The Rider's Mag Nov/Dec 2013 V15-n08

The Magazine for the Narley Harley Rider

THE RIDER’S MAG READ FREE! RIDE FREE!

Volume 15 #8

Nov. / Dec. 2013 Chapman’s Ride

The Eagles Nest Miles For Smiles

Joke Page

Fri. 13th

What’s Shakin’

We Support

Feature Bike Our Troops!!!

The Rider’s Guide to Ontario and Beyond!!

Over 25,000 Readers and Growing www.theridersmag.com

Table of Contents Pg. 4 – What’s Shakin’

www.hipscycle.ca 900 Colborne St. East 519-756-6218 Brantford, Ontario

What’s going on!

Pg. 5 – Figh ng for you rights.

Store Hours Mon-Fri 9am - 5pm Sat. 9am - 1pm

Scary Larry shakes things up.

Pg. 7– Cruising with Cri er

The adventures con nue.

Pg. 12 – Eagles Nest Miles for Smiles JR keeps his a endance record intact.

Pg. 16 – Ride for Dawn

Jonathan does it up right for Dawn’s struggle.

Pg. 21 – 81 Downtown Boat Cruise 2013

Dangerous Donnie goes boa ng with the 81!

Pg. 22 – Chapman’s Riding for the Cure

Cri er checks out a ride for Diabetes.

Pg. 27 – Joke page.

Since 1988

Time to bust a gut!

Pg. 28 – Wide Ass So ail

Our feature Bike.

Pg. 30 – Bikers Church

Pastor Dave looking a er our Spiritual side!

Pg. 32 – 1% Origin Fraud

WE DO IT ALL!

Donny Petersen clears up some misconcep ons.

M.T.O. INSPECTION STATION

Kaz joins the party.

PARTS AVAILABLE FROM ALL SUPPLIERS

Pg. 35 – Kitchener Harley-Davidson – H-D’s 110 Anniversary .

Pg. 36 – Danni’s Times

Out there with Danni!

Pg. 37 – The Breasts of Dover.

Our very popular feature returns once again. Enjoy!

Pg. 38 – Shenanigans.

Sherri O’Irish checks out the AOA Na onal Party.

ALL LICENSED MECHANICS

Pg. 39 – The Dice Run to Biketoberfest.

Rose takes a ride in the rain.

Pg. 42 – From the Far East…. Ontario that is…

Beau covers some ground in Eastern Ontario!

Pg. 47 – Builder of the Month –

JD Cycles kicks off our new Calendar Feature

Pg. 51 – Hello Fellow Inmates.

Dangerous Donnie does his thing.

164 Main Street, Lucan ON N0M 2J0

Pg. 53 – Riding the Southwest

Guardrail bounces back!

THE RIDER’S MAG 1111 Davis Drive, Suite 501, Unit 23, Newmarket, ON L3Y 9E5 Phone: (905) 235-5353 Toll Free 1-855-873-6680 Fax: (905) 235-5358 Email: rickdavis@theridersmag.com Website: www.theridersmag.com

Publisher / Editor : Rick Davis Publisher Emeritus: Alex J.R. MacRae Editor Emeritus: J.B. Ballantine

Managing Editor: ACE Wolske Creative Content Manager: Peppermint Patty Office Manager: Diane Davis

Advertizing and Sales Eastern Ont./Western Que. Rep: Beau Rooney 613-295-4444 Southern Ontario Rep: J.R. MacRae 905-631-5890 Southwestern Ontario Rep: Tim Armstrong 519-252-9631 Contributing Writers Pastor Dave Neals, Danni, Scary Larry, Manon Kellman, Beau Rooney, Jonathan Musson, Al Marentette, Rossaire, Tim Armstrong, Donny Petersen, Bob Laidlaw, Sherri O’Irish, Dangerous Donnie, Bob Drury Contruibuting Cartoonists Critter, Michael MacDonald Office Security Supplied By: Captain & Morgan “The Wonder Dogs"

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Pre-owned Harley Davidson Sales & Service Financing Available 519-227-1331 JOIN US FOR THE HOG TOWN HOLIDAY OPEN HOUSE

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What’s

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Every Wednesday Checkered Flag Bar and Grill –

Nov. 17th 2013 – Motorcycle Swap Meet 10 AM -5 PM – Peterborough Morrow Building 151 Landsdowne St. W, Peterborough (Behind Memorial Centre) More info 416- 665-3481

December

3671 Hwy #6, Mount Hope. (At By-Pass) ½ price Wings Cri er’s Crew Cards accepted for a further 13% discount.

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Nov. 3rd – Big Al’s 1st Annual Swap Meet Chatham 10AM – 3PM – Kent Belgium Dutch Canadian Club 34 Byng Ave., Chatham On. More info – Bill 306-2027522

Nov. 7th – Kitchener Harley- Davidson - Bagger Na on Night More info –kitchenerharley.com

Nov. 9 -10 - Christmas Motorcycle Show - HAS BEEN CANCELLED Nov. 14th – Rocky’s Harley-Davidson – Bagger Na on Night More info – rockys-harley.com

Shakin’

Dec 3rd. – Rocky’s Harley-Davidson – London – Ladies Night More info – rockys-harley.com

Dec. 5th – Rocky’s Harley Davidson – London – Men’s Night More info – rockys-harley.com

Dec. 7th. – Clare’s Harley Davidson – Open House

9:00 AM – 4:00 Pm 590 York Rd. Niagara on the Lake, more info – 905-6844647, claresharleydavidson.com

Dec 10th. – Kitchener Harley-Davidson – Ladies Night More info – kitchenerharley.com

Dec. 12th – Kitchener Harley-Davidson – Men’s Night More info – kitchenerharey.com

Continued on Page 46

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Fighting for Your

Rights

with Scary Larry

Welcome back friends (& foes)!! Where to start? How shit, stoopin’ and reachin’ until I came upon the deer carcass about the ions-old topic of greed vs. need? Eight years ago, restin’ peacefully on its side in the weeds. It was a big MF’er, the City of Toronto endorsed a parking fee exemption for which must have lost its balance when the hind hooves struck motorcycles & scooters. This initiative was adopted to solve my box, on the right side and on the front latch, causing the the problem of motorcyclists having to pay fines even when nylon hard bag to tear and rip open. The deer must have leapt they were unaware of a violation due to lost or damaged paid- from the deep culvert (as I rolled past) and probably broke its parking receipts. A secondary consideration was to encourage neck on impact. I am always alert to the possibility of deer on more two-wheeled traffic in the downtown core in an effort to my route but I never had a visual – just a flash. Five seconds ease gridlock. Now the city is considering a move to provide slower and I would have been lying there instead of the creadesignated motorcycle parking areas which, initially, motor- ture! My brothers now refer to my Beer Box as the Deer Box. cyclists will be able to park for free but later will be charged a Sick, sick, sick – but waddya ‘spect from a bunch of Zombies, fee somewhere between 25% and 50% of the regular parking Eh Ollie?

Thumbs-up to the Downtown 81 on their new business rate for full size vehicles. According to a city transportation services report – this would fatten the city coffers by up to venture. The media frenzy was (for once) focusing on the $250,000 per year. The matter goes before council on October positive aspects of the story - and it’s about frikkin’ time!

8th but as my deadline looms large; it is doubtful I will be able As they say in show biz, ‘there is no such thing as bad pubto report the outcome in this issue but I will detail it in my licity’ and what a way to launch their new clothing line. It next column. Waddya think Scary? Ollie inquires . . . This is was a positive mainstream media story for about three days, yet another example of government ignoring the needs of mo- which is unfuckinbelievable in the realm of modern methods torcyclists in this province. For over six years, the OCC has of news gathering. In the clip I watched, the reporter caught been prodding the Ontario Liberals to open the HOV lanes the OPP’s talkin’ head off guard and flat-footed. to single rider two-wheeled vehicles but to date; we have reMmmmmm, if the shoe fits . . . Scary Larry OCC Treasurer ceived zero considerations beyond lip-service and the grinning brush-off from our elected crocodiles.

Now, it appears, the City of Toronto is salivating at the chance to stifle (and place in jeopardy) one of the most successful programs that benefits Ontario motorcyclists - in exchange for a paltry amount SUNDAY NOVEMBER 17th 2013 of cash. I doubt there is a colonoscopy bag big 10AM - 5PM enough to give this pork riddled political system a proper and deserving enema, Eh Ollie?

PETERBOROUGH MORROW BUILDING This month’s feature OCC member club is 151 LANSDOWNE ST. W. PETERBOROUGH the Golden Horseshoe Riding Club. This club was formed in 2012 and joined the OCC in 2013.

(BEHIND THE MEMORIAL CENTRE) (smart & concerned - a winning combo in the A LIMITED NUMBER OF BOOTHS leather life!) GHRC members ride out of the Hamilton area but reside in Simcoe, Brantford, KitchSTILL AVAILABLE CALL (705) 340-2130 ener, Hamilton and Oakville. The club conducts rides on Tuesday nights & Saturdays – focusing OTHS on destinations around the Golden Horseshoe PARK AND SELL YOUR BIKE USED PARTS BO area of Lake Ontario. GHRC is open to men and $25.00 $50.00 women and all types of bikes are welcome. The club is free (now there’s a word that never goes out of style) to join. Golden Horseshoe R.C. does not have many rules beyond supporting the club as much as possible and being respectful of other MET members and other motorcycle related clubs. For RIC further info etc., goto www.goldenhorseshoerc.ca BIK ES So how was your ridin’ season? I enjoyed a mostly stress-free summer but there was one incident that happened to me that probably will cause most of you to cringe – particularly if you reside and ride in rural areas. One early morning, I rolled down my county road at a leisurely 90 KMPH clip, soakin’ in the glory of the sun drenched mornin’ and reveling in anticipation of another stellar outing with my Zombie brothers. Suddenly, a flash of brown momentarily zipped past my peripheral vision followed by a thump that caused the bike $10.00 ADMISSION FREE PARKING to swerve and dip dangerously. I resisted the urge to brake choosing instead to steer and balance out FOR FURTHER INFORMATION CALL (416) 665-3481 of the wobble until the bike rolled straight. WTF!!

Brought Fun & Games Premier GLUCKSTEIN My rear bag lid was hangin’ limply and I looked to you by Media Productions Sponsors back to view my belongings strewn down the cenGLUCKSTEIN & ASSOCIATES LLP 1-866-308-7722 terline for about 50 yards. I proceeded to gather my

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THE RIDERS MAG -----PAGE 5

On The

Re rement is awesome! It’s been a year and I am s ll struggling to keep up with my schedule but finding ways to get it under control and enjoying the freedom to do all that other stuff and to spend more me with my rapidly growing up younger gaggle of kids and aging parents, the shows are coming soon and I may turn up at one or more of them depending on how things work out but I was seriously bummed to get an email from Derek at the World of Motorcycles Expo announcing the cancella on of the tradi onal February show.

They cited a number of problems with the primary being the rent at the building as the culprit, I know it was a great loca on but the fight with the hockey people for parking not to men on hotel rooms, especially ones that don’t have en re hockey teams roaming the halls and making way too much noise (wow that’s what it is to be old and re red) but I that the CUSTOM MOTORCYCLES hope dopes over at western GET SOMETHING the fair figure out SPECIAL FOR that having the building empty is YOUR RIDE not as profitable THIS as having it CHRISTMAS! occupied for a weekend in February, and the local government A CUSTOM and a par cular poli cian who SPRINGER was quoted FRONT END as saying “there will be “WHEN YOU WANT a motorcycle show in London IT CUSTOM” over my dead THIS IS THE PLACE body” realizes that all the patrons of the will take 4307 BURNHAM ST. N. show their cash to COBOURG, ONT. another city www.martinscustommotorcycles.com and s mulate economy martinscustommotorcycles@live.com their instead.

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THE RIDERS MAG -----PAGE 6

Road

with J.R.

In case you haven’t no ced I liked the London bike show in all its incarna ons since I first a ended back in the late 90’s when a friend by the name of Larry Pooler owned it. It will be a hole in my schedule for February now and I would say I am gonna go on vaca on now that I have the me but we are takin off in March for somewhere warm so I’ll figure out something else to do with that weekend.

I am happy to say that a er a number of years of false starts and some people who are just too stupid to be named screwing up our a empts to get feature shoots done we booked in the last weekend of September to do our trip and despite the late cancella on of one couple got the shoots done over the course of a weekend on the road, so when we have another slate of 6 or more bikes east of Toronto we will make another trip out that way.

We always make a trip to the southwestern Ontario area every April, it used to be because we had deadlines and the like now it’s just tradi on so we will be heading out via the tri city area, London Ontario as well as the Windsor area that last weekend of April. We are looking for bikes in the Windsor and London areas, we have a shitload of them in the tri city area but there’s always room for more as its pre y local and we usually find me to make 2 or 3 trips a year to the area to do shoots but west of there is a once a year affair so if you been wan n to get your bike in the mag we are par cularly looking for sportsters, shovels, and vintage in the men’s categories and ladies as long as your ridin a Harley you are good to go.

Guys our lists are a li le long for the stock evo/twin cam category but get on the list now and we will get you onto our shoot list but it might take a while for the bike to appear and also the special construc on list, we are caught up with this month’s “Wider Ass So ail” which has been wai n a while now but like the stock bikes get your lady on the bike and we will swing by and get all the pieces ready for future publica on.

Takin off for the weekend it’s good to be re red but you will s ll find me out there .....on the road.

Cruising With Critter Wow! Where has Summer gone? It seemed like just last week I was ge ng Petoonia out for her first run of the 2013 riding season. Thinking back now, I can’t even remember the date or where I was going because it’s been such an incredibly busy year and I’ll have to refer to old issues of The Riders Mag to find out where I’ve been and when I went there.

It all just becomes a blur!

I’m s ll dealing with my aches and pains from my knee but with rum, 50, Tylenol and my bag of frozen peas, I should make it through un l the replacement parts are installed come Feb. 20th.

You will no ce that we’ve introduced a new feature to the Mag. A Builder of the Month feature that will feature a builder and the crea ons that that shop produces that will include a fold out Calendar sec on complete with Calendar Girl on a bike provided by that builder, there will be some other limited adver sing available on the Calendar page as well this is designed when opened, the en re Mag can be hung up and hopefully, grace the walls of shops, basements, barns, offices, homes, bathrooms, outhouses, garages, and whatever other spots would benefit from a calendar and be replaced when the next issue of the Mag is available. There will be a write up on the Shop complete with pictures of the bikes and or the shop. This will be a paid feature as there will be an adver sement for the shop included so if you feel that your shop could benefit from this exposure don’t hesitate to call, as there are only so many months in a year and I’m get ng excellent response to the idea already.

Also available are the individual dates for each moth so for example you were doing a bike night every Tuesday or were doing an event on certain dates and your logo or name of the events will be printed in those spots.

This month we went with my buddy Josh from JD Cycles up in Keswick, as he jumped on the idea when it was s ll in planning stages and was available on short no ce as was the very pre"y blonde girl by the name of Chantale. We arranged for a nice loca on for the shoot and we got it done and I’m excep onally happy with the results. I think that this idea will be well received and will be popular with the builders, adver sers and with our readers.

It has been promised to me that the new Riders Mag Online website will be ready to go as of November 1st. I will be combining my Cri"er Country Sites with this new one and there should be plenty to see and do once we get it going!

I’ve got hundreds of new pictures to post and will be pu ng on all of the old ones as well in archives and other places I’m told that I’m going to be happy. I’m hoping so.

It is with regret that I announce that the Christmas Motorcycle Show and Swap Meet adver sed in previous issues of the Mag and slated to take place Nov. 9 – 10 at the Toronto Congress Centre has been cancelled due to conflic ng personal commitments by the organizer Randy. He regrets any disappointments and inconvenience this may cause.

Randy has asked that I convey this message on his behalf.

RIP LARRY McILROY It is also with regret that I announce the death of HAMC Toronto East Member Larry McIlroy who lost his ba"le with Cancer on October 5, 2013.

Larry was a long me member of the HAMC and was greatly loved and respected member of not only the club but the Motorcycle Community as a whole.

It was a beau ful day and Bob (Who has become welcome company for me on my adventures lately.) and I rode down to The Pine Hills Cemetery on Birchmount Ave. and were not at all surprised to see the enormous turnout. Hun-

dreds and hundreds of motorcycles lined the driveways in every direc on.

Bob and I separated and I wandered through and had no trouble finding people I knew. There was representa ves from most every Club in the Province and beyond out to pay their respects and take Larry for his last ride.

I did get to talk to Larry’s beau ful daughter Dawn and she asked that I state how much she loved her Dad and that she will miss him terribly.

That is a sen ment shared by many of the people gathered there on that day as by all accounts Larry was just one of those really great guys!

I didn’t try to get in for the service as space is limited and should be for family and those closest to him.

I milled around outside talking to as many of those who came out as possible un l the coffin was brought out and placed in the hearse for Larry’s final ride on this earth.

The call went out and we all went to our bikes and fired them up lined up behind the hearse and escort vehicles and then the formidable task of ge ng that many bikes out of that driveway and down the road began.

It wasn’t a quick process, as like I said, there were a lot of bikes, cars, trucks and moving parts to contend with.

Blocking was handled admirably by Members of the HAMC and Aces and Eights MC and the pack ran smoothly through the Streets of Scarborough un l we hit the 401 then the effects of Friday a ernoon traffic on the first day of a long weekend took its toll and the huge pack ground to a halt un l we were able to get off at Brock Street where we accompanied Larry past the Ontario Hydro Plant where Larry worked and then the plan was to ride past his house then back to the Cemetery for the burial. Bob and I s ll had things to do that a ernoon so we broke away from the pack at Pickering and headed off leaving them to complete the task at hand.

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Cruising With Critter My sincere condolences to all of Larry’s Club brothers, his family and friends and to Molly and Tiara (The Dawgs) all will miss him deeply. RIP Larry. GBNF! Port Dover Sept. 13, 2013 This was the next of many major hurdles that I have faced since I took over The Mag last November and it was the one that I dreaded the most. It was causing me many sleepless nights, even with sleep aids. It ranked as high on the stress scale as ge"ng the first issue done and ge"ng through the bike show season with me running things, perhaps even higher.

I am s$ll not that comfortable in my new role, as I never was, I’m not now and probably never will be the businessman that JR is and I was far more comfortable in my role as just plain Cri%er and would have been very comfortable remaining as such, but I love The Mag and do what has to be done to keep it going and I will do the best I can but if I’m going to do it I will do it my way and take the flack if it fucks up.

In the past JR and company would come to town on Thursday and have everything set up and in place that night and in the morning I’d get to town early on Friday morning and a'er mee$ng with Sr. and having breakfast we set up to hand out Mags un$l JR and JB and whatever other crew that they had been able to muster up would arrive some$me a'er mid-day and we would then be able to hand out t-shirts and do all the ladies boob shots. Then it would be dinner $me at The Erie Beach do some more t-shirt give-away and more boob shots, before we all retreated back to the Co%age in Selkirk for drink and conversa$on un$l bed$me followed the next morning by a great breakfast and more conversa$on.

This year there was some confusion over space that would

THE RIDERS MAG -----PAGE 8

be available at the co%age and I, not wan$ng to intrude on family gatherings, made other arrangements for accommoda$ons with my buddy Greg who suggested camping at the schoolyard campground run by the Kinsmen. He had a toy hauler that would be up to the task so he made the arrangements and I would have a place to sleep and company as well as Greg and his Son would stay there as well.

It turned out that the expected crowded condi$ons at the co%age didn’t materialize and I would have had my usual spot but I’d already agreed to the campground experience.

I would have liked to have ridden Petoonia to Port Dover but my new du$es as Boss superseded my desires and I got up early (Which was fine because I couldn’t sleep anyways and all my tossing and turning was just disturbing the Wonderdogs and Godzilla.) got all my shit together and headed to town on Thursday in my brand new F150 that I’d picked up from my local Ford dealer, Shanahan’s in Newmarket the day before, loaded with Magazines and our special Port Dover T- shirts.

I had to make a stop at Purolator on the way to pick up the boxes of T-shirts that Motopsyco Beau had printed and sent to me for the occasion.

Much to former Boss JR’s disappointment I was unable to get the ladies “I flashed my $ts at Port Dover” shirts done. I did however, have assorted ladies sizes of our regular design Port Dover shirts printed which s$ll proved to be quite popular.

Cruising With Critter I rolled into Dover around noon and hooked up with Greg and got se led into the camper and had me for a 50 and some cha er before I had to head into Town and stock all our usual spots, like Angelo’s, On the Fringe, Captain Billy’s, The Norfolk and Clare’s Port Dover with Mags then back to the Campground for a bit before heading back in to stash the truck where we would be able to access the Mags and t-shirts in the morning. I headed to Captain Billy’s to meet up with JR, JB and Sr. for dinner and then they would drop me back at the campsite for the night.

I was exhausted and I should have slept like a log but with my an cipa on of the next day’s events and the fact that here were many at the campground who thought that doing burn-outs and revving the Hell out of their bikes un l the wee hours would be a great idea.

4:00 AM came and I abandoned all hope of a night’s sleep, dressed, grabbed my camera and my trusty cane and headed to Town.

It was a beau ful morning and by the me I reached Town things were star ng to come to life I stopped at Tim Horton’s for a coffee then wandered off up Town. I found Hank from Boot Hill Hearse se ng up his display at his usual spot, shot the shit with him awhile and then up to Angelo’s to get another coffee and a fantas c peameal bacon sandwich that BRO, Erie Shores is famous for turning out and watched the crew from Q107 Derringer in the Morning Show set up for another of their live broadcasts that they do from Port Dover on Friday 13th.

Then up to see the Tantalizing Trish from Brass Pole as they set up at their usual spot and prepared for a busy day. The sun stated to rise and the sound of bikes became more and more prevalent. The ac vity levels all over town increased as well as vendors readied their booths and displays.

Town workers and Police readied for a busy day as well.

I stopped back at Angelo’s to take in a bit of Derringer’s Morning Show and even got a chance to talk to JD and Ryan for a while before heading down to see if Sr. had arrived yet.

Back at the truck I ran found Burlington Bob wai ng and together we wandered the Streets awai ng Sr.’s arrival and when he rolled in we made our way down the street towards the dairy for breakfast with me elec ng (S ll full from that sandwich from BRO.) to con nue on and went off to get pictures and scope things out before everything got too busy running into John and Company from Motorcycle Enhancements. They had a bunch of John’s builds there and even Panda the dog had made the trip.

I ran into our gal Danni as I made my way through town along with her man Kevin and got to yak awhile.

While checking out Clare’s Port Dover’s fine looking set up I got to say hi to Richard and Gail. Their store always looks so great and the me and effort they put in is evident from as soon as you approach the building. They had a lot of exci ng stuff going on, as they always do.

The Fabulous Fenwick Lions had their display set up and were doing a great business selling ckets for the Bike Raffle that they have each year and give away a new Harley at the upcoming Biketoberfest.

I was on my way back up the street to where we set up at The Royal Bank when I got a call from Butch of The Black Diamond Riders MC and they had a crew up at The Bank wai ng to help.

These guys and gals have been a huge help in the past but this year they were even be er.

“Where’s your truck?”

Butch asked. “You just point and tell us what you need and we’ll get it done.” At that he his Son Jody and a whole bunch more headed to where Black Bitch 2 was and within

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Cruising With Critter moments had me completely set up and ready to go. They then took off to check things out but a real nice couple Wendy and Frank remained with us to help for the en re day.

Bob and Sr. made it back from breakfast and we got Sr. set up and comfortable on his great stool that Tim from Triple K had made for him a couple of years back that has been a fixture ever since and served Sr. well.

The crowd was sta ng to swell and the streets were quickly filling up with bikes. The Mags were moving really well and we handed out t shirts at a great pace.

Jonathan also came by to lend a hand and soon Doug and his lovely lady “Tuesday” rode in to town and pitched in as well and the ever lovely Sherri O’Irish joined our merry band.

Carlos from Mackesy, Smye’s office (Their ad has graced the back cover of The Mag for years and are also a long me sponsor of our very popular t shirts.) also joined us and even contributed some items do give away as well.

Dark, threatening, clouds would loom overhead every now and then and we got a very light drizzle that lasted a minute or so before clearing and we heard many reports of rain all around us but here in Dover it was good.

Our crew made short work of our supply of Mags which were all gone by 11:15. So we were now just le with t shirts to do, so Wonderful Wendy and Fantas c Frank took off to check out Port Dover as did Doug and Tuesday in fact most of the crew dri ed away and were swallowed up by the huge crowd that flowed con nuously up and down both sides of the street, with the excep on of Bob, Sr., Carlos and myself but JR and JB rolled in and their arrival marked the point where the t-shirt campaign was put in high gear because JB is a li!le spark plug and really takes charge and puts shit in mo on an just in me as Sr. and I were (As usual at this point in the day at Dover) fast running out of steam.

So it was off to Angelo’s with Bad Bob really proving to be even more of an asset! JR took his place out in the middle of the street on his bike well-armed with a supply of t-shirts and his camera

THE RIDERS MAG -----PAGE 10

Janie found me a spot at the end of a table got us a beer and we set about ge#ng our boob shots. It was at this point that David Smye himself graced our happy li!le crew with his presence and both he and Carlos seemed to be having a ball helping to give out the t-shirts with his Company logo proudly emblazoned on the back and talking with people. David loves bikes, bikers and the lifestyle and fit in here like ringing a bell!

David is a rider and owns and rides at least four and I had the privilege of upda ng his pictures for his ad recently and they are fine looking motorcycles to boot.

We got a lot of help from “The Coronel” who has a knack for recrui ng candidates for our boob pages and enthusias cally kept us well supplied with a vast assortment of girls throughout the a ernoon and would bring them to us at an alarming rate.

My usually trusty Nikon had been sporadically giving me grief lately and I was going to take it into Nikon and have it checked out but it’s like having an ache right up un l you got to the Doctor’s or Den st’s office and it would go away. It had been working fine up to this point in the day and right in the middle of our boobie pictures session at Angelo’s it decided to have one of its moments and wouldn’t focus properly for a me then just as quickly as the problem emerged and with me really doing nothing (That I know of) to have either caused it or fix it was working again, but not before causing the loss of quite a few good pictures.

The camera has since been repaired and replaced as I bought an even be!er one but I am keeping the old D 90 as a backup or spare.

We did our thing up there un l David and Carlos had to take off as he had work yet to do that day and it was ge#ng close to dinner me as well so with that we gathered up our merry band and headed down to The Erie Beach Restaurant for one of their fantas c dinners.

So normally, a er dinner, we would head back up to Angelo’s and do more t shirts, but a er a great meal and a couple of 50’s I could feel that the lack of sleep and the ac vity of the last several days was catching up to me and taking its toll. My knee was absolutely killing me and I just wanted to get back to the camper and se!le in with a Tylenol 3 or 2, wash them down with some rum or 50 or both and just crash so I called it a day said my goodbyes and headed off!

It was s ll pre!y busy but things were dying down quite a bit and many of the hotdog vendors had sold out and packed up as did many of the other vendors and a lot of bikes and people had cleared out as well. One of our other contributors the ever beau ful Manon and her man Gerry were in town and we got to talk a bit before heading off on our way back up the hill towards where the Black Bitch 2 awaited.

Trying to find my way back out of town with many of the streets s ll closed or turned into temporary one way streets that just led me back to where I began and a er two at-

Cruising With Critter tempts I pulled into the Fire Department’s lot and got direc ons back to the campsite.

The campgrounds was busy as Hell with lots of stuff going on I no ced that BDR Doug and Tuesday had set up camp beside our camper at some point during the day but had gone back to tow on the shu le. I headed straight for the camper and extracted the bo le of Captain Morgan that Godzilla had given me for my Birthday which had occurred the day before some Pepsi and my Tylenol 3’s and se led in for a quiet drink and then I hoped to just fall immediately to sleep.

That was not going to happen as I lay there red as Hell listening to people reving the living shit out of their motorcycles and doing burnouts whatever in some sort of ritual that had someone doing it from over here then as if answering a ma ng call by doing it over there and so it went and as the night wore on there were shouts of “Shut the Fuck up!

Or Knock it off you fucking idiots!” interspersed between the roars from the dueling Harleys.

I gave up grabbed a drink and my cane and wandered the campgrounds un l I couldn’t wander anymore. I did check out one of the many bands that had everybody entertained on the other side of the campgrounds I even ran into our former Webmaster Carl the Wizard at his palace on wheels and visited there with him and extremely great entourage for a while. I bought one of the excellent hamburgers that the Boy Scouts were serving before heading back to the camper to try sleeping once again.

I met the neighbours who had a fantas c camper rig that was more of a house on wheels being hauled by a Beau ful Peterbuilt some of whom were down from Sudbury and shared some of their Tequila at their insistence!

It was much quieter now so at some point I did dri off to

sleep and awoke to a very chilly morning around 7:00.

I got my cane and wandered over to many rows of outhouses and then to the Boy Scouts booth where they were serving breakfast and coffee for a cup of coffee before making my way back to the camper to find Greg and his Son up and about with coffee on so se led in for a visit which up un l now we had had li le opportunity to do.

We talked for quite a while un l we heard Doug and Tuesday s rring from their tent next door. I would be hauling their camping gear back with me in The Black Bitch 2 so we loaded it up said my thank you’s to Greg and his Son along with my goodbyes and I headed towards home.

It was a very busy and even ul couple of days but I survived and all is well. The Campground is a bargain and a great spot with lots to do. They have a shu le system that takes you into Town and brings you back and runs constantly and people were having a ball and it was party central for many of the campers with and amazing line up of bands and lots of facili es to make the stay as comfortable as they possibly could as the Kinsmen put a lot of planning and effort into it and don’t just say OK find a spot to sleep if you can.

It was a good me in Port Dover but I was happy to be heading home to my own bed and to sit quietly with Godzilla and The Wonderdogs!

Thanks again Greg and thanks to all who were such a great help. Thanks David Smye and Carlos and to our fine Crew, JR and JB, Sr., Burlington Bad Bob, Sherri O’Irish, Jonathan, Doug and Tuesday, Frank, Wendy, Butch and Jody and all of the rest of the BDR’s who helped out, and thanks to all of you readers and supporters for all your nice comments and encouragement. You make it all worth it!

See you in December!

THE RIDERS MAG -----PAGE 11

Eagles Nest Miles for Smiles 2013 By J.R. STEEL CITY motor company

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COME SEE US AT OUR NEW LOCATION When I re red from the mag last year I made it clear that there were some par cular events that I enjoyed riding in and that I would like to con nue riding and covering if my schedule allowed and weather permi ed.

The Eagles Nest, Miles for Smiles rides was on my list and if Jim and Lorrie are correct and I imagine they are I haven’t missed a ride in 15 years, through all kinds of weather.

The underlying charity of the ride has not changed at all nor have their principles although the faces have changed over the year.

Dreams to Memories is a Fort Erie based charity run by 100% volunteers who send terminally ill parents with their primary school age children on a dream trip, o en to Disney and they usually have the family at the event who will receive the proceeds of their generosity. I have said it for every event I have a ended, what an awesome cause and zero overhead running with 100% volunteers, Open 8 a.m. For Breakfast awesome.

I had really missed “STOP IN ANYTIME having my frequent BIKER FRIENDLY” riding partner Smiley from B.R.O. Niagara with my last year as it has become tradi on that we stop for breakfast 2965 Homestead Drive then do the ride. Our Mount Hope ON L0R 1W0 paths had crossed at (Located Along HWY #6) the B.R.O. Summerbash in July and we agreed to do it again this year,

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THE RIDERS MAG -----PAGE 12

what was u n ex p e c te d was old friend and rider Bob to show up and ride with us.

Bob had le riding for a number of years then decided he wanted to re-enter, I knew this as he looked at buying my old ultra before se ling on something a li le older with a carb, having said that when you see it you would think its brand new as he has had everything rebuilt on it and keeps it immaculate. Bob is a fussy guy when it comes to cleanliness and I think I am fortunate that he even rides with me as I know the filth of my bike embarrasses him and he has threatened more than once to come to my house and clean my bike because he feels bad for it.

A er our trio had breakfast at Dads we headed out for the first stop in Niagara on the Lake completely ignoring the direc ons as usual, I only knew it because I ran into Jim and he told me we weren’t supposed to take the parkway, my excuse was I only looked at the des na on not the direc ons besides everyone knows I love riding the parkway.

Next stop was in Chippawa, my parents home town, I know the place well as my grandparents lived just off the square when I was a youngster but sadly most of them were gone before the end of the 70’s although I s ll have a stubborn Aunt who lives in town and every once in a while we can con her into leaving and coming to the house for a visit or over the river shopping (that’s what the locals call going to the U.S.A.) This ride has varied in length over the years and there was a me when it ended in Fort Erie and there was also a me when the turnaround point was Fort Erie, loving to ride you know why I loved this ride and riding at your own speed, in other words not having to ride in a large group, just relaxing and enjoying the ride is what is great about this event.

Out next stop was in New Germany, ha got ya they changed it to Snyder during the war for obvious reasons (like I said lots of family history and local knowledge that old re red guys think about) when we got our cards and another beverage it was me to head to the last stop, the Junc on on Queen in Niagara Falls right down the street from where we started at the eagles nest that morning. I went to Smiley a local Niagara Falls guy and said you wanna get us over to the Junc on?

He took us right down Sodom rd past Be y’s restaurant and stopped at the Welland river looking at me with the old which way you wanna go from here, well of course I chose the parkway but as we le I said to him, geeze I coulda got us here, I put you in the lead hoping you would take us another

THE RIDERS MAG -----PAGE 13

Eagles Nest Miles for Smiles 2013 By J.R. way so I didn’t have to hear all you wanna do is ride the parkway.

Anyway I cranked the satellite radio up and headed down the parkway, there’s just something cool about the tunes blaring, loud pipes, and scaring the hell out of tourists who think that the road is their personal sidewalk, oh yeah and I have an air horn on my bike that never fails to blow when I ride between Murray Hill and Cli on hill.

The good folks at Dreams to Memories always put on a good feed of burgers and dogs grilled right on the street in front of the bar, and a selec on of salads and veterans like myself know if you want seconds, thirds, fourths whatever stay close to the ladies doling out the food, tell em your starving and once they figure they got all the riders and the volunteers, it’s a free for all.

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Lorrie always has tons of swag to give away at this event usually two pool tables covered in door prizes and then of course there’s always a draw or two for some cool stuff, all proceeds going to the charity.

This year was a bunch of costume jewellery, and cool Be"y Boop stuff always popular with my girls so I bought enough ckets on that stuff that I won one of the three offered but missed out on the pile of scratch and win ckets, but they did raise a lot of dough for the cause.

Jim gets to work on the door prizes which despite turnouts of 125+ bikes o en outnumber the riders and it takes a while to get through all the registered names. Usually he squeezes this in between sets of the band whose name I have forgo"en but I know that they were a bunch of professionals and not musicians these guys were lawyers and dental surgeons if I recall correctly and if you’re not sorry guys it was a while ago but they defiantly rocked and Jim did eventually work his way through all the door prizes.

Somewhere in the midst of it all was the poker run prizes which were outstanding as usual and a er a moment of panic with the sheets Lorrie had handed over to me I went out and checked my tour pack and found them wai ng pa ently for me where I had le them since August. The big winner was a minor riding on the back of dads bike Alicia had four of a kind to take the top award, second place was a gal by the name of Bev with a full house 10’s over 5’s and Jay came in 3rd also with a lesser full house 6’s over 8’s.

I can’t remember ever having a winning hand on this ride but then like so many biker things it’s the ride itself that is the fun and I look forward to riding in this one again next year and hooking up with my crew and star ng out with a nice breakfast at Dads. The ride is always in August and usually the 2nd or 3rd weekend, you know they told me and now I have forgot but check it out, it’s always adver sed in the mag.

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 15

Cathy’s - Ride For Dawn Registra on was between 10:30am – 12:30, with the ride leaving at 1 in the a ernoon.

I le Selkirk maybe a bit late, arriving to a full parking lot at Cathy’s Country Kitchen at the intersec on of Hwy 5 and Hwy 52 (at Peter’s Corners) just minutes before 1pm.

Cathy wasted no me quickly gree ng me, giving me the meal bracelet, the waiver form to complete, and sign, and the (gulp) listed road route. I personally don’t do well with road routes, so I just tuck it away and follow along with the pack to wherever the leaders take us.

Leaving Cathy’s Country Kitchen, we took to highway 5, around probably one of the most intrinsically Bri sh crea ons, a “roundabout” - I really only know of this one, the one on Spadina in Toronto, the one in the backwoods of Niagara Falls somewhere, and there’s one that’s deep in the grounds of York University. There’s probably more, but they’re a perversity in the land where horribly unsynchronized traffic lights en rely freeze traffic flow, rather than control it.

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 16

by Jon

So OFF we headed, taking a saw tooth ride through some pre y country roads, le ing and righ ng and le ing and righ ng between sweet corn fields, and ca le corn fields, and all-purpose corn fields just for feeding and taking in some pre y fantas c scenery that you don’t get on the main roads, with far less traffic.

Up, and down hills, under trees, round bends, and coming dangerously close to Cambridge, but turning away at the last second before I could actually get my bearings (but I was just a follower) and a er about an hour in the gradually increasing heat, we arrived in a sleepy corner of Ayr, at the Queen’s Tavern & Restaurant (a 2½ story yellow brick and black wooden beamed building erected in 1856). Most descended on the bar, thirsty for anything wet in the now blistering sun. A er 45 minutes rest, and recupera on, trying to remain cool, and we’re off again, almost arriving in Paris, almost seeing Bran"ord, even coming tantalizingly close to Scotland, but crossing several main roads, and traffic lit minihighways instead. The blockers were doing an excellent job

Cathy’s - Ride For Dawn keeping our pack ghtly together.

For the s ll unini ated, those new to group riding, “blocking” is the term used for biker(s) who cause crossing traffic to stop while the group rides through an intersec on.

Think about it this way – you have 59 bikes, the lead is 500 yards from the tail and just went over a light that went from green to red in only two bikes. If you have blockers, the remaining 35 bikes slow a bit, do a quick le right glance, and blow through an intersec on with the knowledge that they will not suddenly come to a grisly end under the wheels of a tractor trailer. If you don’t have blockers, the remaining 35 bikes might have to throw the anchor out to stop in me, could find themselves doing cross country to avoid impending doom and mul ple collisions as the lead vanishes from sight, and turns away. On more than a few rides, I have

by Jon

found myself in the back end of such a Frank’s Magic Crops, Inc. tail caught at a red Owner Frank Pastor Jr. light, with many other Horticulturalist Class III U of T lost, and abandoned Over 35 Yrs. Experience bikers, with no real idea of where we are Hydroponic Growing & Lighting Systems going and then have for Vegetables & Flowers to do a hard study of the road route to get to the des na on.

Store Hours All in all Blockers Mon. - Fri.: 11:00 - 6:00 Saturday : 11:00 - 2:00 are an important Closed Sunday element in these rides.

We skirted the 6 na ons reserve, following the Grand E-mail : fmci@cogeco.net River, going through Onondaga and arriving 480 Guelph Line Tel. (905) 333 3282 at the “Riverbend Burlington, Ontario Fax (905) 639 9190 Restaurant” (which Canada L7R 3M1 Toll Free 1 800 668 0980 holds Tuesday bike nights). We had about 45 minutes R&R there, laying under a tree, watching one of our blockers trying to deal with a sheered off air breather bolt.

Rather than just laying under a tree, watching clouds

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 17

Cathy’s - Ride For Dawn

by Jon

Cathy’s Country Kitchen Great Coffee Daily Lunch Specials Home Cooking

Dine In or Take Out

OPEN DAILY 8am - 3pm Peter’s Corners

Phone: 905-628-7820

1305 HWY #5 West

R.R. #1, Dundas On L9H 5E1 gently crawl overhead, it’s far more fascina ng to watch someone doing something that draws blood, and induces swear words.

I o en felt that TV’s Holmes on Homes people lack credibility by finishing a project in under 20 minutes without the cuts and strong language that a room gu ng, and rebuilding by any normal home builder should have caused.

In over 40 minutes, that bolt remained broken, but a er several beers, some bleeding, and seriously strong language and it was agreed that it would survive the rest of the trip so we were good to go.

We barely scraped past Ancaster without anyone knowing where we were, but blew through the thriving micropolises of Copetown, West Flamborough, and the ever popular Chris es Corner, before returning to Cathy’s Country Kitchen for supper, and tunes.

Sky and Kaila took the ckets at the door, or checked the bracelets. Cooking all the great food was up to Brenda, and Kim, Angie, Kerry, and… I know I missed a few names and am sorry for any omissions. We had a choice of pulled pork, or beef on a bun, fixin’s, fries, and a pop. You could always order more, but that was a filling meal in itself, that I couldn’t finish.

Out front, foot stomping biker tunes played by the “Ugly Dog Band” & Billy J White, both of whom donated their me and talent to the cause entertained the crowd.

Candice, and Gail, and of course Cathy were about, making sure everyone was deliriously happy with everything (not a hard job when you do a first rate job of planning and execu ng in the first place).

So what is this “mul ple myeloma” thingy anyway? Let’s Wikipedia it shall we? In a nutshell, it says it’s a cancer of one’s white blood cells, normally responsible for producing an bodies. In mul ple myeloma, collec ons of abnormal

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white blood cells accumulate in the bone marrow, where they interfere in such a way that terrible pain is experienced in the spine and ribs, worsening with ac vity, and can cause paraplegia in late diagnosed cases as well as mul ple organ crashes and burns. While it’s thought to be incurable, it is treatable, with a median survival of 3–4 years, which may be extended to 5–7 years or longer with advanced treatments, and can go in to remission or come back for no reason.

Let’s face it; cancer of any kind is a horrible thing to be diagnosed with.

But having friends and rela ves willing to try and help makes it a bit easier to deal with and you know that you are not alone. Thanks to those who par cipated, $4500 was raised towards helping Cathy’s sister in law (Dawn) to get treatment. A very long list of sponsors helped raise this total, including (but not limited to) Dynotunes, Xquisite Ink, Al Choppers, Oakville, Waterdown Boston Pizza, Stumpy’s Customs Cycle, Hip’s Cycle, Philthy McNasty’s, Fort Erie motorcycle swap meet, and of course Doug & Cathy Thomas. I know Dawn and Cathy will be absolutely delighted to see familiar faces again, and again to this event – it’s a ride that you’d feel good to go to next year.

Jonathan Musson (pe ligh nc.com)

Petflight Incorporated 391 Sentinel Road, Suite 118 Downsview, Ontario. M3J 1V4 Phone: 416 630 0872 Fax: 416 630 5733

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Friday night I get “The Call” it’s Cri er he’s banged the knee again and his cloning machine is broke.

Am I going to Rock’s London Swap Meet? and could I bring my li le camera and a pad’n’pen?

Ha Ha Ha, I’d be there anyway,….. No.1 Bolo Ties & Buckles Western Hats Lookin’ over all that H-D Stuff to keep my ride Starting From running and looking good, and No. 2 a er check00 $ 99 ing a few good saddle guys over the past season $ I ended up at the door of Mike’s Upholstery in with purchase of boots Hamilton. Mike’s was a short ride away and has a great reputa on. A er he listened to my rap about Comfort and Old School Looks (Tuck& Roll) and a three day turn around , it was back, Comphie & Lookin’ Good, Thanks Mike. So my bu needed to get reacquainted with my New/ Old Saddle anyway.

I rolled out Saturday morning down the 403 west from Burlington into Light rain, Fog, then just mist and Dark Clouds…403/401 into London. Rollin’ in through a corridor of Pickups, Vans & Cars lining the sides of the road in front of Rocky’s . Dropped the kickstand grabbed the parts list I’d scribbled down the night before.

Vendor tables were sheltered under the eaves, while trailers and canopies were set up in the parking lot, all of them overflowing with parts for that next build or that finishing touch of chrome for your ride. A er my first lap around the vendors it was me to head inside.

If you haven’t been to Rocky’s yet put it on your list to check out this large, bright, and clean dealership packed with everything Harley, plus a great Lounge and (My Fix) Great Coffee.

Back out to the tables to scrounge.

Got me a couple of Great pieces and a chance to rap with some familiar faces out of Hamilton and Niagara.

That’s it, It’s ge!ng’ darker, Time to Ride.

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THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 20

Downtown 81’s Boat Cruise 2013 It was a steamy hot summer nite as we caged our way down to Parliament and Queens Quay …”for a two hour cruise” …now wait a second…that was “Gilligan’s Island” ..wasn’t it..

Actually this was the annual Downtown HA Pirates Ball on the Riverboat Gambler, which is always well a ended by the who’s who of the MC community. On shore we were greeted by Downtowns ever the statesman and diplomat L.P. who always takes the me to shake hands andask how’r you doing….anyhow as all the a endees prepared board, and “walk the plank” (lucky for us, “not off the boat” …”but on the boat”).. It wasn’t long before the crowd of land lubbers filled the max capacity of this two level vessel, and a er quaffing a beer or three it was heave ho and off we

chugged into the Toronto Harbour .

Then the band (a clubber favorite) Fogger and his crew; Zedhead kicked in and they always can be counted on to provide the right music for the old school and newly converted motorsickle hooligan types.

Another thing is and I am not sure exactly why but somehow these par es are always a ended by some awesome members of the female species.(not sure what these guys have going for them...but holy short skirts batman!.. surely a sight to see on this summers eve.).

The host club always makes everyone feel welcome, and if you

haven’t made this cruise, buy a cket next year…it’s really a great event.

Just about every MC/RC from the city and beyond was represented. It was good to see some of the old friends and new, but don’t get me wrong this is cruise is for everyone not just club folks..

The weather was calm and warm and as the sun went down the city

by Dangerous Donnie

lit up, a pre y cool skyline. Being a born and bred Toronto kid we take it for granted, but from the water It’s awesome to look at, considering in 60’s the biggest building was the Royal York Hotel which is a midget now-a-days among the skyscrapers and condos.

A er we all got planted in our seats on deck, we continued to wet our whistles, the band played on and some took part in the food being served on the lower level of the Gambler, they had a chef serving all kinds really top drawer eats I chose to stay with the Barley sammiches with the knowledge we had a Striker with us as our faithful DD that night….urp!

When the band took a break the Gambler cranked on their sound system, so there was music all nite….We cruised the inner harbour…and out into the lake with the back drop of the city all lit up…a very cool sight.

Anyhow finally a er many fun hours we returned to the dock and we’re invited back to the CH…we followed several of those that rode their scooters east on the Lakeshore.. but we were kind of red and headed home instead…a good day!

Cri er sent his regrets that he could not make this event, so I was there to rep for the Mag in his place, and I for one had a great me, and next year I suggest you all make plans to a end one of the summer’s best par es.

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Chapman’s 4th Annual Diabetes Ride - 2013 It was an unseasonably cool morning to say the least as I loaded my gear into Petoonia’s beer box zipped up my jacket to the very top put my gloves on and headed down the 404 to the 407 where I was to meet up with Durham’s Dangerous Donnie at the Dufferin St. underpass at a predetermined as he had decided to come along and keep me company for the day. Donnie has been covering some events for us lately and his wit and wisdom will fit quite nicely in the Mag. I’m not terribly familiar with the roads and stuff out that way so I had Google mapped our star ng point the day before and even printed it out………..twice one for each of us, and should have known exactly where we were going simply by referring to the handy print outs, which, as it turns out, I had conveniently forgo en at the office. In my mind’s eye I

could see the maps stacked neatly, right where I le them, in a spot where it would be impossible for me not to see them …..and that is exactly where I found them when I got home.

Apparently I func on with a different defini on of impossible than everyone else. Why it didn’t occur to me to simply put them into Petoonia’s beer box immediately a er printing them as any right thinking individual might do, I have no idea. We call them “Cri er Moments” and they are ge!ng more frequent all the me.

Donnie was no help either so we figured if it’s close to here, one of the locals will know exactly where the Ohsweken Speedway (Which was to be the start the ride.) is and will give us clear and accurate direc ons and we will be there in a couple of shakes of a monkey’s tail. Not so. The first gas sta on where we bought gas (and if we had known that they wouldn’t be able to help us in our quest we may have,

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 22

and probably should have, held off on our purchase un l the required informa on had been secured.) so we con nued on and it was beginning to get frustra ng.

It seems that many of the locals don’t know their way around this area any be er than us from the other side of Lake Ontario where North is North and South is South (from our point of view at least).

We finally found a nice lady at a gas sta on in Brantford who put us on the correct path and once on that path we realized that if we’d just gone straight instead of right we would have been there forty five minutes earlier and save a whole lot of me and gasoline. Oh well just another “Cri er moment”!

We made a quick breakfast stop in beau ful downtown Ohsweken before con nuing on to the Speedway.

This is a great track that a racts some of the best racers around and provides some top notch entertainment for racing fans.

We got parked and tracked down Tim Chapman who along with his beau ful girlfriend Amy and a crew of volunteers, organize this annual event to raise awareness and funds for research to ba le this dreaded disease that affects so many people throughout the World.

He then introduced me to Bill Gregory from The Canadian Diabetes Associa on who is instrumental in making this event happen and they in turn introduced me to Glenn Styres the owner of The Ohsweken Speedway and Donny Hill who is a race driver and involved with Community Involvement for the Speedway who got on board with Tim and Bill to help build this event and the Speedway is a great venue and they want to be a big part of it.

There was already a good many riders there milling around and grabbing a coffee at the snack bar and just enjoying the day checking out each other’s rides. There were some interes ng four legged passengers out to take it all in as well. There were a lot of familiar faces there and I was surprised to see that our man Kaz was among them. With three Riders Mag personnel on the ride I felt we were well represented.

Hey the more the merrier!

The weather was losing its chill and jackets and gloves and other warm apparel began disappear-

Chapman’s 4th Annual Diabetes Ride - 2013 ing as we waited for the start of the ride with Tim and Amy and crew registering the wave a er wave of new arrivals.

It was ge ng to be a pre y large gathering out there under those clear blue skies.

It was ge ng close to start me and Tim gathered everyone around to give everyone an idea of what the ride was about and the mo va on, emo on, behind it and the dedica on and hard work necessary to make it happen and what they want to achieve. He along with Bill Gregory introduced those who helped make it happen and expressed thanks to The Ohsweken Speedway owner Glenn Styles for all that he and their staff had done to help.

They thanked all the Clubs and organiza ons who had done such a great job like The Iron Riders who were out in large numbers for the ride and do blocking for the pack and all who came out for their support.

With that we went to our bikes and got ready to roll out for a beau ful ride on a beau ful day with some really great people.

We made our first stop which was mostly a much needed pee break in Cayuga and then headed out on the next leg of the run des na on Fenwick.

Donnie and I headed out ahead of the rest so as to get some pictures of the large pack not wan ng to get too far ahead as we didn’t really have a clue as to where we were going and we didn’t want to dri too far away as we do get lost very easily.

We waited on the roadside and got some great shots; that done I threw my camera back in its case and we tore off in hot pursuit.

We followed along on some interes ng roads through the amazing countryside at a good pace. Not so fast that you couldn’t take in some of the beau ful scenery around you but you never felt bogged down either.

There were a couple of incidents that happened in this lag however. Nothing major but they did cause some of us some concern.

We no ced the pack ahead of us star ng to veer around something ahead and no ced a small group of riders at the shoulder of the road in some sort of distress, but they were waving us around them assuring us that they had it all under control. So we con nued on.

The next incident involved a very squirrely red squirrel and the breaking of a rule of motorcycle riding.

Now first off I didn’t know it was an actual official rule or that there are things wri en down and perimeters and limits and what not in place to deal with the ma er that was about to take place. That is un l Dangerous Don-

nie informed me of the existence of this rule later that day. He didn’t tell me the rule number or the name of this alleged “Official Rule Book” from which it allegedly came but he wouldn’t lie about something like that…..Would he?

I simply have always gone by the assump on that if an animal runs out in front of the vehicle especially a motorcycle, you are driving and if it’s big like a moose, bear, deer, horse or Ye you do your best not to hit it.

The animal just fucked up or he’s actually is trying to kill you! Either way an animal of large stature or size you try not to hit.

If, however it is a small animal like a squirrel, chipmunk, cat, etc. that does comes into your path, they either, just fucked up, are commi ng suicide or just too stupid to live and you run over them. You don’t endanger yourself, your bike or others around you by performing too many evasive moves to avoid something

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 23

Chapman’s 4th Annual Diabetes Ride - 2013 that is going to result in a slight bump and may require some minor wiping or washing or if it was a skunk fumiga ng and changing of clothes.

I know it is human nature not to want to kill something but shit happens.

Now the rule according to Triple D (Durham’s Dangerous Donnie) is; “If it’s small enough to eat in one si ng you hit it. If it’s going to take several si ngs involve a butcher or could feed an en re family for any length of me you avoid it.” It all seems pre y straight forward to me.

However….As we rode along on this great road on this kick ass day, the sun shining brightly above causing nice li le flares of light reflec ng off of the chrome and shiny paint of the motorcycles in our large pack, and the sweet wonderful music that can only be produced by a large pack of motorcycles, at a good pace, and we slowed as we came upon a small village when I no ced some movement from a lawn just ahead.

A red squirrel that was frolicking on the lawn suddenly upon seeing the pack either had overwhelming suicidal urges that caused him to run directly towards the pack or perhaps he/she was ea ng something other than just nuts maybe something hallucinogenic.

I don’t know but I do know it ran out and was almost squashed by a rider who apparently knew the rule and would have used it but the fana cal li le creature

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 24

turned at the last Nano second with a move that Bobby Orr would have been in awe of and ran back to the shoulder safe and sound then for some inexplicable reason turned and ran back again this me though in the path of a rider unaware of the rule who braked hard which in turn caused great distress to those following.

It all turned out well though with no injuries or damage to anyone or any bikes but it did cause some anxious moments.

The squirrel? He made it through to the other side of the road and was probably laughing his fool squirrel ass off from the safety of the bushes, wai ng for the next bunch of riders to come through so he can play it all over again.

I wanted to turn around and ride through again just to show it that you can play one game one too many mes!

Anyhow we got to Fenwick (Home of the Fabulous Fenwick Lions and host to Biketoberfest.) where they had the barbecues going full blast, live entertainment and lots of ac vi es. They set up for the “Bo le Toss Game” where you pitch a Twoonie at a bo le of Crown Royal and the one who gets closest wins the bo le. Kind of like horseshoes for drinkers.

I wandered around and did find out the cause of the first incident with the group of riders on the side of the road.

Angel, a good friend who was on the ride had a wasp go right in her le" ear as she rode along. It was s nging her and the more she tried to get it out, the more it stung her. They all stopped and tried to flush it out with water and dig it out with a small s ck.

They did manage to get it out and she seemed to be OK. I tried hard to resist saying anything…… really hard………I mean really, really hard!

It could have been a real bad situa on with horrible consequences, I didn’t want to be insensi ve or unsympathe c or anything like that, but she was OK now and the wasp was gone. Stabbed with a s ck drowned and stomped on several mes and Angel is a dear friend and has a sense of humour so I told her, apologizing in advance and prepared to be hit.

“Angel, if in future, a bee, wasp or anything else lands in your le" ear.” I leaned in close and li"ed her pre y blonde hair from the right side of her head and demonstrated the technique.

“Have someone blow into your right ear and it will just pop out the other side.”

She took

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 25

Chapman’s 4th Annual Diabetes Ride - 2013 it well and I’m s ll in one piece.

We had a great me in Fenwick as those folks at the Lions Club really know how to do things up right but we had to move on as there were s ll two more stops.

Off we went and arrived at the Legion in beau ful downtown Smithville. Where we enjoyed some snacks and the hospitality in the comfort of the huge beau ful pa o for a while and it was now ge ng really warm so I was more than a li le happy to find out that they did indeed have 50.

On to the last stop which was the fantas c Legion in Grimsby. Talk about a pa o. Wow! They had the barbecues going full bore and the aroma of the burgers, hotdogs and sausages made my mouth water along with some great entertainment.

There was a silent auc on with lots of great items up for bid. They also had door prizes galore!

I wandered a bit and was pleasantly surprised to see one of my favourite Canweb Printing people in a endance out

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 26

enjoying a cold beverage on a great day at a favourite watering hole. I tried hard not to talk shop.

I was having a great me but it was ge ng late and it was me for me to head back to the wilds of Newmarket, so I worked my way around saying my goodbyes, looking to run into Tim and found him near the bikes saying goodbyes to others and corralled him.

When you talk to Tim there is no doub ng his sincerity, mo va on or commitment to this cause. He was happy with the turnout and the results of this year’s event but always strives to do more and do it be er.

He’s already working on next year’s event and has some great plans in the works to make the 5th Anniversary Ride the best yet and set the mark even higher for future rides.

There were approximately 190 bikes out enjoying the day and each other’s company on a well thought out and laid out ride and they raised around $9000.00 to fight this disease.

Great job to all concerned.

See you next year!

Joke

Personally - I think the gun was overkill - and yellin’ don’t ever come back! was unessassary. the only way they’ll come back is in their nightmares!!

WOMEN’S HUMOROUS SEX My husband came home with a tube of K Y jelly And said, ‘This will make you happy tonight.’

He was right!

When he went out of the bedroom, I squirted it all over the doorknobs.

He couldn’t get back in.

ELDERLY SEX One night, an 87 year-old woman Came home from Bingo and found Her 92 year-old husband In bed with another woman.

She became violent and ended up pushing him Off the balcony of their 20th floor, Assisted living apartment, killing him instantly.

Brought before the court On the charge of murder, The judge asked her if she had Anything to say in her defense.

She began coolly, ‘Yes, your honor.

I figured that at 92, If he could have sex...

He could also fly.’

The Penis Poem--by Willie Nelson My nookie days are over, My pilot light is out.

What used to be my sex appeal, Is now my water spout.

Time was when, on its own accord, From my trousers it would spring.

But now I’ve got a full me job, To find the bloody thing.

It used to be embarrassing, The way it would behave.

Page

For every single morning, It would stand and watch me shave.

Now as old age approaches, It sure gives me the blues.

To see it hang its li le head, And watch me e my shoes!!

Andy an 80-year-old Scotsman went to the doctor for a check-up.. The doctor was amazed at what good shape he was in and asked: ‘How do you stay in such great physical condi on?’ ‘I am Sco sh and I am a golfer,’ said Andy: ‘and that is why I am in such good shape. I am up well before daylight and out golfing up and down the fairways. I have a wee glass of whisky, and that’s it.’ ‘Well,’ said the doctor, ‘I am sure that helps, but there has to be more to it. How old was your Dad when he died?’ ‘Who said my Dad died?’ The doctor was amazed. ‘You mean you are 84 years old and your Dad is s ll alive How old is he?’ He is 105 years old,’ said old Andy.

‘In fact he golfed wi’ me this mornin’, and then we went to the topless beach for a walk and had anither wee dram and that is why he is s ll alive. He is a Scot and he is a golfer, too.’

‘Well,’ the doctor said, ‘that is great, but I am sure there is more to it than that. How about your Dad’s Dad? How old was he when he died?’ ‘Who said my Grandad is dead?’

Stunned, the doctor asked, ‘You mean you are 84 years old and your grandfather is s ll living! Incredible, how old is he?’

‘He is 127 years old,’ said the old Sco sh golfer. The doctor was ge ng frustrated at Continued Page 46 this point: ‘So, I guess he went

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Winter Storage 905-776-1111 Available 7 MAIN STREET EAST SELKIRK ONTARIO N0A 1P0 THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 27

Wider Ass Softail

This month’s feature guy is Mike and this beauty is his second build that has appeared in the mag, his first being an early wide re rigid that we called the “Wide Ass Rigid” way back in the June 2001 issue. Mike is also the reason that we demand a phone number with all applica ons because he was the first email only applica on we had ever received and back then he was terrible at replying to emails, but he did have his shit together with bike, girl, etc gratefully we haven’t had to go through it since.

THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 28

This bike has been on our list for a few years now and man he has been pa ent as we try to line up our applicants with our schedule and more than a few hiccups along the way trying to get our schedule to match up with all the shoot subjects it has taken us 3 or more years just to finally get it together and get our trip planned and coordinated.

Mike brought this bike down to one of the last Canadian Biker Build Offs to be judged by the Interna onal Master Bike Builders Associa on and I happened to be over wandering through that area when he bike was being inspected at their tent and I recognized him and he said this was his latest ride

Wider Ass Softail

and that maybe we should feature it, I agreed and he sent his latest contact info including phone number and he has been wai ng ever since.

This bike is pre y incredible and is a definite evolu on of bike building over the course of a decade or so with a rear re many mes wider than the previous bike, a so ail frame as opposed to a rigid, many hundreds of hours of bodywork detail on the frame, swingarm, and seat pan before the paint could be applied, but it has the same motor as the last build, yeah he sold the old bike off in parts and kept the motor for his next build.

Mike is a painter and has worked in the Automo ve trade since 1980 and as me has gone by he has aimed his paint gun at just about everything you could imagine, applying custom paint to street rods, motorcycle parts and likely a few other things that run on snow or water over the years. He owned a mid eigh es Harley So ail, the bike was involved in an accident and when he got paid out on the collision he decided that instead of buying another factory bike he was gonna build his own.

He had been doing a lot of paint work for a local bike shop in the Oshawa area so he had easy access to parts and he just ordered up what he needed, when the first bike was parted out he had them build him a chopper to ride for a few years because he had a lot of things going on in his life and didn’t have me to build a bike.

When the me was right he started assembling the parts to build this bike ordering in the frame and ge ng to work

on moulding all the welds in on it and then adding the fancy bodywork to the front of the frame, swing arm and seat pan before first applying the paint. Mike knew ins nc vely that more was to come as he never even bothered to paint or customize the front fender, it’s s ll si ng in the shop in the bare metal that he bought it in.

He had the radical idea to customize the back fender a er paint and removed it in the fall and customized it on the theme of the rest of the bike, what he describes as pointy and frankly when we were up there doing the shoot that back fender drew my a en on in over and over again, it is just a li le amazing that it’s as solid as a rock, the paint is perfect, and the fender sits mere millimeters from the re but because it is mounted to the swingarm it maintains that perfect spacing.

To get the curves and thickness while maintaining rigidity he welded 3/16” rod onto the n of the fender then ground and sanded un l his fingers were sore moulding into the fender then repain ng the fender to match the rest of the bike. He says he does this every year when he decides that something can be be er or more perfect then he goes to

work on it in the fall. So each year it gets a li le wilder and all summer long he rides the bike, yup it’s his daily ride or at least it was un l he got himself a Decker a couple years back, and he acknowledges what we all already know, it’s hard to get off the couch once you get onto it.

But having said that Mikes s ll not finished with this most recent model saying that he plans to switch out the front end this fall for next year taking off the chromey front end that’s been on this bike since the build in favour of something that he describes as a li le more pointy to go along with the theme of the rest of the bike.

So he s ll rides his chopper daily and uses the Decker for rides to the store to do his shopping, he and his partner recently acquired a body shop which gives him a place to work on his bikes and a full me job doing collision work and yes he does body work on cars when there’s no paint work to do saying it’s just the two of them so there’s no specialists.

Business can’t be too bad he’s started work on another build, a nice bobber for himself and although he’s got most of the parts on hand, engine, transmission, frame, apes, and seat he can take his me on it as he’s s ll not really finished with the wider ass so ail yet, all that’s le is to wonder when it’s finished and he moves on to the bobber, will he sell it whole or in pieces?

THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 29

Bikers Church

Wider Ass Softail Owner: Mike D City: Ajax, ON

Frame

Year: 2006 Builder: Maximum Metal Work Year & Make: 2006 Maximum Type: So ail Metal Work Rake: 44” Model: Custom Stretch: 6” backbone, Assembly by: Owner 2” lower downtube

Gereral

Engine Year: 2006 Model: Street / Strip Builder: S & S Displacement: 113 c.i.

Lower end: S & S Pistons: S & S Rods: S & S Flywheels: S & S Balancing: S & S Cylinders: S & S Cases: S & S Heads: S & S Valves: S & S Cam: S & S 640 Li ers: S & S Igni on: H2 Coils/Wires: Dana Carb: Super G Air Cleaner: Spike Pipes: West Coast Choppers

Transmission

Accessories Handlebars: Owner Controls: Billet Seat: Owner Tailight: L.E.D. Oil Tank: Maximum Metal Work Gas Tank: Rolling Thunder Front Pegs: Billet Rear Pegs: none Foot Controls: Hammer Custom Electrics: 12 Volt Grips: Hammer Custom Headlight: Yes Speedometer: Dakota Digital Mirrors: 1

Front End Type: Telescopic Year: 2006 Extension: 4” over

Wheels

Year: 2006 Make: Baker Right Drive Type: 5 Speed Shi ing: Foot Clutch: B.D.L. Primary Drive: B.D.L.

Front

Pain ng

Rear

Moulding: Owner Paint: Candy Burgundy over Liquid Silver Type: House of Kolor Painter: Owner

Size: 21” Type: Billet Tire: Avon Brake: Performance Machine Fender: not yet Size: 330 Type: 12” Tire: Tubeless Brakes: Performance Machine Fender: Custom by Owner Model: Kris na

THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 30

The ride season for us Ontario riders is shu ng down quickly now. I would say the colour rides are over and many are looking at pu ng their bikes away for the winter.

You might be asking what happened in the last Mag, have you ever thought that you have done something but in actual fact you didn’t do it, well that’s what happened I was so busy with a ending events I thought I did it but I guess I didn’t.

Thanksgiving has came upon us and is gone for another year, Here is a li le story that will give us a check and maybe we need to get in contact with a few people or get on our knee’s.

Nine-year-old Charlie was asked to say the blessing for the Thanksgiving meal. Charlie was always the polite one of the boys. Billy was the mischievous one. Charlie began his prayer by thanking God for his family and his friends, naming them one by one. Then he began to pray for the food. He called every item by name: the green beans, mashed potatoes, coleslaw, corn, bread pudding, the apple sauce, dinner rolls, the pecan pie, and the chocolate cake. Then he began to pray about the turkey. He prayed, “That turkey looks so juicy and good. Thank you, mom, for preparing it. Thanks for the car that brought the turkey home from the grocery store. And for the man at the market who bagged the groceries and put them in the car. And thanks for the meat department worker that put the turkey on the shelf, for the worker who took the turkey off the truck, the driver of the truck who brought the turkey from the meat packaging company, for the ones who cleaned the bird and wrapped it up, for the farmer who raised the turkey.” Charlie paused. “Have I le anyone out?” he said to himself. By now, the whole family was wondering when his prayer would end.

They were hungry and ready to eat. Just then Billy, Charlie’s mischievous brother, blurted out sarcas cally, “Well, you’ve thanked everyone but God!” Without missing a beat, Charlie said, “I was ge ng to him.” It seems that at Thanksgiving we thank everyone and so we should. We wish everyone a happy “Thanksgiving.” We should thank the people that have contributed to our lives, we should consider our forefathers, and we should praise our family and friends. But let’s not forget God. He is the source of all blessings. Will we ever get around to God? Or have we simply forgo en him?

Have you ever given thanks for the small things like our fingers, hands, minds , ears, mouth and what about our beings. Remember without someone not having the inven ng mind our rides might have been something we pushed instead of riding, that is a terrible thought.

It is exal ng, delicious, to stand embraced by the shadows of a friendly tree with the wind tugging at your coa ail and the heavens hailing your heart, to gaze and glory and give oneself again to God — what more could a man ask? Oh, the fullness, pleasure, sheer excitement of knowing God on earth! I care not if I never raise my voice again for Him, if only I may love Him, please Him . . . If only I may see Him, touch His garments, and smile into His eyes.” Here was a man thankful for his rela onship with God. Here was a man who was known by God and knew God. He shared his name and his character. Are you thankful for your rela onship with God? Or has it grown stale and common place? Do you take it for granted?

Bob Edens was blind. He couldn’t see a thing. His world was a black hall of sounds and smells. He felt his way through five decades of darkness. And then, he could see. A skilled surgeon performed a complicated opera on and, for the first me, Bob Edens had sight. He found it overwhelming.

“I never would have dreamed that yellow is so . . . yellow,” he exclaimed. “I don’t have the words. I am amazed by yellow.

Bikers

Church

But red is my favorite color. I just can’t believe red. I can see the shape of the moon — and I like nothing be er than seeing a jet plane ying across the sky leaving a vapor trail, and of course, sunrises and sunsets. And at night I look at the stars in the sky and the flashing light. You could never know how wonderful everything is.â€?The next Â?me you step out at night see the stars and thank the One who put them in space. The next you catch a sunrise or a sunset, say a prayer of thanks to the one who created it. Or for that ma er when you see a rose, or a babbly brook, or a rainbow, or that ďŹ rst blanket of snow, don’t forget to thank the One who gave it to you and me, no strings a ached. Just a simple giÂ? so we can enjoy.

God is a caring God. Like Hallmark cards, “He cared enough to send the very best.� When he saw our need for forgiveness he sent his one and only Son to die for our sins. He did for us on the cross what we could not do ourselves. For that we should be eternally grateful.

Pastor Dave kawartha@bikerschurch.com

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P R O M U S . C A THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 31

1% Origin Life Magazine Creates the Mythology Life magazine sensa onalized the event by splaying a picture of a drunken sot laying across a motorcycle surrounded by beer bo les. Problem was the drunk wasn’t a biker and that the picture was staged. I guess the real story wasn’t all that exci ng.

The 1% is Born The American Motorcycle Associa on (AMA) rides to the rescue with its own media take. Ninety-nine percent of motorcyclists are decent people. The 1% causes the trouble.

Never has a deflec ng “it’s not me, its them” speech created such a powerful symbol for the bike clubs who wear the 1%er flashes with pride.

The Real Story Why did bike clubs start in California? Demobilised WWII veterans were dropped off in San Francisco Harbour. The white veterans went to Frisco and the blacks to Oakland.

So, what really happened July 4th, 1947? The veterans formed hundreds of small motorcycle clubs with names like the Boozefighters, 13 Rebels, Jackrabbits and the Yellow Jackets. The membership colours were club sweaters. Many called them the straightpipers for obvious reasons. These guys drank a lot, par ed, and rode their bikes. At first the AMA welcomed these clubs with open arms but not for long.

Thousands of bikes rode into Hollister, just south of Frisco from all over California and beyond. The 7-man police force decided to separate the town locals from the crowds of motorcyclists and set up roadblocks at either end of the main street.

The town’s 21 bars hit pay dirt. These veteran bikers learned to drink in the army and navy and consequently drank more.

Everyone thought it funny when some rode their bikes into some of the bars. The police advised the bars to close two hours early. The 3-day party overwhelmed the police as many bemused townspeople watched the show of impromptu drunken drag racing, wheelies, and burnout contests.

The local hospital treated about 60-bikers for various self-inflicted injuries. About the same number were arrested for misdemeanor disorderly conduct, public drunkeness, and reckless riding. Most were released as they sobered up. However, no one died, there were no rapes, arsons, loo ng, or other serious crimes. No locals were harmed.

On the Sunday about 40 CHP officers arrived and threatened tear gassing.

The bikers dispersed and le" town.

Fraud

by Donny Petersen

Never Get in the Way of a Good Story How bad was it? Five months later, Hollister sanc oned motorcycle races and the bars welcomed the same bikers back with open arms. However, this was never reported as it would have go en in the way of a good story.

In the Wild One, the BRMC (Black Rebels Motorcycle Club) roars into town with their president, Johnny played by Marlon Brando. Johnny does not ride a Harley. Brando rides his personal bike in the movie, a Triumph Thunderbird 650cc.

He doesn’t look like a real biker of the day. Brando is clean cut.

Chino played by Lee Marvin is not. His character oozes reality and bases on Willie Forkner be er known as Wino Willie of the Boozefighters. Chino is grizzled with a cigar stuck in his mouth. He heads up the bad guys, The Beetles MC. He and his boys ride Harley-Davidson’s…and he’s looking for trouble. “I love you Johnny. I’ve been looking for you in every ditch from Fresno to here, hoping you was dead.”

In another scene, the pre y small town waitress asks wide-eyed “Hey Johnny, what are you rebelling against”?

The iconic Johnny replies, “What’ve you got” as he coolly taps his fingers on the counter to the jukebox jazz.

Lee Marvin studied violin as a youth. He rode a Triumph 200cc Tiger Cub in real life compe ng in AMA desert races.

The story goes that George Chris e of Ventura California buys the red-and-white horizontally striped shirt that Chino wears in the movie. Another report in www.edwardre.com/ bike/FamousBikers.aspx disagrees, saying that the “San Francisco chapter president Frank Sadilek bought the striped shirt that Lee Marvin wore in the movie.

Sadiilek wears the iconic shirt when mee ng with police officials.” Regardless, to this day, members will wear a same style shirt.

Here I am in 2012 reading about the “boot suit” between Brando’s estate and Harley-Davidson. It ma ers not that Marlon Brando did not ride a Harley-Davidson in real life or the movie. However, it appears that Marlon’s leather calf-high boots with a buckle on each one have an appeal to the modern biker.

Ahhh, why not market a Harley T-shirt with red and white stripes from Lee Marvin’s character? Wrong image. The image of a rebellious, independent soul who is really a good guy underneath it all is what we are a"er. Hopefully, the image depic on organizes charity runs in his middle years.

In March 2012, Brando Enterprises LP and Harley-Davidson, Inc. along with Wolverine Worldwide Inc. (the current boot manufacturer) se le a lawsuit over the unlicensed use of the Brando name on a Harley-branded boot that resembles the ones that Johnny (Brando) Strabler wore in the Wild One in 1953.

Brando Enterprises did not authorize H-D to use the name. However, Brando Enterprises has licensed other products including the Triumph that Marlon Brando rode in the Wild One. donny petersen

My Books Make Great Christmas Gifts

Donny’s Bookstore

www.donnypetersen.com

THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 32

www.donnypetersen.com www.usabooknews.com/donnypetersen.html www.usabooknews.com/petersen.html

MY

NO TAX FALL BOOKING SALE ON ALL NEW TRIKE ORDERS

AUTHORIZED DEALER FOR: THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 33

THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 34

Kitchener H-D’s 110th Anniversary Bash by Kaz By the me you get to read this, most of you will have already seen the preview of what’s to come for 110 Anniversary Harley Davidsons.

For me well lets just say that I love -REPAIRS TO ALL my 100th Anniversary Decker and I MAKES AND MODELS won’t be dealing it off on anything -SAFETY INSPECTIONS newer. The weather was far less than -AC SERVICE stellar for the unvailing of the 2014 Harley Davidson line at Kitchener Harley’s 110 Anniversary Party on September 7th. Overcast, Raining on and off and just a bit above the chaps 1200 TWINNEY DR. UNIT 10 & gloves kind of day. That is unless NEWMARKET ONTARIO L3Y 9E4 you decided to venture a ride in from out of town.

The first thing you no ced was Wall-E the jumping gym.

Of course no big kids allowed. On display were 6 of the most technologically advanced bikes that Harley has ever produced. The new twin cooled models. The Harley trike, Electra Glide Ultra, Road King, Street Glide & Street Glide Special and the updated Dyna Fat Bob. The Street Glide Special and the decker are the only 2 currently available for test drives. GPS, digital touch screen dash, voice ac vated stereo. Add blue tooth for cell phone and you can take your life and facebook everywhere. Targe ng the next genera on of Harley riders with all the technology us old school boys try to escape from. All joking aside Harley has made great strides in creature comforts department.

These include features like 103 cu.in. (110 cu.in in the CVO) of twin cooled V-twin engine, LED day me running lights, dual Halogen Headlights, extensively redesigned LED rear lights for increased visibility and Reflex ABS braking system are just the highlights of the new project Rushmore bikes. Drop in and check them out for yourself.

Those that braved the below seasonal temperatures and the MULTIPLE intermi ent, irrita ng drizzle, AWARD WINNING were treated to tunes cranked out

by Mississippi Thud and One Bald CUSTOM SHOP Tire. The Tillsonburg Kinsmen were cooking up the burgers, fries and SERVICE AND CUSTOMIZING FOR ALL BRANDS serving the suds all in support of HARLEY-DAVIDSON SUZUKI YAMAHA HONDA KAWASAKI TRIUMPH VICTORY Ka e Amber Claire. Ka e has a rare disease called Baton disease. OUR SHOP IS FULL OF ACCESSORIES During the day a draw was made AND BLING TO MAKE ALL BRANDS OF from all those who had purchased & financed a new Harley from MOTORCYCLE YOUR OWN Kitchener Harley. The winner Omar COME SEE US has his next 12 monthly payments made for him. Mike Duncan with FOR ALL YOUR John Emrich from the MS Freedom WINTER ride presented the keys to the 2013 Iron won by Octavio Amaral. And so SERVICE another Harley convert is spawned. AND REPAIR For us old schoolers that grew up on rigids, 45’s, pans & shovels, today THINKING OF YOUR PROJECT BIKE marks the beginning of a new breed COME TALK TO JOHN AND GET IT ROLLIN’ of techno-geek riders.

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THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 35

DANNI’S Well a lot of events have passed and now we are in October now with lots s ll to do… I went to Dover this September and it was fantas c..Bikes arrived early and Main Street was ge ng full by 8 am, the middle was almost full….

You’ve Got A Friend…Carole King .At 7:30 in the morning we were walking down Main St… you will not believe who we saw out there taking pictures …

Cri er with his camera catching all the ac on… in the middle of the street…..He did not want to miss anything…He was early enough… Sr. was also there..but I could not find him.

He had gone into the restaurant where we all gather but with the lineup, no-one would have found him… The early birds get the best pictures and breakfast.……

You just call out my name….

Dover is Dover..if you were meant to bump into someone.. you will….The day needs to play its course…you never know who you will bump into…believe me…I am up to a ending the December 13th…lets hope the weather is s ll nice…best way to bring the Biker Christmas in….Jerry, Lets try December…I have friends I try to see..never get to though…I Know they are there……

Winter, Spring, Summer or Fall Another event I had planned to a end this season and managed to follow through was, Biketoberfest ….in Fenwick…I had always read so much about it and it is the largest held Niagara event, I could not pass on it.

And you know wherever I am…

This event started as a one day event but with the Ride of Flags on the Friday evening , it is now a two-day event. All the proceeds go to the Lion’s Founda on of Canada, Alzheimer Society of Niagara Founda on and various Community Projects. We wanted a ride..and needed a change and this event was a good ride…... it was a great ride……and for this writer finding Fenwick was a bit of a challenge…I went to far.. but turned around just in me and with a li le help found the right way…

I’ll come running to see you I did need to stop and ask again… the town of Fenwick is so quaint and lunch was great at the bakery.. they had tables and chairs outside….. The Friday , September 20th was a great day…warm..sun shinning….. As we entered the event on the Friday , vendors were se ng up…and The Lions were se ng up for the arrival of the Flag Ride… Admission is a dona on….The ride arrived from the original Clare’s and had a good number of Riders. Managed to talk to Bikers from New Brunswick who a ended Dover and stayed over for this event.. The BBQ that evening was great and everyone was friendly..

We stayed overnight and our neighbors were…Len’s Automo ve & Performance who specializes in Motor Trike

THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 36

TIMES Sales and Installa on..They adver se here in the mag.. They had brought some trikes and they were the main a rac on for quite some me. As we were se ng up , Len and company took the trikes for a ride……… What a great day !

The next morning was a challenge..we all woke to rain… and lots of it…But the Biketoberfest Team made sure all was scheduled events were s ll going on and all were looked a er…It was slow t start but the rides did start to ride in and the celebra on did begin…

Winter, Spring, Summer or Fall The riders waited ill noon and it did ease off for a short me…Music was great…the only element that could ave been dismissed was the rain. Niagara Dice Run came in also with quite a few bikes..even though it was pouring they were riding… I have included a few shots taken at the event… I would like to send congrats out to….The Harley Davidson Ultra Classic Electric Glide- Rob & Sharon Hall 2nd Prixe of- $1000.00- to-Don Ward 3rd prize of $500.00 to John Malcolm The Show & Shine Winners: Stock- 1st- Kevin Cassellman 2nd- John McLean Mild Custom- 1st- Sco Gilbert 2nd- Biff Christenson Trike- 1st- John Dixon 2nd- Marilyn Richardson Best of Show- Michael Walter Niagara H.O.G. Dice Run- Winner of Best Dice- Len Evans Ain’t it good to know you’ve got a friend….

I would like to say a special thanks to Len’s Automo ve & Performance for helping us out..We got stuck…but we had help immediately…Thanks….

Great event even with the rain..Again this writer looking forward to next year 2014…for this event…

Also must men on here hats off… or hair off..to Cindy Baranycz who cut off her hair, long hair and donated it for Sick Kids…. Fantas c Lady…….Cindy, you re my hero…

Ain’t it good to know you’ve got a friend….

I am talking about Hero’s now… I only know of the one’s in the Motorcycle Community who are special individuals that go out of their way to change the world. I am talking about Max Begley who has au sm.. Max’s family received an extremely condescending le er to his family taun ng Max as an individual…It was quite shocking to experience this anger … his family was devastated. The Clarington Canadian Motorcycle Cruisers sent out invita ons to all clubs n the area. I received an invite from Lou Devino. On Facebook….. and the invites kept coming….

All you have to do is call…And I’ll be there…..

The mee ng place was Newcastle Tim Horton’s …then to Max’s grandmother’s. Max received a vest making him a honorary member of the Cruisers. Max is also is an avid motorcycle admirer and was able to get on the bike and ride…. Durham Regional Police closed off Shipway Drive… they lead the procession for over 280 motorcycles and the hundreds more people who lined the street that night.. and to all the amazing individuals there….. $ 1200.00 was raised that night for Au sm Ontario….

Oh….yeah, yeah, you’ve got a friend…..

I consider our community the koolest because of these individuals who try and they do make difference…..Hero’s…..Hero’s in our motorcycle community…..

Ride Safe DANNI

The Breasts of Dover

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Shenanigans AOA Na onal Party 2013 Friday night, started off with the standard “Welcoming Commi ee”, the ever present BEU, snapping pictures and taking names, but once through the gauntlet, the party was on, for the AOA Na onal 2013. A"er 36 years of Outlaw brotherhood in Canada, members from near and far, converge on a hos ng clubhouse, for a weekend of great mes and camaraderie.

Through the day and night bikes rolled in with a steady rumble.

Support club members also came out for the fes vi es, adding to the growing number of party goers.

S a t u r d ay ’s

st E e B AD

ted M S” o V E R

M E O G “H UR B

CR I CATT R ER D C S R 13 E % W

CHECKERED FLAG

BAR & GRILL ON THE WAY TO SOMEWHERE

with Sherri O’Irish weather was unusually cooler than normal for early August, but it was s ll good riding weather, so who could complain.

Although only a few brave or crazy souls, jumped into the frigid pool, there were a lot of motorcycles to look at, and friends to catch up with. S ll more bikes rolled in during the day, to the cheers and shouts of the others.

There was even a brief appearance from Cri er, who shared some laughs over a couple of cold 50’s with CB and others. The house was rockin on through the night, with live music and a bonfire out back, which con nued on into the wee hours of the morning.

The next day, the weather was also good, with only a small sprinkle of rain, but soon enough the Brothers were up and at it again. Sunday Funday ensued as the bike games were held, and another night of partying was upon them.

A huge shout out to some of the hosting and visiting Ol’ Ladies and Probates, for serving up such excellent food, morning, noon, and night.

Throughout the weekend, veteran members, new patches, support club members, and probates, came together to show their respect, to their Brotherhood and to the GBNF Brothers of the Outlaws MC.

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THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 38

sherri@theridersmag.com

Dice Run to Biketoberfest September is usually a great month for riding in the Niagara area. This year we had some very hot summer days with beau ful sunshine all week long, but then the rain came in for the weekends. I had a gathering at my place on September 1st and just like clockwork, it started to rain as the guests started to arrive. The following weekend we had a memorial ride for Beau…a Niagara Hog member. We did a trial run on the Wed. before and it was a perfect day to ride out to the Niagara Parkway and follow the river down to Chippawa. We never even thought of having a rain date.

On Saturday, it poured but six bikers suited up for the ride anyway…it was cut short because of the small lakes across the country roads. Another week of beau ful weather but on my way to Port Dover on Friday the 13th, I hit another rain storm…short but cold. You can see the pa ern that was emerging and the Biketoberfest weekend was no excep on.

On Friday night, Bruce led a group on the Ride of the Flags around the Fenwick area. The ride ended at Centennial Park where the vendors were busy se ng up for Sat. It was a beau ful evening and Tom Mann from BikerTV was there to film the ride. I heard through the grapevine that next year’s Ride of the Flags will be led by the OPP Golden Helmets and they will do their Precision Squad Riding Show at dusk. If you have never seen their presenta on, it is worth the ride into Niagara.

On Saturday morning, it was raining…again. I rode into Chippawa to the Boathouse where a few people were having a great breakfast and wai ng to see who would be crazy enough to ride in.

Thirteen people registered for the Dice Run….but only ten bikes showed up to actually do the ride. Tradi onally, the first stop is at B.R.O. field out in the country in the Welland area. We usually do the second “roll of the bones” there but we decided to do all the rolls at the Boathouse…out of the rain. When we got to B.R.O. field, I told the group to stay up on the main road while I rode down Young Rd. into the parking area. I wasn’t sure what the condi ons were inside, so I decided it would be easier to ride in alone. I had to watch out for the large puddles and navigate a number of cars and trucks to turn around.

When I got off the bike, I got a round of applause from a number of B.R.O. members…I was the

by Rose

only one that rode in….so far. On my way out, two bikes were pulling in….I think one was Cri er because he said he was going to cover the B.R.O. Scavenger Run that day…if there’s an ar cle about it….I bet he’ll men on the rain.

We zigzagged around the Welland area to make a very special stop. We had to meet up with the Bride and Groom and lead them into Biketoberfest. The plan was straight forward…we ride in with a large group of bikes…last year we had over 150. We pull into the fenced in area, where the Show and Shine and the Beer tent are set up, and bring the Lucky couple up to the front of the stage… where the band was ready to play Born to be Wild. They would park there and we would ride around to the edge of the field to our preferred parking spots…sounds simple enough. We met Larry and Cindy, the Bride and Groom, and four other bikes at their house. We were 15 bikes when we pulled in and it was s ll raining. There was no way we were riding into the field…we could see where one bike rode in and had to get help to get out. This year, Lincoln County M.C. who organized the Show & Shine, had to set up on the asphalt and the number of bikes entered was scarce.

The minister, Fred Disher was ready and the band played

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 39

Dice Run to Biketoberfest on. Heather and Johnny, the camera man, from BikerTV were there to film the whole event.

The couple got married and had their wedding dance in the rain. I was surprised how upbeat Cindy was even with the small crowd, the rain and the mud. Heather interviewed Larry and Cindy, who never took off her chrome helmet. It will be interes ng to see that episode next season on BikerTV. Heather interviewed John Clare in front of the 2013 H-D CVO Ultra Classic Electra Glide that was being raffled off that a ernoon. Too bad John had his hat on backwards.

The second band was the Horns from Hell but the crowd kept ge ng smaller and smaller.

Bruce from the Fabulous Fenwick Lions Club said that their raffle sales, close to $13,000, were be!er that day than on Friday the 13th in Port Dover. The lucky winners of the bike were Rob & Sharon Hall from Bayfield who bought the winning cket in Dover.

by Rose

The winners of the Show & Shine were: Decker/Dresser First place Bear C. Vintage First place Doug S. Stock first place Kevin C. 2nd place John M. Mild Custom Full Custom Sportster Trike Best of Show

First place Sco! G. 2nd place Biff C. First place AJ M. First place Rob F. First place John D. 2nd place Marilyn R. Michael W.

The winner of the Niagara HOG Dice Run was Len. E. Lenny had a score of 23 and so did Doug, so we had to have a roll-off on the stage…now that I think about it we should have had a mud wrestling match to see who won. Both got very low scores but Lenny won the HD Clock and Doug won a set of 5 HD dice. It was a great day and a great event despite the rain….hope to see everyone there next year.

YEAH I’M TOO FUCKIN LAZY TO PICK UP THE RIDERS MAG FOR FREE! MAIL ME A YEARS WORTH FOR THE COST OF POSTAGE CANADA: $27.00 CDN, U.S.A.: $30.OO U.S.D. INTERNATIONAL: $60.00 CDN

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Motorcyco Beau On the Labour Day weekend we took a ride up the O awa Valley to a end the Snake River Rodeo which is about half way between Cobden & Pembroke at the invita on of a friend of ours, Sean Guest, who works at Freedom Harley Davidson in O awa. This was the 2nd year for the rodeo and while the sky was overcast, the clouds were high and we figured that the possibility of ge ng rained on was minimal. It was one of those nice lazy rides where there is lots of impressive scenery to take in and about an hour and change later we were pulling in to property where the Snake River Rodeo was being held and already there were about 50 or 60 bikes parked along fence running along the entry road and then across the field there was an area made up of campers, trailers and a few motorhomes parked near the stage, indica ng that some people intended to party the whole weekend. Once we found a good spot to get se led into, I took a quick tour around just to see what was going on and while I only actually knew of few of the folks from before, the rest of the people walking around that I bumped into wasted no me in coming over to introduce themselves and in my books that is the signal that a good me is about to happen.

THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 42

from the Far East.... of Ontario that is!

One of the familiar faces we did run into is a good friend of ours and as well a fellow shovelhead owner, was singer/ songwriter, Dean Batstone aka Skinny White Boy! Dean is well known in the O awa Valley and it turns out that he and the band were going to be the entertainment for the rodeo later that evening and while he now spends much of his me in the states touring and where he has played from the Hudson Valley in New York state down to New Orleans he always returns back to the valley to his roots.

While we like Dean’s music it is our mutual love of shovelheads that has been the core of our friendship over the years and if you have a chance go to his website and give him a listen because I am big on suppor ng Canadian talent.

Many of the folks who were in a endance were either presently ac ve military or ex-military and that just added to the sense of comradery I felt as we toured the whole rodeo area. We actually ended up staying about three hours longer at Snake River than we had previously expected and that just further showed me that we would be a ending this event come next year.

You can expect to see this event listed in the Mag next year because Sean men oned that the people running this event want to open it up and hope to welcome riders from not only the local area but also from much farther away and there was some discussion about the possibility that they may change the dates from the Labor day weekend because they felt many people are too busy that weekend and they really want to see their rodeo grow one day to being a major event in the valley.

In early September we par cipated in the Denny’s Motorcycle- Custom Car & Truck Charity Cruise-In Night which took place in the South Keys Plaza in the south end of O awa. This is the 4th year for this Fall& Spring event and both the weather & the turnout were impressive.

This par cular D e n n y ’ s restaurant has been very ac ve and suppor ve of the local motorcycle community in O awa and for the last two years has let TBC hold Sunday cruise nights for motorcycles only, in their parking lot and word is that the cruise night will be moving to a week night for the year 2014. Once every Spring and Fall the cruise night is opened up to custom cars and trucks etc., and all the proceeds from the registra on, 50/50 draw and profits from the outdoor BBQ are then turned over to a charity or cause. Last Spring it was The Cel c Brotherhood’s Awareness Campaign for Trauma c Brain Injury & PTSD that was the recipient and this Fall’s proceeds also went to TCB for their “Help Kick Start A Life Project” to acquire AED’s that will be brought on charity motorcycle rides as well as other motorcycle events just in case someone

Motorcyco Beau

may experience a heart a ack. One of the highlights of the evening’s fes vi es was when Roger “Bones” Nairne, won the 50/50 draw and donated all of his winnings to the AED Project in memory of the TCB’s mascot, “Garth”. Bones is a well known and respected member of the local Biker community and ac ons like his just goes to show you that bikers truly care about the community they live. Bones was also one of the founders of the “Ride for Noah” in support of a young boy who was ba ling brain tumors and who also happened to be his nephew.

Over 200 motorcycles and around 100 cars & trucks par cipated in this event and it has been bounced around that the owners of this Denny’s, who also own one in Belleville are hoping TCB will consider trying to get a sister event of this one opening up to the motorcycle community in Belleville. Keep your eyes open in the Mag for a possible announcement in the Spring. Aside from being a great me in general, one of the highlights of the evening was the winning of the best of show award, a metal sculpture of bike parts designed and donated to The Cel c Brotherhood by “Grinder” Maloney who for years has refused to sell his incredible sculptures he makes and will only donate to certain events such as the Capital City Bikers Church and of course, TCB. The award Grinder made was called “Da Bomb” and was awarded to Doug Taylor, from Freedom Harley Davidson, for his incredible Pan/Shovel hybrid that is an ongoing work of love for him over the last two decades plus and while there was some very deserving

THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 44

from the Far East.... of Ontario that is! bikes on display, Doug’s s ll resonates as tribute to the builder’s art.

Congratula ons! Brother Doug!

Some of the other people that I had a chance to spend some me with were Keith Fong, who also sits on the board of S.O.A.R. along with us and other good friends like Dwayne Haddad, Neil Eisenberg, all the boys from the Soldiers for Jesus and Harold McGee. A special thanks to all the guys from TCB, for dona ng their me to act as hosts for this event and making things work out so smoothly. Last but not least, Jeff from Denny’s South Keys for all his support & his parking lot.

There are many ways to celebrate the beauty of a gorgeous fall day and for at least 160 motorcycle riders on Saturday Sep 28th it was all about ge ng together with other motorcyclists and par cipa ng in the 2nd Annual Big Daddy’s Cowpaddy “Fall Foliage & Toy Run” which started off for the first me at a local Kemptville restaurant called Charley’s Place, situated at 7780 Merlyn Wilson Rd. Riders clad in their helmets and leather started rolling into the restaurant parking lot area as early as 8:00 am and by the me the actual ride started to head out at a li le past 10:30 am, the parking lot was filled with both riders and curious bystanders who wanted to see what was taking place and to roam about and browse at all the lines of different motorcycles. This ride is the brain child of Sue and Greg Kinghorn both of whom have spent years organizing ways to collect funds in support for various chari es with this par cular event focused on ge ng toys for children and especially ones with cancer. This ride was also dedicated in memory of a well known and respected motorcycle rider in the O awa biker Community, Peter George who sadly died in 2012 .

When it comes to charity, members of the motorcycle communi es are probably one of the most generous, with the average rider a ending at least five or more rides throughout summer with an average cost of anywhere from $20 to $25 not including any passenger and along with that o en a further show of support by purchasing an event t-shirt etc. One of the riders who a ended rode two hours to par cipate in the Big Daddy’s ride was from Harrowsmith, near Kingston. Slowly as the years go by it seems that once nega ve s gma a ached to beards, ta oos & motorcycles is disappearing and that was really obvious during this

Motorcyco Beau ride because as the long line of motorcycles roared down the highway, dozens upon dozens onlookers standing alongside the road were waving and cheering the riders as they passed and that is a sight that I never get red of seeing.

As I said in the beginning, it truly was a great way to celebrate a gorgeous fall day and we even had a chance to get some people to pose with a poster for the “Help Kick Start A Life” project started in honor of the mascot for The Cel c Brotherhood.

The ride itself took the par cipants on some of the more interes ng area back roads and allowed folks to take full advantage of the changing colors of the landscape and also took the me to allow for the necessary fuel fill-ups and some well deserved opportuni es for the riders to stretch their legs with the ride culmina ng near the village of North Augusta where a party took place as a way of thanking all those who took the me to enjoy the company of others while doing something special for kids.

Special thanks to Greg & Susie Kinghorn and all the Big Daddy’s Cowpaddy Crew for organizing this event and to all the men & women who graciously made the effort to come out to par cipate in the ride along with extra special thanks to Charley and all the staff at Charley’s Place for kindly making the restaurant and it’s parking lot available for the event registra on and start off. It is my hope that more & more groups in the Kemptville area will hold some of their future mee ng or dinners at Charley’s Place as a means of showing their support for a business that supports bikers.

Another event that I had the opportunity to par cipate in was the 14th Annual Ride of Splendor, a

from the Far East.... of Ontario that is!

Stock or Chopper Dyna Replacement Frames 1 Marconi Court Unit #9 Bolton ON

motorcycle riders. We are at some me or another going to need the services of a hospital and being able to enjoy a Fall day riding around with other motorcyclist’s in the Carleton Place area while suppor ng the local hospital is a bonus. They provided muffins & coffee at the registra on as well as lots of laughs and good food at the end of the ride. It was a cloudy and somewhat cool day but that didn’t seem to dampen the spirits of all those great people who par cipated.

I will write an ar cle about this ride as well as a couple of others that we par cipated in later on down the line.

All and all it was a great Fall riding season and a con nuing reminder of why I love doing what I do!

I want everyone to remember that as the days get shorter and they get colder, we will be pu ng on more clothing when we ride and the people driving in their cars are going to be even less likely to spot us out there, so please be careful!...I don’t want to lose anymore old friends or be robbed of the chance to make new ones!

As always..” We Make Our Biker/Motorcycle Communi es Stronger...By Making Them Be er!”....Brotherhood! Motorcyo Beau

Harley ! BSA ! Norton ! Triumph charity ride for the hospital in Carleton Place, about a half hour ride from O awa.

The fact that it is this ride’s 14th year is enough in itself of a comment on the par cipa on of the local

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What’s Shakin’ Dec. 13th – Port Dover See you there!

Dec. 14th- Hog Town Cycles Holiday Open House

9am- 3pm- Bring a Non Perishable food item for the Food Bank

Dec 25th. Merry Christmas Jan 1st 2014 - Happy New Year Jan 3rd - 5th The North American Interna onal Motorcycle Super Show Interna onal Centre – Toronto More info motorcyclesupershow.ca – 1-888-661-7469

Feb 1st – 2nd – 2014 O awa Interna onal Motorcycle Show EY Centre – 4899 Uplands Dr., O awa, On. More info – o awainterna onalmotorcycleshow.ca

Joke

Page

golfing with you this morning too?’ ‘No. Grandad couldnae go this mornin’ because he is ge ng married today’ At this point the doctor was close to losing it. ‘Ge ng married!!

Why would a 127 year-old bloke want to get married?’

‘Who said he wanted to?

In church, while reverently preparing for the service, I heard a sweet li le old lady, si ng next to me in the pew, quietly whispering a prayer. It was so sweet and sincere that I just had to share it with you.

She said, “Dear Lord, this has been a tough two or three years ...

You have taken my favorite actor Patrick Swayze, my favorite musician Michael Jackson, my favorite salesman Billy Mays, my favorite actress Elizabeth Taylor, my favorite singer Whitney Houston, and, now, my favorite announcer Dick Clark.

I just wanted you to know that my favorite poli cian is Dalton McGuinty.

Amen.”

Did you hear about the guy who had a map of Canada ta ooed on his ass?

Every me he sits down Quebec separates..

A man wrote a le er to a small hotel in a Midwest town he planned to visit on his vaca on. He wrote: “I would very much like to bring my dog with me. He is well-groomed and very well behaved. Would you be willing to permit me to keep him in my room with me at night?” An immediate reply came from the hotel owner, who wrote: SIR: “I’ve been opera ng this hotel for many years. In all that me, I’ve never had a dog steal towels, bedclothes, silverware, or pictures off the walls. I’ve never had to evict a dog in the middle of the night for being drunk and disorderly. And I’ve never had a dog run out on a hotel bill. Yes, indeed, your dog is welcome at my hotel. And, if your dog will vouch for you, you’re welcome to stay here, too.”

Just at the moment when the den st was leaning over towards his pa ent to start on her teeth, he was startled. “Excuse me, Miss, those are my balls that you are holding.” “I know” she answered sweetly. “Let us be very careful not to hurt each other.......OK?” The phone rings, and the wife answers. A pervert, with heavy breathing, says, “I bet you have a ght asshole with no hair.” Woman replies, “Yes, he’s watching TV - who shall I say is calling?”

The Volunteers A fire started on some grassland near a farm in Indiana. The fire department from a nearby town was called to put out the fire.

The fire proved to be more than the small town fire department could handle, so someone suggested that a rural volunteer

THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 46

Continued Page 54

Builder of the Month-JD Cycles To say that Owner of JD Cycles; Josh loves motorcycles and loves to ride would be a gross understatement. That overused cliché “Live to Ride – Ride to Live” that became almost an embarrassment to real riders as so many wannabes and weekend warriors who only seemed to want to own a motorcycle and had no real interest in actually riding one or truly embracing the lifestyle bought the patches, s ckers and chrome goodies with that slogan emblazoned on them while their motorcycles actually got out on the road very seldom. The bike, for many of them, was a nothing more than a passing fad or status symbol.

Not so for Josh, whose passion for motorcycles has taken him for a great ride through life! An interes ng and challenging ride to say the least and a ride that wasn’t without a few bumps in the road. It has been a ride that proves that for some, like Josh “Live to ride-Ride to Live” isn’t just a clever slogan created by some marke ng company trying to sell the image of a lifestyle to pretenders; it is what life is about like ea ng and breathing. It is best defined by another slogan “If I have to explain, you wouldn’t understand.”

He began working on his own bikes and for friends and in 1994 built his first complete, from the ground up project; a 96 cu. Inch shovelhead, 4 speed, kicker, in a ridged frame painted by good friend “Raggs” be er known today as Vince Goodeve, that was to be the first of many.

He kept on wrenching, building and doing repairs and building a reputa on as a good solid mechanic with a track record of ge ng things done and done right.

In 2000 Josh had a head on alterca on with a tractor trailer that saw

truck, bike and Josh all being hauled away in pieces. It cost Josh a leg, but he survived, and con nued wrenching but not being able to ride was killing him.

He had to get back on the road, feel the wind in his face and eat a bug or two, and being an ingenious and innova ve sort of a guy, he began coming up with ideas to compensate for his missing limb and get him back on two wheels where he belonged.

He made modifica ons to his bike; pu ng a kickstand inside the le saddlebag that was electronically controlled and was very effec ve, providing the stability needed to support him and his wife on the bike when they were stopped. It was prac cal and effec ve but the Insurance Company wasn’t as enthusias c about it as Josh was, as it wasn’t CSA approved and they cancelled his policy.

Not to be that easily deterred, he pressed on and a er inves ga ng what would be required to obtain that approval and deeming it too costly with too many hoops for a guy with one leg and limited tolerance for bullshit to jump through, he abandoned that solu on and looked at other alterna ves.

Josh’s long me friend Dino put him on to Lewayne Mathews and the search was over.

Lewayne had been working as a Nascar Engineer for 33 years and was developing a fixed axle rear end that would convert motorcycles into trikes easily and effec vely but had visions of an independent suspension system in the recesses of his mind and they remained there un l Josh’s requirements and input brought them to the forefront and made them

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THE RIDERS MAG ----- PAGE 47

THE RIDER’S MAG THE RIDER’S MAG THE RIDER’S MAG THE RIDER’S MAG

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Builder of the Month-JD Cycles the reality which, a er several prototypes were made and modified to get the geometry correct, 4 ½ years later it became the “Mystery Design”.

They use all 6061 Aluminum in the construc on, not cheap, but it is the best and the suspension is virtually indestruc ble in normal use and that is how they can offer a life me warrantee on their product.

Josh set about building his first Trike by conver ng a 2000 Dyna Wideglide and in the summer of 2006 “Ma lda” hit the streets and caused quite a s r.

He then built another using a 2007 Dyna Wideglide with the inten on of selling it, un l his wife Chris ne fell in love with it, and they kept it and she rode it for 3 ½ years un l he sold it to someone at the Niagara Motorcycle Show. Chris ne was not as excited (Pu ng it mildly!) about the sale as Josh was. So to get back in her good graces, he built her another, this me, a 2001 Custom Pro Street FXR to de her over un l he builds her something else.

All this was done just to get back on the road and thoughts of actually building and selling these trikes didn’t really occur to him un l he got those trikes out there on the streets and realized the tremendous interest levels that his builds were genera ng everywhere he went.

So in response to that interest, in 2008, he registered JD Cycles which he operates from his shop in Keswick and is the sole Canadian Distributor for these fully patented and approved suspension systems.

Not content with this revolu onary system alone, there are modifica ons in the works for a l ng mechanism. An op on, that that will actually allow the Trike to be leaned and ridden like a two wheeled motorcycle and take riding a trike to another level to sa sfy those riders seeking more of an adrenaline rush rather than those content with just a great

riding trike. They hope that it will be approved and available by the Spring of 2014.

The demand for the trikes has been incredible and he has been building bikes to suit the needs of customers from across Canada and Northern USA. They can be a simple bolt on conversion to a motorcycle or a full on custom build. Josh can make your wildest dreams of a motorcycle come true and can make what you might have thought to be impossible a reality.

He can custom fabricate parts to overcome or compensate for physical limita ons or handicaps or just build you a bike that looks and rides great. He can individualize the trike to suit your exact and specific needs or desires.

The kits will work on any belt or chain drive motorcycle whether domes c or Metric and can work on sha drive as well, however extra, special machining and fabrica on is required for sha drive bikes.

Stock bike conversions can be restored back to original and the suspension adapted to your new bike if you want to upgrade your ride down the road and the Life me Warrantee on the suspension system is transferable.

However, JD Cycles is not just Trikes. They offer regular builds, custom builds that range from Mild to Wild, custom part fabrica on, full service and maintenance, res and anything else it takes to put you and your motorcycle on the road and keep you there.

Through his vast network developed over the years Josh can arrange anything, paint, custom paint, upholstery repairs, custom upholstery, CNC machining, chrome, powder coa ng. You name it! They’ve done it and can get it done! They thrive on challenge at JD Cycles.

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by Dangerous Donnie from Durham

Hello fellow inmates…

On Sept 7th I a ended an old style Biker wedding held outdoors at the Ancaster Fairgrounds…the Bride and her party were each seated on back a fleet of HD’s, rode right up the aisle to meet the Groom who dressed for the day in jeans and his club colours..

Prior to the formal es the faithful gathered round a big top tent with the bar.. and once the procession was moving we massed around the bridal party with drink in hand…(I like that) Several MC’s were in a endance as well as the family and friends of Ralph (the Hammer) and his pre y bride Sandy.

The trek from the east end of Toronto for the trip to Ancaster… was a cold rainy sloppy day .. most simply caged it ..those that rode were drenched to the bone by the me they hit the highway…

But somehow when Pastor Ken of Biker Church showed up to officiate the ceremony, the skies cleared ..and the bad weather moved on to piss on someone else’s parade…

The party that followed was the best…tons of drinks and food followed…a roast pig with all the trimmings.. music by the Prac cally Hip who were just the best I have heard live in long while.. all in all a emp ng ‘ an outdoor anything this season was a real roll of the dice..

But the Bride and her crew pulled it

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108 Beaumont Cres. Guelph, Ont THE RIDERS MAG ---- PAGE 51

by Dangerous Donnie from Durham

Hello fellow inmates… off ..with the help of many…all the best to Hammer (my Zombie MC brother)…and Sandy …thanks for the most excellent me.

Dover.. well, Dover was Dover but it felt more like late November than September 13th ..ok I admit it, the cold gets to me more than it did 15 years back on my first PD13 exprience..It wasn’t the biggest crowd I have seen down there but it was s ll huge..

Jazuz Port Dover is

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crowded with 5000 people...when you get more than 20 mes that well you get the idea...but that’s what makes it the worth the trek down there..

I and several of my fellow ZMC hooked up at the crack of dawn and hit the 407...I basically did the “early in early out deal” …I saw lot of old and new friends…of course ran into Cri er on this usual corner with 1700 people talking to him at once… somehow he just keeps it rolling and never runs out of energy... But we’ll leave it to the rest to expand on their PD13 fes vi es... my usual regret is another year were I failed to find place to stay ovenight... and sorry but camping is out for this bas ge... as just when the fun starts I get the itch to ride home to avoid the frakin friday a ernoon traffic thru Toronto…

Well that’s all I can remember for Aug/ September… another season slipping away ….turkey day on the horizon…xmas ….new years…jazuz where did it go?.

We’ll cya at a bike show or something…

Dangerous Out!

Riding The

Southwest

By Gaurdrail

Boy 0 boy, did the summer ever go by 5XVW 3URRILQJ by quickly ! Or did we even have one ? Far Rust Authority with to many rainy days for my liking, and the creeping agent heat was terrible, now all the leaves are Cars $80.00+taxes turning color and falling o, I believe the Trucks/SUVs starting riding season is coming to an end. at $100.00+taxes Our health around the house took a 8QLERG\ )XOO )UDPH shit this year also, ďŹ rst I got the throat 6WUDLJKWHQLQJ cancer, just completed the internal :LQGVKLHOG 5HSODFHPHQW radia on, locked in a private room at hospital for 4 days , then sent to my QUALITY PAINT COLLISION 9HKLFOH 6WUXFWXUDO 6DIHWLHV bedroom at home for 7 more days, that $350 +taxes & RESTORATION SINCE 1973 'SFF $PNQVUFSJ[FE &TUJNBUFT was quite a bore, good thing for good IS CPEZ TIPQ SBUF friends who set me up with some great 2065 Allanport Road, Thorold, ON L0S 1A0 reading material, Roach for the large &XVWRP 3DLQW :RUN novel, and Bob and Deb for the load of

0 " &ROOLVLRQ 5HVWRUDWLRQV magazines they supplied me with from ! %,&$.(/&%+))(! %,&$.(/&%+))(-(+* %$ 0 (*'+ %,&$.(/&%+))(-(+* %$ on Any Type of Vehicle custom bagger to classic car and trucks.

Boy this sure made the me bearable. played at Billy’s Pub in Essex, and the Colchester Bar and Grill Thank you so much.

A#er me the wife had the brain tumor surgery and she is was the sponsor this year where folks got a steak dinner and the weather turned out nice recovering well.

The Essex County Riders stepped up with a dona on of Well the riding season was very slow for me as I only put about 5k on my bike, but am very happy to have been able to $1700, thanks to all of you. great job Goerge Winney from Forever Free Motorcycle Hearse is a par cipate in some fantas c rides here in Essex county The Queensmen M.C. had another great Shoot and Scoot, major player in organizing this event, and between him and par cipants were to ride or drive to 4 dierent loca ons, and his helpers they do awesome work for the at each loca on had a task to complete, from archery, spear mission, great job folks, I am proud to know toss, sling shot, tomahawk throw and re toss. The day as people like yourselves who donate such me usual on this event started with cloudy skies and rain, which and eort to make someone else’s life a li�le scared of some of the locals, as the day went on the sun more cheerful.

There were many more events in the area came out and dried everything up.

Back at the farm the guests were all cooking their own and Health, Family, Weather all play a roll in I missed them, I do try to get to as many T-bone steaks, which came with all the sides one could ask why

0 "

for, and the band 519 was playing inside, the awards were things/events as possible, especially those of our adver sers, ! %,&$.(/&%+))(-(+* %$ 0 (*'+ %,&$.(/&%+))(-(+* %$ ! %,&$.(/&%+))(given out and am sorry to say I could only read a few names un l next me Guardrail o my note pad as the papers got a liÂ?le wet, anyway the oldest player was Brian f and the youngest player was Dylan Kok. Everyone enjoyed themselves and the party lasted to the wee hours of the morning, 1200 Custom These guys have many more events coming , and a 55yr anniversary of the club in 2014 Loaded with Extra’s The Iron Horse M.C. had their annual party and as usual She’s Sharp! was a sold out event, the day gets rolling with a long list of on and o bike games, the par cipants have a great me playing these games from the plunger toilet paper roll, to the slow race, a load of laughs from all spectators and players alike. A#er the games and some party me, they served up a fantas c b-b-q pork dinner with all the ďŹ xins, a#er the diner the band played and the fun lasted and lasted..you are incouraged to bring a tent or sleeping bag as there is plenty

0 "

of room for everyone..i could not make this event this year but was told it was a very good night.. ! %,&$.(/&%+))(-(+* %$ 0 (*'+ %,&$.(/&%+))(-(+* %$ ! %,&$.(/&%+))(+ HST & Lic. The Red Devils M.C. Chatham had their annual Beef Bash, Certified and Serviced even though the party was scaled back a bit, the food was 29945 Hwy.48, Pefferlaw On. awesome as usual, And there was plenty of it, Including the desert table, where as usual I took more than one trip to 905-715-0070 / 705-437-2291 this. I could not stay at this party too late and had to aÂ?end another func on, was nice seeing everyone, and thanks again for the good me..

On A Mission For The Mission #5.....To Support the Windsor Downtown Mission More than 200 aÂ?endies raised over $7000 for the homeless and families living in Windsor. Biker games were

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1, Hamilton Road, London, Ont. N6B-1M9 fire department be called. Though there was doubt they could be of any assistance, the call was made. Five minutes later, the volunteer fire department arrived in a dilapidated old fire truck. They drove straight towards the fire and stopped in the middle of the flames. The volunteer firemen jumped off the truck and fran cally started spraying water in all direc ons. Soon, they had snuffed out the center of the fire, breaking the blaze into two, easily controllable parts.

The farmer was impressed with the volunteer fire department’s work and so grateful that his farm had been spared. The next day he presented the volunteer fire department with a check for $1000.

A local news reporter asked the volunteer fire captain what the department planned to do with the funds. “That should be obvious,” responded the captain. “The first thing we’re gonna do is get them damn brakes fixed on that there fire truck.” .

The Embarrassed Pa ent “Of course I won’t laugh,” said the nurse. “I’m a professional. In over twenty years I’ve never laughed at a pa ent.” “Okay then,” said Bob, and he proceeded to drop his trousers, revealing the smallest male part the nurse had ever seen. In length and width was almost iden cal to a AAA ba ery. Unable to control herself, the nurse tried to stop a giggle, but it just came

Page out. And then she started laughing at the fact that she was laughing. Feeling very badly that she had laughed at the man’s part, she composed herself as well as she could. “I am so sorry,” she said... “I don’t know what came over me. On my honor as a nurse and a lady, I promise That won’t happen again. Now, tell me, what seems to be the problem?”

“It’s swollen,” Bob replied.

She ran out of the room.

The Gas Problem An old woman came into her doctor’s office and confessed to an embarrassing problem. “I fart all the me, Doctor Johnson, but they’re soundless, and they have no odor.

In fact, since I’ve been here, I’ve farted no less than twenty mes. What can I do?” “Here’s a prescrip on, Mrs. Harris.

Take these pills three mes a day for seven days and comeback and see me in a week.” Next week an upset Mrs. Harris marched into Dr. Johnson’s office. “Doctor, I don’t know what was in those pills, but the problem is worse! I’m far ng just

as much, but now they smell terrible! What do you have to say for yourself?” “Calm down, Mrs. Harris,” said the doctor soothingly. “Now that we’ve fixed your sinuses, we’ll work on your hearing.”

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Call to the FBI The phone rings at FBI headquarters.

“Hello?”

“Hello, is this the FBI?” “Yes. What do you want?”

“I’m calling to report my neighbor Adrian Thibodeaux! He is hiding marijuana inside his firewood.”

“Thank you very much for the call, sir.”

The next day, the FBI agents descend on Thibodeaux’s house.

They search the shed where the firewood is kept. Using axes, they bust open every piece of wood, but find no marijuana. They swear at Thibodeaux and leave.

The phone rings at Thibodeaux’s

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