A date with Sarah-Kate
W
ROYALLY RUDE Sarah-Kate has some more advice for Harry
ith every man and his dog weighing in on Megxit, there’s absolutely no need to add my opinion to the pile – but I’m going to anyway. Last year I dispensed what I thought was some very sensible advice to Harry on the off chance he happened to pick up a copy of Woman’s Day at the dentist or similar. “If you don’t need the carriages, castles and palaces,” I said, “then I don’t believe anyone would blame you for carving out a different future for your family.” In the absence of his lovely mum, I suggested that given his privilege, the only thing he shouldn’t do is whinge. “The world is more of an oyster for you than it is for
most of us, H, so put your thinking cap on, work out a way to make the most of it, and we’ll be behind you all the way,” I promised. Given the events of the past weeks, it would appear H ignored my words of wisdom. I think perhaps Meghan packed his thinking cap when they went to stay in their multimillion-dollar hideaway on Vancouver Island. I admit thinking caps are tricky things. The Ginger lost his in the ’90s and now has to borrow mine, which is a pain in the jacksie but still, the thought is there in the end and as everyone knows, it’s the thought that counts. I take no issue with what Harry has done – his future should be of his own making – but the way he has done it leaves a lot to be desired.
His granny had a horribilis enough annus last year, what with rumours flying thick and fast about rifts between Harry and Wills, Kate and Meghan and then – don’t get me started on Prince Andrew. So for Harry to sweep back in to the UK and drop his bombshell with what seems like little warning and more than a few ultimatums while Meghan jets back to Canada and baby Archie – that’s unfair. And with Prince Philip just out of hospital? Shame on you, H. I understand the royal ginger’s mental health may be suffering, but he does have more than a few people around him who could help him. His father and Camilla, to name but a few. Heck, if I was Harry, I’d be knocking on Princess Anne’s
door. How has she done it all these years? The hardest working royal of them all more than does her duty to the Queen yet still manages to maintain a private lifestyle and a happy family. Of course her advice may be more brutal than mine. Something more along the lines of: “Pull your head in, sunshine.” I don’t want to blame Meghan for the rift in the royals. Happy wife, happy life, as the saying goes. But Canada? How will George and Charlotte and Louis go “aboot” spending time with their cousin if he’s busy dodging icicles in The Great White North? Yes, we all love our partners, but we have our families for longer. I hope Harry finds his thinking cap and uses it.
Kate’s home truths TH
ISSUE
I
must be getting old. I have noticed a shift in the way I view love. When you’re young, it’s easy to confuse love with infatuation; it’s easy to say you’ll love ’til death do you part because you may not have faced deathly situations – or have any comprehension of them. It’s easy to think love will never be hard. But marriages can be hard work. Likewise, it’s easy to say you’ll love your kids unconditionally forever, but loving kids who grow up into things that sometimes resemble monsters can be hard work. Yes, you keep loving them, but it’s not always easy to like them. So the shifting sands of time chip away at the ideals of love. But there’s real beauty in
66
Woman’s Day
making it through challenges together, in learning and growing and loving each other in different ways. Love is something you have to work at, and that in itself is rewarding. Loving babies is easy … loving teenagers – well, that can be a different story. My daughter said to me the other day that she wanted to marry someone who made her laugh, but who was also her best friend. “Like you and Mike,” she said. I was so chuffed. No, we’re not by any means perfect, but it’s awesome if you can maintain a relationship your kids want to emulate. My parents were always laughing (at and with each other) and still are! They were also (and still are) the best of friends. Their happiness with
each other was infectious. It set the bar for how we wanted to be loved and cherished. But it does take effort. I see with the new mementality, a lot of young people are all about what’s in a relationship for them. It’s all about what they can get out of it, instead of thinking about what they can put in. It’s become a modern calling card of “self-love” that if it gets tough, get going. It’s role-modelled for us in many celebrity relationships – break-ups are more often the news than make-ups. Not just marital relationships either, family relationships too. Even royals can cut and run if they don’t like the way the relationship may feel for them … hello Meghan and Harry.
So in this lovey-dovey alentine’s issue of romance Va and roses, I think it’s also good to remember that it’s not all hearts and flowers and chocolates. Sometimes love is late nights changing dirty nappies and long talks about hard subjects. Sometimes it’s swallowing your pride and biting your tongue. Sometimes it’s about saying sorry, or saying nothing at all. Yes, it can be a bed of roses for many people, but it’s disingenuous for young people to believe that that’s how it will always be – to set an unrealistic expectation of perfect fairytale happyever-afters. No, I’m not poo-pooing love! I’m just saying that like all rewards in life, it’s nothing without effort from both sides.
PICTURES: BAUER STUDIO.
Kate gets to the heart of real roman
