PARENTING
WHY PARENTING STYLE MATTERS WRITTEN BY T.E. CUNNINGHAM
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arenting is one of the most rewarding—and occasionally frustrating—experiences we are blessed with in life. And how you parent affects your child’s self-esteem, health, and development. How you influence your children will stick with them for the rest of their lives. It is widely held via extensive research that there are four main parenting styles, and that these styles are most on display when the parent is exhausted or stressed.
Authoritarian This parenting style might be best summed up by “you believe when it comes to your children, it is my way or the highway!” Rules are made to be followed. While discipline is a good parenting tool, not considering your child’s feelings can have very negative results. For instance, if
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SEPTEMBER 2021
your child seeks to understand why you have made a particular decision, instead of explaining, you might offer a simple, “because I told you so.” You may not be allowing your children to problem-solve and learn to make decisions for themselves later in life. Additionally, studies have shown children parented in this way may suffer from low self-esteem and develop aggressive and mean behaviors. Finally, children who are parented by authoritarian parents learn to become pretty good liars; they do this to avoid harsh punishment for mistakes.
Authoritative
These parents still demand much from their children, but authoritative parenting is generally considered the most effective parenting style. These children tend to perform bet-
ter than those of other styles in academia, social interaction, emotional development, and so forth. One of the great things about being an authoritative parent is you demand the most of yourself as a parent— you hold yourself, not just your child, accountable. You put serious time into your child and the relationship, and while you still have rules, you will explain to your child why those rules are in place. You still hold your child accountable when they mess up, but you consider how to handle those instances by evaluating why your child broke a rule. You also take their feelings and opinions about the situation into account versus handing out instant punishment. You also reward and praise your children when they do good work and deeds. Children raised in this manner tend to become success-
