TIMELINE
LIVING
La Vida LOCKDOWN BY KAY-DEE MASHILE
D
on’t eat all the apples, the Doctors are already away! Listen! Do you know how much food you can consume in just one day of sitting at home?! Now, consider that there is you multiplied by the number of people in the house with you. We all need to be considerate in our eating patterns. Especially since you’ve spent your retirement on wiping out the toilet paper isle. It will get ugly too quickly if everyone keeps on “living life as normal” when life clearly isn’t normal. Can I also just say that life must continue after the 21 days? Don’t sell your house Aunty, Jesus has not sent a “Save the Date” for His return yet. Hunger will still be there when The Rona is a goner!
C
lose your mouth when you chew… While we’re all doing our best to survive this global disaster, I have but one humble
kréhon SWIFT
plea. Or rather an announcement. Yes, here is: Kay-Dee’s Public Service Announcement: There is absolutely nothing to gain from doing what you know annoys the people around you. Okay, that’s rude. Let’s try a more Christian approach… Please try to be a decent person. Flush the toilet (shhh, don’t tell the other Capetonians, let’s all pretend together). Okay, something more environmentally friendly, clean the bathroom after taking a bath/shower (we’ll get to the cleaning part later though, this is one is near and dear to my heart). Let us just try to be decent people in these trying times. We cannot also be trying each other on top of everything that’s happening. So, just a reminder, please close your mouth when you chew…
52
T
ake a vacation from your feelings catching ministry Listen! Stop catching feelings, there are germs going around. You is gon get siek! No like, seriously. Being at home comes with too many reasons for you to get deep into your feels, don’t! If you don’t want these 21 days to feel like a lifetime, don’t allow everything to get to you. If you are easily offended by nature, let this be a bootcamp to train you on the art of not catching feelings. But how do you even begin to not get mad, Kuz? I’m glad you asked, just remember that everything is not about you. Not even what people say about you is about you. If you really cannot can, walk away. It is more important to be kind than it is to be right.
issuu.com/krehon
