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Congratulations to last issue’s winner, Jody, 44, of Hope, who submitted the following caption to last issue’s contest: “What do you mean, ‘We can’t use consumer fireworks for hunting?’”. Send your best caption to this week’s contest to: chris@nachotree.com and type “Caption Contest” in the subject line. The winning captions will be published in the next issue with the winner’s name, age and city with permission. Void where prohibited.
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• The largest number of children born to one woman is recorded at 69. From 17251765, a Russian peasant woman gave birth to 16 sets of twins, 7 sets of triplets, and 4 sets of quadruplets. • A car that shifts manually gets 2 miles more per gallon of gas than a car with automatic shift. EEK!
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IMAGINE THAT
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by TOM GAMMILL Distributed by Ink Bottle Syndicate, LLC
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FACT OR FICTION? • The Liberace Museum has a mirror-plated Rolls Royce, jewel-encrusted capes, and the largest rhinestone in the world, weighing 59 pounds and measuring almost a foot in diameter.
FUNNY PAPER
by DANIEL COLLINS
Š 2011 Daniel Collins / Distributed by Ink Bottle Syndicate, LLC
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WORD FIND
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BY MIA VONNE
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Old Lace October 12 ......7:30 pm October 13 ......7:30 pm October 19 ......7:30 pm October 20 ......7:30 pm October 21 ......2:00 pm
coming up:
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s Extra! are consumed Thousands of copies of Funnie ps, restaurants, auto sho monthly in hotels, diners, coffee ans’ offices, dental sici phy ls, pita hos ps, sho repair Funnies Extra! appeals to practices, etc. The content in antage of this unique and consumers of all ages. Take adv communities and beyond fun way to reach citizens in your ss and enjoy excellent ine with the message of your bus for up-front payment! s repeat discounts and great saving
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WIZARD OF ID
by PARKER & MASTROIANNI & HART
by RICK HOTTON
Distributed by Ink Bottle Syndicate, LLC
HOLY MOLÉ
Help Maine Chris Chris Quimby j national come
In 2013, he will pe Maine to Texas in hi Spokes and Jo performing standu sharing inspi facing fears and ch
He needs yo
DOGS OF C-KENNEL
by MICK & MASON MASTROIANNI
In an effort to raise fun he will kick of the Mai with a large comedy at the West Lodge at C in Brooks, M
Please come and inv for clean and funny com will entertain teenagers a
Although young children a would be a great opportunity for the evening, since childr with the entertainer for the There are no ticket fees for Tour. Chris is relying upon yo whatever you feel is fair to h
We look forward to s
HALF BAKED Distributed by Ink Bottle Syndicate, LLC
by RICK ELLIS
Pretour Sto
FAIR HAVE
81 West Fair H Brooks,
Saturday, Novem 7:00-8:3
spokesandj 8 | FUNNIES EXTRA! MIDCOAST EDITION | www.funnies-extra-maine.com | VOL 8 - OCTOBER 2012
hristian comedian by jumpstart his omedy career.
THE OTHER COAST
RALF THE DESTROYER
ds your help.
dren are not prohibited, this tunity for you to find a sitter children can often compete or the audience's attention. es for the Spokes and Jokes pon your generosity to donate r to help him on his journey.
SUNSHINE STATE
by GRAHAM NOLAN
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d invite your friends y comedy and music that gers and adults of all ages.
by SCOTT LINCOLN
Distributed by Ink Bottle Syndicate, LLC
ill pedal bike from in his self-organized nd Jokes Tour, andup comedy and inspiration of nd chasing dreams.
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by ADRIAN RAESIDE
d to seeing you there!
r Stop One
PICKLES
by BRIAN CRANE
VEN CAMPS
r Haven Lane s, Maine
ovember 3, 2012 -8:30pm
ndjokes.com VOL 8 - OCTOBER 2012 | www.funnies-extra-maine.com | FUNNIES EXTRA! MIDCOAST EDITION | 9
A Message from the Publisher Guy Chris Quimby is a husband, father, and publisher of Funnies Extra in Maine. A graphic designer and standup comedian, Chris has over ten years experience in the print industry. Chris and his wife, Heather, are excited to offer Funnies Extra to Maine, offering a fun and attractive departure from the norm. Chris can be reached at chris@chrisQuimby.com or facebook.com/ChrisQuimby
Spokes and Jokes Tour Aims to Replace Fear with Adventure by Chris Quimby Have you ever looked around at the inside walls of a cubicle and asked yourself, “Is this what I was meant for? Is this my purpose? What is that stain?� Have you wondered if life caught you by the legs while you were running off to somewhere fun, placed you inside a box and covered you with a lid poked with just enough ventilation to keep you alive, like a young boy might do with a frog? Me, too. And that’s not to suggest that we do what we do because we assume it’s our highest purpose. For sure, it may be a means to an end - a satisfactory method of generating enough income to support our lavish purchases of Premium Saltines and Extra Fancy Ketchup. Alas, maybe you have chosen your environment and are comfortable with the demands put on your life. It is my contention, however, that a good many of us ended up where we are and are only there because of fear of failure and lack of planning. Now, that’s not to say that fear is a negative force in and of itself. Fear keeps us from such activities as driving into telephone poles, eating meat that’s been in the refrigerator too long and perhaps driving into telephone poles while eating meat that’s been in the refrigerator too long. I call such a phenomenon justified fear. However, many of us simply fear too much. We are afraid that if we pursue
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something that is counter-cultural, controversial or risky, we will alienate ourselves. Others will observe us, remark critically, and ostracize us for being different. We fear that if we do something completely different from the norm, we will not be able to look around and have a template we can follow. We will be blazing our own trail, with no hope of assistance from anyone. We will wander off from the crowd looking for a treasure at the end of an untraveled road, possibly finding a reward, but very likely discovering disappointment while others look on. And, if my dreams are any indication, we will likely only be wearing underwear. I have lived most of my life obeying such fears, and am sick and tired of it. In the past few years, I have grown increasingly d i s s at i s fied with the direction m y life w a s headed in a variety of areas. It became abundantly clear to me that if I did not develop a plan for my life, other people and forces would plan my life for me, and I’m not sure they always have my best interests in mind. With that in mind, I quit my job of elev-
en years about twelve months ago, tired of coming in every day and wondering if I would be eliminated because of budget cuts. The only thing that was keeping me in that job was a fear that I was worth very little without it. I did not respect such a line of thinking. Some people disagreed with the decision, albeit respectfully, and I understand why. You don’t have to think deeply enough about it to arrive at the conclusion that it could be excellently stupid. But I am on a mission - a mission of inhibition with a disposition of ambition to change my position and condition. I want to make an honest effort to actively carve out a life that’s more consistent with my desires and giftings. I believe that God created me for a purpose, and I stop short of that by settling for something predictable and comfortable. I don’t want to f a d e into the crowd. I don’t want to be merely a human resource. B u t what will that lead to? Well, a 2,000-mile pedal-bike ride from Maine to Texas, performing standup comedy along the way. To make what is a long story a little smaller, just know that I am a Christian
Automotive Maintenance
standup comic who loves to bike and has done very little to promote my own comedy career, although what few opportunities I’ve had have gone very well. With that in mind, I decided to organize and promote my own unique tour called Spokes and Jokes, which will have me leave Maine on a bike in September of 2013 for a three-month trek to meet some inspirational friends in Texas. My wife and children are fully supportive and are helping me plan this adventure. They will also drive a vehicle along the route, enjoying the adventure and providing important support resources, like chocolate My desire is to share my story with others about how God is calling me out from of a mundane, cookie-cutter existence, to actively spit in the face of the fear of failure and to inspire other people to do the same. To learn more, and to follow my progress, please visit spokesandjokes.com. Such an adventure does not happen without the help of many, and my hope is that friends, family and fellow citizens will rally around me in my quest to add some color to what can oftentimes be a grayscale life. And fear not. Funnies Extra will continue in my absence. My mission is to add to my life and that of my family and others a measure of what I hope Funnies Extra provides, a departure from the norm, a reason to smile and color on every page. I will need to raise a lot of money for this trip. The first such effort will be at my first pretour performance at Camp Fair Haven, 81 West Fair Haven Road in Brooks on November 3 at 7pm. I would love for you to come and hear the story in person. If you wish to invite me to come and share and perform for your group, please contact me at chris@chrisQuimby.com or call (207)557-3251.
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FACT OR FICTION? • There are twice as many kangaroos in Australia as there are people. The kangaroo population is estimated at about 40 million. • In ancient Rome, it was considered a sign of leadership to be born with a crooked nose. by DANIEL BORIS Distributed by Ink Bottle Syndicate, LLC
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THIN LINES
by Randy Glasbergen © 2011 Jason Dodge / Distributed by Ink Bottle Syndicate, LLC
CRIME-QUIZ
© 2011 Werner Wejp-Olsen / Distributed by Ink Bottle Syndicate, LLC
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Funnies Extra! will feature at least four straight issues of comic strips and panels from aspiring, non-syndicated cartoonists. Comic strips or cartoon panels may be published from cartoonists of any age, with a short bio. For submission guidelines and information, go to: www.funnies-extra.com/submissions. Send each furnished strip as a PDF file along with your name, age, address and phone number. Send 5 to 10 color submissions to: submissions@funnies-extra.com and type “Spotlight” in the subject line. Good luck and have fun! (participation void where prohibited)
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Mark Simon is 25-year film & TV veteran amassing over 3,000 production credits including animation producer on Larry the Cable Guy’s latest movie, Tooth Fairy 2. His storyboard and animation companies, www.Storyboards-East.com, have included clients such as Disney, Universal, Viacom, Sony, HBO, Nickelodeon, FOX, Steven Spielberg, USA Networks, ABC Television and many others. His experience selling original TV series lead to his founding www. SellYourTvConceptNow.com to mentor other creators. He is also the author of ten popular industry texts, and lectures around the world at major conferences, entertainment trade schools and universities.
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65 MT. EPHRAIM RD, SEARSPORT MON-SAT, 9AM-5PM | 548-2363
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CHUCK DOWNS Cartoonist
I always find random things in my pockets at the end of the day: paper clips, gum wrappers, dry cleaning receipts and the ever-present lint. These drawings are what’s left in my head when the day is done: the random “pocket lint” of my brain. Chuck Downs is a carbon-based form of cartoonist who lives in Florida with his wife and two children. By day, he is vice president of marketing for a company that clearly does not conduct very thorough background checks. By night, he fights crime. Now that he is older, his experience only walks the gamut for fear of pulling a hamstring. He often “misuses” quotation marks, and likes to frequently split his infinitives.
The Weekly Crossword 2
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31 36
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KSW has automobile loan rates as low as
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ACROSS 1 Iffy attempt 5 Unwanted email 9 Way off 13 First-rate 14 "Candid Camera" request 15 Antitoxins 16 Notion 17 Bamboo muncher 18 Gemini, for one 19 Stocks slump 21 Keyed up 22 Composer Cole 23 Silly person 24 Silky synthetic 27 Word after sex or status 29 Spotted cat 31 Work for 32 Recede, as the tide 35 Two, for one 37 Christening observance 39 Hawaiian garland 40 Enjoy a book 42 Portray 43 Touched down 45 Church contribution 46 Introduction 49 Encroachment 51 Klutz's cry 52 It rises after a good rain 56 Gets older 57 Musical exercise 58 Nativity trio 59 Medical discovery 60 Abstain from 61 Eye part
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62 Now ___ this! 63 Genealogy diagram 64 Abnormal growth
24 25 26 28 30
Stir up Teen's woe Sasquatch kin Mr. Pitt New driver, often Blue-pencil Handel contemporary Memory unit Engine component Widespread outbreak False teeth One of two evils Unearth Hunt illegally Renegade Met production Sandwich cookie Tapestry thread Fluctuate Auspices Start to sink
DOWN 32 1 Gave voice to 33 2 Big fuss 3 Over again 34 4 Tall, skinny guy 36 5 Intelligence, 38 slangily 6 Conjunctivitis 7 City council 41 43 member 8 Entree item, 44 46 often 9 Tear into 47 10 Fake, as an 48 50 injury 11 Light-bulb gas 12 Like 4-down 52 14 Train for a bout 53 20 Clothing 54 55 embroidery 23 Like carbon or nitrogen Answer to to Last Crossword Answers last Week's month’s crossword W I T W A S H A D L I D E E R S A C E T B O X H O T L O K R A R E A D S B O T A V A T R E C O S N O O
N E S S A B L E B B E R W I O P O A L U S A L S I N E S I S H S N T O O D R U N U L A R G I L E T Y
C A L E L R I R N A N E D L S E P A H R E A R
A N O D E S M E A R D E N
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www.kswfcu.org 135 WALDO AVENUE, BELFAST, ME 04915 | (207)338-5160 FAX: (207)338-6129 222 COLLEGE AVENUE, WATERVILLE, ME 04901 | (207)872-5602 FAX: (207)872-5776
SPECTICKLES
by BILL ABBOTT THE DEEP END
by TYSON COLE Distributed by Ink Bottle Syndicate, LLC
© 2011 Bill Abbott / Distributed by Ink Bottle Syndicate, LLC
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VOL 8 - OCTOBER 2012 | www.funnies-extra-maine.com | FUNNIES EXTRA! MIDCOAST EDITION | 15
SPEED BUMP
by DAVE COVERLY
CHUCKLE BROS by BRIAN & RON BOYCHUCK
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