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June 2015 | YOUR COMMUNITY HUMOUR MAGAZINE | Issue 177
Memories of Sapperton Archie Miller and Wayne Wou share tales of this historic neighbourhood.
See feature on P11
Photo by Gabor Gasztonyi
20
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2
June 2015
Peter Julian, MP Burnaby – New Westminster Serving Our Community
Need help with federal issues such as E.I., Income Tax, Canada Pension and Canada Student Loan? Please contact Peter Julian’s Community office for assistance. Peter Julian’s Community Office: 7615 Sixth Street, Burnaby, BC V3N 3M6
Phone: 604-775-5707 l Email: peter.julian.c1@parl.gc.ca l www.PeterJulian.ca
Piffle Word Search P D M B W W F S N L Q W C N F
R S I E A T N N Z G K E C I J
Y P X W A Z L A T U O K L A W
H O N L W F I P M I N D K Y I
Q P K O O I A P B D L Q U O M
E C S I N I M E R A L Q Y Y S
R E Q G G R M U W N I O C M V
P E M I E O K Q V C D Z E Z F
E W M H L E O H Q E Y M Y H F
D V T E E Y H L I N O V W S T
U A O E M L Y R J R H U Y L P
F L S L C B F D I S U U P D D
V G L J J L E E R B G V B H R
V Y A V J J S R P S T M U E G
T O G E T H E R K I Z L R T N
FATHER GUIDANCE HUG LOVE MEMORIES POPS REMEMBER REMINISCE TALK THEOLDMAN TOGETHER WALK
Locally Owned & Published! Fourth floor, 604 Columbia St New Westminster, BC V3M 1A5
Chris Sargent 604-525-9027
Owner & Publisher Email: chrissargent@piffle.ca
Verne Siebert 604-763-6304 Vic Leach 778-237-0052 John Ashdown 604-657-5600 Email: sales@piffle.ca Graphic Design: Cliff Blank Email: production@piffle.ca Photography: Gabor Gasztonyi
piffle.ca
Serving the Community of New Westminster Our office can assist with provincial government issues such as MSP, income assistance and provincial disability, WorkSafe, and ICBC.
Judy Darcy, MLA
judy.darcy.mla@leg.bc.ca PHONE 604-775-2101
Judy Darcy’s Constituency Office is located at 737 Sixth St, New Westminster, V3L 3C6
To advertise, call 604-525-9027 or email sales@piffle.ca today!
June 2015
3
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June 2015
Ken McIntosh Rod Drown
HOW TO START THE DAY AND FEEL REALLY GOOD Open a new file on your computer.
Researchers
Entitle it ‘Housework.’
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Empty the Recycle Bin.
Place it in the Recycle Bin. Your computer will ask you, ‘Are you sure you
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SIGNS, SIGNS, EVERYWHERE THERE’S SIGNS At a barber shop: “Come in with one eyebrow, leave with two!” On a plumber’s truck: “We repair what your husband fixed.” On an electrician’s van: “We’ll remove your shorts!”
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June 2015
5
In a veterinarian’s office: “Back in 15
“I wouldn’t share my secret with just
minutes. Sit! Stay!”
anyone, “Simon replies, lowering his voice so
On the door to a proctologist’s office: “To expedite your visit, please back in.”
the other shoppers won’t hear.’ But since you’re a good and faithful customer, I’ll let you
On a septic tank business: “We’re #1 in the #2 business”
in on it. Fish heads. You eat enough of them, you’ll be positively brilliant.”
At a photo studio: “Have your kids shot
“You sell them here,” the customer asks,
while you wait!”
“Only $4 apiece,” says Simon.
In a clothing store: “Wonderful bargains for men with 16 and 17 necks.”
The customer buys three. A week later, he’s back in the store complaining that the fish
In a Mall: “Ears pierced, while you wait.”
heads were disgusting and he isn’t any smarter.
On a radiator repair garage: “Best place to take a leak.”
“You didn’t eat enough,” says Simon. The customer goes home with 20 more fish heads.
On a fixit-shop: We can fix anything!
Two weeks later, he’s back and this time he’s
(Please knock loudly, doorbell broken)
really angry. “Hey, Simon,” he complains, “you’re selling
HOW TO GET REALLY SMART
me fish heads for $4 a piece when I can buy
A customer at Stingray Fishmongers marvelled at the owner’s quick wit and intelligence.
the whole fish for $2. You’re ripping me off!” “You see,” says Simon, “you’re smarter
“Tell me, Simon, what makes you so smart?”
already.”
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June 2015
Serving New Westminster since 2003. We thank all of you for your continued support of the last nine years!
YOUR DIABETES RESOURCE CENTRE
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June 2015
7
LAW ENFORCEMENT RUNNERS LACE UP FOR SPECIAL OLYMPICS
much, much more. All proceeds benefit the Qayqayt Elementary School PAC to support field trips and extra curricular activities. For more information, email chair@qqpac.ca.
From June 2 to 5, law enforcement runners will take to the streets with a message of respect and inclusion as they lace up in communities around the Lower Mainland for the 2015 BC Law Enforcement Torch Run in support of Special Olympics BC.
HAIR TODAY, GONE TOMORROW: A HISTORY OF HAIR
In New Westminster, the run will take place on Friday, June 5 starting at the Justice Institute of B.C., 715 McBride Blvd. at 9:45 a.m. and conclude at the Transit Police Headquarters at 287 Nelson Crescent in Sapperton. More information: Phone 604-737-3056. Web www.specialolympics.bc.ca/letr Email cmccarthy@specialolympics.bc.ca
QAYQAYT COMMUNITY FESTIVAL June 6, 10:30 a.m. - 4:30 p.m. Tipperary Park, Queens and 4th St A day of FUN for the whole family! Carnival games, Literacy Tent, Cake Walk, Face Painting, Used Book Sale, Tumblebus, Play-dough, B a l l o o n M a s t e r, Martial Arts Demonstrations. Lions Club of New Westminster Panc ake Breakfast, Rotary Club of New Westminster BBQ, Cotton Candy, Popcorn Key West Ford Test Drive 4 UR School Key West Ford provides a $20 donation for each test drive applicant — one per household. Raffl es, Prizes and
June 13, 2:00 p.m. - 3:00 p.m. Anvil Centre Studio 417, 777 Columbia St Join popular fashion historian Ivan Sayers for a presentation about men’s and women’s hairstyles from the 1850s to the 1970s. From the wacky hairstyles of the 1800s to the hippies of the 1970s, Ivan will illustrate this fascinating history with slides, original hairpieces and a demonstration of hairstyles. $10.00. Call 604-527-4640 for mor information.
NEW WESTMINSTER FIREFIGHTERS’ CHARITABLE SOCIETY SHRED-A-THON June 20 10:00 a.m. - 2:00 p.m. Canada Games Pool Parking Lot, 65 E Sixth Ave Need to get rid of that stack of papers? Bring your paperwork and other confi dential materials and have them professionally shredded on site. Small businesses and homeowners are welcome. Be sure to stay for a barbeque, popcorn, entertainment, and much more! All proceeds going to the New Westminster Firefighters’ Charitable Society. For more information, please call 604-519-1000.
WEST END GARAGE SALE June 20, 9:00 a.m. - 3:00 p.m. West End Neighbourhood Anyone in the West End is encouraged to participate. Please email Matt Brabbins at info@mattbrabbins.ca to be included as a participant.
MON TO FRI 9AM-6PM | SAT 9AM-2:30PM | SUN 9AM-1:30PM
A seminar on time travel will be held two weeks ago.
8
June 2015
KID’S CORNER with
ISAIAH
AUTO WASH STARTING AT
Q: What do you call cheese that is not yours? A: Nacho cheese.
Q: Who can shave 10 times a day and still have a beard? A: A barber.
Q: What did the penny say to the other penny? A: We make perfect cents.
Q: Why does a milking stool have only 3 legs? A: Because the cow has the utter.
Q: Why did the man with one hand cross the road? A: To get to the second hand shop.
Q: What’s easy to get into but hard to get out of? A: Trouble.
Q: Why did the boy sprinkle sugar on his pillow before he went to sleep? A: So he could have sweet dreams.
Q: Why did the dinosaur cross the road? A: Because the chicken joke wasn’t invented yet.
Q: What goes up when the rain comes down? A: An umbrella.
Q: What kind of lights did Noah use on the Ark? A: Flood lights!
Q: Why did the belt go to jail? A: Because it held up a pair of pants!
Q: Why don’t you see giraffes in elementary school? A: Because they’re all in High School!
Q: Did you hear about the calendar thief? A: He got 12 months; they say his days are numbered. Q: What did the stamp say to the envelope? A: Stick with me and we will go places!
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Q: Which is the longest word in the dictionary? A: “Smiles”, because there is a mile between each “s”! Q: Which month do soldiers hate most? A: The month of March!
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A BRIAN WILSON SONG The Beach Boys walk into a bar. One says
OIL TANK REMOVAL
to the other “Round? Round? Get a round? I get a round?”
AT THE COURTHOUSE Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact? A: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
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HUBBY’S MISSING Last week, Vicky, a distraught wife went to the local police station, along with her nextdoor neighbour, Pauline, to report that her husband was missing. The policeman asked for a description of the missing man. Vicky described him clearly and in detail, “He is 35 years old, 6 ft 4 inches, has dark eyes,
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pounds, is softly-spoken and is fabulous with the children.” Pauline interrupts her protesting, “Why Vicky, your husband is 5 ft 8 inches, corpulent, bald, has a big mouth, and is horrid to your children.” Vicky replied, with a sigh, “Yes, but who wants HIM back?”
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June 2015
RULES FOR PROPER ENGLISH 1. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
15. Do not be redundant; do not use more words than necessary; it’s highly superfluous.
2. And don’t start a sentence with a conjunction.
16. One-word sentences? Eliminate. 17. Analogies in writing are like feathers on a
3. It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.
snake.
4. Avoid clichés like the plague (they’re old hat).
18. The passive voice is to be ignored.
5. Also, always avoid annoying alliteration.
19. Eliminate commas, that are, not
6. Be more or less specific.
necessary. Parenthetical words however
7. Remarks in brackets (however
should be enclosed in commas.
relevant) are (usually) (but not always) unnecessary.
20. Never use a big word when a diminutive one would suffice.
8. Also too, never, ever use repetitive redundancies.
21. Kill all exclamation points!!! 22. Use words correctly, irregardless of how
9. No sentence fragments.
others use them.
10. Contractions aren’t necessary and shouldn’t be used.
23. Understatement is always the absolute best way to put forth earth shaking ideas.
11. Foreign words and phrases are not apropos. 12. One should NEVER generalize. 13. Comparisons are as bad as clichés. 14. Don’t use no double negatives.
24. Use the apostrophe in it’s proper place and omit it when its not needed. 25. Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “I hate quotations. Tell me what you know.”
PICTOGRAPH BY ROSS HOOD
PUZ ZLE #20
The principle of this puzzle is to shade, in a logical way, boxes in the grid to discover a picture solution. Numbers on the left show the sets of boxes to be shaded in the corresponding line. Numbers above the grid show the sets of boxes to be shaded
26. If you’ve heard it once, you’ve heard it a thousand times: Resist hyperbole; not one writer in a million can use it correctly. 27. Puns are for children, not groan readers. 28. Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
in the corresponding column. There is always at least one clear box separating
29. Who needs rhetorical questions?
the shaded boxes. TIP: It is just as important to discover which boxes are clear.
30. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than
THIS ISSUE’S HINT: “BOW, WOW.”
understatement.
Solution to April 2015 | PUZ ZLE #19
PICTOGRAPH
BY ROSS HOOD
Find the solution in the next issue of Piffle. To advertise, call 604-525-9027 or email sales@piffle.ca today!
FE AT U R E STORY
11
Piffle’s MATH MADNESS
School at Major and Fader Streets, 1912. Photograph courtesy Archie Miller.
Memories of Sapperton by Gabor Gasztonyi
L
ast week just after the Hyack Parade I sat down on a quiet park bench across from Knox Presbyterian Church in Sapperton with long time New West historical guru and archivist Archie Miller and Wayne Wou. Wayne’s grandfather owned the grocery store on East Columbia Street for many years. Originally, it was on Columbia next to Eaton’s but moved further down into Sapperton in the late 1940’s after Wayne’s grandfather purchased it after the original owner retired. I remember that store being there almost forever. Wayne said folks in the area would drop in on a Friday night and buy their groceries for the week. He remembers many other grocery stores owned and operated by Chinese families in the Sapperton area. Looking out at the grass field and seeing a group of young children playing baseball on this cloudy afternoon, Wayne Wou remarked, “You know this field up to Columbia Street and beyond was once called “China Field.” He went on to say that, many Chinese families grew vegetables there for their use as well as for sale in the local corner stores. About five years ago Archie Miller, Wayne Wou and Carol McMeekin continued on page 14
Try to fill in the missing numbers. Use the numbers 1 through 9 to complete the equations. Each number is only used once. Each row is a math equation. Each column is a math equation. Remember that multiplication and division are performed before addition and subtraction. Find solution in the next Piffle!
Piffle’s NUMBER BLOCKS
Try to fill in the missing numbers. The missing numbers are integers between 0 and 9. The numbers in each row add up to totals to the right. The numbers in each column add up to the totals along the bottom. The diagonal lines also add up the totals to the right. Find solution in the next Piffle!
An unemployed court jester is no one’s fool.
12
June 2015 THE SLEEPLESS ACCOUNTANT An accountant is having a hard time sleeping and goes to see his doctor. “Doctor, I just can’t get to sleep at night.” The Doctor replied “Have you tried counting sheep?” The accountant stated “That’s the problem… I make a mistake and then spend three hours trying to find it.”
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SHOP THE SAPPERTON MERCHANTS SAPPERTON DAY, JUNE 14 11:00 a.m. - 5:00 p.m. ~ 400 Block E Columbia St
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Come join us to celebrate the beginning of summer and the deep history of the community. There will be live street performers, musical groups, bouncy castles, clowns, games, mini donuts, pancake breakfast, rock climbing wall, market place vendors and much, much, more. While there, make sure to see what the local merchants have to offer. Get a healthy, wholesome, meal served to you on a model train at Greens & Beans Deli. Enjoy the company of Leona Green and her friendly family and staff while enjoying a good meal or snack. Help raise money for the Royal Columbian Hospital through weekly meat draws held the Fraternal Order of Eagles at the Fireside Pub while enjoying the hospitality of this local establishment. Pizza is a fun celebration food and Le Pizzo Bella has a two for the price of one special. You will always find something you can use that will only cost you pocket change at Dollar Deals Dollar Store. Gino’s Restaurant has been serving up first class meals in the community for decades and very much a part of the Sapperton tradition. There is great chicken to be had at the new 7-Eleven along with a variety of other tasty snacks, hot & cold drinks and groceries. The new 7-Eleven has a number of tables and chairs that make it a great place to go to socialize with your neighbours. And get this! The 7-Eleven is 24/7. Looking to express how unique you are? Explore some options of body art at Royal City Tattoo. Say hello to the Chan family and feast on a fine selection of Chinese and Western food served up hot and tasty at Chan’s Garden. They have a great selection and great value. Swing by the Castle Neighbourhood Grill Restaurant & Public House. You will be treated like royalty at The Castle. Your small dog’s new best friend away from home is surely to become the staff at Wag ‘n’ Woof. If you like your dog to be sociable without having to go to the gym or join a dating site, then Wag ‘n’ Woof is for them. Their friends are already there. If you are at work, vacation or elsewhere and don’t want to deprive your loyal companion of love and attention, then please pop in at their very convenient location at 102-450 East Columbia Street in New Westminster. Aside from day-care for your dog, they also offer spa, boarding, grooming, training, K-9 gentle dental cleaning and a pet first aid course. You can also visit www.wagnwoofnewwest.com for full pricing.
Visit the Fraternal Order of Eagles in front of the Fireside Pub selling 50/50 tickets. All proceeds benefit
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14
June 2015
From the Poplars (an excerpt) © Cecily Nicholson
a view down from the brow of the hill sappers first waterfront settle on royal affiliations firm industry poised necessity curl dimensions lest we forget the colour of cranberry marshes cold, marrow-deep sound felt rumori dream am eristic sand in the freshet of spring stirs its names among other names, Stó:lo-
thought it would be a great idea to collect stories, photographs and memorabilia about the Sapperton area. Archie mentioned, “The older people with the older stories are slowly disappearing. It’s important to find ways of retaining this heritage, and we are trying to get it all together before it disappears.” Wayne went on to say, “Over the years we just get a single story and if they hadn’t told us — that memory might be gone.” It is in this detailed and painstaking manner that Archie, Wayne, and Carol are trying to preserve and display these great memories of the historic Sapperton neighborhood. Quite aptly, they refer to their group as, “Memories of Sapperton.” During the upcoming Sapperton Day Street Festival on Sunday June 14th from 11:00 am to 5:00 pm, Memories of Sapperton will have an exciting display on view at the Knox Presbyterian Church. The display begins around noon after the Church service. Archie, Wayne, and Carol will be displaying continued from page 11
PIFFLE’S Cecily Nicholson lives in New Westminster. She is the administrator of the artist-run centre, Gallery Gachet, and has worked since 2000 in the Downtown Eastside neighbourhood of Vancouver. She is the author of: Triage (2011) and From the Poplars (2014), winner of the 2015 Dorothy Livesay prize for poetry. Cecily will be reading this summer at Poetry in the Park on July 22. PIP runs every Wed eve, 6 to 8 p.m., at the Queen’s Park Bandshell, July 1 – August 26, Two Featured Poets & Open Mic. Everyone welcome.
HOW FAST CAN YOU GET THROUGH?
POET’S CORNER with
JANET KVAMMEN DIRECTOR, ROYAL CITY LITERARY ARTS SOCIETY Welcoming New Westminster Poets! Please submit your “New West” poems for this column by emailing Janet: janetkvammen@rclas.com To advertise, call 604-525-9027 or email sales@piffle.ca today!
June 2015
15
Personalized readings are a great gift for Dad! Call Liza for details today.
778-898-2146
HOROSCOPES by LIZA JUNE 2015 ARIES: Finish up those home renovations. By mid month friends are keeping you busy and entertainment is the main priority.
McBride School before it burned down 1926. Photograph courtesy Archie Miller.
mostly old photographs including the one Archie and Wayne are holding in our cover photograph of Vita Foods. Does anyone remember it? Drop in on Sapperton days, have a chat with Archie, Wayne or Carol, and tell them your stories about Vita Foods, McBride School and other Memories of Sapperton. They all have keen ears and want to talk you and get a lead into the many old photo albums still sitting in the homes of many Sapperton seniors. Do not forget there will be a great pancake breakfast starting at 10:00. I don’t want to miss that. There will be a bunch of other events as well including clowns, jugglers, games, live performances, minidonuts, rock climbing wall, vendors and much more. It is a great lead into summer. Keep in mind that all proceeds raised from the Sapperton Street Festival are donated to the Royal Columbian Hospital Foundation. end FOR SALE: 1983 YAMAHA XV500 VIRAGO 58K on the odometer. Battery one year old. New tires as of last year. Runs very well, and well maintained. Easy to handle, great to learn on. Excellent starter bike! Asking $1300. Price includes saddle bags, factory maintenance manual, and a spare seat.
Contact James at jmayer303@gmail.com.
TAURUS: You just want to have fun this month. Find a positive outlet for all that energy, your body will thank you for it. GEMINI: Think about saving money this month and keep your credit cards at home. It’s easy to overspend this month. CANCER: Employers are impressed with your hard work this month. Good time to ask for that raise. LEO : Your whole perspective on life/work changes for the better this month. Opportunity for travel may come up. V I R G O : Yo u m a y b e d e a l i n g w i t h t a xe s o r i n h e r i t a n c e s t h i s m o n t h . A w h o l e n ew understanding of yourself takes place. LIBRA: All partnerships will benefit you this month. You are not inclined to go it alone this month. SCORPIO: Your health and daily life will get that much needed boost this month. Others recognize your hard work. SAGITTARIUS: Expressing your true self will come easy for you this month. Friends and partners are keeping you busy. CAPRICORN: Home is where the heart is at this time. Now may be a good time for the decorating project. AQUARIUS: Now would be a good time to write that book you’ve been thinking about. Communications are clear and direct. PISCES: Your spending money as fast as you are making it this month. Keep those credit cards at home.
Any closet is a walk-in closet if you try hard enough.
To really optimize your results, I suggest adding resistance training to your cardio workout. This addition will help increase your lean body tissue without necessarily gaining bulk. The higher the proportion of lean tissue in your body, the faster your metabolic rate. In other words, your body becomes a more efficient “machine”,
Cardiovascular exercises like walking, running and swimming get your heart rate elevated and you start to burn calories immediately. However, there are several factors that determine just how effective your cardio workout is in burning fat — namely: level of intensity, duration and frequency of your workouts and the type of exercise you’re doing.
A.
I want to lose a bit of weight before getting into my bathing suit for the summer. I’m doing cardio almost every day with minimal results. I don’t want to lift weights because I want to lose weight, not gain size. What would you suggest I change?
Q.
Tara Lowry
If your question appears here, you can win great Dynamic Health and Fitness gear! So, in a nutshell, here’s how you make working out a fun habit in the spring/summer — plan ahead, just do it, set some goals, take it outside and take time to relax and enjoy
Resistance training, along with cardio and flexibility training, is an important tool you should use in order to achieve and maintain a healthy body weight. My fellow Dynamic Health and Fitness personal trainers and I can help you!
Once you start, you should work your body in balance — front to back, left to right and top to bottom. Work your bigger muscles like glutes and quads harder than your smaller muscles like triceps and calves. Work up to an appropriate level of intensity so you’ll see the benefits of your efforts while avoiding injury.
of a professional personal trainer — someone who can help you develop a program tailored to your fitness capabilities and goals.
Canfitpro PTS, FIS, NWL, CPR, Canfitpro, PRO TRAINER, Fitness Coordinator, Personal Trainer, Fitness instructor
by
Dynamic Health and Fitness
ASK AN EXPERT:
My fitness goals have never been certain exercises or milestones that I want to achieve, rather, I just want to be safe and help my body to recover. Within 4 sessions David solved many of the problems with my form that were likely contributing to my
I was so nervous to meet with him, because I had heard of trainers pushing clients really hard, and I knew that I just wasn’t capable of that. I was also really embarrassed by my physical limitations that I had worked so hard to disguise. Within one session David eased my fears – he did everything he could to make me comfortable, and took his time to figure out what I was capable of. Whenever I try an exercise and can’t do it, he quickly gives me an alternative that meets my needs. Most importantly, he gives me tons of information that helps me to protect my body even when he’s not around.
I joined Dynamic years ago, after a bad accident that lef t the lower half of my body severely damaged. The doctor told me that I had to stop running, dancing, and most other physical activities. However, I created a routine that allowed me to do yoga and basic cardio without causing, or so I thought, more damage. But after years of following this routine, my body seized last summer and I lost mobility in the lower half of my body. It was at this point that I decided to be more careful about how I approached my physical health. I found a chiropractor who put my body back together and then I hired David Ramirez — one of the personal trainers at Dynamic Fitness.
Name: Tracey Age: 35 Active Member Since: Sept 2010
If your question appears here, you can win great Dynamic Health and Fitness gear!
the sunny warmer weather — you will have earned it! problems, and I noticed a significant reduction in pain. I know that I couldn’t have done this without him, and his knowledge, never-ending encouragement and positive attitude. I will be forever grateful to him for what he has helped me to achieve, and the fact that I’m dancing again!
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If you haven’t tried resistance training, I suggest you start by seeking the advice
burning body fat for energy, not only during workouts but during your day-today activities.
18
June 2015
YOU KNOW YOU ARE GETTING OLD WHEN…
• You’re the life of the party, even if it lasts
• Your sweetie says, “Let’s go upstairs and
• You’re smiling all the time because you can’t
make whoopee” and you answer “Pick one, I can’t do both!”
until 8 PM. hear a thing anyone is saying. • You’re very good at telling stories over and
• You stop lying about your age and you start bragging about it.
over and over and over. • You’re aware that other people’s
• Your friends compliment you on your alligator shoes, but you’re barefoot. • You don’t care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don’t have to go along. • You are getting a little action today… but that means the fiber is working. • You think “getting lucky” means you find your car in the parking lot. • You think an “all-nighter” is not having to get up to pee.
grandchildren are not as cute as yours. • Everything either dries up or leaks. • You realize that aging is not for wimps. • You enjoy watching the news. • The phone rings and you hope it’s not for you. • The only reason you’re still awake at 4 am is indigestion. • People ask what color your hair USED to be.
• A sexy woman walks by and your pacemaker opens the garage door.
• You’re proud of your lawn mower. • You start singing along with the elevator music. • You’ve owned clothes so long that they’ve
Piffle’s NUMBER BLOCKS SOLUTION FROM THE PREVIOUS PIFFLE MAGAZINE
gone back into style… TWICE. • You consider coffee one of the most important things in life. • 8 AM is your idea of “sleeping in”. • You say the words, “Turn that music down!” • You point out what buildings used to be where. • You can’t remember the last time you lay on the floor to watch television. • You and your teeth don’t sleep together.
Piffle’s MATH MADNESS Canada has two national sports. Hockey is the national winter sport and lacrosse is the national summer sport. When did O, Canada officially become the national anthem?
a) 1880 b) 1920
c) 1950 d) 1980
SOLUTION FROM THE PREVIOUS PIFFLE MAGAZINE
To advertise, call 604-525-9027 or email sales@piffle.ca today!
June 2015
19
A Bit of Curiosity! T
Battle of the Curious, a fun, free and competitive event for both vendors and the public alike to bring their most unique and interesting items to be judged! Prizes are available for the most curious item submitted! Vintage clothes, and onsite alterations, First Nations’ art, and Chinese antiques. Everything unique and curious will be available, from the tiniest piece of antique jewelry, to the largest signs and furniture. There will be something for everyone! So please, find Curious Flea on Facebook and keep up to date with vendors and products!
he River Market is excited to announce the continuation of the Curious Flea Market, now coordinated by local artisan Bonnie Hammond, of Bits & Keys’! Curious Flea is an event which features local artisans and collectors who come together to provide an upscale bazaar of the unique and curious! It features objects which have been recycled and upcycled in unique and curious ways, antique and vintage items, and crafts inspired by times gone by. It is a shopping experience which is unique, in that it brings together all kinds of oddities and crafts in a friendly open setting. Curious Flea occurs surrounded by local shops and restaurants in the River Market once a month and continues to work to celebrate the community of New Westminster in featuring as much local content as possible! Bonnie is bringing together her extensive experience as a market vendor, with her event planning skills and experience and is looking forward to hosting a family friendly event where our community can browse and shop in comfort. She is looking forward to themed days in the winter months Discover, explore, and satisfy your curiosity at the Curious Flea. This isn’t your grandmother’s flea market. Retro chic, mid century where people can shop ‘white furnimodern, 50’s kitsch, up-cycled treasures, steampunk finds, and ture’ or ‘stuff inspired by robots’ and everything in between grace our curious halls. is always looking for new people to An appraiser is available onsite to help you figure out what fabulously curious treasures you may have! add to the extraordinary selection of current vendors. Artisans will be Now organized by Bits and Keys. This season’s flea promises to be featured in the upstairs and downeven bigger and better! There’s always something to discover at the Curious Flea! stairs area and will also be featuring an outdoor portion! CURIOUS FLEA DATES FOR 2015! Her company Bits & Keys’ features jewellery made locally from bits and June 14th, July 5th, August 22nd & 23rd pieces of upcycled and recycled “stuff”. She takes apart watches, uses old keys, SATURDAY 10am - 5pm SUNDAY 11am - 4pm drills holes in coins and repurposes FREE General Admission porcelain dollhouse tea sets and beads. For more info visit: Lockets and beer bottle opener’s sit @rivermrkt river market.ca/events @curiousflea side by side at this table as jewelry often meets function in her creative process. She can also upgrade single earrings and broken jewelry to make them wearable again and will gladly 810 Quayside Drive, New Westminster, BC 604.520.3881 customize things onsite. Onsite will be an appraiser of the so are you curious enough to check it out? rare, old and curious as well as the
?
As I said before, I never repeat myself.
20
June 2015
MAGIC PENNY
• Ear New Zulland: an extinct airline
After putting their three-year-old child Brian
• Beers: large savage animals found in U.S.
in bed, his parents heard muffled sobs coming
forests
from his room one night. Rushing back in, they
• Peck: to fill a suitcase
found that the child was crying hysterically
• Min: male of the species
when he saw them. He told his parents that
• Milburn: capital of Victoria
he had accidentally swallowed a penny and
• Pig: for hanging out washing with
was sure that he would die now. The father,
• Pug: large animal with a curly tail
in an attempt to sober him down, took out a
• Nin tin dough: computer game
penny from his pocket and pretended to pull
• Munner stroney: soup
it out from Brian’s ear. The child was really
• Mess Kara: eye makeup
thrilled and stopped crying at once. In a flash,
• McKennock: person who fixes cars
he snatched the penny from his dad’s hand,
• Mere: Mayor
swallowed it, and then cheerfully demanded,
• Leather: foam produced from soap
“Do it again, Dad!”
• Lift: departed • Kiri Pecker: famous Australian businessman
LEARN TO SPEAK NEW ZEALAND
• Ken’s: Cairns
• This is duffy cult: not easy
• Jumbo: pet name for someone called Jim
• Bun button: been bitten by insect
• Jungle Bills: Christmas carol
• Beard: a place to sleep
• Inner me: enemy
• Sucks Peck: Half a dozen beers
• Guess: vapour
We can’t wait to host your next event.
Sapperton Pensioners’ Hall
can accommodate up to 275 people and is perfect for weddings, dances, dinners, fundraisers, birthday parties, lunches, reunions, memorials, craft markets, filming, meetings, and displays.
• 14' x 25' stage, P/A system, upright piano • 3,500 sq. ft. of open area upstairs with a hardwood floor
• Downstairs has 3,500 sq. ft., linoleum floor, kitchen facilities
• Parking for 30 cars, close to Sapperton SkyTrain Station
• Less than 5 minutes from Pattullo Bridge or Hwy #1 exit
S A PPERTON P ENSIONERS ’ H A LL
318 Keary St, New Westminster • Call 604-522-0280 to book your space today To advertise, call 604-525-9027 or email sales@piffle.ca today!
June 2015
21
• Fush: marine creatures • Ever cardeau: avocado
SIGNS THAT YOU SPEND TO MUCH TIME ON THE COMPUTERS • You try to enter your password on the microwave. • You email your son in his room to tell him that dinner is ready, and he emails you back, ‘What’s for dinner dad?’ • Your daughter sets up a web site to sell Girl Scout Cookies. • You chat several times a day with a stranger from South Africa, but you haven’t spoken to your next door neighbor yet this year.
FINAL TOUCH Q: What do you call two people who do not hesitate to embarrass you in front of your friends?
EMERGENCY EXITS — NOT JUST FOR ESCAPING FIRES Exit doors are commonly thought only as a way out in case of fire, but they are also means to EXIT DANGEROUS LIFE-THREATENING SITUATIONS that may not be about a
A: Mum and Dad!
fire. Because we never think a fire will ever happen to us, businesses have a tendency to neglect these doors or lock them to prevent break ins. We don’t think that other situations
Royal
City
CHIROPR ACTIC Dr. P.G. Campbell D.C.
may occur where one may need to flee from a potential threat, such as an intruder or assailant. If the emergency exit is blocked or you need to read instructions to open the door, your way to safety is delayed when seconds count.
BYLAW SNIPPET YOU SHOULD KNOW…
FIRE PROTECTION BYLAW NO. 6940, 2004 Section 22 – Every occupier of premises shall keep exit doors in good operating condition and repair and in compliance with the current BC Building Code. Exit doors shall open freely without the use of any special knowledge. Fire doors shall be kept closed at all times to protect means of egress from smoke and flame. If an occupier fails to comply with the requirements of this section, they may be issued a Municipal Ticket Information under the City’s Municipal Ticket Information Bylaw for a fine in the amount specified in that bylaw.
Suite
a p p Bo o k o in in g no t m en w! ts
110-846 20th St.
New Westminster Fire & Rescue Services Fire Prevention Office, 1 East 6th Avenue, New Westminster, BC V3L 4G6
www.newwestcity.ca
Do not put statements in the negative form.
22
June 2015
Homecoming: These Glorious Years A Performance Celebrating 65 Incredible Years! Directed by Dolores Kirkwood
65
Years old and not even close to retiring! Join The Massey Theatre on Sunday, June 14th at 7:30 p.m. in celebrating its 65th anniversary with a Gala Performance of cherished performers who share a history with the Massey who will be reunited and revive memorable performances and moments on the stage. The Massey, located at 735 Eighth Ave in New Westminster is a Metro Vancouver landmark. Over its 65 years the 1260 seat Massey Theatre has stayed true to its mission of nurturing and supporting the performing arts on many levels with respect and integrity. It has been vital to not only to the community of New Westminster but to
Serving Smiles to the Lower Mainland Subscription Form Name Address
City Province Phone Email
Postal
❑ 1 Year ($50 + $2.50 TAX)* ❑ New ❑ Renewal ❑ Send me the FREE digital version too! Subscription Start M M / Y Y Y Y Make payments to “Sargent’s Publishing” Piffle Subscription Manager 4th Floor, 604 Columbia St New Westminster, BC V3M 1A5 *Subscription rate has increased due to Canada Post’s announced increase in stamp prices.
the Metro Vancouver region as a whole by being a catalyst for the performing arts and enriching its vibrant expressive community. The Gala performance with over 100 performers will be a snapshot of what makes the Massey unique. Encouraging and nurturing talent to reach for their dreams continues to be a driving force of the Massey along with supporting community groups and festivals. It has helped launch professional careers such as Charlotte Diamond, Jeff Hyslop and Susan Anderson to name a few, and continues today to promote budding careers of Thomas Lamont, who just played Freddie in My Fair Lady to supporting diverse classical artists like Cassis Khan, esteemed Indian musician, and Ryan Zhiu, piano prodigy. The Gala is being directed by Order of BC recipient and esteemed local artistic director Dolores Kirkwood, cofounder of both Royal City Musical Theatre and Royal City Youth Ballet. As you can imagine there is boundless talent in the over 80 performers who are thrilled to bring these great memories back to life. The evening will include performances from across the eras by some of British Columbia’s great talents performing some of the hits over the years with musical accompaniment by the 18 piece Royal City Musical Theatre Orchestra conducted by James Bryson. • Charlotte Diamond • Jeff Hyslop • Susan Anderson • Sara-Jeanne Hosie • John Payne • Colleen Winton • Matt Palmer
To advertise, call 604-525-9027 or email sales@piffle.ca today!
June 2015
23
• Cassius Khan and Amika Kushwaha • Kazumi Evans and Matt Baker • Thomas Lamont • Julia MacLean • Royal City Youth Ballet • Revivals of Royal City Musical Theatre’s big production numbers including: the orphans from Annie, Hello, Dolly! The Will Rogers Follies, A Chorus Line, West Side Story, My Fair Lady, and 42nd Street. • Goh Ballet with the Grand Pas de Deux from Don Quixote The evening also includes a performance by Canada’s internationally acclaimed beloved singer and songwriter Charlotte Diamond. Charlotte’s career was launched from the Massey Theatre through her earlier teaching career. Charlotte’s debut album, 10 Carrot Diamond, won the Juno Award (equivalent of a Grammy)! 10 Carrot Diamond became a Certified Gold Record in Canada and also won a Parents’ Choice Classic Award and an American Library Association Award in the U.S.A. Her career turned professional and international overnight! Songs such as, “Four Hugs a Day”, “Each of us is a Flower”, “Octopus” (Slippery Fish) and “I am a Pizza” started to become a regular part of classroom and family life. Today the Massey is as dynamic as ever in fulfilling its unique role as a facilitator of educational, community and professional performing arts — a catalyst for an expressive community and a stage where any dream is possible, since 1949. It continues to be fertile ground for community groups, competitions, festivals, student performances, large scale musical theatre and ballets, and, international performers of note. Over 200 events are presented at the Massey Theatre each season. This is a celebration of 65 glorious years — for the whole family, for the whole community. Tickets $17 Adults. $14 Students and Seniors. $7 children 12 and under. Circular Definition: see Definition, Circular.
24
June 2015 BREAKFAST • LUNCH • DINNER • DAILY SPECIALS
604-524-8118 Open 7 days a week!
636 Sixth Street Mon to Sat 7am – 8pm New Westminster Sun/Holidays 8am – 8pm
wafflehouserestaurant.com
10% OFF* CanEngrave
for Piffle Advertisers
10% OFF*
Piffle Advertising for CanEngrave Customers
Printing
Business Cards, Flyers, Brochures, Posters, Forms, Manuals
Promotional Products T-shirts, Pens, Notepads, Trinkets
Signs & Banners
Full Colour, Die Cut Vinyl, Vehicle Decals, Sandwich Boards
Engraving
Namebadges, ID Cards, Room Signs, Door Plaques
Trophies & Awards
Plaques, Cups, Crystal, Ribbons *Discount on $100 minimum purchase
SALES:
John Ashdown 604-657-5600 johnashdown@piffle.ca
Signs & Printing
601 Queens Ave, New West
604 521-1295
To advertise, call 604-525-9027 or email sales@piffle.ca today!
June 2015
25
Clairvoyants meeting cancelled due to unforeseen events.
26
June 2015 WHAT IS HIS OCCUPATION? A grade school teacher was asking students what their parents did for a living. "Tim, you be first," she said. "What does your mother do all day?" Tim stood up and proudly said, "She's a doctor." "That's wonderful. How about you, Amie?" Amie shyly stood up, scuffed her feet and said, "My father is a mailman." "Thank you, Amie," said the teacher. "What about your father, Billy?" Billy proudly stood up and announced, "My daddy murders people, steals from them, and drinks." The teacher was aghast and promptly changed the subject to geography. Later that day she went to Billy's house and rang the bell. Billy's father answered the door. The teacher explained what his son had said and asked if there might be some logical explanation. Billy's father said, "I'm actually an attorney. But how can I explain a thing like that to a sevenyear-old?"
Rotary’s Walk To End Polio Now
Join us and
30 YEARS FIGHTING • 3 COUNTRIES REMAIN
The Rotary, Rotaract and Interact Clubs of Burnaby, Deer Lake, Metrotown, New Westminster and Cambie
Saturday, June 27th, 2015 The walk starts from Metrotown Mall Parking Lot (Nelson and Kingsway) and ends at Pier Park at the New Westminster Quay Registration: 9:00 am Walk begins: 10:00 am Closing Ceremony: 12:00 pm
Registration fee: $10
For more info or to register: 604-802-0890 or TKY.Lung@telus.com
To advertise, call 604-525-9027 or email sales@piffle.ca today!
June 2015
27
Novina Bella, Owner
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Houses & Condos • Offices & Show Homes Special Seniors Discount includes Cooking • Move Ins & Move Outs Before & After Parties • Professional Organizing Interior Decor • Bonded, Licensed & Insured “Over 20 Years Experience Providing Outstanding Services” 200% Satisfaction Guaranteed!
Cleaning, Organizing, Decorating, Moving, Parties… WE DO IT ALL! • bellahometel@shaw.ca • Like Us on Facebook!
TOP TEN THINGS YOU'LL NEVER HEAR A DAD SAY
5. Your Mother and I are going away for the weekend… you might want to consider
10. Well, how 'bout that?...
throwing a party.
I'm lost! Looks like we'll
4. Well, I don't know what's
have to stop and ask for
wrong with your car. Probably
directions.
one of those doo-hickey
9. You know Pumpkin, now
thingies… you know… that
that you're thirteen, you'll be
makes it run or something. Just
ready for unchaperoned car
have it towed to a mechanic
dates. Won't that be fun?
and pay whatever he asks.
8. I noticed that all your
to live under this roof without
yours" attitude… I like that.
an earring… now quit your
7. Here's a credit card and
wanna play football? Figure
the mall. 2. Whaddya wanna go and get a job for? I make plenty of money for you to spend.
skating not good enough for you, son?
IWONA PIEROGIES
belly-aching, and let's go to
the keys to my new car… GO 6. What do you mean you
JOIN US FOR FATHER’S DAY!
3. No son of mine is going
friends have a certain "up
CRAZY.
1. Father's Day? aahh… don't worry about that… it's no big deal.
And the #1 thing…
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ONLY
25
$
BUSINESS DIRECTORY
/issue Contact John today!
Phone: 604-657-5600 • Email: johnashdown@piffle.ca Our small prices will leave you with a…
HOUSEKEEPERS NEEDED! Merry Maids is a growing business and needs hard working, trustworthy, and dedicated friendly staff. Completive wages offered. Apply at #426-604 Columbia St, New West
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Reach thousands of local customers. Call 604-525-9027 to advertise today!
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e “Mr Tub Yoyo Thrower ” on You
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COIN LAUNDRY SERVICES Laundry drop-off services
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Lessons,
802 20 St, New West
Birthday Parties, Yoyo Performances!
778-789-1117 mryoyothrower@gmail.com
www.mryoyothrower.com
Freedomfire Full Gospel International Ministries ❖ International Ministries ❖ Youth and Children’s Sunday School ❖ School of Leaders / G12 Vision / Encounter God Retreats ❖ Weekly Home Cell Meetings 64 8th St New Westminster Email: freedomfireband@telus.net revival@telus.net Office: 604-558-5824 Cell: 604-877-0662
Tel: 778-397-0896 Open 7 days a week 9:30 AM – 7:00 PM
Serving Smiles to the Lower Mainland
www.piffl e.ca
FREE SCRAP CAR
REMOVAL FILTHY PHIL & HIS DUMMER BROTHER
AUTO HAULING SURREY, BC
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604-603-9004
Mount Calvary Lutheran Church 701 - 6th St, New Westminster Divine Service & Sunday School: 11:00 am Sundays
Rev. James K. Kim
Tel: 604-521-2007
“Good clean cars, reasonably priced!”
301-12th St, New West
604-377-5889
43 6th St,
New Westminster OPEN 7 DAYS A WEEK 9:30AM – 6:30PM
604.525.4566
renbooks@telus.net renaissancebookstore.com
To advertise, call 604-525-9027 or email sales@piffle.ca today!
Knox Presbyterian Church
403 E Columbia St, New West
604.524.6712
The Rev. Richard Watson, Minster
Regular Sunday Service at 11am
June 2015
29 FILIPINOS PASS IT ON… IPASA CONCERT FEATURING THE KP KIDS Internationally recognized Filipino Performing Folk Arts Group, Kababayang Pilipino (KP) celebrates its 22nd anniversary in a special presentation, “Ipasa” on June 28th, 2015 at the New Westminster’s Massey Theatre. The Metro-Vancouver based group will showcase the beloved folk dances and music of the Philippines. “Ipasa” is literally translated as “to pass on” and will prominently feature the future on stage with the
Publisher Chris Sargent’s favourite star, wife Flavia Sargent, poses with Lyca, Sarah and Jon. Photo by Gabor Gasztonyi
Sarah Geronimo
T
he Filipino community was treated to top entertainment at a concert headlined by Filipino superstar Sarah Geronimo. She preformed recently to a sold out audience at New Westminster’s Massy Theatre. Geronimo started a career in music after winning the television singing contest Star for a Night in 2003. Since that time, she has risen to stardom as a multitalented singer, actress, television personality and humanitarian.
Sarah was born in New Westminster’s Sister City, Quezon City, The Philippines. She was joined on stage by ten year old Lyca Jane Gairanod, a Filipina headliner child singer and actress. The crowd responded with tears of joy, and later, tears of laughter as they enjoyed the antics of funny man Jon Santos. Santos, is a Filipino comedian, actor, and impersonator.
Cole’s Law: Thinly sliced cabbage.
young performing artists of the group, “KP Kids”. With an ensemble of over 60 members comprised mainly of first generation Filipinos, Kababayang Pilipino is dedicated to the promotion and preservation of the Filipino folk heritage through its presentation of dance and music. Show time is 4:00 p.m. on June 28 at the Massy Theatre, 735 Eighth Avenue, New Westminster. Office: 604-5175900. Ticket Centre: 604-521-5050. Email: info@masseytheatre.com.
30
June 2015
Sylvia Jordi, LPN, BBA
Foot Care Nurse
Honestly driven.
House Calls Care Homes Hospitals
604 341 4378 604-517-1230 oktirenw@shaw.ca
Email: Info@FootCareHomeCall.com Website: FootCareHomeCall.com
325A 12th Street New Westminster
Check out our seasonal specials! ANDREW LOCHHEAD, GM
O, Canada didn’t officially become Canada’s national anthem until 1980, 100 years after it was written!
LEGION NO.2 MEAT BINGO THURS AT 8PM
FRI IS FREE SNACK NIGHT!
PIZZA SATURDAY FROM 6:45PM $2/1 SLICE • $3/2 SLICES
631 SIXTH STREET, NEW WESTMINSTER
NORM RICHARDS
LONE STRANGERS
FRI & SAT, JUNE 19 & 20 FRI & SAT, JUNE 26 & 27
MEGA MEAT DRAW!
SUNDAYS AT 3, 4 & 5PM
KARAOKE WITH CAL DONNELLY THURS & FRI AT 6:30PM
MEAT DRAWS: FRI 5PM, 6PM & 6:45PM SAT 4:30PM, 5:30PM, 6:30PM Royal Canadian Legion No.2, 604-522-4522
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June 2015
31
DEAR DAD An old father living alone in the country wanted to plant his pepper garden, but the ground was too hard and he was too old to do the work. His only son who use to help him was in prison for robbing a bank. The old man wrote a letter to his son and mentioned his situation: "Dear Jake, I’ve been very depressed lately because it looks like I won’t be able to plant my peppers this year. You know how much your mother loved planting peppers this time of year, but I’m just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. I know if you were here my troubles would have been over. I know you would have been happy to dig the plot for me." Love, Dad A few days later he received a letter from his son: "Dear Dad, Don’t dig up that garden! That’s where I buried the THINGS!" Love, Jake At 4:00 a.m. the next morning, FBI agents and local police arrived and dug up the entire area looking for the THINGS. They apologized to the old man after not finding anything and left. The next day the old man received another letter from his son. "Dear Dad, Happy Fathers Day! Go ahead and plant your peppers now. That’s the best I could do under the circumstances." Love, Jake
Dan Murphy
OWNER / PERSONAL TRAINER m. 604-349-8042 e. danmurphyfitness@gmail.com w. www.danmurphyfitness.ca 2020 Haro Street Vancouver, BC V 6G 1J3
Did you hear? They took the word gullible out of the dictionary!
L
ongevity Pharmacy
located in the heart of New Westminster, inside of the beautiful Polo Health + Longevity Centre which is a wellness clinic with a multidisciplinary, integrative and holistic approach to preventative health care. Our ability to prepare custom medications allows us to dispense them in various forms such as lozenges, lotions, creams, suppositories, transdermal gels and more. In addition, we can also follow a doctor’s unique prescription to make a medication stronger or weaker as it best fits each patient, or even add a preferred flavouring.
The only Certified Compounding Pharmacy in New Westminster filling all types of prescriptions… including pets! 604-544-7760 | 711 Columbia St, New Westminster
www.LongevityPharmacy.ca
Because preparation of custom medications requires special training and certification, our pharmacists have extensive training and expertise in compounding techniques. Our staff is a part of a network of pharmacists, physicians, and professional organizations that allow us to stay abreast of new innovations and changes in the pharmaceutical community.
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Chose from a wide selection of quality cards for Father’s Day at $1.99! 420 E COLUMBIA ST, NEW WEST
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