CNY Woman Online Nov/Dec Edition 2020 by Rochester Woman Online

SHE HUSTLES TALKS

WOMEN ENTREPRENEURS

Featuring: - SAVON SPEAKS

- A MOTHER’S WORDS: LAURIE MCNIGHT - TEARNEY’S KARATE - THE KEFI WAY - SEXUALLY SPEAKING: THE GIFT OF SELF PLEASURE -ENERGY RESET - SO MUCH MORE!

Enjoy

LOCAL JEWELRY & FASHION DESIGNER: MICHELLE DARIN

QUEEN OF ARTS - MUSICIAN & MORE AMANDA ASHLEY

Dr. Pam Denton FROM SEEKER TO SUPERHERO

COVER STORY 16

DR. PAM DENTON: FROM SEEKER TO SUPERHERO

nov/dec

{ TABLE OF CONTENTS }

34 62

126

c edition { TABLE OF CONTENTS }

REGULARS

REGULARS 194

COACHING WITH KRISTIN B

212

TAMMY’S TIDBITS

256

SEEING INTO THE FUTURE

WOMEN WHO INSPIRE Kim Allen

QUEEN OF ARTS Amanda Ashley

ALL ACCESS

UNSTOPPABLE WOMAN

DISHING WITH THE DIVA’S The Delavan Hotel & Spa

100

VOICES FOR IMPACT

236

KARMA SPEAKS

190

TIME FOR YOU

264

TRACY TALKS

196

IN HER OWN WORDS Laurie Mcnight

208

ANIMAL CARE SANCTUARY 240

216

FINANCIALLY SPEAKING

274

LETS MEET Freddie Robinson

268

107

SPECIAL FEATURES 107

SHE HUSTLES TALKS Michelle DaRin The Beauty Room Talena Skye Tearney’s Karate Not Blended Jokele Beauty Kefi Marketing BeautifyMe Mary Alice Enright

FASHION & BEAUTY 224

CORNER

BEAUTY TIPS BY MICHELLE

100

KURVY KORNER

HEALTH & WELLNESS 230

SEXUALLY SPEAKING

PARTNERS IN A JOURNEY

250

WELL TRAIL

242

B. MOR

276

MENTALLY THINKING

204

TEEN TALK

220

SCALP NY MIND, BODY & SPIRIT

180

226

SAVON SPEAKS

308

TRAVEL WITH AGNESS

268

{ FROM THE PUBLISHER }

“The only time your should ever look back is to see how far you have come.”

rom seer to superhero, Central NY Woman Online is really excited to bring you our latest cover woman, Dr. Pam Denton!

Dr. Pam Denton has dedicated her life to helping women explore, heal, prosper, strengthen, and, ultimately, find their inner superhero. I personally think she is a “superwoman” and we are honored to not only have her tell her story this month, but have some really exciting things planned for partnering in the future! This woman is the true definition of empowerment! Read all about her story starting on page [16]. Plus, we have our incredible ALL NEW She Hustles Talks women entrepreneurs special section featuring some of Central NY’s amazing women who are truly hustling in their business and lives now more then ever. Read their amazing stories starting on page [107] with our SHT cover woman, local fashion and jewelry designer (and so much more), Michelle DaRin.

T T

ON OUR COVER

On the cover of our November/December Edition of Central NY Woman Online we have our resident “superhero”, Dr. Pam Denton photographed at the studios of Katrina Grady of KL Storyography.

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

We all want to wish everyone a very happy and safe holiday season and lets hope for an amazing New Year. Stay tuned, because we will be launching some amazing new products, services and more in 2021!

CONNECTING WITH SPIRITS MESSAGES & LOVE

Holidays are often a very challenging time when we miss our loved ones who have passed on. Their physical presence is always missed. Their Spirit always brings healing energy, love & comfort. Join me for a special virtual event December 12th, as we join in mind, heart & Spirit. SPECIAL GIFT CERTIFICATES AVAILABLE

HTTPS://BIT.LY/35HTHY3

{ A LOOK AT OUR TEAM }

PUBLISHER EDITOR - IN- CHIEF CREATIVE DIRECTOR/GRAPHIC DESIGN PHOTOGRAPHY

CONTRIBUTING WRITERS

Kelly Breuer Shanelle Benson Reid Kelly Breuer KT Storyography Cindy Bell Michal Lepore Brody Wheeler Jeff Gerew Hillary Welles Michelle Dibernardo Shanelle Benson Reid Kelli LaPage Dr. Pam Denton Alana Cahoon Tammy Vreeland Tracy Simone Kristin Bauer-Gross Sonia Conlin Angela McGhee Savon Holt Bonnie Floyd Beth Parry Kristin Bauer Gross Jarrod Schoomaker Ellen Feldman Gabby Koenig Jennafer Pascarella Shannon Fleming Bre Morris Kelli LaPage Kim Allen

ADVERTISING SALES

Kelly Breuer

SOCIAL MEDIA DIRECTOR

Toni Natalie

WEB DESIGN & MANAGEMENT

Gabriella Rose Fiederlein Denise Clifford Olga Monicell Katina Karl Talena Skye Matika Goldsmith Patrice Edwards Alexis Kuhl Laurin McNight

Network Rochester

Rochester Woman ONLINE is the premier professional woman’s online publication in the greater Rochester area. Our feature articles address major topics that interest local women. Each issue includes articles on health, fashion, fitness, finance, dining, lifestyle and personal perspectives, as well as a spotlight on local area women. The electronic magazines are distributed freely through your favorite app store and will be in your inbox electronically by the first week of every month. The publication is available free of charge. Please feel free to contact publisher Kelly Breuer at 585.727.9120 or you can email us at networkrocqueen@gmail.com. Download our current media kit at www. rochesterwomanonline.com. The magazine is published 12 times a year by Rochester Woman ONLINE. Copyright © 2017 Rochester Woman ONLINE. No part of this magazine may be reproduced or republished without the consent of the publisher. Rochester Woman ONLINE is not responsible for unsolicited submissions, manuscripts, photos or artwork. All such submissions become the property of Rochester Woman ONLINE and will not be returned.

{ FOR A GOOD CAUSE { { SHIFT+CONTROL COVER STORY }} }

YOU ARE ENOUGH. DR. PAM DENTON BY NICOLE HEROUX WILLIAMS I PHOTOS BY NSP STUDIO BY HILLARY WELLES I PHOTOS BY KL STORYOGRAPHY & CINDY BELL

FROM SEEKER TO SUPERHERO Dr. Pam Denton has dedicated her life to helping women explore, heal, prosper, strengthen, and, ultimately, find their inner superhero. Her path began to reveal itself during her senior year in college when she started getting sick constantly. Feeling terrible physically and mentally, she found it harder and harder to get out of bed. She knew something was wrong at a deep level - but what? She sought medical help and was disappointed when the doctors focused only on her symptoms without digging deeper to find the possible source of her exhaustion and illness. Finally, when she was once again at the doctor’s office being offered a prescription for antibiotics, she had a powerful flash of insight. “I’m not sick,” she thought. “There is something wrong with me that can’t be fixed with antibiotics.” In that moment, she knew she was depressed and also that she didn’t want to follow traditional Western approaches for medicating or treating depression. She walked out of the doctor’s office and vowed to start down a new path. On that life-changing day, Pam made a conscious choice to believe in her body’s ability to heal itself. She knew that her body’s innate intelligence was super-powerful and that, given the right 16

tools, she could be her own superhero and bring herself back to balance and health. At the same time, she witnessed her college friends going off to interview for corporate jobs. This followed the path that Pam had been taught growing up:

trusting her intuition to lead her toward her authentic life purpose. SUPERHERO TIP #1: You can do it your way! Pay attention to the signals your body gives you. What gives you pleasure and satisfaction? What energizes and excites you? Let yourself be motivated by what lights your inner fire, not by what others tell you is right for you. Stop listening to the mandates of others and listen to your internal mandates! To get in touch with your inner fire and listen to your inner mandates, join Dr. Pam for her FREE semi-weekly BreatheFit Upgrades! https://supercorefit. com/fitness-classes

“Go to college and then get a good job.” But just as she knew that traditional medicine was not for her, she knew she could not follow the traditional corporate path after college. Instead, she took a leap into the unknown, taking time to explore her passions and

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

Over the next few years, Pam undertook a conscious and rigorous course of self-exploration and selfhealing. To heal her depression, she began breathwork, journaling, practicing yoga, meditating, and going to a chiropractor for network spinal analysis. She returned to teaching fitness and became the fitness director at the local YMCA in order to take care of her body and help people as she had in high school, when she had been a lifeguard and fitness instructor. During the course of her soul searching, she found the answer to overcoming depression and finding her passion: being true to herself. “I couldn’t go the traditional route that so many of my friends and family took,” Pam says decisively. “I knew it absolutely. If I tried

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

“You can do it your way! Pay attention to the signals your body gives you”

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

COVER STORY } } { {SHIFT+CONTROL “She knew that her body’s innate intelligence was super-powerful and that, given the right tools, she could be her own superhero and bring herself back to balance and health”

to fit myself into that box, it would be devastating for me.” Pam’s authentic purpose emerged over several years of dedication to her search. In discovering her body’s innate healing capabilities, it became clear to her that she was here to be a superhero in her own life – and in others’ lives as well. She wanted to save people’s lives as she was learning to save her own. Just as she had been a lifeguard so she could save people from drowning, she wanted to save people from self-destruction. She

wanted to help people heal themselves and become their own superheroes. But how? The answer was revealed one night in a dream. Pam recalls the dream vividly even today, 25 years later. “The dream was handed to me fully formed,” she says, amazement still evident in her tone. “A voice said, ‘This is your path.’ And the path was becoming a chiropractor.” Pam had never thought of becoming a chiropractor, so this dream directive came as a shock. Even so, she never questioned

the dream’s validity. She knew the voice came from her authentic self. She went immediately to her chiropractor and told him that she was going to chiropractic school. “He said, ‘Why would you want to do that?’” Pam recalls with a chuckle. “He thought it was a terrible idea. But that didn’t stop me. I believed in the higher wisdom of the dream, and I went for it.” SUPERHERO TIP #2: Follow your dreams! Tune into your inner knowing about what is right for you. Pay attention

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ COVER STORY }

{ {WOMEN { SHIFT+CONTROL COVERWHO STORY ROC }} }

“I couldn’t go the traditional route that so many of my friends and family took,” Pam says decisively. “I knew it absolutely. If I tried to fit myself into that box, it would be devastating for me.”

to what your dreams are telling you. Your intuition doesn’t lie! Your inner voice speaks to you in positive language, so listen to that positive voice and pay no attention to the negative voices in your head that tell you you’ll never be able to do it. What do you long for and desire? How can you achieve that outcome? Tune into the positive inner voice that guides you to bring your wildest dreams to life.

that many other women faced as well. She wanted to help the female business owners she saw struggling every day to survive and thrive in business. She became a women’s business coach so she could help women achieve the superhero strength they needed to believe in themselves.

Pre-order my forthcoming book SuperCORE to the Rescue! and learn to breathe, move, and spark your innate positive energy! [add Publishizer link] After gaining her Doctorate of Chiropractic, Pam returned to her hometown of Rome, New York and founded her first Network Wellness Center. She discovered that she had much to learn. Running a business, being a new mom to her daughter, and bringing alternative healing to a conservative city was a challenging combination. She realized she would have to develop her superhero skills to new levels in order to prosper. Several ventures later, Pam was well versed in running a business. She began to recognize that the challenges she had faced in achieving a doctorate and starting her own business in a male-dominated field while mothering were challenges 22

After years of working with women on healing their bodies and minds, Pam began to see a pattern emerge. “Listening to women’s stories made me realize that there are three major areas of healing for women: love, sexuality, and money. And these three areas are all connected. I recognized that in working with women, I needed to address all three topics in order to help them truly heal, gain confidence, and activate their inner superhero. Women typically have major

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

blocks that keep them from achieving success in these areas, and they don’t have the tools to move through the blocks and heal their relationship with love, their relationship with sexuality, and their relationship with money. My job was to give them the tools.” SUPERHERO TIP #3: Explore your relationship with love, sexuality, and money! There ARE tools that can help you. Seek out a healer who can help you heal these areas and give you the tools. I have helped hundreds of women to achieve happiness and success, and I would be happy to help you! Read my book On the Other Side: Messages from Spirit for Women to begin breaking through to your authentic selfexpression and power! https://publishizer.com/ supercore-to-the-rescue/ Other-Side-Messages-Spirit-Women/ dp/1978127243/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1 &keywords=dr+pam+denton+on+the+ other+side&qid=1604780966&sr=8-1 Pam’s path took another turn when she moved on from business coaching to become a female sexuality coach. “I made this choice because it became clear to me that sexuality was at the root of women’s pain and dissatisfaction. Sexuality is the deepest, most energetically

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ COVER STORY }

{ {WOMEN { SHIFT+CONTROL COVERWHO STORY ROC }}}

“The dream was handed to me fully formed,” she says, amazement still evident in her tone. “A voice said, ‘This is your path.”

charged part of us. When we are blocked or traumatized, we lose connection with our bodies, our relationships, and our innate intelligence. I saw that sexuality was the base that connected the two other topics of love and money.” Pam observed that when women feel embodied and sexually empowered, they also feel prosperous and abundant, naturally attracting money and the right lover. Conversely, when their sexuality is “off,” they enter a state of lack. Their life force energy is turned off and they can become depressed, as Pam was in college.

innate intelligence, take a SuperCORE BreatheFit or SuperCORE Fit class! https://supercorefit.com/

Satisfying as sexuality coaching could be, it was also challenging. “Women have so many wounds about sexuality that they often shut down and can’t even address the topic,” Pam explains. “I began to feel that I wasn’t reaching as many women as I could if I came to them from another angle. Also, the work was so intense that my own energy was getting drained. I realized that I needed to move on for my own health.” Never one to shirk from the mandate of her body’s innate intelligence, Pam did move on.

“At first, I was devastated,” Pam admits. “I felt like my chance to reach thousands, even millions, of people had been taken from me.” But the pandemic had an unexpected silver lining. Pam started working with a group of female leaders and healers nationwide. She developed the Upgrade, a guided visualization to activate the intelligence of the body’s central nervous system. But something was missing from the Upgrade – a focus on breath and movement to bring people into their bodies. From this realization, SuperCORE Fitness was born.

SUPERHERO TIP #4: Fearlessly follow your intuition! Sometimes your intuition tells you to change course, even though you might be very successful in the course you are on. People might tell you you’re crazy to quit and do something else – but no one knows what’s right for you but YOU! When the world says move on, MOVE ON!

SuperCORE to the Rescue! is motivational fitness that gives your body and immediate relief, builds resilience, resets the nervous system, conditions the body, and promotes optimal function. “SuperCORE to the Rescue! gets people energetically turned on without having the heaviness of the intuitive work and sexuality work,” says Pam. “SuperCORE to the Rescue! is the culmination of all my experience in healing, fitness, yoga, and coaching. It goes directly to

To restore and increase your vital life force energy and connection with your

“I’d had many visions of myself standing on a stage, speaking to thousands of people,” Pam says. “And 2018, I set myself the task of making this vision a reality.” Pam began organizing and speaking at events in New York City and central New York State. She was revving up for a full year of speaking engagements and conferences for 2020 when the COVID-19 pandemic brought such events to a screeching halt.

the source - the core intelligence of the body - through breathing, intentional movement, and positive motivation. SuperCORE to the Rescue! activates the inner superhero instantly!” And the best part? Anyone can do it! SuperCORE to the Rescue! starts from a chair and activates your superhero leadership. Classes are offered virtually and can be taken from your home or office. SuperCORE to the Rescue! comprises three offerings – SuperCORE Fit, SuperCORE Heal, and BreatheFit. Learn more at https://supercorefit.com/ fitness-classes. “SuperCORE to the Rescue! also incorporates my interest in working with businesses,” Pam explains. “My vision is to take SuperCORE to the Rescue! to leaders who can bring it to their team and, ultimately, to big corporations. Everyone’s sitting at their desk in endless Zoom meetings. They feel fatigued, stressed, and stiff from so much sitting. COVID-19 isolation has them feeling disconnected from their teams, depressed, and often anxious. SuperCORE to the Rescue! brings teams together by providing healthy breathing and movement breaks for stress release and mental health.” With SuperCORE to the Rescue!, Pam has integrated the many facets of her expertise. “All aspects of my work culminate in leadership,” Pam states. “And SuperCORE to the Rescue! to the Rescue! is the method for building the necessary core intelligence for leaders to step into their authentic superhero power and positively influence the world.” This gives Pam great satisfaction

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

COVER STORY } } { {SHIFT+CONTROL “Tune into your inner knowing about what is right for you. Pay attention to what your dreams are telling you. Your intuition doesn’t lie!”

as it fulfills a life goal of helping leaders, and women in particular, step into their greatness. “SuperCORE saves lives by providing an energetic lifeline and the positive motivation that is necessary for stepping into our superhero power.” SUPERHERO TIP #5: Put on your cape and fly! Go within, breathe, and listen to your intuition. Take a leap of faith and follow what your inner knowing tells you. And claim your birthright as a superhero in your own life! 26

Join our growing community of superheroes! Sign up for our email list at https://supercorefit.com/. About the Author Hillary Welles is a SuperCORE Fitness instructor, co-author of SuperCORE to the Rescue! and a founding member of the SuperCORE development team. A Black Belt Nia instructor and Nia MOVE It™ instructor, she brings nearly two decades of holistic fitness experience and intensive study to her work with

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

SuperCORE to the Rescue!. She holds an MA in Shakespeare Studies from the University of Birmingham, England and a BA in English Language and Literature from Smith College. Hillary has ghostwritten and edited many books in the field of personal growth and is passionate about sharing the benefits of integrative fitness through a powerful blend of strength, humor, spiritual presence, and skill.

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Let yourself be motivated by what lights your inner fire, not by what others tell you is right for you. Stop listening to the mandates of others and listen to your internal mandates!â&#x20AC;?

COMING JAN. 2021

IGNITING WOMEN W

WOMAN

WE ARE VERY EXCITED TO ANNOUNCE THE INFLUENTIAL WOMAN ONLINE! Sharing Stories of Women in Leadership and Expert Advice on Money, Love, Health, Intimacy & Relationships ______

Women world changers advertise with us! Allow your voice to be heard and seen! Yes, now is the time! For more information please contact networkrocqueen@gmail.com or drpamdenton@gmail.com

WORLD CHANGERS

WE ARE ALL CREATIVE.

CREATIVE COLLABORATORS.

COLLABORATORS OF BIG IDEAS.

IDEAS SPARKED FROM DEEP INSIGHTS.

INSIGHTS THAT ARE WELL-INFORMED.

INFORMED THROUGH MEANINGFUL CONNECTIONS.

CONNECTIONS TO COMMUNITY.

COMMUNITY THINKING, CARING AND GIVING.

GIVING BACK AND ENGAGING TO MAKE A LASTING IMPACT.

A LASTING IMPACT FOR OPPORTUNITY, GROWTH AND RESULTS.

RESULTS THAT MATTER.

MATTER FOR BUSINESS AND ESPECIALLY PEOPLE.

PEOPLE POWERING TOGETHER TO MAKE SOMETHING GREAT.

MAKING SOMETHING GREAT TOGETHER.

Dixon Schwabl is an all-in marketing agency obsessed with driving growth for the organizations we work with. All in the name of increased brand value and measurable results. All created from a hearty balance of innovation, passion, respectful partnerships and strong workplace culture.

Powered by our broad capabilities, expertise and data-driven insights, we uncover your unique story, then amplify it far and wide. The right mix of on-point strategy and free-range creativity brings it all together for a unified brand experience.

Our varied and integrated services: Market Research Business Intelligence & Marketing Analytics Business & Marketing Strategy Branding Advertising & Design Media Planning & Buying Website Development Marketing Automation Content Marketing & Social Media Public Relations Virtual Events

Connect all of your marketing channels by connecting today. Letâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s start a new project together. Call Dave Brodsky at 585.899.1952 or visit dixonschwabl.com.

GREAT PLACE TO WORK

T PLACE TO

Y THE GR D B

FULL

NYS CERTIFIED

WBE

SERVICE

BUSINESS

RK INSTI

{ WOMEN FOR A GOOD { SHIFT+CONTROL } } WHO CAUSE INSPIRE

TAKING OVER THE REIGNS BY KIM ALLEN I PHOTOS BY BRODY WHEELER

NAVIGATING A LEADERSHIP TRANSITION IN THE STORM OF A GLOBAL PANDEMIC WE NEVER SAW COMING

CALM BEFORE THE STORM We were poised to have a banner year. Our leadership team had developed a strategic plan to carry us through the transition and beyond. We had a team of 100 best-in-class professionals

January 1, 2020, began a year of transition for Dixon Schwabl leadership. That month, our CEO and president announced an upcoming leadership transition after 33 years. On October 1, 2020, I humbly accepted the role of CEO alongside my trusted colleague of 17 years, Jessica Savage, who stepped into the role of president. We had close to one year to lay out our strategic plan and prepare our team for what our organization would become under our leadership.

On March 16, everything shifted. The first of many disruptive moments was upon us as we moved our workforce to 100% work from home virtually overnight. BATTEN DOWN THE HATCHES There are a million and one adages describing how one weathers a crisis. Cool under pressure, steady as we go—the list goes on. I’ve been told I possess grace under fire. Perhaps that was engrained in me throughout my childhood while observing my parents run their restaurant business.

I’ve always been up for a challenge. Even as a young girl, all someone had to do was tell me I couldn’t. Challenge accepted.

Little did we know, a pandemic was about to hurl a tidal wave sizeable enough to check our strength and wily enough to test what we were made of. The world was telling me I couldn’t. Challenge accepted.

two legendary businesspeople into its next phase of evolution.

When our people moved to WFH, our leadership team instantly began making decisions about how we would get through this. The rate of decision making was rapid. There wasn’t time to overthink our decisions. And our managing partners sprang into action to address our staff’s well-being. all pointed in the same direction. Our plan was rolled out in February and the reaction from the team was palpable. They were excited and ready to take on the work to help us move a wildly successful business built by

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

We began meeting daily at 8am, identifying ways to care for staff and ensure they were as comfortable as could be. We decided on weekly check-in calls to stay connected and ensure their sense of safety and

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

“I’m here for it. The wellcharted path laid by Lauren Dixon and Mike Schwabl has me set up for success.”

{ WOMEN WHO INSPIRE } “Little did we know, a pandemic was about to hurl a tidal wave sizeable enough to check our strength and wily enough to test what we were made of. The world was telling me I couldn’t. Challenge accepted.”

security. We realized maintaining similar routines was important, so we continued to host our weekly all-staff meeting virtually. With our people cared for, we quickly turned to our partners. We found that constant and close contact with our clients and industry partners was essential. “We’re in this together” could not be more true: Were they safe and healthy? And then, what could we do to help them and their people? Many of our partners needed guidance on how to market in difficult times, and we worked through that together.

of unexpected weather. The foggy behavior of the virus, the constant

I’m here for it. The well-charted path laid by Lauren Dixon and Mike Schwabl has me set up for success. I have the most capable cocaptain at my side in Jessica Savage and an unmatched leadership crew steering 100 superstar shipmates. So bring on the next test, 2020. Challenge accepted. Kim Allen is the CEO at Dixon Schwabl, an integrated marketing agency in Upstate New York. She accepted this position on October 1, 2020.

Our strategic plan received a lot of attention, too. With the ability to focus some of our energy on strategic initiatives, we found ourselves moving the plan forward faster than anticipated. Never has it been more evident that a strong team of well-aligned leaders is essential for a business to navigate something of this size. Riding the waves The COVID-19 storm has produced what seems like a career’s worth 38

like transitioning to a CEO post in these conditions is an insurmountable challenge.

rolling thunder of statistics and the lack of clear direction for where to steer the ship. It would be easy to feel

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ WOMEN WHO INSPIRE { SHIFT+CONTROL } } “I’ve been told I possess grace under fire. Perhaps that was engrained in me throughout my childhood while observing my parents run their restaurant business.”

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

“Never has { SHIFT+CONTROL } it been more evident that a strong team of well-aligned leaders is essential for a business to navigate something of this size.”

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

BUY 1 GET 1 FREE

Start off 2021 with the Central and Western N magazines are the pla

WWW.ROCHESTERWOMANONLINE.COM I NETWOR

PREMIERE Womenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Publication of Upstate, NY. Rochester & Central NY Woman Online ace to start your New Year off with a BANG!

RKROCQUEEN@GMAIL.COM

{ FOR A GOOD CAUSE QUEEN OF ARTS }} } {{ SHIFT+CONTROL

AMANDA ASHLEY BY KELLY BREUER I PHOTOS BY JEFF GEREW

Recently Central NY Woman Online sat down with musician, mom, entrepreneur, and “Afternoon Cocktail Talk Show” host, Amanda Ashley as she talked to us about what inspires her, why music and so much more. Enjoy, because we definitely did with this talented lady!

poetry. I began writing my own music around the age of 13 or 14, and from there began putting my voice to the music I had been composing. I found music to be a judgemental free form

Tell us a little bit about Amanda Ashley and your love of music: I was born and raised in Long Island, New York and began my musical journey at the early age of 6 years old. Of all the activities I explored in my youth, music and art were my constants, were where I excelled and felt most at home. Around the age of four my babysitter called my mother to offer her piano, as she was getting divorced and had noticed my interest in piano. From her house, to my childhood home my parents moved it and I had begged for two years for piano lessons. My sixth birthday, my father drove me straight to the music store to surprise me with my first piano lesson. Music ignited me in a way that nothing else ever could. Eventually I had begun playing violin, and then guitar in my early teens, and eventually began taking myself more seriously as a vocalist. Aside from music, I always had a knack for creative writing, would keep a journal and would write 48

of expression where I could air out my teenage angst, and confusion. It also made me feel like I had an identity. I moved to Rochester after graduating from Fredonia State University, to begin

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

my adult life with then college sweetheart. Rochester was way more affordable to live, and I always admired the culture our little city has to offer. What was your first entrepreneurial venture? As a twenty three year old I was desperately trying to find my place in life. I always believed that I possessed some strong qualities and wanted to find a way to gather my gifts; event coordinating, music and art, and my love for making connections. I began organizing ticketed events under the name “Local Visionaries” at local venues such as Lovin Cup, Lemoncello Cafe and Tango Cafe. Each event would feature sometimes 3-10 fine artists and craft vendors, a wine and food tasting, and 3-4 live performances from local singer-songwriters. I saw it as an avenue to connect myself with people whom I felt inspired, a way to generate income, and a way of bringing our community together. At the time I was ambitiously aiming towards putting together shows once a month, which eventually dwindled down to a few times a year. At the time I was also attending the open mic scene here in Rochester in effort to build my presence as a songwriter.

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

“I felt soo inspired by my friends in the music community, and the tremendous impact attending these open mics had on my musical growth that I eventually began hosting my own.”

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL QUEEN OF ARTS }} “K2 Brewing in Webster always felt a bit like my home base for performances. I really miss performing there.”

I felt soo inspired by my friends in the music community, and the tremendous impact attending these open mics had on my musical growth that I eventually began hosting my own (and for many years). My partner, Beau Ryan stood with me throughout all of it, ions before we even realized our true love for one another. He is my business partner to this day, and there is no one’s talent or input I respect more on all my various crazy endeavors.

show, and ask those thought provoking questions that lended itself towards the emotional state which we all could relate to. I view Afternoon Cocktail as an altruistic avenue to inspire, educate and to motivate our followers (and myself in turn) to live and lead with empathy and compassion.

Afternoon Cocktail merged out of panic and depression as the pandemic hit. Having always been a planner, the uncertainties of cash flow and future performances really had me questioning what else left I had to offer. I began doing some research and studying Positive Psychology to get myself mentally back on track. Recognizing the power of livestreaming as a resource, I began brainstorming ideas which I could use my talents to bring positivity back to the public platform, and found myself revisiting the idea of Afternoon Cocktail Talk Show. Years prior I had explored hosting a livestreaming talk show under the same name, which the concept was good, but could use a little direction and refinement. I find the human factor in Covid to be most compelling, as this is the first time in history where people of all walks of life are commonly experiencing a trauma that has affected the way we view, perceive, and conduct our daily lives. Being both an artist, and woman of business, I wanted to gain the perspectives of two highly intelligent/talented people per 52

them and because of their continued love and support. Who has been the best interview you have had and why? This is such a tough question because I truly have enjoyed soo many of the interviews I’ve had for several different reasons. I press my guests with some deep thought provoking questions, and am soo grateful for everyone’s honesty. At the heart of it, I’m just a fan girl who truly admires, respects and is inspired by each person I invite on. I feel fortunate to have a platform and opportunity to ask all the questions I really truly desire to hear the answers to. Where is your most favorite place to perform and why? K2 Brewing in Webster always felt a bit like my home base for performances. I really miss performing there. They have the best beer, the crowd is always fun to interact with, and I feel most comfortable being myself.

Who is the most influential person in your life and why did you choose them? I am soo very fortunate to have had two incredibly supportive parents, who although not musicians themselves, never discouraged me from following my passion and my gut instinct. They recognized, nurtured and encouraged my love of art, but also instilled and exemplified the power of having a good work ethic. I am who I am because of

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

How has being in the music industry changed for you during the pandemic? Although nothing will ever top performing live, I do believe that there’s beauty to the intimacy of what livestreaming has brung. Livestreaming allows artists the opportunity to showcase themselves on a personal level, from their personal space. We can perform and openly interact with our audience if we choose, talk about our original music and what inspired us to write it, and have the opportunity to be viewed by people all over the world.

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ QUEEN OF ARTS } “Afternoon Cocktail merged out of panic and depression as the pandemic hit.”

In most cases at my local shows I was performing more cover music than my originals for the sake of engaging, people pleasing, and feeding the venue owners what they wanted/believed they were hiring me for.

for him, how crucial time is, and how much more life there is to live beyond harvesting a career. Having him allows me to exercise the big kid in me, and he truly just brings soo much joy to my heart.

What has been your biggest challenge? What has been your biggest success? I find lack of time to be my biggest challenge. I truly believe I’d have to make five carbon copies of myself in order to accomplish all the things I’d truly like to get done on any given day.

You have the signature flower that you always have in your hair... How did that start? I’ve always been a bit of an accessory queen throughout my life. I began wearing a flower in my early twenties during performances as a tribute to Billy Holiday and also as a Hawaiian tribute (One of my favorite places I’ve traveled).

My biggest success I’d say is being able to support myself solely creating art. I certainly am far from being rich, but I am truly grateful to live and lead a passionate life which I am able to channel my creativity in a way that others can also benefit. If you could do one thing over knowing what you do now, what would that be? I;m self taught in business, and I believe that having had prior education would’ve helped me get further along a lot sooner. If I could do anything over, I would’ve gone to school for Business/ advertising and marketing. What do you see for the future for you personally and professionally? I aspire to do more with my writing in the future. My 5-8 year plan is to write and publish a book of my own, as well as a children’s book. How has being a mom changed you? Having my son has been extremely humbling and eye opening. I realize how important it is to set a good example

It became more of a regular staple in my waitressing days. So often the customers who wanted to request me as their server couldn’t remember my name, but could always recall “The girl with the flower.” Friends and family would buy them for me just as a thought in passing if they’d see one, and eventually my collection grew. It’s truly become such a part of me…. I literally feel naked without it. Some people like to wear watches, I rock a flower…..almost always, just not when I shower or sleep. If you had the ability to mentor another woman, would you consider it? I’ve mentored young girls over the years throughout the course of my teaching career and volunteering efforts at Girls Rock Camp. Currently and most seriously, I’m mentoring a student of mine, 16 year old Abbie Riggins. She’s an incredible vocalist and songwriter, and we share a significant amount of musical chemistry. I’ve co-written about 10 songs with her, and we are working on putting

together a project and getting some of her music recorded. She’s a superstar, and it won’t take long for people to recognize that if they already haven’t. Ultimately I hope that I can guide her in the right direction and inspire her confidence to grow. Looking back, are there any indications from childhood that foreshadowed your becoming a musician and a female entrepreneur? I had my heart and mind set on becoming a music teacher and performer since I was a child, so I don’t think that ever came as a surprise for anyone who knew me. As for entrepreneurship, it’s hysterical to think back to my early days as a child, hustling to make my own money. From lemonade stands, to buying bulk candy bars and Jolly Ranchers at Price Club with my allowance money so that I could sell them to my school friends for a marginal profit, shoveling driveways and raking stranger’s yards…. I always enjoyed the challenge of finding new ways to generate some cash flow. How do you solve your big problems both as a woman and a female entrepreneur? I find that keeping myself honest, and asking for help when needed is the key to resolving most problems. What tips do you have for other women who would like to start their own businesses? Don’t be blindsided by fear. Be willing to take risks, work hard, be persistent, keep focused, follow your instinct, and don’t ever take no for an answer. Also,

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Women emp women. I love see rise, and suppor along thei

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

powering other eing women on the rting one another ir journey.â&#x20AC;?

{ QUEEN OF ARTS } “I aspire to do more with my writing in the future. My 5-8 year plan is to write and publish a book of my own, as well as a children’s book.”

be conscious of where you are investing your time and energy, and that you are investing it in all the right places. What are the pros and cons of being a female business owner and musician in 2020? Pros- Women empowering other women. I love seeing women on the rise, and supporting one another along their journey. Cons- I still believe for all the progress women have made, we still have a ways to go before we can truly claim 58

ourselves as being equals. Reality is that not all men want to take a big chested woman seriously.. In the past I felt I had to go the extra mile to prove that I was intelligent, and not just a bimbo. Same goes to the men in the crowd at past places I’ve performed at. No gig is worth being demeaned or disrespected for. Fortunately I’m experiencing much less of that these days, as I’m working with more quality venue owners and classier establishments. What is one thing our readers may not know about you?

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

I’m really passionate about cooking. Maybe in another life I would’ve taken the culinary route. I literally cook every day for my family, and love to get creative in the kitchen. What do you have planned for 2021? New music project, and to independently release another single or two. I plan to continue working on growing Afternoon Cocktail and it’s brand, and hopefully to pick the paint brush up again to create more visual art in the very near future.

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

{ DISHING WITH THE DIVA’S } { SHIFT+CONTROL }

THE DELAVAN HOTEL BY KELLY BREUER & MICHELLE DIBERNARDO

Recently Rochester Woman Online shuffled off to Buffalo for a weekend full of relaxing spa treatments, fine dining, fashion and more at the Delavan Hotel & Spa at Salvatore’s. Rochester Woman reached out to the owner of the Delavan about the idea of coming to this glamorous hotel to do a fashion photoshoot featuring some local designers, photogrpahers and models. Then, after talking further with Russell Salvatore, and David the manager, we decided it would be amazing for our audience to take the journey with us. From live feeds during the weekend, and lots of photos and social media posts, we now are very excited to bring you our “Dishing with the Diva’s” special feature, dishing all the dirt on our incredible experience that lastest all weekend long. From the amazing staff that greeted us as we walked in, down to every one knowing exactly who we were and why we were there, it was ike being far away in another place. It definitely was need after the months and months of Covid craziness. A LITTLE BIT ABOUT THE HOTEL... The Salvatore family welcomes you to Western New York’s Premier Boutique Hotel. Designed for comfort, The Delavan has 60 elegantly appointed, luxury rooms and suites, large hallways and a spacious lobby. Amenities 62

include a full spa from the award winning Capello’s Salon and Day Spa, offering hair, manicure and pedicure services, a fitness center, and the newest in integrated electronic technology. I will admit the chandeliers at the

The Salvatore’s “campus” hosts not only the hotel, incredible ballrooms and winding staircases, but also the Chandelier Bar, a top dress to impress restaurant, beautiful european style decor and even a cute little boutique that had everything you can imagine and a lot of local businesses items! I can’t wait to go back again! FROM MICHELLE We stayed for Rochester Woman & Central New York Woman Online’s fashion spread along with the review for the hotel and boy did they make it special. On arriving there was a cute buffalo statue in the front. I loved the feel of them adding little details of their hometown of Buffalo, New York into the decor. Kelly & I arrived and there was no wait and 2 incredible staff members to greet us and tell us where we would be spending our weekend.

front lobby and the u-shaped chairs on every floor had me sold from the very beginning. Our rooms, well lets just say I never wanted to leave. Inredible chandelier prints hanging behind each of the queen beds, and a glass rain shower that was truly to die for! It was a little slice of heaven even for only a couple days.

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

While walking through this luxurious hotel full of chandeliers, a pool table and more, I was thinking how unfortunate it was due to COVID-19 that they can not currently be at full capacity. Our Deluxe Double Queen room was amazing when we arrived with fabulous photos of chandeliers above our beds and a nice 42” TV. Wifi was easily accessible. Our mini refrigerator came in handy later for our leftovers from Salvatore’s. Menu available at the link: http://salvatoresitalianprime.com/. The bathroom had a walk-in rain

{ SHIFT+CONTROL } { DISHING WITH THE DIVAâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL } { DISHING WITH THE DIVA’S } “I will admit the chandeliers at the front lobby and the u-shaped chairs on every floor had me sold from the very beginning.”

shower, double granite vanity with a private toilet area. I slept like a baby counting sheep in the amazing queen size bed. Now no woman can have too many pillows but the fluff on the pillows that were at the Delavan were super extraordinary. The staff, management and overall hotel was superb. This hotel has a chandelier bar, restaurant, gift shop and spa all under one roof. The best part about Salvatore’s is that the food is actually amazing. How convenient is it to go to fine dining in the hotel you’re staying in and only have to go up in the elevator to your exquisite room.

Did you know that they’re having a Thanksgiving Grab & Go dinner option from Salvatore’s? How amazing is that! While at dinner we did have the opportunity to meet the owner how sweet he was. I always love to see where the actual owners are inside the restaurants and businesses that shows to me that they actually care.

safety during COVID-19. If you have a chance make sure you check out their chandelier bar that is absolutely gorgeous. Perfect spot to take pictures on a date. Make sure to pack your little black dress ladies. We cannot wait to return at they offer so many packages.

Some of the ladies and I checked out the gift shop and it’s amazing prices. We were quite surprised. They even had really cute Boutique items. In the morning they had grab-and-go yogurts, fruits, coffee and teas for your convenience as well as your CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ FOR A GOOD CAUSE { DISHING WITHCHATTER THE DIVA’S {{ SHIFT+CONTROL }} } } PLATTER

THE DELAVAN SPA & SALON BY KELLY BREUER & MICHELLE DIBERNARDO

So while Rochester Woman Online was holding up at the Delavan Hotel, Michelle and I got to experience some of their amazing amenities including treatments from their beautiful spa and blow out’s and styles in their salon. Thes staff were truly so much fun to talk to and work with, and the services were not only relaxing but made us both feel totally fabulous for our weekend photoshoot.

experience from the moment I walked into my treatment room. Their 60 minute custom facial begins with the cleanser best suited for each individuals skin needs, oily, sensitive, or dehydrated. Preparing the surface for

Then, their signature 60 minute body treatment is known as their “Hanakasumi sensorial escape” which is derived from the Japanese ritual bath ceremony. It involves a double exfoliation with an enzyme based cherry blossom rice powder exfoliant applied with light massage technique, and then removed with exfoliating gloves. Finally a warm shea butter melt with Asian essences is applied for a luxurious finish to this body treatment. My skin felt not only silky smooth but almost like it was relieved.

Friday was spa day and Saturday was for hair styling with the beautiful ladies in the salon. When we arrived Friday for our spa day, we each received 2 services. I was given a 60min signature body treatment and facial, while Michelle was next door getting a massage and then pedicure. They welcomed us with Spa robes and slippers when we first arrived before entering our treatment rooms that were nice and relaxing from the moment we entered. from the dimmed lighting, earth tones and spa music to the heated bed. The spa uses the international pharmaceutical grade skin care product “Sothys” for their facial treatments as well as their body treatments which visibly improve skin after one treatment. Lisa Poole, the spa manager, provided me with a hands on body treatment that left my skin silky smooth and my body feeling nice and relaxed. The facial was truly incredible and she paid so much attention to detail and me having a great

to promote cell renewal using a Kaolin, rice starch and oat flour based product. Finally masking is applied, using their favorite Hyaluronic smoothing mask. Once it is removed the skin has renewed elasticity and radiance. I felt 10 years younger.

the next step of deep pore cleansing to remove the impurities from the pores using lipo amino acid, which leaves a radiant complexion. I left with my skin glowing! Next a grain free peeling is performed

Saturday, we got to get our hair style with a blowout and curls from the ladies in the Delavan Salon. Starting with a shampoo using their signature Lanza product line, we got to sit back and relax and enjoy the morning. We had a blast laughing and chatting with our incredible stylists. I went with a super cute smooth beachy wave for my look while Michelle went with some sexy curls. It was really a fun start to the day filled with non-stop photoshoots and well of course we had to take some selfies while we were there too...

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ DISHING WITH THE DIVA’S } { SHIFT+CONTROL } “This is definitely somewhere I will be coming back to on my next Buffalo trip.”

MICHELLE DIBERNARDO Arriving to the salon we were greeted by the spa manager as she quickly brought Kelly and I upstairs to an area that had a few lockers along with robes and slippers. We were given a personal key and a water bottle and asked to slip into our robes and our slippers and lock our belongings up before going to our rooms. How safe does that make you feel with your purse all locked up so you can truly relax while you get that massage?

The next treatment for myself was a their spa pedicure. Had my little toes looking fabulous for my opened toes shoes for our photoshoots. Now, the next morning we were scheduled

We both did wash our hair before we went down to the salon and quickly found out that they were going to wash our hair and do a blowout along with curling our hair for our big day. My stylist was great and my favorite part as usual is getting my hair washed with that phenomenal head massage. Wash and style is offered at the salon for $45. How reasonable and convenient is that, especially for hotel guest to get ready for a fun evening out, or dinner and cocktails.

We were asked to step out of the staging area when we were ready and then we were quickly brought to two separate rooms where treatments would start. I received a deep tissue massage for 60 minutes ,which I’m not sure if I lasted for the full amount of time because I normally fall asleep when given a massage. The deep tissue massage uses firm manipulating technique to facilitate muscle recovery and improve fatigued or extreme tight muscle issues. Once the massage ended you were given an option to slowly get up. Myself of course jumped up and wanted to move on to the next treatment because I was so excited.

Tiffanie at Salon Bella Vita in Rochester.

to get our hair done to prep for our amazing fashion spread for Rochester Woman Online. Both Kelly and I were not sure if we needed to wash our hair as we had both recently had cuts and colors by our own personal stylists. Mine being Santana Murray of Hair by Santana in Syracuse and Kelly with

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

The spa offers so many more services for such a reasonable cost.These ladies have even prepared wedding parties staying at the hotel. Customer service was superb in the spa. This is definitely somewhere I will be coming back to on my next Buffalo trip hey I might even get my false lashes done here. The spa even offers a variety of packages so be sure to check their link to their packages: http://thedelavanspa.com/ packages.

{ DISHING WITH THE DIVAâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S } { SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ {FOR A GOOD CAUSE CHATTER {{ PLATTER SHIFT+CONTROL SHIFT+CONTROL }} } PLATTER CHATTER

SALVATORE’S AT THE DELAVAN BY KELLY BREUER & MICHELLE DIBERNARDO

While we were in Buffalo at the fabulous Delavan Hotel, we had the pleasure of being able to enjoy a “dress to impress”, ultimate dining experience like no other ar Salvatore’s restaurant. And can I just say it did not disappoint. Plus we has a special gues, model Jess Stepien whom actually worked for the restaurant for 7 years prior. It was fun to have a “tour guide” for our dining esperience. Since 1938, the Salvatore name has been synonymous with exceptional service and hospitality. Four generations of Salvatore family pride go into each detail of your visit as our guest. Even Russ Salvatore came to our table and greeted and talked with us about the history and food. We walked as he made his rounds to personally greet each and every guest. Our waiter was absolutely amazing and recommended drinks, appetizers and entres that are some of the guests favorites. We were greeted like royalty when we checked in and were seated in the dining area after a long day of photoshoots. It was finally time to relax and enjoy some drinks and food and boy was I starving. We all decided to try 3 different drinks on their fabulous list so we could all get to enjoy them. I had a specialty Sangria that was super tasty! It was so fun to chat with our waiter, and amongst ourselves and watch all the interactions 78

around us. There were couples, young and old guests. It was such a great mix and everyone was so friendly. Although they had to accomodate for the Covid restrictions, there was a constant flow of people all night long.

topped with the lobster oscar with a side or brussel sprouts parmesan. It was truly one of the most amazing meals I have ever had. It was absolutely cooked to perfection. The brussels spouts were so tasty.

For starters (appetizers) we decided to all get something different so we ccould all share. I ordered the calamari featuring sun dried tomatoes • kalamata olive pepperoncini • romesco while Michelle

Jess went with the Lobster Risotto featuring asparagus • risotto • taagon • mascarpone. Ill admit, I did eat a little of her’s. Jess had never had it before. The risotto is the perfect addition to the lobster. I’ll let Michelle dish about her experience for herself. Italian and Prime are the specialties at Salvatore’s and they present an unrivaled full-service dining experience. Their fine dining restaurant offers the highest quality cuts, the freshest seafood, signature sides and inspired appetizers all complimented by an award winning wine list.

ordered the antipasto board that was truly to die for and had daily selection of meats & cheeses • olives roasted red pepper • balsamic reduction imported olive oil • artisan bread. When the waiter came back to get our dinner order, none of us could decide because it all looked so good! But, I decided to go big. One thing I love is to eat. I ordered the 14oz strip steak

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

The Delavan Hotel and Spa are perfect destinations for a romantic night out, a business dinner, or that special event that has to be perfect for your family and friends, and they proudly boast an award winning wine list with over 500 offerings from around the world. MICHELLE DIBERNARDO This place was absolutely gorgeous with great decor. Such a relief to come in after a long full day of hard work at the

SHIFT+CONTROL { PLATTER CHATTER }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

SHIFT+CONTROL {{ PLATTER CHATTER } “Salvatore’s had fabulous mouth-watering appetizers, amazing signature drinks and filet mignon seasoned so well that I did not even need salt, pepper or A1(like I normally bath my steak in).”

Delavan Hotel for Rochester Woman & Central NY Woman Online’s fashion spread. Salvatore’s had fabulous mouth-watering appetizers, amazing signature drinks and filet mignon seasoned so well that I did not even need salt, pepper or A1(like I normally bath my steak in). Now that says a lot considering I am the woman who salts and seasons everything but her Chinese food. The food is great, showcasing italian, seafood, steaks, wines, signature cocktails, and desserts all available at very reasonable prices, especially for a fine dining experience. Now, most fabulous five star restaurants bring out bread, however, Salvatore’s had phenomenal fresh bread along with a couple different flavored butters and oils. To me, this makes me a super happy human being of the Italian descent. While having a girl chat about our day and sampling each other’s signature cocktails that were all quite tasty, we ordered our appetizers. The three of us having such different taste buds, ordered 84

the following: Artichokes Francaise, Calamari and the Antipasto Board. The Antipasto Board alone could have filled any one of us. In fact, I think it did a bit, but that did not stop me from the astonishing food or cocktails to come.

with the stuffed baked potato. I love a juicy filet so I ordered it medium. It was just so amazing and had savory flavors that were to die for. The wait staff were courteous and prompt and very friendly and engaging. Now I will have to say, it was a cheat day so I ordered the chocolate cake for dessert and WOW! We of course had so many leftovers that were packed in boxes to go. If you are looking to enjoy fine dining in the Buffalo area then you need to go check Salvatore’s out. Now a little secret I hear is that the best time of year to go is at Christmas time.

So even though I’m not into seafood nor artichokes, I did try both of the ladies appetizers and I will say for not having artichokes before those were absolutely tasty. The calamari actually worked for me, the texture was not rubbery like with some restaurants. It was cooked perfectly. For my entree I ordered the filet mignon

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

Buffalonians say that The Delavan Hotel & Salvatore’s go wild with their amazing Christmas decor. A family friendly place to go to have an affordable, delicious meal. Find their menu in the link below http:// salvatoreshospitality.com/salvatoresfine-dining-menu! Well we hope you enjoyed our review of the Delavan Hotel & Spa and Salvatore’s and make your reservation for your getaway. Tell them Rochester Woman Online sent you.

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

SHIFT+CONTROL {{ PLATTER CHATTER }} “Next time you and your friends or family crave italian food, make a stop over to Tony D’s in Cornhill Landing. They’ll treat you like family.”

I must say they didn’t disappoint… omg!!! Magnifico!!!! The pistachio pound cake was to die for, also the black cherry cheesecake converted me to a cherry lover!! The restaurant has doors that open up

to the outside, so you can feel the breeze off the Genesee river, the staff is friendly and accommodating. Tony D’s also has a banquet room for those looking for a good place for a staff or an organization event for 2021. Lord willing, fingers crossed. Their drinks are also amazing,

they have an espresso martini that is deliziosa ( delicious in Italian). When you drink it, you forget there’s alcohol in it(so be careful). The experience we had was just amazing, there was wonderful background music

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

ALL ACCESS} { {SHIFT+CONTROL }

“MY NEXT DAY IS MY BEST DAY” BY DR SHANELLE BENSON REID I PHOTO BY MICHAL LEPORE

A NEW WAY OF BEING This is my daily affirmation on my good days and on my great days. As of lately, I’ve needed it. Recently, I decided I wanted to try something new; a new way of being. Not saying I don’t enjoy my typical, I simply decided to try something different. In August, I met my yogi. I didn’t know she would be my yogi when I met her, but she is now. Having a yogi transformed my existence. From there, I decided to become a certified yoga teachers. Which lead me to finally becoming totally plant-based. I had a chef who helped me create meals but I needed a bit ore cajoling. And since I am an all in kind of girl, I will be pursuing a plantbased nutrition certification in the very near future, with the desire to open a wellness center in the not so distant future, Global SAGE Wellness. That being said, I am terrified. I am extremely confident when it comes to my consulting business and really any other venture that uses my “traditional, school-based knowledge” but this is different. BREAKING FROM TRADITION There’s a level of confidence that we all want to exude; being grounded in womanhood, recognizing our worth to the world, understanding our legacy. But this lack of confidence in the nontraditional realm is a sad commentary on how identity is tied to perceived standards of success. Our brilliance and existence must be valued, appreciated and promoted in all aspects and professions.

The beautician is as worthy as the neurosurgeon. Likewise, the professor is as exceptional as the baker. As women we need embrace all of our pieces, and not merely those approved by societal standards of achievement. The days of being marginalized no longer exist: stand up, shout out, be heard, be you. A NEW WAY OF BEING I do not profess to have the answers to life’s questions, but I do accept that

most answers can be found within. I am often asked, if I could change anything about my life, what would it be and my answer remains the same. I wouldn’t change a thing. I love this life, but I truly love the ability to choose differently at any time. Therefore, if entrepreneurship is your passion build the business. If education is your call create the learning environment. If you are the literary genius, then write the story. Walk in excellence, embrace what you have to offer and share it with the masses. Your time is now. This is not

about empowerment, empowerment implies asking for permission. This is about revolution, fix your crown and walk in your purpose. The days of sitting docilely, waiting for the right moment are over. Seize every opportunity presented or create your own. Let’s commit to designing spaces to live, be and thrive; our existence depends on our commitment to self and sisterhood. Here are my steps. What are yours? Step 1: Embrace our difference — we are stronger together. Step 2: Share our successes — spread the great news. Step 3: Encourage growth — evolve and prepare for new experiences. Step 4: Pursue education —s eek learning opportunities. Step 5: Nurture ourselves — practice self-care. Step 6: Smile frequently —h appiness abounds. Step 7: Preserve nature — this is our home. Step 8: Love deeply — there is nothing better than love. Step 9: Exercise gratitude — be thankful and appreciative. Step 10: Meditate and pray – know your source. CHOOSE YOU Who were you before responsibility jolted your reality? Your best life is waiting for you. Your time is now. I know fear can be debilitating, but I encourage you to do it afraid. Choose to live, Choose to Be!

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ UNSTOPPABLE { SHIFT+CONTROL WOMEN } }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ UNSTOPPABLE WOMEN }

DANCING IN THE RAIN CAN TURN YOUR DAY AROUND BY DR. PAM DENTON I PHOTOS BY KL STORYOGRAPHY

Move in a new way to inspire the changes you seek. -Dr. Pam I have been teaching this mantra in my healing, coaching, and movement leadership for over 20 years as a way to tell women that real, authentic expression is key to our success. Moving in a new way - whether it’s physical, mental, or emotional - will allow you to receive desired changes in health, wealth and relationship. Change your dance step to change your life!

programs that will become stronger than the old ones. How can you do this? By EXPRESSING your true self, the part of you that knows how to dance, play, and live life to its fullest! That’s where dancing in the rain

But why is that so hard to do? Change is often easy to imagine, but not so easy to implement. That is because the nervous system creates habitual programs, or moves, to which we become accustomed. Most of the patterns for living and surviving are programmed at a very young age, and we get used to the constant grind, the nonstop wheel of “to do’s” on our list. But these lists keep us going in one direction - running forward, head down, teeth gritted, getting it done. And many of us don’t feel like we can afford to take the self-care time that is necessary to stop the runaway train of stress and fatigue. To shift this runaway train and release the overwhelming load of stress, it is essential to create new, healthy

photoshoot. Cancel the trivial stuff, take a dance break, meet a friend for a drink, crank your favorite music, and MOVE to your groove! Dancing in the rain could be YOUR outlet for freeing your nervous system to relax, calm your mind,sleep like a baby, and wake up feeling renewed and refreshed. When you dance in the rain, you are doing something out of the ordinary. You’re creating a new pattern. You bring expressive, fresh, and revitalizing energy into your day. So how can you dance in the rain? Let’s explore some possibilities for how you can apply new expressive movement to your day. I have used all of these tools for creating new energy and manifesting power in women so they can be unstoppable. Here we go!

comes in! I use it as a metaphor for finding your creative outlet for selfexpression and stress release. Recently, I danced in the rain, put on my rain boots and had a fun rainy day

• Put on your rain boots (or high heels) and let’s dance! The easiest way to reboot your body and change your fatigue and mental anguish is by getting up and out of your current situation. Remove yourself fully from the pattern that you are stuck in by doing something brand new! Dance, explore, express yourself! It does not have to be perfect, you just need to move in a new and expressive way to stimulate a break in the pattern

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

â&#x20AC;&#x153;To shift this runaway train and release the overwhelming load of stress, it is essential to create new, healthy programs that will become stronger than the old ones.â&#x20AC;?

• Strike a pose! This is what I like to call the “hot seat of power.” Put yourself in the center of life on your own throne or red carpet. Stand tall and strike a posture of empowered success. In SuperCORE I like to use Superwoman pose with hands on hips or a bicep curl to showcase my strength. Show yourself your power and make it a statement to the world. The body knows! • Laugh and live out loud! ROAR! ROAR is a Radical Opportunity Appearing RIGHT NOW. When we are expressing ourselves out loud we begin to hear our power in new ways. A good old roar of power or expressing yourself to a friend in a real and authentic way will help 98

release the old and bring forth a new, energized you. What you want to achieve could be only one expression of happiness and power away! Take time off, contact a friend and go play. Talk to your friends about what you want and laugh, dance, run, walk... whatever it takes to ensure you are expressing your real and authentic self! Have fun playing with and personalizing these three steps. They will help you forge a new path that will allow you to move beyond sleepless nights, mental fatigue, anger, helplessness, and frustration. Create a new pattern consciously by setting your intent. Cancel the small meetings that drag you down, take time out for fun, find a friend, and

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

take a movement break that helps you express yourself! All of this will give you the energy you need to be powerful! It’s up to you to commit to Dancing in the Rain to be Unstoppable. Our Unstoppable Woman team is here to help you create new patterns of expressive prosperity! Join Dr. Pam Denton and Hillary Welles for a SuperCORE Positive Motivation Class www.supercorefit.com/fitnessclasses and find out what positive expression can do for you! Thank you to Katrina L. Grady KLBrandStoryography for the amazing photos.

Look, Feel & Live YOUR BEST LIFE

Consultations for Your Best Body & Life with Dr. Pam Denton www.supercorefit.com www.seacretdirect.com/drpamdenton

{ {VOICES FOR IMPACT SHIFT+CONTROL } }

MADE IN THE CUSE BY DANIELLE MENSING

Voices For Impact is a podcast I started to help people thrive by creating content that encourages a growth mindset and reimagines how people can find their purpose. Started during the Covid-19 pandemic and Made in ‘Cuse, Voices For Impact gives people tips on overcoming challenges and keeping a positive mindset by sharing real stories of leaders in our local community and from around the world that have made significant accomplishments in their lives and have gone through their own adversities but have made it through those challenges and made positive im-pacts through their work. Voices For Impact is full of conversations with entrepreneurs, artists, educators, athletes and change-makers. They are people who have built a business, started a movement, or impacted communities. How do you define success? That is the question I usually end with on all of my podcast episodes. I end with this question because I always get a heartfelt and inspiring response. While all responses from the podcast guests are different the majority have been centered around a com-mon theme: Success means finding your own happiness. Cliche, I know but let me dive a little deeper. What is success? When we talk about “successful” people, we usually think about a billionaire, a famous singer, or prominent historical figure. But for the 100

guests on my podcast, most have said that power, fame, fortune are not what makes them feel accomplished. So if you are chasing after your own version of success, let me share with you some wisdom I’ve learned from

check out his movie ‘Dwelling’ on amazon prime): “Nobody can dictate what success is for you, you create your own success”. During our episode, he talks about his journey to directing and writing his first movie. Setting goals until you get to where you want to be. It is important to remember that there is no right way to define success. Based on our own unique experiences and values we will all define success differently. Finding fulfillment is another definition of success that multiple Voices For Impact thought lead-ers have mentioned. Being at peace and alignment with your life and what you are meant to do. There are so many pressures, challenges, stressors, and choices we face on the journey to creating the life we want to live. Life is filled with ups and downs and lots of tears and laughter. Creating inner peace and alignment with yourself is something we all have to put energy towards in order to live a successful life.

interviewing local and globally recognized thought leaders on my podcast, Voices For Impact.

When I asked my first celebrity guest, Latavius Murray, his definition of success was: Overcom-ing Fear. Tay said he had been waiting for someone to ask that question so he could give his advice. When you are fearful of whatever it may be—it can hold you back from making your dreams or goals a reality. Overcome those fears!

The first piece of advice is from Kyle Mecca (local film writer and director,

For other Voices For Impact thought leaders the definition of success has

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

101

SHIFT+CONTROL { {VOICES OF IMPACT} } “What you use to value as a “successful life” in your teens and 20s could be way different for you now.”

changed as well. What you use to value as a “successful life” in your teens and 20s could be way different for you now. Amanda Hughes, owner of The Ice Cream Stand and Jaynes Collective in downtown Syracuse, said that her definition of success is a combination of many factors but she narrowed it down to three main points: happiness, health and helping. Am I happy? Can I do things that I want to do and am I caring for myself? How am I helping or being of service? Ryan Martin, NWBA Player and Founder of the Ryan Martin Foundation expressed that success to him means, “helping to better other peoples situations as opposed to capitalizing on your own good fortune”. Arielle Chambers, model and sports journalist, made similar comments regarding her definition of success. Ari defined success as giving back by sharing and offering success to others so that they can achieve their goals too. Leadership and business coach, Mike Sgro’s definition of success really hit home to me: “If today was my last day, did I do all the things I said I was going to do and did I do it in love.”

102

Success feels and looks different for every single person. It’s not a destination but an ever-evolving journey. I think the common theme I see with all of their

means achieving what YOU want and your purpose. I hope you feel motivated to take on the day after reading this article and for more daily inspiration and teachings listen to Voices For Impact on the go on Apple, Spotify, and iHeart Radio podcast platforms. Subscribe and stay connected on Instagram, Facebook, YouTube and LinkedIn @ VoicesForImpact. Look for this column in future issues of CNY Woman and Rochester Woman Online Magazine. Want to ADVERTISE? Email voices4impactcuse@ gmail.com if you would like to get your mes-sage out to a new audience by sponsoring an episode or sharing your story to help encourage people to find their passion and purpose.

definitions of success is that they are designing their own lives based on what they want, not what others think they should do. So perhaps “success” simply

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

Danielle is a Nazareth College alum and is currently pursuing her MBA. Currently she works as the Senior Director of Development for a local nonprofit. In addition, she volunteers for several organizations in the community and is a Board Member for Association for Fundraising Profes-sionals and a Central New York Business Journal’s 40 Under Forty honoree.

SAVE TH

SEPTEMB

FOR ANN

HELP THE ONE IN SEVEN IN THE SYRACUS

10AM-2PM VENDOR & FASHION SHOW AT THE MOHEGAN MANOR I BALD CONTACT US TODAY FOR MORE INFORMATION AT 585.727.9120 I EMAIL N

HE DATE

BER 26, 2021

R THE NUAL

SE REGION AT RISK FOR KIDNEY DISEASE.

DWINSVILLE, NY I SPONSORS/VENDORS/MODELS NOW BEING ACCEPTED NETWORKROCQUEEN@GMAIL.COM OR SHARON@HEALTHYKIDNEYS.ORG

online

SPECIAL INSERT WOMEN OWNED BUSINESSES

FEATURING:

- COVER STORY: MICHELLE DARIN - TEARNEYâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S KARATE - THE BEAUTY ROOM - BEAUTIFY ME - TALENA SKYE - KEFI MARKETING - NOT BLENDED - MARY ALICE - JOKELE BEAUTY AND MORE!

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

107

{ SHE HUSTLES TALKS }

110

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ {SHE HUSTLES TALKS } }} HUSTLES TALKS { SHE SHIFT+CONTROL

MICHELLE DARIN BY MICHELLE DARIN

My name is Michelle DaRin and I run Michelle DaRin Jewelry, a fashion company that sells my handmade jewelry, clothing, and women’s accessories. I am a New York City native who has called Syracuse home since I was an undergraduate in the 1990s. Recently, I was invited to be featured in CNY Woman Magazine by some fabulous women who love to support local female entrepreneurs in business. It got me thinking about “local” and how the pandemic has really emphasized how important local is and how much our community means to us. Michelle DaRin Jewelry has benefited from the CNY local community in many ways for a long time. We have had excellent sales in upstate New York and enjoyed a regular client base and following. Additionally, the local press has been congenial and the retail stores, Cazenovia Jewelry and Heidi Boutique, that we partner with, have been supportive and boosted our profile. MDJ has a long history in CNY and it has grown in numerous ways. Thinking outside the box with my designs and with our business model

always moves us forward. A few years ago, we took a chance and auditioned for Shark Tank and we made it to the second round. Unfortunately, we did not make it to the show. However, it was a positive experience and it motivated us to keep going. I’m not saying there weren’t any tears and I

wasn’t disappointed but we learned a lot and used that new knowledge to improve and grow our business. That experience opened us up to the idea of looking locally and partnering with Cazenovia Jewelry. It has been fruitful and Ralph Monaforte, of Caz Jewelry, has put up a highly visible

billboard three years in a row during the holiday season! That exposure has been priceless. Additionally, our participation in the ever local Syracuse Fashion Week has been beneficial for exposure and sales as well. Before COVID-19, I questioned if I should have ever left NYC and wondered where my business might be if I stayed there. Now, I am super grateful to live on 8 acres in beautiful Central NY. I work from home, which I always knew was a blessing, but with COVID-19, I realize more than ever how my work is an extension of every facet of my life. It is my lifestyle, it is how I live. Whatever I am thinking about shows up in my work. It’s how I process and reflect on what I am feeling internally. How lucky am I? Most people don’t get to have their life’s work be their expression and catharsis. Times are uncertain but my people have shown up. My husband James, who is also my business partner, is tirelessly building me a new studio where we plan to host art and music events just like we did when I was in graduate school at Syracuse University

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

111

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

“Whatever I am thinking about shows up in my work. It’s how I process and reflect on what I am feeling internally. How lucky am I? Most people don’t get to have their life’s work be their expression and catharsis.”

112

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

114

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

SHIFT+CONTROL {{ SHE HUSTLES TALKS}} “Before COVID-19, I questioned if I should have ever left NYC and wondered where my business might be if I stayed there. Now, I am super grateful to live on 8 acres in beautiful Central NY”

hosting art and music events. Back then, I would bring the art, my husband would bring the music and people would buy my work. It was a lightbulb moment. After I received an MFA in Metalsmithing and an MS in Art Education the goal was to get a stable teaching job, but instead, I went with my dream. My heart was in creating and I was fortunate enough to run with it with the support of a loving husband who had a steady paycheck. The result has been a winding and twisty road with many ups and downs with much success.

We did every show we could squeeze in and travelled throughout New York to get our name out there and build our brand, Michelle DaRin Jewelry. Before the pandemic, we had already been talking about scaling back our participation in the art and craft show circuit and focusing on more online sales and retailers. Poetically, at the last show we did, our tent got caught in a microburst and ended up in pieces looking like a bunch of chopsticks. We never bought another tent and we don’t plan on it. Our

business model has changed and we are focusing on virtual jewelry trunk shows where I get to present some cool original jewels and my husband James can let his comedic light shine. Who knows what our new world will look like? For now, shopping from home keeps everyone safe and affords us much freedom for me to explore new original ideas in jewelry and accessories and new ways for us to grow our business.

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

115

{{ { SHE HUSTLES SHE HUSTLES TALKS TALKS}}} SHIFT+CONTROL “Before the pandemic, we had already been talking about scaling back our participation in the art and craft show circuit and focusing on more online sales and retailers”

116

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Our business model has changed and we are focusing on virtual jewelry trunk shows where I get to present some cool original jewels and my husband James can let his comedic light shine. Who knows what our new world will look like?â&#x20AC;?

{ SHE HUSTLES TALKS }

120

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ {SHE SHEHUSTLES HUSTLESTALKS TALKS} }

BEAUTIFY ME Hello Central New York! My name is Gabriella Rose, owner of BeautifyMe. As an experienced and educated expert in all things beauty, I specialize in skincare, lashes, brows, and makeup with NYS certifications as a Skincare Specialist, Lash Tech, Brow Tech & Cosmetologist. I am very appreciative and excited to be introduced to this amazing magazine as the next Beauty columnist and expert. As a beauty artist having worked all over NYS, I am excited to share my experience with you. From doing event makeup for charity shows such as Stitched Fashion that gives back to the Ronald McDonald House to bridal makeup, to taking part in the world-famous NYC Fashion Week. I guess you can say I travel quite a bit. Another one of my passions! My beauty artistry doesn’t stop there. I specialize in all types of makeup such as bridal, event artistry, and fashion makeup as well as skin care, lashes, and brows. Let me tell you my story and a little bit about myself (or a lot). I am a traveling artist and the founder of “BeautifyMe.” I’ve been in the industry for over 5 years now and decided to start my own business about 2 years ago. Since then, I have become a published makeup artist and have done work for many designers at New York Fashion Week. How and why did I choose my business name? It represents what I

do, I beautify! More importantly, I beautify you! Doing what I do allows me to help my clients with having the confidence they deserve. My goal for each of my clients is to enhance the beauty outside by understanding the beauty inside. To enhance your natural beauty. To Beautify! I love advising clients with beauty tips for their everyday look or making them feel like royalty on their wedding day or simply teaching the application of falsies. Trust me it’s harder than it looks and YouTubers definitely make it seem like a piece of cake! I grew up in Guilderland, NY playing around with glitter, cheap makeup, bright lipstick, and EVERYTHING pink, until I was old enough to try my mothers makeup and learned by practicing. I was nowhere near decent. Youtube was JUST beginning to be popular with videos and influencers aside from funny cat videos. I was one of those girls with the ‘box brow’ phase, after my super thin eyebrow look phase. It took me a couple of years to finally do brows correctly. Growing up I had a favorite store… or should I say dream salon. Club Libby Lu. I want to thank that place for inspiring me. I went to Cosmetology School for Makeup. I went to SkinCare School for Skin, and took classes to become a Certified Brow and Lash Artist. Makeup artists today work in two industries... cosmetic or fashion makeup and FX or film makeup. I have previously worked with couture designers, models, artists,

photographers, videographers, bridal parties and fashion shows. Some of my work has been published on the web or fashion and life magazines. You can find my published work on the Syracuse Fashion Weekend Website or the Saratoga Living Magazine. What excites me the most about doing what I do is the huge difference a simple touch of concealer or brow gel can make and the confidence it reflects afterwards. As an artist, I feel it is very important with each client to listen, discuss, and understand. It is crucial for me to always be up to date on what the current trends are in the beauty industry. Even with the experience I have, I learn every single day. There are millions of people in this world and each person was born different. Diversity and creation are beautiful, and with the people I have met throughout it all are a huge part of my inspiration. There is always something new and/ or different that might be introduced by someone’s creativity. You might try that new trend, and then come up with additional ideas to make that creativity something bigger. That is art. You can add on, you can take away, you can change, or you can keep it original. No matter what, it’s beautiful. Models, Celebrities, Movie Directors, whoever an artist works for, depend on their favorite makeup artists for their expected look for appearances, and shoots. Beautiful makeup applications start off with having beautiful skin. A lot of people can’t stand their skin, and that is

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

122

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

123

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

124

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

SHIFT+CONTROL {{ SHE HUSTLES TALKS}}

“I am here to share my knowledge, experience, and appreciation with you.”

s because they don’t understand their skin. My job is to help. Prep, prime, and finish. You want to follow a simple skin care regimen that’s personalized for your skin type and skin needs. Whether you have oily skin, aging skin, dry skin, or even normal skin, including conditions like rosacea, eczema, acne, hyperpigmentation… there is always something out there for you.

I can share with you about this topic is to think of your skincare as a percentage of 100%. Say you go to a Medical Spa and see an Esthetician who performs monthly chemical peels, IPL, or even microneedling services. As an Esthetician, I can tell you the services I do to you only takes up 20% of your skincare. The other 80% symbolizes your at home

I am here to share my knowledge, experience, and appreciation with you. The most common question about SkinCare that I get asked about are recommendations for products. What brands? What product for this concern? What product for that concern? My go to answer is no matter what skin type you have, and skin condition there is, always use Medical SkinCare Products. The advantage you will see and will experience compared to regular cosmetic skincare products are faster and stronger results. It’s well worth the price when you receive actual results instead of buying a product that just smells or feels good. Every client is different. One client can have oily, acneic skin that is very dry and flakey, while another client has normal skin with hyperpigmentation and rosacea. The most important knowledge

skincare regimen that you have to follow morning and night. Although it sounds like a lot, it can be something very simple. All you need is dedication. Your dedication will pay off and uncover beautiful, raw, healthy skin. Performing all of the services I do, and changing skin that screams for help along with creating my artwork on a beautiful canvas, is my career. Right now I stick

to my short term goals and aim for my long term goals. Opening my own studio where our priority is our clients. Everyone is welcome and taken care of luxuriously and comfortably. A place where you can come get ready for your first date, or your wedding day. You walk in excited with expectations and with the spin of a chair, you walk out a Queen. Head to toe, the canvas is shining. This is my business, BeautifyMe. As an artist and the founder of BeautifyMe, I am here to service all your beauty needs and wants. If you’re looking for special occasion makeup for any event, headshots, photoshoots, or fashion shows... book me as your makeup artist. Do you have skin concerns? Anti-aging, dry skin, or breakouts? Book me for a microdermabrasion. Do you need better brows or lifted lashes? My station is set. BeautifyMe is here to Beautify YOU. For more information, or to contact me please visit @beautifyme247 on Instagram and Facebook or my email is gfrose12@gmail.com

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

125

{ SHE HUSTLES TALKS }

126

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ {SHE SHEHUSTLES HUSTLESTALKS TALKS} }

TEARNEY’S KARATE BY ALEXIS TEARNEY KUHL

Hi! my name is Alexis Tearney Kuhl and I am the second generation owner of Tearney’s Martial Arts. You may have heard of our school. It began in 1969 under my parents, Greg and Judy Tearney, 10th degree Black Belts. In 1986, my parents moved our family and the business to the Camillus/ Fairmount area. It was one of the best decisions they could ever have made. Over the years they have taught, motivated, and helped thousands of students. It has always been their goal to teach the highest quality in martial arts, while helping students develop life skills that would impact their lives for the better. Through my parents’ dedication, motivation, and resilience, Tearney’s became the powerhouse dojo that it became. Having had the experience of growing up in the family business, it was only natural that I would train, compete, and eventually teach and learn the business. I had my moments of wanting to be like a “normal family”. When other kids heard my last name, they always brought up karate, my family, or would say something like “oh, so you can probably kick my butt”. As a shy, conscientious, and self aware child, this kind of attention grew old. When people saw me in the dojo, they often referred to me as “the daughter”, as opposed to just Alexis. A lot of people would assume things about me due to my parents success. Some assumed that I must be spoiled.

Many people mistook my shy nature for being stuck up. They saw my high achieving nature and assumed I must think highly of myself, when it was actually quite the opposite. I work very hard because I am never satisfied with myself. This feeling of being unaccepted and misunderstood often drove me to resent the dojo. I would need breaks

from the training, in order to find my own path and my own true self. As I became a young adult, I realized that having this type of family business was a true blessing. There are very few occupations where you can have the kind of satisfaction that this provides. We get to help, motivate, and inspire people to be better and achieve more. The gratitude from parents and students is what keeps us going. I soon became a full time instructor in the dojo, and I

am now a 5th degree Black Belt. My students have valued me as a caring, motivating, and detail oriented teacher. I’ve enjoyed many satisfying years helping children and adults in the dojo. I’ve cared for the kids as if they were my own. Many of my adult students have become great friends. Helping people is something I am passionate about. On March 14, 2020, it was a typical Saturday morning. I finished teaching my last class of the week, and we were aware of the concerns with Covid. That was the last class I physically taught at our beautiful dojo on Milton Avenue in Camillus. On that following Monday, New York state shut down all nonessential businesses. The weeks turned into months, and the rent owed began to accumulate. No one expected this to drag on as long as it did. Without revenue in a business, bills can’t simply pay for themselves. My parents had been deliberating retirement for awhile. It became clear that it was time to step away and dissolve the corporation. Also during thus time, we were dealing with my dad’s new cancer diagnosis. They stumbled across a very aggressive bladder cancer, during a routine screening for something else. This made the decision even easier. When serious illness strikes, it makes one realize how fleeting life really is. Like many others, this year has been the most stressful, uncertain, and trying time of my life. It is a daily struggle to forge ahead and the weight and

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

127

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

128

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

HUSTLES TALKS } } } { {IN HER OWN WORDS { SHE SHIFT+CONTROL “Having had the experience of growing up in the family business, it was only natural that I would train, compete, and eventually teach and learn the business. I had my moments of wanting to be like a “normal family”.”

burden I feel is tremendous. It’s a lonely journey. Having lost the one constant in my life - my family’s business, feels like the death of loved one. Due to the uncertainty d u r i n g quarantine, my husband and I opened an e-commerce vintage clothing store and named it Lhük Vintage. Shortly after, I decided to continue my family legacy and file for another new business license Tearney’s Martial Arts, LLC. Since establishment, I have been teaching live, online virtual classes in karate and kickboxing. I am able to provide training, exercise, and valuable character development. I have become very active with our social media pages. Without a physical location, it’s the only way that I can remain seen and relevant. My posts are all about

motivating, helping and inspiring. So many people are struggling with what’s going on in the world. Depression and anxiety rates are through the roof. Alcohol and drug consumption are up. Quarantine weight gain is real.

We need hope. We need positivity. We need a light at the end of this tunnel. And even though I am in the thick of this mess, I promise to remain a positive light for those who need i t . Te a r n e y’s Martial Arts will come back. It may exist virtually for now, but I am actively seeking a new home for our school. And when we get to other side of 2020, we will be so much stronger for it. I hope that you will follow and support my journey on Facebook and Instagram - @ tearneysma. I promise to be a constant source of positivity and authentic motivation. Thank you for reading my story. I appreciate you.

Unemployment is unlike anything we have ever seen, as entire industries get wiped out. If you haven’t been laid off, maybe your hours have been cut. If it hasn’t happened to you, it’s happening to someone you know.

Best Regards and Love, Renshi Alexis Tearney Kuhl

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

129

{{ { SHE HUSTLES SHE HUSTLES TALKS TALKS }}} SHIFT+CONTROL “We get to help, motivate, and inspire people to be better and achieve more. The gratitude from parents and students is what keeps us going.“

130

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHE HUSTLES TALKS }

132

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHE HUSTLES TALKS }

TALENA SKYE Cherese “Talena Skye” Bracey is God’s daughter, and a princess of the King she unapologetically declares. Born in Manhattan and raised in Jersey City, the chilltown native is on a mission to set the captives free. Some refer to Talena Skye as a lyrical preacher as she raps the gospel while delivering her messages in a bold authoritative way.

Skye’s childhood wasn’t a happy one, lost from an environment that was uncertain from day to day. She struggled with rejection as she cried out for help and rescue from the life she so desperately wanted to escape from to no avail. In danger of being taken from her mom and put in foster care, she felt terrified and alone. No family wanted to get involved with dealing with the domestic

Talena Skye (pronounced Ta-lay-na) chose this as her artist name as a rebirth of a new beginning from a life filled with many dark days. She adds “Skye” to her name as a reminder to always keep her head towards the sky looking to God for help through trials and tribulations. She overcame many struggles as a child and is a survivor of domestic violence. As a child she would escape the cold atmosphere around her by writing songs and losing herself in storybooks. Storybooks were a way of escape from the real world. It allowed her to imagine a fun world away from her own, while helping her to use her imagination. “Alcoholism is a disease that many don’t believe can harm the self esteem and life of a child. It can be a vehicle used by hell to drive through the doorway of a person’s spirit that can cause destruction.” says Talena. She suffered much physical abuse at the hands of her father who himself was struggling with inner turmoils. Talena

situation she and her mom endured. They felt alone and discouraged. Talena was the tender age of 9 years old. A little girl broken hearted and void of trust from adults around her whom she thought would love and protect her. The rejection opened doors to more sadness and feelings of despair from both her mom and daughter. Talena Skye prayed a child’s prayer that God would protect

her and keep her safe. She was able to stay with her mom through intervention although she didn’t feel loved by many close to her. “God will send his angels to watch over you in your most trying times,” said Talena. She received counseling and found emotional comfort from an aunt whom she grew close to during her darkest days. Her mom 10 years later gave birth to her brother. Life wasn’t a bed of roses as she struggled with the idea of her dad still being in her life whom she resented for many years. As a teen, she had to care for her younger brother, as her mom and main bread winner would work two jobs two provide a life for her children the best way she could. Her dad still struggling with his addiction tried best to provide but the disease of alcoholism drove him deeper down a path of destruction that which lead him to be become void of a normal fatherhood. His addiction and abusive reign came to a halt as he suffered a stroke that nearly left him completely disabled. She credits God, counseling, and her mom’s sister who was away at college during most of the turmoil for saving her throughout her troubling adolescent years.

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

133

PHOTO BY @35MMSEE-IG

{{ { SHE HUSTLES SHE HUSTLES TALKS TALKS }}} SHIFT+CONTROL “Talena Skye (pronounced Ta-lay-na) chose this as her artist name as a rebirth of a new beginning from a life filled with many dark days.“

Her aunt made sure she knew God’s love for her while sharing the word of God. It was those seeds planted in her heart for Jesus at such a young age that she would never let go. While attending a church one day at the age of 12, she heard the Pastor say, “Invite Jesus into your heart and He will save you and never leave you.” It was that moment she realized she wanted Jesus to live in her heart to protect her. She became born again and made Jesus the Lord of her life. However things wasn’t always what she expected. The troubles in her life began to increase as she got older causing her to question God’s love for her. In 1993 she became really sick and developed a brain tumor in the middle of her brain. It was cancer free but the tumor almost left her blind. She had surgery through a transphenoidal procedure done by cutting a passage under the upper lip then making an incision in the back of the nose to insert an instrument that would remove the tumor. The surgery was a crucial one that took 6 hours. However, Talena Skye trusted God and stayed in faith as God guided the hands of the doctors to success. In the winter of 1994 she was the victim of a hit and run car accident. “As I was riding in the car with my head on the glass napping, I heard a voice say...”pick up your head” as I looked up, a white car came straight toward me. I jumped quickly and closely to the side of the driver as the door on my side, the upfront passenger side, was hit and smashed all the way to the driver side. The impact hit my back a bit and the entire window 136

glass was broken out all over my head as I sat frozen with my head down. I walked away with no scratch, or bruises just a little out of breath from the door’s impact, explained Talena. “I didn’t have my seat belt on cause I had taken it off because it was too tight from my coat and needed to breath a minute. Although I know seat belts save lives, that time not having one on saved mine because I was able to jump from my seat fast. Jesus saved my life!! I am so grateful to be alive.” said Talena Skye In 1995 she met her soul mate who later became her husband. The introduction was made by a co worker and cousin of her new guy during her time of transition from a very bad relationship from where she was a victim of emotional abuse, cheating and mistrust from a boyfriend she dated and saw a way of escape from her environment. Things weren’t what she thought and and as she tried to break it off, he showed her a gun to scare her not to leave the relationship. Although she didn’t feel threatened, he continued to pursue her. She was stalked many times but one day he appeared peaceful, nice, and apologetic and decided to have a conversation while offering a ride to work one morning. She was tricked and briefly kidnapped which made her late as co workers questioned her whereabouts. It was storming rain with nothing around her but dumpsters and seclusion as they began to fight. He threatened to smash her head through the window glass as she began a fighting struggle screaming Jesus over and over again. The struggle eventually stopped and the ex looking very disturbed started the car and drove her to work and

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

dropped her off. Too shaken by the event she collected herself and began her day at work without saying a word. One month later she met Taji Bracey on Christmas day who became the love of her life and biggest supporter and fan. They married on Sept 4th 1999. The two recently celebrated their 20th wedding anniversary and will be celebrating another special anniversary of 25 years together this Christmas of 2020. She attended a community college and received credentials to began a career in early childhood of almost 30 years, teaching children how to have positive self esteem and how to be the best they can be. Her mission is teaching children in a fun and exciting way that helps them succeed. In 2005 she founded The Reesie Reader and Bookie literacy Club and created the character mascots, “Reesie Reader (the girl who loves to read) & Bookie (the king of book world). The literacy club gave close to 10,000 storybook donations to kids who needed them the most, helping them to make friends with books. In 2009, she started her own business Reading Reaps Rewards Early Childhood Enrichment program. The program teaches children how to read while building learning activities around books for enrichment. She is the author of 3 childrens books and was given the opportunity to meet Tory Burch at an entrepreneur womens mentoring event. Tory purchased copies of her first book “Storytime Friends” to give to children during a Christmas

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

138

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ { SHE HUSTLES TALKS } } SHIFT+CONTROL “Alcoholism is a disease that many don’t believe can harm the self esteem and life of a child. It can be a vehicle used by hell to drive through the doorway of a person’s spirit that can cause destruction.”

event. She is currently seeking to make her books into animation film. Her third book Reesie Reader Little Entrepreneur teaches kids gems of becoming an entrepreneur. She wrote and produced a kids song that’s featured in the book called “Storytime Friends” that was sung by her cousins the The Storytime Friends Crew, who were 7, 8, and 12 at the time of production. The crew sang for children and promoted the importance of reading and being the best you can be. They are all grown up now as successful wonderful young adults today. She became a certified kids music and movement Instructor from Kindermusik University, and operates a program through her own business Reading Reaps Rewards presents Kindermusik. Kindermusik International, Inc is a world leading method of early childhood education and is one of the most widely recognized music and movement programs for young children. In 2010, she attended and graduated from Rising Tide Capital Business Academy for entrepreneurs. In 2012 she entered a New Jersey statewide business competition for Reading Reaps Rewards run by Rising Tide Capital Business Academy, and became a top ten finalist from 80 plus contestants. Victor Cruz, a former NY Giant attended the event.

Today, Talena Skye is on a journey praising God from a place of victory through all life has sent and sends her way. In 2016 she lost her mom to cancer and wrote a song titled “Mama” as a tribute to her. The song also features Be Cleare Allen who also lost her mom to cancer and contributed a poem to her mom used in the song “Raw Blue Hue” After Talena’s mom’s death, she was left to

care for her dad who suffered a stroke a few years ago. Her mom was his caregiver has gone home to be with the Lord and responsibility and care is now left in her and her brothers hands. Although Talena Skye didn’t have a good relationship with Her dad , she walks the path of forgiveness and cares for her dad’s well being and security. He is now a born again believer in Jesus, alcohol free and living a life of peace despite being lonely without his wife, the only person who cared for him despite his battles and understood his struggles.

“Its funny how life works but God has a plan and I trust Him.” says Talena Skye. Talena Skye is also a voice over talent, making people laugh with many character style voices from men and womens voices in the style of Egyptian, Italian, Spanish, African and Indian to many kid styles. Talena Skye is no stranger to struggle, hard work and perseverance. Today, she continues to teach children while ministering hope, authority and faith to others using the gifts God gave her. Talena is not ashamed to be radical for Christ as she boldly states in her newest release “Something 2 Say” which was inspired by world events that sparked the strong lyrics igniting a fuse toward the kingdom of darkness. Her new EP soon to be released is called “Arise” inspired by the scripture Isaiah 60. You can find Talena Skye’s music online. Her childrens books by Cherese Bracey are also available online for purchase. Also, check out her video “What is Faith?” on YouTube. To learn more about her business, visit www.readingreapsrewards.org. @ readingreapsrewards IG Facebook Please follow her on @ talenaskyeinstagram and visit www.talenaskye.org for new and upcomingmusic...Stay tuned!

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

139

{{ SHE HUSTLES TALKS} } SHIFT+CONTROL

140

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{{ SHE HUSTLES TALKS} } SHIFT+CONTROL

CHERESE T. BRACEY BY TALENA SKYE

Meet Cherese T. Bracey founder and CEO of Reading Reaps Rewards Early Childhood Enrichment Program. Cherese is an entrepreneur, educator, author, creator and songwriter. She is a domestic violence survivor who overcame many struggles as a child, including a brain tumor that nearly left her blind. As a child, Cherese would use storybooks as a way of escape from troubling times. Reading and writing songs were a way to help spark creativity and help her to cope with feelings of sadness from an uncertain environment. Finding God at an early age of 12, Cherese credits her faith in God for the positive person she is today. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not to your own understanding. Acknowledge Him in all your ways and He will direct your paths,” says Cherese. One of her favorite quotes from Proverbs 3:5-6. Cherese’s mission is helping children succeed by encouraging them to have confidence in learning by making learning fun!

books for enrichment. “Because of the recent pandemic, it makes it hard to run my business originally however, offering programs virtually may be a challenge but it helps me reach more children abroad,” says Cherese.

Today she is the founder of The Reesie Reader and Bookie literacy Club for kids and created the character mascots, “Reesie Reader (the girl who loves to read) & Bookie (the king of book world). The literacy club gave close to 10,000 storybook donations since it’s inception in 2005, to kids who needed them the most, helping them to make friends with books. In 2009, she started her own business Reading Reaps Rewards Early Childhood Enrichment program. The program teaches children how to read while building learning activities around

The crew sang for children and promoted the importance of reading and being the best you can be. They are all grown up now as successfulom wonderful young adults today.

She is the author of 3 childrens books “Story Time Friends”, “The Case of The Withering Books” and “Reesie Reader Little Entrepreneur” She was given the opportunity to meet Tory Burch at an entrepreneur womens mentoring event. Tory purchased copies of her first book “Storytime Friends” to give to children during a Christmas event. Her third book “Reesie Reader Little Entrepreneur” teaches children the gems of becoming an entrepreneur. She wrote and produced a kids song that’s featured in the book called “Storytime Friends” that was sung by her cousins, The Story Time Friends Crew, who were very young at the time of production at ages 7, 8, and 12.

Cherese loves performing puppet shows for kids using various voice overs to bring laughter to little faces and families. Her fun learning approach helps children love to learn by creating a happy laughable way to learn. She became a certified kids music and movement Instructor from

Kindermusik University, and operates a program through her own business Reading Reaps Rewards presents Kindermusik. Kindermusik International, Inc is a world leading method of early childhood education and is one of the most widely recognized music and movement programs for young children. In 2010, She attended and graduated from Rising Tide Capital Business Academy for entrepreneurs. In 2012 she entered a New Jersey statewide business competition for her program, Reading Reaps Rewards. The competition was run and held by Rising Tide Capital Community Business Academy and was it’s first competition of which she became a top ten finalist from 80 plus contestants. Victor Cruz, a former NY Giant attended the event. Cherese is no stranger to struggle, hard work and perseverance. Today, she continues to teach children while ministering hope and faith to others using the gifts God gave her. Her childrens books are available at the Jersey City Public Library and is available online for purchase. To learn more about her business, visit www.readingreapsrewards.org. Like her page on Facebook. Follow her on @ReadingReapsRewards Instagram.

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

141

SHIFT+CONTROL {{ SHE HUSTLES TALKS}} “Cherese is no stranger to struggle, hard work and perseverance. Today, she continues to teach children while ministering hope, authority and faith to others using the gifts God gave her.”

142

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHE HUSTLES TALKS }

THE BEAUTY ROOM BY CNY WOMAN ONLINE

Rewind to April 2020; Smack dab in the middle of the Coronavirus pandemic. All non-essential businesses have been closed until further notice. Emily Speers, professional hairstylist, had not been able to work in the salon since the end of April. Ten weeks of being closed and suddenly, we get the word that salons are able to re-open. But, Emily’s salon that she worked in for several years folded in the midst of the pandemic. The Owner decided it wasn’t in her cards to own the salon anymore. And just then, the opportunity of a lifetime fell into Emily’s lap...to become a salon owner. The previous owner of the salon, which is now known as “The Beauty Room”, handed over the salon to Emily to help her succeed in her dreams of being a salon business owner. Emily was nervous and optimistic about taking over a business at the age of 24, and not to mention during a global pandemic. She said to herself several times throughout the process, “Am i crazy for opening a business during a global pandemic?”. But, she continued to move forward and put those thoughts to the back of her mind knowing that it would all 144

work out, and with the help of her family and friends, she would thrive. Fast-forward to present. Emily has been the proud owner of “The Beauty Room” located at 33 Oswego Street in Baldwinsville, New York since June 2020 and is not looking back. Business is booming and she is beyond blessed to have been given this opportunity.

Since opening, she has been working on remodeling the space to make it her own, and has also added an esthetician and another hair stylist to her salon. Emily says she enjoys “building relationships with clients and offering a space where they can come unwind and relax while they receive their services. It’s something everyone looks forward to when coming to the salon; to be able to let their hair down and know they are

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

going to leave feeling refreshed and beautiful.” Emily hopes to continue to grow the salon and continue making her vision a reality. Since Emily was a child, she knew she wanted to be a hairstylist. Once she graduated from Baldwinsville’s C.W. Baker High School in 2013, Emily pursued her education at “Continental School of Beauty” where she graduated in 2014 and became a licensed cosmetologist after passing her New York State Boards. Emily is always continuing her education by attending hair shows and taking educational classes online. She strives to stay up to date on current hair trends and techniques to keep her clients looking stylish and making them look and feel their best. “The Beauty Room” offers a variety of services from hair cutting, coloring, wedding and formal hair, waxing, facials, etc. You can find them and their full list of services on Facebook, Instagram and Google under “The Beauty Room”. Appointments can be booked by contacting Emily at 315-857-6909.

{ RECOVERX }

AJ EXCURSIONS

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

145

146

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

147

HUSTLES TALKS } } { {INSHE HER OWN WORDS “Ten weeks of being closed and suddenly, we get the word that salons are able to reopen. But, Emily’s salon that she worked in for several years folded in the midst of the pandemic.”

148

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

STARTING DECEMBER 1ST WE A TRY THEM ALL AND RECEIV

BALDWINSVILLE, NY I WWW.NUTRIT NUTRITIONFIXN

ARE LAUNCHING SANTAâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S CREW! VE A SPECIAL GIFT FROM US

TIONFIXNY.COM/ I (315) 870-1100 NY@GMAIL.COM

{ SHE HUSTLES TALKS }

KEFI MARKETING BY KATINA KARL

“Putting Heart, Kindness, Positivity and Success Into Marketing Campaigns” “Our goal is to bring great success to our clients by creating meaningful, fun, exciting marketing campaigns, full of heart. We may be a small marketing company, but we have a big impact on everything we are a part of. When we say, we’ve got this, we promise you, we do.” – Katina Karl, Owner My name is Katina Karl and I am the owner of Kefi Marketing in Liverpool, NY. A marketing agency that helps businesses with their marketing, from social media to media buying/ paid social, as well as public relations. At Kefi Marketing we pride ourselves on putting positivity, kindness, heart and success into everything we do. I spent over two decades in the corporate world from Long Island, NY to South Florida. I learned from very early on, if there’s something you want in life you needed to work hard for it. I come from a family background of small business owners. I was always determined to one day make a statement of my own. In 2018, Kefi Marketing was born. Kefi is a beautiful Greek word that means full of life, joy, excitement and so much more. It’s almost hard to even define the feeling and word Kefi (Kef-ee). I wanted something that was true to my Greek 152

heritage and to honor my mom at the same time. I lost my mom in 2015 after a battle with Neuroendocrine cancer. I put everything on hold to be her full-time caregiver at the time. I also left South Florida to move to Binghamton, NY to be closer to family and to start over by going back to school, while working, both full-time. At the same time, I met my other half, Tyler, who grew up in

the Baldwinsville, NY area and we have planted roots together in Liverpool, NY with our dog, King Louis. Over the years, I’ve been able to work alongside business owners throughout New York State, making a difference in their businesses with their custom marketing campaigns. I’ve treated every client’s business as if it were my own. What sets Kefi Marketing apart is our passion and partnerships with local

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

nonprofits. Our community is where we call home and it’s important to give back to it. Kefi Marketing has been able to bring good light to the local businesses and the nonprofits we’ve partnered with. I even took on the chairwoman position of Public Relations for the Junior League of Syracuse (The JLS is an organization of diverse women committed to enriching the quality of life for women, children and their families in the Central New York community). Through Kefi Marketing’s continued growth and success with businesses small and large we look forward to creating new jobs in our community through innovation, hard work and dedication. C OV I D - 1 9 h a s changed the way we market. We have had to become virtual in a new way--to create new ways to connect, shop, and interact with customers like never before. We saw business owners having to use social media, in ways some of them may never have used social media before and some did not even have a social platform for their business. Business owners wear enough hats every day; marketing, advertising and social media is a full time job that many of them don’t have the time for. Others try their hand at it and may not see

{ RECOVERX }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

153

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

154

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

“Our goal is to bring great success to our clients by creating meaningful, fun, exciting marketing campaigns, full of heart.”

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

155

{{ { SHE HUSTLES SHE HUSTLES TALKS TALKS SHIFT+CONTROL { RECOVERX } }}} “We may be a small marketing company, but we have a big impact on everything we are a part of. ”

success, because they don’t have the right skills. It’s important to work with a professional team that can understand your business inside and out to come up with the right game plan for success. For example, for one of my clients, we created virtual live events during COVID-19 that had customers tuned in and ready to shop live on Facebook and Instagram each month. Customers were able have a connection with us, which people were craving after being quarantined at home. With the success 156

of our virtual lives and new ways of marketing, that business was able to open a brick and mortar store in the midst of the pandemic. For another business, we created an in person event following COVID-19 guidelines that dedicated a day to offer free car washes for essential employees, first responders and healthcare workers, they were able earn hundreds of new customers and bring good light to the community. It brings me such joy to see the success of a campaign, knowing that we did that,

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

we created that success. At the end of the day, what matters to me the most is that if I was able to help a business or change a life, I know I did my part. Just like Kefi’s marketing motto, I hope I can inspire others out there to be positive, kind and strong. To know that anything in life you dream of is possible, if you work hard. It won’t come easy, you may face adversity on your journey, but keep going. Spread your wings and fly.

{ OSHIFT+CONTROL LOCALLY, W M A N O W N E D A N D O }P E R A T E D

MARKETING, ADVERTISING, PUBLIC RELATIONS & SOCIAL MEDIA MARKETING MARKETING CAMPAIGNS FILLED WITH INNOVATIVE THINKING, SUCCESSFUL MINDSETS, AND CREATIVE SOLUTIONS, ALL WHILE PUTTING KINDNESS, POSITIVITY AND HEART INTO EVERY CAMPAIGN. BRING KEFI MARKETING TO THAT TABLE FOR ALL YOUR MARKETING NEEDS!

New Customers - Set up Fees Waived When You Mention This Ad By 1/31/2021

www.Kefimarketing.com | Liverpool, NY Katina@kefimarketing.com Social: @KefiMarketing

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

157

{ { SHE {HUSTLES SHE HUSTLES ENTREPRENHERS TALKS } }} SHEHUSTLES ENTREPRENHERS

NOT BLENDED Not Blended is an Eco-Friendly clothing company that promotes diversity to show that you do not have to blend to belong. The term Not Blended was created to start a conversation. It was created to have individuals think about their position in society. Many of us fit into many categories and society tries to label us and group us into one category. When you say you are Not Blended you are saying I am me, I have multiple layers. You are saying that you are not going to let society define who you or who you love. In 2018 the CEO and Founder of Not Blended Patrice Edwards studied in Germany and felt like she did not belong. She felt as even though she earned her right to be there, she did not feel welcomed by the other students. She constantly had to be the spokesperson for African Americans, even though she was not American. Many people looked at her and automatically determined who she was and who she should be. Many people were surprised to learn that Patrice immigrated from Trinidad and Tobago and was raised in a Caribbean household. Throughout college, she visited many countries such as China, France, South Korea, Austria, Italy, and many more. While traveling around the world she 158

noticed that many people were not accustomed to being around people of color and did not know how they should act around them. Patrice started to think to herself what if she created a blog where people could share their stories. She wanted people to think about their insecurities and write about them. She wanted people to know that we all

have insecurities and making someone feel insecure about their skin color or who they are is wrong. No one should feel uncomfortable to make you comfortable. Soon many people were sending stories. They shared what

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

they did not like about themselves and why they felt different. By thinking this way many were able to see what it is like to be a person of color. Many people of color spend everyday trying to live in society that is unaccepting to them due to their brown skin. Something that cannot change. As people started to think about their insecurities in this way they started to think differently. It shows that when we stop thinking about ourselves and think about others we see that we are no different. We all have things that make us feel different and we should embrace it. As the blog grew Patrice wanted to start a MOVEMENT and started selling keychain. As keychains were doing well she met her partner Asia Ards who encouraged her to do more to develop a streetwear clothing line. Asia knew what it was like to feel excluded as a black middle eastern who is a lesbian and grew up in a predominately white neighborhood. She felt like she did not belong so she became passionate about Not Blended. She knew that she had to be a part of this movement. With just the two of them as business partners, they were able to create an eco-friendly clothing line that

SHE HUSTLES TALKS } { { SHE ENTREPRENHERS }} SHE{HUSTLES HUSTLES ENTREPRENHERS

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

159

{{{ SHE HUSTLES SHE HUSTLES TALKS TALKS} }} SHIFT+CONTROL “Not Blended is an Eco-Friendly clothing company that promotes diversity to show that you do not have to blend to belong. The term Not Blended was created to start a conversation”

the products are packaged in nontoxic materials such as recyclable boxes and recyclable paper. They make their own clothing tags and pins and try to provide a hands-on experience. Each order is sent with a personal note so that the customer knows that they are happy to have them a part of the Not Blended movement. To reach new customers Not Blended recently has been a part of a couple of local markets and small business events. This gives customers a chance to meet the faces of Not Blended. Our customers not only 160

are our inspiration but our voice and movement. Currently Not Blended focusing on furthering their outreach. They are partnering with other small businesses to expand their brand. They are also going out in the Rochester community and providing food to those in need. Not Blended hopes to eventually start their own scholarship to provide backpacks and school supplies to disadvantaged neighborhoods to help students be successful in school. Not Blended is more than a clothing company it is a safe haven.

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

Currently Asia works hard on running social media such as Instagram and website. She also works hard on creating new designs to help Not Blended expand. Patrice is spending her time getting her Master’s in Marketing and Communication so that she can communicate with her customers effectively. Not Blended hopes to give back to the community to help create a better safe loving environment. Not Blended was created to start a movement to show you do not have to blend to BELONG!

{ SHE HUSTLES TALKS }

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

162

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

163

{ { SHE HUSTLES TALKS } } SHIFT+CONTROL

JOKELE’ Matika “Miss Tika” Goldsmith is a beauty Guru in the making. Born and raised in WNY, Matika found herself captivated by the ability to make women beautiful as early as the age of 8. She would take her barbie dolls and cut their hair into cute styles, even curling them with curling irons making sure not to melt the not so human hair. As time went on she began to practice on herself. Having a mother (Evang. Vicky Canty), as a beautician only fueled the fire for Matika. It pushed her further to become a beautician. By the time she was a freshman in high school Matika had a very steady clientele full of girls and women of all ages. Knowing that her heart was dead set on going to cosmetology school, she ran into a challenge with her mother about her not wanting to attend college as planned. However, with very much consideration and little talk with her grandfather the late Willie Canty Jr, her mother finally agreed. Matika went on to graduated in 1998 from Continental School of Beauty Culture in Buffalo NY. At the tender age of 18, with a 164

temporary license in tow, she was introduced to Monique Winfield whom would not only give Matika he first chance as a professional booth renting hairstylist but she would also become her mentor and a major part of her growth in the beauty industry. With big dreams and aspirations

Matika knew that her drive would take her on a journey to leave her mark in the world. Now a New York State Licensed cosmetologist Matika found herself becoming more and more interested in the makeup part of cosmetology. After being asked to join a team for Mercedes Benz Fashion Week the MUA in her stood at attention. In 2011 Matika would leave the New Revelations nest where she had worked since 1998 and opened

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

Miss Tika Salon of Hair & Beauty located in Lockport Ny. Matika was looking to fill the void, which was a lacking of hairstylists that cater to the Ethnic clientele in that city. From the first day she opened her doors business was amazing. Working sun up to sun down with her team (braider & sister) Larraine Brown and (Barber & Husband) Johnny Goldsmith they were taking over! Through this journey many clients and friendships were formed. They quickly became apart of the community. Back to school givea-ways, Health care outreach, Breast Cancer Awareness are a few of the community events that the Miss Ti k a Sa l o n s t a f f participated in. One day Matka walked into choir rehearsal where she sang first Soprano with the Lighthouse Interdenominational Choir not knowing that she would get the first glance of her happily ever after. As time went on she found herself singing and traveling the country with this oh so handsome man. Becoming friends at first, hanging out, laughing and joking she quickly realized that when he was around so was were the knots in her stomach accompanied by

{ RECOVERX } } { SHIFT+CONTROL

AJ EXCURSIONS

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

165

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

166

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{{{ SHE HUSTLES SHE HUSTLES TALKS TALKS} }} SHIFT+CONTROL “ As a Christian people tend to expect you to be perfect or to always turn the other cheek. That couldn’t be further from the truth.“

accompanied by the determination to be as cute as possible. As time went on they would began dating and in 2003 she became Mrs. Johnny Goldsmith Jr. 1 yr later they welcomed her first born Donovan Lee. He was her Rainbow baby. Johnny and Matika had suffered a loss before this blessing. The loss of their baby would bring them closer than ever. To their surprise Joniya Autumn was on her way 1.5 yrs later. Due to medical complications Matika would find herself on the operating table which would cause the loss of half of her reproductive system. Afraid that more children was only a dream they prayed and believed. God saw them fit for a miracle and Kendall Elise was born. The Goldsmith family was complete... so they thought! In 2016 Matika was forced to close her doors as she embarked on one of the most joyous occasions, the arrival of her baby girl Princess Leila. Due to a very complicated pregnancy Matika became too sick and was unable to perform as the head stylist of her salon. With her dr’s recommendations she was placed on bedrest for the last leg of her pregnancy which was 5 more months. She made the difficult decision to focus on her health and nurturing and delivering a healthy bundle of joy. Leila Lianna Goldsmith entered the world in Sept as healthy as a baby could be. At that moment Matika and her husband knew that they had made the best decision. Afraid of being taken away from her 168

family too soon she decided to pause the reopening of her Salon to focus on being a wife and a mother. Growing up in the church Matika had always known that there was a calling on her life. With a mother as a Evangelist she was very familiar with what this particular calling would cost to fulfill. She ran every which way she could but she was never able to escape what thus said the Lord concerning her mission. Under the leadership of her pastor Bishop James H Bowman she accepted the call to ministry and began to become active in ministry. Matika has accepted several speaking engagements in which she has seen how and what God can do through you if you just simply let God be God. Her faith is one thing that she takes very seriously. After walking away from 2 car wrecks, one which required the jaws of life, she is a FIRM believer that there is nobody greater than the Lord above. “ As a Christian people tend to expect you to be perfect or to always turn the other cheek. That couldn’t be further from the truth. I’m human just like you. I get angry and just might say something that you would not expect but thank God for Jesus! Thank you Jesus for sacrificing your life that I might live again. He loves me enough that he doesnt require me to be him. He requires me to try my best because he already knows that I’ll never be perfect. Now ain’t God good!” Matika is often found saying “ If you do your best, God will do the rest!” That has become a

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

household staple with encouraging her children. Covid 19 being the first pandemic that Matika has lived to see has unfortunately left its ugly mark on her family. Loosing 3 immediate family members and 1 distant, her husband has felt the full weight of the Corona Virus. Again this was a time to totally lean on their faith. Prayers of peace and comfort has helped them through. Even though there were many sad times Matika found that this time was better than ever to dive totally into the development of her Cosmetics line Jokelé Beauty. With the name founded from her 3 daughters Joniya, Kendall & Leila, they have been very involved from picking colors to naming them. This now family business has Launched and is doing better than expected. Its vibrant and nude array of colors of moisturizing lip gloss has left people stunned. The flair in their lashes are very unique and flattering to every eye wearing them. Soon we will be introduced to Jokele Beauty Hair Care. Birthed from her daughters extensive battle with eczema, Matika was determined to create all natural products that would stimulate her daughters hair growth while treating her eczema at the same time. After many many attempts of purchasing products that promised to do but failed, she studied all day and night until she had every piece to the puzzle.

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

169

{{{ SHE HUSTLES SHE SHIFT+CONTROL HUSTLES TALKS TALKS { RECOVERX } }}} “Jokelé Beauty. With the name founded from her 3 daughters Joniya, Kendall & Leila, they have been very involved from picking colors to naming them. This now family business has Launched and is doing better than expected.”

Birthed from her daughters extensive battle with eczema, Matika was determined to create all natural products that would stimulate her daughters hair growth while treating her eczema at the same time. After many many attempts of purchasing products that promised to do but failed, she studied all day and night until she had every piece to the puzzle. 170

With a blend of natural butters and oils she will soon launch Jokelé Beauty ButterCream Hair Butter and the Super Stimulating Hair Growth Oil. Tested and tried it has found to be the next best thing in hair care. With the results that in the matter of 2 months her daughters hair had grown completely back in, she knows that it’s only a matter of time that

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

the rest of the world would agree. Now located in the Boulevard Mall in Amherst Ny Matika is enjoying the sudden expansion of her business. Jokelé Beauty will soon be a household name.

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

JOKELEBEAUTY.COM CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

171

@REVAMPEDCOLLISI

ION I (857) 626-4353

{ { SHE HUSTLES TALKS}} SHIFT+CONTROL

174

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ { SHE HUSTLES TALKS}} SHIFT+CONTROL

MARY ALICE BY MICHELLE DIBERNARDO

MaryAlice Enright, I’m 46 yrs old and I currently live in Gilbertsville, Pa which is situated in Montgomery County, Pa. She was born and raised in Delaware County inside a little suburban town called Folcroft. She has two beautiful children, Patrick who is 15, and Samantha who is 12 yrs old.

me to never quit. Michelle: If you could work with any celebrity who would it be?

Michelle: What made you get into the entertainment business?

2) My mom has always inspired me. No matter how difficult a situation we were in she always managed to stay on top and stay positive. My mom was sick most of my childhood but no matter she made it known how much she loved me and she taught

4) In five years I still see myself doing more Hair Modeling and Acting but also I plan to have my Real Estate License by then. I’m great with people and I know my Real Estate. That’s my ultimate goal. Michelle: You do a lot of hair modeling. Can you tell the audience what hair modeling entails?

1) I decided to take the chance in the entertainment industry a few years back in June 2016 for a Madison Reed Hair Modeling Casting Call for QVC. My hair has always been my signature trademark so I took the opportunity to try out for QVC. My hair was long and thick so I took the chance. I competed with a lot of girls but the ones in charge of Madison Reed liked me. I just made sure I let my confidence shine and I acted like myself. The rest was history. Michelle: Who inspires you?

Michelle: Where do you see yourself in 5 years?

5) In order to be a great hair model the number one thing that I feel is important to be one is actually being relatable to your audience. That’s what they love.

3) If I could work with any celebrity I’d say it would have to be Richard Gere. His charismatic ways and has a long list of movies under his belt have always caught my attention.

Hair Modeling involves putting your hair in the hairstylist’s hands and having faith that they’ll make you look amazing. Sometimes hair gigs can take all day depending on how drastic the outcome. For example, last year when I was at a New York hair gig it took the entire day just to get the right color desired. I love hair modeling because it’s always evolving and there are so many different looks. I love knowing that I inspire others with my hair and I’m approachable which helps viewers relate to me.

Even with him being older he always had a place in my heart.

Social Media: Facebook and on IG at Maryalice_enright

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

175

8400 OSWEGO RD. STE 1 I LIVERPOOL, NY I SYRACUSESILHOUETTE.COM I (315) 848-6020

{{{ SHE HUSTLES TALKS}}}} SAVON SPEAKS TALKS SHIFT+CONTROL

THE LEAVES ARE CHANGING. BY SAVON HOLT I PHOTOS BY DARREN WARRICK

Fall is such a beautiful season. Some of the best things about Autumn are the beautiful changing colors of leaves, the slight chill in the air, and the crackle from the warm fireplace as it casts bright, and welcoming light throughout the room. We cannot forget autumn’s romantic and beautiful scenery, holidays such as Thanksgiving that bring families together, warm apple cider, pumpkin pies, and seeing kids dressed up as their favorite superheroes for Halloween.

In the autumn season, daylight savings limits sunlight to trees. Like most living things, the Sun is the primary energy for plants. It is how the leaves convert into their food. However, since fall days are shorter, trees shut down, no longer bearing fruit. The nutrients are redirected to the tree’s stems and roots. This is how trees survive the cold and

Oh! Let us not forget the fashionably stylish clothes like denim patterns, hats, scarfs, gloves, leather jackets, and might I add cute fall boots and peep-toe booties that women can’t resist. For many, autumn is merely another season that comes and goes every year. But for me, autumn is the perfect time of the year. I think of it as more than just the Earth’s orbit around the Sun. I view it as the season for beautiful changes. Autumn represents life, shedding, and transitioning. Think about it! Fall is when leaves transition from green to red, orange, yellow, purple, brown, and when plants stop making food. Trees shed leaves. Do you see where I am going with this? Fall relates to the human life cycle. Be attentive because the leaves are about to show you how beautiful they are.

180

dry winter months. But even with the leaves falling onto the ground and eventually die, they become nutrients for the soil to help plants’ growth during the spring season. So, what if I told you that your current situation is part of your continued growth? Picture your life as the autumn trees. There comes the point in life when

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

we reflect on our life and realize how far we have come. We acknowledge our growth and expansion and vow to ourselves to never go back to our old patterns. Our experiences develop our ripeness and maturity. What an incredible feeling, right? What does autumn teach us? It teaches us that it is okay to let go of things that do not add value to our lives. Whether it is a person, job, or a thing that you are struggling with; the leaves teach us not to waste our time feeding situations that do not need our energy. This is where letting go should be looked at as a beautiful thing. Life will take you to a better and new place. Remember when I said that the plants die-off rather than to force themselves to produce? Well, that is just like life. If you hold on to dead weight, you may regret it later. Holding on only means you are trying to force life into a place of your demands. Your growth will be stunted. You must trust the process. Only then will you learn that it hurts more to hold on than to let go. Learn to let go. Once you let go, observe how beautiful your life becomes. You will be amazed at how remarkably beautiful your glow will be. Pay attention to how much your life changes when you release what is draining your spirit. Notice how differently you walk, talk, dress,

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

181

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

“So, what if I told you that your current situation is part of your continued growth? Picture your life as the autumn trees.”

182

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

183

SAVON SPEAKS { {{SHE HUSTLES TALKS}}} SHIFT+CONTROL “Oh! Let us not forget the fashionably stylish clothes like denim patterns, hats, scarfs, gloves, leather jackets, and might I add cute fall boots and peep-toe booties that women can’t resist.”

, laugh, etc. You even attract different people to you. The best thing about this process is discovering your worth and acknowledging your beauty. This, my queen, is a place of peace and maturity. Autumn represents maturity. Have you ever taken something away from a child who then kicked and screamed because they could not fathom living without whatever was taken away from them? You too must let go even if you do not want to. If someone or something has run its

184

course in your life, served its purpose, or God chose to remove it, let it go. Be wise enough to see the lesson in each situation and mature enough to walk away and embrace the beautiful changes. The next time you look outside during fall, remember it’s time to reflect on life, shed the dead weight and make mental, physical, and spiritual changes. Don’t be afraid of the process. Remember me saying the dead leaves become nutrients for the soil to help the plants survive in the Spring? It’s the same with the dead

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

weight we carry. The dead weight is only heavy to us because it’s no longer our responsibility, but it may be good nutrients somewhere else. The leaves are changing. Even though the leaves fall off the tree, the tree still lives. The tree still stands tall, even when letting go. The tree represents life, wisdom, prosperity, power, growth, and they show us how beautiful life can be when dead things are removed or released. You are the tree!

{ SHE HUSTLES TALKS }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

185

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

WWW.SAVON 186

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

SAVON SPEAKS

NSPEAKS.COM CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

187

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

HIGH FASHION WITH COMPASSION - Worldwide Delivery - Proudly Handmade In Ecuador - Vegan Friendly Faux Leather - 5% Of Profits Go To Human & Animal Charities

WWW.TCOSTACOLLECTIONNYC.COM

{SHIFT+CONTROL TIME FOR YOU } }} { { SHE HUSTLES TALKS

THE QUESTION IS WHY? BY SHANNON HOLMES

Have you ever stopped and thought back about how hectic and crazy the past week in your life has been? Have you reviewed in your mind, work, the chores, the meals, the school work, taking care of the kids, driving to extra-curricular activities, playing referee, and trying to find time to sit down and breathe. Do you want to just find a room to hide in with a comfy blanket and a glass of wine, to spend 10 minutes without being called, or expected to do something? But, then you feel Guilty.

others. If we are sad, depressed, frustrated, annoyed, then how are we supposed to bring positivity, joy, and love to the ones we love. Simple answer. We can’t. Start with NO. It’s okay to say No. No to a playdate, an extra errand, or even a gathering. You don’t have to let your children or even you attend everything. (Guilty feeling?) The kids will be mad at me. They will get over it. You’re here

The question is why? Why do we as women feel guilty about taking time for ourselves? We provide constant care for others and put our needs and feelings last. Human nature? Maybe? Common expectation? How can we start to retrain our minds to say it’s OKAY to say not now. It’s OKAY to say later. It’s OKAY to say I need some ME time. With the state of the world adjusting to the current pandemic, many normal behaviors have changed. It’s not as easy to leave for a quick errand and slip away for some alone time that is relaxing. Going out can be stressful, so the time of friendly get-togethers has been put on hold. So how, can we continue to provide mental and physical wellness for us, without feeling that we are being selfish. It has taken a while to come to terms with the realization that, in order to take care of someone we love, we need to take care of ourselves first. Think of the message on an airplane. Adults put your oxygen on first, then place the mask on the child. If we are not strong then we can’t care for 190

to be a parent, not a friend. Setting boundaries for yourself will also help them in the long run. They will learn the importance of self help and time management. Having them realize that mommy is human and she needs time to rest, relax, and heal is important. Your true friends will understand if you don’t make it to an event or decide to stay in for a night. Do not let people make you feel guilty about saying No.

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

Ask for help. Yes, we like to think we are Wonder Woman, and can do everything without help, however, we then suffer. The stress builds up inside, we can’t separate feelings and emotions. Lines get blurred, and sometimes feelings get hurt. Assign chores to kids. Hold them accountable. Create a family chore chart, show them progress with stickers, or work towards a Goal. It can be as simple as taking a walk together or baking cookies. This is also something for your significant other as well. If you’re married, in a relationship, or single, you still need HELP with some things in life. A shoulder to cry on, a good friend to talk to, or a partner to share the responsibilities with. Even if it is a small thing, like loading the dishwasher, or changing the trash. One less thing for you to do yourself. As the winter months are heading towards us and the stress of holidays sets in, it’s even more important to find some time on a weekly basis to breathe. Take the extra 5 minutes in the shower. Enjoy a quiet cup of coffee. Go to bed early, it will be good for everyone. Keeping you feeling, “normal” calm, grounded will help maintain the balance within your family. Try to do a schedule where you can set aside 10 minutes a day for just you. Even if it is just for a quick walk up and down your street, or an extra cup of coffee. A quiet time to destress. Remember, you are important. You are worth it. You are special. Your family and friends will benefit from you taking time for yourself to feel better, and they will love you more in the long run. Stay safe, be loved, and love deeply. Ask for Help. Don’t feel guilty about saying No. It’s okay to say NO.

{ RECOVERX } } { SHIFT+CONTROL

AJ EXCURSIONS

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

191

{ COACHING WITH KRISTIN }

MEET STACEY KULL BY KRISTEN BAUER GROSS I PHOTOS BY MARK KNOPP

Make-up and Hair Carolyn Valure As a model coach, speaker, and longtime commercial model and actress, I often share modeling or acting advice, projects related to my “Courage to Dream” mission or issues I feel strongly about (go check out my article from last month on Ruth Bader Ginsburg).

was accepted. However, the company wanted $1,000 and my parents didn’t have the money. So nothing became of it. Years pass, I have my own children and they are interested in the industry. I do everything I can to help them get started. So, I myself finally got my

This month, excited to share an interview with Stacey Kull. Stacey is a model, a mom, an entrepreneur, and a dental professional. She’s a motivated woman and member of my ACTION online program for small market models and actors to learn, connect and succeed. She was featured in a women’s motivational calendar I recently created and published. More on that project here: www.KristinB. com/calendar Stacey also won our grand prize package for top calendar model sales including: 2 nights oceanview hotel accommodations, photoshoot package with photographer Mark Knopp, professional make-up and hairstyling, a feature in Rochester Woman Online and much more! Sounds amazing right! The photos in this article were taken during from her grand prize photoshoot! How did you get started or interested in modeling? “I have been interested in modeling since I was about 15. I went to an open audition for a large company and 192

because it gave me time, that I wouldn’t have had, if time wasn’t standing still. I was able to complete an acting class and follow up with agencies within my area. It also helped me get myself more fit and active.” What would you say to women who feel like something is holding them back from pursuing modeling or acting or any dream that feels a little bit impossible? Perhaps, they feel they are not tall enough, slim enough, talented enough, connected enough, young enough, smart enough or any other type of feeling “not enough”? “I would tell woman that there are different categories of modeling as well as different body type needs. I am a firm believer that if you truly want something, you will find the means to make it happen. I also feel that we are all beautiful in our own way and need to find what makes us stand out in a crowd. I also feel like modeling is more than a pretty face. I am a huge believer that beauty comes from within and that having hate or an ugly uncaring heart, shows on the outside and how you carry yourself and treat others.”

chance, because the kids are older now.” Has the pandemic affected pursuing this dream positively or negatively or both? “The pandemic affected me positively

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

How has the ACTION program with Kristin Bauer-Gross helped you pursue your model and talent goals? “The ACTION program with Kristin has been AMAZING! She truly is a very compassionate person and has a heart of gold. She wants us all to succeed. And also teaches that in this industry you

{ COACHING WITH KRISTIN } “The pandemic affected me positively because it gave me time, that I wouldn’t have had, if time wasn’t standing still.”

have to be a go getter. Modeling jobs don’t just fall from the sky. She teaches all areas of the field. Like what to look for in an agency, how to prepare yourself for auditions as well as photoshoots. I would highly recommend this program to anyone who wants to pursue modeling, yet is lost as to where to start.” What has been your favorite photoshoot or a notable moment in your modeling endeavors? “I have had a lot of fun doing photoshoots. Working with Mark Knopp doing the calendar photos was great. He is very patient and has great guidance. Since being the grand prize winner and having 194

the opportunity to work with Mark again, I can honestly say he is very professional and helped me be very comfortable in front of the camera. That is very important when working with “strangers”. If you are feeling off, it will show in your photos. I also stepped outside of my comfort zone and did a pin up girl photo shoot! That was AMAZING!

Follow Stacey Kull on Instagram @ StaceyKull or Facebook as Stacey Kull Interested in modeling or commercial acting? Drop me a note and I’ll send you my free masterclass https://www.kristinb. com/contact

If I can say one thing, it would be this. Don’t think you are too old, that’s just a number. Don’t settle in life. If you truly want to fulfill your dream, PLEASE DO SO!”

RWO readers use code VIP50 for $50 off your 1st month

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

Check out the ACTION Program www. KristinB.com/action-program

Catch my free IGTV series “Model Tips” on Instagram @KristinBauerGross

196

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

IN HER HER OWN WORDS WOMEN WHOWORDS INSPIRE }}}}} FOR A GOOD CAUSE IN OWN {{{{{ WOMEN WHO INSPIRE

A MOM’S PERSPECTIVE BY LAURI MCNIGHT

W H E N YO U R C H I L D I S DIAGNOSED WITH TESTICULAR CANCER If the Covid-19 pandemic was not enough to change our lives in 2020, I had learned to manage this new normal and my position as Executive Director from home. I had not seen my five children for many weeks.- especially the baby who had been away at school and working. In late May he arrived home and shared rather uncomfortably a health concern he had… something that would change our lives for the next few months and beyond.

could be removed, and his prognosis was excellent. I listened, I felt the surreal aura encompassing me, us. It was outpatient surgery, it would be scheduled right away. Suddenly, you are faced with a whirlwind of tests, appointments, and surgery. A mother’s worst nightmare is anything serious happening to her child. Every morning I opened my eyes, thanked God for our life and looked for

The initial medical appointment was supposed to just rule out our concern. After all my baby just turned 20 years old- what could be seriously wrong with this healthy fit kid? But when my son emerged from Our doctor’s office with orders for an ultrasound and a urology appointment I was surprised and concerned. In faith I believed that this was just a routine precaution. But the ultrasound was not as positive as I believed, and neither was the lab work.

a sign that this was just a bad dream. This could not be happening.

A week later we sat in the Urologist office while the Dr. discussed the results, and very matter of fact stated the ultrasound demonstrated that the small mass indicated a malignancy. My son and I sat there listening to the report that it was likely to be cancer, was common, how youth is on his side, it

As we drove to the hospital for surgery, I reminded myself not to cry in his presence. He needed my strength. He was quiet, reserved, and tired but he is 20 and As I walked him to the hospital door, I realized it was far worse than leaving him at his Kindergarten class or even at his college dorm the prior year.

Covid-19 pandemic restricted me from attending the surgery and walking back to the car to wait I just cried the tears of a mother whose baby was hurting, and I could not fix it-the only thing I have never been able to fix for him. Many very anxious hours later I got the call to collect him, and the surgeons call that it went well, the biopsy proved the Urologist correct- it was malignant and had been removed. But it was contained and gone so the prognosis was “excellent”. The next few days were awful, but I was appreciative to be at home during this time and became mom the caretaker instantly. My son was experiencing things we could not imagine or believe. My prayers were constant. My plea for healing was incessant. I called prayer groups, pastors, friends, and family to pray and believe with us. Yet something continued to nag at me, and I could not feel peace. Now I knew I had to be extremely educated. Two week later, labs, CT scan, Urologist visit where we once again were ready to hear the good news that the surgeon had presented. We would discuss if any treatment would be needed but as a mom desperately wanting my child to be well convinced myself that would not be the case. Once in the Urologist office, in breezed the doctor with another very matter of fact report that the lab work showed increased levels tumor markers (what on earth are tumor markers?) and that was

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

198

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

199

{ { IN HER OWN WORDS {{ SHE SHIFT+CONTROL HUSTLES TALKS }}} } SHIFT+CONTROL ~I love you forever, I like you for always, as long as I am living my baby you will be~

not be the case. Once in the Urologist office, in breezed the doctor with another very matter of fact report that the lab work showed increased levels tumor markers (what on earth are tumor markers?) and that was not normal after an orchiectomy . The pathology report reads that the removed tumor was a germ cell tumor, a rarer and more aggressive, non-seminoma cancer and it had spread to a lymph node before the removal. I felt the room close in, the doctors voice faded as the shock was paralyzing for a moment. I stared ahead, afraid to look at my son as I blinked back tears but still some escaped and ran down my cheek at the exact moment my son, in slow motion turned to me. I knew he needed me to say or do something. I am his mother, I fix everything, I always know what to do, I needed to fix this, he needed me to fix this. My mother’s heart was crushed, broken for my child because this I could not fix. I uttered questions, words out of order….what is the prognosis. “It’s still incredibly good but he will need treatment. I am sending you to an oncologist”, An oncologist? A cancer doctor? This just got even more real. Fighting anger, tears, and wanting to scream at the doctor, we scheduled the appointment. In the car we sat in silence for a moment. My son broke the ice, “so lets go eat” -always the answer for this Hispanic and Sicilian. And so, the nightmare began. Yet, something in me arose from the 200

emotional distress after the doom and gloom two-hour consultation with a diagnoses of stage three testicular cancer. I had gathered some increased mama bear strength, done my research and summoned my higher power -I refused to accept stage 3. There is nothing I would not do or learn for my child. I can tell you whatever you want to know about this cancer. I understand every lab acronym, every blood test, every treatment, and every cure rate. This was MY baby and his health. The plan to infuse chemotherapy poison into him was not going down without my knowledge of the diagnosis and the treatment. I called every successful large hospital on the east coast and learned every detail and discussed second opinions. I will tell every parent of a male child- never think this could not happen to your child. The highest incidence rate for testicular cancer is 15-35 year old males. My faith, strength, a praying community, and knowledge were the keys to getting through this nightmare. It kept my son strong and because his belief that he was going to be well and his “just cancer- I am not dying” mentality it gave me such hope. He was correct- he was going to beat this! Many days I cried, walked the trails at the cancer center and prayed as I waited for him at his treatments. I followed every test result, I used the medical app, asked a million questions, sought advice, read everything and I pushed for more to happen. I took care of him 24/7 with all my nutrition and now

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

medical information I was determined to make him well and beat this life sucking monster! Six weeks later, with a future schedule of 12-weeks of aggressive treatmentshis tumor marker levels (now I know them all) were already back to normal range. Through terribly sick days, weight loss, hair loss and two hospital stays for low counts his young body continued to fight and heal, reducing his treatment need. We celebrated his ringing the bell this month with the whole family present in our supporting tee shirts. While he is still recovering, I know the power of education, faith, support, the great treatment at Pluta. Ensuring my child received excellent and effective care was my mission and will be always. Our journey is nearing its end and new beginnings are on the horizon- thankfully! ~I love you forever, I like you for always, as long as I am living my baby you will be~ Be educated, know the signs, and teach your young men to detect early! www.cancer.org

SHIFT+CONTROL {{{ {IN HER OWN WORDS A MOTHERâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S SHE HUSTLES TALKS }} }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

201

KIM RIEPPEL I WINESHOP AT HOME CONSULTANT WINESHOPATHOME.COM/KIMRIEPPEL I EMAIL: THE.WEINMEISTER@OUTLOOK.COM (315) 857-6686

{ TEEN TALK }

BEING DIFFERENT BY GABRIELLE EDEN

Being Different...Those words best describe me and I’m sure a few other teens. I really don’t think of myself as a normal teenager. They always say “It’s ok to be different”, but I have never seen anyone embrace that saying in my school. Sometimes, I feel like I’m the only color in a gray shaded rainbow because of who I am. Don’t get me wrong, being different is great, but it can also have its downsides, but I’ll get to that later. I was always different in school, from the way I saw things, to the way I express myself in music and writing. In seventh grade, I was the only one who would join chorus and drama club. I was the smallest (at four foot seven) and the youngest so it felt a little awkward at first. In eighth grade, I realized during our “Guys and Dolls” production that I loved the 19401950’s style and I wanted to dress like it all the time, and that became true in my Freshman year. Over those years, my love for music became stronger and I started to take music state tests with my music teacher. I never liked sports, I thought they would get me killed, so I turned to music, theatre, and writing as my after school activities. I was doing things no one would dream of in those years, auditions for films, singing at concerts no one had even 204

heard of, doing summer theatre when I could, and writing for this column. I love these differences, because they make me feel free and happy. And now...the downsides that I face and I’m sure we all face these if we embrace the differences. It’s hard to

make friends because no one knows what you’re talking about or what you’re doing and start thinking you’re a freak. I often get a lot of rude stares by a lot of my classmates when I eat lunch alone in the cafeteria and/or in the hallways because my arms are full of writings and sheet music. Even in class people stare. No one likes to

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

talk to me because either they think I’m better off as an outcast or that I won’t relate with anything with them. When I do talk to students about what I do, they give a fake smile, a weird look, and/or walk away. I didn’t do anything wrong, it’s just that students don’t like different personalities. It always gets me, students don’t like different kids. I have no idea why. Maybe they feel like they’re not alfa students when someone else embraces who they are. Maybe they like it all the same and don’t like excitement in their lives. Maybe they’re jealous. Who knows, the reasons are endless! There’s the thing, I don’t like being the same as everyone else. I always liked to dress up when no one else dresses up, I always had a story to tell when people couldn’t write one, and I go places no one has seen. I love how these differences affect my life. I am always happy when I do what I love, I am always at peace, and my anxiety goes down. Personally, I love being different. What I do makes me a person in this world no matter what. My music, acting, writing, everything I love makes me feel alive in school even though it is not accepted by my classmates. Sometimes, doing what I love makes me feel like a free bird,

{HUSTLES SPECIAL FEATURE } { { SHE ENTREPRENHERS }} SHEHUSTLES ENTREPRENHERS

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

205

{ TEEN TALK } “Being Different...Those words best describe me and I’m sure a few other teens. I really don’t think of myself as a normal teenager.”

flying in the air without anyone pulling me down or clipping my wings. No one can take away my talents and what I have to give in this world. I’m telling you now, let no one make you feel bad about who you are, because you may have a gift that comes once in a lifetime. In my school, I have never met anyone who 206

expresses themselves in a unique and creative way that makes them stand out from the crowd. I think that many students want to stand out from the crowd but are too scared to try. Look, different comes in many ways, from music to math. I believe that people have something unique to give to this world and they should let it glow. I

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

notice that a lot of people just hold back a special talent that they have bottled up, so I think it’s time to release it and embrace it. Embrace your differences and see where your story can lead you.

{ THE ACS CORNER} } SHIFT+CONTROL

THE LEAVES ARE CHANGING. BY JOHNNY WILLIAMS

The beginning of a new chapter always means the end of another one. Such is the case once again. As Animal Care Sanctuary (ACS) looks forward toward the much-anticipated opening of its new kennel and clinic in early October, this exciting new chapter will be first one in a decade that will not include Chief Executive Officer – and dear friend – Joan Smith-Reese.

always been very passionate – just all in. And from the ground up, we were able to make it happen. “She had an idea then what animal welfare should look like,” Rossiter continued. “A lot of the standards you see across major shelters today, she was trying to

“She’s always looking at the bigger picture,” said former Animal Services Director Rachel Rossiter, who was SmithReese’s first hire 10 years ago and only recently departed ACS, herself. “She has 208

“The clinic is a direct result of Joan’s efforts,” said ACS Board President Ellen Feldman. “She’s just a person of ultimate integrity who was able to take our late Founder Lesley Sinclair’s vision forward in an amazing way.” That vision also led to the successful addition of a second ACS location in Wellsboro several years ago. “Joan just always makes herself available,” ACS Wellsboro Director Rachel Preble said. “She might not always be here physically, but she’s always here when we need her. We both share a social work background and we both have big dreams for Wellsboro. I’ve really enjoyed working with her. She relates to everyone. She pushes everyone without micromanaging, and she gets you out of your comfort zone in a good way.”

Once the clinic and kennel are open to the public, Smith-Reese will officially hand the keys of the sanctuary to Terri McKendry, who has been the ACS director of development for the past two years. It would not be an understatement to say Smith-Reese’s leadership at ACS over the past 10 years was nothing short of transformational. She not only departs ACS with a brand-new facility, but also with a record-setting adoption rate. When Smith-Reese arrived at ACS as Executive Director, the animal care facilities needed repairs and upgrading; there was no community clinic at all; and adoptions were few. But as many who have worked with Smith-Reese closely over the years, all of whom also had a hand in the transformation of the shelter on the hill, have said, she is a visionary.

wellness exams to the surrounding communities.

implement back then.” Among those visions was the on-site community clinic. In addition to providing more efficient, cost-effective veterinarian services to the hundreds of cats and dogs take in by ACS each year, this clinic also provides low-cost spay/neuter surgeries, vaccinations and

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

One of those ways was early in Smith-Reese’s and Rossiter’s tenures, when they made the trek to Washington D.C. to advocate for stronger protections for animals. “We went down there, and we were around all the big national names in animal sheltering,” Rossiter said. “No one knew who we were, but it never fazed Joan. She was proud that we were there, and now we’re one of those nationally-recognized shelters.” But even beyond her professional achievements at ACS, Smith-Reese will be remembered and missed for how she treated everyone.

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

209

{{ THE ACS CORNER } } SHIFT+CONTROL ““She’s just a person of ultimate integrity who was able to take our late Founder Lesley Sinclair’s vision forward in an amazing way.”

“She always remembers to give out birthday cards and Christmas cards – no matter who you are,” said Animal Services Director Becca Morgan. “She genuinely cares about the people who work at ACS. She can see things in people that they don’t see in themselves. She has faith and confidence in them.” “Joan’s heart and soul lives here,” Executive Coordinator Kim Chebalo said. “She has worked from dawn to dusk and 210

sometimes in-between, and she has so much energy for what is happening with the dogs and cats. She has given everything to make ACS what it is today. I hope she knows that she built an amazing Animal Care Sanctuary.” “Working with Joan has been special,” added Feldman. “I think people are drawn to her humility – how she’s genuinely interested, empathetic, and listens to what you have to say. She has a heart the size of Pennsylvania.”

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

Smith-Reese leaves ACS with an irreplaceable legacy, and she has left a mark as large and lasting as that of our founder, Lesley Sinclair. She took the unknown “shelter on the hill” and transformed it into a leading animal rescue center, community clinic and advocate for animal rights, and her own pawprint will be on ACS forever.

Make a Gift Tax-Free with an IRA { SHIFT+CONTROL } Donate to Help Animal Care Sanctuary and Save On Taxes at the Same Time

If you are 70½ years old or older, you can take advantage of a simple way to benefit Animal Care Sanctuary and receive tax benefits in return. You can give any amount up to $100,000 per year from your IRA directly to a qualified charity such as ours without having to pay income tax on the money. This popular gift option is commonly called the IRA charitable rollover, but you may also see it referred to as a qualified charitable distribution, or QCD for short. The most important stipulation of donating from your IRA is that you must not withdraw your gift into another one of your personal accounts. Your gift must be transferred directly from the custodian of your IRA to Animal Care Sanctuary. SECURE Act of 2019 Although the SECURE Act of 2019 raised the age for the required minimum distribution from 70.5 to 72, the rules regarding the Qualified Charitable Distributions have not changed. An IRA owner at age 70.5 or older can still give by making a qualified charitable distribution from an IRA. In other words, a 71-year-old IRA owner can make a qualified charitable distribution from an IRA even though a distribution may not be required at that age. Tax Benefits For those who are eligible (age 70.5+), a qualified charitable distribution from an IRA is a tax-wise giving strategy. The QCD amount is not counted as income, which means no tax is due. How to Get Started •

Contact Trish Callahan Murzyn at 610-331-4421 or tcallahan@animalcaresanctuary.org for more information on an IRA gift to ACS.

•

Seek the advice of your financial advisor.

•

Ask your IRA administrator about making a direct transfer to Animal Care Sanctuary or have the administrator send a check from your account to us. To be tax free, the donation must go directly from your account to ACS without passing through your hands. CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

211

{ { COMMUNITY ASK THE DOCTOR ROCS } }

212

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ TAMMY’S TIDBITS }

THINK FULL BY TAMMY VREELAND

With the happy holidays upon us, I thought I would give you ideas on making the holidays as full as possible. November, we like to think of it as our month of thankfulness, with Thanksgiving being the center of that thought. By now, I’m sure you have been reminded on how thankful we all should be. So, I want to do a play on those words, for something different. And that is ...think full! Seriously, do we not all think (and moan) about all the different and wonderful foods during these holiday months? What with the feast during both holidays along with Christmas cookies, how could we not think full? But did you ever stop and wonder why we may fill until we are over full? It could be most of these foods, that we consume during these months, are usually limited to these months only! Seriously, would you have a full out turkey dinner for Memorial Day or a nice variety collection of Christmas cookies for the 4th of July? And yet, isn’t that what makes these two months special? Having traditional foods year after year? But what happens when suddenly you have to share in someone else’s traditions? Do old habits die hard, or do you embrace having something different added to your own yearly traditions? Why does it seem harder to introduce new foods during this time of year? Any other time, we would easily enjoy trying new foods. Thankfully,

in fact, to have new ideas for what’s for dinner. But for holiday dinners, that seems to be hands off! I’ve seen family feuds of whether it should be white or brown gravy. Turkey basted or in a bag. Or perhaps lasagna as a side dish or no turkey at all! You know all too well what I’m talking about, but this may be where we can apply my ‘think full’ idea. Who cares if someone wants to add their own take on your tradition? Especially if they are making it! Fill that table with new traditions and enjoy! It may surprise you that even though it may not be tradition to you, it’s actually quite good!

spiced wine that has been mixed with a couple of different wines? Heated spiced apple wine can be quite tasty! And what about flavored coffee, or different flavored creamers to go in the coffee, to have with dessert or those Christmas cookies? Also, we can’t forget my all-time favorite Eggnog! The only time of the year it even seems to be available, which makes me enjoy it even more! We’ve talked about the main course, drinks and desserts, but what about appetizers? Granted, we may think we’re having so much already - why in the world would we want people to fill up on appetizers?

Now for the Christmas cookies, I don’t really think there is much of a problem because a variety is an essential element in spreading good cheer! Allowing your loved ones to pick their favorites.

I think it all depends on how long you make every one wait, smelling that lovely dinner you are cooking! Having a couple of trays of cheese and olives, crackers and spread, may lessen those endless questions of ‘is it done yet?’!

What about drinks? I think sometimes this is an essential which is easily overlooked! For example, have you ever thought of serving spiced teas, wines, or even do I dare say... spiced punch?

Perhaps the tradition of one person putting on such a big spread could also be enhanced with people bringing their own dishes. Not only to help with the large task but introduce a new flavor to the table.

So many times, we worry about the main course and the dessert, that we scramble in that moment, when we ask what everyone wants to drink! Water is always a true staple, but how about being a little more festive with such an easy idea?

Here are some National Holidays for November and December that are food related to give us food for thought …traditional or something new to try?

What if you bring out some different teas... hot or cold... punch, or a nice

November 17th - National HomeMade Bread Day… Traditional or Unconventional? For me, it’s usually a quick crack of a Pillsbury tube of

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

213

{ TAMMY’S TIDBITS } “With the happy holidays upon us, I thought I would give you ideas on making the holidays as full as possible.”

crescent rolls, but, hey! If someone wants to make homemade bread, I will make room!

and those scales will face us soon enough! So I suppose, limiting them to December is for the best!

November 22nd - National Cranberry Relish… Traditional or Unconventional? Definitely a classic example of which do you prefer? A nice cylinder shape smooth from the can or a fancy version loaded with unusual things? Remember, there is nothing wrong with having both available!

December 12th - Ginger Bread House Day… Traditional or Unconventional?

So, there you have it, November and December wrapped up and a New Year on its way! And none too soon! I can honestly say, I am looking forward to saying goodbye to 2020 without looking back! However, we need to enjoy this time. Where not only good food is made but also wonderful memories with family and friends. A time where we can be thankful and appreciate the time we have with them.

November 26th - National Cake Day… Traditional or Unconventional? Is it pie or cake for dessert at your house for your Thanksgiving Day? Usually Apple pie for us, but again, if someone brings cake, they will not be turned down! December 4th - National Cookie Day… Traditional or Unconventional? I guess this can be the official day to start making Christmas cookies? Do you like to bake them or prefer to try others? What ones do you like? Is it the triedand-true sugar cookie? Or perhaps peanut butter with a chocolate kiss? Maybe you like shortbread cookies or even some rum balls? So many choices and so little time! Seriously, must we only have one month for all these varieties? Then again, January 214

Day… Traditional or Unconventional? Am I the only one who enjoys a good candy cane (especially the unique flavors) during this time when any other month, I would easily pass on any hard candy?

From my house to yours, I want to wish everyone Happy Holidays! Whether you are traditional or unconventional, we must remember - it is a time of year, where some things happen only at this time of year, so enjoy!

Ah yes, a true classic! Question is, do you make one or enjoy others? And if you make one, is it for fun? Letting the kids help, with a result barely recognizable as even a house? Or do you masterfully design a piece of art? December 19th - National Hard Candy

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

216

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ FINANCIALLY SPEAKING { SHIFT+CONTROL } }

STAY THE COURSE BY LAURIE HAELEN

With the Presidential Election, the level of angst today in America appears to be rising. The daily rhetoric from news sources on both ends of the political spectrum often pushes COVID-19 and other critical news to a back burner. Therefore, it is difficult for investors to discern what-if anything-they should do to protect themselves from the inevitable volatility that will arise from the various projected scenarios proposed by the daily news. The answer from an investment standpoint, most experts say, is to stay the course. Studies and charts validate this decisionâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;supporting the notion that there is no real difference in market returns, regardless of which party ends up in office. I agree with this advice but would add that its validity is dependent on what course you set for yourself. In other words, I think the best path for anyone in these uncertain times is to ensure you have a plan that will enable you to live your desired life. Instead of allowing the events of the day foster fear and uncertainty, dedicate some of your time to better defining your financial goals and the necessary focus required to achieve them by creating your own risk management strategy. In evaluating your financial life, it may be helpful to create categories or â&#x20AC;&#x153;bucketsâ&#x20AC;? that need to be filled with your various goals. Since life is not linear, it stands to reason that these components will at times support each other for your longer-term success. One of the most critical areas to focus on is risk prevention.

Risk prevention involves many aspects of your day-to-day life and involves protecting yourself from preventable losses. Insurance, for example, falls into this category. This includes property and casualty (covering your car, home and valuables), which also may include umbrella insurance, which covers losses in excess of your homeowner and automobile insurance. An annual review of your policies is an action item to put on your calendar. Health insurance is another key component of a risk prevention strategy. If you are fortunate enough to have insurance through your employer for a reasonable cost, then choosing a plan is certainly less complicated but still requires some analysis during annual enrollment. Human resource professionals are a great resource for employer-based plan selection. Marketplace health plans are another avenue that is a bit more complicated to navigate but well worth the time to ensure you can protect yourself from unexpected health care costs. Another critical aspect of risk prevention is an emergency fund to cover unexpected expenses, which may arise from job losses (a serious issue for many as a result of COVID-19), auto repair expenses or health care costs. This fund should be separate from any retirement plan or investment accounts and invested in something low risk that can be liquidated and available within a day. A money market or savings account, although low yielding these days, is a good place for emergency fund dollars. I recommend putting a portion of

your paycheck into this fund every pay period, with a target of having six months salary available for unexpected expenses. Your asset allocation is another salient aspect of your risk profile. Despite the many challenges we have faced in 2020, the stock markets have continued to do well over the past several months. This can be a perfect time to rebalance your portfolio, selling appreciated stocks to purchase safe-haven bonds. This will ensure your portfolio continues to be aligned with the strategy you chose to meet your goals. It is possible you will need to revisit your overall allocation to confirm that it is still appropriate for your long-term strategy. An effective way to do this is to utilize some calculators, widely available via company retirement plan websites, to determine the expected rate of return of your current strategy. Are you taking enough or too much risk with your portfolio to stay invested through the ups and downs the markets inevitably bring? A complete review of your allocation and holdings is a great step to take to feel more confident that you are preventing market risk from derailing your life goals. Debt management is another key part of the picture that must be addressed. The first thing to do is to get in the habit of having a personal balance sheet at your fingertips. I have always used a combination of a notebook and online aggregation tools to track my assets and liabilities over time. Do not feel defeated if at first your liabilities (student loans,

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

217

{ FINANCIALLY SPEAKING } “The answer from an investment standpoint, most experts say, is to stay the course.”

mortgage, autos, credit card debt) are higher than you would like them to be. Facing this is the first step in making it better, as you cannot solve a problem if you do not know the extent to which it exists. Your credit report is an important thing to review to ensure the picture you have of your financial situation is accurate.

2020 has brought us unprecedented challenges, and we cannot be sure of the risks that lie ahead. By taking the time to “de risk” your personal financial life, you can reduce the stress you can control and hopefully, in turn, be less stressed by the dayto-day news cycle. Over time, there have been many disruptors and there

will no doubt be more. Focus on your risk prevention strategy to secure your own future and to be able to live fully in the present while we await less volatile times. If the task seems daunting, a credentialed financial professional can help make it an easier exercise.

SHIFT+CONTROL { {UNSTOPPABLE { {BUSINESS SHIFT+CONTROL SPOTLIGHT WOMEN }} } }

220 NY WOMAN : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020 TETRACENTRAL IMAGES, LLC / ONLINE ALAMY

SHIFT+CONTROL { {BUSINESS SPOTLIGHT} }

ARE YOU A CANDIDATE BY JAROD SCHOONMAKER

For Scalp Micropigmentation? For many people, having a full head of hair is important for their self-esteem and confidence. But with about 28 million women in the United States currently facing hair loss, there are people who don’t have the full head of hair they desire. Fortunately, there are options for hair restoration. One of the most effective modern hairloss solutions available today is scalp micropigmentation. This procedure is noninvasive and requires minimal recovery time. So let’s take a look at who may be a good candidate for scalp micropigmentation.

scalp micropigmentation is ideal for people who keep their head shaved or hair closely cut. But that’s not to say you have to look bald to benefit from this procedure.

Unlike other procedures, like hair transplants, that require surgical procedures and actually moving hair follicles, scalp micropigmentation can add specifically sized and colored hair follicles with ink to reduce the appearance of the bald scalp. Furthermore, if someone has scars on their scalp, including those from previous attempts at hair transplants, scalp micropigmentation can lessen the appearance of the scars. Overall, whether someone is looking for a fuller head of hair, a more defined hairline, or a scar coverup, scalp micropigmentation can help.

Scalp micropigmentation may be especially beneficial for men and women who: • Are experiencing hair loss • Suffer from alopecia • Have a receding hairline • Have thinning hair • Want a stronger hairline • Want to cover scars on their scalp Overall, this procedure is great for anyone who may be experiencing hair loss or hair thinning. Generally,

someone with balding or thinning issues can have the image of real hair follicles on their scalp. So this procedure can be used on a completely bald spot or it can be used underneath hair to give the hair a denser look.

Scalp micropigmentation is essentially a hair tattoo. Using special ink, the person performing the procedure inserts the ink to mimic real hair follicles. By using this method,

If you are suffering from hair loss, you should know you’re not alone. But you don’t have to have a painful, lengthy surgical procedure to get your dream head of hair. With scalp micropigmentation, you’ll see immediate results and you can show your hair off with confidence again.

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

221

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

HELPING MEN AND WOMEN WHO ARE SUFFERING FROM HAIR LOSS, SCARS, AND FORMS OF ALOPECIA BECOME BETTER VERSIONS OF THEMSELVES THROUGH SCALP MICROPIGMENTATION.

2851 MILTON AVE SOLVAY, NY 13209 (800) 236-6792 WWW.SCALPNY.COM

{ MAKEUP TIPS WITH MICHELLE } { SHIFT+CONTROL }

BASIC MAKEUP BY MICHELLE DIBERNARDO

Hope everyone’s Fall has been amazing. Now I know some of you are still quarantined in the house due to Covid-19. but that doesn’t mean that you can’t put some makeup on and dress up to make yourself feel good. So. this month as promised I will discuss the steps of Basic Makeup.

The Third Step is powder. Powder should be applied all over your face to set in your foundation and concealer. Powder can also be found in a press form, what you find in a compact. If you’ve ever watched a movie or behind the scenes you may have seen them powdering the actors or actresses to prevent shine.

There are going to be seven makeup products that you are going to need to purchase along with matching brushes and/or sponges.

Your Fourth Step will be your blush. Blush is a soft pigment available in

First Step will be to start with a concealer. Okay some of you know what concealer is but there are some who absolutely do not. Concealer is a flesh-toned cosmetic used to cover dark circles, pimples or blemishes. Your concealer should always be a shade lighter than your actual skin color. Your Second Step will be your foundation. Now if you are like me you may have watched those pranks on social media where they put a whole bottle of foundation on their face. This is clearly not the proper thing to do to achieve your best Basic Makeup look. Foundation is a colored cream, powder, or liquid used as a base to even out facial skin tone before applying other cosmetics. Make sure that you purchase the correct foundation for your skin type. Throughout the seasons your foundation color may change.

224

Now you might have guessed that your Sixth Step is your lipstick. Lipstick will be applied to your lips and it comes in many different styles. You can always find the classic lipstick stick. Last but not least the Seventh Step will be your mascara. Mascara of course draws attention to your eyes and makes them stand out by darkening and thickening of the eyelashes. It comes with many different forms of wands so find the one that works best for your eyelashes. These would be my Seven Basic Makeup. Let’s talk about makeup brushes that you will need for these products. You will need a concealer and foundation brush or a sponge, a powder brush, a regular blush brush, a lip brush brow and a lash comb for your Basic Makeup products.

powders or creams meant to mimic the natural flush of your face, making your complexion look more healthy and vibrant. It will be applied to your actual cheekbones. You want a color that goes with your season so you will really pop. Fifth Step will be your lip liner. Lip liner is a cosmetic applied to the outline of the lips, mainly to prevent the unwanted spreading of lipstick or lipgloss.

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

So now why not put your Basic Makeup on a cute outfit and treat yourself to something nice. There is nothing wrong about feeling good about yourself and who doesn’t feel good with Basic Makeup. Stay tuned for the next issue in January of 2021. For updates on me check out www. MichelleDiBernardo.Com, also feel free check my business websites out at www.DiBernardoProductions.Media and www.CreatorsFilmFest.com.

{ CNY BUSINESS SPOTLIGHT } { SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

225

{ MIND, BODY, SPIRIT } } { SHIFT+CONTROL

SPIRITUAL GUIDANCE OF THE MIGHTY HAWK BY ALANA CAHOON

I just completed a three week solo meditation retreat. If you want to dig deep, I highly recommend it. Basically, all the stuff you’ve been repressing throughout your life comes to the surface. It’s not easy, especially when you’re alone. But that’s the thing. You’re not. You never are.

before, especially while doing healing and energy work with clients.

You are accompanied along the way with your higher guides, your spirit guides. These may show themselves as the gods and goddesses whom you believe in, whether that’s Jesus and Mary or Buddha and Prajnaparamita. It may be a holy person, prophet or diety from another religion or philosophy. Or you may be accompanied by a spirit animal like the hawk.

I wondered if I had stood outside and put my arm out, would she set herself upon it. I didn’t try this so I can’t give

When you have faith, your faith supports you through thick and thin. There is an inner knowing that everything will be all right. That you can do this. The power of spiritual guidance is not to be underestimated. Why is it important to clear the gook you’ve been burying inside? Because underneath all that stuff is where the magic lies; where your true essence lives, and when it emerges, the bliss of emptiness is discovered. The Mighty Hawk. Throughout my three weeks of meditating six hours daily, a beautiful hawk visited me. She flew outside my window nearly every day. This hawk has visited me 226

With a beautiful underbelly of white feathers and a tail of blazing red, this hawk swirled by the sky sometime so close to my window that I thought it might try to enter.

her wings in the expanse of the big sky. Let’s look at the first part of this definition. “A hawk symbolizes the ability to use intuition and higher vision to complete tasks or make important decisions.” Use your intuition to make important decisions. This makes absolute sense to me. How does it feel to you? Do you use your intuition to make decisions? How often have you made a decision and kicked yourself afterwards saying “Gosh I knew I shouldn’t have done that.” Why did you know? Most likely because your gut told you so.

tell you! According to powerofpositivity.com: “The hawk symbolizes the ability to use intuition and higher vision in order to complete tasks or make important decisions. ... Hawks represent the messengers of the spirit world, so seeing them definitely means the universe wants you to learn powerful lessons or expand your knowledge and wisdom.” As I write this, the hawk is circling above me. I am inspired as she spreads

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

This is usually where your intuition lies. It makes itself noticeable in your gut. Think of a baby kicking its mama’s belly because it’s hungry or because mama just had a cup of coffee and what was she thinking! Your belly will make you feel something when you are not choosing the right path. Butterflies, nausea. Even so, we ignore our intuition, our gut instincts. We look for something more concrete to base our decisions on, and unfortunately, we rely solely on these. Here’s an example. You’re shopping for a new car and have your heart set on the color red. But the sales person convinces you that black is the color trend. You go

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

227

{ MIND, BODY & SPIRIT } { SHIFT+CONTROL “When you have faith, your faith supports you through thick and thin. There is an inner knowing that everything will be all right. That you can do this. The power of spiritual guidance is not to be underestimated.”

ahead with that decision and purchase a brand new shiny black car.

could have balanced your decision on all of these.

As you’re driving around in your beautiful new car, you notice that every other car you pass by seems to be a shiny red car! You become frustrated and wonder why you allowed another person’s opinion to shift yours.

What’s important here, as our wise hawk reminds us, is to validate our intuition.

This was a financial investment that should have brought you pleasure and excitement, and instead brought you frustration. If you had listened to your gut, given credence to your true desires, and maybe done some research on what the sales person was suggesting - ie. are black cars in fact more trendy, and even if they are, does it matter - you 228

My suggestion is to balance it with knowledge i.e. research, and perhaps advisement from others. But always, and I mean always, go back to your gut. If it doesn’t feel right, it’s not. It may not be the right time to make the decision. Don’t feel rushed to choose unless you are good and ready to do so. Let’s look at the second part of the definition: “Hawks represent the messengers of the

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

spirit world, so seeing them definitely means the universe wants you to learn powerful lessons or expand your knowledge and wisdom.” Yes. Absolutely true. During my 3 week solo meditation retreat, I learned powerful lessons and yes, both my knowledge and wisdom expanded. Now, I will honor the time needed to absorb it all, and then, make important decisions. Alana Cahoon is the founder & creative coach of Grow 2 B U, LLC. Grow your business. Expand your mind. Heal your soul. www.AlanaCahoon.com

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

230

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SEXUALLY SPEAKING} } { SHIFT+CONTROL

THE GIFT OF SELF PLEASURE BY M. BARRETT

I would like to invite you into a space that is purely for yourself. We are not talking about our to-do list, the never ending tasks of doing things for others, or the pressures to succeed in our high demanding culture. We are entering a conversation that explores self-pleasure. What is this concept of pleasure? Do we give ourselves permission to receive the gift of pleasure? Many of us may feel guilty taking time out of our busy schedules to focus on ourselves. We have people in our lives that need us, that count on us. It is important that we nurture our important relationships, however do we nurture the relationship with ourselves? As a Marriage and Family Therapist and Certified Sex Therapist, I find the gift of self-pleasure to be an essential element to our overall sexual health and well-being. This journey here is to explore the concept of selfpleasure, benefits of inviting pleasure into our lives, potential barriers, and lastly, some ideas on how you can begin to reconnect and explore your own sense of self pleasure. Why should I invest in my own pleasure? This concept of pleasure is as unique as we are as people. The 2016 Global Advisory Board for Sexual Health and Wellbeing talks about pleasure, and the difference in its meaning. It is influenced by age, gender, sexual identity, sexual desire, sexual capacity, health status and trauma

experiences. Pleasure is something that we attune to-- something we cultivate in ourselves. If we don’t allow space or time for our pleasure we can become disconnected with that part of the self. Allowing ourselves to give and receive pleasure can assist with stress release, relaxation, grounding with who we are, and self-identity. The more we are connected with what makes up our experience of pleasure generally, and sexual pleasure specifically, the more likely we will be able to experience pleasure with others. Self-knowledge about our own sexual pleasure is a key element in expressing our sexual selves with confidence and joy. Esther Perel, a couples and sex therapist, explores pleasure in this way; “self-care isn’t just about facemasks and mindfulness, though those are great too. It’s about tuning into our bodies and letting them teach us what we like, what we don’t like, and what we don’t know about ourselves yet. Befriending our bodies and making peace with them, is the beginning of one the best relationships we can ever have: the relationship with ourselves. ” Life gets in the way We are experiencing unprecedented times in this global pandemic. Our “normal” has been hijacked and life as we know it is in a constant state of ambiguity. These uncertainties can become the predominant narrative that captivates our lives. However, it isn’t just COVID 19 that has the capability to hijack our focus on selfpleasure; there are constant challenges with daily routines, chores, work,

kids, finances, social engagements, etc. We live in a culture with many distractors that create barriers to pause, to be present with self, and to explore pleasures in the moment. It is important to be intentional about spending time with self and explore our pleasures. We schedule most tasks in our lives. Carving out space and time for ourselves is essential to overall balance of well-being. Taking time to cultivate pleasurable context; a quiet space in the house, a time when we feel most energized, or shutting off the phone for a period of time. Creating that time and space for ourselves invites pleasure, even when we live in a world where barriers are inevitable. How do I explore pleasure? We can explore self-pleasure in a variety of ways. Pleasure can be derived from a wide range of activities-- from everyday tasks to more sensual experiences. We may cultivate great pleasure in our daily morning routine with coffee, curling up with our favorite blanket or the usual stroll in the neighborhood. These daily routines that we do for self-care can be explored in a way that enhances the experience of pleasure and embodiment. Embodiment means being placed in our bodies, providing us insight into our bodily and sensual experience. For instance, when sipping my morning hazelnut coffee, do I pause to notice the sweet and nutty aroma or the heat of the mug as it touches my lips? On the

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

231

{ SEXUALLY SPEAKING} } { SHIFT+CONTROL â&#x20AC;&#x153;I would like to invite you into a space that is purely for yourself. We are not talking about our to-do list, the never ending tasks of doing things for others, or the pressures to succeed in our high demanding culture.â&#x20AC;?

morning walk, am I responding and noticing the sun hitting my skin or the wind at my face? When we are able to invite our bodies into our experiences, we are able to attune to this connection our body has to our world around us. To feel connected to our bodies in a way that evokes calm, relaxation and pleasure, we create a journey to further explore our pleasure with self. The power of touch, being able to notice temperature, texture, and pressure enhance our knowledge 232

and connection to what our bodies like and dislike. An additional element to exploring pleasure in our bodies is to explore and become creative with pleasure in our minds. Our imagination and ability to be creative is a wonderful gift into enhancing our sense of pleasure. When we are with ourselves, we can play in our minds with fantasy and pleasure that can enhance our present experience. I hope this evokes an internal dialogue, the relational check-in, and the

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

permission to talk out loud about the essential need for nurturing ourselves, loving ourselves, and giving PLEASURE to ourselves. Megan Barrett, MS, LMFT, CST is a certified sex therapist at the Rochester Center for Sexual Wellness. She derives great pleasure and satisfaction from working with a variety of sexual concerns, including low desire and difficulty obtaining orgasm.

{ SEXUALLY SPEAKING} } { SHIFT+CONTROL

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

233

SEX* *NOW THAT WE HAVE YOUR ATTENTION...

Announcing Western New Yorkâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s first comprehensive resource for sexual and relationship wellness and menopause medicine.

Introducing the Rochester Center for Sexual Wellness where sexual medicine specialists and certified sex therapists offer a holistic approach to sexual and relationship wellness. Offering confidential and open-minded care to people of all genders and sexualities that is specifically designed to help YOU meet YOUR GOALS. Also, featuring a nationally certified menopause medicine specialist to help make mid-life your BEST LIFE

CALL US AT 585-865-3584 FIND OUT MORE AT WWW.ROCHESTERCENTERFORSEXUALWELLNESS.COM

{ KARMA SPEAKS }

THE STORM BY DENISE “KARMA” CLIFFORD

I remember waiting for a storm, one I thought was out beyond the horizon and flirting with the space just out of earshot. That any moment I would hear the crash of thunder in the distance scaring me into the places beneath the blankets, clutching them as if they were some sort of super hero cape that would save me from the evils I knew existed out there. In the storm, the one I kept waiting for. A child left abandoned by a father who only knew love from a whiskey bottle, and heavy hands, meant that at any moment any word, any mindless thing could unleash the eye of the storm that was then called dad. These words are not to be wasted on him, I’m talking about a storm I learned had left. Packed in his suitcase running as fast and as far away from a child he had no rights to anyway. The blessing only recognized after years of wondering what you did so wrong, or where you even belonged. Begging to be wanted by a man who taught you that trust is something you should never give away. These are not lessons little girls should learn. As a child I often wondered where I belonged and who I was. Left to feel the sting of not being wanted tastes bad for many years. I still have this aftertaste, yet have learned how to wash it down. The bitterness lingers, yet I found out what and who really matters. Weak men who were given gifts only to waste them sitting on barstools and drowning self pity in the dark stench of nicotine and ale, are like the vomit spewed into the porcelain filth of the back alley john, Not worth the spit it takes to cleanse the Palate, purging 236

itself of the guilt no amount of liquor can erase. Soothing self inflicted wounds with 2AM drunken calls to sob words of sorrow unto a child’s ears that holds onto them as truth. Only finding the next day, or week or even months the promise of a visit was just an empty threat, never to be indulged. Never being good enough to be wanted, learning that waiting for a man who left is wasted time. Time children have no business in.

But alas, the storm that never was didn’t pass all that easily. It too had its moments of unclarity, in the dense fog of always waiting, and watching. I placed myself out of sight, wondering when the drunken angry words would be followed with room shattering arguments, and heavy hands needing a place to land. I waited with wide eyes and sealed tight lips as the man whos life I was thrown into, never did any of these things. I showed up in his home, as a permanent

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

fixture and he opened his old beat up farm house to a shadow of a girl. He pointed out the one lonely chicken who strutted around the land. Told me never chase a chicken, they would keel over from a heart attack. This didnt mean that I couldn’t find away to make this chick my own personal pet. And so once I held that chicken at the front door for hours because my brother took my bike. The standoff with my mother and me and the white chicken is still an epic tale that gets passed around to this day when I go home to visit. Home, to visit. Those are normal words to most, but for me I never truly felt as though I belonged anywhere. Always waiting for the words that would have me pack my things and be gone. Waiting for that storm. For the man with the six pack of Genny between he and I as I rode shotgun in the old green chevy pickup, to tell me this was the last ride. The last time he needed me as he fired up the engine, to head on over to the town dump. To help him as a second set of eyes for anything good there. I didnt talk much, i never wanted to say the wrong thing. I would just sit with the window rolled down, my hand stuck out over the edge of the window cupping and releasing the air. We would listen to the classics on 96.5 when Brother Wease dominated those airwaves. With my hand out the window I would be told that if a bug hit my hand going 55 MPH, it woulndt feel so good. I still took my chances, I loved the way the cool breeze could be manipulated in the palm of my hand. And sometimes little puffs of wind would catch it just right and then slap my in the face and blow the hair from my eyes.

{ KARMA SPEAKS }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

237

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

238

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

KARMA SPEAKS }} {{ SHIFT+CONTROL “As a child I often wondered where I belonged and who I was. Left to feel the sting of not being wanted tastes bad for many years.”

He would tell me he needed my help, and we would go back into the woods, looking at trees. He would point out trees needing to be cut down, and trees already down. He talked to me as if i knew the difference between burning a live tree and a dead tree and the importance of finding trees this year, for next year. I was confused, yet I listened and I learned. He told me when it was hunting season to stay out of the woods, and also to never go in the woods alone. I listened to this too, but admit I didnt always hold true to that one. The woods were my playground, I could never stay away. I sat and held flashlights in the cold damp nights on engine parts and probably never shone the light on the place it was supposed to be. I handed wrench after wrench and learned the difference between a crescent wrench, a monkey wrench, and a 3/16 wrench, I learned a phillips head and a flat head screwdriver. I learned that shop talk, stayed in the shop, and that its frowned upon to show up with no shoes on your feet. I learned that when you borrow a mans tools to go make yourself a fort in the best part of the cow pasture just where that line of trees are, you shoulnt forget them there over night. I learned what it means to disappoint someone that you admire. I once was tought how to drive a tractor on a hot summer day, and was then the driver during hay season. I finally had a purpose, I was needed. I forgot about the storm, as to me even though I still felt misplaced and not sure where I belonged, I would hear the words “ you ready? I need your help.” And we would get in the old truck and head back to the woods, the dump, or out to an auction. There were times we would stop at the little gas station that sat exactly in the middle of where I used to live, and where I lived now. This old guy, Harold owned it and lived in the back,he knew my mom. She bought cigarettes there

and had gassed up her car for years. Harold always gave me a lollipop when he saw me. I remember one time in particular as I went inside behind the man who I came to follow around like a shadow. As I stood there, hoping for that sweet treat, he peered over at me, and then asked the question that I will never forget. “Hey Kerry, whos that?” and as the words hung there in the air to me what seemed like and eternity, he replied without even skipping a beat. “ Oh, thats my daughter, Denise.” And as Harold smiled and handed me the lollipop and claimed he should have known, as I walked in just like him. I didn’t know what he meant by that, but i didn’t care. We left and I was told to say hello to my mother, and i nodded. The sucker lodged into one side of my mouth making my cheek stretched out so far It felt numb, and I could barely respond. I dont know the exact moment I stopped waiting for the storm, but Im sure I wasnt too long after that. Even though for years I questioned where in life I belonged, who it was I belonged with. There was never a day that this man walked out on me. Not even when I snuck into his garage and stole beers from his fridge. Not when I left his tools outside over night. Not even when I took a plank he needed for a job, to etch the words I love you with a torch and wrap it up as a gift, did he turn his back on me. It was I who did the leaving, as to not be left abandoned. I ran as fast and as far away from words I didnt want to hear. An angry teenage girl too afraid to ask. So I left the one place I had felt safe, the one place where the clouds had shifted and when it stormed, I always knew it meant new growth, fresh water and a rainbow, somewhere out over the hills and fields and the woods I called home.

Running away never helped anyone in life, and so I went back to the place, to the person who as a child showed me that not everyone leaves. He was still there and even though my own mother was not , I was still a part of the history. A part of the story where my life panned out as a small girl who once hid amongst the shadows, now an adult. Maybe thats what Harold meant when he said I walk like him. Weak men dont run away, and I walked back into the family that I have in even the earliest of my memoires. A family that I remember long before I even moved to a place I came to know as home. I once called my little sister his “real” daughter and remember when he looked at me and said, “you are my real daughter, too.” My kids have grown up hearing stories of the little girl who ran with the cows, built forts in the fields, and made pets out of chickens. Once when my daughter was little and we were eating dinner, out of the blue, she looked at me for a long minute and says “but mom, where is your real dad?” I paused and almost talked of the man who doesnt deserve these words. I smiled and said “Ella, you know hes out there at the farm, probably in the garage, working on something.” she said nothing else. Went back to eating like nothing even happened. But it did, I knew then that the storm I had waited so long for, was nothing more than a glimpse of clouds out over the lake. One too weak to make it to shore. Dedicated to DOT, my real dad. The strongest man I know.

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

239

{ SHIFT+CONTROL KURVIE KORNER }}

KURVIE KUEENS TOP 10 FALL MUST HAVES BY LATIFFANY ANDERSON

My favorite season fall has arrived, and I wanted to share with you all my top 10 fall must haves. As you all know, I live self-care, and doing whatever makes me feel good. All of these items are conduits to my happiness. My faves allow me to create a space of positive energy, and free flowing thoughts. I hope I can introduce you to new items that you can add to your fall faves. Every aspect of Kurvie Korner is about healing and empowering from the inside out. My Fall faves are no different. My first fave is me time. My me time combines several of my fall favorites. ME time is a time designated for you, and only you. No work, no children, no spouse, no social media unless that is how you unwind. My fall essentials that are included in my me time include books, tea, and listening to a podcast. I like to dive into a variety of genres. I am currently reading poetry books as well as books on plant care. My next fave is Tea. For me its soothing daily sit and sip. Depending on the type, tea can provide several health benefits. There are several brands have blends that assist in sleep, cold care, and digestion. My love of tea fueled me to begin my own tea line a few years ago. Kueen tea is hand blended to assist in whole self-care and relaxation. Kueen Tea will relaunch in 2021. My final me time fall fave is listening to podcasts. Podcasts have soared in popularity over the past few years. The key is to find topics, hosts, and genres that you enjoy. Two of my favorites are Therapy for black girls and The Fred show (waiting by the phone). Therapy for black girls is a podcast that has sessions with topics such as “mental health tasks to prioritize”, “making friends as adults” and so much more. The Fred show is a hilarious 240

podcast based on the radio shows call ins. Callers want to know why a person they went on a date with will not answer the phone or call them back. When I need a moment to myself to just breathe both of these podcasts are my go-tos. Both of my podcast selections can be found on Spotify. With the upsurge of COVID-19 I became more diligent with taking vitamins. Beyond taking them, I began to research immune system boosters. Daily I take Goli Gummies,

Black elderberry, Olive leaf, turmeric and Echinacea. Each of these can be found at any local pharmacy with the exception of the Goli gummies. Goli can be found on their website as well as Walmart.com Now that we have taken care of all of my inner fall must haves, let’s explore the outer. Fall fashion is my favorite to experiment with. Colors like mustard, wine, hunter and royal are all my favorites to put together. My final five fall must haves are leggings, cardigans, boots, expressive eyewear, and

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

body/ skin care essentials. I love to express my personality and self-love through the art of fashion. Most days my style is simple with splashes of sass. I love to pair pops of color with solid pieces, then there are days where I boldly wear prints. Fall gives us the opportunity to play with mixing winter and summer attire. Leggings are a closet must have. They can be dressed up or down and can be worn by everyone. Cardigans are my next fave. They can be worn to work, date nights and can be paired with almost anything in your closet. Fall boots are one of my absolute favorite statement pieces. Most of my boots are purchased from Justfab. If I am not wearing leggings or cardigans from Kurvie Kulture, I have found some leggings that are very plus size friendly at Walmart. Lately, I have found myself loving the idea of a variety of different glasses. Wearing glasses no longer has to be a daunting task. I love a colorful, bold frame. They are a creative way to enhance your fall fashion. As the weather changes to colder in most areas, the importance for body and skin care becomes even more prevalent. All of my skin care needs are taken care of by “Goddes Glow” products. To ensure my body stays moisturized, I use Goddess Glow fall scents such as brown sugar baby body oil. To keep my skin clear and glowing I use the turmeric face wash, rose water toner, and face serum. Goddess Glow located at 510 state street in Rochester NY, offers affordable self-care essentials for every woman. Fall is a time for expression, renewal, and of course self-care. Take time for yourself and add one or all of my fall faves to your list.

KARMA SPEAKS }} {{ SHIFT+CONTROL

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

241

B.MOR }} B. MORTALKS {{ SHE SHE{{HUSTLES HUSTLES TALKS }

MARKETING MIX BY BRE MORRIS

I remember it like it was yesterday…I was sitting in my first-ever marketing class my freshman year of college and I opened up my Marketing 101 book. It was like everything inside the pages came to life for me—I loved reading about branding, strategy and how to build a marketing plan. This is also when I learned about the marketing mix and the four P’s of marketing: product, price, promotion, and place. Who knew then that those 4 little words would shape my future? Well, today I’m going to share a closer look at each of the components in the mix because identifying each of these for your brand could also shape your future marketing success!

• What need is my product or service satisfying? • How and in what way will the customer use it? • What sets my product or service aside from the competition? What makes it unique? • What other products or services are in

• What is the value of this product or service to the customer? • What is my established price list for my goods or services?

IDENTIFYING THE FOUR P’S: Product—This refers to either the tangible good or service that you provide.

• How much is it costing me to make this or provide this service?

Price—How much does the product or service cost for you to make/provide and how much are you charging the client.

• How much do I need to be making to ensure it’s worth my while and to align with my business model?

Promotion—Simply put, how are you sharing the word about your product/service? Place/Distribution—Where will you sell your product or service? This refers to the point of sale or distribution of your good or service. PUTTING THEM INTO ACTION: Product—Whether you’re new in the business or have a successful brand already, it’s always beneficial to go back to the root of what your product or service is. Start by asking yourself a few questions: 242

research to answer these questions, you’re well on your way to properly identifying your specific product. It’s crucial to take the temperature of the market you’re entering so that then you can best identify what sets you apart and most importantly WHO your ideal customer is that you intend to target. Price—Identifying the price is to recognize the value that you’re providing to the customer while also taking a closer look at what you need to be making to ensure this business venture is worth your while. Let’s do this by asking a few price related questions:

direct competition with me? • What are my general branding guidelines? • What type of product/service do I want to provide? Quality over quantity? • Who do I want to purchase my product? Is this a necessity for them or a luxury? Through doing the internal and external

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

• Where does my pricing fall in comparison with the competition? • Will I offer segmented pricing for wholesale or other targeted markets? Working hard on the numbers side of your product or service is incredibly important. If you’re manufacturing a product, set attainable goals to determine how you can cut costs while still providing the quality your customers are used to and deserve!

{HUSTLES B.MOR TALKS } } } { RECOVERX {{ SHE SHE HUSTLES TALKS

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

243

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

244

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ B.MOR } { SHIFT+CONTROL } “I hope that this has helped give you a better understanding into how you can use the marketing mix as a tool for launching, rebranding or re-aligning your business goals.”

Same goes for the service industry—what resources can you use to save time and money to provide the best results? Promotion—Get your megaphones ready because this is the fun part! Sharing your story has never been more important (than now) and creating the right and relevant content/channels to do it through should be at the forefront of your to-do list! Let’s dive deeper into this:

best place for your good or service to be offered is a key piece to the puzzle. If you have something unique, look into what distribution channels will allow you to get in front of that specific audience. If you have a common household good, perhaps Amazon or an online platform is best. Lastly, would your product be best displayed in a brick and mortar storefront? Finding a home for your brand may be easier than you think, let’s ask some key questions:

• Where is your target market looking for information? By looking at their demographic you can best determine what channel/medium you should utilize to get in front of them. • Timing-when is the best time to promote your product? Is it a seasonal offering or based on higher sales during a particular time of year? • What’s the climate of the world and what’s in the news? Believe it or not, this plays a big role in your promotion strategy. Always adjust your marketing efforts based on how you can meet folks where they’re at and best help satisfy a need. • What type of promotion are your competitors doing? How can you stand out? Some common and most popular forms of promotion today are: Social media, website/blogging, public relations and Google ad words. Place/Distribution—Determining the 246

• Where are other similar items/services being sold? • Do you prefer to utilize a physical storefront, online sales, or both? • Who else could you align with to offer your good/service in their existing space? • What does the price of shipping and handling look like and how can you best

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

get your product into the hands of your customer? • What criteria must be met for particular e-commerce sites? • Do you have a working website that best portrays your brand (this is super important!) While the place portion of the marketing mix may represent the physical or online point of sale, it’s also very important to realize that the main place that folks will go for information you’re your website) must be a clear representation of your brand. Invest in a user-friendly, easily updateable, mobile friendly and appealing website. It makes all the difference when you’re introducing your brand to the world! I hope that this has helped give you a better understanding into how you can use the marketing mix as a tool for launching, rebranding or re-aligning your business goals. When you put in the work, use the right combination of ingredients in the mix and take the time to do it right the first time—you’re bound to have great results!

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

The official blog of b.mor! Marketing & Consulting

ROC native, lover of all things brand and marketing related, foodie, wifey, mama, and baking enthusiast. CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

247

248

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

249

{ LOCAL BUSINESS MATTERS } { SHIFT+CONTROL }

250

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ WELL TRAIL } } { SHIFT+CONTROL

REACHING YOUR PEAK BY KELLI LAPAGE

This October I spent a lot of time along the Route 81 corridor and Pennsylvania turnpike. Despite the “peak foliage” map predictions I have been surprised to see wide variations in peak colors – both north to south and east to west. Interestingly, these variations do not exclusively follow the patterns predicted by the foliage maps (which are based on latitude and elevation and temperature ranges, among other variables). Instead I found unexpected patches of color between stretches of all greenery or mostly dropped leaves. Some northern areas had not begun to change colors while some areas further south were already beyond their peak. Several times a week for the last month I have observed these changing patterns with amazement and appreciation for the beauty in every one of the phases, wherever and whenever they occurred. These colorful trips have been a reminder that we are all constantly moving through phases – in success, in health, in life in general. Some are expected at certain ages, or in concurrence with specific events. Some are expected when variables change or are intentionally adjusted. We ebb and flow like the leaves, expecting peaks at certain intervals, but often find ourselves surprised

(or disappointed) because a peak is not happening when we expect it to. Healthy actions always have multiple potential positive outcomes. Some are visible, some are physical, some are mental, and some are physiological and not easily observed unless you are looking REALLY closely. Just

like the difference in peak foliage, there are always multiple variables that contribute to how potential outcomes manifest. Leaves change based on obvious factors like the type of tree, where its located (further north vs south) and local temperature patterns. But they are also greatly affected by things we cannot always

see or consider: the quality of the soil, the amount of sunlight a tree receives, the depth and breadth of its root system, and even the presence of foreign invaders in the form of insects or other pests. As I drive across the northeast each week, I do not know what each tree or forest region’s subtle variables are. All I see are the beautiful changing colors that surround me. What I do know is that trees in peak on my drive today will likely be brown or bare by the time I drive through again next week. And I know that the trees that are still lush and green will be showing hints of color next week, and in two to three weeks will be the most beautiful ones in the landscape. What IS a constant, is that there will always be change. If there is one thing I have learned during my past 30 years in the healthcare industry, it’s that no two people are the same. You can place two people in a similar environment with the same variables and have two different outcomes. 20 people enrolled in the same program following the same diet and exercise plan will have vastly different rates of change and differing end results. Sometimes changes in our health are in response to recognizable external forces – good

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

251

{ SHIFT+CONTROL { WELL TRAIL } } “Recognize that it may take you more time to reach your “peak” than it takes other people. That’s ok. Don’t compare yourself to the other trees in the forest.”

or bad. And sometimes, despite thorough investigation, we simply cannot explain WHY one person may see faster or more pronounced results, while another notices minimal change. And so in the absence of recognizing an obvious “success” variable, we often turn to comparing ourself to others: that person is able to lift more than I can, my coworker is losing more weight than I am, my best friend looks great in her bikini and I’m still struggling with my postpartum weight gain, my partner has more energy even though we are eating the same things… And with that comparison often comes judgement – judgement that we must be at fault – that WE must be doing something wrong because our results are not as rapid, as pronounced or as obvious as the person next to us. And blame turns to frustration, and frustration all too often turns to giving up the healthy actions all together. There are several ways we can avoid falling into this trap. Doing the right things for our body (good fuel, activity, rest, hydration to name a few) will ALWAYS provide benefits – just as a proper balance of sun and rain and good soil will provide the optimal environment for the growth of a healthy tree. But those benefits may not always be the ones we expected (or hoped for) and they may not always be visible within the time frame we think they should be. I always remind the person I am coaching to consider ALL of the 252

benefits they will get from committing to a healthy action. For example, if someone wants to lose weight, the question really is “what do you expect to happen when you lose weight/ hit your goal weight?” Most people will identify a number of areas that will improve: increased energy, more confidence, less joint pain, being able to do activities they can’t currently do, reduce their risk for a disease, reduce the need for medications they take… the list can go on and on. Why is this important? Because what if you achieve those goals – but the weight doesn’t change, or doesn’t hit the goal number you want? The truth is, success is not determined by what we see on a scale, rather by how we feel. Recognize that it may take you more time to reach your “peak” than it takes other people. That’s ok. Don’t compare yourself to the other trees in the forest. Just compare yourself to where you were the day before. Your path is yours alone. Celebrate the positive changes that happen along the way, not the speed at which you make them. Be aware of variables that may affect your success. You have to be open – and non judgmental – to identify and consider risk factors and behaviors that may negatively affect your outcomes and goals. If you are stressed out, not sleeping, not following through on doctor recommendations for medication or testing… then it is possible that improvements in diet or exercise may NOT have their

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

intended positive effects. So do not blindly follow someone else’s plan without making sure that all YOUR variables are managed to the best of your ability. Accomplishment of a health goal – or even personal goal – will be achieved relative to all the variables that make us who we are. Health is personal – so the solutions must be personal as well. Remember that achieving your “peak” for whatever goal you are working on is not the end of the climb, but the beginning of the next phase of your journey. Appreciate the beauty in every season and recognize its purpose. For after the radiant colors of fall have faded, and the trees are bare and the ground is white, you know that the trees are preparing behind the scenes and underground to emerge again and start all over in the spring. And so too will we continue to experience the seasons of our own physical and mental growth and progress. So enjoy the colors along the way! Kelli LaPage and WellTrail provide individual and organizational health and injury management consulting services throughout the state of NY, and surrounding regions. If you would like more information you can contact Kelli at klapage@welltrail.com

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

253

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

254

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

255

{ SEEING THE SIGNS }

DECEMBER 2020 BY ANGELA MCGHEE

ARIES DECEMBER 2020 Career and friendships become mega important this month but knowing when to keep them seperate is key. Both areas have a degree of allowing you to move forward for personal gain. In true Christmas spirit, you see the necessity to take up a humanitarian course where one is close to your heart. If you are single you might meet someone on a similar spiritual path, which may be the beginning of a new venture together. TAURUS DECEMBER 2020 Jupiter promises growth this month in your work. If your work has a charitable connection doors will open for more responsibility. A solar eclipse arrives in your 8th house of intimacy and joint finances where you will reap rewards in both areas. Someone mysterious is entering your life but you will find out that it is not all cloak and smokescreens as it’s someone as down to earth as you. GEMINI DECEMBER 2020 There is a cosmic shift mid December, you may attract an oracle who will help feed your mind expansion. There is an area of study which beckons you and how you look upon the world will change. New love is highlighted this month and you may meet that certain person you want to spend your future with. Everyone has a book inside of them and this is the time to get your ideas down on paper. 256

CANCER DECEMBER 2020 It’s time to put your financial house in order. You’ve been struggling to make ends meet but you’re usually an expert juggler. There is an opportunity to benefit you from outside of your regular resources. It can arrive in the guise of an unexpected gift or inheritance as an extra income opportunity arises. It hasn’t been easy for you in relationships of late as Saturn leaves your partnership sector but it is a clearing to lead a way forward. As for singletons, a fresh start is on the horizon. The month ends on a very sentimental note more so because of the rollercoaster you’ve been on. LEO DECEMBER 2020 This month you will recognise karmic connections being created with a love interest. It’s time to get your house in order in regards to discipline and commitments as you may recognise the relationship you’re in doesn’t have those solid foundations. If you are single you could be dating someone you will become engaged too. This month, it’s time to clear all the emotional baggage that isn’t serving you and start over again. VIRGO DECEMBER 2020 For someone who prides themselves on their organisational skills, you will have an opportunity to use these skills in other areas of your life. Expect unexpected blessings as opportunities come your way to

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

give you a genuine sense of purpose in life as you are particular in what work you do, but nevertheless you will give it your all. Your health needs more attention, learning how to heal yourself is essential. For those seeking love, dating restrictions and prospects will begin to lift. LIBRA DECEMBER 2020 If you’ve been carrying the extra weight of family responsibilities it’s great news, things will begin to lift. It’s time to take a good look at yourself in the mirror and see the beauty in all that you do. Romance is on the cards and it’s time to check your checklist and make radical changes to see where you have been going wrong. With the full moon at the end of December you could be put on the top of someone’s list for a professional position. SCORPIO DECEMBER 2020 It’s time to get your house into order and surround yourself with people who are good for you. It’s also time to change your environment if you’re not happy with the colour scheme of things. Changing appearances has a good way of uplifting your spirit. There is a chance to welcome visitors who have visited from afar. Extra celebrations are in order as someone close celebrates a promotion. Finances look the best they’ve been for a few months now as every cloud has a silver lining.

{ SEEING THE SIGNS } “ ARIES DECEMBER 2020 Career and friendships become mega important this month but knowing when to keep them seperate is key. Both areas have a degree of allowing you to move forward for personal gain”

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

257

{ SEEING THE SIGNS } “AQUARIUS DECEMBER 2020 There is a massive shift in a number of houses with Aquarius. You will take full responsibility for your life and you will move in a direction you’ve always wanted.”

SAGITTARIUS DECEMBER 2020 You’ve made a lot of effort lately putting your finances in order, now is the time for light relief. Saturn is now moving into the area of your chart connected to communication and learning. You may team up with someone who values you and your talents. Your ever increasing entrepreneurship will make you a top expert in an area but extra study will be needed. It is a major turning point to becoming well established. You have a magnetism that shows the world what you’re truly made of. CAPRICORN DECEMBER 2020 It’s time to hold onto your purse strings and cut down on unnecessary spending, budgeting is the word. You are putting plans together to make next year more financial stable. With the full moon in your relationship, it deepens your commitment and emotional connection. If you are in a relationship where you don’t feel you are being nurtured, now is the time to 258

bring this to your partners attention. It’s time to use Christmas to reinvent your looks for the upcoming year. AQUARIUS DECEMBER 2020 There is a massive shift in a number of houses with Aquarius. You will take full responsibility for your life and you will move in a direction you’ve always wanted. This is a defining time to lay down foundations to who you really are. You are acquiring an amount of blessings. Your sun sign shines for an entire year, with exceptional personal growth ahead. A new love in your life will make the greatest impact, so be ready for this cosmic kick. PISCES DECEMBER 2020 It’s time to address what’s holding you back and face your fears and sort out emotional feelings that you’ve carried for a long time. A good time to let go. It is also a time for psychic and spiritual development. Major career opportunities are on the top of your

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

chart after 14th December so grab the opportunity with both hands. A full moon in your love sector at the end of the month could make you look at your relationship on a deeper level. It’s time to change it or leave it. Christmas Blessings and a Prosperous New Year. Love and Light Angela McGhee

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

259

{ TRAVEL WITH AGNESS { SHIFT+CONTROL } }

A WEEKEND IN BUFFALO BY RANDY AGNESS - WINEMAKER

I miss watching Buffalo Bills Football games live and tailgating from the break of day until the final ticks of the game clock. But if you’re looking for nightlife in Buffalo New York you have enter what has become the new food and dining mecca in Western NY. Emerging from the more than three months shutdown of fine dining in restaurants, two places have caught the eye and the pallete of this frequent traveller. Hutch’s has been redefining city dining and is very wellknown by the locals near Delaware Avenue near Gates Circle along wide a wider scope far beyond the greater Buffalo region for the past twenty-five years. Onwer Mark Hutchinson had taken the bold move of re-inventing the entire restaurant stripping it down completely over the pause and doubling the outdoor dining space and the same to the interior layout of the restaurant and creating a spectatorly modern concept unmatched in the city. Found in the kitchen nearly every night, Mark Hutchinson or Hutch is about the fine details combining taste and presentation of the cruise on the menu The expanded space allows for an additional upscale bar providing unique cocktails and an extensive wine list covering selections to pair with each entrée. Mark calls the menu 260

“An American Take along the lines of a French Bistro with small plate options in abundance. And leave room for home -made delicious and decadent dssert options! The unplanned Covid 19 has changed the entire restaurant industry completely leaving many owners without capacity

to survive once customers were ready to return to fine dining. We planned to expand and in doing so created the seating arrangements necessary to comply with social distancing, yet at the same time greatly enhancd the dining experience for our guests. When traveling to Buffalo, Hutch’s is a definite must stop as a joy for all your senses..

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

Jazzboline Restaurant and Bar has a most interesting history. Built as the Reikart House by Frank and Dolly Reikart former Vauderville performers who relocated to Amherst New York. Yet, their talent and deep desire to entertain remained. With the pet Capuchin monkey Jocko, the Reikart’s continuesd to host and delight the locals quickly becoming known as the first family of Amherst. Among, Frank’s talent was being a luthier or instrument designer. He created many musical instruments including the most popular Jazzboline that angular shape played like a banjo. And the spirit of their vision lives on. Jazzboline is very quickly become one of Buffalo’s boldest and fun new fine dining experiences that captures headlines and the attention of the restaurant critics as well as not only the residents of Amherst and everyone that walks thru the doors. The path to the dining arena alone immediately sets the tonewhen viewing a stunning wall of wine greeting the guests and exciting their pallete. On Main Street at the first exit off the 290 and easily accessible which has lead to the fastest growing numbers since just opening in September 2019.

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

261

{ SHIFT+CONTROL } } { TRAVEL WITH AGNESS “Jazzboline is very quickly become one of Buffalo’s boldest and fun new fine dining experiences that captures headlines and the attention of the restaurant critics as well as not only the residents of Amherst and everyone that walks thru the doors.”

Jazzboline on-site with the Reikhart House Boutique Hotel which offers convenient and unique weekend get-away packages. And the food from start to finish from the Jazzboline’s talented culinary team creating amazingly delicious entrées in a stylist departure from American cuisine along with outstanding craft cocktails, a generous selection of local beers and of course 262

a great number of fabulous wines. The staff and service are beyond any conception of friendliness in a fun and simply beautiful atmosphere. General Manager Charlie Barone runs this show daily like a conductor of exquistedly professional cast for your total enjoyment. As mentioned about, Jazzboline is a highly recommended destination restaurant for visitor to the

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

Buffalo area and one of my favorite place to dine whenever traveling to Buffalo.

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

{ TRACY IS TALKING }

EACH ONE TEACH ONE BY TRACY SIMONE

In our days of microwave ovens, internet access, instant purchases online and anything we want being delivered directly to our homes, many of us have lost sight of the good old days. While we were all jockeying for position trying to keep up with the Joneses (or maybe even being the Joneses), we let some of our core skills and talents slip away. Some of us still have them and carry on the traditions of days gone by, but we did not always take the time to pass them along to the next generations.

and make them last even longer. We do not even recognize real food anymore, which tends to be smaller, imperfect looking, and spoils much faster. Back in the day, people knew how to grow all their own food, cook

If you know how to do something, you should share the knowledge with someone else, especially younger people. Gone are the days when most things were homemade. I remember taking Home Economics in middle school where Mrs. Cleary taught us how to follow a pattern and use a sewing machine for half of the year. During the other half, she taught us how to follow a recipe, safely use a stove, and make good things to eat.

Who still knows how to can food, knit, sew, garden, make minor car or home repairs, make soap, woodwork, or similar things? Collectively, have we really spent enough time and energy teaching others how to be self-sufficient? Most of us cannot even do things that our own grandparents could. We live in what has become quite the throwaway society. Many people buy or lease a new car every 2 or 3 years mainly because they are bored, another new model came out, or because someone else got one first. How many people have we seen wait in line outside of a store to get the new Nike sneakers or iPhone, just to pay too much because they had to be among the first to get them? How silly and wasteful our society has become. Our older generations used things until they were no longer viable. Then, they would patch them 264

of the wifi being shut off. They used to ride their bikes and be back in the house by the time the streetlights came on or they would be met again with that wooden spoon. Now, many of them text each other within the same room! Their thumbs fly across the keypad with lightning speed, but they do not know how to hold an actual conversation.

things from scratch, and whack someone with a wooden spoon who dared try to taste test before it was ready. Cook a whole meal today? I literally know adults who do not own a stove. Yikes! We used to make our own clothes, barter with each other for items, and carry a sense of pride for doing things ourselves. Today, most kids will stop dead in their tracks at the mere thought

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

My godmother patiently taught me how to crochet when I was young, and I have put that skill to work on several projects since then. We all should feel a sense of duty, an obligation in fact, to help someone outside of ourselves. We would not be where we are if it were not for others. Someone along the way helped us somehow to get where we are today. There were people and experiences that have taught us lessons, both good and bad, throughout our lives. We owe it to others, especially the youth, to pass along knowledge and to help create a better world and build their confidence.

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

265

{ TRACY TALKS } â&#x20AC;&#x153;While we were all jockeying for position trying to keep up with the Joneses (or maybe even being the Joneses), we let some of our core skills and talents slip away.â&#x20AC;?

Instead of worrying about likes and shares online, we want to have people who have a great sense of self-esteem and confidence in knowing that with a little work, they can produce something with their own hands. They can grow a tomato, or play the piano, or catch a fish. Something. We have lost a lot of the basics that used to define how we lived. People need to know how to be more self-reliant. Children need to know how to do things for 266

themselves and not be so dependent on stores, the internet, and even mom and dad. Remember that couple on the news a few years back who had to sue their middle-aged son who would not move out of their house? That was an extreme case, but they certainly failed to teach him any life skills. We have students who graduate from high school and cannot write in cursive or balance a checkbook. What happened

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

to all the life skills? It is great to have modern conveniences, but everyone needs to also have some of the old-fashioned skills that will always come in handy. Each one, teach one.

SHOP ENTIRE COLLECTION & VIEW BUSINESS OPPORTUNITY MYGRACEANDHEART.COM/KIMKSHYNA JOIN MY VIP GROUP SPARKLE WITH KIM KSHYNA TO CHECK OUT SALES & GIVEAWAYS WWW.FACEBOOK.COM/GROUPS/816384885436955/

{ PARTNERS IN A JOURNEY }

SALUTING SEVEN WOMEN BY OLGA MONICELL

OF THE 2020 WALK TO END ALZHEIMER’S This year, the Walk to End Alzheimer’s was everywhere. Instead of hosting large gatherings in Canandaigua, Elmira and Rochester, the Alzheimer’s Association encouraged its supporters to walk in small groups of friends and family on sidewalks and trails across the entire region. Hundreds of small but mighty walks took place in local parks and neighborhoods during three weekends in October. More than 1,000 participants registered for the Finger Lakes, Southern Tier and Rochester events, raising $350,000 for dementia care, support and research. The 2020 events in Canandaigua, Elmira and Rochester were powered by volunteers. Although the Walk looked different, one thing had not changed—the commitment of our volunteers to ending Alzheimer’s and all other dementia. We asked seven women—Shelby Ascroft of Canandaigua, Riesa Cassano of Pittsford, Deborah Danko of Elmira, Lois Williams Norman of Webster, Rola O’Meally of Gates, Amy Rominger of Elmira, and Kim Smith of Victor—to share with us why they volunteer for the Walk to End Alzheimer’s. Shelby Ascroft chaired the Finger Lakes Walk to End Alzheimer’s planning committee, rallying more than 360 participants and helping raise $80,000. Shelby created inspiring videos and social messages to encourage her fellow 268

participants to step up their game. With help from her children Nora and Cade, she “planted” the view-only Promise Garden at Granger Homestead for the Oct. 3 Walk in Canandaigua. Shelby became involved in the Walk to End Alzheimer’s in honor of her grandfather who lived with dementia. “He was the strongest man I know. To me, he was 7-foot tall,” said Shelby. As a nurse, Deborah Danko is dealing with dementia both professionally and

personally. Her father Jim Lynch is living with Alzheimer’s disease. “My father was the life of the party with his big Irish smile. All of that has changed. He has stopped volunteering, going to church and driving. In the last few months, his disease has progressed very quickly. He has good days when he thinks he is going to work and bad days when he doesn’t talk,” said Deborah. “This year, I joined the volunteer planning committee and on October 17, my family and friends participated in the

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

Walk to End Alzheimer’s for the first time. Thank you all for your advocacy on behalf of families like ours,” she added. Kimberly Smith took part in the planning of the Finger Lakes Walk in memory of her mother Lorraine Stepien Szul, who lived with younger-onset dementia and passed away just a month shy of her 65th birthday. “She loved her grandchildren. You could truly see Mom lighten up when she saw or heard her grandchildren, even at the end,” said Kim. “I walk and raise funds because I want to help find a cure for this horrible disease and support families that are going through this however I can,” she added. Lois Williams Norman, a board member of the Alzheimer’s Association, Rochester and Finger Lakes Region Chapter, has been advocating for underrepresented and underserved communities affected by dementia for more than 10 years. She participates in the Walk and volunteers on the Rochester planning committee in memory of her parents, both of whom lived with dementia. “I help raise funds to advance dementia research and promote earlier detection. I hope that we can have the first survivor in my lifetime,” said Lois. Riesa Cassano and her parents joined the Walk to End Alzheimer’s for the first time this year. They walked in memory of Riesa’s grandmother Anne Yard who lived with symptoms of memory loss and

{{ CNY INSPIRING WOMAN } PARTNERS IN A JOURNEY

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

269

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

270

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

271

{ PARTNERS IN A JOURNEY { SHIFT+CONTROL } } “We salute all women who, despite unprecedented challenges caused by the pandemic, helped us rally hundreds of participants and make this year’s Walk to End Alzheimer’s a success.”

died of a stroke a few years ago. In July and August, while on summer break from her undergraduate studies at Princeton University, Riesa also volunteered at the Alzheimer’s Association. She helped spray-chalk Promise Garden flowers on the driveways of Walk participants who won a summer fundraising challenge. Promise Garden flowers symbolize a person’s connection to dementia— blue flowers stand for someone living with dementia, yellow flowers signify someone who is a caregiver, purple flowers mean a loss of a loved one to dementia, and orange flowers represent a 272

commitment to the Association’s vision of a world without Alzheimer’s and all other dementia. Both Rola O’Meally and Amy Rominger held orange flowers as they walked this year. For several years, Rola has been a Walk participant and Alzheimer’s Association volunteer, helping plan the Rochester event. She is the captain of St. Ann’s Community team, one of the largest corporate teams. “We care for many residents who are affected by Alzheimer’s disease or another form of dementia. I am very committed to the fight against dementia. By raising awareness and money, we help to advance research toward a cure,” said Rola. Amy

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

Rominger volunteered with the planning committee of the Southern Tier Walk. “As an audiologist, I participate in the Walk to honor my patients, many of whom are living with both hearing loss and dementia,” said Amy. We salute all women who, despite unprecedented challenges caused by the pandemic, helped us rally hundreds of participants and make this year’s Walk to End Alzheimer’s a success. To learn more, visit alz.org/walk. -end-

{ SHIFT+CONTROL } Are you caring for a family member who is living with dementia at home or in a long-term care community? Connect with other dementia caregivers from your area. Join a support group.

ALZ

Call 800.272.39001-800-272-3900 or visit www.alz.org to learn about our telephone and online support groups.

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

273

274

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

{ LET’S MEETTALKS } { SHE HUSTLES TALKS }}

FREDDIE ROBINSON BY MICHELLE DIBERNARDO

Meet Freddie Robinson Jr. from Love & Hip Hop I had the pleasure of working with Freddie on Cash Cow Films, feature film, “Dammit Man” which premiered at CitiPlex 12 in Newark, NJ back in March of this year. Of course, this was a comedy and well my 2nd sex scene, not sure about Mr. Robinson. Freddie Robinson is an actor, comedian, producer, musician, innovator, and entrepreneur. With more than a dozen inventions, patents, and artistic creations under his belt Freddie is truly a man of many faces. Freddie hails from the gritty streets of Jersey City, New Jersey just across from Lower Manhattan and the Hudson River. Freddie claimed his destiny early on in his life beginning in grammar school when he starred in his first stage play with the National Dance Institute (NDI). It was on that stage that a dream was born. His stint with the NDI led to his dance role in the movie Off Beat feat actor Judge Reinhold. After high school, Freddie joined a singing group called “4Matt” managed by Queen Latifah and Flavor Unit Management and signed under Motown Records through Naughty by Nature’s production company Illtown Records. The group recorded two albums while together under Motown and an album with Warner Bros. Freddie also cowrote the Illtown Family’s Real Christmas song with Grammy Award-winning singer and songwriter Gordon Chambers which still plays on regular rotation on BET and other stations during the holiday season. Acting after the group dissolved Freddie decided to pursue his acting career full time as well as nurturing a budding career

in music production. While producing a local artist he gained the attention of Motown Productions president, Suzanne de Passe, the woman who discovered the Jackson 5. Shortly after, through his independent initiatives, he earned the opportunity to work with the late singer Aaliyah for the Sunset Park soundtrack, Queen Latifah, Jim Jones, and Mama Jones of (Love & Hip Hop). Having starred in several school plays throughout high school, it was not until later that Freddie would make major strides in acting. After submitting his photo to an

agency, he was immediately called back to go on several casting calls, landing his very first job doing a voiceover for Reebok sneakers. Freddie’s first major role wouldn’t come until a couple of years later when he landed a role on NBC’s long-time running and Emmy Awardwinning series Law & Order. Shortly thereafter, he crossed paths with director Sidney Lumet who was directing A&E’s 100 Centre Street who immediately was impressed by Freddie’s talent and booked him for a role. Soon Freddie found himself

auditioning before Actor and Director Alec Baldwin for a role in Shortcut to Happiness. In this film, he starred in scenes opposite Sir Anthony Hopkins, Jennifer Love Hewitt, Alec Baldwin, Kim Cattrall, and Dan Aykroyd. This role was followed by a lead role in the movie Life Outside of Pearl with Haitian actor Jimmy Jean-Louis and a guest role in 50 Cent’s “Put Ya Hands Up” music video which now has over eight million 8,000,000 views. Comedy / TV has always been a part of Freddie’s personality, therefore after constant encouragement from his supporters, he decided to do theatre and graced several major stages such as The Historical Loew’s Theater in Jersey City and received rave reviews from his performance. Additionally, he has appeared on two seasons of VH1’s Love & Hip Hop and an entire season of VH1″s Chrissy & Mr. Jones both bringing in the view’s in the millions. Freddie has a multitude of talents, which include a great eye for talent and a good ear for music. His goal is to utilize his accomplishments while assisting others in fulfilling their entertainment dreams, whether music, television or theatre. Currently, Freddie is producing music for the new seasons of Love and Hip Hop and Love and Hip Hop (ATL). Be sure to follow Freddie on all his social handles. Also if interested in booking his email is below or contact DiBernardoProductionsLLC@Gmail. com, serious inquiries only! Tw i t t e r. c o m / f re d d i e r o b i n s o n / status/13173983724 Instagram: @freddierobinson FaceBook: www.facebook.com/ freddierobinsonjr Bookings: bookingfreddie@gmail.com

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

275

{ MENTALLY THINKING }

INCREASED ANXIETY BY BONNIE FLOYD

We’re all finding ourselves dealing with increased anxiety symptoms these days, for a very wide variety of reasons. First of all, we are living in unprecedented times, due to the enormity of dealing with the all-encompassing COVID-19 pandemic. As a clinical psychologist, I strongly believe that the single most stressful aspect of this pandemic is that it has no definitive endpoint. Put another way, none of us knows how much longer we will need to cope with what we’re coping. Our nation also finds itself dealing with continued unrest due to prolonged racial tensions. The upcoming presidential election is deeply polarizing, too. These factors all contribute to the increased severity of anxiety. Individuals without histories of anxiety disorders are developing these disorders for the very first time. Those with pre-existing histories of anxiety are noticing that they’re experiencing increased severities of symptoms. A recent study has asserted that fully one in three Americans currently meet the diagnostic criteria for a diagnosis of depression and/or anxiety. Contrary to popular opinion, depressive disorders are not the most prevalent type of mental health disorder. Anxiety disorders are the most common type of disorder affecting our mental health. Anxiety may manifest in multiple different ways. We may find it much more difficult to fall asleep, for example. We may also experience changes in our 276

appetite, such as developing a reduced appetite or overeating to obtain brief emotional relief. Rates of smoking and substance abuse are also correlated with increased anxiety. n addition, we may develop nervous habits, such as compulsive nail biting, when our anxiety level becomes excessive. Anxiety typically impairs our focus and

concentration, too. By not paying sufficient attention to material, we may fail to adequately encode it, or place it into our memory stores. Subsequently, such information is not accessible at a later point in time. Therefore, what appears to be a memory deficit may more accurately reflect impaired attention. A certain degree of anxiety is certainly adaptive. For example, feeling anxious

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

about an upcoming test motivates us to be better prepared to take that test. Feeling anxious about the possibility of getting into a car accident motivates us to drive defensively. Feeling anxious about incurring late fees motivates us to pay our bills on time. The key is to maintain an optimal, rather than an excessive, level of anxiety. There are a wide variety of anxiety disorders. Individuals may suffer from panic attacks, with or without agoraphobia. Some individuals develop Generalized Anxiety Disorder, where they develop increased anxiety about a very wide range of situations. Sometimes anxiety is manifested in the development of posttraumatic stress disorder. Some individuals develop specific phobia as a manifestation of anxiety. Others develop obsessive-compulsive disorder. Furthermore, increased anxiety may manifest as social anxiety disorder. Each of these types of anxiety disorders require professional intervention, through use of psychotropic medications and/or reception of psychotherapy. The best results are achieved with a combination of these treatment modalities. Shortterm, solution-focused psychotherapy sessions can equip individuals with the development of improved skills to manage anxiety more effectively. Cognitive-behavioral therapy is another effective treatment modalities to address a variety of anxiety disorders.

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

277

{ {RWO’S MENTALLY MENTAL THINKING HEALTH} } “ Journaling our thoughts and feelings is yet another useful means of managing increased anxiety.”

I’m currently encountering many online clients who are seeking therapy for the very first time in their lives, due to their experience of heightened anxiety levels. Many online clients are anxious about trying to juggle the competing demands of working from home and assisting their children with online instruction. The geriatric residents with whom I meet each week are also feeling increased anxiety; many of them are very worried about the possibility of contracting COVID-19, given their pre-existing conditions. The nursing home personnel are also more anxious than usual, given their increased work demands during our global pandemic. 278

Psychotherapeutic interventions ae diverse for the treatment of anxiety disorders. Individuals with specific phobias benefit from systematic desensitization, which allows for the development of a hierarchy of an individual’s specific fears. These fears are faced one at a time, beginning with the least threatening, and progressing to the very most threatening. Those with obsessive-compulsive disorder may achieve benefit through cognitivebehavioral therapy. This therapeutic approach targets one’s maladaptive thoughts (obsessions) and problematic behaviors (compulsions). On a short-term basis, anxiolytic medication is often useful to reduce

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE : NOVEMBER/DECEMBER EDITION 2020

symptoms. However, there is a high potential to develop addiction with the use of this type of medication. The lowest possible dose should be prescribed, for the shortest amount of time. Maintaining regular physical activity has shown to be effective in lowering anxiety levels, too. The practice of meditation is effective for reducing anxiety. When we’re anxious, we develop a pattern of rapid, shallow breathing; practicing diaphragmatic breathing on a regular basis is helpful for lowering our overall anxiety level. Journaling our thoughts and feelings is yet another useful means of managing increased anxiety.

Order Your Copy NOW On Amazon

Network Rochester is the premier business networking, events and brand marketing group committed to delivering your message in a way no other medium can. With a database of over 65,000 local business professionals, we are able to create highly effective marketing campaigns to suit your business. Along with coordinating large expos & events, grand openings, networking events and more! We build relationships. We help you to make sales. Promote your services. Gather data. Network Rochester delivers powerful, creative, high performance campaigns. We utilize cutting edge media and technology, along with traditional marketing methods to achieve maximum results. We are your one-stop-shop for all your events, marketing and advertising needs.

SERVICES INCLUDE:

Event Planning and Coordination Business Networking Brand Design & Marketing Social Media Marketing

585.727.9120 I NETWORKROCQUEEN@GMAIL.COM