Latest 7: No. 874

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/latestbrighton @latestbrighton /latestbrighton

BRIGHTON FREE | 10 – 16 April 2018 | Issue 874

on

Channel 7 Channel 159

online at thelatest.co.uk

FABULOUS BACKSTRÖM BROTHERS Opera, clowning and more in Brighton Fringe AFROBASHMENT Lotto Boyzz bringing tunes to Concorde2

RELATIVE MAYHEM David Walliams’ Awful Auntie comes to Theatre Royal Brighton Page 7

Victoria Nangle interviews

DANIEL SLOSS

page 8

002_LS874_Wired Sx_Wired Sussex 3-13 06/04/2018 10:06 Page 1

Web Developer – Pixeldot (Brighton & Hove) Event Sales Executive – IMEX (Brighton & Hove) Business Development Manager – Zoonou (Eastbourne) Android Developer – InCrowd (Brighton & Hove) Ecommerce Manager – Templespa (Littlehampton) Account Executive – NetDimensions (Brighton & Hove) E-learning & Graphic Designer – WDR Ltd (Horsham) Project Coordinator Apprenticeship – Kineo (Brighton & Hove) Mid/Senior JavaScript Engineer – Simpplr (Brighton & Hove)

Freelance brand designer needed – to create logo & associated marketing design work for local company.

Freelance self-shooters needed – to assist in the delivery of multimedia content to support a campaign.

Freelance programmer required – to deliver 10 weeks of face to face Java training (Every Wed 9am - 12) for 15 Students.

VR Brighton Meetup #12: Immersive Storytelling – 5th April at The FuseBox, Brighton Wired Sussex Members' Spring Meetup – 17th April at Patterns, Brighton Digital Women Does Brighton SEO Breakfast – 27th April at The Breakfast Club, Brighton

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from the

Louis Michael

@latestvicky

EDITOR

LOUDMOUTH

Easter rising (still)

Crystal clear

E

S

aster holidays – aren’t they grand? As much as most of us may have closed down our Easter break with the last remnant of a crispy chocolate shell, families with school­aged children and school­employed adults (there’s loads of jobs you can do in a school, not just as a teacher – they’re a veritable wormery of employment opportunities!) are still on an Easter break. The shortest of the much­maligned school holidays.

I have the utmost respect for everyone working in schools – on all sides of the blackboard. With school days starting earlier than I ever remember them, kids going to after­school activities or being told to stick their noses into books and work for the next round of tests/exams, teachers marking and outlining lesson plans late into the night, paperwork for everything... it all feels a little bit Kafkaesque to suggest that these are either the ‘best days of your life’ or an easy life of a career with short days and long holidays. I know when school holidays are about to start, not because of any movie releases or adventure promotions, but because the teachers in my sphere are all on their last nerves and coming down with several viruses, their immune systems having been worn out several weeks prior.

But the stories. The fabulous stories. From a previously difficult child actually recommending a book their favourite teacher might like to read, to elaborate chases utilising every bit of niche school architecture know­how that would make Tom & Jerry proud.

Schools are vital with life, potential, ruckus, adventures, peril and so much more. I feel proud and privileged to know people working in all kinds of education establishments, fostering dreams and comradery – under­ resourced, under­supported, and underpaid. These are giants’ shoulders our future is standing on. Thank you.

Victoria Nangle editorial@thelatest.co.uk

L7

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@Louisxmichael

o who here likes crystals? Do you believe in them? Do you find solace in the myriad spiritual affinities and uses ascribed to these countless coloured rocks? Or do you think they're just another facet of new age spiritualism draining dry the money of those looking for some new quick fix? Either way, you have to admit that they're pretty to look at.

As I write this I’m sat at my desk where two chunks of amethyst sit beside a rose quartz and a citrine. Amethyst is for wisdom, rose quartz is for love, and citrine is for happiness; a little collection I put together to help me with the stress of uni work. So if you haven’t already guessed, I’m a believer. And in Brighton we’re not hard to find. Here in our hippy city we’re blessed with more than one crystal shop (which can’t be said for most other cities) and I’ve spent more than I might like to admit on amassing a collection of crystals that I’m rather proud of indeed. But sometimes I find myself wandering into the realms of the disbelievers.

Often I’ll pick one up at random and expect a wave of energy to surge through my body and instantly revitalise me, and when that doesn’t happen (not to say that it’s never happened) I have to confess that I am left a tad disappointed. But just as Christians don’t test their god, neither do I test my little helpers. Instead I restore my faith by reminding myself of all the fascinating research being done on crystals. Scientific fact dictates that every thing in existence emits a frequency, not the kind that we can hear but the kind we can feel. This research goes on to suggest that crystals are unique in that they emit special frequencies that resonate with our bodies and can be used for beneficial healing means. Isn’t that such an exciting thought!?

Even if you are still skeptical, just knowing that there’s some small scientific validation, however early stages, means crystals are already head and shoulders above most of the other more sketchy items being flogged as cure­alls.

So treat yourself to a crystal! Carry it round in your pocket and give it and rub and see if it helps you through your day.

LATEST 7/HOMES

Managing Director Bill Smith Editor Victoria Nangle Business Director Angi Mariani Design/Production Kyle Moon Creative Director Andrew Kay Head of Sales & Marketing Lesley Lawrence

LATEST TV

LATEST MUSICBAR

CEO Bill Smith TV Team Jamie Walker, Leon Gerigk, Matthew Enderby, Jodie Allan TV Academy Tracey Davidson TV Scheduling Dan Roberts

Ali Cluney­Hickford Jeff Hemmings Charly Stringer

LATEST HOMES, 14-17 MANCHESTER STREET, BRIGHTON, BN2 1TF Editorial: editorial@thelatest.co.uk

Advertising: lesley@thelatest.co.uk

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THE

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HOT LIST

Chaula’s, Lewes

Chaula’s is renowned for its signature dishes, distinctive décor and friendly staff. All meals are made fresh to order and every curry has its own distinctively flavoured sauce. There is also a wide variety of vegetarian and vegan, as well as gluten and wheat­free dishes.

Buffet available 12pm–3pm, Monday to Saturday.

Lewes, BN7 2LP, 01273 476707 www.chaulas.co.uk

The Restaurant at Drakes, Brighton

The exceptional standards at The Restaurant at Drakes has again won them the top score in Brighton in The Good Food Guide ‘18.

Known for their imaginative, well executed dishes and created by an established team ensures every dining experience at Drakes is a memorable one.

The Private Dining Room adds intimacy and an extra special touch to any occasion and includes the service of a dedicated waiter.

3 course Lunch for the Price of 2 courses!

To redeem, quote The Latest when you book (max 6 people ­ valid Sun to Thurs)

The Restaurant at Drakes Hotel, 43­44 Marine Parade, Brighton, BN2 1PE 01273 696934, www.drakesofbrighton.com

Chaula’s, Brighton

Boho Gelato, Brighton

A second venue for this brilliant Indian restaurant is now open here in Brighton. Chaula and her team breathe fresh air into the idea of Indian food with authentic recipes served in stylish surroundings.

The cooking has an altogether healthier approach – but not at the cost of flavour. Thali Deals available 12pm­3pm; Meal Deal £9.99.

Brighton, BN1 1HT, 01273 771661, www.chaulas.co.uk

24 ever­changing Italian Ice Cream flavours ranging from Vanilla to Violet, Mango to Mojito and Apple to Avocado taken from an ever growing list of now over 400! Handmade on site daily at 6 Pool Valley Brighton – Off East Street near the Palace Pier and also available at their new shop in Ship Street. www.bohogelato.co.uk | 6 Pool Valley, Brighton New Shop – 31 Ship Street, Brighton | 01273 727205

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ANDREW KAY Dines Out Mumbo gumbo

F

ew will doubt that there is a truth in the fact that I love to dine out. I love restaurants, cafes, bars and… well put simply, I like my food. Given that my writing here appears almost every week of the year that means a lot of eating out and I try to keep it varied and I try to be fair. If you have not seen me review a place then it can be for one of two reasons; 1, I have not managed to go there yet or 2, I have been and found nothing good to report.

There was a time when I would lavish words on a venue’s interior.

But I soon realised that on the occasions that I described the wallpaper it was usually because there was little good to say about the food.

From time to time I have received letters from people who, having read my review, have gone along only to be disappointed.

There’s only one thing to say about this and that is simple; I reviewed my meal and not theirs. Personal taste plays a great part in this, what I like may not be what a reader likes. There’s nothing I can do about that, but trust me that I will always be as honest as possible. You will see that even in my rave reviews you might find that I found fault with something. ‘Picky’ you might say, but I do try to be fair.

“ Perch has a truly fantastic

atmosphere. The place buzzes with good humour ” So this week I want to be fair. About a year ago I wrote about Perch in Lancing and I loved it. It has to be one of the nicest beachfront places to eat for miles around with a wonderful view and a truly fantastic atmosphere, in part made by their open policy on dogs and kids. The place buzzes with good humour.

I returned with my good friend Mrs C, and in the car on the way she had already decided that she wanted to have their fish and chips. I have to say that I too was very tempted. On my last visit I had a kilo of mussels, still an option on the menu and from memory still the same price. I love mussels and balk when I am served a tiny saucer full of the sweet beasts. A kilo is about right, a marathon in food terms and one worth running.

But I digress, Mrs C was in fish­and­chips mood and her choice was justified by the excellent plate of food that came out – a large piece of fish in crisp and golden batter, a large portion of their oddly delicious scoop shaped chips and some mushy peas, as well as an enamel mug of tartare sauce. And on the side we both succumbed to the allure of their properly made onion rings – excellent.

Having checked online that they were open on a back holiday I had also perused the menu in depth. I so wish I hadn’t. I was drawn to a dish described as Vegas Gumbo.

I have been to Vegas and found nothing of real culinary importance save a good diner brekkie and a crab and lobster club sandwich. Beyond that it was all pretty grim – I should have been warned.

My gumbo arrived as described in a bowl, but beyond that the description was far from accurate. In fairness it tasted okay, it was edible yes – but it was uninspired.

Firstly it was a little too dry, more like a pilaff than a stew, and gumbo should have a soupiness surely, especially as it was served with some rather drab and very dry flatbread. But this is not my real gripe. The menu read that the dish included bacon bits, chicken and king prawns. Well I found the chicken, a few lean and meaty chunks, but as for the bacon – where there any, it was pretty well disguised in both a physical and flavour presence. And king prawns simply did not appear, okay there was a sprinkling of those cold and wet North Atlantic prawns that have no discernible flavour and had certainly not been present in the cooking of this dish. You can only imagine my disappointment and yes I did point this out to our charming waiter. In fact the service is impeccable.

I did love the salad and the dressing is deliciously sweet and sour.

So there you have it, a lovely time with a disappointing dish at the heart. I will return because I like the place a lot, and I hope that they either take this silly dish off the otherwise excellent menu or at least send it out with the promised ingredients.

28 Brighton Road, Lancing Beach BN15 8RA 01903 520307 lancingperch.com

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REVIEW Simon Munnery: Renegade Plumber

STAGE

Meet the Fabulous Backström Brothers at TOM

I

f, like me, you scour the local listings, the Fringe and the Festival brochures each year to see if Spymonkey are playing with a new show, or an old show for that matter, then so far this year has not put smiles on our faces. And there’s little doubt that for the majority Spymonkey will put huge smiles on our faces, whether it’s Greek gods or Shakespearean deaths, Spymonkey are side­splittingly funny.

The Fabulous Backström Brothers are in town for Brighton Fringe and here is why. Baritone Jouni Bäckström invited his brother Petri on a trip, with the goal of spending some quality time cruising across the states on Route 66 with him. What starts as a heartfelt plan to create some amazing memories and to foster some brotherly love quickly falls apart as Petri throws a spanner in the works.

“ Richard Wagner meets Johnny Cash in a ‘Ring of Fire’ ” So this is definitely exciting news! We are warned to prepare ourselves for the UK premiere of this Finnish smash hit, directed by Spymonkey's Toby Park and Aitor Basauri, yes the crazy perpetrators of modern clowning.

6 | LATEST 7

Instead of focusing on their trip, Pertri decides that this is the perfect opportunity to rehearse his big role as Siegfreied, and what’s worse he’s brought along his pianist Jukka Nykänen who is working on his magnum opus:

‘The God Particle’.

This is a hilarious and hard to pin down musical comedy that is a great choice for a day out, with a depth and breadth of appeal fit for the whole family. Think Richard Wagner meets Johnny Cash in a ‘Ring of Fire’.

The Bäckström Brothers are widely talented musicians with a background in opera, but they have always felt that the discipline has a tendency to lean quite far towards a certain kind of elitism. This show was originally envisioned as a counter­balance to the institutionalized, often ham­ strung, output often found in opera houses, and has blossomed into a passionate and powerful show that proudly stands behind its operatic roots, whilst not taking itself too seriously and aiming its sights at more of a comedy cross­over audience.

The Fabulous Bäckström Brothers 31 May ­ 2 Jun, 7pm 2 Jun, 2pm 01273 201 801, theoldmarket.com

M

any people would think that a comedy show revolving around a haphazard explanation of the invention of a heating system for a tent would be boring. And in the hands of many, they’d be right.

But somehow, Munnery makes it work in the most endearing and effortless way.

Sure, the show is totally shambolic, seemingly put together without much care or endeavour. I experienced frustration, bafflement, tedium. But I also experienced the timeless tingle that this seasoned pro can deliver with the most delicate and subtle of punchlines, and that will always make it worthwhile.

The Old Market, 31 March 2018 ★★★★★ Adam Lindsay

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10 THINGS YOU DIDN’T KNOW ABOUT DAVID WALLIAMS! A sneak peek at the authors’ secrets – from villains to tiddlywinks.

D

avid Walliams has been entertaining us for the past two decades. He’s made us laugh in Little Britain, outrageously taunts Simon Cowell on Britain’s Got Talent, and is acknowledged as the natural heir to Roald Dahl when it comes to writing for children. As the stage version of his best selling book Awful Auntie heads to Theatre Royal Brighton, we reveal ten things about David you do not know.

• He won’t be appearing on Strictly Come Dancing. “I can’t dance at all, as you might have seen in the TV adaptation of Gangsta Granny when I tried to dance with Miranda Hart. So I would say my chances are less than zero.”

“ Awful Auntie was inspired by a classic Stanley Kubrick film ” • Often compared to Roald Dahl, his favourite Dahl book is The Twits. “It’s utterly hilarious and I love that it is a children’s book with no child characters.”

• He has a recipe for his children’s books. “I think a good children’s book should be funny and exciting, and (with) a message that makes you think about it long after you have finished reading it.”

• He loves seeing his books’ characters on stage. “You feel like a magician when, as an author, you see your book come to life. It’s a real thrill to hear audiences laughing, one that never leaves

you even though I have been making comedy shows of my own for many years.”

• His book Awful Auntie was inspired by a classic Stanley Kubrick film. “I am obsessed with the film The Shining. I wanted to create a horror story where a child was trapped in a house with a dangerous relative, cut off from the outside world.”

• He collects autographs from the famous people he meets.

“I’m not shy about this. If I see someone I really admire I’m really happy to get their autograph. I get people to sign books all the time.”

• He likes writing about the bad guys. “Villains are always so much more fun than heroes. I wanted Aunt Alberta to be funny as much as scary.”

• He has good tips about how to play Tiddlywinks which features in Awful Auntie. “The great thing about Tiddlywinks is the name.

It’s the best named game out there. I haven’t played it for years but I think speed is the key. Or feel free to cheat.”

• He understands his audience. “Children love to be scared but it can't be too horrifying. Children love to laugh but it can't be too rude. You always have to be the right side of the line.”

• He has one unfulfilled ambition. “I would like to meet and hopefully marry Rihanna.”

The stage version of David Walliams’ Awful Auntie from the award­winning Birmingham Stage Company can be seen at Theatre Royal Brighton Wednesday 6 – Saturday 9 June.

0844 871 7650*, atgtickets.com/brighton* *Booking fees apply. Calls cost up to 7p per minute, plus your phone company’s access charge

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DANIEL SLOSS Hitting bigger and harder than ever with spots on Conan, supporting Dave Chapelle, and in the middle of an international tour, Scottish comedian Daniel Sloss spoke with Victoria Nangle.

Hi Daniel, how are you today?

I’m very well, thank you.

How are you finding it Stateside?

It’s great. I’m in Denver, Colorado, where marijuana and all of his mates are legal.

You can just walk into a store, like an adult, and buy drugs.

It’s the future. There’s no crime.

starts an hour long when I premiere it at the Edinburgh Fringe and then as I tour it around the UK and Europe in the autumn, I tend to find new avenues to develop with some of the ideas, so it expands to around 90 minutes. Then for my London and New York

his performance. It was two shows, so I got to watch how he changed his style, jokes, delivery between the two and it was fascinating to watch.

Just a real master at work.

you have no need for rest or a personal life?

Exactly the same as the past eight years. That or get on Taskmaster. I ****ing love that show.

You've also appeared on Conan an impressive eight

I enjoyed watching you on the Comedy Central week of 'Comedy Roast Battles'. The format is well established across the Atlantic but is newer in the UK. Why do you think Brits have been more reluctant to embrace it?

Because Brits are too mean anyway. All British humour is making fun of each other and ourselves, we’re self deprecating. In America it’s like a novelty to insult someone. As a Scottish person with a Scottish family and British mates, every day of my ****ing life is a Roast Battle.

“ You can just walk into a store, like an adult, and buy drugs. It’s the future ”

You've been touring this show a long while – and all over the globe. Do you have to be brutal with your material to make sure it's understood by an international audience?

Nah, my material isn’t topical or political or anything. It’s about me and how much of a **** I am, and fortunately, I’m a **** no matter where I go.

So the material is pretty universal.

seasons as well as for the Australian festivals I have to pare it back to 75 minutes so it's usually a pretty tight show ­ I only get back from touring Oz at the start of May so that's what I'll be doing in Brighton.

It's called NOW – with the tour starting last September, how current and 'now' is it by the time you get to Brighton in May? It’s still about me, and I’ve never not been current. It

You recently supported Dave Chapelle in San Francisco – what did you take away most, from working with Chapelle, and from playing to his audience?

I was genuinely blown away by

times – with more of a profile Stateside, would you ever be tempted to stay in the States, maybe following the US career plan into movies?

No. What are your plans for the next 12 months?

Write a new show, tour it around the world again, repeat.

And what would be your dream next 12 months professionally – presuming

What do you miss most about home when you're touring and travelling?

My friends and family.

Daniel Sloss: Now, Komedia, Friday 25 May, 6.30pm, £14/12

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B R I G H TO N L I G H T S W H AT TO D O I N T H E C I T Y

MUSIC, ENTERTAINMENT & COMEDY WITH VICTORIA NANGLE

1

At first glance the ascent of Birmingham’s Lotto Boyzz appears meteoric. In September 2016 the vocal duo Ash (20) and Lucas (21) released ‘Hitlist’; a summery fusion of sweet RnB harmonies, hot afrobeats rhythm and bass heavy dancehall swagger, ‘Hitlist’ effortlessly reflected the current fusion sound of Britain, establishing Lotto Boyzz as hotly tipped new artists in the UK’s exploding afrobashment scene.

Concorde2, Thursday 12 April, 7.30pm, £11.50 + booking fee

2

Gryphon are surely one of the most unique and interesting British progressive bands. The five albums they produced between 1973 and 1977 show their evolution from an all­acoustic medieval music quartet to a progressive pop band. With new songs as well as old being performed, their return to form is nothing short of astounding.

5

Another chance to see Jon Richardson’s show Old Man, after it’s success at the Brighton Dome last December prompted an extra date to the tour to be added. Just the thing, if you missed him in the Christmas melee. Richardson has long documented how he likes things “just so”, begging the question – how is he faring being a father and dad? Plus his thoughts on Brexit, Donald Trump and dishwasher­loading.

Brighton Dome, Friday 13 April, 8pm, £21.50

6

Tiff Stevenson brings her brand of smart and sharp stand­up to your attention in her latest show Bombshell.

Familiar to many already from her appearances on Mock The Week, 8 Out Of 10 Cats, and the BAFTA nominated People Just Do Nothing, showcasing Stevenson’s intelligent take on feminism, politics and more for the Beyoncé generation, mixing Sylvia Plath with pop culture.

Komedia, Saturday 14 April, 8pm, £15

@latestvicky

Ropetackle Centre, Friday 13 April, 8pm, £18/16

3

Circus Zyair is a colourful and action­packed hour and a half show with high energy acts from all over the world.

The 2018 tour is a dazzling combination of circus, music and laughter. Last day.

Brighton Racecourse, Tuesday 10 April, 3pm & 7pm, from £9

4

Based on the 1967 Mel Brooks film, this show tells the story of two theatre producers who scheme to get rich by overselling interests in a Broadway flop. Complications arise though when the show, offensive and outrageous, turns out to be a surprising success.

The Old Market, 10–14 April, 7.30pm (matinee Saturday 2.30pm), £14/10

To discover 20 more things to do this week, watch Brighton Lights show on Latest TV every Monday at 8.30pm.

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MOVIES ON LATEST TV All day & late night

Tuesday 10 April

Friday 13 April

6.00am Bulldog Breed 1960. Comedy. Director: Robert Asher. Stars Norman Wisdom, Edward Chapman, Terence Alexander & David Lodge. Norman Puckle joins the Navy under the same Admiral he refused to yield to in the harbour.

6.00am Freedom Radio 1940. War. Director: Anthony Asquith. Stars Clive Brook, Diana Wynyard & Raymond Huntley. A German doctor, disillusioned with Nazi propaganda, creates a secret radio-feed condemning the movement.

8.05 The Lost Moment 1947. Drama. A publisher insinuates himself into the mansion of the centenarian lover of a renowned but long-dead poet in order to find his lost love letters. Starring Robert Cummings & Susan Hayward.

9.50 The Gilded Cage 1955. Directed by John Gilling and starring Alex Nicol. Two brothers are embroiled in a racket to smuggle a valuable painting. When a murder is committed they must try and clear their names.

11.25 Esther Waters 1948. Drama. Director: Ian Dalrymple & Peter Proud. Stars Dirk Bogarde, Kathleen Ryan & Cyril Cusack & Ivor Barnard. Esther goes into service in Victorian England, only to be seduced by a footman.

3.10pm Silver Fleet 1943. War. Directors: Vernon Sewell & Gordon Wellesley. Stars Ralph Richardson, Googie Withers & Esmond Knight. The Gestapo, anxious for operational submarines, meet with the owner of a Dutch port.

11.00 House on Haunted Hill FILM OF THE DAY 1959. Horror. Directed by William Castle. Starring Vincent Price & Carol Ohmart. A millionaire invites five people to a 'haunted house' party, and whoever makes it through the night earns $10,000.

Wednesday 11 April

8.20 The Iron Petticoat 1956. War. Director: Ralph Thomas. Stars Katharine Hepburn, Bob Hope, James Robertson Justice & Robert Helpmann. A female pilot lands a Russian aircraft on German soil after flying off in a rage.

10.10 Blind Date 1959. Thriller. Directed by Joseph Losey. Starring Hardy KrĂźger & Micheline Presle. The Mistress of a struggling artist is killed and inspector Morgan (Stanley Baker) investigates a complex case.

12.00pm Dentist In The Chair FILM OF THE DAY 1960. Comedy. Stars Bob Monkhouse, Peggy Cummins, Kenneth Connor. A burglar breaks into the wrong shop and steals medical instruments instead of silver.

3.15 Tawny Pipit 1944. Drama. Directed by Bernard Miles and Charles Saunders.

Starring Bernard Miles, Rosamund John and Niall MacGinnis. A village bands together to save its wildlife from road development.

11.05 Our Relations 1936. Comedy. Director Harry Lachman. Stars Stan Laurel, Oliver Hardy, James Finlayson and Daphne Pollard. Stan and Ollie's longlost twins are in town. All four get involved with mistaken identity.

6.00am The Naked Truth 1957. Comedy. Director: Mario Zampi. Stars Terry-Thomas, Peter Sellers, Peggy Mount & Dennis Price. Nigel Dennis, a magazine publisher, blackmails high-profile politicians and celebrities.

12.00pm Second Woman 1950. Drama. James V Kern. Stars Betsy Drake, Robert Young, John Sutton & Florence Bates. An architect's fiancee is killed in a mysterious car accident on the night before their wedding.

12.15pm Bang! You're Dead 1954. Drama. Directed by Lance Comfort. Stars Jack Warner, Derek Farr, Veronica Hurst and Michael Medwin. A tragic accident leads to man being wrongly accused of murder.

2.05 They Who Dare 1954. War Drama. Directed by Lewis Milestone. Stars Dirk Bogarde & Denholm Elliott. In Greece during the war, British commanders and patriots are ordered to destroy two strategic German airfields.

FILM OF THE DAY 3.00 Vicious Circle 1957. Thriller. Director: Gerald Thomas. Stars John Mills, Wilfrid Hyde-White, Lionel Jeffries & Noelle Middleton. Howard finds himself in a predicament after he finds an actress murdered in his flat.

4.25 Waterloo Road FILM OF THE DAY 1944. Drama. Director: Sidney Gilliat. Stars Stewart Granger, John Mills, Alastair Sim & Joy Shelton. After Jim reports for military duty, he suspects that his bride has been seeing another man.

11.00 Sleeping Car To Trieste 1948. Drama. Director: John Paddy Carstairs. Stars Jean Kent, Bonar Colleano, Albert Lieven & David Tomlinson. Agents break into an embassy in Paris to steal a diary filled with political secrets.

8.00 Gasbags 1941. Comedy. Directed by Walter Forde and Marcel Varnel. Starring The Crazy Gang, Moore Marriott and Wally Patch. A mobile fish and chip shop is accidentally dragged to Nazi Germany.

9.50 Radio Cab Murder 1954. Crime drama directed by Vernon Sewell and filmed at Nettelfold. An ex-convict taxi driver poses as a crook to catch a bank robber. Starring Jimmy Hanley and Sam Kydd.

11.45 The Captive Heart 1946. War. Director: Basil Dearden. Stars Michael Redgrave, Jack Warner, Rachel Kempson & Mervyn Johns. A concentration-camp escapee assumes the identity of a dead British officer.

3.00pm Treasure Hunt FILM OF THE DAY 1952. Comedy. Director: John Paddy Carstairs. Stars Jimmy Edwards, Martita Hunt, Naunton Wayne & Athene Seyler. After reading Sir Roderick Lyall's will, the family learn they are short on money.

10.45 Vicious Circle 1957. Thriller. Director: Gerald Thomas. Stars John Mills, Wilfrid Hyde-White, Lionel Jeffries & Noelle Middleton. Howard finds himself in a predicament after he finds an actress murdered in his flat.

Dentist In The Chair

Saturday 14 April 6.00am Chance of a Lifetime 1950. Comedy. Director: Bernard Miles. Stars Basil Radford, Bernard Miles, Kenneth More, Patrick Troughton & Hattie Jacques. The staff of an engineering firm take over after going on strike.

8.20 Hoodlum 1951. Crime drama. Directed by Max Nosseck and starring Lawrence Tierney, Allene Roberts and Marjorie Riordan. Career criminal Vincent Lubeck betrays his family's trust.

9.35 Below Zero 1930. Comedy. Director: James Parrott. Stars Stan Laurel, Oliver Hardy & Charlie Hall. Laurel and Hardy play street musicians struggling to earn money on a cold winter day.

FILM OF THE DAY 12.00pm Ghost Ship 1953. Thriller. Directed by Vernon Sewell. Starring Hazel Court & Dermot Walsh. A young couple decide to buy a luxury steamboat for a romantic getaway and scoff at warnings that it's haunted.

1.35 The Long & the Short & the Tall 1961. War. Directed by Leslie Norman. Stars Richard Todd, Laurence Harvey & Richard Harris. Based on the Willis Hall play. A British patrol in Burma are determined to avenge British prisoners.

3.40 Between Heaven & Hell 1956. Drama. Director: Richard Fleischer. Stars Robert Wagner, Buddy Ebsen, Terry Moore & Broderick Crawford. The life of Sam Gifford, from a Southern landowner to his Military service during WWII.

Ghost Ship

6.05am Luck of The Navy 1938. Drama. Directed by Norman Lee. Stars Geoffrey Toone, Judy Kelly and Clifford Evans. With international relations strained and war a possibility, Commander Stanton is given a special mission.

9.35 Tit for Tat 1935. Comedy. Director: Charley Rogers. Stars Stan Laurel, Oliver Hardy, Mae Busch & Charlie Hall. Stan & Ollie set up an electrical repair store when they encounter a couple of old acquaintances.

10.40 The Golden Disc 1958. Pop drama starring Lee Patterson, Mary Steele, Terry Dene & Linda Gray. A young pop composer and singer opens a coffee bar.

They are joined by budding singer Terry Dene as himself.

6.00am Vendetta For The Saint 1969. Action. Director: Jim O'Connolly. Stars Roger Moore, Aimi MacDonald, Ian Hendry & Rosemary Dexter. Set in Naples, an elegant thief is outraged after witnessing the murder of a British banker.

Sunday 15 April

8.00 Fort Algiers 1953. Drama. Director: Lesley Selander. Stars Yvonne De Carlo, Carlos Thompson & Raymond Burr. In northwest Africa, a tribal leader tries to stir up a rebellion against the ruling powers.

8.15 Piccadilly Incident 1946. War. Director: Herbert Wilcox. Stars Anna Neagle, Michael Wilding, Coral Browne & Edward Rigby. A missing Wren returns from a desert isle and finds her husband has a new wife and son.

Thursday 12 April

House On Haunted Hill

10.20 Saturday Night, Sunday Morning 1960. Drama. Director: Karel Reisz. Stars Albert Finney, Rachel Roberts, Shirley Anne Field & Hylda Baker. In Nottingham, Arthur works in a mindless haze, but his love affairs cause him complications.

10.50 Damnation Alley 1977. Sci-Fi. Director Jack Smight. Stars Jan-Michael Vincent, George Peppard and Dominique Sanda. A group who survived World War 3 attempt to drive across the wasteland hoping to find survivors.

Monday 16 April 6.00am Arrowsmith 1931. Drama. Directed by John Ford and Starring Ronald Colman and Helen Hayes. A medical researcher is sent to a plague outbreak, where he has to decide priorities for the use of a vaccine.

8.05 Miracle In Soho 1957. Romance. Director: Julian Amyes. Starring John Gregson, Belinda Lee, Cyril Cusack and Peter Illing. Michael is an unhappy road worker, until he meets Julia, and 'the miracle' happens.

10.05 Landfall 1949. War. Director: Ken Annakin. Stars Michael Denison, Patricia Plunkett & Kathleen Harrison. At Coastal Command in Southern England, an RAF pilot is suspended after possibly sinking a British sub.

FILM OF THE DAY 11.50 Jassy 1947. Drama. Stars Margaret Lockwood, Patricia Roc & Dennis Price.

During the 17th century, Jassy is believed to be a witch after receiving visions of approaching disasters.

1.50pm Tiger By The Tail 1955. Drama. Directed by John Gilling. John Desmond, (Larry Parks) meets a mysterious woman (Lisa Daniely) who turns out to be part of a counterfeit ring and Desmond is caught up in the whole affair.

3.30 The Devil to Pay! 1931. Romance. Director: George Fitzmaurice. Stars Ronald Colman, Myrna Loy, Loretta Young & Frederick Kerr. The black sheep son of an English Lord falls in love with a Russian Nobleman's Fiance.

11.15 Woman in a Dressing Gown 1957. Anthony Quayle & Sylvia Syms star in this British drama about marital strife. Fed up with his wife Amy (Yvonne Mitchell)'s frumpy appearance, long-married Jim begins an affair.

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TV LISTINGS

on

Amazing Hotels: Life Beyond The Lobby BBC2, 11.15pm Time was it was Judith Chambers’ mahogany-tinged reports from beaches that prompted our holiday envy. These days our telly goes to a lot greater lengths to have us wish we were there. Chef Monica Galetti and critic Giles Coren visit Ashford Castle in Ireland and let our jaws drop in fantasy holiday play.

Class Of Mum And Dad Channel 4, 8pm Think school is simple? Think again, punks. For half a term parents will join their year six children in primary school, studying the curriculum under the same regime, wearing the same school uniforms, eating school dinners with them, taking PE – the works! Expect a little triggering of ‘school daze’.

Tuesday 10 6.00pm Latest News 6.30 The Vote Guests from the world of politics discuss local and national issues.

7.00 Football Weekly Darren 'The Hartman' Hart looks back at the week's football with the help of his studio guests.

7.30 Football Fanatics More nostalgic football stories looking at the absolute legends of the game.

8.00 Latest News 8.30 Live From the Roadee Live music from the Roadee - a mobile recording studio.

9.00 AK Soufflé Andrew Kay introduces special guests in this LGBT-focused chat show.

9.30 Queer Say Andrew Kay's look at LGBT news and media from around the world with the help of their studio guest.

10.00 Football Weekly Sonia Randev looks back at the week's football with the help of some special guests.

10.30 Football Fanatics More nostalgic football stories looking at the absolute legends of the game.

11.00 FILM: House on Haunted Hill (1959) Horror. Directed by William Castle. Starring Vincent Price & Carol Ohmart. A millionaire invites five people to a 'haunted house' party, and whoever makes it through the night earns $10,000.

12.35am FILM: Fear And Desire (1953)

BBC1

6.00pm BBC News At Six 6.30 South East Today 7.00 The One Show If it's got Britain talking then it will get talked about on The One Show. Presented by Matt Baker and Alex Jones.

7.30 EastEnders Mel does all she can to protect her son. Whitney is stunned when Woody makes a surprise return to the square. Stacey is unhappy to see Hayley is back.

7.57 BBC News And Regional News 8.00 Holby City Tate Gallery. A revelation about Gaskell forces Roxanna to choose where her loyalties lie. Still on probation, Ric risks his job to save a familiar face. A secretive young patient causes Fletch to question Abigail's priorities.

9.00 Come Home Drama. When Marie tells Greg she wants the children back, the two go head to head in court. An epic, divisive custody battle exposes old wounds and digs into the truth of their marriage.

10.00 BBC News At Ten 10.30 South East Today 10.45 This Country Family Loyalties.

Mockumentary exploring the lives of young people in modern rural Britain.

11.15 Generation Screwed? George Lamb travels across the UK meeting the young people whose voices have been left out of the mainstream media debate.

11.55 Commonwealth Games 2018 3.00am Commonwealth Games 2018

BBC2

6.00pm Eggheads Quiz show.

6.30 Today At The Games After backto-back Olympic gold medals over 800m in 2012 and 2016, South Africa's Caster Semenya is bidding for 1500m glory on the Gold Coast.

8.00 Great Indian Railway Journeys Lucknow to Kolkata. On an epic railway journey from Lucknow in Uttar Pradesh to Kolkata in West Bengal, Michael Portillo uses his Bradshaw's 1913 Handbook of Indian, Foreign and Colonial Travel, published when the British Raj was 55 years old, to chart a course through India's history from the days of The East India Company to the dawn of independence.

9.00 Hospital Documentary. 55-yearold Val is due to have groundbreaking reconstructive surgery on her jaw.

This surgery will transform Val's life but with the new NHS ruling in place, it cannot be deemed clinically urgent and should be cancelled. Surgeon Dilip is determined to do everything he can to fight for Val's operation.

10.00 Cunk On Britain The Empire Strikes Back. Mockumentary series from Charlie Brooker. In this second episode, Philomena's odyssey takes her from King Henry the Eighth to Lord Horatio Nelson.

10.30 Newsnight In-depth investigation and analysis of the stories behind the day's headlines.

11.15 Amazing Hotels: Life Beyond The Lobby See highlights.

12.15am The Super League Show

AK SOUFFLE Andrew Kay

@latestandrew

A heartbeat away

I

t emerged as a dark rumour, rapidly became a reality that was followed by messages of doom carved in funereal stone. AIDS was here and with it came despair, panic, mistrust… an era of fear and oppression. The good news of Wolfenden and a newfound emancipation was swept away by a deadly virus that no one knew anything about.

The new film from France, 120 BPM, charts the emergence of Act Up Paris, the fearless activist campaigning group in a time when fear was king, charts that moment in time when there seemed little hope and what little hope there was seemed to be being withheld by the pharmaceutical giants of the time.

“ What I had seen left me bereft of

any ability to do much more than sit and absorb ” The truth was that people were dying, men and women, gay and straight – and dying in misery and pain. It all seems a distant memory now, with the advent of drug regimes that work in giving those with HIV healthy lives. What was a killer is now a manageable menace and progress is still being made.

I sat through the film in silence. It is relentlessly distressing, there is no light­hearted humour, none of the cinematic tricks that we

ITV1

6.00pm ITV News Meridian 6.25 Party Election Broadcast 6.30 ITV Evening News 7.00 Emmerdale Charity confronts her past, Jimmy's lies catch up with him, and Laurel faces the consequences.

8.00 This Time Next Year Davina meets new parents who want to transform the life of their profoundly deaf baby girl, a military couple who share their desire to start a family, a mother and daughter hoping to lose 15 stone between them, and an oncology student who has her sights set on becoming Miss England.

9.00 Last Laugh in Vegas Documentary series. The showbiz entertainers begin rehearsals for the biggest performance of their lives, but impressing their American producer Frank Marino is proving to be tough.

Anita Harris, Tommy Cannon, Jess Conrad and Mick Miller take time out of rehearsals to head out into the desert to meet a Native American medicine man.

10.00 ITV News at Ten 10.30 ITV News Meridian 10.45 The Cruise: Sailing the Caribbean The Royal Princess, one of the world's largest and most luxurious cruise ships, is on a five-month season island hopping around the Caribbean from Grenada and the Bahamas to Antigua and Bonaire.

11.15 Heroes and Villains: Caught on Camera 12.10am The Durrells

Channel 4

6.00pm The Simpsons 6.30 Hollyoaks Ste faces a very hard decision, but how far will he go to protect his family?

7.00 Channel 4 News 8.00 Class Of Mum And Dad See highlights.

9.00 Seven Year Switch In the final programme, all four couples return home, where they must try to put everything they've learned from the switch experiment into practice in their day-to-day lives. Each couple will then meet therapist Lee and relationship coach Vena to answer one, final, life-changing question - do they want to stay together or part ways for good?

10.00 Gogglebox Another chance to see Friday's new episode as the biggest and best TV moments of the week get a grilling from Britain's sharpest armchair critics.

11.05 One Born Every Minute The award-winning documentary series highlights the extraordinary highs and lows at Birmingham Women's Hospital maternity ward as parents' lives change forever when they welcome new babies into the world.

After seven years trying and two failed rounds of IVF, 33-year-old Jo and 47-year-old Pat thought they would never have children, until a visit to a clairvoyant offered them hope.

12.05am Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares USA

Victoria Nangle

saw in the film Pride, no laughter – or at least no laughter from the audience – even when we saw those few moments of love and joy that the film clearly has.

And this is a film that straddles two ideas, the horror of those early days and the strength of love that overcame that horror, even in death.

I watched in silence knowing that after the screening there was to be a Q&A session with three excellent speakers. I met them before the screening and talked with them about what the film stood for and what it might achieve. But at the end of the film, as the credits rolled in the semi gloom, I scuttled furtively away.

Much as I wanted to listen to them talk, what I had seen left me bereft of any ability to do much more that quietly absorb.

120 beats per minute, the heart rate that was so much a part of that exuberant, hedonistic dance scene, the rhythm of the soundtrack to those defining years, stopped so many dead. A heartbeat that was so readily stopped by the onslaught of a disease that know no boundaries, showed no respect or mercy.

What’s changed? So much, new drugs, drugs that work, lives once one hold renewed – for some. But for how long? The world changes fast. Across the Atlantic a new right wing regime jeopardises gay rights, we are pulling out of a Europe where queer rights have made huge leaps and a broader world where in some countries AIDS is still a major issue and gay rights non­existant.

120 BPM is a flagship of how far we have come but also a warning that there is still no room for complacency.

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TV LISTINGS The City And The City Friday, BBC2, 9pm You’ve just gotta like anything with David Morrissey in it. Add that he’s in a new genre-busting thriller adapted by Tony Pope (The Red Riding Trilogy) from one of Britain’s foremost fantasy writers (China Miéville) and we’re busting out the iPlayer for last week’s episode too. Class.

Indian Summer School Thursday, Channel 4, 9pm It’s the last episode of this educational culture shock and after three months the boys are missing home. Ethan shakes things up in the Indian school when he writes an article for the school paper about being it’s first ‘out’ schoolboy. And Jack goes on a trek.

Thursday 12

Wednesday 11 6.00pm Latest News 6.30 Democracy Now! 7.00 Extra Time An interesting, insightful and humourous look at the latest news in the world of football.

7.30 Football Heroes A chance to relive the careers of some of the biggest icons of football from the last 15 years.

8.00 Latest News 8.30 Democracy Now! Politics and discussion from the USA. 9.00 The Rosies The Rosies interview (very) young entrepreneur Maida, to talk about what is it to have your own cupcake business while being a teenager.

9.30 Queer Say Andrew Kay's look at LGBT news and media from around the world with the help of their studio guest.

10.00 Extra Time An interesting, insightful and humourous look at the latest news in the world of football.

10.30 Football Heroes A chance to relive the careers of some of the biggest icons of football from the last 15 years.

11.00 FILM: Sleeping Car To Trieste (1948) 12.50am FILM: Damnation Alley (1977)

BBC1

6.00pm BBC News At Six 6.30 South East Today 7.00 The One Show If it's got Britain talking then it will get talked about on The One Show.

7.57 BBC News And Regional News 8.00 MasterChef: The Finals Finals Week continues, and just four cooks remain. Now they travel to Lima, capital of Peru, where they face three challenges. The first takes place in Lima's major fish market Chorillos, where, in teams of two, they must recreate four popular Peruvian dishes to serve to a group of local fishermen.

9.00 DIY SOS: The Big Build Nick Knowles and the team issue a call to arms and recruit friends, family and local trades to help transform the homes of families across Britain.

10.00 BBC News At Ten 10.30 South East Today 10.45 A Question Of Sport Light-hearted sports quiz.

11.15 Annie: Out Of The Ashes Documentary.

12.00am Commonwealth Games 2018

BBC2

6.00pm Eggheads Quiz show.

6.30 Today At The Games Highlights from day seven of the 2018 Commonwealth Games from Australia presented

by Clare Balding and Gabby Logan.

8.00 The Secret Helpers Documentary series.

Lesley was married to Roy for 43 years and she was his main carer after he got sick.

9.00 The Assassination Of Gianni Versace American Crime Story Ascent. 1992.

Donatella's self-doubt hampers her in Milan, but Andrew's certainty that he deserves success sees him brag, bluff and beguile his way to a new life, targeting wealthy men in San Diego.

9.50 Live At The Apollo Stand-up comedy from the Hammersmith Apollo.

10.30 Newsnight Indepth investigation and analysis of the stories behind the day's headlines with Evan Davis.

11.15 Hospital Documentary.

12.15am The Queen: Her Commonwealth Story

ITV1

6.00pm ITV News Meridian 6.25 Party Election Broadcast 6.30 ITV Evening News 7.00 Emmerdale Vanessa takes matters into her own hands.

7.30 Coronation Street Eva struggles with the prospect of giving up her baby.

8.00 Britain's Brightest Family Two brilliantly bright families fight in the first semi-final for a place in the final of the knockout quiz.

8.30 Coronation Street Toyah encourages Eva to be honest with Aidan.

9.00 Benidorm Comedy.

Sammy cannot come down after his comeback performance, so he calls Monty in the small hours to tell him that he is ready for a night at Neptune's and is over 'the fear'.

10.00 ITV News at Ten 10.30 ITV News Meridian 10.45 UEFA Champions League Highlights Mark Pougatch presents highlights.

11.45 When Football Changed Forever 12.35am Jackpot247

Channel 4

6.00pm The Simpsons 6.30 Hollyoaks Leah is demanding answers, while Leela turns to Tegan for support.

7.00 Channel 4 News 8.00 The Supervet Teddy, a shih-tzu cross with severely deformed front legs, is brought in to see professor Noel Fitzpatrick.

9.00 One Born Every Minute The awardwinning documentary series highlights the extraordinary highs and lows at Birmingham Women's Hospital maternity ward as parents' lives change forever when they welcome new babies into the world.

10.00 First Dates The new series continues, but is love on the menu?

Recruitment consultant Lee, who's 32, spends most of his time procuring the perfect pint rather than the perfect partner.

11.05 Gogglebox The biggest and best TV moments of the week get a grilling from Britain's sharpest armchair critics.

12.05am Live From Abbey Road Classics

BBC1

6.00pm Doodlebugs 6.15 Ready Or Not Comedy entertainment show.

6.45 BBC News 6.55 South East Today 7.05 Pointless Celebrities A special edition of the general knowledge quiz.

7.55 Who Dares Wins Nick Knowles hosts the quiz in which two teams of strangers play against each other to complete a series of lists and win up to £100,000.

8.35 Casualty Hospital drama.

9.30 Mrs Brown’s Boys Popular comedy. Agnes Brown crashes the bachelorette party of Dermot's fiancee, Maria, then realizes that she is at the wrong place.

Maria's mother comes to dinner, and Agnes drinks too much.

10.00 BBC News 10.20 Match Of The Day Gary Lineker introduces highlights of the day's Premier League games.

11.45 Commonwealth Games 2018 3.30am Commonwealth Games 2018

6.00pm Latest News 6.30 The Vote The People's Republic of Brighton and Hove Takeover. An isle of sanity in a sea of blue.

7.00 TerraPura NonLeague Show All the latest non-league football news and action from the region.

8.00 Latest News 8.30 Digital Nation The best of Local TV from across the UK. 9.00 AK Souffle Andrew Kay introduces special guests in this LGBTfocused chat show.

9.30 AK Souffle Andrew Kay introduces special guests in this LGBTfocused chat show.

10.00 Under The Radar Birth Of Hip-Hop. Paul Mex and Jeff Hemmings host videos by Afrika Bambaataa, Man Parrish, Kurtis Blow, and Sugarhill Gang.

10.30 The Arun Valley Postcard Trail 10.45 FILM: Vicious Circle (1957) Thriller.

Stars John Mills, Wilfrid Hyde-White, Lionel Jeffries & Noelle Middleton.

12.25am FILM: The Cowboy & The Lady (1938) Drama.

BBC1

B

BBC1

B

6.00pm BBC News At Six 6.30 South East Today 7.00 The One Show 7.30 EastEnders Kat gives Hayley a harsh talking-to but gets more than she bargained for.

7.57 BBC News And Regional News 8.00 MasterChef: The Finals Restaurateur John Torode and fruit and veg man Gregg Wallace look for Britain's next masterchef.

9.00 Not Going Out Lollipop Man. Sitcom.

Lee and Lucy object to the school lollipop man handing out lollipops to the children.

9.30 Still Game Comedy series. Isa's pulse is set racing as a long-lost companion returns to Craiglang from Hollywood.

10.00 BBC News At Ten 10.30 South East Today 10.45 Question Time David Dimbleby presents topical debate from Liverpool.

11.45 Commonwealth Games 2018 3.30am Commonwealth Games 2018

6 s 6 G a p a 8 B s s t a C e p i f 9 R S m c g o 1 P G w p d t L 1 d a 1 S 1 S L

Sunday 15

Saturday 14 6.00pm Latest News 6.30 DJ Box Get to know the world of DJing and dance music.

7.00 Football Heroes A chance to relive the careers of some of the biggest icons of football from the last 15 years.

7.30 Football Heroes A chance to relive the careers of some of the biggest icons of football from the last 15 years.

8.00 Latest News 8.30 Adrenalize Highpowered thrills and spills from the world of extreme sports.

9.00 Queer Say Andrew Kay's look at LGBT news and media from around the world with the help of their studio guest.

9.30 Queer Say Andrew Kay's look at LGBT news and media from around the world with the help of their studio guest.

10.00 The Arun Valley Postcard Trail 10.15 Guy Lloyd's 2Minute Telly Show 10.20 FILM: Saturday Night, Sunday Morning (1960) Drama. Director: Karel Reisz. Stars Albert Finney, Rachel Roberts, Shirley Anne Field & Hylda Baker.

12.05am FILM: The Loneliness Of The Long Distance Runne (1962)

Lethal Weapon Friday, ITV1, 9pm The dream team are off in different directions this week, with Riggs heading up to the clink to visit his father-in-law in prison. A wander down memory lane reveals an old secret about his late wife – d’ya think he’ll like it? And Murtaugh is out to impress the captain, while Trish and Leo are on a murder case.

BBC2

5.30pm Living With The Brainy Bunch Two teenagers try to improve their poor grades by moving in with a star student in the new documentary Living with the Brainy Bunch.

6.30 Today At The Games Clare Balding and Gabby Logan round up the action.

8.00 The Forest Following three truckers as they track down, load and ferry timber to mills in the UK. 8.30 Dad’s Army Comedy.· During a nightly patrol in terrible weather the platoon runs out of rationed petrol for Jones's van, so they decide to spend the night in an at first sight abandoned house.

9.00 Gettys: The World’s Richest Art Dynasty 10.15 Commonwealth Games 2018 Clare Balding and Gabby Logan round up the action.

11.45 FILM: Swingers (1996) Wannabe actors become regulars in the stylish neo-lounge scene; Trent teaches his friend Mike the unwritten rules of the scene.

1.15am Civilisations

ITV1

4.35pm ITV Racing: The Grand National 6.15 ITV Evening News 6.25 ITV News Meridian 6.30 Ninja Warrior UK Action-packed game show.

7.30 Harry Hill's Alien Fun Capsule Helping Harry Hill fill the fun capsule to prevent an alien invasion in this episode are comedian Micky Flanagan, political journalist Robert Peston, Coronation Street actor Sally Dynevor, and broadcasting legend Anneka Rice.

8.00 Britain's Got Talent The nation's favourite TV talent show returns to our screens for a funfilled 12th series packed full of variety.

9.25 The Keith and Paddy Picture Show The comedy series in which Keith Lemon and Paddy McGuinness recreate an iconic Hollywood movie in half an hour - with the help of an all-star cast.

This edition presents their version of Grease.

9.55 ITV News 10.15 FILM: Legally Blonde (2001) Reese Witherspoon, Luke Wilson, Selma Blair.

Romantic comedy.

12.05am Marcella

Channel 4

5.35pm The Secret Life Of The Zoo Sumatran tiger mum Kirana faces losing her two sons, Topan and Jaya, who are fully grown and being moved to other zoos to start families of their own.

6.30 Channel 4 News 7.00 Coastal Railways With Julie Walters Julie travels from Cardigan Bay in Wales to Liverpool.

8.00 Britain’s Most Historic Towns In this unique take on British history, Professor Alice Roberts explores Britain's rich and varied past through the stories of individual towns and cities.

9.00 FILM: Thor (2015) Thor (Hemsworth), the Norse god of thunder, goes against his father Odin's counsel and deliberately provokes the realm of Asgard's enemies, the Frost Giants.

11.15 FILM: Big Game (2014) Samuel L Jackson and Onni Tommila star in an unrestrained actionthriller from Finnish writer-director Jalmari Helander.

12.55am Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmare’s USA

6.00pm Latest News 6.30 Family, Faith and Fun Sarah Hopwood presents the happiness debate.

7.00 British Wrestling Weekly All the latest happenings from the British Wrestling Coalition.

8.00 Latest News 8.30 Brighton Album Chart Show Anthea Clarke introduces February's top 10 based on physical album sales at Brighton's cult independent record store, Resident Music.

9.00 AK Souffle Andrew Kay introduces special guests in this LGBTfocused chat show.

9.30 AK Souffle Andrew Kay introduces special guests in this LGBTfocused chat show.

10.00 Under The Radar Birth Of Hip-Hop. 10.30 Deliver Us 2017.

Short Horror Drama.

10.50 FILM: Damnation Alley (1977) Sci-Fi. Stars Jan-Michael Vincent, George Peppard and Dominique Sanda. A group who survived World War 3 attempt to drive across the wasteland hoping to find survivors.

12.40am Port of New York

6.00pm The Big Painting Challenge Portraiture.

Mariella Frostrup and Reverend Richard Coles travel to the Cotswolds for the third episode of the amateur painting competition.

7.00 Countryfile Loch Ness. Sean Fletcher and Naomi Wilkinson are in the wilds around Cumbria.

8.00 Antiques Roadshow Treasures and historical delights uncovered at Black Country Living Museum.

9.00 Ordeal By Innocence See highlights.

10.00 BBC News The latest national and international news, with reports from BBC correspondents worldwide.

10.20 South East Today 10.30 Match Of The Day 2 Mark Chapman presents highlights of the day's two Premier League matches.

11.30 FILM: The Peacemaker (1997) A US Army colonel and a civilian woman supervising him must track down stolen Russian nuclear weapons before they're used by terrorists.

1.25am Weather

5 d a a o p n 6 G a u 8 W E a w c T m c s g t c 9 T u r 1 h 1 H w d l a c p m C S 1 H

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on Farmalam Sunday, BBC2, 10pm After success on demand on BBC3 this comedy sketch show makes its way to ‘Big Boy’ telly, shining a comedic light on everything from alien encounters to what happens when a man is left in a house on his own for ten minutes.

Bright new comedy voices.

Ordeal By Innocence Sunday, BBC1, 9pm It’s the final part of this gripping Agatha Christie whodunnit, with a star-studded cast and a smorgasbord of characters all unpleasant enough to sit comfortably behind bars without anyone being surprised. Jack died innocent, Calgary is on the case, and in the crossfires of the real killer.

The Island With Bear Grylls Monday, Channel 4, 9pm The two camps are still staying in their separate quarters, but hunger drives a change.

Barnes decides to risk strong currents with a journey to the next island to look for food, and a weak Mercedes shocks all by deciding to join him. Uh oh.

Friday 13 BBC2

6.00pm Eggheads Quiz show.

6.30 Today At The Games Clare Balding and Gabby Logan present the best of the action from day eight.

8.00 Living With The Brainy Bunch Two struggling 15-year-old students move in with two of the highest achievers in their year.

Can this change in home environment and parental influence improve their results and future?

9.00 Civilisations Radiance. Simon Schama starts his meditation on colour and civilisation with the great Gothic cathedrals of Amiens and Chartres.

10.00 MOTD: The Premier League Show Gabby Logan hosts the weekly magazine programme, featuring indepth interviews with the biggest Premier League stars.

10.30 Newsnight Indepth investigation and analysis of the stories.

11.15 Secret Agent Selection: WW2 12.15am Reggie Yates: Searching For Grenfell's Lost Lives

ITV1

6.00pm ITV News Meridian 6.25 Party Election Broadcast 6.30 ITV Evening News 7.00 Emmerdale Ross will not back down.

7.30 OAP Bootcamp Tonight Two fifths of the NHS budget is spent on the over 65s, with loneliness, lack of exercise, and bad diet being the big causes of poor health in pensioners. Could changing all that make a difference?

8.00 Emmerdale Rhona fears for her life.

8.30 The Cruise: Sailing the Caribbean Documentary series.

9.00 The Investigator: A British Crime Story Explosive documentary series. Former police detective Mark Williams-Thomas investigates the murders of Anna Kenny, Agnes Cooney and Hilda McAuley.

10.00 ITV News at Ten 10.30 ITV News Meridian 10.45 UEFA Europa League Highlights 11.45 Play To The Whistle 12.40am Lethal Weapon

Channel 4

6.00pm The Simpsons 6.30 Hollyoaks Mandy and Luke are very happy, but when Luke asks if he can adopt Ella, how will Mandy react?

7.00 Channel 4 News 8.00 Location, Location, Location In 2013, Phil Spencer helped retirees Peggy and Jon navigate the Norfolk coastline to find a forever home, and two years earlier Kirstie was searching along the English Riviera for local couple Jamie and Sam who needed help spending an inheritance wisely. Now, Kirstie's back - and finds there have been huge changes in their homes and their lives..

9.00 Indian Summer School See highlights.

10.00 24 Hours In Police Custody Police dig in the back garden of a house in Luton searching for the body of a woman who disappeared in 2003.

11.05 First Dates The new series continues, but is love on the menu?

12.05am 999: On The Frontline

6.00pm Latest News 6.30 The Vote Guests from the world of politics discuss local and national issues.

7.00 Under The Radar Paul and Jeff show videos.

7.30 Brighton Album Chart Show Anthea Clarke introduces a top 10 countdown of the best selling albums in Brighton.

8.00 Latest News 8.30 Live From the Roadee Live music from the Roadee - a mobile recording studio.

9.00 Tales From The Margins Extra Professor Rainer Schulze presents a special episode looking at the BFI Flare Festival.

10.00 Under The Radar Paul and Jeff introduce archive footage from Architects, Alan Vega, Gong, and Edwyn Collins.

10.30 Brighton Album Chart Show 11.00 Guy Lloyd's 2Minute Telly Show 11.05 FILM: Our Relations (1936) Comedy.

12.40am FILM: Beat Girl (1960) Drama.

Victoria Nangle

BBC1

6.00pm BBC News At Six 6.30 South East Today 7.00 The One Show 7.30 Sounds Like Friday Night Live music show.

Greg James is joined by special guest Lily Allen and others.

7.57 BBC News And Regional News 8.00 EastEnders Woody has his eyes set on a new venture.

8.30 MasterChef: The Finals Restaurateur John Torode and fruit and veg man Gregg Wallace look for Britain's next masterchef.

9.30 Have I Got News For You Regular team captains Paul Merton and Ian Hislop are joined by guest host Victoria Coren Mitchell and panellists Richard Osman and Val McDermid.

10.00 BBC News At Ten 10.25 South East Today 10.35 The Graham Norton Show Graham is joined by Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson and Naomie Harris.

11.25 Wannabe Comedy.

11.50 Commonwealth Games 2018 3.30am Commonwealth Games 2018

BBC2

ITV1

Channel 4

BBC2

ITV1

Channel 4

6.00pm Eggheads Jeremy Vine hosts the quiz show.

6.30 Today At The Games Catch up with the 27 gold medals and unmissable moments on day nine at the Commonwealth Games.

8.00 Gardeners' World There is a full hour of gardening from Longmeadow this week and Monty gets to grips with a new project.

9.00 The City And The City See highlights.

10.00 Episodes Sitcom.

Matt uses his new-found celebrity to get a new series guarantee from the network. Convinced that his best chance for success lies with Sean and Beverly, he tries to woo the reluctant Brits away from Tim. 10.30 Newsnight 11.05 Front Row Late Topical weekly discussion show.

11.35 The Assassination Of Gianni Versace American Crime Story Ascent. 1992.

Donatella's self-doubt hampers her in Milan.

12.30am Last Chance For Justice - Panorama

6.00pm ITV News Meridian 6.30 ITV Evening News 7.00 Emmerdale Chas makes a choice.

7.30 Coronation Street Eva reaches a big decision about the baby.

8.00 Love Your Garden Alan and his team come to the rescue of Claire and Ian Estick, whose younger son Daniel died in hospital from septicaemia when just 23 months old.

Devastated by their loss but determined to ease the suffering of other parents in a similar situation, they started a charity, but running it and fundraising mean that tending to their garden has had to take a back seat.

8.30 Coronation Street Simon finds himself accused of stealing Toyah's cash.

9.00 Lethal Weapon. See highlights.

10.00 ITV News at Ten 10.30 ITV News Meridian 10.45 FILM: Invictus (2009) Starring Morgan Freeman, Matt Damon, Adjoa Andoh. Sports drama based on a true story.

1.15am Jackpot247

6.00pm The Simpsons 6.30 Hollyoaks Mandy, Luke and Ollie are surprised by a visitor in the village.

7.00 Channel 4 News 8.00 I Don’t Like Mondays Would you like to take a year off work?

With your salary fully paid? That's the amazing prize on offer in this brand new comedy game show hosted by Alan Carr.

9.00 Gogglebox The biggest and best TV moments of the week get their weekly grilling from Britain's sharpest armchair critics.

10.00 Lee And Dean The third episode of the brand new bitter-sweet comedy. The guys carry out their first ever job for a gay couple.

10.35 8 Out Of 10 Cats Does Countdown Jimmy Carr hosts the comedy panel show with team captains Rob Beckett and Aisling Bea. 11.15 Rob Beckett’s Playing For Time Rob Beckett and celebrity pals travel back in time to play the greatest video games in history.

11.50 Rude Tube 12.50am FILM: Oldboy (2013)

Monday 16 BBC2

5.30pm Flog It! Gems discovered in the attic are auctioned off to awe and the gleeful rubbing of hands together at the prospect of spending the new dosh.

6.30 Today At The Games Clare Balding and Gabby Logan round up the action.

8.00 Britain’s Biggest Warship HMS Queen Elizabeth is the largest and most advanced warship ever constructed in Britain.

This follows the ultramodern super aircraft carrier as she is taken to sea for the first time on gruelling and risky sea trials that push ship and crew to breaking point.

9.00 My Year With The Tribe Will Millard travels upstream into the remote Korowai territory.

10.00 Farmalam See highlights.

10.20 FILM: The Homesman (2014) Three women who have been driven mad by pioneer life are to be transported across the country by covered wagon by the pious, independentminded Mary Bee Cuddy. Starring Hilary Swank.

12.15am FILM: The Hunters (2013)

ITV1

6.00pm Harry Hill's Alien Fun Capsule Comedy panel show.

6.30 ITV Evening News 6.45 ITV News Meridian 7.00 Celebrity Catchphrase Stephen Mulhern presents a celebrity special of the game show. The celebrity players in this edition are Ellie Simmonds, Fay Ripley, and Jimmy Carr.

8.00 The Durrells Lighthearted drama series based on Gerald Durrell's Corfu memoirs.

Louisa becomes jealous of Spiros spending time with a new Italian family who have arrived on the island - the effortlessly beautiful and impossibly glamorous Ferraris.

9.00 The Good Karma Hospital India-based hospital drama series. A building collapses in Barco and the team is stretched to the limit.

10.00 ITV News 10.20 Peston on Sunday Political magazine show featuring a mix of big political interviews, topical guests, authors, and a bit of satire. Join the conversation this Sunday.

11.15 This Time Next Year 12.10am Jackpot247

Channel 4

5.30pm Grand Designs 6.30 Channel 4 News 7.00 Escape To The Chateau Join Dick and Angel as they swap their two bed flat in Southend for their dream 19th century-Chateau.

8.00 The Crystal Maze Maze Master Richard Ayoade returns to lead a new bunch of intrepid adventurers through The Crystal Maze.

9.00 Homeland Carrie experiences problems at home. Meanwhile, Saul and Wellington work on Paley.

10.05 Lifeline Gripping Spanish medical thriller that explores what would happen if the human heart could carry memories. Alex is a happily married, successful and ambitious neurosurgeon who has just received a prestigious job offer from the noted Meyer Clinic. But he is keeping a dark secret.

11.00 8 Out Of 10 Cats Does Countdown Jimmy Carr hosts the panel/quiz show mash-up.

12.05am FILM: Out Of The Furnace (2013) Gritty crime thriller.

6.00pm Latest News 6.30 The Vote Guests from the world of politics discuss local and national issues.

7.00 TerraPura NonLeague Show All the latest non-league football news and action from the region.

8.00 Latest News The latest news where we are, the latest sports news, plus national and international updates.

8.30 Brighton Lights Jamie Walker presents a roundup of the week's must-see events in Brighton, Hove and beyond.

9.00 Tales From The Margins Extra Professor Rainer Schulze presents a series of films looking at issues affecting LGBT+ people around the world.

10.00 TerraPura NonLeague Show All the latest non-league football news and action from the region.

11.00 The Arun Valley Postcard Trail 11.15 FILM: Woman in a Dressing Gown (1957) Anthony Quayle & Sylvia Syms star in this British drama about marital strife.

1.05am BFI: The Flood (1963)

BBC1

6.00pm BBC News At Six 6.30 South East Today 7.00 The One Show 7.30 Nightmare Pets SOS Following a team of animal behaviorists as they attempt to help Britain's most troubled pets that suffer from a host of issues.

7.57 BBC News And Regional News 8.00 EastEnders Albert Square drama.

8.30 North Korea’s Secret Slave Gangs Panorama 9.00 DIY SOS: The big Build Nick Knowles and the team issue a call to arms and recruit friends, family and local trades to help transform the homes of families across Britain.

10.00 BBC News At Ten 10.30 South East Today 10.45 Have I Got A Bit More News For You The extended version of the long-running topical news quiz.

11.30 The Graham Norton Show Graham is joined by Emily Blunt, John Krasinski, and Tom Holland.

12.15am Weather For The Week Ahead

6.00pm Eggheads Quiz show.

6.30 The Repair Shop An antidote to throwaway culture, The Repair Shop shines a light on the wonderful treasures to be found in homes across the country.

8.00 Only Connect Victoria Coren Mitchell hosts the quiz.

8.30 University Challenge It is the first of the semi-finals, when one team find out if they have made it to the grand final of the quiz for students. Jeremy Paxman asks the questions.

9.00 Secret Agent Selection: WW2 Fivepart immersive history series, which revives the training programme of one of World War Two's most covert organisations.

10.00 QI Sandi Toksvig hosts the intersting fact comedy panel show.

10.30 Newsnight Indepth investigation and analysis of the stories behind the day's headlines.

11.15 Gettys: The World’s Richest Art Dynasty 12.30am Sign Zone: Countryfile

6.00pm ITV News Meridian 6.30 ITV Evening News 7.00 Emmerdale Judgement is passed on Gabby and Liv. 7.30 Coronation Street Carla and Ali agree to tackle Robert together.

8.00 Give It A Year In a brand-new factual series, Baroness Karren Brady meets the brave people who decide to go it alone and start a new business.

8.30 Coronation Street Alya realises that she is the last to know about Rana and Kate.

9.00 The Queen's Green Planet The Queen is dreaming of a lasting legacy, something that will carry her name and inspire her grandchildren. Her dream is to create a network of national forest parks from each of the 53 Commonwealth nations called the Queen's Commonwealth Canopy.

10.00 ITV News at Ten 10.30 ITV News Meridian 10.50 The Investigator: A British Crime Story Explosive documentary.

11.50 Last Laugh in Vegas 12.40am Jackpot247

6.00pm The Simpsons 6.30 Hollyoaks It's Luke's birthday, but will it end in tears when Mandy gets jealous?

7.00 Channel 4 News 8.00 The True Cost Of Green Energy: Dispatches Dispatches investigates a subsidised renewable energy industry that turns trees into fuel to keep the lights on in Britain, and in your home. Reporter Antony Barnett travels to the forestlands of the southeastern United States to find one source of this controversial 'carbonneutral' fuel.

8.30 Travel Man: 48 Hours In Madeira Richard Ayoade is joined by comic actor and writer Robert Webb the destination Madeira.

9.00 The Island With Bear Grylls See highlights.

10.00 Kiss Me First Bryan Elsley's (Skins, Dates) innovative thriller series.

11.05 Indian Summer School After three months at the Doon School, all the boys are missing home.

12.05am First Dates