over and plant again.

This approach has worked for me in the past, so why change a winning formula?

four green capsicums and some celery for the tomato soup. Most other vegetables such as new potatoes are eaten the day they are dug up. It is an exciting time for me to have a daily harvest.

But the best part is the making of the vegetables into soups, relishes, minced garlic, and seeing them either in the freezer or on the shelf.

My beetroot gets bottled too.

All of these garden goodies are popular with my regular customers, and I generally run out. Of course family and neighbours get a good feed of any excess.

RECIPES

I make up my own version of minced garlic that you may buy in your local supermarket, and it would have to be one of my bestsellers. So much so that the more I make, the more I sell. But I can only grow so much garlic.

Last year I planted 250 cloves. I’m sharing my suggestions for making minced garlic and some of my most popular pickle and chutney recipes to try for yourself.

All of my recipes are made from the produce out of my own gardens and glasshouse, and have no additives at all.

I also enjoy making biscuits and cakes using recipes supplied to me by Jackie, all tried, tested and enjoyed first by me!

As for the plants in my glasshouse, the principle is nearly the same when I pull out any spent plants, except that I will remove some of the top soil and replace it with lime, blood and bone, and compost, giving it a good regular weekly forking over.

It’s then ready to plant some seasonal vegetables depending on room or personal choice!

I’ll share those another time.

MIKE AND JACKIE

I mention Mike and Jackie a lot in my articles, and for good reason, as they would have to be two of the most genuine, nicest people I have ever met.

They are on my contact list for my medical alarm response, don’t judge me, and understand and support my disability.

Sasha has adopted them as her Nana and Granddad.

I just say to her, ‘let’s go down and see Nana and Grandad’ and her ears prick up.

When we visit their place, she will explore Mike’s gardens, sometimes leaving a calling card. Embarrassing, but they never complain.

Mike and Jackie have two daughters, Pam and Brenda. When Pam comes to visit from Aussie, she uses my computer to catch up on her games.

I don’t let many people use my computer, but Pam is allowed, such is the regard I hold for the whole family.

Happy planting and enjoy these beautiful seasons in your garden!

If you would like to contact me, as a lot of readers have for a chat, tips, advice, or to give me some advice, send an email to sf.broad@xtra.co.nz FamilyCARE 15

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Pantry Staples Simon’s gifts from the garden

BOTTLED BEETROOT

1 cup malt vinegar ½ cup sugar 2 cups of the cooked beetroot liquid 1 level tbsp salt Bring the ingredients to the boil and cool.

Cook, peel and slice beetroot.

Pack sliced beetroot into hot, sterilised jars. Fill with the liquid and use the overflow method. Screw on lids and allow to cool.

Label, with the date of making.

MINCED GARLIC

Remove enough of the outer, large cloves to save for next year’s planting. Remove all other cloves and peel away the outer skin. Cut larger cloves in half lengthways.

Put into a food processor and whizz until you reach the desired consistency.

Add a teaspoon or two of salt to taste.

Then add a tablespoon of oil, and a small amount of lemon juice to stop oxidation.

Give it another whizz to combine all the ingredients and spoon into small jars, then seal, label, date, and store in a cool place until needed. Will keep for six months or longer in the right conditions. I keep mine in the garage fridge.

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CUCUMBER PICKLE 2 kilos onions 2 kilos cucumber 1.5 litres vinegar 1 kilo sugar Brine 125g salt 2 litres water

Peel and dice cucumbers and onions, put into a large container, then cover with brine and refrigerate overnight.

Drain and wash the veges in the morning and put them into a large pot. Boil for 15 minutes and remove from heat.

Add vinegar and sugar and simmer for one hour.

Mix together 25g mustard, 25g curry powder and 25g turmeric. Add 4 tbsp cornflour mixed with vinegar to thicken.

Boil for 10 minutes, then bottle in sterilised jars, seal and label.

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GREEN TOMATO CHUTNEY 600g green tomatoes 1 large onion 250g sultanas 250g brown sugar 1 tsp cayenne pepper 1 tsp nutmeg 500ml malt vinegar

Chop the tomatoes and onions, sprinkle with salt and leave overnight. Drain, then add all other ingredients.

Bring to the boil, then simmer for an hour until a smooth pulp consistency. Let cool and transfer into sterilised jars.

TOMATO SAUCE 6kg tomatoes 3 diced large apples 6 diced onions 1 tbsp cloves 1 tbsp chilli flakes 1 tbsp allspice ¼ cup black pepper ½ cup salt 4 cups sugar 1 quart malt vinegar

Put all ingredients except vinegar into a large pot. Boil for 3-4 hours. Add vinegar at the last hour. Keep boiling. Strain into colander. Pour into sterilised bottles. Thicken with cornflour to the desired thickness. I used 6 heaped tbsp mixed with water.

CRUMBLE TOPPING

Use whatever fruit you have on hand.

Apple and peach go well together.

2 tbsp brown sugar 1 tbsp cinnamon 1 cup flour 1 tsp baking powder 50g butter ¼ cup sugar Sprinkle brown sugar and cinnamon over the fruit. Sift flour and baking powder into a bowl. Cut in butter until it resembles coarse breadcrumbs. Stir in sugar. Spoon over the fruit. Bake until a light golden brown.

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FamilyCARE 17

feature

Our Grandparents

all together

Jenny and Tony Pritchard live an hour’s drive from their eldest grandson, Jamie, the son of their second son, Stephen.

When Jamie was born, his parents were in their mid 30s. It was the same for his other two grandparents: they were also first-time grandparents. So it was very exciting for everybody. All us four grandparents were often together, sharing this precious grandchild.

We all get on. We all feel the same love, and have the same goals for him.

We knew Jamie was different, probably before his parents.

I’ve taught autistic children at secondary school, and we started to notice little signs.

Some stages in development weren’t happening in Jamie.

There was a lack of eye contact, hands continually flapping.

He looked out the window at the trees instead of at the people close by.

With the other grandparents, we organised to have a Jamie Day once a fortnight, either at our place or at the other grandmother’s.

It was often all four grandparents and Jamie.

It has become an important time for us and for him.

The Jamie Day, as we call it, was to focus on his needs and to learn how to help him develop.

He was in daycare (both his parents work full-time) and we felt he needed more one-to-one contact with people who loved him.

We wanted to be part of his life, and for us, living a distance 18 FamilyCARE

We hope you enjoy our extract from Janice Marriott’s wonderful book, Grandparents Talk.

away, it was important to have a special time set aside for being with him.

On the Jamie Day, throughout his preschool years we took him to playgrounds, or swimming in the sea, ordinary activities.

We were just giving him the experience of play, laughter, interaction, things he got at home as well.

He did have a teacher aide to look after him at daycare for some of the time, but we were able to give him so much more of that one-to-one. And being there were three or often four of us, we could give each other a break during the day.

We have had wonderful moments filled with laughter.

One day we were here and I had cardboard rolls and pingpong balls, and we put a ball into a roll and blew it and it popped out the other end. It was one of those precious moments when everyone was laughing together. And laughter is very important.

You see a lot of changes in all children, of course, but it has been wonderful to see Jamie’s progress. Two steps forward and one step back at times, but that is progress.

At first when we used to take Jamie out we had to be very careful where we took him. We had to avoid going anywhere where there were sudden noises or situations where he would get anxious. We can now take him to those places.

When we first took Jamie to the public library, he wouldn’t go in because of the automatic gates that open and shut. But now he has no problem with them. www.carers.net.nz

In supermarkets, the bright lights and loud music do still disturb Jamie. His parents don’t take him to the supermarket. He and Ben, his younger brother, stay with their other grandmother, Jane, on Sunday mornings, and their parents do the weekly shop without distraction.

We don’t get called Grandad and Grandma. Jamie doesn’t address us. He never has. He will say goodbye to each of us individually, but he doesn’t ever say hello.

Some autistic children don’t like to be cuddled, but Jamie does. When he is anxious, I’ll ask him if he wants a cuddle, and that pressure of one person against the other, or your arms around him, that’s part of the calming mechanism (if Jamie has a meltdown).

The Jamie Day still continues even though he is now at school.

We still pick him up from school at 3pm every Monday and take him to his house and are with him until his mother gets home from work.

Both parents have challenging jobs. They also have Ben, who is full-on and active now, an inquisitive youngster.

The four grandparents can offer the grandchildren different activities and interests.

Jane, their other grandmother, lives close to them, so she’s first call for babysitting and emergencies. The maternal grandfather can reinforce their Maori heritage.

Jamie is fascinated by light. When he was younger and could reach the light switch, he would turn the switches on and off, so Tony made him a light box, which he can carry around and switch the lights on and off. Different combinations of switches turn on different lights.

This diverted him for awhile from constantly switching the light switches on and off.

Jenny and Tony have family days at their house beside the sea, up the coast from where Jamie lives.

“Sometimes the other grandparents come out here on these days, too,” says Jenny. “Often the parents are tired at these gatherings, and that’s fine. They can snooze while we just do what grandparents do.”

She says Jamie loves the sea, watching the water move and the feeling of water.

“It’s a sensory thing. He always enjoys being in the sea. It’s a calm, shallow beach here so it’s safe. It doesn’t matter to Jamie if the water is cold, but it does to us! If he wades out too far we shout out to each other to go and get him; there is always a worry about the sea. You can’t call Jamie’s name and get a response.”

“In the future we hope for a happy, independent life for Jamie, the same as anyone wants for their grandchild. Being able to live independently, that’s what we are hoping for.”

Most grandparenting doesn’t feature in the formal statistics.

As grandparents featured in Janice’s book talk, their words reveal the varied and often heroic role they play in today’s families. Janice Marriott is an award-winning writer of novels, memoir and children’s books, and a columnist, writing tutor and grandmother. Grandparents Talk can be purchased at bookstores ($RRP$39.99), and is also available from libraries.

3 copies to be won! See our gift entry form, p7. www.carers.net.nz

help foR CarerS!

Do you support a friend or family member who is ill, has disabilities, or a chronic condition?

Carers NZ offers useful information, and advice about available help around the country!

We are a national not for profit that works with many other community, government, and charitable organisations to support those in caring situations.

Carers NZ assists carers directly via its 0800 and email services, and acts as Secretariat for the New Zealand Carers Alliance of 45+ national not for profits who are working in unity to give carers public visibility and a voice in decision-making that affects them.

Phone our National Resource Centre to request a free carer infopack or for a referral to a carer support network in your area. It's free to join our network (just call our 0800 helpline) or email centre@carers.net.nz You'll receive regular e-newsletters, email and posted updates, and we'll keep you informed about important news all carers should know about.

We'll also let you know about learning and social events you might like to attend in your area, or online!

You might also like to check out our web space that's just for carers. Visit the site regularly to see new articles, blog posts, and helpful information to support you in your role!

Visit www.carers.net.nz

centre@carers.net.nz Facebook www.facebook.com/carersnz Twitter #carersnz Pinterest CarersAir Phone Carers NZ's National Resource Centre Monday to Friday during business hours: 0800 777 797 FamilyCARE 19

feature

The Lost Art

of Mending

Hands up: how many of you give up on torn or outgrown garments, broken toys and household bits and pieces and put them in the recycling or rubbish bin?

Because imported clothes, towels and bedding can be so inexpensive nowadays, it is tempting not to bother with mending or re-making clothes as we used to.

There are very compelling reasons for doing so, however, not least of which is stemming the rise in waste slowly smothering the world.

Leaving aside altruism and the good of the planet, it may be that you particularly like a special item and don’t want it to be lost just because a child has outgrown it, or there is a rip or mark on an old wardrobe favourite.

Perhaps your child or grandchild has a much loved toy which has seen better days and needs a new ear, a patch on its toes, or more stuffing, but it would be the end of the world as we know it for that treasure to be lost to them?

You could soon fix it up and add a few years to its life and immeasurable joy to the life of a potentially bereft small person.

Most people can probably remember our mothers or grandmothers getting out their scissors, needles and thread on a Sunday afternoon.

Buttons or zips were replaced, tears patched and holes darned

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Fix old favourites, with tips from Sarah Wale!

- and that was just the mending. Then there were alterations as clothes were made to last one more season, or to clothe one more child.

Hems were taken up or, more likely, let down, or seams let out or gussets inserted where there wasn’t enough seam width to allow for a rapidly growing youngster (or one’s increasing middleaged spread).

Long pants were made into shorts, dresses cut down to create skirts, and all manner of other magic was wrought to transform ‘this old thing’ into a brand new pride and joy for the next in line.

There’s no reason why we shouldn’t do the same today.

GIVE A DARN?

I mentioned darning earlier and here I have a confession to make: I refuse to darn cheap everyday socks – they last for ages and usually by the time a heel has worn out, so has the elastic and sole, so they really aren’t worth the bother.

But thick woollen socks, without which work boots and gum boots would be unbearably uncomfortable to wear all day, are well worth bringing back to life.

The elbows of knitted garments can also wear thin and are candidates for the attention of a competent needleworker. If

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you don’t want to darn them, it is easy to find leather or acrylic elbow patches to sew on, giving sweaters a smart new look and extending the life of the garment for a long time to come.

COMPANIONABLE

If you can do basic needlework, and have time to spare, your friends and family will beat a path to your door begging you to do their little sewing jobs.

You will find great satisfaction in being useful and they will appreciate you enormously.

Hand sewing and mending are oddly companionable activities.

It makes a pleasant social occasion, and relieves the tedium of some of the more mundane tasks like reattaching buttons or hemming.

Groups of friends can get together with their work and some refreshment, as was often the case in the olden days when it was a good excuse to visit each other’s homes, and at the same time enjoy a good gossip!

To spread your skills more widely, you could put the word out locally that you are prepared to do repairs and alterations, thus earning yourself a little pocket money (though it has to be said you won’t make your fortune at it).

With more advanced ability, you could offer to remodel whole garments, such as evening gowns and wedding dresses, earning a little more than with basic mending and alterations.

Perhaps you like working with children and possess a modicum of patience, in which case you could teach the younger generation to accomplish the simpler mending tasks. That way they can eventually look after their own running repairs and makeovers.

Many schools also welcome this sort of voluntary ad hoc instruction, as do some youth groups.

A friend and I recently spent an enjoyable evening with our local

St John Youth Division where the cadets, aged from 8 to 15, all learned to sew on their hard-won badges; seeing their pride and delight in their accomplishment was very rewarding. It also showed them that we oldies know a thing or two – and that there are good and useful things to do which don’t require electronic devices.

From a selfish point of view, I had fun passing on my skills to a group of youngsters I might never have met and who now greet me when they see me about town.

TOY HOSPITAL

On the subject of mending, there are many cheap and cheerful (but much loved) toys in most homes, no longer played with because they are broken.

Your needle and thread won’t help you so much with these but, with a bit of imagination, a screwdriver, some cocktail sticks, some elastic bands and copious quantities of the right kind of glue (known as Grandma’s Special Glue in our family) there isn’t much that can’t be put right to get a favourite toy back into the hands of those that love them.

Not just toys can be mended in this way: it is also easy to make basic repairs to shoes, bags, crockery and other items that would otherwise be thrown away.

My last thought on the subject of mending and altering is that even if you don’t particularly enjoy it, you will have earned the right to feel very smug about your thriftiness, at the same time as enjoying the warm fuzzies knowing you are looking after dear old Mother Earth.

Patch a hole

Easily repair a hole in your favourite piece of apparel and enjoy it for years to come.

1

Cut around the hole to make a tidy square or rectangle. Trim away any loose threads. Cut a small notch at the corners of the hole, and turn the fabric inside out. Fold the square or rectangle’s 2cm edges onto the wrong side of the fabric and iron flat to hold in place.

Cut a square from a matching piece of fabric (from a seam or the back side of a pocket) ensuring it is at least 3cm bigger all around than the hole you are covering.

With the garment inside out, put the patch on top of the hole. Match the grain of the patch to the grain of the fabric. Loosely stitch the patch into position and remove any pins.

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4

Turn the clothing item inside out.

Fold back the 3cm excess fabric so it’s flush with the folded edge of the hole, folding the corners over each other. Insert your needle through the folded edge of the patch and stitch up diagonally, joining the two fabrics.

Continue all around the square.

Remove the basting thread.

Use a cross-stitch to finish the edges of the patch inside the garment. Cut off the tips of the patch’s corners at 45-degree angles. Fold back each edge 2cm. Cross-stitch the edges to the garment, picking up only one or two threads with each stitch. Inserting the needle from right to left creates a series of tiny Xs. Once the hole has been stitched over, iron the patch in place before turning the garment right side out.

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FamilyCARE 21

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Pathways

to wellbeing

Katrina Sneath Staying well can take conscious effort.

Try Katrina’s suggestions to improve mental, social, and physical wellbeing.

SOMETIMES MAKING CHANGES IS A CHOICE. I SEARCH FOR THE WISDOM TO FIX NEGATIVE THINKING OR IDEAS, STEP BY STEP.

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I firmly believe the secret of being happy is accepting where you are in life and making the most out of every day. I am sure that the result of this is feeling proud of ourselves. It is a matter of celebrating our successes, keeping on learning with confidence, and looking after our overall wellbeing. Let me tell you about my understanding of wellbeing and how I approach it.

MENTAL WELLBEING

I like the five tips summarised by the NHS in the UK for mental wellbeing: ‘Connect’; ‘Be active’; ‘Keep learning’; ‘Give to others’; and ‘Be mindful’. To me these steps also fit within the categories of social and physical wellbeing. The steps help us to be positive, remain engaged and deal with change.

Life is full of changes and sometimes they are new and exciting. I particularly like the quote by Eckhart Tolle, the author of The Power of Now: “Some changes look

negative on the surface but you will soon realise that space is being created in your life for something new to emerge.”

Sometimes making changes is a choice.

I search for the wisdom to fix negative changes or ideas. It is better to try to take it step by step.

When planning and considering choices, our minds can become clogged if there are too many thoughts swimming around.

When this happens to me, it can be very overwhelming and utterly confusing, so I take time to meditate or take a nap and see if everything from my mind can be cleared.

There is an app I downloaded called ‘Headspace’ which was recommended by someone I trust and respect.

It provides a guide to relaxation and dealing with stress. It helps me to take care of my life in a steady way, so there is no pressure. People have different ways to relax but it is important for everyone.

Meditation is something I use when I find www.carers.net.nz

enough time and have a quiet zone for as long as I need.

Another strategy is to talk to someone you trust to see if they can help to find solutions or solve any issues that you are dealing with.

SOCIAL WELLBEING

I think it is important to be open-minded and respectful of every individual and their opinions even if you don’t agree about everything. It is important to understand what other people are saying, and everyone should be encouraged to speak up. It is a matter of taking notice of different views so that you can apply them when relating to your own experience of life. This is how people can connect.

To be sociable I try varied activities. This helps me to find friends with common interests. When sharing interests it is important for people to meet their own needs and wants as well as meeting the needs of others.

There are lots of different ways to improve social wellbeing. I believe it can be achieved through participation in clubs, work, friendships or community activities.

I have gained a lot of benefits from being involved in different social activities.

I have enjoyed voluntary work for the Salvation Army secondhand store.

I was at the counter serving customers and also helping out with sorting out goods on display and putting out the donations in the storage room.

Being part of Salvation Army gave me a sense of belonging.

Talking to the staff made me feel connected because they were helpful and delightful to work with.

By helping customers, I had the chance to talk to different people and get to know their different backgrounds.

This was a very special connection and provided me something new from my normal daily routine.

Toastmasters were a very supportive community group that I visited for a short time. It was a very accepting environment with people from lots of different backgrounds but sharing a common interest and support for one another. I learned skills, but also, it meant talking and relating directly to people about lots of different topics and interests.

I also enjoy going to conferences on meeting the needs of people with disabilities.

At a conference in Auckland about www.carers.net.nz

finding employment I met a There is a book that helped lot of people that have the me to manage a good Tips for same interests and want to diet: Portion Perfection by Wellbeing make a difference in society.

Amanda Clark. I really do Being a part of this made recommend it. As a result 1 Connect me feel very connected with of this book, I now carefully 2 Keep active different people who come measure my meal servings.

3 Keep learning from different places, even The very clear picture 4 Give to others from overseas. guides are really helpful It was very inspiring to in understanding correct 5 Be mindful listen to others, to hear what portions.

NHS UK they lived through, their Eating well can be a lot experiences and how they more enjoyable and fulfilling fought hard for their child/ than you might imagine. relative with a disability.

I am told that because I have Down The more connections you can build, the Syndrome, my metabolism uses less stronger your relationships become. energy than most people my size, so I My family has always helped me to open have to be careful about how much I eat. doors to new opportunities and now Managing my diet is very challenging they have found an opportunity that I am for me and I personally I find sticking to a passionate about, and that is drama. strict diet is a battlefield.

I joined a drama group which provides However, understanding portion sizes a strong sense of community, working has helped a lot. closely together.

If I keep motivated through healthy diet In various performances I was part of the and keep up my exercise, I feel this also crew. I helped out backstage doing scene helps my physical wellbeing. changes.

I like to stay up late at night, but I know With future performances I am going to that sleep is also important for physical be included in acting and, with some help, wellbeing. It helps with my concentration, directing. as I make fewer mistakes and it gives me In my own time I try and go to Vincents more energy.

Art Studio, which is open to the public.

Going to bed early on weekdays is an This is really fun and I can see what others important part of maintaining wellbeing for do differently in their art. I am able to talk me. to a range of people to get advice and Waking up early also means more time suggestions about what I can do for my for physical activity during the whole day. artwork.

Another important part of physical To stay connected with my friends, I wellbeing is personal hygiene and also go into town frequently and spend grooming. time with my friends and engage in This means more than just showering conversation. every day. It also means ensuring These are all examples of ways I have fingernails are cut short and kept clean, found to improve my social wellbeing, but hair is washed with shampoo and common interests can also contribute to conditioner, and looking after my skin by physical wellbeing. washing my face morning and night.

Paying attention to my physical wellbeing makes me feel good, healthy and fit.

PHYSICAL WELLBEING This gives me lots of energy to keep up Imagine what you can do. Believe in with activities and work successfully. yourself and accomplish your goals.

This is important to help achieve my One of your goals may be to keep goals for work and home life and to fulfil healthy and fit. my potential.

It is good to be energetic and able to I believe that by looking after our mental, exercise at least three times a week. social and physical wellbeing we can be Sports activities can contribute to both happy, healthy and proud of ourselves. social and physical wellbeing.

Having a healthy diet will help support your fitness.

Katrina is a frequent public speaker It is important to fuel up healthily with and has won numerous awards for her carbohydrates, vegetables and protein in advocacy for disability rights and disabled the right proportions. people.

FamilyCARE 23

Useful things

Aids, equipment, services, and fun stuff to help you at home or out and about!

EVERYDAY SKIN CARE

Sebamed is recommended and developed by dermatologists for everyday skin care and to assist in the treatment of problem and sensitive skin. The ultra mild formulation is adjusted to pH5.5 to protect the skin’s natural pH value. There are a range of products to keep your skin hydrated. Available from just $5 at pharmacies, health stores and beautygarage.co.nz

ONE OF 2 SEBAMED GIFT BASKETS WORTH $75 EACH!

REAL FOOD SOLUTIONS

Flavour Creations’ range includes energy products, meal replacements, protein supplements, and more! There is also a Ready To Drink range in 25 flavours and three colourcoded thicknesses to make swallowing safer and easier.

These scientifically formulated products meet numerous dietary needs. Available from the Independent Living Service. Call (0800) 625 100 or buy online: www.ilsnz.org

SWIM WITH CONFIDENCE!

SlipOn Swimsuits have been designed with the philosophy that nothing should get in the way of living life to the fullest. These swimsuits can be slipped on and off in minutes! Another useful product is SlipOns’ waterproof briefs, which will contain unwanted mishaps in the pool as well as out. They are discreet and can be worn comfortably under swimwear. Great for hydrotherapy sessions, spas, and all swimming activities. The SOSecure Containment Brief can also be worn over other continence products to provide protection whilst engaging in daily activities or for a restful night’s sleep. Order online or phone (0800) 754 766, or www.sliponswimsuits.com

1 OF 2 PAIRS OF SOSECURE BRIEFS VALUED AT $52.13. WE ALSO HAVE 2 SLIPON SWIMSUITS TO GIVE AWAY VALUED AT $108.65 EACH.

THE ENTRY FORM FOR ALL FAMILY CARE GIVEAWAYS IS ON PAGE 7!

24 FamilyCARE

www.carers.net.nz

PLASTIC FREE

Earthware is a new eco friendly start up company based in New Zealand that produces reusable products to help reduce single use plastic.

Its range includes beeswax wraps, reusable fruit and vegetable produce bags, and natural bamboo straws.

Earthware believes that by making small positive changes we can all significantly reduce our impact on waste.

To help you kickstart your way to reducing your plastic footprint Earthware is giving away 3 gift packs, which include a set of beeswax wraps, reusable produce bags and bamboo straws.

Check them out at www.earthware.co.nz Get a 10% discount if you use the code EARTHWARE10!

EACH!

1 OF 3 EARTHWARE GIFT PACKS WORTH $52

Gift packs include a set of beeswax wraps, reusable produce bags for fruit and vegetables, and a set of reusable bamboo straws.

ACTIVE MINDS

Mindjig products can be bought online to provide engaging activities for people living with brain injury or dementia. They keep minds active, promote reminiscing and connection with friends and family, and help people feel a sense of achievement. You’ll find these products at www.mindjig.co.nz

A MINDJIG GIFT PACK INCLUDING DIGITAL DAY CLOCK, QWIRKLE GAME AND MINDJIG PUZZLE VALUED AT $220!

MOVE IN STYLE

Locomo sources equipment that is well designed, looks good, and that people enjoy using. The award-winning Rollz Motion transitions from walker to wheelchair in seconds!

It is ideal when you want to walk but are worried about fatigue or pain setting in. The reassurance of the wheelchair provides peace of mind to go further. The Rollz Flex is a walker disguised as an elegant shopping trolley: perfect when you need a little support, but do not want to look as though you are using a walker. These products can be purchased through Locomo or its local agents. Learn more at www.locomo.co.nz, phone (021) 821 785, or email anna@locomo.co.nz

A ROLLZ FLEX VALUED AT $899!

www.carers.net.nz

FamilyCARE 25

Our Home is Your Home Rest Home, Private Hospital & Dementia Care When support is required to continue living life to the full, Radius Care aims to make the transition into aged care as smooth as possible.

New Zealand owned and operated, our Kiwi values ensure residents are important beyond their medical needs. We constantly strive to provide the best lifestyle possible, support their hobbies and interests, and make our home their home.

Bowling championships, baking, woodwork and outings illustrate the variety of activities on offer. The seven-day activity rosters mean our residents continue to enjoy their passions every day, all the while surrounded by family and friends who can spend time with loved ones and remain an integral part of their lives with 24-hour visiting.

If questions or would like to know more, please feel free to visit any of our 22 facilities nationwide.

You’re always welcome.

Call 0800 737 2273 or visit www.radiuscare.co.nz for more information or to request an information pack.

Northland

Auckland

Bay of Plenty

Waikato

Taranaki Hawkes Bay Manawatu

Canterbury

Otago

Leaders in Care

Enjoy every

Moment

Radius Shop offers a full range of products to help you remain confident, comfortable, and in control every day.

Nova Recliner Chair

Cocoon Lift Chair

Manual with optional Castors or Electric mechanism and no castors.

Designed to reduce pressure points.

FREE SHIPPING!

Manual - $1,290.00 Electric - $1,690.00

Ultimate lift chair for comfort and functionality.

FREE SHIPPING!

Steen Recliner Chair

Monarch Power Lift Chair

Superior comfort, functionality & design. Perfect ergonomics & optimal seat depth.

Comfort with electronic rise or recline motion.

$1,699.00 FREE SHIPPING!

Single - $1,998.00 Dual - $2,399.00 XXL - $3,099.00

$1,299.00 FREE SHIPPING!

Abri-Fix Pants Super (Set of 3) Designed to provide security with superior pad fixation.

Abri-Form Premium 3600 ml-4000 ml capacity

Unisex all-in-one briefs with very high absorbency.

S, M, L, XL - $12.00

S- $36.00 M - $29.00

Abri-Man

Abri-Flex Premium

Formula 1 & 2

1400ml capacity

Pad designed for men.

Unisex pull-ups with high absorbancy.

450ml capacity - $12.00 700ml capacity - $15.00

Call 0800 213 313 or visit www.radiusshop.co.nz Prices accurate at time of printing . All prices include GST . Shipping costs apply

S- $30.00 M- $30.00

L - $32.00 XL - $33.00

L- $31.00 XL- 32.00

Monkey Business Sandwich Gen Jane says her Mum’s experience shows how important it is to have medications checked regularly.

When I was young, adults used to say the stupidest things. My favourite?

“You’ve got a monkey on your back, young lady.”

Small children would glance nervously behind them, older ones would deny it, getting crosser and less cooperative by the minute. Ridiculous.

I’ve been struggling these past couple of weeks with Mum. And after all these years, monkeys have come to mind.

She’s been constantly exhausted, grumpy and verbally aggressive. Then there’s the relentless negativity - describing everything and everyone as ‘boring’.

I’ve been doing my very best trying to separate the illness - Alzheimers - from the person. But it’s hard not taking the slights and sullenness personally. And I’ve been wondering what it’s all about.

Maybe this is what I’ve been dreading: a sudden, rapid deterioration in Mum’s condition.

28 FamilyCARE

On Friday afternoon, I pop round to the rest home and Bev the nurse takes me aside. She’s worried about Mum. So are the care staff. Every day, for more than a week now, it’s been almost impossible to get Mum going.

She refuses breakfast and lies in bed all morning, declining numerous offers of help. At lunchtime she drags herself out of bed then retreats to her room as soon as it’s over. Straight back to the horizontal.

Bev and I agree that, of themselves, these behaviours aren’t unusual.

As Alzheimers has progressed, my mother’s mood, energy and initiative have been increasingly affected.

Mum has good and bad times sometimes for an hour or so, sometimes for a whole day. But an ongoing pattern of passivity, negativity and hostile outbursts?

That’s new.

Bev has a couple of theories. Maybe Mum’s medication regime is knocking

her out, the anti-psychotic drug and the sleeping pills no longer working for her.

Or maybe it’s what we both fear, a significant step in the process of cognitive change.

“I’ll talk to the doctor,” says Bev. “Suggest that he cuts back the sleeping meds and review the rest.”

Bev phones the following afternoon. The doctor has taken Mum off almost all her medication. As of last night. Next day,

IT’S HARD NOT TAKING MUM’S SLIGHTS AND SULLENNESS PERSONALLY. AND I’VE BEEN WONDERING WHAT IT’S ALL ABOUT. www.carers.net.nz

saturdays with mum

Mum’s a different person. Up and dressed before the staff have knocked on the door offering to shower her. Greeting me happily when I breeze in after lunch.

I find Mum perched on her bed, reading a magazine, dressed and ready for a trip out.

Her room looks different too.

“I had a bit of a sort out,” says Mum. Peggy squares and books are in neat piles and the photos and ornaments have been dusted and rearranged.

QUALITY TIME

Mum and I spend a sunny afternoon exploring Ascot Street, one of the oldest roads in Wellington. Possibly the steepest

A LOVELY DAY

I’ve not been writing for six months now. Mum’s gone downhill - hardly surprising after over a decade with Alzheimers but a shock all the same.

I’ve been a bit in denial, thinking it’s just a blip. That she’ll suddenly perk up, back to her energetic self.

That she won’t be constantly exhausted, physically and mentally.

That we’ll be able to walk round art galleries, take train trips and rummage in charity shops. Rather than tiny outings followed by a cup of tea and a long lie down. Actually more like a short lie down, more confusion, another lie down, then back to the rest home.

One day I scooped Mum up and took her shopping. What that means is I drove to the shops and persuaded Mum to struggle out of the car for brief forays into stores. The kind of places Mum used to love to explore.

After less than five minutes, Mum’s about to keel over. I ask for the resting chair. It’s simple. If the shop assistant

www.carers.net.nz

I FIND MUM PERCHED ON HER BED, READING A MAGAZINE, READY FOR A TRIP OUT. as well. We peer over picket fences, admiring the blooming roses and japonica trees festooned with pear-like fruit.

We rest on the seat where the road narrows from a tiny one-way street to an even smaller brick-edged path.

We wander into shops, poring over fancy secondhand shoes and handbags.

“Consignment Boutique,” says Mum, reading the sign in the window. “Whatever next!”

Mum’s short-term memory is as bad as ever. It may even be worse.

“Where are you from?” asks the chatty shop assistant.

“Wellington,” says Mum. “I’ve lived in Wellington my entire life.”

Fifty-two years of rural living temporarily wiped from my mother’s memory. But she’s happy and mentally energetic, if a little puffed.

Jane’s beautifully written blog, Saturdays with Mum, describes special times with her Mum, who has dementia and lives in a care facility: saturdayswithmum. blogspot.co.nz

finds one we stay. I might even buy something. If they don’t, we leave. After three shops we give up, deciding to drive to my place for a sit down and a nice cup of tea.

“Is there any other sort?” asks Mum. We approach the house and a sad looking person shuffles, hunchbacked, across the road.

“Looks a bit depressed,” I say brightly. I’m driving slowly now, searching for a park.

“I’m depressed,” says Mum. “Are you?” I say, struggling with the small parking space and a suitable reply. “About what in particular?”

“About the lack of a future,” says Mum. It seems important not to dismiss this.

To stay with it even though I have no idea what to say. I park the car.

“It must be hard, being 88 …”

“I’m not depressed about being old.

It’s just that … I’m not good at anything anymore.” Mum gazes out the window.

“I’ve used up my ticket.”

“Used up your ticket. Used up your ticket!” I can’t stop saying it. I have images

of fun fairs and Eurorail passes. Mum gives me a look. “That’s sooo good, ‘You’ve used up your ticket’.”

We look at each other.

“You’re such good company,” I say.

Mum smiles and squeezes my arm.

And I think about how much Mum loves to see me every Saturday, how she always notices my hair and my clothes, how she picks up on my mood. How she asks about the children realising all the time she has no idea where they live or what they’re doing. How, in the moment, Mum has lost none of her conversational spark.

We’ve sat on the sofa, drunk tea and eaten tomato sandwiches. Mum’s preparing to go home, fussing about what she might have brought with her and whether she still has it.

She’s not sure where we’re taking her - she’s tired and can’t summon the rest home to mind. We’ve been out for less than two hours.

“I’ve had such a lovely day,” says Mum. She kisses my hair. “So have I.”

Searching for a tea shop, we arrive at a cosy pub, where we plonk ourselves down in the courtyard. We order tea and sit, soaking up the afternoon sun.

“I’ve had such a lovely afternoon,” says Mum. “Not just lovely but interesting too.

I’ve spent years walking round Thorndon.

But I’ve never been up that street.”

For now, the monkey’s gone.

FamilyCARE 29

feature

Kindred Spirits The Coffin Club movement began in New Zealand more than a decade ago.

Fancy some very personal DIY? By Sarah Wale

“And now the end is near …” We all know the opening lines to the song My Way, immortalised by Old Blue Eyes himself.

Indeed, the end will come for all of us, and nowadays many people are taking control of their own funerals.

Thus they can be sure they relieve their loved ones of the task, and often the financial burden, but also ensure that they get the sendoff they want.

A major part of the funeral planning, and expense, is the choice of coffin and that is also often a major cause of distress.

Does the family’s preference coincide with yours? Is it too fancy, too plain, too cheap, too expensive?

Who knew that buying a box could be fraught with so much difficulty?

The option more and more people are taking is the DIY one – yes, that’s right, you can Do It Yourself, designing and making your own ‘underground furniture’ as the Coffin Clubs describe the fruits of their labours!

Planning for the inevitable

The movement towards this approach started in Rotorua and has spread throughout the country, with some clubs

even springing up overseas.

The inspiration for the clubs comes from Katie Williams who, as a palliative care nurse, understood that death is very much part of life.

She wanted to challenge the grim ideas often associated with death, and the dreary monotony of many funerals.

She was talking with some fellow University of the 3rd Age members one day, discussing new directions for their continuing education programmes, and announced out of the blue that she would like to build her own coffin.

She discovered she was not alone and the first Coffin Club was formed; the rest, as they say, is history.

paintings depicting the future occupants at work or indications of their interests.

I travel a lot so I think I’d like mine to show key sights from all the countries I’ve visited.

The only limit is the imagination of the designer.

They might even be painted white or a plain colour and friends and family invited to write or draw their appreciation of your life – it’s so much nicer to hear those things while you’re alive than waiting until it’s too late!

If they are too far away, paint sticks or coloured pens can be provided for those attending the funeral to decorate your coffin with fond messages and drawings.

Practical and fun

Industry acceptance

The clubs bring together people who are interested in personalising their funerals.

As one might suppose, they are mostly people of senior years, so there is a wealth of talent and experience to be tapped.

Carpenters, joiners, artists, designers, fabric and needle workers all come together to help each other make their bespoke coffin. People with none of those talents but a desire to be different also benefit from joining a club and receiving the help and advice of other members.

Decorations may be brightly coloured paint and lashings of glitter, photos of family (or a favourite actor or singer …

Elvis is popular!) or possibly scenes from the salmon river for a keen fisherman or 32 FamilyCARE

It is not only the outward appearance which can be personalised.

www.carers.net.nz

How about a lush lining in your favourite colour, or a print fabric with a zany pattern to reflect your character?

If you ‘wouldn’t appear dead’ in cream or white satin in life, why appear in it at all?

Funeral directors, who might have resisted this movement given that coffins can start at around $5,000 and these homemade ones cost from around $200, have really come on board.

Most are willing to accommodate these coffins as they indicate it will be a happy funeral, a celebration of life far removed from the often dismal norm.

One funeral director told me how much he loves a funeral with laughter and the personal touches that photographs and a personalised coffin can bring, and he notices a positive effect on those attending the funeral.

Like minds

A welcome side effect of Coffin Club membership has proved to be the fellowship of other realists, who help each other deal with the idea of their own mortality and enable people to talk about death, what it means to them, and how they want to approach it.

Some members may have a terminal illness and this is a way of taking some control of their end of life options.

Others, often recently bereaved and wanting to spare their family the anguish of planning for their funeral, as they had recently had to do for a loved one, can find catharsis in the practicality of the venture, as well as the love and compassion of their fellows.

Frequently, they are able to begin to recover from their own loss as a result of this.

JOIN A CLUB, OR FIND OUT MORE!

If you are interested in learning about these clubs and would like to join one near you, Google ‘Coffin Clubs’ and you will find a wealth of information, or visit one of the websites that follow.

If you can’t find a Coffin Club in your area, why not start one up?

See our list of helpful websites offering advice and information about making your coffin, including how to source materials.

You will also find lots of information about planning your own funeral and all the rules and regulations you need to know, of which there are surprisingly

www.carers.net.nz

The Coffin Club movie

This short New Zealand film won attention and awards at film festivals worldwide last year. Directed by Briar March and produced by Kim Harrop, the film was a response to Briar’s own fear of ageing, and feelings of discomfort at funerals. “When I heard about the Kiwi Coffin Club I was immediately intrigued and wanted to meet the people behind it. I decided to make the film in the style of a documentary musical as I thought that the mix of genres would bring another dimension to the film’s themes and demonstrate that there is still so much to laugh about and celebrate when facing one’s mortality.” Everyone featured in the film is a member of the Kiwi Coffin Club and its oldest dancer is now in her mid 90s. “Their vitality for life and willingness to give things a go puts many of us younger folk to shame. I really hope I can be like them one day!” http://loadingdocs.net/thecoffinclub/ All photos from The Coffin Club.

few! There are also links to a swinging musical documentary film made about the Rotorua Club by its members; it’s guaranteed to get your toes tapping and put a smile on your dial!

Whatever your reason for joining, Coffin Clubs are lighthearted fun places where like-minded people meet with the same sense of purpose so that when you reach the end of your days and finally occupy your wonderful creation, you can truly say ….“I did it my way”.

HELP ON THE WEB

www.coffinclubs.co.nz or phone Katie (021) 132 8073, or write to her care of 9 Goodwin Ave, Rotorua 3015

www.diyfuneral.co.nz www.superseniors.msd.govt.nz (search ‘funeral planning’) www.goodfuneralguide.co.uk/do-it-allyourself/ http://loadingdocs.net/thecoffinclub/

BOOKS

We Did it Our Way by Katie Williams, $10.

The stories of 50 DIY coffins made and decorated by amazing people from The Kiwi Coffin Club.

Final Wishes, a workbook by Janet Ormsby, $15.

To order phone Katie (opposite) or email anneke_katie@clear.net.nz

FamilyCARE 33

feature

Protect

yourself

There is much you can do to stay safe.

By Laurie Hilsgen and NZ Police Being burgled is no fun. There are the shocks of having your home invaded and items stolen or damaged, plus the stresses of insurance, cleaning, getting replacement items ... and worrying about whether the offenders will come back for another go.

Most New Zealanders will never experience a burglary, but you can reduce the odds by making things harder for would-be thieves.

I learned this the hard way when burglars chose my home to rob while my family slept upstairs.

They chose a stormy night to disguise the sounds of breaking into our flimsy french doors, using a garden implement we had helpfully left outdoors.

With headlamps they were able to scan the interior of our living and dining areas (because our backyard was private, we never closed the blinds and curtains).

They easily spotted the computers, purses, and iPads, all snatched in moments after they prised open the old doors.

Our gate was broken and this didn’t help - access around the house into the concealed garden took seconds.

There were no fingerprints as they used gloves, so the Police had nothing to go on, and the crime (like so many burglaries) remains unsolved.

The inconvenience of replacing credit cards and laptops paled

in comparison to the mental strains that followed our burglary, especially for our teenager, who no longer felt safe when alone in the house.

We live in an apartment now but that doesn’t mean we’re immune from theft and break-ins.

We all need to follow the advice of Police, who deal every day with the aftermath of theft and prowler traumas.

We hope their suggestions help you identify and fix safety risks at home, in your community, and while out and about.

For more ideas see www.police.govt.nz

Safety advice from NZ Police

There are a number of things you can do to keep yourself secure at home. New Zealand is a relatively safe place to live and it is unlikely that you will ever have an intruder.

If you have crime or safety concerns about your neighbourhood then you should get in touch with your local Police, who will be happy to discuss these with you.

There are a number of other agencies you can contact for help and advice, such as the Citizens Advice Bureau and Age Concern. One of the best actions you can take is to get to know your neighbours.

Think ahead ›› Don’t open the door to strangers. ›› Install a peephole in your door. ›› If you don’t know someone, keep the door closed. ›› Have a phone by your bed. ›› Arrange with a neighbour to phone or visit you if your curtains aren’t open after a certain time in the morning. ›› Have a personal or medical alarm that you can press in an emergency. ›› Never tell someone that you are alone in the house. ›› Get a Life Tube from Age Concern or Neighbourhood Support. In an emergency the red Life Tube 34 FamilyCARE

sticker on your fridge will alert Police, ambulance or fire services that vital information about you is available inside the refrigerator. ›› Ask for a security checklist from Neighbourhood Support. https:// neighbourhoodsupport.co.nz ›› Don’t be tricked! If someone you don’t know asks to make a phone call from your home, get the phone number and offer to make the call yourself.

Then they don’t need to enter your home and you don’t need to open the door. ›› Never do business with strangers who come to the door, phone you or contact you via email.

›› Never talk to strangers about your financial affairs. ›› Never give out your name and address or chat if you receive a wrong number phone call. ›› Use tried and trusted tradespeople.

Get several quotes. Ask your family or Age Concern to recommend someone. ›› If you are cheated, tell Police. Help Police catch the criminal and stop other people from being cheated. ›› If you suspect someone is being cheated or abused, contact Citizens Advice Bureau, Age Concern, your community constable or local Police.

www.carers.net.nz

feature

Know your neighbours

The most important action you can take to make your place safer is to know your neighbours.

Exchange contact details, discuss your crime and safety concerns and decide what you would do in an emergency. If you or neighbours are away, follow our property protection suggestions. ›› Let neighbours know when you are going to be away. Swap holiday addresses and phone numbers. ›› Let each other know if visitors or tradespeople will be in your house while you are away. ›› Be a good neighbour. If your neighbours are away, you can help them by making their house look ‘lived in’. ›› Turn on lights at night. ›› Close curtains at night and open them during the day. ›› Mow lawns. ›› Clear mail, especially junk mail and newspapers.

›› Use their clothesline or driveway. ›› Keep an eye on their house and walk around it once a day to check it is secure. ›› Question strangers, but don’t say the neighbours are away. Write down their description and note the time and date. If you need help writing a description, visit the Neighbourhood Support website for a fact sheet (see previous page for address). ›› Write down the registration numbers of unfamiliar vehicles moving slowly or stopping in the street.

If you have an intruder, prowler or burglar You will probably never have a prowler on your property or face an intruder in your house, but you should have a plan just in case.

If you wake and find an intruder in your home: Get out if you can.

Dial 111 and ask for Police.

Listen to what Police tell you.

Don’t try and catch the intruder or block their escape.

If you have to act – yell or scream, blow a whistle.

If you suspect there is a prowler outside: Dial 111 and ask for Police.

Listen to what Police tell you Turn on all outside lights if you can.

Turn off all inside lights.

Make a loud noise to frighten the prowler away and alert your neighbours.

www.carers.net.nz

If you arrive home and think there’s a burglar inside your house: Dial 111 and ask for Police.

Don’t go inside.

Go to a safe place and wait for Police.

Stay safe indoors Install a wide-angle door viewer so you can see who is at your door.

Keep your doors and windows secure and close your curtains at night.

Invest in good quality, secure locks.

If you live alone, don’t advertise the fact. Keep your answerphone message generic – say ‘No one is available to take your call’ rather than ‘I can’t take your call’.

If you think something is not right, but you are not sure, call 111 and let Police decide.

›› Report anything suspicious to your local Police station. ›› If you think a crime is being committed or someone is in serious danger, call Police immediately on 111. ›› Start a Neighbourhood Support group. ›› Neighbourhood Support helps neighbours to talk to each other and works closely with Police and other organisations in your community to reduce crime, improve safety and prepare to deal with emergencies and natural disasters.

Civil Defence

As well as safety from intruders and theft, we all need to think about what we would do if there was a natural or community disaster.

Civil Defence helps communities prepare for, respond to and recover from disasters. It is not an emergency service that will turn up at your door. Your survival after a major disaster could depend on the food and resources you and your neighbours have between you.

Emergency services could take several days to provide you with relief or supplies.

You are responsible for preparing your family to survive with sufficient food and water, and staying warm and dry for several days after natural disasters such as floods, fires, tsunami and earthquakes.

It pays to take steps to be ready for a disaster, just in case.

For advice about how to prepare, visit the informative Civil Defence website getthru.govt.nz

FamilyCARE 35

HOUSEHOLD EMERgEncy PLAn Complete this plan with all members of your household

yOUR HOUSEHOLD

Address

Name

Phone numbers

Name

Phone numbers

Name

Phone numbers

Name

Phone numbers

Name

Phone numbers

1. If we can’t get home or contact each other we will

The Getaway Kits are stored in the

meet or leave a message at:

Name

4. The radio station (inc AM/FM frequency) we will

Contact details

tune in to for local civil defence information during an emergency

Name (back-up) Contact details Name (out of town) Contact details

2. The person responsible for collecting the children from school is:

5. Friends/neighbours who may need our help or who can help us

Name Address Phone

Name Contact details

3. Emergency Survival Items and Getaway Kit Person responsible for checking water and food

Name Address Phone

6. On a separate sheet of paper draw a plan of the Items will be checked and replenished on:

house showing places to shelter in an earthquake or storm, exits and safe assembly areas and where to turn off water, electricity and gas.

(check and replenish at least once a year)

IMPORtAnt PHOnE nUMbERS For Police , Fire or AmbulAnce c All 111 Local Police station

Water Supplier

Medical Centre

Gas Supplier

Insurance Company

Electrician

Vet/Kennel/Cattery

Plumber

Electricity Supplier

Builder

Council Emergency Helpline

HOUSEHOLD EMERgEncy cHEckLISt

gEt yOU READy SO nEED yOU cAn gEttHROUgH tHRU wHAt wILL tO gEt emerGencY SurViVAl iTemS Torch with spare batteries or a self-charging torch Radio with spare batteries Wind and waterproof clothing, sun hats, and strong outdoor shoes First aid kit and essential medicines Blankets or sleeping bags Pet supplies Emergency toilet - toilet paper and large rubbish bags Face and dust masks Check all batteries every 3 months.

Ge TAwAY KiTS Everyone in the house should have a packed getaway kit in an easily accessible place which includes: Torch and radio with spare batteries Hearing aids and spare batteries, glasses or mobility aids Emergency water and easy-to-carry food rations Extra supplies of special dietary items First aid kit and essential medicines For infants or young children – formula and food, nappies Change of clothes (wind/waterproof clothing and strong outdoor shoes) Toiletries – towel, soap, toothbrush, sanitary items, toilet paper

FooD AnD wATer For 3 DAYS or more

Blankets or sleeping bags

Non-perishable food (canned or dried food)

Face and dust masks

Food, formula and drinks for babies and small children

Pet supplies

Water (at least 3 litres per person, per day) for drinking Water for washing and cooking A primus or gas barbeque to cook on A can opener Consider stocking a two-week supply of food and water for prolonged emergencies such as a pandemic. Check and replace food and water every twelve months.

How To STore wATer • Wash bottles thoroughly in hot water. Fill each bottle with tap water until it overflows.

Add five drops of household bleach per litre of water (or half a teaspoon for 10 litres) • Store in a cool dark place and replace the water every 12 months

For more information visit the civil Defence emergency management office at your nearest council or

www.getthru.govt.nz produCed by the ministry of CiVil defenCe and emerGenCy manaGement

Important documents: Identification (birth and marriage certificates/driver’s licences and passports Financial ( insurance policies and mortgage) precious family photos

iF we HAVe To eVAcuATe we will: Take our Getaway Kit Turn off electricity and water Turn off gas only if we suspect a leak or if asked to do so by the authorities Take our pets with us

get your GREENS! Whether you grow them yourself, or buy them at the supermarket or local farmer’s market, green veges are a diet essential.

We’re fortunate in New Zealand to have a wide availability of vegetables throughout the year, thanks to our moderate climate.

Not to say we don’t have our share of unpredictable weather.

Whether this comes in the shape of storms ripping through the country, or droughts drying out the soil, they can be devastating for crops, resulting in fluctuating prices and availability.

Considering all of this, meals which don’t call for elaborate recipes, demanding out of season vegetables, are welcome in any household.

Soups and stir frys are an obvious go-to dish. And don’t forget raw options!

Salads and smoothies are fantastic for boosting our immune systems through the year.

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SEASONAL CHOICES

Over the warmer months, there’s more variety and abundance of fruit and vegetables.

For those on a tight budget, it’s useful to know what to do with an oversupply, whether it’s from something growing in your garden, or sold in bulk from local markets. Also, now is the time to use up any winter vegetables still lingering in the vege patch or freezer.

JERUSALEM ARTICHOKES

These are easy to grow, and hard to get rid of, so if you happen to have them, it’s a good idea to dream up ways of eating them!

These knobbly tubers, available in autumn and throughout winter, are sweet, nutty and creamy in flavour.

Choose even-sized roots that are free of bruising. They’ll last for several weeks in the fridge and are a good source of potassium, pre-biotic soluble fibre stored as inulin.

Slow roasting them helps to break down this inulin, which makes them more digestible.

Or, try turning them into a fermented pickle.

CHOKOS

This is another edible plant that there is often an oversupply of, especially if you happen to have a vine growing in your backyard.

The pale green fruit is very mild and lacks sweetness, so is usually cooked with other stronger tasting foods and in savoury dishes. They are also sometimes used in cakes and dessert foods.

Choko tubers and shoots (look for the most green and tender) are great in stir frys and fantastic in hearty soups.

Select firm, even-coloured chokos which are 10-15 cm long. Large, almost white chokos indicate older fruit.

Small chokos (under 5 cm) don’t need to be peeled and can be sliced and used in stir fries.

Chokos can also be pickled or used as a base for relishes.

Or, slice them thickly, then dip in egg and breadcrumbs and fry in olive oil as an alternate to eggplant in eggplant parmesan! www.carers.net.nz

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BRASSICA SOUP

This soup is fantastic for strengthening your immune system.

Packed with nutrients to support optimal liver function, broccoli is a good source of beta-carotene, and contains vitamins C, B1, B2, B3, B6, iron, magnesium, potassium, and zinc. Throw in any other green vegetables you have on hand—the idea is all about using what you’ve got, and what’s in season.

2 heads broccoli, chopped 2 tbsp oil (olive or coconut is good) 1 onion, chopped 2 celery stalks, chopped About two cups of any other vegetables and herbs on hand – parsley, mint, silverbeet, are all hardy staples and usually readily available 4 cups vegetable stock Sea salt to taste Cream to taste

Cruciferous vegetables—including broccoli, cauliflower, swede, and brussels sprouts—are some of the most nutrient-rich powerhouses you can feed your body.

In a large saucepan melt oil, and cook onion and celery until soft and translucent.

Add broccoli, including the stems. Bring to the boil with the vegetable stock then reduce heat and cook for a further 15 minutes.

Add some sea salt and chopped herbs.

Blend in a food processor or blender until smooth and pour back into the saucepan for reheating if needed.

Stir in cream to taste.

CHOKO FRITTERS

2 medium chokos Juice from ½ medium lemon 3-4 tbsp finely chopped mint, coriander or basil 2 small free range eggs ½ cup flour ¼ tsp salt Pepper to taste Oil for frying – about 2 tbsp Peel, de-seed and grate chokos. Squeeze out any excess juice.

Combine all ingredients to form a batter.

Heat oil in pan. Drop in batter about 2 tbsp per fritter.

Take care not to overcrowd the pan.

Fry for about a minute on each side.

Serve with chutney, mayo or aioli.

Choko halves can be stuffed, diced, cooked and served with a sauce, stir fried, and added to braises or stews. Use them too in fruit and vegetable salads, desserts, tarts, breads, jams or cakes, or they can be pickled or used as a base for relishes. www.carers.net.nz

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KALE CHIPS

For home gardeners, kale tends to be abundant no matter the season. Kale chips are a wonderful addition to any meal, and it’s heartening to know that roasting them still retains vitamin K. They can be a bit fiddly to get right, though. Try our tips for making them.

Get rid of the stalks. Make sure the kale is very dry (pat dry with a paper towel, or use a salad spinner if you have one).

Massage in the oil – olive or avocado oil is good. You don’t need a lot; about half a tablespoon of oil per baking sheet.

Bake for 10 – 15 minutes. Rotate the baking tray if they’re baking unevenly (no need to flip them). Then bake for 5 – 10 minutes more, keeping an eye on them – they can go from crispy to burnt in seconds.

Remove from oven and let cool slightly - chips will crisp up even more once out of the oven.

CUCUMBER PICKLE

Cucumber is another vegetable which can proliferate given the right conditions, and makes a good pickle. If you happen to have a plentiful supply and have exhausted every salad and sandwich combo out there, try this fast, easy recipe.

1 large cucumber, peeled, sliced into fingers 1 tsp salt 1 tsp celery seeds 1 tsp mustard seeds 60 ml white vinegar 50g sugar Place cucumber fingers and salt into a bowl, mix well. Leave for 10 minutes, then rinse with cold water. Drain.

Combine vinegar, sugar, celery seed and mustard seed together.

Add to cucumber slices and mix well.

Decant into a plastic container. Refrigerate for several hours before serving.

GREEN GOODNESS SMOOTHIE

Smoothies are the perfect way to get your daily intake of fruits and veges. You can use whatever is in the fridge to vary this recipe including avocado!

1 kiwifruit, peeled and sliced ½ cup cucumber, unpeeled ½ cup fresh spinach ½ cup fresh arugula or baby kale Lime juice to taste 2-4 drops liquid Stevia to taste (optional) ¼ cup water (dilute your smoothie to desired consistency with more or less water) Add several teaspoons spirulina powder if you wish.

Blend until smooth and enjoy straightaway!

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Pins &

Needles

All areas of wellbeing benefit from treatments like acupuncture and acupressure. By Angelique Kasmara Acupuncture is the most well-known traditional Chinese medicine treatment in New Zealand, and also the most established, with the Accident Compensation Corporation and some insurance companies funding treatments.

Ailments that respond well to this therapy range from migraines to musculoskeletal pain. The Acupuncture for Mental Health clinical interest group (AMH) also states that there is increasing evidence that a combination of acupuncture and standard care can lead to improved outcomes for treating mental health issues such as depression.

KATE LOOKS AT THE WHOLE PICTURE OF A PERSON: THEIR WORK, DIET, STRESS, AND WHETHER THEY HAVE ENOUGH SUPPORT IN THEIR LIVES. LISTENING IS KEY TO SUCCESS. www.carers.net.nz

For Kate Roberts, chair of the AMH, her knowledge and experience of treating mental health through acupuncture comes via a personal journey.

She experienced a life changing incident at 18, when she was badly injured in a serious car crash. The accident left her with three broken vertebrae, a punctured lung and a broken clavicle. She was in traction for several months, and spent almost a year in a full torso brace.

Even after the team of medical staff successfully treated her injuries, other symptoms lingered on. These included PTSD, insomnia, and when she was finally able to sleep, she wrestled with nightmares. She was using painkillers and sleeping aids to help alleviate these symptoms, but as the weeks turned into months without relief, she began to look into other methods to relieve her pain.

Acupuncture provided Kate with pain relief without painkillers, and also with a career. She’s from a family of healthcare providers that include doctors, nurses, and social workers.

“My family brought me up with a strong ethos of, if you’re able to take care of people, then do,” she says. “So I enrolled

in a course of study at the University of Technology, Sydney, and have never looked back. There is always something new to learn about the discipline.”

Her clinic focuses on the treatment of mental health and fertility, musculoskeletal issues, and gynaecology. With clients, she’ll look at the whole picture of a person: their work, diet, stress, and whether they have enough support in their lives.

She says working with a therapist who listens to their client is key to a successful session.

“I take time to talk to them, establish a proper connection, work out their anxieties through role play and other methods.”

How does such therapy work on someone’s mental state? The AMH says it can be considered as a legitimate alternative or adjunct to those suffering mental health conditions that are either non-responsive to pharmacological agents, non-compliant or suffer side effects. Engaging with all levels of mental health, including research, policy, education and hands on clinical practice, they also participate in Mental Health Awareness Week each year by opening their doors to the public.

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Acupressure for Anxiety

IF YOU’D LIKE TO TRY ACUPUNCTURE LOOK FOR SOMEONE WHO IS REGISTERED WITH A PROFESSIONAL BODY SUCH AS ACUPUNCTURE NEW ZEALAND.

A simpler form of acupoint stimulation is acupressure. Acupoints are stimulated using pressure instead of needle insertion. Seabands, which are found in most pharmacies, work on this principle in order to relieve nausea. Kate recommends this simple method to help relieve symptoms of anxiety.

1. The largest crease on the inner wrist, on a line with the little finger 2. The middle finger, just before the nail, on the side closest to the thumb.

3. The centre of the sole of the foot, just behind the ball.

Stimulate these points by pressing on them for about a minute on each side of the body.

Although acupuncture is widely used as a treatment for depression, its antidepressant properties are not yet fully understood. But increasing evidence demonstrates that it may be beneficial for treating depression.

Kate’s advice when searching for an acupuncturist is to find someone who is registered with a professional body such as Acupuncture New Zealand, their code of ethics, convenience in terms of locality, and qualifications.

“Do ask questions over the phone, listen closely to how they respond and see if you connect with what they’re saying.”

About Kate

Wellington-based Kate has a Masters in Traditional Chinese Medicine and is working towards her PhD at the Otago School of Medicine. Kate is a lecturer and clinical supervisor at the NZ School of Acupuncture, and has taught both clinical and theory subjects for first year through to Masters level students. In addition to her teaching, Kate runs a private clinical practice in Island Bay, specialising in the treatment of mental health, musculoskeletal conditions, and gynaecology and fertility.

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www.carers.net.nz

WE ARE CALLING FOR A BETTER RESPITE AND PAID FAMILY CARE SYSTEM WITH OUR

CAMPAIGN!

of those caring for loved ones

Unpaid carers in New Zealand are twice as likely to be female, devoting an amazing average of 30 hours a week to caregiving on top of any paid work and other family commitments.

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are women

The choice to care for someone who is unwell, elderly, or has a disability s or injury means many women suffer financially as a result; they earn 10% less than Kiwis without family caring responsibilities and wcountry w.she-cares.org can’t easily save for their own retirement – while saving w the billions of dollars.

To show them we value their contributions to family life, society, and the economy, we are rallying for a better respite and funded care system during 2018-19 with our She Cares campaign.

FIND OUT MORE AT OUR WWW.SHE-CARES.ORG

Join our network - it’s free! By connecting with Carers NZ, we can keep you informed about issues important to all family carers. Contact us on 0800 777 797 or email centre@carers.net.nz www.carers.net.nz

WEBSITE

WWW.SHE-CARES.ORG

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Women who care Carers NZ’s awareness campaign this year is devoted to the thousands of New Zealand women caring for loved ones. Are you a woman carer?

Order a free infopack to find out what help is available for you!

WHAT IS SHE CARES?

To show that we value the contributions that NZ’s overwhelmingly female force of family carers make to family life, society, and the economy, Carers NZ has launched She Cares, rallying for a better respite and funded care system.

Unpaid carers in New Zealand are twice as likely to be female, devoting an average of 30 hours a week to caring for elderly, ill, or disabled friends and family members and often suffering financially as a result – while saving the country billions of dollars.

Households of unpaid caregivers typically earn 10 percent less, while the conservative economic value of their unpaid work is $10.8 billion a year. That’s a big contribution!

Yet women who care often can’t earn, they work below their experience and qualifications to support their families, and it’s hard for these carers to save for their own retirement. It’s an injustice that Carers NZ is seeking to change.

If you are a woman carer, know that you are not alone, and that help may be available to support you in your caring role.

Learn about available help by ordering a free Carers NZ infopack: phone 0800 777 797, or email centre@carers.net.nz

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of those caring for loved ones

You can join Carers NZ’s network at no cost so we can keep you informed about news important to carers, and send helpful resources from time to time.

Learn about inspiring women carers by visiting our campaign website, https:// she-cares.org We’re sharing some of our She Cares stories here, too.

are women

“THANK YOU, SO MUCH, TO ALL THOSE WOMEN OUT THERE DOING THIS IMPORTANT WORK – YOURS IS SUCH A VITAL CONTRIBUTION TO OUR PEOPLE, TO OUR FAMILIES, AND TO OUR COUNTRY. WE SALUTE YOU.”

PRIME MINISTER JACINDA ARDERN

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WHAT CAN YOU DO TO HELP A CARER?

For Ngaire Booth, the most challenging aspect of being a carer is the sense of isolation that it brings.

Going through the pain of seeing her once energetic husband’s decline over the last 22 years from Parkinsons disease has been profound.

“Being a carer for a loved one is the loneliest of journeys. I have often wished I could adequately explain to my bosses and my friends what I was going through.”

After 36 years in Australia, they were able to relocate to their current home in Maungaturoto, where they have a dedicated and loving son.

“He checks in on me every second night. He is so generous, and is amazing.”

Please join Carers NZ for our She Cares campaign and let a woman who cares know “it’s not all up to you”. Listen, ask if you can help, and make sure she gets the information and support she needs to stay well herself. Here are other ways to help!

• Order a free infopack! Individual carers and groups can order request packs: phone 0800 777 797, email centre@carers.net.nz • Stay informed: connect with us at Facebook (facebook.com/CarersNZ) • Are you a health professional or part of an organisation? Hold a fun event for women carers and let us know about it - we’ll help with promotion and provide free infopacks!

• Remind carers you know that they need regular time out and offer practical help: around the house and garden, by assisting with caring, transport, or even money to support the many costs of caring.

• Be proactive: organise an outing, cook a meal, or surprise her with flowers from the garden or a wee gift.

We all like to be remembered and feel special! www she cares org

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Ngaire says the level of recognition and financial remuneration of carers is better over the ditch, possibly due to Australia’s larger population.

“We need to mobilise more in New Zealand, to get our voices heard,” she says. www.carers.net.nz

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A BETTER CHANCE FOR JEANNETTE

Meletilini Logan first formed a strong bond with Jeannette Queensell-Logan when she was a few months old, however she feared the tiny baby wouldn’t make it through the night. Although she’d met Jeannette a few times, this was the first time Mele had stayed up all night with her.

Born in 2014 to Jackie, a close member of the extended Logan family, late that year Jeannette was diagnosed with a major heart condition.

On Christmas Eve there was a family meeting at Starship Hospital, where the cardiology team informed them that with her medical challenges, they couldn’t do anything more for Jeannette, and that she would have just a few months to live.

“The meeting started when staff were leaving to prepare for their Christmas celebrations, and here we are waiting for the worst news,” she says, recalling that when they walked into the room, just looking at the cardiologist’s face set her heart pounding and tears flowing.

“He said, I am sorry, I am sorry. Jeannette is not in a good position for any treatment or operation.”

The baby’s 18 year old single mother was not in a position to provide the best outcomes for Jeannette, so the Logan family adopted the little girl to give her a better chance within their rock solid family.

Jeannette was legally adopted, and now lives in Auckland with her adopted parents and five siblings, fighting through many surgical procedures and cardiac arrests.

“I have been away at least six months each year from work to be with Jeannette in the hospital.”

“I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve called my family here in New Zealand and from Tonga to come over to say their final goodbyes for Jeannette.”

Despite all this, Mele says Jeannette is “a very happy girl and easygoing, who makes the most of everything. She hardly complains and has a strong will to fight back no matter what.”

Balancing her job with being Jeannette’s primary carer has been difficult for Mele.

“I have been away a lot from work. My husband has a few days off here and www.carers.net.nz

MELETILINI WOULD NOT BE ABLE TO JUGGLE CARING FOR JEANNETTE WITH HER JOB IF IT WEREN’T FOR THE SUPPORTIVE MANAGER OF THE GOVERNMENT ORGANISATION SHE WORKS FOR. there, but he has to work to pay our mortgage and the bills.”

Mele wouldn’t be able to do this if it weren’t for the supportive manager of the government department she works for, who treats staff like family members.

“I am so grateful that I have her as a manager because most carers that I know have lost their jobs due to taking too much time away from work. I will never ever forget her support.”

Even with an understanding manager, there are challenges.

“As a carer, you are at a disadvantage when it comes to even considering applying for higher positions. You can’t put in the hours required, because when your disabled loved ones are sick, you will be away from work. And you’re working hard out to make up for time lost, but it’s still not good enough.”

She says she also wouldn’t survive

without the support of her other children.

“They are able to run her feed and change the tubes.”

“My two older kids know how to draw her medication and all of them know when to give it to her; my older daughter can change Jeannette’s nappy.“ “At times I think that we can’t survive as a family when Jeannette has so often been hospitalised over the years.”

“But no matter how busy we are, we still find time for more things to do or attend together, and we can’t believe how much more resilient and stronger we are as a family.”

“Having Jeannette has opened my heart, and so my family and I are able to see the positives in everything. Also, she’s strengthening my cultural upbringing and values as a Tongan mother.”

“I have to be the main core root to hold us all together and try to balance out life.”

Giveaway time!

As part of our She Cares campaign, we’re giving away three pamper gift baskets filled with treats, worth $150 each!

If you are a family carer or would like to nominate a woman carer you know, email their details to supportteam@carers.net.nz

FamilyCARE 45

LET A WOMAN WHO CARES KNOW

“IT’S NOT ALL UP TO YOU” PLEASE JOIN CARERS NZ FOR OUR

CAMPAIGN

We are sending free infopacks to women carers during our campaign.

To order a pack, please contact us on 0800 777 797 or email centre@carers.net.nz

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of those caring for loved ones

are women

You can order bulk packs for carers in your network, They contain resources every carer should know about, plus some s fun surprises!

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WWW.SHE-CARES.ORG www.she-cares.org

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Amazing Supporters

On occasion you hear a story of a really special person and it makes the world seem like a better place. We asked readers to tell us about someone who was doing an amazing job helping them or someone in their family or wh nau. The responses were so heartwarming that we wanted to share the stories of these individuals who were making the world of difference to the people they support.

Janelle Coward

Janelle is amazing with my son. As he is home educated Janelle is able to have him during school times which allows me time to attend important meetings and appointments. Janelle always puts us first and her door is always open which is something very hard to find these days with carers. If I drop my son off and look a bit stressed the first thing she does is sit me down with a good cuppa and chat. My son Caleb is very comfortable with Janelle and they have a super relationship.

Erin Cameron

My son’s carer is like one of the family. We have been the best of friends for over 25 years now. She started working for us several years ago when we moved to Hastings. She is like a second Mum to my adult son with autism, who has seizures, brain damage, the development age of a 5 year old, with memory issues and non-verbal related behavioural issues including meltdowns.

She works flexible hours and is always very helpful - she’s like an angel from heaven. It can be a stressful job but she can turn the situation into fun with loads of laughing and hugs for both of us. She supports me at meetings for my son and is willing to learn new skills and support other staff with her knowledge and skills. She is awesome at keeping records and paperwork up to date.

Erin is my soul sister, we finish sentences for each other and she is always thinking of me and my son.

Beth Richardson

Beth has the caring nature of

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an angel and a heart of gold.

She cares for people (clients) in a way that enables them to feel good about themselves, look forward to and enjoy their days, and put smiles back on sometimes saddened or lonely faces. Families ask for her to care for their loved ones as she is able to build a trusting rapport with them and they feel listened to and cared for in every aspect of their being.

Palliative and long-term clients request Beth for her amazing calm, cheerful and loving manner, wanting her to be part of the final part of their life’s journey – which is an honour for anyone. Beth never expects thank you’s for her work, she does it for the feeling of making a difference in peoples’ lives.

Lillian Jarrett

Jillian has looked after Nathan for 28 years, she has done as much as she can to make sure he has what he needs and has access to quality community outings. She never complains about what she has to do, helps other parents of young adults tirelessly to find what they need in services any time of day or night, and always with a friendly smile. I think she is worthy of a treat.

Anela Collins

Anela has cared for her two sons with Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy all their life.

Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy is a progressive muscular condition. There is no cure and the average life span is early - mid 20s. Anela’s adult children require 24 hour care with all activities of daily living.

Anela is unable to have a night away due to their specific positioning, feeding and care needs. She has a supportive

Anela Collins team but there isn’t enough provided to meet their needs.

As a result she is required to assist every day and night.

Anela has not had a rest since her boys were children. She puts their needs first and is lucky if she gets a couple of hours’ off. She is under a lot of stress but continues to provide for her sons. I would appreciate if you consider Anela for your gift. I understand there are a lot of outstanding carers in our community. She is one that stands out most to me.

Hilary McLeod

Hilary has been my night-time support worker for several years. She works for Care on Call and goes that extra mile to ensure that I am comfortable for the night. If I have special functions to attend in the evening she will put herself out to accommodate my different timetable. She has never called in sick or taken a holiday.

Scott Deans

Scott Deans looks after his brain injured older brother, cooks and does the laundry,

takes him out so he is not isolated and makes sure he has his meds on time. Scott has helped his brother stop smoking, not just for his health, but because he was a danger to himself and could easily set fire to his home. Scott deserves a treat for all the years he has been there for his brother. He makes the best of a very sad situation. With a smile.

Anne Wilkins

I have two adult children with significant disabilities. Anne is my sister and my daughter Paula’s full time carer. She takes both Paula and my son Anton to all hospital, doctor and dentist appointments. She gave up work to provide this support to them. Anne also advocates for others and takes other people with disabilities to appointments. She is very selfless in all she does. Anne has recently become a joint Welfare Guardian with me for Anton and Paula. Anne is the most amazing sister for the support she has given me and my children.

Each of our featured Amazing Carers has received a Rosehip skin product by Essano or an Antipodes Saviour Balm mini.

We hope our winners enjoy their well deserved treats.

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BBQ Anytime!

Ideas for year round barbecues by Levin foodie and occupational therapist Adrienne Court.

Barbecues are always cheerful and these days you can even have them outdoors, at the beach, or in the backyard on fine days.

If cooking outdoors is too hard, try a special griddle pan which will cook these meat dishes almost as well.

Equipment is more portable these days, and easier to clean, so there’s no excuse not to enjoy yummy barbecued food through the year.

It’s a quick and easy meal option for weekdays, when you don’t feel like cooking a big meal, or weekends, when you can relax and catch up with loved ones.

Make BBQs a shared experience by asking friends to provide their favourite meat or vegetable dish, salad or dessert.

A selection of meats, fish or shellfish, salads, and vegetables prepared ahead of time ensures that your barbie will be stress free and fun.

You can cook just about anything on the BBQ, so be creative!

CHILLI LIME CHICKEN SKEWERS

These skewers are marinated for a least 6 hours prior to cooking (preferably overnight), and therefore can be made the day before. Quick to prepare and easy to cook, they are healthy and full of lovely Caribbean style flavours.

6 boneless skinless chicken thighs, each cut into 4 pieces 2 spring onions 1 handful flat leaf parsley 2 garlic cloves, chopped ¼ tsp cayenne pepper 3 tbsp lime juice 3 tbsp olive oil Lime Chilli Sauce 3 tbsp lime juice 2 tbsp olive oil 3 tbsp finely chopped flat leaf parsley 2 tsp finely chopped rosemary 1 large red chilli, finely chopped 4 spring onions, thinly sliced

At least 6 hours before cooking (or previous night) Put the chicken into a ceramic dish or bowl. Put spring onion, parsley, garlic, cayenne pepper, lime juice and olive oil into food processor; process to a paste.

Rub all over the chicken.

Cover and refrigerate for at least six hours or overnight.

40 minutes before cooking To make the lime chilli sauce, combine all ingredients in a bowl.

Pour over 125ml boiling water, stir to combine and set aside.

Soak some wooden skewers for 30 minutes.

Remove chicken from fridge 30 minutes before serving.

Thread chicken onto the skewers (three pieces on each).

Preheat BBQ grill to high.

Cook skewers for 8-10 minutes or until cooked through, turning often.

Spoon sauce over the skewers to serve.

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DIJON GRILLED PORK CHOPS

A delicious option to serve as part of your BBQ meal. Marinated for at least 8 hours (preferably overnight), these can be prepared the day before cooking. This succulent, sweet and tangy pork should be cooked quickly on the BBQ. Keep basting with the reserved marinade to ensure coverage while cooking.

6 tbsp Dijon mustard 6 tbsp brown sugar 3 tbsp apple juice 3 tbsp Worcestershire sauce 2 tbsp fresh ginger, grated 4 ‘bone in’ pork chops Mix mustard, brown sugar, apple juice and Worcestershire sauce together in a bowl until marinade is smooth.

Add grated ginger and stir to combine.

Pour two-thirds of the marinade into a large resealable plastic bag.

Add pork chops, coat with marinade,

HONEY MUSTARD KUMARA SALAD

This is a wonderful combination of kumara, corn, red onion, spinach and eggs lightly tossed in a honey mustard dressing.

800g kumara 2-3 cups frozen corn kernels 1 red onion, finely sliced 3 cups baby spinach 3 hard boiled eggs, peeled and quartered ½ cup honey mustard dressing (I use Eta Lite and Free)

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squeeze out excess air, and seal the bag.

Marinate in the refrigerator for 8 hours or overnight. Cover the bowl with the remaining marinade and refrigerate.

Remove pork chops from marinade.

Preheat grill for medium heat and lightly

Cook kumara in boiling water until tender, drain and set aside to cool.

Roughly chop and place in a serving dish.

Cook frozen corn kernels for 2-3 minutes in the microwave or saucepan until cooked.

Drain any excess water.

When kumara and vegetables are cold, toss gently together with onion, baby spinach and eggs.

Just before serving, toss through honey mustard dressing.

oil the grate.

Cook the pork chops on the preheated grill, basting with reserved marinade, until no longer pink in the centre (4-5 minutes per side).

Let pork stand for 5 minutes before serving.

TIP!

Potato can be substituted for the kumara and if preferred mesculin mix or rocket can replace the spinach.

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TOMATO AND CHEESE SALAD WITH BALSAMIC VINAIGRETTE

This salad is quick and simple to make, to provide an additional dish for your BBQ. Although it sounds extremely simple, it has wonderful flavours of tomatoes, onions, cheese and basil and will add a special element to your meal. Brown onions can be used if you don’t have red (however I much prefer red). You can choose from cheddar cheese, mozzarella or feta cheese, and if you are not keen on basil leaves, substitute these with parsley or rocket instead.

4 large tomatoes 1 small red onion, thinly sliced 250g cheddar, mozzarella or feta cheese, sliced (I prefer feta) 3-4 tbsp torn basil leaves Basil vinaigrette (I used Eta Balsamic Lite and Free)

CRUNCHY COLESLAW

This coleslaw combines edamame beans, carrots, red pepper, cabbage, ginger, crispy noodles and sesame seeds, brought together with a coleslaw dressing. This salad is delicious served with your choice of meat, chicken or fish. When toasting the sesame seeds spread over a tray under a preheated grill, but be sure to watch them as they can burn quickly.

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TIP!

On a platter arrange slices of tomatoes, onion rings, and cheese. Scatter over basil leaves and the drizzle generously with the balsamic vinaigrette.

Serve soon after making.

350g edamame beans – frozen 2 carrots – thinly sliced 1 red pepper – sliced thinly 4 cups finely shredded cabbage 1 tbsp minced ginger ½ cup coleslaw dressing – store bought (I use Eta) 140g packet crispy noodles 3 tbsp toasted sesame seeds

When toasting sesame seeds, spread over a tray under a preheated grill, but be sure to watch them as they can burn quickly.

Cook frozen edamame beans as per instructions on bag. Drain and set aside to cool.

In a bowl, toss together the cabbage, ginger, carrots, red pepper and cooled edamame beans.

Just before serving mix through the dressing and lastly the crispy noodles and sesame seeds.

www.carers.net.nz

The advert will be placed in the DISABILITY & MOBILITY PRODUCTS section

FamilyCARE A Versatile Power Chair

marketplace

Memorial Beads Custom Keepsakes - Treasured Memories

That’s Great For INDOORS & OUTDOORS or Fold it to TRAVEL

“Freedom Chair” A life changing Experience

Carry your loved one close to your heart by encasing ashes within an attractive piece of glass jewellery

Call Paul on: 0800 466 626 Email: paul@freedom-chair.nz Web: www.freedom-chair.nz

www.flameart.co.nz phone 027 3608153

Wheelchair Carrier Specialists INTERNAL LIFTS

Make life easier get yourself a LIFT

New design wheelchair carrier is a lot easier to use – is a ‘lighter’ version which is easy to carry and folds up when off the vehicle for easy storage. Has slide over towball lock with securing wing bolt.

$280 (Inc GST)

Freight Extra

POOL HOISTS

EXTERNAL LIFTS

Ph: (07) 867 6712 www.quinn.co.nz

Phone: 06 357 3255 Fax: 06 357 3696 77a Waldegrave Street, Palmerston North Email: tableau.towbars@inspire.net.nz www.tableau.co.nz

Young Carers NZ

Advert approved – ready to print

If you’re a young carer, or support young people in caring situations for SIGN Advert amendments required – no further proof required friends and family members, visit our Facebook page for day to day support!

Connect with other young carers, and receive regular information to amendments support Advert required – please send another proof you in your role. Schools and community organisations can request copies of our helpful free resource, Are You A Young Carer? We also produce an Disclaimer: Please note your advertisement will be placed in accordance with our paginat infosheet for anyone working with young carers and parents. this proof may differ from what is printed, due to colour calibration of software, screens a Request these resources by phoning Carers NZ on 0800Cervin 777 797 orLtd email Media 2A/47 Brown St, Ponsonby, Auckland 1021, PO Box 68450, Newton, Auck p: 09 360 8700 f: 09 360 8701 e: health@cervinmedia.co.nz centre@carers.net.nz Bulk booklets are available on request.

Young Carers NZ is a national programme of Carers NZ.

facebook.com/youngcarersnz WINTER 2015

Help for Kiwis

with extra needs

Road Trip Tips!

| ISSUE 35

just for you!

NEW ZEALAND E GIFTS GALOR BE IN TO WIN!

EMERGENCY?

Keep a journal!

S IMMUNISATION What jabs to when

have

RESPITE!

out Proactive time planning

NESTING

s Winter activitie

T HOME SUPPOR Who's it for?

HEALTHY MEALS !

Nourish yourself

NEW! 's Richard Fanselow column mobility travel

Reach 75,000+ readers per issue! To learn more, email centre@carers.net.nz or phone 0800 777 797.