NEW IN FASHION
Leather, suede, corduroy and fringe bring texture to 2025
Turn the
PAGE
Create the life you’ll love; MLK parade unites all; memoirs with Susan Lewis; beyond the scale; freedom from alcohol; Pensacola Opera dazzles; letting go with Sandra Gary Winborne; Australia & New Zealand
NEW YEAR
Happy New Year! I’m glad to find you here, reading the first Bella of 2025. Are you ready to turn the page on a wealth of possibilities? I am.
When we first started brainstorming about this month’s theme, I inevitably thought about books and how I love to turn that first page and jump into a new story. We are just like books, you know. All the chapters of our lives fall out in unpredictable ways, and we find ourselves not only the main characters of a million different stories, but also, just like the best dynamic characters in fiction, growing and changing along the way until we might find our characters unrecognizable from who we were when we began.
That’s a good thing, friends.
I certainly am not the same person I was at 20, or 30, or 40. Heck, I’m not exactly the same character in my professional roles or with my own family or friends. And I promise everyone is grateful for that.
So, what have we learned along the way, and where do we want to go? I have learned that I need something new to do to spark curiosity and joy and passion every so often. I like to learn new skills, meet new people, try new jobs, travel to new places.
I have a few goals for this new year, not resolutions — I hate the pressure of those — but I definitely have goals of new ways to stretch myself both mentally and physically. And I hope to enlist the help of a few friends to hold me accountable along the way.
Whatever your wishes for 2025 are, I think you’ll find some great inspiration here in Bella to ignite your excitement. Whether it’s trying out a new fashion trend, making a bold life move or shifting your perspective away from the scale and toward your overall health, you have lots of content in these pages to get you motivated.
Cheers to you and cheers to all that 2025 has to offer. Now turn the page and start living it!
— Lisa Player from the editor
Do you enjoy Bella? Would you like to share your thoughts? Feel free to reach out to me anytime at lisa@bellamagazine.com.
Liz Biggs, Alice Crann Good, Sharla Gorder, Allison McCrory, Chelsea Owens, Lisa Player, Cynthia Reeves, Leah Seacrest, Sonshine, Magi Thomley Williams
Harrison, Magi Thomley Williams
staff
Liz Biggs, writer/columnist
Liz Biggs is a Pensacola native and mother of four. Once upon a time, she had a high-pressure career, but now she has a pension and is a freelance writer for Bella Magazine. Liz enjoys music, dancing, tennis and travel and tries to find humor in everything.
Alice Crann Good, writer
Award-winning writer Alice Crann Good spent 20 years with USA TODAY and Pensacola News Journal; accolades include the Scripps Howard Foundation National Journalism Award. She was also a state college PR specialist and is author of Betsy the Bookworm children’s book series.
Sharla Gorder, writer/columnist
Sharla Dawn Gorder is a Pensacola Beach resident and columnist for the Island Times newspaper. She is the author of “My Vices Collide; a Celebration of Being a Little Messed Up,” and her latest book, entitled “Crayon Dawn,” published October 2024.
Jennifer Harrison, advertising
Jennifer Harrison is a Pensacola native (via the Navy). She is very involved in the Pensacola community through IMPACT 100, Pensacola Navy Days, Food Distributions for Representative Salzman, Leadership Pensacola, ECPS Foundation, Achieve Escambia, ECCPTA and more. Making an impact is what drives her to do more.
Allison McCrory, writer/fashion stylist
Allison McCrory is almost a Pensacola native who has worked in writing and editing since 1984 when she started with The News, an afternoon newspaper that later merged with the morning Journal. The mom of two adult kids, Allison suffers from a tennis addiction, practices yoga and loves to cook.
Elizabeth Meyer, art director
Elizabeth Meyer spent her early career as a designer and design director at newspapers across the country. She is currently an adjunct instructor and director of The McKinley Avenue Agency at Ball State University. Betsy was born in Pensacola while her father was in the U.S. Navy.
Chelsea Owens, writer
Chelsea Owens grew up in Gulf Breeze and received degrees in communications and art from the University of West Florida. She has a lifelong passion for style and art, and over 10 years of social media and marketing experience. She is also a pilates instructor who enjoys both staying busy and relaxing at the beach.
Cynthia Reeves, writer
Long-time writer Cynthia Reeves spent 25 years as a broadcast journalist across the southeast, including 10 years as a news reporter at WEAR-TV in Pensacola. As a high school teacher of journalism, TV production and English, she passed her skills down to young writers. She also served several years as District 1 director for the Florida Scholastic Press Association.
Justine Roper, writer
Justine Roper is a doctor of physical therapy, personal trainer, and speaker from Pensacola. She has written articles surrounding women’s health for publications like Essence magazine and enjoys all things movement and food. She is the proud owner of InHer Physique Pelvic Floor Therapy & Wellness, where her passion for women’s health truly shines.
Leslie Peck, writer/beauty expert
Leslie Peck is a local aesthetician, makeup artist, lash artist and brow specialist. She has experience in TV, film, print and celebrity makeup in Los Angeles and 11 seasons of NYC Fashion week. Leslie was featured on the front page of the Wall Street Journal in 2007 for her work at Fashion Week.
Leah Seacrest, writer/fitness expert
Leah Seacrest, a seasoned fitness industry veteran with over 30 years, experience in group fitness and personal training, co-owns REGYMEN Fitness Pensacola and is the SVP of REGYMEN Fitness overseeing operations and franchise growth. She is a mother of three and loves spending time outdoors.
Sonshine, writer
Sonshine is a Northwest Florida media personality, currenting hosting “Sonshine’s Corner” on BLAB TV. She is a business consultant, author, motivational speaker and fitness consultant. Sonshinemoorer@gmail.com.
Toni Sparks, photographer
Toni Sparks is a proud Pensacola native. As the visionary behind Short Story Studios. Toni is dedicated to creating magazine-quality images with unparalleled elegance and style. Her experiences infuse her photography with a unique perspective that celebrates and elevates every moment.
Kate Treick, photographer
Kate Treick is a professional photographer, writer, speaker and publisher who has called Pensacola home since 2012. She and her husband, Joel, have two teenaged kids and two funny little dogs. Kate loves spending time with friends, leading music at her church, reading and traveling. kate@katetreickphotography.com
Magi Thomley Williams, advertising/writer
Magi Thomley Williams, ACB, ALB is a business and nonprofit consultant, writer, trainer and speaker. Dedicated to improving her community by helping nonprofits build their boards, improve their media presence and attract donor funding,Magi enjoys writing about impactful nonprofits, thriving businesses and the women who lead them. Magi@ThomleyConsulting.com
Teresa Torres Zwierzchowski, social media
Teresa Zwierzchowski has more than 20 years’ experience in communications, including more than 15 years working for the Pensacola News Journal. She is a lover of all things communication including brand, culture and social media as well as community and public relations.
inside this issue
COVER Turn the page Page 22
PROFILE
Memoirs with Susan Lewis Page 28
10 SPEND OR SAVE
12 FASHION: Textures ring in 2025
20 LOCAL FARE: Martin Luther King Jr. parade
PRO TIPS
Let go with Sandra Gary Winborne Page 44
32 LOCAL FARE: New year plans with Bella readers
34 BODY & SOUL: Beyond the scale
38 BODY & SOUL: Freedom from alcohol
40 LOCAL FARE: Pensacola Opera’s community outreach and artistic excellence
46 WORTH THE TRIP: Australia & New Zealand
54 OUT & ABOUT: Gulf Coast Kid’s House Brunch & Bubbles
58 OUT & ABOUT: The Honor HER Foundation All Services Ball
60 OUT & ABOUT: Habitat for Humanity Gala
64 HER PERSPECTIVE: The heaviest page
66 HER PERSPECTIVE: When I write the book
On the cover: Read all about it with model Susi Robichaux in a Mine bomber jacket, Another Love ruffle trim tank and accessories from Ciao Bella Boutique. Story on Page 12.
Photo by Kate Treick Photography
BY CHELSEA OWENS / BELLAMAGAZINE.COM / PHOTOS PROVIDED
spendorsave
Loro Piana Fobello cashmere turtleneck sweater, $2,950, neimanmarcus.com
Women’s Classic Tall II boot, $200, ugg.com
Narrow check cashmere scarf, $450, burberry.com
where to shop
Oversized turtleneck sweater, $34.99, hm.com
Women’s Sarah suede shearling winter boots, $44.99, target.com
Adults’ Irish lambswool scarf, $49.95, llbean.com
H&M: Cordova Mall, 5100 N. Ninth Ave., Pensacola; 855-466-7467; hm.com
Target: multiple area locations; target.com
TEXTURES RING IN 2025
Look for faux leather, suede, corduroy, fringe fashion
By Allison McCrory / Photos by Kate Treick Photography
Mix up your winter style with clothes with character — also known as texture!
Suede is taking fashion by storm this winter and into spring. And faux leather is not far behind. With winter upon us, corduroy is thankfully now a welcome Gulf Coast option.
Animal print, now considered a neutral, is flooding runways with one cat dominating the food chain. Leopard is the king of the jungle, reported Heather Stevens, owner of Ciao Bella Boutique on Cervantes.
Over-the-knee boots and wide-leg pants are on trend, she said. And classic plaid is a 2025 favorite.
In skirts and dresses, almost anything goes, with asymmetrical hemlines in headlines.
“All lengths are trending from mini to maxi. Mid-length skirts are gaining popularity,” said Stevens.
“Oxblood, brown, stark white” are the colors of the season with all varieties and shades of white having a moment.
“Loafers, pumps, suede boots, macro necklaces, cord necklaces continue to be a trend,” said Stevens. “Also, bold statement chunky chains, oversized hoops and statement rings.”
Looking for on-point style to welcome the new year?
“Comfort is just as important as ringing in the perfect outfit,” said Stevens. “Mix fancy joggers with heels. Sequins are always a win. Shiny outfits, all white, faux fur, fringe.”
Shopping list: Suede is 2025’s favorite fabric! This fitted dress with shirred sleeves is perfect for year-round wear on the Gulf Coast and can be accessorized up or down to suit the occasion. Another Love, $64.
Susi Robichaux
Memphis native Susi Robichaux’s husband’s Air Force career brought her to the Gulf Coast. But it’s the coastal magic that keeps her here.
“There’s nothing quite like living on the water, and the fresh seafood is a constant delight. Though I have to admit, my heart is often scattered across the map these days due to our daughters living away from home.”
With daughters in Arkansas, Oklahoma and France, Robichaux knows all about turning the page.
“The empty nest has been an adjustment for both my husband and me,” said Robichaux, who is a senior project manager with Miles Partnership, a company specializing in travel and tourism marketing.
“Some days the house feels too quiet, and I miss the sounds of the girls’ laughter. But watching them soar and build their own incredible lives? That brings us both joy that’s hard to put into words. Every new accomplishment, every excited phone call about their latest adventure — it just fills my heart to the brim.”
Exploring the world through travel is a passion for Robichaux. As is making magic in the kitchen.
“When I’m not working, you’ll likely find me in my kitchen. Cooking isn’t just a hobby for me. It’s my love language.”
Shopping list: Rich oxblood is trending in 2025. This super-soft vest by Another Love, $64, stands alone beautifully — or team it with a plaid print cropped flannel button down by Hers and Mine, $34. Mid-rise flare pants by HYFVE are $39.
Shopping list: It’s a dress! And a tunic! Wear this Dress Forum dress, $58, in popular paisley with a belt — or not. Elevate with heels or wear boots to embrace the season. Or team with leggings, pants or jeans for cool winter days.
Shopping list: Faux leather, shades of white, corduroy and cropped jackets are all on trend this winter. This go-everywhere outfit meshes all four trends. Ruffle trim elevated tank by Another Love, $42; corduroy crop bomber jacket by Mine, $38; faux leather mini skirt with a split hem, $36, by Gilli.
Shopping list: Ring in the new year in this classy offshoulder ribbed midi dress with side slit by HYFVE, $49. Wear it with heels for a dressy vibe or boots and statement jewelry to go edgy!
About the Location
University of West Florida 11000 University Pkwy, Pensacola; 850-474-2000; uwf.edu
Clothes Compliments of Ciao Bella Boutique
3014 E. Cervantes St., Suite B, Pensacola; 850-777-3822; shopthebella.com
Model Compliments of Izon Models & Talent LLC
301 N. Barcelona St., Suite E, Pensacola; 850-433-2099; izonmodels.com
stylingthe shoot
Photography: Kate Treick / Fashion styling: Allison McCrory Where to shop: Ciao Bella Boutique
GS stone and disc beaded choker, $18
Farrah B When in Rome coin necklace, $40
GS earth tone leather and acrylic earrings, $16
Charlie’s Leather bracelet cuff, $18
GS off-white and gold mini hoop earrings, $14
GS gold leaf printed square acrylic earrings, $17
GS flower petal dangle earrings, $18
Jen & Co. tweed crossbody/wristlet, $48
GS rope and pearl necklace, $24
PELVIC FLOOR PHYSICAL THERAPY
Urine or fecal leakage throughout the day or during exercise
Urinary urgency or frequency
Inability to empty bladder completely
Frequent trips to the restroom at night
Pain during or after intercourse
Persistent low back or hip pain
Postpartum weakness & discomfort
Rectal pain
Abdominal separation or weakness
Recurrent abdominal pelvic symptoms after surgery
Pubic bone pain during pregnancy
GS off-white rope chain necklace with rhinestone beaded charm, $14
GS oxblood rope chain necklace with rhinestone beaded charm, $14
The Trove by Sidney Coffee Cozie, $8
WANT TO GO?
• What: The 36th annual Martin Luther King Jr. Parade
• When: 11 a.m., Jan. 20, 2025
• Where: Downtown Pensacola
• More information: mlkparadepensacola. com
Rose Patton James and Cheryl Mulrain help celebrate King’s legacy with this year’s MLK parade on Jan. 20.
local fare
“One Team, One Dream”
Martin Luther King Jr. parade inspires unity in Pensacola
By Sonshine / Photo by Kate Treick Photography
The 36th annual Martin Luther King Jr. parade will take place on Jan. 20, 2025, at 11 a.m., in downtown Pensacola, under the powerful theme “One Team, One Dream.” Rose Patton James, parade coordinator, and Cheryl Mulrain, dignitary coordinator, two passionate advocates for community unity and education, recently shared their thoughts on the event and its significance in continuing King’s enduring legacy.
James, a dedicated supporter of the parade for 16 years, emphasized its vital role in bringing the community together and serving as a living tribute to King’s vision.
“The parade inspires unity and allows us to celebrate Dr. King’s legacy while engaging younger generations in meaningful ways,” James said.
She spoke about the importance of involving young people through education and hands-on participation to ensure King’s message resonates with future leaders.
Mulrain added that the parade serves as a muchneeded opportunity for in-person connections.
“The fight for equality has evolved, but the essence of Dr. King’s teachings — unity and service — remains as important as ever,” she shared.
Mulrain highlighted how physical presence at events like the MLK parade fosters mutual understanding and builds stronger bonds across cultures.
Both James and Mulrain stressed that the parade’s inclusive nature reflects King’s dream of a society where people are judged “not by the color of their skin but by the content of their
character,” as he once said.
“Through smiles, conversations and shared experiences, we come closer to understanding one another and celebrating our diversity,” James said.
Mulrain, deeply committed to community service, elaborated on one of King’s powerful quotes, “Everybody can be great because everybody can serve,” by saying that service is a cornerstone of greatness, and the parade exemplifies this by uniting people from all walks of life to celebrate and honor King’s vision.
In addition to the parade, the festivities will include a series of enriching events leading up to January 20. These activities, such as a prayer breakfast, youth extravaganza, gospel program and other religious services, will set the tone for a day of reflection, joy and togetherness.
The MLK parade stands as a symbol of hope, unity and community strength. It is an extension of the legacy left by King — a man who dreamed of a world united by love, justice and equality. By coming together for this event, participants can demonstrate their commitment to these values.
James and Mulrain issued a heartfelt invitation to all community members, churches and organizations, urging everyone to join in the parade and its surrounding events.
“Let us walk together, hand in hand, as ‘One Team with One Dream,’” they said.
The parade serves not just as a commemoration of the past but as a living call to action for the future. It is a chance to honor King’s extraordinary contributions while inspiring others to work toward the inclusive, united world he envisioned. Make plans to attend and be part of this powerful celebration of service, equality and togetherness.
Turn the page cover story
Create a life for yourself that you’ll love
By Alice Crann Good / Photos by Getty Images & Kate Treick Photography
Stuck?
You have plenty of company if you’ve asked yourself “How did I get here?”
Many women get stuck, even frozen, in bad life situations. This is all inclusive — affecting single women, married women, single mothers, married mothers, poor women, wealthy women, women of all ages, etc., etc., etc.
It can involve innumerable life issues such as moving forward with a divorce, halting workplace sexual harassment, breaking away from a church or ending a dysfunctional friendship. Many examples exist. Whatever area of life you are stuck in, it’s challenging to make a move, to regain your sense of self and
empowerment, agree Pensacola professionals Jessica Qualls, LCSW; and Lauren Soutullo, MS/LMHC.
But it’s more than possible, they concur.
FREE THYSELF
“It’s normal for women to become disempowered, but we all have intuitive wisdom and can create a life of meaning,” said Qualls, owner of
Simply Unwind, who is a licensed therapist, social worker, meditation teacher, professor and yoga instructor.
“The journey begins with an internal shift. But before you can do this, you must say, ‘I am not doing this anymore.’ It’s not my job to see that for them. It’s my job to help them see it.”
Qualls says the self-realization is: I am not free, but I am capable of freeing myself.
“The pain of staying the same has to become greater than the change,” she stressed.
Reflecting on the therapy process, Qualls states that a common thread for all of us is that our lives are influenced by our childhoods.
“As I take extensive histories of each client and they share significant times, they have light-bulb moments,” Qualls said. “It’s about understanding and how
“What if you could trust that all will be well? Not that all things will be perfect, but that in the hard times, you have the ability to awaken to a new way of life. Wellness starts on the inside and spreads throughout our lives.”
— Jessica Qualls, LCSW, owner of Simply Unwind
they have been influenced, not about blaming parents. There is not a benefit to having a victim mindset.”
When we are children, we all experience some level of dysfunction, and as adults we recreate the dysfunction, Qualls explains.
Anticipate challenges along the way to change, Qualls says.
“Fear is the biggest barrier to change because it weaves itself through our lives and paralyzes us, but there are powers greater than fear — love, joy, connection, service, compassion and trust. These become solutions.”
To turn the page, Qualls recommends keeping a journal, connecting with your feelings, being intentional, being in the present, not projecting tomorrow, taking one step at a time until you reach your goal.
MORE TO CONSIDER
In addition to fear, hopelessness and self-doubt, another common emotion women experience that may be more
difficult to recognize is shame, says Soutullo, owner of Embodied Practice LLC, and a licensed mental health counselor.
“We often find ourselves stuck in a cycle of perfectionism driven by feelings of shame,” she said. “One striving for perfection, an impossible measure, is set up for failure. When we perpetuate the impossible societal standards upon ourselves, we inevitably fall short, leaving us navigating the painfulness of shame alone, believing we are ‘not enough.’
“It is only when we begin to share these deep, dark emotions with a safe community that shame loses its power over us, and we can begin to break free from the cycles of perfectionism. To quote Brené Brown, PhD, ‘Shame dies where stories are told.’”
Soutullo recommends one of her favorite Brown books, “The Gifts of Imperfection.” Brown is an internationally recognized author, podcaster and research professor.
Similar to shame, women also fall into the trap of people pleasing, Soutullo adds.
“This, at its core, can also be an effort to regulate the emotions of those around us,” she said. “There may be a part of us that believes, ‘If I can just make them happy enough or proud enough of me, then I can finally live my life.’ This unfortunately inaccurate belief is again an impossible standard to meet, and it takes our energy away from what we could be doing to improve our own lives.”
Don’t expect support, Soutullo forewarns.
Oftentimes, when a woman finally begins to shift her energy toward her own aspirations by setting boundaries with her physical space, time and emotions, her efforts are not readily reinforced by others — particularly “those who may have been benefiting from her overextension,” Soutullo says.
“I would love for every woman who is learning to set boundaries, perhaps for the first time in her life, to remember
Page-turning truth
Owner of Embodied Practice LLC and licensed mental health counselor
Lauren Soutullo says women of various backgrounds often hold a collective experience during their upbringing, molding them to prioritize service of others over their own wants and needs.
“How often do we hear a woman praised for all of the sacrifices she has made to the benefit of those in her life? How often is a woman praised for unapologetically pursuing a life that doesn’t directly benefit those around her?” Soutullo asked.
At some point in their lives, women often experience a loss of identity.
“Whether she’s referred to as ‘someone’s daughter,’ ‘someone’s wife’ or ‘someone’s mother,’ a woman may slowly internalize the roles placed upon her and lose touch with her truest self.”
So, get started uncovering your true self with some Soutullo advice:
• Boundaries are how you can love others and yourself at the same time.
• Build self-compassion. You can never shame yourself into a version you love.
• Enhance self-trust. Keep promises you make to yourself. Set boundaries to protect your happiness and peace.
• Do not wish your life away. Live in the present.
• Recognize your resilience. Notice what you’ve already overcome.
• Build a community of other women who support you. We aren’t meant to do this all alone.
• It is your birthright to listen to your intuition and create a life you love.
that just because someone reacts poorly to your boundary, does not mean you have done something wrong.”
After all that is said, apparently in many cases it isn’t a matter of weak willpower that keeps women from making the changes they desperately crave, Soutullo says.
Our bodies physically react, too.
“For those who have experienced childhood and adult traumas, domestically violent relationships, and even chronic stress, it is important to recognize how these experiences have impacted their nervous systems,” Soutullo elaborates.
“Although each woman’s story is unique, there are so many shared experiences that contribute to the paralyzation keeping women in situations they’ve outgrown. We cannot shame ourselves into a version we can love. We can reach our goals while meeting ourselves with gentleness and compassion.”
— Lauren Soutullo, owner of Embodied Practice LLC, and a licensed mental health counselor
“Someone with a trauma history may experience taking action to be unsafe and feel ‘frozen,’” she said. “It’s also important to recognize that for women who are currently in physically or emotionally unsafe relationships, taking action may pose an actual threat to their safety.”
Both Qualls and Soutullo agree working with mental health professionals can safely help empower women to take back control of their lives and move toward lasting and meaningful change.
Remember, said Qualls, “We are all wired to survive.”
experiences with tailor-made stays that elevate your journey beyond imagination. Offering craft and sewing retreats that transform the way you explore, relax, and create lasting memories.
Quilting • Bag-Making • Yarn Artistry
“Building an unblemished version of yourself is not how to approach (your) memoir. While showing humanness through vulnerability, your readers will see themselves in your writing. You might be sharing memories of failing, but if you failed forward and continued pushing towards success, how can that be a negative experience?”
— Susan Lewis, memoirist, writing coach, owner of Proper Publishing
profile
Susan Lewis, The Proper Publisher, takes us on a road trip down
MEMOIR LANE
By Alice Crann Good / Photo by Kate Treick Photography
Listening to published author and memoirist Susan Lewis as she unfolds her storyline, you receive an up-close view of her past and present.
The gift is a multifaceted gem that shines light on her perspectives, portions of her life — the good and the bad — and her diverse skills and talents.
She shares how she fell in love with her husband, Steve, who is now retired from the U.S. Marine Corps, when she was 15 and he was 16. He is someone she still “adores.” And Lewis expresses her feelings for their three grown children who live in the area.
“We’ve always had a very close relationship with our kids, mainly because of the constant moving during my husband’s 20 years with the Marine Corps,” Lewis said. “Our oldest, Steve Lewis III, is 33, and he’s such a kind man and absolutely the funniest person in my life.
“Our daughter, Minnie, is 28 and she’s hands down the sweetest woman in my life. She has been married to Jarrett Parker for five years. They just finished building their first house, a barndominium, in Molino, and they did it on their own with their own calloused hands.
“Our youngest, Benjamin, is 23, and like his big brother he has the kindest, most giving heart. He’s in law enforcement as a correctional officer, and we’re all so proud of him.”
Another joy for the Lewis couple: their 90-yearold farmhouse in Cantonment. The one-and-ahalf-acre property features apple, pear, lemon, kumquat and avocado trees; blueberry bushes and a seasonal vegetable garden; chickens and two boxer dogs.
It’s common to find Lewis occupied for hours canning and preserving her home-grown bounty.
“I also make butter, yogurt and bread, and almost anything you can think of — such as dog food with our sweet potatoes,” Lewis said. “It’s all wonderful and so much fun.”
So, you may wonder how writing fits into this busy bucolic picture. Well, the owner of Proper Publishing loves writing and has made time for her passion ever since she was a child.
PAIN, PENCIL, PAPER
“I remember writing a song when I was 5,” Lewis said with a laugh. “It was about my stuffed bunny that my dog tore apart. It was this kind of love song to the stuffing that was strewn all over the living room.”
As Lewis continues, the look on her face changes. The smile disappears.
“My true piece of writing was done when I was 14, the day my father was taken to jail, and eventually to prison,” said Lewis, who has four siblings. “My father was diagnosed as a violent manic depressive. But we didn’t need the diagnosis. He was a monster; he was taken to jail because he tried to kidnap a woman.”
Lewis said she wrote a free-verse poem, “Empty House,” after the police left, after walking through the house and seeing the chaos and her father’s belongings scattered everywhere.
“I wanted to pick them up, but I didn’t because I was terrified,” Lewis said. “The poem was a stream of consciousness.”
In literary criticism, stream of consciousness is an attempt to describe the multitude of thoughts and feelings passing through the mind.
“I did it because the paper and pencil would
never judge me, tell me I was wrong,” Lewis said. “I utilized that as a friend.”
From that point on, she continued writing “relentlessly.” As an adult, she started leaning into writing more poetry and short stories, memoir writing/ coaching and educational/research works.
It wasn’t always sunshine and roses.
“It’s only through failing that you learn to succeed,” she said. “I understood the concept of failing forward.”
Off the cuff, Lewis added, “I can’t even tell you how many books I have published.”
Regardless of the published author’s humility and dislike of braggadocio, literary accolades and success filled her life. Notables include serving as Escambia County Student Poetry Director for six years and being a 2014 and 2024 Poet Laureate of Northwest Florida finalist.
In addition, History Channel used her book, “Bury Your Dead: The Long, Strange History of Death and Burial,” as a resource for its series “The UnXplained” with William Shatner about three years ago (S5E2). The book also garnered the Heritage Arts Award of Literary Excellence in 2022.
HONORING MAMA
But of all of Lewis’ accomplishments, the book that still solicits profound emotions is the memoir she wrote for her late mother, who died from acute leukemia at age 51 in 1994. Lewis’ mother was Minnie Hatfield. (Yes, her lineage is bound to the famous American Hatfield-McCoy feud.)
“Goodbye, Mama” hit No. 1 on Amazon in 2015, and it is listed as a resource on the American Cancer Survivors Network.
“Writing this memoir for my mother is a very poignant memory,” Lewis said. “When my mother was dying, she said, ‘I don’t feel like I am dying. I feel like I am 16.’ It was a longing to continue, a sad thing for her.”
Lewis recalled a day she sat on the edge of her mother’s bed watching the news about Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis and her battle with cancer,
ON WRITING YOUR OWN MEMOIR
Proper Publisher owner Susan Lewis is an accomplished published author, writing coach, workshop facilitator and speaker. One of her key skills is memoir writing/coaching.
“My aim is to guide people in falling in love with words and understanding how to use words to their benefit,” she said. “Everyone can write a memoir.”
Lewis’ tips for writing your memories:
• Stop talking about it and do it.
• Don’t worry about spelling or punctuation.
• Write one complete memory, save it, and move on to the next.
• People can’t read your mind. Give them the information they need to understand you.
• What seems obvious about your life to you may not be known by anyone around you.
You can reach Lewis via email at TheProperPublisher@yahoo.com or online at properpublishing.info.
“My mother looked at me and said, ‘The whole world is watching her get sick, the whole world will know when she dies. No one is going to know when I die. I am going to die an unknown,’” Lewis said.
“My mother was so sad about that,” she continued. “A couple of days later, she said, ‘Promise me you are going to write my story after I die.’ So, the second she died, it was like this everpresent weight. I decided, ‘I have to write it and get it published.’”
Lewis said that following her mother’s death, depression walloped her so hard that she wanted to get in the grave with her mother.
“I bought all of these self-help books, but I couldn’t find the truth about grief. No one was telling the truth,” she said. “So, I started writing about my grief. I gave it to my husband, my best critic, and said, ‘OK here is the book.’
“After he finished, he said, ‘I feel like I just ate a 72-ounce steak for dinner. Honest to God, Susan, if you give this to someone to read, they are going to read it and then go jump off a bridge. You have to lighten this up.’”
Lewis thought about it and then realized that she was asking people to bury her mother and grieve with her.
“But they didn’t love her like I did,” she said.
Lewis then started rewriting the
memoir. Her goal: Get people to fall in love with her mother first so they could mourn her.
“That’s how the book came about, writing vignettes about everything that made me love her.” Lewis said. “I wrote about all of the quirky memories of her … the purple plastic sunhat that she wore … her long, red, fake nails … all of the odd things that were so strange and hilarious about her.”
Today, Lewis is committed to an ideal that she shares with others.
“In my mind, it is now my duty to be joyful, grateful and enjoy every day for my mom and myself,” she said.
This includes helping others write their memoirs.
WHY CONSIDER WRITING A MEMOIR?
“My mother could not write her memoir, but a memoir is about yourself,” explained Lewis, who worked for 26 years as a hospice volunteer for patients and families.
“There is a story inside every single person. The greatest disservice you can do to yourself is say, ‘I am not worthy. My life is unworthy of recording for publication or legacy.’
“The whole premise about a memoir is at the end of our lives we want to know that someone somewhere will remember us, someone somewhere will say our name after we are gone. We want to know that we made some sort of impact.”
A memoir gives you a chance at immortality, Lewis says.
Today, Lewis teaches memoir writing one-on-one or via the University of West Florida’s Leisure Learning program when she has time. And, no, you don’t have to excel at writing.
“Over half of the people who come to my class say, ‘I am a terrible writer, but I want to get my story down.’ At the end of the class, they are so confident because everyone can write. They just have to believe in themselves. The one thing that differentiates us is how much belief, love and encouragement we get in life,” Lewis said.
“Giving this is what I do best.”
STRENGTHEN YOUR COMMUNITY. CHANGE A LIFE.
This month we asked Bella readers to share their plans and expectations for the new year. Read their responses here and join the conversation on our social media platforms. Tell us about your goals, resolutions or hopes for 2025 at facebook.com/pensacolabella or instagram.com/pensacolabella.
—CompiledbyMagiThomleyWilliams
I am looking forward most to growing in my career, both in knowledge and area-wide connections, as it’s been the best decision I’ve made to date to step into the non-profit sector full-time!”
— Kathy Andrade, center operations specialist, Programs for USO Florida NW
I have always been passionate about helping women, so in 2025 I am most looking forward to using my gifts and talents to help even more women find and pursue their purpose. Right now, I do that through hosting the Women’s Empowerment Brunch, coaching and mentoring, but next year, I plan to expand with more services and programs in an effort to help even more women. Coming together to heal, grow and make our community a better place is what it’s all about.
— Kay Mitchell, Medicare advisor, WellCare
I am looking forward to clarity of purpose by being more useful in my community. Volunteering for nonprofits close to my heart will help fulfill me in 2025!
— Lizz Acosta-Pearson, Coastal Pix Photo Booth
I am looking forward to helping the homeless and the poor in our community through the outreach ministries at the Society of St. Vincent de Paul. We are a society of listening to people’s struggles and hardships and trying to help them the best way we can. We hope to be a light at the end of the tunnel for them.
— Danette Krumel, president/interim executive director, Society of St. Vincent de Paul, Tallahassee/Pensacola District
In 2024, I embraced a year of change, and in 2025, I’m looking forward to finding a better balance between family, work and philanthropy.
— Jessie McCarthy, training delivery manager, CrowdStrike
Beyond the scale body & soul
Embracing the full fitness picture
By Leah Seacrest /
Illustration by Getty Images
When it comes to health and fitness, the scale often takes center stage as the ultimate measure of success. However, focusing solely on that single number can overshadow the true markers of progress and derail your motivation. Health is about so much more than weight, and embracing a broader perspective can transform your journey into one of empowerment and sustainability.
WHAT THE SCALE DOESN’T TELL YOU
The scale only tells you one part of the whole story. The number it gives you is a small snapshot of your overall health. It doesn’t account for essential factors like lean muscle mass, hydration levels or other non-scale victories. For example, as you build muscle through strength training, your weight might stay the same — or even increase — while your body composition improves dramatically. Muscle takes up less space than fat and burns more calories at rest, meaning you’re stronger, more efficient and leaner — even if the scale doesn’t reflect it.
“Tracking lean muscle mass has been a game-changer for me,” said Jen Bradshaw, a fitness enthusiast who now measures her progress using tools like body composition analysis. “It’s empowering to see my strength grow even when the scale doesn’t move.”
Hydration also plays a critical role in overall health. Staying properly hydrated supports digestion, energy levels and even mental clarity. Yet, the scale won’t tell you if you’re meeting your hydration goals or if your body is responding positively to better water intake.
THE SMALL WINS ARE BIG!
True progress is about the habits you cultivate, not just the end result. It’s easy to fall into the trap of expecting dramatic changes overnight — especially in today’s fast-paced world and with the influence of social media — but lasting health comes from small, consistent steps over time.
Instead of focusing on rapid weight loss, shift your attention to the incremental improvements that lead to lifelong habits. Did you add more vegetables to your plate today? Did you swap a sugary drink for water?
Did you find time to move your body, even if it was just a short walk? Did you get a good night’s sleep? Each small win is BIG and serves as a building block toward a healthier lifestyle.
“Patience is key,” said Bradshaw. “I used to get discouraged when I didn’t see fast results, but now I focus on how I feel, how my clothes fit, and how much stronger I’ve become. That’s what keeps me going.”
SETTING REALISTIC EXPECTATIONS
Health isn’t a sprint; it’s a marathon. Dramatic shortterm results often come with sacrifices that aren’t sustainable — crash diets, overtraining or unhealthy calorie restrictions. Instead, prioritize goals that you can maintain for life. Think about adding rather than subtracting: more nutrient-rich foods, more water, more movement, more sleep. These small, manageable shifts create a foundation for success.
REDEFINING SUCCESS — NON-SCALE VICTORIES
Progress can be measured in countless ways, from improved energy levels and reduced stress to better sleep quality and increased strength. The key is to find metrics that align with your goals and reflect the full picture of your health.
Tools like body composition scans or even keeping a journal of how you feel each day can help you assess progress holistically. Remember, it’s not about perfection; it’s about consistency and growth.
YOURS ALONE
Ultimately, your health journey is uniquely yours. It’s about feeling good in your own skin, finding joy in movement and nourishing your body in ways that make you feel strong and alive. The scale is just one small piece of the puzzle. By looking beyond it, you’ll uncover a more meaningful and rewarding path to wellness — one built on habits that last a lifetime.
Take a deep breath, step off the scale and celebrate the progress you’re making in all the ways that truly matter. Because when you focus on building a healthier, stronger you, the results will speak for themselves.
body & soul
Freedom from alcohol
Evaluating your relationship with alcohol in the new year
By Cynthia Reeves / Photo by Kate Treick Photography
She calls it her superpower. About thirty-five months ago, 54-year-old Jackie Hayes had her last drink.
“My initial thought was, ‘I’m free,’” she said.
In a culture obsessed with alcohol, Hayes feels empowered. The nightly question, “Should I drink tonight?” is now answered with a firm “No.”
“It is my superpower because I can achieve all my goals and live my best life without the anguish of being a prisoner in my own body.”
January and the new year mark a time when many women examine their relationship with alcohol. Dry January has become a popular challenge. According to “The Dry Challenge” by Hilary Sheinbaum, the term was coined in the UK in 1984 by a nonprofit’s campaign to reduce “the harm that can be caused by alcohol.” Now it is so popular that other months compete, such as Mocktail May or Sober September.
FOR GOOD HEALTH
Renea Clowdsley, a nurse practitioner in Gulf Breeze, calls Dry January “a great idea.” She has done it and spent extended periods of time being alcohol-free. As a healthcare provider and a part of the Pensacola Beach community, she sees the paradox women face.
“They are either imbibing to be a part of the group or abstaining for better health outcomes,” she said. “It is a huge issue in our society.”
Clowdsley believes most women do not fully understand the health impacts.
“Even moderate intake increases the risk of breast cancer,” she said. “Greater than seven drinks a week increases stroke, ischemic heart disease and hypertension.”
Clowdsley says women who abstain from alcohol have fewer menopause symptoms including hot flashes. Her statistics come from the North American Menopause Society. NAMS recommends that healthy women consume no more than one drink per day or seven drinks per week during menopause. Clowdsley adds that drinking also increases osteoporosis and the likelihood of hip fractures.
FOR A BETTER LIFE
Hayes, a hospice nurse with Emerald Coast Hospice, has many “whys” for quitting.
“Honestly, I just had a mind shift. I didn’t pick up any new habits. I just decided I didn’t want to poison myself anymore.”
Hayes deals with crises every day as a nurse and wants to “be there fully for my patients and family.”
In April, she lost her husband of thirty years, Tom Hayes, after his battle with lung cancer. She no longer felt drinking was
reducing stress. Her drinking had gotten to be a vicious habit.
“I was stuck in this cycle. I got home from work and one drink turned to two, or three, or four,” she said.
READING ABOUT IT
Two best-selling books on women and alcohol inspired Hayes to quit. Both “Quit Like a Woman” by Holly Whitaker and “This Naked Mind” by Annie Grace focus on the idea that we live in a world obsessed with drinking. Both authors believe that the alcohol industry is targeting women more now than ever.
Whitaker writes alcohol has suddenly become “an accessory to every product, service, or event everywhere: wineglass holders for the bathtub, wine yoga for my nerves, pro-wine onesies for my baby, wine wipes for my wine-stained teeth, wine glass holder necklaces for my aching arms, wine sports bras for my runs.”
She adds, “There is a lot of effort going into promoting alcohol consumption and even more an effort to normalize it. And it’s only getting worse.”
Grace has a similar take.
“You assume our culture is so intertwined with alcohol that living life without it will be impossible,” she writes.
Grace encourages a 30-day experiment similar to Dry January to “test something about yourself.” Women may join her challenge online or listen to “The Naked Mind Podcast” to hear counseling sessions with women examining their drinking habits.
Hayes encourages women to start the new year by listening to the podcast or reading one of the books even if just to be better educated.
“I think we are dumbing down our women and making our lives smaller,” she said.
She realizes it is a personal choice and a commitment that is difficult in our culture.
“I want to stress people who don’t drink absolutely don’t judge people who do, but I want women to know how much better life can be.”
A DRY JANUARY READING LIST:
• “Dry January Workbook: Celebrating the Challenge” with Amy Page
• “Quit Like a Woman” by Holly Whitaker
• “The Dry Challenge” by Hilary Sheinbaum
• “This Naked Mind: Control Alcohol” by Annie Grace
• “The Alcohol Experiment” by Annie Grace
local fare
Pensacola Opera Dazzling Gulf Coast young and old
Community outreach and artistic excellence mark 42nd
By Allison McCrory / Photo by Kate Treick Photography
It started 41 years ago when a group of Pensacola singers, parents, music teachers and businesspeople yearned to express their talents in the centuries-old vocal-theater fusion called opera.
“Sets were created in the founders’ workshops, sewing machines buzzed in homes to create the costumes, the orchestra and singers were hired and rehearsals staged,” explained Alex Hilkey, director of marketing and communications for the Pensacola Opera.
The volunteers created a grassroots opera company called Pensacola Chamber Opera. The fledgling group successfully produced Mozart’s “Così fan tutte,” in English.
Seven hundred people flocked to three shows and a new Pensacola art movement was born.
Fast forward to 2025. The opera works out of a downtown building and presents two elaborate mainstage productions each year at the historic Saenger Theatre. Professional principal artists bring their operatic talents to Pensacola from around the country. The Pensacola Symphony Orchestra brings the instrumental music to life. Costumes and makeup are professionally created.
TAKING IT TO THE STREETS
In addition to traditional mainstage
year
productions, the opera is on a mission to introduce opera to the masses.
“Each season our Jan Miller Studio Artists perform at various outreach and education events to bring opera down off the stage and into the community. Part of our mission is to provide educational programs and other opera-related community events for people of all ages, interests and backgrounds,” Hilkey said.
Children’s operas wow more than 8,000 area school children and their families from September through March when the productions perform in Escambia and Santa Rosa schools.
“In addition to being in the schools, we also partner with Northwest Florida public libraries to bring this production to various branches throughout the year. These performances are free and open to the public,” Hilkey said.
Brown bag operas offer downtown Pensacola employees a free lunch break cultural treat at the opera center. Opera Al Fresco is a pop-up outdoor concert series that brings free live music to area parks and green spaces around Pensacola.
“The vision with Opera Al Fresco is to try to meet people where they are and bring amazing music to them. Our latest concert at the Big Lagoon State Park amphitheater this past summer was met with 120 in the audience,” Hilkey said.
And the list goes on with Pours
TOP: Tenor Micah Perry performs during one of the Opera’s brown bag lunch breaks. ABOVE LEFT: Micah Perry, tenor; Rachel Fitzgerald, soprano; Camille Robles, mezzo-soprano; Meredith Stemen, pianist; Joseph O’Shea, baritone. ABOVE RIGHT: Camille Robles, mezzo-soprano.
MAINSTAGE MAGIC
It’s that season of the year when an art form tracing its roots to 1597 graces the stage of Pensacola’s jewel, the Saenger Theatre. Instrumental music, elaborate sets, exquisite costumes, a local opera ensemble and of course drama, comedy and soul-stirring vocals will fill the theater for two productions. Pensacola Opera searched far and wide for the best principal artists to wow patrons and is ready to present the fruit of its labor in upcoming months in two mainstage shows.
“The Marriage of Figaro” by Mozart | Jan. 24 and 26
It’s a comedy with some of opera’s favorite themes: philandering, cunning and hilarious twists of fate.
Figaro’s womanizing boss, Count Almaviva, attempts to throw a wrench in his employee’s upcoming wedding to Susanna, whom he hopes to seduce.
Yet Figaro has other ideas, enlisting the help of Susanna and the Countess to unravel Almaviva’s divisive plot.
Brilliant music and belly laughs ensue in this timeless comedy inspired by the sequel to “The Barber of Seville.”
“Pagliacci” by Leoncavallo | March 14 and 16
What’s more dramatic than a love triangle?
Featuring one of the most well-known arias of all time, “Vesti La Giubba,” this opera tells the story of young thespians Canio and wife Nedda.
Canio becomes enraged when he discovers his wife’s affair. Preparing to go on stage, he pleads for her to disclose her lover’s name; she refuses, and their fellow comedy troupe member urges them to get into costume.
A very real tragedy ensues on stage.
Where Inspired Days Begin
Magic is in the air whenever the Pensacola Opera performs. Their two mainstage productions will be at the historic Pensacola Saenger Theatre.
& Encores, where opera artists combine happy hour at local bars and breweries with opera performance and the annual Opera After Dark. Singers perform at The Garden Club, Bayview Senior Center and Jackson’s Steakhouse. National anthems at an Ice Flyers game, Memorial Day celebrations and Visit Pensacola’s annual meeting just might be performed by an opera singer. The Opera donates tickets for charitable auctions and sets up booths at children’s events.
“You just never know when an opera singer might pop up,” Hilkey said.
WHAT’S OLD IS NEW
In bygone days, opera was considered entertainment for the silverhaired set. No more!
“Over the past two seasons, we’ve seen over 300 new subscriptions to the Opera and a renewed energy and interest in younger volunteers, ticket buyers and even donors,” Hilkey said.
The fresh, vibrant passion comes at the perfect time. The Pensacola Opera lost $70,000 in annual funding due to sweeping state cultural arts cuts. And while ticket sales cover about 40 percent of operational costs, an artsloving community covers the majority.
While the trend is new, it’s not surprising. Opera is timeless, Hilkey said, tapping into universal emotions.
“Many people may not realize the similarities between opera, musical theater and other types of performance and pop culture. While ‘Rent,’ for example, is a familiar show that we would all enjoy to see on Broadway, many have never heard of ‘La Bohème.’ I use this as an example because ‘Rent’ is a rock opera based on the opera ‘La Bohème’ that premiered back in 1896,” she said.
“Whether you’re seeing a contemporary English-language piece or one of Mozart’s operas from the 18th century, you’ll be able to see at least parts of yourself in the story!”
windows again
“Each season our Jan Miller Studio Artists perform at various outreach and education events to bring opera down off the stage and into the community. Part of our mission is to provide educational programs and other operarelated community events for people of all ages, interests and backgrounds.”
— Alex Hilkey, director of marketing and communications for the Pensacola Opera
CUSTOM ROLLER SHADES, BLINDS, PLANTATION SHUTTERS, WOVEN GRASS, AND DRAPERY
pro tips
LETTING GO The power of
By Magi Thomley Williams / Photo by Kate Treick Photography
“Desuetude,” Sandra Gary Winborne, Ph.D., explained in her “Are You Stuck?” vlog, is about things we no longer use, no longer need, yet find so hard to part with.
“It’s an interesting word,” she said. “Many of us have a lot of stuff around that we no longer need, but at the time, when they were invented, everybody needed them.”
From microwaves to DVDs, from typewriters to 8-track tapes, many of us cling to items that
are simply outdated. Yet, emotionally, we’re still holding on.
Winborne, affectionately known as Dr. Winnie, holds a doctor of philosophy in adult education and is a prominent speaker, an advisor on emotional well-being and an educational consultant at Winnie & Associates, LLC. Her “Are You Stuck?” vlog, produced three-times weekly, is a platform to empower participants to learn to converse with anyone; child, king or queen. She has approximately 4.3 thousand followers who join at facebook.com/sandragary.winbornephd.
Winborne recently examined how “desuetude” brings clutter into our lives and how to clear the clutter. She shared a poignant story about her own experience of holding onto her late mother’s belongings.
“When my mother passed,” she recalled, “I kept a lot of stuff. And one day I woke up and it was nine and a half years that the stuff was still in storage. That’s when I said, that’s ridiculous.”
She realized that despite paying nearly $10,000 over the years to store these items, they had no real purpose in her life.
Sandra Gary Winborne, speaker, advisor and educational consultant, says that we should recognize that it’s normal for things to become “desuetude” in our lives, to let them go, and to move forward.
Many of us have homes and hearts filled with keepsakes that we’re emotionally tied to, but which serve no purpose in our current lives. Often, these objects become dormant — a physical and emotional weight we drag from year to year.
Winborne pointed out that our attachment to material items also represents the constant evolution of technology and lifestyle. In a world where even CDs are considered vintage, it’s clear that technology is evolving at a pace that makes many possessions short-lived.
“Eventually, we have a house full of unused stuff, she said.
The solution? Recognize that it’s normal for things to become “desuetude” in our lives, to let them go, and to move forward.
Letting go isn’t just about making space; it’s about creating a life where your value is based on experiences, not things. And while it’s tempting to hold onto every memento, freeing yourself from the weight of unused items can lead to a lighter, more fulfilling life.
Winborne shared how she now sends boxes of her mother’s cherished items to family members who would appreciate them, saying, “It makes me happy knowing they’re being enjoyed, rather than gathering dust.”
If you’re struggling to part with things, start small. Take stock of what you have and be honest about what truly adds value to your life. Consider donating items to someone who would enjoy them now or re-gifting heirlooms to family members. And remember, you’re allowed to let go of the past to make room for a present you love.
As Winborne wisely observed, “Everything we have and hold on to will become obsolete, just like we will.”
But rather than clinging to objects that have outlived their purpose, we can choose to live more intentionally and in tune with the world as it is now.
After all, “Stuff is just stuff, but the essence of who we are is who we are,” Winborne reminds us.
So, take a deep breath, let go of what’s holding you back, and embrace the life you want to create.
Australia & New Zealand
Just do it! The beauty is astounding — and worth the long trip
Story & photos by Liz Biggs
The iconic Sydney Opera House has a spectacular light show/projection nightly on the Opera House’s eastern Bennelong sails.
CLOCKWISE FROM TOP: The Bondi Icebergs — Sydney’s famous ocean pool; the Sculpture by the Sea exhibition along the beautiful Bondi to Coogee Coastal Walk.
When we arrived at the airport to check in for our flight to Sydney, we were turned away due to the fact that we didn’t have an Australian travel visa. We had to apply and wait five hours for our visa to be granted, cancel and rebook our flights, and stress out for hours not knowing when exactly it would be granted. (It was 2 am in Australia; do visa granters work all night?)
I packed my European travel converter only to realize upon arrival, with a dead phone, that Australian power outlets are not like anything I’d ever seen before. Lucky for us, our boys had the correct converter and we all took turns charging our phones for two weeks. I wore a hat every day so never needed to plug in any hair appliances. Springtime is usually reasonably warm, so I packed cute things to wear. Turns out it’s pretty close to the South Pole down there, so all I wore was a brown down jacket all day every day — sad I lugged those cute clothes halfway around the world for nothing; all they got was wrinkled.
I forgot to pack skin care products, so I just used hotel shampoo and lotion for my face. Who knew your face could break out at my age? I felt like a teenager with all those pimples. So, maybe you shouldn’t take travel advice from me. Or maybe you should? Here’s my advice — just do it … just go. What’s the worst that can happen? In countries like Australia and New Zealand, there is so much astounding beauty and fascinating nature, what does it matter if there are a few setbacks? The good outweighs the bad by at least 1000%. (Don’t trust me with math either. And maybe hire a travel agent for your trip down under.)
SYDNEY
We spent a week in Sydney — four nights in The Rocks neighborhood, located on the southern shore of Sydney Harbour in the historic city centre, and three nights in Bondi Beach. The Rocks is near the Circular Quay (grand central station for the ferries), so we were able to ferry to Double Bay to meet friends,
the Toronga Zoo (highly recommend), Manly Beach (we liked Bondi better, but worth the trip), as well as walk to all the main attractions. The Opera House is amazing; the walk along the water to Darling Harbour was lovely; and we walked across the magnificent Harbour Bridge (well, halfway and then walked up the steps to the Pylon Lookout). We did not sign up for the bridge climb — it was too expensive and time-consuming for us. But it was fun to see the crazy people climbing it in the extreme wind! One afternoon we walked to the Royal Botanic Gardens, and happened upon a concert — Rufus Du Sol. We sat in the park watching the sun set behind the Opera House with hundreds of locals, acting like we knew what we were doing, loving every minute of it.
Being from a beach town, I didn’t think I’d be that impressed with Bondi Beach, so we didn’t even book a hotel there until we took a bus from downtown and experienced it. The beauty is hard to put into words, but I’d say it’s kind of a combination of Big Sur and Waikiki. The waves are huge, and they crash violently into the cliffs. And there are no guard rails — you can walk down on the rocks into the crashing waves along the miles of coastline if you are brave enough. We watched the surfers and swimmers from the Bondi Icebergs, Sydney’s most famous ocean pool. I could have stayed there for hours watching the surfers, especially when the kite surfers jumped 20 feet up into the air and did eight flips. We even saw whales out in the distance.
The day we planned to do the Bondi to Coogee Coastal Walk (allow an entire day for this, folks) just happened to be the annual Sculpture by the Sea exhibition. There were over 100 sculptures installed along the Coastal Walk, each more fantastic than the other. It is only in late October, so plan your trip to Bondi then — so worth it!
NEW ZEALAND
People ask me which I liked better, Australia or New Zealand. That’s like choosing a favorite child; I can’t answer that question. But I can provide some tips.
FRIDAY
EVERY FRIDAY FROM 11:00 AM
CLOCKWISE FROM TOP LEFT: Bluff, NZ — the southernmost town in the South Island; the shore of Lake Wakatipu in Queenstown, NZ; the Southern Alps of NZ; waterfalls along the Southern Scenic Route of NZ.
One week is not enough to see New Zealand. It looks tiny on the map compared to Australia. But Australia is about the size of the United States and the South Island of New Zealand is about the size of Florida. Silly me for thinking we could see the entire island in a week. Well, we could have if it were flat. If only I would have used a relief map, I would have planned more time to drive up, down and around the Southern Alps and Fiordland National Park. If you try to see all the mind-blowing beauty New Zealand has to offer in one week, take some advice from the Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young song, “Love the One You’re With,” because you will do a lot of driving. Don’t get me wrong; the scenery is otherworldly, more beautiful and fascinating than anywhere I’ve been. But we had to cover a lot of ground to fill our bucket list. Bring your adult children with you! They will drive on the left side of the road way better than you, navigate all
the unmarked landmarks and trails when there is no cell service, have plenty of downloaded music on their phones, and their hilarious banter will keep you entertained (Lord of the Rings debates, speaking in thick Aussie accents, facts about fern trees and wonderful stories about their five weeks camper-vanning down the East Coast of Australia — the people they met, the sharks they swam with on the Great Barrier Reef, and their encounter with a wild cassowary). But mostly, seeing their excitement and the world through their curious eyes made an eight-hour commute to the magical Milford Sound worth the trip. Majestic waterfalls, seals, penguins (one cute little penguin swam from shore to our boat) — booking a boat tour of the Milford Sound is a must-do. According to Wikipedia, Rudyard Kipling called it the eighth Wonder of the World. We stayed in Queenstown, located in the Southern Alps, for the first four nights, and it was picturesque. (Fun
fact: The NZ Alps get more snow than the Swiss Alps.) Ski season had just ended, so we got a great deal on panoramic-view lodging and had pot roast in the crock pot waiting for us after our 12-hour Milford Sound day. Hiking to the top of Queenstown Hill (more a mountain than a hill!), up past the ski lift, provided the best view. We brought plenty of snacks and sandwiches on the 14-hour day we drove the entire Southern Scenic Route to Dunedin through the Catlins — such a diverse range of scenery from interesting rock formations, small rain forests, waterfalls, seals asleep on long sandy beaches, rugged coastlines, very few people and lots of sheep.
Our stay in Dunedin was less picturesque; it has more of a big city/ goth vibe. But the short drive to the beautiful Otago Peninsula to see penguins clumsily walking on the beach and the giant wingspan of the albatross flying in the sky above us made it well worth it. Our boys continued on to
Residents of Sydney’s fantastic Toronga Zoo.
Christchurch, Mount Cook and Abel Tasman National Park and were filled with even more awe and wonder.
Several times during our week in New Zealand, locals seemed perplexed that we came all the way from America to their little island. Even the garbage man at our Airbnb in Queenstown asked why we were there; ski season was over. Our waitress in Dunedin said, “We don’t get many Americans here. Why’d you come all this way?” They seemed astounded when we answered, “Nature.” They see it every day and take it for granted. I suppose it’s like Pensacola Beach – one of the most beautiful beaches in the world -and sometimes we locals get busy and hardly notice it’s there.
So, trust me. Or don’t, and hire a travel agent. But put Australia and New Zealand on your bucket list. The beauty is astounding — worth the long, long, long trip.
out&about
Gulf Coast Kid’s House Brunch & Bubbles
Photos by Toni Sparks / Short Story Studios
Jessie Goff, Sarah Villaverde, Nicole Partridge, Christina Miller, Robin Arnold, Megan Manning, Latia Bryant
Gulf Coast Kid’s House Brunch and Bubbles was on Oct. 27 at Portofino. It was an afternoon of food, cocktails and fundraising in a sold-out Havana-themed event. All proceeds went to Gulf Coast Kid’s House child advocacy programs.
Carl Lee, Kim Chope, Laura Haferkamp
Magi Thomley Williams, Delayna Blankenship, Jeff Ottley, Anissa Ottley, Jennifer Wells
Mackenzie Kagarise, Liz Gomez, Jennifer Zam, Kellie Gomez, Ellen Mila, Kathy Basham, Nancy Bissinger, Sally Smith
Renea Clowdsley, Casey Kuktelionis
Carla Jones, Kerry Hanley
Kaitlyn Davis, Stacey Kostevicki
Mary Lee, Cheryl Loper
Amy Brown, Delayna Blankenship, Jennifer Belcher, Jennifer Wells, Heather Barnes Lassiter
Kelly MacLeod & Magi Thomley Williams
Julie Franklin, Julie Duvall
Gwen Vigon, MariCarmen Josephs
Florentina Litra, Lindsay Bassett, Amanda Solbani
Alejandro Reyes, Kimberly Reyes
out&about
The Honor HER Foundation All Services Ball
The Honor HER Foundation, Inc. is an organization dedicated to bringing together military personnel, law enforcement officers and first responders for a public celebration. This year’s event was on Nov. 8 at Culinary Productions in Pensacola.
Photos by Toni Sparks / Short Story Studios
Alexa Anderson, Nicole Ellis, Tarlanda Dempsey, Octavia Gooden, Lisa McAllister
Carlotta McDaniel, Felita Gray, Vanessa Hawkins, Tarlanda Dempsey, Latandra Loyd, Takia Berry
Lynn Waters, Kim Ray Edens, Barbara Francis, Sandra Winborne
Justina Hunter, Carlotta Andrews, Carol Ann Rundberg, Gwen Holmes
Sally Rivera, Bob Rivera
Lisa Edwards, Deborah Edwards
Monica Silver Sanford
out&about
Habitat for Humanity Gala
Photos by Toni Sparks / Short Story Studios
Barbi Stahl, Elizabeth Denton, Ginger Underwood, Ellen Dixon, Debbie Del Vecchio
The annual Pensacola Habitat for Humanity Gala on Nov. 14 at The Sanctuary was an evening of celebration and shared philanthropic excitement for an organization that helps so many in our community.
Tammy Diehl, Michael Hobbs, Madrina Ciano
Craig Hindsman, Amanda Hindsman, Barbara Little
Angie Sanchez, Veronica Dias
Sydney Davis, Deedee Jones
Robert & Tammy Lynn Barr
Ashley Saba, Nicole Murphy Hobbs, Sarah Windham, Tyler Windham
Hannah Waldschmidt, Kaily Ladnier, Donald Ward
Missy King, Angie King
The Marriage of Figaro
Mozart’s
TheMarriageof Figaro
Composer: Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart Librettist: Lorenzo Da Ponte Conductor: Cody Martin Director: Corey McKern
January 24 + 26, 2025
Susanna and Figaro are getting married! There’s just one problem— Figaro’s boss, the overbearing and womanizing Count Almaviva, is trying to delay their marriage in order to seduce Susanna himself. Luckily, Figaro has a few tricks up his sleeve...Mozart and Da Ponte’s timeless comedy—based on Beaumarchais’s sequel to The Barber of Seville—contains some of opera’s most brilliant music…and plenty of laughs!
Susanna and Figaro are getting married! There’s just one problem—Figaro’s boss, the overbearing and womanizing Count Almaviva, is trying to delay their marriage in order to seduce Susanna himself. Luckily, Figaro has a few tricks up his sleeve! This timeless comedy— based on Beaumarchais’s sequel to The Barber of Seville—contains some of opera’s most brilliant music…and plenty of laughs!
Leoncavallo’s Pagliacci
March 14 + 16, 2025
While preparing for a performance with their commedia dell’arte troupe, Canio becomes enraged when he discovers that his wife, Nedda, has been having an affair. During the performance, Canio returns to his jealous rage, and Nedda’s young lover, Silvio, rushes the stage to save her—culminating in a very real tragedy. Featuring one of the most well known arias of all time, “Vesti la giubba,” is a verismo masterpiece of dra matic proportions.
Composer Conductor: Director:
While dell’arte that his refuses urges Canio lover, a very arias masterpiece
Lee Hansen, Mitzi Shanholtzer
Reverend Anthony Scott, Lashay Scott
By Sharla Gorder
The heaviest page her perspective
And we turn the page on another year — and though we actually just went from a Tuesday to a Wednesday, there is always much ado about January first. There are the fireworks, the champagne, the kiss at midnight. And then there are resolutions to make, vision boards to create, closets to purge. And for many, challenges to undertake.
A few weeks ago, I responded to a Facebook invitation to join in a “Dry January” challenge. I smiled as I typed my response — “I’m on my 122nd month. Feeling great. I’ll be happily joining you.”
I paused as I hit reply. It is so easy to be happy about that decision I made all those years ago. But to be cavalier about it, even now, is to be less than genuine. Yes, I turned that page and never looked back (my husband and I gave up alcohol on the same day in 2012) but it was by far the heaviest page I have ever lifted. In fact, I had to have help. Lots of it.
group, stunned.
How could this have happened?
In my intense grief, I was reminded of the “descending elevator analogy” I had read about. There are so many floors between our first drink and our last — and if alcohol (or any substance really) begins to feel even a little bit problematic, that elevator only goes down.
Many friends were surprised. It seemed to them that I drank like everyone else — and everyone else was fine. No one had ever had to scrape me up off a barroom floor. I never missed a minute of work. I was rarely the “most buzzed” at any gathering.
That dubious distinction went to my best friend. And she too was not totally convinced that her drinking was a serious problem. She had tried to moderate before and could go for a week or two, even a whole “Sober October” or “Dry January” — ostensibly proving to herself, “I can quit any time.”
At one point, she even attended some Alcoholics Anonymous meetings, but after a couple of weeks reported to me, “Sharla, I’m just not like those people. Their stories are so extreme.”
Six months later she died drunk in the back of a taxi. She was 47.
I was shattered. Her girls were devastated. Our friend
But the doors do open on every floor on that descent. We just have to walk through them before we bottom out in that dark dank basement, inhabited only by a hooded ghoul brandishing a scythe.
My elevator doors opened to many, many floors between the time I first found myself as a young mom thinking, “It’s been a rough day, I deserve a glass of wine,” to the desperate morning decades later when I woke up and wished I hadn’t.
Shame had pinned me to my bed.
Author/researcher Brené Brown talks about this.
“Shame needs three things to grow out of control in our lives: secrecy, silence and judgment.”
So I spoke up. I told one person. Just one, to start. My “secret” was out. My silence was broken. My harsh judgment of myself suspended. The heaviest page had been turned.
It was hard that first year. I solicited help from every source available to me: family, friends, a therapist, my doctor, AA, God …
It is not hard now. In fact, as I write this column, I’ve had to read back over my writings from that time to help me to stay humble and real about it.
At first when people would ask me why I had given up alcohol completely, I would tell them honestly: “I lost the privilege. I was drinking irresponsibly and had to stop.”
Today, when asked why I don’t drink, I smile and tell them an oh-so-miraculous truth.
I’m not thirsty anymore.
GREATER PENSACOLA CHAMBER’S
AlltogetHer
The 3rd AlltogetHer event is for women attendees to connect directly with other influential women in all sectors of the Greater Pensacola community. This hosted gathering will allow open, productive conversation in an intimate group format, led by influenceHERS. These influenceHERS are local, established professional women who have vast experience in a variety of fields. Light breakfast and lunch provided. Reserve your seat for this all day event!
ANNUAL WOMEN’S CONFERENCE
Thursday, January 30, 2025
Echo Life Church,: 3850 N. Davis Hwy., Pensacola
Scan the QR code for tickets (bit.ly/AlltogetHer2025)
Presenting Sponsor & Host
Carol Carlan
Keynote Speaker
Polly Payne
Jennifer Grove
Jennifer McFarren
Robin Reshard
Suzannah Driver
Angela Lane
Hailey Lotz
Hong Potomski
By Liz Biggs
When I write the book her perspective
At our monthly Bella staff meeting, our amazing editor handed us a list of all the 2025 issue themes. I’ve been known to veer off-topic a few times, so, it being a new year and all, I decided to behave and stick to the theme. When I saw “Unwritten Stories” listed as an idea, I thought oh, I’ve got a few of those, can I take that one?
Sometimes people ask me if I’m going to write a book. It sounds like a great idea, but life keeps getting in the way. Life is really fun right now; why would I want to sit still long enough to write a book? But I truly do love to write, so I sit still long enough to write something random every day. Maybe someday I’ll find a way to string those pages together and call it a book. For now, they are just scenes. Or are they scenarios?
crossed, lightning struck.
After a while, I was pretty sure I was in love with him. But I wasn’t sure he felt the same about me. I wanted to say “I love you,” but I was afraid. What if it was too much, too soon? What if those three simple words scared him away? (What if he replied, “It’ll pass,” like the hot priest in “Fleabag”? Did you know that humans are the only animals that fear rejection more than death?)
Although almost all my book club books have been about murder lately, my unwritten book would be about love. (Mostly because I don’t know much about murder.) I’d write about young, innocent, awkward, star-crossed lovers who keep being foolish and mess up everything between them. They choose different paths. They think love grows on trees. Do they end up together? Do they end up happy or miserable? Heck, I don’t know — I’d have to write the book to find out.
Maybe it could be a young adult novel called “Three Simple Words,” but of course it would be very complicated and way more than three words. Maybe this could be a flashback scene:
I’m old, but once upon a time I was young — a teenager with no confidence, always second-guessing myself. And I fell for a boy. I didn’t know much about love. I read about it in books and saw it in movies, but I didn’t know how it felt. My feelings were strong for this boy, so I knew it was more than just a crush. When we’d say goodbye, I’d ache until I saw him again. I wasn’t sure if he was the right boy for me; our lives seemed to be going down different paths. But when our paths
So I didn’t say it. For a very long time. I psyched myself up to say it a few times, but then talked myself out of it. Why is it so hard to look someone in the eye and say three simple words?
One day, he was leaving, and we were saying goodbye. We hugged, said goodbye, turned to go … but kept repeating that sequence. (It was always so hard to say goodbye to him. I never knew when I’d see him again.) After a few times, he impatiently said he really had to go, or he’d be late. I looked down and stammered slowly, “Well … I’ll … let … you …” and before I could say go, he quickly responded, “I love you too, but I have to go.” I was in shock, but I faked normalcy like it was no big deal. The ice was broken!
I walked away feeling like I was walking on clouds. Like I was ten feet tall. Like I had mountains in the palm of my hand. The sun was brighter, the sky was bluer, my heart swelled so much I think it doubled in size. How lucky we are as humans to feel that teenage feeling!
Now that I’m old, I’m not as stingy with those three words. I say them to my kids every time we talk. I say them to my cats, my siblings, my friends. Heck, sometimes I say those words to my Dove chocolate. I throw those three words out like moon pies at Mardi Gras. But who can forget the first time you felt that euphoric terror? That magical moment?
Ugggg, gross. It’s way too Twilight-y and Notebookish. In the trash it goes. I’ll just stick to travel stories.
