2017 Spring In Recovery Magazine by In Recovery Magazine

Volume 18 Spring 2017

Saving Lives: Oklahoma Governor Mary Fallin Supports Recovery John Lavitt

Third Annual Gratitude Gala:

A Formal Amends Chris Budnick

Comedienne Extraordinaire Dawn Lutrell

Our Biggest Fear Michael DeLeon

$5.99 US/CAN

Finding Recovery in Race and Adversity David Norman

Display until June 1, 2017

From the CEO Jeff Fiorentino

ddiction is a disease. Unfortunately, that truth still does not resonate with most Americans. All too frequently, society blames the person, not the illness. In turn, the addict, powerless to control his urges, all too willingly accepts the shame.

This flawed mindset has greatly contributed to our nation’s current addiction epidemic. Who wants to support treatment and social programs for “derelicts” who can’t control themselves? Who has the courage to seek out treatment when doing so will brand them for life, making it difficult to find jobs and have relationships in our hyper-social media world? This deadly cycle needs to be broken and the message spread; otherwise the current treatment system will fall under the tremendous weight of ever-growing consequences. Things are fast approaching the tipping point.

The

Tipping Point

of grieving parents, and their guilt and shame only made matters worse.

Stories like this are all too common and, sadly, symbolic of the problem. These parents were trapped in the mindset that somehow their son’s addiction was their fault or that their son had a choice. They now share his “shame and blame.” They must have felt helpless while their son was still alive, unsure of how and where to reach out for assistance. Perhaps if they’d understood addiction for the disease that it is, things might have turned out differently. The responsibility to ensure that things do turn out differently lies squarely on the shoulders of those of us working in the field of addiction. One of the biggest hurdles to this is that, unlike with other chronic diseases, an addict

Addiction is a brain disorder, plain and simple; and its nothing to be ashamed of. I recently had a conversation with a yacht broker who was advertising a boat that just came onto the market. The owners were an older couple, and I innocently asked why they were selling. He told me their boat was named after their son who had recently died from a drug overdose. Their son’s death had caused the end of their marriage; they were selling their assets and splitting up, and could no longer bear the sight of the boat. I asked if I could meet with and talk to them, but my friend said the subject was taboo. The parents felt so much shame about how their son died that they told their friends he had died of heart failure. Nothing can heal the heart

or alcoholic typically doesn’t schedule an appointment with a doctor looking for a diagnosis of addiction while others, fearing they may have diseases such as diabetes or hypertension, will seek out help immediately. Additionally, our current treatment model fails to identify addiction in its earliest stages when it’s most easily treatable. Many primary care physicians and assistants are not trained to be proactive in questioning patients with early

signs of addiction. Further exacerbating the problem is the fact that many patients have the attitude that their drug and alcohol usage is no one else’s business.

Too many families have been destroyed and too many lives have been lost to this disease. The time for change is NOW. The US Surgeon General issued a report this past November entitled Facing Addiction in America, which emphasizes this critical point: Addiction is a brain disorder, plain and simple; and it’s nothing to be ashamed of. It took 100 years for women to get voting rights, 50 years for real changes in civil rights, but look at the LBGTQ community. It wasn’t long ago those in the LBGTQ community felt compelled to hide their sexual orientation, and yet together they affected change in what, 15 years? This community has shown that public opinion can be dramatically and quickly transformed. Societal change is needed to eliminate the stigma of addiction. Those of us working in the recovery industry need to stand up and make that change happen quickly. While there are approximately 23 million addicts in the US, only two million sought treatment last year. They deserve compassion, not judgment. After all, we don’t blame and shame people with other chronic diseases such as fibromyalgia or anxiety disorder. We need to ask ourselves what we can do to make a difference. If we can help eliminate the “blame and shame,” we will increase early detection and be better positioned to make an impact on the addict’s life when it’s most effective.

Jeffrey Fiorentino is a writer, teacher and speaker in the areas of business, technology, finance and legal issues facing entrepreneurs. He is the CEO of Kipu Systems and producer of the Kipu EMR, an electronic medical records system built specifically for addiction and behavioral health treatment. Mr. Fiorentino is chairman and CEO of In Recovery Magazine, and CEO of PingMD, an Android and IOS telehealth app. He has an MA in accounting from the Graduate School of Business at the University of Miami. Mr. Fiorentino previously worked in the business consulting arm of a top-five national accounting firm. KipuEMR.com

In Recovery Magazine

Spring 2017

In Recovery Magazine

From the Editor Janet A. Hopkins

No Pain, No Gain

or most of the year, we at In Recovery Magazine focus on recovery: the stories, the tips and the inspirations. This issue brings us behind the scenes of addiction treatment, where we witness the good, the bad and the ugly in this community. I began working in the treatment industry in 1981. There has been much change in the industry since then, but not to the magnitude I have seen in the past year. Some of these changes hit pretty hard; even our magazine suffered collateral damage. Some of you have not yet begun to pick up the pieces. There is a familiar saying: “No pain, no gain.” In my life, I have certainly found this to be true. A friend once told me during a trying time, “Your Higher Power takes away the best you have to give you something better.” I didn’t think that was possible, but today I know it’s true. I’m glad I was taught to put one foot in front of the other, especially during miserable times. Writers in this issue identify some of the troubling problems affecting the credibility of the nation’s treatment and support network. They also address the actions that will help providers create new solutions. Recently, the Surgeon General, Vivek H. Murthy, gave a stirring call to arms against our nation’s scourge of addiction. He notes in his report: “Insurance coverage for substance use disorder services is becoming more robust as a result of the . . . Mental Health Parity and Addiction Equity Act and the Affordable Care Act.” The report also recognizes the need to increase the capacity of the substance abuse workforce with professionals “with the skills to prevent, identify, and treat substance use disorders, providing ‘personalized care’ through integrated care delivery.” This sounds promising for the future of substance abuse treatment. In the cover story, John Lavitt (p. 14) invites us to take a look at the positive solutions enacted by Oklahoma’s governor, Mary Fallin. Michael DeLeon (p. 20) and Lilliam Rodriguez (p. 40) address their concerns with the industry grappling with the need for skilled professionals and more sophisticated standards of treatment. Attorney Mick Meagher (p. 26) calls for providers to take a stringent business inventory. Chris Budnick (p. 22) apologizes for his own mistakes while working in the field. Perhaps you have been distressed by the debate over drug legalization. Ed Gogek, MD, and mom, Jody Belsher (p. 46), speak to the cons, while Dustin John (p. 54) illustrates how punitive drug laws are destroying the lives of addicted individuals. In counterpoint, artist Manny Mendez (p. 76) and Columbia University researcher, David Norman (p. 18), tell their inspiring stories of redemption behind bars. Debra Selkirk (p. 48) lost her husband to liver disease. Her husband was refused a transplant because the “international standard” requires a minimum of six months of sobriety before a transplant will be authorized. This piece spoke to me on a very personal level, as my former husband also died for want of a transplant. Yet amidst the storms, we are taught that together we can change our lives, the lives of others, and the world we live in. Our 2016 Gratitude Gala (p. 68) made it clear that hope is alive and well, and good things are happening. Janet A. Hopkins Go forth and make a positive difference! Editor in Chief

New Year, Fresh Look, New Partners In Recovery Magazine warmly welcomes Jeffery Fiorentino and the management of KIPU as partners and shareholders. We trust that this collaboration will take our beloved, award-winning magazine to new heights. Stay tuned as we continue to serve the recovery community and seek new ways to extend the reach of our website and magazine.

editor@inrecoverymagazine.com

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In Recovery Magazine

Spring 2017

Let’s get back to a brighter future. We are RECO, one of South Florida’s most trusted addiction treatment providers. Since our founding, RECO Intensive Outpatient Program has been a leader in the addiction treatment field. At RECO, we believe that each individual is unique. Consequently, each treatment plan and metamorphosis in recovery must be unique, too. As we work to recreate joy and to instill patience, self-awareness, and responsibility in those who are suffering from addiction and co-occurring disorders, we understand and address the specific intricacies of each individual’s history.

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My name is Dean Taraborelli. I founded The Sanctuary at Sedona to be a place of healing and permanent life change. I want you to know that if you have a substance abuse problem or are stuck in the cycle of any self-destructive behavior, I understand. No matter how your loneliness and despair expresses itself, whether through a substance abuse problem, anxiety, depression, prescription drug dependence, eating disorders, or a multitude of other obsessive compulsive behaviors, they are all symptoms of the same underlying disconnection.

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Individualized Attention & Daily Private Therapy Private and SharedAccommodations Strong Clinical Component Integrated Holistic Approach Healing Core Issues Safe Nurturing Environment In Recovery Magazine

Spring 2017

ur non-12 step holistic addiction and trauma healing program is an approach based upon the knowledge that sustained recovery can only occur when a person’s physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual health are addressed. The body, mind, soul and spirit are connected and disease affecting one of these areas must affect all other parts of the person. We identify and heal the underlying causes of addiction, trauma and co-occuring disorders. Traditional treatment centers are often fragmented and focus predominately on the mind and peripherally the body. Our non-12 step holistic addiction treatment is designed to address the root cause of the addiction, support total healing, and restore balance to a person’s whole being. In our recovery program, traditional methods are combined with comprehensive and complementary treatment methods to fully address a person’s physical, mental, emotional, spiritual, and social issues.

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hat the experts say about “The Sanctuary at Sedona has created an environment where you can experience the type of deep emersion that can transform the brain...that allows for freedom from addictions to be possible.” Dr. Alberto Villoldo, New York Times bestselling author One Spirit Medicine: Ancient Ways to Ultimate Wellness

“One of the reasons The Sanctuary is a stand alone facility is it combines both conventional and unconventional methods to treat the person in mind, body and soul. Let’s face it, conventional methods in treatment programs around the world don’t really work that well.” Dr. Joe Dispenza, bestselling author of Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself and You are the Placebo Making Your Mind Matter

For more information:

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877.710.3385

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P.O. Box 11176, Prescott, AZ 86304 inrecoverymagazine.com CEO

Jeffrey Fiorentino

IN RE CO V E RY MAGA

Publisher

ZINE

Editor in Chief

Kim Welsh Janet A. Hopkins

FA L L 2015

Operations Manager Senior Copyeditor Copyeditors

Marketing Consultant Subscriptions Layout/Design A Call to Action

Valerie Lambert Barbara Schuderer Marieke Slovin Mary Locke Greg Remsen John Schuderer Kim Welsh John Shinholser

Authors’ Café

Catherine Townsend-Lyon

Book Review

Lena H.

Chaos and Clutter Free CrossTalk Everyday Miracle

Danielle Wurth Stephanie Moles Kiki Ryan

Meditation

Michael Lyding

Getting Down to Business

Carey Davidson

Recovery Today

Jenny Humes

Editor’s Note: I’m sure Joe C. (Winter 2016 – “Serving Underrepresented Populations”) wouldn’t mind being Kirk Bowden, NAADAC’s retiring president, but thanks to a sharp-eyed reader we were informed that we had included Kirk’s picture with Joe C.’s bio. Will the real Joe C. please stand up? Our apologies for the error.

In Recovery Magazine is published quarterly (4 times a year) by In Recovery Magazine, Inc., PO Box 11176, Prescott, Arizona 86304. Subscription rates (US dollars): 1 year $17.95, 2 years $25.95 in the United States and Possessions; 1 year $37.95, 2 years $65.95 in Canada and Mexico; all other countries $41.95 for 1 year, $73.95 for 2 years. Single copies (prepaid only): $8.99 in US, $11.99 in Canada and Mexico and $12.99 in all other countries. All rates include shipping and handling. Email your request to valerie@inrecoverymagazine.com. The magazine is published by founder, Kim Welsh, printed in the US by American Web and distributed by Disticor Magazine Distribution Services. ©2016 In Recovery Magazine, Inc. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including by photocopy, recording, or information storage and retrieval without permission in writing from the publisher. For uses beyond those listed above, please direct your written request to Permission Dept., email: editor@inrecoverymagazine.com. In Recovery Magazine does not verify any claims or other information appearing in any of the advertisements contained in the publication and cannot take responsibility for any losses or other damages incurred by readers in reliance of such content. Publication of any advertisement is not to be construed as an endorsement of the product or service offered.

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In Recovery Magazine (IRM) reserves the right to editorial control of all articles, stories and Letters to the Editor. IRM assumes no responsibility for errors within its publication. The opinions expressed are those of the authors and do not necessarily represent the policies of IRM and should not be construed as endorsements. Furthermore, IRM will not be responsible for any claims, losses or damages (whether direct or indirect) arising out of or relating to the use of or reliance on the contents of this magazine.

In Recovery Magazine

Spring 2017

Compass Recovery Center

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Get help for your gambling and other addiction problems! Compass Recovery Center offers gambling specific treatment for problem gamblers. We have designed and created a program specifically for the needs of problem gamblers which addresses not only the gambling addiction and underlying issues, but also the financial devastation that often accompanies the disease. We offer financial counseling after 30 days of treatment consisting of a weekly group and individual sessions as deemed necessary. Our goal is to provide the best possible drug and alcohol treatment for those who suffer from drug addiction and alcoholism while working together with sober living facilities to ensure a safe environment for our clients. Compass Recovery Centers Drug treatment program is clientcentered, meaning that our clients each have an individualized treatment plan to address their core issues. If you or a loved one struggles with chronic relapse, we have a program that fills the void between traditional primary care treatments and returning home. Our program is an excellent alternative to costly residential treatment. Our clients reap the benefits of receiving addiction treatment while having a structured, sober living support to learn how to live life on lifeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s terms and gain long-term sobriety. Our Intensive Outpatient Program (IOP) works well with our gender-specific, structured sober living in Prescott, Arizona.

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Contents

On the Cover

Features 18 | Finding Recovery in Race and Adversity by David Norman

My life was a perpetual attempt to escape a prevailing and overriding sense of alienation. As an inmate in an upstate New York prison, the reality of my blackness confronted me in the faces of my fellow prisoners.

20 | Our Biggest Fear by Michael DeLeon

We are facing one of the worst public health crises America has ever seen. Nearly 21 million Americans were directly affected by drug or alcohol addiction last year.

22 |

14 | Saving Lives:

Oklahoma Governor Mary Fallin Supports Recovery by John Lavitt From drug courts to treatment programs, Governor Mary Fallin is taking steps to address the drug crisis in her state.

A Formal Amends by Chris Budnick As an addiction professional, I was compelled to make amends and pledge to do better. While I have changed my attitudes and practices over the years, I have not spoken up to apologize, so here are my amends.

68 | IRM Third Annual Gratitude Gala by Janet A. Hopkins You never know who will show up at an IRM Gala!

Articles

Recovering Artists

64 | Gratitude is a Verb by Elizabeth Kipp 66 | The FaĂ§ade by Sarah Benton

73 | Toxic No More by Ginger Sacco 76 | Never Alone by Manny Mendez 79 | Once Fooled by Emily Capps

Legislature, Laws and Addiction 26 | A Fearless and Searching Business Inventory by M. David Meagher, Esq. 36 | A Changing Landscape

by Jimmy Rizzo

40 | Missing the Mark by Dr. Lilliam Rodriguez 42 | Facing Addiction by Michael King 44 |

Just Another Addictive Drug by Ed Gogek

46 | Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Not Just Pot Anymore by Jody Belsher 48 | The International Standard by Debra Selkirk 54 | Not a Perfect Fix by Dustin John 58 | Will Regulation Work? by Robert Apple 10

In Recovery Magazine

Spring 2017

Columns

13 | Meditation: Time to Start Living by Michael Lyding

In our Twelve Step program, we get to literally uproot ourselves, remove ourselves from infertile ground, and choose the best garden in which to grow.

24 | Everyday Miracle: Doing the Two-Step by Kiki Ryan This is my life. This is my truth. I choose this life, one day at a time.

28 | The BookStand Recovery is the subject of countless books. Here are some titles worth a look.

30 | Book Review: by Lena H. Beyond Belief: Agnostic Musings for 12 Step Life by Joe C.

32 |

A Call to Action by John Shinholser Thousands of people are directly affected by addiction every day. With your help, we can make a difference. We can reduce stigma and secrecy. We can effect political change. Together, we can succeed.

34 | Getting Down to Business: Buyer Beware! by Carey Davidson

Your family is in chaos. You know you desperately need help for yourself or someone you love who is struggling with addiction. You search the internet and are relieved to discover a vast array of programs and professionals who seem willing and able to help.

38| The Authors’ Café by Catherine Townsend-Lyon

Interviews with Robert Burney, Don St. John, Matthew Rupert and David E. McCauley

50 |

Chaos and Clutter Free by Danielle Wurth Everyday Organizing . . . challenges and the solutions that can resolve themselves.

62 | CrossTalk by Mollé

CrossTalk is based on the premise that recovery life is polytely: frequently, complex problem-solving situations characterized by the presence of not one, but several endings.

74 |

Feel Your Best by Laura O’Reilly Spring is a time of hope, change and new beginnings. It’s a time for letting go of the old while creating room for the new; an optimal time for cleansing, detoxification and trying new things.

80 |

Recovery Today by Jenny Humes Our favorite tips and humor for people traipsing the Road of Happy Destiny. (Cartoons by Ben Canha)

Spring 2017

In Recovery Magazine

Letters to the Editor

Chaos and Clutter Free

You Tell Us . . . Incredibly Grateful

I am incredibly grateful for your magazine and the support you have given me as I work toward my goal of becoming a professional motorcycle racer. Kim Welsh’s belief in me and willingness to provide sponsorship was the push I needed to begin chasing this childhood dream. The life I now have was inconceivable when I was in active addiction, but the stories and people in your magazine have proved to me how amazing life can be if you do the work and stay sober long enough for the “miracle to happen.” Once again, thank you so much! Taylor Lambert Austin, TX

Sober Guy

My article, “Sober Guy” (Winter 2016), came out great. I really appreciate you and your team’s effort in putting it together. I was impressed that you went the extra mile to get authorization to include the quotes from Danielle Steele about her son, Nick. It is a real honor to be featured in In Recovery Magazine and to contribute to the cause. I pray that my article, as well as the other great content in the magazine, will find those who need it most. Thanks again.

Have a comment? SEND YOUR THOUGHTS TO EDITOR@INRECOVERYMAGAZINE.COM

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Impressed

Wonderful and Informative

I just finished reading the Winter 2016 issue cover to cover. I couldn’t put it down. Of particular interest to me were the two articles about eating disorders and body issues, “More Than My Fair Share” and “The Ever-Changing Image.” I work in the treatment field and often find these are core issues that must be dealt with in sobriety and recovery, but they are often ignored. My other comment is that many readers are not recovery professionals, so the article called “Serving Underrepresented Populations” did not let your “civilian” readers know what NAADAC stands for. It might help others’ understanding if that were explained. Again, let me express my gratitude for such a wonderful and informative issue. Kay L. Prescott, AZ Editor’s Note: Thanks for the heads-up, Kay. NAADAC is the short name for the National Association of Alcohol and Drug Addiction Counselors. This organization is a wonderful resource for anyone working in the treatment field.

I am very, very impressed with your magazine. Congratulations. Good for you and all who work on it. Anne Harasik Springfield, MA

Inspired to Write

I first heard about you guys through the treatment center I attended. I was sitting at a coffee shop and found a copy of one of your issues. It inspired me to write something myself, and thought I’d shoot you an email on the possibility that I might be able to contribute to it. Sean Frehner Boynton Beach, FL

Editor’s Note: Thanks, Sean. We enjoy hearing how people find our magazine and are encouraged to write their own stories. You never know who might be inspired by your story to begin their own journey of recovery.

We welcome your comments. You may also contact us at In Recovery Magazine, PO Box 11176, Prescott, Arizona 86304. Submissions may be edited. We know our writers greatly appreciate your comments as much as we do.

Check out our digital app! In Recovery Magazine for iPhone, iPad or iPod touch and other mobile devices is here! Enjoy the stories you love in a convenient and readable way. The app is available for download from the App Store. Other mobile devices including Android, Kindle Fire, Windows 8, Facebook, Blackberry Playbook may download the In Recovery App at pocketmags.com. 12

In Recovery Magazine

Spring 2017

Meditation:

Time to Start Living (Title of an AA pamphlet)

by Mike Lyding

Alcohol solves some problems while it fosters others. Sometimes it does both. Sound confusing? It is. An example will clarify the point. Consider the choosing of a career or a life path.

lcohol solves some problems while it fosters others. Sometimes it does both. Sound confusing? It is. An example will clarify the point. Consider the choosing of a career or a life path. Insecurity made it difficult for me to believe I was entitled to do what I felt I was called to do. Fear made me not want to try to pursue an attractive path. After all, if I failed at getting what I really wanted, then where would I be? Better to try something else, something safer. Enter alcohol. It solved my problem, because with enough drinks, I didn’t care that I was settling for something less. Unfortunately, alcohol also fostered my problem as it worsened my selfconcept. AA has encouraged me to look into my own soul. One of the hardest doors to open was the one that held the key to what I really wanted to do with my life. Even though I put enough penetrating oil on that door’s hinges so I could open the door and reveal my true path, I was still not home free. My fears and insecurities had another powerful weapon in their arsenal. That weapon was the saying, “I’m too old to start over.” Can’t you just feel the power behind that despair? We must ask our Higher Power for help. That is the only option with enough power to overcome our fears. Happiness depends on aligning our feet with our souls, and we need our Higher Power to do so. It’s never too late. Only we can choose to turn “too late” into “never too late.”

Mike Lyding has been drawn to prayer and meditation since becoming sober in December 1993. At age 58, while meditating, he discovered he had a desire to write. So far, the result has been two daily meditation books written primarily for recovering communities: Grateful Not Smug (2006) and Gratitude a Verb (2009). mike.lyding@hotmail.com

Spring 2017

In Recovery Magazine

Cover Story

Saving Lives

Oklahoma Governor Mary Fallin Supports Recovery by John Lavitt

In Recovery Magazine

Spring 2017

hen you Google the phrase “women in recovery,” the number one offering is a recent Oklahoma state program, Women in Recovery (WIR), championed by Governor Mary Fallin. This program is one of several that illustrate Governor Fallin’s dedication to addressing the substance use disorder problems that plague her state. In addition to WIR, Fallin has shown her commitment to helping women by proactively supporting programs in Oklahoma such as ReMerge. Understanding that women are the bedrock of the family unit and seeing too many children thrown into the foster care system due to parents with substance use disorderrelated issues, Governor Fallin decided that enough was enough. Though a conservative Republican, she views the drug epidemic as a bipartisan issue. Ultimately, her number one goal in providing treatment and recovery services is to protect the health and wellbeing of Oklahoma citizens.

raise awareness about this problem and move forward. When people looked at Oklahoma, I didn’t want them to only see these addiction issues and prescription drug problems. I wanted them to see that there is a solution as well. Our programs have become models for other states across the nation.”

To address prescription drug abuse, Governor Fallin approved House Bill 1948, the first bill she signed into law in 2015. The bill was specifically written to reduce “doctor shopping,” the abusive practice of potential addicts seeking the same prescription drugs from more than one physician. The law also is designed to reduce reliance on, and inappropriate use of, prescription opioids. It requires doctors to check a Prescription Monitoring Program (PMP) database before writing prescriptions for potentially addictive drugs such as OxyContin, Vicodin, Percocet

“I believe positive steps are being taken by this movement and lives are being saved.” Speaking with In Recovery Magazine, Governor Fallin shared: “I have seen too many of my friends and their families affected by this drug epidemic. Too many have lost loved ones and too many young lives have been derailed. Today, I am happy to see a bipartisan movement across this country to address this problem. I believe positive steps are being taken by this movement and lives are being saved.”

Given Oklahoma’s bleak drug abuse statistics, a movement was desperately needed. From 2007 to 2013, three out of four unintentional poisoning deaths in the state were due to prescription drug overdoses. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), Oklahoma ranked number one in 2012 in the number of painkiller prescriptions per 100 people. Despite Oklahoma’s continued high rank in a 2016 CDC prescription drug infographic (number five out of 50 states), the state has shown improvement over the past few years, which is a clear testament to the difference Governor Fallin’s programs have made. When asked her perspective on the positive shift, Governor Fallin said, “I do know that treatment and recovery services are important because they work in practice. We want to encourage people with addiction issues to get the help they need. The role I knew the state could effectively play was through educational programs and prevention efforts. By getting out the message that addiction threatens everyone, we could Spring 2017

and other opioids. By checking the database when they prescribe a controlled substance, doctors can reduce the likelihood of patients abusing the system. WIR was one of the first recovery programs of its kind in the nation. Launched before Governor Fallin took office, WIR is an evidence-based alternative to incarceration for women facing significant prison sentences in Tulsa County for non-violent, drug-related offenses. The vast majority of women in this program have a history of alcohol abuse and addiction issues while also being mothers. Their families have been torn apart by the disease of addiction. Since taking office, Governor Fallin has made a concerted effort to support this innovative program. An intensive outpatient alternative for eligible women, WIR is operated in partnership with the George Kaiser Family Foundation. By working in conjunction with the criminal justice system, WIR helps to ensure that program participants receive substance abuse and mental health treatment, educational options and workforce readiness training, as well as family reunification services. WIR helps women caught in dire straits to face their addiction issues and recover from the trauma that often lurks behind the veil of addiction. This program takes women beyond the storm of their current life crisis and into the sunlight of positive mobility. It helps them acquire the essential economic, emotional and social tools they need to build successful lives. Governor Fallin believes treatment programs like WIR will help individuals caught in the criminal justice system’s generational vise to evolve into productive, taxpaying citizens. As a fiscal conservative, she appreciates that such evidence-based programs have proven to be more cost-

In Recovery Magazine

effective than incarceration while also improving public safety. When she came into office, the governor was troubled by the disturbing fact that Oklahoma was ranked number one for female incarceration per capita in the United States. Nearly 80% of Oklahomaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s incarcerated women were nonviolent offenders, and the majority of them were in Oklahoma Correctional Facilities because of drug abuse issues. When combining these statistics with the grim reality that children with an incarcerated mother are five times more likely to end up in prison themselves, she knew the problem in Oklahoma was serious. The traditional 30-day addiction rehab model has been shown time and again to be ineffective because it frequently does not address the history of trauma that often lurks behind addiction issues. Aware of this connection, Governor Fallin has spoken positively about programs that offer extended treatment where trauma can be addressed. ReMerge is one such program. It focuses on providing extended treatment while addressing trauma. Fallin has made a definitive effort to get nonviolent offenders out of

the criminal ensnarement of the 21st century prison system, and into treatment programs through the institution of drug courts. During her administration, Governor Fallin has supported the establishment of additional treatment and diversion programs like ReMerge, explaining how they can effectively respond to the drug addiction issues in Oklahoma: â&#x20AC;&#x153;ReMerge is a comprehensive female diversion program designed to transform women and mothers facing incarceration into productive citizens. It has also been applied to people that have addiction issues, and they are given a choice by a judge or a district attorney: they can either go to prison or they can go into this treatment program that also helps them get an education. We also provide them access to an extended treatment program that gives them much better success at achieving longterm recovery. We offer counseling services to help put their families back together. We teach them how to get ready for work, how to show up on time, how to write a resumĂŠ, do

In Recovery Magazine

Spring 2017

a job interview and other needed skills. It’s a comprehensive system that we have used when it comes to treatment and recovery services. It’s a form of community sentencing that is designed to work.”

The governor’s Justice Reinvestment Initiative provides a viable alternative for nonviolent offenders. She emphasized this issue in her 2015 State of the State address: “Oklahoma must ramp up its ‘smart on crime’ policies, including the Justice Reinvestment Initiative, designed to intervene for low-risk, nonviolent offenders and more readily offer alternatives such as drug, veterans’ and mental health courts.” When asked about the importance of recovery initiatives, she thoughtfully replied, “The scourge of drugs in our nation is truly a plague. It goes so far beyond substance abuse issues just being trendy or sexy. We have to keep pounding the public education message that help is available. It can be very dangerous if you even experiment with substances, and currently there’s a low rate of recovery for addicts. We want to save lives.”

From drug courts to treatment programs, Governor Mary Fallin taking steps to address the drug crisis in her state. While passionate about law enforcement, she is even more fervent about protecting the health and welfare of her constituents. This is what makes her special.

Spring 2017

In Recovery Magazine

John Lavitt, growing up in New York City as a stutterer, embraced writing as a way to express himself when the words would not come. After graduating from Brown University, he lived on the Greek island of Patmos, studying with his mentor, the American poet Robert Lax (1913-2000). John’s published work includes three articles in Chicken Soup for the Soul and poems in poetry journals and compilations. Active in recovery, John presently works as the Treatment Professional News Editor for The Fix.

Finding Recovery in Race and Adversity by David Norman

ine was a life of dissoluteness and depravity, addiction and despair, and a perpetual attempt to escape a prevailing and overriding sense of alienation. As an inmate in an upstate New York prison, the reality of my blackness confronted me in the faces of my fellow prisoners. I was literally face-to-face with my blackness, and that blackness constituted the overwhelming majority of faces in the New York penal system. This was not my first time in a New York state correctional institution; however, this time was different. When I first went to prison 28 years earlier, I was 18 years old. That first incarceration had felt like an adventure, a coming of age trial that every drug-dealing young Harlemite was destined to endure. Now I was 46, and the atmosphere was different. The prison demographic had changed. There seemed to be an increase in Black and Hispanic faces. Even more than that, there was a pervasive climate of despair and hopelessness among the inmates. I was deeply disturbed by the hopelessness I witnessed in the faces of the other inmates. I imagined that most of them came from a similar background to mine. After all, 85% of inmates in the New York state penitentiary system come from the five boroughs of New York City and its surrounding environs. I started drinking around the age of ten. By my early teens, I was addicted to heroin, and selling drugs to support my habit. I supposed that most of these young inmates had followed a path resembling mine. I had never questioned my environment or my behavior. It seemed to be the course most of my friends, neighbors and I were destined to take, and we accepted our fates without question or resistance. There were no doctors, lawyers or architects in my community. There were only the poor. Of the poverty-stricken, there were those who were hard working, but who never advanced economically. These were people who barely managed to pay their bills and raise their children. They were engaged in a struggle for economic security that never relented nor gave them any hint that it would someday end in a victory.

Despite the fact that most of these hardworking people never committed crimes or spent time in prison, they shared the same alienation and despair with those inmates who were even less fortunate. They all wore the same masks of hopelessness although they were supposedly free. There was no way out and no hope for a different future. To me, all of this work seemed too great an effort for such a small return. I took my cues from another group of people, those with less fortitude but with more savvy and ingenuity: the street hustlers of Harlem. In all areas, these people seemed to rise above the wretched masses of hard workers. Street people valued conspicuous consumption. The cars they drove were flashy; the clothes they wore were ostentatious; everything they did was a performance. They had style, something that was especially alluring to a teenager growing up in the 1960s. This allure was what caught my unschooled eye. Most importantly, street hustlers had money. They were successful, or at least they appeared to be so, and they dispensed advice on Harlem street corners. People came to listen because, after all, the hustlers seemed successful. In these lessons, they readily offered their wisdom to the young and impressionable, and it was from them that I discovered the meaning of life. It was as though they had a hard copy manual on what course of action to take in every situation. What was the message? It was simple. Put yourself first in everything. Forget altruism, compassion and morality. This was survival; it was you against the world. Your only friends were those who practiced the same type of immoral behavior. You did not tell on them and they did not tell on you. Everyone existed in the cocoon provided by the criminal subculture, and it was from this cocoon that you found sustenance. The cocoon protected you from the stupidity of the masses, including your own family. While these ideas may seem ridiculous to me now, they were irresistible to the younger version of myself, a giddyeyed, unsure youth, struggling to find himself and his early manhood. The dichotomy between the world of the never-advancing

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American inmates. As I began to see my face in theirs, I started to recognize the same despair and alienation. The “I” started to shrink, to lessen in importance, and the “We” began to increase. My focus turned outward and released me from the pain that accompanied my self-doubt and self-flagellation. I began to realize that I had been clutching desperately to a false philosophy of life. It had never been me against the world; it was only me against my counterproductive thoughts and myself. Even with this realization, I was not sure how to proceed. I found the answer in prison work. Sometime after the Attica rebellion, New York state prisons introduced transitional service programs to their populations. Phase One of the program was designed to facilitate an inmate’s transition to prison. Phase Two sought to ease the stress of reentering society. I was able to take the focus off myself and to immerse myself in the selfless act of improving the lives of others. My alienation was replaced with a sense of purpose and meaning. My spirituality was enhanced by my connection to the larger inmate population. I served both black and white inmates; and as a result, I served myself.

hard worker and the self-centered criminal was a false one. We existed along a continuum with many points of reality in between. There was no benefit to occupying one end of the spectrum. This was what I discovered when I was again incarcerated in January of 1995.

This experience changed my entire outlook on life. I began learning the meaning of going beyond the limited confines of my personal self and the importance of connecting to the larger unity of the collective self. I alone was accountable for my attitude; I alone was in control of my mind and behavior. Most importantly, I was not only responsible for myself, but also to humankind.

I began to realize that my addiction dictated my thinking and behavior. It was a culture that consumed me. What had always been important was the “I,” and thus my focus had been on that “I.” When I subjected myself to the microscopic focus of self examination, I found myself always wanting. I was always comparing myself to the next street hustler, and I always came up lacking. No matter how good I was, someone else was always better. I slowly began to realize that the “I” was not as important as I had thought.

After six years of this work, I was paroled. My work continues through my mentoring and other activities, and I have 21 years clean and sober.

I found a mirror in the faces of my fellow African-

David Norman is a graduate of Columbia University with a BA in philosophy. He works at Columbia University’s Mailman School of Public Health as a researcher on a longitudinal study project for HIV positive adults in upstate New York and New York City. In 2011, David was awarded a Philosophy in an Exclusive Key Fellowship to study philosophy at Penn State. David is a proud 2016-2017 recipient of a Beyond the Bars Fellowship from the Center for Justice at the Columbia University School of Social Work, where he is researching issues of mass incarceration. dn2146@columbia.edu

Spring 2017

In Recovery Magazine

OUR BIGGEST

FEAR by Michael DeLeon

“You must be the change you wish to see in the world.”

e are facing one of the worst public health crises America has ever seen. We are losing more people to drug overdoses than at any other time in our history. According to US Surgeon General Vivek Murthy, nearly 21 million Americans were directly affected by drug or alcohol addiction last year, a number similar to those suffering from diabetes. This is a huge social and medical problem; there is hardly anyone in America who is not directly or indirectly affected, and the problem continues to worsen. Our opiate and heroin pandemic is escalating in an out-of-control synthetic storm. Prescription medication sales are on the rise. At this rate, the problem will only get worse in the years to come. The need for addiction treatment is greater than ever before. Thanks to the Mental Health Parity and Addiction Equity Act passed by Congress, mental health and substance use disorders (SUDs) must be treated like any other medical condition. When working with people seeking treatment for SUDs and families doing the same with unmotivated family members, I have found it tremendously difficult to find long-term treatment for people struggling with addiction. It has become even more difficult to find sufficient recovery support services for those completing primary treatment. Such services hardly exist across America; they’re not supported. Incredible though it may seem, the US lacks a uniform system of care for addiction. We lack a long-term approach to treating an illness that people commonly accept as a lifelong condition. Treatment is needed more than ever, but is even more difficult for the industry to provide.

Present-day substance abuse treatment is both reviled and required for solutions. From my view over the past five years of finding and securing treatment for thousands of people, the treatment industry is rarely loved and often hated. However, this is a commodity many people are frantically searching for: “More beds! We need more beds! We need more long-term treatment beds with a continuum of care and recovery support services.” In my opinion, the addiction pandemic will worsen over the next few years as more prescription medications are dumped on society, the synthetic opioids plague America with poisons made in China and in clandestine labs run by criminal syndicates, and catastrophic consequences begin to unfold from the legalization of commercialized and industrialized THC poisons mass-marketed as marijuana. All the while, it gets more difficult to treat a burgeoning population in need of therapy and counseling. I believe the biggest fear the treatment industry has at this point is failure – failure to have the ability to treat clients because of roadblocks set up by the insurance industry. Addiction should be treated as the disease it is, but there is not yet a standardized system of care. The industry charged with treatment is hindered by the very industry charged with funding it: the insurance industry. Reimbursements to treatment centers are decreasing while the need for more extensive treatment increases. Treatment centers across the country are closing down as insurance companies that have approved services are denying payments. How does an insurance company approve a service and a treatment, then months later, deny

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the payment for that service? It’s immoral and unethical. It should be illegal. This is what the treatment industry fears most – being unable to save lives due to insufficient funding to operate. Treating the disease of addiction means supporting the continued recovery from that disease. As with diabetes, relapse from the disease of addiction is typical. Many people return to treatment over and over again. Treatment stints are getting shorter because insurance companies are approving shorter and shorter stays. If relapse occurs, clients are receiving less time in treatment when common sense and all evidence demonstrates that long-term support provides better outcomes. Why are we providing less support to an industry that needs to provide more services? Compounding this situation is the realization that as current treatment standards are further developed, they will require additional medical education and licensing, thus adding more cost to treatment. If addiction becomes defined as a spectrum disorder (a group of developmental disorders), current one-size-fits-all programs will not be considered effective interventions. Mental health and substance abuse treatment as we know it today will need to change.

when treating different addictions and outcome data must be collected. We are now finding that most cases of addiction are accompanied by a personal history of trauma or untreated mental health disorders. This complexity calls for licensed professionals and a multifaceted standard of treatment. If these acute medical conditions are not treated medically, the patient fails; the system fails, we all fail. If the treatment industry is hindered from providing these services because the insurance industry is more focused on shareholder profit than on providing funding for appropriate treatment services, we will continue to be unable to solve the addiction pandemic. We must not allow the insurance industry to hinder medical treatment of a disease that is absolutely treatable. Treatment works, and your support matters. Stay informed. Get involved. Learn how to get in touch and stay in touch with your federal, state and local elected leaders. Write to you state’s insurance commissioner. Details about personal and local impact are very effective in getting our message across.

For far too long, the treatment industry has been trying to fit square pegs into round holes. Evidence-based science indicates that there is no universal treatment method for all. Just as ovarian cancer is not treated with the same chemotherapy as prostate cancer, the opioid-addicted brain should not be treated the same as an alcoholaddicted brain. Individualized treatment must be applied Spring 2017

In Recovery Magazine

Michael DeLeon, director and producer of the films Kids Are Dying, An American Epidemic and MarijuanaX, is currently producing three documentaries, Higher Power, Recovery – The Upside of Down and A Family Affair. Michael is the founder of Steered Straight, Inc., a motivational outreach program for youth and young adults, reaching over two million students nationwide and expanding across 45 states. www.steeredstraight.org

Everyday Miracle

A Formal Amends

by Chris Budnick

y name is Chris Budnick and I am a licensed clinical addiction specialist. I began working in the addiction treatment and recovery field in 1993.

There are many people involved in the broad issue of substance use disorders and recovery: employers, first responders, the criminal justice system, policymakers, politicians, companies, advertisers, treatment providers, addiction professionals, the recovery community, families, not to mention the individual with the substance use disorder. Of all these people, it is the individuals with substance use disorders who face the greatest scrutiny, stigma, discrimination and blame. For too long, they have stood alone bearing the full brunt of the responsibility while systems of care and policies impacting housing, education and employment have largely conspired to undermine any chance of a sustained recovery. Last week, I found myself approaching a police department to apologize for failing them. When they had reached out in the middle of the night seeking services for a young woman, we told them “No, we can’t help her tonight.” She was killed within hours of this decision, leaving behind a two-year-old daughter. I pledged to the officer that we would do better. This experience nudged me to put to paper some ideas I have articulated and others I have only contemplated. As an addiction professional, I was compelled to make amends and pledge to do better. While I have changed my attitudes and practices over the years, I have not spoken up to apologize, so here are my amends: I am sorry for the barriers you confront when you attempt to access help.

I am sorry for my arrogance when I assumed I was an expert about your life.

I am sorry for the contradictory “sobriety” and “active use” requirements you encounter.

I apologize for privately finding satisfaction in your failure because it reinforced the fallacy that I know best and if you’d just do as I say, you’d recover.

I apologize for the harm that has come to you, your family, your unborn children and your community because you have not been provided services on demand. I apologize for expecting you to provide all the motivation to initiate recovery while I assumed no responsibility for enhancing your readiness for recovery. I am sorry for creating unrealistic expectations of you. I apologize for provider success statistics which misled you and your family. I am sorry for discharging you from treatment for becoming symptomatic. I’m even sorrier, though, for abandoning you at your time of greatest vulnerability and for this failure contributing to the heartbreak of your loved ones. I am sorry for abandoning you when you left treatment, either successfully or unsuccessfully. I am sorry for the irritation in my voice when you returned following a setback because you didn’t do everything I told you to do. 22

I am sorry for not enthusiastically celebrating your successes when you achieved them through a different pathway or style than mine. I apologize for being a silent co-conspirator for the stigma that has resulted in systems of punishment and discriminatory policies and practices. I am sorry for turning you away from treatment because you have “been here too many times.” I am sorry for not referring you to alternatives services when you did not respond to the services I’ve offered. I am sorry for allowing you to take the blame when treatment did not work, instead of defending you because you received an inadequate dose and duration of care. I am sorry for reaping the benefits of recovery while failing to do everything I can to ensure those benefits are available to anyone, regardless of privilege, socioeconomic status, education, employability and criminal history.

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Spring 2017

I apologize for being an addiction professional who did not provide you with the recovery supports you needed to sustain recovery. More importantly, I apologize for conspiring through silence and inaction with a system that ill prepares you for success. I am sorry for not calling to check on you when you didn’t show up for treatment. I’m sorry for not calling to support you after you left treatment. I apologize for allowing society to maintain the belief that you “chose” to use again. I am sorry for not fighting harder for adequate treatment and recovery support services. All persons with substance use disorders should be entitled to a minimum of five years of monitoring and recovery support. I am sorry for not advocating for safe and supportive housing and non-exploitive employment. I am sorry for being so self-centered that I only thought about you in the context of

treatment, while failing to fully understand the environmental and social realities of your life and how they impacted your ability to initiate and sustain recovery. I apologize to your loved ones who were robbed of the chance to have a healthy family member. I am deeply sorry that your community was robbed of the gifts your recovery could have brought them. I’m sorry that during drug epidemics, systems of control and punishment have been the response to communities of color. I am sorry that, with my silence and inaction, I contributed to the belief that persons with substance use disorders are criminals and should be punished. I am sorry for not speaking out as a recovery ally to families, friends, neighbors, colleagues, policymakers and public officials about why I support recovery. I am sorry for all the things I have left off this list because I failed to regularly solicit your feedback about the effectiveness of my support for you in your recovery.

My sorrow is the foundation of my commitment to improve the accessibility, affordability and quality of addiction treatment and recovery support services, and to create the community space in which long-term personal and family recovery can flourish. y Chris Budnick, MSW, LCSW, LCAS, CCS, has been in recovery since 1990 and has worked in the addiction and recovery field since 1993. Since 2002, Chris has served as an adjunct instructor with the North Carolina (NC) State University. He is the Executive Director for Healing Transitions and the founding board chairperson for Recovery Communities of North Carolina, Inc. He also serves on the NC Lawyer Assistance Program Board, the Recovery Africa Board and the City of Raleigh Substance Abuse Commission. His most rewarding work has been collaborative research, publication and presentation with Boyd Pickard and William White of the history of mutual aid recovery fellowships. ckbudnick@gmail.com

Spring 2017

In Recovery Magazine

Everyday Miracles

Doing the Two-Step by Kiki Ryan

was really good at early sobriety, having repeated it at least 50 to 100 times. But who’s counting? The thing is, it’s not something you’re supposed to get good at. Early sobriety is something you suffer through and possibly repeat a few times before you move on with recovery and life. Plenty of alcoholics and drugs addicts relate to doing the early recovery two-step long after the record stops playing. Fortunately, I eventually took off my dancing shoes and sobered up.

I had no intention of moving beyond early sobriety. I had no intention of stopping drinking. Ever.

By the time I began drinking alcoholically, I was a wife and mother with the reputation of being hyper-responsible. I was a loyal, dependable friend. I lived a seemingly “normal” life, except for the fact that I was a fearful, anxious mess. My outsides did not match my insides, and my screwed-up insides were always in control.

My true journey of recovery began on an ordinary day. I was sitting on an icy folding chair in a church basement, my entire body shaking, not from cold but from an overwhelming desire to steal five dollars from the collection basket heading my way and then sneak out of the meeting, purchase a bottle of vodka, then return and drink it in the bathroom before the closing prayer.

Eleven stints in rehab made it clear that I was an alcoholic. At the age of 16, after having my first drinks at a party (three drinks gulped down in about as many minutes), I went into the restroom, looked in the mirror and thought, you are not good at this. Then, I returned to the party and drank until I blacked out.

As I planned my escape, I glanced up and saw a classy but disheveled man whose place in the hierarchy of social structure was hard to pin down. From his first sentence, I knew without a doubt that I wanted what he had and that he could show me how to get it.

As I went from teen mother to struggling single parent to financially secure professional and wife, my drinking incidents were spaced far enough apart that they failed to raise alarms. When I got married at 24, it was time for me to exhale. The years of juggling work, parenting, college and a social life were over because I had a partner. Life was settled and peaceful, but not for long.

Hearing that he had been exactly where I was now but wasn’t anymore, I realized I had been lying to myself. I did want a life free from drunkenness and the accompanying insanity. I did want to stop drinking.

One evening I came home wound more tightly than usual, poured myself a glass of wine, nestled into the couch, took the first sip, and the happiest feeling washed over me. It was an alcohol-induced orgasm that instantly took away my fear, anxiety, insecurity and longing to be something other than what I was. From then on, I could not get enough. Life took on a frightening pattern. I’d get drunk, bad things would happen, my family and daughter would be devastated, and I’d be sent off with the hopes that I would find the solution to my problems. My family wanted someone to cure me, and all I wanted was to go to rehab, get the heat off, get back home and get drunk.

My drinking was killing me and hurting everyone I loved, but I loved vodka most and could not imagine a life without it. I suffered indignities and consequences that should have made me want to stop. Hurting the child I loved, who came in a not-soclose second to vodka, should have made me stop. It didn’t.

I sat there, an hour post-release from a mental ward and with a limited attention span, listening as best I could. I heard snippets of my story in his: the dysfunctional family, the revolving institution doors, consistently falling short of my potential, my self-loathing and awareness that although it was destructive and hurtful, I couldn’t stop. I introduced myself to Bob after the meeting. Talking with him in the parking lot until my husband picked me up, I learned that being as delusional and manipulative as he had been, I would require a complete psychic change to get sober. I humbly climbed into my husband’s car after setting a time with Bob to pick me up in the morning. I knew I’d be okay. I couldn’t explain it, but I knew it. Bob picked me up the next morning, and the 90 mornings that

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followed. He shared his experience while driving me to meetings, sometimes three a day. He introduced me to solid sober people; found newcomers for me to help; reminded me that I wasn’t special, and called me on my BS; and spent hours on the phone with me, talking about whatever would keep my mind and body from turning to drinking. During those months, I learned from Bob and the many other sober alcoholics I met in the meetings – including a closeknit group of women with whom I spent regular, necessary time – that sobriety, especially early sobriety, was about service and letting go of self-centered behaviors. So I made coffee at meetings and listened rather than talked. I stuck with winners – the sober, productive, doing-their-best-and- drinking thinking because I had so much to do. making-amends-as-needed winners. By listening to that first person who gave me hope, and every It was about getting well, but it also was about making amends to person thereafter, I was able to follow a program of recovery. my daughter and my family by being there for them. There was Before I knew it, the days turned to months and years. With no big declaration that I was cured because they had heard that each passing anniversary, this year marking my 16th, I feel such before. Rather, it was me doing what I should have done all along. gratitude for sobriety that I want to shout it from the rooftop. Now when I made my daughter brownies it was no longer to manipulate her into forgiving a drinking episode, it was to do something kind for her. I was present and took care of things I had neglected. I gave rather than took, and I slowly regained respect, trust and love. Each addict and alcoholic is unique, yet there are actions and experiences common to those who achieve success. One of the most important things for me, and for thousands of other recovering alcoholics, was having a daily routine. Early on the days felt endless, but as I filled them with things to do and ways to give, they became manageable. I quit being bored and quit my

Spring 2017

Recovery isn’t easy, but if you do what a sober person does, it is likely that you will have what a sober person has. Today I work a program that includes meetings, working with newcomers, rigorous honesty, righting wrongs and being the best person I can be. I never again want to do the recovery-relapse two-step; I’m happier doing the sober, gratitude dance of living.

In Recovery Magazine

Kiki Ryan is a Los Angeles-based healthcare project manager who previously worked as a healthcare lobbyist and public health advocate in New York. She volunteers with agencies supporting the homeless and those protecting LA’s beaches. All possible because she is a grateful, recovering alcoholic with 16 years sober.

Searching and Fearless

Can the Addiction Treatment Industry Withstand a Review of Its Business Practices? by M. David (Mick) Meagher, Esq.

frequently hear that medical professionals do not take the addiction treatment industry seriously. With the sometimes outrageous and, sadly, common acts of misconduct, it is no wonder we are treated with disrespect. Professional treatment providers must be encouraged to carefully scrutinize their business model practices and make the necessary changes. Whether a center is based in the Twelve Step model or promotes itself as a non-Twelve Step program, there should be consistent components for care. In self-help programs, this is called an inventory. Other programs utilize Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), which encourages changing maladaptive thinking. Regardless of philosophy, most program models encourage clients to examine their behavior in order to develop a healthier, integrated life. Since we ask this of our clients, it seems appropriate to ask treatment providers to do the same. Ethical misbehavior has come to the forefront of public attention. The most unfortunate behaviors get the most media, perhaps with good reason. Recent FBI raids were conducted to examine urinalysis billing practices and other forms of insurance fraud. There were investigations of licensed centers paying for referrals. A number of centers seem to avoid licensing by operating sober living homes (SLH) and then referring clients to their own 26

outpatient programs. Electronic insurance billing has unleashed the prospect of a federal wire-fraud prosecution. Excessive Drug Testing. Insurance companies are becoming more proactive in their investigations and lawsuits. CIGNA sued Sky Toxicology for $20 million. Sky settled the case. The company has also been at the forefront of a patient-brokering scheme that induced treatment centers into buying “memberships” in limited liability partnerships (LLP) set up by Sky’s drug testing laboratories. There is now a second, more significant suit against Sky filed by United Healthcare which includes several labs, treatment centers and individuals named as defendants. It is alleged that these arrangements returned large sums of money to investors. In some instances, the amounts returned would make Bernie Madoff look like a rank amateur in the world of financial schemes. United’s suit alleges that various laboratories, treatment centers, individuals and SHLs defrauded the insurance company by excessive billing for unnecessarily frequent and inappropriate types of urinalyses, and/or by paying or being paid kickbacks for referring these tests to the labs. In the lawsuit, United claims they were defrauded of more than $50,000,000. United is seeking

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triple damages, punitive damages, attorney fees and injunctions. A judgment could run into hundreds of millions of dollars. The scheme is simple. A treatment provider invests in a membership in the LLP. The investor then refers their clients’ urine samples to the lab for analysis. The lawsuit alleges Elements Behavioral Health, Inc. (owners of Promises in the Los Angeles area), bought an investment for $30 thousand and referred their tests to Sky Toxicology. In return, they received $600 thousand per month. The suit also alleges that Solid Landings of Costa Mesa, California, forged doctors’ signatures on a medical

Many treatment providers incorrectly assume they are not at risk if they do not accept reimbursement from federallyfunded insurance plans such as Medicare or Medicaid. However, a number of states, including California and Florida, have significant statutes that prohibit these models of practice. In California, Health Net Insurance has begun a statewide comprehensive audit of those treatment centers in their network. This audit is to identify centers that have up-charged Health Net, waived copays and deductibles, offered “free housing” in an SLH while the client is in an outpatient program, bought the insurance

“. . . the amounts returned would make Bernie Madoff look like a rank amateur in the world of financial schemes”. referral for urinalyses, naming the facility and two of its owners as defendants. The owner and operator of another California program, Above It All, is also named in the suit. A significant red flag is the fact that if an investor, whether a treatment corporation or an owner, did not refer a sufficient number of specimens for testing, the lab would remove the investor from the partnership. Partnerships could not be purchased without a flow of referrals. United claims the participants committed fraud, deception, unfair business practices, negligent misrepresentations, interference with the contract between United and those it insures, as well as unjust enrichment. The fraud comes in the form of excessive billing, lab tests that are not medically necessary, and violations of the various state laws that prohibit self-referrals and kickbacks for referrals. In New Jersey, Blue Cross Blue Shield sued American Addiction Centers (AAC) for alleged fraudulent drug testing. The suit claims that AAC performed urine drug tests 6-12 times more frequently than medically necessary. Other suits for excessive billing for drug testing have been filed in Florida. Raids were conducted on Good Decisions Sober Living, an SLH with an outpatient program that billed insurance about $1,500 per drug test and tested each resident four times a week. The organization operated its own testing lab and medical billing company. They went so far as to advertise free rent, gym memberships and transportation to would-be residents. The essence of this type of fraud is simple. The center or provider conducts an onsite drug test – often at a cost of no more than three dollars. The test is then sent to a laboratory for review and the insurance company is billed for the test. These tests are used to justify a second test for “verification” of the result. Verification tests are typically not medically justifiable, but nonetheless are billed in amounts as high as $2,000.

plan for the client and/or paid a referral fee. Payment for Referrals of Clients. It is common for independent intervention and marketing professionals to be paid by several treatment centers at once. This relationship is most likely not a violation of ethics or law. However, if the payment is adjusted upward or downward based upon the number of referrals to a program, it becomes patient brokering, which is considered illegal in most states. Paying a fee for each telephone referral is another example of patient brokering. Often, the payment-per-referral scheme is described as a “marketing fee.” In states that have outlawed patient brokering, simply describing the payment as a marketing fee will not pass the sniff test. Blocking Clients from Leaving. A recent trend is using aggressive tactics to block clients from leaving treatment before the center believes the client is ready. Serious legal risks for these tactics could include refusing to return personal property such as wallets, keys, etc., to the owner and refusing to refund the unused portion of fees paid in advance. Offering Services Beyond the Scope of License or Expertise. Many clients in need of medically-managed detoxification are placed at risk by being taken into a house-based facility (SLH). “Assessments” are often nothing more than questions asked by a non-medical staff member who lacks the necessary training to medically assess withdrawal complication risks. Final Thoughts. First, there may be safe harbors that make some transactions legal; and second, lawyers who are not licensed in your state, and who are not healthcare experts, are not reliable sources for legal analysis or opinions.

It is my hope that professional treatment providers will examine their business practices to ensure they are both legally and ethically sound.

The key areas of examination in fraud claims are the medical necessity and costs associated with these tests. The question asked is, “If the client lacks the ability to maintain abstinence as shown by twice daily drug testing, why isn’t that client in a residential treatment center?” Fraud is charged if the treatment center or one of its owners has a personal or family interest in the testing laboratory. Spring 2017

In Recovery Magazine

Mick Meagher is a California attorney. His practice consists of restructuring treatment centers, risk assessment and reduction for healthcare professionals and organizations, and First Amendment and business litigation. He holds a business degree and spent over 17 years in chemical dependency treatment, intervention training, treatment facility management and full-time consulting. After twelve years of experience and over 2,200 interventions, Mick wrote Beginning of a Miracle: How to Intervene with the Addicted or Alcoholic Person. mickmeagher@mdmeagher.com

The BookStand Recovery is the subject of countless books, blogs, films, CDs and apps. Below are some titles worth a look. If you would like us to include your books, blogs, films, CDs or apps in this column, please contact editor@inrecoverymagazine.com.

Understanding the High-Functioning Alcoholic: Breaking the Cycle and Finding Hope (Sarah Allen

Benton, Rowman & Littlefield, 2010). Through research, interviews and her own personal experiences, the author examines traits unique to highfunctioning alcoholics (HFAs). In addition to describing characteristics and behavior patterns, she recounts the experiences of HFAs in high school, college, graduate school and as professionals. She explores recovery and the obstacles HFAs face when getting treatment, as well as the actions necessary for them to get sober, maintain long-term sobriety, and find peace and spirituality in their lives.

When Your Partner Has an Addiction

(Christopher Kennedy Lawford and Beverly Engel, BenBella Books, 2016). New York Times bestselling author and addiction expert Lawford and psychotherapist Engel offer advice on the topic of codependency between addicted people and their partners, and how to overcome it. They challenge the notion that the best chance for recovery – for the addict and their partner – is to walk away. Instead, they make the revolutionary claim that you and the love you have for your partner can be a key part of their journey to recovery. Available on Amazon

www.highfunctioningalcoholic.com

Healing the Wounds of Childhood

(Don St. John, Amazon Digital Services, LLC, 2015). This book is an inspiring story of the author’s ability to transcend a traumatic childhood and an exploration of the relationship among body, mind, stress, health, love and relationship. A mustread for anyone on the road to recovery. Available on Amazon.

Versions of the Self (Christy Birmingham, Createspace, 2015). Imagine a shift in the way you see the world that arises through poetic narration. Imagine the world as a collection of selves. These selves collide, disperse, intermingle and share themselves in lines of free verse in the author’s second poetry collection. These 80 unique poems definitely color themselves outside of the lines. https://www.createspace.com/5502922

I Just Want To See Trees: A Journey Through PTSD (Marc Raciti, Jones Media

Publishing, 2016). Written and told by a retired Army veteran, this is a personal narrative of one courageous soldier’s fight with PTSD. Marc shares his journey through his deployment overseas and his ensuing constant struggle with the symptoms of PTSD. He’s now on a mission to share his story and serve as a resource and confidant for the PTSD community with his nonprofit program, Healing Wounds. http://www.marcraciti.com/

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Addiction, Recovery, Change: A Howto Manual for Successfully Navigating Sobriety (Adams Recovery Center,

Kicam Projects, LLC, 2016). Are you working to build a new life of sustained sobriety? Are you a sober support for a loved one who’s trying to move past addiction? This book provides the tools you need to meet the everyday challenges of getting sober and staying sober.

http://kicamprojects.com/shop/addictionrecovery-change/

Spring 2017

Authors! Bloggers! Filmmakers! Recording Artists! App Developers! In Recovery Magazine is a one-stop solution for all your advertising needs. Effective advertising leads to more earnings for you. Our low-cost advertising will showcase your product in print and in digital formats, and will deliver it to our national and international readership. Take the plunge; youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re worth it! Contact us @

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Book Review by Lena H.

Beyond Belief: Agnostic Musings for 12 Step Life by Joe C.

This is a very different daily reader. Unlike typical Twelve Step readers, this one is for musing.

appropriate. Sources are as diverse as Martin Luther King, Wikipedia, Anne Frank and the Eagles. Each quote leads into Joe’s engaging paragraphs of reflection, and each page ends with a relevant, thought-provoking question, or two or three. “A funny thing happened to me on my way to the new millennium,” begins Joe C.’s preface. With that, we are launched into an updated world, unlike that of any other recovery-related daily reader I know. The author, for years a “closet agnostic,” discovered only through the Internet a “community of nonbelievers in recovery.” When he couldn’t find a daily reader that wasn’t “based on a monotheistic worldview,” he wrote this one. Bless him for taking the time to research and document amazing amounts of information and ideas related to his work: philosophy and psychology; mythology and metaphysics; beliefs, non-beliefs and beyond. He has included 17 pages of end notes, a seven-page bibliography, and an eight-page index, the latter directing the reader to topics as standard in recovery lingo as “denial,” “higher power” and “responsibility,” and others as esoteric as “brain chemistry,” “global issues” and “Zen.” Joe C. begins each page with a quote, including the author’s name and birth and death dates, if

This is a very different daily reader. A paperback trade book, it is two times the size and heft of the Twelve Step program readers that I’m used to. Each page is chock-full of ideas to muse upon, per the book’s title; not to latch onto and be soothed by, as shorter, simpler program readers intend. Rather, this reader is meant to ponder and re-ponder, perhaps even to grapple with. Take October 13th, which talks about Transactional Analysis (TA), “a school of psychology that charts how we trigger and are triggered by others.” Having decades ago experienced therapy based on TA, I was captivated by the author’s concise, simple explanation of it, and of how it dovetails with the Twelve Step principles I’ve learned. According to Joe C., TA’s mature Adult ego-state refrains from being triggered by saying, “You may be right. I will consider every option.” This is counter to its other two states, the rebellious Child and critical Parent. Sounds like the Twelve Steps to me: Through identifying triggers in a traditional AA-type program, the follower is often guided to respond in just such a TA-adult, nonreactive way.

In Recovery Magazine

Shining through in these entries is the bright fact that constructs such as TA, beyond and apart from recovery’s AA-type programs, can shed light on our way along the Steps. Of course, there’s the “agnostic” element as well. If you’re averse to the Twelve Steps’ repeated invocation of that old male Christian “God,” Joe C.’s readings make clear that sources of that crucial greater power exist by other names and in other places, and recovery can occur without your pinning them down. Throughout his book, the author delves into arcane and off-beat topics, writing of magnetic resonance imaging, toxic psychology and Adult Child Syndrome (ACS), “a syndrome that tells us we don’t have a syndrome.” Piquant statements grab attention. September 16th asks, “Can I dream big dreams without placing both feet firmly in mid-air?” June 22nd offers the following: “Reification and dogma raise ye olde cult-barometer.” October 12th suggests, “The steps offer sobriety – not Shangri-La.” New Years Eve opens with a quote by Bill W.: “Let us never fear needed change.” In parting, we’re asked, “This year, did I face the challenge of change with courage?” Those content to call their Higher Power “God” may find some of Joe C.’s readings a challenge to digest; but for those seeking a change, this book provides much enriching food for thought.

Beyond Belief: Agnostic Musings for 12 Step Life Joe C. Rebellion Dogs Publishing

Spring 2017

Serene

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In Recovery Magazine

by John Shinholser

y the time you read this, we will have a somewhat better idea of where our White House is heading with recovery and treatment initiatives. Recovery residences (sober living homes) will be a huge issue in the coming months and years, perhaps even greater than anyone can imagine. With this issue must come a mammoth effort by all of us to ensure their growth and survival. Mark my words, the career bureaucrats and criminal justice zealots will attack this rapidly emerging recovery movement.

the common good of our substance abuse treatment and recovery industry. There are millions of workers in this field, as well as over 50 million potential consumers. Don’t tell me we can’t get better organized to work toward our own “hour of need.”

This unique area of recovery is a great tool for the rest of the field, if managed responsibly. Imagine no longer worrying about a newcomer going back into a negative living situation. The landscape without recovery residences is bleak at best. Make no mistake, recovery residences are lowering jail and prison bed counts. We, the people of the recovery and treatment industry, can either champion the successful recovery resident industry or pay exorbitant taxes for a never-ending, bloated industrial prison complex.

addiction as a criminal justice issue, however, we just get a

Are you considering coming to Prescott Arizona for treatment? Or maybe So here we educated, intelligent community. nation with the you jsut want to relocate there because it’sare,a an great recovery experience of hundreds of years. We know when we treat

addiction as an illness and not a criminal justice problem Whatever the reason, make sure you visit us at Serenity Place, we’ll we getcome a positive, measurable outcome. When we treat

welcome you with open arms. Serenity Place, Prescott . . . recovery in a larger criminal justice system. Hmmm. small town with a big heart.

The knowledge that recovery housing is available the same hour an addict seeks help gives us an advantage for a “best outcome.” This includes same day access to appropriate medical detox and an appropriate recovery environment, whether it be specialty treatment, a quality recovery community center, responsible recovery residence or Recovery Oriented System of Care (ROSOC) correctional situation. The point is, all must be available the same hour of need! “Same hour of need” is actually a part of our national DNA. We get gas the same hour we need it, we go to a restaurant when we require sustenance, to the emergency room for care, etc. The concept of “same hour of need” is all around us. It amazes me how we can arrest and lock up an addict or an alcoholic the same hour they act out in some form of public safety violation, but prior to that violation we have no means of helping that same person in that same hour of need. What is more disgraceful is that as a nation we know this to be true, yet we accept this as status quo.

The treatment community needs entry-level detox, inpatient, outpatient, individual therapy, counseling, medically-assisted services and recovery supports including ROSOC programs. The burden to continue the fight for better access to appropriate services at all levels of need rests solely upon those in recovery and those working in the field in correctional environments and in our communities. Let 2017 be the year we look back upon 50 years from now and say: “That was the year we turned the tide for good on the stigma associated with addiction, the year we came together and stayed together as a voice and face of recovery. 2017 was the year treatment, the recovery community and all the other allies of concern forever shifted our culture away from exploiting the members of our Great Society suffering from addiction.”

“Same hour of need” is not a farfetched notion once we understand how potent we can be if we work together for 32

In Recovery Magazine

John Shinholser is the President of the McShin Foundation, founded in 2004 in Richmond, Virginia, by John and his wife, Carol McDaid. John has dedicated his life to helping individuals and families in or seeking recovery from the disease of addiction. mcshin.org

Spring 2017

The great thing about small towns is you always know where your friends are.

The next time you’re in Prescott, Arizona, visit us at Serenity Place, where you’ll always find a friend.

Open 7 days a week For meeting schedules go to

www.serenityplaceprescott.org

Serenity Place 12 step meeting hall

Prescott

1040 Whipple Street, Bldg. 400 Prescott, Arizona 86301 Spring 2017

928.614.1759

(Behind True Value Hardware. It’s the third building in the back) In Recovery Magazine

Getting Down to Business:

R E Y B U BEWARE!

by Carey Davidson

our family is in chaos. You don’t know what help looks like, but you do know you desperately need help for yourself or someone you love who is struggling with addiction. You search the Internet for help and click on the first result promoting “free treatment placement services.” You believe you are on the right track, and you are relieved to discover a vast array of programs and professionals that seem willing and able to help. Unfortunately, while there are many ethical and outstanding professionals who are eager to help, not every specialist or treatment facility is transparent about their practices and how they are “filling their beds.” It is also important to read between the lines. That website you’ve just found could be a prime example of referrals gone awry. While services may be listed as complimentary, there is always someone paying for these placement specialists. Whether it is a behavioral health professional or an online service, the interest and obligation of the treatment placement specialist should be to find the best care for someone who needs help, not who will pay them the most for a referral. Some treatment centers and professionals give these placement companies a profile of their ideal client, but these profiles are not necessarily geared toward what your family is struggling with or to the complex problems unique to your situation. Instead, they may be more interested in how much money you have and what you are willing to pay. These treatment specialists ask for your insurance information and self-pay capability. You may be ranked solely by your wealth and/or insurance. The treatment provider who calls you is likely from a company that paid anywhere from $49 to $10,000 for the lead and is making a full effort to get you into their facility. The likelihood of being admitted to treatment depends on how hot of a lead you are and what you or your insurance will pay. Some of these placement companies have television commercials, billboards and radio advertisements all promising to assist you in finding help. What they don’t mention is that the only perfect places are the ones that are willing to pay for you as a “lead.”

Let’s Draw a Comparison. You take your sick child to the emergency room. Once there, the doctor explains that your child has a potentially life-threatening brain tumor that requires surgery. You ask the doctor to recommend the best neurosurgeon in town. The doctor knows of two neurosurgeons who specialize in the type of procedure required. One does a decent job but has recently settled a malpractice suit. Due to the lawsuit, his referrals have decreased and he’s mentioned he would be willing to give your doctor a cut of the profits for any surgery sent his way. The other neurosurgeon is one of the best in the field. Her schedule is often full, but your doctor has a good relationship with her and knows he can ask her to find time to perform the procedure. The doctor writes down the office number of the first neurosurgeon and tells you with a reassuring smile that he’s the better option. You walk out of his office unaware that your child’s wellbeing was compromised for financial gain. This should be an absurd and fictional scenario. It is difficult to imagine a professional who would compromise the quality of their patient’s care because of money, but it happens. If you have a loved one in need of help, ask the following question of the behavioral health professionals assisting you in finding treatment: Are you employed, contracted or financially incentivized to put someone in a specific treatment center? If the answer is “yes,” know that the financial incentive could influence the recommendation being made. Professionals worth hiring will use a clinical rationale to recommend a treatment provider. An ethical professional will not be defensive and will not mind telling you if they are being compensated for the referral. A lack of transparency about the financial flow is often indicative of deeper ethical problems. Buyer, beware!

In Recovery Magazine

Carey Davidson, MAC, CIP, ICADAC, CAI, is an intervention specialist who entered the field of addiction out of a sincere desire to help others. He holds a MA from the Hazelden Graduate School of Addiction Studies, is president of the Network of Independent Interventionists, sits on the Board of Certification of Addiction Counselors and is a member of the Association of Intervention Specialists. http://www.hayes-davidson.com

Spring 2017

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A Changing Land I

ended up in the addiction industry quite by accident. Twenty years ago, I was working for waste management and living with the director of a sober living house (SLH) in West Palm Beach. I had no interest in doing what my roommate was doing. One day, however, a client at the sober living home was in need of some help. While sitting at the dinner table with the homeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s current manager, the owner and my roommate, I was asked to sit down with their client and share my personal experience. He was a 19-year-old heroin addict who was getting ready to leave the facility and go back to Philadelphia to get loaded. I proceeded to tell him my story. As a result, he decided to stay. Today, that 19-year-old heroin addict is 39 years old, has a wife, two little girls and a painting business. The feeling I had as we talked about our recovery and our commonality drew me to this field. I spent the next four years working with the new guys who came into that recovery home, and I wound up devoting my life to this endeavor. 36

My passion and desire was to help those still struggling with alcohol and addiction. I personally had never believed there was a solution to my own problem, and that I would die a slow and lonely death like so many of the people I grew up around. So I viewed this as an opportunity to turn my greatest liability intoÂ my greatest asset. My goal was not for financial gain, but instead for spiritual and emotional benefit. Each individual who came through the doors of that SLH was another asset and another person who could pay forward the message that recovery is possible. The treatment landscape has changed in countless ways. Many individuals are coming into this industry with motives that are not aligned with integrity or with the best practices for sick and suffering individuals in desperate need of help, guidance and hope for a better way of life. The best way to combat this problem is to work toward a common goal of providing the best care possible. What keeps me going is the hope that there will be positive results in the near future from some of the advocacy positions recently taken by my

In Recovery Magazine

Spring 2017

and 171 violations discovered. These investigations have led to a reversal of previously denied claims. On March 29, 2016, President Obama created the White House Parity Task Force in order to ensure direct oversight into parity compliance by insurance carriers. Prior to this task force, insurance companies policed themselves internally. Billing Solutions continues to ensure that its clients and the patients they serve receive unprecedented advocacy on all fronts. This past winter, we merged with Syncordia Healthcare and Technologies. The Billing Solutions management team worked to develop business intelligence that would lead to the creation of a sophisticated software tool for both internal and external efficiencies. Syncordia’s approach to revenue cycle management and software solutions has been extremely impressive. They have a compelling execution strategy and vision, and are well positioned to be a driving force in the revenue cycle management industry. The partnership between Billing Solutions and Syncordia is highly complementary to our future vision. We may have the billing expertise, but the Syncordia Cloud brings a level of technical software expertise that has been missing from our organization. This proficiency will help us to better serve our clients.

by Jimmy Rizzo

dscape

I know from being on the provider side for so many years that when revenue is down and sometimes even when it’s great, the thought is, “I should bring billing in-house.” In my experience, especially in recent years, programs are finding it increasingly difficult to keep up with the unpredictable landscape and regulations of the insurance companies. A verification of benefits takes 90 minutes. Utilization review and insurance criteria are ever-changing, and medical billing coding has become a challenge – never mind the montage of underpayments.

I have always subscribed to recognizing core competencies. If your company is a treatment center, provide the best care to the patients you serve. If you manage a billing company, be transparent, honest and integrity-driven. Every billing company charges their clients a percentage, which in essence creates a partnership where each party works together to achieve the highest level of success with both patient care and financial reimbursement. This is how we keep the doors open to help those in need. company, Billing Solutions, and other organizations. I never thought that being a business owner would entail so much work! Even with the Syncordia merger, I am On October 3, 2008, the Mental Health Parity Addiction working harder now than ever before. Fortunately, the and Equity Act (MHPAEA) was signed into law, providing joys in my life help me balance all of that. One of my protection for treatment limitations affecting the frequency proudest moments came this past September when I took of treatment, number of visits and days of coverage. Now, my son, Zachary, to tour Julliard for possible admission. the financial requirements applicable to mental health and substance abuse benefits can be no more restrictive than When I spend time playing with my daughter, Gianna, or predominant financial requirements applied to all medical hold my new baby, Dominic, I realize I have a life beyond and surgical benefits. anything I could have ever imagined. My wife, Jenny, supports me both spiritually and emotionally and keeps Every day, the Billing Solutions verifications department, me grounded. She reminds me that nothing happens in utilization review staff and collection teams run into God’s world by mistake. He is in charge. Knowing that is various violations of this law. Our company and others have all I need. partnered with a team of lobbyists to ensure that our cases are documented and recorded for quarterly presentation to the Department of Labor, Health and Human Services Jimmy Rizzo is a dedicated husband and father, and the founder and CEO of Billing Solutions. He has over 20 years of experience in industry billing and as a treatment and to the US Treasury Parity Violation Subcommittee. provider. He is passionate and motivated to do everything he can to see that the substance abuse industry stays true to its primary and most important role, helping those Our efforts have been fruitful. From October 2010 through who need it. www.billingsolutions.net September 2015, 1,515 investigations have been launched

Spring 2017

In Recovery Magazine

Author Robert Burney, MA, of Encinitas, California, a pioneer in the field of inner child healing and codependency recovery, has been called “a metaphysical Stephen Hawking.” His bestselling book, Codependence: The Dance of Wounded Souls, has been described as “one of the truly transformational works of our time.” A grief therapist, codependency counselor and spiritual teacher whose work is often compared to the work of John Bradshaw, his efforts are firmly grounded on Twelve Step spiritual principles and emotional energy release/grief process therapy, learned in his own personal recovery. Robert has worked in both inpatient and outpatient chemical dependency treatment programs with adults and adolescents, and is a recovering alcoholic and drug addict who has been clean and sober since January 3, 1984. Through his blog, website and his new book he shares his experience, strength and hope as part of his own ongoing healing and recovery process. According to Burney, that is how the ancient wisdom of the Twelve Step Principles works.

“I share my Truth and self as a joyous expression of my Spiritual Being because it is what I need to do for me. Giving and receiving is what keeps the healing energy flowing for me. I have learned that through sharing and giving what I have received, I am healing myself. It is my way of standing up for my Truth and of honoring ‘All My Relations,’ a Native American term that refers to the Great Spirit, whose essence is present in everyone and everything. I do this in honor and service to my belief that the ultimate, eternal, blessed Truth is that we are all ONE. We are all perfect parts of the Oneness of All That Is, which is the Universal Creative God-Force.”

Don St. John and his wife, Diane, of Salt Lake City, Utah, are the cofounders of Paths of Connection and the developers of The Sacred Intimacy Process. Together, they are exploring “the frontiers of well-being.” For over 25 years, they have been teaching and coaching side-by-side in psychotherapy, relationship therapy and somatic therapy. Diane specializes in helping clients shift their perceptual views and understandings using the EVOX system to objectively measure and optimally manage patients with memory loss, cognitive impairment and other stressrelated conditions. Don studied Gestalt Therapy at the LA Gestalt Therapy Institute. He is also a somatic-relational psychotherapist, workshop leader and author of the awardwinning book, Healing the Wounds of Childhood. Both Don and Diane are authorized Continuum Movement teachers. Don is also a Hellerwork Structural Integration practitioner and trainer. He has presented and taught in the US, Canada, New Zealand and Brazil. Don’s doctoral dissertation, written at the Western Institute for Social Research, focused on the consequences of and recovery from relational maltreatment in early childhood. They offer many workshops, including their most popular, Growing into Wholeness. When not teaching, Don and Diane enjoy spending time with their two granddaughters. Don is an avid golfer, and he and Diane recently started ballroom and salsa dance lessons. Don shared, “One might be surprised to know that between the ages of nine and 15, my dream was to be a professional prizefighter.” http://www.pathsofconnection.com\

http://www.recoverycodependence.com 38

In Recovery Magazine

Spring 2017

The Authors’ Café by Catherine Townsend-Lyon

Many people are born with a calling and life mission, and David E. McCauley of Wyckoff, New Jersey, is one of those people. He is the founder, CEO and 27-year Chairman of the Board of the Oak Valley Foundation and the author of Addiction to Recovery: Unlocking your Potential, a mind, body and spiritual approach and reference guide on how to do the inner work necessary to be successful in recovery. A portion of the proceeds from his book go to the Oak Valley Foundation, a nonprofit organization that assists those in need of treatment. David began his recovery journey in 1989 while attending a Twelve Step group, but became discouraged by this form of recovery. Over the years, he worked in many addiction and recovery settings. He received his certification in drug and alcohol counseling and social work. He ran his own outpatient program for 15 years. In 1998, one drink at an airport bar changed the course of his life. All of his hard work and personal success was wiped away by a single relapse. Today, through speaking engagements, advocacy, his book and the foundation, he shares his story and the life lessons he has learned. “It is my journey of internal soul-searching, faith, resilience, perseverance, self-preservation and learning to never give up on the path from the depths of destruction to a profound new life. We possess the innate ability to find our true selves, rise above life’s trials, tribulations and addiction and gain an understanding of the real meaning of life.” In his free time, David enjoys reading recovery-related books and novels. His hobbies are hiking, camping, fishing, quad riding and travel. His long-range goal is to open a treatment center. http://www.oakvalleyfoundation.com Spring 2017

First-time author Matthew Rupert of Loveland, Ohio, is a licensed professional clinical counselor and a licensed independent chemical dependency counselor in the State of Ohio. Adam works for Adams Recovery Center. His first book, entitled Addiction, Recovery, Change: A How-To Manual for Successfully Navigating Sobriety, provides the tools needed to meet the everyday challenges of not just getting sober, but staying sober. His publisher, KiCam Projects, donates a portion of the proceeds from their books, films and music to nonprofit organizations. Matthew was selected by KiCam to write the book because of his professional background and decades of hands-on experience in the fields of addiction, substance abuse and mental health. When I asked Matthew what was the most important thing he wanted his readers to learn, he replied: “As individuals come out of treatment for substance abuse, I want them to understand that sustaining longterm sobriety is going to take their active and proactive participation in recovery. I want them to learn and accept that recovery is a lifelong process.” Matthew and his wife, Suzanne, just celebrated ten years of marriage and are the happy parents of four cats. When he isn’t working, he referees college football. He’s also an avid videogamer and a passionate bass player. http://kicamprojects.com/shop/addiction-recoverychange/

In Recovery Magazine

Missing the Mark:

Can We Improve Addiction Treatment?

by Dr. Lilliam Rodriguez

ccording to the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism (NIAAA), 90% of alcoholics will experience one or more relapses during their first four years of recovery. Most addiction treatment programs reveal only a 5% success rate. Alarmingly, another recent study conducted by the National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse (NCASA) indicated that there is a major gap between current addiction treatment practices and the scientifically proven, evidence-based treatments that ensure long-term sobriety. I have been working as a doctor for ten years, studying and treating addiction. In this time, I have found that many therapists and doctors continue to miss the mark and fail to successfully treat addiction at a time when successful addiction treatment programs are most needed. Doctors and therapists often insist on following the same treatment paths, whether or not they work. As a result, families are frustrated and individuals fighting addiction are weary and defeated. Where does the addiction recovery community need to go from here? How can we improve today’s addiction treatment and successfully put individuals on the path to long-term sobriety? There are three pivotal questions on which the addiction recovery community must reflect. How do we define successful recovery? To craft more successful addiction treatment options, we must first understand what it means to have a successful recovery. In the past when I have worked with insurance providers and therapists, it was discouraging to see clinicians and doctors indicate that a client no longer needed medical care because the person had completed a recovery program and had been drug-free for 45 days or some other period of time.

would never discharge a patient because they had lowered their blood sugar and then simply prescribe they get involved with a self-help group. Similarly, individuals diagnosed with a substance use disorder require more than a month of medical treatment – most primary treatment programs last 30 days – before they are able to maintain remission from their disease. As the medical definition of addiction suggests, addiction is a chronic illness that requires long-term maintenance of the mind, body and spirit. Individuals looking for long-term sobriety must have long-term care, which may include any combination of the following: relapse-prevention medications and medical supervision; a variety of expressive therapies (i.e., equine, arts, yoga); and nutritional guidance and behavioral therapy. The way in which the medical field defines successful recovery plays a huge role in how addiction treatment is covered by insurance companies. In many cases, insurance providers drop coverage beyond 45 days because doctors do not deem post-recovery treatment to be medically necessary. Once a physician discharges a patient, insurance providers immediately stop covering critical treatments, including medication-assisted treatment, therapy that addresses co-occurring disorders, and relapse prevention programs that are often vital to ensuring long-term results. In order to improve addiction treatment, we must redefine a successful recovery. Sobriety is more than abstinence from drugs for 30-45 days. It requires long-term maintenance and health of the mind, body and spirit. Are scientifically proven, evidence-based treatments an option? Another factor to consider is whether modern, evidence-based treatments are being integrated into existing options. Many addiction recovery programs incorporate some form of the Twelve Step program. The Twelve Step program was adopted in the 1950s, during a time when addiction was rarely recognized as a medical issue.

Let’s compare this approach with another chronic disease, diabetes. A doctor would never tell a patient with type 2 diabetes that they no longer needed medical treatment because they had kept their blood sugar down for a few months. Likewise, a doctor

In Recovery Magazine

Spring 2017

Few treatment centers are incorporating evidence-based practices or research-backed treatments into existing programs. The aforementioned NCASA study found that few individuals received these types of addiction treatment. Sadly, the individuals who run many treatment facilities lack sufficient medical training or the necessary experience and expertise to treat a chronic disease. These programs are in dire need of an update to more modern, scientifically proven practices. “One-size-fits-all” programs must begin offering specialized, multimodal treatment plans including medical treatment for physical conditions, marital counseling, psychiatric treatment, vocational and educational rehabilitation. To be successful, providers also need to understand that each client is different, and addiction treatment requires multiple approaches.

Providing education and therapy for families is essential to creating a positive environment for individuals completing treatment. Too often, individuals complete detoxification and return home, only to relapse again, largely because systemic family dynamics have not been addressed and the same triggers for relapse continue. Including the family in today’s addiction treatment process is vital to improving overall success rates. Family behavioral therapy sessions, better addiction education and making family therapy mandatory are essential components in the initial recovery process.

Is the family a part of the process? Improving family dynamics has shown to significantly improve sober success rates. It is critical for addiction treatment centers to create greater opportunities for family and loved ones to be included in the recovery process.

Today’s treatment is antiquated. Our society is missing the mark when it comes to successfully treating addiction and ensuring long-term sobriety. Antiquated processes and under-qualified staff present many challenges. In order to change this trend and improve success rates, we must encourage the addiction community to rethink the definition of successful recovery, incorporate modern, scientifically-proven treatment options, and provide better opportunities to educate and involve families into the initial and continuing recovery process. z8

Some programs still provide a one-time only family visit and, if any, very limited family therapy. At many smaller treatment facilities, the only family assistance given is in the form of an informational pamphlet outlining the disease of addiction and providing local contacts for family therapy.

Dr. Lilliam Rodriguez, CEO of Paradigm Behavioral Health Solutions, is passionate about improving today’s addiction recovery process and recovery success rates. A doctoral graduate from Carlos Albizu University and clinical psychology graduate from the University of Puerto Rico, she has over a decade of experience the study and treatment of the disease of addiction, co-occurring disorders and trauma. lilliamrodriguez@paradigmbehavioralhealth.com

Spring 2017

In Recovery Magazine

Facing Addiction by Michael King

n October 4, 2015, despite hurricane and flooding threats, tens of thousands of people from around the world stood shoulder-toshoulder for the first time to unite and end the silence about addiction. On that rainy day in Washington, DC, at the base of the Washington Monument, Facing Addiction was born in quite a dramatic fashion. Perhaps even more important than that first day was the massive chain reaction that began the day after. Blearyeyed and with shoes still muddy from rocking with Steven Tyler late into the night before, more than 400 people from 48 states slogged to Capitol Hill to demand action from their representatives in Congress. This was the largest Hill Day of people impacted by addiction and recovery ever assembled in Washington, DC. Since that day, the Comprehensive Addiction and Recovery Act (CARA) was passed by Congress and was signed into law by the President. This was a monumental step forward in the history of the recovery movement in the United States, but we cannot rest on this achievement alone. There is much more work to be done. Facing Addiction is a national nonprofit organization dedicated to finding solutions to the addiction crisis by unifying the voice of the over 45 million Americans and their families directly impacted by addiction. Our vision is to annually bring together the best resources in the field to reduce the human and social costs of addiction until this public health crisis is eliminated. At the Republican and Democratic National Conventions 42

in July of 2016, Facing Addiction unveiled its advocacy and action agenda, developed with the guidance of more than 350 organizations from the Facing Addiction Action Network. This agenda provides a comprehensive approach toward ending this devastating public health crisis. The Action Network is the largest coalition of organizations ever assembled around addiction and recovery issues. Representation is diverse and includes people directly impacted by addiction, those in long-term recovery, family advocates, prevention and education leaders, public health specialists, labor officials, faith leaders, criminal justice professionals and many others. Facing Addiction was proud to partner with the United States Surgeon General on the November 2016 release of Facing Addiction in America: The Surgeon Generalâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Report on Alcohol, Drugs & Health. The agenda presented by Facing Addiction echoes the findings of this groundbreaking report. Humanizing Addiction for the Afflicted and Affected.

Due to longstanding stigma and discrimination, many people affected by addiction are afraid to speak up about failed policies and inadequate care. The majority of people in the recovery community has remained silent about their own experiences and successes, and has not voiced concerns about barriers keeping others from getting the help they need. Politicians assume they donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t vote. By providing uniform guidelines for working with elected officials, Facing Addiction aims to empower individuals and their families to share their stories and come up with

In Recovery Magazine

Spring 2017

possible solutions to the addiction problems in their communities. Addiction is Not a Crime. Simply put, our attempts to incarcerate our way out of the American addiction problem have proven to be immeasurably ineffective. As public perception shifts toward a public health response for addiction, so must our public safety responses. Facing Addiction is working with federal and local officials to develop more effective recovery programming for those currently involved in the criminal justice system, to establish strong recommendations based on successful diversion efforts, and to require re-entry programs to consider substance use disorders when allocating community resources. Expansion of Prevention, Screening and Early Intervention. Addiction is preventable and treatable.

Addressing addiction in its earliest stages is critical for stemming the national overdose epidemic. Since 90% of individuals with a substance use disorder begin use in their teens, we must more aggressively support youth prevention efforts. Facing Addiction’s Action Network aims to spread these efforts into health institutions and other community settings across the country; to develop a more comprehensive risk assessment survey for families; and to collect important, but often scattered, information into a central location for those in need of help and information.

Multiple Pathways of Recovery for Individuals and their Families. Every recovering individual has their own

personal journey. Facing Addiction does not advocate any specific path; rather, it supports the availability of information and resources to help individuals make informed choices. Working with national partners to develop more effective research on these multiple pathways, we will push for substantial increases in funding for recovery support services.

actions must match our rhetoric. In order to do this, Facing Addiction will continue the push for significant increases in funding for evidenced-based health services across the spectrum of need. We will work with accredited medical schools to identify gaps in curricula in order to better educate future doctors on addiction. We will also push for a 50-state implementation of the Mental Health Parity and Addiction Equity Act. To implement this action plan, Facing Addiction will need a tremendous amount of input, support and guidance from the hundreds of organizations that make up the Facing Addiction Action Network. Regardless of an organization’s area of focus within the addiction landscape, it has a vital role to play in developing this roadmap to change. We cannot develop a comprehensive response to the addiction crisis without the input of public health leaders, individuals, families, addiction experts and criminal justice allies. We cannot integrate addiction health services into the mainstream healthcare system without learning from the experiences of physicians and health professionals in the field. Addiction cannot be humanized without sharing the tragic stories of loss and the hopeful stories of the millions of Americans and their families who have found and sustained long-term recovery. Simply put, we need your support. Encourage your organization to join the Facing Addiction Action Network today. Visit our website and email me with any questions you may have. We hope you will continue Facing Addiction with us.

Mainstreaming Addiction Health Services. As we

Michael King lives in Seattle and is a person in long-term recovery. He is the National Director of Outreach & Engagement for Facing Addiction. Prior to this, he managed political campaigns, specializing in grassroots organizing strategies and communications. He’s the proud father of two young children. www.FacingAddiction.org, making@facingaddiction.org

address substance use disorders as a health issue, our

Spring 2017

In Recovery Magazine

enial is a mechanism our minds use to block out reality when we find the truth intolerable. Alcoholic denial is well known, but what’s rarely noted is that denial can be different for different drugs. We can see the difference in the words addicts use and the reality they deny.

The language of denial. Alcoholic denial is centered on not seeing that they’re addicted. So they say things to convince themselves that their drinking is not out of control: “I’m not an alcoholic,” “I still have my job,” and “I never drink before noon.” On the other hand, cigarette smokers usually admit they’re addicted. They use denial to rationalize not quitting: “It’s just too hard.” “Everyone has to die from something.” Denial keeps them from seeing that they’re needlessly killing themselves. Heroin denial lets addicts avoid seeing how completely the drug controls them. Instead, they think they can just decide to quit and that’s it. I’ve known heroin addicts who drove two hours daily for a year, and on each trip bought just enough dope for one day because they were certain it was the last time. Junkies say things like, “I’ve had enough,” “I’m through with it,” and “I’m done,” but they’re usually not. Heroin addicts have the highest relapse rate. Marijuana has its own denial. It’s the belief that there is absolutely nothing wrong with marijuana, pot is harmless. “It’s not addictive.” “It’s just a plant.” “It’s safer than alcohol.” “It’s medicine.” “George Washington grew it.” While it might sound like they’re arguing rationally, their inability to see marijuana’s dangers is a symptom of denial. Denial protects addicts from knowledge too painful to accept by letting them believe the exact opposite. For example, alcoholics can’t accept that they’re addicted, so they say, “I can take it or leave it.” For marijuana users, the reality they wish to avoid is that they’re wasting their lives. They tell themselves a life centered on marijuana is meaningful and

by Ed Gogek

In Recovery Magazine

Spring 2017

significant. “It’s great. It’s wonderful. Everyone should do it.” That’s the language of marijuana denial. What’s unique is that marijuana users defend the drug, not themselves. So while alcoholics insist they personally are not addicted, marijuana users insist that marijuana is not addictive. Alcoholics moan about the world mistreating them; pot smokers believe the world mistreats marijuana. Denial often persists in recovery. A Narcotics Anonymous pamphlet reminds newcomers, “We abstain from all drugs (and, yes, this means alcohol and marijuana, too).” Yet some recovering addicts insist marijuana doesn’t count. “It’s not a drug,” they say. This is marijuana denial – the belief that marijuana is never in the wrong – and it’s probably why users deny science and fight so hard for legalization. Denial of science. Marijuana users often cannot believe research that criticizes weed.

When I first got stoned, I was taking a high school debate class. The Vietnam War was raging and the environmental movement was brand new, but the only cause I cared to debate was legalizing weed. That’s how pot smokers think; nothing else matters. Three months after quitting weed, I no longer cared. My patients often say the same thing. Marijuana evangelism apparently begins when we start using and lessens or disappears when we quit. This means the relentless prolegalization activity of so many marijuana users is probably not rational behavior; it’s a symptom of using the drug. Pot turns many of us into proselytizers, but only for as long as we use it. The legalization movement. If marijuana can do no wrong and is mistreated by the world, then the ultimate way to right this wrong is to make it legal. Pot smokers often promote legalization from their first toke.

“It’s not addictive.” “It’s just a plant.” “It’s safer than alcohol.” “It’s medicine.”

For example, the best metaanalysis of the research on pot and driving published in the British Medical Journal in 2012 found that people who drive stoned are twice as likely to be involved in a serious or fatal accident. Yet a survey by Liberty Mutual found that most teenage marijuana users think they drive just as well when high. One third of them thought pot made them better drivers. In Washington State, fatal crashes caused by drivers testing positive for THC doubled the first year pot was legal, yet the drug’s supporters still say marijuana never killed anyone.

In 1969, only 4% of Americans had even tried marijuana, yet NORML – the first prolegalization group – was formed in 1970. No sooner had people started smoking weed than they organized to legalize it. Today, there are dozens of organizations, webzines, magazines and radio shows – all devoted to legalizing marijuana. There is no movement like this for any other drug. Millions of teens would like to drink legally, but they don’t protest to lower the legal age to 18. Crystal meth works for ADHD and depression, but there’s no demand for “medical meth.” There is no National Organization for the Reform of Heroin Laws. Political fervor is unique to marijuana.

Dozens of studies show that marijuana permanently harms the developing teenage brain and that heavy use doubles the dropout rate. As adults, former teenage users typically earn less and are more likely to be unemployed or on welfare. The high potency weed sold in stores and dispensaries is linked to psychotic disorders and suicide, yet marijuana is still promoted as a safe drug, and record numbers of teens now think it’s harmless.

On July 4, 2013, marijuana activists arranged to have an American flag made of hemp flown over the US Capitol. This is a perfect image of how they think. They elevate marijuana over everything. It is their one true allegiance.

Treatment programs regularly see patients who spend all of their money on pot because they can’t stop using, yet marijuana users still claim that it’s not addictive.

For the most passionately motivated, the belief that marijuana is treated unfairly seems to come with using the drug and leaves when they get clean and sober. If so, the cure is not to legalize marijuana; the cure is to stop using it.

It’s not that marijuana users don’t understand science. Denial means they can’t even consider the science.

Marijuana is nothing more than another addictive drug, so what makes marijuana users exalt it, defend it and fervently strive to legalize it?

Marijuana evangelism. In the 1970 book, A Child’s Garden of Grass, the authors wrote, “Grass smokers are the world’s greatest proselytizers.” They are. People who believe their drug of choice can do no wrong don’t just tell their friends, they tell the world. Spring 2017

In Recovery Magazine

Ed Gogek is an Arizona psychiatrist who has treated thousands of addicts and alcoholics in jails, prisons, homeless clinics and many substance abuse treatment programs. His op-eds have appeared in over a dozen major US newspapers. He is the author of the book, Marijuana Debunked: A handbook for parents, pundits, and politicians who want to know the case against legalization. http://www.marijuanadebunked.com

by Laura O’Reilly

It’s Not Just Pot Anymore by Jody Belsher

y husband and I thought it was “just pot.” We had no idea our son’s teenage marijuana use could lead to a path of negative outcomes, including addiction and mental illness. When I was a kid in the 60s and 70s, the THC content in pot was roughly between 1-3%. It was a shock to learn that today’s marijuana tests from 15-25% THC on average, and in concentrated forms, up to 98%. This classifies today’s cannabis as a hallucinogenic drug with possible grave effects on developing brains. Use of today’s cannabis has caused dramatic increases in psychotic episodes in adolescents and young adults whose brains are still forming. This potent level of THC has been linked to triggering schizophrenia, as well as other mental illnesses such as major depression and anxiety disorders. Our son easily obtained a medical marijuana card. There were no background checks or visual checks, which would have clearly indicated he was not well. He was able to purchase “medical” marijuana identical to “recreational” pot, just after checking out of a psych hospital. He had a valid, physician prescribed medical card, so he had the right to purchase the drug. Before long, he was exhibiting suicidal ideation and ended up back in the hospital. Our beautiful child was not well. We were told our son had a cannabis-induced psychosis. We had never heard of such a thing. He had been a good student, an avid reader, a star athlete, and he had many friends and a loving family. He began raging, lying and stealing. He chose to live on the street rather than in the comfort of our home or his apartment. He lost his car, his job, his personal belongings, his girlfriend – he lost his life compass. We tried to persuade him to quit using cannabis, but the drug had hijacked his brain. Things spiraled out of control. He consumed it, and it consumed him in every way.

After spending two miserable years watching my son’s life spiral out of control, I decided I had to do something. As a musician and songwriter, I began writing and performing songs about recovery. Over time, I began to realize that my music could connect with others’ experiences. While on the set filming the video for my song “Gather the Dreams,” I had the epiphany that I could create a documentary to help others understand today’s marijuana. I flew to Boston and met with the top Harvard researchers on marijuana and the brain. From there I went to Inserm, the French National Institute of Health and Medical Research, then to Colorado, Illinois and throughout California to learn more about this “innocuous” drug. My findings were startling. I experienced many miraculous events and powerful interviews. Fallout from this “harmless” drug seemed to be happening everywhere. It became my mission to educate the public on the negative effects of this drug. Marijuana, it turns out, is a stubborn addiction. We have yet to realize the impact on our youth, as well as on society in general, from long-term use of new strains of potent marijuana developed primarily over the past decade. Many recovering addicts feel it is okay to use marijuana instead of their drug of choice – some continue to use despite negative consequences. Fueled by society’s current love affair with this drug, it is perceived as a harmless, natural plant. Tobacco, too, was once thought to be harmless. Over time, however, we came to realize the physical side effects in the form of lung cancer, among others. Not surprisingly, it is this same industry that is most interested in addicting our children to marijuana. In states where marijuana use is legal, they are targeting young people with ads for edibles that include gummy bears, pop tarts and sodas.

In Recovery Magazine

Spring 2017

We are only slowly beginning to recognize the dangers of marijuana. The 2013 edition of the APA’s Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5) added cannabis withdrawal, one of the cannabis-related disorders, as a diagnosis. Pot withdrawal causes issues with sleep, appetite and cognitive abilities, and often also includes depression and anxiety. Many people erroneously believe that if marijuana is legalized, the issue of excessive incarceration will be solved. However, imprisonment for marijuana possession by itself is rare. A 2004 Justice Department survey reported that nearly all of those sentenced to federal prison for any drugrelated crime during that year-long period were sent to prison for something more serious than simple possession. Studies from states where pot has been legalized indicate the black market continues to thrive by undercutting the price of taxed products. This in turn decreases the anticipated tax gains. Additionally, even organic varieties of marijuana are testing positive for harmful pesticides, mold and bacteria, presenting serious health dangers.

chambers, exercise and cognitive behavioral therapies are having positive impacts on those who make the decision to get clean. Will my son find sobriety? We continue to hope for that day. When he is ready, we will be there for him. Meanwhile, I continue to educate and encourage prevention measures both in the home and in school, to identify at-risk youth, to support campaigns for healthy lifestyles and to educate professionals, many of whom are not familiar with the negative outcomes of today’s cannabis. As a certified recovery support specialist, I am able to assist individuals and families with marijuana use disorders. I speak at conferences and to parents and show my documentary to help people understand that this is not just pot anymore. My film, The Other Side of Cannabis: Negative Effects of Marijuana on Our Youth, has won Best Documentary at the Sunset Los Angeles Film Festival and is now being shown worldwide.

How can people find a solid recovery from cannabis addiction and marijuana use disorders? We are beginning to see treatment programs addressing this addiction, but the answer is the same as with any addiction: it begins with the individual’s desire to quit. Programs utilizing healthy foods, lifestyle changes, nutriceuticals, hyperbaric

Jody Belsher is a documentary producer and director. She is a master’s candidate in addiction studies, a certified recovery support specialist, a certified lifestyle coach and holds a degree in social work. www.oscdoc.com

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RECOVERY CAN MEAN MANY THINGS. HERE, IT MEANS FINDING YOUR TRUE NORTH. LakeviewHealth.com/findanswers or call 866.314.5750

Spring 2017

In Recovery Magazine

The

International

by Debra Selkirk

smooth ride. Alcoholic liver disease rears its ugly head and puts the physical health of a person living with alcohol addiction at risk. They are no longer in control of their lives or their futures.

In their journey to recovery, real people hit rock bottom, find sober alternatives and attend a Twelve Step program. They discover they are not alone; hopeful and inspiring, they find a safe route to a sober life.

On November 7, 2010, my husband, Mark, was diagnosed with acute liver failure, caused by alcohol addiction. He needed a liver transplant. We soon discovered that there was an “international standard” that required him to prove abstinence for six months before doctors would assess him for a transplant.

For others, however, the road to recovery is a less-than-

He had only been sober three weeks. He didn’t qualify.

lcoholic liver disease. It’s an ugly term, one many people do not come across on the road to recovery. It encompasses diagnoses of fatty liver, alcoholic hepatitis and chronic hepatitis with liver fibrosis or cirrhosis. It is the major cause of liver disease deaths in North America.

In Recovery Magazine

Spring 2017

Standard For 17 days, I watched his health decline. He died on November 24, 2010. For nearly two years afterward, when people asked what happened to him, I would say he got sick and died. I was ashamed to tell the truth. Then I discovered that Canadian laws protect the rights of those suffering from disabilities, which include alcohol addiction. I was ashamed I had ever been ashamed. Painfully, I also discovered that the “international standard” was not based in fact. Over the past 30 years, studies have consistently concluded that the majority of persons suffering from liver failure caused by alcohol addiction do not drink again after a transplant. After the transplant, they have the same or a better prognosis than patients with other types of liver disease. There is no medical benefit for making someone prove abstinence for six months. Many physicians in the field want to end this standard, which isn’t even followed at many transplant centers. Now, I was angry. In that moment, my life veered off in a very different direction. Overnight I became an advocate for the rights of persons living with alcohol addiction. With this shift, I found a new purpose: to end the “international standard” of the six-month wait. I cannot bring my husband back. I cannot change his fate. However, I do believe that if I stay focused and work hard, I can help to save the lives of other people who may need a transplant at some point in their recovery. I will not rest until this work is done, at least here in Canada. Only then will I move on to another project. I dream of a holistic program that assesses the needs of a person living with addiction and has a system in place to address every element: medical, physical, social and psychological. I saw firsthand that recovery is not always a linear walk toward sobriety. I saw critical physical illness, intolerable cravings and emotional angst. I saw that my husband’s story could have been changed so many times along the way, if only he’d had a team of experts on his side.

When Mark first experienced health issues related to his liver, his hepatologist did an excellent job at restoring its function. She took care of his symptoms, but not his disease. On his own, with no support, he managed to remain sober for nearly three years before ultimately relapsing. It could have and should have been different. A nutritionist would have helped him understand how the food he ate would ultimately worsen his condition. Pizza and steak, his favorites, should have been taken off his menu, and a healthier eating plan created in their place. An addiction specialist might have worked with him to cope with his cravings and perhaps prescribe medication to calm them. A psychologist could have helped him reach a better place, so the loss of his brother at a young age no longer plagued him. Thankfully, social factors did not play a role in Mark’s disease. For others, however, successful recovery can be more difficult to attain without the support of their spouse, family, friends or without adequate income, employment or housing. No one should be left on their own to piece their lives back together, or to feel they have failed when they temporarily relapse. People deserve a system that supports them in every aspect of their disease and helps them create a healthier life. This system has become my personal mission. Every day, I hold present the words of Mark Twain, “The two most important days of your life are the day you were born, and the day you find out why.” For me, that day was September 28, 2012, the day I discovered the truth behind the circumstances of Mark’s death and began to research the information I would need to right that wrong. These last four years are only the beginning. I have so much left to do. Debra Selkirk lives in Toronto, Ontario, Canada. She became a human rights advocate for persons living with alcohol addiction after losing her husband, Mark. She blogs about the progress in her work on her website, and tweets under @TalkOutLoud. www.debraselkirk.com

Chaos and Clutter Free

Shove Out the Shame and Drive Your Car In

8 Ways to Get Your Garage in Gear

Danielle Wurth of Wurth Organizing, LLC

fter a bustling day of work, school or sports, my labeled and colorful garage totes welcome me home. From sports equipment to laundry to household items to cases of organizing products, every item belongs to a theme which is stored in a well-labeled zone in a specific location. While the garage is the toughest, dirtiest and most challenging space to tackle, it ironically is my favorite area to organize. Upon completion, it hugs me back in daily gratitude. Being efficient with time and energy is important, and organizing requires the right tools and planning before you start. Time to roll up your sleeves and start building an Organizer Tool Kit™

Go on a scavenger hunt around your house and gather the following tools to tackle the most intense garage spaces: Clipboard with your favorite writing pen or pencil attached. You’ll lose your pen a hundred times if it isn’t attached with ribbon or string. Been there, done that. One of each of the following: Sharpie marker seriously sharp scissors box of kitchen-sized garbage bags clear packing tape disinfectant wipes to sanitize your items and the area as you work roll of blue or green painters’ tape A number of each of the following items: binder clips paper clips (jumbo preferred) rubber bands large adhesive mailing labels plastic grocery bags

the beauty of banker boxes

This go-to organizing solution is a fan favorite. It is inexpensive, easy to assemble, lightweight, and makes for nice clean stacking. If large items are in your zones, then plastic totes are a better choice. Do a combo of each if the budget allows. Designate your first box as your Organizer Tool Kit™. Don’t be a perfectionist. Focus on the importance of storing the items listed below in a box versus across your kitchen table.

designate your zones

Think of your garage in terms of aisles in a hardware store. This visually helps you kick start the zone themes in your space. Using your Sharpie marker, using capital letters, jot your zones on pieces of painters tape and adhere to the front of your boxes. I prefer not writing directly on the box fronts this early in the organizing phase; it is possible your titles will change over time or you might repurpose a box. Painting, Gardening, Electrical, Plumbing, Tools, Household Gadgets, Cleaning Supplies, Sports or Hobbies are a few common zone labels to consider.

time to purge and process

Pour a cup of strong coffee and turn up the tunes! Start with the simplest items and place them accordingly into each themed box. This will get your mojo moving as you gain confidence in your decision-making skills. Label boxes for items to give to friends, to consign or for Craigslist.

“The more decisions you make the less energy it will take.™”

“My front door greets my guests, but my garage door greets my family.”

the maybe pile

Your entire garage space cannot be a “maybe pile.” If it is, I encourage you to enlist the help of friends or a consultant such as myself. If you are unable to make a clear decision about an item such as a vacuum with a missing charging cord, put it aside until the cord is found, then store it in its appropriate zone. If the cord is still MIA after your purge, then search online for a replacement. It makes more sense to order the missing part for $12 rather than investing $120 in a new vacuum.

pick a color scheme

A consistent color scheme and storage container selection will present a calm and cohesive look to your space. I use vibrant, aqua blue storage tubs stored on gray storage racks. If something is an odd shape or color such as a Christmas tree, wrap it in black fabric to neutralize the color of the item

color versus clear totes

If looking at hundreds of items in clear bins warms your heart and does not distract your mind, then go with clear. Honestly ask yourself if you really need to see these items every single day of your life or just see those used on a weekly basis. I prefer snap-on lids versus folding lids as they are heartier and more durable when stacking. The Container Store has my favorite tote products in both white, black and with red snap closures.

7. 52

take a before picture

We often can’t see clear organizing solutions when standing in our cluttered space. An image allows you to step away from the confusion and see it thru the eye of a third party as the size, shape and complexity of our cluttered space becomes clear. For easy reference, place your “before” photos in an album on your phone using a handy free app like Dropbox. See an organizing item at the store, online or in a magazine? Take a picture of it and its barcode to help you recall its source. Pat yourself on the back as you see how much you’ve already accomplished.

In Recovery Magazine

Spring 2017

garage sale gut check

How much do you value your time, and what is the street value of your items? For me, the total value of the items I want to sell must equal at least $500 to warrant the time, energy and organization required for a successful garage sale. Total your inventory including your big ticket items such as appliances, bikes or furniture sets and the clothes and other doodads. If you decide to go ahead with a sale, reach out to friends for items to donate to your garage sale. When your organizing job is done, drive your car into your newlyuncluttered space. You’ll be astonished and energized by your garage’s fresh look.

Simplify your life! Create budget-friendly organizational systems by: maximizing any space within youryour business, home home or garage. maximizing any space within business, or garage. transitioning from stress success in recovery your recovery transitioning with success vs.to stress in your processprocess. utilizing yourown own psyche for better long-term organizational utilizing your psyche for better long-term organizational results. results. simplifying papers possessions to bring joy, not sorrow. simplifying papers andand possessions to bring joy, not sorrow. accessing ourhands-on hands-on organizing, Skype sessions or interactive Accessing our organizing, Skype sessions or interactive speaking events. speaking events.

Danielle Wurth is a professional speaker and organizer and the owner of Wurth Organizing, LLC, a company that transforms people’s lives through hands-on organizing sessions and events. In addition, Wurth is an exclusive Arizona Brand Partner of The Container Store and has been a contributor to Real Simple Magazine, Fox 10 News, Channel 3 Good Morning Arizona, 1360 KPXQ Faith Talk Radio and The Arizona Republic.

Spring 2017

THESE ORGANIZING SERVICES MAY BE A TAX-DEDUCTIBLE CONSULTING EXPENSE

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Connect with Danielle to get started!

Not a Perfect Fix by Dustin John

his article may leave you with more questions than answers. It’s impossible to explain in a single article the complexities of something as problematic as the drug war. My point is not to detail a more compassionate approach to drug use, but to use reason to illustrate why what we are currently doing is both immoral and more damaging than the drug use itself. I’m sure you’ve heard the chatter about decriminalizing casual drug use. The continuance of this prejudice-fueled debate allows the current drug laws to continue destroying innocent and braindamaged individuals every single day. There is no empirical way to classify what is or is not okay to ingest. My personal stance is that another person should not decide what other human beings put into their bodies, whether illegal drugs, chemicals or beyond. Since we own our bodies, we should have the authority to make our own choices in how we treat them, harmful or not. Sugar is harmful. It is addictive and kills individuals, but we feed it to our children by the truckload and seem to have few conscious moral qualms about doing so. On the other end of the spectrum, heroin has been deemed an evil monster to be destroyed at all costs. This imaginary distinction is irrational and anti-philosophical. We will never fix this problem using force. Many people view drugs and drug laws from idealistic or emotional standpoints. “My son died from a heroin overdose! I want all drug dealers thrown in prison for what they have done!” “We need to keep drug users out of our community by any means necessary! We cannot have drugs corrupting our children and infesting our neighborhoods with higher crime!” I can relate to this type of emotional discourse; but in reality, it does far more harm than good. If we want to win the war on drugs, we must take a rational, logical and consistent approach. With all of its guns, nuclear codes and military force, the government cannot keep drugs from entering our prisons or public schools. If we can’t keep a prison free of drugs, we surely can’t stop drugs from coming into our country and invading our towns and homes. To believe we can is to blatantly disregard the facts. So, what’s next? I think we need to ask ourselves, “Why do people do drugs?” Thanks to science, which accurately separates truth from falsehood, we can answer this question. What do the facts tell us? Earlier in this piece, I used the term “brain-damaged” because addicts are individuals who suffer from damaged self-soothing

and reward mechanisms in their brain. This could have happened in many ways, perhaps from a lack of love in childhood and the absence of early parent/child bonding, or from a mix of genes and a lack of human bonding and love. Regardless of how this damage occurs, the scientific studies on this topic are indisputable. Actual damage is done to the brain.

The evidence clearly shows that making goods or services illegal usually generates more problems by creating a grey or black market that traffics in crime and death. Creating a law will not fix the problem; it never has. The heavy-handed, no-complainantneeded approach overreaches into our personal freedom and choice.

In order to address this issue, we must follow the facts. We can debate nature vs. nurture, but it will be far more productive to look at the bigger picture instead.

If I put a “for sale” sign on an old bike and leave the bike on the edge of my lawn, and someone steals the bike, they have violated my property rights. If I place the same bike on the edge of my lawn with a sign that says “Free,” that same person is free to take the bike without breaking any law. This same principle should hold true with buying and selling drugs. It doesn’t hold true because our current laws are not tied to consistency and logic.

This brings me to my next question, “What do genetics and environment have in common?” The answer? Neither one are the individual’s fault. I am not at fault if I am born with blue eyes; it’s the result of my genes. If I am born into a family where my dirty diapers aren’t changed or my nutritional needs aren’t met, those are circumstances beyond my control. Fault, if you wish to use this term, is often environmental. We live in an era of advancements in healthcare, technology and science, but the one thing that never seems to advance is governmental policy, which is more convoluted than ever before. It took my wife five years to finally receive her green card. Five years! Is this the same government we want handling a problem as personal, fragile and life-altering as addiction? Addiction is a mental health concern, not a criminal one. When will we treat it as one? When common law was first implemented, it required a complainant for a law to be broken. The current US system enforces laws where there is no complaint. If I sell marijuana to a willing buyer, there is no violation of property rights and no unwanted harm done. It is nothing more than a free market exchange of goods and services. The vast majority of harm that arises from the buying and selling of illegal drugs is a direct result of strict drug laws. Before heroin became an illegal black market drug, it was inexpensive. Now on the black market, its price has skyrocketed. A kilo of heroin costs $2,600 to produce. That kilo is sold in the US for $130,000. Our laws have created this highly inflated profit margin. This isn’t the only problem government policies are causing. Because heroin’s price is artificially inflated, it is difficult for addicts to afford it. When heroin addicts can’t afford more dope, they steal or do whatever is necessary to get more. This creates more crime, joblessness, unemployment and full to bursting prisons funded by taxpayers. These problems are swept under the rug, and we pretend they aren’t there. Spring 2017

You may be thinking, You can’t compare buying a bicycle to buying and selling drugs! I say it doesn’t matter, and here’s why. People are going to put stuff into their bodies no matter what you and I say or do. Illegal or not, I used to shoot up heroin. Nobody could stop me. All we can do is to tell them it is not a good idea. Making laws about drug use is ineffective and ridiculous. Many drug users are simply trying to cope with the emptiness and pain they feel from early childhood trauma and/or an empty void in their being. How can we possibly think that pointing guns at them is a valid and moral solution to this problem? Strangely, we hear little about Portugal’s success on this subject. Portugal has been conducting a successful 16-year study on legalizing drugs. By every measurable metric, drug addicts are doing far better since Portugal’s decision to decriminalize drug use and possession. The statistics on HIV and other IVcontracted illnesses have plummeted. Overdose deaths have plummeted. The number of active users has plummeted. Let’s take a page out of Portugal’s book and begin helping addicts with the compassion and love they so desperately need. All the wasted funds that have been burnt up in criminal prosecutions, sting operations, prisons and fire power could have been used to rebuild people’s lives and to support sober living facilities, rehabilitation clinics and medical/needle/HIV facilities. It’s not a perfect fix, but at least we would be traveling in the right direction.

In Recovery Magazine

Dustin John resides in southern Utah and has been sober since February 1, 2012. He is the author of a highly rated addiction memoir available on Amazon entitled A Walk in His Shoes, and he continues to help in the fight against addiction. http://amzn.com/ B018WW8DIS

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The Well.indd 1

In Recovery Magazine

Spring 2017

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Spring 2017

Will Regulation Work? by Robert Apple

ately, there has been negative talk about Sober Living Homes (SLHs), concerns from people who have lived in an SLH, individuals who have had a child or loved one who are living in one, and public concern about the presence of SLHs in neighborhoods. Because of the complaints, local governments and states are considering regulations for SLHs. The majority of concerns are about the operation of SLHs: Are they a public safety concern? Are they safe? Are there benefits to SLHs? Should they be more regulated? I spent two and a half years living in a SLH, both as a client and as a manager, and I feel confident in my ability to speak to these issues. I also know firsthand how important SLHs can be to a person’s recovery. Are Sober Living Homes Safe? Yes! However, safety depends on the manager and the clients. People are concerned about clients using, overdosing and possibly dying. As an SLH manager, I did on occasion catch people using. You can’t have addicts living together without some

stages of sobriety, looking for the structure and guidance an SLH can provide. Structure, curfews, mandatory meetings, and support and guidance from the manager are some of the important assets these sober living situations provide. Opportunity is there for clients who are willing to embrace it. If they come with an attitude, “I really don’t want to be here,” they will likely not benefit much from the experience. Many clients come in with temperaments akin to feral cats. They have isolated themselves from society in order to preserve their secret lives and have become distrustful of nearly everything. In order to become healthy enough to maintain sobriety, they must learn how to socialize again. An SLH is based on developing a social environment that closely resembles a normal living situation. Clients come and go as they please, as long as they are in by curfew. Most managers don’t frisk clients every time they come into the house, so it can be easy to sneak in drugs. However, random drug testing or a room check will eventually catch someone who is using.

“Having a strong, passionate manager is key to the success of an SLH. It is a manager’s responsibility to make the clients feel safe.” issues arising. Not everyone comes in with pure intentions. Parents at the end of their rope drop off their children. Others are court-ordered or have checked in to appease someone else. Overdosing doesn’t happen often, but when it does, it gets the headlines. Was this behavior the norm? No.

Sober living is the perfect environment in which to regain essential social skills. Clients have roommates and share common areas for relaxing and entertainment. They socialize with others who are experiencing the same problems. While there is no guarantee, I believe that an SLH is the best place to begin long-term sobriety.

Having a strong, passionate manager is key to the success of an SLH. It is a manager’s responsibility to make the clients feel safe. There is no way to regulate this, but I think it should be mandatory for managers to hold weekly oneon-one meetings with each client to discover what may be troubling them. Talking about these troubles helps. Relapses should be addressed respectfully during house meetings.

Should There Be More Regulation? What should be regulated and how? Who will monitor these regulations? At what cost? These are important questions that should be asked by SLH owners and communities.

What are the Benefits of a Sober Living Home? Accountability. Most people come in to an SLH in varying

Spring 2017

Each location may have inherent issues regarding noise, parking and behavioral standards. These must be addressed with clients at check-in, along with the rules concerning cleanliness and loitering. A good manager can handle these concerns and ensure client compliance. Ongoing behavioral problems should be addressed in house meetings.

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Most SLHs could benefit from some client safety regulations and emergency response training for staff. I once had a client who overdosed on opiates and was found unresponsive. I was not trained to handle this, nor did I have the appropriate medication to administer. Fortunately, 911 personnel responded immediately and were able to revive him. How much training and of what nature should be required for SLH managers and staff? What kind of medical equipment should be kept on hand? These are important questions. I believe some basic training and knowledge is helpful when dealing with the volatility of illicit drug use, although there may be an argument for additional training in locations where emergency response time is slow. Managers should have training beyond learning about the house rules for behavior. If they are handed a list of rules for clients and their only focus is on ensuring that clients comply with these rules, they may miss the big picture â&#x20AC;&#x201C; helping clients learn to live a sober life. You can regulate

all kinds of things with good intent, but it comes down to strong leadership and willing clients to make the positive changes happen. A Comparison. I worked for a large company for many years. For part of this time, I was the job safety co-chair. When the company was in jeopardy of losing its insurance due to on-the-job accidents and injuries, we had to be regulated by the insurance company. Extensive regulations were designed especially for our company. We were frequently visited by auditors to check up on our annual safety plans, and were penalized if we were not in compliance. I tracked our progress in reducing accidents and injuries. In the ten years we were regulated, I saw moderate-to-no gains. I found this disheartening. We did make strides in procedural safety. Mandatory morning meetings where we discussed safety practices did seem to have an effect. By speaking daily with employees, we had more of an impact than the mountains of regulatory paperwork. Does regulation work? We must look at it organically.

In Recovery Magazine

Spring 2017

Communication is essential to humans, and it is the most important action to take when people are disconnected from society by addiction.

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The most important impact on an SLH is its management. If you haven’t figured out the key management positions, you are likely to over-regulate and miss the point. My Suggestions. I believe that the best way to help SLHs is through insurance companies. If insurance companies get involved with the aftercare of addicts and alcoholics, there will be more positive results. The current atmosphere of revolving-door treatment offers merely temporary results. Regulation is only part of the answer. Many addicts are untethered from society. A long-term sober environment can provide them with the connections they need. Strong, capable, passionate leadership within each SLH will provide the structure and support needed for proper functioning within the greater community.

Robert Apple is 64 years old and retired from UPS after 27 years. He has been in recovery for almost three years and has a blog about recovery, addiction and SLHs. He is also writing a fictional account about his time as the manager of an SLH.

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Cross Talk by Mollé CrossTalk is based on the premise that recovery life is polytely: frequently complex problem-solving situations characterized by the presence of not one, but several endings. This column represents decades of recovery and its application to life: how to get over it, into it or through it with spunk, levity and a good dose of reality. What? You want more than happy, joyous and free? Get over it. Just sayin’. – Mollé

Q Mollé

I am overwhelmed and having a hard time breathing. I’ve been sober for six months and am doing pretty well so far. I’m working with CPS to get my baby back. I don’t have a sponsor (I can’t handle someone telling me what to do) but I have faith in God, and a lot of sober friends with whom I’m in contact every day. I am on-the-floor after this election. I can’t sleep. I’m not focusing while at work. I can’t stand to be around people talking politics, in either direction, or in meetings. Not wanting to get out of bed is not me, but this weekend I’ve not gotten out of bed at all. I don’t want to drink, but I don’t know what to do either. – Deep in the Red Zone

Dear Blue, Can’t breathe? Be concerned. And definitely be good to yourself. These truly are intense times, and you need to nurture yourself and your recovery. This is also a time to make sure you have a sponsor in; sometimes sober friends are not enough. A sponsor can help you to stay focused on principles, priorities, and keep balanced and connected to a power that is bigger than politics, or inconsiderate people. A sponsor can teach you how to appropriately speak up in a meeting, and ask that outside issues not be discussed in the meeting. Talk or discussion of politics does NOT belong in the rooms; see AA’s Traditions Five and Ten. By the way, a sponsor’s role is not to tell you what to do, 62

but to guide you through the Steps and how to practice a sober life. Be willing to reconsider. Not everyone is available to sponsor, so don’t stop asking until you find the one. Until that time, look for someone you can help, maybe by giving a newcomer a ride to a meeting or buying them a cup of coffee after a meeting. So, there you go, you asked for my opinion. Take it or leave it.

Dear Mollé, I am struggling to help my sponsees get through post-election. I don’t know what to say because I disagree with their convictions. We’d never discussed politics before, so I did not see this coming. I listen more than I talk, but I am so uncomfortable and in complete disagreement. I am not sure I can be helpful anymore. – Trying to be Neutral in North Carolina

Dear Almost Neutral, You are not being neutral, and I’m not so sure that is what is needed. Communicating with thoughtful honesty may be

In Recovery Magazine

Spring 2017

the best way to go. It doesn’t matter what side of the fence you are on; not telling your truth is lying by omission. An honest yet difficult conversation is needed here; one that allows people to acknowledge their differences, focus on what is working in the sponsee-sponsor relationship, and let the rest go. You can kindheartedly talk about what is open for discussion and what is best to discuss with others. It is not uncommon to have differences of opinion about religion, sexual preferences or politics and to have different people to discuss them with. Focus on the similarities rather than the differences. When we act with love and kindness to others and ourselves and trust God, the rest works itself out. Even if they choose to find another sponsor, at least it will be an honest move and not one made out of unspoken frustration.

Dear Mollé, My family put me into treatment last month after a string of repeated drunken stupors, and I’m just now returning home. I saw your column and wanted to ask you a question: Can a man really get sober at 67? I am mandated to meetings and I sit there, look around and feel like everyone’s grandfather. People talk to me, thinking I’ve been sober for a long time, and then practically walk away mid-sentence when I tell them I have 60 days. I’m not sure I can do this. I’m not sure I belong here. – Old in Oklahoma

Dear Oak Tree, By the mere fact that you are reaching out to me or to anyone tells me that you want sobriety more than you may realize. I don’t imagine stupor-drinking at 67 is an easy way of life; and sobriety won’t be, either. You will have many challenges as well as periods of questioning, but you can get through it. Sobriety won’t have life-threatening consequences, nor cause you to lose your family’s respect. Ask around. Find a strong men’s AA group. You may attend have to attend groups that you don’t like, but if you persist, you will find one where you can be yourself and get the support you need to maintain sobriety. Trust the process. In today’s world, 67 is not nearly as old as it used to be. Your recovery can offer you some of the most amazing years ahead, and a renewed love for life and family. I have no need to exaggerate – AA works. It really does. Go for it.

Acceptance recovery Center

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Our goal at Acceptance Recovery Center is to help each person understand and find acceptance around their recovery, while providing them the confidence and skills for a life of sobriety.

Viewpoints shared or any implied actions suggested by Mollé are the opinions and ideas of the author only and do not represent those of In Recovery Magazine. The implied action is offered openly and is never intended to replace the advice of a healthcare professional. You may send your dilemmas to Mollé at crosstalk@inrecoverymagazine.com.

Spring 2017

In Recovery Magazine

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Gratitude is a Verb by Elizabeth Kipp

am a woman in recovery from decades of chronic pain and addiction to prescription pain and anti-anxiety medications. I spent years feeling at the mercy of physical pain and random, seemingly unprovoked, panic attacks. There were times when I felt so overwhelmed and lost in my suffering, that I actually considered – for a flicker of a moment – that I might be better off checking out of this world altogether. My connection to my Higher Power was always my saving grace. I finally entered a pain management program at a chemical dependency hospital and ultimately learned how to live a life clean and sober, healthy and free from suffering. In the Twelve Step Fellowship, I have met scores of people traveling the road to recovery from addiction, people who are in search of living a balanced, pain-free life. We work our recovery as if our lives depend upon it, because they do; some struggle with this more than others. We frequently remind each other that we must be diligent to stay one step ahead of our addiction. Addiction, and the behaviors that come with it, can be persistent and relentless in pursuit of its agenda. It fills a void that in the end has only the illusion of being filled. Some of us fall into relapse. Some of us fall even deeper into depression. Some, grabbed by our addictive tendencies, fall so deeply that we cannot find our way out of the darkness enveloping us. I hear such stories far too often. The other day, one hit very close to home. A friend of mine was so lost in her own darkness that she could no longer cope. The dreaded disease of addiction had its hooks plunged in deep. We lost this sister in recovery, this bright light who had wanted so desperately to do her part to heal our world. Her struggle was epic, possibly beyond what most of us will ever experience or understand. I was in shock when I heard the news. I connected with a few friends we had in common, and we held space for and supported one another. I was 64

so grateful to be with them. I prayed to the Infinite for my fallen sister and for her family and friends; I prayed they would find solace and peace. I awoke the next day with a heavy heart. For the first time in well over two years, I physically hurt all over. I had a hard time just getting out of bed. I pulled myself together, soaked in a hot bath of Epsom salts, then had my breakfast. I felt quite tired after that little bit of exertion. My usual habit was to dive into the day and pretty much ignore and push through my heaviness and tiredness. That morning, I made a new choice. I recognized my fatigue and honored my body. I crawled back into bed, a first in my recovery. As I lay there, I gave myself permission to be right where I was – exhausted in body, heart and soul. I put my attention on the sensations coursing through my body and let my breath carry me through it all. I was in a kind of custommade meditation. I dropped all thought and just allowed myself to “be.” This was a sacred gift to myself; perhaps it was also a sacred gift to my friend’s spirit and memory. I reflected on how I was coping with my torrent of emotion and physical sensations. I felt so very grateful for having tools and the presence of strength and mind to use them, for allowing myself to recognize the moment and experience it fully. I turned into my sadhana, a practice I usually do in the early morning hours. My sadhana clears the chakras and resets me with clarity for the new day. Because we are on a 24-hour biological clock, it makes sense to have a renewing daily practice. Though I was quite late getting started that morning, I did it anyway. Better late than never, right? In a five-minute gratitude chant, I set my intention and asked for help from the Divine to be grateful for everything I would experience in the next 24 hours. I spent this 1/24th of my day asking for help with gratitude. For me, gratitude is a verb; it as a state of being.

In Recovery Magazine

Spring 2017

That particular morning, I had a vision of my friend’s spirit, now free from all earthly bonds. I saw her spirit, which had tried so hard to fit into this world; I saw how hard she had tried to pass her gifts along to others, until it had become too much. I quietly asked her spirit and myself, “How can I be grateful for losing you from this realm in such a sudden and unnatural way?” The answer came quickly. “Hold fast, deeply, and strong to your own recovery. Use the tools with which you have been so generously blessed and pass them forward if and when you can and are asked to do so.” I arose from my sadhana with a lighter spirit and with an even greater determination to get my own recovery right and do my level best to keep it on track. I stepped into the rest of my day, stopping first to journal these few notes. I made a promise to myself, to my sisters and brothers in recovery and to all the rest of my friends and family. I promised to bring courage to the moment, feel all that comes up as my life unfolds, and allow myself to just be without reservation in every moment.

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Yes, gratitude is a verb. Elizabeth Kipp is a health facilitator, specializing in stress management, Emotional Freedom Techniques/tapping, ancestral clearing and Kundalini Yoga. She is a patient advocate in service to the alarmingly high population of people who suffer from stress and chronic pain. She uses her grounding in science, her foundation in the spiritual world, and a lifetime of experience to help people unleash their inherent power to heal. https://www.elizabeth-kipp.com

Spring 2017

Desert Hot Springs, CA 1 (800) 974-1938 bellamonterecovery.com

In Recovery Magazine

The

Façade I

by Sarah Allen Benton, MS, LMHC, LPC

was raised in New Bedford, Massachusetts, an urban working-class seaport with boundless character. My mother was a music teacher; my father was a lawyer; and I was an only child who received more than enough unconditional love, attention and support for all I chose to pursue. At times, I wished my parents had focused less on me, as they were overprotective and strict, and I was fiercely independent.

My transition from a small private school to the state’s largest high school with a freshman class of a thousand students was both overwhelming and exhilarating. I thrived in the diverse culture, social life, academics and extra-curricular activities: field hockey tri-captain, track, tennis, drama club, debate team and more. My high school friendships were based on loyalty, protection and making memories together. I have maintained many of those friendships to this day. I was proud to have graduated from high school with honors, and was more than ready to transition to college. I had “strict” criteria for choosing which college to attend. It had to be far away from home, possess an active sorority and fraternity culture, and a have beautiful campus. I found these qualities at the University of Colorado at Boulder. I still remember the day I arrived, my euphoria about the journey ahead and the sense of freedom! I quickly acclimated, joined a sorority and excelled academically. Four years passed quickly, and life felt like an ongoing celebration with anticipation of the next compelling adventure. Following graduation, I moved with my best friends from college to Manhattan Beach, California. Surrounded by palm trees, ocean and sunshine, I felt I had arrived in heaven. I was hired for a producing job with great potential at the Disney Channel and was living out my dream of working in the television production industry. After two years, however, I began to miss my East Coast roots, grew disillusioned with corporate America and decided to move to Nantucket Island to “find myself.” I settled in Boston with a group of friends where I remained for the next 13 years. I craved a meaningful career, so I earned a master of science degree in counseling psychology from Northeastern University. My name is Sarah, and I am an alcoholic. When you read this abbreviated version of my life story, it appears I had a successful, satisfying and privileged existence – and I did. However, I was an active alcoholic for twelve years, subconsciously hiding behind my external accomplishments, friendships and outward appearance. My loved ones and I struggled to see the severity of my situation. I did not have the obvious external losses and red flags that society often views as prerequisites for addiction. I was a binge drinker who blacked out, experiencing complete memory loss for multiple hours when overly intoxicated. I would drink large quantities of hard liquor 2-3 nights a week, but I never allowed it to interfere with my academic or professional commitments. Even with this façade of control, my behavior when intoxicated was dangerous, provocative and the antithesis of my true self. I assumed that everyone who drank too much alcohol would black out; a part of me enjoyed the complete escape and was not scared by this consequence of my drinking. As long as I had my vice, my high and my rebellion, I was willing to conform to the societal norms of attending school and working. Ordinary life wasn’t exciting enough, and alcohol was my pacifier. I had assumed I would binge drink for awhile and then magically “phase out” once I became an adult. However, after celebrating my 23rd birthday with my usual blur of memories of just half of the night, I realized that for some reason I was not outgrowing my drinking patterns. As a gift to myself, I swore off alcohol for six months. Much to the surprise of those around me, I succeeded. 66

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Spring 2017

Thus began my four-year, cyclical odyssey of trying to control my drinking and turn myself into a “normal” drinker, which included drinking water in between drinks, drinking alcohol I did not like, exercising before drinking, meditating before drinking (the ultimate oxymoron), seeing a moderation management therapist and beyond. In four years, nothing changed. As an intelligent person who could accomplish most goals I had set for myself, I had met my match. By the age of 27, I was tired of being “that drunk girl” at the party, and my emptiness and shame began to reach a crescendo. I realized that the life I wanted was not possible with alcohol in it, but I could not imagine my life without it. While the conclusion seems obvious, the battle within the mind of an alcoholic is powerful. Because I was a highfunctioning individual, I was unable to see myself as the “A” word. Friends would say, “You’re not like those people.” Yet no matter how I tried to disguise or dress up my alcoholism, I was beginning to realize that I was one of those people. I was no different than the homeless person on the street or someone in prison for alcohol-related offenses.

my struggle. I wrote the book I had needed while fumbling my way through early sobriety. Recovery from an addiction involves a lifestyle change, finding social support, self-care, new coping skills, attending mutual-help meetings, addressing underlying mental health issues and more. I did not receive immediate rewards for getting sober; in fact, I felt worse before I felt better, both physically and psychologically. Today, I have fully accepted that I am an alcoholic. I know at times my mind may tell me that drinking is a good idea, but the reality is I cannot have the life I have today with alcohol in the picture. As a result of my complicated journey, I have learned that being an alcoholic and achieving external success are not mutually exclusive, the disease of alcoholism does exact a price. I am so grateful to the friends and family who have supported me along this path and for the ongoing opportunities to help others heal in their recovery journey. As a therapist who specializes in addiction treatment, I am clear about why I need to keep fighting the battle. I am not just fighting for me, but for those I can help now and in the future.

I have kept a journal since the age of eleven, and I am grateful for all that I recorded about my battle with alcoholism because it provided the concrete evidence I needed to combat the thought distortions created by this disease. I was blessed to have the opportunity to write a book about high-functioning alcoholics and to include some of these journal entries as a way for others to relate to

Sarah Allen Benton is author of Understanding the High-Functioning Alcoholic and co-owner of Benton Behavioral Health Consulting, LLC. She is currently the Director of Clinical Services at Aware Recovery Care home-based addiction treatment in North Haven, Connecticut, and a clinical consultant for The Strathmore House transitional sober living for men in Boston, Massachusetts. www.highfunctioningalcoholic.com

“My practice is now able to prescribe healthy alternative medications to recovery patients on-site. Americeuticals offers a convenient, streamlined approval technology and we participate in the prescription revenue”. I was able to get off the harmful narcotics by using one of these alternatives which are just as effective. I feel so much better and I was able to kick my addiction.

Spring 2017

In Recovery Magazine

In Recovery Magazine’s Third Annual Gratitude Gala

ou never know who will show up at an In Recovery Magazine (IRM) Gratitude Gala! We expect addiction industry standouts, but guests were taken by surprise by this year’s master of ceremonies. She first mingled with guests at the pre-dinner reception, where she invited several attendees to appear on her TV show. Then she took center stage for the Gala’s evening program. Dawn Lutrell, an Ellen DeGeneris impersonator, had us all fooled. Even after we realized she really wasn’t Ellen, she kept us in stitches with her brilliant writing and delivery. We soon forgot she was Dawn, as we roared with laughter to her Ellen-inspired comedy. Yes, it was a great evening, but it didn’t end with our MC.

IRM awards followed the first course, as Publisher Kim Welsh handed out this year’s awards to recovery notables. Awardees treated the audience with stirring acceptance speeches, reminding us all of why we do what we do. Our Youth Advocate Award went to Jodi Barber, a fierce advocate for today’s youth from Orange County, California. After the overdose death of her son, Jarrod, she recognized that accidental death from overdosing had become an epidemic not just in her suburban community, but across America. Taking action to save lives, she and another mom produced a short documentary, Overtaken, to educate young adults on the truth about addiction and the potentially deadly consequences of drug use.

In Recovery Magazine

Spring 2017

Leonard Buschel of Writers In Treatment received the Link Award for his program linking treatment scholarships to individuals in the writing and publishing industries with problems related to drugs, alcohol, gambling or other self-destructive behaviors. Scholarships are funded with money raised by the Writers In Treatment’s REEL Recovery Film Festival, which is generously supported by numerous addiction treatment facilities around the country. The Making a Difference Award went to John Shinholser and Carol McDaid, founders of the McShin Foundation, Virginia’s leading nonprofit, full service recovery community organization, which is committed to serving individuals and families in their fight against substance use disorders. They spread the word of recovery and educate families, communities, and government regarding SUDs, as well as reduce the stigma attached to them.

The IRM Publisher’s Award for outstanding achievements in recovery went to Barbara Brown, Art of Recovery Expo. In 2005, Barbara Brown and her late husband, Bill Brown, launched the Art of Recovery Expo in Phoenix, Arizona, to provide a judgment-free venue where individuals, friends and families could easily find the resources they needed to begin a full life of healing and recovery.

This year’s Editor’s Choice Award for writing went to Dr. George Baxter-Holder, author of Drugs, Food, Sex and God, for his poignant article, “The Weeds of Unworthiness,” published in the 2016 winter edition of In Recovery Magazine. An accomplished writer, Dr. George is affectionately known to be a kind, compassionate champion of recovery. Adriana Marchione was recognized as our Artist of the Year for “The Creative High,” a documentary feature film in production about artists who have faced addiction, how they create, and how they found recovery. Adriana has been involved in the arts for over 25 years. She is a leader in her work as expressive arts educator and somatic movement therapist, and is a popular educator influenced by her position as core faculty member of the Tamalpa Institute. She has been in recovery from alcoholism for 23 years.

Spring 2017

In Recovery Magazine

Our Star Attraction

lonzo Bodden’s performance topped off the evening. This actor, writer and comedian won season three of The Last Comic Standing and was a runner-up in the second season – and now we know why. Already a familiar voice on NPR’s Wait, Wait, Don’t Tell Me, Alonzo proved to be a hilarious voice of recovery. He didn’t come from a broken home, nor was there a background of addiction in his family. At an early age in Queens, New York, he frequently saw others smoking weed and drinking beer. By the 80s, he was on his own in Los Angeles, and there it seemed everyone was using cocaine. He decided to follow suit and began drinking and using cocaine, which eventually led him to using crack. He hit bottom quickly and went into a second round of treatment in March 1988. He has been in recovery ever since. Until he got sober and met recovering people in the entertainment industry who loved what they did for a living, he had no idea he was funny enough to pursue a career in comedy. After first appearing at the Montreal Just for Laughs Comedy Festival, his illustrious career has included appearances on Conan and Leno’s Tonight Show, acting roles in Scary Movie 4 and Bringing Down the House, and serving as host on 101 Cars You Must Drive and America’s Worst Driver.

In Recovery Magazine

Spring 2017

Familiar faces this year like: Special guest appearances by singer/songwriter Elizabeth Edwards and Danny Murphy of StopB4UStart

Shown from left to right - Melissa Thornburg (Prescott House); Sue Shipman (Optimum Balance); Rick and Jolene Baney (Premier Recovery Options); Jacque Miller (IRM) and Leilonne Neylon (The Haven); Dr. Rex Smyly (Pronghorn Psychiatric) and Bud Culwell (Budâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s House)

IRM columnist, Mike Lyding; Kevin Brigham (Decision Point) and his lovely wife Lois; Peter Thomas (Chapter 5); Jay Stinnet (Mago Retreat); Kamiko Miller (Balboa Horizons); Damien Browning (Steps to Recovery Homes)

IRM Photographer, Lars Prandelli, had some fun with our guests, Josh (A Soberway) and Helen Pegram (Billing Solutions).

Some guests had fun with Lars, Alex Hermosillo, RN, and Tony Rinello (Pronghorn Psychiachtric). Attendees not shown: Calvary Healing Center, Steered Straight, Camelback Recovery, The Pathway Program, PCS, Americas Rehab Campuses, KIPU Systems, Core Recovery, Spero House, Destiny Sober Living, Triple Point Recovery, Archways Recovery Center, Lakeview Health, Springboard Recovery, Turning Point, Serenity Place Prescott, Sierra Tucson, Las Vegas Recovery, Abundant Thoughts, Recovery Consultants, Rivermend and Gallus Detox.

Spring 2017

In Recovery Magazine

Dawn Lutrell,

Comedienne Extraordinaire

’m a comedienne. It’s what I do. The opportunity to spread a little joy, entertain, and offer people some laughter is truly what I love to do and is the gift I most humbly and gratefully offer up as I travel the road set before me. I am fairly certain that looking like Ellen was just a random coincidence or an odd joke from the Universe rather than part of any plan for me. We all know that God has an incredible sense of humor. Ellen DeGeneres must also feel the same having folks tell her she looks like me. Hosting the IRM Gratitude Gala this year was not an opportunity. It was a gift. After losing my sister, 21 years sober, to a relapse and her subsequent suicide in 2009, going to Phoenix, Arizona, her home, was a daunting proposition. My fear of facing unresolved “what ifs” and “if only” made me want to say no, but recovery has taught me to say yes. I met so many incredible people at the Gala, many new friends and many warriors in the trenches. It is only through their courage in offering such vulnerability and truth that I was able to step into my own and share where addiction had taken me, and also my sister to her last breath on this earth a mere eight minutes’ drive from where I stood. Thank you for so generously sharing yourselves with me. I am better simply having met each and every one of you. I have never felt more humbled and more able to truly honor my sister’s sobriety, as well as how hers forever changed mine. To all of those in attendance, to all at In Recovery Magazine, and to my mentor and friend, Suzanne English Franz, who was present the night of February 10, 2011, when I came into the treatment center and who provided this connection in recovery, thank you! I will gratefully carry this experience close always. Most importantly, I’m thankful for the willingness to be willing in all things recovery as exhibited by all of you trudging this Road of Happy Destiny, and that ever-present voice that always reminds me: “Don’t give up before the miracle happens!”

Can you guess who’s who?

In Recovery Magazine

Spring 2017

Toxic No More by Ginger Sacco You were the first thing after work; you were with me as I met the clerk. You were cold, not too sweet, on my lips, passing my teeth. You were my daily therapy, until you became my enemy. My life revolved around you, like water around a canoe. You restricted my life’s process. I was not able to handle its stresses. You were my ball and chain early in my youth in Maine. I wished only for happiness, just to discover loneliness. Until that September day when God guided me to AA. Broken, scared, sick, and tired, the Fellowship left me inspired. Hearing words of Dr. Bob and Bill was like finding a treasure at Goodwill. Though the desire was slowly removed, the life I had still didn’t improve. Until I discovered the miracle, which at first I thought was delusional. Until the tenth of September, a date I will always remember. Baggage of my alcoholic past took a drastic turn – fast. Prayer made me a believer. My life had become simpler. I am just allergic, and no longer toxic. I am now a grateful recovering alcoholic.

Ginger Sacco is a disabled veteran and a grateful member of AA, who has experienced the Step Nine Promises based on working the Twelve Steps. She hit bottom when she had to admit her autistic son into residential facility. Shortly thereafter she was served divorce papers and was juggling three kids with medical issues. Just before the divorce was finalized, she and her husband reconciled.

Spring 2017

In Recovery Magazine

Feel Your Best: Spring Cleaning by Laura O’Reilly

Spring is a time of hope, change and new beginnings. It’s a time for letting go of the old while creating room for the new; an optimal time for cleansing, detoxification and trying new things. Here are two easy habits to detoxify, improve your health and start each day clean and serene. Did you know your tongue is one of the body’s great detoxifiers? Overnight as you rest, bacteria and toxins build up upon the tongue’s surface. It’s a good idea to remove these impurities in the morning when you wake up to avoid ingesting them. In a downward motion, use a spoon to scrape the white film from the surface of your tongue several times until it wipes clean. This removes bacteria, food debris, toxins and dead cells. It prevents the reabsorption of toxins and improves your oral health, breath and tasting ability. It activates saliva production and promotes your digestive fire, improving digestion and immunity. Tongue scrapers may be purchased at a local health store; however, a spoon works just fine. Upon waking, your body is dehydrated. To begin your day on the right foot, enjoy a good-sized glass of water after cleaning your tongue and brushing your teeth or try adding a squeeze of lemon to warm water to fire up your metabolism. Life can be busy and sometimes we are so caught up in our to-do lists that we forget to hydrate. Drinking ample water helps the kidneys flush out toxins, and because brain tissue is 75% water, water prevents fatigue or foggy-headedness. Additionally, we eat less when we are well hydrated; this gives our digestive system a rest and helps us maintain a healthy body weight. Hydration is good for our complexion and helps prevent sprains and cramps as it lubricates muscles and joints. It also helps the excretory process as fiber needs water to bulk up and move through our digestive tract. Have trouble getting your daily dose of H2O? Carry a permanent water bottle or keep an extra in the car, at the office or in your bag. Try these suggestions out and see how you feel. If you miss a day, don’t worry. You can try again tomorrow. Don’t forget, when we practice new healthy habits, it’s important to give ourselves positive reinforcement. Congratulate yourself for trying something new, and recognize your progress. You deserve to feel your best!

4 Laura O’Reilly is a Jamasian (Jamaican-Chinese) yogi living in Okanagan, British Columbia, Canada. She is the founder of Potentialize Me Yoga, specializing in yoga for recovering addicts. After becoming sober, she left the corporate world to follow her heart and found her passion in teaching yoga. Yoga has been a wonderful tool for Laura’s own healing, growth and personal development, which drives her desire to make it accessible for everyone. Her daily practices are rooted in spirituality, a desire to serve and the belief that everything happens for a reason. potentializemeyoga.com

In Recovery Magazine

Spring 2017

Make Plans to Write for us in 2017! Calling all domestic violence shelters. We know you have stories to tell. Fetal alcohol syndrome is a hidden epidemic in the drug and alcohol addiction world. There are increasing numbers of homeless women and children. Please share your personal stories or professional expertise with us. Please send us your 900- to 1,200-word narrative. Deadline: May 1, 2017 Does your program work from a harm reduction point of view? Is it successful? Did you receive treatment in a harm reduction setting? Tell us your story. Equine therapy is helping thousands to recover. Share your experience with the use of therapeutic animals in addiction and mental illness recovery. Please send us your 900- to 1,200-word narrative. Deadline: August 1, 2017 Spring 2018 – Recovery Treatment Models; Upcoming 2018 Events. What are some different models of recovery treatment available these days? Twelve Step programs abound, but what about St. Jude’s NY, SMART Recovery, Celebrate Recovery, the Promises and holistic models? We’d also like to highlight notable 2018 events. Please send us your 900- to 1,200-word narrative. Deadline: November 1, 2017

Send your ideas to editor@inrecoverymagazine.com Spring 2017

In Recovery Magazine

Recovering Artist

by Manny Mendez

ello, my name is Manny, and this is my story. I was a full-blown drug addict by the age of 13 and spent most of my juvenile years in institutions. When I turned 18, I was sentenced to prison and spent the next eleven years at what I jokingly now refer to as the best art school in the world. It was there that art became my best friend and where I developed this God-given gift. When I was released in 2000, I had great intentions, but no action behind them. Somewhere along the way, I got lost again and continued to make a mess of my life. I made many attempts at recovery, but never seriously took the suggestions I was given. I continued the vicious cycle of jails, rehabs and detox centers. It was only during those times that I would pick up my art again. I would only draw or paint when I was in an institution; in those moments I found some sort of peace. On January 16, 2012, I knew I had been beaten, and I finally surrendered. I told myself I would do whatever it took. I would wire my mind to do the opposite; for once in my life, I would start drawing and painting outside of an institution. I began to find peace and a connection to God, my mind cleared, my spirit grew and I felt closer to

God than ever before. At times, I was amazed that I could actually create a beautiful piece of art. Going to meetings regularly and working the Steps, I began to feel some hope for myself. I didn’t have much; I did my art in my mom’s garage, and I slept on her sofa for 18 months. I had no car, no valid identification and no checking account; yet I was okay. I was finding myself, and that meant everything. As part of my recovery service work, I began donating my art to conventions. I’ll never forget the first piece I donated entitled “Never Alone.” I was asked to share my thoughts on it in front of 300 people. Prior to this, I never even raised my hand at a meeting. It was then that I experienced my spiritual awakening, and God revealed to me His will for my life. I couldn’t have designed the life I live today. God placed into my life some folks who carried me and loved me until I learned how to love myself. Four years and nine months later, first and foremost, I am now able to be a father to my beautiful daughter. My art pushed me to creatively pursue things that

In Recovery Magazine

Spring 2017

Advertising Index Acceptance Recovery Center............................................ 63 Americeuticals.................................................................... 67 Arizona Office of Problem Gambling.............................. 57 Bella Monte Recovery........................................................ 65 Billing Solutions........................................ inside back cover Camelback Recovery.......................................................... 56 Compass Recovery............................................................. 09 Desert Star Addiction Recovery Center.......................... 03 Get Real Recovery................................................back cover Hepburn Capital................................................................. 56 Heroes & Horses................................................................. 61 Iris Healing Retreat................................. inside front cover

seemed impossible by human standards. I’ve gone on to produce five inspirational documentaries, which were nominated to numerous film festivals, including an international one. My art work is in schools and meeting halls, and I’ve designed convention logos.

KIPU Systems..................................................................... 01

Today, I work in the treatment field. My advice for anyone struggling with substance abuse is to never give up. Make sure your dreams are bigger than your fears. Recovery is the only place in this world where you can arrive broken and hopeless, with no education and a criminal background, and still make a life beyond your wildest dreams.

RECO Intensive.................................................................. 05

I hope my story speaks to you. If you wish to watch my films, they can be found on YouTube under Foreel Inspirational Documentaries. Our latest film is entitled “The Art of Recovery.” The film is now an annual art exhibit hosted in South Florida. Thank you for giving me this opportunity to share my art and my story. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DMqJ-JFqk5E

Spring 2017

In Recovery Magazine

Lakeview Health................................................................. 47 My 12 Step Store................................................................. 29 Prescott House for Men..................................................... 57 The Sanctuary..................................................................6&7 Serene Scene Magazine...................................................... 31 Serenity Place...................................................................... 33 Starving Artists................................................................... 78 Step 12 Magazine................................................................ 35 Teen Challenge of Tucson................................................. 65 The Well Recovery Center................................................. 56 WCSAD............................................................................... 41 Wurth Organizing.............................................................. 53

The Starving Artists Deana Liles

928.710.6739 deanaliles1@hotmail.com

My name is Deana Rae Liles, I was born in 1975 to Jesse and Gayla Liles in Farmington, New Mexico. My family frequently moved when I was young, eventually moving to Prescott, Arizona, in 2001. As a young child, I naturally loved bright colors, and by the age of three or four I was given my first art set. As a teenager, I didn’t think I was very proficient or good at art so sadly, I quit doing it. It wasn’t until 2001 that I again began to have an interest in creating something. I saw some art work an ex-boyfriend had made from a kit. I remember carefully studying his work and wondering if I could make something similar of my own. I bought all the materials I thought I would need to make my first bead-woven tapestry and completed using trial and error. I have been making them ever since.

Anne Shad 928.713.9101 anneshad@gmail.com

Here’s an inexpensive way to showcase your work and reach thousands. Call In Recovery Magazine to find out how 928.533.7032 78

In Recovery Magazine

Spring 2017

Once Fooled by Emily Capps

Lost. Fooled by a touch. Creativity, passion, desire â&#x20AC;&#x201C; lost. Where am I? Who am I? Names of all types define me. Continuing on with insanity, surpassing all signs, ignoring all warnings. A moment of awakening. Ah! Now is the time for renewal, for redefinition, for change. Night comes. Blanket of darkness covers all wisdom, all logic, all truth. Once again, seeking a name. Who am I? You walk on streets of broken glass; I follow. You believe beauty is art; I become a canvas. You seek love in the unknown; I evoke mystery. I am a garden of brokenness. Seeds are planted, yet no growth. Spring comes; flowers bud, yet soon wither. A rose now, an aspen tree I soon aspire. Freedom forever. By sunrise I am Tanzanite and Black Opal; Diamond is my name at dusk. How can I keep jumping from here to there? Chaos and havoc are my fuel, setting ablaze a divine and holy ball of clay once meant for molding â&#x20AC;&#x201C; a masterpiece prematurely burned. Thank God! By sanctification, fire makes all things new! Then clay, now hands and feet; I walk where my once darkness now shines light, a light brighter than the midday sun.

Emily Capps is a resident of Tuscaloosa, Alabama and is on the path to becoming a marriage and family therapist. She holds a BA in psychology concentrating in addiction and recovery from the University of Alabama. She hopes to inspire young men and women trapped in sex and love addiction and let them know they are not alone and there is a solution. lovejoyandpeace15@gmail.com

Spring 2017

In Recovery Magazine

Recovery Today

“Recovery Today” shares our favorite tips and humor for people traipsing the Road of Happy Destiny.

Heard at a Meeting

Remember to read the black part of the book. Practice, practice, practice – makes progress. Don’t let perfect get in the way of good. When all else fails, follow directions. Said to a newcomer: “Not to worry, we’ve assembled a panel of experts.” Be careful what you tell yourself because you’re going to believe it.

Be careful what you tell yourself because you’re going to believe it.

fter working my last overnight shift, I was running on no sleep. I decided to be productive, thinking maybe, just maybe, if I cleaned my room I might also clean up a little bit of the mess I’ve made in my head. I vacuumed every last bit of square footage in my room, scrubbed the bathroom from floor to ceiling, threw the dirty clothes that had been sitting on my floor for weeks into the wash, and dusted everything in sight. When I finished, I thought maybe I should take my dogs for a walk – the very same dogs I’ve avoided walking for weeks because I decided that sleeping until noon better suited me. Off I went, me, my 23-year-old self, taking my dogs for a walk before nine in the morning. If miracles happen, this sure was one heck of a miracle. I took the dogs on a path through the woods not far from my house, the very same path my sister had shown me late one afternoon just a week before, but that I hadn’t been able to fully enjoy at the time. As my dogs and I came to a fork in the path, I decided to take a right. This path led up a hill and into a field of tall, colorless grass and weeds. I walked up the hill, every thought that had been bothering me bombarding my mind. I felt as if I were beginning to unravel at the seams. Every emotion I’d been avoiding hit me like a wave crashing onto the shore. I collapsed to the ground and refused to fight it anymore. With one hand held to my forehead and the other hand on

the two leashes, I broke down. There I was at the top of that hill with my two dogs, crying and letting out everything I’d been holding in for so long. I was truly letting myself feel and giving myself a freakin’ break. In the midst of my breakdown, I opened my eyes to see my two dogs looking at me with what seemed to be smiles on their tiny faces. I stopped crying and started laughing. I wiped the tears from my face and looked around. Here I was, surrounded by Mother Nature – no humans, no technology – just a girl, her dogs and some good old-fashioned earth. In that moment, I knew I was okay. I had simply forgotten to keep it simple. I had gone for weeks worrying about things like relationships, money, jobs, education and sobriety. While all of those things are important, they do not define who I am as a person. I had let the stresses of life consume me to the point where I began losing myself, yet again. Today, by the grace of God, I have found my way back to keeping it simple. Regardless of what happens in life, the twists and turns that may be thrown my way, I am okay because today I am alive. What a beautiful thing it is to be truly alive. h

Jenny Humes was born in New York, got sober in Arizona and now lives in Massachusetts, where she is singing her way through life, one day at a time. https://www.instagram.com jennyyjoann/ 80

In Recovery Magazine

Spring 2017