Guy Magazine Issue 266 by Multi-Media Platforms

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December 24, 2014 #266

NICHOLAS BRENDON PG 28

THE WEEK PG 45

SCREEN SAVOR PG 54

Bobby Blair Founder, Multimedia Platforms Richard Hack Publisher / Editor-in-Chief 954-380-8563 x3103

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INTERVIEW

Nicholas Brendon Puts the Heart into Big Gay Love by

GreGG Shapiro

Photo courtesy of Big Gay Love Facebook

everyone knows actor Nicholas Brendon from his role as o Almost Xander on the beloved TV series Buffy The Vampire Slayer. As hot gay chef/caterer Andy in indie queer rom-com Big Gay Love (Canteen Outlaws), now available on DVD, Brendon adds a wonderful new part to his resumĂŠ of gay characters. When fit Andy falls for full-figured party-planner Bob (Jonathan Lisecki), they seem like the most unlikely of couples. But Andyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s attraction is the real thing and Bob, plagued by an abundance of issues, with body image near the top of the list, seems intent on grounding the relationship before it ever has a chance to take flight. 28

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Gregg Shapiro: I want to begin by offering my congratulations on your recent marriage. How is married life treating you so far? Nicholas Brendon: So far, so good. No complaints at all [laughs]. GS: In Big Gay Love, your character Andy is a restaurateur and caterer. Have you ever worked in the food service industry? NB: Yes, I have, but not in a chef’s capacity. I was the one that the chef was yelling at to get the food out faster. GS: Andy is also fond of Vietnamese banh mi sandwiches. Where do you stand on banh mis? NB: I love banh mi and I love pho. I love Vietnamese food. GS: Body image figures prominently in Big Gay Love, even for Andy who talks about how good it felt not to have to suck in his stomach when he felt fat, when he was with new love interest Bob. How do you feel about society’s ongoing obsession with body image? NB: I hate it. I believe that there are other worlds out there with human beings on them that have a higher spiritual level [laughs]. The whole body-shaming, like bullying, I don’t understand that mentality for people to be that unhappy with themselves. It bums me out. I wish people who had time on their hands to do that would find something better to do. I wish we lived a place where everybody loved everybody else, whether they were gay, Chinese, Vietnamese, black or whatever. GS: You appear shirtless in a couple of times in Big Gay Love, including the pool party scene and the love scene, exposing a tattoo on your shoulder and bicep. Is it yours or is it Andy’s? NB: It’s mine. The one on the outside of my arm are four angels. There are two archangel Michaels representing me and my twin brother. The two of other angels represent my little brothers Christian and Kyle. I’ve got share with us on guymag.net

Jesus surfing on the inside of my arm, just because I think it’s funny. GS: Trust becomes an issue for Bob and Andy. What do you think is the secret to establishing and maintaining trust in a relationship? NB: I think communication would be key. Talking about fears and not judging. And do a background check [laughs]. GS: Andy’s boots are a meaningful item of clothing for him. Do you have something in your closet that has special significance to you? NB: I own a lot of shoes. When I go to different cities and countries, I don’t really keep a diary, so I buy a pair of shoes. I’m going to Germany in December (2014) and I’ll get a pair of shoes there. I can look at all my shoes and let you know where I got them. GS: You previously played a gay character in Psycho Beach Party. Are you ever surprised when you find out an actor or actress has issues playing a queer character? NB: I’m more saddened when I hear that an actor won’t play a character because of their religious beliefs. That always bums me out. It goes back to the acceptance of everyone. People who won’t play a gay character because they think it’s a sin. That makes me sick to my stomach. I do not feel that way. GS: And we thank you for that. You have a twin brother named Kelly. What is the best part of being a twin? NB: I can have him try on clothes that I want to buy and see how they are going to fit me [laughs]. GS: Have you started work on any new film or TV projects? NB: I have two coming up. I did a web series for the Nerdist called The Real Housewives of Horror. I think that’s out right now. I also starred in a TV show for MTV called Faking It. I did the last episode last year and we go back into production in December (2014). I play a way-out-there art teacher. So I go from being in high school in Buffy to teaching high school. Where do the years go [laughs]? theguymag

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BARTENDER OF THE WEEK

Aaron Adams Mixology with Muscle by

Cliff Dunn

o I wouldn’t exactly say that seeing Aaron Adams incites your “fight or flight” response (granted, there are probably a few other responses that he incites at first glance, but that’s my business). At first blush, it’s possible to think that the friendly and popular bartender at Hunters Fort Lauderdale nightclub would take your head off as soon as pour you a cold one, but then he flashes you a smile and engages you with his warm personality and charm, and that’s when you know (hope?) that things will turn out all right. For all that at only 32 years old, the rugged Adams has chalked up an impressive catalog of life experiences. Right out of school, he enlisted in the United States Marine Corps, where he was trained as an aviation electrician, and stationed in San Diego, California. “I didn’t really like it that much— the electrician part,” Adams admits. “I loved getting to travel and see different places, which was fun.” After five years serving his country in the Marines, Adams returned to his native Kentucky to attend the University of Louisville, where he majored in finance. In 2009, he set his sights on a warmer climate. “The first time I came to South Florida, I loved everything about it,” Adams says. “The beaches, the weather, the people—I loved it so much I moved down. I had no specific plan, but I found an apartment online, and I moved here. “It was a pretty risky move,” the Suds Stud acknowledges, “but it has been fantastic. How cool is that?” Briefly distracted by the sight of biceps (both of them), I stipulate that it is in fact cool. During a four-year tour slinging drinks at Casablanca Café on Fort Lauderdale Beach, Adams took his mystique and muscles to a

public platform, becoming a brand model for South Florida-based Ruff Rider Clothing. “It was a good fit,” he says without irony. In the fall, Adams left the beach for the Gayborhood, coming to bartend at Hunters, the former Boom (and sometimes Atomic), working mostly weekends as well other shifts. He enjoys the move, as well as the regular customers and staffers with whom he works. And when he isn’t at work? “I love being home, waking up late, and getting up to stretch, then taking a jog. When I get home, I will make some breakfast, do some yard work, or go to the gym, and then later get together with friends.” Lucky guys (I hate them already). Five years from now, Adams sees himself enjoying life and his lifestyle. “I want to enjoy myself, have

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fun, keep the party going,” he says with a smile that’s just this side of Mortal Sin. As a drink to impress, Aaron says he recommends “Maker’s Mark on the rocks with a splash of water. A fan of Bourbon, is he? He laughs. “Well, like me, it’s from Kentucky, it’s also delicious and warms you up on a cold winter night.” Like the weather we are having now (sort of). As well as working at Hunters, he manages the Coral Reef Guest House (okay, so he hasn’t entirely left the beach behind), and sees that as a springboard for greater things to come. “I’d like to use my experience at Coral Reef and elsewhere to get into some corporate, something a little more permanent. I won’t be 32 forever.” We can always dream, Aaron.

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BAR MAP 38

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12) LE PATIO 2401 NE 11th Ave Wilton Manors

13) LIPS 1421 E Oakland Park Blvd Oakland Park

14) THE MANOR 2345 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors

15) MONA’S 502 E Sunrise Blvd Fort Lauderdale

8) HUNTERS NIGHTCLUIB 2232 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors

9) INFINITY LOUNGE 2184 WIlton Drive Wilton Manors

10) JMARK’S 1245 N Federal Hwy Fort Lauderdale

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3) BOARDWALK 1721 N Andrews Ave Fort Lauderdale

4) CORNER PUB 1915 N Andrews Ave Wilton Manors

5) CUBBY HOLE 823 N Federal Hwy Fort Lauderdale

2) BILL’S FILLING STATION 2209 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors

7) GREGARIOUS 2033 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors

11) JOHNNY’S 1116 W Broward Blvd Fort Lauderdale

6) DAPUR 1620 N Federal Hwy Fort Lauderdale

1) ALIBI 2266 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors

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19) PJ’S CORNER POCKET 2340 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors

18) NEW YORK GRILLED CHEESE 2207 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors

17) NAKED GRAPE 2163 Wilton Drive Wilton manors

16) MONKEY BUSINESS 2740 N Andrews Ave Fort Lauderdale

26) SIDELINES 2031 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors 27) SMARTY PANTS 2400 E Oakland Park Blvd Fort Lauderdale 23) RUMORS BAR & GRILL 2426 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors

25) SCARFONE’S 2150 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors

24) SCANDALS SALOON 3073 NE 6th Ave Wilton Manors

22) ROSIE’S BAR & GRILL 2449 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors

21) RAMROD 1508 NE 4th Ave Fort Lauderdale

20) PROGRESS 2440 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors

31) VILLAGE PUB 2283 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors

30) TROPICS 2000 Wilton Drive Wilton Manors

29) 13 I EVEN 2037 Wilton Dr Wilton Manors

28) THE STABLE 205 E Oakland Park Blvd Fort Lauderdale

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THE WEEK

Mame, Swan Lake, and New Year’s Eve BY

Swan Lake (courtesy of the State Ballet Theater of Russia)

PATRICK ROBERT

_________________ _________________ Thursday

12/25

Friday

12/26

Mame

Year in Music Review – The Manor

o For Christmas Day, why not celebrate it with everybody’s favorite boozy aunt, Mame? The classic musical includes the hit songs “We Need a Little Christmas,” “Bosom Buddies,” “If He Walked into My Life,” “It’s Today,” and the title song. Beloved veteran Broadway, film, and television actress Leslie Uggams stars in the Wick Theatre’s production. Eccentric bohemian Mame Dennis lives an indulgent life in which “life’s a banquet” until her nephew shows up to live with her. The two form a unique relationship during the Great Depression. 2:00 p.m. Wick Theatre. 7901 N. Federal Highway. Boca Raton. 33487.

o 2014 was a rather interesting year in music. Not only did Taylor Swift switch genres and then scoff at Spotify, but Beyonce’s surprise 2013 album also lit up the charts, along with openly gay singer Sam Smith’s ubiquitous hit “Stay With Me.” Nicki Minaj continued her success with the hit single “Anaconda,” Iggy Azalea became a household name, and “Weird” Al Yankovic posted his first number one album ever. All in all it was a great year for music, so the Manor will be celebrating all of the greatest hits with tonight’s Bubble Gum Friday party. 11:00 p.m. Manor. 2345 Wilton Drive. Wilton Manors. 33305.

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THE WEEK Marvin Dixon’s Christmas Spectacular o Former Miami radio morning show personality Marvin Dixon hosts a Christmas Spectacular full of humor. The popular host has performed with D.L. Hughley and has also appeared on HBO’S Def Comedy Jam and BET’s Comic View. The headliner for the night is Tyler Perry alumnus Cocoa Brown. She plays Jennifer in the sitcom Tyler Perry’s For Better or Worse. Her resume includes parts on Breaking Bad, 2 Broke Girls, and The Soul Man. Tonight the two tell jokes celebrating the holidays. 8:00 p.m. Fort Lauderdale Improv. 5700 Seminole Way. Hollywood. 33314.

_________________ Saturday

12/27

Swan Lake o Thanks to Darren Aronofsky’s groundbreaking and riveting 2010 film Black Swan, Tchaikovsky’s most famous ballet may now always be synonymous with psychological dysfunction. Either way, the ballet remains the premiere piece for any troupe. A company of fifty dancers will be presenting the full-scale production. The story revolves around a young prince named and his destructive relationship with Swan princess Odette. What follows is a tale of obsessive love, ending in death and suicide. The State Ballet Theater of Russia will perform this lavish production. 3:00 p.m. Miramar Cultural Center. 2400 Civic Center Place. Miramar. 33025.

Forbidden Broadway o Forbidden Broadway has been a staple of the musical theater scene since its first revue performance back in 1982. Conceived, written and directed by Gerard Alessandrini, the show pokes fun at the current Broadway sampling. This year’s incarnation aims its daggers at Pippin, Rocky, Matilda, and The Book of Mormon. Hilarious spoofing, outrageous costumes, and dead-on impressions make this a can’t-miss for any serious theater aficionado. 7:30 p.m. Kravis Center for the Performing Arts. 701 Okeechobee Blvd. West Palm Beach. 33401.

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THE WEEK __________ Sunday

12/28

Shen Yun Performing Arts o Last year the Shen Yun Performing Arts was a huge success in Broward County. It returns celebrating classical Chinese dance and music, including grand processions, ethnic music, and folk dances. Most of the performances honor heroes of ancient and modern times. The NYC-based dance company expresses the essence of 500 years of Chinese culture, which it asserts has all but been demolished by the Chinese Communist government. 8:00 p.m. Broward Center for the Performing Arts. 201 SW Fifth Ave. Fort Lauderdale. 33312.

Shen Yun 12/28

(Courtesy of Shen Yun Performing Arts)

_________________ Monday

12/29

Kier Spates o Kier Spates is considered one of the funniest comedians on tour. He has traveled the globe with such greats as Aretha Franklin, Lyfe Jennings, Frankie Beverly, and Anita Baker. In 2005 he was one of the primary acts on the Rickey Smiley and Friends Show. His best-known work may be from his television appearances on shows like Comic View and Getting Paid. He is also a regular contributor to The Steve Harvey Morning Show. Tonight he will be performing his celebrated stand-up material. 8:00 p.m. Palm Beach Improv. 550 S. Rosemary Ave. West Palm Beach. 33401.

_________________ Tuesday

12/30

Boys Noize o Electronic music producer and DJ Boys Noize is known for his popular remixed work. He has had success with remixes of such diverse artist as David Lynch, Depeche Mode, Snoop Dogg, Daft Punk, and The Chemical Brothers. He has share with us on guymag.net

also been involved in a side project called Dog Blood with notorious, world famous DJ Skrillex. Dog Blood performed at Ultra Music Festival two years ago. A regular music festival performer, Boys Noize will be performing at Grand Central tonight. 11:00 p.m. Grand Central. 697 N. Miami Ave. Miami. 33136.

_________________ Wednesday

12/31

New Year’s Eve on The Drive o Wilton Drive will be bumping on New Year’s Eve as a mass of bars and clubs host New Year’s Eve parties. Hunter’s is celebrating the New Year with its Studio 54 themed party. Guests are invited to dress up like any of their favorite Studio 54 celebrities—Andy Warhol, Brook Shields, Grace Jones, Groucho Marx, or even Liza Minelli. Progress Bar is throwing their first Masquerade Ball. Tickets are $55 pre-sale and $65 the day of the event. The night includes a premium open bar and complimentary champagne toast at midnight. Various other events will be happening at Alibi, The Drive, and Village Pub. Ringing in the New Year is sure to be a worthy experience in Wilton Manors. Various Times. Wilton Drive. Wilton Manors. 33305. theguymag

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Christmas Dinner in the Hood by

Michael Davis

because it’s Christmas and all your friends with cooking skills have o Just left town doesn’t mean that you’re without alternatives to eat and celebrate. We’ve collected a list of tempting places in the Gayberhood that are serving up turkey and other traditional Christmas feasts. Just remember to save room for dessert and a ho ho ho with your special someone. SHAWN AND NICK’S COURTYARD CAFÉ (2211 Wilton Drive, Wilton Manors, FL 33305) Your favorite café is serving a turkey dinner all day long. Expect traditional stuffing, cranberry sauce, soap or salad, mashed potatoes or rice, vegetables and dessert. All for $12.95. From 5 p.m. to 11 p.m., Courtyard is serving a thick rib eye steak with all the fixings ($12.95) or choose a Greek Oven-Roasted Lamb dinner for $15.95. It’s certain to attract the big boys, so keep your eyes peeled.

HOBO’S GRILL AT RUMORS (2426 Wilton Drive, Wilton Manors, FL 33305) Hobo’s pulls out all the stops for its annual Holiday Sunday Brunch Buffet. So it’s not actually on Christmas, it’s close enough. The traditional holiday buffet features Carved Ham, Pot Roast, Macaroni and Cheese, Scalloped Potatoes, Belgian Waffles, Shrimp Cocktail and a made-to-order Omelet. It also includes a Bloody Mary or Mimosa (which they think is a Minosa). Deck your halls for $14.50 from 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. share with us on guymag.net

B. BAR AND GRILLE (2209 Wilton Drive, Wilton Manors, FL 33305) The former Bill’s Filling Station has undergone a transformation in the new B. Bar and Grille. Check it out on Christmas (they open at 4 p.m.). B. Bar will be serving a complimentary Christmas buffet beginning at 5:30 p.m. You can’t beat free, or the sizzling hot music.

BEEFCAKE’S GRILL (1721 North Andrews Avenue, Fort Lauderdale, FL 33311) If your Christmas plans call for cruising, there is no better place to dine than at the Boardwalk’s eatery, Beefcake’s Grill. On Christmas, the decorations will be up and the strippers will be circling the bar and dancing their buns off. A traditional Christmas buffet of Roast Turkey and Roast Pork with stuffing, mashed potatoes and gravy, housemade cranberry sauce, buttered corn, steamed carrots, plus salad and pumpkin pie. All of which designed to make your mouth water for a mere $19.95. Or buy a Holiday Rewards Card and get dinner on the house. theguymag

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TRAVEL

Don’t Go There! By Rick kaRlin

Next time before you travel, not only might you want to check your passport, you might want to check the news. While same-sex marriage and LGBT rights have made tremendous advances in some parts of the world, in other areas it might as well be the Dark Ages. Uganda’s Supreme Court may have overturned a virulently anti-gay bill, but the country’s, president, Yoweri Museveni, has pledged to introduce a new version of the bill in which LGBT people could face life in jail. Nigeria and Kenya are even more discriminatory, with homosexual activity punishable by death in certain Nigerian states and LGBT organizations banned nationwide. The Winter Olympics brought Russia’s antigay stance to the national stage. Once the Olympics were over many people forgot about it, but the discrimination continues. There are reports documenting persecution and attacks on LGBT people by hate groups. Things are pretty much the same in the Ukraine, with the government considering similar legislation against, as they put it, “the propaganda of homosexuality.” Countries in Asia vary from totally accepting to strongly anti-LGBT. Japan and Thailand are on the positive side, but countries such as Malaysia and Indonesia (and other heavily Islamic countries), are anything but welcoming for the LGBT community there. Last year India’s Supreme Court reversed a lower court order that decriminalized gay sex, however, gay life can be found in larger cities in India, such as Mumbai. Many smaller Indian communities and neighboring countries such as Bangladesh, Sri Lanka, Nepal, Bhutan and the Maldives are all virulently discriminatory. The Middle East, with the exception of Israel and Lebanon, are among the worst places in the world for LGBT people. In Saudi Arabia, homosexuality is punished with public whipping or even the death penalty. Of course, we all remember that in 2007, Iran’s President Ahmadinejad declared that homosexuality did not exist in his country, but just in case, laws are in place that call for whippings

Mumbai, India (J. Juncadella)

or death. In Afghanistan, the death penalty introduced under the Taliban is no longer officially enforced, but how you are treated depends on who catches you. Egypt and Yemen are almost as bad and “the ‘Stans” (Kazakhstan, Kyrgyzstan and Pakistan), which bridge the Middle East with Central Asia, are pretty dismal as well. However, you can find gay bars in the cities of Almaty in Kazakhstan and Bishkek in Kyrgyzstan, but keep it on the DL. In Latin America many countries are open and welcoming to LGBT people. Argentina has led the way in equality laws and major cities such as Rio de Janeiro and Buenos Aires have strong LGBT communities and parts of

Mexico are very pro-LGBT, but other countries and smaller towns are not so accepting. Closer to home, in Jamaica the mantra is “Don’t worry, be happy…,” just don’t be gay. LGBT individuals are always in danger of violence, whether natives or tourists, some of whom have been beaten to death. Other Caribbean countries vary greatly from gay marriage being legal in the British Virgin Islands, a strong LGBT community in the U.S. Virgins to places such as The Cayman Islands which have refused all gay cruises. My mother always said to end on a positive note, so let’s talk about the welcoming countries. The Spartacus International Gay Guide recently ranked every country on LGBT share with us on guymag.net

friendliness. It named Sweden the most LGBT friendly for its anti-discrimination laws, recognition of gay unions, LGBT travel marketing and no institutional persecution. Rounding out the top five spots are; Belgium, France, The Netherlands and the United Kingdom tied for second, Canada, Denmark, Iceland and Uruguay tied for third, New Zealand and Norway tied for fourth, while Spain, Austria and Germany tied for fifth. It should be noted that the U.S. ranked 38th because of anti-gay laws and lack of marriage equality in some areas of the country. We tied with Aruba, Bulgaria, Cambodia, Croatia, Curacao, Hungary, Italy, Mexico and Thailand. theguymag

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SCREEN SAVOR

Into Imitation by

GreGG Shapiro

The Imitation Game (TWC) is one of those movies based on a true story that makes you wonder why it hasn’t been told on the big screen in this way before now. However, the timing of the release of the film, coming as it does at a time when horrific interrogation techniques utilized by the CIA are coming to light. In other words, intelligence has nothing to do with intelligence, let alone humanity. Moving back and forth in time, from 1928 to 1951, The Imitation Game tells the alternately heartbreaking and heart-racing story of brilliant mathematician and Enigma code cracker Alan Turing (Benedict Cumberbatch in an Oscar-worthy performance), a tortured genius utterly lacking in basic social skills (almost the blueprint for Big Bang Theory’s Sheldon). Beginning in 1951, following an unfortunate altercation with a gay hustler, Turing, relegated to being a secret hero of World War II for his work that resulted in bringing down the Germans, is about to become the latest victim of Britain’s Victorian attitudes toward homosexuals and acts of “gross indecency.” Before that, Turing tells his story to a police detective following his arrest, beginning with his time at Bletchley Radio Manufacturing where he is employed, starting in 1939, under the watchful eyes of Commander Denniston (Charles Dance) and MI6 chief Stewart Menzies (Mark Strong). Teamed up with Hugh Alexander (Matthew Goode) and others, Turing creates a “universal machine,” that he describes as an “electrical brain” (a precursor to the modern computer) that will aid him in his code-breaking work. His life at school in the late `20s, where he fell in love with classmate Christopher (Jack Bannon), also provides essential background into how Turing became the man he was. Accept no imitations, The Imitation Game is one the best biopics of the year.

The moral/message of the beloved Tony Award-winning Stephen Sondheim/ James Lapine Broadway musical fable Into The Woods (Disney), which takes loving liberties with fairy tales such as Cinderella, Rapunzel, Little Red Riding Hood and Jack and

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Into the Woods (Photo by Peter Mountain / Courtesy of Disney)

the Beanstalk, is be careful what you wish for. Sadly, that applies to fans of the musical that wished for a movie version of Into The Woods and got Rob Marshall’s Disney dud. A childless baker and his wife (James Corden and Emily Blunt, respectively), the fairy tale created by Sondheim and Lapine to link all the stories together, wish to have a child. The witch (Meryl Streep) next door, who placed the infertility curse on the baker’s father and house, and by extension the baker, agrees to reverse the curse if the baker and his wife are able to bring her a milky white cow (Jack and the Beanstalk), a golden (not glass) slipper (Cinderella), a blood red cape (Little Red Riding Hood) and hair yellow as corn (Rapunzel) in three days’ time. Not surprisingly, the other characters all have wishes, too. For example, Cinderella (Anna theguymag

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Kendrick) wishes to go the king’s festival, but her widowed wicked stepmother (Christine Baranski) and stepsisters (Lucy Punch and Tammy Blanchard) have other plans for her. Jack (Daniel Huttleston, channeling Jack Wild in Oliver!) wishes his beloved cow would give milk, but since it won’t, his mother (Tracey Ullman) insists he take it to the village and sell it. Red Riding Hood (Lilla Crawford) wishes for bread for her poor old grandmother living in the woods and Rapunzel (Mackenzie Mauzy) wishes for company in the tower in which the witch has imprisoned her. The witch also has a wish – to be returned her formerly beautiful self, before the baker’s father stole her magic beans. As these assorted characters begin to cross and re-cross paths in order to make their wishes come true, they encounter a wolf (Johnny Depp), a pair of hot prince brothers (Chris share with us on guymag.net

Pine and Billy Magnussen), and ultimately the vengeful and destructive widowed wife (Frances de la Tour) of the giant. There are themes of contentment and discontent, and hints that there will be no happily ever after. Considered by some to be an AIDS allegory (the giant brought to the village by Jack is killing everyone and blame is on everyone’s mind), Into The Woods is as much about being in the woods as it is getting out of the woods. Bogged down by leftover less-than-special effects from Maleficent (at least it’s not in 3D), Into The Woods is better than Mamma Mia! in that the performances, especially Blunt, Kendrick and Streep, and, in particular, Pine’s campy, over-the-top portrayal of the prince (the “Agony” number, a duet with Magnussen, is the closest thing to a showstopper), occasionally distract from the flaws. theguymag

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HEAR ME OUT

Mary J. Blige, Carrie Underwood by

Chris AzzopArdi

MARY J. BLIGE, THE LONDON SESSIONS o Nobody was sensing Mary J. Blige needed a change more than Mary J. Blige. To reinvent her sound, which she says was going “stagnant,” the “No More Drama” singer embarked on a journey to London for a few weeks, locking herself away with some of the hottest British musicians: Disclosure, Emeli Sandé, Naughty Boy and Sam Smith. The result is The London Sessions, a turning point for an artist who, throughout her 20-plusyear career, has prided herself on being the Queen of Hip-Hop Soul. Blige, however, doesn’t completely abandon her What’s the 411? roots – she expands them. Here, her usual musical catharsis is, in many ways, at its most intimate, but when Blige gets crunk at the clubs – letting beat-makers du jour turn her into the disco diva we’ve always secretly wanted her to be – it’s especially apparent she’s taking worthwhile risks. “Pick Me Up” taps Naughty Boy for a lounge-y clarinet-adorned dance groove, Craze & Hoax bring in the boom during the spirited “Long Hard Look” and the Rodney Jerkins-produced house anthem “My Love,” though substandard by comparison, also grants Blige welcome vitality. Even when she pours her heart out on big ballad “Not Loving You,” co-penned by Smith, the influence of her time spent abroad is evident. With its simple melody, the piano-led torch song is like hearing Mary J. Blige sing for the first time. Grade: B+ CARRIE UNDERWOOD, GREATEST HITS: DECADE #1 o Like most American Idol grads, Carrie Underwood was so painfully play-it-safe in the days after her

challenging herself not just vocally but also artistically, Decade #2 won’t need any other hands on the wheel but her own. Grade: B-

Also Out

2005 victory that someone, be it Jesus or not, needed to take that wheel. Whether it was the Man Above or a label head or simply the pressure from the more-musicallyfearless Miranda Lambert, mawkish songs about Him, patriotism and her mom would, thankfully, lessen. There would be more grit. More cheatin’ tunes. And most importantly, there would be an evolution. The two-disc, 25-track Greatest Hits: Decade #1 chronicles Underwood’s trajectory from Idol on, as the vanilla girl with a voice turned into a singing superstar with staying power. One of two new tunes, “Something in the Water,” for instance, is in the vein of “Jesus, Take the Wheel” – both are contemporary Christian songs about healing – but its production is more Kings of Leon than Rascal Flatts. On “Little Toy Gun,” a rhythmic drum punch and fiery vocals set the scene for a domestic abuse narrative, which emphasizes an edge Underwood’s really only revealed since 2012’s Blown Away, her creative breakthrough. Playing against type, bad-girl kiss-off “Before He Cheats,” also included on the set, still reigns as one of her best singles. And a career pinnacle – singing “How Great Thou Art” live with Vince Gill in 2011 – soars all the way to the heavens. If Underwood continues down this road,

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CALVIN HARRIS, MOTION o Nu-disco wasn’t the same when Calvin Harris and Rihanna brought “We Found Love” into our lives. But on his fourth studio album, Motion, the DJ’s throw-downs need to find more than love – they need to find originality. Squandering his proven knack for original electro-pop is a derivative array of Zumba-made EDM, like “Open Wide,” featuring Big Sean innuendo. Harris’ collaboration with HAIM on “Pray to God” invigorates, as do a few other songs (see “Ecstasy”), but for the most part, Motion is in one very hopeless place. HAERTS, HAERTS o On the eponymous debut of Haerts, a Brooklyn band formed while studying at the Iceland Academy of the Arts, glistening synths and ’80s-inspired riffs are full of empty promises. Alluring on the surface, the foursome’s ultimate vision fails to expand the notion of new wave, trapping itself within the genre’s most basic tropes and feeding off a tried-and-true formula. There’s clearly talent here – Nini Fabi’s evocative vocal prowess is clearly a valuable asset – but for Haerts’ follow-up, let’s hope they find a way to put it to good use.

Chris Azzopardi is the editor of Q Syndicate, the international LGBT wire service. Reach him via his website at www.chris-azzopardi.com.

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PUZZLE

They Died in the Closet

ACROSS 1 Bankhead’s home, for short 5 Pesky kid 9 Fruit peel in a drink 14 Russian river 15 Luau dance 16 Path finder 17 Make a hole bigger 18 Exotica director Egoyan 19 Hostile state 20 Star of the 1925 silent version of Ben-Hur 23 “It’s ___ for Me to Say” (Mathis) 24 Jazz singer James 25 Tax preparer, for short 28 Hollywood Rock 31 Katharine of Sylvia Scarlett 33 White or rose alternative 34 Disney’s ___ and the Detectives 36 “Holy cow!” 37 Alan of And the Band Played On 39 Said with a sneer 42 Shore opening

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43 Elton John wears them 45 Constellation bear 47 Adjective for Abner 48 Norman Bates portrayer Anthony 51 Civil rights advocate Barbara 53 NFL gains 54 “___ I say ...” 56 Gaza Stripper assn. 57 Cross-dresser of the FBI 62 How sailors come 65 Lord of the Rings singer 66 Care beginning 67 Fruity-smelling compound 68 Six-pointer, sometimes 69 Cry of mock horror 70 It may arouse you in the sack 71 Collette of The Hours 72 “There Is Nothing Like a ___” DOWN 1 Perry Mason star Raymond 2 Kind of code or rug 3 Word to a dominatrix theguymag

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4 Marc of pop music 5 Erik of the opera, and others 6 Station wagon, e.g. 7 “___ Paris” 8 Football great Joe 9 Word after conversion 10 Otis of Mayberry, for one 11 Dick’s running mate 12 Sch. for Rev. Spahr 13 Take a stab at 21 Narrow margin 22 No. 6 to P-town 25 Top of St. Peter’s 26 Conductor AndrÈ 27 Gay porn director Rainier 28 Gave a hand 29 Milk sources 30 Henry and June’s Anais 32 Flick it 33 Like Harvey Fierstein’s voice 35 Lucy of Charlie’s Angels 38 Comics outburst 40 Erving, to fans 41 Places for really deep throating? 44 Pull it out and shoot it off 46 Alice’s Restaurant patron 49 Show agreement 50 Least foolish 52 Like The Bard’s star-cross’d lovers 55 Holy, to Jose 57 Give a hoot, literally 58 Idol of porn 59 Don Diego de la ___ (Zorro) 60 Red rind contents 61 Sally who rode into space 62 Actress named Arthur 63 Big initials in fashion 64 B&O stop

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BUSINESS FEATURE

To the Moon Marketplace Talk About Your Childhood Wishes Antonio Dumas (Photos courtesy of the City of Wilton Manors)

Cliff Dunn

“I told my friends, ‘Don’t call me a candy store!’” This is how Antonio Dumas—who owns one of the Gayborhood’s most popular (ahem) candy stores—tells the story of how he came to open To the Moon Marketplace. Just don’t call it a candy store. As he gets ready to celebrate 10 years in the same location on Wilton Drive, Dumas is filled with energy and enthusiasm (and maybe a few pieces of chocolate—but who can blame him?) about his and To the Moon’s prospects for the next decade. His journey—and that of the store which bears a kitschy and catchy name—begins, ironically, by bus. “My parents are named Ralph and Alice, just like the ‘Cramdens’ on The Honeymooners,” Dumas explains. “Like them, we are also from Brooklyn.

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“My sister’s husband worked at the Brooklyn bus depot, which just so happens to be called the ‘Jackie Gleason Bus Depot’. This was all a little too much for me, so when I went into business for myself, I called my store ‘To the Moon.’ “It’s the perfect name for a place that has some of the greatest stuff under the Moon.” Dumas moved to South Florida 20 years ago, and much of his expertise in specialty products came from his years spent working on South Beach running a gourmet food market. “When I first came to Fort Lauderdale, I wanted to open a boutique market that sold specialty foods,” Dumas acknowledges. “In Miami and South Beach, people love that. In Fort Lauderdale, that didn’t fly—they went right for the candy,” he laughs. “But I insisted to my friends that we weren’t a candy store.” Still, if you can’t beat ’em, join ’em. Besides, most people would agree that Dumas has theguymag

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found his sweet spot (hey, these jokes practically write themselves). To the Moon Marketplace is one of the most eclectic—and fun—shops in South Florida. Inside, you will find an extraordinary array of products, including nostalgic candy and, yep, gourmet foods. “We sell wines, cheese, pâtés, novelties, greeting cards, and lots more,” Dumas says. “I love what we have to offer our customers.” To each of those customers, Dumas and his day manager, William—with whom he credits much of his store’s success—offer charming, personal service, and a kind word about every purchase. They also send every customer out the door with a friendly suggestion to “Have a sweet day (or night).” To the Moon stocks goods from over 60 countries, with the attraction arguably being the vast selection of nostalgic candy from days gone by. Or it could be Dumas himself, and the enthusiasm he transfers to each guest he meets. “I love sharing stories with my customers about their childhood experiences with candy,” he explains. “You would be amazed how someone’s face lights up when he explains that he was chewing such-and-such a piece of gum when he got his first kiss—and we stock it on our shelves.” There’s real charm at play as Dumas explains his love for the merchandise, which includes edibles as well as collectibles, including lunchboxes, glassware, clothing, and many other items that invoke a simpler time. “This is true Americana,” Dumas says with pride and a childlike sense of joy. It’s contagious. “One of our keys to success is that we stock many items from all over the country and all over the world. People who lived in other parts of the US come here and years later they see a piece of candy they haven’t had since they were kids. The same is true if they’ve been overseas and only seen certain products elsewhere—until they come inside To the Moon and find it here.” share with us on guymag.net

Much of the merchandise at To the Moon is imported directly from overseas, including delicious chocolates from over 50 countries. The shop stocks both famous hard-to-find candy as well as bulk candy, with products whose pedigrees date back over 100 years. In addition, there are over 13,000 different items—edible and otherwise—that include British Crisps, German Pretzels, Dutch Wafers, Real Haribo from Germany, Bonomo Taffy, classic toys made of tin and wood, robots, lunchboxes, collectibles (from Betty Boop and Elvis, to I Love Lucy, the Wizard of Oz, and more), over 2,000 greeting cards for all ages—and that’s really just for starters. Bang-zoom, to the moon: Ralph and Alice would be proud. “We have something that appeals to everybody,” Dumas says, and it isn’t bragging if it’s true. Unlike many sugar free and low carb candy and confection products, the ones on Antonio’s shelves actually taste great. Dumas also takes pride in the fact that many of his items have won the NASFT (National Association Specialty Food Trade) Award, which he says is “like winning an Oscar.” Each month, To the Moon holds a product giveaway, which includes gift baskets, certificates, and the like. Dumas also enjoys holding tastings, and if you have questions about a product, just ask—there may be a sample in it for you. Dumas credits much of his outlook and success to his mother. “She’s the reason I’m strong,” he offers. Where does he see himself in another five years? “Hopefully right here,” says Dumas. “I’ve been told that I should open another store, or franchise, but the truth is I love what I am doing, and I love where I am doing it. I love my customers, I love my job—how many other people do you know who can say that?” Who else but Antonio Dumas, the Candy Man? theguymag

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