Feb/March 2011 On the Minds of Moms

Parents’ Fair April 9, 2011 Hilton Garden Inn, Fargo

to you by http://childrens.sanfordhealth.org

Brought

the mom message

EveryFebruary, if we are lucky, we get sweet, sometimesstill-sticky Valentine’s Day cards from our kids We stow these sentimental creations away in their keepsake totes and hide the memory in our hearts as a reminder of how much we are loved As important as these little people are in our lives, have you ever thought about NOT being there for your family—really taking yourself out of the equation?

Here at OTMOM magazine we are dedicated to helping bring awareness to February’s Go Red for woman campaign and heart disease—the number one health threat to women today Many of you may remember reading the article, Heartfelt Change in the Spring 2010 issue [for a medical update on Janie or to read her story in its intirety, visit www OnTheMindsOfMoms com]—a profile story on Janie Galegher Clow, the then 54-year-old mom of OTMOM co-founder, Dani, who on July 17th, 2008, went into cardiac arrest and took her last breath of life Like many, Janie spent the majority her life striving to find balance as a single mom and business owner who put herself on the back burner much of the time Despite being unaware and undereducated of the risks heart disease brings, Janie was given a second chance— a chance to be an example of inspiration and change With her new found commitment to herself and health she is quick to share, “To be destructive is self-centered, but to be selfish is healthy ”

Our challenge to you is put yourself back on the list of life—if you can’t do it for yourself, do it for them—your family

xoxoxo

dani and sheri co-founders & inspired moms

on the minds of moms

www.onthemindsofmoms.com

PUBLISHER DS Communication, LLC

EDITOR Dani Parkos Fluge

COPY EDITOR Deb Uglem

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e: sheri@onthemindsofmoms.com

PHOTOGRAPHY Ria Czichotzki – rialee photography

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OTMOM MISSION STATEMENT

On The Minds Of Moms Magazine is dedicated to providing parents of all ages a bi-monthly resource they can trust. A fresh approach to traditional parenting publications, we are modern and inspiring while offering a community of local support and real-life advice for today’s family.

On The Minds Of Moms contains views from across the parenting spectrum. These views do not necessarily reflect those of the publisher. All activities listed in these pages are at your own risk and require appropriate supervision.

Copyright

artwork: a kindergarten original by grace fluge

deb uglem

moorhead | mn

Raised in Finely, ND Deb has called Moorhead, MN her home for the last 10 years. Deb has been a stayat-home mom since returning to the Fargo-Moorhead area. She graduated from Drake University in Des Moines, Iowa with a degree in Journalism and Mass Communications. She is excited about her newfound time to write and finds it a welcome distraction to her daily activities. Most daily to-do’s center around her four children’s sport and school activities. Jake [17], Tony [16], Nick [16] and Emily [14] keep both her and husband Tim running in several directions. During her free time you can find her putting in some road miles, spending time with friends, or on the golf course.

dr. megan bolda

fargo | nd

Originally from Indiana and currently a member of the Catyalst Medical Center audiology team, Dr. Bolda is also a contracted audiologist for the Fargo Public Schools. Her passion lies in working with children to prevent noiseinduced hearing loss and helping them adapt to an amplified lifestyle. She enjoys quilting, knitting and having fun restoring, with her husband Dan, a 1974 Volkswagen Beetle convertible named Betty the Pumpkin Seed of Numenor.

cheryl culllen

fargo | nd

Mother to identical twins [now 18-years-old] and a former Northwest Airlines Flight Attendant [23 years in fact], Cheryl is currently the Director of Marketing & Member Support for Total Balance Health Club. She has also been a certified life coach since 2003 and leads life coaching classes at the club. She describes her perfect day as 18 holes of golf with husband Jeff of 20 years followed by a competitive match on the tennis court with pals.

melissa uetz

west fargo | nd

Born and raised in Fargo, Melissa shares her home with her wonderful husband Erik, entertaining 3-year-old son Harris, three nonchalant cats and a rambunctious dog. She teaches students on the autism spectrum for West Fargo Public Schools and blogs her experiences on the Council for Exceptional Children's national website. When not at school [either as the teacher or a grad student], Melissa enjoys traveling, reading, and stress-busting via intense house cleaning.

jeri hird dutcher

east grand forks | mn

A North Dakota native, Jeri writes award-winning resumes for US and Canadian job seekers. She shares the easy chair in her home office with her 13-year-old Luca the Wonder Cat and husband Tom who develops and designs WordPress Web sites. They have five grown children, seven grandchildren [8th due in February], and are anxiously awaiting their first great-grandchild due in July.

roxane salonen

fargo | nd

Tends a familial garden of five unique flowers with her husband, Troy, in their Fargo plot. An award-winning children's author and freelance writer, she muses about family life weekly in her blog, Peace Garden Mama www. roxanesalonen.blogspot.com.

in 5 eighth graders has tried tobacco It’s never too early to talk to your kids about smoking, but it can certainly be too late Have the talk now

3.8

percent of elementary schools provide daily PE, which means our kids are not gaining knowledge and skills they need to foster a lifetime of physical activity Only 7 9% of middle school and 2 1% high schools provide daily PE

sources: realparentsrealansers.com | goredwomen.org

32 percent of kids who play video games spent less time reading and doing homework Set and enforce strict gaming limits

20

million plastic lunch bags end up in landfills every day An ecofriendly alternative is a re-usable lunch sack

1

in 3 women each year will lose their life to heart disease This means moms, sisters, wives and friends are dying at the rate of one per minute because they don’t know heart disease kills Get educated

MEDICAL CENTER

Ear, nose & throat

Allergy

• Diagnosis

• Education

• Treatment

Hearing & Balance

• Testing

• Treatment choices

• Protection for prevention

Innovative Medicine with Compassionate Care

We are working to get to 1,000 fans our Facebook page. So, we are giving away $1,000 in products and services to one lucky winner once we reach our goal.

Prize package includes Botox, massage, custom ear buds and more. Let’s get to 1,000 fans!

ABismarck, ND native, and breast cancer survivor, Lori DeKeyser grew up as the middle child with two brothers Always knowing she wanted to be a banker, Lori attended and played volleyball at Jamestown College after high school where she majored in Accounting and Business Administration Currently the Senior Vice President of Union State Bank of Fargo, Lori and her husband Shawn of 20 years, make their home in Casselton, ND with their four children, Monica [15], Justin [12], Braden [8] and Desiree [6] Lori is actively involved with the Southwest Optimist Club in Fargo, is a member of the finance committee of St Leo’s Catholic Church in Casselton and in her spare time enjoys reading and scrapbooking

photos: rialee photography | lindsey johnson

the last time i was surprised… my 40th birthday. My husband surprised me with a Cancun getaway; leaving the following morning. He even contacted my boss and requested vacation time for me, arranged for my mom to come and stay with the kids AND packed my suitcase.

I want my kids to grow up knowing... they can do anything that they want in life as long as they plan for it, work hard, and have faith. My daughter ran her first marathon at 14. She made a plan and made it a priority and she did it.

I find relaxation in... reading. I enjoy Janet Evanovich. She is funny, ridiculous and entertaining.

my profession gives me... the chance to help people pursue their dreams. a healthy meal i really enjoy eating... is it bad that I can’t think of anything?

the most self-indulgent thing i won't give up...

Michelle, my stylist at Hair Success. She knows how to tame my crazy curls. a time period i would most like to experience...

I am quite happy living today. I think women have great opportunities to have a career or stay at home. It is all accepted.

my must have mom accessory...

my calendar. If it’s not on the calendar, it’s not happening.

something i recently found in my purse i forgot I had... money! With four kids, it seems like a never have cash.

my most prized possession [next to your kids of course]… my scrapbooks. We have so much fun looking back and remembering trips, moments, etc. I will pass them on to my kids when they are older. the book that has had the greatest impact on me...

Left to Tell by Imaculee Ilibagiza. It is about the Rwandan holocaust. Whenever I think I’m having a bad day or a tough time, I try to put it into perspective. I have a good life. when i am under the weather, one thing that always makes me feel better... Pepsi.

as a family we always make time for... a sit down meal together several times a week and evening prayer time together.

hands down, my least favorite household chore...

it must be the German in me, but I don’t mind household chores as long as I have time to do them. I do pawn off folding socks whenever possible though.

placeperfect finding the for you

story by | beth christianson-melby

Awarm, sunny summer day. Honey is tackling the “to-do” list you gave him. The sound of high-pitched laughter echoes as your kids run through the sprinkler in the neighbor’s yard. You soak in the sun while you work in the garden, it looks beautiful. A car passes, you wave, because that’s just the kind of neighborhood this is… Sound familiar? Like where you’d like to raise your family and live the life you’ve always wanted? Before choosing your perfect place to buy or build, take a moment to consider a few things:

• neighborhood Drive through your new neighborhood at different times of the day. Is it quiet during “quiet time” with activity on the weekends? If you’re a get-up-and-move kind of person, are there sidewalks, parks and exercise facilities close by? Remember to check it out at night. You’ll be able to see how well the neighborhood is lit.

• schools Call the principal to schedule a tour of the school your kids will be attending. While there, find out test scores, the student-teacher ratio, transportation options and average class size. According to greatschools.org, researchers have found that gains in achievement occur when class size is less than 20 students. These gains are stronger for the early grades, but are shown

to continue into the upper grades where students are less likely to be held back and more likely to stay in school and earn better grades.

• healthcare There’s nothing more important than the availability of quality healthcare. An emergency room is one of those things that you don’t really think about until you need it. But having life-saving or even boo-boo patching services close by are important. How far is the clinic or pharmacy from your new home? If you have older parents who you care for, you’ll want to check locations of senior living facilities.

• faith Here in the valley, faith is very important. You want to make getting to church and being involved in church activities convenient. When moving to a new neighborhood or town, make sure there is a church that is right for you.

• taxes Most people only think property taxes when considering a home or lot purchase. Special assessments for city improvements and utility costs also factor into what it really costs to live in an area. Make sure to measure these costs against what you are getting. Good schools, police and fire protection, libraries, parks, clean and well maintained streets, and proper drainage all cost money. Considering the costs and the benefits, is it a good value overall?

• crime The safety of your new neighborhood is crucial. Visit the local police station. You’ll be able to ask about crime statistics and if there are any registered sex offenders in the area. The United States Department of Justice also provides the Dru Sjodin National Sex Offender Public Website at www.nsopw.gov.

• covenants & zoning Most cities and neighborhoods have covenants and zoning in place. Covenants and zoning regulate things like whether or not, and how high, a fence can be built, how far from intersections trees can be planted, the exterior color of the house and where cars are parked. When building, covenants and zoning may also include the number of garage stalls, building materials, square footage and elevation. So, if you’ve always dreamed of a white picket fence, make sure your neighborhood allows them!

• commute Lastly, before you buy, drive from your house to work at different times to determine how long it takes you. Sometimes commuting from a distance can actually save time and money. No stop and go traffic in town results in better gas mileage!

Built on a tradition of hospitality, Hillsboro, North Dakota has amenities for everyone, including a pool, park, ice skating rink, golf course, and a 24/7 fitness center. This community of 1,600 is committed to children and families. In 2010, Hillsboro High School’s scholarship program awarded $41,150 to 27 students. In fact, every senior who applied got one. Come for a visit at I-29 exit 104 and experience Hillsboro Hospitality for yourself—it’s all just a cup of coffee away!

701.636.2657

beth christianson-melby

General manager of Hometown Aditude, a full-service marketing and advertising firm, Beth’s passions include rural economic development, farming, and family. A native of Halstad, Minnesota, Beth and husband Doug live in Hillsboro with their four-legged friends. Beth is active in her church, serving as congregational president

I-29 Exit 104 HillsboroND.com

on pins & needles: acupuncture

& kids

more than pins & needles

story by | jen demaio

People are discovering herbs and Traditional Chinese Medicine [TCM] as a safe, effective alternative for the treatment of many childhood illnesses. Preventative medicine can benefit children greatly and preventative TCM provides the same positive results. TCM has treated children for centuries; pediatrics is one of the medicines best specialties [since the Song Dynasty 960–1279].

Because TCM is a holistic medicine, healing focuses on balancing the qi [pronounced "chee", means energy] of the internal organs by taking into account both physical and emotional symptoms. Children are usually more susceptible to getting sick, but are also quicker to heal. For most common pediatric complaints, healing can come through herbal medicine and or dietary changes. The goal of all pediatric treatment is to restore balance and harmony to a child. Here are some of the common childhood conditions treated with TCM:

• Cough

• ADD and ADHD

• Asthma

• Urinary Tract Infections

• Bed Wetting

• Allergies

• Fever

• and more

Some parents are nervous about bringing in their child to get acupuncture because of its association with needles, but surprisingly many children do not have a problem with the needles. Also, not all treatments require needles.

Part of the treatment could be following dietary guidelines, cutting out foods that Chinese medicine looks at as difficult to digest, such as greasy and fried foods. Another treatment could be taking herbs. Many of these treatments have been used in China for thousands of years and many children and adults have had impressive improvements.

Oriental medicine views the treatment of children to be extremely important, and usually the most important system to treat is the digestive system in children. The focus of the digestive system in Oriental medicine consists of the spleen and stomach systems.

According to Chinese medical theory, children's spleens and stomachs [up to about age six] are immature, because they are still developing. That means the level of function is not the same as in a healthy adult. With the digestive system being weak and overworked, it is common to hear children complaining about various digestive problems.

another consideration

TCM can also help reduce the overuse and misuse of antibiotics as well as serve as an alternative to antibiotics. The US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention [CDC] estimate that one-third of the 150 million prescriptions written for antibiotics each year are not necessary. These unnecessary prescriptions can results in bacterial strains that become stronger than the antibiotics being used against them. Children are among the patients most susceptible to antibiotic resistant super bugs.

worth considering

Children tend to outgrow many common pediatric diseases as they mature and develop the qi of their lung, spleen and liver becomes stronger. Damage to the qi of these internal organs can result in such problems as digestive complaints, respiratory illnesses, and temper tantrums. Herbal formulas can be effective in the treatment of illness as well as in preventing illness when there is a history of chronic infections and antibiotic use. TCM can be an effective option for your child, and the whole

family! Set up an informational appointment and get your questions answered.

Two Turtles Wellness Center uses time-honored Chinese medicine to help you improve the quality of your life with safe, natural and effective techniques by making acupuncture accessible to all individuals.

810 4th Ave S #100, Moorhead www.2turtleswellness.com 218.287.4501

jen demaio

Co-owner of Two Turtles Wellness Center and a Licensed Acupuncturist specializing in working with women and kids, Jen brings humor and honesty with her to work every day. Jen and her husband, Steve Spader [a fellow acupuncturist] share in the duties of the practice. In her spare time, you may find this mom of two growing boys, Gabe [7] and Cole [3], playing soccer, running with friends, knitting or hanging out with friends and family.

riding out…

the perfect

story by | kathleen wrigley

As my deadline [for this column] approaches, I am thought-less, or unable to turn those endless ideas into constructive sound-bites for this issue. The harder I try, the worse it gets. I walk away from casual conversations thinking, “hmmm…there’s a thought.” Or, “oh, I should really do something with that tidbit.” All to no avail. I wonder if the holidays have sucked the “just a thought…” right outta me.

Then—it started to snow. December 30, 2010. The perfect storm. The wind picked up and the roads shut down. The Doppler radar was going gang-busters while the

meteorologists stood before their colorful maps, giddy and glowing, knowing half the state of homebound holiday-ers hung on every breaking forecast. This was gonna be a doozy.

The kids were giddy, too. The three of them stared out the back door in awe of Mother Nature. She was a force and they were bracing themselves for impact.

For mom, the forecast meant quality play time and togetherness—a chance to slow down, connect, and enjoy each other. FUN! The itinerary: art projects, board games, baking, snuggling & watching Christmas movies, competing in family dance-offs, organizing bedrooms and closets—ok, not a crowd favorite, but

photo: thuen design | scott thuen

this was to be the Perfect Storm! Thank you. Thank you, Mother Nature!

At first there were minor set-backs—whining, claustrophobia, fighting over turns during games. Just testing our will. Ok. All right. Understandably, we’re all getting a little frustrated. Time to re-focus. Ride it out.

The next few hours were deceptively delicious. Mom’s dream of baking with all three cherubs dressed in their pediatric aprons stirring and taste-testing batter with floury faces, turned into kids sneaking into and scaling the shelves of the pantry to reach their left-over Halloween candy. Fine. I’m game. So, we ate—as a family. Snickers really do satisfy.

With our bellies full of sugar, we braced ourselves for the second leg of the storm. The walls closed in and the complaints poured out…”I’m bored. I don’t feel like doing that. That’s no fun. Can we have a sleep-over? Let’s go to a movie. I don’t like any of ours. I’m bored. There’s nothing to do. Can we have a sleep-over? When is it gonna stop? Can we go to Dynoland? I’m bored.”

Mother Nature travelled north, and things at our house headed south. The hours turned into days, and reality hit: “perfect” and “storm” were an oxymoron.

Pick your passion: Monopoly, Sorry, UNO…more dancing? Or, should we get trash bags and start organizing?”

The crinkled looks on the kids’ faces said, “You nutty broad. Get control of yourself. You’re the mom.”

Then, I remembered the pharmacist’s set of instructions and predictions about our ZICAM patient: “push lots of liquids and expect loose stools.”

Dutifully, I poured myself a glass of wine and waited… for Mother Nature to take her course.

Kathleen is a stay-at-home mom who serves on a number of community boards/committees, is active in her church, kids’ school, and politics and runs to sustain her own mental health! This Philadelphia native is married to a fourth generation North Dakotan, Drew, and proudly considers North Dakota her home. They have three children. Before becoming a mom, she was director for Bismarck’s Child Advocacy Center and was a speech writer. Kathleen received a BS from The Pennsylvania State University and completed her graduate studies at Temple University, in Philadelphia.

Pillow fights turned children into wrestlers with rage. Forts were destroyed after bickering ensued over ownership rights of blankets and pillows. Our 2-year-old’s “art project” meant writing on the walls and a table, “ohhh, wook at my pwetty pwoject.” HUH?!

That same toddler mastered her fine motor skills when we found her hiding behind the couch with an open container of ZICAM cold tablets and a chalky paste dripping from her chin!

This “Perfect Storm” was maddening. Its effects were exasperating and I heard myself yelling: “Only boring people get bored! This is supposed to be fun! We are together! We have everything we need! Stop fighting!

parent resources

for the fargo-moorhead area

DivorceCare for Kids 13 week session for kids ages 6 and up at Hope Lutheran South Campus – Call for session dates 701.235.6629

Up With Downs Supporting families of Down syndrome. For more information, contact Kara Jones, 701.526.3240 or karaljones@gmail.com, or Liz St. Louis, 701.212.7877 or estlouis4@gmail.com

Red River Moms Of Multiples 2nd Tuesday of each month. For more information visit www.rrvmothersofmultiples.org

Adoption Play Support Group For more details call 701.200.3285 or email shellemoran@yahoo.com

Compassionate Friends 2nd Thursday of each month, 7:30pm at Faith Lutheran Church, 127 2nd Ave E, West Fargo. Offering grief support after the death of a child. For more information patkylene@hotmail.com or 701.282.4794

Tender Transitions Every Tuesday and Friday from 12:00pm to 3:00pm at Essentia Health South University 6th Floor Conference Room. For all new moms in the FM area. For questions, call 701.364.8066

SHARE: Pregnancy & Infant Loss Support Group 3rd Tuesday of every month at 7:00pm at Faith United Methodist Church [19th Ave. N, Fargo]. This nondenominational group offers support to those whose lives are touched by the tragic death of a baby through early pregnancy loss, stillbirth or within the first few months of life. For more information call 701.234.7500

Autism Support Group 2nd Friday of each month from 7:00pm to 9:00pm at Triumph Lutheran Church in Moorhead. For more information call group contact Rachel at 218.287.1184

DMF Lend A Hand Offers resources and matching funds to improve volunteer efforts that benefit people experiencing a medical crisis. Learn more about current efforts and/or to make a tax-deductible donation go to www.dakmed.org/lendahand

Fargo-Moorhead Home Schoolers Christian home schooling Moms who want to network ideas and provide support to homeschooling families. For more information contact Karen - jkisgrig@msn.com or 701.967.8990

HOPE, Inc. Provides a year-round sports and recreation program for children and young adults ages 2-23 with mobility challenges. We are family-centered and provide extra equipment so the ENTIRE family can play! Contact Adair at 701.866.9002 or agrommesh@cableone.net for more information or visit www.hopeinconline.org

KIDS ARE OUR BUSINESS BREAKFAST

April 27, 2011 at 7:30 a.m.

Fargo Holiday Inn

$65 Individual Tickets

Table Sponsorships Available

Pre-Registration Strongly Encouraged

www.raccfm.com

701.293.7273

Breastfeeding Support Group Meets once a month from 6:00pm to 7:00pm at Essentia Health. Call 701.364.8100 or visit www.innovishealth.com for more information and other support group opportunities

Rape & Abuse Crisis Center Crisis intervention, advocacy, and counseling services to all persons who have been victims of domestic violence or sexual abuse. Volunteer or donate. Call 701.293.7273 or visit www.raccfm.com

Rainbow Bridge Visitation & Safe Exchange Because of dedicated individuals who volunteer their time, Rainbow Bridge is able to meet the ever increasing visitation needs of our families. For more information visit www.rainbowbridgekids.net or call 218.299.7694

FirstChoice Clinic Provides pregnancy confirmation and counseling, prenatal and parenting classes, community referrals to help individuals make life affirming choices. Call 701.237.5902 or visit www.firstchoiceclinic.com. Volunteer or donate at www.teamfirstchoiceclinic.com

Survivor of Suicide Loss 3rd Thursday of each month. Provide a safe, accepted and supportive environment and opportunity to talk openly. For more information contact Mary at 701.219.4110

PATH of North Dakota An organization offering a more personalized approach to foster care. For more information www.pathinc.org or 701.293.9968

FirstLink Provides telephone support including information and referral of local non-profits, listening and support, crisis intervention and suicide intervention 701.235.7335

Hospice An end-of-life care that provides comfort and support for patients and their families, Hospice also provides support groups for adults and children grieving the loss of a loved one. For more information or to make a donation, visit www.hrrv.org

Cullen Children’s Foundation Provide financial resources to organizations that support children’s healthcare needs, with an emphasis on cancer. For information on volunteering, being a part of a committee or to make a donation, visit www.cullyskids.com

Dakota Boys and Girls Ranch Offers a year-round opportunity for volunteers [individuals, groups/ part-time, full-time] for its thrift stores. To volunteer call 701.277.9424

Basic Training for New Dads With an experienced dad leading the way, new dads discuss adjusting to fatherhood, what to expect from a newborn baby and how to support mom during this time. For more information visit www.innovishealth.com

For more listings, visit www.OnTheMindsOfMoms.com/support. To submit a group or resource for consideration to be posted on our website, email information to info@onthemindsofmoms.com. OTMOM does its best to keep information accurate, but organizations are responsible for providing updated information. It is always a good idea to call ahead to confirm the information provided.

New for fall 2011!

Oak Grove Lutheran School is launching an Early Learning Center in the fall of 2011. Oak Grove will offer a full-day Pre-Kindergarten program for 4 & 5 year olds and a half-day preschool program two days per week for 3 year olds. After school care will be available.

Space is limited. Apply today!

Oak Grove Lutheran School offers an academic curriculum in a Christian environment for students in Pre-K thru Grade 12. Small class sizes, relationships, a focus on service and extra-curricular activities are the heart of the Oak Grove experience.

when mom’s ready for

career

making

a smooth transition back into the workforce

photo: thuen design | scott thuen

story by | jeri hird dutcher

Once you’re a mom, you’re always a mom. It doesn’t matter how many generations show up at Sunday dinner, you’re still somebody’s mom!

At some point, though, you may want to do other types of work as well. We call that Mom’s Career 2.0. You might be returning to your career full time, exploring the possibility of an entirely new field, or keeping your skills sharp for the time when you want to return to employment away from home. In any case, it usually means that you want to spend some time preparing for a big change in routine.

That’s what one of my favorite moms did. Both of Alicia’s children were in school, and her military husband was off to a 12-month assignment overseas.

Alicia wanted a full-time job while he was away, but there were several catches. First, she wanted it only for a year. When her husband returned, the family would be moving to another military assignment. Second, she wanted to be available to her children, especially since their father was away. A position with a lot of travel would not be ideal.

Third, she wanted to change careers. Before she was married, she had been a computer programmer. Then, she stayed home with her children and became a Command Spouse. Her husband was one of the top leadership team members during their last few assignments, and the wife of a military leader has a built-in job. She is expected to host dinners and lunches at the drop of a beret, advocate for the families of the soldiers in her husband’s command, and generally hold things together for their military community.

doubts and fears

Now, that she’d had 15 years to think about it, she wanted to try her hand at event planning, but it had been most of those 15 years since she’d held a paying

job. Unfortunately, the Command Spouse job does not come with a salary. She knew she could do the work but had doubts about proving it to anyone reading her resume. Would anyone want to hire her? She had only started to plan when a position opened in the community for an event planner. Alicia was determined to land it.

We went to work on her resume and used every example she could remember of event planning, organization, and scheduling in her Command Spouse experience. It read like an executive’s journal, except instead of corporate personnel, she was leading the Officers’ Spouses Club, advocating for families through the Key Spouses group, co-hosting official functions for 19

she knew she could do the work but had doubts about proving it to anyone reading her resume would anyone want to hire her?

squadrons, recruiting and assigning help for families whose military members were on remote assignment overseas, and raising money for scholarships for military members’ children.

the plan

We devised a strategy for her to network her way to the people who made the hiring decision. She made several phone calls to people she knew who agreed to introduce her around the department in which she wanted to work.

She was introduced, hand-delivered her resume, and watched [breathlessly, she admitted when she called me from her car] as one of the decision-makers read it. The first thing she heard was, “You’re making this easy for us.”

Several weeks later, she had an interview and then the job, just for a year, they knew, but they said they’d rather have someone as good as she was for one year than someone mediocre forever.

find a career, not just a job

How do you give your career change story an ending as happy as Alicia’s? First, don’t just look for a job. Alicia had that luxury because she was going to be in the community only one more year.

For most of us, that is not the case. We want a long-term commitment, not just a “date.” If that is true for you, don’t settle for a single job that will make it necessary for you to do another job search in a few years. Aim for a company that will allow and encourage you to grow with them.

Here are some tips to use now so when your kids are in school, you’re ready to put on your business suit [whatever that means] and find the career you’ve dreamed of.

1. do your research Whether you return to your former career or decide on another field, you’ll need to find out which companies hire the type of starting position you have in mind. Google [or another search engine] will become your best friend. Remember, though, data obtained on the Internet isn’t always reliable, so you need to confirm it all.

Make a list of the questions you need to answer about the companies you will research. Your list might include:

• Does the company have a series of positions I want?

• If not, are there parts of positions that I like there?

• Is there, perhaps, one or more positions that could be created for me?

• What is the corporate culture?

• How are performance reviews and promotions handled?

• How long do employees usually stay there?

• What motivates the employees to stay?

• What is the leadership style?

• What do employees like about this company?

• What do employees dislike about this company?

and Private Businesses Ranked Within Industry Category and State.

• Million Dollar Directory, Dun & Bradstreet.

• Adams Job Bank.

• Kennedy Book of Recruiters [thick red book in library or bookstore]

2. focus When you’ve found the possibilities, narrow the list to three or four companies that fit you best. Don’t worry about whether they have positions open at this point.

3. rewrite your resume Revise your resume to target this type of employer. You may need to tailor it a bit more for each employer you will be contacting. Be sure to list accomplishments rather than just serial job descriptions.

Here are sites to visit to find information about companies:

• LinkedIn [www.Linkedin.com] has a search feature now for companies. You can also search on people within LinkedIn and find a company that way.

• Vault [www.vault.com] features employee-written reviews of companies.

• Hoovers [www.hoovers.com] compiles information on large corporations.

• Email4Corporations [http://sites.google.com/ site/emails4corporations/] gives you email addresses for people you may want to reach.

• Bureau of Labor Statistics [www.stats.bls.gov] tells you all of the numbers about employment you’ll ever want to know.

• Occupational Outlook Handbook [www.bls.gov/ oco/] describes the duties and responsibilities of many positions.

• Best Companies to Work For [www.greatplacetowork.com/best_companies/index.html] will tell you which companies are ranked best according to how they treat employees.

Don’t forget your public and university libraries are excellent research environments. There, you’ll find:

• Dun & Bradstreet Business Rankings: Public

4. don’t ask for a job Write a cover letter appropriate to a networking situation because you won’t be asking for a job. The networking conversation you will ask for in your cover letter will be an opportunity to speak to the person in charge of hiring in the department or division in which you are interested.

aim for a company that will allow and encourage you to grow with them

Just For You Clothing

5. network Find someone you know at each company or someone who can introduce you to an employee, preferably the person who would make the hiring decision. Don’t give up if it doesn’t work the first time. Even if the person you do talk to doesn’t know the hiring manager, he or she may know someone closer who is likely to want to help you.

In addition, use the networking skills that found you that fantastic babysitter to find people willing to help you reach your goal by keeping their ears open about positions. Let them know that passing on company news such as a promotion or retirement is good, too, because a position may open as a result.

6. ask for a conversation When you get to the right person, ask for half an hour of their time. This isn’t a job interview [although you should be dressed and prepared like it is]. Instead, you ask questions about the company that you were not able to answer in your research. You also let the decision maker know what you want and ask if s/he can recommend anyone else for you to talk with in the company or within your targeted area. Remember to write and take along your list of questions about the company, based on your research. Keep your eyes and ears open to see if they shape up as well in person as they did online.

7. write a thank you note Although this is not a job interview, you did receive the gift of time from a busy person. Acknowledge it with a hand-written note. Take the opportunity to restate your target and ask them to let you know of anyone you should contact.

Repeat the last six steps as many times as it takes. trust yourself and the process. Contact me if you feel discouraged.

gettin’ through it

use the networking skills that found you that fantastic babysitter to find people willing to help you reach your goal

12

Sweetheart Ball

701.232.3980

www.rmhcfargo.org

Support the Ronald McDonald House of the Red River Valley at the Holiday Inn with an evening featuring dinner, a live & silent auction and dancing. Tickets are $75.

12, 13, 19, 20, 26 & 27

Frosty Flicks

701.461.8902

www.marcustheatres.com

Grab the family & head to West Acres Cinema Saturday at 10:00am & Sunday at 11:00am to catch Nanny Mcphee Returns, Alpha & Omega & Cats/Dogs: The Revenge of Kitty Galore for just $2!

13

Destination Anchor Island

701.241.8160

www.fargoparks.com

Get out of the cold & take a cruise to Anchor Island 1:00pm–5:00pm at the Fargo South indoor pool. Enjoy a Sunday afternoon in the Caribbean with music, water games & prizes. $2 per swimmer.

14

Junie B. Jones & the Mushy Gushy Valentine Party

701.241.1495

www.fargolibrary.org

Spend “Valentime’s” Day with Junie B. Jones at a mush gushy Valentine party! Kids in grades K–2 are invited to play games, eat some goodies & share favorite Junie stories at the Main Library [102 3rd St N, Fargo] at 4:00pm. Pre-registration required.

15

Basic Training for New Dads

www.innovishealth.com// Services/WomensChildrens

This one-time evening class is designed for 'dads to be'. An experienced dad leads the class. Topics discussed include adjustments to fatherhood, what to expect from a newborn baby & how to support mom during this time. Class is from 6:30pm–8:00pm, register online.

16

Junior Artist

701.241.8160

www.fargoparks.com

Spend an afternoon with your child [ages 3–5] at the Robert D. Johnson Rec Center exploring the world of art from 1:30pm-2:30pm.

17

Leap Frog

701.277.9240

www.redriverzoo.org

Visit the Red River Zoo to learn some fun-frog-facts & discover some of their slimy relatives! For ages 4–6. Starts at 2:00pm.

19

Celebration of Woman and Their Music

www.debjenkins.com/ celebrationofwomen.html

Folk, jazz, rock and pop… there is something for everyone at the Celebration of Women and Their Music. The 14th annual concert starts at 6:30pm at the historic Fargo Theatre.

19 Awesome Art Afternoon

701.241.8160

www.fargoparks.com

Come and spend an afternoon of creative fun & exciting art projects at the Robert D. Johnson Rec Center. Children will be able to create a variety of art projects to take home. 1:00pm–3:00pm.

19

Paws to Read

701.241.1495

www.cityoffargo.com

Developing readers in grades K-6 can cuddle up & read to a certified reading therapy pet at the Main Library. Sessions are 15 minutes long & are scheduled from 1:00pm–3:00pm. Bring your own book or pick one from our collection. Space is limited; registration is required. To sign up, contact Children's Services.

20

Family Day at the Dike 701.499.6060

www.fargoparks.com

Races, sledding, hotdogs & pop for the whole family at Dike West. Be there 1:00pm–4:00pm.

19, 20 & 21

President's Day Sidewalk Sale

www.moorheadcentermall.com

Shop til you drop at the Moorhead Center Mall!

25

Buddy Day @ Oak Grove

701.373.7114

www.oakgrovelutheran.com

Are you interested in Oak Grove? Come join us for grades 6-12 Buddy Day [8:00am–12:45pm] to see what life is like as a Grover. Seeing the campus, attending classes, experiencing chapel, meeting students & teachers will give you a good idea of what Oak Grove has to offer.

25

Willy Wonka Chocolate Party

701.241.1495

www.fargolibrary.org

Kids in grades 4–6 who love chocolate & Willy Wonka are invited to a party at the Main Library [102 3rd St N]. The fun starts at 2:00pm & kids will play chocolatethemed games, make a craft, read parts of Willy Wonka books & eat chocolate. Pre-registration is required.

25, 26 & 27

Home & Garden Show

701.241.9100

www.fargodome.com

Believe it or not, under all this snow there is a garden. No better way to get inspired and excited for Spring. Doors open at 3:00pm on the 25th, 9:00am on the 26th and 11:00am on the 27th.

26

4th Annual Youth Ice Fishing Derby

701.241.1356

www.fargoparks.com

Calling all Ice Fisherpersons ages 15 & under! Come to the South Woodhaven Pond [4802 Woodhaven Dr S, Fargo] & learn more about ice fishing including augers, ice houses, sonar equipment & much more! This is a FREE event, 12:30pm–2:30pm.

28

Are Your Kids Riding Safely?

701.234.7233

www.north.sanfordhealth.org

Did you know that 80% of children are riding incorrectly? This class will give you the education to correctly use & install a car seat, as well as learn about child passenger safety laws, airbags & bus safety. Make an appointment to be at the Sanford Auditorium [801 Broadway N, Fargo] between 6:00pm–9:30pm. Space is limited & pre-registration required. $30 fee.

march events

5

7

Kid Quest: The Great Art Free For All

701.232.3821

www.plainsart.org

In honor of Youth Art Month, you will expand your mind & stretch your imagination with unlimited art-making possibilities at the Plains Art Museum from 10:00am–Noon. Bring your creativity & we’ll supply the stuff from which art is made. This is a FREE event, but pre-registration is required.

5

Unglued: Craft Fest

www.ungluedcraftfest.com

Head to the downtown Fargo American Legion ballroom on 9:00am–4:00pm for an indie craft fair & bazaar that is bringing back traditional crafting techniques with a fresh, new flair & lots of midwest love.

5, 6, 12, 13, 19 & 20

Frosty Flicks

701.461.8902

www.marcustheatres.com

Grab the family & head to West Acres Cinema Saturday at 10:00am & Sunday at 11:00am to catch Legend of Guardians, Megamind & Yogi Bear for just $2!

Super Hero Paper Dolls

218.233.7594

www.larl.org

Cut, color & create your own awesome Super Hero paper dolls. Make several costumes & accessories to keep your Super Hero in style! Starts at 6:00pm at the Moorhead Library.

8

Butterfly Ball Tickets On Sale

701.241.8160

www.fargoparks.com

Attentions dads, uncles and grandpas! Get your tickets today at 8:00am at the RDJ Rec Center [1104 2nd Ave S] for the Butterfly Ball. This semi-formal father/ daughter [ages 4–12] prom includes music, dancing, photo opportunities & a mini grand march at the Ramada Plaza Suites April 8th, 9th & 15th. $12 per person.

8

Basic Training for New Dads

www.innovishealth.com/ Services/WomensChildrens

This one-time evening class is designed for 'dads to be'. An experienced dad leads the class. Topics discussed include adjustments to fatherhood, what to expect from a

newborn baby & how to support mom during this time. Class is from 6:30pm –8:00pm, register online.

9 & 17

A Barrel of Monkeys

701.277.9240

www.redriverzoo.org

Come & learn about the new monkeys making their home at the Red River Zoo. They would love to see you & play with the toys you make for them during this entertaining program. For ages 4–6 at 10:00am on the 9th or 2:00pm on the 17th.

12

Celtic Festival

701.241.8160

www.fargoparks.com

This festival features entertainment stages, several presentations about folk traditions of the past & present, activities booths & Celtic foods at the Hjemkomst Center, Moorhead 10:00am–4:00pm.

12

B.L.A.S.T Babysitter's Day

Camp

701.364.1704

www.fmambulance.com

The initial course for teens & pre-teens on the responsibilities of caring for children.

They will learn CPR & first aid for children, diaper changing techniques, as well as when to call 911 & what will happen if they do need emergency assistance. The course is designed for young babysitters ages 11–15. Limited space. Register online.

12 & 13

Fargo Ice Revue

701.499.6060

www.fargoparks.com

At the end of each year’s skating season, students from each of the Park District classes present an Ice Skating Revue. Be at the Coliseum [801 17th Ave N] Saturday at 7:00pm or Sunday at 2:00pm.

12 & 13

Antique & Collectible Show

www.moorheadcentermall.com

Checkout the treasures you can take home from the Moorhead Center Mall.

17

Car Seat 101 for Expectant Parents

701.234.7233

www.north.sanford.org

Are your car seats installed correctly? Don't take the chance! This class is designed for expectant parents & focuses on infant car seats for newborns. Make an appointment to

basketball friends family good times athletes fun gratitude ALS treatment cure basketball friends family good times athletes fun grat- itude ALS treatment cure basketball friends family good times athletes fun gratitude ALS treatment cure basketball friends family good times athletes fun gratitude ALS treat- ment cure basketball friends family good times athletes fun gratitude ALS treatment cure basketball friends family good times athletes fun gratitude ALS treatment cure basketball friends family good times ath- letes fun gratitude ALS treatment cureas- ketball friends family good times athletes fun gratitude ALS treatment cure basketball friends family good times athletes fun grat- itude ALS treatment cure basketball friends

good times athletes fun gratitude ALS treat-

WHEN: March 26th, 2011 WHERE: Shanley High School, Fargo, ND

TIME: Girls @ 5pm WHAT: A night of family fun & exhibition basketball games Boys @ 7pm featuring the area’s top high school athletes.

WHO: Hosted by the Kottsick Krusade, which consists of friends and family of a Fargo woman, Julie Kottsick, who was diagnosed with ALS five years ago. Learn more about Julie at www.onthemindsofmoms.com/past-issues

For more inforegarding the event visit www.juliekottsickalsjam.com or contact Bud or Julie Kottsick at kottsick1234@msn.com or text 701-367-2673.

For sponsorship inquiries contact Jodi Buchholz at jbuchholz@dfcconsultants.com

be at the Sanford Auditorium [801 Broadway N, Fargo] between 6:30pm–8:00pm. Space is limited. Pre-registration is necessary.

19 Awesome Art Afternoon

701.241.8160

www.fargoparks.com

Come & spend an afternoon of creative fun & exciting art projects at the Robert D. Johnson Rec Center 1:00pm–3:00pm. Children will be able to create a variety of art projects to take home.

19 Spring Golf Expo

701.499.6060

www.fargoparks.com

Get your swing on at Courts Plus Fitness Center [3491 S University Dr, Fargo] 9:00am–Noon.

19

Paws to Read

701.241.1495

www.cityoffargo.com

Developing readers in grades K–6 grade can cuddle up & read to a certified reading therapy pet at the Main Library. Sessions are 15 minutes long & are scheduled from 1:00pm–3:00pm. Bring your own book

or pick one from our collection. Space is limited; registration is required. To sign up, contact Children's Services.

20

Gold-N-Motion

701.280.0400

www.americangoldgymnastics.com

Don’t miss this opportunity to see to see why our local talent is considered some of the top competitive & show gymnasts in the country!

21

Are Your Kids Riding Safely?

701.234.7233

www.north.sanfordhealth.org

Did you know that 80% of children are riding incorrectly? This class will give you the education to correctly use & install a car seat, as well as learn about child passenger safety laws, airbags & bus safety. Make an appointment to be at the Sanford Auditorium [801 Broadway N, Fargo] between 6:00pm–9:30pm. Space is limited & pre-registration required. $30 fee.

24

Active Parenting Teens

701.231.8944

www.ag.ndsu.edu/ casscountyextension/ home-and-family

Active Parenting of Teens will give you the guidance & support you need to turn the challenges of raising a teenager into opportunities for growth. This 3 session course is at the West Fargo High School Library March 24th, 31st & April 7th 6:30pm–8:00pm. $15 fee & pre-registration required.

25 & 26

Bouncin' Bash & More

701.433.5360

www.wfparks.org

This weekend of inflatable family fun will take place at the Veterans Memorial Arena & features many obstacle courses, giant slides, bouncy castles, volcano climb, wrecking ball, mechanical bull, boulderdash, kiddlieland area & more. Open 4:00pm–9:00pm on the 25th and 9:00am–4:00pm on the 26th. $7 per person. 26

Julie Kottsick ALS Jamboree

701.367.2673

Kottsick1234@msn.com

www.juliekottsickjamboree.com

Be at the Shanley High School & experience

a night of family fun & take in exhibition basketball games featuring the area’s top boy & girl senior athletes. This event will raise awareness & funds for the Minnesota ALS Association, now serving North Dakota. All proceeds help serve families in Minnesota & North Dakota dealing with this devastating disease. For more information about ALS & the services provided please visit www.alsmn.org.

26

Teddy Bear Tea Party

701. 241.8160

www.fargoparks.com

Kiddos [ages 3–8] come dressed up for tea & bring your favorite teddy bear to Rheault Farm [2902 25th St S, Fargo] 10:00am–11:00am. Learn etiquette basics through fun games while enjoying bite sized snacks & refreshments. $6 fee per child & pre-registration is required.

26

Ballerina Tea Party

218.233.7594

www.larl.org

Join us for a special Ballerina themed tea party at 2:00pm at the Moorhead Library where we will read ballerina stories and share treats!

Get fit, feel better. Try Whole Body Vibration and train more muscles in 10 minutes than most workouts do in 60.

Get fit, feel better. Try Whole Body Vibration and train more muscles in 10 minutes than most workouts do in 60.

Tired of chronic pain and discomfort returning?

Tired of chronic pain and discomfort returning?

Our customized rehab programs can treat the cause, not just the symptom.

Our customized rehab programs can treat the cause, not just the symptom.

april events

Child Abuse Prevention Month

www.stopchildabusend.com, www.pcamn.org

Help strengthen families & prevent child abuse & neglect.

1, 2 & 3

El Zagal Shrine Circus

701.235.7521

www.fargoshrinecircus.com

Lions & tigers & cotton candy...OH MY!

Head to the FARGODOME for some fun.

Shows are at 7:00pm on the 1st, 10:00 am on the 2nd & 5:00pm on the 3rd.

2

Kid Quest: Say Cheese!

701.232.3821

www.plainsart.org

Have your portrait snapped at our cool photo station at the Plains Art Museum from 10:00am–Noon. Then cut it out, make a stick puppet & create a surreal, out-of-this-world environment to put yourself in. Sound crazy? It is! This is a FREE event, but pre-registration is required.

4

Are Your Kids Riding Safely?

701.234.7233

www.north.sanfordhealth.org

Did you know that 80% of children are riding incorrectly? This class will give you the education to correctly use & install a car seat, as well as learn about child passenger safety laws, airbags & bus safety. Make an appointment to be at the Sanford Auditorium [801 Broadway N, Fargo] between 6:00pm–9:30pm. Space is limited & pre-registration required. $30 fee.

4

Basic Training for New Dads

www.innovishealth.com/ Services/WomensChildrens

This one-time evening class is designed for 'dads to be'. An experienced dad leads the class. Topics discussed include adjustments to fatherhood, what to expect from a newborn baby & how to support mom during this time. Class is from 6:30pm–8:00pm, register online.

6 & 14 Bird Brains

701.277.9240

www.redriverzoo.org

From chickens to eagles, and “Stan”, our crane, get ready to explore life in flight as we talk about the different birds found at the Red River Zoo. For ages 4–6 at 10:00am on the 6th or 2:00pm on the 14th.

7 & 8

Notching Up Success

701.241.5700

www.ag.ndsu.edu/ casscountyextension/ home-and-family

Notching Up Success with the Nurtured Heart Approach is for parents and professionals who are using the approach in daily practice. Featuring Lisa Bravo, MC, LPC, LISAC, NCC, founder of ParentWoRx Consulting, coauthor of Transforming the Difficult Child Workbook & proud mother of two wonderful teens. April 7th offers a FREE Parents Night, 7:00pm at the Ramada Plaza Suites & the 8th features a Full Day Professional Conference.

9 Parents’ Fair

http://childrens.sanfordhealth.org

Mark your calendars & join Sanford Health at the Hilton Garden Inn, Fargo for one of the region’s most valued events geared towards raising healthy kids.

14 Car Seat 101 for Expectant Parents

701.234.7233

www.north.sanford.org

Are your car seats installed correctly? Don't take the chance! This class is designed for expectant parents & focuses on infant car seats for newborns. Make an appointment to be at the Sanford Auditorium [801 Broadway N, Fargo] between 6:30pm–8:00pm. Space is limited. Pre-registration is necessary.

16

Paws to Read

701.241.1495

www.cityoffargo.com

Developing readers in grades K–6 can cuddle up & read to a certified reading therapy pet at the Main Library. Sessions are 15 minutes long & are scheduled from 1:00pm–3:00pm. Bring your own book or pick one from our collection. Space is limited; registration is required. To sign up, contact Children's Services.

19

Nighttime Easter Egg Hunt

Hunt for Easter eggs in the dark at Veterans Memorial Arena [1201 7th Ave E, West Fargo]! Kiddo [ages 2–8] can meet the Easter Bunny, decorate Easter eggs, take part in crafts, decorate a cookie & play on inflatable games 5:00pm–7:00pm. $3 per participant & concessions will be available for a minimal charge.

27

Kids Are Our Business Breakfast

701.293.7273

www.raccfm.com

Join the Rape and Abuse Crisis Center for breakfast at the Holiday Inn at 7:30am & help out a great cause. Seating is limited so call today! Cost: $65 individual tickets. Table & event sponsorships available. Pre-registration is encouraged.

30

March for Babies

701.235.5530

www.marchofdimes. com/northdakota

Join the March of Dimes at the Veterans Memorial Arena [1201 7th Ave E, West Fargo] for the March for Babies. Warm up begins at 9:00am with the march starting at 10:00am. The money raised will support lifesaving research, community services, education & advocacy that help babies get a healthy start.

—Dr Jaim Ginott

All event listings displayed within OTMOM are carefully selected to provide diverse options for families. It is always a good idea to call ahead to confirm the information provided. Although it is not possible to list every event happening in the FM area it is encouraged organizations submit events for consideration to info@onthemindsofmoms.com

children are like wet cement whatever falls on them makes an impression

Growing up in Jamestown, ND, Melinda Harr [40] was raised in the dental field environment

Although her father was an Orthodontist and sister a dental hygienist, Melinda initially veered away from the profession but knew staying in the health care field was something she was inspired to do She graduated from Jamestown College with a degree in Nursing and began working in Fargo as a Registered Nurse in the intensive care unit While Melinda respected the difficult yet rewarding parts of being a RN, she decided it wasn’t a good fit for her Seeing how much her sister enjoyed her career in dental hygiene, Melinda returned to school earning her Doctor of Dental Surgery degree and in 1999 established Melinda Harr Dental Helping people achieve a healthy, beautiful smile is what she finds most rewarding and she actively participates in local organizations such as Give Kids a Smile and Donated Dental Services When she isn’t putting a new smile on someone else’s face, she is enjoying one of her own while reading, lounging at the lake and spending time with her husband, Curtis, their two kids, Lauren [10] and Sam [8], and family and friends

photos: rialee photography | casie beldo

melinda harr dental

what makes a good dentist?

There are many things that need to come together: Good clinical skills, the latest technology, and staying current on the latest research in the dental field along with good people skills topping the list. Active listening and open communication are vital to ensuring that each individual receives the appropriate treatment. We try to provide information on the health of the teeth and what would be the best option for each specific situation, but the final decision is ultimately up to the patient.

how long has your dental practice been open?

mompreneurmelindaharr,dds

We have been seeing patients since 1999. Fargo has a great dental community and I was fortunate to start with such great local resources.

how many employees do you have?

We have nine team members.

what have you found to be the biggest challenge in owning your own business? Taking time off from work. I don’t like to be out of the office for very long and tend to worry about things when I am not there.

what is something essential to making your day run smoothly?

Being prepared. If you take the guess work out of projects, everything is easier. top 3 business mistakes you made and have learned from?

1. Trust your instincts—I have a habit of second guessing myself. I have learned that my first instinct is usually the correct one. If something doesn’t seem right, it probably isn’t.

2. Focus on what you enjoy—I love cosmetic dentistry. There are many areas of dentistry that are rewarding, but I just get excited about improving the appearance of a smile. There is

nothing more satisfying than seeing someone smile with confidence when they have been hiding their smile for years. It is amazing.

3. Have an outstanding team—Surround yourself with energetic and happy people. It will be one of the best things you can do for yourself and your business.

what part of your career are you most proud of?

Building my practice from the ground up. I was able to make decisions that would shape the practice into the kind of dental office that I would like to visit if I were the dental patient.

do you have any time management tricks that work well for you?

I used to think that the more things I could do at once, the more I was getting done. I am finding that if I focus on one project at a time, I am more effective than if I try to do too many things at once. We have a great team that is very good at making the day run smoothly for patients and for me. They are enthusiastic and well-trained at their jobs. Having superb people doing a great job makes all the difference in the world.

what mom sacrifices have you had to make for your profession?

Maternity leave was difficult to arrange. I only took about two weeks off from work; that was when the support system was so essential. If the kids are sick, [which thankfully isn’t very often] my husband Curt has the flexibility to take care of them. I can’t miss work without it affecting a lot of people, so his help makes a big difference. We really try to make the most of our evenings and weekends with the kids. They are growing up so fast that we want to do family activities whenever we can.

what advice do you have for the other momprenuers regarding staff management? Pick positive people for your team and your life will be much less complicated. There is nothing like a positive attitude—the rest you can teach.

why do some people underestimate the value of their teeth?

I think they don’t understand the importance of keeping the teeth in good condition. Research has linked poor dental health to systemic diseases such as cardiovascular disease and diabetes. Education is the key to changing values regarding teeth. We try to make certain that people have the facts about their oral health and understand potential consequences of not maintaining their teeth and gums properly. Excellent oral care and a beautiful smile will enhance your social life, help you chew for a lifetime and help maintain your overall health.

as a mom, how do you make time for yourself?

On the weekends I usually have a little time for something fun. Curt and I may go to a movie or out to eat. In the summer I go golfing with some friends after work. I am not very good, but it is fun!

people might be surprised to know that you are really good at what?

When painting a room, I can trim around windows, etc. with a very steady hand. I never use tape. It is the one home improvement that I can do better than my husband.

what is your biggest claim to fame?

When I was 23, I was on The Price is Right and won playing PLINKO. It was so much fun!!

what advice would you share with other women considering the mompreneur title? Make sure you will be doing something that you are passionate about. Don’t get so caught up in work that you forget to make time for the people you love—time goes by so fast when you are watching kids grow up. Being your own boss is very rewarding but also a challenge. Set up a good support system and go for it!

now, hear this

story by | dr. megan bolda

Did you know that 20% of children aged 12-19 already have permanent hearing loss due to noise exposure? That’s one in five! This statistic comes from a recent study [summer 2010] put out by the American Medical Association. Think of how that statistic would apply to your child or in your school. In school, children are encouraged to join band and orchestra. But they are not supplied with the proper hearing protection for these situations. Would we encourage our football players to play without a helmet?

In some classes, children are using computers and iPods to enhance the lessons in the classroom. Yet, teachers may not be able to monitor the sound output of these devices—capable of reaching up to 120 decibels [dB] and equivalent to a blast from a shotgun. This could result in instantaneous damage to the ears. Are children damaging their hearing on our watch?

life’s lessons

We teach kids to eat well, exercise, wear sunscreen, brush their teeth, keep clean, but are we teaching them to protect their hearing? Hearing is a sense that we cannot replace. Once hearing is damaged by noise, it is damaged for good. Of course, we use hearing aids to

help amplify situations, but it is not a perfect system. Also, the educational costs are staggering for these children with hearing loss.

cha-ching!

For one child with hearing loss, an average educational span would include:

• At least 30 hearing evaluations by the school audiologist

• New hearing aids every three years [usually handled by parents, aids are anywhere from $2,000-$5,000 per ear every three to five years]

• An FM system or sound field system, which is a hard-wired or wireless transmitting/ receiving device that transmits sound from the microphone directly to the listener, one every one to three years, plus repair costs and teacher in-service and training is estimated to cost between $15,000 and $30,000 across twelve years

• Individualized Education Programs [IEPs] with speech pathology, audiology, D/HH teachers and special education staff once a year

• Accommodations in the classroom and teacher in-service on any equipment used to help the child hear

photo: thuen design | scott thuen

• Decreased grades due to inability to hear, resulting in increased resources

• Anywhere between 25-50% of children with hearing loss will be held back a grade at least once

When we add all these costs together, they average out to a conservative estimate of $52,000 per student over the course of 12 years. This cost only includes the special accommodations. This is above and beyond the cost of educating a student with no special needs or requirements.

not always music to our ears

We also need to look at our music teachers. They are exposed all day, every day to dangerous levels of sound. We've all walked past a band room and wondered how they can tolerate the music being that loud! These teachers are in line for early retirement and disability due to hearing loss interfering with their ability to hear music. They can no longer teach children when they cannot hear what note they are playing.

We have all attended a concert or sports arena and left with our ears ringing and decreased hearing but hose symptoms are usually temporary. However, the damage is permanent. Over time, with repeated exposure, that ringing and decreased hearing becomes permanent. Imagine having to walk around all day and then try to sleep at night while hearing that high-pitched whine. All the while, missing out on important life sounds. Hearing loss can be devastating.

prevention is key

When we look at solutions, we’re talking prevention. You can use sound limiting headphones that cost $30 a pair and will last five-plus years. These limit sound output at 85 dB, no matter what the input is. This reduces the possibility of exposing children to dangerous noise levels. Eighty-five dB is considered the "safe zone" for protecting hearing.

You can use custom ear molds for children and adults that attach to any standard ear bud. They cost around $160 and will last for as long as you have them. They are made from vinyl or silicone, and come in any color or color combination that you can imagine—even glitter! The mold provides a firm seal on the ear canal, decreasing the amount of background noise that is heard. When the background noise is decreased, the iPod, MP3 or video game can be turned down to a safer

listening level. These molds also prevent the buds from falling out of the ears, increasing comfort as well as sound quality.

We should encourage use of custom musician’s molds for our music teachers. These cost between $180 and $200 per pair and will last for as long as they have them too. They are made of silicone or vinyl and maintain all the fidelity of the music, but filter it to a much softer level. Music teachers can then model good hearing health for their students. This will diminish the hazardous situations that our teachers face every day, allowing them to be more confident and comfortable teaching music for a longer career.

The solutions are so easy. Hearing loss from noise exposure is 100% preventable! We cannot change genetics, but we can prevent noise from being a factor in a hearing loss. As a school audiologist and clinical audiologist, it is my job and my passion [I have ear buds too!] to educate and help prevent dangerous listening situations to the best of my ability. Good hearing health is simple and fun. Hear life happen!

down the aisle

butternut squash mac and cheese

Who doesn’t like a plate of good old Mac and Cheese - it’s a quick meal option and a kid favorite. However, the nutrition value in a standard box of store bought Mac and Cheese is filled with many preservatives. Next time your family has a craving for some MC consider this nutrition-wise fresh option. The butternut squash does an admirable job of replacing the sodium loaded cream sauce and don't think this is just a “hide the vegetables” trick—the flavor is surprisingly complementary. The final dish is sweet in taste, the golden color of the squash makes the pasta look cheesier and with the broiled bread crumb topping it’s sure to become a consistent dish on the meal rotation.

prep time: 30 min

cook time: 40 min

serves: 8

calories: 325 per serving

photo: thuen design | scott thuen

you need:

• cooking spray

• parchment paper

• 1 pound macaroni [elbow or small shell work the best]

• 1 medium butternut squash*

• 2 tablespoons unsalted butter

• 2 tablespoons all-purpose flour

• 2 cups skim milk

• 1 [8 oz] bag of extra-sharp cheddar cheese

• 1 [8 oz] bag of monterey jack cheese

• 1 tablespoon salt

• 1 teaspoon powdered mustard

• 1/8 teaspoon nutmeg

• 1 teaspoon of black pepper

• 2 tablespoons grated parmesan cheese

• 2 tablespoons unseasoned bread crumbs

• 1 teaspoon olive oil

*Substitute for fresh squash: 2 [10 oz] packages frozen pureed squash or 2 cups baby food

how to:

1. Adjust oven rack to the middle position and heat oven to 425 degrees. Cut squash in half lengthwise, scoop out the seeds and lay the halves cut side down on a parchment-lined baking sheet. Bake for 25-35 minutes. Scoop 2 cups of flesh from the squash and mash with a fork or puree in a blender or food processor.

2. Cook macaroni until tender according to package directions. Drain and return to the pot.

3. Melt the butter in a medium saucepan over medium heat. Once the foaming subsides, add the flour and mustard. Whisk constantly for 1 minute, then gradually whisk in the milk. Bring the mixture to a simmer over medium heat, whisking frequently for 5–6 minutes, until the mixture has the consistency of heavy cream. Add the cheeses, salt, nutmeg, black pepper and squash, stirring until the cheese melts.

4. Preheat the oven to 375 degrees. Coat a 9 x 13-inch baking pan with cooking spray.

5. Combine macaroni and sauce in pot. Stir thoroughly. Pour mixture into baking pan. Combine bread crumbs, parmesan and oil in a small bowl. Sprinkle over the top of the macaroni mixture. Bake for 20 minutes. Then broil on low for 4 minutes so the top is crisp and nicely brown. Serve immediately.

source: crumblecookie.com and on the minds of moms magazine

The youngest of five siblings [four sisters and a brother] Patrick Murray grew up and graduated from West Fargo, ND As Clinical Informatics Specialist for Sanford Health, or “an IT guy”, Patrick gets the call when things aren’t working right or a new system or software is being implemented Patrick enjoys traveling, meeting new people for work and someday [when he has more time, money, and space] would love to restore an old car or truck with his boys, Gavin [5] and Hudson [2] Now making their home in north Fargo, Patrick and wife Mandie enjoy spending time outdoors with their boys and camping is a family favorite

a talent i wish i possessed... dancing. If I could dance my wife would get a kick out of that.

my fashion style could best be described as... a jeans and t-shirt type of guy. the day i would like to live over... to spend any day with my dad again. He passed away several years ago and I miss him.

an event in history most memorable to me... the birth days of my two sons.

the kid snack i am most likely to eat... the frosted coated animal crackers my wife buys for the kids. I’m a sucker for those. my wife and i always make time for... spending as much time with our kids as possible. my boys would say i'm a good dad because... they can relate to me and my interests; we have a lot of fun together.

the TV channel i am usually glued to... the History channel. the last time i grocery shopped... a few days ago. I go at least every week. I usually make the small trips for things we forgot or ran out of.

a family meal i have mastered... spaghetti.

if i could change anything about myself… I’d like to be less anxious about certain things. the section of the paper i always read first… the classified section. my beverage of choice… water. Sounds boring I know, but I drink a lot of it. the funniest person i know…

my son Gavin. Some of the things he does are hysterical, and remind me of myself when I was his age.

Dr. Jamie Englund

tiny sprout portraits

tiny sprout portraits

skyloft photography

rialee photography

skyloft photography

bugshutter

love story

story by | melissa uetz

HappyValentine's Day! Whether you are looking for love, locked into a relationship, or trying to escape one, Valentine's Day makes us reflect on the whole idea of love. While every love story is unique, I have a feeling that the life cycle of romance is a little more standard, and definitely not as lively, once we become Mommy and Daddy.

During a recent rare quiet moment at our house, I burst out laughing and said to my husband, “Do you realize how often we talk about poop?” Because we recently conquered the battle of potty training, my husband and I discuss poop...a lot. I said, “Did you ever think on our first date that ten years later we’d be having a conversation like this?” Then it dawned on me the only thing that has really changed is how we behave around each other. Familiarity breeds…something not as pretty.

On my first date with my husband, I put on my cutest outfit, made sure I shaved my legs, ordered the salad instead of the ribs, and overall behaved myself much more than normal. We dined by candlelight, we took a long walk, he caught fireflies, and we watched a thunderstorm roll in as we shared our first kiss. It was the stuff Lifetime Movies are made of. As soon as I was back at my place, I changed into my crappy jammies, ate a pint of ice cream, farted, and went to bed. I can only imagine what went on at his apartment.

I came to realize that parenting is a lot like dating. When I have a captive, yet short, audience, I am on my best

behavior. There is no more swearing at bad drivers [most of the time]; watching television shows with questionable moral appeal [before someone’s bedtime anyway]; or quoting Dane Cook, Family Guy, or South Park even when the situation is oh-so-perfect to do so. I have to eat my vegetables, sing the ABC's, and say please and thank you even when I really don't think it's deserved.

On the other hand, being a mommy is a lot like marriage. It's been so long since I've shaved my legs I could probably braid it...and no one has noticed. A shower has gone from a morning rite to a spa experience—on the days I actually get one. Dinners with candles and wine have turned into crowding around the twenty-piece McNugget trough, but as long someone remembered the sweet-n-sour sauce [thus somehow covering all the food groups], everyone is perfectly happy.

Many new relationships bring about big changes, including around the house. We all know baby-proofing your home is a major priority when there’s a little one crawling around. There are just certain things we don’t want junior accidentally finding. The same holds true when we’re breaking in a new boyfriend...and according to some of my friends, this remains true with husbands as well. I [and I suspect I’m not alone] had that dark, secret corner of the cabinet where I’d stash the Immodium, Midol, and Tampax before New Boyfriend came over. "What’s that? You need some Pepto? As the embodiment of pure femininity, I obviously do not have that on hand... where you can find it, anyway."

Based on personal experience, I’m pretty sure guys don’t have a secret stash area for when Current Girlfriend comes over. If they do, I’m betting it’s exactly the opposite of ours. If we hide our “yucky” stuff, they hide their “nice” stuff to get out when we come over...fancy stuff like napkins, hand soap, toilet paper actually on the spinny thing in the bathroom, and movies that do not involve blood or robots. On second thought, I don’t think guys plan this far ahead. I remember the first time I went to my now-husband’s apartment, I asked if I could have a glass of water. His response: “Yeah, just give me a minute to wash my cup.” Yes ladies, that’s singular on purpose. He dutifully washed his one glass so I could have a drink [of tap water, since his fridge had only beer, Mountain Dew, some other kind of beer, and a half empty bottle of Gatorade].

Now, as parents, we definitely have the secret stash area. Now, it’s for toys. Now, it’s anywhere that there’s space behind a door, curtain, or lid. And now, if friends come over who have kids and therefore are also members of the Creative Repositories by Active Parents [C.R.A.P.] club, we’re more likely to discuss “organization techniques”

what’s on your mind?

[which is really just fancy talk for junk stashing success stories] than actually breaking a sweat to clean it up before they get to our door.

But I can’t complain at all. Life is good, and the best part is knowing I get to spend the rest of it with my little man...and my big one, too. No matter what phase of the romance life cycle we may be in, we are so blessed to know we have that once-in-a-lifetime, happily-ever-after relationship. Especially now that we own more than one glass. I wonder what we’ll be laughing about in another ten years down the road. By then, we’ll be the parents of a teenager, and probably saying something like, “Remember when our biggest problem was where to put his toys? Ahh...the good ol’ days.”

Whether your kids are little or big, and whether your romance is newer or older, may you find yourself enjoying a warm, cozy, love-filled Valentine’s Day!

This section is dedicated to capturing your mom thoughts. Want to share what’s on your mind? Submit your article idea to info@onthemindsofmoms.com along with a short bio for consideration in an upcoming issue.

read all about it:

story by | dani parkos fluge

Every child can become an avid reader with guidance and the commitment to instill good reading habits; something any parent, teacher, family member, caregiver or friend can encourage.

Most parents realize that reading to kids is important—it's just not always easy to do. People are busy and it’s hard to find the time. Let’s face it, kids of all ages today are TOO BUSY—most kids have more activities than anyone could possibly handle and parents burn the candle at both ends [and in the middle] getting them there. When we do put forth effort it’s inevitable your child picks the same book over and over again and you feel like you’re going to go insane if you have to read it one more time. Despite our best intentions, it's easy to let the habit fall by the wayside.

photo: thuen design | scott thuen

book review – The Read-Aloud Handbook ~Jim Trelease

This is exactly why any person responsible for the developmental growth of a child, needs Jim Trelease's book.

The book ‘The Read-Aloud Handbook’ by Jim Trelease [author and parent] invites a new generation to discover the rewards and the importance of reading aloud to children at all ages. It’s a light read with an inspiring message sure to stop you in your tracks and catch you re-evaluate your own reading situation.

This book consists of ten chapters, the first two offer good reasons on WHY to read to children [developing language skills and imaginations, motivating the older ones to want to read to themselves], and lots of hints on HOW to start and keep up daily reading. Chapter three is especially helpful, describing the stages of reading aloud to children. Trelease follows children through their maturation process, suggesting specific reading strategies and kinds of books for different stages of maturity. Chapter four supplies a long list of things to do while reading aloud, followed by things not to do. Tips such as: read slowly, allow the child you’re reading with to interject their own story and narrative, don’t confuse quantity with quality [there is no time limit on reading] and whatever you do, never use books as a threat [“if you don’t pick up your room, no story tonight!”]. As soon as your child sees that you’ve turned the book into a weapon, they’ll change their attitude about books. Chapter five shows how to integrate and motivate kids to read silently and independently for pleasure. Despite all the research included in the book, nothing rings truer than real-life personal testimony from parents

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& teachers highlighted in chapter six. Chapter seven, eight and nine suggests ways to create reader-friendly home, classroom and library environments and shares valuable lessons from Oprah’s Book club, the Harry Potter books and the Internet.

But the heart and soul of the book is the giant up-to-date treasury of suggested readings for kids of different ages and interests. Trelease doesn’t just suggest books, but gives enough description of each book that tells you whether or not the book will be right for your child. Even better, he follows each review with a list of additional books that a child who liked that particular book will probably also enjoy. With this information there's no reason for any child to be without a nice big pile of books to explore.

In a nutshell whether you're an educator, new parent, parent of an older child who isn't interested in reading yet or even if you have teenagers, you need this book. Our goal for our children should not only be reading ability, but reading longevity. We shouldn't care if our children can read at age four—it's more important that they're still reading at age twenty-four. So if this book doesn't inspire you to remember your own favorite books, find the joy you felt when someone read to you, or motivate you to spend time reading with your children, nothing will.

It’s

choice.

Book Price: $15.00

photo: thuen design | scott thuen

story by | cheryl cullen

What is your definition of intuition? Most people have an obscure and limited understanding of this authentic and empowering resource. Those of you pondering an answer are coming from a range of perspectives.

You may have a general sense of what intuition is, but you don’t understand how to connect with it or why you would bother. Or, perhaps you consider it a meaningful and essential compass with which you navigate through life.

Whatever the case might be, there is room to grow your experience with intuition, and reap the rewards of this connection to a deeper place of knowing that resides within you. Intuition can serve you with inspiration, innovation, creativity, and direction when making decisions both simple and profound. We so often become stalled in a limited “black & white” tangible view of our potential. Exploring your world through an intuitive lens can offer you a full range of possibilities that will open you up to greater achievement and contribution.

For many, living intuitively provides a deeper spiritual connection to nature, angels, and loved ones, both living and those that have passed on.

you got it

Everyone has intuition; it’s a birthright. Throughout history, females have been credited with having stronger intuition than males. There is physiological science to support that the female brain can combine the logic of the left side and the right, intuitive side, more easily than males. It’s is also socially acceptable for women to use the term intuition when expressing non-linear thought processes.

A masculine expression of intuition may be referred to as a gut feeling or hunch. Call it what you will, it’s all the same thing. You’ll be hard pressed to find a highly successful person [by any measure] that doesn’t have a name for this sort of guidance, as well as a continued reliance on it.

Children have a freer experience with intuition as they don’t question their feelings with linear perspective or make judgments based on previous experience.

Consider, for a moment, animals. They are pure instinct. They do not check the weather forecast, or any other logical device to decide when to hibernate, migrate, hunt, or mate. They have an innate wisdom moving through them, and they act without reasoning. Humans have the same flow of wisdom available, but we miss out when we override it with logic or fear. Our pace of life can cause us to be “deaf” to it, or we simply don’t trust it to be legitimate. Instead, we navigate misguidedly allowing our fears, guilt, shame, doubt, and lack of self worth to chart our course. Or we may simply rely on logic alone to make decisions.

connecting & guiding

So what exactly is intuition? Here is one explanation for your consideration. Intuition is the voice of your soul. You are living a dual existence, as a human and as a soul. Human aspects include your physical body, ego, personality, and everything about you that is tangible,

visible, and finite. You’re also a soul. This aspect of you is intangible, invisible, and eternal. The soul is the essence of you that came from a Divine Source and will return to it when your physical body perishes. As you listen to and make choices based on the information and guidance your intuition provides, you are living in alignment with your soul!

The nature of the soul is to attempt to softly connect with and guide you throughout life, so you may fulfill a multitude of divinely ordained purposes. In order to experience intuition, you need to listen intentionally, because it’s mostly quiet and can be easily out muscled by much louder voices, such as your ego, other people’s opinions, as well as “internal noise” and the distractions of daily life.

Individuals who respect and honor their intuition tap it for inspiration, creativity and direction in all aspects of their lives. Although it does not necessarily insure a short-cut to “happy ever after”, intuition will lead you to the choices that will evolve your journey as your soul desires. Living life with a sense of connection to your soul is an immensely rich and rewarding experience indeed.

still logical

Living intuitively does not suggest you ignore logic. The goal is to strike a balance, factoring in common sense, experience, linear measure, and perhaps the opinions of others, along with intuition as you find your way in life.

When choices are made completely void of intuition they are often influenced by a combination of fear, pleasing others, avoiding assumed consequences, and the inner voice of self sabotage, [life coaches call it “the gremlin"]. If, instead, you consult your intuition, choices will emerge from your values, love, embracing possibility, your soul, and trust.

Living intuitively will change your life significantly. It’s a wise, inner resource, which aligns you with your life purpose, with your divinity. Although living intuitively can be a deeply spiritual experience, its purpose isn’t to replace religion. Any religious practice or ritual will enhance intuition.

Establishing a connection with intuition requires some knowledge and a willingness to begin. Your aptitude and confidence with it will grow, much like taking on a new skill or sport. When you're first learning to play

tennis you may feel discouraged, awkward, frustrated, and self-conscious. Yet, when you stay the course, you become more accomplished and find your rhythm. You trust your strokes, the connection is there, and it’s empowering. Then at a higher level of skill you trust yourself to find your way on the days your game is on, and even when it's flat.

As you live intuitively, your experiences will develop your skill set and fine-tune your instincts. You’ll find that meaningful connections, inspiration, and positive expectations are a natural part of life. Eventually it will become a reliable source of guidance and a natural nuance of your decision making process, as routine as checking the weather forecast before you decide what to wear.

coaching support

I am a life coach. Intuition is central to my trade. There is a saying in the life coaching industry that “Fulfillment is a radical act.” One does not wake up to the spontaneous occurrence of a fulfilling life. Fulfillment is a result of mindfully exploring your values and charting a course to align with, and honor them. By discovering what you value most and then setting goals to achieve desired results, you begin your journey toward living a meaningful, rewarding, and fulfilling life.

One of my roles is to help clients move into greater fulfillment in life. Intuition is a navigation system that supports their journey toward living authentically. Translating intuition into daily life doesn’t occur by following a precise scientific formula. Intuition is intangible and ethereal; it often leaves you to explore the shades of gray and to color in the meaning for yourself. This presents a challenge for a culture that predominantly regards tangible data as the only reliable source of information.

With each person there’s a unique emergence of intuition and the impact it has on their life. Following intuition’s lead often requires courage, and a life coach provides the support clients need when they’re stepping into both difficult decisions and exciting opportunities.

How do you learn more about intuition and how it can help you to live authentically? That would be the topic of future articles! As a life coach I mentor clients about intuition, and we explore the possible changes, challenges, and benefits they’ll experience as they learn how to utilize this enlightening inner resource.

Your family’s medical list can get crazy long these days—vaccinations, checkups, doctor visits, prescriptions. And what about you? Do your issues even make the list? Is there any time left for important things like—preventing heart disease?

Sweet tweet: You can do this! February is heart-health month, including “Go Red for Women,” the American Heart Association’s annual campaign to increase awareness of women’s heart disease. “Go Red” focuses on all women—including moms who don’t have a minute to spare.

Where to start? How about a frank conversation with another mom: Dr. Susan Farkas at Sanford Heart Center. With two grown kids and a 1-year-old granddaughter, she's also a board-certified cardiologist and an expert on women and heart disease. She's passionate about women’s awareness and action—especially women in their 20s and 30s.

“We now know heart disease starts very early,” says Dr. Farkas. “You have a far better chance of preventing heart disease if you start young rather than waiting until your 40s and 50s.”

She's seen the bad results when women don't know their risk and don't take care of themselves.

Women have even more reason not to smoke: Research shows smoking damages women more than men. No one knows why, but the message is clear: Don’t smoke and don’t let your kids be around anyone who does. Secondhand smoke kills, too.

2. choose the good Or as Dr. Farkas says, “Clean, healthy living.” She spells it out:

• A nutritious diet full of fruits and veggies. If your cupboards have foods with long lists of ingredients you can’t even pronounce, you might want to rethink putting that in your mouth—or your kids’ mouths. “Simple is better,” she says. “Simple ingredients. Simple seasonings. The foods your grandmother—or great grandmother—could easily get.”

• Maintaining a healthy weight

• Start tracking cholesterol level and blood pressure at age 20

3. ditch the stress “Reducing stress clearly has heart-health benefits,” says Dr. Farkas. “And one of the best ways is through exercise." Exercise helps your blood pressure, heart rate, blood sugar and stress hormones. Can't find the time? Get support from other moms! "Whether we’re running together to get ready for a marathon or rotating child care so we can go to exercise class, we need to take

straight your heart

“They keep putting others first and their health suffers,” says Dr. Farkas. “When it comes to heart-health, we need to put ourselves first. Our families will benefit, plus our kids will learn from the example we set. They’ll take our heart-health lessons with them for the rest of their lives.”

three smart steps

1. no smoking…period! “Not smoking is the numberone thing you can do to prevent heart disease,” says Dr. Farkas. “Everything else comes second.”

advantage of helping each other,” says Dr. Farkas. “It releases stress, it’s great for our hearts and it creates happiness.”

connect!

Your primary care doctor is a good resource in helping you prevent heart disease and assessing your risk, including a closer look at your family history. And for heart problems? Call Sanford Heart Center: 701.234.2371.

talk:

photo: otmom | dani parkos fluge

lessonsunplanned kristi gellner

story by | roxane salonen

By third grade, an energetic, blonde girl named Kristi already had begun overlooking probability.

What were the odds, after all, that Rod Gellner, that cute boy she’d known since kindergarten in Langdon, North Dakota, would end up being her husband?

“I just knew I was going to marry him someday,” she said, a knowing glimmer in her eye as if she were eight all over again.

In 1999, the couple married, thus beginning a journey never anticipated; a journey that began with two microscopic genes they both possessed. A journey that would include unexpected challenges, and loads of love and determination to overcome them. Soon there would be only lessons to teach and lessons to be learned.

photos: rialee photography | ria czichotzki

lessons unplanned

all in the attitude

From her earliest years, Kristi had been preparing for her life’s journey, honing the tools that would help her traverse life’s twists and turns. Her attitude was relentlessly positive, according to her mother, Gaylene, a self-admitted Worry Wart. “One time she made me a cross-stitched picture that said something like, "Worry is like a Rocking Chair...It gives you something to do, but it doesn't get you anywhere."

Such was Kristi’s approach to life then, as now.

“One of my favorite quotes is by Abraham Lincoln: ‘A person is about as happy as they make their minds up to be,’” Kristi said. “I actually have a picture with that saying on it hanging up in my house and if I ever start to feel overwhelmed, I just look at that and think, ‘It’s so true.’”

Even her husband, Rod, can’t remember a day his wife wasn’t encouraging others. “She makes every day better when you’re with her,” he said. “A lot of people like having her around. I’m lucky enough to get that every day of my life.”

Kristi’s good friend Jessie Aamodt is quick to concur. “Kristi faces everything with a big smile,” she said. “That really rubs off on people. I know she’s pretty significantly influenced me that way...and nothing slows her down.”

In the last seven years, that positive attitude has carried not only Kristi but the entire family through some of the most challenging moments of their lives.

In September of 2003, Kristi’s and Rod’s oldest child, Jack, was diagnosed with Spinal Muscular Atrophy [SMA], a degenerative disease that has required annual visits to specialists, bulky equipment to help Jack stand and gain strength, and other medical devices and routines that have become a part of the family’s everyday life. Though the disease has been slowed through a special drug, it is not reversible and can be life threatening.

a mom knows

The journey into parenting began normally enough for the young couple then living in Rochester, MN, where Kristi was an elementary teacher and Rod, a registered nurse. Kristi’s pregnancy had gone well, and as an infant, Jack was on track developmentally. “When he was 3 months old, Jack was on target with everything.

He rolled over at four months and was cruising all over in his walker,” Kristi recalled. “Everyone was predicting he’d walk early.”

But not long before his one-year check-up, Jack was standing by a coffee table when Kristi saw his knees buckle. Though she passed it off as simple loss of balance, the scene repeated itself several times over the next weeks. Kristi also noticed Jack only crawling on his belly, and one day when she went to get him from his crib, she found him with his chin caught on the bar nearly choking, as if he’d fallen and couldn’t raise himself up.

When Kristi raised her concerns with their doctor, he suggested she was an overly worried first-time mom, and Jack, a bit lazy.

Though Jack managed to standard-crawl once, Kristi said, she couldn’t get over the nagging feeling that something still wasn’t quite right. So they started him on physical therapy with hopes for progression. The effect was minimal.

When Jack turned 15-months-old, Kristi again voiced her concerns to their physician. “He still wasn’t really concerned but suggested an appointment with a neurologist,” Kristi said. “Just then, Jack reached for a toy and plopped right over, and the doctor said, ‘Okay, that is not normal.’ And I said, ‘This is what I’m trying to tell you; this happens all the time!’”

With that, the neurology appointment was scheduled, and weeks of muscular disease tests and question marks followed. As the Gellners waited for test results over the Labor Day weekend, the annual Jerry Lewis telethon was in full swing. Kristi told herself she was not going to watch any part of the fundraiser. Fearing Jack might have Muscular Dystrophy, she thought it would be too emotional.

But on the last day of the telethon, something prompted her to tune in. At that moment she heard the announcer say, “And now a word from the SMA Association.”

They showed a young girl with SMA getting up from a sitting position, which appeared all too familiar to Kristi. “I was just like, ‘Oh my goodness!’ and I thought, ‘That’s just how Jack does it,’” she said. “I told Rod, ‘Look at this; this is what he has!’”

Her intuition had not failed; Jack was diagnosed with SMA.

kristi and rod didn’t even let jack see the classroom beforehand, so his first day of school really was a first

teaching from home

Around the same time as Jack’s diagnosis, Rod accepted a position with the Veterans Administration Hospital in Fargo, and within the month, the Gellners had sold one home, bought another, and were on their way to settling back in North Dakota. “It was crazy. The baby had just been diagnosed with SMA, and it was like, ‘We’re out of here!’” Kristi said with a laugh. “I still remember how it felt—like we were coming home.”

Kristi had always loved kids and dreamed of staying home with her own but never imagined it would come to pass. But with Jack’s diagnosis, and the vulnerability of SMA children to respiratory infection, the deal was sealed. To reduce Jack’s probability of getting sick,

Kristi would take her teaching expertise and apply it as a home-schooling mother.

“The Academy for Excellence,” as the family calls it, involves Kristi’s 3-year-old niece, Nora, as well as Jack [8], his sister Rose [5], and baby brother Howard [1]

Wanting an authentic schooling experience for their children, Kristi and Rod transformed their basement into a classroom. “It looks like an actual classroom, not at all like the kitchen table kind of home school,” Rod proudly explained.

In fact, in preparation for kindergarten, Kristi and Rod didn’t even let Jack see the classroom beforehand, so his first day of school really was a first. “When he came

into the room, I said, ‘Well, welcome to school!’” Kristi recounted with her arms open. But Jack was bothered by one thing. What should he call his new teacher? After tossing around a few possibilities, they finally came around to Jack’s idea of “Ms. Mommy.”

Kristi gets a kick out of the fact that the Jack and Rosie will share things with Ms. Mommy they never would indulge to her alter-ego, Mom, including details of the previous weekend on Mondays. “It does help because I really have to see Jack as a kid in a classroom, and not just my own child,” she said.

The Academy also has sharing days, daily recess, and field trips to the library and other places of educational

interest in warmer months. Though they plan for the kids to go to traditional school someday, home-schooling has been a win-win, and Kristi’s thrilled to be home. “I’m doing everything I’ve ever wanted to,” she said.

Jessie never ceases to be amazed by her friend’s creative abilities and the passion with which she approaches projects like birthday parties, Halloween parties and other events within the Gellner home. “We were invited to Jack’s kindergarten graduation and everybody dressed up. There were little folding chairs and an aisle down the center,” she said. “Jack had on a cap and gown and met us with the program in hand, just like my son had had at his.”

But Jessie questions whether Kristi was born with the positivity gene. “I think she chooses to have that good attitude. It just seems like she decided, somewhere down the line, to be happy and do whatever it took to be that.”

lessons taught

Despite Kristi’s great attitude, painting the Gellners’ lives as perfect would be unfair. The greater part of 2009, they spent every other month in the Intensive Care Unit due to Jack’s ongoing illnesses. They carry the burden of their inability to be as interactive with extended family and friends as they’d like, especially during the cold and flu season. And several times a day, Jack must do stretching exercises. He also routinely deals with what the family calls “the cough machine” to keep his lungs strong, and has had his share of masks, inhalers and braces.

Furthermore, development of scoliosis is an ongoing concern. To prevent it and keep his bones strong and his insides healthy, Jack free-stands with the help of a back shell for three hours a day, with rarely a complaint. “He’s such a great kid,” Kristi said.

Every once in a while, Jack will come up with a random SMA-related question, such as: “Will I ever walk?” “He was about three when he said that,” Kristi recalled. “I said, ‘Well, we don’t know if you will but we can always hope that you will.’”

Another time, when Jack probed even further, Kristi turned her answer into a biology lesson, explaining

that Jack was given genes from his parents, who’d each passed on one gene that prevents his body from making enough protein; the kind that fires and moves muscles. Unsatisfied with biology alone, Jack asked, “So, do you think God just forgot?”

After only minimal hesitation, Kristi responded, “No. I think God knew exactly what he was doing. He looked at you and said, ‘This is the kid! He can handle it, he doesn’t need the gene.’ He knew you were going to be able to handle it and do all the good things you can with what you have.”

Kristi’s optimism regarding Jack’s condition isn’t just wishful thinking; it’s based on reality. Yes, he was born with a genetic disease, but it’s Type 2 rather than the more limiting Type 1 variety, which leads to death before age two in about half the occurrences. And those with Type 2 can sit upright, unlike Type 1. While SMA doesn’t affect cognitive ability, some Type 1 kids don’t have enough strength in their facial muscles to smile, whereas Jack smiles as widely as the next child, perhaps more so.

the jack attack and beyond

To help give Jack and others with SMA hope, every year the Gellners organize and carry out “The Jack Attack,” a 5K walk-run to benefit SMA research. The event attracts around 200 participants and over the past six years has raised more than $100,000.

Additionally, Kristi’s always ready to share what she’s learned with other families facing a similar diagnosis, including what’s become a given to her: “You have to stay positive. It’s definitely okay to be upset about it, to be sad about it, but my thing from the get-go was that we are not going to cry, be sad and walk around feeling sorry for ourselves because that’s not going to help anyone, so we need to count on one another.”

Kristi said it’s important to gather up as much solid information as possible as well as be proactive and confident you’re doing your best. “It might not be as much as someone else is doing but do what you are able to do,” she said.

Support through organizations like Families of SMA (FSMA) have been immeasurable for the Gellners as well, and through Jack’s involvement in programs like Hope, Inc., he’s been able to actively participate in sports and considers himself a good athlete. In fact, limitations are minimal, if not nonexistent, in the Gellner household.

“I’ve told him, ‘If you ever feel like there’s something you’re missing out on, tell us and we’ll find a way to do it,’” Kristi said determinedly.

Lastly, frequent, honest communication between parents is a must. “Rod is like my rock. If it’s been a hard day, he’ll take over,” she said.

Though he works two jobs to ensure Kristi can stay at home, Rod gives his wife all the credit for keeping the family moving in a positive direction. “I don’t see it as a burden,” he said. “And sometimes when I go to work on Monday, I realize that’s my easiest day. She does a wonderful job. It would be hard to be the mother and teacher and everything else for your children.”

He also admires the way she spreads her energy around, tirelessly seeing to it that each child has his or her needs met. “She’s does a fantastic job,” he said. “Our kids are very lucky and I’m a lucky guy.”

lessons learned

Early on in their journey, Kristi read an article that has stayed with her ever since. It was written by a gal in her

20s who shared how devastated she was as a child to know her SMA had caused sadness within her parents. In her young mind, she felt responsible. “When I read that,” Kristi said, “I was like, ‘Oh, we will never make Jack feel like that, ever!’”

After the 2006 Jack Attack, the Gellners discussed the importance of the event on their drive home. Kristi explained to then 4-year-old Jack how when people come to The Jack Attack they raise money and the Gellners are then able to give it to researchers and doctors who are trying to find "medicine" to help kids with SMA become stronger. "So maybe kids with SMA could do more things like have stronger hands, crawl, stand on their own or maybe even walk...who knows?" she explained.

Jack listened intently then replied, "Yeah, but Mommy, you know it's okay if I don't ever walk.  I like my wheels... you know they are just kind of part me. That's just kind of Jack.”

And with that, there are only lessons taught and lessons learned.

photo: thuen design | scott thuen

ready, set

grow

is this normal?

story by | sheri kleinsasser stockmoe

Our #1 priority is keeping our kids healthy and happy, but we also don’t want to be known as the crazy mom that brings her kid to the doctor for every cough and scratch fearing the worst. It’s important to remember that you’re the mom and you’ve been given this gift of the “gut feeling”, so don’t underestimate it.

When my oldest was just a few weeks old, I got some great advice from a close friend and seasoned mom veteran [thanks Tracey]. She told me, “Trust yourself. Anytime I have really felt like there was something wrong with my kids, I’ve been right.” Good advice and here’s some info on common kiddo struggles and when a trip to the doc is warranted, but remember…trust yourself…you know your kiddo best.

wee ones

You’ve read the books. You’ve stocked the pantry with mashed peas, peaches and rice cereal. You know this is the time you are supposed to start introducing solid foods. Do you know what to do if your wee one seems to want nothing to do with the spoon?

not hungry?

The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends starting solid foods at six months. But, as early as four months your wee one may show signs of transitioning

readiness. Those signs include having head control, sitting well, losing extrusion reflex [tongue pushing food out], display chewing motions, significant weight gain, growing appetite and an interest in what’s going from your plate to your mouth.

Yes, getting accustomed to solid foods and eating from a spoon might take some time. This form of eating offers new flavors as well as textures never experienced before and not all wee ones are ready at the recommended time. It might take three to four times before your wee one will give the new food a try. Or you might just need to wait a couple weeks and try again. That is normal, but it’s important you don’t force the issue. If your wee one continues to refuse solid foods and he is doing any of the following, it’s a good idea to see your doctor:

• he’s not gaining weight

• he’s not developing normally

• he coughs, chokes, gags or vomits during feedings

If your wee one is thriving, meaning he is gaining weight and developing normally, it is completely reasonable to slow things down and wait a month or two to start introducing solids again. Most wee ones will take enough of what they need to stay healthy as initially he will still be bottle or breastfeeding. But if your wee one still refuses food or seems to have trouble swallowing, see your doctor and get things checked out.

as many as 50% of 4-24-month-olds are described as picky eaters by their parents

Sure, you want time to slow down just a little bit and keep that little baby boy around longer. But let’s be honest, when it comes to diaper duty, the sooner you get that tot potty trained, the better! you want me to what?

So, what if he just isn’t getting it? He’s old enough. You’re doing what you’re supposed to do. He’s displaying the signs of potty training readiness:

• imitates going potty like a big kid

• verbally communicates other sensations like being hungry

• understands simple requests, such as "go get the blanket"

• begins to pull diaper off when dirty, or comes to tell you he's dirty

• able to pull clothes on & off

• stays dry for longer stretches [3-4 hours]

But he still doesn’t get it. Now what?

• back off He just might not be ready yet, so let him know that when he is ready to be a big boy the potty is ready and waiting.

• bad timing Trying to potty train during a stressful time or time of change [moving to a new house or bringing home a new baby] is a recipe for resistance.

• change it up The potty training trick that worked like a charm with your oldest might not phase your current tot. Be ready to change up your approach.

a real problem

Most potty training struggles are only temporary, but there can be medical reasons for your tot’s resistance to potty training:

• pain with urination

• wetting during laughter or while running to the toilet

• constantly damp underwear

• chronic diarrhea or constipation

Many times potty training resistance is simply a power struggle. If he can postpone number one or number two or hides while doing it, it’s a good sign there isn’t a medical reason for his delay in potting training. But if your tot displays pain or is trying very hard to use the potty without success, visit your doctor to rule out any physical ailments.

anxiety-based school refusal affects 2-5% of school-age kiddos

It’sunderstandable that your preschooler is going to have times when they don’t want you to leave. Gosh, they just love you and want to be with you! Peeling a preschooler off your leg is well, heart breaking. please don’t go

Separation anxiety is common in early months of childhood [eight to fourteen months typically], but it isn’t out of the ordinary for a preschooler to experience it too. It might come out of the blue or maybe there is a change in their environment [new daycare, preschool

or the family has moved] or they are worried about life at home [mom and dad fighting or someone is sick]. If you are confident the environment you are leaving your preschooler in is safe and he is simply experience separation anxiety, here are some tips to make your get away:

• short & sweet Keep your goodbyes quick and establish a routine. The longer you hang around, the more anxious you will get, which will feed your preschooler's anxiety.

• you go, he stay Send clear messages that you expect him to stay. Don’t cave and take him home. This will only reinforce the behavior.

• be upbeat Don’t get upset. Having a positive attitude toward the people and environment you are leaving your preschooler in lets him know this place is safe and he can have fun here.

• your turn Let another family member do the drop and see if the problem remains.

Don’t be surprised if you think you have licked the problem and it rears its ugly head again. That is normal, but if it interferes with normal life activities and it intensifies over time, it may be a sign of separation anxiety disorder [SAD]. Signs of SAD may include:

• refusal to go to school for weeks

• constant complaints of physical sickness

• refusal to sleep alone

• excessive distress with even the thought of separation

• excessive worry about the safety of himself, a family member or being lost

• age-inappropriate clinginess or tantrums

The symptoms of SAD can be associated with other conditions or psychiatric problems. Consult with your doctor if you feel your preschooler’s situation could be more than separation anxiety.

It’s reasonable for our big kid to be scared of things. Their imaginations make them prime candidates for scary dreams. But when are scary dreams something to be concerned about?

really scared

It’s not uncommon for big kids to suffer from nightmares or night terrors. Nightmares usually occur in the later hours of sleep. He wakes up scared or upset, but you are able to comfort him and he will usually be able to remember at least parts of the nightmare.

Night terrors typically occur about two or three hours after falling asleep. Your big kid will wake suddenly and may yell or scream in distress. Unlike nightmares, he will not be able to be comforted and he will have no memory of it the next morning.

A number of factors can cause these sleep disorders, such as being sick or overtired, stress, anxiety or medications. You can do your part to prevent them by having a healthy sleep routine, cutting the caffeine and no scary TV before bed. In the case of nightmares, talk to your big kid about what is scaring him and help him find ways to cope with the fear.

Most cases of nightmares and night terrors do not require medical treatment, but if you notice any of the following signs, there could be a more serious condition:

• snoring or any problem breathing while sleeping

Night terrors can be a sign of obstructive sleep apnea, which is a medical condition involving repeated stoppages in breathing while sleeping and can then disrupt deep, slow-wave sleep.

• drooling, jerking, or stiffening Although relatively rare, these movements after a night terror may be a sign of nocturnal seizures.

• increased frequency Nightmares or night terrors could worsen or occur more often or even more than once a night.

• longer than 30 minutes Your big kid should calm down and return to sleep shortly after the night terror starts.

• dangerous behavior during an episode Some children may sleep walk during a night terror and it’s important to monitor any behavior that may be dangerous.

about 15% of kiddos between 5 & 12-years-old have at least 1 episode of sleepwalking

tweener has a number of things to be stressed about as they begin this transition from little kid to young adult. It’s important to indentify a stressed out tweener and equip them with skills to combat stress. Because stress is one thing there is always enough of!

stress for everyone

Stress can affect anyone [of any age] and it is very subjective as well. For you, stress is associated with the pile of laundry, work, unpaid bills and grocery shopping.

For your tweener, stress is about tests, activities, how they look or who their friends are. Different stressors, but all are significant. It’s important you are empathetic to your tweener’s stressors. Some signs of stress can appear as sleeping issues, mood swings, nervousness, a drop in grades or feeling constantly pressured.

use both ears

If you see your tweener getting stressed out, start by talking and LISTENING. And by that I mean you talk 10 percent of the time and listen the other 90 percent. Too often as moms we want to “fix” the problem and your tweener needs you to hear what is bothering him and you need to show you are concerned by listening intently. Then, together, take a look at helping relieve his stress:

• schedule revamp Being overscheduled can be a huge stressor. Consider possibly cutting something if needed.

• goal achiever Being an overachiever can create a lot of stress. Help your tweener set realistic goals and establish a game plan to reach them.

• attitude check Help your tweener stay positive and make sure you are modeling a positive outlook and optimistic point of view.

• healthy living Getting a good night’s sleep, eating healthy and exercising are beneficial on many levels.

• relax Help your tweener find ways to release stress positively. Listening to music, exercising, deep breathing, whatever works for him to calm himself and let go of the stress.

Not addressing tweener stress can lead to more serious problems such as anxiety, depression, panic attacks, low self-esteem or drug and alcohol abuse. Visit your doctor is your tweener’s struggle with stress worsens.

in a 2009 study, 26% of 8-12-year-olds said that they were more worried than the previous year, but only 17% of parents thought that their kiddo's stress had increased

Thelife of being a teen can be hard. As parents, we anticipate some highs and lows. It is very important we don’t ignore the signs of depression and pass it off as normal teen mood swings. Depression is very serious and you can help.

more than sad Depression is much more than just being down in the dumps. Despair, hopelessness, sadness, discouragement and anger describe depression. Depression is treatable, but it is estimated that only 20 percent of teens receive help. While adults are able to seek out treatment for depression, your teen is still a kid and he depends on you to be his caregiver and advocate.

So what is “normal” teen behavior and when should you turn to a professional? The teen years can have a lot of drama. From parental conflict to puberty to just fitting in. Here are some things to consider:

• sadness, guilt or hopelessness Your teen seems sad or cries frequently for no apparent reason. He feels worthless or may show a disinterest in his future.

• irritability, anger or hostility Depression doesn’t always appear as sadness, especially in teens. Angry outburst can be common.

• withdrawal from friends & family Adults will tend to withdraw from everyone when depressed, but teens typically don’t completely withdraw from everyone. They may socialize less than before or start hanging out with a different crowd.

• loss of interest in activities Things that were once important, now aren’t.

• changes in eating & sleeping habits Your teen may show a marked weight gain or loss, too much or too little interest in food or have difficulty getting to sleep or waking up

• unexplained aches & pains Depressed teens will often complain of physical pains such as headaches

or stomachaches when there is no physical reason for the pain.

• fatigue, lack of energy or difficulty concentrating Your teen is unable to complete the simplest of tasks.

• thoughts of death or suicide If your teen makes statements related to death or suicide, ALWAYS take them seriously!

Yes, being a teen can be challenging, but if you see dramatic changes in your teen’s behavior or personality or notice signs of depression for a extended period of time, trust your instincts and see your trusted physician.

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Who is Sally?

She is our quintessential, “do-it-all” mom and friend who reminds us to remember the woman behind the mom.

rework that resolution

story by | deb uglem

January is the time of new beginnings. Think about how you felt leading up to January 1, 2011. In my mind it goes like this…

The buzz of the holidays calms down. Lists are generated and daily declarations start:

“I can’t wait until January One!”

“I can’t believe how motivated I am this year!”

“Nothing is stopping me!”

I amaze myself with the number of resolutions I will conquer. Sugarplum visions are replaced by the thought of organized cupboards and a clean house. The smell of cookies is taken over by the smell of the gym bag that I will use at least four times a week. Oh, the power I feel when I am thinking of the challenges. Wow—this is my year!

I wish I could bottle the feeling I have from January 1st to [well counting this year, which is one of my better years] January 10th. The 10th was my husband’s birthday …at that moment I think you would have agreed that pizza was a good idea too! There goes that low-carb resolution. Oops!

Now we are on to the reality of February. This is when you realize things aren’t working out like you once hoped.

The positive thoughts that filled your head in January have a different tune completely…

“Oh you mean you have to actually go to the gym you joined in order to lose weight? I wish they would have mentioned that at fitness orientation.”

“What do you mean cereal doesn’t count as a gourmet dinner for a family?”

“I don’t think that a clean kitchen even includes the panty anyway; no way anyone can keep that monster under control!”

And in my defense I had simply forgotten about half of my “amazing” initial resolutions. This is generally how mine and I am willing to bet a high percentage of other mom’s first quarter of the year plays out—a lot of resolutions not a lot of results.

Time to rework your resolution! Time to learn from your past and look positively into the New Year. Resolution is defined as a commitment that an individual makes to a personal goal, project, or the reforming of a habit. This lifestyle change is generally interpreted as advantageous. It sounds great, easy and exciting. Pick something you want to change and do it! I suggest you rework the idea of resolutions. Let yourself off the hook, make your resolutions manageable but effective and don’t forget about YOU!

Let yourself off the hook. Most resolutions start out strong. Going to the gym the first week almost feels easy.

You are feeling great and motivated. Week two starts a little different. You’re a little sore and only two days of workout happen because you think your family would really appreciate clean socks and underwear—laundry wins. Instead of focusing on the feeling of failure celebrate the two great workouts you had that week and the fact that you actually know your kids are wearing clean socks! Don’t give up on your goal because one week didn’t go actually according to plan. Make sure you understand that life can be worked into your resolution and sometimes compromise is a must.

Some resolutions tend to be too courageous. They become more of a stress in your life instead of an improvement in the way you are living. Make your resolutions into manageable goals. The transition is easy if you break it down. Take the gym for example. Telling yourself that you are going to work out everyday for a year is a huge undertaking. Instead vow to make February your healthiest month yet. This can include the gym of course, but also a walk, a new healthy recipe for your family, drinking more water or more nightly sleep. Be creative with your short-term resolutions and set new ones throughout the

year. Changing little things in your daily routines can have a huge impact. You will be happy with the results. Your manageable goals will become habits and they will build on each other throughout the year.

As a mom our resolutions typically focus on others, mainly our family. We set goals that we believe will help our family feel better and live better. It is time to think about YOU! Don’t be afraid to want something for yourself. Take time for self-improvement. You may want to browse a bookstore once a month [or weekly!] for life changing ideas or for the quiet. Allow yourself your time to regroup and get energized. Maybe this is the year you start that business, visit that college friend or learn something new. Taking time for yourself is hard and sometimes that means that the pantry isn’t as organized as you hope. Don’t worry! Your family will appreciate your attitude and happiness when you are taking time for you.

If you have lost sight of your resolutions for the year, rework them! Don’t be discouraged because it is February or March or…well you get the picture. It is never too late or too early. Your New Year can start today!

without condition Love

photo: rialee photography | ria czichotzki

On the go

Most days, they’re pretty hard to keep up with. They’ve got energy and are constantly on the go. You hate to see an injury slow them down, whether in the backyard or out on the ice. Sanford Orthopedics & Sports Medicine offers experts in pediatric care so growing bones, joints and muscles heal correctly. Making sure an early injury doesn’t cause problems down the road.

Ask for a referral or call:

Sanford Orthopedics & Sports Medicine (701) 237-9712

Sanford Southpointe Orthopedics (701) 234-8800

orthosports.sanfordhealth.org