KONSHUU
vol. 53 #3
APRIL FOOL'S
i ain’t ever seen 2 pretty best friends JJK x Lain x Dr Stone x AoT x JJBA Art By Nicole Oliva
KONSHUU | Volume 53, Issue 3
THIS MONTH’S FEATURED SERIES! ANIME RECOMMENDATION
フロリダ (Florida)
A classic mainstay comedy slice of life anime for the ages. Despite its age, the classic interactions of the main protagonists, the “Floridians”, are indeed ubiquitous in cultural memory for viewers everywhere. Those who enjoy older series like California and Hawaii should try out Florida - the anime series that dragged itself forward at a rate of 1 mile/week so that later ones could walk.
Spring 1845, Florida's State Government
By Ronald Dion DeSantis 64,312+ (176 seasons)
ANIME RECOMMENDATION
________ Nothing. Anime is a terrible medium. Why are you watching it? Ew… cringe… _______ _______ _______
KONSHUU | Volume 53, Issue 3
CHECK OUT OUR YOUTUBE CHANNEL! Featured Videos:
Upcoming Videos:
Promised Neverland Doodle (Version 4)
Summoning Sukuna Fingers :3 (bake with me)
The Vocaloid Episode | CAP #4
Short Animation Draft - Anime Witch Girl
Waifu Wars
Speedpaint - Tao Jun from Shaman King
Released March 10th
Released March 24th
Sreamed live on March 27th
Coming April 3rd!
TBA
TBA
Watch these and more at cal.moe/youtube!
KONSHUU | Volume 53, Issue 3
Waifu Wars #1
Haruhi Suzumiya, Sephiroth Kirby, Sesshomaru, Sukuna, Megumin Art By Mitchell Madayag
KONSHUU | Volume 53, Issue 3
D.Gray-Man Art By Sharrel Narsico
KONSHUU | Volume 53, Issue 3
WHAT DOES DABI DO!? KHALEA RIDAD
Writer
4th Year, English
Big brain theory, smol brain writer
SPOILERS FOR MY HERO ACADEMIA ! Dabi is one of the mysterious villains that joins the League of Villains after the Hero Killer: Stain is arrested. As soon as he appeared in the manga, everyone was interested in this burnt-up, pretty boy and created theories about his background, waiting for Horikoshi to reveal more details about him. Unfortunately, there are no details about Dabi's life before he became a villain, so here’s a theory; based on subtle details in the manga, Dabi is a stripper. There are few details about Dabi’s background on how he became a villain, however, we know he admired Stain’s ideology, and his pimp, Giran, introduced him and Toga to the League of Villains in their underground bar. What was Dabi doing before? How was he surviving? Why were there no mentions of sightings of his Cremation quirk? The answer is simple. He survived in the underground as a stripper burning the dance floor with his hot moves. Dabi’s blue flames are too conspicuous in public, but they serve as cool special effects on stage. If anyone gets injured? Well, it’s their fault they got too close trying to play with fire. Dabi don’t need no protection.
Fire Burnin’ After meeting Giran and the League of Villains, Dabi got a HUGE wardrobe change, from rags to riches in his new decked-out leather fit. You would think that as a stripper, Dabi would be making bank, but since stripping is his job, why not burn it off
to add that dramatic *flair*. Let’s not forget to mention he paid for property damages. Once Dabi entered the LoV, there was no worry about making money as he quit his job to become a full-time villain! Strutting in his new fit, they even kidnapped Bakugou! Unfortunately, All Might and other heroes raided their base to save Bakugou and took Kurogiri and his bar with them, so they were officially broke. As the only other person besides Kurogiri capable of getting a job, Dabi took up stripping again to support the League while looking for potential followers, like Hawks. Now, how did Dabi get his alias? For those who have heard, it has been confirmed that Dabi is Touya Todoroki. In recent chapters, Dabi spilled. the. TEA on the number 2 turned number 1 hero in his family. Dabi’s story showed how little Endeavor cared for his children as he obsessed over beating All Might. Touya’s desperation for his father’s recognition and the lack of turned him into the badass villain we see dancing as he reveals the heroes' dark secrets happily. Touya wanted to be the bit*h to ruin his family’s life so he became Da Bi**h.
After Dabi’s grand performance getting everyone’s attention by telling his story on television, he revels in the fact that he was able to bring the pristine image of the heroes down and the people’s faith in heroes sink even further by revealing the dirt on the top 2 heroes, Endeavor and Hawks. You can definitely bet that Dabi had a blast seeing Endeavor and Shouto’s expressions like they saw a ghost when he revealed his true hair color. Now he can dance the night away and rest a bit knowing as people’s faith in “Heroes” is falling and chaos won’t stop anytime soon.
KONSHUU | Volume 53, Issue 3
TINDER NO JUTSU, BELIEVE IT! Naruto Uzumaki, but you can call me Nards
Writer
1st Year, Undeclared
bruh did you actually think i was born with the name nards
Tip #1: Make sure your bio is bussin’, believe it! Vulnerability is an important part of any relationship, and there’s no better way to do that than throwing your whole tragic backstory out there, believe it! Don’t worry about running out of space, believe it! Just continue your story on a new profile, believe it! Shadow Clone Jutsu, believe it! Tip #2: Swipe right on everybody, believe it! Make friends with EVERYONE, believe it!. And I mean EVERYONE, believe it! EVERYONE deserves a chance, believe it! By chance, I’m talking about sweet talking them into realizing the error of their ways, believe it! Of course you don’t have to make a lifelong commitment to everyone, believe it! Save that chakra for your soulmate, believe it! “But Naruto-sensei, how do I find my soulmate? Believe it?” Fear not, students of mine, believe it! Just focus on the characteristics of your dream (or real) rival, believe it! Tip #3: Anybody can use genjutsu, even me! Believe it! Anything can be a talent if you try hard enough, believe it! This one’s pretty simple, there’s just no shortcut to becoming Hokage, believe it! Tip #4: Ramen dates, believe it! Ask every prospective companion about going on a ramen date, believe it! I’m still convinced that it’s the fastest way to someone’s heart, though I actually know some people who might say otherwise, believe it I guess. If they straight up say no—or even worse, that they don’t like ramen—report them immediately, believe it! Some villains just can’t be changed, believe it! But if they say yes, then you’re definitely in for a good time, believe it! Just make sure to run like a rasengan when the waiter comes through with the bill, believe it! That’s what I do with Kakashi-sensei, believe it! Why else do you think my froggy wallet is looking nice and thiccy lately, believe it?!
Tip #5: The pick up line is outdated, believe it! Why pick up when you can bust down, believe it?! Be confident with your endless flow of support, believe it! What’s the use of possibly making them uncomfortable when you could compliment their incredible fighting stance instead, believe it?! Dive in headfirst, believe it! Spell something wrong, believe it?! Make like me and act like nothing happened, duh, believe it! Extra points if you make them laugh with the ridiculous expression you have plastered on your face as a defense mechanism, believe it! Tip #6: Those who don’t follow the rules are scum, and those who abandon their friends are worse than scum, but those who think ghosting is a good idea are worse than worse than scum, believe it! If it happens to you Though, don’t fret it, believe it! It’s a calling to develop 1000 versions of your best technique to use against them in the future, believe it! Tip #7: The ninja headband goes where you go, believe it! If you’re a compulsive splurger like me, at least convince yourself it’s for a good cause by purchasing one for the best of your friends, believe it! You might think you’re not capable of running after anyone and I respect that, believe it! But if you come across someone who drops their headband and doesn’t look back or even scratches it with no remorse, that’s obviously your sign to do a little jog, believe it! Disclaimer: Please use common sense when interacting with other people online. Dattebayo.
KONSHUU | Volume 53, Issue 3
EXCLUSIVE JOJO SNEAK PEEKS ATHENA CHEN
Artist
3rd Year, Physics/Statistics
This is gonna age worse than victims of The Grateful Dead. JOESTAR: The Inherited Soul is a special event for the widely-acclaimed JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure franchise that will be held on April 4, which is a mere 3 days after this issue’s publication. Indeed, fans are excited. For one, we’re getting to see the voice actors of all five animated parts’ protagonists interacting with each other during the livestream. But more importantly, there’s the possibility that important questions will be answered and even more important details will be revealed regarding the anime. The number one question on fans’ minds is, of course: will Stone Ocean, the sixth part of this legendary manga series, be animated? Lucky for you readers of Konshuu, I’m here to disclose the answer ahead of time. Thanks to my uncle’s cousin’s friend’s roommate who works for David Production, the studio behind the JoJo anime, I’ve obtained some juicy and totally real “insider details” about this event. To start off: no, a Stone Ocean adaptation will not (yet) be confirmed. Surprisingly, another Rohan OVA will not be announced either, despite how obsessed Hirohiko Araki is with the guy. What is planned to be revealed at the event, however, is a live-action adaptation of the light novel spinoff Jorge Joestar, featuring Duwang “The Rock” Johnson as Kars (all 36 of them).
Also to be revealed at the event is a new line of merch: for the low, low price of 69420 yen, you can be the proud owner of an authentic™ Stand Arrow. If you’ve ever dreamed of having your own punch ghost, now’s your chance! Be sure to place a pre-order as soon as they become available, as these will no doubt sell out fast. (Side effects may include increased muscle mass, a more extravagant fashion sense, sporadic urges to strike poses in public, or death.) Furthermore, the unreleased final chapter of the JoJo’s Bizarre Married Life doujinshi will be made available in June 2021, over 21 years after it was created. In one scene, He-who-will-not-benamed-due-to-spoilers dies from postpartum bleeding after struggling to lay an immensely large egg. This counts as one of his infinite deaths, thus making the doujin official canon.
Yes, this is canon now. But that’s not all: my mom’s friend’s niece’s babysitter has privately interviewed Araki, who stated that Muhammad Avdol is actually a furry and Magician’s Red is his fursona (birdsona?). He also offered a simple explanation on how King Crimson works: imagine a pizza, cut into eight slices. Each slice is a section in time. Now, imagine King Crimson as a rolling pizza cutter. When the user predicts an attack, they use the pizza cutter and eat the center of the pizza so it resembles a donut, just like the donuts King Crimson made a few unfortunate individuals into. Get it now?
Have a smol Jolyne as consolation.
Clearly, the staff behind JoJo has some very exciting reveals in store. I should emphasize again that all these leaks are 100% authentic. And now that you’ve gotten a taste of what’s coming, I hope you all are looking forward to Sunday (and future JoJo events) as much as I am!
KONSHUU | Volume 53, Issue 3
SUPER TUBERS TAMMY LEE
Artist
3rd Year, Environmental Science
You know as someone with slight trypophobia, this article wasn’t the brightest idea. It’s 2020. It’s no secret surprise that everyone should be staying at home. Within the anime manga community, this truly was a “gamers rise up” reddit moment, where it seemed that now staying at home was the cool thing to do… nah… it was still lame to be honest…. But days turned into weeks and weeks turned into months; even weebs are starting to think this lockdown sucks majorass. But lo and behold amongst the world’s concentrated crystallized boredom manifested itself in the explosion of cute 2D anime waifus popping up all over the web, the vtubers. Why just watch videos for 2D anime waifus when you could also simp for 2D anime waifus during an economic recession (not so sure if this is what they meant by stimulating the economy). Although the notion of present day vtubers has always been around even in 2016, it’s very easy to link quarantine for such boom in popularity. However, what you might not know is that there’s actually a totally real legitimate secret side to the whole “vtuber” business. Even if you don’t know, it’s easy to guess “vtuber” originates from two words “virtual” and “youtuber;” but some cases don’t strictly adhere to this breakup of the word. Most notably, plenty of them stream on Twitch rather than Youtube, but you and I would absolutely still call them “vtubers.” In reality, this would make “-tubers” a blanket term. So let’s introduce the different types of tubers that you might not know....
dtuber: made out of a striated muscle that allows for voluntary control, dtubers in particular can be split up into 4 different types depending on their location, their length must be adequate enough to connect both the outlets of the renal system and seminal vesicles [et] t[u] [ber]ute: is it bad I liked her better than to be?
g it sure is boring around here, my boy this peace is what all true warriors strive for, I just wonder what Ganon is up to, your majesty Ganon and his minions have seized the island of Koridai, hmm how can we help, it is written “Onlyfans link can defeat Ganon,” great I’ll grab my stuff, there is no time your sword is enough, how about a kiss for luck, you’ve got to be kidding…tuber ptuber: probably friends with the dtubers… ttuber:
btuber: more effective in bunches than just a singular, if you don’t want to go through the trouble of building an entire wooden house, you can just grab a bunch of these to put in your yard, hang up in a little box, and then just wait for the bees to buzz in to help with pollination ctuber: develops from a free-swimming, pelagic, nonsymbiotic trochophore larva, which enters juvenile (meta trochophore) development, becoming sessile, and subsequently acquiring symbiotic bacteria. The symbiotic bacteria are not present in the gametes, but are acquired from the environment through the skin in a process akin to an infection. The digestive tract transiently connects from a mouth at the tip of the ventral medial process to the anus...
Ztuber: did you know the letter “z” is actually pronounced “zed” instead of “zee,” heard it from my Canadian friends… they’re definitely right...
KONSHUU | Volume 53, Issue 3
Staff Picks:
BEST WAIFU ALEX TREBK
JEOPARDY!
YUBI YUBI
WHAT MAKES YOU THINK THIS SUPERIOR ENTITY CAN BE CONFINED TO A SINGLE SERIES
Tony T.
NICOLE O. (aka the genius behind nards)
For decades and decades to come, Trebek’s character arc will be the gold standard under which we judge character narratives. Though Trebek at times resembles a classic tsundere, what with his tendency to constantly correct others’ mistakes, he turned out to be a fascinatingly developed character. Top tier waifu for 1000
Catapulting our precious vtuber Inugami Korone to infinite cuteness and fame—with a perfect dash of sadism—Yubi Yubi has captured the hearts (and mouths) of everyone across the globe, including, but not limited to, the violent menaces to society known as Itadori Yubi, Yubikage Kira, and Ken KanYubi.
PEKORA
HOLOLIVE
LAIN
SERIAL EXPERIMENTS LAIN
ATHENA CHEN
ROHIT AGARWAL
I heard everyone was simping over some rabbit vtuber is this it
Tony told me to put this here. Apparently she’s “based”?
GINTOKI SAKATA
TINKERBELL
MITCH MADAYAG
TIFFANY TRAN
A waifu so cute she later got her own anime
A classic tsundere
ASSASSINATION CLASSROOM
PETER PAN
KONSHUU | Volume 53, Issue 3
Last Month's Poll:
GREATEST HISTORICAL FIGURE IN ANIME 3th Place (5 votes): Osamu Dazai (Bungo Stray Dogs) Shinsengumi (Gintama) Princess Kaguya (The Tale of Princess Kaguya)
8 votes
2nd
Place
4th Place (4 votes): Jeanne d'Arc (Fate) 5th Place (3 votes):
Moses (Beyblade) 10 votes
1st
Place
Aleistar Crowley (D.Gray-Man) Gilgamesh (Fate) Jesus (Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure) 8 votes
2nd
Place
Old Jouishishi (Gintama)
Thank you to everyone who voted! This Month's Poll:
BEST HUSBANDO
AND MORE! VOTE FOR YOUR FAVORITE! To vote: go to cal.moe/poll cal.moe/poll!!
Results will be featured in next month's issue!
VOLUME 53, ISSUE 3 APRIL 1, 2021
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CLUB EVENTS Follow us on social media or visit cal.moe for updates! Weekly Virtual Game Nights: Thursdays 8-9pm
CAA Discord - cal.moe/discord
STAFF Mitchell Madayag
Crystal Li
Tiffany Tran
Cosette Moskowitz
Sophia Xue
Heaven Jones
Miranda Zhang
Erik Nelson
Sharrel Narsico
Khalea Ridad
Tammy Lee
Nicole Oliva
Kate Bushmareva
Tony T.
Grace Li
Felix Levy
Editor-in-Chief Layout Editor
Artist/Layout Editor Artist/Layout Editor Artist Artist Artist Artist
Artist
Artist Artist
Writer Writer Writer Writer Writer
Athena Chen Artist
Konshuu accepts guest submissions from club members! If you’d like to have content featured, please visit:
j.mp/konsub
Colonel Sanders
I Love You, Colonel Sanders! Art By Heaven Jones
