Strengthening Commitment

Jennifer S. Blandford

1 / aiting forthephone calls Checking thepost I officeevery day toseeifa perfumed letteroraV card has arrived Swooning over songs on the radio thathold intense memories Counting the minutes untilthe next triphome. These arethe "teti'-tale symptoms ofa person involved ina long-distancerelationship.

Someone once said thatif ajelationship can stand thetestoftime, itcan stand anything If long-distance is thegreatest straina relationship can endure,then why do^so many college students fall prey tothe torment?

"When you have a good thing going, why should you break, itoffjust because you're separated fora few months or years?" seniorJessieS. Bollman said. "Imean,miles don't have toruina relationship. Itjusttakesalittle extra work."

Bollman and her boyfriend, Jonathan Buchanan,have been dating cross-country forfour yearsand plan tobe married sometime during 1994

"Once you're apart forawhile, you learn toappreciate the qualitiesintheother person and thetime thatyou have when you're with them," junior Craig Stavinga told a "Champion" reporter about hislong-distance love Laurie Bibighaus. "It(theseparation) has helped us grow stronger inour relationship."

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Although Craig and Laurie's relationship has worked out so well they willbe married in July, thereis a larger percentage oflong-distance relationshipsthat fail

"Allfour ofthe girlsinthe dorm room my freshman year came toschool with aboyfriend. By Christmas, we were all single," sophomore Faith Kreider said.

"Long-distance relationships can work,but itdidn'tforme,"sophomore Lisa Fieldssaid. "There's alotofpressure and,sometimes, alack oftrustinvolved When thebreak-up comes,there'salot of emotional pain. Ijustdon't think it's worth all thepain."

Though many long-distance relationships seem doomed from thestart, thereareways tomake them work

Craig offered thisadvice: "Talk toher often. Raise your phone bill; it's worth it Try tobe a major encouragement Even though you areaway from your boyfriend or girlfriend, tryto take an activeparjintheirlives. Find out what he or sheis doing asifyou areactually there. That helps a lot."