FM Spotlight Magazine October

LIT & RED JUMPSUIT APPARATUS

THE

ON #19 NEILS

INTERVIEWS

HALLOWEEN

ACRES OF TERROR

(ARE YOU BRAVE ENOUGH?)

N

(YOU NAME IT, WE GOT IT!)

DA

FAMILY, THEATRE, LIVE MUSIC!

JOR

GUIDES

DINING

RHOMBUS GUYS

+

(WHIPPING PIZZA INTO SHAPE)

THE KARAOKE QUEEN

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FREE OCTOBER ‘11

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QUESTION

Hey Guys!

I need some sage advice and maybe it’s more words of encouragement maybe, but I’m a girl that’s been dealing with self-image issues due to my weight for a looong time. That being said, I really like this guy and I don’t think he even knows I exist! My friends are a help, but I’d really like to hear your opinions as well.

Thanks, Beth

Get your questions answered at www.1079thefox.com and www.froggyweb.com

HE

SAID

Dave from 107.9 The Fox

Helllo Beth!

I hear you sister! I too dealt with self-esteem issues for SO long with my weight and health, yo-yo dieting etc...been there...done it many times over. Here is the best advice I can lay on you sweetheart...learn to love yourself! I know it sounds like Polly-Anna advice, but its true! Make friends with yourself, and sure enough, toot-sweet the rest will fall into place like dominoes! If you feel better about yourself, it WILL shine out to others and that spark your hoping for will fire off like a brand new shiny platinum tipped spark plug! (The good kind that you want to buy but the cheap ones are the ones you go home with.) Sounds like a country song... Good luck, and happy hunting!

SHE

SAID

AMANDA FROM FROGGY 99.9

Hey Beth,

I think everyone deals with self-image issues no matter how pretty, skinny, fat or ugly you may think you are!

I am a strong believer in …there is a person out there for everyone and if you wait long enough you will find it. I know that sounds totally cliché, but it’s true. I don’t want to judge this guy, but I wouldn’t go out of your way to try and impress him. Be YOU and only YOU, if he digs you great if not….Move on to the next guy! Sooo many fish in the sea and there will be someone who thinks you are perfect just the WAY YOU ARE! (insert Bruno Mars “Just The Way You Are” here please) Ha! Now that songs is such in your head. Chin up and SMILE! Wait…Did Dave and I just agree on something?

THE Q REVIEW

CHEAP HALLOWEEN COSTUME ADVICE:

USUALLY, I’M GETTING ASKED “HEY SPARKS, YOU’RE A CHEAP BASTARD...GOT ANY IDEAS ON A HALLOWEEN COSTUME FOR ME?” FIRST OF ALL, I’M OFFENDED...BY YOU NOT ASKING ME THIS SOONER. LET ME REVIEW 3 CHEAP-ASS HALLOWEEN COSTUMES FOR THIS MONTH’S Q- REVIEW.

#1

GUY STUCK IN A TORNADO.

This is by far the most attention grabbing costume of the fall season. It’s so good, that I might be able to convince some exchange student that it’s the new fall fashion. “There goes Bjorn, he must dress like this after growing up in his native land of Wind-gola.”

This costume is simple, all you need to do is staple news papers to you and gel your hair to one side. If you have a tie, just staple that to one side of your shirt and walk around as if you’re leaning into the wind. BOOM-TASTIC COSTUME!

#2

THE TYPICAL “I’M A FAT GUY AND I NEED TO HIDE MY FAT” COSTUME. Halloween is the one time of year you get to turn your body into an optical illusion! This is how you turn yourself into the “David Copperfield of Halloween fat hiding” to pick up chicks (without the whole “let me take you to my island, where nobody will hear your screams” part). The trick here is to design your costume around popular

fat people/round objects. Examples: Stay Puft Marshmallow man, Michelin Man, a magic 8 ball, the Octomom, or Chaz Bono...any of these will work!

Just take any of these ideas and run... uhh...maybe not “run,” but walk heavily like you’re used to.

#3

THE MOST INTERESTING MAN IN THE WORLD. No, No, NO, not talking about me here. (I’m too beautiful) We’re talking

about the Dos Equis guy. It’s an easy costume that’s mostly comprised of clothes you wear to Easter at Grandma’s/Yachting club. Now you’re all like “Sparkmaster Sparks, this is too easy, there’s going to be tons of people going as the Dos Equis guy.” Before I start, I just want to say thank you for using my birth name. Now, don’t you worry your little sports jacket off...I’ve thought of plan B. It involves you wearing the exact same thing when you go out, but then you hit them with this - “You’re going to like the way you look, I guarantee it.” BOOM!!

Costume Bomb has been dropped!!

They’re not going to know what hit them! They thought you were the Dos Equis guy, but really, you’re the Men’s Warehouse Guy! (Side note: I have a theory that they are the same person!)

Now go forth and create your costume like no other has created.

See more of this kind of thinking and grammatical errors on Sparks’ blog at Q98.com!

Have a Q-uestion?

EMAIL: SPARKS@Q98.COM

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