The Rider's Mag Feb. 2014 V15-n10

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The Magazine for the Narley Harley Rider

THE RIDER’S MAG READ FREE! RIDE FREE!

Volume 15 #10

Super Show 2014

February 2014

Kitchener H-D Men’s Night

What’s Shakin’ Black Hawks Show and Shine

Joke Page

Feature Bike We Support

Our Troops!!!

The Rider’s Guide to Ontario and Beyond!! Over 25,000 Readers and Growing www.theridersmag.com



Table of Contents Pg. 4 – What’s Shakin’

www.hipscycle.ca 900 Colborne St. East 519-756-6218 Brantford, Ontario

What’s going on!

Pg. 6 – Fighting for you rights.

Store Hours Mon-Fri 9am - 5pm Sat. 9am - 1pm

Scary Larry shakes things up.

Pg. 7 - On the Road

JR retired but still out there doing what he does.

Out and about with Critter

Our Ravishing Redhead goes to the Show

Pg.8 – Cruising with Critter Pg. 14 – Supershow 2014 Pg. 18 – Falcons MC

Tim Armstrong flies with the Falcons in support of the Troops

Pg. 22 – Run to the North Wall

Tim Armstrong pays respect

Pg. 25 – Joke Page Pg. 28 – Feature bike – Old Skool Chopper Pg. 30 – Biker Church – Pastor Dave Pg. 31 – Road Scribes of America Pg. 32 – Riding Dubai – Donnie Peterson Pg. 36 – Black Hawks Annual Show and Shine

Since 1988

WE DO IT ALL! M.T.O. INSPECTION STATION PARTS AVAILABLE FROM ALL SUPPLIERS

Critter and Bad Bob double team the Black Hawks

Pg. 38 –Kitchener HD Men’s Night. Kaz hangs out with the guys.

ALL LICENSED MECHANICS

Pg. 40 – Hello Fellow Inmates...

Durham’s Dangerous Don is on the loose.

Pg. 43 – From the far East –Ontario that is.

Beau keeps us up to date on the happenings in the East and beyond

Pg. 48 – Calendar Feature Pg. 51 – Riding the Southwest

Guardrail keeps on keeping on ….regardless!

THE RIDER’S MAG 1111 Davis Drive, Suite 501, Unit 23, Newmarket, ON L3Y 9E5 Phone: (905) 235-5353 Toll Free 1-855-873-6680 Fax: (905) 235-5358 Email: rickdavis@theridersmag.com Website: www.theridersmag.com

Publisher / Editor : Rick Davis Publisher Emeritus: Alex J.R. MacRae Editor Emeritus: J.B. Ballantine

Managing Editor: ACE Wolske Creative Content Manager: Peppermint Patty Office Manager: Diane Davis

Advertizing and Sales Eastern Ont./Western Que. Rep: Beau Rooney 613-295-4444 Southern Ontario Rep: J.R. MacRae 905-631-5890 Southwestern Ontario Rep: Tim Armstrong 519-252-9631 Contributing Writers Pastor Dave Neals, Danni, Scary Larry, Manon Kellman, Beau Rooney, Jonathan Musson, Al Marentette, Rossaire, Tim Armstrong, Donny Petersen, Bob Laidlaw, Sherri O’Irish, Al Kasza, Dangerous Donnie, Bad Bob

164 Main Street, Lucan ON N0M 2J0

Pre-Owned Harley Davidson

Sales & Service

PUT SOMETHING

POWERFUL BETWEEN YOUR LEGS!!

Contruibuting Cartoonists Critter, Michael MacDonald Office Security Supplied By: Captain & Morgan “The Wonder Dogs"

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hogtowncycles.ca THE RIDERS MAG -----PAGE 3


What’s

Every Monday

The Checkered Flag Bar and Grill –

3671 Hwy #6, Mount Hope. (At By-Pass) Monday Night Riders Special – 2 for 1 Burgers – Critter’s Crew Cards accepted for a further 13% discount. 905-679-2419

Every Wednesday

Checkered Flag Bar and Grill –

3671 Hwy #6, Mount Hope. (At By-Pass) ½ price Wings Critter’s Crew Cards accepted for a further 13% discount. 905-679-2419

January th

Jan 25 – Rocky’s Harley-Davidson - Get into the cold Win a Harley Mini Fridge, Free Admission 3-5pm

Jan 25th – Hips Cycle 26th Anniversary Open House

At the shop in Brantford 10am – 3pm Everyone Welcome

February

Feb 1st – 2nd – 2014 Ottawa International Motorcycle Show EY Centre – 4899 Uplands Dr., Ottawa, On. More info – ottawainternationalmotorcycleshow.ca

Feb 23rd - Big Al’ s Annual Swap Meet

Dundas Community Center, 10 Market St. Dundas

Shakin’

10am- 3pm $5 admissio, Kids under 12 free More info Call 905-746-7077

Feb. 26th-Clare’s Boot Camp/Garage Party

6:30pm-8:30pm at Clares Niagara, Everything You need To Know About The Sport Of Motorcycling Bring a Buddy, RSVP lisa@ clarescycle.com or 905-684-4647

March

Mar 2nd - Alviston Motorcycle Swap Meet

Alviston Community Center Complex, Alviston 10am - 3pm, $5 Admission, Kids under 12 Free Contact Ken MacDonald at 519-845-0239 or Ontariochildridingbelt@yahoo.ca

Mar. 15th-16th- Spring Motorcycle Show International Centre, Toronto, Sat. 10am-9pm, Sun 10am-

5pm Free Parking, Used Bike Market, Vendors, Dealers, Fashion Shows More Info: 905-771-0132 or motorcyclespringshow.com

April

Apr 12th -13th – 33rd Annual National Motorcycle and Tattoo Show

Exhibition Place, Toronto, Sat: 10am – 9pm, Sun 10am – 5pm More Information: 705-778-2275 or www.nationalmotorcycleshow.com

& Zuber Company LITIGATION

COUNSEL

David A. Zuber, LL.B.

Certified as a Specialist in Civil Litigation

Free Consultation Personal Injury Disability Claims Medical Malpractice Tel: 416.362.5005 Fax: 416.362.5289 THE RIDERS MAG -----PAGE 4

Email: dzuber@zubco.com Website: www.zubco.com


What’s

Apr 26 – Welland County Motorcycle Club – Annual Poki-Barbi-Dan th

2014 Year starting event More Info: wellandcountymotorcycleclub.com

May

May 3rd – Motorcycle Enhancements Customer Appreciation Day 8:30am – 3: 00pm, Join us for our Ride2Reach Charity Ride

May 4th – Fort Erie Motorcycle Swap Meet More Information Contact: 289-686-6797 or www.forteriemotorcycleswapmeet.weebly.com May 25th- Denny’s Spring Motorcycle and Custom Car Night

Denny’s Restaurant, 2208 Bank St. (near Hunt Club) South Keys Plaza, Ottawa, Ontario Proceeds to the Awareness Ride in Support of Traumatic Brain Injury & PTSD Awareness

Shakin’ Alvinston MOTORCYCLE SWAP MEET

Sunday March 2nd, 2014 10 am - 3 pm

Alvinston Community Center Complex Located at junction of Nauvoo Rd (Hwy #79) at Morrell St. Exit 44

Sarnia 402 Hwy 79

Hwy 80

A

June 21st-The Celtic Brotherhood-Awareness Ride For Traumatic Brain Injury & PTSD In The Ottawa Area More Info to follow in upcoming Mags

June 22nd – 4th Annual Bobcaygeon Bike Fest

s nd i W

1 For More Information Contact:

0 r4

o

June

Toronto 401

ton

ns lvi

May 31st-Clare’s Night Of Thunder

At the Niagara Motorcycle Raceway More Info: wellandcountymotorcycleclub.com

London

Ken MacDonald 519-845-0239 ontariochildridingbelt@yahoo.ca

3787 Confederation Line RR#1 Wyoming, ON N0N 1T0

GENERAL ADMISSION $5

Children under 12 free with parent 10 X 10 Spaces $40, Table Spaces $25 Set up time 8am - 10am

Food and Refreshments available through arena confectionary

Fun for the whole Family, 9am – 4pm Music, Food, Vendors & Camping Contact 1-800-318-6173, or www.bikefest.ca

August

July

More Info: wellandcountymotorcycleclub.com

July 12th- Hogtown Baconfest & 2nd Annual Open House Free admission, Western Cheerleaders Bike Wash, Check What’s Shakin’ Next Month For More Details

July 13th-Welland County M.C. 32nd Annual Lime Run More Info: wellandcountymotorcycleclub.com

Aug. 12th-Welland County M.C. Fallen Members Ride

September

Sept. 7th- Denny’s Fall Motorcycle and Custom Car Night

Denny’s Restaurant, 2208 Bank St. (near Hunt Club) South Keys Plaza, Ottawa, Ontario Proceeds to the Awareness Ride in Support of Traumatic Brain Injury & PTSD Awareness

SERVICE AND CUSTOMIZING FOR ALL BRANDS HARLEY-DAVIDSON SUZUKI YAMAHA HONDA KAWASAKI TRIUMPH VICTORY

FOR SERVICE, MAINTENANCE MULTIPLE AWARD WINNING

CUSTOM SHOP 427 SPEERS RD. UNIT 9 OAKVILLE, ONTARIO 905-842-2123

1-888-842-2123

AND CUSTOM WORK www.MotorcycleEnhancements.com THE RIDERS MAG -----PAGE 5


Fighting for Your 2014 roared into Canada on the coattails of an incredible ice storm that devastated many communities in Eastern Ontario before pummeling Quebec and the Maritimes. Following on the heels of that catastrophe was the crushing cold of the ‘Arctic Vortex’. Now there’s a moniker guaranteed to shrivel your Johnson, Eh Ollie? Why is all this important to the bikers of Ontario? These disturbing harbingers of disaster have perhaps set the tone for the upcoming months, which could either be pleasurable or painful for Canadian bikers. As you are probably aware, there are planned elections affecting all levels of government that could prove advantageous in furthering our cause. Never before, in the history of our confederation, have we experienced membership numbers that, collectively, represent a significant force via the votes contained within our confederation. For the past six years the OCC, through its Political Action Committee, has been lobbying the Ontario Liberals to change the law governing restrictions to the High Occupancy Vehicle lanes on the provincial 400 series highways and allow single rider access. Our efforts did provoke face-to-face meetings with the sitting Minister of Transport wherein the government demonstrated their usual indifference to change. At one point Kathleen Wynn, who was the Minister at the time, suggested that there could be a solution to our request – reinvent and designate all HOV lanes as provincial toll lanes. From our standpoint, this was a ludicrous (and totally Liberal) solution. This suggestion reveals that the current government is willing to squash all environmental arguments providing there is a monetary gain in the offing and further reveals that; perhaps their party’s (or perhaps any party who wants to form the next provincial government) standpoint could also be altered should there be a serious effort to push them away from the public trough? It is a shiny new year and our shared OCC resolution is to take a stand to cause change that could enrich our lifestyle and benefit all Ontario bikers. Stay tuned as more about these collective efforts will be featured in upcoming columns. There is a disturbing bit of news reported by The Australian news service - that police in Queensland, Australia have been granted the power to harass bikers riding in groups of three or more riders. Other new laws passed in Australia, allow police to stop, search, and photograph anyone wearing colours and also ban club members from working in tattoo parlours and wearing colours in bars, and under these laws, club members would face a minimum of six months in jail for setting foot in their own clubhouses. These new laws allow police and prosecutors to conduct secret hearings, where club members are compelled to testify before the Crime and Misconduct Commission, and refusal to cooperate has resulted in long jail sentences. WTF!! Has civil liberty gone

THE RIDERS MAG -----PAGE 6

Rights

with Scary Larry

the way of the Dodo Bird down under? Kudos to the B.C. Hells Angels for launching a challenge to the government’s civil forfeiture law, which the government has used to seize clubhouses in three B.C. communities! Hells Angels’ spokesman Rick Ciarniello said his club is fighting “for all British Columbians . . . This legislation should trouble everyone and not just our members . . . Governments everywhere are now routinely using these civil forfeiture laws as a substitute for the criminal process. Most people seem to cave when faced with these forfeiture lawsuits. It is just too expensive and stressful to fight back when faced with the resources of the state.” Source www.vancouversun. com The drafting of these draconian and oppressive measurers further demonstrate that we must be strong and diligent in our efforts to protect our right to enjoy the lifestyle of our choosing. Perhaps we should take a tip from the lyrics by the Five Man Electrical Band - “Signs, Signs, Everywhere there’s signs. Blocking out the scenery. Breaking my mind. Do this! Don’t do that! Can’t you read the signs?” This month’s featured OCC member club is Motorcycle Country R.C. which boasts two chapters, Greater Toronto Area (Brampton) and Kitchener. The club is open to all riders regardless of race, creed or religious persuasion. Their motto is: You give respect – you get respect! The club is not brand specific but emphasizes that members are expected to participate in their organized rides. Motorcycle Country participates in many charity rides - Ride for Sight, Ride for Sick Kids, MS, MADD, and BAD Ride as well as organizing a Xmas Party & Toy Drive which complements the Xmas charitable efforts of Kitchener HD. Check them out at: www.Motorcycle-country.com To most recreational bikers, Politics is an ugly word. It is a confrontation that is to be avoided at all cost. Most of you believe that the government’s purpose is to serve our interests but that is far from reality. There are pressures being applied that may institute changes that will prove unpalatable to most of you - but your wakeup call may come too late to foil the enslavement of the public will. It’s time to take notice and work to forestall the advancing infringements that will restrict your liberties. In this article, I have outlined two unsavory but informative situations that, inadvertently, will somehow touch all our lives. North American Law Enforcement Services are salivating over the prospect of adopting the Australian measures reported herein. Some of you will be nauseated by the possibility of you and three friends . . . rollin’ out on a sunny Sunday morn and sportin’ yur ‘Born to be Bad’ tees - only to be Popo jacked, searched, and photographed. Others will scoff – Yea right, what’s he smokin’? If you’re a clubber you know that some of this is happenin’ in Ontario today soooooo, go ahead, ignore the signs, smirk in disbelief, and stick yur head back in the sand but it’s your bad if that stomach wrenchin’ Aussie freak show becomes an Ontario reality. Edward R. Murrow, one of the world’s most respected newsmen once quoted “A nation of sheep will beget a government of wolves.” An observation that is more relevant today than when it was first uttered. Step up and make a difference! Join the Ontario Confederation of Clubs today. www.occ4u.org Remember, you don’t have to be a clubber to join as we have many Independent like-minded members. Soooo, don’t be a stranger or stranger than you are! Scary Larry OCC Treasurer


On The I was really bummed that I missed getting my on the road column into last months mag but it was that time of year with preparations for Christmas for children and grandchildren then throw in a birthday or two and of course Friday the 13th and what can I say I got my feature article in but couldn’t squeeze out another. So now as our annual feature shoot trip to the southwestern Ontario area draws near its time to canvass all our good readers out that way specifically in the corridor from say London to Windsor, traditionally we head out on a Friday doing shoots along the way looking to get a minimum of 6 – 8 shoots in over the course of the weekend and with retirement we have a little more flexibility in terms of time. As almost always I am hard up for sportsters, vintage bikes, and shovels but all styles which would include late model evo and twin cam mild as well as special construction are welcome and of course all those lady riders out there, get your bike on our list and we will swing by an agreed meeting place and get your pics and story done. And even if you may or may not be available in late April we are usually out that way a couple times a year so do it anyway. Email a picture of your ride to theridersmag@gmail.com along with your geographic location, and a couple methods of contact i.e. email and cell phone for voice or text, land line or whatever you use and we will get you onto our list and set you up, if you don’t hear from us for a while don’t sweat it we quite often do shoots many months and in some cases a year or more in advance, it’s about getting a certain amount of work completed in a certain time period. Even if you’re not in southwestern Ontario don’t hesitate we do Niagara region shoots several times a year as it is our home turf and we travel frequently in the area so the more the merrier out that way and also the Tri city area which we usually visit several times a year as it is close by and we can usually make a two day trip out of it. As for eastern Ontario all I can say is when we have sufficient bikes we make the trip out that way we did one last fall and got about 6 bikes in over the course of a weekend and we only missed out on one who had other plans that weekend but when we have the bikes out that way we will make the trip. Too bad about the London show, wow I knew that the board of governors were a pain in the ass for all these years now for a variety of reasons but predominantly political. Sometimes them dummies forget who brought them the revenue to grow and put up the new buildings that weren’t there as recently as say 15 years ago. Being the good liberals that they are they like to pick winners and losers based on their own self image right? Well there’s a couple shows coming up in March and I would expect to make it to one or both of those this year assuming of course they don’t conflict with my other plans like a march break vacation and the annual feature shoot out in southwestern Ontario, I look forward to seeing my old pal Tim who we missed last trip around cause he says he’s working harder now that he ever did before in his entire life so hopefully he will take a day off to come and say hi and enjoy some freakin beef at Neros, right? I’ve already got a few prospects out Chatham way that I hope pan out lots in the Tri city area and a few out WindsorSarnia way but we need more and more and more, and oh yeah guys you supply the lady for your men’s shoots and yes they must be age of majority please and thank you. There’s

Road

with J.R.

only one Friday the 13th this year in June and I am already juggling my schedule to make sure I am here for all the titties and still make my annual conference in Chicago, what are the odds the Blackhawks will make the finals again this year? Anybody?

See ya out there,... on the road.

Cathy’s Country Kitchen Great Coffee Daily Lunch Specials Home Cooking

Dine In or Take Out

OPEN DAILY 8am - 3pm Peter’s Corners

Phone: 905-628-7820

1305 HWY #5 West

R.R. #1, Dundas On L9H 5E1

THE RIDERS MAG -----PAGE 7


Cruising With Critter DUSTY DEREK

GOOD WITH WOOD Maker of Fine Cabinetry KITCHENS, BARS, WALL UNITS, CLOSET ORGANIZERS

416-277-0427 www.derekmitchellcontractor.ca Well we are into the New Year and I hope you all had a good Christmas and you are arriving in 2014 In good shape and ready for the year ahead. For me 2013 had its ups and downs and an adventure or two thrown my way just to keep me from getting bored or complacent. My knee replacement is scheduled for Feb. 20th at 6:00 AM and while I’m not looking forward to the procedure, I am looking forward to the ability to walk normally and do what I do without the pain that I’ve been experiencing. My trike project is well on its way and I hope to have it ready for the upcoming shows. It is really shaping up and I’m getting anxious. I didn’t escape 2013 without some heartache as my little dog Morgan died the day before Christmas leaving Captain to do Shop and Home security solo while Morgan rests in her little cedar box on a shelf in the window of one of her most favourite spots…..the shop. It does seem strange without her in the little dog bed that still sits to the right of my desk. I miss the songs that we were treated to as she lent harmony with Captain’s vocal gymnastics hitting high notes and low notes with a series of howls and warbles that just amazed us, then culminating in the touching of noses which would either mean the song was over or an agreement on the next verse was reached and the duet would either end abruptly or continue depending on the outcome of that gentle meeting. Captain hasn’t sung since she passed. So it’s not just me. The same day that I was dealing with Morgan’s death I got a call telling me that a good friend Gerry Finlayson had

THE RIDERS MAG -----PAGE 8

suffered a massive heart attack and wasn’t expected to make it. Gerry was a long time, well respected member of the Last Chance MC. and while the family opted for a private family only service at this time, a memorial event will be planned in the future. My condolences to his brothers, friends and family. RIP Gerry! GBNF. I also got word of the passing of Brothers to the End MC member Frank Perri losing his battle with cancer on Jan. 2nd. He will be missed! My condolences to his family, friends, and Club Brothers. Ride on in the World without borders! You will notice that the Bike/Shop of the month Calendar feature is without a recipient this issue. This was due to a scheduling problem and we were just unable to get’r done this time around as it is a new feature and we were unable to get shoots done far enough ahead to allow for miscues so I used a shot that I liked of a friend taken quite a while ago that I hadn’t been able to fit in anywhere before so “Hey Jamie” here you are finally!

Supershow 2014

What better way to kick off the New Year than at Motorcycle Supershow at the International Centre in Mississauga? I was a lot better prepared for the show this year than I was last year as I now have a year under my belt and a solid crew to offer support and make things run smooth. Absent this year was my constant Show mate Alex Sr. who would be baking himself in the sun in Florida while we put up with the snow and record cold up here. Also missing was JR and JB who were also basking in the Florida sun. We would have to struggle through without them. I gave the assignment of writing up the show to our new rising star, the lovely and talented Sherri O Irish but had a few things that I wanted to mention. The weather as mentioned ran the gambit from crappy, to mostly crappy, to full on WTF crappy with Mother Nature having one of her hissy fits and throwing all kinds


Cruising With Critter of ice, snow and extreme cold at us just to test our mettle or just to be bitchy! Whatever we got through it mostly unscathed but Sherri couldn’t make it through the Blizzard on Sunday and I had to carry on in her stead. All in all it was a good show but the weather did affect attendance somewhat. It is good for me to be able to wander the show and talk to our many current advertisers like Motorcycle Enhancements, Hog Town, Fred Hale Motors, AM Sales, ResurreXion Cycles, Terez Leather who were all with us in hall five and then head out into the other Halls to find Brian Greer with a display with his bike and fantastic tin ceiling tiles. Also out for the show were; Tim from Triple K Upholstery, Nash from Leather King and Len from Len’s Automotive in beautiful downtown Jarvis. It is great to have such an enthusiastic crew to help out and a good way to start

the year when you get together with them at a show such as this at the beginning of the year and set the tone for the year ahead and if I read things right we are in for a great season or seasons until we meet back here again in 2015. There was certainly a lot to take in. If you like custom bikes, antique bikes, sport bikes, off-road bikes, trikes, pretty girls, leather, Lawyers, helmets, boots, t shirts, protective clothing, rainsuits, insurance, riding lessons or refresher courses, stuff to treat your leather, places to ride to or people to ride with they were all here! If you just wanted to meet up with friends you hadn’t seen since riding season ended, chance are you’d find them here too! There were destination spots, charity rides, tours of all kinds in this country and beyond all vying for your attention. I thank all the crew who came out to help for whatever time you could give; my grandson My managing editor Al, Nick, Peppermint Patty, Scott, Bad Bob, Manon and Gerry, Beau who came in

THE RIDERS MAG -----PAGE 9


Cruising With Critter from Ottawa, the lovely Sherri O’Irish and the equally lovely Durham Dangerous Don for all your support. Well that will do it for this month and next month at this time I expect I’ll be somewhat incapacitated after my knee surgery and will have made arrangements to get my deliveries done and I won’t be able to attend one of my favourites; Big Al’s Swap meet in Dundas on Feb. 23 and will have someone cover it for me. Beau will be doing the Ottawa Motorcycle Show Feb. 1 – 2 and he has some great plans in the works for the booth. I hear that our girl Danni will be out for that show as well so we will be well represented. Drop in and say hi if you’re out that way. There is still lots of shows and CUSTOM MOTORCYCLES Swap meets and so on to keep us occupied WANT A SPRINGER coming up FRONTEND like Hip’s Open House FOR YOUR Jan. 26th, The EVOLUTION Alvinston Swap MeetMar. SPORTSTER? 2ND The Spring Motorcycle WE’VE GOT ‘EM! Show March 15 – 16, The OR HOW N a t i o n a l Motorcycle and ABOUT THAT show DIAMOND CUT LOOK Tattoo April 12 – 13, then Fort Erie Swap Meet on May 4th “WHEN YOU WANT where Shawn IT CUSTOM” and company have plenty THIS IS THE PLACE of surprises in 4307 BURNHAM ST. N. store for you and intend to COBOURG, ONT. things www.martinscustommotorcycles.com freshen up big time! So martinscustommotorcycles@live.com there is lots to

MARTINS

905-372-1510

THE RIDERS MAG -----PAGE 10

keep you busy and entertained and plenty of opportunity to pick up that missing part to complete a project or get that other goody or bobble that will bring a smile to your or somebody’s face.

John Clare’s 80th Birthday Celebration

I got my invitation and immediately marked it on the calendar as a must attend event. I then called Bad Bob and asked if he would like to come along and he didn’t even hesitate before replying that he was in as he, as I, have a great deal of respect for John Clare. Not just because he is an advertiser and supporter of the Mag but because he is a genuinely nice individual for who motorcycling is more than a business or a hobby, it is the foundation for a life that seems to have evolved from it and around it. Motorcycles, motorcycling and John Clare seem to go hand in hand and one is synonymous with the other. It is evident in his magnificent stores and the way he treats people and if you have any doubts, talk to him and you can’t help but see the passion and the drive in the man who at an age where others may be thinking more along the lines of slowing down, John seems to be looking for another gear with which to garner a bit more speed and more MPLT (Miles per Lifetime) and like the Energizer Bunny, or a Timex watch; he just keeps on going. I picked up Bob and we made our way out to Clare’s Harley Davidson at Niagara on the Lake and parked in the rapidly filling parking lot and wandered on in. The store was full of people even though we were early. I signed the guest book and went off in search of the man of honour who was holding court near the parts counter. I stopped to say hi and wish him a Happy Birthday to which he explained that it wasn’t really his birthday, but a date that could be dedicated to him and worked into scheduling. He is a delight to talk to and his stories are endless and I could listen for as long as he wanted to talk, but I could see people lining up behind me to also talk and congratulate him on his longevity and good life, so I moved off to get some pictures and talk to others who were there. There will be other times I’m sure. They had a duo playing softly to lend a nice mellow feel to the event and there was a birthday cake and snacks as well as coffee and tea and other treats available and the place was rapidly filling up with family, friends and well-wishers as well as staff. We wandered around getting some shots and checking out the large photo-gallery and all the other memorabilia that fill the store with the history surrounding this man who has put


Cruising With Critter

A M SALES family business since 1984 SPECIALIZING IN USED MOTORCYCLES

so much of his life into this lifestyle. I did get to talk to the Lovely Lisa who is a ball of energy and enthusiasm in herself and fits so well here. They announced that John was about to cut the cake and I found a spot from which to get some good shots as John and his family gathered with him as John, smiling and with the ever present twinkle in his eye, plunged the knife into the centre of the cake and left it there. It was a good day and a pleasure to be there to mark an occasion and a milestone in a life, that is in itself an accomplishment but John has made his mark on motorcycling and had an effect on many people, an industry and a lifestyle for 80 years and he shows no signs of stopping or even slowing down so there are still marks to be made and goals to be achieved and maybe that is what the secret to a long and fruitful life really is. Maybe John has discovered the Fountain of Youth and you can ride it? Happy Birthday John, from myself and all of us at The Riders Mag.

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The Rangers MC. 8th Anniversary Party

The Rangers have been inviting me to their parties for years now and each year I’ve said I’d try but something always came up and I was never able to attend. This year they actually gave me a ticket with the comment “Not that you’re actually going to come but here’s a ticket with the address on it so you can’t use those excuses again.” The challenge was on to either go or come up with new and better excuses not that I’d made excuses previously as they were actually valid reasons as I really had wanted to go but I have to deal with the reality that I can’t be everywhere that I’d like to be.

Then I get a message on Facebook as another reminder and I knew that I would have to put all else aside and despite being layout weekend with a pile of work left to do, I cleaned up and drove Downtown (Well actually it was west end Toronto but to us from out of town everything South of the 401 is Downtown.) I have to tell you it was well worth the trip! These guys know how to throw a party and judging from the attendance, it is not a secret! Parking was a bit of a problem requiring circling the block twice to find a spot somewhat close to the Hall. I’m sure there were spots closer but I haven’t been in this neighbourhood in years. But I did manage to find a spot and gathered up my cane and trusty Nikon and headed to the party. After warm greetings at the door I got some drink tickets

THE RIDERS MAG -----PAGE 11


Cruising With Critter and wandered off in search of the bar. This took a while as the place was packed with people I knew and you can’t just walk past people you know without stopping to shake hands, hugs, exchange stories and get updates on what has been going on in each other’s lives since we last talked and if I wasn’t thirsty before, I was now. I made it there secured a cold beer and went off in search of more friends and acquaintances which as I mentioned wasn’t very hard as they were everywhere! They had a great band with a fantastic front man Tommy Rocker and the Classic Rock Show who put on a Hell of a show that kept everyone entertained. Now I have to get to the food part. They put on one Hell of a buffet and there was mountains of food spread

THE RIDERS MAG -----PAGE 12

out on huge tables down the centre of the Hall. The tantalizing aroma hung in the air and to me it was inviting and comforting aroma that wafted through the place but I could see people perk up as soon as they started laying it out and the first whiff of the feast that lay ahead was like blood in the water of a shark tank. Being new to this party I didn’t know how great this great food was and the reputation these guys have built around their ability to put on an “over the top” buffet but everyone else sure did and when the go ahead for food was given it was instant line up! Boom! An old guy with a cane didn’t stand a chance against these seasoned and savvy “Rangers Party veterans” but I wasn’t worried because, as I said, there was a mountain of food there. Little did I know! That mountain of food stood less of a chance than an old guy with a cane and the mountain of food was soon diminished into empty and near


Cruising With Critter empty serving containers! When I finally made my way to the table the pickings were pretty slim but the remnants still made up enough to feed an old guy with a cane. It seems though, the Rangers are a cleaver and resourceful crew and know the voracity of their guests quite well and they then announced that that was only round one for the buffet and more food was on the way! Next time I’ll have to wander closer to the buffet tables as they are laying it out and circle like a shark until they give the go ahead. I’m old but not too old to learn! This was a lesson worth learning! I pretty much moved from table to table for the rest of the night visiting with all that I could. I was happy to see Donny Peterson out enjoying the night. Lazslo said he was going to set up a photo op and have a member of each Club in attendance gather at the stage area pose for a group shot and while not an easy task, true to his word, he got it done and I got some good shots. It was getting late and I knew that the work fairy wasn’t going to appear in the shop while I was out and complete all the work I still had to do so I said my goodbyes and made my way to the door. It was still lined up with people coming in with more clubs that wouldn’t make the group picture this time around but there is always next year and next year’s party is going to be marked as a must attend and I’ll stick a memo to myself to hover around the buffet table and practice my swooping techniques! Thanks guys! Great night! Great party! See you next year! Happy Anniversary!

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Motorcycle Supershow 2014 NOBODY HATES WINTER LIKE A BIKER!

Braving the sub zero temperatures, the Riders Mag Crew, made their way to the January International Motorcycle Show 2014, in Mississauga. Friday started off a little slow, due to the frigid weather, but still, many people came to check things out, before the weekend crowds packed the halls. This was also a great opportunity, as Critter slung a camera around my neck, to introduce me to many of his friends, and contributing advertisers such as the fine folks at Hogtown Cycles and Motorcycle Enhancements, to name a few. It was a slow process, as we could barely walk 20 ft., without someone coming to catch up with Critter, or stopping to take a photo of some of the amazing bikes on display, and we weren’t even out of Hall 5 yet. Here, it showcased builders, designers, fabricators, painter/artists, and owners of some of the finest show bikes around, all vying for coveted trophies. Things progressed more quickly, as we proceeded through the rest of the halls, and stopped to chat with the Black Gold crew and others. Many riding clubs and charities were promoting their fundraising events, along with

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the spots for riding tourism, which is growing in leaps and bounds in popularity. Motorcycle awareness and course providers, were on hand for those thinking of getting into riding, and Motocross teams and racing stars were available for kids to meet and greet. For people looking to buy, there were many manufacturers, dealers (new and used), and a used bike market. Saturday’s crowd was much improved, even though the weather had not, the sun made it bearable. Reinforcements were called in to help hand out the Mag, Manon, Patty, Scott and I all manned the station with Al and Critter at one point or another. I got to meet some of the other writers, such as Manon, Danni and Motorcyco Beau, who I can finally put a face to their names. During the day and night, there were stylish fashion

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shows by Terez Leathers and the Dymes Calender Girls, and live performances by The Carpet Frogs, a band out of Toronto. Along with posing models, there were guest models like Mandy Monroe and the Canadian Hotties, signing posters and calendars. Many different motorcycle clubs, came out to the show as well, and of course, the plain clothed BEU guys were there, to get their first pics of the new year.


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During the weekend, the Motorcycle Awards of Excellence (MAX), were handed out to the winners of this show, for Canadian Racing champions, Achievements, Media, and Sponsorship, while the Canada Cup Championships, honor the best in class, specialty, and artistry for the year. After the hard winter we’ve had so far, it was nice to see the glimmer in peoples’ eyes, as they wandered around their passion or interest in motorcycles. For some, the dream of getting a bike this year, will become a reality. For others, the wheels are in motion, and a ‘must have’ or ‘to do’ list ensues, so that when the snow

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Falcons MC Support The Troops Bash 2013

by Tim

I must say I was thrilled to get the assignment of covering the 6th Annual Support the Troops Bash. Even though I woke that morning experiencing some pretty nasty back pains, I wasn’t missing this one even if I had to rely on the cage. Our new contributing writer Guardrail, who has contributed greatly, had just undergone a rather serious medical procedure with a lengthily hospital stay. I was glad to step up and cover the

weekend events while he recovers. The “Support the Troops Bash” is hosted by Moose and the boys with the London Chapter of the Falcons M.C. Veterans Canada and is considered the kick-off party to the “Run to the North Wall” scheduled for the following day. Included in the price of admission is a prime BBQ steak dinner complete with everything else you’ll ever need to satisfy a growling gut and free on-site camping. They also have a number of door prizes up for grabs and 50/50 draws as well. This year I went home with a righteous bottle of wine with a “Fallen but not Forgotten” label with the Flanders Field literature on the back. I believe this was brewed and bottled by Windsor’s Doc. There were a lot of great door prizes including a generous contribution of signed memorabilia from NHL’s Brandon Prust who is very supportive in respect to Veterans affairs. Also, back by popular demand and providing the live entertainment was the Tyler Wilson Band who knows how to entertain a crowd. Any and all proceeds generated by the Support the Troops bash are awarded to chosen Veterans causes that would normally not see funding. There are no administrators and such that chew up a good portion of your contribution; it all goes to the cause. Worthy of the support indeed! The venue for this bash is at Fred and

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Falcons MC Support The Troops Bash 2013

by Tim

Jan’s farm situated on County Rd 46 near Puce Rd in Essex and is the ideal location for the locals and out-of-towner’s to meet up, pitch a tent and get ready for a hell of a good time in good company. And it’s a synch to find! There is usually some form of marker at the entrance of the property and this year it was a Jeep with wicked Veteran’s support paint work. In attendance again this year was the Schneider’s Support

Prospects and all these guys deserve a hand for their contributions in making the outing go smoothly. They volunteered and took care of everything from selling support wears and tickets, cleaning tables, helping the chef with food prep,

Our Troops rig (last year’s marker) but with all the rain we have been experiencing, the grounds were saturated and he had no choice but to park in the lot. Rain or shine the event carries on and this year the weather was fantastic with temperature in the upper 70’s F. In years past it’s been in the high 90’s F and humid as hell so I was enjoying the day. Members of the Falcons M.C. Veterans Canada are all active or retired Military personnel and all ride nothing but North American V-Twin iron. The Falcons M.C. actually originated back in Germany in the late 60’s and over the years grew to become Europe’s largest club before our troops were eventually pulled from Germany. The Falcons M.C. Veterans Canada has 2 current members that were members back in the day they were stationed in Germany. One being Tanker from Windsor’s Chapter and the other is Sultan who again made the trek from Red Dear Alberta and he was wearing his patch from his days in Germany. Again this year Sultan was recognized with a plaque for being the member that travelled the furthest to make the event. Each Chapter brought along

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 19



Falcons MC Support The Troops Bash 2013

by Tim

making sure the coolers were filled and most important of all, making sure you had an ice cold frosty-one in your hand at all times. The guys did recognize the efforts of the Prospects and they were rewarded with their own personal washroom facilities. For the life of me I couldn’t figure out why there was different color port-apotties. It wasn’t until Jay came out of the odd color one in celebration with raised hands and he was met by a round of applause that I realized the pink one was theirs only. Even then my pal Tony had to tell me that the sign on the door said Prospects only. I need new glasses! I mention Jay because he is one of the Prospects that I personally know. I met Jay a while back when he first returned from his last tour of Afghanistan. He is the nephew of my long time good buddy and Brother-from-another-Mother, Gilles...so basically he’s family. The North Wall Rider’s Association with Chapter’s in Windsor and Hamilton had a large showing and they rolled in just in time for the BBQ steak dinner. It was also good to see George Winney from Forever Free Motorcycle Hearst Services in attendance. He is a Veteran and active member of the North Wall Rider’s Association. With their large showing the NWRA was recognized with a plaque at day’s end for having the largest number of members in attendance. There were a number of Veteran Clubs in attendance including one of the newest, the Coalition Crew with representatives from Mississauga and Sudbury. To attend the annual Support the Troops Bash you don’t have to be a Veteran or a member in a Veterans Club. All you have to do is show up with the willingness to have a great time and be sure to bring along the sense of humour. I heard of some of the memorable comedic moments of last year’s late night antics one of

them was a report of a guy watching the band play wearing nothing but combat boots and hat and a fluorescent limegreen cock-sock. Although nobody admittedly got a look at his smiling face it’s believed he had a moniker that reflects the largest state in the US. On the map that’s Texas! I won’t tell you any of the other antics as there is such a thing as a time and place...you’ll have to come out next year and create your own memorable moments. Support our Troops In Essex Tim

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 21


Run to the North Wall XVIII

Staging for the annual North Wall run was again at the Royal Canadian Legion Branch 594 at their new digs on Howard just south of County Rd 8 and the Run departed at 11:00am sharp. The arrangement for the day made with my buddy Big B was simply a 9:00am departure from my place. The folks at the Legion serve up a wickedly generous breakfast and the earlier we get there the better our chances of having the complete big pig feast. The Run to the North Wall is presented by the guys with the North Wall Riders Association and the event coexists with the Canadian Vietnam Veterans Memorial Association’s traditional services. Canadian Vietnam Veterans Memorial known as “The

by Tim

North Wall” honours those Canadian citizens who served the U.S. forces during the Vietnam conflict and paid the ultimate price. The name of each and every confirmed soldier that paid the ultimate price during the Vietnam war is forever etched in granite. The scheduled route for the Run was planned as years past and we left on schedule with an impressive show of support. The numbers in attendance was impressive considering the less than desirable wet weather as of late. With all the construction in the area with the major Parkway being built, new rules come into effect as well. This year it was difficult for organizers getting a Police escort until we reached the new City enforcement limits. The pack was sure to be scrambled a bit with all the

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Run to the North Wall XVIII

detours and lights there were to deal with but Windsor’s finest picked us up at the Sandwich and EC Row intersection. From there they did a great job and managed to corral us back into one pack just in time for our approach at the North Wall. Arriving at The North Wall we were met by members of the Canadian Vietnam Veterans Memorial Association, Korea dignitaries, local politicians, Veterans and a number of Veteran supporters and of course our very own Guardrail. This year he couldn’t partake in the actual Run due to doctor’s orders. Just days earlier he was released from the hospital after undergoing some serious stuff but he was on hand offering no-charge ice cold bottled water as well as the most current issue of The Rider’s Mag. Also have to thank him for his aid in presenting The Rider’s Mag wreath during this year’s ceremony. We were also met by friends, Korea War Veterans Henry Martinak and Bernie Cote my proclaimed adopted Pop’s.

If you’re a regular reader of the Mag you will know we have a memorable past. It was like a gift that keeps giving and it was a great experience for all. Henry is the individual that campaigned and arranged funding for the Korea War Veterans M e m o r i a l situated at the west side of Dieppe Park on Windsor’s water front. You’re the Man Henry and thank you. Big thanks are in order for CUPE and the City of Windsor workers for donating their personal time and expertise. They put in long

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THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 23


Run to the North Wall XVIII

by Tim

Memorial and his name forever etched in granite to be remembered generations Is a criminal record limiting your for to come. There to be career or travel opportunities? seems a growing number of Clubs, Associations and Organizations presenting wreaths and that Confidential. Reasonable. was impressive to Please Call Denise @ (905) 866-4272 see. Following the ceremony, all were invited back to the Royal Canadian Legion Branch 143 in Windsor for a BBQ and social gathering with 50/50 draws and raffles. Also taking place each year at sun down is a candlelight ceremony where each and every name of the fallen soldiers etched on the North Wall is announced. In Windsor Tim

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Joke Easter Sunday School The pastor of this Baptist church had called all of the little children to the front of the church, dressed in their cute Easter outfits and had them sit around him. He said “Today is Easter and you all look so handsome and beautiful. Today we’re going to talk about the resurrection. Does anyone know what the resurrection is?” One little boy raised his hand, and the pastor said “Please tell us what the resurrection is”. The boy, proud that he knew the answer, said in a clear loud voice “When you get one lasting more than four hours, you gotta call a doctor!” What’s with the Spoon? Last week, we took some friends to a new restaurant, ‘Steve’s Place,’ and noticed that the waiter who took our order carried a spoon in his shirt pocket. It seemed a little strange. When the busboy brought our water and utensils, I observed that he also had a spoon in his shirt pocket. Then I looked around and saw that all the staff had spoons in their pockets. When the waiter came back to serve our soup I inquired, ‘Why the spoon?’ ‘Well, ‘he explained,’the restaurant’s owner hired Andersen Consulting to revamp all of our processes. After several months of analysis, they concluded

Page that the spoon was the most frequently dropped utensil. It represents a drop frequency of approximately 3 spoons per table per hour. If our personnel are better prepared, we can reduce the number of trips back to the kitchen and save 15 man-hours per shift. As luck would have it, I dropped my spoon and he replaced it with his spare. ‘I’ll get another spoon next time I go to the kitchen instead of making an extra trip to get it right now.’ I was impressed. I also noticed that there was a string hanging out of the waiter’s fly. Looking around, I saw that all of the waiters had the same string hanging from their flies. So, before he walked off, I asked the waiter, ‘Excuse me, but can you tell me why you have that string right there?’ “Oh, certainly!’ Then he lowered his voice. ‘Not everyone is so observant. That consulting firm I mentioned also learned that we can save time in the restroom. By tying this string to the tip of our you-know-what, we can pull it out without touching it and eliminate the need to wash our hands, shortening the time spent in the restroom by 76.39%.’ I asked quietly, ‘After you get it out, how do you put it back?’ ‘Well,’ he whispered, ‘I don’t know about the others, but I use the spoon.

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 25


Joke The Patient A woman called a local hospital. “Hello. Could you connect me to the person who gives information about patients. I’d like to find out if a patient is getting better, doing as expected, or getting worse.” The voice on the other end said, “What is the patient’s name and room number?” “Sarah Finkel, room 302.” “I’ll connect you with the nursing station.” “3-A Nursing Station, How can I help You?” “I’d like to know the condition of Sarah Finkel in room 302.” “Just a moment, Let me look at her records. Mrs. Finkel is doing very well. In fact, she’s had two full meals, her blood pressure is fine. She is to be taken off the heart monitor in a couple of hours and, if she continues this improvement, Dr. Cohen is going to send her home Tuesday at noon.” The woman said, “What a relief! Oh, that’s fantastic... that’s wonderful news!” The nurse said, “From your enthusiasm, I take it you are a close family member or a very close friend!” “Neither! I’m Sarah Finkel in 302, Nobody here tells me crap!” The Alaskan Car Buyer A man from Alaska bought a new car in Washington state. After driving his new car back to his home in Alaska, he discovered that he had an oil leak. He contacted the dealership in Washington and they agreed to send a me-

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 26

Page

chanic to his home to repair his new car. When the mechanic arrived at the man’s house he looked under the car and then went and knocked on the man’s door. When the man opened the door, the mechanic said “Looks like you blew a seal!” The man said “No, that’s just mayonnaise from my sandwich.” The Blind Man A Nun was taking a shower one day and she heard the doorbell ring, she yelled “Who is it?” And the person ringing the doorbell yelled, “I’m the blind


Joke

Page

man.” So the Nun got out of the shower and wrapped her hair in a towel, she didn’t bother putting a towel around herself because the person behind the door was blind. She opened the door and said, “What do you want?” The man looked her up and down and answered, “I’m here to put up your new blinds.” Several days ago as I left a meeting at our church, I desperately gave myself a personal TSA pat down. I was looking for my keys. They were not in my pockets. A quick search in the meeting room revealed nothing. Suddenly I realized, I must have left them in the car. Frantically, I headed for the parking lot. My wife has scolded me many times for leaving the keys in the ignition. My theory is the ignition is the best place not to lose them. Her theory is that the car will be stolen. As I burst through the doors of the church, I came to a terrifying conclusion. Her theory was right. The parking lot was empty. I immediately called the police. I gave them my location, confessed that I had left my keys in the car, and that it had been stolen. Then I made the most difficult call of all. “Honey,” I stammered. I always call her “Honey” in times like these. “I left my keys in the car, and it has been stolen. “

There was a period of silence. I thought the call had been dropped, but then I heard her voice. “Idiot”, she barked, “I dropped you off!” Now it was my time to be silent. Embarrassed, I said, “Well, come and get me. “ She retorted, “I will, as soon as I convince this policeman I have not stolen your car. “ Yep it’s getting like that; The golden years Recently, when I went to McDonald’s I saw on the menu that you could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets. I asked for a half dozen Continued Page 53 nuggets. ‘

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Old Skool Chopper

This month’s feature guy is Mark the creation you see before you started out life as a brand new 2000 FXWDG wide glide in Red purchased brand new in 1981. Mark started riding early, he was one of those guys that got his bike license before he got his car license. His dad was a committed rider as well and when Mark told his father he was gonna get his car license he said why the heck would you want to do that when you could ride a bike? Well Mark started on a 1969 Triumph Bonneville which he bought at age 17 and rode for years and says that after a large number of accidents involving the insurance company writing off the bike and paying him cash to replace it that he would go and buy his old bike back from the sole wrecking yard aptly called Recycled Cycles along with the parts and he would rebuild the bike and make it better than before until the next accident. Mark says that it was in this

THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 28

fashion that he was able to get to his first Harley which he picked up at the wrecking yard, it was a 1968 Police Special that had been tricked out into an old school chopper with the windshield removed. The frame raked and kicked out front fender removed and rear fender bobbed with the taillight mounted onto the rear axle and a sissy bar to carry the gear around. He truly loved that bike and says he kept that bike for as long as he could, as he got married and had a kid, and as we all know the bike becomes a little impractical as a method of


Old Skool Chopper transportation when you are in those circumstances the first thing to go is the bike. Mark says that he really regrets getting rid of that bike as he loved it so, being one of those old school riders who has a love of shovels or in his case his first Harley which he did covert back into the FL style bike that it had started out life as with the shovel bags windshield and 16” wheels. The worst part he says was that they split up not long after he sold his beloved shovel. He says once all the paperwork was finalized he got to work on repairing his finances and got all his ducks in a row and decided that he really missed his bike and needed to get back onto the road again. He headed over to his local Harley dealer to check out what was on the show room floor settling on a one year old brand new Dyna Wide Glide saying that it was the only bike that he really fit on and of course it looked absolutely nothing like the bike you see pictured here. Remembering Marks love of his first Harley the chopped police special he decided that he wanted to make himself a totally personalized bike out of the bike he had purchased brand new, saying that once he got past that one year rule on warranty that the bike was never again returned to the dealership but wrenched on in his own garage. From what he tells me that have been some major renovations to this bike and some incredibly original ideas applied to it. Mark got his hands on one of those aftermarket parts catalogues that’s about as big as a phone book and started looking at what was available for his ride keeping in mind that his goal was to build himself an old school chopper akin to his 68 shovel. He wanted a really long front end so that was one of the first things on his agenda was an 8” over front

end, replacing both the stock 21” laced front wheel and the 16” disc rear with 80 spoke laced wheels, high tech brake rotors and calipers. Of course the factory mini apes where replaced with what appear to be either Decker bars or fat boy I guess depending on your perspective, he wanted a real different look on the headlight and I think you will agree he achieved that unique look mounting his headlight onto a 3/8” stainless steel tube which he had chrome plated, but the real ingenuity is in the stash tube and lighter setup. We all know what a stash tube implies but Mark says that its ideal for storing his smokes and he took one of the old signal lights from the factory bike and mounted it on the triple trees, saying that a sportster points cover was an exact fit on the signal light housing. He drilled a hole large enough for a cigar lighter and located a chrome unit in a wrecking yard and wired it into his custom setup, slick man really slick.

His seat was customized by Tim at Triple K saying that he wanted a bit more leg room for himself and his lady Kelly, whom you see modeling on the bike, needed a little less room as she was often sliding back and forth between the sissy bar and his back so Tim fixed up the seat matching it up with their respective butts for comfort as they do travel. Mark says he really wanted to showcase the engine so he raised the gas tank up by 3” at the back and 1-1/2” on the front so he could also better polish his chrome rocker boxes. He says that he did this in concert with replacing the fenders and having the custom paint applied. He is very pleased with the results although he says he has lost all of his reserve mileage and if he ever repaints again he will move the fuel line tube to the rear of the tank to recover that lost fuel. This last bit of work happened about 3 years ago and Mark says that he is finished with this bike which he averages nearly 10 k’s a year of riding, the only thing he would change at this point is the sissy bar saying it he could find or make a larger one that would be the only thing he would change. As for future plans he says that his father gave him his old triumph which he passed along to his son a few years ago, the boy tore it down then let it sit for 2 riding seasons. Mark says if he doesn’t get to work on it this winter he is taking it back and getting it all put back together and ready to ride, also he says that he’s in the market for another 1966-1968 FL in any condition so he can build himself that bike that he wishes he had never sold in the first place.

THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 29


Bikers Church Welcome to Eternity Over the past few months I have found myself doing funerals and I have been asked what’s for me after I die. Well my answer to that question you will either be enjoying a personal welcome from Christ or catching your first glimpse of gloom as you have never seen before. Either way your future will be irrevocable fixed and externally unchangeable. I have read books that we may see persons that we talk to daily as ugly creatures which, if you were to see it now it would probably resemble a horror and corrupt creature you would meet in a nightmare. I am sure we would not want to be Owner: Mark S Rake: +3’ spending eternity in that kind of environment. Those who find City: Hamilton, ON Stretch: none ourselves in Heaven will be surrounded by friends whom we Other Alterations: Cigar have known on earth. Friendships interrupted by death will 883General Lighter continue where they left off. Every description of heaven that Year & Make: 2000 Wide Rear Suspension: Progreswe have heard will pale in the light of reality, forever. Glide sive Others, indeed many others, will be shrouded in the Model: FXWDG darkness, a region of deprivation and upending regret. There, Fabrication by: Owner Accessories with their memories and feelings intact, Images of their life on Value: $20,000 Handlebars: H-D earth will return and haunt them. They will think back to their Time: 2 years Controls: Custom Chrome friends, family and relatives, they will brood over opportunities Chrome: Cambridge Custom Seat: 2up mounted w/quick they squandered and intuitively know that their future is both release passenger backrest hopeless and unending. For them death will be far worse than Engine Tailight: Kuryakyn Tombthey have imagined. Year: 2000 stone And so while relatives plan your funeral ding where you Model: TC88 Turn Signals: Kuryakyn will reside in a casket or an urn, and a burial plot, who the Builder: H-D Electrics: H-D pallbearers will be, you will be more alive than you ever have Displacement: 88 C.I. Oil Tank: Chrome been. You will either see God in his throne room surrounded Lower end: H-D Gas Tank: H-D Modified and by angels and redeemed, or you will feel an indescribable Pistons: H-D lifted weight of guilt and abandonment. There is no destination Rods: H-D Front Pegs: Kuryakyn between these two extremes, just gladness or gloom. Flywheels: H-D Rear Pegs: Kuryakyn Nor will it be possible to transfer because you demonstrated Balancing: H-D Foot Controls: Kuryakyn 3” good behavior from one region to another. No matter how Cylinders: H-D forward endless the ages, no matter how heartfelt the cries, no matter Cases: H-D Grips: Kuryakyn how intense the cries, no matter how intense the suffering, Heads: H-D Headlight: Custom your travel, plans are limited to your present abode. They will Valves: H-D Speedometer: H-D discover that the beautiful words spoke at your funeral were Cam: H-D Mirrors: Custom Chrome not even close, to your new found world. If only your friends Lifters: H-D Primary Cover: H-D could see you now! Ignition: H-D Just before Christmas I presided for a young man with 2 Coils/Wires: H-D Front End children, 39 years old, died of Lung Cancer. The triumph of the Carb: S&S Super G Type: Custom family was striking; there was irrepressible joy mixed with the Air Cleaner: Kuryakyn Year: 2001 sorrow. Pipes: VH with custom muf- Extension: 8” over You and I will follow him to the grave, Unless Christ returns flers Special Features: +3” Raked in our lifetime , we shall all pass through to the grave the trees same way through the iron gate described by Hamlet as the Transmission undiscovered country from where you were born / No Traveler Year: 2000 Wheels returns! Make: H-D Front Thinking about your final destination gives us perspective. Type: 5 Speed Size: 21” Visualize a measuring tape extending from earth to farthest Shifting: Foot Type: 80 Spoke star. Our stay here is but a hairline, almost invisible to the length Clutch: H-D Tire: Dunlop of the tape. Strictly speaking, no distance, can be compared Primary Drive: H-D Brake: H-D to eternity. No matter how endless we visualize eternity to Fender: Modified Blank be. Everyone one of us wants to make wise investments to Painting get the biggest bang for a buck, as the saying goes. The best Paint: Yellow Base Rear investments are those that are safe and permanent. Type: Enamel Size: 16” Death our enemy, can be our friend when God gives us that Painter: Erkrick Inc Type: 100 Spoke Radial final call. We can be glad He has given us a shaft of light to Tire: Metzler illumine the darkness. Death is not a hopeless plunge into the Frame Brakes: H-D unknown. Year: 2000 Fender: Modified Blank So! What can you expect one minute after you die? Builder: H-D Pastor Dave Type: Swing Arm Model: Kelly daveneals@bikerschurch.com

Old Skool Chopper

THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 30


Road Scribes The Barfly

she sat alone always in the corner surrounded by noise so she could not hear thoughts racing ear to ear anesthetized her pain disappeared another shot another beer she barely saw the man standing there but on the dance floor swaying like a goddess her dreams came to life her knight in shining armor would claim her as his wife if only for a moment she mattered to a stranger in the darkness of the night Shadow-Wolf of the Shire©10.28.2013 \mswm Road Scribe of America ™

Self Portrait

Outlaw, Angel Sinner, Saint Words upon paper Pictures I paint Life in the wind As canvas and brush No longer applied In the heat of a rush Ridden, written Penned, erased Youth’s reckless abandon Time has replaced Re-ride, rewrite Roads of my past A ‘canvas’ retouched This time, to last ©2013LP Scerri RSOA ™

The Pair

Rusted rims Flat Black Tank Hell to ride A bitch to crank Still she carries him Down the road She eases his mind She lightens his load Her Gypsy soul Burns through him like a lamp The ragged ol’ bike And the ol’ Scooter Tramp © Bob “Bikerwolf” Bryant RSOA ™

Please Stay

I wonder at dusk not knowing will the moon still rise as I wonder why I’m always lost within your eyes thinking as that moonlight finally appears how easily your presence stills my deepest fear the fear that someday you will go and I’ll be left alone when you become a memory and I am on my own a broken spirit unable to speak unwilling to venture out questioning my existence continuing in doubt when suddenly I feel your touch and I realize you are near and just as you have always done again you still my fear please stay © JoPo 2/1/13 Road Scribes of America ™

of America Withdrawal

Need for speed Gotta have some wind Call it a vice Or say it’s a sin I’m a two wheel junkie And I need my fix Feeling better now As I twist the wick © Eddie Sorez Road Scribes Of America ™

Sanity Restored

love that sound of idling thunder then that snap into first gear the feel of power rolling forward when the road ahead is clear wind rushing past and with it my cares each mile brings more relief worries seem to evaporate and time is the only thief winding roads and no destination the ride it’s own reward craziness loosens it’s grip a bit of sanity restored © JoPo Jan. 2013 Road Scribes of America ™ 2012

Scooter Tramp LP Scerri

Of God and demons He’s prone to preach Wrestling with both Enveloping each A portrait in progress Snapshot in time When being a man Wasn’t a crime He fought for our Freedom Gave it his best Made peace with nightmares That haunted his rest The road is an ally, The wind, his friend He welcomes their counsel Finds peace within Societal outcast Embodying a sect A sub culture icon Cause and effect Hobo of the Highway Upon an asphalt rail Referred to as Scooter Tramp Along a vagabond trail © 2012 LP Scerri RSOA ™ www.AsphaltRange.com

THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 31


Riding Dubai with Donny

Leaving for Cairo and then Bike Week in Dubai.

Egypt is safe if not taking pics of unrest or injecting yourself into the fray to help the losing side...like two Canadians recently found out. Oh yeah, and if you are effeminate like this gay couple; that does not go over well either in a Muslim state; except when they lock you up. From donny’s Biker Street Smarts survival manual. It is 10 ½ hours by plane to Cairo from Toronto; 12 ½ hours coming home. It is always a pleasure to get away from North American processed crap food full of all kinds of things not good for the human body. I knew I would like Egyptian food without ever having tasted it. Healthy, nutritious, and delicious as is the food of all Mediterranean countries. As I expected, the people are hospitable and nice. They are also passionate, so staying out of their internal affairs is a good idea....and then there are the fundamentalists....not so nice. As I step off the plane in Cairo in the morning mist, I smell smoke...from the protests and riots?....maybe not, the same smell pervades South Africa where the poor use wood for heating and cooking. Wow, a T-shirt and shorts is foreign dress in Egypt. I am the only one wearing either...guess I am showing too much skin. Every time I look around people are staring at my exposed legs. Good thing I am used to being different From Cairo it is another 3 ½ hours southeast to Dubai in the United Arab Emirates (UAE) on the Indian Ocean. I am meeting my friend Egil who is flying in from Norway. We begin to fly over the vastness of North Africa and across Saudi Arabia’s desert scape to reach Dubai. From the air, hundreds of ocean going freighters dot the blue sea. From the plane, Dubai is sand brown, slightly lighter in color than the surrounding desert. Multilane highways crisscross this small Arab Emirate and disappear into endless sand. There is a haze, I don’t even see the world’s tallest

building (808 meters), the Burj Khalifa until near landing. The Red Falcons MC Dubai await to pick me up and take me to their bike shop/clubhouse. Let the games begin! The Red Falcon is an eagle sized predator that the Arabs use for hunting. The Independent Riders MC are riding 1400 kilometers from Jeddah through Riyadh Saudi Arabia across the desert for the party. Members and friends arriving every few hours from Europe and other places....More clubs from Indonesia and Philippines are coming. We get our bikes from Harley-Davidson Dubai and ride around the city in 32 degree heat. Stop at the base of the Burj Khalifa... impressive. Gamblers from India try to commit suicide off the top when they lose their wages. Some are not successful as the building is stepped so ya gotta pick yer spot or you wind up with severely broken body but alive to suffer some more. We ride back to the clubhouse to meet an incoming charter of the Saudi Red Falcons. They started a midnight to ride much of the desert before daybreak. No lights....must be a wild trip. They ride 14 hours straight. The real hazard is wandering camels. Two friends from Luxembourg and one from Belgrade join us.

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by Donny Petersen

Dubai Women

The Dubai women do not like Western women for three reasons. The first is that Western dress is offensive to their values and their religion. Secondly, the women here feel that Western women exposing skin, no matter how little, is an unfair competitive advantage to getting men. Thirdly, as explained to me by a local, the women of Dubai are “entitled”, and the men hate it. So, some men look for wives and girlfriends from other countries. Some women of Dubai will phone the police on a Western woman if offended by their dress or mannerisms. The police will pick and detain the Western woman and will usually let them go after a warning. If the Western woman gets offended and argues too much with the police...they simply deport her.

Rule One

If a foreigner, do not disrespect or argue with the police or you will find yourself on an airplane. No court and no appeal. Sound bad? I felt free in this dictatorship not like at home in our democratic police state. The


Riding Dubai with Donny police do not dress in intimidating uniforms with weapons. Their SUV’s blend in. They are polite, talk softly but are firm. Of course, I watched this as we were never stopped nor did they even look at us. They only respond if seeing a crime or to a complaint. The Muslim people are friendly, courteous, and helpful. The United Arab Emirates, is the most modern and progressive Arab states. If looking at the ceiling of any public or hotel room, there will be a discreet arrow pointing to Mecca for prayers.

by Donny Petersen

298 Colborne St.

Skiing in a Burqua: Quite a sight

We went to the world’s biggest indoor ski hill today (32 degrees C outside) beside the world’s biggest and possibly most expensive luxury mall. The women inside were wearing burquas. One was skiing with a full burqua and dark sunglasses covering the only exposed part of her body...her eyes. It could have been a man for all we know.

The Wolf Pack goes Swimming

The sheikh has built hundreds of exotic towers that resemble modern works of art. He has also built the Palm Tree, an extension into the ocean that shapes like a palm tree if viewed from a plane. At the ends of the palm fronds is the gambling resort Atlantis and the world’s biggest seaquarium. Everything this guy does is the biggest or best. The palm trunk has a highway and monorail system in the center and tower condos on either side with luxurious pure white sand beachfronts. Everything will seem so ordinary at home. We leave the clubhouse for brunch on the beach. The wolf pack snakes through Dubai to the base of the Palm where we eat, drink and are merry. We then ride out the palm trunk to Atlantis. Each of the fronds has deluxe housing and the never ending beach front.

The Gold Machine

I kept hearing about the gold machine. A vending machine that sells gold bars… only in Dubai and where else but Atlantis. It is in the lobby with a lineup of people buying gold with their credit cards from a vending machine. Women love me… especially if they are old and fat. I have broached a new frontier; Nuns in a Muslim State at a gambling resort, start whispering and shyly smile when we roar in on our bikes. … They are sticking out their tits for us and showing their ankles for the bad guys. We then mount our bikes and ride to a beach beside the Burj el Arab, the world’s only 7-star hotel. The Burj is instantly recognizable since it it shaped like a sail. A bunch of us dive into the turquoise waters of the Indian Ocean. The temperature is 38 degrees Celsius and the water is almost as warm. For the second night we are off to Bike Week festivities. I’ve been to bike shows and competed in them my whole life and are bored by them… but its hot and there is cold beer.

Pack ride to Oman

Looking for adventure and it is all coming my way. We leave for a desert ride and the mountains to the north. We are going to ride through Oman, the next country north of the Arab Emirates (Dubai, Abu Dhabi). Border guards armed with machine guns wave the pack through as they check the cars and their owners passports. Once again, I feel a freedom that a biker cannot feel in Canada in a Moslem country that has the feared Sharia Law. You have to do something wrong here before the police pay attention. A biker is a non-event to all here.

The Desert Sand Relentlessly Conquers All

The highways are the best I have been on, slightly better than those in South Africa and parts of Europe.

THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 33


Riding Dubai with Donny TAVIS’ AUTO SERVICE -REPAIRS TO ALL MAKES AND MODELS -SAFETY INSPECTIONS -AC SERVICE

by Donny Petersen

Camels are more comfortable than what I have been told. They truly are the ships of the desert. After crossing one sand dune, all disappears from behind...now, I know why it is so easy to get lost...and I cannot go 14 days.

Camel Rule

Avoid the camel’s rear end and always be on the lead camel. They lay big fart bombs and shit whenever. I do not know why I instinctively know this stuff when doing something for the first time. Now it is out to dinner and a night club. I will fall asleep when bored. There is no boredom here. Sorry about your luck... I have made a big mistake. I had an opportunity to go 1200 TWINNEY DR. UNIT 10 to various nightclubs for the last few nights with the boys. NEWMARKET ONTARIO L3Y 9E4 Instead I look for my usual haunt… a lowlife bar. There are The desert sand is relentless as the breezes constantly none. Alcohol is only found in tourist hotels. blow grains on the roads that become patches, that become The Red Falcons take us to dinner in a high end Persian deeper, that become… the desert seeks to reclaim what man (Iranian) restaurant for a feast… and a feast it was. has taken. The roads must be constantly cleaned similar to Then they took us into a top Dubai night club in the a continuous snowfall at home. If left untended for a week Crowne Plaza. We enter. I have made a big mistake not comor two, the perfect highways would disappear as the desert ing the other times… I am hooked. voraciously conquers all. We have the VIP section that sits above the other areas. Animal crossing signs are much like a deer sign at home; Everything is free in a place that costs a fortune. The club ashere we have long horned antelope and camel beware signs. signs their big security guys to protect us but they soon see We ride to the port city of Fujairah, 240 kilometers away they can learn a thing or two about this from us. for lunch… and a great lunch it is. It rains about once a year The section below is for the ultra wealthy...wearing their here. Later we get to hold a Falcon, which is the desert hunt- “cool” $1000 shirts and pink pants. One guy is wearing overer eagle. sized gold plated running shoes. We go back to the Bike Show in Dubai at 130 to 150 kph, The bottle service for them is 18 bottles at a time every the pack moving seamlessly along a different flawless high- half hour… why?… I have no idea because they are capable of way. My Dyna will go 180 kph. drinking only a fraction of what I saw. I think their hanging-on Camel Ride women liked the huge sparklers that accompanied each botWe stop in the desert, climb off our bikes and climb onto tle…. Spending $400 bucks a bottle to give a girl a sparkler! camels. Outside the club, all women wear Hijabs and Burkhas. Camels do not kick back. They are a lot bigger than one Inside, something is very familiar with the tall, very good imagines. However, they do spit and bite. I learned quickly looking women. Where have I seen these long legs and 6” not to approach fast or from behind. Their head will be in spike high heels that look like they were born wearing them your face immediately. So, I approach from the front side, before? slower than normal. As the head comes around, I push it I start thinking I am good looking as they parade over to away firmly; then begin touching and rubbing its head. The our section to gain access. Our protecters scan us to see if camels sit at rest because I would not be able to touch their any or one of us is interested before allowing them access. head while they are standing. These girls are not used to refusal. If the hump is firm they have lots of water and can walk Ahhh… this is where I have seen these beauties before…. the desert for up to 14 days without new water intake. they are Russian…. And they are looking for dough. Sorry about your luck, girls. I lose my good looks for awhile but they also love power. Now, the head of the rich people is a little wobbly and he is coming to us. Our guys stop him. He is obviously not used to this and calls the many club bouncers over. They run to him ready to obey any request but one. He wants them to take care of us for daring refuse him access. We are charitable. The doormen are grateful. Sorry about his luck. I go to the washroom. One of our Luxembourg guys is angry at a group of young Iranian men. We ask what’s up. They have been insulting us in Our guy is Iranian and under7 MAIN STREET EAST SELKIRK ONTARIO N0A 1P0 Iranian. stands. As the words heat up, more

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THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 34

PARTS, ACCESSORIES, AND INSTALLATION


Riding Dubai with Donny Iranians surround us. Sorry for their luck. Hard to talk shit never mind fight with no air as I disable two of them on either side of me with well placed elbows to their midsections. Another one of our guys, a brute of a man with half his face tattooed and gold teeth suspends one by the neck, feet dangling in the air with one arm. The strobe lights bounce off his teeth as they sparkle to the pounding House music. Sorry for the guy’s luck. The security is ever grateful that we stopped as soon as these punks lost their steam. Security really likes us now because they see we quickly rise to the occasion but do not continue after the threat diminishes. I am happy for their luck. It is getting close to 3 am. The Russian girls take renewed interest in us. We have others on our minds. These gorgeous women do not like rejection. Sorry for your luck.

The Ride to Abu Dhabi

Never heard of Abu Dhabi? You should have. This is where the money is. It’s Sheikh (pronounced Shake) financed the majority of Dubai’s real estate. Dubai is a tourist center. It also makes money from ultra rich corporate “respectable, good people” that launder their money through real estate purchases and sales. Abu Dhabi is a separate kingdom or Emirate from the Emirate of Dubai. The UAE (United Arab Emirates) is the country that contains these kingdoms, which evolved from desert nomadic tribes. The Sheikh of each Emirate is head of their respective Royal Family; a monarchy government...dictatorship if you will, but a benevolent one where the people are well taken care of. Abu Dhabi is stricter than Dubai, which is the Arab world’s most liberal and lenient (relative terms). A smaller pack leaves Dubai. We head south on another superb highway broaching 150 kph. Our host Red Falcon started slowing as we approached Abu Dhabi...first to 120 kph, then 100 and finally 80 kph. It is wise to obey the laws to the letter here. On the other hand, the speed limit in Dubai is 120 kph; 140 kph is tolerated and fines are given when hitting 141+ kph. The original Shiekh of Abu Dhabi, the revered and beloved Sheikh Zayed loved his people in return. He said, “I fill my cup with water for the people; when the cup overflows, it is for the world...sounds very Christian to me. We enter the Emirate and head for the appropriately named Sheikh Zayed Mosque. I was super impressed with the main Mosque in Kazan Russia but the Sheikh Zayed Mosque in Abu Dhabi must be the world’s most opulent. It is too big

for one picture Respect must be shown in a mosque with appropriate attire, no shoes, loud talking or laughing. All are welcome at any Mosque. If wearing shorts for example or a sleeveless shirt, a clean white gown is given to you. Egil joins me in thanking the Red Falcons for a wonderful week.

by Donny Petersen

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Tel. (905) 333 3282 Guelph Line Addresses are 480 Fax (905) 639 9190 Ontario interesting as Burlington, Toll Free 1 800 668 0980 Canada L7R 3M1 there are none in Dubai. Mail is delivered to centrally located post office boxes. Locations of residences and businesses are according to local and familiarly known landmarks. Dubai Harley-Davidson has a post office box number (PO Box 24804, Dubai, UAE). Its location is listed as Dubai Harley-Davidson on Skh Zayed Road http://www.harley-davidson. ae. Other contact information is by telephone +971 (0)4 339 1909 extension - 237; ; Email, hdrental@ harley-davidson.ae, or Muhammed Pasha, hdrental@harley-davidson. ae. There are about 3.5 AED in one Canadian dollar. Rental costs are per day @ AED800 for touring models, Softail @AED700, Dyna Glide @ AED600 and Sportsters @ AED500 each for 24 hour periods; bike pickup is at 11am as is return. Kilometer allowance is 250 km per 24 hours, 2500 km per week, and 10,000 km per month. Excess kilometers cost is one AED per km. Bikes are comprehensive insured with 3000AED deductible in case of accident. Hog members will be eligible to get 10% discount on total amount. The dealership is closed Fridays. Friday is their Sunday. Saturday is a day off with Sunday the first day of the work week. donny petersen

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THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 35


Black Hawks Annual Show and Shine 2013 It was a spectacular day as I loaded up Petoonia for the ride across to Bobbie’s Restaurant in Mount Hope to attend the 2013 edition of The Black Hawks Annual Show and Shine. This event has earned its reputation of being solid well run and draw a crowd from all over the Province as well as the local riders for whom it has become a tradition and a must attend function of their riding season. It was a beautiful day for a ride and the destination and the company that I would be keeping for the afternoon made it even better! I had attended once before quite a few years ago as this was always JR’s territory and he was very protective of

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THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 36

certain events such as this and only let me venture in on rare occasions. But he was out of town doing retired guy stuff and with me now being the guy in charge of assignments; I seized the opportunity and treated myself to a plum. As I rolled in and scanned the massive parking lot for a place to and park Petoonia I wasn’t surprised to see a large crown already assembled and a huge array of motorcycles ringing the large restaurant. I got Petoonia settled into a shady spot grabbed my trusty Nikon and set to work. I immediately spotted a bunch of familiar faces and bikes and made my way around trying to take it all in and remembering to take pictures as well as socialize (See there is a lot of pressure in doing this job!) with all the nice folks who were out to enjoy the day. More bikes were rolling in all the time and I knew that the judges had their work cut out for them today trying to pick winners from the field of entrants assembled here. Bad Bob, an extraordinary friend, who has come on board with us recently (See, that is how it works. You hang around for a while and we put you to work! That was what happened to me.) and volunteered to cover another Hamilton event for us earlier in the day swung by to check out this event as well as it has been a favourite of his for years. We walked around together taking pictures of some of the amazing bikes before we wandered inside to partake of some of the fine food that Bobbies has become famous for and a pint or two of 50 that they stock here, and socialize with the many friends and acquaintances that I’ve made over the years, like long time Black Hawk member, Mouse who stopped by our table to shoot the shit for a while. Our bellies full and our thirsts quenched, we then headed back out to take more pictures as still more bikes arrived and crammed into the full to overflowing lot and registered for the Show and


Black Hawks Annual Show and Shine 2013 Shine making the judges jobs even harder. We heard rumblings that the awards would be presented MGK ENGLISH-FRENCH soon and made our way in to get a prime spot to get pictures of TRANSLATION SERVICES the winners. Man! There was a huge array of prizes laid out there on the manon.kellman@sympatico.ca pool tables both for Certificate in Translation from the winners of this The University of Toronto but the door prizes www.mgkenglish-frenchtranslationservices.com as well. These guys really know how to run an event! There would be a lot of happy faces when this was over! Guelph, The large room Ontario was packed with anxious participants as they waited for the Judges decisions on who would be taking home the prizes today. Thanks Black Hawks MC for another fantastic day and thanks Bobbies restaurant for hosting this fantastic event and doing such a fine job of serving so many, so well and making it look easy. See you next year! The 10th Annual Show ‘N Shine, put on by The BLACK HAWKS M.C. Hamilton, on Sunday, Sept. 29/13 was held at BOBBIE’S of Mount Hope in superb riding weather. We had 49 registrants, voted by people’s choice. Thank you everyone for coming out, congratulations to the winners. Here are the results: Big Twin Stock:

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Off-Shore Stock: 1st Prize: MARK P., ‘08 Suzuki 2nd Prize: TED D., ‘01 Victory Off-Shore Custom: 1st Prize: LINDA P., ‘03 Honda Shadow 2nd Prize: JOHN A., ‘04 Kawasaki Sportster: 1st Prize: ROB F., ‘89 Sportster 2nd Prize: JESSIE N., ‘75 Sportster Best Paint: BILL S., ‘97 Sportster

1st Prize: n/a 2nd Prize: DON K., ‘12 Road King Big Twin Custom: 1st Prize: RANDY F., ‘99 Fat Boy 2nd Prize: GARY K., ‘08 Streetglide Trike: ROB V., ‘08 Triumph Rocket 3 Antique: JOHN D.,’72 Shovelhead

The Black Hawks M.C. would like to thank our loyal sponsors for their help and their generous donations: On The Fringe Leather; Bobbie’s Restaurant; Brass Pole; Classic Leathers, Hamilton; Clare’s H-D, Niagara; Hip’s Cycle, Brantford; Charles Jones, Nan ticoke; Rocky’s Harley-Davidson; D&D’s Diner; Wiggie’s Restaurant; Boston Pizza, Brantford & Simcoe; Poole’s Cycle; B&S Cycle, Simcoe; Kitchener Harley-Davidson; Riders Choice, Mt. Hope; Crown Auto Sales- Paul Laurinec; A&A Discount Auto Parts-Robert Wharrie; The Innsville- Bob Hemberger Taylo r Soil & Gravel; Piano Techniques- Ross Johnson; Rite Time; Shelley Hermiston; Neil Pratt; John “Reb” Felker; Jim “Huck” Wilkinson; Sandy & Bud Jenkins; Ted Day; Terry Moe; Albert Skeates; Jim Broome; Bob Hampson.

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Men’ s Night at Kitchener Harley

What’s this another party? I’m in on the fun and frolicking as usual. As in past years the staff at Kitchener Harley Davidson went all out with another great night of fun, prizes and entertainment. No that fat fellow in the red suit didn’t make an appearance, but you could tell that he was there in spirit. The 100 plus friends and customers that attended tonight, also took full advantage of this no tax event. Santa’s helpers were busy wrapping present after present, but I have my suspicions that some of the gifts going out of the door unwrapped, were not going to make it under the tree.. Ho...Ho... Ho... Live music by Smokin Dave, great deals on parts, accessories and Harley apparel made this another great

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 38

by Kaz

social event. It’s hard to imagine not being here to enjoy it. No we weren’t drunk singing Christmas carols. Besides I couldn’t carry a tune with a fork lift From the time you walk into the store, you realize that some things just don’t change. Yet something was definitely different here tonight. As I wandered a r o u n d , seemingly aimlessly, I took an inventory of what was going on. The Christmas decorations were up all over the store and of course there was the obvious Christmas tree. The staff, aside from being dressed in festive attire, were all there. But something was not like it always is. Maybe it was the scent of fresh wings cooked up by O’Briens for the customers to inhale. Maybe it was the beer being served up by the Tillsonburg Kinsmen Club. Could it have been the Vanastra Lion’s Club selling tickets for a draw for a bike. Maybe it was Donald showcasing the Big blue motorcycle lift. Nope don’t think that any of these things had anything to do with it. Then as I turned to walk out of the service area I saw what this was all about. Buried in the corner behind the door was an image that was sure to bring a tear to Santa’s eye. A new Hertitage Softail, buried under a


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mountain of unwrapped toys. All these toys, donated by customers and friends for the Knights of Columbus in Waterloo to distribute to less fortunate children. It isn’t always about what you have that makes you who you are, It’s also what you can give to others that make you who you are. It doesn’t have to be expensive, It doesn’t have to be Harley oriented or money. Sometimes all it takes is a hand shake, a kind word or in this case a little toy to make someone happy. Christmas is a time to celebrate and enjoy what we have. Family, friendships and a common bond that brings us together as family. Whether you are attending charity rides, volunteering or just supporting an event, being a part of it is what makes us who we are. As I sit here thinking back on what an amazing year it has been, I can’t help but wonder what Santa is going to bring me. By the time you read this, the holiday will just be a warm and fuzzy memory of the fun and festivities of the past holidays. For some of us that scored some goodies for our rides

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they were probably installed on Boxing day. For others sporting new chaps or leathers, the opportunity to play with those is yet to come. For the children that received the toy’s,

well lets just say that they will be enjoying them for a long time. Best wishes from all the staff and management at Kitchener Harley Davidson and Thank-you for making tonight a special night for them as well, by just being here. Kaz

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THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 39


Hello fellow inmates...

by Dangerous Donnie from Durham

and few ales. Missed out on a their NYE party as I had a gig in Burlington (oh yah along with all things motorcycles I have been a musician forever and still make a few bucks doing it.), and even tho I am getting a bit too old to do this…I figure “when they stop payin’ I’ll stop playin”

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(613) 392-8433 www.makeitroar.com Well hello from the cheap seats…I snoozed/loozed and missed out on putting in some of my usual blarney for the Mags January issue, truth is there wasn’t much to cover in the Durham back 40 acres.. Critter as usual put together another stellar issue for you fine readers and other assorted reprobates. So you didn’t miss much from this loogan. Anyhow as you read this the Ice Storm of 2013 is a distant memory… in my area we were without power for 5 days…. I had gas fireplace that put out less heat than a birthday cake candle…(with no elecky-no fan to move the heat).The fireplace upstairs well that just looked good but you need wood for that, and I didn’t exactly have cord of firewood out the back . Anyhow we survived, not as good as some but much better than man. You gotta feel for those elderly folks in the older high-rises…no power,…no elevator,…no water,…what a clusterfuck it was! But we managed to get out to 81 East’s UFC Fightnite, and had good time

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THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 40

Saturday I made the usual trek to the Bike Show out at the airport, where one of my club brothers had his softail entered in the show and placed 3rd. in his classs (good on you Hollywood). I basically hung around hall 5 where the Mag had their booth and a close proximity to the beer garden.

Critter and I enjoyed some beverages together for an hour or so, along with several of my friends and the 2000 that he knows. I have no idea if the crowds were bigger than the last few years but judging by the parking lot everybody and their brother were there checking out what’s new and what’s old. I was able to meet some of the other peeps that write for the mag. The very beautiful


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Hello fellow inmates...

by Dangerous Donnie from Durham

Sherry, and the not so beautiful Beau from Ottawa, just kidding really though super people, I hope to run into them again (maybe head up for the Cow Paddy Rally this year up in Ottawa I hear that is good old school type event). I will be going to the Rangers MC

anniversary party Jan 18th, Laszlo and his crew always put on a tremendous bash, attended by all the “A” listers. So anyhow folks I hope 2014 is going to be a good year for all, I mean 14 is double 7, so it should be lucky eh? I’m planning some road trips this year, Sturgis has been on my bucket list for way too long. My 06 geezer glide and I are not getting any younger, and racking up the mileage. I will need to dump some $ into tires and stuff, nothing worse than a road trip with a mechanical break downs, you end up holding up your fellow travelers while it gets looked after. But that’s all part of it…it’s not the destination it’s the journey… So again we’ll cya when we cya… ZFFZ … as of today…67 days till spring….

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1111 DAVIS DRIVE, SUITE 501, UNIT 23 NEWMARKET, ON. L3Y 9E5 THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 42


Motorcyco Beau To all the readers of The Riders Mag, Happy Freaking New Year! May the year of 2014 be the best ever to all of you and may we have the opportunity to meet up during the riding season and please keep in mind to never ride faster than your guardian angel can fly! In keeping with tradition I started the new year out by actually leaving the far eastern regions of Eastern Ontario and headed down with five of my brothers to attend the North American International Motorcycle Show in Toronto and where this event has become the traditional way to start of the beginning of the year. I am never sure which is more enjoyable to me, the show itself or the ride down to attend it because it always amazes me how you start of the trip with a van load of bearded, balding, tattooed men and somehow arrive with a van load of laughing teenagers who have covered just about every bad joke there is to tell. For me, one of the highlights of this show is the opportunity for me to meet up with many of my colleagues from The Riders Mag. We all work so hard in our own individual communities that except for emails or the occasional phone call, we never get much opportunity to just hook up and socialize with each other and talk about what has happened in the year past and what we are expecting to do in the upcoming year so getting to talk with Critter, Al, Donnie, Manon and of course, the lovely Sherri O’Irish, it all made what was a great show just that much more greater for me. This year the Toronto show had a larger contingency of motorcycles and while I usually find myself spending most of my time circling the custom bikes and trying to imagine winning the lottery so

from the Far East.... of Ontario that is!

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I could afford to have all my motorcycles painted like some of the many works of art that were on exhibit throughout and also found myself very interested in the vintage area of the show where they had just about every motorcycle that I had and that covers more decades than I

THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 43


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am willing to own up to. The Toronto International Center is a large venue and there was something there for everyone whether you are interested in Harley or metric, custom or stock and vintage or sports, it all was there for the public to enjoy and along with the bikes were various organizations such as O.R.R.A (Ontario Road Riders Assoc), the Iron Sirens who refer to themselves as a riding club for Chicks, the Motor Maids, who happen to be one of the oldest motorcycle clubs in North America and

from the Far East.... of Ontario that is!

whom we have many friends who belong to it and numerous other organizations that make the effort to help improve the motorcycle community. You know, when I write this column I am aware that people read it and I understand they make their own opinion of how and what I write about but I was absolutely blown away by the number of people who approached me during the show and offered me condolences over my Garth, the wonder Doberman, who passed away this past August. I know I always enjoyed writing about his charity work and the pleasure that riders from all over had just getting to know him, but when so many people came up to me and I realized how many had come to know Garth through the articles, it made me even prouder to be part of The Riders Mag. All of us love the motorcycle lifestyle, and personally I can say that I feel bikers are the best people there are, but it means something extra special when you find that people consider you a “friend” and feel comfortable enough to approach you and talk. Like every year that goes by, I look forward to meeting more & more of you, whether in person or on facebook. Once again and on so many levels, the North American International Motorcycle Super Show was a brilliant success. Once the boys and I got back from our little road trip I found myself back to work

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THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 44


Motorcyco Beau getting ready for the Ottawa International Motorcycle Show which is happening on Feb 1st & 2nd, at the EY Centre, near the Ottawa Airport. This year I will be putting a booth to represent The Riders Mag with the intention of meeting more of the Ottawa and area motorcycle community, charity rides and events & biker friendly businesses and making them aware of our presence and to hopefully encourage them reach out to the public to promote their particular ventures and help support our Mag. The show has been growing steadily over time and this year as an added feature there will be two of the cast members, Chibs & Tig from the popular television show, Sons Of Anarchy and they will be present on both days of the show to sign autographs for the public and will be participating in a sort of meet & greet dinner on the Saturday evening for $125.00 per person & a Sunday morning brunch at $95.00 each and based on the popularity of the show I expect a respectable turnout. Now of course keep in mind that as an added bonus and at no extra cost, you can stop by and meet myself and some of the Eastern Ontario Riders Mag crew...Just saying! Others who we look forward to seeing at the show are our long time brother, Trapper, from the 1st Cav and who was featured in several of the photos I took last summer while participating in the

from the Far East.... of Ontario that is!

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National Memorial Ride, honoring fallen brothers. I was not only proud to Tim & Peri participate but somehow the pics I took that day www.bamachine.ca were some of the ones I 2310A Manotick Stn. Road, was most proud of and I Osgoode, ON K0A 2W0 received a lot of positive NEW LOCATION SOON! feedback from many of those that read my column and from friends and many of my brothers, who are ex-military. There is always the slogan “We Support Our Troops” on the front of every Riders Mag and you can be sure that we take our support for the military very seriously. S.O.A.R. (Society Of Ottawa Area Riders) will also be present at the show and promoting their campaign to promote the month of May as “Biker Awareness Month”. They’ll be urging both motorcyclists & automobile driver to share the road, and to reduce the number of motorcycle riders who get injured or killed

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THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 45


Motorcyco Beau every year. You can also expect to see Hillbilly and the Capital City Bikers Church Crew at the show manning a booth and I just was talking to him the other day about the CCBC’s May Swap Meet that will be taking place on May 3rd this year. While the vendor tables are still for free, the Church is going to charge a $2.00 admission charge to attendees, which considering the amount of swap and other biker related items that can be found, makes this event still a bonus and well worth the expense. Not only is this show considered to be the signal that riding season is here, it has always been a great way to hook up with lots of fellow riders early on in the season. As far as other events that will be taking place this year, one of the new rides but also one that is close to my heart will be the “Awareness Ride for Traumatic Brain Injury & PTSD” and is the brain child of The Celtic Brotherhood. They have set June 21st as their first of several rides for this worthy cause so just keep reading the Mag and the information will be up soon. Well Folks! That is about all for this month but I look forward to having lots to tell you about after the Ottawa show and please remember to send me any information of events, rides etc

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 46

from the Far East.... of Ontario that is!

that are taking place anywhere in the Eastern Ontario Region and I will be more than glad to do whatever I can to help get the word out or take part in or if you are a motorcyclefriendly business and would like to reach out let people know, please contact me by email : theridersmag. beau@gmail.com

As always I leave you with “We Make Our Motorcycle Communities Stronger!.... By Making Them Better!” .. Brotherhood! Motorcyco Beau!



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Well one year gone and another has started, I hope everyone enjoyed the holidays and all the parties and family functions that went on. The end of the year parties were awesome this year. To bad my health and the weather kept me from some enjoyable events, but the ones I did attend were very fun and entertaining, The Iron Horse M.C. has a yearly chili cook off, and pool night, this party on the 28th of December, like in past years was a very good turn-out. I was out doing my month end rent collecting and stuff when I decided to stop in and see Sarge , well he reminded me of this party so he and his new wife Dayna ( congrats on the marriage by the way) and myself headed over to the club, upon arriving the street out front was lined with vehicles and parking was at a premium. So up and down the road I went looking for a not too far of a walk parking spot, I finally found a spot across the street beside the car lot. I parked, loaded my arms with Riders Mag Dec Issues and headed for the door, Upon entering I see many people that I know and many unmet friends as well, I circulated thru the place, shaking hands and wishing everybody prosperity and good health in the upcoming new year, finally I got to the back room where the many different kinds of chili filled the tables that were lining both sides of the room, many folks were taste testing the fares. Dida was taste testing each chili and was narrating the taste and strength of hotness, aww this one got a bite to it he states as he grabes a cold beverage to cool his burning mouth, everyone was having a great social time, there were a few die-hard riders who rode in this day as well. the weather was totally unpredictable and these guys must have froze as the temps were well below freezing. I could not stay to long at this event with family events to do too, but upon leaving I heard that the day was also Dida’s birthday, and he and a few people were going to the casino Windsor for the smorgasboard, an invitation was extended to my wife and myself, well I had to put a few things off to attend, but went home picked up Linda and headed to the Casino. The place was packed, waited in line to go in to restaurant,..once seated everything went great, the meal excellent, the company better. After gambling for a bit , loosing over a hundred bucks in no time at all, we all headed downtown to a place where The Smokin Purple Monkey Band played, this band has played at our band fest a few times and we like to support them . The very next day was the areas Biker breakfast, that

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is held yearly on the Sunday between Christmas and New Years, This event started by Mitch L many years ago has grown very large to what it is today, Mitch has moved away to British Columbia and the set up and scheduling fell into the hands of Butch Roehler who gathered more and more people into the fold until his death a couple seasons ago. ( R.I.P my friend ). Since this Butch’s family has taken the responsibility and a great job they have done.

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Riding The Colasantis tropical gardens, where the event is held, ropes off a section for us bikers, you can eat the smorgasboard or order off the menu, the all you can eat is priced fairly and includes many a good dishes, all the breakfast and lunch fares you need to get the job done..lol. Again there were bikes in the parking lot, sure hope they got washed when returned to their garages as the roads were covered in salt. It was great to see everybody again this year. Q.M.C. Sparta Open House was held this past weekend, many clubs and citizens attended this expansion party, The Queensmen M.C. has been around since 1959 and over the years has grown and shrank like all others. The guys have a great spot close to the St Thomas drags, but are far enough out to not disturb others .. ie neighbours.. When I arrived, having drove up with Filthy, we located a parking spot, as not to get blocked in, grabbed a hand full of mags and headed for the door, the c/h was warm and inviting, a nice place, their pool table that sits in the middle of the room was getting some action. The hospitality was great, as I circled the place and shook

Southwest

by Guardrail

hands with folks from many different clubs, and citizens alike. We made it to the back room, of course the place was full of food, the smell of chili from the crock pots filled the air, there were tables running the length of the room and they were full of cold cuts and cheese platters, rolls, buns, salads, vegetables, pasta, lasagna etc., at the end were boxes of cherry cheese cakes in individual cups and boy were they good, the cheese cake had everyone talking. The food was fantastic, and the hospitality better, everyone I spoke to was having a great time. The bon fire had to be cancelled due to the inclement weather, rain and very windy, the temps were warmer, but parking was a chore, I am betting these guys have some tire track ruts to repair this spring Well the night ended with a 1.5 hour ride back home which we had no issues , we got to my house where Filthy had left his truck and the day was done. I truly enjoyed seeing everyone at these events and look forward to a great 2014 with you all‌.Good health and Prosperity to you all. Till Next Month Guardrail gaurdrail@theridersmag.com

Happy Valentines Day

THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 52


Joke

Page

We don’t have half dozen nuggets,’ said the teenager at the counter.’ You don’t?’ I replied. ‘We only have six, nine, or twelve,’ was the reply. ‘So I can’t order a half dozen nuggets, but I can order six?’ ‘That’s right.’ So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets I was checking out at the local Wal-Mart with just a few items and the lady behind me put her things on the belt close to mine. I picked up one of those ‘dividers’ that they keep by the cash register and placed it between our things so they wouldn’t get mixed. After the girl had scanned all of my items, she picked up the ‘divider’, looking it all over for the bar code so she could scan it. Not finding the bar code, she said to me, ‘Do you know how much this is?’ I said to her ‘I’ve changed my mind; I don’t think I’ll buy that today.’ She said ‘OK,’ and I paid her for the things and left. She had no clue to what had just happened. ( But the lady behind me had a big smirk on her face as I left) A woman at work was seen putting a credit card into her floppy drive and pulling it out very quickly. When I inquired as to what she was doing, she said she was shopping on the Internet and they kept asking for a credit card number, so she was using the ATM ‘thingy.’(Keep shuddering!!) I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. ‘Do you need some help?’ I asked. She replied, ‘I knew I should have replaced the battery to this remote door unlocker. Now I can’t get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery to fit this?’ ‘Hmmm, I don’t know. Do you have an alarm, too?’ I asked. ‘No, just this remote thingy,’ she answered, handing it and the car keys to me. As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, ‘Why don’t you drive over there and check about the batteries. It’s a long walk....’

The mother says, ‘I just gave him some ant killer......’ Dispatcher: ‘Rush him in to emergency right now!’ Perks of reaching 50 or being over 60 and heading towards 70! 01. Kidnappers are not very interested in you. 02. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first. 03. No one expects you to run--anywhere. 04. People call at 9 PM and ask, “Did I wake you?” 05. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac. 06. There is nothing left to learn the hard way. 07. Things you buy now won’t wear out. 08. You can eat supper at 5 PM. 09. You can live without sex but not your glasses. 10. You get into heated arguments about pension plans. 11. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge. 12. You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who walks into the room. 13. You sing along with elevator music. 14. Your eyes won’t get much worse. 15. Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.

Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too swift. One day she was typing and turned to a secretary and said, ‘I’m almost out of typing paper. What do I do?’ ‘Just use paper from the photocopiCLEARANCE SALE! 20-30% OFF STOREWIDE er’, the secretary told her. RIDING GEAR SUPERSTORE GREAT SAVINGS With that, the intern took her last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on JOE ROCKET, SPEED & STRENGTH. TEKNIC, TOUR MASTER the photocopier and proceeded to make Motorcycle Jackets, Pants, Gloves, Helmets, Rain Suits five ‘blank’ copies. NELSON RIGGS, TALISMAN MOTORCYCLE LUGGAGE TANK BIBS, SADDLEBAGS, TOOLBAGS

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THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 53


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1, Hamilton Road, London, Ont. N6B-1M9 16. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service. 17. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can’t remember them either. 18. Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size. 19. You can’t remember who sent you this list. 20. And you notice these are all in Big Print for your convenience A woman in a supermarket is following a grandfather and his badly behaved 3 year-old grandson. It’s obvious to her that he has his hands full with the child screaming for sweets in the sweet aisle, biscuits in the biscuit aisle; and for fruit, cereal and pop in the other aisles. Meanwhile, Granddad is working his way around, saying in a controlled voice, “Easy, William, we won’t be long . . . Easy, boy.” Another outburst, and she hears the Granddad calmly say, “It’s okay, William, just a couple more minutes and we’ll be out of here. Hang in there, boy.” At the till, the little terror is throwing items out of the trolley, and Granddad says again in a controlled voice, “William, William, relax bud, don’t get upset. We’ll be home in five minutes; stay cool, William.”

Page So impressed, “Last month I put new tires on her, the woman goes two weeks ago it was a new battery, outside where last week I needed a new horn, the Grandfather Now I need to rebuild the motor! is loading his groceries and the boy into the car. She says to the elderly gentleman, “It’s none of my business, but you were amazing in there. I don’t know how you do it. The whole time, you kept your composure, and no matter how loud and disruptive the child got, you just calmly kept saying that The ol’ Lady says if I spend things would be okay. William another penny on the bike is very lucky to she’s going to leave me. have you as his I’m going to miss her! Grandpa.” She sure can cook!” “Thanks,” said the old chap, “but I’m William . . . the little bastard’s name is Kevin.”

When I bought my Blackberry, I thought about the 30-year business I ran with 1800 employees, all without a cell phone that plays music, takes videos, pictures and communicates with Facebook and Twitter. I signed up under duress for Twitter and Facebook, so my seven kids, their spouses, 13 grandkids and 2 great grand kids could communicate with me in the modern way. I figured I could handle something as simple as Twitter with only 140 characters of space. That was before one of my grandkids hooked me up for Tweeter, Tweetree, Twhirl, Twitterfon, Tweetie and Twittererific Tweetdeck, Twitpix and something that sends every message to my cell phone and every other program within the texting world. My phone was beeping every three minutes with the details of everything except the bowel movements of Financing Avaliable the entire next Family Owned & Operated generation. I am not ready to live Since 1958 like this. I keep my cell phone in the garage in my golf bag. The kids bought me a GPS 519-825-4222

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