Weddings January 2017

weddings The Malta Independent on Sunday 22 January 2017

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t’s official. You’re getting married.

Suddenly there are a million and one things to think about, including making sure you new status is totally legit. Whether you choose a church or civil wedding ceremony there is paper work and, as with all such things, there are no short cuts and you need to make sure you have every, single formality covered in good time.

Since 1975, when the Marriage Act was passed and civil marriages were introduced, couples who choose a civil ceremony have a very wide choice of locations and venues.

Obvious considerations such as easy access, environment, etc. aside, you are most likely to base the choice of where to have your wedding ceremony on sentimental reasons. Exchanging your vows somewhere that not only looks amazing but also has a special meaning for you both will certainly make the ceremony feel unique and leave guests convinced that your wedding really was an extra bit special!

Currently, you can choose from the Public Registry Offices in Malta or Gozo, or any other venue that the registrar approves. If you have your heart set on somewhere that has not already been approved, it is possible to apply for a licence from the Registry Office, except for poolside areas or beaches. However, if a beach at sunset is all you can imagine, you can tie the knot, officially, in a venue that is approved and still have a blessing, or ceremony and reception on the beach.

It’s also good to know that the goalposts are moving all the time so it’s worth making a special plea for your ideal location. In some cases, a wedding licence may well be granted after all. So, it’s always worth checking at the Registry Office before giving up on any of your dreams.

If you are handing your wedding over to a wedding planner, he or she will most

JANUARY 2017

MR & MRS A marriage may be made in heaven but it also needs to be legal on earth!

probably deal with the paper work.

Otherwise start early. And that goes for church weddings too.

Details of all the forms, necessary documents and information needed depend on the previous marriage status and nationality of both bride and groom and several other factors. Everything can be obtained from the Maltese Registry Office.

You can make an appointment by calling 2590 4200 or 2590 4212 -7. If you’ll be getting married in Gozo, apply at the Marriage Registry in Victoria, 2215 6380.

Provide details of your wedding date and venue. A registrar will be allocated to you and he will guide you through all the forms you must fill in and submit before you can get married.

At least six weeks, and no sooner than three months, before your wedding date you need to complete and submit all the necessary wedding forms to the Marriage Registry Office.

IT IS NO LONGER COMPULSORY FOR A COUPLE TO MARRY IN THE ACTUAL PARISH CHURCH OR CHAPEL OF THE BRIDE, OR GROOM

Two or three months before the date you want to marry, arrange for your marriage banns to be published at the Public Registry. The banns are displayed for at least eight days in public areas such as the Registry Office or an official area in the town where you will be married.

If you are one of many couples who would not feel truly married without a religious or church wedding, it is no longer compulsory for a couple to marry in the actual parish church or chapel of the bride, or groom. The choice of church can be up to you both, so you can include family or traditional sentiments and associations when you choose.

For a civil wedding there are just as many legal and form-filling requirements.

You can ask, or look on line, for details of all the information, documents and forms you will need. These will depend on a number things including, nationality, your current marriage status, even whether the bride will be using her maiden surname or her husband's surname after marriage.

The Marriage Registrar will need extra information and details if you are marrying a foreigner or have lived abroad for any time. These include photocopies of the witnesses’ identity cards, the name and surname of the priest who will celebrate the marriage ceremony and whether the bride will take her husband's name, after marriage, or keep her maiden name.

At this point you are probably

Are you planning a special event? Would you like to meet up with friends or family before you tie the knot? Look no further as both Hard Rock Café, Bay Street and Valletta Waterfront offer you the perfect venue with more than 15 years of experience. A selection of different menus to suit your tastes is available, either seated or standing, including open bar options with mouth-watering finger food selections. A live DJ warms up the atmosphere on Friday nights, which is ideal for a fun night out.

Our sales team will be more than happy to assist you with your booking. Our service team will ensure you enjoy the night from the moment you walk in and throughout dinner, while our kitchen brigade ensures you are served the best with Hard Rock’s signature dishes. After dinner you can relax or dance to the live music while enjoying our cocktails to stir up some fun.

For details contact us on sales@hardrockcafe.com.mt

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wondering where the expression: ‘Marriage is just a piece of paper’ came from. Do not be defeated. All the necessary certificates to prove who you are and where you are from are held in the depths of the Public Registry Office. From there you can obtain copies of your birth certificate, any previous marriage annulments and, in the case of widowhood, copies of death certificates for a previous spouse.

Ten days before a church wedding day you can collect three documents that are prepared by the Marriage Registry, and take them to the parish priest in the place where you will be getting married.

After the Nuptial Mass, you, your witnesses and the priest who administered the Marriage Sacrament will sign the Marriage Certificate. The bride should sign with her maiden surname or her late husband’s surname if she is widowed.

You could also, of course, have both a civil ceremony and a religious blessing, which may even demand far less paperwork than for a full Nuptial Mass.

So, give yourselves plenty of time to discuss what is needed with whoever you would like to conduct your service. You can then tie this celebration in with your other arrangements so any guests who would like to attend both events will be able to do so.

Finally, following the registration of church and civil weddings, your marriage certificate should be formally registered at the Public Registry Office.

Do not forget this vital detail. It has been known for people to spend decades, holding legitimate ID cards and living happily married lives to later discover, on applying for some travel or pension document that they are unable to prove who they are; the official records of their marriage, which most probably took place before 1975, or abroad, having failed to make it to the proper files!

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Aims & claims

Budgeting for a wedding can be a nightmare, especially if you need to keep a tight hold on the purse strings.

But don’t worry, help out there.

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here’s a saying that two can live as cheaply as one, but most couples know that this is not strictly true. So it does help to find as many ways as you can to manage your wedding expenses and discover the financial advantages of being married.

The first of these may be qualifying for the marriage grant of €271.04 each on your legal marriage.

Both the bride and the groom are eligible as the Marriage Grant is awarded individually to the bride and the groom, providing they each fulfill the eligibility criteria of having made at least 26 social security contributions prior to the date of the wedding. If one of the couple is ineligible, the grant will be awarded to whoever is eligible.

The process for obtaining the grant was simplified a few years ago so couples no longer have to apply for and submit forms to the Social Security Department to get their grant.

Once a couple has married or entered a same sex civil union they will receive a request for

information from the department asking for their IBAN number, their new address and whether the wife has changed her surname.

Once this information has been sent to the department, through the mygov.mt website, or been handed in to the couple’s district Social Security Department, they will receive the grant.

Aside from a helpful grant, it’s also good to know that you may be entitled to reclaim the VAT on your wedding expenses. So, remember to keep all the fiscal receipts because, you cannot claim VAT on items for which you have no fiscal receipt.

To do this you need VAT Form 28/07 the Applikazzjoni Għal Għotja Fuq Spejjez Li Għandhom X’Jaqsmu Ma’ Tigijiet issued by the VAT Department. This form can also be downloaded.

You will need to fill in your names and ID card numbers, the address of your marital home and the date of the wedding.

Also to be included are details of which spouse the payment from the treasury should be made to, and the address that the payment should be sent to.

Other information needed

includes: The full amount paid, in euros in the respective categories and the respective vendors’ VAT numbers; the full name and respective signatures of the applicants, telephone numbers and the date when the application form was signed.

Information is included with the form which identifies the items that make up the main expenses of the wedding. If you have other expenses which are not on the list, include all the relevant details on a separate piece of blank paper. It is very important that both husband and wife sign all additional papers.

Make copies of each receipt for

your records and send the originals when you apply for the refund. You will also need to present your marriage certificate and copies of your ID cards, both front and back.

When you are presenting individual invoices and fiscal receipts make sure they are all as specific as possible. That is for the cost of the wedding venue and of the catering and beverages.

This is because if a wedding venue is also providing the catering it will often present one bill for the two, which means your rebate may be less than if you present two separate

receipts.

Post or deliver your application to: Value Added Tax Department, Centre Point Building, Triq Ta' Paris, Birkirkara BKR 4633; phone 2279 9127. This is also the address for any inquiries or additional information you may need.

Whatever you do, don’t leave it too long. Your claim must be made within three months of your marriage or no refunds will be given.

On the face of it the claims mentioned above may not have a huge effect on your expenses but at such the start of married life, every little helps.

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HAPPY HONEYMO

With careful planning and an imaginative destination your honeymoon will certainly

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In Masai Mara National park you will often meet other couples!

Masai Mara, Kenya, offers luxury surroundings and spectacular scenery.

Sleeping under the stars while the Aurora Borealis (Northern Lights) shine around you is seriously romantic.

onsidering it’s perfectly possible to have a wonderful lowbudget honeymoon to remember without crossing the equator, in peak season, hauling piles of luggage stuffed with a priceless trousseau, how come the honeymoon is now up there with the wedding itself in cost and importance?

Because whether it is your first holiday away with your partner or one of many, after several years together, it is a very significant way to mark your new life together.

Your destination choice is not just about location. Just as important is the time of year you are going and what you can do when you arrive. Whether you want to travel the quickest way possible or make the journey a major part of the holiday is will have a huge influence on your final destination and travel arrangements, which should be extremely well-planned and leave as little as possible to chance.

However challenging and exciting the adventure of setting off for ‘wherever and whatever’ in this day and age could well end in disaster. A few preplanned certainties to cover accommodation, health and security are essential.

Surprise honeymoons can be a delight but whoever books them risks disaster if they fail to ensure that both bride and groom will love their choice.

Tempting as it might be, using such an important time to introduce a partner to the joys of exploring crumbling potholes, living as one of the family in a primitive jungle village or learning taxidermy could well see the couple taking separate holidays unhappily ever after.

This is a time to play safe and it’s perfectly possible to ensure an element of surprise without anyone leaving all suitable

Reykjavik, One of the cleanest cities in the world and location for some scenes from Star Wars, offers plenty of free activities.

Cruising on the Mekong Delta, Vietnam.

Saigon Street market. clothes, accessories, medication and i-tech equipment behind.

Consider the sensible and economical bride who believed she was going on a honeymoon/husband’s work convention, in an English industrial centre, in September.

Well, of course, they were deeply in love and love, as they say, is blind.

Her clever husband had packed an extra case with tropical wear, which was secretly swapped with his wife’s case before the luggage was loaded into the taxi. By the time they landed in their luxury resort both bride and groom were basking in romance and no

future travel ever quite lived up to the joy of that honeymoon.

Destinations with a difference The following few destinations, cover north, south, east and west. Researching carefully, by factoring in all your specific requirements, should give you everything you wish for in some original and unique surroundings.

Up North

Good for a winter wedding is Lapland, Finland as it is at its magical between late

Colourful and calmness are a feature of Cuba’s vast coastline.

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OONS

y be a trip of a lifetime.

By climbing to the top of one of Palenque’s upper temples you will be able to see the whole site.

November and mid March. live shows or blow your Iceland is in summer from June Sleeping under the stars spending money. to August. The capital city while the Aurora Borealis Reykjavik, where some scenes Down south (Northern Lights) shine around from Star Wars were shot, Masai Mara National Park, you is seriously romantic. And blends modern living Kenya will give you an cuddling up warmly to enjoy beautifully with an old world adventurous getaway to the the country’s unique and village style of living. Staying home of a stunning variety of breath-taking outdoor beauty in one of the cleanest, greenest wildlife. There is also the will keep you close together all and safest cities in the world means the force will always be fascinating local culture. Stay the time. Or stay in one of with you. at a luxurious riverside bush Kakslauttanen Arctic resort’s From December to April, camp and take an al-fresco thermal glass igloos or log Quebec, the French-speaking shower while the sun sets over cabins and go cross-country region of Canada skiing and a the countryside. skiing and walking, or a husky snowboard park at the worldThe huge island nation of and reindeer safari. There are famous Mont-Tremblant, Madagascar on the southeast log cabin saunas with gondola trips between the coast of Africa has rainforests, relaxation rooms and open Versant Soleil and the Versant beaches and reefs and is home fireplaces and a nearby ice hole Sud and a casino where you to thousands of animal species, should you need to cool off. can lounge at the bar, watch But the best time to visit that are not found anywhere

else. The busy capital is Antananarivo and close by is a hillside complex of royal palaces and burial grounds and a dirt road lined by massive centuries-old trees, known as Avenue of the Baobabs.

Go west

A less common choice than the US West coast and San Francisco would be Mexico offering surfers’ beaches, colourful, lively towns and ancient archaeological sites like Palenque a former Mayan city nestling in a lush jungle where howler monkeys howl in the treetops.

It offers pristine Colonial and Spanish architecture and the towering Parroquia de San Miguel Archangel church to explore and admire and rooftop bars to relax in.

Looking for a Caribbean holiday with sun, sea and sand, plus untouched underwater reefs, towering mountain ranges, breathtaking natural beauty and historical cities?

Then consider Cuba. You’ll find pristine sandy shores, offshore diving and snorkeling, historic and prime eco-tourist sites and exceptional places for rock climbing, forest treks, mountain biking and cave exploration. There is a vibrant nightlife with lots of bars, live music, dancing and the Tropicana open-air cabaret Famously cheerful and welcoming, Cuba is somewhere quite special.

Far east

Three separate weather systems run throughout Vietnam so there’s always sunshine in Vietnam. An abundance of outdoor adventures, beautiful beaches and a busy metropolis offer variety. Culture and history are found in Hanoi or the UNESCO-protected towns of Hue and Hoi An, There are world-class hotels throughout the country so you can travel to as many destinations you like. Explore Hanoi’s Old Quarter and the beaches and the island of Phu Quoc in the south to relax. You can also cycle almost all over the country, take a night-time tour of Saigon on a Scooter, cruise Halong Bay on a traditional junk or wander through the waterways of the Mekong Delta on a private sampan.

Cuba’s city streets are full of old architecture and collectors’ cars.

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SIMPLY …THE BEST! The importance of the best man’s speech, on which life-long friendships can stand or fall, should never be underestimated.

Apart from organising everything on the groom’s side of the wedding arrangements and delivering him, fit and sober, to the altar on the day, organising the groom’s night out, or stag do is something the best man has to get right. Plan it well!

The other is his wedding speech. Giving that speech can make a serious impression on the couple, their families and their guests.

If it’s too ordinary, long, short, crude or lacking in complimentary references to the wedding party and the couple’s past and happyever-after future, the speaker will feel his toes curling for months to come. And if it’s an over the top clever-dick performance the brides and guests toes will be curling.

On line there are hundreds of dos and don’ts, ideas and jokes for anyone with no idea where to begin. Some even offer a tailor-made speech writing service. But the important thing to remember is that a best man with the wisdom to realise the speech is not actually all about him will hit the right note, the one who goes that extra mile will reach perfect pitch.

always been a fan and does the best DJ Banana imitation! So I thought I’d try to get a message from him and then it snowballed from there!

Did you already know any of the celebrities who appeared? How did you choose them?

I chose people who would mean a lot to Robert: DJ Banana, as he’s always been a fan; Marica Mizzi because we used to love Ipokriti; Simon Busuttil and Joseph Muscat because they’re who they are, plus old Aloysians (like us) and so on.

Getting it right

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ctor and Creative, Thomas Camilleri caused a sensation when, in a role that clearly delighted him, of best man to close friend Robert Zammit, he totally reinvented the traditional speech. The result can be enjoyed on Google.

Since we cannot imagine so eclectic a group of celebs and politicians anywhere in the world rising to such an occasion, we

reckon Thomas’s achievement should be the last word in any feature on the subject. And we asked him to describe the experience.

Spoiler alerts have been kept to a minimum but take a look ASAP. It’s easy to see why you wanted to go for something really original with your speech but how on earth did you come with the idea for this video?

It started with DJ Banana. Rob’s

How did you go about approaching them to take part?

It was always just one degree of separation -- it IS Malta after all.

Regarding most people’s surprise at how I managed, it was remarkably simple. I just asked!

As people in the spotlight they’re continually bombarded with political and commercial requests so when I approached them with this idea which was just plain fun (and which ended up being positive exposure for all involved) they all jumped onboard.

Did you give any of them a ‘script’ or did they come up with their own messages?

I generally gave them a thorough description of Robert and our friendship and some suggestions but most were happy to riff

Weddings? …there’s no place like paradise!

on the pointers I gave.

Logistically, where and when did you film the messengers and how long did it take you, including editing etc?

The filming was easy, I did it all on my iPhone. My brother Mark was wonderful with the editing.

He does it for fun and had already had a small hit with his Malta: home video on YouTube.

Obviously, everyone was sworn to secrecy but was there ever a time you were afraid Robert might guess what you were up to?

The clip you see at the end when I sit with Robert and Charlotte I had to get before the wedding so I pretended that we were just doing some clips from all his friends -- they swallowed it hook, line and sinker!

The UK wedding party must have been stunned that you managed to persuade the Prime Minister, Leader of the Opposition and Archbishop to take part. Were you certain they would agree and what was their initial reaction?

Not at all! But my target was the Prime Minister and I thought that if he’d be willing to do it then everyone else would jump onboard too.

Were there any unwelcome hitches or especially amusing incidents during filming?

I must say the whole thing was

Be it a wedding for 20 or 500 guests, we can definitely make it a day to remember as our catering and banquet facilities are second to none.

Moreover the hotel’s professional and capable staff will assume responsibility for the details large and small to ensure that your dream wedding comes to fruition.

Venues include the Island’s Edge Lido beach, Captain’s Bridge pool deck and the Mosé Hall, all offering unobstructed views of the clear, blue Mediterranean Sea. Why not have your wedding under a Bedouin tent on our private sandy beach?

There is also extensive terrace space surrounding the outdoor pools overlooking the picturesque Paradise Bay, which can accommodate small or large parties.

The private sandy beach is also an interesting option for an after wedding party.

The choice of venues within the Paradise Bay Resort Hotel is endless!

Paradise Bay Resort Hotel…

Malta’s best kept secret.

a pleasure to do from start to finish and so many of the participants went out of their way to make it extra special. Peppi Azzopardi wrote a whole poem for Robert and Charlotte, such a sweet man.

You have probably been inundated with people asking you be their best man or script write a speech. Could writing and producing wedding video messages etc be a new string to your career bow?

I’m retired. At least that’s the line I give everyone now. It was my third turn as a best man and it’s hard to top that. Though in truth my good friend Jean asked me and two others to do the honours for his wedding last November and since he’s an avid climber I managed to arrange to have him climb the facade of St Aloysius college -- all four stories of it! Waiting for him at the top were about 50 friends and family as a surprise so that was good fun too.

If you haven’t already seen Thomas’ Best Man video please watch it. On all levels it is exceptional.

If you’re choosing a best man, or about to take on the task yourself, it will certainly challenge and inspire you.

And if you’re not that into weddings and are just leafing idly through this supplement you should still watch it. It will make

Marfa Road, Cirkewwa, MLH 9068, Malta T. (+356) 2152 1166 F. (+356) 2152 1153 E. events@paradise-bay.com www.paradise-bay.com

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Matri-money

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At one time, it was totally taboo to request money as a wedding gift, now it is almost expected.

ouples today have a completely different concept of money and see nothing wrong with this. In fact, all things considered, you might be surprised at how many people, from all walks of life, still consider requests for money as nothing short of vulgar.

But lasting visions of appalling ornaments, ghastly gadgets and items instantly banished to the back of a wardrobe, for which couples in former decades were forced to fake sincere gratitude, have finally created a justifiable backlash.

It is only natural that couples, especially if they already have a home that is equipped with all they need, or are both earning salaries that allow them to acquire a happily comfortable lifestyle, should regards gifts of money as a way of adding something extra special to their celebration and future. This may be in the form of a piece of furniture, artwork garden or home update or the chance to take off somewhere ‘out of this world’ on their honeymoon.

It could even turn out to be a piece of long-term conservation. Many couples ask guests to contribute plants to decorate and encourage wildlife in an area they wish to create in their gardens.

Traditional wedding gifts actually became redundant a long time ago because, even if couples are starting their home from scratch, they would naturally rather choose what goes in it themselves.

This is very likely what led to the

compromise of a wedding list in one or two of the bride’s favourite shops.

Everyone realised that this would be the best way for a guest to give a present the couple had chosen, without the physical hard cash connection which people were so keen to avoid.

And, there is still a lot to be said for spending happy hours in gorgeous shops making a wish list of all the things you would normally consider too extravagant or feel guilty buying yourself, in the knowledge that a dear friend or family member would love to make it their gift to you.

There are certainly plenty of ways to avoid unwanted and frankly useless gifts graciously. Printers and media portals have come up with hundreds of ideas for poems and pretty little message cards carrying your request for good-old hard cash in the most tactful and delicate of ways!

And beautifully decorated boxes, placed in the reception area, make it very easy for guests who want to also include a small, personal token or find it more convenient to bring their gift to the wedding.

There are even online banking arrangements for guests to place their gift directly into a special account. This account can be for home, honeymoon, even charity gifts in your name. Imagine, your guests could even join in your honeymoon. Not literally, of course. It works by you listing activities and or destinations for your honeymoon, and marking them precisely on a map. Guests

whose gifts are going towards a honeymoon can follow your adventures and gift you whatever part they like the most, or just make an open contribution.

The idea that there was a time when a couple’s first dinner party, using the brand new wedding gift dinner service, always included showing photos or videos of their honeymoon to family and friends now seems strangely quaint and charming.

What couples should never forget is that not all their guests have the same financial status. Those on a desperately tight budget, and some people can be very good at hiding this, or with demands on their finances that leave little spare, might even be dreading an invitation as soon as the engagement is announced.

Your own contemporaries might be budgeting for their own weddings, new home, baby whatever. Just one or two friends with close wedding dates can eat into tight funds when you factor in the hen/stag events, outfits that haven’t been seen at a wedding before and, of course, a generous gift.

In fact, the group of college friends who were all getting married around the same time and agreed to call a moratorium on presents, instead using the money they would have spent on three or four lots of wedding presents to buy themselves something special, could really have been onto a good thing.

Company CEOs, ministers, lecturers and other public figures must pay out small fortunes in gifts for people with whom they may have only a fleeting connection

Beautifully decorated boxes, placed in the reception area, make it very easy for guests who want to bring their gift to the wedding. but whose wedding invitations are they obliged to accept. They do have the consolation of knowing that their gift, because of its VIP association, will doubtless find pride of place among the other presents.

Perhaps it’s time to introduce the value added gift where guests with special talents give say a freezer full of homecooked dishes, home decorating jobs or even and it has been known, free dental appointments. In fact, many professionals such as photographers, musicians, florists, beauticians, etc find a gift in kind is just the kind of gift their friends welcome.

And, one last thing, if an ancient relative or die-hard traditionalist does show up with something which can at best be described as a conversation piece, don’t despair. There is always e-bay; someone might love it. And, if, as can happen, it is ancient and or quirky there is a possibility it could be worth a small fortune!

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AND THE BRIDE WORE… Floating down the aisle in white meringue mode is every little girl’s dream but in reality, wedding styles are always changing.

These beautiful examples from the 18th to the 20th century might help today’s brides decide whether to go for frothy romantic, retro or modern chic.

Layers and swirls capture the image for the 1990s

A white silk wedding dress from the mid 1800s

Sleeker styles appeared in the early 19th century.

Austerity measures in during World War II meant this silk wedding dress was worn by several brides

In the 1700s wedding dresses, although lavishly decorated, were not white

A 1920s wedding dress in silk and Brussels Lace