RWO July 2017 by Rochester Woman Online

howe caverns A RWO SECRET

cooking with F. OLIVERS

SUMMER festival fun

Jessica Lahr

wanting to have it Fun In The Sun ALL! with RWO Making Rochester “GLOW”

THIS REGION IS HOME TO LEADERS. This region is home to motivated people like Katie. Just weeks after Rochester Regional Health’s neurosurgeons removed a life-threatening tumor from her brain, she was back to coaching – leading her girls to victory.

Katie Titus, Webster

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Photo by: Stephen S. Reardon Photography

Get ready! Get your tail waggin! Go! Saturday, September 30th, 2017

You can make a difference. Join the march to help pets in need.

july

{ table of COntents }

30 regulars 6

PUBLISHERS LETTER

8 TEAM LIST 34 FOR A GOOD CAUSE

Operation Build-Up

WOMEN WHO INSPIRE Debbie Santillo

40 A WOMENS PERSPECTIVE

140

QUEEN OF ARTS Karlie Lanni

62 ON THE WAY UP

Cafe 1872

HER EDGE Dr. Cynthia McGill

72 LAW FORUM WITH BOB BRENNA 74

ITâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S A RW SECRET... A Visit to Howe Caverns

90 LAW AND HIP HOP

Road Rage Tour

PRICELESS VESSELS

116

MORTGAGE TIPS FOR WOMEN

118

MARY SELLS THE LAKES

120 TIPS FOR WOMEN

Hair Care by MOnat

Health & wellness 34

HEALTHY WOMAN

100 FUN IN THE SUN

104

114

SOUL SENSE

140

MIND, BODY & SPIRIT

148 LIVING ABOVE THE LINE 166 EVERYDAY PUSH 172

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

ROCHESTER HEALTHY SUPPLIMENTS

2017

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COVER STORY 12 JESSICA LAHR Wanting To Have It All! regulars 122 124

TUXEDO’S PET CORNER

128

HOME WITH GINI

130

YOU CAN BE...

ROCHESTER MINIMALISTS

134 FLOWER CITY BITTIES 136 UNRAVELED 138

YOUNG WOMENS COLLEGE PREP

special features

110 KANNAWAY 174

NO EXCUSES

fashion & BEAUTY 112

all about m.e.

food 48

PLATTER CHATTER Hogan’s Hideaway

COOKING WITH F. OLIVERS

104 ROCHESTER DRINKS 106

ROCHESTER WOMAN FOODIE

152

COOKING WITH JULIA K

150 ASK THE ANGELS 144 THE BEST YOU 154 FINANCIAL MATTERS 156

IN HER DEFENSE

160

WOMEN THAT RISE

164

BUILDING YOUR BUSINESS WITH BIQI

168

THINK OPPOSITE

176

SOCIAL MEDIA WITH TAMARA MACDUFF

178

CALENDAR OF EVENTS

special features 22

politics part 1

36 A MIRACLE FIELD FOR ROCHESTER 80 A RWO FESTIVAL TOUR

{ from the publisher }

“We travel not to escape life, but for life not to escape us.” - Anonymous

ur July edition of Rochester Woman Online features a truly beautiful woman inside and out...Mrs. Jessica Lahr. Being a wife, mother, business woman and model are just a few of the many hats she wear. She wants it all and wants you to have it all too! You can read about her amazing journey and see some of the amazing photos shot by Tellier Studios during an all day photo session touring the city of Rochester starting on page [12]. A very hot topic in Rochester right now is the local political races for City Council and the the race for Mayor. We had the pleasure of sitting down with one of the candidates, former police chief James Sheppard to get his take on, some of the behind the scenes issues and also the controversy surrounding this years elections. In PART 1 of this political series we dig deep into the topics you are most interested in, and see how the underdog might be able to just become the leader of the pack. Read the first part of this series on page [22]. Hogan’s Hideaway isn’t a new name for Rochester – it’s actually more of a landmark, really. The Park Ave restaurant first opened its doors in 1980, as a casual neighborhood eatery ‘hidden away’ behind a grocery store. Known for its from-scratch casual menu, convenient location and relaxed yet eclectic ambiance, the bistro became something of a mainstay in Rochester. Despite its veteran status, Hogan’s Hideaway closed its doors in the fall of 2016.

T T

ON OUR COVER

On our cover this month for our Travel & Leisure edition is former Mrs. New York America, Jessica Lahr. Photography by Tellier Studios with wardrobe by Panache Vintage & Finer Consignment and Trilogy with swimwear by Venus. Spray Tan by Glow Sunless Tanning.

Now, Hogan’s is back, and despite its familiar name, the eatery has undergone some massive changes – both inside and out. Read all about the new Hogan’s and check out the mouth watering photos by photographer Brandon Vick on page [48]. This month we decided to flip thngs around on photographer Karlie Lanni. Instead of being behind the camera taking amazing photos for our covers like she has done for over 2 years now, we decided to put her on the frontline to tell her story! Check her out as our Queen of Arts this month on page [42]. Be sure to flip through all the amazing pages this month with truly inspiring stories, new columns, travel desitinations, summer tips, and so much more...hope you have a fun and relaxing summer and don’t forget to take Rochester Woman Online with you wherever you go!

Kelly ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

{ a look at our team }

PUBLISHER EDITOR-IN CHIEF ASSOCIATE EDITOR CREATIVE DIRECTOR/GRAPHIC DESIGN PHOTOGRAPHY

CONTRIBUTING WRITERS

ADVERTISING SALES SOCIAL MEDIA DIRECTOR WEB DESIGN & MANAGEMENT

Kelly Breuer Cheryl Kates-Benman Cassondra Kubit Kelly Breuer Tellier Studios Sandy Arena Lush Light Photography Brandon Vick Christopher “GoodKnews” Cardwell Daniel Delucenay Julia Antenucci Cheryl Kates-Benman Jamie Betteridge Laurie Bonnell Amy Cavalier Alana Calhoon Ginni Denninger Penelope Pankow Alison Donaghey Mark Forrest Patrick Mary Therese Friel Carrie Gruschow Phyllis Haberer Paul Iatomasi Sarah Itkin Rebecca Jaffarian David Jenkins Sheila Kennedy Julia Khoury Candice Korts Cassondra Kubit Beth Lynch Tamara MacDuff Julie M. May Debbie McQ Maja Milicevic Klugh Stephanie Nitya Armstrong Mary Elizabeth Nesser Jason Pierce Kitty Teresi Lauren Harrison Robert L. Brenna, Jr. Kelly Breuer Cassondra Kubit Brandon DeWind

Rochester Woman ONLINE is the premier professional woman’s online publication in the greater Rochester area. Our feature articles address major topics that interest local women. Each issue includes articles on health, fashion, fitness, finance, dining, lifestyle and personal perspectives, as well as a spotlight on local area women. The electronic magazines are distributed freely through your favorite app store and will be in your inbox electronically by the first week of every month. The publication is available free of charge. Please feel free to contact publisher Kelly Breuer at 585.727.9120 or you can email us at networkrocqueen@gmail.com. Download our current media kit at www. rochesterwomanonline.com. The magazine is published 12 times a year by Rochester Woman ONLINE. Copyright © 2017 Rochester Woman ONLINE. No part of this magazine may be reproduced or republished without the consent of the publisher. Rochester Woman ONLINE is not responsible for unsolicited submissions, manuscripts, photos or artwork. All such submissions become the property of Rochester Woman ONLINE and will not be returned.

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ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

{ our cover story }

BY JULIE M. MAY I PHOTOS BY TELLIER PHOTOGRAPHY

JESSICA LAHR

WANTS TO HAVE IT ALL

And because she has such a sweet and giving heart, she wants you to have it all too. W i f e , m o t h e r, business woman, make-up artist and model are just a few of the hats she wears.

Jessica grew up in Prattsburgh, NY. From a very young age she’s had an interest all things beauty. In 2003 she graduated from Cosmetology School. Three years later she married her husband Chad. Together they are raising two boys, Colby, 9, and Max, 7. “We also have a naughty but adorable Olde English bulldog named Blue,” she said. She is also a former Mrs. New York 2015, a title she won right here in Henrietta, NY. Her first reaction when approached to enter the competition was “thanks but no thanks.” After careful consideration, she says “I decided it was an amazing chance for me to conquer my fears of public speaking and getting on stage in a bathing suit after a 70 lb weight loss, all while meeting remarkable women in our beautiful state and most importantly using it to stand up for a cause.” As a contestant, she chose to promote the Ronald McDonald House. When one of her sons was treated for a rare disease called Kawasaki disease at Strong Hospital, she and her husband were able to shower, sleep and wash clothes there. “We were so incredibly humbled and grateful that the Ronald McDonald

house allowed us to stay there without a financial burden so we could be mere minutes away from our little guy during that scary and heartbreaking time. The Ronald McDonald House relies solely on volunteers and fundraisers to continue what they do for families with sick or injured children and it was my mission to recruit volunteers and raise funds to pay it forward and give back.” She said she didn’t expect to win the pageant, and in fact had never even seen one before entering. Jessica says “I was absolutely shocked to be crowned that day.” She admits after winning the title, the hard work began. “I’m so glad I looked fear in the face, and decided to compete. It was life changing.” “I was able to work with people who are fighting the good fight every single day of their lives whether it be aid to veterans, support domestic violence victims, cancer research or support fundraisers, natural disaster fundraisers, makeovers to women who come from underprivileged communities, I could go on. “Talk about humbling, eye opening, and wow, just a blessing to be given a voice just by wearing a crown. Sounds

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“ Working towards what we think our purpose on earth is.... not just career but the lives we touch a long the way... the relationships we build... the reward of experiences we are able to have because of the hard work we’ve put in to earn them... all after pushing through the barriers, obstacles, fears, and challenges to attain our goals and dreams.” 14

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

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ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

{ our cover story }

Her beauty advice for all women is to smile. “Have confidence. Don’t have it? Work on it. Find something you love about yourself and hold onto that. Beauty comes from within. Be kind. Kindness is beauty.” silly as a grown woman but people do take notice,” she said. “The amount of support I had was overwhelming,” Jessica said. “I’m so grateful to all those who rallied to support the causes I stood for.” Jessica went on to compete at the national Mrs. America Pageant in Las Vegas, Nevada. “I didn’t leave nationals with the crown but I won the next best, or perhaps best award, thanks to my gorgeous fellow competitors, the Mrs. Congeniality award.” “The people I met that year, the people who supported me during that once in a lifetime experience truly left an imprint on my heart forever. I walked away a better me, inspired by the remarkable human beings this world has... every day heroes. There is a whole lot of good out there. I was blessed to witness it.” Jessica and her husband Chad both do commercial modeling in upstate New York and are either owners or co-owners of multiple businesses ranging from climate controlled storage to party photo booth rentals. 16

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

She says her first passion is truly being a freelance makeup artist. She does one on one consultation’s, helping clients feel “confident and beautiful.” “I have such an immense amount of love for and I enjoy being a makeup artist most. Being able to have the opportunity to help someone is truly a gift. I’m so grateful to be able to do what I love,” she says. She also has her own beauty and lifestyle YouTube channel, “where I focus on teaching women different ways to apply makeup, share product reviews, and tips and tricks to help women feel less overwhelmed when it comes to applying makeup or shopping for makeup.” “Creating this channel allows me to reach so many more people from all over who have questions like many of my clients.” Her beauty advice for all women is to smile. “Have confidence. Don’t have it? Work on it. Find something you love about yourself and hold onto that. Beauty comes from within. Be kind, Kindness is beauty. “As far as a beauty routine, wash off your makeup and moisturize every evening.

Mascara would be my one go to makeup product if I had one so find a mascara you like and use it!” With such a busy lifestyle, I asked her if she had a free day off how would she spend it? “I love the spa so spoiling myself at a spa and/or traveling and experiencing new and exciting places are my top two choices,” she says. When asked how she measures success, she quotes George Sheehan. “Success means having the courage, the determination, and the will to become the person you believe you were meant to be.” “ Working towards what we think our purpose on earth is.... not just career but the lives we touch a long the way... the relationships we build... the reward of experiences we are able to have because of the hard work we’ve put in to earn them... all after pushing through the barriers, obstacles, fears, and challenges to attain our goals and dream.” Asked what’s next on her plate, she replies “outside of being a mommy, wife, and

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

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ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

{ our cover story }

“ I d i d n’t l e a ve nationals with the crown but I won the next best, or perhaps best award, thanks to my gorgeous fellow competitors, the Mrs. Congeniality award.”

working the business as well as modeling, I hope to focus more on traveling with my makeup career and continue building my new YouTube channel. I hope to help women of all ages see makeup as an outlet for creative play, helping them feel beautiful, and perhaps just have somewhere to go and watch a 10 minute video each week while sipping on their beverage of choice just to take a break from the every day to-do list.” With all she has done and achieved, I had to ask what her proudest accomplishment is. She states, “sounds cliché but bringing two amazing little human beings into this world was and always will be my greatest accomplishment. They gave me purpose I didn’t know I had. They’ve taught me

that I’m stronger than I thought.” My boys “made me realize by following my dreams, I’m showing them, they too can one day follow theirs. They’ve shown me a love so powerful, so priceless, so unconditional, and for that I’m the luckiest woman in the world.” You can find Jessica at the YouTube URL: www.youtube.com/jessicaellebeautylifestyle or follow her on Instagram: @jessicaellebeauty. You can also contact her for a make-up consultation appointment on her website at www.jessicaellebeauty.com.

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

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{ SPECIAL FEATURE }

by CHERYL KATES-BENMAN, ESQ. I DANIEL DELUCENAY

Sometimes the Underdog Should Get the Bone: Rochester Politics

Familiar faces seem to be a way to characterize what the options are. Rochester Woman was lucky enough to get an inside view by talking to some city residents and some of the candidates. Chief James Sheppard focuses his agenda on what is right and the needs of the community. James Sheppard brings a true challenge to the incumbent Mayor Lovely Warren. Sheppard served his term as a legislator and now is seeking the mayor seat. A newcomer, Mary Lupien shall also throw her hat in the arena of the City Council race. The race is becoming extremely interesting as the mayoral race includes incumbent Mayor Lovely Warren, Legislator and former Police Chief; Chief James Sheppard and newswoman Rachael Barnhart. In the days leading up to the beginnings of the election, the buzz on the streets and in the press was inclusive of the race argument. In March, the issue of race popped up surrounding accusations about Adam McFadden and his alleged bullying and intimidating statements made surrounding the 25th Legislative District where people called for a public reprimand from Mayor Warren which never came.

The election shenanigans are well underway as we politics at its best, the main enter phase two of the Rochester characteristic seems to be a focus on “Black Matter”. If you are an African-American, process: the petitioning. Lives it is expected as an individual to cast a vote for American politicians with the expectation The two more interesting African the politicians who are African-Americans will represent African-American races are City Council automatically interests. The color of someone’s skin doesn’t mean a person will automatically support and the Mayoral race. any and all African-American issues. Don’t be

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

hoodwinked! Politics is not governed by the color of skin, historically and emphatically, it’s about sticking with your party-line and their agenda; whether you are black or white. Vote together and we shall overcome, and that’s it regardless of color. Recently, a community-based forum held by Transparency for Peace highlighted additional city issues. Community members were enraged by what they characterized as racist police dealings where community members were being abused by the police, the need for reform and a demand for accountability surrounding why known drug houses were not being shut down by the city. While no governmental process is perfect and it is easy to throw stones, some type of resolution must be found. The question is can a new administration tackle this agenda? Or will they just fall in with the run of the game of Rochester Politics on the day after the election is over? This is the question we as community members must ask. Mary Lupien, is also throwing her hat in the race for city council. Mary is a substitute teacher at the Rochester City School District. She serves as a volunteer organizer at “Mothers Out Front Rochester”. Mary is no stranger to community issues. Most of her background seems to stem from grass roots organizing. Interesting on her social media page, Mary quotes Frederick Douglas “We are one, our cause is one. We must work together if we are to succeed”. Rochester Woman asked Mary what her thoughts are about Rochester politics as she enters the race.

{ SPECIAL FEATURE }

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

{ SPECIAL FEATURE } “My duty as a police officer was to be disengaged from politics. I never spoke on my political views . I felt it was not my place. I had no position and I kept everything neutral. My job was to serve and protect public safety”.

“People in our city are struggling. Struggling to make ends meet, struggling to get where they need to go, struggling to make a better life for them and their families. With the state of our country on a national level, things will only get harder. Now I am convinced more than ever we need change at the local level to enact policies that affect systematic change to bring more equity and justice to Rochester. And this change has to come from the people living within the system and not those benefitting from the current system”. What happens after the election is over? Business as usual or reform? Allegiances amongst the incumbents’ ring true when hitting the campaign trail. Who do you align with? Which team? After the election, does everything go back to normal? These are all questions a candidate must ask, answer and decide.

FORMER POLICE CHIEF JAMES SHEPPARD: MAYORAL CANDIDATE

Rochester Woman was given an exclusive sit down with the mayoral candidate and we asked the tough questions. Every candidate has areas where people want to know “what really happened?” Seldom is there a chance to get the answers. Often the answers provide deep insight into why something was done a certain way and often those answers are not provided to the public but the adverse situation is used to throw political mud as to why you should not vote for someone. 24

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

One of the controversial issues which come up regarding mayoral candidate Chief James Sheppard is whether some of his decisions were questionable while serving the community. A local resident Amen Imhotep Ptah was clear, he would stick with Lovely. “What happens in our backyard will directly impact the citizens of Rochester, therefore, our local election season is of vital importance when it comes to the political and economic landscape in the city. Unfortunately, there are candidates in the mayoral race that can strategically divide the black vote, an essential element in deciding who gets elected. I truly don’t have confidence in James Sheppard especially the way he made excuses for the police misconduct while he was the Chief of Police. And although Mayor Lovely Warren has her mis-steps while being in office (her initial stance

on certain issues such as the pickaninny down at Charlotte Beach) I think she is the most qualified out of all the candidates. Rachael Barnhart does not have the community’s best interest in mind reflecting on her biased views and the use of a platform ( as a journalist, she is supposed to be objective) to attack members of political parties playing an implicit (and explicit) role in producing micro-aggressions and institutionalized racism in local media. Also we must pay attention to the school board candidates, as well as those running for sheriff and City Council. We all should find our voice in this process and make our votes count to get these people in office that will fight for the have-nots and equity all across the all institutional arenas in our community”. The police chief faced several difficult situations while he served the community. His tenure was during the beginning of race issues beginning to occur between the police and the community and the “Black Lives Matter” movement. Despite what we as normal people think there is no room for someone’s personal point of view when they are serving the public in a leadership capacity. Do all leaders uphold this integrity? Of course not. James Sheppard was one that did. The choice to remain apolitical, including not voting was recently questioned. Instead of seeing it for what it was an act of integrity it was turned into a blemish of why people should not vote for “ Shep”. When asked about these issues James replied:“I never lied. I never beat anyone. I never took any money from anyone. I faced the music honorably. I

{{ special SPECIAL feature FEATURE }} “It’s not about me vs. Lovely. The political campaign process is a three-legged stool. It is the same way for the past thirty years. All campaigns run with three issues; education, public safety and economics. At the end of the day nothing changes.”

I learned early on in my career, people want to be heard. When issues present when there are emotions and anger involved there is usually a tense situation a hand. I tried to let people say what they have to say and if you listen you often get further. If I can do something to help I do. Sometimes there’s nothing you can do other than listen. My duty as a police officer was to be disengaged from politics. I never spoke on my political views . I felt it was not my place. I had no position and I kept everything neutral. My job was to serve and protect public safety”. James indicated he took the position when he served the public by having no alignment. This included removing himself from the political process all together. He did not exercise his right to vote during those years and he stands by his decision. People who entered the political realm here in Rochester started as civil rights activists. If you follow what happened after election their voice was silenced. Most people all think when entering politics, I am going to make a difference. When an individual gets there they soon find out what is expected and what happens if that politician decides to “be the rebel”. As a public official, there are interests which come into play. Integrity vs. remaining in office is often the choice which must be made. With the use of technology certain issues are brought to the public eye with the posting of videos on social media. This is what brought the issue of community police issues to the forefront. Private videos. Does a camera lie? Of course it shows what happened but there is also an issue of selective viewing. When only portions of what happened are filmed often the justification of a certain action is eliminated. Seeing only part of the story often leads people down a road of decision-making which is flawed based on the portion of events shared. In a police officer’s point of view often what transpired leading up to an incident is what justified a certain action. These days upholding the law is not an easy job. Tempers are flaring justifiably when we have multiple people dying at the hands of the police and it appears race is playing into 26

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

the decision to use force. Black Lives Matter. This stemmed public outrage across the nation and induced public protest in cities across the world including Rochester. We as a city, faced our own issues regarding the movement and a protest was scheduled during prime hours of the East End nightlife. Chief Sheppard was not the chief during this movement but he pointed out things we may not as citizens think about. Often during protests we see looting. There is unrest. Local businesses are affected during the times of the protest. In Rochester, there are a group of clubs all in one area which were right in the middle of the protest that evening. Patrons feared utilizing the businesses as they would have to cross through the protests to get into any club in that area. First amendment rights allow for peaceful protests. These issues must be balanced when making policing decisions. Often when there are protests, the aim of the organizers is to be arrested to seek public outcry. When this is the issue police must balance the rights of the protesters and their duty to keep the peace. Chief Sheppard faced this issue head on when we also as a community faced the Occupy Movement. Administrators know the history of certain groups and many times the groups uphold the movements despite the issues. History plays into what decisions need to be made. Rochester did experience violent riots in the early seventies as part of a movement and a similar protest led to police cars being overturned on Main Street. Once destruction is used, the right to protest is cancelled and the need to maintain order and peace kicks in. The police are forced to step in with violent offenders of the peace and make arrests as peacefully as they are able. Once protestors respond to officers with the use of violence this muddies the issues as officers must maintain peace and public order. Chief Sheppard received a lot of criticism on the way he handled the Occupy Movement. When asked about this issue he responded honestly and did not run from the question of “What really happened?” Chief Sheppard indicated he first reviewed history of what happened in 2010, when some of the same political action

groups were involved in a prior protest which ended in unfavorable situations. Many of the other protest were ending with violence to “Take back the streets”. Chief Sheppard did not want that here. “ I was proud, Rochester was one of the only cities the protests did not turn violent”. The city engaged in negotiations with the protest organizers and an end date was agreed upon. This date passed and it was time to end the situation. There was no question if an individual remained in the area after the date, arrest was the consequence. Shep was faced with the decision of “ how are the police going to clear the park?” He made a difficult decision. He went with his gut instinct and the goal was to end the situation peacefully. His choice was to handle it personally or to send a group of officers to arrest people. He decided it do it personally. This decision was not to show everyone he was boss or out of arrogance, but to ensure the rights of the protesters were respected. By making all of the arrests himself, he knew first-hand how it was handled…by the book. Chef Sheppard indicates his mother played a role in how he views the world. He came from a family of 12 children. His mother struggled to support the family but always instilled the value system it was about working hard, giving back and helping people. James’ mother lived by example. She worked hard, took care of the family and thought about herself last. She went back to school earning her GED at age 42. She continued to receive an Associates in Nursing at age 43 and her RN Bachelors at 53. James reflects: “The nation forgot what policing was intended for; helping people not oppressing minorities. During my career in law enforcement for 32 years, I saw far too many dead bodies. The police handled disputes by documenting things and then after someone was shot, they knew who to pick up for questioning. Our job was not intended to write things down. As chief, I began to make a change a shift to preventative policing. I tried to address the city problem of violence

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by identifying problems and providing solutions. Offering services to known potential offenders instead of just waiting for a violent crime to happen and arresting people. People are innocent until proven guilty and police cannot act simply because of an affiliation, there must be justification. Providing opportunities can stop one crime from happening. That makes this approach worth it”. An interesting metaphor was compared; the starfish on the beach. Every day a man walked upon the beach. That same man despite there being hundreds of starfish washed up on the beach picked up a single starfish and threw it back into the water. Another characteristic of local politics is anyone can run for office. Senator Rich Funke, began his career as a newscaster. Assemblyman Koon ran for office after his daughter was murdered in the community. Rachael Barnhart, a mayoral candidate was also a newscaster. Shawn Dunwoody, a local artist also joined the race for City Council. Former Chief Duffy and James Sheppard served as career law enforcement officers. The message is clear in Rochester a politician does not have to be a career-politician. Anyone can make it into office.

An interesting thread surfaced when reviewing local politics, at least three candidates indicate they were told to “wait your turn”. At least one of those people was successful when they decided they weren’t going to wait their turn. Chief Sheppard makes it clear: “It’s not about me vs. Lovely. The political campaign process is a three-legged stool. It is the same way for the past thirty years. All campaigns run with three issues; education, public safety and economics. At the end of the day nothing changes. The data for the last three years shows things are worse. Poverty is increasing. The stats regarding reading and math levels for children are terrible. I want to make a difference and in order to do this, we must change our focus on how we do things. We must become self-sufficient. We must create a culture for education. We can’t just focus on downtown when developing the city. What we are doing is creating new development but pushing the people out of the area into the poverty-stricken zones because the people who lived there can no longer afford the new housing. This is not a solution, it’s masking the problem.

When I retired I didn’t have a plan. I started working with the Center for Youth and then went to Carnegie. It wasn’t my first idea to run for office. Someone else suggested it. It was pointed out I had name recognition. Paul Haney was retiring because he reached the term limit. The only thing which was important to me was I could reach back into the community and continue to give back. There seemed to be so many people with an outlet in media but they were doing nothing to make changes”. This week the politics of Rochester really kicks off as we enter the petitioning portion of the elective process. Statements were issued by the candidates and the fiscal budget was unveiled. Chief Sheppard weighs in stating “ Let’s not play politics with our future”. The Democrat and Chronicle indicated in an article going as far to claim the proposed budget was nothing more than an “election year budget”. Team Sheppard outlines this budget proposal uses “long-term budgeting for short-term needs”. With the current state of affairs in our city and nation-wide, its questionable whether any candidates can make a difference. Every election brings some new but they must mix with old. Can anyone make change? Let’s hope so! ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

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{ women who inspire }

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

{ WOmen who inspire }

BY CHERYL KATES-BENMAN, ESQ. I PHOTOS BY SANDY ARENA

Debbie Santillo From the Frying Pan to the Stage

Ever met that one person who’s smile lit up the room? Or that they were so multitalented each thing they present with leaves everyone amazed with delight? Or the creativity they share with the world just seems to make this otherwise cruel place a better place to be? Rochester Woman Online is proud to introduce a new writer who has all of those qualities. Meet Debbie Santillo.

RWO first met Debbie, through the Mary Therese Friel Modeling Agency. Despite her short stature, Debbie was determined to break into the world of glamour and beauty, every little girl’s dream to be a model. Back when we were growing up, the reality was if you weren’t 5’10 and 120 pounds modeling would never be a career for you. Now the door is opened for everyone and there is actually a slew of modeling jobs for the non-traditional model. Society is changing. The entire world is opening for everybody. If you have a dream pursue it! After getting her feet wet, completing Mary Therese’s modeling school and starting to do some runway shows Debbie is gaining her footing. She learned there is no feeling like walking down the runway when all eyes are on you. Debbie thinks “No matter what, if you have an interest, jump in and try it, if it fits, work on it, until you own it”. Debbie remembers how she developed her love for gardening. She is an avid gardener and each year she delights in making her home a beautiful place. She loves to take photos of her beautifully grown flowers, vegetables, and herbs. She grows a full vegetable garden each season. She has vivid memories in childhood how everyone used to grow a garden. In fact, she and her girlfriends formed an Apples, Berries and Chives (ABC club). She would remark how delightful it was when the neighbor’s raspberry bush would

creep over through the fence sharing its fruits of labor so she could eat one. She even used those berries to make pies in her Suzy Homemaker Oven. Or the neighbor who gave everyone some zucchini and tomatoes when they picked their harvest. When she grew up and bought her own home Debbie learned how much she missed that. Debbie’s first article with us shares with you how she loves to make the combination garden where she plants her vegetables amongst her flowers. Her gardens are amazing. Debbie considers her gardens her art-work. Debbie also has a love for acting and dancing. She is a song writer. Debbie was involved for 16 years in Christmas productions at her church where she acted, danced , choreographed and sang solos. She also wrote and directed skits and helped to create stage backgrounds and props. She still sings in the Praise Choir every other Sunday. She recently joined up with Cynthia Andresen and is participating in Cynthia’s latest project; featuring a work in progress; “GI Jane’s guest-artist dancing on The Enneagram, in the Battlefield of Being” at Nazareth College, July 29th at 7:00 pm . Recently, you could catch her at a fundraiser where she was portraying a famous historical figure. The Executive Director of the Warner School, which is part of the U of R, hired Debbie to stroll during cocktail ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

solos. She also wrote and directed skits and helped to create stage backgrounds and props. She still sings in the Praise Choir every other Sunday. She recently joined up with Cynthia Andresen and is participating in Cynthia’s latest project; featuring a work in progress; “GI Jane’s guest-artist dancing on The Enneagram, in the Battlefield of Being” at Nazareth College, July 29th at 7:00 pm . Recently, you could catch her at a fundraiser where she was portraying a famous historical figure. The Executive Director of the Warner School, which is part of the U of R, hired Debbie to stroll during cocktail hour at the Harro East Ballroom to portray this amazing woman, Lillian Wald from history. Lillian once lived in Rochester and today is laid to rest at Mt. Hope Cemetery. Debbie’s role in this event called “Rochester’s Renowned” was to educate others of Lillian Wald’s many accomplishments. Lillian was an activist and helped in many areas of life including women, children, tenants and African-American rights. She was a nurse who started Visiting Nurse Services, having 32

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

nurse’s in public schools and assisted in pushing for child labor laws etc.

created corporate gift baskets and much, much more.

Debbie loves to volunteer and often assists Mary Therese Friel with charity events the agency supports. Lollypop Farm, where Mary Therese participates in the pet-assisted-therapy programs with her animals helping others is often a place they volunteer. Debbie feels giving back is a satisfying way to make a contribution to the world. Helping people is always something that leaves you with a good feeling inside.

Early on, she worked at Bagel Land of Irondequoit, Le Champigion French Restaurant in Webster and the Country House Restaurant in Penfield. She also spent a winter season at the Shallows Restaurant in Fort Meyers, Florida and served as the house chef for the priests at St. John Fisher College’s private mansion. In 1991, she started her own private catering business with a dba of Create a Party with/Debora Santillo. Also, Debbie volunteered at her church and shared her creative talents with friends and family cooking for many functions (for over 20 years), including the largest Candidate’s Night Reception in NYS! This event was an evening where political candidates were discussing their platforms (mostly Republicans).

That’s not all! Debbie lives an interesting life where she spent her career as a chef, a culinary expert delighting the palate of some amazing people in different parts of the country. She has memories of how she first met her husband. His parents owned a small restaurant: The Clam Shack in Irondequoit Seabreeze area. Debbie was the head chef, during lunch hours at Edward’s Restaurant in Downtown Rochester. She also ran the gourmet food take out store where she created her own recipes and started catering through the store. She

Rochester Woman is proud to introduce Debbie as our latest new writer. We hope that you enjoy what she shares with you about her experiences as much as we do. Debbie Santillo is a woman who inspires.

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{ healthy WOMan }

BODY TREATMENTS!

Why Should You Get One Today? by cassondra kubit

When we hear the word “Spa” we think about relaxation and pampering. Which is of course why many places use the word spa in their business name. The world of pampering and beauty is a multi-billion-dollar industry. There are new “spas” opening every day. There are franchised “spas” and locally owned “spas”. When you walk into a spa you expect to see a multitude of massage services, facials and body treatments of every kind known to man. We have seen a shift over the years in the health and wellness field. People have been asking for a better way of life. They are looking for an alternative way of living and an alternative for prescription medications. The massage world has shifted from pampering to medical based treatments. If your back or neck hurts your first thought may not be going to the doctors but instead going to see your massage therapist. Many “spa” treatments can be considered an alternative to taking certain prescription medications nowadays. Estheticians have been put into the category of “pamper me” or “relax me” for as long as I can remember, even though estheticians work with the largest organ in our bodies, the skin. They are taxed with hydrating, exfoliating, clearing up blemishes, toning and tightening of the skin. This is our first defense against the elements and we tend to forget to take care of it. We may decide we need a facial for a special event or the big day to bring some shine and sparkle to the skin, but we should be doing this daily. For those who do facials once a month for your face, and massages once a month for your muscles, what about taking care 34

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

of the rest of the skin on the body? Our hands and feet take a beating every day. You might say you get manicures and pedicures every now and then that help. Or that you moisturize every day. What about the skin in the hard the reach places, or the areas that we sweat the most like our backs, chests and thighs? What can we do about these areas? When you decide to get on the skincare treatment train you come to a conundrum because you

have no idea what you should be looking for or what kind of treatments are right for you. Estheticians can help with all your skincare needs with facial treatments to full body treatments and wraps. They can also help put you on a good skin regime by recommending what products you should be using at home and what kind of services you should be getting at least once a month for that deep clean. It’s like going to the dentist for a cleaning, but more enjoyable. There are a ton of different kinds of skincare treatments that are confusing even to someone who tends to get frequent facials. Most people start off with what is called a Signature Facial because it is the most basic and usually the most cost effective. The Signature Facial is meant to be an introductory to the skincare world. It is for every kind of skin type and starts off with a basic cleanser, basic mask, and a basic moisturizer. They usually last for an hour with some light massage work on the face, chest, arms and hands. The Signature Facial is where your Esthetician should be explaining to you about your skin and what kind of facial treatments would be good for your skin, if a mask or peel would be beneficial, and what kind of body treatments would benefit for the overall health of your skin. It should be an educational and enjoyable experience. This is also the time when you talk to your Esthetician about your concerns, this will give them some insight on which direction would be best. Body treatments come in all shapes and sizes...not really but there are many different types of wraps and treatments. You have the seaweed wrap, the mud wraps, the herbal wraps, sugar/salt scrubs, you have body polishes

and masks. There are treatments that help hydrate the skin, detoxify the skin and body, helps with toning and tightening the skin, and others that help heal and regenerate the skin. There are specific types of treatments for sensitive skin, dry skin, oily skin, acne skin, sun damaged and even aging skin. The world of skincare is a tricky road to maneuver but with a good Esthetician you shouldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t get lost. Other than not knowing what kind of treatment one should get there is the concern of the unknown. What should you expect? What should you wear? What do you end up wearing? Do I even wear anything? These are all very good questions and could keep many from even trying a facial or body treatment. The answer is you wear what you are comfortable wearing. You take off what you are comfortable taking off. To get the full benefits and to keep your clothing clean the less you wear the better. You

will be covered always accept for the body part that is being worked on at that time. You will always be respected and treated professionally. When you walk into an Estheticians room you may be presented with a robe and you may not be presented with a robe. At a higher end spa, a robe is pretty much a given. At the smaller more independent spas, a robe is not a given unless you are expected to switch rooms for other services. Robes are costly to purchase and to wash. You may or may not be presented with disposable underwear and bra depending on the service given. You will always have some type of cover to stay modest and to keep you from being exposed. There will be sheets and blanks on the table. There may even be a silver sheet of mylar that will trap the heat in so you do not get cold during the treatment process. Depending on the service that you are having

you may or may not get a steam machine in the room. They are used to help open the pores for a better cleanse and a deeper penetration of the products being used. The Esthetician may use their hands, dry brushes or dry brush gloves, and sometimes even a paintbrush. When the product is being removed at most places they will use hot towels, some places may have a table shower, or they may even have a standup shower where you can have a full shower and wash your hair and body. No matter which way the process is done you will still get the same results. Body treatments and facials are of course very relaxing but the health benefits are hard to not look at. If you are having oily skin that is causing acne, or have rosacea, or skin that is super dry there are things that can be done. Check out your local Estheticianâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s and have a chat about proper skincare today. Our skin is our first line of defense against a disease. ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

O { for a good cause } by amanda sparrin

A MIRACLE FIELD FOR ROCHESTER

A TRUE MIRACLE!

It is easy to see Nico Santiago’s strength when he’s hitting baseballs with his dad. It is with this strength that he battles neuromuscular disease.

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

Nico, from Irondequoit, was born with congenital myasthenia gravis, a rare chronic neuromuscular disease that causes weakness throughout his whole body. He was sick when he was very young, dealing with frequent respiratory infections and multiple hospitalizations. His parents, Fina and Israel, thought they going to lose him several times.

Nico has spent many weeks in the Golisano Children’s Hospital at Strong Pediatric Intensive Care Unit fighting off viruses that wouldn’t cause much more than a cough in most kids. Thankfully, over the years, Nico grew stronger. He began playing Challenger baseball at the age of five.

Little League Baseball established the Challenger Division in 1989 as a separate division to enable children and adults of all ages with physical and mental challenges to enjoy the game of baseball. Similarly, in 1999, the Miracle League was officially formed to offer children with disabilities the opportunity to play America’s favorite pastime. The first Miracle Field opened in 2000 in Rockdale County, Georgia. A miracle field is a field that has been specifically designed for individuals with physical and or cognitive challenges. It is made with a rubberized surface that it is fully wheelchair accessible. Bases and pitching mounds are painted onto the surface so that there are no raised obstacles that you would find on a typical baseball field. The dugouts are enlarged to accommodate wheelchairs and other apparatus. According to the National Program Director for Miracle League, there are approximately 150 rubber fields in the US.

Today, more than 30,000 children participate in more than 900 Challenger Divisions and 200,000 children play in 270 Miracle Leagues across the United States as well as in Australia, Canada, and Puerto Rico. Here at home, there are 400 youth playing Challenger baseball in nine leagues throughout the Greater Rochester region. These kids, who have a variety of disabilities, are given the lowest priority for field availability…and when they are able to play, they play on traditional fields with raised surfaces, including dirt or grass that can be safety hazards for wheelchair-bound or visually impaired players, and have to safely navigate uneven terrain. Enter Ron Kampff. While Ron has been active in a variety of volunteer capacities over the years, his passion is around serving the needs of children and young adults with physical disabilities and improving their lives through sport. Ron, who volunteered as a coach when his sons began playing t-ball, is a longtime member of the board of Webster Athletic Association. He was manager of two New York District 4 Championship Little League teams, and his love for the sport inspired him to bring Challenger Baseball to Webster in 2001. Today, he coaches both the Webster Challenger and Rochester Blind Athletes’ BEEP Baseball teams. “I have learned so much from these incredible kids and young adults,” says Kampff. “No matter their disability, their spirit, sense of humor, love for others and desire to belong have been a source of inspiration. Just a few

{ for a good cause }

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

{ for a good cause }

hours spent playing ball - hours away from physical therapy, hours as part of a team, hours getting exercise and enjoying the outdoors – and the chance to be like everybody else makes a world of difference.” In 2015, Ron, along with a dedicated group of volunteers, formed a non-profit organization, Challenger Miracle Field of Greater Rochester, to raise funds to build a Miracle Field and The Play with Possibilities playground, an inclusive and multisensory playground. Adjacent to the field will be a pavilion, ADA-compliant restrooms, and a concession stand. The complex is centrally located in the northeast part of Monroe County at the Ridge Park Athletic Complex at 1000 Ridge Road in Webster, adjacent to Webster Town Hall, and less than one mile from New York State Route 104. The facility is accessible via public transportation and para-transit lines. The entire project will cost approximately $2 million. “There really isn’t an alternative to Challenger,” says Nico’s mom, Fina. “Kids with physical disabilities really cannot be part of school activities, especially if they use a wheelchair or walker. But even with Challenger, not having the right type of field to be able to maneuver 38

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

over grass or rocks can be very difficult. That’s why the new Miracle Field is so important - these kids can move everywhere – the sky’s the limit!” Amanda Sparrin agrees. Sparrin’s son Bryson, or “B” as he was affectionately known, was born at 27 weeks old weighing just 2 pounds 10 ounces. Bryson had a stroke at birth and was later diagnosed with spastic quadriplegic cerebral palsy. Despite countless obstacles, Bryson was a fighter. Bryson was able to play three seasons of Challenger Baseball before his death at the age of seven in 2013. “When I think about Bryson’s life, I know without a doubt some of his happiest moments were being part of a real baseball team,” Sparrin says. “It was a chance to cheer, to run, to laugh and just forget about doctor’s visits and hospitals for a few hours.” In April of 2017, the organization reached a milestone – the $1 million mark in fundraising. “The outpouring of support from the community has been incredible,” says Kampff. The organization hosted its first gala this past April, raising nearly $100,000 and will hold its third annual Run, Walk and Roll 5k in October. Among the many major funders are the Daisy Marquis Jones Foundation, the Davenport-Hatch Foundation, ESL Charitable

Foundation, the Golisano Foundation, the Greater Rochester Health Foundation, the Karpus Family Foundation, Lions International, Monroe Wheelchair, and Wegmans. Construction on the field began last fall and it is scheduled to open on August 26th. A community celebration is planned, and festivities will be free. The group hopes to raise enough funds to begin construction of the amenities and playground in 2018. Today, Nico, at age 17, is a senior at Eastridge High School. His long-term prognosis is positive with mobility remaining his most significant obstacle. In addition to Challenger baseball, Nico also plays for the Rochester Rookies, a Junior Wheelchair and Ambulatory Sports program. He can’t wait for construction of the new Miracle Field to be completed. “I am really looking forward to seeing this field unify people together. It is not just for people in wheelchairs, it’s for people who can also walk. I can tell my friends, ‘Hey let’s go out and play some baseball.’ I can do that with this field,” said Nico. For more information or to make a donation, visit www.rochestermiraclefield.org.

Our Mission: Providing people with developmental, physical or intellectual disabilities a barrier-free, safe, accessible place to experience the health benefits and joy of play through baseball, other team sports, and adaptive recreational equipment.

No Boundaries, Only Possibilities.

Serving children and adults from throughout Monroe County.

To learn more or make a donation, visit

www.RochesterMiracleField.org

Decorative Bench

The only fully accessible outdoor playing field and boundless playground in our community.

W { a woman’s perspective }

by MAJA KLUGH I PHOTO BY BRANDON VICK PHOTOGRAPHY

The date of the beginning of summer varies according to climate, tradition and culture. When it is summer in the Northern Hemisphere, it is winter in the Southern Hemisphere, and vice versa.

A WOMAN’S PERSPECTIVE ON SUMMER ANDTRAVEL

Reckoning by cultural festivals, the summer season in the United States is commonly regarded as beginning on Memorial Day weekend (the last weekend in May) and ending on Labor Day weekend (the first weekend in September), more closely in line with the meteorological definition for the parts of the country that have four-season weather. The similar Canadian tradition starts summer on Victoria Day one week prior (although summer conditions vary widely across Canada’s expansive territory) and ends, as in the United States, on Labor Day. People take advantage of the warmer temperatures by spending more time outdoors during the summer. Activities such as traveling to the beach and picnics occur during summer months. Summer is here which means barbecues, long days at the beach, a party every weekend and, hopefully, a break from all the chaos. Sounds like a blast, right? Maybe not. Just because it’s summer doesn’t mean you need to run yourself ragged with your plans. Yes, a vacation is necessary, but it’s the planning part that can get you down. Many people stress themselves out with travel plans, expenses and the delays and traffic that come with it all. Not to mention cramming in all of your work before you head out.

One in six women start calorie counting once Christmas is over, and 10 per cent cut down on fatty foods once Easter is out of the way, according to a study. The summer holiday may be the time woman look forward to the most, but it seems it’s also the biggest cause of stress.

Summer is the hottest of the four temperate One in 20 women said they start dieting as as they return home from a previous seasons, falling between soon summer holiday, with 25 per cent saying their motivation is wanting to look good in spring and autumn. At main holiday photos. men, their main reason for getting in shape the summer solstice, the For for a trip abroad was to attract a new partner days are longest and the while away. A quarter of women said they worried about to pack, while the same proportion of nights are shortest, with what men are worried about what the weather will day-length decreasing bring while they are away. We need to slow down and say no to stress!!!!!!! as the season progresses Most of us feel the need to say yes to every invitation that comes our way, and crossing off as many to-dos from our list becomes the after the solstice.

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

priority during summer. Some words of advice: Don’t make the goal to pack in as much as you possibly can during the summer. Summer actually gives us a chance to relax and take a breather. Take advantage by slowing down and learning to say no. Schedule some down time so you aren’t going 100 miles per hour at all times. Choose which activities you want to attend and be sure to take some time every week to relax. Go for a long walk, have a date night or take the kids for some ice cream. No need to be all things to all people. We need to make sure to have a stay-cation to de-stress!!!!!!! Are you stressed out about spending too much money this summer on a vacation? Why not save a few bucks by taking advantage of what your local area has to offer? More and more people are realizing that a stay-cation can be just as fun and beneficial as going away. Besides, planning a vacation can add more stress and work to your already busy schedule. Sometimes you just need a break from the daily grind. Take a few days off to explore your town and its surroundings -- try a new restaurant, go for a hike, see a movie or just put your feet up and read a good book. Ladies, we need to self-care to stress less!!!!!! Try adding some healing rituals to your weekly routine to help you relax and de-stress. Take a warm bath, get that massage and pedicure you’ve been putting off, take a nap without feeling guilty or find a yoga or Pilate’s class to try out. Do whatever your heart desires! Most of us place our needs at the bottom of our priority list, but the truth of the matter is, if you don’t take care of yourself, who will? Choosing self-care is a wise decision, otherwise, you might get caught up in the busyness of the summer, which could leave you feeling burnt out by the sunny season’s end. Instead, let it be a time to relax and recharge. The most important of all: Social media has a sneaky way of making us feel inadequate — even if we have absolutely no reason to. And of course, it’s easy to make your life look perfect on Facebook and Instagram, but these carefully selected and perfectly filtered images never tell the full truth about someone’s experience. Instead of letting vacation envy get the best of you and trying to keep up with how much fun it looks like all your friends are having, remember that this summer is your own. Focus your energy on relaxing and having new experiences — and the fun part will take care of itself.

{ a womanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s perspective }

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

“Stand out... Be yourself...do what you LOVE!”

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

{ women who inspire }

{ QUEEN OF ARTS }

BY REBECCA JAFFARIAN I PHOTOS BY LUSH LIGHT PHOTOGRAPHY

KARLIE LANNI... “Stand out...be yourself... do what you LOVE!”

Ever since her uncle handed her a camera at the age of 12, Karlie Lanni has been passionate about photography. After high school she went on to hone her passion and craft at

Located in Rochester’s Neighborhood of the Arts, a vibrant neighborhood alive and full of artists and local businesses, Lush Light Photography has been capturing unique portraits and compelling images since 2005. The modern portrait and commercial photography studio specializes in beautiful portraits with a creative twist. What exactly is the Karlie Lanni creative twist? Karlie shared her photographic style comes from her heart and soul. It is all about intuition and connection. Her ideas are pretty wild, colorful and vibrant. When she was younger she originally wanted to paint or draw, she was impatient and needed to get her ideas out. She discovered that the camera was the perfect tool to do that. This dynamic firehouse of an artist described growing up as the weird middle child of 4 to entrepreneurs who did not want to fit into any certain mold. They wanted to make that mold, break it and try it again, fail succeed, try again and again. With that type of lifestyle the family moved frequently, with a different school every few years. Karlie didn’t mind all the changes. She decided at a very young age she too was built that way, to follow her own path and do her own thing. Rochester Woman Online was curious to know when Karlie first realized that creating was something she absolutely had to do?

The first time my mom put on records, listening to Blondie, David Bowie, it was like yep those are my people. I asked my mom if I could bleach my hair white blonde like her and Blondie when I was 6. She knew it was over then—blue hair at 16, back to blonde, red, purple, white and red. Then I discovered pin up models; Bettie Paige, Josephine Baker, Lily St. Claire— Hollywood Glamour, but the sexier, more bold side. That was confirmation that she could be weird, different, unique, a lovable outcast. It transformed her from a shy girl into a forever work in progress confident strong woman. Who or what are your biggest inspirations for your career and life? My family, especially my husband, we met in Seattle, and sold everything in 2001 to move back to be with family and build a life. Moving back was a humbling experience, RIT degree and I was working as a barista. Don’t get me wrong I loved it and met amazing people and believed I needed that kick in the ass of reality on how hard it is to make a living doing what you love, it does NOT just happen. My husband has been my biggest supporter, he knew it was killing me not to create, he encouraged me to get back into the swing of things. We do everything together, write music, performed in our band together (tranquilatwist). He is my right hand man always there to help me get to that

Don’t get me wrong I loved it and met amazing people and believed I needed that kick in the ass of reality on how hard it is to make a living doing what you love, it does NOT just happen. My husband has been my biggest supporter, he knew it was killing me not to create, he encouraged me to get back into the swing of things. We do everything together, write music, performed in our band together (tranquilatwist). He is my right hand man always there to help me get to that next level, whether it’s at my studio hanging prints, helping build sets, or helping me with the business side of things. Next up my creative “tribe” of friends and co workers. I met Elizabeth Mason of House Twelve Media 4 years ago. Our collaborations and friendship has been a real game changer. We just clicked creatively, pushed boundaries , ideas, challenged one another, I really thank her for a lot of what I have accomplished. Oh I am not done, this is really the most important thing to me, those who lift you up help you, want you to succeed….the backbone of my business. I really owe

to the talented team of hair and makeup artists I work with. I met make up artist Elizabeth Rhodes when we were both at a crossroad in our career. She was a social worker, that risked it all to do makeup artistry. I am so thankful for her friendship and what we have accomplished together, pushing one another to do what we are meant to do. Other amazing artists include, April Sunshine she just beams sunshine and makes my customers happy and beautiful. Make up artist Jess Kohlmeier her skills are phenomenal not to mention a stunning beauty in and out. Hair stylists Carly Kostiw and Jen Marks, the things they can do are just amazing! Lastly and without them I would not be able to do this, MY CLIENTS, they come to me and trust that I will bring to life the vision they have in mind, or they come to me baring it all (literally ha ha boudoir) I get to know them, that is a gift that I do and will not ever take for granted and hold a high responsibility and take very seriously delivering the most meaningful images I can.

What does Karlie Lanni want viewers to take away from her work? I really want to be like “damn, I want to do ashoot like that. I like to uplift people, make them see in them, beauty in and out. What’s integral to the work of a photographer? Be true to yourself, absolutely by no means try to be someone else, that is when you will get lost in the crowd, and that sea is big. Hold tight to your passion, drive and unique talents and vision. There is no one like you, remember that. The best advice she received in college her last quarter at RIT. One of her professors told her that she would never make it and she was pigeon holding herself with her work. She received her BFA in Advertising Photography at the time, and the professor was adamant that Karlie’s work would not fit in the real working world. She refused to change her style. Today she is happy that she stuck to it and was true to herself. “Stand out be yourself, do what you LOVE!”.

{ platter Chatter }

By Julia Antenucci | Photos by Brandon Vick PHOTOGRAPHY

hogans hideaway H o g an ’ s B rin g s Farm-toTable to Fast Casual

Hogan’s Hideaway isn’t a new name for Rochester – it’s actually more of a landmark, really. The Park Ave restaurant first opened its doors in 1980, as a casual neighborhood eatery ‘hidden away’ behind a grocery store. Known for its fromscratch casual menu, convenient location and relaxed yet eclectic ambiance, the bistro became something of a mainstay in Rochester. Despite its veteran status, Hogan’s Hideaway closed its doors in the fall of 2016. Now, Hogan’s is back, and despite its familiar name, the eatery has undergone some massive changes – both inside and out. Under new ownership by Max Gordon, Maurice Kusminsky, and Drew Nye,

the new Hogan’s has kept some of the restaurant’s traditions at the forefront: its dedication to making from-scratch, casual eats and its dedication to serving the local community. But those of us who knew the old Hogan’s might walk into the new space and feel like you’re in an entirely different restaurant. The once dark, cozy space has received a lift. The dark walls and low ceiling have been replaced by a more open floor plan, with the old booths removed and an added full-service bar. Upstairs, the restaurant has a private banquet room that can be used for anything from corporate lunches to wedding receptions. But the biggest change that has new and old Hogan’s customers alike buzzing about, is a simple three-letter phrase that has been poised on the tongue of many a conscious local eater: farm-to-table. And what does this mean, anyway? In our social-foodie culture, it’s easy for a term like farm-to-table to get lost in translation. It seems that across the nation – and in Rochester especially – there is a newfound call to consciousness for what we put on our plate and why. For Mike Love, Executive Chef at Hogan’s, it’s a simple concept; but in its simplicity, it requires

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a great deal of dedication, knowledge, and passion. For Mike, farm-to-table was never just a trending concept; it was a way of life, of family, of tradition. “I grew up in a household where we grew everything we ate. We had our own gardens, our own chickens, and we hunted and fished all year. Anything we wouldn’t eat my parents would preserve,” Mike said. This approach to food, what Mike calls “country chic” has stayed with him throughout his culinary career. Now, he wants to bring this understanding to Rochester. “We took on this project knowing that we wanted to keep the heart of Hogan’s Hideaway, but we wanted to imbue it with the farm-to-table platform,” Mike said. Each week, Mike works with over 40 purveyors across the Finger Lakes region, sourcing a large percentage of the Hogan’s menu locally. From the wasabi sprouts that add the juicy, fresh heat to the seared tuna appetizer to the intensely red strawberries on the seasonal artisanal salad, Mike takes care to craft his menu around ingredients that are readily available in the region in an effort to support local agriculture, global sustainability, and flavor profiles that satisfy in any given season. Despite the abundance of local produce available to Finger Lakes resident, the farm-to-table concept is a relatively new thing taking hold in the region. And while it’s a good trend, one that asks for accountability and awareness on both

the diner and restaurant’s behalf, it isn’t largely accessible to the community. Local, organic produce can be difficult and costly to source. Additionally, the movement is often conflated with fine dining. Paired with high price points in inaccessibility, it can be difficult for patrons to buy-in to this movement with seemingly good intentions. But with Hogan’s, a spot that’s known for its casual fare and ambiance, Love saw it as an opportunity to bridge the gap between fine dining and fast-casual. “We’re on the forward edge of doing casual farm-to-table food in Rochester, and I want Hogan’s to lead the way in that respect.” It’s clear that Hogan’s is making an effort to educate patrons on their new menu and what goes into it. When you walk in, a chalk board depicts the locally sourced specials in bright, playful letters: bread from Amazing Grains, goat cheese from First Light Creamery; the list goes on and on. And as I tuck into my artisanal salad, laden with local strawberries, first light goat cheese, and black pepper candied walnuts, I’m not sure if it’s a placebo of sorts but the freshness is apparent in every bite. Mike tells me the greens in the salad were delivered that morning and picked from their hotbox only hours ago. It brings to mind Alice Waters in California back in the day, eating leaves of lettuce still warm from the sun. But to say that the food is only notable for where its ingredients are sourced would

do Mike and Hogan’s as a whole grave injustice. Rather, I think that the freshness and honesty of each ingredient informs the chef ’s ability to build flavor profiles on seemingly familiar dishes that create an entirely new experience on the palate. Take the Bolognese, for example – it’s not your mother’s Bolognese. Made with smoked tomatoes, bacon, Italian sausage, capicola peppers and an Italian cheese blend, it might sound like an average bowl of pasta. But the dish in and of itself reads on the tongue like a magic trick. While the capicolas bring the heat to the dish, Mike uses three other types of peppers to build flavor and nuance, adding layer upon layer of flavor. Paired with the freshness of herbs and a perfectly hearty sauce, it proves to be a bowl of pasta to remember. Or the Tomahawk Chop, even. I grew up eating pork chops for dinner – many of us have. All the same, I rarely order one when I see it on the menu. But while eating this pork chop, perfectly cooked and seasoned just right, placed atop a mount of pesto mashed potatoes and topped with a seasonal fruit chutney, I realized a newfound appreciation for the familiar dish. And really guys, this is the kind of dish I love the most: one that bridges the gap between casual comfort food and conscious eating. The fact that I know where most of the ingredients came from on my plate, and that by eating them I’m helping the local economy and environment? Maybe it’s just me, but it makes eating out all the more delicious.

{ cooking with F.Olivers }

Olive Oil and Health Freshness is Key by PENELOPE PANKOW

Hippocrates, the father of modern medicine, called it “the great healer,” believing olive oil could fight disease and heal trauma. Thousands of years later we’re still reaping the health benefits of this fabulous liquid. A search of the National Institute of Health’s database shows scores of peer-reviewed, scientific studies that prove olive oil’s efficacy in fighting disease. It protects against certain cancers and heart disease, helps stabilize metabolism and fight obesity, aids in alleviating symptoms of arthritis, ulcerative colitis, and Alzheimer’s disease. and has the same anti inflammatory properties as ibuprofen. The benefits of olive oil are clear, but what isn’t always clear is that not all olive oil is created equal. Only fresh, high quality olive oil contains the properties that are most beneficial to your health. Ideally, any olive oil labeled as Extra Virgin would be of the highest quality. But labeling standards are not enforced in the United States and because most of us haven’t experienced the flavor of a truly fresh olive oil, the U.S. has become a dumping ground for oils labeled as Extra Virgin that don’t meet even the minimum standards. In order to find genuinely good olive oil, it is important to be armed with some basic knowledge. Olive oil is the epitome of an unprocessed food. It is produced simply, by pressing the oil from the olive then separating the oil from the solids and bottling it. The highest quality oil is produced from healthy olives picked at the exact right time and pressed within hours of picking. To retain the quality and freshness of the oil, it must be kept away from heat, light and air. Age is another enemy of olive oil, so it is important to use olive oil while it still maintains its health benefits and flavor. There are a number of ways that producers put profits over quality 52

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they leave the fruit on the tree too long, which increases yield but reduces the elements that provide the health benefits. They wait too long to crush the olives, often leaving them to rot in the sun for days after harvest. Unfortunately, some producers resort to actual fraud. They label oils as extra-virgin when they were produced chemically or add other, less expensive oils. Some producers don’t even use olive oil, instead adding flavoring to mimic the smell and color of olives. Another common practice is to produce olive oil in other countries and then ship it in tanks to be bottled in Italy and labeled as such. All of these practices significantly diminish the freshness and quality of the olive oil.

A study at the University of California at Davis set out to understand just how prolific these practices are. They found that 70% of the samples of imported oil failed to meet the standard of extra virgin due to, “(a) oxidation by exposure to elevated temperatures, light, and/or aging; (b) adulteration with cheaper refined olive oil; and (c) poor quality oil made from damaged and overripe olives, processing flaws, and/or improper oil storage.” So how do you know if your olive oil is what it says it is? One way is to buy from a reputable and knowledgeable business whose salespeople take the time to share their knowledge with you. The harvest date should be on the label. Olive oil should be consumed within 18 months of the harvest date. Beyond that date, its health benefits have dwindled. Much beyond that date olive oil will become rancid and may be damaging to your health. To keep olive oil fresh, keep it away from heat, light, and air. Be wary of olive oil stored or sold in clear glass as it will have suffered from light degradation. Look for olive oil that is stored in opaque tanks and has been freshly bottled in tinted bottles. Ideally, you should be able to taste the olive oil before you buy. While the health benefits alone make it desirable, the taste of truly fresh olive oil is a marvel. There is as much variety in olive oil as there is in wine. Being fresh and high quality isn’t enough if you don’t love the flavor. For further information about olive oil and where to find the best ones, Tom Mueller, an industry expert, maintains a site called truthinoliveoil.com , in which he provides information on what supermarket brands are reputable and directories of stores that provide highquality olive oils. It’s amazing that one of the most potent tools we have in fighting modern disease is thousands of years old. With a little education, you can easily find and enjoy this magic elixir.

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{ ON THE WAY UP }

1872 CAFE by CHARLOTTE SYMONDS

Entering through the heavy glass doors to the 1872 Café, I was hit with a sense of awe, for I was standing on hallowed land. I realized that the building I was entering stood on ground of historic value, as it was where Susan B. Anthony cast her first illegal vote. Walking towards the counter behind it stood a young woman whose sparkling personality poured out with only the sight of her amazingly welcoming smile, the warmth that emitted from her eyes with their meticulously applied black eyeliner and her full black attire. When I asked to speak with the working owner, I was surprised to learn it was she. Ms. Samantha Councilman, an attractive, twenty-eight year old is the working owner of the 1872 Café. For our interview we sat at one of the café’s tables which are surrounded by glass walls, allowing for the ambiance of the city to be in full view. The chair Ms. Councilman sat in had the only wall in the building behind her. The wall displays a drawing of Susan B. Anthony and in large print the words to the 19th amendment giving women in America the right to vote. This young woman amazed me when she spoke with such enthusiasm and conviction for the vision she has for the café. It surprised me to learn that she herself, who grew up in the small town of North Cohocton, prefers to work surrounded by diversity and right in the midst of the beating heart of the city. Ms. Councilman mentioned some of her ideas which she has already implemented at the 1872 Café. There is a monthly Family Game Night which, when weather permits, allows for the children from the neighborhood to engage in activities on the café’s property with their families. By bringing families together in play, she believes this has a positive impact on the community which her café serves. And, that is what she wants the café to be, a hub of the neighborhood. She wants the café to be a place where people want to come, a destination. 62

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They also have live music on the first Sunday of each month from 6pm to 9pm when the café is usually closed. The event is called The Gospel Open Mike Night. The event didn’t originate at this café. However, its location was moved there and recently held its first anniversary at the 1872 Café. The Gospel Open Mike Night is a free event for those who Ms. Councilman say live on the Voters Block (those living in the apartments across the street from the café and in the apartments behind the café) and admission is $5.00 for all others. The café took part, as did many other coffee shops in the Rochester area, on April 4, 2017 in the Equal Pay Day event which was sponsored by the N.O.W. organization (National Organization of Women). Ms. Councilman was featured with a sit down

interview on Fox News Network on that day promoting the event. Customers, who were men, were charged the regular menu prices. Women were charged 20% less for the same items. The reasoning behind the event was to make men aware that women whom they work with who are doing the same jobs are being paid 20% less. Ms. Councilman said that the male customers were all supportive of the idea for the event and many had no idea that the discrimination in salary was taking place. Those men said they had mothers, sisters, or daughters who worked and had no idea there was a salary discrepancy. She also had male customers who specifically came into the shop that day to purchase items as they had seen the Fox news piece and wanted to show their support for the cause. Ms. Councilmen said that she did not want to exclude men from her shop as she loves men. She explained that it wasn’t about hurting men by charging them more. Ms. Councilman saw the event as nothing more than an awareness experience for men. What Ms. Councilman didn’t expect were some of the phone calls and emails she received from the Fox news piece being aired on that day. She found it strange that the only men who called her to complain about the discount for women all came from other states. She received calls from as far away as California and Denver. She received numerous negative phone calls from men with her having to explain repeatedly how the day was not about being unfair to men but rather an awareness of the discrepancy of salaries. She realized that those she spoke with were not grasping the concept. By the end of the day of handling all these obnoxious calls Ms. Councilman had nothing left to say to these men except, “Why is it that no man complains when bars have free drinks for women events? Is it because you don’t have a chance to get laid with this event?” Another event that she has planned for the café is a monthly Author’s Spotlight. Ms. Councilman wants to be a platform

{ ON THE WAY UP } This young woman amazed me when she spoke with such enthusiasm and conviction for the vision she has for the cafĂŠ. It surprised me to learn that she herself, who grew up in the small town of North Cohocton, prefers to work surrounded by diversity and right in the midst of the beating heart of the city.

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

{ ON THE WAY UP }

for local female authors and help pull the community together and show what the women in this city have accomplished, what they are doing and what they are contributing to the world. She has already booked female authors for July, August and September. Next on her list is to find local female artists, as well, to start featuring their works at the 1872 Café. Ms. Councilman has, as she puts it, been “slinging coffee” for almost ten years now. It was how she worked her way through college. While in school, she first focused on photography then graphic design. She believes these ventures help her with the maintaining of all the café’s social media which include a FaceBook Page and an Instagram account. Both accounts can be found with the same user name 1872 Café. Ms. Councilman certainly manifests a sense of comfort and confidence when at the café. She proudly admits to enjoying being one of the first people someone meets in the morning when they stop in to get their coffee. As she states, “The first interactions you have with a person can set the mood for a person’s entire day.” She loves being that first person, and she is thrilled when she has a customer who comes in cranky and leaves with a smile. She takes great pride making a difference in peoples’ everyday lives, and it certainly shows. She has cultivated relationships with the regulars and enjoys 64

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meeting new customers and making their day just a little bit happier. When asked, Ms. Councilman admits that everything positive about her comes from being raised by such a strong single mother. She states, “My mother is the reason I am who I am, in any positive sense.” Although, in the same breath admits that she believes that her true love of the city must be in her DNA from her father’s side. Although, he was not present much in her life, he lived in the heart of the city. She feels that his love of the city has been passed down to her as she feels more comfortable and safer in this city than in her country hometown. Ms. Councilman wants to help change the ignominy attached to living on the Westside. She said, “There is a stigma attached to living on the Westside of the city. There is something about leaving the expressway and taking a left and going under the Broad Street Bridge that has a negative feel about it to people.” She believes there are good people here and that the stereotype of the Westside needs to change. With such fever she explained how this neighborhood was the one where Fredrick Douglas and Susan B. Anthony lived and where history was made. She has a sense of pride about the Westside that is exhibited whenever she speaks of it. This past 2016 presidential election was a popular day at the 1872 Café. It was full to

capacity. Women came from all around the county to watch the election on the one TV in the café, and to put their I VOTED stickers on the ballot box where Susan B. Anthony had placed her first illegal vote. When I learned that the actual ballot box that was used by Ms. Anthony was on the premises, I asked to see it. Ms. Councilman brought me to the courtyard and showed me the ballot box which is affixed to a stand. Watching her touch the box with a look of extreme reverence on her face made me aware of how much working at this café each day affects her. Ms. Councilman states that with each idea she has for the café, she asks herself, “What would Susan B. Anthony think of this idea”. She is perplexed as to why all women’s groups in the area do not hold their meetings at this café. I too, in agreement, cannot understand why women groups would not desire to hold their meetings there. For, if it wasn’t for women like Susan B. Anthony, those groups might not be in existence today. Plus, being a woman, you feel empowered just entering the door to this café. You can’t help but feel the importance of the café’s placement. After speaking with Ms. Councilman, hearing her longing for the hope she feels for the city’s future and the café’s neighborhood, you are left with the certainty that if anyone can pull it off it will definitely be her.

{ HER EDGE }

DR CYNTHIA MCGILL: AND HER PRICELESS VESSELS by Maja Millicevic-Klugh

“I’ve come to believe that each of us has a personal calling that’s as unique as a fingerprint – and that the best way to succeed is to discover what you love and then find a way to offer it to others in the form of service, working hard, and also allowing the energy of the universe to lead you.” -Oprah Winfrey

I have been very fortunate throughout my formative years and still today to be surrounded by inspiring men and women. At the age of 36, I feel I have only scraped the surface of everything I am yet to experience and achieve both professionally and personally. Through my journey, it has become clear that we need to do more to shine a light on the ambitious, successful women who dream big and achieve their personal and professional goals while staying true to themselves. But many girls and young women struggle to find similarly successful, relatable role models who can inspire them to imagine everything they could achieve and believe that each of those possibilities become a reality. Learning about the stories of these role models can help young women make educated choices about what suits them and then pursue their goals with passion and persistance. This is the story of Dr. Cynthia L. McGill, my role model. Dr. Cynthia L. McGill is the CoPastor of New Life Fellowship in Rochester, NY and is the Founder and President of Priceless Vessels, Inc. ®, a not-for-profit organization designed to empower women in leadership. She is also the author of the books, The Journey to Wholeness, and Sex and Marriage: Myths Uncovered. 66

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Dr. McGill studied at the University of Rochester where she was conferred with a Bachelor of Arts Degree in English. She gained a Master of Science in Instructional Technology from Rochester Institute of Technology. She crowned her educational pursuits with a Doctor of Philosophy Degree in Higher Education Administration from the State University of New York at Buffalo. Dr. McGill was Associate Provost at Rochester Institute of Technology for six years and an administrator of several programs at the Institute and other universities during her twenty (20)

year secular career. She has been mentoring young women for many years in her church, the Greater Rochester community and while employed at Rochester Institute of Technology. During her service at the Institute, she mentored many women into leadership positions. She has served the community in many capacities and been widely recognized for her efforts. Dr. McGill has been inducted into the Phi Kappa Phi Honor Society and was elected (1 of 100 women) a member of the esteemed “Leadership America” (1991), a national project organized by the Foundation of Women’s Resources. She has received numerous awards and honors, including: being named as a member of Outstanding Women of America in 1982; Rochester Women’s Network 2001 “W” Award Winner; “Women of Valor” 2001 Finalist for the American Diabetes Association; and Rochester Women’s Network Up and Coming Businesswomen’s Award, 2004. She received a Heritage Black Gala Award from the City of Rochester in 2012. She served as the 2009 President of Rochester Women’s Network, and subsequently as part of the RWN 2010 Executive Committee. Most recently, Dr. McGill determined to rebrand herself and the Priceless Vessels organization. Having begun Priceless Vessels (affectionately known as “PV”) over 10 years ago, she felt it time to branch out and expand the organization. During the winter of 2012, Dr. McGill sponsored her “Rebrand – Rejuvenate – Redefine: An Empowering Experience™” conference in which she hosted women at the Rochester Airport Marriott, in addition to guest speakers such as Jennifer Leonard and 13 WHAM News’ Norma Holland, encouraging the women to become empowered and whole: professionally, personally and spiritually.

In the spring of 2014, Dr. McGill and PV honored five (5) women of tremendous influence at a “Priceless Vessels Women of Power™ Awards Luncheon” with almost 100 guests in attendance. Over $2,600 was raised for the PV Scholarship Fund. Dr. McGill integrates a wealth of sound Bible truths with her individual experiences in a passionate style that presents women with a pathway that leads these vessels of honor toward their purpose. Thousands of women from all over the nation have been delivered and transformed at her lectures, workshops and now Priceless Vessels, Inc. ® Dr. McGill is married to former Bishop Reginald A. McGill, Founder and Senior Pastor of New

Life Fellowship. They have two beautiful daughters, a wonderful son-in-law and a precious granddaughter who is the love of their lives. Dr. Cynthia L. McGill also has been honored in 2017 by Links, Inc. for her empowering work on behalf of women through her organization, Priceless Vessels, Inc. Dr. Cynthia L. McGill is a great roll model because she is not simply a hard workers, but she is open and looking to share her experiences and learn from others. She is the kind of person you want to work for and be friends with. I don’t believe that there is a particular way a woman should be or that there is only one way she should be. But, I believe each woman should have the option to choose what she wants,

knowing at the beginning of every journey all the possible permutations of her dreams so that she can design her own path. Dr. Cynthia L. McGill is one of these women and the reason why she is my role model.

“You may encounter many defeats, but you must not be defeated. In fact, it may be necessary to encounter the defeats, so you can know who you are, what you can rise from, how you can still come out of it” -Maya Angelou

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

{ special feature { HER EDGE } } A Message From Dr. Cynthia McGill

PRICELESS VESSELS, INC.(PV) is an organization---more like a sisterhood--of ethnically diverse professional women who are empowered and empower other women to excel in their professional, spiritual and personal lives. Join us on THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 28, 2017 at 6:00 pm for our “Fall Kick-off Event” for “Rockin’ Women” only ~~ We will have an interactive discussion on “WHAT AM I WORTH” led by Dr. CYNTHIA MCGILL, PV’s President. Dinner, wine, sodas and dessert included for only $39.00 at the lovely Chatterbox Club. Go online to learn more and register: www.pricelessvessels.com

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

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WHEN WE ALL LOOK ALIKE by ROBERT L. BRENNA, JR.

The melting pot is almost boiling over. What will happen when we all look alike? Will we treat each other better? I try to be an optimist whenever possible, as fatalism does not suit my personality well. Some days when I am asked how I am doing, I reply “wonderful.” The simple fact is, I don’t like the alternatives. On the other hand, wearing unrealistically rose-colored glasses gives one such a false sense of euphoria that it likely does no good at all. My optimism extends to the fact that I recognize that whatever we allow ourselves to focus on and concentrate on directly controls our inner-self, our mood and the way we feel throughout the entire day. In some cases, it controls how we feel throughout our lifetime. I often have commented on and written about the fact that if we concentrate on incomprehensible suffering, or the fact that there may be so much trouble in the world that we are too small or insignificant to make a difference, we can become numb and catatonic. On the other hand, being realistic about our limitations can’t be avoided. Just reading the morning 72

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newspapers often is difficult.In Woody Allen’s new movie, Larry David humorously explains that his father killed himself because he couldn’t handle the daily headlines. Nonetheless, keeping your head buried in the sand is as unrealistic as it gets, and accomplishes nothing. The melting pot I mentioned is a term we use often to congratulate ourselves on the fact that our country has such a diverse racial, ethnic, religious and philosophical mix it truly allows us to cull the very best from various regions around the world. It

also allows groups to gather together to the exclusion of others, and often to the point of hatred. Sometimes it leads to violence. We are in a transition. There is no denying it. Eventually, our current ability to travel from place to place instantaneously will result in a recombination of the genetic pool. Within a few centuries, perhaps even only the next century, there likely will be very few, or maybe only one skin tone. The same is true with the shape of one’s eyes, facial characteristics and other features genetically imbedded in each of us. The optimist in me continues to hope — perhaps it’s better stated that I hope against hope — such evolution will not make us merely a bland undifferentiated mass, but instead will allow people the opportunity to judge one another based on true human characteristics rather than appearances. Let’s hope. Robert L. Brenna Jr. is a partner in the Rochester law firm of Brenna, Brenna & Boyce PLLC, which his father founded. He is president of the New York State Academy of Trial Lawyers and hosts a Sunday morning radio program,“The Brenna & Brenna Law Forum,” on WHAM 1180 AM at 8 a.m., online at www. wham1180.com.

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Date Adventure Into The Great Unknown by CASSONDRA KUBIT

Summer is here and vacations have started! With July being our travel and leisure issue Mike and I decided to take a trip full of adventure right here in our own backyard that many people don’t know about. If you know Mike and I personally you would know that our favorite place to visit is the Great Finger Lakes and all of New York’s beautiful State Parks. Throughout the Finger Lakes and New York we have over 200 waterfalls s p r e a d throughout the many nature walks. We have visited about half of them so far, but there is one place in New York that is truly re m a r k a b l e and you can only reach it by taking a 155-foot dip underground. As we all know by now, Mike and I have rules for our date nights:

1. No Dinner 2. No Bars 3. No Movies 4. And Most of All No Cellphones When we were planning our long weekend 74

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vacation we wanted something that was out of this world that not many people would have done. In our adventures in the Finger Lakes we had heard about these underground caverns that were a must see, Howe’s Caverns. We started to do some research and found our way there a few months back and did the

to see how deep the hole was. He tied himself to a long rope and climbed down. He spent many days down in the caverns exploring his discovery. He ended up buying the land from his neighbor and opened the caverns up for tours. His tours would take over 10 hours and they would go by lanterns to light their way. Nowadays there have been lights installed and walkways to walk on. While we were on this tour they guide was talking about the different tours that they offered.

Traditional Tour which was open to the public for the price of $23 apiece. We were truly blown away by what Mr. Howe discovered in 1842 by following his cows to his neighbor’s land on a hot day. The cows had found and underground airway that blew up cold air and cooled them off. Mr. Howe ended up deciding to take an adventure down into the darkness

T h e re w a s the Signature Rock Tour that would take you farther into the caverns passed the underground boat ride (Yes there is an awesome boat ride in the middle of the Traditional Tour. These boats had to be assembled in the caverns because they were too big to be brought down on the elevators. They have an Adventure Tour that takes you into another part of the caverns where Mr. Howe used to play his violin and set off bottle rockets to see how tall the ceilings were. There is also the lantern tour where they turn off all the lights and you get to travel the

caverns with lanterns like Mr. Howe did during his tours.

Were so intrigued by the caverns that we designed a trip around going back and doing the Adventure Tour at Howe’s Caverns. The Adventure Tour is a private tour that takes you to the man-made tunnel past the catacombs. You are suited up in a white suit, gloves, boots and a head lamp and are led into a dark hole, called the Fat Mans Trap.

to our guide Mohammad, or Mo. Mo took us outside and gave us a brief history of the land and where the caverns were and which way we would be going. Then he took us inside and we loaded up on the elevator. When we got out of the elevator we were greeted by a temperature of 53 degrees a 30-degrees difference from the surface. The temperature down in the caverns doesn’t change so it stays in the low fifties no matter the temperature on the surface.

When we got to Howe’s Caverns we filled out a waiver form. A little daunting, especially when it said we’d have to pay to evacuated if we got injured. After we signed our lives away we were introduced

Mo gave us a private tour of some of the Traditional Tour and gave us another take on the history of the Caverns and how truly old they were. He showed us the diverse types of rock formations

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

created underground and we were once again taken back by the grander of the caverns. I enjoyed the history of how Mr. Howe had travelled the caverns and what he did down in the darkness. Mo took us through the catacombs which are beautiful formations, but very close quarters. He led us to an area that is blocked off. We went through the blocked off area and came to a bin and a bench. Mo pulled out a white suit, boots, gloves, a helmet and headlights. Once we were suited up we looked over the edge of a pretty deep hole and I would say I actually didn’t want to go down into the darkness.

{ it’s a rw secret } Mo was a very informative guide who made the experience very exciting even when slipping and getting stuck in the mud. It was awesome to see what water had carved out in the earth and just thinking about the 155 feet of stone above our heads was a bit overwhelming.

But I paid a lot of money to turn back. We climbed safely down into the muddy hole and we discovered a world that hasn’t truly changed in thousands of years. Mo was a very informative guide who made the experience very exciting even when slipping and getting stuck in the mud. It was awesome to see what water had carved out in the earth and just thinking about the 155 feet of stone above our heads was a bit overwhelming. When we got to the end of tunnel we came to a body of water that Mike decided to take a step into. Mo told us that the only way to see what was behind the water you would have to scuba dive.

The tour took about 2 hours. We crawled out of the tunnel to find ourselves covered in mud. Mike ripped his whole suit and was covered from head to toe. I fared a little bit better with mud on my face and in my hair. We had a lot of fun. We would suggest those who want an adventure to check out Howe’s Caverns.

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: may 2017

BRANDON VICK BRANDONVICKPHOTOGRAPHY.COM

585-347-4900

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ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

{ festival fun with rwo }

Must See Festivals Of The Great Lakes

by julia antenucci

The Chinese Lantern Festival: April 14thJune 24nd From April 14th to June 24 at the New York State Fairgrounds in Syracuse, New York the Chinese Lantern Festival was held. If you got to experience the 30

different lantern displays then you got to appreciate the traditions of Chinese crafts and lantern making. Each display held pieces of the Chinese culture. There was a 200 foot-long dragon that graced the middle of the pond, there was the 12 zodiacs, panda bears, the Lotus Fairy and many other displays. There were traditional Chinese arts, food and performances. Watch for the Chinese Lantern Festival next year.

Festivals That Have Already Passed But Will Come Around Again

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

13th Annual Cherry Festival: June 24th-25th more info:

10th Annual Lavender Festival: July 8th-9th more info:

Varick Winery & Vineyard kicks off their cherry picking season with their Annual Cherry Festival. They bring in local venders with crafts and food. They set up outdoor wine and food tastings for the many different types of dressings, sauces, jams, food mixes, and cheeses that they offer in their Winery. You also have the chance to pick fresh cherries right off the trees. Varick Winery & Vineyard is a pick your own cherries until they are gone. Visit www. varickwinery.com for more information and save the date for the 14th Annual Cherry Festival.

Lockwood Lavender Farm is a place where you can pick from 18 different types of lavender. Every year Lockwood brings together local artisans and live music to kick off the Lavender Harvest. You can pick Lavender every weekend until the season is over. Check out http://lockwoodfarm.blogspot.com/ to learn more about their farm and mark your calendar for the 11th Lavender Festival.

JUNE 24-25

JULY 8-9

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Sterling Renaissance Festival more info:

5th Anniversary Finger Lakes Cheese Festival more info:

Come and meet the Queen or go to the Wench Auction! The Sterling Renaissance Festival runs every Saturday and Sunday from July 1st to August 13th. Each weekend has a different theme which changes the feel of the festival every weekend. There are multiple stages with performances at each one all throughout the day. There are comedy acts to sword fighting and jousting. You can sit down and have tea with the Queen or be married by her. There are tons of artisans and food, including the giant turkey legs. There are tons of games for the little kids to do as well. You can dress in your finest clothes of the Golden Age or come in your futuristic clothing of the 21st century. Check out http://www.sterlingfestival.com/ to find out more.

If you love cheese this is the place to be. At the 5th Annual Cheese Festival you will be graced with the flavors of the Finger Lakes Cheese, wine, cider and beer. Throughout the entire day there will be cheese pairs with wine, cider and beer. There will be a mozzarella making class, cooking with cheese class and a tour of Bergen Farm. Check out http:// www.flcheesetrail.com/2017-festival.html to find out more.

JULY 1AUG 16

JULY 22

Glimmer Glass Festival more info:

New York State Fair more info:

Glimmer Glass Festival starts July 7th with their grand opening play of Porgy and Bess. There are many different shows and dining throughout the whole festival that is dedicated to the fine arts. Check out https://glimmerglass.org/event/ to see all of the different acts that will be gracing the main stage and the second stage. You can also check out the Baseball Hall of Fame in Cooperstown.

The New York State Farm Is of course the largest Fair in New York State. This is where all of the county fairs get together and display their counties finest in agriculture, farm animals, flower arrangements, and crafts. Not only do you get to see the best of the best New York has to offer, there are hundreds of shop venders, wine makers, and food makers spread throughout the entire fair grounds. Come and check out the New York State Farm. Check out https:// nysfair.ny.gov/ and find out what days the admission is only $1.00.

JULY 7AUG 21

AUG 23SEPT 4

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

Naples Grape Festival more info:

The Naples Grape Festival is one of the largest festivals in the Finger Lakes. The whole of Naples comes out and sells their wares on their front lawns outside of the festival grounds. You need to park about a mile away to truly enjoy the whole town. There are garage and barn sales outside the festival. There are Grape Pies for sale everywhere. Inside the festival grounds you will come across every type of craft, there are food trucks from all over, and wineries and breweries selling their food and drink. Make sure you take the whole 2 days to enjoy everything they have to offer. Check out http:// naplesgrapefest.org/ to find out more.

SEPT 23-24

Rock N Roll Weekend more info:

Don’t miss this fun-filled Rock N Roll Weekend, presented by Northtown Auto that kicks off Friday, September 15th , 2017 in the evening with lots of live entertainment in all of the local hot spots. The fun continues Saturday the 16th as you enjoy Ellicottville’s eclectic shops and outstanding restaurants and more performances by regional musicians throughout the Village. Then, on Sunday, the show everyone loves to enjoy is back for its 18th year…the Classic Car Show set up on Ellicottville’s main street September 17th from 12-5 pm. Ellicottville is proud to showcase your cars, trucks, and rods all set up in class order to be judged by a panel of experienced car enthusiasts with awards in each class.

SEPT 17

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

fashion show ad

{ law and hip hop } by CHERYL KATES-BENMAN, esq.

Chino Belefante: Road Rage Tour Hits Rochester

As the former host of WAYO radio’s “Law and Hip Hop” show I continue to love to share up-andcoming artists with the world so you can appreciate them before they become famous like Drake and Rihanna. Doing this allows a music lover to appreciate the artist more as they develop and grow.

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

The music industry is far from a friendly place when struggling artists attempt to maneuver their way around seeking that one interest that gets them the deal changing their lives forever. This seldom happens and only a few chosen ones rise to the top. The industry has changed and now there is a greater emphasis on the artist developing a fan base on their own, demonstrating they exist through performances and music videos and getting that DJ to play your music. Even after all of that, you may just solely be Facebook famous. Doing all of this, yes, you guessed it costs money. Often times many talented people due to the lack of resources, being stuck in the criminal justice system or from living in poverty-stricken neighborhoods never get discovered. Or we have people who become one hit wonders- Ice, Ice Baby! Everyone should be able to follow their dream. Today everyone is a rapper or owns a record label, social media makes that possible. How do we tell the real from the fake in today’s world. You can make a music video on your phone or on an ap. The studio can be created on a computer. Most recently, I was invited to attend an event being held at local club 269 on Central Avenue in Rochester. I was excited to attend as a friend was one of

the rappers featured on the tour. This was the first stop for the concert tour “ Road Rage”. Chino Belefante came in early and did a special performance at the venue I work at Taylor’s nightclub. So it was awesome we were able to bring our customers a sneak peak into the tour. What a character Mr. Belefante is. Complete with gold grills and dreadlocks swinging in the air when he spits his knowledge out over the air waves. It was a show you didn’t want to miss. Being that I had a history of being on tour in the past I was familiar with “tour life”. You sleep where you can lay your head, sometimes you hit the store to buy some necessities instead of packing a suitcase, and nothing matters except when you step on that stage, in a packed house, and watch the people start mouthing the words of your song, bumping their fists in the air to the base of your song. The feeling is like no other. Every appearance requires a hot outfit, new kicks and hats of course. Your wingman must be on point along with your entourage. Often, it is your best friend riding it out or family members, who wait for the day, it becomes your turn and you become famous. Henny in the cup, smoke blowing up. What is sad is often you lose someone along the way. The prison door slams shut, violence

{ law and hip hop } by CHERYL KATES-BENMAN, esq.

ends a life or they give up and pursue something else. Chino was born in Bridgeport, CT. His early childhood was tough as his parents struggled with issues of addiction. Losing his father at an early age, was difficult. He began to assume the role of taking care of his younger brother forcing him to take on adult responsibilities while he himself was still a child. Unfortunately, Chino’s mom was unable to take care of the family and Chino and his brother became wardens of the state of Connecticut. The two boys were placed in a group home. As a teen Chino began working for the not-for-profit who ran the group home. He began developing an interest in rap and music. The home sponsored

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a community center. This center was equipped with a studio so Chino began learning about making music and this is where he started off in “the booth”. Chino and his brother “Third Lane Luciano” sampled industry beats and then began also making their own. The pair released a mix tape. Chino decided he needed to focus on getting an education and working. He attended college and obtained his Associate’s Degree. He watched as his brother began going down the wrong path and he stepped in to try to change that. The pair started Third Lane Music. Chino took on the role as manager and began managing his brother’s music career. Chino studied the music industry and

tried to keep his brother also focused on their goal of promoting his career. Chino’s brother was arrested and incarcerated. Chino then began to develop his career in the industry. He used music to express his frustration and feelings. Third Lane also promotes a clothing line. Chino recently stopped in Rochester, NY as the first stop on a national music tour. The Tour, “Road Rage” kicked off at Club 269 on Central Avenue. The tour will reconvene July 14th (Boston, Massachusetts; at Middle East)-15th(Providence, Rhode Island). The tour covers the whole East Coast. Some of the other artists on tour include Manolo Rose, Corey Finesse and Nula ENT. The tour is presented by Masters of the Road.

COUTURE BEAUTY PROFESSIONAL

585.755.4022 LINDSAY.DEROUEN@GMAIL.COM

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

{ priceless VESSELS } BY Dr. Cynthia McGill

How do we maximize what we have? How do we maximize our times, talents and resources? Here are a few pointers that work for me: 1) Be thankful for what you do have; stop lamenting what you don’t have. It certainly is easier to blame others or circumstances when you do not have something you need or want. I am trying more to be thankful for what I do have, then it seems to be enough: time, resources, etc. 2) When being asked to help volunteer on committees, stop saying “yes” to everyone and everything.

IF I ONLY...

How many times a day, week, month, year have I asked myself...”If I only had one more week”; “If I only had longer to finish that project”; “If I only ...”. Well, I don’t know about you but I have had to learn to maximize the time, opportunities, resources, the talents and gifts I have.

What is your purpose? What is your passion? If you like helping women succeed in business, stop being on committees that eat up all your time doing projects that are not related to your passion. 3) Just say, “no”!

interest BUT who is ethnically diverse from you. Just be honest and say, “I do not know anyone as interesting as you. Will you share 20 minutes with me over coffee? I am buying. And, we can tell each other a little bit about ourselves”. This world needs more of us adults --all ethically diverse---coming together and just chatting. Kids do it all the time and much easier than we do. 6) And, finally, be courageous! Be courageous and apologize to someone who has hurt you. You have been carrying around bitterness like a heavy stone on your chest. Yes, you read it right: s/he did YOU wrong. Watch and see how that “bitterness stone” breaks in you. Don’t wait for the other person to say a word! It is not for them, it is to set you free from this bitterness that is weighing you down and keeping you from moving on in your life and maximizing your potential!

Just say “no” to working 12 hour days---everyday! Stop the madness. Ask yourself is it worth it to work this much every day? Am I happy? Am I suffering--mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually and socially? Only you can answer this question and then bring about changes.

Remember, you want to lessen the times you say, “If I Only...”. I know I do!

4) Stop, breathe and think before you say another word in the heat of the moment.

From one priceless vessel to another,

By stopping (often, but still not enough) to breathe and think before speaking I have solved this one for sure--almost: “If I only had not said that”. I am sure I will get plenty of practice before I can say, I have accomplished this pointer all of the time :)

Dr. Cynthia L. McGill President, Priceless Vessels, Inc.

If any of these tips work for you, please send me a comment on our Priceless Vessels Facebook page: www. pricelessvessels.com

Cynthia

5) Connect.

Connect with someone you may have met briefly and who caught your ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

Embrace the strength of gentleness. www.sandyarena.com

Priceless Vessels, Inc. (PV) an organization---more like a sisterhood--of ethnically diverse professional women who are empowered and empower other women to excel in their professional, spiritual and personal lives.

All “Rockin’ Women” are Welcome! Join us on THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 28, 2017 at 6:00 pm for our “Fall Kick-off Event” for “Rockin’ Women” only ~~ We will have an interactive discussion on “WHAT AM I WORTH” led by Dr. CYNTHIA MCGILL, PV’s President. Dinner, wine, sodas and dessert included for only $39.00 at the lovely Chatterbox Club. Go online to learn more and register: www.pricelessvessels.com

{ fun in the sun }

SUMMER FUN RECIPES FOR YOUR BODY by CANDICE KORTS

From the wind to the rain, the ice and hail and crazy temperatures ranging from the 50’s straight into the 90’s, these past couple of months have been pretty damn taxing on all of us! It’s hard to make plans when you don’t know if you are coming or going thanks to good old Mother Nature who seemingly could use a happy pill or eight at this stage of the game! But fret no more my friends, because I have some fun home remedies to share on quick and easy all natural ways to get that skin prepped, those lashes looking amazing and those feet ready for Summer weather. Not a fan of chemicals? Me neither! Which is why I have spent the better part of the past three years post heart failure researching, testing and trialing my own holistic remedies that have all but replaced the seriously expensive, unhealthy and in many cases not at all like they are advertised products I have purchased in the last 20+ years of my adult life! <insert eye roll> The thought of how many tropical vacations I could have taken with all of that money!! Anyhow---moving on! I am a HUGE supporter and user of therapeutic essential oils. I do not say this because I am a self made money maker so no worries, this is NOT a sales pitch. I say this because they have proven to work in so many areas of my life that I cannot help but spread the knowledge I have gained in hopes of helping someone else out. With over 5,000 years history of documented use there has to be some validity in oils working right?! Essential oils and botanicals whether you realize it or not are in so much of what we buy over the counter 98

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and spend crazy money on for everyday items. Soaps, candles, shampoo, medicine, perfumes, deodorants and even food & drink...you name it, they are in there! I couldn’t possibly go over them all or tell you about them in just one article so for this Summer edition, I am going to focus on a few that can seriously help a sister out with some necessities of the season! Let’s Begin!

The largest organ of the human body I.E. your SKIN needs some basic care to keep it beautiful, protected and well cared for all of the time. Here is how you can help yours. Exfoliation--My favorite basic...THE ESSENTIAL SUGAR SCRUB! There is no better way to exfoliate that dead skin and grime off of your body more than a basic sugar scrub. This is not something I recommend doing daily as exfoliation should only need to be done 1-2 times per week if done consistently. Here is a basic recipe that you can add your own scent/ oil choice to and make it your own! Base1 C Raw Organic Sugarany brand is fine 2oz. Shea Butter (for moisture) 1oz. Coconut Oil Essential Oils- Here are just a couple ideas from one’s I have made along the way. At the end of this article I will reference a great, inexpensive oil guide where you can find your own favorites with definitions and benefits of use. For any recipe it is my advice to start with a few drops at a time mixing and adding until you reach your personal preference of strength/aroma being careful not to add more than 20 total drops total to one jar of scrub. Anything more than 20 is a waste of oil (just my opinion). Lavender: Lavender is such a widely used oil

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

{ fun in the sun } I am a HUGE supporter and user of therapeutic essential oils. I do not say this because I am a self made money maker so no worries, this is NOT a sales pitch. I say this because they have proven to work in so many areas of my life that I cannot help but spread the knowledge I have gained in hopes of helping someone else out.

therapeutic effects. It’s most prominent being anxiety relief and relaxation not to mention the fantastic smell it has!

Lemon: Aside from the awesome smell of citrus, lemon is known for cleansing and purification. Studies have also shown lemon to aid in nourishing the skin. Need I say more?! Eucalyptus: I love this oil for use in lifting my mood, helping with headaches or sinus congestion and even allergies. **These are single blend oils or “raw” oils as some refer to them. If you want more bang for your buck check out the blended oils as well at the link below! If you wish to purchase or learn more about YLO, I have listed information at the end of this article! www.youngliving.com/en_US/products Directions: Using a standard or hand held mixer add all of the ingredients together in a bowl and mix until well blended. Store in an airtight container, my favorite thing to use is a small glass mason jar. Glass does not absorb and keep the scent of anything stored in it like other materials such as plastic do, so reusing is always an option if you decide to change up your oils.

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Protect Your Skin! Sunscreen and AfterSun are a must when you plan a day outside. Do not let the clouds that may exist fool you. You can burn just as fast in the clouds as you can in the sun!

Myrrh - 15 drops Lavender - 5 drops Add to the base ingredients and mix well. Transfer to an airtight container and store for up to 6 months. Apply and reapply as needed.

EO Sun “protectant” as I call it is my favorite recipe out of the many I have tried. I cannot give you an exact SPF rating as I am no chemist, what I can tell you is that this has stood up to some of the OTC brands I have bought with an SPF of 50. Now, mind you I am Irish and I am white as a ghost, so if it works on me, then there is a good chance it’ll work for you, but again as with anything bought or made, please test it for yourself before depending on it!

AfterTheSun--- for those awesome days when you realize AFTER it is too late that maybe you overdid it! Shower and clean burned skin prior to use. Apply liberally to all areas as often as necessary to help relieve and heal the skin. Let’s be smart about this and understand the difference between a minor sunburn and the more dangerous burns caused by sun poisoning. If you are nauseous, vomiting, dehydrated, dry to the bone or feel the least bit like something is not normal after being burned in the sun, please consult a healthcare professional. More serious burns may need medical care that this simple salve will not give you!

Base:

½ C Coconut Oil ½ C Shea Butter ¼ C Beezwax Pellets (waterproofing quality) In a double boiler or in a bowl over a pot of boiling water heat these ingredients stirring occasionally until they are well combined. Remove from heat.

Essential Oils:

Carrot Seed - 15 drops

Base:

6 Tablespoons 100% Pure Organic Aloe Vera Gel 30 Drops Lavender Essential Oil 30 Drops Peppermint Essential Oil 6oz or larger hermetic jar

with the end of a fork or spoon (Super classy I know!) stir the mix together well. Lavender has natural healing properties for scrapes and burns. It also aids in the itching and dryness caused by sunburn. Peppermint aids in cooling the burn, drawing out the heat as well as pain relief qualities. Together these two along with the aloe are a tag team not to be defeated by sun! Your skin will go from red to tan in no time. It is important to use immediately following the sunburn and every few hours as needed or when the skin becomes painful or itchy. A little added bonus for you ladies and gents that have wicked tired and pained feet from being smooshed in sandals all day running around in the sun, here is a great simple salt soak for those tired puppies that’ll make you feel like a million bucks. 3oz. Hermetic jar 3 Tbsp Sea Salt (do not use fine ground) 1 Tbsp Epsom Salt 10 drops Lavender Essential Oil Mix all ingredients together in a bowl, transfer

to glass jar for storage. For use- Fill a plastic container large enough for your feet with hot water. Add 1 Tbsp of salt mixture and soak your feet until you feel better or until the water is no longer warm! Towel dry your feet, moisturize and relax…...you’re welcome!!! As I promised here are the links for the published guide I use for essential oils as well as contact information for myself if you wish to know more first hand. In order to purchase essential oils you must either be a member to receive wholesale cost or have a member’s ID when ordering at retail cost. Membership is nothing more than the purchase of a starter kit of your choosing with a wide range of budget friendly choices which will allow you to buy future oils at wholesale instead of retail cost. There is no monthly or annual fees, no website you must keep up and pay for and no minimum sales. You simply go on and purchase at your leisure at least a couple times a year to maintain active status. Oil costs vary depending on demand, availability and start at as little as $11. I chose the option of membership because the starter kit is not only a huge bargain, but I knew I would be spending enough money

in oils and supplies to warrant the savings. This may be you, it may not. Either way, I have you covered. I will not contact you, add you to a never ending email distribution list, make you part of a “tribe” or any other crazy thing, as I do not have time for that. Not that I am against those that do, more power to ya lady, have at it!!! I will also not monitor your spending or babysit your membership use----that is ALL you LOL. What I will do is answer any questions you have or direct you to any reliable resource I know that can assist, show you the in’s and out’s if you wish from my own trial and error. That’s it, that simple! For the publication on oils visit the link below to order (I am not paid for this, nor do I get any sort of kickback, a member’s ID or a membership is not necessary): https://www.discoverlsp.com/all-books/7th-editionessential-oil-pocket-reference.html For ordering YLO Essential Oils or for more information please email me direct at: Candice.Korts@gmail.com

{ rochester drinks }

SUMMER IS CALLING... by JASON PIERCE

When the weather calls for beaches and boats many of us reach for 12 ounce cans and bottles as our choice for adult beverages. There is no doubt that hitting the beer isle in the grocery store and packing a cooler with a 30 pack and some ice is convenient and easy, but we all know we can do better. RWO and Rochester Drinks want to encourage you to look beyond lawnmower beer, summer ales, and malt beverages to expertly crafted cocktails and tiki inspired concoctions. Summer is a time for rum, gin, and of course vodka. Fortunately, these spirits are incredibly versatile and a few bottles of favorites from your local liquor store can open a world of options for you and your guests. Plus, these days many of the most popular brands like Smirnoff vodka and Captain Morgan rum are available in plastic so you can make great cocktails anywhere the season takes you. We recommend a simple to assemble “Spritz Bar”. Start with a 1.75 Liter bottle of vodka, a 1.75 Liter bottle of rum, a smaller bottle of gin, a bottle of Aperol (an Italian 102

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aperitif), a couple bottles of sweet white wine, a case of 187ml bottles of champagne or sparkling wine, and finally a selection of Fee Brothers bitters. Make sure you have plenty of ice on hand and red solo cups will do unless you want something fancier.

A fresh fruit and berry tray doubles as an appetizer and great cocktail ingredients. Small bottles of juice and large bottles of club soda will make it easily understood that a “spritz” is meant to be light and refreshing. Each guest can customize a spritz cocktail to their individual taste, but the intention is to keep things light, so you can have more than one. Save the boozy martinis and whiskey drinks for after dinner has been served and the sun has gone down. Those who prefer less alcohol can use a smaller portion of spirit or opt for a wine cocktail. Gluten free guests will have tons of options. And friends who are counting calories can tailor a mix that will work with their diet. As a host, you can easily print out recipe cards for the most popular cocktails, but we find that most people like to experiment and create their own signature mix. Here is one of our favorites: 1.5 ounces Nolet’s Silver gin, 1 ounce Aperol, ½ ounce grapefruit juice, a large slice of grapefruit, and 3 ounces of seltzer in a large wine glass over ice.

Don’t forget to take lots of pictures and tag #RWO and #RochesterDrinks when you post

RWO and Rochester Drinks want to encourage you to look beyond lawnmower beer, summer ales, and malt beverages to expertly crafted cocktails and tiki inspire concoctions. Summer is a time for rum, gin, and of course vodka.

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

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{ rochester woman foodie }

THE JOY OF COOKING RIGHT OUTSIDE YOUR DOOR

Imagine, walking through your patio door to find breakfast, freshly growing.

bY DEBBIE SANTILLO

By gardening, you cut the cost of purchasing produce and it’s fresh and available. Gardening to eat can be so rewarding, smart, cost-saving and delicious. When most speak or think about gardening, they think of beautiful, colorful flowers or shrubs. My home certainly presents without a shortage of those. It’s fair to say, my home has “curb appeal”. Beautiful hanging baskets, flowering trees and a colorful array of perennials and annuals. Surprisingly, if you look hard enough you will see I planted my summer vegetable garden along-side all of those plants. My love for gardening began as “curb appeal”. However, as soon as I began to experiment growing my own fruits, vegetables, and herbs, there was no turning back. Planting design is the key. When planting, it is an adventure to mix the vegetables into gardens along with flowers. Depending on the kind, some are planted directly in the ground, others are reserved to pots. Gardening in this manner requires a few things; patience, water, sunlight and good soil. Many of the vegetables and fruits which are produced can be preserved to eat later. Freezing and canning will provide fruit and vegetables all year long! Fruit trees take a few years to manifest and must be planted in groups of at least two, so bees can go back and forth pollinating them. So, whatever fruit is your true love,

plant two or more. My yard has two peach, one nectarine, and one pear tree. But our next-door neighbor liked the idea so much, they planted two pear trees right near our lot line, so all of the trees benefit from each other. Ever-growing strawberries can be potted right outside the door. This crop is one which will come back year-after-year with little preparation. At the end of the growing season, place the pots away in a back garage near a window while the leaves are still alive. By May, take them back out, feed them some plant food, give them plenty of water, and there you go. Strawberry shortcake anyone? Planting fresh herbs is a culinary delight. Use a fairly big pot with good soil, plant one herb plant into each pot, feed them, water them, and you have fresh basil, rosemary, cilantro, oregano, thyme and whatever else you want at your fingertips. As the season moves on, and the plants get big, you can snip the flowers off of each plant, so that they will continue to grow. Herbs can be dried. Cut some occasionally, bind the stems with a rubber band and hang them upside down in a dry part of the garage. Let them dry up for about 5 weeks, then put them individually into a zip-lock bag by pulling all the herbs off the stems. Herbs all Winter! Now vegetables are a different story. ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

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Thinking of what’s for lunch or dinner tonight? Go outside and see what grew to a good size, pick it and create the menu around your vegetables! It is such a healthy and satisfying way to eat. Asparagus will not produce the first year. Zucchini, Yellow Squash, Eggplant and Butternut Squash are fairly easy to grow. Some grow on vines. Make sure they are planted where there is length to your garden. Growing vegetables in pots is possible if you do not have a large yard. Eggplant, tomatoes, green, red, yellow, and banana peppers and cucumbers do well. Thinking of what’s for lunch or dinner tonight? Go outside and see what grew to a good size, pick it and create the menu around your vegetables! It is such a healthy and satisfying way to eat. One of my favorite things to cook is to cut up three tomatoes, two different colored peppers, a green zucchini, a large eggplant and yellow squash. Chop up a few cloves of garlic and add a large onion. Sauté 106

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all that together, adding fresh basil, salt and pepper. Now you have a wonderful, Ratatouille. Add some rice or pasta to go with it and you have a meal. It’s extremely inexpensive, delicious, and not any harder to make other than picking your vegetables, washing them, chopping, and cooking them. Top it all off with some cheddar cheese. Need meat, go ahead, grill a chicken breast, whatever you want. The point is, you just made dinner or lunch with a small effort and for the most part was free, other than your initial plant cost. Butternut squash is also so tasty and easy to cook. Go out to your garden, pick a big one! Cut off the two ends. It will take a large, strong knife. Then cut it lengthwise and place in a baking dish with enough water to half cover the two halves face down. Rub just a little oil on the exposed

skin. Bake at 400 degrees and cover it with foil. Once it gets tender take it out of the oven. It will take close to an hour. Carefully remove the seeds and liquid from the cavity, then with a knife peel off the soft skin. Now take the squash, cut it up a bit, and mash with lots of butter, a very small dash of nutmeg, and a lot of brown sugar. I think I can make a meal of that alone. I love it so much and you will too! The whole point is along-side pretty flowers you can mix wonderful food, right outside your door. The feeling is hard to describe, but I guarantee you that once you get the hang of it, you will be hooked season after season! Once seeing how beautiful a combination garden can be my hope is I inspired all of you to try to start your own.

{ tips for women }

CBD - What is it and what can it do for you? by MAUREEN TA

Cannabidiol (CBD) is one of the most abundant cannabinoids found in the cannabis (hemp) plant. Unlike THC, CBD is completely non-psychoactive. CBD has started to become more “mainstream” as it’s therapeutic potential is being realized. This important cannabinoid relieves symptoms associated with inflammatory disorders (arthritis, fibromyalgia, RA), anxiety, depression, neurologic disorders (multiple sclerosis, Alzheimer’s disease), chronic pain, and PTSD just to name a few. Kannaway’s products are unique and potent. We have products that contain CBD ONLY and products with a full spectrum of essential plant complex. We a l s o h a v e exclusive access to the time-tested Korean Bibong herbal formulation. Hemp is meant to be a part of our food chain. All humans have a system in our bodies known as the Endocannabinoid Sy s t e m ( E C S ) that is starving for cannabinoids. T h e Endocannabionid System is responsible for regulation of mood, memory, 108

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motor control, immune function, pain perception, appetite, and sleep to name a few things. In addition to our ingestible products, we have a HEMP VAP that contains 100mg of CBD with terpenes and a skin care line. Our TOPICAL SALVE is amazing for treating sore muscles or to use as a carrier for our essential oils. The quality, harvesting, extraction, sourcing,

and lab-testing of our CBD are unmatched in this industry. Kannaway’s CBD oil comes from family farms in Austria, from a special high CBD cultivar, grown sustainably, without any chemicals (pesticide-free, herbicide-free, fertilizer-free), non-GMO, and undergoes a 3rd party testing process. It is then manufactured in California. Yes, you can purchase CBD from many different sources, but it’s important to know WHERE the hemp was grown because hemp is a bio-accumulator meaning it will absorb anything from the ground it is grown in. Our products are 100% organic and triple lab tested for quality and consistency. They are also legal in all 50 states and DEA compliant. When you purchase our products, you can be assured you are getting what you are paying for. I would love to talk to anyone interested in learning more about CBD. You can contact me through FB or email (moetanp@ gmail.com). Maureen Ta – Director, Kannaway

Everyone of us will be touched by dementia in some way as we age. Why not be prepared? Meet Ann and Vicky, two of the best friends you never knew you had, as they take you on their personal journey. Experience their days with dementia as caregivers for their husbands during the final years. Laugh and cry as you learn along with them. You’ll be glad you did! 5-star reviews! www.amazon.com $15.95 ($3.99)

Available in paperback and e-reader Singing in the Rain: Weathering the Storm of Dementia with Humor, Love, & Patience …………by Vicky Ruppert & Ann Henderberg theraingrouppress@gmail.com

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M { all about m.e. } by mary elizabeth nesser

Statistics tell us that money and sex are the leading contributors to divorce. In this economy, it is easy to understand why money, or the lack thereof, can cause stress and anxiety in a relationship. And if couples argue a lot, it makes sense that they won’t want to have sex. But if money is an issue and you can figure out a way not to argue about it, then shouldn’t you be saving money by staying home and doing it more?

S ummer I s T he P erfect T ime T o S pice U p Your Sex Life!

Men and women need sex. It is natural and necessary. So why is it when the average couple gets married or is involved in a long term relationship, the frequency of sex not only wanes, but, in many instances, dwindles into oblivion?

No one will argue that life can be stressful. But, in my opinion, nothing can reduce stress more than a mind-blowing orgasm. So let’s try to remember how your relationship was in the beginning when you were humping like rabbits and smiling all of the time. Obviously, it is important to take care of your primal urges. And there are times when it is necessary to take matters into your own hands (pun intended), but I would like to believe that your solo behavior isn’t as satisfying as a good romp with your partner. If your hand does give you more pleasure than your partner, however, you need a different mate.

other parts to focus on. That also goes for the guys and their insecurities.

5. You cannot just be nice to us in the

bedroom. If you are argumentative or belligerent during the day, there is no way you are getting any that night. When you piss us off, we will remain pissed off right back at you. And we can stay pissed off for very long periods of time. If you are kind and complimentary during the day, you’ll have a better chance of scoring at night.

6. If you treat each other with respect and

admiration, your partner will reciprocate in kind. If you criticize her parenting skills or the way she cooks or how she spends her money, she will feel anger and resentment straight to her loins. This goes both ways.

7. If you are bored on the bedroom, chances

So how do we go from once a month, missionary position, let’s-get-this-encounterover-with to passionate and breathless porn star sex?

are pretty good that she is just as bored. If you could read her mind during one of your monthly, monotonous romps, chances are she is in the South of France with Orlando Bloom kissing every square inch of her body. Be creative. Be spontaneous. Be passionate. It should be obvious, even to the Alpha-Male why women read trashy romance novels. They want the trashy and the romance.

1. Unless you are watching porn, turn the

8. Remember your manners. Burping,

television off. A woman hates feeling second fiddle to a Lakers game. Even If you pretend that all of your attention is on her, she knows that you are fully aware of the score and even who has fouled out. Why not turn on the music that got you riled up when you were 16 or put on music that you know gets her going. Whether she likes Marvin Gaye or Enya, don’t be particular. Be happy you’re getting some.

2. If you can spend three hours playing video

games or scrolling through Facebook, there is no reason you can’t spend thirty minutes making love to one another.

3. Don’t expect a quickie every time. A

woman’s body and mind take longer to warm up. Quickies once in awhile are okay, but if that’s all you want to do, trust me, she won’t be happy.

4. Most women are very self-conscious

about some part of their body. If a girl has love handles, don’t hang onto them. That is the only thing she’ll think about and the sex will be unsatisfying. There are plenty of

farting and scratching your scrotum are a huge turn off.

9. Don’t forget to groom. Globs of deodorant under your arms or sweaty, matted pubic hair will not get her juices flowing. Shower regularly, brush your teeth, get a haircut, trim your excessively long body hair, and spray on some cologne.

10. Go to the gym or do something that remotely resembles physical activity. Most women don’t fantasize about a fat, sloppy guy sweeping them off their feet. If you’re a big guy, still try to keep yourself fit. Women do have fears about you having a heart attack when you are on top.

If you continue to co-exist in a sexless relationship, one of you is bound to stray. As I said in the beginning, men and women need and want sex. If you are in a relationship and you dig the girl, put a little effort into it. Remember how hard you tried in the beginning? Well, now you got the girl so you don’t have to try as hard, but you still have to try, or you’ll never be hard with her again. ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

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self love love }} {{ self

Soul S

FOR THE S 112

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Sense

SUMMER

{ soul sense } BY BETH LYNCH

When we think of summer the senses coming alive. The sun shines brighter and longer. We feel active in the summer, we want to get outside and embrace the freedom of the season. Memories are often made throughout with family and friends. We venture out of routine to discover new landscapes, naturally drawn to water, laughter and play. Of course, sharing these times with those we love and new-found family and friends. The planet and all that inhabit her adjust to the seasons and summer seems to bring a laid back and enjoy mindset. Happiness seems to fill the heart in the simplicity of a sunny day, warm breeze and starry sky. A cleansing rain, open windows and catching up on cleaning out the clutter of heavy clothes, jackets and boots feels freeing. Summer is here! Nature is the closest we can get to being with our true self, the essence of the Soul is subtle, comforting and bright. Much like the summer season we find a moment of summer time is as sacred as moments of silence, walking in nature and allowing yourself to be in creative expression, in any of the seasons. It is important to grasp these moments when we can no matter what season. In times of sadness, fear, grief or uncertainty we need to of course allow the feelings we have but just like when the seasons change and sometimes overnight we must embrace

the power to change the emotions. To bring light, comfort and power to these feelings is symbolic to a sitting by a fire, wrapped in a soft blanket on a cold winter day. We begin to warm up, feel safe and even smile at the fire that warms our soul in that moment. Let’s take look at this from the energy/ spiritual system for a moment. The third chakra located in the center of the torso is our mental doorway. It is like the hub of the nervous system. Our intuition signals in this center. We all have intuition, some listen and nurture it more than others. We all have had the “gut” feeling, going against it we all say, I should have listened to my gut! Think of this center as the sun, shining rays of light throughout the body and into cells and systems. Every thought you have carries a vibration to all systems, including the energy field around you. The Law of Attraction in all its power is drawing things to you, holding things still and possibly repelling because of your thought patterns and perception of life. When you realize the power of thought is creating your reality you will see the power of the solar “sun” and plexus “network of nerves” is the battery for your energy system. The mother board for the Law to attract the frequency of what you put forward. So, whatever the season know you are intuitively and intellectually connected to your Soul’s wisdom. The spirit of living a happy, healthy and abundant life is a breath away. Take time to be present with this part of yourself. It will give you moments of clarity, confidence and energy you need to act on the situations at hand, heal where you have been and create the life you deserve. Let the sun shine in on your heart, mind and body through the power of your Soul sense. Beth Lynch has been helping family heal and understand life, death and all that is in between for over twenty years. Loss of a loved one is often a time we need to reach into our Soul for strength and understanding. Communication with the other side can help loved ones heal and know they are still with us in the way they can be. For more on Lynch’s services or to schedule a session visit www.innerlightteaching.com ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

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{ A FEW MORTGAGE TIPS }

6 Common Myths About Home Buying & Mortgage Rates by PHYLLIS HABERER

Buying a home can be frustrating and intimidating, especially if you’re relying on advice from friends and family members who purchased their homes years ago. I recommend turning to a professional instead if you want the home of the dreams and affordable mortgage rates. Financing a home is a complex process that depends on professional insight and accurate information. Unfortunately, buyers are surrounded by pervasive myths and misunderstandings on almost every aspect of the industry, from negotiating a sale to securing the best mortgage rates. Today I’d like to debunk 6 of the most common myths surrounding home financing. With these tips, homebuyers will have a much more pleasant experience, with as few complications as possible! If you’re in the market for a home, you might have heard a few of the following myths:

Myth #1: Find a Home First

Some people might tell you to find the home you’re looking for first. After all, how else will you know you’re really serious until you find a property you love? Unfortunately, you might get your heart set on something, only to find that you don’t qualify or someone else can make a higher offer. Your best bet is to apply for pre-approval instead. With a Pre-Approval from Premium Mortgage, not only will you have an understanding of how much you can afford, but you will show credibility to real estate agents, who will want to know that you are serious about purchasing, and can qualify for financing.

Myth #2: Go For a Longer-Term Loan

While the monthly payments for a 30year loan may be lower, you’ll almost certainly wind up paying more for your home in the long run. Another option is to go for a 15-year fixed-rate loan if you can afford the monthly payments. There are dozens of mortgage programs available, and everyone’s situation is different. Talking with a professional loan originator such as

myself will help determine the term that’s best for your own unique circumstances. Give me a call to learn more!

Myth #3: You Need to Put 20% Down

Of course, the more you can put down on your home, the better, as your monthly payments will go down and you’ll end up paying less in interest over the life of the loan. But sometimes a 20% down payment is simply impossible, especially if you live in a hot market with steadily climbing property values. Fortunately, some lenders such as Premium Mortgage will offer mortgages with as little as 3% down, and there are even a few products that require no down payment! Give me a call – there are a number of home financing programs with a multitude of options for down payment. Your options might surprise you!

Myth #4: A Down Payment is the Only Up-Front Expense

Buying a home involves a long list of costs and fees, which may amount to thousands of dollars. For instance, you may be liable for the closing costs — which could be as much as 2-5% of the purchase price — as well as the

home appraisal, processing, underwriting, and variety of additional expenses. I’d be happy to sit down with you and go over your individual circumstances, so that you have a better understanding of what your closing costs might be.

Myth #5: You Need Excellent Credit

While this may be the case for securing a traditional loan, FHA loan programs, for example, offer homebuyers with less-than-perfect credit a chance to invest in their futures and allow you to start with a much lower down payment. Also note, your credit score is can be improved over time with the proper steps taken.

Myth #6: You May Skip The Inspection

In short, while it is not mandatory, we never recommend for a buyer to waive the home inspection. Purchasing problems you don’t know about could wind up costing you thousands of dollars to fix in the not-so-distant future, easily offsetting the few hundred dollars you save waiving the inspection. Don’t take shortcuts! You will be a lot better off, and with much less stress if you take my advice and go ahead with the home inspection before you purchase! _____ Now that we’ve busted these common myths, I trust that you’ll go into the home buying process with more confidence, better information, and the professional resources you need to make the process as easy (and affordable) as possible! Whether you’re a first-time homebuyer or an experienced investor, I am committed to helping you secure the financing you need. As I mentioned earlier, a Pre-Approval from Premium Mortgage is the best place to get started, and it’s totally free! To learn more about our services and current mortgage rates, call give me a call at (585) 314-8511, or visit our website to find your nearest location and apply for a loan: www.premiummortgage. com. You can also connect with me on Facebook (/MtgageGirl ) and Twitter (@ MTGAGEGIRL)

Home is where your story begins... Let us help you write the First Chapter The Local Expert in Home Financing

Phyllis Haberer

2016

Senior Loan Officer | NMLS# 58078

585.314.8511 CALL OR TEXT!

585.363.7087 585.241.0000 x104

(cell)

(direct) (office)

Phyllis@PremiumMortgage.com

Call me today for a FREE, no-obligation Pre-Approval!

shop local! Phyllis Haberer is a Rochester native and Fairport H.S. Grad TEMPS ARE GETTING HOTTER, AND SO IS THE HOUSING MARKET!

Contact Phyllis Haberer today! 585.314.8511

Many Financing Programs Available! CONVENTIONAL · FHA · USDA · 203K · VA · PORTFOLIO

www.PremiumMortgage.com

PrmMtg

2541 Monroe Avenue, Rochester, NY 14618 | (585) 241-0000 | Equal Housing Lender | NMLS# 3254 | Licensed Mortgage Banker NYSDFS

{ mary sells the lakes }

Lets Get Ready for Summer on the Lakes by MARY ST. GEORGE

We are so fortunate to live in the midst of such natural beauty, the rolling hillsides, the tapestry of farmlands, the cool, relaxing waters of the Finger Lakes and the taste tempting samples of wines, beers and liquors made right here in this land of beauty we know as home. There are winery trails, craft brew trails and even distillery trails. A little something for everyone. What better way is there to enjoy summer on the lakes than with your very own summer home on one of the eleven Finger Lakes? A lakefront home means boating, fishing, swimming kayaking, or just relaxing in a comfortable chair enjoying your favorite cocktails. At night it means watching and catching fireflies, gazing into a campfire or roasting marshmallows. Memories are created at summer homes. Lakefront homes are gathering places for friends and family large and small. They are also places to enjoy the ease of summer eats such as various foods on the grill, cool summer salads and fresh produce from the local garden stands. Corn on the cob, fruit cobbler, salt potatoes and fresh juicy peaches all invite images of dinners enjoyed with the setting sun and subtle breezes. You will find some restaurants that specialize in farm to table food offerings and they wow you with their culinary delights. There is an abundance of local farm stands and fresh baked goods. And the little stand selling fresh picked flowers will offer the perfect bouquet to brighten up your dining table. Bathing suits, shorts and t-shirts are basic clothing requirements when at the lake. Water shoes and flip flops can be found scattered around with colorful beach towels and assorted life jackets. At night the board games come out and the sounds of laughter gear up. 116

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At the lake there are no worries. A day of fun in the sun and fresh air turns into a well deserved sleep as the curtains gently wisp around with the light night breezes. There are no deadlines or angry faces. There is no intended traffic, only lines for ice cream and go-cart rides. It is a time of much needed “down” time, to simply see the world as a place to enjoy and to savor the precious moments experienced while giving your time up to the lake. Each of the eleven Finger Lakes displays a uniqueness to each other. Some are surrounded by wineries such as Cayuga, Seneca and Keuka. Mixed in among the wineries, you will also find numerous craft breweries and distilleries. Many of these wineries have earned high praise and awards from various wine industry judges and events. All of the lakes are surrounded with farmlands and a couple of the smaller lakes are used for drinking water. These lakes do not allow power boats. Seneca Lake is the deepest of the lakes and Cayuga

Lake is the longest. You will find many sailboats on these two large lakes. Towns and villages can usually be found at the top and bottom of most of the lakes, with many offering banks, medical services, restaurants and shops. On the north end of Owasco Lake you can spend your night enjoying a wonderful play, or maybe listen to open air music in any of a number of outdoor venues. It could be an intimate jazz group playing on a courtyard lawn or a major music venue at a large outdoor shell. What ever fancies you, you will find it in the Finger Lakes. You will find a ton of choices when it comes to the style of vacation homes such as a charming vintage cottage with the simple basics, a year round home with all off the amenities just like at home or a sprawling compound for your entire group or a mixture of all . And when you own a summer home on any one of the lakes, you will be gifted with unending possibilities to make it your own. The subtle sounds of waves hitting the shore, the musical chirping of frogs and the leaves rustling with the summer breezes will bring you back again and again. When you come to the lakes, the lakes stay with you and the attraction gets into your blood…you will always be back. You will enjoy new friendships and a camaraderie with others around the lake, as only other lakers will understand. You will talk about the fishing, the best wines, the diving, the new builds land where the best sandwiches can be found. So give in to the desire that keeps calling you and make summer time living in the Finger Lakes your style of living and a new part of your lifestyle.

Buying or Selling?

Mary Sells the Lakes!

Concerned about rising costs? Wondering what your home is worth? Get The Highest Price For Your Home!

Mary St George

LICENSED ASSOCIATE REAL ESTATE BROKER

C: 315.719.8377

mstgeorge@Nothnagle.com Geneva Office 97 Seneca St Geneva, NY 14456

{ TIPS FOR WOMEN }

GET LONGER, THICKER, STRONGER, HEALTHIER HAIR by jean dulgosh

Monat is a revolutionary and innovative hair care line of naturally based products, pure, safe, non-toxic, cruelty-free, gluten free and vegan. These ingredients have been proven to mimic the body’s own natural oils to reduce hair thinning, prevent oxidative stress, and add volume and shine. They deliver incredible moisture, renew life to the hair and eliminate brittle texture. You’ll see thicker, longer, stronger, healthy & youthful-looking hair. The more you use MONAT, the more your hair benefits to sustain the beautiful appearance of healthy-looking hair by providing it with beneficial hydration, cleansing and moisture, nutrition for regrowth, plus UV protection to preserve hair’s radiance and help pause the signs of aging. There

is nothing else like Monat anywhere on the market today they are FIRST TO THE ANTI-AGING HAIR CARE MARKET! WE ARE THE FASTEST GROWING HAIR CARE COMPANY IN THE US AND CANADA!! The Monat products have been scientifically proven (and validated) to increase hair growth, replace hair loss, protect hair from environmental toxins, and maintain a youthful appearance. Bring back the healthy hair of your youth with their exclusive blend of MONAT’s proprietary blend of REJUVENIQE ™ Oil Intensive and active botanicals, clinically proven to boost hair growth and improve follicle strength luster and vitality.

and sustainable. But with other brands recognizing the power of botanical oils, how is MONAT any different? The answer lies in our rich formulations that make these naturally-based ingredients work in harmony with each other, combining and reacting to pump up their natural properties to take MONAT to the next level. Whether you want to get healthy hair or you are looking to start your own “work at home” business, give MONAT a try. www.jeanlisa.mymonat.com 585-230-6704

MONAT’s ingredients are naturally-based, safe, pure

“Monat: the 1st naturally based anti-aging hair care company! All of our products are chemical/toxin free. Monat helps regrow hair, smooths coarse hair, hydrates dry hair and makes hair shinny, fuller and thicker. And it’s made right here in the USA!” Please visit my website www.jeanlisa.mymonat.com Or call Jean Dlugosh 585-230-6704

{ Tuxedos pet corner }

“Training for you... Training for your dog”

Training Services Offered: • Private In Home Lessons • Puppy Socialization • Basic Obedience • Intermediate Obedience • Canine Good Citizen • Therapy Pets Unlimited and more...

Tuxedo’s: The boarding, day care and training facility where your dog is never alone!

ATTENTION ANIMAL and JEWELRY LOVERS You’re Invited to a Pawbrokers Party For

Verona Street Animal Society Foster Program Wednesday, August 23, 2017 5:00 - 9:00pm

Lovin’ Cup Bistro

300 Park Pointe Dr.

Rochester, NY 14623 Thousands of pieces of jewelry including:

Designer pieces-Current fashion trends- Gemstones

Gold - Silver - Pearls - Rhinestones - Onyx - Chunky - Delicate - Funky And so much more……..

100% of the proceeds will go to Verona Street Animal Society Foster Program Clean out your jewelry boxes of the jewelry you no longer wear

Bring it with you the day of the party – if you don’t have any, please come anyway See our website for future dates www.pawbrokers.org

We will be selling our signature Pawtinin and $1.00 of everyone sold will go to the rescue

{ tuxedos pet corner }

There are plants, shrubs and mulch that are harmful to your pet. If you are not sure which gardening materials are pet safe ask the local gardening professionals.

SPRING DIGGING... IN THE SUMMER

With the arrival of the summer months it is time to think about lawn and garden needs for the growing season ahead. As you make your plans for your outdoor space please keep your family pet in mind.

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Planning ahead with the proper information can make this a safe and happy summer for your entire family. When preparing your garden and yard here a few suggestions to save you frustration later. Refrain from allowing your canine companion seeing you dig in the yard or garden. Once your pet observes the behavior, it has given them permission to follow the same activity and behavior. There are several reasons why your dog may dig and here are a few of the most common. A.) Boredom and lack of activity. B.) The environment is not desirable (lacking toys and playmates). C.) Digging for burrowed animals or insects. D.) Seeking comfort in hot weather. E.) Seeking attention by digging in front of you. To address these concerns you will need to get to the root cause of the problem. When you allow your pet to roam and play outside alone the chances are boredom. Monitor their activity and if you observe scrapping on the ground with their front paws give the cue of â&#x20AC;&#x153;NO DIGâ&#x20AC;? and go outside and redirect the behavior by giving them some attention with a ball or walk the lawn. While it may appear that your dog is enjoying their time outside, dogs enjoy your company too. Include in the daily routine additional exercise and stimulation with playtime outside. Allow your companion to run and play with his toys outside. Some dogs have an excessive desire to dig and in this situation, create an area that is their safe digging zone. The area should be soft sand and/or top soil, if you see them beginning to dig in the yard, bring him to the area designated

as a dig zone and dig a hole. Encourage your pet to dig in the designated digging area. If he/she continues to dig in the forbidden areas place chicken wire one to two inches under the soil in the area that he had dug before. When placing the chicken wire under the soil fold the sharp edges under to avoid injury. Place large rocks into the ground around the buried wire, creating a boundary. If the digging continues, keep him inside and only allow him out during supervised and controlled visits. When correcting a behavior it must be corrected at the time of the activity. If it is after the fact it is too late and your pet does not understand what you are correcting him for. If you have a dog that enjoys digging, turn the activity into a game by burying dog treats in the digging zone. While placing the treats into the digging zone allow your dog to see you bury them in the sand. Once they see the activity they will begin to search for the instant reward of the dog treat in the sand. Once this activity begins, continue to restock the digging zone with new treats and toys. Regardless of what method you take to eliminate and stop the digging, the most important rule of thumb is not to punish your dog for the behavior. If digging continues despite your best efforts contact a professional to assist you with the challenge and address the root cause for the behavior. Digging is an undesirable behavior and if not corrected can lead to serious frustration for pet and owner alike. Mark Forrest Patrick is the owner and trainer at Tuxedoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s K9 Training Camp. Visit www.tuxedosk9.com for more details.

{ tuxedoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s pet corner }

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

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{ rochester minimalists }

Taking Back The Power of Choice by amy cavalier

M i n im a lism is a lifestyle takes that encourages us to take a closer look at the things we collect, the decisions we make, and how we spend our spare time.

The to-do lists seem endless. Change your wardrobe from spring to summer; get organized; walk the dog; water the garden; juggle work with family life and trying to squeeze in time for a workout, meditation or socializing. As women, we often feel there are never enough hours in a day. What if I told you there was a way to take control of your time, money and energy? In the past few years, I’ve been pursuing a more minimalist lifestyle. It started with a major purge of all my belongings – recycling, selling and throwing out thousands of items accumulated over years of time. As I cleared space in my home though, I found the benefits of living with less went much deeper. Minimalism has helped me determine the difference between a need and a want. It has helped me know when an opportunity is a full yes, a maybe or a no. Clearing space in my life has allowed me to function more efficiently and effectively and has made room for new energy and ideas. It’s allowed me to save money and helped me see I have the power to choose to live a lifestyle I 122

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can afford rather than trying to keep up with the Joneses.

So what exactly is it?

According to authors Ryan Nicodemus and Joshua Fields Millburn, also known as The Minimalists, “minimalism is a tool that can assist you in finding freedom. Freedom from fear. Freedom from worry. Freedom from overwhelm. Freedom from guilt. Freedom from depression. Freedom from the trappings of the consumer culture we’ve built our lives around. Real freedom.” Some might watch their recent film, “Minimalism: A Documentary About the Important Things,” and think that their lifestyle is unattainable or extreme, however, they emphasize the fact that “there is no minimalist rulebook.” “We’re all different,” they write in their blog

piece The Irony of Minimalism. “The things that add value to one man’s life may not add value to yours. So hold on to that hair straightener, those colorful socks, that collection of angel statuettes—but only if they are appropriate for your life. Only if they serve a purpose or bring you joy.”

Do you own your things, or do they own you?

There are, on average 300,000 items in the average American household according to the LA Times and yet still every 1 in 10 Americans rent storage space according to New York Magazine. In extreme cases, the inability to get rid of things can turn into compulsive hoarding, which studies show effects six percent of the population or 19 million Americans. We hold on for things for many reasons. There can be guilt associated with keeping items associated with certain people, places or memories. Maybe you’re on a budget and are not sure when you’ll be able to afford new things. Or perhaps you are a teacher or crafter who sees a potential future use in every discarded magazine, milk container or box of old macaroni.

So how do you get started?

• Set attainable goals to get started. Play the “30-Day Minimalism Game” and get rid of one thing on the first day of the month, two on the second day of the month, three on the third, on until the end of the month when you wind up shedding over 400 belongings. • Make some rules for

{ rochester minimalists } Set attainable goals to get started. Play the “30-Day Minimalism Game” and get rid of one thing on the first day of the month, two on the second day of the month, three on the third, on until the end of the month when you wind up shedding over 400 belongings.

yourself, like if you haven’t worn it in six months or used it in a year, you have to get rid of it. • Stick to the “in with the new, out with the old” adage. Whenever you buy something new, try to find two things you can get rid of. • Just because it’s for sale doesn’t mean you need it. Learn to decipher the difference between a “want” and a genuine “need.”

• When is the last time you did a pantry purge? Try to challenge yourself to not buying groceries for a week, or only purchasing absolute necessities, as you try to find creative ways to use up uneaten food before it expires.

Go beyond stuff

• Do your research before making purchase. Buy products with lifetime warranties or a good reputation for quality. • Don’t purchase items that only have one function. The average drill gets used as little as 30 minutes in its lifetime. Look for tool shares, join your local Buy Nothing or Freecycle community, or ask your friends family or neighbors you can borrow an item you only use once a year. • When it comes to clothes, before you buy, ask yourself important questions like does it actually fit or is it versatile to wear with more than one outfit? Will it have more than one purpose? How many times will it be used? Did you ever consider hosting a clothing swap among friends? • Eliminate duplication. How many coffee mugs do you actually need and how many will you actually use all at once? 124

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Clutter goes beyond physical objects and takes many forms in our lives. There’s digital clutter, bad habit clutter, aspirational clutter, work clutter, social clutter, time clutter and even financial clutter. In the book “Everything that Remains,” The Minimalists explain how choosing to live beyond their means left them feeling empty and unfulfilled.

“The stuff wasn’t doing its job; it wasn’t making me happy. Depression set in when I no longer had time for a life outside of work, laboring eighty hours a week just to pay for the stuff that wasn’t making me happy. I didn’t have time for anything I wanted to do: no time to write, no time to read, no time to relax, no time for my closest relationships. I didn’t even have time to have a cup of coffee with a friend, to listen to his stories. I realized that I didn’t control my time, and thus I didn’t control my own life. It was a shocking realization.” One of the most eye-opening things about minimalism for me is recognizing how the choices I make today have a ripple effect on my future. For example, for six years, I spent my New Year’s Eve in New York City. It required a lot of planning, which at times was stressful, and often left me drained physically and financially. This year, I decided to go with a less expensive, less hectic New Year’s Eve plan. And boy did it pay off! I was able to hit the ground running on January 1st feeling caught up at home and at work, and as of June 2017, I accomplished the feat of being debt free besides my mortgage. Minimalism means different things to everyone. Once you make space in your home, you

might find your attention drawn to other areas of your life where you can simplify. Perhaps this means organizing and cleaning out your email folder, or purging your friends list on Facebook. Perhaps it means limiting the amount of time you spend on social media or watching Netflix. The next time you decide you need to reorganize your closet or clean out your basement, flex your minimalist muscle and allow it to help you take back your time, your space and your power!

How to learn more:

Join the Rochester Minimalists Meet-ups at some of their upcoming meetings to learn more, seek support and make connections with other minimalists! Visit the Rochester Minimalists on Facebook (www.facebook.

com/groups/rochesterminimalists/) or Meet-up (www.meetup.com/Minimalismorg-Rochester/) for more information. A Discussion About Minimalism Wednesday, July 26 from 7:00 - 9:00 p.m. Hawthorne Lodge, Genesee Valley Park, 1000 E. River Rd., Rochester, NY 14623 Bring chairs, bug spray, weather appropriate clothing and a snack/dish to share! Tour of Green Visions Wednesday, August 23 from 5:30 - 7:30 p.m. 797 Smith Street, Rochester, NY Join us for a tour of a workforce development and phytoremediation program in the cityâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s JOSANA neighborhood.

Downsizing Mom and Dad Monday, September 18 from 7:00 - 9:00 p.m. Legacy at Clover Blossom, 100 McAuley Drive, Rochester Join Dawn Provan of New Dawnings, Diane Zielinski of Gentle Decluttering, and Janet Olexy as they discuss process of downsizing, estate sales and tips on how to get rid of your parents things without throwing them in the trash.

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{ hOME WITH GINI }

Single women…

Are they more likely or less to buy their own home? by GINI DENNINGER

Single women…are they more likely or less to buy their own home? A few years ago you would not be wrong to say less likely. Today you would be very wrong! According to the National Association of Realtors, statistics show women are entering the market in larger numbers than men and have been for some years now. The message that real estate builds wealth is hitting home! 23% of first time home buyers are women compared to 15% men. Today more women than men live alone and are more likely to own their own homes! Female buyers are usually 32 years old when they close on their first home. Women have definitely become an economic force and this promises to continue into the future. Single women comprise of the second largest group of buyers after married couples! So why is this?

savings begin, even if the mortgage is higher than the rent. (https://www.nar.realtor/field-guides/ field-guide-to-buying-vs-renting). The days of believing in a prince that will provide the castle, are firmly gone. Statistically, women are marrying later in life and more opt to not have children. Many of these women fully intend to have a partner in life, but are not waiting for that to happen before buying their home. In-fact, many women consider the idea that someone may be sharing their home at some point in the future and make sure to have room to accommodate that person, such as enough closet space or “his & her” sinks in a bathroom. They are getting on with their lives but with hope that they will not be alone for ever.

More women have buying power now than ever before. They appreciate that home ownership offers them stability and gone are the days when women preferred to postpone until marriage. Another category of women buying their own homes besides the younger generation are women who have become newly single, whether due to death of a spouse or divorce. They often downsize or look for housing that comes with less maintenance. Between 51-69, 10% more women than men are buying homes. Besides buying power, women want more control over their lives in general and this translates into where they live. By owning their own home they are in control. There is never the possibility that a landlord can raise the rent to an uncomfortable level, ask them to move, or that are are at the mercy of a bad housing provider who either; never makes repairs, is late or does so insufficiently. Home owners are not beholden to another persons rules for their living space, such as having a garden or pets. Women understand owning a home means you call the shots! The economic benefits are large too. Besides tax advantages, consider the savings that accrue through the years by paying a mortgage rather than rent. After tax savings are the start, but with nonadjustable mortgages, buyers always know what they will be paying for shelter, aside from taxes of course. Online there are many financial tables showing examples where the 126

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them to buy a comfortably affordable property. Many buyers are referred to trusted mortgage officers through their real estate agent. Agents making referrals have had positive experiences with these loan officers. Do you know that 90% of women buyers use a real estate agent? And that it’s not unusual they become friends through the transaction since buying a home is an intimate and emotional process for many. While this is so, it’s important that when the decision to buy is made, the buyer seek out the right person to help them achieve their home ownership goals. This person has to be able to understand and listen to what their buyer is seeking, yet also, they have to help the buyer be realistic with what they are expecting in their price bracket. This can be a tough sell sometimes! Working with a Realtor means the buyer is protected by an expert who is looking out for them, not the seller. They should be up to date with the complex and constantly evolving real estate laws. Their Realtor shall sett up search engines that communicate listing changes such as new listings, price drops or sales of homes. These searches are sent to the buyers mailbox at least once a day or as such changes occur. While looking for a home, excellent Realtors keep an eye out for issues that could prevent their buyer from selling easily at a later date, such as too much traffic out front, a train trestle in the back,, even a steep sloping driveway could be an issue especially here in the snow belt. While not structural specialists, most will alert buyers if they think there is an issue and suggest, if the buyer persists, that they have a structural engineer conduct any integrity inspections necessary.

When considering homeownership, buyers - both women and men should understand what they can comfortably afford. Working with a mortgage officer they are comfortable with will allow them to do so. Together, the buyer and loan officer look at all potential home ownership costs. Besides the mortgage, buyers have to consider other expenses such as property taxes, insurance, maintenance and the dreaded “emergency” expenditures like a new furnace or hot water tank. A quality loan officer won’t push a buyer to buy at the top of their affordability range, but rather encourages

Once a home is found the Realtor should create a comparative market analysis, to ensure their buyer is not paying too much for the property. Additionally the Realtor will expertly write a contract that is attractive to the seller and still makes sense for the buyer. Getting to the closing table is complicated but good Realtors are there all the way through, helping their client feel comfortable with and to navigate successfully, through the process. It is never too early to consider, and prepare for, home buying. It makes sense for today’s woman!

I think outside the box and come up with unique ways to get your home seen! And they sell quickly! I am exactly what you are looking for in an agent and am here to help you every step of the journey. My name is Gini Denninger and I would love to sell you your next home.

GOODMAN REALTY I GINI DENNINGER I ginidrealestate@gmail.com I 585-760-3880

{ you can be...! }

health & fitness by mary therese friel

Welcome to my column… You Can Be…! This installment is dedicated to you, being the best that you can be! A daily program that includes a proper diet and a good exercise routine is important. It will help you look and feel great, mentally and physically. Before beginning your program, do your homework. Read books, consult the experts, and maybe even join a support group. Please be sure to always consult a physician before going on any diet or starting any exercise program. Start by choosing a realistic diet program and selecting an exercise regime that you like and one that will fit into your schedule. Avoid quick fixes, such as diet pills, diuretics or other drugs, as well as fad diets. Losing weight and getting in shape takes time, patience and dedication. Not only will you want to “take it off”, BUT, you’ll want to learn how to “keep it off.” It will take discipline, determination and commitment. Believe you can do it and you will! Set realistic goals for yourself. Stick to your program and you WILL see results.

Eating responsibly means eating foods that are good for you. It means moderation and discipline. Eat 3 well-balanced meals a day, incorporating each of the five food groups. Stay away from fatty foods, foods high in cholesterol, overly salted foods or sugar loaded treats. For starters, check the nutrition labels on the foods that you eat to find out just how good they are for you. You should eat real foods that you need to feed your body and give you energy. Avoid junk foods. Monitor your calorie intake. Did you know it takes 3500 calories to make a pound? Putting on the poundage is easy, but did you ever figure out how much work you have to do to get rid of it? Think ahead and you may have second thoughts reaching for seconds, or snacking on empty calories (junk foods). If you wish to maintain a consistent weight, find out how many calories you can consume to maintain a balance. Balance the calories you take in with the calories you expend. If you wish to lose weight, eat less and exercise more and if you wish to gain weight, eat more and exercise less. Be smart - eat smart and exercise wisely.

Some good diet tips include eating: • Whole grain breads in place of white   • Low fat or no-fat foods   • Low salt or salt-free foods   • Non-sugar additive foods   • Low calorie foods • Seafood or chicken in place of red meat   • Fruits and vegetables as snacks in  place of junk food   Did you know it takes 20 minutes from when you put food into your mouth and it hits your stomach, to feel the satisfaction? So if you eat slowly, you will begin to feel fuller and take in less food (calories). It is best to never rush through a meal. Often when we do this, we just keep cramming in the calories and then may even experience an upset stomach, as it takes that extra time to catch up with us. Stop eating even before you feel full. Take a good multivitamin each day. You may choose to take additional vitamin supplements but don’t go crazy. Some vitamins are not water-soluble and could build up in your system. Never use vitamins in place of food. They are designed to supplement your diet and they actually require food to be assimilated

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{ you can be... } Be good to your body and it will be good to you! Be sure to get enough rest and relaxation to allow your body time to rejuvenate. And never underestimate the importance of a positive attitude, on your mind, body and spirit. You’ll feel better, perform better, and look your best!

Water is essential to any healthy regiment. Drinking 8-10 glasses of water a day is important. Drinking a lot of water will fill you up and you’ll be less hungry, thus you’ll eat less. Water helps to flush away impurities and gets rid of old stored deposits. Also, water aids cell functions, metabolism and gives your skin elasticity. Most of all, it’s important to keep your body replenished with plenty of water to avoid becoming dehydrated. P r o p e r e xe r c i s i n g will improve circulation, increase endurance, strengthen your body and sharpen your mind too. Establish a regular routine that works for you. For example, you may choose to work out for 1/2 hour in the mornings before going to school or to work. At school you could choose to participate in gym class or in sports after school. At work you could walk the stairs, stretch or do chair bound office exercises. If you are at home, you could turn your living room, bedroom or basement into a “mini gym.” After work you could go to a gym, a 130

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health club, or higher a personal trainer to come to you. Your work out can be a light or heavy one. You can do meditation exercises, floor exercises, yoga, aerobics, or even weight lifting. It’s a

busy life-style, especially if you’ve never done it before. You have to believe that exercise is the most important thing you can do for yourself each day. You need to set reasonable goals for yourself to avoid becoming discouraged, and don’t expect to see immediate changes. If you get into the habit of regular exercise and are careful about your diet, you will see results. Yo u’ l l b e h e a l t h i e r, s t r o n g e r, a n d m o re flexible. Your energy level will increase, and you’ll feel better about yourself, inside and out. In a world as busy as ours, it’s not surprising that many of us suffer from stress. Learn how to handle stress. Don’t let stress take control of you, take control of your stress.

good idea to consult with a qualified fitness trainer for proper exercise instruction. You can also read books, clip articles, rent videos or attend classes to aid you. Exercise can be a difficult thing to fit into a

Be good to your body and it will be good to you! Be sure to get enough rest and relaxation to allow your body time to rejuvenate. And never underestimate the importance of a positive attitude, on your mind, body and spirit. You’ll feel better, perform better, and look your best!

Greed.

{ flower city bitties DIY }

INTRODUCING

THE FLOWER CITY BITTIES by lauren harrison

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Someone once told me that the human brain is only capable of handling so much input and stimulation before it becomes overwhelmed. The modern woman is inundated day in and day out with enormous expectations to perform in some capacity, whether that is at a job, at home, working from home, etc. Without an outlet, these burdens can become overwhelming.

and pick 1-2 crafts to work on over glasses of wine and tasty snacks. We had many successesour houses are testaments to those success. We also had many Pinterest ‘flops’ and our families houses are testaments to those, as they most likely inherited our handmade beauties that weren’t lucky enough to find a forever home on our own mantles.

So what is the hardworking woman in this fast paced society supposed to do to find balance!? Craft. In my mother’s words, ‘stitch n bitch’ , but we will keep this PC for now...Roughly five years ago my girlfriends and I started holding regular Pinterest days, once every six weeks or so. We would chat and browse our Pinterest pages

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Honestly, crafting can be stress and anxietyinducing even for us. How do you take a picture from Pinterest, oftentimes without directions or supply lists, and turn that into a real product? But at every step in our crafting journey, whether

it is on our own studios or in a class we are leading, the end products are always amazing. I don’t mean amazing like “Hey, I can sell this cool craft I just made because it is that good !”. The products are amazing because our valuable time was spent on creating them. The products are amazing because they are made in the company of friends (and many times wine...wine is a friend, let’s be real). The products are amazing because they have been created in conjunction with a “team” of people who have uplifted and supported you during the crafting journey. Sure, sometimes the peacock feathers I am painting have crooked strokes.

The foundation of Flower City Bitties is simple and strong. We wholeheartedly believe that using creativity, in any form, is an outlet to relax and unwind. Honestly, crafting can be stress and anxiety-inducing even for us. you during the crafting journey. Sure, sometimes the peacock feathers I am painting have crooked strokes. Yes, my monogram wooden “H” adorned with garden stones has chipped and doesn’t fit any of the colors of my house. But there has not been a person yet (as far as we know) who has taken our classes that leaves feeling defeated and embarrassed by the product they created. Those feelings of anxiety and stress dissipate with each step, with each

guided tutorial. Feelings of accomplishment are often overwhelming at the close of an FCB event; the laughs and relaxed atmosphere aren’t too bad, either. This is what we strive for. This is what makes working multiple jobs, with small children, worth every second. This is what makes hours of my time scrolling through internet pages and walking through Michaels and JoAnn’s enjoyable and

exhilarating. The ability to give people an outlet for their creativity. The ability to give the less artistically inclined customers a fun and positive experience makes running FCB the most fulfilling thing I have done in a very long time.

Lauren Harrison Co-Founder/Partner

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C { unraveled } BY SHEILA KENNEDY

Competition is an ugly word!

Growing up I was competitive. I wanted to win. Whether it was sports or an oratory contest (yes, even as early as middle school, I was a public speaker!), I wanted the top prize. That really didn’t change much as I entered adulthood. I still wanted to be on top. Yep – I clearly had some self-esteem issues.

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As I have matured and interacted with other people, I see that competition is really a state of mind for an individual. When I was doing research, and writing my book, Choices to Changes, I learned so much about how that competitive mindset is such a detriment to me, my business and my interaction with others. That competitive spirit was hampering building good relationships with people that could be collaborators instead.

do more and be more is gone. There are frequently more clients and more work than I could ever imagine. Why? Because I get to focus on building relationships with people instead of immersing myself in an energy that only serves my good and not anyone else’s. The spirit of abundance only gets amplified and I have been able to partner with “competing” publishers instead of figuring out how I can lure their clients away.

The thing about competition is that it creates a scarcity mindset. Competitive people are steeped in lack. The belief is that there is not enough to go around, so you fight to get more. Now don’t get me wrong, excellence in your field or industry is different than competition. The opposite of competition is not indifference. It is collaboration. When two or more parties work together there is more benefit for more people. That is a spirit of abundance.

This was a practice that I clearly adopted last week during a live event that I hosted celebrating authors and their audiences. I had two other publishing companies as co-sponsors to the event. Anna Weber of Successfully Published and Kristin Paul of Purple Ribbon Publishing have been amazing collaborators and I learn so much from them both. I couldn’t imagine why I would ever think to compete with them rather than collaborate. The collective mind is so powerful and together we create stronger and better offerings. When we share what we have been blessed with, it amplifies the abundance for all of us. I can’t even imagine what it would be like to look at them as competitors, even though by society’s standards today, they are.

Every person gets to decide what they want to attract. Lack invites more lack. Remember that when you are scheming how to get to the front of the line. If you achieve success, most often it is momentary. It is hard to maintain top performance in a spirit of scarcity. That is why athletes and any top producer can only last on top for so long. They operate in a spirit of lack and that is hard to thrive in for extend periods of time. When I reorganized my business to add publishing and marketing to the menu of services, there was one gentlemen that thought it was a horrible idea. He said that I could never compete with the great names of the industry and that it would be futile trying. I promptly responded that I don’t compete with anyone. First, there is more than enough business for everyone. I couldn’t, nor could anyone else, serve all the people that there are to serve.

There is more work than any of us could handle. Secondly, we all bring something different to the table. Why would I worry about serving people that I wasn’t meant to serve? That is where confidence comes in. I trust that I will be connected to the people that I am meant to connect with. I have not once looked at someone else in the industry as a competitor. We all have something special to offer and it won’t be a fit for everyone.

Removing the spirit of competition has changed my life. The constant striving to

I am issuing you a challenge this month. In the spirit of collaboration, look at the people in your life that you may view as competition. Those people are not relegated to the business world either. They can be people that you are in relationships with for varied reasons. How many of your personal relationships are impacted because you want to be the favorite daughter or sibling? Are there power dynamics in your friend groups, that is perpetuated by an underlying spirit of lack? Make a list of those people or relationships and brainstorm one idea that you could employ to shift that relationship from one of competition to one of sharing and collaboration. Don’t tackle them all at once – pick one and work on it until you feel you have made progress. Then move on to the next one. Unraveling the spirit of competition, and the mindset that feeds it, has been a game changer for me. Sharing resources and abundance has far better served me than hording it all for myself. My only regret is that it took me so long to realize, but better late than never. Good luck – it is a tough shift for many people. Make it a priority and watch how much better your life and ultimately your success becomes.

{ SHIFT+CONTROL }

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{ young womens college prep }

Connecting Classroom Lessons with the Real World by LAURIe BONNELL

Sometimes it is helpful to go outside of the classroom to find inspiration for a class assignment. When that assignment is to create a fashion design – where better to find inspiration than at a fashion exhibit?

While at the exhibit, which featured 40 ensembles, each girl picked out an outfit that inspired her. For student Havana Preston, that was an evening dress made out of a shower curtain with beading on the back in the shape of a showerhead.

Last spring, Tess Hanna’s 9th-grade art students visited the Memorial Art Gallery to view the Inspiring Beauty: 50 Years of Ebony Fashion Fair exhibit. The exhibit presented the history of the Ebony Fashion Fair, a traveling fashion show that employed African-American designers, models, seamstresses and stylists. From its start in 1958, the show overcame racial prejudice to elevate the status and image of African Americans in the fashion world.

“There were a lot of creative fashions on display,” Havana said.

“I wanted the girls to have a chance to view the exhibit in person. We talked about the Fair’s history. And we used the field trip to get inspiration for our next art project,” Ms. Hanna said.

The exhibit featured an array of outfits, from fun (a black dress embellished with a woman’s eyes and lips made from plastic buttons) to fabulous (sparkling evening gowns, ruffled ball gowns, and coats trimmed with feathers and fur). After the field trip, Ms. Hanna set the students to work creating their own fashions. She borrowed a trick from the TV show Project Runway to make the assignment a little more interesting: each outfit had to include a recycled material. The girls worked in small groups over six weeks to complete their outfits. Havana and her group made a skirt and tank

top that could be worn for a day at the beach. The shoulder straps and trim on the top were made of plastic recycled from a floating pool toy. “It took much longer than I thought to get it all done,” Havana said. “When I was sketching it I thought it looked really neat and perfect. But the real thing wasn’t perfect.” That said, Havana thought the field trip and the assignment were “really fun.” And Ms. Hanna was pleased with the class’ work. “I thought a lot of the girls were very successful in what they were able to do,” Ms. Hanna said. The girls modeled their fashions for each other after the projects were complete. Havana enjoyed seeing the designs her classmates came up with, especially a black and white purse one group made out of cardboard. “I learned that everyone’s art can be unique and different,” Havana said. “Everyone has their own style.”

{ mind, body, spirit }

Hydrate. Hydrate. Hydrate. by alANA CALHOON

It’s a hot sunny day. You’re thirsty. For anything. A diet coke. An orange juice. Bottled water. Anything liquid. Bring it on! But why? Why are you so darned thirsty when it’s hot out? Perspiration. When we sweat, we lose our body’s natural water. If we aren’t properly hydrated, we become dehydrated. And that can be dangerous. Here’s what you can do. First. Don’t get to the point of being thirsty. What???? That means, drink water periodically throughout the day. If you plan to be in the sun, drink even more. Second. Pack a water bottle. This is the ‘how’ of drinking more water. Have it with you! Third. Pay attention to your body. Some of the symptoms of dehydration are: • headache • dry skin • tiredness • dizziness • rapid pulse • extreme thirst • parched mouth • dark yellow urine • irritability If you experience several of these symptoms after a day in the sun, contact your health care specialist. Four. Love & nurture your self! When we take care of ourselves, we notice when something’s not right and look into it. Five. Stay covered. Use an umbrella, a wide brimmed hat, and sunscreen to prevent overheat, dehydration, and/or sunburn. Six. Have fun! Summer time is often the most active time of the 138

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year. Make it the best and enjoy every minute. Meet Dr Annette Sessions, MD Urologist, Surgeon, Acupuncturist Water, Wine & More It’s a lovely summer evening and I’m having a glass of wine with a glass of water. Why? Because I always do! But why did I start? For two reasons. 1.) Alcohol dehydrates you and 2.) At 5’2” it’s best to moderate one’s alcohol intake. So by drinking water alongside my wine, I drink more slowly, and am less apt to get dehydrated. Win - win!

Ah! Here comes my friend, Dr Annette Sessions. We met during a yoga class years ago. I’ve asked her to join me for glass of wine, and to offer her advise on water consumption. It’s clear that we need to up the water intake during the summer season, but what about the remaining 273 days of the year? “I tell all of my patients that your body is made up of two thirds water. If you like to function at your best, then you need to give your body its elemental needs. And that’s water.” Dr. Sessions uses this formula when calculating how much water to drink daily: roughly half of your bodyweight. Ie. If you weigh 150 pounds, drink a minimum of 75 ounces of water. Her patients are often surprised by that number and try to substitute with flavored beverages, but what your body needs is pure, clear water. “We look for flavor, carbonation, anything to make it more scintillating. But, really, it’s a lot easier and healthier just to stick with water.” She shares a story about the days when she lived in Paris. Maybe it’s the fact that we’re sitting in a lovely restaurant drinking french wine. Maybe it’s the topic of water. Or maybe it’s a memory of a pleasant summer evening. “The only time you saw someone walking around while drinking a beverage in Paris, was when they were drinking water.” This is a stark comparison to the coffee we carry in paper cups to and fro, or the big gulp we seem to believe we need to consume because … it’s a better deal? The ad says so? It tastes sugary

BY ALANA CAHOON

{ mind, body & spirit } When working with my clients who are looking to shed a few pounds, I always advise beginning and ending their day with a glass of water. It fills you up and cleans out your system.

She continues, “Separating eating and drinking from any other activity is practiced in France. They eat three meals a day, and offer these meals their full attention.” I’m intrigued by this. In my world of holistic health, this is called Mindful Eating. And drinking is part of that equation. When working with my clients who are looking to shed a few pounds, I always advise beginning and ending their day with a glass of water. It fills you up and cleans out your system. Drinking a full glass of water prior to meals is key to preventing one from overeating, as well. You’re already filling your self up with a calorie free beverage. How cool is that?! Dr Sessions adds that as a urologist, her primary goal is to teach her patients how to prevent kidney stone formation and urinary tract infections. It’s a simple as one word. Water.

Benefits of drinking water:

• Increases energy • Reduces signs of aging • Prevents kidney stone formation • Prevents urinary tract infections • Prevents dehydration • Decreases appetite I personally started a practice of drinking water throughout the day when I was in Jr High School. I made a point of stopping at every water fountain I passed for a drink of 140

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water. Today, I have a glass of water by my side throughout the day. One of the areas I’ve found hydration to be important is your complexion and your skin. Think about it. When we shower, we use water to cleanse and remove debris. It’s the same internally. Water purifies your system.

And the word “hydration” is synonymous with nearly all cosmetic advertisements. Here are just a few of the ads floating around: Discover Hydration-Infused Makeup for a Refreshed, Flawless Look! TOTAL HYDRATION. Resolves dryness and stickiness. For resilient skin with less visible pores. Full of the moisture and ingredients that skin needs. Our Oasis Collection features sea grass and water lily extracts which provides continuous hydration and helps improve skin’s water retention. Dr Sessions adds, “One of the first things I check is a patient’s skin. Dryness and tenting show the need for hydration.” She adds, “If you want more energy, drink more water! You’d be surprised what a transformation it is. You feel better. You look better. It’s inexpensive and accessible to everyone.” Thanks, Dr Sessions. See you on the yoga mat. Along with my water bottle ~ Alana Cahoon is the Founder of Grow 2 B U, providing a holistic approach to transition, leadership & entrepreneurship though creative coaching & meditation. To learn more about her Program, Getting the Body I Want!, visit www. Grow2BU.com.

The Best You...Believe it, Achieve it!

Enjoy A SPA DAY

at the Best You Spa! Enjoy 10% OFF any Body Wraps, Facials or Waxing.

847 Ridge Road I Webster, NY 14580 I 585- 298-6618 I www.cmbthebestyou.com

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{ the best you }

by CHRISTINE BUFF I PHOTO BY SANDY ARENA

I’m very excited to introduce myself. My name is Christine Buff, LE, CPLC. I am a Licensed Esthetician and Certified Professional Life Coach. An Esthetician is a Skincare Therapist who specializes in the well being of your skin. A Life Coach is a professional who helps another individual to overcome obstacles in their life by awareness of their “own personal tools and skills” that they internally possess in order to help them solve life’s obstacles at that moment as well as any future ones that may arise. In addition to my credentials, I am the owner of The Best You Spa on Ridge Road in Webster, NY. As a licensed Esthetician, I have the wonderful opportunity to treat the an individual on a holistic level. This means I care about your whole wellness from the inside out or the outside in, whichever of the individual’s needs are to be met, and for the individual’s purpose to meet with me. I trained to become an Esthetician and Life Coach because I value the individual as a whole and to provide treatment not just for part of you, rather you as a whole.

What and Who is The Best You?

Well you are, I am, your family, friends, and neighbors are too. I am the one who wants to bring out your Best You!

Each and everyone of us are made uniquely like a snowflake, or fingerprint soft and gentle. If we don’t take care of ourselves, the exterior of ourselves can become rough and damaged which affects our interior well being. When that happens, chances are it can ruin our perception of ourselves as well as our self image. By providing you with a specifically designed and healthy skincare service, I can help bring around the most positive results in order to achieve The Best You. My continuous education and research, allows me to provide you with the most up to date and beneficial services to all who seek the Best for themselves. There is often a lot of misinformation and less healthy products out there. Dedicating myself to continued education and staying up on the latest research allow me to provide you with the best and most correct information and services. I am dedicated and excited to teach you about your Skincare Wellness. Did you know that in years past that going to a spa was considered just a luxury? It was enjoyed by Kings, Queens and the well off alike. Well, all that has changed. Due to the importance of obtaining and maintaining a healthy body, skin care spa services are now are available to everyone. All of our skincare services are suited for and great for, Men and Women, from teenagers on up. Our environment has changed, our stress levels have increased as life is busier for us, even the food and water we consume can all affect our skin wellness. It’s the same effect as working out or getting your hair done. Our skin needs to be maintained every two to four weeks in order to see wonderful positive and healthy changes. In addition to your skincare services received at the spa, an effective and healthy home regimen should be followed. I will help you design the best way and products to accomplish this. Some recommendations may included sunscreen, a 30SPF is recommended as a minimum year round,

yes year round even in the winter and even when cloudy conditions are present. Face, hands, chest should be included in the application. When you arrive at The Best You Spa for your skincare treatment, you will experience a welcoming atmosphere. We will then move upstairs where I will provide you with an incredible relaxing and pampered skincare treatment. I will also educated you about your skin, skin care products and your journey to healthy, glowing skin. Most people are not aware of their own skin type which leads them to utilizing less helpful and possible harmful products. I will help you overcome this problem by educating you on the skin type you have in order to ensure you receive the Best care, as well as the most informed information for your home care regimens. We only use high quality products with the best ingredients such as Peptides, Amino Acids, Retinol and Collagen that only professionals are allowed and able to purchase to meet all of your skincare needs. We offer many services to provide the best treatment your skin will need, from Nourishing Facials such as Anti-aging, skin with Acne, etc. We offer our specialty Facial called Le Magnifique which utilizes the Best products and FDA equipment to meet your anti-aging needs. This service is our most asked for facial we offer. Luscious Lash Lifting is another service we offer. Lash Lifting utilizes your own natural lashes to lift them in order to enhance the beauty of your lashes and eyes. Our Beneficial Body Treatments offer a way to detoxify, exfoliate, tighten skin and break up fat cells( Lipo Laser procedure) without any down time or harsh side affects. Aromatherapy is another way to regroup, relax, and revitalize you as well as diminish the cares of the world. We use the Best essential oils to provide the best possible experience for you. We invite you to visit our website at www. cmbthebestyou.com to see all our services we offer or book your appointment. We invite everyone to come see us in person as we would love to answer any questions that you may have as well as meet your lovely self in person. Our goal is to give you the Best care and service that You deserve. Our continuous ongoing education and research keeps us current on the latest services and products to give you the highest quality of wellness you deserve. First time clients receive 10% off your first visit. Client referral incentives are also recognized and given. We hope you will have the Best experience with your visit. Let’s start your journey to your Best skincare wellness and allow me to help you be The Best You!!

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

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image is our inspiration ÂŠ antonio barbagallo

three fashion forward boutiques at brighton commons

1855 monroe avenue | 585.473.6353 | www.panacheconsignboutique.com

ADD SOME EXCITEMENT TO YOUR WATER THIS SUMMER! FACT: The average woman applies over 300 chemicals a day to her body just through soaps, makeup, shampoos and hair care products. 80 of those are applied every day before breakfast. What to learn more about getting those numbers down, get the yuck out, live more chemical free TODAY. See why 80% of women choose Young Living Essential Oils in just 30 minutes to start living chemical free. Click here to learn more http:// lyoilsroc.marketingscents.com This month only 10% SAVINGS on your finalized enrollment and a complimentary personal body scan to see just what your body needs!

{ living above the line }

I’m good…No thank you… Mom, are you ok? by debbie mcq

Time, it can go so fast and we always want more of it. But, how does it get away from us so fast? Up until this month, I feel like I try very hard to be in the moment. Recognize and realize the good the bad and the ugly life throws at us - certainly hoping to always have mostly good. I enjoy watching the expressions on my childrens faces, quiet moments with my husband Mark, conversations with my friends, gatherings with family and more. I challenge myself to take a moment and stop to just watch and listen. Time can go so fast and while I know we can’t stop it, I feel like I am a bit ahead of the game if I at least realize it is passing. It is with this frame of mind that I approached an amazing trip I had this month. On June 14th, I traveled with my mother (my best friend) to Salt Lake City Utah! Yes, we went west! It was our second time traveling to SLC and we felt like pro’s. Confident knowing what to expect, we were looking forward to the week but also helping our friends know what to expect. The reason? It was the Young Living

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International Grand CONVENTION! We were returning with so much enthusiasm. Over the last year we had worked so hard in helping and serving others - we both saw it as a celebration of our passion and commitment. We planned out our schedule, had strategies for the quick food breaks, look forward to the mentors we would be meeting with, of course crazy excited for all the goodies, and of course the closing night concert with CARRIE UNDERWOOD!!!! It was sure to be a trip to remember and absolutely did not fall short, kind of.

The Farm

Our first day was such a long day! We were on our first flight from Buffalo by 640AM - had a layover in Las Vegas then a quick hop to SLC by 1PM their time - or 3PM our time. We napped a bit on the first flight, had a snack in Las Vegas and hit the ground running as soon as we landed in SLC. After checking into our hotel and heading over to registration we headed out. 2017 was the largest attendance to the Young Living Convention ever - 30,000 oilers

all coming to SLC for 4 days for phenomenal event. The new part - taking the enormous group sessions to the the stadium of the SLC University Utes. Around 4:30PM we headed over to the shuttle buses that would take us to the stadium for the biggest tailgating party ever. I remember as we were riding over, we wondered what would the opening night festivities include. Well, the included a lot we did not plan for HOT HOT TEMPS, walking, and more HOT TEMPS. Long story short - we made it to the stadium and headed in for a something to eat and drink. We bought a snack and I scooted to get our bottles of water filled - trying to save a few bucks (more like $4 per bottle). Upon my return, I look over to my mom where she was leaning against the brick wall. I could see she was NOT OK. As I had about 100 times that day, I asked her if she is ok? She had a very blank look on her face and she mumbled NO. As I walked closer and I saw her hands beginning to shake, her head tilted to the right

and her eyes rolled back. I caught her and ease her down to the ground, SCREAMING to call 911. In my heart - I knew she was having a stroke. She had no strength in her body and was leading on me. Amazing people came and went into quick action. Calling 911, fellow oilers that were nurses appeared, and after what felt like a life time - she began to lift her head. I recall my friend Sue kneeling beside me and looking at her saying ‘This CANNOT happen’. As I watched my mom - I saw her eyes opened wider than I have ever seen, confused and unaware. I was so scared. I knew what I was seeing and had no idea what to do other than get her oils and help. I had my other friend call Kathy Kouwe, my mentor, my friend, the best oiler I have ever met and ask what to do for my mom.Kathy directed me to get frankincense, valor and peppermint on her chest and feet and to get Ningxia Red in her immediately. Tracey ran to a stand where Young Living was offering Ningxia Red, shared with them what was going on and they GAVE her a bunch of packets. By this time, this nurse, this God send began engaging my mom. Asking her questions, letting her gain awareness as I rubbed oils all over her chest. Medics began to arrive and we got her to the First Aid Room and air conditioning. They were having her talk, smile, answer questions, and with each question I knew what they were looking for. I wanted to answer for her just to prove she was ok. She was sucking down the Ningxia Red and quickly began coming back around. Her color, her confidence, her strength, her feisty attitude - I was never so happy to see that! It was the longest 30 minutes of my life. After talking a lot with this amazing medical staff, they explained based on their evaluation

and the tests they gave her that she severely dehydrated and suffered from too much heat. Minute by minute she gained more strength and we were eventually allow to head back to the hotel - deeming it was not a stroke. As we heading back, I watched her. I even watched her at night, as she slept I poked her all night to make sure she was ok and the next morning she woke up so full of life - and starving. She ate like a horse and over the next days, she oiled 3 times a day with the blend, and downed Ningxia Red constantly. By the time we left to come home she was so strong, stronger than ever before. While this was the most scariest moment I can ever recall, it was a blessing. Throughout the week - we learned so much and thru the grace of God, so many of the workshops we attended spoke to health that often tied to heart, mind, and aging health. All the info that we learned validated how imperative it is to take care of yourself, yes hydrate, but do so w/the gifts god gives us. Her and my father will always have their Ningxia Red and blends. Before, they liked it but didn’t notice or get concerned if they missed it a day or 2 or 3! As we parted after arriving back to Buffalo I was the most confident that how we reacted and treated her was perfect. It was a blessing this horrific thing happened, as now we are all wiser and healthier. Ningxia Red does so much for us - heart health, mental clarity, antioxidant, supports all our body systems. The medics took samples as they never have seen such a shift in a person as they did with my mother. Do not underestimate the value of taking care of

your health now - vs paying for it later - emotionally, physically and yes financially What started with a plan, we knew minute by minute what we wanted to do over this week. We strategized and wanted to get the most in with the time we had. Our downfall, not taking care of ourselves. On our first day of travel, I think I must have asked her - all good? You Ok? And each time, she responded with a very very confident yes. Only, as I reflect I think my questions were more about us traveling, not how we physically felt. You see my mom takes good care of herself, but hates hates airplane bathrooms. She did not drink at all.One small cup of cranberry juice on the first flight. After we arrived, I think maybe one bottle of water. ALL DAY! Add that to the heat, the elevation change and the excitement we should not be surprised. The time just went so fast. We were so focused on getting there, we missed our bodies and ourselves. We felt and still feel strong and resilient and totally underestimated what one day of not paying attention to our bodies could result in. Please please, get oils and Ningxia Red in your lives! My mother does not take meds, she is healthy. But that doesn’t mean she or anyone can just handle anything. Staying hydrated, eating right, resting and yes, putting the right stuff on and in your body is imperative. I do not wish this lesson on anyone - and hope you all learn from our experience. There are so many ways to make sure you have the oils you need and to enjoy Ningxia Red. Do not pass up this lesson. You are reading this for a reason - it is not a mistake! Start somewhere - lessen your stress, sleep better, help your heart, build your immune system while you clean you home! Anywhere! Today is your day - what is your choice. We choose health!

S Dear Sarah,

I noticed that I have an easier time connecting with men due to the experience of growing up with three brothers, male cousins, and being an athlete. Can you tell me more about how I can connect to my feminine side and bring in more female friends and build a likeminded sisterhood community? I have a hard time relating with women and most of my friendships are with guys. I find that women can be nasty, always criticizing and talking about each other. I find it easier to be more authentic with men because there is less judgement, competition, and criticism.

{ ask the angels } By Sarah Itkin, LCSW

Dear Allison,

Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve heard many women over the years say that they have more difficulty forging relationships with other women than they do with men. I think the root of the issue is that you come from a background where there is more masculine than feminine energy. Every human being contains both masculine and feminine energy and this has nothing to do with gender stereotypes. You were raised in an environment where the masculine was more dominant, therefore you are more comfortable with men than women. So now is time to push out of your comfort zone! If you expect all women to be nasty and judgmental, then those are the women you will most likely draw to you. Think about the ideal female friendships you would like to create and write them down. What inspires you to have these friendships? Is it the lovely connections you have with the mother and grandmother? What inspired you to create a sisterhood? Do you have friends or know of spiritual communities that foster these types of relationships? Also consider the beautiful feminine attributes you possess, and record this list as well. Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m sensing that you are a very sweet, compassionate person who is supportive to your friends and family. You are not afraid of other peoplesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; emotions, and you are able to express yours freely. You are not caddy at all and you treat others with respect. If you come from a place of optimism and positivity, you will draw women to you who mirror your personality. Check out meetup groups for women that offer the type of environments youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d feel most comfortable in. You are not the partying type, so a meetup located at a bar wouldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t resonate for you. Instead, you can look into groups that meet in peopleâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s

homes or coffee shops. You have a strong spiritual side, so you can look for groups that are spiritually focused. Perhaps a yoga, dance, or Quigong class? Maybe even a Kirtan or meditation circle. Since the summer months are upon us you could connect with a hiking and other outdoor adventure groups. Notice what happens when you settle fully into the beauty of who you are and come from a place of authenticity. You will encounter some women who have the same background as you, and you will draw new friends who will accept you as you are! Once you begin to open yourself up to other like-minded and loving women, more and more will start showing up for you. Set an intention that you will begin being what you would like to see which will manifest those qualities coming forth in others. As an athlete, you are used to pushing physical boundaries and taking risks that can be emotional. Why donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t you tap into these fine-tuned risk-taking abilities when it comes to venturing out to create relationships with people who are outside of your comfort zone? Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll be cheering you on from the sidelines đ&#x;&#x2DC;&#x160; Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m looking forward to hearing from more of you! Please email your question to asktheangels777@yahoo.com. Type Ask the Angels in the subject line and indicate how I should address you (using your real name, just initials, etcâ&#x20AC;Ś) in my response. Feel free to visit my website if youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d like to schedule a reading or learn more about my offerings at www. sarahitkin.com or find me on Facebook at @sarahitkinintuitivehealer. DISCLAIMER: Despite confirmed psychic ability, intuitive visions and messages are not always 100% accurate. Therefore, Sarah Itkin and any sponsors must disclaim any and all liability to all persons and parties who act or rely upon her intuition. This column is for entertainment purposes only.

Home

{ cooking with Julia k }

“Automation” for The

A Simple Sandwich Goes

BIG TIME 150

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: MAY 2017

{ cooking with Julia k } BY JULIA KHOURY

One of the best simple sandwiches I’ve enjoyed was a Pea Meal Bacon sandwich at the St Lawrence Market in Toronto, Canada. Good meat, good bread. Add mustard if you want. Like a Chicago hot dog there is no Ketchup here.

French in Rochester, NY I would get booed out of the room. As Carly Simon said, “Nobody does it better” and I will add nobody does it better than you. The point being find a recipe you like and make it your own.

Wait, Wait, wait...Before you think in any way I am not enjoying or celebrating what Rochester New York offers you would be mistaken. Because yes, there is Marty’s Meats, McCann’ Local Meats, Dog Town (I consider a sandwich) and if you get this gem together with The Poutine Truck it could be the start of the Canadian “Plate”. Sorry, I digress, I did say “simple sandwich”. We have some Canadian friends who turned us on to Pea Meal Bacon years ago and this month we have a wedding with a couple (She’s Rochester – He’s Toronto) who are incorporating this “bacon” into their carving board for their reception. They were very happy we knew the product and its effect on our Great Northern friends. We were happy we could take this simple sandwich and raise it to center of the plate status and share the love.

I will show you what we did and celebrate where we found it. If you get a chance, shoot up North for the experience of The St Lawrence Market. Then come home and celebrate our own Rochester Public Market. There is a time and place for everything. Enjoy them all.

Like most good food, this recipe is simple ingredients done well. Like most good food, there are a thousand variations all claiming the moniker of “the best”. If I likened it to Chicken

As always, thank you. Enjoy!

Julia K.

{ financial matters }

AM I SAVING ENOUGH MONEY? by Jeanna lombardi

It can seem like a multifaceted question; how much of my income should I be setting aside for emergencies, retirement and college for my kids or major purchases? Should all my savings be lumped into one bucket or should I have separate buckets? If I save separately, should the buckets be equal or should one be funded more aggressively than another? If I have credit card debt, do I pay that off before I begin saving for any of the aforementioned? Most experts advise saving 10-15% of your income. That may seem like a lot, or not enough depending on your life style and circumstances. If it sounds overwhelming, start with a smaller amount rather than waiting to start. Once you determine the amount you can comfortably begin setting aside, the next step is determining what percentage of the money will fill each “bucket”. This will vary depending on the personal financial goals of each individual or couple. Working with a financial professional to help you prioritize your goals can be beneficial as they can help you determine what your savings may look like long term, and help you direct where to allocate funds. Your advisor should always encourage having money set aside for emergencies. Home or auto repairs could come up unexpectedly, or medical bills may come up due to an illness or injury. Having money aside that’s easily accessible in a savings account can allow you to avoid paying interest on a credit card purchase. Advisor recommendations vary between 3 months and 9 months of income that should be built up as a safety net for possible situations like these.

Retirement is the time in our lives when we no longer receive a paycheck from an employer to cover our expenses. That means the money we receive has to come from an employer pension, a government pension (social security), or our own personal savings. The life style we live in retirement is largely dependent on the money that is set aside during our working years. Take advantage of an employer sponsored retirement plan if it is available to you, and if there is a matching contribution be sure you are putting in enough of your own dollars to maximize the match, or free money. Consider opening a ROTH IRA in addition to these savings, so that you have options in retirement when it comes to how much tax you pay on the income you will need. If you are maximizing both of the

previously mentioned avenues, or your income exceeds the IRS limits to allow for ROTH IRA contributions, cash value life insurance as a means for retirement savings growth is available, with preferential tax treatment. Your financial advisor should discuss the benefits of each of these savings vehicles in more detail when making personalized recommendations. College is the ever growing expense that seems unreachable to a lot of families. Even starting when your child is young, the chances of accumulating enough money to completely cover the cost of secondary education are next to impossible. Helping with a portion of what could easily be hefty student loan debts, may or may not be one of your financial goals. If planning an extravagant vacation or purchasing a summer vacation home is a short term financial goal you have, placing a portion of your savings allotment per month into this bucket could be part of the plan. Consult with your advisor again on strategies for growing this bucket beyond your own monetary investment. Keeping short term goal savings separate from retirement money for instance, avoids having to pay penalties for withdraws prior to age 59 and ½ as well as ordinary income taxes on the full distribution. Don’t wait to start setting a little, or maybe a little more, aside; your future self will thank you!!

{ IN HIS DEFENSE }

Being Aware Is IMPORTANT by DAVID JENKINS

This recurring column by David S Jenkins of Rochester Personal Defense, LLC will explore different areas and methods of personal protection and self defense. Topics will range from using specific tools, techniques, or even yourself and your mind as the weapon. The goal is to create a more aware and safer you! Questions or suggestions are welcome! Being aware is important. Take an active role in YOUR safety. A note about the new ridesharing services in the area. You may have seen the announcements about the ‘ride sharing’ companies coming to the Rochester area. Lyft and Uber have opened up for business and there are a lot of people that are going to be using those services for everything they can imagine. Convenience, cost effectiveness, and possibly that personal touch... The one thing that they have not thought about is personal security. Wait, you say. The drivers all have to do a background check! OK, that may be so, but how will you know the person that did the check is the one driving the car? Ridesharing companies don’t perform FBI fingerprinting checks conducted by law enforcement and don’t meet the drivers they hire in person. Whereas, taxi drivers undergo FBI fingerprinting. Essentially, you are getting into a stranger’s car. Think about it. Check out THIS site: http:// www.whosdrivingyou.org/ rideshare-incidents. Now, I am not saying that you shouldn’t use these services. What I am looking to do is to

make you more aware of the potential issues you may face with entering and riding in a stranger’s car that may or may not be fully vetted and licensed. One of the biggest things to remember: If your gut feels that it is not right, it’s not right. Listen to your instincts and do not let ANYONE override them. if you have to be convinced by peer pressure or other factors to get into the car, then you’re taking a bad step that could

end up becoming a horrible mistake.

Other tips:

1. Know the area. Know where you are and where you need to go. Use your maps function on your phone to see the route you are supposed to take. ANY deviation may be an issue. 2. Make sure the driver is the same as listed or shown on the app. From Uber’s site: “When you request a ride, your app sends your request to nearby drivers. After you’re matched with a driver, your app shares info about the vehicle and driver headed to your pickup location. From Lyft: “When passengers request a ride using the Lyft app, they get a text confirmation that includes the driver’s name as well as the make, model and color of their car,” says Lyft corporate communications manager Alexandra LaManna. “Passengers also immediately see a picture of their driver’s face, their car and their license plate number, and can track their driver’s arrival via GPS. We encourage passengers to confirm all of those details before they get into a car.” This displays a photo of your driver along with the vehicle’s make, model, and license plate number. When you see your driver’s vehicle at your pickup location, confirm that the license plate number displayed in your app matches the actual vehicle. Drivers will often ask your name before starting the trip. 3. Check the driver’s rating Both apps allow for a rating system. Check the rating before you accept the ride. 4. Don’t ride in the front seat

by dave jenkins

Avoid riding in the front seat. MANY incidents have happened to people riding in the front seat. Think of the seats as a barrier between you and the driver. 5. Don’t drink too much Most any of the violent cases involved a rider who was drunk. Although it’s a good idea to call for a ride if you’ve been drinking, having too much to drink can lead to a dangerous situation. 6. Never give cash Both Lyft and Uber automatically charge rides to the riders’ credit cards, so no cash is ever exchanged. If you’re asked to pay in cash, that’s a problem. Refuse the ride and contact the service if that happens. 7. Use the service as a group. Whenever possible, don’t ride alone. Remember the phrase “Safety in numbers” does apply here. On the other side, if you are considering becoming a driver for Uber or Lyft, you may want to consider that passengers seem to attack their drivers on a fairly regular basis. There’s a reason why a plexiglass shield is between the passengers and the driver in most taxicabs! Drunk and reckless behavior tend to be one of the primary causes of assaults on drivers.

In November, a shocking video of a drunken Taco Bell executive beating an Uber driver went viral. In another city, a drunk doctor was filmed attempting to assault a driver and then proceeded to kick and destroy his car. Isn’t this why your parents told you to never to pick up hitchhikers? Unfortunately, these ridesharing companies don’t do much to train their drivers. Small tidbits of info and tips do help a little, but that is about it. Some drivers have been known to legally carry defensive tools such as sprays and firearms for their own protection. Both companies suggest the use of a dash cam to record the interior but that only assists the investigation and does not do much for prevention. The good part is that the APP is linked to a credit card, usually involves people to have a profile or account, and both will also allow a driver to rate the passengers. That way, when a normally unruly or potentially dangerous client books a ride, that driver can view the rating and see what, if any, risks may be involved with that rider. Drivers can also pick and choose what areas, times, and dates they are available. Thus avoiding

some of the danger by location or timing. What this all comes down to is to avoid letting convenience override your sense of personal safety when ridesharing. Do not assume that your safety is the responsibility of the driver, and if you are the driver, do not think that the passengers will respect you or your vehicle. You, and only you, are responsible for your safety (that’s why they call it SELF defense!). Attending a course or workshop dealing with awareness, mindset building, and self defense/combative skills is paramount in your personal safety. Look for the Rochester Personal Defense, LLC self defense or firearms safety and training courses as a start. Learn what you can do to be safer! #youresafeuntilyourenot #rochpersdef #nomorevictims #besmartbesafe Rochester Personal Defense, LLC David S Jenkins is the Founder and Primary Instructor for Rochester Personal Defense, LLC, based here in Rochester. Contact him through www.safeinrochester.com or at 585-406-6758 to see what programs he offers and how you can get involved.

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ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

{ women that rise } BY Laurie Re and Carrie Gruschow

We wanted to give them the tools, time, and freedom to do something so vitally important for themselves. To dig deep. To discover who they are and realize what a difference that can make in the quality of their life.

DISCOVER WHO YOU ARE?

“After we discovered how many women were living in a gray area, somewhere between stuck and restless, we decided to teach a course called Discovering Who You Are.

Discovering who you are is simply that, a discovery. And while you are born with natural tendencies, you are not born understanding what they are. You don’t automatically know how your personality, natural life gifts, and values can be used to simplify your life, find direction, and create purpose. It takes time, effort, and even an understanding of why you need to, to see how it can benefit you. Because when we don’t know who we are, we feel unfulfilled, stuck, undervalued, not living up to our potential, lost in life transitions, easily distracted and just not sure where to start.

It starts with why.

We all get caught up in the hustle and bustle of life. We get caught up in the “do this and not that” pressure that surrounds us. But when we can take all that away and strip away the misconceptions we have about who we are and eliminate the unrealistic expectations we place on ourselves, we unveil the masterpiece we were truly created to be. And then we thrive. And we all deserve this. We all deserve to thrive. We were created to make an impact. It’s important to understand that building into yourself, or rebuilding yourself, on a strong foundation creates focus in your life, helps you identify purpose and provides direction. You give yourself permission to live from a more authentic place when you stop comparing yourself with others, especially the filtered, photo-shopped, highlight reel lives of others. When you discover who you are, you get to be YOU. You get to be the best version of yourself, one that was created with a unique design. You can then be of more value to others and make a bigger impact.

But do you really know?

Do you know your personality preference, your natural life gifts, and your personal values? Do you know how to use these all together moving forward? There is power in knowing this. It can transform how you see

the world, what you do in the world, and the relationships you have. Determining your personality preference helps you understand how you take in information, gain energy, make decisions, and approach the world. This helps you make decisions and have a better understanding of the circumstances and experiences that are the best fit for you and can even help in understanding the dynamics of your relationships. Uncovering your natural life gifts helps you understand how you are wired and what you naturally good at, not what skills you have developed over time or diplomas you have acquired. You start realizing that it takes more energy to do what doesn’t come naturally to you. And instead, use your natural life gifts to live out your purpose, feel more fulfilled, and serve others. Determining your most important values takes more thought than you would assume. We generally all understand the concept of values, our guiding principles of what is most important in our life. But do you really know your most important values? Generally speaking there are over 200 core values. Can you name your top 3 and why? Most of these topics aren’t things we learn in school or things that the majority of the population give much thought to after. It also may be why so many people feel “stuck” and “unfulfilled”. We want to help change that. We like walking you through the process so you can get clearer about who you are. It gives you a new lens to filter your life through. It helps you with decision making. It helps you examine your life to ensure that you are honoring your personality, life gifts and values in your choices, experiences, and relationships.

Everything just feels more authentic. We will be offering this course again in person in the Rochester area and can arrange a private small group or virtual session. We’d love to help you in Discovering Who You Are. You can email us at hello@womenthatrise.com to discuss options and for more information.

ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

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{ Building your Business with Biqi }

REACHING YOUR AUDIENCE Effectively in the 21st Century BY Stephanie Nitya Armstrong

T he new me d ia landscape and how it affects your business The marketing industry has changed drastically over the past 10 years. The digital revolution has taken over our lives in more ways than we’re comfortable admitting: our relationships, our weight, our health, our livelihoods. We live in a digital world. But it’s not just you and I, your consumers live there, too. So, they need to be able to find your business there as well - and when they find it, they need to like what they see. If they don’t, the likelihood of them ever stepping through your doors or calling your phone are bleak at best. Yet, most businesses are still focusing their marketing efforts on traditional media outlets. It’s time to take a look at where your consumers are and rethink our strategy. Who is your ideal consumer? Are you targeting: • Mothers? • Men between 25-40? • People who recently got engaged? • Small businesses? • People who are in the market for a new vehicle? • Home-owners? • Parents of children under 10? • People who enjoy yoga? • People within 5 miles of your establishment? It’s important to know who exactly you are trying to reach - and not just their age and gender, but identifying them on a more personal level. We are bombarded with marketing content every day, so it’s important that yours is relevant to the person seeing it if you want it to have any impact whatsoever. But, where does your ideal consumer spend their time? Recent studies show that we now spend 6.5 hours 162

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online every day and our time spent with media has dramatically shifted. Our daily media consumption now looks something like this: • 2 hours on social networks • 2 hours on television • 1 hour on broadcast radio • 45 minutes online radio • 45 minutes streaming • 45 minutes online press Does your marketing strategy match overall media consumption? It’s changed so quickly, most businesses (and marketing agencies) have not. Understanding how your clientele consumes media is critical to your marketing success. Here’s how the demographics measure up:

Ages 16-24:

• Online: 64% • TV: 14% • Game Consoles: 10% • Print Press: 6% • Broadcast Radio: 6%

Ages 25-34

• Online: 60% • TV: 16% • Game Consoles: 9% • Print Press: 6%

• Broadcast Radio: 7%

Ages 35-44

• Online: 57% • TV: 21% • Game Consoles: 7% • Print Press: 6% • Broadcast Radio: 9%

Ages 45-54

• Online: 54% • TV: 26% • Game Consoles: 5% • Print Press: 5% • Broadcast Radio: 11%

Ages 55-64

• Online: 49% • TV: 31% • Game Consoles: 3% • Print Press: 5% • Broadcast Radio: 11% Source: Global Web Index: Digital vs Traditional Summary Q1 2017 Due to the overwhelming migration to digital media, traditional media has suffered tremendously: Television is down 9-39% depending on the demographic, online radio has commanded 44% of the market share and newspaper circulation has dropped for over 15 years consecutively. Although viewership has dropped significantly, rates have not. In marketing, we determine rates by calculating how many individuals will see your marketing message (reach). All marketing mediums can be measured in a cost per thousand, notated as CPM (Cost per Mille). Here’s how the platforms measure up:

Broadcast TV: Average CPM $10 - $23 Cable TV: Average CPM $9 - $25 Radio: Average CPM $10 - $20 Social Media Marketing: Average CPM - $1 - $4 Search Engine Marketing: Average CPM - $4.03 By this point, you should be able to identify which marketing platforms your demographic uses most and the most cost effective ways to reach them. This should start to define your marketing strategy. The next step is to understand your budget. The US Small Business Association recommends businesses with annual gross sales revenue of less than $5 million allocate 8% towards their

marketing efforts. For businesses at the million dollar mark, that’s a recommended $80,000 annual marketing budget. Marketing at this level will create the desired growth when executed properly - guaranteed. Well defined business goals should shape your marketing strategy. Are you: • Building brand awareness? • Increasing website traffic? • Expanding your email list? • Growing your social media presence? • Generating leads? • Educating your consumer? • Staying competitive in your industry?

It’s imperative to understand how each marketing medium supports your goals in order to create a marketing strategy that does more than capture eyeballs, it inspires action and gently moves your consumer through the buying cycle. Consider these media platforms your business expansion tools. Put them in the hands of the right craftsman (or woman), and create a masterpiece! For help growing your business effectively, contact us today: ciao@biqimarketing.com

{ everyday push }

5 STEPS TO FITNESS by kit theresi

The fitness struggle is real! Committing yourself to your workouts is probably one of the most difficult things to do. Like any other relationship, this one too takes some work to make it a lasting one. Unfortunately, most people quit before they can actually see results, build a habit or become addicted to fitness. It’s in our nature… we are very impatient and want results right away, so we get very discouraged and stop. By quitting, you don’t get to enjoy the long lasting benefits of fitness. It’s very unfortunate because this relationship helps you age like fine wine! Years ago, when I first started my physical fitness journey, it wasn’t easy. I found myself having to fight the everyday push. Fighting with myself to get ME to workout. Although I had been on the high school track team all four years, participated in PT while in the Marine Corps, and even spent some time training with a body builder, those days were over! I had total control of my fitness and I didn’t know where to start. It was so much easier when I knew I was obligated to report to track after school, and early morning for PT while in the Corps. I just showed up and did what I was told. Those were the good ole easy days! The one thing I did learn from my experience of “forced fitness” was, there is nothing better than the feeling of being fit! So, I planned my fitness journey in steps.

Step 1. I had to join a fitness center. Commit myself! I started going to the gym, but felt like I was just bumping into walls. I was at the “feeling it out” stage. I went around the

gym trying out different machines and then would just end up on the treadmill or the elliptical. This was OK, because it was just the beginning. I knew I would work my way back to that fit feeling. There was nothing like it!

Step 2. I did some research. At my gym, I checked out the machines on the floor and asked questions. There was no time to be embarrassed. I went home and got on the

internet to look up fitness pro’s that had the look and level of fitness that I thought best suited me. I made my plan, and gave myself a realistic training schedule. One I knew I would and could commit to. My goal was to get into the gym 5 days a week. Even if I couldn’t make one of my training days, I still felt good knowing that I made at the least 4 of my training days.

Step 3.. I wrote out my goals. What did I want for myself and how I would I get there? Would I want weight loss or gain, toning, strength, energy? Hmm…. Let me think. Well, I just wanted it all! Strength, energy, fitness and to feel sexy! Isn’t that how everyone wants to feel? Next on my list was being consistent. I found that if I went home after work and left training for later in the evening, nine out of 10 times I was not going to make it to the gym. I would grab a bite to eat while home, and next thing you know, I was way too relaxed to get up and go back out. Other times I would start cleaning my house and not want to stop, so again, my training would be put off. I had to make changes!

Step 4. Implemented my master plan. I started my daily regimen of leaving work with a snack, and headed right over to the gym. This small change eliminated my excuses for missed training days. I had my gym bag packed each night and ready for my next training day. Now, I felt like things were about to get serious! Step 5. Be consistent with my training. Yes, I trained for a full week and it felt good. I

I deserved it. I was at the gym, plan in hand, and my time spent at each session consisted of well focused workouts. I kept it up for a few months, and really felt an accomplishment! By that time I was finally seeing some results, and definitely liking what I saw. At this point, if I had to miss one of my training days for an appointment, I would get upset. If I missed a week, I would feel like a slacker. These were the signs that I had built a habit, and had become addicted!

I ran myself through these steps at a very early age. The beauty of fitness is that you can start at any age. What are you waiting for? Do you have a consistent fitness regimen? If not, how old are you? Well, more importantly, how old do you feel? I am 52 years young, and I feel totally amazing! I’m pretty sure that’s how your 50’s are supposed to feel, right?

From the House of KitFit5pt0….. Commit to Fit!! Kitty Teresi BEDROC MMA Mixed Martial Artist Personal Training to Success!

How I teach fitness is how I live it. Be the best version of yourself!! ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

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{ Think opposite }

Is Travel MORE Than Just Travelling? by alison donaghey

Travel can help you step into that person you want to be by doing things that scare you. I haven’t met too many people in the western world who haven’t travelled somewhere. For some it’s all over the world (of which I am insanely jealous!) and for others it’s only to one other country, province, state, or even city. But there is definitely an allure towards travelling and getting away. Mostly when we think about travel that is exactly what we think about – getting away from it all. But what would happen if, on your next trip, you took the time to Think Opposite about travel? What if travelling is about more than just getting away, but also about self-development and personal growth? What if it’s a journey of learning about your limitations and an opportunity to step outside of your comfort zone? Everyone has different limitations and comfort zones. For some going to a third world country and backpacking without a plan is very comfortable. For others venturing into a city feels very risky. If someone says to me that jumping out of a plane is on the edge of risk, my first response is “oh, look what a risk-taker I am”. But the reality is that is not a risk for me; it is well within my comfort zone. If I had to sing karaoke when I was travelling, now that would be outside my comfort zone! So, my question to you is “Are 166

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you travelling inside or outside of your comfort zone?” If you’re outside of your comfort zone, then read no further, pat yourself on the back - you are totally using travel as a way to expand your personal development. If you are travelling within your comfort zone, then keep reading there may be an opportunity for you to think opposite about travelling.

You see, your comfort zone is yours and yours alone; it is going to be different than anyone else’s, and that is a good thing. I recommend travelling with people who will help push your limits in areas that they feel safe, and whose limits you can help push in areas that you feel safe. I remember talking to a couple that was just about to go skydiving, and they were terrified. I told them about my first time skydiving, and that what was really cool was that the ground didn’t change from the time I stepped out of the plane to the time the chute was deployed. At 10,000 feet (when you jump) and 5,000 feet (when you pull) the ground looks exactly the same. Once I left the plane (which was the scariest part), I didn’t know I was falling; it was just really loud from the wind rushing by. I didn’t feel the ground rushing to meet me (unlike bungee jumping), and then when the chute releases there is no jarring pull (it only looks that way in the movies because the camera is still falling). There is a gentle tug, then a quietness like I had never felt before, and it was just a beautiful float to the ground. After hearing this, the couple who were about to jump, visibly relaxed and were more in the moment of the experience than in the fear of what could be. Most things are like that. We fear what we don’t understand or know. Knowledge really is power. When you travel do you stay in an all-inclusive? Do you venture outside of the high walls of your hotel to see the people who live

there? Learn about the culture? See the place you are visiting? I often wonder if a person takes a cruise and never gets off the ship, do they still get to say they went to all the countries the ship docked at? Don’t get me wrong, sometimes all a person needs is a week on a ship being pampered and never having to cook a meal, but that is not what I am talking about here. And, only do something you actually want to do. I don’t want to skydive solo; it’s not on my list of something to do. But I would one day want to sing karaoke. I remember being in the Bangkok airport, it was late, I had my luggage and I had two viable choices: 1. Take the train 2. Get a cab I was tired, and truthfully, I am not adept at trains in foreign countries. I will take them, but it takes me a little while to understand.

I was tired after travelling all day, so I opted for the cab. I got to where the cabs were lined up and no one spoke English. I hear it’s an oddity, but it was my reality at the time. Through sign language and cell phones, we figured out where I was going and negotiated a fare. It really was a learning situation for me. It’s not easy to communicate without a shared language, and there was no certainty that we accurately communicated and I was going to end up where I wanted (I have many stories of where I ended up elsewhere and had interesting adventures!). All was well in the end and it was a great experience. I would never have had that opportunity to grow staying at home or by not leaving a cruise ship.

found myself in some rather foolish situations, but the point is not to put yourself in danger, it’s to step into that person you are wanting to be by doing those things that scare you a little bit but that your soul is calling for you to do, learn or see. What if you actually took the time to talk with the people in whose country you are visiting? Learn their customs. Cook their food? Who would you become having had those experiences? Who are you if you don’t?

There is a difference between taking chances and being foolish. Don’t get me wrong I have ROCHESTER WOMAN ONLINE :: july 2017

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{ healthy suppliments }

The True “Fat-Burning” Stack BY PAUL IATOMASI, JR.

There are many different Fat Burning ploys and media hype everyday, cough (Dr.OZ). Excuse me as I clear my throat. Now don’t get me wrong there is some type of small evidence that can make a case for almost any kind of supplement that preaches Appetite Control or Fat Burning properties on the market today. Though I am a big supporter of natural supplementation to help achieve any health or fitness goal, I would be lying if I didn’t tell you that Diet/Nutrition is 80% of achieving your optimal body composition. Exercise/ Activity level is around 15% and Supplementation would be roughly the last 5% give or take. Now with that being said, If no supplementation is taken you have to get that last 5% somewhere which means that you may have to jack up your activity level , which could mean 1 extra cardio session a week or you may have to adjust your calorie intake plus or minus a little to get a similar results. Now the idea behind this is that by adding in certain fat burning supplements and taking them at the perfect time of the day you could manage to not have to do that extra cardio session a week which would also help you maintain more muscle mass and burn more actual fat so your overall body composition would be more impressive, as well as enjoy the overall health benefits you would also attain by taking these supplements im about to list in this article. So let’s dive into some of the key fat burning accelerators:.

Multivitamin/Multimineral

Vitamins are essential to life. They contribute to good health by regulating the metabolism and assisting the biochemical processes that release energy from digested food. They are considered micronutrients because the body needs them in relatively small amounts compared to macronutrients such as carbs, proteins, fats and water. Enzymes are essential chemicals that are the foundation of certain human bodily functions. They are catalysts 170

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in the chemical reactions that are continually taking place within the body. As Coenzymes, vitamins work with enzymes thereby allowing all the activities that occur within the body to be carried out as they should. Therefore making the body run at a more optimal level.

by the body for proper functioning.. Any brand that has all vitamins A-Z and all minerals, with atleast 100% of the daily allowance right down the line is also essential. I recommend taking any Multi-vitamin with food, for better absorption.

Of the major vitamins, some are water soluble and some are fat (oil) soluble. Water-soluble vitamins must be taken into the body daily, as they cannot be stored and are excreted within four hours to one day. These include vitamin C and the entire B-vitamin family. Fat-Soluble vitamins can be stored for longer periods of time in the body’s fatty tissue and the liver. These include vitamins A, D, E and K. Both types of vitamins are needed

Green tea contains compounds known as polyphenols, including phytochemicals that have antioxidant , antibacterial, antiviral, and healthenhancing properties. Tests on Epigallocatechin gallate (EGCG), a particular type of polyphenol in green tea, has shown that it is able to penetrate the body’s cells and shield DNA from hydrogen peroxide, a potent free radical. Green Tea also protects against cancer, lowers cholesterol levels, and reduces the clotting tendency of the blood. It also aids in fat loss due to the regulation of blood sugar and insulin levels. By regulating insulin levels there will be less lipid storage in the brown fat tissue. It also helps increase increase your resting metabolic rate for a short period of time, usually a few hours.

Green Tea Extract

There are multiple different forms of Green Tea. Liquid Green Tea in the form of a liquid dropper, pill form and also a Tea form in Tea Bags. I suggest taking Green Tea first thing as you awake on an empty stomach and do consume calories for atleast 15 mins post supplementation.

L-Carnitine

Carnitine is not an amino acid in the strictest sense (it is actually a substance related to the B vitamins). However, because it has a chemical structure similar to that of amino acids, it is usually considered together with them. Unlike true amino acids, carnitine is not used for protein synthesis or as a neurotransmitter. Its main function in the body is to help transport long-chain fatty acids, which are burned within the cells, mainly the mitochondria, to provide energy from those lipids (so in essence it is an actual fat burner). So in essence Carnitine is a non-stimulant supplement that helps provide energy production from fatty acids, so it would give you more energy

from fat coming in from your nutrition or at a deficit the goal would be to used that stored fat as fuel to be burned. This is a major source of energy for the muscles. Due to breakdown of fatty acids, it helps prevent fatty build up especially in the heart, liver and skeletal muscles. Doctors have found that Carnitine may be useful in treating chronic fatique syndrome (CFS). Carnitine reduces certain health risks posed by poor fat metabolism associated with diabetes; inhibits alcohol-induced fatty liver; and lessens the risk of heart disorders. Carnitine has the ability

to lower blood triglyceride levels, aid in weight loss, improve the motility of sperm, and improve muscle strength in people with neuromuscular disorders. Carnitine is available in pill, liquid and powder forms. Most are sold in potency of 500 or 1000mg servings. It is most effective in the 1.5-4 gram dosages. I recommend taking a serving as you awake on an empty stomach and do not consume calories for up to 15-20 mins post supplementation, and another dosage 20 mins before another meal. *If you mention this article at the GNC Store located in College Town Plaza on Mt. Hope,

you will receive an additional 10% off any of the above products mentioned plus you can pick my brain or my good friend Justin at the store. Paul Iatomasi is a Professional Natural Bodybuilder, Nutrition Specialist and Contest Prep Coach as well as a Bodybuilding Contest Promoter and Fitness Model. Paul can be reached via email at piatomasi@themindsetlife.com or on Facebook and Instagram (Paul Iatomasi Jr).

N { no excuses } by julie m. may

According to Time Magazine, the top resolutions that women made in January… (and therefore most likely to be broken) include:

Get Fit Lose Weight Eat Healthier Get Out of Debt Quit Smoking Get Organized Volunteer

THERE W I L L BE NO EXCUSES...

How are you coming on your New Years resolutions?

It’s halfway through the year, time to look back and fess up. After a few glasses of champagne, it’s easy to believe you will change everything about your life as easily as Cinderella did at the stroke of midnight.

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ever really get our shit together. Realizing that you are responsible for what happens next in your life, is both frightening AND exciting. Successful people know that they are responsible for their life. It doesn’t matter where they started, or how many times they fail, the fact is they are successful because at some point they stopped making excuses for not doing or having what they wanted.

And many of us did make resolutions. In January, gyms were stuffed like holiday revelers. Of course, reality is, those same gyms are now empty and running ads to get another crop of new customers, enticing you to try for that elusive “summer body.”

Anything you want is within your reach. Forget about being too broke, too busy, too inexperienced, too old, too overwhelmed. Your whining, your blaming and all of your excuses have never gotten you a single step closer to achieving your goals and dreams.

Maybe you made a simple resolution... one not hard to keep. Like vowing to write the year 2017 correctly on all the checks and documents you dated. That’s probably going well by now. Maybe you vowed to spend more time with family, knowing full well if you don’t cut down on your spending and get out of debt you’ll be moving in with them anyway.

Money can be earned. Time can be made. Education can be acquired. Relationships can be nurtured. Habits can be broken. YOUR GOALS CAN BE ACHIEVED!

Or perhaps you are just too cool or too cynical to make any resolutions at all anymore. Maybe you have given up defeated because you failed multiple times to make any changes of behavior that lasted longer than the last piece of free pizza in the office lunch room. But there really is, truly, only one reason resolutions fail and only one way to get them back on track.

You just have to change one habit. It’s that simple and will impact every area of your life in the best possible way: Stop making excuses.

Excuses are what we use to sabotage ourselves from being happy... as in “living your dream life, top of the world,” deliriously happy.

Excuses are insidious. They develop gradually and creep in from every direction, like Kardashians. We label our story and feel sorry for ourselves because we believe the label: “I can’t join the gym until I lose 20 lbs.” “I can’t save money until I get a better job.” “I can’t eat healthier because I don’t cook.” “I’m not in a good relationship because all the single men are jerks.”

And the one we all use practically every single day... “I can’t ‘fill in the blank’ because I don’t have time.” Excuses are like assholes. Everybody has one, and they all stink. Yet, we accept them like death, taxes and award shows. Excuses are what we use so we don’t have to

We can all make things happen for ourselves, as long as we become willing to give up all the excuses we’re using to hold ourselves back. So we are half-way through the year but you still have time to make the changes you promised yourself that you would make that magical last night of 2016. Write down your goals and read them every single day. Then challenge yourself… no whining, no blaming, and for goodness sake NO MORE EXCUSES. If you want to make a new mid-year resolution make it that. It’s your life. Nobody is going to make things happen for you. Personally, one of my goals was to start writing again regularly, which I avoided because I “didn’t have the time.” Yet there I was, on level 1996 of Candy Crush. So I stopped my whining and started writing again. Now I am doing Press Releases for friends, blogging, interviewing celebrities, and writing a cover story for Rochester Woman Online. Then there is the 20 lbs I was going to lose… according to the scale, 26-weeks into my diet I’ve lost… a whopping 3 lbs. So now I have to rethink my workouts and eating habits and how I am going to achieve that goal because it’s crunch time. I don’t want to start 2018 with the EXACT SAME GOALS I had this year and hope next year I will get “around” to them. The time is now. The year is flying by. The first step is to figure out what it is you really, truly wanted to accomplish in 2017. Then decide what you need to do to get it… there’s six months left. Make the most of the rest of the year.

You can do it. No excuses.

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{ speaking social media with tamara }

What Does Social Media Do For Me? BY TAMARA MACDUFF

I get asked this question a lot. I am not so sure it’s the question that should be asked, though. It’s not so much about what social media can do for you – it’s about what can you do for social media. I know, it sounds cliché. It’s true. Social media success is about how much you bring to the table as it is what it can bring to your business. When I say “social media is important to your business” that means nothing. Lots of other things are important to your business too. Things like, cash, customers, products & services. Without any one of those things your business is on the losing end. So it is with social media. If you feel your business isn’t receiving any value from your social efforts, chances are it’s not about the platform, it’s about you.

It’s Not About You

Trust me, it’s not all about you. In today’s digital world, it’s as much about what you give as it has always been. To be sure, social media is a powerful tool and one that businesses need to understand. Business owners need to understand how to wield its power and harness its abilities. Social media will NOT: • Save your business • Get people to like you more • Increase your sales • Make your event a success I’ll give you a minute. I know what you’ve been told. I’m speaking the truth here. If you do not nurture your presence online, by feeding it with content and watering it with engagement yourself, your online presence will die; just like my houseplants. 174

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Stop telling everyone how great you are – that is so 2000. Nobody cares; because everybody is great at what they do, just ask them. The one thing everyone misses – the Miracle Grow of the digital world – is what you give.

H o w I I ncr e a s e d M y Influence 10x

Because every story starts with ourselves, I’ll tell you how I increased my influence both online and offline becoming known for social media. In a nutshell what I did was participate and share other people’s content. That’s it. I gave my all to the social sphere and digital space and they responded. It took me several years and I’m still not known as well as I want to be.

What I’m Known For:

• Giving freely quality advice on social media • Staying on top of what works, by industry, in the digital realm • Being authentic • Creating social media strategies and digital strategies that bring results

• Increasing sales for clients • Increasing event attendance for clients • Increasing awareness for clients People seek me out now. When my name is mentioned they know I’ll give them the advice they need not the advice they want to hear. When I say social media others think “Facebook” those who have been in my classes think conversation. The ones who think conversation have the best return on their investment and largest increase in their influence.

Giving To Get

It really is about giving to get something. This is how business has worked for over 2,000 years. Digital and social have made the world a much smaller place, however, nothing has replaced the golden rule. Give before you get. It’s crowded out there. How will you stand out from your competition? If your competition is all about how great they are, their products, and following “best practices” that don’t fit their goals, their industry or the platform they are on, how do you think you will stand out if you compare yourself to them? It’s not about the numbers. It isn’t. It’s still all about the quality. How else can I get one client so much interaction on a post about which color of ink is her favorite? They only have about 2,000 likes on their page, their reach is 3x that organically because I do not follow best practices or industry standards for the platform, digital sphere or anything else.

Posts like those have generated an increase in awareness of her brand, increase in sales and an increase in her website traffic generating more interest and conversation offline than anything else she has done. People come into her business excited to see her, her staff and talk about her Facebook page. Do your customers do that? Do they hang on your every word on your social platform?

Engagement Is A Lousy Metric

In most cases this is very true. All the social media gurus will tell you “it’s all about the engagement.” No. It’s really not. In fact, the truth is that most of the people who engage with your brand on social won’t be doing business or hiring you. You will be doing business with those who talk about you, those who do not engage openly on your social sites or your website and yet they have seen you, read about you or otherwise have interacted with you. Usually offline. Don’t count the likes. Seriously, stop it. Don’t count the comments. Respond to them, like

them, don’t count them. Comments and Likes are not what will drive your business results and increase your sales. Count the shares of your content, count how many times someone comes to your event, offline, and talks about your Facebook page, its posts or your blog posts. If you aren’t able to move the conversation offline because you haven’t been giving social media it’s full due, you won’t be able to reap the benefits it has to offer. Think about it. Ask yourself what have YOU done for social media lately? When was the last time you interacted with the people on your page? When was the last time you, as your page, interacted with other business pages? How many likes are you giving vs. how many likes do you want? Give to Get. Give Likes – you never know where it will lead you.

Love Isn’t Love Until You Give It Away

Share the love on your social sites. Take the conversations and relationships you have built offline. Meet for that coffee and genuinely want to help the other person. Maybe they will do business with you. Maybe not. Maybe they will collaborate with you. Maybe they can introduce you to someone in their network who needs you. Maybe not. One thing I know for sure – you have to get out from behind the keyboard. You have to give of yourself to get anything for yourself. Your business won’t grow just because you have a Facebook page and a Blog. Water them. Nurture Them. Tamara MacDuff is a social media and content strategist who brings her clients beyond the click, like and follow. She drives sales & influence from strategic and measurable social media campaigns. She is a Mom, competitive coffee drinker and an avid music fan, especially of Bon Jovi and Sixx:A.M. She loves coffee and conversation; reach out and say Hello on Facebook, LinkedIn or Twitter.

july

sunset beach yoga location: charlotte beach TIMe: 7:30 PM - 8:45 PM

more info: http://www.yogadrishti. com

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zoo brew location: seneca park zoo time: 5:30 PM - 9 PM

ROC Womenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Music Fest

Brass & Be Launch

location: parcel 5 on corner of main and cortland st.

location BRASS BAR &

TIMe: 5 PM - 10 PM

more info: 4455a.blackbaudhosting. com

more info: www1.ticketmaster.com/ event/000052C990AA254C

TIMe: 9 P

more www.facebook events/71268

august

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elvedere unch Party

LA FITNESS CUSTOMER APPRECIATION NITE

soiree grand opening

location: & LOUNGE

location: LA FITNESS HENRIETTA

location: 258 alexander st.

TIMe: 5-8PM

TIMe: 5:00-pm

TIMe: 12pm

more info: https://www.facebook. com/SoireeOnPark/

more info: www.ortensiadeloren. com

PM - 1 AM

info: facebook.com/ 83418939152/

more info: EMAIL NETWORKROCQUEEN@ GMAIL.COM

queens in the park location: blu wolf bistro