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www.latest7.co.uk
latest
Cars The weekly listings and TV guide 1–7 May 2007 FREE
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jobs gripping drama fantastic festival fun at brighton dome
highly paid professional positions property manager property moves see page 60
it’s all happening the sublime and the ridiculous in our festival focus fiery town take time off in lewes
carr blimey jimmy presents the latest 7 festival awards on the radio! latest soup 97.2FM mon-fri 4-6pm
pa secretary city property developments see page 61
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latest 7 5 Cars The F1-inspired Renaultsport Clio 197
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contents 34 Latest hot list Our top restaurants, cafés and bars
6 Social diary James Taylor wows Brighton Dome
35 Recipe Chicken with Serrano ham from Quick Low-Carb by Elaine Gardner
7 What Katie says Seeking the lucky three
36 Cinema
8 Eminemmylou
Local screenings listed and reviewed
Steve Bagg’s ode to a carrot
38 Music
8 Dani’s diary Dani faces anxiety as the summer weather reminds her of harder times
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Damien Rice, Lou Rhodes, plus new music news and the local scene
40 Radio Reverb
8 Backlash
Connecting people by the forces of radio
Chris Pacey finds bouncers a downer
40 Foxy Mamma Malone
10 Celebcity
Unimpressed with baby’s makeover
Frank Bruno hits Brighton. Know what I mean?
41 Nightlife Upcoming club nights and late bars
11 Competitions Our fantastic giveaway of new releases
42 Gay Wild Fruit’s birthday party for Her Maj
11 Crossword Test your knowledge in cryptic or quick
43 Theatre Taylor Mac’s one-person tour de force
12 Bare cheek Hove factually and ‘informed’ gossip
45 Events and kids Claytime for kids at Komedia
12 Stars The week ahead with Astral Angi
48 Art Petrusco at North Laine Photography
13 Stand-up comedy Victoria’s plans to see and be seen
49 Latest listings The hottest tickets for the week ahead
13 Marc the vet Take a leap of faith with amphibians
50 Reviews Casting a critical eye over recent shows
17 Brighton Festival Our packed 10-page special of the must-see shows at Brighton Dome this May, including lunchtime concerts, theatre shows and literature events
51 Day-by-day guide Our complete guide to local events
Find your venue with our handy guide to complement our listings
29 Lewes Discover Lewes treaures with Pen To Paper, The Baby Shop, Circa and more
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58 Venue directory
59 Latest jobs
38
Top media sales job available in Sussex plus Wired Sussex and Lynn Cannell
31 Health The many benefits of colonics
62 Latest TV
33 Food Tradition and snails in pretty surroundings at The Bell Inn, Yarpole
Complete television listings guide, this weeks must-see TV movies and Dani’s unique take on recent shows
01273 818150 Editor Bill Smith Business Director Angi Mariani Advertising Director Lynne Edwards Creative Director Andrew Kay Production Director Fiona McTernan Finance Manager Sharon Caple Art Director Stephen King Production Manager Neil Ive Advertising Manager Kate Knight Website Manager Paul Burgess
Production Editor Victoria Nangle
Music Editor Jeff Hemmings
Production Assistant Zara Friend
Staff Writers Matt Chittock Craig Driver Katie Glass
Chief Sub-editor Wendy McAngus Senior Sub-editor Philippa Smith Sub-editors Ashley Bird Hayley Carmichael Viv Craske Joe Curtin Billy Imrie Anita Wilkinson Designers Anand Day Peter Knight Jamie Powell Steve Sawyer
Advertising Sales Rhoda Barker Emma Burton Administration Heather Holland Claire Peerless Stefan Reszczynski Latest Homes Unit 1, Level 5 North New England House New England Street Brighton BN1 4GH
Editorial: editorial@thelatest.co.uk Advertising: lynne@thelatest.co.uk
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Festival city Hit me with your rhythms quick Magdalena Reasons to be Reising cheerful, parts 1, 2, 316. Yes, that’s 316 pages of the latest in homes, what’s on, music and art packed into this week’s Latest magazines. Our biggest issues ever, we’re still lying down from packing the magazines with the hottest this city has to offer. Inside Latest Art, the special Brighton Festival issue, we look inside the Artists’ Open Houses to find out how it all works. Katie Glass goes in search of diamonds, trailing in the footsteps of her artcollecting hero, Charles Saatchi. And there’s the indispensable guide to the Artists’ Open Houses as a supplement inside. This is the week that the Festival wakes the city and a welcoming purple cow appears on the Old Steine. The Brighton Festival Fringe starts celebrating after the Brighton Festival Children’s Parade on 5 May, from 1pm until late. Known as Fringe City, this Fringe extravaganza in Jubilee Square is a one-day celebration of all that is Fringe 2007 – a brandnew Fringe event that’s totally free, right in the heart of the city. Come and see the best and most exciting bits of the Fringe programme brought together on five stages (including one double-decker bus). Pick up a Fringe passport, get it stamped and pick up your free treats and special discount deals, plus competitions and huge giveaways. During the day, there will be a track stand competition. Members of the public are invited to test their skills by balancing on their bikes against the clock. The world record hasn’t been broken since 1968! To get your ticket for a chance to win a top-notch bike, text ‘Fringe’ to QUICK (78425) and you will get a special message. (Texts cost 35p.) After all the art, all the Fringe excitement, and reading all 316 pages, you might need to lie down too. Get your energy back by visiting Magdalena Reising’s beautiful harp and flute recital on 5, 6, and 7 May at 6pm at 54 Brunswick Square. Text 07786 405221 for more details. Then jump back up and check out Priorité à Gauche – Remastered, in the wonderful Udderbelly venue on 5 May at 9pm. For tickets call 01273 709709. And if you want to just lie in a hammock, being entertained by the best broadcaster in Brighton, tune in to Jeff Hemmings, Monday to Friday on 97.2FM, Latest Soup on Radio Reverb. Ah, bliss!
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Clio carnival
Simon Asphar checks out the Renaultsport Clio 197 F1 Team R27, the limited edition hot hatch produced to celebrate Renault’s F1 successes The Renaultsport Clio 197 is already being hailed by many as the undisputed small hot hatch class benchmark, but Renault’s performance arm has already sought to move the game onto the next level with the launch of the eagerly anticipated Clio Renaultsport 197 F1 Team R27. This new limited edition of 500 is also the first time the Cup chassis has been seen on the new Renaultsport Clio 197, and will become optional on the standard model later in 2007. Built at the Renaultsport factory in Dieppe, the new addition to the Clio Renaultsport range is inspired by the back-to-back success of the FIA World Championship winning Renault F1 Team, and understandably shares part of its name with this year’s Grand Prix car, the R27. In keeping with Renault’s tradition for offering a Cup chassis option on its models for those performance enthusiasts who want an even more focused driving experience, the Cup chassis fitted as standard includes a raft of enhancements for both track and road driving. Among them, the ride height has been lowered by 7mm compared to the Clio Renaultsport 197 to ensure a lower centre of gravity and reduced load transfer for more effective cornering. Its cornering power has been improved even further by the springs which have been stiffened by 27 per cent at the front and 30 per cent at the rear, giving reduced body roll and pitch when cornering. With a ten per cent increase in bending stiffness and more flexible bump stops, the double-axis strut suspension system is also
more stable when braking and offers greater steering precision when negotiating bends in quick succession. Lastly, it is equipped with the standard Clio Renaultsport 197’s robust, powerful Brembo brake system, using 312mm ventilated disks at the front and 300mm solid disks at the rear.
“This continues Renault’s rich heritage for producing grininducing hot hatches” Clio Renaultsport 197 F1 Team R27 is powered by a normally aspirated 2.0 16v engine and mated to a six-speed manual gearbox. Offering a wide power band, maximum power of 197hp is available at 7,250rpm, with 215Nm of torque at 5,550 rpm. The new flagship Clio Renaultsport reaches 0–62mph in 6.9 seconds and takes only 27.5 seconds to travel 1,000m from a standing start. Combined fuel consumption is 33.6 mpg with carbon dioxide emissions of 199 grams per kilometre. The R27 has standard decals on the front, rear, roof and door to celebrate Renault F1 Team’s championship victories in 2005 and 2006. Customers also have the option to choose not to have the roof and door decals if they prefer, at no additional cost. In keeping with its motorsport lineage, the new version also features Brembo four-piston brake callipers at the front, Liquid Yellow paint which originally appeared on the Clio
Renaultsport 182 and Clio Renaultsport V6 255 and exclusive Renault F1 Team badging. Derived from the world of Formula One, it also boasts a rear air diffuser which channels airflow to increase downforce on the car’s rear end, so counteracting lift. Meanwhile, on the side of the car, extractor vents on the front wings reduce turbulence to optimise the car’s drag co-efficient and facilitate the outflow of under-bonnet heat. Including Liquid Yellow, the new model is available in six colours, including two non-metallic (Ultra Red and Racing Blue) and four metallic colours (Liquid Yellow, Deep Black, Nimbus and Albi Blue). Continuing Renault’s rich heritage for producing grin-inducing hot hatches, this Clio features £1,500 worth of extra kit within its price tag of £17,250. The Clio Renaultsport 197 F1 Team R27 offers the same comprehensive standard-equipment list as the Clio Renaultsport 197, but in addition to air conditioning, cruise control, ESP and speed limiter, the new version adds 17” anthracite-coloured alloy wheels, red painted brake callipers, Renaultsport Recaro Seats, extra tinted rear windows, 60W radio and MP3-compatible CD player with four speakers, two tweeters and fingertip remote controls, and a 1 to 500 numbered plaque and F1 Team decals. The Recaro seats are usually an £850 option but feature as standard on the Clio Renaultsport 197 F1 Team R27, offering harness cut-outs for a sporty look as well as a weight saving of six kilograms. The numbered plate alongside the handbrake leaves you in no doubt as to the unique sporting heritage of the Clio Renaultsport 197 F1 Team R27.
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LATESTDIARY
latestdiary
Premier catering launch party Brighton’s newest premier catering service, Juniper Catering, held its launch party at Audio on Wednesday 18 April. Juniper is offering private catering, corporate hospitality and wedding planning. The BBQ at Audio was fired up while guests mingled on the terrace, enjoying the warm spring evening. Juniper operates from a bespoke industrial kitchen and is ideally positioned to cater for events from across the south and further afield. For more information visit www.junipercatering.com
With Tim Richardson
Celebrity voices as art A preview exhibition of ongoing collaborative work between synesthetic artist, Philippa Stanton, who can ‘see’ sounds as colour and shapes, and award-winning photographer, Cambridge Jones, has opened at the Theatre Royal Brighton. The show is called PerSona and features famous faces, voices and synesthetic art inspired by those voices. The 20 celebrities given the treatment include Timothy Spall, Aidan McArdle, Johnny Vegas and Greta Scacchi, and the exhibition runs until 27 May.
Caraline Brown (Midnight Communications) and Chris Edwardes (The Hanbury Club)
The Timothy Spall display
Cambridge Jones (award winning photographer), Aidan McArdle (actor) and Philippa Stanton (synesthetic artist)
Harvey Waller (ITV Local), Toni Darton (Arts Council) and John Whiting (artist)
Stephanie St James, Ambrose Harcourt (Ambrose Harcourt PR) and Anna Carey (Ambrose Harcourt PR)
A friend indeed James Taylor treated a packed Brighton Dome to a superb show on Wednesday 18 April. From chilled-out ‘You've Got a Friend’ to ‘The Frozen Man’ you couldn't help but feel heart-warmed by the songs, and by Taylor’s witty anecdotes drawn from his own life. Playing as a one-man band, he performed with a large home-made drum machine, and was given three standing ovations.
Oliver Hyde (Juniper Catering) and Michael Harwood (Juniper Catering)
James Taylor, left, with actor Patrick Bergin 6 latest 7
If you have an event you would like featured please email editorial@thelatest.co.uk
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KATIE’S COLUMN
What Katie says Katie contemplates the concept of luck, as The Grand National is under starter’s orders…
Luck be a lady… “There are three things that make you lucky,” Angi said. We were waiting for The Grand National to start. I hoped that those three things would be Joe’s Edge, Simon and Idle Talk – because I’ve got £2 each way on each of them. There was silence. The horses shuffled across the grass, lining up for the starting gun. “So… What would they be then?” I asked. After all, this was Astral Angi
Imag e: Ch ris A shfie ld
talking; maybe she had some magic, astrological advice that could change my life for the better. Or at least win me £50. “Oh?” Angi looked confused. “The three things? That make you lucky? What are they?” She may be Brighton’s most insightful mystic, but she can also be a bit dippy. “Oh, yes, right. Well one of them’s being an extrovert. You know, if you’re sociable and you’re always out meeting lots
of people then more opportunities are likely to come your way.” The gun cracked. The horses bolted, and then frantically pulled back in a messy scattering of colours, legs and reins. A false start. “Mmm. And?” I asked. “And what?” Angi replied. “And what are the other two things that make you lucky?”
“After all, this was Astral Angi talking; maybe she had some magic, astrological advice that could change my life for the better. Or at least win me £50” “Reappraising incidents. What would you call that? When negative things happen but you just look at them as if they’re positive. You make them appear positive.” “Like when I asked Julie Burchill about being fired from The Times and she told me she’d just got bored of it. And then she called me up a few weeks later to say that, yes, she probably had been fired actually,” I offered. “Yes, like that. What would you call that? Optimism, I guess,” she added, enigmatically. “Right. OK,” I responded, thoughtfully. The horses fidgeted for a bit. Back and forth to the starting line, eyes bulging and feet twitching with testosterone, waiting for the race to start. “And what’s the third one then?” I asked. “Oh, I don’t know,” said Angi, then, after a pause added: “Sagittarians are really lucky.” “Oh,” I said. “I’m a Taurus.” The gun went off for the second time, and I waited for the inevitable.
Lucky star Brighton-based Lucky Jim’s first album is re-released If you missed the Brighton leg of Lucky Jim’s tour, then panic ye not. His brilliant first album, set to be a modern classic, Our Troubles End Tonight is out now for your delectation and delight. Jim, aka Gordon Grahame, and the bloke whose song, ‘You're Lovely To Me’ is on the Kingsmill ad, is destined to be one of the big stars of 2007. Referencing influences as eclectic as Neil Young, Lee Hazelwood, Serge Gainsbourg and Bob Dylan, his album, originally released in 2004 to great critical acclaim, has just been repackaged and re-released. This time round it includes three additional new bonus tracks – ‘Sail On’, ‘I Won't Ask For More’, and an alternative cut of ‘You’re Lovely To Me’. Lucky Jim? Lucky us.
Comments, queries and general chitchat can be sent to: katie@thelatest.co.uk
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THE RHYME
Eminemmylou The UK’s first and only rap and spoken-word column. This week featuring Steve Baggs Vegetables and poets unite! This week's poet wants to be carrot-like Sprouting forth verse, but onionated, not parrot-like Lend him your cauliflowers, and fight for a greens life
I’d rather be a carrot than a car Our allotment has had its lot Where once our vegetables lay They’re building a dual cabbage-way We’ve been given the chard shoulder Told to get out of the sloe lane Smashed up our cold frame Bulldozed the beetroots, concreted over the carrots Soiled our soil conditioning To sow a central reservation So I took some vegetable retribution Set up a root crop road block For the motorists to take stock.
Send rhymes and a pic to: eminemmylou@thelatest.co.uk
The backlash starts here Chris Pacey has a bad time with Brighton’s door staff Never before have I felt so simultaneously ashamed and angry. And somehow, strangely macho. After all, it seemed that I had just been turned away from a nightclub for being too threatening and manly. I was part of a small group of three sober, well-presented men, who had spent their walk to the club entrance chatting quietly. Clearly, we were not to be trusted. The ape-like behemoths that guard the archways of the seafront are there to ensure that everyone can enjoy themselves in safety, protected from any potential lager-louts, drug-dealers or trouble-makers. In practise, they are drunk with power and enforce a litany of contradictory rules. Perhaps most galling are the lies rolled out in defence of their frequently baffling decisions. On one particular night, we were initially informed that the club was full to capacity. We politely asked why another group were being let in without so much as half an eyelid being batted; we were told, rather curtly, to mind our own business. But with more four letter words. On other occasions, we have been asked to present ID. My friends and I are all approaching 30 and very few of us have driving licences – this is Brighton, after all, and driving is usually a luxury reserved for the
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EMOTIONS
Dani’s diary Dani wrestles with the anxieties conjured up by the smell of summer and looks for some motivation I’ve tried over the past few weeks to write about anything but my new found best friend, Anxiety. But this week I’m gonna have to just a little. A lot of my memories are based around smells, I can’t use Dove deodorant because that was what I was using when I was with my first boyfriend, I love the smell of fried food in the morning because it reminds me of Christmas Day. And most recently, I have become wary of the smell of summer, because last summer that smell accompanied me through the worst time of my life. As the weather improves, I wake up each morning unsure of whether I’m better or not, unsure if this is still last summer or today. And those nightmarish few seconds can set me up on the wrong foot for the rest of the day. Because for some reason, although I know it’s stupid, I am worried that I will have a really bad day because the air smells the way it did when I had my worst days. How silly is that? I’m trying really hard to keep my mind occupied so I don’t think too much, because when I get five minutes to think I start thinking the wrong things and that’s it. I haven’t washed my hair in a week because spending that extra few minutes in the shower with nothing to concentrate on is a bit too much. Writing this, I’m laughing at myself because I realise how ridiculous it sounds and I can’t believe it’s happening to me! But it is and I have to accept it and move on.
“I wake up unsure of whether I’m better or not, unsure if this is still last summer or today” Well, I’m 20 now, It doesn’t really mean anything does it? Just means I’m one year closer to being a fully fledged grown up. Not that I know what age a grown up is, I just know I’m not one yet. I’m not ready to start a regular job for regular money and spend Fridays at the pub and do DIY on Sundays. But on the other hand, I kind of am. You only live once, and I would want to live that once to the full, but I don’t know how to do that. Not with everything else that’s going on, it feels like I’m existing not living and there is a big difference. I’ve had it too easy, I expect the next big thing to just drop in my lap and I have no motivation to go out there and get it. That’s the problem, no motivation. It has to be the problem. For about two days I decided I suffered with SAD because it’s easier to have an illness with a proper name and a description you can understand. No motivation is my next one, and after that it will be something else, because I’m not satisfied with having a problem I can’t cure, control or understand. With my last few words, I want to say a big thank you to everyone who has been so supportive to me. Strangers, friends and relatives, you have all helped me more than you will ever know. masochistic or the wealthy. Since the odds of us impulsively booking a charter flight to Lanzarote on a Friday night out are slim to none, we do not often have our passports in tow, for much the same reason that we do not carry suitcases about in Tesco’s. Given that I haven’t had my age called into question since a week before my 18th birthday, I simply cannot believe that I don’t look old enough – which begs the question: why do they need to see ID at all? They think: “This person carries a photograph of themselves on an official-looking document. Ergo, they are unequivocally neither criminal, nor trouble-maker. It is selfevident this person has never drunk to excess, taken drugs or started a fight.”
“Most galling are the lies rolled out in defence of their frequently baffling decisions” Of course, my question is rhetorical. ID is requested in order to make your life difficult to the maximum extent permissible under law, should the whim take hold. On another such night, bombarded by torrential rain, a friend of mine was sans ID. But he knew a couple of members of staff, so all we needed was for the bouncers to summon them – what could go wrong? Apparently, “Names are for tombstones, mate, not for dropping”. It would have been magnificent to sneer something dignified and cutting. However, sardonic wit doesn’t have quite the same effect when delivered by a drowned rat. And anyway, they remained dry throughout. Bastards.
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AROUNDTOWN
sponsored by
Celebcity with Jo Brooks
Building Britain David Dimbleby talks architecture
Last week, private chef to the stars, Michael Harwood, invited Brighton’s great and good to a very special launch party for his new catering service, Juniper. Michael has teamed up with another of the city’s finest caterers, Oliver Hyde, to launch the new service, which looks set to raise the bar for catering in the South East. In his long and illustrious career, Michael has cooked for a variety of famous faces all over the world, from serving canapés at Trump Tower to a moonlit dinner for eight on a super-yacht in the Med. If you’ve got a party coming up and you fancy a bit of all-star celebrity catering, just visit the website at www.junipercatering.com
Kooks fill up
Architecture buffs of Brighton and Hove take note: I hear that acclaimed BBC TV commentator David Dimbleby is coming to town later on this month to promote his new series How We Built Britain. The series, which also has an accompanying book, is a fascinating examination of the nation’s architectural heritage and gives a dramatic insight into the extraordinary buildings that have defined this country. Mr Dimbleby will be giving a talk at the Corn Exchange on 25 May to illustrate what is sure to be a ground-breaking programme. And if that whets your appetite for all things architectural, don’t forget that next month sees the welcome return of Architecture Week South East, a week-long celebration of the best of British architecture, featuring events, exhibition and discussion during 15-24 June. This year’s theme is Different Perspectives, whether this be the ways in which different people perceive a building, or looking at places which are usually hidden or ‘invisible’. For more information on everything that is happening during this year’s Architecture Week South East, you can visit the website at www.architectureweek.org.uk
Frank’s signing I hear that one-time WBC Heavyweight Champion Frank Bruno recently made a star appearance at sports memorabilia store Football Bananas in The Lanes. The former fighter, who is as famous for his trademark laugh and catchphrase “Know what I mean, Harry?” as he is for his legendary fights in the ring, was at the store signing boxing gloves and photographs for fans. Apparently, Big Frank stayed at the shop for three hours, and – according to staff – was very jovial and articulate. And I have good news for fans who missed the appearance: a signed pair of gloves are on sale in Football Bananas for £50. Visit www.footballbananas.com for details.
Last month, uber-cool rock group The Kooks, were spotted enjoying roast lamb all round at North Laine pub, The Eagle. The band are proof that no matter how rock’n’roll you are, there’s still always room for a good oldfashioned roast dinner. The Brighton-based four-piece were playing a special hometown gig at the Concorde 2 that very evening, and the boys stopped by the pub to fill their boots with some of the best roast dinner available in Brighton.
Straight outta Brighton Another hot band of the moment, Kaiser Chiefs, recently awarded a Brighton resident the star role in their new video ‘Everything Is Average Nowadays’. William Cripps of city casting agency Fresh Agents was asked to play a young Eminem (the real Slim Shady is pictured below) in the video, which will be released next month.
Comedy celebrity anagram of the week: Eminem, the Real Slim Shady = “Elementary, idle mish-mash”
Corrie star’s seaside trip Spotted! Corrie star Owen Aaronovitch, embarking on a trip with his wife and kids up at Brighton Station. You may remember that the actor played pathological liar John Lindsay in the late 90s, when he wooed Deirdre Barlow with tales of his life as an airline pilot, when he actually worked at the Tie Rack stand at Manchester Airport!
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Posh party food
Jo Brooks is director of Brighton-based PR company JBPR Ltd, 01273 622555 www.jb-pr.com
To comment on any of these stories or send in any news stories email editorial@thelatest.co.uk
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COMPETITIONSXWORD
In it to win it
latestcrossword
solutions on page 40
Get your hands on these great giveaways! Deep Water – DVD We have three copies of the poignant documentary Deep Water to give away. This all-new DVD tells the true-life story of Donald Crowhurst, following his mission to become the fastest person to sail alone around the world non-stop in the first ever Sunday Times Golden Globe boat race. Crowhurst experiences depression and loneliness on his journey and bad judgement soon results in desperate measures. To be in with a chance of winning just tell us: What was the name of the boat race Donald Crowhurst was participating in?
1900 – DVD Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment celebrates the 30th anniversary of 1900, released on DVD for the first time on 30 April. The classic masterpiece from award-winning Italian director Bernardo Bertolucci stars Robert De Niro, Gérard Depardieu and Donald Sutherland and tells an epic story of friendship and betrayal. We have three copies of this stunning DVD collectors’ edition to give away. To win, answer the following question: Actor Gérard Depardieu hails from which country?
Deep Fear – Book Deep Fear is the last instalment in the fantastic Pure Dead series. A final battle between good and evil will take place as the forces of evil converge on StregaSchloss. The wild and the weird Strega-Borgias must fight back but there are just too many distractions in the form of a missing toddler-witch and a house full of wolves! To be in with a chance of winning one of two copies, tell us: Deep Fear is the hilarious finale to which series of books?
3000 Miles – DVD 3000 Miles... Of Pure Hell Fanfare is the Jackass tour of the world. Join Tony Hawk, Bam Margera and co as they travel 3000 miles from London to the Playboy Mansion in LA. With skating stunts, fast cars and Playboy Bunnies, all in the spirit of Gumball! To be in with a chance of winning one of three copies, answer this question: What sport is Tony Hawk most associated with?
To Have And To Hold – DVD A tense thriller, directed by John Hillcoat (The Proposition), about a man who lost his wife in the jungles of Papua New Guinea. Returning a few years later with new love Kate, it soon becomes apparent that there’s more to the death of Jack’s first wife than was first thought... Entrants must be aged 18 or over. To be in with a chance to win one of three copies, just tell us: What other film is director John Hillcoat well known for?
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ACROSS
3 Farms torn to bits by change (9) 7 Out of sorts? Take most of the tablets (3) 8 He has sale arrangement with senior tenant (11) 10 Immature tree causes a foot complaint (5) 11 Remove upright from Detective Inspector's mum, a little saint (7) 13 Refer to everyone improperly owed (6) 14 Obstruct the little devil - Sir Anthony Short is behind (6) 17 Intercede and reflect upon losing the square (7) 19 Eminent man absent (5) 20 Nothing (a mathematical term) disturbs medium from application of the mind (11) 22 The lot is worth a couple of pounds (3) 23 Bent spoons belong to Russian with financial backing (9)
1 Food producer makes room for one genuine emergency gadget (4,5) 2 The joker's annual (3,5,3) 3 Skilled man absorbs moisture (7) 4 Woman has inside information on business programme (6) 5 Northerners get beds from the south (5) 6 See most of Jane rising from the grass (3) 9 Call Act I "Die of logic" (11) 12 Factory for tyre parts? (9) 15 Before getting old, the fellow coped (7) 16 Merchant beginners need forecaster around (6) 18 Man interferes with animal remains (5) 21 Juice for the simpleton (3)
3 Charitable person (9) 7 Single (3) 8 Cultural revival (11) 10 Run away (5) 11 Went in (7) 13 Sleeve band (6) 14 Get back (6) 17 Somerset place (7) 19 River (5) 20 Form advance notion (11) 22 Star sign (3) 23 One going down (9).
DOWN 1 Domestic (9) 2 Act (11) 3 Genuine (7) 4 Unmarried woman (6) 5 Receive stolen goods (5) 6 Part of circle (3) 9 In story form (11) 12 Weed (9) 15 Sooner (7) 16 Tracked down (6) 18 Valuable find (5) 21 Fish eggs (3)
The Summoning – Book The Summoning is the second title from E E Richardson, telling the story of four friends who summon a malicious spirit intent on revenge after being imprisoned in an ancient book. Bound to the four friends, the spirit will possess one of them in order to gain strength, and the four must banish this evil from the world. But how can they, when they don’t know who to trust? Suitable for ages 12+, we have two copies to give away. Just tell us: What was the title of E E Richardson’s debut novel?
Black Book – DVD Director Paul Verhoeven (Basic Instinct, Total Recall) presents an epic and moving tale set in the last months of the Second World War. Following a Jewish refugee who escapes to Holland, this is a sexy thriller based around double dealings and betrayal, set against the cold backdrop of war. Entrants must be aged 15 or over. To be in with a chance to win one of three copies tell us: What year marked the end of the Second World War?
To be in with a chance of winning, email competitions@thelatest.co.uk with the title of the prize you wish to win in the subject box . Alternatively, write to us at the address at the front of the magazine. Don’t forget to leave your name, contact address and number. (Closing date for entries is 15 May)
For coverage in this magazine email editorial@thelatest.co.uk
To advertise call Kate on 01273 818150
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4/25/07
3:29 PM
Page 2
ONLY JOKING! Which sexy singer is very keen her long-term boyfriend doesn’t find out about the fling she had with a married man? Aghhhh! Bliiiiiiiiiiiiiiimeeeeeeey! Which so-called ‘ladies’ man’ is very friendly indeed with a barman at notorious gay nightspot Revenge? This housewives’ favourite has been seen leaving his chum’s flat in the wee small hours. Wahhhhhhhhhhhh! Oooof! Christ! This snow is cold!
Bare cheek Brian Mitchell and Joseph Nixon’s thoroughly scurrilous Brighton column
In & Out IN • Operation Good Guys • Simnel cake • Referring to Prince as ‘the purple pain of pop’ • Cannon and Ball’s Casino • Dentrophilia • Blimey
OUT • Every Second Counts • Britvic 55 • The Sadducees • Not being able to take Picnic At Hanging Rock entirely seriously, despite its beautifully realised dreamlike aura and subtle dissection of the themes of colonialism and adolescent female sexuality, because it’s got Mrs Mangel in it • Yeast
With John Berryman
Spotted
Staggering along some great dead & unclean street in England’s Brighton, the vile large glare of the tumorous sun & the stench of subtle forgotten fornications. O hell! I muttered to myself, but that Lowell & Randall & Sylvia could have seen this accursed flesh-wrapped rhapsody. but O! having not eaten breakfast & having (I think) missed lunch I made my way to some Preston St eatery slavering with mean ruined happiness, & there saw Ian Lavender.
Wicked whispers With Eddie ‘The Eagle’ Edwards Hi gossip fans! You know, when I’m not coming 27th in the ski jump at the Olympics, I like to keep my eyes peeled for what Brighton celebs are up to that they’d rather we didn’t know about. So I’ll let you in on a few secrets, while hurtling down a ski slope at 150 miles per hour… Which radio presenter keeps sneaking off to the toilet whenever a track’s playing for an activity unconnected with usual toilet activities? He’s on his last warning, or he’ll be receiving his marching (powder) orders. Wooooooooooooooooooooooo!
Which actress is terrified that an ‘art film’ she made at the beginning of her career will come back to haunt her? Apparently the movie contains an unusual performance with a donkey, of the sort you wouldn’t expect to find on Animal Hospital. Chriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiist! Which sports star is playing away from home in more than one way (in the sense that in addition to playing games at other teams’ stadia, he’s also committing adultery)? If his missus finds out he’d better watch out for his tackle! Wooooooh! Aaaaaaghhh! I think I’ve broken my leg. Well I’d best be off now to have this leg put in plaster and make an advert for double glazing or something. See you soon for more top celebrity gossip!
Hove factually Some more facts you might not know about fantabulous Hove. 1. Hove has its own flag, which is bright purple with a picture of former Don't Wait Up actor Tony Britten embroidered on it in gold braid, and the motto ‘Everywhere Other Than Hove Sucks’. 2. When he retired, Lolita author Vladimir Nabokov moved to Sackville Road, where he opened a bicycle repair shop. 3. Rather than jokes, Hove Christmas crackers include sexually explicit insults and threats of violence. 4. In 2006 My Chemical Romance lead singer Gerard Way was awarded the freedom of Hove. Previous recipients of this honour have included Ken Hom, Bob Carolgees, Idi Amin, Richard Digance, and David ‘Kid’ Jensen. 5. A little-known Hove delicacy is Bongle Cake, which is made from flour, eggs, milk, vanilla essence, glace cherries and Dave Lee Travis.
STARS
Astral Angi ★ Your week ahead ★
Buy the CD Bardsley’s, country music with c-hip s-hop beats at Bardsley’s and Borders NOW!
BARDSLEY’S
CASABLANCA FISH N CHIPS 22/23/23A BAKER ST, BRIGHTON BN1 4JN
01273 681256
ARIES (MAR 21–APR 20)
CANCER (JUNE 22–JULY 22)
LIBRA (SEP 23–OCT 22)
CAPRICORN (DEC 21–JAN 19)
Hi Aries, a year is a leap year if it is divisible by four, unless it is divisible by 100 and not 400. Got it? So work out whether next year is a leap year or not and let Roy at Bardsley’s know.
Marriage is three parts love and affection, seven parts endurance and forgiveness, four parts a cup of tea and nice biscuits. Cancerians are made to be wed.
Your home is your larger body. It grows in the sun and sleeps in stillness, and dreams of leaving the hubbub of the city for grove or hilltop. The planets are saying a tidy-up is on the cards.
Do as you would be done by! Or do as others would like you to do? Or do whatever pops into your head at the time? Or do nothing? That, I’m sure you’ll agree, is the question.
TAURUS (APR 21–MAY 21)
LEO (JULY 23–AUG 22)
SCORPIO (OCT 23–NOV 21)
AQUARIUS (JAN 20–FEB 19)
The heart or love line is the top line on your palm – a curved heart line means you are sensitive, a straight one shows directness, a wiggly one means you’re really a Gemini.
When you look at the person you love, the following parts of the brain are activated: the anterior cingulate, the medial insular, the putamen and caudate nucleus.
Just to be is a blessing Scorpio. To walk to Bardsley’s in Baker Street, to sit down and have the fresh platter with chips and champagne wine is a blessing and a half.
People with long hair want short hair and people with short hair want long hair. Most other star signs want to be Aquarians. Only Aquarians are relatively content.
GEMINI (MAY 22–JUNE 21)
VIRGO (AUG 23–SEP 22)
SAGITTARIUS (NOV 22–DEC 20)
PISCES (FEB 20–MAR 20)
There are 10,000 taste buds in the human gob and the average life span of a human taste bud is seven to ten days. As a wise man once said: “Not a lot of people know that Gemini.”
“…the problems of three little people don’t amount to a hill of beans in this crazy world. Now, here’s looking at you, Virgo.” Name that film for some free chips at Bardsley’s.
The vital centre of your body is the ‘hara’ from which chi flows. The tai chi is the place of profound unity. Does it reside at the chip emporium in Baker Street?
Remember to vote Pisces. Not vote Pisces, but vote, Pisces. On second thoughts, voting Pisces might not be such a bad idea. Sensitivity and kindness all round.
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To talk to Astral Angi please email angi@thelatest.co.uk
4/26/07
2:51 PM
Page 3
STAND-UP COMEDY
A laughing matter Victoria Nangle’s got festival fever as she prepares to see and be seen
It’s madness I tell you – utter madness! With so much to see and so little time to do it, I even find that I’m seeing three shows in one day one after t’other at the same venue. Yes, the festival has started and it’s time to grab it around the neck – gently – and go see those brilliant shows you carefully selected when the brochures first came out. That and the occasional random impulse buy on the night, snapping up tickets to quality shows that haven’t quite yet sold out, giving us the chance to get our greasy mits on those last few nuggets of golden tickets. It’s like living in Christmas-town for a month with a wide variety of shows catering to all tastes and flavours. Including milkshake. What’s more, not only am I dashing around from pillar to post watching great shows, I’ve actually been booked to appear in a couple too. Taking the new trend of interactivity that extra step off the page, for the first time I’ll get the feel of the festival from the inside and out. In the nicest and least gross possible way.
“Not only am I dashing around watching great shows, I’ve actually been booked to appear in a couple too” I’m really looking forward to it actually. Apart from the week of sleep we’ll all need as June hits us and the festival disperses, this is going to be the best and most quality crammed month of new jewels and established treasures there’s been for quite some time. Meeting new performers, the street acts spilling over from coffee shops and bars onto the seafront, variety and new styles waiting to be gotcha’d – last year’s was the brilliant comic mime of Gamarjobat, back again with a new show at Komedia. Can’t wait to see that. Who knows where this years’ bolt-from-the-blue genius will come from. Plus, I’m performing in it! I know I said that before, but it’s still quite freaky knowledge considering that this time last year the last performing I’d done had been at school with a band behind me, more years ago than I’d care to mention. Or let anyone else mention. Now it’s just me, the mic and hopefully a few laughs – at or with me, I’m not bothered so long as you laugh. And I’m playing in a late show. All drunken heckling and trembling knees with thoughts of the next day’s work long gone as soon as I get off stage and neck that post-gig pint... With a sandwich, as my pragmatic colleague pointed out. So, on your marks, get set... and get ready to dive into festival fever. It’ll spill over into your world as soon as look at you, so you may as well embrace it. Either that or go away on holiday yourself for a month. It’d be a shame though. How often do you get the chance to see the best of what’s out there right at your doorstep? Exactly.
☺
Stand-up wisdom 39: “I’m not a misogynist. I respect women, I’m just not afraid of them.” Reginald D Hunter
image
Individual Images for Individual People
catcher T i m R i c h a r d s o n Freelance Photographer 01273 881832 07977 140002 www.image-catcher.co.uk tim.richardson@image-catcher.co.uk 32a Carlisle Road, Hove, East Sussex BN3 4FS
PETS
Marc the vet Paul O’Grady Show’s Marc Abraham says make a frog a friend and create a pond
Spring is most definitely in the air – and in the water too! Amphibians are jumping at the chance to get hot under the collar with their cold-blooded mates, but it’s not always plain sailing. As the weather warms up, and after a particularly wet and mild winter, ponds and even puddles are becoming hives of activity as frogs, toads and newts congregate to produce spawn – their next generation.
Photo: Paul Stevens
013_LS319_stand-up/vets
“Ponds and puddles are becoming hives of activity as frogs, toads and newts congregate” Many nature-filled childhoods (mine included) are punctuated annually with the fascination of both frogspawn and tadpoles, which seem to be produced in incredible quantities. But after birds, fish, and even foxes have eaten their fill, only a handful of tadpoles will make it to adulthood. Sussex Wildlife Trust are asking you to help maximise their chances of survival by adopting one or more of these four key points to ensure a healthy, thriving population of amphibians in your garden or green space. Why not create your own wildlife pond? More than 75 per cent of ponds were lost during the last century. The ideal pond to attract frogs, toads and newts should have a deep section (around 1m) in which they can hibernate and a larger shallow area of water (less than 20cm deep) in which the creatures can spawn. However, don’t put fish in your pond! Goldfish in particular will quickly decimate tadpoles and frogspawn, and even tiny sticklebacks are likely to prevent newts from breeding. If you want a healthy population of amphibians, forget fish. Only use native plant species. There are lots of suitable wetland plants you can buy at garden centres to help stock your pond. Particular favourites for breeding amphibians include water crowfoot, water starwort, water forget-me-not and water mint. Please avoid non-native species as they are unlikely to be beneficial to wildlife and, in some cases, take over ponds completely, leaving them choked-up and lifeless. Particular species to avoid include New Zealand pygmy weed, floating pennywort and water fern. And finally, never move spawn, tadpoles or wetland plants between ponds. You may be transferring invasive aquatic plant species, or spreading amphibian diseases such as red-leg virus, which can wipe out entire frog populations. For information about ponds and how to care for the wild creatures that rely on them for survival, call Laura on Sussex Wildlife Trust’s information hotline, WildCall 01273 494777. Thanks to Sussex Wildlife Trust for helping me compile this column.
Any comments for Marc email editorial@thelatest.co.uk 12,000 students attend the University of Sussex. The only way to reach these potential clients is through the University of Sussex Students’ Union. The badger is the Students’ Union’s tabloid newspaper, published every Thursday and read by 84% of students*. The pulse, our termly magazine, has been awarded the best UK Student Magazine twice by The Guardian and Independent newspapers. To advertise in either publication, phone the USSU marketing team on 01273 678151 or email ussu-marketing@sussex.ac.uk * Student Lifestyle Questionnaire 2002
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014_015_LS319_udderbelly
4/27/07
9:24 AM
Page 2
UDDERBELLY
Plucking hell Some strings to write home about with Pluck – Musical Arson! They’ve played to packed-out audiences in three continents, won four international awards, and even interviewed the President of Slovenia in a boxing ring. Really. Not bad for a bunch of classical musos. Pluck come from classical music backgrounds, but came together in 2002 wanting to do something different with their skills. Those familiar with the piano playing skills of Les Dawson will know it takes real talent to take hold of music and make it funny, and this is what Pluck are consummate experts at. Since their inaugural concert at Ronnie Scott’s, they’ve gone on to play the Adelaide and Edinburgh Fringe festivals, winning the coveted ‘Spirit Of The Fringe Award’ and the alternative to the Perrier comedy awards, the ‘Tap Water’ awards. Last year they teamed up with comedy directing wizard Cal McCrystal (the genius behind Peepolykus and Spymonkey’s Cooped from Brighton Festival 2006). Pluck are violinist Adrian Garratt, cellist Sian Kadifachi and violist Jon Regan (a violist being a necessity in a set up like this, being as they’re the butt of jokes in musician circles – the Skoda of the music world). They’ve got four Edinburgh Fringe Festivals under their belt, but if you think playing arts festivals is a bit safe, these guys have also played a football stadium packed with 8,000 supporters. UdderBELLY, Old Steine, 6 and 7 May, 3.15pm £10/£8 Ticket office 01273 709 709 or see www.udderbelly.co.uk
French exchange Oddball musical fun and games in Priorité à Gauche – Remastered Attention, tout le monde! Priorité à Gauche, le groupe superbe de la France, est dans la maison, maintenant, ecoutez et repeatez, d’accord? Attention, all the world. Priorité à Gauche, France’s supergroup, are ‘in the house’, so listen and repeat after me, OK? Priorité à Gauche are Jean-François and Didier – two French rock, rap, pop and roll stars who have wowed British audiences with their unique sound. This is a French exchange like you have never seen before. Whether rapping about the merits of British culture or getting back to their roots with just a couple of guitars, Priorité à Gauche are super-cool.
Here’s a sample of one of their hits, ‘Bonjour’: I don’t wear a string of onions when I ride my bike / We’re not always blockading, we’re not always on strike / Je n’ai pas d’accordéon je ne porte pas de béret / I wash my hair and have a bath almost every day From the success of their first album, Je Ne Suis Pas Un Numero, Je Suis Français (‘I Am Not A Number, I Am French’), a political commentary on living in contemporary France, to performing at NME’s Brat Awards, the ‘Gauche are well and truly on the UK’s radar. Vive La France! UdderBELLY, Old Steine. 5 May, 9pm, £12/£10 Ticket office 01273 709 709 or see www.udderbelly.co.uk
Fallen angel Bill Hicks – Slight Return: sardonic wit from beyond the grave Bill Hicks is one of those comedians who has inspired almost God-like worship in his fans. Now sadly no longer with us, Hicks aficionados guard his legacy with great passion, so the premise of this show sounds almost doomed to failure – bringing back one of the greatest loved, most admired acerbic geniuses of comedy from the grave to hear what he would make of the world we live in. It shouldn’t work, and yet it does. Actor Chas Early re-creates
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Hicks’ stage-persona with all his mannerisms and motor-mouth delivery, and gives him material that fits perfectly. He laid into Bush Senior plenty when he was alive – now he can get his teeth into Junior, plus there’s a wealth of material in the war on terror, the internet, and even Coldplay and Dido get a good bashing. UdderBELLY, Old Steine, 5-7 May, 7pm £12/£10 Ticket office 01273 709 709 or see www.udderbelly.co.uk
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4/27/07
9:35 AM
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UDDERBELLY
A blaze of contradictions Rants and laughs with Jim Jeffries – The Second Coming Jim Jeffries is many things – he’s worked as a presenter for a porn TV channel and is soon to appear on the new satirical news quiz News Knight With Trevor MacDonald. He’s been called ‘a man untouched by political correctness’ and yet he became a poster boy for free speech after the leader of the Christian Voice organisation prevented him from appearing on the BBC’s Heaven & Earth Show. Despite his aggressive stage persona, he’s quietly spoken in real life and when challenged in the heat of one of his on-stage rants, the man is the first to admit when he’s being (in his words) ‘a bit of a prick’. Jeffries has been earning rave reviews for his show The Second Coming, which tackles the subjects other comedians dare not touch. It’s a rare thing to see a comic who has no taboos, moving from sex, drugs and disability into misplaced patriotism, terrorism, and that latest big nono, religion. Let’s face it, any comic who annoys Christian Voice (who branded Jeffries ‘sick and repellent’) is definitely worth checking out. UdderBELLY, Old Steine, 14 May 9pm, £10/£8 Ticket office 01273 709 709 or see www.udderbelly.co.uk
Double trouble Greedy and The Pros From Dover in a comedy double bill Take two sketch shows into the shower? Yes, I will thank you. While not wanting to draw your attention to the prudent, purseclenching value-for-money-ness of this double bill, after all this isn’t the comedy equivalent of Poundstretcher we’re talking about here, this is an excellent opportunity to see the best of these two fine comedy sketch groups. The Pros From Dover are Phil Whelans, Neil Cole and Richard Glover, who between them have ratcheted up appearances on Brasseye, Saturday Night Live, The Jack Doherty Show and BBC1’s Stand Up Show. Their writing credits are equally impressive (Joan Rivers, 2DTV and The 11 O’Clock Show) and Phil Whelans is the director behind last year’s Perrier Comedy Award-winning show, Phil Nichol’s The Naked Racist. Together they have created a sort of comedy supergroup, known for their punchy sketches. Their monthly residency at London’s Albany venue is a draw for some of the UK’s top comedy
Meet the Johnsons Years of hard work have finally paid off with a TV series but you can catch The Ornate Johnsons’ live show at the UdderBELLY When asked how he would describe sketch group The Ornate Johnsons, lead writer and head honcho Brian Mitchell replies in one word:“Old.” Founder member Dave Mounfield clarifies this: “We’ve been doing it for years. We started back in 1992 – when we were at Sussex University. Sketch comedy was deeply unfashionable back then – everything was stand up. I suppose we’re like a pop group who just keep plugging away in the hope that one day there’d be a seismic shift in taste – comedy’s Pulp, if you will.” That shift eventually occurred last May when The Johnsons, who have been compared to Not The Nine O’Clock News and The Two Ronnies, managed to completely sell out London’s prestigious Soho Theatre, garnering rave reviews and celebrity fans in the process. They also scooped this very magazine’s award for best comedy in the Brighton Festival, pipping favourites Spy Monkey and Count Arthur Strong at the post. “It’s weird,” agrees Laurence Relton. “Basically, we’ve been going for 15 years, on and off – so it’s strange to suddenly have success like this.” Two years ago, Laurence was a corporate lawyer at a London firm , until he decided to throw it all in for a life of greasepaint and laughter.
“I was sitting in the dentist’s chair, and I suddenly realised having my teeth pulled was preferable to my job,” says Laurence, “so I just resigned and thought, well, I might as well do something I enjoy. You only get one life after all.” Unlike Laurence, the rest of the OJs are seasoned performers – Brian has worked on BBC TV’s Live And Kicking, and has written for both Basil Brush and Jerry Sadowitz; Dave has also worked for Sadowitz, as well as Count Arthur Strong; Glen Richardson has enjoyed a long career as a musical parodist and songwriter, appearing on Radio 4’s The Day The Music Died; while Clea Smith has won many awards and plaudits for her stage roles. But what makes the Johnsons stand out from other sketch groups? “We’re about fun, really,” says Clea. “Too many sketch shows these days seem to be just people sitting in offices or pubs talking, but we
Greedy
talent who often pitch up for cameo performances. They’re destined for big things, so catch them while you can. Greedy, a group whose surreal imagination invites comparisons with Big Train, are pretty much the perfect comedy sketch group. Well-written sketches? Check. Great punchlines? Check. Face-bending, rubberlimbed physical comedy? Check. Utter nonsense, joyful silliness and guaranteed laughs? Check. You get the picture. If you want to see an Elizabethan-style dance off, a politically incorrect disembodied head and the truth behind Boudicca’s rousing launch into battle (and who wouldn’t?) then get along to the UdderBELLY. UdderBELLY, Old Steine, 15 May, 7pm, £10/£8 Ticket office 01273 709 709 or see www.udderbelly.co.uk
like to do big performances, and use visual gags and song and dance numbers. At one point in the show we even do a five minute opera based on Only Fools And Horses.” Glen agrees: “I think comedy takes itself far too seriously these days – everyone’s trying to be like Larry David and do these subtle semiimprovised character pieces that are meant to reflect real life – but we’re not like that. My own big number in the show is ‘Soft Rock News’ – a news report done as a Jim Steinman/Meat Loaf song – that doesn’t reflect anyone’s life. And it’s all the better for it.” So successful have the ’Johnsons been of late that they have their own half-hour show on BBC4, going out on 15 May, as part of the channel’s Edwardian season – a broadly humourous take on life in the original ‘noughties’. The show co-stars Perrier nominee and long time OJs collaborator Joanna Neary. They are also presently touring the country. So why are they called The Ornate Johnsons? “The answer to this is long, but unfortunately not very interesting,” says Brian. “Years ago my writing partner Joseph and I wrote a Moss Hart and George S. Kaufman-esque play called How To Get Lucky. In the play, a character called Ornate Johnson is alluded to (we thought this an apposite moniker for an American presidential candidate of the 1920s) and, looking for a name for the group, we chose this pretty much at random. We are not ornate. Of course, in the US, ‘johnson’ means ‘penis’, so we are very unlikely to break the States.” And what, I ask Brian, distinguishes the ’Johnsons from the myriad other sketch groups floating around? “None of us went to Oxbridge and we have a combined age of 183. We really are very old.” UdderBELLY, Old Steine, 12 and 26 May, 5pm, £10/£8. Ticket office 01273 709 709 or see www.udderbelly.co.uk latest 7 15
016_Life&Death fest ad
4/25/07
3:22 PM
Page 1
‘DESTINED FOR THE WEST END’ ABSOLUTE BRIGHTON ‘A MASTERPIECE’ METRO ‘UNMISSABLE’ EDINBURGH GUIDE ‘A MONUMENTAL WORK’ THE ARGUS
AN ASTONISHING MUSICAL ABOUT DARFUR & AUSCHWITZ
with the rainbow chorus and members of brighton youth orchestra conducted by dominic nunns STARRING KERRI MCLEAN with
ANGI MARIANI
(EMINEMMYLOU)
& GUY PICOT (HOLBY CITY & FOOTBALLERS’ WIVES WRITER)
22ND – 27TH MAY 7PM £10 (£6) THE UDDERBELLY BOX OFFICE 01273 709709 www.udderbelly.co.uk
www.lifeanddeath.org
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4/26/07
6:34 PM
Page 3
BRIGHTON FESTIVAL
Get festive Five, four, three, two, one… it’s Brighton Festival time and the fun starts here with a word from festival chief executive Nick Dodds and festival producer Jane McMorrow
Nick Dodds
Jane McMorrow
Chief executive
Festival producer
“Brighton Festival’s mission is to be a pioneer of creative performance and to make the city a truly national cultural hub. This year, Jane McMorrow and the festival team have really broken fresh ground in presenting performances in new ways and attracting artists and audiences to our wonderful city. Not content with our great concert halls, opera houses and theatres we are presenting shows in a police cell, a hotel carpark and outside the railway station! And just so us residents don’t keep all the fun to ourselves we have signed a new national media partnership with The Guardian and asked Southern Railway to organise a new Festival Night Train to whizz our London friends back to the capital after the show. “My top tips for this year? Les Ballets C. de la B.’s brilliant dancers/acrobats performing to sublime baroque music from a live string quartet in the Corn Exchange. Czech National Symphony Orchestra conducted by the great Libor Pesek with our own Brighton Festival Chorus and young violin prodigy Chloe Hanslip performing, give an extraordinarily special programme in the Concert Hall. The Macedonian gypsy wedding band, Kocani Orkestar, paired with A Hawk And A Hacksaw et al, will be the gig of the festival – be there and you can bore your friends all year by telling them what they missed!”
“You want to know the real secret behind why Brighton Festival carries on getting better? We’d love to pretend it’s all down to us – that we’re a brilliant, risk-taking production team, who choose art that’s at the cutting edge. The truth is, you can only put on art when it has an audience. The reason why the festival has grown at such a rate – both in quality and in the size of the crowds that flock to it – is largely down to the type of people who live in Brighton and Hove. The thing about Brighton’s audiences is that they’re like nowhere else. People here like to be challenged; they love to see work that is out of the ordinary. When we’re programming new work we need to know we can take risks. And the glorious thing about Brighton is that we can. “Don’t believe it when you hear that everything is sold out. There are still lots of shows you can get tickets for and join in the fun. Like Futurology – A Global Review, which opened to great acclaim last week in Glasgow. The Scotsman said: ‘A show full of good things… haunting dance, rowdy song, raunchy show tunes, ventriloquism, stand-up comedy and political satire… no serious fan of 21st-century theatre should miss it.’ Brighton Festival is co-commissioning it – because it’s the kind of risk you let us take.”
Call 01273 709709 to book tickets or visit www.brightonfestival.org
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018_019_LS319_festivalbartlett
4/26/07
6:44 PM
Page 2
BRIGHTON FESTIVAL
Maid in Brighton Andrew Kay talks to Neil Bartlett about his forthcoming production of Jean Genet’s The Maids during the Brighton Festival
Do you live in Brighton? Yes we have been in Brighton for some time now, nearly 13 years. Is this your first Brighton production? Some of my work has toured here, to the Theatre Royal Brighton. Gloria, a company I formed in the 80s, performed at St Barnabas and the Royal Pavilion music room. But this is my first Brighton-based production. It’s site-specific – we are performing it at the Old Ship Hotel.
I’m currently directing for the Royal Shakespeare Company in the main house at Stratford and, at the same time, putting on this crazy show for a tiny audience in Brighton and i’ve got my new novel just out. I am happy not to be in a box, but it does get confusing. Do you do things for you or for the public? People can be surprised by what I do.
Is this your first site-specific work? No! I am old enough to be almost part of the first wave. I did it back in 1978, in car parks, on the street with Simon McBurney of Theatre de Complicité, in derelict warehouses, in Trafalgar Square…
“The Brighton Festival has a very diverse audience and that excites me”
After years at the forefront of what might be called alternative theatre you ended up running The Lyric Theatre in Hammersmith. Was that a big change? We did turn it round, and it was a big change. No one was more surprised than me that I would end up doing that job. It was a major change from what I did before – I never thought I would be invited to run a major theatre. I never saw it as my job to do legitimate or straight work. I’m one of a group of people that worked to erode that distinction erroneously called ’the establishment’ and ‘the fringe’ in the 80s and 90s. I am part of a generation that moves between the two.
Did you do administrative work at the Lyric? Yes and no. I created the Lyric as an institution with a close colleague called Simon Mellor who I have known since 1981 and I am still working with him. He was the man who did the nuts and bolts and I was the public face. But all of the ideas we share, it is a symbiotic relationship. So no nuts and bolts are party to every decision: staffing, ticket pricing, the public image of the building are all as important as what happens when the curtain goes up. I am most concerned with who I work with and with who sees my work.
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Is that the premise that you have used for The Maids? The Brighton Festival has a very diverse audience and that excites me. The Genet Estate doesn’t often give permission for a new translation and I had permission. I thought I will only get to direct this once myself so I want to do it with a very special group of performers – Kathryn Hunter, Hayley Carmichael and Geraldine Alexander and, by good fortune, all happen to be free for Brighton Festival, which is extraordinary good luck. There was a moment when filming the latest Harry Potter movie looked likely to spoil our plans as Kathryn is in it, but that is now not a problem. Which came first: the permission to translate or the commission from the festival? The permission to translate, but festival producer Jane McMorrow has been bugging me for years to make something especially for the festival. I took it to her and said I thought it was the right idea and asked if we could find the right space. That took a long time and we almost cancelled because we couldn’t find that right space. Then, at the last minute, the Old Ship Hotel came on board. It is an amazing building and the room we are performing in is on the next floor to the corridor where all the hotel maids live – it is a bizarrely close relationship. As we work, some of the hotel maids will be about. We move into the hotel a week before the production opens.
Call 01273 709709 to book tickets or visit www.brightonfestival.org
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4/27/07
9:09 AM
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BRIGHTON FESTIVAL
Is this your first Genet play? No, I did Splendids at the Lyric, the English language premiere. The play was found in a safe after Genet’s death and had been written in the early 50s, then lost. Edmund White asked me if I knew about it, and I asked the estate if I could translate it. Julian Clary was in it, looking very beautiful in evening dress and carrying a machine gun – a very good look for Julian. Your production of Oliver Twist was very true to the book and very bleak… Yes, it was Dickens and not Lionel Bart. It has just opened in Boston in the US. People love it, and it goes to New York after that. The simple trick is that in my adaptation all the words spoken were written by Dickens. The guts of Dickens are in his sentences – a terrible black energy and humour. It all comes down to language, and it’s the same with Genet, the extraordinary way that people talk. When The Maids originally opened at a fashionable Paris theatre, a rather grand lady in the audience went up to Genet afterwards and said, “Monsieur Genet, I have maids myself and they do not talk like that!” He said, “No, but if I were a maid, that is how I would talk.” There is a very particular way he talks, a particular poetry. Are his words hard to translate even though you’re fluent in French? I wouldn’t say I’m fluent, but my work translating classic French theatre is a good discipline. Genet is florid, but he is flinty and
really means what he says. It’s a real bugger and it’s very hard. He loves to use puns and and inappropriate juxtapositions of words, taking a glamorous word and throwing it against a word from the gutter. As translator you have to get all those shifts of language. One character says, “The hem of my robe is bejewelled with tears, now re-arrange it you slut.” His language takes leaps from one world to another and you have to get that and find performers that can handle the shift. Kathryn can do that, she is an extraordinary performer, a lead actress with Theatre de Complicité. I have worked with her before.
“There will be just over 100 seats, with the audience very close to the actors – if you don’t tuck your feet in, the cast will trip up” Will this production be very intimate then? Yes, very intimate.There will be just over 100 seats, with the audience very close to the actors – if you don’t tuck your feet in, the cast will trip up. It’s a play that should be an intimate encounter. The atmosphere is very highly charged and claustrophobic.
Call 01273 709709 to book tickets or visit www.brightonfestival.org
Do you avoid watching other versions, such as the film adaptation? I never have seen the film and I am too far into my own thoughts but I might watch it later. I’m trying to get a sense of the time he wrote it – 1946/47 in Paris, after the devastation of occupation. Genet was involved with the resistance, and was controversially on the rooftops at the fall of Paris. Then in 1947, Dior launches its new look and Paris is once again the capital of glamour, and Genet was in touch with that world too. The characters talk about Chanel-designed couture dresses. That is the world that I have used to fuel my imagination. Are there plans to tour the play after Brighton? No, but we would love to do it again, although I’m not sure that we will ever all manage to get this fantastic company together again. They are all on board for this one very special event. Any plans to film the production? No. My focus is always on the relationship between the live performer and a live audience. I direct operas and plays, I translate classical French drama and I write novels. What do you want – blood? The Maids, Old Ship Hotel, Friday 11–Saturday 26 May (except Mon 14 and 21 May) 9.15pm, £15 (post show talk on Thursday 24 May, free to ticket holders). The Maids is sponsored by Matthew Andrews Photographer latest 7 19
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A-to-glee 26 Letters continues its celebration of writing for kids 26 Letters is a growing four-day mini festival within the Brighton Festival. It is a chance to explore the world of children’s writing with some of today’s top exponents of the art. From toddlers to teens, the entire spectrum of youth fiction and non-fiction is covered: fantasy, adventure, science fiction, humour – you name it, 26 Letters has it. There’s quizzes, talks, workshops and readings, and even a talk by Ann Cassidy for adults who want to write for children. Don’t miss some of the country’s top writers and their famous characters (Angelina Ballerina, Bare Bear), and excellent artists who co-write some of the best books, like local artist/political cartoonist and now awardwinning children’s illustrator Chris Riddell. One of this year’s hot tickets will inevitably be TV star Harry Hill who has written Tim, The Tiny Horse about Tim, a horse who lives in a matchbox with a Tic Tac box as a conservatory and a mildly odd obsession with Anna Ford. For adults there is an illustrators’ evening at which the comic book genre, graphic novels and manga will be discussed. Putting the record straight will be David Lloyd who created the imagery for V For Vendetta with Alan Moore. A great opportunity to find out what it is, why your teenagers love it and perhaps even how to do it yourself. Books for children are an exciting, innovative and valuable art form and this exciting festival celebrates this fact by involving both children and adults in how they are created. 26 Letters features a range of events and runs Thu 17–Sun 20 May. For full details see the festival brochure or www.brightonfestival.org.uk, or call 01273 709709
Lashings of fun Family enjoyment as The Famous Five come to Hove Generation after generation of British children has grown up enjoying the idyllic world of Enid Blyton and her characters. I for one was obsessed by the Secret Seven, The Rat-a-Tat Mystery, and Noddy when I was very young, and of course the Famous Five with Julian, Dick, Anne, George, and of course, Timmy the dog. Then years later the entire genre was lovingly recreated and gently parodied by The Comic Strip in their immortal TV spoof Five Go Mad In Dorset where the line “lashings of ginger beer” became a catchphrase for all things Blyton, even if Enid never actually penned those exact words herself. Friends with children tell me that Enid Blyton is as big as ever, rebranded of course with new covers, art and a modern look, and I am delighted to hear that she is still as popular today, as I know it fired my imagination and love of books as a child.
I am equally delighted to see that Five are going mad in St Ann’s Well Gardens with a Famous Five family day – Five Go Mad In St Ann’s Well Gardens. Hidden across the park are five specially commissioned artworks by artists, sculptors and performers from across the country, each of which will provide a cryptic clue to a classic children’s book title. The Famous Five themselves will also be on hand (courtesy of Incisor Theatre Company) to help you and your family along and there will be madcap musical entertainment supplied by the Cosmic Sausages. And add to all this the fact the entire event is absolutely free – all you have to do is turn up with the kids, a picnic, and of course lashings of ginger beer! Five Go Mad In St Ann’s Well Gardens is at St Ann’s Well Gardens, Sun 20 May, 2pm–5pm, free. Call 01273 709709 or see www.brightonfestival.org.uk
Five Go Mad - Supported by Legal and General Assurance Society Ltd 20 latest 7
Call 01273 709709 to book tickets or visit www.brightonfestival.org
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Street wise Each year the streets of Brighton are invaded by Streets Of Brighton, a celebration of the weird and wild, beautiful, bizarre, sensational and sometimes downright silly… There’s no point trying to define Streets Of Brighton, it is almost undefinable. It is a gathering of artists, performers, acrobats, mimes, singers, dancers, comedians and plain old exhibitionists who, for two days (and this year an extra evening), will take to the street to enthrall us all. Street entertainment has always been a part of British culture, despite our native reserve and local bye laws. From Punch And Judy and street cryers to modern day buskers and mimes. Streets Of Brighton is the perfect opportunity to see the very best of the form, in the unique atmosphere of Brighton city centre, arguably the most relaxed and tolerant city in Europe.
This year, brace yourself for encounters with the Cuddly Fluffkins, jaw-dropping choreography from Motionhouse, scurvy squidsucking pirates and a double headed kipper, slapstick, giant prawns, fantasy creatures from Spain, comedy from France, yes France, and a Swiss box, yes you read that right. This year the format is slightly different with fewer companies but a higher calibre and it’s all scheduled in a structured way that it is hoped will mean more people will be able to see the entire programme. It might all seem very silly, and some of it certainly is, but don’t you just love it? City centre, Pavilion Gardens and North Laine, Thursday 10 (evening), then Friday 11 and Saturday 12 May, 1.305.30pm, free
Streets of Brighton - Supported by Legal and General Assurance Society Ltd
Thereby hangs a tale Family fun worth borrowing a family to see Them With Tails is all about spinning tales – and wearing them! Two chaps take to the stage (and yes they are wearing tails) to perform three very unlikely yarns, plus one act of preposterous, onthe-spot storytelling. It all adds up to uproarious and hilarious entertainment for the whole family. The show was a sell-out success at last year‘s Edinburgh Fringe Festival, where it gained brilliant press reviews, and they are now ready to take Brighton by storm. They promise a unique show where your unlikely and ridiculous suggestions can spring suddenly to life.
It’s improvisation (but with added tails) in which the Tall Stories and Network Of Stuff companies bring you a ‘masterclass of classic Tomfoolery’. The show features brand new stories, specially written and part-commissioned by The Brighton Festival. The word is: bring the kids. If you don’t have any, borrow some. But whatever it takes, do not miss out on this unforgettable bout of simply divine silliness. Bryson Hall, The Old Market, Tuesday 8-Friday 11 May, 6pm. Saturday 12 May, 11am and 3pm. Ticket office 01273 709709
Them with Tails - Sponsored by Family Investments
Call 01273 709709 to book tickets or visit www.brightonfestival.org
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BRIGHTON FESTIVAL a bit Penguin Café Orchestra, a bit classical, a bit folky, and a bit weird! I think that this is going to be one of the more eclectic performances of my lunchtime programme. Gill: Is it quite gentle music then? Guy: It’s very gentle music. If you want a wild card, I would recommend coming to this show. Tue 8 May
Martin Helmchen
Neil Cowley Trio
If music be… Gill: I first heard them sing together during their first season as principals at the English National Opera. What really struck me about these two was how compatible their voices were. It is often difficult to find really well matched soprano and mezzo singers. Their voices just seem to fit so well when they sing duets it’s a really special feeling. It’s been quite a few years since we’ve featured two female singers during the lunchtime series, so it should be a really special performance. Guy: And will they be singing opera arias or will they be doing other songs too? Gill: A real mixture: some solo songs and one or two arias from the operas. Wed 9 May
Misja Fitzgerald-Michel Gill: A jazz guitarist. Tell me more… Guy: I saw Misja at a festival in Dijon and found it quite surprising that solo guitar could be so engaging for a whole hour, but he’s like a firework going off! He really captivates his audience and when you read who he’s been involved with it’s quite impressive – the French jazz scene, which is fantastic, as well as the New York jazz scene. And he’s played with some of the really great musicians from George Russell to Ravi Coltrane, John Coltrane’s son, and all sorts of people. I’ve never seen anybody play a jazz 12-string guitar before, but it’s incredible. Gill: Where it says here in the brochure he “learned his significant chops with an impressive array of mentors”, what does that mean? Guy: Jazz chops are all about changing time signatures very quickly, and so he’s very impressive at the old chops! He’s obviously learnt with some fairly significant people, such as the French bass player Michel Portal, and these influences really come through. Thu 17 May
Ensemble na Mara Gill: I first saw this group play in the Royal Overseas League competition and what really impressed me was the approach to their performance. During these competitions the performers are often so nervous that they don’t seem to enjoy themselves, but they just had 22 latest 7
Robert Mitchell and Omar Puente
so much fun, they were clearly really enjoying both the music and the performance. Guy: And they play traditional Celtic music too, Scottish reels and things like that? Gill: Yes they do. Scottish reels or Strauss: it seems to give them the same pleasure. The other thing is that the Strauss Piano Quartet is quite hard for young players and I’ve never heard anyone play it live. It’s so rarely played and it’s a lovely piece. So, to have that and the Sibelius, which is a difficult one too, is great. Mon 14 May
Guy: Years ago I put on Wayne Shorter, with Robert Mitchell as support. At the interval I had the ‘jazz police’ wanting to knock my block off, but after talking to Wayne and reading The Guardian reviews they were absolutely blown away by Robert. He’s an astounding player, he has a really unique and very unusual sense of timing and the music that he’s doing with Omar Puente, the Cuban violin player, is sublime. It travels everywhere from Latin to jazz – even classical influences. Gill: Does Cuban violin use the same sort of tonal structure? Guy: It is subtlety different, but the biggest difference is the timing. It’s about playing well before the beat and really bending stuff round to get that real latin swing effect. Sat 19 May
Kris Drever
Royal String Quartet
Guy: So to another Scottish performer. The folk singer-songwriter thing has really picked up in the UK, and since it has come back in vogue it has opened up a much broader audience. Drever is one of those people that’s popular to the new converts, but comes from a very traditional background. His father was one of the founders of Wolfstone, one of the big Scottish folk bands, and he’s simply a great singer-songwriter. It’s going to be a really good thing to see within the lunchtime series. Fri 11 May
Gill: The most amazing thing about this quartet is how they interact with each other during a performance – they have to know each part of a piece as intimately as their own and anticipate every single note whether they play it or not. Once a string quartet has been together for a while, the music they play moves on to a new level. To have such a high standard quartet in the lunchtime series (because normally the lunchtimes are all about emerging or new artists) is a rarity not to be missed. Guy: So what will they be playing? Gill: Haydn and Beethoven, but what’s exceptional about this performance is the standard at which these pieces will be played. Wed, 23 May
It clearly is a passion for Gill Kay and Guy Morley as they discuss their highlights of the lunchtime concerts at the Pavilion Theatre Sarah Tynan & Stephanie Marshall
Gill: Martin is one of those young instrumentalists that has all the technique, but he’s also a real character and his personality shines through in his performance. It doesn’t interfere with what he’s doing but you get a sense of ‘this is what I’m going to do, this is what I’m going to be‘. He’s giving a very mixed programme; standard stuff like Beethoven and Schubert, but also Messiaen, which is unusual for the lunchtimes as it’s challenging music. But he plays it fantastically well so don’t be put off! Fri 18 May
Brighton Festival Youth Choir Gill: We’ve nurtured this choir from the start. They were formed because there wasn’t really a youth choir in the town that was singing at a really, really high standard. It was started by, and still run by, the music director, Juliet Poachin, a singer herself and partner of James who runs the main Brighton Festival Choir. Guy: Will they be singing classical repertoire? Gill: They’re doing a really mixed programme, everything from early Purcell to Britten and a couple of encores that are real lollipops. Mon 7 May
Ted Barnes Guy: Ted Barnes got into the programme via a really unusual route. One of our original deals fell through just as we were going to press with the brochure, and I had to find something really quickly. Anyway, this CD had been sat on the edge of my desk and I thought I’ll just try this then! I didn’t know who he was, and it’s beautiful music, quirky, odd, slightly electronic,
Neil Cowley Trio Guy: Neil comes from the commercial side of jazz and funk, and has been in really big bands, including the Brand New Heavies. He’s a very accomplished musician, one of the leading British jazz pianists along with, I think, Robert Mitchell. So this is an ideal opportunity to see someone who can really get to grips with some fairly complicated stuff that is based in that fantastic period in jazz. Gill: If you are a newcomer to jazz piano, is he a good one to start you off? Guy: Absolutely! Tue, 22 May These events are all for the Lunchtime Concerts programme at Pavilion Theatre, Brighton Dome, 1pm, £7.50. Call 01273 709709 or see the Festival brochure or www.brightonfestival.org
Call 01273 709709 to book tickets or visit www.brightonfestival.org
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Brought to book Liam Browne on the making of Brighton Festival’s literature programme I began working as a literature programmer almost by accident. In the 1990s I worked on a general year-long arts festival in my home town of Derry in Northern Ireland. I noticed that while most art forms seemed well covered there were no book events at all. So I offered to programme some and that’s how I started. From there it became a career, working on festivals or, for a few years, at the South Bank Centre in London where they run live literature events across the year. Now I’m freelance and as well as the Brighton Festival I also programme the Dublin Writers’ Festival. The whole process of programming is not unlike painting the Forth bridge – no sooner have you finished than you start again. Once the festival’s over you almost immediately begin to think about the following year. For some of the major international writers, if you’re trying to bring them specially to your festival, you need to be inviting them a good year ahead. There are so many festivals now, so many invitations for the big names to consider. You have to find some angle, something distinct, that will persuade them to come to Brighton.
“The Victoria Wood ‘in conversation’, for instance, arose from the fact that she has used the Mass Observation archive at the University of Sussex” Festivals get reputations and words filter through the writing/publishing world as to which festivals writers should be encouraged to attend – or should be discouraged from attending. Publishers have so much power, often they are the first point of contact between a festival and a writer. Their previous experience of that festival and of how their writers have been treated is crucial. It’s not just the hour or the hour and a half on stage that matters, it’s the travel arrangements to and from the festival, it’s the smoothness and professionalism with which the venue is run, it’s the hotel, the hospitality, all these things come into it. If you’re blessed with holding a festival in an interesting city or town, you’re off to a great start. And writers and artists like coming to Brighton. Overall the balance of the programme needs to be right; between programming the writers you personally admire alongside those that the audience want to see, between the popular writers and speakers who will sell out and those you think are interesting but may not draw a big crowd, between writers who are at the festival to promote new books and writers coming to Brighton for one-off special events. There should always be some events in the programme that take their inspiration from some local connection with Brighton and Hove or with Sussex. The Victoria Wood ‘in conversation’, for instance, arose from the fact that she has used the Mass Observation archive at the University of Sussex to research her characters. So immediately the event has a local flavour and offers the audience an awareness of the archive and its value, which they might not otherwise have gained. Similarly with The City Reads event, which this year is focusing on Daphne du Maurier’s Rebecca. Usually a literature event is simply a one-off but in the case of The City Reads it’s the culmination of a whole series of events that have been happening in Brighton and Hove from March onwards. For the two months between March and May, locals are encouraged to read Rebecca and there’s a range of events taking place which focus on the book. It means that, come the festival, the audience attending The City Reads event have almost all read the book and are enthused by it. It makes for a great interaction between the panel of writers and that audience. City Reads is Sponsored by Hotel Du Vin and Bistro
Liam’s must-see events Bernard-Henri Lévy A programmer’s dream really; larger than life, he’s full of opinions and keen to express them. He seems to thrive on being controversial and is not too concerned if he offends people. His take on contemporary America will be fascinating, following the road-trip he made (which is described in American Vertigo), and all the better, in some ways, for being a response to the United States that doesn’t come from the usual Anglo-American axis. Corn Exchange, Brighton Dome, Thu 24 May, 7.30pm, £7.50. Bernard-Henri Levy is Supported by The Open University Dave Eggers and Valentino Achak Deng I have never actually heard Dave Eggers read from and talk about his work but am told that he is wonderfully charismatic on stage. A new Eggers book is always an event but what makes this one so unusual is that you have the actual inspiration and hero of the book, Valentino Achak Deng, participating in the event also. Eggers has written a fiction about a real-life figure, so how faithful has he been in the journey from fact to fiction. Corn Exchange, Brighton Dome, Sat 26 May, 7pm, £7.50. On the Shelf – A Modern Love Affair with Libraries Commissioning writers to produce something on a given theme is one of the best parts of the job, finding the right theme and the right group of writers. In this instance, Lionel Shriver, Rupert Thomson and Sasha Dugdale will talk about the relationship they, as writers, have with libraries. So many writers are dependent on libraries for research, be it the British Library or their local one. Or it may have played an important part in their decision to become a writer in the first place. Almost always, with commissions, you don’t know until the night what take a writer will have on a given theme. Jubilee Library, Sat 19 May, 7.30pm, £7.50. Tony Harrison Compared to previous decades there seems much less political passion infusing literature and the arts generally today. Whether that comes from cynicism, defeatism or whatever, I don’t know but Tony Harrison is someone who has always engaged with the politics of the day in an extraordinary way. He has made documentaries on subjects such as Hirorshima and the fatwa on Salman Rushdie and went to Bosnia during the war as a reporter for The Guardian where he wrote a response in poetry to what he saw. He has been unwavering in his conviction that a writer must respond to what is going on around him in daily life or what he sees elsewhere in the world. That sort of conviction is rare today. Paganini Room - Old Ship Hotel, Thu 10 May, 7pm, £7.50
Call 01273 709709 to book tickets or visit www.brightonfestival.org
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BRIGHTON FESTIVAL
On the money Each year Brighton Festival is made possible by the kind support of its many sponsors, companies and individuals who, through their generosity, help make so many events happen. We hear from a selection of 2007’s sponsors about why they like to get involved and what events they are looking forward to
Paul Reed, brand and communications manager, Southern
Michael Beard, group editor, Newsquest (Sussex) Ltd
This year, Southern is delighted to be associated with Brighton Festival on a number of fronts. We have entered into a three-year partnership with the festival organisers which enables us to give our full support to this worldclass event. We will be providing a special late-night train from Brighton to London which will allow people to leave the festival later than usual, arriving in London just after midnight. We are also pleased to be cosponsors of what promises to be a truly outstanding performance by the highly acclaimed French company KompleXKapharnaüM, with their bold, innovative and imaginative show PlayRec. Huge video projections, music and live performances will be played out using Brighton’s New England Development (formerly the station car park, site of the city’s famous locomotive works and Isetta bubble car factory) as an atmospheric backdrop. Described as “an audiovisual adventure”, this performance is one that shouldn’t be missed. We’re sure it will be an enjoyable festival for everyone who visits, and we look forward to bringing people from far and wide.
I am particularly looking forward to seeing the world premiere of Laurence Olivier’s Henry V at the Dome Concert Hall on 21 May. It should be fascinating to see the combination of a digitally remastered classic film and one of the world’s greatest orchestras. As the programme says this will be movie history in the making. A huge amount of work has gone into this, using the very latest technology. Combined with more than 200 musicians it really promises to be a highlight of the festival and one that will be remembered for some time. I have also been drawn to Gordon Brown: The Man Behind The Politics at the Dome Concert Hall on 13 May. Coming just days after the local elections, it is an understatement to say it will be interesting to see and hear what the Chancellor and possible future Prime Minister has to say. In what has been described as a “frank and wide-ranging interview”, he will discuss subjects ranging from his own life and motivations to his vision of politics. How much will he reveal? We will have to wait and see.
Ali Giles, marketing, Wall’s Ice Cream, Unilever UK
Jonathan Ericson, managing partner, Baker Tilly Sussex
At this year’s Festival, I am most looking forward to taking a friend of mine to see Les Ballets C. de la B.’s Import/Export at the Corn Exchange. She is a huge ballet fan and I thought it would be a great idea to broaden her mindset as far as dance goes and explore something a bit different. I am taking my mother to Afternoon Tea With Joan Bakewell. We are going to enjoy the sights and sounds of Brighton and the street acts around the festival venues before sitting down to a five-star afternoon tea and chat with such an iconic journalist.
My must-see pick of the 2007 festival has to be the UK premiere of La Traviata. As one of today’s most popular operas, it is being performed this year as an intimate chamber production in the Royal Pavilion. Tickets sold out within minutes of them being available, making this one of the events of the fortnight. With just a string trio and piano as accompanying music, Verdi’s La Traviata promises to be a moving and dramatic performance. My second pick is c90, the award-winning tale of “quiet lives and small kindnesses”. Originally performed at last year’s Edinburgh Festival, this one-man show about memory and hope will undoubtedly captivate the audience’s imagination.
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Call 01273 709709 to book tickets or visit www.brightonfestival.org
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BRIGHTON FESTIVAL
Colin Paterson, head of marketing and sales, First Capital Connect
Pippa Grey, relationship manager, Lloyds TSB Commercial, Brighton and Hove
From being firstly intrigued by Reeves & Mortimer’s Big Night Out to finding Shooting Stars (including the excellent Matt Lucas as George Dawes) terrifically entertaining, I have always admired Vic Reeves aka Jim Moir and his sharp wit and wacky, almost slapstick sense of humour. I can think of few more entertaining and amusing ways of spending some time than hearing him read from his penetrating, insightful and no doubt hilarious memoirs of his childhood – Me: Moir. With the whole rich spectrum of music, theatre, dance and comedy to choose from at Brighton Festival, the more cultured visitor may be horrified that I’m looking forward to the Children’s Parade. But as a dad of four young boys, the fun, family atmosphere of the Children’s Parade on Saturday 5 May has a natural appeal for me. With a fantastic carnival atmosphere, and the bright-eyed excitement of thousands of young participants, it’s bound to draw proud mums, dads, grandparents, aunts, uncles, siblings and more. Let the festival begin!
As a newcomer to Brighton Festival, what has excited me most about the programme is the terrific variety of events on offer. My two choices reflect this spectrum with two rather different favourites. Lloyds TSB are taking 80 guests to New Latin Spirit starring Roberto Fonseca and Marta Topferova, so our enthusiasm for this event is self-evident. The evening is set to be a really uplifting, fun and funky event. The screening of Liberace Of Baghdad looks to me to be an intriguing and unusual take on this troubling situation. The opportunity to be involved in a round-table discussion with such knowledgeable hosts afterwards is unique.
Jo Osborn, press officer, Southern Water
Tony Horn, commercial manager, Royal Bank Of Scotland
The Maids at the Old Ship Hotel sounds really exciting. I love the idea of watching a play somewhere other than a theatre – it should be very atmospheric being in the hotel for the performance. I’m also really looking forward to Mahabharata – it is going to be stunning. There is a bit of everything involved in this production: music, dance, puppetry and magic. What more could I want?
Helen Sparkes, community programmes manager, Southern Water
The Royal Bank Of Scotland is a committed sponsor of Brighton Festival and is delighted to be involved once again with this year’s programme of exciting events. As sponsors of the Vic Reeves Me: Moir event, we plan to take along 40 guests to what promises to be a revealing and, no doubt, occasionally surreal event. I am also looking forward to The Armonico Consort’s version of Mozart’s fairytale, The Magic Flute.
I have set aside the month of May to feast on a smorgasbord of cultural delights. From the sublime to the ridiculous – Vic Reeves to Gordon Brown. I expect to experience in one month a wider variety of culture, entertainment, education and pure pleasure than many people experience in a lifetime. I can’t wait!
Brighton Festival funders, partners, sponsors and supporters, 2007 Brighton Festival is grateful for the generous support of the following funders, partners, companies, individuals, trusts and foundations: Funders Brighton & Hove City Council Arts Council England, South East National Media Partner The Guardian Regional Media Partner The Argus Festival Partners EDF Energy Southern
Sponsors and Supporters Active Mortgage Advice Jon and Julia Aisbitt American Express Fund at Sussex Community Foundation Aneela Rose PR Art Data Systems Limited AVT Limited Baker Tilly BBC Southern Counties Beard Digital Printing Bonett's Estate Agents Brighton Festival Friends Brighton Marina Brighton Square Caffyns Volvo Brighton City Books, Hove Classic FM
Crown Office Row Chambers, Brighton csma The De Vere Grand, Brighton DMH Stallard Dunard Fund Facelift GB Ltd Facilitate Ltd Family Investments First Capital Connect Futuremedia Plc Healys Solicitors Hotel du Vin and Bistro Howlett Clarke Solicitors ITV Local Julia Robinson Catering Ltd Latest 7
Call 01273 709709 to book tickets or visit www.brightonfestival.org
Legal & General Assurance Society Ltd Lloyds TSB Group plc The Lynn Foundation MacConvilles Surveying (Built Environment Consultants) Matthew Andrews Photographer National Car Parks neo: creative Nido Marketing One Digital The Open University Pure The Royal Bank Of Scotland
Redhead Design Ltd Selits Southern Water Spofforths Chartered Accountants Springboard Coaching Synchronicity Productions Ltd The Treatment Rooms Trevor Sorbie Brighton Ltd Unilever UK University of Brighton University of Sussex Waitrose Worth WSL (Brighton) Ltd
Thanks also go to: Big Yellow Storage, Gunn’s Flowers, Network Rail, One Paston Place, Sainsbury’s, Simultané, The Picture Works Limited
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026_LS319_festivalsHenryV
4/27/07
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BRIGHTON FESTIVAL Henry V is Supported by University of Sussex and Brighton Square
Run Lola Run
Cry “God for Harry” A legendary performance by Laurence Olivier as Henry V is revitalised for this live centenary event A legend on stage and film, a classic movie and a score by a major 20th century composer. It’s a recipe made in heaven. Except that William Walton’s score had, for years, been lost. But now, after painstaking research, Brighton Festival has recreated the film score and, using new technology developed by Granada International Media, the music soundtrack has been removed from the original film enabling this amazing event to take place. The original project was Olivier’s own adaptation of the Shakespeare script and he not only starred in the film but also directed. Conceived at the height of the Second World War, it was a timely rallying call to raise flagging British morale. Olivier himself described Walton’s specially commissioned score as a perfect fit that had, “inner vibrance, its energy… that exuberance, that spirit, that heart-quickening feeling…”
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A cast of over 200, including The Royal Philharmonic Orchestra, join Brighton Festival Chorus and Brighton Youth Choir to perform, for the very first time, Walton’s original score whilst audiences watch Olivier’s breathtaking performance. The 1944 film has also been digitally re-mastered so that the print screened will be of the highest possible quality. Conductor Carl Davis, who’s no stranger to the art of conducting film scores at live screenings, and in fact a film score composer in his own right, will be wielding his baton as the armies of England and France wield their arms and do battle. This live event is a major milestone in both music and movie history and promises to be one of the highlights of this year’s festival programme. Laurence Olivier’s Henry V is at Brighton Dome Concert Hall, 21 May, 7.30pm, £12.50–£50. Call 01273 709709 or see www.brightonfestival.org
“Mankind: probably the most mysterious species on our planet. A mystery of open questions. Who are we? Where do we come from? Where are we going? How do we know what we believe to know? Why do we believe anything at all? Innumerable questions looking for an answer, an answer which will raise the next question and the following answer will raise a following question and so on and so forth. But in the end, isn't it always the same question and always the same answer?” The opening words from Tom Twyker’s 1998 film. A breathtaking no-holds-barred race against time that follows central character, Lola, as she dashes across Berlin to try and raise 100,000 Marks to save her hapless boyfriend from his gangster enemy. In stark contrast to Laurence Olivier’s Henry V – but with no less impact – this film will be screened with a new live score by The Bays in the Concert Hall, Brighton Dome. The Bays however do not have a restored score, in fact they have no score at all. Nor do they rehearse or make records. Their entire performance will be an of-the-moment improvisation. Exhilarating music that seamlessly segues hip hop, drum and bass and ambient grooves as the film runs, totally live and without a safety net. That’s got to be seen and heard! Run Lola Run is at Brighton Dome Concert Hall, 5 and 6 May, 8pm, £16. Call 01273 709709 or see www.brightonfestival.org
Call 01273 709709 to book tickets or visit www.brightonfestival.org
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20th July 2007
*Live band *Charity Fundraising Auction *Food by Circa
www.pelhamhouse.com Pelham House Conference Centre & Hotel St Andrews Lane, Lewes, BN7 1UW T 01273 488600 E Reception@pelhamhouse.com
Main stockists of the infamous Bugaboo Cameleon & Gecko – in stock – phone for latest offers! Units 5 & 6, Cliffe Shopping Arcade, Lewes, East Sussex, BN7 2AN 01273 470 555 Shop online at
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LEWES
Take time off in Lewes Five great Lewes businesses to check out next time you’re in town Andrew James Designs
Pen To Paper
Andrew James Designs, the furniture and home accessory shop run by husband and wife team Andrew and Wendy James, is well worth a visit. Although it appears to be a small shop, they have a huge range of furniture available. They specialise in hand-made British furniture that can be made to measure using existing designs, or bespoke to your specific requirements, in pine, oak or painted finishes. You will also find other ranges from around the world to complement the British handmade furniture. With over 20 years in the furniture business Andrew and Wendy will be only too pleased to help you choose your perfect piece of furniture. As well as the furniture you will also find a beautiful range of home accessories, from mugs to lamps, photo frames to luxurious cushions, candles to vases and much, much more. So if you’re looking for that piece of furniture that you just can’t find, or maybe a new wardrobe for the spare room, this little gem of a shop in Lewes is a must-visit. Andrew James Designs, 41 High Street, Lewes. Call 01273 486886 or see www.andrewjamesdesigns.co.uk
After five years in the North Laine area of Brighton, Pen To Paper was delighted to open a second shop in Lewes in October 2005. Situated at 170A High Street – opposite the Post Office and next to Parterre – they have a range of stationery, from quirky to quality. You can try out the pens, or browse the shelves of journals, notecards, seals and sealing wax. Enjoy the writing paper with tissue-lined envelopes and work your way through 26 colours of fountain pen inks and cartridges. They now also offer a service providing personalised stationery and invitations. Pen To Paper, 170A High Street, Lewes. Call 01273 478847 or see www.pentopaperonline.co.uk
Circa Now approaching its seventh year at the cutting edge of Lewes cuisine, Circa at Pelham House continues to serve up its unique global British cooking to a growing army of loyal fans across Sussex and beyond. Head chef Marc Bolger takes patrons’ taste buds on a plated journey around the world, from grilled soy beef, spring roll, bean sprout salad, to blue swimmer crabmeat served with goat’s cheese samosas. In addition to the seven-days-a-week fine dining operation, Circa also organises weddings and dinners at its elegant Pelham House hotel base, as well as running one of the country’s finest and most original outside catering operations. To find out more, please call Sarah Penlington on 01273 471345. Circa at Pelham House, St Andrews Lane, Lewes. Call 01273 471345 or see www.circacirca.com
Pelham House
The Baby Shop
The elegant Pelham House hotel and conference centre in the heart of Lewes provides an ideal venue for all your meetings. “We’re only two minutes’ walk from the station and yet we have the atmosphere of a peaceful country house hotel,” says Lindsey Galpin. Lindsey is is the events and arts co-ordinator at the centre. “How many venues of this size even have an events and arts co-ordinator?” she laughs. “But, the families who own Pelham love the arts so we like to support local arts events when we can. We have exhibitions, concerts and we even had an opera in the garden. This year it’s the summer ball in aid of a children’s hospice. Have a look on our website – www.pelhamhouse.com – for details on how to buy tickets. “Practically, we have 32 bedrooms and nine meeting rooms, accommodating two to 180 people. From national companies to local organisations, we’re definitely flexible. It’s a friendly family-owned business with the aim of making your visit perfect.” Pelham House, St Andrews Lane, Lewes. Call 01273 488600 or see www.pelhamhouse.com
The Baby Shop is a great independent nursery retailer with a wide range of great services. Not only can you choose from their fantastic range of washable nappies and eco friendly/disposable nappies, organic toiletries, innovative wooden toys (including Wheelybugs) and more, they also offer excellent customer service, with one to one demos, plus a qualified car-seat fitting service. There’s deposit/payment scheme available, plus free storage of baby goods prior to your baby’s arrival. If you can’t make it to the shop, you can also shop online or use mail order. The Baby Shop are stockists of all the major brands including Stokke, Jane, Phil ’N’ Teds and many, many more. The Baby Shop, Unit 5 and 6, Cliffe Shopping Arcade and 34-36 Cliffe High Street, Lewes. Call 01273 470555 or see www.thebabyshoplewes.co.uk
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Colonic Hydrotherapy is now available at
The Hanover Clinic with Alison McDonald R.C.T (M.A.R.C.H.) The Hanover Clinic offers tranquil surroundings with private parking. Alison McDonald is a fully qualified, experienced and professionally registered therapist providing a holistic approach. For more information or to book an appointment please phone:
01273 692867 or 07976 260728 The Hanover Clinic 19A Hanover Crescent, Brighton, East Sussex BN2 9SB Offer expires 30th June 2007
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HEALTH
See more health tips at wavemagazine.co.uk
Spring cleaning
Health & fitness
Roger Groos and Maria Eady explain the numerous benefits of purging the enema within
TUESDAY 1
Colonics have a long history. Mentions of enema equipment in ancient Egypt, the Far East, South America and Aramaic texts dating from 200AD suggest a common folk ancestry. It is referred to in the Essene Gospel of peace which states: “the uncleanness within is greater than the uncleanness without. He who cleanses himself without, but within remains unclean, is like a tomb that outward is painted fair, but is within full of all manner of uncleannesses and abominations.”
Wipe the slate clean The major benefits of colonics may be divided into three groups. Firstly, in combating functional bowel problems such as constipation and irritable bowel syndrome (IBS) and some bowel diseases such as diverticulosis. Secondly, treating other conditions that accompany poor bowel function, including arthritis, eczema, hormonal conditions such as endometriosis, PMS or conditions due to increased pressure on other eliminatory organs (such as lungs, skin, kidneys and bladder). Lastly, colonics are very important in detoxing, but should be accompanied by dietary, lifestyle and spiritual measures, preferably between equinoxes. They can also help to wipe the slate clean during major life changes. Conditions prohibiting colonics are major heart disease, liver and kidney problems, uncontrolled hypertension, large hernias, any active inflammation of the bowel, severe anaemia and early stages of pregnancy. If in doubt, check with your therapist. The procedure is very simple: a speculum, 1.5in long, is inserted into the anus (so no long pipes), an inlet tube allows warm filtered water in, and an outlet tube carries water and waste away. The water and gentle abdominal massage stimulates the bowel to empty. Herbs may be used to help the process and probiotics might be implanted if an imbalance is present.
Relieving symptoms The treatment is not painful and your modesty is preserved at all times. Your therapist will make recommendations based on your case history, observation during treatment and kinesiology testing. The number of treatments depends on the condition being treated. Generally, underactive bowels (constipation) might need 4-6 treatments, whereas overactive (IBS type) might only need one or two. At least two treatments are a great help during a detox programme. Many of colonic customers are suffering with IBS symptoms, irregular bowel movements, bloating and pain. Colonics and eliminating certain foods from the diet can be very helpful in improving this condition. Always look for a registered therapist. The Association and Register of Colon Hydrotherapists (ARCH) is the longest-standing organisation in the UK and has been instrumental in setting training and practice standards for 20 years. See www.colonic-association.org or call 0870 241 6567 to find a therapist near you.
Abs Blast With Martin. Fitforall, 6pm, £3 Astanga Yoga Brighton Buddhist Centre, 12.45–2pm, & 6–7.30pm, £6/4 BE Pilates Mat Class Rehab/basic classes. 01273 273074 for info. Back2Balance. 5.45–6.45pm, & 7–8pm, £45 for six weeks Boxing Class Drop-in. Cheetahs Boxing Gym. 7.30–9pm, £4 (also every Fri 7–8pm, Sat 12–1.30pm and Mon 6–7pm, all £4) Children’s Kung Fu Ages 7–11. Cornerstone Community Centre. 4–5pm, £4 Flamenco Dance Lower/Int. The Dance Station. 8.15–9.15pm, £8.50 Flamenco Dance Technique Contact Ana for more info. The Dance Station. 7–8.15pm, £8.50 Hypnotherapy Free consultations with Peter J Hassell: smoking, anxiety& other issues. 07884 213 599 Iyengar Yoga Brighton Buddhist Centre, 1–2.15pm,. £6/4 Komaja’s Love Meditation Meditation and mantra singing. Komaja Centre, Hove. 7.30–9.30pm, £donation Kundilini Yoga Holistic Health Clinic, 6.30 –8pm, £6 drop-in, £20 for 4. Low Impact Aerobics Dean’s Leisure Centre. 8–9pm, £4 Tuesdays 7-9.30pm. Lunchtime Oasis Meditation Brighton Buddhist Centre, 1.15–1.45pm, £3/2. Mindfulness-Based Life Change Info: Rory 07739 556438. Bodhi Garden, 7–9.30pm, £10.
WEDNESDAY 2 Morning Soto Zen Meditation Info: Jay & Heather 01273 682974. Bodhi Garden. 7.30–8.30am, Suggested donation: £5. Open Meditation Evening Info: Richard 07796 331167. Bodhi Garden, 7.30–9pm, suggested donation: £5. Pilates with Rachel Attmere. New course starts today. The Acupuncture Clinic, 6.15–7.15pm, £42 for 6 classes – please phone to book a place: 01273 722422 Shaolin Tai Qi – Rou Quan St Mary Magdalen Centre, also same time Monday. 7.15pm–8.15pm, £8, (£25 for all four classes at the centre) Sivananda Yoga Beg/int. Revitalise. Call Helen 07722 046865. 9.30–10.45am Yoga Drop-in with Jackie Coulson. Wendy Whatling School of Dance. 9.15–10.45am (also Thu 7.45–8.45pm) Yummymummys Fitforall, 10.30am, £4 Yoga With Joanne. Coral Health/ Fitness. 1.30pm, £3.50 Yoga (Scaravelli inspired) with Hayley North. The Acupuncture Clinic, 7.30–9pm, £8 drop-in/£35 for 5 classes
THURSDAY 3 BE Pilates Semi-Private Matwork Classes Carla for info: 01273 273 074. BE Pilates Studio, Westdene, 10.15am and 6.30pm, (also same time Mondays) £75 for six weeks. Body Control Pilates Mixed & advanced classes. Holistic Health Centre, 8–9.15pm, £60 for 6 weeks Brightob Jamyang Group . Info: Ian 07758 150722. Bodhi
If you would like to comment on this story please email editorial@thelatest.co.uk
Garden, 7.30–9.30pm, suggested donation: £5. Hatha Fusion Yoga The Acupuncture Clinic, 9.30–10.30am, £6 Hatha Yoga Patcham Comm Centre. 07986 850029. 9.45–11.15am, £6 Hip Hop/R’n’B Dance Class Peacehaven Leisure Centre. 8pm drop in, £4.30
FRIDAY 4 Tai Chi Chuan Class For over 50s. Contact Ian on 07900 193230 for more details. Leach Court, 11.30am, £3 Tai Chi Peacehaven Leisure Centre. 7.30pm drop in, £4.30 Vajrasati Yoga Brighton Buddhist Centre, 6–7.30pm, £6/4 ViniYoga The Acupuncture Clinic, 9.30–10.30am, £7 dropin/£35 for 6 Yoga And Meditation Brighton Buddhist Centre, 10–11.30am, £6/£4 Yogalates Coral Health & Fitness, 6.30pm, £3.50
SATURDAY 5 BE Pilates Mat Class Beg/Improvers. 01273 273074 for info. Coast Chiropractic. 10–11am & 11am–12pm, £45 for six weeks Coretastic! With James. Fitforall, 10am, £4 Children’s Ki & Aikido For ages 4–7. Brighton Ki Centre, call Bob for info: 01273 323315. 9–9.45am, £2.50 Dynamic Flow Yoga With Tara and Niki. The Acupuncture Clinic, 11.15am–12.45pm, £8 Hatha Yoga (Scaravelli) 90minute class. Coral Health and Fitness.12pm, £4.50 Indoor Cycling Coral Health & Fitness, 9am & 10.15am £3.50
SUNDAY 6 Hangover Spin Fitforall, 10am, £4 Legs, Bums and Tums Coral Health & Fitness, 10.15am, £3.50 Women’s Yoga The Acupuncture Clinic, 11am–12.15pm, £40 for six
MONDAY 7 Astanga Yoga All levels with Kevin Donovan (Moksharaja). Brighton Buddhist Centre, 12.45–2pm, £6/4 Chen Tai Chi All levels, Davigdor School. 6–7pm, £7. Info: 07799 097776 Legs, Bums And Tums Deans Leisure Centre. £4, 5.30–6.30pm and 6.30–7.30pm Morning Meditation Info: Alan 07966 046524. Bodhi Garden, 7.30–8.30am Post/Ante Natal Pilates Babies welcome. The Acupuncture Clinic. Pre-book w/ penny on 07904 472605, 12.30–1.30pm, £60 for 6 wks Scaravelli Inspired Yoga With Peta Trousdell at Unit 4. Call 01273 846722 for more info. 10–11.30am Scaravelli Yoga The Acupuncture Clinic, 9.30–11am, £7 Shaolin Kung Fu All levels, Davigdor School. 7–8pm, £7 Tai Chi Chuan Class More info: 07900 193230. All Saints Church Hall, 8pm, £5 Unguided Meditation Info: Alan 07966 046524. Bodhi Garden, 6–7pm, Suggested donation: £5. Vajrasati Yoga All levels, Brighton Buddhist Centre, 1–2.15pm, £6/4 Womens Yoga (Scaravelli) The Acupuncture Clinic. 6.30–8pm, £9 drop-in,£32 for 4 Yoga (Scaravelli) All levels. Revitalise, 9.30–10.30am, £35 for 6/£7 drop-in
DIRECTORY The Acupuncture Clinic 143 Portland Road, Hove 01273 722422 All Saints Church Hall Eaton Road, Hove Ian Kendall: 07900 193230 www.ik-taichi.com Anahata Health Clinic 119–120 Edward Street, Kemp Town, 01273 698687 Back2Balance 35 Goldstone Villas, Hove 01273 206 868 BE Pilates Studio 121 Eldred Ave, Westdene Carla: 01273 273074 Bodhi Garden Centre 7 Ship St Gardens, Brighton Call Richard 07796 331167 Brighthelm Community Centre North Road, Brighton Brighton Buddhist Centre 17 Tichborne Street, Brighton 01273 772090 Brighton Ki Centre 12 Queens Square, Brighton Barry: 07854 389606 Brighton Natural Health Centre Regent Street, Brighton 01273 600010 Brighton Reiki Centre Viaduct Road, Brighton 07968 982136 Cheetahs Boxing Gym Next King Alfred Centre, Kings Way, Hove. 01273 206644 Coast Chiropractic 198 Church Road, Hove, 01273 321144 Coral Health And Fitness Orchard Road, Hove 01273 731262 Cornerstone Community Centre Church Road, Hove The Dance Station Unit 4, 57 North Street, Portslade. 01273 419977 Davigdor Infants School Somerhill Road, Hove Bernie: 07799 097776 Dean’s Leisure Centre Longhill School Karen: 01273 305827 The Dharma School Ladies Mile Road, Patcham Diamond Way Buddhist Centre Montpelier Road, Brighton Ingrid: 07736 061108 Dorothy Stringer Sports Complex Loder Road, B’tn. Info on 07895 066321. Fitforall Unit 1, Portland Road Trading Estate, Hove, 01273 415515 Holistic Health Clinic 53 Beaconsfield Rd, Brighton 01273 696295 Johnson Page Healthcare Chiropractic & Medical Acupuncture, 15 Ship Street 01273 724777 King Alfred Leisure Centre Kingsway, Hove, 01273 290290 Komaja Centre 21a Upper Market Street, Hove. Cela: 01273 771472 Leach Court Eastern Road, Brighton. Ian Kendall: 07900 193230 More Bar/Restaurant 98 Trafalger Street, Brighton 07717 584738 Patcham Community Centre Ladies Mile Road, Patcham Peacehaven Leisure Centre Greenwich Way, Peacehaven, East Sussex 01273 588858 Revitalise (Planet Janet) 86 Church Road, Hove 01273 738389 St Mary Magdalen Community Centre 55 Upper North St, Brighton, 01273 676992 Unit 4 20–26 Roundhill St, Brighton Wendy Whatling School of Dance Unit 11a Dyke Road Mews, Brighton. wendywhat ling@btconnect.com List for FREE in this section. Email health events to editorial@thelatest.co.uk with the date, place, time and cost
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ANDREW KAY’S FOOD&DRINK
Snails ace Andrew Kay misses Hibiscus but finds The Bell Inn at Yarpole April the first always heralds the start of the camping season for me and my friends. Yes I know it is also all fool’s day, and yes, it can be foolish pitching canvas when temperatures can swoop to below zero in the space of a few hours. Still, we are hardy beasts and never say never. Which is how we found ourselves in a lovely site called Radnor’s End in Hay-on-Wye. Six days in Hay need careful planning. You need things to do outside the town otherwise you get book-logged. On our last visit I made a booking at Hibiscus in Ludlow, a two-Michelin-starred restaurant run by chef Claude Bosi. I reviewed it on these pages and it was a memorable meal. Well, why not go back I thought, so I Googled, got their website up and to my horror discovered that the day we planned to go was in fact their last day before moving the whole shebang to Mayfair, London. Ludlow’s loss is the capital’s gain. Needless to say I was disappointed, that is until I clicked on a link to The Bell Inn at Yarpole. It seems that Claude and his wife have bought a pub, installed his frère Cedric to manage it, and kept an interest locally. Yarpole is midway between Leominster and Ludlow and within easy reach of Hay. I persuaded the team that it might be fun. My brother and his wife-to-be joined us and we set off in their Bongo – don’t ask, it’s some surfy thing.
Sponsored by Others indulged in steak topped with Welsh rarebit, and a variety of fish and meat dishes. I’m afraid that I was rather taken away by my bean and meat bonanza. Puds were good and traditional – sticky toffee pudding making a big hit. I was wooed by a rhubarb trifle. I love rhubarb in any form, from the big, fat, dark red stalks of the main season to the pale pink, forced, early variety. This was pale and forced, perhaps a little too forced. Delicious yes but not exactly trifle as there was cream but no custard. It was a good pudding but by definition it missed the mark by a mere trifle, the lack of crème Anglaise monsieur. What impressed us most was the quality of the cooking, the smart service and above all the prices. Once again a top-ranking chef of international repute has put his name and his money behind a pub that serves food of outstanding quality and pedigree for the same prices, or perhaps a trifle more, than your average pub grub. It would seem to me that we are losing a grasp of the concept of expensive. I know a few heads will turn when I say that our lunch cost £30 a head plus drinks. But that was £30 for excellently-cooked, expertly and conscientiously sourced quality dining. We all had three courses and two of us shared a fourth. I have eaten food that I paid far less for than this but consider to be far more expensive. More expensive because it was not good. I would rather eat once a month in pubs like The Bell Inn, The Hind’s Head and The Griffin, than spend less more often. Let me eat well and hang the expense. The Bell Inn, Green Lane, Yarpole, Herefordshire, 01568 780359, www.thebellinnyarpole.co.uk
Passionate about property, fanatical about food 59 Church Road, Hove 01273 735237 www.callaways.co.uk
“At Hibiscus the emphasis was on invention and innovation, here it was on tradition” The Bell Inn was picture-book pretty and as unpretentious a pub as I could have hoped for. We had a drink in the pretty gardens before going in to have lunch, tasting a variety of local beers between us. Inside I changed our table from the restaurant to the bar so that we did not have to leave our dog in the car. The weather had taken an unseasonal swoop into the 20s and it was baking hot. At Hibiscus the emphasis was on invention and innovation, here it was on tradition. I started with a smoked haddock and leek fishcake which came in a bowl of pea broth with crushed peas. It was divine, soft in texture and taste, no saltiness at all and just the right size, not a baby portion but not too big either. Others indulged in twice-baked cheese soufflé. I snaffled a bit and have to say it was as light as a feather, not easy in a twice-baked soufflé. I also managed to persuade the assembled to order an extra dish of snails sourced form a nearby snail farm. I love them but found only one person who actually wanted to join in with eating them. They are so pretty in their stripy golden shells and these were tender as could be, taking their final slither in a slick of garlicky butter. They came with a big green salad full of punch, with an excellent dressing too, and we all tucked into good white bread and very good butter. For my main course I chose cassoulet. Because the kitchen’s influences are classic French I thought it worth the risk. It was a risk that paid off. I have no idea how authentic it was, nor do I care. Ask anyone to define cassoulet and it will be different form the next person’s definition. This had succulent beans, hunks of belly pork, Toulouse sausage and a sprinkling of breadcrumbs. It was unctuous and sticky.
New Exciting Menus Dinner Menu (3 course) £25.00 Sunday to Thursday 6pm till close ~~~~~
Lunch Menu (2 course) £11.95 Sunday to Friday 12pm to 5pm Or choose from our à la Carte menu ~~~~~ Please visit our web site to view menus
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FOOD & DRINK
latest hot
Sevendials Restaurant
INDIAN Nooris Indian Cuisine One of Brighton’s longest-standing Indian restaurants and justifiably so. Smart service and a menu that, as well as offering all our favourite dishes, has some interesting and unusual dishes on offer. Great central location just off the seafront. Portions are on the very generous side so order carefully. We have always been particularly impressed by the vegetarian menu, especially the malai kupta. Excellent breads and side dishes too. £6.95 for a twocourse meal and £11.95 for a three-course meal with wine. 70 Ship Street, Brighton 01273 329405
LIST RESTAURANTS & BARS
RESTAURANTS
ITALIAN Donatello
BRITISH AND MODERN EUROPEAN Bardsley’s Probably Brighton’s most popular fish and chip shop and restaurant with a large loyal clientele. Totally traditional and family-run with all your favourites, but also an excellent blackboard of daily fish specials. They’re open for lunch and dinner Tuesday to Saturday and it’s also a great party venue. There are massive fish platters and good seasonal seafood. Fish can be fried, grilled or poached, plus vegetarian choices. 22–23a Baker Street, Brighton, 01273 681256
Blanch House The restaurant at Blanch House is an inhouse affair. All involved are dedicated to excellence in food, service and wines but with no pretensions. You can sit back and take pleasure in the relaxed atmosphere of dinner at your best friend’s house while enjoying innovative food, attentive and personal service, and superb wine and cocktail lists. The menu changes with the seasons and availability to ensure that only the freshest high-quality produce is used. Meat, dairy products and other ingredients are locally sourced and organic where possible. Fish is from the local day boats when available. 17 Atlingworth Street, Brighton, 01273 603504, www.blanchhouse.co.uk
Café Belge Café Belge offers award-winning food (Café Belge Eastbourne received a gold star for food from the prestigious Harden’s Guide 2006) – 50 ways to eat a fresh mussel, salmon fishcakes, award-winning 12” wild boar and beer sausage, fresh sea bass, steak Béarnaise, Toblerone fondue, Belgian waffles – just to give you an insight into what to expect. They also stock more than 100 beers all served in their own glasses, from light and delicious fruit beers to Trapist Monk beers to Belgian Guinness as well as a fine wine list. 64 Kings Rd (corner of West St & seafront), 01273 733290, www.cafebelge.co.uk
The Coach House Friendly restaurant bar in the city centre serving an excellent range of hearty homecooked food, separate evening and lunch menus, and always a selection of roasts on Sunday. Great mussels, steaks, soups and a good wine list. In the winter a central open fire roars, in summer people soak up the late sun on the pretty terrace. The warm atmosphere and good value pricing make this a popular local haunt. 59 Middle Street, Brighton, 01273 719000 www.coachhousebrighton.com
The Gourmet Fish & Chip Company The Gourmet Fish and Chip Company at Brighton Marina has taken the dish into the 21st century. Diners can enjoy fantastic top-grade fish and chips in a trendy diner environment and even enjoy a beer while they wait for their takeaway order. Check out the gourmet fish platter and lunch-time specials. The restaurant is located on the ground-floor level of the waterfront and is open seven days a week. Fully licensed. The Walk of Fame, 18 Waterfront, Brighton Marina, 01273 670701 www.gourmetfishandchipcompany.com
New Steine Bistro Cosy French bistro with regular art exhibitions creating the perfect setting for the appreciation of traditional homemade French cuisine either with friends or for a romantic night out. A hidden gem in the heart of Kemp Town, and very reasonable too! With its daily evening menu at £10.50 weekdays and £14.50 Friday and Saturday. A la carte menu Tuesday to Saturday 6pm to 10pm for last orders. Available for all celebrations and party bookings with tailormade menu to your needs including live entertainment. 12a New Steine, Brighton, 01273 681546 reservation@newsteinehotel.com www.newsteinehotel.com
Polar Bar East The Polar East is pleased to introduce the new spring/summer menu. Freshly cooked British and European food using locally sourced produce. Great local atmosphere. Beer garden with barbecue. Main meals from £3. All meat is supplied by Brampton's Premium Butchers. 8 St George’s Road, Kemp Town, Brighton, 01273 683334
Ruby Tate’s Situated at the heart of cosmopolitan Kemp Town, Ruby Tate’s oyster and champagne bar really is the pearl of Brighton. From moules marinière to lobster Thermidor, this is a paradise for seafood lovers. The restaurant’s stylish décor and trademark friendly service ensure that diners enjoy the gourmet food and fine champagne in a relaxed, informal atmosphere. 40 St James’s Street, Brighton, 01273 693251
Sevendials Restaurant A smart restaurant in so many ways, excellent food and a sensible variety of menus in chic surroundings. Chef Sam runs a team of food-lovers who deliver time after time, from a simple lunch to a full à la carte dinner. Cooking reflects the seasons rather than fashion, and quality is paramount, with great locally caught fish, game in season and desserts that are a delight plus a wine list that is full of treats without being expensive too. Make the most of the terrace while the weather is warm or the private dining room for a treat. 1 Buckingham Place, Brighton, 01273 885555 www.sevendialsrestaurant.co.uk
The Terraces Bar, Grill and Dining Room Terraces bar and grill offers customers a relaxed approach to drinking, eating and hospitality. The lower level is available for private parties, wedding receptions, corporate events, Christmas parties, formal dinners or product launches. Whatever you want, you can be sure of an experience as consistently satisfying as the breathtaking views across Brighton seafront. Madeira Drive, Brighton, 01273 570526, www.the-terraces.co.uk
GREEK Symposio Greek Taverna In a city with very few Greek eateries it’s great to find somewhere warm and inviting to indulge in some Greek food. From magnificent mezze to classic grilled meats, Symposio has a great taverna atmosphere and the lively style of the venue adds a great ambience to what can be a terrific party venue. Also fabulous for a romantic dinner, family outing or business meal. The moussaka is a must and also the deep red wine-soaked sausages and crisp calamari. 121 Western Road, Hove 01273 779474 www.ipanemarestaurants.com
The flagship venue of this local family-run business serving excellent-value Italian food in stylish and spotless surroundings. It is popular with locals in the week but at the weekend it draws an audience from London. There are brilliant-value meal deals on blackboards outside – two courses £6.95, three £8.95 – as well as à la carte. The haunt of celebs in season from soap stars to politicos. Fun, friendly and fabulous value. Brighton Place, Brighton, 01273 775477, www.donatello.co.uk
Fat Leo Supposedly the budget branch of the Donatello stable but you’d be hard-pressed to see why. Once again, quality family dining in the Italian mould but a little less expensive. Very popular with students and families with young children, Fat Leo has trendy interiors, including the toilets, and a menu that is utterly affordable with the company’s signature set-price boards proclaiming any two courses £5.95, any three courses £7.95. 16–17 Market Street, Brighton, 01273 325135
LATIN AMERICAN Las Iguanas Brazilian cooking has come to town and with it all the fun of the caipirinha. Spicy, fun and inexpensive, this Latin newcomer is already proving popular, especially the two-for-one cocktail deals and an excellent £7 two-course lunch menu. Whacky interiors and a cool cocktail bar give the place a carnival feel all the time and the staff are friendly and fun too. If you don’t know what cachaca is, then it’s time to find out. 7–8 Jubilee Street, Brighton, 01273 573550, www.iguanas.co.uk
SOUTH EAST ASIAN Bali Brasserie Located in a 1960s mansion block, this very popular Indonesian-Malaysian restaurant has a rijsttafel buffet dining menu at £16.95 with a wide and generous range of dishes that are constantly replenished. There is also an à la carte menu. Nice original retro décor, bamboo and cane, pink and gilt, with lots of oriental puppets, jazz playing and a friendly atmosphere. Very Simon Templar. Kingsway Court, First Avenue, Hove, 01273 323810, 12-2pm, 6.30-10.30pm (till 11pm Friday and Saturday)
To have an entry in the latest hot list call 01273 818150 34 latest 7
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FOOD & DRINK SPANISH La Tapa De Oro This large upper room is home to great and authentic Spanish cooking. Tapas has been trendy for years but here the emphasis is on real Iberian food. Favourites include sweet slices of octopus on boiled potato slices dressed with olive oil, lovely ensalad Russe and great jamon Serrano. Informal and friendly, this is a great place for a romantic dinner, family outing, business meal or party. 123 Western Road, Hove 01273 779474 www.ipanemarestaurants.com
THAI Chokdee Possibly the first of its kind, this premium take-away offers fantastic-quality Thai food to your door if you use the home-delivery service or to take away if you are passing. You can eat in too, as there is a stylish dining area. Counter service does away with additional service charges, so you can enjoy Thai food as often as you like without the fuss. At Chokdee it’s the food that’s the thing. Foodies – start the queue! 98 Goldstone Villas, Hove, 01273 720370, open every day (12pm–3pm and 5pm–11pm)
Sawadee The Thai restaurant that people love, for parties and celebrations, and because they always give the best of times. And why not; this well-priced restaurant pleases repeatedly with dishes we have all grown to love, and some new ones too. We were impressed by the use of authentic ingredients, such as pea aubergines where others use peas. Lots of fish dishes too with bass and pomfret and a great sliced beef salad. 87 St James’s Street, Brighton, 01273 624233, www.sawadeethai.co.uk
VEGETARIAN Revitalise (formerly Planet Janet) This popular and stylish Hove café restaurant offers delicious healthy hot and cold food in combination with being an excellent centre for therapies, treatments and classes. Healthy breakfasts, chunky sandwiches, soups, main meals, jacket potatoes and salads form the core of the menu. Freshly pressed fruit and vegetable juices in delicious revitalising combos, delicious fair-trade teas and coffee, vegan and gluten-free options. Open seven days a week, families welcome. You can eat for less than a fiver! 86 Church Road, Hove, 01273 738389, www.revitalise-u.com
BARS & PUBS The Bell
The award-winning cocktail bar is located on the ground floor of the five-storey building and offers an eclectic range of superbly made cocktails. The owner, Chris Edwardes, has managed many renowned bars, restaurants and clubs in London, including the Groucho Club, The Pharmacy, as well as opening the Jazz Café, The Atlantic, and the Ge Club for Conran. His cocktail skills have been described as ’legendary’ by those in the know and with over 30 years’ experience in the industry it was only a matter of time before he opened his own quality venue. 17 Atlingworth Street, Brighton, 01273 603504, www.blanchhouse.co.uk
The Eagle Great atmosphere, warm welcome, good beer and above all, great food from this gastropub. Hearty, modern food inspired by global cuisine and sensibly priced – you won’t go home hungry or broke. Right in the heart of the North Laine, an excellent place for lunch or dinner. Voted Latest 7 Pub Of The Year. 125 Gloucester Road, Brighton, 01273 607765
GinGin Sophisticated cocktail chic at this stylish St James’s Street bar. Try one of the head barman’s innovative cocktails using unusual mixes and fresh herbs. Cool interiors and a warm and friendly atmosphere which, for once in a city that worships youth, is not ageist. St James’s Street, Kemp Town, Brighton, 01273 671119
The Hop Poles Great central pub with off-the-wall décor and a loyal clientele of the city’s fashionable best. A fantastic menu of wellpriced food means it gets very busy and seats are at a premium, even in winter on the heated terrace, so get there early. Excellent free-range meat is specially sourced, while vegetarians are well catered for too. 13 Middle Street, Brighton, 01273 710444
Koba Koba hosts a happy hour between 5pm and 7pm all week. Three bars over three floors with a dedicated team of mixologists. This venue stands as a flagship of quality in Brighton and has been nominated in the top ten bars/clubs in the UK by The Independent. Good beers, a sensible wine list and, of course, champagne for those special occasions or just the sheer love of it. The perfect venue for a private party or an atmospheric night out. Live music on Thursdays, DJs on the weekend. For free K-list membership go to the website. 135 Western Road, Brighton, 01273 720059, www.kobauk.com
Preston Park Tavern This stunning new gastro-pub is situated on Havelock Road in Fiveways. Fresh, locally sourced food is served seven days a week from the open-plan kitchen. A separate children’s menu is available in this totally non-smoking venue. It boasts a great range of real ales and lagers as well as a 17 bin wine list, all served by the glass or bottle. 88 Havelock Road, Brighton, 01273 542271
What’s cooking this week? Quick Low-Carb: 60 Recipes For A Healthy Fuss-Free Diet Elaine Gardner As each of our lifestyles differ, there is no fixed weight-loss plan to suit all. A few weeks back, this column was devoted to the GL diet and now we have jumped to low-carbohydrate recipe ideas. Before starting a low-carb eating plan, it is important to justify your reasons for doing so, and this is stressed in Elaine Gardner’s new book. Realistic targets should be set and potential barriers acknowledged. A food and feelings chart is also recommended, as keeping a log of food consumed and your feelings at the time can be extremely enlightening. Feelings of boredom and tiredness are all factors when deciding to reach for easily-accessible sugary snacks like chocolate bars. However, Quick Low-Carb offers advice to help banish this habit. By opting for protein-rich, low-carb foods, energy levels are sustained and the carbs keep you filled for longer, meaning you feel less like snacking between meals. It’s not an easy journey, and doesn’t pretend to be one. Instead, Gardner asks us to set achievable goals that result in a healthier lifestyle. The low-carb recipe plan goes hand-in-hand with plenty of exercise, and even though a number of foods are restricted in this eating plan, motivation and sensible eating can make lasting results beneficial to our health. Zara Friend
Chicken with Serrano ham Ingredients 4 skinless, boneless chicken breast portions 4 slices Serrano ham 40g/11⁄2oz/3tbsp butter 30ml/2tbsp chopped capers
30ml/2tbsp fresh thyme leaves 1 large lemon, cut lengthways into 8 slices A few small fresh thyme sprigs Salt and ground black pepper Serves 4
1. Preheat the oven to 200°C/400°F/Gas 6. Wrap each chicken breast in clear film (plastic wrap) and beat with a rolling pin until flattened. Unwrap the chicken breast portions and arrange in a single layer in a large, shallow ovenproof dish. Top each piece of chicken with a slice of Serrano ham. 2. In a bowl, beat the butter with the capers, thyme and seasoning. Divide the butter into quarters and shape neat portions, then place on each ham-topped chicken breast portion. Arrange two lemon slices on the butter and sprinkle with thyme sprigs. Bake for 25 minutes, or until the chicken is cooked through. 3. Transfer the chicken portions to a warmed serving platter or four plates and spoon the piquant, buttery juices over the top. Serve immediately, removing the lemon slices first, if you prefer. For a wellbalanced meal serve with a large mixed green leaf and herb salad. Cook’s tip: This dish is just as good with other thinly-sliced cured ham, such as prosciutto, in place of the Serrano ham. Quick Low-Carb, 60 Recipes For A Healthy Fuss-Free Diet, by Elaine Gardner, is out now published by Southwater Books, £8.99, ISBN-978--84476-402-0 Image: Southwater Books
This friendly, traditional pub reopened its doors at the end of last year after having undergone extensive refurbishment and is now under new ownership. Tucked away off Blatchington Road, it already has a name for itself for its great value food, freshly made every day from locally sourced products, including fantastic roasts on Sundays. The pub is child friendly and there’s often something extra going on, from quiz nights to live music. There’s also a function room available to hire and happy hours every Monday to Friday from 4-7pm. 15-17 Belfast Street, Hove, 01273 770773
Blanch House
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FILM www.odeon.co.uk
0871 224 4007 Tuesday 1 ALPHA DOG (15) 3.15, 6.00, 8.45 BLADES OF GLORY (12A) 2.00, 4.15, 6.45, 9.00 CURSE OF THE GOLDEN FLOWER (15) 8.00 FRACTURE (15) 2.45, 5.30, 8.30 NEXT (12A) 1.15, 3.30, 6.00, 8.30 MR BEAN’S HOLIDAY (PG) 1.15, 3.30, 5.50 SUNSHINE (15) 3.00, 5.45, 8.15 THE PAINTED VEIL (12A) 3.00, 6.00, 8.45 WILD HOGS (12A) 1.00, 3.30, 6.00 DIRECTOR’S CHAIR: BABEL (15) 8.35
Wednesday 2 ALPHA DOG (15) 3.15, 6.00, 8.45 BLADES OF GLORY (12A) 2.00, 4.15, 6.45, 9.00 CURSE OF THE GOLDEN FLOWER (15) 8.00 FRACTURE (15) 2.45, 5.30, 8.30 NEXT (12A) 1.15, 3.30, 6.00, 8.30 MR BEAN’S HOLIDAY (PG) 1.15, 3.30, 5.50 SUNSHINE (15) 3.00, 5.45, 8.15 THE PAINTED VEIL (12A) 3.00, 6.00, 8.45 WILD HOGS (12A) 1.00, 3.30, 8.35
MR BEAN’S HOLIDAY (PG) 1.15, 3.30, 5.50 SUNSHINE (15) 3.00, 5.45, 8.15 THE PAINTED VEIL (12A) 3.00, 6.00, 8.45 WILD HOGS (12A) 1.00, 3.30, 6.00, 8.35 SENIOR SCREEN: CASINO ROYALE (12A) 10.30am
Films showing Friday 4–Monday 7 ALPHA DOG (15) BLADES OF GLORY (12A) CURSE OF THE GOLDEN FLOWER (15) FRACTURE (15) NEXT (12A) MR BEAN’S HOLIDAY (PG) SPIDER-MAN 3 (12A) SUNSHINE (15) THE PAINTED VEIL (12A) WILD HOGS (12A) PLEASE CHECK WITH CINEMA BEFORE TRAVELLING
Thursday 3 ALPHA DOG (15) 3.15, 6.00, 8.45 BLADES OF GLORY (12A) 2.00, 4.15, 6.45, 9.00 CURSE OF THE GOLDEN FLOWER (15) 8.00 FRACTURE (15) 2.45, 5.30, 8.30 NEXT (12A) 1.15, 3.30, 6.00, 8.30
www.picturehouses.co.uk
01273 626261 Tuesday 1
Saturday 5
CURSE OF THE GOLDEN FLOWER (15) 1.00, 6.000 THIS IS ENGLAND (18) 3.30, 9.00
DANS PARIS (15) 4.00, 9.00 THIS IS ENGLAND (18) 1.30, 6.30 KID’S CLUB: THE REEF (U) 11.00am
Wednesday 2
Sunday 6
CURSE OF THE GOLDEN FLOWER (15) 1.30, 6.30 THIS IS ENGLAND (18) 11.00, 4.00, 9.30
Thursday 3 CURSE OF THE GOLDEN FLOWER (15) 1.00, 6.000 THIS IS ENGLAND (18) 3.30, 9.00
Friday 4 DANS PARIS (15) 3.30 THIS IS ENGLAND (18) 1.00, 6.00
DANS PARIS (15) 4.00, 9.00 THIS IS ENGLAND (18) 1.30, 6.30
Monday 7 DANS PARIS (15) 4.00, 9.00 THIS IS ENGLAND (18) 1.30, 6.30
www.cineworld.co.uk
BLADES OF GLORY (12A) 1.50, 4.00, 6.20, 8.50 FRACTURE (15) 1.20, 3.50, 6.30, 9.10 LITTLE MISS SUNSHINE (15) 11.00am MR BEAN’S HOLIDAY (PG) 12.50, 3.20, 6.00, 8.20 NEXT (12A) 11.50, 2.20, 4.40, 7.00, 9.20 THIS IS ENGLAND (18) 1.00, 3.30, 6.10, 8.40 THE PAINTED VEIL (12A) 12.20, 3.00, 5.50, 8.30 THE REAPING (15) 12.10, 2.40, 5.00, 7.15, 9.30 WILD HOGS (12A) 11.40, 2.00, 4.20, 6.40, 9.00
Wednesday 2
THE PAINTED VEIL (12A) 12.20, 3.00, 5.50, 8.30 THE REAPING (15) 12.10, 2.40, 5.00, 7.15, 9.30 WILD HOGS (12A) 11.40, 2.00, 4.20, 6.40, 9.00
Films showing Friday 4–Monday 7 BLADES OF GLORY (12A) FRACTURE (15) MR BEAN’S HOLIDAY (PG) NEXT (12A) SPIDER-MAN 3 (12A) THIS IS ENGLAND (18) THE PAINTED VEIL (12A) THE REAPING (15) WILD HOGS (12A) PLEASE CHECK WITH CINEMA BEFORE TRAVELLING
BLADES OF GLORY (12A) 1.50, 4.00, 6.20, 8.50 FRACTURE (15) 1.20, 3.50, 6.30, 9.10 MR BEAN’S HOLIDAY (PG) 12.50, 3.20, 6.00, 8.20 NEXT (12A) 11.50, 2.20, 4.40, 7.00, 9.20 THIS IS ENGLAND (18) 1.00, 3.30, 6.10, 8.40 THE PAINTED VEIL (12A) 12.20, 3.00, 8.30 THE REAPING (15) 12.10, 2.40, 5.00, 7.15, 9.30 WILD HOGS (12A) 11.40, 2.00, 4.20, 6.40, 9.00
Thursday 3 BLADES OF GLORY (12A) 1.50, 4.00, 6.20, 8.50 FRACTURE (15) 1.20, 3.50, 6.30, 9.10 MR BEAN’S HOLIDAY (PG) 12.50, 3.20, 6.00, 8.20 NEXT (12A) 11.50, 2.20, 4.40, 7.00, 9.20 THIS IS ENGLAND (18) 1.00, 3.30, 6.10, 8.40
Worthing Cinema
Friday 4–Monday 7
01903 206206 www.worthingtheatres.co.uk please call for times
SPIDER-MAN 3 (12A)
Tuesday 1–Thursday 3
NORBIT (12A)
300 (15)
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A quick look at all this week’s releases 300 (15) Dir: Zack Snyder Based on Frank Miller’s graphic comic 300 concerns the 480 BC Battle of Thermopylae in which 300 Spartans fought against a 100,000-strong Persian army. Pure protofascism mixed in with a sweaty dollop of homoeroticism. (3/5) Showing at Worthing Alpha Dog (15) Dir: Nick Cassavetes A dire but finely polished thriller, this new film from Cassavetes, son of infamous cult director John, documents the life and crimes of Jesse James Hollywood, the youngest person ever to be on the FBI most-wanted list. Justin Timberlake stars alongside Bruce Willis in this grimy pimped-out indulgence. (2/5) Showing at Odeon Babel (15) Dir: Alejandro González Iñárritu This hugely ambitious film sees Iñárritu complete a trilogy of sorts after the success of Amores Perros and 21 Grams. This time four different stories impact unwittingly on each other across three different continents. Brad Pitt and Cate Blanchett star as a couple trying to escape their past and the always brilliant Gael García Bernal makes a small but thrilling entrance. A superb film with a refreshingly international pedigree. (4/5) Showing at Odeon Blades Of Glory (12A) Dir: Josh Gordon and Will Speck This farcical comedy based around the theatrics and camp wonder of professional figure skating stars Will Ferrell and Jon Heder. After being banned from the sport Olympic rivals Ferrell and Heder team up as the first all-male duo. Inevitably madness, mishaps and general silliness ensue. (4/5) Showing at Cineworld and Odeon
PLEASE CHECK WITH CINEMA BEFORE TRAVELLING
01273 818094 Tuesday 1
Also showing...
Sunday 6–Monday 7 PLEASE CHECK WITH CINEMA BEFORE TRAVELLING
Casino Royale (12A) Dir: Martin Campbell Bond gets re-branded in this high octane and bullish instalment. Daniel Craig makes a devastating Bond who is not only believable in his macho swagger but also genuinely human. This is Bond with his licence to thrill fully reinstated. (4/5) Showing at Odeon Curse Of The Golden Flower (15) Dir: Zhang Yimou Set in 10th century China, on the eve of the Chong Yang Festival, this is epic melodrama at its most ornate and indulgent. The most expensive film ever to come out of China, the grandiose theatrics on display may be impressive but they cloud the narrative. (3/5) Showing at Odeon
know but when a film is this delightfully funny and bitter sweet who cares? (5/5) Showing at Cineworld Mr Bean’s Holiday (PG) Dir: Steve Bendelack Mr Bean returns with his goofy ways as he travels to the south of France. Traditional British slapstick fun as Mr Bean’s video diaries accidentally get a gala screening at the Cannes Film Festival. Silly for sure but Rowan Atkinson has the mildly autistic Bean down to a tee. (2/5) Showing at Cineworld and Odeon Norbit (12A) Dir: Brian Robbins Eddie Murphy dons the fat suit once again in this utterly derisive tale of a geek juggling relationships and women. Rumoured to be the sole reason that Eddie Murphy failed to win Best Supporting Actor at this year’s Oscars for his role in Dreamgirls, Norbit truly does deliver wave after wave of utterly debased humour and cheesy melodrama. (1/5) Showing at Worthing Sunshine (15) Dir: Danny Boyle Set 50 years into the future, this sci-fi epic sees Danny Boyle resurrect a genre that hasn’t been at full strength since the heady days of Alien or Outlander. Boyle regular Cillian Murphy heads an international cast that also includes Michelle Yeoh, Hiroyuki Sanada, Rose Byrne, and Chris Evans. While the effects are outstanding and the performances good the general confusion that reigns throughout serves to make the film more of a stunning mess than a true successor to James Cameron’s classic Aliens. (3/5) Showing at Odeon The Reef (U) Dir: Howard E. Baker and John Fox When a film can only boast the vocal talents of human turd Freddie Prinze Jr, and super twit Rob Schneider you know it’s going to be a hard sell. This animated kiddies flick is a cheap and tacky rip off of Shark Tale and that film was already dire. Please avoid and go and watch any Pixar production instead. As one reviewer on the internet so deftly put it this is “utter carp”. (3/5) Showing at Duke Of York’s
Fracture (15) Dir: Gregory Hoblit An early contender for worst film of the year this insipid thriller finds Anthony Hopkins as a businessman turned killer pitted in a battle of wills and intellect against the assistant DA played by the usually dependable Ryan Gosling. The script is flat as are the performances. (1/5) Showing at Cineworld and Odeon
This Is England (18) Dir: Shane Meadows Without doubt the best British film of the last few years, this follow-up to the equally excellent Dead Man’s Shoes finds director Shane Meadows hitting his stride with confidence. A partly biographical tale of Meadows’ own life growing up in the 80s, the film follows young ruffian Shaun as he struggles to deal with growing up and the loss of his father in the Falklands War. When a group of loveable skinheads take him under their wing his life picks up only for it to crash again when racism rears its ugly head. Thomas Turgoose as Shaun is terrific as is the film. This is British cinema not afraid to be authentic and classy without resorting to Richard Curtis stereotypes or melodrama. (5/5) Showing at Cineworld and Duke of York’s
Little Miss Sunshine (15) Dir: Jonathan Dayton and Valerie Faris This wonderful little gem of a film was the surprise hit of last year and on a second viewing it’s easy to see why. Telling the story of a family in strife as they travel across the USA in an attempt to enter their daughter into a beauty pageant this is classic road movie stuff. Alan Arkin deservedly won the Oscar for his role as the heroin-addled grandfather but it’s Abigail Breslin as the daughter Olive who steals the show as well our hearts. Cliched I
Wild Hogs (12A) Dir: Walt Becker Defiantly oddball cinema with John Travolta, Tim Allen, William H Macy, and Martin Lawrence. This is a somewhat acquired taste and hits just as often as it misses in its defiantly eccentric meandering. Ray Liotta makes a welcome addition as an irate biker but the film never quite recovers from the shock of John Travolta’s ever-increasing waistline. (2/5) Showing at Cineworld and Odeon
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L7 lowdown New releases reviewed
7 Selects
Spider-Man 3 (12A) Director Sam Raimi The greatest superhero franchise is back in this third instalment. Tobey Maguire stars again as the webslinger, balancing heroic achievements with personal strife. This time around the seeming peace and quiet of Parker’s romance with Mary Jane is upset by the arrival of an evil entity from space which takes the form of Venom. In addition, Spiderman also has to grapple with new villains Sandman and the new Green Goblin. Once again the Spidey brand succeeds where others have failed due to a tight script, genuine tension, and Raimi’s deft eye for a visual spectacle. Craig Driver Showing at Cineworld, Odeon and Worthing
The Painted Veil (12A)
Dans Paris (15)
Director Christophe Honoré This gallic tale of love, loss and depression might sound like a miserable experience but the lightness of touch and ingenuity of Honoré raises it above the misery. After the deeply amoral wonder of Ma Mère this is a more vital and vibrant effort that defies traditional notions of European cinema in favour of a style more akin with newwave auteurs such as Godard and Truffaut. The sad tale of a young man who slips into depression after splitting up with his girlfriend is deftly balanced with a strong and urgent visual style. Romain Duris as the young man battling depression gives a startling and sumptuous performance. Showing at Duke of York’s
Next (12A)
Director Lee Tamahori Nicholas Cage returns in this implausible but enjoyable action romp. Cage plays a Las Vegas magician, Cris Johnson, who is cursed by an ability to see minutes into the future. Hiding away from the world, Cris and his unique talents are needed when a terrorist group threatens Los Angeles. The always dependable Julianne Moore co-stars as does the curvaceous Jessica Biel. The premise may be daft and the script occasionally trite but this is standard blockbuster fare centred around a highly implausible conceit. Showing at Cineworld and Odeon
Director John Curran Based on the novel by W Somerset Maugham, The Painted Veil is a tale of love and redemption set in the 1920s that tells the story of a young couple – Walter (Edward Norton), a middle-class doctor and Kitty (Naomi Watts), an upper-class woman – who get hitched for the wrong reasons and relocate to Shanghai, where she falls in love with someone else. It may sound trite and indeed, at times the oh-so-irksome melodrama reeks, but the visuals and locations are stunning. Norton, usually so thrilling, tones it down in the name of sentiment while Watts delivers a suitably reserved performance. It won a Golden Globe but so did Out Of Africa and that was dull too. Showing at Cineworld and Odeon
And finally… Craig Driver takes a look at the upcoming Final Cut Screenings taking place at the Brighton Festival This May sees the return of the excellent arts extravaganza that is the Brighton Festival. Nestled deep in the bosom of the festival is the annual series of film screenings hosted by Brighton’s very own short film exhibitors Final Cut. Brighton’s Final Cut is one of the UK’s most successful short-film screening groups and with over 80 films showing at different venues around the city over the next month, its sixth festival campaign is set to be the biggest ever. Festival highlights include the opening-night gala at the Sussex Arts Club on 5 May at which Final Cut will be launching their third DVD. With a host of the best films that Final Cut have screened over the past year this kicks off with a packed programme of brand-new UK and international shorts, including several award winners and UK premieres. The evening also includes live DJ mixes and film-themed VJ sets, as well as an open bar. On Sunday 20 May Final Cut host a US Indie Night suitably entitled East Meets West (Coast) at the Ocean Rooms. With all the grit and glamour of the New York, Los Angeles and San Francisco independent film scenes, this event promises to highlight the best short films from across the pond plus a collection of micro-docs from US video-bloggers. With a guest DJ spinning a unique East-West mix of US hits from the 1940s to the present day and free entry to the club after, you have a guaranteed Fringe night out to remember. On Sunday 13 May, Final Cut hosts the much more locally based Spotlight South East at the Po Na Na Club. With brand-new shorts from local film-makers plus the latest ‘Trailer Trash’ previews this event shows Final Cut to be a vital supporter of Sussex film-makers. The exciting collection of top-quality films features brand-new dramas, comedies, documentaries, animation, and music videos. Finishing off the month, Final Cut host their Last Night Extravaganza on Sunday 27 May once again at the Po Na Na Club. This last-night event promises an unpredictable mix of live performances, great films, ultra-shorts, left-field music videos and unclassifiable weird stuff, alongside film-themed VJ-DJ sets. In addition, the internationally renowned Paris-based Qwartz Music Festival have given Final Cut exclusive permission to screen their cuttingedge music videos during the festival, and will be providing top French electro act Cocoon to Brighton for a special one-off live performance. With another thrilling display of the obscure and wild as well as local film talent, this years Final Cut screening events promise to be an integral part of the 2007 Brighton Festival. For information and tickets see www.brightonfestivalfringe.org.uk
The Reaping (15) Director Stephen Hopkins This generic but decidedly worthy film follows a former Christian missionary (an overly serious Hilary Swank), who specialises in debunking religious phenomena, as she investigates a town cursed by the ten biblical plagues. Cue special effects as rivers turn to blood and locusts descend from the sky. The production values are low and the script, often weighed down by religious dogma, is banal at best. Swank delivers a mediocre performance in a film that falters under an absurd central premise. Showing at Cineworld
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THE BIG GIG
THIS WEEK James Burton and Billy Swan Best known for his work as guitarist and band leader for Elvis Presley, his career started even before that when he supplied the classic guitar lines on ‘Suzi Q’ by Dale Hawkins. Subsequent to Presley he has worked with the likes of Gram Parsons, Jerry Lee Lewis, Johnny Cash, Elvis Costello and Emmylou Harris. He’ll be joined by Nashville singersongwriter and producer Billy Swan, who wrote such classics as Clyde McPhatter’s ’Lover Please‘ and ‘I Can Help.’ Friends for many years, this is the first time these two legends have performed together. They will be joined by The Grundy Pritchard Band. Mon 7 May, Concorde 2, Brighton, 01273 673311
Tinariwen Damien Rice Spiritual singer-songwriter, who is capable of writing haunting ballads and beautiful melodies. Sat 14 July, Brighton Dome, 01273 709709
Latest 7’s Top 5 records 1990s Cookies (album Rough Trade) Another band in the seemingly endless queue of new bands who have recently had a good look at their history books, pillaging tunes, attitudes and styles from the golden era of music – the 70s. From Faces-style, bar-room sing-a-longs to late 70s new wave dynamism, what sets this lot apart from the herd is their refusal to capitulate to cheesy parody and blatant plagiarism. There are tunes galore here, a fantastic production sound, and loads of lets-not-take-this-too-seriously attitude. Best of all, 1990s have taken on board their history, and successfully mixed up all those 70s styles into one contemporary-sounding whole.
1
Groove Armada Soundboy Rock (album Columbia) One of the few dance acts that can cut it live, and who continue to make decent club music that works just as well at home. There’s an old-school flavour throughout, with a purposeful move back to the halcyon days.
2
Cinematic Orchestra Ma Fleur (album Ninja Tune) Very downbeat offering from Jason Swinscoe, which was written as a soundtrack to a commissioned screenplay. Sounding (thanks to the vocal talents of Patrick Watson in particular) like Antony and The Johnsons, this is atmospheric and fragile to almost heartbreaking effect.
3
The Bamboos Rawville (album Tru Thoughts) New Zealand vintage funk outfit with elements of hip hop. Seriously grooving à la Quantic Soul Orchestra, with our own Alice Russell guesting on one track.
4
The Wurzels Greatest Hits (album EMI) What more can you say but “oo arr” and “gurt lush”!
5
Hard to tell how much wild fantasy and wishful thinking is mixed in with the known facts of Tinariwen. Made up from the nomadic Touareg people of the Sahara, their story is intertwined with the continuing struggle of these stateless people. The three who make up the core of the band became soldiermusicians, lured to military camps in Libya by Colonel Gaddafi, and whose subsequent discovery of electric guitars formed the basis of their superbly hypnotic desert blues, that at root is an expression of the longing for freedom and peace in their troubled lands. Tues 1 May, Komedia, Brighton, 01273 647100
Lou Rhodes Welcome return to Brighton for this ex-lead singer of Lamb, a band who accumulated a large and fanatical following, and who fell in love with Rhodes’ angelic voice, hippy looks and way of life. With musical partner Andy Barlow they helped to create the soundtrack to the Big Chill generation. Now solo, Rhodes has produced a debut album, Beloved One, which last year was nominated for the Mercury Music Prize and demonstrates her talent for acoustic songwriting. Mon 7 May, Komedia, Brighton, 01273 647100
For music listings see our day-to-day guide starting on page 51 38 latest 7
If you would like your event listed please email listings@thelatest.co.uk
038_039_LS319 music
4/26/07
11:36 AM
Page 3
MUSIC
BRIGHTON SCENE A weekly round-up of what’s happening in the local Brighton and Sussex music scene It’s festival fever this month as the Brighton Festival and Fringe take off at the weekend. It’s your chance, as is the custom, to get stuck into the weird, exotic, unusual, and often wonderful. The month ahead will feature all kinds of musical events that don’t normally get a look in. Check the Fringe programme in particular for some local delights. From brass to recitals, world music to rock, there is a veritable potpourri of idiosyncratic delights just waiting for an audience. It’s a generally slow period, preThe Dials festival, so this week is a quiet one for local gigs. However, do check out The Dials (Fri 5 May, Brunswick), an eccentric and likeable bunch who recently won the Fopp unsigned competition. Expect a rather surreal hybrid of acid country folk, west coast vibes and surf/spag-western instrumentals verging from the Pulp Fictionesque mariachi explosion of ‘Theme From Dials’ to the countryrock Byrds-style ‘Lonely Boy’. It’s ace! On the release front, the Electric Soft Parade are back in action after Electric Soft Parade a hiatus that involved the White Brothers, Tom and Alex, going on a busman’s holiday with The Brakes, where they found further acclaim as the band’s musical driving force. As ESP they’ve been around since the late 90s when, as teenagers, they produced their debut album under the name Feltro Media. Their first album under the Electric Soft Parade moniker saw Holes In The Wall being nominated for the Mercury Music Prize in 2002. Subsequent album The American Adventure was released the following year, and No Need To Be Downhearted represents their first album for four years. Nothing seems to have changed much – they are still an extraordinary musical force, capable of producing consistently interesting, innovative, guitar-driven music that feels like a British version of Grandaddy. In fact, a brilliant album. Chungking are another Brighton band with a strong pedigree and who are back in action with their first release for three years. ‘Love Is Here To Stay’ is released this month, and is the first taster from their new album which will be released in the summer. Showcasing their move in to electro-pop waters, these former psychedelic soul merchants are made up of Jessie Banks and Shaun Hennessey, two genuinely born and bred Brightonians. Their new band includes Hardkandy’s Seany Clarke on bass and vocals. They are also featured on a download-only single along with local soulstress Lisa Lindley-Jones, as part of the on-going Timeless Tracks Remastered series whereby contemporary bands/artists are given the chance to re-interpret classics of yore. In this case Chungking have covered Minnie Riperton’s ‘Les Fleurs’, while Lindley-Jones has plumped for Talking Heads’ ‘Road To Nowhere’. Visit www.ttremastered.com for more info. Send your music and news to Jeff Hemmings, Music Editor, Latest 7, Unit 1, Level 5, New England House, New England Street, Brighton BN1 4GH. Listen to Jeff and guests from the Latest magazine stable on the Latest Live show on Radio Reverb, Mon–Fri, 46pm, 97.2FM or via www.radioreverb.com
latest 7 on the radio Tune into Radio Reverb 97.2FM Mon-Fri, 4-6pm, for the latest music, art, culture, politics, community and entertainment news, with Jeff Hemmings and guests.
If you would like your event listed please email listings@thelatest.co.uk
THE MONTH AHEAD Chris Difford Back in the late 70s and early 80s Chris Difford and Glenn Tilbrook were responsible for a string of classics, some of which were hits, with Squeeze. With a line-up that originally included Jools Holland, Squeeze produced songs such as ‘Cool For Cats’, ‘Up The Junction’, ‘Pulling Mussels From A Shell’, ‘Black Coffee In Bed’ and ‘Hourglass’. After disbanding in 98, Tilbrook and Difford have been performing solo, but they are back later in the year for a reunion tour. In the meantime, Chris will be performing many of those classic songs in an intimate setting. Tues 8 May, Komedia, Brighton, 01273 647100
Mika More so than any other act, this is the fellow who many believe will be THE star of 2007. Already his gigs are being shifted into larger venues, and the media are increasingly upping the hyperbole on this 23-year-old pop machine in the making. Why so? It may be because he emulates the long lost but not forgotten Freddie Mercury. And it could also be that he is a great songwriter, performer, producer and orchestrator. Or it might be the heady, euphoric rush he produces, neatly tied in with universal melodramas and tales of love won and lost, hope gained and denied. Or how about that we are in need of a degenerate dandy with one of those you-couldn’t-make-up backgrounds (Beirut-born, grew up in the midst of war, father held hostage, self-imposed exile in Paris and so on). Or it could be all these. Being a face for the forthcoming Paul Smith campaign and getting more than half a million hits on MySpace can only point in one direction. Up! Fri 11 May, Concorde 2, Brighton, 01273 673311. (This is a rescheduled date from February. Tickets remain valid.)
NOWBOOKING Chris Difford 8 May, Komedia The loveGods 10 May, Komedia Shooglenifty 11 May, Komedia The Great Escape 17-19 May, various venues in Brighton, www.escapegreat.com Willy Mason 18 May, Pavilion Theatre Mingus Big Band 23 May, Brighton Dome G4 24 May, Brighton Centre Ray Davies 26 May, Brighton Centre Joan As Policewoman 27 May, Concorde 2 Girls Aloud 29 May, Brighton Centre Pet Shop Boys 30 May, Brighton Centre Tom McRae 5 June, Concorde 2 Manic Street Preachers 6 June, B’ton Dome CocoRosie 12 June, Komedia, Brighton Allen Toussaint 15 June, Brighton Dome INXS 17 June, Brighton Dome Devo 18 June, Brighton Dome Ronan Keating 21 June, Stanmer Park Orchestral Manoeuvres In The Dark 22 June, Brighton Dome
Blackmore’s Night 23 June, Brighton Dome Jools Holland & Lulu 23 June, Borde Hill Garden, Haywards Heath Royal Philharmonic 24 June, Stanmer Park The Be Good Tanyas 24 July, St George’s Church James Last Orchestra 22 September, Brighton Centre Natasha Bedingfield 26 September, Brighton Dome Don McLean 23 Oct, Brighton Centre Dio, lommi, Butler and Appice 11 Nov, Brighton Centre Alice Cooper + Motorhead 13 Nov, Brighton Centre Beverley Knight 24 Nov, Brighton Dome Babyshambles 25 Nov, Brighton Centre From The Jam 21 Dec, Brighton Centre
latest 7 39
040_LS319_RR/Molly
4/26/07
11:29 AM
Page 2
RADIOREVERB
Foxy Mamma Malone Malone thought beaches and babies went together. Then out came the make-up...
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The baby has had her first pedicure. I am not happy about it. I was down the beach with friends, and friends of friends, when I suddenly had to run home for a few minutes to deal with an urgent matter that needed to be dealt with, um, in the bathroom. When I returned, literally like eight minutes later, my angelic baby girl had red toenails! I was mortified. All I could think is of the chemicals going into her porous little membranes. She could have been allergic to it, as well as wheat. How am I going to get it off? Using more chemicals! Grrrr. I’d left her with my friend, and it was her friend – who I’ve never met before – who cajoled said friend into painting the baby’s nails, so I felt unable to say how annoyed I am as I’ve only just met her. She’s an eight-month-old baby for God’s sake. You don’t put chemicals near them. And to cap it off, as my baby sucks her own toes (I know, cute – she’s going to be a yoga teacher, I think), she might ingest the varnish. I wonder if I am being over the top. Am I being a neurotic mother? Or is it okay for me to be peed off? If it was me, I would have asked before I did that. But then I wouldn’t want to taint a beautiful baby’s weeny toenails. I’m surprised they just didn’t go the whole hog and pierce her ears and dress her in a Reebok tracksuit.
“I had to run home for a few minutes and when I returned my baby girl had red toenails!” Thing is, it was a hot Sunday afternoon, I imagine everyone had had a few drinkies, they probably weren’t thinking. I forget because I don’t drink in the day any more. You can’t drink in the afternoon when you are charged with looking after a baby single-handedly. Y’know, in case you flake after one Magners, which I usually do. Baby bedtime with an afternoon hangover is no fun. I was so looking forward to summer with the baby. I thought it would be all fun and sun, but now I’m worried I’m always going to be heading home to do baby stuff whilst others are drinking and sunbathing. I’ve tried to take baby on the beach. I even bought her a SPF 50 sun tent for her to sit in, but she wants to lounge outside with us. Of course, she wants the one thing I don’t want her to put in her mouth – pebbles. Unfortunately the beach is full of the little blighters… it’s bloomin’ made of them. Perhaps though it’s better than sand. I wonder what would happen if she ate sand. She’s teething and eating everything and anything at the moment. She chews on my phone, my bracelet and of course her favourite – the TV remote control. Still no sign of her first tooth, though. I’m scared. Will she scream all night as the first tooth pierces through her gums? Hopefully it will just appear suddenly and painlessly with a toothbrush and some Colgate. Ah well I’m sure it won’t be as bad as taking nail varnish off a toenail measuring 3mm by 3mm that never stops moving.
For comments and chit chat email editorial@thelatest.co.uk
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Join Latest Homes’ resident fat boy Andrew Kay with his extra special guests from the worlds of theatre, food and drink Listen live at radioreverb.com or get in touch by emailing studio@radioreverb.com 40 latest 7
Crossword solutions Solution to Cryptic 90 ACROSS: 3 Transform 7 Ill 8 Leaseholder 10 Acorn 11 Dismast 13 Allude 14 Impede 17 Mediate 19 Noted 20 Psychologic 22 All 23 Sponsored. DOWN: 1 Fire alarm 2 All Fool’s Day 3 Trained 4 Agenda 5 Scots 6 Rye 9 Dialectical 12 Treadmill 15 Managed 16 Seller 18 Ashes 21 Sap. Solution to Quick 90 ACROSS: 3 Samaritan 7 One 8 Renaissance 10 Elope 11 Entered 13 Armlet 14 Regain 17 Dunster 19 Rhine 20 Preconceive 22 Leo 23 Descender. DOWN: 1 Housemaid 2 Performance 3 Sincere 4 Maiden 5 Reset 6 Arc 9 Narratively 12 Dandelion 15 Earlier 16 Traced 18 Trove 21 Roe. © Crossword Shop
For coverage in this magazine email editorial@thelatest.co.uk
041_LS319_barsbarreview/clubs
4/26/07
4:38 PM
Page 3
BARS &CLUBS
THIS WEEK AND THE MONTH AHEAD ★Latest 7 enjoys happy hour at The Bell
Strawberry Social @ The King And Queen Like life itself, the Bank Holiday is all too short – that’s why it’s essential to pack as much as possible into the precious hours away from your lathe. Helping you along, Brighton stalwarts Beat Circus and Strawberry Social are coming together for 12 non-stop hours of live music, comedians. magicians, and jugglers with the odd DJ thrown in for good measure. Best of all: the profits are going to charity, namely International Care And Relief, who help build schools in Africa. With breaksmeister extraordinaire Soul Of Man headlining the main room, it’s shaping up to be a classic bash. The King And Queen, 13 Marlborough Place, Sunday 6 May, 12pm-2am, £10/£8.
Wild Fruit @ Creation Fancy pulling a rich Essex bird? If a return ticket to Chelmsford doesn’t appeal, you could do worse than donning your best rags for a night inspired by the (and I quote) ‘cat-fighting sluts’ who make up the current belles of the England football team. Mr ‘Last Night A DJ Saved My Life’ Seamus Haaji will be providing an electro-house soundtrack while the Fruity faithful play havoc with the dress-up box. Creation, 78 West Street, 6 May, 10pm-3am, £12/£11/£10
Kabuki Launch @ Kabuki Like some kind of benevolent coastal vampire (think Dracula with flip flops), Brighton nightlife thrives on new blood. Launching this weekend, the latest clubbing contender is Kabuki, a fresh VIP-inspired space promising to add a decadent twist to the average night out. Making the most of the bespoke lighting and sound system will be Mike Panteli playing urban house on the Friday, followed by an eclectic mix from the residents to christen Saturday night. Kabuki, 9-12 Middle Street, 4 May, 11pm–late, £7/£6
Dirty Weekend @ Ocean Rooms Already dubbed the ‘new Boutique’ by, er, their press release – Dirty Weekend is nonetheless something really special. A zeitgeist-inhaling smorgasbord of electro delicacies and indie gorgeousness, it’s über-cool without bothering to try too hard. They’ve already had an enviable roster of guests (including the wonderful New Young Pony Club) and the residents do more than just make up the numbers. Ocean Rooms, 1-2 Morley Street, 26 May, 11pm-4am, £5
A new renovation in time for summer means a trip to The Bell in Hove is in order. Under new ownership, the attractive bar is modest and comfortable, with a friendly service and great drink promotions during happy hour (which is actually three hours, 4-7pm Monday to Friday!). A perfect place to relax and catch up with friends, The Bell may quickly become your favourite local with its relaxed atmosphere and entertainment provided in the form of quiz nights (contact the pub for upcoming dates). As this was my first visit, the food is yet to be sampled, giving me a great excuse to return again soon, as The Bell prides itself on serving up fresh food every day, sourced from local suppliers. From home-made beefburgers and mouth-watering puddings to a traditional Sunday roast, the food offered here is great value. Located deep in the popular Hove area near George Street, just off Blatchington Road, The Bell is easy to find and worthy of a visit daytime or evening. Zara Friend The Bell, 15–17 Belfast Street, Hove, East Sussex, 01273 770773
LATE NIGHT BARS
It’s past midnight, you’re still thirsty, but don’t want to go clubbing; here’s our guide to after-hours drinking Above Audio 10 Marine Parade, Brighton, 01273 606906 Sun–Thu, until 1am, Fri–Sat, until 2am Aqua Bar 23 Waterfront, Brighton Marina, 01273 819800, Sun–Thu, 11am–12am, Fri–Sat, 11am–2am Arc Bar 160 King’s Road Arches, Brighton, 01273 770505, Mon–Sun, until 2am Cosmopolitan Bar The Cosmopolitan Hotel, 29-31 New Steine, Marine Parade, Brighton, Mon–Thu, 4pm–12am, Fri 4pm–2am, Sat 3pm–2am, Sun 12pm–11.30pm Earth and Stars 46 Windsor Street, Brighton, 01273 722879, Sun–Thu, until 1am, Fri–Sat, til 2am The Fiddler’s Elbow 11 Boyce’s Street,Brighton, 01273 325850, Sun–Thu, until 2am, Fri–Sat, until 3am Fish Bowl 74 East Street, Brighton, 01273 777505, Sun–Wed, until 2am, Thu–Sat, until 3am The Freebutt 1 Phoenix Place, Brighton, 01273 603974, Sun–Thu, until 12am, Fri–Sat, until 1am The Globe 78 Middle Street, Brighton, 01273 770685, Sun–Wed, until 2am, Thu–Sat, until 3am Grand Central 29-30 Surrey Street, Brighton, 01273 329086, Sun–Wed, until 12am, Thu–Sat, until 2am The Hope 11-12 Queen’s Road, Brighton, 01273 325793, Sun–Wed, until 12am, Thu–Sat, until 2am
The Joogleberry 14-17 Manchester Street, Brighton, 01273 687171, Mon–Sat, 11am–1am, Sunday until 12am Koba 135 Western Road, Brighton, 01273 720059, www.kobauk.com. Mon–Thu, until 5am, 24 hours over the weekend. Rehab Bar Waterfront, Brighton Marina, 01273 675007, Sun–Thu, until 12am Riki Tik 18A Bond Street, Brighton, 01273 683844, until 3.30am Fri and Sat Saqqara 158 North Street, Brighton, 01273 779701, until 2am Sidewinder 65 St James’s Street, Brighton, 01273 608571, Sun–Thu, until 1am, Fri–Sat, until 2am St. Christopher’s The Palace Hotel, 10–12 Grand Junction Road, Brighton, 01273 202035, open until 2am Vanilla 73A Western Road, Hove, 01273 748182, Tue–Thu, 5.30pm–1.30am, Fri–Sat, 5pm–2.30am, Sun 12pm–1am, closed Mondays Western Front 11 Cranbourne Street, Brighton, 01273 725656, Sun–Wed, until 2am, Thu–Sat, until 3am Zoot Street Bar 8 Queen’s Road, Brighton, 087 1223 5776, Sun–Wed, 5pm–11pm, Thu–Sat, 5pm–1pm
For bar/club listings see our day-to-day guide starting on page 51 latest 7 41
042_LS319_gay
4/26/07
1:05 PM
Page 2
GAY
News Wild Fruit has a party for the Queen As Queen Elizabeth celebrates her 81st birthday, the Wild Fruit crew will be packing a load of fun into the stunning historic Stanmer House for The Queen’s Garden Party 2007 on Saturday 9 June. Queen of queens Lola Lasagne will be hosting the party which will have the same magic as The Black And White Ball last December. Her royal highness Dolly of Rocket will keep the court jesters and stilt walkers in order and The Dame Edna Experience will top the bill. Wild Fruit promises its usual high standard of production with a special dance area for a top line-up of Wild Fruit’s favourite DJs. It’s going to be a right royal knees-up and the £35 tickets gets you a free BBQ, return transport to the city centre, all the entertainment and music that
you can take, plus free entry to the after party. There’s a limited number of pre-party dinner tickets for that extra special royal treatment. Email info@aeonevents.co.uk for further details. Tickets will be available from: The Hub, Clone Zone, Prowler, Ticketweb.co.uk and the Dome box office on 01273 709709.
Green fingers for charity Sussex Beacon is looking for garden owners to join its Garden Gadabout event to be held this year on Sundays 15 July and 22 July. For those of you who love poking around other people’s gardens, the event has lots to offer and helps raise money for the HIV and Aids charity. Last year, more than 200 people followed the Kemp Town trail and helped raise over £2,000 for Sussex Beacon. If you have a garden and would like to take part, visit www.sussexbeacon.org.uk. The closing date is Tuesday 8 May.
Stanmer House
CHOICE Tue 1 May
Fri 4 May
V2 Club Open 10pm–late. Music videos upstairs and karaoke downstairs until 12am.
Revenge 10.30pm–5am. Lollipop Vs Kinky Dangerous. DJ Dulcie Danger banging away upstairs with the fabulous Lollipop Girls hosting downstairs. £5 before 11pm, £7 after.
Wed 2 May Queens Arms 2:30–11:30pm. food, wi-fi access and happy hour till 7pm. Back to school theme plus cabaret with Cassidy Conners at 9.30pm.
Thu 3 May Charles Street Club 10.30pm–3am. Religion. Hosted by Mother Superior Joan Bond with DJs Richard Jones and Tony B on the decks. £5/£4 flyer/£3 NUS.
Sat 5 May Star Inn 11am–1am. Food 12–4pm. Proud To Bear night, 8pm.
Sun 6 May Sunday Sundae 6pm–late. New! £2 before 7pm, £4 before 8pm, £5 after
Mon 7 May Marlborough pub 12pm–12am. Student social night from 6pm. Games, pool and tunes.
3SIXTY is Brighton’s brightest monthly gay magazine with news, interviews, features and listings for the gay scene around Brighton and Hove. May’s edition is out now. Pick up your free copy across the city. You can also now download a full issue at www.3sixtymag.co.uk 3SIXTY T: 01273 570570 E: info@3sixtymag.co.uk
Pubs & bars Amsterdam, 11 Marine Parade Bar, hotel, sauna and popular summer terrace. Food available every day. 01273 688825 www.amsterdam.uk.com Aquarium, 6 Steine Street Traditional back-street boozer. 01273 605525 www.pleisure.com Barley Mow, 92 St George’s Road Mixed and friendly local in Kemp Town serving good food. Nice outside terrace too. 01273 682259 Brighton Rocks, 6 Rock Place Fabulously stylish bar and restaurant with outside decking. 01273 601139 Bulldog, 31 St James’s Street Landmark gay pub for 25 years. Entertainment, happy hours. 01273 694097 www.bulldogbrighton.com Charles Street, 8 Marine Parade Huge, swish café/bar serving food. Outside terrace. Open ’til 3am Fri/Sat. 01273 624091 www.charlesstreetbar.com Doctor Brighton’s 16–17 Kings Road Popular pub with huge selection of vodkas. 01273 328765 www.pleisure.com Fountain Inn High Street, Handcross Gay oasis in the countryside near Gatwick and very popular. 01444 400218 www.fountainpub.co.uk Jack Horner, 80 High Street, Worthing Worthing’s only gay pub. Some themed nights. 01903 236427
42 latest 7
Legends Bar, Dance and Hotel 31-34 Marine Parade Recently reopened after a multimillion pound refit. Marine Tavern, 13 Broad Street Cosy, traditional and friendly boozer with real beer. 01273 681284 www.marinetavern.co.uk Marlborough, 4 Princes Street Large pub popular with the girls, with a great theatre upstairs. 01273 570028 www.marlboroughtheatre.co.uk PV, 22 Upper North Street Great mixed pub with cool interior and regular live music. 01273 325491 www.thepv.co.uk Queen’s Arms, 7 George Street Opens 3pm daily. Top acts every night. 01273 696873 www.queensarmsbrighton.com R-Bar, 7 Marine Parade Open till 2am, Sun–Thu; 24 hours, Fri–Sun. 01273 608133 www.revenge.co.uk Revue Bar, 19 New Steine Stylish bar, friendly atmosphere. 01273 607456 Star Inn, 5–9 Manchester Street Traditional-style pub in Kemp Town for bears, with quiz on Thu. Extensive lunch and dinner menu every day, plus great Sunday roasts. 01273 601450 Vavoom, 31 Old Steine Video bar, right next door to Revenge. 01273 603010 www.vavoom.co.uk White Horse, 30 Camelford St Friendly mixed local. 01273 603726 The Zone, 33 St James’s Street Bar promising something different for Brighton’s drinkers. 01273 626442
Clubs Audio Hosts Sunday Sundae 10 Marine Parade Weekly chill out with occasional specials and drink promos. 01273 606906 Candy Bar, 129 St James’s Street UK’s only lesbian nightclub, ’til 3am, Fri/Sat. 01273 622424 www.thecandybar.co.uk Charles Street Club, 8 Marine Parade Sleek club above Charles Street Bar. Nightly promoters. 10pm–2am, 01273 624091 Harlequin, 43 Providence Place Bar/nightclub, cabaret/strippers, Fri/Sat nights. 9pm–4am, Fri/Sat. 01273 620630 www.harlequin-brighton.co.uk Monkey, Brighton Gloucester, 27 Gloucester Place Every Saturday night. www.wildfruit.co.uk 01273 688011 Revenge, 32 Old Steine Huge two-floor club. 10pm–3am, Sun–Thu ’til 5am Fri and Sat ’til 6am. www.revenge.co.uk Therapy @ Rehab Waterfront, Brighton Marina A weekly gay night at Brighton Marina, every Friday. A lovely stylish big bar! V2, 5 Steine Street Open every night from 8pm until late. 01273 603010 Wildfruit, Creation, 78 West Street Usually once a month, with themed nights. One for your calendar! www.wildfruit.co.uk
043_LS319_stage
4/26/07
2:52 PM
Page 1
STAGE
Tinker Taylor We catch Taylor Mac’s one, errr… person tour-de-force in London prior to his Brighton Festival debut How do you define Taylor Mac? Is it drag, comedy, theatre, performance art? Or is it one very clever, very ‘sorted’ gay guy taking a scorching swipe at them all? I prepare by taking a look at his website. There he is in his ‘finery’, as he likes to describe his manner of dressing, in a bathtub, crooning to the strains, and I mean strains, of his ukulele. It’s absolutely beautiful, he is absolutely beautiful – but it’s no preparation for what is to come, none whatsoever. At 9.30pm prompt the lights in the Soho Theatre dim. There is a tangible sense of expectation in the room. I guess we have all looked at his website. Suddenly there is a heavy clump-clump as Taylor appears at the back of the auditorium dragging a huge, cheap suitcase down the stairs to the stage. Clump, clump, clump it goes, announcing his arrival. Taylor is wearing rags, pretty rags finished off with what can only be described as the remnants of a rara skirt made of surgical rubber gloves. His head is crowned with a Medusa-like mop of blonde dreads. His make-up is half happy half sad, a tranny clown. The form of the show, he explains, will be a selection of excerpts from his career. ‘The best of really, although they have billed it as The Beast of.’ He also explains that he will not tolerate what he calls ‘catty chatty’ which I assume is people who do not pay attention, or who chatter or heckle. He makes it quite clear that he will humiliate anyone who crosses the
line. ‘I know I shouldn’t bite the hand that feeds me, but I do like to get a little blood on it!’ And blood is certainly spilled over the next 80 minutes, but mainly his. Taylor Mac bares his soul for all to see in a hysterical but heartbreaking bravura performance that has me crying with laughter and weeping genuine tears of sadness. After his opening monologue he rips open the suitcase and scatters the contents across the stage – an act of evisceration symbolic of his previous incarnations, perhaps. Costumes, in tatters mainly, fly everywhere and throughout the show he will discard and add to what he is wearing. Monologues and rants are punctuated with songs. There is much about his own state, his seemingly loveless life, his ex-lovers, his unrequited romances, his sexual fantasies, failings and the desperate hollowness of casual sexual encounters. Be prepared – Taylor spares no detail from his show and the sorrows and disgust that he has felt he aims to make you feel too. That’s not to say that the show lacks heart or humour, for it has both. And although he paints a sad picture of his emotional state, he also paints a picture of his personal strength. Anecdotes of how the general public take to him as he sports his ‘finery’ on the streets are both funny and inspiring. Like Quentin Crisp before him, he expects the world to accept him for what and who he is, and anyone who cannot is beyond his field of interest. He does eventually get someone from the audience on stage, a shy man in his twenties who finds it hard to relax, understandably. But eventually Taylor has him, like putty, he starts to perform, like a lamb to the slaughter, then just as quickly Taylor spares him. His own brand of self-deprecation is not something he is going to force on others. Perhaps the most moving moment is a song in two parts. Running from stage left to stage right, one minute he is the straight man witnessing the birth of his first child, the next he is himself on the other side of New York city, engaged in an act of deeply unsatisfying sex with a man, far more interested in keeping the linen clean than any form of emotional involvement. It’s the common theme throughout the show: sex is easy, love almost impossible. Before we are ready to accept the end the show is over. It seems like 20 minutes has passed but a quick check reveals that it is an hour and 20. The applause is deafening. He bows and we go quiet. ‘‘I could do that whole going off thing and make you beg for more but I can’t be bothered.’’ He lifts his ukulele and strums. It’s a tiny song, a plaintive little encore that leaves us satisfied despite its brevity. Brighton beware, this is drag theatre as you have never seen it before. Theatre with roots in Lindsay Kemp, Bloolips, La Grande Eugene – forget camp, this is concentration camp! Taylor Mac is at Komedia, Brighton, Tue 22–Wed 23 May, 9.45pm, £12.50/£10.50. Call 01273 647100 or see www.komedia.co.uk latest 7 43
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THEATRE LISTINGS
From Tuesday 1 to Monday 28 May 2007 BRIGHTON DOME 01273 709709 www.brightondome.org Futurology: A Global Revue The English premiere – a darkly comic show of dance and cabaret, looking at global issues including climate change and low supplies of fossil fuels. •Sat 5–Thu 10 May, 8pm, £15–£18 Run Lola Run Featuring a live soundtrack from The Bays, this stage performance based on the BAFTA award nominated film tells the story about Lola who has to come up with 100,000 marks to save her boyfriend from his gangster nemesis. •Sat 5–Sun 6 May, 8pm, £16 Simon Armitage and Robert Macfarlane Simon Armitage and Robert Macfarlane delve into the English classic Sir Gawain and the Green Knight. A ghost story, thriller, romance, myth and morality tale rolled into one. •Sat 5 May, 7.30pm, £7.50 Brighton Festival Youth Choir The dynamic young choir perform choral classics from Purcell to Britten. •Mon 7 May, 1pm, £7.50 Tom Crean – Antarctic Explorer A multiaward winning one-man show, from Aidan Dooley, looking at the life of Tom Crean. •Mon 7 May, 1pm, £7.50 Czech National Symphony Orchestra Bringing rich Eastern European sound to the Brighton Festival. •Wed 9 May, 8pm, £10–£28.50 Wish I Was Here – Jackie Kay Two tragically funny short stories presented by Jackie Kay. Set to a specially commissioned soundscape. •Fri 11 May, 9pm, £7.50 Import/Export – Les Ballets C. de la B. A stunning performance combining dance, acrobatics, live music and song exploring the theme of powerlessness. •Sat 12–Tue 15 May, 8pm, £15–£22.50 Sarmistha Guha – Indian Dance Classical Indian dance with rising young Bengali star. •Sat 12 May, 1pm, £7.50 Michael Clark Company Contemporary dance. •Sat 19 May, 8pm, £6–£22.50
BRIGHTON LITTLE THEATRE 01273 777748 www.the-little.co.uk The Merchant Of Venice One of Shakespeare's best-known plays – a comedy portraying the tormented character of Shylock who is also a tormenter, creating changing views for the watching audience. Book through the Brighton Festival at www.brightonfestivalfringe.org.uk •Sat 5–Sat 12 May, 7.45pm, £7.50/£8.50 Blue/Orange Two psychiatrists argue over the diagnosis of a black patient who claims to be the son of Idi Amin. •Tue 22–Sat 26 May, please book through Brighton Festival website
THE CAPITOL, HORSHAM 01403 750220 www.thecapitolhorsham.com Dangerous Corner Ian Dickens Productions present J B Priestley’s classic thriller where one loose word leads to an explosion of emotions and suspicions. •Fri 4–Sat 5, please call for times and prices Daisy Pulls It Off A story about life in an English girl’s boarding school. Daisy must fight off prejudices from snobby classmates while searching for the hidden treasure that will save the fortunes of the school. •Wed 9–Sat 12 May, please call for times and prices Russian Cossock Dance Company Direct from Moscow, 50 dancers, musicians and singers present a dynamic production packed with energy performed to a live orchestra. •Sun 6 May, please call for times and prices Two Kinds Of Magic A show of two halves: acclaimed concert of Queen hits and then the legendary songs of Electric Light Orchestra. •Wed 9 May, please call for times and prices 44 latest 7
Big Chris Barber Jazz. swing, blues and big band sounds from 1950s legend Chris Barber. •Thu 10 May, please call for times and prices Cannon and Ball A chance to see the great double act who have been in show business for over 40 years. •Wed 23 May, please call for times and prices
CHICHESTER FESTIVAL THEATRE 01243 781312 www.cft.org.uk Office Suite A double bill from Alan Bennett on the apparent predictability of life in an office, starring Patricia Routledge. •Tue 1–Thu 12 May. SOLD OUT The Last Confession The world premiere of this new thriller surrounding one of the most highly guarded institutions: The Vatican. (Preshow talk on 3 May) •Tue 1–Thu 19 May, please call for show times. £10–£32
THE HAWTH, CRAWLEY 01293 553636 www.hawth.co.uk Skin Tight A moving, magical and brutal play about love and the human condition. Elizabeth is dying and she must make the most of her time left with Tom, sharing memories and dreams. •Sat 19 May, please call for times and prices
KOMEDIA, BRIGHTON 01273 647100 www.komedia.co.uk Mayday! The Musical Following the popular Improvability Drive, the Maydays return in a musical extravaganza completely improvised! •Fri 4–Sat 5 May, 9pm, £8/£7. Tickets from www.ticketsource.co.uk Brecht On Magic Three gods from Bertolt Brecht’s play come to earth looking for socialist culture in capitalist society. A blend of stand-up comedy, magic, ventriloquism and political commentary. •Fri 11–Wed 16 May, 6.45pm, £5/£3.50 Cassandra A huge hit on the Canadian Fringe circuit, this is a post-9/11 re-working of the story about Cassandra, who had a gift to see the future but whose curse was not to be believed. An intense drama. •Fri 11–Sat 12 May, 9.30pm, £6/£5 Clay Time A kids play with clay where the audience are invited to participate. Interactive theatre with amazing animals and morphing monsters based on the imagination of the young theatre-goers. Ages 3–6 years. •Sun 13 May, 12pm and 2pm, £6/£5 ‘I’m Your Late Night Evening’ – Slowly I Turn Theatre/cabaret work with two female performers, with the name ‘Slowly I Turn’ based on the popular Vaudeville skit. •Thu 17–Sat 19 May, 6.30pm, £5/£3 Anne Pigalle: Spirit of Ecstasy / Blank Productions: Life Studies A double bill exploring the themes of love, sex and intrigue in Anne Pigalle, plus Mark Hewitt’s evocative nudes in words with an experimental live literature production. •Sun 20 May, 6.30pm, £7/£5 The Adventures Of Tom Thumb Modern-day telling of the Grimm brothers’ tale with Tom as a bedridden 80-year-old, dreaming of escaping his nursing home for one last adventure. Ages 6+/ •Sun 20 May, 2pm, £6/£5 Gamarjobat European premiere of Rock ’n’ Roll Penguin, with Brighton Fringe Festival award winners, Gamarjobat •Wed 23–Sat 26 May, please call for show times, £12.50/£10.50 Hysteria An awkward dinner date with an academic whose research is threatening his sanity and an events manager who is terrified of missing the party. Thrown into the mix is a waiter haunted by visions of global catastrophe. Irreverent humour and a fight for survival. •Thu 24–Sat 26 May, please call for show times, £12.50/£10.50
Queen Of The Slaughter Live music, dance and theatre blend in this show about a man who leaves home to fight on the front line in a cause he believes in. •Fri 25–Sun 27 May please call for show times, £10/£5 20,000 Leagues Under The Office On a lunch break, two office workers suddenly find themselves plunging towards the centre of the earth – sensational comedy debut from Publick Transport filled with slapstick, parody and melodrama. •Sat 26–Sun 27 May, 8pm, £12.50 Mayday! The Musical Totally improvised musical extravaganza with The Maydays. •Sat 26–Sun 27 May, please call for show times, £8/£7
MARLBOROUGH THEATRE, BRIGHTON 07782 278521 www.marlboroughtheatre.co.uk Shoe Baby Puppet Show Sing-along adventure about a baby who takes to the sea, the air and the zoo – all in a shoe! Ages 2–6 •Sat 5–Sun 6 May, 4pm and 5pm, £6 Bring Me Einstein/ Robin Fry: Rock Historian Katy Schutte explores the funny side of Hitler’s least favourite genius and Robin Fry gives us a speedy history of rock. •Sat 5, Fri 11 and Sat 12 May, 10.30pm, £6/£5 Hamlet Halcyon Productions present Max Day’s Hamlet, looking at the possibility of a man going his whole life without really knowing who he is. •Mon 7–Sat 12 May, 8pm, £10/£8, tickets on 07786 984900 Four Play Revised Edition Theatre Company present new plays written by Cavendish School students, performed by professional actors. •Tue 8–Thu 10 May, 6.30pm, £5 Smoke And Mirrors Three interlocking monologues based around love, loss, family and relationships, presented by Writers Block. •Sat 12–Sun 13 May and Sat 26–Sun 27 May, 4pm, £6/£5 Träuma A sketch show about a seafarer facing a dilemma. Meanwhile a zoophile raconteur realises his true love. Disturbing and ludicrous in equal parts. •Fri 11–Sun 13 May, 6pm, £8/£6. Tickets on 07786 984900. Little Howard And The Magic Pencil Of Life And Death Family show. Little Howard meets his maker The Pencil Of Creation, but unfortunately on the other end is The Runner Of Doom. •Sat 12–Sun 13 May and Sat 26–Sun 27 May, 2pm, £5/£4. Tickets on 07786 984900. Raised In Brighton Second-year acting students from Varndean College present theatre created in response to growing up in Brighton. •Tue 15–Sun 16 May, 6pm, £5 Caviar And Chips VIP Theatre Company present the story of three unlikely friends who run to Wrigley. Original comic routines, tequila nights and more. •Thu 17–Sun 20 May, 6pm, £8/£6 Menno in “BUTCH – A Queen’s Struggle To Become A King” Part love story, part musical, Manno is tired of being the token gay guy and decides to ‘butch up’ and get in touch with his masculine side. This is important as he’s fallen for an ultra-masculine, straight-acting army captain who hates anything camp... •Tue 15–Thu 17 May, 8pm, £8/£6 These Four Walls The tale of Lena, a young cellist in 1930’s Berlin, who hid her Jewish family in her apartment. Now, there is only the cupboard to hide in... •Fri 18–Sun 20 May, 8pm (Fri and Sat) 2pm (Sat and Sun), £7/£5 Blame Us Drama-based sketches with young trainee executives with a unique approach to corporate learning. •Tue 22–Thu 24 May, 6.30pm, £5 The Elevator Man 5d Theatre Company presents a comedy about a hapless dreamer who meets a dream woman. •Tue 22–Thu 24 May, 8pm, £8/£6 Cuss The World A shocking exploration into lives of 21st century teenagers. •Fri 25–Sun 27 May, 6pm, £7/£5 A Public Kind Of Prviacy Dubbed as a Dr Faustus experience – a rising political star comes face to face with her past. •Fri 25–Sat 26 May, 8pm, £7/£5
NIGHTINGALE THEATRE, BRIGHTON 01273 702563 www.nightingaletheatre.co.uk Lunatics Intense and physical look at Jesus’ death and the formation of the Christian Church. Explicit language/violence – ages 16+ only. •Sat 5–Mon 7 May (post performance discussion on Sun 6) 8pm, £6.50/£8.50 Nordic Night Presented by Mara Lloyd and guests. Please contact the venue for more information. •Tue 8 May, 8pm, £8.50/£6.50 Idyll – A Comic Lament Presented by Unpacked. Please contact the venue for further information. •Wed 9–Fri 11 may, 8pm, £8.50/£6.50 The Little Girl Who Was Too Fond Of Matches Presented by Impetous Kinship. Suitable for ages 12+. Please contact the venue for further information. •Sat 12–Mon 14 May, 8pm, £8.50/£6.50
THEATRE ROYAL, BRIGHTON 08700 606650 www.theambassadors.com/theatreroyal Charley’s Aunt Comedy about mistaken identity, cross-dressing, deranged uncles and ravishing ladies. Stephen Tomkinson stars. •Tue 1–Sat 5 May, 7.45pm plus 2.30pm Thu and Sat, £16–£26 Dublin By Lamplight Set in the filth and fury of 1904 Dublin, fading stars, rebels, whores and romantics feature in this compelling concoction of vaudeville and tragicomedy. Hilarity and theatrical invention ensues. •Tue 8–Sat 12 May, 7.30pm plus 2.30pm Sat, £10–£20 Me: Moir Join Vic Reeves, actor, writer and comic for an evening of reminiscences on life as Jim Moir. •Wed 16 May, 7.30pm, £10 King Arthur Henry Purcell’s opera transporting us to the trenches of World War I with an enchanting score mirroring the fantastical vision of the Western Front. •Thu 17 May, 7.30pm, £5–£22.50
WORTHING: CONNAUGHT THEATRE 01903 206206 www.worthingtheatres.co.uk Danny The Champion Of The World Based on Roald Dahl’s best-loved book. Danny lives in a caravan with his Dad but face eviction from landowner Mr Hazell. The battle is on! •Tue 1–Sat 5 May, times and prices vary – please contact the venue
WORTHING: PAVILION THEATRE 01903 206206 www.worthingtheatres.co.uk Sing-Along–A–Abba Tribute to the Swedish group – sing along to the well-loved hits . •Wed 2 May, 8pm, £16 The Dolly Parton Story Mandy Winters, backed by a full band, explores the triumphs and heartaches of Dolly’s life. •Fri 4 May, 7.30pm, £14/£12.50 Vienna Festival Ballet Present Swan lake Stunning music by Tchaikovsky tells the wellknown love story told through dance and music, with lavish costumes and stunning scenery. •Sat 5 May, 2.30pm and 7.30pm, £14–£19 Our Times Productions Presents Follies Legendary musical featuring Stephen Sondheim’s Tony Award-winning score. Over 50 performers and musicians. •Sun 6 May, 7.30pm, £12–£15 Sussex Musical Productions Present The King And I Stunning musical based on the English widow, Anna, her young son and their life at the Royal Palace in Bangkok. •Tue 15–Sat 19 May, 7.30pm (Wed and Sat matinees 2.30pm), £12/£10 King Arthur, Theatre Royal, Brighton, Thur 17 May
If you would like your event listed please email listings@thelatest.co.uk
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EVENTS
THIS WEEK’S PREVIEWS City Books 21st Birthday Literary Lunch As the Brighton Festival kicks off, bigger and better than ever before, City Books celebrates its 21st birthday this Saturday 5 May. The public are cordially invited to the special literary lunch taking place at The Old Market in Hove. There, join acclaimed crime writer Peter James and a special surprise guest. Peter James’ latest books in the Roy Grace series are set in and around Brighton, meaning a loyal local fanbase has been formed. His previous forays into crime writing have been well received with his number one bestseller Possession having been translated into 26 languages. Meanwhile, his book Dead Simple is being adapted for television. The Old Market, Upper Market Street, Hove, Saturday 5 May, tickets available only through the Brighton Festival ticket office: 01273 709709. £30 (includes two-course lunch with wine), 12pm for a 12.30pm start
May play The Brighton Festival is here this week! Zara Friend takes a look at some fun events for the kids Summer’s in the air and nearly a whole month of non-stop events begin this Saturday! Yes, Brighton Festival Fringe is once again upon us and there is plenty planned to keep the kids entertained. Down at Komedia in the North Laine, festivities begin with a barrelful of laughs this Saturday with Comedy Club 4 Kids. As the world’s only standup show for children, this is quality comedy without the naughty bits. Suiting ages six and upwards, the laughs begin this Saturday at 2pm. A play with clay is next up on Sunday 13 May, also at Komedia. Like the hugely popular Maydays improvised plays for adults, Claytime is a fun alternative for kids with a unique show every time, based on audience suggestions and plenty of clay! Ideal for ages three to six, Claytime is an interactive show not to be missed. Later on in the month, the World Theatre Festival for Children and Youth takes place on 21 May at Friends’ Meeting House and at the Brighthelm Centre on 22 May. This special festival theatre combines music, comedy, drama and dance from around the world, performed by children aged eight to 12. A budding young performer yourself? Then see the contact details below to find out how you can take part in the World Theatre Festival. Rounding off festivities is a magical adventure at Friends’ Meeting House: Fruit Twist – Do You Believe In Dreams? Children can meet mystical characters and learn that it’s OK to be different sometimes. Also, discover what really goes on in your fridge when the lights go out! A fun performance from Village Playhouse Youth Theatre. Comedy Club 4 Kids, Komedia, Saturday 5 May, 4pm, £6. Claytime, Sunday 13 May, Komedia, 12–1pm and 2–3pm, £6/£5. World Theatre Festival for Children and Youth, Friends’ Meeting House, Monday 21 May, 5–6.30pm, £3/£1, and Tuesday 22 May at the Brighthelm Centre, 6.30–8pm, £3/£1. Fruit Twist – Do You Believe In Dreams? Friends Meeting House, Saturday 26, 5–6pm and Sunday 27 May, 7–8pm, £4/£2. Book on 01273 709709 or online at www.brightonfestivalfringe.org.uk
To feature in kids email editorial@thelatest.co.uk
The Liberace Of Baghdad Sean McAllister is joined by Rory McCarthy, Baghdad correspondent for The Guardian newspaper, for a special screening this Sunday, 6 May, at The Old Market in Hove. Over eight perilous months, Sean McAllister spent time in a heavily fortified Baghdad hotel with Samir Peter. The two men ate, drank, bunked and filmed together amidst the escalating violence. What emerged was an extraordinary first-hand insight into a country torn apart at the seams. The screening will be followed by a round-table debate on Iraq’s continuing crisis. The Old Market, Upper Market Street, Hove, Sunday 6 May, book tickets through the Brighton Festival ticket office: 01273 709709, 7pm, £7.50
Maddie Live Brighton’s first-ever variety talk show is back this coming Monday, 7 May, with more special guests joining Maddie in her Audrey Hepburnstyle hot tub. Filmed in front of a live audience, see first-hand how the glamour is achieved! This week’s guests include Nick Stockman, Richard Harris, Damien Barr, Flamenco Con Fusion and more. The Hanbury Club, 83 St George’s Road, Kemp Town, Monday 7 May, Brighton Festival ticket office: 01273 709709. Doors 7pm. Show 7.30pm–9.30pm. Tickets: 2 for 1, £7/£5
UPCOMING HIGHLIGHTS National Love Your Legs Day
Friday 4th May The Festival Eve Party The Old Market 7.30pm – 11.30pm Perfect Mailing List gals £8.00 or £8.50 adv/£10 door
01273 555334 www.mother-funkers.com Old Market Box Office 01273 736222 MF is sponsored by Latest 7 and Healys Solicitors
If you would like your event listed please email listings@thelatest.co.uk
Celebrate summer in style and bare your legs with confidence for National Love Your Legs Day on Tuesday 8 May. US hair removal experts Nair will lend a helping hand with special in-store offers at participating chemists and supermarkets. Baring your legs after being covered up all winter can be a daunting thought, and a recent study carried out by Nair found that 41 per cent of women claimed to hate their legs! However, the Nair leg technicians have set up a free, online assessment centre that will help you work out the best way to gain smooth, radiant skin. Log on to www.naircare.co.uk from May to take your consultation and receive all the expert advice you need. Once you discover the products best suited for your skin type, visit Boots, Superdrug and other leading chemists and supermarkets nationwide to take advantage of the special offers on Nair products to celebrate National Love Your Legs Day! For more information see www.nair.com Zara Friend latest 7 45
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Strawberry delight On Sunday 6 May Brighton will be buzzing with the sounds and delights of The Strawberry Circus to be held at the King and Queen. The Strawberry Social and the Beat Circus are working together to offer 12 hours of live music, DJs, visual performance, Jamaican BBQ, standup comedians, magicians, jugglers and graffiti artists. All profits will go to the ICR – International Care and Relief – who help to build schools in Africa and teach children how to develop skills. The whole event kicks off at 12 midday, when there will be five amazing bands including Los Albertos, comedians Paul McCaffrey and friends, market stalls and courtyard musicians. Then, when the sun starts to set, an amazing line-up of DJs starts with the Beat Circus. The upstairs function room will host the Wupadupa Soundtank Collective, and then step-up the tempo from 8pm with headlining DJs hosted by Brap.FM (Brighton's beat-eclectic radio station). The King and Queen, 12pm-2am. Advance tickets available at Rounder Records, Covert, Resident, and the Eagle pub. All ages welcome (under 18s accompanied by an adult).
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ART
See more at latest-art.co.uk O CONTEMPORARY
JENNIE RICKETTS GALLERY
Trafalgar Street, Brighton 01273 698500 D*face: Eyecons The notorious urban artist was part of the revolutionary 11 Spring Street event in New York, which attracted a lot of attention. He’ll be exhibiting one of the iconic images from that event along with new subverted icons. Until 6 May, Tue-Fri 10am5.30pm, Sat 10am-6pm, Sun 12am-5pm
8 Arundel Mews, Arundel Place, Brighton 01273 232921 Beatrice Haverich Photographs of trees from the book The Whisper Of A Million Leaves by Brighton-based Haverich, which highlights the resilience of trees despite some immense environmental challenges. 5-31 May, Tues-Fri 11am-6pm, Sat 12-6pm
PHOENIX GALLERY
UNIVERSITY OF BRIGHTON GALLERY
Waterloo Place, Brighton 01273 603700 Double Acts A celebration and mini-survey of collaborative practice in the UK today, featuring work and new commissions by Ayling and Conroy, Karin Kihlberg and Reuben Henry, The Library Of Unwritten Books and much more. Until 9 June, Tue-Sat 11am-5pm
Grand Parade, Brighton 01273 643101 Drawing Upon Drawing: 50 Years of Illustrating by John Vernon Lord Major retrospective of this illustrator whose work graces books, magazines and advertising media. Until 5 May, Mon-Sat 10am-5pm
THEATRE ROYAL BRIGHTON New Road, Brighton 08700 606650 PerSona Cambridge Jones has photographed the Queen, Tony Blair and a whole host of actors, politicians and musicians. This is a collaboration with Philippa Stanton who is synesthetic, a condition which allows her to see sound in colour, shape and texture. her compelling paintings depict a vivid and personal response to the spoken word. 20 subjects have undergone the ‘portrait’ treatment including Richard E Grant, Greta Scacchi, Timothy Spall and David Suchet. Until 27 May, during Theatre Royal opening hours and 11am-5pm on Sundays.
It came from the sea Petrusco was runner-up in the 2006 Your Essence of Brighton and Hove photography competition, and his entry included one of the most talkedabout images of the year (above). This solo exhibition features photography and short films, all with the aim of raising feelings, be they positive or negative. He has also set up No Budget film productions often working in tandem with Dan the Fisherman. The films are given out freely on DVD with a request to copy and distribute freely as well. Past films have featured a family of mummies (mother, father and a baby) which have been seen in street performances around Brighton and taken on anti-war demonstrations. The exhibition will include stills taken from his films. With a portfolio of work showing great imagination and a flair for the surreal, Petrusco is set to be one of the most colourful exhibitions of the year, helping launch one of Brighton’s most creative residents to the wider audience he deserves.
WORTHING MUSEUM AND ART GALLERY Chapel Road, Worthing 01903 221448 Luke Dickinson Sensual stone carvings. Until 23 Jun Tues-Sat, 10am-5pm Water, Water Everywhere 40 treasures from the museum’s stores, exploring watery themes. Until 16 Jun, Tues-Sat 10am-5pm
Petrusco, North Laine Photography Gallery, Kensington Gardens, 3-31 May
Mary McCartney @ Crane Kalman
IF YOU HAVE AN EVENT OR EXHIBITION YOU WOULD LIKE US TO ADVERTISE, CALL 01273 818150 TODAY
Out Now
ART LISTINGS UNIT 03 GALLERY
CHALK GALLERY
20 Wellington Road, Portslade 01273 417741 Barry Surtees New art gallery with opening exhibition featuring Barry Surtees’ vibrant and abstract 3D canvases.
North Street, Lewes 01273 474477 21 professional artists from across all media. Featuring Edith Barton – humourous and textural 3D artist. Mon-Sun 10am-5pm
BRIGHTON MUSEUM AND ART GALLERY
CRANE KALMAN, BRIGHTON
Church Street, Brighton 01273 290200 Rogues Gallery: Images of Crime and Punishment Display of popular prints featuring notorious crimes and punishments, mainly from the 18th and 19th centuries, including enemies of the state and real-life murderers. Until 30 September. Nicholas Sinclair – Six Public Telephones Six dramatic photographs taken in a subway station in Budapest by local photographer. Until 5 Aug, Tues 10am-7pm, Wed-Sat 10am-5pm, Sun 2-5pm Stagestruck! 200 years of the Theatre Royal by way of vintage prints and photographs, costumes and props, and reconstructions of ‘special efects’ of the 19th century stage. 5 May-2 September. 48 latest 7
Kensington Gardens, Brighton 01273 697096 Mary McCartney A photographic study of the Royal ballet, after hours! 3 May-17 June, Mon-Sat 10am-6pm, Sun 10.30am-4.30pm
HOVE MUSEUM AND ART GALLERY New Church Road, Hove 01273 290200 Paper Cuts Eight artists employ paper cutting techniques to reflect on our culture and environment. Paper cutting has been used by different cultures throughout history to mark events and religious occasions, and the delicate nature of paper relates to our vulnerability, dreams and ambitions. Until 1 July Susan Edwards Unwanted books that have been transformed into paper sculptures (see above). Until 1 July, Wed-Sat 11.30am-5pm, Sun 2-5pm
Call Kate on 01273 818150 to advertise
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LISTINGS
YOUR COMPLETE LISTINGS GUIDE STARTS HERE
latestlistings The hottest tickets for the week ahead 1–7 May Jason Donovan
★LITERATURE★
The Brighton Moment A literary cabaret with pizzazz, where some of the city's most exciting writers shine a spotlight on life in Brighton. Catch contributions – some famous, some infamous, and some brand spanking new – from Jeff Noon, Julie Burchill, Peter James, Helen Zahavi, William Shaw and more. Come mingle in the ballroom, grab yourself a drink, then sit back and enjoy this rare, onenight-only show. The Sussex Arts Club, Brighton, book on 01273 709709 (remaining tickets to be sold on the door), Wednesday 2 May, 7pm doors, for 7.30pm start, £5/£4
★MUSIC★
Jason Donovan Oh yes indeed, it’s Scott from Neighbours, fresh outta da jungle, and ready to strut his musical stuff on the stage. Are you watching, Charlene? Brighton Dome, Tuesday 1 May, 7.30pm, £22.50
Simon Kirke
The ex-Free and Bad Company drummer is a multi-talented musician in his own right. Here he will be performing an intimate show playing guitar and piano, telling rock’n’roll stories and singing some classics, as well as his own new material. Komedia, Brighton, Thursday 3 May, 8pm, £12.50
Bobby Conn
Eccentric and flamboyant cult American who dismantles pop, but manages to blend marvellous melodies with traditional song structures to create a distinctive sound with echoes of 70s glam and 60s lounge. Check out his excellent new album, King For A Day. Audio, Brighton, Friday 4 May, 7.30pm, £8
Mark Thomas
Mark Thomas
★MUSIC★
★MUSIC★
★STAND-UP★ The controversial, intelligent funny guy off TV’s The Mark Thomas Product brings his wares to the Concorde. Concorde 2, Brighton, Wednesday 2 May, 8pm, £14/10
Simon Kirke
★MUSIC★
Mayday
Chas & Dave Cockney legends who are suddenly back in fashion again. Not surprising really, as they are truly superb musicians, lyric writers and performers. Expect to hear all the classics. Concorde 2, Brighton, Thursday 3 May, 7pm, £15
★MUSIC★
Mayday! The Musical Your first chance to see Mayday! The Musical (it pops up later throughout the Festival). The Mayday Improv troupe show off wit, musical chutzpah and comic timing. Brilliant. Komedia, Brighton, Friday 4 May, 9pm, £7/£6 Chas & Dave
For venue details see page 58 latest 7 49
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Under review Recent shows with a sprinkling of home-grown talent Easy Comedy Easy Bar’s monthly comedy night showed that stand-up comedy is anything but easy. Compere Lee Hume welcomed on stage the appropriately named Graham Standing, along with Mike Switzer, Holly Walsh, Netty Wendt and Roisin Le Bourhis who offered a counter-intuitive take on internet seduction. The latter act was a mild crowd-pleaser with lateralminded anecdotes that could have done with sharpening. Otherwise a warm and supportive crowd both on stage and off. Easy Bar, 17 April ✌✌✌
Call Artforms Productions Ltd - The production company behind all the filming for Latest 7, Latest Homes and Latest Records. We’re always making professional looking DVDs/music videos/ promotional films at the most affordable prices. Whether you’re rock, indie, hip-hop or folk, we will create the right video for you.
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All budgets catered for – from glossy MTV-style videos to filming pub gigs for your myspace page. Ring Stef now for a quote and examples of our work.
07712 588136 or artformstef@gmail.com Reginald D Hunter: Pride & Prejudice & Niggas It doesn’t get much better than Reg D Hunter. Challenging preconceptions, bringing laughter apparently effortlessly, and that low down-deep voice with a Southern twang. Tackling issues of family and expectations – as well as the usual racial and sexual politics – Mr Hunter delivered a fantastic show, with brightness and brilliance coming from the very different, but excellent, Sarah Millican ably supporting the man on his tour. JJ Whitehead beautifully rounded off both acts, having played the Krater earlier in the night too. The line-up tried out new material on the crowd. A mental feast that left you warm and satiated. Fantastic. Komedia, 15 April ✌✌✌✌✌ Victoria Nangle
James Taylor: One Man Band James Taylor was seated in front of a backdrop of red and purple light and performed the finest selection of songs spanning his long career. With witty dialogue and a slide show of personal photos, James revealed aspects of his life, drawing the audience with such charm as if he were sitting around the fire at home, talking with a bunch of old friends – an endearing touch that added to the intimacy of the show. So much craft went into the making of this delightful show. Brighton Dome, 18 April ✌✌✌✌ Bernie Smith
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Graham Standing James Taylor: One Man Band
Malarki The very least anyone can say about seven-piece Malarki is that they play really good, funky, uplifting songs very well. But you’ve also got to praise their musicianship, stage presence and showmanship. Or, rather, showwomanship. Their lead singer, Katie Evans, deserves special mention. She was just astonishing, with as much soul as Skye Edwards and all the passion of Aretha Franklin. Remarkable, particularly as this was only their second show. Radio Reverb Party, Sussex Arts Club, 19 April ✌✌✌✌ Billy Imrie
Terry Callier This Chicago-born jazz, soul and folk guitarist and singer-songwriter continues to be an awe-inspiring performer, even in the twilight of his illustrious career. The show felt like being part of an intimate audience with a master sharing his craft, rather than just another gig. Pauses between the music were filled with very human asides of a subtle, philosophical nature and then it was straight back into the business at hand – working jazz, soul, folk and R’n’B grooves that lay the foundations for his sweet songs of love (and a few of a more political bent). We came away from the night with cheeks aching from smiling so much. Komedia, 12 April ✌✌✌✌✌ Sally & Gilly
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tuesday 1 Tinariwen, Komedia, 8.30pm
dutchtub at Brighton Festival www.dutchtub.info
0800 0121795
Live music Curtis Stigers Platinum-selling singer/saxophonist responsible for pop hits in the early 90s, later jazz and soul, who has left many a housewife feeling ‘a bit giddy’. Pavilion Theatre, Worthing, 8pm, £20/£18 Jason Donovan Out of the jungle and ready to revisit his pop past. His wallet’s twitching with excitement. Dome, 7.30pm, £22.50 Lee Westwood Virtuoso classical/Spanish musician. Arthouse, 8.30pm, free Milky T + Lil’ Lost Lou + Onions For Eyes + F&P Anti-folk night bringing you DIY, lo-fi, acoustic punk, alt-rap, tweecore, electronica and other genres that sound like we’ve just made them up. Hope, 8pm, free Open Mic Brunswick, 8pm, free Redmanred + Chris Simmons + The Echo Union A rock, pop and soul band from Worthing. Sickeningly young. Joogleberry, 8pm, £5/£4 The Teenagers Young, French electro crossover crew who may have to change their name once they get to 21. Po Na Na, 9.30pm, £4 Tinariwen Poet guitarists and original soul rebels from Western Sahara, making beautiful, majestic, hypnotic music. Komedia, 8.30pm, £15
Bars and clubs Arc Expelled. Multi-genre student mash-up. 10.30pm-3am, £2/£1 before 10:30pm Audio Snide. Indie rock tunes old and new at this super-cool night for those with very tight jeans. 10pm-2am, £2 Belushi’s Revision. Student night with drink promos. 9pm-3am, free with NUS card Caroline Of Brunswick Quiz. 8.30pm, £1 Casablanca Tequila Tuesday. Party tunes with DJ Scotty Le Funk (he must be French) and that oh-so-potent wormy beverage at just £1 a shot. Yikes. 10.30pm-3am, free Creation S.E.X. It stands for ‘students expect xtra’. Very clever wordplay there. It’s a big night of alcohol-fuelled dancefloor mayhem in exile check with venue before travelling. ➧ Please See our venue directory for details
from the Event 2 which is currently being renovated. 10pm-2am, £3/free before 11pm Funky Buddha Lounge Kinky Robot. Various shades of house, electro, breaks and techno. 10:30pm-3am, £3/free before 11pm Hare & Hounds Free pool. Great for hustlers on a budget. Free The Jazz Place Roots Garden. Reggae and roots sounds all night long. 10pm-2am, £3.50/£2/2.50 Ocean Rooms Sunset Sessions. Funky house behaviour with drinks promos and other wacky stuff. £3/£2/free before 11pm Po Na Na Cavalcade Of Pop. With the everpopular Boogaloo Stu. The Teenagers play live (see Live Music). 9:30pm-3:30am, £4 Suga Qube Industry. A weekly blow-out for the hard-working bar workers and door staff of our beloved city. The slack ones can go too. 9pm-2am, free The Zap Smash Hits. DJs Sean Quinn and Mr P throw out some top pop classics to a crowd of tune-hungry drunkards. Great fun. 10pm-3am £3/£2/free before 11pm
Gay Legends Dance Toxic. Selected drinks £2 each. 11pm–4am, free Marine Tavern Nat’s Quiz Night. 9pm Marlborough Ladies’ Night. Open till 12am Queen’s Arms Spice Up Your Life! The fabulous Spice hosts her own karaoke show. 9pm R-Bar Student night. Discounted tickets for Revenge. 9pm-2am, free Revenge Student night. Drinks from £1.50. 10:30pm–3am, NUS free all night/others free before 11 then £3 Vavoom Your choice videos. Open till 4am V2 club Music videos upstairs and karaoke downstairs until 12am. 10pm-late, free
Theatre Charley’s Aunt Comedy about mistaken
identity, cross dressing, deranged uncles and ravishing ladies starring the popular Stephen Tompkinson. Theatre Royal, Brighton, 7.45pm, £16-£26 Danny The Champion Of The World Based on Roald Dahl’s best-loved book. Worthing Connaught Theatre, times and prices vary – please contact the venue The Last Confession New thriller about one of the most highly guarded institutions: The Vatican. Chichester Festival Theatre, please call for show times. £10–£32 Office Suite A double bill from Alan Bennett on the predictability of life in an office, starring Patricia Routledge. Chichester Minerva Theatre, SOLD OUT
Comedy Easy Comedy A fine collection of vetted new acts, fresh on the circuit with a top class headliner at this intimate venue by Churchill Square Shopping Centre. Easy Bar, 8pm, £3 (to charity)
Events Salsa Night Cubashe Dance Promotions host classes for all abilities. The Hanbury Club. 8.309.30pm improver level, 9.30-10.30pm beginners/intermediate/advanced. £6 for 1 class, £10 for 2 classes, £4 club entry only. Strictly For Kids Dance class for 5–15 year olds: ballroom and Latin, waltz, quickstep, rumba, cha-cha, foxtrot, tango, jive and samba. Assembly Hall, Worthing, 6.15–7pm, £3 Tea Dance With music provided by Andrew Varley. Assembly Hall, Worthing, 2pm–4.30pm, £3 includes cup of tea Worthing Flower Club Demonstrations and workshops, with visitors and new members always welcome. Info, call Jan Adams 01903 246078. Barn Theatre, Field Place, Worthing, 7.30pm, £3.50 includes coffee and biscuits.
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wednesday 2 Live music
IS NOW OPEN 1st FLOOR COCKTAIL BAR
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After The Deafening + Four Angry Dwarves + The Parody Local indie bands. Pav Tav, 8pm, free Circle Of Friends Acoustic night with local singer-songwriters. Cosmopolitan Bar, 8.30pm, free Flamenco Regular night with live music, dancing and Spanish cuisine. Don’t try to eat while dancing though, it’ll end in tears. Joogleberry, 8pm, £4 The Ian Price Quartet Brunswick, 8pm, £3 The Legendary Bee’s Mouth Open Mic Arthouse, 8.30pm, free Mono + My Seed + The Reluctant + Drag Race White Noise rock night. Pressure Point, 8pm, £4/3 Open Mic London Unity, 9pm, free Thomas Denver Jonsson + Matt English Jonsson is a Swedish acoustic songwriter with a laid-back, almost roostsy style. Matt English is indeed English – he’s a great blues and roots influenced local boy in fact. Prince Albert, 8pm, £4/£3 Wednesday Night Originals Weekly showcase of local bands. Portland, 7.30pm, £3
Bars and clubs Arc Don’t Tell Ya Mum And Dad. Intelligent dance tunes with bits of electro, space crunk and indie in the mix. 10pm-late, £3/£2 Audio Supercharged. Top breaks and beats action. 10:30pm-2:30am £3-£5 The Beach Born In The 80s. The decade we all all love to hate. Or is it hate to love? Either way, you’ll hear probably hear some Wham. 10pmlate, £3/80p
Brighton Gloucester The Pit. Gnarly rock and metal for those who like their dancefloor aggressive and sweaty. 10pm-2am, £3/£2 Casablanca Fun Ki Disco. Two floors of upbeat funkery. Upstairs is a Spanish theme – buy Sangria and get free tapas. 9:30pm-2am, £2/£1/free before 11pm Funky Buddha Lounge Sabotage. Indie rock stylings for lovers of all things guitar-based. 10.30pm-3am, £2 Honeyclub No Nonsense. Eclectic mix for students and the official night of the University of Sussex SU Sports Federation. 10pm-3am, £2.50-£5 The Juggler Quiz. General and themed rounds. Prizes available. 8.30pm KooKlub Current and classic indie at this new night. 10pm-3am, £3 Suga Qube Funk N Stuff. Raregroove, funk, disco and house from DJ Dave Morpeth. Free Volks Sessions. Reggae and dubstep. 10pmlate, £4
Gay Caledonian 2 Dave Lynn – cabaret. 9.30pm Marlborough Quiz. Prizes for winners. 8pm The PV Quiz. 8pm Queen’s Arms Midweek Cabaret Party. With Cassidy Connors and DJ Andy B. 9.00pm R-Bar Go Double Baby. From 9pm, any double just £1 extra. Open till 2am Revenge Strut your stuff at 1970s heaven. Selected drinks just £1.50. 10.30pm–3am, free entry if dressed to theme or £3/£2 before 11pm Vavoom Your choice videos. Happy hour till 6pm. Open till 4am V2 Club Music videos upstairs and karaoke downstairs until 12am. 10pm–late
Theatre Charley’s Aunt Comedy about mistaken identity, cross dressing, deranged uncles and ravishing ladies starring the popular Stephen Tompkinson. Theatre Royal, Brighton, 7.45pm, £16–£26 Danny The Champion Of The World Based on Roald Dahl’s best-loved book. Worthing Connaught Theatre, times and prices vary – please contact the venue The Last Confession The world premiere of this new thriller about one of the most highly guarded institutions: The Vatican. Chichester Festival Theatre, please call for show times. £10–£32 Office Suite A double bill from Alan Bennett on the predictability of life in an office, starring Patricia Routledge. Chichester Minerva Theatre, SOLD OUT Sing-A-Long-A-ABBA Tribute act with sing-alongs, fancy competitions, the works. Sounds camp as Christmas and quite possibly fantastic. Pavilion Theatre, Worthing, 8pm, £16/£14
Comedy Mark Thomas The controversial and intelligent funnyman best known for TV’s The Mark Thomas Product brings his wares to the Concorde. Concorde 2, 8pm, £14/£10
Events The Brighton Moment Join Julie Burchill, William Shaw and more for a literary cabaret based on life in Brighton. Sussex Arts Club, 7.30-10.15pm, £5/£4
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thursday 3 Live music Are You Taking The Mic? Original performers only, no covers for this open mic night. Play ‘Streets Of London’ and you’ll be taken round the back and melted down. Possibly. Register by emailing andersdmoney@yahoo.co.uk. Providence, 8pm, free Cella Sessions Open mic night for original music. Sign up by 8pm. Cella, 7.30pm, free Chas’n’Dave + Silvermaker + The Paul Cox Band Cockney legends who are suddenly back in fashion again. Well, when we say fashion... Concorde 2, 7pm, £15 Gedogen + YUUKI + MiMi Soya Local hard rock crew formed at Sussex University. Pav Tav, 8pm, free Jamestown Union Superb alt-country and Americana-style band from Brighton. Brunswick, 8pm, £3 Open mic Singer-songwriters welcome. Hare & Hounds, 9pm, free Patient + Dayz Like Theze + Coup Cable Club local band night. Pressure Point, 8pm, £4/£3 Simon Kirke Ex-Free and Bad Company drummer, here performing an intimate show playing guitar and piano, telling rock’n’roll stories and singing some classics as well as his own material. Komedia, 8pm, £12.50 Slip Jam:B Long-running hip hop night with live performers, open mics and open decks. Hosted by Hinesy Hines. Hope, 8pm, free Tin Cup Collective Raw jazz funk fusion. Arthouse, 8.30pm, free Tune Session Led by Will Duke and Dan Quinn. A Lewes Folk Club event. Royal Oak, Lewes, 8pm, free
Bars and clubs Audio Dynamite Boogaloo. Legendary pop/kitsch blow-out, popular with the students. 10pm-2am, £4/£3 Bar Bamboogy Live DJs. 8pm-2am, free The Beach Big Toons. House, dance and R’n‘B classics with The Brighton Allstars. 10:30pm3am, £4/free before 11pm Brighton Gloucester Mad For It. Indie anthems, record release celebrations and more boozey behaviour from the hard working Lout Promotions team. 10pm-2am, £3/£1.50 Casablanca Sambanation. Sunny Brazilian flavours. 9.30pm-2am, £2/£1 Cosmopolitan Bar Spinner Stays On. If the DJ’s good enough to stay on, let them know! If not, vote them off. Don’t throw cabbages, hot Bovril or gravel though, you might damage the decks. 7.30pm, free Creation Floorfillers. Pop encounters of the very biggest and boldest kind. 10pm-2am, £2/90p Funky Buddha Lounge Warm Your Soul. Classic soul and funk for a slinky night out. 10pm-3am, £2/free Honeyclub Contagious. Classic house. 10pmlate, £4/£2 Pav Tav The Resurrection. Indie for the masses in this popular, centrally located sweatbox. 10pm-2am, £3/£1.50 Suga Qube Weekend warm-up with a mix of soulful and slamming beats from Lee Garrett and friends. 9pm–2am, free Sussex Arts Club Dream Sequence No 4. Electro meets art. 7.30pm-2am, £5/£4 Volks Horn-It. Drum and bass plus trance equals banging night out. 10pm–late, £tbc Water Margin & Kabuki A private launch party for the bar and club formerly known as Sumo. Invite only The Zap Chopper Choons. Kitsch and cool 70s grooves, hip hop and proper R’n’B tunes for discerning dancers. And sweaty students.10pm3am, £4/free for NUS
Gay Charles Street Bar Mad Cow. Super-cheap drinks at this popular night. 8-11pm, £1 check with venue before travelling. ➧ Please See our venue directory for details
Charles Street Club Religion. House night hosted by Joan Bond with DJs Richard Jones and Tony B on the decks. 10.30pm-3am, £5/£4 flyer/£3 NUS. Harlequin Quiz and gameshow with Lady James. 8pm–2am, free Legends Dance Squeeze. 11pm–4am, free Marine Tavern Man Trap. 12pm–12am Marlborough Free pool 6pm onwards, then Killer Pool. 8pm The PV Cocktails v Clittails. 6pm-9pm Queen’s Arms Karaoke with Betty. 9pm R-Bar Cabaret with Maisie Trollette and John Bruzon. 9:30pm Revenge Manzone. Back by popular demand! Strictly men only. Stripper from midnight. 10.30pm–3am, £2 Star Inn Big Dave’s Quiz. Open till midnight Vavoom Thirsty Thursday. Music videos all night long. Open till 4am V2 Club Music videos upstairs and karaoke downstairs until 12am. Open 10pm-late
Office Suite A double bill from Alan Bennett on the predictability of life in an office, starring Patricia Routledge. Chichester Minerva Theatre, SOLD OUT
Theatre
Events
Charley’s Aunt Comedy about mistaken identity, cross dressing, deranged uncles and ravishing ladies starring the popular Stephen Tompkinson. Theatre Royal Brighton, 7.45pm, £16–£26 Danny The Champion Of The World Based on Roald Dahl’s best-loved book. Worthing Connaught Theatre, times and prices vary – please contact the venue The Last Confession New thriller about one of the most highly guarded institutions: The Vatican. (Pre-show talk before tonight’s performance) Chichester Festival Theatre, please call for show times. £10–£32
Art and Craft Classes For children aged 18 months to five years old. A fun weekly arts and craft class. Malling Community Centre, Lewes. For more info/to book please call 01273 488616. Catherine Aitken Designer handbag and accessories preview and sale. Sejuice, 56 Gardner Street. 6–9pm. Free Global Development: Small World, Same Difference? With the Institute Of Development Studies asking the question ‘Do people’s opinions make a difference to local and national politics?’ Jubilee Library, 6.30–8pm, £3
Comedy Clapped Out Comedy Nick Doody headlines with excellent support from Marek Larwood, Tomi Walamies and Çhris Pacey, ably compered by Andrew O'Neill. The Joogleberry, 7.30pm, £7 Maydays Improvised Comedy Drop-In class Your chance to join in with the mirth-making and learn improvisation from the most respected improv troupe in Sussex. Garton House, 7.30pm, £7 The Treason Show Topical skit, song and sketch show, keeping you up to date and seeing the funny side of world affairs. Komedia, 7pm, £15
Simon Kirke, Komedia, 8pm
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friday 4 Charles Street Club Revo. New funky electro club night with DJ Tom Logan. 10.30pm-3am, £5 Harlequin Shaft. Strictly men only. 9pm-4am, £5 Legends Bar Pre-Yo-Yo. 11am-5am Legends Dance Yo-Yo. Commercial dance and chart sounds with DJ Alex Baker. 11pm-4am, £5/free before midnight Marlborough Live DJ from 9pm. Open till 2am The PV Easy, cheesy Friday. 12pm-1am Queen’s Arms Andy B’s Camp Attack. Open till 1am R–Bar Official Lollipop warm-up party. Open till 2am Revenge Lollipop Vs Kinky Dangerous. DJ Dulcie Danger banging away upstairs with the fabulous Lollipop Girls hosting downstairs. 10.30pm–5am, £5 before 11pm, £7 after. Rehab NRG. Funky house night. 9pm-3:30am, £7 or £5 before 12am Vavoom Bar Boyz. Promos till 6pm and when certain tracks play. Dance music videos all night Open till 6am V2 Club Music videos upstairs and karaoke downstairs until 12am. 10pm-late, members free
The Leadheads, Red Roaster, 8pm
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Live music Aesop Stone & The Experience + The Magnificent Toe String + Sumerian Kyngs Superb and uncanny Hendrix lookalike tops the bill. Go marvel at his freak-ish, clone-like genes. Pressure Point, 7.30pm, £4 Bobby Conn + Last Man Standing Eccentric and flamboyant cult American who blends marvellous melodies with traditional song structures. Check out his excellent new album, King For A Day. Audio, 7.30pm, £8 The Caretakers Blues. Arthouse, 8.30pm, free Contort Yourself Garage, no-wave and jazz night with bands and DJs. Hope, 8pm, £2.50 The Diagonals + Wood’n’Juice Rock, jazz and experimental sounds. Providence, 8pm, £1 The Dolly Parton Story Adventures in country music, as performed by Mandy Winters. Pavilion Theatre, 7.30pm, £10-£14 Elle + Joe Morris Singer-songwriter from the USA. Cella, 7.30pm, £5 The Informers Strutting soul, R’n’B and funk. Neptune, 8.30pm, free Jim Mullen Organ Trio With Stan Sulzmann on sax. A Brighton Jazz Club event. Sussex Arts Club, 7.30pm, £12/£10 The Kalm Eastbourne-based rock outfit. Brunswick, 8pm, £3 Long Man Morris Local morris dancing troupe. Take a foreigner with you and watch the bewilderment on their face. The Beachcomber, Seaford, 8.15pm Return Of The Bump Squad Eight-piece original band with the P-Funk sound of George Clinton. Joogleberry, 8pm, £7 Stephen Simmons + Laura Jane Kauffman + The Leadheads Demon-battling Americana sounds in the vein of Steve Earle and Ryan Adams. LJK is a lovely local singer-songwriter, while The Leadheads are a passionately melodic new project from the Threewheeler camp. Red Roaster, 8pm, £6 Stiff Little Fingers At the forefront of the punk explosion back in the late 70s, Northern Ireland’s Jake Burns and co. continue to stay true to their roots. Concorde 2, 7pm, £13.50
Bars and clubs Arc Candy. Hip hop, soul and ragga featuring resident DJs Da Playaz and guests. 10.30pm–4am, £8/£5 before 12am Ali Cats Flow. Electro, breaks and booty bass in this subterranean hangout. 8pm-12am, free Aqua Bar 70s, 80s and 90s night. What’s wrong with the poor old noughties? Huh? 9pm2am, free Audio Against The Grain. Mammoth breaks session. 11pm-4am £10/£8 The Beach Glasshouse presents Ibiza with Love. Filthy electro house direct from the White
Isle. 10.30pm-5am £8/£7/£6 Belushi’s Madness. Sexy chart cheese and club classics. £2 selected drinks until midnight. 10pm–3am, free Brighton Gloucester Kick Out the Jams. Buttkicking indie. 10.30pm–2am, £4/£3 Casablanca Mirror Ball. Funky disco, as you would expect from the name. 10.30pm-3am, £6/£5/£4 Core Club Mo Money. Hip hop with Bill Blast. 10pm-4am, £8/£5 Cosmopolitan All Time Top 100. One of Brighton’s most diverse music-focused nights out. 8pm-2am, free Creation Popdaparty. Three rooms of commercial tunery to cop off to. 9pm-3am, £5/free before 11pm Engine Rooms Lowlife. Rock and indie mix in this lovably scuzzy club. 10.30pm-4am, £5 Enigma Resistance. Goth and industrial. 113am £5/4 Funky Buddha Thank Funk It’s Friday. With DJs Sean Quinn and Stuart Ross. 10pm-3am £8/£6 before 11pm Funky Buddha 3am. Early morning acid for insomniac dancefloor dynamos. Tonight with Dulcie Danger on the decks. 3pm-7am £8/£5 Funky Fish Funk, soul and classic rock ‘n’ roll with a party vibe. 10pm-3am, £6/£5 before 11 Honeyclub Hard South. BK album launch party. 10-30pm-5am, £10/£8 Jazz Place Basement Soul. Sexy sounds for a smooth night out. 10:30pm-3am, £5/£4 Komedia Da Do Ron Ron and Her Little Sisters. Girly tunes from Blondie to the Long Blondes. 11pm-3am, £5 KooKlub Something Of Nothing. Fun club night with R’n‘B and house music. 10pm-3am, £4/£3 Pav Tav Rip It Up. Indie anthems to kick-start a weekend of excess. 10pm-2am, £4/£3 Po Na Na Somewhere In The Universe There Must Be Something Better Than Man. Electro, pop and indie floor-fillers with a great vibe. 10pm-3am, £5/£3 Suga Qube Electronica of all kinds from the Suga Qube Allstars team. 9pm–late, free Sussex Arts Club DJ Manello. Funk and soul. 10.30pm-2am, £5/£4 Volks White Rhino. Dirty electro upstairs, hip hop downstairs. 11pm-4am, £6/£4 before 12am Water Margin and Kabuki Opening night for the brand new bar and club (formerly Sumo) with DJ Mike Panteli. Water Margin open 12pm-12am, free. Kabuki 11pm-late, £6 The Zap Sexxxy. Dirty electro from Just Le Funk and Kasey. 11pm-4am, £8/£6
Gay Candy Bar Pop Rock Vs Booty Call. 9pm-morning. Charles Street Bar Fairylea. Cheesy, camp tracks with DJs Ruby Roo & Connie Conway. 10.30pm-late
Theatre Charley’s Aunt Comedy about mistaken identity, cross dressing, deranged uncles and ravishing ladies starring Stephen Tompkinson. Theatre Royal, Brighton, 7.45pm, £16–£26 Dangerous Corner Ian Dickens Productions present J B Priestley’s classic thriller.The Capitol, Horsham, please call for times and prices Danny The Champion Of The World Based on Roald Dahl’s best-loved book. Worthing Connaught Theatre, times and prices vary – please contact the venue The Dolly Parton Story Mandy Winters, backed by a full band, explores the triumphs and heartaches of Dolly’s life. Worthing Pavilion Theatre, 7.30pm, £14/£12.50 The Dustman Family show presented by the Lyngo Theatre Company. The Hawth, Studio, 11am, £5.50, family ticket (4 people: £20) The European Ballet Present Coppelia Ballet with music by Delibes. The Hawth, Main Theatre, 7pm, £17.50/£15, children: £12 Gite A La Mer Audio comedy about a couple living in a beach hut because of house prices. Presented in an actual beach hut on Hove Lawns! 48, The Beach Huts, 12pm–8pm, free The Last Confession New thriller about one of the most highly guarded institutions: The Vatican. Chichester Festival Theatre, please call for show times. £10–£32 Office Suite A double bill from Alan Bennett on the predictability of life in an office. Chichester Minerva Theatre, SOLD OUT Radio Al Smith’s captivating one-man show, set in 1969. Komedia Studio, 7–8pm, £6 Richard O’Brien’s Mephistopheles Smith Hymns and devilish tales with the Evangelist For Hell. Sussex Arts Club, 9pm–10.30pm, £5 preview night
Comedy Kronenbourg Krater Comedy Club Mitch Benn, Ben Norris, Steven K Amos and MC Dan Nightingale tickle your funnybones. Komedia, 7.30pm, £12/£10 Mayday! The Musical Brilliant improv with music. Komedia, 9pm, £7/£6 The Treason Show Topical skit, song and sketch show. Komedia, 7pm, £15
Events To Have & To Hold – Bridal & Flower Festival Exhibition of wedding dresses and floral displays, plus a candle-lit concert, children's activities and more. St Symphorian's Church, Durrington Hill, Durrington, 9.30am7.30pm. Info from Margaret Allison 01903 261772 or email: allison1@totalise.co.uk check with venue before travelling. ➧ Please See our venue directory for details
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saturday 5 Live music
Gay
Barrier Dutch + The Beautiful Word + Joe Hunt Folk rock night. Providence, 8pm, £1 The Dials recent winners of the Fopp Unsigned competition, a crazy amalgamation of garage, country rock and weird folk. Brunswick, 8pm, £3 The Fog Classic rock (nothing to do with J Mascis And The Fog). Hare & Hounds, 9pm, free Guille + Easy Sister + Middlehill Pressure Point, 8pm, £4/£3 My Name Is Red + Muzikashii + Subliminals Indie rock. Ocean Rooms, 8pm, £5 Orkest De Ereprijs Dutch contemporary music ensemble. Mandela Hall, Sussex University, 7.30pm, £7/£3 Return Of The Bump Squad Eight-piece funk band. Joogleberry, 8pm, £7 Saidi Kanda Tanzanian multi-instrumentalist and a former member of Remi Ongala’s Super Matimila. Pavilion Theatre, Brighton, 1pm, £7.50 Soul Reality Soul, funk and psychedelic grooves from London. Cella, 7.30pm, £6 Spyros Dendrinos Classical guitarist. Unitarian Church, 8pm, £tbc Yvonne Sanchez Acclaimed jazz singer with Cubano-Braziliano Bossa material. St Pauls Church, 7.30pm, £10
Brighton Gloucester Monkey. Wild Fruit’s Saturday nighter. 10pm-4am, NUS £5 all night, others £5 before 11pm/£7 before midnight/£9 after Caledonian 2 Sophie – cabaret. 9.30pm Candy Bar FTPA. Homo-electric disco with DJs W*nker and A-dam. 10pm-5am, £5 Charles Street Club Nervous Twitch by Shibby Shabblers. Top indie night. 11pm-3am, £5 Harlequin Titty la Camp on stage. 9pm-4am, free before 11pm/£5 after Legends Bar Pre-Ignition.11am–5am Legends Dance Ignition. Big tunes with DJ Peter Castle. 11pm-4am, £5/free before 11pm Queen’s Arms Julie Glitter’s Karaoke Party. 9pm Revenge Queercarnage. DJs Dusty O and Nik C. All drinks £2 before 12. 10.30pm-6am, free before 11pm/£5 before 12am/£7 after 12am/£3 after 3am, NUS £3 Star Inn Proud To Bear night. 8pm-1am Vavoom Theme night. Open till 6am V2 Club Theme night continues. Open from 10pm-late, members get free entry, others £2/free before midnight
Bars and clubs Ali Cats Uni-Fi. Nu-skool and old-skool breaks. 8pm-12am, free Arc Holdup! Brighton’s favourite indie night.10pm–4am, £5 Audio Stompa Phunk. The very best in underground house. 11pm-4am £8/£6 The Beach Fever. Disco and funk at this upbeat weekend session. 10.30pm-4am £10/£8 Belushi’s Utopia. 80s classics and club anthems. 10pm–3am, free Casablanca Batcuda. Live Latino and classic tunes. 11pm-4am, £7/£6/£5 Concorde 2 Zapback first Birthday. Old-skool from Ratpack and Altern 8. 11 - 5am £8.50 Core Club Mo Money. Hip hop with Bill Blast. 10pm-4am £8/£5 Creation Anthems. Bangin’ weekly party. 9pmlate, £10/free before 10pm Engine Room Lowlife. Rock and indie mix in this lovably scuzzy club. 10.30pm-4am, £5 Funky Buddha Lounge Buddha Soul. Funk and soul of course. 10pm-2am £10/£7 Funky Buddha Lounge Bright ’n‘ Early. Late night house. 3am-8am, £8 Funky Fish Funk, soul and classic rock ‘n’ roll with a party vibe. 10pm-3am, £6/£5 before 11 The Forager Heaven Knows I’m Miserable Now. Indie pop. 8pm-late, free Hectors House DISC Indie/electro with Tim Jenson and residents. 9pm-2am, free Honeyclub Seven Sins. Funky big room house with DJ Tom Novy. 10.30pm-5am, £12/£7 Jazz Place Street Jazz. Russ Dewbury spins jazz, funk, Afro and latin. 10.30pm-3am £6/£5 Komedia Stick It On. The night that gives you 15 minutes of DJ fame. 11pm-3am, £8 KooKlub Sweet Boutique. Sugary fun with a house soundtrack. 10pm-4am, free Lo Lounge Born To Dance presents Born Again. Club classics with Graeme Park. 10.30pm-3am £7/£6 The Penthouse L’Amour Electronique. Synth pop. 8pm-late, free Po Na Na Good Turn. Modern soul, electro and pop. 10pm-3:30am £10/£8 Suga Qube Electronica of all kinds from the SugaQube Allstars team. 9pm–late, free Sussex Arts Club Mojo-to-go-go. Rare and not-so-rare Mod and Psych. 9pm-2am £5/£4 Volks Psychdelicious. Psy-trance. 11pm-5am £6/£5 Water Margin and Kabuki DJs Irfan, Tomlin, Beatnik, Sketchy and Andy Bird rock the house at the brand new bar and club. Water Margin open 12pm-12am, free. Kabuki 11pm-late, £6 The Zap Pussycat presents Moulin Rouge. Funky house with a French theme. 10.30pm5am, £12/£10 check with venue before travelling. ➧ Please See our venue directory for details
Theatre Bite-Size – Short and Sweet Best of this year’s Sydney/Melbourne International 10-min play festivals. Suits ages 14+. Cella at Sanctuary Café, £6/£5, 12:30 pm Charley’s Aunt Comedy starring Stephen Tompkinson. Theatre Royal, Brighton, 2.30pm and 7.45pm, £16–£26 Dangerous Corner Ian Dickens Productions present J B Priestley’s classic thriller.The Capitol, Horsham, call for times and prices Danny The Champion Of The World Based on Roald Dahl’s best-loved book. Worthing Connaught Theatre, times and prices vary – please contact the venue The Dustman Family show presented by the Lyngo Theatre Company. The Hawth, Studio, 11am, £5.50, family ticket (4 people): £20 Futurology: A Global Revue A darkly comic cabaret, looking at global issues. Brighton Dome Corn Exchange, 8pm, £15–£18 Gite A La Mer Audio comedy about living in a beach hut. Presented in an actual hut on Hove Lawns! 48, The Beach Huts, 12pm–8pm, free James Dean is Dead (Long Live James Dean) A look at the man behind the myth. Ages 18+. Cella@The Sanctuary Café, 3.15pm, £8/£6 The Last Confession New thriller about one of the most highly guarded institutions: The Vatican. Chichester Festival Theatre, please call for show times. £10–£32 Lunatics Intense and physical look at the formation of the Christian Church. Explicit language/violence – ages 16+ only. Nightingale Theatre, 8pm, £6.50/£8.50 The Merchant Of Venice One of Shakespeare's best-known plays. Book through
The Treason Show, Komedia, 7pm
www.brightonfestivalfringe.org.uk. Brighton Little Theatre, 7.45pm, £7.50/£8.50 Radio Al Smith’s captivating one-man show, set in 1969. Komedia Studio, 7–8pm, £6 Richard III By William Shakespeare Updated for a terrorised 21st century. New Venture Theatre, 7.30pm-10.30pm, £7.50 Richard O’Brien’s Mephistopheles Smith Hymns and devilish tales with the Evangelist For Hell. Sussex Arts Club, 9-10.30pm, £9/£7 Run Lola Run German cult film, with live soundtrack from indie crew The Bays. Brighton Dome Concert Hall, 8pm, £16, SOLD OUT Shoe Baby Puppet Show Sing-along adventure. Ages 2–6. Marlborough Theatre, 4pm and 5pm, £6 Simon Armitage And Robert Macfarlane Exploring the modern resonance of Sir Gawain And The Green Knight. Brighton Dome Pavilion Theatre, 7.30pm, £7.50 Urban Sensations Urban dance and music. The Hawth, Main Theatre, 8pm, £10 advance, £12.50 door Vienna Festival Ballet Present Swan Lake The well-known love story set to stunning music by Tchaikovsky. Worthing Pavilion Theatre, 2.30pm and 7.30pm, £14–£19 Waking Drama about love and sex by Rachel Welch. Cella at Sanctuary Café, 2–2.50pm, £6/£5
Comedy Comedy Club 4 Kids Stand-up comedy with regular circuit comics editing their set for kids. Suitable for ages 6+. Komedia, 2pm, £6 Jonathan Kay – The World Famous Fool A jester for the 21st century. No 20, 8.30pm, £12/£8.50 Kronenbourg Krater Comedy Club Mitch Benn, Ben Norris, Steven K Amos and MC Dan Nightingale tickle your funnybones. Komedia, 7pm and 10.30pm, £16 Mayday! The Musical Brilliant improv with music. Komedia Studio, 9pm, £7/6 Priorite A Gauche – Remastered The French double act arrive at the cow on the Steine. Udderbelly, 9pm, £12/£10 Robin Fry and Katy Schutte – Rock Historian and Bring Me Einstein Two members of the Maydays with their stand-up shows. Marlborough Theatre, 10.30pm, £6/£5 The Treason Show Topical skit, song and sketch show. Komedia, 7pm, £15
THIS ADVERT for just
£20
Events
a week
Brighton Tango Ball Performances by top Argentinian dancers plus a beginners’ lesson. King Alfred Ballroom Suite, 7pm, £18/£14 City Books 21st Birthday Literary Lunch Join crime writer Peter James and a surprise guest. The Old Market, 12pm, £30 (incl lunch) Club Class Brighton Exploring what happens when you break your codes of conduct, using bad behaviour, clothing, surveillance or body language in the North Laine. Micro classes hosted by experts. Book online: www.frenchmottershead.com. Jubilee Library, 12–5pm, free. £10 deposit required. Open House Farmer's Market and Street Party Local food, arts and crafts, raffle, kids entertainment, BBQ and exhibitions. Open House Pub, Fiveways, Brighton. Market Stalls open 12pm–5pm, entertainment 12pm–late The Poetry Brothel Poetic one-on-ones with The Young Hanoverians. Hanover Massage Parlour, 10am–6pm, free Radio Club Children’s event delving into the world of radio. Worthing Museum, 01903 221448 10am-12pm, free Sow The Wind, Reap The Whirlwind Refugee writers talk of their experiences. Ages 14+. Friends Meeting House, 7-9pm, £6/£5 To Have & To Hold – Bridal & Flower Festival Dresses, flowers and more. St. Symphorian's Church, Durrington Hill, Durrington, info: Margaret Allison 01903 261772 or allison1@totalise.co.uk, 9.30am–6pm
Call Kate
818150
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Sunday 6
THIS ADVERT for just
András Schiff, Glyndebourne, 3pm
£20
a week
Call Kate
818150 Enjoy the KOBA ‘Happy hour’ Two cocktails for the price of one between 5-7pm every day in the front bar. Apply for free K-list membership at www.kobauk.com
135 Western Road, Brighton BN1 2LA www.kobauk.com
Photograph: Sheila Rock
Functions rooms available for all kinds of parties of 10-190 guests Free venue hire Sunday – Thursday contact info@kobauk.com or call Tel: 01273 720059
MADWHACKER PRODUCTIONS presents
Maddie Live 'Talking Up the Fringe' For the first time ever, the Brighton Festival Fringe brings you a hot new talk show. Come and meet the stars of this year’s Festival as they tell all and perform like never before.
May 7, 2007 – The Beginning Featuring Nick Stockman, Holly Payton, Richard Harris, Damien Barr, Ian Seville, Flamenco Con Fusion, Boutique and Friday Night Hero. Tickets: £7/£5 2 For 1 Brighton Dome Ticket Office Tel : 01273 709 709 Venue: The Hanbury Club 83 St. George’s Road, Brighton www.maddielive.com
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Live music András Schiff World famous pianist, conductor and chamber musician performing Bach’s Six English Suites. Glyndebourne, 3pm, £10-£30 Festival Of Brass Brighton & Hove City Brass perform popular and unusual brass band music. Elipse Deck, 1pm, free Gypsy Squat Pop Project + Alice McLaughlin + Lana Eastern European swing, Gallic French accordion and southern blues. Joogleberry, 8pm, £7 Jeremy Attwood Easy-going lounge. Brunswick, 3pm, free Loz Netto Ex-Sniff ’n’ The Tears. Neptune, 8.30pm, free Mamapalooza UK A celebration of motherhood through music and humour. West Hill Community Centre, 3pm, £5/£4 Miss Mandy & The Make Believes Jazz Quartet Jazz and ballads. The Gardens, Kensington Gardens, 3pm and 6pm, free Ocean Delay + The Sarah Haywood Band Acoustic vibes. Pav Tav, 8pm, free Onslaught + Suspiria + Evile + Son Of Science Nihilistic veteran hardcore crew. Not for fans of Norah Jones. Concorde 2, 4pm, £10 Short Warning + Karmatones + A Man Down Pressure Point, 8pm, £4/3 Yvonne Sanchez Acclaimed jazz singer with Cubano-Braziliano Bossa material. St Pauls Church, 7.30pm, £10
Bars and clubs Audio Catskills/Ninja Tune present Solid Steel feat DJ Food and Ollie Teeba. 10pm-2am, £8/£7 Beach Obsession vs Heart And Soul. Hip hop and garage. 10.30pm-5am, £7 Beach Rebel Wild Fruit After Party. The madness continues. 3am-7am, £6 Concorde 2 Soul Survivors. Northern Soul allnighter. 10pm-6am, £12.50
Creation Wild Fruit Wag’s Ball. Electro house from Seamus Haaji. 3pm-7am, £12/£10/£9/£8 Funky Buddha Lounge Warm Your Soul Twelve DJs: one dancefloor. 9pm-2am, £8/5 Funky Buddha Lounge Unkool vs Pork Chop Express. Breaks and electro. 2am-8am, £8/£5 Honeyclub God’s Kitchen. Tech house from Paul Oakenfold. 10.30pm-5am, £tbc Jazz Rooms Street Jazz Special. Dancefloor jazz from Ricardo Severe. 10pm-2am, £5 King and Queen Strawberry Circus. Beats and bands to support Africa. 12am-2pm, £tbc Suga Qube Carry On Sunday. House with John Byrne, Make: Waves and Charmain. Free Volks House session from Lee Smith (Kliks). 11pm-4am, £tbc The Zap Front Of House. Funky electro house. 11pm-5am, £10/£8
Gay Caledonian 2 Jamming with Jamie and Josh, then Miss Jason – cabaret. 3:30pm/8pm Candy Bar Club Tropicana. From 9pm, free Charles Street Club Sunday Service. Religion’s new Sunday night party. 10.30pm-3am, £4 Legends Dance Embrace.11pm-4am, free The PV Matty Eeles provides music. 6pm Queen’s Arms Super Sunday! Cabaret with Davina Sparkle at 5.15pm then Betty’s Karaoke Show. Open till 11pm Revenge Dance, chart and funky house. 10.30pm–3am, £2 before midnight then £3 Star Inn Bears’ Beer Bash! 4pm-late Vavoom Chill-out music videos all day. Open till 3am
Theatre 'Bite-Size' - Short and Sweet Best of this year's Sydney/Melbourne International 10-min play festivals. Suits ages 14+. Cella @ Sanctuary Café, £6/£5, 12:30 pm
Futurology: A Global Revue A darkly comic cabaret looking at global issues. Brighton Dome Corn Exhange, 8pm, £15-£18 Gite A La Mer Audio comedy about a couple living in a beach hut, presented in an actual beach hut on Hove Lawns! 48, The Beach Huts, 12pm–8pm, free The Last Confession New thriller about one of the most highly guarded institutions: The Vatican. Chichester Festival Theatre, please call for show times. £10-£32 Lunatics Intense and physical look at the formation of the Christian Church. Explicit language/violence – ages 16+ only. Nightingale Theatre, (post-performance discussion tonight) 8pm, £6.50/£8.50 The Merchant Of Venice One of Shakespeare's best-known plays. Book through the Brighton Festival at www.brightonfestivalfringe.org.uk. Brighton Little Theatre, 7.45pm, £7.50/£8.50 Office Suite A double bill from Alan Bennett starring Patricia Routledge. Chichester Minerva Theatre, SOLD OUT Our Times Productions Presents Follies Legendary musical featuring Stephen Sondheim’s Tony Award-winning score. Worthing Pavilion Theatre, 7.30pm, £12-£15 Radio Al Smith’s captivating one-man show, set in 1969. Komedia Studio, 7-8pm, £6 Richard III By William Shakespeare The classic updated for a terrorised 21st century. New Venture Theatre, 2.30pm-5.30pm, £7.50 Richard O’Brien’s Mephistopheles Smith Hymns and devilish tales with the Evangelist For Hell. Sussex Arts Club, 9pm-10.30pm, £9/£7 Russian Cossack Dance Company 50 dancers, musicians and singers perform to an orchestra. The Capitol, Horsham, please call for times and prices Shoe Baby Puppet Show Sing-along adventure. Ages 2-6. Marlborough Theatre, 4pm and 5pm, £6 Showstoppers Golden moments from successful musicals, with orchestra. Ralli Hall Community Centre, 3-4.45pm, £8/£6 Waking Drama by Rachel Welch. Cella @ Sanctuary Café, 2pm-2.50pm, £6/£5
Comedy Bent Double Laquisha Jonz, Sally Ann Hayward and Kerry Godliman, MC’d by Zoe Lyons. Komedia, 6.30pm, £9.50/£7.50 Jerry Sadowitz – Comedian, Magician, Psychopath! The controversial Scot returns. Udderbelly, 9pm, £13.50/£11.50 Jonathan Kay – The World Famous Fool A jester for the 21st century. No. 20, 8.30pm, £12/£8.50 Kronenbourg Krater Comedy Club Mitch Benn, Ben Norris, Steven K Amos and MC Dan Nightingale. Komedia, 8pm, £9/£6 students Mayday! The Musical Brilliant improv with music. Komedia Studio, 9pm, £7/£6 Pluck – Musical Arson! Comedy string quartet. Udderbelly, 3.15pm, £10/£8 Sidesplitters Two established acts and three new acts. The Providence, 8pm, £4
Events Double Delight – Celebrity Concert Poetry, prose, comic verse and song with actress Susan Jameson, author Simon Brett and more. Ages 10+. Friends Meeting House 6–8pm, £12/£8 The Liberace Of Baghdad Filmmaker Sean McAllister and Rory McCarthy – The Guardian's Baghdad correspondent – present a screening of the documentary filmed amidst the violence in Iraq. Tickets are only available from Brighton Festival Ticket Office: 01273 709 709. The Old Market. 7pm, £7.50 To Have And To Hold – Bridal And Flower Festival Exhibition of wedding dresses and floral displays, plus lots more. St. Symphorian's Church, Durrington Hill, Durrington, info from Margaret Allison 01903 261772 or email: allison1@totalise.co.uk, 10am–7pm check with venue before travelling. ➧ Please See our venue directory for details
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Live music Brighton Festival Youth Choir Performing choral classics from Purcell to Britten, and works by composer Howard Skempton to celebrate his 60th birthday. With Glen Capra on piano. Pavilion Theatre, 1pm, £7.50 Catnap + Everyone To The Anderson + Exxon Valdeze + Furniture Sound Pressure Point, 8pm, £4/£3.50 Charivari Agréable Hispanic Baroque songs and dances. St George’s Church, 8pm, £5-£16 Diamond Family Archive Folk Club event with these country miserabalists. Greys, 8.30pm, £5 The Good Cuts + Guru Sales Uptempo bluesy rock‘n’roll from the headliners at The Stash, a regular alt-indie live showcase. Hope, 8pm, £4/£3 James Burton & Billy Swan Two minor legends of rock’n’roll get together for the first time. Burton used to play in Elvis Presley’s band and has collaborated with many over the years, while Swan is a celebrated singer songwriter and producer. They will be playing with The Grundy Pritchard Band. Concorde 2, 7.30pm, £20 Lou Rhodes + Passenger + Fink + Elly Jackson A Music & Words night with the exLamb singer, whose first album was nominated for the Mercury Prize. Komedia, 7pm, £12 Odemba OK Jazz All Stars The cream of Congolese rumba, recreating the golden days of Franco’s OK Jazz, who were a dominant force back in the early 60s. Features some original members and guitar legend Pap Noel. Sallis Benney, 7.30pm, £16 Parka Glaswegian four-piece who’ve just signed to the label that launched Belle & Sebastian and Snow Patrol. Playing at the Candy bar as part of the Shibby Shabblers night. Time and price tbc
Bars and clubs Beach We Love 90s. Tunes from way back when. 10.30pm-3am, £2/90p check with venue before travelling. ➧ Please See our venue directory for details
Casablanca Now That’s What I Call The 80s. 10.30pm-3am, free Cosmopolitan Bar Parlour Games. Have a drink and play some games. Bring your own games or choose from the selection at the bar. Free Funky Buddha Lounge Caramel. R’n’B, hip hop and funk. 10.30pm-3.30am £3/£1 Honeyclub Stardust versus Corrosion. Cheese and rock double header. 11pm-4am, £4.50/£1.50 KooKlub No Class. Student night with pop, cheese and old-skool. 10pm-3am, £3 NUS Suga Qube 2-4-1 on cocktails. 5pm-2am, free
Gay Charles Street Club Studio 150. Party tunes with DJs Luke and Ali, plus sexy dancers. 10.30pm–3am, £1.50 Legends Dance Mojo. Classics from across the decades. 11pm-4am, free Marine Tavern Elsie’s Chillout. 12pm-12am Marlborough Student social night with games, pool and tunes. From 6pm R-Bar Miss Jason’s Madhouse. 10pm-late Revenge Boogaloo Stu’s Shinky Shonky. All drinks £2.10.30pm-3am, free
Theatre Futurology: A Global Revue A darkly comic show of dance and cabaret, looking at global issues including climate change and fossil fuels. Brighton Dome Corn Exhange, 8pm, £15-£18 Hamlet Halcyon Productions present Max Day’s Hamlet, looking at the possibility of a man going his whole life without really knowing who he is. Marlborough Theatre, 8pm, £10/£8, tickets on 07786 984900 The Last Confession New thriller about one of the most highly guarded institutions: The Vatican. (Pre-show talk on 3 May) Chichester
Festival Theatre, please call for show times. £10–£32 Lunatics Intense and physical look at Jesus’ death and the formation of the Christian Church. Explicit language/violence – ages 16+ only. Nightingale Theatre, 8pm, £6.50/£8.50 The Merchant Of Venice One of Shakespeare's best-known plays. Book through the Brighton Festival at www.brightonfestivalfringe.org.uk. Brighton Little Theatre, 7.45pm, £7.50/£8.50 Office Suite A double bill from Alan Bennett on the predictability of life in an office, starring Patricia Routledge. Chichester Minerva Theatre, SOLD OUT
Comedy Top Banana Comedy A collection of acts new to the circuit and with new material, hailing from Brighton and London. The Cella @ The Sanctuary, 8pm, £5/£4 Jonathan Kay – The World Famous Fool A jester for the 21st century. No. 20, 8.30pm, £12/£8.50 Maddie Live – Talking Up The Fringe Fringe talk show with some of the stars of the festival joining Maddie in her bath for a chat. Hanbury Club, 7pm, £7/£5 Slaughterhouse Live’s TV Spazzatura Winners of Brighton Fringe ‘Best Comedy Show’ 2005, the Comedy Store's character cabaret returns. Joogleberry Playhouse, 8pm, £6/£5 Pluck – Musical Arson! Comedy string quartet. Antics and melodies. Udderbelly, 3.15pm, £10/£8
Events Hammer And Tongue Spoken word and performance poetry with internationally recognised artists, plus an open slam. Komedia, 8pm (doors 7pm) £5/£4
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A-Z venue directory Brighton and Hove Ali Cats 80 East Street, Brighton 01273 220902 Amsterdam 11 Marine Parade 01273 688825 www.amsterdam.uk.com Aqua 23 Waterfront Brighton Marina 01273 819800 Aquarium 6 Steine Street, Brighton 01273 605525 www.pleisure.com Arc 160 Kings Road Arches 01273 770505 Arthouse Gallery 10 Western Road, Hove 01273 770083 Audio 10 Marine Parade 01273 606906 www.audiobrighton.com Bar Bamboogy 78 West Street, Brighton www.creationbrighton.com Barley Mow 92 St George’s Road 01273 682259 The Beach 171–181 Kings Road Arches, Brighton 01273 722272 Belushi’s 10-12 Grand Junction Road, Brighton 01273 202035 Brighton Centre Kings Road, Brighton 0870 900 9100 www.brightoncentre.co.uk Brighton College Eastern Road www.brightoncollege.net Brighton Dome 29 New Road, Brighton 01273 709709 www.brighton-dome.org.uk Brighton Gloucester 27 Gloucester Place 01273 688011 Brighton and Hove Greyhound Stadium Nevill Road, Hove 01273 204601 www.trap6.com/hove Brighton Museum & Art Gallery Royal Pavilion Gardens, 01273 290900 Brighton Peace & Environment Centre Brighton Ecocentre, 39–41 Surrey Street 01273 766610 Brighton Rocks 6 Rock Place 01273 601139 Brighton Women’s Centre 72 High Street, Brighton 01273 698036 The Brunswick 1 Holland Road, Hove 01273 733984 Bulldog, 31 St James’s Street 01273 696996 www.bulldogbrighton.com Candy Bar 129 St James’s Street 01273 622424 www.thecandybar.co.uk Caroline of Brunswick 39 Ditchling Road, Brighton 01273 624434 Casablanca Middle Street, Brighton 01273 321817 Cella at Sanctuary Café 51–55 Brunswick St East, Hove 01273 770006 Charles Street Bar & Club 8 Marine Parade 01273 624091 www.charlesstreetbar.com Cineworld Brighton Marina Village 01273 818094 www.cineworld.co.uk Clair Hall Perrymount Road, Haywards Heath 01444 455440 Concorde 2 Madeira Drive, Brighton 01273 673311 www.concorde2.co.uk Core Club 12–15 King’s Road, Brighton 01273 326848 Corn Exchange 29 New Road, Brighton 01273 709709 www.brighton-dome.org.uk Cornerstone Community Centre Church Road, Hove 01273 327757 Cosmopolitan Bar 29-31 New Steine 01273 682461 The Cowley Club 12 London Road, Brighton 01273 696104 www.cowleyclub.org.uk Creation 78 West Street, Brighton 01273 321628 www.creationbrighton.com Doctor Brighton’s 16–17 Kings Road 01273 328765 www.pleisure.com Dome 29 New Road, Brighton 01273 709709 www.brighton-dome.org.uk Duke of York’s Picturehouse Preston Circus, Brighton 01273 626261 www.picturehouses.co.uk Education Room Brighton Pavilion 01273 296971 Engine Room 5 Preston Street, Brighton 01273 728999 www.engineroomclub.com Enigma 10 Ship Street, Brighton 01273 328439 www.theenigmabrighton.co.uk
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The Fishbowl 74 East Street 01273 777505 Fitzherberts 25 New Road 01273 682401 Freebutt 1 Phoenix Place 01273 603974 Freemasons 38 Western Road, Hove 01273 732043 Funky Buddha Lounge 169–170 Kings Road Arches, Brighton 01273 725541 Gap Club 61a Western Road, Hove 0844 999 6349 Gardner Arts Centre, University of Sussex campus, Falmer 01273 685861 www.gardnerarts.co.uk The George 5 Trafalgar Street, Brighton 01273 681055 The Globe 78 Middle Street, Brighton 01273 727114 The Greys 105 Southover Street, Brighton 01273 680734 The Hanbury Club 83 St George’s Road, Brighton 01273 605789 Hare & Hounds 75 London Road, Brighton 01273 681163 Harlequin 43 Providence Place, Brighton 01273 620630 www.harlequin-brighton.co.uk Hobgoblin 31 York Place, Brighton 01273 602519 Honeyclub 214 Kings Road Arches, 01273 202807 www.thehoneyclub.co.uk The Hope 10–12 Queen’s Road, Brighton 01273 325793 Hove Museum & Art Gallery 194 Church Road, Hove 01273 290200 Hove Town Hall, Norton Road, Hove 0870 900 9100 www.brighton-hove.gov.uk Jazz Place 10 Ship Street, Brighton 01273 328439 www.thejazzplacebrighton.co.uk Joogleberry Playhouse 14–17 Manchester Street, Brighton 01273 687171 www.joogleberry.com Juggler Bar 21 Western Road, Hove 01273 724195 King and Queen 13 Marlborough Place, Brighton 01273 606207 Komedia Gardner Street, Brighton 01273 647100 www.komedia.co.uk Koo Klub 10 Pool Valley, Brighton 01273 888000 www.kooklub.co.uk
Comprehensive list of venues to complement our listings
Portland Rock Bar 153 Portland Road, Hove 01273 383840 www.portlandrockbar.co.uk Po Na Na Unit 2, 75-79 East Street, Brighton 01273 777904 www.ponana.com Pressure Point 33 Richmond Place, Brighton 01273 702333 www.pressurepoint.me.uk Preston Manor Preston Drove, Brighton 01273 292770 Prestonville Arms 64 Hamilton Road, Brighton 01273 701007 Prince Albert 48 Trafalgar Street, Brighton 01273 730499 The Providence 130 Western Road, Hove 01273 727822 PV 22 Upper North Street, Brighton 01273 325491 www.thepv.co.uk Queen’s Arms 7 George Street, Brighton 01273 696873 R-Bar 7 Marine Parade, Brighton 01273 608133 www.revenge.co.uk Red Roaster Café 1d St James’s Street, Brighton 01273 686668 Rehab Brighton Marina 01273 675007 www.rehabbrighton.com Rendezvous Casino Brighton Marina 01273 605602 www.rendezvouscasino.com Revenge 32 Old Steine, Brighton 01273 606064 www.revenge.co.uk Revue Bar 19 New Steine, Brighton 01273 607456 Riki Tik 18a Bond Street, Brighton 01273 683844 Saqqara 158 North Street, Brighton 01273 779701 Sky Bar 54-55 Meeting House Lane, Brighton www.skybarbrighton.com Star Inn 5–9 Manchester Street, Brighton 01273 601450 Suga Qube 5 Castle Square 01273 770246 Sumo 9–12 Middle Street 01273 749465 Sussex Arts Club 7 Ship Street 01273 778020 Theatre Royal New Road 08700 606650 www.theambassadors.com/theatreroyal
Lo Lounge 106 Kings Road, Brighton 01273 715077
V2 5 Steine Street, Brighton 01273 609672 Vanilla Bar 73a Western Road, Hove 01273 748182 Vavoom 31 Old Steine, Brighton 01273 603010 Volks The Colonnade, 3 Madeira Drive, Brighton 01273 682828 www.volksclub.co.uk
Marlborough Bar & Theatre 4 Princes Street, Brighton 07782 278521 www.marlboroughtheatre.co.uk Marine Tavern 13 Broad Street, Brighton 01273 681284 www.harlequin-brighton.co.uk Mint Meeting House Lane 0871 2072 088 Mojo’s Bar & Restaurant 103 North Road, Brighton 01273 622522
Western Front Near Churchill Square, Brighton 01273 725656 White Horse 30 Camelford St, Brighton 01273 603726 Wild Fruit @ Creation, 78 West Street, Brighton www.wildfruit.co.uk West Hill Hall Compton Avenue, Brighton
New Madeira Hotel 19-23 Marine Parade, Brighton 01273 698331 New Venture Theatre Bedford Place 01273 746118 www.newventure.org.uk
The Zap Kings Road Arches, Brighton 01273 202407 Zoot Street Bar Queens Road, Brighton 01273 737770 The Zone 33 St James’s Street, Brighton 01273 626442
Ocean Rooms 1–2 Morley Street, Brighton 01273 699069 Odeon Cinema West Street, Brighton 0871 224 4007 www.odeon.co.uk Ohso Social 250a Kings Road Arches, Brighton 01273 746067 The Old Market Upper Market Street, Hove 01273 736222 www.theoldmarket.co.uk The Park Crescent Pub 39 Park Crescent Terrace, Brighton 01273 604993 Pavilion Tavern 7–8 Castle Square, Brighton 0844 999 6331 Pavilion Theatre 29 New Road, Brighton 01273 709709 www.brighton-dome.org.uk Penthouse (above the Freebutt), 1 Phoenix Place, Brighton 01273 603 974 Pintxo People 95-99 Western Road, Brighton 01273 732323 www.pintxopeople.co.uk
Around Sussex The Anchor Inn Anchor Lane, Barcombe 01273 400414 www.anchorinnandboating.co.uk Ashdown Forest Broadstone car park, second left from Wychcross Assembly Hall Connaught Theatre Pavilion Theatre, Union Place, Worthing 01903 206206 www.worthingtheatres.co.uk The Black Horse High Street, Findon, Worthing 01903 872301 Bluebell Railway Sheffield Park Station, East Sussex 01825 720800 Café Blue Pevensey Road, Eastbourne 07834 405675 The Capitol North Street, Horsham 01403 750220 Chichester Festival Theatre Oaklands Park 01243 781312 www.cft.org.uk Clair Hall Perrymount Road, Haywards Heath 01444 455440 Congress Theatre Carlisle Road, Eastbourne 01323 412000 www.eastbournetheatres.co.uk Devonshire Park Theatre Compton Street, Eastbourne 01323 412000 www.eastbournetheatres.co.uk Fountain Inn High Street, Handcross 01444 400218 www.fountainpub.co.uk The Half Brick 221 Brighton Road, Worthing 01903 234196 The Hawth Hawth Avenue, Crawley 01293 553636 www.hawth.co.uk Horsham Folk Club The Normandy Centre, Denne Road, Horsham 01306 875653 www.horshamfolkclub.co.uk Jack Horner 80 High Street, Worthing 01903 236427 Malling Community Centre Spences Lane, Lewes 01273 477931 www.mallingcommunitycentre.com Martlets Martlets Hall, Civic Way, Burgess Hill 01444 242888 Royal Hippodrome Theatre 108 Seaside Road, Eastbourne 01323 412000 www.eastbournetheatres.co.uk Royal Oak Station Street, Lewes 01273 478124 St Thomas à Beckett Church Hall Cliffe High Street, Lewes United Reformed Church Clinton Place, corner of Broad Street, Seaford Winter Garden Theatre Compton Street, Eastbourne 01323 412000 www.eastbournetheatres.co.uk Worthing Museum & Art Gallery Chapel Road, Worthing 01903 221140 www.worthingtheatres.co.uk Worthing Connaught Theatre Union Place, Worthing 01903 206206 www.worthingtheatres.co.uk Worthing Pavilion Theatre Marine Parade, Worthing 01903 206206 www.worthingtheatres.co.uk
■ We try to ensure all event details are correct but regret we cannot be held responsible for any inaccuracies. Please check directly with the venue before travelling ■
059_LS319_JobsCV
4/25/07
5:30 PM
Page 1
JOBS
Come and join us! A massive local success story, Latest magazines expands to create a top media sales job The sales department of Latest Homes Ltd is growing, and we are looking for an energetic, enthusiastic salesperson to jump on board and join the team. Working in a fun environment, the right candidate will take a pro-active role, having the drive and energy to be a part of the company.
The work is extremely varied as we produce several magazines: Latest Homes is the biggest property guide to Sussex and Latest 7 covers all recent news, gigs, films and shows. A real team player is essential as the department works closely across the variety of products and with every stage of each magazine from concepts to distribution. With our biggest title being published weekly, there is an addictive and energetic buzz in the office. Wave magazine is our monthly publication, covering wellbeing and ethical living. Latest Art is our most recent venture, with a fifth issue out now, featuring top artists and up-to-date news from the world of art. All our magazines are created in-house from editorial, photography and design to production. The team is strong, and we are proud of the fact that most of them have now been with us for many years. The opening of this senior sales position will allow us to build on our recent successes. The right candidate will continue the close relationships with existing clients while creating new contacts and revenue streams for the future. As well as our core business of property we work with a wide range of established businesses from bars and restaurants, boutiques and jewellers to local builders and electricians. As a part of the best sales team in Sussex, this post involves being on top of the everchanging Brighton scene, taking an active interest in city life and what’s on offer. Read by a huge number of Brighton and Hove residents and many from across the county, Latest Homes is a first point of call for those looking to move within the area and Latest 7 is the essential TV and what’s on guide. Work is varied and can be exciting, making a fun office atmosphere. Our current work for the Brighton Festival, the Festival Fringe and Udderbelly means that the team has close tabs on all festival news. As proud sponsors of the Udderbelly venue, we take an active role in promoting the best of what Brighton has to offer. We are also a key sponsor of community radio station, Radio Reverb. Our offices are central, just minutes from the station, making it ideal for commuters. If you want to be a part of the best sales team in Sussex and the best magazines, and thrive on knowing what’s new in the area, then you could be just who we are looking for. If you feel that you have what it takes and can bring that extra something to the team, then call us now. For more information on the sales job opening, contact Lynne at lynne@thelatest.co.uk or call her on 01273 818150 ext 112 for an informal chat
Sales Executive required for busy advertising dept
Property Recruitment Specialists
Floating Manager
Brighton
Our clients are looking for a highly experienced residential sales manager to cover multiple offices in the East Sussex region. You must be highly efficient and demonstrate strong leadership and motivational skills. Previous experience within the property industry is essential.
Letting Manager
Horsham
You will be responsible for ensuring your team are motivated and hit office goals and targets. Preferably ARLA 1 pass along with up to date knowledge of the legalities involved in letting.
Sales Negotiator
Lewes
If you consider yourself to have excellent communication skills along with a strong desire to succeed in a sales environment then call us for further details.
Sales Negotiator
Brighton
We require a dynamic high achiever that is looking to join a well respected independent firm with prospects. Fantastic opportunity not to be missed!
Covering East & West Sussex, Kent, Surrey & Hampshire.
everyone has a price on their head
to maximize your potential call us now on:
0845 130 1188 fax 0845 130 1189
email enquiries@lca-jobs.com
The top media sales position in Sussex is available as Latest Magazines expands! Latest Homes Ltd cover a variety of titles including property, health and art. Be a part of our creative team and work in a fast-paced environment, managing existing accounts and developing new client contacts.
web www.lca-jobs.com
If you can answer yes to the following, then you could be who we are looking for to join our successful team: • Energetic & enthusiastic approach • Minimum of two years experience • Proven track record in face to face sales • Highly motivated with the ability to work as part of the team and on your own initiative • Organised and able to work to deadlines • Excellent customer service skills Apply by emailing your CV to lynne@thelatest.co.uk or call Lynne Edwards on 01273 818150 ex. 112 for an informal chat Latest Homes Ltd Unit 1, Level 5 North, New England House New England Street, Brighton BN1 4GH 01273 818150 www.thelatest.co.uk
To get your recruitment event or business CV listed email editorial@thelatest.co.uk
latest homes latest jobs 59
060_LS319_Job Ads
4/26/07
6:01 PM
Page 2
JOBS
FULL/PART TIME OFFICE ADMINISTRATOR An established and fast growing development company requires a full and part time (15-20 hours per week) office administrator. Competent computer skills are essential to include: Word, Excel and Power Point along with good communication skills and the ability to work off your own initiative in a warm and friendly environment. Apply in writing with CV to: Goldstone Business Centre 2 Goldstone Street Hove, East Sussex BN3 3RJ info@goldstonebusinesscentre.co.uk
Conveyancing Legal Secretary We are looking for an experienced conveyancing legal secretary to join one of our busy conveyancing teams at our Hove office. You will have at least two years experience in a conveyancing secretarial role and will be able to work under pressure in a busy environment. The role will entail all aspects of conveyancing from typing all correspondence to exchange and completion. We offer a competitive salary, central Hove offices with excellent career development and progression. Please send your CV and covering letter to Tania Woodward, Arscotts Solicitors, 54 Lansdowne Place, Hove, BN3 1FG or email to tania.woodward@arscotts.com
60 latest jobs
Full Time Property Manager Required Established letting agent require a full time administration assistant to work within our busy Hove office. The successful candidate must be very customer service orientated and have good administration skills. A competitive salary is offered and previous experience in the property industry is preferred. To apply please send your CV to: Graham Shipp MNAEA 109 Church Road, Hove, East Sussex, BN3 2AF graham@propertymoves.co.uk 01273 321333
hundreds of jobs every week...
061_LS319_Job Ads
4/25/07
3:58 PM
Page 1
JOBS
Top Media Jobs Senior Project Manager – Kerb Our Project Managers are at the heart of what Kerb produces, so we’re looking for a general all rounder who is creatively minded, client facing, commercially savvy, technically competent and financially numerate.
Strategic Planner (digital) – Kerb The Strategic Planner interacts with the account, creative and technical teams as well as senior clients, providing the insight needed to inform effective digital marketing strategies.
Web Manager – William Reed Publishing We are looking for a Web Manager to oversee all aspects of the retail and manufacturing websites, including the marketing, content management and development, functional development, traffic analysis, revenue opportunities and management of any subsidiary digital communications.
Freelance Audio / Visual Engineer – Public-i Public-i Group Ltd are the leading providers of webcasting and other multi-media solutions to the public sector. Public-i are currently expanding with both UK and European clients and are looking to recruit a Freelance AV Engineer.
Instructional Designers – Epic Epic is looking to strengthen its design team. Working in a fast paced environment you’ll be required to take ownership, control and responsibility for the design of the learning and solutions, ensuring it meets the needs of the client.
Project Editor – Ilex Press We’re looking for a dynamic Project Editor to join our team in Lewes and help us expand our list into new areas. The ideal candidate will have proven editorial skills and experience, a meticulous eye for detail and an active interest in the subject matter of our titles.
Database Application Developer – Click Databases Ltd Click Databases is recruiting for an experienced, enthusiastic and highly self motivated database application developer to join its small team of remote developers. the successful candidate will be involved in a broad range of development projects.
Production Manager – Facilitate Ltd We are looking for an experienced production manager to manage a team of three production editors and a production coordinator, and oversee the throughput of materials in print and other media. The ideal candidate is someone who already works in a similar environment with team management responsibilities.
PA SECRETARY Are you self-motivated with a proactive approach that thrives on new challenges, loves being kept busy and relishes any opportunity to use your initiative? An opportunity has arisen for a PA for the two directors of City Property Developments based in Hove.This is an excellent position for someone who has some property background and looking to work in an exciting, diverse and challenging role. This role requires excellent organisational and computer skills, an ability to work on your own initiative and can be offered with flexible working hours to suit your needs if required. If you think you are the person we are looking for to support the ongoing success of our property development business then please apply with your CV and a covering letter to: City Property Developments, FAO Steven Sparks, Studio 157, Sackville Road, Hove, East Sussex, BN3 3HD or email steven@citydevelopments.net If you would like any further information then please do not hesitate to call us on 01273 744100.
...to advertise call our sales team on 01273 818150
News Lucozade Sport increase digital activity to support new product launch Lucozade Sport have tasked digital agency Worth with driving online sales of their new product, Lucozade Sport Creatine and Carbohydrate tablets.The new product, designed for people who lead active lifestyles with the goal of improving their power and performance in multiple sprint events, is on sale on the Lucozade Sport Science Academy Site at www.lucozadesportshop.com.
Estate agency marketers start own agency Brighton-based marketing consultants who specialise in advising estate agents on their marketing are putting their money where their mouths are by launching their own estate agency. Husband and wife team Kate and Charlie Snell have launched Brighton & Hove Family Homes, which specialises in the very specific needs of families buying and selling in the city.
Academy Internet acquires Viv Cole Associates e-Learning business Following record Q1 sales figures, Academy Internet is on track in its aim to become one of the top 25 digital media businesses in the UK by 2010. The company is constantly looking for opportunities to expand in its chosen areas of internet marketing and e-learning and the new acquisition represents a step closer to achieving their business strategy.
latest jobs 61
062_LS319_TVIntro
27/4/07
9:33 AM
Page 2
latestTV Dani on TV
She says it how she sees it
How the Other Half Learns Wednesday 9 May, Five Three teenagers from an inner city comprehensive secondary school in Wembley are sent for two weeks to Wells boarding school – the oldest boarding school in England. The two boys and one girl from Wembley meet their new exchange students and get to grips with their new surroundings and home. The three teenagers take to the school in different ways in the first episode. In this episode we see the last seven days of life for the trio in the posh cathedral school. Michelle, the girl from Wembley has really high standards and it shows in her work, but moving to a school where she is pulled away from her studies to take part in extra curricular activities is taking its toll. So during her spare time, while all the other girls are chatting away, she takes herself up to her room to cram in a little extra study time. Moeed, one of the boys from Wembley is asked by day boy Tom if he would like to come and stay at his house. Moeed, like most people would be, is totally shocked at the size of Tom’s home. Mustafa, the last of the Wembley group is missing his family, but has also fitted into boarding well. The school arranges a night out to Bristol and all the students bond while in an arcade, and Michelle sees how important it is to put the homework aside sometimes and have some fun. The great thing about this is that all the kids get on really well. When I first heard what this was about I was expecting there to be arguments and bitchiness, but there is nothing of the sort. Mustafa is asked to play on the school’s hockey team during an away match, Michelle is getting a clarinet lesson and Moeed is being given a bit of a talking to by the head mistress for slacking off in lessons. When the three from Wembley went to Wells they were expecting everyone to look at them and think they were criminals, and when the three from Wells go to Wembley they are expecting the kids there to think they are posh (in a bad way). However it appears that all the kids find, from their new locations, slightly more understanding about how others live and about how they can improve themselves. That and a slight case of culture shock as the school in Wembley is a quarter of the size of Wells, but has triple the amount of students. At the end of the second week Moeed gives a presentation to a hall full of people and it goes down really well. Next time we see how the three students from Wells get on living with the Wembley kids in their houses and going to a regular school. This is heart-warming stuff, banishing the idea many of us have that people in general don’t get on with others from different cultural backgrounds.
Films on TV
Movies on the box this week
TUESDAY 1
SATURDAY 5
Dead Poets Society ★★★★✩ (1989, BBC1, 11.30pm. Dir Peter Weir) Robin Williams’ first foray into drama is the tale of an inspirational teacher at a stuffy all-boys school, and was released before the other copycat flicks came out (and before Robin got over-sentimental). His students include a very young Ethan Hawke and Robert Sean Leonard. Bless. Victoria Nangle
Road to Perdition ★★★✩✩
WEDNESDAY 2 Clue ★★★★✩ (1985, ITV3, 9.35pm. Dir Jonathan Lynn) Remember Cluedo? Stateside they call it Clue, and this is the farcical story of who killed Mr Body, where, and with what. Star turns come from Tim Curry, Christopher Lloyd and Michael McKean, making for a high camp oddball whodunnit. VN
THURSDAY 3 The Score ★★★✩✩
(2002, Channel 4, 9.05pm. Dir Sam Mendes) Tom Hanks tried to explode his good guy persona as a hit man on the revenge trail with his son in tow, in this hard-nosed thriller adapted from an equally gritty graphic novel. It tries to play up its noir credentials, but is too gloom laden to suck you into its spell. MC
Saturday Night and Sunday Morning ★★★★✩ (1960, Sky Movie Classics, 2.40am. Dir Karel Reisz) The last word in post-war kitchen sink gloom. Albert Finney still bristles with anger almost fifty years on, against the system that grinds him down, his dead-end job and ultimately himself. A brutal reminder of the stifling atmosphere of the 50s, it’s a master class in quality British cinema. MC
SUNDAY 6 Invasion of the Body Snatchers ★★★★✩
(2001, Channel 4, 10.30pm. Dir Frank Oz) It’s the ‘one last heist’ movie revisited – with a smorgasbord of quality actors breathing magic into the formula. Robert De Niro wants to run a jazz club after his last job, but Marlon Brando has an offer he can’t refuse. VN
(1978, BBC1, 11.40pm. Dir Philip Kaufman) Just because Donald Sutherland is feeling paranoid, doesn’t mean the aliens aren’t out to get him in an inventive remake of the original sci-fi flick. Along with clever riffs on modern anxiety, moving the action to hippydippy San Francisco makes perfect sense – as does Leonard Nimoy as an extraterrestrial with designs on earth. MC
FRIDAY 4
MONDAY 7
¡Three Amigos! ★★★✩✩ (1986, BBC1, 11.35pm Dir John Landis) Chevy Chase, Martin Short and Steve Martin star as Western idols out of their depth when a Mexican village summons them to fight some real-life bad guys. Knockabout comedy par excellence, but the stars are probably having more fun than their audience. Matt Chittock
Erin Brockovich ★★★✩✩ (2000, UKTV Gold, 9pm. Dir Steven Soderburgh) Julia Roberts sticks it to the man, with a smile and a Wonderbra in Steven Soderburgh’s riveting real-life drama about a lowly legal secretary fighting a case of corporate negligence. It’s an impressive reminder that Julia really can act when given the right script. MC
All About My Mother ★★★★✩
Erin Brockovich, Monday 7, UKTV Gold, 9pm
(1999, Sky Movies Indie, 12.35am. Dir Pedro Almodóvar) Bizarre and beguiling, Alvadóvar was on the money with his spruce story of a mourning mother out to reconnect with the father of her child. All of the director’s favourite obsessions are on the screen, and there’s never been a better showcase for his unique mix of comedy, melodrama and camp. MC
62 latest 7
1 – 7 May
8M ITV
063_LS319_TVTue
4/26/07
11:33 AM
Page 1
tuesday 1 may Horizon BBC2, 9pm On 26 November 2007 the most complex scientific experiment ever built will attempt a re-run of The Big Bang. The beginning of everything as we know it. They’re doing it in tunnels under the France/Swiss border. It may revolutionise everything, but couldn’t it just blow up an awful lot of things at once too? Hmm.
Animal Addicts Channel 4, 10pm Britain and our pets, eh? We love ‘em and can’t get enough of ‘em. We’ll fight for their wellbeing and happily take in 70 owls to live in our terraced house with us. Not all of us? Oh well, must just be the one man – and the lady with over 300 pets on her farm, and a woman with over 100 dogs. Paris Hilton eat your heart out.
The Panic Room BBC3, 9pm Rather like a real-life Room 101, this takes two people with really strong fears – phobias in fact – and tries to cure them in three days by combining one-to-one therapy with visits to The Panic Room, where their worst fears come to life. Yes, worst fears come to life. Today that would be an elevator and a spider. Yikes!
terrestrial
sport
BBC1
BBC2
ITV1
Channel 4
Five
Sky Sports 1
6.00am Breakfast 9.15 Found 10.00 Homes Under The Hammer 11.00 To Buy Or Not To Buy 11.30 Car Booty 12.15pm Bargain Hunt 1.00 BBC News; Weather 1.30 Regional News And Weather 1.40 Neighbours 2.05 Doctors 2.35 Diagnosis Murder 3.20 BBC News; Weather; Regional News 3.25 Lazytown 3.50 Watch My Chops 4.00 The Basil Brush Show 4.30 Extreme Animals 5.00 Blue Peter 5.25 Newsround 5.35 Neighbours
6.00am – 10.15 CBeebies 10.30 Primary History: Britain Since 1948 10.50 Landmarks: Pakistan And Its People 11.10 Churchill’s Bodyguard 12.00pm The Daily Politics 12.30 Working Lunch 1.00 Pod’s Mission (x2) 1.30 World Championship Snooker 5.55 Party Election Broadcast By The Labour Party
6.00am GMTV 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 10.30 This Morning 12.30pm Loose Women 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News; Weather 2.00 Midsomer Murders 3.00 Half Ton Hospital With Jeremy Kyle 4.00 Daily Cooks 5.00 The Royal
6.10am The Hoobs (x2) 7.00 Freshly Squeezed 7.25 Everybody Loves Raymond 7.55 Just Shoot Me (x2) 8.55 Frasier (x2) 9.50 Will And Grace 10.20 Without A Trace (x2) 12.00pm News At Noon 12.30 Small Railway Journeys 12.45 Life Begins Again 1.45 FILM: San Demetrio, London (1947) 3.30 Countdown 4.15 Deal Or No Deal 5.00 The New Paul O’Grady Show
6.00 BBC News And Weather 6.30 South East Today; Weather 7.00 Castaway A new member joins the community. A man-eating tiger? 7.30 EastEnders Chelsea struggles to understand Denise. Of course she can’t understand – it’s her mother! 8.00 Holby City Connie’s decision to operate despite being in the advanced stages of pregnancy has unforeseen consequences. Unforeseen if you’re not a ‘quirky’ scriptwriter. 9.00 Crimewatch Nick Ross and Fiona Bruce appeal for help in solving crimes. Don’t have nightmares. BOO! Now you can have nightmares. 10.00 BBC News; Regional News; Weather 10.35 Crimewatch Update No, really, no bad dreams. Only fluffy clouds and bunny rabbits – that don’t steal things from you and mug you. Really, no nightmares. 10.45 ONE Life Director Richard Macer meets several people who claim to be the reincarnated spirit of a celebrity, including Elvis Presley and Marilyn Monroe. They’re all shook up. 11.30 FILM: Dead Poets Society (1989) Starring Robin Williams. Revolutionary English teacher shakes up the establishment. 1.40am Sign Zone: See Hear 2.10 Panorama 2.40 Timewatch 3.30 Return To Lullingstone Castle 4.00 To Buy Or Not To Buy
6.00 Eggheads Finished work? Don’t switch your brain off! Try a general knowledge quiz. Right now. 6.30 Great British Menu Fourteen of the nation’s top chefs compete to convince the French that we can match them in gastronomic prowess. Yeah, ‘cause cooking’s all about genetics and nothing to do with talent. Right. 7.00 World Championship Snooker Hazel Irvine introduces live coverage from the quarter-finals. See if you can lip read what the players say when they miss a shot. Go on. 9.00 Horizon See highlights. 9.50 This World: The Fight For Cuba’s Music When the world fell in love with Cuban music after Buena Vista Social Club, the Cubans set about re-releasing their old songs. Big American company Peer Music took them to court claiming that Peer owned the songs. Travel from London to Havana, where the old musicians sit and wait for their share of the royalties. An English Judge will decide who owns the rights to Cuba’s music, the Cubans or the Americans. 10.30 Newsnight 11.20 World Championship Snooker Click, roll, pot. 12.10am World Championship Snooker Extra 2.00 GCSE Bitesize Revision: French 1 4.00 GCSE Bitesize Revision French 2
6.00 Meridian Tonight 6.25 Party Election Broadcast By The Labour Party 6.30 ITV Evening News; Weather 7.00 Emmerdale Bob messes up when Kelly appears on Dawn’s headstone. What-a-mistakea-tomake. 7.30 UEFA Champions League Semi-Final: Liverpool V Chelsea Steve Rider introduces live coverage from Anfield of the UEFA Champions League semi-final, second leg between Liverpool and Chelsea. It’s a repeat of the semi-final two years ago in which Liverpool went through to the final courtesy of a hotly disputed winner from Luis Garcia. A place in the final in Athens on 23 May awaits the winners. Commentary comes from Clive Tyldesley and David Pleat with pitchside reports from Gabriel Clarke and Robbie Earle. 10.00 Traffic Wardens Confessions They are Britain’s public enemy number one, risking daily attack by angry motorists - so why do they do it? Answers on a postcard. 10.30 ITV News; Weather 11.00 Real Crime: A Deadly Secret Munchausen’s Syndrome. Really real. 12.05am ITV Play: Glitterball 4.00 Together Forever 5.00 ITV Nightscreen 5.30 ITV Early Morning News
6.00 The Simpsons 6.30 Hollyoaks Zak begins to suspect Will is up to no good, but his plan to prove this goes horribly wrong. Don’t mess with the Willmeister. 7.00 Channel 4 News 7.55 3 Minute Wonder: Watch This Space 8.00 How To Look Good Naked Series in which women who are unsatisfied with their body shape are offered styling, health and beauty advice to help them achieve the body perfect - without cosmetic surgery. Photoshop works a treat, apparently. 9.00 Jamestown: America’s Birthplace: A Time Team Special The team make a 400th-anniversary visit to Jamestown, Virginia, the first permanent English settlement in America. Before The World. 10.00 Animal Addicts See highlights. 11.05 Get Your Act Together With Harvey Goldsmith 12.10am PartyPoker.com Poker Nations Cup 1.10 Lloyds TSB Insurance British F3 International Series 1.40 KOTV Classics 2.35 Velux 5 3.00 KOTV 3.30 Gumball 3000 (x2) 4.25 Adrenalin Rush 4.50 Water Stories 4.55 Monster Garage
6.10am Fifi & The Flowertots 6.25 Franny’s Feet 6.40 Bird Bath 6.45 Funky Town 6.50 Milkshake! 7.20 Miss Spider’s Sunny Patch Friends 7.30 Little Princess 7.45 Make Way For Noddy 8.00 Say It With Noddy 8.05 Fifi & The Flowertots 8.20 Peppa Pig 8.25 Thomas & Friends 8.40 Old Bear Stories 8.50 Mio Mao 9.00 Wright Stuff 10.30 Trisha 11.30 News 12.00pm Home & Away 12.30 Britain’s Worst... 1.30 Russell Grant’s Postcards 1.35 FILM: A Mother’s Gift (1995) 3.40 FILM: Sacrifices Of The Heart (2007) 5.30 News 6.00 Home And Away Jack, Sam and Rory take the next step towards becoming a family. Having a fight? 6.30 Two And A Half Men 7.00 Five News 7.15 Big Ideas That Changed The World David Blunkett MP, and former home secretary, examines the history of nationalism and its impact on British national identity today. 8.00 Angels & Demons: The True Story Film examining author Dan Brown’s novel ‘Angels and Demons’– a story of high intrigue, and the threat posed to the Catholic Church by a secret society known as the Illuminati. But is any of it based on real events? Enter this documentary. 9.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation Grissom returns from his sabbatical and wonders what’s been going on in his absence. 10.00 CSI: Miami Miami’s Latin Festival shifts from Samba to sombre when a crowded dance floor becomes the scene of a double shooting with gang links. Scary. 11.00 Law And Order: Special Victims Unit A college co-ed is found dazed and raped, but is reluctant to press charges. 12.00am Arrest And Trial 12.30 Arrest And Trial 12.55 NBA Basketball 4.20 FIM Motocross World Cup 5.10 Now Is The Time: Night Of Combat - Kick Boxing
6.00am Soccer AM: The Best Bits 7.00 WWE Afterburn 8.00 Football: UEFA Champions League 9.00 Ford Monday Night Football 10.30 Aerobics: Oz Style 11.00 Soccer AM: The Best Bits 12.00pm Football: UEFA Champions League 1.00 LIVE Sailing: America’s Cup 3.30 Wild Spirits 4.00 Ford Monday Night Football 5.30 Football: UEFA Champions League 6.30 Revista De La Liga 7.30 LIVE Greyhound Racing 10.00 You’re On Sky Sports 11.00 Revista De La Liga 12.00am How The 2007 Cricket World Cup Was Won 3.00 You’re On Sky Sports
Sky Sports 2 6.00am Aerobics: Oz Style 6.30 On The Edge 7.00 Aerobics: Oz Style 7.30 On The Edge 8.00 Volleyball 9.00 On The Edge 9.30 World Motor Sport 12.00pm On The Edge 12.30 FEI Equestrian World 1.00 Speedway: Elite League 3.00 Soccer AM: The Best Bits 4.00 On The Edge 4.30 FEI Equestrian World 5.00 Sports Unlimited 6.00 How The 2007 Cricket World Cup Was Won 9.00 Sailing: America’s Cup 10.00 Poker: Sports Stars Challenge 12.00am Sailing: America’s Cup 1.00 Sports Unlimited
Sky Sports 3 8.00am Speedway: Elite League 10.00 Pool 11.00 FEI Equestrian World 11.30 Racing News 12.00pm Volleyball 1.00 Pool 2.00 On The Edge 2.30 FEI Equestrian World 3.00 WWE The Bottom Line 4.00 WWE Afterburn 5.00 WWE Smackdown 7.00 WWE Experience 8.00 WWE Heat 9.00 WWE Backlash 12.00am Squash 2.00 Volleyball
Victoria Nangle
extraterrestrial Sky One
BBC3
BBC4
ITV2
ITV3
E4
More4
Living
9.00am Project Catwalk 10.00 Stargate SG-1 (x2) 12.00pm Angel 1.00 Best Of Bones 2.00 Cold Case 3.00 Las Vegas 4.00 Stargate SG-1 (x2) 6.00 Stargate Atlantis 7.00 The Simpsons (x4) 9.00 Battlestar Galactica (x2) 11.00 Law And Order 12.00am Las Vegas 1.00 Stargate Atlantis
7.00pm Spendaholics Saved My Life 8.00 The Bulls*** Detective 9.00 The Panic Room. See highlights. 10.00 EastEnders 10.30 Ideal 11.00 Family Guy (x2) 11.45 Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps (x2) 12.45am The Panic Room 1.40 Ideal 2.10 Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps (x2)
7.00pm Casualty 1906 8.00 The World 8.30 Marcus Brigstocke’s Trophy People 9.00 The Diary Of A Nobody 9.30 The League Of Gentlemen 10.00 Operation Good Guys 10.30 Storyville: Cuba! Africa! Revolution! 11.30 The Diary Of A Nobody 12.00am The Real Mr Pooter
11.10am Judge Judy 12.00pm Coronation Street 12.30 Emmerdale 1.00 The Jeremy Kyle Show (x2) 3.00 The Ricki Lake Show 3.50 Sally Jessy Raphael 4.35 Airline USA (x2) 5.35 Judge Judy 6.00 American Idol (x2) 9.00 FILM: The Hand That Rocks The Cradle (1992) 11.10 FILM: Coyote Ugly (2000)
12.55pm Mapp And Lucia 2.00 Never The Twain 2.30 Tales Of The Unexpected 3.00 Cagney And Lacey 4.00 Pie In The Sky 5.05 Quantum Leap 6.05 Rising Damp 6.40 Movies Now 6.50 Lovejoy 8.00 The Bill: Role Model 9.00 City Lights 10.00 Inspector Wexford: Means Of Evil 12.05am Lovejoy
2.05pm Switched 2.35 Ed 3.25 The OC 4.30 Hollyoaks 5.00 Friends (x2) 5.55 Scrubs (x2) 7.00 Hollyoaks 7.30 The War At Home 8.00 Friends (x2) 9.00 What About Brian 10.00 Sex In Court 10.30 Derren Brown: Trick Or Treat 11.00 Peep Show 11.35 Scrubs 12.05am Get Your Act Together: The Showdown
1.05pm Deal Or No Deal 2.00 ER (x2) 4.00 FILM: The Fighting Kentuckian (1949) 5.55 3 Minute Wonder: Mouthing Off (x2) 6.05 Deal Or No Deal 7.00 Grand Designs 8.00 More4 News 8.30 The Daily Show 9.00 Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares 10.00 FILM: Ghost World (2001) 12.10am NYPD Blue
12.00pm Maury 12.55 The Fix 1.00 Will And Grace 1.30 Will And Grace 2.00 Bewitched (x2) 3.00 Close To Home 4.00 Charmed (x2) 6.00 America’s Next Top Model 7.00 The X Files 8.00 Exposed 9.00 Sensing Murder 10.30 Most Haunted 11.30 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 12.30am Most Haunted Extra
UK TV Gold
Paramount
Discovery
Sci Fi
Sky Movies
Sky Movies
Film4
TCM
2.10pm Some Mothers Do ‘Ave ‘Em 2.50 The Good Life 3.30 Only Fools And Horses 5.00 Dallas (x2) 7.00 Some Mothers Do ‘Ave ‘Em 7.40 The Thin Blue Line 8.20 The Vicar Of Dibley 9.00 Jonathan Creek 10.10 New Tricks 11.20 The Royle Family (x2) 12.40am Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps
3.00pm Two And A Half Men (x2) 4.00 King Of Queens (x2) 5.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (x2) 6.00 Less Than Perfect (x2) 7.00 Scrubs (x2) 8.00 That 70s Show (x2) 9.00 King Of Queens (x2) 10.00 Sex And The City 10.35 South Park (x2) 11.35 The World Stands Up 12.05am Tommy Tiernan Live
12.00pm Mythbusters 1.00 Deadliest Catch 2.00 The FBI Files 3.00 Forensic Detectives 4.00 Time Team 5.00 How It’s Made (x2) 6.00 American Chopper 7.00 Mythbusters 8.00 Born Survivor: Bear Grylls 9.00 Deadliest Catch Special 11.00 Aircraft Carrier: City At Sea 12.00am The FBI Files 1.00 Guilty Or Innocent?
7.00am La Femme Nikita 8.00 Teleshopping 11.00 Andromeda 12.00pm Farscape 1.00 Star Trek 2.00 The Lost World 3.00 FILM: Thank Heaven (2001) 4.35 Psychic Detectives 5.00 Tru Calling 6.00 The Lost World 7.00 Roswell 8.00 Tru Calling 9.00 Heroes (x3) 12.10am Medium 1.10 Heroes (x3)
10.55am The Great McGinty (1940) 12.35pm 12 Angry Men (1957) 2.35 Charlie: The Life And Art Of Charles Chaplin 4.50 The Devil And Daniel Webster (1941) 6.45 Classics Close Up 7.15 12 Angry Men (1957) 9.00 Barbarella (1967) 10.45 Cape Fear (1962) 12.40am Barbarella (1967)
12.00pm The Chorus (2004) 2.00 The Holy Girl (2004) 4.00 AFI George Lucas Tribute 5.45 Indie Close-Up 6.15 The Dream Is Alive 7.05 The Chorus (2004) 9.00 Pecker (1998) 10.30 Mean Creek (2004) 12.05am The Libertine (2004) 2.10 AFI George Lucas Tribute 4.00 Close
1.00pm The Dark Corner (1946) 2.55 Cleopatra (1963) 7.15 When Eight Bells Toll (1971) 9.00 The Gift (2000) Keanu Reeves scares gifted lady Cate Blanchett as a murder hits a small Southern town. 11.10 The Rules Of Attraction (2002) 1.15am The Great Silence (1969)
7.00am Hell Drivers (1958) 8.55 The Opposite Sex (1956) 11.00 The Harvey Girls (1946) 12.50pm The Charge Of The Light Brigade (1936) 3.00 Elvis On Tour (1972) 4.45 White Heat (1949) 7.00 The Running Man (1963) 9.00 Sweet Bird Of Youth (1962) 11.10 Grand Prix (1966) 2.15am Teleshopping
Classics
Indie
064_LS319_TV_Wed
4/26/07
4:28 PM
Page 1
wednesday 2 The Apprentice BBC1, 9pm Who says Sir Alan Sugar hasn’t got a sense of humour? Any doubters had better not miss this as the bossman sets his ten remaining apprentices the task of selling British food to the French. Watch them try and flog the most finely sourced Kent produce to the inhabitants of a Northern Gallic town. Mission improbable.
World Of Compulsive Hoarders Channel 4, 11.05pm If you thought your garage/attic/ beneath your bed was crammed you ain’t seen nothin’, Buster. This is about a dibilitating condition that’s resulted in one sufferer receiving an ASBO, one becoming a US celebrity and one receiving a family intervention. Time for a clear out.
Miss Match E4, 10pm She’s a divorce lawyer by day and a matchmaker by night. Is it a new kind of superhero? No, it’s Alicia Silverstone and an obsessive compulsive disorder. Sort of. This week Kate tries to stay out of her clients private lives for one week and finds it’s harder than she thought. Repeat: I must not be a sticky beak...
terrestrial
sport
BBC1
BBC2
ITV1
Channel 4
Five
Sky Sports 1
6.00am Breakfast 9.15 Found 10.00 Homes Under The Hammer 11.00 To Buy Or Not To Buy 11.30 Car Booty 12.15pm Bargain Hunt 1.00 BBC News; Weather 1.30 Regional News And Weather 1.40 Neighbours 2.05 Doctors 2.35 Diagnosis Murder 3.20 BBC News; Weather; Regional News 3.25 Lazytown 3.50 The Cramp Twins 4.00 Prank Patrol 4.30 Extreme Animals 5.00 Blue Peter 5.25 Newsround 5.35 Neighbours
6.00am Fimbles 6.20 The Story Makers 6.35 Balamory 7.00 Arthur 7.15 ChuckleVision 7.30 Get 100 8.00 The Story Of Tracy Beaker 8.15 Krypto The Superdog 8.30 Jackanory Junior 8.40 Numberjacks 9.00 Nina And The Neurons 9.15 Brum 9.25 Me Too! 9.45 Something Special 10.00 Postman Pat 10.15 The Roly Mo Show 10.30 In Search Of Myths And Heroes 11.30 The Daily Politics 1.00pm Garden Invaders 1.30 Working Lunch 2.00 World Championship Snooker
6.00am GMTV 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 10.30 This Morning 12.30pm Loose Women 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News; Weather 2.00 Midsomer Murders 3.00 Half Ton Hospital With Jeremy Kyle 4.00 Daily Cooks 5.00 The Royal
6.10am The Hoobs (x2) 7.00 Freshly Squeezed 7.25 Everybody Loves Raymond 7.55 Just Shoot Me (x2) 8.55 Frasier (x2) 9.55 Will And Grace 10.20 Without A Trace 11.10 Without A Trace 12.00pm News At Noon 12.30 Checking Into History 12.50 Life Begins Again 1.50 FILM: Blowing Wild (1953) 3.30 Countdown 4.15 Deal Or No Deal 5.00 The New Paul O’Grady Show
6.00 BBC News And Weather 6.30 South East Today; Weather 7.00 Demolition Plymouth’s answer to the Berlin wall comes tumbling down after dividing a community for 50 years. Will David Hasselhoof sing? 7.30 The Green Green Grass Boycie’s decision to motivate his lazy workforce has unforeseen repercussions. They get cross? 8.00 Watchdog Very naughty. Bad, bad consumer product producers. You shall be named and shamed. 8.30 Car Wars Documentary series following Manchester’s specialist car crime squad. No, not like Thomas the Tank Engine with wah-wahs. 9.00 The Apprentice See highlights. 10.00 BBC News; Regional News; Weather 10.35 The National Lottery Draws Scott Mills presents the mid-week draws live from Lottery HQ, including the Thunderball, Dream number and Lotto draws. 10.45 My Small Breasts And I Documentary about three women whose lives are dominated by having small breasts. 11.45 FILM: Coma (1978) Starring Genevieve Bujold, Michael Douglas, Richard Widmark, Rip Torn. Taut medical thriller. 1.40am Sign Zone: The Gardener’s Year 2.10 Mission Africa 2.40 To Buy Or Not To Buy 3.25 Joins BBC News 24
6.00 Eggheads Not like Weebles these eggs – they can both wobble adn fall down. 6.30 Great British Menu Stuart serves up roast suckling pig and Atul spices things up with lamb rack and pan-fried lamb patties. Want some. 7.00 World Championship Snooker Hazel Irvine introduces live coverage from the concluding sessions of this year’s quarter-finals. Have you got any nails left after watching this far? 9.00 Natural World Nature documentary featuring the wildlife of Hawaii’s famous surf zone and the surfers and scientists who are fighting to protect it. More to this island than Magnum. 9.50 Shearwater Island How thousands of strange nocturnal birds make their home on the tiny island of Bardsey in North Wales. 10.00 The Apprentice: You’re Fired Adrian Chiles grills the newly fired candidate from the Apprentice. And then he sautés them. 10.30 Newsnight 11.20 World Championship Snooker Highlights from today’s games. Balls go into pockets. Balls miss pockets. Everyone goes “ooh!” 12.10am World Championship Snooker Extra 2.00 BBC Learning Zone: Schools: GCSE Bitesize Revision: German 4.00 GCSE Bitesize Revision
6.00 Meridian Tonight 6.30 ITV Evening News; Weather 7.00 Emmerdale A fraught Bob does a runner. Never a wise plan. 7.30 Coronation Street Blanche realises that she has finally pushed Ken too far. Did she not do that 20 years ago? 8.00 The Bill A young woman has been found drowned in a swimming pool, and the chief suspect is the son of a high court judge. It’s been a while since the term ‘political hot potato’ was mentioned but this situation definitely earn’s it. 9.00 City Lights Howie’s suspicions are raised when he discovers a box of hotel matches in Pauline’s handbag. Oh, what a twisty turny tale those matches start to unfold. 10.00 Get A Grip Ben Elton and Alexa Chung investigate the phenomenon of shrinking celebrities. Are they getting smaller, or are chocolate bars getting bigger? And just how small is Keira Knightley compared to Marilyn Monroe? 10.30 ITV News; Weather 11.00 Weddings From Hell What happens when the big day goes horribly wrong, featuring home-video footage and personal testimonies. Ideal for bitter singletons. 12.00am ITV Play: Glitterball 4.05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 5.00 ITV Nightscreen 5.30 ITV Early Morning News
6.00 The Simpsons 6.30 Hollyoaks Kris finds Gilly with Will’s laptop and smells a rat, allowing Zak to discover the full extent of Will’s behaviour, while Zoe makes another horrifying discovery. Comeuppance, thy name is Will. 7.00 Channel 4 News 7.55 3 Minute Wonder: Watch This Space 8.00 Property Ladder Sarah Beeny revisits Mark and Tammie, whose previous project was the demanding conversion of an old bakehouse. 9.00 Grand Designs The Nevilles are building a spectacular oak frame and straw bale house in the Cambridgeshire Fens. 10.00 Desperate Housewives Gabrielle and Victor face a crisis when a photo of them sharing a passionate moment is used to blackmail them. Edie gets into a fight with one of the ladies. 11.05 World Of Compulsive Hoarders See highlights. 12.10am Peep Show 12.40 Balls Of Steel 1.25 The War At Home 1.50 The Osbournes Reality show 2.40 Your Face Or Mine? 3.10 Off Centre (x2) 3.55 The Bernie Mac Show 4.20 Reasons To Be Cheerful 4.30 3 Minute Wonder 4.35 Wild Things 5.20 Countdown
6.10am Fifi & The Flowertots 6.25 Franny’s Feet 6.40 Bird Bath 6.45 Funky Town 6.50 The Milkshake! Show 7.20 Miss Spider’s Sunny Patch Friends 7.30 Little Princess 7.45 Make Way For Noddy 8.00 Say It With Noddy 8.05 Fifi & The Flowertots 8.20 Peppa Pig 8.25 Thomas & Friends 8.40 Old Bear Stories 8.50 Mio Mao 9.00 The Wright Stuff 10.30 Trisha 11.30 News 12.00pm Home & Away 12.30 Britains Worst... 1.30 Russell Grant’s Postcards 1.35 FILM: LA Law (2002) 3.25 News 3.30 FILM: Columbo (1992) 5.30 News 6.00 Home And Away Ethan and Kelli concoct an evil plan to blackmail Amanda. Hoo, hoo, ha, ha, evil laughter. 6.30 Two And A Half Men 7.00 Five News 7.15 Lemur Island The gang is forced to flee a forest fire and Derek goes missing. Yes, there is a Lemur called Derek. 8.00 How The Other Half Learns Documentary series in which six GCSE pupils from two vastly different schools embark on a student exchange. Wife Swap with qualifications. 9.00 FILM: The Sweetest Thing (2002) Starring Cameron Diaz, Christina Applegate, Selma Blair and Jason Bateman. Girly gross out road trip comedy. Tackling sex and the single girl in a less than intellectual but rather entertaining fashion. 10.40 FILM: Say It Isn’t So (2001) Starring Chris Klein, Heather Graham and Orlando Jones. Offbeat romantic comedy about an orphan who, while searching for his parents, accidentally falls in love with his sister - who happens to be the worst hairdresser in town. 12.30am PartyPoker.com European Open III 2.00 Major League Baseball Major League Baseball from the USA with Jonny Gould and Josh Chetwynd. 4.45 NHRA Drag Racing
6.00am You’re On Sky Sports 7.00 Sailing: America’s Cup 8.00 Football: UEFA Champions League 9.00 Revista De La Liga 10.00 Sailing: America’s Cup 11.00 Revista De La Liga 12.00pm Football: UEFA Champions League 1.00 LIVE Sailing: America’s Cup 3.30 British Formula Ford Championship 4.00 Revista De La Liga 5.00 Football: UEFA Champions League 6.00 European Tour 6.30 Big Fight Countdown 7.00 LIVE Football: UEFA Champions League 10.30 You’re On Sky Sports 11.30 Big Fight Countdown 12.00am Trans World Sport 1.00 Total Rugby 1.30 European Tour Weekly 2.00 Poker: Sports Stars Challenge 4.00 Big Fight Countdown 4.30 You’re On Sky Sports 5.30 Close
Sky Sports 2 8.00am Volleyball 9.00 On The Edge 9.30 British Formula Ford Championship 10.00 Poker 12.00pm British Formula Ford Championship 12.30 How The 2007 Cricket World Cup Was Won 3.30 Wild Spirits 4.00 Sports Unlimited 5.00 Horse Racing Special: John Smith’s People’s Race 6.00 Trans World Sport 7.00 Motor Sport 8.00 Horse Racing Special: John Smith’s People’s Race 9.00 Sailing: America’s Cup 10.00 Big Fight Countdown 10.30 European Tour Weekly 11.00 Horse Racing Special: John Smith’s People’s Race 12.00am Sailing: America’s Cup 1.00 Horse Racing Special: John Smith’s People’s Race 2.00 Close
Sky Sports 3 8.00am Squash 10.00 Pool 11.00 Aerobics: Oz Style 11.30 Racing News 12.00pm Volleyball 1.00 Pool 2.00 Poker: Sports Stars Challenge 4.00 Squash 6.00 Irish Greyhound Racing 6.30 Total Rugby 7.00 Watersports World 8.00 Squash 10.00 Watersports World 11.00 Powerboat: P1 World Championship 12.00am Max Power 1.00 Watersports World 2.00 Volleyball Victoria Nangle
extraterrestrial Sky One
BBC3
BBC4
ITV2
ITV3
E4
More4
Living
12.00pm Angel 1.00 Best Of Bones 2.00 Cold Case 3.00 Las Vegas 4.00 Stargate SG-1 (x2) 6.00 Stargate Atlantis 7.00 The Simpsons (x2) 8.00 Futurama (x2) 9.00 The Dresden Files 10.00 Lost 11.00 Law And Order 12.00am Stargate Atlantis 1.00 Las Vegas 1.50 Rock Stars’ Families
7.00pm Castaway 7.30 Fashion Victim Support 8.00 Wedding Stories 9.00 F*** Off I’m Ginger 10.00 FILM: Enigma (2001) 11.55 Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps (x2) 12.55am American Dad (x2) 1.35 F*** Off I’m Ginger 2.35 Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps (x2)
7.00pm Timewatch 7.50 Diary Of A Nobody Shorts 8.00 The World 8.30 Thoroughly Modern: The Typewriter 9.00 Saki: Who Killed Mrs De Ropp? 10.00 The Double Life Of Saki 10.55 Menace Of The Masses 11.55 Thoroughly Modern: The Typewriter 12.25am Saki: Who Killed Mrs De Ropp?
2.00pm The Jeremy Kyle Show 3.00 The Ricki Lake Show 3.50 Sally Jessy Raphael 4.40 Airline USA 5.10 Airline USA 5.40 Judge Judy 7.00 Smallville 8.00 FILM: Coyote Ugly (2000) 10.00 Coronation Street 10.30 Deadline 11.35 Jack Osbourne: Adrenaline Junkie II 12.35am Deadline
12.55pm Hannay 2.00 Never The Twain 2.30 Tales Of The Unexpected 3.00 Cagney And Lacey 4.00 Pie In The Sky 5.05 Quantum Leap 6.05 Rising Damp 6.40 Film File 6.50 Lovejoy 8.00 Agatha Christie’s Poirot 9.00 Rising Damp 9.35 FILM: Clue (1985) 11.30 Lovejoy 12.40am Heartbeat
1.00pm McFly Unzipped 2.00 Switched 2.30 Ed 3.30 The OC 4.30 Hollyoaks 5.00 Friends (x2) 6.00 Scrubs (x2) 7.00 Hollyoaks 7.30 The War At Home 8.00 Friends (x2) 9.00 Ugly Betty 10.00 Miss Match. See highlights. 11.00 Desperate Housewives 12.00am Scrubs (x2)
4.00pm FILM: Boy On A Dolphin (1957) 6.05 Deal Or No Deal 7.00 Grand Designs 8.00 More4 News 8.30 The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 9.00 Shrink Rap 10.00 Grand Designs: Trade Secrets 10.30 Travels With My Camera: Death In Santaland 11.35 NYPD Blue 12.35am The Daily Show With Jon Stewart
2.00pm Bewitched (x2) 3.00 Close To Home 4.00 Charmed (x2) 6.00 America’s Next Top Model 7.00 The X Files 8.00 Extreme: Skinny Celebrities 3 9.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 10.00 Criminal Minds 11.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 12.00am The X Files
UK TV Gold
Paramount
Discovery
Sci Fi
Sky Movies
Sky Movies
Film4
TCM
12.00pm Dallas 1.00 Pride And Prejudice (x2) 3.00 Sharpe 5.00 Dallas (x2) 7.00 Some Mothers Do ‘Ave ‘Em 7.40 The Thin Blue Line 8.20 The Vicar Of Dibley 9.00 Dalziel And Pascoe 11.20 The Royle Family 12.00am The Royle Family 12.40 Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps 1.20 Room 101
3.00pm Two And A Half Men (x2) 4.00 King Of Queens (x2) 5.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (x2) 6.00 Less Than Perfect (x2) 7.00 Scrubs (x2) 8.00 That 70s Show (x2) 9.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (x2) 10.00 Sex And The City 10.35 South Park (x2) 11.35 The World Stands Up 12.05am Live At The Fringe
3.00pm Forensic Detectives 4.00 Time Team 5.00 How It’s Made (x2) 6.00 American Chopper 7.00 Mythbusters 8.00 How Do They Do It? 8.30 How It’s Made 9.00 Decoding Disaster 10.00 The Perfect Disaster: Super Tornado 11.00 Deadliest Catch 12.00am The FBI Files 1.00 Murder Trail
12.00pm Farscape 1.00 Star Trek 2.00 The Lost World 3.00 FILM: Faultline (2004) 5.00 Tru Calling 6.00 The Lost World 7.00 Roswell 8.00 Dark Angel 9.00 Heroes (x3) 12.00am Medium 1.00 Heroes (x3) 4.00 Profiler 5.00 The Lost World
2.30pm A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Forum (1966) 4.10 Mr Music (1950) 6.10 The Young Lions (1958) 9.00 A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Forum (1966) 10.45 The Killing Of Sister George (1968) 1.15am DOA (1950) 2.50 Dr Phibes Rises Again (1973)
12.00pm Sideways (2004) 2.10 Bed And Board (1970) 4.00 Rice Rhapsody (2004) 6.00 Classics Close Up 6.30 Hail Columbia! 7.20 Bed And Board (1970) 9.00 Sideways (2004) 11.10 Blue Velvet (1986) David Lynch classic starring Dennis Hopper. 1.20am The Portrait Of A Lady (1996)
1.00pm Queen Bee (1955) 2.45 Dragonwyck (1946) 4.55 The Iron Petticoat (1956) 6.40 Ed TV (1999) 9.00 Zoolander (2001) Ben Stiller stars as a dim male model who’s brainwashed – doesn’t take long – into being an assassin. Fun. 10.40 Blue Juice (1995) 12.35am Piranha (1978) 2.20 Star Maps (1997)
12.55pm Grand Hotel (1932) 3.00 The Thin Man (1934) 4.45 That Forsyte Woman (1949) 6.55 The Adventures Of Don Juan (1948) 9.00 Some Came Running (1958) 11.30 Pennies From Heaven (1981) 1.25am Teleshopping 1.45 No Guts, No Glory: 75 Years Of Award Winners
Classics
Indie
065_LS319_TV_Thurs
4/25/07
3:08 PM
Page 1
thursday 3 Panorama BBC1, 8pm Babies! Brilliant mewling and puking bundles of joy that they are, they don’t appear to be a priority in the NHS, according to this latest investigation into our maternity services. With NHS spending at a high and midwives and patients feeling the care is at a low, Jeremy Vine tries to uncover this incongruity.
Shark Five, 10pm Isn’t it amazing when cases link in legal dramas? Yes, 15 years ago an uncannily similar story of child abduction and murder took place and Stark’s not letting go of this remarkable coincidence. And Julie’s having to let go of her previous saintly image of her mother. Oops! That one’s gonna be a clanger.
Supernatural ITV2, 11pm The hunky – but not fraternally similar in appearance in any way – brothers who hunt dead things that kill, come across an even more unusual case this week – an angel that causes people to murder... cheerfully. Always best to do horrid things with a smile they say, but surely this is stretching things.
terrestrial
sport
BBC1
BBC2
ITV1
Channel 4
Five
Sky Sports 1
6.00am Breakfast 9.15 Found 10.00 Homes Under The Hammer 11.00 To Buy Or Not To Buy 11.30 Car Booty 12.15pm Bargain Hunt 1.00 BBC News; Weather 1.30 Regional News And Weather 1.40 Neighbours 2.05 Doctors 2.35 Diagnosis Murder 3.20 BBC News; Weather; Regional News 3.25 Lazytown 3.50 Watch My Chops 4.00 The Basil Brush Show 4.30 Extreme Animals 5.00 Blue Peter 5.25 Newsround 5.35 Neighbours
6.00am – 10.15 CBeebies 10.30 Look And Read 10.50 Music Makers 11.10 English Express 11.30 Big Slam Poetry 11.50 Primary Geography 12.00pm The Daily Politics 12.30 Working Lunch 1.00 World Championship Snooker
6.00am GMTV 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 10.30 This Morning 12.30pm Loose Women 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News; Weather 2.00 Midsomer Murders 3.00 Half Ton Hospital With Jeremy Kyle 4.00 Daily Cooks 5.00 The Royal
6.05am Making It 6.10 The Hoobs (x2) 7.00 Freshly Squeezed 7.25 Everybody Loves Raymond 7.55 Just Shoot Me (x2) 8.55 Frasier (x2) 9.50 Will And Grace 10.20 Without A Trace (x2) 12.00pm News At Noon 12.30 Life Begins Again 1.30 FILM: Sergeant Rutledge (1960) 3.30 Countdown 4.15 Deal Or No Deal 5.00 The New Paul O’Grady Show
6.00am You’re On Sky Sports 7.00 Sailing: America’s Cup 8.00 Trans World Sport 9.00 Powerboat: P1 World Championship 10.00 European Tour Weekly 10.30 LIVE European Tour Golf 12.30pm Big Fight Countdown 1.00 LIVE Sailing: America’s Cup 3.30 LIVE European Tour Golf 5.30 FIFA Futbol Mundial 6.00 Guinness Rugby Club 7.30 LIVE Premier League Darts 11.00 Guinness Rugby Club 12.30am FIFA Futbol Mundial 1.00 Premier League Darts
6.00 BBC News And Weather 6.30 South East Today; Weather 7.00 Castaway Danny meets the castaways and reviews their week on the island. Could do better? 7.30 EastEnders Ian’s plan to annoy Phil backfires. Stop teasing the tiger, Bealey. 8.00 Panorama See highlights. 9.00 Hustle Drama series about a team of con artists. The Hustlers are off to sunny Los Angeles for their first con without old leader, Mickey. New boss Danny is out to prove himself and talks them into a scam, which might prove to be way over their heads. In the land of movies and stardom, can the gang really get away with selling the famous Hollywood sign from high in the Hollywood hills? What are you talking about? It’s a bargain! 10.00 BBC News; Regional News; Weather 10.35 Question Time On election night, David Dimbleby chairs a debate from London. The panel includes William Hague and Shirley Williams. 11.35 Election Night 2007 David Dimbleby leads the team for the 2007 local elections, Tony Blair’s last major test as leader of his party. Graphics tricks explain what’s happening as the results come in. Features regular local updates and a full regional summary at 12.15am and 1.30am.
6.00 Eggheads Eggyhead not eggy bread. There’s a difference. Don’t try and eat the TV for breakfast. Wrong. 6.30 Great British Menu The 2006 finalist for the South East, Atul Kochhar is fighting hard against his opponent Stuart Gillies to hang on to his title. Sort of a duelling match with wooden spoons. 7.00 World Championship Snooker The commentary team is Clive Everton, Dennis Taylor, John Virgo and Willie Thorne. Don’t they just wish they were playing rather than talking about it? Green with envy they are. Matching the felt. 9.00 The Catherine Tate Show Award-winning comedy sketch series co-written and performed by the versatile comedy actress. Gingers For Justice take to the rooftops. 9.30 Roman’s Empire Comedy series. When Leo wakes up in bed with his ex-girlfriend Nikki’s younger sister Kelly after a drunken night of passion, schemes are soon afoot. 10.00 The Graham Norton Show Norton hilarity ensues. 10.30 Newsnight Jeremy Paxman goes ‘Grr’ at election stuff. 11.35 Desi DNA Asian arts and lifestyle magazine. 12.05am World Championship Snooker 12.55 Joins BBC News 24 2.00 BBC Learning Zone: Schools: GCSE Bitesize Revision (x2)
6.00 Meridian Tonight 6.30 ITV Evening News; Weather 7.00 Emmerdale Jimmy and Kelly contemplate doing a runner. Everyone’s at it these days! 7.30 Cathedral Cities Today, Hannah meets up with her father, Bishop Michael Scott-Joynt, in Winchester. Keep it in the family. 8.00 The Bill Emma wakes up frightened in a Sun Hill cell after her terrifying fight with Matt. As Heaton briefs Gina and Jo about the incident, Matt comes round in hospital and says that Emma tried to kill him. This is more than a ‘feisty’ relationship. 9.00 The Last Detective Top villain Jimmy The Gent is released from prison, but within 24 hours he is murdered – before he can publish his memoirs. Do they hold the clue to the identity of his killer? Or are they the ultimate in modern etiquette guides? 10.30 ITV News; Weather 11.00 Meridian Soccer Night Hit the round thing with your foot so it goes into the big net thing. 11.30 The Last Word Political show in which MPs and assorted guests look into the big stories in the region. Presented by Phil Hornby. 12.00am ITV Play: Make Your Play 4.05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 5.00 ITV Nightscreen 5.30 ITV Early Morning News
6.00 The Simpsons 6.30 Hollyoaks Zak and Kris realise Zoe may be in danger, but she is already cornered in Will’s room with no way out. Another major nutter. 7.00 Channel 4 News 7.55 3 Minute Wonder: Watch This Space 8.00 A Place In The Sun Amanda Lamb continues her world tour looking for properties for £80,000. World domination, flat by flat. 8.30 Chaos At The Chateau Things are starting to look up at the hotel, plus there may be the distant sound of wedding bells. Big cake, big dress, big things to come. 9.00 Lie Of The Land Doc by awardwinner Molly Dineen showing how in recent years Britain’s farming industry has been decimated by disease, development and legislation. 10.30 FILM: The Score (2001) Starring Robert De Niro, Marlon Brando, Edward Norton. A criminal decides to get out of the biz to run a jazz club, but is persuaded into ‘one last job’. Of course. 12.50am 4 Music: Ibiza Rocks With Sony Ericsson 1.20 Rockfeedback 1.50 FILM: How To Get Ahead In Advertising (1989) 3.30 Dupe 3.40 Bus Pass Boob Jobs 4.40 Wild Things 5.25 Countdown
6.10am Fifi & The Flowertots 6.25 Franny’s Feet 6.40 Bird Bath 6.45 Funky Town 6.50 Milkshake! 7.20 Miss Spider’s Sunny Patch Friends 7.30 Little Princess 7.45 Make Way For Noddy 8.00 Say It With Noddy 8.05 Fifi & The Flowertots 8.20 Peppa Pig 8.25 Thomas & Friends 8.40 Old Bear Stories 8.50 Mio Mao 9.00 Wright Stuff 10.30 Trisha 11.30 News 12.00pm Home & Away 12.30 Britains Worst... 1.30 Russell Grant’s Postcards 1.40 FILM: Cockleshell Heroes (1956) 3.35 News 3.40 FILM: Final Run (1999) 5.30 News 6.00 Home And Away Ric’s last hopes of proving his innocence are destroyed. That poor boy’s been through the mill. Give him a break. 6.30 Two And A Half Men 7.00 Five News 7.15 How Not To Decorate Bringing 70s pools winners’ chic up to date with Colin and Justin. Loving the optics. 8.00 Ann Maurice: Interior Rivalry The four remaining contestants battle for a place in the final this week as they have to pitch their home staging ideas to a real client. 9.00 House House wakes up a patient in a coma in order to help treat the man’s dying son. But when the man is told that his recovery is only temporary and that he has just 24 hours before he returns to his coma, he decides to check himself out and go on a road trip to Atlantic City, with House and Wilson in tow. 10.00 Shark See highlights. 11.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation Nick investigates a grisly murder apparently linked to the ‘narcocorrido’, a Mexican subculture that glorifies crime. Warrick looks into the shooting of a man found dead in a casino car park. 12.00am Football Night 1.00 Quiz Call 4.00 Dutch Football 5.10 Football Argentina
Sky Sports 2 6.00am Aerobics: Oz Style 6.30 On The Edge 7.00 Aerobics: Oz Style 7.30 On The Edge 8.00 Watersports World 9.00 Big Fight Countdown 9.30 Irish Greyhound Racing 10.00 Sailing: America’s Cup 11.00 Watersports World 12.00pm On The Edge 12.30 Irish Greyhound Racing 1.00 Trans World Sport 2.00 Horse Racing Special: John Smith’s People’s Race 3.00 Total Rugby 3.30 Big Fight Countdown 4.00 Extreme Carp 4.30 Trans World Sport 5.30 ATP Tennis 6.00 Netball: Super League 8.00 Golf Night 11.00 Sailing: America’s Cup 12.00am Race World 1.00 Golf Night
Sky Sports 3 9.00am Horse Racing Special: John Smith’s People’s Race 10.00 Pool 11.00 Aerobics: Oz Style 11.30 Racing News 12.00pm Horse Racing Special: John Smith’s People’s Race 1.00 European Tour Golf 3.00 Pool 4.00 Watersports World 5.00 Powerboat: P1 World Championship 6.00 Extreme Carp 6.30 NBA Action 7.00 Race World 8.00 Trans World Sport 9.00 WWE Late Night Raw 11.00 Extreme Championship Wrestling 12.00am The Poker Show 12.30 Extreme Carp 1.00 ATP Tennis 1.30 On The Edge 2.00 ATP Tennis 2.30 The Poker Show
Victoria Nangle
extraterrestrial Sky One
BBC3
BBC4
ITV2
ITV3
E4
More4
Living
1.00pm Best Of Bones 2.00 Cold Case 3.00 Las Vegas 4.00 Stargate SG-1 (x2) 6.00 Stargate Atlantis 7.00 The Simpsons (x2) 8.00 The Beckhams Go To Hollywood 9.00 Bones 10.00 Cold Case 11.00 Law And Order 12.00am Stargate Atlantis 1.00 Las Vegas 1.50 Very Worst... 2.40 Star Trek: Voyager 3.30 Hex
7.00pm The Panic Room 8.00 Britain’s Worst Teeth 9.00 The Bulls*** Detective 10.00 EastEnders 10.30 The Real Hustle 11.00 Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps (x2) 12.00am The Bulls*** Detective 12.55 The Real Hustle 1.25 Dog Borstal Unleashed
7.00pm The Avengers 7.50 Diary Of A Nobody Shorts 8.00 The World 8.30 Once A Soldier 9.00 The Edwardians In Colour: The Wonderful World Of Albert Kahn 10.00 The Diary Of A Nobody 10.30 Never Mind The Full Stops 11.00 Dinner With Portillo 11.30 Once A Soldier 12.00am The Edwardians In Colour
3.00pm The Ricki Lake Show 3.50 Sally Jessy Raphael 4.40 Airline USA 5.10 Airline USA 5.40 Judge Judy 7.00 Smallville 8.00 New Homes From Hell 9.00 Katie And Peter: The Next Chapter 10.00 Deadline 11.00 Supernatural. See highlights. 12.00am Sally Morgan: Star Psychic
2.00pm Never The Twain 2.35 Tales Of The Unexpected 3.00 Cagney And Lacey 4.00 Pie In The Sky 5.05 Quantum Leap 6.05 Rising Damp 6.40 Movies Now 6.50 Lovejoy 8.00 The Two Ronnies 9.00 Rising Damp 9.30 Blue Murder 11.00 Hack 12.00am Lovejoy 1.00 Heartbeat
1.00pm Natalie Portman Hot Stuff 2.00 Switched 2.25 Ed 3.25 The OC 4.30 Hollyoaks 5.00 Friends (x2) 6.00 Scrubs (x2) 7.00 Hollyoaks 7.30 The War At Home 8.00 Friends 8.30 Friends 9.00 ER 10.00 Sex In Court 10.30 FILM: Sudden Death (1995) 12.35am Scrubs 1.00 Scrubs 1.30 The OC
3.00pm ER 4.00 FILM: Belle Starr (1941) 5.35 A Place In The Sun 6.05 Deal Or No Deal 7.00 Grand Designs 8.00 More4 News 8.30 The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 9.00 Grand Designs 10.00 Grand Designs: Trade Secrets 10.35 Without A Trace 11.35 NYPD Blue 12.35am The Daily Show
12.55pm The Fix 1.00 Will And Grace (x2) 2.00 Bewitched (x2) 3.00 Close To Home 4.00 Charmed (x2) 6.00 America’s Next Top Model 7.00 The X Files 8.00 Kath And Kim 8.30 Campus Ladies 9.00 CSI: Miami 10.00 Boston Legal 11.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 12.00am The X Files 1.00 Boston Legal
UK TV Gold
Paramount
Discovery
Sci Fi
Sky Movies
Sky Movies
Film4
TCM
5.00pm Dallas 6.00 Dallas 7.00 Some Mothers Do ‘Ave ‘Em 7.40 The Thin Blue Line 8.20 The Vicar Of Dibley 9.00 Jim’ll Fix It Strikes Again 9.30 TV Now And Then 10.10 Only Fools And Horses 11.10 The Royle Family 11.50 The Royle Family 12.30am Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps
3.00pm Two And A Half Men (x2) 4.00 King Of Queens (x2) 5.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (x2) 6.00 Less Than Perfect (x2) 7.00 Scrubs (x2) 8.00 That 70s Show (x2) 9.00 Scrubs (x2) 10.00 Sex And The City 10.35 South Park 11.05 South Park 11.35 The World Stands Up 12.05am Live At The Fringe
12.00pm Mythbusters 1.00 Deadliest Catch 2.00 The FBI Files 3.00 Forensic Detectives 4.00 Time Team 5.00 How It’s Made (x2) 6.00 American Chopper 7.00 Mythbusters 8.00 How Do They Do It? 8.30 How It’s Made 9.00 My Shocking Story 10.00 Deadliest Catch Special 12.00am The FBI Files
12.00pm Farscape 1.00 Star Trek 2.00 The Lost World 3.00 FILM: Loch Ness (1996) 5.00 Dark Angel 6.00 The Lost World 7.00 Roswell 8.00 Dark Angel 9.00 Heroes (x3) 12.00am Medium 1.00 Heroes (x3) 4.00 Profiler 5.00 The Lost World
12.20pm Classics Close Up 12.50 Romeo And Juliet (1968) 3.10 Three Faces West (1940) 4.55 The Little Foxes (1941) 7.00 Walk, Don’t Run (1966) 9.00 Romeo And Juliet (1968) 11.20 The Ipcress File (1965) 1.10am The Unforgiven (1960) 3.15 I Want To Live! (1958)
4.00pm Wal-Mart: The High Cost Of Low Price 6.00 The Last Buffalo (1990) 6.50 Indie Close-Up 7.20 Bombon, El Perro (2004) 9.00 Before Sunset (2004) 10.30 Asylum (2005) 12.15am Wal-Mart: The High Cost Of Low Price 2.10 Bombon, El Perro (2004)
1.00pm Autumn Leaves (1956) 3.10 Leave Her To Heaven (1946) 5.15 Run Silent, Run Deep (1958) 7.00 Northfork (2003) 9.00 The Sum Of All Fears (2002) Jack Ryan aka Ben Affleck, has to save the world from terrorists. Yes he does. 11.20 Antwone Fisher (2002) 1.40am The Golden Coach (1953)
7.05am Joe The Busybody (1972) 8.35 Ziegfeld Girl (1941) 11.00 Beau Brummell (1954) 1.05pm For Me And My Gal (1942) 3.00 The Prize (1963) 5.30 Gaslight (1944) 7.35 The King’s Thief (1955) 9.00 Body Heat (1981) 11.05 Lolita (1962) 1.50am Teleshopping 2.10 Hit Man (1972) 3.40 Go West (1940)
Classics
Indie
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friday 4 Natural World BBC2, 9pm The Beeb hangs ten with the exotic wildlife of Hawaii’s famous surf zone plus the scientists and conservationists who are trying to protect them. Having dealt with increasing numbers of holidaymakers, the local turtles, dolphins and seals are now fighting to cope with pollution, plastic and other modern evils.
Super Bears Five, 8pm Cute ‘n’ cuddly they may be from a distance, but as this enlightening documentary shows, you wouldn’t want to encounter one up close going after your picnic basket. As well as possessing a keen sense of smell (and those big, nasty paws), apparently they can come at you with surprising speed. Yikes.
Spiderman 3 UK Premiere Special ITV2, 12am Poor Sam Raimi. After making the first two Spiderman movies about as complicated as superhero franchises generally get, now he’s had to tie up all of Peter Parker’s loose ends in one fell swoop. Find out how he does it at the multiplex, and as an appetiser, here’s Tobey, Kristin and the rest.
terrestrial
sport
BBC1
BBC2
ITV1
Channel 4
Five
Sky Sports 1
6.00am Breakfast 9.15 Found 10.00 Homes Under The Hammer 11.00 To Buy Or Not To Buy 11.30 Car Booty 12.15pm Bargain Hunt 1.00 BBC News; Weather 1.30 Regional News And Weather 1.40 Neighbours 2.05 Doctors 2.35 Diagnosis Murder 3.20 BBC News; Weather; Regional News 3.25 Lazytown 3.50 The Likeaballs 4.00 Prank Patrol 4.30 Extreme Animals 5.00 Totally Doctor Who 5.25 Newsround 5.35 Neighbours
6.00am Fimbles 6.20 The Story Makers 6.35 Balamory 7.00 Arthur 7.15 ChuckleVision 7.30 Get 100 8.00 The Story Of Tracy Beaker 8.15 Krypto The Superdog 8.30 Jackanory Junior 8.40 Numberjacks 9.00 Nina And The Neurons 9.15 Brum 9.25 Me Too! 9.45 Something Special 10.00 Postman Pat 10.15 The Roly Mo Show 10.30 In Search Of Myths And Heroes 11.30 The Daily Politics 1.00pm Garden Invaders 1.30 Working Lunch 2.00 World Championship Snooker
6.00am GMTV 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 10.30 This Morning 12.30pm Loose Women 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News; Weather 2.00 Midsomer Murders 3.00 Half Ton Hospital With Jeremy Kyle 4.00 Daily Cooks 5.00 The Royal
6.10am The Hoobs (x2) 7.00 Freshly Squeezed 7.25 Everybody Loves Raymond 7.55 Just Shoot Me (x2) 8.55 Frasier (x2) 9.50 Will And Grace 10.20 Without A Trace (x2) 12.00pm News At Noon 12.30 Burgh Island: Checking Into History 12.45 Life Begins Again 1.50 FILM: Dakota Incident (1956) 3.30 Countdown 4.15 Deal Or No Deal 5.00 The New Paul O’Grady Show
6.00 BBC News And Weather The latest news and weather. 6.30 South East Today; Weather Regional news magazine. 7.00 A Question Of Sport Sports quiz hosted by Sue Barker with regular captains Ally McCoist and Matt Dawson. 7.30 Rogue Traders Matt Allwright and Dan Penteado go undercover. 8.00 EastEnders It’s May’s birthday, but she struggles to cope. Billy puts pressure on Honey. 8.30 My Family Michael succeeds in placing the whole family on The Weakest Link, but Anne Robinson is about to raise more difficult questions than expected. 9.00 Have I Got News For You Comedy quiz show. 9.30 Ruddy Hell! It’s Harry And Paul Nelson Mandela goes shoplifting and the Cafe Polski girls get angry behind the counter. 10.00 BBC News; Regional News; Weather 10.35 Friday Night With Jonathan Ross Guests include comedianturned-actor Rob Brydon and Oscarnominated actress Helena Bonham Carter. 11.35 FILM: ¡Three Amigos! (1986) Starring Chevy Chase, Steve Martin, Martin Short, Alfonso Arau, Tony Plana and Patrice Martinez. 1.20am Joins BBC News 24
6.00 Eggheads 6.30 Great British Menu Atul Kochhar and Stuart Gillies compete to represent the South East in the national finals. 7.00 World Championship Snooker Hazel Irvine introduces live coverage from the concluding sessions of this year’s quarter-finals. 9.00 Natural World See highlights. 9.50 Shearwater Island How thousands of strange nocturnal birds make their home on the tiny island of Bardsey in North Wales. 10.00 The Apprentice: You’re Fired Adrian Chiles grills the newly fired candidate from the Apprentice. 10.30 Newsnight Jeremy Paxman introduces comprehensive coverage of today’s important national and international news stories. 11.20 World Championship Snooker The semi final line-up will soon be complete. Hazel Irvine introduces highlights from the quarter-finals. The commentary team is Clive Everton, Dennis Taylor, John Virgo, Willie Thorne, Terry Griffiths and Neal Foulds. 12.10am World Championship Snooker Extra Ray Stubbs introduces highlights from the quarter-finals at the Crucible, Sheffield. 2.00 BBC Learning Zone: Schools: GCSE Bitesize Revision: German 4.00 GCSE Bitesize Revision
6.00 Meridian Tonight Local news magazine. Including Meridian weather. 6.30 ITV Evening News; Weather The latest national and international news. 7.00 Emmerdale Will Kelly get banged up when she’s late for her trial? 7.30 Coronation Street Deirdre is left deserted when Ken visits an old flame and Paul hits the bottle as he struggles to come to terms with things. 8.00 Fraud Frenzy: Tonight Fiona Foster reports on the damage done by out-of-control credit card fraud. 8.30 Agatha Christie’s Marple When a young blonde is found strangled in the library of Gossington Hall, Dolly Bantry quickly calls in her old friend Miss Marple to help her. 10.30 ITV News; Weather 11.00 It Shouldn’t Happen To A Travel Reporter Alan Whicker, Judith Chalmers, Benedict Allen, Magenta De Vine and Paul O’Grady are among those sharing their highs and lows of travel reporting, giving a unique insight into one of the most envied professions in TV. 12.00am ITV Play: Make Your Play ITV’s interactive game show with huge cash prizes for the drunk and / or gullible to win. 4.10 60 Minute Makeover 5.00 ITV Nightscreen
6.00 The Simpsons Homer fakes his own death to avoid doing a tedious job for Mr Burns. 6.30 Hollyoaks The students try to recover from the incidents with Will, and one of them decides to return home. 7.00 Channel 4 News 8.00 A Place In The Sun: Home Or Away Jason Crawley from Bermondsey wants to run a pub in Kent but his partner Nichola Wren has her heart set on a B&B in Spain. 9.00 Ugly Betty Betty impulsively asks her orthodontist to be her date after Henry insists on her going to Charlie’s birthday party. 10.00 Derren Brown: Trick Or Treat Derren teaches a woman to play concert-standard piano in just two weeks. 10.30 Peep Show Jeremy gets a job working as a handyman for his hero, techno musician Russell, but Mark suspects Russell’s motivation. 11.05 Peter Kay’s Phoenix Nights 11.40 Transmission With T-Mobile Music from The View, Funeral for a Friend and Bonde De Role. 12.40am 4 Music: The JD Set Presents: Hot Club De Paris Hot Club de Paris perform at the JD Set. 12.55 4 Music: 4Play: Simple Kid 1.10 Goalissimo! 2.05 PartyPoker.com 3.05 Gumball 3000 3.35 Trans World Sport
6.00am The Save-Ums! 6.10 Fifi And The Flowertots 6.25 Franny’s Feet 6.40 Bird Bath 6.45 Funky Town 6.50 Milkshake! 7.20 Miss Spider’s Sunny Patch Friends 7.30 Little Princess 7.45 Noddy 8.00 Say It With Noddy 8.05 Fifi And The Flowertots 8.20 Peppa Pig 8.25 Thomas & Friends 8.40 Old Bear Stories 8.50 Mio Mao 9.00 Wright Stuff 10.30 Trisha Goddard 11.30 Five News 12.00pm Home And Away 12.30 Britain’s Worst... 1.30 Russell Grant’s Postcards 1.35 FILM: The Long Shot (2004) 3.40 News 3.45 FILM: Family Plan (2005) 5.30 News 6.00 Home And Away Ric’s day of reckoning arrives as his trial begins. Can Rachel and Kim mend the rift in their relationship? Tensions explode in the wake of Ric’s trial. 6.30 Two And A Half Men Rose tries to help the brothers sort out their feelings when Charlie and Alan take their personal frustrations out on each other. 7.00 Five News National and international news. 7.30 Mean Machines 8.00 Super Bears See highlights. 9.00 NCIS Teenagers find a set of marine dog tags in a national forest and the team’s initial search of the area leads them to suspect a serial killer preying on women could be at large. 10.00 Law And Order: Criminal Intent When Phoebe Morton is murdered on the phone with a 911 operator, Goran and Eames take the case and realise Morton is one of five women murdered by the same person. 11.00 Short Angry Men: Hidden Lives Documentary about men whose height has seriously affected their lives in some very different ways. 12.00am Prison Break C-Note gets into a tricky situation when a robber holds up the diner he is in. 1.00 Quiz Call 5.35 Wildlife SOS
6.00am Trans World Sport 7.00 WWE Raw 9.00 On The Edge 9.30 FIFA Futbol Mundial 10.00 Aerobics: Oz Style 10.30 LIVE European Tour Golf 12.30pm FIFA Futbol Mundial 1.00 LIVE Sailing: America’s Cup 3.30 LIVE European Tour Golf 5.30 Premier League Preview 6.00 Soccer AM’s All Sports Show 7.00 Premier League Preview 7.30 Big Fight Countdown 8.00 LIVE Conference Football 10.15 Big Fight Countdown 10.45 Premier League Preview 11.15 Soccer AM’s All Sports Show 12.15am Conference Football 2.30 Big Fight Countdown 3.00 Premier League Preview 3.30 Soccer AM’s All Sports Show 4.30 Premier League Preview 5.00 Big Fight Countdown 5.30 FIFA Futbol Mundial
Sky Sports 2 6.00am Aerobics: Oz Style 6.30 On The Edge 7.00 Sailing: America’s Cup 8.00 Premier League Darts 11.30 On The Edge 12.00pm Race World 1.00 Guinness Rugby Club 2.30 Trans World Sport 3.30 The Poker Show 4.00 Race World 5.00 FIFA Futbol Mundial 5.30 Moto + 6.00 On The Edge 6.30 Gillette World Sport 7.00 Rugby Union 8.00 LIVE Rugby Union 10.00 Sailing: America’s Cup 11.00 Moto + 11.30 Gillette World Sport 12.00am Sailing: America’s Cup 1.00 Golf Night 4.00 Conference Football
Sky Sports 3 7.30am The Poker Show 8.00 ATP Tennis 8.30 Guinness Rugby Club 10.00 Pool 11.00 Aerobics: Oz Style 11.30 Racing News 12.00pm ATP Tennis 12.30 NBA Action 1.00 European Tour Golf 3.00 Netball: Super League 5.00 WWE Raw 7.00 LIVE Boots N All Special 7.30 LIVE Rugby League 10.00 WWE Late Night Smackdown 12.00am WWE Late Night Bottom Line 1.00 Boots N All Special 1.30 Rugby League 4.00 Sailing: America’s Cup 5.00 Extreme Carp 5.30 Irish Greyhound Racing
Matt Chittock
extraterrestrial Sky One
BBC3
BBC4
ITV2
ITV3
E4
More4
Living
9.00am Project Catwalk 10.00 Stargate SG-1 (x2) 12.00pm Angel 1.00 Best Of Bones 2.00 Cold Case 3.00 Las Vegas 4.00 Stargate SG-1 (x2) 6.00 Stargate Atlantis 7.00 The Simpsons (x3) 8.30 Crash Test Dummies 9.00 FILM: US Marshals (1997) 11.30 Law And Order 12.30am Best Unseen Ads
7pm Castaway 8.00 Freaky Eaters: Addicted To Chicken 9.00 Doctor Who 9.45 Doctor Who Confidential 10.00 EastEnders 10.30 Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps (x2) 11.30 Ideal 12.00am Family Guy (x2) 12.45 Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps (x2) 1.45 Rob Brydon’s Annually Retentive
7.00pm Elgar’s Enigma: A Hidden Portrait 7.50 Diary Of A Nobody Shorts 8.00 The World 8.30 In Concert: Cat Stevens 9.10 Imagine... The Artist Formerly Known As Cat Stevens 10.05 The BBC Four Sessions 11.05 The Avengers 11.55 The Worst Journey In The World 12.55am Marcus Brigstocke’s Trophy People
12.25pm Emmerdale 12.55 The Jeremy Kyle Show (x2) 3.00 The Ricki Lake Show 3.50 Sally Jessy Raphael 4.40 Airline USA (x2) 5.40 Judge Judy 7.00 Smallville 8.00 Airline 8.30 American Idol (x2) 10.30 Katie And Peter: The Next Chapter 11.30 Coronation Street 12.00am Spider-Man 3: See highlights
2.00pm Never The Twain 2.30 Tales Of The Unexpected 3.00 Cagney And Lacey 4.00 Pie In The Sky 5.05 Quantum Leap 6.05 Rising Damp 6.40 Film File 6.50 Lovejoy 8.00 Pie In The Sky 9.00 FILM: Tom Horn (1980) 11.00 Tales Of The Unexpected (x2) 12.10am Lovejoy 1.10 FILM: Tom Horn (1980)
2.05pm Switched 2.40 Ed 3.30 The OC 4.30 Hollyoaks 5.00 Friends (x2) 6.00 Scrubs (x2) 7.00 Hollyoaks 7.30 The War At Home 8.00 Friends (x2) 9.00 Wife Swap 10.00 Wife Swap: The Aftermath 10.30 FILM: The Naked Gun 2 1/2: The Smell Of Fear (1991) 12.10am Scrubs (x2) 1.05 Wife Swap
12.00pm A Place In The Sun 1.05 Deal Or No Deal 2.00 ER (x2) 4.00 FILM: Kidnapped (1971) 5.55 3 Minute Wonder: Second Lives (x2) 6.05 Deal Or No Deal 7.00 Grand Designs 8.00 More4 News 8.30 The Daily Show 9.00 Without A Trace 10.00 The Closer 11.00 Erotomania 12.00am NYPD Blue
12.00pm Maury 12.55 The Fix 1.00 Will And Grace (x2) 2.00 Bewitched (x2) 3.00 Close To Home 4.00 Charmed (x2) 6.00 America’s Next Top Model 7.00 The X Files 8.00 Close To Home 9.00 Criminal Minds 10.00 CSI: Miami 11.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 12.00am The X Files 1.00 Criminal Minds
UK TV Gold
Paramount
Discovery
Sci Fi
Sky Movies
Sky Movies
Film4
TCM
3.20pm The Vicar Of Dibley 4.00 Only Fools And Horses 5.00 Dallas (x2) 7.00 Some Mothers Do ‘Ave ‘Em 7.40 The Thin Blue Line 8.20 The Vicar Of Dibley 9.00 Fawlty Towers 9.40 One Foot In The Grave 10.20 EuroMillions: Boom Bang A Bang 10.30 FILM: Species (1995) 12.35am Fawlty Towers (x2) 2.00 Room 101
3.00pm Two And A Half Men (x2) 4.00 King Of Queens (x2) 5.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (x2) 6.00 Less Than Perfect (x2) 7.00 Scrubs (x2) 8.00 That 70s Show (x2) 9.00 South Park (x5) 11.30 The World Stands Up 12.00am Live At The Fringe 1.00 South Park 1.30 The World Stands Up 2.00 Sexy Cam (x2)
2.00pm The FBI Files 3.00 Forensic Detectives 4.00 Time Team 5.00 How It’s Made (x2) 6.00 American Chopper 7.00 Mythbusters 8.00 How Do They Do It? 8.30 How It’s Made 9.00 The Perfect Disaster: Super Tornado 10.00 Decoding Disaster 11.00 Deadliest Catch Special 12.00am The FBI Files
6.00am Farscape 7.00 La Femme Nikita 8.00 Teleshopping 11.00 Andromeda 12.00pm Farscape 1.00 Star Trek 2.00 The Lost World 3.00 FILM: Inferno (2001) 5.00 Dark Angel 6.00 The Lost World 7.00 Roswell 8.00 Dark Angel (x3) 12.00am Medium 1.00 Heroes (x3) 4.00 Profiler 5.00 The Lost World
12.35pm I Was A Male War Bride (1949) 2.35 Song Of Norway (1970) 5.00 The Professionals (1966) 7.00 Classics Close Up 7.30 The Creature From The Black Lagoon (1954) 9.00 Funeral In Berlin (1966) 10.45 The Professionals (1966) 12.45am Marty (1955) 2.25 Guns Of August (1964)
12.00pm Love On The Run (1979) 2.00 The Holy Girl (2004) 4.00 All About My Mother (1999) 6.00 Sci-Fi & Horror Close-Up 6.30 Space Station 3D 7.30 Shoot The Pianist (1962) 9.00 Blood Simple (1984) 10.40 Mulholland Falls (1996) 12.35am All About My Mother (1999)
1.00pm Harriet Craig (1950) 2.45 Operation Amsterdam (1959) 4.50 The Apartment (1960) 7.15 The Beverly Hillbillies (1993) Tongue in cheek TV spin off. 9.00 Charlotte Gray (2001) 11.15 Withnail And I (1987) Booze-soaked black comedy from the pen of Bruce Robinson. 1.20am Whisky (2004)
7.05am Bridge To The Sun (1961) 9.00 Made In Paris (1966) 11.00 The Wonderful World Of The Brothers Grimm (1962) 1.25pm Bad Day At Black Rock (1955) 3.00 Ben-Hur (1959) 6.50 Mogambo (1953) 9.00 The Fugitive (1993) 11.20 The Wrong Man (1956) 1.15am Teleshopping 1.35 Freaks (1932) 2.45 Greed (1925)
Classics
Indie
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saturday 5 The Culture Show BBC2, 6.10pm Lauren Laverne gets stuck into the arts stories of the week including outstanding satirical cartoonist Steve Bell talking politics and art, Neil Hannon on how to write the perfect Eurovision song and the Manic Street Preachers on their new album. Elsewhere Mark Kermode (left) gives his view on Spider-Man 3.
Parkinson ITV1, 10.40pm ITV’s resident silver fox returns with a new series of the primetime chat show in which he sucks up to the stars. First up to the sofa is intergalactic heartthrob David Tennant plus Peep Show peep David Mitchell. Michael Bublé also performs live – giving you a chance to make a cup of tea/go down the pub.
The Worst Journey in the World BBC4, 9.05pm Nope, not the Sunday-night train from London to Brighton, but the rather more onerous trip that Captain Scott took to Antarctica before his final, ill-fated mission. Not the best planned of expeditions, given that the journey almost cost three men their lives.
terrestrial
sport
BBC1
BBC2
ITV1
Channel 4
Five
Sky Sports 1
6.00am Breakfast 10.00 Saturday Kitchen 11.30 Great British Menu 12.00pm BBC News; Weather 12.10 Football Focus 1.00 World Championship Snooker 4.30 Final Score 5.10 BBC News; Regional News; Weather 5.30 Just For Laughs
6.00am Teletubbies 6.30 Balamory 6.50 Step Inside 7.00 Batfink 7.10 Arthur 7.35 Watch My Chops 8.00 Mona The Vampire 8.30 The Story Of Tracy Beaker 9.00 Hider In The House 10.00 What’s New Scooby Doo? 10.20 The Cramp Twins 10.30 Totally Doctor Who 11.00 The Story Of Tracy Beaker 11.30 The Fairly Odd Parents 11.45 Sportsround 12.00pm See Hear 12.30 Badminton Horse Trials 4.30 World Championship Snooker 5.25 Flog It!
6.00am GMTV 9.25 Horrid Henry 9.35 Grizzly Tales For Gruesome Kids 9.50 The Amazing Adrenalini Brothers 10.00 Jungle Run 10.30 King Arthur’s Disasters 11.00 My Parents Are Aliens 11.30 Spider-Man 3: UK Premiere Special 12.00pm Saturday Cooks 1.30 ITV News; Weather 1.40 Meridian News 1.45 FILM: Murder, She Wrote: The Last Free Man (2001) 3.20 FILM: Agatha Christie’s Thirteen At Dinner (1985) 5.10 Meridian News 5.25 ITV News; Sports Results; Weather 5.40 You’ve Been Framed!
6.10am The Hoobs 6.35 The Hoobs 7.00 Goalissimo! 8.00 The Morning Line 8.55 Friends 9.25 Musicool 10.25 Popworld 11.15 Friends (x2) 12.25pm Shipwrecked 2007: The Hut Cam Diaries 12.55 Shipwrecked 2007: Battle Of The Islands 2.00 Channel 4 Racing From Newmarket And Goodwood 4.15 Location, Location, Location 4.50 Deal Or No Deal Classic 5.35 Monarchy By David Starkey
6.00am Sunrise 6.55 Franklin 7.25 Mist: Sheepdog Tales 7.35 Little Princess 7.45 Noddy (x2) 8.00 Harry And His Bucket Full Of Dinosaurs (x2) 8.30 The Book Of Pooh 9.00 Ebb And Flo 9.05 Peppa Pig 9.15 Fifi And The Flowertots 9.30 Jane And The Dragon 10.00 Fifth Gear 11.00 World’s Strongest Man 12.05pm Man Eaters: Fangs And Claws 1.05 Built For The Kill: Snake 1.50 FILM: The Woman In Question (1950) 3.25 FILM: Columbo: Requiem For A Falling Star (1973) 4.55 FILM: Rocketman (1997)
6.00am Aerobics: Oz Style 6.30 Premier League Preview 7.00 Soccer AM’s All Sports Show 8.00 UEFA Champions League Weekly 8.30 Premier League Preview 9.00 Soccer AM 12.00pm Ford Football Special 3.00 Gillette Soccer Saturday 5.15 LIVE Rugby Union 7.55 UEFA Champions League Weekly 8.25 Football First: Game Of The Day 10.15 Football First: Match Choice (x3) 2.00 LIVE Big Fight Special 5.00 Moto + 5.30 UEFA Champions League Weekly
6.00 The National Lottery People’s Quiz Jamie Theakston, Kate Garraway, Myleene Klass and William G Stewart continue their countrywide search for the UK’s best quizzer. 7.00 Doctor Who Time-travelling traumas with the Timelord in the TARDIS. Martha returns home, but has to save her family from the schemes of the monstrous Professor Lazarus. 7.45 Any Dream Will Do Graham Norton presents Andrew Lloyd Webber’s search for a new leading man for Joseph and the Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat. 8.45 Casualty Tess is in turmoil when Sam fails to show up for work. Nathan establishes contact of a new kind whilst Selena makes a tough decision affecting their future. 9.35 The National Lottery People’s Quiz 9.45 Any Dream Will Do Graham Norton reveals who will be the next potential Joseph to leave. 10.15 BBC News; Weather BBC News; Weather. 10.30 Match Of The Day Gary Lineker presents highlights of eight Premiership matches. 12.00am FILM: Throw Momma From The Train (1987) Black comedy. 1.25 Friday Night With Jonathan Ross 2.25 Joins BBC News 24
6.10 The Culture Show Arts and culture stories of the week, presented by Lauren Laverne out and about on the South Bank. See highlights. 7.00 World Championship Snooker Hazel Irvine is at The Crucible for the climax of the second semi-final where the winner will pocket at least ¬£110,000. 10.00 Have I Got A Bit More News For You Paul Merton and Ian Hislop continue to entertain in the extended version of the classic news quiz. Bill Bailey is the guest host. 10.40 TOTP 2 Special Fast-moving music show mixing today’s hits with classic performances from the Top of the Pops archives. 11.40 FILM: The Fabulous Baker Boys (1989) Comedy drama about a pair of piano-playing brothers who take on a singer when they realise that two pianos are no longer enough to make a success on the cocktaillounge circuit of Seattle. stars Jeff Bridges and a luminous Michelle Pfeiffer. 1.30am The Culture Show The Manic Street Preachers talk about their latest album and perform live. Eurovision Song Contest fan, Neil Hannon from the Divine Comedy shows how to write the perfect Eurovision song. 2.20 FILM: Miss Julie (1999)
6.40 Vernon Kay’s Gameshow Marathon This week Vernon Kay presents Name That Tune, bringing some of the nation’s best-loved songs to your living room. 7.45 Grease Is The Word: Live Zoe Ball continues the search for two people to play Danny and Sandy in a new West End production of Grease. Tonight the remaining couples sing the most popular songs from the movie as they battle it out for your votes. Producer David Ian, impresario David Gest, choreographer Brian Friedman and pop sensation Sinitta will be on hand to judge the contestants’ performances. 9.15 Who Wants To Be A Millionaire? Chris Tarrant presents the fast-paced gameshow where ten contestants compete for a place in the hot seat and the chance to walk away with the top prize of one million pounds. 10.10 Grease Is The Word Results The two couples with the lowest votes from the public perform in a Grease sing-off. 10.40 Parkinson Michael Parkinson returns with a new series of his chat show, with an out-of-this-world guest. See highlights. 11.45 ITV News; Weather 12.00am ITV Play: Make Your Play 3.50 Don’t Move, Improve 5.00 ITV Nightscreen
6.40 Channel 4 News Including sport and weather. 7.05 Unreported World Documentary series on topical global issues. President Evo Morales promised land reform to help Bolivia’s indigenous peoples, but the move has led to conflict with the land barons. 7.35 Houses Of Power Revealing documentary in which architecture expert Simon Thurley gains unique access to the world’s most iconic political buildings. 9.05 FILM: Road To Perdition (2002) Complex and violent Oscarwinning noir thriller set in 30s gangland Chicago as a hit man and his son go on the road seeking revenge after the murder of their family. 11.15 FILM: The Long Good Friday (1980) Starring Bob Hoskins, Helen Mirren, Eddie Constantine, Dave King, Brian Hall and Pierce Brosnan. Violent gangster thriller. A shady mob boss is trying to clinch a land deal connected with the pitch for the 1988 London Olympics, but his employees fall victim to a series of bombings and murders. 1.20am Ibiza Rocks With Sony Ericsson 1.55 FILM: Thursday (1998) 3.30 FILM: 20 Dates (1999) 4.55 The Dish 5.05 Loves Me, Loves Me Not 5.15 In Your Dreams
6.25 FILM: Grumpy Old Men (1993) Two neighbours who have been bitter rivals since a youthful feud over a woman renew their animosity when an attractive widow moves in across the street. 8.15 Five News And Sport The latest national and international headlines. 8.40 NCIS A one-million-dollar reward is posted by a wealthy family for the return of a missing person, but when a bullet is found, the case turns into a murder enquiry. 9.35 CSI:NY Stella and Flack investigate the death of a drag queen found in a hotel bathroom. Meanwhile, Danny and Mac look into the case of a high-powered extreme sports executive found dead in a salt truck. Lindsay leaves the team for a short break to testify in court for a case involving the murders she witnessed. 10.35 Law And Order Tough-nosed courtroom drama. When a jewellery store is robbed, the team immediately set about tracking down a civicminded witness, who then vanishes before the trial. 11.35 Grey’s Anatomy Above average medical drama. George begins to overstay his welcome. 12.35am Grey’s Anatomy Izzie grills George. 1.35 Quiz Call 5.35 Wildlife SOS
Sky Sports 2 6.00am Big Fight Countdown 6.30 LIVE Rugby Union: Super 14 (x2) 10.30 Big Fight Countdown 11.00 Max Power 12.00pm LIVE European Tour Golf 4.00 Big Fight Countdown 4.30 Live Super League: Millennium Magic 7.00 LIVE Super League: Millennium Magic 9.00 LIVE Spanish Football 11.00 Rugby Union 1.00am Spanish Football 3.00 Football First: Match Choice (x2) 5.30 British Formula Ford Championship
Sky Sports 3 6.00am Sports Unlimited 7.00 Sailing: America’s Cup 8.00 Max Power 9.00 Racing News 10.00 To be Announced 12.00pm Gillette World Sport 12.30 LIVE Sailing: America’s Cup 3.30 Rally World 4.00 Max Power 5.00 WWE Smackdown 7.00 WWE The Bottom Line 8.00 Golf Night 11.00 Extreme Championship Wrestling 12.00am WWE Smackdown 2.00 WWE The Bottom Line 3.00 Golf Night
Matt Chittock
extraterrestrial Sky One
BBC3
BBC4
ITV2
ITV3
E4
More4
Living
12.00pm Best Of Bones (x3) 3.00 Relic Hunter 4.00 The Dog Whisperer (x2) 5.00 Malcolm In The Middle (x4) 7.00 Futurama (x2) 8.00 Cold Case 9.00 Bones 10.00 24 11.00 The Beckhams Go To Hollywood 12.00am Rock Star Families 1.00 Naked In Blackpool 1.50 Red Light Girls 2.40 Buffy
7.00pm The Real Hustle (x2) 7.45 Doctor Who Confidential 8.25 Top Gear 9.30 FILM: Kill Bill Vol 1 (2003) 11.10 Little Britain 11.40 Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps (x2) 12.40am Ideal 1.10 Rob Brydon’s Annually Retentive 1.40 The Real Hustle 2.10 Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps (x2)
7.00pm Europe: A Natural History 7.50 The Lost World 9.05 The Worst Journey In The World. See highlights 10.05 Saki: Who Killed Mrs De Ropp? 11.05 The Double Life Of Saki 12.00am Europe: A Natural History 12.50 The Worst Journey In The World 1.50 Saki: Who Killed Mrs De Ropp? 2.50 The Double Life Of Saki
5.35pm Movies Now 5.45 Smallville 6.45 Spider-Man 3: UK Premiere Special 7.15 Nanny 911 8.15 Neighbourhoods From Hell 9.15 Greased Lightnin’ 10.10 Planet’s Funniest Animals 10.40 Greased Lightnin’: Results 11.10 FILM: Death Becomes Her (1992) 1.10am Grease Is The Word
12.25pm Rising Damp 12.55 Jeeves And Wooster 2.00 Pie In The Sky 3.05 Tom Brown’s Schooldays 5.05 Agatha Christie’s Poirot 7.10 Kavanagh QC 8.45 Inspector Morse 10.50 Taggart 1.00am The Vice 2.20 The Bill: ...and Nothing But The Truth 3.20 The Bill: Day Of Reckoning 4.20 Film File
2.30pm Hollyoaks Omnibus 5.00 Friends (x2) 6.00 The Simple Life: Interns 6.30 The Simple Life 6.55 Wife Swap 8.00 Friends (x2) 9.00 100 Greatest Funny Moments 1.10am Transmission With T-Mobile 2.15 Pussycat Dolls Present: The Search For The Next Pussycat Doll 3.05 Wife Swap
9.30am My Place In The Sun 10.00 Time Team (x3) 1.00pm Grand Designs Abroad 2.05 Grand Designs Revisited (x4) 6.25 Snowmail 6.30 FILM: The Raid (1954) 8.05 Britain’s Drowned World: Time Team Special 9.45 Mark Of Cain 11.35 The Closer 12.35am Grand Designs Abroad 1.35 Close
12.00pm Bewitched (x2) 1.00 The Bachelor USA 2.00 Will And Grace (x2) 3.00 America’s Next Top Model (x4) 7.00 Extreme: Skinny Celebrities 3 8.00 The X Files 9.00 Most Haunted Live: Pirates’ Curse 12.00am Most Haunted Live: Pirates’ Curse - Your Say 1.00 Outrageous Fortune
UK TV Gold
Paramount
Discovery
Sci Fi
12.00pm Ultimate Guide 1.00 The Secrets Of Megalightning 2.00 Killer Rain 3.00 Vesuvius: Deadly Fury 4.00 Great Quakes 5.00 Billion Dollar Disasters 6.00 Ultimate Guide 7.00 When Disaster Strikes 8.00 Deadliest Catch (x3) 11.00 The FBI Files (x2) 1.00am Behind Closed Doors
6.00am Robot Wars (x2) 8.00 Teleshopping 11.00 Dark Angel (x3) 2.05pm Psychic Detectives 2.35 FILM: Terror Peak (2003) 4.30 FILM: Jurassic Park (1993) Creature feature. 7.00 Who Wants To Be A Superhero? (x2) 9.00 Heroes (x6) 3.10am Medium 4.05 The Outer Limits (x2)
Sky Movies Indie
TCM
2.00pm Scrubs (x2) 3.00 Less Than Perfect (x2) 4.00 Scrubs (x2) 5.00 Less Than Perfect (x2) 6.00 Scrubs (x2) 7.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (x2) 8.00 King Of Queens (x2) 9.00 Park Life: South Park Top Ten 10.00 South Park (x5) 12.30am Naked And Funny 1.00 Sexy Cam 1.30 South Park (x2)
Sky Movies Classics
Film4
12.20pm My Hero (x2) 1.40 My Family (x2) 2.20 My Family 3.00 Doctor Who 4.00 Supervolcano 6.30 Some Mothers Do ’Ave ’Em 7.10 Porridge 7.50 Open All Hours 8.30 Jim’ll Fix It Strikes Again 9.00 Jonathan Creek 10.20 FILM: Big Daddy (1999) 12.10am I’m Alan Partridge 12.45 Have I Got 2001 For You
10.50am Fantastic Voyage (1966) 12.40pm Anzio (1968) 2.40 Rebel Without A Cause (1955) 4.40 A Farewell To Arms (1957) 7.15 Fantastic Voyage (1966) 9.00 Anzio (1968) 11.00 Rebel Without A Cause (1955) 12.55am The Lost Weekend (1945) 2.40 Saturday Night And Sunday Morning (1960)
12.00pm The Beat My Heart Skipped (2005) 2.00 The Ice Storm (1997) 4.00 Mad Hot Ballroom 5.50 Indie Close-Up 6.20 Galapagos 7.10 The Beat My Heart Skipped (2005) 9.00 The Ice Storm (1997) 10.55 Mad Hot Ballroom 12.50am Best (1999) 2.50 The Top 10 Show
1.00pm Phffft! (1954) 2.45 Heaven Can Wait (1943) Seemingly straightlaced melodrama with some hidden depths. 4.55 The Count Of Monte Cristo (1975) 6.55 Bogus (1996) 9.00 The Gift (2000) 11.10 Wrong Turn (2003) Genuinely jumpy freaks-inthe-woods horror. 12.45am Untold Scandal (2003)
1.10pm The Shop Around The Corner (1940) 3.00 Willy Wonka And The Chocolate Factory (1971) 4.50 Major Dundee (1965) 7.10 Murder By Death (1976) 9.00 Dirty Harry (1971) 10.55 Lady From Shanghai (1947) 12.45am Guns For San Sebastian (1968) 2.35 Teleshopping 2.55 The Champ (1979)
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sunday 6 Everybody Hates Chris Five, 6.45pm A real Sunday night treat, the growing pains of a teenage Chris Rock (as narrated by his elder self) deserves a wider audience. Tonight the romantically inexperienced Chris convinces the block that he’s dating Tasha, which doesn’t go down well with her grandmother. Meanwhile Julius has a sticky problem…
Matt And David’s Perfect Night In Channel 4, 9pm The first in a new mini-series giving stars the chance to choose their ideal night of television. Apparently when not helping best mate Robbie Williams through rehab Lucas and Walliams love to sit around watching old episodes of Grange Hill and The Young Ones. What no Little Britain?
Thoroughly Modern: The Typewriter BBC4, 7.30pm Despite appearing on every keyboard in the West (including the one I’m typing this on, gentle reader) QWERTY was actually created to slow typing rather than speed it up. The typewriter was credited with getting women into the workplace, but was it really such a great liberator?
terrestrial
sport
BBC1
BBC2
ITV1
Channel 4
Five
Sky Sports 1
6.00am Breakfast 7.35 Moto GP: Shanghai 9.00 Sunday AM 10.00 Heaven And Earth With Gloria Hunniford 11.00 Countryfile 12.00pm The Politics Show 1.00 ‘Allo ‘Allo! 1.35 Keeping Up Appearances 2.05 Murder, She Wrote 2.50 EastEnders 4.45 We Love The Sky At Night 5.15 Points Of View 5.30 Shaun The Sheep 5.40 Songs Of Praise
6.00am Teletubbies 6.30 Balamory 6.50 Step Inside 7.00 Batfink 7.10 Legend Of The Dragon 7.30 Smile 9.30 Match Of The Day 11.00 Something For The Weekend 12.30pm Inside Sport 1.15 Premiership Rugby 2.00 Badminton Horse Trials 3.00 World Championship Snooker 5.30 Big Cat Diary: Family Histories
6.00am GMTV 9.25 Art Attack 9.45 Mr Bean: The Animated Series 10.00 Feodor 10.10 Pocoyo 10.15 Jim Jam And Sunny (x2) 10.45 Curious George 11.00 Jim Jam And Sunny (x2) 11.30 The Sunday Edition With Andrew Rawnsley And Andrea Catherwood 12.30pm Meridian News And Weather 12.35 American Idol (x2) 2.40 FILM: Clockwise (1987) 4.25 FILM: Never Been Kissed (1999)
6.10am The Hoobs (x2) 7.00 Trans World Sport 7.55 Velux 5 Oceans Ultimate Solo Challenge 8.25 New Shoots: Films From Disabled Directors 8.55 Hollyoaks Omnibus 11.25 Shipwrecked 2007: The Hut Cam Diaries 12.00pm Musicool: The Live Show 1.40 Channel 4 Racing From Newmarket And Salisbury 4.00 Ugly Betty 5.00 Deal Or No Deal 5.45 Scrapheap Challenge
6.00am Spanish Football 8.00 Big Fight Special 10.00 Jimmy Hill’s Sunday Supplement 11.00 Goals On Sunday 12.30pm LIVE Football League 3.30 Ford Super Sunday 6.30 Super Sunday: The Last Word 8.00 LIVE Spanish Football 10.00 Football Welsh Cup Final 10.30 Ford Football Special 12.00am Super Sunday: The Last Word 12.30 Football League 1.30 Spanish Football 3.30 Football Welsh Cup Final 4.00 Football League 5.00 FIFA Futbol Mundial 5.30 Football - Welsh Cup Final
6.15 Castaway Danny Wallace gives the castaways another dilemma to face. 6.50 Antiques Roadshow Michael Aspel and the Roadshow experts visit Mount Stewart in County Down, Northern Ireland. 7.35 BBC News; Weather 7.50 Regional News And Weather 8.00 Victoria’s Empire Victoria Wood visits countries that used to be part of Queen Victoria’s British Empire. In Ghana, she visits Assin Manso where slaves were sold before being marched to Cape Coast Castle to be dispatched. 9.00 Dalziel And Pascoe When a spectacular TV mind-control experiment ends in cold-blooded murder, Dalziel and Pascoe find themselves drawn into the dark and dangerous world of the paranormal. 10.00 BBC News; Regional News; Weather 10.20 Match Of The Day 2 Adrian Chiles presents highlights from the Premiership match between Arsenal and Chelsea at the Emirates Stadium. 11.10 The Sky At Night . 11.40 FILM: Invasion Of The Body Snatchers (1978) 1.35am Sign Zone: Holby City Connie’s decision to operate despite being in the advanced stages of 2.35 Antiques Roadshow 3.25 New Year New You 3.55 Joins BBC News 24
6.00 Water Voles Documentary presenting an intimate portrait of one of Britain’s most charming wild animals, following a family of water voles living on a canal in Derbyshire though a typical year. 6.10 Natural World Nature documentary featuring the wildlife of Hawaii’s famous surf zone and the surfers and scientists who are fighting to protect it. 7.00 Cooking In The Danger Zone Food writer Stefan Gates embarks upon a culinary adventure around some of the most dangerous places in the world. 8.00 World Championship Snooker Hazel Irvine and Ray Stubbs introduce live coverage from the second session of this year’s final. 11.00 Graham Norton Uncut Graham Norton presents a show focusing on people, trends and the aspects of celebrity culture that interest him most, featuring trademark Norton comedy monologues, celebrity chat, eccentric stories and characters, and homegrown weirdness from the great British viewing public. 11.45 Roman’s Empire Comedy series about a dysfunctional family trying to face up to the stress of modern life. 12.15am Family Guy Animated comedy about family life. 1.00 FILM: Bubble Boy (2001)
6.05 10 Years Of Monkey Business Celebrating the last 10 years of the series Monkey Business, which has followed the day-to-day lives of apes and monkeys at one of the largest primate rescue centres in the world. This edition looks back at the Monkey Business babies. Chris Serle narrates. 6.30 Meridian News And Weather Latest regional news and weather. 6.45 ITV News; Weather The latest national and international news, plus national weather. 7.00 Emmerdale Viv’s devastated as Bob makes a momentous decision. 7.30 Coronation Street Leanne is met by a surprised customer. While attending the school play, Fiz sees a face from her past. 8.00 Heartbeat Bernie stands to inherit a fortune - and an old face returns from the dead. 9.00 Kingdom When a fisherman’s trawler is wrecked in an explosion his insurance company refuses to pay up, so he turns to Peter for help. 10.00 ITV News; Weather The latest national and international news, plus national weather. 10.15 This Is David Gest 11.00 Championship Special 12.00am Dunlop British Touring Cars Championship 12.30 The Moral Of The Story 1.00 ITV Play: Glitterball 4.05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 5.00 ITV Nightscreen
6.45 Shipwrecked 2007: Battle Of The Islands The Sharks are leading by three and the Tigers are desperate to catch up, but both teams’ efforts to impress new arrival Jonno are hampered by preparations for a pontoon raft race. 7.45 Channel 4 News Including sport and weather. 8.00 Wife Swap A pole-dancing single mother switches places with Donna, mother of teenage daughters Dallas, Swayze and Paris - with the usual chaotic results. 9.00 Matt And David’s Perfect Night In See highlights. 11.10 FILM: Stand By Me (1986) Bittersweet tale about a gang of four 12-year-old boys growing up in Oregon in the 1950s. stars River Phoenix and Jerry O’Connell. Adapted from The Body, a novella by Stephen King. 12.45am Ibiza Rocks With Sony Ericsson Boy Kill Boy perform their hits at the summer festival but it all goes horribly wrong when the PR girl is hospitalised. 1.20 Ibiza Rocks With Sony Ericsson 1.50 Get Your Act Together With Harvey Goldsmith 2.50 Empires Of Stone 3.50 Houses Of Power 5.20 Countdown
6.00am Save-Ums! 6.10 Fifi And The Flowertots 6.20 Franny’s Feet 6.35 Sailor Sid 6.40 Bird Bath 6.45 Franklin 7.10 Sheepdog Tales 7.25 Little Princess 7.40 Noddy 8.00 Harry And His Bucket Full Of Dinosaurs (x2) 8.30 Book Of Pooh 9.00 Ebb And Flo 9.05 Peppa Pig 9.15 Fifi And The Flowertots 9.30 Jane And The Dragon 10.00 Property Abroad 11.00 New Life In The Country 12.00pm House Doctor 12.50 News 12.55 FILM: Ten Wanted Men (1954) 2.20 FILM: To Walk With Lions (1999) 4.20 News 4.30 FILM: Calamity Jane (1953) 6.20 Everybody Hates Chris Chris’s election speech is stolen by Caruso. The local funeral director rents the upstairs apartment. Drew finds the money Rochelle lost. 6.45 Everybody Hates Chris See highlights. 7.10 Joey Joey takes matters into his own hands when an unruly child actor causes havoc on the set of his new movie. Meanwhile, Gina helps Alex with her love life. 7.35 Joey Joey gets carried away with the perks of starring in an action movie and uses his stuntman to distract angry men while he romances their girlfriends. 8.00 Grey’s Anatomy The interns deal with a family involved in a car accident. 9.00 Grey’s Anatomy Finn gives a health update on Doc. 10.00 FILM: Hollow Man (2000) Scifi thriller about a group of scientists in a secret military research establishment who are working on invisibility. Stars the inimitable Kevin Bacon. 12.05am BriSCA Formula One Stock Car Racing 12.55 Major League Baseball 4.10 Major League Soccer 5.10 IndyCar
Sky Sports 2 6.00am Moto + 6.30 Sailing: America’s Cup 7.30 Football First: Match Choice (x2) 10.00 UEFA Champions League Weekly 10.30 Big Fight Special 12.30pm LIVE Sailing: America’s Cup 3.30 LIVE Super League: Millennium Magic 6.00 LIVE Super League: Millennium Magic 8.00 Golf Night 11.00 Sailing: America’s Cup 12.00am Golf Night 3.00 Sailing: America’s Cup 4.00 Big Fight Special
Sky Sports 3 6.00am Rugby Union 8.00 WWE Afterburn 9.00 WWE Heat 10.00 Gillette World Sport 10.30 LIVE Cricket: Friends Provident Trophy (x2) 6.30pm Sky Sports Classics 7.00 Big Fight Special 9.00 Sailing: America’s Cup 10.00 WWE Afterburn 11.00 WWE Heat 12.00am US Superbikes 2.00 Cricket: Friends Provident Trophy 3.30 US Superbikes 5.30 Rally World
Matt Chittock
extraterrestrial Sky One
BBC3
BBC4
ITV2
ITV3
E4
More4
Living
9.30am Crash Test Dummies 10.00 Buffy The Vampire Slayer 11.00 WWE Experience 12.00pm Robot Wars: The Sixth Wars 1.00 Star Trek: The Next Generation (x2) 3.00 Relic Hunter 4.00 Project Runway 5.00 The Simpsons (x6) 8.00 Dream Team 9.00 24 10.00 Lost 11.00 Rescue Me 12.00am The Dresden Files
7.00pm Castaway Exposed 7.30 Dog Borstal Unleashed 8.00 Doctor Who 8.45 Doctor Who Confidential 9.00 Bashing Booze Birds 10.00 How Young Can I Get? 10.55 Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps (x2) 11.55 Booze Bird: Mischief 12.55am The Panic Room 1.50 Two Pints Of Lager (x2)
7.00pm Never Mind The Full Stops 7.30 Thoroughly Modern. See highlights 8.00 Legends: Edith Piaf – Singing Her Life 9.00 How The Edwardians Spoke 10.00 FILM: A Night To Remember (1958) 12.00am Holmfirth Hollywood 1.00 The Edwardians In Colour: The Wonderful World Of Albert Kahn
9.45am Vernon Kay’s Gameshow Marathon 10.50 Emmerdale Omnibus 1.30pm FILM: Death Becomes Her (1992) 3.30 Coronation Street Omnibus 5.55 Vernon Kay’s Gameshow Marathon 7.00 American Idol (x2) 9.00 Supernatural 10.00 FILM: Cliffhanger (1993) 12.10am Coronation Street
11.45am Foyle’s War 1.50pm Inspector Morse 4.00 Dunlop MSA British Touring Car Championship 5.30 Rising Damp 6.00 Robin Of Sherwood 7.05 The Magnificent Seven 8.00 Queen Live In Rio 9.20 The Odyssey 11.20 The Big Easy 12.15am The Magnificent Seven 1.10 The Odyssey
2.05pm Popworld 2.55 Shipwrecked 2007: Battle Of The Islands 4.00 Friends (x2) 5.00 One Tree Hill 6.00 What About Brian 6.55 Friends (x2) 8.00 Ugly Betty 9.00 Wife Swap: The Aftermath 9.30 ER 10.30 Desperate Housewives 11.30 Skins 12.30am One Tree Hill 1.25 Porn: A Family Business (x2)
9.00am Codex 10.00 Scrapheap Challenge (x5) 3.15pm Time Team 4.20 FILM: Freedom Radio (1941) 6.05 Deal Or No Deal 6.55 The Worst Jobs In History 8.00 The West Wing 9.00 Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares 10.00 Cutting Edge: Blind Young Things 11.05 Father Ted (x2) 12.05am Sex In The 90s
1.00pm The Bachelor USA 2.00 Wild Weddings 2 3.00 FILM: Charlie’s Angels (2000) 5.00 Extreme: Skinny Celebrities 3 6.00 Top Chef 7.00 Exposed: Victoria Beckham 8.00 Extreme Makeover 9.00 Most Haunted Live: Pirates’ Curse 12.00am Most Haunted Live: Pirates’ Curse - Your Say
UK TV Gold
Paramount
Discovery
Sci Fi
3.00pm Mount St Helens: Forecast For Disaster 4.00 Great Quakes 5.00 Inside Avalanches 6.00 Ultimate Guide 7.00 Asian Earthquake: The Science Of Tsunamis 8.00 The Perfect Disaster: Super Tornado 9.00 Deadliest Catch 10.00 Born Survivor: Bear Grylls 11.00 Decoding Disaster 12.00am My Shocking Story
6.00am Robot Wars (x2) Robotic scrapping. 8.00 Teleshopping 11.00 A Town Called Eureka (x4) 3.10pm FILM: Thank Heaven (2001) 4.35 Psychic Detectives 5.00 Who Wants To Be A Superhero? (x4) 9.00 Heroes (x6) 3.00 Medium 4.00 The Outer Limits (x2) Spooky sci-fi series.
Sky Movies Indie
TCM
3.00pm Less Than Perfect (x2) 4.00 Two And A Half Men (x2) 5.00 Less Than Perfect (x2) 6.00 Two And A Half Men (x2) 7.00 Less Than Perfect (x2) 8.00 Two And A Half Men (x2) 9.00 South Park (x5) 11.30 Park Life: South Park Top Ten 12.30am Edinburgh And Beyond 1.30 Two And A Half Men (x5)
Sky Movies Classics
Film4
1.00pm Pride And Prejudice (x3) 4.00 Porridge 4.40 Open All Hours 5.20 Jim’ll Fix It Strikes Again (x2) 6.20 One Foot In The Grave 7.00 Dalziel And Pascoe 9.00 The Vicar Of Dibley 9.40 Only Fools And Horses 11.00 Men Behaving Badly 11.40 Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps 12.20am Dalziel And Pascoe
3.00pm Hell In The Pacific (1968) 4.45 Chaplin Today: The Great Dictator 5.20 Giant (1956) 8.40 The Top 10 Show 9.00 Gunfight At The OK Corral (1957) 11.05 The Loneliness Of The Long Distance Runner (1962) 12.50am Evil Of Frankenstein (1964) 2.20 Limelight (1952)
2.25pm Stolen Kisses (1968) 4.00 The Hudsucker Proxy (1994) 5.55 To be Announced 6.25 Into The Deep (1994) 7.15 The Consequences Of Love (2004) 9.00 Two Days In The Valley (1996) 10.50 The Hudsucker Proxy (1994) 12.45am The Portrait Of A Lady (1996)
1.00pm The Eve Of Saint Mark (1944) 2.50 Heaven Can Wait (1978) 4.55 Storm Over The Nile (1955) 7.00 Silver Streak (1976) 9.00 Four Weddings And A Funeral (1994) Groundbreaking British comedy with Hugh Grant. 11.15 C.R.A.Z.Y. (2005) Seventiesset coming of age drama. 1.45am The River (1951)
7.15am The Fountainhead (1949) 9.10 Hotel Paradiso (1966) 11.00 Kiss Me Kate (1953) 1.00pm The Roaring Twenties (1939) 3.00 Please Don’t Eat The Daisies (1960) 5.05 The Rounders (1965) 6.40 Absence Of Malice (1981) 9.00 Magnum Force (1973) 11.15 I Confess (1953) 1.05am Silver River (1948)
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monday 7 New Tricks BBC1, 9pm This week, the old lags investigate the case of the last man to be hanged in Britain, and claims that he was the victim of police corruption. It all seems clear-cut on the surface, but as ever the past brings up surprises – including some uncomfortable truths about how police behaved in ‘the good old days’.
The History of Mr Polly ITV1, 9pm Rubber-faced comedian Lee Evans plays it (almost) straight for a worthy adaptation of HG Wells’ Edwardian social odyssey. Unable to find fulfilment as a shopkeeper, and after a suicide attempt goes spectacularly wrong he dumps his wife to see where life on the open road will take him.
Dog Borstal Unleashed BBC3, 8.30pm The channel where you’re never more than five minutes away from another episode of Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps updates viewers on the troublesome pups featured on the sister show. Tonight probation officer Mic Martin checks up on tearaway terriers Inji and Bertie. Is it back to borstal for the pups?
terrestrial
sport
BBC1
BBC2
ITV1
Channel 4
Five
Sky Sports 1
6.00am Breakfast 9.00 Animal Park 9.45 Homes Under The Hammer 10.45 To Buy Or Not To Buy 11.30 Bargain Hunt 12.15pm BBC News; Weather 12.35 Regional News And Weather 12.40 Match Of The Day Live. The Women’s FA Cup Final: Charlton Athletic v Arsenal Ladies 3.10 Keeping Up Appearances 3.40 FILM: Antz (1998) 5.00 Open All Hours 5.30 BBC News 5.50 Regional News And Weather
6.00am Fimbles 6.20 The Story Makers 6.35 Balamory 7.00 Arthur 7.15 ChuckleVision 7.30 Get 100 8.00 The Story Of Tracy Beaker 8.15 Krypto The Superdog 8.30 Jackanory Junior 8.40 Numberjacks 9.00 Boogie Beebies 9.15 Brum 9.25 Me Too! 9.45 Something Special 10.00 Postman Pat 10.15 The Roly Mo Show 10.30 Coast 10.45 FILM: Billy The Kid (1941) 12.15pm FILM: Quo Vadis? (1951) 3.00 World Championship Snooker 5.30 Flog It!
6.00am GMTV 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 10.30 This Morning 12.30pm Loose Women 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News; Weather 2.00 Midsomer Murders 3.00 Rosemary And Thyme 4.00 Agatha Christie’s Poirot
6.05am Making It 6.10 The Hoobs 6.35 The Hoobs 7.00 Freshly Squeezed 7.30 Everybody Loves Raymond 7.55 Just Shoot Me 8.25 Just Shoot Me 8.55 Frasier 9.20 Frasier 9.50 Will And Grace 10.15 Will And Grace 10.40 FILM: The Land That Time Forgot (1975) 12.20pm Life Begins Again 1.20 FILM: Battle Of The River Plate (1957) 3.30 Countdown 4.15 Deal Or No Deal 5.00 The New Paul O’Grady Show
6.00am The Save-Ums! 6.10 Fifi And The Flowertots 6.25 Franny’s Feet 6.35 Bird Bath 6.45 Hi-5 7.15 Roary The Racing Car 7.30 Little Princess 7.45 Make Way For Noddy 8.00 Say It With Noddy 8.05 Fifi And The Flowertots 8.20 Peppa Pig 8.25 Thomas & Friends 8.40 Old Bear Stories 8.50 Mio Mao 9.00 The Wright Stuff 10.30 Trisha Goddard 11.30 Five News 12.00pm FILM: The Great Race (1965) 2.55 Five News Update 3.00 FILM: Those Magnificent Men In Their Flying Machines (1965) 5.30 Five News 6.00 FILM: Agent Cody Banks (2002) Zany spy comedy in which a high school student moonlighting as a CIA agent must conquer his inability to talk to girls when he takes on a mission in which he must cosy up to a top scientist’s stunning daughter. Stars a very young Hilary Duff. 7.50 Five News National and international news. 8.00 Fifth Gear In this week’s programme, Vicki Butler-Henderson risks life and limb in the most dangerous car stunt of all: driving a car under a moving lorry without being decapitated. 9.00 Obedient Wives: Hidden Lives This programme meets the women who have decided that the recipe for marital bliss lies in obedience, submissiveness and domesticity. 10.00 Prison Break Acclaimed prison escape drama over from the US. In this episode, Michael, Sara and Lincoln ask an old friend for help, T-Bag and C-Note both run out of options, and Sucre’s quest is finally over. 11.00 FILM: Wolf (1994) Horrortinged black comedy starring Jack Nicholson. 1.20am NASCAR Nextel Cup 2.05 USPGA Golf 2.50 NHL Ice Hockey 5.10 French Football - Le Championnat
6.00am Spanish Football 8.00 Football: Welsh Cup Final 8.30 Ford Football Special 10.00 Super Sunday: The Last Word 10.30 LIVE Cricket: Friends Provident Trophy 4.30pm LIVE Conference Football 7.30 LIVE Ford Monday Night Football 10.15 Football League Review 12.15am Conference Football 1.45 Ford Monday Night Football 3.15 Soccer AM: The Best Bits 4.15 Conference Football
6.00 Victoria’s Empire Victoria Wood visits countries that used to be part of Queen Victoria’s British Empire. 6.30 South East Today; Weather Regional news magazine. 7.00 Play It Again Bill Oddie learns to play the guitar. 8.00 EastEnders May becomes dangerous when her plans to foil Rob and Dawn’s relationship backfire. Stacey looks after a sick Bradley. 8.30 Panorama An investigation into the increasing separation and segregation between Muslim Asians and whites. Vivian White reports from a northern English town where the communities feel divided by skin colour, religion, culture, and language. 9.00 New Tricks See highlights. 10.00 BBC News; Regional News; Weather 10.35 Not Going Out Tim’s grandmother dies, bringing him and Kate closer together, much to Lee’s concern. 11.05 Inside Sport Gabby Logan presents a weekly sports show featuring interviews with some of the world’s biggest stars. 11.45 FILM: Godsend (2004) Cloning drama. 1.25am Sign Zone: Panorama 2.25 A Very English Village 3.25 It’s Not Easy Being Green 3.55 New Year New You
6.00 Eggheads 6.30 Great British Menu Fourteen of the nation’s top chefs compete to convince the French that we can match them in gastronomic prowess. Michael Caines faces Mark Hixs in this battle to represent the South West in the national finals. 7.00 The Trees That Made Britain Natural history series looking at the way English woods shaped history. 7.30 Johnny Kingdom: A Year On Exmoor Winter has arrived early and with it a chance to film wildlife in the snow, but Johnny’s plans are interrupted by a neighbour who brings him an injured buzzard to look after. 8.00 World Championship Snooker The snooker season reaches its climax as a possible 11 frames decide the 2007 World Championship. 11.00 Ruddy Hell! It’s Harry And Paul Nelson Mandela goes shoplifting in the so-so comedy sketch show. 11.30 FILM: Anywhere But Here (1999) Comedy drama about the relationship between a daughter who wants a normal life, and her mother, whose desire for excitement leads her to dump her boring husband and seek adventure. 1.15am Joins BBC News 24 2.00 Talk Portuguese 1-6 3.30 Brazil Inside Out
6.00 You’ve Been Framed! Awardwinning comedian Harry Hill narrates more home video howlers sent in by viewers. 6.25 Meridian Tonight Local news magazine. Including Meridian weather. 6.40 ITV Evening News; Weather The latest national and international news. 7.00 Emmerdale Terry threatens Hari when he discovers the truth behind the allegations and Kelly cracks as the judge delivers a verdict. 7.30 Coronation Street Leanne panics as she realises that Paul has the power to ruin her relationship with Liam. 8.00 Focus Regional current affairs series. 8.30 Coronation Street Paul tells Liam that Leanne is bad news and to get rid. 9.00 The History Of Mr Polly See highlights. 11.00 ITV News; Weather The latest national and international news, plus national weather. 11.15 FILM: Red Heat (1988) Action thriller in which a dedicated Soviet cop arrives in Chicago, where he reluctantly teams up with a foulmouthed American detective. 1.10am UEFA Champions League 1.40 ITV Play: Glitterball 4.00 The V Festival 2003 5.00 ITV Nightscreen
6.00 The Simpsons While serving his time in prison, Sideshow Bob speaks out about the evils of television and threatens to detonate a nuclear bomb unless all TV is completely abolished. 6.30 Hollyoaks Calvin is concerned about Sonny getting to school, but Louise has other things on her mind. Katy is determined to do what she wants, even if it means annoying Warren. Steph’s solicitor tells her that she must do some charity work if she wants her aunt’s money. 7.00 Channel 4 News Including sport and weather. 7.15 FILM: Cheaper By The Dozen (2003) Anarchic comedy. 9.00 Cutting Edge: Trapped By My Twin A look at the intense and complex relationship between identical twins. 10.00 ER Luka and Abby realise that keeping their wedding plans secret is an increasingly forlorn hope. 11.05 The Sopranos Tony leverages Johnny’s misfortune into a domestic upgrade. 12.10am Sex And The City Carrie begins to wonder if her relationship with Aidan is too perfect. 12.45 Sex And The City 1.20 Six Feet Under 2.20 Transmission With T-Mobile 3.20 FILM: Hallo Panda 3.50 Veronique 4.00 The Number Crew
Sky Sports 2 6.00am Aerobics: Oz Style 6.30 On The Edge 7.00 WWE The Bottom Line 8.00 Sailing: America’s Cup 9.00 US Superbikes Championship (x2) 11.00 Football: Welsh Cup Final 11.30 Soccer AM: The Best Bits 12.30pm Football League Review 2.30 Big Fight Special 4.30 LIVE Cricket: Friends Provident Trophy 6.30 Sky Sports Classics 7.00 LIVE Speedway: Elite League 9.00 British Superbikes 12.00am Speedway: Elite League 2.00 British Superbikes
Sky Sports 3 6.00am Gillette World Sport 6.30 Cricket: Friends Provident Trophy 8.00 Golf Night 11.00 Aerobics: Oz Style 11.30 Racing News 12.00pm US Superbikes 2.00 Golf Night 5.00 WWE Raw 7.00 NBA Basketball 9.00 Cricket: Friends Provident Trophy 10.30 Wild Spirits 11.00 WWE Late Night Afterburn 12.00am Extreme Championship Wrestling 1.00 WWE Heat 2.00 WWE Late Night Raw
Matt Chittock
extraterrestrial Sky One
BBC3
BBC4
ITV2
ITV3
E4
More4
Living
4.00pm Stargate SG-1 (x2) Sci-fi series.6.00 Stargate Atlantis 7.00 The Simpsons (x4) Animated anarchy with Homer and co 9.00 Project Runway 10.00 FILM: US Marshals (1998) 12.30am Law And Order. Drama. 1.30 Naked In Blackpool 2.25 Hex 3.20 Uncut! Reps In Ibiza (x2) 5.10 Star Trek: Voyager
7.00pm Castaway 7.30 Spendaholics 8.30 Dog Borstal Unleashed 9.00 Little Britain 9.30 Ideal 10.00 EastEnders 10.30 Rob Brydon’s Annually Retentive 11.00 Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps (x2) 12.00am American Dad (x2) 12.40 Rob Brydon’s Annually Retentive
7.00pm The Sky At Night 7.30 Conan Doyle For The Defence 8.30 The Phoenix And The Carpet 9.00 Music Hall Meltdown 10.30 Smiley’s People 11.25 The Sky At Night 11.55 Thoroughly Modern: The Typewriter 12.25am Music Hall Meltdown 1.55 Conan Doyle For The Defence 2.55 The Sky At Night
12.30pm Emmerdale (x2) 1.30 The Jeremy Kyle Show (x2) 3.45 FILM: Dennis (1993) 5.30 Airline USA 6.05 Judge Judy 7.00 Grease Is The Word 8.30 Grease Is The Word Results 9.00 FILM: Cliffhanger (1993) 11.10 Coronation Street (x2) 12.10am FILM: The Fast And The Furious (2001)
6.35pm Michael Gambon – Maigret And Me 6.40 Maigret 7.50 Michael Gambon – Maigret And Me 7.55 Maigret 9.00 Michael Gambon – Maigret And Me 9.05 Maigret 10.10 Michael Gambon – Maigret And Me 10.15 Maigret 11.20 Cracker 12.40am Bad Girls 1.45 The Bill 2.45 Brideshead Revisited
12.00pm Nothing But… Dodgy Hair 1.00 Natasha Bedingfield Wants To Have Your Babies 2.05 Switched 2.40 ER 3.30 The OC 4.30 Hollyoaks 5.00 Friends (x2) 5.55 Scrubs (x2) 7.00 Hollyoaks 7.30 The War At Home 8.00 Friends (x2) 9.00 FILM: The Wedding Planner (2001) 11.00 Skins 12.00am Scrubs (x2)
12.00pm A Place In The Sun 1.05 Deal Or No Deal 2.00 ER (x2) 4.00 FILM: The Fighting Kentuckian (1949) 5.50 3 Minute Wonder: Second Lives (x2) 6.00 3 Minute Wonder 6.05 Deal Or No Deal 7.00 Grand Designs 8.00 Relocation, Relocation 9.00 The World’s Greatest Actor 1.00am Countdown
12.55pm The Fix 1.00 Will And Grace (x2) 2.00 Bewitched (x2) 3.00 FILM: Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle (2003) 5.00 Charmed 6.00 America’s Next Top Model 7.00 The X Files 8.00 Top Chef 9.00 Most Haunted Live: Pirates’ Curse 12.00am Most Haunted Live: Pirates’ Curse – Your Say
UK TV Gold
Paramount
Discovery
Sci Fi
4.00pm Nigel Marven’s Great Rhino Adventure 5.00 Nigel Marven’s Ugly Animals 6.00 Bull Shark: World’s Deadliest Shark With Nigel Marven 7.00 Shark Chasers 8.00 Great White Shark: Uncaged 9.00 American Chopper 10.00 Born Survivor: Bear Grylls 11.00 Salvage Squad 12.00am The FBI Files
12.45pm FILM: Stargate (1994) 3.10 Who Wants To Be A Superhero? (x5) 9.00 Medium 10.00 Heroes 11.00 FILM: Stephen King’s Firestarter (1984) Creepy horror based on the bestselling Stephen King novel. 1.10am FILM: The Crawlers (1990) 3.00 ReGenesis 4.00 Profiler 5.00 The Lost World
Sky Movies Indie
TCM
12.00pm Two And A Half Men (x19) 9.30 Rules Of Engagement 10.05 FILM: Forrest Gump (1994) 12.50am The World Stands Up 1.20 Tommy Tiernan Live 3.00 Two And A Half Men (x2) 4.00 The World Stands Up 4.30 South Park 5.00 Sir Leslie Quint: A Life In Film (x2) 5.10 Two And A Half Men (x2)
Sky Movies Classics
Film4
1.00pm Pride And Prejudice (x3) 4.00 Some Mothers Do ‘Ave ‘Em 4.40 Porridge 5.20 Open All Hours 6.00 The Vicar Of Dibley 7.00 FILM: Carry On Follow That Camel (1967) 9.00 FILM: Erin Brockovich (2000) 11.40 Only Fools And Horses 12.45am One Foot In The Grave 1.25 Men Behaving Badly
2.10pm Chaplin Today: Monsieur Verdoux 2.45 Barefoot In The Park (1967) 4.45 Clambake (1967) 6.30 Classics Close-Up 7.00 Steptoe And Son (1972) 9.00 Once Upon A Time In The West (1968) 11.45 Barefoot In The Park (1967) 1.35am The Raven (1963) 3.05 Irma La Douce (1963)
12.00pm King Of The Hill (1993) 2.00 36 (2004) 4.00 AFI Sean Connery Tribute 5.55 Sci-Fi & Horror CloseUp 6.25 Hail Columbia! 7.15 King Of The Hill (1993) 9.00 36 (2004) 10.55 Bang (1994) 12.45am AFI Sean Connery Tribute 2.35 Hail Columbia! 3.30 Indie Close-Up
1.00pm Smoky (1946) 2.40 The Gift Horse (1952) 4.35 When Eight Bells Toll (1971) 6.30 The Man Who Would Be King (1975) Adventure. 9.00 Sleeping With The Enemy (1991) so-so thriller with Julia Roberts. 10.55 Antwone Fisher (2002) 1.15am Buffalo ’66 (1998) Breakthrough indie movie.
3.00pm Murder At The Gallop (1963) 4.30 Logan’s Run (1976) 6.55 The Goonies (1985) 9.00 Blazing Saddles (1974) 10.40 Buddy Buddy (1981) 12.25am The Best House In London (1968) 2.05 Teleshopping 2.25 The Golden Arrow (1936) 3.40 The Day They Robbed The Bank Of England (1960)