CHURCH of SAINT MARY The First Sunday of Advent December 3, 2023
Reverend Father Robert A. Romeo | Pastor Reverend Father Dominik Wegiel | Parochial Vicar Reverend Father Rafal Borowiejski | Parochial Vicar Reverend Father Edward Obi, MSP | Parochial Vicar
1300 Northern Boulevard | Manhasset, New York 11030 516 627 0385 | Fax 516 627 6070 www.saintmarysmanhasset.org
Parish Mission Statement We, the community of Saint Mary’s, Manhasset, building on our rich heritage of Catholic faith and tradition, center ourselves in the Eucharist and honor God in proclaiming the Good News of Jesus Christ. Guided by the Holy Spirit, we seek to be the presence of Christ through our liturgical, educational and social ministries. We dedicate our time, talent and treasure to the service of all as we build the kingdom of God in our world. We commit to this mission in the name of Jesus Christ.
Church of Saint Mary 1300 Northern Boulevard Manhasset, New York 11030 (516) 627-0385 Fax (516) 627-6070 www.saintmarysmanhasset.org
Schedule of Masses Thursday 7:00 AM (when school is in session) Monday–Friday 9:00 AM Saturday 9:00 AM, 5:00 PM Sunday 7:30 AM, 9:00 AM, 10:30 AM, 12:00 Noon
PARISH DIRECTORY Pastoral Staff Rev. Fr. Robert A. Romeo Pastor 627-0385 | ext. 1004 pastor@stmary.ws Rev. Fr. Dominik Wegiel Parochial Vicar 627-0385 | ext. 1006 frdominik@stmary.ws Rev. Fr. Rafal Borowiejski Parochial Vicar
Sacrament of Penance
Rev. Fr. Edward Obi, MSP Parochial Vicar
Saturdays from 4:00-4:45 PM and by appointment. Please call 627-0385.
Parish Staff
Anointing of the Sick The Sacrament of the Anointing of the Sick is celebrated in the Chapel on the second Sunday of the month following the 10:30 AM Mass. If you are unable to come to Church, please call the Parish Office to make arrangements for Anointing or to receive the Eucharist.
Parish Office 627-0385 | Fax 627-6070 Monday 9:00 AM - 4:00 PM Tuesday - Friday 9:30 AM - 4:00 PM Saturday - (phone only) 10:00 AM–1:30 PM Sunday 9:30 AM - 2:00 PM E-mail: information@stmary.ws
Parish Social Ministry 365-2705 Monday-Wednesday-Thursday 11:00 AM-3:00 PM E-mail: socialmin@stmary.ws St. Vincent de Paul Society: svdp@stmary.ws
Religious Education 627-4028 Monday 12:00 Noon-8:00 PM Wednesday 9:00 AM–5:00 PM Tuesday and Thursday 9:00 AM–6:00 PM Closed on Friday
Jane Clifford Bulletin Editor bulletin@stmary.ws Marie T. Granieri Director of Religious Education 627-4028 | ext. 1127 releddirector@stmary.ws Vincent Hartley Facilities Manager 627-0385 | ext. 1002 Kathleen Kosciusko Director of Parish Social Ministry 627-0385 | ext. 1126 kkosciusko@stmary.ws Jennifer LaChance Office Manager 627-0385 information@stmary.ws Daniel Maimone Music Director 627-0385 | ext. 1021 dmaimone@saintmarysmanhasset.org Vanessa Quiros Parish Office 627-0385 vquiros@stmary.ws Sr. Teresa Raftery, IHM Adult Faith Formation 627-0385 | ext. 1010 traftery@stmary.ws
The Schools of Saint Mary Nursery through 12th Grade Very Rev. Dom Elias Carr, Can. Reg., Ph.D. President
627-2711 president@stmary.ws Norma Ragalli Stafford Director of Admissions 627-2711 | ext 1084 nstafford@stmary.ws Edward Short Vice President of Development 627-2711 | ext 1120 eshort@stmary.ws Eileen M. Symmons ’82, ’86 Director of Communications 627-2711 esymmons@stmary.ws Kiera Gmelich Walsh Director of Alumni and Parent Relations 627-2711 | ext. 1162 kwalsh@stmary.ws Sarah de Venoge Griffin ’02, ’06 Liaison for School Relations sgriffin@saintmarysmanhasset.org St. Mary’s Elementary School 627-0184 www.stmary11030.org Theresa A. Kemp Principal tkemp@stmary11030.org St. Mary’s High School 627-2711 www.saintmaryshs.org Gerard J. Buckley Principal gbuckley@saintmaryshs.org
From the Pastor’s Desk Dear Parishioners,
“Be watchful! Be alert! You do not know when the time will come.” (Mark 13: 33) As we begin the Advent Season, the Gospel challenges us to be watchful and alert for the coming of the Lord. The Season of Advent is like a stop sign on our journey of life. As we stop, we are called to reflect on what in our life, from the past year, has begun to clutter our minds and our hearts. Are there areas and issues in our lives that keep us from preparing a place for Jesus? The first thing to do is to recognize them and then seek the wisdom to eradicate them from our hearts. That, of course, will take work and, yes, even time. But if we don’t start then how can we ever finish that work within us? Sometimes, the answer to that peace we seek is simpler than we think. Fear of change or confronting ourselves may keep us from this journey, but what does the alternative do for our peace and relationship with the Lord? Start today, right now. The time certainly can go by quickly and, before you know it, Christmas has past. The time is now to celebrate the Advent Season and the wonderful call of the prophets. Advent is OUR holy time. For the world we are deep into the Christmas Season (actually it began before Halloween), but for us, as believers and the ones who wait for the Second Coming of Jesus, we are in a preparation period. While there are certainly preparations for Christmas that we must do, it will take more work and direction to keep our hearts focused on the goal of the Advent Season: preparing our hearts for the coming of the Lord. Be diligent; take the time each day to reflect on what God is calling you to, pray, and go to confession so that filled with that grace you may receive with even deeper joy the Body of Christ on Christmas Day. The Advent Wreath is the main symbol of the season. You will notice that the wreath has four (4) candles, representing the four weeks of Advent. Each week we will light a candle to remind us that the time of salvation draws near. Three of the candles are purple (the first, second and fourth week). Purple is the color of waiting, conversion, and hope. The third week, we light a pink or rose-colored candle. It is in the third week that we first hear in the Scriptures of the coming of the Messiah. The color of joy is white and when that is mixed with purple it creates pink. But even in that joy of hearing of the Messiah, we are reminded to continue to focus on our preparations and hence the fourth week is again a purple candle. Many families now have an Advent Wreath displayed in their homes and before dinner say prayers of blessing and light the candle. If you go online you can find prayers for each week’s blessings (see page 7 for the first week’s prayer). How wonderful a custom to be able to bring the symbols of the season into our homes! May Jesus, Our Messiah and Mary, Mother of the New Advent, bless you all. Fr. Bob
Solemnity of the Immaculate Conception of the Blessed Virgin Mary Friday, December 8th - A Holy Day of Obligation Masses December 7th - 5:00 PM December 8th - 9:00 AM, 7:00 PM The First Sunday of Advent | December 3, 2023
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Stewards of God’s Gifts In today’s Gospel, Jesus warns us to always be vigilant in our spiritual life. Living Stewardship ~ Pillar of Formation: This week, put Jesus’ warning into practice in your life. Make time to go to confession and prepare yourself for this Advent season.
The collection for Sunday, November 26, 2023 amounted to $25,415.00 The collection for Sunday, November 27, 2022 amounted to $26,584.00 The collection for Sunday, November 19, 2023 amounted to $23,426.00 The collection for Sunday, November 20, 2022 amounted to $23,282.00 The collection for the Campaign for Human Development amounted to $6,781.00 Have you enrolled yet? Visit www.faithdirect.net. Our parish code is NY281.
We Care for Our Parish Community Baptism We celebrate Baptism at 1:30 PM on the second Sunday of the month and at 12:30 PM on the fourth Saturday of the month as scheduled. Please call the Parish Office at least one month in advance to see if a date is available and to arrange to fill out pre-baptismal paperwork. New parents are required to attend a Baptism preparation session held once every month. Those chosen as sponsors for Baptism should lead lives in harmony with the Catholic faith and the role of Godparent.”
4:30-5:30 PM. Classes also meet on Sundays from 9:3010:20 AM for Grades 1 through 8 and on Mondays from 7:00-8:00 PM for Grades 6, 7 and 8. We also offer the option of an online home program for Grades 1 through 7. For information about Grades 1-8 call 627-4028 or email Mrs. Marie Granieri at releddirector@stmary.ws.
Parish Social Ministry We care for our sisters and brothers through our Parish Social Ministry and Food Pantry. For information call 365-2705.
Marriage Youth Ministry
At least six months before you plan to be married and before you make arrangements for the reception, please make an appointment with one of the priests to begin the necessary preparations.
We reach out to our teens though our Youth Ministry Program. For information email youth@stmary.ws or visit stmarysyouth.weebly.com.
Children’s Education
New Parishioners
Saint Mary’s Elementary School offers excellent education in the spirit of the Gospel from grades N, Pre-K to Eighth grade. For information call 627-0184.
We welcome new members to the Catholic Church and to Saint Mary’s Parish. If you are new in the area or interested in learning more about the Catholic faith, please call the Parish Office.
Empowering Character, Innovation and Leadership in our students, Saint Mary’s High School is a dynamic, contemporary, Catholic value-centered school, combining a commitment to academic excellence and educational innovation, with a passion for learning, and an emphasis on moral character development through the pursuit of truth and discovered in faith and reason. For information call 627-2711. The Religious Education Program provides excellent formation in the Catholic Faith for children in public or private schools. Preparation for First Holy Communion and Confirmation requires two years. Classes are held at St. Mary’s for Grades 1 through 5 on Tuesdays and Thursdays
Opportunities For Prayer The Church is open Monday to Friday until 8:45 PM, on Saturday until the end of the 5:00 PM Mass, and on Sunday until 6:00 PM so that we may have the opportunity for quiet prayer before the Blessed Sacrament. The Miraculous Medal Novena is said each Monday following the 9:00 AM Mass. Monday to Saturday the Rosary is said following the 9:00 AM Mass. Eucharistic Adoration is held every Monday from 3:00 to 5:00 PM in the Chapel. On First Saturdays, the Scriptural Rosary is recited following the 9:00 AM Mass.
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Masses and Special Intentions Ann Shields Ronald Grubert Jane Hone Anna Forte Mickey Kennedy Dr. Michael O’Grady Sarah Horsham Gladys Jean Theresa Fallon Nina Principe Douglas Martocci, Sr. Christine Marchese Cole Marguglio Katharine Whelan Maria DeAngelis Phil Quartararo Carol Furciato Donna Chesney Mason Erica Klock Tom Francess Jacob Rivera Gabriel Romeo Jaxson Rivera Helen Kennedy Names will remain on the list for three months. Please email bulletin@stmary.ws if you would like to continue with the listing. Clara Yuranich-Martini
Hilton, Nathaniel, SGT, USA Horner, Brian G., 1stLt, USMC Howard, Edward, PV2, USA Hussey, James M., GySgt, USMC Jones, Scott B., LT, USN Jones, Katherine L., LTJG, USN Kennedy, Michael, Col, USAF 125th Brigade Support Battalion LaManna, Vincent S., Jr., PVT, USA 23rd Marine Regiment Landolphi, Michael, ENS, USN 25th Marine Regiment Lanza, Anthony E., LtCol, USMC 2-4 GSAB Task Force Mustang Madden, Michael E., Major, USAF 2-211th GSAB Task Force Major, A. Edward, III, LTC, USA War Horse Marine Medium Tilt Rotor Squadron 161 51st Security Force Squadron Marine Transport Squadron 352 75th Ranger Regiment McGorry, Patrick F., HM2, USN 82nd Expeditionary Rescue Squadron McKievear, Gary, LT, USA Alacqua, Alexander, 1LT, USA Millau, Jeffrey, PFC, USMC Amerson, Jason, CPT, USA Morris, Jr., Brian J., MAC, USN Anderson, Michael, 1LT, USA O’Leary, Jason, SSgt, USAF Arnold, James, LCpl, USMC Petracca, Evan L., LTJG, USN Arnoux, Seraph, PFC, USA Quinn, Anthony, Jr., SGT, USA Avasthi, David, Capt, USAF Richardson, Timothy, PV2, USA Baber, Joseph, Maj, USAF Broderick, Evan, SGT, USA Radman, Paul Cpl, USMC Broderick, Steven, SN, USN Rodi, Caroline G., CAPT, USN Brodie, Virgina H., 2ndLt, USMC Saville, John A., ENS, USN Brown, Jason, SGT, USA Sharkey, John J., LtCol, USMC Collins, Matthew, LT, USN Spivak III, Edmund, Capt, USAF Fontanetta, Joseph, Maj, USMC Sweeney, Timothy, CPT, USA Hannan, Jack, ENS, USN Swersky, Roberto, Capt, USMC Tafone, Samantha, SGT, USA Hayes, Andrew, Capt, USMC Ullrich, Kenneth C., HN, USN Hellman, Thomas, 2d Lt, USSF Unger, Matthew J., SPC, USA Hernandez, Steven, SSgt, USAF Vachris, Madison, LTJG, USN Higgins, James, GySgt, USMC Wood, Kelly, BMSR, USN Hilton, Justin, SGT, USA If you have a service member that you would like to add to this list please e-mail bulletin@stmary.ws. Please include name, rank and branch of service.
Masses for the Week Monday, December 4th St. John Damascene, Priest & Doctor of the Church Is 2:1-5, Mt 8:5-11 9:00 AM | Carmine DiDonato Tuesday, December 5th Is 11:1-10, Lk 10:21-24 9:00 AM | Edith Arienti Wednesday, December 6th St. Nicholas, Bishop Is 25:6-10a, Mt 15:29-37 9:00 AM | George Krahm Thursday, December 7th St. Ambrose, Bishop & Doctor of the Church Is 26:1-6, Mt 7:21, 24-27 7:00 AM | Christopher Conroy 9:00 AM | Peter & Lisa Reali (living) 5:00 PM | Margaret Cirillo Friday, December 8th The Immaculate Conception of the Blessed Virgin Mary Gn 3:9-15, 20, Eph 1:3-6, 11-12, Lk 1:26-38 9:00 AM | Kenneth Brown 7:00 PM | Kelly Moulton Caesare Saturday, December 9th St. Juan Diego Cuauhtlatoatzin Is 30:19-21, 23-26, Mt 9:35-10:1, 5a, 6-8 9:00 AM | Christine Regan 5:00 PM | Vincenza & Salvatore Bonventre Thomas J. Flynn, Sr. Mary & Thomas O’Brien Joseph Labella Richard Edward Nabet Mary Agnes Newman & James J. Newman Patricia Donovan Sunday, December 10th The Second Sunday of Advent Is 40:1-5, 9-11, 2 Pt 3:8-14, Mk 1:1-8 7:30 AM | Richard Masterson 9:00 AM | People of the Parish 10:30 AM | Robert Levulis, Sr. 12:00 Noon | Jeanette Albanese Harold Schneck William Joseph Gilligan Lori LaRocca Leslie Ann Kempa Anette Marie Kempa John Leo O’Gorman
Cover: The Immaculate Conception of Los Venerables. Artist: Bartolomé Estaban Murillo (1617-1682.
The First Sunday of Advent | December 3, 2023
ST. MARY’S GIFT SHOP ANNUAL ADVENT SALE TODAY AFTER THE 9:00, 10:30 AM, & 12:00 NOON MASSES IN THE SOUTH VESTIBULE ADVENT BOOKS, CANDLES, & HOLDERS, CRAFTS FOR CHILDREN & MORE
Readings and Questions for Faith Sharing on the Second Sunday of Advent Reading I: Isaiah 40:1-5, 9-11 In the desert prepare the way of the Lord! Make straight in the wasteland a highway for our God!
Let the little children come to me... (Matt 19:14)
Children’s Liturgy of the Word Every Sunday at the 9:00 AM Mass
Bread & Wine are offered this week in loving memory of
Michael Connor Gabriel
Reading II: 2 Peter 3:8-14 Be eager to be found without spot or blemish before him, at peace. Gospel: Mark 1:1-8 Behold, I am sending my messenger ahead of you; he will prepare your way. Question for Adults: What mountains need to be made low and what valleys need to be filled in my life so that I can prepare the way for the Lord? Question for Children: Who are the messengers announcing God’s coming in my life?
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Respect Life Ministry Please Join St. Mary’s Respect Life Ministry as We Pray
One Thousand Hail Marys
for Peace in the Holy Land, in our country, and around the world
Saturday, December 9th Following the 9:00 AM Mass, until mid-afternoon, in the side Chapel Our Blessed Mother has promised that with prayer, there can be peace in the world. Please join us, if only for a few minutes!
Exposition and Adoration of the Blessed Sacrament Advent Prayer Lord Jesus, Master of both the light and the darkness, Send your Holy Spirit upon our preparations for Christmas. We who have so much to do and seek quiet spaces to hear your voice each day. We who are anxious over many things look forward to your coming among us. We who are blessed in so many ways long for the complete joy of your kingdom. We whose hearts are heavy seek the joy of your presence. We are your people, walking in darkness, yet seeking the light. To you we say, “Come Lord Jesus!” Amen
Prayer for Lighting the Advent Wreath Candles Exposition and Adoration of the Blessed Sacrament with Closing Benediction Mondays 3:00 - 5:00 PM
in the Church
First Week All-powerful God, increase our strength of will for doing good that Christ may find an eager welcome at his coming and call us to his side in the kingdom of heaven, where he lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit one God, forever and ever. Amen.
Rosary Society Our Mission Statement: The Rosary Society fosters devotion to Mary through prayer and good works for causes that would be dear to her heart Invest 20 minutes of your day to pray the Rosary, and see the difference it will make in your life. If you would like the Rosarians to pray for a special intention, please e-mail us at rosarysociety@stmary.ws.
CHRISTMAS DINNER UPDATE Our Annual Christmas dinner is just a few days away. If you missed the November 25th deadline and would like to attend, place your $105.00 check in the Rosary Society mailbox in the Parish Office AND NOTIFY either: Marijo Lantier at 917-496-5640 / Malantier510@gmail.com or Prinzipia Duggan at 516-526-0790 / pgd53@mac.com. We respectfully request all reservations be received no later than December 2nd. Seats will not be sold at the door. Thank you for your understanding.
LAST MEETING OF 2023 - FRIDAY, DECEMBER 15TH, AT 8:00 AM In an effort to include Rosarians who are unable to attend late morning meetings due to work schedules or other commitments, we will host an early morning meeting. The hope is to allow more people to attend our monthly meetings and connect more closely with fellow Rosarians.
Friday, December 8th - The Solemnity of the Immaculate Conception of the Blessed Virgin Mary The title given to Mary celebrates her conception, free from original sin. Pope Pius IX proclaimed the Immaculate Conception a dogma of the Church on December 8, 1854. “The Most Blessed Virgin Mary was, from the first moment of her conception, by a singular grace and privilege of Almighty God, and by virtue of the merits of Jesus Christ, Savior of the human race, preserved from all stain of original sin.” He cited Genesis 3:15 where God told the serpent, “ I will put enmity between you and the woman, between your seed and her seed.” Theologians believed that the angel Gabriel’s greeting in Luke 1:28, “Hail, full of grace,” meant that Mary was fully favored with an abundance of grace. God’s grace kept her free from original sin throughout her life. God chose her from the beginning to be the mother of Jesus and thus, made her worthy and without sin. - Illustrated Book of Mary. Blessed Virgin Mary, may we imitate your life of humble faith and service. Amen
Music Ministry ATTENTION! All 3rd through 8th Graders St. Mary’s Youth Choir Is BACK! WE NEED YOU!
Our Adult Choir Is Recruiting New Members High Schoolers and Up All Voice Parts
Rehearsals are on Wednesdays in the church 6:00 PM for the Youth Choir 7:30 PM for the Adult Choir Come join us as we prepare for Christmas! For more information, please email our Music Director, Daniel Maimone dmaimone@saintmarysmanhasset.org
ST. MARY’S ELEMENTARY SCHOOL PTO PRESENTS
EVENING W i t h SANTA URDAY DEC 9 TH T A S
6 - 9 pm p
IN WIEST GYM AFTER 5 PM MASS Buffet, Raffles, Crafts
ADULTS $40 CHILDREN $20 UNDER AGE 2 FREE
PLEASE REGISTER AT HTTPS://STMARY11030.ORG/ PRE-REGISTRATION IS RECOMMENDED
Fee at the door
Kindergarten
St. Mary’s celebrated our togetherness as a school family with much gratitude as our adorable kindergartners gathered for their Thanksgiving feast. From handmade crafts to joyous giggles during the festive banquet, our prayerful reflection focused on every moment in our lives being gifted as a treasure by God. Thank you to Mrs. Deriu, Mrs. Lamano, and Mrs. Tierney for planting the seed of learning every day with our Kindergarten his class and preparing them for this joyous occasion. We give special thanks to our e parents for blessing us with the precious gifts of their children in our school. Thank you for yourr time and talent, from set up to al in clean up and the delicious meal between so the Kindergarten class could enjoy this time together!
ST. MARY’S ELEMENTARY SCHOOL EARLY CHILDHOOD PROGRAM Registration for the St. Mary’s Early Childhood Program featuring Cherubs (2s), Nursery (3s), Pre-K (4s), and Kindergarten classes is now open for 2024!
Enroll by Jan. 1 for “Early Bird” Tuition Incentive
1340 Northern Blvd. Manhasset, NY 516-627-0184
TO LEARN MORE SCAN THE QR CODE OR VISIT SAINTMARYSES.ORG
Parish Social Ministry SHARE CHRISTMAS “Blessed is the one who considers the poor! In the day of trouble, the Lord delivers him.” Psalm 41:1 This is the 27th year that St. Mary’s Parish Social Ministry will be supporting local families who struggle to provide a traditional Christmas for their family members. Our support for these families, of course, includes providing food for them. But we also like to provide gifts for them and their children. Many of these families rarely have the disposable income to purchase special gifts for themselves or those they love. They are truly struggling every month just to make ends meet, some months they have more success than others. We are offering a couple of ways for our parishioners to help these families have a less stressful holiday if they choose to. Our office really appreciates donations in the form of gift cards. This allows us to shop for individuals around the holidays, tailoring their gifts to best meet their needs. Any leftover gift cards are used throughout the year to support these families with needed items. An example of when we would use a leftover gift card is around September for a single mom to buy shoes for her children before school. Suggestions for gift cards that would make wonderful gifts include:
Visa
Marshalls/TJ Maxx Raindew American Express
Amazon Macy’s Target
If you prefer to shop for gifts yourself, please fill out the form below, and we will send you a “Wish List” created by a specific family or a person in need. You may also email kkosciusko@stmary.ws to get on the “Share Christmas Shopper” list. Gifts and gift cards can be dropped off to our office Mondays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays from 11:00 AM to 3:00 PM. They can also be dropped at the Parish Office during normal business hours. Please label any donations with your name and “Share Christmas.” Please deliver all gifts by Thursday, December 14th. As always, your generosity and the spirit in which you give to those in need are so appreciated. We sincerely hope you and your family experience the beauty of God’s grace this holiday season. We hope you have much joy and peace and many beautiful moments. Name:
Telephone:
Address:
Email:
I would like #
Family Member(s) or
A Complete Family
I prefer to give gift cards and will deliver them to the Parish Social Ministry Office by Dec. 14
This week’s specific needs include:
Shampoo Toothpaste
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To register, return the form above to the Parish Social Ministry Office or scan the code below: nj
RCIA and Adult Faith Formation Get Ready for Christmas! Advent Prayer Group Will Meet on Tuesdays at 1:00 PM The Advent Prayer Group will meet on the following Tuesdays of Advent: December 5, 12, and 19 at 1:00 PM in the parish library. All are welcome to participate. Please contact Sr. Teresa with any questions or for more information. Sister Teresa can be contacted about our Adult Faith Formation programs at 516-627-0385, ext. 1010. Her office hours are Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday between 10:00 AM and 4:00 PM and other times by appointment.
Society of St. Vincent de Paul THE NEXT SVDP MEETING IS MONDAY, DECEMBER 4TH at 7:00 PM in the Saint John Paul II Room. New members are always welcome! We invite you to explore the St. Vincent de Paul Society of St. Mary’s Church. There are no special qualifications to join, other than the desire to join with others in helping Neighbors in need. As a group, we meet monthly. Come decide for yourself if God is calling you to p this special Ministry. As we begin Advent we are called to “Be watchful! Be alert” as we stand in joyful anticipation for the grace of Christmas to once again bless our lives. Your gift in the St. Vincent de Paul Poor Box will help the poor to celebrate the grace of God’s love this Christmas. Our St. Vincent de Paul Conference is able to help our neighbors in need through the generosity of our St. Mary’s parishioners. Each time you donate, either through the collection slots at the doors of the church, or in an envelope marked for St. Vincent de Paul, you are helping our neighbors within St. Mary’s Parish. If you or someone you know is in need of assistance, contact the St. Vincent de Paul Society at 516-627-0385, ext. 1125, or email SVDP@stmary.ws. To donate furniture, clothing or household items, please call the store in Garden City Park at 516-746-8250. Thank you for your continued support.
Parish Social Ministry The Advent Giving Tree is in the south vestibule of the church and if parishioners would like to participate in giving to local families in need, they can take an ornament off the tree. Donations, unwrapped or in gift bags with the ornament attached, can be dropped off in the Parish Office or the Parish Social Ministry office during normal business hours. The deadline is December 16th (gift cards by December 14th). May God bless you for your continued generosity and support. Have a blessed Christmas.
Gifts from Bethlehem Olivewood Handcrafted from the Holy Land Next Weekend December 9th - 10th after all Masses in the Marian Room
THE CHURCH OF ST. MARY, MANHASSET HISTORY ARCHIVES PROJECT
YOUR HELP IS NEEDED! At Fr. Bob’s direction, a new project has begun to update and add to the history of the parish of St. Mary, Manhasset. ALL PARISHIONERS are asked to support this endeavor, as we search for documents, photos, and other items related to events during the past 170 years of St. Mary. If you have any of the following from any event, ministry, or of any of the Schools of St. Mary’s, sharing these would be greatly appreciated:
Second Collection Next Weekend You can help. “Religious are blessed to serve,” says Dominican Father Bertrand Ebben, age 90. Please donate to the Retirement Fund for Religious next week. Your gift will provide essential care for nearly 25,000 senior sisters, brothers and religious order priests who have dedicated their lives to serving others. Let us show our gratitude to these selfless individuals by giving generously. Photo: Jim Judkis. ©2023 United States Conference of Catholic Bishops. Used with permission.
Business Owners: Please consider advertising in our bulletin. It’s a great way to support our parish. Call our printer, LPi at 1-800-477-4574 or visit their website www.4lpi.com for more information. We are in region 03.
Please Patronize Our Advertisers
Photos Journals, Programs Announcements Newspaper articles Family remembrances Information regarding: The Elementary and High School (s) Past pastors, priests, nuns, school principals Clergy & Religious who were parish residents Knights of Columbus, Rosary Society, and other ministries Celebrations, graduations, sacraments, galas, etc. Any and all of these would be very helpful. PLEASE NOTE: Any article of information which you wish to be returned can be “digitized” (scanned) and saved, then returned to you. Please include this request with your item with the contact information for its return to you. There will be a box placed in the Parish Office to receive these valuable pieces of our parish’s history. We appreciate any aid as we look forward to the Centennial of the Elementary School (in 2026) and the Parish’s 175th Anniversary (in 2028). For more information, please contact either Mary Lou de Venoge 516-993-2706 doggonelab@msn.com or Marijo Lantier 917-496-5640 MALantier510@gmail.com
Religious Education Dear St. Mary’s Family, In joyful preparation for Advent, students are studying the lives of great biblical people who underwent life changing tests of faith. As the world around them is filled with uncertainty, they persevere to keep placing all trust in God. Our first grade students now understand how Noah and Abraham were able to live through great challenges by keeping their eyes and hearts centered on God. Second grade students adorned Jesus with a beautiful ornament capturing the humility of the nativity. We are so grateful for the foundational Catholic teaching shared through St. Mary’s Catechists! Across all grades, St. Mary’s Religious Education students always demonstrate their commitment to Christ when called to give. Thank you to all families who so generously participated in the parish food drive. The least of our brothers and sisters truly welcomed your kindness at their family table. Advent Blessings, Mrs. Granieri
Congratulations to Alexander Jorge on receiving First Eucharist. May God bless you with everlasting joy!
In Session with Dr. Patricia Pitta Making Healthier Interactions: With Family Members “Anxiety in the heart of man causes depression, but a good word makes it glad.” (Proverbs 12:25) The Christmas season is upon us with full intensity. It appears that many people who could not visit due to COVID may be available this season. Considering what has happened and what is presently happening in our world, the levels of anxiety and stress are at all time heights. When the atmosphere is so complicated and unsure, people’s emotions and moods are challenged. Even the gentlest person might be tested in terms of reactions to people they haven’t seen for a time or the anticipation of being together can add to one’s anxiety. If there are old hurts and pain left behind from the past, but never discussed or worked through, they might appear when put back in contact with each other. Did you know that within less than twenty minutes of being together and, for some much shorter, each of us fall into the roles that are familiar within the nuclear or extended family system? The nuclear family is the family you were born into. Put the sibs and parents together and before you know it, allegiances are re-established, and old behaviors appear. The same is true for extended family interactions. Wow!! Some say they feel like they are a kid again in those situations, and to top it off, they act like kids. So how do you keep the interactions healthier whereby you manage your emotions to stay in control of yourself and your reactions? Remember: We cannot control others, particularly other adult reactions. If we are parents and we see our child reacting in
a manner that is dysregulated, we can help them learn to self-regulate by providing corrective emotional experiences. With our adult sibs, parents and relatives, we cannot do that. If we do, we will get reactions that are for sure not regulated. So, your brother or sister, or annoying aunt or uncle is coming to your house for the holiday. How do you take care of yourself and create an environment of healthier interactions? Before the event: Pray to the Holy Spirit for enlightenment to interact in the healthiest way you can (see prayers below). I like the saying: “Be the adult in the room.” So, what does that mean? It means to prepare yourself emotionally for the gathering. Have realistic expectations of other’s behaviors. It is going to be more of the same, but what is different is how you react. Do you have that competitive relative that is trying to show that he/she is special in some way? Listen to what the person says, validate that he or she is special, but not at your expense. If he/she tends to put you down to feel important, you can say, “I don’t agree with you, and you are entitled to your opinion.” If someone asks you a question that you feel is too personal saying “I do not wish to discuss this” is just fine. Drawing boundaries that make you feel comfortable is appropriate. If someone wants to act inappropriately: Draw a boundary that makes you feel safe. Another tactic is to change the subject if you need to continue contact or walk away and take a deep breath as you honor your position and peace. Calm your mind and body through prayer and guidance of the Holy Spirit. If the interaction is just too intense, you can say, “I give this to God” and say, “Peace be with you.” Church of Saint Mary | 16
As soon as you catch your breath, partake in a neutral experience. Partake in another activity. You can interact with different people at the gathering. Play a game and include the children. The innocence of a child is a great normalizer. Leave and take a five-to-ten-minute break. Go for a walk, go to the bathroom, and take a deep breath and say a prayer. What you are doing is reducing toxicity and turning toxicity to productivity for yourself. Sing a song in your head. This helps calm the parts of your brain that are on high alert. Then you can look at the situation from a more emotionally regulated manner. You might be able to see the repetition of old dysfunctional behaviors on the part of the relative and look at the situation with a knowing and peaceful manner and with the love of God. As a result, you can look away, set boundaries, change the subject, or confront the behavior in a healthy manner. A good activity is when sitting at the dinner table ask each person to say something positive. The point is to change a negative focus to a positive one. There might be people who don’t want to participate, just continue to the next person. If there are children at the table, have a form of reinforcement (a candy, small toy) that they can earn as they say something positive. It is difficult for adults to interfere in a child’s joy. Don’t let anyone highjack your joy and the celebration of the goodness of the day and the season. Politics has been a topic that has divided many people. Don’t discuss politics especially if you know people are on the other side of the aisle. The goal of the day is to enjoy that which you have in common with your relatives. Maybe talk about a relative that was or is a positive influence in your family. The goal is to be positive and kind.
Dr. Patricia Pitta (con’t.) Also, the war and conflicts are quite distressing for all. Maybe take a break from discussing this topic. If exploring these events is positive for some, set aside a part of the room or house where people can discuss such topics. Also protect your children from conversations that are too distressing. Before the gathering, plan with a family member who can act as a buffer and distractor if the conversation gets too heated or someone’s behavior gets out of line. Discuss this with your partner or family member before the dinner and prepare how to deal with negative interactions. If you are prewarned, you will be armed with support and able to react not in a way to escalate or feed into a negative situation. The goal is to get through the day, with positive feelings about yourself and your interactions. We can change only ourselves and the way we react. You will feel stronger and have a greater sense of selfrespect if you follow these suggestions. When feeling emotionally intense, say a prayer to the Holy Spirit to guide you to feel calm and have peace within and with others. Enjoy your holiday gatherings. Merry Christmas from the Mental Health Ministry. Below is a prayer you may say alone or with others. My Dear Lord, send the Holy Spirit to inform me and teach me about your goodness and love for all. May I share these gifts with my family and friends gathered here today as we break bread together and give thanks for all that you have enabled me to do. Please give me the strength to continue to live in the healthiest manner possible and help each of us to become the best we can be in your name. Amen. Dr. Pitta is a Clinical and Family Psychologist practicing in Manhasset and is the chair of the Mental Health Ministry of St. Mary’s. She is the former Director of the Integrative Couple and Family Therapy Post-Graduate Program of psychology at St. John’s University. Dr. Pitta is a graduate of the Pastoral Formation Institute of Rockville Centre. She is the author of Solving Modern Family Dilemmas: An Assimilative Therapy Model published by Routledge Publishers, and Integrative Couple and Family Therapy published by the American Psychological Association.
NOVEMBER 2023 ST. MARY’S WELCOMES Those who registered in our parish: Ms. Janelle Richardson and Family Mr. & Mrs. Erasmo Troia and Family Mr. Anthony Zanolla & Ms. Rosanna Migliaccio
Those who were baptized: Olivia Taylor Minnich Riley Ava Donoghue Serafina Loredana Donaghy Lola Alec Brown Lorelei Madison Masiar Isabella Jo Galluccio Colby Rose Hufton Declan William McCarthy Elizabeth Jane Carey Michael Gabriel Reali Margaret Ann Giuggio
Those who were enrolled* in our Purgatorial Society: Mary Simone David Patrick Winchester Martin Gately Josephine Arkwright *enrollment begins December 1, 2023
Worldwide Marriage Encounter sponsors a variety of in-person and virtual marriage experiences, some on weekends and some on seven weekdays. Couples explore their relationship with each other, God, and the Church. Registration is limited; there is a $100 application fee. For more information or to apply, call Kevin & Regina Hickson at 516-554-3835 or https://wwmenyli.org/. The next local date available is February 9-11, 2024 in Huntington, NY.
Knights of Columbus Father William A. Daly S.J. Council #2122 Serving St. Mary’s Parish in Manhasset and St. Aloysius Parish In Great Neck www.kofc2122.org
What is a Knights of Columbus Family? We are Catholic families building a bridge to our faith. Our lives, time, efforts, and resources are dedicated to these values: Charity. Unity. Fraternity. Patriotism. We come from different places, backgrounds, and all stages of life. But the common thread is our Catholic faith. We are Catholic families seeking to improve ourselves and the world. It’s one thing to say who you are. It’s another thing is to live it. Put your values into practice. Become a Knights of Columbus family. Interested? Please call: Tony Racioppo 917 539 0859 Dan Garcia 516 358 1817 Ladies interested in joining the Columbiettes Please contact Maura Clifford at Macliff56@gmail.com