QSaltLake Magazine - Issue 318 - December, 2020

DECEMBER, 2020 VOL. 17 • ISSUE 318 QSALTLAKE.COM

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ISSUE 318 | DECEMBER, 2020

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6 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NEWS

news The top national and world news since last issue you should know

BY CRAIG OGAN

Nevada votes to enshrine same-sex marriage The Nevada Question 2 referendum passed with widespread support, enshrining marriage equality in Nevada’s constitution to reflect the law of the land established by the United States Supreme Court decision Obergefell v. Hodges.

It is the first time same-sex marriage was upheld in a constitutional amendment.

“The people have spoken, sending a clear message to the state of Nevada that LGBTQ equality is a priority for voters,” said Human Rights Campaign Nevada State Director Briana Escamilla. “Tonight’s vote sends a clear message to elected leaders across the country that LGBTQ equality is a winning issue.”

Philly stake on gay adoption The U.S. Supreme Court heard a one-hour oral argument via teleconference over a dispute about Philadelphia’s refusal to place children in foster care with an agency that prohibits same-sex couples from applying as foster parents. This is the first major case heard by incoming Justice Amy Coney Barrett. It is an appeal

by Catholic Social Services about a ruling by Philadelphia’s insistence that all of its contractors adhere to the city’s nondiscrimination ordinance

Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 318 | DECEMBER, 2020

which contains LGBT inclusive language. CCS claims the agency should be able not to work with same-sex couples on foster and adoption issues based on religious grounds.

Texas social workers The Texas State Board of Social Work Examiners repealed a recent policy that allowed Texas social workers to refuse to work with LGBTQ people and people with disabilities.

The policy allowing discrimination was pushed by the Texas governor and attorney general to bring the industry into alignment with the state’s religious liberty laws. The new regulation, in effect for just 90 days, received significant pushback from the social work community, industry groups, and the Texas legislature. The TSBWE — which oversees several mental health licensing organizations in the state — voted unanimously to restore the protections.

Pride In Taiwan About 130,000 people came together in Taiwan to celebrate Pride with traditional parades and festivals. It was possible for mass gatherings as the country has been one of the most successful at eradicating the COVID-19 pandemic, going over 200 days without any new cases. Taiwanese president Tsai Ing-Wen used social media to urge the entire nation to embrace “love, tolerance, and a better Taiwan.”

The country is one of few in Asia with an open LGBT community. It legalized marriage equality in 2019, and the 2020 Pride celebration was held the day after the Taiwan military sanctioned the first-ever same-sex marriage, officiated in a mass outdoor wedding of 200 couples.

Cleve Jones: There goes the Gayborhood Gay rights pioneer and advocate Cleve Jones has turned his attention to the changing nature of LGBT life. In an interview with The Advocate, he notes the irony of his efforts may have led to a change in the community — like the “end of gay bars” — as one result of mainstreaming LGBT people.

He is concerned about the loss of the LGBT neighborhoods to the forces of gentrification.

Jones worries specifically about the people who are in his cohort “aging gay men and LGBT seniors” who are moving to the suburbs and more rural areas because they have become more welcoming or have been forced to for economic reasons.

He said, “Cities were once a refuge for immigrants, bohemians, and gay people where affordable, sometimes sub-standard housing was plentiful.” Where does that just-out teen go to escape small-town/home-town discrimination when rents are $3000 a month in the Castro, he asks.

SD gets gay mayor This week, a candidate who said, “Being gay is a superpower,” became the first LGBT person elected mayor of San Diego. Todd Gloria is a member of the California State Assembly and served as interim mayor in 2013–14. He won a large plurality in a crowded field of eight other candidates with 41 percent of the vote.

The next highest vote-getter

received 23 percent. Todd is a long-time San Diego resident with Filipino heritage.

Falwell scandal gets creepier If you thought the Jerry Falwell, Jr. sex scandal couldn’t be creepier, think again.

According to a former Liberty University student, Falwell and his wife allegedly had a game they played where they would rank students based on how much they wanted to have sex with them. The former student is a friend of Falwell’s son and claims to be one of Mrs. Falwell’s paramours. She told him about how she and her husband loved to stroll around campus and point out all the young men they’d like to “bone together.” The Falwells have said the reports are “100 percent false.”

Ying and yang in movies One doesn’t mind “straight-washing,” the other eschews “gay-washing” — That’s Entertainment! Aragon in Lord of the Rings actor Viggo Mortensen is playing a gay man in a production he wrote, produced, directed, and stars in called Falling. Out gay actor and writer, Wentworth Miller, who has played it straight in Fox Network’s Prison Break and in superhero-TV on The Flash, Batwoman, and DC Legends, announced he is leaving the Fox drama series and wants to focus on playing gay characters.

Mortensen’s part was originally written as a straight man, but during production found changing the character to having a same-sex marriage made dramatic sense in a movie about changing minds about tolerance and aging.

Quipped Miller, “I just don’t want to play straight characters. If you’re hot and bothered [because] you fell in love with

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a fictional straight man played by a real gay one, that’s your work.” Falling tells the story of the Mortensen character’s racist and homophobic father showing early signs of dementia who moves in with his son.

“Secretary” Pete

McCaskill errs

That political heartthrob Mayor Pete Buttigieg had a high profile but unsuccessful run for the 2020 Democratic presidential nomination and was a well-liked surrogate for the sequestered Democratic candidate on interview shows.

He is now being considered for a cabinet-level post in the next presidential administration.

Media is touting him for ambassador to the United Nations — a job the former mayor has reportedly told friends he’d like. He is also mentioned for Housing and Urban Development, the head of Veterans Affairs, or the Office of Management and Budget.

Former Missouri Senator Claire McCaskill apologized for seemingly blaming “gay marriage” and “right[s] for transsexuals” for suppressing the pollster-promised “blue wave” of Democratic wins, other than the successful Democratic presidential candidate.

In a Twitter apology, she apologized for her MSNBC election night commentary, “The Republican Party, I think, very adroitly adopted cultural issues as part of their main theme, whether you’re talking guns or issues surrounding the right to abortion in this country or things like gay marriage and the right for transsexuals

and other people who we as a party has tried to quote-unquote look after and make sure that they’re treated fairly.”

Within hours of the appearance, McCaskill apologized on Twitter for using a “hurtful term,” saying she was “tired.”

News Agency. “They’re children of God and have a right to a family. Nobody should be thrown out or be made miserable over it.

“What we have to create is a civil union law. That way they are legally covered.”

Pope says same-sex unions, not marriage, good

UK sees an HIV diagnosis drop

In an unprecedented move, Pope Francis recently expressed support of civil unions for same-sex couples, according to the Catholic News Agency.

The Pope’s comments, first heard in Francesco, a documentary produced by filmmaker Evgeny Afineevsky, are a historic move for the Catholic Church. The documentary premiered at the Rome Film Festival in October.

“Homosexual people have a right to be in a family,” the Pope said in the documentary as reported by the Catholic

Public Health England reported the total number of people newly diagnosed with HIV decreased by more than 440 in 2019 to 4,139. This was a significant decrease from 6,312 in 2014. The decline in new HIV diagnoses is largely driven by a fall in diagnoses among gay and bisexual men, from 3,214 in 2014 and 2,079 in 2018 to 1,700 in 2019. New HIV diagnoses among people who acquired HIV through heterosexual contact also declined to 1,559 in 2019 from 1,664 in 2018. Q

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8 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NEWS

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ISSUE 318 | DECEMBER, 2020

A record number of LGBTQ candidates, winners, this election Self-identified LGBTQ voters represented 7 percent of the electorate in the United States election that occurred Nov. 3, according to exit polling from Edison Research, which compiles demographic information for every U.S. election for many of the mainstream television news networks and The New York Times. It is the the highest percentage in any election since the LGBTQ vote was first recorded in 1996.

A surprising 28 percent of LGBTQ voters went for President Donald Trump’s re-election, which was cause for celebration for conservative LGBTQ groups. President-elect Joe Biden received 61 percent of the LGBTQ vote and 11 percent went for candidates of other political parties.

LGBTQ voters backed Hillary Clinton over Trump in 2016 with a 78–14 margin.

LGBTQ Candidates The national LGBTQ Victory Fund, an organization that provides campaign, fundraising, and communications support to LGBTQ candidates, says that a record 574 queer candidates were on ballots across the country this year.

At press time, more than 220 of these candidates have already claimed victory, with many contests yet to be called.

Congress A record total of 26 openly LGBTQ candidates for U.S. Senate or House were on the ballot, and 11 — nine in the House and two in the Senate — are projected to win their races.

New York elected the first two openly gay Black candidates to serve in Congress.

Ritchie Torres and Mondaire Jones, both Democrats, will begin their terms this January.

All seven LGBTQ incumbents, all Democrats, won re-election, including Rhode Island’s David Cicilline New Hampshire’s Chris Pappas, Wisconsin’s Mark Pocan, Minnesota’s Angie Craig, California’s Mark Takano, New York’s Sean Patrick Maloney, and Kansas’ Sharice Davids.

Openly lesbian senators Tammy Baldwin, D-Wisc., and Kyrsten Sinema, D-Ariz., were not up for re-election.

State Elections At press time, 124 of 240 LGBTQ candidates for state legislative races had won their races, including nearly 40 who were not incumbents.

“LGBTQ candidates made historic inroads in state legislatures across the country, winning in states and chambers where we never have before,” Annise Parker, president of the LGBTQ Victory Fund, said in a statement. “Trans candidates, in particular, had unprecedented victories, including electing our first trans state senator and almost doubling the number of trans state legislators. These down-ballot victories reflect where America stands on the inclusion of LGBTQ people in our nation’s politics and each one represents an important step forward on the march toward equality.”

Delaware elected two LGBTQ candidates for the first time, with Sarah McBride to the state Senate and Eric Morrison and Marie Pinkney to the state House. McBride’s win also makes her the first openly transgender person elected to any state Senate in the U.S. “I hope tonight shows an LGBTQ kid that our democracy is big enough for them, too,” McBride, tweeted election night after the race was called as she received 91 percent of the vote.

In Alaska, which has never had an LGBTQ state legislator, the results are still too close to call, with lesbian Lyn Franks trailing in the race by 148 votes as of Friday, Nov. 13.

Openly gay Black Democrat Torrey Harris won his race for Tennessee state house, as did openly gay Republican Eddie Mannis. They are the first openly LGBTQ state legislators in Tennessee.

Only two other states — Louisiana and Mississippi — have never elected an LGBTQ state legislator.

Black LGBTQ candidates are also being elected in record numbers. In addition to Tennessee’s Torry Harris, Kim Jackson will be the first LGBTQ person elected to the Georgia Senate; Jabari Brisport is the first openly LGBTQ person of color elected to the New York State Legislature; and two Delaware openly lesbian candidates won

Sarah McBride, Delaware State Senator-elect

their races for the Delaware legislature, Tiara Mack in the state senate and Marie Pinkney in the state general assembly.

Transgender state legislative representation builds from four to seven after this election. Along with McBride’s win in Delaware, Vermont’s Taylor Small won her state house election, becoming the first transgender person in that state’s legislature.

The first out transgender person of color to be elected to a state legislature in the nation is Kansas’ Stephanie Byers.

Three incumbent transgender legislators — New Hampshire’s Lisa Bunker and Gerri Cannon and Colorado’s Brianna Totone — all won their re-elections.

Local Todd Gloria is the first out LGBTQ person to be elected San Diego Mayor.

In Alaska, Austin Quinn-Davidson became the first openly LGBTQ mayor in Anchorage after the incumbent resigned in October.

Charmaine McGuffey was elected Hamilton County, Ohio Sheriff, defeating her former boss whom, McGuffey said fired her for being lesbian.

Out lesbian Kristin Graziano was elected Charleston County, South Carolina, Sheriff, the first woman to ever hold the job.

“Not only are these wins historic, but they’re a sign of positive change in law enforcement spaces. Both Charmaine and Kristin took on an old-boys network that thrived on abuse, Victory Fund representatives said in a statement. “Both women made police and prison reform pillars of their campaigns and have pledged to create more inclusive departments while increasing community outreach. And both spoke about how being a lesbian and a woman will make them better leaders.” Q

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HRC compiles 85 actions Biden can take for LGBTQ rights The Human Rights Campaign published a “Blueprint for Positive Change 2020”, with 85 policy recommendations for president-elect Joe Biden’s administration — none of which require going to Congress.

The recommendations include reversing outgoing president Donald Trump’s transgender military ban, ending the ban on gay men donating blood, and applying across all federal agencies the Supreme Court’s Bostock v. Clayton County decision, which held that Title VII of the Civil Rights Act of 1964 protects employees against discrimination because of their sexual orientation or gender identity.

Using the Bostock decision would reinstate discrimination protections put in place by the Obama Administration that was removed by the Trump administration, including in the Departments of Education and Justice.

“The momentous election of pro-equality champions Joe Biden and Kamala Harris puts us on a path to move equality forward by advancing policies to improve the lives of millions of LGBTQ people,” Human Rights Campaign President Alphonso David said in a statement.

“Over the last four years, the Trump-Pence administration has systemically attacked LGBTQ people and our nation’s most sacred institutions — our courts, our Constitution, and our fundamental civil rights.”

“These are steps that the Biden-Harris administration can take affirmatively and administratively to protect LGBTQ people and really not only put us back in positions that we were in before the Trump administration but

advance us forward toward equality,” David told the Washington Blade.

He said the Biden-Harris transition team has already been provided a copy of the blueprint and their reaction has been “positive.”

“They have been very hospitable, very open to receiving the blueprints, and very accommodating in discussing any concerns or questions that may arise as we go through the process,” he said.

The document also calls for the Department of Housing and Urban Development to restore the Equal Access Rule, which HUD Secretary Ben Carson removed this past summer to allow federally-funded homeless shelters to refuse to help transgender people more easily. HUD even issued advice to homeless shelters on how to spot transgender women to refuse to help them.

The document also calls for the Federal Trade Commission to “implement industry-wide regulations prohibiting the false and misleading advertising, marketing, and other business practices of any individual or organization that provides conversion therapy.”

People who promise to change others’ sexual orientation or gender identity — even though the practice has been widely discredited by mental health and medical organizations — would face sanctions for accepting money in exchange for a fake service.

Other policy suggestions in the Blueprint include more diverse judicial and administration appointments, increased data collection on LGBTQ people in various areas of government operations, and a call for non-binary gender markers on U.S. passports. Q

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10 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NEWS

Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 318 | DECEMBER, 2020

Ways to commemorate World AIDS Day, December 1, 2020 World AIDS Day is held on December 1 each year and is an opportunity for people worldwide to unite in the fight against HIV, show their support for people living with HIV, and to commemorate people who have died. World AIDS Day was the first global health day, held for the first time in 1988.

Globally there are an estimated 34 million people who have the virus. Despite the virus only being identified in 1984, more than 35 million people have died of HIV or AIDS, making it one of the most destructive pandemics in history.

Today, scientific advances have been made in HIV treatment, there are laws to protect people living with HIV and we understand so much more about the condition. Despite this, people do not know the facts about how to protect themselves and others, and stigma and discrimination remain a reality for many people living with the condition.

World AIDS Day is important because it reminds the public and government that HIV has not gone away — there is still a vital need to raise money, increase awareness, fight prejudice, and improve education.

This year, all events are being held virtually because of the Coronavirus/ COVID-19 pandemic. The stories on some of these events:

The Quilt is now available to view online in its entirety. Together, the panels— sewn into groups of eight — serve as a massive, searchable memorial to the more than 125,000 people who have died of HIV and AIDS since 1980.

“When we created the first Quilt panels it was to share with as many people possible lives tragically being lost to AIDS and to demand action from our government,” says quilt founder and gay rights activist Cleve Jones in a statement.

“The Quilt has become a powerful educator and symbol for social justice. My hope is that through continued storytelling and making the panels available online, that more people will be drawn to its stories, its history, and that we can continue to change hearts and minds.”

Jones decided to commemorate the

collages and stenciled lists of names.

Katherine Ott, a Smithsonian’s National Museum of American History curator says the quilt “is the largest, most complicated example of folk art in the United States. Furthermore, it was a new kind of memorial; one that was collectively created and movable and shape-shifting, instead of the classic mausoleum sort of thing or sober mourning statue.”

Last November, the NAMES Project Foundation, which was established in 1987 to care for the quilt, announced plans to transfer an archive of more than 200,000 items associated with the project — including biographical records, photographs, news clippings, and letters—to the Library of Congress’ American Folklife Center. The Atlanta-based foundation also revealed plans to send the quilt home to San Francisco under the stewardship of the National AIDS Memorial.

The digital archive was launched in June to commemorate the International AIDS Conference, which was held

1,000 San Francisco residents who had succumbed to AIDS to date in 1985 by asking those attending a march to tape placards bearing lost loved ones’ names onto the San Francisco Federal Building.

To Jones, the wall of names resembled a quilt.

Most of the quilt’s blocks are rectangles measuring 6 feet by 3 feet, or roughly the size of a grave. Most were individually crafted by people whose friends and family members succumbed to AIDS, This personal touch is evident in the panels’ designs, which range from abstract geometric patterns to intricate multimedia

virtually this year due to the COVID-19 pandemic, and the 40th anniversary of the first reported HIV cases in the United States. When viewing the interactive quilt, users can either appreciate the enormous mosaic in its entirety or zoom in on specific panels, which often include individuals’ names and messages of love.

Additionally, virtual visitors can search the quilt for specific names, keywords, or block numbers.

A new initiative dubbed 2020/40 accompanies the interactive quilt. Dedicated to sharing stories from the 40-year fight against AIDS, the platform includes

Explore All 48,000 Panels of the AIDS Memorial Quilt Online When the AIDS Memorial Quilt was first displayed on the National Mall in 1987, it contained 1,920 panels commemorating people who had died of the disease.

Twenty-five years later, when the quilt returned to the Mall as part of the 2012 Smithsonian Folklife Festival, it had grown so much in size that its 48,000 panels couldn’t be displayed simultaneously.

Instead, organizers showcased smaller sets of 1,500 squares on each day of the two-week celebration.

If laid out today, it would cover 1.2 million square feet. If each 3-foot by 6-foot panel was laid end-to-end, it would reach from downtown Salt Lake City, along I-80 for 77 miles to Evanston, Wyoming.

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interviews with such individuals as Al and Jane Nakatani, who lost two of their sons to AIDS, and Rayson Roldan, who was diagnosed with HIV in December 2016.

“As a person living with AIDS, I never thought I would have to live through two pandemics,” says John Cunningham, executive director of the National AIDS Memorial, in the statement. “While very different, there is a thread that pulls through connecting them together, rooted in stigma and discrimination. The Quilt and storytelling efforts can help us learn from the past to positively change the future.”

The event is part of the new Live with Leadership conversation series launched earlier this year. Recordings for the sessions held during the U.S. Conference on HIV/AIDS, the National 2020 National Ryan White Conference on HIV Care and Treatment, and AIDS 2020 are available on HIV.gov.

Sign up to receive email updates from HIV.gov and follow @HIVgov for more about World AIDS Day 2020.

World AIDS Day ‘Live with Leadership’ online conversation On World AIDS Day, December 1, the Office of Infectious Disease and HIV/ AIDS Policy will host a special Live with Leadership — World AIDS Day Edition conversation to learn directly from key HHS and community leaders about new and ongoing work furthering the Ending the HIV Epidemic: A Plan for America initiative.

The session will take place on Tuesday, Dec. 1, noon to 1 p.m. MST and may be accessed at bit.ly/WorldAIDS2020.

Harold Phillips, the chief operating officer for the initiative will moderate the session. Speakers include leaders of the Ready, Set, PrEP program, and the ongoing effects of Covid-19 on the HIV community. You may submit questions before the event to EndHIVEpidemic@ hhs.gov or during the session through the Zoom chatbox.

No advance registration required, and all are welcome. There is no cost to participate.

edness of both pandemics — the lives lost, the survivors, the activism, the heroes. Through a distinguished list of guest speakers, panelists, video storytelling, and musical tributes, important insights will be shared to help answer the questions about how a nation responds, how it heals, and what lessons must be learned to prepare for the future.

The forum will be presented virtually and free to the public.

Headliners include Dr. Anthony Fauci, director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases, and Dr. David Ho, director of the Aaron Diamond AIDS Research Center at Columbia University.

TOPICS:

Dr. Anthony Fauci will keynote World AIDS Day — A National Conversation 2020 marks 40 years since the first cases of AIDS were reported in the United States — a pandemic that has led to nearly 700,000 lives lost and still no cure four decades later. This year, the United States struggles through another pandemic — the fight against COVID-19. The loss of life has surpassed 246,000 in a matter of months.

World AIDS Day 2020: A National Conversation will bring together powerful voices from both pandemics for an important conversation about health justice, social activism, remembrance, hope, and resilience on December 1, 11 a.m. to 1 p.m. MST. The event spotlights the interconnect-

Medical and Scientific Leadership: Anthony Fauci, M.D. and David Ho, M.D., leading health experts on the front lines of medical and scientific advancements during two global pandemics, will discuss the health, research, and long-term impacts of HIV/AIDS and COVID-19.

Activism that Sparks Change and Movements: A discussion with leaders whose actions have made a difference during both pandemics, demanding social and health justice.

Impact on Marginalized Communities: A conversation on how HIV/AIDS and COVID-19 have disproportionately affected communities of color and the systemic barriers that compound poor health outcomes.

A Look to the Future: Surviving voices from the AIDS pandemic come together to share their feelings about how a nation responds, heals, and remembers those lost to both pandemics. Q More information at aidsmemorial.org/wad2020

12 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | VIEWS

views

Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 318 | DECEMBER, 2020

quotes “The election of Joe Biden and Kamala Harris proves once again that equality is a winning issue... From Biden’s work championing hate crimes protections in the 1980’s to Harris performing some of the first marriages for LGBTQ couples after Prop 8 was overturned, these leaders have a clear vision that centers unity over division.”

— Alphonso David, President of the Human Rights Campaign

“The results of this presidential election affirm that every vote and every voter counts. LGBTQ people and all marginalized Americans came together to make this victory possible, and now the journey to safety, equality and acceptance can continue forward.”

— GLAAD president and CEO Sarah Kate Ellis

“A lot of people just don’t like to be told they can only think a certain way, and that’s exactly what the left does...

You’re accused of being a racist or a homophobe if you don’t agree with everything they say, and a lot of people are just tired of that.”

— Bob Kabel, Chairman, Log Cabin Republicans

“I am proud of the coalition we put together, the broadest and most diverse in history...

Democrats, Republicans and Independents. Progressives, moderates and conservatives.

Young and old. Urban, suburban and rural. Gay, straight, transgender.”

— Joe Biden, President-elect

DECEMBER, 2020 | ISSUE 318 | Qsaltlake.com

guest editorial

Fighting for our shot Victory

BY RICK GUASCO

came in the form of a tweet posted in the middle of the afternoon on Aug. 5: Pharmaceutical company Moderna was dropping its exclusion of people living with HIV allowing those whose immune system was stable while on antiretroviral treatment to take part in the drug maker’s Phase 3 study of a leading COVID-19 vaccine candidate.

The reversal was a huge win for a group of HIV advocates scattered across the country who had pulled together to urge the National Institutes of Health and the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases to convince Moderna to change its protocol.

The Cambridge, Massachusetts-based company had already started recruiting 30,000 U.S. volunteers for a Phase 3 clinical trial of mRNA-1273, one of the more promising COVID-19 vaccine candidates. Jeff Taylor, of the HIV+Aging Research Project who lives in Palm Springs, discovered that people with HIV were excluded from the study.

“I didn’t realize they were starting to recruit already, so I checked out the clinicaltrials.gov listing,” Taylor said. “I alerted my activist colleagues, who swung into action.

Lynda Dee led the charge in contacting officials at NIAID and at the company itself.

We rapidly put together a sign-on letter that we distributed widely.”

A quick sequence of events followed. Dee emailed Richard Jefferys, of the Treatment Action Group, a community-based research and policy think tank devoted to better medical research on HIV, HCV and tuberculosis. Together, Dee and Jefferys drafted a letter to Dr. Francis Collins, director of the NIH. To ensure diverse representation in the sign-on letter, they reached out to Daniel Campbell, of the AIDS Treatment Activists Coalition; Guillermo Chacón, president of the Latino Commission on AIDS; and NMAC’s Moises Agosto, among others.

Nelson Vergel helped with the Change. org petition, which drew more than 1,100 signatures.

“It was extremely important for people living with HIV to be included in the Phase 3 trial because we need safety and efficacy data on PLHIV,” said Lynda Dee, a long-

time advocate at AIDS Action Baltimore.

“Without this essential data, how would we know if the Moderna vaccine is safe and if it works in PLHIV?” The Infectious Diseases Society of America/HIV Medicine Association sent a letter of its own to NIH director Collins and to officials at Operation Warp Speed, the White House’s effort to speed up COVID-19 vaccine development.

Dee credits Carl Dieffenbach, director of NIAIDS’s Division of AIDS for working “diligently” to “persuade” Moderna. The federal government has committed up to $955 million for the drug maker to develop mRNA-1273. Moderna’s study makes use of the federal government’s existing network of DAIDS clinical trial sites across the country.

“Moderna got a small fortune from the government and is using DAIDS clinical trial networks to conduct their studies on the taxpayers’ dime,” Dee remarked.

An estimated 1.2 million people in the U.S. are living with HIV, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. While it is unclear whether HIV by itself makes a person more vulnerable to COVID-19, the majority of people with HIV are now over age 50 and many live with co-existing conditions (or comorbidities) such as diabetes or cardiovascular disease, which can put them at greater risk.

The study’s original exclusions disqualified anyone who is in an “Immunosuppressive or immunodeficient state, including HIV infection.” However, the study’s inclusion criteria include, “Healthy adults or adults with pre-existing medical conditions who are in stable condition.”

“From what’s known about people with HIV on stable treatment with CD4 counts in the normal range (which is quite wide), there’s no issue with mounting protective responses to routine immunizations,” Jefferys said. “So, there’s no obvious reason why people with HIV shouldn’t have the option to participate in a COVID-19 vaccine efficacy trial if they choose.”

Dee compared Moderna’s exclusion of PLHIV to Gilead’s study of tenofovir alafenamide (TAF, Descovy) for HIV prevention (PrEP), which did not include cisgender

VIEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 13

women. Men who have sex with men and transgender women took part in the study, leading to last year’s FDA approval of TAF for PrEP, but not for use in receptive vaginal sex. “No data in women, no FDA approval [for women],” Dee said.

Taylor raised another consideration. “If there’s no data about PLHIV, insurance companies and other payers might refuse to cover the cost of any vaccines approved, in an effort to save money until there’s data proving efficacy in this population.”

Communications among pharmaceutical companies, federal agencies and the HIV community need to be improved, the activists said. Their battle underscores the need for community involvement in designing and developing clinical trials.

“HIV activists have a 35-year history of responding to inequities and bad science in research, and have a lot to offer researchers and biotech to ensure they do research right,” said Taylor.

Other companies developing COVID-19 vaccines such as Sanofi, NovaVax and Johnson & Johnson are all including PLHIV in their studies, according to Dee, as will another Phase 3 study of a vaccine from the University of Oxford and AstraZeneca. Soon after the Moderna announcement, Pfizer responded to a separate letter it had received from the activists.

“Pfizer has already been in the process of amending the protocol to clarify that people with stable HIV, HBV and HCV infections can enroll in the study,” said the letter, signed by the company’s senior vice president of vaccine clinical research and development. “This will require discussions with regulators, who will ultimately make the decision whether this clarification can be included.”

“I very much hope it encourages other COVID-19 vaccine developers to review exclusions for their large-scale efficacy trials — not just for HIV, but other infections such as hepatitis B [HBV] and C [HCV], and populations often studied as an afterthought, such as pregnant women and children,” said Jefferys.

To volunteer for a COVID-19 prevention study, go to coronaviruspreventionnetwork. org. For more information on ongoing and upcoming clinical trials for treatment and prevention of COVID-19, go to clinicaltrials.gov and enter COVID in the search term. Q Rick Guasco is the creative director of Positively Aware.

This column is a project of Plus, Positively Aware, POZ, The Body, Q Syndicate, and QSaltLake. Visit their websites for the latest updates on HIV/AIDS.

14 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | VIEWS

who’s your daddy

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 318 | DECEMBER, 2020

Kindness, cheer, and goodwill to all

BY CHRISTOPHER KATIS

No matter

how you slice it, 2020 was a hell of a year. What we all need now, maybe more than ever, are healthy doses of kindness, cheer, and goodwill. What better way to spread those holiday staples than the perfect gift? Here are some great gift ideas for the LGBTQ+ parents and their kids in your life.

Clothing Kids want to proclaim their love for their family, and Gay Pride Apparel lets them do it in style. Why not pick up a cute I Love My 2 Moms (or 2 Dads) or a Love Makes a Family T-shirt? They come in toddler and youth sizes. They also have a nice selection of gifts for adults, as well.

If you’re more creative than the average gift-giver, check out Customized Girl.

You can design a closet-full of fun, gay parent-themed clothing for kids and adults alike. They also offer a host of other options like totes, masks, and mugs, as well.

Services Want to give new parents — especially new dads — something different? Why

not offer them 24/7 access to a pediatric nurse? Maryanne Tranter, Ph.D., APN offers packages to help prepare new parents on a variety of topics, as well as answer questions. Check it out at Healthy Child Concierge.

Maybe you can’t wait to be the favorite aunt or g’uncle. Gays with Kids has just launched a Partners to Fatherhood Program, which offers a wide variety of information about the various paths to parenthood for gay men.

Books You can’t go wrong with books! There are several fun titles for kids with LGBTQ+ parents and the moms and dads on your list.

FOR THE KIDS: Greg Howard has two great coming-ofage books for tweens. The Whispers about a young gay teenage boy trying to find his mom, and Middle School’s a Drag, You Better Werk about a school talent show, an enterprising kid, and a budding drag queen!

Solving a cyber mystery isn’t the only challenge that Zenobia July must deal with. She’s also coming out as a trans girl.

Know who WANTS your business and will treat you with the DIGNITY and RESPECT you deserve

Two dogs are on an exciting quest to protect their dads in Alan Cumming’s (yes, the actor) The Adventures of Honey and Leon.

Ellie Royce delights readers with Auntie Uncle, a story about a drag queen who saves the day, as seen through the eyes of his/her nephew.

FOR THE PARENTS: For the more adventurous, try 52 Fridays: A Polyamorous, Queer, Kinky, Tantric Love Story, by KamalaDevi McClure, a tale about passion, sex, and love.

On the other end of the spectrum, Catechism of the Heart: A Jesuit Missioned to the Laity, by Benjamin Brenkert explores sexuality within this Catholic order.

Rainbow Relatives: Real-World Stories and Advice on How to Talk to Kids About LGBTQ+ Families and Friends, by Sudi Karatas aims to help parents raise open-minded and accepting kids.

Find these titles — and many more — at Salt Lake’s own The King’s English.

If it’s not on the shelf, they’re happy to order it.

Stocking Stuffers Looking for stocking stuffers? Try one of the fun graphic novels about Pete Buttigieg, Ruth Bader Ginsburg, or Kamala Harris available from Tidalwavecomics.com. Or Little Justice Leaders — a monthly box to help young learners better understand complex issues, including LGBTQ+ rights.

I strive only to include gifts specifically for LGBTQ+ families, but Laura Ann Cohn’s cute pink flamingo cards don’t have anything to do with gay parenting.

However, when she pitched me the idea, she was so kind, I just had to include them anyway — you can buy them on Etsy (LACBirds).

Here’s wishing everyone a holiday season filled with kindness, cheer and good will to all.

Happy Holidays! Q

DECEMBER, 2020 |

ISSUE 318 | Qsaltlake.com

creep of the month

VIEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 15

Tiffany Trump

BY DANNE WITKOWSKI

The Trump

Administration is the most anti-LGBTQ administration in history. So the fact that there was a Trump Pride event is insulting all on its own.

But Tiffany Trump’s rambling speech at the event added to the insult.

“It’s such an honor to be here and speak truthfully, honestly and from my heart,” Tiffany said to a small group of people.

There were more red hats than masks.

“I know what my father believes in.

Prior to politics, he supported gays, lesbians, LGBQIA+ community,” she says, throwing her hands up in an expression of exasperation. “Okay?” Was leaving out the “T” in that string of letters intentional?

She says that her best friends are gay and that notions that Trump doesn’t support this community are “fabricated lies.”

But they aren’t. The Trump Administration has been especially cruel to transgender people. As Keith Boykin pointed out on Twitter, Trump reversed Obama’s trans protections in schools, banned transgender service members, banned homeless trans people in shelters, tried to reverse Obama’s protections for trans people in health care and nominated anti-LGBTQIA+ judges. These are verifiable facts.

Not to mention that Trump’s latest Supreme Court Pick will put marriage equality in serious jeopardy once she’s confirmed.

Tiffany claims that Trump’s support of LGBQ people is pure.

“He’s never done it for politics and he’s not doing it for politics,” she said.

“My dad cannot be bought off. He’s not going to let anyone change his views,” she said to applause and without any apparent irony. “And I’m praying that you all see that.”

“My mom’s here in the audience,” Tiffany said, and Marla Maples stood up in

the front row and waved and blew kisses to the crowd.

Tiffany mentioned that her mom used to perform on Broadway, because there’s lots of gays on Broadway.

“Unfortunately, one of her best friends passed away from AIDS. And what I think is so powerful is when my father says that he is going to” — she caught herself before she said that her dad will cure AIDS — “that there will be a cure in the next 10 years, there will be, and God bless.”

She pressed her hands together in prayer and bows.

Never mind the fact that in June, 2020 Trump erroneously said that scientists have “come up with the AIDS vaccine,” because he’s a moron.

Is it possible that there will be a cure for AIDS in the next 10 years? Maybe.

But it won’t be because of Trump, a man so deeply distrustful of science that he’s let over 210,000 people die of COVID-19 on his watch. His COVID-19 response plan consists of holding mass gatherings of unmasked people and calling the media “dumb bastards” for their continued coverage of this pandemic that is only going to get worse as the weather gets colder and people move indoors for most activities.

Tiffany bragged that her dad was the first president to appoint an openly gay person to a cabinet level position, referring to his appointment of Fox News commentator Richard Grenell to acting director of national intelligence.

Keeping in line with Trump’s personnel picks, Grenell had no national security experience before assuming that position. Grenell was appointed because he’s a Trump loyalist, not because Trump is loyal to gays.

She laments the fact that there are “so many people against us,” and by “us” she means the Trump family. She is not talking about the many persons against

LGBTQ people who have been emboldened by this administration.

“Unfortunately that happens when you go against the establishment, you go against big pharma, you go agains the tech monopolies, you go agains the deep state,” she continues. “They don’t like it, right? They don’t like change.”

Donald Trump has done none of these things. For one thing, he IS the establishment in that he’s a rich guy looking out for other rich guys. This idea that he’s taken on big pharma is also a joke.

Instead of fighting for health care for more Americans he is suing to undo the Affordable Care Act which would result in millions of Americans losing insurance during a pandemic. He did try to ban TikTok, so that’s something? Oh, and the deep state is a right-wing conspiracy theory that Obama has secret folks imbedded in the federal government to bring down Trump. If only.

“The Democrats have pretty much attempted to always control who you, we are supposed to vote for one way or the other,” she says, using air quotes around “you” and “we.”

“I wouldn’t lie to you I promise,” she says before adding that she didn’t bother to prepare any remarks for the event, which sums up her family’s credibility and work ethic perfectly. Q D’Anne Witkowski is a poet, writer and comedian living in Michigan with her wife and son. She has been writing about LGBT politics for over a decade. Follow her on Twitter @MamaDWitkowski.

16 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | HOLIDAY GIFT GUIDE — LOCAL

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 318 | DECEMBER, 2020

Holiday Gift Guide — Buy Local This year

it is almost hypercritical that we support local artists and shops who have struggled to remain open through the pandemic. As we all know, buying local helps the community in so many ways.

Buying from a local artisan puts food on their table.

Here are some ideas of places to consider for your holiday gift-giving.

Agile Art Glass Art glass created by Salt Lake artisan Kevin Scott features a lot of LGBT-oriented designs. Here, we show their festive cheese platter with four cheese knives and servers.

Rainbow without being SOO rainbow. But if you want SOOO rainbow, try the Rainbow Glass Garden Art. 801-328-3627 agileartglass.com life. Simpson & Vail tea collection pairs perfectly with some of your favorite literary classics. Use code TEAPARTY at checkout for 15% off your order, valid on teas and corresponding literary classic.

3302 S. 900 East, Salt Lake City. Mon.–Sat., 11 a.m.–6 p.m. 801-262-2873. marissasbooks.com

Utah Museum of Fine Arts Museum Store For a variety of fun and unique gift items, try the Museum Store at Utah Museum of Fine Arts on the University of Utah campus. They offer personalized gifts and local artist products, including jewelry, pottery, textiles, books, and more.

The Museum Store is open Wednesday–Friday, noon to 5 p.m., through Friday, Dec. 18, but closed Thanksgiving Day and Friday, Nov. 27. Seniors and high-risk individuals are welcome to arrive at 11 a.m. Face masks are required, and the store’s capacity is limited for customer and staff safety.

410 Campus Center Dr., Salt Lake City.

801-585-6961. umfa.utah.edu/museum-store

Marissa’s Books and Gifts Marissa’s Books is an independent, family-owned bookstore in Salt Lake City, offering 50% off books of all genres online.

They are now providing curbside pickup, eGift Cards, shopping appointments, and over 10,000 items.

The perfect gift for the tea lover in your

LUX Catering and Events

Urban Arts Gallery Urban Arts: A broad spectrum of art inspired by city life and culture that showcases everything from raw street art to fine modern art.

Our spotlight: Artist Kaycee Lane creates these intricate, wild, decidedly untraditional trees out of everything from doll hands to seashells.

116 S. Rio Grande, Salt Lake City at The Gateway. Tues.-Sun., 12–9 p.m. 801-2300820. urbanartsgallery.org

The lack of events has hit caterers and event planners extra hard. LUX has been a huge supporter of the Utah Pride Center and many other LGBTQ charities for many, many years. They are now offering gift boxes for pickup at their location across the street from the Wine Store on 300 West. They range from $25 to $50 and are elegantly packaged, as you would expect from the perfectionists at LUX. Get them at luxcateringandevents.com/shop They are also offering catered Thanksgiving and Christmas dinner packages. Want to be a secret Santa? Order one for a family in need. Get those at luxcateringandevents. com/online-ordering/

The King’s English Bookshop Look on page 20 of this magazine to see our 4-page section of our book reviewer’s recommendations for books that would make great books, and get with King’s English to order them. Their website shows availability for most of the books listed.

DECEMBER, 2020 |

ISSUE 318 | Qsaltlake.com

rustic home décor in combination with metaphysical supplies.

You will find items you’d expect in a metaphysical store plus more: scented candles, candlesticks, curiosities, athames, Viking drinking horns, incense, herbs, and an assortment of bronze statues from the world-renown Veronese Collection.

If you want a hilarious book by a local gay-as-a-bunny redhead, only King’s English carries Scott Perry’s Confession of a Red-Headed Step Child. Hurry and get yours before he releases his second book.

Dallas Ian’s LGBTees & Queer Gear You’ve seen Dallas at every Pride and fun market there is with his irreverent tees. You may now order them online, along with gift packets for just $10. The “Trans is Beautiful” dog tag and T-bottle is our favorite.

Items can be shipped, delivered locally, or picked up at his downtown location. dallas-ians-lgbtees-queer-gear. square.site

The Conjuring Tree The gay-owned Conjuring Tree offers handcrafted items designed specifically from natural materials to bring love, light, and laughter into your home and enhance your own brand of magic.

The home-based store offers

Some best-sellers are the variety of Viking drinking horns, mugs, and tankards. Drinking horns have been used across many cultures for over 2,600 years. The buffalo horn was the drinking vessel of the Gods.

Thor, the Norse God of thunder, drank from a buffalo horn that contained all of the seas. In Native American culture, horns represent wealth and abundance and are said to offer the energy of survival and the ability to overcome any obstacle. theconjuringtree.com, 385-842-3750

Pioneer Theatre Company PTC is finding creative ways to keep theater professionals working while they sit out this unexpected intermission, and you can help. They are making masks, having their scene shop

HOLIDAY GIFT GUIDE — LOCAL | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 17

create gift items, and selling off props used in previous shows.

An example is this cute wine butler that fits on a bottle of wine or bubbly and holds two glasses created by PTC welders.

(Wine and glasses not included.) bit.ly/ptcshoppe

Salt Lake City’s Downtown Alliance The Downtown Alliance is incentivizing people to shop downtown by offering Downtown Dollars. You can shop, eat, and gift locally at dozens of downtown bars, restaurants, and retailers. This electronic gift card may be used at many of your favorite downtown merchants and is a great gift for your besties (including you). Simply show your eGift Card on your mobile device at participating retailers to use.

For a limited time, purchase $75 or more in Downtown Dollars and receive $25 in Bonus Bucks, or purchase $50 in Downtown Dollars and receive $10 in Bonus Bucks. downtownslc.org/dollars

Salt Lake City Performing Arts The Arts took a tremendous hit this year. To ensure they can get back on track, consider gifting season tickets or gift cards.

PLAN-B THEATRE COMPANY is offering a 25% discount on their 2021 Subscription Series, featuring P.G. Anon by Julie Jensen, Art & Class by Matthew Ivan Bennett, and a short play series titled Local Color. planbtheatre.org PIONEER THEATRE COMPANY is offering “Ticket to Feel” gift cards, good for any future show, at tickets.pioneertheatre.org (choose “Gift Cards”) BALLET WEST’s season tickets are available at balletwest.org starting at $63 and as high as $498 with four options of which productions you want to see.

UTAH SYMPHONY AND UTAH OPERA have gift certificates available at my.usuo.org/ gift/add OGDEN’S GOOD COMPANY THEATRE has gift certificates available at goodcotheatre.com

Utah AIDS Foundation The Utah AIDS Foundation is holding a Virtual Red Ribbon Tree Adoption. The group set up a wish list through Amazon.com.

Order any of the items on the list and have them directly sent to the Utah AIDS Foundation or you and take them in by Dec. 15.

The list is available at utahaids. org/support-us/season-s-givings Q

18 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | HOLIDAY GIFT GUIDE: ONLINE

Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 318 | DECEMBER, 2020

The ultimate guide to online gay gift giving 2020 table in style with Molly Hatch’s modern heirloom ceramic plates and mugs featuring matching icon prints of candy canes, Christmas trees, gingerbread folx, holly, ice skates, and snowflakes. $16-$18 each; mollyhatch.com

BY MIKEY ROX

In a year

filled with more craziness than any of us ever expected, at least we have the holidays. What will they look like this year? Bright, beautiful and back to basics.

Treat yourself and your loved ones to these come-on-be-happy presents handpicked for LGBTQ+ friends and family.

We Are Beautiful Ring There wasn’t much glitter or glam in The Year That Wasn’t, but you can change that. One-hundred percent of proceeds from Pharoun’s 22k gold, rainbow-edged We Are Beautiful cocktail ring (also available in sterling silver) will benefit civil-rights organization Southerners on New Ground. $115-$145; pharaoun.com

Therapeutic Journal Stressed? Join the club — if clubs were a thing right now.

Until then, try the Write Here & Tear therapeutic journal, which encourages users to jot down their troubles then tear ’em up. Journaling and paper tearing have proven results, too, with 55 percent of survey respondents reporting relief, and another 35 percent relaxation. $20; shop.nicolerussell.com

Queer Agenda Card Game Made by and for the LGBTQ+ community, the Queer Agenda card game prompts players to participate in rowdy dares and answer inappropriate questions — because you’re goddamn right it should. $25; fitzgames.com

Embossed Rolling Pin Imprint whimsical holiday scenes — including detailed snowflakes, trees and reindeer — onto sugar cookies, piecrusts, and even pastas from solid beech wood rolling pins that’ll give Martha a run for her baking-maven money. $35; embossedco.com

Rainbow Safety Razor Iridescent anodized zinc and brass alloy add a splash of queer panache to your Dopp kit on a safety razor — cant be too careful in Final Destination 2020 — that changes appearance depending how light hits it.

Just like you, boo. $30; shave.net

Heated Towel Rack Spas and bathhouses were but a memory this year, but you can bask in hot hugs from the comfort of your own home.

This heated towel rack keeps your fluffy terrys dry and 90 percent more hygienic between washes — an appreciated feature during a COVID-19 Christmas. $500+; bathroombutleronline.com

Holiday Icon Dessert Set Set your socially distanced dessert

Sustainable Swabs and Tissues LastSwab and LastTissue replace single-use Q-Tips and Kleenex for convenient, washable, good-for-you-and-the-environment stocking stuffers. Because there is no Planet B. $12-$24; lastobject.com

Gummy Sweet Treat Tower Taste the rainbow of a foot-high sweets tower from Dylan’s Candy Bar — including bears (gummy ones, of course), Razzmataz rainbow bites, red Australian licorice, and sour poppers (not the kind you’re used to) — packaged in striped, tiered boxes and tied with a bow. $50; dylanscandybar.com

#FakeFacts Game No, this card game isn’t based on Donald Trump’s presidency — not entirely, at least — but it will provide hours of fun trying to identify and fools others with bizarre, surprising, and unpredictable trivia. Easy to play virtually over Zoom, too. $15; thegamecrafter.com

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DECEMBER, 2020 | ISSUE 318 | Qsaltlake.com

provide cheeky edge to a New Year’s Eve look that’s not lookin’ back. 2021 or bust, baby! $260; styletypology.com

Spongebob Pride Pop! Pride celebrations were largely cancelled this year — because what wasn’t — but you can shine on anytime of year, queer, with a Funko Pop! Pride stocking stuffer in the form of verified gay-con Spongebob Squarepants. $11; funko.com

Robot Vacuum Yeedi’s K650 automated vacuum — boasting bigger suction, less noise, high-efficiency filtration, and made of durable anti-scratch tempered glass — lessens the Cinderell-y workload while you work from home. $220; amazon.com Mikey Rox is an award-winning journalist and LGBT lifestyle expert whose work has been published in more than 100 outlets across the world. He currently lives in his van, ho-ho-hoing around the country.

Connect with Mikey on Instagram @ mikeyroxtravels

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20 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | HOLIDAY GIFT GUIDE: BOOKS

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 318 | DECEMBER, 2020

Nonfiction

QSaltLake’s 2020 book holiday gift guide

BY TERRI SCHLICHENMEYER

The holidays

this year are going to be, well, unique.

Some family members won’t be there. Others are coming, regardless of whatever’s going on in the country. Still, others are sending their regards and a box of presents, which is something you might do, too. And here’s the good news: books are an easy wrap, easy to box, and easily shipped. So try one of these great books for that person who can’t make it to your table this holiday season?

LGBTQ For the person who craves a thriller, THESE VIOLENT DELIGHTS, by Micah Nemerever, is the gift to give. It’s a novel of two young men who meet at college and soon become obsessed with one another in different ways. But one is cruel, the other fearful, and you know that ain’t good.

The person on your gift list who loves drag will enjoy THE COCKETTES: ACID DRAG & SEXUAL ANARCHY from the archives of Fayette Hauser. It’s a lavishly-illustrated 50-year anniversary look at drag and the counterculture.

If your giftee is a die-hard, conference-attending, never-miss-an-appearance fan, then slip CONVENTIONALLY YOURS, by Annabeth Albert under the tree. It’s the story of a road trip, two fierce hate-fests, one romance, and two fanboys, but who’s the biggest? Pair it with DATE ME, Bryson Keller, by Kevin van Whye for double the love.

Here’s something unique: THEY SAY SARAH, by Pauline Delabroy-Allard is a best-seller in France and a skinny book that your giftee won’t be able to stop reading. It’s the story of a single mother who’s living in Paris with her child. The woman has a boyfriend but one New Years’ Eve, she meets a woman who changes everything.

Pair it with something nonfiction, like I’ve Been Wrong Before, by Evan James, a book of essays on life, coming out, relationships, and more.

The Fans of biographies will want to unwrap MAMA’S BOY, by Dustin Lance Black.

Black, a screenwriter, and activist tells the story of his childhood, having been raised by a single mother who suffered a lifetime of almost-insurmountable issues, and how they came to terms with everything they’d endured together. Pair it with DADDY, by Michael Montlack, a book of essays on this and that and the other.

Another great memoir, LATER: MY LIFE AT THE EDGE OF THE WORLD, by Paul Lisicky, is the story of finding a place to settle down, and watching an epidemic as it changes that newly-beloved place.

The star watcher on your list will love Inside the HOLLYWOOD CLOSET: A BOOK OF QUOTES,

by Boze Hadleigh. It’s a who’s-who and a whatwas-what that looks back at who said what about life as a gay star, and it’s fun!

The reader who wants something unique will enjoy THE LAST ALIAS: TRUE STORIES AND A TALE THAT MIGHT BE, by Ste7en Foster (and no, that’s not a typo). As humans, we are many different things. This book will make you think: who are YOU?

Give your historian something a bit different this year with KENT STATE: FOUR DEAD IN OHIO, by Derf Backderf. Written entirely in graphic-novel style, it’s a look at the event that changed America more than 50 years ago. Pair it with THE HARDHAT RIOT, by David Paul Kuhn, a book about a little-remembered event that happened four days after the Kent State shootings.

What do you get for the person who loves reading about boats and submarines? A recommendation is UNDER PRESSURE: LIVING LIFE AND AVOIDING DEATH ON A NUCLEAR SUBMARINE, by Richard Humphreys.

When the author was eighteen, he joined the Royal Navy and served underwater. What more can an adventure-lover want to read about?

Can’t go wrong when you pair it with WHATEVER IT TOOK, by Henry Langrehr and Jim DeFelice. It’s a story of an American paratrooper at the end of World War II. For the person who would love something a little unique this holiday, look for THE NEW WITCH,

by Marie D. Jones.

It’s a book about Wicca, spells and potions, magic, and all things that today’s spiritual practitioner needs to know.

Wrap it up with EARTH MAGIC, by Marie D. Jones, a guide for the sorceress in you.

Is there someone on your list who craves a good scare? Then look for DEMONIC FOES,

by Richard Gallagher. He’s a psychiatrist who specializes in the paranormal, particularly in demonic possession. You will feel the shivers.

For the parent of older kids, ribbon-tie WHAT GIRLS NEED, by Marisa Porges, Ph.D. The book is about raising strong, resilient future women; pair it with AND THEN THEY STOPPED TALKING TO ME, by Judith Warner; a book about surviving middle school amongst mean kids.

It’s been an unusual year. So show your book lover that it’s possible to buck up and survive with WHY FISH DON’T EXIST, by Lulu Miller.

It’s the story of an early 20th-century scientist and the day he watched his life’s work shatters.

What he did was astounding, and a great lesson for 2020. And possibly include MONSTERS OF THE DEEP, by Nick Redfern. This book is more cryptozoology than a biography, but for fishing fans, that’s fine.

Here’s a fun read: SEALAND, by Dylan Taylor-Lehman, the story of a micronation named Sealand, off the British coast, and on which the Royal Family rules it. With a little of everything in this book — history, pirates, battles, kings, and an attempted coup — your historian and

DECEMBER, 2020 |

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the travel fan will love it. Pair it up with WE HAVE BEEN HARMONIZED: LIFE IN CHINA’S SURVEILLANCE STATE, by Kai Strittmatter. A book that’s a little more serious, and adds a nice balance.

The reader who loves quick essays will enjoy THIS IS MAJOR, by Shayla Lawson. It’s a funny and serious look at racism from a Black woman who shares her thoughts on work, celebrity, names, “Black Girl Magic” and more. Pair it with WHY DIDN’T WE RIOT?, by Issac J. Bailey, about being Black in America today.

Here’s an idea from dad to son or vice versa: A BETTER MAN, by Michael Ian Black. It takes a look at masculinity and what it means to “be a man” in the 21st century. Give it to your son or son-to-be, who’ll get there someday. Or proudly gift it to Dad, to thank him for the guidance, and pair it with THE TOUGHEST KID WE KNEW,

by Frank Bergon, a story of the “New West,” California, and life in small towns and ranches.

Armchair scientists will be happy to flip through the pages of THE HANDY PHYSICS ANSWER BOOK, Third Edition by Charles Liu, Ph.D. This Q-and-A format is easy to read

HOLIDAY GIFT GUIDE: BOOKS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 21

and browse, and fun to use. Don’t be shy and include the science book: THE HUMAN COSMOS: CIVILIZATION AND THE STARS, by Jo Marchant, a book about how looking at the night sky makes us human.

For those who are a conservationist or activist, MILL TOWN, by Kerri Arsenault is perfect under the tree. It’s a story of a town in Maine, where the local industry may or may not be hurting the locals and life near the mill.

Consider adding these titles to your gift-giving: BARNSTORMING OHIO: TO UNDERSTAND AMERICA, by David Giffels, and PERILOUS BOUNTY: THE LOOMING COLLAPSE OF AMERICAN FARMING AND HOW WE CAN PREVENT IT, by Tom Philpott for an understanding of our country now. Since this subject runs deep, you also might look for DEATH IN MUD LICK, by Eric Eyre: shedding light on the opioid epidemic in coal country.

Do you have a person on your list who has a serious case of wanderlust? Then wrap up SPIRITS OF SAN FRANCISCO: VOYAGES THROUGH THE UNKNOWN CITY, by Gary Kamiya, drawings by Paul Madonna. It’s an easy-to-browse book of ideas for when you’re looking for somewhere different to visit. Pair it with THE CHANGE: MY GREAT AMERICAN, POSTINDUSTRIAL, MIDLIFE CRISIS TOUR,

by Lori Soderlind, the story of one woman, one elderly dog, and a road trip to remember.

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22 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | HOLIDAY GIFT GUIDE: BOOKS

The DIY woman on your gift list (and the one who craves self-sufficiency) will love having GIRLS GARAGE,

by Emily Pilloton.

It’s a super-helpful book about using tools, fixing things, understanding doit-herself language, tackling projects, and getting it done. Bonus: it’s great for women ages 16 to 96. Add it with A LAB OF ONE’S OWN, by Rita Colwell, Ph.D., and Sharon Bertsch McGrayne. This book is about women in science and how inequality and sexism have hurt the industry, and what women can do about it today.

If there’s a traveler — physically or of the armchair sort — THE WOMEN I THINK ABOUT AT NIGHT: TRAVELING THE PATHS OF MY HEROES, by Mia Kankimaki is what you’ll want to give this year. It’s a story of 10 historical female pioneers, and the author’s journey from continent to continent to get to know them. Pair it with OLIVE THE LIONHEART, by Brad Ricca. It’s the story of Olive MacLeod, who went to Africa by herself more than a century ago, in search of her fiance, who’d gone missing.

Is there a scientist in your family who also loves to be in the kitchen? You’re in luck with SCIENCE AND COOKING, by Michael Brenner, Pia Sorensen, and David Weitz. It includes recipes. How can you go wrong? Consider adding THE RISE: BLACK COOKS AND THE SOUL OF AMERICAN FOOD, by Marcus Samuelsson with Osayi Endolyn, Yewande Komolafe and Tamie Cook, photos by Angie Mosier. It’s a look at Black cooks, heritage, and soul food. Be sure to volunteer as the taste-tester.

For the giftee who is addicted to TV, SUNNY DAYS, by David Kamp is perfect. It’s a look back at children’s TV in the 1970s, but not of the cartoon genre; think Sesame Street and Mr. Rogers. Nostalgia + TV = a great gift.

If there’s someone on your list who loves gardening will love to see THE LANGUAGE OF BUTTERFLIES, by Wendy Williams under the tree. It’s the story of butterflies, why we love them, what scientists are learning about them, and how the world would be the lesser without them. Pair it with NATURALIST, by Edward O. Wilson, adapted by Jim Ottaviani and C.M. Butzer. It’s a graphic-novel-type biography about Wilson, who is a science-expert on ants and bugs.

The giftee who looks toward the future, always, will love to unwrap A WOMAN’S INFLUENCE, by Sheri Gaskins and Tony A. Gaskins, Jr. It’s a book for women who want to take better control at work, at home, and in their relationships. Pair it with READY FOR ANYTHING, by Kathi Lipp, a book about resilience amid crises of any size.

Is your political animal a little sorry to see the election over? Watch the animal glow with FIGHT HOUSE, by Tevi Troy, a book about the back-stabbing, fang-baring tumultuousness and rivalries inside the White House in the last century or so. Pair it with another great history book: UNION: THE STRUGGLE TO FORGE THE STORY OF UNITED STATES NATIONHOOD, by Colin Woodard.

For the writer on your gift list, you want to choose right… so choose MASTERING THE PROCESS: FROM IDEA TO NOVEL, by Elizabeth George. You may know George as a novelist — and if you do, you know the advice in this book is solid.

Wanna see your scientist smile? Give the gift of THE NEXT GREAT MIGRATION, by Sonia Shah. It’s a sweeping, vast look at us: where we’ve been, where we went, when we left, and how we got to where we are.

For your armchair biologist, this is a no-brainer.

Pair it with THE SUM OF THE PEOPLE, by Andrew Whitby, a book about why countries take a census and how it’s shaped the world.

And if you’ve got a science-minded someone you’re looking to gift, look for Exploring the ELEMENTS: A COMPLETE GUIDE TO THE PERIODIC TABLE, by Isabel Thomas, and pictures by Sara Gillingham. It’s seriously lighthearted and makes this branch of science easy and fun to understand. Add to it CAN PEOPLE JUST BURST INTO FLAMES?, by Larry Scheckel, a great book of science trivia, questions, and answers for any scientist (or anyone curious), age 12 and up.

Fiction Does anybody need another book about a natural disaster? Ha, of course, they do! So that’s why you should look for THE 2084 REPORT: AN ORAL HISTORY OF THE GREAT WARMING, by James Lawrence Powell. Yes, it’s set in the future. You can hope so, anyhow.

If your giftee loves a good, multilayered novel about family and best-forgotten mem-

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ISSUE 318 | DECEMBER, 2020

ories, then look for HIEROGLYPHICS, by Jill McCorkle. When Lil and Frank move back to Frank’s childhood hometown, their past moves with them. Wrap it up with True Story, by Kate Reed Petty, a story of childhood trauma, and the chance for those who lived to recover from it.

For the giftee who’s ready to pack up and move across the country, THE EXILES, by Christina Baker Kline might be a good choice for a gift. It’s a novel about three women who are exiled to Australia more than a century ago when exile was punishable. Fans of Orphan Train, listen up. Wrap it up with this: FLYAWAY, by Kathleen Jennings, a dark twisted tale of vanishings and family horror in Australia.

Surely, someone on your gift list has wished this year to be cloned. WRAP THE MIRROR MAN, by Jane Gilmartin with a “careful what you wish for” note. And include The Operator,

by Gretchen Berg, the story of a woman who wishes she’d never overheard what she did.

For your loved ones to be surprised, add under the tree THE BOOK OF HIDDEN WONDERS, by Polly Crosby. It’s a book about a girl whose father entertained her with a story in which she’s a character, and it becomes a big bestseller. Good for her, right? Or not so much.

Perhaps include THE FALLING WOMAN, by Richard Farrell,a story about a woman who supposedly died in a plane crash — only she didn’t, but she wants to stay “dead.”

The person on your list who loves a good family drama will want THE LOST ORPHAN by Stacey Halls under the tree this year. It’s the story of two women and one little girl, and a secret that won’t be able to be kept for long.

Pair it with THE END OF THE DAY by Bill Clegg, a novel of friendship, relationships, and the resolution of long-buried secrets.

No doubt, there’s a historical fiction fan on your list, so there’s no doubt that you’ll want to wrap up BONNIE: A NOVEL by Christina Schwarz. Yep, it’s a fictionalized tale of Bonnie Parker, and how she became one of the early 20th-century’s most iconic outlaws. Wrap it up with THE BIG FINISH by Brooke Fossey, a novel about two outlaws that you’d never put together and their great escape.

If you’ve got a big reader on your list, it’s hard to find something they haven’t already seen.

That’s why you should wrap up LAYOVERLAND, by Gabby Noone. It’s the tale of a wom-

DECEMBER, 2020 |

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ISSUE 318 | Qsaltlake.com

an who lives a life she’s not proud of, so when she dies, she goes to purgatory.

There’s a chance for her to go to heaven, but it involves helping the guy who killed her.

Pair it with THE MIDNIGHT LIBRARY, by Matt Haig, the story of a possible place that offers a redo of life. It’s a spot between living and dying, but it’s not what your giftee thinks.

The short-story lover will enjoy CAT PERSON AND OTHER STORIES, by Kristen Roupenian,that’s a collection of creepy, odd tales that doubles as a gift of shivers. You can’t go wrong if you pair it with THE FACELESS OLD WOMAN WHO SECRETLY LIVES IN YOUR HOME, by Joseph Fink and Jeffrey Cranor. The title should tell you everything you need to know?

Is there someone on your list who loves a good sink-your-teeth-into novel? Then surprise a loved one with WHEN THESE MOUNTAINS BURN,by David Joy. It’s a tale of two men wrapped up in the drug trade — one, a father with a son who’s an addict; the other, an addict himself. And the DEA is asking for help… You can’t go

wrong if you sneak it under the tree with NINE SHINY OBJECTS

by Brian Castleberry — a novel of (supposed) UFOs and the legacy the sightings left behind.

For the novel-lover who professes to hate their job, you can’t go wrong with HENCH, by Natalie Zina Walschots.It’s a super-witty story of a woman with an unusual job (hey, somebody’s has to do it!) and what she does to remain gainfully employed after the next-to-worst thing happens. If you’re charmed by it, you should it with LIES LIES LIES,

by Adele Parks, which is a story of a family and the party that changes absolutely everything.

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Lovers of family-drama novels will whoop when they open LOUISIANA LUCKY,by Julie Pennell. It’s the tale of three sisters and a big lottery payout that makes all their dreams come true. Or not. Pair it with BETTY, by Tiffany McDaniel.

It’s a lovely novel of family and what happens when you learn things about them you don’t want to know.

And for the science-fiction-fantasy reader, you couldn’t find a better gift than TO SLEEP IN A SEA OF STARS, by Christopher Paolini.It’s a story of new worlds and a journey to make sure that the universe survives. It’s thrilling and edgy.

Note: It’s over 800 pages, so add a bookmark to this great gift. Q Many more books are listed on our website at qsaltlake.com, including books for young readers and mystery, thriller and true crime books.

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24 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | Q&A

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ISSUE 318 | DECEMBER, 2020

For Shamir, Success During a Pandemic Is True to Form

BY CHRIS AZZOPARDI

If you want

to know how musical chameleon Shamir is right now, expect the 25-year-old to answer much like he approaches making music. In both cases, he doesn’t like to repeat himself. “I’ve done a lot of interviews, so I’ve been trying to vary my answers,” he says, laughing.

On the day we connect by phone, he’s not good, he’s not bad. “I’m alive, you know.”

Considering his 2020, which has been one of his most successful years yet, that’s a very good thing to be. In March, just as the United States shut down due to the coronavirus pandemic, the Las Vegas-born, Philly-based musician, known for his exploratory DIY style, released Cataclysm. It wouldn’t be his only album of the year.

Six months later comes Shamir, his first self-titled album and, it’s obviously worth noting, his seventh altogether, all released within the five years since his 2015 breakout Ratchet dropped on the same label as Adele and garnered him prestige in the pop music world. Shamir, who identifies as non-binary and is open to being addressed by PHOTO COURTESY OF SHAMIR

any gender pronouns, went on to release two albums in 2017, Hope and Revelations.

Then came 2018’s Resolution and 2019’s Be the Yee, Here Comes the Haw. Genre-wise, his outside-the-box work is whatever he wants it to be, from pop to punk to country-inflected indie rock.

With Shamir, his second album of 2020 on his own label, he modernizes the lo-fi, women-led alt-pop-rock sound of the ’90s. At this point, he finds a way to do what he wants, when he wants, with nothing stopping him. Not a label, not a producer. Not even a global pandemic.

Is it a weird juxtaposition to be successful amid chaos and crisis? Definitely. But knowing the way my life works, it makes total sense.

In other words, for you, this is just another year? Well, success in the middle of a pandemic? That’s who I am. Anytime anything great happens to me, there’s always a catch. If you think of my most successful era, Ratchet, yeah, that was my most successful release but it was in a genre I didn’t want to do, had no business doing, and didn’t even fucking understand. (Laughs.)

Considering the artist you’ve evolved into, I wondered how you looked back at that era. Can you talk about the artistic journey you’ve been on? It was just all natural. I completely removed myself from electronic-based pop music. I had to go back to being behind the guitar because before that record that’s what I was doing. It was weird to see me sing without my guitar, and I think I kind of did the pop era as a way to prove to myself that I could step back from behind the guitar, and I did and I did it successfully. But I realize that it didn’t make me happy. And I’m happiest behind the guitar. I enjoy songwriting more that way, and I realize that, well, this is my job now, and my life now.

(Laughs.) I have to do it how I want, in a way that make me the most comfortable With this being your first self-titled album, I wondered if the significance of that is that this is you at your purest. It’s exactly that. Not even necessarily me at my purest, but it’s how I always imagined myself.

It applies to every element that I love, because I do like to listen to electronic pop music and I am inspired by it, but I love playing guitar and I love grunge and

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I love indie rock but I also love country and I also love punk. I think this record encapsulates all of that but also makes it digestible for anyone who likes any genre of music, really.

You seem more proud of this work than any albums you’ve done in the past. Is the feeling that you have now about this title different from, say, the feeling you had during the Ratchet release? Yeah. I feel different after every release. I think I only make records when I’m in a fairly transformative time in my life, and with every record, I can pinpoint what I was doing in that section of my life, what I was feeling, and where I was mentally and physically. I think it just varies with each release. Obviously this release is so different. Even if I wanted to kind of treat it like every other release, I can’t just by virtue of releasing it in the middle of a pandemic (laughs). Everything I release is so different, and I’m in such a different mindset. I just got through this year relatively very sober – the most sober I’ve ever been. I mean, not necessarily on purpose but kind of. And also last month was a year since I last had a cigarette and quit smoking, so yeah, pandemic aside, I feel like a completely different person just from those two things.

It sounds like you are finding personal fulfillment by controlling what you can even if the world is falling down around you. Yeah. This is the first record where I was not having a cigarette break between each vocal take. (Laughs.)

That’s progress. My last engineer would joke because I’d do maybe a few vocal takes and then be like, “OK, I need to take a break and have a cigarette.” He’d call it my “vocal warm-ups.” I hear a difference in my voice. I’m sure other people can’t, but there’s a certain clarity that I’ve never heard.

When it comes to making music, how did you learn to do so much on your own? I kind of have this jack-of-all-trades personality trait, and I don’t care to find out how something is made unless I feel like I can do it myself.

Did you learn anything new while making this album? No, not necessarily. I’m such a jack of so many trades now at this point.

(Laughs.)

There’s nothing more to learn! There really is nothing more to learn, (laughs) and if anything, it just kind of makes things more efficient. We made this record in only two weeks.

You’ve really cultivated a space for yourself in the underground pop music world, and I’m not sure the best way to ask this question, but do you feel like your white gay contemporaries get more credit? People love to ask me that. I will say this: No one can deny that if I was white my career wouldn’t look different. A perfect example is how [British musician] Scott

No one can deny that if I was white my career wouldn’t look different.

Walker died not too long ago and I did not know about him until he died, and I felt such kinship because his career trajectory was very similar to mine in the sense that he started off as a teen pop singer who kind of had a hit but then that wasn’t his vibe so he started to do more avant-garde stuff. No time throughout my career did anyone compare me to Scott Walker, but yet a lot of people who knew Scott Walker compared me to Prince. Why were you comparing me to Prince? (Sarcastically.) I wonder why! You really have to think about that. I would be looked at completely differently if I was a white artist just in general, straight or gay or anything. Also, Black people are just expected to be exceptional because to make it anywhere as a Black person you

have to be exceptional. It’s kind of just expected of us. That’s why sometimes …

I’m gonna say this on the record, but if you take this quote out of context, I’m gonna fight you. (Laughs.)

There will be no fight, I promise you. I don’t need the Beyhive comin’ for me.

But I love Beyoncé. Beyoncé is honestly one of the greatest performers of all time.

It is not her fault that she is one of the greatest performers of all time. I’m not trying to chastise her for being as great as she is. But a lot of people think all Black people need to be on the level of Beyoncé or they’re not shit. And that’s not her fault; that’s structural racism. So we gotta be on the level of Beyoncé to be seen as exceptional. Beyoncé is just un-human-level exceptional. For anyone.

But because she’s a Black woman and because she’s Black, if Black people aren’t touching that, then it’s just like, “Why should we care?”

It seems Beyoncé has become the go-to name for Black artists in the sense that white people I think go, “Is it really a race problem? Because look at Beyoncé. She’s made it.” And in a way, it’s kind of ridiculous that she’s had to get to this level to get to the level of success that she’s had when someone like … I love Britney Spears.

Britney Spears is great, right? But Britney Spears did not work as hard as Beyoncé.

But they’re seen on the same level. Yes, Britney worked a lot and everything, but the way that Beyoncé … Beyoncé never lip synced! The mic is always on!

What other challenges have you faced in the music industry because of who you are as a non-binary Black artist? Producers undermining my taste or what I want, just in general. Not listening to me. That’s obviously really hard.

Is that one of the reasons why you sought autonomy? That’s definitely one reason.

Because I really don’t like confrontation.

I’m the type of person who, a lot of times, would rather put my white flag up than really fight for something that feels frivolous in the grand scheme of things. One of the main reasons why I didn’t work

26 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | Q&A

with any producers [on past albums] is because every producer that would be willing to work with me already because of Ratchet had a preconceived notion of the type of artist I was and really couldn’t see past that. So I had to go and create this whole new world for myself to show the world and the industry what I’m becoming and kind of give them the picture of what I am doing. So I had to self-produce those records myself, and I was hoping that out of that a producer will hear that and eventually come to me.

That’s what happened with Kyle [Pulley] who produced five tracks, and I recorded most of it at his studio. He liked my artistry and what I was doing as opposed to being, “This person has a cool, unique voice. I want to basically use it to further my ideas.”

It’s a shame it took so long to find a producer to honor your vision. Yeah, it is a shame. But, honestly, that’s my life.

It’s sad. But I can be sad about it or I can just pick myself up by the bootstraps and just do everything. Again, the jack-of-alltrades thing, it also comes from it being kind of a necessity at this point. I would get nothing done if I waited on people to help.

There were so many times in the recording process where I would override a decision and Kyle would just be like, “OK.” There was not a back and forth. I did not have to fight someone. I used to get in spats with the producer of Ratchet, honestly, to the point where at the end of the day of recording, I just gave up. I just didn’t care. I was like, “This is not my record anymore.”

What was the motivation behind the aesthetics for this project? This was the first time where I kind of really felt like everything artistically did come with intent. I knew I wanted to have purple hair for this run (laughs). That came to me just in a vision. And I have spent all of last fall perfecting the very digital vintage look with the covers and the videos and the “On My Own” video. That video is very straightforward. It’s simple but it PHOTO COURTESY OF SHAMIR

Qsaltlake.com |

relies a lot on aesthetics, which I really loved. That was really fun for me, just styling and makeup wise. “I Wonder” was inspired by Keith Haring. So I think this of all eras was the most thought out artistic-wise.

How did you land on the blue nightgown for the “On My Own” video? I got that last summer in Seattle at a thrift sale at a popup shop. I just literally had it lying around, and I’m glad I got to immortalize it.

You’ve released seven albums in five years.

How do you do it? I write like a crazy person.

Do you write like a crazy person for any particular reason? Because I am a crazy person. (Laughs.) I work so fast. It doesn’t actually take up a lot of my time, and that’s why I’m like, “Oh, I’m gonna start a label and work with other artists and do 50,000 other things.”

How do you create so prolifically without repeating yourself? Because I approach every record completely differently.

Ratchet was made in a basement with one other dude, and then Hope was made in the middle of a manic episode in a weekend, and then Revelations was made after I got out of the mental hospital and had nothing to do but stay in my aunt’s house because I wasn’t allowed to do anything else. I just approach each one differently.

ISSUE 318 | DECEMBER, 2020

I don’t produce the same way each time or try to figure out what worked, what didn’t. I just want to make something that sounds good and feels cohesive.

You leave a lot up to where you’re at during that moment, both physically and mentally. The outside elements, basically.

Which is how life is. I think art should flow in that way too.

But you could’ve just made On the Regular over and over. I could have, but it wouldn’t fulfill me. That would’ve fulfilled my bank account, sure. (Laughs).

And that’s really important for me. I’m not a materialistic person at all, unfortunately. I wish I were because I’d be rich by now. I wish I were a materialistic, capitalistic-ass person, I really do. I don’t like being this queer communist fool.

Honestly, I’ve been bamboozled most of the time, but I can’t help it. I was just raised like that, and this goes back to my jack-of-all-trades personality, but I’ve always felt more wealthy with the knowledge that I have, and [with] what I can do.

As editor of Q Syndicate, Chris Azzopardi has interviewed a multitude of superstars, including Cher, Meryl Streep, Mariah Carey and Beyoncé. His work has also appeared in The New York Times, Vanity Fair, GQ and Billboard. Reach him via Twitter @chrisazzopardi

DECEMBER, 2020 |

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Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 318 | DECEMBER, 2020

You Can Count on Sharon Stone

BY CHRIS AZZOPARDI

That scene.

You know the one: the one in Basic Instinct where Sharon Stone’s legs

might explain why working for the first time with Ryan Murphy, known for bringing actresses over 50 (Jessica Lange, Kathy

are open. It’s been talked about and talked about, and talked

Bates, and now Stone) into his lavishly stylized queerverse of

about some more. It’s been talked about so much in the years

prestige TV, was so special. In Murphy’s dark dramedy Ratched

since it shook the world in 1992 that it has diminished the

for Netflix, an origins story of Nurse Ratched of One Flew Over

other non-crotch facets of Sharon Stone.

the Cuckoo’s Nest, the 62-year-old actress portrays the deli-

What nobody talks about anymore is her heart, her courage

ciously insane Lenore Osgood, a rich, twice-widowed mother

and her activism. As Stone pushed through the male-dom-

who’d rather spend time with her Capuchin monkey than her

inating Hollywood sphere of the 1990s to reach top-tier

queer son (played by openly gay actor Brandon Flynn). The

cinematic heights through her work in 1990’s Total Recall and

series also stars out actresses Sarah Paulson, as nurse Mildred

then Basic Instinct, an Oscar nomination for Casino solidifying

Ratched, and Sex and the City star and political activist Cynthia

her influential screen presence, she was giving a voice to the

Nixon, who portrays Gwendolyn Briggs, the press secretary for

voiceless. She was speaking up for marginalized women. She

the Governor of California.

was speaking up for the LGBTQ community. She was speaking up for herself.

When I spoke with Stone recently by phone, she did talk about the show’s queerness. But it was the touching story of

And to this day, she still does.

her late father, Joe, who took her gay friends under his wing,

Stone’s enduring affinity with the LGBTQ community

that you won’t forget.

PHOTO COURTESY OF NETFLIX

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ISSUE 318 | Qsaltlake.com

Where do you think your role as Lenore Osgood will rate on the “Things Queer People Love That I’ve Done” scale? Right?

(Laughs.) I have to say that it’s full of beauty and full of style and full of the immense tenderness that happens when we confront abuse. And because of the nature of what it is to live a queer life, I think all of that will be very moving.

While watching Ratched, I was reflecting on your LGBTQ roles. There’s been some that are blatantly queer, and others that are more naunced in their queerness.

Catwoman with Halle Berry came to mind because I really do think it’s part of the queer canon. (Laughs.) I think because the character was so intriguing — and so catty, also! And I think because the character was really based in an intense beauty-centric world, maybe. I just feel like my characters are all based in a “for everybody” kind of world, but I really believe there’s something when you work for people who are gay-friendly and people who hire gay people on the set, where costumes and sets and things have an opportunity to grow and become even more lavish.

We shot [Catwoman] in Tony Duquette’s estate house [Duquette was an artist who specialized in fantastical set designs for stage and film]; he was a very good friend of mine and, you know, he said to me when he met me, “I haven’t seen any of your pictures, darling.” But truly he was engaged in the [Canadian-American film actress and Duquette’s wife] Mary Pickford and [silent film actor] Douglas Fairbanks universe and swashbuckler films and all of these extremely lavish and beautiful filmmaking experiences.

One was not allowed to have a homosexual identity in those periods, so people had partners and the partnerships were agreements, and they were often very artistic agreements. In this case, very beautiful artistic agreements, very accomplished artistic agreements. And this was a way to love, be loved, be safe, be protective and work in the industry.

You’ve worked with straight directors as well as gay and queer directors. Ryan Murphy now among them. And when I think of

him and the gay men I know, I think of the reverence and respect we have for women.

Based on your experiences, what is different for you working with straight male directors versus gay or queer male directors and their treatment of the women that you’ve played? (Laughs tellingly, as if she has a lot to say about this.) That’s a beautiful question. Well, it doesn’t just break down to gay and straight; it breaks down to people who have self-respect and people who do not. And our business was very much dominated by straight men — and a lot of straight men who felt that self-respect for them meant that there wasn’t any for women.

Now that we are opening the business to a more sincere and honest appraisal of reality, women, men, gays and straights get to participate in the business with a treatment of white male abuse, which is starting to calm down but not completely. And as we can see from our worldview here and certainly from our national view, the resistance to the end of it, it’s so violent; the resistance to the end of white male supremacy is so violent, and the women who have thrived on being victims and being victimized are unsure of what to do too because being a victim is an identity and having that situation where you call your husband or wife “mommy and daddy” is also part of that system. There’s a whole mindset that goes with that system that’s leaving, and as that leaves we have to start addressing all the other things, the underbelly of that, like child abuse and pedophilia.

tear down the authority of the character.

When it comes to Ratched and working with someone like Ryan Murphy, who loves women differently than a straight man might, do you notice a difference in the way the character is being treated? For instance, was your experience different on, say, the set of Basic Instinct? Well, I was protected on Basic Instinct because I had a European director (Paul Verhoeven). I had a very intelligent European director, so I was protected. I was not abused at all, or I could never have been able to play that part. We made agreements even prior to shooting that if we had disagreements we would take them off the set and into a private place and talk so that it wouldn’t

Would you say that was the moment in your life when LGBTQ issues became especially important to you? I was already working for amfAR [The Foundation for AIDS Research, which Stone began working for in 1995, as Global Campaign Chair] at that time, so no. And I had already begun working for the Pediatric AIDS Foundation because my neighbor had funded it. So I was already heavily working on that with our pediatrician Dr. Peter S. Waldstein and his wife. I was into the pediatric aspect of it, and then I went to the Dominican Republic as a guest of the president because they were beginning to have extreme AIDS issues. This

When Basic Instinct was released, it agitated LGBTQ activists who were taken aback by your character being a bisexual psychopath. Seeing as though you were passionate about LGBTQ issues and you are an activist for the community, how did you process their concerns at the time? At the time we had all kinds of problems, not just LGBTQ people feeling like they were going to be abused and not knowing what was going to happen and showing great concern. But there were just people acting out all over the place over this movie. People blowing horns, trying to destroy the sets.

So [co-star] Michael Douglas and Sherry Lansing, the head of Paramount Pictures, and I sat down and we talked about it. I said that I would be very happy to become the person who talked about these LGBTQ issues and to discuss that what we were trying to do was put LGBTQ characters in a major motion picture from Paramount and that we were trying to, for the first time ever, do this.

That we were trying to give the LGBTQ community a platform. And that I would take on the position of being the voice of that platform if this community would trust me.

And you did. And I did. And Micheal and Sherry were like, “You’re willing to do this?” And I’m like, “I’m absolutely willing to do this, and there’s nothing about me that would cause people to distrust that that’s what I’m going to do.”

30 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | Q&A

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 318 | DECEMBER, 2020

was a really long time ago. This was even before amfAR. Then amfAR asked me if I would work for them.

Getting back to film, I’m curious about your role in the 2000 HBO film If These Walls Could Talk 2. You must still get stopped by lesbians everywhere you go for being a part of that movie. Well, I just think it was really great that we had this opportunity for Anne Heche to direct Ellen [DeGeneres] and I. Ellen was so brave and so cool to come out and use her platform to get so much good work done.

Vermont changed their laws after we did that film [the year the film was released, Vermont became the first U.S. state to pass same-sex civil union legislation]. The Vermont senator [James Merrill Jeffords] then changed from being a Republican to a Democrat, and I went to visit him at the Senate in Washington and there was a lot more action.

I know everybody wants to be mad at Ellen right now, but let’s not forget all of the incredible things she took on her own shoulders and her own back, and the pressure she took. I mean, when we did that, my parents were like, “Why are you doing this? And what are you doing?” And when I really explained it to them, my dad was like, “So you mean those two uncles that lived together down the road were queer?

And those old ladies were queer?” And I’m like, “Yeah, dad.” And he’s like, “Well, isn’t that nice. So they weren’t lonely and alone.” And I’m like, “Yeah, dad; they weren’t lonely and alone.” And he goes, “Well, that’s so good.”

That’s a beautiful response. Right? So he started to have this revelation about all these old men or old women that he’d known all his life that lived together that weren’t alone and lonely. He started inviting my gay friends up to the hunting cabin, including my friend whose father had kind of dismissed him as not being masculine enough to do anything. My dad would take them out on the boat and teach them how to shoot and fish and drive the boat and walk in the woods. These were my 40 and 50 year PHOTO COURTESY OF NETFLIX

old friends who were standing up and saying, “I had a dad but my real dad was Joe Stone because this is what he did for me. He taught me how to shoot a bow and arrow.” All of these things that their dads wouldn’t spend the time doing with them because they were mad at them for being gay.

I’m getting a mental image of me, a gay man, learning to walk in the woods from your father and what that experience might have been like. At my dad’s memorial, one of my friends stood up and he said, “I don’t suppose you would recognize why I’m such a fashion plate in these flannel shirts, but these were Joe Stone’s shirts and he treated me like I was his son.”

Did your dad ever see If These Wall Could Talk 2 then? Of course. He saw everything. He died 10 years ago, and he really became a very Zen-like dude who actually talked to a lot of my friends about a lot of big things in their lives. He used to do this thing where he’d go, “I’m gonna go out to the hardware store,” and he wouldn’t come back for seven or eight hours. He’d go to the hardware store and he’d go to the little shops and he’d go sit in the park and he’d literally wait for a person who needed to talk to him and help people with their life traumas. I can’t tell you how many people — giant businessmen, rock stars, political figures — that have come to me saying, “I knew your dad and I was having such a terrible time and I sat with your father and he helped me. Your father changed my life.”

It was just all these walks that he went on, and all these walks to the hardware store.

Do you think you’ve been influenced by him in regards to the work that you do for the LGBTQ community but also how vocal you are about other causes that matter to you? Yes, by both my mother and my father. Because my mother always said, “It doesn’t matter who you love, it matters that you love.”

I couldn’t end this interview without mentioning the fact that you performed with Kylie Minogue in Cannes for AIDS research, and then you gave the gays an iconic moment with Mariah Carey on the red carpet at the 2018 Golden Globes and said you were going to trade diamonds with her. Did you realize the gay magic you were creating in both of those moments with two of our biggest gay icons? No, but I can tell you that both of those women have been through their own personal major difficulties and giant triumphs. I admire both of them for being able to live in the public life and continue to be so generous.

I admire that about you because you have also been that person. I’m so happy we have your voice and that it’s been heard. Thank you. One-hundred percent, you can count on me. Q As editor of Q Syndicate, Chris Azzopardi has interviewed a multitude of superstars, including Cher, Meryl Streep, Mariah Carey and Beyoncé. His work has also appeared in The New York Times, Vanity Fair, GQ and Billboard. Reach him via Twitter @chrisazzopardi.

Have You Been Diagnosed With HIV/AIDS?

DECEMBER, 2020 |

Q&A | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 31

ISSUE 318 | Qsaltlake.com

Did you know there are local and state agencies devoted to helping people who are living with HIV/AIDS? Are you familiar with the Ryan White Part B Program?

The Ryan White Part B Program is administered by the Utah Department of Health (UDOH). The Ryan White Part B Program works through contracted providers to deliver services to people living with HIV/AIDS who meet eligibility requirements (HIV positive, reside in Utah, and meet Ryan White Part B Program income guideline).

The services within the Ryan White Part B Program are FREE if you meet the eligibility requirement. The Ryan White Part B Program can assist with:

• Medication • Health insurance • Dental visits • Medical co -pays • Case management • Housing • Food insecurity • And many more

Where To Get Treatment University of Utah Clinic 1A Phone: 801-585-2031 https://healthcare.utah.edu/infectiousdiseases/ Utah AIDS Foundation Phone: 801-487-2323 https://www.utahaids.org/

For More Information Utah Department of Health Phone: 801-538-6191 https://ptc.health.utah.gov/ HIV Prevention, Testing, Treatment, and Resources

32 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | HOLLYWOOD

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 318 | DECEMBER, 2020

deep inside hollywood

BY ROMEO SAN VICENTE

Clive Barker comes home to Hellraiser

making sexy jokes about Johnny Mathis.

And while you’re at it go learn about Johnny Mathis, too.

Much like The Babadook, we’ve long assumed Pinhead from Hellraiser to be queer like us. Just a vibe we got, really, but we believe our stanning is sound because the man who created him, Clive Barker, is also queer like us. And now Barker has signed on to participate in the production of an in-development HBO series starring our favorite elder monster. Hellraiser the series will explore the story of the Cenobites (former humans turned monsters) and will be written by Mark Verheiden (Battlestar Galactica, and he’ll also serve as showrunner) and Michael Dougherty (Trick r’ Treat), with David Gordon Green committed to directing early episodes. There’s no cast yet, and no release date set from HBO (everyone keeps saying 2021 but in reality it might be more like 2022), but it’s certainly something creepy and cool to look forward to. And with Barker now serving as an executive producer, we’re hopeful that it’ll all turn out as weird as we want it to be.

Kids in The Hall, no longer kids, back in the hall You may worship at the altar of SCTV and currently get your laughs from Schitt’s Creek and Letterkenny, but never forget the legendary Kids in the Hall, Canada’s comedy lifeline to LGBTQ television audiences during the late 1980s and early ’90s. The trail blazed by Dave Foley, Mark McKinney, Scott Thompson, Kevin McDonald and Bruce McCulloch made queer comedy history, and now they’re back. Thirty-two years after the original series arrived on Canada’s CBC, the gang is returning for eight new episodes on Amazon Prime Video. Original producer Lorne Michaels will step back in, as well, and this will be the first new content from the sketch comedy team since 2010’s CBC limited series. And now a message to young people: this is your opportunity to go watch the original series and learn to respect the queenly majesty of Scott Thompson as Buddy Cole on a barstool PHOTOS: KATHCLICK

Lady Bunny and Bianca Del Rio are Hateful Hags “Enough with COVID and politics,” says legendary drag queen Lady Bunny. “It’s time for something really important… back-stabbing drag queens!” And while COVID and politics are sort of inescapable right now, she has a point, which is why she and queen Bianca Del Rio are launching HHN: Hateful Hags Network on Vimeo as we speak. The pair of hosts will bring audiences news from the drag world, roast other queens as often as possible, and then do a little musical number from time to time. Sounds simple enough, and that’s about all we have energy for at the moment anyway. And besides, if Trixie and Katya (and, obviously, RuPaul) have taught us anything, it’s that drag queens can slap together a show for 35 cents and make it werq. We’re ready for the wigs, the shade, and the reads. It’s the holidays, after all.

Fried Green Tomatoes, but with lesbians – and Reba – this time?

Ellen Page is game for 1UP Academy Award nominee Ellen Page (hope you didn’t forget about that Juno Best Actress nomination) and Paris Berelc (Hubie Halloween, Disney’s Lab Rats: Elite Force) are teaming up for 1UP, a gaming comedy feature film for BuzzFeed Studios. Berelc will play a gamer who quits her college e-sports team because of the misogyny of her male teammates, and then assembles an all-female team with the help of a gaming coach (Page) with some scandal in her past. Written by actor/writer Julia Yorks (Jack Reacher, The Adventures of Puss in Boots), and directed

by Kyle Newman (Fanboys), it’ll be the second time Page has been associated with gaming: she was part of 2013’s Beyond: Two Souls, an interactive drama/ Sony PlayStation game that also featured Willem Dafoe. And here you were thinking Inception was the strangest thing she’d done in her career.

In the early ’90s, when Fannie Flagg’s novel, Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistle Stop Café was adapted to the big screen as Fried Green Tomatoes, the book’s lesbian themes were dialed way down. Ladies in love became very close friends and straight audiences were allowed to feel comfortable. But that was 30 years ago, straight audiences have evolved somewhat, and now NBC has put FGT back in development as a weekly dramatic series. Legendary progressive creator Norman Lear is executive producing, and Reba McEntire is attached to star. The story will revolve around Idgie (McEntire) – whose relationship with a woman was the center of the novel – returning to the small town where the first story took place and dealing with the events of the past. It’s early yet, and the fractured entertainment landscape makes no promises, but with TV production slowly ramping up again, then this one could see its way to screens sometime in 2021.

And what nice news it could turn out to be; Primetime Lesbian Reba is absolutely something to hope for.

DECEMBER, 2020 |

HOLLYWOOD | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 33

ISSUE 318 | Qsaltlake.com

Tegan and Sara go back to High School IMDb TV, Amazon’s free streaming service, is teaming up with recording artists Tegan and Sara Quin for High School, a coming-of-age comedy series based on the bestselling memoir the twin sisters co-wrote. Their situation was an unusual one, and reflected in the story: twin sisters growing up, discovering themselves in music as an outlet and an identity, all while coming to terms with being queer.

Adding another layer of queer cred, actor-director Clea DuVall (Happiest Season) is writing the pilot and will also direct, all for Brad Pitt’s Plan B production company. And now that you know IMDb has a streaming service – admit it, you didn’t until just now – you also have a reason to go there when High School drops there.

Adam Rippon sitcom skates over to NBC Good news or best news? America’s gay figure skating Olympic medal scoring sweetheart, Adam Rippon, is developing a sitcom for NBC. Now, Rippon is unquestionably a world-class athlete. But if you’ve ever seen him on a talk show or, well, anywhere, you also know that he’s simultaneously built for the world of comedy, so this was kind of a no-brainer.

The as-yet-untitled series will be set in

the world of figure skating, naturally, and center on a female skater who battles injuries, her family and other skaters on the way to ice stardom. Grace and Frankie vet Billy Finnegan will write the series from Rippon and co-creator Susan Kittenplan’s story. No cast set yet, no dates, just a great plan, and we’re readier than ready.

Teen drag musical Everybody’s Talking About Jamie will dress up 2021 One of the many cultural accomplishments of RuPaul’s Drag Race is something that few high school guidance counselors could have predicted: the emergence of drag as a viable career path. But now we’re here in a world where Trixie and Katya have had their own TV show, books and tours, and what drag-obsessed teen wouldn’t consider the glamorous possibil-

ities? Well, based on a true story, they say, comes Everybody’s Talking About Jamie, the film adaptation of the hit stage musical about a 16-year-old named Jamie (newcomer Max Harwood) who, while trying to find his place in the world, decides that drag queen stardom is his future.

And because this is a musical, that happy ending is assured, thanks to supportive friends and parents (Catastrophe star Sharon Horgan and Can You Ever Forgive Me? Oscar nominee Richard E. Grant co-star) who help him realize his destiny in the spotlight. And perfect timing: 20th Century Studios is set to release the film in February of 2021, in the middle of what pandemic experts are predicting will be a pretty tough winter. We’re all going to need Jamie’s queer blast of sunshine, music, dancing, and wigs by then. Q Romeo San Vicente is an out-of-control Zamboni on fire.

34 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | COMICS

Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 318 | DECEMBER, 2020

PUZZLES | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 35

DECEMBER, 2020 | ISSUE 318 | Qsaltlake.com

Kellyoke

Each Sudoku puzzle has a unique solution which can be reached logically without guessing. Enter digits 1 through 9 into the blank spaces. Every row must contain one of each digit, as must each column and each 3x3 square. Qdoku

Q doku Level: Medium

4

7 4

1 7 5

9

8

7

9

3 6

6 8 5

9 3

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1

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45 Novelist Brown 48 Kelly’s song about the negative side ACROSS 52 Wheel tooth 1 Shakespeare’s foot, but not his 12 inches 53 AARP concern 5 Old Queens location 54 Kelly of Kellyoke 59 Kopay’s team 9 “Livin’ La ___ Loca” 60 One who screws 13 It’s sold in bars around 14 Loads 62 Sophie B. Hawkins’ 15 Dry as a bone “As ___ Me Down” 16 Like a Peter Lorre 63 LA Dodger, for one film 64 Style some hair, in 17 Incur, as debts Hairspray 18 WKRP actress 65 Re or so Anderson 66 They have boughs 19 Kelly’s song about for bows “what doesn’t kill 67 Match parts, to you...”

Navratilova 21 Airport area 68 Tale of adventure 23 Game with “Skip” cards DOWN 24 Kelly’s song about 1 Charged particles “There’s a wolf that 2 Loads preys...”

3 Golda of Israel 26 Bewitched actor Dick 4 Queens and others 30 Floor covering 5 Andrew of Melrose 31 “Well, Did You ___” Place 32 Steinem’s “___ Play- 6 Painter Matisse boy Bunny” 7 La mer, essentially 34 Charlotte of Facts 8 Appreciation display of Life on Broadway 37 Kelly’s song about 9 Addams Family ___ self-sufficiency 10 Subtle sarcasm 41 AOL, e.g.

11 Dog from Down 42 Bearing Under 43 Give a lot of mouth 12 “...farewell, auf Wiedersehen, ___” 44 Successful pitch PUZZLE SOLUTIONS ON PAGE 38

14 About one percent of air 20 U-turn from SSW 22 Phantom’s Opera instrument 25 Cloth merchant 26 Sweet opening?

27 Hertz competitor 28 Sound like Harvey Fierstein 29 Made neat 33 Bentley of American Beauty 34 Paper amount 35 Tales of the City’s Madrigal 36 Novel conclusion 38 Successful cross-dresser’s boast?

39 “Wide open” 40 Impersonator of males 44 They go down 46 Empathetic phrase 47 Hard top?

48 Kaye of Hans Christian Anderson 49 Able to bend over 50 Continue to get The Advocate 51 Ostentatious display 55 More, to a minimalist 56 Fruit flavor for gin 57 Stallion’s supper 58 No, in Moscow 61 Sandra, in a Grease song

36 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | SEX

sex and salt lake city

The safety lessons of porn

BY DR. LAURIE BENNETT-COOK

So I was

scrolling through internet porn today, as one does, and I came upon a video that was so timely. A young woman walks into an apartment unannounced when a male, wearing an N95 mask, stops her.

“Step Back! Where’s your protection?!”, he shouts all animated and alarmed.

She acts all cutesy and says: “Oh c’mon, you know I’m safe.”

He’s insistent and goes on about how even if a person has been tested they may not always be safe to play. To that, she juts out her bottom lip, sways from side to side, and pouts. The porn music makes a shift as he reaches into his back pockets.

From one he pulls out a condom, and from the other, he pulls out an N95 mask.

He then dramatically places the condom on himself and the mask on her. From there the music shifts again and the porn goes like most other porn scripts, except for the two keeping their masks on the entire time.

As an educator, it was corny, sure, but it was also so necessary and normalizing.

The truth is we are in the middle of an incredibly horrible pandemic. The numbers are rising daily and many of us can now name a few people, if not ourselves, who have been sick. Despite this fact, we are still humans, sexual beings, and for many, libidos have not decreased. For many, the confinement and restrictions have only increased the desire to connect with others sexually.

Let’s be honest, this adjustment to limiting our get-togethers is tough on most of us. Before COVID, I hosted a couple of cuddles a month at my house as well as a party or two that was often sexual in nature. It was only months ago, but it honestly feels like years. I know many who can relate.

So how do we get our touch needs to be met? Is the porn I watched this morning a good indicator of how to play going forward? Well, unless you’re only

playing with someone in your immediate, intimate circle, then yeah.

Here’s the thing, most of us are pretty well-schooled in how to prevent catching the flu, a cold, or an STI. Most of us have are also schooled on how to mitigate the chances of contracting or passing on COVID. But for whatever reason, many are still resistant to taking precautions with this one.

While it may be true that most people don’t get “that sick.” Most people will only feel like they’ve had the flu or a nasty cold. Personally, I don’t even want to experience a cold or the flu, and getting sexy with someone isn’t worth it to me. Unfortunately, we don’t have very good role models in our leadership regarding how to go about the world, let alone play, safely, so we all have to assess our own risk factors and make decisions for ourselves. The sucky part is like many things in life, the decisions we make for ourselves oftentimes affect others.

So, back to the sex. After watching the COVID porn, I sat back and considered how clients and friends are managing sex

Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 318 | DECEMBER, 2020

play right now. It appears that many people are assessing how one handles COVID precautions as a good indicator of how one handles STIs. Personally, I love this.

Safer sex talks have become more and more commonplace. It’s not unusual to ask or be asked if barriers are desired when playing and about the results of a most recent STI test. Adding to that conversation should be: “What are your social practices right now?” “Do you have a small social circle or are you attending parties?” “How many other partners are you seeing and what, if any, barriers (masks included) do you use?”

These may seem like nosey questions, but let’s be real, when the sex brain takes

over it’s easy for us to become less riskaware. We are our own best advocates. We are our own best resource for knowledge of our risk tolerance. We are our own best lover and protector of our bodies. If we’re not looking out for ourselves, it’d be foolish to assume someone else is.

So yes, the porn was corny. But let’s be real… Most porn is corny. Regardless of the masks both people in the porn still got off — or at least writhed around and made all the porn vocals leading us to believe they got off. And had either one of them had anything contagious their chances of passing it along were less? Q Dr. Laurie Bennett-Cook is a Clinical Sexologist in Salt Lake City. She can be reached at DrLaurieBennettCook@ gmail.com

DECEMBER, 2020 | ISSUE 318 | Qsaltlake.com

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MARKETPLACE | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 37

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38 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | QMMUNITY

7 6 2 4 5 3 1 8 9

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umen.org

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OUT U.S. OLYMPIC MEN’S SLOPESTYLE SILVER MEDALIST GUS KENWORTHY

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Puzzle Solutions

 utahpridecenter. org/programs/youthfamily-programs/

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SUPPORT

Alcoholics Anonymous 801-484-7871  utahaa.org LGBT meetings: Sun. 3p Acceptance Group, UPC,1380 S Main Tues. 8:15p Live & Let Live, Mt Tabor Lutheran, 175 S 700 E Wed. 7p Sober Today, 375 Harrison Blvd, Ogden Fri. 8p Stonewall Group, Mt Tabor Lutheran, 175 S 700 E

9 7 3 1 8 4 5 6 2 9 4 8 7 1 3 8 2 5 9 6 4

SPORTS

QUAC — Queer Utah Aquatic Club  quacquac.org  questions@ quacquac.org Salt Lake Goodtime Bowling League  bit.ly/slgoodtime Stonewall Sports SLC  fb.me/SLCStonewall  stonewallsaltlakecity. leagueapps.com 385-243-1828 Utah Gay Football League  UtahGayFootballLeague.com  fb.me/UtahGayFootballLeague Venture Out Utah  facebook.com/groups/ Venture.OUT.Utah

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RELIGIOUS

First Baptist Church  firstbaptist-slc.org * office@firstbaptistslc.org 11a Sundays 777 S 1300 E 801-582-4921 Sacred Light of Christ  slcchurch.org 823 S 600 E 801-595-0052 11a Sundays

utahpridecenter.org

Alternative Garden Club  bit.ly/altgarden * altgardenclub@gmail.com blackBOARD Men’s Kink/Sex/BDSM education, 1st, 3rd Mons.  blackbootsslc.org blackBOOTS Kink/BDSM Men’s leather/kink/ fetish/BDSM 4th Sats.  blackbootsslc.org Gay Writes writing group, DiverseCity 6:30 pm 2nd, 4th Mondays, Community Writing Ctr, 210 E 400 S Men Who Move  menwhomove.org OWLS of Utah (Older, Wiser, Lesbian. Sisters)  bit.ly/owlsutah qVinum Wine Tasting  qvinum.com Sage Utah, Seniors  fb.me/sageutah  sageutah@ utahpridecenter.org 801-557-9203 Temple Squares Square Dance Club  templesquares.org 801-449-1293 Utah Bears  utahbears.com  fb.me/utahbears  info@utahbears.com

3 5 9 2 6 1 8 4 7

POLITICAL

Equality Utah  equalityutah.org * info@equalityutah.org 175 W 200 S, Ste 1004 801-355-3479 Utah Libertarian Party 6885 S State St #200 888-957-8824 Utah Log Cabin Republicans  bit.ly/logcabinutah 801-657-9611 Utah Stonewall Democrats  utahstonewalldemocrats.org  fb.me/ utahstonewalldems

 1to5club@

YOUTH/COLLEGE

Encircle LGBTQ Family and Youth Resource Ctr  encircletogether.org fb.me/encircletogether 91 W 200 S, Provo, 331 S 600 E, SLC Families Like Ours (ages 2-10)  utahpridecenter.org/ programs/youth-familyprograms/ Gay-Straight Alliance Network  gsanetwork.org Salt Lake Community College LGBTQ+ 8 slcc.edu/lgbtq/ University of Utah LGBT Resource Center 8 lgbt.utah.edu 200 S Central Campus Dr Rm 409 801-587-7973 USGA at BYU  usgabyu.com  fb.me/UsgaAtByu Utah State Univ. Access & Diversity Ctr  inclusion.usu.edu/ lgbtqa Utah Valley Univ Spectrum  facebook.com/ groups/uvuspectrum Weber State University LGBT Resource Center  weber.edu/ lgbtresourcecenter 801-626-7271 Youth Activity Night ages 10-14, 14-20  utahpridecenter.org/ programs/youth-familyprograms/

2 7 6 4 5 8 3 9 1

HEALTH & HIV

Peer Support for Mental Illness — PSMI Thurs 7pm, Utah Pride Ctr Planned Parenthood 654 S 900 E 800-230-PLAN Salt Lake County Health Dept HIV/STD Clinic 660 S 200 E, 4th Floor Walk-ins M–F 10a–4p Appts 385-468-4242 Utah AIDS Foundation  utahaids.org * mail@utahaids.org 1408 S 1100 E 801-487-2323

Rainbow Law Free Clinic 2nd Thurs 6:30–7:30pm UofU Law School, 383 S University St

1 to 5 Club (bisexual)  fb.me/1to5ClubUtah

Youth Survivors of Suicide Attempt  utahpridecenter.org/ programs/youth-familyprograms/  youthsosa@ utahpridecenter.org

Crystal Meth Anon  crystalmeth.org Sun. 1:30pm Clean, Sober & Proud LGBTQIA+Straight USARA, 180 E 2100 S LifeRing Secular Recovery 801-608-8146  liferingutah.org Sun. 10am Univ. Neuropsychiatric Institute, 501 Chipeta Way #1566 Thurs. 7pm, USARA, 180 E 2100 S, #100 Sat. 11am, First Baptist Church, 777 S 1300 E Men’s Support Group  utahpridecenter. org/programs/lgbtqadults/  joshuabravo@ utahpridecenter.org Survivors of Suicide Attempt  bit.ly/upc_sosa  sosa@ utahpridecenter.org Trans Adult Support  utahpridecenter.org/ programs/lgbtq-adults/  lanegardinier@ utahpridecenter.org TransAction  utahpridecenter.org/ programs/transaction/ Sundays 2–3:30pm Women’s Support Group  utahpridecenter.org/ programs/lgbtq-adults/  mariananibley@ utahpridecenter.org Youth Support Group ages 10-14, 14-20

8 4 1 7 9 3 6 5 2

DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

National Domestic Violence Hotline 1-800-799-7233 YWCA of Salt Lake  ywca.org/saltlakecity 322 E 300 S 801-537-8600

LEGAL

SOCIAL

Weds 6pm Raw Bean Coffee, 611 W Temple Utah Male Naturists  umen.org  info@umen.org Utah Pride Center  utahpridecenter.org  info@utahpridecenter.org 1380 S Main St 801-539-8800 Venture OUT Utah  bit.ly/GetOutsideUtah

1 3 7 9 4 2 5 8 6

LGBTQ-Affirmative Psycho-therapists Guild of Utah  lgbtqtherapists.com * jim@lgbtqtherapists.com Utah Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce  utahgaychamber.com * info@utahgaychamber.com LGBT & Allied Lawyers of Utah  lgbtutahlawyers.com * lgbtutahlawyers@gmail.com Utah Independent Business Coalition  utahindependentbusiness.org 801-879-4928

HOMELESS SVCS

VOA Homeless Youth Resource Ctr, ages 15–21 880 S 400 W 801-364-0744 Transition Homes: Young Men’s 801-433-1713 Young Women’s 801-359-5545

Wasatch Metropolitan Community Church  wasatchmcc.org 801-889-8764 Sundays except the 2nd Sunday, 11:15a at Crone’s Hollow, 3834 S. Main

6 8 5 3 1 7 4 2 9

BUSINESS

Weber-Morgan Health Mon., Weds 1-4:30p 477 23rd St, Ogden Appt 801-399-7250

9 2 4 5 8 6 1 7 3

Qmmunity Groups

Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 318 | DECEMBER, 2020

BOOK REVIEW | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 39

DECEMBER, 2020 | ISSUE 318 | Qsaltlake.com

the bookworm sez REVIEW BY TERRI SCHLICHENMEYER

‘TMI: My Life in Scandal’

BY PEREZ HILTON WITH LEIF ERIKSSON AND MARTIN SVENSSON C.2020, CHICAGO REVIEW PRESS, $26.99, 229 PAGES

You’re allowed to change your mind.

You grow, get a few experiences under your belt, and things might look a bit different. You can have a change of heart then, and pivot your life in a different direction. You can take do-overs and take-backs, but carefully. And as in the new book TMI by Perez Hilton (with Leif Eriksson and Martin Svensson), you can ask for

forgiveness, too.

If you knew Mario Armando Lavandiera Jr. when he was a child, you’d be surprised at the man he is today. He says he had a good childhood but he was a “different” kid then and was often bullied: among other indignities, his classmates called him “the Fat Kid” because he loved to eat.

That last part hasn’t changed. What has is that Lavandiera is now thinner, famous, and known by a nicer name: Perez Hilton. And no, if you’re wondering, Paris Hilton “never bothered” to sue him over the lookalike name, “though she definitely could have.”

This transformation didn’t happen overnight.

By the time he moved to New York to attend college, Hilton knew for sure that he was gay; while there, he gained friends, a pile of debt, and a mitt full of credit cards. Down but not out, he started a series of jobs and launched a series

of websites that both spanned time in New York and L.A., and that got him into trouble in one way or another. Then a photogra-friend leaked a few celeb pictures his way, Perez posted them on his website, and he was famous, literally overnight.

And that was good — for a while. Hilton partied near-constantly, busted into celebrity events, became “wifey” with Gaga, clubbed with Jessica Simpson, and hung with Paris Hilton.

And then he made a video for a national cause that caused him to see the hurt he’d left…

Could it be that the infamous author and gossip blogger Perez Hilton has…. softened?

Yes, mostly. There’s a whole lot less venom inside TMI than you might expect from Hilton, but fans won’t be entirely bereft. There’s still a little spark of gossip here, names dropped, and stories propped up and left on the roadside for embarrassment or for examina-

tion. Those are accompanied in this memoir by a glint-in-hiseye tone, and the sneakiest of snark hidden here and there, but that’s often tendered by tenderness.

The surprise — or the shock, depending on your level of fandom — is that Hilton apologizes to several people he feels he hurt; and he expresses a degree of regret for having lost good, close friends because he reported gossip about them despite the friendship. It’s contrition that feels like it came from a battered schoolyard bully, only genuine.

Hilton is a father now and he writes with an unabashed love for his kids, from a refreshing, seemingly-happier place in his life. TMI still includes plenty of Hiltonized Too Much Information, some snickers, and a hint of tattle-tale, but if you’ve never been much of a fan, here’s a chance to change your mind. Q

q scopes DECEMBER

BY SAM KELLEY-MILLS

ARIES March 20–April 19

There isn’t much break in the action. Slow things down in order to maintain momentum. Lay low for a while, even if it means putting people on hold. You don’t need the drama intense friction, though there could certainly be an issue. Indulge in much needed romance and enjoy.

TAURUS Apr 20–May 20

You are being reflectivie and the past means more now because of a strange development in your belief system. No matter what the future holds, the past will allow you to grasp your inner desires. To keep expectations low is not always right, bu you need something to hold on to.

GEMINI May 21–June 20

Truth is bent with the lens of time and memories change. Be open to morphing perceptions. Realize that truth is an asset. A relationship is suffering as a result of repeated antagonizing from both sides. It’s time to kiss and make up in the way you know best,

which may get dirty.

CANCER June 21–July 22

While a dependency on others isn’t common for you, seeing benefit in conflicting ideas has always kept you grounded. Trying turning a foe into an ally to see the world from a new point of view. No one is inherently bad by simply seeing things differently. Find truth in reflecting.

LIBRA Sept 23–October 22

Take time to eliminate the impossible and streamline everything. It’s time to ease up on expectations. Have fewer but better friends, and find a career that works for you. Act now while things are lowbrow, because the future is bound to become chaotic for you soon.

SCORPIO Oct. 23–Nov. 21

LEO July 23–August 22

Focus energy into a personal relationship. A highly enlightened person will touch you in ways never thought possible. Clear the schedule to spend more time with them, but be careful of being too obsessed. While there is much to gained, there is a risk of losing yourself as well.

VIRGO August 23–Sep. 2

Nov. 22–December 20.

Put trust into a respected acquaintance. Gain some levity in a work position and gain favor with the boss. It may not be the most dignified thing to do, but it will help a great deal. Everything is merging into one big opportunity, so keep an open mind and smile. Things will work out.

You set the bar high, but only because much is expected from friends and family. But what matters to you doesn’t always matter to them.

Back off from someone who needs space. It’s likely you need space too.

Grow from experiences, and the world will seem brighter as a result.

SAGITTARIUS

Don’t spend too much time on one project and keep interests varied.

This will not only prevent boredom, but agitation. Look deeper into finding truth behind a nagging problem, and nip it in the bud. People can often get in your way, so to take a different path toward happiness.

CAPRICORN Dec 21–Jan 19

Relationships are about give and take. It is better to give rather than receive. Let reason provides a path to personal growth. A mission requires much effort, but the real question is whether it matters at all. Find a sense of reason and purpose and learn to expand your horizons.

AQUARIUS Jan. 20–Feb. 18

Despite a temptation to flee, life is actually pretty good. Don’t fear eliminating a relationship that isn’t doing much for you, especially if it’s setting you off in the wrong ways. There is too much time wasted on the frivolous issues of others. When life gives you variety, adapt with style.

PISCES Feb 19–Mar 19

It might be wise to back off with an old friend. They might simply be oversensitive to your direct way of doing things. A substantial pay off is very probable and bonding with this person could be life changing. The best that could happen is yet to come so keep positive right now!. Q

40 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | Q&A

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 318 | DECEMBER, 2020

A Bright Light in the Dark Out musician Rod Thomas centers LGBTQ culture with his disco-laden third album

BY CHRIS AZZOPARDI

The name

Rod Thomas might not be instantly recognizable, but it’s likely you’ve come across the one he uses on stage. As Bright Light Bright Light, Thomas has been a staple of the international LGBTQ music scene for the last 10 years, performing for Cher on the European leg of her 2019 tour and collaborating on a song with Elton John.

The independent Welsh singer-songwriter’s latest album, Fun City, is awash in the queer make-up of disco culture, fittingly corralling a roster of LGBTQ notables including Andy Bell of Erasure, Jake Shears, Justin Vivian Bond and Sam Sparro.

PHOTOS: WARREN PIECE

Leading up to its release, what’s been the day-to-day of getting this album out? It’s been trying to rethink the whole presentation of it because it’s very LGBTQ+ focused. What I’ve been working on with my agent this last year-and-a-half is touring with other queer artists and going to smaller spaces in different cities and working with LGBTQ+ local artists and drag performers. We wanted to make it like “Soul Train circus comes to town” and also highlight local LGBTQ+ businesses, organizations and charities and really use it to expand on the story of the record, which is respect for queer culture.

Not being able to do that this year has been kind of depressing because it

really was meant to be much more than this album, like before it was hip to be fucking amplifying people’s voices the whole point of this record was to shine a light on artists that people overlook or local talent that people don’t really get a chance to hear about. Not really being able to do that properly felt just a bit sad. Hopefully next year I can take that on the road and do it then, if any of these venues are still open.

Have you thought about a way to reconfigure your plan for a virtual audience? I don’t think it’s very effective. I really don’t think it is. I think people are so exhausted by online presence and online events that I just don’t think it’s going to have any impact, so I really do think

DECEMBER, 2020 |

Q&A | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 41

ISSUE 318 | Qsaltlake.com

it needs to happen when there’s people in a room. Online there’s just so much white noise that you can’t really cut through, especially if you don’t have the budget of a Dua Lipa or Miley Cyrus — who I love. But the minute they put out a song then that kind of dominates the gay male focus.

Your song with Justin Vivian Bond, “Saying Goodbye Is Exhausting,” is really touching. What can you say about that song? I feel like a big part of gay life is losing people too young, and that’s about a friend. I don’t often write that kind of lyric about personal loss, but that is about a friend who died two years ago and was 33, 34 years old. Throughout time people have been murdered by homophobes, but also with the AIDS crisis and everything that LGBTQ+ people have gone through, it has been watching their contemporaries or their friends or their family die too young.

Even during the last three weeks we’ve seen Black person after Black person murdered, trans woman after trans woman murdered. Saying goodbye and watching these people disappear is absolutely exhausting when people have the power to stop it and literally nobody that it doesn’t affect gives a fuck and it’s just unforgivable. I don’t understand where the compassion in society has gone. Even if you were the shittiest white person living, how do you not understand that watching person after person die is exhausting?

I remember reading that you’re a mood board person. What did your mood boards look like for this album? Oh, fucking mental. (Laughs.) It was really mental.

Let me see if I can find it. I think I have it. I still keep printouts of everything.

You should. Yeah, I do. My apartment is a lunatic asylum.

Well, you’re an artist. Let’s go with that, yeah. (Laughs.) One of the boards is: Eyes of Laura Mars. Body Double. The Stepford Wives. Escape from New York.

Party Girl. Silence=Death and the pink triangle. Showgirls. And Sylvester’s live album cover. I wanted it to feel like it sort of spoke to or about different parts of queer culture that I’ve really learned a lot from or was really inspired by through the years, so I kind of hope it does that in some loose way. Also, on a lighter note: Big Trouble in Little China.

After Hours. Cat People. Blade Runner.

Sweet Charity, with Shirley MacLaine.

How does Showgirls fit into the vibe of the album? Delusion. (Laughs.)

Do you usually reference a lot of films when you’re making music? Yes, it’s mostly film that I reference, honestly.

Looking at references makes me want to make a song that sounds like those images, and I find that much more inspiring than a playlist of songs because film speaks to me a little bit more and teases images out in my brain.

While we’re on the topic of film, what made Gremlins so special to you that you named yourself after the Gizmo line “bright light, bright light”? (Laughs.)

I honestly don’t know. I don’t think I named myself after that because it was a particularly special film. When I was thinking about what to call myself with my manager at the time, that is the first thing that came into my head. I thought, “God, that’s pretty shit,” but then I couldn’t think of anything better, and it kind of stuck. I liked that it alluded to dance floors and nightlife and electricity and electronic music. It just seemed to work. And I’m a huge fan of the Gremlins franchise, so that definitely works for me too.

And I read that the title was inspired by a comment made by former NYC mayor John V. Lindsay on his first day in office in 1966, amidst a crippling transit strike.

Is that right? Yeah, it was. Basically when he took over on his first day of office the whole city fell to shit and it was a disaster. There was a transit strike and the lights went out and everyone just

lost their minds and one of his adversaries was like, “Oh, so you’re still happy to be the mayor?” And he was like, “I still think it’s a fun city.”

So I kind of took the idea of this very flawed paradise and applied that to how queer people have had to live the whole time. It’s like, you move to LA, New York, Atlanta, whatever is your city, to escape the suburbia you’re not safe in.

But then you get to the city, which has things like other gay people, nightlife, sex, glamour, jobs. It has everything.

But you also have the prejudice and the danger and the need to keep both eyes open all the time whilst remembering to celebrate yourself and have fun. So Fun City, for me, is like this place that you aspire to live in. But it’s also a double-edged sword because it could be your downfall.

Did you personally experience this? Yeah.

Where I grew up is absolutely not tolerant of gay people. When I was young I grew up in the middle of nowhere, in like an old coal mining valley in South Wales, which was homophobic. So, for me, it was going to London and then moving from London to New York; it’s like chasing the best version of yourself and finding a place that allows you to be the best version of yourself with the people you want to be surrounded by.

Has disco and dance music been a catharsis for you? Dance, yeah. The whole ethos of disco from my understanding is: dancing through pain, or singing through turmoil, or celebrating through adversity. So referencing that in relation to what I wanted to talk about with the record felt kind of right to me. A lot of gay culture was born and bred from the love of disco music, and the joy and togetherness it inspired is still very much at the heart of LGBTQ+ culture. Q As editor of Q Syndicate, Chris Azzopardi has interviewed a multitude of superstars, including Cher, Meryl Streep, Mariah Carey and Beyoncé. His work has also appeared in The New York Times, Vanity Fair, GQ and Billboard. Reach him via Twitter @chrisazzopardi.

42 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | FINAL WORD

Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 318 | DECEMBER, 2020

the perils of petunia pap smear

A tale of a dead horse

BY PETUNIA PAP SMEAR

The road

to the Grand Canyon is fraught with danger and excitement.

In August, after the smoldering and steaming mass of metal that was my beloved Queertanic VI blew its head gasket, I quickly searched for, and purchased a suitable, if not newer and better, replacement. Queertanic VII is my first car in 35 years that is less than 10 years old. So, what does a queen do when she has a new ride? Why take it on a road trip of course.

So, I loaded many boxes and bags of snacks into the about-to-be-christened Queertanic. I put on my most comfortable caftan, opera-length driving gloves, and my most heavy hair sprayed beehive wig (to withstand wind damage, of course) and hit the road. Grand Canyon, here I come! When I was about 15 miles down the road happily singing along to ABBA, I suddenly realized that Mr. Pap Smear was not in the car. Apparently, in all the excitement and confusion of loading the car, I had left him standing in the driveway, so I had to turn around to fetch him.

Halfway through Millard County, my tummy began to rumble, more than the many snacks I took with me. I began “Man’s Search for Happiness”, or in other words, the hunt for a Chuck-A-Rama to keep my breasticles from deflating. I always believed that Chuck-A-Rama had locations everywhere in Utah. Well, I was extremely sad to discover that, in the era of COVID in rural Utah, a buffet of any kind was out of the question and a drive-thru was the only option. Of course, I would have preferred to refill my breasticles at a fine dining establishment such as Golden Corral, but in this instance, I settled for a dozen Big Macs and fries.

Donald Trump, eat your heart out!

When we reached Page, Arizona, we stopped to watch the sunset at Dead Horse Point State Park. At the entry booth and we were cheerfully greeted by a very handsome park ranger wearing an extremely fetching and form-fitting uni-

form, snugly stretched over some obvious bulging biceps. Be still my fluttering heart. He informed us that the viewpoint was a simple hike on an easy-going smooth trail, and could cover it in less than 10 minutes. OK! We parked, I pulled out my rolling walker and set out along the path. Of course, some curves hid the true extent of the trail. As we rounded the first bend, the real extent of the footpath became apparent. My God, it was half a mile long descending a hill. I lamented, what goes down must eventually come back up!

Shit! This might kill me. Thank god, I at least wore sensible shoes. Luckily, since I had the walker, I was able to stop and rest every hundred yards or so.

We reached the viewpoint of the sunset. The scene was indeed spectacular! About 100 people were milling about, posing for photos and gawking at the canyon. Just after sunset, I thought we should start the long-ass trek back to the car. As I struggled up the incline, of course, other people passed me as if I was standing still.

For inspiration to continue the arduous climb, I gazed upon the strong, muscular thighs of a handsome hiker wearing some fairly short-shorts ahead of me. It was difficult to conceal my drool. By the time we neared the parking lot, it was completely dark, and we were reduced to using my breasticles to light the pathway.

That short 20-minute hike actually took us an hour and a half. I clearly understood why this place is named after a dead horse. Ever-so-excited to check into the hotel and relax my aching bones in the pool, I was devastated to learn that due to COVID concerns, the pool was closed. Damn!

The next day, we drove to the Grand Canyon. We bought tickets to have an air tour of the canyon in a small 8-seat single-engine plane. Now I have a fear of

heights, as well as vertigo, so I’m a little bit dizzy just standing on solid ground at the best of times. Consequently, I approached this excursion with much trepidation.

The extremely elderly pilot (not a confidence builder) quickly noted where the barf bags were, and we took off. The scenery was indeed beyond magnificent, but the plane ride was as turbulent as riding Space Mountain at Disneyland. I struggled, fearing that my breakfast might make an encore appearance. OH! MY! GAWD! After one huge bump, I envisioned a nightmarish scenario where the plane was about to crash, and they threw me from the plane to lighten the load.

When we touched down, I tried to kiss the earth, but my breasticles prevented my lips from touching the ground.

This story leaves us with several important questions: 1. Should I tap into an underserved market and develop a chain of drive-thru buffets named Petunia’s Beef Barn?

2. Should the Beef Barn be staffed with beefy hunks or drag queens?

3. Just how many horses have died at Dead Horse Point?

4. Should I install emergency rescue beacons on my breasticles for potential nighttime rescues?

5. How difficult would it be for me to put a parachute into my breasticles?

These and other eternal questions will be answered in future chapters of The Perils of Petunia Pap Smear. Q

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