The Knot Winter 2023

Isle never forget this moment

The promise of forever. The wedding of your dreams. The honeymoon you’ll never forget. Extraordinary moments like these deserve to be celebrated at the adults-only oasis of Sandals® or the family-friendly resorts of Beaches®. Fall in love with the Caribbean and experience the excitement that comes with saying, “Isle do.”

Cue t

Cue the Confetti 2023

FEATURES

60 OUR WEDDING WISDOM

The Knot editors share their real-life wedding experiences from the perspective of a motherof-the-groom, a former planner and more.

80 THE LOVERS’ LEXICON Modern relationship terms explained.

82 THIS KISS Smooching 101: The science behind it, tips for the first kiss and lip-print analyses. Plus, editor-tested, party-proof lipsticks!

94 IT’S NOT ABOUT THE DISHES Break unhealthy patterns in your relationship with our journaling exercise.

96

THE STATE OF THE UNION

Our newest study reveals how Gen Z and millennials feel about the future of marriage and relationships.

100

IN HER FEELINGS

Yellowjackets star Samantha Hanratty shares the details of her love story and upcoming nuptials.

120

THE SUITE ESCAPE Luxurious, amenityfilled honeymoon accommodations that are worth the splurge.

ON THE COVER y by Lauren Photography yling by Rebecca Dukoff; styling Rebecca hair by Andre Gunn; Denn air Andre Gunn; Dennett; y Adam Breuchaud; m Adam y Susie Kourinian; y Susie Kourinian; by Gabriela Cobar. Gabriela Cobar capelet by D La Renta; earrings O a Renta; ato. b

In Her Feelings Veil by Chopova Lowena for SSENSE Exclusive; necklace by De Beers.

y Lauren

Cue the Confetti

FASHION & BEAUTY

90 GOOD TIME Commemorate the wedding day with these stylish watches.

110 COMMON SCENTS

Find your signature fragrance.

114 I DO! Unexpected engagement and wedding rings that make an impact.

STYLE & PLANNING

25 EDITORS’ PICKS Glamorous bows, registry upgrades, celebratory spirits and more.

56

65

DON’T STOP THE MUSIC

Create the perfect wedding soundtrack with expert tips.

70

A GUIDE TO MAKING THE BEST WEDDING TOAST

Let these fill-in-theblank templates do all the work.

42

’70s DISCO-GLAM VIBES

A New York couple throws a wild party to match their fantastical style.

48

LIKE WALKING ON WATER

72

with novel experiences

HOW DELIGHTFUL Surprise your guests with novel experiences.

WEDDINGS OF THE WORLD

Explore beautiful traditions across cultures and religions.

LOVE

36

IT’S YOU AND ME, HONEY

A SoCal wedding full of personal touches and special details.

Different cultures and backgrounds come together for a dream celebration.

IN THIS ISSUE

14 ED LETTER

16 THE DOWNLOAD

22 DEAR LENNON

54 THE SEASON’S INGREDIENT

128 WISE WORDS

EXECUTIVE EDITOR

Lauren Kay

EDITORIAL OPERATIONS MANAGER

Meesha Diaz Haddad

CREATIVE DIRECTOR

Nathalie Kirsheh

DEPUTY EDITOR

Esther Lee

FASHION & BEAUTY

FEATURES & TRAVEL

SENIOR EDITOR, RELATIONSHIPS & SEX Jamie Cuccinelli

EDITOR, ENTERTAINMENT & CELEBRITY Sarah Hanlon

PLANNING & STYLE

SENIOR EDITOR Kim Forrest

SENIOR EDITOR, WEDDINGS Hannah Nowack

EDITOR Samantha Iacia

ASSISTANT EDITOR Chapelle Johnson

STRATEGY, OPERATIONS & COMMERCE

DIRECTOR, DIGITAL CONTENT STRATEGY MaryKate Callahan

ASSOCIATE DIRECTOR, EDITORIAL OPERATIONS Samantha Langabeer

SENIOR MANAGER, COMMERCE CONTENT STRATEGY Emily Platt

COMMERCE EDITOR Cathryn Haight

FASHION CONTENT STRATEGIST Nicole Taliaferro

PLANNING & STYLE CONTENT STRATEGIST Taylor Whitten

ASSOCIATE COMMERCE EDITOR Naoimh O’Hare

ASSISTANT COMMERCE UPDATES EDITOR Emily Rumsey

DIGITAL EDITORIAL PRODUCER Julie Le Blanc

ASSISTANT DIGITAL EDITORIAL PRODUCER Doireann Mangan

SOCIAL MEDIA & TALENT

DIRECTOR, SOCIAL MEDIA Whitney Little

SENIOR MANAGER, SOCIAL MEDIA Mina Garagozlo

SOCIAL MEDIA MANAGER Danielle Savoy

SOCIAL MEDIA SPECIALISTS Lucy Ferut, Alli Kennon

SOCIAL MEDIA COORDINATORS Meghan Ho, Kerre Jo Lattanzio

SENIOR MANAGER, INFLUENCERS Heather Kon

INFLUENCER SPECIALIST Kimberly Brown

SIZE INCLUSIVITY & BEAUTY EDITOR Lauren Whalley

ASSOCIATE FASHION EDITOR, MENSWEAR Tres Dean

ASSISTANT FASHION COMMERCE EDITOR Sofia Deeb

CONTRIBUTING FASHION EDITOR Rebecca Dennett

VIDEO, VISUALS & PRODUCTION

VIDEO PROGRAMMING Amanda Miller

DIRECTOR OF EDITORIAL

ASSOCIATE DIRECTOR, EDITORIAL VIDEO Ash Tulett

EDITORIAL VIDEO MANAGER Kelsey Theisen

DESIGNER Ashley Detmering

DIGITAL DESIGNER Tiana Crispino

CONTRIBUTING PHOTO EDITOR Lauren Kill

CONTRIBUTING COPY EDITOR Rebecca Dalzell

CONTRIBUTING RESEARCH EDITOR Keith Bearden

CREATIVE SERVICES

SENIOR DIRECTOR, HEAD OF GLOBAL CREATIVE Jeffra Trumpower

CREATIVE DIRECTOR Rishi Magia

ASSOCIATE DIRECTOR, VIDEO & PHOTO PRODUCTION Daniela Kelley McInerney

VIDEO EDITOR Malu Frasson Nori

CREATIVE PHOTO PRODUCTION MANAGER Jessica Kane

GLOBAL MARKETING

CHIEF MARKETING OFFICER Jenny Lewis, jlewis@theknotww.com

VICE PRESIDENT, GLOBAL CONSUMER & B2B MARKETING Kiara Kempski, kkempski@theknotww.com

DIRECTOR

HEAD OF GLOBAL EDITORIAL CONTENT Annie Lennon Carroll, acarroll@theknotww.com

SENIOR DIRECTOR, COMMUNICATIONS Melissa Bach, pr@theknotww.com

BRAND STRATEGY & MEDIA, CONSUMER MARKETING Pamela Solis, psolis@theknotww.com

DIRECTOR, CORPORATE COMMUNICATIONS Anni Jones

ASSOCIATE DIRECTOR, PUBLIC RELATIONS Jennifer Myers

ASSOCIATE DIRECTOR, INTEGRATED BRAND PLANNING & ANALYSIS Jesse Geiger

MANAGER, INTEGRATED BRAND PLANNING & ANALYSIS Chelsea McArdle

GLOBAL MEDIA SOLUTIONS @ THE KNOT WORLDWIDE

SENIOR VICE PRESIDENT, GLOBAL MEDIA SOLUTIONS Nicole Aste, naste@theknotww.com

SENIOR DIRECTOR, REVENUE OPERATIONS & YIELD Dominique Walker, dwalker@theknotww.com

ASSOCIATE DIRECTOR, REVENUE OPERATIONS Jenna Bruno, jbruno@theknotww.com

SENIOR ANALYST, REVENUE OPERATIONS Cheryl Cincotta, ccincotta@theknotww.com

VICE PRESIDENT, AD SALES Risa Aronson, raronson@theknotww.com

BRIDAL FASHION SENIOR ACCOUNT DIRECTOR Brett Olsen, bolsen@theknotww.com

SENIOR ACCOUNT DIRECTOR Tina LoRegio, tloregio@theknotww.com

ACCOUNT DIRECTORS, EAST Cara Goldberg, cgoldberg@theknotww.com

Erin Perley, eperley@theknotww.com

Debbie Konstadt, dkonstadt@theknotww.com

ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES, EAST Brooke Morgan, bmorgan@theknotww.com

Giavanna Cifelli, gcifelli@theknotww.com

ACCOUNT DIRECTOR, PACIFIC Karen Argow, kargow@theknotww.com

ACCOUNT EXECUTIVE, WEST Debbie Lucas, dlucas@theknotww.com ACCOUNT DIRECTOR, MIDWEST Laura Adrian, ladrian@theknotww.com

SENIOR DIRECTOR, INTEGRATED MARKETING Priya Junnarkar

ASSOCIATE DIRECTOR, SALES DEVELOPMENT MARKETING Jessica Bendes MANAGERS, SALES DEVELOPMENT MARKETING Zoë Ferranti, Carly Kleinman

ASSOCIATE MANAGER, SALES DEVELOPMENT MARKETING Giovanna Rubino

ASSOCIATE DIRECTOR, CREATIVE SOLUTIONS Elizabeth Roehrig

SENIOR MANAGER, BRANDED CONTENT Kate Traverson

EDITOR, BRANDED CONTENT Sarah Fine

ASSOCIATE ART DIRECTOR Amanda Kocis Gallagher

ASSOCIATE GRAPHIC DESIGNER Anahí Garza-Runfola

SOCIAL MEDIA EDITOR Nicole Smith

ASSOCIATE SOCIAL MEDIA EDITOR Gabriela Maceira

SENIOR DIRECTOR, ACCOUNT MANAGEMENT Nicole Vogel, nvogel@theknotww.com

MANAGERS, ACCOUNT MANAGEMENT Jessica Van Alphen, jvanalphen@theknotww.com

Morgan Fahey, mfahey@theknotww.com

SENIOR ACCOUNT MANAGER Elena Semenza, esemenza@theknotww.com

ACCOUNT MANAGERS Alaina Gosh, agosh@theknotww.com

Daniela Lopez, danlopez@theknotww.com

Jaclyn Lash, jlash@theknotww.com

Kaitlin Fitzgerald, kfitzgerald@theknotww.com

Lindsey Aloia, laloia@theknotww.com

Melanie Hurley, mhurley@theknotww.com

Sarah Lovejoy, slovejoy@theknotww.com

ACCOUNT MANAGER ASSOCIATE Jordan Speranza, jsperanza@theknotww.com

ACCOUNT COORDINATOR Holly Nowell, hnowell@theknotww.com

PUBLISHED BY XO GROUP INC. 2 Wisconsin Circle, 3rd Floor, Chevy Chase, MD 20815. TheKnot.com

(pg 25)

Let’s Party Let’s

As this issue hits newsstands, my husband, Adam, and I will celebrate 10 years of marriage. Ten. It feels like yesterday and a lifetime ago, all at once. Looking back, I can confidently say, I have no regrets. Lots of things went wrong on our wedding day: It rained, we cut into the Styrofoam layer of our cake, and our toasting flutes broke. But none of it mattered. Perhaps I believe too much in fate and that everything happens for a reason (the 10-year hindsight may help too), but I only have fond memories of our wedding day. When it was all said and done, we ate the cake, we danced in the rain and collapsed into bed at 4 AM. I married my person and it was magic.

At The Knot, we have a saying: “There’s magic in the mayhem.” I hope you’ll carry that with you as you quibble over the guest list or compromise on your vision for the décor. When the day finally arrives, I can almost guarantee some mayhem (turn to page 60 to read a firsthand account) but boy, will there be magic. We also take celebrating seriously, which is why we’ve gathered the best surprise-and-delight moments for guests (pg 56) and written your next toast for you (pg 70), sort of. We’re also sharing our favorite wedding traditions from around the world (pg 72) alongside the perfect celebratory sips (pg 28).

carry that with you as you over the guest list or on your vision for the décor When the arrives, I can almost guarantee some (turn to page 60 to read a firsthand account) but will there be magic We also take which is we’ve the best moments for guests 56) and written your next toast for you sort of We’re also our favorite traditions from around the world 72) the 28).

You’ve done the hard work finding your person—now comes the fun!

You’ve done the hard work your person now comes the fun!

— LAUREN KAY, EXECUTIVE EDITOR

Nail your first kiss, and find out what your lips say about you. (pg 82)

LAUREN

I’ve always been a bow girl and adore the imperfectness of this pair.

Ten years is worthy of a second honeymoon, right? (pg 120)

AKA THE PLACE WHERE WE SHAMELESSLY PROMOTE OUR OWN STUFF.

The Download

Who’s on the List

It’s PARTY TIME

Navigating guest lists can be tricky—but we’re here to help. Our Guest List & RSVP tool helps you manage it all. You can quickly import multiple guests at once from your phone’s contacts, or if you’ve already geeked out over a spreadsheet, upload that. Missing addresses? Likely. You can email guests a private form to collect the necessary deets and keep all the contact info in one place. We won’t leave you high and dry—we do RSVPs too. Whether you send paper or digital invites, you can collect your yeses and nos and then share them with your vendor team. You are going to be your caterer’s favorite client. Trust.

Let’s Plan This Thing

The Knot Vendor Marketplace is the stuff of legend—and for good reason. Not only can you read reviews from couples like you, but we can make personalized recommendations based on your locale. Once you’ve secured your venue, we can connect you with pros booked by couples who got married there too. So if you’re just starting your planning journey, we’ve got you. And if you’re ready to say “I do” and realizing maybe you should have taken those dance lessons ahead of your moment in the spotlight, we can hook you up.

Your Virtual Assistant Is In

If you haven’t already created a wedding website, let this be your sign to do it (now). We offer completely free websites. Even if you aren’t jet-setting to the Caribbean to exchange vows, a website comes in clutch during the wedding weekend. It’s the perfect place to include all of your wedding details like locations, transportation and dress codes. Having all the particulars in one place should save you a lot of questions leading up to the wedding day and on the day itself. Bonus: This is the only appropriate place to list your wedding registry—and we know you like a good gift.

Gift Well

Your guests want to give you something you’ll love, so do yourself a favor and set up a wish list on The Knot Registry. Our “Top Choice” feature allows you to let your guests know what really tops your list. The Knot Registry Store is a curated shopping experience—with only the best stuff—but your registry can link to other wish lists too. We have china and fluffy towels, but we also have NFL tickets, outdoor pizza ovens and GoPros. Does it get any better than that? And if it’s cash you want, you can ask for it here too.

Whether you just said yes (nice ring, btw) or are ready to hit the dance floor and live it up as *official* newlyweds, we’re here for it. We take celebrating seriously, you know. And we’re by your side through all the ups and downs of this crazy journey!

Love Languages

Organized AF

It’s easy to go over budget or let a wedding to-do slip through the cracks. (I mean, do you even know all the things you’re supposed to do?) We won’t let it happen. Having an epic checklist will keep you on track and ensure no task is overlooked. Everyone’s wedding is different, so our checklist is completely customizable. Add and remove to-dos to your heart’s content. Head to our app for what to do when and

how to do it. You can thank us later.

The of love is uni-

The language of love is universal, but bilingual wedding invites sure can help things along. We’re kind of obsessed with this showstopping design featuring vintage typography and a bold color palette. Not *exactly* your vibe? We’ve got tons of other designs to choose from too: rustic, modern, floral, vintage…we could go on. We also arm you with free design support and easy envelope addressing to make it foolproof. Still not convinced? Visit TheKnot.com/paper and use code 3Free to get three free samples.

PS: We do thank-you notes.

PPS: We do personalized guest books too.

Play That Video

DESIGNER DRESSES DECONSTRUCTED

Casablanca Bridal creative director Crystal Lu, wedding fashion expert Nayri Kalayjian and fashion historian Kimberly Chrisman-Campbell deconstruct Beyoncé’s wedding dress, designed by her mother Tina Knowles, and her Galia Lahav 10-year vow-renewal dress.

YOUR CELEBRITY WEDDING

Executive editor Lauren Kay and wedding planner Jason Rhee use Chrissy Teigen and John Legend’s Lake Como wedding as inspiration to find the perfect venue for you on The Knot Vendor Marketplace.

YOU’VE GOT MAIL

Let The Knot be your plus-one on your wedding journey with a yearlong subscription for just half of the newsstand price ($24.99). All those guest RSVPs and wedding checks need some company in your mailbox.

D.T.R.

WE’RE READY TO TAKE OUR RELATIONSHIP TO THE NEXT LEVEL, WHAT DO YOU SAY?

SLIDE INTO OUR DM’S, LET US ENTERTAIN YOU ON TIKTOK OR PIN OUR KICK-A** INSPO ON YOUR WEDDING BOARD.

Dear Lennon…

IN EVERY ISSUE, OUR ADVICE COLUMNIST WILL ANSWER YOUR JUICIEST WEDDING PLANNING QUESTIONS.

How do I deal with last-minute cancellations without losing my mind?

Dear Lennon,

My wedding is in one week and a close friend (at least I thought she was!) just told me she can’t make it—even though she RSVP’d yes. She didn’t give a reason, and I’m furious. I’d already handled the seating chart, gave our caterer the final head count, started the escort cards and everything. Can I cut her off for this?

No-Show No No

It’s hard not to go ballistic when a wedding guest cancels at the last minute, but the reasons may be super-personal and beyond your friend’s control. Prying isn’t the right move here. Your best bet is to enjoy your day and focus on the guests who can attend, as opposed to the few who can’t. After the wedding, reach out to your friend to see how she’s doing. This should come from a place of genuine concern and not criticism— there’s no need to make her feel worse about the situation. And do not—we repeat, do not—send her an invoice or bill for not showing up. By doing that, you’re effectively ending your relationship, and really, is it worth it? It’s time to move on and enjoy married life.

Can I reject my parents’ guest list?

Dear Lennon,

My fiancé and I have fallen in love with a wedding venue. The only problem is it can only accommodate 100 guests. Between our close families and friends, we should be fine, but my parents have presented us with a huge guest list that would take us well over the venue’s capacity. We’re paying for most of the wedding, but our families are chipping in—and more guests mean a higher budget, right? Can I tell my parents they need to cut their guest list?

More Guests, More Problems

One of the hardest parts of wedding planning is remembering this mantra: If they pay, they get a say. The fact that your parents are contributing financially means that they have a say in the guest list. You can handle this situation in a few ways. Option 1 is to explain to your parents that you’ve fallen in love with a venue and ask if they could cut their guest list to accommodate. Divide the 100-guest capacity so that you and your future spouse choose half of the guests, and your parents and in-laws each get a quarter. If they decline, you have two more options. You could tell your parents that this increased guest count means you’ll need to find a new venue, which may go over budget. Are they willing to contribute more money to accommodate all of these guests? Or you could decide to pay for the wedding entirely yourselves, in which case you can invite whomever you want. None of these are easy conversations, but wedding planning is all about compromise.

My fiancé’s bach party plans are sus!

Dear Lennon, I know my fiancé’s friend group throws some wild bach parties, and I’m no prude. But when I found out the plans for my SO’s party, I was horrified—the private strippers at their rental house sent me over the edge. Do I talk to my fiancé and try to get them to change their plans? I’d even be fine if they went to a strip club!

A Bach Party Red Flag

So if you catch wind that your fiancé’s crew is doing something illegal or potentially dangerous, you should speak up and shut it down. But if their plans are just not your preference, you need to let it go (difficult as that may be). Because here’s the thing: A huge part of marriage is trust. No matter what goes down at your SO’s bach party, you should trust that they’ll be able to handle themselves. And if you feel like you can’t trust your SO in these situations, that’s a reason to seek professional couples counseling.

Got a question for Lennon?

Email

REBECCA DENNETT

1. White Milano shoulder bag, Sandy Liang for SSENSE Exclusive, $345, SSENSE.com

2. Lace dress, $4,125, AlessandraRich.com

3. Bailey bow barrette, $425, JenniferBehr.com

4. Taffeta Bow Top, $1,240, NinaRicci.com

5. Belle bow barrette, $478, JenniferBehr.com

6. Ella dress, $325, JennyYoo.com

7. Mirabelle earrings, $250, JenniferBehr.com

8. Nuptial pump, $783, MaisonErnest.com

9. Gracelyn dress with bow, $2,950, JennyYoo.com

Just like you trial run makeup for your big day, you have to trial run your procedures and skincare at least 6-9 months prior.

• I like a simple 3-step routine – including C+ Correcting Complex 30%™ in the AM, followed by sunscreen plus a retinol at night

• I use chemical peels once a quarter to help with pigmentation and fine lines.

• If you use filler, or neurotoxins, get it at least 6-9 months before the event, with a touch-up at least one month before Dr.

Omer Ibrahim Board Certified Dermatologist, Cosmetic and Laser Surgeon

CHICAGO, IL

Pour Decisions Libations

CHAMPAGNE IS TYPICALLY THE BOTTLE WE POP WHEN IT’S TIME TO TOAST AN ENGAGEMENT OR WEDDING MILESTONE. AND THOUGH THE FIZZY STUFF HAS UNIVERSAL APPEAL, IT ISN’T THE ONLY LIBATION THAT PAIRS WELL WITH CONFETTI. HERE’S A LOOK AT SOME OTHER CELEBRATORY WINES AND SPIRITS FROM ACROSS THE COUNTRY AND AROUND THE WORLD. *CLINK.*

1. Tequila

We’re no stranger to the party power of tequila, but the agave-based spirit shouldn’t just be reserved for margarita nights. Toasting with it to mark happy occasions is Mexico’s answer to clinking champagne glasses. $53, Casamigos Blanco Tequila, Drizly.com

2. Palm Wine

Palm wine is a staple at celebrations in Nigeria. There’s even a wedding tradition where one member of the couple searches for the other, who’s hidden in the crowd. Once the found partner drinks from the glass, the guests shower blessings on the duo. $8, Nkulenu’s Palm Drink, ErAfricanOnlineStore.com

Italy’s answer to champagne, prosecco is effervescent and bright, boasting more delicate bubbles than its French counterpart. This one has a balanced bouquet of fruit and jasmine. $16, Maresina, Drizly.com

Cups of sake are exchanged along with vows in Japanese Shinto wedding ceremonies; the tradition is called “san san kudo.” This bottle is sweet, with notes of milky melon. $24, Kurosawa Nigori, TippsySake.com

BY CATHRYN HAIGHT

5. Sparkling Cider

If you prefer your bubbles sans booze, sparkling apple cider is a classic. Opt for a bottle with some terroir and depth (unlike the ciders of childhood served on New Year’s Eve) to keep things sophisticated. $20, Ellie’s Nonalcoholic Cider, ShopCider.com

6.

Bruidstranen

Called “bridal tears,” this festive bottle is given as a Dutch wedding gift. It’s smooth, sweet and citrusy, and shimmery bits of gold and silver leaf float in the liqueur. It’s near impossible to find this exact bottle in the US, but if you like the sentiment, try a bottle of orange-cinnamon cognac (it has similar tasting notes to the Bruidstranen).

7.

Pét-Nat

Pét-nats are all the rage these days, but these bubbles are made using the oldest sparkling wine method in the world. Pétnat is fermented inside the bottle, yielding softer bubbles. $45, Lily’s Pet Nat Sparkling Chardonnay, DonkeyandGoat.com

8.

Cava

This sparkling Spanish wine is made using similar methods to champagne. It leans more fruity and tangy in flavor thanks to its base of regional grapes and a shorter aging process. $15, Dibon Cava Brut Reserve, Drizly.com

3. Prosecco

4. Sake

Shine Bright

LET YOUR ENSEMBLE SHIMMER. A FLECK OF SPARKLE OR A TOTALLY SEQUINED ’FIT WILL CATCH THE LIGHT—AND ADMIRING LOOKS.

BY REBECCA DENNETT

1. The Beautyverse palette, $75, CharlotteTilbury.com

2. Sequin mini shift dress, $3,190, CarolinaHerrera.com

3. Medici headband, $695, JenniferBehr.com

4. Valentino dress, $9,900, Valentino.com

5. Top handle crystal squares clutch, $4,995, JudithLeiber.com

6. Silver hand-embroidered crystal mesh dress, $64,500, TomFord.com

7. Sweater, $900,and pants, $1,190, Rabanne.com

8. Love 100 pumps, $825, JimmyChoo.com

9. Lab-grown diamond bypass engagement ring, $10,860, Badgley Mischka, GrownBrilliance.com

10. Lit Up highlight stick in Pärla, $48, Westman-Atelier.com

Registry Revamp

1. The two-toned tint on these wine glasses feels ultra-modern, as does their architectural shape. Choose between three sherbet shades. $72 for set of 4, Anthropologie.com

2. This set of two measuring cups is great for kitchen prep and tableside serving. $70, GreatJones.com

3. A modern electric kettle is the stuff of kitchen dreams. This option with a gooseneck spout provides a perfect pour. From $165, WilliamsSonoma.com

4. This enamel-handled, multicolored set will have you feeling as if you’re eating on a patio in Italy (even if it’s just your kitchen on a Tuesday). From $100, Food52.com

5. Ask anyone who stays at a Ritz-Carlton property: Italian-made Frette linens are butter-soft and beloved

by hotel guests. From $650, Bloomingdales.com

6. Modernize the classic crystal vase by opting for this fluted soda-lime glass vessel instead. $15, CB2.com

7. Trade in the white marble cheese board for this square option made from a slab of green onyx. $128, Anthropologie.com

8. Forget the bar cart—the bar cabinet is in. This two-tone option features a timeless checkered pattern. $1,599, WestElm.com

BY CATHRYN HAIGHT

It’s You and Me, Honey

STORY BY HANNAH NOWACK PHOTOGRAPHY BY SPOSTO PHOTOGRAPHY

Ada Ng (26, a medical school student) and Kevin Wang (27, a software engineer) met way back in high school, so it’s no surprise that they share quite a few inside jokes. And what better way to plan a wedding that authentically represents a relationship than to use humorous memories as inspiration?

Ada shares that her wedding planner’s attention to detail was one of her favorite parts about the entire celebration. “The team took details from our relationship and incorporated so much meaning into the decor,” she says. “The honey, the ‘late-night snackies’ and the birds dotting the tables were all references to jokes I share with Kevin. It was such a treat.”

To inform the SoCal event, Ada and Kevin dreamt up an overarching Amalfi–meets–San Diego color palette. “I’ve loved the bougainvillea, lemons and chinoiserie contrast since I was young, but as time went on, my tastes evolved into a more classic summery color palette,” Ada says. Thus, she and Kevin chose a cheerful scheme for their June 25, 2022, wedding at Chez Balliet in San Marcos, California.

The most prominent inside joke of the event was the nod to “late-night snackies,” which is how the couple refers to their obsession with midnight bites. Kevin appreciates Ada’s love of discovering new eats. “She is always so excited and eager to try everything and enthusiastic about showing me things that I haven’t tried,” he says. “Her energy makes me so happy. Early on, I found that I really enjoy watching her eat. She just looks so delighted to dig in, whether it’s a new dish or an old favorite.” When they lived together in New York after college, they had

THIS AMALFI–MEETS–SAN DIEGO WEDDING DREW INSPIRATION FROM THE COUPLE’S INSIDE JOKES, COVERING EVERYTHING FROM BIRDS AND HONEY TO LATE-NIGHT SNACKS.

Trust the Pros

For the most part, Ada left flower choices to the pros. Her only request was that ranunculus, her favorite bloom, make an appearance.

All About Texture

access to many different foods—especially sweets. On one particularly memorable night, they were out to dinner and picked up a slice of cake for dessert afterward. “Seeing Ada munch on this rich, moist chocolate cake with unbridled excitement was how a favorite tradition of mine, ‘late-night snackies,’ started,” Kevin remembers.

Even Kevin’s self-penned vows touched on their mutual love of food. “I feel like our relationship has been built around shared food experiences and knew I wanted to incorporate this into the wedding,” he said. “In my vows, I put in some references to ‘late-night snackies’ and how Ada helped me discover ‘pizza that’s better than Costco pizza.’ Ada has turned me into quite a pizza snob now.”

Of course, if you’re going to talk about food during the wedding ceremony, a delicious menu better follow at the reception. Ada and Kevin’s selections didn’t disappoint. They opted for numerous food stations so they didn’t have to limit their menu to one cuisine or experience. Kevin explains that they wanted things to be “a little more interactive, so guests could explore multiple stations and pick whatever they liked.” The wedding’s six stations included a pizza truck (a must given it’s Kevin’s favorite food); roast chicken; lobster thermidor; a raw bar with oysters and local crudo; a garden bar with fresh veggies and dips; and black-garlic ravioli. To top it off, there was an open bar with beer, wine and cocktails, and a boba bar serving three flavors of bubble tea.

The snack concept extended to the dessert lineup. The couple commissioned a bakery-like vignette that included display cases reminiscent of a patisserie. On offer were Basque cheesecakes and lemon-blueberry cake. “I’m so glad we were able to incorpo-

rate ‘late-night snackies’ into the presentation for the dessert station,” says Kevin.

It would be only natural to think, “Cool, with all these nighttime treat ideas, the honey escort cards must also be a nod to a snack Ada and Kevin love.” Surprisingly, this is the one edible part of the day that actually paid homage to a different memory the couple shares. “We had honey jars with our guests’ names and table numbers calligraphed onto them to double as a favor and as an interactive seating chart. It was a sweet (pun intended) way to refer to our newly married nicknames for each other,” explains the couple. While “honey” is a common term of endearment, Ada and Kevin’s use of it is especially meaningful.

Ada lightheartedly explains that “Kevin and I fancied ourselves a serious and ma-

ture couple when we started dating at the ripe old age of 14. While workshopping nicknames for each other, we decided against ‘baby’ and ‘sweetheart’ because they were too cheesy, but we ended up calling each other ‘bb’ ironically until it accidentally stuck.” On their quest to find the perfect pet name, Ada and Kevin talked about “honey,” but Kevin was adamant that he wanted to save that nickname for when they were married. “I was quite taken with Kevin’s confidence—that’s the first time I thought he could be the one. Fast-forward several years and we now get to call each other ‘honey!’”

The nods to the couple’s relationship continued with a bird motif woven throughout the wedding. Beyond calling each other “bb” (and now “honey”), the duo like to joke about who is more birdlike in their manner-

The soft, summery reception decor included velvet, rattan and wood.

“I tend to stress out over events but surprised myself and simply coasted through the wedding, enjoying it all, thanks to our planners,” recalls Ada.

Twice as Nice

For their ceremonial cake-cutting, Ada and Kevin sliced into a single-tier salted-caramel dessert. Afterward, guests enjoyed servings of a decadent three-tier lemon-blueberry cake.

Wedding Date

June 25, 2022

Ceremony + Reception Site

Chez Balliet, San Marcos, CA

Photography

Sposto Photography

Event Planning + Design

Amorology

Floral Design

Layered Vintage

Officiant

Amy Gimlin (friend)

Gown

Liz Martinez, The White Dress, Corona Del Mar, CA

Suit

Suitsupply

Shoes

Ada: Amina Muaddi; Kevin: Ecco

Accessories

Ada: Miyabi Grace; Bridal by Valeria; Kevin: Tie Bar

Engagement + Wedding Rings

Brilliantly Engaged

Hair + Makeup

Kohnur

Wedding Party Attire Azazie

Stationery

Four Things Paper

Rentals + Decor

Back Up Backdrops; BBJ La Tavola; Catalog Atelier; Diamond Atelier; Diamond Provides; Excellent Party Rentals; Folklore; Social Lights

Catering

Miho

Cakes

Hey There, Cupcake!

Desserts

Alfa Alfajores Bakery

Music

DJ GarGar

Transportation Preferred Valet Parking

Married Moves

Ada and Kevin shared a first dance to “Best Part,” by Daniel Caesar ft. H.E.R.

isms. The avian references began in college when Ada called Kevin a “silly goose,” and snowballed from there. Kevin, who reiterates he is “clearly not a bird,” went on to tease Ada about being peckish. Now, years later, they say they’re both swans since the species notably mates for life.

On a more serious note, the couple’s wedding was also the perfect time to honor family. As such, Ada and Kevin meaningfully included their family and heritage into the event.

“It was important to both of us that we honor our Chinese heritage and give thanks to the people who helped raise us,” explains the couple. “We held a tea ceremony on the morning of the wedding with our family, close friends and wedding party.”

Ada shares that the tea ceremony was a highlight for her as it was a wedding element she’d dreamed of since she was young. Ada’s parents hosted the event, which was “buzzing with our many family members,” says Ada. “We started with some fun gate-crashing games to test Kevin’s mettle before he was allowed to enter the house to see me.” Afterward, the main tea ceremony took place. Ada and Kevin used this time to express their gratitude to their families for all the support they’d received. “Seeing everyone coming together in one space to celebrate us was humbling to witness.”

Family also played a key role in the wedding moment that both Ada and Kevin found the most memorable: the speeches.

“My father-in-law’s speech made me tear up because of the unwavering support and love in his words,” Ada says. “I remember gripping Kevin’s hand tightly when I saw him tear up as well. It struck me then that Kevin and I had so many people who came to support and celebrate us. I was definitely feeling the love.”

Kevin adds that he enjoyed the speeches by his sister-in-law and father. He was initially wary when his dad told him that the speech would be 10 minutes long, but the heartfelt toast was anything but protracted. “I saw his hand tremble from being nervous, but he spoke so well,” Kevin says. “I really liked how his speech showed his excitement and acceptance of Ada. It meant a lot to me because I used to be nervous about how he felt about Ada when we started dating in high school. He’s been very supportive of our relationship for a long time now, but it brought me to tears to hear him that day, speaking to Ada and me, voicing his love for both of us in front of all of our family and friends.”

Double Duty

During cocktail hour, guests interacted with a statement wall packed with honey wedding favors. In calligraphed jars, the sweet treats also served as escort cards.

Together, Forever

Instead of doing a first look after spending the morning apart, Eric (right) and Max “woke up together in our hotel and enjoyed brunch. We then got ready together with our photographer on hand to snap photos.”

“As queer people, we don’t often see ourselves represented in the stereotypical wedding aesthetic. It didn’t feel ‘us’ to try and force that vibe for our wedding,” say Max Aboody (33, a residential interior designer) and Eric Brodzinski (33, a product designer) of their October 9, 2022, celebration. Instead, Max and Eric planned a 1970s discoglam theme to set the scene when they tied the knot at sunset atop the roof of The Jane Hotel in New York City’s Greenwich Village. The couple wanted the day “to feel fantastical and to take advantage of the opportunity to throw a wild party.”

Max and Eric got engaged in Tel Aviv while attending their friends’ wedding. Max popped the question on a morning stroll along the Mediterranean, with surfers nearby cheering them on. After returning from their trip, Max and Eric got to work planning their own “I dos” by choosing their venue. Although they didn’t know it when they first booked The Jane Hotel, the duo later learned that the property’s penthouse was actually RuPaul’s old apartment in the 1980s. “It felt cool to get married in a space with so much queer history behind it,” the couple says. The Jane’s building also housed the Titanic survivors. “It has a lot of great history in general. We had our reception downstairs in the ballroom, which is super ornate and fit our ’70s theme perfectly. There was an oversized five-foot disco ball in the middle of the room that’s missing some of its mosaics, which gave it a ton of character.”

Max and Eric communicated their vision for disco vibes in their invitation and wedding website, both of which they designed themselves (both are professional designers).

’70s Disco-Glam Vibes

MAX & ERIC

STORY BY HANNAH NOWACK PHOTOGRAPHY BY CHRISTINA MCNEILL

WHAT DO RUPAUL, JELL-O SHOTS AND THE NYC SKYLINE HAVE IN COMMON? THIS WEDDING.

Shine On Max

“The invitation design was a psychedelic, hypnotizing spiral of text that you had to rotate to read,” says Max. “Our playful site included an ‘attire mood board,’ RSVP, other essential info about the event and a spinning disco ball that moved as you interacted with the site.” The couple shared a mood board instead of a rigid dress code because they wanted guests to come in ’70s-inspired glam attire and to remind them it wasn’t a costume party. “The event was to be a glamorous nod to ’70s disco and queer and sexual liberation. It was important for us to show many options for color, silhouettes and body types to make it as inclusive as possible. We wanted everyone to feel their most fabulous selves.”

In keeping with their shared mission to create an inclusive celebration, Max and Eric decided against having a wedding party, which they thought felt was exclusionary. “To be honest, we’re not fans of the conventional wedding traditions, as they’re not very

queer-friendly,” they explain. “We just wanted to be surrounded by our loved ones. It was very important to us that we keep conventional wedding culture out of our celebration.” The couple goes on to say that “it was important for us to commemorate the previous generations of the queer community who fought for our right to get married. We made a point to have our officiant acknowledge this in our ceremony and touched upon it in our vows.”

Any couple that’s going to hone in on disco as a theme needs to remember that

impeccably curated music selections are a must. And Max and Eric nailed it. To start the ceremony, the couple walked hand in hand down the aisle to “I Was Born to Love You,” by Freddie Mercury. “We went to Mexico earlier in the year and saw a cabaret singer perform that song and immediately knew we wanted it as our wedding song,” says Eric. “We asked our officiant to encourage guests to stand and cheer as we walked down the aisle. We wanted it to feel celebratory.” For the recessional, they played “You’re My Best Friend,” by Queen.

From there, guests transitioned to the cocktail hour with—you guessed it—more disco beats. “We played Diana Ross, Chic, Donna Summer. It was a vibe,” says the couple. During cocktail hour, guests noshed on a raw bar, paella and assorted hors d’oeuvres. As for drinks, the pair “designed a custom cocktail menu with campy names to fit our queer ’70s disco theme.” Each drink got its own creative moniker: The Polyester Top, The Bell Bottom, The Prickly Kiss and Carpet

and Eric wore ensembles custom made by a dear friend. The duo even hand-selected the sparkling fabrics for their outfits in NYC’s Garment District.

“Our wedding was a glamorous nod to ’70s disco and queer and sexual liberation. We wanted everyone to feel their most fabulous selves.”

Shine and Shimmer

When it came to their flower arrangements, Max and Eric “wanted iridescent anthuriums, a mix of bright and retro tones, and lots of texture and whimsy.”

Wedding Date

October 9, 2022

Ceremony + Reception Site

The Jane Hotel, New York City

Photography

Christina McNeill

Videography

Ink + Film Studio

Event Planning

Sara Landon Events

Event Production +

Lighting Design

Wizard Studios

Floral Design

Raymond Felton/ Love_design_party

Officiant

Rebecca Newman (friend)

Attire Alex Dymek

Accessories

Max: Ulsi Omen

Shoes

Max: Alexander

McQueen; Eric: Sunni Wedding Rings

Under the Crown

Makeup

Manana Saralidze

Invitations

Design: DIY; printing: Andrea Napchan Designs

Rentals

Broadway Party Rentals

Catering

Cobblestone Catering

DJ Lady Bunny

Entertainment Drag queen: Thorgy Thor; drag impersonator: Devon Cass; photo booth: Flux

Something Borrowed

“I knew my Elton John–inspired Gucci sunnies would come in handy one day,” remarks the couple’s photographer. “These boys would not take them off all night.”

in the Bathroom. Plus, a tray of Jell-O shots made the rounds throughout the evening.

To keep the atmosphere festive and relaxed, Max and Eric skipped a sit-down dinner. “We wanted the night to feel like a big party where everyone would be able to mingle. We had a floating dinner that was passed throughout the night: short ribs over polenta, cod over autumn vegetables and saffron pasta dishes.”

Since guests mixed and mingled all night long, they interacted not only with the couple’s drag-queen DJ, but also with a few surprise entertainers: a Liza Minnelli and Barbra Streisand impersonator, plus a favorite drag queen, Thorgy Thor. Fittingly, since The Jane once housed Titanic survivors, the latter performed Celine Dion’s “My Heart Will Go On.” “When we first started dating, we frequented a gay bar in Williamsburg, Brooklyn, called This N’ That, where Thorgy would always host and perform,” says the couple. “A few years later, she ended up on RuPaul’s Drag Race and continues to be one of our favorite queens. So it felt special to tie her into our night. We told her to surprise us with the song she’d perform to, and it was perfect. She knew we loved Celine Dion.”

Looking back on the wedding, Eric says how meaningful it was to have people from disparate parts of his and Max’s lives all together in one place. “I grew up in the Midwest, went to college in the South and then moved to NYC. It felt special to see all of these circles intertwine.” Eric goes on to share that he was “disowned by my very religious immediate family when I was younger, and they weren’t at the wedding. All of the different people we had at the wedding have supported me throughout the years and are the reason I’m here today. Seeing them all in one room dancing, laughing and enmeshing into one big happy group was a healing moment for me. I’m so grateful for all of them.”

Experiencing that love and sense of community at the wedding informed the advice Eric has for other to-be-weds: “Get weird with it. Have fun, make it authentic to who you are.” The couple emphasizes that this is a once-in-a-lifetime event so it deserves to be unique. They encourage to-be-weds who value tradition to be mindful of loved ones who might not feel included in standard wedding routines. You can make small changes where possible so everyone feels comfortable. “Having authenticity in all aspects of the day really made our wedding feel special.”

Creative Confections

Instead of cake, Max and Eric served milk-and-cookie shooters as well as freshly flambéed bananas Foster.

Like Walking on Water

A POOLSIDE REHEARSAL DINNER AND BLUE WEDDING DRESS BROUGHT THE BRIDE’S VISION OF EFFORTLESS ELEGANCE TO LIFE.

NIKITA & JAMES

STORY BY HANNAH NOWACK

PHOTOGRAPHY BY JORDAN MAUNDER PHOTOGRAPHY

Picture this: You walk into a raucous college dorm only to be greeted by a shirtless boy biking around the hallway. That was Nikita Chauhan’s (29, a structural and architectural engineer) first encounter with James Esser (29, a computer and software engineer). The interaction left her “very confused but also intrigued,” she says. “From then on, he was constantly a mystery to me.” It wasn’t until their third year of college that Nikita’s curiosity about James turned into something more—though they’d both had crushes on each other since that fateful biking encounter.

Nikita told James about an architectural history class she was taking that semester. “James was fascinated and signed up for the class on the spot. I think that eagerness and passion for the world definitely kick-started our relationship,” recalls Nikita. “The class was like a historical story time that got us excited about traveling the world, especially together. James continued to take the remaining history classes my major required, even though they had nothing to do with his degree, so he could spend time with me. They’ve always inspired our adventures.”

On one such adventure, to Seoul in 2018, James asked Nikita to marry him. When the travel-loving couple first set about wedding planning, they envisioned a destination wedding in Charleston, South Carolina. However, when COVID-19 caused them to postpone their wedding, they used the time to do some soul-searching to find the perfect venue. As the nation grappled with racial tension in 2020, Nikita and James

Tradition, With a Twist “Navigating an Indian ceremony with divorced parents was a unique experience, but we made the best decisions for us, like having my stepfather walk me down the aisle,” says Nikita.

Biking Baraat

“James was meant to ride a vintage penny-farthing bicycle for his Indian baraat entrance, because he wanted to be different,” Nikita says. “But we ended up changing out the highwheeled bicycle to a horse for safety at the last minute.”

“really took the time to think about what we learned from COVID as well as the Black Lives Matter movement and felt Charleston wasn’t aligned with our beliefs.” With family in Virginia and Philadelphia, the couple decided to marry at the Goodstone Inn in Middleburg, Virginia. “In hindsight, having the venue so close to home was perfect, because now we can go to the bar for drinks, and we’ll always feel a special connection to the space,” says Nikita.

With that portion of planning secured, the couple then settled on a theme, which Nikita describes as a “secret-garden vibe” with butterflies and Indian patterns woven in.

“Our wedding was a fusion of my Indian culture and James’ American background,” says Nikita. “We held an Indian ceremony on Friday so our families could experience the traditions. We followed it with a Western wedding (with a non-denominational ceremony) the next day. As avid tea drinkers, we

also incorporated a gung-fu tea ceremony into our Western ceremony for our unity ritual, because that felt true to us.”

Nikita shares that for James the highlight of planning the Indian ceremony was “getting to select a sword for his Indian outfit that now hangs on the wall at home.” To ensure that everyone understood what was taking place during the Friday ceremony, Nikita and James created informational program booklets that included a fun crossword puzzle and a letterpressed cover. While much of the ceremony was traditional, Nikita and James wore green, James’ favorite color, instead of the customary red.

And although it wasn’t initially planned, nontraditional outfit colors also made an appearance on Saturday. “James always told me he hoped I would wear a nontraditional, colorful wedding dress, but my response was always that my Indian outfit was green and my dream was for a white wedding dress.” As fate would have it, a blue wedding gown was the first option Nikita laid eyes on in the dress salon. “I had no intention of trying it on, as I’d always envisioned wearing white for my wedding. We tried on a number of dresses with no luck. My mother-in-

law finally convinced me to try on the blue one. Of course, the second I put it on, we all fell in love. As an avid Disney fan, I felt just like Cinderella. My love of Disney grew from multiple family vacations and lasting friendships formed during a dream internship at Walt Disney Imagineering. I kept saying I wanted a dress that would make me feel like I was walking on water and never expected to find something so perfect, down to the color,” says Nikita. While the dress was perfect, keeping it a secret from James turned out to be a tall order. Given his love of green, James wanted to wear the color again on Saturday, but Nikita was determined to get him to don a blue suit, despite his rising suspicions. In the end, both outfits came together beautifully, and Nikita finished hers off with a veil handmade by her mother. “The veil holds so much meaning to me,” she says. “I also honored her by wearing one of her gold Indian necklaces, which she gifted me.”

Not only did Nikita look the part of Cinderella, but the couple also incorporated nods to Disney throughout the wedding. Notably, Nikita processed into the Western ceremony to the iconic fairy-tale track

With a Splash

The couple planned a relaxed pool party to follow their twohour Indian ceremony. The event’s “perfect summer vibe” included a henna artist, a DJ playing fusion beats and “James getting tossed in the pool by his groomsmen after multiple rounds of flip cup,” the bride recalls.

“So This Is Love,” by Ilene Woods and Mike Douglas. The flower girls followed suit with an instrumental tune from the 2002 film Lilo & Stitch. The Disney details extended beyond the ceremony and into the reception, thanks to the couple’s creative wedding favors. Nikita and James gifted loved ones “room scents inspired by Disney World, a place near and dear to my heart,” says Nikita. “I wanted to share a sensory memory that I have of Disney with our guests.”

While highlighting their separate interests was important to the couple, neither one wanted to overlook the other’s priorities. Nikita enjoys dancing, but James isn’t a fan, so they worked together to plan a reception that balanced both of their preferences. James spent the night passing around a box of cigars and chatting with guests. “It was heartwarming to glance over at him every so often and see him in a group gathered around a lit taper candle he used to light the cigars,” Nikita remembers. “I loved getting to see him and myself in our true form, happy together and for each other without necessarily being with each other every moment of the day (which sometimes feels like an expectation for couples on their wedding). But the happiest memories have room to grow when you’re true to yourself.”

Forever in Our Hearts

The couple nodded to their late cats throughout the wedding design. “Murphey and Sun were sisters from the same cat litter who were our best friends, and we wanted to commemorate them in our wedding.” Suninspired details nodded to the eponymous cat, while butterflies represented Murphey, since “her coat looked like a caterpillar,” recalls Nikita. “Sun passed first, and when Murphey passed shortly after, we said she had transformed into a butterfly to chase the sun.”

“The vibe was relaxed and unstructured. One minute you’re getting henna done, the next you’re watching friends cannonball into the pool.”

Sunset Shots

The couple’s golden-hour photo shoot, which involved “getting drunk during our golden shots in the field,” was one of Nikita’s favorite parts of the wedding. “If you don’t like getting photos taken, take the shot and run off into the sunset,” she jokes.

Wedding Date

June 3–4, 2022

Ceremony + Reception Site

Goodstone Inn, Middleburg, VA

Photography

Jordan Maunder

Photography

Videography

Foraged Films

Event Planning

Cherry Blossom

Weddings & Events

Floral Design

Wild Fleurette

Officiants

Jess Maszal; Rakesh Pathak

Nikita’s Attire

Oscar de la Renta, Carine’s Bridal Atelier, Washington, DC; Shyamal & Bhumika

James’s Attire

Suitsupply; Shyamal & Bhumika

Accessories

DIY

Shoes

Nikita: Gucci

Engagement Ring

Mervis Diamond

Importers

Wedding Rings

David Yurman; Mervis

Diamond Importers

Hair

Shannon Kappel

Makeup

Sara Mabrouk

Stationery

Design: DIY; printing: Pyramid Atlantic Art

Center

Escort Cards

Joe Noone

Rentals

Fredericksburg

Rentals; Select Event Group; Virginia is for Lovers

Catering

Goodstone Inn

Cake

Market Salamander

Desserts

Shiney’s Sweets & Restaurant

DJ

The Dynasty DJs

THE SEASON’S INGREDIENT

1 Sugar flowers are the ultimate cake flex. Ask your pastry chef to design blooms that match your floral arrangements.

2

Fair Trade ingredients taste good and do good. Our baker used certified vanilla and sugar.

3

Spiced carrot cake and vanilla sour-cream flavors pair perfectly with honey buttercream frosting. Psst: Cinnamon is delicious year-round!

Take the Cake

Cake designers are artisans who make magic from flour and sugar. A wedding cake, after all, provides the ideal canvas for personalization, including flavors, colors and cultural details. It’s also a sweet finale at your celebration. Hire your pastry professional, then share the details you hope to incorporate into the sweet masterpiece.

CAKE BY MELISSA TORRES OF CAKE HERO

PHOTOGRAPHY BY SAMUEL MORGAN

Reimagine your wedding details. Cranes and motifs from your stationery designs can reappear on the cake.

Include nods to your heritage. This design incorporated Ginkgo leaves, which represent hope in Chinese culture.

Each sugar flower can take weeks to make. Confectionery artists hand-sculpt them using gum paste, then every petal and leaf is ruffled, veined and dusted with edible coloring. TL; DR: The more handmade details, the higher the cost.

How Delightful

SPARK JOY BY SURPRISING YOUR GUESTS WITH LITTLE UPGRADES, THOUGHTFUL GOODIES AND UNEXPECTED EXPERIENCES.

BY SAMANTHA IACIA

ILLUSTRATIONS BY SHELBY WARWOOD

Handwritten Stationery

Menus, invitations, place cards and signs all feel extrapersonal when an actual human has written the words. Traditional calligraphy is beautiful if you’re going for a formal theme, but imperfect hand-lettering adds whimsy and feels superwelcoming.

Permanent Jewelry Station

Work with a local jewelry store to send guests home with brandnew bling that will remind them of your wedding. Precious metal chains are custom-fitted as bracelets or anklets, then welded (painlessly!) together on your body in place of a clasp.

Secret Cocktail Menu

Infuse a speakeasy element into your wedding by listing your “secret” signature cocktails on the back of the regular bar menu. Or covertly add them to a private website that guests can only access by scanning QR codes hidden throughout your venue. Watch and wait as the news spreads via word of mouth.

Take-Home

Portraits

You know your guests are going to show up in their best ’fits, so hype them up with frame-worthy photos documenting their looks. Designate a second photographer to capture Polaroids of guests, hire a professional sketch artist to draw five-minute portraits, or install a dedicated #selfie mirror for DIY snaps.

Above and Beyond Amenities

You’ve heard of welcome bags—now keep the excitement going for the entire wedding weekend by surprising guests every time they retreat to their rooms. Work with hotel staff to leave goodies like custom candies and other treats during daily housekeeping or turndown service.

Wearable Wedding Swag

Design your own wedding T-shirts that guests can pick up as favors at the reception. Take inspo from vintage world tour tees and have fun with pop cultureinspired phrases like, ‘For one night only!’ or ‘Live from St. Louis!’ Don’t forget to add your personal wedding branding.

Color-Coded Attire

Get rid of the fashion guesswork by giving guests an attire color palette to work with. Share five or six color swatches on your invites or wedding website and kindly ask everyone to wear something that matches. It’s a win-win: They’ll appreciate the extra advice, and you’ll appreciate the color coordination.

ELEVATE YOUR SOUND.

WELCOME TO SOUND SOCIETY, WELCOME TO SOUND SOCIETY,

OUR ARTISTS ARE AMONG THE WORLD’S MOST GIFTED TOURING AND STUDIO MUSICIANS. THEY DELIVER UNRIVALED ENTERTAINMENT EXPERIENCES THAT GET PEOPLE DANCING – AND TALKING.

Our Wedding Wisdom

IRL, WE’RE WEDDING PARTY MEMBERS, PARENTS OF THE COUPLE, AND GUESTS TOO. WE JUST HAPPEN TO BE CELEBRATION EXPERTS. HERE’S OUR TAKE ON WEDDINGS.

EDITED BY ESTHER LEE ILLUSTRATIONS BY TIANA CRISPINO

A wedding: The focus is often on the couple, but the celebration of two people coming together is an experience that touches just about every human being across the earth. Spanning cultures, heritages, communities, identities and languages, weddings are a universal experience. While the emphasis is on the couple (and rightfully so), there’s something to be said for viewing weddings through the eyes of your loved ones, supporters and witnesses. Across these pages, you’ll see nuptials from alternate perspectives, as The Knot editors share their reflections about weddings.

The Best Advice I Gave My Son and His Fiancée

THIS MOTHER OF THE GROOM DISCOVERED A COLLABORATIVE SWEET SPOT WHILE PLANNING.

BY DIANE HALL

I’ve dedicated my career to the wedding industry, including many years as a magazine publisher and now as an editorial strategist for The Knot. Needless to say, I’ve seen plenty of wedding trends come and go over my 40-year career, but one thing remains constant: Couples want to express themselves and celebrate their love with friends and family in their own distinct way.

I DECIDED MY ROLE WOULDN’T BE, “YOU SHOULD DO THIS OR THAT,” BUT TO USE MY EXPERTISE TO SUPPORT THEIR DECISIONS…WHEN ASKED.

In 2022, my son, Ryan, confided to me and my husband that he planned to propose to his partner, Brittany, during a trip to Italy. We were ecstatic. They are so well suited for one another—we knew this was a good match. He was also the first grandchild to get married on our side of the family and anticipation abounded. My wedding brain started racing. Where are you going to propose? Have you gotten a ring yet? When do you think you’ll get married? And where? Will the venue be accessible for Granny and Grandpa? In that moment, I did manage to contain my enthusiasm and inclination to step into wedding planner mode. After all, this was their journey to discover and mine to enjoy from a healthy distance.

I decided my role wouldn’t be, “You should do this or that,” but to use my expertise to support their decisions…when asked. Personally, I didn’t want to know every detail. I wanted to enjoy their wedding, to be delighted by their choices. But there was a big piece of advice I had to impart once they returned from Italy, engaged.

To my surprise, they voiced their concern about having a wedding ceremony. They didn’t want to bore guests, and they felt self-conscious about reciting their vows. They envisioned a city hall ceremony, followed by a big party. I replied, “That’s fine, if that’s what you really want to do, but many wedding traditions have been around for centuries for good reason. There is something very special and powerful about declaring your love and commitment in front of friends and family. This is the community of people that will support you in your years of marriage. It doesn’t have to default to boring—in fact, feeling all that love and support can be a magical, memorable experience for you and your guests. It was a highlight for me and your dad.”

To my amazement, they took that advice to heart and threw a wedding—with a ceremony that was far from boring. It was a joyous and emotional experience with an electric

atmosphere, including laughter and happy tears for all. The feeling of love in the air was palpable. Among other personal touches, a surprising moment was when they played a game of Rock, Paper, Scissors to determine who would say their vows first.

Another highlight was helping the couple craft their wedding mission statement. “What is that?” they asked. “It’s your nonnegotiables on the wedding day,” I replied. It’s intended to help couples see the big picture of what they want their wedding to be. This clearly resonated. As their wedding vision came into focus, the planning, budgeting and decision-making became much easier, less stressful and more fun.

Throughout the planning process, I enjoyed hearing updates from Ryan and Brittany. While I made some suggestions, I left the details and the decisions to them. As the mother of the groom, I was reminded of a 1992 wedding scene in the TV show Northern Exposure. The philosophical radio DJ (played by John Corbett) declares, “Marriage. It’s like a cultural handrail. It links folks to the past and guides them to the future.” The thought I’m left with is what a privilege it was for me and my husband to celebrate our wedding with family and friends back in 1989, and to experience the continued love, support and friendship over 34 years of marriage. Our son and his bride received the same authentic love and support from their friends, many of whom we’ve known since grade school. Witnessing that is both satisfying and humbling, indeed.

From the Desk of a Former Wedding Planner and Current Weddings Editor

MUSINGS FROM AN EDITOR WHO PREVIOUSLY PLANNED 30-PLUS WEDDINGS.

BY HANNAH NOWACK

It’s the morning after the wedding and guests are enjoying a farewell brunch at a quaint café in rural Asheville, North Carolina. Many need to catch flights home later that day from Charlotte (two hours away). The charter buses to transport them are nowhere to be found and the pressure is on—the couple just spent half a million on their destination wedding weekend, paying a premium to fly in a photographer from Seattle, a band from New England, wine from Napa and a caterer from Georgia. Needless to say, their expectations are sky-high.

Cut to an afternoon in Charleston, South Carolina, where the reception setup is underway. The van carrying specialty rental equipment has arrived. As the door rolls up, I can immediately tell something is amiss. I’m expecting romantic upholstered wood lounge furniture. Instead, I see modern acrylic barstools that don’t match the couple’s vibe in the slightest.

What about the sudden downpour that engulfs the outdoor ceremony in a Pennsylvania meadow? I have guests arriving, an antsy mother of the groom asking me every question under the (ahem) umbrella and 100 chairs to dry within the next 15 minutes.

And then there’s this rehearsal dinner in

YOU DESERVE TO THROW YOUR WEDDING, YOUR WAY. THE PROFESSIONALS WILL HANDLE THE REST.

Atlanta. At the 11th hour, the mother of the bride realizes she made a mistake after forgetting to ask the planners to also oversee the rehearsal dinner. That’s how I ended up spending an evening at home putting my love of hand-lettering to use, calligraphing over 100 wood place cards.

All those moments I just told you about? They’re scenes I navigated early in my career as a wedding planner, before my life pivoted to that of an editor. They’re also times when things almost went awry, but quick action and a bit of gumption helped me keep each couple’s dream intact without a single guest being any the wiser.

It’s more than just doing a job. Like so many vendors, it’s in my veins to notice every detail in a wedding. For me, the obsession with weddings (which stems from the desire to

serve and support others) can be traced as far back as Halloween when I was five years old. I wanted to dress up as a bride and talked my mom into sewing an adorable white lace dress and matching veil. But it was never about a little girl dreaming of her own wedding day.

I was enamored by every facet of weddings: bringing loved ones together for a party, designing a cohesive experience…I wanted it all, and more.

From there, my passion for weddings never abated. I set out to be a wedding planner, but somewhere along the way, I found my voice as a writer. The experiences from the 30-plus weddings I planned, both rewarding and challenging, gave me an education that informs my approach as an editor at The Knot.

My belief that sparklers are the worst? That was formed after spending enough time

wrangling drunk guests, holding sticks of fire, when I wanted nothing more than to wish the newlyweds good night so I could enjoy a McDonald’s burger and fries (my postwedding guilty pleasure) on my drive home.

It’s one thing to tell couples they need to hire a professional wedding DJ. It’s another to understand just how critical it is because you’ve seen what can happen when they don’t. More than anything, I can say that every couple deserves to celebrate a wedding that is uniquely their own. For me, that isn’t something I simply parrot; it’s a perspective formed by firsthand observations. I’ve witnessed too many couples having their wedding dreams thwarted by the opinions of family. So take it from me: You deserve to throw your wedding, your way. The professionals will handle the rest.

In My Wedding Guest Era

THE FIRST FRIEND IN THE GROUP GETS MARRIED. HERE’S WHAT IT’S LIKE FOR THEIR BESTIES.

BY SARAH HANLON

I’ve been an editor at The Knot since 2019, but I didn’t experience weddings IRL until recently. As a young professional, straight out of school, I had yet to reach the stage where weddings take over the social calendar from May through November. Sometimes, I had FOMO. Sure, I’d been to select weddings in my life: a cousin’s vow renewal in 2005; a family friend’s nuptials

in 2015. But that was it. Then the summer of 2023 kicked off, and my weekends suddenly booked up with weddings of several close friends.

Like most good things in life, it was worth the wait. The first wedding was that of my college friend Harrison and his now-wife, Morgan. (Ask me about their Disney meet-cute later.) Their June 2023 wedding was held at the Sagamore resort on Lake George in New York. With a handful of my college besties, we decided to do the wedding weekend the right way. As this marked the first of our friends getting hitched, we decided to turn the weekend into an extended vacation. While some of the friends in the group attended Harrison and Morgan’s prewedding festivities, the others explored the resort and reminisced about our college days. Nestled in the Adirondacks, the wedding weekend felt like adult summer camp. We swam in the infinity pool, played pickleball, and ate (and drank) our way through dinners and the wedding reception.

Despite a forecast of rain on the big day, the mountains magically pushed the clouds away, revealing a golden-pink sunset that looked like a portrait. (It was captured perfectly by their live painter.) I was prepared to get a little mistyeyed, but once the Bridgerton-style music began, we all became puddles. The moment had arrived: Harrison became the first of our friends to get married.

The ceremony was heartfelt. It had just an

appropriate amount of Taylor Swift references and lighthearted anecdotes. We made our way through cocktail hour, featuring signature drinks and personalized napkins with fun facts (one of the bride’s favorite touches), and we danced, dined and laughed until we cried. (Don’t even ask me about the parent dances.)

We sang our favorite songs and looked on as the newlyweds made the whole place shimmer. Before the night was over, we snacked on pizza and roasted marshmallows under a full moon, illuminating the peaks of mountains. It was a core memory, if you will, a beautiful and unforgettable experience. A first through the eyes of a wedding editor.

Two weeks later, we did it again (and it was just as good).

WE SANG

OUR FAVORITE SONGS AND LOOKED ON AS THE NEWLYWEDS MADE THE WHOLE PLACE SHIMMER.

Don’t Let the Wedding Snafus Define You

BY KIM FORREST

When I was younger, I used to love the monthly “Say Anything” section in YM magazine. Teens would share their most embarrassing moments (usually having something to do with a bodily function or falling down in front of a boy). I would always think to myself, “Gosh, I hope nothing like that ever happens to me!” While I

got through those years and young adulthood largely unscathed (OK, so I’ve had my fair share of mortifying moments in life), I did have a memorable snafu at my own wedding.

Yet that embarrassing moment is what makes me the happiest when I think back on the day.

At Jewish wedding ceremonies, both of the bride’s parents walk her down the aisle. I wasn’t nervous at all, feeling buoyed by love and enthusiasm. When I reached the end of the aisle, my parents kissed me on the cheeks and I began the hakafot, the tradition of circling the groom. As I was walking in circles, I looked up at my friends and family, some of whom were frantically motioning to me and rubbing their faces. Then I realized—when my mother had kissed me on the cheek, she had left a giant lipstick mark. But where was it? Do I stop this sacred moment for my own vanity? Trying to be subtle, I slowly brought my hand up and gently wiped my face; based on the reactions of my guests, it didn’t work.

Finally, I stopped walking. “Okay everyone, which cheek is it?” I asked loudly. Everyone laughed and there was a flutter of noise and activity as various family friends tried to help me clean off my face. “Are we good now?” I asked. Everyone nodded, and it got quiet again. “Thanks, Mom!” I announced to

laughter. Then I realized—I was supposed to circle my soon-to-be husband seven times, and I totally lost count. I circled him once or twice more and we took our place at the altar. There were other mishaps on our wedding day (fortunately, my talented wedding planner handled them beautifully), but I remember Lipstickgate most vividly. It wasn’t really a big deal, more a funny moment than something horribly mortifying. But here’s what I learned from it: You can spend months, even years, planning your wedding to the minute, but something unexpected will always happen. You can either lose it or go with the flow. I am not a go-with-the-flow type of gal, not in the least, but in that moment, I realized that I was surrounded by all the people who love me, about to marry the person I love most. I paused, took a breath, fixed the problem and laughed it off. I’m not a perfect person, and I often let my anxieties get the best of me. But on one of the most momentous days of my life, I was able to show everyone the person I want to be, the best and flawed version of myself at the same time.

I promise you, your loved ones won’t remember the snafus that took place on your wedding day. They’ll remember how you handled it and how your wedding made them feel.

BUT HERE’S WHAT I LEARNED FROM IT: YOU CAN SPEND MONTHS, EVEN YEARS, PLANNING YOUR WEDDING TO THE MINUTE, BUT SOMETHING UNEXPECTED WILL ALWAYS HAPPEN.

SAND, SEA AND FOREVER

CLOSER IN THE CARIBBEAN

JAMAICA | ANTIGUA | ST. LUCIA | THE BAHAMAS | GRENADA | BARBADOS | CURAÇAO | TURKS & CAICOS

REASONS TO CELEBRATE YOUR LOVE IN THE CARIBBEAN

Idyllic landscapes, breathtaking beaches, a thousand shades of blue, and limitless romance—there’s no better way to start your new life together. And there’s no better place for your getaway than Sandals® Resorts for adults and Beaches® Resorts for families. In the Caribbean, swimming beneath the surface together reveals depths you’ve only imagined and the adventures you share lead to deeper connections. In this guide, you’ll find our best tips for celebrating in this tropical hot spot, as well as our top picks for destinations and resorts. Dive in!

1UNFORGETTABLE DESTINATIONS

The Caribbean is made up of thousands of islands, each with its own unique charm. The hardest part is choosing just one.

Are you looking for lush forests or calm, blue ocean, soft sandy beaches or exotic cuisine? (Our resort guide inside can help you find the perfect spot.)

BARBADOS SANDALS BARBADOS

The undeniably chic Sandals Barbados is set on the white sands of a flawless beach, with awe-inspiring views at every turn. Indulge in decadent accommodations, unwind at lounges and bars with a calypso beat as the soundtrack and savor mouthwatering dining options.

ANTIGUA

SANDALS GRANDE ANTIGUA

A serene haven set on Antigua’s best beach, Dickenson Bay, this resort faces a pristine stretch of sand and unforgettable blue waters. The Caribbean Beachfront Village is a lush seaside oasis with majestic palms hovering over charming cottages at the water’s edge, while the Mediterranean Oceanview Village brings the Riviera to the Caribbean with sumptuous villas and suites.

SANDALS ROYAL BARBADOS

This retreat takes romance to whole new heights at a rooftop pool and a rooftop restaurant and bar. The glass-edge main pool blurs the line between land and sea. Strike it lucky at the bowling alley, enjoy a chill vibe at the craft beer bar or indulge in epicurean delights and sweet treats.

GRENADA

SANDALS GRENADA

Discover life with more spice at Sandals Grenada, where pools are suspended in the sky and a living room is found in a beachfront pool. Retreat to suites you can swim up to or secluded villa sanctuaries with private plunge pools. At this exotic hideaway, breathtaking scenery meets creative innovations, delivering an escape beyond extraordinary.

ST. LUCIA

SANDALS REGENCY LA TOC

At Sandals Regency La Toc, every exceptional moment comes with a spectacular view. Retreat to exclusive accommodations set high on a clifftop or at water’s edge. Hit the links at the rolling fairways of two nearby challenging golf courses. Savor extraordinary restaurants and bars that will tempt your palate. This is a place designed to naturally impress and embrace you in a state of pampered serenity.

SANDALS GRANDE ST. LUCIAN

At this picture-perfect resort on the edge of one of the island’s best beaches, you’ll revel in panoramic views at every turn. Over-the-Water Bungalows and beachfront Rondoval Suites are the resort’s most sought-after accommodations. Explore a diverse world of flavors every day and night, including the intimate Gordon’s Over-the-Water Restaurant. Love is in the air as you wind down your day setting the night ablaze beneath the stars.

SANDALS HALCYON BEACH

Tucked into ever-blooming gardens and edged by a tranquil, translucent sea, this intimate resort embodies the charm and beauty of this corner of paradise. With its brand-new beachfront suites, it is a true Garden of Eden. And with nature as its centerpiece, every elegantly appointed accommodation becomes a romantic retreat. You’ll enjoy true halcyon days thanks to creative bar concepts and palate-pleasing restaurants.

THE BAHAMAS

SANDALS EMERALD BAY

Indulge in the laid-back spirit of the Bahamian Out Islands. Here, being pampered with the ultimate service while surrounded by so much beauty defies the imagination. Sumptuously appointed villas and suites, impressive pools, exceptional restaurants, a championship golf course and a signature spa are all deliberately designed for pampering.

CURAÇAO

SANDALS ROYAL CURAÇAO

Discover a cultural crossroads with beautiful cove beaches nestled in rocky cliffs, a colorful capital and a dramatic landscape built for adventure. At this brand-new resort, a fusion of flavors seduces the palate, and a two-level main pool melts into the distant horizon. Exquisitely designed bungalow suites perched at water’s edge may be hard to leave, but with access to a Mini Cooper to explore the island, temptation abounds.

JAMAICA

SANDALS DUNN’S RIVER

Let life flow where tranquility sets the mood and worries float away on cool, gentle breezes. The one-of-a-kind accommodations bring luxury to a new level—from beachfront SkyPool Suites to the Swimup Rondovals with rooftop decks. Sustainability is at the heart of this brand-new resort where cascading waters from the heart of Dunn’s River greet you. Epicurean temptations, trend-setting bars and endless activities on land and sea make this a true paradise.

SANDALS ROYAL CARIBBEAN

Experience a place where endless amenities come with warm island hospitality. Plated perfection is found in decadent restaurants, while a private offshore island offers your choice of adventure or relaxation. Over-the-Water Villas & Bungalows—the most coveted suites in all of the Caribbean—are the romantic escape couples dream about.

SANDALS NEGRIL

With a reggae beat and carefree spirit, it’s no surprise everyone loves Sandals Negril. Its gorgeous shoreline is perfect for every water sport you can imagine. The island chic beachfront Swim-up Suites, Millionaire Suites and beachfront Loft Suites come with the exclusive services of a personal butler. And the spectacular sunsets? They’re the main event on the beach every night.

SANDALS ROYAL PLANTATION

SANDALS ROYAL BAHAMIAN

Love comes easy at Sandals Royal Bahamian, with the slower pace of island life. A private offshore island offers exotic adventures and romantic indulgences while the beach club offers the perfect escape. Every day feels wondrous in a Swim-up Suite and in the island chic accommodations found in the Island Village. Foodies and water sports enthusiasts will find their appetites sated here, while those looking to lose themselves may just forget about time altogether.

Discover the understated elegance and exquisite privacy at this boutique all-butler, all-oceanview resort. Spend your days lazing at the water’s edge with cool libations delivered by a beach butler. Take high tea on the terrace. Indulge your palate at a caviar and Champagne bar. Hit the links at Upton Estate Golf & Country Club. In a place where your every need is anticipated, get ready to be spoiled.

SANDALS OCHI

Beachsidetobluffside,thisresortofferssomethinguniquelyspecial.Get closer to the water’s edge—at a vibing beach club, tempting beachside and over-the-water restaurants, lively bars and even an over-the-water wedding chapel. You can also head to the hills and a private oasis of the most extraordinary villas with private pools or to nearby Upton Estate Golf & Country Club where green fees are complimentary. It’s two sides of paradise in one extraordinary destination.

SANDALS SOUTH COAST

Water is the inspiration for everything extraordinary at Sandals South Coast, a seaside oasis on a two-mile stretch of white-sand beach, with indulgent Over-the-Water Bungalows, beachfront Swim-up Suites and Rondoval Suites. Say “I do” at an Over-the-Water Serenity Wedding Chapel, or float on a hammock at Latitudes Overwater Bar. In a place where you can watch the sun rise and set on the same stretch of beach, you’ll discover romance at its most serene.

SANDALS MONTEGO BAY

Sandals Montego Bay captures a carefree spirit bathed in tropical beauty. It embraces its idyllic locale along the water’s edge with an Over-the-Water bar, Over-the-Water Serenity Wedding Chapel and beachfront Swim-up Suites. When the sun goes down, Sandals Montego Bay rises to the occasion with dining and entertainment worthy of celebration and romance.

BEACHES NEGRIL

Set along the widest stretch of Negril’s famed 7-Mile Beach, this resort is the very essence of a laid-back paradise, complete with beachside bars and restaurants where you can dig your toes in the sand, a water park overlooking the sea and rooms and suites that make you feel at home. It’s all about spending time with those you love, any way you want.

BEACHES OCHO RIOS

Escape to a beachfront getaway for the entire family, a tropical garden oasis lining an impossibly blue sea. Design your day around endless possibilities, from an ocean of water sports and an exhilarating water parktotherollinghillsofan18-holegolfcourse.Everypalateispampered at seven extraordinary restaurants, and sumptuous accommodations are the perfect retreat at the end of a perfect day.

TURKS & CAICOS

BEACHES TURKS & CAICOS

There are so many reasons why this resort is so popular. Amazing accommodations for families of all sizes in five magnificent villages. Mouthwatering dining experiences at 21 restaurants and a 45,000-square-foot water park. And it’s all set on a 12-mile beach lined by the bluest water you’ve ever seen, for the perfect place to capture memories.

2

ALLURING ACCOMMODATIONS

From bungalows with private pools and butler service, like the Kurason Island Poolside Butler Bungalow (above), to unique swim-up Rondovals™ with private rooftop decks for stargazing, Sandals and Beaches Resorts offer you luxurious and relaxing accommodations for your celebration.

3

WIDE RANGE OF EXPERIENCES

With breathtaking beaches and natural adventures galore, you’re spoiled for choice in the Caribbean. At Sandals and Beaches Resorts, most activities and water sports equipment are included as part of your stay, meaning you can just show up and start having fun.

ROMANCE WITH A VIEW

Your new life together starts here, in a place created to bring you closer to each other. Destination celebrations and honeymoons at Sandals and Beaches Resorts are designed to create unforgettable moments. Whether you’re dreaming of an adults-only party or a family-friendly reception, it’s possible to find exhilaration, rejuvenation and relaxation, all in the same place. And with a beginning like this, the incredible memories you’ll create together will stay with you for a lifetime. Your honeymoon starts the moment you say, “I do!”

EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO KNOW TO CREATE THE PERFECT WEDDING SOUNDTRACK.

ALL BOPS, NO SKIPS.

BY KIM FORREST PHOTOGRAPHY BY MEG LAFFEY PHOTOGRAPHY

Don’t Stop the Music

DJ, ThatPlaySong

DOMINIQUE (DOM) + DONESHIA (DJ CHAN DON)

5.25.23 | Wheaton, MD

When a top DJ gets married, a playlist that pops off is a huge priority. We scored the secrets to working with your music team, straight from a pro who’s been on both sides of the booth.

How did you go about hiring music pros for your wedding?

DJ Chan Don: For our wedding, we knew there had to be a musical element at every step. We hired a violinist for the ceremony and cocktail hour, and had a go-go band and DJ for the reception.

Some attributes to look for include: A willingness to work with all vendors

Creative ideas to make your day even more engaging Curiosity about your wedding day and who you are as a couple The ability to improvise

How did you work with your music pros during the planning process?

DJ Chan Don: I made sure we had a phone call with each pro to discuss how we wanted their performance to feel. It was super important to have one AV vendor that supplied the audio from beginning to end. Ours, New Wave Audio, attended every call with the musicians to get their AV needs. We wanted the wedding day to build up to a big party.

Given your experience, were you more hands-on or hands-off with the music for your wedding?

What advice would you give couples for working with their music pros?

DJ Chan Don: Never underestimate the details. Here are some inside tips: Give your DJ essential info, like important shout-outs throughout the night, your wedding party’s favorite songs, a “do not play list” and so forth.

Keep the speeches short. Having too many speeches really slows things down.

Make sure your videographer uses the sound from your AV mic.

Never assume the DJ is also a master of ceremonies (MC). Ask. Ask your DJ if they take requests. It can be overwhelming for music pros to manage guest expectations.

Love Blooms

“The theme of our wedding was a garden oasis,” says Dom (right), a firefighter/EMT. “Flowers have been our love language from the beginning of our relationship.”

DJ Chan Don: I knew I would DJ during the reception, but I was pretty hands-off with the music for the rest of the evening. I hired a really good DJ friend, Alex Love. I provided a list of songs I knew I wanted to play and also asked our wedding party to share five or six that they would want to hear. It is so important to provide a “do not play” list. If you aren’t familiar with the DJ, ask to hear a mix of their music.

Meet-Cute

The couple first met through a mutual friend at a concert in Washington, DC. A few weeks later, Dom came to see Don DJing at a DC lounge and the rest, as they say, is history.

THE PROS WHO MADE IT HAPPEN:

Ceremony Music: Crystal Hart

DJs: Alex Love & DJ Chan Don

MC: Myrtis Thweatt

Go-Go Band: New Impressionz

Venue: Brookside Gardens

Photography: Meg Laffey

Videography: Matthew McNair

Event Planning + Design: The Otherside Creatives

Floral Design: Wander + Whimsy

What were some of the most memorable music moments at your wedding?

DJ Chan Don: Blending our musical references was really important to us and made for some special moments. With me being from the South (Alabama) and Dominique from the DC area, we wanted to incorporate both music genres of Southern rap and go-go into our day.

Dom: I’m from DC, and go-go has been a huge part of my life and culture. The New Impressionz go-go band’s performance was my favorite musical moment.

DJ Chan Don: Mine was my DJ set. It was amazing to DJ in front of our biggest supporters. Most of my family members live across the US and don’t often see me perform. It felt like such an accomplishment to see everyone have fun.

What’s your advice for choosing a wedding playlist?

DJ Chan Don: We share a playlist on Apple Music, so in the months leading up to the wedding, we would add songs individually. Then we went through the playlist to see what we would stick with and provided that to our DJ. That gave her a sense of the vibe we wanted for the ceremony, cocktail hour, reception. You don’t want to pick every song for your wedding day. Give the DJ some space to work their magic.

OFFICIANT: NIJEAN KENNEDY

DOM’S ATTIRE: ZURI CUDJOE

DON’S ATTIRE: LOVE BY ENZOANI FROM MARI MI BRIDAL, PHILADELPHIA; CLIO PEPPIATT

HAIR: DON: TIARA WINGHAM; DOM: TWO STRAND SALON

MAKEUP: EVA GUY-REED

RENTALS: 27 STUDIOS; BBJ LA TAVOLA; NEW WAVE AUDIO; WHITE GLOVE RENTALS

CATERING: CHEF MORGAN JAMES

BAR SERVICES: SIX STREET EATS

TYPEWRITER POETRY: HAIKUISTS

TRANSPORTATION: PARTY IN MOTION

DON AND DOM’S TOP 5

“Saturday Love,”

by Cherrelle

with Alexander O’Neal

“Cozy,”

by Beyoncé

“If You Want To,” by

Alexandria

“Search & Rescue,” by

Drake

“Love Ballad,” by L.T.D.

What are some ways couples can personalize their wedding music?

DJ Chan Don: Go with the songs that bring up the best memories! Memories from when you were in college, concerts you’ve attended together or songs that your families played. There are so many options to pull from.

Looking back, what was the highlight of the day?

DJ Chan Don: DJing and MC’ing together was probably the highlight. We play off each other’s energy really well and that was the moment our reception turned into a party. Our passion for each other and goal of having fun really shined through.

The Songs That Shape Your Wedding

When it comes to choosing the specific songs for your wedding, we recommend letting your DJ or bandleader take the lead (they’re the experts, after all). But there are a few musical moments that you’ll want to select (or suggest) yourself to set the tone for the day. We asked top music pros from around the country to share their best advice.

Processional

THE PRO: Moses Lin, Destination Wedding Guitarist

@MosesLinMusic | BASED IN: Orange County, CA

“My personal opinion is that the best processional song is one that will make you feel the most emotion on your wedding day.”

TOP

Recessional

THE PRO: Rob Perkins of On The Beat Music Agency

@OntheBeatMusicAgency | BASED IN: Los Angeles

“The spirit of the recessional song has to organically match the couple and who they are to each other and their guests. The song itself also needs to be consistent in its energy.”

TOP 5: 1. “This Will Be (An Everlasting Love),” by Natalie Cole 2. “Signed, Sealed, Delivered (I’m Yours),” by Stevie Wonder 3. “Happy,” by Pharrell Williams 4. “Celebration,” by Kool & The Gang 5. “We Are Family,” by

DO NOT PLAY LIST

Reception Grand Entrance

THE PRO: Tessa Young of Prism DJs

@PrismDJs

BASED IN: Los Angeles

“A good reception entrance song can range from chill vibes to mid-tempo to high energy. More couples have been choosing two songs for the entrance: one for the wedding party and one for the newlyweds.”

TOP 5:

1. “Edamame,” by bbno$ feat. Rich Brian

2. “Sledgehammer,” by Peter Gabriel

3. “Canned Heat,” by Jamiroquai

4. “Cuff It,” by Beyoncé

5. “Jumpin,” by Pitbull & Lil Jon

You might be focusing on your must-play songs, but take a minute to create a “do not play” list too. Of course, songs with potentially offensive or explicit lyrics are red flags, but so are tracks with lyrics that don’t match the celebratory and romantic feeling of your wedding. Here are a few tunes that don’t pass the vibe check:

“Stay With Me,”

by Sam Smith

“My Heart Will Go On,” by

Celine Dion

“I Will Always Love You,” by Dolly Parton

“God Only Knows,” by The Beach

Boys

Police

“Every Breath You Take,” by The

5: 1. “A Thousand Years,” by Christina Perri 2. “Can’t Help Falling in Love,” by Elvis Presley 3. “Marry Me,” by Train 4. “Here Comes the Sun,” by The Beatles 5. “Perfect,” by Ed Sheeran

Sister Sledge

TOP 10 FIRST DANCE SONGS

If you’re struggling to find a first dance song, these are the most popular tracks in the country, according to The Knot Real Wedding Study.

“Perfect,” by Ed Sheeran*

“Can’t Help Falling in Love,” by Elvis Presley

“Joy of My Life,” by Chris

Stapleton

“Growing Old With You,” by Restless Road

“Lover,” by Taylor Swift

“At Last,” by Etta James

“Better Together,” by Luke Combs

“I Get to Love You,” by Ruelle

“All of Me,” by John Legend

“Beyond,” by Leon Bridges

* #1 since 2017!

First Dance

THE PRO: Keanna O’Quinn of Sonic Sommelier

@SonicSommelier | BASED IN: New York City and Los Angeles

“The most memorable first dance songs are always the ones that resonate with the couple and their love story. So, when thinking about the tempo of your first dance, consider how you and your partner naturally want to move and go with what feels comfortable and authentic.”

Parent Dances

THE PRO: DJ Brian B | @DJBrianBOfficial | BASED IN: New York City

“Parent dances are all about the photo ops. Unless you two are big dancers or have a significant song, don’t obsess over the selection. Lean on your music pro for recommendations that symbolize your relationship with your parent figure best. I also wouldn’t suggest dancing the entire length of the song. Between two and two-and-a-half minutes will allow you to get all the photo ops you’ll need.”

Reception Songs

THE PRO:

Kurt Titchenell of BVTLive!

@BVTLive

BASED IN: Chadds Ford, PA

“It’s important to have a surefire dancefloor-filling song to get the party moving after guests have dessert. High-energy songs work best—the tempos tend to be about 120 beats per minute. We’re always reading the crowd and minimizing lulls.”

TOP 5:

To listen to these and more of our favorite tracks, check out our ultimate wedding playlist on Spotify.

1. “Hold My Hand,” by Jess Glynne

2. “Electricity,” by Silk City with Dua Lipa

3. “Mr. Brightside,” by The Killers

4. “Love Story,” by Taylor Swift

5. “I Wanna Dance With Somebody (Who Loves Me),” by Whitney Houston

Last Dance

THE PRO: Kara Ford AKA DJ Kara

@DJ.Kara

BASED IN: Los Angeles

“The best last dance songs are mid-tempo songs that you can sing along to. Something that’s a classic that many of your guests will know the words to, but also something that is not too fast or too slow, so everyone can come together and groove easily on the dance floor.”

TOP 5:

1. “Love on Top,” by Beyoncé

2. “Dancing in the Moonlight,” by Toploader

3. “Hold on, We’re Going Home,” by Drake

4. “Africa,” by Toto

5. “Higher Love,” by Kygo and Whitney Houston

TOP 5: 1. “Cherish the Day,” by Robert Glasper feat. Lalah Hathaway 2. “Say a Little Prayer,” by Aretha Franklin 3. “Kiss of Life,” by Sade 4. “Wish I Knew You,” by The Revivalists 5. “Lovesong,” by Adele

TOP 5: 1. “I Loved Her First,” by Heartland 2. “I Hope You Dance,” by Lee Ann Womack 3. “It Won’t Be Like This for Long,” by Darius Rucker 4. “Humble and Kind,” by Tim McGraw 5. “One Call Away,” by Charlie Puth

A Guide to Making the Best Wedding Toast

Delivering a killer toast is a nerve-racking task, especially after two glasses of bubbly. Don’t fret: These fill-in-the-blank templates will save the day.

BY CHAPELLE JOHNSON

Toast From a Parent:

LET’S BE HONEST. YOU’RE THE PARENT OF THE NEWLYWED, SO YOU’LL HAVE EVERYONE IN TEARS EVEN BEFORE YOU IMPART THESE WELL-WISHES.

has always been , and I’ve for that. would go into every , class project or job interview with such and it used to me and question where got it from. But looking at smile today while next to has made me realize what it was all for. , just know that will never stop doing everything possible to show their for you because their heart won’t let them. Cheers to the newlyweds. I hope your for one another deepens with each passing day.

CHILD’S

Toast From the Couple:

SENTIMENTS

OF YOUR OWN.

[YOUR PARTNER’S NAME] [EMOTION] [VERB]

[TIME OF DAY] [EMOTION] [EMOTION]

Secret Sauce

Weddings of the World

HERITAGE

THERE ARE A MYRIAD OF WAYS TO SAY “I DO” WHILE ALSO HONORING YOUR HERITAGE. DIVE INTO NINE TRADITIONS AS YOU CONSIDER HOW TO INCORPORATE CULTURE INTO YOUR WEDDING.

BY HANNAH NOWACK ILLUSTRATIONS BY AURÉLIA DURAND

BY HANNAH ILLUSTRATIONS BY DURAND

Weddings are a fresh beginning, but for many couples, they’re also a chance to reminisce and reflect. To look upon their heritage and those who raised them. To honor the cultural traditions and rituals of weddings spanning generations. How beautiful is that? What’s even more spectacular is how varied and unique wedding traditions are across cultures and religions. To celebrate that diversity, we explore several wedding traditions from around the world.

are a fresh but for many also a chance to reminisce and reflect To look upon their and those who raised them To honor the cultural traditions and rituals of How beautiful is that? What’s even more is how varied and traditions are across cultures and religions To celebrate that we several traditions from around the world

Discover more of our favorite traditions celebrated around the world.

is

a Korean

Pyebaek is a Korean wedding tradition that celebrates the newlyweds’ growing family.

The pyebaek is a ceremony in traditional Korean weddings that centers around wellwishes for the couple’s future family. The ceremony takes place at a low table set with anju (snacks). The couple, seated across from their parents, then serves anju with tea or soju (Korean wine) to their elders. The parents offer blessings and wisdom in return, as well as an envelope of money. As a final gesture, they throw dates and chestnuts at the couple, who catch them on fabric that’s part of the bride’s dress. The chestnuts represent future daughters and the dates

“Pyebaek originated as a postwedding ceremony to facilitate a newlywed’s introduction to their in-laws. Modern Korean weddings often incorporate pyebaek as part of entertainment amid a more Westernized celebration, usually during cocktail hour. While this tradition isn’t practiced as frequently as it once was, it is still a fun ritual to consider.”

—Bo Shim, Photographer @BoShimPhoto

Guide to Going Global

Keep this checklist in mind as you decide which traditions to incorporate.

“The tea ceremony is one of the biggest components in a traditional Chinese wedding. Once this is done, it is a sign of marriage in the eyes of Chinese tradition. It’s a ceremony where tea is served to the elders…and a chance for [family members] to impart well-wishes and advice to the to-be-weds.”

—Steph G. Bishop, Photographer @StephGBishop

Traditional Chinese weddings include cha dao, a tea ceremony to show elders respect.

include cha a tea ceremony to show elders respect.

• Ask family members about traditions that celebrate your heritage.

• Discuss your partner’s heritage and how you can blend and honor both backgrounds.

a tea ceremony, which dates all the way back to the in China to 907 was created to show for the couple’s families. ancient Chinese ceremonies, the would stand at the where would pay to heaven and the

The time-honored tradition of a wedding tea ceremony, which dates all the way back to the Tang dynasty in China (618 to 907 AD), was created to show respect for the couple’s families. During ancient Chinese wedding ceremonies, the couple would stand at the family altar, where they would pay homage to heaven and earth, the family ancestors and the kitchen god, Tsao-Chün. Tea, usually with two lotus seeds or two red dates in each cup, would be offered first to the couple’s parents, then grandparents onto aunts and uncles and elder cousins. This practice was then followed by the distribution of lucky red envelopes (called hong bao in Mandarin or lai see in Cantonese), filled with money or jewelry for the newlyweds. This was considered the families’ formal introduction.

• Consider whether you want an interactive tradition (such as a unity ritual) or details like meaningful clothing or decor.

• Ask yourself, “Am I incorporating this because it feels authentic to me, or just because I feel like I am supposed to?”

• Don’t be afraid to adapt or modify traditions to better reflect your partnership and priorities.

represent sons

Mehndi is a prewedding celebration in South Asian cultures where decorative henna designs are applied to the body.

Historically, the application of intricate henna patterns to hands and feet was just for the bride and her loved ones. Modern couples, however, are extending the invitation to the entire wedding party, regardless of gender. Used since the Bronze Age as decoration and skin protectant, henna also has proven anti-inflammatory benefits. The cooling effect it creates on a person’s hands and feet is said to help relieve stress and headaches. To aid with the stress relief, newlyweds are encouraged to avoid housework for as long as the stain stays on their hands.

“Mehndi, also known as henna, has deep-seated cultural significance in South Asian weddings, tracing its roots back to traditional practices where alta, a red dye, was used by women to adorn their hands and feet. Over time, alta was replaced by mehndi in many cultures, while some still uphold the traditional usage. The application of mehndi serves several symbolic purposes: It is regarded as a sign of ‘suhaag,’ implying a blissful married life, and is emblematic of vibrance, fertility and the attraction of positivity. Traditionally, brides would have mehndi applied to their hands and feet a day before their wedding, though in contemporary practice, it is often applied two to four days prior to facilitate the darkest possible stain. This shift doesn’t undermine the tradition, as it is purely for aesthetics. Folklore often connects the darkness of the mehndi stain to the depth of the groom’s love for the bride, adding an element of romance and mystique. Furthermore, the intricate designs often contain the groom’s name, providing an entertaining exercise for the groom to locate his name, thereby serving as an icebreaker in arranged marriages. With its cooling properties, mehndi is also believed to help reduce a bride’s stress as she embarks on her new journey, solidifying its importance in South Asian wedding traditions.”

—Jessie Khaira, Wedding Planner @JessieKhaira

“A few German traditions have been passed on over the years, the most difficult of which is cutting a log. In performing this task, the couple will need to show how well they communicate and can work together.”

At traditional German weddings, couples are encouraged to put their vows to the test right away with a challenge in teamwork that involves sawing a log using a two-person saw. The bonding ritual acts as a reminder that couples can overcome obstacles when working together and is a physical representation of the vows they made to one another. What better way to solidify your partnership than proving that you can work together and break a sweat together?

—Barbara Schwarck, Officiant MyHappyDay.net

Following the wedding ceremony, German newlyweds must face their first challenge as a married couple: sawing a wooden log in half.

Persian wedding ceremonies

materials that carry beautiful symbolism.

“The most notable tradition in a Persian wedding ceremony is the sofreh aghd, where the couple sits in front of a decorative spread that represents a symbolic connection between them and their families.”

—Sarah Kazemburg, Wedding and Event Planner

@SarahKazemburgEvents

Each element included in the Persian wedding spread represents a facet of the couple’s relationship and family. Fruit symbolizes the couple’s commitment to sustaining each other, decorative eggs and nuts symbolize fertility, a mirror nods to the brightness in the couple’s future, and incense and candles represent purification. The table also features rose water to perfume the air; sugar cones, pastries and rock candy for sweetness in the couple’s marriage; herbs to protect against the evil eye; and flatbread and gold coins for prosperity. Lastly, it includes a needle and thread for unity and a cloth to represent prior generations. Each element is a reminder of the multifaceted nature of relationships and the depth of the couple’s commitment to each other.

Aso-ebi, which translates to “family clothes,” are a major aspect of Nigerian wedding attire. As part of their aso-ebi, which includes a colorful kaftan-like wedding dress, Nigerian brides will usually also don gele, a headpiece or head tie made of fabric matching the wedding dress.

“The lasso ceremony represents the union of two people. It also signifies divine protection in the face of life’s difficulties. Not only are the couple’s sponsors (godparents) usually involved, but they’re generally also the people responsible for providing the lasso. They will present it to the nearlynewlyweds as a wedding present.”

—Angelina Cardenas, Wedding and Event Planner

@AngelinaCardenasEvents

Within the Catholic Church, the wedding lasso tradition is a unity ceremony in which the couple is joined together by a lasso, rope, rosary or cord. While the lasso tradition is steeped in ancient Catholic faith, Christian and even nonreligious couples in Spain and Latin America also choose to incorporate it into their wedding because of its symbolism. During the ceremony and shortly after the couple recites their wedding vows, the couple’s los padrinos y madrinas (wedding sponsors or godparents) place the lasso around their shoulders. This symbolizes their joining together as one unit.

term as well Wearing aso-ebi on the means you some of the best seats in the because

“Aso-ebi is a particular fabric and color that the families of the bride and groom coordinate to wear on the wedding day to visually set them apart from others. The wedding entourage that dances when introducing the bride and groom have their own matching aso-ebi outfits as well. Aso means cloth or fabric and ebi means family. The phrase is Yoruba, but Igbo, Hausa and other Nigerian cultures use the term as well. Wearing aso-ebi on the wedding day means you get some of the best seats in the house, because you are considered a close family member or friend. Gele is an ornate yet refined headpiece created from aso oke or sego fabric that women wear. Yoruba brides typically wear geles in the style of their choosing, while Igbo brides wear either a gele or coral beads in their hair.”

—Bisola Esiemokhai, Wedding and Event Planner

@EventDesignbyBE

traditionally feature a table, known as sofreh aghd, elaborately laid with

The lasso ceremony is a unity ritual traditionally included as part of Latino and Filipino Catholic wedding ceremonies.

Wedding attire is a big part of any wedding, no matter the culture, and this is especially true of Nigerian weddings, where aso-ebi and gele are traditionally worn.

“Jumping the broom is an African tradition created during the days of slavery. It not only symbolizes the sweeping away of evil, past loves and the old you, but it also represents jumping into a new life together and setting up your household. To help guests understand your cultural traditions, I highly suggest offering a program that explains the ritual. I also suggest asking the celebrant to explain the tradition while performing the wedding ceremony. Many times, the broom might be an heirloom

passed down through the family; there are also companies that specialize in creating ornate brooms. The jumping broom is not your ordinary kitchen variety used to sweep floors. Elaborately decorated with flowers, ribbon and sometimes cowrie shells, which symbolize wealth and fertility, the broom is then displayed in the married couple’s home to remind them of their commitment.”

—Desireé Dent, Wedding Planner @DejanaeEvents

This tradition’s history is both fraught and disputed. Some say it dates back to Wales in the 1700s, when the Roma community practiced broomstick weddings. Another theory is that the practice originated in West Africa as a means of cleansing the marriage ceremony of evil spirits. Though it’s unclear which region began the practice, most people identify it with African Americans in the antebellum South. Many enslaved people practiced broom-jumping to symbolize their union, since they didn’t have the legal right to marry. Today, the practice continues at many African American weddings to pay tribute to the struggles of their ancestors. It also celebrates Black love and reclaims ownership of a ritual that has its origin in oppression. As with many other wedding rituals, couples should only include the tradition if they understand its meaning and significance.

Nothing says “Jewish wedding” more than the sound of breaking glass. But what’s the point? Depending on the perspective, the breaking of the wineglass is, among other things: a symbol of the destruction of the Temple in Jerusalem, a representation of the fragility of human relationships and a reminder that marriage changes the lives of individuals forever. It is thought to have originated around the time of the destruction of the second temple in 70 AD, as one of the meanings behind it is closely linked to the sorrow of that event. However, some sources say that the tradition predates that. It’s also the official signal to shout, “Mazel tov!” and start partying. The tradition itself is practiced by stomping on a glass, shattering it beyond repair. The ritual happens at the end of the wedding ceremony, right before the couple kisses. While it used to be the groom’s responsibility, now both partners commonly ensure the glass is broken. If you’re game, you can break the glass together with one swift stomp in unison.

“The breaking of the glass is a tradition that symbolizes the fragility of relationships. We are reminded that holiness and beauty were created under the chuppah (wedding canopy) as we joined these two families into one. Now, when the couple re-enters the world as lifelong partners, they will have to do the work to maintain their relationship on a dayto-day basis, despite the brokenness of the world around us. So that the couple remains whole, we break something else.”

—Rabbi Elyssa Cherney, Officiant @TacklingTorah

For many Black and African American couples, jumping the broom serves as the culmination of the ceremony and solidifies their union.

Many Jewish weddings culminate with the breaking of the glass ritual and a joyous chorus of “Mazel tov!”

Modern relationships and online dating seem to come with their own language—and your vocab lesson is now officially in session. It’s time to study up on Gen Z’s new favorite relationship terms, from A to, well, Z.

breadcrumbing

—verb, the act of providing a partner with just enough affection to keep their attention, while never moving the relationship forward

cushioning

—verb, when someone seeks other potential partners to keep their options open while in a committed relationship

DINK

—acronym, dual income no kids; a lifestyle categorized by a couple sharing two streams of income and no children

dry dating

—noun, the practice of abstaining from alcohol during dates

DTR

—acronym, define the relationship; the moment when one is asked to do so

enmeshment

—noun, a relationship in which the partners and their lives have become so intertwined that boundaries are ignored or blurred

fexting

—verb, to fight with a partner over text message, reportedly coined by First Lady Jill Biden

groundhogging

—verb, when one pursues relationships with the same type of person with the expectation of different results

kittenfishing

—verb, when one misrepresents themselves on dating apps with smaller lies than the more overt catfishing; ex. adding an inch or two to your height or using old photos

love bombing

—verb, the emotionally abusive behavior of showering a partner with excessive flattery and/or gifts for the purpose of manipulation

TERMINOLOGY

pocketing

—verb, a verbal or nonverbal refusal to introduce a partner to family and friends or share photos of them on social media

roommate syndrome

—noun, when a romantic relationship begins to feel platonic once cohabitation begins

situation-

ship

—noun, a romantic or sexual relationship that remains undefined

soft launch

—noun, when you subtly reveal that you’re in a relationship through the sharing of slightly obscured photos of your partner on social media

Scan to learn more lingo, including the terms below.

Benching Cuffing Freckling

Slow Fade

Beige Flags

soul tie

—noun, a deep emotional bond and spiritual connection between two people

stonewalling

—verb, 1. when one partner in a relationship is emotionally inaccessible to the other; 2. the act of withdrawing from conflict and refusing to communicate

twin flame

—noun, 1. an intense soul connection, not necessarily romantic in nature, based on the concept of one soul being split into two bodies; 2. a type of soul tie

The Lovers’ Lexicon

BECAUSE RELATIONSHIPS SHOULD REALLY COME WITH THEIR OWN DICTIONARY.

BY JAMIE CUCCINELLI

Mating rituals differ across the Animal Kingdom. In arid and dusty regions, the strong and lowly male dung beetle pushes its pile of excrement through vast distances as the female rolls along for the ride. In parts of Namibia and Botswana, the sociable weaver bird constructs large nests to impress a potential mate. Some animals dance (ducks) and others display bright colors (peacocks) to attract a desired partner. Humans arguably have a significantly longer and labyrinthine list of qualifications for a mate, but we deduce physical attraction through the chemistry of scent and touch—and that includes kissing.

Only a few species kiss romantically, including the bonobo ape and chimps. Why we kiss likely has to do with how we were genetically encoded after humans adopted the behavior. For example, when we consume sugar, the chemical hormone dopamine (found in the pleasure portion of the brain) is released; kissing releases that same hormone, as well as a cocktail of chemical responses like oxytocin and serotonin. It turns out that the indulgences of sugar and kissing aren’t so far apart. However, the reasons why we kiss are slightly more nuanced than why we consume sweets.

Kissing between romantic partners is inherently a physical connection for humans. It also signals other biological needs. “In addition to feeling good physically, intimate kissing is related to sexual arousal, attraction and bonding—or the lack thereof, if the kiss is less than ideal,” says clinical psychologist Cortney Warren, PhD. “In fact, kissing is part of maintaining a bonded and attached romantic connection in most long-term relationships.”

A 2020 study involving 1,605 participants across committed, long-term relationships made an interesting discovery, says Warren. “The more frequently people kissed, the more they positively experienced sex with their partner (including general levels of interest and arousal, orgasm and eventspecific sexual satisfaction). In addition, kissing frequency is

also associated with increased relationship satisfaction with their mate.”

Hugging and kissing are among the first biological behaviors young teens experience with courtship rituals. According to 2019 research, the average age of a first romantic kiss is 15, and 90 percent of respondents recalled their first kisses with vivid detail. The behavior adds a layer of selectivity to the mating process.

Kissing also plays a large role in spotlighting the emotional connection between partners. Warren refers to a 2020 study of 691 adults where people described the best kisses as those that sparked emotions like passion, love and surprise. The worst kisses, however, were devoid of passion or simply unpleasant (we’ll leave that to your imagination). “Overall, four primary themes in people’s descriptions of kissing emerged,” says Warren. “They include physical components (how good it felt), connection to a partner (who they were kissing), the context for kissing (how and when they were kissing), and emotions provoked during a kiss. Overall, the quality of a kiss is important to maintaining an attraction to a partner. In this sample, about 44 percent lost romantic or sexual interest in a person because of a less-than-ideal kissing experience.”

The timing of kissing further relays information biologically and emotionally. “The question of when we kiss adds another layer to the mix. There is also some research on sex differences in when people want to kiss,” says Warren. She points to a 2011 study of that found that men were more likely to initiate kissing before having sex, while women were more likely to do it afterward when in long-term relationships. Both groups reported that kissing is more important before sex than after. She adds, “Cuddling and love-professing speech was more important after sex as part of bonding.”

The exact inception of kissing remains dubious, but the practice has been around for at least 3,500 years. Anthropologist Vaughn Bryant, a professor at Texas A&M, traced

Why do we kiss? According to science, lip-locking romantically is the result of biological desire and psychological attraction.

BY ESTHER LEE

STOCKSY

the earliest documentation of humans making out to the Vedic Sanskrit texts of the Mahabharata, circa 1500 BC. Findings published in a 2023 review paper revealed lip kissing goes back even further, to 2500 BC, as it was practiced in ancient Mesopotamia and Egypt.

One argument says kissing originated out of biological need. Much like how birds and other wildlife choose mouth-to-mouth feeding techniques, kissing could be a mating ritual with a survival purpose. How it spread remains a mystery.

Bryant has argued that the act of kissing only expanded to Europe once Alexander the Great conquered India’s Punjab region in 326 BC and observed locals kissing. Unfortunately, the spread of kissing was directly correlated to the rise of diseases, such as the herpes type 1 virus. Hundreds of years later, Roman Emperor Tiberius unsuccessfully attempted to ban the practice due to its epidemic link. More recently, the winners of the 2015 Ig Nobel medicine prize (a satirical prize that recognizes actual scientific findings) found that intense kissing could involve perks like decreasing skin allergies.

Overall, humans have a primal need for physical interaction, says Warren. “Recognizing that all of us need touch and connection is a good starting point,” she notes. “Making an effort to be affectionate and touch those we love (in sexual and nonsexual ways as is appropriate) is part of how we show care, connection and intimacy.” She recommends that people put down electronics over meals and when they’re with loved ones, so it’s easier to be fully present.

But physical touch isn’t limited to partners. It’s important for all of us. Touch between friends, family and community members (like hugs or handshakes) is linked to a slew of health benefits. “Emerging neurobiological research suggests that physical touch releases oxytocin in the body,” says Warren. “Oxytocin has anti-stress effects on the body, such as reducing blood pressure and cortisol (the stress hormone) levels and promoting growth and healing.” Touch is one of the easiest ways to release oxytocin. In a TED talk, neuroscientist Paul Zak argued that people who get at least eight hugs a day feel happier and more connected to others than those without such contact. Increasing oxytocin and decreasing cortisol levels reduce stress. It’s no wonder kissing feels so good!

A significant amount of research reveals the impact of touch on our mental and physical well-being, from infancy well into adulthood. “Physical touch and love from an adult caregiver are critical for healthy emotional and physical development, starting in infancy,” explains Warren. In the 1940s, Austrian psychoanalyst René Spitz conducted research in Romanian orphanages that showed that children who weren’t touched (held, caressed, rocked) had major developmental problems later on, even if they had food, water and shelter.

“Physical touch in adult relationships, which doesn’t need to be sexual, helps us feel socially bonded and connected to others,” Warren concludes. In essence, touch enhances our lives and romantic kissing is an extension of this basic human need.

Meet Our Expert

Dr. Cortney Warren, PhD, is a board-certified clinical psychologist and the author of the new book, Letting Go of Your Ex (2023). A version of this article first appeared on TheKnot.com.

Kiss & Tell

BY LAUREN WHALLEY

1. Anastasia Beverly Hills Matte Lipstick in Sugar Plum

“This moody hue made me feel so vampy and sensual. It applies smoothly and remains comfortable without excessive flaking or drying.”

—Jamie Cuccinelli, Senior Editor, Sex & Relationships

2. Fenty Beauty Stunna Lip Paint

Longwear Fluid Lip Color in Uncuffed

“This lip paint has completely changed my opinion of matte lipstick, which I’ve historically found to be too sticky and drying. Fenty’s is light and moisturizing, delivering a natural finish and smooth texture.”

—Emily Rumsey, Assistant Commerce Updates Editor

3. Honest Beauty Liquid Lipstick in BFF

“I love the texture and even application of the formula. The finish is matte, but it still feels smooth and creamy.”

—Samantha Iacia, Editor

4. Pat McGrath Labs LiquiLUST Legendary Wear Matte Lipstick in Elson 4

“This liquid lipstick

You want your lips to look their best through all of the sips, bites, smiles and smooches on your wedding day. We did the work for you and challenged our editors to pucker up and test some of the most popular lip colors known for giving a party-proof pout (including a few bonus options).

Rosso Valentino Refillable Lipstick in 22R

applies like a gloss, yet dries instantly. It isn’t like other matte lip products I’ve tried.”

—Sarah Hanlon, Entertainment & Celebrity Editor

5. Lancôme Paris L’Absolu Rogue Cream Lipstick in 397 Berry Noir

“This product will push me to include lipstick in my makeup routine. I loved how juicy and colorful my lips looked even after it slowly wore off throughout the day.”

—Chapelle Johnson, Assistant Editor

6.

ing prep work) and gobsmacked by the precision.”

—Nicole Taliaferro, Fashion Content Strategist

7. Rosso Valentino Refillable Lipstick in 22R “With only a few touch-ups and light blots, the pigment lasted from my morning walk with the puppy through dinner—totaling over 16 hours. It’s refillable too. I liken the experience of applying this prestige lipstick to swiping a weighted credit card: It’s luxury.”

most about this classic lipstick. It’s the perfect nude that you can build on with increased applications. It glides on matte but plays well with a gloss if you want a hint of shine.”

—Lauren Kay, Executive Editor

Chanel Rouge Coco Baume in 928 Pink Delight

“This lipstick packs serious color that lasts. I was impressed by how smoothly the cream formula applied (AKA cutting down on moisturiz-

—Esther Lee, Deputy Editor

Charlotte Tilbury Matte Revolution Lipstick in Pillow Talk

“The color, full stop, is what I love

“This isn’t your everyday wedding lipstick; it’s a balm formula that applies like butter. (Psst: If you’re looking for intense pigment, this may not be for you.)”

—Lauren Whalley, Fashion Editor, Beauty & Inclusivity

Saie Lip Blur in Modern “This just might be the most perfect shade of pink. I also love that it glides on smoothly and feels lightweight, as it’s made with moisturizing ingredients.”

—Sofia Deeb, Assistant Fashion Commerce Editor

Armani Beauty Lip Power Longwear Satin Lipstick in 107 Sensual

PUCKER UP BUTTERCUP

BY JAMIE CUCCINELLI

While sharing a smooch in front of all your family and friends (gulp) is bound to drum up some anxiety, a looks-killer-on-camera kiss comes down to some prep work.

Keep It PG

Locking lips in front of grandma? It sounds like a recipe for awkward no matter how you slice it. But you can avoid any pearl-clutching from more conservative guests by keeping the kiss PG. Save the tongue action for the honeymoon, y’all.

Practice Makes

(Close to) Perfect

Just like how your first dance could benefit from some practice in the living room, so can your first kiss. We know, we know: You two obviously have things down pat by now—but this is a capital-B big moment, so a run-through is always a good idea. (And we’re sure your partner won’t have any complaints…)

Figure Out the Hand Situation

Ahh, the age-old question of “What do I do with my hands?!” Discuss hand placement with your partner and figure out what feels most natural, whether it’s holding hands or resting one on their waist or chest.

Avoid Photobombers

During your rehearsal, politely ask your officiant to hop out of frame on the big

Read My Lips

day. Sure, they’re the one who’ll give you the go-ahead to get to smooching—but you probably don’t want them as the starring photobomber in the pics.

Hold It!

Even if you can barely wait another moment to hit the reception, give your photographer time to capture the kiss. Try holding the lip-lock for a count of three to ensure adequate time to nail the shot. Besides, why would you ever want to rush this?

No Surprises

While good wedding-day surprises can exist in the form of after-party snacks or heartfelt gifts, keep them out of the first kiss. (An impromptu dip can throw someone off balance if they’re already teetering in heels!)

Take in the Moment

Though practice can go a long way in shedding nerves and sharing a picture-perfect kiss, try not to get too caught up in the optics of it all. Remember: This is your first kiss as newlyweds! Focus on taking in the intimacy and emotion of the moment. If you’re authentic to yourselves, stunning photos are a given.

An expert did just that—read our lip prints. Here’s what she deduced.

Esther

Lee, Deputy Editor

Your analytical skills

fit perfectly into your emotional skills, but you run yourself ragged.

I beg you, please be kinder to yourself. I see great things for you.

Lauren Kay, Executive Editor

You are someone with an enormously big heart. Your emotions fuel your analytical skills.

You’ve been putting so much energy into everything you do.

Emily Rumsey, Assistant Commerce Updates Editor

You’re constantly seeking to increase your analytical skills and always trying to learn more. Keep up with the self-care and learning.

Chapelle Johnson, Assistant Editor

You seem absolutely unflappable. What people don’t realize is that under that calm, stoic exterior is a rock who’s able to deeply feel what others go through.

Jamie Cuccinelli, Senior Editor, Sex & Relationships

You take on everything and anything, and you rule with your analytical side. You are so extremely organized.

2023 RESEARCH FOUND THAT THE ACT OF KISSING GOES AS FAR BACK AS 2500 BC, WHEN IT WAS PRACTICED IN ANCIENT MESOPOTAMIA AND EGYPT. (THAT’S MORE THAN 4,500 YEARS OF SMOOCHING!)

Kiss Me!

1. Follow your instincts with these instructions.

2. Read the analysis after you complete the exercise.

Kiss Print Steps: Cut out this insert

Apply a creamy pigmented lipstick

Press your lips against the card (no right or wrong way) Your partner goes next Notice what is most defined on the card Observe where the lip print is more fully formed

Compare your print with your partner’s Where are your prints in relation to each other? Which is bigger? More defined?

About the Expert Jan Levie is the CEO and creative director of Handy Entertainment, an Atlanta-based experiential events company that offers lip readings and other entertainment options for the wedding day.

PARTNER’S KISS

Self-Analysis

The upper lip represents the emotional side of yourself. The lower lip typically represents your analytical side.

If both lips are symmetrical, you’re currently well-balanced and even-keeled.

If your lips are grooved, you may need to focus more on hydration.

If the lines on your lips are balanced, you are the type to be organized and structured in your routine.

Super-full lips mean you’re leaning into planning and your relationship. Your heart is generous.

A smaller lip print may mean you tend to be on the shyer side. Be bold when celebrating.

Lip prints can easily change. Where you are today isn’t where you’ll be tomorrow.

Nicole Taliaferro, Fashion Content Strategist

You are an avid researcher, and everything you do is really full of your analytical abilities and emotional intelligence.

Samantha Iacia, Editor

Everybody knows you to be someone who’s very thoughtful and a bit quiet. You have an amazingly balanced, analytical side and emotional side.

Lauren Whalley, Fashion Editor, Beauty & Inclusivity

People listen to what you have to say: They understand where it’s coming from and they know that they can learn from you.

Sarah Hanlon, Entertainment & Celebrity Editor

You are free-spirited and easygoing. You like to do things quick and dirty. When things are going your way, you are extremely agreeable.

Sofia Deeb, Assistant Fashion Commerce Editor

When I look at your print, the first thing I see is a bird taking flight. I also see that your emotional life is extremely layered.

What Should Your Wedding Send-Of Be?

Where isitgoing down?

YOU AND YOUR SPOUSE SHOULD LEAVE YOUR DAY IN STYLE. USE THIS FUN FLOWCHART TO DETERMINE WHICH WEDDING EXIT IS THE PERFECT MATCH.

Outdoor Indoor Hybrid

Throwing awedding after-party? Indeed Pass

Throwing awedding after-party?

Totally Skip

BY CHAPELLE JOHNSON ILLUSTRATIONS BY TIANA CRISPINO

Throwing awedding after-party?

Yes No

Beyoncé or Katy Perry? Are you chill or over the top?

Don’twantto worry about cleanup?

Iguess a little is fine. Absolutely not.

What’sthe theme?

Romantic and dreamy

Bubbles

Confetti

Use this classic symbol of celebration— just ensure it’s biodegradable.

Bring childlike wonder to your exit with bubble shooters.

BeyHive, always.

KatyCats, unite.

I’ma drama queen, in a good way. I’m super low-key.

GlowSticks

Give your guests a fun keepsake and something to dance with at the after-party.

and something to at after-party.

Alternative and funky a

Rose Petals

Nothing says romance like roses. Even Beyoncé used flower petals for her exit.

Fireworks

Leave with a bang by having a spectacular fireworks display.

fireworks

Rice

The myth about rice being harmful to birds has been debunked, so consider this affordable option.

Find

Good

BY TRES DEAN

In the second season of the critically acclaimed television series The Bear, a motif recurs in each episode: a sign on the wall that reads, “Every second counts.” In the context of the show’s restaurants, it signals that the difference between five seconds and seven seconds can mean the failure of a dish. But it also reminds the show’s characters, as they navigate emotional highs and lows, that time is vital. Its passage warrants respect and acknowledgment—especially on one of the most important days of your life. Perhaps that’s why gifting wedding watches has become more popular in recent years.

WELCOME MARRIAGE WITH A CLASSIC TIMEPIECE THAT’S MEANT TO LAST A LIFETIME.

1. Oyster Perpetual Submariner Date, price upon request, Rolex.com

“Watches lend themselves remarkably well to weddings. They’re extremely durable, which resonates in the context of the lasting bond of marriage,” says Chase Pion, cofounder of watch consignment and concierge service Bezel. Timepieces can be a wedding day gift or a personal statement piece. There’s even the growing trend of gifting engagement watches, as couples eschew traditional engagement rings in favor of ritzy timepieces. A wedding watch is a day-of accessory option that is equal parts sentimental and stylish.

Converting a regular timepiece to a wedding watch often involves personalization, says Pion: Add an engraving, usually on the back of the watch’s case, or the wedding date. In some cases, a message between partners does the trick. One of the most storied watches of all time, albeit not a wedding watch, is Paul Newman’s Rolex Daytona gifted by his wife, Joanne Woodward. The actor and part-time race-car driver wore a few pieces over the years, but the most famous was this one, which bore the inscription “Drive Carefully.” Pion also suggests that engravings aren’t the only way to ensure a watch commemorates your union. “You can choose colors that are significant in your spouse’s life or culture, or go with a watch manufactured in their birth year or the year of the wedding.”

cases, a message between partners does the trick. One of the most storied watches of all time, albeit not a watch, is Paul Newman’s Rolex Daytona his wife, Joanne Woodward The actor and race-car driver wore a few over the years, but the most famous was this one, which bore the “Drive Pion also suggests that engravings aren’t the way to ensure a watch commemorates your union. “You can choose colors that are in your life or culture, or go with a watch manufactured in their birth year or the year of the There’s no wrong way to select a watch You also don’t need a for a stellar look If to go the sentimental route, consider a heirloom or a that with tradition For my wore an Seamaster most of his and my dad still has his Omega Constellation on his dresser. Earlier this year, I an of my own, a Seamaster 300M, and I’m near-certain I’ll wear it the I get married. Seamaster 300Ms are steel dive watches, not a traditional dress but mine on a

There’s no wrong way to select a wedding watch. You also don’t need a five-figure timepiece for a stellar wedding day look. If you’re looking to go the sentimental route, consider a family heirloom or a piece that aligns with tradition. For example, my grandfather wore an Omega Seamaster most of his life, and my dad still has his Omega Constellation on his dresser. Earlier this year, I bought an Omega of my own, a Seamaster 300M, and I’m near-certain I’ll wear it the day I get married. Seamaster 300Ms are steel dive watches, not exactly a traditional dress watch, but wearing mine on a special day is far more important to me.

of dress watches, let’s break down for your day Dress watches are meant to well with more formal attire to have minimal faces and cases and will be on functional features like or chronomovements common in racing watches Dress watches almost have leather bands. The most iconic of all time

Speaking of dress watches, let’s break down why they’re perfect for your wedding day. Dress watches are essentially timepieces meant to pair well with more formal attire. They’re going to have fairly minimal faces and cases and will be light on functional features like waterproof protection or chronograph movements common in racing watches. Dress watches almost always have leather bands. The most iconic of all time is the Cartier Tank, a square watch from the French jeweler, though these days, almost every major watch brand offers their take on the style.

That said, it’s still appropriate to rock a sportier style. For some, it makes more sense to do so, both from a sentimental and practical point of view. Actor and avid watch collector Henry Golding speaks fondly of his Tudor Black Bay, the watch his wife gifted to him on their wedding day. Tudor makes sturdy, sporty steel watches that look incredible but also hold up to a lot of wear and tear. It was the perfect piece for Golding, who at the time was the host of a travel documentary show that had him traipsing through jungles, rivers and risky terrain. A Tudor looks great with a suit despite not being a traditional dress watch, and more importantly for Golding, it was a reminder of his wedding day he could take on his journeys. Golding’s collection is now full of rarer and more expensive timepieces, but he speaks often of his Black Bay being

2. The Runwell 41 MM,

$595, Shinola.com

3. Koppel 41 MM Chronograph, $1,295, GeorgJensen.com

4. Nero Sabbia Ref. 1072-A, $620, FurlanMarri.com

5. Manero Peripheral, $18,200, Carl-F-Bucherer.com

6. Flagship Heritage, $3,050, Longines.com

7. Chronograph 1, $9,650, Porsche-Design.com

2. The Runwell 41

Shop our favorite wedding-worthy timepieces.

one of the most important to him. Wedding dresses may only be worn once, and even if you keep your wedding suit or tux in your closet for future use, you probably aren’t wearing it every single day. A wedding watch, though, represents both a single special moment and a lifetime with your spouse. There will be no other day where minutes, hours even, feel like seconds than on your wedding day. A classic timepiece is a wonderful gift that serves as a lasting reminder that every second counts.

It’s Not About the Dishes

Identify and shatter unhealthy patterns in your relationship.

ILLUSTRATION BY ABBY MCCARTIN BY ESTHER LEE

Tracy Dalgleish (@DrTracyD), PhD, is a clinical psychologist and the author of I Didn’t Sign Up For This. A relationship expert with over 15 years of experience, Dalgleish guides couples and individuals through emotionfocused therapy to help them communicate better. Here she shares her best advice for breaking unproductive patterns in your relationship.

“Couples frequently get stuck arguing about several common topics: dishes, sex, in-laws, finances or kids,” says Dalgleish. “Over time, the disagreements might be about different topics, but the patterns of tense communication start to sound the same.” The underlying factors driving the disagreements, which often start in the early stages of a

relationship, are far deeper. “There are primary emotions, like pain, loneliness and hurt, plus unmet attachment needs and longings that are not being expressed. These often sound like: ‘Do I matter? Am I important to you? Am I enough? Am I adequate?’ These core needs and longings often are rooted in early childhood experiences and previous relationships. You

What was the trigger and why did it lead you to feel overwhelmed or upset?

repeat what you don’t repair.” The exercise below can help you identify and break unproductive patterns within your relationship. Before you start, Dalgleish encourages each partner to share a self-reflection on how they contribute to the communication lapses. After your next disagreement, unpack the following questions together.

What did you feel initially and what other feelings subsequently showed up? (Think of your emotions like an iceberg. What lies underneath?)

What did you learn about relationships growing up? Did your parents argue? Does this remind you of early memories?

When you feel this way, what do you need from me?

“Relationships go through seasons: some easy, others hard,” concludes Dalgleish. “Big celebrations or vacations aren’t the only things that deepen intimacy. You maintain the spark through small acts you make every day showing that you choose your relationship.”

ALL

PHOTOS: GETTY IMAGES; COLLAGE BY TIANA CRISPINO

The State of the Union

IT’S 2023. ARE PERCEPTIONS OF MARRIAGE REALLY CHANGING? PSYCHOLOGISTS AND RESEARCHERS SAY MAYBE.

BY ESTHER LEE

On an average weekend morning in lower Manhattan, 20- and 30-somethings clad in athleisure are seated or waiting in line for their coffee orders. Most stare down at devices, scrolling, swiping or texting. The age of technology has caught up to the first generation that grew up with iPhones—Gen Z—and it’s influenced how they interact with the world. Relationships included.

Since 2019, dating apps have been the most popular way engaged couples meet. Historically, people most often found marriage prospects within their community, through mutual friends, at a restaurant, bar or coffee shop, or at work or school. Yet the last decade has seen an evolution in dating habits: 28 percent of all to-be-weds are now swiping, vetting and engaging with potential partners online. Seventy-five percent of couples still meet through other mediums, but societal dating and marital habits have evolved as people have become increasingly reliant on technology.

Another story is playing out for millennials, many of whom experienced the shift from dial-up internet to highspeed Wi-Fi and were among the beta testers of dating apps. There are more single people over 40 than ever before. In 2021, a quarter of 40-year-olds in the US had never been married, up from 20 percent in 2010 and 6 percent in 1980. Of course, this is due to multiple factors. Women are more highly educated. Behavioral scientists state that single

women over 30 without children are the happiest subset of people in the country. A groundbreaking recent report found that young and middle-aged men are getting lonelier, which is influenced by dating app usage as well as high standards for relationships. Whereas marriage was once viewed as protecting women, with the man providing legal and financial support, such outdated views are dissipating. To add to the dialogue, marriage rights aren’t guaranteed for certain communities, especially LGBTQIA+ couples as of late. (In July 2023, the Supreme Court set a new precedent after ruling that a Colorado website designer could deny services to gay couples based on her religious beliefs.)

The question now remains: Is marriage still relevant? “Every generation of young people has to figure out what they want from life,” says Charles T. Hill, PhD, a professor of psychology at Whittier College. “Often, there are expectations of getting married and having children to please parents, to meet an individual’s personal needs, to prove their adult and sexual identities. Even to confirm that they are desirable to others. Each has to figure out who they are and who they want to be.”

In The Knot Worldwide Future of Marriage Report, (conducted in June 2023 among 1,000 survey respondents), sentiments about marriage depend on your generation and life stage. Among Gen Z* respondents, 53 percent said they “definitely” see themselves getting legally

Among Gen Z* respondents, 53% said they “definitely” see themselves legally getting married in the future, while another 28% said they’re open to the possibility.

married in the future, while another 28 percent said they’re open to the possibility. In fact, the feelings related to marriage were exciting (66 percent) and anticipatory (72 percent).

There appears to be a growing dichotomy in marital perceptions between Gen Z and millennials. As people get older, our data shows that those who are single start to feel less strongly about the idea of marriage. Only one in three respondents in their 30s said they “definitely” see themselves getting legally married. The statistic among those over 35 drops to 28 percent.

Why Gen Z and Millennials View Marriage Diferently

The biggest reason is a difference in life stages and experiences. “People in their 30s and 40s have gone through a period of [many] social changes,” says Norman B. Epstein, PhD, who oversaw the Couple and Family Therapy master’s program at the University of Maryland for over three decades. “For example, there are more women than men in college [and grad school], and career opportunities have expanded. There are more people in that age group who’ve actually delayed looking for a life partner, because they were busy with their education.” Priorities have shifted for women in particular.

The other influential factor is a person’s identity, including self-confidence and self-awareness. “For people who are older, singlehood can be validating. Many single people are confident and independent, and going alone can boost self-esteem,” says Epstein. “It depends how people think about it.” On the other hand, some individuals might feel insecure about their singlehood. “They might think, ‘I should be married. Is something wrong me?’ That obviously can lower self-esteem. On the flip side, a person can say, ‘Wow, I’m a whole person by myself and I have strengths. Other people like me. It’s not like I’m a hermit or an outcast.’ Marriage is not the only way to get validation and support.”

Hill argues that the desire to marry also may be tainted by the ongoing economic, political and social climate. “Some may be concerned about being able to support a spouse and children or the marriage not working out,” he says. “Some may be concerned about the future state of the world regarding climate change, inflation and political division, especially in regard to bringing children into the world. Others may be concerned about attracting a spouse due to social comparison.”

What Social Media Is Doing

As Theodore Roosevelt said, “Comparison is the thief of joy.” While social media comes with its benefits (community, connection and inspiration), it can also fuel comparisons across careers, lifestyles and relationships. “I have an issue with social media for that reason,” says Epstein, who points to curated moments on social media. “It’s a risk factor when people go on social media and start to think about others in wonderful relationships. It isn’t so good for the mind. For example, when you’re at a restaurant, it looks like all the other couples are having a fine time together. You might think, ‘They must be doing great.’ Yet we don’t know what they do when they go home and when they’re not in a restaurant.”

Hill points to society’s reliance on dating apps and social media platforms, which create grounds for comparison. In his book Intimate Relationships Across Cultures, Hill found that the approval of

Gen Z’s Top 5 Sentiments About Marriage

1 3 2 4 5

parents and friends is one of the factors that predicted relationship satisfaction and commitment. Social media had nothing to do with the quality of the relationship between partners.

The Grass Is Greener…or Is It?

Comparisons also influence that inexhaustible conversation about singlehood vs. married life: Which is better? The grass may appear greener from one perspective or, even worse, people may cast judgment on the other side. Researchers and experts say the answer is subjective: It boils down to your needs and priorities. Both come with a slew of benefits.

If you’re single: “There’s less responsibility for meeting the needs

of a spouse, and coordinating living together and reducing conflict,” says Hill. “Plus, there’s less responsibility for raising any children that may result. Those who are single have more freedom to do what they want when they want, like a career or leisure activities, or to play the field without commitments.”

Marriage also comes with psychological benefits—and some legal and tax perks too. “Marriage increases the likelihood of having someone you can count on to meet psychological needs, such as someone to talk to, do things with or share affection with,” says Hill. “A spouse may help support you financially, and help you have and raise children. Marriage also provides legal benefits, such as financial rights if you divorce, parental rights if you have children, visitation rights if you are hospitalized.” This is one reason why family lawyers encourage you to get a prenuptial agreement, as it gives you documentation protecting both parties in the worst case scenario.

Doing It Diferently

To be clear, a loving relationship is different from a marriage. Nontraditional couples, some in lifelong partnerships, have shirked the formal marriage process. For example, Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell have been together since 1983. Both were married previously, and after their own experiences with divorce, they decided it was a better financial decision to avoid the legal process. While Hawn and Russell are among the more visible couples who’ve decided to go this route, our study found that millennial and Gen Z respondents widely accept nontraditional partnerships.

A possible future trend is couples throwing a celebration to mark their partnership, without signing the marriage certificate. The study discovered that nearly half of Gen Z respondents who don’t plan to marry still anticipate throwing a party to celebrate their relationship; 36 percent of millennials plan the same. Regardless of whether they plan to marry, most Gen Z respondents said they would throw a party in honor of the relationship. Only 18 percent said they would keep the legal ceremony.

Still, the majority of Gen Zers and millennials still prioritize finding a lifelong partner—and they’re doing it with care. “My research reveals that personality is the most important factor,” says Hill. “Having similar values, attitudes and interests matter, so you have something to talk about and things to do together, besides being physically intimate.”

Ever connected, Gen Z is catching on. A recent study discovered that young people are having less sex than their counterparts in past decades. While this is influenced by a range of factors, the greatest is that Gen Z’s focus on self-care and mental wellbeing has shifted attitudes about casual hookups. “Physical attractiveness is not as important as people think,” says Hill. “It plays a role in initial meeting, but so does intelligence and especially personality.” He brings up the Boston Couples Study, a longitudinal study of couples who dated in college, that found that ratings of physical attractiveness did not predict whether a couple would stay together for two years or if they’d be married 15 years later.

The Divorce Rate Is Declining, by the Way—Thanks to Therapy

For decades, almost half of couples faced divorce. That statistic has dropped considerably among younger generations, with the US rate now at 35 percent. Epstein notes that the rate is only going up

for people in their 50s and 60s. “They are the ones who may think they haven’t been happy in their relationships in a long time,” he says. “With only a certain amount of time left in life, they want to make sure they are happy.” Many people in their 30s and 40s have witnessed or been influenced by divorce. “That certainly has had an impact on people’s attitudes. It’s in the back of a lot of people’s minds.”

In 2023, there’s an emphasis on getting married and staying married. “Breaking up is very stressful. If you take a look at stress scales, divorce is one of the most stressful things that can happen to a person,” says Epstein. “My impression is that more people are taking advantage of counseling and therapies instead of trying to tough it out themselves or ignoring [issues]. It’s more acceptable now to go to therapy.”

Couples are also aware of what to look for in a partner. The best relationships, says Epstein, are marked by shared attributes on both sides. “One is flexibility,” he says. “If you have a difference of opinion or preferences, you want somebody who is flexible and willing to talk it out. You need somebody who is a good communicator.” In addition, he says to look for someone who is a good listener. “They’re not jumping in, judging or giving advice, but they’re good at empathic listening.”

Validation is another key trait for a marriage. “Support goes both ways,” he says. “Shared values are also important. That’s the thing about ‘birds of a feather flock together’ over ‘opposites attract.’ If you’re too opposite and don’t share basic goals in life and values, even at the beginning, it could be fun but sooner or later, those couples bump up against each other.”

So…What Is Marriage at This Point?

Marriage is a legal process. “It isn’t just a private commitment,” says Hill. “[The marriage certificate] makes it a legal commitment, and the ceremony makes it a social commitment, with recognition and approval from family members and friends. It may also be a religious commitment, depending on the setting and the officiant.” While most of Gen Z hasn’t embarked upon the wedding planning process, they still feel largely positive about marriage. These sentiments can evolve with experience and changes in life. “A person’s perspective is so important,” says Epstein. “If you’re single and you see it as a strength, you’re gonna feel very different than if you’re single and you say, ‘I’m a loser.’”

Based on forecasting and trends, the majority of Gen Z and single millennials will eventually marry. The average age of marriage may be in flux, but it’s still a priority for most people. “Marriage as an institution is here to stay because it meets personal, familial and societal needs that cannot be as easily met through short-term interactions,” concludes Hill. “That doesn’t mean that everyone will marry, but many and perhaps the majority will.”

*Generation Z within the context of the study is classified as those between the ages of 18 to 26. The average age of the respondents was 23.

YELLOWJACKETS STAR SAMANTHA HANRATTY IS READY TO WED THE LOVE OF HER LIFE.

BY ESTHER LEE

PHOTOGRAPHY BY LAUREN DUKOFF | STYLING BY REBECCA DENNETT

Birdcage veil by Jennifer Behr; ring by De Beers; engagement ring, Samantha’s own.

Fifteen minutes into the conversation, Samantha Hanratty begins to tear up. It isn’t because of something I said, but a few words from the Yellowjackets star’s fiancé, Christian DeAnda. DeAnda has joined Hanratty’s interview, and one of my questions takes both by surprise: What do you love most about Hanratty? “One of my favorite traits is how much she wants to help others and be that person they can rely on. She wants to make everyone around her feel special,” he says. “I love how open she is with me—we talk about anything on the face of the earth. That makes me feel comfortable and lets me know that there is no off-limits topic between us. We also have a lot of similar interests. I’m a huge nerd, and she’s fallen into that world with me.” This love story began during lockdown in 2020. Filming had temporarily halted. Hanratty had just moved home to be with family in California and decided to test dating apps. “I was craving human connection,” she says. “I saw Christian’s profile on Bumble—he’s such a cutie patootie—so of course I swiped. He had already swiped right.”

“She doesn’t hold back…

That’s one of the things I love about her.”

Suit by Carolina Herrera; ring by Van Cleef & Arpels; shoes by Roger Vivier; hair clip by Lelet New York.

Dress and capelet by Oscar De La Renta; earrings by Pomellato.

As an asthmatic, Hanratty was concerned about the logistics of dating during the COVID-19 pandemic. “We finally pinned down a socially distanced hike,” she recalls of their first date. “It was really easy. I wanted to spend more time with him. The conversation was easy. We laughed a lot. I was dying because I’m not good at hiking and needed water. He offered me his and I drank it, not thinking about the pandemic. Then I said, ‘We’re stuck together now.’”

Less than a month later, Hanratty knew DeAnda, then a college student and now working in film production, was her person. Hanratty’s poised demeanor shifts into what you might call “golden retriever energy” when DeAnda joins our call. “Baby, you’re muted,” she says. “I was saying that I knew pretty quickly that you were ‘the one’ for me…I knew I loved him and that he probably wasn’t ready. I also knew I needed to tell him, because I don’t like feeling something without expressing it. So I said, ‘I love you’ and told him not to say a word. He looks at me and goes, ‘You’re so special.’ I wanted to die.”

As cringeworthy as that conversation seemed in that moment for Hanratty, DeAnda meant his words. “I like to take my time,” he says. “I wanted to say it at the right moment, and for her, she doesn’t hold back. She can’t hold it in and wants to tell me and the world. That’s one of the things I love about her.”

Hanratty also had a hunch about DeAnda’s proposal, so much so that she asked him—that day—if he was planning to pop the question. He had to divert her suspicions. “She goes, ‘I feel like you’re gonna propose to me today.’ I was like, ‘Baby. I wish that were the case. Whenever you say things like this, I feel pressured. I wish I could do that today.’” Since he was attending school at the time, DeAnda told a white lie and said he was driving to campus. “Meanwhile, I’m driving to the proposal location,” he says. Hanratty, who giggles as she hears it from his perspective, looks wistfully at her future husband. I can confirm that she isn’t one to hold back her feelings.

For Hanratty, the road to DeAnda, wedding planning and embracing love has taken a roundabout and sometimes thorny path. A former Disney Channel actress, she talks

about her battle with alcoholism as a member of young Hollywood. In 2018, she decided to go sober. “It became clear I wouldn’t be here or make it to 26 or 27,” she says. (The “27 Club” is known within the entertainment industry as a tragic group of young talent who’ve lost their lives to addiction, like Jimi Hendrix, Amy Winehouse and Kurt Cobain.) That awakening meant Hanratty has been intentional about sobriety, including on her wedding day. She’s asked DeAnda to hold off on drinking with his friends (a common tradition among groomsmen) before their ceremony. “I don’t want the first kiss to taste like alcohol,” she says.

The decision to pursue sobriety and reconcile her relationships all came down to Hanratty prioritizing her mental well-being. Therapy has taught her how to be open and have an honest dialogue, skills she will bring to her marriage. For that reason, Hanratty and DeAnda are doing premarital counseling, which has been enlightening for both as they discuss lifestyles, monetary habits and other intimate conversations they will continue in marriage.

We discuss their upcoming wedding at length. They are holding it at Terra Mia Vineyards in Paso Robles, California. All four of Hanratty’s sisters (each of whom got married at age 28, like Hanratty will) are bridesmaids. With 150 to 170 people attending their wedding, the couple presented one caveat in their save-the-dates. “I wanted to make it very clear that if you don’t believe in love for all, and you don’t celebrate love for all, we’d rather you send your best wishes,” Hanratty says. “I’m bisexual and really wanted the people there to be ones who would have supported me no matter who I ended up with. A lot of my friends happen to be queer, and I didn’t want a situation where anybody feels any way other than loved and respected. And so I’ve had quite a few declines.”

The last time Hanratty tears up is when we discuss what she most looks forward to on her wedding day. “I’m going to cry,” she says. “More than anything, I look forward to when I walk down the aisle—and I look at him, in his suit—to this song that recites what it means to walk towards love.”

Scan the code for behindthe-scenes video footage of Samantha on set.

“I wanted to make it very clear that if you don’t believe in love for all, and you don’t celebrate love for all, we’d rather you send your best wishes.”

Dress by Dana Harel; earrings by Swarovski.

Dress by Monique Lhuillier; ring by Pomellato.

Dress by Vera Wang; necklace by De Beers.

Hair by Andre Gunn; makeup by Adam Breuchaud; tailoring by Susie Kourinian; set design by Gabriela Cobar.

SCENTS

Wish you could bottle up your wedding day forever? Well, you kind of can. Science shows there’s a strong connection between scent and memory, because they’re both processed in the same area of the brain. This is why selecting your wedding fragrance is such an important (and personal) decision. With countless perfumes and colognes to consider, choosing one that suits your personality and style can be overwhelming. The best way to determine your ideal signature wedding scent starts with understanding the four main fragrance families. We’ll break them down for you. Once you’ve landed your vibe, your wedding day fragrance is not far behind.

1. You eau de parfum, $68, Glossier.com

2. Kayali Vanilla 28, $125, Sephora.com

3. Miss Dior eau de parfum, $100, Dior.com

4. Maison Margiela Replica Beach Walk, $85, Sephora.com

Floral

The vibes: timeless, feminine, romantic

Floral fragrances are one of the most popular choices for weddings—and for good reason. The subcategories of floral scents are varied, ranging from light and airy

to decadent and rich. A citrusy floral fragrance, for example, is a great option for outdoor weddings and summer affairs, while a classic rose scent evokes timeless elegance. The fruity floral category, on the other hand, adds a punch of juiciness and vibrancy, making it perfect for a playful and spirited to-be-wed.

Spicy

The vibes: enchanting, sensual, exotic

For an exotic and enchanting scent, spicy fragrances reign supreme. They evoke an air of mystery and sensuality, with warm and peppery notes that create a luxurious aura. Vanilla, musk, amber and patchouli are prevalent in these fragrances, which can also feature notes of cinnamon, nutmeg and clove to create a warm and inviting ambiance. If you prefer a more complex and sophisticated scent, try a woody blend, which combines notes of sandalwood, vanilla and musk for a sensual and indulgent aroma. Spicy scents are a great match for fall and winter “I dos” or a boho bride.

Woodsy

The vibes: earthy, grounded, elegant

Unlike traditional floral or fruity scents, a woodsy fragrance is an excellent choice for someone looking for an adventurous aroma, making it a popular pick for modern and boho couples. The subcategories of the scents vary depending on the type of wood used, such as sandalwood, cedar or oud. A green woodsy fragrance, for instance, smells fresh and invigorating by combining notes of pine and moss. In contrast, a smoky one infuses notes of leather and tobacco for a bold, sophisticated aroma.

We have 10 favorite colognes for guys. Can you guess what they are?

5. Dolce & Gabbana Light Blue Summer Vibes eau de toilette, $101, Sephora.com

6. Viktor&Rolf Flowerbomb eau de parfum, $96, Ulta.com

7. Gucci Flora Gorgeous Jasmine eau de parfum, $100, Sephora.com

HOW TO FIND YOUR SIGNATURE

SCENT

Make Scent of Your Surroundings

Take a look around your home. Note the candles, essential oils or perfumes you already reach for on a daily basis. This may give you a hint about what to search for on the shelves.

Samples FTW

Grab minis of your top scent contenders to try before committing to a full-size bottle. Plus, if you end up falling for multiple fragrances, you can switch them up for your different wedding events and

A Scent-sational Date Night

Step into your local perfume store and rank your favorite scents. The winner is just a spritz away.

You:

Notes:

Winner: Your Partner:

Try your sample to see how it wears—it

and night. Rememwear your fragrance, Your wedding scent should be something that speaks to you personally, not just

Fresh

The vibes: clean, crisp, refreshing

Fresh fragrances perfectly balance the sweet and rich nature of floral and spicy scents. The subcategories of fresh scents vary from aquatic to citrusy to green. A citrus fragrance, for instance, features zesty notes of lemon, mandarin and grapefruit, making it an excellent choice for daytime weddings and outdoor events. An aquatic fragrance, on the other hand, evokes the cool, breezy ocean air, creating a refreshing and calming scent perfect for a summer beach wedding.

Notes:

Winner:

PUT A RING ON IT. FROM UNTRADITIONAL GEMSTONES TO CIGAR BANDS AND SPINNERS, WE’VE GOT THE DEETS FOR YOUR DIGITS (AND THE FLAWLESS MANIS TO MATCH).

PHOTOGRAPHY BY JOSEPHINE SCHIELE STYLING BY REBECCA DENNETT

On right, from top: Marquise center pavé diamond dome ring, $4.500, JacquieAiche. com. Illusion tri-stone ring, $5,390, Ritique. com. Swell band, $2,800, Mociun.com. Rory split-shank ring, $6,000, AshleyZhangJewelry.com.

On left, from top: Round lab-grown diamond band, $1,015, GrownBrilliance.com. Streamline cigar ring, $3,900, DavidYurman. com. Baguette lab-grown diamond band, $630, GrownBrilliance.com.

Clockwise from left: Yellow slice diamond flower ring, $24,500, NinaRunsdorf.com. Aella diamond ring, price upon request, DeBeers.com. Nudo ring with sky-blue topaz and agate center stone, price upon request; Nudo ring with sky-blue topaz center stone and diamond pavé, price upon request, Pomellato.com.

Divas’ Dream ring with diamonds and rubellite, $13,300, 1-800-BVLGARI. OBS pavé pear diamond ring, price upon request, DeBeers. com. Calla Flip pink topaz ring, $2,300, NinaRunsdorf.com.

From left: Emerald lab-grown diamond crossover ring, $3,290, GrownBrilliance. com. Pavé diamond galaxy ring, $12,025, AnitaKo.com. Fiorever ring with diamonds, $19,500, Bulgari. com. Pear lab-grown pavé diamond bypass ring, $4,265, GrownBrilliance.com.

From left: Round lab-grown diamond floating band, $640, GrownBrilliance.com. Lab-grown diamond solitaire ring, $22,000; Diamond solitaire ring, $4,000, Jared.com. Aria diamond ring, $21,100, DeBeers.com. Lab-grown diamond halo ring, $2,015, GrownBrilliance.com.

From left: Faceted diamond ring, $7,800; Streamline contour ring with pavé diamonds, $3,500; Beveled band ring with pavé diamonds, $4,600, DavidYurman.com.

Nails by Yukie Miyakawa. Models: Son Chung, Shuya Chang & Jorge Torres for Parts Models.

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THE

S U I T E

INSIDE THE WORLD’S MOST EXTRAORDINARY HONEYMOON VILLAS, BUNGALOWS AND SUITES.

BY JEN MURPHY

ESCA PE

Skip the kitschy, romance-themed honeymoon suite and splurge on the best room category that exists. Your postwedding celebration should be all about you, so there’s no guilt in hunkering down in a dreamy hotel room and hanging the “Do Not Disturb” sign for a few days. We’ve scoured the globe to find the most luxurious, amenity-filled accommodations in our favorite honeymoon destinations, from the bush of South Africa to the lagoons of the Maldives.

THAILAND

The towering karsts jutting up from Phang Nga Bay and wild beaches and waterfalldotted forests of Koh Kood are no longer secrets, but you’ll feel like you have them all to yourself at these secluded hideaways.

The View Villa at Six Senses

Yao Noi, Phang Nga Bay

Named for its 180-degree vistas of Phang Nga Bay, this two-floor, one-bedroom villa looks like a palatial tree house surrounded by tropical jungle. You can soak in the dazzling view from the infinity pool, outdoor shower and sunken outdoor dining area.

From $1,950; SixSenses.com Wow factor: A waterfall runs beneath the glass floor of the bedroom.

Must-do: The castaway experience delivers couples to a deserted island nearby via longtail boat and leaves you with a bottle of bubbly to toast the sunset ($195 for two people).

Sunset Ocean View Pool

Villa Suite at Soneva Kiri, Koh Kood

Perched on a rainforestshaded cliff, this 5,188-squarefoot, one-bedroom suite overlooks the sea and has a massive deck for sequestered sunbathing. Your personal “barefoot guardian” will attend to every need, like

a floating breakfast spread served in your private pool. From $1,000; Soneva.com

Wow factor: A 1,850-squarefoot infinity pool wraps around the suite.

Must-do: Explore the islands around Koh Kood by speedboat and stop in a village for dishes like sun-dried squid ($740 for two people)

SOUTH AFRICA

Africa’s safari lodges kicked off the glamping trend, but these one-ofa-kind stays prove fancy tents aren’t the only accommodations in the bush.

Waterside Luxury Suites at the Royal Malewane, Thornybush

Private Nature Reserve

South African design doyenne

Liz Biden’s newest property in game-rich Thornybush reserve shows off her affinity for vibrant colors and bold contemporary art. Each of the three luxury abodes has its own unique color scheme (Waterside Lodge’s is electric blue, orange and pink) and art, but all feature soaking tubs, outdoor showers and indoor fireplaces. From $3,000; TheRoyalPortfolio.com

Wow factor: Private heated pools and dining decks overlook a watering hole.

Must-do: Join Africa’s most qualified guiding team on a game drive.

The Treehouse Experience at &Beyond Ngala Safari Lodge, Ngala Private Game Reserve

Located three miles from the 20-cottage lodge, this four-story tree house soars 39 feet above the ground. Adventurous couples can tack on one night at this solarpowered accommodation and wake up to the roar of lions. An attendant delivers picnic-style dinners, and Swarovski binoculars make it easy to spot elephants. From $780. Tree house from $1,285; AndBeyond.com

Wow factor: The fourth-floor, sleep-out platform has a retractable awning for stargazing.

Must-do: Witness the darting of a rhino and assist a veterinary team in tagging the sleeping animal’s ear for research and monitoring, before releasing it back into the wild (from $4,680 for up to 8 people).

THE MALDIVES

The overwater bungalow originated in Tahiti, but the Maldives perfected the design. Throughout the atoll nation there’s no shortage of over-the-top stilted stays that feel more like private homes with outrageous amenities.

The Romantic Residence at Velaa Private Island, Noonu Atoll

You’ll be excused if you never leave this ultra-private onebedroom bungalow. Only accessible by boat and serviced by a private butler, it has every imaginable amenity, including a gym and spa-treatment room. A sprawling terrace is sprinkled with comfy daybeds, and when

you need to cool off, you can go for a dip in the infinity pool, sunken bath or lagoon. From $7,000; VelaaPrivateIsland.com

Wow factor: A private chef can prep your meals on a dining gazebo on a floating jetty.

Must-do: Nighttime snorkeling excursions use a blue light to see coral glow with colors invisible to the naked eye (from $400 for two people)

Two-Bedroom Ocean Residence at Milaidhoo, Baa Atoll

Located in the Baa Atoll UNESCO Biosphere Reserve, Milaidhoo is so small you can walk the island end-to-end in 10 minutes. Of the 50 villas, this overwater bungalow has the most coveted location at the end of the lagoon. Two bedrooms may seem excessive, but the stay includes a pop-up cinema experience on your deck, a private boat excursion, a dedicated chef and butler, and a private dinner. From $5,000; Milaidhoo.com

Wow factor: A “secret” loft deck hidden inside the roof of the villa is the ideal place for couples to take in views of the lagoon.

Must-do: The 120-minute Couples Connect treatment at the Serenity Spa includes a body scrub, massage, facial and chakra balancing session ($675 for two people)

THE CARIBBEAN

No place nails barefoot luxury quite like the Caribbean, and every island has its own interpretation. St. Barts is all about swanky beachfront stays, while St. Lucia’s top hotels feel stitched into the tropical landscape.

Galaxy Sanctuaries at Jade Mountain, St. Lucia

This 29-suite hotel is an architectural marvel that hovers over steep, jungled hills. Its three palatial Galaxy Sanctuaries boast commanding, 270-degree vistas and 900-square-foot infinity pools. Take a dip and you’ll feel like you can touch the Pitons, St. Lucia’s iconic twin peaks. From $3,400; JadeMountain.com

Wow factor: Enjoy the chromatherapy whirlpool tub in the open-air bathroom.

Must-do: Jade Mountain is the only resort on island with a helipad. Take advantage and book a 30-minute heli-tour to get a bird’s-eye view of Rodney Bay, Grand Anse Beach, the Sulphur Springs volcano and the Pitons ($620 for two people).

Beach Suites at Cheval Blanc St-Barth

Private terraces spill out onto Flamands Beach—arguably the island’s prettiest stretch of sand. And those powder-white shores match the elegant, whitewashed interiors of each of the four beach suites. Your private butler can draw a bubble bath in your castiron tub or arrange for a private poolside wine tasting. From $3,604; ChevalBlanc.com

Wow factor: Private infinity plunge pools overlook the turquoise bay. Must-do: The Gran Bleu Experience whisks honeymooners off to Colombier Bay aboard a private sailboat or yacht for a day of snorkeling, a champagne beach picnic and sunset cocktails (from $3,528 for two people)

HAWAII

Hawaii’s resorts take advantage of the islands’ beauty with rooms designed for indoor-outdoor living. The best feature massive lanais (verandas) where you can discreetly sip mai tais while watching the sun sink into the Pacific.

Beachfront One Bed Kauhale at Kona Village, a Rosewood Resort, Island of Hawaii

This 81-acre property on the Kona Coast reopened last summer under the Rosewood flag. Sustainably constructed, thatched-roof suites are steps from the sand of Kahuwai Bay. Complimentary cruiser bikes make it easy to reach the spa or Talk Story Bar, and oversized lanais give you an unbeatable vantage for sunset. From $6,400; RosewoodHotels.com

Wow factor: A suite stay includes a 60-minute service for two at Asaya Spa.

Must-do: Sail aboard a traditional Polynesian voyaging canoe handcrafted by your captain, local waterman and artist Mike Field ($200 for two people).

Ohana Ocean-View Suite at Four Seasons Resort Lanai

This landscaped paradise of breezy palms and fragrant plumeria is set on a red lava cliff overlooking a marine sanctuary. Floor-to-ceiling windows frame the Pacific, and Polynesian art fills the teak and mahogany interiors of these over 1,200-square-foot suites. Amenities range from an Apple TV 4K to Japanese ofuro tubs. From $4,250; FourSeasons.com

Wow factor: A private lanai overlooks Hulopoe Bay. Sip coffee and look out for the resident pod of spinner dolphins.

Must-do: Book an evening at the resort’s NASA-worthy observatory and learn how native Hawaiians used the stars to navigate ($200 for two people).

ITALY

Of course a country renowned for impeccable style and exquisite craftsmanship is also home to superlative hotels with suites that ooze opulent, old-world glamour.

Redentore Terazza Suite at the Gritti Palace, a Luxury Collection Hotel, Venice

This lavish resort sits within a 500-year-old palazzo along the Grand Canal. The entire top floor and roof is dedicated to a twobedroom suite worthy of a doge and dogaressa, with frescoed walls, Rubelli silks and priceless antiques. Windows frame landmarks like the dome of the

Santa Maria della Salute Basilica. $15,367; Marriott.com

Wow factor: A wrought-iron spiral staircase leads to a 2,690-squarefoot rooftop terrace (the only one in the city) with a plunge pool and dining area.

Must do: Tour historic Rialto market and learn to prepare dishes like seafood risotto, then enjoy a three-course lunch with wine pairing at the culinary school. $790 for two people; TheGrittiEpicureanSchool.com

Caruso Suite at the Grand Hotel Excelsior Vittoria, Sorrento

Countless stars have stayed at this legendary hotel in the cliffside town of Sorrento. Its most filmed and famed suite is dedicated to Italy’s admired tenor and former guest, Enrico

Caruso. It boasts a king-sized bed, a sitting area adorned with silk-upholstered Louis XVI chairs, trompe l’oeil artwork, an all-marble bathroom and a 300-square-foot terrace overlooking the bay. From $900; ExcelsiorVittoria.com

Wow factor: Original decor from Caruso’s month-long stay in 1921 includes his piano, writing board, and several photographs and letters.

Must-do: Order the “Greatest Eats” tasting menu at the hotel’s Michelin-starred restaurant, Terazza Bosquet, which also has one of the finest views in Sorrento.

UNITED STAYS OF AMERICA

By Esther Lee

Fun fact: Half of newlyweds choose to honeymoon in the US. You don’t need to travel far, let alone with a passport, to access next-level accommodations. Here are a few of our favorite properties in the lower 48 with the best on-site suites and amenities for couples.

• Castle Hot Springs, Arizona

• San Ysidro Ranch, California

• Dunton Hot Springs, Colorado

MEXICO

The Riviera Maya and Punta Mita are perennially popular for a reason, but resorts have smartened up, building überexclusive suites that feel worlds away from crowds.

Grand Tents at Naviva, a Four Seasons Resort, Punta Mita Nestled on a cliff overlooking the Pacific, this adultsonly jungle oasis has just 15 cocoon-like tents, which allows for incredibly personalized service. Extraspacious Grand Tents have sunset views that can be enjoyed from your private plunge pool, outdoor shower or indoor soaking tub.

From $4,950, all-inclusive; FourSeasons.com

Wow factor: Two-tier outdoor decks have dining and lounge areas, plus a fire pit.

Must-do: Experience a private couple’s temazcal (sweat lodge) journey guided by a local shaman. ($800 for two people for 150 minutes).

Presidential Bungalow, Hotel Esencia, Riviera Maya

Once the haven of an Italian duchess and now the personal project of a Hollywood producer, this sprawling 50-acre resort

fronts talcum-white sand, palm-lined Xpu-Ha Beach. The resort’s most private suite sits on its own 30,000-square-foot parcel of paradise and feels like a resort within a resort. From $7,500; HotelEsencia. com

Wow factor: Enjoy the private 130-foot swath of white sand with a beach palapa and dining area.

Must-do: Go snorkeling in the hidden lagoon at the north end of the resort’s beach. If you’re lucky, you’ll spot the resident family of manatees.

• The Dupont Circle, Washington, DC

• Faena Hotel, Florida

• The Cloister at Sea Island, Georgia

• White Elephant, Massachusetts

• Montage Big Sky, Montana

• Beach Plum Farm, New Jersey

• Ritz-Carlton Central Park, New York

• Nemacolin Resort, Pennsylvania

• The Vanderbilt, Auberge Resorts Collection, Rhode Island

• Wentworth Mansion, South Carolina

• Rosewood Mansion on Turtle Creek, Texas

• Amangiri, Utah

• Lotte Hotel Seattle, Washington

Scan the code for more suite stays across the US.

Love doesn’t make the world go round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile.

— Franklin P. Jones