March 26-April 1 2012 Issue 1491 tntmagazine.com
WIN!
SURFING LESSONS FOR TWO IN DEV ON
QUIRKY EUROPE Sightseeing by beer bike or vodka tram
GET A GOOD ROASTING Where to find the best Sunday lunch in London
RITE OF PASSAGE Anzac Day, Gallipoli and top Turkey tours
N A M E L C A MIR
us Christ s Je r fo h c r a se um and his lb a w e n a g on launchin n a v o n o D n o Jas + HOUSE-HUNTING APPS TOP 5 DIVE SPOTS 48 HOURS IN BANGKOK ADVENTURE IN WALES
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THIS WEEK LONDONDIARY
4-5
LONDONNEWS
6
DRINK & EATS
14-15 16
SPOTTED
19
LONDON SOUND
20-21
LISTINGS CLUB & GIGS
22-23
COMPETITION
28
CHATROOM JAMES ALLEN
29
SPARE TIME
30-31 32
LIFESTYLE
33-41
SHOPPING
33
HEALTH & BEAUTY
34-35
CAREERS
36-37
MONEY
Photos: 4roues-sous-1parapluie.com; TNT Cover: Getty
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LONDON SCENE
EDITOR’S LETTER Jason Donovan was every teenage girl’s heart-throb when he first hit the big time in the Eighties. Flick to P24 where he talks candidly about his fall from grace, and his rise back up again. For another rollercoaster ride, read our Anzac Day account on P72 after our writer visited Gallipoli for the Dawn Service. After something a bit more lighthearted? See P66 for Europe’s best quirky tours. Enjoy!
WWW.TNTMAGAZINE.COM/APPS
MY LONDON
CAROL DRIVER EDITOR carol.driver@tntmagazine.com
39
LIVING
40-41
NEWS & SPORT
42-53
TRAVEL
55-78
72
FEATURES SUNDAY BEST
8
A converted barn and other great venues serving up a top roast for lunch.
BACK ON TOP
Aussie soap star Jason Donovan on his rise and fall (and fall and rise) from fame.
DIARY
56
WELSH ADVENTURE
NEWS
57
LATE DEALS
60
We get flushed down The Toilet, crawl through The Letterbox and The Wormhole.
HOTSHOTS
61
TOP FIVE
62-63
TIPS & STUFF
64-65
SHORTBREAK
66-68
48 HOURS IN... BANGKOK 70-71 CLASSIFIEDS DESPERATELY SEEKING
80-113 114
8
24
TOURS LESS ORDINARY
58
66
Forget the guide, see Europe on board the vodka tram or crammed into a 2CV.
APPY HUNTING
40
Looking for a new pad? We check out the best house-hunting apps on the market.
A TURKISH PATRONAGE
72
Making the trip to Gallipoli for Anzac Day, and our guide to the best of Turkey.
66 TNTMAGAZINE.COM
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EDITORIAL Editor Carol Driver Sub editor Jahn Vannisselroy Content editors: Acting Travel Laura Chubb Entertainment Alasdair Morton News & sport Tom Sturrock Web Oliver Jones Staff writer Clare Vooght Staff writer/editorial assistant Rebecca Kent
LONDONDIARY
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DESIGN AND PRODUCTION Head of design and production Jon Cooke Graphic design manager Justine Mackay Acting picture researcher Ruth Board DIGITAL & IT Head of digital marketing and development Syed Ahmad Social Media Coordinator Dan Thorne IT manager Stephen Dann SALES Commercial director David Alstin Sales manager Jaqui Ward Classified Ad Manager Matt Syder Sales executives Tyler Harrison | Eddie Clinton | Donovan Smith | Michael Fair Sales administrator Abby Nightingale MARKETING & EVENTS Marketing and events assistant Phoebe Cherrill ACCOUNTS Margaret Roberts | Suzanne Welsh TNT MULTIMEDIA LTD CEO Kevin Ellis Chairman Ken Hurst PUBLISHER TNT Multimedia Limited DISTRIBUTION Emblem Direct Ltd PRINTED BY Wyndeham Peterborough Limited NEWS AAP SAPA NZPA PICTURES Getty Images, TNT Images, Thinkstock TNT Magazine , 16 Brune St, London, E1 7NJ tntmagazine.com General enquiries Phone 020 7953 8469 Fax 020 7953 7957 Email enquiries@tntmagazine.com
Shhh... SECRET LONDON CIRCUSFEST 2012 THE ROUNDHOUSE
Over the next five weeks, The Roundhouse hosts contemporary circus acts from all over the world. It’s a genre that has come a long way from bearded ladies and dancing bears, with a more varied, innovative selection than you might imagine. There’s still the high-energy acrobatics of Guinean troupe Cirque Mandingue, but they now share a programme with Swedish trio Undermän, whose act riffs on the experiences of its three male members, abandoned by their performing partners, who were also their girlfriends. £20
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Mar 28-Apr 29 Roundhouse, Chalk Farm Road, NW1 8EH
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BRAINS
DRESSING BOOK CLUB BLUES LONDON
SUBSCRIPTIONS AND DISTRIBUTION Caroline Penn 01603 559004
When people started studying the human brain back in the 16th century, there were all kinds of outlandish theories about how it worked. Although many of those crackpot ideas have been dismissed, there’s still plenty of mystery. At this exhibition, you can see some brains on display as well as some nasty-looking instruments.
If you haven’t paid a visit to the Book Club, just round the corner from Shoreditch High Street, then this is the perfect excuse – a night when you learn some moves for the blues and then bust them out once the live music starts. If that wasn’t enough to get you on board, the Book Club also has a ping pong table. Winner.
The Horniman is one of London’s most offbeat museums, with its bizarre collections of esoterica, ensuring its take on the changing face of London style will be fascinating. It’s an exhibition that examines the way everything from immigration to popular films have inspired Londoners to reinvent themselves.
Mar 29-Jun 17, 10am Wellcome Collection, 183 Euston Road, NW1 2BE Euston wellcomecollection.org
Sun, Apr 1, 6.45pm The Book Club, 100 Leonard Street, EC2A 4RH Old Street wearetbc.com
Until Jan 2, 2013, 10.30am Horniman Museum, 100 London Road, SE23 3PQ Forest Hill horniman.ac.uk
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Nearly as good as the real thing
OLYMPIC GOLD CHALLENGE EVENT Olympic Stadium
It’s the first official test event to be held in the Olympic Stadium, taking in a range of track and field events involving athletes and celebrities alike. The sport might not reach the fever-pitch intensity we can expect later in the year but it’s still a great chance to see the new stadium at its shiny best. If you’ve missed out on securing tickets for the Olympics, this might be as close as you get. £12
Sun, Apr 1, noon Olympic Park, E20 2ST
Hackney Wick
BRITISH DESIGN 1948-2012
CHOCOLATE FESTIVAL
Brits might have an unfashionable reputation in some parts of the world but, over the course of the 20th century, they designed some stuff that only gets better with age. This exhibition will be dripping with nostalgia for Jaguar sportscars, Mary Quaint minidresses and, in between, a host of designs that changed the world.
Indulge your sweet tooth at this pre-Easter nirvana for chocaholics. If you’re a bit sick of buying plain old milk chocolates, then keep an eye out for some of the freaky new combinations, like rhubarb and rose or juniper and lemon, the world’s chocolatiers are coming up with. Beats a Snickers any day.
Mar 31-Aug 12, 10am V&A Museum, Cromwell Road, SW7 2RL South Kensington vam.ac.uk
Mar 30-Apr 1, 11am Southbank Centre Belvedere Road, SE1 8XX Waterloo festivalchocolate.co.uk
£12
Photos: Mats Backer
goldchallenge.org
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LONDONNEWS CHEAP ROOMS ON SALE FOR OLYMPICS
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Campaign: Johnson outside City Hall
A new London hotel is offering rooms for only £9 a night during this summer’s Olympic Games. Tune, set to open in Paddington on June 4, will offer the bargain-bucket rate for guests in the capital until February 2013. It will be the third hotel the pioneering group opens in London, and is set to boast 137 en-suite bedrooms. Guests will use a ‘pay as you go’ system which covers the price of the room – paying for extras on top. Tune Paddington will be a stone’s throw from Edgware Road Underground.
It’s very recognisable still, I’ve represented all the parts of GB Stella McCartney defends her design for the new Team GB Olympics kit after criticism it was “too blue”
70-DAY 2012 TORCH ROUTE UNVEILED The Olympic Torch Rally street route has been revealed, with it scheduled to arrive in London on July 21. The first stretch in the capital, on day 64 of the 70-day rally, is between Greenwich and Waltham Forest. It then heads to east London, then Lewisham and Bromley, before getting to Westminster. It will then travel from Hampton Court to the Olympic Park to light the cauldron at the opening ceremony. For the full route see london2012.com
ON THE TUBE
Let the Games begin
Boris takes the lead as race for London mayor gets under way The race for London mayor kicked off in earnest last week, with Boris Johnson and Ken Livingstone going head-to-head over issues affecting the capital. Tory Johnson started the week on a bad note, after being accused of fudging crime statistics on his campaign website. It states that during his term as mayor, robbery rates had fallen 16 per cent. However, independent research shows the figure has actually risen by 18.8 per cent. The blond incumbent also found himself under fire on Tuesday, which marked the beginning of the formal election period, for “abusing public resources”. It came after his re-election team changed the official City Hall Twitter account handle from @MayorofLondon
to @BorisJohnson, gaining him 253,144 supporters. It was quickly changed back. Livingstone also found himself in the headlines for the wrong reasons, after he was embroiled in a race row. The former London mayor allegedly claimed rich Jews would never vote for him. But Livingstone has denied making the comment. While campaigning on Friday, the 66-year-old said he will “declare independence” for London if he’s reelected, wanting to take control of the capital’s NHS, housing and benefits system. “I’m in favour of devolving everything,” he added. Johnson’s week ended on a better note than it started, with an eight-point poll lead over his Labour rival. The mayoral election will take place on May 3.
THIS WEEK IN LONDON...
Oxford Street: to get busier
THIS WEEK’S CLOSURES
DISTRICT: No weekend service between Turnham Green and Ealing Broadway.
JUBILEE: No Sunday service between North Greenwich and Stratford ‘til 10am. METROPOLITAN: No weekend service between Harrow-on-the-Hill, Croxley and Rickmansworth. Shuttle train services operate between Watford, Amersham and Chesham. Rail replacement buses operate.
VICTORIA: Closed all weekend.
6
Photos: Getty
PICCADILLY: No Sunday service between Acton Town and Uxbridge. Trains serve Turnham Green. Buses operate.
Emergency legislation to lift the six-hour shopping limit on opening hours during the Olympics is being rushed through parliament. Despite opposition from Labour, church leaders and unions, chancellor George Osborne is pressing ahead with the move. It will mean stores can open for longer over eight weekends in July, August and September. “We have got the whole world coming to London and the rest of the country for the Olympics,” he said. “It would be a great shame, particularly when some of the events are on a Sunday, if the country had a ‘closed for business’ sign on it.” He also indicated the rules could be relaxed in the future, saying “at the moment” the plans are temporary.
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Chill out: in Pip’s barn
F
A good roasting The traditional Sunday lunch is a British institution. A hungover weekend just isn’t the same without it. Here’s where to get yours WORDS CAROL DRIVER
If there is one meal the Brits have mastered, it’s the Sunday roast. The Italians may have conquered pasta, India has the monopoly on curry, and Mexico does a mean enchilada. But when it comes to crispy potatoes, succulent meat, Yorkshire puds, all swamped in thick, juicy gravy, Britannia still rules the waves. However, a decent roast doesn’t have to mean sweating it out in a bustling carvery, queuing for all-youcan-eat portions of soggy meat. There are more intriguing venues springing up in London, each bringing a new twist to the UK’s traditional meal. One such place is Pip’s Dish, a charming converted barn off Upper Street in Islington, which doubles as a small farmers’ market and pop-up restaurant, where food blogger and chef Philip Dundas whips up a treat. On Sundays, up to 30 guests tuck into a three-course medley, listening to acoustic music while sitting on hay bales in what was a run-down, disused Citroen garage. When we arrive to taste the goods on offer, my friends and I are treated to
a delicious starter of crab and salmon broth, followed by roast Hereford topside, with a Yorskhire pudding, horseradish chard, golden nugget squash, sesame kale, and some of the best roast potatoes I’ve ever tasted (sorry mum!). There’s also a chunky serving of nut roast which goes down a treat with the veggies. As Dundas says, part of what makes Sunday lunch so enjoyable is the experience of friends and family together. “It’s an occasion that on a weekly basis nearly takes us back to the ‘family eating round the table together’ nostalgia,” he explains. “You can have the young adults eating off their Saturday night hangovers sitting with grandparents. There’s no separation. It’s the closest thing to a religious gathering. “For what we do at Pip’s, there’s no hard and fast rule – we focus on what produce is available right now, and high-quality, sustainable ingredients. “What was also important with the barn was narrowing the gap between people and food – they can see it from its raw state, to being cooked, and then
buy the ingredients after.” And it’s a concept that works extremely well. However, if you’re a bit of a culinary whizz and fancy your chances whipping up the perfect roast, according to executive chef, Andy Owens, it’s all about the meat. Owens, who works at The Individual Restaurant Company, which has three venues serving Sunday lunch in London, says: “Preparing a roast should be enjoyed just as much as eating it. “The meat is the star of the plate. Get to know your local butcher, he will offer you the best advice on choosing a cut. Let your meat come to room temperature before roasting, and remember seasoning – use good quality sea salt and cracked black pepper. “And for extra moreish roast potatoes, try roasting with duck fat.” If that fails, there are plenty of restaurants willing to cook for you – turn the page for our picks.
T
TOP PLACES FOR SUNDAY LUNCH ›› Sunday lunch at Pip’s Dish £25pp for three courses The Barn, 133B Upper Street, Essex Road pipsdish.co.uk N1 1QP
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*Terms & Conditions apply. Flights not included. Egypt trip price includes local payment based on $1 = £0.63, which must be paid locally in USD. Morocco local payment must be paid locally in GBP. Exchange rates correct at time of printing, and subject to currency fluctuations, depending when payment is made. Discount taken from the trip price and doesn’t include local payments. Subject to availability.
1491 LONDON listings.indd 9
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HAWKSMOOR SEVEN DIALS
THE CROOKED WELL CAMBERWELL
Having scooped the title of ‘Best Sunday Lunch In The UK’ from the Observer Food Monthly, roasts don’t come any more highly recommended than this. Kick off with a Bloody Mary before delving into a tasty rump of longhorn beef with all the trimmings. Expect crisp duck fat roast potatoes, Yorkshire puds “the size of dustbin lids” and lashings of bone marrow and onion gravy. Situated at the site of the old Watney-Combe brewery, the venue itself is worth a visit, with chemistry lab-top bar tables, original vaulted brick ceilings and tiles sourced from London Underground.
Fancy a bit of celebspotting as you tuck in to your roast? Head to The Crooked Well where Erin O’Connor and Florence Welch frequent. Decked out like a fancy home, this new venue boasts a comfortable, rustic charm. For Sunday lunch, choose from beef, pork or a whole chicken served with stuffing, pigs in blankets, roast pots and veg. And if you don’t manage to polish off every morsel, the kitchen will pack it up for you to eat at home.
£19.50
Sundays, 12pm-4.30pm 11 Langley Street, WC2H 9JG Covent Garden thehawksmoor.com
£28.50
THE DRIVER KING’S CROSS Spilling over five floors, with a different theme on each, including an elegant roof terrace, this boutique gastropub has something for everyone. Head downstairs for a lively atmosphere and comfy seating for Sunday lunch, before making your way to the second floor for top DJs. £14.50+
Sundays all day Wharfedale Road, N1 9RY King’s Cross driverlondon.co.uk
THE OWL AND THE PUSSYCAT SHOREDITCH
THE JOLLY BUTCHERS STOKE NEWINGTON
This understated pub serves firstclass food, with a delicate twist on the Sunday lunch. Try the braised feather blade of beef, roasted root vegetables with lashings of horseradish mash. Or there’s pan roasted hake, herb crushed potatoes with mushy peas and cockles.
With its red exterior, you can’t miss this no-airs-or-graces, oldfashioned pub. It’s busy, so try to grab a table early, then enjoy sizable portions of chicken, ribeye, lamb, pork loin or nut roast served with homemade Yorkshires, potatoes, parsnips and a decent helping of gravy.
Sundays, 12pm-6pm 34 Redchurch Street, E2 7DP Shoreditch High Street owlandpussycatshoreditch.com
Sundays until 10pm 204 Stoke Newington High St, Stoke Newington N16 7HU jollybutchers.co.uk
THE GARDEN GATE HAMPSTEAD
THE ALMA ISLINGTON
The cracking beer garden is a huge draw at this bright and breezy local. There are classy options for Sunday lunch, including skin-on potatoes and regionally sourced meat.
Veggies get a special option of mushroom and cashew nut wellington for Sunday lunch at this casual pub, which also sells tonnes of Kiwi products at its New Zealand Tuck Shop.
This popular Chelsea landmark is just off Fulham Road, so you’ll spot more than a few football fans either celebrating or drowning their sorrows after a big match. With a huge seated pavement terrace (it’s heated), you can enjoy a traditional Sunday lunch while soaking up the sun or watching the big sporting events over a couple of decent pints.
Sundays all day 14 South End Road, NW3 2QE Belsize Park thegardengatehampstead.co.uk
Sunday, 12.30pm-4pm & 6.30pm9.30pm 59 Newington Green Road, N1 4QU Canonbury thealma-n1.co.uk
Sundays from midday 6 Camera Place, SW10 0BH West Brompton thesportingpagechelsea.co.uk
£10.50+
HOUSEBITES YOUR PLACE Fancy having chefs prepare a meal for you, then delivering it to your pad so you can pass it off as your own? Your roast meat with all the trimmings – including cauliflower cheese – could be cooked by someone who has worked at The Ivy, Jamie Oliver’s Fifteen, or they could be a MasterChef finalist or just a really good cook. Either way, you win brownie points for pulling off a top lunch. £9.25
Order seven days in advance housebites.com
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Sundays, 12.30pm-2.30pm & 6.30pm-10.30pm 16 Grove Lane, SE5 8SY Denmark Hill thecrookedwell.com
£10+
£10.50+
£9.95+
THE SPORTING PAGE CHELSEA £10.50+
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TRULLO ISLINGTON
DRAKE & MORGAN VARIOUS
If you’re a bit of a heathen and fancy something other than roast for Sunday lunch, head to this contemporary Italian restaurant. Feast on four courses, which change weekly but have included delights such as tagliarini with brown shrimp, yellow and green courgette and chilli; fresh almond and parsley salad; mackerel with farro pilaf; and beef onglet with rainbow chard and horseradish. The wine list is pretty darn impressive, too.
Take the edge off your hangover with a free Bloody Mary when you book for Sunday lunch at this chain’s four venues. Choose from the Refinery on Bankside, the Parlour in Canary Wharf, The Folly in the City or the Drift on Bishopsgate – then decide on your roast. There’s the slab of British beef with creamed horseradish; a whole free-range chicken with lemon and thyme served with bread sauce and crispy bacon; or tender pork belly with crackling, Bramley apple sauce and gravy. All meats are served with veg and fluffy-in-the-middle beef-dripping roast potatoes which claim to be nearly as good as your mum’s.
£30
£12.95
ROAST LONDON BRIDGE This might be a bit more pricey than your average Sunday tucker, but with a name like Roast, you can expect your meat and trimmings to be spot-on. Celebrating all-things British, the venue sources much of its produce from nearby Borough Market, championing local farmers. £19.75+
Sundays, 12.30pm-3pm 300 Saint Paul’s Road, N1 2LH Highbury & Islington trullorestaurant.com
Sundays, 12pm-9pm The Floral Hall, Stoney Street, SE1 1TL London Bridge roast-restaurant.com
HIDEAWAY JAZZ CAFE STREATHAM
THE CRABTREE HAMMERSMITH
Tuck in to top nosh while kicking back and listening to the sounds of jazz, swing, soul and blues. With splashes of bright orange, comfy cream sofas and a piano, this new venue (left) is putting a modern twist on Sunday lunch. Diners can choose from chicken, pork, beef or veggie roast with the usual trimmings, followed by a delicious calorific dessert.
With top views of the Thames, this is a great place to head to for lazy summer afternoons. Choose from lounging in the beer garden or reclining on the riverside terrace while tucking into a mouthwatering menu and supping a Real Ale. Up for grabs is Kilracock pork belly; Scotch beef sirloin; or lemon & thyme chicken breast with all the trimmings.
All day Sunday 227 Streatham High Road, Streatham SW16 2ED hideawaylive.co.uk
Sundays, midday-9pm Rainville Road, W6 9HA Hammersmith thecrabtreew6.co.uk
TAPPING THE ADMIRAL CAMDEN
THE FALCON CLAPHAM
This super-cosy pub is full of friendly locals. Head here for topnotch roast chicken, pork or nut roast for a bargain price.
This bright-yellow favourite has been refurbished. Check out its new look over Sunday lunch and a read of the papers.
The clue’s in the title as to what this pub once operated as. Now, it’s well known for serving top food in a magnificent venue with a friendly atmosphere. It’s perfect for Sunday lunch. As well as a choice of beef, chicken, port and lamb, there’s a leek & stilton filo parcel served with all the trimmings for the veggies. Finish off with a classic such as Eton mess or banana egg custard.
Sundays from 12.30pm 77 Castle Road, NW1 8SU Chalk Farm tappingtheadmiral.co.uk
Sundays from 12pm 33 Bedford Road, SW4 7SQ Clapham North thefalconclapham.co.uk
Sunday from 12pm 1-3 Crouch Hill, N4 4AP Crouch Hill theolddairyn4.co.uk
£11+
THE SHIP WANSWORTH If you like your meat a little more chargrilled, The Ship fires up its outdoor kitchen whenever the sun comes out. It’s famed for hearty meals and has built a renowned reputation since it first opened its doors as Thameside Waterman’s Inn in 1786. Dine on delights such as grilled sea bream or a rack of ribs, outside overlooking the river. Or grab a table inside to enjoy a more traditional take on Sunday lunch. £7+
Sunday, 12pm-5pm & 7pm-10pm 41 Jew’s Row, SW18 1TB Wandsworth Town theship.co.uk
Sundays from 12pm Various drakeandmorgan.co.uk
£10
£14+
£10+
THE OLD DAIRY FINSBURY PARK £12.50+
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JUAN ZELADA SINGER SONGWRITER
*excludes Game
MYLONDON
EASTER OFFER
What baffles me about London is the British etiquette on the busy Underground. People really just want to shout and scream at the tourists who are getting in the way, but they always maintain this lovely British politeness.
Buy £30 of Drywors and get ½ KG FREE*
When I want to chill out I grab a cold beer down by Hammersmith Bridge, right by the river. When the sun is shining it’s really beautiful around there. The most interesting people I’ve met in London are pub landlords – they have such interesting stories, especially at The Camel in Bethnal Green. Sadly they are a dying breed but it’s always great when you stumble across one in an old East End pub. My favourite places for a drink are The Camel, The Carpenter’s Arms and The Dove in east London, and The Sun Inn and The Salisbury in west London – they are all top, traditional pubs!
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For when you’re hungover in London, the classic Sunday roast and a Guinness always seem to do the trick. And, of course, getting drunk again on the old hair of the dog gets rid of the hangover straight away, or at least delays the inevitable. What’s the first thing you think of in the morning? Where did I leave my guitar? That’s a common one, especially after a show! Or I’ll be trying to remember a lyric that was in my head when I went to bed. What gets me up in the morning? My dog licking my face acts as a pretty good alarm clock! You can’t switch it off so after a while the slobbery licking gets too much and you have to get up.
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tes Great ra fees en bank No hidd sactions an tr er s Fast e system use onlin pliant Easy to lly com re and fu cu se , Safe service er om led cust Unrival
My perfect weekend would include fun, family, cold beers and an impromptu music jam session. Getting out of the city for a couple of days is always good for the soul. The last naughty thing I did was a drunken emergency toilet break by a bus stop bin one night (with the angry bus driver’s face in the distance!). Five words that sum up London ... Vibrant, unpredictable, diverse, (sometimes) painful and (charmingly) arrogant.
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juanzelada.com / Juan plays Bush Hall, W12 7LJ on March 30 12
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Rebirth: the Wheatsheaf
BAR THE SCENE Formerly a grubbed-out den of a pub, this was a ‘locals only’ boozer, and even then it was fairly empty. A swift makeover has seen its fortunes reversed as out went the spit n’ sawdust and in came mood-inducing lighting, double, four- and six-person tables packed in to give some real atmosphere, and a back area reinvigorated into a dining room celebrating the building’s Victorian origins. With an element of style, assorted furniture maintains an improv vibe, and they’ve also kicked things into gear in terms of the entertainment, which boasts regular weekend DJs and comedy shows (Ardal O’Hanlon and Andy Parsons recently, with Micky Flanagan on April 25 doing a 90min set). THE GRUB Regular pub grub – but carried off with panache and not likely to bust the bank either. Sausage rolls and scotch eggs as snacks, mains include Cumberland sausage ring, Welsh black rump steak, and homemade beefburgers. BEHIND THE BAR Old and new world wines jostle for position, with a generous range of ales (Harvey’s Sussex, Purity Ubu, Sharpe’s Doom Bar along with a guest ale) and your standard breed of lagers (Carling, Amstel, Kronenbourg). BILL PLEASE Pints £3.60; wine from £12.95 by the bottle; snacks from £1.50; mains from £7; and Sunday roasts from £9. VERDICT Perfect for a post-work pint ‘n’ bite, or weekend visit. ALASDAIR MORTON
2 Upper Tooting Road, SW17 7PG
3 OF THE BEST GAME DELIGHTS
wheatsheaftootingbec.com
Tooting Bec
EL PIRATA DE TAPAS
THE ROOKERY
THE FOUNDRY
This Westbourne Park eatery features a tapas dish of wood pigeon, fig puree & red wine jus among a host of other innovative Spanish tastes. Here, traditional gets a modern twist, priced at £7.
A modish dish of confit duck, red cabbage, celeriac and chestnuts leaps out from the brief menu at this speakeasystyle bar and diner, which overlooks leafy Clapham Common. From £13.50.
The menu is fusion British and Sicilian, reflected tantalisingly in a dish of fresh pappardelle with braised venison ragu and Nero D’Avola. It’s amazing stuff, for £14.
elpiratadetapas.co.uk
therookeryclapham.co.uk
forgevenue.org
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BITE SIZE
Viet Grill: a touch of class
POP-UP TAKES FLIGHT If you shudder at the thought of plane food, a new restaurant in Shoreditch might change your mind. British Airways will be opening a pop-up called Flight BA2012, inside a cabin, for two weeks. The restaurant/art gallery/cinema will showcase the best in British talent, including a menu inspired by 1948 – the last time London held the Olympics. A threecourse meal with champagne costs £50. Tickets are on sale now, via BA’s Facebook page, for April 4-17. facebook.com/britishairways
DRINK TO THE BLUES If you like to sip whisky to the wheeze of a harmonica, try the new cocktail from the Blues Kitchen in Camden. Blues Baptism is a concoction of sherry, orange peel, Sazerac rye whisky and cherry bitters. Its creation was inspired by the ritual of blues harmonica players, who used to soak their ‘harps’ in whisky to swell the wooden bodies, making them more airtight for louder, faster playing. The cocktail, priced at £15, comes garnished with a harmonica, so punters can play a tune themselves. theblueskitchen.com
FREE FROZEN YOGHURT FRAE, the frozen yoghurt outlet taking over London, is offering TNT readers a free small frozen yoghurt when they produce this issue at its stores at Boxpark, Shoreditch or Islington on Tuesday, March 27. FRAE Frozen yoghurt is 100 per cent fat free, but if your waistline is of no concern, pile on lashings of salted caramel or blueberries and white chocolate chips. frae.co.uk
VIET GRILL VIETNAMESE THE SCENE This stretch of Kingsland Road is known as Little Saigon because of the dozens of Vietnamese restaurants bunched together. Some of the basic canteens do perfectly adequate, traditional Vietnamese fare but Viet Grill stands out for its slightly slicker operation, with a polished cocktail bar, long, downlit tables dividing the room down the middle, and smaller, contained booths lining the walls. It’s got a touch of class without becoming cold or inaccessible. THE GRUB A shrewd diner knows the selection of sides and salads can contain several highlights and that’s certainly true here. If seafood’s your thing, try the chilli salt and pepper squid, softshell crab or grilled calamari seasoned with lemongrass and okra. Or you can split the sliced rib-eye, which cooks at your table and is served with kimchi, vermicelli and rice paper wraps. Don’t ignore the salads, though – the green papaya with cured beef is a winner, as is the lotus stem salad with shrimp. Viet Grill has a mouth-watering array of meat and fish mains but it’s hard to go Vietnamese without ordering a pho – the traditional noodle soup. This place does the simple things well – the broth is exquisitely flavoured – but offers some snazzy variations on the classic.
There’s a refreshing selection of pre-prandials, including the Viettini, – a mixture of gin and lychee – while guys will gravitate toward the Asian beers (from £3.70). There’s a limited range of cocktail staples (from £6.50) and European wines (from £4.50 a glass). Try the punch (from £14) if you’re in the mood to party. BILL PLEASE Starters and salads from £6; mains from £8; desserts from £3. VERDICT In a crowded strip, Viet Grill is a clear winner, thanks to its innovative riffs on Vietnamese classics and by delivering fare that explodes with freshness and flavour, which is, ultimately, the litmus test for food from this part of the world. If you’ve been looking for top-notch Vietnamese, the search is over. TOM STURROCK BEHIND THE BAR
58 Kingsland Road, E2 8DP
vietnamesekitchen.co.uk/vietgrill
Hoxton
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so sick of standing on the tube beside elderly or pregnant ppl while kids sit there laughing. What ever happend to manners? Aimee Steel the trouble with political jokes is they usually get elected.
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Three of my girlfriends an I did a road trip in Ireland, finishing up in Dublin for St Paddy’s Day. We went out in Galway for cocktails. I decided to get out my camera – little did I know what I would be capturing! Chelsea leant over a candle and her hair went up in flames! This photo captures Jenna (on the opposite side) realising Chelsea’s hair is on fire, whilst Chels is completely oblivious! Hope you get a laugh!, Anna Jenson, via email
NO-BOOZE FOOTIE? NO PROBLEM It’s ridiculous that fans are threatening to boycott Qatar World Cup unless they can drink. You don’t need beer to enjoy football. If this is a problem, stay at home and watch it on TV. When you arrive in Qatar, you’ll quickly notice that they replace drinking culture with much more, and you can embrace a new way of enjoying football – isn’t that what the game is all about, how it’s enjoyed differently internationally? Dave Brett, via Facebook
FOR SAME-SEX MARRIAGE ... I couldn’t agree more with your comment, “The ban on same-sex marriages is discriminatory, staggeringly outdated and, quite frankly, embarrassing”. I’m pro gay marriage! Alex Critoph, via email
AND AGAINST
sex marriages highly distasteful (TNT Our View 1490). Freedom of speech, choice and association are also human rights, which means that the Cornwall Christian couple have a perfect right to refuse a room to a gay couple or anyone else. Why did these gays want to go where they obviously weren’t wanted? Minorities have gone from being victims to being victimisers. Mark Taha, Westminster
CRAP SEX TAPE [On the Tulisa sex tape] That was six minutes and 36 seconds of my life I won’t get back again. Only after viewing it did I realise I am still at work where anybody can see me! And, to summarise, she was crap! Clint Heine, via Facebook
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Jessie J and Albert together for charity
festival
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FIELD DAY
TEENAGE CANCER TRUST SHOWS The Royal Albert Hall, Kensington Gore, SW7 2AP MARCH 28-APRIL 3 | DOORS 7PM | £25
June 2. Victoria Park, E3 5SN. £45 Mile End fielddayfestivals.com
Celebrating its fifth birthday this year, Field Day continues to bring the hippest acts to leafy a park in London. This year’s event features Django Django, Friends, Gold Panda, Com Truise, Errors, Spector, SBTRKT, Sleigh Bells, Franz Ferdinand, Metronomy and The Vaccines, to name but a few of bands, as well as DJ sets from Huw Stephens, Justin Spear and Modeselektor headlining the Bugged Out! stage too.
Now heading in to its 12th year, this week-long run of charity-supporting sees former The Who-man and TCT music-guru Roger Daltrey pull together one of the best line-ups the event’s had in ages, with all manner of acts and bands – rap, pop, old man shuffle-rock (sorry Daltrey), indie champs, resurrected, reunionenjoying titans and stands ups, too. There’s something for everyone. Things kick off on Wednesday evening with Daltrey himself joined by Paul Weller and Kelly Jones from the Stereophonics, for a set sure to take in hits from the threesome’s back catalogues, before Paul McCartney takes to the Royal Albert Hall stage on Thursday. The Who, The Jam and The Beatles in 24 hours, now that is a show that takes some beating. But it’s a challenge Daltrey has taken in his stride. Experience gives way to youth on Friday, as rapper Example brings a touch of contemporary passion, with support from Dagenham grime-star Devlin and synth-sampling popsters Fenech Soler, and Jessie J set to storm the stage with her pop-show-spectacle on Sunday. Saturday night belongs to Britpop gods Pulp who continue to show why they were one of the highpoints of the Nineties indie scene after reforming last year and playing a handful of fest shows. Monday sees the funny folk take over, with Jason Manford hosting an evening of comedy that includes Tim Minchin and Jimmy Carrr, before indie boy/ girl duo Big Deal support Florence + the Machine to bring things to a climactic close on the Tuesday. Like we said, one of the best line-ups in years. South Kensington
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ODD FUTURE (WOLF GANG KILL THEM ALL)
NEW BAND
GIG THURS, MAR 29. 7PM £19.25
This impossibly hyped New York teen rap troupe, featuring lead vocalist Tyler the Creator (right), who infamously threatened – in song – to stab Bruno Mars in the neck, play their biggest UK show to date. Check out what the fuss is all about and see for yourselves whether they can live up to the snotty obnoxiousness they exude. Brixton Academy 211 Stockwell Road, SW9 9SL Brixton o2academybrixton.co.uk
THE BIG CHILL PRESENTS...
FEELING GLOOMY – PULP SPECIAL
CLUB
CLUB
SAT, MAR 31. 9PM-4AM Free
SAT, MAR 31. 10.30PM-3.30AM £6
The house party vibes at this north London bash are free, so there’s no excuse not to get in on the action. Funky breaks and beats label Bomb Strikes take over the Big Chill House for the night with Featurecast headlining and UK-based blog Life Support Machine running the upstairs with Diverted, Mr No Hands and Damn Horns, too.
After their show at the Royal Albert Hall, you can soak up even more Pulp-ness with this one-off retro-special, spinning classic Pulp tunes, and featuring a Jarvis Cocker dance comp. Get your skinny ties and thick-framed glasses out, it’s going to be 1995 all over again, only, you know, for a different class.
The Big Chill House King’s Cross, N1 9NL King’s Cross bigchill.net/house
Islington Academy 16 Parkfield Street, N1 0PS Angel feelinggloomy.com
THE DIAMOND NOISE THE BUZZ SO FAR Unreconstructed rock ‘n’ roll, featuring new wave post punk-y vocals, thundering barrel drums and a catchy chorus that doesn’t shy away from the odd ‘ba-ba-ba’ backing vocal, Londonbased The Diamond Noise’s debut single Never Say Never Say Never is an instantly infectious rabblerousing slice of poppy-punk fun. They have steadily grown their fanbase over the last two years, chiefly through riotous live shows. THE CRITICS SAY “A catchy pop-punk tune” somekindofawesome.com THE PLUG Debut single Never Say Never Say Never is out Apr 2. They play 229 Club, Mar 29. £6
Photos: Getty
W1W 5PN Warren Street 229thevenue.com
BRETON
FACT LDN
BOWLING FOR SOUP
GIG
CLUB
GIG
WEDS, MAR 28. 6PM £7.50
SAT, MAR 31. 10PM £13
SUN, APR 1. 7PM £34.50
Impressively pretentious collective Breton – named after king surrealist Andre Breton – are a group of filmmakers who turned musicians to soundtrack their work (debut LP Other People’s Problems is out Mar 23). Jarring, unpredictable, and deliciously good fun, expect the unexpected from their audio-visual experimentation.
Spanish legends FACT hit London with Timo Mass (above) for their second showcase house and techno event along with amnesia resident Mar-T and FACT residents DJ Herr and Jordi Angulo. Room 2 sees Kevin Griffiths, Basic’s Jon Woodal and more, Lee Gardner and Grant B hit room 3 with some surprises in store, too.
Their 2004 breakout hit Girl All The Bad Guys Want was dumb-skate-rock perfection and saw the band even pick up a Grammy nomination. They’ve continued to churn out this upbeat, catchy, cheeky pop-punk since, but hit these shoes with an acoustic show here in support of last year’s eleventh LP Fishin’ for Woos.
Corsica Studios Unit 5 Farrell Court, Elephant Rd, SE17 1LB Elephant & Castle corsicastudios.com
Egg 200 York Way, N7 9AP King’s Cross egglondon.net
Koko 1a Camden High St, NW1 7JE Mornington Crescent koko.uk.com
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CLUBLISTINGS
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MONDAY 26 Cuban Hideaway DJ Rich plays Latin, house, funk and R‘n’B. The Hideaway, Stanthorpe Rd, SW16 2ED (020 8835 7070). 9.40pm-late. £7.
Xxtra Terry-James Lynch hosts a night of house, electro and pop, plus fashion. The Shadow Lounge, Brewer St, W1F 0RF (020 7287 7988). 10pm-3am. £5, free before 11pm.
BOOK NOW!
Yoyo DJs Seb Chew, Leo Greenslade and Toddla T spin hip-hop, dubstep, garage and grime, plus live performances from Yadi and Smiler. Notting Hill Arts Club, Notting Hill Gate, W11 3JQ (020 7460 4459). 7pm-2am. £7, adv £5.
Hard Core Salsa DJ Mario plays mambo and salsa, plus dance lessons. Salsa!, Charing Cross Rd, WC2H 0JG (020 7379 3277). 7pm-late. £4, free before 9pm. I Love Mondays DJ Victor spins commercial dance, disco, R‘n’B and funky house. Moonlighting, Greek St, W1D 4DR (020 7437 5782/ cc 020 7287 3727). 10pm-3.30am. £5, w/flyer £3, NUS £1.50. March Of The Spring Hares Ollie Russian and Clublad DJs spin indie and pop, plus Hares, Moulettes and Beans On Toast perform live. Notting Hill Arts Club, Notting Hill Gate, W11 3JQ (020 7460 4459). 7pm-late. £5, free before 8pm. Popcorn Jonesey, Harvey Adam, Jamie Hammond and Terry T-Rex provide dance, electro, R‘n’B, pop and hip-hop. Heaven, Charing Cross Arches, Villiers St, WC2N 6NG (020 7930 2020). 11pm-5.30am. £8. Rehab DJ Haley, Zoe Demonette, Dan Udy and Malarky supply indie, electro and pop. The Roxy, Rathbone Place, W1T 1HJ (020 7255 1098). 10pm-3am. £5, NUS/ w/flyer £3, mems £1 before 10.30pm. Service Industry Night DJ Colin Russell and Donald Sweeneey spin R‘n’B, hip-hop and chart. Rumba, Shaftesbury Ave, W1D 7EP (020 7287 2715). 9pm3am. £10, free before 11pm. Tins On Toast Indie, pop and dance from Steve Harris, Ed Wilder from Club NME and Bandangos. The Purple Turtle, Crowndale Rd, NW1 1TN (020 7383 4976). 7pm-late. £5, NUS/w/flyer £3.
TUESDAY 27 Jamm Sandwich Eddie Pillar, Arthur Baker and Lascelle Gordon spin pop, hip-hop, R‘n’B and dance hits. The Purple Turtle, Crowndale Rd, NW1 1TN (020 7383 4976). 6.30pm-late. £5, £3 guestlist. No Quarter DJs Maz and TV Nights play rock, funk and hiphop, plus live performances from David J Alexander, Copacabana Club and Avert Francis. Notting Hill Arts Club, Notting Hill Gate, W11 3JQ (020 7460 4459). 7pm-2am. £8, w/flyer £6.
FRIDAY 30
SPECTRUM Great Suffolk Street Warehouse. Sat, May 5. £20 Chase and Status (above), Sub Focus, Disclosure, Zombie Kids and loads more play this car park-loacted dubstep, bass and garage blast. SE1 0NR
Southwark
spectrum48k.com
WEDNESDAY 28 Cheapskates Old-school hip-hop, electro and disco courtesy of DJ Downfall. Moonlighting, Greek St, W1D 4DR (020 7437 5782/ cc 020 7287 3727). 9pm-3.30am. £6.50, NUS £5.50, w/flyer £4.50. Choke Resident DJs play hip-hop, drum ‘n’ bass, electro, indie and grime. The Roxy, Rathbone Place, W1T 1HJ (020 7255 1098). 10pm-3am. £5, NUS/w/flyer £4, guestlist £3. Dance Nights Princess Karina and DJ Gary Baldi spin dance hits. EC3 Live, Crosswall, EC3N 2JY (020 7488 1766). 11.30pm-3am. £10. Fat Poppa Daddys Resident DJs spin hip-hop, funk, electro, house, dubstep and reggae. One, Leicester Sq, WC2H 7NA (020 7437 0453). 11pm-2am. £5, free before midnight. Madd Raff Wednesdays Klose One and Illaman spin hip-hop, reggae and Jamaican beats. The Social, Little Portland St, W1W 7JD (020 7636 4992). 7pm-1am. £5, free before 9pm, £3 before 11pm. N*A*S*I*N SoniX, Brahim and Punk Gareth play punk, rock, metal and ska. The Borderline, Orange Yard, Manette St, W1D 4JB (0870 060 3777/ cc 0871 231 0842). 11pm-3am. £5, w/flyer £4, NUS £3, mems £2. Roda De Samba DJ Limao spins Latin and house, plus Sergio Loroza and Madureira perform live. Guanabara, Parker St, WC2B 5PW (020 7242 8600). 5pm-late. £5, free before 9pm.
Panic Max Panic, Gaz Panic and That Perfect Fumble spin indie, electro, retro and pop. The Roxy, Rathbone Place, W1T 1HJ (020 7255 1098). 10pm-3am. £5, NUS/w/flyer £3, w/flyer free before 10.30pm.
Swerve DJs Chris Intaface, Nu:Tone and Fabio supply drum ‘n’ bass. Cable, Bermondsey St, SE1 2EG (020 7403 7730). 10pm-3am. £7, £5 before 11pm, NUS £5, £3 before 11pm.
Wale Official Afterparty DJ L spins R‘n’B, funky house and hip-hop, plus Wale performs live. Anaya, Swallow St, W1B 4DE (020 7734 9116). 11pm-4am. £20, £16 queue jump, ladies free before 11pm.
Trannyshack Miss Dusty O, Tasty Tim and Lady Lloyd spin commercial dance and pop. Madame Jojo’s, Brewer St, W1F 0SE (020 7734 3040). 10pm-3am. £5, w/flyer £3, free before midnight.
White Heat DJs Matty, Olly and Marcus spin electro, techno and indie. Madame Jojo’s, Brewer St, W1F 0SE (020 7734 3040). 10.30pm-3am. £5, concs/w/flyer £4.
Work Lee Harris, Niyi Maximus Crown and Big John Freeman spin house, pop and funk. Fire, South Lambeth Rd, SW8 1UQ (020 7582 9890). 11pm-5am. £5, £4 before 1am.
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THURSDAY 29 Bad Sex Mayton DJs spin electro and indie, plus live performances from You And Others Around You and Secret Rivals. Proud Camden, The Horse Hospital, Chalk Farm Rd, NW1 8AH (020 7482 3867). 7.30pm-1.30am. £7, £5 before 10pm. Dead Beat Society Battle DJ Shortee Blitz spins reggae and dancehall. Cargo, Rivington St, EC2A 3AY (020 7739 3440). 7pm-late. £5. Fuel Thursdays DJ Melody Kane spins house, funk, soul and urban beats. One, Leicester Sq, WC2H 7NA (020 7437 0453). 10pm-2am. £10, adv £5. Funk Fiesta Night! DJ Limao spins Latin and house. Guanabara, Parker St, WC2B 5PW (020 7242 8600). 5pm-late. £5, free before 9pm. Latin Krazy DJs spin salsa, bachata and reggaeton, plus salsa dance lessons. Salsa!, Charing Cross Rd, WC2H 0JG (020 7379 3277). 6pm-2am. £4, free before 9pm. Mix And Blend Presents Logansama, Vectra, Dlux and White Powder Gold spin garage, reggae, hip-hop and funky house. The Macbeth, Hoxton St, N1 6LP (020 7749 0600). 7pm-late. £7, £5 before 10.30pm. Old Skool Thursdays Resident DJs supply R‘n’B, dancehall, funky, soca and old skool. Euphoriom, High St, W3 6NG (020 8993 2915). 10pm-late. £5, free before 11pm. QueerlyOut DJ Robby D spins commercial dance, pop and R‘n’B. Escape Bar, Brewer St, W1F 0SU (020 7734 3040). 9pm3am. £5, mems £3, free before 9pm. Radio The Radio DJs play 1980s pop, indie and disco. The Roxy, Rathbone Place, W1T 1HJ (020 7255 1098). 10pm-3am. £5, NUS/w/flyer £3, free before 10pm. Vibe DJs on rotation including Anas, Spider, Ice, Commander B and DJ L spin hip-hop, R‘n’B, bashment and reggae. Moonlighting, Greek St, W1D 4DR (020 7437 5782/ cc 020 7287 3727). 10pm-3am. £7, w/flyer £5 before midnight, ladies £5/free before 11.30pm.
Achei Londres Presents Paullo & Paulino, Junior Garcia, Marco & Giuliano, Wesley Wandir and DJ Thakosta spin house, techno and electro. The Garage, Highbury Corner, N5 1RD (0870 060 3777/ cc 0844 847 1678). 9pm-late. £25. Bedrock DJs Little Chris and George spin indie, electro and pop. The Borderline, Orange Yard, Manette St, W1D 4JB (0870 060 3777/ cc 0871 231 0842). 11pm-4am. £7, w/flyer £5 before midnight. Calentito Pop, R‘n’B, and soul. Salvador And Amanda, Great Newport St, WC2H 7JA (020 7240 1551). 9pm-3am. £10, free before 9pm, guestlist £5. Dance Rocks House, R‘n’B, chart, indie and 1980s and 1990s hits. The Watershed, The Broadway, SW19 1SD (020 8540 0080). 11pm3am. £8, £5 before midnight. Favela Blocparty DJs D.Vyzor and Moishe spin house, funk and Latin, plus Fontanas perform live. Guanabara, Parker St, WC2B 5PW (020 7242 8600). 5pm-late. £10. The Good Foot DJ Snowboy and weekly guests spin funk, soul and retro hits. Madame Jojo’s, Brewer St, W1F 0SE (020 7734 3040). 10pm-3am. £8, mems £5. The Journey Continues DJ Rowan Meadows, DJ George Turner and DJ Fudge spin house and techno. The Whitehouse, Clapham Park Rd, SW4 7EH (020 7498 3388). 9pm-4am. £7, £5 before midnight. Love Hate DJ EZ, Oxide And Neutrino, Sticky, Klose One, Señor Floss, Jamie Muse, Wheela and Short Back And Sides mix garage, electro and techno. Egg, York Way, N7 9AX (020 7871 7111). 10pm-6am. £10, adv £8.
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SATURDAY 31 BBM Me Presents Roy Rovelli and Colin Peters spin electro, pop and dance. The Hoxton Pony, Curtain Rd, EC2A 3AH (020 7613 2844). 8pm-2am. £10, concs £7 before 10pm, free before 9pm. Ear To Ground DVS1, Cosmin TRG, Markus Suckut and Billy Allen spin techno and house in the main room, while Tom Dicicco, Chris Stanford & Dax J, Fabio Mann and Jay Jory play dubstep and electro in room two. Cable, Bermondsey St, SE1 2EG (020 7403 7730). 10pm-6am. £20, adv £12.50, early bird £8. Fabric DJs Sasha and Max Cooper spin house and techno in room one, while Terry Francis, Cari Lekebusch and Joseph Capriati mix tech-house and techno in room two, plus Jan Krueger, Lee Rands and Chris Maran in room three and a live performance from James Teej. Fabric, Charterhouse St, EC1M 6HJ (020 7336 8898). 11pm-8am. £20, adv £24 incl CD, adv £19, NUS £13, £12 after 4am. Lost And Found Keb Darge and Andy Smith play blues, rockabilly, funk and Northern Soul. Madame Jojo’s, Brewer St, W1F 0SE (020 7734 3040). 10pm-3am. £8, mems £5. Obsession Lisa Pin Up, BK, Andy Farley, Phil Reynolds and Dave Curtis and Pick Up and Rise supply hard house. Plus a live set from K90. The Scala, Pentonville Rd, N1 9NL (020 7833 2022/ cc 0844 477 1000). 10pm-6am. £16. RBMA Presents Deep house courtesy of Kerri Chandler, San Soda and Red D. Plan B, Brixton Rd, SW9 7AY (020 7737 7372). 10pm-6am. £14, adv £12. Shake Disco and pop from DJ John Osbourne and Paul C in the main room, while DJ Milo plays party anthems in room two. Electric Ballroom, Camden High St, NW1 8QP (020 7485 9006). 10pm-3am. £10, NUS/mems £8 before 11.30pm. Trouble Vision DJs Theo Parrish, Bicep, Mosca, Hackman, Eliphino, Mr Solid Gold and Park Ranger spin house, disco and garage across two rooms. Corsica Studios, Elephant Rd, SE17 1LB (020 7703 4760). 10pm-6am. £15.
SUNDAY 1
Machine Robert Hood, Ben Sims, Kirk Degiorgio, Paul Mac and Tony Anderson spin funk, house and techno. Corsica Studios, Elephant Rd, SE17 1LB (020 7703 4760). 10pm-6am. £12, adv £10.
Can’t Stop Won’t Stop Mark Radford and Roch-Mix-Hard spin house and techno. Club Aquarium, Old St, EC1V 9DD (020 7251 6136). 11pm-6am. £15, £10 before midnight, ladies free before midnight.
Miami Vibes Oliver “The Spoilt Kid” spins house and Latin. Gigalum, Cavendish Parade, Clapham Common South Side, SW4 9DW (020 8772 0303). 7pm-late. Free.
Forro DJs spin Brazilian, African and indigenous rhythms. Guanabara, Parker St, WC2B 5PW (020 7242 8600). 5pm-late. £5, free before 8pm.
One Kiss DJs Krisis and Melody Kane play chart, R‘n’B, electro and hip-hop. Sound, Leicester Sq, WC2H 7NA (0333 240 1010). 10pm-3am. £10, £5 before 11pm. Simmer John Heckle and Richard Adam spin electro, house and soul, plus Nicholas performs live. The Basing House, Kingsland Rd, E2 8AA (020 7688 0339). 10pm-4am. £5-£12.
Gigalum Sunday Sessions Presents Momentum DJ Alex Kenji spins techhouse. Gigalum, Cavendish Parade, Clapham Common South Side, SW4 9DW (020 8772 0303). 3pm-11pm. Free. Lets Go Crazy Chase & Status (DJ set), Friction, Biometrix and Linguistics spin electro, rock and drum ‘n’ bass. The Coronet, New Kent Rd, SE1 6TJ (020 7701 1500). 9.30pm-5.30pm. £25.
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MONDAY 26 Drake Hip-hop and R‘n’B from the Grammy-nominated Canadian rapper, singer and actor. The O2 Arena, Peninsula Sq, SE10 0DX (0844 856 0202). £37.50 & £39.50.
Reuben Richards, Louise Golbey Blues, funk and soul singer from London. Floridita, Wardour St, W1F 0TN (020 7314 4042). £10-£25.
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The Straits Former members of Dire Straits play rock and blues. IndigO2, Peninsula Sq, SE10 0DX (0871 220 0260). £10-£45.
Gemma Hayes, Boat To Row Indie-pop and rock from the Dublin-based singer-songwriter. The Slaughtered Lamb, Great Sutton St, EC1V 0DX (020 7253 1516). £12.50.
FRIDAY 30
SATURDAY 31 Aswad Classic reggae by the veteran band. Islington Town Hall, Upper St, N1 2UD (020 7527 2000). £22.50 & £27.50. Diabel Cissokho & Ramon Goose World music by the Senegalese griot artist. St Ethelburga’s, Bishopsgate, EC2N 4AG (020 7496 1610). £12, adv £10.
Jakwob Dubstep from the London-based DJ and producer. XOYO, Cowper St, EC2A 4AP (020 7729 5959). £10.
Rosanne Cash Country and country-rock by the American singer-songwriter and daughter of Johnny. Union Chapel, Compton Terrace, N1 2UN (020 7226 1686). £17.50.
The Destroyers, Mavrika The Birmingham-based 15-piece plays frenzied Balkan folk and punk. Rich Mix, Bethnal Green Rd, E1 6LA (020 7613 7498). £14, adv £12.
Kill It Kid The Bath-based band plays delta-blues-inspired rock. The Borderline, Orange Yard, Manette St, W1D 4JB (0870 060 3777/ cc 0871 231 0842). £7.50.
Jack Cheshire Alt and psych folk by the Bath-born singer-songwriter. Kings Place, York Way, N1 9AG (020 7520 1490). £12.50, adv £9.50.
Detroit Soul Soul favourites from the nine-piece. Dover St Restaurant And Bar, Dover St, W1S 4LQ (020 7629 9813). £15, diners free before 11pm.
Pokey LaFarge And The South City Three The St Louis-based guitarist and singer-songwriter leads his country and blues outfit. Bush Hall, Uxbridge Rd, W12 7LJ (020 8222 6955). £13.50. Willy Mason Folk, blues and country from the New Yorkbased singer-songwriter. Hoxton Square Bar And Kitchen, Hoxton Sq, N1 6NU (020 7613 0709). £10. One Jump Ahead Jump jive and swing by the band. Dover St Restaurant And Bar, Dover St, W1S 4LQ (020 7629 9813). £6, free for diners before 10pm. Torches, The New Union Indieelectro by the London-based band. Bull And Gate, Kentish Town Rd, NW5 2TJ (020 7704 0187). £6, w/flyer £5. Wale Hip-hop by the Washingtonbased singer. The Scala, Pentonville Rd, N1 9NL (020 7833 2022/ cc 0844 477 1000). £12.50.
TUESDAY 27 Athena Ska-punk band from Turkey. Bush Hall, Uxbridge Rd, W12 7LJ (020 8222 6955). £15. Emily Barker & The Red Clay Halo The Australian singer-songwriter leads her contemporary folk outfit. Half Moon, Putney, Lower Richmond Rd, SW15 1EU (020 8780 9383). £10. Chimaira, Revoker, Neosis Thrash metal from the Clevelandbased band. O2 Academy Islington, Parkfield St, N1 0PS (020 7288 4400/ cc 0844 477 2000). £16. The Deadly Gentlemen, The Wagon Tales The band from Boston, Massachusetts, plays acoustic folk and bluegrass. The Slaughtered Lamb, Great Sutton St, EC1V 0DX (020 7253 1516). £13, adv £12. Jonny Kearney & Lucy Farrell Folk from the Newcastle-based guitar and fiddle duo. The Lexington, Pentonville Rd, N1 9JB (020 7837 5371). £12, adv £9.50. Slow Club The Sheffield-based two-piece plays folk-pop. Village Underground, Holywell Ln, EC2A 3PQ (020 7422 7505). £8, adv £6. Tanlines The New York-based two-piece plays experimental pop. Cargo, Rivington St, EC2A 3AY (020 7739 3440). £8.50.
THE CRIBS The Troxy. Tues, May 8. £20 Back to their regular Johnny Marr-less numbers, Yorkshire’s garage-popsters tour in support of upcoming fifth album In The Belly Of The Brazen Bull. 490 Commercial Road, E1 0HX
WEDNESDAY 28
Limehouse
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THURSDAY 29
Teenage Cancer Trust: Example Electronic hip-hop and grime from the London-based rapper. Royal Albert Hall, Kensington Gore, SW7 2AP (0845 401 5045). £25-£75.
Black Stone Cherry, Rival Sons Hard rock from the Kentuckybased outfit. HMV Forum, Highgate Rd, NW5 1JY (020 7344 0044). £18.50.
Allo Darlin’, The Rumour Said Fire Pop-punk by the London-based outfit. Bull And Gate, Kentish Town Rd, NW5 2TJ (020 7704 0187). £9.
Guillemots Indie-rock by Fyfe Dangerfield and his Londonbased group. Village Underground, Holywell Ln, EC2A 3PQ (020 7422 7505). £17.50.
Teenage Cancer Trust: Roger Daltrey The singer-songwriter, musician and frontman of The Who plays rock with guests. Royal Albert Hall, Kensington Gore, SW7 2AP (0845 401 5045). £25-£75.
Matt Cardle The singer, guitarist and 2010 X Factor winner plays pop-rock in support of his album Letters. HMV Apollo, Queen Caroline St, W6 9QH (0843 221 0100). £28.
The Horrors Faris Badwan leads his band in playing synth-infused Gothic rock. The Bowery, New Oxford St, WC1A 1EP (020 7580 3057/ cc 0844 477 1000). £10.
The Deptford Rivieras Film, soul and lounge music by the sax-led combo. Boisdales Of Canary Wharf, Cabot Hall, E14 4QT (020 7715 5818). £10-£20.
Brian Kelly The outfit plays traditional Irish folk. Irish Cultural Centre, Blacks Rd, W6 9DT (020 8563 8232). £10, concs £8.
Everlast Grammy-winning rapper and songwriter Erik Schrody performs acoustic versions of his hip-hop and rock songs. 100 Club, Oxford St, W1D 1LL (020 7636 0933). £15. The Four Tops Classic Motown soul and pop by the veteran vocal group. The O2 Arena, Peninsula Sq, SE10 0DX (0844 856 0202). £42.50. Gazpacho Alt and art-rock by the Oslo-based band. The Garage, Highbury Corner, N5 1RD (0870 060 3777/ cc 0844 847 1678). £15. Kingmob Alt funk band from London. O2 Academy Islington, Parkfield St, N1 0PS (020 7288 4400/ cc 0844 477 2000). £12.50. The Little Band From Gingerland Alt rock by the Vienna band. The Forge Venue And Caponata Restaurant, Delancey St, NW1 7NL (020 7383 7808). £10, concs £8, adv £9, adv concs £7. Memoryhouse The Torontobased band performs indie-pop from its album The Slideshow Effect. Cargo, Rivington St, EC2A 3AY (020 7739 3440). £10. Spiro, Cliff Stapleton Traditional and contemporary folk music by the Bristol-based band. The Old Queen’s Head, Essex Rd, N1 8LN (020 7354 9993). £10, adv £8.
Craig Finn, We Three And The Death Rattle The American singersongwriter, guitarist and frontman of The Hold Steady plays indierock in support of his album Clear Heart Full Eyes. Hoxton Square Bar And Kitchen, Hoxton Sq, N1 6NU (020 7613 0709). £15. The Invisible London-based indie and experimental rock threepiece. Shacklewell Arms, Shacklewell Ln, E8 2EB (020 7249 0810). £6. Phoebe Killdeer & The Short Straws Alternative rock from the singer and group. Dingwalls, Camden Lock, Chalk Farm Rd, NW1 8AB (020 7428 0010/ cc 020 7428 5929). £10. The Marjorie Belles London-based retro a cappella three-piece. The Pheasantry, Kings Rd, SW3 4UT (020 7351 5031). £15, adv £12. Teenage Cancer Trust: Paul McCartney The former Beatle and singer-songwriter performs his hits. Royal Albert Hall, Kensington Gore, SW7 2AP (0845 401 5045). £70-£350.
Kadialy Kouyate & Sound Archive The Senegalese kora player and singer performs World music with his band. The Green Note Cafe, Parkway, NW1 7AN (020 7485 9899). £10.
Electric Wizard Doom and stoner metal by the Dorset-based combo. HMV Forum, Highgate Rd, NW5 1JY (020 7344 0044). £13.50. Gunslinger The band plays hard rock. The Underworld, Camden High St, NW1 0NE (020 7482 1932). £15. Infa Riot, The Warriors The London-based band plays punk and Oi!. The Garage, Highbury Corner, N5 1RD (0870 060 3777/ cc 0844 847 1678). £12.50. Lealea Jones R‘n’B, soul and pop by the London-based singer-songwriter. 93 Feet East, Brick Ln, E1 6RU (020 7770 6006). £8, concs/w/flyer £7, £5 before 9pm. The Kleeks The London-based band plays blues and R‘n’B with a retro feel. The Troubadour, Old Brompton Rd, SW5 9JA (020 7370 1434). £8, £7 before 10pm. Glen Matlock & The Philistines The London-born singer-songwriter and former Sex Pistols bassist leads his punk-rock outfit. Jamm, Brixton Rd, SW9 6LH (020 7346 8920/ cc 020 7274 5537). £11.
Rory McLeod Folk singersongwriter and storyteller. DHFC, Edgar Kail Way, SE22 8BD (07985 357958). £11, concs £7. Ikue Mori & Maja SK Ratkje Improvised avant-garde noise from the Japanese electronic composer and Norwegian vocalist. Cafe Oto, Ashwin St, E8 3DL (020 7923 1231). £12, adv £10. The Pigott Brothers The Canadian two-piece play acoustic pop and folk-rock. The Troubadour, Old Brompton Rd, SW5 9JA (020 7370 1434). £10 before 10pm. The Rifles The outfit plays mod-influenced indie-rock. O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, Shepherd’s Bush Green, W12 8TT (020 8354 3300/ cc 0844 477 2000). £17.
Mark Stewart Alt pop by the singer-songwriter from Bristol. The Scala, Pentonville Rd, N1 9NL (020 7833 2022/ cc 0844 477 1000). £13.50.
OFWGKTA Alt hip-hop from the Californian outfit. O2 Academy Brixton, Stockwell Rd, SW9 9SL (0844 477 2000). £17.50.
The Rinky Dinks The Bristolbased five-piece plays ukulele interpretations of popular songs. 229 The Venue, Great Portland St, W1W 5PW (020 7323 7229). £10, adv £8.
Payback The nine-piece plays soul and funk. Dover St Restaurant And Bar, Dover St, W1S 4LQ (020 7629 9813). £12, free for diners before 10pm.
Stiff Little Fingers Veteran Belfastbased punks. HMV Forum, Highgate Rd, NW5 1JY (020 7344 0044). £18.50.
Sugar T And The Swells The band plays rock ‘n’ roll and R‘n’B. Dover St Restaurant And Bar, Dover St, W1S 4LQ (020 7629 9813). £8, free for diners before 10pm.
Puressence The Manchesterbased four-piece plays acoustic indie-rock. Half Moon, Putney, Lower Richmond Rd, SW15 1EU (020 8780 9383). £12.
The Twang The West Midlands collective fuses indie-pop and house music. O2 Academy Islington, Parkfield St, N1 0PS (020 7288 4400/ cc 0844 477 2000). £15.
Pugwash Alt pop by the Dublinbased band. The Borderline, Orange Yard, Manette St, W1D 4JB (0870 060 3777/cc 0871 231 0842). £10. Room 94 Pop-rock combo from Hertfordshire. King’s College London Students’ Union, Macadam Building, Surrey St, WC2R 2NS (020 7848 1588). £10.
SUNDAY 1 Joy Dunlop, Twelfth Day Traditional Gaelic songs by the vocalist from Argyll. The Slaughtered Lamb, Great Sutton St, EC1V 0DX (020 7253 1516). £12. Teenage Cancer Trust: Jessie J Chart-topping pop, soul and R‘n’B from the London-based singer. Royal Albert Hall, Kensington Gore, SW7 2AP (0845 401 5045). £25-£75. Joe Longthorne The Hull-born, Blackpool-based vocalist performs pop, easy listening ballads and impersonations. Leicester Square Theatre, Leicester Place, WC2H 7BX (0844 873 3433). £25-£45. Twins Of Twins Novelty reggae by the Jamaican outfit. O2 Academy Brixton, Stockwell Rd, SW9 9SL (0844 477 2000). £27.50 & £32.
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Hallelujah: Donovan's looking ahead 24
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1491 London focus Jason Donovan.24 24
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Sing when you're winning After a turbulent career of very public ups and downs, Jason Donovan reveals he’s on the path to righteousness WORDS REBECCA KENT Jason Donovan is trying to find Jesus. After a rollercoaster career, which has seen him fade from man-of-the-moment to tabloid fodder, then back again, the singer is now firmly fixed on a path of religion. OK, so it’s not as you might expect – the 43-year-old hasn’t discovered God or had a brush with faith – instead he’s been selected as a judge on a new Andrew Lloyd Webber talent show. So pretty much the next best thing. Starring alongside Spice Girl Mel C on Jesus Christ Superstar, Donovan will be looking for someone to play the lead role. “Finding Jesus. That’s my line: ‘What have you been up to the last few days?’ I’ve been finding Jesus – but for us it’s going to take three months,” he laughs. However, all jokes aside, being back on prime-time national TV is a career move some might call a miracle, given the turbulence the Aussie star has had to overcome. Having started out in showbiz aged 11, Donovan hit the big time after starring as Scott Robinson in Neighbours, alongside Kylie Minogue, who became his on- and off-screen girlfriend. He left in 1989 to pursue a global pop career, playing sell-out concerts to screaming fans, selling millions of records worldwide as well as acting on the stage and in films. And it was assumed he’d stay there, his name in lights. But, instead, his career and personal life hit the rocks. In 1992, Donovan sued The Face over an article suggesting he was gay. Despite winning £200,000 in damages, his reputation plummeted, with accusations of homophobia. By 1995, Donovan admitted to having a huge drugs problem, taking up to 2g of coke a day. It wasn’t until five years later, and the birth of his first child, the actor was drug-free. But Donovan, now a father of three, says despite this downfall, he wouldn’t do things differently if he had the chance. “You tread the path that you tread in life and you can’t regret it,” he says. “We all make mistakes along the way, but they’re the sort of things that make you grow, and if you can learn to live with those things, you’ll move forward. No life is perfect.” Donovan is lucky enough to be talking from a privileged view, with the benefit of hindsight, as his career has certainly turned around. There was coming third on I’m A Celebrity, an album release after 15 years away from the studio with Let It Be Me, and a gig as a radio presenter on Heart. He describes it as a “little more dangerous“ than the
scripted TV soaps he’s used to. And last year, Donovan wrapped up a stint on Strictly Come Dancing. His efforts, even by his own admission, were a significant improvement on the moves he displayed in the Nineties. “There was a reason why people gave me a guitar back then – to balance out my disastrous dance routines. I think the whole Strictly experience was an opportunity to face my fears in a way,” he explains. “I’ve never been particularly well-versed with choreography, so I feel that it [dancing] wasn’t in my comfort zone – but I’m a relatively brave person. I like to try challenging things in my life.” For challenging, one can also read ‘flamboyant’ – such as prancing around on Echo Beach, slipping into fishnet stockings and suspenders as Dr Frank N Furter in the The Rocky Horror Show, and as a hot pants, headpiece-wearing drag queen in the West End stage show Priscilla. ”Priscilla was an incredible experience for me, I did about 450 shows, and a lot of people were very surprised it finished because they felt it was a show that was still ››
Album: Frank Sinatra tribute
Family: with wife Angela Malloch and two of their kids TNTMAGAZINE.COM
1491 London focus Jason Donovan.25 25
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Flamboyant: Donovan did 450 Priscilla shows entertaining many people.” Although Donovan says if he’s learned anything in life, it’s not to overdo it, adding he was pleased not to see the show ”dribble on”. He didn’t leave empty handed, though. ”I took home the giant flip-flop dress, and the shoes,” he admits. ”I always take costumes away from jobs I do as a memory, and one day I’m going to get them all framed.” Donovan’s latest BBC TV slot comes on the back of the launch of his new album Sign Of Your Love, ”a Frank Sinatra tribute”, which includes swinging band covers such songs as Everytime We Say Goodbye, and They Can’t Take
Kylie and Jason That Away From Me. He says: “The album certainly lies in my passion for a jazzier, more chilled-out, high-hat snare-type of sound. We’ve tried to keep the songs relative to the era I feel comfortable with and can sing.” The album has definitely put Donovan back in the spotlight – with him even appearing on Piers Morgan’s Life Stories on Saturday night, where he admitted to having had a hair transplant. He’s also been lined-up to perform a oneoff duet with Kylie, singing Especially For You [their 1988 hit] at London’s Hyde Park on July 11. But fans shouldn't get their hopes up too high – Donovan
“
I say I've been busy finding Jesus
”
Priscilla: just don't call him a queen 26
New album Sign of Your Love is out now
jasondonovan.org.uk
Photos: Getty
is a man looking ahead. ”I am very grateful for Too Many Broken Hearts [No1 in the UK in 1998] and Especially For You, but I don’t want to be doing that every year at Christmas. I’ve been there, and I’ll be doing again at some point in future, but there needs to be other things in my life – I’m too creative,” he says. But while Donovan is prepared to harness his creative energy into most things, he draws the line at Eurovision, which he was asked to enter before Engelbert Humperdinck. ”That wasn’t a difficult decision,” he says. ”I’m not really wanting to take on that sort of pressure at this time – being under the microscope. I just don’t think there’s an opportunity for someone to go a long way with that competition.” It remains to be seen whether Eurovision was a missed opportunity or not. However, given Donovan’s recent track record, more doors are bound to open – after he finds Jesus. So far though, he is a man happy with his lot. ”I’m grateful for the fact I know what I want to do with my life. I’ve always known where I want to be, and while I’m not always necessarily there, I’m always working towards something that involves entertainment.” Hallelujah to that. ❚
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ONE OF 5 PAIRS OF TICKETS TO SEE THE KING’S SPEECH David Seidler’s original play brings the audience face-to-face with Bertie, Duke Of York, as he is thrust on to the world stage as King George VI following his brother’s abdication. With the Nazi threat looming and civil unrest at home, royal secrets explode around Bertie as he struggles to find his voice as King. The King’s Speech is captivatingly brought to life on stage by an outstanding cast, with a shared warmth and intimacy that can only be experienced in the theatre. Enter at tntmagazine.com/competitions kingsspeechtheplay.com
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James Allan The Glasvegas frontman on their next album, Beatles covers, and why nice guys finish first INTERVIEW ALASDAIR MORTON
How’s the third album coming along? We’re just playing music and practising songs with the band right now, trying to find out what we have to say and what sentiment we would like to express. The songs start in an infant stage, and in no time at all they start to take on a life of their own and they’re walking themselves. How’s it taking shape so far – your first album was quite personal but follow-up Euphoric /// Heartbreak \\\ less so ... There were some personal songs on the first record, but not as much as people think. On Geraldine I sang, “My name is Geraldine and I’m you social worker,” people actually forget that sometimes I am not a female, I’m not called Geraldine, I’ve never had a pair of boobs! That song’s not personal to me. But I think this one will be more personal than the first two. Is it important to have that? I need to feel like I have a purpose, so when I’m standing onstage in Chicago on a Tuesday night, there is a reason for me doing it. For the first few songs on this album, I started to feel that again. Is it going to continue the musical ambition of the last record? Bands sometimes say they are doing things that no one has ever heard before, but I’d like to think that we are being curious and going to places we’ve not explored before. There are always going to be parts of this band’s sound, though, that will be in there somewhere. But we are moving in a different direction now.
Photos: Pip
Are you going to be playing any new stuff at the Garage show? Yeah, a few new songs, we’ll be doing one called I’d Rather Be Dead and one called If. How did Johanna’s (Löfgren, drummer) arrival change the band dynamic? When she came in around the second album, she wasn’t involved in the recording, so this one will have more of her. It was strange – we were drummer less for the last album! Instead of me recording all the parts and then everyone hearing it at the end, this one’s been more collaborative. That’s normally how bands do it but it is a new approach for us.
Back in black (maybe): James Allan (front) Is the wardrobe going to be back in black or are you going to keep with the white for this one? White is quite hard to maintain. It’s mad – I’m used to looking a bit ridiculous, I did in the past before I even wore white, but I still meet people who come up and say, “I am so happy that you are wearing black”. I never thought it would make someone think better things about their own life because of the colour of my clothes. It makes me wonder who the nutcase is here – me for wearing these or them for caring so much? How do you feel about Euphoric /// Heartbreak \\\’s success, or lack of commercially, 12 months on? We’ve learned a few things. In a nutshell, we ran out of money recording and had no cash for advertising, not even in magazines. People might say “you shouldn’t need to advertise if it’s good enough” but that’s not the world we live in. Did you part ways with the record company amicably then? Three weeks after the album came out, we were dropped – which can’t be because there were good or bad songs on it. Mad things happened – we paid a guy £30,000 to mix the record but then had some disagreements and he never mixed a track. That wasn’t us that was the label, we never agreed to it.
Do you like doing hometown shows? They are always really large – all your family comes down, so it is like the birthday party that you never asked for. The first time we played the Glasgow Barrowlands – where we used to go and watch other bands perform – it was amazing. After the show, my uncle walked into the dressing room and said, “I was a bit disappointed, you never played any Beatles songs”. I said: “Yeah, but we played our songs, did you hear everyone singing them?” And he said: “Yeah, but it would have been better if you’d done some Beatles stuff.” The Stone Roses have reformed – you played with Ian Brown once before ... Their reforming seems quite sincere. Our first support tour was with Ian Brown, and I have always appreciated how well he treated the band – we didn’t have a record deal, no one knew us, but he went out of his way to help us. Normally, the bands people think are quite mental and must be fucking maniacs actually turn out to be sweet and humble. Ian Brown, Oasis and U2, they probably wouldn’t like me saying that though, not good for their image. Glasvegas play The Garage on April 3. £17 N5 1RD Highbury & Islington venues.meanfiddler.com/the-garage
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Future fashions left much to be desired
THE HUNGER GAMES FILM review by Alasdair Morton STARRING: Jennifer Lawrence, Josh Hutcherson | 12A | 142mins
BREAKING WIND FILM STARRING: Heather Ann Davis, Eric Callero | 15 | 79mins
The Twilight saga is ripe for spoof – the sexless lusting, the so-sincere relationship woes, and the perennially topless dudes. This crudely titled mockmovie features 18-stone Jacob and his pack of five belly wolf-cub buddies in a piss-take in the vein of the Scary Movies. These sort of smut-fest film pastiche mash-ups often work better as sketches than full-blown movies. On general release from Friday
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This adaptation of Suzanne Collins’ young adult trilogy is expected to be the next Twilight-style fantasy franchise. It has the credentials – the prospective love triangle, the genre setting (this time a dystopia where young ‘uns fight to the death in the titular reality TV show) and the built-in fanbase. One thing it has over its vamp-cousin, though, is a leading lady strong enough to carry it all. Jennnifer Lawrence stars as Katniss, a young girl in one of the poorer districts surrounding the mega-city Capitol where all the glammed-up rich folk live. Katniss is chosen to compete in the games, a battle to the death where only one can live. Lawrence is a solid lead, balancing the bow-wielding brawn of Katniss (who has honed her sharp-shooter skills hunting for food in the forests of her home District 12) with the vulnerability of someone who is fighting for her life, handling both the action and emotional upheaval with aplomb. Woody Harrelson, looking like a washed-up rock star, is also good value as a grog-soaked former Hunger Games victor brought in to mentor the new combatant, and the film successfully satirises reality TV, mining intellectual smarts for the teeny-bopper crowd alongside all the death-arena antics. It is an action set piece or two short by blockbuster standards, though, and a little too keen on setting up its ensuing chapters to satisfy fully, but in Lawrence’s Katniss, it has a positive heroine who is better suited to today’s world, and whose plight would be rewarded by the continuation film(s) there is sure to be. GOOD FOR: Seeing a ‘star in the making’ turn from Jennifer Lawrence
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GIVE US A
RICHARD HERRING – WHAT IS LOVE ANYWAY?
GIGGLE!
COMEDY
After considering religion in his Christ On A Bike show, the reliably fantastic Herring turns his attention on love here, and what, exactly, it is. We’d expect him to be characteristically dour and dismissive, but with his impending nuptials this spring, it’s highly possible that cupid’s arrow has softened his outlook.
Ha ha!
Bloomsbury Theatre 15 Gordon Street, WC1H 0AH. Fri, Mar 30 £15 Euston thebloomsbury.com
BRITISH DESIGN 1948-2012
ALL NEW PEOPLE
EXHIBITION
THEATRE
Celebrating design in fashion, fine art, graphics, architecture and industrial products that are British in origin (you’ve got to be born, worked or trained in the UK for your output to qualify). Items include the classic Mini Cooper, Mary Quaint mini dresses (think Austin Powers-era chic), and the now-grounded Concorde.
Far from credible and poorly written, Zach Braff’s much-hyped and supposedly darkly comic off-Broadway offering – about four people thrown together in a deserted Long Beach island where they attempt to reinvent themselves – is cruelly exposed on the West End stage and will disappoint fans of Garden State and Scrubs. LK
V&A Musuem Cromwell Rd, SW7 2RL. Mar 31-Aug 12. £12 South Kensington vam.ac.uk
Duke or York’s Theatre SWC2N 4BG. From £15. Until Apr 28 Leicester Square allnewpeople.co.uk
DAVE FULTON What’s your show about? I’m gigging constantly – I’m doing a solo show at the Soho Theatre on May 25 & 26 – based on my honest Based On A True Story show from the Edinburgh Festival last year.
Photos: Getty
What was your first gig and how did it go? Spokane Washington at The Bridge, and unfortunately it went well. Getting laughs is a narcotic, and when it didn’t go as well the second time, I had to do it again and again.
BABYCALL
ABIGAIL’S PARTY
FILM
THEATRE
Noomi Rapace (the original Girl With The Dragon Tattoo) stars in this thriller as a mother who flees an abusive husband with her son to a remote house where she finds strange sounds keep appearing on the baby monitor. Unlikely to be as block-busting as the series that made Rapace, this tough thriller will do until her next, slightly higher-profile release, Prometheus.
We’re back in the Seventies for Lindsay Posner’s immensely enjoyable revival of what is probably Mike Leigh’s best-known play – about a suburban soirée that lifts the lid on people’s genuine relationships and emotions – and the one that brought him to prominence. It’s very funny – but with a cruel edge to the humour. LK
On general release from Friday
Menier Chocolate Factory SE1 1RU. Until April 21. £29.50 London Bridge menierchocolatefactory.com
What’s the weirdest gig you have ever done? I can’t remember how many weird gigs I’ve done. White Horse Yukon Trapper Days, Kazahkstan; a barge off the coast of Honolulu; a snowmobile owners’ convention – the list goes on. Any clown can play clubs but the real interesting stuff makes good stories. How do you deal with hecklers? I cut their heads off. If you weren’t doing this, what would you be doing? Ice climbing and/or directing my next film project. Laughing Boy Comedy
Relay,
Bermondsey Street Tunnel, SE1 3JW. Mar 29 £10
London Bridge
relay-london.com
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SPARETIME
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Mass Effect 3 X360
All-out galactic war ensues after an ancient alien race known as Reapers invades. £37.97 asda.com
Album
Dancefloor bombs from not one, but two, party greats. £8.95 zavvi.com
Resident Evil: Operation Racoon City
Madonna: MDNA
PS3
No, not zombie racoons. But that would be interesting... £37.99 argos.co.uk
Album
Has the amount of club pop on the record got anything to do with its name? You decide. £9.95 base.com
Qello iPhone
Dan May: The Red Hot Chilli Cookbook
Watch high-definition gigs and documentaries from the likes of Jay-Z and The Stones. £2.99 per month
Book
For those who like their grub with an extra fiery kick. £16.99 amazon.co.uk
apple.itunes.com
Picnic Wars iPhone, iPad
William Fotheringham: Merckx: Half Man Half Bike
Lead an edible army and reduce your enemies to a juicy pulp – FOOD FIGHT! £0.69 itunes.apple.com
Book
The Muhammad Ali of cycling, Merckx has earned himself 445 victories. £11.09 waterstones.com
DeskPets TankBot Gadget
Boy toy alert: it’s a mini pettank that operates through Android and iPhone. £24.99
The Awakening
monsterstuff.co.uk
DVD
Dominic West and Rebecca Hall in a boarding school paranormal chiller. £8.99 play.com
The Powermonkey Discovery charger Portable charger
Charge most electricals without a socket. £45.00
Top Gear: The Great Adventures 5
powertraveller.com
DVD
The controversial expedition to India with three old British cars, a lawnmower and that trouser press. £9.95 thehut.com
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App of the Week Gogobot iPhone
The addictive travel site’s new app lets you create photo postcards, ask for and post tips, and be inspired by other people’s reviews. Free gogobot.com
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Short summer dress Add tights, sunkissed skin and a leather jacket, and you’re ready to go wild.
Men’s rust tribal print T-shrit Are you going to be bold this summer?
Aztec hood denim western jacket Wear this and you’ll be fit to work the ranch.
sugarhillboutique.com.
riverisland.com
topman.com
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SHOPWATCH PUMA
Sports hounds and athletic streetwear enthusiasts alike should find a few things to throw in the shopping basket at Puma’s Carnaby Street store, which has undergone a revamp. Now the long-established sports brand’s flagship venue, it even further reinforces the brand as high fashion rather than just functional sportswear. Techheads involved in the design process have turned the 240sqm of floorspace space into an immersive shopping experience, with an iPad wall so shoppers can share their thoughts in real time. Plus, overhead screens will feature hypnotic, slow moving visuals of scenarios from fluffy clouds to underwater scenes with the bellies of sharks. Expect all the Puma footwear favourites, plus one-off designer styles, and clothing that extends even to motorsport. It’s a dream for sportsfans. OPEN Mon-Fri 10am-8pm; Sat, 10am-7pm, Sun 12pm-6pm 52-55 Carnaby Street, W1F 9QE puma.com Oxford Circus
World prints
Red dress A neckline like this is cause for some serious jungle fever. bonprix.co.uk
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Pocahontas top Just go Navajo
.95
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apricotonline.co.uk
£70
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MIA dress A piece of ethical fashion, with African textiles and old men’s shirts.
.95
£11
fashionbymia.com
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Dream catcher earrings You’ll sleep well after this purchase. tribalmango.co.uk
Tapestry Espadrille Wedges Rock the pavement in these wild babies.
Men’s trilby Get ahead of the rest with this handy bit of festival fashion. matalan.co.uk
asos.com
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LIFESTYLEHEALTH CLASS OF THE WEEK
BLUE COW
YOGA
The City’s first dedicated yoga studio, this establishment is a little pocket of tranquility in London’s corporate jungle. Tucked away in a basement, Blue Cow is set to convert the capital’s suited and booted to the art of bending, stretching and mindfulness. It operates on the philosphy everyone needs yoga, but if classes are limited to noisy gyms at unsuitable times, no one needs it that much. “We also need yoga that makes us smile ... without overdosing on smells and bells; and we need yoga taught in a ... place full of like-minded people who believe it’s more fun doing it together,” reads the website. Having tried the studio, we can vouch it achieves all those things. When I walk in, I don’t feel as though I’d stumbled into a commune overdosed on tie-dye. Outside the main studio, there is a comfortable, airy space for yogis to mingle. Lessons, including pilates, are for beginners and seasoned yogis, and are scheduled regularly. They include classes where you can walk in and out when you like, so no embarrassing late entrances. I’m a convert.
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Weird gadgets Bad breath testers and sweat-inducing undies – the world of health and beauty has gone mad WORDS CLARE VOOGHT
Anyone bored by their grooming routine will be pleased to know there are some products out there that are both useful and rather funny. Here are our top three weird health and grooming gadgets for girls and guys.
FOR GIRLS 1. PERSPIRATION PANTS A lazy girl’s dream, these nude hotpants can be worn under everyday clothes to reduce cellulite. Tess Daly and Holly Valance love them. Not that weird? Think again. Going on the basis that for each gram of sweat, you lose half a calorie, the hotpants work by making you sweat more. And if worn in the gym, they increase sweating by 80 per cent and profess to make a 30-minute workout, as calorie blasting as a 60-minute one. Lovely. £44.99 zaggora.com 2. THE NECK TONER Do jowls and saggy necks strike fear into you if they’re so much as mentioned? Well,
fend off any lower-facial droops with the Neckline Trainer by Paul Younane. The device helps you flex your neck and jaw muscles for two minutes a day to tone, strengthen and define the weakened muscles. Comes with an instruction DVD and three different resistance coils for beginners, intermediate and advanced. Say ‘aaah’ ... £29.95 paulyounane.com 3. THE PMS MAGNET A pink, glittery magnet, about the size of a £2 coin, that ladies can leave inside their pants to miraculously alleviate period pain – sounds ridiculous, right? But 94 per cent of women in clinical trials noticed their cramps were reduced or completely relieved, and 70 per cent reported a decrease in irritability. Women also reported fewer spots and improvements in other symptoms of PMS. The magnet is said to work by stimulating circulation in the area. £20.95 mn8.uk.com
7 Moorgate, EC2R 6AF bluecowyoga.com Moorgate
The almighty back shaver
For an ultra-toned chin, neck and jaw 34
Scientifically proven to stop PMS
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MAKE ME OVER
Colour me up nail polish set Four bold colours for fingers £19.99 beautyconcepts.co.uk
Bare Minerals hello gorgeous Say hi to bare skin beauty £24.00 debenhams.com
A man with an arsenal of gadgets is a happy one
FOR GUYS 1. BAD BREATH TESTER Judge how close you should get on a hot date with a little gadget that tests your breath. You’ll be ranked from 0-4 (each with a different cartoon face) based on the gases in your breath. £19.99 play.com 2. THE MANWASHER This kit means business. In with your usual Cool Metal shower gel and bodyspray, you’ll find one serious scrubbing device to keep your bod squeaky clean. One side has an exfoliating mesh, which looks a little like a kitchen scourer, and a high-wear lathering
micro-mesh for efficient soap distribution. You’ll never feel cleaner. £4.99 superdrug.com 3. THE DIY BACKSHAVER Hairy backs aren’t hot, but nor is asking your girlfriend to shave it for you. Do the honours yourself with a bending Inspector Gadget style shaving device called a Mangroomer, that reaches every inch of your back. It’s lightweight and it folds up, so it’s perfect for travelling – sport NEXT WEEK your super-smooth torso on the beach Top men’s London grooming on your next trip. £29 amazon.co.uk
Kyoku men’s lip fuel Smooch those chicks £11.00 boots.com
Photos: Thinkstock
TOP TREATMENT: CHOCOLATE PEDICURE With only a week to go until Lent ends, if you’ve given up chocolate, chances are you’re suffering. Satiate your cravings with a divine hour of guilt-free indulgence with a chocolate pedicure. Your feet will be lovingly primped and primed with heavenly products that smell of the sweet stuff for a full hour, while you sip green tea and munch on fruit and cake (non-chocolate option available). Sure you’ll be able to hang in there for a few more days. £55.00
Let your feet break Lent
10 Godliman Street, EC4V 5AJ
ajalaspa.com
St Paul’s
Gilette Irritation Defense Sensitive shaving foam £2.49 boots.com
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LIFESTYLECAREERS
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Mix it up: cocktail-making isn’t as easy as it looks
Shaken not stirred Working in a cocktail bar is no longer just a part-time job WORDS REBECCA KENT
If you’re a night owl, with an enthusiasm for alcohol that extends past just drinking it, and you enjoy a good yarn, then a job in a cocktail bar could be a just the fit. TNT finds out what it takes to shake it.
banter, and, of course, drinking alcohol, are all a part of the job,” he says. “You tend to embrace the culture, but learn how to be sensible, too – god knows how many pot plants I’ve killed, throwing shots over my shoulder.”
Fun with your clothes on
Swot up on the news
This type of job is the epitome of cool. Just look at Hollywood: Tom Cruise’s character went from college kid to barman of your dreams in Cocktail, and, in Coyote Ugly, everyone just took off their clothes and danced tantalisingly on the bar. Happy days! OK, those films might be a little dated, but according to Ben Reed, the BBC’s ‘Shaker Maker’ and author of The Bartender’s Guide, the fun never disappeared. “Great camaraderie,
Oddly, Reed, who is also a spokesman for Funkin’ (funkin.co.uk), cites a broad knowledge of current affairs as the top skill requirement, reasoning, “people want to chat to a bar tender”. He adds: “You also want to be able to appraise your customer like a good salesman, and understand how they want you to behave – that could mean all singing and all dancing.” On the practical side, apparently spatial awareness is a must. “You
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are working in confined areas with dangerous elements – glass, water, electricity and ice,” Reed says.
Moving up the bar path There’s no fixed route to becoming a mixologist, though potential employers will expect you to have experience of working behind a bar. “Most guys I know started in the back bar emptying bins and filling ice wells,” Reed says. “It’s usually not long before a mentor will take you under their wing and train you up, before you move on to classier establishments. You could also jump into the deep-end and start at an average cocktail bar, but you will learn bad techniques.” Another avenue is learning the trade
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ON THE JOB DJ SPIDER CAREER DJ AGE Old enough to know better LIVES The Old Kent Road FROM Caterham How did you get into your line of work? I started a mobile disco with a couple of friends to pick up girls but I was better at DJing than picking up girls! My partners eventually dropped out and I continued to make it my career – in pubs, bars, dives, then clubs.
Things could get ugly ... Coyote Ugly at a bar-tending school. Shaker UK (shakeruk.com) runs classes in bartending, cocktailmaking and flair, and is recognised by global establishments. Spokesman David Baker says: “Hotel bars and high-end cocktail bars are prepared to pay people more if they’ve mastered cocktail-making officially. These people will serve quicker, and make better quality drinks every time, versus someone who has just winged it.”
A COCKTAIL REVOLUTION Gone are the days cocktails were all a bit brash. They are now a given on a night out on the tiles, and it’s not necessarily about flair. Cocktail-making is a serious pursuit, with an increased interest in making them a culinary equal. The Heston-Blumenthal-esque scientific food revolution has spilled into cocktail land and it’s playing with our senses – think foams and evaporations. Purl bar (purl-london.com) in Marylebone is paving the way, chilling its cocktails with nitrogen for a theatrical drinking experiences. Layers don’t cut it anymore.
Photos: Thinkstock
A tip to remember Cocktail-making is a skill you can take abroad. For example, working as a mixologist serving first-class passengers on international airlines. The pay will vary, but you can expect to start on the minimum wage (£6.08 in the UK) which will increase with the reputation of the establishment – and don’t forget about the service charge. Baker says: “Ten years ago, a barman would really have struggled financially, but the tipping culture now has made bartending a viable career move.”
Raise the bar
Another way to get your foot in the door is knowing the industry. “Get your name out there. Blogging, tweeting and writing for magazines or papers – this will absolutely get you on the ladder,” says Reed, who for two years wrote the Barfly column for the Saturday Times magazine. “Write about what’s happening in your area, or the drinks you tried on your holiday.” Mingling with other bartenders and going to openings are also worthwhile.
The end of the road It’s also good to know there’s a future in alcohol, should you decide to step away from the bar. You could run your own or become a brand ambassador. “Far from having a stuffy old man in suit selling booze, a bar would much prefer to buy alcohol NEXT WEEK from a hot guy or girl who knows Working in Cape Town how to make a drink.”
What do you do day-to-day? After eight years of making mashups, I’m now trying to get together my own house production with some of the performers at Bunga Bunga. What’s the best part of your job? A great deal of satisfaction seeing people jumping up and down and enjoying the set that I put together. What’s the most challenging? Keeping it fresh and keeping the audience captivated for hours at a time. It’s not rocket science but it is an art form. bungabunga-london.com
HOW TO... THINK
OUTSIDE THE BOX Lateral thinking can help you approach problems in new, innovative ways. Here’s how:
• Read trade magazines and
learn about other industries. They may tackle similar challenges differently.
• Draw a picture. It’s a right-
brain activity that can help to break your logical leftbrain’s hold on a problem.
• Embrace mistakes and
randomness and incorporate them into your projects to overcome thinking patterns.
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tntjobs.co.uk www.mykidscoach.co.uk
JOB OF THE WEEK: Qualified secondary teachers to be Homework Partners Location: London Salary: Around £20 an hour
mykidscoach is an agency that gives teachers extra work in their spare time as a homework partners or sporting coaches.
Homework Partners supervise children’s homework after school/weekends. You help the children organise their homework and make sure it is finished to a high standard. You will test/answer questions but you are not a tutor.
MYKIDSCOACH.CO.UK
Please send CV to mykidscoach@me.com. Find out more at mykidscoach.co.uk
T: 020 8522 2095 www.showforce.com
JOB OF THE WEEK: Event Crew Location: London Salary: £8+ per hour + skills payments
Showforce are leading providers of Event Crew for a wide range of events, both in the UK and internationally.
Showforce are seeking physically fit, English speaking, enthusiastic, ambitious Event Crew for London in 2012! Showforce Crew go the extra mile to deliver the best support to all deadlines. Fast Track available to experienced Crew.
SHOWFORCE
south.jobs@showforce.com
SHERPA EVENTS www.eventsherpa.co.uk
JOB OF THE WEEK: Event Porters/Drivers/Crew Location: London Salary: Up to £10ph depending on roles
SHERPA is a leading supplier of intelligent, articulate and professional porters, drivers and crew to the UK event industry. We work at the UK’s best-known events and venues, from high-profile sporting festivals and new product launches, to big-budget private and corporate events.
SHERPA are looking for reliable, hard-working and presentable team players with excellent spoken English to join us this year. Experience in either catering or production work is preferred but not necessary. However, applicants to our driver roles must have relevant experience.
CLASSROOM LIMITED
JOB OF THE WEEK: Year 5 Teacher Location: South East London Salary: £130.00 - £160.00 DOE
T: 020 7636 0600 www.classroomteachers.co.uk Classroom is an established recruitment services provider, providing exceptional levels of service. Our dedicated teams of consultants have a wealth of teaching expertise and education recruitment experience.
MARYLEBONE CRICKET CLUB T: 020 7616 8548 www.lords.org The most famous cricket ground in the world, Lord’s is a place where legends are made. It is steeped in history and charm, with extraordinary architecture and a fascinating collection of cricketing art and memorabilia.
CHARLES DUCKER d22carework@hotmail.co.uk The candidate should be aware that the employer is capable of making choices that affect their daily life and that they are able to direct the assistance they require and therefore, don’t need a carer because the term “carer” takes the control away from the user.
CV to john@eventsherpa.co.uk
Are you a KS2 Teacher looking for a new and exciting role? A school in the London Borough of Southwark are looking for a qualified Year 5 teacher for a class of 15 pupils with an immediate start, continuing for one year. This role requires the teacher to have a minimum of one year’s experience of class teaching in the UK. A talented teacher with a confident and professional manner will do well in this excellent school and someone who is keen to teach a smaller class will thrive in this unusually small year group. Caroline Hardwick | 020 7636 0600 | caroline@classroomteachers.co.uk
JOB OF THE WEEK: Catering and Hospitality Jobs Location: St. John’s Wood, London Salary: Up to £14.94 per hour The World Famous Lord’s Cricket Ground is looking for Catering and Hospitality staff. Our work is flexible to fit even the busiest schedule. You can work as much as you want and when you want. You can work with your friends, meet new people and have fun while you earn. We offer full training and pay very competitive rates. Please email your CV to cateringjobs@lords.org for immediate start
JOB OF THE WEEK: Live-in Carer on an alternate basis Location: London Salary: On Application Will be shared by two Personal Assistance working alternate weeks starting Mid- April. Whilst working, you will live in the employers house on a 24/7 basis. Must supply a National insurance number, and only English Speakers need apply. For further details please E-mail: d22carework@hotmail.co.uk
Looking for your next job? NEW JOBS ONLINE EVERY DAY To advertise your job of the week contact Matt Syder | 020 7989 0491 | matt.syder@tntmagazine.com
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CASH-SAVING TIPS
LIFESTYLEMONEY
HOW YOU SPEND IT!
A little out of pocket this Xxxxxxxxx month? These deals of the week will help you save XXXXXXXXX
can and try not to go too crazy in all the shops. Last big blow-out? I have been quite controlled recently as I’m saving for a sunny holiday, but every now and then I slip up and spend a little too much money on CDs. HMV is my weakness!
Xxxxxxxxxxx
FREE WHITE STUFF Sign up with grocery XXXXXXXXX delivery site Milk & More Xxxxxxxxxxx by March 31 and you’ll get £10 of milk for free. The XXXXXXXXX service also sells bread, Xxxxxxxxxxx cereal, fruit, veg and other supermarket essentials. XXXXXXXXX So you can sort out your Xxxxxxxxxxx weekly shop without even having to leave your sofa. milkandmore.co.uk HAVE CASH, WILL TRAVEL If you’ve got the urge to escape, Hotels.com is hosting a spring sale. There’s a rather generous 40 per cent off rooms across the globe between April 1 and May 7. Book by April 9 to get your juicy hotel deal.
JEN HARRIS, 23 JOB Senior sales assistant FROM Devon LIVES Highbury How do you budget? I know I will need a certain amount for rent, my Oyster
Photos: Getty
Any money-saving tips? Try to walk wherever you
What non-essential items do you spend money on? CDs, DVDs, clothes, concert tickets, train tickets to visit family and friends. Sometimes if I’m having a rubbish day I treat myself to a fancy sandwich. Unnecessary but worth it!
HOW THEY SPEND IT! The Royal cloth Kate Middleton has made headlines for being thrifty, stepping out in a two-year-old coat from Bicester village last month. But the royals still love their luxurious fabrics
BEAUTY FOR CHEAP If you’re in need of some pampering, head to The Body Shop for discounted products. Spend £30 or more by April 30 to recieve £10 off; spend £40 to get £15 off; and purchases over £50 will save you a tidy £25. For details see thebodyshop.co.uk ANZAC DAY /74 LATE DEALS /60
card and my food shopping. I usually know what I will be spending each month before I spend it, which helps me to keep tabs.
❚ Prince William ordered a grey pinstripe suit for his and Kate’s honeymoon, made with £1400-a-metre wool from Australian merino sheep. We hope K-Mid liked it, too. ❚ Prince Charles has
Our Kate loves a bargain
a penchant for pricey footwear. But he’s been wearing the same £2500 Lobb of St James’s shoes for more than 40 years.
❚ Remember the vomtastic headwear Princess Beatrice wore at last year’s royal wedding (of course you do)? It was rumoured to have cost at least £2000. ❚ Prince Harry spent a much more respectable £115 on some tobacco-coloured suede shoes from Russel & Bromley to wear in Belize this month. But they were dubbed ‘ageing’ and ‘awful’.
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Let your smartphone do the hard work when you’re house hunting
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WORDS CLARE VOOGHT
Everyone dreads trawling the internet for properties that are snapped up before they can even get a viewing. Keep on top of the property-hunting game with these apps that let you look for places wherever you are. London 2012 double sheets Olympics up your bed tesco.com
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Nine-piece Easter baking set With egg and bunny cookie cutters qvcuk.com
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Spare Room, 4/5 WHAT DOES IT DO The app from the country’s most widely used flatshare website helps you scout out rooms in shared accommodation by location. You can save adverts for places you like and manage your SpareRoom.co.uk user account from your phone. BEST FEATURE It acts as a messaging service to advertisers, so you can get directly in touch with people who might have a room going spare. EASY TO USE? Menus are easy to navigate and you can phone a potential roommate with one touch. VERDICT Quick, simple and does the job, but would be better with a map view. AVAILABLE ON iPhone COST Free spareroom.co.uk
reader, that shows you more info when you spot an ad you like the look of. EASY TO USE? Very. Menus are simple and it lets you quickly scroll through properties in one half of the screen while you view each one on the map on the other half. VERDICT Quick and incredibly thorough. AVAILABLE ON iPhone, iPad. Also a version on Samsung Smart TVs. COST Free rightmove.co.uk
Prime Location Property Search, 4/5 WHAT DOES IT DO Gives detailed information through a location-based search and remembers your recent search history so you don’t lose any
Rightmove, 5/5
Copenhagen tea towel Think of travel when you wash up skandivis.co.uk
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WHAT DOES IT DO Lets you search more than 1.2 million properties for sale or rent and see the results on the map. Other features include full advanced search filters, property floorplans and synching with your account on the Rightmove website. BEST FEATURE The app now contains a QR
properties you’re interested in. It’s handy for people flathunting in groups as you can send properties to friends, too. BEST FEATURE Slick navigation. The iPad version lets you view and navigate through
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LIFESTYLELIVING MORE APPS A few extra apps to help when it comes to moving house... Buy vs Rent, iPhone, £0.69 Not sure whether to buy or rent your next pad? This app figures out exactly how much each will cost, so you can be completely informed before you compare the two choices. itunes.apple.com
Your dream place might only be an app download away prospective properties that pop up from a swishy spiral and the iPhone version has an augmented reality map that shows available properties in relation to where you are, or where you search. EASY TO USE? Tabs are set out clearly. VERDICT The iPad and iPhone apps are definitely slick, but the Android one includes the latest news about the property market. AVAILABLE ON iPad, iPhone, Android COST Free primelocation.com
Photos: Getty
Spicerhaart Land & New Homes, 5/5 WHAT DOES IT DO Renters and buyers can search, save and create notes about properties they like. Users can also set up notifications to receive updates on new properties that meet their search criteria. BEST FEATURE It’s another app that’s great if you’re looking as part of a group as it allows
you to share properties with friends and family via email and social networking sites. EASY TO USE? Notifications help guide you through the app by explaining each feature you might want to use. VERDICT A good all-round app for buying and renting. AVAILABLE ON iPhone, iPad, Android COST Free spicerhaartlandandnewhomes.co.uk
Kinleigh Folkard & Hayward London Property Search, 3/5 WHAT DOES IT DO Search through 3,000 properties available to rent and buy in London through the agent. You can find your nearest office, if all this app-cruising has left you in need of some face-to-face time, and search back through recent searches if you’ve forgotten to save what you were looking at. BEST FEATURE It lets you stay in touch directly with the agent through the app’s one-touch email or call feature. This makes arranging viewings a piece of cake. EASY TO USE? The homepage is simple, with a searchbox up top and a menu underneath. Property searches are also simple to scroll your way through. VERDICT A simple search app with a good range of properties. NEXT WEEK AVAILABLE ON Spotlight on iPhone COST Free Kentish Town kfh.co.uk
Walk Score, iPhone, Android, Free Use GPS to find out what’s in a new neighbourhood. It’s perfect for finding out whether that dream flat has supermarkets, bars, coffee shops, cinemas, parks and all the other important things within handy walking distance – before you move in. walkscore.com Kirstie and Phil’s Househunter, iPhone, £2.99 Advice from the property gurus in your pocket. With tips on making searches, arranging viewings and putting in an offer. It’s got plenty of video guides and audio tips, plus advice on dealing with agents and getting mortgages. kirstieandphil.com Crime Spy UK, iPhone, Free Don’t know an area that well? Use police figures to scope out how safe it is before you move. With maps to pinpoint specific locations and a crime breakdown for each neighbourhood. You can specify dates and then email the results. data.gov.uk/apps/crime-spy-uk Moving Planner, Android, £0.69 Cancelling bills, sorting out deposits – there’s still lots to think about after you find that perfect place. This app helps you plan your move with lists, and more than 210 preloaded tasks to choose from. play.google.com/store/apps
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WORLDVIEW
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Sperm: used for good luck rituals
COPS TRACKING SPERM-HUNTERS ZIMBABWE Girl gangs in Zimbabwe are reportedly preying on male travellers to harvest their sperm. Victims have been held at gunpoint and, in one case, threatened with a live snake, then administered a sexual stimulant and forced into repeated intercourse, before being dumped by the side of the road. The intended use of the sperm is unclear but it is believed it could be used in traditional rituals. “These cases occurred mostly when the victims were hitchhiking and boarded private vehicles,” police spokesman Wayne Bvudzijena said. “We encourage people to use public transport.” TWEETS OF THE WEEK @_Snape_ What’s the difference between Jennifer Lawrence & Kristen Stewart? Jennifer Lawrence is an actress... @charltonbrooker Tax relief for games industry? But they’re loaded. Played a game the other day; gold coins all over the place. Some floating in midair. @Joey7Barton 98% of stats are produced by sad lonely people who have mastered the art of masturbation.
ATHEISTS USE MOPS TO UNBLESS ROAD UNITED STATES A crowd of atheists in Florida spent part of their weekend washing away a blessing placed upon a local highway by a religious group. Armed with brooms, mops and “unholy water”, the atheists gathered to 42
Yesterday’s giant figurines, today’s kindling: On the last day of the Las Fallas festival in Valencia, Spain, everything goes up in smoke, including, most spectacularly, the giant effigies which, in the preceding days, were paraded proudly through the streets
symbolically clean up holy oil that Polk Under Prayer put down on Highway 98 near the Pasco-Polk county line last year. “We come in peace,” Humanists of Florida director Mark Palmer said before he and other atheists started scrubbing. “That’s normally what aliens say when they visit a new planet, but we’re not aliens, we’re atheists!”
POT MACHINE SEIZED IN RAID NEW ZEALAND Police raided an Auckland warehouse where procannabis activists had allegedly been selling the
drug from a vending machine. Four people were arrested and police seized $27,000 (£14k) cash, cannabis and drug paraphernalia from the New Lynn Daktory, where pot- smokers were allegedly able to buy 1g bags of cannabis from a slot machine for $20 (£14). “It has been very popular, quite a few people come here,” activist Julian Crawford said, indicating “a few hundred” sales were made on busy nights.
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THIS WEEK
IN NUMBERS 14 Peter Venkman never got distracted by olive oil
Pounds spent by a south London woman on chemotherapy for her pet lizard, forcing her to postpone her wedding
ADELAIDE’S HAUNTED SUPERMARKET AUSTRALIA An Adelaide supermarket is haunted, according to its owner, who discovered on CCTV that a packet of snacks had been flung 11 feet during the night. The IGA in Brompton is long-believed to be haunted, and the video, although unclear, also shows a packet of roll-ups appearing at the bottom of an aisle. Initially it seemed to have fallen from a shelf, but was in fact propelled by an invisible force. Adelaide Paranormal Detectives co-founder Jessica Pulvirenti suggested the footage was genuine. “From what I’ve seen of the video, it doesn’t look like there are any wires around it,” she said. “It’s not falling, it looks like it’s been pushed.”
RAPUNZEL WANTS TO PIMP OUT HER ROOM
Photos: Getty, Thinkstock
BRAZIL A 12-year-old girl from Rio de Janeiro who has never cut her hair hopes to pocket £3,500 by selling her locks to the highest bidder. Natasha Moraes de Andrade’s hair stretches to her ankles, requiring her to spend half-an-hour each day brushing it and up to four hours a week washing it. Her hair is so long that her mother described her as “like a prisoner”, prompting the decision to chop it all off and cash in by selling it online. “I love my long hair and I’ll be sad when it’s gone. But it’s a pain looking after it,” she said. “I hope to sell it for £3,500 and refurbish my bedroom. I hope it can give me a new life.”
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100,000
Population of Japanese town Izumi-Sano, which could become Sonytown if it’s allowed to sell naming rights to sponsors
Roman coins, dating back to the third century, unearthed in Bath, making it one of the largest hoards ever discovered
Recycling taken out above Siberia?
‘FLYING DUSTBIN’ NOT AN ALIEN SPACECRAFT RUSSIA UFO-spotters may be disappointed after a hunk of metal that fell from the sky in Siberia turned out to have nothing to do with alien technology. The six-foot round metallic object, weighing about 200kg, which resembles a large dustbin, crashed in the outpost of Otradnesnky. Experts were called in to investigate the unidentified fragment but have yet to determine where it came from. The object appears to be made from ultra-strong titanium, but early theories that it could be part of a satellite or debris from rocket launches in Kazakhstan have been refuted. “The object found is not related to space technology. A final conclusion can be made after a detailed study of the object by experts,” the Russian Space Agency insisted.
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QUOTE OF THE WEEK You are allowed to do this stuff in your bedroom, but you don’t want the tape to come out. I am going to watch it tonight Simon Cowell offers his support to Tulisa after her sex-tape scandal
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TNT puts the world to rights
OURVIEW
COMMENT: CAROL DRIVER carol.driver@tntmagazine.com
“Too blue”: Phillips Idowu and Jessica Ennis show off new kit
Tulisa sex-tape leak backfires on Ultra arsehole Edwards
Photos: YouTube
MC comes off worse as N-Dubz singer goes public with apology
Whatever Justin Edwards was trying to achieve when he leaked a video of his ex-girlfriend Tulisa Contostavlos giving him a blowjob, it backfired royally. Instead of ruining her career or making him a stash of money, the MC has ended up looking like a wanker – shitty boyfriend material who no one should touch. Fair play to Tulisa for admitting it was her featured in the clip – although it was incredibly obvious (having watched the footage for a few minutes) it was, especially when an injunction was issued to websites to remove it. In an earnest message released on YouTube last week, the N-Dubz singer said she was devastated and heartbroken after what she considered to be a private moment with a partner was leaked for the world to see. “It’s a pretty tough time for me. I don’t think I should be the one to take the heat from him. He’s now sitting in silence pretending it’s not him; it is,” she says, holding up photos of them together when she was a teenager to prove they dated. “I’m not going to sit here and be violated by someone.” Too right. Edwards has so far kept schtum on the subject, simply tweeting: “To find the truth both sides of the story should be heard b4 passing judgement #thatisall.” But this has only bolstered support in Tulisa’s corner from fans and celebs, such as Simon Cowell. One Twitter message read: “Actually feel pretty bad for @officialtulisa now to be honest. MC Ultra is a proper scumbag for making money out of her.” What she did is no big deal – who hasn’t done similar or worse? Only difference is that her video went viral – so the apology isn’t needed. “Judge the both of us,” she says wisely. “But remember when you judge someone, it doesn’t define the person, it defines you.” Tulisa adds: “I’ve never been the type to sit and keep my mouth shut.” Edwards of all people should have known this – everyone else watching the footage did. » Agree or disagree? Was Tulisa right to apologise? letters@tntmagazine.com
WHY SO BLUE OVER NEW OLYMPICS KIT? So the new Team GB Olympics kit has been unveiled and in true British style there’s been more people voicing their disapproval than anything else. “Did someone forget to order the red dye,” @donaldjdonald hilariously tweeted, referring to the predominance of blue in the designs by Stella McCartney. “What a shame,” piped Paul from Truro on dailymail.co.uk. “Absolutely disgusted,” voiced another unhappy chap. On the official Facebook page where the kit was launched, one user wrote, using far too many exclamation marks than necessary: “Massive fail!!!!! These are not
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Get a grip people. It really doesn’t matter
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our national colours!!!!” Get a grip! Which hues our athletes wear while performing really doesn’t matter. More to the point, if people are up in arms over something so insignificant, we really have fallen at the first hurdle. Backing our team from the get-go would be much more conducive than seeing red. TNTMAGAZINE.COM
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How the future looks A new collection of essays predicts how we will live in 2050 WORDS TOM STURROCK
Looking decades into the future can be an exercise in futility, events regularly following a course that no one could have predicted. For example, according to the 1960s’ version of the 21st century, we should all be in flying cars by now, teleporting back and forth from the office while our robot butlers take care of the housework. That vision, alas, has not materialised. But it has not stopped us gazing into the crystal ball. Indeed, a new collection of essays, compiled in Megachange: The World In 2050, presents a fundamentally optimistic vision of the future, while acknowledging the challenges that must be overcome in the next 40 years. “The adaptability and ingenuity of people tends to be under-estimated,” Daniel Franklin, the co-editor of the book and The Economist’s executive editor, says of a forecast that, on balance, is sunnier than many might expect. “History also shows that some terrible turns for the worst can be taken and it would be foolish to ignore the possibility of events moving in the wrong direction. But nothing’s pre-ordained and that’s the point made repeatedly. “It doesn’t ignore the enormous challenges in the world – the questions about resources, the environment and security. But, very broadly, it’s an attempt to take a levelheaded look at how to adjust to these, how to address them, and also focus on the some of the exciting developments that hopefully help people tackle them.” One of the most acute challenges facing humanity, according to Franklin, is the inexorable and rapid increase in population. The current 7 billion will balloon to 9 billion by 2050, placing increased stress on resources in the areas of greatest growth. Franklin, though, insists it need not be a recipe for disaster, while acknowledging the sites driving this growth will need to be astutely managed. “Population expansion is going to happen and has to be dealt with. But we’ve already had quite rapid population expansion and it hasn’t coincided with an increase in war or 46
famine, despite the impression you might get. The reverse is actually true. The world produces enough food to feed itself – the problem is that it doesn’t always get to the right areas. “Half of those extra people will be in Africa, so it’s either a huge opportunity for that continent, having a large working-age population without as many dependents, or it’s potentially a huge problem.” This rise in population has the power to reshape the world, skewing its centre of gravity further eastward, the west’s influence likely to wane while Asia’s booms. “The balance of the world’s economy will likely be very different – Asia will be responsible for more than half the world’s production, which is interesting because, historically, that’s the way it was,” Franklin says. “That was the norm. It was only with the industrial revolution that Europe and America really surged up. That’s now being reversed.” Today, about half the world’s population lives in cities. That will go up to about 70 per cent by 2050, creating major sustainability challenges for town planners, as megacities struggle to make themselves liveable while still consuming resources efficiently. “Within those cities, especially when you consider a lot of the fastest-growing cities are going to be in Africa and Asia, there’s probably going to be a fair bit of shanty-town dwellings,” Franklin says. “These cities are likely to look more like Mumbai and Lagos than Paris, New York and London. So it will be a major challenge, something that’s going to require a great deal of ingenuity to make it work.” In terms of worst-case scenarios, Franklin is less concerned by the threat of global warming and the prospect of nuclear armageddon than the potential impact of exotic new diseases. Consider, for example, that, in 1980, no one had heard of Aids but, within a few years, it had become the number one killer of adult American males. “Diseases crop up all the time and globalisation, the
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Clockwise: augmented reality may be, well, a reality; disease control will be crucial; cities may look more like Mumbai than London
hyper-mobility of populations, makes it easier for diseases to spread faster,” Franklin says. “But there are new networks for detecting outbreaks as well, so there’s this battle between the rapid spread of disease and humanity being much better equipped to detect and stop it.” Hand-in-hand with the rise of developing countries and more densely urbanised populations will be the ubiquity and affordability of technologies that, to us today, seem completely space-age. “Technology is the most difficult area to forecast because there are, of course, inventions no one can imagine 40 years earlier,” Franklin says. “In 1970, could anyone have foreseen the internet or the way mobiles have changed our lives? But, in terms of the broad categories, there are some good bets. “The future belongs to biology and biotechnical sciences – those areas are in for a great period of discovery. A lot of it stems from our ability to now sequence DNA and apply to that parts of advanced computing, which opens doors to nanotechnology and vastly different ways to treat cancer and deliver things like personalised medicine.” Specifically, Franklin predicts advances in computer chips will revolutionise personal communication, to the point where data about anything a consumer encounters – events, products, people, transport routes, restaurants – will be instantaneously available to them. Facebook will look like a penny-farthing bicycle next to a private jet, a dirt track next to a super highway. “When it comes to information, the huge swatches of data that are now available, we’re yet to see the technology that really makes sense of that and makes the most of it,” Franklin says. “We’ll start to overlay that data in real-time, creating things like augmented reality – so you have access to data that’s embedded in things, and eventually embedded in our bodies. It’s just a matter of time before clever companies start to develop those kinds of services.”
BIG IDEAS NOT JUST MAKE BELIEVE The future may, in part, be shaped by dry demographics but there are, according to Franklin, some intensely sci-fi concepts that are knocking on the door of reality. “Some of the areas of wilder speculation include the discovery of alien life and the prospect of being able to resurrect extinct species,” he says, suggesting that, if ET is out there, it’s a matter of time before we get in touch. “We now have the means to detect alien life. The search is on and, if it exists, the possibility that we’ll find it in the next 40 years is quite high.” Equally, Franklin insists, a Jurassic Park-style reheating of dinosaurs may not be out of the question. “And scientists – a lot of scientists who work in this area – think it’s a possibility. Once you’re able to map DNA – we can already clone animals – that kind of situation isn’t that far off.”
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Ready to rumble: James Magnussen
MAGNUSSEN THE MAN TO WATCH IN LONDON SWIMMING Australia has named its 44 swimmers to compete at the London Olympics but 100m freestyle world champion James Magnussen will be the man shouldering the nation’s expectation. Magnussen, 20, is far and away Australia’s best medal prospect in the pool. His time in the 100m freestyle at the selection trials was the fastest by a swimmer not wearing a super-suit, which are now banned, and Magnussen has the world record, set by Brazil’s César Cielo, in his sights. “When you look back over the years at the great 100 freestylers, you look at the likes of Popov and Van den Hoogenband,” Magnussen said. “It’s definitely a legacy I want to leave and it’s something that I’m striving for.”
LEWIS URGE LEAGUE TO RESCUE TITANS RUGBY LEAGUE Queensland rugby league legend Wally Lewis has implored the NRL commission to ensure the debt-stricken Gold Coast Titans do not fold. A Federal Court in Brisbane ruled on Friday that a major construction company could begin wind-up proceedings against the organisation’s property arm next month. The club, which has run up record debts in excess of $30million, could find themselves on death row next month unless they can demonstrate their solvency within 30 days. Lewis is a legend of State of Orign and played 34 games for the Gold Coast before making his coaching debut with the club. “Can you imagine what the AFL will do if the Titans fold?,” Lewis warned. “They have to survive.” 48
Homeward bound: A matter of days after announcing his return to England to play for Super League club Sale, temperamental flyhalf Danny Cipriani produced one of his best performances for the Melbourne Rebels, helping them pip the Western Force 30-29
AFL PAYS TRIBUTE TO LATE JIMMY STYNES
BIG WEEK FOR ...
AUSTRALIAN RULES
Nathan Buckley was a champion player during 280 AFL games but we’re about to find out whether he can coach. Buckley has taken the reins at Collingwood, replacing veteran coach Mick Malthouse, and the pressure will be on straight away, with Collingwood smack-bang in the middle of their premiership window. And there’s a big test first up, the Pies facing Hawthorn on Friday.
The AFL season launched on a sombre note last week, chief executive Andrew Demetriou leading the tributes to Jimmy Stynes, who died last week at the age of 45. “It is fitting that I finish with more thoughts from Jim Stynes,” Demetriou said of the Irishman who confounded expectations to become a legend of the game and later, through his charity work, one of the codes most highly regarded characters off-field. “Jim said, ‘I have chosen the roads less travelled, with extraordinary results. The roads have led to excitement, achievements, rewards and the making of many great friendships.”
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QUOTES OF THE WEEK It would be great to have everyone behind me, but I’m realistic. Obviously people’s opinions are going to be divided Australian swimmer Nick D’Arcy is bound for the Olympics – he was dropped in 2008 after breaking a teammate’s jaw
England’s cricketers are under pressure
PREVIEW Time for Strauss and co to prove their mettle SRI LANKA V ENGLAND, FIRST TEST MONDAY-FRIDAY 4.30AM, SKY SPORTS 1 When you get up to go to work this week, you’ll be able to watch the English cricket team sweating it out on the pitches of Sri Lanka, where they need a series win to atone for their embarrassing loss to Pakistan. England, of course, are the world’s top-ranked Test side but have a welldocumented deficiency against spin and haven’t won a series on the sub-continent – taking in India, Pakistan and Sri Lanka
– for more than a decade. If they want to be remembered as a great side, rather than merely a very good one, they need to find a way to break that hoodoo. The pressure is on England to come away with a decent result – they don’t really want to be coming into a home summer, in which they will be hosting South Africa in a heavyweight title fight, having just lost to side ranked fifth and sixth in the world. England’s wobbles aside, they should be good enough to get the better of a Sri Lankan side that hasn’t fired a shot in Test cricket in recent times.
THE CHAT | Could be curtains for Haddin
They were playing a player the other night who refused to go on the pitch and the manager said he’ll never play again Alex Ferguson reminds Manchester City that, as far as desperate measures go, reinstating Carlos Tevez takes the cake
When you surf against Kelly there’s almost less pressure, because he’s meant to flog you No-name Australian surfer Tom Whitaker upset 10-time world champion Kelly Slater at an event in Margaret River
TV HIGHLIGHTS
Photos: Getty
FOOTBALL wicket-keeper Brad Haddin has Q Australian flown home from the West Indies for personal reasons. Is his international career over? should be. Haddin has already been replaced in the A Itlimited-overs side by Matthew Wade, who, in Haddin’s absence, will make his Test debut in Barbados next month. If Wade struggles, the window for Haddin to be recalled would remain theoretically open but Haddin will turn 35 in October and has been short of runs at Test level since the Ashes more than a year ago. In a side that is regenerating under a young captain, it seems like a no-brainer to pick a gloveman who is nearly 10 years younger, in decent form with the bat and actually has a superior first-class record.
Benfica v Chelsea Champions League quarter-final Tuesday 7pm, Sky Sports 2
AUSTRALIAN RULES Hawthorn v Collingwood Bumper first-round clash Friday 9.30am, ESPN
TENNIS Miami Masters final All over: Brad Haddin
Another gripping finale beckons Sunday 6pm, Sky Sports 3 TNTMAGAZINE.COM
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TNT puts the world to rights
COMMENT: TOM STURROCK
Blackburn’s Fabrice Muamba; (inset) Carlos Tevez shares the love
Football’s feel-good moment an exercise in opportunism Money talks and bullshit walks when it comes to support for Muamba
» Are you moved by the outpouring of support for Fabrice Muamba? letters@tntmagazine.com 50
AAMER SWIMMING IN MURKY WATERS Teenage Pakistani fast bowler Mohammad Aamer is serving a fiveyear ban for spot-fixing. Is he a cheat? Or himself a victim? That all depends on whether you believe his account. Last week, Aamer’s first interview since being banned was published. In it, he flagellated himself for agreeing to bowl no-balls on demand but also insisted he had essentially been blackmailed by Salman Butt, Pakistan’s captain, and Mazhar Majeed, the shady go-between busted in the News Of The World sting.
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Cricket fans would like to believe Aamer
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Cricket fans would like to believe him – to believe he was a teenage innocent manipulated by senior figures rather than a cheat hoping to prosper. This would significantly mitigate his crime, making it possible to welcome a precocious talent back into the game and perhaps even justify an easing of his ban. Cricket fans would like to believe him. But that doesn’t mean he’s telling the truth.
Photos: Getty
Since Fabrice Muamba collapsed two weekends ago, there has been an outpouring of support, interpreted in some quarters as the ‘football community’ coming together. Football’s solidarity amid sadness has, we are told, reminded us all of our ‘shared humanity’. This is hand-holding, self-serving nonsense – football forfeited that kind of influence, that lofty providence, many moons ago. This is not to diminish sympathy for Muamba’s family or goodwill toward the player during his recovery. No doubt, the individual players who have tweeted or worn a T-shirt wishing him well are genuine. But attempts to stitch it all together, to get all gooey while extrapolating it into a deeply moving example of football’s mass-market, sponsor-friendly worthiness, seem opportunistic – a smash and grab for warm and fuzzy PR. How many times have we been exhorted to “pray for Muamba”? Or to “thank God” for his survival? Should we sacrifice a goat while we’re at it? These redundant voodoo fantasies merely licence football to peddle empty gestures, its stock in trade, while congratulating itself and insisting its moral compass is in perfect working order. Instead of thanking God, wouldn’t it make more sense to celebrate the expertise of the professionals who saved Muamba’s life? Here’s an idea: if football is all about coming together, solidarity and shared humanity, maybe it should pass the hat around and kick in a few million bucks to fund research and development for the treatment of heart disease, validating those who saved Muamba’s life and hopefully helping them save thousands more. Tweeting and T-shirts are all well and good – and prayer is, conveniently, free – but if the football community wants credibility as a caring, sharing brotherhood of man – rather than a bunch of self-interested actors fleetingly and expediently aligned for mutual profit – they should open their wallets. Instead of outdoing each other gushing about Muamba, they should find the moral imagination to leverage his misfortune for the greater good.
tom.sturrock@tntmagazine.com
TNTMAGAZINE.COM
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Old Cats, any new tricks? Geelong confounded the doubters last year – can they do it again? WORDS TOM STURROCK
Sure, the new AFL season officially kicked off over the weekend, with the stand-alone curtain-raiser between the Sydney Swans and their new cross-town rivals, the Greater Western Sydney Giants. But all the pomp and pageantry of the AFL welcoming its new expansion side will pale in comparison when the season starts with a full compliment on Thursday, when Richmond host Carlton at the MCG. Any forecast is fraught with risk. There’s the big three – Collingwood, Hawthorn and Geelong – who have split the past four flags between them – and the two new kids on the block – Gold Coast and GWS – who will likely finish last and second-last. There’s really not much separating the other 13 sides but here’s our best attempt to put them in order.
Cats
Blues
Demons
Their gun midfield means they’ll play finals for the fourth year in a row but the Blues still lack the depth or focal point in attack required to leapfrog any of the top three. Key player: Chris Judd – the era’s most complete on-baller. Prediction: 4th – the next step will prove hard to take.
The kids are impressive but still raw, and their senior players offer precious little in the way of leadership. More progress was expected but they’ve spent a few years treading water. Key player: Mitch Clark – on big bucks, so needs to deliver. Prediction: 14th – a sixth year out of finals awaits.
Bombers
Dockers
James Hird’s improving young side will be looking to consolidate this year after limping into last year’s final series and being belted by their arch-rivals, Carlton. Key player: Jobe Watson – needs help from the young mids. Prediction: 8th – another year of finals exposure.
Fremantle are notoriously unpredictable – mostly in a bad way – but there’s enough talent and experience to suggest new coach Ross Lyon has something to work with. Key player: Matthew Pavlich – should be left to play forward. Prediction: 6th – barring injuries, they have a top-eight list.
Bulldogs
Eagles
After three years in the top four, the Doggies slid to 10th last year and a period of rebuilding looms. It’s hard to see where their goals will come from, meaning it could get messy. Key player: Adam Cooney – his dodgy knee is a big worry. Prediction: 13th – will get worse before it gets better.
Last year, the Eagles came from nowhere to make a preliminary final. If they can be thereabouts again, while developing their youngsters, it will be a successful season. Key player: Josh Kennedy – will anchor the Eagles’ attack. Prediction: 5th – losing Mark LeCras for the year hurts.
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Everyone said they were too old last year but the Cats responded by winning another flag. In their best 22, 10 are 28 or older – the loss of Brad Ottens and Cameron Ling may tell. Key player: Tom Hawkins – time for Tomahawk to swing. Prediction: 3rd – still powerful; who’d write them off?
Crows Have developed a nucleus of players with between 50 and 200 games that can propel them up the ladder. Looked fit, aggressive and well-drilled in winning the pre-season comp. Key player: Patrick Dangerfield – matchwinner in the making. Prediction: 7th – have the hard edge to make it into finals.
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Photos: Getty
Clockwise: Gary Ablett; Chris Judd; Lance Franklin
Giants
Power
The league’s newest side will cop some horrific beltings in their first year. It’s not the end of the world, provided their kids show they have what it takes. Key player: Tom Scully – pressure is on the star recruit. Prediction: 18th – will do well to win a couple of games.
Port Adelaide are a proud club and might yet surprise but they look like they’re in a hole and simply don’t have the playing list to climb out. Not this year, anyway. Key player: Travis Boak – Port’s only blue-chip midfielder. Prediction: 16th – a fifth straight year without finals looms.
Hawks
Saints
They went within an inch of beating Collingwood in last year’s epic preliminary final. They over-achieved when they won the flag in 2008 but are now cherry-ripe to go again. Key player: Lance Franklin – simply unstoppable on his day. Prediction: Premiers – boast the right mix of glamour and grit.
This crop of Saints looked like breaking a premiership-drought now spanning 45 years but they played three grand finals – two in 2010 – without winning one. Could be curtains. Key player: Nick Riewoldt – still carries the can in attack. Prediction: 10th – rely too heavily on the same old heads.
Kangaroos
Suns
There’s no guarantee they’ll emerge from the mid-ladder logjam. There are a few guns and some impressive kids, but that might not be enough to take the next step. Key player: Daniel Wells – the sparkle in a blue-collar side. Prediction: 11th – a year without finals will be a failure.
In their second season, the Suns will expect their young guns to take more responsibility but it’s a young side still very much in the development phase. Hopefully fewer thrashings. Key player: Gary Ablett – the stand-out in a developing side. Prediction: 17th – still too inexperienced to challenge.
Lions
Swans
After some disastrously short-sighted list management, the Lions are on the right track but can expect more pain given they’ve had to go back to square one. Nowhere near finals. Key player: Jon Brown – the Lions lack teeth without him. Prediction: 15th – must plough games into their kids.
They punch above their weight thanks to resilient veterans and consistent contributions from lesser lights. Well-balanced and committed, the Swans are unlikely to bottom-out. Key player: Adam Goodes – the 300-gamer is still a star. Prediction: 9th – vying for the last few spots in the eight.
Magpies
Tigers
They were mugged by Geelong in last year’s grand final but have quality on every line, and Nathan Buckley replacing Mick Malthouse as coach shouldn’t rock the boat too much. Key player: Scott Pendlebury – all class in the engine room. Prediction: Runners-up – every chance to go all the way.
It’s been 10 seasons since Richmond played finals and this batch of young Tigers are made of the right stuff but have yet to show the consistency required to make the top half. Key player: Dustin Martin – could be the next big thing. Prediction: 12th – will show glimpses before falling short. TNTMAGAZINE.COM
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TRAVEL LATE DEALS | HOTSHOTS | TRAVEL TIPS | TOP FIVE | TOURS | BIG TRIP IMAGE OF THE WEEK
CROWDS IN KABUL Afghans gather at the Sakhi Shrine in Kabul to celebrate Nowruz, the Afghan New Year. Nowruz is the country’s biggest festival.
Photos: Getty, Nick Dalton, Venice Kayak
INSIDE
CAVE MEN /58
QUIRKY EUROPE /66
RITE OF PASSAGE /72
Get flushed down The Toilet, slide through The Letterbox, then go down The Wormhole in Brecon Beacons, Wales.
Why walk around a city when you can take the beer bike or the vodka tram? Check out our favourite unusual tours of Europe.
An Anzac Day tour can give you a glimpse into Gallipoli’s haunting past, but also helps you to discover Turkey’s present. TNTMAGAZINE.COM
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TRAVELDIARY Laura Chubb
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Colourful parades at Mewar Festival
ACTING TRAVEL EDITOR
MAKE YOUR MARK English Heritage has revealed that 70,000 listed buildings – churches, monuments, anything considered important to the country’s heritage and history – were damaged by graffiti and vandalism in the last year.
MEWAR FESTIVAL Udaipur, India The city welcomes spring with traditional Rajasthani song and dance, colourful processions, and fireworks displays. The festival coincides 25-27 with Gangaur, one of Rajasthan’s most important celebrations, and culminates in a parade of brightly dressed ladies carrying images of the goddess Gauri towards the scenic Lake Pichola, where specially decorated boats await. MAR
WHY: The Gangaur festival is particularly important to Rajasthan’s women, who gather to honour Gauri, the goddess of purity. Dressed in their finest clothes, and carrying richly adorned clay idols of Hindu gods and goddesses, they provide the stunning colour to the coinciding Mewar Festival.
DO IT BECAUSE: It’s the perfect way to experience the religious fervour that Udaipur is known for, as participation is encouraged throughout the community. But while Gangaur represents the pious part of the people, Mewar then brings on the party.
EUROPEAN GAY SKI WEEK
GOLDEN MASK FESTIVAL
Hundreds of skiers from across the globe hit the 24-31 slopes for disco, drag shows and a decent dose of après-ski.
Russia’s annual theatre festival invites performances 27 comprising drama, ballet, opera, musicals and more from all over the country. Catch it until April 15.
L’Alpe d’Huez, France MAR
europeangayskiweek.com
SEMANA SANTA Antigua, Guatemala
During this huge Holy Week (or Easter week) celebration, 30 Antigua’s incense-filled streets are covered with intricate carpets of coloured sawdust and flower petals. Each day, clad in bright purple robes, people take turns carrying floats bearing statues of Christ, the Virgin Mary and the apostles through town. Until April 8. MAR
aroundantigua.com
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udaipur.org.uk
Moscow, Russia MAR
goldenmask.ru
RIVER CITY BREWERS FESTIVAL Memphis, US
Craft brewing in the US is becoming quite the scene. 31 This festival honours microbrews to the tune of live bands, so grab your souvenir mug, snag some free food samples, and get to tasting an array of regional, national and import beers while tapping your toes. MAR
rivercitybrewersfestival.com
Photos: Thinkstock
According to heritage minister John Penrose: “When historic buildings and sites fall victim to vandalism, damage and theft ... the thing that’s been stolen or damaged is literally irreplaceable.” But how about this: couldn’t the marks left by vandals also have a place in our heritage and history? Take Maes Howe, in the Orkney Islands. This ancient burial chamber – which predates the Pyramids by 3000 years – was broken into by Vikings in 1153. The axe-swinging brutes graffitied Maes Howe with runes that you can still read today, giving us an amazing insight into that era. And while some inscriptions are the runic equivalent of the scrawlings of today’s spotty yoof (“Thorni fucked. Helgi carved”), some have helped historians confirm events of the past. So, what insights into our soonto-become-ancient-history have vandals branded on to the worldrenowned sites of today? Well, a couple of years ago, “When the cat’s away, the rats will play” was spraypainted on to the face of Rio’s Christ the Redeemer. Bit cryptic that. You’d almost think these dudes didn’t really have anything to say. Come to think of it, the number of ‘Tash n’ Ryan woz ere’s that I’ve seen scratched on to priceless pieces of history might not give that great an impression of this era. I’ve never understood the point of these messages, seeing as you’re unlikely to travel a few thousand miles to readmire your handiwork ever again. The moral? If you’ve not got anything interesting to graffiti, then how about you don’t graffiti at all.
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PAY OR PRAY Budget airline Ryanair has caused controversy again, this time over its policy of charging passengers £10 extra to sit next to emergency exits. The seats are considered a premium option because they afford extra legroom. But the Irish Aviation Authority (IAA) is concerned that the surcharge has left these seats empty on scores of Ryanair flights – as travellers opt to save money – which is against its rules. “The IAA is in discussion with Ryanair as to how [the surcharge] policy conforms to IAA requirements,” the authority confirmed. A spokesman for the airline said: “Ryanair complies with all mandatory safety directives.”
EUROPE GETS CHEAP Now is the time to bag a bargain European break, if new research by TripAdvisor is anything to go by. According to the review site, hotel prices in some destinations have plummeted by almost 50 per cent. In Portugal’s popular sun and sea spot Albufeira, for example, nightly rates are down from £82 in 2011 to £47. Prices in Barcelona have plunged 20 per cent since last year, while a night in Pamplona – which stages the ‘running of the bulls’ – is around just £14 now. Upsides to the downturn, eh?
BOND TAKES BOGNOR Much-maligned Brit seaside resort Bognor Regis is enjoying some unprecedented popularity after it was announced scenes from the new James Bond film will be shot there. Previous Bond movies have been filmed on location in the likes of Jamaica, Brazil and Thailand, so the decision to bring 007 to Bognor suggests times are hard in the film industry, too. But it’s good news for this unglamorous getaway in West Sussex, at least, where hotel bookings are said to have leapt by 40 per cent since the news broke.
NOT SO HAPPY EASTER Roll on the Easter holiday – or maybe not, if planned strikes by baggage handlers go ahead. Members of the GMB union are being balloted on whether to strike over the long weekend after management announced changes to shift patterns for workers at Swissport – a company that employs baggage handlers at Stansted. Swissport staff handle 11 airlines at the airport, including Monarch, Ryanair and Thomson Airways. The result of the ballot will be announced on March 29.
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EAT, DRINK, SLEEP Felin Fach Griffin gastropub offers local fare in a rustic setting. Dishes start at about £16. (eatdrinkleep.ltd.co.uk)
The descent: are you brave enough to go caving?
The Bridge Café in Brecon is more of a bistro, with veg-rich evening meals from £9. (bridgecafe.co.uk) Skirrid Mountain Inn dates back to the Norman Conquest. There’s a selection of real ales from £2.50. (skirridmountaininn.co.uk) The Angel Inn is a great place for a beer after caving or a waterfalls walk. Pints from £2.50. (theangelinn.pizco.com) The River Café is a neat Italian B&B on the Wye. Local beer and good fish and pasta are on hand. From £35pp B&B. (wyevalleycanoes.co.uk) A Victorian farmhouse in a lovely setting, at Brecon Youth Hostel rooms sleep up to 10 and you can self-cater. From about £20pp. (yha.org.uk)
Brecon Beacons WALES
GETTING THERE Trains from London Paddington to Abergavenny, changing at Newport, cost from £62.50 return (nationalrail.co.uk). The X43 bus connects Abergavenny and Brecon, taking about an hour. Tickets from £4.50 return. (stagecoachbus.com)
Brecon Beacons
WALES Cardiff
Black Mountain Activities is a provider of high quality Outdoor Pursuits
• canoe hire • mountain bike hire • rock climbing • gorge adventure walking • high level ropes • raft building • kayaking • archery • clay shooting • caving • white water rafting • land carting • orienteering • hill walking
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UKTRIP
Cave men Get flushed down The Toilet, slide through The Letterbox, then go down The Wormhole in Wales
Photos: Nick Dalton
WORDS NICK DALTON
I’m on my knees, I’m soaked, and it’s pitch black. I’ve just gone down The Toilet, a hole in the rocky floor of a cave, and now I’m trying to flush myself clear. There is light at the end of the tunnel, literally, albeit only a dull glow from our guide’s head torch. But I can’t really focus on it as the space is so tight, it’s impossible to hold my helmeted head up, and my legs are under water. This, as unlikely as it may seem, is caving for beginners. I’ve already been through The Wormhole, a slit in the rock so shallow that it involved a commando-like stomach shuffle for almost 10m, head sideways. The Letterbox – which, I think, speaks for itself – is still to come. As a first-timer, I thought, rather foolishly, that I’d be in for a gentle start. But I’ve barely managed to stand upright during the several hours I’ve spent in 2.5km Porth Yr Ogof, near Pontneddfechan, heart of Wales’s Waterfall Country. This is adventure the Welsh way, one of many opportunities to get wet and wild in the Brecon Beacons National Park. Cheery, laconic guide Dave only guffawed when I mentioned that one of the wellies I’d been given had a large gash in it. It soon becomes clear that my feet would have become just as wet if I had pristine boots, just not as quickly. The Brecon Beacons are like that; friendly but no nonsense. This is outdoor heaven, but one where no one tries to make you feel that this is a province for experts only. The Brecons sweep 65km across southern Wales, from north of Cardiff all the way to Swansea. It’s unusual for a national park in that it’s not just wilderness; among the mountains (including Pen y Fan, south Wales’s highest peak at 886m) are towns such as Abergavenny and Brecon. Adventures include canyoning (like white-water rafting, without the raft), gorge walking (a less extreme, but no drier, form of canyoning), river running (swimming through rapids) and rock climbing. All can be tackled by anyone, if you’ve got the nerve. During the cave adventure, I feel the oppressive weight of the huge shelf of rock that keeps the roof from falling in, edge through tiny gaps as the sounds of other cavers echo eerily, and emerge, blinking, into the misty rain. The cave entrance is a mystical sight; the river crashing over rocks through a narrow gorge, then disappearing into what looks as if it should be a dragon’s lair.
Rather drier is a river expedition on the Wye. The sun is high in a blue autumn sky as we’re handed our Canadian canoe at Wye Valley Canoes’ base next to Glasbury’s stone bridge. After several inelegant circles to get the hang of it, we point downstream, paddling only to keep us central on the winding river. We see kingfishers darting across the water, then find ourselves bouncing through rapids, all with a backdrop of the Black Mountains. By lunchtime we’ve managed 8km to pretty Hay-on-Wye on the English border. Our arms are aching and we’re ready for the shuttle back – and glad that we didn’t choose the full-day, 16km trip.
“
This is adventure the Welsh way
”
Even walking is an adventure here. From Porth Yr Ogof, I take the 6km Four Waterfalls path along the river, up steep steps, down forest trails and past several crashing falls before reaching Sgwd yr Eira (Falls of Snow). I clamber along the steep-sided muddy bank, spray soaking me, and then disappear on the ledge behind the foaming waters. Another day I leave the Waterfall Centre in Pontneddfechan (opposite the Angel Inn) and climb the steep, muddy path following the River Hepste for another handful of falls. These walks can be managed alone, but guides are available – although they’re used more for exposed mountaintop hikes. The amazing thing is that, in the Brecons – tucked inside our very own UK – I experience things that I never NEXT WEEK thought I would, from the tops of The Lancaster mountains to deep below them. witch trial trail And these are experiences open to everyone. Great Britain, indeed. ❚ A half-day’s caving is £55pp with Adventure Britain, which also offers canyoning and more adventurebritain.com Canoeing from £20pp for a half-day with Wye Valley Canoe Centre wyevalleycanoes.co.uk More on Brecon Beacons at breconbeaconstourism.co.uk
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Three nights in Venice is £299 with Flight Centre
DEAL OF THE WEEK CANARY ISLAND
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Seven nights in Fuerteventura is £129pp with lowcostholidays.com (0800 1116271). Includes threestar, self-catering accommodation and return flights from London Luton. Departs May 8.
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PARIS A three-night break is £379pp with Flight Centre (08444 999284; flightcentre.co.uk), quoting reference PARLONPAC12. Includes accommodation, city tour and return travel from London St Pancras. Book by March 31; departs April 6. SAILING GREECE An eight-day Bodrum to Mykonos tour is £411pp (save 25 per cent or 2-for-1) with Travel Talk (0208 0998852; traveltalktours.com). Visiting Kos, Santorini and more. Includes seven nights on a private boat, some meals, tour leader and crew. Excludes flights, port tax and local payment. Book by March 31; departs May 27. VENICE Three nights is £299pp with Flight Centre (08444 999284; flightcentre.co.uk), quoting reference VCELONPAC2. Includes B&B accommodation and return flights from London Gatwick. Book by March 31; valid for travel throughout May 2012.
> £500 EGYPT & JORDAN A 16-day Egypt and Jordan tour is £554pp (save 25 per cent or 2-for-1) with Travel Talk (0208 0998852; traveltalktours. com). Visiting Cairo, Giza, Pyramids, Wadi Rum, Petra, Dead Sea and more. Includes accommodation, some meals, ferry travel between Egypt and Jordan, guide and more. Excludes flights and local payment. Book by March 31; departs April 21. SRI LANKA A seven-night trip is £659pp with Travelbag (0871 7034240; travelbag.co.uk). Includes accommodation in Wadduwa and return flights. Book by April 16; valid for travel between May 1 and June 30. EUROPE A 10-day tour is £785pp (save £74pp) with Contiki (0845 0750990; contiki.com/lates). Visiting Paris, Venice, Amsterdam and more. Includes accommodation and local transport. Excludes flights. Book by April 2; departs June 5.
DAILY TRAVEL DEALS GO TO tntmagazine.com/travel/latedeals where new travel deals are updated daily. There are more than 30 deals live at any time. Also sign up for TNT’s weekly travel newsletter, which will be emailed to you every Wednesday with the most up-to-date deals and guides to over 170 destinations. Sign up at tntmagazine.com/travelemail.
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EGYPT A nine-day tour of Egypt is £216pp (save 25 per cent or 2-for-1) with Travel Talk (0208 0998852; traveltalktours.com). Visiting Cairo, Giza, Pyramids, Sphinx, Aswan and more. Includes accommodation, some meals, guides and more. Excludes flights and local payment. Book by March 31; departs June 2. IBIZA A seven-night break to Ibiza is £197pp with easyJet Holidays (easyJet.com/holidays; 0843 1041000). Includes self-catering accommodation and return flights from London Stansted. Departs May 8. ALGARVE A seven-night break to Portugal’s Algarve is £199pp with lowcostholidays.com (0800 1116271). Includes all-inclusive accommodation and return flights from London Stansted. Departs April 13. ANZAC A three-day Western Front tour is £179pp (save £20) with First Festival Travel (firstfestivaltravel. com; 0207 4716417), using discount code TNTWF2012. Visiting Belgium and France. Includes return transport from London, accommodation, breakfasts, entry fees, guides, and memorial services. Departs April 23. PRAGUE A three-night break in Prague is £189pp with Travelbag (0871 7034240; travelbag.co.uk). Includes four-star, B&B accommodation and return flights from London Gatwick. Departs April 30.
£250 – £500
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HOTSHOTS
RUTH ROXANNE BOARD Talks travel photography
WINNER
HOT TIPS: Editing You’ve taken your shot and that’s it, right? If only it was that simple! Many photographers neglect to edit their images afterwards. This is especially important in the digital age when you can shoot off hundreds of frames in an hour. When editing, you are not just looking for those shots that are in focus and have the right framing
WINNER
– that gets done in your first edit. Second time round, study your images for the things that make them interesting. They may jump out at you straight away, or it may need a second look later on to discover what they are. The different, the surprising and the idiosyncratic can make a good scene into a great image.
RUNNER-UP
BUNDI CRICKETERS Matt Paish, Wiltshire, UK
WHY IT WORKS I like the way this image captures the unrestrained joy of youth: their smiles, the posing and their evident friendship all bring the image to life. Although the subjects are colourful and dynamic, that shouldn’t distract from the skill of the photographer in getting this shot. The framing, the perspective and the timing of this photo, in particular, elevates it above the average. It’s a great feel-good image.
RUNNER-UP RELAXING Ruta Mackelaite, London, UK
WHY IT WORKS It’s the simplicity of this image that makes it work so incredibly well. It is a simple set-up, devoid of a point of reference, and this results in an enigmatic shot. Thanks to the framing, the subject’s location and situation is a mystery but perhaps that’s the point: don’t ask questions, just take a seat under the blue sky and grab a beer. Sounds good to me! A THREE-DAY TOUR OF SCOTLAND AND A PHOTOGRAPHY COURSE Upload your images to tntmagazine.com/hotshots First prize is a three-day tour of Scotland for two worth £218 from Haggis Adventures (haggisadventures.com). Must be taken within three months of receiving prize letter. The runner-up wins a £60 photography course voucher from Nigel Wilson Photography (photographycourses.org.uk).
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TOP FIVE
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BEST DIVING HOLIDAYS
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Fin-tastic: dive with dolphins in Brazil
FERNANDO DE NORONHA, BRAZIL
This archipelago of 21 volcanic islands and islets is a tranquil, off-the-beatenpath dive spot lying 200 miles off the coast of Brazil. Calm waters, a rich variety of marine life and a host of well-preserved shipwrecks, including the Brazilian Navy Ipiranga Corvette V17, make it one of the best places to scuba in South America – so it was an easy choice for our top spot. Once underwater, divers enjoy crystal-clear waters with visibility of up to an impressive 45 metres, perfect for spotting dolphins, turtles, stingrays and coloured tropical fish. The island chain makes up part of the mid-Atlantic ridge, an underwater mountain range stretching 15,000km through the Atlantic Ocean. Formerly a volcanic cone, its base lies 756 metres below the surface, so you’ll get to explore fascinating volcanic rock, caverns and coral formations. As both Brazil’s first marine park and a Unesco World Heritage Site, more than 70 per cent of the island is protected. This includes tourist favourite Dolphins Bay, the world’s 62 00
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oldest, largest school of the mammals and a breeding ground for the acrobatic spinner dolphin (we kid you not). Nearby Projeto Tamar (tamar. org.br), a Brazilian environmental organisation, is worth checking out. Get involved, as the conservation centre is a good spot to witness cute, newly hatched hawksbill and green turtles take their first trip into the ocean. And if you’re looking for a few more activities above the surface, you can go horse riding, dune buggying and surfing on the island chain, earning Fernando de Noronha the title “Hawaii of Brazil.” What’s more, you, thankfully, won’t have to fight with hordes of other tourists for a relaxing dive trip – the secluded island promotes “sustainable tourism”, and only allows 420 visitors at a time. You’ll be able to enjoy its incredible marine life and natural wonders in peace. The best time to visit is in the low season between April and November, when accommodation is cheaper. fernando-de-noronha.org
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GREAT BLUE HOLE, BELIZE
Jacques Cousteau put this place on the map in 1971, when he took his famous Calypso ship here, declaring it one of the world’s best diving sites. Today, divers continue to flock to the karst-eroded sinkhole, formed when the ceiling of an underground cave collapsed. It now boasts a collection of intricate limestone stalactites and wall formations. Book a dive package with Aqua Scuba Centre from £126. aquascubabelize.com
Photos: Thinkstock
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ANDAMAN SEA, THAILAND
The Surin and Similan islands make up a chain of 14 beautiful uninhabited islets in the Andaman Sea, making them Thailand’s best spot for diving. The remote areas are famed for virtually untouched reefs and exceptional visibility, as well as a host of colourful fish, mantas and turtles. Nearby Richelieu Rock is a favourite with the more experienced diver for its purple corals and visiting whale sharks. Introductory courses start at about £33 with Crystal Dive (crystaldive.com). tourismthailand.org
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RED SEA, EGYPT
‘Victorian landmark’
At the southern tip of the Sinai Peninsula in the Red Sea lies the Ras Mohammed National Park, full of rich coral reefs, underwater caves and thousands of species of fish. Sweeping desert landscapes dotted with gazelles surround this diver’s paradise. The waters, home to the SS Thistlegorm wreckage, are believed to be one of the few remaining sewagefree dive spots. Packages from £92 with Divers International. diversintl.com
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MOLOKINI CRATER, HAWAII
Just a short boat ride away from tourist hotspot Maui lies this uninhabited islet, formed along the rim of an ancient, partially submerged volcanic crater. It’s ideal for divers of all skill levels – the crescent moon shape protects beginners against powerful currents, while the more experienced can head to the back of the crater, which sinks to an ear-popping 350ft. Expect to spot eels, mantas and dolphins, as well as one of Hawaii’s most pristine hard coral reefs. Packages from £107 with Lahaina Divers. lahainadivers.com
BUXTON PALACE OVERVIEW This is a commanding Victorian landmark perched high in the spa town of Buxton, on the edge of the Peak District National Park. Just across the road are popular restaurants and pubs that ooze with warm northern charm, and the hotel has beauty treatment rooms and a modest health club. WOW FACTOR The buffet breakfast is everything you want to wake up to – think meats and cheeses, crusty breads, fruits, yoghurts and pastries. Though on a busy Sunday morning, the wheels seem to fall off the food production line. ROOMS The oversized rooms make even the king-size beds appear small; you could waltz freely in the open space, perhaps to the tune of the creaky floors. Also, the front rooms afford great views of the town. But ‘historical’ is no excuse for tatty and unwashed. The curtains are grimy and the place needs a good lick of paint. BILL PLEASE A double room with breakfast from £79pn.
Palace Road, Buxton, Derbyshire, SK17 6AG barcelo-hotels.co.uk
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TRAVELTIPS
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Making a splash: go whale-watching on Cape Cod
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If your tip is printed, you’ll win vouchers (worth up to £60) for entry for two into one of No.1 Traveller’s airport lounges at Heathrow, Gatwick or Stansted. With complimentary food and drinks, free Wi-Fi and newspapers and magazines, your trip will get off to a flying start. See No1Traveller.com Tweet your tip to @tntmagazine.com Email traveltips@tntmagazine.com Text TNT and your message to 81707* *Messages cost 25p each + standard network rate. 18+ billpayers only. Send STOP to end. Number may show on bill. A2B 08700460138
READERS’ TIPS
YOU ASKED FOR IT... LAURA LINDSAY FROM LONELY PLANET
girlfriend and I are heading off Q My to Greece in June for two weeks and we would love to visit the Ionian Islands, Athens and Santorini. What would be the easiest/ cheapest way to get to Santorini from Zante or Kefalonia? We’ll probably travel back to London from Santorini. Le Perr, via email
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venture out around New England while I’m there. Can you recommend where to go, what to see, and where’s good to stay outside Boston for one night? I’ll have a car. Simon Haggett, via email will be a great time to head out to A May the coast and enjoy the weather. Visit the stunning peninsula of Cape Cod and escape city life on one of its beaches. Start off at the picturesque Sandwich, one of the first towns you’ll reach on the Cape. The historic village, complete with swan pond and mill, has that quaint, rural feel that seems miles from the city. There’s a great beach here, although the water will probably be too chilly to swim in. Continue east on the peninsula to Chatham, where there’s great seafood and art galleries. Finally, make sure to go right to the edge of the Cape until you hit Provincetown. This is one of Cape Cod’s most buzzing spots, and a great place to spend the evening. There are plenty of quirky options for places to stay in Provincetown, too. If you’ve got a bit of extra cash, you can even stay in a lighthouse (racepointlighthouse.net). Check out what’s on at Provincetown theatre (provincetowntheater.org) and local art at Provincetown Art Association and Museum (www.paam.org). Whilst you’re here, explore the ruggest coastline with great walks, and there’s also chance for a bit of whale-watching.
APP HAPPY A lot of guidebooks are out of date when it comes to transport networks, so apps are best. Download useful travel apps, such as transport maps and city guides, before you go and save yourself both time and money. Claire Dodd, via Facebook Are apps better than guidebooks? Let us know on letters@tntmagazine.com – and download the new TNT app from tntmagazine.com/apps
A LONELY PLANET GUIDE
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Photos: Thinkstock
the mainland is slap-bang in the A Because middle of these two groups of islands, the transport links inevitably go via the mainland. I would recommend altering your itinerary to suit this by flying into Zante (you can fly from Gatwick direct with Thomas Cook or easyJet). Using Zante as your base, from here you can explore the Ionian Islands travelling on one of the two daily ferries to Kefalonia (1.5 hours) and then on to Lefkada (one hour). Then hop on a flight from Zante to Athens (one hour) or travel on the KTEL bus service for the six-hour ride to Athens (which goes via a boat to Kyllini on the mainland; budget an additional £7-£10 for this). From Athens, there are numerous ferry services to Santorini from both ports at Rafina and Piraeus. The high-speed service will take around five hours, but if budget is the priority, opt for the slower nine-hour service, which is approximately half the price. There is no question that this is a complicated sequence of journeys, so my advice would be to opt for a relaxing two-week break around one of these groups of islands, and save the other for a later trip.
be spending four days in Boston Q I’ll at the end of May and would like to
JUST DO IT TIP That daytrip may cost OF THE a lot of money. But, to do WEEK it some other time will require another plane ticket, etc. On the whole, “I’ll do it again sometime in the future” often doesn’t apply. So just do it! Katherine Rushton, via Facebook
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WHERE IN THE WORLD?
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A TRIP FOR TWO TO BATH & STONEHENGE
Been somewhere good lately? Send us a horizontal photo of yourself with a copy of TNT from anywhere around the world and, if we print it, you’ll win a trip for two to Bath and Stonehenge with Anderson Tours, valued at £104! » Email your pictures to ontheroad@ tntmagazine.com along with your name, where you’re from and where the photo was taken, or see tntmagazine.com/world. Files must be at least 500Kb.
PONTE VECCHIO, FLORENCE Don Latimer, from New Zealand
BEST / WORST TRIP
THE TRAVELLER
CHARLOTTE LOWRY, 25
JANA VUJIC, 21
Windsor, England
Kristinehamn, Sweden
BEST My friends and I took a road trip from New York to Miami, stopping along the way in a ton of places, such as North Carolina, Philadelphia and Atlantic City. It was different to any trip I’ve been on before, because I normally just go to one place. I work for a car hire company, too, so I was able to get a big van for us. WORST I stayed in a villa in Cyprus and there were a lot of Brits on holiday there just looking for Irish bars. It wasn’t a very cultural experience.
Most memorable travel experience? Honestly, the trip I’m on now is a pretty memorable one. I just moved to London and it has been really exciting for me, going from such a small town to an amazing big city. London has everything you could need – there’s way more things to do for fun and loads of new people to meet. Essential travel item? A list of things for packing. I always forget everything that I need the most, so it helps to at least try to be organised.
» Tell us your best/worst trips, email laura.chubb@tntmagazine.com
SPLASHING OUT
Photos: Getty; TNT
WATER-FIGHT FESTIVAL The Sarojin luxury boutique hotel in Phuket is offering packages to help you celebrate Songkran, Thailand’s New Year water-fight festival, on from April 13-15. Stay six nights and pay for five, or stay 12 nights and pay for 10, from about £266pn (sarojin.com), based on two sharing. Includes all-day breakfast with sparkling wine. Valid until April 15.
THE INSIDER
HEATHER NICHOLLS Customer service HI Hostels
My first ever big trip was to the Dominican Republic. It was my first trip to the Caribbean and the longest flight I’d ever taken. I had an amazing time and have such fond memories from that holiday. My favourite place in the world is ... this is a really difficult one to answer! I’ve not been to half the places I would like to visit. I would say that I love cities, in particular London, Edinburgh, Dublin and Stockholm, but I can imagine my favourite place to be Thailand. The next trip on my travel wishlist is South Africa. Working for Hostelling International, I‘ve had the pleasure of seeing fantastic photos of our hostels there. It has really inspired me to want to travel to the country. My guilty travel pleasure is indulging in great food and wine, as well as shopping! Wherever I travel to, I always try to taste the local produce and visit the local markets. TNTMAGAZINE.COM
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[Caption] Retro: tour Paris by 2CV, the classic French economy car Krakowâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s vodka tram
Odd tours EUROPE
Amsterdam by beer bike 66
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SHORTBREAK
Quirky Europe Why walk around a city when you can take the beer bike or the vodka tram? Check out our favourite unusual tours of Europe WORDS GILLY PICKUP
Gone are the days when sightseeing tours meant traipsing behind a yawn-inducing, umbrella-toting tour guide. These days, there’s no end of quirky ways to see the best of Europe’s greatest cities. How about Amsterdam by beer bike? Venice by kayak? Krakow by vodka tram? Bring it on.
See Amsterdam by beer bike WHAT: Drinking and pedalling whilst taking in the Netherlands’ beautiful capital. You and your mates climb aboard an 18-seater bar on wheels manned by a (sober) driver and help yourselves to unlimited free beer while lending a foot with the pedalling. On this two-hour tour, you’ll enjoy famous sights such as the Canal Belt without worrying about being nicked for drunk driving or speeding – the bar’s top speed is just 6kmph. WHY: Can you think of a reason why not? Plus there’s a karaoke machine on board, and the best drinker wins a yellow jersey. COST: About £354 for up to eight people and £396 for a group of nine-18 people. SEE: damtours.nl; sightseeingbike.com
See Stockholm by hiking across the rooftops
musicians, all while necking the finest firewater that Poland has to offer. WHY: Krakow is one of the biggest party zones in Eastern Europe, and the Old Town has more than 400 clubs, bars and pubs. So the tram is the perfect way to get the party started. COST: One-and-a-half hours of exclusive tram hire with vodka tasting (four shots) and two local beers is around £33 per person, based on a group of 10. SEE: funincracow.com
See Venice by kayak WHAT: Forget gondolas – the only way to discover Venice and visit parts of the city that few tourists get to see is by kayak. Plus, sharing the waterways with local ‘road users’ provides an authentic slice of everyday life in La Serenissima. See St Mark’s Square, the Bridge of Sighs and the Rialto Bridge; paddle your way past the palaces and homes to the toffery; and bob along the Grand Canal. Then strike out to see the islands that are all but inaccessible to tourists, but simply visited by kayak. WHY: A unique experience for adventure seekers – and those looking to tone up their arms. And what better way to see the floating city than from the water? ››
WHAT: This is no run-of-the-mill walking tour. You’ll be a dizzying 140ft above the city, but not to worry – you’re secured with safety equipment. And how else could you get a bird’s eye view of the islands on which Stockholm is based? The vista is particularly extraordinary from the rooftop of the Old Parliament building. If you go after dark, your guide will treat you to bloodcurdling stories of murder and mysterious things that go bump in the night. WHY: If you laugh in the face of normal sightseeing tours and fancy yourself a bit of a daredevil, this is the way to go. COST: £30 for 45 minutes. SEE: upplevmer.se
See Krakow by vodka tram WHAT: See Krakow’s sights by tram. No ordinary tram, however, as along with the video screens, pumping sound system and plush sofas, it comes with a vodka expert to guide you through the world of Polish vodka, its heritage and how to drink it. See Grand Square with its plethora of imposing landmarks, flower sellers, mime artists and street
See Stockholm from the city’s rooftops TNTMAGAZINE.COM
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MORE QUIRKY TOURS WEIRD WAYS TO SEE THE SIGHTS
GLADIATOR SCHOOL, ROME If you’ve seen all the Roman sites but have a hankering to indulge in more Roman life, the Gladiator’s School is for you. You’ll get dressed up in tunic, sandals and protective gear and are taught basic fighting techniques. Whether they then release the lions is unclear. SEE gsr-roma.com
Take to Venice’s canals in a kayak COST: An all-day trip with guide costs about £100pp for two-to-five people. SEE: venicekayak.com
See Barcelona by trixi tricycle WHAT: On these state-of-the-art tricycles – imagine a futuristic-rickshaw-ride and you’re pretty much there – you choose the route and your guide does the pedalling. As an optional extra, you can pay for someone to fan you as you’re whisked along. The decadence! If you choose the Gothic Quarter city tour, you’ll ride past visual delights including the majestic square Plaça del Rei, littered with medieval buildings and the remains of the ancient Roman city. You can work plenty of lively bars and tapas restaurants into your route, too. WHY: A two-person bike taxi offers a relaxed way to see along the roads other taxis can’t reach. And, by virtue of being pedal-powered, they’re eco-friendly to boot. COST: Prices vary according to tour; see the Gothic Quarter from £12.50 for 30 minutes. SEE: trixi.com
SPECIAL INTEREST WALKS, PRAGUE Choose a saunter suited to your liking with tour company Prague Walks. There are fashion tours, pub tours (more of a Prague stagger?) and ghost walks, on which tourists are told: “You can still smell blood and tears from murders, suicides and executions.” Maybe chug some Staropramen first to steel your nerves for that one. SEE praguewalks.com
TAPAS TOUR, MADRID Munch your way around Madrid with Walks of Spain. Visit the old town’s very best tapas bars where you’ll sample both the food and the wine. The tour promises at least six different dishes and five selections of wines, so have a light breakfast if you want value for money. Available every day except Monday. SEE walksofspain.com
WHAT: Razz around Paris in a Citroen 2CV, the much-loved French economy car that sadly went out of production in 1990. There are a few 2CV tours around town, but we like 4 roues sous 1 parapluie (or ‘four wheels under one umbrella’). The company’s cars come in a variety of colours, and you’ll be driven around by smart chauffeurs who, the operator tells us, “are polite, cultivated, elegant (dressed by Saint-James) and pleasant”. Good to know. The convertible cars take in a whistlestop tour of the city of love’s main sights. WHY: The 2CV is to Paris what the gondola is to Venice and the yellow cab is to New York. Throw in a stripy shirt, an onion necklace and a baguette and you couldn’t get any more French. COST: £15pp for three, or £24pp for two. Tours last 30 mins. SEE: 4roues-sous-1parapluie.com ❚ 68
Let your chauffeur do the pedalling on a trixi tricycle
Photos: Getty; Thinkstock; PhotoProEvent; trixi.com; funincracow.com; Upplev Me
See Paris by 2CV
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BANGKOK IN 48 HOURS /70
River View Guest House See, Feel, REAL Bangkok Great Location Great Rooms Great Prices www.riverviewbkk.com
BANGKOK
mail@riverviewbangkok.com +00 66 2 234 5429
m
followmebiketour.co
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TRAVELWEEKENDER
Bangin’ BKK This is Bangkok in 48 hours WORDS LAURA CHUBB
DAY 1: 09:00 Drop your bags at Villa Guesthouse (230 Soi 1, Thanon Samsen, Banglamphu, tel. 02281 7009). Set a few streets back from Khao San Road, it’s cheaper than the grotty hostels around the famous backpacker haunt, and a lot nicer, too – the traditional teak house is basic, but comfy, and there’s also a sunny, plant-filled courtyard at your disposal. From £7pn, with shared bathrooms. 10:00 Bangkok may be a famous party city, but it boasts more than its fair share of culture. Start the day by checking out Bangkok’s wats, or Buddhist temples. Probably the most visited is Wat Phra Kaew (Na Phralan, Phra Nakorn Old City, admission £7). This compound boasts intricately decorated temples, giant gold stupas, and the Emerald Buddha – Thailand’s most holy image. You can also see the former royal residence, the Grand Palace, which lives up to its name. 12:00 A short walk from here is Wat Pho (Th Sanam Chai, admission £1). Most impressive is the Reclining Buddha, a huge gold-leaf statue meant to represent Buddha passing into nirvana. Check out the soles of the statue’s feet, on which there are illustrations rendered in mother of pearl, then try fitting the 46m-long, 15m-high creation into one photograph. 14:00 Then head over the river to Wat Arun (Th Arun Amarin, admission £1), which cuts a majestic figure on the bank. A ferry from Tha Tien to the temple costs about 7p. Most impressive is the wat’s 82m-high tower. 16:00 If you’ve got any more sightseeing left in you, we can highly recommend a trip to Jim Thompson’s House 70
(6 Soi Kasem San 2, Th Phra Ram I, admission £2). The US entrepreneur – founder of the renowned Jim Thompson Thai Silk Company – fused a number of Thai teak houses together to create an impressive complex, and it makes for a fascinating, quirky tour. 18:00 For Bangkok’s most entertaining evening meal, head to The Flying Chicken (99/1 Bangna Trad, Bangna – opposite Royal Dragon and BITEC – tel. 02399 5252). Order the eponymous signature dish, and it will – we shit you not – be catapulted into the air, then caught on a spike attached to a helmet worn by a waiter riding a unicycle. You’ll even get chance to try to catch the chicken yourself. The unexpected bonus is that the food is actually good. 20:00 Continue the evening’s excitement at the Lumphini Stadium (Th Phra Ram IV Lumphini, tel. 02251 4303), where you can see some seriously brutal Muay Thai bouts. Arrive a few rounds in and you’ll probably snag a ringside seat at a cut price (about £30) – doubly awesome as you get a great view and beers brought to your seat. 22:00 It wouldn’t be a night out in Bangkok without a pingpong show. Taxi over to the Patpong area and, wherever you end up, make sure there’s a cover charge – anywhere that doesn’t ask for one is scamming you, and will bring over an astronomical bill at the end of the night. Also, don’t listen to the tuk-tuk drivers who offer to take you to a cheaper show outside of Patpong – you can expect to end up somewhere particularly unsavoury. 00:00 The night needn’t end here. Finish up on Khao San Road, where the rowdy strip of backpacker bars parties
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Photos: Thinkstock, Getty
And relax: the giant Reclining Buddha statue at Wat Pho
on until dawn. Then it’s just a short walk home to Villa Guesthouse. DAY 2: 13:00 Take your hangover to sparkling shopping mall Siam Paragon (siamparagon.co.th), where the food court offers up an overwhelming array of treats – try the Chiang Mai sausage for the strange sensation of a banger that tastes like Thailand. The air conditioning should help the alcohol sweats. 15:00 Feeling refreshed? Then dive into Chatuchak Weekend Market (Th Kamphaeng Phet 3), where more than 5000 stalls will be vying for your attention. Everything and anything is for sale, from clothes and trinkets, to live snakes. 18:00 The best food you’ll eat in Thailand will be bought from street stalls, where curries, pad thais and everything in between are best enjoyed with an ice-cold Thai coffee. But if you fancy splashing out on your last night, the most spectacular place to KO the wallet is Sirocco. The world’s highest al-fresco restaurant gives a breathtaking vista of the city, set on the 63rd floor of the Dome at Lebua (lebua.com). Expect a five-star price tag. 21:00 End your weekend at Coyote (coyotebangkok. com), where there are more than 75 types of margarita to choose from. Also serves some of the most mouth-blistering hot sauces on the planet. Can you think of a better way to end a weekend of debauchery in Bangkok? Flights from London Heathrow to Bangkok, via Muscat, start from £480 return with Oman Air omanair.com
Tuk-tuk: avoid drivers who promise a cheap ping-pong show
Brutal: catch the Muay Thai bouts at Lumphini Stadium TNTMAGAZINE.COM
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Anzac Day Istanbul
TURKEY
[Caption] 72
Gallipoli
GETTING THERE Flights from London Gatwick to Istanbul start from ÂŁ149 return with Turkish Airlines. (turkishairlines.com/en-uk)
TURKEY
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Rite of passage An Anzac Day tour can give you a glimpse into Gallipoli’s haunting past, but also helps you to discover Turkey’s present EDITED BY LAURA CHUBB
Seeing in Anzac Day at Anzac Cove in Gallipoli is a rite of passage that brings thousands of Antipodeans to Turkey on April 25. And there’s a multitude of Anzac Day trips to choose from, with tour operators offering up itineraries that span anywhere between two days and two weeks. While it’s the big day that is most important, most excursions tack on other destinations in Turkey that are well worth your time. Here, we show you what you can expect from the main event, and provide a guide to some other parts of the country that you can explore while on an Anzac tour. Anzac Cove, by Jahn Vannisselroy As dawn breaks at North Beach on the Gallipoli Peninsula, it’s not the wind whistling across the water that’s the most chilling sensation around. Nor is it the damp grass where we’ve lain all night. It’s the refrain of The Last Post that sends tingles up the spines of the 10,000 sombre Antipodeans huddled at the foot of the hill known as the Sphinx. The sound of the lone bugle highlights the eerie silence as the sun peeks over the horizon, promising, but not yet delivering, warmth. We stand for our fallen brothers, who checked out of this world on the beaches of Gallipoli, guns in sweaty hands, fear thumping in tight chests. The day before the Dawn Service, Gallipoli is a lively place. The inlet glows golden, heated by our brightest star’s afternoon caress. At first glance, Gallipoli shows no trace of its brutal past. But a walk to the beach soon reveals rows of young men’s graves. The night before the Dawn Service, at Anzac Cove where thousands camp out, the hordes drape their flags on every available space. There’s none of the usual raucous banter that accompanies a band of travelling folk from Down Under. Even the most energetic party animals recognise contemplation and respect are the order of the day – though the complete ban on alcohol probably helps. As night unfurls its dark blanket across the bay, temperatures plummet. But few complain. “Harden up” is the sharp response delivered to those who do. We’re here for the thousands of young men, tempted into the armed forces with promises of ‘seeing the world’, who sacrificed
their lives in a battle they could not win. We’re here – fully equipped with sleeping bags, thermals, and enough hot food to feed an army – for one night only. We will leave Anzac Cove. Some were not so fortunate. Tonight we remember them all. As darkness chokes the last of the daylight, the big screen flickers and glows with tributes to our fallen compatriots. The fresh faces of young men slaughtered where we sit draw gasps from the assembled crowd. It’s the face of James Martin, the youngest soldier to have his journey extinguished, that causes the biggest jolt. The Australian was 14 when he contracted typhoid in the trenches and died soon afterwards. Martin had lied to a recruitment officer,
“
We stand for our fallen brothers
”
saying he was 18. “I can’t even imagine going to war now, and I’m 32, let alone 14,” an Aussie voice says. Murmurs of agreement echo from the freezing hillside. A band play into the night – their renditions of First World War songs breathe life into the images we watch on screen. Documentaries softly relate the stories of those who survived and their offspring; we’re reminded war affects generations, robbing families of their leaders, their mates, their lovers. As the sun rises, the last notes of Reveille evaporate and the final prayer is delivered before we sing all three – Turkish, New Zealand and Australian – national anthems. Soon after, the migration to either Lone Pine (for Australians) and Chunuk Bair (for New Zealanders) begins. Thanks to the rising heat, it’s an uphill struggle to get to the New Zealand ceremony, but a glance at the old trenches at the side of the road makes sure complaints are never given voice. What we do hear at Chunuk Bair, however, is Lieutenant Colonel William Malone’s last letter to his wife, written August 5, 1915. ›› “My desire for life so that I may see and be with you TNTMAGAZINE.COM
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Majestic: an elegant mosque in Istanbul again could not be greater, but I have only done what every man was bound to do in our country’s need.” The words from the grave soar over the crowd, each an unavoidable spark of pride, honour and love lost. “I am prepared for death and hope that God will have forgiven me all my sins.” He was killed three days later and remains one of the many New Zealanders with no known grave at Gallipoli. As the dignitaries tenderly lay wreaths at the foot of the towering memorial, the night’s chill has completely given way to the sun’s relentless scorch. It’s yet another feat of endurance but, as we are all now fully aware, nothing compared to the suffering, the fear, and the bravery of our predecessors.
Fairytale: Cappadocia’s storybook scenery gay/ lesbian bars. Still, don’t feel like it’s too touristy and not trendy enough to enjoy a cruise on the Bosphorus and toke on a shisha (or nargileh as they call it in these parts) while watching a whirling dervish. It’s all part of the fun. Cappadocia There’s nothing on this Earth quite like Cappadocia. Its landscape of dwellings, temples and churches carved from the countryside’s stone cliffs creates a scene stolen straight from a storybook, and never fails to astound.
Istanbul Where to start in Istanbul? Turkey’s biggest city is an intoxicating blend of east and west. Majestic mosques stand elegantly against the skyline, while heaving bazaars do serious business below. (Don’t miss the Blue Mosque and the Grand Bazaar, the finest examples of both.) Topkapi Palace is another must-see, a grand setting for the sultans of the Ottoman Empire, while the Hagia Sophia is yet another picture-perfect sight – once a cathedral, then a mosque, and now a museum. For the ultimate taste of the exotic east, you have to try a Turkish bath. They won’t be gentle with you – expect to have buckets of water unceremoniously dumped over your head and to be slapped into a furious lather – but it sure feels refreshing. And you’ll get a soothing apple tea to help you relax afterwards. Then there’s hip Istanbul – the flashy clubs, modern galleries, Oxford Street-esque shopping districts and overtly 74
Pamukkale’s calcium terraces
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Set in the historical region of Central Anatolia, it has hosted civilisations from the Persian Empire, the Romans and Byzantines, and eventually Turkish clans in the 11th century. Chances are that on a tour, you’ll also pay a visit to the Ihlara Valley, near the Mount Hasan and Mount Melendiz volcanoes of Cappadocia. Here, a 100m-deep canyon houses more than 4000 rock-cut cave homes and churches. You should also get chance to check out some of the area’s underground cities, which were home to thousands of people. Some of these cities have as many as four floors, stretching 20m below ground. Many were connected to each other via a network of underground tunnels. These mindblowing warrens of weirdness are thought to have been in use since the Bronze Age. Delving into them is an experience you’ll never forget.
TALKING TURKEY
Pamukkale This place has to be seen to be believed. Pamukkale’s calcium terraces look like something from another planet; a series of shelves formed from calcium carbonate in which calciumrich waters have pooled. (Think of Asia’s rice terraces, only rendered in a sparkling white.) Thanks to its otherworldly appearance, and the wonders that the waters are believed to work on muscles and bones, Pamukkale nowadays is a tourist-packed spa town. Indeed, over-exposure to tour groups has had an adverse effect on the site and you can no longer bathe in the pools on the terraces. But that shouldn’t take away from Pamukkale’s visual impact, which will still steal the breath. Ephesus One of the world’s best-preserved classical cities, Ephesus (or Efes, like the beer) started out as an ancient Greek city before it became a major Roman stronghold. It’s probably best known for the Library of Celsus, of which the impressive façade – built in 125AD – has been reconstructed from the original pieces, though it looks like it could crumble into a heap any minute. Really, you’re spoilt for choice when it comes to picking a favourite mind-boggling ruin – the theatre at the end of a colonnaded street, for example, is ruddy massive, and the ›› Temple of Hadrian dates from the 2nd century.
MUSTAFA KEMAL ATATURK (1881-1938) is Turkey’s most revered figure. You will see his face on flags and murals no matter where you travel in the country. He was a soldier and a general in Turkey’s army before becoming president in 1923 and modernising the country. Ataturk was at Gallipoli in 1915 as commander of the 19th Division and was on hand to oppose the Anzac landing in April. His excellent grasp of strategy and ability to inspire his troops with his reckless bravery in action proved crucial in thwarting the Allies. He later won the respect of New Zealanders and Australians with his 1934 tribute to the Anzacs: “Those heroes that shed their blood and lost their lives ... You are now lying in the soil of a friendly country. Therefore rest in peace. There is no difference between the Johnnies and the Mehmets to us where they lie side by side now here in this country of ours ... you, the mothers, who sent their sons from faraway countries wipe away your tears; your sons are now lying in our bosom and are in peace. After having lost their lives on this land, they have become our sons as well.”
The Library of Celsus, Ephesus
Between 1924-1938 Ataturk introduced a series of reforms he considered vital to his people’s salvation. Among these was the abolishment of Islamic Law and the introduction of a secular legal code. He also discouraged the veiling of women and encouraged western clothing. In 1934 he gave Turkish women the vote and the right to hold office. If you’re in Istanbul visit the Ataturk Museum to find out more about his life. JV
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Kusadasi This is the place to get your party on. Think pubs, karaoke and endless lines of hawkers trying to sell you a carpet. There are some great Aegean coast beaches nearby and a few classier bars in the old quarter, but if you’re ready to let loose after an emotional Anzac Day, Kusadasi’s firmly-onthe-tourist-trail nightlife is precisely what you’re looking for. And there are worse ways to cure a hangover than snoozing on the sand to the sound of a lapping sea. Troy You might not get Brad Pitt in a skirt, but an excursion to Troy still makes for a fascinating diversion. The setting for the Trojan War and that horse boasts a smattering of old structures – including an amphitheatre and portions of the legendary walls – and excavations that can give you a decent sense of how the ancient town must have looked. ❚ Various tour operators run Anzac Day trips. For the latest last-minute offers, keep your beady eyes on our Late Deals page online at tntmagazine.com/travel/late-deals
Party on: Kusadasi is the place to let loose
Troy: probably not the actual Trojan horse
BROTHERS IN ARMS TURKEY AND THE ANTIPODEANS THE HISTORY OF GALLIPOLI is littered with stories about the camaraderie between the opposing sides. As boredom set in there was a “constant traffic” of gifts being thrown across no man’s land: sweets and fruit from the Turkish soldiers, and cans of beef and smokes from the Allies. There are tales of one old Ottoman batman being allowed to hang his platoon’s washing on the barbed wire without attracting fire.
Photos: Thinkstock; Getty
Contemplation: Anzac Day is emotional
NEXT WEEK At one stage, a ceasefire was declared and the two sides moved their dead and wounded. The tradition of friendship is continued today in Turkey where New Zealanders and Australians are greeted warmly and treated with respect throughout the country. JV 78
Varanasi: Burning bodies and intense spirituality in India
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Anzac Day BBQ Commemorate with In association with
Elk Bar, Fulham Wednesday 25th April 12noon till Late EVENT DEATILS Two Up Tournament AFL Screening Live music & DJ Anzac biscuits and BBQ food Drink specials
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INDEPENDENT TRAVELLERS SO YOU TRAVEL WITH LIKEMINDED PEOPLE
*
‘EVERY OTHER DAY’ * SERVICE TO AND FROM EVERY DESTINATION ON OUR NETWORK
£335
*
IDEAL FOR THE BUDGET TRAVELLER YOU DECIDE HOW TO SPEND YOUR CASH PLANNING YOUR TRIP IS EASY WITH OUR ONLINE TOOLS
Issued to all Busabout Hop-on Hop-off passengers plus Italy, Spain and all Eastern Europe Treks FIND OUT MORE NEWS & VIEWS
/BUSABOUTeurope WATCH OUR VLOGGERS
FOLLOW US
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10% OFF *
SAVE £30
4 DAYS 6 APRIL WAS £299 NOW £269 Easter is a time of feasts, fun and plenty of partying so make the most of your long weekend and head over to Paris. A rocking Easter party awaits you in arguably one of the world’s most beautiful cities and there’s no better time to be there than spring
RUNNING OF THE BULLS, PAMPLONA SPAIN
5 DAY FROM £219 CAMPING ONLY
5 & 4 DAY FROM £269 HOSTEL
6 DAY FROM £299
INCLUSIONS: Your fantastic Busabout Guide / Return
DEPARTING LONDON CAMPING
Coach and ferry from London / 3 nights accommodation and breakfasts, 2 dinners. Plus over £40 worth of excursions INCLUDING Bike tour and river cruise / trip to Palace of Versailles with picnic lunch / climb up to the top of the Eiffel Tower / Paris night tour by coach
ALL TRIPS INCLUDE: All accommodation / breakfasts / Pamps t-shirt / panuelo / coach shuttles to and from all the bull runs and the services of the Busabout Festival Team
* Enter promocode ‘easter’. Limited spaces. GROUPS OF 4 - SAVE 5% GROUPS OF 10 - SAVE 10%
08450 267 514 TNT_1491_travel.indd 94
www.busabout.com
SAVE 10% WHEN YOU BUY TWO OR MORE QUALIFYING TRIPS
info@busabout.com 23/3/12 11:06:22
RS
2011 TRIPLE AWARD WINNERS
OU
UK BEST EUROPEAN TOUR OPERATOR AS VOTED BY YOU
TRAVEL
ks re T e p o r u E n er st a E & s re tu Adven ANZAC DAY E DEPARTUR
Ottoman Trek
Ibiza Island Hopper
ANZAC DEPARTURE 17 APRIL
7 DAYS (Apr-Sep)
FROM £479 STUDENTS FROM £459
Croatia, Bosnia, Serbia, Bulgaria & Turkey INCLUSIONS: 6 nights accommodation and breakfast, Belgrade walking tour, Mostar local guide, Sarajevo walking tour with tunnel entrance, Istanbul orientation walk
There are two ways to go: 1.Retox then Detox (Ibiza - Mallorca - Menorca) 2.Detox then Retox (Menorca - Mallorca - Ibiza) 8 DAYS (Jun-Sep)
FROM £539 STUDENTS FROM £519
7 nights accommodation and breakfasts, All ferry tickets and transfers, guided orientations of local attractions on each island, organised nights out in every island, discount Ibiza club tickets
INCLUSIONS:
Italian Adventure 3 DAYS (May-Sep)
FROM £189 STUDENTS FROM £179
Pompeii, Sorrento, Capri & Amalfi INCLUSIONS: 2 nights accommodation, entry to Pompeii and tour with local guide, orientation tour of Sorrento, boat trip to and around Capri, Limoncello and chocolate tasting
ANZAC DAY E DEPARTUR
Scandi-Baltic Adventure
Classic Balkan Iberian Adventure 7 DAYS (Jun-Sep)
There are two ways to go: 1.Vilnius to Tallin 2.Tallin to Vilnius
FROM £469 STUDENTS FROM £449
8 DAYS (Jun-Aug)
Cordoba, Seville, Lagos, Tarifa, Ronda, Granada, Consuegra & Toledo INCLUSIONS: 6 nights accommodation, orientation walks in each town, guided tour with a local through the remarkable city of Seville
FROM £499 STUDENTS FROM £479
ANZAC DEPARTURE 24 APRIL
9 DAYS (Apr-Oct)
FROM £539 STUDENTS FROM £519
Turkey, Greece, Albania, Montenegro & Croatia INCLUSIONS: 8 nights accommodation and breakfasts, 2 dinners, Gallipoli tour, orientation walks of Thessaloniki, Tirana and Budva
Lithuania, Latvia, Estonia, Sweden & Finland INCLUSIONS: 7 nights accommodation and breakfasts, 2 Baltic Sea cruise nights, all orientation walks, Riga club entrance
POST
ANZAC DAY
SEE MORE AY WITH A 2 D
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Greek Odyssey details below
Sail Turkey POST ANZAC DEPARTURE 28 APRIL
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FROM £295
Fethiye, Kekova’s Sunken City, Oulodeniz, Blue Lagoon, Kas & Kalkan INCLUSIONS: 7 nights accommodation, breakfasts, lunches and dinners, afternoon tea and coffee, snorkels/ masks/flippers and fishing lines, board games, on board sound system
New for 2012 Greek
Greek Island Hopper 9 WEEKS - 5 MONTHS (May-Sep) 4 ISLAND FLEXI-HOPPER
FROM £255 STUDENTS FROM £245
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Odyssey
METEORA & DELPHI
2 DAYS £139 INCLUDES: 1 night accommodation (triple share) & breakfast/ local guide in Delphi, plus site & museum entrance fees / local guide in Kalambaka, plus entrance fees for two monasteries GROUPS OF 4 - SAVE 5% GROUPS OF 10 - SAVE 10%
08450 267 514 TNT_1491_travel.indd 95
www.busabout.com
Classic Rhapsody 9 DAYS (May-Sep)
FROM £565 STUDENTS FROM £545
Czech Republic, Poland, Slovakia, Hungary & Croatia INCLUSIONS: 8 nights accommodation and breakfasts, walking tour of Olomouc, Auschwitz and Birkenau guided tours, bike tour of Krakow, orientation walks of Zakopane and Split, entrance to the Plitvice National Park
More Adventures Available Online 7 & 10 DAY EGYPT FROM £379 8 & 15 DAY MOROCCO FROM £574 SAVE 10% WHEN YOU BUY TWO OR MORE QUALIFYING TRIPS TNTMAGAZINE.COM info@busabout.com
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TRAVEL TNTMAGAZINE.COM
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HIGHLAND FLING 5 DAYS Normally £189 - Now £159 9
SKYE HIGH 3 DAYS Normally £115 - Now £99
Loch Ness, Isle of Skye & North West Highlands
Isle of Skye, Loch Ness & Glencoe
(Students Normally £179 - Now £149)
EASTER DEPARTURE APRIL
(Students Normally £109 - Now £93)
EASTER DEPARTURE
TRAVEL
£30* SAVE UP TO www.HAGGiSadventures.com/spring 6,7 & 9 APRIL
* March, April & May departures. Book by 1 April. Enter promocode ‘spring’
ALSO AVAILABLE: 10, 7 & 5 day trips of Scotland, Wales & Cornwall (Mar - Oct) plu ENG s L & WA AND LES
HIGHLAND EASTER 3 DAYS £115 NOW £99 V
DEPARTS EDINBURGH 6 & 7 APRIL LOCH NESS, ISLE OF SKYE & GLENCOE V
SAVE
£16
Enter promocode ‘spring’. Limited spaces
DEPARTS LONDON 5 APRIL EDINBURGH, LOCH NESS & ISLE OF SKYE INCLUDES: Return coach from London, 2 nights
SAVE
£28
hostel accommodation in Edinburgh, orientation walk of Edinburgh & 2 nights hostel accommodation in the Highlands 3 DAYS £179 NOW £251 X DEPARTS LONDON 7 APRIL CARDIFF & BRECON BEACONS
DO IT RIGHT PASSIONATE LOCAL SCOTTISH GUIDES
5 DAYS £279 NOW £251 X
EASTER WALES
DOING IT ONCE? “THE BEST TIME OF MY LIFE” @adventurouskate &HUWL¿FDWH RI ([FHOOHQFH
SAVE
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STUDENT DISCOUNTS PREFERRED BY STA TRAVEL & FLIGHT CENTRE GLOBALLY
Two nights twin share hostel accommodation, full cooked Welsh breakfast & FREE entry to the Big Pit coal mine
INCLUDES:
ALL IRELAND ROCKER 7 DAYS(Apr-Oct) £315 (Students £299)
LONELY PLANET GUIDEBOOK
2011
£18
X Enter promocode ‘easter’. Limited spaces
FREE
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SAVE UP TO £30
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CELTIC ROCKER 5 DAYS
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BLARNEY CASTLE, CLIFFS OF MOHER, GALWAY, INIS MOR, GIANT’S CAUSEWAY & BELFAST
Normally £215 - Now £185 (Students Normally £205 - Now £175)
Normally £125 - Now £109 (Students Normally £119 - Now £103)
Includes FREE entry to: Blarney Castle, Cliffs of Moher, Giant’s Causeway & Carrick-a-Rede Rope Bridge
BLARNEY CASTLE, CLIFFS OF MOHER, KILLARNEY, INIS MOR/CONNEMARA
BLARNEY CASTLE, CLIFFS OF MOHER, GALWAY & DINGLE
Includes FREE entry to: Blarney Castle & Cliffs of Moher
Includes FREE entry to: Blarney Castle & Cliffs of Moher
WESTERN ROCKER 3 DAYS (May-Sep) £125 (Students £119) INIS MOR, CLIFFS OF MOHER & GALWAY Includes FREE entry to: Cliffs of Moher
GIANT’S ROCKER 5 DAYS (May-Sep) £215 (Students £205) GALWAY, INIS MOR, GIANT’S CAUSEWAY, DERRY & BELFAST Includes FREE entry to: Cliffs of Moher, Giant’s Causeway & Carrick-a-Rede Rope Bridge
EASTER DEPARTURE 6 APRIL
* March, April & May departures. Book by 1 April. Enter promocode ‘spring’
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*
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TRAVEL
Travelling to Europe on a Walkabout? Cover valid throughout EU and other countries* Cover available for Campers including Vans Cover for periods ranging from 15 days to 1 year No permanent address needed, documents can be emailed Overseas driving licence acceptable *for more detailed information visit
hertsinsurance.com/walkabout 2U FDOO +,& WR GLVFXVV ﾃ？[LEOH FDU LQVXUDQFH for up to 12 months
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Herts Insurance Consultants Ltd is authorised and regulated by the Financial Services Authority No 309073
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TRAVEL
ANZAC DAY GALLIPOLI TOURS ■ 3 Day Tour 24-26 APR £199 ■ 4 Day Tour 23-26 APR £249 ■ 5 Day Tour 22-26 APR £289 ■ 8/9 Day Tours 18-26 APR or ■ 15/16 Day Tours 11-26 APR or
22-29 APR £399 22 APR-6 MAY fr£589
WESTERN FRONT TOUR ■ Eurostar Tour
WE SAIL CROATIA’S BEST ISLANDS & ROUTE! ✔ Split ✔ Markaska ✔ Mljet ✔ Dubrovnik ✔ Korcula ✔ Vela Luca ✔ Hvar ✔ Bol ✔ Brac ■ CAT A: JUN £469 JUL fr£449 AUG fr£449 ■ CAT A+: JUN £399 JUL fr£469 AUG fr£469 SEP £429
23-25 APR £299
FOOTBALL SOCCEROOS & ENGLISH PREMIER LEAGUE ■ Fulham FC v Norwich City SAT 31 MAR ■ Fulham FC v Wigan Athletic SAT 21 APR ■ Fulham FC v Sunderland SUN 6 MAY ■ Socceroos v Denmark: Copenhagen SAT 2 JUN
CATEGORY A & A+ BOATS AT UNBEATABLE PRICES! ■ 7 NIGHTS JUN-SEP fr£399
£38 £33 £38 £35
ROYAL ASCOT DON’T MISS BLACK CAVIAR’S EUROPEAN DEBUT! ■ Golden Jubilee Day SAT 23 JUN £59 ✔ Coach Day Trip ✔ Silver Ring Ticket
ITALY TOURS CHECK OUT THE BEST ITALY HAS TO OFFER! ■ 7 Days JUN-AUG £299 ✔ Rome ✔ Florence ✔ Cinque Terre ✔ Pisa ✔ Venice ✔ Milan
PALIO SIENA ITALY’S CRAZY 350 YEAR OLD FESTIVAL ■ Hostel Package 14-17 AUG £149 ■ Extended packages also available fr£529
LA TOMATINA THE WORLD’S BIGGEST FOOD FIGHT! 27-30 AUG £149 ■ 4 Days Beach Camping ■ 4 Days Hostel/3 Days Hotel 27/28-30 AUG £189/£169 ■ Ibiza, Barcelona & Italy Combo tours also available!
✔ CROATIA + PAMPLONA TOUR
23 JUN-8 JUL £848
PAMPLONA THE INCREDIBLE RUNNING OF THE BULLS! ■ 4 Days Pamps/San Seb Camping 4-15 JUL ■ Italy-Barcelona-Pamps 26 JUN-8 JUL ■ Barcelona + Pamplona Fiesta 2-8 JUL ■ Pamplona + Ibiza Combo 5-11 JUL ■ San Sebastian + Pamps 3-8 or 5-10 JUL ■ Coach Tours Depart 3 or 4 JUL fr£279 ■ 4 Days San Sebastian Hostel 5-8 JUL £269 ■ 4 Days Pamplona Hotel 5-8 JUL £329
GREEK
ISLANDS
£159 £749 £349 £399 £239
GREEK ISLANDS
GREEK ISLAND PARTY HOPPER ■ 9 Days £399 ■ 11 Days £489 Tours start in Athens every Sat JUL-AUG ✔ Mykonos ✔ Ios ✔ Santorini ✔ Paros ✔ Athens ✔ High speed ferries ✔ Breakfasts ✔ Fanatics Tour Rep ✔ Parties
OKTOBERFEST BEERFEST IN MUNICH! ■ Prague + Buda Fest ■ 6 Days Coach Tours ■ 4 Days Camping ■ 4 Days Hostel ■ 6 Days Hotel
21 SEP-8 OCT
8 Days Thu-Tue Fri-Mon Fri-Mon Fri-Mon
fr£329 fr£219 fr£129 fr£189 £349
BOOK ONLINE NOW! www.thefanatics.com or call 0207 240 3223 COVENT GARDEN OFFICE 1st
Floor, 15 New Row, Covent Garden, WC2N 4LD Mon - Fri 9am - 6pm TNTMAGAZINE.COM 101
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TRAVEL
WEEKEND BREAKS AND DAY TOURS THJIHJRWHJRLYZ JVT
Tours
Hostels Adventures
EASTER BREAKS (FRI 6 - MON 9 APRIL) ISLE OF WIGHT from £229 Return travel by coach/ferry, 3 nights B&B accom, sightseeing tour and tour manager.
HOLLAND & BELGIUM
from
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PARIS BY EUROSTAR
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Return travel by Eurostar, 3 nights B&B accom, sightseeing tour and tour manager.
THE genuine 3 day tour of Skye!*
NETHERLANDS, GERMANY & BELGIUM from £249
Departs Edinburgh Mondays and Fridays
Return coach and ferry travel, 3 nights B&B, tour manager, visits to Amsterdam, Cologne and Brugge!
STONEHENGE PRIVATE ACCESS ;OL Z[\Ɉ [OH[ SLNLUKZ HYL THKL VM
STAND INSIDE THE INNER CIRCLE!
Departs Edinburgh Mondays
INCL. GUIDE AND SALISBURY from £71pp Morning tour departs 6 Apr, 20 Apr, 4 May, 18 May Evening tour departs 9 Apr, 23 Apr, 7 May, 21 May
DAY TRIPS The REAL monster weekend away
£48 £32
Departs Edinburgh Saturdays
in the Scottish Highlands!
3 DAYS JUST £99
2 DAYS £59
Spend a memorable Easter on the Isle of Skye!
Get in all the sights and a spot of monster hunting on Loch Ness!
Departs Edinburgh Friday 6th April Monday 9th April
Departs Edinburgh Saturday 7th April
¸ Sat 7 Apr. A day in Wales from ¸ Sun 8 Apr Warwick Castle from ¸ Mon 9 Apr. Windsor & Hampton Court from ¸ Sat 14 Apr Cambridge from ¸ Sun 15 Apr Brighton from
£32 £32
£40
PLUS Stonehenge & Bath EVERYDAY. From £50 with entrances to Stonehenge & the Roman Baths included! Oxford and Stratford TUES, THURS, SAT & SUN From £45
LUXURY MINI COACH TOURS No more than 15 people with customer specified pick ups in zone 1 From
£58
¸ EVERYDAY - Oxford, Stratford & Cotswolds ¸ EVERYDAY - Stonehenge, Glastonbury & Avebury ¸ EVERY SAT & SUN - Leeds Castle, Canterbury & White Cliffs of Dover
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Voted HostelWorld's Number 1 Hostel in Scotland 2008, 2009 and 2010! We were also named in the Top 10 Best Hostels in the World for 2010!
www.andersontours.co.uk or call 0207 436 9304 Follow us @andersontours
Anderson Tours is fully bonded by Client Trust Account
Anderson Tours Travel Shop, 81 Charlotte Street, London W1T 4PP
for details of our great hostels visit scotlandstophostels.com Visit the world-famous Loch Ness and get a taste of the Scottish Highlands Departs Edinburgh 5 days a week
macbackpackers.com 0131 558 9900 /MacBackpackersTours
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at Knebworth 23rd June 2012! CONCERT TICKET AND RETURN COACH TRAVEL LONDON KNEBWORTH ONLY £92
Think Scotland. Think MacBackpackers. * MacBackpackers runs the only genuine 3 day tour of the Isle of Skye for backpackers. Unlike other backpacker companies we actually stay overnight on the island - spending up to 36 hours there, compared to as little as 6 hours with other operators.
BOOK ON ANDERSONTOURS.CO.UK OR CALL 0207 436 9304
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TRAVEL
Amazing savings on Europe
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Greek Islands Greek Island Hopping
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contiki.com/deals | 0845 026 8900 TNTMAGAZINE.COM 103
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Africa With Grace Create your own Adventure Safari OR
nd ya a Ken ame ia G n a z Tan ris Safa 0US $290
Kenya Game Safaris $2100US
Zim bab Rhi we no Saf a $14 60U ris S
Get amongst it! With the African specialists Absolute Africa 30 years overlanding in Africa
A whole range of trips incl. game drives in the Masai Mara and the Serengeti, gorilla trekking, guided game walks, rhino trekking, evening game drives and so much more.
africawithgrace@live.com or +61 404 238 209
www.absoluteafrica.com Phone: 0208 742 0226 Email: absaf@absoluteafrica.com
ay On e-Wers! Pio n e
Take a traditional Croatian cruiser with its local crew, the warm, crystal clear waters of the Adriatic, a bunch of travellers seeking fun and adventure and add a Busabout Guide. The result? Only one of the best weeks of your life... GET TO CROATIA FROM AS LITTLE AS £55 ONE WAY. VISIT WWW.BUSABOUT.COM/CROATIA-SAILING FOR MORE INFORMATION.
Croatia Island Hopper 8 DAYS FROM £384 Departs Split (May – September)
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orientations of Split and Dubrovnik, English speaking Busabout Guide and expert local crew. GROUPS OF 4 - SAVE 5% GROUPS OF 10 - SAVE 10%
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FREIGHT
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CLASSIFIEDS
CARE WORK
PART-TIME CARE ASSISTANT a3 hours per day, starting at 9am
a Basic Housekeeping + cooking
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Post your message at tntmagazine.com/seeking or email seeking@tntmagazine.com. Text TNT and your message to 81707* full of good times, good people and good travel for for you. There certainly aren’t any bulls to run with while tanked on Sangria in Aus land! So long, Farewell. Bex. Crazy dancing guy at the TNT St Patrick’s Day party: What a crazy fun night of Irish craic: you, me, an encounter at the bar, snakebite upon snakebite, sliding on the floor, stealing glances at each other from behind the gravity-defying masses of hair
credit where credit’s due. Going back to university after all these years can’t have been an easy decision.Go put the ‘stud’ back into study, boy. Booyeah. Aimz. Such love: They say you can pick your friends but you can’t choose your relatives. Well, somehow I struck gold with both – and they keep rolling in! I can’t wait for next week, curly Sue and Micky D. From your mate, Beats. T-Bone: I’m sorry you found
THINGS THE QUEEN SHOULD DO BEFORE SHE DIES
#472 Take up archery after seeing The Hunger Games twice at the cinema
worn by cheaply dressed girls, and being bundled out of the bar in a headlock by the bouncers. Hope it didn’t hurt too much. It may have been my fault. Let me kiss you better? Steph. Third degree: I might be university educated but you won’t learn a thing from me. See for yourself. Miss BaSc A gamble: Paul, you have stolen the plates in the kitchen for the last time. I’ve put laxative in some food of yours. The question is, which food? Jam & Ham. Back to school: Drew boy,
the people of London “crass”. I did enjoy your impression of a Londoner bobbing and weaving down the street, though. Hope the experience hasn’t sent you back to the Big Apple forever. Come back and teach me the art of the uncrass, at least! D-Dogx Lynnie Lynster: Holy fucking shit! I can’t believe you’re knocked up! We’ll skip that whole ‘was it planned?’ question and just say mahoosive congrats instead. Come stay with us in London town any time, avec sprog. Love, the Moorlands Massive.
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More sex please: I don’t know how we started talking outside the She Bu Walkie about a month back but you wheeled my bike over to Ginglik for me. We didn’t stay long and I can’t remember your name or anything else about you except you lived in ‘mansions’ in Barons Court and the sex was great. After yet another below-average romp on the weekend I’m wondering why I didn’t break my rule of keeping one-night stands to one night, and give you my number. Maybe bump into you again at the walkie-B? BB Jac: Although we may have forgotten your name when we first met a couple of years ago, it was only temporary, seeing as there are now loads of awesome adventures and stories that we all remember you by (some which we won’t let you forget in a hurry)! As you now depart on a new job and adventure, with an entirely new load of drunks and disorderlies to look after, don’t forget there’s a few here back in London that are going to miss you a lot! Until next time. Safe travels J! xox Goodbye ferals: Brit and Nate, life without you will never be the same at the Balham mansion again. Our livers will be stronger, our noses cleaner, our bank balances healthier, our house tidier, and we may actually achieve something on a Sunday other than ChatGirlLiveTV. We miss you already. Love your Brandreth family. Adios Jerermy: Sticking your tools in Guy Ritchie’s toilet isn’t a bad memory to leave London on, Jezz. I hope the capital’s been
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