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Together
Fully committed
Gal, son of Sargeant Major (res) Yaron Amitay killed in Lebanon in 2006, joins an IDF combat unit
7 The IDF Widows and Orphans Organization bows its head in memory of the fallen soldiers and members of the security forces that gave their lives to protect the State of Israel. In their death they granted us life.
4 Letter from Defense Minister By MOSHE YA’ALON
5 Letter from IDFWO Chairwoman By NAVA SHOHAM SOLAN
6 Full circle
(Kobi Koankas)
By JOSH HASTEN
10 Coming of age By OFER LIVNAT
12 Friends forever By YUVAL PAIS
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14 Love story By KARNI ELDAD
16 Simply good
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By JPOST STAFF
The IDFWO embraces the widows and orphans of the IDF on behalf of the entire Jewish people, on this memorial day and throughout the year.
(Kobi Koankas)
18 Sponsorship opportunities
(Kobi Koankas)
(Marc Israel Sellem)
(Kobi Koankas)
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Magazine Editor: MARION FISCHEL Manager of Business Development: REVITAL YAKIN-KRAKOVSKY Graphic Artists: HANA BEN-ANO, KIYOSHI INOUE and DANIELA GLEISER
Tel 972-3-6918403 • idfwo.org
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DEAR FRIENDS,
DEAR FRIENDS OF THE IDFWO
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year has past. Another year. A year in which the bereaved families must somehow carry on with their lives, while the lives of those around them continue to develop and progress. A year of struggling to cope with the vast emptiness and deep heartache. A year of painful longing that accompanies their every step. These feelings do not release their grip on the hearts of the bereaved families. Every day of the year. These families – that raised their sons and daughters to live productive lives, who instilled their children with values and ideals and shaped them to be who they were – suddenly found themselves facing a painful, earthshattering reality that none of us can begin to understand. With every passing day, our bereaved families cling tighter to the memories, to small moments – fighting with all their might so as not to forget sights and smells of a time when their family was whole. Every day, every night. On weekdays and at the dawn of Shabbat. On holidays. In every season. There is the life before the loss, and the life after – with a high wall separating the two. The State of Israel is currently facing a wave of Palestinian terror which, most unfortunately, has added families to the circle of the bereaved. The pain is unbearable, and there is no one who can better understand the shattered hearts of the newly bereaved than those who previously lost their sons and daughters. Over the course of 68 years, and for decades prior to the establishment of our State, there have been those who seek to do us harm and upturn our lives in various ways, yet we have prevailed. For 68 years, the IDF and our security forces have protected us and our right to a Jewish homeland. They have enabled us to blossom as a nation and reach tremendous heights in so many different fields. The price we have paid along the way, the loss of young lives ended so prematurely, is enormous. Coping with loss is very personal. Each person handles it in their own way, within themselves and amongst their family. On Yom Hazikaron, this deeply personal mourning becomes something public, engulfing the entire nation. We, a people who sanctify life and yearn for peace, stand in pain alongside the stories and memories of those our nation has lost. From every corner of our land, every man and woman, people of all faiths, religious and secular – the mourning and loss touches us all. We encounter the bereaved families among the cold tombstones and memorial ceremonies, continuously amazed by their strength and ability to choose life in the face of the terrible tragedy that has befallen their family. They are our pillar of fire. Yours, Moshe (Bogie) Ya’alon Minister of Defense
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MOSHE YA’ALON DEFENSE MINISTER (Marc Israel Sellem)
nfortunately, terrorism has returned to the streets in recent months. Fear has taken the place of hope, and anxiety has replaced calm as walking in the streets has once again become dangerous. Added to this, those who have traveled abroad, wishing to escape a little from the troubles at home, have found that terrorism knows no borders. Fear is no longer just our premise, but is now shared by those in Europe – victims too, of terrible and needless acts of terror. Such tragic events in Israel and abroad prove time and again that we are inseparable components of a huge system that affects us all. Following the recent murderous attacks in Israel, we at IDFWO have tragically been joined by a young mother of two young children. Her husband was a soldier who lost his life in an act of terror. Difficult times such as these call for increased unity. We must join hands. Although we have many enemies, we can at the very least, assist each other. We can support, strengthen and accept each other and our differences. Our challenges must result in social cohesiveness so that, as one, we can steer our efforts toward improving life for each other in whatever way we possibly can. We must also be united in maintaining restraint by remembering our most basic values. These, as we are all aware, are peace, love, and kindness. By giving – of our time, of ourselves and of our means – we plant love, we pour kindness and we sow the seeds of peace. I am optimistic that in our small country things will change and that the future will be brighter. This is necessary for the sake of our children’s future and the future of Israel – a place in which morality and the value of life are our guiding lights. We will find the way to, first and foremost, live in peace among ourselves. Here at IDFWO we continue to do all we can to promote the values we so believe in. This is reflected in projects such as the Otzma (which means “strength” in Hebrew) camps for orphans, our annual bar/bat mitzva celebration in Jerusalem, our subsidized retreat for widows, the Widow Adopts a Widow Project, along with a wide variety of other activities designed to the well being and enjoyment of our widows and orphans. I wish us all days of calm, filled with many happy and enjoyable moments, as we continue to do everything in our power to help our widows and orphans smile.
NAVA SHOHAM SOLAN IDFWO CHAIRWOMAN (Kobi Koankas)
Yours, Nava Shoham Solan
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Full circle
SERGEANT MAJOR Yaron Amitay, killed in Lebanon in 2006, had volunteered as a combat medic with the paratroopers. (Courtesy) (Courtesy)
Gal Amitay follows his father’s values and principles • JOSH HASTEN
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decade ago, when IDF sergeant Gal Amitai, now 21 and serving in an anti-tank company within the paratroopers, was just 11 years old, he had already decided that he would become a high level combat soldier. Tragically, this decision came about when Amitai and his two siblings were sitting shiva for their father S ergeant (res.) Yaron Amitai, who was killed in 2006, just hours before a cease fire brought the Second Lebanon War to a close. At 45, Yaron was the oldest IDF casualty from that war. He had volunteered as a combat medic with the paratroopers, even though he was exempt from reserve duty at his
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age. He died along with another soldier while inside a house they had set up as a makeshift triage center where they alongside IDF doctors in the Southern Lebanon village of Kantara, were treating wounded troops. The house was accidentally targeted by an IDF tank in a friendly fire incident, with a shell scoring a direct hit on the structure – resulting in the death of both soldiers. GAL, NOW 16 months into his service, reflects on the father he lost, and on the impact this loss has had on his wish to defend his country, and his strong sense of patriotism. Although he does not have many memories of his father “as a soldier,” he says he remembers Yaron as “the ultimate family man.”
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“He was the funniest person ever, full of humor. We did a lot of trips – especially in the south – and if we went to a park he was always the first one to jump around on the playground equipment. He was like a child clowning around,” Gal says. His father worked long hours during the week selling life insurance – Gal defines his father’s civilian job as “the ultimate paradox” – often returning home late at night. But Friday, he says was his “father’s day.” He remembers them eating hummus together and spending quality time with him on those Fridays when he was a child. While the rules of the IDF stipulate that the children of the fallen while serving are not required to serve in combat units, Gal has insisted on pursuing that path. In such a case the surviving parent
– Gal’s mother Meirav – is required to sign a document allowing him or her to essentially volunteer for combat service despite the loss. “Already at the shiva, (at the age of 11), I asked for my mother’s blessing, and asked her to sign the form, [when the time comes],” he says. “When it [being drafted] got closer I asked her again, and she was hesitant to sign, but I was at peace with my decision. When the actual time came she signed even through her tears. I feel that period and all the feelings that went with it together.” Gal’s older sister Yuval, now 24,
Friday was ‘father’s day.’ Gal remembers them eating hummus together and spending quality time with him
served as a commander in a tank unit, and his younger brother Assaf 17, is now getting ready for his army service. Meirav had to sign the IDF document for each of her children. “I signed with mixed feelings,” she says. “On one hand I want to give them the freedom to choose [their army paths], but on the other I am filled with great anxiety. [Because of our loss], I can’t at this point say to them that ‘everything will be OK’ [during their respective service].” Gal seconds his mother’s sentiment. “‘It won’t happen to me,’ is what people say, but I don’t subscribe to that slogan. It can happen, [getting hurt or worse] so it’s a bit scary. But the pride and happiness in service lessens the feelings of being scared to a point where they almost don’t exist.” He adds that going into combat was a decision based on the value and principles he was raised with by his parents, in which he was encouraged to
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pursue his strengths. “If I knew I could excel in computers, I would go for that, but I felt I could contribute more to the State in combat.” He adds that serving in combat “is full circle for me, after what happened to my father.” MEIRAV ALSO reflects on her deceased husband’s decision to volunteer during the war and on the fact that Gal is now a combat soldier – and on the risks that accompany that fact. She says that she respects the fact that her husband volunteered, even though she is now sometimes angry that he did. “I lost him for the same reason that I loved him,” she says. “For Yaron, if you were a friend, then you were a friend until the end, (as in fully committed), the same if you were a father or a husband or a soldier. He felt he had no choice but to go into battle.” Regarding Gal’s service, she admits to having mixed feelings about it but says, “I have confidence he knows what he is doing. Gal is calm under pressure and
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IDF Widows & Orphans Organization
THANKS Rabbi
Yechiel Eckstein
IDF MEMBER Gal Amitay and his brother, Assaf, now 17, pose with their grandmothers. (Courtesy)
demonstrates good judgment.” Gal’s celebrated his bar-mitzva along with other children who lost a parent in the army, as part of the IDF Widows and Orphans’s communal bar-mitzva program.
‘Those who care about Israel might not have truly grasped the sacrifice made on behalf of the entire Jewish People by those who fell in battle, and the struggle of the surviving families IDFWO CHAIRWOMAN Nava Shoham Solan remembers Gal’s bar-mitzva and recalls that he delivered an emotional speech about his father. Her own husband was killed in 1982 in Israel’s First Lebanon War – and she joined IDFWO as a volunteer, in 2007. Nava knows the Amitai family well. She points out that Gal’s sister Yuval has worked as a volunteer counselor at the
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IDFWO’s Otzma (“strength”) camps for children which are held several times a year during the holidays – while Assaf has attended as a camper. The goal of these camps, she says, is to allow the youngsters to learn about resiliency while in a supportive environment with others who have experienced similar loss, along with their counselors. The organization has been involved in assisting the Amitais through their grief for years. “IDFWO has given us strength,” says Meirav. “It’s important to be a part of an organization that gives us so much help.” She adds that IDFWO “does important work behind the scenes to be a voice for those [who suffered loss].” That includes lobbying Knesset lawmakers for increased benefits for the relatives of victims. At the same time, Meirav feels that Jews around the world who care about Israel might in the past not have truly grasped the sacrifice which was made on behalf of not only Israel but the entire Jewish People by those who fell in battle, and the struggle which the surviving family members goes though. But thanks to the work of IDFWO she says that feels that now they can understand, ultimately appreciating and also realizing she says, “that we [Jews] have no other country.” •
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the president of IFCJ International Fellowship of Christians and Jews for their ongoing support Thanks to their generous donations, IDF orphans participate in Otzma camps three times a year GAL AND his brother Assaf have fond and inspiring memories of their father. (Courtesy)
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Coming of age
The bar/bat mitzva year is both special and challenging, and the IDFWO can be counted on
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• OFER LIVNAT
he highlight of Yonatan Shipenbauer’s bar mitzva was being called up to the Torah at the Western Wall. This is one of those meaningful events for children in which the presence of a father is a given. However, in Yonatan’s case, his father Daniel was absent, killed in a Yasur helicopter crash in Romania, five years ago. Yonatan lives in Moshav Kidron near Gedera with his mother and his brothers (IDF officer) Amit, 21, Roy, 18, and Yonatan, 13. Yael Shipenbauer was already familiar with the activities and the ceremonies surrounding the bar mitzva of an IDF orphan because, when tragedy struck their family, Roy had just turned 13. Yonatan’s experience, she explained, was significantly different from that of her oldest son. Nevertheless, the IDFWO took great care to make sure that every
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child feels truly enveloped in a warm and supportive environment. “The ceremony for being called up to the Torah took place for Roy four months following the tragedy,” Yael explained. “I was in shock. I didn’t stop crying throughout the entire event, and the experiences were different. “This time, five years have passed, and it does something. I knew what we were approaching, and Yonatan was waiting for it. He came back from the summer camp in the United States feeling very much connected to the rest of the children.” Yael says that, “There was never any doubt” about whether or not to send the children to the IDFWO bar mitzva year activities, even though they connect them to the mourning and the disaster that the family experienced. “Yonatan was happy to come and meet the rest of the children. The children in the Otzma summer camp spend
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three weeks without phones in order to disconnect; and this matured him a lot.” The family had moved to Kidron three days before the tragedy. For many years they had lived in the Tel Nof Air Force Base, and when Daniel’s position no longer required living there, they moved nearby so that they could still look out at the landing strips, and it would be easy for him to serve in the Military Reserves. Yet the Shipenbauers have remained alone with a view of the base that had been their home, and are now forced to begin a new life without Daniel. “We built a house and Dani wasn’t able to live in it. I was still in the midst of cartons when they came to notify me of his death,” explains Yael. “It was a dramatic entry into the moshav. After three days everyone already knew who we are, but it was simple for the children because their friends were there. They remained in the same environment. It was diffi-
YONATAN SHIPENBAUER and fellow bar mitzva boy are flanked by IDF officers on the day of their calling up to the Torah. Right, IDF Chief Rabbi Shai Abramson cheers the boys on. (Kobi Koankas)
cult for me in the beginning. I thought that because I knew what I was going through, I could easily handle it, but it was very emotional. I didn’t imagine that I would be so emotional.” She feels that the IDFWO bar mitzva trip to the US and Canada [part of the IDFWO Bar Mitzva Year Program] contributed to making Roy and Yonatan “more independent and mature.” “During three weeks the children saw that they can be far from home. The influence [of the entire bar mitva year activities] have been very good on Yonatan. He looks forward to going on these activities. With Roy, even though he really had a good time, I had to convince him each time to attend the camps. Yonatan always wants to meet with the friends from there, and that is wonderful. The children have a shared situation that they don’t have in everyday life, and apparently there is a special openness there that is difficult to describe. Even I do not understand it. The children come from similar backgrounds and getting to know children in the same situation from many places in Israel creates something special. It is hard for me to under-
stand how this happens, but very beautiful relationships are created there.” The youngsters enjoyed trips, challenging workshops and fun-filled special event days. At the end of the Hebrew year they spent three weeks at a summer camp in the United States. THE STORY is a little different for Raya Greenfeld, 12. Her father, Yehuda, lost his life almost nine years ago during the Second Lebanon War in the tragedy of the Katyusha rocket that fell in Kfar Giladi. At that time they lived in Maale Michmash and today the family lives in Kiryat Arba. Raya’s mother, Gabrielle, works as a speech therapist and she and her brother, Ron, 9, do not regularly attend the IDFWO activities. “There is no daily connection with the IDFWO, but there is a feeling of support. Someone looks out for you and is there. Even if I do not receive help, it is good to know that it exists,” said Gabrielle. “My daughter Raya is at a meaningful age, the transition from childhood to maturity, which is a time when the absence is very much felt. Therefore the support of the IDFWO is important. We are now preparing a bat mitzva year movie for her and are looking at what she likes to do. You can see her father’s influence on her.” Even though the family does not take advantage of all the IDFWO activities, Raya wanted to participate in the cere-
mony for bar mitzva and bat mitzva children in Jerusalem. “The event was very exciting,” Gabrielle says. “It is significant that the IDFWO relates to the fact that the children reach bar/bat mitzva age, and that this is an important milestone in their lives. The entire day is built around connections – Zionism, being Israeli, religious significance. It was evident that someone thought about all the details.” Raya also made new friends, says her mother. “There is certainly something different in their relationship, even though her friends from home have known her for many years and know her story. But there is something else when the children are together with other children who experienced bereavement. It is something different, a different connection, and a different kind of understanding. I don’t think they have to talk about it or deal with bereavement. There is something in the fact that you know that those at your side had an experience similar to yours.” Gabrielle feels that the day was special for her daughter. “She enjoyed herself very much. It was meaningful for her to be together with the other children her age, and to see the attention given to her and to us by the IDFWO. It is something that she waited for, and of course she enjoyed the presents,” Gabrielle adds with a smile. •
RAYA GREENFELD is accompanied during her bat mitzva party by IDF Chief Rabbi Rafi Peretz, IDFWO chairwoman Nava Shoham Solan and Colonel Yaffa Mor. (Kobi Koankas)
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wo eight year olds, Etai Danor and Idan Shulman, became friends at an IDFWO Otzma (“strength”) camp. Eitan is from Rosh Haayin and Idan from Beit Hakerem. “It’s fun for me to come to the camp,” says Etai. “I like the games at camp very much, and I made many new friends,” says Idan. “Even in our room before we go to sleep, we speak about lots of things like soccer that I really love – Maccabi Tel Aviv and especially Barcelona.” “I’m a fan of Hapoel Tel Aviv,” interjects Eitan. For Idan the sports activities were the most enjoyable. “Sports are my hobby. I like swimming, basketball, track and field such as running 60 meters,” he says. “I really loved the Color War activities and the competitions that were organized on the sports day.” Etai is the son of Shai, a pilot who lost his life in a helicopter accident while serving in the Military Reserves. His grandfather was also a pilot who commanded the Tel Nof Air Force Base. Idan’s father was a doctor who passed away from cancer while still serving in the Medical Corps. “We once spoke together about our loss,” the orphaned son says.
Friends for life
‘I MADE new friends here. I feel that I am not alone,” says Valeria Yaskov, 13. “It’s fun here. I met new friends who are friends for life, not just for the camps. I am part of a very cohesive group in which the friends cooperate with each other in a very good way.” Adim Tarudi, 12, comes from the village of Samia, near Ma’alot. “Otzma is also my family,” he says. “They always treat us graciously, take care of us, and tell us how much they love us. Everyone here is like my parents and
Otzma camps allow IDF orphans to interact naturally with peers 12
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• YUVAL PAIS
(Kobi Koankas)
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my brothers, and I really love everyone.” For Valeria: “The camps give me self-confidence and enable me to meet children who experience the same feelings that I do. I feel that I am not alone, and it’s good to feel that way.” Adim met new friends at camp, too, and he says it was a very powerful experience for him. One of the advantages of the Otzma camps, which offer a variety of activities, is that the children are able to make use of their special talents. “I especially liked the soccer,” Adim says. “I am a soccer player so that is what I enjoy. There was a tournament and we finished in third place, but it was fun, a great experience. I love to study and to play soccer; and right now I am trying to combine the two. I love soccer more, but I have to study.” Valeria enjoyed the dance at camp and in her daily life, she says, she combines dance with studies “very well,” devoting “time for training twice a week and also for performances.” The camps take place three times a year, in a variety of locations. While combining sports activities, trips, learning and more, the camps enable youngsters to share similar experiences with other children and with their trained counselors. Carmel Ohion, 9 from Nazareth Illit, said that one of the events she liked the most was the Color War. She and her friends, Or Shaul, 8, from Alfei Menashe, Naama Chen, 6, from Gan Yavne and Eliah Asulin, 9 from Modi’in, have formed a tight-knit group. “The Color War and the party were the very best activities at camp,” Eliah emphasizes, and her friends agree with her. “Aside from that,” she says, “there were games that were a lot of fun, including trivia and sports games.” “We had a tug of war competition, and all of us in both the groups fell down because the rope tore,” laughs Naama, the youngest in the group. •
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LOVE STORY Two Canadian donors discuss their reasons for helping IDFWO
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• KARNI ELDAD
orth American Jews are known for their great generosity and philanthropic donations to Israeli charities, greatly assisting the survival of these institutions and thus contributing to the foundation of society in Israel. The IDF Widows and Orphans Organization is among those that benefit from such support and generosity which provides assistance for its numerous activities aimed at the welfare of thousands of organization members. We spoke to two of these charitable benefactors, Brian Hochman and Esti Cohen, regarding their bond to Israel and their desire to give, which culmi-
BRIAN HOCHMAN (Courtesy).
nates in much more than a financial donation. “I was born and raised in Toronto, Canada,” says Hochman, an observant Jew connected with every molecule of his being to Israel. “I have been to Israel more than 30 times. My son made aliya (moved here) right after high school and served in the army. My daughter made aliya at an even younger age, and now she’s in high school in Jerusalem, living with a guest family in the capital. I have a very warm and close bond with Israel and the Jewish people. My parents immigrated to Israel at the age of 86 and I pray that I’ll make the same move one day.” Hochman reveals why he chose to donate so often and, in particular, to the IDFWO. “There are two things I’m connected to emotionally,” he says. “Israel and children. When I heard about the organization, and the children who have paid the ultimate price with maximum total sacrifice, I immediately understood whom I wanted to donate to. These widows and orphans have sacrificed everything so that we can live in freedom. Yes, their sacrifice affects our lives as Jews, here in Canada. A strong Israel makes us strong here.” Hochman’s bond to the IDF orphans goes far beyond a signature on a check.
The sacrifice isn’t only made by the ones who are killed – it’s also made by all those around them. If I can make it even a little easier, of course I’m going to do all I can. We owe them an enormous debt’ 14
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One year he hosted five orphans at his family home in Canada – along with their tour guide. “The bond was really instant,” he recalls. “We recognized their beauty, their excitement and their uncertainty, because for some of them this was their first visit overseas. We do what we can to bring a little more sunlight into the lives of these kids.” One day, Hochman explains, the tour guide asked me “why I do it.” He explained that “Israel helps us be who we are here.” After Operation Entebbe, he says “suddenly the world saw how supportive Jews are of each other all over the world. There was a significant change. Suddenly a Jew could walk the city with side curls, a beard and a yarmulke. Suddenly they couldn’t belittle us or kick us around anymore. It makes our hearts resilient.” Hochman uses a family anecdote to illustrate why it is so important to him to donate to Israel and its institutions. “My father grew up in a small town in the Ukraine, and when the Nazis came, they only had to send three soldiers to round up all the town’s Jews. This was in 1942. The Jews already knew where they were headed and still – they went like lambs to the slaughter. A strong Israel will prevent that kind of thing.” Hochman is aware that, “there are organizations that are more fun to donate to. But it isn’t about fun. It’s hard, and it’s heavy. But it’s meaningful. When you see those kids and their family situation, you understand that the sacrifice isn’t only made by the ones who are killed – it’s also made by all those around them. And if I can make it even a little easier for them, of course I’m going to do all I can. We owe them an enormous debt.”
‘We do what we can to bring a little more sunlight lives of these kids’ One year, Hoffman attended a bar mitzva at the Wailing Wall. He describes it as the most intense experience he ever had in Israel. “I saw those kids, who didn’t have a father to lead them to the Wailing Wall on their day of celebration, who didn’t have anyone to teach them how to lay tefillin; it moved me very much. They are on a difficult journey, and we will do all we can to help them.” ESTI AND RANDY COHEN are a couple who dedicate their lives and souls to IDF orphans. Esti, originally from Israel, has lived in Canada for close to 30 years. She fell in love with the IDFWO completely by chance. “I met a friend at the supermarket and
ESTI COHEN (Avraham Sassoni).
ESTI AND her husband Randy pose with IDF orphans (Courtesy)
we began to chat, and then she told me that she had seen an article in the Canadian Jewish News on IDF widows and orphans. And that was it. I went home and thought to myself, ‘who am I compared to them?’ “I really do a lot for children. I call my kids my miracles because I had two children from 13 pregnancies. So when I finished working and raising them, I began to devote all my time to children. I produced fashion shows for children, charity events for children, all kinds of things. But when I heard about the IDF orphans – I was struck speechless. Cohen and her friend felt a strong need to donate to the orphans.
The enormous sacrifice of these families makes me cry just to think about it. They’re dying for our State “We organized an amazing fund raiser evening,” she explains excitedly. “From then on, things began to roll along, and we slowly brought in more and more people from the community. Our community is simply amazing,” she says. “You say ‘IDF orphans’ and everyone comes running. They stand in line to welcome them into their homes – they even fight for the right. And when they host them, they do it with all their hearts.” Esti and Randy’s home is one of grace, and that is how they raised their children. For years, they have volunteered
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their home to accommodate children with autism and/or learning disabilities. “We taught [our children] to give,” Cohen says. When IDF orphans land in Toronto they receive a welcome bag full of treats, and then they are divided up among the families and begin to have fun. As one of the heads of IDFWO in Canada today, Esti is in charge of assigning the children, raising funds, organizing the trip’s agenda and even offering hospitality in her own home. “We have a wonderful program,” she says. “There isn’t one restaurant that isn’t eager to serve them [the children] for free. There is a games area here where you can spend the entire day playing. I found out the owner was Jewish, and when I approached him, he told me, “as long as I’m the owner, bring the kids here whenever you want, for free.” If we had to pay, it would cost $2,000 a day, and that’s only one example of many.” Cohen explains. “We hire a DJ and have a dance party in the streets; one evening we take the kids to a huge store and give each of them a $30 gift card. They go crazy over that!” Members of the wealthy Toronto Jewish community receive visits every evening from fund raisers of various organizations. “We give a little to each one, because you can’t just not give,” says Cohen. “But IDF orphans are a different story. The enormous sacrifice of these families makes me cry just to think about it. They’re dying for our State. So what else can we do if we don’t provide them with a little fun and help them forget their troubles for a while? We really are doing it with all of our hearts.” •
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SIMPLY GOOD
‘It’s simply fun, love, culture, family. It’s simply good’
Tamy Shelach and Ido Levita, two IDFWO volunteers, share what they do and why they do it IDO LEVITA serves as an Otzma camp counselor. (Kobi Koankas)
• Jerusalem Post staff
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amy Shelach was widowed in the Yom Kippur War. After his death, her late husband Lt. Col. Lieutenant Colonel Ehud Shelach received the Chief of Staff Citation. He was a combat squadron commander, who was killed on the fourth day of fighting. Tragically, he was missing for almost six months before his body was found. “As an IDF widow I naturally joined the IDFWO,” says Shelach, a long-time member, who not only volunteers in the Widow Adopts a Widow Project, but also serves on the organization’s Board of Directors. “The Widow Adopts a Widow Project begins with one-time visits to the widows to inform them of what their rights, inquire about their emotional state, and make sure that they know whom to contact in time of need,” she explains. “When we visit widows at their homes we sense their feelings, taste their tears and truly empathize with them. We let them know we are an open door, an attentive ear and a supportive shoulder for everything that they might need. If we feel additional visits are necessary, we no-
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tify the IDFWO and continue those visits.” Shelach visits three widows regularly. One woman was widowed in the War of Independence, another, in addition to being an IDF widow is also the bereaved mother of a fallen IDF soldier. A third is the widow of a disabled IDF soldier. “The relationship has become mutual,” she says, explaining that when she doesn’t feel well the women call to ask about her. “I am filled with a sense of giving. I go to them to give, not to receive. I go to get them out of the house and to a coffee shop, to bring medications if necessary, to be in contact with their children. In general, I am available for them in anything they need.” Shelach uses a Chinese proverb to explain her feelings. “We cannot prevent the birds of sadness and pain from circling above our heads, but we can prevent them from building a nest in our hair.” That, she says, is the essence of “what we try to achieve with this project – light and happiness. We bring them to this important place by taking them to an occasional movie or to a performance, just sitting and talking, or even just going out of the house, all in an entirely responsible way.”
IDFWO
MAY 2016
IDO LEVITA is a 26-year-old student who began volunteering as an Otzma camp counselor over Passover, 2012. He works in the Education Ministry and is in his third and final year of philosophy, economics and political science at Jerusalem’s Hebrew University. Levita explains that after completing his military service he had looked around for somewhere to be a counselor, having participated as a camper in the youth movement Hanoar Ha’oved Ve’halomed, and being inspired to give back. “A friend, Yanon Merom, one of the counselors I now work with, told me about Otzma. I was very enthusiastic and the following day already met with Shlomi Nahumson [IDFWO’s director of youth programs] who interviewed me for the position. This was before Passover and within a week and a half I was involved in the program. It was unplanned, but it happened, and I am very glad that it did.” At first, Levita says, he was concerned about never having experienced “dealing with this sort of challenge as a counselor. It took time to get used to it and to adjust to the atmosphere, but it is similar to a step that as soon as you take it, everything becomes a lot easier.” “The first time the subject of loss comes up with the campers, it’s like an initial
TAMY SHELACH (second from right) volunteers in the Widow Adopt a Widow Program. (Kobi Koankas) meeting with harsh reality. It becomes a lot easier afterwards.” After four years as a counselor at Otzma camps, Levita concludes that “it is undoubtedly one of the most meaningful experiences in my life. It no longer feels like a program in which I am a counselor, but more like a family. The connection with the campers is not only at camp, but also continues afterwards. There is a closer connection with some of the families, so that these are personal relationships. “I don’t know if it’s possible to describe it in words,” he says. “I think that if you would ask each of the counselors, it’s simply fun, love, culture, family. It’s simply good. It is almost – if not completely – pure.” When asked about one moment that he especially remembers, Levita finds it hard to choose. “There are many such stories,” he explains, but eventually decides to highlight two of them. “The second event occurred on the last Memorial Day for the Fallen Soldiers of Israel,” he begins, “it was an especially meaningful day because during the most difficult moments in the cemeteries all the
LIFELONG FRIENDSHIPS are formed through IDFWO activities. (Kobi Koankas)
counselors accompanied the campers and stood with them by their parents’ graves. Many campers suddenly opened up on that day.” And the first? “At the beginning of my first camp, before we even got to the campsite on the first day, one of the campers
IDFWO
MAY 2016
approached me at a stop along the way. He asked me if I was the new counselor for his group,” explains Levita, his voice filled with emotion. “I told him that I was. I was still feeling nervous and under a lot of pressure. Then the boy simply hugged me. I will never forget it.” •
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BAR AND BAT MITZVA CELEBRATION
SPONSORSHIP OPPORTUNITIES ADVANCED SKILLS COURSES
$2,160p/p
(Kobi Koankas)
$2,500
ANNUAL WIDOWS’ RETREAT (Kobi Koankas)
Every year the IDFWO assists hundreds of orphans by providing for their future. Those who wish to attend college or university receive scholarships, and those getting married are given important and useful wedding gifts. These gifts and scholarships relieve IDF widows of some of the burden in caring for their children’s future. p/p For the orphans themselves, this is a crucial jumpstart to begin building their own lives.
GRANTS AND LOANS
(Kobi Koankas)
$150p/p
IDFWO
MAY 2016
$2,500p/p
BAR AND BAT MITZVA NORTH AMERICA TRIP
Every year the IDFWO offers hundreds of widows a relaxing five-day retreat vacation, a time to get away from the mundane and adjust their mindsets. Participants are able to enjoy exciting hikes and trips by day, and are entertained by professional comedians, performers and singers by night. The retreat provides our widows with a sense of togetherness and solace, as they take a break from their daily lives which are often filled with a pervasive sense of loss. It allows them to share peace, tranquility and quiet with other women who, sadly, can relate to the pain and grief of losing their partner.
Every year, the IDFWO sends those orphans becoming bar or bat mitzva on an unforgettable trip to the United States and Canada. For 21 days they enjoy summer camp activities, tour new cities and famous sites and become friends with American campers their age. They also have the opportunity to bond with each other on a much deeper level. Thus, they not only form lifelong friendships, but also receive unlimited love, support and encourp/p agement from each other, our staff and the American friends – youngsters and adults – that they make.
(Kobi Koankas)
The IDFWO assists with grants and loans for widows who find themselves in financial despair. A considerable portion of the organization’s annual budget is directed toward assisting the women who face such difficulties and have no one to turn to for help. The organization examines their financial problems and through significant grants and need-based loans, provides a crucial helping hand. (Kobi Koankas)
The IDFWO plans an annual day out replete with entertainment for IDF widows and adult orphans. This offers them the opportunity to escape the burdens of daily life and enjoy beautifully served and nourishing meals, stimulating lectures and leisure activities. In short it is a chance for them to forget about everything else and simply relax and enjoy a fun-filled day.
(Kobi Koankas)
(Kobi Koankas)
UNIVERSITY SCHOLARSHIPS AND WEDDING GIFTS
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The organization’s Otzma (“strength”) camps take place three times a year, during the Sukkot, Hannuka and Pessah vacations. Children make friends with peers who unfortunately understand their pain all too well. These camps are built on sturdy educational foundations and years of experience. We provide a life setting that strengthens and supports the children, assisting them to grow into positive and healthy human beings as well as proud citizens of Israel.
(Kobi Koankas)
$500p/p
REJUVENATING DAY TRIP
$1,360p/p
OTZMA CAMP
(Kobi Koankas)
The IDFWO subsidizes a variety of courses for widows and for adult orphans throughout Israel. These include Hebrew literature, English language, technology-related subjects, the ins and outs of the stock market, as well as arts and crafts such as crocheting, and more much.
(Kobi Koankas)
The IDFWO strives to make the important Jewish coming-of-age milestone in a child’s life as special and meaningful as possible, given the circumstances. We hold a moving annual celebration in Jerusalem, at the Western Wall in Jerusalem for all our young heroes and heroines who become bar or bat mitzva that year. The president of Israel, the Defense minister, the chief of staff and other countless supporters, family members, friends and loved ones take an active part in this momentous event.
IDFWO
MAY 2016
$900p/p
$3,600
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They feel the pain everyday Help us bring back the smile to their faces Support the Orphans of the IDF Donate Now Tel 972-3-6918403 Ext. 8 • idfwo.org/?CategoryID=415