INBETWEEN April/May 2016 by INBETWEEN Magazine

FOR PARENTS CAUGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF RAISING A TEEN & YOUNG ADULT

APRIL/MAY 2016

“MY TEEN IS TRANSGENDER”

ONE FAMILY’S STORY

YOU CAUGHT YOUR TEEN SEXTING

now what?

ART IMITATES LIFE

HOW TO HELP YOUR KID DEAL WITH REJECTION

win

WE’RE GIVING AWAY

$500

WORTH OF SPA GIFT CERTIFICATES!

FOR ANTHONY ANDERSON ON BLACK-ISH

April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

inbetween APRIL/MAY 2016

ANTHONY ANDERSON

INSIGHT 6 MODERN FAMILY Raising a

transgender teen

10 RAISING DAD Want to know

when you’ve earned big parenting points? 13 10 MINUTES WITH...

J.C. MacKenzie

INFORM 17 HEALTH & LIFE NEWS 19 ASK THE EXPERT Kimberly Moffit

FAMILY STYLE GUIDE

on talking to your teen about sex 21 MIND THE GAP Is a gap year

right for your kid?

25 ENTRY DENIED Help your teen

deal with school rejection

INSPIRE 28 TWIN CHEFS

25 21

Lilly and Audrey Andrews on inspiring other kids to cook 34 ANTHONY ANDERSON

How the hit show black-ish has become a family affair

DEALING WITH REJECTION

38 FAMILY STYLE GUIDE

Fresh spring looks for the whole family

MIND THE GAP

INDULGE

42 UNWIND 5 spas you need

to try now

49 FACE TIME 6 reasons you

need a facial now

53 FINAL THRILL Lovely lilacs

April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Meet the Team APRIL/MAY 2016 EDITOR-IN-CHIEF

RACHEL NAUD ART DIRECTOR

CAROLINE BISHOP MANAGING EDITOR

SHANDLEY MCMURRAY FASHION EDITOR

JORDANA HANDLER WEBSITE MANAGER

VICTOR CHARD

Contributors LARA HYDE is a mom, editor, crafter, blogger and author of young adult novel, Mosquito Bites. On page 13, she chatted with actor J.C. MacKenzie about his new show Vinyl, his cross-country move and raising a tween in NYC.

EDITORIAL INTERNS

STEFANIE PHILLIPS ASHLEY PUCH CONTRIBUTORS PETER CARTER, CAROL FUNNELL, RYAN FRANCOZ, CHANTAL GRAY, JORDANA HANDLER, LARA HYDE, SHANDLEY MCMURRAY, KIMBERLY MOFFIT, STEFANIE PHILLIPS, ASHELY PUCH, CRYSTAL WOOD, AGNES WYWROT, JAMIE ZACHARY, NATALIA ZURAWSKA Copyright© 2016 INBETWEEN Magazine.

INBETWEEN’s Editorial Intern, STEFANIE PHILLIPS, is a freelance writer, travel enthusiast and die-hard foodie. In this issue, she tackled two tough topics: raising a transgender teen on page 6 and what to do when your kid wants to take a gap year on page 21.

All rights reserved. All images, unless otherwise noted, are from iStockphoto. No part of this magazine may be reproduced without the written permission of the publisher. The publisher accepts no responsibility for advertisers’ claims, unsolicited manuscripts, transparencies or other materials. FOR ANY QUESTIONS, SUBMISSIONS OR COMMENTS, PLEASE CONTACT INFO@INBETWEEN.CA.

After 15+ years as a journalist, JAMIE ZACHARY experienced a first for INBETWEEN—a day at the spa. On page 42, Zachary wrote about his visit to Calgary’s Spa Ritual and why he thinks you should go. April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Raising Dad

BECAUSE SOMETIMES, A GIRL’S GOTTA WALK.

The Skechers GOwalk 3 is made with our latest high-rebound comfort innovation, Goga Mat® Technology. Adaptive Go PillarsTM underfoot createthe softest ride you could ever imagine.

INNOVATION NEVER FELT THIS GOOD.

skechersGOrun.com

April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

From Rachel EDITOR’S LETTER

KEEPING IT

real

NO MATTER WHAT part of the country or globe you’re in, the realities of parenting are universal. Cover personality, Anthony Anderson articulates this well when he said: “We’re not always gonna get everything right, and we’re not always gonna get everything wrong. But, as parents, we’re always gonna want to do better, be better.” That’s the premise of Anderson’s hit show, black-ish, and it’s also the motto many parents—including myself—live by. On page 34, Anderson chats candidly about how the comedy depicts some real-life parenting scenarios, including some of his own. Rejection is part of life and, for many teens, it will come in the form of thin ‘no thank you’ letters from college admission offices. If your child gets a post-secondary pass this spring, learn how to help them cope on page 25. We all get a little stressed now and then and what better way to relax than at the spa? On page 42, we have five of the best spas you PHOTO BY AGNES WYWROT/VYV PHOTOGRAPHIC

need to visit now. And the best part? You can win a gift card so you can try them for free! Find out how on page 42. Lastly, to put some spring in your step, we’ve compiled some fresh looks for the whole family. Check out our fun fashion spread on page 38. I hope you enjoy this issue and I’d love to hear from you. Have an idea for a feature? Have a question for our experts? Email me at Rachel@inbetween.ca. ■

SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS letters@inbetween.ca April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

insight

Raising Dad

ADVICE AND INSIGHT FROM EXPERIENCED PARENTS

The Murphy Family Thomas, 34 Jessica, 34 Terry, 17 Quinn, 11 Rohan, 9

MODERN FAMILY

RAISING A

Transgender by stefanie phillips photography ryan francoz hair & makeup natalia zurawska NATALIA ZURAWSKA/JUDY INC.

Teen

April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Modern Family

After a suicide attempt, self-harm and other troubling behaviour, 17-year-old Terry’s call for help was answered. He was transgender. Now, despite the change in identity, the Murphys finally have their happy teen back. THIS TORONTO, ONT., FAMILY is all about supporting each other and working as a team. Thomas works as a nuclear operator in the assessing department for Ontario Power Generation at the Pickering Nuclear Generating Station, and Jessica works as a customer relations coordinator for TD Canada Trust. Thomas had Terry in a previous relationship when he was just 17, and later started seeing Jessica, whom he later married and had two boys, Quinn and Rohan. With their blended family dynamic, they try to make spending time together a priority by taking frequent family trips to the bookstore and going to Scouts. Despite spending lots of time together, Thomas and Jessica felt distanced from Terry. He began avoiding his friends and family, growing distant and eventually resorted to cutting himself in an attempt at suicide. It took more than four months of counselling sessions, twice a week, for the Murphys to uncover the

root of Terry’s troubling behaviour; he was struggling with his gender identity. Now, nearly two years after coming out as a transgender man, the Murphys are excited to finally have their happy teenager back. ON COMING OUT Jessica: I remember that he was very much into anime and cosplay, so he had already been talking about getting a binder for his breasts. There was a convention thing he wanted to go to, and he wanted to cosplay a male character and didn’t want to have boobs for it. Thomas: I had actually taken him down to Come As You Are (a Toronto adult entertainment store) to get a binder because it is the only place where you can buy one. J: That week, he went to get his hair cut. I came in and asked to see the haircut, thinking it was like a trim, and it was a short, Justin Beiber-esque cut. A little April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Modern Family

longer than how he has it now. He was wearing the binder under his clothes, and he was like, “I’m transgender and I go by Terry now. Are you OK with that?” I asked, “Are you OK with that?” And he said yeah. Initially, I was surprised. J: There was [a period] of barely passing classes, not handing in assignments, having friends but not really hanging out with them, there was the suicide attempt, there was cutting, there was the girl hiding in her

room, not talking to anybody. There were all of these things and, as parents, you’re like, “What do we do?” T: I thought this could actually be the answer to what has been happening. It seemed like he was going down a hole. When he realized who he was, I said “This could take you out (of that hole). That was it. That was the answer. That’s what you’ve struggled with. That’s why you’ve hated wearing dresses and hated going to April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Modern Family

get girl things, because you’ve never been a girl. You just didn’t know it until puberty hit and your body started to change and it started to fight you. This could actually be the solution.” ON SUPPORTING EACH OTHER J: I think what Terry struggled with the most was trying to get everyone to accept him. Even to this day, we have family members who have a hard time using he/him rather than she/her. J: Terry is an odd mix of outgoing but not. If things offend him, he won’t generally call people out on it. In those situations, he’ll just be like, ”oh, it’s he.” But he’ll say it once and then after that if people keep using “she” or “her,” he just kind of closes in and won’t talk to them. I think the biggest struggle for him is that when people do that, he feels like he’s been slapped in the face. ON EXPLAINING TERRY’S GENDER TO QUINN AND ROHAN J: We said, “He goes by Terry and he’s a boy.” And [Quinn and Rohan] went, “OK.” Within a day or two, they were using his new name. To the point that friends and family were finding out, and if [the boys’] friends were over and they were using the wrong pronouns or name, they’d be like, “It’s Terry and he’s a he!” They had no problem whatsoever.

ON ADVICE FOR RAISING A TRANSGENDER CHILD T: Listen to them, talk to them. J: Follow their lead. A lot of the time, they were already thinking about it. So chances are they’ve already looked up where to find stuff. If they want to go on medication, they’ve already looked up medication and options, for the most part. They’ve already looked at operations if that’s what they want. Talk to them and find out if it is enough that they need to buy new clothes. Or ask them, “Do you want to go see doctors?” or “Do you want to get into clinics?” T: That’s one thing we made clear to Terry. Medicine doesn’t move that fast. You will be on a waiting list and it will take you at least six months to start seeing these processes. Take the time to really determine that this is what you want. Now that we’ve waited, he’s found that yes; he’s more fluid than full-out male. He’s put it at 90 per cent male and 10 per cent female. But some days, he’ll feel more feminine and will dress that way. J: Find a support group and talk to other people who have gone through it. As parents, you need that because, even as a couple, we react to things differently. This way you can go and you have people in your community that understand. ■ SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS TWEET US at @inbetweenzine April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Raising Dad

by peter carter Peter has four brothers, four sisters, one wife, two daughters and a son, the last three of which all recently graduated from teenagehood with all their limbs and sanity intact. According to Carter: “If you can’t use your family as a petri dish for life, what else you gonna do with ’em?”

Winning WINNING Want totoknow when Want know when you’ve you’ve earned big parenting points? Gage itpoints? by earned big parenting how much your teens mock you. Gage it by how much your teens mock you.

April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

WAS MIDWAY DOWN the snowy slope. At the bottom, about half a football field away, were my three teenaged skiers. It was March break and they, as usual, had completed the run before me. While I may have been a klutz on the slopes, at least I was on the slopes. And I credit my kids for getting me out there. Skiing, something I now love, is a sport I wouldn’t have tried had it not been for them. Growing up in Sudbury, Ont., skiing eluded me. As a teenager, I was jealous of the kids who wore those cool little wire tags on their jackets after March break. I grew up thinking downhill skiing was the preserve of the privileged. (Weird, I know, but true.) Then came my own family. First the twins, and then Michel. One day, when they were in their early teens, the kids wanted to give skiing a shot. I agreed and joined them. At first, we were all at skiing 101 level, but then they started improving faster. Until one day, as is true with pretty much everything else, they got way better than me. It happens all the time. One day, you’re showing your cute little preschoolers how to play chess and letting let them win; three

Raising Dad

games later, they have you in checkmate three moves in. My kids leave me in their dust with regularity. But I digress. That one memorable day I had stopped for a breather when I glanced down to see 14-year-old Michel falling, flailing and weaving around, his ski poles poking in every direction. He looked like an out-of-control robot with really long slender feet. Think C-3PO breakdancing. His sisters thought it was a hoot. I could hear their laughter from up the hill. When I finally skied down and asked what was so funny, Ewa reported sheepishly, “Michel was showing us how you ski, Dad.” A similar thing happened to my friend Rodney. He had teenage sons and a very musical family. One afternoon, he heard someone in the next room, banging away on the family piano. He said it sounded strained and clumsy; whoever was playing was demolishing a 12-bar blues pattern. It hurt his ears. Rodney entered the room and his younger son Andrew was sitting on the piano bench, his elder brother was standing next to him, laughing. Turns out Andrew was demonstrating “how Dad plays rock ‘n’ roll.” This gets me to wondering: what does it all April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Cart

Raising Dad

mean? Is the fact that our kids are making fun of us to our faces a bad thing? Nope. It means Rodney and I—and any other moms and dads who get teased by their kids—win parenting. Our kids are so confident that we have their backs and are so sure that we love them that they make fun of us. I am so happy I’m a parent in modern-day Canada. It’s easy to imagine a time and place where young people would simply be afraid to poke fun at their folks. I sure didn’t when I was their age. It’s not that my parents would have punished us. It’s just that teasing Mom or Dad would have been so far removed from the realm of possibility to be conceivable. But today? In my house? It’s a synonym for love. Then there’s this: You already know that sometimes, when it comes to your teenagers, you are nothing more than an unpaid Sherpa and a social liability. Exhibit A: You’re driving your darling 14-year-old to a concert and she’ll have her best friend with her—a kid you’ve probably watched grow up—in the backseat. They’re talking about what great tickets they have and you chime in with, “I remember once at an Oasis concert when I was...” and before you get another syllable out, a condescending voice from the back puts you in your place. “Oh Mo-o-m,” it says. (An embarrassed teenager, BTW, has the ability to stretch ‘mom’ out to four syllables.) “That is so-o-o not what we’re talking about.”

So you, firmly schooled, shut up and keep driving. You don’t even mention the fact that you are paying for the concert tickets, chauffeuring your sweet daughter and her buddies to the event, and then, four hours later, after having turned down a glass of Pinot Noir because you have to drive, are heading back into the night to make sure they have a ride home. On said drive home, don’t bother offering an opinion on the concert. Whatever you say will be the wrong thing. What’s worse: even though you vow to not take it personally, you do. You’re like, “Am I really that out of touch?” Newsflash: You’re not. Newsflash the sequel: It happens to all parents. And the fact is, if your kids weren’t sure of your love, they’d never risk contradicting you. They know they wouldn’t talk to somebody outside the family that way. Remember a few paragraphs ago when I talked about my kids mercilessly ridiculing the way I ski? Combine that with the fact that I get to be— depending on the time of day—their resident gopher, personal concierge and/or human, fully stocked ATM and what do you get? I call it “unconditionally being taken for granted.” It’s a sign that I’ve made it as a parent. I’ve won this thing! ■ HAVE A COMMENT FOR PETER? Tweet him at @Petesbandg April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

10 Minutes With

10 MINUTES WITH

J.C.

MacKenzie He plays Skip Fontaine in the new HBO series, Vinyl, a show about the music scene in the ‘70s. In real life, MacKenzie’s life plays to a different tune—one that has him and his son adjusting to a new life in New York. by lara hyde

J.C. MacKenzie with his son Liam PHOTO COURTESY OF J.C. MACKENZIE

April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

10 Minutes With

YOU’VE SEEN A MARTIN SCORSESE MOVIE (and who hasn’t?), you’ll probably recognize Canadian-born actor, J.C. MacKenzie. He’s appeared in a whopping three films by the legendary director. You might also know him from TV shows Murder One or Dark Angel. Lately, MacKenzie’s been busy juggling parenting with a starring role in the new HBO series, Vinyl. Produced by Mick Jagger and Martin Scorsese, Vinyl depicts the 1970s music scene. To play the role of Skip Fontaine, Mackenzie had to make the move from L.A. to New York with his 11-yearold son in tow. INBETWEEN caught up with MacKenzie to find out how he managed the move and juggles his hectic schedule with parenting his tween son, Liam. You’re clearly a very busy guy and you have an 11-year-old son. How do you make it all work? Well, it’s taxing, I guess you could say. Organizing my life when he’s off school and trying to find ways to keep him active. We just moved to New York from L.A. last spring to do the show (Vinyl), so it’s a brand new school and a brand new city for him. That can be daunting for a kid, so you just treat the situation with kid gloves and make sure they’re safe and happy.

What are some of your favourite things to do together? My son’s a bit of an artist, so a brilliant night for me is just sitting and playing ukulele while he does art. We also go ice skating a lot. We always have. It’s kind of a bizarre sport to get into in L.A., which has a lack of indoor skating rinks, but we found one in Culver City not far from us. In New York, we go to games, we go to plays. I probably destroyed any potential theatre-going life he had by dragging him to every single production of Hamlet when he was five. He was just in torture. Liam is approaching his teen years. Does that make you nervous? He’s already in them, believe me! He’s been rolling his eyes for about two-and-ahalf years now at everything I say. [Adopts his son’s voice] “Please do not talk to my friends. Don’t say anything. I know you think you’re cool, but you’re not. You’re so annoying,” and on and on. Yeah, he’s a typical kid, but I like embarrassing him. Does Liam being a teenager make me nervous? If he was anything like me, I would say yes, but he’s focused and disciplined and wants to do his homework. Fifteen was the most challenging year for me, so I don’t know…talk to me in four years! Is there anything you’re looking forward to about the teenage years? April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

10 Minutes With

I love this period of time. There is such an innocence about kids at this age. They still want to be with you. I know that’s going to be different in a few years, so I just try to cherish this time. Growing up is bittersweet. How would you describe your parenting style? Very, very loose. Probably too loose! [Laughs] I let a lot of sh*t go. I’m not perfect, believe me. But—and I don’t mean to sound Pollyanna-ish—it’s very, very rewarding. I really love being a parent. Yeah. It’s so cool. Five years from now, what do you hope for your son? I just want him to do whatever he wants to do. My parents had pretty low expectations—I was such a troubled kid—but they were cool. They always supported me no matter what. That’s what I want to do for Liam. As long as he’s happy, that’s what matters. He can be a garbage man if that’s what he wants. You’re in the new Martin Scorsese/Mick Jagger HBO series Vinyl about the music scene in New York in the 1970s. Can you tell us a bit about that? I play Skip Fontaine, the head of sales and one of three senior partners at a record company called American Century. Bobby Cannavale and Ray Romano play the other senior partners. I can tell you that this was bar-none the best cast I ever worked with.

“I don’t mean to sound Pollyanna-ish— it’s very, very rewarding.” Right from Bobby down to the guy who had one line, it was just a seamless group of actors that both Martin Scorsese and his casting director, Ellen Lewis, assembled. This is the fourth time you’ve worked with Martin Scorsese. The two of you must be pretty fond of each other. Yeah. [Laughs] He still scares me, so I don’t ruffle his hair or anything, but he’s got a great sense of humour. He’s just a gem of a guy to work with. Very talented, knows what he’s doing with the camera, and that’s complemented by this very free and improvisational style that he encourages when you’re working with him. You first discovered your love for theatre when you were in university. What were you studying before you switched gears to acting? I was studying drama in education. It was a lovely introduction to acting because I wasn’t interested in acting at all. The course was geared more around improvisation and play, so it was a nice, liberating place to exercise your April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

10 Minutes With

On the set of HBO’s new series, Vinyl

spontaneity. Then I auditioned for a drama school in England on a whim and got in, and that’s when I thought, “I’ll give this a shot.” I really thank my father for that year. It was very, very expensive. But that was what turned me around. London has the most incredible theatre and that was the real lesson—not necessarily the stuff I learned in school. Does your son have any interest in acting? Is it something you would encourage? He was just in a production of Romeo and Juliet. He played a guard. I saw every performance of it. I think he had four lines. I don’t really know if he has any interest in that. If he does, I don’t suspect it’ll come out until a little later, and that’s fine. In L.A., there were kids in his class who were going out for commercials and I really didn’t want that. Both his mother and I thought that was a bad idea. PHOTO COURTESY OF HBO

I just want him to have the experience of a childhood. If, when he grows up, he wants to do it, I’ll fully support it, but I personally think it’s weird to get a kid involved with professional acting at such a young age. You divide your time between L.A. and New York, but you’re originally from Ottawa. What feels most like home to you? For me, New York has always felt like home. I first came down here when I was 17, alone, and it felt scary. But if you have a group of friends, there’s no better place to be as a young person. There’s nothing more exciting. Having said that, there’s nothing more expensive—but I can’t stand the suburbs, so this to me is really comfortable. I need people. I’m very, very happy here. ■ Watch Vinyl on HBO Sundays at 9 pm ET/MT April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

inFORM

Raising Dad

WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW FOR YOUR TODAY AND THEIR TOMORROW

NEWS BRIEFS

don’t... DISCUSS

DIETING WITH YOUR DAUGHTER NEW RESEARCH SUGGESTS that mothers need to be careful when it comes to discussing weight and dieting with their daughters. The study, conducted by researchers at the University of Notre Dame, observed girls in Grades 6 to 8, along with their mothers. After studying the way both groups discussed diets and weight loss, researchers found that girls who were engaging in conversations about losing weight with their mothers were at a higher risk of developing an eating disorder. They also found the children with the least body image issues were raised in homes where the mother didn’t talk about weight or dieting. April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Raising News Briefs Dad

KIDS HAVE MORE SCREEN TIME THAN

SLEEP TIME

According to research by Common Sense Media, an organization that rates, educates, and advocates for kids, families, and schools, teens are spending approximately nine hours a day using various forms of media—that’s more time than they spend sleeping. The study, which observed 2,600 teens across the U.S., included questions about teenagers’ TV and movie-viewing habits, as well as time spent playing video games, reading, listening to music and checking social media. When it comes to screen time, teens spend more than six and a half hours a day consuming media using their laptops, tablets and cellphones. The study also showed that half of teens say they “often” or “sometimes” use social media or watch TV while doing homework.

VAPING LEADS TO CIGARETTE USE

Vaping (smoking e-cigarettes) can be a gateway to tobacco use, said researchers of a study published in the British Medical Journal. After questioning 2,000 Hawaiian students in Grades 9 and 10 about their e-cigarette and traditional cigarette use, researchers found that students who smoked the electronic version were over three times more likely to smoke traditional cigarettes than students who didn’t. Of those studied, a whopping 68 per cent considered vaping to be healthier than smoking traditional cigarettes.

SUBSTANCE ABUSE IS ON THE DECLINE There has been a decrease in the number of teens who drink, smoke or use illegal drugs, found a 2014 study by the US National Institute on Drug Abuse Monitoring. According to the research, American teenagers’ use of illegal prescription drugs, alcohol and other illegal street drugs is at its lowest level since these surveys began in 2013. The only drug use that hasn’t declined among teenagers is marijuana, wherein 21 per cent of Grade 12 students admitted to smoking weed. ■ April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Ask the Expert

by kimberly moffit Kimberly Moffit is one of Canada’s most experienced relationship experts and provides practical advice about parenting and psychological topics. She’s a regular speaker for Queen’s University’s MBA and Women in Leadership Programs, and a frequent lecturer at the University of Waterloo. Kimberly also makes regular TV appearances on shows including CTV’s Canada AM, CBC’s The National, City TV News and Global TV’s Morning Show.

My son left his phone unlocked and I saw a conversation between him and his girlfriend about meeting up for sex. I had no clue my son was even having sex and I’m freaked out a little! Do I send his Dad to have the condom talk with him or should I do it? What’s going to be less awkward? And if it’s me, how do I start the conversation? I can’t tell him I read his phone!

A. FIRST AND FOREMOST, as a parent, you have ev-

ery right to regularly monitor your child’s phone conversations, social media, and email accounts, for the primary purpose of protecting their safety. Many parents taper their monitoring as their teens get older, as they begin April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Ask the Expert

to understand their teen’s individual personality, and as the trust develops. So yes, it’s definitely acceptable to tell him that you saw his phone unlocked and saw the conversation, and that you read it because you were concerned. Having the birds and bees conversation with your kids is NEVER easy, whether you have a son or a daughter. Sex education is more improved in today’s school curriculum than ever, but parents, this does not mean it replaces a conversation with you. So you’re not off the hook! Choose a neutral location, like the dinner table or the family room, as opposed to your child’s bedroom or in the car on the way to a lesson, which will prevent your child from feeling cornered or forced into the conversation.

Start the talk promptly by saying something like, “Son, I saw your texts about sex with Lisa yesterday.” Keep the tone positive and non-accusatory. After all, the deed has been done (no pun intended) and there’s nothing you can do to reverse history. All you can do is give your son the best education possible to help him make informed choices in his life. There’s no doubt that this may be an awkward conversation. Your son may be embarrassed, but underneath it all, he will know that you care. After the talk, feel free to have a celebratory high five with your husband to acknowledge getting through this challenging milestone! Good luck! ■ HAVE A QUESTION FOR KIMBERLY? info@inbetween.ca April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Gap Year

MIND THE

GAP For many, taking a year off between high school and post-secondary education is a rite of passage, but is it right for your kid? by stefanie phillips

April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

W HEN KIRAN KHALID FINISHED GRADE 12 at her high school in Brampton, Ont., she didn’t go straight into university along with the majority of her friends. Instead, she took a year off to work a part-time retail job and visit family in Pakistan. Her parents supported her decision to take a year off, but encouraged her to apply to universities before she left. “I initially told my parents that I would take a year off and then I would go [to school],” she said. “I knew I was going to go next year. There was no rush.” After applying to Ryerson University in Toronto and Brock University in St. Catharine’s, Ont., in January, Khalid left for vacation. While there, she was accepted to both universities and decided to come back to Canada at the end of May. Once home, she started working and applying for Ontario Student Assistance Program to help pay for tuition. Now at Ryerson University studying psychology, Khalid is happy with her decision

Gap Year

to take a gap year. “I honestly could not be more grateful and I think that’s why I’m so appreciative of school, because I’m not being pushed into it.” Khalid is not alone. According to a 2008 Statistics Canada study, 30 per cent of Canadian high school students took more than four months off before starting a post-secondary education. And while some parents may not see the value in enrolling in school if their child isn’t sure it’s what they want to do, others may feel like any education is better than nothing at all. Either way, you can’t force a person to learn, so if your teen put the brakes on school, here’s what you should know.

THE CASE FOR TAKING A GAP YEAR Psychologist and author Sara Dimerman advises parents to refrain from pushing their teenager into a degree right after high school. From her experience, teens that are pushed into school often end up hating their degree and finishing no further ahead than when they graduated high school. Case in point: a 2008 study by the Canadian Education Project, an education policy and research association, found that 38 per cent of college or university students drop out April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Gap Year

or change minors at some point in their undergraduate academic career. Although the numbers can’t be linked to parents forcing their teens to enroll in a program they’re not sure about, it does show that more teens might need a little more time to figure out what they want to do.

TALKING TO YOUR TEEN If your teenager comes home asking to take a year off before pursuing a post-secondary education, Dimerman says you should sit down and have a discussion with them to understand why they want to take time off. “If parents are open with their children and

encourage an open communication…then teenagers may be more inclined to go back to some type of education—even if it’s not what the parent wants for them exactly.” Since most concerns come from parents believing their teen lacks the life experience or foresight to understand how a gap year might affect them, parents should give their teens a chance to explain themselves. Dimerman suggests that parents start the conversation by asking their teenager to “convince” them why a gap year would be beneficial. By doing so, parents can see what their teen really needs, whether it’s a chance to travel, work, complete an internship or April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Gap Year

A parent whose teen isn’t particularly strong academically might be more hesitant towards the idea of a gap year. take a mental health break. After discussing their reasoning, parents can make a pros and cons list with their teen. The conversation should end with a consensus agreement. “You want to make sure that your teenager has a voice, he has a say, that he’s able to communicate what he wants and why.”

THE CASE AGAINST TAKING A GAP YEAR Another main concern Dimerman hears from parents about gap years is that their teenager won’t want to go back to school for a higher education once they get a taste of making money. She recommends that parents vocalize this concern in the open discussion, and they “might get some reassurance that it may or may not happen.” A parent whose teen isn’t particularly strong academically might be more hesitant towards the idea of a gap year. She recommends those parents suggest alternatives to taking a whole year off, such as giving the teen a chance to not work over the summer and enjoy more of a break. WHAT TO DO WHEN YOUR TEEN DECIDES TO TAKE A GAP YEAR Once the decision has been made and your teen has decided to take some time off

school, Dimerman suggests parents lay down some guidelines and ground rules to encourage them to be productive. This might include working to contribute to household expenses, like paying for a phone bill or insurance that they weren’t before. Dimerman says the amount a teen is contributing needs to be weighed against how much they are earning and what else they are spending their money on. If the teen wants to travel, parents can make it clear that they will have to fund the trip himself, or at least a portion of it. Everything should be discussed ahead of time so that the teen is fully aware of the situation. If the terms of the agreement are not being met, it can be frustrating as a parent, but this doesn’t mean you should hand out ultimatums. Instead, Dimerman says parents should initiate another open discussion to talk about consequences, including taking away an allowance, increasing or adding to their household contributions or introducing a rent cost. That way, your child will know you’re serious about how much you value their promise to go back to school—whether it’s next semester or next year. ■ WOULD YOU SUPPORT A GAP YEAR? Facebook.com/inbetweenmagazine/ April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Rejection

entry

DENIED How to help your teen deal with postsecondary school rejection. by shandley mcmurray April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Rejection

Rejection sucks at any age. Yes, it’s an important lesson to learn. Yes, it helps kids to grow, become stronger and develop determination. But no matter how positively you look at it, being turned down can take a chunk out of your teen’s self-esteem. “Rejection is a part of life and it is always a possibility, especially when dealing with competitive schools and programs,” says Halifax psychologist Andrea Cook. And with many high school graduates applying for their dream college or university, it’s bound to happen at least once. When it does, it’s important to stay calm and let your child take the driver’s seat. Here’s how.

START PLANNING EARLY Sit down with your teen a year before applications are due. Look at her grades, interests and career goals to decide where best to apply. If your kid struggles academically, Harvard may not be the most realistic choice—despite the fact that her mother and grandfather are distinguished alumni. “Being realistic from the start and having appropriate goals for the future sets the student up for success rather than failure,” says Cook. Apply to four or five schools with one guaranteed option to be safe, she recommends. HAVE A BACKUP PLAN Whether your child intends to work, volunteer

or go back to school; you need a Plan B in case things don’t work out the way you’d hoped. Getting a job in the industry your child hopes to work in can prove beneficial to getting into a program the following year, says Cook. “Some experience in the field often indicates to institutions that the student is serious about the coursework they are about to pursue.” LET YOUR TEEN OPEN THE LETTER Resist the urge to tear open the school’s envelope when it arrives. Instead, let your child decide if he wants to read the news first. “For many, this is their first step into adult life,” Cook says. It’s important for them to deal with the news first-hand. April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Rejection

HAVE YOUR KID CALL THE ADMISSIONS DEPARTMENT This is your child’s education. It’s up to her to follow up with the school if she isn’t accepted. Let her calm down before placing the call to find out why she wasn’t accepted. The information could help her on future applications. Plus, Cook says, post-secondary schools frown upon parents who contact them on their child’s behalf. “This just demonstrates that the student is not ready to take their education into their own hands and does not encourage maturity and responsibility,” she says. You can role play before the call or proofread follow-up letters, but don’t take the lead on contacting the school.

DON’T FLUFF IT OFF It’s tempting to say something soothing like, “Everything happens for a reason” or “Everything will work out in the end,” but that’s not realistic, says Cook. “Rejection stings and [kids] need to hear that their parents understand their pain and that they will be emotionally supported through their journey, even if it is temporarily delayed.” Rejection offers kids a chance to persevere—a trait that will come in handy during adulthood.

KEEP THEM OCCUPIED It’s easy to let things like schoolwork slide when battling the bite of rejection. Keep kids focused on short-term goals, such as the next science test, family holiday or upcoming prom. That way they’ll realize life doesn’t end with rejection, it just steers things in a different direction. “There’s something to that time-honoured saying, ‘If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again,’” says Cook. Rejection hurts, but dealing with it in an appropriate and healthy way can help your teen mature and work harder for future goals. ■ HAVE TIPS ON HOW TO DEAL WITH REJECTION? Tweet us @inbetweenzine April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

inSPIRE

Raising Dad

LIVING YOUR BEST LIFE

CHOPPED SALAD WITH BUTTERMILK-DILL DRESSING

RECIPES

TWIN CHEFS LILLY AND AUDREY ANDREWS

WANT TO INSPIRE OTHER KIDS TO SPICE UP THEIR KITCHENS.

April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Twin Chefs

it up

FOURTEEN-YEAR-OLD TWINS Lilly and Audrey Andrews aren’t big fans of sitting still. Instead of wasting hours in front of a computer screen, these cheerful blondes prefer to spend time in a place most teens dread—the kitchen. From vegetarian chili to parmesan veggie biscuits, the girls’ tasty treats have made them a hit with kids and parents alike. Known as the Twin Chefs, Lilly and Audrey have whipped up healthy dishes on Good Morning America and Entertainment Tonight. They even created a vegan sandwich for The Ellen Show. They have also published a cookbook called We Heart Cooking. Lilly and Audrey sat down with INBETWEEN to tell us why cooking is an important skill to learn when you’re young, and how parents can inspire their teens.

WHEN DID YOU FIRST RECOGNIZE YOUR LOVE OF COOKING? Audrey: We got into cooking when we were around three or four years old. As children, we saw our parents cooking and watched cooking shows on TV. This made us really curious and motivated us to try it out for ourselves. I remember one of the first things we tried making was eggplant. Even though we just sautéed it with some olive oil and spices, we thought it was incredible. April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Twin Chefs

MINI TURKEY MEATLOAVES April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Twin Chefs

WHAT INSPIRES YOU TO COOK NUTRITIOUS DISHES? Lilly: The Bay Area in San Francisco is a great place for healthy food. It was what we grew up eating and we loved it. If healthy food can taste amazing, why bother with unhealthy foods? Our garden is another great place to look for some dish inspiration. There’s just an incredible feeling that comes when you eat the food that you’ve grown and cooked. WHICH TWIN IS BETTER IN THE KITCHEN? Audrey: I think we work better together in the kitchen. Alone we do alright, but when we work together, things get done quickly and the product turns out better. Four hands are better than two! Honestly, Lilly is better at tasting and adjusting to the right flavours, while I’m a little better at chopping and measuring ingredients. HOW DID YOUR PARENTS INFLUENCE YOUR COOKING? Audrey: Our parents are good in the kitchen and it’s their home-cooked meals that first inspired us to start cooking. Without them, we wouldn’t be where we are today. It’s also great to have someone who can reach all of the pots and pans that may be too high. (Thanks, Dad!)

DO YOU STILL TAKE COOKING ADVICE FROM YOUR PARENTS? Audrey: Our dad will always be the best baker. I find it a bit tedious and I find that it’s easier to be creative when making savory dishes. But everything he bakes is so incredible, so if I ever have an idea for a recipe that involves baking, I always consult him. HOW CAN PARENTS GET THEIR KIDS INTERESTED IN COOKING? Lilly: One of the best ways to get your kids interested in cooking is [to let] them pick any recipe they want, and then make it with them. This will get them excited about trying something new, not to mention you can share some quality time together. WHY IS IT IMPORTANT FOR KIDS TO LEARN HOW TO COOK? Audrey: I strongly believe that the earlier you start healthy habits, the more likely they are to last. If your child starts eating healthy food at a young age, they should be used to it by the time they’re cooking for themselves. DO YOU HAVE PLANS TO PUBLISH ANOTHER BOOK? Lilly: I hope so! We love creative writing. It’s another one of our main passions. We’ve thought of quite a few food-related adventures. Who knows what’s to come? April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Twin Chefs

TRY THESE RECIPES FROM LILLY AND AUDREY

CHOPPED SALAD WITH BUTTERMILK-DILL DRESSING SERVES 6

Do you like to have a little bit of everything on your fork at once? That’s the point of a chopped salad! The bite-sized ingredients make it easy to get everything in one bite. To-go tip: Pack your dressing separately and add it right before you eat. DRESSING 1/2 small avocado 2 green onions 1/4 cup fat-free Greek yogurt 1/2 cup low-fat buttermilk (1%) 1 tbsp chopped fresh dill 2 tsp Dijon mustard 2 tsp sherry vinegar 1/2 tsp salt 1/4 tsp freshly ground black pepper SALAD 1 head romaine lettuce 1 yellow bell pepper 1 cucumber 2 carrots 1 pint cherry tomatoes

3/4 cup canned chickpeas (garbanzo beans), rinsed and drained 1/3 cup toasted sunflower seeds or toasted pumpkin seeds DRESSING Cut avocado in half, remove the pit and scoop the avocado in a blender or food processor. Trim and coarsely chop green onions, then add to avocado along with yogurt, buttermilk, dill, mustard, vinegar, salt and pepper. Blend until smooth. Pour dressing into a container with a lid. Cover and refrigerate until ready to serve. SALAD Separate lettuce leaves from

head. Stack leaves, cut crosswise into slices, then chop. Place in a large serving bowl. Cut bell pepper in half through stem. Remove stem, seeds, and ribs. Chop pepper and add to bowl. Peel cucumber and carrots, then chop and add to bowl. Cut tomatoes into quarters and add to bowl. Add chickpeas and seeds to bowl. Toss gently to mix all ingredients. Add dressing to salad and toss to coat. Serve immediately.

April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Twin Chefs

TRY THESE RECIPES FROM LILLY AND AUDREY

MINI TURKEY MEATLOAVES SERVES 6

When we decided meatloaf needed a makeover, we went straight for our muffin tins. Yup, you heard us—mini turkey meatloaves in muffin tins! This underestimated weeknight dish is now totally ready for Instagram.

INGREDIENTS 1/2 small onion 2 pounds ground turkey 1/2 cup old-fashioned rolled oats 1/2 cup grated Parmesan cheese 2 large eggs 2 tbsp 1% low-fat milk 2 tbsp chopped fresh parsley 2 garlic cloves, minced 1/2 tsp red pepper flakes 1/2 tsp ground black pepper 1/2 tsp salt 3/4 cup ketchup 1/4 cup barbecue sauce 6 slices center-cut bacon Cooking spray

PREHEAT oven to 350°F. Finely chop onion. (You should have about 1/2 cup.) Combine onion with ground turkey, oats, and Parmesan cheese in a large bowl. Mix well with your hands to distribute ingredients evenly. In a small bowl, combine eggs, milk, parsley, garlic, red pepper flakes, pepper, and salt, stirring with a whisk. Pour egg mixture over turkey and mix with your hands until combined. LIGHTLY COAT each cup of a 12-cup muffin tin with cooking spray. Place an equal amount of turkey mixture into each cup, filling each cup full.

MIX ketchup and barbecue sauce in a small bowl. Spoon evenly over turkey mixture, dividing it equally. Top with bacon, cutting each strip in half crosswise to distribute equally over muffin cups. BAKE until a meat thermometer inserted into centre(s) reaches 165°F, about 35 minutes. Turn oven to broil. Broil 6 inches from heat for 3 to 5 minutes or until bacon is crisp and browned. Remove from oven and let sit 10 minutes before serving. ■

April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Anthony Anderson COVER STORY

ART IMITATES LIFE Creating hit comedy black-ish has turned into a family affair for star Anthony Anderson and his teens. by crystal wood

April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Anthony Anderson

They say... ART IMITATES LIFE, and that’s pretty obvious on ABC’s hit comedy black-ish (which airs on City in Canada). The show often mirrors Anthony Anderson’s life as a dad to son Nathan, 15, and daughter Kyra, 19, and offers parents a hilarious look at everyday problems like bullying and sexuality. Anderson’s character, Dre Johnson, is a successful advertising executive and father to four kids who finds himself caught between wanting the best for his children and reminding them of challenges he faced at their age. Now in its second season, black-ish has been well-received by critics and audiences since its 2014 premiere. It has won several awards, including two NAACP Image Awards for Outstanding Comedy, two NAACP Image Awards for Anderson’s role on the series and an Emmy nomination for Outstanding Lead Actor in a Comedy Series for Anderson’s performance. Anderson’s favourite part about the show: its success at helping parents deal with difficult situations. “People walk up to me and they say, ‘This is what we’re going through right now, and I learned how to deal with it by watching your show,’” he says. “They never would have thought to say something to their son or daughter, but

because of Dre and how he dealt with it, they were able to have that dialogue with their child. So, it’s extremely gratifying. To tell these stories, and to have them be so well-received by the public, it’s just a beautiful thing.” Anderson sat down with INBETWEEN to chat about how playing a parent on black-ish has opened his eyes to just how universal raising teenagers can be. “You know, we’re not always gonna get everything right, and we’re not always gonna get everything wrong,” he says. “But as parents, we’re always gonna want to do better, be better.”

PARENTING GOES GLOBAL “It’s crazy. Parents come up to me and say, ‘When did you guys put cameras in my house? This is my life!’” Anderson says. “And that’s gratifying because it shows that [the show is] resonating with everyone across the board, and, even though our show has a very specific point of view, what we deal with is universal.” The show also helps Anderson deal with his own parenting milestones, including when his daughter started dating a boy of a different race. “I just assumed he was gonna be a little April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Anthony Anderson

Anthony Anderson as Dre Johnson on black-ish

young brother who plays basketball, but when he came home to visit for the first time, I opened the door and he was a Latino. That turned into the episode ‘Andre from Marseille’ where Zoey dates a white French boy. Dre says, ‘Where is that? Is that near Compton?’”

HOW TO EMBARRASS YOUR KIDS “Using my family as a source [for the show], they appreciate it. They enjoy it,” Anderson says of including his kids when discussing ideas. “We get to sit down and strategize and talk about what ends up on the show.” Sometimes, though, the content of blackish can prove to be a bit embarrassing. “There was this sex talk episode where Dre catches his son masturbating,” Anderson says. “My son’s 15 years old, so everybody knows he’s going through that in real life. He had to deal with the fallout in school, and his friends were like, ‘Yo, did this stuff really happen?’ He was like, ‘No, it wasn’t me!’” PHOTO ©2016 ABC STUDIOS / KELSEY MCNEAL

KEEP THE LINES OF COMMUNICATION OPEN Anderson doesn’t just believe in honesty when it comes to storylines for his show; it’s also how he communicates with his children. “[When the kids were young], I established a relationship with my children where they could come to me and talk to me about whatever it is that they had on their mind,” he says. While his kids have always responded well to his no-holds-barred approach to communication, Anderson admits that their mother, Alvina, prefers a softer style of parenting. The result: Nathan and Kyra tend to turn to Mom when things get emotional. “Sometimes, just because it’s of a personal nature, they feel their mother is more nurturing,” he says. “So, they may go to their mother before they come to me.” LIKE FATHER, LIKE SON One thing that Nathan will always talk to his dad about is acting. The 15-year-old, who April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Anthony Anderson

stars in the Netflix series Richie Rich, seems set to follow in his father’s artistic footsteps. He’s even appeared in a guest-starring role on black-ish, something Anderson has been hoping for since the show’s creation. “I wanted my son to come on and be Andre Junior [Dre’s son] for real,” Anderson says. “Unfortunately, he did not get the role. He understood, because he’s a young actor, but we were able to bring him on later as a relative.” Anderson says co-starring with his son on that episode was a fulfilling experience. “It was a very proud moment for me, as his father, knowing that this is something that he decided that he wanted to do on his own,” Anderson says. “To sit back and work with my son, and to watch him work on his own. He’s put in the work to be a great actor.”

fact, he says, they might be more prepared to leave home than he is for them to go. When they dropped Kyra off at college, Anderson says he was more emotional than anyone. At one point, he recounts, “My daughter was like, ‘OK, you’ve got to leave now.’ She was ready to be independent.” Even though he’s proud to have raised independent children, Anderson admits that he’s happy to still have Nathan at home—a situation he doesn’t think will change anytime soon. “My son, on the other hand, we’ll probably have to kick him out of the house,” he laughs.

“To sit back and work with my son, and to watch him work on his own. He’s put in the work to be a great actor.”

LEAVING THE NEST Anderson’s daughter, Kyra, left home recently to achieve a degree in social work at the University of San Diego. When faced with the empty space she left at home, Anderson found it more difficult to accept than he’d believed. “My children have always been independent,” he says. “We raised them to be free thinkers, and independent of us.” In

WHAT THE FUTURE HOLDS Now that his children are older and don’t require as much care, Anderson is able to devote more time to his creative projects, which include the film Barbershop: The Next Cut and an updated version of the classic TV game show To Tell the Truth. As for black-ish, Anderson hopes to continue working on his show for a long time. “Hopefully black-ish will keep me busy for at least another five years,” he says. ■ black-ish airs Wednesdays at 9:30pm ET/PT on City and ABC. April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Spring Fashion

FAMILY STYLE GUIDE

Spring into the season with these fresh looks for the whole family. by jordana handler

LIGHTEN UP THIS SPRING WITH BREEZY PASTELS. WHETHER YOU MIX ONE COLOUR IN DIFFERENT SHADES OR PAIR YOUR FAVOURITE COLOUR WITH NEUTRALS, YOU’RE SURE TO STEP OUT IN STYLE. April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Spring Fashion

FOR MOM Mom, weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve got you covered for whatever your day brings. Blush and pink tones add a feminine touch to spring must-have denim styles.

1 2

3 4

5 4

1 Danskin French Terry Open Cardi, $24, walmart.ca 2 Flower Necklace, $35, additionelle.com 3 Halford White Bliss, $220, fidelitydenim.com 4 Tassel Cross Body Bag, $40, express.com 5 Camps Sandals, $55, aldo.ca

1 Florentin Sunglasses, $98, toms.ca 2 Ryder Jacket Dark Vintage, $198, fidelitydenim.com 3 Crepe Blouse, $50, lechateau.com 4 Sloan Fit Garment Dye Utility Ankle Fit Pant, $110, bananarepublic.ca 5 Lace Up Flat, $50, express.com

April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Spring Fashion

TEEN GIRL Take a page from the 70s and try a boho-inspired look with a modern edge.

Adding a white fashion sneaker is a great way to make any look cool and clean.

4 3

1 Ribbed Crop Tank, $44, hm.com/ca 2 Off the Shoulder Blouse, $50, lechateau.com 3 Kitty Sunglasses, $159, toms.ca 4 Saffron Newport Jeans, $208, fidelitydenim.com 5 Unigodien Sandal, $50, callitspring.com

1 Honeycomb Mesh Cropped Tank, $50, express.com 2 Cotton Crew Neck Longsleeve, $15, walmart.ca 3 Axl Short, $168. fidelitydenim.com 4 Handa Backpack, $330. ecco.com 5 Amalthia Sneaker, $130, geox.com

April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Spring Fashion

FOR DAD TEEN BOY Blue khakis and a cozy cardigan are perfect for a dad who knows how to look good and enjoy those sunny weekends. 1

Take the jeans and T-shirt look to the next level by adding some awesome shades. 1

2 3

3 4 5

1 Essential T-shirt, $20, gap.ca 2 Toggle Shawl Zip Cardigan $128, express.com 3 Slim Fit Khakis, $70, gap.ca 4 Maverick Sunglasses, $139, toms.ca 5 Giona

1 Kilgor Gunmetal Sunglasses, $139, toms.ca 2 George Baseball T-shirt, $13, walmart.ca 3 George Jeans, $18, walmart.ca 4 Mick Sneaker, $110, aldo.ca

Moccasin, $180, Geox.com

April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

inDULGE

FOSTERING YOUR HEALTH, BODY AND RELATIONSHIP

win

WE’RE GIVING AWAY GIFT CERTIFICATES TO EACH OF THESE SPAS!

to win one, visit

INBETWEEN.CA/ CONTESTS

SPA SPECIAL

Unwind 5 SPAS YOU NEED TO TRY NOW

April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Spa Special

Holtz Holtz Spa 45 Rideau St. Ottawa, Ont. 613-241-7770/ 1-877-241-8889 holtzspa.com

win

SPA

A $100 GIFT CERTIFICATE! visit INBETWEEN.CA/ CONTESTS

NESTLED in a historic building just steps from Parliament Hill in Ottawa, Holtz Spa is truly a world-class destination spa where you can expect the pampering to begin as soon as you walk through the doors. Holtz Spa offers a wide range of services that feature a unique blend of eastern healing therapies and traditional western bodywork techniques to enhance the spa experience. Don’t leave without trying one of the spa’s aromatherapy massages, pampering treatments that help to reduce stress and boost mood with the use of essential oils. Looking to rejuvenate your skin? The Ayurvedic Facial uses handmade, organic products to initiate the repair and regeneration of skin cells and bring balance to the body. The facial is followed by traditional Marma energy point therapy and breath work to promote deep relaxation. Be sure to finish off your day with lunch in the Oasis lounge, the spa’s exclusive guest lounge, where you will enjoy beautiful views of the city and globally inspired food catered by nearby Santé restaurant. by chantal gray April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Spa Special

Inn Twenty

ON THE

SPA

Inn on the Twenty Spa 3845 Main Street Jordan, Ont. 1-800-701-8074 innonthetwenty.com

win

A $100 GIFT CERTIFICATE! visit INBETWEEN.CA/ CONTESTS

CARE FOR SOME RIESLING while you wait for your pedicure? Inn on the Twenty Spa offers the epitome of relaxation. Nestled among vineyards in Ontario’s picturesque Niagara valley, this spa is the perfect getaway. Take your partner or pencil in some quality mother-daughter time. The spa specializes in vinotherapeutic services—treatments that use wine by-products (yes, wine!) to heal and rejuvenate the body. From traditional massages and body wraps to Reiki or a lesson on couples massage, you’ll be hard-pressed to find something you don’t like. They even offer a youth facial geared to teens. Our personal fave? The Sea Water Mineral Infusion Facial. This treatment is a must try, as much for its incredible smelling customized masks and facial exfoliants as the relaxing light body massage and soothing thermal mud pack you lie on while your skin is getting the royal treatment. While you relax, this facial addresses specific skin needs and infuses the skin with moisturizing, soothing or purifying ingredient formulations. by lara hyde April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

THE SPA

Ritual

Spa Special

win

A $100 GIFT CERTIFICATE! visit INBETWEEN.CA/ CONTESTS

The Spa Ritual 106 Crowfoot Ter. N.W. Calgary, Alta. 403-547-9558 thesparitual.com

THINK THE SPA IS JUST FOR WOMEN? Think again. The Spa Ritual in northwest Calgary is proving that manâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s best friend might just be a manicure or massage away. This Thai-inspired luxury retreat, most recently recognized with a Top Choice Award as the top spa in Calgary for 2015, features a range of site-exclusive treatments that encourage men and women alike to trade the concrete jungle for a day at the spa. Popular services include traditional services, such as hand and foot care rituals, as well as any number of the spa-specific therapeutic and relaxation massages. The Spa Ritual offers a relaxing skin-perfecting body scrub treatment where visitors get to experience a gentle exfoliating full-body scrub that restores their skin, followed by warm infrared lights that both calm and revitalize. A must-see: The Royal Thai Suite that includes a cascading rain shower and Bali Moon Tub. by jamie zachary April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Spa Special

total Wrapture

win

A $100 GIFT CERTIFICATE! visit INBETWEEN.CA/ CONTESTS

MEDI SPA

Total Wrapture Medi Spa N-2255 Ness Ave. Winnipeg, Man. 204-837-9727 totalwrapture.ca

FROM THE OUTSIDE, Total Wrapture Spa doesn’t look like a place that’s designed for luxurious pampering. Located in a strip plaza situated in Winnipeg’s St. James area, one might easily pass it on their travels. But they shouldn’t. Total Wrapture can treat any skin issue, offering up procedures to calm redness and acne as well as preventing wrinkles and lines associated with aging. Its menu is vast and includes everything from laser hair removal, facial peels and acne treatments to manicures, pedicures, massage therapy, sugaring and waxing. Don’t leave without trying the O2 Lift Facial, a luxurious treatment that infuses oxygen, peptides and enzymatic botanicals into the skin. After a relaxing face, scalp and decollete massage, you’re left feeling rejuvenated, refreshed and relaxed. by carol funnell April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

win

Spa Special

A $100 GIFT CERTIFICATE! visit INBETWEEN.CA/ CONTESTS

St. Anne’s

SPA

Ste. Anne’s Spa 1009 Massey Road, Grafton, Ont. 1-888-346-6772 steannes.com

LOCATED JUST A 90-MINUTE DRIVE east of Toronto in Grafton, Ont., Ste. Anne’s Spa is one of the world’s best destination spas. A day at Ste. Anne’s Spa is an event that includes lunch and afternoon tea. While waiting for your treatment, soak in the outdoor hot tubs or swim against the current in the lap pool. Inside, warm up in the hot sauna or the eucalyptus steam room, which is not only relaxing, but can relieve many respiratory symptoms. To complete your Zen, don’t leave without trying the aroma stone massage. This 75-minute treatment uses a unique combination of hot basalt stones and essential oils to loosen and stretch your muscles, gently massaging away tension and stress. On your way home, stop in at the Ste. Anne’s bakery and treat yourself to some gluten-free scones and Devonshire cream. It’s the ultimate indulgence after a day of decadence. by rachel naud ■ April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Your Path To Rejuvenation

Welcome to a world of tranquil pleasure and peacefulness. A sanctuary from everyday life - we inspire sensory journeys that awaken one's senses of contentment with spa treatments based on authentic, holistic rituals inspired by ancient Southeast Asia practices of health and wellness.

403.547.9558 www.thesparitual.com 106 Crowfoot Terrace NW Calgary, AB April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Skin Care

FACE TIME 6 reasons you should get a facial now. by lara hyde April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Skin Care

mom should need an excuse to be pampered, but Mother’s Day is coming up, so why not celebrate your fabulousness with a facial? Did you know that facials offer much more than just an hour of relaxation? They also benefit your health by improving circulation, detoxifying the skin and decreasing stress—which, as we all know, can take a toll on our overall well-being. We spoke with Natalie Kellar, spa director at Ste. Anne’s Spa in Grafton, Ont., to get the scoop on why you should book that spa appointment now.

1. POWERFUL CLEANSING BENEFITS Most facials use some degree of exfoliation, which opens the pores of the skin. This process removes toxins and dead cells from the skin’s surface, resulting in a deep cleanse. Facials also help reduce sebum which, when produced in excess, can lead to oily skin, blackheads and acne. Some treatments also include blackhead extractions. 2. BOOST CIRCULATION As you get older, your skin (like the rest of you) takes longer to recover from everyday stress. Healthy circulation is necessary for all organs to function properly—your skin included. The circulation boost that facials provide promotes the production of new skin cells.

“Facials normally include a significant amount of massage, which also stimulates and improves blood flow,” says Kellar. “This rush of blood to the skin is what gives you a healthy glow and can also reduce the appearance of wrinkles.”

3. YOU’LL LOOK AND FEEL YOUNGER “Taking care of your skin with regular exfoliation and hydration protects [it] from the effects of aging,” says Kellar. While all facials offer some anti-aging benefits, some treatments are more specialized than others. For example, Intense Pulsed Light laser treatments help increase collagen and encourage new cell growth and development. For those seeking more natural alternatives, opt for treatments that combine massage and marine biotechnology or other botanically-derived masks, lotions and oils that promise smoother, firmer, younger-looking skin. 4. RELAXATION It’s no secret that the spa experience is designed to be relaxing, and facial treatments are no exception. “There is no treatment more relaxing than a facial,” says Kellar. “It’s even better than a massage because you don’t have to flip over—you can just sink into the table and relax.” That being said, if you are a fan of massages, some facial treatments include a light back massage. If relaxation is April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

Skin Skincare Care

your No. 1 priority, try a facial using heated massage stones, which help promote circulation and relax muscles.

5. FOR YOUR WELL-BEING Facial treatments increase blood flow, making you feel rejuvenated. The combination of soothing creams, aromatherapy and massage are designed to decrease stress and leave you feeling peaceful and content. Another bonus: positive changes in your skin’s appearance are often immediately noticeable, giving your skin a natural radiance and glow you can’t fake. “Facials help to boost self-esteem,” Kellar says. “When

you look good, you feel good!”

6. CUSTOM MADE FOR YOU Now that you know why you should book a facial, it’s time to choose one that’s right for you. Most spas offer a variety of treatments at various price points, geared to different skin types and personal preferences. Some boast facials specifically designed for men and teens. “There are facials suitable for every skin type,” Kellar says. “The easiest way to choose the right facial for you is to call your spa directly and let them know what you are looking for so they can guide you in the right direction.” ■ April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

escape and give back to yourself this spring... AT C A N A D A’ S FA V O U R I T E S PA

Use promo code “InBetween” for a free wellness class! Book your all-inclusive packages today which includes gourmet meals, $120 spa allowance, complete use of the facilities & more!

www.steannes.com 1.888.346.6772 Just 90 minutes east of Toronto April/May 2016 INBETWEEN 52 Grafton, Ontario

Final Thrill

lovelyLILACS When these delicate flowers bloom shades of pastel, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a sure sign of spring.

April/May 2016 INBETWEEN

YOUR TODAY. THEIR TOMORROW.

FOR PARENT S CAUGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF RAISING A TEEN &

Raising Dad

YOUNG ADUL T

APRIL/MAY 201 6

“MY TEEN TRANSGENIS

ONE FAMILY’S DER” STORY

HOW TO HELP YOUR KID DEAL WITH REJECTION

YOU CAU YOUR TEEGNHT SEXTING

now what?

win

WE’RE GIVING AWAY

$500

ART IMITATES LIFE

WORTH OF SPA GIFT CERTIFICATE S!

FOR ANTH N Y ANDERSONOO BLACK-ISH N

April/May 2016

INBETWEEN

THANK YOU FOR READING! Get a year’s worth of INBETWEEN for just $8.99! Easier to find than ever, INBETWEEN is available for download in the Kobo store, Kindle Amazon store and on inbetween.ca! Get your subscription today!

NOW AVAILABLE EXCLUSIVELY ON:

54 April/May 2016 INBETWEEN FOR PARENTS CAUGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF RAISING A TEEN & YOUNG ADULT