Latest 7 Issue 313: 20-26 March 2007

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3/15/07

6:47 PM

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www.latest7.co.uk

latest

Cars The weekly listings and TV guide 20–26 March 2007 FREE

£21,990

wide awake club get no sleep with faithless

foreign estrange too much home from home £3,990 from tempest4cars see page 2

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pages starts on page 42

latest

jobs woofers and eaters weighty pet issues

power house jodie kidd gets with the electric sky programmes

highly paid professional positions web developer/ programmer electric sky see page 47

administration assistant property moves see page 45

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CARS

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CARS

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004_LS313 Brighton centre

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latest 7 7 What Katie says

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Latest Cars

contents

latest cars

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24 Music

Books and flu in Bath

The Pet Shop Boys’ gig and latest news

8 Eminemmylou

26 Foxy Mamma Malone

Shiva Govinden’s volcanic rap

8 Dani’s diary

The eating habits of baby Malone

26 Brighton Music Network

Making plans for the summer

8 Backlash

Behind the scenes of the music industry

9 In depth

Upcoming club nights and late bars

28 Gay

Staying up late in town with Faithless

Dining dykes, Wild Fruit and sex confessions of an Archbishop

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10 Celebcity The Queen pays a royal visit to our city and celebs plan to stop by for festivities

29 Theatre The Unexpected Guest, French Without Tears and foxy star Basil Brush

11 Competitions Fantastic CD, book and DVD giveaways

31 Events & kids Creative fashion workshop and a wild weekend in Portslade

11 Crossword Test your word knowledge

32 Art 12 Cover feature

A storm-wrecked Brighton Level

Electric Sky and Brighton TV make waves in local and global media

33 Seven days to live Seven things to do this week

14 Bare cheek Locals and celebs stick their oar in

34 Reviews Comedy, killers and a little happiness

14 Stars Hollywood-inspired star signs

35 Day-by-day listings guide Our complete guide to local gigs, clubs, comedy, theatre and family events

15 Stand-up comedy Q&A with Laurence and Gus

41 Venue directory 15 Marc the vet

Our guide to local venues

Obesity affects man’s best friend

42 Latest jobs Fancy a career change? A look at Ozone Financial Recruitment, Dean Wilson Laing Solicitors, Wired Sussex, Lynn Cannell, plus top new positions

Baby bloom – the facts on fertility

19 Food Dinner, drinks and perhaps an overnight stay at The Griffin Inn

48 Latest TV Complete television listings guide, must-see TV movies and Dani’s take on some of this week’s shows

20 Latest hot list Our top restaurants, cafés and bars

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21 Recipe Spicy meatballs made easy

Cover photograph

22 Cinema Local listings reviewed and rated

Jodie Kidd (pictured right) presents Fashion Avenue for Electric Sky Productions

01273 818150 Business Director Angi Mariani Advertising Director Lynne Edwards Creative Director Andrew Kay Production Director Fiona McTernan Finance Manager Sharon Caple Art Director Stephen King Production Manager Neil Ive Advertising Manager Kate Knight Website Manager Paul Burgess

Production Editor Victoria Nangle

Music Editor Jeff Hemmings

Production Assistant Zara Friend

Staff Writers Matt Chittock Craig Driver Katie Glass Miranda Glavin

Chief Sub-editor Wendy McAngus Senior Sub-editor Philippa Smith Sub-editors Ashley Bird Joe Curtin Billy Imrie Colette Meacher Designers Anand Day Peter Knight Jamie Powell Steve Sawyer

Advertising Sales Rhoda Barker Emma Burton Administration Heather Holland Claire Peerless Stefan Reszczynski Latest Homes Unit 1, Level 5 North New England House New England Street Brighton BN1 4GH

Editorial: editorial@thelatest.co.uk Advertising: lynne@thelatest.co.uk

All the best columnists: Jo Brooks, Katie, Dani, Eminemmylou, Marc the vet, Andrew Kay, Victoria Nangle, Cheeky Boys, Mamma Malone, and Miranda Glavin Starts page 7

Latest Listings The Brighton, Hove and Sussex day-by-day guide to what’s on, with highlights of music, nightlife, film, art, comedy, stage and other events Starts page 22

In-depth look at local companies and the best highly paid jobs this week Starts page 42

Latest TV

latest tv

Editor Bill Smith

Latest 7 Upfront

Latest Jobs

latest jobs

17 Health

Hundreds of quality cars for sale every week with Tempest4cars See page 2

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27 Nightlife

Why ‘all-inclusive’ is holiday hell

latest listings latest 7 upfront

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The best-loved TV guide in the world… probably! Your complete inimitable guide to what’s on TV this week, plus the best films and Dani’s unique take on what’s on Starts page 48

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KATIE’S COLUMN

What Katie says Katie intends a weekend of literature, but discovers what often happens to best-laid plans

Brought to book This week I ran off to the Bath Literature Festival. It was easy.

So easy, that I gloated at my own initiative all the way from my front door to the railway station.

I threw two dresses, four pairs of tights, some ‘f*ck me’ heels, a notepad and my credit card into a bag and – hey presto! – an hour later I was cruising through green fields on the GWR with the sun shining through the window.

I bought a mini bottle of Pinot Grigio in the buffet car and spent the journey with a big red pen in my hand, circling the authors I would seek out to interview when I arrived – like a kid flicking through the toys section of the Argos catalogue.

“I want that one, that one, and that one,” I planned. “Five minutes with him, ten questions for her and a signed copy of his

autobiography.” (When you’re a journalist you’re used to getting spoilt).

By the time I skipped out into the Georgian streets of Bath I was high on cheap white wine and anticipation. The sun was shining, my heart was singing, and John Carey – my hero – was there for the interrogating.

“I circled the authors I would interview – like a kid flicking through the toys section of the Argos catalogue” I sneezed. A grey cloud broke into rain. If I hadn’t been in such a good mood I would have noticed then that this was the beginning of the end. Instead I rushed off to my first talk at Bath’s impressive Guildhall.

So, this was supposed to be a column about books. That,

Image: Chris Ashfield

after all is why I have come all this way to the literature festival and why my lovely cartoonist Chris has drawn that excellent picture of me swamped in a pile of multicoloured hardbacks looking miserable/sexy/librarianish.

It was going to be a column about how the literature festival went; it was to tell of how funny Iain Banks was, how Kate Adie didn’t turn up, how Denis Healey patronised me, how John Carey shook my hand and how Melvyn Bragg is even more filthy in the flesh.

But somewhere, after my sneezing began a double act with a hacking cough, and my head turned to cotton wool, it stopped being a column about literature and started being a delirious rant about the injustice of finding yourself knocked out by flu when you’ve got a literature festival to write about.

So this isn’t a column about literature. Right now I can hardly spell it.

Instead, it’s just the miserable grumblings of a girl whose mind has turned to mush and whose eyes have filled with water and whose nose is as red as Rudolf’s – but less pretty. A girl who’s found herself stuffed up in bed with no fewer than two duvets and a thick cable-knit cardie, with a wad of tissues to her left, a teapot filled with Rooibos to her right and a bowl of clove oil burning on the table ahead of her.

Outside in Bath, a cider-fuelled, book-reading, intellectually sparring, world-class-author-riddled literary festival is happening – but I can’t leave my bed.

People criticise journalists all the time for being subjective – or worse still – liars. They call for objectivity and truth as though they’re some Holy Grail a writer should aspire to.

So this is the truth about my trip to the Bath Literature Festival – I am bored and I am ill. I am alone and miserable, in a gloomy West Country bed.

And, in the course of telling you about it, it now seems an appropriate time to suggest that lying about it would have been so much more interesting.

Dear Katie Dear Katie, I like your column and a lot of the things that you have to say, but I’m afraid I think you are wrong about David Cameron.

I think he is right to suggest that he, like all politicians, has the right to what he terms a ’private past’. It is bad enough that we are already living in an age where so many who go into politics do so as career politicians, and perhaps the only way to encourage ‘outsiders’ into the political field is to allow individuals who are entering politics to draw a line under their pasts.

After all, people can learn to change. And I dare say even you have said or done things you now regret.

As you yourself suggest, sometimes it is those candidates who have a past that can have the most interesting things to add to the political sphere. But only by allowing them to keep that past to themselves might we attract them to it at all.

David Dear Katie I read your column all the time – but I don’t know why.

All you seem to do is moan about stuff. I can hardly believe you are actually being paid to produce this rubbish on a regular basis.

But the worst thing you’ve written yet is all that nonsense about Jade Goody. Chutzpah?

Cheek? Crap more like. Anyway, you’ve told us before that you don’t even watch telly, so maybe that’s the real explanation for why you like her so much – unlike the rest of us you’ve never actually had to suffer her.

Get a life and get a real job and get a better role model.

Sally Comments, queries and general chitchat can be sent to: katie@thelatest.co.uk

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3/14/07

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THE RHYME

Eminemmylou The UK’s first and only rap and spoken word column. This week with Shiva Govinden I get all sorts writing to me: here, the rhyming volcanologist Like a pyrotechnic poet or a volcano-rap anthropologist But how many words can you rhyme with lava?

This fearless guy’s got it rapped up, without any palava I’ve visited 11 volcanoes in the world, Began in ’87 with Trou aux Cerfs, of which few of you have heard.

That’s located in Mauritius – an extinct crater lake, In ’03 onto Japan where a weather-swept Mount Aso’s summit I couldn’t make.

Ventured onto Hakone, riddled with sulphur and steam vents, That place stinks – far worse than the stench of camping, three in tents!

In Hawaii I hiked to the top of Diamond Head, A trek that costs you a dollar, so you’re not seeing red.

That same afternoon I foolishly tried to walk to Koko Head, Gunshots from cadets’ fire convinced me to return: didn’t want to be dead.

A few days later on Big Island – the amazing Kilauea, Got to see a huge crater, and red hot flow of lava.

Extensive basalt flows had covered a road, Awesome volcanic power from a vent through landscape mowed.

The one to visit next was Etna: Europe’s biggest, like an angry bee, Extremely dangerous one, had to be careful cos me mum was with me!

Its summit craters rumbled above my mum and I, Awesome noise like that could make your eardrums cry.

The final two I’ve been to are in the Aeolian Islands, Panarea and Stromboli, with differing sands.

Extinct Panarea had white sand, Stromboli black coloured, Amazing to see, glad these places we discovered.

Stromboli erupts lava fountains every forty minutes or so, At night it’s a breathtaking firework display, so you don’t feel low.

Where volcanic hazards are concerned, you know rarely in advance, You have to be so careful, you get no second chance.

People think I’m nuts for having this hobby, But I don’t, for beauty and power like that you can’t lobby!

Every single volcano I’ve ever seen has been great for learning, Up there you feel so small when you see the way pyroclastics have been burning.

Would be nice to visit another volcano – very soon I have a date, Off to Mount Aso in Japan I go, not going to sit here in Hove and stagnate!

Send rhymes and a pic to: eminemmylou@thelatest.co.uk

The backlash starts here Rose Gunn on why she prefers her holidays to be different to her real life…

If I were ever stupid enough to apply to go on the TV programme ‘Holiday Swap’, my idea of holiday hell would probably be a luxury ‘all-inclusive’ holiday centre in tropical climes. To me, going to a beautiful country some 5,000 miles away, then not actually seeing it, is a heinous crime. I am aware that, to most people, this is ’holiday heaven’, as the popularity of these glorified holiday camps speak for themselves. I understand why, because I too was brought up to believe that a holiday was a place where you did everything exactly the same way as you did at home, only in the sun, with better scenery and no going to school or work.

We never went abroad when I was young. My mother’s fears of foreign food and people from council estates made it too risky. So we went to Dorset in the 1970s, where we would get up at the crack of dawn, make our own sandwiches (just like at home), then commute several miles to the beach where it would be impossible to park and my dad (and indeed the car) would be near boiling point after driving round looking for a space for two hours. Then we'd sit on the beach all day, moaning about how windy it was and how much sand had got

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RELATIONSHIPS

Dani’s diary aged 19 Dani the “over-hormonal, yoyo-knickered teenage strumpet”* is making plans for the summer In an effort to make sure this year goes without a hitch, I’ve written a list of everything I need to do. These lists are mainly for me to use to organise myself for the summer. They are very complex, but without them I don’t think I will make it to – or through – the festivals I have in my diary. I have written down everything I will need, how much it will all cost, where I can get things from and for how long I will have to temp to get there.

This is really dull, but this is what my life is like now. People say that once you accept anxiety as part of your life you will deal with it better, but I think they are lying. I have been dealing with it for about nine months now and I know it’s something I can’t just brush off, but knowing that hasn’t made it any easier – it’s actually made it harder. Imagine if you knew that every day for the rest of your life you will have to walk on egg shells. You will have to wait and see how you feel on the day because you can’t plan anything and, if you do, you spend the time up until then so nervous you can’t sleep or eat! It’s awful, and I think it’s really unfair that I have to deal with it. But that’s the way it is. I can’t change it, no matter how hard I try.

I want to give up smoking this year but I’m having a hard time working out how I’m going to make it through my life without the one thing that seems to help me stay sane! I know it’s bad to say that, but honestly,

“People say once you accept anxiety as part of your life you will deal with it better, but I think they are lying” when I have a bad panic day the only thing that gets me through it is a ciggie. If I make it through the whole bus journey without freaking out and getting off early then I’ll reward myself with a fag. Because I’m addicted, I use it as an incentive to get myself to do the things I no longer find easy to do. If I had enough money I might reward myself with a pair of shoes, but I can’t afford it. And don’t mutter under your breath that if I didn’t smoke I could use that money to buy shoes!

My list for today contains 14 things I have to do, so I should really get on with things. I’m trying very hard to live in the moment and not let this beat me, but when the thing you have to deal with is something that can pop up at any point without any warning, it’s hard. I can accept that in this very moment I feel OK, but I know that I could very well be sitting in the corner rocking back and forth the next. The lists and the ciggies don’t stop me having panic attacks, but they help me deal with them when I do.

Preparing for something like going away to a festival is now akin to a military operation, because if I forget something from the metaphorical comfort blanket that is my list, then I’ll be screwed. Well probably not, but I will believe that I won’t make it through to the end.

This is rubbish. I’ve accepted it but it’s no easier. The bloody liars! *New Currents, January 2006

into the sandwiches. We'd then go back to the B’n’B for a gruesome dinner, served at precisely the same time we usually had it at home.

Because I was a ‘poor local’ in London for many years, I had neither the time, nor the money to go on holiday for about 10 years. Then, at the age of 28, I booked a package tour to the Canaries, which cost £149, including flights and accommodation. After a day, I was horrified to realise that the hotel was full of dysfunctional British families, they sold Kellogg’s Corn Flakes in the shop, and I might as well have saved my £149 and got drunk with my own dysfunctional family at home, where there was actually far more to do.

Fortunately, we became friendly with a local DJ, who introduced us to a few Canarian traditions, one of which involved drinking copious amounts of the local ‘Jerez’ ’til 6am.

“We never went abroad. My mother’s fears of foreign food and people from council estates made it too risky” I've never booked another package holiday. To me, a holiday is somewhere away from my ‘safe’ world. If I'm lucky, it might include danger, foreign food and poor locals. If I can speak the language, all the better as it's easier to get out of – or sometimes into – trouble if you know the local dialect. I once met a man in a bar who’d just been to Morocco. He was very sniffy about the fact that the locals ‘weren’t very good at speaking English’. To him, I'd say: Dorset’s quite nice at this time of year.

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3/14/07

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INDEPTH

Won’t want no sleep

Prepare for a large bout of insomnia as Faithless come to Brighton.

Katie Glass looks at what makes them so special Faithless already seem such an institution in British dance music, that it's hard to believe that they only formed just over a decade ago, in 1995.

Although ‘founded’ might be a more appropriate way to describe their coming together, since the group is ever reforming from a diverse collective of musicians, that remains centered on its founding members – rapper Maxi Jazz, producer Rollo and DJ Sister Bliss.

Coming together from a background built on the momentum gathered in the rise of illegal raves and pirate radio, one that was storming the UK underground scene in the 90s, Faithless was one of the first dance groups to make the transition from the dance floor to the charts. And are still best known for their classic anthems that span the two worlds – ‘Insomnia’, ‘God Is A DJ’ and ‘We Come 1’.

Critically acclaimed and award winning, Faithless’s phenomenal international success can only be a result of their inimitable combination of ambient, euphoric music and spiritual, socio-political lyrics. Of which ‘Insomnia’ is no exception: I used to worry, thought I was goin’ mad in a hurry Gettin’ stress, makin’ excess mess in darkness No electricity, something’s all over me, greasy Insomnia please release me and let me dream of makin’ mad love to my girl on the heath Tearin’ off tights with my teeth But there’s no release, no peace

I toss and turn without cease Like a curse, open my eyes and rise like yeast At least a couple of weeks Since I last slept, kept takin’ sleepers But now I keep myself pepped Deeper still, that night I write by candle light I find insight, fundamental movement, uh So when it's black this insomniac take an original tack Keep the beast in my nature under ceaseless attack I gets no sleep, I can’t get no sleep, I can’t get no sleep, I can’t get no sleep I need to sleep, although I get no sleep I need to sleep, although I get no sleep

“They bring hip hop and dance genres together in a cataclysmic cocktail” Someone once told me that what made dance music great, was when you could dance to it in a club and talk about the lyrics on the way home.

And it’s a definition I come back to every time I hear Faithless play. Since their ability to make an incredible tune, one that is guaranteed to get the crowd writhing in time, is only equalled by their searingly sophisticated lyrics.

The group have previously described themselves as a hybrid of hip hop and dance, but, like their founding members’ talents, they bring those genres together in a cataclysmic cocktail more impressive than the sum of its parts.

It's hard to identify any single unit in the Faithless mix that makes it so exceptional.

With artists as impressive as Dido (who is Rollo's sister), Pauline Taylor, Jamie Catto and Zoe Johnston among those who have guested in the line-up, still no addition or subtraction appears to make them lose momentum.

With four albums under their collective belt (Reverence, Sunday 8pm, Outrospective and No Roots), a greatest hits compilation (which comfortably flew to number one in the UK charts selling over 1.2 million copies) and now a fifth album out, To All New Arrivals, the band seems unstoppable in its meteoric rise.

But among their most incredible and unforgettable moments have been their live performances, especially those at the summer festivals, such as V and Glastonbury – earning them Q magazine’s Outstanding Performance award. Perhaps what this reveals is the core of what makes Faithless unstoppable – an enigmatic quality, which goes beyond music or lyrics, to their sheer contagious energy.

Faithless are at the Brighton Centre on Tue 27 Mar, at 6.30pm, tickets are £25. For tickets see www.brightoncentre.co.uk or call 0870 900 9100 latest 7 9

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3/15/07

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AROUNDTOWN

sponsored by

Celebcity with Jo Brooks

Right royal affair

Bagelman-ia Spotted: actor Neil Pearson, best known for his role in Drop the Dead Donkey, in Bond Street tucking into a smoked salmon bagel at the Bagelman. I’m told that Neil is rather fond of the round holey rolls and is a regular customer!

Kevin’s midnight turntablism

Lunching in Brighton last week Jo spotted the dear old Queen of Blighty and a soap princess Last week the city was buzzing in anticipation of a visit from HM The Queen and everyone’s favourite royal consort, The Duke of Edinburgh.

HRH visited the Theatre Royal before having lunch at Brighton Racecourse.

I spotted the Queen as her motorcade left the Jubilee Library with its police outriders, and I headed over to meet a client in Carluccio’s. The restaurant felt like national press central command as it was taken over

by Fleet Street’s royal correspondents filing their copy while enjoying steaming bowls of gnocchi. Also spotted lunching amid the throng was actress and local resident Patsy Palmer, who was clearly talking business with her partner Charlotte Cutler.

Kevin Rowland, 80s legend of Dexys Midnight Runners fame, has found a successful new career as a DJ. The Kemp Town crooner has regular slots at Arc on the seafront strip, and other clubs around the country where a mix of soul, reggae and Motown is on the playlist.

Correcting the wrong impression An apology to actor/impressionist Alistair McGowan, who was just seeing if his ticket was valid for travel and not queue jumping at all, as we said the other week. Thanks for getting in touch with us Alistair – everyone at The Latest are really pleased you enjoy the magazine and welcomes you to Brighton.

Celeb-spotting heaven

That woman off the telly

Brighton Festival has announced its programme for May, which will provide scope for some very good celebrity spotting in and around the city. Gordon Brown, David Dimbleby, Andrew Marr and Shami Chakrabarti are the political big hitters who will be speaking, with Vic Reeves and my personal favourite Leslie ‘Hellooo’ Phillips.

My usual weekly lunch at Wagamama took a weird turn of events last week as I ended up taking part in a new BBC1 game show called Hard Sell. I was just about to tuck into a chicken katsu, when a group of people trudged in with cameras, booms and all that in tow. They sat next to Jackie, Will and myself and it wasn’t long before the chap next to me began to ask for some local knowledge.

The aim of the show, it transpired, is that two contestants – after being dumped in a strange town – are given a large suitcase full of random objects to sell to complete strangers. Another team were in their home town of Reading. The team that made the most cash was the winner.

The two chaps in question met on another game show – Deal Or No Deal. Yep, you guessed it, they were game-show junkies! I ended up being talked into taking part and buying a pretty rubbish remote control car for £50 – God, I am such a mug! The film crew duly arrived at the office an hour later to film the sale. I tried my best to look surprised at all the right moments and they even bought me a Wagamama cookbook as a gift.

David Dimbleby

Comedy celebrity anagram of the week: Kevin Rowland = “Raved link now”

Andrew Marr

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Jo Brooks is director of Brighton-based PR company JBPR Ltd, 01273 622555 www.jb-pr.com

To comment on any of these stories or send in any news stories email editorial@thelatest.co.uk

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COMPETITIONSXWORD

In it to win it

latestcrossword

solutions on page 26

Get your hands on these great giveaways!

Moya Brennan – Signature CD Currently touring the UK is the first lady of Celtic music – Moya Brennan. For those who can’t make it to the concerts (London is as far south as she’s going this time around) we have two copies of her fabulous Signature album to give away. Looking back over a life less ordinary, this new album features twelve superb tracks.

To win one of two copies send an email to competitions@thelatest.co.uk with ‘Moya’ in the subject box. Don’t forget to leave your name and contact details.

Remington Steele Season 1 DVD Bond is back – well, previous Bond star Pierce Brosnan is in series one of Remington Steele, out now from Twentieth Century Fox Home Video (www.fox.co.uk), featuring 22 episodes on six DVDs. When private detective Laura Holt invents a boss named Remington Steele to boost her business, she suddenly gets more than she can handle when he appears in the flesh! To be in with a chance of winning one of two copies on DVD, email competitions@thelatest.co.uk with ‘Remington’ in the subject box.

Butterfingers book New out this month is Butterfingers, a funny and gripping adventure about a princess snatched from her secret garden by a terrifying monster. When gallant knights fail to save her, will clumsy Ned the stable boy be able to do what others have failed?

A fresh fairytale with illustrations and end-of-chapter cliffhangers to delight all youngsters.

To win one of two copies send an email to competitions@thelatest.co.uk with ‘Butterfingers’ in the subject box.

Jane Austen classics DVD Out on DVD from 26 March is the boxset of the recently aired ITV adaptations of Jane Austen’s Mansfield Park and Northanger Abbey. It also includes a classic production of Emma starring a young Kate Beckinsale, and is ideal for fans of period dramas. To be in with a chance of winning one of two copies just send an email to competitions@thelatest.co.uk with ‘Jane Austen’ in the subject box along with your contact number and address.

Cryptic 84

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Quick 84

ACROSS

DOWN

ACROSS

1 Fresh rum becomes unwieldy (10) 8 Sound out crazy Communist night shelter (7) 9 Bring back something of worth for the girl (5) 10 Holy man reforms city right and left by the book (8) 11 Undersize robbers keep nothing (4) 13 The supernatural cull starts in less than a month (6) 15 Vegetable container is found in waste heap (6) 17 Prominent feature of the north has nothing to do with the south east (4) 18 In flight it’s described as the Iron Bear (8) 21 Motionless device for the drinker (5) 22 Shorten one connector (7) 23 Puritan with toe transplant attracts notoriety (10)

2 Use most of the steering gear to make a milk holder (5) 3 Vegetables can be kept in a cool crib (8) 4 Complain if there's no string noise (6) 5 A gem is worth nothing, chum (4) 6 See the festival one way or another (7) 7 Split the atom – a ball or party needs it (10) 8 Musician or singer with nothing on finishes up the winner (10) 12 Harsh words arise because circuitous bus tour ends at the square (8) 14 Get the money man – he is cavorting in the saloon (7) 16 Princess given a role as Athenian judge (6) 19 Commercial set in town is received in most homes (5) 20 Woman’s clothing creates a mishap (4)

1 Conductor of sale (10) 8 Measure (7) 9 Jewish doctor of law (5) 10 Magician (8) 11 Milk substance (4) 13 Beset injuriously (6) 15 Proof-corrector (6) 17 Excitedly eager (4) 18 Drink (8) 21 Non-professionals (5) 22 Within a building (7) 23 Manual skill (10)

DOWN 2 Open sore (5) 3 Cross (8) 4 Egg dish (6) 5 Nobleman (4) 6 Bounce back (7) 7 Desolate region (10) 8 Welcoming (10) 12 Protector (8) 14 Idiotic (7) 16 Star sign (6) 19 Withdrawn (5) 20 Religious song (4)

Patrizio Buanne – Forever Begins Tonight CD If your mum was left unimpressed with this year’s Mother’s Day gift, why not try to make it up to her with a chance to win a signed copy of Italian Patrizio Buanne’s new album, Forever Begins Tonight.

Reflecting the era of 50s/60s entertainers including Frank Sinatra and Dean Martin, this smooth and romantic album is a must-have, following as it does his top ten debut album The Italian from 2005.

To win one of two copies of this signed CD send an email to competitions@thelatest.co.uk with ‘Patrizio’ in the subject box along with your name and address.

Rock Fresh DVD Weinerworld releases an electrifying documentary on March 26, delving into the world of graffiti artists, looking at the artist’s struggle between the codes of the underground and the lure of the mainstream including MTV and Red Bull. Not to be missed!

To win one of two copies email competitions@thelatest.co.uk with ‘Rock Fresh’ in the subject box. Entrants must be aged 15 or over.

To advertise call Kate on 01273 818150

Collection/delivery ordering service for

IKEA goods Tell us what you want, and we’ll deliver it. Simple as that.

No traffic. No queues. No rows. No hassle.

FEARLESS MIKE 01273 711166 As seen on TV.

admin@fearlessmike.com

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Ask about our flatpack assembly service We are an independent limited company and not part of the Ikea group.

For coverage in this magazine email editorial@thelatest.co.uk

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16/3/07

10:07 AM

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ELECTRIC SKY

Benita Matofska

Jodie Kidd

Power house Andrew Kay meets up with the team at Electric Sky and Brighton TV, who are making waves in a global TV marketplace Brighton has certainly become a major centre in the world of film and TV – hardly a week goes by without there being a film crew somewhere in the city. But this, in fact, is the tip of an industry iceberg that has formed here on the south coast. Beneath the surface is a pounding media community, and at the forefront of that is local company Electric Sky and Brighton TV. The company is actually split into three separate companies and David Pounds is the CEO to all three: Electric Sky (the international distribution company) headed up by Karen Young who is commercial director, Electric Sky Productions (the production company) and Brighton TV (the facilities house).

Electric Sky is a well-established distribution company selling programmes such as A Place In The Sun to other TV stations all around the world. Known well in the industry, the company specialises in distributing lifestyle and documentary programming. Recently it took on a new one-hour documentary special by fellow Brighton producer Back2Back called Model Prisoners, which goes in search of Brazil’s most beautiful female prisoner.

Electric Sky Productions is an experienced and respected production company winning commissions by international broadcasters and a huge portfolio of successful programmes, including Fashion Avenue, a popular lifestyle series presented by international supermodel Jodie Kidd.

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Brighton TV is a leading studio facility in the South. With a vast range of edit suites, camera hire and equipment, the company’s recent clients include: Discovery Real Time, Animal Planet, Gallery HD, Ultra HD, Ricochet South, Lambent Productions, E! Entertainment, The History Channel, BBC, Channel 4 and ITV. I went along to the Montpelier headquarters to meet a few of the people behind the scenes at this thrusting media firm, and to find out what the future has in store. Executive producer Benita Matofska joined the company a year ago from Ricochet, where she was head of development. Her remit now is to focus on terrestrial TV commissions. ‘‘Up until now the company has worked in a truly international marketplace, generating programmes for a global market, which is unusual as most companies start the other way round, making terrestrial TV programmes and wanting to break into that larger market,” she says. “We have already made hundreds of hours of programmes and returning TV series for the international market, which makes us a reliable and experienced supplier for the terrestrial market. ‘‘Five months into joining I was thrilled to have a commission from Channel 4 for a very exciting and highly controversial documentary which, due to the sensitive nature of the subject matter, we are not able to announce just yet, but it’s likely to be a ground-breaking film. We’ve recently won a big commission for

Channel Five – a documentary series called Make Me Brilliant. This unique project features child psychologist and ‘genius coach’ Bernadette Tynan, an extraordinary woman -new talent that we’re bringing to British television. In the series she scours national public-sector schools looking for children who may have been overlooked – perhaps they’re lacking in confidence or are considered ‘just average’. Bernadette discovers their hidden talents and transforms these kids for life.

“It is amazing to see her work. With quiet or sometimes disruptive kids she can see through what’s holding them back, building their confidence and enhancing their potential by giving them the creative stimulation and space they need to develop their skills. Many of her techniques are relevant to all of us – she recommends trampolining for 30 minutes each day. Apparently each time we fall, we land differently and each time the brain is forced to find a new way to get back up. It’s a cerebral workout that hones our problem-solving skills.”

Make Me Brilliant will work with 7- to 11-yearolds and it’s likely there’ll be one programme made in a Brighton school. It’ll be a great opportunity for all participating schools since the whole school will benefit from Bernadette’s brain-busting techniques. ‘‘We have also been awarded some provisional Channel 4 funding for development which is dependent on match funding from Screen South,” continues Matofska. “This money, a total of £50,000 with the essential matched funding, is awarded regionally and will be used to expand our development team and ultimately boost our production output here in Brighton. In turn, that will create jobs and work for talented people in this region. We have an “Make Me Brilliant’ presenter Bernadette Tynan

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ELECTRIC SKY

Sally Jenkinson

excellent professional team here with unique skills, but above all we get access. We access the stories, the people and the places that other people just do not get, and we are good at finding and breaking new talent.’’

“Beneath Brighton’s surface is a pounding media community, and at the forefront is local company Electric Sky and Brighton TV”

Jon Lee

We have a great team of researchers who have fantastic contacts and build strong relationships with hospitals and doctors. Again, as Benita says, our strength comes in strong face-to-camera material with the real people in the story.”

Jon Lee heads up Brighton TV’s facilities. ‘‘Back in 2000 the company was basically distribution based with copying facilities and one edit suite. Now we have 16 edit suites, expanded our premises twice and grown even

further, making us the largest facilities house in the region and the one that most professional companies now choose to use. We are about to become a 24-hour service too. ‘‘We have also moved into high definition and are already the leaders in that area in the South. Much of that work is for the American market where they are at least three years ahead of us. While Britain invested in widescreen TVs Americans have stayed with an old format but gone for high definition. ‘‘We also do a great deal of re-versioning of programmes. That can be as simple as removing ad breaks or as complex as removing and replacing voice-overs, and title and credit sequences.

“The initiative to push for regional commissioning of TV meant that many London companies started with just a desk and phone out of London locations. That has changed. Major companies like Ricochet are now totally based here in Brighton and the city is fast becoming a major centre for TV and film production, with Brighton TV as the leading facilities house with full postproduction services.’’

Electric Sky and Brighton TV are perhaps not names that you know – until now that is, and they are certainly names that you will be hearing a lot more in the future.

Electric Sky and Brighton TV, 1 Clifton Mews, Clifton Hill, Brighton. Call 01273 224240 or visit www.brighton.tv www.electricskyproductions.tv or www.electricsky.com

Executive producer Sally Jenkinson is currently working on a series called My Shocking Story which will be premiering on 29 March on the Discovery Channel (also called Amazing Lives for international sales). ‘‘These are extraordinary stories about remarkable people,” she says. “In ‘Coma Miracle’ a drug trial sees people who have been in a persistent vegetative state returned to their families for varying periods of time. It’s very emotional. In ‘My Face Burnt Off’ burns victims undergo ground-breaking treatments in which cells are regenerated and, quite literally, faces restored – again, incredibly moving stories and brilliant technology and medical innovation. In ‘Sleep Sex’ we look at people who perform sex acts in their sleep, an uncommon disorder that can affect relationships, families and even end up in charges of rape. Another series for Discovery Home and Health, Fat Doctor is not an overweight doctor but a brilliant surgeon who performs life-saving surgery on the morbidly obese. The programme takes a close look at how we adapt to changes in our physical appearance.

‘Coma Miracle’

‘Fat Doctor’

Jodie Kidd in Fashion Avenue latest 7 13

014_LS313_cheeky/stars

15/3/07

4:30 PM

Page 2

ONLY JOKING!

Bare cheek

Spotted

I regret nothing. My father was Werther And my mother an itinerant flea.

My stomach may be flabby but my Hooded eyes see all. I walked Along sluttish East Street, A compromised Kleist. The wind Blew a KFC carton straight at me And I didn’t flinch. The sun Minted doubloons in strangers’ eyes.

The sky was Mahler. And not Three thousand miles away from Where a soldier once burnt a village, Loving napalm like a mistress, I saw Jeremy Clarkson and two friends Sipping Pinot in a brasserie, And witnessed him send the fish back, His broad face honeyed with bright malice.

Brian Mitchell and Joseph Nixon’s thoroughly scurrilous Brighton column

In & Out IN • Tiny Rowland • Having a BCG • Within These Walls • ‘Einstein A Go-Go’ • One Cal

with Peter Porter

OUT • Body popping • Playing silly buggers • Mighty Joe Young • Forgetting your wedding anniversary • The Equalizer

Stick your oar in!

An occasional series in which we ask the opinion of both celebrities and lowly proles on a local issue.

This week – the Frank Gehry towers.

Are they a bold, exciting statement that would finally put Hove on the map, and dazzle both natives and visitors with their astonishing postmodern deconstructivism for centuries to come, or was he just a bit pissed when he drew up the plans?

COUNCILLOR MIKE GOOLEY I have great faith in the Gehry project, and firmly believe it will draw tourists from all over the world, revitalising the local economy and proving a cultural jewel in our crown.

My opinion has in no way been influenced by the huge backhander I received. Heh heh heh. Oh bugger. Is that thing switched on?

LOCAL COLUMNIST BARRY KIDDING When this old warhorse was knee high to a grasshopper, buildings were buildings – good old fashioned edifices like the Pompidou Centre, the Solomon R. Guggenheim Museum in New York City, and the Sony Centre, Berlin. They might not have been exciting or outrageous – but they were solid and reliable, virtues that are part of what makes this country great. That is why I believe Frank Gehry should be beheaded and his body dragged through the streets of Brighton.

MRS BETTY RAMSBOTTOM (79), PATCHAM I think instead of these so-called towers the money should be used to build an enormous, 900 foot statue of Tony Danza, the good-looking American actor who played cabbie and failed pugilist Tony Banta in the TV series Taxi.

NICK CAVE Strewth! It looks to me like this Gehry bloke’s been at the grog! Either that or the wacky baccy! The man’s obviously a galah. These towers’ll fall down within the week and kill everybody, mark my words. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

FRONK GAHRY, PORTSLADE Gehry is a genius, and you bastards should be grateful he’s deigned to design something for your miserable little city. Jesus, I don’t know why I bother sometim es. Him, I mean. I don’t know why he bothers sometimes.

MRS BETTY RAMSBOTTOM (79), PATCHAM I think instead of these so-called towers the money should be used to build an enormous, 900 ft statue of Oscar James, the good-looking Caribbean actor who played Tony Carpenter in EastEnders.

FRED MARRIOTT (97), HANOVER Blimey! What an eyesore. If you ask me this blooming Yankee doodle dandy Frank Gehry can stick his towers where the sun don’t shine, where the monkey shoves his nuts. Up his arse I mean.

MRS BETTY RAMSBOTTOM (79), PATCHAM I think instead of these so-called towers the money should be used to build an enormous, 900 foot statue of Joe Maplin from the TV comedy sitcom Hi Di Hi. Of course, Joe Maplin never actually appeared in the show so nobody knows what he looks like. Therefore I would suggest basing his appearance on that of Tony Danza, but wearing the beret that Tony Carpenter habitually wore perched atop his head.

STARS

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ARIES (MAR 21–APR 20)

CANCER (JUNE 22–JULY 22)

LIBRA (SEP 23–OCT 22)

CAPRICORN (DEC 21–JAN 19)

In the words of Jerry Lewis, you are a multifaceted, talented, wealthy, internationally famous genius Aries.

Have a lie down at Bardsley’s.

Bette Davis on Lillian Gish, “She ought to know about close-ups.

Jesus, she was around when they invented them!”

“I don’t mean to be a diva, but some days you wake up and you’re Barbra Streisand,” said Courtney Love, and isn’t that just so, Libra?

Mickey Rooney married eight times.

His marriage licence reads: “To whom it may concern.” Trivia quiz: which famous Capricorn married nine times?

TAURUS (APR 21–MAY 21)

LEO (JULY 23–AUG 22)

SCORPIO (OCT 23–NOV 21)

AQUARIUS (JAN 20–FEB 19)

Brad Pitt once said, “People think I look fantastic. It’s like everyone has a crush on me.” This week, you will be able to relate to the modest Brad Pitt.

Tallulah Bankhead on Bette Davis, “If I get hold of that hag I’ll tear every hair out of her moustache.” Bette Davis didn’t give a hoot.

“Why do people treat me with fun just because I am the biggest, strongest, and most beautiful man in the world?” asked Arnold Schwarzenegger.

“You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood, place it in the navel of a fruit fly, and still have room enough left for a producer’s heart.”

GEMINI (MAY 22–JUNE 21)

VIRGO (AUG 23–SEP 22)

SAGITTARIUS (NOV 22–DEC 20)

PISCES (FEB 20–MAR 20)

Julia Roberts said, “Gwyneth Paltrow is pretty in a British, horsey sort of way,” or was it: “If Cher has another facelift she’ll be wearing a beard.”

“Oh God! She looks like a chicken,” said Truman Capote of Meryl Streep.

The moral? Make like a Hollywood actor and say cutting, poultry things.

Lana Turner said: “I planned on having one husband and seven children, but it turned out the other way around.” Probably a Sagittarian.

The stars this week come from Hollywood, where the filthy rich rub shoulders with the very rich and where everything is true, including the lies.

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To talk to Astral Angi please email angi@thelatest.co.uk

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3/15/07

10:26 AM

Page 3

STAND-UP COMEDY

A laughing matter Victoria Nangle has a chat with sketch show whizzes Laurence and Gus

PETS

Marc the vet Paul O’Grady Show’s Marc Abraham says fitness drugs are no match for looking after your pet

Q You did well in Edinburgh. What are your best and worst experiences of playing the Scottish Festival?

A ‘The Scottish Festival’? Is Edinburgh now like Macbeth and it’s bad luck to speak its name? Or do you apply the formula to all things Scottish, just to be safe? The best bit about Edinburgh (I’ll take my chances) is always the same – drinking in the childlike whoops and broad beam grins of those punters who enjoy the show, and who manage somehow to overlook that they’ve paid through the nose to sit in a sweltering classroom.

Worst experience? We went to Edinburgh by train in 2003, with our set and baggage in the guard van. For three days after we arrived there were two big suitcases sitting in the hall of our flat. Each of us thought they belonged to the other, but didn’t say anything, until Laurence looked at the luggage labels and realised we’d blithely stolen the possessions of a Canadian couple on their way back to Ottawa. Actually, that was quite fun.

Is your pet overweight? If so, could it be because you are too?

Now, I rarely get annoyed about medical developments in the UK veterinary industry. After all, it’s the same ‘kingdom’ that’s ’united’ about being a ‘nation of animal lovers’. Yeah, right! Dogs, like their owners, are suffering more and more from obesity, and for exactly the same reasons. Fact.

Our current media fascination with the 21st century unhealthy lifestyle suggests that it is even fast-becoming a national sport of its own.

The irony. Television and computers are replacing intense physical activity and the need for the great outdoors; high-calorie snacks are pushing us soft-centred human beings further and further towards that well-stacked dessert trolley in the sky. Even with the emphasis on low-fat foods, we still eat far too much – and find it alarmingly acceptable to feed our pets in the same way – ‘killing them with kindness’.

Q Why the change in format in your shows from sketches to one narrative?

A Our usual format is the long form sketch (ten minutes, generally). We wanted to create a show with quicker scenes, for no other reason than to show that we could. But neither of us much likes sketch shows without a theme, or something to bind the scenes together. Our director suggested using the same format as the play La Ronde, where one character from each scene stays on till the next – a meets b, b meets c etc. That has given this show a natural progression, but it isn't really a single narrative piece. It’s a sketch show masquerading as a play, if you like.

Like in humans, obesity in dogs is a serious medical problem. Fat dogs are more at risk in the operating theatre, more prone to injury, diabetes, and have more stress on their heart, lungs, liver, kidneys, and joints. Surely any owner understands that food is not a substitute for love or attention?

Today's dogs share their biggest problem with their ‘animal-loving’ owners: lack of activity. We’re just too busy, out all day long and tragically, just too tired to play with our own dog to fulfil his exercise needs when we finally get home. So why get a dog in the first place? It would have lived a healthier life at the animal shelter it was ‘rescued’ from. At least he was walked twice a day there.

Anyway, the reason my personal feathers have been ruffled is the recent launch of the first canine obesity medication. That’s right; it’s now okay to allow your dog to get fat, because you can then simply give it this new drug! Brilliant. Has our sad lazy convenience culture literally gone to the dogs? With its long list of delightful side-effects including vomiting, diarrhoea and loss of appetite, anyone who agrees to the use of this drug has clearly failed in the simple art of pet-ownership.

It would be fairer to give up your dog to someone who’s prepared to look after it properly, to give ‘man’s best friend’ its best chance of ‘survival’. After all, preventing a life of further neglect and abuse will ensure that the poor portly pooch may make it to his eighth birthday, and even be allowed to celebrate without the obligatory, calorie-stuffed cake, complete with doggy icing.

If we can’t be a nation of animal-lovers, then at least take steps to show that we care. Increase your exercise regime for yourself and your pet. Cut out tit-bits. Make an appointment to discuss your pets’ weight with your vets. All PETS practices have free nurse clinics just for this.

Please use them – not the drug.

Q What happens if you write something that one of you thinks is hilarious and the other thinks is pants?

A It goes in the show anyway, and the one who hates it gets the joke wrong on purpose until it gets cut. Either that, or he nurses a quiet and helpful resentment.

Q Which new act on the circuit should we watch out for?

A Josie Long won the best newcomer award at Edinburgh last year.

She's a charming, funny and original stand-up who has found her voice, and considerable success, at a depressingly early age.

Laurence And Gus: Next In Line can be seen at Komedia on Thursday 26 March.

Tickets are on sale now.

Comments and enquiries to vicky@thelatest.co.uk

☺

Stand-up wisdom 33: “You can’t do escapology with one eye. I won’t tell you why, you just can’t.” Stuart Goldsmith

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catcher T i m R i c h a r d s o n Freelance Photographer 01273 881832 07977 140002 www.image-catcher.co.uk tim.richardson@image-catcher.co.uk 32a Carlisle Road, Hove, East Sussex BN3 4FS

“Has our sad, lazy convenience culture literally gone to the dogs?”

Any comments for Marc email editorial@thelatest.co.uk

Vote Marc in the Petplan Special Recognition Award The 2007 Petplan Special Recognition Award is looking for your votes to reward the work of first class vets in the media. It is a great way of saying thank you to those who bring a greater understanding of the animal world to the public and promote the health and welfare of our pets. To vote visit the link below before 2 April. Thank you.

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016_LS313_ads

16/3/07

9:39 AM

Page 1

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017_LS313_health

3/14/07

11:48 AM

Page 1

HEALTH

Baby bloom Is trying to get pregnant stressing you out?

Miranda Glavin suggests getting back to nature Although the average age to have a baby in the UK is 29, many more women are having their first child much later than this. But many ‘older’ mothers are then faced with the old adage “you can’t have your cake and eat it” on discovering that, although at 40 they may be in a financially feasible position to have their own family, they’ve missed the boat with their body clock. Or because they’ve left it so late, fertility problems that could’ve been dealt with earlier are now much harder to address. But for these women, and all those facing conception or going to fullterm issues, there is plenty of help out there.

Fertility: the facts Recent NHS statistics do demonstrate a worrying increase in pregnancyand birth-related problems,including a higher mother and infant mortality rate. But it is not all bad news, as evidence suggests, regular unprotected sexual intercourse results in 84 per cent of couples conceiving within one year, and a cumulative 92 per cent within two years. Furthermore, age is not necessarily an immediate precursor to failed pregnancy, with 94 per cent of fertile women aged 35 years, and 77 per cent of those aged 38 years, conceiving within three years of trying. And there are steps you can take to increase the chances of a healthy foetus. Limited drinking and no smoking for women is imperative, and although some drinking in men will not harm the foetusto-be, excessive alcohol intake and smoking is detrimental to semen quality and can impair the developing foetus. It is also important to ensure your BMI (body mass index) is between 19 and 29. Finally, men should be informed that there is an association between elevated scrotal temperature and reduced semen quality – so out with those Y-fronts!

Natural fertility Although birth is essentially a natural process, after being prodded and pricked and hospitalised it can feel anything but. Natural fertility’s approach is that by being in tune with the body and birth as a natural process, and by using a combination of therapies, your chances of conception will increase.

Organisations using this approach include Sussex Natural Fertility and Brighton and Hove Natural Fertility Centre. The former provides programmes designed to: maximise the chances of a natural conception for healthy couples, enhance the chances of a natural conception for those couples already diagnosed with male or female subfertility, and support and maximise the chances of successful conception through IUI or IVF. They take into account issues such as endometriosis and lifestyle factors in women, and stress and toxicity in men. Both organisations then treat these issues with therapies such as nutrition, homeopathy and hypnotherapy as well as yoga which the Natural Fertlity Centre specialises in. This will give you a healthier, relaxed frame of mind – the best mental and physical space in which to conceive and produce a healthy baby.

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See more health tips at wavemagazine.co.uk

Health & fitness TUESDAY 20 Abs Blast With Martin. Fitforall, 6pm, £3 Astanga Yoga All levels. Brighton Buddhist Centre. 12.45–2pm and 6–7.30pm, £6/£4 BE Pilates Mat Class Beg/Improvers. 01273 273074 for info. Back2Balance.

5.45–6.45pm, and 7–8pm, £45 for six weeks Children’s Kungfu Ages 7–11. Cornerstone Community Centre. 4–5pm, £4 Flamenco Dance Lower/Int. The Dance Station. 8.15–9.15pm, £8.50 Flamenco Dance Technique Contact Ana for more info. The Dance Station. 7–8.15pm, £8.50 Hatha Yoga All levels. Info call Sandy: 01273 505433, Unit 4.

9.30–11.00am, £6 Hypnotherapy Free consultations with Peter J Hassell: smoking, anxiety and other issues. 07884 213599 Rev’s Up! Indoor Cycling Fun fitness session at Peacehaven Leisure Centre.

7.45pm (also Mon 7.45pm, Thu 6pm) £4.30 drop-in Yoga and Meditation All levels. Brighton Buddhist Centre. 10–11.30am. £6/£4, (Also same time Fridays)

WEDNESDAY 21 Abs and Backs Dean’s Leisure Centre.

8–8.20pm, £1 Hatha Fusion Yoga The Acupuncture Clinic.

9.30–10.30am, £6 Ki and Aikido Basics Bob: 01273 323315. Brighton Ki Centre. 7–9pm, £6 Low Impact Aerobics Dean’s Leisure Centre.

8–9pm, £4 Open Meditation Evening Call Richard for info: 07796 331167. Bodhi Garden.

7.30–9pm, suggested donation £5 Shaolin Tai Qi – Rou Quan St Mary Magdalen Centre, also same time Monday.

7.15pm–8.15pm, £8, (£25 for all four classes at the centre) Sivananda Yoga Beg/Int. Revitalise. Call Helen 07722 046865. 9.30–10.45am Yoga With Joanne. Coral Health and Fitness. 1.30pm, £3.50 Yoga Drop-in with Jackie Coulson.

Wendy Whatling School of Dance. 9.15–10.45am (also Thu 7.45–8.45pm) Yummymummys Fitforall, 10.30am, £4

THURSDAY 22

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Pre-book with Francesca on 07958 204 211. Wendy Whatling School of Dance.

9.45-10.45am, £54 for 6 weeks Yoga With Jo. Fitforall, 7.15pm, £4

Body Control Pilates Mixed and advanced classes.

Holistic Health Centre.

8–9.15pm, £60 for 6 weeks Brighton Jamyang Group Call Ian for info: 07758 150722, Bodhi Garden. 7.30pm suggested donation £5 Egyptian Belly Dancing Drop-in work out class.

Wendy Whatling. 11–12pm Hatha Yoga Patcham Community Centre.

07986 850029. 9.45–11.15am, £6 Hip Hop/R’n’B Dance Class Peacehaven Leisure Centre.

8pm drop in, £4.30 Mindful Hatha Yoga With Taravajra, call 07985 314181 for more info. Unit 4.

11.30–1pm Pilates The Acupuncture Clinic.

7.45–8.45pm, £45 for six Pilates Beginners mat-based class.

FRIDAY 23 Early Morning Yoga Brighton Buddhist Centre.

8–9am, £5/£3 Fitness Pilates 5-week course at Saltdean Community Centre.

9.30–10.30am and 11–12pm, call 01273 305827 to book Soto Zen Meditation Call for info: 01273 682974.

Bodhi Garden. 8–9.30pm, suggested donation £5 Tai Chi Peacehaven Leisure Centre.

7.30pm drop in, £4.30 Tai Chi The Acupuncture Clinic.

12.30–1.30pm, £6/£5

SATURDAY 24 BE Pilates Mat Class Beg/Improvers. 01273 273074 for info. Coast Chiropractic.

10–11am and 11am–12pm, £45 for six weeks Coretastic!

With James. Fitforall, 10am, £4 Children’s Ki and Aikido For ages 4–7. Brighton Ki Centre, call Bob for info: 01273 323315. 9–9.45am, £2.50 Hatha Yoga (Scaravelli) 90-minute class. Coral Health and Fitness. 12pm, £4.50 Iyengar Yoga Brighton Buddhist Centre.

9.30–10.45, £6/£4 Vinyasa Flow Yoga Info call Tara: 07866 255391.

Revitalise. 10.30am–12pm, £42 for 6 weeks/£8 drop-in

SUNDAY 25 Adult Tap Wendy Whatling School of Dance. Beginners 7–8pm and intermediate 8–9pm Aquarobics Main pool, King Alfred.

10.30am–11.15am, £4.10 Hangover Spin Fitforall, 10am, £4 Women’s Yoga The Acupuncture Clinic. £40 for 6 classes. 11am–12.15pm

MONDAY 26 Chen Tai Chi All levels, Davigdor School.

6–7pm, £7. Info: 07799 097776 Fitness Pilates Drop-in class. Dean’s Leisure Centre. 7.30–8.30pm, £5, (also a 5-week course Tue, 9.30–10.30 and 7.30–8.30pm) Flamenco Dance Beginners. The Dance Station. 7–8.15pm, £8.50 Hatha Yoga Weekly class. The Dharma School. Call 07986 850029.

5.30–6.45pm, £30 for 6 weeks Hatha Yoga (Scaravelli) Coral Health and Fitness.

12pm & 7.10pm, £3.50 Inspiring Yoga All levels. Holistic Health Clinic. 6.15–7.45pm, £7 Children’s Ki and Aikido Ages 8–13. Details call Pippa 07779 780103. Brighton Ki Centre. 5.15–6.15pm, £2.50 Kundalini Yoga For LGBT, Anahata Health Clinic. 7.45pm, £5/£4 Latino Mix With Marta, Fitforall, 6pm, £4 Legs, Bums And Tums Deans Leisure Centre.

5.30–6.30pm and 6.30–7.30pm, £4.

Scaravelli Inspired Yoga With Peta Trousdell at Unit 4.

Call 01273 846722 for more info. 10–11.30am Shaolin Kungfu All levels, Davigdor School.

7–8pm, £7 Tai Chi Chuan Class More info: 07900 193230. All Saints Church Hall, 8pm, £5

Women’s Yoga (Scaravelli) The Acupuncture Clinic.

6.30–8pm, £9 drop-in, £32 for 4

DIRECTORY The Acupuncture Clinic 143 Portland Road, Hove 01273 722422 All Saints Church Hall Eaton Road, Hove Ian Kendall: 07900 193230 www.ik-taichi.com Anahata Health Clinic 119–120 Edward Street, Kemp Town. 01273 698687f Back2Balance 35 Goldstone Villas, Hove 01273 206 868 Bodhi Garden Centre 7 Ship St Gardens, Brighton Call Richard 07796 331167 Brighthelm Community Centre North Road, Brighton Brighton Buddhist Centre 17 Tichborne Street, Brighton 01273 772090 Brighton Ki Centre 12 Queens Square, Brighton Barry: 07854 389606 Brighton Natural Health Centre Regent Street, Brighton 01273 600010 Brighton Reiki Centre Viaduct Road, Brighton 07968 982136 Coast Chiropractic 198 Church Road, Hove 01273 321144 Coral Health And Fitness Orchard Road, Hove 01273 731262 Cornerstone Community Centre Church Road, Hove The Dance Station Unit 4, 57 North Street, Portslade. 01273 419977 Davigdor Infants School Somerhill Road, Hove Bernie: 07799 097776 Dean’s Leisure Centre Longhill School Karen: 01273 305827 The Dharma School Ladies Mile Road, Patcham Diamond Way Buddhist Centre Montpelier Road, Brighton Ingrid: 07736 061108 Dorothy Stringer Sports Complex Loder Road, Brighton. Info: 07895 066321 Fitforall Unit 1, Portland Road Trading Estate, Hove. 01273 415515 Holistic Health Clinic 53 Beaconsfield Rd, Brighton 01273 696295 Johnson Page Healthcare Chiropractic and Medical Acupuncture, 15 Ship Street 01273 724777 King Alfred Leisure Centre Kingsway, Hove 01273 290290 Komaja Centre 21a Upper Market Street, Hove. Cela: 01273 771472 Leach Court Eastern Road, Brighton. Ian Kendall: 07900 193230 More Bar/Restaurant 98 Trafalger Street, Brighton 07717 584738 Patcham Community Centre Ladies Mile Road, Patcham Peacehaven Leisure Centre Greenwich Way, Peacehaven 01273 588858 Revitalise (Planet Janet) 86 Church Road, Hove 01273 738389 St Mary Magdalen Community Centre 55 Upper North St, Brighton.

01273 676992 Unit 4 20–26 Roundhill St, Brighton Wendy Whatling School of Dance Unit 11a Dyke Road Mews, Brighton. wendywhat ling@btconnect.com

List for FREE in this section.

Email health events to editorial@thelatest.co.uk with the date, place, time and cost

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216 Church Road, Hove

10% discount on take away Opening hours: 12.00pm-2.30pm and 6.00pm-11.30pm Offers exclude bank holidays

01273 722216 01273 770704

FANTASTIC PUB LUNCHES For more information about how you can promote your pub in our forthcoming fantastic pub lunches feature, call Kate on 01273 818150

THE MOST ORIGINAL INDIAN CUISINE IN SUSSEX

SPECIAL OFFER! Buy one main course, get the 2nd one FREE! Sunday–Thursday (Excluding Bank Holidays) Bring this advert or mention when booking 70/71 Ship Street, Brighton 01273 329405 / 747109 Offer valid until 30.04.07 Not to be used in conjunction with any other offer 18 latest 7

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ANDREW KAY’S FOOD&DRINK

Fare game

Sponsored by Mr L followed with Ashdown Forest venison loin with rosti, roast shallots with a juniper jus. The venison was amazing, dark and musky, meltingly tender and full of flavour. The shallots, big banana ones, glistened and were the perfect side of burnt as they should be. The rosti we both thought was a bit too crisp, then revised our thought as the texture added an air of game chips to the dish. The jus was sticky and held the whole together.

I chose rump of Romney Marsh lamb with roast squash, Swiss chard and a lentil jus. What a dish – more than generous in size with thick slices of pink lamb that the chef had taken to the very edge of rareness to achieve a wonderfull crisp skin and fine layer of sweet fat. The fat and skin on good lamb is sublime and I found myself saving it till last. The roast squash was creamy and sweet, and the chard perfect, bitter in contrast. My jus, different from Mr L’s, was also sticky but dotted with Puy lentils. I really didn’t want it to end but that was all I could manage.

Mr L, however, finished with a lemon polenta cake with lemon syrup and marscapone, a good slice with a nice puddle of sauce strewn with candied lemon zest and topped with the cheese. I was too full to even try.

We had a glass of red each, a light house wine that did the job, and a bottle of still water. The bill came to about £30 each which, while hardly being cheap, was to my mind incredibly good value. Prime ingredients, mainly local, were treated with care and pride. A kitchen that can roast meats this precisely is to be applauded. I am so tired of roast meats that taste simply of burnt roasting tin.

You can stay at the Griffin, too, with rooms starting at £80 Sunday to Thursday and some topping out at £130 at the weekend, but all including breakfast, which if lunch is anything to go by promises to be excellent. I think that I thought that Fletching was miles away from Brighton but it’s only a stone’s throw, and a stone well worth throwing.

The Griffin Inn, Fletching, Near Uckfield. Call 01825 722890 or www.thegriffininn.co.uk

Andrew Kay, in shame, finally makes his way to The Griffin Inn in Fletching As I write this, the first and last pubs that I legally drank in were both called The Griffin Inn. The first was when I was 18 – it was my birthday and before my party (fancy dress of course). I went to the pub for the first legal time, the local where my Aunty Marie, who had a glass eye, was a barmaid. I caused a stir for two reasons, the first for announcing it was my 18th birthday when I had been drinking in there for some time, and the second because I was dressed as Shirley Temple. Don’t ask.

On Saturday I was far more conventionally dressed when I called Mr L and invited him to spend a day in the country. ‘‘Ditch the Prada,’’ I said, “and I’ll lend you a pair of wellies.” He did his best but still looked pretty smart where as I look liked more like Shirley Crabtree these days than Temple. We took the dog for a long and very muddy walk, bought eggs at the roadside and looked at antiques before pulling into the carpark at the Griffin in Fletching.

Passionate about property, fanatical about food 59 Church Road, Hove 01273 735237 www.callaways.co.uk

‘‘I think that I thought that Fletching was miles away from Brighton but it’s only a stone’s throw, and a stone well worth throwing’’ I am ashamed to say that in nearly 12 years of writing this column I have only just made it to the Griffin, despite it being so famously good. I have popped in for a Bloody Mary before but never to dine. We nipped into the Ditchling Food Company first and bought a few Scotch eggs, the ones I raved about last autumn, and some excellent Wensleydale cheese, which gave me a Wallace and Gromit moment – although which of us was which is hard to tell.

Back at the Griffin we went to the bar, ordered Bloody Marys and settled down to read a huge blackboard menu in front of a roaring fire.

Mr L had been before and was known, so he asked if there was any chance of a table in the dining room and luckily his influence worked.

Before long we were sat at a large round table with some excellent homemade foccacia and rich olive oil.

The dining room sells the same food as the bar but without the lowerpriced pubby dishes. It was an easy choice for me to start – razor clams.

How often do you see them on a menu? I eat them in Spain where they tend to do that Spanish thing of slowly braising them in a tomato and garlic sauce. Here they had steamed them with chilli and garlic with parsley. God they were good, sweet and meaty, and filling too. Lay three side by side and they are about the size of a steak; four would be too many. I called for a spoon as the broth was too good to waste. Mr L had scallops with a chorizo and coriander relish and caramelised lime. It was gone before I could click the camera. I did get a taste and they were great, really sweet and perfectly, but barely, cooked.

New Exciting Menus Dinner Menu (3 course) £25.00 Sunday to Thursday 6pm till close ~~~~~

Lunch Menu (2 course) £11.95 Sunday to Friday 12pm to 5pm Or choose from our à la Carte menu ~~~~~ Please visit our web site to view menus

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FOOD & DRINK

latest hot

The Gourmet Fish & Chip Company

The Terraces Bar, Grill and Dining Room

LIST

The Gourmet Fish and Chip Company at Brighton Marina has taken the dish into the 21st century. Diners can enjoy fantastic top-grade fish and chips in a trendy diner environment and even enjoy a beer while they wait for their takeaway order. Check out the gourmet fish platter and lunch-time specials. The restaurant is located on the ground-floor level of the waterfront and is open seven days a week. Fully licensed.

The Walk of Fame, 18 Waterfront, Brighton Marina, 01273 670701 www.gourmetfishandchipcompany.com

Terraces bar and grill offers customers a relaxed approach to drinking, eating and hospitality. The lower level is available for private parties, wedding receptions, corporate events, Christmas parties, formal dinners or product launches. Whatever you want, you can be sure of an experience as consistently satisfying as the breathtaking views across Brighton seafront.

Madeira Drive, Brighton, 01273 570526, www.the-terraces.co.uk

RESTAURANTS & BARS

RESTAURANTS BRITISH AND MODERN EUROPEAN Bardsley’s Probably Brighton’s most popular fish and chip shop and restaurant with a large loyal clientele. Totally traditional and family-run with all your favourites, but also an excellent blackboard of daily fish specials.

BYO with no corkage charge, they’re open for lunch and dinner Tuesday to Saturday and it’s also a great party venue. There are massive fish platters and good seasonal seafood. Fish can be fried, grilled or poached, plus vegetarian choices.

22–23a Baker Street, Brighton, 01273 681256

Blanch House The restaurant at Blanch House is an inhouse affair. All involved are dedicated to excellence in food, service and wines but with no pretensions. You can sit back and take pleasure in the relaxed atmosphere of dinner at your best friend’s house while enjoying innovative food, attentive and personal service, and superb wine and cocktail lists. The menu changes with the seasons and availability to ensure that only the freshest high-quality produce is used.

Meat, dairy products and other ingredients are locally sourced and organic where possible. Fish is from the local day boats when available.

17 Atlingworth Street, Brighton, 01273 603504, www.blanchhouse.co.uk

Café Belge Café Belge offers award-winning food (Café Belge Eastbourne received a gold star for food from the prestigious Harden’s Guide 2006) – 50 ways to eat a fresh mussel, salmon fishcakes, award-winning 12” wild boar and beer sausage, fresh sea bass, steak Béarnaise, Toblerone fondue, Belgian waffles – just to give you an insight into what to expect. They also stock more than 100 beers all served in their own glasses, from light and delicious fruit beers to Trapist Monk beers to Belgian Guinness as well as a fine wine list.

64 Kings Rd (corner of West St & seafront), 01273 733290, www.cafebelge.co.uk

The Coach House Friendly restaurant bar in the city centre serving an excellent range of hearty homecooked food, separate evening and lunch menus, and always a selection of roasts on Sunday. Great mussels, steaks, soups and a good wine list. In the winter a central open fire roars, in summer people soak up the late sun on the pretty terrace. The warm atmosphere and good value pricing make this a popular local haunt.

59 Middle Street, Brighton, 01273 719000 www.coachhousebrighton.com

New Steine Bistro Cosy French bistro with regular art exhibitions creating the perfect setting for the appreciation of traditional homemade French cuisine either with friends or for a romantic night out. A hidden gem in the heart of Kemp Town, and very reasonable too! With its daily evening menu at £10.50 weekdays and £14.50 Friday and Saturday.

A la carte menu Tuesday to Saturday 6pm to 10pm for last orders. Available for all celebrations and party bookings with taylor-made menu to your needs including live entertainment.

12a New Steine, Brighton, 01273 681546 reservation@newsteinehotel.com www.newsteinehotel.com

Polar Bar East Polar Bar East is pleased to introduce their new Scottish-based winter menu. This is a style of food we southerners are not exactly familiar with, but Rob and Nolan from the Polar are confident it’s going to be a hit with not only the locals but also with new customers. It’s not surprising considering it’s tipped by celebrity chef Gordon Ramsey as the new food of 2007.

Yes, this so-called peasant food is growing in stature just as many other so called working-class foods have done during the recent years. Its nutritious and wholesome quantity assures that there’s a sense of home in this food. All the meat is supplied by the premium quality butchers Brampton’s of Kemp Town. What to expect – Scots beef, tatties, soups, stews and, of course, haggis. Prices start from £4.

8 St George’s Road, Kemp Town, Brighton, 01273 683334

Ruby Tate’s Situated at the heart of cosmopolitan Kemp Town, Ruby Tate’s oyster and champagne bar really is the pearl of Brighton. From moules marinière to lobster Thermidor, this is a paradise for seafood lovers. The restaurant’s stylish décor and trademark friendly service ensure that diners enjoy the gourmet food and fine champagne in a relaxed, informal atmosphere.

40 St James’s Street, Brighton, 01273 693251

Sevendials Restaurant A smart restaurant in so many ways, excellent food and a sensible variety of menus in chic surroundings. Chef Sam runs a team of food-lovers who deliver time after time, from a simple lunch to a full à la carte dinner. Cooking reflects the seasons rather than fashion, and quality is paramount, with great locally caught fish, game in season and desserts that are a delight plus a wine list that is full of treats without being expensive too. Make the most of the terrace while the weather is warm or the private dining room for a treat.

1 Buckingham Place, Brighton, 01273 885555 www.sevendialsrestaurant.co.uk

INDIAN Nooris Indian Cuisine One of Brighton’s longest-standing Indian restaurants and justifiably so. Smart service and a menu that, as well as offering all our favourite dishes, has some interesting and unusual dishes on offer.

Great central location just off the seafront.

Portions are on the very generous side so order carefully. We have always been particularly impressed by the vegetarian menu, especially the malai kupta. Excellent breads and side dishes too. £6.95 for a twocourse meal and £11.95 for a three-course meal with wine.

70 Ship Street, Brighton 01273 329405

ITALIAN Donatello The flagship venue of this local family-run business serving excellent-value Italian food in stylish and spotless surroundings. It is popular with locals in the week but at the weekend it draws an audience from London. There are brilliant-value meal deals on blackboards outside – two courses £6.95, three £8.95 – as well as à la carte. The haunt of celebs in season from soap stars to politicos. Fun, friendly and fabulous value.

Brighton Place, Brighton, 01273 775477, www.donatello.co.uk

Fat Leo Supposedly the budget branch of the Donatello stable but you’d be hard-pressed to see why. Once again, quality family dining in the Italian mould but a little less expensive. Very popular with students and families with young children, Fat Leo has trendy interiors, including the toilets, and a menu that is utterly affordable with the company’s signature set-price boards proclaiming any two courses £5.95, any three courses £7.95.

16–17 Market Street, Brighton, 01273 325135

LATIN AMERICAN Las Iguanas Brazilian cooking has come to town and with it all the fun of the caipirinha. Spicy, fun and inexpensive, this Latin newcomer is already proving popular, especially the two-for-one cocktail deals and an excellent £7 two-course lunch menu. Whacky interiors and a cool cocktail bar give the place a carnival feel all the time and the staff are friendly and fun too. If you don’t know what cachaca is, then it’s time to find out.

7–8 Jubilee Street, Brighton, 01273 573550, www.iguanas.co.uk

PREMIUM THAI TAKE AWAY Chokdee Possibly the first of its kind, this premium take-away offers fantastic-quality Thai food to your door if you use the home-delivery service or to take away if you are passing.

You can eat in too, as there is a stylish dining area. Counter service does away with additional service charges, so you can enjoy Thai food as often as you like without the fuss. At Chokdee it’s the food that’s the thing. Foodies – start the queue!

98 Goldstone Villas, Hove, 01273 720370, open every day (12pm–3pm and 5pm–11pm)

SOUTH EAST ASIAN Bali Brasserie Located in a 1960s mansion block, this very popular Indonesian-Malaysian restaurant has a rijsttafel buffet dining menu at £16.95 with a wide and generous range of dishes that are constantly replenished. There is also an à la carte menu. Nice original retro décor, bamboo and cane, pink and gilt, with lots of oriental puppets, jazz playing rather than pop and a friendly atmosphere. Very Simon Templar.

KIngsway Court, First Avenue, Hove, 01273 323810, 12-2pm, 6.30-10.30pm (till 11pm Friday and Saturday)

Melati This newly refurbished restaurant and bar has a touch of class about it and serves delicious Indonesian, Malaysian and Singaporean food and bar snacks. The owners bring their successful formula from their restaurant in the West End of London and the long list of authentic dishes on the menu leaves you spoilt for choice.

Corner of Lansdowne Place and Western Road, Hove, 01273 775565

THAI Chokdee Offering quality Thai food in a café style, with a takeaway option as well, this restaurant is great news for Hove commuters on their way home. An experienced team delivers hot and fiery, to mild and delicate dishes. Each order is freshly made using authentic Thai ingredients. It serves a good selection of stir-fries and real Thai green and red curries, with excellent seafood and speciality fish dishes. Newly refurbished, it is boldly decorated in dark browns and reds, which highlight the colourful diversity of Thai food. During the morning, go for teas and coffee, with lunch from 12 noon.

98 Goldstone Villas, Hove, 01273 720370, open every day, 12–3pm, 5– 11pm

Sawadee The Thai restaurant people love, for parties and celebrations and because they always give the best of times. And why not; this well-priced restaurant repeatedly pleases with dishes we have all grown to love, and some new ones too. We were impressed by the use of authentic ingredients such as pea aubergines where others use peas.

Lots of fish dishes too with bass and pomfret and a great sliced beef salad.

87 St James’s Street, Brighton, 01273 624233, www.sawadeethai.co.uk

To have an entry in the latest hot list call 01273 818150 20 latest 7

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FOOD & DRINK VEGETARIAN Iydea Vegetarian Cafeteria If it’s a great value, fresh, tasty and quick lunch you’re after, you’ve found it! This new express vegetarian cafeteria dishes up a tasty selection of homemade, fresh, healthy world food at great prices. With its refreshingly bright, clean, simple interior and all the freshly prepared food on display for you to choose from, this new gem is going to be a food lovers’ hit for sure 17 Kensington Gardens, North Laine, Brighton, 01273 667992

Revitalise (formerly Planet Janet) This popular and stylish Hove café restaurant offers delicious healthy hot and cold food in combination with being an excellent centre for therapies, treatments and classes. Healthy breakfasts, chunky sandwiches, soups, main meals, jacket potatoes and salads form the core of the menu. Freshly pressed fruit and vegetable juices in delicious revitalising combos, delicious fair-trade teas and coffee, vegan and gluten-free options. Open seven days a week, families welcome. You can eat for less than a fiver!

86 Church Road, Hove, 01273 738389, www.revitalise-u.com

BARS & PUBS The Bell

Blanch House The award-winning cocktail bar is located on the ground floor of the five-storey building and offers an eclectic range of superbly made cocktails. The owner, Chris Edwardes, has managed many renowned bars, restaurants and clubs in London, including the Groucho Club, The Pharmacy, as well as opening the Jazz Café, The Atlantic, and the Ge Club for Conran. His cocktail skills have been described as ’legendary’ by those in the know and with over 30 years’ experience in the industry it was only a matter of time before he opened his own quality venue.

17 Atlingworth Street, Brighton, 01273 603504, www.blanchhouse.co.uk

A traditional community boozer with a prime location in Poets Corner, Hove. The lively public bar contains large-screen TVs with Sky Sports and Prem Plus and a leaguestandard pool table, while the saloon bar offers quality Harvey’s ales and comfortable seating. Freshly prepared lunchtime food is served daily. An exclusive function room is available for small parties or meetings.

33 Montgomery Street, Hove, 01273 272212

GinGin Sophisticated cocktail chic at this stylish St James’s Street bar. Try one of the head barman’s innovative cocktails using unusual mixes and fresh herbs. Cool interiors and a warm and friendly atmosphere, which, for once in a city that worships youth, is not ageist.

St James’s Street, Kemp Town, Brighton, 01273 671119

The Greene Room This fantastic contemporary bar is found just above the Cricketers – the oldest pub in Brighton. The Greene Room plays host to a large cocktail and wine list to be enjoyed in a relaxed and comfortable environment.

Three adjoining rooms make it a perfect venue for gatherings and parties in the heart of Brighton. Available for private hire.

Above The Cricketers, Black Lion Street, Brighton, 01273 329472

The Hop Poles Great central pub with off-the-wall décor and a loyal clientele of the city’s fashionable best. A fantastic menu of wellpriced food means it gets very busy and seats are at a premium, even in winter on the heated terrace, so get there early.

Excellent free-range meat is specially sourced, while vegetarians are well catered for too.

13 Middle Street, Brighton, 01273 710444

Koba Koba hosts a happy hour between 5pm and 7pm all week. Three bars over three floors with a dedicated team of mixologists. This venue stands as a flagship of quality in Brighton and has been nominated in the top ten bars/clubs in the UK by The Independent. Good beers, a sensible wine list and, of course, champagne for those special occasions or just the sheer love of it. The perfect venue for a private party or an atmospheric night out. Live music on Thursdays, DJs on the weekend. For free K-list membership go to the website.

135 Western Road, Brighton, 01273 720059, www.kobauk.com

Preston Park Tavern This stunning new gastro-pub is situated on Havelock Road in Fiveways. Fresh, locally sourced food is served seven days a week from the open-plan kitchen. A separate children’s menu is available in this totally non-smoking venue. It boasts a great range of real ales and lagers as well as a 17 bin wine list, all served by the glass or bottle.

88 Havelock Road, Brighton, 01273 542271

The Eagle

The Shakespeare’s Head

Great atmosphere, warm welcome, good beer and above all, great food from this gastropub. Hearty, modern food inspired by global cuisine and sensibly priced – you won’t go home hungry or broke. Right in the heart of the North Laine, an excellent place for lunch or dinner. Voted Latest 7 Pub Of The Year.

125 Gloucester Road, Brighton, 01273 607765

Set in the heart of Brighton’s city centre, this traditional back street pub offers something for everyone. Fresh food at lunchtime complements a wide variety of beers, ales and wines. For sport lovers the pub has a large screen TV showing Sky Sports and Prem Plus and a brand-new pool table. This central pub boasts a function room which can hired for exclusive use.

1 Spring Street, Brighton, 01273 204680

What’s cooking this week?

Quick And Easy Tapas Silvana Franco This glossy new recipe book from Southwater catches the eye with vibrant colours and over 280 images packed into its 96 pages. A thin, softback edition, Quick And Easy Tapas can be tucked away on a bookshelf or in the kitchen drawer until it is needed at just a moment’s notice.

To impress friends, invite them round for drinks and prepare tapas with help from Silvana Franco’s great new recipe book. With a little background information into the world of tapas (which originated in Andalucia before spreading to major European cities and beyond), there is also a great section on essential ingredients and a Spanish glossary too.

This is followed by 70 finger foods and bites which are easily prepared; from cold tapas to seafood, and meat and vegetarian options. Ideal for any time of year, accompany drinks with some great homemade snacks courtesy of these new recipes.

Zara Friend

Spicy meatballs Ingredients 115g/4oz fresh spicy sausages 115g/4oz minced beef 2 shallots, finely chopped 2 garlic cloves, finely chopped 75g/3oz/11⁄2 cups fresh white breadcrumbs 1 egg, beaten

30ml/2tbsp chopped fresh parsley, plus extra to garnish Salt and freshly ground black pepper 15ml/1tbsp olive oil Tabasco sauce or other hot chilli sauce, to serve Makes 18 meatballs

1. Remove the skins from the sausages and place the sausage meat in a small mixing bowl.

Image: Patrick McLeavey

This friendly, traditional pub reopened its doors at the end of last year after having undergone extensive refurbishment and is now under new ownership. Tucked away off Blatchington Road, it already has a name for itself for its great value food, freshly made every day from locally sourced products, including fantastic roasts on Sundays. The pub is child friendly and there’s often something extra going on from quiz nights to live music. There’s also a function room available to hire. If that’s not enough, they also have a three-hour happy hour every Monday to Friday from 4pm-7pm.

15-17 Belfast Street, Hove, 01273 770773

The Eclipse

2. Add the minced beef, shallots, garlic, breadcrumbs, egg and parsley, with plenty of salt and pepper. Mix well, then shape into 18 small balls.

3. Heat the olive oil in a large frying pan and cook the meatballs, in batches if necessary, for about 15–20 minutes, stirring regularly until evenly browned and cooked through.

4. Transfer the meatballs to a warm plate and sprinkle with chopped parsley. Serve with chilli sauce. Offer cocktail sticks for spearing.

Quick And Easy Tapas by Silvana Franco, £4.99, ISBN-1-84476-432-X, is published by Southwater Books (an imprint of Anness Publishing Ltd)

The Laughing Onion Restaurant Jean-Jacques Jordane ‘Sings Paris’ Open every other Saturday Available for private parties Bookings only – 3 Courses £17.95 Meals must be pre-ordered with deposit (adults only)

80 St George’s Road, Kemp Town

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FILM www.odeon.co.uk

0871 224 4007 Tuesday 20 BECOMING JANE (PG) 11.45, 2.30, 5.15, 8.00 FACTORY GIRL (15) 12.15, 2.30, 4.45, 7.00, 9.15 GHOST RIDER (12A) 12.15, 3.00, 5.45 HOT FUZZ (15) 11.30, 2.15, 5.15, 8.15, NORBIT (12A) 1.00, 3.30, 6.00, 8.30 PREMONITION (12A) 11.45, 2.00, 4.30, 7.00, 9.15 THE NUMBER 23 (15) 12.30, 3.15, 6.00, 8.45 WILD HOGS (12A) 1.00, 3.30, 6.15, 8.30 DIRECTOR’S CHAIR: MARIE ANTOINETTE (12A) 8.30

Wednesday 21

FACTORY GIRL (15) 12.15, 2.30, 4.45, 7.00, 9.15 GHOST RIDER (12A) 12.15, 3.00, 5.45, 8.30 HOT FUZZ (15) 11.30, 2.15, 5.15, 8.15, NORBIT (12A) 1.00, 3.30, 6.00, 8.30 OUTLAW (18) 3.30, 8.30 PREMONITION (12A) 11.45, 2.00, 4.30, 7.00, 9.15 THE ILLUSIONIST (PG) 12.45, 6.00 THE NUMBER 23 (15) 12.30, 3.15, 6.00, 8.45 SENIOR SCREEN: THE PRESTIGE (12A) 10.30am

Films showing Friday 23–Monday 26

BECOMING JANE (PG) 11.45, 2.30, 5.15, 8.00 FACTORY GIRL (15) 12.15, 2.30, 4.45, 7.00, 9.15 GHOST RIDER (12A) 12.15, 3.00, 8.30 HOT FUZZ (15) 11.30, 2.15, 5.15, 8.15, NORBIT (12A) 1.00, 3.30, 6.00, 8.30 OUTLAW (18) 3.30, 8.30 PREMONITION (12A) 11.45, 2.00, 4.30, 7.00, 9.15 THE ILLUSIONIST (PG) 12.45, 6.00 THE NUMBER 23 (15) 12.30, 3.15, 6.00, 8.45

300 (15) BECOMING JANE (PG) FACTORY GIRL (15) GHOST RIDER (12A) HOT FUZZ (15) NORBIT (12A) OUTLAW (18) PREMONITION (12A) THE ILLUSIONIST (PG) THE NUMBER 23 (15)

Thursday 22

PLEASE CHECK WITH CINEMA FOR CONFIRMATION OF FILMS SHOWING FROM FRIDAY

300 (15) 10.30, 1.00, 3.30, 6.00, 8.30 BECOMING JANE (PG) 11.45, 2.30, 5.15, 8.00

www.picturehouses.co.uk

01273 626261 Tuesday 20

Saturday 24

HOT FUZZ (15) 4.00, 9.00 THE ILLUSIONIST (PG) 1,30, 6.30

AFTER THE WEDDING (15) 3.30 MET.OPERA: THE BARBER OF SEVILLE (LIVE SCREENING) 6.30pm THE FAMILY FRIEND (15) 1,30 KID’S CLUB: THE IRON GIANT (U) 11.00am

Wednesday 21 BIG SCREAM: MISS POTTER (PG) 11.00am HOT FUZZ (15) 4.00, 9.00 THE ILLUSIONIST (PG) 1,30, 6.30

Thursday 22 HOT FUZZ (15) 4.00, 9.00 THE ILLUSIONIST (PG) 1,30, 6.30

Friday 23 AFTER THE WEDDING (15) 3.30, 9.15 THE FAMILY FRIEND (15) 1,30, 6.30 LATE SHOW: THE DEVIL’S BACKBONE (15) 11.30pm

Sunday 25 AFTER THE WEDDING (15) 4.00, 9..00 THE FAMILY FRIEND (15) 1,30, 6.30

Monday 26 AFTER THE WEDDING (15) 4.00, 9.00 THE FAMILY FRIEND (15) 1,30, 6.30

www.cineworld.co.uk

01273 818094 Tuesday 20

Thursday 22

BECOMING JANE (PG) 12.20, 3.10, 5.50, 8.30 CHARLOTTE’S WEB (U) 12.50 FACTORY GIRL (15) 12.10, 2.30, 5.00, 7.10, 9.20 GHOST RIDER (12A) 1.10, 3.40, 6.10, 8.40 HOLLYWOODLAND (15) 11.00am HOT FUZZ (15) 12.30, 3.15, 6.00, 8.50 NORBIT (12A)1.40, 4.05, 6.30, 9.00 OUTLAW (18) 2.00, 4.30, 7.00, 9.30 PREMONITION (12A) 11.50, 2.10, 4.30, 6.45, 9.10 THE ILLUSIONIST (PG) 3.00, 5.40, 8.20

300 (15) 11.20, 1.50, 4.20, 6.50, 9.15 BECOMING JANE (PG) 12.20, 3.10, 5.50, 8.30 FACTORY GIRL (15) 12.10, 2.30, 5.00, 7.10, 9.20 GHOST RIDER (12A) 1.10, 3.40, 6.10, 8.40 HOT FUZZ (15) 12.30, 3.15, 6.00, 8.50 NORBIT (12A)1.40, 4.05, 6.30, 9.00 OUTLAW (18) 2.00, 4.30, 7.00, 9.30 PREMONITION (12A) 11.50, 2.10, 4.30, 6.45, 9.10

Wednesday 21 BECOMING JANE (PG) 12.20, 3.10, 5.50, 8.30 CHARLOTTE’S WEB (U) 12.50 FACTORY GIRL (15) 12.10, 2.30, 5.00, 7.10, 9.20 GHOST RIDER (12A) 1.10, 3.40, 6.10, 8.40 HOT FUZZ (15) 12.30, 3.15, 6.00, 8.50 NORBIT (12A)1.40, 4.05, 6.30, 9.00 OUTLAW (18) 2.00, 4.30, 7.00, 9.30 PREMONITION (12A) 11.50, 2.10, 4.30, 6.45, 9.10 THE ILLUSIONIST (PG) 3.00, 5.40, 8.20 THE PLANET (U) 8.00

Films showing Friday 23–Monday 26 300 (15) BECOMING JANE (PG) FACTORY GIRL (15) GHOST RIDER (12A) HOT FUZZ (15) NORBIT (12A) OUTLAW (18) PREMONITION (12A) PLEASE CHECK WITH CINEMA FOR CONFIRMATION OF FILMS SHOWING FROM FRIDAY

Worthing Cinema

01903 206206 www.worthingtheatres.co.uk please call for times

Tues 20-22

Fri 23–24

MISS POTTER (PG)

ROCKY BALBOA (12A)

Fri 23–26

Sat 24-Mon 26

NOTES ON A SCANDAL (15)

BLOOD DIAMOND (15)

22 latest 7

Also showing...

A quick look at all this week’s releases Becoming Jane (PG) Dir: Julian Jarrold An oddly saccharine biopic of Jane Austen that chooses to focus on her youth just prior to her literary fame. Anne Hathaway struggles to bring anything but frothy sentimentalism to the role of a young Austen. The script, littered with cloying melodrama, fails to do justice to the subject at hand. (2/5) Showing at Cineworld and Odeon

Notes On A Scandal (15) Dir: Richard Eyre Adapted from the superb Zoe Heller novel this film tells the story of teacher Cate Blanchett who enters into an affair with a pupil.

Excellent performances from all with a brittle and raw display from Judi Dench. At times genuinely unnerving this is desperate and ruthless display of love gone sour. (4/5) Showing at Worthing from 23 March

Blood Diamond (15) Dir: Edward Zwick Set against the backdrop of the civil war in 1990s Sierra Leone, Blood Diamond is the story of South African ex-soldier Danny Archer and Mende fisherman Solomon Vandy. (3/5) Showing at Worthing from 24 March

Outlaw (18) Dir: Nick Love This gritty brute of a film follows Sean Bean as he returns from combat in Iraq to an England awash with crime. He quickly rounds up a vigilante group of disaffected angry young men to dish out justice. Coming off like The Daily Mail with added gore this is a thrilling but often nasty offering. (2/5) Showing at Cineworld and Odeon

Charlotte’s Web (U) Dir: Gary Winick A new adaptation of EB White’s classic story sees Dakota Fanning (of War Of The Worlds fame) star alongside the voice talents of Julia Roberts and Oprah Winfrey. A faithful rendering but sickly sweet. (3/5) Showing at Cineworld Ghost Rider (12A) Dir: Mark Steven Johnson Another Marvel big screen adaptation; another sloppy mess. Nicholas Cage plays stunt motorcyclist Johnny Blaze who gives up his soul to become a hellblazing vigilante in the employ of the devil. It may indeed be big, brash and bold but it’s also blatantly been in production hell for some time and feels dated and tired. (2/5) Showing at Cineworld and Odeon Hollywoodland (15) Dir: Allen Coulter Ben Affleck dons the superman cape in this slick tale of original television Superman George Reeves. Tragic but heartfelt, this is standard Hollywood fare. (2/5) Showing at Cineworld on 20 March Hot Fuzz (15) Dir: Edgar Wright Superb new offering from the Shaun of the Dead crew. This time it’s the turn of the local bobby to get the comic actioner treatment.

The last half hour may struggle to sustain the initial brilliance displayed but this is still a cut above the usual comic fare. (4/5) Showing at Cineworld, Odeon and Duke Of Yorks Marie Antoinette (12A) Dir: Sofia Coppola The new film from Lost In Translation director Coppola sees her tackle the French aristocracy in typical postmodern fashion. Kirsten Dunst plays the doomed Queen amidst a plethora of new romantic songs, opulent cinematography and mountains of cake. Intoxicating for sure but somewhat pithy and flat. (3/5) Showing at Odeon on 20 March Miss Potter (PG) Dir: Chris Noonan A soft-centred biopic of children’s author Beatrix Potter. Renée Zellweger plays Potter with another pristine English accent. Ewan McGregor, with a truly impressive moustache, stars as Potter’s love interest Norman Warne.

(2/5) Showing at Worthing Norbit (12A) Dir: Brian Robbins This mad, chaotic and often excrutiating comic farce stars Eddie Murphy in three roles.

Coming off like Big Momma’s House only, dare I say it, with even less laughs, this is unadulterated cinematic slush: loud, fat, crude and vile. (2/5) Showing at Cineworld and Odeon

Rocky Balboa (12A) Dir: Sylvester Stallone Rocky comes back for one last fight in what is an often surprising film. Stallone may be into his sixth decade but he invests a decent amount of thrills into a tired conceit. (2/5) Showing at Worthing from 23 March The Devil’s Backbone (15) Dir: Guillermo Del Toro An extraordinarily rich tapestry detailing a boy’s journey into the dark heart of fascist Spain. A strong second feature from Del Toro but the style does cloud the narrative. (3/5) Showing at Duke Of Yorks on 23 March The Illusionist (PG) Dir: Neil Burger Set in turn of the century Vienna, Edward Norton plays a magician intent on securing the love of a woman well above his social standing. Rufus Sewell and Paul Giammati add able support while Jessica Biel plays the love interest. (3/5) Showing at Odeon and Cineworld The Iron Giant (U) Dir: Brad Bird One of the smartest and most adult kiddies flicks around, The Iron Giant is a worthy adaptation of the Ted Hughes novel. This was the film Brad Bird made before going on to do the excellent The Incredibles for Pixar. (4/5) Showing at Duke Of Yorks on 24 March The Number 23 (15) Dir: Joel Schumacher Paranoia gets the MTV treatment in this flashy thriller. Jim Carrey plays a man who becomes obsessed with the number 23. The premise may be quirky but the film remains a trashy example of Schumacher’s wildly egotistical and debauched world view. (2/5) Showing at Odeon The Planet (U) Dir: Johan Söderberg & Michael Stenberg A worthy addition to the canon of environmental documentaries this is a insightful but dry look at global warming. (3/5) Showing at Cineworld on 21 March The Prestige (12A) Dir: Christopher Nolan A tricky and smart tale of rival magicians in Victorian England. Worth admission for the sight of a restrained David Bowie. (3/5) Showing at Odeon on 22 March Wild Hogs (12A) Dir: Walt Becker A group of bikers hit the open road in search of adventure. John Travolta, Tim Allen, William H. Macy and Martin Lawrence star in an often baffling but occasionally hilarious film. (3/5) Showing at Odeon on 20 March

023_LS313_film column

3/15/07

12:39 PM

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FILM

L7 lowdown Looking back in...

New releases reviewed

7 Selects

300 (15) Director: Zack Snyder Based on Frank Miller's graphic novel of the same name, 300 concerns the 480 BC Battle of Thermopylae in which 300 Spartan soldiers fought a Persian army well in excess of 100,000. Snyder has adapted the exhilarating comic touch of Miller and stayed true to the harsh and often extremely brutal violence at the heart of the comic. Gerard Butler stars as King Leonidas of Sparta and is suitably buff. More of a homoerotic bloodfest than a film in the strictest sense, the special effects are all-encompassing and the visuals flit between the breathtaking and the laughable. Pure cinematic indulgence with added sweat.

Craig Driver

After The Wedding (15)

Director: Susanne Bier A recent release from Denmark, this is a stylish portrayal of family politics and the issues surrounding child poverty.

Mads Mikkelsen, last seen as Bond’s nemesis in Casino Royale, stars as the manager of an Indian orphanage. The atmosphere is one of gentle turmoil as Mikkelsen returns to Denmark in order to secure the $4m he needs to save the orphanage. An often startling film with an array of subtle performances that creep up on you, this is a deft example of European cinema mercifully avoiding the usual clichés of arthouse cinema.

A beautiful and bold film.

Factory Girl (15)

Director: George Hickenlooper Another big screen adaptation of the life and celebrity of Andy Warhol arrives, only this time his muse Edie Sedgwick is the focus. While visually stunning and shot through with a vibrant display of colour and sound, this is a flawed and often biased account of a life lived purely for pleasure. Sienna Miller plays Edie while Hayden Christensen plays Dylan and a ghoulish Guy Pearce has the role of Andy Warhol. All are mere impersonations and never get under the skin of such complex and often depraved characters. Ignore the glitz and dig out the more perverse and true Ciao! Manhattan instead.

Premonition (12A)

Director: Mennan Yapo Sandra Bullock continues her gradual slide into obscurity in this mildly diverting story of a woman who sees her husband die only to realise it is a premonition. Bullock spends the rest of the film looking moody and mildly scared as she attempts to halt the inevitable tragedy. Julian McMahon, of Nip/Tuck fame, stars as her doomed husband while the brilliant Peter Stormare is wasted in a support role as a local doctor. This is standard spooky fare that fails to recognise its own inevitable poor reception at the hands of the public.

The Family Friend (15)

Helen Jack gains an exclusive interview with cult director and Hollywood icon Kenneth Anger

This opportunity to meet the famously difficult and somewhat private film maker has resulted from the recent transferral, funded by the UCLA Film and Television Archive, of Kenneth Anger’s early 16mm prints on to 35mm. Anger began making films at the impressively young age of 11, when he learnt how to use a camera as well as grasp the technical and poetic language of cinema. This led to the release of his first film, Fireworks (1947). This accomplished work was made by the 17-year-old Anger over a weekend while his parents were out of town, and concerns the dreams of a young man (played by the director himself). Fetishising the male physique and drawing on homoerotic imagery of sadomasochism in the queered space of men’s public bathrooms, the film is not afraid to openly discuss, through visual language, issues of sexuality and unconscious desires. This was a brave move during a time when Hollywood dominated and homosexual reforms were not of mainstream concern. Some things, it seems, never change.

How does it feel to have your older films finally transferred on to 35mm at last?

I was fortunate to be chosen by UCLA to have my prints transferred. The thing about 35mm is you get a perfect projection, you have the power of the illumination and you have that strong light source that brings out the colour and detail of the image. When they try to project 16mm print on to a large screen it doesn’t do justice to the film. It doesn’t really matter if you make a movie using celluloid or on digital. It depends on the artist’s eye. You can have a simple camcorder and create something interesting and beautiful. I’ll judge it on its results.

Your next film Elliot’s Suicide, focuses on Elliot Smith and the events surrounding his death. How do you feel about the rumours surrounding what happened?

Elliot was a good friend of mine. It’s an open case because her [Smith’s girlfriend, Jennifer Chiba] fingerprints were on the knife and it was considered that she had killed him. I don’t think she had the strength to do it. To take a knife and plant it in someone’s heart is pretty hard. It’s not like a piece of cake. I don’t think she could have done it, but she did cause his death in a technical sense because she pulled out the steak knife, which is a big mistake. If she’d left it in him and called 911, they might have been able to save him. It’s a real shame. At 34, he had so much talent and for him to go and do something so ridiculous…

How did the two of you meet and become such good friends?

Well, we were neighbours in Echo Park, Silverlake [Los Angeles]. He used to play at a place called Sunset Junction and I just swung by one night because there was this music coming out of the place. I just went in and sat down and after about 40 minutes he came over and spoke to me. I feel now that I have an emotional commitment to him.

Given your strong reliance on the visual, how would you describe the design and feeling of the film?

The film is eluded to like a dream, or a nightmare. There are elements like knives, girlfriends and locked doors set against the banal Californian-type kitchen where it’s very sunny. It’s a 1950s-type thing so it’s this cheerful setting, but it’s splattered with blood. I think it’s an interesting project.

‘The Films of Kenneth Anger: Volume One’ is out now on region 1 DVD Kenneth Anger’s ‘Inauguration of the Pleasure Dome’

Director: Paolo Sorrentino A highly original if occasionally grotesque drama, this is the latest offering from promising Italian director Sorrentino. The film follows Geremia, an ageing loan shark, who lives alone in his shabby house with his scornful, bedridden mother. Nurturing a morbid, obsessive relationship with money, he uses his wealth to insinuate himself into other people’s affairs. Bad things inevitably happen as Geremia falls madly in love with a beautiful young lady. With a gallery of idiosyncratic characters and an often surreal atmosphere, this is below par Fellini searching for an audience. latest 7 23

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3/14/07

11:42 AM

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MUSIC

THE BIG GIG

THIS WEEK Kate Nash + Peggy Sue & The Pirates The media have gone slightly mental over this one, part of the new wave of storytelling female songsmiths who have injected a much-needed shot of humour, and general nuttiness into the often grim and male world of indie music. Like a more lo-fi Lily Allen and a less sophisticated Regina Spektor, Nash’s cultivated childlike image is sometimes met by a menacing minimal electro-dance dirge, but more often allied to a simple folksy acoustic backdrop. Interesting, and of-themoment stuff. Meanwhile, Peggy Sue & The Pirates are a disarming female duo with copious outpourings of caustic wit married to punk jazz vocals.

In both cases they probably have limited record sales appeal due to the storytelling nature of the music, but live they all have engaging personalities making this a much-anticipated night out.

Sat 24 Mar, Red Roaster, Brighton, 01273 686668

The Rumble Strips Pet Shop Boys First UK tour for five years by the Boys who continue to enjoy massive popularity.

Wed 30 May, Brighton Centre, 0870 900 9100

Latest 7’s Top 5 records The Black Dog Book of Dogma (album Soma) A key electronica/techno act of the early 90s, Black Dog released a number of now highly sought-after singles before they released two landmark albums on Warp. This collection brings together those almost impossible to find records, and it’s a reminder how inventive and evocative they were – with nods to the techno landscapes of Detroit and Dusseldorf, they subtly added elements of dub and reggae and polished it all off with some crisp and cool beats to make cinematic journeys that you could also tap your toes to.

1

Maximo Park Our Earthly Pleasures (album Warp) Produced by Gil Norton, their second album is a literate and musical journey via some warming jangly guitars, some urgent post-punk thrashing, and all capped off by engaging storytelling lyrics. Very cool.

2

Rose Kemp A Hand Full Of Hurricanes (album One Little Indian) Offbeat, and verging on the avant-garde, Kemp’s sometimes harsh stopstart post-punk noise is met by occasional folky vignettes and a lo-fi sensibility. Sounds like where Radiohead meets Polly Harvey.

3

Kieran Hebden and Steve Reid Tongues (album Domino) Explosive progressive and melodic collages of jazz, folk and soul textures from veteran Motown drummer Reid and Four Tet’s Hebden.

4

The Bird and The Bee The Bird and The Bee (album Blue Note) At times utterly infectious floaty summer pop with noirish electronics.

At others like a 60s lounge record gone rancid. In other words, a mixed and intriguing bag.

5

Having been in many ‘ones to watch’ lists for 2007, The Rumble Strips will be watched closely to see if expectations are met. New single ‘Alarm Clock’ follows on from their brilliant releases of last year that showcased the amazingly sophisticated and unpredictable songsmithery of lead man Charlie Waller. This four-piece sound like a stripped-back early Dexys Midnight Runners, and live they carry the fiery rhythmic propulsion of the same band. Overall, an exhilarating band worthy of all the success that comes their way.

Fri 23 Mar, Audio, Brighton, 01273 606906

Salsa Celtica Formed in 1995 Salsa Celtica have now established themselves as an important force in world music in the UK and beyond, winning new fans and reaching a new level of profile and critical acclaim. In 2005 they embarked on their first tour of Canada and Europe, and appeared in the movie Driving Lessons, starring Julie Walters and Rupert Grint. New album El Camino (The Road) was released last year after a three-year break, and features a collaboration with folk diva Eliza Carthy. Their sound is a truly infectious salsa configuration that manages to combine the Cuban charanga sound of flute and fiddles with a Highland blend.

Fri 23 Mar, Komedia, Brighton, 01273 647100

Alex Wilson Pianist, arranger, composer and bandleader Alex Wilson is a leading light in the UK jazz and Latin scenes. The driving rhythms, vocal frontline and brass contingent of his 12-piece orchestra, make powerful Cuban influenced soulsalsa. There is also a pre-gig dance class to get you in the mood!

Sat 24 March, Corn Exchange, Brighton, 01273 709709

For music listings see our day-to-day guide starting on page 35 24 latest 7

If you would like your event listed please email listings@thelatest.co.uk

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3/14/07

11:45 AM

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MUSIC

BRIGHTON SCENE

THE MONTH AHEAD

A weekly round-up of what’s happening in the local Brighton and Sussex music scene

The Fall

Dates

Back in 1980 Brighton punks The Piranhas made the top ten with their cover version of the South African kwela song ‘Tom Hark’, which featured new lyrics by frontman ‘Boring’ Bob Grover. The band unexpectedly re-entered the charts in 2005 with a remake of this song entitled ‘Tom Hark (We Want Falmer)’, recorded under the name of Seagulls Ska with fellow Brighton resident Attila the Stockbroker. This was to help raise money for a new stadium for Brighton & Hove Albion FC at Falmer. Grover is back in action with his new band Dates (Sat 24 March, Providence) who release their debut album First Party, Fire and Theft, an enjoyably witty collection of quirky tunes about the things that really matter in life: religion, shoplifting, reality TV, missed opportunities, mobile phones, unconditional love and dodgy neighbours.

Two years in the making, 12 Stone Toddler (Thurs 22 March, Komedia) will be unleashing their debut album in May, but in the meantime they play one of their rare gigs, and it should be another of those jawdropping affairs where the beast that is the Toddler unleashes one of their incredibly bouncy and dynamic sets littered with funk rock dynamite, carnivalesque motifs, and a little bit of deranged metal. There’s plenty of dark humour in the band, which should 12 Stone Toddler be complemented very nicely by support act Turning Green who make manic, offbeat and acid-fried songs that demand your attention.

Almost one year ago Pete Bennett of local band Daddy Fantastic (Fri 23 March, Lo Lounge) got the OK to enter the Big Brother household. Not only did he go and win it but he subsequently entered into a lucrative recording contract leaving the Daddies in the lurch. But like good soldiers they marched on, quickened the pace and have not looked back it seems.

The aptly named ‘Things Have Been Weird Lately’ and current single ‘Goin’ Out Drinkin’’ sum up their crazy psychedelic blues rock ’n’ roll mash-up. Great live act to boot. Also on the bill are the awesome skafried, horn-blazing, mad-for-it Los Albertos who just keep on blowing audiences away with their live show, plus the superb female fronted punk upstarts Breach.

On the release front there’s a superb new acoustic soul funk band doing the rounds – the seven-piece Silent Earth (Tues 20 March, Joogleberry) are fronted by practising Buddhist Una Creary, and include Ru Garvey among their ranks, a brilliant guitarist and dance producer in his own right. Their music is a very warm and enveloping sound that will see the light of day on their soon-to-be-released debut album FAQ. Send your music and news to Jeff Hemmings, Music Editor, Latest 7, Unit 1, Level 5, New England House, New England Street, Brighton BN1 4GH. Listen to Jeff and Megan Goodwin on Latest 7 on the Radio, Mon–Thu, 10pm–midnight, Juice 107.2FM or via www.latest7.co.uk/podcasts. Read and reply to his blog: www.latest7.co.uk/blogs

latest 7 on the radio Tune into Juice 107.2FM Monday to Thursday, 10pm to midnight, for the latest music, news, interviews, live sessions and gig information with Jeff Hemmings and Megan Goodwin

If you would like your event listed please email listings@thelatest.co.uk

Mark E Smith has been at it for over 30 years with his band The Fall, one of John Peel’s favourite bands ever. Characterised by his abrasive yet evocative lyrics and half-droned, half-ranted vocals, Smith is the one constant through a bewildering succession of personnel changes over the course of a career that has seen the band release umpteen albums that never stray far from the classic Fall sound. Chaotic garage rhythms are overlaid by Smith’s brutal yet intellectual lyricism that mixes elements of social realism, surrealism and absurdism. The man is obviously a nightmare to be with, but God, is he a survivor!

Thurs 29 Mar, Old Market, 01273 736222 Sat 31 Mar, Pavilion Theatre, 01273 709709

Faithless Endearing and enduring British act which at its core features the former DJ and multiinstrumentalist Sister Bliss, production maestro Rollo and the jazzy hip hopper Maxi Jazz who elevates the generally euphoric, ambient music to a spiritual and socio-political level with many of his lyrics.

Featuring guest vocalists throughout their career including Pauline Taylor and Rollo’s sister Dido, Faithless have continued to defy media trends by remaining as popular and as relevant today as ever before. Their recently released greatest hits album has outsold any other UK ‘dance’ act by quite some distance, though strictly speaking Faithless are much more a band, mixing up many styles of music that have seen them enjoy massive cross-over appeal.

Tues 27 March, Brighton Centre, 0870 900 9100

NOWBOOKING Faithless 27 Mar, Brighton Centre Westlife 28 and 29 Mar, Brighton Centre Kieran Hebden & Steve Reid 31 Mar, Komedia The Fall 31 Mar, Pavilion Theatre Scott Matthews 4 Apr, Brighton Dome Barenaked Ladies 5 Apr, Brighton Dome Lemar 7 Apr, Brighton Centre Hayseed Dixie 9 Apr, Komedia Terry Callier 12 Apr, Komedia Midlake 12 Apr, Concorde 2 Sugababes 12 Apr, Brighton Centre The Osmonds, David Essex, David Cassidy 13 April, Brighton Centre The Beat 13 Apr, Concorde 2 Loudon Wainwright III 14 Apr, Dome James Taylor 18 Apr, Brighton Dome The Skatalites 22 Apr, Komedia The Waterboys 22 Apr, Brighton Dome The Church 28 Apr, Concorde 2 One Night of Queen 28 Apr, Brighton Centre

Deep Purple 29 Apr, Brighton Centre Australian Pink Floyd 30 Apr, B’ton Centre Jason Donovan 1 May, Brighton Dome Chris Difford 8 May, Komedia The loveGods 10 May, Komedia Shooglenifty 11 May, Komedia The Great Escape 17-19 May, various venues in Brighton, www.escapegreat.com Willy Mason 18 May, Pavilion Theatre Ray Davies 26 May, Brighton Centre G4 24 May, Brighton Centre Girls Aloud 29 May, Brighton Centre Pet Shops Boys 30 May, Brighton Centre Manic Street Preachers 6 June, B’ton Dome Allen Toussaint 15 June, Brighton Dome INXS 17 June, Brighton Dome Ronan Keating 21 June, Stanmer Park Blackmore’s Night 23 June, Brighton Dome Royal Philharmonic 24 June, Stanmer Park Don McLean 23 Oct, Brighton Centre latest 7 25

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3/14/07

3:03 PM

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MUSIC&MOLLY

Brighton Music Network Foxy Mamma Malone Lisa Holloway, BMN’s chief exec, talks to Julian Deane, ex-Toploader guitarist and director of Ray Gun Music Management After graduating from Sussex University, Julian Deane planned to do aid work but instead became a pop star! “It was a slog playing up and down the country. Then we did ‘Dancing In The Moonlight’ and it happened really quickly. We burnt out really quickly.”

After Toploader, Deane moved to Brighton. He taught music business studies at Brighton Institute of Modern Music. “I understood the intricacies of the business. In the early days of Toploader I drove to get us management. Even then I harboured desires to be a manager.”

He spotted psychedelic popster Paul Steel’s raw talent. Deane recalls: “I built his confidence as a writer and performer for 18 months. It’s important to develop a relationship without contractual obligations. I recommended other managers to him, then he asked if I would do it.”

Last year Paul Steel supported Sean Lennon, Aqualung and Ed Harcourt. 13 Artists, the agent for Deane’s other band, the XCerts, were crucial in developing a fan base. Getting a Sean Lennon support put Steel in front of the right people at an international level.

Steel signed to Polydor. “Lots of labels were showing interest. We did a fantastic lunchtime showcase at the Half Moon in Putney. It was pressure for the band – every move was scrutinised. They needed live experience to match the recordings, which everyone loved from day one. Labels want to see you can promote yourselves with a live band.”

Steel’s influences include the Beach Boys, Super Furry Animals and Rufus Wainwright. He is producing his album at home and mixing it with Tony Hoffer in Los Angeles (producer of The Kooks, The Fratellis and Beck).

“Don’t invite industry people to see you live until you’re really great. They won’t come back” “I met the XCerts in Brighton,” says Deane. “It was easy to decide to manage them; they’re a phenomenal live band.”

Often described as very Scottish, distorted pop, The XCerts, Deane says “sound only like themselves, which I’m interested in when discovering new music.” Their debut single, ‘Breathtaking Fight’ – which Steve Lamacq called ‘ludicrously punchy’ – was ‘Single of the Week’ on 6music. They had a Lamacq live session for Radio 1.

“The best way to break the XCerts is to keep on the road. They don’t have a record deal, but there is a national radio plugger and TV plugger in place. This is a strong position. We’re recording our own stuff and licensing it, or maybe signing up with a major.”

Deane’s advice for would-be managers: “You need drive. Be prepared for vans breaking down and calls at 1am. You must be clued up and have good contacts.”

Advice for artists? “Few bands are ready for management. A common excuse is, ‘If we had a manager, it would be OK.’ Once you’re ready for record and publishing deals, you need a manager. Most managers need to know you’re already doing it for yourself. Don’t invite industry people to see you live until you’re really great. They won’t come back.”

The Xcerts are supporting Paul Steel at The Pressure Point, Brighton on 31 March, £5/£4, 01273 684501. See www.myspace.com/paulsteel and www.myspace.com/thexcerts

Malone starts feeding the baby solids. It’s messy but it doesn’t give you a cough…

Solids. That’s what they call the food you feed a baby after six months.

That’s a lie. It is not solid. It is mush. It looks like sick in a jar. (Or, if you want you can spend ages cooking some sweet potatoes, to then watch them eat one ice-cube-size portion of it, then dribble the same amount all over their face, clothes, chair, walls and floor. If they get it on their hands, that’s it, game over. Then we are talking up the nose, in their eyebrows, ears and finally on you. If you are a new mum, black is so not the colour this season. Baby puke, milk, and ‘solids’ tend to show up pretty well on black. Pretty tough if you’re trying to sport the latest Emo look dressed in black, black and black. I got white baby rice all over my black skinny jeans; it was a panicky few minutes while I bobbed the baby on my knee scrubbing furiously with a damp cloth on the other knee. Now that’s multi-tasking.

“But hey! My parents couldn’t have wished for a better, more effective, chastity belt” When I was at school, solids were something you smoked. They were much more cost effective than the leaf variety, though they did give you a hacking cough and phlegm the morning after. But hey! My parents couldn’t have wished for a better, more effective, chastity belt.

At parties, while my peers were all drinking cider and snogging people called Darren Phillips and Louise Bates and then puking up over people called Sally Jones (why do we remember people from our school life by their first and second names and then as we get older, struggle to remember people’s first names? Must be all the experimenting with um, ‘solids’…) Anyhoo, while others were losing their inhibitions, drunk and getting off with each other, I on the other hand, would be (yes, OK) locked in a bathroom with a boy, but totally unable to say anything other than, “Have you got anything to make a roach out of?” Then we’d smoke a joint, mutter a few words in a paranoid haze, the solids totally inhibiting any teenage sexuality we might have wanted to pursue, then we’d leave the bathroom, return to the chaos of the cider party completely unable to communicate with the opposite sex.

My parents could sleep soundly. But how am I going to ensure my daughter doesn’t meet boys too early? (And too early is while in school!)

OK, a kiss and a cuddle is part of development, but sex makes babies…

If you’re young and can’t support one, you shouldn’t be doing the do. If you can’t do the time, don’t do the crime… I would not advocate smoking cannabis as it took a decade to quit that habit, stealing my motivation for many years. But I do need to think of ways to prevent my teenage offspring from drinking at parties. Hmmm, perhaps I can encourage her to stay a messy eater – chewed food all over the clothes and hair is not a good look; that might work. Personally, it’s certainly working as a deterrent for me.

For comments and chit chat email editorial@thelatest.co.uk

Crossword solutions Part nice men from next door, part cheeky rascals, all fun – A foot-stompin’, rip snortin’ six piece ska-based band

+ Daddy Fantastic + Breach Fri 23 March, Lo Lounge (Under The Hilton Brighton Metropole, Kings Road) 9pm–2am £5 www.losalbertos.co.uk www.myspace.com/daddyfantastic www.breach.uk.net 26 latest 7

Solution to Cryptic 84 ACROSS: 1 Cumbersome 8 Bedroom 9 Asset 10 Strictly 11 Zero 13 Occult 15 Turnip 17 Nose 18 Airborne 21 Still 22 Abridge 23 Reputation.

DOWN: 2 Udder 3 Broccoli 4 Rumble 5 Opal 6 Eastern 7 Atmosphere 8 Bassoonist 12 Outburst 14 Cashier 16 Dicast 19 Radio 20 Slip.

Solution to Quick 84 ACROSS: 1 Auctioneer 8 Hectare 9 Rabbi 10 Sorcerer 11 Curd 13 Infest 15 Reader 17 Agog 18 Beverage 21 Laity 22 Indoors 23 Handicraft.

DOWN: 2 Ulcer 3 Traverse 4 Omelet 5 Earl 6 Rebound 7 Wilderness 8 Hospitable 12 Defender 14 Foolish 16 Gemini 19 Aloof 20 Hymn. © Crossword Shop

For coverage in this magazine email editorial@thelatest.co.uk

027_LS313_barsbarreview/clubs

3/14/07

11:51 AM

Page 3

BARS &CLUBS Latest 7 & The Zap Club – Competition/Readers’ Offer

★Latest 7 drinks champagne at Koba Bar

Win a VIP night at Heist and the world famous Zap Club There are two ‘Golden Tickets’ a week to be won, which give the winner a VIP night out with a free cocktail for two at the Heist bar, West Street, followed by VIP entry into The Zap Club with a bottle of champagne. Plus, everyone’s a winner because all entrants will be emailed an eVoucher to get into The Zap Club for FREE, Tuesday to Thursday.

Question: The Zap sells a popular brand of beer named after an animal. Is it: A – Rhinoceros B – Tiger C – John Prescott

www.TheZapClub.co.uk Click the link on the front page of The Zap website to enter the competition

THIS WEEK AND THE MONTH AHEAD Undiluted @ The Beach Ah March… traditionally the time when students head home to get their washing done by mum, while unscrupulous landlords start to calculate the deposits they can steal off her kids. If you haven’t already been sent packing, you could do worse than this lively end-of-term drum and bass session featuring DJ Krust, Ed Solo and (for the mature studes among you) the Ragga Twins on MC duties. Don’t be shy, there’ll be another portion of student loan to prop you up next term.

23 March, £9/£8

Kavinsky @ Concorde 2 Anyone got any idea what they put in the French water supply during 2006? Once primarily known for disco-loopy house and increasingly poor Daft Punk records, last year the Frenchies caught the electro ball and ran with it, with Parisian label Kitsune especially scoring massive underground smashes. Tonight go Gallic with a mash up à Français with Nightmoves (best known for their juddering Klaxons remix) and Kavinsky playing the new platters that matter to hordes of happily munted types.

Vive la différence.

23 March, £8/£6

Ajuca Box @ Volks Welcome to Planet Volks, where the dreaded of head frug away to psychedelic trance like electroclash never happened. Fair play to them too, since nights like this have supported a Brighton scene that’s remained strong whatever the vagaries of fashion. Tonight, make room for the mushrooms as Wild Things don their trance pants while Legions of Dub make the basement echo.

24 March, £7/5

Bestival Launch Party @ Komedia No sooner has it started to warm up than young folks’ thoughts turn to the festival season. Getting in there early, the peeps at Bestival will be launching 2007’s fest with a one-off Komedia special featuring the comedy stylings of the Cuban Brothers and the notorious Sombrero Soundsystem. Enough to give you a taste of the festival that’s likely to be in a field of its own this September.

7 April, £13

Ultra chic and stylish, the Koba Bar is a popular venue in an ideally central Western Road location.

Having been voted in the Top 10 UK Cocktail Bars, Best Cocktails in the UK and Best Cocktail Barman in UK, this is a record to be proud of, and certainly a place where Del Boy and James Bond would feel right at home. Martini or piña colada anyone?

With a choice of over 130 cocktails (yep, one-three-zero) created by the professional bar staff, it’s easy to relax and drink in style against the luxurious backdrop of the public bar. There are purple velvet padded walls, creating a warm retreat to sip a special Koba cocktail that’s topped with chilled champagne.

If you’re celebrating, Koba cater in style and luxury with private hire available and offer more than ten types of champagne. But if cocktails, spirits and beers are your thing, sit back and relax in the public bar or take advantage of the setting and become a Koba Private Member.

Go on to discover the delight of the Champagne Bar, making a stylish backdrop for any date or The Gods bar, named for its upper location, soft lighting and altar-like bar.

What’s more, Koba takes advantage of late licensing laws, staying open 24 hours over the weekend. Very convenient!

Zara Friend Koba Bar, 135 Western Road, Brighton, 01273 720059

LATE NIGHT BARS

It’s past midnight, you’re still thirsty, but don’t want to go clubbing; here’s our guide to after-hours drinking Above Audio 10 Marine Parade, Brighton, 01273 606906 Sun–Thu, until 1am, Fri–Sat, until 2am Ancient Mariner 59 Rutland Road, Hove, 01273 570028, Sun–Thu, until 1am, Fri–Sat, until 2am Aqua Bar 23 Waterfront, Brighton Marina, 01273 819800, Sun–Thu, 11am–12am, Fri–Sat, 11am–2am Arc Bar 160 King’s Road Arches, Brighton, 01273 770505, Mon–Sun, until 2am Cosmopolitan Bar The Cosmopolitan Hotel, 29-31 New Steine, Marine Parade, Brighton, Mon–Thu, 4pm–12am, Fri 4pm–2am, Sat 3pm–2am, Sun 12pm–11.30pm Earth and Stars 46 Windsor Street, Brighton, 01273 722879, Sun–Thu, until 1am, Fri–Sat, til 2am The Fiddler’s Elbow 11 Boyce’s Street,Brighton, 01273 325850, Sun–Thu, until 2am, Fri–Sat, until 3am Fish Bowl 74 East Street, Brighton, 01273 777505, Sun–Wed, until 2am, Thu–Sat, until 3am The Freebutt 1 Phoenix Place, Brighton, 01273 603974, Sun–Thu, until 12am, Fri–Sat, until 1am The Globe 78 Middle Street, Brighton, 01273 770685, Sun–Wed, until 2am, Thu–Sat, until 3am Grand Central 29-30 Surrey Street, Brighton, 01273 329086, Sun–Wed, until 12am, Thu–Sat, until 2am

The Hope 11-12 Queen’s Road, Brighton, 01273 325793, Sun–Wed, until 12am, Thu–Sat, until 2am Koba 135 Western Road, Brighton, 01273 720059, www.kobauk.com.

Mon–Thu, until 5am, 24 hours over the weekend.

Rehab Bar Waterfront, Brighton Marina, 01273 675007, Sun–Thu, until 12am Riki Tik 18A Bond Street, Brighton, 01273 683844, until 3.30am Fri and Sat Saqqara 158 North Street, Brighton, 01273 779701, until 2am Sidewinder 65 St James’s Street, Brighton, 01273 608571, Sun–Thu, until 1am, Fri–Sat, until 2am Vanilla 73A Western Road, Hove, 01273 748182, Tue–Thu, 5.30pm–1.30am, Fri–Sat, 5pm–2.30am, Sun 12pm–1am, closed Mondays Western Front 11 Cranbourne Street, Brighton, 01273 725656, Sun–Wed, until 2am, Thu–Sat, until 3am Zoot Street Bar 8 Queen’s Road, Brighton, 087 1223 5776, Sun–Wed, 5pm–11pm, Thu–Sat, 5pm–1pm

For bar/club listings see our day-to-day guide starting on page 35 latest 7 27

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3/14/07

3:06 PM

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GAY

News

is feminising, makes the penis smaller and leads to homosexuality. Calling it a ’damaging slow poison’, he suggests cutting back on soya products.

Tue 20 Mar

Dining Dykes Dining Dykes, Brighton’s dining and social group is celebrating its first birthday, and the fact that they have their 100th member. All of the group’s profits are now going to Oasis, a charity for women, children and young people affected by substance and alcohol misuse.

If you’d like to join them, meet upstairs at R-Bar, Marine Parade on Saturday 31 March from 7:30pm. For more info email diningdykes@googlemail.com

Wild Fruit It’s time to get your fashion victim glad rags on as Wild Fruit hold an ‘Ugly Betty’ Easter Bank Holiday party on Sunday 8 April at Creation.

Revenge 10.30pm-5am. Lollipop Vs Kinky Dangerous. DJ Dulcie Danger banging away upstairs with the fabulous Lollipop Girls

Aquarium, 6 Steine Street Traditional backstreet boozer.

01273 605525 www.pleisure.com Barley Mow, 92 St George’s Road Mixed and friendly local in Kemp Town serving good food.

Nice outside terrace too.

01273 682259 Brighton Rocks, 6 Rock Place Fabulous, stylish bar and restaurant with outside decking. 01273 601139 Bulldog, 31 St James’s Street Landmark gay pub for 25 years.

Entertainment, happy hours.

01273 694097 www.bulldogbrighton.com Charles Street, 8 Marine Parade Huge swish café-bar serving food, has outside terrace, ’til 3am Fri/Sat. 01273 624091 www.charlesstreetbar.com Doctor Brighton’s 16–17 Kings Road Popular pub with huge vodka selection.

01273 328765 www.pleisure.com Fountain Inn High Street, Handcross Gay oasis in the countryside near Gatwick and very popular.

01444 400218 www.fountainpub.co.uk Jack Horner, 80 High Street, Worthing Worthing’s only gay pub. Some themed nights. 01903 236427

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Marlborough, 4 Princes Street Large pub popular with the girls, with a great theatre upstairs.

01273 570028 www.marlboroughtheatre.co.uk PV, 22 Upper North Street Great mixed pub with cool interior and regular live music.

01273 325491 www.thepv.co.uk Queens Arms, 7 George Street Opens 3pm every day with top cabaret and entertainment every night. 01273 696873 www.queensarmsbrighton.com R-Bar, 7 Marine Parade Open till 2am, Sun–Thu; 24 hours, Fri–Sun. 01273 608133 www.revenge.co.uk Revue Bar, 19 New Steine A stylish compact bar with a really friendly atmosphere.

01273 607456 Star Inn, 5–9 Manchester Street Menus every day, Sunday roasts. Live big screen sports.

01273 601450 www.starinnbrighton.com Vavoom, 31 Old Steine Video bar, right next door to Revenge. 01273 603010 www.vavoom.co.uk White Horse, 30 Camelford Street Friendly mixed local.

01273 603726 The Zone, 33 St James’s Street New men’s bar that’s just

hosting downstairs. £5 before 11, £7 after.

Sat 24 Mar The Gloucester 10.30pm-4am. Monkey.

Brighton’s favourite DJs playing some top tunes. NUS £5 all night, others £5 before 11/£7 before midnight/£9 after.

Drinks promos.

Sun 25 Mar Star Inn 12-11pm. Sunday lunches ’til 4pm then it’s the Bears Beer Bash with a charity raffle and Big Bears Buffet. The Bear weekend concludes!

Mon 26 Mar Marlborough 12pm-12am. Games social night from 6pm. Games, pool and tunes all the way!

3SIXTY is Brighton’s brightest monthly gay magazine with news, interviews, features and listings for the gay scene around Brighton and Hove.

March’s edition is out now. Pick up your free copy across the city.

You can also now download a full issue at www.3sixtymag.co.uk

A food writer in America is warning parents that soya bean products turn kids gay. Jim Rutz argues that oestrogen contained in soya

Marine Tavern, 13 Broad Street Cosy, traditional and friendly boozer with real beer.

01273 681284 www.harlequin-brighton.co.uk

Queens Arms 2:30-11:30pm. Food, wi-fi access and happy hour ’til 7pm. QA High School with Andy B/Cassidy Conners from 9pm. Drinks promos.

Fri 23 Mar

Soya “makes kids gay”

Legends Bar Dance and Hotel 31-34 Marine Parade Recently re-opened after a multi-million refit.

Wed 21 Mar

Charles Street Club 10.30pm-3am. Religion. Hosted

by Mother Superior Joan Bond with DJs Richard Jones and Tony B on the decks. £4/£3 flyer. £2 drinks promos.

The Archbishop of Canterbury has admitted that the Church is ’obsessed’ with homosexuality.

Dr Rowan Williams warned religious leaders that the public think that they focus too much on gay issues. The Archbishop’s comments come after he spent five days discussing gay sex at a conference with other Anglican leaders. He also said that he regrets spending so much time condemning gay people.

Amsterdam, 11 Marine Parade Bar, hotel, sauna and popular summer terrace. Food available every day. 01273 688825 www.amsterdam.uk.com

R-Bar 12pm-2am. Student night.

Selected drinks £2 all night. 59pm happy hour.

Thu 22 Mar

Sex confessions from the Archbishop

Pubs & bars

CHOICE

3SIXTY T: 01273 570570 E: info@3sixtymag.co.uk

opened, promising something a bit different for Brighton’s boys.

01273 626442

Clubs

Audio Hosts Sunday Sundae 10 Marine Parade Weekly chillout with occasional specials and drink promos.

01273 606906 Candy Bar, 129 St James’s Street UK’s only lesbian nightclub, till 3am, Fri/Sat. 01273 622424 www.thecandybar.co.uk Charles St Club, 8 Marine Parade Sleek club above Charles Street Bar, nightly promoters.

10pm–2am, 01273 624091 Harlequin, 43 Providence Place Bar/nightclub, cabaret/stripper, Fri/Sat nights. 9pm–4am, Fri/’Sat. 01273 620630 www.harlequin-brighton.co.uk Monkey, Brighton Gloucester, 27 Gloucester Place Every Saturday night. www.wildfruit.co.uk 01273 688011 Revenge, 32 Old Steine Huge two-floor club. 10pm-3am, Sun–Thu till 5am Fri/Sat till 6am www.revenge.co.uk Therapy @ Rehab Waterfront, Brighton Marina A weekly gay night at Brighton marina. Every Friday. A lovely stylish big bar!

V2, 5 Steine Street Open every night from 8pm till late. 01273 603010 Wildfruit, Creation, 78 West Street Usually once a month with themed nights. One for your calendar! www.wildfruit.co.uk

029_LS313_stage

3/15/07

2:19 PM

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STAGE

Period piece English Touring Theatre bring Terence Rattigan’s French Without Tears to Brighton An innocent world of frothy wit and hedonistic charm are key to this stylish and touching revival of a charming play by one of Britain’s most distinguished 20thcentury playwrights.

The sun is hot and the sea inviting, as a group of young gentlemen attempt to learn French in a house on the western coast of France. Unfortunately, the mysteries of syntax and pronunciation are so much less interesting than the mysteries of sex, romance and seduction. French Without Tears uses delicious humour to poke fun at the English male when he is abroad and in love.

The vibrant young company of actors in this production includes Jenna Harrison, who recently appeared in Night Of The Iguana in the West End, Adam James who featured in Rabbit at Trafalgar Studios and Terrence Hardiman, best known to television viewers as The Demon Headmaster.

Terence Rattigan, who lived in Brighton, wrote French Without Tears at the age of 25. Its huge success established his reputation and subsequent plays included Man And Boy, The Browning Version, The Deep Blue Sea and The Winslow Boy. English Touring Theatre (ETT) are committed to creating outstanding theatre and touring it to the widest possible audience. In their first 12 years the company has won 18 major awards and worked with some of the most talented and respected artists in the country. Other recent ETT shows include The Old Country and Hamlet.

‘French Without Tears’ runs at Theatre Royal Brighton, 20–24 March, nightly at 7.45pm, Thursday and Saturday matinees at 2.30pm, £15–£24. There will be a captioned performance on 22 March at 7.45pm. Call 08700 606 650 or see www.theambassadors.com/theatreroyal

Guess who?

An all-star cast, headed by Simon MacCorkindale, appear in The Unexpected Guest at Eastbourne’s Devonshire Park Theatre Following widespread critical acclaim for their star-studded production of The Hollow, this is the second production from The Agatha Christie Theatre Company.

Lost in the fog on a lonely road, a stranger seeks refuge in a nearby house – only to find that he has stumbled on to the scene of a murder. When the dead man’s wife confesses to killing her much-despised husband, the stranger agrees to provide her with an alibi. But who is he really protecting? And, in a house full of suspects, whose are the unidentified fingerprints found at the scene?

Credited as one of Agatha Christie’s most mischievous and chilling whodunnits, The Unexpected Guest is filled with all the suspense, intrigue and surprise twists that make Christie one of the world’s bestloved authors, and the undisputed first lady of crime.

The cast is led by international film star and TV veteran Simon MacCorkindale, whose first foray into the world of Agatha Christie was when he played the charming and cunning murderer in a major movie version of Death On The Nile. Simon, who is currently taking a sabbatical from his pivotal role as the consultant Harry Harper in Casualty, is also well known from several other major films including Riddle Of The Sands, and from the hit CBS TV series Falcon Crest. The cast also includes Frazer Hines and two of our most talented and versatile performers, Mark Wynter and Virginia Stride, plus EastEnders favourite Dean Gaffney.

‘The Unexpected Guest’ is at Devonshire Park, Eastbourne, 26–31 March, nightly at 7.45pm, Wednesday and Saturday matinees at 2.30pm, £13.50 –£19.50. Call 01323 412000 or see www.eastbournetheatres.co.uk

Boom boom Basil continues to entertain kids of all ages in The Fox Factor – Starring Basil Brush at Worthing’s Pavilion Theatre this Easter For whole generations of Brits, Basil Brush is an iconic childhood hero, some of us can even remember the lyrics to his theme song!

Created back in the 1960s by the amazing team of Peter Firmin, puppet-maker, and Oliver Postgate, writer, Basil has continued to entertain kids ever since. Now, direct from CBBC, the nation’s favourite ginger fox, Basil Brush, will be booming into Worthing with his spectacular laughter show this Easter.

Basil heads a star cast in a show packed with side-splitting comedy, jaw-dropping magic, song, dance and buckets full of audience participation and surprises!

Assisting Basil will be award-winning TV comedian Tucker and spellbinding wizard

Keelan Leyser who will amaze and dumbfound you with his breathtaking illusions. There’s also our special guest stars Boney M-inem and The Creepy Crew, performing an all-singing, alldancing ultraviolet spook-tacular!

Why not use the kids as an excuse to join Basil for an unmissable Easter treat that will leave you all cheering: “Boom, Boom!”

‘The Fox Factor – Starring Basil Brush’ is at the Pavilion Theatre, Worthing on Thursday 5 April at 2.30pm, £12. Call 01903 206206 or see www.worthing theatres.co.uk. latest 7 29

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STAGE

THEATRE LISTINGS

From Tuesday 20 March to Monday 16 April 2007 BRIGHTON DOME 01273 709709 www.brightondome.org William Shakespeare’s The Tempest Four plays by William Shakespeare performed over four consecutive nights, presented by students in their final year of Performing Arts at Sussex Downs College. Pavilion Theatre.

•Tue 20 Mar, 7pm (doors 6.15pm) £6/£3 William Shakespeare’s Twelfth Night The second night of four William Shakespeare plays performed by students in their final year of Performing Arts at Sussex Downs College.

Pavilion Theatre.

•Wed 21 Mar, 7pm (doors 6.15pm), £6/£3 William Shakespeare’s A Midsummer Night’s Dream The third night of four performances by students in their final year of Performing Arts at Sussex Downs College.

Pavilion Theatre.

•Thu 22 Mar, 7pm (doors 6.15pm) £6/£3 William Shakespeare’s Hamlet The final Shakespeare play performed by students in their final year of Performing Arts at Sussex Downs College. Pavilion Theatre.

•Fri 23 Mar, 7pm (doors 6.15pm) £6/£3

BRIGHTON LITTLE THEATRE 01273 777748 www.the-little.co.uk The Real Thing A mixed-up story about Henry, a playwright married to Charlotte who has the lead role in his latest play about adultery. Her co-star is Max married to actress Anne, but Henry and Anne are in love! – Is it real or just another play?

•Tue 27–Sat 31 Mar, 7.45pm, £7.50

THE CAPITOL, HORSHAM 01403 750220 www.thecapitolhorsham.com Big Ballet A ballet of weighty elegance and adorable humour – classical and modern pieces performed by dancers each weighing no less than 220lb. A surprising and thrilling show.

•Tue 20 Mar (please call for times and prices) The Play What I Wrote A celebration of Britain’s greatest double act, Morecambe and Wise. Hamish has written an epic play set in the French Revolution but Sean wants them to continue with their double act. Can they compromise?

•Thu 22–Sat 24 Mar, 8pm (and 2.30pm Sat) £17/£15 (mat £14) Calamity Jane The tale of the larger than life heroine from Deadwood City, with songs and adventures, not forgetting the Windy City.

See the transformation of the rough and tough Jane into a lovely lady in this classic story.

•Tue 27 Mar–Sat 31 Mar, 7.30pm plus 2.30pm matinee Sat 31 March. Please call for prices Rainbow Live Children’s television favourites Bungle, Zippy and George are back in an allnew live show, with fun and frolics appealing to all ages.

•Thu 12 Apr, 2pm, £8 Reelin’ And A Rockin’ Enjoy hits of the 60s in this great show featuring Dave Berry and more.

•Sat 14 Apr, 7.30pm, £22.50 An Evening With... Julian Clary Leaving the make-up and sequins behind, Julian Clary reveals all in this intimate show. Filled with Clary’s wit and charm that has captivated audiences for 20 years.

•Sun 15 April, 8pm, £20

and passion performed to a real orchestra.

•Mon 26 Mar, 7.30pm, £21/£19.50/£18 Kaleidoscope Students from Bourne primary school present a vibrant show of dance, gymnastics and music themed around colour.

•Tue 27 Mar, 7pm, £5 Sweet Charity A tender and poignant tale of a girl who wears her heart on her sleeve.

Presented by Eastbourne’s Rattonians, this classic New York Musical features songs including ‘Hey, Big Spender’. Ticket price includes a free programme and £1 donation to Cancer Research.

•Wed 11–Sat 14 Apr, 7.45pm plus 2.30 mat Thu and Sat, £8.50/ £10/ £12/ £14 (£10 mat) The Goodies Still Rule OK! A laughter-filled evening with clips, sketches and reminiscences of the legendary Goodies. With Tim Brooke-Taylor and Graeme Garden live on Stage.

•Sun 15 Apr, 7.30pm, £17.50/£19.50

EASTBOURNE: DEVONSHIRE PARK THEATRE 01323 412000 www.eastbournetheatres.co.uk The Importance Of Being Earnest Eastbourne Operatic & Dramatic Society celebrate their centenary by presenting this ‘trivial comedy for serious people’. (Wilde) •Wed 21 to Sat 24 Mar, 7.30pm plus 2.30pm Thu & Sat, £11/£10/£9 The Unexpected Guest The Agatha Christie Theatre Company are back with a new production: A man lost in the fog stumbles across a home, but seeking refuge, he comes across a murder. Compelling and filled with suspense, an enticing whodunnit mystery.

•Mon 26 to Sat 31 Mar, 7.45pm plus 2.30pm Wed & Sat, £18/£16/£13.50 Mon–Thu eves, £19.50/£17.50/£13.50 Fri & Sat eves, £13.50 Wed & Sat mats.

September Tide Based on Daphne Du Maurier’s classic story about a widow who rejects marriage proposals but finds herself falling for her daughter’s new husband, Evan.

•Mon 2–Sat 7 Apr, 7.45pm plus Wed and Sat matinees 2.30pm, 7.30pm plus 2.30pm Wed & Sat, £13.50/£16/£18 Mon–Thu eves, £13.50 /£17.50/£19.50 Fri and Sat eves, £13.50 Wed and Sat matinees Perfect Pitch Fantastic observational comedy about a couple who find the perfect place to pitch their caravan until the neighbours from hell turn up to shatter the peace!

•Mon 9–Sat 14 Apr, 7.45pm plus Wed and Sat matinees 2.30pm, £13.50/£16/£18 Mon–Thu eves, £13.50/£17.50/£19.50 Fri and Sat eves, £13.50 Wed and Sat matinees

EASTBOURNE: ROYAL HIPPODROME 01323 412000 www.eastbournetheatres.co.uk Seussical A musical extravaganza featuring favourite Dr Seuss characters. Join the cat in the hat on an imaginative journey.

•Fri 23 & Sat 24 Mar, 2.30pm, 7.30pm, £9

EASTBOURNE: WINTER GARDEN 01323 412000 www.eastbournetheatres.co.uk We’ll Meet Again Back by popular demand, singers, comedians and musicians recall great wartime entertainment with the likes of Bing Crosby and Vera Lynn.

•Tue 3 Apr, 2.30pm, £11

EASTBOURNE: CONGRESS THEATRE

GARDNER ARTS CENTRE, BRIGHTON

01323 412000 www.eastbournetheatres.co.uk Le Grande Cirque Captivating and spellbinding show. See this breathtaking production featuring top artistes from around the globe.

•Wed 21–Sun 25 Mar, 7.30pm with Thurs, Sat & Sun mats 2.30pm £26/£24/£22/£20 (Fri, Sat & Sun eves) £24.50/£22.50/£20/£17.50 Wed & Thu eves, Sat & Sun mats, £19.50/£17.50 Thu mat Russian Cossack State Dance Company Direct from Moscow, a show filled with energy

01273 685861 www.gardnerarts.co.uk Henri Oguike Dance Company A mixed bill of expansive dancing and intuitive choreography.

Ages 11+.

•Tue 20 Mar, 8pm, £14/£12 Kinder Transport Moving and powerful play about nine-year old Eva who moves to Manchester on the outbreak of World War II, changes her name and buries memories of her past life, but the past resurfaces when her own daughter discovers letters locked in the attic.

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Ages 12+ •Fri 23–Sat 24 Mar, 8pm, £14/£12 Tag... Me Vs The City Hip-hop theatre production with a cast of six dancers exploring the physicality of graffiti art lettering through a collage of rap, break dancing and body–popping.

A life size graffiti set and on–stage video animation. For ages 12+ •Tue 27–Wed 28 Mar £12.50/£10

THE HAWTH, CRAWLEY 01293 553636 www.hawth.co.uk Caught In 1609, while on the run for killing a man, Caravaggio paints a glorious nativity. Fast forward to 1969 and the Mafia steal the piece.

A tale of two dark, violent lives centuries apart but connected by one painting. Strong language.

•Thu 22 Mar, please call for show times and prices Black Compelling drama of passion and revenge set in Edwardian England. Was Cressida really widowed by design, as her daughter Emily believes? Surreal and increasingly sinister events unfold...

•Fri 30–Sat 31 Mar, please call for times and prices You Don’t Need To Know That Comic mayhem as a man wakes up to find a policeman at the end of his bed. Did he really commit a crime he can’t recall?

•Tue 17 Apr, 7.45pm, please call for prices

KOMEDIA, BRIGHTON 01273 647100 www.komedia.co.uk Caught Part love story, part thriller: in 1609, while on the run for killing a man, Caravaggio paints a glorious nativity. Fast forward to 1969 and the Mafia steal the piece. A tale of two dark, violent lives centuries apart but connected by one painting.

•Tue 20–Wed 21 Mar, 8pm, £10/£8

A hilarious black comedy set in an office followed by a play exploring the dark side of relationships.

•Sat 24–Sat 31 Mar, 7.45pm (Tue–Sat) 2.30pm Sun, no performance Mon

THEATRE ROYAL, BRIGHTON 08700 606650 www.theambassadors.com/theatreroyal French Without Tears Young Englishmen in the French Riviera find learning French easier than understanding women. Stylish revival of the touching 1930s comedy.

•Tue 20–Sat 24 Mar, 7.45pm and 2.30pm Thu & Sat, £23/£21/£18/£15 (Tue–Thu eve, Sat mat) £18/£15 Thu mat, £24/£22/£19/£16 Fri & Sat eves Sing-Along-A-Abba The Swedish bands hits performed live on stage with a special screen displaying the words for the audience to join in too! A party bag for everyone, fancy dress, Dancing Queen competition and great music.

•Sun 25 Mar, 7.30pm, £17 Tracy Beaker Based on the popular books and children’s television series, Tracy Beaker explodes on stage in this new show with music for all the family. Discover the touching and funny world according to Tracy Beaker.

•Tue 27–Sun 31 Mar, 7pm Tue and Fri, 1.30pm and 6.30pm Wed and Thu, 12pm and 5pm Sat, £16 adults, £10 children Rocky Horror Show Following a recordbreaking sell-out in the West End, the Rocky Horror show returns with its raunchy rock’n’roll.

Put on the fishnets and stilettos and join Frank and the gang for an unforgettable night.

•Mon 2–Sat 7 April, Mon 2 Apr, 7.45pm Tue–Thu, 6pm and 9pm Fri and Sat, £29.50, £26.50, £23.50, £18 Mon–Thu eve and Sat early. £24/£20 Fri early, £32.50, £29.50, £25.50, £20 Fri and Sat eves.

The New Statesman Hilarious political and sexual shenanigans in this all-new show starring comedy favourite Rik Mayall.

•Mon 9–Sat 14 April, 7.45pm, plus 2.30 matinee Thu and Sat. £16/£19/£23/£26 Mon–Thu eves and Sat mat, £16/£20 Thu mat, £17/£20/£24/£27 Fri and Sat eves

WORTHING: CONNAUGHT THEATRE

Tom Thumb A scary ogre head, flying fiery houses and a portable forest – this is a tale about being afraid – performed entirely on a kitchen table with the wee wonder Tom Thumb.

•Sun 25 Mar, ages 6+, 2pm, £6 You Don’t Need To Know That... Comedy and drama collide in this play about an ordinary man who wakes up to find a Police Inspector by his bed, accusing him of a crime he doesn’t quite know about....

•Wed 28 Mar, 8pm, £10/£8 The Magic Sandals Enchanting theatre for children about Hualachi, who is sent to deliver an important message by the almighty Emperor of Ancient Peru. A tale about the colourful characters he meets on the way with puppetry, music and a pair of magic sandals.

•Sun 1 Apr, ages 3–8, 2pm, £6/£5 The Improvability Drive The Maydays present an improvised show based on audience suggestions. Book early as tickets sell fast.

•Fri 6 Apr, 9pm, £7/£6

MARLBOROUGH THEATRE, BRIGHTON 07782 278521 www.marlboroughtheatre.co.uk The Maydays Longform Class Showcase One-act improvised play inspired by the audience.

•Thu 22 Mar and Wed 4 Apr, 8pm, £5 The Maydays: When The Script Hits The Fan Improvised show inspired by the audience with no script, props or safety net!

•Sat 31 Mar, 8pm, £6 Scratch Night Comedy, dance and spoken word where the audience is invited to give new artists feedback on their performance!

•Sun 15 Apr, 8pm, £5

NEW VENTURE THEATRE, BRIGHTON 01273 746118 www.newventure.org.uk Double Bill: The Interview/ Agape’s Excess

01903 206206 www.worthingtheatres.co.uk Sailor, Beware! Albert Tuffnell is weary that his fiancee will turn out like her Mother when they are married. Add to that, she has plans for them to move to just three doors away from her Mother! Watch Albert look for a solution to his woes with mishaps and confusion along the way.

•Tue 27–Sat 31 Mar, 7.30pm, 2pm Wed and Sat, £12.50.

Blood Brothers – The International Triumph The hit West End Musical comes to Worthing telling the story of twin boys separated at birth who are then reunited by fate and a dark secret kept by their mother.

•Mon 2–Sat 14 Apr, 7.30pm, 2pm Wed and Sat, £26.50/£28, Mon–Thu eve and Sat mat, £28/£29.50 Fri–Sat eve, £22.50/£24.50 Wed mat.

WORTHING: PAVILION THEATRE 01903 206206 www.worthingtheatres.co.uk Gigi Worthing Light Opera Company present a fantastic show featuring the tracks ‘I Remember It Well’, ‘Thank Heaven For Little Girls’ and more.

•Wed 21–Sat 24 Mar, 7.30pm plus Wed & Sat mat 2.30pm, £8.50/£9.50/£10.50 Russian Cossack State Dance Company Direct from Moscow, with 50 dancers, musicians and singers – a dynamic production packed with energy and excitement.

•Sun 25 Mar, 7.30pm, £21/£19.50/£18 The Big Ballet A unique ballet ensemble of 20 with each weighing no less than 220 pounds.

Proving that grace and elegance is not linked to ‘thin.’ Sets out to challenge social standards.

•Tue 27 Mar, 7.30pm, £16.50/£18.50 Seussical The Musical Taking the popular Cat in a hat character and presenting an all-new delightful musical show from Anyone4Theatre?

•Fri 30 Mar, 7.30pm, please call for prices The Fox Factor – Starring Basil Brush Spectacular show for all the family with the popular character Basil Brush. Comedy, mayhem and laughs plus special guests.

•Thu 5 Apr, 2.30pm & 6pm, £12

If you would like your event listed please email listings@thelatest.co.uk

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KIDS

Material girls

EVENTS

THIS WEEK’S PREVIEWS

Harriet Hoff lends a hand in a fashion workshop for girls in preparation for an upcoming show February half term was a busy week for the girls at St Marys Hall. The teens, aged 11 to 16 have been busy raising money for their chapel and arts centre by making some glamorous and outrageous outfits in a fashion workshop.

The fashion workshop was run by mum to one of the girls and our very own fashion writer and stylist, Harriet Hoff. Harriet got the girls learning about construction by making outfits for each other out of bin liners which caused much amusement.

The girls were then set a brief to create an outfit for themselves to model in a show on 23 March out of old unwanted clothes and bits and bobs found around the house. The results were presented to make up artist Janice Hansen and her keen eye for help with styling and make up and finishing the looks. The girls then modelled for a photoshoot with photographer Charlotte MacPherson. Preparation is now underway for the big show. Keep your eyes peeled for the amazing results...

See the results of the workshop in the fashion show held after the appeal launch, Fri 23 March. Contact St Mary’s Hall for more details on 01273 647778 or visit www.stmaryshall.co.uk

Badger Weekend Badger Trust Sussex hosts a special family event at Foredown Tower this Saturday 24 and Sunday 25 March. A chance to learn more about the badger and its ecology, the event offers the chance to place questions to the Trust and view the equipment used in badger rescue.

During the event, there will also be talks and slideshows, offering further insight into the world of badgers.

Foredown Tower Countryside Centre, Foredown Road, Portslade, Saturday 24 and Sunday 25 March, 10am–4.30pm, all ages welcome, free (entry charge for gallery viewing and the camera obscura). For more information call the Badger Trust hotline on 07910 198720

Star Matched Speed Dating Spring fever is here – time to have fun and enjoy some romance. And for those who can’t find that special someone, there’s a unique event on Tuesday 20 March at Brighton’s Al Duomo’s to help love along the way.

Star Matched Speed Dating leaves internet dating behind (as meeting someone in person can be a helluva lot different to chatting over email) and has come up with a new speed-dating method using the Instant Combatability System.

Scientists and experts say we make up our minds about liking someone within seconds, meaning speed dating can be a way to find ‘The One’. Meet 20-30 different people in a relaxed and safe environment and let psychological astrologers Helen Sewell and John Green use their Instant Compatability System to see how well suited you are to fellow guests. A fun icebreaker to start the evening, John says: “It has proved to be very successful in providing guests with extra information, but more than anything, it’s a lot of fun and gets the evening off to a good start.”

Come along to the Star Matched event, meet new people and maybe even find love.

Star Matched Speed Dating Event will be held on Tuesday 20 March at Al Duomo restaurant, Brighton at 7pm, places are £16. Prior booking is essential to ensure an equal number of men and women. See www.starmatched.com to secure a place.

To feature in kids email editorial@thelatest.co.uk 12,000 students attend the University of Sussex.

The only way to reach these potential clients is through the University of Sussex Students’ Union.

The badger is the Students’ Union’s tabloid newspaper, published every Thursday and read by 84% of students*.

The pulse, our termly magazine, has been awarded the best UK Student Magazine twice by The Guardian and Independent newspapers.

To advertise in either publication, phone the USSU marketing team on 01273 678151 or email ussu-marketing@sussex.ac.uk * Student Lifestyle Questionnaire 2002

If you would like your event listed please email listings@thelatest.co.uk

UPCOMING HIGHLIGHTS Whose Reading Is It Anyway?

March saw the launch of the 2007 City Read, with this year’s city-wide read being of Daphne Du Maurier’s bestselling gothic mystery Rebecca.

Special events, workshops, reading groups and film showings devoted to the book take place across the city, and continue in April with Whose Reading Is It Anyway? at the University of Sussex.

This event sees five panellists (made up of two academics, two students and two noncampus participants) go head-to-head with five short readings from Rebecca, with the audience voting for their favourite.

Join in the city-wide read of this classic story and come along to this interactive panel event of Whose Reading Is It Anyway?

Whose Reading Is It Anyway? is at the University of Sussex on Tuesday 24 April at 6.30pm and is free. For more information call 01273 877888.

Zara Friend latest 7 31

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ART

See more at latest-art.co.uk IO GALLERY Sydney Street, Brighton 01273 671212 Richard Hearn Exhibition of paintings. Until 26 March, Mon–Sat 10am–6pm, Sun 11am–5pm

Camber II at Scenes of Sussex, Crane Kalman

NORTH LAINE PHOTOGRAPHY GALLERY Above Snooper’s Paradise, Kensington Gardens, Brighton 01273 686506 Open Brief Over 50 images from photographers who were chosen from hundreds of entries to last year’s North Laine Photography Essence of Brighton and Hove competition. Mon–Sat 10.15am–5.45pm, Sun 1.15am–3.45pm

O CONTEMPORARY

Simon Dack – The Level ‘87

Eye of the storm Handpicked from the 2006 Essence of Brighton and Hove Photography Competition, 14 photographers have responded to an open brief from North Laine Photography Gallery.

There’s former Argus photographer Simon Dack’s amazing image of The Level Alan Williams – Pelican in Brighton following the 1987 storm, while 20 years later the Paper Circles photography group have used the same location to do the night shoot that sees them using milk to lambast the ‘glamorous’ portrayal of ‘youth binge culture’.

Ben Glazebrook’s portraits of hoodies have a somewhat unidentifiable appeal while Katie Greenwood’s Tate Modern location shoot conjures up an instant classic image and a favourite with early visitors to the show.

The list goes on with over 50 images on display.

As is often the case, North Laine Photography Gallery have taken some chances, but once again have come up with an exhibition that should appeal to both photographic professionals and the public at large.

Open Brief, North Laine Photography Gallery, Kensington Gardens, Brighton, until 31 March

5 Bartholomew’s, Brighton 01273 774222 Showcase of original artwork from emerging, creative talent, as well as more established artists. Mon–Sat 10am–6pm, Sun 11am–5pm

BRIGHTON MUSEUM AND ART GALLERY Church Street, Brighton 01273 290200 Sir Frank Brangwyn Revered artist whose etchings used strong light and shade and were often an homage to work and the working man and woman Until 25 March Alice Maher: Natural Artifice Major exhibition for this multi-disciplinary artist. Using sculpture, installation, drawing and photography, she creates unsettling pieces that trigger emotional responses, and which are often drawn from myth and folklore. Until 9 Apr Unearthing Our Past: Brighton and Hove Archaeological Society 1906–2006 Illustrating the work of the society by looking at its local excavations. Until 25 Mar, Tue–Sat 10am–5pm, Sun 2–5pm

North Road, Brighton 01273 628952 Fusion – Reaction – Effect Influenced by Pollock and Dali, Silas Wager uses music to inspire his works of digital manipulation.

Until 31 March, Mon–Sat 10am–6pm

ROYAL PAVILION Royal Pavilion Gardens, Brighton 01273 290900 Stig Evans Artist in Residence at the Pavilion, he’s been working with the Pavilion’s Conservation Department, looking into the history of the building’s painted decorative schemes. A series of his works inspired by the project are being exhibited. Until 26 Apr, Mon–Sun 10am–5.15pm (hours till end March)

UNIVERSITY OF BRIGHTON GALLERY PERMANENT GALLERY 20 Bedford Place, Brighton Roundabout Charts the gradual disintegration of a character (inspired by Willie Loman from Death of a Salesman) developed by Annis Joslin and Cavan Clerkin during evenings off, staying in a roadside motel. Through their improvised mini-video experiments an intimate portrait emerges. Until 25 March, Thurs, Fri & Sun 1–6pm, Sat 11am–6pm

PHOENIX GALLERY Waterloo Place, Brighton 01273 603700 Taking Off! Rocket Artists Group New work by this group consisting of eight artists with

Grand Parade, Brighton 01273 643101 Drawing Upon Drawing: 50 Years of Illustrating by John Vernon Lord Major retrospective of this illustrator whose work graces books, magazines and advertising media. Until 5 May, Mon–Sat 10am–5pm

WORTHING MUSEUM AND ART GALLERY Chapel Road, Worthing 01903 221448 Luke Dickinson Sensual stone carvings.

Until 23 Jun Tue–Sat, 10am–5pm Water, Water Everywhere 40 treasures from the museum’s stores that explore watery themes. Until 16 Jun, Tues–Sat 10am–5pm

Linda McCartney, Steve Pyke and Bruce Rae. Until 1 May, Mon–Sat 10am–6pm, Sun 10.30am–4.30pm

DE LA WARR PAVILION Marina, Bexhill on Sea 01424 229111 A Secret Service: Art, Compulsion, Concealment Exploring the work of 16 artists whose work centres on the creation of secret worlds or the exposure of hidden facts and images. Until 15 April, Mon–Sun 10am–6pm

GARDNER ARTS CENTRE University of Sussex, Falmer 01273 685681 Will Nash: The Footprint Project Collaboration between sculptor Will Nash and everyday users of Stanmer Park. The project observes the park as a living network of pathways. 2000 maps of the park, designed by Nash, were distributed to visitors who were asked to mark their route around it. This raw material was then used for a new body of sculptures and prints by Nash.

Until 31 Mar, Mon–Sat, 10am–6pm and during evening performances in the theatre

CHALK GALLERY

GEORGE STREET GALLERY

North Street, Lewes 01273 474477 21 professional artists from across all media.

Featured artist is Miranda Ellis and her exotic and colourful landscapes. Mon–Sun 10am–5pm

George Street, Brighton 01273 681852 Mr Wilkinson Affordable abstract speed paintings – explosive, masculine, full of potent energy. Until 31 March, Tue–Sat 10am–3pm

CRANE KALMAN BRIGHTON

HOVE MUSEUM AND ART GALLERY

Kensington Gardens, Brighton 01273 697096 Scenes of Sussex: Where The Hills Meet The Sea Featuring six superb photographers including Fay Goodwin, Tim Hall, Jon Holloway,

New Church Road, Hove 01273 290200 Jacqueline Yu-Fan Li Delicate ceramics inspired by a sense of space. Until 15 Apr, Wed–Sat 11.30am–5pm, Sun 2–5pm

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PAINTING POTTERY CAFE

learning disabilities who have been working in collaboration with University of Brighton students. Until 21 April, Tue–Sat 11am–5pm

ART LISTINGS ART AT FIVE

Trafalgar Street, Brighton 01273 698500 Mixed Show Mixed collection of painting, sculpture, photography and limited-edition signed prints by artists including David Hockney, Tracey Emin, and Takashi Murakami. Until 30 Mar, Tue–Fri 10am–5.30pm, Sat 10am–6pm, Sun 12am–5pm

If you would like an event listed, please email listings@thelatest.co.uk

033_LS313_7daystolive

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LISTINGS

YOUR COMPLETE LISTINGS GUIDE STARTS HERE

latestlistings This week and the month ahead

7 days to live ★Music

★Music

20:03:07

★Stand-up Club Boothby Mixing music with comedy, this ever-popular performer of stage, radio and TV and regular at the Komedia, infects you with his laid-back and comfortable style.

Bringing together the man himself, the house band and special guests, it’s gonna be a good night.

Komedia, Brighton, Saturday 24 March, 7.30pm, £12.50

★Stand-up Maddie Live

Bryan Ferry The swooning, crooning ex-working-class dude has been consistently touring as a solo artist and with his old band Roxy Music. He’s just released an excellent album of Dylan songs (Dylanesque), and there are rumours of the first Roxy Music album for 25 years, and the first to feature Brian Eno since 1973’s For Your Pleasure!

Brighton Dome, Tuesday 20 March, 7.30pm, £45/£35

★Music

Steve Winwood The mighty keyboardist and vocal giant from The Spencer Davis Group, Blind Faith and Traffic, best known for hits such as ‘Hole In My Shoe’ and ‘Gimme Some Lovin’’.

His intense period of superstardom from the mid-60s to the early 70s included playing keys on Hendrix’s legendary Electric Ladyland album.

He continues to enjoy the occasional hit such as the Arc Of A Diver album.

Concorde 2, Brighton, Wednesday 21 March, 8pm, £21.50

A mixture of chat, local music and comedy as Maddie Bridgett interviews her special guests, including Latest proprietor Bill Smith, for the Brighton-based TV talk show.

Hanbury Club, Brighton, Sunday 25 March, 7pm, £6/£4

★Theatre

★Music

My Chemical Romance Super successful American theatrical hardcore poppers who heavily lean on the macabre world of adult comics and horror movies.

This one is for the kids!

Brighton Centre, Wednesday 21 March, 6.30pm, £17.50

Daddy Fantastic

Sing-Along-A-Abba

Pete Bennett (Perfect Pete) used to be in this lot, a magnificent explosion of blues rock anarchy with mad lyrics and dodgy costumes. Pete probably misses them! Superb party ska band Los Albertos and punk rockers Breach are also on the bill.

The Lo Lounge, Friday 23 March, 8pm, £5

Poptastic cheese-fest. Magic moments party bags, fancy dress, Dancing Queen competition and all the Swedish supergroup’s hits performed by lookalikes.

Theatre Royal Brighton, Sunday 25 March 7.30pm, £17 For venue details see page 41 latest 7 33

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REVIEWS

Under review Recent shows with a sprinkling of homegrown talent U Roy and Junior Murvin Junior ‘Police and Thieves’ Murvin and URoy on the same bill – we were blessed indeed. Murvin’s sweet falsetto could charm the birds from the trees. The way he held the stage, with occasional imperious glares to the sound desk, was regal. Then came U-Roy, a bejewelled Dr John minus the silver cane. In a red suit and a black fedora, ‘The Originator’ treated us to some all-time original favourites including ‘Natty Rebel’ and ‘Babylon Burning’. Cool rulers, the pair of them.

Concorde 2, 5 March ✌✌✌✌✌

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Photography by Edward Moore

Easy Comedy A new monthly comedy show for only £3, with the money going to charity, and in the centre of town? Yup, and with local sensations like the sardonic Toby Whithouse, and with the surreal workings of Chris Pacey (pictured) and the hi-energy of Seann Walsh you just couldn’t go wrong.

But that wasn’t all, this line-up also showed off the lonely but funny in love Jim Holland and the everyman appeal of George Cleary.

All of this was lovingly strung together by our compere Lee Hume. This is set to be a monthly comedy night with new comics at each turn so it’s well worth keeping track of.

Very funny.

Easy Bar, 7 March ✌✌✌✌✌

Jan Goodey

Victoria Nangle

The Killers Hot fuss would be an understatement to the reaction of The Killers hitting this fair town. With the crowd whipped into a rhythmic frenzy of sweaty bodies, front man Brandon Flowers worked his magic like a lion tamer; with help from the boys to produce one of the most memorable nights the Brighton Centre has ever seen. With a performance way above standard, I was blown away. The Killers are cooler than ever and welcome back any time!

Brighton Centre, 3 March ✌✌✌✌

Jon Stringer

Shappi Khorsandi and new acts Compered by the wonderful Jo Enright, Matthew Ross opened the show in his affably engaging style.

Roisin Le Bourhis (pictured) followed with an exceptionally funny set, and we enjoyed a sterling turn from Steve Bustin. Toby Caldwell gave the night a surreal and physical twist and Evie Anderson dazzled with a subtitled aria about anal sex. Holly Walsh gave a great performance of her sardonic commentary. Headlining was the award-winning Shappi Khorsandi, who never fails to impress, and she brought the night to a close with the crowd laughing happily.

Comic Boom, Komedia, 28 February ✌✌✌✌

Chris Pacey

The Happiness They do exactly what it sounds like they’d do: they play happy music for happy people. The Happiness are a breath of fresh air in a sometimes dour scene.

Their amphetamine-fuelled sounds are born from the ashes off the post-punk scene, married to a disco-indie beat, with sprinklings of witty street poetry. They keep you on your toes this lot, with four of the band trading vocals, and have a totally infectious upbeat vibe on stage.

Audio, 10 March ✌✌✌✌

Jeff Hemmings

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tuesday 20 Henri Oguike Dance Company, Gardner Arts Centre, 8pm

Belgrave Executive Cars Business or Pleasure Corporate Hospitality Business Contracts Airports & Seaports Sporting Events Theatre Trips Pre-Booking Only Executive service at affordable prices Please contact us on

Tel: 01273 507798 Mob: 07973 324389

Live music Acoustic Open Mic Singer-songwriter evening Zoot, 8pm, £5 Archie Bronson Outfit + Alexander Tucker Psychedlic infused post indie complete with detuned guitars, tape loops and fx pedals.

Winner’s of this year’s South Bank Show Awards The Times’ Breakthrough Act. Audio, 7pm, £7.50 Bryan Ferry After lying low for much of the 90s Ferry has been consistently touring as a solo artist and with his old band Roxy Music. He’s just released an excellent album of Dylan songs (Dylanesque), and there are rumours of the first Roxy Music album for 25 years. Brighton Dome, 7.30pm, £45/£35 Duncan Howlett Sky Bar, 8pm, free Gooferdust Jazz and blues duo. Arthouse, 8.30pm, free Melody Club Fresh from Kylie in Europe, these happy popsters roll into town. Engine Room, 7.30pm, £6 My Luminaries + Stolen Monkey Pavement influenced outfit from Reading. Hope, 8pm, £5 Open mic The Brunswick, 8pm, free Open mic Black Horse, 9pm, free Revolution + Miss Pain + Scarlet Soho Electrolicious night. Pressure Point, 8pm, £4/£3 Silent Earth Superbly gentle soul-funk grooves from this local band who have a new album out soon. Joogleberry Playhouse, 8pm, £5 Thea Gilmore + Erin McKeown Since releasing her debut in 1998 Gilmore has blazed an independent trail with a string of wellreceived albums and a growing fanbase. The equally prolific McKeown has just released an album of forgotten Tin Pan Alley and Broadway classics, performed in her melancholy pop style.

Komedia, 8.30pm, £13/£11

Bars and clubs Above Audio Late bar, until 1am Ancient Mariner Late bar, until 1am Audio Snide: indie. 10pm–2am, £2 Arc Expelled. Student mash up.

10.30pm–3.30am, £2/£1 Belushi’s HusH: Vodka/mix and selected pints

only £1.25. 8pm–2am, free Caroline Of Brunswick Quiz with a difference: plasticine and drawing rounds.

8.30pm, £1 Casablanca Tequila Tuesday Cheap shots.

10.30pm–late, free Cosmopolitan Bar Open house – hang out at your new favourite local.

The Fiddler’s Elbow Late bar, until 2am The Fishbowl Late bar, until 2am The Globe Late bar, until 2am Koba Late bar, until 5am Hare & Hounds Free pool Po Na Na Pop R’n’B action. 10.30pm–3am, £5 Providence Curry & pint night with drink promos and table football. From 6pm Suga Qube Industry night – bar workers/door staff’s night off. Free The Zap Funkylicious. Funky house anthems.

10pm–3am, free

Gay Amsterdam 11am–11pm. Food served up to 8pm. Sauna 3pm–4am Aquarium 12pm–11pm Brighton Oasis Sauna. 12pm–12am Bright ’n’ beautiful Sauna. 12pm–10pm Bulldog 11am–2am Candy Bar 9pm–2am Charles Street Bar 12pm–11pm Legends Bar 11am–5am Legends Dance 11pm–4am, free Marine Tavern Nat’s quiz night 9pm.

12pm–12am Marlborough LGBT social. 12pm–12am Queen’s Arms Food, wi-fi access, and happy hour till 7pm. Spice up your life! The fabulous spice hosts her own karaoke show from 9pm.

2.30–11.30pm R-Bar Student night. Selected drinks £2 all night. 12pm–2am Revenge Student night. Drinks from £1.50.

NUS free all night/others free before 11 then £3, 10.30pm–3am Star Inn Food 12–3pm and 6–9pm.

11am–12am Vavoom Happy hour till 6pm. Open till 4am V2 club Music videos upstairs and karaoke downstairs until 12am. 10pm–late The Zone open 1pm–12am

Theatre Big Ballet A ballet of weighty elegance and adorable humour – classical and modern pieces performed by dancers each weighing no less than 220lb. A surprising and thrilling show.

The Capitol, Horsham, 8pm, £16/£15 Caught Part love story, part thriller. In 1609, while on the run for killing a man, Caravaggio paints a glorious nativity. Fast forward to 1969 and the Mafia steal the piece. A tale of two dark, violent lives centuries apart but connected by one painting. Komedia, Brighton, 8pm, £8/£10 French Without Tears Young Englishmen in the French Riviera find learning French easier than understanding women. Stylish revival of the touching 1930s comedy. Theatre Royal Brighton, 7.45pm, £15/£18/£21/£23 Henri Oguike Dance Company A mixed bill of expansive dancing and intuitive choreography.

Ages 11+. Gardner Arts Centre, 8pm, £12/14 William Shakespeare’s The Tempest Four plays by William Shakespeare performed over four consecutive nights, presented by students in their final year of Performing Arts at Sussex Downs College. Pavilion Theatre Brighton, 7pm (doors 6.15pm), £6/£3

Family and friends Brighton Rock For ages 2–5. Storytelling, a museum expedition, and handling of some museum objects based around a theme.

Brighton Museum, 10.30am–12pm, £4.50 British Art Course Event for ages 14+.

Worthing Museum, 10am–12.30pm, pre-booking required on 01903 221448 Drop In And Draw Handle some museum artefacts and then do some independent observational drawings from what you have seen.

Brighton Museum, 3.30–4.30pm, free Greyhound racing Enjoy an evening at the races with friends – place a bet or watch the action with a meal. Brighton and Hove Greyhound Stadium, call to confirm details Star Matched Speed Dating Unique speed dating evening with Instant Compatibility System. Will you find true love? Prior booking essential at www.starmatched.com. Al Duomo, Brighton, 7pm, £16

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wednesday 21 Le Grand Cirque, Eastbourne Congress Theatre, 7.30pm

Live music Andy Walker + support Weekly ‘Circle of Friends’ acoustic sets from talented local musicians. Cosmopolitan Bar, 8pm, free Conrad Vingoe Angelic singer with some fine songs. Vingoe recently won the FOPP Unsigned Award. More acts to be confirmed for this Brighton Stripped affair. Sussex Arts Club, 7.30pm, £tbc The Diamond Family Archive + The Great Park Achingly slow, quiet but mesmerising altcountry. It’s so desperate sounding and full of utter melancholy, and yet absolutely sublime and strangely beautiful. A Woodland recordings night. Marlborough Theatre, 8.30pm, £4/£3 Flamenco Tapas, sangria, live music and dancing. Joogleberry Playhouse, 01273 687171, 8pm, £4 Foy Vance Brilliantly expressive Irish/blues voice and a fine songwriter, almost like a male Joni Mitchell visiting the more mellow moments of Van Morrison. One to watch. The gig takes place in the Mint Leaf cafe which as well as a very fine eaterie the rest of the time is a gig venue (no food) on Wednesdays!! Mint, 8pm, £5 Fuji heavy + Zevicon + Friday Night heroes + Star Scream A White Noise rock night.

Pressure Point, 8pm, £4/£3 Ian Price Quartet Brunswick, 8pm, £4 The Legendary Bee’s Mouth Weekly open mic. Arthouse, 01273 770083, 8pm, free The Mighty Diamonds Sweet roots reggae with irresistible harmonies and insightful social consciousness from this Kingston band who emerged in the fertile 70s era. Komedia, 8.30pm, £15/£13.50 My Chemical Romance Super successful American theatrical hardcore poppers who heavily lean on the macabre world of adult comics and horror movies. This one is for the kids! Brighton Centre, 6.30pm, £17.50 Open Mic London Unity, 9pm, free The Silence Within + Dare Me + Two Gone Bad Pav Tav, 01273 770083, 8pm, free Steve Winwood The mighty keyboardist and vocal giant from Spencer Davis Group, Blind Faith and Traffic. No doubt he had an intense period of superstardom from the mid-60s to the early 70s but he has continued to enjoy the ocassional hit. Concorde 2, 8pm, £21.50 Wednesday Night Originals New bands night. Portland, 01273 383840, 9pm, £tbc

Bars and clubs Above Audio Late bar, until 1am Ancient Mariner Late bar, until 1am Arc Don’t Tell Ya Mum and Dad. Proper dance tunes. £3 10-2am Audio Supercharged. Breaks and beats. £4/£2 10-2am The Beach Born in the 80s Eighties tunes. £3/80p 10-late Casablanca Fun-ki Disco. Funky Sounds £2/£1/free 10-late Creation PureStudents. Stude-friendly tunes. £tbc Engine Room AM. Rock and indie. free 12-2am The Fiddler’s Elbow Late bar, until 2am The Fishbowl Late bar, until 2am Funky Buddha Lounge Sabotage. Indie rock stylings. £2 10.30-3am The Globe Late bar, until 2am Gloucester The Pit. Rock and metal. £3/£2 102 The Juggler Bar Quiz night – general and themed rounds. Prizes available. 8.30pm Koba Late bar, until 5am Ocean Rooms She Likes Parties. New wave indie. £4/£3/£1.50 10pm-late Penthouse Sounds From the Satellite Russian Disco. free £9pm-late Suga Qube Funk, soul and rare groove, free Volks Playgroup. Country to dark dub. £5/£4 103am The Zap Touch R and B plus Hip Hop. £3/£2 10.30pm-late

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Gay Amsterdam 11am-11pm. Food served up to 8pm.

Aquarium 12-11pm.

Brighton Oasis Sauna noon-12am Bright ’n’ Beautiful 12pm-10pm Charles Street Bar 12pm-11pm Marine Tavern 12pm-12am Marlborough Quiz – 8:30pm. Prizes for winners. 12pm-12am Queen’s Arms Food, wi-fi access and happy hour ’til 7pm. Andy B plus Davina Sparkle from 9pm. 2.30-11:30pm R-Bar Go double baby from 9pm, any double just £1 extra. 12pm-2am Revenge Strut your stuff at 1970s heaven. £2 before 11pm, £3 after. Free entry if dressed to theme. Selected drinks just £1.50. 10.30pm-3am Star Inn Food 12-3pm and 6-9pm. 12pm-12am Vavoom Happy hour ‘til 6pm. Your choice videos. Open ‘til 4am V2 Club Music videos upstairs and karaoke downstairs until 12am. 10pm-late.

Theatre Caught Part love story, part thriller: in 1609, while on the run for killing a man, Caravaggio paints a glorious nativity. Fast forward to 1969 and the Mafia steal the piece. A tale of two dark, violent lives centuries apart but connected by one painting. Komedia, Brighton, 8pm, £8/£10 French Without Tears Young Englishmen in the French Riviera find learning French easier than understanding women. Stylish revival of the touching 1930s comedy. Theatre Royal, Brighton, 7.45pm, £15/£18/£21/£23 Gigi Worthing Light Opera Company present a fantastic show featuring the tracks ‘I Remember It Well’, ‘Thank Heaven For Little Girls’ and more. Worthing Pavilion Theatre, 2.30pm and 7.30pm, £8.50/£9.50/£10.50 The Importance Of Being Earnest Eastbourne Operatic & Dramatic Society celebrate their centenary by presenting this

‘trivial comedy for serious people’. (Wilde) Eastbourne Devonshire Park, 7.30pm, £9/£10/£11 Le Grande Cirque Captivating and spellbinding show. See this breathtaking production featuring top artistes from around the globe.

Eastbourne Congress Theatre, 7.30pm, £17.50/£20/£22.50/£24.50 William Shakespeare’s Twelfth Night The second night of four William Shakespeare plays performed by students in their final year of Performing Arts at Sussex Downs College.

Pavilion Theatre.

Brighton Dome, 7pm, (doors 6.15pm) £6/£3

Family and friends Flamenco Enjoyable evening of dancing and music entertainment with tapas and sangria.

Joogleberry, 14–17 Manchester Street, Brighton. 8pm, £4 Greyhound Racing Afternoon races at the popular Hove venue. Relax in the Sprinters bar or eat at the trackside grill or The Skyline Restaurant which offers a perfect view of the racing. Brighton and Hove Greyhound Stadium.

01273 204601. Please call to confirm time. £4 (eve). Afternoon free Spring Equinox Open Ritual A special ceremony drawing on ancient magical techniques to welcome the rebirth of nature, helping to bring positive changes into your life.

Friends Meeting House, Ship Street, Brighton.

01273 307297, 7pm–10pm, £8/£10 advance, £10/£12 on the door. Under 12’s free.

Sussex History Course Adult event (14+). A chance to learn about local history. Pre-booking required on 01903 221448. Worthing Museum.

2pm–4.30pm Wednesday Night Wine Club Regular event at Pintxo People with Butlers Wine Cellar. Learn about different wines – how they are made, how to recognise quality and more. Price covers all the wine tasted and includes a £5 voucher for tapas. Pintxo People, 01273 732323, 7pm, £10

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thursday 22 Live music 12 Stone Toddler + Turning Green Titanic bill featuring the incredibly bouncy and dynamic Toddlers who are set to release their debut album in May. Meanwhile Turning Green are equally bouncy with some big riffs, acid-fried rhythms and an infectious stage presence. Komedia, 7.30pm, £8/£6 Are You Taking The Mic? Open mic night.

Prizes to be won. No covers, just originals. To register to play: andersdmoney@yahoo.co.uk.

Providence, 8pm, free Bedouin Soundclash + Young Soul Rebels Canadian trio last here with Gogol Bordello who mix reggae, ska, dub and rock that recalls postpunk bands such as The Police and Jamaican icons such as Lee ‘Scratch’ Perry and Junior Murvin. Komedia, 8pm, £11 Big Hand Superb four-piece with a ska slant who know how to rock the party thanks to their insanely upbeat stage presence, big tunes, and crossover appeal. Joogleberry Playhouse, 01273 687171, 8pm, £5 Electric Jam Session Portland Rock Bar, 01273 383840, 9pm, free The Fish Brothers Stupendous drinking band that regale all and sundry with punked up music hall triple XXX stories. A blinking institution. This is a pirate themed party. Caroline of Brunswick, 8pm, free Hank Wangford & Reg Meuross Lewes Folk Club featuring the twisted Godfather of British country music! Royal Oak, Lewes, 01273 478124, 8pm, £5 London Philharmonic Orchestra Joseph Wolfe conducts the music of Schubert, Sibelius and Saint-Saens. Dome, 01273 709709, 7.30pm, £32.50/ £27.50/ £23/ £18/ £15/ £10 Mama Hoochie Bang + Gordian Knot + Secret Fool Three bands as part of Holler! a new night of live music. Enigma, 10pm, £3 Nikolas Barrell & The Gin Club Album launch party for this folky pop local band. It’s the first release on the Folklaw label The Hope, 8pm, £tbc Open mic Fitzherberts, 8.30pm, free Open mic Hobgoblin, 8.30pm, free Open mic Freemasons, 8pm, free Open Mic For original music makers. Sign up by 8pm on the night. Cella, 8pm, £4 The Phonolites + The Milk & Honey Band + Penny Motel Cable Club night. Pressure Point, 8pm, £4/£3 Rock night Weekly rock bands with resident Zevicon and guests. Belushi’s, 9pm, free Sandweaver + The Great Outdoors + Breach Three up and coming local indie rock bands. Pav Tav, 01273 770083, 8pm, free Tin Cup Collective gritty and groovy harmonica blasting blues and jazz. Arthouse, 8.30pm, free The Velvet Lounge Ohso Social, 01273 746067, 8pm, free Wednesday 13 + 69 Eyes + McQueen Naming himself after Wednesday of The Addams Family, and the 1313 Mockingbird Lane fictional address of The Munsters, this former frontman of Murderdolls (real name: Joseph Poole) writes songs stemming almost solely from the lonely and pacifist medium of TV, mixed with garage, punk and swamp vibes. Brighton’s McQueen are an all-out ballsy girl metal band wih a new album out. Concorde 2, 7.30pm, £12.50

good enough to stay on, let them know! If not, vote them off, 7.30pm start, free Creation Floorfillers. Anthems. £2/ 90p Engine Room Rock Brighton. Live rock £3/£1.50 The Fiddler’s Elbow Late bar, until 2am The Fishbowl Late bar, until 3am Funky Buddha Lounge Warm Your Soul. Classic soul and funk. £2/ free 9-3am The Globe Late bar, until 3am Honeyclub Contagious. Classic house £4/ £2 10-late Koba Late bar, until 5am Pav Tav Sharp Kidz Indie tunes. £3/£1 10-late Po Na Na Back in the Day Old Skool hip hop. £3 10-2am Suga Qube Weekend warm-up with soulful and funky house. 9pm–2am, free Volks Dubpressure. Dubstep and grime. £tbc 10-3am Western Front Late bar until 3am The Zap Chopper Choons Kitsch and Cool tunes. £4/ free for NUS 10-3am

Gay Amsterdam Food served up to 8pm. Sauna 3pm-4am. 11am-11pm Aquarium 12-11pm Brighton Oasis Sauna 12pm-12am Bright’n’Beautiful Sauna 12-10pm Bulldog 11am-2am Candy Bar 9pm-2am, free Charles Street Club Religion. Hosted by Mother Superior Joan Bond with DJs Richard Jones and Tony B on the decks. £2 drinks promos. 10.30pm-3am, £4/£3 with flyer Harlequin 8pm-2am, free Legends Bar 11am-5am Legends Dance 11pm-4am, free Marine Tavern Man Trap. 12pm-12am.

Marlborough Free pool 6pm onwards.

12pm–12am The PV Vocktail v clittails: 6-9pm. 12pm-12am Queens Arms Food, wi fi access and happy hour till 7pm. 9pm: the q factor for anyone who can sing or think they can. First prize: £200 in final. Register at the bar by 9pm. The final heat!

Spirits + mixers £2 between 8 and 9pm.

R-Bar Cabaret with Maisie Trollette and John Bruzon at 9:30pm. 5-9pm happy hour. 12pm-2am Revenge Manzone is back by popular demand!

Strictly men only. Stripper from midnight.

10.30pm–3am, £2 entry and £2 drinks Star Inn Food served 12-3pm/6-8pm. 8.30pm: Big Dave’s quiz + buffet. 12pm-midnight Vavoom Thirsty Thursday, open till 4am. Music videos all night long.

V2 Club Music videos upstairs and karaoke downstairs until 1am. Karaoke ‘til midnight.

10pm-late The Zone 1pm-12am

Theatre

forward to 1969 and the Mafia steal the piece.

A tale of two dark, violent lives centuries apart but connected by one painting. Strong language.

The Hawth, Crawley, please call for show times and prices French Without Tears Young Englishmen in the French Riviera find learning French easier than understanding women. Stylish revival of the touching 1930s comedy. Theatre Royal, Brighton, 2.30pm and 7.45pm, £15/£18/£21/£23, matinee £15/£18 Gigi Worthing Light Opera Company present a fantastic show featuring the tracks ‘I Remember It Well’, ‘Thank Heaven For Little Girls’ and more. Worthing Pavilion Theatre, 7.30pm, £8.50/£9.50/£10.50 The Importance Of Being Earnest Eastbourne Operatic & Dramatic Society celebrate their centenary by presenting this ‘trivial comedy for serious people’. (Wilde) Eastbourne Devonshire Park, 2.30pm and 7.30pm, £9/£10/£11 Le Grande Cirque Captivating and spellbinding show. See this breathtaking production featuring top artistes from around the globe.Eastbourne Congress Theatre, 2.30pm and 7.30pm, £17.50/£20/£22.50/£24.50, matinee: £17.50/£19.50 The Play What I Wrote A celebration of Britain’s greatest double act, Morecambe and Wise. Hamish has written an epic play set in the French Revolution but Sean wants them to continue with their double act. Can they compromise? The Capitol, Horsham, 8pm, £15/£17 William Shakespeare’s A Midsummer Night’s Dream The third night of four performances by students in their final year of Performing Arts at Sussex Downs College.

Pavilion Theatre. Brighton Dome, 7pm (doors 6.15pm) £6/£3

Comedy The Mayday's Longform Class Showcase Student's from the highly respected Maydays Improv troupe bring you improvisation in the form of a one-act play inspired by the audience.

The Marborough Theatre, 8pm, £5

Family and friends Art and Craft Classes For children aged 18 months to five years old. A fun weekly arts and craft clas, letting youngsters explore their creativity. Malling Community Centre, Lewes.

For more info/ to book please call 01273 488616.

Greyhound Racing A great night out with friends at the races. Relax in the restaurant or bar and enjoy all the racing action. 01273 204601. Brighton and Hove Greyhound Stadium, evening race – please call to confirm time. £4

Caught In 1609, while on the run for killing a man, Caravaggio paints a glorious nativity. Fast

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Bars and clubs Above Audio Late bar, until 1am Ancient Mariner Late bar, until 1am Arc Dance Like a Dickhead. DJs and bands. free 10-2am Audio Dynamite Boogaloo. Legendary pop/kitsch night. £4/£3 10-2am Bar Bamboogy Live DJs. 8pm–2am, free Belushi’s Rock bar, £1.50 vodka/mix and selected pints £2. 8pm–2am, free Brighton Gloucester Mad For It. Indie. £3/£1.50 10-2am Casablanca Sambation. Sunny Brazilian flavours. £2/£1 9.30-2am Cosmopolitan Bar Spinner stays on – If the DJ’s

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friday 23 and Katie. 2.30pm–1am R–Bar Official Lollipop warm–up, 5–9pm happy hour. 12pm–12am Revenge Lollipop Vs Kinky Dangerous. DJ Dulcie Danger banging away upstairs with the fabulous Lollipop Girls hosting downstairs.

10.30pm-5am, £5 before 11pm, £7 after.

Rehab Therapy. 9pm–4am Star Inn Food 12pm-3pm and 6pm-9pm. FBI: Friday Bears Inc from 9pm with guest DJ. Bear weekend begins! 11am-1am Vavoom Bar Boyz. Promos till 6pm and when certain tracks play. Dance music videos all night Open ‘til 6am.

V2 club open 10pm-late. Music videos upstairs and karaoke downstairs until 12am. Members free.

The Zone 1pm–midnight

Heavenly massage Warm hospitality A peaceful environment An unforgettable experience Male & female therapists

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Theatre

Salsa Celtica, Komedia, 8.30pm

Live music Daddy Fantastic + Los Albertos + Breach Pete Bennett (Perfect Pete) used to be in this lot, a magnificent explosion of blues rock anarchy with mad lyrics and dodgy costumes.

Los Albertos are an awesome ska-based hornblasting party band, while Penny Dreadful’s Breach sound like its 1977 all over again. Lo Lounge, 9pm, £tbc Dirty Vendetta + Mama Hoochie Bang + Dirty Shoes Portland, 9pm, £3 Driven To Collision 14+ ages show. Pressure Point, 7.30pm, £4/£3 Elvis In Concert If Only!! Then again, goats may play lacrosse. Assembly Hall, Worthing, 8pm, £15.50-£13.50 F.N.U.K. Local vintage hard-funking band.

Brunswick, 8pm, £3 Jim Hart’s Gemini Brighton Jazz Club Sussex Arts Club, 7.30pm, £10/£8 John Connolly Entertaining sea shanties and characterful folk songs.The Beachcomber, Seaford Folk Club, time and £tbc John Etheridge World class guitarist with a long history of major collaborations. He’s currently working with John Williams as a duo.

As a solo artist, he performs a mix of jazz, folk, blues and African grooves. He’ll be playing along with another great six-stringer, Kit Holmes. There’s a pre-gig workshop as well for all you guitar hopefuls. Clair Hall, Haywards Heath, 8pm, £10/£9 (£12/£11 incl workshop, £5 workshop only) Kingsomniac + Les Ruprettes Superb skainfluenced upbeat alt-rockers from Brighton.

Providence, 8pm, £1 The Mentalists + Disco Lips Of Blood Allgirl pop-punkers.Engine Rooms, 8pm, £4 The Rumble Strips Massively tipped four piece who sound like a marriage of early Dexy’s Midnight Runners and old time rock ’n’ roll.

Audio, 7pm, £tbc Salsa Celtica Fusing fiery and exuberant AfroCuban rhythms with the whirl and skirl of Scottish bagpipes and fiddles and hot jazz riffs.

Brilliantly upbeat and infectious live act.

Komedia, 8.30pm, £12.50/£10 S.R.V. Tribute to Stevie Ray Vaughan. Neptune, 8.30pm, £free Three Plus One Jazz, latin and soul covers outfit featuring sax man Jeff Howlett, bassist Keith Baxter, guitarist John Harris and singer Ela Southgate. Joogleberry Playhouse, 8pm, £6 Ukes Of Hazzard Ukulele band with songs to make you smile. Mint, 8pm, £free

Bars and clubs Above Audio Late bar, until 2am Ali Cats Bar Flow. Electro, breaks and booty bass. 8pm–12am, free Ancient Mariner Late bar, until 2am Aqua Bar 70s, 80s and 90s hits, 9pm–2am, free Arc Candy. Hip hop, soul and ragga with Pit

Bull. 10.30pm–4am, £8/£5 Audio Positive Sounds. Underground free party beats. 11pm–4am, £8/£7 Beach Undiluted. End-of-term session with commercial drum and bass.10.30pm-3am, £10/£8 Belushi’s Madness. Sexy chart cheese and club classics. £2 selected drinks until midnight.

10pm–3am Casablanca Mirror Ball. Funky disco.10.30pm3am, £6/£5/£4 Concorde 2 So Loud. With Kavinsky and Nightmoves. 10pm-late, £8/£6 Creation Glitter Baby. R’n’B and house.

9.30pm-3am, £6/£4 Engine Rooms Deviant. Goth, industrial and indie. 11pm-3am, £5/£4, The Fiddler’s Elbow Late bar, until 3am The Fishbowl Late bar, until 2am Funky Buddha Lounge Thank Funk It’s Friday.

Feel the funk. 10pm-3am, £8/£6 Funky Buddha Lounge Unkool vs Pork Chop Express. Breaks and electro special. 3-8am, £8/£5 The Globe Late bar, until 3am Gloucester Kick Out The Jams. Indie. 10.30pm2am, £4/£3 Honeyclub The Gallery. Acclaimed London soiree with Sean Tyas.10pm-4am, £tbc Koba 24 hour bar!

Komedia Born Bad. Psyche, garage and rock ‘n’ roll action. 11pm-3am, £6/£5 Lo Lounge The House Sessions. Quality house with regular guests. 10pm-3am, £5 Ocean Rooms The Getaway presents… Hard house and nu-NRG. 11pm-4am, £8 Pav Tav Rip It Up. Indie anthems. 10pm-2am, £4/£3 Riki Tik Late bar, until 3.30am Suga Qube Sexy soulful house. 9pm, £free Volks Autopsy. Dark drum and bass. 11pm-5am, £7 Western Front Late bar until 3am The Zap Oceantribe presents Raucous. Grinding techno with Aaron Liberator. 10pm-late, £7

Gay Amsterdam Sauna: 3pm–6am. 11am–5am Aquarium 12pm–1am Brighton Oasis Sauna open 24 hours!

Bright ’n’ Beautiful Sauna 12pm–10pm Bulldog 11am–late Candy Bar Pop Rocks Vs Booty Call. 9pm–late Charles Street Bar Mad Cow. Cheesy, camp tracks from 10.30pm with DJs Ruby Roo and Connie Conway.

Charles Street Club Revo. New funky electro club night with DJ Tom Logan 10.30pm–3am, £5 Harlequin 9pm-4am, free Legends Bar 11am–5am Legends Dance 11pm–4am, £5 Marine Tavern 12pm–12am.

Marlborough Live DJ playing some top ‘choons’ from 9pm. 12pm–2am Queen’s Arms Food, wi-fi access and happy hour ’til 7pm. Andy B’s Camp Attack with Babs

French Without Tears Young Englishmen in the French Riviera find learning French easier than understanding women. Stylish revival of the touching 1930s comedy.

Theatre Royal, Brighton, 7.45pm, ££24/£22/£19/£16 Gigi Worthing Light Opera Company present a fantastic show featuring the songs ‘I Remember It Well’, ‘Thank Heaven For Little Girls’ and more.

Worthing Pavilion Theatre, 7.30pm, £10.50/£9.50/£8.50 The Importance Of Being Earnest Eastbourne Operatic And Dramatic Society celebrate their centenary by presenting this ‘trivial comedy for serious people’. (Wilde) Eastbourne Devonshire Park, 7.30pm, £11/£10/£9 Kinder Transport Moving and powerful play about nine-year old Eva who moves to Manchester on the outbreak of World War II, changes her name and buries memories of her past life, but the past resurfaces when her own daughter discovers letters locked in the attic.

Ages 12+, Gardner Arts Centre, 8pm, £14/£12 Le Grande Cirque Captivating and spellbinding show. See this breathtaking production featuring top artistes from around the globe.

Eastbourne Congress Theatre, 7.30pm, £26/£24/£22/£20 The Play What I Wrote A celebration of Britain’s greatest double act, Morecambe and Wise. Hamish has written an epic play set in the French Revolution but Sean wants them to continue with their double act. Can they compromise?

The Capitol, Horsham, 8pm, £17/£15 Seussical A musical extravaganza featuring favourite Dr Seuss characters. Join the cat in the hat on an imaginative journey.

Eastbourne Royal Hippodrome, 2.30pm and 7.30pm, £9 William Shakespeare’s Hamlet The final Shakespeare play performed by students in their final year of Performing Arts at Sussex Downs College. Pavilion Theatre, 7pm (doors 6.15pm) £6/£3

Comedy Kronenbourg Krater Comedy Club Leave the worries of the week behind you right here, with the help of established funny men Geoff Norcott, Jason Rouse and Owen O'Neill. MC duty tonight is taken up by the very special Jon Richardson. Komedia, 7.30pm, £12/£10

Family & Friends Spring Has Sprung For ages 2–5. Storytelling, a museum expedition, and handling of some museum objects based around a theme. Booth Museum, 10.30am–12pm, £4.50

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saturday 24 Live music Alex Wilson’s Salsa Orchestra Cool jazz licks and seductive salsa grooves from this master pianist, band leader and his large ensemble.

Corn Exchange, 9pm, £12.50 (free pre-show salsa class, 7.30pm) The Blues Corporation Big soul and blues covers band. Brunswick, 8.30pm, £tbc Carmina Burana Boundstone College Choir present Carl Orff’s choral masterpiece.

Assembly Hall, Worthing, 7.30pm, £10/£5 Cela Torch And Matt Wall Mellow vocal jazz Mint, 8pm, £free Dates + Pope Of Pop + Stingo Ra Debut album launch for this Brighton band who feature one Bob Grover amongst their ranks – he, of course, scored an actual number one with The Piranhas back in the 80s. Providence, 8pm, £1 Deeply Purple Portland, 9pm, £4 Groanbox Boys Foot-stompin’ accordion and banjo/guitar based old-time blues and folk duo playing at the venue set up by musicians Jane Bom Bane and Nick Pynn. Bom Bane’s, 8pm, £tbc Ill Ease + The Dirty Portland, 9pm, £3 Kate Nash + Peggy Sue And The Pirates Everyone is talking about the new talent Nash, part of the new wave of story-telling tunesmiths á la Lily Allen. Like a lo-fi version of Regina Spektor there is an overwhelming child-like quality to everything about her, from her artwork, to her lyrics to her music. SOLD OUT. Red Roaster, 8pm, £6 Lunchtime Jazz Komedia, 12.45pm, £free Matt English + Lana McDee + Armando Folk and blues man who loves the old style songs of Woody Guthrie et al. Cella, 7.30pm, £5 Michael Ball Master of cover songs who has carved out a hugely successful career via the West End. Brighton Centre, 8pm, £29 The Myna Morgans Soul/pop swing covers band led by the divine vocals of George Williams and keyboardist Robin Coward. Expect high standard interpretations of Billie Holiday, Beck, David Bowie, The Beatles and more.

Joogleberry, 8pm, £7 One Night With Elvis He really does turn up in the most unlikely of places. Hove Centre, 7pm, £16.50/£15.50 Tragic Roundabout Marvellous ska, swing, dixie and music hall hybrid from this longestablished Brighton band. Caroline Of Brunswick, 8pm, free

Bars and clubs Above Audio Late bar, until 2am Ali Cats Bar Uni-Fi. Nu-skool and old-skool breaks, 8pm–12am, free Ancient Mariner Late bar, until 2am Aqua Bar Resident DJ 9pm–2am, free Arc Hold Up! Popular indie night with regular special guests. 10pm-4am, £5 Audio Stompa Phunk. Underground house with Underwater Records. 11pm-4am, £tbc Beach Fever. Disco and funk.10.30pm-4am, £10/£8 Belushi’s Utopia: 80s classics and club anthems. £2 selected drinks until midnight.

10pm–3am Caroline Of Brunswick Alternative 80s night 9pm–1am, free Concorde 2 Devotion. Jungle with Randall and Dillinja. 11pm-4am, £7 Core Club Mo Money. Hip hop with Bill Blast.

10pm-4am, £8/£5 Engine Rooms Lowlife. Goth, 80s, indie and electro. 11pm-3am, £5 The Fiddler’s Elbow Late bar, until 3am The Fishbowl Late bar, until 3am Funky Buddha Lounge Buddha Soul. Soulful and funky tunes. £10/£7 10pm-3am Funky Buddha Lounge La Manana. After hours action. 3pm-8am, £8 The Globe Late bar, until 3am Gloucester Monkey. The Wild Fruit folks’ Saturday nighter. 10pm-4am, £9/£7/£5 Honey Club Seven Sins. Funky big room house

with Eddie Halliwell. 10.30pm-5am, £12/£7 Jazz Place Street Jazz. Uplifting funk and Afro.

10.30pm-2am, £6/£5 Koba 24 hour bar!

New Madeira Hotel Funky Fish Club. Funk, soul and jazz. £4 before 11pm/£5 after Ocean Rooms Pimpbitchdisko. Cut and paste dancefloor action. 11pm-4am, £5 Ocean Rooms Blow. Electro DJs. £7/£6/£5 3.30am-early Pressure Point Ooga-Booga. Minimal acid and electro. 12-4am, £5 Pav Tav Mod For It. Mod action. 10pm-2am, £5/£4 Riki Tik Late bar, until 3.30am Sussex Arts Club We Luv Pop. This week it’s We love: 60s and 70s pop. 10.30pm-2am, £6/£5 Volks Ajuca Box. Springy Psytrance. 11pm-4am, £tbc Western Front Late bar until 3am Zap Front Of House. Upfront funky electro.

11pm-4am, £10/£8

Gay Amsterdam 11am-2am. Sauna 3pm-4am Aquarium 12pm-11pm.

Brighton Oasis Sauna 12pm-7am Bright’n’Beautiful Sauna 12pm-10pm Bulldog 11am-late.

Candy Bar St Patrick’s day girl/boy auction.

8pm-morning. £3 before 10/£5 after.

Charles Street Bar 12pm-late.

Charles Street Club Passion. 2 floor special with DJs Queen Josephine and Lil’ Alex. 11pm3am, £3 The Gloucester Monkey. Brighton’s favourite DJs playing some top tunes.10pm-4am, NUS £5 all night, others £5 before 11pm/£7 before midnight/£9 after. Drinks promos.

Harlequin 10.30pm: Sophie on stage. 9pm4am, free before 11pm/£2 before 12/£5 after Legends Bar Pre-ignition.11am-5am.

Legends Dance Ignition. 11pm-4am.

Marine Tavern 12pm-12am.

Marlborough 9pm: live DJ playing some top choons. 12pm-2am The PV DJ Dubbledee from 9pm. 12pm-1am.

Queen’s Arms Food, wi-fi access and happy hour ’til 7pm. 9pm: Julie Glitter’s karaoke party.

2:30pm-1am. Info: www.queensarmsbrighton.com R-Bar Open 24hrs! Pop videos all night. Great food all day. Discount tickets for Revenge available.

Revenge Downstairs: Queercarnage with DJs Dusty O and Nik C. Upstairs: DJ Richard Jones.

All drinks £2 before 12. 10:30pm-6am, free before 11pm/£5 before 12am/£7 after 12am/£3 after 3am. NUS £3.

Star Inn Food 12pm-6pm. Proud To Bear night 9pm. 11am-1am Vavoom open ‘til 6am. Tonight: ‘Superheroes’ theme with free shots, promos and dance videos all night. Free drink if you drag up!

V2 Club open from 10pm-late. ‘Superheroes’ party continues with pole dancing contest.

Karaoke until midnight. Members get free entry.

The Zone 1pm-12am

Theatre Double Bill: The Interview/ Agape’s Excess A hilarious black comedy set in an office, followed by a play exploring the dark side of relationships. New Venture Theatre, 7.45pm, please call for prices French Without Tears Young Englishmen in the French Riviera find learning French easier than understanding women. Stylish revival of the touching 1930s comedy. Theatre Royal, Brighton, 2.30pm and 7.45pm, £24/£22/£19/£16, matinee: £23/£21/£18/£15 Gigi Worthing Light Opera Company present a fantastic show featuring the songs ‘I Remember It Well’, ‘Thank Heaven For Little Girls’ and more. Worthing Pavilion Theatre, 2.30pm and 7.30pm, £8.50/£9.50/£10.50 The Importance Of Being Earnest Eastbourne Operatic And Dramatic Society celebrate their centenary by presenting this ‘trivial comedy for serious people’. (Wilde) Eastbourne Devonshire Park, 2.30pm and 7.30pm, £11/£10/£9 Kinder Transport Moving and powerful play about nine-year old Eva who moves to Manchester on the outbreak of World War II, changes her name and buries memories of her past life, but the past resurfaces when her own daughter discovers letters locked in the attic.

Ages 12+, Gardner Arts Centre, 8pm, £14/£12 Le Grande Cirque Captivating and spellbinding show. See this breathtaking production featuring top artistes from around the globe. Eastbourne Congress Theatre, 2.30pm and 7.30pm, £26/£24/£22/£20, matinee: £26/£24/£22.50/£20/£17.50 The Play What I Wrote A celebration of Britain’s greatest double act, Morecambe and Wise. Hamish has written an epic play set in the French Revolution but Sean wants them to continue with their double act. Can they compromise? The Capitol, Horsham, 2.30pm and 8pm, £14 (mat) £17/£15 Seussical A musical extravaganza featuring favourite Dr Seuss characters. Join the cat in the hat on an imaginative journey. Eastbourne Royal Hippodrome, 2.30pm and 7.30pm, £9

Comedy Kronenbourg Krater Comedy Club Settle into the weekend with laughter, with the help of established funny men Geoff Norcott, Jason Rouse and Owen O'Neill. MC duty tonight is taken up by the very special Jon Richardson.

Komedia, 7pm and 10.30pm, £16 Club Boothby Mixing music with comedy, Boothby Graffoe, the ever-popular performer of stage, radio, TV and regularly The Komedia, infects you with his laid-back and comfortable style. Bringing together the man himself, the house band and special guests, it's gonna be a good night. Komedia, 7.30pm, £12.50

Family and friends

Kate Nash, Red Roaster, 8pm

Enjoy the KOBA ‘Happy hour’ Two cocktails for the price of one between 5-7pm every day in the front bar. Apply for free K-list membership at wwww.kobauk.com

Annual Workshop Day Evolution Dance host a special workshop with the morning aimed at beginners wishing to move up to intermediate and the afternoon aimed at those who have been dancing longer. Drop in for an hour segment, a half day or the whole day, making up any com bination of options you wish. Lancing Parish Hall, South Street, Lancing, www.evolutiondance.co.uk, from 10am Badger Weekend At Foredown Tower Learn about the badger and its ecology, ask questions and view the equipment used in a badger rescue. All ages. For more info call the Badger Trust Hotline on 07910 198720. Foredown Tower, Foredown Road, Portslade, 10am4:30pm, free

Functions rooms available for all kinds of parties of 10-190 guests Free venue hire Sunday – Thursday contact info@kobauk.com or call Tel: 01273 720059

135 Western Road, Brighton BN1 2LA www.kobauk.com

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sunday 25 Live music Acoustic Jam Session Portland, 01273 383840, 9pm, free Badlands Guitar Best of Brighton bands competition sponsored by Badlands Guitar. Heat 2. Pressure Point, 8pm, £1 Boogaloo Stu Performing live at his own weekly club, expect some delicious disco-pop anthems that veer this side of outright kitsch.

Part of Boogaloo Stu’s Cavalcade of Pop club night. Po Na Na, 10pm, £3.50 Lana McDee + Boy Patient + Square Dancing Punk Pav Tav, 01273 770083, 8pm, free The Legacy Engine Rooms, 7.30pm, £4 Liz Simcock Horsham Folk Club. Horsham Folk Club, The Normandy Centre, Horsham, 01306 875653, 8pm, Richard & Cela Jazz guitar and vocal duo.

Brunswick, 3pm, free Terry Seabrook Jazz pianist Seabrook plays with guitarist Andy Williams. The White Horse, Steyning, 1pm, free Paula & The Interlopers + Ivan Cella, 7.30pm, £5 Sam Chara Jazz vocalist.The Neptune Inn, 8.30pm, free

Bars and clubs Above Audio Late bar, until 1am Ancient Mariner Late bar, until 1am Cosmopolitan Bar The Full Moon pub quiz and Sunday roasts. Quiz starts 7.30pm, roasts from 1–6pm The Fishbowl Gone Fishing. Jazz, reggae and soul sounds. 6pm, free The Fiddler’s Elbow Late bar, until 2am The Globe Late bar, until 2am Honey Club Sundelicious. Funky techno. £3/£1 11pm-4am Koba 24 hour bar!

Koo Klub Cash Queen Sexy Sunday soiree. £7/5 10.30-3am Po Na Na Cavacade of Pop! Non stop pop. £3 10-late Suga Qube Carry-on Sunday, free Zap Sunday School. Funky tribal house. £4 10late

Gay Amsterdam Sauna 3pm-5am. 11am–12.30am.

Aquarium 12pm-11pm.

Audio Sunday Sundae. 9pm–late, £4 before 10, £6 after.

Brighton Oasis Sauna 12pm–12am.

Bulldog 11am–2am.

Candy Bar Sirens. 9pm-3am, £5/£3.50.

Charles Street Bar 12pm-10.30pm.

Legends Bar 11am-5am. 3pm. Kandi kane as laquisha jonz Legends Dance Embrace 11pm–4am, free.

Marine Tavern 12pm–12am.

Marlborough Sunday mega-roast lunches noon-7pm + live music. 12pm-12am The PV Live music 6pm. 12pm–11pm.

Queen’s Arms Super Sunday! Cabaret with Lola Lasagne at 5.15pm, then Betty’s karaoke show. 2.30pm–11pm R-Bar Cabaret on stage at 4.30pm, happy hour 6–9pm. Till 2am.

Revenge All pints £2. 10.30pm–3am. £2 before midnight then £3.

Star Inn Sunday lunches till 4pm then bears’ beer bash with charity raffle & big bears’ buffet! Bear weekend concludes.

Noon–11pm Vavoom Chill out music videos all day. Till 3am The Zone 1pm-12am.

Comedy Kronenbourg Krater Comedy Club Don't let the weekend end. Geoff Norcott, Jason Rouse and Mike Gunn will make you laugh this Sunday night. MC’ing is conducted by the ever-

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entertaining Stephen Grant. Komedia, 8pm, £9/£6 students Luke Wright: Poet Laureate After a brilliant run at last year's Edinburgh Fringe this young poet/comic brings his wares to Brighton's creative shores. Komedia, 6.45pm, £8/£5 Sidesplitters Helmut headlines, with an opening set from Rosie Wilby and fantastic support from new acts Netty Wendt and Mike Switzer, a great night should be had by all. The Providence, 8pm, £4 Maddie Live A mixture of chat, local music and comedy as Maddie Bridgett interviews her special guests, including Latest proprietor Bill Smith, for the Brighton-based TV talk show.

Hanbury Ballroom, 7pm, £6/£4

Live music

Theatre

Above Audio Late bar, until 1am Ancient Mariner Late bar, until 1am Beach We Love 90s. Tunes from way back when. £2/90p 10.30pm-3am Belushis Eccentric, eclectic and mostly electric. 9pm–2am, £2 selected drinks. £2 entry.

Casablanca Now That’s What I Call the Eighties. free 10.30pm-3am Cosmopolitan Bar Parlour Games. Bring your own games or choose from the selection.

The Fiddler’s Elbow Late bar, until 2am The Fishbowl Late bar, until 2am The Globe Late bar, until 2am Honey Club Stardust versus Corrosion. Cheese and rock double header, 11pm-4am, £4.50/£1.50 Koba Late bar until 5am Suga Qube 2-4-1 on cocktails, 5pm–2am Volks Tip Top present Strictly Reggae.

Dancehall, basement and roots. £4.50/3.50 10-late

Double Bill: The Interview/ Agape’s Excess A hilarious black comedy set in an office followed by a play exploring the dark side of relationships. New Venture Theatre, 2.30pm Le Grande Cirque Captivating and spellbinding show. See this breathtaking production featuring top artistes from around the globe. Eastbourne Congress Theatre, 2.30pm and 7.30pm, £20/£22/£24/£26, matinee: £17.50/£20/£22.50/£24/£26 Russian Cossack State Dance Company Direct from Moscow, with 50 dancers, musicians and singers – a dynamic production packed with energy and excitement. Worthing Pavilion Theatre, 7.30pm, £18/£19.50/£21 Sing-Along-A-Abba The Swedish bands hits performed live on stage with a special screen displaying the words for the audience to join in too! A party bag for everyone, fancy dress, Dancing Queen competition and great music.

Theatre Royal, Brighton, 7.30pm, £17 Tom Thumb A scary ogre head, flying fiery houses and a portable forest – this is a tale about being afraid – performed entirely on a kitchen table with the wee wonder Tom Thumb.

Ages 6+. Komedia, Brighton, 2pm, £6

Family and friends Badger Weekend At Foredown Tower Learn about the badger and its ecology, ask questions and view the equipment used in a badger rescue. All ages. For more info call the Badger Trust Hotline on 07910 198720. Foredown Tower, Foredown Road, Portslade, 10am–4.30pm, free (entry charge for viewing gallery) Club Paradiso A monthly event for children to explore the world of food. Previous sessions included the kids helping to make chocolate chip cookies with the chef and crew. Parents can come along, relax or take charge! This month’s event includes Easter Egg painting! Book a family table on 01273 679799. Restaurant Paradiso, The Seattle Hotel, Brighton Marina, from 12.30pm.

Greyhound Racing Afternoon races at the popular Hove venue.Brighton and Hove Greyhound Stadium. 01273 204601. Please call to confirm time. Free Maddie Live Join Maddie Bridgett, host of Brighton’s first ever variety TV chat show as she gets up close and personal with owner of Momma Cherri Charita Jones, Leticia and Latest’s very own Bill Smith on his recent event The Life and Death Orchestra for Holocaust Memorial Week. The Hanbury Club, 83 St George’s Road, Kemp Town, 7pm doors, 7.30pm show, £4/£6 Postman Pat Everyone’s favourite postman visits Drusillas Park in a special event today.

Drusillas Park, Alfriston, East Sussex, BN26 5QS, 01323 874100, 10am–4pm, under 2’s go free, standard tickets from £12.20, to a family ticket for five priced £56 Natural Forms Day two of the workshop for children aged 7+ and their parents. Be inspired by the Alice Maher exhibition, creating sculptures from wire and natural objects.

Brighton Museum, 1pm–4.50pm, £10

Can U Joogle? Open mic acoustic showcase.

Drop in a demo to Carly, headed Can U Joogle?

Joogleberry, 8pm, free Josh Pyke Antifolk legend with heartfelt songs.

Engine Rooms, 7.30pm, £tbc Richard Durrant Classically trained multiinstrumentalist known for his lively and entertaining guitar concerts that feature plenty of experimentation. The Ravenswood, Sharpthorne, 01342 302000, 8pm, £12/£10

Bars and clubs

Gay Aquarium 12pm–11pm.

Bulldog 11am–2am.

Candy Bar Shibby Shabblers. 10pm–2am.

Charles Street Bar 12pm–11pm Charles Street Club Studio 150. With DJs Luke Smith & Ali K. Drinks from £1.50.

10.30pm–3am, £1.50 Legends Bar 11am–5am.

Legends Dance Mojo. 11pm–4am, free Marine Tavern Elsie’s Chill, 12pm–12am Marlborough Games social night from 6pm.

Games, pool & tunes. 12pm–12am.

The PV 12pm–12am.

Queen’s Arms Food, wi-fi access and happy hour ‘til 7pm. Cassidy’s Climax, 9pm – a new way to start the week. 2.30pm–11.30pm.

R-Bar Food 12–8pm and happy hours 5–9pm.

Miss Jason’s Madhouse at 9.30pm.

12pm–2am Revenge Boogaloo Stu’s Shinky Shonky.

Free entry all night and all drinks just £2.

10.30pm–3am.

Star Inn Food served 12–3pm & 6–9pm.

11am–12am.

Vavoom Till 4am.

The Zone 1pm–12am.

Comedy Ricky Gervais: Fame The modest one returns with his sell out raconteur show. Brighton Centre, 7.30pm, £25

Theatre Russian Cossack State Dance Company Direct from Moscow, a show filled with energy and passion.Eastbourne Congress Theatre, 7.30pm, £18/£19.50/£21 The Unexpected Guest Agatha Christie Theatre Company are back with a new production: A man lost in the fog stumbles across a home, but seeking refuge, he comes across a murder. Compelling and filled with suspense, an enticing whodunnit mystery.Wed & Sat mats. Eastbourne Devonshire Park, 7.45pm, £13.50/£16/£18

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A-Z venue directory Brighton and Hove Ali Cats 80 East Street, Brighton 01273 220902 Amsterdam 11 Marine Parade 01273 688825 www.amsterdam.uk.com Aqua 23 Waterfront Brighton Marina 01273 819800 Aquarium 6 Steine Street, Brighton 01273 605525 www.pleisure.com Arc 160 Kings Road Arches 01273 770505 Arthouse Gallery 10 Western Road, Hove 01273 770083 Audio 10 Marine Parade 01273 606906 www.audiobrighton.com Bar Bamboogy 78 West Street, Brighton www.creationbrighton.com Barley Mow 92 St George’s Road 01273 682259 The Beach 171–181 Kings Road Arches, Brighton 01273 722272 Belushi’s 10-12 Grand Junction Road, Brighton 01273 202035 Brighton Centre Kings Road, Brighton 0870 900 9100 www.brightoncentre.co.uk Brighton College Eastern Road www.brightoncollege.net Brighton Dome 29 New Road, Brighton 01273 709709 www.brighton-dome.org.uk Brighton Gloucester 27 Gloucester Place 01273 688011 Brighton and Hove Greyhound Stadium Nevill Road, Hove 01273 204601 www.trap6.com/hove Brighton Museum & Art Gallery Royal Pavilion Gardens, 01273 290900 Brighton Peace & Environment Centre Brighton Ecocentre, 39–41 Surrey Street 01273 766610 Brighton Rocks 6 Rock Place 01273 601139 Brighton Women’s Centre 72 High Street, Brighton 01273 698036 The Brunswick 1 Holland Road, Hove 01273 733984 Bulldog, 31 St James’s Street 01273 696996 www.bulldogbrighton.com Candy Bar 129 St James’s Street 01273 622424 www.thecandybar.co.uk Caroline of Brunswick 39 Ditchling Road, Brighton 01273 624434 Casablanca Middle Street, Brighton 01273 321817 Cella at Sanctuary Café 51–55 Brunswick St East, Hove 01273 770006 Charles Street Bar & Club 8 Marine Parade 01273 624091 www.charlesstreetbar.com Cineworld Brighton Marina Village 01273 818094 www.cineworld.co.uk Clair Hall Perrymount Road, Haywards Heath 01444 455440 Concorde 2 Madeira Drive, Brighton 01273 673311 www.concorde2.co.uk Core Club 12–15 King’s Road, Brighton 01273 326848 Cornerstone Community Centre Church Road, Hove 01273 327757 Cosmopolitan Bar 29-31 New Steine 01273 682461 The Cowley Club 12 London Road, Brighton 01273 696104 www.cowleyclub.org.uk Creation 78 West Street, Brighton 01273 321628 www.creationbrighton.com Doctor Brighton’s 16–17 Kings Road 01273 328765 www.pleisure.com Duke of York’s Picturehouse Preston Circus, Brighton 01273 626261 www.picturehouses.co.uk Education Room Brighton Pavilion 01273 296971 Engine Room 5 Preston Street, Brighton 01273 728999 www.engineroomclub.com Enigma 10 Ship Street, Brighton 01273 328439 www.theenigmabrighton.co.uk The Fishbowl 74 East Street 01273 777505 Fitzherberts 25 New Road 01273 682401 Freebutt 1 Phoenix Place 01273 603974 Freemasons 38 Western Road, Hove 01273 732043 Funky Buddha Lounge 169–170 Kings Road Arches, Brighton 01273 725541 Gap Club 61a Western Road, Hove 0844 999 6349 Gardner Arts Centre, University of Sussex campus, Falmer 01273 685861 www.gardnerarts.co.uk The George 5 Trafalgar Street, Brighton 01273 681055 The Greys 105 Southover Street, Brighton 01273 680734 The Hanbury Club 83 St George’s Road, Brighton 01273 605789 Hare & Hounds 75 London Road, Brighton 01273 681163 Harlequin 43 Providence Place, Brighton 01273 620630 www.harlequin-brighton.co.uk

Hobgoblin 31 York Place, Brighton 01273 602519 Honeyclub 214 Kings Road Arches, 01273 202807 www.thehoneyclub.co.uk The Hope 10–12 Queen’s Road, Brighton 01273 325793 Hove Museum & Art Gallery 194 Church Road, Hove 01273 290200 Hove Town Hall, Norton Road, Hove 0870 900 9100 www.brighton-hove.gov.uk Jazz Place 10 Ship Street, Brighton 01273 328439 www.thejazzplacebrighton.co.uk Joogleberry Playhouse 14–17 Manchester Street, Brighton 01273 687171 www.joogleberry.com Juggler Bar 21 Western Road, Hove 01273 724195 Komedia Gardner Street, Brighton 01273 647100 www.komedia.co.uk Koo Klub 10 Pool Valley, Brighton 01273 888000 www.kooklub.co.uk Lo Lounge 106 Kings Road, Brighton 01273 715077 Marlborough Bar & Theatre 4 Princes Street, Brighton 07782 278521 www.marlboroughtheatre.co.uk Marine Tavern 13 Broad Street, Brighton 01273 681284 www.harlequin-brighton.co.uk Mint Meeting House Lane 0871 2072 088 Mojo’s Bar & Restaurant 103 North Road, Brighton 01273 622522 New Madeira Hotel 19-23 Marine Parade, Brighton 01273 698331 New Venture Theatre Bedford Place 01273 746118 www.newventure.org.uk Ocean Rooms 1–2 Morley Street, Brighton 01273 699069 Odeon Cinema West Street, Brighton 0871 224 4007 www.odeon.co.uk Ohso Social 250a Kings Road Arches, Brighton 01273 746067 The Old Market Upper Market Street, Hove 01273 736222 www.theoldmarket.co.uk The Park Crescent Pub 39 Park Crescent Terrace, Brighton 01273 604993 Pavilion Tavern 7–8 Castle Square, Brighton 0844 999 6331 Penthouse (above the Freebutt), 1 Phoenix Place, Brighton 01273 603 974 Pintxo People 95-99 Western Road, Brighton 01273 732323 www.pintxopeople.co.uk Portland Rock Bar 153 Portland Road, Hove 01273 383840 www.portlandrockbar.co.uk Po Na Na Unit 2, 75-79 East Street, Brighton 01273 777904 www.ponana.com Pressure Point 33 Richmond Place, Brighton 01273 702333 www.pressurepoint.me.uk Preston Manor Preston Drove, Brighton 01273 292770 Prestonville Arms 64 Hamilton Road, Brighton 01273 701007 Prince Albert 48 Trafalgar Street, Brighton 01273 730499 The Providence 130 Western Road, Hove 01273 727822 PV 22 Upper North Street, Brighton 01273 325491 www.thepv.co.uk Queen’s Arms 7 George Street, Brighton 01273 696873 R-Bar 7 Marine Parade, Brighton 01273 608133 www.revenge.co.uk Red Roaster Café 1d St James’s Street, Brighton 01273 686668 Rehab Brighton Marina 01273 675007 www.rehabbrighton.com Rendezvous Casino Brighton Marina 01273 605602 www.rendezvouscasino.com Revenge 32 Old Steine, Brighton 01273 606064 www.revenge.co.uk Revue Bar 19 New Steine, Brighton 01273 607456 Riki Tik 18a Bond Street, Brighton 01273 683844

Comprehensive list of venues to complement our listings

Vanilla Bar 73a Western Road, Hove 01273 748182 Vavoom 31 Old Steine, Brighton 01273 603010 Volks The Colonnade, 3 Madeira Drive, Brighton 01273 682828 www.volksclub.co.uk Western Front near Churchill Square, Brighton 01273 725656 White Horse 30 Camelford Street, Brighton 01273 603726 Wild Fruit @ Creation, 78 West Street, Brighton www.wildfruit.co.uk The Zap Kings Road Arches, Brighton 01273 202407 Zoot Street Bar Queens Road, Brighton 01273 737770 The Zone 33 St James’s Street, Brighton 01273 626442

Around Sussex The Anchor Inn Anchor Lane, Barcombe 01273 400414 www.anchorinnandboating.co.uk Ashdown Forest Broadstone car park, second left from Wychcross Assembly Hall Connaught Theatre Pavilion Theatre, Union Place, Worthing 01903 206206 www.worthingtheatres.co.uk The Black Horse High Street, Findon, Worthing 01903 872301 Bluebell Railway Sheffield Park Station, East Sussex 01825 720800 Café Blue Pevensey Road, Eastbourne 07834 405675 The Capitol North Street, Horsham 01403 750220 Chichester Festival Theatre Oaklands Park 01243 781312 www.cft.org.uk Clair Hall Perrymount Road, Haywards Heath 01444 455440 Congress Theatre Carlisle Road, Eastbourne 01323 412000 www.eastbournetheatres.co.uk Devonshire Park Theatre Compton Street, Eastbourne 01323 412000 www.eastbournetheatres.co.uk

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Eastbourne Theatres Compton Street Eastbourne 01323 412000 Fountain Inn High Street, Handcross 01444 400218 www.fountainpub.co.uk The Half Brick 221 Brighton Road, Worthing 01903 234196 The Hawth Hawth Avenue, Crawley 01293 553636 www.hawth.co.uk Horsham Folk Club The Normandy Centre, Denne Road, Horsham 01306 875653 www.horshamfolkclub.co.uk Jack Horner 80 High Street, Worthing 01903 236427 Malling Community Centre Spences Lane, Lewes 01273 477931 www.mallingcommunitycentre.com Martlets Martlets Hall, Civic Way, Burgess Hill 01444 242888 Royal Hippodrome Theatre 108 Seaside Road, Eastbourne 01323 412000 www.eastbournetheatres.co.uk Royal Oak Station Street, Lewes 01273 478124 St Thomas à Beckett Church Hall Cliffe High Street, Lewes United Reformed Church Clinton Place, corner of Broad Street, Seaford Winter Garden Theatre Compton Street, Eastbourne 01323 412000 www.eastbournetheatres.co.uk Worthing Museum & Art Gallery Chapel Road, Worthing 01903 221140 Worthing Connaught Theatre Union Place, Worthing 01903 206206 Worthing Pavilion Theatre Marine Parade, Worthing 01903 206206 www.worthingtheatres.co.uk

Saqqara 158 North Street, Brighton 01273 779701 Sky Bar 54-55 Meeting House Lane, Brighton www.skybarbrighton.com Star Inn 5–9 Manchester Street, Brighton 01273 601450 Suga Qube 5 Castle Square 01273 770246 Sumo 9–12 Middle Street 01273 749465 Sussex Arts Club 7 Ship Street 01273 778020 Theatre Royal New Road 08700 606650 www.theambassadors.com/theatreroyal V2 5 Steine Street, Brighton 01273 609672

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JOBS

latest

jobs Furniture now!

Charity Furniture Now! is proud of its ‘one thousand hours a year’ volunteer While many people consider giving their free time to a good cause, far less actually get around to doing it. Even fewer give as much as Furniture Now! volunteer Nick Mitchell who last year gave an unbelievable 1006 hours. He has worked these hours in the Eastbourne Furniture Now! (based at 3a Courtlands Road), where he is part of a team providing low cost used furniture to people on low incomes. The charity relies on volunteers in order to keep running and all the hours they put in – nearly 7000 in total – are valued, especially by the people using the service.

The charity, first started in Lewes in 1994 and opened in Eastbourne in 2005, provides furniture and some electrical goods, preventing more than a hundred tons of landfill in the Eastbourne area every year. It also provides useful training for those volunteers seeking to get back into employment, but for many volunteers, like Nick, it is an opportunity to just do something good for their community.

56-year-old Nick was a psychiatric nurse for many years and so has already served his community unstintingly. What makes Nick’s

achievement truly astonishing is that he suffers from a debilitating depression which prevents him from working. He could choose to sit at home and feel sorry for himself, but instead he chooses to help others in the most practical way he can.

Proving that volunteering benefits both the giver and receiver, Nick says: “Working here does obviously get me out of the house, it also gives me a sense of purpose and it is a good feeling knowing you are helping others who really appreciate it.” Rik Child, director of Furniture Now! says: “All our volunteers are very important to us as we could not exist without them, but Nick has given a tremendous amount of time to us – the most anyone has given since the charity started 13 years ago. He is a star.”

Says Eastbourne manager, Vicky Rawlinson: “At Furniture Now! we are always looking for donations of good quality used furniture and as the only Eastbourne charity collecting furniture, our service is stretched to the limit.” Funding is always difficult for groups such as ours. Our overheads for our showroom and free collection and delivery service are very high and we only earn about half of what we need to run. The rest we have to find funding for.“ Vicky continues: “Volunteers are absolutely essential to our survival, as we could not afford to replace them with paid staff. Nick's dedication and commitment is humbling. He may well be the volunteer who gave the most hours to any charity in Eastbourne last year, which makes him one of those quiet unsung heroes that ensure charities like ours continue.”

Furniture Now! Eastbourne, 3a Courtlands Road, Eastbourne, BN22 8TR (Donations) 01323 638000 www.furniturenow.org.uk

From left, clockwise: Tim Hawkins, Jason Cunningham, Craig Lower and Nick Mitchell celebrating Nick’s 1006 hours in the Furniture Now! Warehouse

We don’t want to blow our own trumpet, but...

People are always saying nice things about Accountancy Additions. Testimonials from existing clients:

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“I have been very impressed with the service I have received from Accountancy Additions.I think I have developed a beneficial working relationship with my consultant (Joan Johnstone), due to trust and honesty I feel I can say exactly what I would be looking for in future recruitment and that the consultant would listen and be selective when putting forward CVs to discuss. The candidate that we employed has been excellent and has met all the criteria I was looking for during the process.”

“I am extremely happy with the service and commitment from Accountancy Additions with regards to helping me find my new job. I felt a real sense of commitment from the agents who dealt with me, in terms of providing me with job options that matched my specific criteria. This commitment was there even after I had been accepted for a second interview. I was very impressed with the friendly service provided

by Laura Mann.”

We specialise in the recruitment of all Trainee to Part Qualified/Finalist Accountants with an additional focus on Analysts, Payrollers, Credit Controllers and QBEs. Here at Accountancy Additions our principal objective is to help you recruit the very best people for your organisation. To do this, we offer dedicated and specialist consultants to provide you with a genuinely superior service. It is our hope that our high standards can ensure we enjoy a strong recruitment relationship for the foreseeable future.

We take the time to listen www.accountancyadditions.com

42 latest jobs

hundreds of jobs every week...

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3/15/07

11:19 AM

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JOBS & BUSINESS

Business aid

Ian Wilson of local solicitors Dean Wilson Laing gives invaluable advice to the city’s thousands of small companies and employees This week: How stage two of new ICE regulations affect employers

QUESTION: I am the Managing Director of a company employing just over 100 staff – I understand there are some new regulations coming into force shortly which will affect me.

ANSWER: Yes, the second stage of the Information and Consultation of Employees Regulations 2004 (ICE), which will extend the duty on employers to make available a formal information and consultation procedure to all businesses employing at least 100 employees, will come into force on 6th April 2007.

QUESTION: What is the purpose of the regulations?

ANSWER: The purpose of the regulations is to enable employees to submit a request to enter negotiations to establish a way of consulting either directly with the employees or their representatives about matters which may affect

employees in the company. A valid employee request must be made by at least 10 per cent of the employees (subject to a minimum of 15) unless there is a “preexisting agreement” as may be the case in unionised workplaces, providing for the employer to inform and consult with the employees or their representatives, either elected by the employees or Trade Union if appropriate.

QUESTION: How will it affect the running of the company and what will I be required to do?

ANSWER: If you receive a valid employee request for a consultation body to be established, it has to be endorsed by at least 40 per cent of your employees and if less than 40 per cent of employees made the original request, you can request a ballot.

QUESTION: What happens if we are unable to agree a negotiated agreement?

ANSWER: You will have to hold a ballot to enable your employees to elect their representatives and then provide the representatives with information on: The company’s past and current trading situation and probable development of activities; The probable development of employment within the company in particular where there is a risk of redundancies; And decisions likely to lead to major changes in the organisation of the company or in contractual relations.

QUESTION: What are the penalties for non-compliance?

ANSWER: If you do not comply with the terms of a negotiated agreement or the standard information and consultation provisions under ICE, a complaint can be presented to the Central

Ian Wilson is senior partner of six-partner Brighton solicitors Dean Wilson Laing and specialises in employment law.

He was a part-time chairman of the Employment Tribunals for nine years. He is also a board member of The Prince’s Trust (Sussex).

Arbitration Committee (CAC) who may order you to comply. If you fail to comply with the CAC it has the power to order you to pay a penalty not exceeding £75,000, which goes to the Secretary of State rather than your affected employees or their representatives.

Do you have a question on employment law for Ian? Send it to Latest Homes at our usual address, or by email to editorial@thelatest.co.uk

DWL

SOUND ADVICE Dean Wilson Laing • Employment law • Personal injury • Family lawyers • Will & probate • Buying & selling your home

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Sue Ines si@dwl.uk.com 96 Church Street•Brighton•BN1 1UJ t: 01273 327241 f: 01273 770913 thelawyers@dwl.uk.com•www.dwl.uk.com

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latest jobs 43

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3/15/07

12:33 PM

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JOBS

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Brighton / Hove Structural Engineer, c £35k pa Web Designer, c £35k pa Outreach Workers, c £24k pa Shoreham-by-Sea Logistics Coordinator, £17–19k pa Lancing Warehouse Manager, £20k pa Worthing Overseas and Customer Service Executive, c £18k pa Commercial and Purchasing Assistant (6 month contract), £25k pa pro rata Customer Service / Outbound Sales Advisors (Warm Leads), £15,017 OTE £24k pa

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Newhaven Customer Service Administrator (German), c £18k pa Export Sales Assistant (German), c £15k pa Direct Sales Manager, £26k pa Burgess Hill Mechanical Inspector (nightshift), c £25k pa Haywards Heath Streaming Media Manager, £18–20k pa

Littlehampton Outreach Workers, c £24k pa

44 latest jobs

hundreds of jobs every week...

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Ozone Financial Recruitment

Wired Sussex

Ozone Financial Recruitment (OFR) is an independent consultancy with a commitment to professional, open and ethical recruitment, servicing clients and candidates in Brighton and surrounding areas.

OFR handles permanent, contract and interim jobs for accountants and professional accounting staff, we operate in all areas of commerce and industry, public practice and financial services.The independent nature of our business allows OFR flexibility to mould our processes to fit your needs, and we pride ourselves on working hard to understand the needs and aspirations of both clients and candidates. This personal partnership ensures a lasting and fulfilling employment solution for both.

Wired Sussex is the business development agency for over 1,200 digital media companies across Sussex and the South East. Whether you are a freelancer, start-up or established small to medium-sized enterprise, Wired Sussex offers a range of critical business services and solutions that will help you and your company grow. These include events and training, membership benefits and the latest industry news

We appreciate the responsibility involved in achieving a successful match and are extremely proud of the efficient, professional and honest service delivered by our committed and stable team of staff who all have a minimum of 5 years recruitment experience. Our success is due to our enhanced service rather than an aggressive and invasive sales approach. We choose to handle vacancies as consultants, not as a high street agency. Our aim is to exceed your expectations at all times.

If you would like to discuss a recruitment need or are looking for your next career move, call to speak to a consultant today or email your details and we will call you.

Email info@ofr.cc or tel: 01273 68 90 90

If you are looking for a job in the digital media industry why not check out www.wiredsussex.com? We are not a recruitment agency but our members post their vacancies on our website, which means that you can deal directly with them and there are no agents to take a percentage of your salary!

All the jobs on our website are based within Sussex so there’s no need to worry about commuting as there are vacancies at great companies on your doorstep. Over 50 jobs are posted on the site each month from a wide range of companies across the county.

So, for the best jobs in an attractive, fast growing industry have a look at: www.wiredsussex.com No agents, no middlemen just great jobs.

Lynn Cannell “Lynn Cannell Associates far exceed any other recruitment agent I’ve used before. I would highly recommend them to anyone!”

David Maslen M.N.A.E.A (Director) Maslen Estate Agents

Full Time Administration Assistant Required Established letting agent require a full time administration assistant to work within our busy Hove office.

The successful candidate must be very customer service orientated and have good administration skills. A competitive salary is offered and previous experience in the property industry is preferred.

To apply please send your CV to: Graham Shipp MNAEA 109 Church Road, Hove, East Sussex, BN3 2AF graham@propertymoves.co.uk 01273 321333

LCA are dedicated to assisting in the long-term growth and success of your business. Fundamentally, employing the right staff can put you a step ahead of your competitors and within this competitive property market it’s of paramount importance to employ the right people!

Combined LCA have over 35 years experience within the property sector, therefore giving you a very accurate service saving you endless amounts of time which you can ill afford. In turn, this will provide you with a great long term financial investment.

Experienced property consultants will most often register with a specialist property agent first, so don’t miss the opportunity, your competitors won’t!

Property Recruitment Specialists Register your vacancies today!

Directory Accountancy Additions Bostel House, 2nd Floor, 37 West Street, Brighton, BN1 2RE 01273 819117 brighton@accountancyadditions.com

Lynn Cannell Associates Brighton Business Centre, 95 Ditchling Road, Brighton, BN1 4ST 0845 130 1188 enquiries@lca-jobs.com

Expand 5th Floor, Tower Point, 44 North Road, Brighton, BN1 1YR 01273 668700 info@expandrecruitment.com

Ozone Financial Recruitment Unit 25, Level 6, New England House, New England Street, Brighton, BN1 4GH 01273 689090 info@ofr.cc Wired Sussex www.wiredsussex.com

To get your recruitment event or business CV listed email editorial@thelatest.co.uk

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JOBS

Roberta Pullen Recruitment Ltd

Accountancy and Tax Specialist Qualified ACA/ACCA, Hove

£35,000

Due to a recent merger our client seeks a recently qualified ACA or ACCA to take over a small portfolio of clients from one of the partners. Must be able to take responsibility, work well in a team and communicate with clients professionally and effectively. Excellent long term prospects.

Ref: 067

Corporate Tax Manager

£40,000+

For succession planning reasons our client seeks a Corporate Tax Manager, preferably from a top 20 CAs, must be technically excellent in all aspects of taxation but particularly corporate tax, share options, mergers, and tax planning. VAT experience also useful.

Ref: 059

Semi-Senior, Burgess Hill

£16,000

A part qualified ACCA with the practical experience and ability to work without constant supervision is required by this friendly CAs in Burgess Hill. A full study package is available to complete the qualification.

Ref: 064

Financial Controller, Brighton

to £35,000

Experienced Financial Controller for rapidly expanding creative retail and wholesale company. Responsibility for all financial matters and reporting direct to Managing Director. Exceptional opportunity with possible progression to director level in the future.

Ref: 068

Let’s talk: Tel: 01903 239409 / 01903 238509 Email: info@robertapullen.co.uk

http://www.robertapullen.co.uk

“ latest

jobswork!“

Our job adverts in Latest 7 get a good response and the employers are always pleased with the calibre of applicants. Latest 7 makes us look great!

Luke Hay, Wired Sussex

Part-time Receptionist We are looking for an experienced receptionist to work on a part-time basis at our busy Hove office.

Lynn Cannell Associates specialise in the recruitment of property staff, therefore Latest 7 can offer coverage to the audience and market we require. Each week Latest 7 exceed expectations through their service and quality of the magazine, constantly re-inventing and implementing new areas of interest for their readers.

Tracey Cannell, Lynn Cannell Associates

The role will entail all reception duties as well as meeting and greeting clients. The hours will be Monday to Friday from 1pm – 5pm.

We advertise regularly in Latest 7 and get a good response to our vacancies. It also provides a really good platform to raise our company profile in the local area. Most of the enquiries we receive from new customers are as a direct result of the ads we place there. The other major benefit we've found is the price, which is considerably lower than any other local publication.

Russell, Ozone Recruitment

Ideally you will have previous experience of working in a busy environment within a similar industry and be able to deal with a high volume of calls on a busy switchboard.

Tingley’s has consistently found Latest 7 magazine has the best response and coverage of any citywide publication as far as finding buyers for properties and excellent staff are concerned.

Johnathon Macfarlane, Branch Manager, Tingleys

We offer a competitive salary, central Hove offices with excellent career development and progression.

Please send your CV and covering letter to Tania Woodward, Arscotts Solicitors, 54 Lansdowne Place, Hove, BN3 1FG or email to tania.woodward@arscotts.com

46 latest jobs

I advertised for a new assistant in Latest 7 and was so pleased with the response I received. Not only did I receive over 30 enquiries but they were all of a really high calibre. Latest Homes and Latest 7 recruit all their staff through the magazine and we have a great team here!

Sharon Caple, Finance Manager

To find out how effective and inexpensive it is to advertise your vacancies here, call our sales team now on

01273 818150 hundreds of jobs every week...

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3/15/07

1:18 PM

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JOBS

SALES AND LETTINGS URGENTLY REQUIRE AN

EXPERIENCED FULL-TIME SALES NEGOTIATOR FOR FIVEWAYS OFFICE As an established successful independent family run company we are seeking to employ the type of person who appreciates the benefits of being part of a team rather than just a number!

As part of a group of five offices, the successful applicant will be based at the Fiveways office covering the Preston Park, Patcham, Hollingdean, Hollingbury and Fiveways area.

Experience in this field is essential for this position as are self-motivation, enthusiasm and professionalism. Smart appearance and clean driving licence are also a requirement.

In return we offer excellent working conditions in newly refurbished offices and the opportunity to pursue a worthwhile career with good remuneration.

If you feel this is just the position you could be looking for and fit the above criteria please send your CV in the first instance to: Dania Chaston, Manager Halls Estate Agents 253b Ditchling Road, Brighton BN1 6JD Tel: 01273 236006

Top Media Jobs ASP.NET developers – Cubeworks Do you want to join a web agency that aspires to be the best? We can offer you the opportunity to work with the very latest technologies on exciting and varied projects for interesting clients.

Business Development Manager – Academy Internet Working with the sales director of learning services, the business development manager will generate e-learning revenues through consultative sales and building a pipeline of prospects.

Web Producer – Worth Worth are urgently seeking an experienced producer (project manager) to be responsible for the management of digital projects and to become a key member of their growing team.

Web Developer – Worth Worth URGENTLY require a talented web developer to join their growing team.

Candidates should have a good fundamental knowledge of web technologies: HTML, HTTP, Javascript, XML and web and database server administration issues.

Junior A/C Exec / Office Admin – Blue Design & Marketing Ltd Supporting the client services team, your organisational skills are top notch. From sourcing quotes and managing filing systems, to ordering ink cartridges, you relish the opportunity to get involved in all aspects of the business.

Account Manager – Blue Design & Marketing Ltd Minimum three years agency experience. Responsible for managing a portfolio of accounts, from briefing through to delivery. Accountable for budgets, timelines, creative and brand management as well as profitability.

Junior Designer – Blue Design & Marketing Ltd Graphic design graduate, looking for either your first role or you may have some commercial experience under your belt. You'll have ideas of your own but will be ready to get stuck in and be taken under the wing of our creative director.

Business Development Consultant – Nido Marketing

Web Developer/Programmer Electric Sky, an international television distribution company based in Brighton, is looking to recruit an in-house Web Developer/Programmer.

The Role: The position is ideally suited to an experienced individual with excellent communication skills who is seeking challenging employment in a growing and progressive environment. Reporting to the Commercial Director you would be required to design, maintain, develop and build new websites for the company.

The Candidate: The successful candidate would need expertise in database driven websites, in ASP and SQL and an excellent working knowledge of Flash and Flash Video.

Please forward your CV with a covering letter and salary expectations to: Karen Young, Electric Sky, 1 Clifton Mews, Clifton Hill, Brighton, BN1 3HR. or email karen.young@electricsky.com

Depending on the campaigns you work on you could be talking with a senior decision maker in a multinational corporation in the morning and a local small business owner in the afternoon, so the ability to think on your feet and adapt quickly to different situations is essential.

F/T Web & Multimedia Developer - AVT Limited We are looking to recruit a full time multimedia programmer to become a key member in our growing production team. The role will provide a fantastic opportunity to get involved in a wide variety of challenging and interesting projects.

ASP, ASP.Net/VB.Net Programmer – Virtusales.com Limited Due to expansion we are looking to add another full time permanent ASP, ASP.Net/VB.Net programmer to our team. Your role will include adding new functionality to our Biblio range of systems and undertaking systems integration activities.

Senior online media sales exec – Mousetrap Media Ltd The publisher of Journalism.co.uk, an expanding Brighton-based news and recruitment web site covering the burgeoning online publishing industry, seeks a senior online media sales executive.

Flash Designer (Games/Anim) – Littleloud Littleloud are looking for a specialist designer with core skills in delivering high-end entertainment content using Flash. The post will require animation skills, character design, game design and interface development.

News NotOnlyButAlso takes a drive with Top Gear NotOnlyButAlso has helped the BBC create the next generation Top Gear website which has become a destination in its own right, where all things Top Gear are watched as well as read.

...to advertise call our sales team on 01273 818150

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3/16/07

9:35 AM

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latestTV

Dani on TV

She says it how she sees it

Shark Five, 22 March This is a new law programme from over the pond, and I have to admit the prospect of another American Law and Order-style show taking over our TVs was not something I was excited about. We have Ally McBeal (which, I should just own up now, I love), then there’s that other one with William Shatner, which is looking more and more like Ally each week. I’m sure there are other ones, but they are all so similar they have merged into one and I can’t remember any of their names. But once I starting watching Shark, I felt that this one might just be a little different, as it just so happens to star James Woods who, we all know, is excellent at playing sarcastic cops/lawyers.

James plays a lawyer nicknamed ‘The Shark’, mainly because of his bad-ass law skills and the fact that he hardly ever loses a case. And that’s how it starts: The Shark wins a case, and a wife-beater who managed to ‘accidentally’ kill his wife walks free with his adoring girlfriend hanging off his arm. A little later The Shark gets a call and is told the wife-beater he helped free has killed his girlfriend.

So after feeling pretty crap and haunted by the girl’s death, The Shark takes some time off, until asked to help in a murder trial.

A man was murdered by his girlfriend; the girlfriend says that it was self-defence and that her boyfriend tried to rape her. Everyone who knew the boyfriend think that is totally out the question as he wouldn’t, apparently, hurt a fly. While this is happening The Shark’s ex-wife tells him she is remarrying and moving to New York, taking The Shark’s 16year-old daughter with her.

What a jam-packed first episode this is!

The good thing with this, which I can’t remember seeing in much else, is that the relationship between The Shark and his ex-wife is a good one.

They are friends which is nice, and it means this show doesn’t follow all the patterns that others do. His relationship with his daughter is more normal than all the other father-daughter relationships we see on our screens. There is also something else different about it, in a good way, but I can’t quite put my finger on what it is. Maybe it’s because James Woods is in it; maybe it’s because he plays a lawyer who really wants to be one, so much so he built a courtroom in his basement; perhaps it’s because the cases are really gritty. Whatever it is, it works. Like I always say, if you like this sort of thing, this could be the show for you.

Films on TV This week’s must-see movies

TUESDAY 20

Election ★★★★★ (1999, ITV2, 10pm. Dir Alexander Payne) Sharp black comedy starring Reese Witherspoon and Matthew Broderick as an overachieving student and her underhand and initially idealistic teacher. An ongoing battle of chirpy vs progressive psycho, it’s fun to see our main man keep on losing it.

Victoria Nangle Ray didn’t fancy his chances against Giant Haystacks: Sexy Beast, Weds, Film 4 11pm

Cellular ★★★★✩ (2004, Sky Movies 2, 12am.

Dir David R Ellis) Gimmicky but tense thriller, very close in plot to 2004’s Phone Booth (the same writer was involved in both), in which Chris Evans (not that one) chases across LA following the voice of a woman on his mobile who claims to have been kidnapped. An implausable story that still manges to be gripping viewing.

MC

SATURDAY 24 Chocolat ★★★★✩

WEDNESDAY 21 Sexy Beast ★★★★★ (2000, Film4, 11pm. Dir Jonathan Glazier ) Career con Ray Winstone has retired from his criminal ways to the sunny climes of Spain with lovely wife Amanda Redman in tow – but his criminal past hasn’t finished with him yet. Hold tight for an utterly nasty but completely compelling character study, featuring a brilliant cast, that’s not to be missed.

VN

THURSDAY 22

(2000, BBC2, 9.25pm.

Dir Lasse Hallström) Juliette Binoche is luminous as the sexy chocolatier who puts the va va voom back into a stuffy French town, angering the prudish mayor in the process. A superior chick flick – but be warned, Johnny Depp (as the Gypsy love interest) doesn’t turn up until halfway through.

MC

The Witches of Eastwick

★★★✩✩ (1987, ITV1, 10.40pm. Dir George Miller) Jack Nicholson stars as the Devil himself, summoned by three lonely women in search of lurve, in this black comedy which was hot stuff in the 80s but looks slightly ragged round the edges now. Prepare yourself for the sight of Cher, pretty much in her pre-plastic-surgery days.

MC

SUNDAY 25

The Business ★★★★✩

Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back ★★★✩✩

(2005, Channel4, 10.30pm. Dir Nick Love) Danny Dyer returns as a young geezer taking a break from the ‘opportunities’ of Sahf London to deliver a dying man’s package to a gent on the Costa Del Sol, little knowing that this will be his accidental ‘in’ to the heady world of British gangsters and organsied crime.

VN

(2001, BBC2, 11.15pm. Dir Kevin Smith) The gruesome stoner twosome head to Hollywood for a comedy that’s high on Tinseltown in-jokes and general grossout, but low on actual laffs. Still, it’s almost worth watching for the occasional star cameo, including Carrie Fisher as a nun.

MC

FRIDAY 23

MONDAY 26

Confessions of a Dangerous Mind ★★★✩✩

Traffic ★★★★✩

(2002, BBC2, 11.40pm. Dir George Clooney) George Clooney’s often overlooked vanity project is a wilfully peculiar adaptation of popular American gameshow host Chuck Barris’s memoirs – in which he claims to have worked undercover for the CIA. Ambitious and surreal, it’s not what you’d expect from the ex-ER star.

Matt Chittock

48 latest 7

20 – 26 Mar

(2000, Five, 11pm Dir Steven Soderbergh) A brave movie from a groundbreaking director, Traffic aims to reveal the truth about the drugs trade through the viewpoints of a Mexican cop, a conservative American politician and assorted dealers. Like its powdery white subject – once you start it’s impossible to give up.

MC

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tuesday 20 Focus ITV1, 7.30pm Property prices are going up and we’re feeling the pinch in the south east, so it’s no surprise the lengths some people go to to get on the property ladder, including buying a home with a stranger. It’s one thing to rent with a nutter, but to tie up your financial future with a potential doo-lally psycho?

Dangerous ground.

CSI: Crime Scene Investigation Five, 9pm It’s an old tale come back to haunt the CSIs - one of legends and tough guys from the Vegas of yore. Guest starring Roger Daltry!

Yes, the fella that sings the theme tune turns up doing the most bizarre accent to reap our revenge on the Yanks for Dick Van Dyke’s cockerney.

American Idol ITV2, 6.30pm Bless – there are only six girls and six boys left and now they’ve been banded together into one group. No more sexual segregation here. Plus, Diana Ross sings live in the studio and Cat Deeley and Ryan Seacrest support the kids as Simon and co knock them down. It’s a nice way to spend a Tuesday evening.

terrestrial

sport

BBC1

BBC2

ITV1

Channel 4

Five

Sky Sports 1

6.00am Breakfast 9.15 Don’t Get Done, Get Dom 10.00 Escape To The Country 11.00 To Buy Or Not To Buy 11.30 Car Booty 12.15pm Cash In The Attic 1.00 BBC News; Weather 1.30 Regional News And Weather 1.40 Neighbours 2.05 Doctors 2.35 Diagnosis Murder 3.20 BBC News; Weather; Regional News 3.25 Maya And Miguel 3.45 The Likeaballs 4.00 Whizz Whizz Bang Bang 4.30 The Slammer 5.00 Blue Peter 5.25 Newsround 5.35 Neighbours

6.00am–9.25 CBeebies 9.45 Mama Mirabelle’s Home Movies 10.00 In The Night Garden 10.30 Primary History 10.50 Primary Geography: Portrait Of Europe 11.10 Star Trek: The Next Generation 12.00pm The Daily Politics 12.30 Working Lunch 1.00 Coming To England 1.20 Primary Geography 1.30 Lifeline 1.45 Animal Park 2.15 Escape To The Country 3.15 Sudo-Q 3.45 Flog It! 4.30 Ready Steady Cook 5.15 The Weakest Link

6.00am GMTV 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 10.30 This Morning 12.30pm Loose Women 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News; Weather 2.00 Midsomer Murders 3.00 Daily Cooks 4.00 Poirot 5.00 Soapstar Superchef

6.00am The Cubeez 6.10 The Hoobs (x2) 7.00 Freshly Squeezed 7.30 Friends 8.00 Just Shoot Me (x2) 9.00 Frasier 9.30 Freshly Squeezed 10.00 That’ll Teach ‘Em 11.00 How To Dump Your Mates 11.30 Don’t Make Me Angry 12.00pm News At Noon 12.30 FILM: Avalanche Express (1979) 2.00 Room For Improvement 2.30 My Place In The Sun 3.30 Countdown 4.15 Deal Or No Deal 5.00 Richard And Judy

6.00am Tickle, Patch And Friends 6.25 Old Bear Stories 6.35 Bird Bath 6.45 Hi-5 7.20 The Beeps 7.30 Little Princess 7.45 Make Way For Noddy 8.00 Fifi And The Flowertots 8.15 Peppa Pig 8.20 Thomas & Friends 8.35 Funky Valley 8.40 Titch 8.50 Mio Mao 9.00 The Wright Stuff 10.30 Trisha Goddard 11.30 Five News 12.00pm Home And Away 12.30 BrainTeaser 1.40 FILM: Moms On Strike (2002) 3.40 FILM: Taming Andrew (2000) 5.30 Five News

6.00am Soccer AM: The Best Bits 7.00 WWE Afterburn 8.00 Cricket: World Cup (x2) 10.00 Soccer AM: The Best Bits 11.00 Cricket: World Cup (x2) 1.00pm LIVE Cricket World Cup (x2) 10.00 You’re On Sky Sports 11.00 Revista De La Liga 12.00am Speedway: Elite League 2.00 Revista De La Liga 3.00 You’re On Sky Sports

6.00 BBC News And Weather 6.30 South East Today; Weather 7.00 Women On Fire Two-part doc with single mother Aimi and receptionist Sarah trying to realise their ambitions of becoming firefighters in just 16 days.

7.30 EastEnders Honey plucks up the courage to tell Billy her big news.

Who thought it was a good idea to give this one-time child beater more kids, anyway? Remember Jamie?

8.00 Holby City Faye and Jac lock horns over Joseph.

9.00 Life On Mars When a man’s wife and daughter are kidnapped and held hostage, Sam is determined to shake the demons from his head and focus on the investigation. But when a worse-for-wear Sam isn’t at hand, Annie is left exposed as she deduces the identity of the kidnapper.

10.00 BBC News; Regional News; Weather 10.35 ONE Life Documentary which follows several couples as they fight for custody of their pets after the relationship has broken down.

11.15 Cricket World Cup Highlights 12.15am FILM: Cat People (1982) 2.15 Sign Zone: See Hear 2.45 Seaside Rescue 3.45 An Island Parish 4.15 Dr Alice Roberts: Don’t Die Young 4.45 Joins BBC News 24 5.00 Cricket World Cup Highlights

6.00 Eggheads Some ‘cracking’ quiz questions. See what we did there?

6.30 A Taste Of My Life Dishy actor Max Beesley rustles up a delectable dish from a recipe he received from Mariah Carey. ‘Cos she obviously lives in the kitchen. Not. 7.00 Sleep Clinic Zzzzzzz – hic! – zzzzzz – mmmphh – zzzz. Mmm. Eh? 7.30 Are We There Yet? How Britain’s buses are in disarray particularly how ‘bus wars’ brought mayhem to Manchester. Help us ObiWan Kenobi, you’re our only hope.

8.00 The Underdog Show Eight famous faces find themselves paired up with eight untrained and previously unloved rescue dogs.

9.00 Horizon The Earth is facing the biggest mass extinction since the dinosaurs were wiped out. 99 per cent of all species that ever existed have disappeared. However the rates of extinction are now 10,000 times the natural rate. Gulp.

9.50 A Wild Irish Summer 10.00 The Underdog Show Results There are no losers, but one not-winner is leaving tonight.

10.30 Newsnight 11.20 Iraq Week: This World: Iraq: A Doctor’s Story International investigative documentary series.

Shot by an Iraqi doctor.

12.00am Storyville: The Team 1.25 Malcolm In The Middle 2.00 Vocational Bitesize (x2)

6.00 Meridian Tonight 6.30 ITV Evening News; Weather 7.00 Emmerdale Carrie wants to sever her ties to the Kings. But then she’d lose her contract with ITV. What a dilemma.

7.30 Focus See highlights.

8.00 Cops With Cameras Highoctane series in which miniature cameras fitted to police uniforms take you to the heart of the action. Cheap telly for your entertainment.

9.00 Half Ton Hospital: Tonight Special Brookhaven Hospital in New York is unique, it tries to save the lives of the world’s fattest people. Its method is simple but controversial, a strict regime of diet and exercise.

10.00 Marbella Belles They’re bold, bronzed and bleached to their roots.

Meet five British women who’ve turned their backs on the UK for the Costa del Sol. Orange is their favourite colour.

10.30 ITV News; Weather 11.00 Real Crime: The Almost Perfect Murder The story of Albert Walker, now serving a life sentence for the muder of Ronald Platt - whose identity he assumed, and who managed to fool close friends and associates for almost a decade.

12.00am ITV Play: Glitterball 3.40 Guitar Heroes Forever 4.35 The Jules And Lulu Show 5.00 ITV Nightscreen 5.30 ITV Early Morning News

6.00 The Simpsons 6.30 Hollyoaks Russ tells Carmel that he wants to marry Mercedes.

7.00 Channel 4 News 7.55 3 Minute Wonder: City Of Cranes - Solitary 8.00 Selling Houses Abroad Stuart and Penny Tonge want to escape from their Spanish cave house which is on the verge of collapsing. Creak.

9.00 Ulrika... Am I A Sex Addict?

Ulrika Jonsson presents a revealing and personal doc exploring sex addiction, a condition alleged to affect over four million in the UK. 10.00 Kidnapped Drama series in which the son of a millionaire is kidnapped and everyone is a suspect.

Even you. Yes you. No, to your right.

11.40 I Speak Animal Britain’s first pet psychic. Gotta love TV. 12.10am PartyPoker.com Poker Nations Cup 1.10 World Cup Skiing 3.00 KOTV 3.25 Velux 5 Oceans 3.55 3 Minute Wonder 4.00 Chez Mimi 4.15 When The Romans Came To Wales 4.30 All Change 4.50 The Number Crew 5.00 Animated World Faiths 5.15 Just Write 5.30 Puzzle Maths 5.45 More Adventures From The Writing House

6.00 Home And Away Drew struggles to cope with Amanda and Peter’s relationship. Keep it in the family or what?!

6.30 Everybody Hates Chris Sitcom based on the early life of Chris Rock.

7.00 Five News 7.15 The Singing Estate Pressure mounts for conductor Ivor Setterfield’s novice choir as they prepare to take the stage at the Royal Albert Hall and face a crowd of 5,000. Bless. And yikes!

8.00 Pirate Of The Caribbean: The True Story Doc bringing the latest historical evidence and underwater forensic techniques to bear on Henry Morgan, one of history’s most notorious rogues, and uncovering his key role in Britain’s battle with Spain for the riches of the Americas.

9.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation See highlights.

10.00 CSI: Miami In the first of a two-part crossover episode with CSI:NY, the team works in tandem with New York’s Detective Mac Taylor to apprehend a convicted serial killer.

11.00 Law And Order: Special Victims Unit A rape victim’s attacker appears to be back, but this time the woman’s crusade to catch him works.

12.00am The FBI Files 1.00 NBA Action 4.05 Motorsport Mundial 4.30 Race And Rally UK

Sky Sports 2 6.00am Aerobics Oz Style 6.30 High Altitude 7.00 Aerobics Oz Style 7.30 High Altitude 8.00 Speedway: Elite League 10.00 World Motor Sport 12.30pm Speedway: Elite League 2.30 Soccer AM: The Best Bits 3.30 World Motor Sport 6.00 High Altitude 6.30 Revista De La Liga 7.30 LIVE Speedway: Elite League 9.30 Spirit Of Yachting: Rolex Trofeo SM La Reina 10.00 Poker: William Hill Grand Prix 12.00am Sports Unlimited 1.00 Fishing: Carpfest 2006

Sky Sports 3 8.30am FEI Equestrian World 9.00 Fishing: Bass Fishing 10.00 Fishing: Carpfest 2006 11.00 Racing News 11.30 Aerobics Oz Style 12.00pm Fishing: Bass Fishing 1.00 Max Power 2.00 High Altitude 2.30 FEI Equestrian World 3.00 Fishing: Carpfest 2006 4.00 Fishing: Bass Fishing 5.00 WWE Smackdown 7.00 Spirit Of Yachting: Rolex Trofeo SM La Reina 7.30 LIVE Greyhounds 10.00 Fishing: Carpfest 2006 11.00 World Pool Trickshots 1.00am Triathlon

Victoria Nangle

extraterrestrial Sky One

BBC3

BBC4

ITV2

ITV3

E4

More4

Living TV

9.00am Backyard Killers 10.00 Stargate SG-1 (x2) 12.00pm The 4400 1.00 Angel 2.00 Tru Calling 3.00 Jake 2.0 4.00 Stargate SG-1 (x2) 6.00 Stargate Atlantis 7.00 The Simpsons (x4) 9.00 Battlestar Galactica 10.00 Road Wars 11.00 Cold Case 12.00am Unsolved Crimes USA 1.00 Uncut! Best Unseen Ads (x2)

7.00pm Honey We’re Killing The Kids Revisited 7.30 Help! My Dog’s As Fat As Me 8.00 Castaway: The Last 24 Hours 8.30 The Real Hustle 9.00 The Real Dirty Dancing 10.00 EastEnders 10.30 Ideal 11.00 Family Guy (x2) 11.45 Castaway: The Last 24 Hours 12.15am The Real Dirty Dancing 1.10 Ideal

7.20pm Rover: The Long Goodbye 8.00 The World 8.30 Never Mind The Full Stops 9.00 The Day Today 9.30 The League Of Gentlemen 10.00 Life On Mars 11.00 The Lost World Of Red Robbo 11.30 Rover: The Long Goodbye 12.10am Never Mind The Full Stops 12.40 Are We Having Fun Yet?

12.30pm Coronation Street 1.00 Emmerdale 1.30 The Jeremy Kyle Show 2.35 The Ricki Lake Show 3.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 4.25 Sally Jessy Raphael 5.15 Judge Judy 6.30 American Idol (x2) 9.00 WAGs Boutique 10.00 FILM: Election (1999) 12.00am FILM: Daylight (1996) 2.10 ITV Play

1.35pm Lovejoy 2.40 Is It Legal? 3.10 Home To Roost 3.40 Movies Now 3.50 Cagney And Lacey 4.50 Quantum Leap 5.50 Due South 6.50 Lovejoy 8.00 Rising Damp (x2) 9.00 Northern Lights 10.05 Inspector Wexford: Murder Being Once Done 12.15am Lovejoy 1.20 Robin Of Sherwood 2.20 Raffles

2.00pm Switched 2.30 One Tree Hill 3.30 Smallville: Superman The Early Years 4.30 Hollyoaks 5.00 Friends (x2) 6.00 Scrubs (x2) 7.00 Hollyoaks 7.30 The War At Home 8.00 Friends (x2) 9.00 The OC 10.00 Skins 11.00 Celebrity Sex Tapes Unwound 12.05am Scrubs (x2) 1.00 Smallville: Superman The Early Years

1.05pm Deal Or No Deal 2.00 ER 3.00 Hill Street Blues 4.00 FILM: Jassy (1947) 5.55 3 Minute Wonder (x2) 6.05 Deal Or No Deal 7.00 Grand Designs 8.00 More4 News 8.30 The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 9.00 Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares 10.05 FILM: The Big Chill (1983) 12.00am NYPD Blue

1.00pm Will & Grace (x2) 2.00 Mad About You (x2) 3.00 Missing 4.00 Charmed (x2) 6.00 America’s Next Top Model 7.00 The X Files 8.00 The Real Extras 9.00 New Most Haunted 10.00 Outrageous Fortune 11.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 12.00am The X Files 1.00 New Most Haunted 2.00 Threat Matrix

UK TV Gold

Paramount

Discovery

Sci Fi

Sky Movies 1 Sky Movies 2 Film4

TCM

3.00pm My Family 3.40 Porridge 4.20 Dinnerladies 5.00 The Bill (x2) 7.00 Dinnerladies 7.40 Porridge 8.20 My Family 9.00 Only Fools And Horses 9.40 Open All Hours 10.20 Blackadder Goes Forth 11.00 Only Fools And Horses 11.40 Open All Hours 12.20am Blackadder Goes Forth 1.00 Gimme Gimme Gimme 1.40 Blessed

2.00pm Frasier (x2) 3.00 Two And A Half Men (x2) 4.00 King Of Queens (x2) 5.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (x2) 6.00 Less Than Perfect (x2) 7.00 Scrubs (x2) 8.00 That 70s Show (x2) 9.00 Scrubs (x2) 10.00 Sex And The City 10.35 South Park (x2) 11.35 The World Stands Up (x2) 12.35am Sex And The City

6.00pm American Chopper 7.00 Mythbusters 8.00 How Do They Do It? 8.30 How It’s Made 9.00 Deadliest Catch 10.00 World’s Lost Tribes 11.00 Crimes That Shook The World 12.00am Mythbusters 1.00 Guilty Or Innocent? 2.00 Forensic Detectives 3.00 World’s Lost Tribes 3.50 Everest: Beyond The Limit

11.00am V 1.00pm Star Trek 2.00 The Lost World 3.00 FILM: Storm (1999) 4.50 Psychic Detectives 5.20 FILM: Lightning: Bolts Of Destruction (2003) 7.10 V 9.00 FILM: Jaws 2 (1978) 11.20 Medium 12.20am Erotic Misadventures Of The Invisible Man 2.10 FILM: Inferno (2001) 4.00 Star Trek 5.00 The Lost World

1.30pm MVP2: Most Vertical Primate (2001) 3.00 The Patron Saint Of Liars (1997) 4.40 The Best Man In Grass Creek (2001) 6.10 Sky Captain And The World Of Tomorrow (2004) 8.00 Two For The Money (2005) 10.05 King Arthur (2004) 12.15am Fat Slags (2004) 1.35 A Home At The End Of The World (2004)

6.45am Three Daring Daughters (1948) 8.45 Pride Of The Marines (1945) 11.00 Little Women (1949) 1.10pm The Glass Slipper (1955) 3.00 The Bridge On The River Kwai (1957) 6.10 The Brothers Karamazov (1958) 9.00 Twelfth Night (1996) 11.30 Beau Brummell (1954) 1.30am Eye Of The Devil (1967)

12.45pm Family Blessings (1996) 2.20 Going For Broke (2003) 4.00 MVP - Most Valuable Primate (2000) 5.45 UK Top 10 6.00 The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy (2005) 8.00 Cursed (2005) 9.40 Flight Of The Phoenix (2004) 11.35 Casino (1995) 2.35am Smilla’s Feeling For Snow (1997)

3.00pm The Black Swan (1942) 4.35 The Bravados (1958) 6.25 The Bridges Of Madison County (1995) 9.00 Infernal Affairs (2002) 10.55 Lock, Stock And Two Smoking Barrels (1998) 1.00am The Return (2003) 3.15 Close

050_LS313_TV_Wed

3/14/07

3:40 PM

Page 1

wednesday 21 Dragon’s Den BBC2, 8pm Ooh yay! Not only do we have new pitches to cock our heads sideways at the television at, but there are also catch-ups with previous contestants. Will it include recent hit Reggae Sauce, now to be found on the shelves of Sainsbury’s, the egg boiler that wouldn’t work or any of your other favourites? What a treat.

Grand Designs Channel 4, 9pm You know that point when you have an epiphany and utter the words: “I have a dream”? That’s what must’ve happened to Katrin and James when they decided to convert a disused solarium into a luxury penthouse flat. They didn’t think about the 60 elderly neghbours below them. Bet they weren’t in the dream.

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart More4, 8.30pm This is great. Gathering together various news stories from around America, and sometimes from around the globe, the subversive satirist Jon Stewart makes light and pokes holes in today’s America. Broadcast here the day after the US, this is up-to-date and cutting edge.

terrestrial

sport

BBC1

BBC2

ITV1

Channel 4

Five

Sky Sports 1

6.00am Breakfast 9.15 Don’t Get Done, Get Dom 10.00 Escape To The Country 11.00 To Buy Or Not To Buy 11.30 Car Booty 12.15pm Cash In The Attic 1.00 BBC News; Weather 1.30 Regional News And Weather 1.40 Neighbours 2.05 Doctors 2.35 Diagnosis Murder 3.20 BBC News; Weather; Regional News 3.25 Maya And Miguel 3.45 The Likeaballs 4.00 Whizz Whizz Bang Bang 4.30 The Slammer 5.00 Blue Peter 5.25 Newsround 5.35 Neighbours

6.00am–9.25 CBeebies 9.45 Mama Mirabelle’s Home Movies 10.00 In The Night Garden 10.30 Star Trek: The Next Generation 11.15 The Flying Gardener 11.30 Budget Special 2.30pm World Skating Highlights 3.15 Sudo-Q 3.45 Flog It! 4.30 Ready Steady Cook 5.15 The Weakest Link

6.00am GMTV 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 10.30 This Morning 12.30pm Loose Women 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News; Weather 2.00 Midsomer Murders 3.00 Daily Cooks 4.00 Poirot 5.00 Soapstar Superchef

6.00am The Cubeez 6.10 The Hoobs (x2) 7.00 Freshly Squeezed 7.30 Friends 8.00 Just Shoot Me (x2) 8.55 Frasier 9.30 My Crazy Life 10.00 That’ll Teach ‘Em 11.00 How To Dump Your Mates 11.30 Don’t Make Me Angry 12.00pm News At Noon 12.30 Seaside Secrets 12.45 FILM: The Undefeated (1969) 2.55 Room For Improvement 3.30 Countdown 4.15 Deal Or No Deal 5.00 Richard And Judy

6.00am Tickle, Patch And Friends 6.25 Old Bear Stories 6.35 Bird Bath 6.45 Hi-5 7.20 The Beeps 7.30 Little Princess 7.45 Make Way For Noddy 8.00 Fifi And The Flowertots 8.15 Peppa Pig 8.20 Thomas & Friends 8.35 Funky Valley 8.40 Titch 8.50 Mio Mao 9.00 The Wright Stuff 10.30 Trisha Goddard 11.30 Five News 12.00pm Home And Away 12.30 BrainTeaser 1.30 FILM: A Nightmare Come True (1997) 3.30 FILM: Columbo: Columbo Cries Wolf (1990) 5.30 Five News

6.00am You’re On Sky Sports 7.00 WWE Heat 8.00 Cricket World Cup (x2) 10.00 Revista De La Liga 11.00 Cricket World Cup (x2) 1.00pm LIVE Cricket World Cup (x2) 11.00 Boots N All 12.00am Conference Football 1.30 Poker: William Hill Grand Prix 3.30 You’re On Sky Sports

6.00 BBC News And Weather 6.30 South East Today; Weather 7.00 Women On Fire Second in the two-parter following the progress of two ladies training to be firefighters.

7.30 My Family Michael’s latest scam eventually puts everyone at risk. He’s a little scamp.

8.00 Watchdog 8.30 Seaside Rescue A land and sea search is sparked when a family row leads to a man taking to the sea in a kayak in the middle of the night.

Sounds like a Five afternoon movie.

9.00 New Street Law Charlie and Annie defend a young boxer accused of rape, but the judge knows the victim and is determined to secure a conviction. Tricky.

10.00 BBC News; Regional News; Weather 10.35 Budget Statement By The Chancellor 10.40 The National Lottery Draws 10.45 FILM: Scary Movie 3 (2003) Starring Charlie Sheen, Anna Faris, Pamela Anderson, Marny Eng, Jenny McCarthy and Simon Rex. Sequel in the series of spoof horror films.

12.00am Cricket World Cup Highlights 1.05 Sign Zone: Jimmy’s Diaries 1.35 The Madness Of Modern Families 2.05 A Very English Village 2.55 Gene Detectives 3.40 Gene Detectives 4.25 Joins BBC News 24 5.00 Cricket World Cup Highlights

6.00 Eggheads Clever quiz.

6.30 A Taste Of My Life Dirty Den’s missus Tracy-Ann Oberman is taken down memory lane by an old college friend, as she is challenged to rustle up a ‘tuna surprise’. No tuna?

7.00 Top Gear This week they build their own stretch limos out of the most improbable cars and then use them to take some top celebrities to the Brit Awards. Only these boys.

8.00 Dragons’ Den Among the ideas pitched is a power-saving plug socket. Also, there is a catch-up with some of the most memorable pitches from the series. See highlights.

9.00 Party Animals As the Sedley by-election hots up, so does the relationship between Ashika and Scott. However, when Scott receives a CD containing photos of Ashika and James Northcote he is torn.

9.50 Don’t Watch That Watch This! Satirical pastiche.

10.00 Have I Got Old News For You Comedy quiz.

10.30 Newsnight 11.20 Budget Statement By The Chancellor 11.25 Iraq Week: The Trial Of Saddam Hussein Documentary following the Iraqi prosecution and Saddam Hussein’s defence team.

12.15am Taken 1.40 Joins BBC News 24 2.00 BBC Learning Zone: Schools: Vocational Bitesize (x2)

6.00 The Simpsons 6.30 Hollyoaks The hen and stag nights prove traumatic for Tony, Jacqui and Mercedes. With this crowd it couldn’t be any other way.

7.00 Channel 4 News 7.55 3 Minute Wonder: City Of Cranes 8.00 Relocation, Relocation Phil revisits Tom and Fiona Butcher, who uprooted from London and bought two properties in Scotland - one in Glasgow’s west end, the other in the countryside. La di da.

9.00 Grand Designs See highlights.

10.00 Desperate Housewives Bree thinks she’s found evidence that proves Alma killed Monique. Mike’s lawyer wants him to plead guilty to manslaughter. Gabrielle and Vern’s contestant wins the Little Miss Snowflake pageant. Yay! Good news at last.

11.05 Gordon Ramsay’s F Word This first episode in the second series sees Gordon and his family collect the pigs they are to rear and features Kathy Burke as the restaurant guest.

12.05am My Name Is Earl 12.35 The War At Home (x2) 1.30 The Osbournes (x2) 2.30 Bob And Margaret 2.55 The Jamie Kennedy Experiment 3.45 Abductees 4.00 Wild Things 4.45 The Mummy Road Show 5.15 Countdown

6.00 Home And Away Peter lies for Drew to save him from a criminal record. Amanda helps Drew realise that he can’t hold a grudge against his father forever. Not if he wants to keep getting bailed out – the advantages to being a copper’s son.

6.30 Everybody Hates Chris Comedian Chris Rock narrates this sitcom based on his early life.

7.00 Five News 7.15 Lemur Island When you go to Lemur Island you magically transform into a lemur for the duration of your stay. There are only lemurs. No other thing must exist. Until you leave. We hope you enjoyed your holiday.

Actually, it’s a wildlife show. Sorry.

8.00 Child In A Million In this programme, young brothers Sandip and Jaydip undergo cornea transplants in a bid to gain some sight.

9.00 FILM: Solo (1996) Starring Mario Van Peebles, William Sadler, Adrien Brody. Sci-fi adventure about a US military droid which, having been created as the ultimate killing machine, develops a sense of the value of human life. Robocop on the cheap.

10.55 Disorderly Conduct 11.55 PartyPoker.com European Open III 1.25am NHL Ice Hockey 3.50 Boxing Classic 4.30 NHRA Drag Racing

6.00 Meridian Tonight 6.30 ITV Evening News; Weather 7.00 Emmerdale A row between Jack and Billy sends Daz over the edge. Oh no! He’s a boy on the brink!

7.30 Coronation Street Peter and Maria are getting close - but what will Tracy say? Quite a lot.

8.00 The Bill: Sweet Revenge Sam, Diane and Will deal with an assault on a woman who is running a seedy web chat service from her home. Should be the safest way to contribute to the sex industry.

9.00 FILM: Along Came Polly (2004) Starring Ben Stiller, Jennifer Aniston, Philip Hoffman, Debra Messing, Hank Azaria, Alec Baldwin.

Romantic comedy. An uptight insurance salesman with an aversion to risk is thrown into turmoil on honeymoon when he discovers his wife has already been unfaithful. So he makes friends with a girl who wants to have fun. Fun is had, along with adventure and mayhem.

10.30 ITV News; Weather 11.00 FILM: Along Came Polly More ‘zany’ happenings.

11.20 Harry Hill’s TV Burp Harry Hill distils all the week’s must-see TV. 11.50 Steven Seagal’s Orange Playlist 12.15am ITV Play: Glitterball 4.05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 5.00 ITV Nightscreen 5.30 ITV Early Morning News

Sky Sports 2 6.00am Aerobics Oz Style 6.30 High Altitude 7.00 Aerobics Oz Style 7.30 High Altitude 8.00 Sports Unlimited 9.00 High Altitude 9.30 Spirit Of Yachting: Rolex Trofeo SM La Reina 10.00 Poker: William Hill Grand Prix 12.00pm Speedway: Elite League 2.00 Poker: William Hill Grand Prix 4.00 Speedway: Elite League 6.00 European Tour Weekly 6.30 Boots N All 7.30 LIVE Conference Football 10.00 You’re On Sky Sports 11.00 European Tour Weekly 11.30 Total Rugby 12.00am Max Power 1.00 Fishing: Carpfest 2006 2.00 Boots N All

Sky Sports 3 10.00am Fishing: Carpfest 2006 11.00 Racing News 11.30 Aerobics Oz Style 12.00pm Sports Unlimited 1.00 Fishing: Thinking Tackle 2.00 High Altitude 2.30 Spirit Of Yachting: Rolex Trofeo SM La Reina 3.00 Fishing: Carpfest 2006 4.00 Sports Unlimited 5.00 WWE The Bottom Line 6.00 WWE Afterburn 7.00 Watersports World 8.00 European Tour Weekly 8.30 Total Rugby 9.00 Boots N All 10.00 Watersports World 11.00 Trans World Sport 12.00am Pool: World Cup Of Pool (x2)

Victoria Nangle

extraterrestrial Sky One

BBC3

BBC4

ITV2

ITV3

E4

More4

Living TV

9.00am Unsolved Crimes USA 10.00 Stargate SG-1 (x2) 12.00pm The 4400 1.00 Angel 2.00 Tru Calling 3.00 Jake 2.0 4.00 Stargate SG-1 (x2) 6.00 Stargate Atlantis 7.00 The Simpsons (x2) 8.00 Futurama (x2) 9.00 The Dresden Files 10.00 Lost 11.00 Cold Case 12.00am Unsolved Crimes USA 1.00 Road Wars

7.00pm Anthea Turner: The Perfect Housewife 8.00 Castaway: The Last 24 Hours 8.30 Conning The Conmen 9.00 Freaky Eaters: Addicted To Chicken 10.00 Ideal 10.30 Spacehopper 11.00 Castaway: The Last 24 Hours 11.30 Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps (x2) 12.30am Freaky Eaters: Addicted To Chicken

7.00pm Planet Earth 8.00 The World. It’s still there.

No one has stolen the World. So don’t worry. 8.30 All Mod Cons 9.00 Racism: A History 10.00 Hotel 10.30 Tight Spot: Stuck 11.00 Hotel 11.30 Underground: Arena 12.30am Racism: A History 1.30 Proms On Four 2006 3.20 Racism: A History

1.00pm Emmerdale 1.30 The Jeremy Kyle Show 2.35 The Ricki Lake Show 3.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 4.30 Sally Jessy Raphael 5.15 Airline USA 5.45 Judge Judy 7.00 Smallville 8.00 New Homes From Hell 9.00 FILM: Daylight (1996) 11.10 Coronation Street 11.40 FILM: Species III (2004) 1.50am Comedy Cuts

11.15am Cagney And Lacey 12.15pm Robin Of Sherwood 1.25 Lovejoy 2.30 Is It Legal? 3.05 Home To Roost 3.35 Film File 3.40 Cagney And Lacey 4.45 Quantum Leap 5.45 Due South 6.45 Lovejoy 7.55 Bramwell 9.00 The Jasper Carrott Show 9.30 FILM: Romeo And Juliet (1968) 12.10am Lovejoy

2.00pm Switched 2.30 One Tree Hill 3.30 Smallville: Superman The Early Years 4.30 Hollyoaks 5.00 Friends (x2) 6.00 Scrubs (x2) 7.00 Hollyoaks 7.30 The War At Home 8.00 Friends (x2) 9.00 Ugly Betty 10.00 Miss Match 11.00 Desperate Housewives 12.00am Scrubs (x2) 12.55 Smallville: Superman The Early Years

5.45 3 Minute Wonder: (x4) 6.05 Deal Or No Deal 7.00 Grand Designs 8.00 More4 News 8.30 The Daily Show With Jon Stewart. See highlights. 9.00 Britain’s Worst Weather 10.00 Grand Designs: Trade Secrets 10.35 Time Team Special: Pugin - The God Of Gothic 11.40 NYPD Blue 12.30am The Daily Show

3.00pm Missing 4.00 Charmed (x2) 6.00 America’s Next Top Model 7.00 The X Files 8.00 America’s Next Top Model 9.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 10.00 Criminal Minds 11.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 12.00am The X Files 1.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 2.00 Threat Matrix 2.55 Cutting It

UK TV Gold

Paramount

Discovery

Sci Fi

Sky Movies 1 Sky Movies 2 Film4

TCM

3.00pm My Family 3.40 Porridge 4.20 Dinnerladies 5.00 The Bill (x2) 7.00 Dinnerladies 7.40 Porridge 8.20 My Family 9.00 Only Fools And Horses 9.40 Open All Hours 10.20 One Foot In The Grave 11.00 Only Fools And Horses 11.40 Open All Hours 12.20am One Foot In The Grave 1.00 Gimme Gimme Gimme 1.40 Blessed

3.00pm Two And A Half Men (x2) 4.00 King Of Queens (x2) 5.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (x2) 6.00 Less Than Perfect (x2) 7.00 Scrubs (x2) 8.00 That 70s Show (x2) 9.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (x2) 10.00 Sex And The City 10.35 South Park (x2) 11.35 The World Stands Up (x2) 12.35am Sex And The City

3.00pm Forensic Detectives 4.00 The Garage 5.00 How It’s Made 5.30 Ultimate Guinness World Records 6.00 American Chopper 7.00 Mythbusters 8.00 How Do They Do It? 8.30 How It’s Made 9.00 How Do They Do It? (x2) 10.00 Big Machines 11.00 World’s Deadliest Season 12.00am Mythbusters

1.00pm Star Trek 2.00 The Lost World 3.00 FILM: Thirst (1998) 4.45 FILM: Jaws 2 (1978) 7.10 V 9.00 Heroes 10.00 FILM: Entrapment (1999) 12.15am FILM: Emmanuelle 2000: Intimate Encounters (2000) 2.10 FILM: Lightning: Bolts Of Destruction (2003) 4.00 Star Trek 5.00 The Lost World

11.20am Rebound (2005) 1.00pm Indie On Sky Movies 1.20 Taken Away (1996) 2.55 A Child’s Cry For Help (1994) 4.30 A Bear Named Winnie (2004) 6.20 Rebound (2005) 8.00 Breakfast On Pluto (2007) 10.15 Running Scared (2005) 12.20am Ladder 49 (2004) 2.20 Johnson Family Vacation (2004)

6.45am Young Cassidy (1965) 8.35 David Copperfield (1935) 11.00 Twelfth Night (1996) 1.30pm Lili (1953) 3.00 Murder Most Foul (1964) 4.45 The Last Time I Saw Paris (1954) 7.00 Kismet (1955) 9.00 Maybe Baby (2000) 10.55 Brotherly Love (1969) 1.05am The Password Is Courage (1962)

2.20pm Her Own Rules (1998) 4.00 Max Rules: Adventures Of A Superspy (2005) 5.45 Sky Movies News 6.15 Sky High (2005) 8.00 American Pie Presents Band Camp (2005) 9.45 Catch A Fire- Sky Movies Special 10.00 The Dukes Of Hazzard (2005) 11.50 Sideways (2004) 2.00am Before And After (1995)

3.00pm Marjorie Morningstar (1958) 5.25 Laura (1944) 7.05 Evolution (2001) 9.00 The Thomas Crown Affair (1968) 11.00 Sexy Beast (2000) Ben Kingsley is a fantastic nutter terrifying Ray Winstone in this one last heist caper. Smashing.

12.40am Miami Blues (1990)

051_LS313_TV_Thu

3/14/07

3:39 PM

Page 1

thursday 22 Hotel Babylon BBC1, 9pm Oh, it’s all ‘lovely and sexy, darling’ in this posh den of decadence as kiss and tell kitten Jennifer Ellison checks in for a photo shoot, raising the temperature of lovely barman Gino. However, this also proves the catalyst for a number of revelations about the dastardly but sexy Luke. Juicy.

The Yellow House Channel 4, 9pm Bucketloads of eccentricities and brilliance in this drama, as the nine weeks Van Gogh and Gauguin lived together in the Yellow House come under scrutiny. They clash and struggle, culminating in Van Gogh making his most famous cut ever. His ear.

Starring John Simm, this promises to be excellent.

Quantum Leap ITV3, 4.55pm Oh boy! Yes, it’s another chance to see Scott Bakula jump into a different time to set things on their right course, with his friend Al from the future and Al’s computer Ziggy as the only help he can get. Of course it does help that it’s always 20th century America he jumps into, and all is usually sorted within a few days.

terrestrial

sport

BBC1

BBC2

ITV1

Channel 4

Five

Sky Sports 1

6.00am Breakfast 9.15 Don’t Get Done, Get Dom 10.00 Escape To The Country 11.00 To Buy Or Not To Buy 11.30 Car Booty 12.15pm Cash In The Attic 1.00 BBC News; Weather 1.30 Regional News And Weather 1.40 Neighbours 2.05 Doctors 2.35 Diagnosis Murder 3.20 BBC News; Weather; Regional News 3.25 Maya And Miguel 3.45 The Likeaballs 4.00 Whizz Whizz Bang Bang 4.30 The Slammer 5.00 Blue Peter 5.25 Newsround 5.35 Neighbours

6.00am–9.25 CBeebies 9.45 Mama Mirabelle’s Home Movies 10.00 In The Night Garden 10.30 Look And Read 10.50 Primary Geography: Using The Land 11.00 Primary Geography: Using The Land 11.10 English Express 11.40 Snapshots 12.00pm The Daily Politics 12.30 Working Lunch 1.00 Family Xchange 1.45 Animal Park 2.15 World Skating Highlights 3.15 Sudo-Q 3.45 Flog It! 4.30 Ready Steady Cook 5.15 The Weakest Link

6.00am GMTV 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 10.30 This Morning 12.30pm Loose Women 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News; Weather 2.00 Midsomer Murders 3.00 Daily Cooks 4.00 Poirot 5.00 Soapstar Superchef

6.00am Grabbit The Rabbit 6.10 The Hoobs (x2) 7.00 Freshly Squeezed 7.30 Friends 8.00 Just Shoot Me (x2) 8.55 Frasier 9.30 My Crazy Life 10.00 That’ll Teach ‘Em 11.00 How To Dump Your Mates 11.30 Don’t Make Me Angry 12.00pm News At Noon 12.30 FILM: Captain Scarlett (1953) 1.55 Room For Improvement 2.25 A Place In The Sun 3.30 Countdown 4.15 Deal Or No Deal 5.00 Richard And Judy

6.00am Tickle, Patch And Friends 6.25 Old Bear Stories 6.35 Bird Bath 6.45 Hi-5 7.20 The Beeps 7.30 Little Princess 7.45 Make Way For Noddy 8.00 Fifi And The Flowertots 8.15 Peppa Pig 8.20 Thomas & Friends 8.40 Titch 8.50 Mio Mao 9.00 The Wright Stuff 10.30 Trisha Goddard 11.30 Five News 12.00pm Home And Away 12.30 BrainTeaser 1.35 FILM: The Jayhawkers! (1959) 3.35 Five News Update 3.40 FILM: Target Unknown (1951) 5.30 Five News

6.00am You’re On Sky Sports 7.00 WWE Experience 8.00 Cricket World Cup (x2) 10.00 Boots N All 11.00 Cricket World Cup (x2) 1.00pm LIVE Cricket World Cup (x2) 10.00 FIFA Futbol Mundial 10.30 Guinness Rugby Club 12.00am FIFA Futbol Mundial 12.30 Darts: Premier League

6.00 BBC News And Weather 6.30 South East Today; Weather 7.00 Nurses On The Run: The Real Story Investigation into why hundreds of British nurses are heading to Australia and how the exodus could cripple the Health Service in years to come.

7.30 EastEnders Stacey makes a discovery which leaves her doubting Max. What? That he’s married?

8.00 Waterloo Road Jack and Kim are humiliated when a work experience placement goes badly wrong. Davina finally lets Jack know how she feels about him. Bless.

9.00 Hotel Babylon See highlights.

10.00 BBC News; Regional News; Weather 10.35 Budget Response By The Conservative Party The shadow chancellor responds to the Budget.

Not in a ‘making a face’ way though.

10.40 Question Time To mark the fourth anniversary of the Iraq war, David Dimbleby chairs a special debate from London.

11.40 This Week 12.25am Cricket World Cup Highlights 1.30 Sign Zone: Panorama 2.00 Blair: The Inside Story 3.00 When Love Comes To Town 3.30 Sleep Clinic 4.00 Gene Detectives 4.45 Joins BBC News 24 5.00 Cricket World Cup 2007

6.00 Eggheads Quizzy quizzy quiz time.

6.30 A Taste Of My Life Alan Bennett reveals that his fear of eating out in public stems from his mum’s insistence on smuggling in their own bread and butter.

7.00 My Life As A Child Series made by children aged between seven and 11.

7.30 Rick Stein’s Food Heroes: Another Helping A gastronomic tour of Britain as Rick Stein and Chalky continue their culinary quest.

8.00 Hairy Bikers Ride Again The Hairy Bikers roar back into action with a madcap tour of south India, starting in Madras.

8.30 It’s Not Easy Being Green 9.00 Fear, Stress And Anger As Martin and Julie get smashed and have a Friday night bop at home, Gran quietly drinks herself into a coma and ends up in hospital.

9.30 Dead Ringers Sketch show.

10.00 The Graham Norton Show The world according to Graham.

10.30 Newsnight 11.20 Budget Response By The Conservative Party 11.25 Desi DNA Asian arts and lifestyle magazine.

11.55 MPs On The Box 12.25am Taken 1.50 The Witness 2.00 BBC Learning Zone: Schools: Vocational Bitesize (x2)

6.00 Meridian Tonight 6.30 ITV Evening News; Weather 6.55 Budget Response By The Conservative Party By the Shadow Chancellor. No shadow puppets involved.

7.00 Emmerdale Turner tells Louise that he wants nothing more to do with the pageant. This is one determined and gruff man.

7.30 Cathedral Cities Hannah ScottJoynt visits the South’s cathedral cities to find out what makes them each unique.

8.00 The Bill Smithy’s day gets off to a bad start when he finds the body of Ryan Jones’s wife in the boot of her husband’s car. That’s nothing compared to how her day went!

9.00 Taggart Burke feels like he is stepping back in time when the body of a woman clothed in bin bags is found by the Clyde, a copycat killing replicating a 20-year-old murder case.

They’ve run out of stories so they’ve got a copycat. Most ingenious.

10.30 ITV News; Weather 11.00 Meridian Soccer Night News and action from all the region’s local teams, plus the latest goals and interviews with the players and managers making the headlines.

11.30 The Last Word 12.00am ITV Play: Make Your Play 4.10 Make Me Perfect 5.00 ITV Nightscreen 5.30 ITV Early Morning News

6.00 The Simpsons 6.30 Hollyoaks Mercedes wakes up next to Warren. This is getting to be a habit. What about that nice Russ fella you’ve been hanging around with, Mercy?

7.00 Channel 4 News 7.55 3 Minute Wonder: City Of Cranes 8.00 Chaos At The Chateau Fly-onthe-wall series following Essex couple Ann and David Darrell as they leave the UK to set up a new life running a luxury hotel in Slovakia.

After months of work coverting an old castle into their exclusive hotel, Ann and David face a race against time to prepare for their first booking – a wedding party.

9.00 The Yellow House See highlights.

10.30 FILM: The Business (2005) Starring Danny Dyer, Tamer Hassan.

Violent Brit gangster movie set in Spain’s Costa del Crime in the 80s.

The rise and fall of a criminal empire is viewed through the eyes of an apprentice gangster.

12.15am 4Music Presents: Good Charlotte 12.50 4Music: O2 Wireless Festival 1.50 FILM: Checking Out (1989) 3.25 Animal Farm 4.25 Dispatches: When Did You Last Beat Your Wife?

5.20 3 Minute Wonder 5.25 Countdown

6.00 Home And Away Kim and Rachel’s dream of becoming parents comes true when they are granted custody of baby Joe. Happy times!

6.30 Everybody Hates Chris 7.00 Five News 7.15 How Not To Decorate Colin and Justin take a stone-clad seventies throwback semi, redecorate it in a French Provencale style and fall out with the builders.

8.00 Ann Maurice: Interior Rivalry 2 House Doctor Ann Maurice oversees a contest to choose a top new interior-design talent.

9.00 House House is back at work after recovering from multiple gunshot wounds – you knew someone would do it – and takes on two cases simultaneously: Richard, a man paralysed since brain cancer surgery eight years ago and Caren, a young woman paralysed after a yoga session. Busy, busy, busy.

10.00 Shark US drama about a charismatic former defence attorney who switches sides by joining the prosecutor’s office.

11.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation A killer returns with deadly results. The entire team is engaged in a race against time to stop this sadistic killer.

12.00am Football Night 1.00 Quiz Call 4.00 Football Argentina 4.50 Dutch Football

Sky Sports 2 6.00am Aerobics Oz Style 6.30 High Altitude 7.00 Aerobics Oz Style 7.30 High Altitude 8.00 Conference Football 9.30 Total Rugby 10.00 European Tour Weekly 10.30 Trans World Sport 11.30 Total Rugby 12.00pm European Tour Weekly 12.30 Conference Football 2.00 Trans World Sport 3.00 Conference Football 4.30 Boots N All 5.30 Jack’s Perfect Golfer 6.00 LIVE Golf Night: Live 10.00 Jack’s Perfect Golfer 10.30 ATP Tennis 11.00 Sailing 11.30 Jack’s Perfect Golfer 12.00am Golf Night 4.00 Jack’s Perfect Golfer

Sky Sports 3 7.00am Irish Greyhound Racing 7.30 Total Rugby 8.00 Watersports World 9.00 Pool: World Cup Of Pool (x2) 11.00 Racing News 11.30 Aerobics Oz Style 12.00pm Watersports World 1.00 Boots N All 2.00 High Altitude 2.30 Irish Greyhound Racing 3.00 Pool: World Cup Of Pool (x2) 5.00 WWE Heat 6.00 Guinness Rugby Club 7.30 LIVE Darts: Premier League 11.00 High Altitude 11.30 NBA Action 12.00am Race World 1.00 Sailing 1.30 Trans World Sport

Victoria Nangle

extraterrestrial Sky One

BBC3

BBC4

ITV2

ITV3

E4

More4

Living TV

12.00pm The 4400 1.00 Angel 2.00 Tru Calling 3.00 Jake 2.0 4.00 Stargate SG1 (x2) 6.00 Stargate Atlantis 7.00 The Simpsons (x4) 9.00 Bones 10.00 Cold Case 11.00 Cold Case 12.00am Unsolved Crimes USA 1.00 Sport Uncovered 1.50 Uncut! The Villa 2.40 Stargate Atlantis 3.30 The 4400 4.20 Tru Calling

7.00pm Anthea Turner: The Perfect Housewife 8.00 Castaway: The Last 24 Hours 8.30 Rush Hour 9.00 Freaky Eaters: Addicted To Junk Food 10.00 EastEnders 10.30 The Real Hustle 11.00 Conning The Conmen 11.30 Castaway: The Last 24 Hours 12.00am Freaky Eaters: Addicted To Junk Food

7.00pm Sounds Of The Sixties 7.10 The Avengers.

Steed and Mrs Peel save the world. Again. 8.00 The World 8.30 The Waiting Room 9.00 Crossing The Line 10.30 Abduction: Storyville 11.50 Tight Spot: Stuck 12.20am The Waiting Room 12.50 Crossing The Line 2.20 Proms On Four 2006

1.30pm The Jeremy Kyle Show 2.35 The Ricki Lake Show 3.20 The Jeremy Kyle Show 4.25 Sally Jessy Raphael 5.15 Airline USA 5.45 Judge Judy 7.00 Smallville 8.00 WAGs Boutique 9.00 FILM: Passenger 57 (1993) 10.40 Supernatural 11.40 Comedy Cuts 12.10am FILM: Out Of Sight (1998)

12.25pm Robin Of Sherwood 1.35 Lovejoy 2.40 Never The Twain 3.10 Home To Roost 3.40 Movies Now 3.50 Cagney And Lacey 4.55 Quantum Leap. See highlights. 5.55 Due South 6.55 Lovejoy 8.00 Pie In The Sky 9.00 Hack 10.00 The Woman In White 11.25 Lovejoy 12.30am Heartbeat

2.00pm Switched 2.30 One Tree Hill 3.30 Smallville: Superman The Early Years 4.30 Hollyoaks 5.00 Friends (x2) 6.00 Scrubs (x2) 7.00 Hollyoaks 7.30 The War At Home 8.00 Friends (x2) 9.00 ER 10.00 Skins 11.00 FILM: Boys On The Side (1995) 1.10am Scrubs (x2) 2.05 Smallville: Superman The Early Years

4.00pm FILM: The Silent Enemy (1958) 6.00 Snowmail 6.05 Deal Or No Deal 7.00 Grand Designs 8.00 More4 News 8.30 The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 9.00 Grand Designs 10.00 Grand Designs: Trade Secrets 10.35 Without A Trace 11.35 NYPD Blue 12.25am The Daily Show

1.00pm Will & Grace (x2) 2.00 Mad About You (x2) 3.00 Missing 4.00 Charmed (x2) 6.00 America’s Next Top Model 7.00 The X Files 8.00 Get A Life 9.00 CSI: Miami 10.00 Boston Legal 11.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 12.00am The X Files 1.00 Boston Legal 2.00 Threat Matrix 2.55 Cutting It

UK TV Gold

Paramount

Discovery

Sci Fi

Sky Movies 1 Sky Movies 2 Film4

TCM

2.20pm The Good Life 3.00 My Family 3.40 Porridge 4.20 Dinnerladies 5.00 The Bill (x2) 7.00 Dinnerladies 7.40 Porridge 8.20 My Family 9.00 Only Fools And Horses 9.40 Open All Hours 10.20 I’m Alan Partridge 11.00 Only Fools And Horses 11.40 Open All Hours 12.20am I’m Alan Partridge

4.00pm King Of Queens (x2) 5.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (x2) 6.00 Less Than Perfect (x2) 7.00 Scrubs (x2) 8.00 That 70s Show (x2) 9.00 Everybody Hates Chris (x2) 10.00 Sex And The City 10.35 South Park 11.05 South Park 11.35 The World Stands Up (x2) 12.35am Sex And The City 1.10 South Park

4.00pm The Garage 5.00 How It’s Made 5.30 Ultimate Guinness World Records 6.00 American Chopper 7.00 Mythbusters 8.00 How Do They Do It? 8.30 How It’s Made 9.00 My Shocking Story 10.00 World’s Lost Tribes 11.00 Extreme Medical Stories 12.00am Mythbusters 1.00 Scene Of The Crime

3.00pm FILM: Tornado Warning (2002) 4.50 Psychic Detectives 5.20 FILM: Knight Rider 2000 (1991) 7.10 V 9.00 A Town Called Eureka 10.00 FILM: Silent Warnings (2003) 11.35 FILM: Emmanuelle 2000: Emmanuelle’s Sensual Pleasures (2000) 1.25am FILM: Entrapment (1999)

1.30pm Unstrung Heroes (1995) 3.10 A Pyromaniac’s Love Story (1995) 4.50 Balto (1995) 6.15 Like Mike 2: Streetball (2006) 8.00 Philadelphia (1993) 10.10 Lord Of War (2005) 12.15am Just Friends (2005) 1.55 Never Die Alone (2004) 3.30 Hard Eight (1997) 5.15 First Of May (2000)

12.55pm The Biggest Bundle Of Them All (1968) 3.00 Doctor Zhivago (1965) 6.30 Behind The Scenes: Doctor Zhivago 6.55 Kim (1950) 9.00 The Wild Geese (1978) 11.30 Escape From Fort Bravo (1953) 1.15am The Fearless Vampire Killers (1967) 3.00 Teleshopping 5.00 The Barretts Of Wimpole Street (1956)

9.30am Frozen Impact (2002) 11.15 Bewitched (2005) 1.00pm Merlin And The Sword (1985) 2.45 Frozen Impact (2002) 4.30 Air Bud: Spikes Back (2003) 6.15 Bewitched (2005) 8.00 King Kong (2005) 11.05 Cry Wolf (2005) 1.00am Primal Fear (1996) 3.10 Broken Flowers (2005) 5.10 Air Bud: Spikes Back (2003)

3.00pm The Guinea Pig (1948) 4.50 The Wicked Lady (1983) 6.50 The Pink Panther (1963) Original Clouseau comedy with genius Peter Sellers trying to find the elusive Pink Panther diamond. 9.00 LA Confidential (1997) 11.35 Narc (2001) 1.00am South Central LA (1992)

052_LS313_TVFri

3/15/07

12:29 PM

Page 1

friday 23 Let’s Talk Sex Channel 4, 8pm Despite having the highest rate of teenage pregnancy and STIs in the whole of Western Europe, schools are still left on their own when it comes to teaching children about sex. Tonight Davina argues for a radical overhaul of the current system and visits Holland, where they do things very differently.

Simon Schama: Rough Crossings BBC2, 9pm TV historian Simon Schama presents a drama-documentary that charts the extraordinary journey of American slaves who fought for the British in the American War of Independence, and were then led to Africa where they established their own autonomous colony.

Jonathan Ross’s Japanorama BBC3, 11.40pm The trash culture vulture steps outside the Japanese mainstream to explore Gajin – the outsiders of Japenese society. Tonight he meets the Bosozuku biker gangs, explores the world of illegal road racing and has a sneak preview of Samuel L Jackon’s new animated series adapted from the Manga, Afro Samurai.

terrestrial

sport

BBC1

BBC2

ITV1

Channel 4

Five

Sky Sports 1

6.00am Breakfast 9.15 Don’t Get Done, Get Dom 10.00 Escape To The Country 11.00 To Buy Or Not To Buy 11.30 My Life For Sale 12.15pm Cash In The Attic 1.00 BBC News; Weather 1.30 Regional News And Weather 1.40 Neighbours 2.05 Doctors 2.35 Diagnosis Murder 3.20 BBC News; Weather; Regional News 3.25 Maya And Miguel 3.45 The Likeaballs 4.00 Whizz Whizz Bang Bang 4.30 Underdogs 5.00 Gina’s Laughing Gear 5.30 Newsround 5.35 Neighbours

6.00am Fimbles 6.25 The Story Makers 6.35 Balamory 7.00 Astro Boy 7.25 Newsround 7.30 The Story Of Tracy Beaker 7.45 Underdogs 8.15 ChuckleVision 8.30 Tommy Zoom 8.40 Numberjacks 9.00 Nina And The Neurons 9.15 Lunar Jim 9.25 Me Too! 9.45 Home Movies 10.00 In The Night Garden 10.30 Nile Shorts: The Gift Of The Nile 10.45 Nile Shorts 11.00 Starship 11.20 Chat Room 12.00pm Daily Politics 12.30 Working Lunch 1.30 Animal Park 2.15 World Skating 3.15 Sudo-Q 3.45 Flog It! 4.30 Ready Steady Cook 5.15 The Weakest Link 6.00 Eggheads General knowledge quiz with Judith Keppel.

6.30 A Taste Of My Life Star of Coronation Street, Waterloo Road and Cutting It, Angela Griffin reveals her humble origins and her rise to fame by the age of 16.

7.00 Elle: Super Business Model 7.30 Open Gardens Peta and Paul at The Birches are a design-loving couple who need advice on planting for their shady area.

8.00 Christine’s Garden Spring has sprung and everything in Christine Walkden’s garden is bursting at the seams with new growth.

8.30 Gardeners’ World Monty sows seeds for plants to fill baskets at Berryfields to green the neighbourhood.

9.00 Simon Schama: Rough Crossings See highlights.

10.35 Newsnight 11.05 Newsnight Review Roundtable arts discussion of the week’s big releases.

11.35 Budget Response By The Liberal Democrats The shadow chancellor for the Liberal Democrat responds to the Budget.

11.40 FILM: Confessions Of A Dangerous Mind (2002) Oddball black comedy based on the cult memoirs of Chuck Barris directed by George Clooney.

1.25am Taken 2.50 Star Trek The Enterprise (x2)

6.00am GMTV 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 10.30 This Morning 12.30pm Loose Women 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News; Weather 2.00 Midsomer Murders 3.00 Daily Cooks 4.00 Poirot 5.00 Soapstar Superchef

6.10am The Hoobs 6.35 The Hoobs 7.00 Freshly Squeezed 7.30 Friends 8.00 Just Shoot Me 8.30 Just Shoot Me 8.55 Frasier 9.30 My Crazy Life 10.00 That’ll Teach ‘Em 11.00 How To Dump Your Mates 11.30 Don’t Make Me Angry 12.00pm News At Noon 12.30 FILM: The Hunters (1958) 2.25 A Place In The Sun 3.30 Countdown 4.15 Deal Or No Deal 5.00 Richard And Judy

6.00am Tickle, Patch And Friends 6.25 Old Bear Stories 6.35 Bird Bath 6.45 Hi-5 7.20 The Beeps 7.30 Little Princess 7.45 Make Way For Noddy 8.00 Fifi And The Flowertots 8.15 Peppa Pig 8.20 Thomas & Friends 8.35 Funky Valley 8.40 Titch 8.50 Mio Mao 9.00 The Wright Stuff 10.30 Trisha Goddard 11.30 Five News 12.00pm Home And Away 12.30 BrainTeaser 1.30 FILM: Harvey (1996) 3.30 FILM: Last Casino (2004) 5.30 Five News

6.00am FIFA Futbol Mundial 6.30 Guinness Rugby Club 8.00 Cricket World Cup (x2) 10.00 ATP Tennis 10.30 FIFA Futbol Mundial 11.00 Cricket World Cup (x2) 1.00pm LIVE Cricket: World Cup (x2). Coverage of the 2007 Cricket World Cup clash between India and Sri Lanka at Queen’s Park Oval, 11.00 Premier League Preview 11.30 Gillette World Sport 12.00am Super League 1.30 Premier League Preview 2.00 Friday Fight Night 4.00 Soccer AM’s All Sports Show 5.00 Premier League Preview 5.30 FIFA Futbol Mundial

6.00 Meridian Tonight Local news magazine. Including Meridian weather.

6.30 ITV Evening News; Weather The latest national and international news.

6.55 Budget Response By The Liberal Democrats The Liberal Democrats respond.

7.00 Emmerdale Scarlett meets her brothers and Jack’s attempts to unite the family don’t go down too well with Andy.

7.30 Coronation Street Will Deirdre leave Tracy in the lurch at the trial?

Janice tries to interfere in Leanne’s new business and a pair of con artists target the Street.

8.00 Tonight With Trevor McDonald Headline-making investigations and exclusive interviews, with Trevor McDonald and the Tonight team.

8.30 A Touch Of Frost A ruthless kidnapper tests Frost’s skills to the full – it proves a tough case to crack and, for one woman, time is running out.

10.30 ITV News; Weather 11.00 WAGs Boutique More hairspray, handbags and hard work from the celeb wives.

12.00am ITV Play: Make Your Play ITV’s interactive game show.

4.10 60 Minute Makeover 5.00 ITV Nightscreen 5.30 ITV Early Morning News .

6.00 The Simpsons After reading The Bridges of Madison County, Marge suspects that the romance has gone out of her life.

6.30 Hollyoaks Tony crashes the wedding, telling Jacqui she can’t marry Aleksander.

7.00 Channel 4 News Including sport and weather.

7.30 The Insider Topical current affairs series in which politicians, journalists and public figures speak out on contemporary issues.

8.00 Let’s Talk Sex See highlights.

9.00 Ugly Betty Christine announces she’s going to clean out ‘the closet’, and the Mode assistants whip themselves into a frenzy over who gets the high fashion cast-offs.

10.00 The Charlotte Church Show Guests include Canadian rock star Avril Levigne.

10.50 Balls Of Steel This week, the Annoying Devil makes one man’s life a living hell and the Big Gay Following offers men hard cash if they’ll get friendly with him.

11.40 Transmission With T-Mobile Featuring Joss Stone, Maxïmo Park, and Mark Ronson.

12.45am 4 Music: JD Set Presents: Get Cape Wear Cape Fly 1.05 Goalissimo!

2.05 World Cup 4.00 Freesports On 4 4.25 Trans World Sport

6.00 Home And Away Jack makes a promise to protect Sam. 6.30 Everybody Hates Chris Tired of wearing ‘hand-me-up’ winter coats from Drew, Chris decides that a leather jacket will make him look cool.

7.00 Five News National and international news with John Suchet.

7.30 Mean Machines A look at tunnelling machines, from the largest ever to a two-metre microtunneller guided by lasers.

8.00 Killer Bee Attack Documentary looking at the Africanised killer bee, which has claimed the lives of over a thousand Americans since arriving in the US in the 1950s.

9.00 NCIS US ‘tec drama. Tony and Ziva disappear while searching for smuggled weapons at a shipyard.

10.00 Law And Order: Criminal Intent Tough drama. When the police accidentally shoot an innocent collector of expensive toys, Detectives Goren and Eames discover that the victim may have fallen prey to a conniving vixen who trawls sci-fi and vampire conventions looking for lonely men.

11.00 Act Your Age: Celebrities Going To Seed How celebs try to stay looking young.

12.00am Prison Break Acclaimed prison escape drama.

1.00 Quiz Call 5.35 Wildlife SOS

6.00 BBC News And Weather 6.30 South East Today; Weather Regional news magazine.

7.00 A Question Of Sport Sports quiz hosted by Sue Barker with regular captains Ally McCoist and Matt Dawson.

7.30 Inside Out Investigating the shocking free holiday con that’s seeing dozens of teenagers being locked up abroad charged with drug smuggling.

8.00 EastEnders Stacey and Tanya come to blows at Peggy’s birthday party, forcing Max to take drastic steps. Billy worries that he won’t be able to provide for his family. Phil is pushed too far by Ian. 8.30 A Class Apart One-off drama in which an outspoken single mum falls for a public school headmaster after he gives her ragamuffin son a scholarship place at his school.

10.00 BBC News; Regional News; Weather 10.35 Budget Response By The Liberal Democrats 10.40 Friday Night With Jonathan Ross 11.40 Cricket World Cup Highlights Highlights from the ICC Cricket World Cup 2007, being held in the West Indies.

12.40am FILM: In Dreams (1999) Psychological thriller.

2.20 Joins BBC News 24 5.00 Cricket World Cup 2007

Sky Sports 2 6.00am Aerobics Oz Style 6.30 High Altitude 7.00 WWE Raw 9.00 High Altitude 9.30 Guinness Rugby Club 11.00 Golf Night 3.00pm Guinness Rugby Club 4.30 FIFA Futbol Mundial 5.00 Premier League Preview 5.30 Jack’s Perfect Golfer 6.00 LIVE Golf Night: Live. Coverage of the CA Championship at the Doral Golf resort in Florida. 10.00 LIVE Friday Fight Night 12.00am Golf Night 4.00 Jack’s Perfect Golfer 4.30 Sailing 5.00 360 Surfing 5.30 Jack’s Perfect Golfer

Sky Sports 3 7.00am ATP Tennis 7.30 Darts: Premier League 11.00 Racing News 11.30 Aerobics Oz Style 12.00pm Trans World Sport 1.00 Race World 2.00 High Altitude 2.30 NBA Action 3.00 Trans World Sport 4.00 WWE Raw 6.00 Soccer AM’s All Sports Show 7.00 Premier League Preview 7.30 LIVE Super League 10.00 WWE Late Night Smackdown 12.00am WWE Late Night Bottom Line 1.00 Soccer AM’s All Sports Show 2.00 Sports Unlimited 3.00 Super League 4.30 Fishing: Bass Fishing 5.30 High Altitude

Matt Chittock

extraterrestrial Sky One

BBC3

BBC4

ITV2

ITV3

E4

More4

Living TV

1.00pm Angel 2.00 Tru Calling 3.00 Jake 2.0 4.00 Stargate SG-1 (x2) 6.00 Stargate Atlantis 7.00 The Simpsons (x3) 8.30 Crash Test Dummies 9.00 FILM: The Devil’s Advocate (1997) 11.40 Cold Case 12.40am Unsolved Crimes USA 1.35 Street Wars 2.25 Uncut!

The Villa 3.15 Footballers’ Pads 3.30 Tru Calling

7.00pm Doctor Who Confidential 7.30 Doctor Who (x2) 9.00 TV Gaffes Galore 10.00 EastEnders 10.30 Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps (x2) 11.30 Two Pints Of Lager Outtakes 11.40 Jonathan Ross’s Japanorama. See highlights. 12.10am Ideal 12.40 Family Guy (x2) 1.25 TV Gaffes Galore

7.00pm 4 Better 4 Worse: The Anatomy Of A String Quartet 8.00 The World.

Current Affairs. 8.30 The Beat Room 9.00 Long John Baldry: In The Shadow Of The Blues 9.50 Rock Family Trees 10.40 John Mayall: 40 Years Of The Blues 11.40 The Avengers 12.30am Never Mind The Full Stops

3.20pm The Jeremy Kyle Show 4.25 Sally Jessy Raphael 5.15 Airline USA 5.45 Judge Judy 7.00 Smallville 8.00 ITV At The Movies 8.30 American Idol (x2) 11.00 Coronation Street 11.30 Test Drive My Girlfriend 12.00am FILM: Out Of Sight (1998) 2.15 ITV Play: Make Your Play 4.00 Teleshopping

12.25pm Robin Of Sherwood 1.30 Lovejoy 2.35 Never The Twain 3.05 Home To Roost 3.40 Film File 3.50 Cagney And Lacey 4.50 Quantum Leap 5.50 Due South 6.50 Lovejoy 8.00 Dandelion Dead 10.10 FILM: The Right Stuff (1983) 1.45am Hornblower 3.45 Film File 3.50 Teleshopping

3.30pm Smallville: Superman The Early Years 4.30 Hollyoaks 5.00 Friends (x2) 6.00 Scrubs (x2) 7.00 Hollyoaks 7.30 The War At Home 8.00 Friends 8.30 Friends 9.00 My Name Is Earl 9.30 Peep Show 10.00 Kidnapped 11.45 Scrubs (x2) 12.40 The War At Home 1.10 Smallville: Superman The Early Years

1.05pm Deal Or No Deal 2.00 ER 3.00 Hill Street Blues 4.00 FILM: Scaramouche (1952) 6.05 Deal Or No Deal 7.00 Grand Designs Revisited 8.00 More4 News 8.30 The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 9.00 Without A Trace 10.00 The Closer 11.00 Live From Abbey Road 12.05am NYPD Blue

12.00pm Charmed 1.00 Will & Grace (x2) 2.00 Mad About You (x2) 3.00 Missing 4.00 Charmed (x2) 6.00 America’s Next Top Model 7.00 The X Files 8.00 Close To Home 9.00 Criminal Minds 10.00 CSI: Miami 11.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 12.00am The X Files 1.00 Criminal Minds

UK TV Gold

Paramount

Discovery

Sci Fi

Sky Movies 1 Sky Movies 2 Film4

TCM

7.40pm Open All Hours 8.20 My Family 9.00 Comedy Superheroes: 3rd Place 9.40 Comedy Superheroes: Runner-up 10.20 EuroMillions: Boom Bang A Bang 10.30 Comedy Superheroes Winner 11.10 Comedy Superheroes: 3rd Place 11.50 Comedy Superheroes: Runner-up

3.00pm Two And A Half Men (x2) 4.00 King Of Queens (x2) 5.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (x2) 6.00 Less Than Perfect (x2) 7.00 Scrubs (x2) 8.00 That 70s Show (x2) 9.00 South Park (x2) 10.00 Celebrity Death Match 10.30 South Park 11.00 South Park 11.30 The World Stands Up 12.00am The World Stands Up

2.00pm The FBI Files 3.00 Forensic Detectives 4.00 The Garage 5.00 How It’s Made 5.30 Ultimate Guinness World Records 6.00 American Chopper 7.00 Mythbusters 8.00 How Do They Do It? (x2) 9.00 Mythbusters 10.00 How Do They Do It? (x2) 11.00 The Executioners 12.00am Mythbusters

1.00pm Star Trek 2.00 The Lost World 3.00 FILM: Knight Rider 2000 (1991) 4.50 Psychic Detectives 5.20 FILM: Storm (1999) 7.10 V – Final Battle 9.00 FILM: Jurassic Park (1993) 11.30 FILM: Mimic: Sentinel (2002) 1.05am Heroes 2.05 FILM: Dark Waters (2003) 4.00 Star Trek 5.00 The Lost World

10.40am Medicine Man (1992) 12.40pm Heartwood (1998) 2.25 Big Bully (1996) 4.00 Medicine Man (1992) 6.00 Heartwood (1998) 7.45 US Top 10 8.00 Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang (2005) 10.00 Hustle And Flow (2005) 12.00am Hide And Seek (2005) 1.45 Fall Into Darkness (1996) 3.20 Grind (2003) 5.10 Kid Cop (1996)

8.35am Random Harvest (1942) 11.00 Now, Voyager (1942) 1.10pm That Midnight Kiss (1949) 3.00 Hot Millions (1968) 5.00 Two Weeks In Another Town (1962) 7.00 Betrayed (1954) 9.00 Born Romantic (2000) 10.50 Wild Rovers (1971) 1.20am Arturo’s Island (1962) 3.00 Teleshopping

12.15pm Arizona Summer (2003) 2.15 Miracle In The Woods (1997) 4.00 The King And I (1998) 5.45 The Air Up There (1994) 7.45 Sky Movies Special 8.00 Beauty Shop (2005) 10.00 The Saint (1997) 12.00am Cellular (2004) 2.00 Phantom Of The Opera (2004) 4.30 Arizona Summer (2003)

3.00pm The Iron Petticoat (1956) 4.50 The Bravados (1958) 6.50 Eye Of The Needle (1981) 9.00 The Italian Job (2003) Remake of the British caper classic.

11.05 City Of God (2002) Violent and visceral take on South American gangsters culture.1.35am Very Bad Things (1998) Black comedy.

053_LS313TVsat

3/15/07

6:08 PM

Page 1

saturday 24 The Culture Show BBC2, 7.10pm Lauren Laverne reports on the arts news of the week including the excellent Canadian avant rockers Arcade Fire (left) talking about their new opus. Elsewhere Rowan Atkinson discusses his latest movie, Tom Dyckhoff gives shopping malls a mauling and there’s live music from singersongwriter Patrick Wolf.

Dancing on Ice – Champion of Champions ITV1, 6.40pm Hardy prennials Pip Schofield and Holly Willoughby are back for a fresh one-off climax to the series in which celebs from last year, including Gaynor Faye, Bonnie Langford and Stefan Booth - compete with the three finalists from this year’s competition.

Underground: Arena BBC4, 8pm The Beeb’s documentary strand goes underground for an intimate look at the world’s oldest subterranean transport system used by three million passengers a day. The programme examines its unwritten rules of behaviour and protocol and looks at the literature, music and film inspired by the Underground.

terrestrial

sport

BBC1

BBC2

ITV1

Channel 4

Five

Sky Sports 1

6.00am Breakfast 10.00 Saturday Kitchen 11.30 A Taste Of My Life 12.00pm BBC News; Weather 12.10 Football Focus 1.00 International Boxing 2.15 Rugby 4.40 BBC News; Regional News; Weather 5.00 All New Just For Laughs 5.30 Weakest Link: Goodies And Baddies

6.00am Balamory 6.20 Tweenies 6.40 Big Cook Little Cook 7.00 Roar 7.55 Arthur 8.10 Lizzie McGuire 8.30 The Story Of Tracy Beaker 9.00 Hider In The House 10.00 The Story Of Tracy Beaker 10.30 Time Warp Trio 10.50 Secret Show 11.00 Krypto The Superdog 11.30 Fairly Odd Parents 11.45 Sportsround 12.00pm See Hear 12.45 Coast 12.55 Animal Park 1.55 FILM: The 300 Spartans (1962) 3.45 Meerkat Manor 4.10 Meerkat Manor 4.35 TOTP 2 5.00 Anglo Welsh Rugby Union

6.00am GMTV 9.25 Horrid Henry 9.35 Bel’s Boys 9.50 Tricky Quickies 9.55 Art Attack 10.20 Drake And Josh 10.50 Coastal Kitchen 11.20 Saturday Cooks 12.50pm ITV News; Weather 12.55 Meridian News And Weather 1.00 American Idol 3.00 FILM: Sister Act (1992) 4.40 Meridian News And Weather 4.55 ITV News; Sports Results; Weather 5.10 The Best Of You’ve Been Framed!

6.10am The Hoobs (x2) 7.00 Goalissimo! 8.00 The Morning Line 8.55 Friends 9.25 Musicool 10.25 Popworld 11.15 Amy Winehouse: Video Exclusive 11.20 High School Dance 12.25pm Shipwrecked 2007: The Hut Cam Diaries 12.55 Shipwrecked 2007: Battle Of The Islands 2.00 Channel 4 Racing From Lingfield Park And Newbury 4.05 A Place In The Sun 5.10 Deal Or No Deal Classic 5.55 Monarchy With David Starkey

6.00am Sunrise 6.55 Franklin 7.25 Miss Spider’s Sunny Patch Friends 7.35 Little Princess 7.45 Make Way For Noddy 8.00 Harry And His Bucket Full Of Dinosaurs (x2) 8.30 Rupert Bear (x2) 8.55 Jane And The Dragon 9.25 Don’t Blame The Koalas 9.55 No Girls Allowed 11.00 Xcalibur 11.35 The Gadget Show 12.30pm Built For The Kill 1.00 FILM: The Grass Harp (1998) 2.55 FILM: Something To Talk About (1995) 4.50 FILM: The Train Robbers (1973)

6.20 FILM: Toy Story (1995) Computer-animated fantasy in which a child’s toys come alive whenever he leaves the room. With the voices of Tom Hanks and Tim Allen.

7.35 The National Lottery People’s Quiz Highlights from the auditions as Jamie Theakson, Willima G Stewart, Kate Garraway and Myleene Klass search for the smartest quiz show contestant in the UK. 8.35 Casualty Maverick new consultant Stitch makes a dramatic impact on ED, but not everyone is impressed.

9.25 A Question Of Sport: Uncensored Sue Barker presents a special episode of the sports quiz, a chance to see the moments that were deemed too rude and racy for the normal show.

10.00 BBC News; Weather BBC News; Weather.

10.20 Match Of The Day Highlights from the Euro 2008 qualifiers. Having lost to Croatia in October, England can’t afford to drop more points when they travel to Israel.

11.30 Cricket World Cup Highlights Highlights from the ICC Cricket World Cup 2007, being held in the West Indies.

12.30am Friday Night With Jonathan Ross 2.30 (BST) FILM: A Game For Vultures (1979) 4.20 Joins BBC News 24

7.10 The Culture Show See Highlights.

8.00 Dive Galapagos World champion free diver Tanya Streeter visits the Galapagos Islands to discover how aquatic performance has evolved since the time of the dinosaurs.

8.25 Jeremy Clarkson: Greatest Raid Of All Time Jeremy Clarkson tells the story of what has been called ‘the original Mission Impossible’‚ the audacious commando raid on the German occupied dry dock at St Nazaire in France on March 28 1942.

9.25 FILM: Chocolat (2000) Postwar romance about a mysterious woman who moves to a provincial French town with her daughter to set up a chocolate shop. Starring Johnny Depp.

11.20 FILM: Heaven (2002) Drama.

A woman takes the law into her own hands after the police refuse to arrest the man responsible for her husband’s death. Starring Cate Blanchett, Giovanni Ribisi, Remo Girone, Stefania Orsola Garello and Stefania Rocca.

12.50am Never Mind The Buzzcocks Comedy pop quiz with new host Simon Amstell and regular team captains Bill Bailey and Phill Jupitus.

2.20 (BST) Grumpy Old Men 2.50 The Culture Show

6.10 Harry Hill’s TV Burp Harry Hill crams this week’s must-see TV into another 30 minutes of award-winning telly, featuring previews of The Real Extras, Freaky Eaters and Horizon: My Pet Dinosaur.

6.40 Dancing On Ice - Champion Of Champions See highlights..

7.55 Who Wants To Be A Millionaire? Chris Tarrant presents the big-money quiz where ten contestants compete in the fastest finger first round for a place in the hot seat, where one million pounds is up for grabs.

8.55 Dancing On Ice - The Champions Skate Off It’s results time. Find out which two couples will battle it out in the skate-off to be crowned the Champion of Champions.

9.25 The Dame Edna Treatment Spa Edna opens for business again, as the inimitable Dame welcomes another galaxy of superstars to join her in her exclusive resort. Her guests today include actor Martin Sheen, Brit Art enfante terrible Tracey Emin, and singer Fergie.

10.25 ITV News; Weather 10.40 FILM: The Witches Of Eastwick (1987) Offbeat comedy in which three female divorcees living in a quiet town wish for the perfect man to enter their lives.

12.50am ITV Play: Make Your Play 2.50 (BST) Don’t Move, Improve (x2) 4.00 ITV Nightscreen

6.55 Channel 4 News Including sport and weather.

7.25 Born Survivor: Bear Grylls Former Special Forces adventurer Bear Grylls demonstrates how to survive in the world’s most extreme environments.

8.25 Bremner, Bird And Fortune Topical satirical comedy from impressionist Rory Bremner and regular collaborators John Bird and John Fortune.

9.25 FILM: The Shawshank Redemption (2001) Prison drama about the relationship between two inmates of Shawshank State Prison over two decades. When a New England banker begins a double life sentence in 1946 for the murder of his wife and her lover, he encounters the prison fixer and they become friends. The banker gains respect by giving financial advice to the guards and campaigning for better facilities but really he just wants his freedom.

12.05am FILM: 15 Minutes (2001) Tough action drama. A homicide detective must stop a killer who videotapes his crimes and becomes a media darling. Stars Robert De Niro and Edward Burns.

3.15 (BST) Amy Winehouse: Video Exclusive 3.20 The True Voice Of Murder 4.20 Monsters 4.35 The House Of Memory 4.40 FILM: Out Of The Clouds (1955)

6.30 FILM: Biloxi Blues (1988) Comedy drama about a New York City boy’s coming of age on a remote army base in the last days of World War II. Sent to the Deep South for ten weeks of basic training, the boy is thrown in with an odd assortment of fellow recruits and a psychotic drill sergeant.

8.15 Five News And Sport The latest national and international headlines with Helen Fospero.

8.30 NCIS A bombing range used for target practice by the marines is found to be the dumping ground for mafia victims, among them an undercover FBI agent.

9.25 CSI:NY When a paintball player is found shot dead, Flack realises that a dirty cop under his supervision could be to blame. Mac comes face to face with his deceased wife’s son, a young man he never got the chance to know.

10.25 Law And Order When a cop killer is acquitted and his attorney gunned down, Briscoe and Green suspect revenge is the motive for the law man’s death.

11.25 Grey’s Anatomy (x2) Meredith is mortified when her one night stand shows up at the hospital suffering from a priapism.

2.20am (BST) The Dead Zone (x2) 3.45 Alias (x2) 5.05 The Gadget Show 5.50 Russell Grant’s Postcards

6.00am Aerobics Oz Style 6.30 Premier League Preview 7.00 Soccer AM’s All Sports Show 8.00 UEFA Champions League Weekly 8.30 Premier League Preview 9.00 Soccer AM 12.00pm LIVE International Football (x3) Coverage of the first match to be played at the new Wembley Stadium, as England Under21s take on their Italian counterparts, kick-off 12.30pm. 9.00 International Football 11.00 UEFA Champions League Weekly 11.30 FIFA Futbol Mundial 12.00am LIVE Motor Racing: Indy Car Series 3.30 (BST) UEFA Champions League Weekly 4.00 International Football

Sky Sports 2 6.00am Spirit Of Yachting: Rolex Trofeo SM La Reina 6.30 Super League 8.00 Cricket: World Cup (x2) 10.00 Max Power 11.00 Cricket: World Cup (x2) 1.00pm LIVE Cricket World Cup (x2) One-day cricket from the Beausejour Stadium in St Lucia where England play a Kenyan team that is now much more experienced than when succumbing to a ninewicket defeat against today’s opponents in the 1999 competition 10.00 Sky Sports Classics 10.30 Jack’s Perfect Golfer 11.00 Golf Night 3.00am (BST) Max Power 4.00 Sports Unlimited 5.00 Close

Sky Sports 3 6.00am Sports Unlimited 7.00 NBA Basketball 9.00 Racing News 10.00 WWE Smackdown 12.00pm WWE The Bottom Line 1.00 Friday Fight Night 3.00 LIVE Football: Euro 2008 Qualifier 5.15 Sky Sports Classics 5.30 Jack’s Perfect Golfer 6.00 LIVE Golf Night 10.00 Extreme Championship Wrestling 11.00 WWE Late Night Smackdown 2.00am (BST) Rugby Union: Super 14 4.00 Rugby Union: Super 14

Matt Chittock

extraterrestrial Sky One

BBC3

BBC4

ITV2

ITV3

E4

More4

Living TV

12.00pm Star Trek: The Next Generation (x3) 3.00 Relic Hunter 4.00 The Dog Whisperer (x2) 5.00 Dinolab 6.00 Malcolm In The Middle (x2) 7.00 Futurama (x2) 8.00 The Real Shilpa Shetty 9.00 Bones 10.00 24 11.00 Nip/Tuck 12.00am Sport Uncovered 2.00 (BST) Street Wars

7.00pm Emergency Measures 7.30 Top Gear 8.25 TV Gaffes Galore 9.25 The Most Annoying Pop Songs...We Hate To Love.

Music list show 11.55 Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps (x2) 12.55am Ideal 2.25 (BST) The Real Hustle 2.55 Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps (x2)

7.00pm Wainwright’s Walks 7.30 All Mod Cons 8.00 Underground: Arena.

See highlights. 8.55 Charlie Brooker’s Screenwipe 9.25 First Rites - From The Cradle To The Prom: Timeshift 10.25 FILM: Inheritance (2004) 12.15am Wainwright’s Walks 12.45 (BST) First Rites - From The Cradle To The Prom

2.30pm Holiday Showdown 3.30 Australian Princess 4.30 ITV At The Movies 4.55 Smallville 5.55 Smallville 6.55 Australian Princess 7.55 Dancing On Ice: Defrosted 8.55 Harry Hill’s TV Burp 9.25 Dancing On Ice: Defrosted 9.55 FILM: Apollo 13 (1995) 12.35am Dancing On Ice Champion Of Champions

11.10am Rising Damp 11.40 Jeeves And Wooster (x2) 1.50pm FILM: Chitty Chitty Bang Bang (1968) 4.30 The Casebook Of Sherlock Holmes 5.35 Goodnight Sweetheart 6.10 Kavanagh QC 7.55 Inspector Morse 10.00 Taggart 12.45am The Bill: Sweet Revenge 2.45 (BST) The Bill: Killer On The Run

2.00pm 4Music Presents...

2.30 Hollyoaks Omnibus 5.00 Friends (x2) 6.00 The Simple Life: Interns 6.30 Shipwrecked 2007: The Hut Cam Diaries 7.00 Shipwrecked 2007: Battle Of The Islands 8.00 Friends (x2) 9.00 50 Greatest Comedy Sketches 12.00am Transmission With T-Mobile

9.30am A Place In The Sun 10.00 Time Team (x3) 12.50pm Grand Designs (x4) 5.20 Grand Designs Revisited 6.25 Snowmail 6.30 FILM: Above Us The Waves (1956) 8.25 Time Team Special 9.30 The Last Days Of The Raj 11.05 Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares 12.10am The Closer

11.00am Wonder Woman 12.00pm The Amazing Race 1.00 The Bachelor USA 2.00 Will & Grace (x2) 3.00 Charmed (x4) 7.00 America’s Next Top Model 8.00 The X Files 9.00 New Most Haunted 10.00 Outrageous Fortune 11.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 12.00am Most Haunted

UK TV Gold

Paramount

Discovery

Sci Fi

Sky Movies 1 Sky Movies 2 Film4

TCM

3.00pm Dinnerladies 3.40 Only Fools And Horses 4.20 My Family 5.00 Last Of The Summer Wine 5.40 Keeping Up Appearances (x2) 7.00 Dinnerladies 7.40 Only Fools And Horses 8.20 My Family 9.00 Jonathan Creek 10.10 Gimme Gimme Gimme 10.50 FILM: Jackie Brown (1997) 2.45am (BST) The Office

4.00pm Everybody Loves Raymond (x2) 5.00 King Of Queens (x2) 6.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (x4) 8.00 Everybody Loves Raymond: The Last Laugh 9.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (x2) 10.00 Ray Romano Comedy Half Hour 10.30 Badly Dubbed Porn 11.00 Naked And Funny 11.30 Sexy Cam

8.00am Code Of Silence 9.00 Building The Queen Mary 2 10.00 Kings Of Construction 11.00 How Do They Do It? (x12) 5.00pm The Worst Jobs In History 6.00 How Do They Do It? (x2) 7.00 Mythbusters 8.00 American Chopper 9.00 Big Machines 10.00 American Chopper 11.00 The FBI Files 12.00am Mythbusters

6.00am Robot Wars: The Sixth Wars (x2) 8.00 Teleshopping 11.00 Star Trek (x4) 3.05pm FILM: Thirst (1998) 4.40 FILM: Tron (1982) 6.30 FILM: Jurassic Park (1993) 9.00 Heroes (x3) 12.00am FILM: Judgement Day (1999) 2.50 (BST) Heroes 4.00 The Outer Limits. Spooky Drama. (x2)

1.10pm The Jewel Of The Nile (1985) 3.00 Confessions Of A Teenage Drama Queen (2003) 4.35 Monster Island (2004) 6.10 The Jewel Of The Nile (1985) 8.00 Brokeback Mountain (2004) 10.20 Jarhead (2005) 12.25am Garden State (2004) 3.10 (BST) Exorcist: The Beginning (2004)

8.10am The Shoes Of The Fisherman (1968) 11.00 Lassie Come Home (1943) 12.40pm The Yearling (1946) 3.00 Mrs Miniver (1942) 5.20 Gun Glory (1957) 7.00 Ivanhoe (1952) 9.00 Tommy (1975) Rock musical. 11.05 Where Eagles Dare (1968) 2.55am (BST) The Red Badge Of Courage (1951)

9.45am Home Team (1999) 11.20 Matilda (1996) 1.05pm Funky Monkey (2004) 2.40 Aloha, ScoobyDoo (2005) 4.00 Home Team (1999) 5.45 Matilda (1996) 7.30 Sky Movies News 8.00 Derailed (2005) 10.00 Flightplan (2005) 11.40 Derailed (2005) 2.30am (BST) School For Seduction (2004)

3.00pm The Black Swan (1942) 4.40 The People That Time Forgot (1977) 6.25 The Bridges Of Madison County (1995) Acclaimed Weepy.9.00 The Usual Suspects (1995) Intricate crime drama11.00 The Texas Chain Saw Massacre (1974) Horror Original. 12.35am Baby Boy (2001)

054_LS313_TVsun

3/15/07

5:20 PM

Page 1

sunday 25 Play it Again BBC1, 8pm Six celebrities get free music lessons courtesy of the BBC as they pursue their dream of becoming musicians and dedicate themselves to a rigorous regime of lessons, practice and public performance.

Tonight, comedian Jo Brand learns how to play the organ (fnarr, fnarr).

Northanger Abbey ITV1, 9pm Adaptation of the enduring Jane Austen classic for Sunday night.

Catherine Morland, the daughter of a rural clergyman, sends hearts fluttering when she’s invited to Northanger Abbey, country seat of Henry Tilney.

Henry falls in love with her, but what will happen when her modest means are discovered?

ER E4, 9pm There’s an agonising choice to be made in Chicago’s busiest emergency room as Luka discovers that he must fire a senior doctor due to budget cuts.

Meanwhile Pratt lands in hot water when one of his patients dies from side effects of the treatment he prescribed, plus Gates has a nasty confrontation.

terrestrial

sport

BBC1

BBC2

ITV1

Channel 4

Five

Sky Sports 1

6.00am Breakfast 9.00 Sunday AM 10.00 Heaven And Earth With Gloria Hunniford 11.00 Countryfile 12.00pm The Politics Show 1.00 ‘Allo ‘Allo!

1.25 Keeping Up Appearances 1.55 Diagnosis Murder 2.40 EastEnders 4.35 Sherlock Holmes And The Baker Street Irregulars 5.35 Star Portraits With Rolf Harris

6.00am Balamory 6.20 Tweenies 6.40 Big Cook Little Cook 7.00 Batfink 7.10 The Batman 7.30 Smile 10.00 Something For The Weekend 11.30 Animal Park 12.30pm Moto GP 2007: Jerez 2.00 World Cross Country 3.00 Skating 4.30 Swimming 5.20 Natural World

6.00am GMTV 9.25 Mr Bean: The Animated Series 9.35 Feodor 9.45 Curious George 9.55 Pocoyo 10.05 Jim Jam And Sunny (x2) 10.30 The Championship 11.30 The Sunday Edition With Andrew Rawnsley And Andrea Catherwood 12.30pm Meridian News And Weather 12.35 American Idol 1.05 Dancing On Ice – Champion Of Champions 2.20 Dancing On Ice – The Champions Skate Off 2.50 FILM: Runaway Bride (1999) 4.55 Amanda Holden: Really Wild At Heart 5.55 Planet’s Funniest Animals 6.25 Meridian News And Weather Latest regional news and weather.

6.40 ITV News; Weather The latest national and international news, plus national weather.

7.00 Emmerdale Shadrach gets it into his head that Zak is having an affair with Rosemary.

7.30 Coronation Street The Barlows rake over the past during a long, dark night of the soul. Will Tracy confess all on the eve of her trial?

8.00 The Royal Weatherill decides to return to work after having her baby.

9.00 Northanger Abbey See highlights.

11.00 ITV News; Weather The latest national and international news, plus national weather.

11.10 The South Bank Show Melvyn Bragg talks to veteran jazz trumpeter and broadcaster Humphrey Lyttelton during music and radio recordings. He reflects on his first jazz quartet, formed at Eton College, and his time co-writing the Flook comic strip with fellow jazzman Wally Fawkes.

12.15am The Moral Of The Story Alastair Stewart and a studio panel examine the week’s biggest stories from a moral point of view.

12.45 ITV Play: Glitterball 4.05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 5.00 ITV Nightscreen 5.30 ITV Early Morning News

6.00am Making It 6.05 The Hoobs 6.30 Trans World Sport 7.25 Velux 5 Oceans Ultimate Solo Challenge 7.55 World Cup Skiing 8.50 Popworld 9.45 Hollyoaks Omnibus 12.15pm Shipwrecked 2007: The Hut Cam Diaries 12.50 Musicool 1.55 Beauty And The Geek 2.55 The OC 3.55 Ugly Betty 4.55 Deal Or No Deal 5.45 Time Team

6.00am Tickle, Patch And Friends 6.25 Franny’s Feet 6.35 Sailor Sid 6.40 The Clangers 6.50 Franklin 7.15 Sunny Patch Friends 7.25 Little Princess 7.45 Make Way For Noddy 8.00 Harry And His Bucket Full Of Dinosaurs (x2) 8.30 Rupert Bear 8.45 Rupert Bear 9.00 Jane And The Dragon 9.30 Wild Challenge 10.00 Arthur’s Trip 10.30 A Different Life 11.00 Girl Of The Future 11.35 RAD 12.05pm Rooted 12.35 Divine Designs 1.05 Five 1.10 FILM: Horizons West (1952) 2.40 FILM: Secret Of The Incas (1954) 4.35 Five 4.50 FILM: Salt Water Moose (1996) 6.40 FILM: Stuart Little 2 (2002) Sequel to the children’s story based on the popular book by E B White about the adventures of a small mouse, featuring live action actors and computer-animated characters.

8.00 Grey’s Anatomy Cristina and Preston have philosophical differences over a young boy who needs a heart transplant but doesn’t seem to want it. The interns help Alex prepare for his exam re-sit.

Meredith reminds Izzie about the true meaning of Christmas.

9.00 Grey’s Anatomy Izzie appears to be getting over Alex as she shares definite chemistry with a male heart patient. George treats a young teenage hermaphrodite.

10.00 FILM: White Men Can’t Jump (1992) Comedy set in Los Angeles about an unlikely pair who hustle unwary punters at street basketball.

12.15am NCAA College Basketball NCAA Basketball and the next generation of NBA superstars take to the stage for the USA’s college tournament, considered by many US sports fans to be more exciting than the NBA. Tonight’s programme features the top game from the Sweet 16 as the teams battle it out to make the finals.

1.55 101 Greatest Knockouts 2.25 Football Argentina 4.00 Boxing Classic

6.00am Cricket World Cup (x2) 8.00 International Football 10.00 Jimmy Hill’s Sunday Supplement 11.00 Goals On Sunday 1.00pm UEFA Champions League Weekly 1.30 LIVE Football League (x2). Coverage of the CocaCola League Two match between Lincoln City and Swindon Town at Sincil Bank. 6.00 LIVE Super League 8.00 LIVE Golf Night 12.00am Football League Review 12.30 Super League 2.30 Football League Review

6.05 Songs Of Praise Diane Louise Jordan commemorates the day, 200 years ago, when Parliament passed an Act to abolish the British slave trade.

6.45 Antiques Roadshow Michael Aspel and the team are in Glasgow’s newly refurbished Kelvingrove Museum.

7.35 BBC News; Regional News; Weather 8.00 Play It Again See highlights.

9.00 Castaway A group of Brits are taken as far away as it’s possible to go from their lives in the UK, as they learn to survive on an island off the New Zealand coast.

10.00 BBC News; Regional News; Weather BBC News; Regional News; Weather.

10.15 Extras 10.45 3lbs Hanson and his staff deal with a pregnant woman who has a brain tumor.

11.25 Cricket World Cup Highlights Highlights from the ICC Cricket World Cup 2007, being held in the West Indies.

12.15am FILM: Prefontaine (1997) Drama based on the life of athlete Steve Prefontaine.

2.05 Sign Zone: Holby City with Clifford.

3.05 Antiques Roadshow 3.55 Bill’s Food Cookery 4.20 Joins BBC News 24 5.10 Cricket World Cup

6.10 Meerkat Manor Mozart, who was expelled from the Whiskers a month earlier, is pregnant and has been evicted again. Animal reality show.

7.00 Ms Dynamite In Search Of Nanny Maroon Since she was a child Niomi Daley (aka Ms Dynamite) has been fascinated by stories of Nanny of the Maroons, an extraordinary Jamaican woman who successfully led a revolt by slaves against the British Army. Niomi sets out to discover why, 250 years on, Nanny remains such an inspirational figure in Jamaica.

8.00 The Best Of Top Gear Greatest hits from the Beeb’s motoring show.

9.00 The Trap – What Happened To Our Dreams Of Freedom 10.00 Kombat Opera Presents The South Bragg Show is a docu-drama presented by Melvyn Bragg (Kevin Eldon), looking back at the story of how language first evolved in the Stone Age. Spoof opera.

10.30 Graham Norton Uncut Comedy chat show.

11.15 FILM: Jay And Silent Bob Strike Back (2001) Anarchic comedy about a pair of slacker drug dealers who head to Hollywood after a movie is made about superheroes based on their likeness.

12.55am Kombat Opera Presents 1.25 Family Guy (x2) 2.10 FILM: My Baby’s Daddy (2004)

6.40 Shipwrecked 2007: Battle Of The Islands The eleventh week in paradise sees both camps attempting to woo 24-year-old model Elisha.

7.40 Channel 4 News Including sport and weather.

8.00 Wife Swap USA American version of the US hit.

9.00 Peter Kay Night An evening of entertainment from much-loved comedian Peter Kay, introduced by two of his creations, Max (Kay) and Paddy (Patrick McGuinness).

9.05 It’ll Be Alright On The Phoenix Nights A collection of humorous outtakes from the first series of Phoenix Nights, as selected

by Peter Kay. 9.30 One Hundred And Eighty: The Tour Documentary Behind the scenes and backstage on Peter Kay’s award-winning Mum Wants a Bungalow tour.

10.30 Peter Kay Live At The Manchester Arena Another chance to see Peter Kay’s multi award-winning stand-up show at the Manchester Evening News Arena.

11.30 It’ll Be Alright On The Phoenix Nights Bloopers from the show you’ll have already seen if you’ve got the DVD. 12.00am FILM: Billy Madison (1995) 1.40 FILM: Untamed Heart (1993) 3.30 The Town That’s Looking For Love 4.30 Countdown (x2)

Sky Sports 2 6.00am Motor Racing: A1 Grand Prix 8.00 Motor Racing: Indy Car Series 10.30 Golf Night 2.30pm LIVE Rugby Union. Guinness Premiership rugby from the Memorial Stadium where Bristol play Northampton. 5.00 Gillette World Sport 5.30 Jack’s Perfect Golfer 6.00 LIVE NBA Basketball 8.30 Football League Review 9.00 LIVE Motor Racing: A1 Grand Prix 11.30 Rugby Union 1.00am Golf Night

Sky Sports 3 6.00am Watersports World 7.00 WWE Experience 8.00 WWE Afterburn 9.00 WWE Heat 10.00 Pool: World Cup Of Pool (x2) 12.00pm Cricket World Cup (x2) 2.00 LIVE Cricket World Cup (x2) 11.00 WWE Late Night Afterburn 12.00am WWE Heat 1.00 WWE Experience

Matt Chittock

extraterrestrial Sky One

BBC3

BBC4

ITV2

ITV3

E4

More4

Living TV

9.00am Dream Team 10.00 Buffy The Vampire Slayer 11.00 WWE Experience 12.00pm Robot Wars Extreme 1.00 Star Trek: The Next Generation (x2) 3.00 Relic Hunter 4.00 The Simpsons (x8) 8.00 Dream Team 9.00 24 10.00 Lost 11.00 Rescue Me 12.00am The Dresden Files 1.00 Battlestar Galactica

7.00pm The Real Hustle 7.30 FILM: Men In Black (1997) 9.00 Lucy: Teen Transsexual 10.00 Castaway Exposed 11.00 Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps (x2) 12.00am Ideal 12.30 Lucy: Teen Transsexual 1.25 Torchwood 2.15 Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps (x2) 3.15 Close

8.05pm Arena: Little Platform, Big Stage 9.00 Wedding Rites – In Sickness And In Health: Timeshift 10.00 TV’s Black Pioneers 11.00 Charlie Brooker’s Screenwipe 11.30 Wainwright’s Walks 12.00am Wedding Rites – In Sickness And In Health: Timeshift 1.00 TV’s Black Pioneers

10.10am Harry Hill’s TV Burp 10.40 Emmerdale Omnibus 1.30pm FILM: Apollo 13 (1995) 4.05 Coronation Street Omnibus 6.30 American Idol (x2) 9.00 Supernatural 10.00 FILM: Shaun Of The Dead (2004) 12.00am Coronation Street 12.30 Steven Seagal’s Orange Playlist 1.00 ITV Play: Glitterball

10.40am Wycliffe 11.45 The Adventures Of Sherlock Holmes (x2) 1.55pm Kavanagh QC 3.30 Inspector Morse 5.45 A Dangerous Man: Lawrence After Arabia 7.55 Richard The Lionheart 9.00 Inside The Actors Studio 10.00 FILM: Schindler’s List (1993) 1.45am Chancer (x2) 3.40 Emmerdale Omnibus

2.10pm Popworld 3.00 Young, Sexy And... Spoiled 4.00 Friends (x2) 5.00 Switched Up! 6.00 The OC 7.00 Friends (x2) 8.00 Ugly Betty 9.00 ER 10.00 Desperate Housewives 11.00 Skins 12.05am Switched Up! 1.05 Popworld 1.50 Skins 2.50 Young, Sexy And... Spoiled 3.30 My Big Fat Obnoxious Boss

11.00am Scrapheap Challenge Roadshow 12.00pm Scrapheap Challenge (x2) 2.00 Time Team 3.00 The 100 Greatest War Films 6.05 Deal Or No Deal 6.55 Bremner, Bird And Fortune 8.00 The West Wing 9.00 Secret Millionaire 10.00 Bodyshock 11.05 Father Ted (x2) 12.10am Heroes Of Comedy

11.00am Wonder Woman 12.00pm America’s Next Top Model 1.00 The Bachelor USA 2.00 America’s Next Top Model (x4) 6.00 Top Chef 7.00 The Real Extras 8.00 Extreme: Skinny Celebrities 2 9.00 CSI: Miami 10.00 Criminal Minds 11.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 12.00am Most Haunted

UK TV Gold

Paramount

Discovery

Sci Fi

Sky Movies 1 Sky Movies 2 Film4

TCM

10.50am FILM: Carry On Screaming (1966) 12.45pm Only Fools And Horses 2.35 Open All Hours (x2) 3.55 Porridge (x2) 5.15 FILM: Carry On Screaming (1966) 7.10 Only Fools And Horses 9.00 Dalziel And Pascoe 11.00 The Vicar Of Dibley 11.55 Gimme Gimme Gimme (x2) 1.15am Have I Got 2002 For You

9.00am Everybody Loves Raymond (x20) 7.00pm Everybody Loves Raymond: The Last Laugh 8.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (x2) 9.00 South Park (x2) 10.00 Richard Pryor: Live In Concert 11.35 Badly Dubbed Porn 12.05am Naked And Funny 12.35 Sexy Cam (x3) 1.30 South Park (x2)

9.00am Building The Queen Mary 2 10.00 Kings Of Construction 11.00 How It’s Made (x16) 7.00pm Engineering The World Rally 8.00 Campervan Crisis 8.30 Beetle Crisis 9.00 American Chopper Special 10.00 World’s Lost Tribes 11.00 Mythbusters (x2) 1.00am Brinks-Mat: The Greatest Heist

11.00am Scariest Places On Earth 12.05pm FILM: Landspeed (2001) 2.00 FILM: Storm (1999) 3.50 FILM: Capricorn One (1978) 6.10 FILM: Disappearance (2002) 8.00 A Town Called Eureka 9.00 Medium 10.00 Heroes 11.00 FILM: Silent Warnings (2003) 12.35am Erotic Misadventures Of The Invisible Man

8.45am Sgt Bilko (1996) 10.35 Bean (1997) 12.30pm A Month Of Sundays (1989) 2.10 Sgt Bilko (1996) 4.00 Bean (1997) 6.20 The Adventures Of Sharkboy And Lavagirl (2005) 8.00 Transamerica (2005) 9.50 Into The Blue (2005) 11.45 Kinsey (2004) 1.45am Bee Season (2005) 3.30 Being Julia (2004)

6.45am The Green Years (1946) 8.50 Knights Of The Round Table (1953) 11.00 White Heat (1949) 1.05pm Ask Any Girl (1959) 3.00 Royal Wedding (1951) 4.50 Sweethearts (1938) 7.00 Bhowani Junction (1956) 9.00 A Night To Remember (1958) 11.20 Ice Station Zebra (1968) 2.00am Mark Of The Vampire (1935)

2.20pm Big Top Pee-wee (1988) 4.00 Mad Hot Ballroom 5.55 Mrs Doubtfire (1993) 8.00 The Poseidon Adventure 9.30 The Poseidon Adventure 11.00 Goal! (2005) 1.05am The Jacket (2005) 2.55 Commandments (1997) 4.35 To Wong Foo, Thanks For Everything! Julie Newmar (1995)

3.00pm Laura (1944) Aged melodrama that inspired David Lynch for Twin Peaks. 4.40 Julia (1977) 7.00 A Shot In The Dark (1964) 9.00 Collateral (2004) Thriller starring Tom Cruise. 11.15 LA Confidential (1997) Hardboiled thriller with Kim Basinger. 1.50am The Return (2003)

055_LS313_TVmon

3/15/07

5:23 PM

Page 1

monday 26 Dispatches: Cameron: Toff at the Top Channel 4, 8pm As David Cameron looks ever more likely to become the next PM, political columnist Peter Hitchens takes a caustic look at his rise to power. Delving into Cameron’s past Hitchens discovers a politician who, until recently, presented himself as a hard-line Tory.

Mobile ITV1, 9pm New drama. A soldier in Iraq is sent home after his wife and young child are killed in a hit and run incident. Soon after the news, he’s sent a text message which apparently reveals the identity of the driver. He starts to seek revenge, enlisting the help of his terrified grandfather- but as the plot thickens, who can he trust?

The British Way of Death BBC4, 9pm Daniela Nardini (left) narrates a documentary exploring how the British funeral has acquired a new spirit of informality. Today’s departed are just as likely to be sent on their way to the strains of Robbie Williams as they are to a classic hymn. So are we now improvising rituals to fit in with our secular society?

terrestrial

sport

BBC1

BBC2

ITV1

Channel 4

Five

Sky Sports 1

6.00am Breakfast 9.15 Don’t Get Done, Get Dom 10.00 Escape To The Country 11.00 To Buy Or Not To Buy 11.30 Car Booty 12.15pm Cash In The Attic 1.00 BBC News; Weather 1.30 Regional News And Weather 1.40 Neighbours 2.05 Doctors 2.35 Diagnosis Murder 3.20 BBC News; Weather; Regional News 3.25 Maya And Miguel 3.45 The Likeaballs 4.00 50/50 4.30 The Slammer 5.00 Angelica: Time Traveller 5.25 Newsround 5.35 Neighbours

6.00am - 11am Children’s TV 12.00pm Daily Politics 12.30 Working Lunch 1.00 What? Where? When?

Why? 1.15 Something Special 1.30 Making A Meal Of It 2.00 Escape To The Country 3.00 Through The Keyhole 3.45 Flog It! 4.30 Ready Steady Cook 5.15 The Weakest Link

6.00am GMTV 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 10.30 This Morning 12.30pm Loose Women 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News; Weather 2.00 Midsomer Murders 3.00 Daily Cooks 4.00 Poirot 5.00 Soapstar Superchef

6.00am The Cubeez 6.10 The Hoobs 6.35 The Hoobs 7.00 Freshly Squeezed 7.30 Friends 8.00 Just Shoot Me 8.30 Just Shoot Me 9.00 Frasier 9.30 My Crazy Life 10.00 Hardeep Does Race 10.30 Gay To Z 11.00 My Big Gay Prom 12.00pm News At Noon 12.30 FILM: Bear Island (1980) 2.30 A Place In The Sun 3.30 Countdown 4.15 Deal Or No Deal 5.00 Richard And Judy

6.00am Tickle, Patch And Friends 6.25 Franny’s Feet 6.35 The Clangers 6.45 Hi-5 7.20 The Beeps 7.30 Little Princess 7.45 Make Way For Noddy 8.00 Fifi And The Flowertots 8.15 Peppa Pig 8.25 Thomas & Friends 8.40 Titch 8.50 Mio Mao 9.00 The Wright Stuff 10.30 Trisha Goddard 11.30 Five News 12.00pm Home And Away 12.30 The Diet Doctors Inside And Out 1.30 FILM: Harvest Of Fire (1996) 3.35 FILM: Appointment With Death (1988) 5.30 Five News

6.00 BBC News And Weather 6.30 South East Today; Weather Regional news magazine.

7.00 My Family Domestic sitcom.

Ben takes up pyramid selling.

7.30 Shopping The Supermarkets Sally Magnusson presents a series about Britain’s supermarkets.

8.00 EastEnders Rob is shocked by Dawn’s savvy, but May won’t accept there is a problem.

8.30 Panorama Vigorous investigation of a topical issue.

9.00 New Street Law Drama series which follows the exploits and cases of two rival barristers’ chambers in Manchester.

10.00 BBC News; Regional News; Weather 10.35 Sleep Clinic The consultants are facing their biggest challenge to date‚ how to bring some peace to Derek’s nights, currently punctutated by extreme dream enactments which have left him with broken ribs, fingers, cuts and scrapes.

11.05 FILM: The Astronaut’s Wife (1999) Sci-fi thriller with Johnny Depp as an astronaut returning to earth after a mysterious experience in space.

12.55am Sign Zone: The 34 Stone Teenager 1.50 Top Gear 2.50 Five Ways To Save The World 3.50 Joins BBC News 24 5.00 Cricket World Cup

6.00 Eggheads 6.30 A Taste Of My Life Lenny Henry is taken on a trip down memory lane as his younger brother and sister cook up ‘Saturday Soup’ and Nigel attempts to recreate wife Dawn French’s perfect fry-up.

7.00 The Trees That Made Britain In the name of research, Jon and Tony experiment with early gunpowder and come face to face with the Prince of Wales while doing tree work on his estate.

7.30 The Making Of Jeremy Clarkson: Greatest Raid Of All Time A behind-the-scenes look at Jeremy Clarkson’s historical documentary about the daring World War II commando raid on the port at St Nazaire.

8.00 University Challenge 8.30 Return To Lullingstone Castle Documentary chronicling the ongoing struggle of Tom Hart Dyke and his parents Guy and Sarah, as they attempt to secure the future of their 700-year-old family home.

9.00 Slave Children 10.30 Newsnight Round up of the day’s stories.

11.20 World Swimming Highlights 12.10am Taken Sci-fi drama from Steven Speilberg..

1.30 Joins BBC News 24 2.00 GCSE Bitesize Revision 4.00 GCSE Bitesize Revision: Design And Technology 2

6.00 Meridian Tonight Local news magazine. Including Meridian weather.

6.30 ITV Evening News; Weather The latest national and international news.

7.00 Emmerdale Zak worries that Shadrach will tell Lisa about his supposed affair with Rosemary.

7.30 Coronation Street Tracy’s finally in the dock.

8.00 Border Wars: Tonight Home Office whistle-blower Steve Moxon believes Britain is buckling under the burden of mass migration - but is he right?.

8.30 Coronation Street Deirdre has a crisis of confidence - but will she leave her daughter in the lurch?

9.00 Mobile New drama. See highlights.

10.30 ITV News; Weather The latest national and international news, plus national weather.

Including local news programmes.

11.00 The Dame Edna Treatment Her guests today include actor Martin Sheen, Brit Art enfante terrible Tracey Emin, and singer Fergie.

12.00am UEFA Champions League Weekly Trevor Harris and Claire Tomlinson preview next week’s quarter-final, first-leg ties.

12.30 ITV Play: Glitterball 4.05 ITV At Reading 2005 5.00 ITV Nightscreen 5.30 ITV Early Morning News

6.00 The Simpsons The Simpsons visit a theme park based on the violent Itchy and Scratchy cartoons.

6.30 Hollyoaks Russ decides to do things his own way following Mercedes’s proposal.

7.00 Channel 4 News Including sport and weather.

7.55 The Political Slot Labour Environment Spokesman Chris Huhne visits York Council’s Eco Depot, a selfventing, carbon neutral, solar powered headquarters for the city’s street cleaning and refuse collection activities.

8.00 Dispatches: Cameron: Toff At The Top See highlights.

9.00 Animal Farm Olivia Judson and Giles Coren present a look behind the headlines at the rapid advances being made in the scientific world, from genetic modification to cloning and tissue engineering.

10.00 ER 11.00 The Sopranos The sale of Barone Sanitation is complicated as Jason cannot get to grips with how the system works.

12.15am 4 Music: Live From Abbey Road 1.15 Transmission With T-Mobile 2.15 FILM: My Mother Frank (2000) 4.00 Chez Mimi 4.15 When The Romans Came To Wales 4.30 All Change 4.50 Number Crew (x2)

6.00 Home And Away Kim and Rachel finally tie the knot, but the celebrations are dramatically cut short when a surprise visitor makes a shocking announcement.

6.30 Everybody Hates Chris Chris tries to put together the right outfit for the school pictures in order to convince the other kids that he is cool.

7.00 Five News National and international news with Kirsty Young.

7.15 The Gadget Show The team look at the next generation of games consoles.

8.00 The Perfect Disaster: Solar Storm Five’s major new Natural Disaster series continues.

9.00 Britain’s Extraordinary TenYear-Olds Documentary examining the lives of three ten-year-old children who have triumphed over extreme adversity.

10.00 Prison Break Michael’s escape plan is in danger of being derailed.

11.00 FILM: Traffic (2000) Crime drama examining America’s war on drugs through a series of interconnected stories. Starring Catherine Zeta Jones.

1.35am USPGA Golf 2.25 NASCAR Nextel Cup 3.15 Now Is The Time: Night Of Combat - Kick Boxing 4.05 Boxing: Fight Of The Week 5.10 Ironman Austria

6.00am UEFA Champions League Weekly 6.30 Football League Review 7.00 WWE The Bottom Line 8.00 Cricket World Cup 9.00 Football League Review 9.30 UEFA Champions League Weekly 10.00 Cricket World Cup 11.00 Super League 1.00pm Rugby Union 2.30 Super League 4.30 UEFA Champions League Weekly 5.00 Football League Review 5.30 Cricket World Cup Special 7.30 LIVE Conference Football 10.00 You’re On Sky Sports 11.30 Soccer AM: The Best Bits 12.30am Conference Football 2.00 Soccer AM: The Best Bits 3.00 You’re On Sky Sports

Sky Sports 2 6.00am Aerobics Oz Style 6.30 High Altitude 7.00 Aerobics Oz Style 7.30 High Altitude 8.00 Golf Night 12.00pm Motor Racing: A1 Grand Prix 2.00 Golf Night 6.00 LIVE Golf Special 11.00 World Motor Sport (x2) 1.30 Cricket World Cup Special

Sky Sports 3 9.30am Rugby Union 11.00 Aerobics Oz Style 11.30 Racing News 12.00pm Football League Review 12.30 UEFA Champions League Weekly 1.00 Fishing: Bass Fishing 2.00 Football League Review 2.30 NBA Basketball 4.30 WWE Raw 6.30 Soccer AM: The Best Bits 7.30 LIVE Speedway: Elite League 9.30 Cricket World Cup Special 11.30 Wild Spirits 12.00am Extreme Championship Wrestling 1.00 WWE Heat 2.00 WWE Late Night Raw

Matt Chittock

extraterrestrial Sky One

BBC3

BBC4

ITV2

ITV3

E4

More4

Living TV

12.00pm Revelations 1.00 Angel 2.00 Tru Calling 3.00 Jake 2.0 4.00 Stargate SG1 (x2) 6.00 Stargate Atlantis 7.00 The Simpsons (x4) 9.00 Corkscrewed 10.00 When Sports Stars See Red 12.00am Cold Case 1.00 Stargate Atlantis . Sci-fi.1.50 Uncut! Naked In Westminster 2.40 Uncut!

The Villa

7.00pm Castaway 8.00 Castaway: The Last 24 Hours 8.30 Help! My Dog’s As Fat As Me 9.00 The 34 Stone Teenager: Six Months On 10.00 EastEnders 10.30 Rush Hour 11.00 Jonathan Ross’s Japanorama 11.30 American Dad (x2) 12.15am The 34 Stone Teenager: Six Months On

8.00pm The World 8.30 The Black 18th Century 9.00 The British Way Of Death 9.40 The Victorian Way Of Death: From Body Snatching To Burning 10.30 Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy 11.10 Charlie Brooker’s Screenwipe 11.40 Wainwright’s Walks 12.10am The Black 18th Century

4.30pm Sally Jessy Raphael 5.15 Airline USA 5.45 Judge Judy 7.00 Movies Now 7.15 Dancing On Ice - Champion Of Champions 8.30 Dancing On Ice - The Champions Skate Off 9.00 FILM: Shaun Of The Dead (2004) 10.55 Coronation Street (x2) 11.55 FILM: The Scorpion King (2002)

12.25pm Robin Of Sherwood 1.35 Lovejoy 2.40 Never The Twain 3.10 Home To Roost 3.45 Film File 3.50 Cagney And Lacey 4.55 Quantum Leap 5.55 Due South 6.55 Lovejoy 8.00 The Bill: Sweet Revenge 9.00 Numb3rs 10.00 Rose And Maloney 11.00 Bad Girls 12.05am Lovejoy

2.00pm Switched 2.30 One Tree Hill 3.30 Smallville: Superman The Early Years 4.30 Hollyoaks. Teen soap.

5.00 Friends (x2) 6.00 Scrubs (x2) 7.00 Hollyoaks 7.30 The War At Home 8.00 Friends (x2) 9.00 FILM: She’s All That (1999) 10.50 Ulrika... Am I A Sex Addict?

11.55 Scrubs 12.25am Scrubs

4.00pm FILM: Appointment In London (1953) 5.50 3 Minute Wonder: Second Lives (x3) 6.05 Deal Or No Deal 7.00 Grand Designs 8.00 More4 News 8.30 The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 9.00 Relocation, Relocation 10.00 The Yellow House 11.40 NYPD Blue 12.40am The Daily Show Global Edition

12.00pm Charmed 1.00 Will & Grace (x2) 2.00 Bewitched (x2) 3.00 Missing 4.00 Charmed (x2) 6.00 America’s Next Top Model 7.00 The X Files 8.00 Top Chef 9.00 America’s Next Top Model 10.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 11.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 12.00am The X Files

UK TV Gold

Paramount

Discovery

Sci Fi

Sky Movies 1 Sky Movies 2 Film4

TCM

3.00pm My Family 3.40 Porridge 4.20 Dinnerladies 5.00 The Bill 6.00 The Bill 7.00 Porridge 7.40 Open All Hours 8.20 My Family 9.00 The Vicar Of Dibley (x2) 10.35 Absolutely Fabulous 11.15 The Vicar Of Dibley (x2) 12.50am Absolutely Fabulous 1.30 Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps 2.05 Holby City

3.00pm Two And A Half Men (x2) 4.00 King Of Queens (x2) 5.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (x2) 6.00 Less Than Perfect (x2) 7.00 Scrubs (x2) 8.00 That 70s Show (x2) 9.00 Two And A Half Men (x2) 10.00 Sex And The City 10.35 South Park (x2) 11.35 The World Stands Up (x2) 12.35am Sex And The City

4.00pm The Garage 5.00 How It’s Made 5.30 Ultimate Guinness World Records 6.00 American Chopper 7.00 Mythbusters 8.00 How Do They Do It? 8.30 How It’s Made 9.00 American Chopper 10.00 Engineering The World Rally 11.00 Salvage Squad 12.00am Mythbusters 1.00 Psychic Witness

1.00pm Star Trek 2.00 The Lost World 3.00 FILM: Combustion (2004) 5.05 FILM: The Adventures Of Buckaroo Banzai Across The Eighth Dimension (1984) 7.10 FILM: Bedazzled (2000) 9.00 Medium 10.00 Heroes 11.00 Medium (x5) 4.00 Star Trek 5.00 The Lost World

8.35am Between Love And Honor (1994) 10.10 The Boy Who Could Fly (1986) 12.00pm October Sky (1999) 1.50 Pride And Prejudice (2005) 4.00 The Boy Who Could Fly (1986) 6.00 October Sky (1999) 8.00 Pride And Prejudice (2005) 10.10 The Color Purple (1985) 12.25am Ocean’s Twelve (2004)

11.00am A Night To Remember (1958) 1.20pm Summer Holiday (1963) Cheesey musical. 3.00 Cat On A Hot Tin Roof (1958) Drama. 4.55 42nd Street (1933) Musical. 6.35 The 25th Hour (1967) 9.00 Mrs Soffel (1984) 11.00 The Haunting (1963) 12.55am The Fixer (1968) 3.00 Teleshopping

1.10pm Can’t Be Heaven (1998) 2.50 Gone Fishin’ (1997) 4.30 Little Man Tate (1991) 6.15 Doctor Dolittle 3 (2006) 8.00 Anchorman: The Legend Of Ron Burgundy (2004) 9.45 UK Top 10 10.00 Saw (2004) 11.50 Legionnaire (1998) 1.50am Last Dance (1996) 3.40 I Want Candy: Sky Movies Special

3.00pm Prince Valiant (1954) 5.05 A Bell For Adano (1945) 7.05 Evolution (2001) Poor semisequel to Ghostbusters.

9.00 The Thomas Crown Affair (1968) Modish 60’s drama. 11.00 Narc (2001) 1.00am The Hard Word (2002) Violent drug drama about a narcotic agent lured back to the force.