Church of Saint Mary Parish Bulletin: October 20, 2024
Parish Mission Statement
We, the community of Saint Mary’s, Manhasset, building on our rich heritage of Catholic faith and tradition, center ourselves in the Eucharist and honor God in proclaiming the Good News of Jesus Christ.
Guided by the Holy Spirit, we seek to be the presence of Christ through our liturgical, educational and social ministries. We dedicate our time, talent and treasure to the service of all as we build the kingdom of God in our world. We commit to this mission in the name of Jesus Christ.
Church of Saint Mary
1300 Northern Boulevard
Manhasset, New York 11030 (516) 627-0385
Fax (516) 627-6070
www.saintmarysmanhasset.org
Schedule of Masses
Tursday 7:00 AM (when school is in session)
Monday–Friday 9:00 AM
Saturday 9:00 AM, 5:00 PM
Sunday 7:30 AM, 9:00 AM, 10:30 AM, 12:00 Noon
Sacrament of Penance
Saturdays from 4:00-4:45 PM and by appointment. Please call 627-0385.
Anointing of the Sick
Te Sacrament of the Anointing of the Sick is celebrated in the Chapel on the second Sunday of the month following the 10:30 AM Mass. If you are unable to come to Church, please call the Parish Ofce to make arrangements for Anointing or to receive the Eucharist.
Parish Ofce
627-0385 | Fax 627-6070
Monday 9:00 AM - 4:00 PM
Tuesday - Friday 9:30 AM - 4:00 PM
Saturday - (phone only) 10:00 AM–1:30 PM
Sunday 9:30 AM - 2:00 PM
E-mail: information@stmary.ws
Good Samaritan House
365-2705
Monday-Wednesday-Tursday 11:00 AM-3:00 PM
E-mail: kkosciusko@stmary.ws
St. Vincent de Paul Society: svdp@stmary.ws
Religious Education
627-4028
Monday 12:00 Noon-8:00 PM
Wednesday 9:00 AM–5:00 PM
Tuesday and Tursday 9:00 AM–6:00 PM
Closed on Friday
PARISH DIRECTORY
Pastoral Staf
Rev. Fr. Robert A. Romeo Pastor 627-0385 | ext. 1004 pastor@stmary.ws
Te Schools of Saint Mary Nursery through 12th Grade
Very Rev. Dom Daniel Nash, Can. Reg. President 627-2711 president@stmary.ws
Norma Ragalli Staford Director of Admissions 627-2711 | ext 1084 nstaford@stmary.ws
Eileen M. Symmons ’82, ’86 Director of Communications 627-2711 esymmons@stmary.ws
Kiera Gmelich Walsh Director of Alumni and Parent Relations 627-2711 | ext. 1162 kwalsh@stmary.ws
Sarah de Venoge Grifn ’02, ’06 Liaison for School Relations sgrifn@saintmarysmanhasset.org
St. Mary’s Elementary School 627-0184 www.stmary11030.org
Teresa A. Kemp Principal tkemp@stmary11030.org
St. Mary’s High School 627-2711 www.saintmaryshs.org
Gerard J. Buckley Principal gbuckley@saintmaryshs.org
Dear Parishioners,
“Whoever wishes to be great, will be the servant of all.” (Mark 10:44)
James and John, the sons of Zebedee, come to Jesus requesting privileged positions reserved for the great ones since what they expect Jesus to have is political authority and earthly glory. Jesus corrects their way of thinking. Te other ten become indignant of James and John, perhaps because they are also aspiring for the same privileged positions. Now, if each one of them were thinking that way, they would surely see one another as competitors rather than as members of the community of disciples who must collaborate with God’s Kingdom. Jesus corrects them by explaining that anyone aspiring to be great must serve. Service is the key to true greatness. He teaches this lesson to them, not only through explanation, but by his very example.
We have been taught to always want to be the best, to be the number one in all things. We were told and oriented to be always on top of everything. We aspire for the best position, the best place; for we thought that when we have the best, that is our fnal fulfllment and end of what we aspire to.
Haven’t we thought and believed that being “the best” is all that counts. We are driven to perform and deliver what is expected from us. We push and pull people and things just to attain our aim and goal.
Most of us become competitive in almost all aspects in life—in family life, academic life, professional life, social life, and even in spiritual life. We want to be the best and, in return, we get due and proper recognition from people around us and we get the place or rank that we want.
Is it incorrect to dream big and aspire to be famous? Is it wrong to aim for the best? Is it wrong to strive to do what we can and achieve good results and being recognized in return? No, it is encouraged to give one’s best and do one’s best in whatever we do. What makes it problematic is when one is driven to work for the best only for his/her selfinterest and gratifcation. When one fnds his/her way on top at the expense of others, something is not right. A motivation of self-centered intention and maliciousness leads us to sin.
In the Gospel, Jesus described and explained who is the real master. Jesus identifed and defned who is the greatest of all, who is the leader of all: he who is willing to be the last of all and servant of all and not the seeker of positions and places of power that will determine who you are.
Jesus’ concept of greatness is, of course, service and humility. To serve others and not one’s self, to be the last so that others may be served frst. We know our love of God is inseparable from our love of neighbor. To serve humanity and the entire creation is not only great but the greatest. To be the frst is to be the last of all and servant of all, in this way, one achieves greatness. Isn’t this the way our Savior lived and died?
Let us always be mindful of our intentions when we pursue, perform, and accomplish anything in life—be it a short plan or a strategic project. We only become great when the intention is pure and real, to love God and neighbor, to serve God and neighbor.
Te month of October is the month of the Most Holy Rosary. I encourage you, especially as a family, to pray the Rosary.
In Jesus and Mary, Fr. Bob
J Stewards of God’s Gifts
In today’s Gospel, Jesus tells us to serve others and be like Him.
Living Stewardship ~ Pillar of Service: We are called to serve the Lord and others. When we serve others, we also serve the Lord. Do something this week to put yourself at the service of others. Perhaps visit a friend or family member in the hospital or nursing home. Perhaps volunteer your time at a food pantry.
Te collection for Sunday, October 13, 2024 amounted to $23,254.00.
Te collection for Sunday, October 15, 2023 amounted to $22,413.00.
Te collection for Hurricane Relief amounted to $8,405.00.
Have you enrolled yet? Visit www.faithdirect.net. Our parish code is NY281.
We Care for Our Parish Community
Baptism
We celebrate Baptism at 1:30 PM on the second Sunday of the month and at 12:30 PM on the fourth Saturday of the month as scheduled. Please call the Parish Ofce at least one month in advance to see if a date is available and to arrange to fll out pre-baptismal paperwork. New parents are required to attend a Baptism preparation session held once every month. Tose chosen as sponsors for Baptism should lead lives in harmony with the Catholic faith and the role of Godparent.”
Marriage
At least six months before you plan to be married and before you make arrangements for the reception, please make an appointment with one of the priests to begin the necessary preparations.
Children’s Education
Saint Mary’s Elementary School ofers excellent education in the spirit of the Gospel from grades N, Pre-K to Eighth grade. For information call 627-0184.
Empowering Character, Innovation and Leadership in our students, Saint Mary’s High School is a dynamic, contemporary, Catholic value-centered school, combining a commitment to academic excellence and educational innovation, with a passion for learning, and an emphasis on moral character development through the pursuit of truth and discovered in faith and reason. For information call 627-2711.
The Religious Education Program provides excellent formation in the Catholic Faith for children in public or private schools. Preparation for First Holy Communion and Confrmation requires two years. Classes are held at St. Mary’s for Grades 1 through 5 on Tuesdays and Tursdays
4:30-5:30 PM. Classes also meet on Sundays from 9:3010:20 AM for Grades 1 through 8 and on Mondays from 7:00-8:00 PM for Grades 6, 7 and 8. We also ofer the option of an online home program for Grades 1 through 7. For information about Grades 1-8 call 627-4028 or email Mrs. Marie Granieri at releddirector@stmary.ws.
Parish Social Ministry
We care for our sisters and brothers through our Parish Social Ministry and Food Pantry. For information call 365-2705.
Respect Life Ministry
We strive to help build a civilization of love and life that upholds the dignity and inviolability of all innocent human life, seeks objective moral Truth, embraces the value of redemptive sufering, and yearns for the fullness of life in eternal communion with God the Creator. For more information, email RespectLife@StMary.ws.
New Parishioners
We welcome new members to the Catholic Church and to Saint Mary’s Parish. If you are new in the area or interested in learning more about the Catholic faith, please call the Parish Ofce.
Opportunities For Prayer
Te Church is open Monday to Friday until 8:45 PM, on Saturday until the end of the 5:00 PM Mass, and on Sunday until 6:00 PM. Te Miraculous Medal Novena is said each Monday following the 9:00 AM Mass. Monday to Saturday the Rosary is said following the 9:00 AM Mass. Eucharistic Adoration is held every Monday from 3:00 to 5:00 PM in the Chapel. On First Saturdays, the Scriptural Rosary is recited following the 9:00 AM Mass.
Church of Saint Mary | 4
)
Masses and Special Intentions
Maria DeAngelis
Donna Chesney
Erica Klock
Mason
Gabriel & Frances Romeo
Ann Shields
Mickey Kennedy
Nina Principe
Cole Marguglio
Sandy Pittman
Richard & Mary Atkinson
Anthony Polizzi
Kathy Dellis-Stover
Neil Gillis
Nicolas Inglese
Paul Inglese
Pamela Gallo
Allison Azzara
Teddy Connolly
Sarah Praay
Agnes Gaus
Glenn LaChance
Mary Jo Beagen
Christine Marchese
Names will remain on the list for three months. Please email bulletin@stmary.ws if you would like to continue with the listing
Georg Maichin
Robert A. Gull, Jr.
125th Brigade Support Battalion
23rd Marine Regiment
25th Marine Regiment
2-4 GSAB Task Force Mustang
2-211th GSAB Task Force War Horse
51st Security Force Squadron
75th Ranger Regiment
82nd Expeditionary Rescue Squadron
Alacqua, Alexander, CPT, USA
Amerson, Jason, CPT, USA
Anderson, Michael, 1LT, USA
Arnold, James, LCpl, USMC
Arnoux, Seraph, PFC, USA
Avasthi, David, Capt, USAF
Baber, Joseph, Maj, USAF
Blake, Julia, Cadet, USN
Broderick, Evan, SGT, USA
Broderick, Steven, SN, USN
Brodie, Virgina H., 2ndLt, USMC Brown, Jason, SGT, USA
Casazza, Jack, 2nd Lt, USMC
Collins, Matthew, LT, USN
Fontanetta, Joseph, Maj, USMC
Grubert, Sean, LCpl, USMC
Hannan, Jack, ENS, USN
Hayes, Andrew, Ca1837-1890pt, US MC
Hellman, Tomas, 2d Lt, USSF
Hernandez, Steven, SSgt, USAF
Higgins, James, GySgt, USMC
Hilton, Justin, SGT, USA
Hilton, Nathaniel, SGT, USA
Horner, Brian G., 1stLt, USMC
Howard, Edward M., GySgt, USMC
Jones, Scott B., LT, USN
Jones, Katherine L., LTJG, USN
Kennedy, Michael, Col, USAF
LaManna, Vincent S., Jr., PVT, USA
Landolphi, Michael, ENS, USN
Lanza, Anthony E., LtCol, USMC
Madden, Michael E., Major, USAF
Major, A. Edward, III, LTC, USA
Marine Medium Tilt Rotor Squadron 161
Marine Transport Squadron 352
McGorry, Patrick F., HM2, USN
McKievear, Gary, LT, USA
Millau, Jefrey, PFC, USMC
Morris, Jr., Brian J., ENS, USN
O’Leary, Jason, SSgt, USAF
Petracca, Evan L., LTJG, USN
Quinn, Anthony, Jr., SGT, USA
Richardson, Timothy, PV2, USA
Radman, Paul Cpl, USMC
Rodi, Caroline G., CAPT, USN
Saville, John A., ENS, USN
Sharkey, John J., LtCol, USMC
Spivak III, Edmund, Capt, USAF
Sweeney, Timothy, CPT, USA
Swersky, Roberto, Capt, USMC
Tafone, Samantha, SGT, USA
Ullrich, Kenneth C., HN, USN
Unger, Matthew J., SPC, USA
Vachris, Madison, LT, USN
Wood, Kelly, BMSR, USN
If you have a service member that you would like to add to this list please e-mail bulletin@stmary.ws. Please include name, rank and branch of service.
Masses for the Week
Monday, October 21st
Eph 2:1-10, Lk 12:13-21
9:00 AM | Joseph Gribbon
Tuesday, October 22nd
St. John Paul II, Pope
Eph 2:12-22, Lk 12:35-38
9:00 AM | Francis Gaudioso
Wednesday, October 23rd
St. John of Capistrano, Priest
Eph 3:2-12, Lk 12:39-48
9:00 AM | Pete Iconis
Tursday, October 24th
St. Anthony Mary Claret, Bishop
Eph 3:14-21, Lk 12:49-53
7:00 AM | Joseph Lovas ’62
9:00 AM | Francis Gaudioso
Friday, October 25th
Eph 4:1-6, Lk 12:54-59
9:00 AM | Michelina Felici and Family
Saturday, October 26th
Eph 4:7-16, Lk 13:1-9
9:00 AM | Louise Volpe
5:00 PM | Tomas J. Flynn, Sr.
Ettore Soregaroli
Sheri Ralph
Carmelo & Concetta Cataudella
Cecilia Ugbut
Tyler Godfrey
John Geoghegan
Sunday, October 27th
Te Tirtieth Sunday in Ordinary Time
Jer 31:7-9, Heb 5:1-6, Mk 10:46-52
7:30 AM | People of the Parish
9:00 AM | Pedro Guevara
10:30 AM | James J. Harford
12:00 Noon | Ellen Connell
Donald Dunphy
Mary Labiak
John McCann
John Dazzo
Stephanie Paterek
Clare Carney
Cover Art: Jesus Serving His Disciples. Artist: courtesy of LPi.
The Gift Shop IS OPEN on SUNDAYS
The hours are after the 9:00 AM, 10:30 AM, & 12:00 Noon Masses. It is located in the Parish Ministry Center below the church.
Any inquiries, please call 526-627-0385 ext. 1033
2024 Christmas Eve/Day Intentions will open on Tuesday, October 22nd
For more information, please contact the Parish Office at 516-627-0385
Readings and Questions for Faith Sharing on the Tirtieth Sunday in Ordinary Time
Reading I: Jeremiah 31:7-9
Te Lord has delivered his people, the remnant of Israel.
Reading II: Hebrews 5:1-6
It was not Christ who glorifed himself in becoming high priest, but rather the one who said to him: You are my son; this day I have begotten you.
Gospel: Mark 10:46-52 “What do you want me to do for you?”
Bread & Wine are ofered this week in loving memory of Kaye and Bruce Byrne
Question for Adults: Where in my life do I lack the ability to see? How would I like Christ to help me to see?
Question for Children:
How am I answering Jesus’ call to “get up” and follow Him?
Good Samaritan House
DRIVE-THROUGH HOLIDAY FOOD DROP
MONDAY, NOVEMBER 11TH
4:00 - 7:00 PM
IN THE PARKING LOT BEHIND THE CHURCH
God’s people of all ages are sufering in poverty right here in our neighborhood. Tey need food assistance all through the year but especially during the holiday season. Good Samaritan House is hosting a “drivethrough holiday food drop” with the goal of collecting the freshest possible food items to allow our neighbors sufering in poverty to enjoy a true feast with their families on Tanksgiving. We will be hosting this drivethrough collection on Monday, November 11th from 4:00 PM - 700 PM. Tis drive through collection will take place in the parking lot behind the church. (You may also drop the items by our ofce on Monday, Wednesday, and Tursday from 11:00 AM – 3:00 PM the week of November 11th.)
Frozen Oven Stuffer Chickens*
Frozen Turkeys (10-15 lbs. max)
3-8 Pound Bags of Potatoes
Crescent Rolls or Biscuit Tubes
Frozen Pies, Cakes, Cookies
Cake, Muffin, or Brownie Mix
Fresh Apples
Fresh Oranges
Frozen Pounds of Butter
Cans of Corn
Cans of Beans
Cans of Mixed Vegetables
Fresh Bags of Carrots
Quarts of Milk (no gallons)
*Stuffer chickens are preferred by some clients due to their size. No stuffing, gravy, canned yams, or cranberry sauce, please!
Unfortunately, for these families this holiday meal is only that - a one day meal. While we hope it will be very enjoyable for them, they still need food assistance throughout the rest of the month and into next year. Te St. Mary’s community does a wonderful job of supporting these families, but we are asking for a little extra at this difcult time. If you are able to provide grocery store gift cards to Good Samaritan House, they would be put to good use providing much needed food to these families during the holidays and into next year. In addition to grocery store gift cards, we provide non-perishable food items to all our families throughout the year. Please consider donating any non-perishable food you can. We are always in need and nothing goes to waste. Thank you in advance for your continued generosity and may God bless you and your family over this holiday season and in 2025.
Standard Pantry Non-Perishables: Cereal, Oatmeal, Soup, Tuna Fish, Beans, Baked Beans, Chef Boyardee, Pancake Mix, Syrup, Chili/Stew, Peanut Better, Jelly, Pasta, Jarred Pasta Sauce, Mac and Cheese, Instant Potatoes, Small Bags of Rice, Cake Mix, Jell-O, Crackers, Snacks, Canned Fruit, Juice, Instant Coffee, Tea. This week’s specific needs include: Juice, Snacks, Canned: (Peas, Carrots, Mixed Vegetables), Cake Mix
May every person’s life be protected and cared for from conception to natural death.
Our Father, 3 Hail Marys, Glory Be
God has loved you from all eternity and longs for a close relationship with you. In Scripture, He says, “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you” (Jer. 1:5). God has made you in His image and likeness, allowing you to share in and reflect His own glory. You were chosen by God, created out of love and for love. Your life is sacred, unique, irreplaceable, and good. And this reality is true for every human person. Each time we encounter another, we are standing on holy ground.
Human life is sacred at every moment and in every circumstance. The vulnerability of new life, the frailties of old age, and the challenges we face in between never diminish our God-given dignity. The life each of us has been given is always worth living. It is a gift that we are called to cherish and protect because God has willed us to exist through His love. And the same is true for the lives of others. Understanding our own goodness and dignity helps us see the sacredness of every human person. In response, we are called to treat each person accordingly to welcome, care for, protect, and defend the gift of every person’s life from its very beginning to its natural end.
• Fast from one meal today.
• Pray the Rosary (or a decade) for today’s intention (usccb.org/how-to-pray-the-rosary).
• Offer some other sacrifice, prayer, or act of penance that you feel called to do for today’s intention.
In 1995, Pope St. John Paul II wrote Evangelium vitae (The Gospel of Life). This prophetic encyclical reaffirmed the value and inviolability of human life and urged all people to respect, protect, love, and serve every human life. Learn more about the essential teachings of this profound document in, “The Gospel of Life: A Brief Summary” (respectlife.org/gospel-of-life-summary ).
Our Mission Statement: Te Rosary Society fosters devotion to Mary through prayer and good works for causes that would be dear to her heart
If you would like the Rosarians to pray for a special intention, please e-mail us at rosarysociety@stmary.ws. Invest 20 minutes of your day to pray the Rosary, and see the diference it will make in your life.
A Musical Rosary Sunday, October 27th at 1:00 PM in the Church
Next Rosary Society Meeting Wednesday, November 6th, at 6:15 PM to be followed by Movie Night
Details to follow
Respect Life Ministry
Presented by our Music Ministry and others
All are invited to attend
Join thousands of Catholics across the country praying the Respect Life Month Novena, October 22-30, for the protection of human life from conception to natural death! Each day of the novena features a different prayer intention, as well as a short reflection, ideas for building a culture of life, and more. Day 1 of the novena is shown on the opposite page. Visit https://www.respectlife.org/ to download the novena or sign up to get the daily prayers by email or text message.
Confidential, compassionate post-abortion help is available. Do not lose hope! Visit: drvcLife.org/ProjectRachel
Society of St. Vincent de Paul
In the Gospel today Jesus tells his disciples: “Anyone among you who aspires to greatness must serve the rest; whoever wants to rank frst among you must serve the needs of all.” When you give the furniture, household items and clothing you no longer use to the Society of St. Vincent de Paul, you give hope to your neighbors who have nothing.
Our St. Vincent de Paul Conference is able to help our neighbors in need through the generosity of our St. Mary’s parishioners. Each time you donate, either through the collection slots at the doors of the church, or in an envelope marked for St. Vincent de Paul, you are helping our neighbors within St. Mary’s Parish. If you or someone you know is in need of assistance, contact the St. Vincent de Paul Society at 516-627-0385, ext. 1125, or email SVDP@stmary.ws. To donate furniture, clothing or household items, please call the store in Garden City Park at 516-746-8250. Tank you for your continued support.
Sr. Teresa is most grateful for the brunch that was held on October 3rd in her honor on the occasion of her retirement from her position as the Director of Adult Faith Formation and RCIA at St. Mary’s. Te brunch was hosted by the daily lectors for the weekday daily community that attends 9:00 AM Mass. Te Marian Room was beautifully decorated and the breakfast foods that were contributed by those attending were delicious. Sister Teresa also received gifts from individual members of the group. She spoke briefy of her gratitude and love for St. Mary’s Parish because of the beautiful spirit, love, and faith of the people. Sr. Teresa will continue to reside in the convent and remains active in the parish as a lector and member of the Rosary Society.
Knights of Columbus
Father William A. Daly S.J. Council #2122
Serving St. Mary’s Parish in Manhasset and St. Aloysius Parish In Great Neck www.kofc2122.org
What is a Knights of Columbus Family?
We are Catholic families building a bridge to our faith.
Our lives, time, eforts, and resources are dedicated to these values: Charity. Unity. Fraternity. Patriotism.
We come from diferent places, backgrounds, and all stages of life. But the common thread is our Catholic faith. We are Catholic families seeking to improve ourselves and the world. It’s one thing to say who you are. It’s another thing is to live it. Put your values into practice. Become a Knights of Columbus family.
Interested? Please call: Tony Racioppo 917 539 0859
Dan Garcia 516 358 1817
Ladies interested in joining the Columbiettes, please contact Maura Cliford at Maclif56@gmail.com
THE CHURCH OF ST. MARY, MANHASSET HISTORY ARCHIVES PROJECT
YOUR HELP IS STILL NEEDED!
We are asking parishioners to share their memories of events at St. Mary’s, including Our Schools
Our Ministries Priests, Nuns, Teachers & Staff Who Served Here Sacraments Celebrated at Our Church
We continue to collect any items at the Parish Office as we look forward to the 100th Anniversary of the Elementary School (2026) and the 175th Anniversary of our Parish (2028). Please help us compile historical information to make these coming events very special for the entire parish.
For questions and more information, please contact: MaryLou deVenoge at 516-993-2706 or doggonelab@msn.com, Marijo Lantier at 917-4965640 or MALantier510@gmail.com.
Let the little children come to me... (Matt 19:14) Children’s Liturgy of the Word Every Sunday at the 9:00 AM Mass
We are in need of additional Prayer Leaders. Materials and training are provided; scheduling is fexible. If interested, please contact Jane Cliford at bulletin@stmary.ws or sit in with us on Sunday.
YOUR FUTURE BEGINS HERE! Y
SAINT MARY’S COLLEGE PREPARATORY HIGH SCHOOL FOR ADMISSIONS Wednesday Oct. 23 REGISTER FOR YOUR TOUR TODAY! FROM 6:00-8:00 PM
In Session with Dr. Patricia Pitta
Don’t Let Your Dinner Guests Hijack Your Holiday: Set Your Boundaries with Jesus on Your Side and Center
“Te Lord will fght for you; you need only to be still.” (Exodus 14:14)
Holiday time is around the corner. Tere is talk about Tanksgiving and Christmas celebrations. Over the course of my career, there have been many people who speak to me about a relative that is coming to their home and with him/her come negative feelings and behaviors that afect the overall environment of the celebration. Te frst thought, if it is a big enough celebration, is just limit your interaction. Many times that is not possible and the holiday turns into a tension-flled experience. So, what do you do, or what do you need to do?
If you are having the holiday, you have the control. Do you believe that? You can decide who you want to invite and share in breaking bread and God’s gifts. When I say that, I get looks of being in shock. Some have said, “Do you mean not to invite my sister, brother, aunt, uncle, mom, or dad?” I usually answer, “How does that thought make you feel?” One usually says he/she would not like that relative present, but the thought of not extending an invite sends chills up the spine and the stomach turns.
When I further explore, the thought of setting a boundary to protect one’s environment is a daunting idea. People are used to sacrifcing for the sake of the family or holiday. Te host usually fnds themself so tense and distraught that they breathe a sigh of relief when the day passes. How sad is that! To
spend so much time in preparation and then to be robbed of the joy of pleasant interactions with your guest(s). I bet you can all relate to this thought in some manner even if you have never experienced it personally.
So, you have a brother and sister who don’t get along and when they come to holiday dinner there is always tension and sometimes out-right arguments and some have reported people becoming physical. If there is any threat of physical action, this is a no brainer. Don’t invite these people. You have the right to protect yourself, your family, and other guests. Tis is a boundary you need to respect.
If you have family members in a feud with each other, tell them to work out their problems together before they think about attending a celebration at your home. People usually say, “Not to have my _____ at my dinner?” I say give them the responsibility to work out their issues; otherwise, the invitation is not available to them. People usually say that this is unthinkable. I answer, “Is it thinkable that you prepare for hours for the celebration, and you end up sick to your stomach or so tense that the joy is gone?” Is that fair for you, your guests, and family? Te answer is, “NO!”
It is not your job to solve the issues of the feuding family members. It is your job to set boundaries to protect yourself, your family, and guests. Someone said, “Tey will not be invited to their house in the future?” I usually answer, “It is better to be alone or with those who act appropriately than be badly accompanied for fear of loneliness.” If you relate to any of these scenarios, you need to realize that to celebrate holidays with others should not be at the expense of your mental health.
Te power of prayer can help you fnd solutions to these dilemmas. After you tell the feuding family members that they need to work out their issues before they can attend your dinner, you can ofer them the opportunity to come to your house and pray together to fnd peace so they can fnd solutions to their situation. You will ofer the space, time, and prayer and tell them you will not discuss the issues but give family members the opportunity to be together in prayer. It will be their decision after the meeting to talk together to try and fnd resolutions. Don’t join in that discussion. Tey should tell you when they have reached a solution that will enable them to be together in a peaceful manner opening the invite to your home for dinner and holiday celebration.
If you struggle with the fear of loneliness, which is part of the human condition, your faith ofers many opportunities to make new connections with people through expressing your love of God and getting closer to God through Bible Study. Te Bible has many answers to everyday problems since your problems have been happening since the beginning of time. And unfortunately, the human condition enables the problems and behaviors to be repeated.
Te Human Condition, written by Tomas Keating (1999), discusses the fragility of being human and how practicing Contemplation enables you to get in touch with God within you that can help transform your thoughts, deeds, and actions. Trough this practice, you can fnd the strength to be able to take the necessary steps to make changes in your life and one can be creating an environment for the holidays flled with love and with little or no tension.
(continued -->)
Dr. Patricia Pitta (con’t.)
If you have a situation that troubles you, allow yourself to contemplate calm within you (to start the practice: stay silent and calm for ten minutes and then pray to God to give you the strength to take the action to resolve your dilemma. Do this daily and you will fnd a peace will come over you). In this instance, that means confronting the negative people and setting your boundary. You need to insist that the negative people fnd ways to manage their relationships in a positive way, otherwise the invite is of.
What you are doing is setting strong and healthy boundaries for you and your guests with the love of God as your center and either people conform to appropriate behaviors, or they cannot join in the celebration. I know you can do this. Te thought is probably jarring. Spend time in contemplation and then about you owning your power in the name of our Lord who will strengthen you to be able to take the necessary steps to fnd your peace within and create a celebration that brings peace and love to those who attend in the name of Jesus. Below is a prayer that will help you ease your sense of wellbeing to empower you to get in touch with the love of Jesus and strengthen you to set your boundaries where you need to. Te beauty about the Lord is HE always available to help you. You just need to ask HIM and spend the time. You will be successful!
Stay quiet and calm your mind for 10 minutes and then say the following:
My dear Lord, you are my faithful friend and companion. I need your help in enabling me to say that which I feel and need to say to provide an environment that is flled with love and respect for myself and those who are in my life. May your strength give me the power to confront those I must with love and kindness and the hope that change can be realized.
Keating, T. (1999) Te Human Condition. Paulist Press, New York
Dr. Pitta (drpatriciapittaphd.com) is a Clinical Psychologist and a Board-Certifed Couple and Family Psychologist practicing in Manhasset and is the chair of the Mental Health Ministry of St. Mary’s. She is the former director of the Post graduate training program at St. John’s University. She is the author of Solving Modern Family Dilemmas: An Assimilative Terapy Model published by Routledge (2014) and Integrative Couple, and Family Terapies published by the American Psychological Association (2019).
C ANDLE L IGHTING V ESPERS S ERVICES CATHOLIC CEMETERIES OF LONG ISLAND
Catholic Cemeteries of Long Island invites all families to attend our Candle Lighting Vespers Services on Sunday, October 27th at 3 PM.
Vespers is a traditional and solemn evening prayer service of thanksgiving and praise in the Roman Catholic liturgy. We welcome you to join us in our Chapels at Cemetery of the Holy Rood , Queen of Peace Cemetery , and Holy Sepulchre Cemetery as we honor the memories of those who have been laid to rest at our cemeteries. The ceremonies will include prayer, song, and a candle lighting service. During each service, all attendees will have the opportunity to say aloud the name of their dearly departed family members and friends.
Date: Sunday, October 27, 2024
Time: 3:00 PM
Locations
Cemetery of the Holy Rood
111 Old Country Rd, Westbury, NY 11590
Queen of Peace Cemetery
321 Jericho Tpke, Old Westbury, NY 11568
Holy Sepulchre Cemetery 3442 Route 112, Coram, NY 11727
CCLongIsland.org
First Time
Andrew Ciaccia and Amanda Lopez
St. Claire, St. Mary, Bronx, NY Manhasset, NY
Bryan Heron and Elianna Enriquez
St. Mary of the Isle, St. Mary, Long Beach, NY Manhasset, NY
Second Time
Robert Zellner and Nina Zing
Notre Dame, St. Mary, New Hyde Park, NY Manhasset, NY
Tird Time
Andrew Vita and Kristen LaBruna
St. Catherine of Siena St. Mary, Mountain Lakes, NJ Manhasset, NY
Business Owners:
Please consider advertising in our bulletin. It’s a great way to support our parish. Call our printer, LPi, at 1-800-477-4574
Please Patronize Our Advertisers
Exposition and Adoration of the Blessed Sacrament
Psalm 145. Verses 1-21
1 Praise. Of David. I will extol you, my God and king; I will bless your name forever and ever.
2 Every day I will bless you; I will praise your name forever and ever.
3 Great is the LORD and worthy of much praise, whose grandeur is beyond understanding.
4 One generation praises your deeds to the next and proclaims your mighty works.
5 Tey speak of the splendor of your majestic glory, tell of your wonderful deeds.
6 Tey speak of the power of your awesome acts and recount your great deeds.
7 Tey celebrate your abounding goodness and joyfully sing of your justice.
8 Te LORD is gracious and merciful, slow to anger and abounding in mercy.
9 Te LORD is good to all, compassionate toward all your works.
10 All your works give you thanks, LORD and your faithful bless you.
11 Tey speak of the glory of your reign and tell of your mighty works.
12 Making known to the sons of men your mighty acts, the majestic glory of your rule.
13 Your reign is a reign for all ages, your dominion for all generations. Te LORD is trustworthy in all his words, and loving in all his works.
14 Te LORD supports all who are falling and raises up all who are bowed down.
15 Te eyes of all look hopefully to you; you give them their food in due season.
16 You open wide your hand and satisfy the desire of every living thing.
17 Te LORD is just in all his ways, merciful in all his works.
18 Te LORD is near to all who call upon him, to all who call upon him in truth.
19 He fulflls the desire of those who fear him; he hears their cry and saves them.
20 Te LORD watches over all who love him, but all the wicked he destroys.
21 My mouth will speak the praises of the LORD; all fesh will bless his holy name forever and ever.
Notes: Psalm 145 is a hymn in acrostic form; every verse begins with a successive letter of the Hebrew alphabet. Acrostic poems usually do not develop ideas but consist rather of loosely connected statements.
Te singer invites all to praise God (vv. 1–3, 21).
Te “works of God” make God present and invite human praise (vv. 4–7); they climax in a confession (vv. 8–9).
God’s mighty acts show forth divine kingship (vv. 10–20), a major theme in the literature of early Judaism and in Christianity. (Source: USCCB)
Exposition and Adoration of the Blessed Sacrament with Closing Benediction Mondays 3:00 - 5:00 PM in the Church
St. Mary’s Will Join with Parishes Praying for Priests and United in Eucharistic Adoration on Tuesday, October 29th 6:30 - 8:30 PM in the Church with a talk by Fr. Anthony Saliba
Parishes of the Rockville Centre Diocese are answering Our Lady’s call to pray for our Shepherds. They will spiritually unite by offering prayer and adoration for priests on the same evening at the same time in the individual churches. All are invited to join us to pray for each priest and seminarian of our diocese by name. For more information, contact Cathy at cfmorriss@aol.com.
Are You Interested in Serving St. Mary’s as an Extraordinary Minister of Holy Communion (EM) or a Lector?
Te Diocese of Rockville Centre has announced Fall Training Dates and Locations Please Note: Only candidates recommended by the Pastor are eligible for the training
Send an email to Fr. Bob at pastor@stmary.ws to tell him of your interest in becoming an EM and/or Lector and give the date and location of the training session(s) you prefer
For Extraordinary Ministers of Holy Communion, Part A* and Lectors
Tuesday, October 22nd - St. Elizabeth in Melville - 7:00 - 10:00 PM
Tursday, November 14th - St. Agnes in Rockville Centre - 7:00 - 10:00 PM
Saturday, December 7th - Immaculate Conception in Westhampton Beach - 9:00 AM - 12:00 Noon
For Extraordinary Ministers of Holy Communion, Part B*
Tuesday, October 29th - St. Elizabeth in Melville - 7:00 - 10:00 PM
Wednesday, December 4th - St. Agnes in Rockville Centre - 7:00 - 10:00 PM
Saturday, December 7th - Immaculate Conception in Westhampton Beach - 1:00 - 4:00 PM**
*Extraordinary Minister of Holy Communion, Part A Training - Tis “BASIC” training is required of all those beginning as Ministers. Tose wish to minister in hospitals, nursing homes, eldercare facilities, and to the homebound are required to attend Part B Training in addition to BASIC Training. BASIC Training must be taken before the Part B Training. If you have taken the Part A Training only in the past, but would now like to serve in hospitals, etc. you should indicate your interest in EM Part B Training only. Questions about EM training and service may be directed to Jane Cliford, Coordinator of EMs at St. Mary’s, at bulletin@stmary.ws.
**We are ofering Part A and Part B on the SAME day. Tose who attend Part A in the morning are welcome to bring lunch or leave for lunch and return for the 1:00 PM Part B session. Only those pre-registered for part B will be allowed to stay for this second session.
Lector training may be taken by both new and experienced lectors. Questions about serving as a Lector at St. Mary’s may be directed to Rich Bentley, Coordinator of Lectors at St. Mary’s, at RBentley@downstate.edu.
Twenty-Ninth Sunday In Ordinary Time
Receive mercy and grace in your relationship. Check out a Worldwide Marriage Encounter Experience today. You can fnd one by looking up WWME.org. Some of the dates to sign up are:
November 1-3, 2024, Glen Rock, NY
November 4-25, 2024 (Virtual)
November 8-10, Huntington, NY
November 15-17, 2024, Bennington, VT
Worldwide Marriage Encounter sponsors a variety of in-person and virtual marriage experiences, some on weekends and some on seven weekdays. Couples explore their relationship with each other, God, and the Church. Registration is limited; there is a $100 application fee. For more information or to apply, call Kevin & Regina Hickson at 516-554-3835 or https://wwmenyli.org/.
