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October 7-13 2013 Issue 1571 tntmagazine.com

!0 IN W 00 COOL £1

A BAR TAB AT GIGALUM

IN SEARCH OF A WEE DRAM On the whisky trail in the remote Islay

THE RIDE OF YOUR LIFE Navigating Bolivia’s salt flats by motorbike

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R E E B E Y B BYE

t martini c fe r e p e h t d how to mix n a – n w o d tail Week low k c o C n o d n o L ISSUE 1571 / £1.95

+ SECRET ITALY WORLD’S TOP 5 MARKETS WORK A SKI SEASON HEINEKEN CUP

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A HUGE SUCCESS AS THOUSANDS SNAP TNT people, you are a legend.

Or, to be more accurate, several thousand legends.

With the 1000 free tickets we issued for September’s TNT Travel Show and a load more handed out by the exhibitors all snapped up in no time, you continued to roll up in your thousands. We’re thinking of asking TfL for a contribution to thank you all for keeping the Northern Line and Angel Tube station so busy all day.

Our exhibitors had some nice things to say about you too. Here’s an example (we’ll spare his blushes, but thanks Dan): “It’s been hard for everyone in the industry these last few months but you still managed to put on a great show and you are certainly getting the right people along on the day. Cheers guys, I can’t wait for the March show.”

If you were at the show as a visitor or an exhibitor, a big ‘thank you’ for

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coming along. If you weren’t, there’s always the big one, again at the mega Business Design Centre, Islington, on March 9. 2014. Get it in the diary now and you can consider next summer’s trips as good as booked.

Talking of which, we know someone who has it all sewn up already. That’s Lauren Hunter, our big Lucky Dip winner from the September show. The £3500 worth of holidays she won will see her going off to Egypt with Travel Talk; enjoying a six-stop Flexi Pass with Busabout, discovering Nepal with Encounters Travel, going on a Sky High tour with Haggis Adventures; seven days Greek sailing with Med Sailors, a tour of Southern Ireland with Paddywagon; a Southern Rocker tour with Shamrocker, a TruThai tour with TruTravels, and 17 days in Africa with a mate courtesy of Absolute Africa.

Enjoy Lauren. And thanks again!

THE TNT TRAVEL WINNER OFSHOW LUCKY DIP

Lauren Hunter

WINNER Taryn Skorjenko Taryn Skorjenko won an 11-day Winter Express with topdeck

WINNER Paul Sletten Paul Sletten won a £100 voucher as a VIP ticket holder. This could be you next Travel Show

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Laura Mcmullen, Mary Lee Allan, Emma Robinson, Kelly Lindsay & Catie Norman all won a myTNT VIP membership as a Fast Track ticket holder

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WINNER Adam Austin, Jessica Gramp, Kate Ramsay all won a ÂŁ50 travel voucher as a Fast Track ticket holder To claim your prizes email caroline.penn@tntmagazine.com

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Become a myTNT VIP for access to fantastic freebies, huge discounts and heaps of benefits. For just £50, joining our new members club will give you the chance to do more in London and beyond for less. For full details see tntmagazine.com/myTNT-VIP

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CAROL DRIVER ACTING EDITOR carol.driver@tntmagazine.com

EDITOR’S LETTER Wow. We are all so impressive by the huge amount of incredibly keen travellers who turned out to our Travel Show last week to bag you-won’t-get-anywhere-else bargains. We couldn’t have done it without you! And if our show has whet your appetite for all-things further afield, check out this week’s travel section – we go in search of whisky in Scotland (P36), exploring Italy (P42), and rev our engines to take on Bolivia’s salt flats. Enjoy!

THIS WEEK LONDONDIARY LONDONLISTINGS

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DRINK

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FOOD

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LONDON SOUND

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CHATROOM

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LONDON SCENE

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LIFESTYLE

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NEWS

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SPORT NEWS

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SPORT FEATURE

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TRAVEL

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DIARY

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NEWS

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UK TRIP

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TIPS

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HOTSHOTS

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TOP 5

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SHORTBREAK

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COMPETITION

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BIG TRIP

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EYES ON THE PRIZE

CLASSIFIEDS

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Controversy aside, the Heineken Cup is one of the great tournaments in rugby

FEATURES SHAKEN, NOT STIRRED

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We check out London Cocktail Week and get the lowdown on the perfect martini

SLOPING OFF

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Fancy working a ski season in Europe?

Here’s how to nail that dream job

A WEE DRAM!

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36

We’ll do anything for a decent drop of whisky – even heading to a remote island

ROLL UP!

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Photos: Getty; Thinkstock

Even if you don’t have spare cash while travelling, these are must-see markets

SALTED!

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Engines ready! TNT makes the bumpy journey across Bolivia’s salt flats

30 TNTMAGAZINE.COM

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Editorial Acting editor Carol Driver Contributors: Michael Gadd l Alasdair Morton Caroline Garnar l Andrew Westbrook l Andy Jones

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EDITORIAL ENQUIRIES 0203 011 1066 To contact the various editorial departments via email please use the following email addresses: entertainment.desk@tntmagazine.com lifestyle.desk@tntmagazine.com sport.desk@tntmagazine.com travel.desk@tntmagazine.com

Tasty: Rumfest has 400 rums to sample

SALES/MARKETING/EVENTS Sales manager Jaqui Ward Phone 020 3137 5950 Email jaqui.ward@tntmagazine.com Sales Executive Matt Syder Phone 0207 9890491 Email matt.syder@tntmagazine.com For all general enquiries please call 0207 989 0567 or email sales@tntmagazine.com Design / production Head of design and production Lisa Ferron Phone 01225 442062 Email lisa.ferron@tntmagazine.com Design / picture editor Patricia Montenegro Phone 0203 011 1066 Email patricia.montenegro@tntmagazine.com Subscriptions / Distribution Manager Caroline Penn Phone 01603 559004 Email caroline.penn@tntmagazine.com ACCOUNTS Emma Overton Email emma.overton@tntmagazine.com STARTRACK MEDIA LTD Directors Kevin Ellis, Ken Hurst Stuart Bidgood Publisher Startrack Media Limited Distribution Emblem Direct Ltd Printed by Wyndeham Peterborough Limited News AAP Pictures Getty Images, TNT Images, Thinkstock TNT Magazine , 114 Coppergate House, 16 Brune Street, London E1 7NJ tntmagazine.com

Shhh... SECRET LONDON rumfest docklands

The tastes of the Caribbean come to the Docklands this weekend as part of Rumfest, the annual event celebrating the rum experience for drinkers and aficionados alike.

There will be more than 400 rums to sample – not that we’re suggesting you try them all over the weekend – as well as cocktail demos, a food market and live music too, including salsa, soca, reggae, zouk and samba. There will also be a chance to win a holiday to the Caribbean and a visit to a real rum distillery for a few lucky folk. £25

October 12 & 13, 12pm-5pm 1 Western Gateway, E16 1XL

Prince Regent

rumfest.co.uk

Where to get TNT

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All thieves of TNT bins will be prosecuted.

TNT Magazine is printed on paper from sustainable forests. There is no business connection between the proprietors of this magazine and TNT Ltd, the worldwide transportation group. Copyright here and abroad of all original materials is held by TNT Magazine.

Reproduction in whole or part is forbidden, except with permission of the publishers.

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blitz party

cocoon

reggie watts

The Village Underground becomes a 1940s war-time bunker this evening with music dancing and loads more. The Spitfire bar will be on hand to quench your thirst, with ‘rations books’ replacing the more usual menu. With sandbags and searchlights, it’ll be a night out unlike any other.

This interactive exhibition at the Natural History Museum brings you up close and personal with nature and its wondrous beauty like never before, with a self-guided tour introducing you to specimens, displays and interactive activities that bring nature to life.

Illuminating and exciting.

The impressively coiffeurred Watts returns to London after his grandstanding show at Yoko Ono’s Meltdown fest earlier this year, and brings his musical comedy genius improv with him. If you haven’t seen or heard Watts’ mighty impressive talent before, now’s the time to put that right.

Sat, Oct 12, from 8pm Village Underground, EC2A 3PQ Liverpool Street theblitzparty.com

Daily, 10am-5pm Cromwell Road, SW7 5BD South Kensington nhm.ac.uk

October 8 & 9, 7.30pm Queen Elizabeth Hall, SE1 8XX Waterloo southbankcentre.co.uk

£20

FREE

£22

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Just for laffs: Irish stand-ups take to the stage

LONDON IRISH COMEDY FESTIVAL North London

A veritable who’s who of Irish comedy talent comes to town this week for a three-day celebration of giggles and laughs. There will be everyone from established names to up-and-coming talent to those about to break, including Andrew Maxwell, Abandoman, Aisling Bea (above), Neil Delamere, PJ Gallagher, Barry Murphy, Maeve Higgins and loads more. Tickets will go fast though so best get in there. £10+

October 11-13, times vary London Irish Centre, NW1 9XB

musicglue.com

BRITISH POSTAL MUSEUM

SCIFI LONDON

One of the city’s best-kept secrets, this free exhibition looks at the development of the famous British red pillar boxes at the larger site in Debden, and stamps, artwork, post office records and promotional posters and the like featured at the central London site in Farringdon. Fascinating.

There will be all manner of movies screenings at this weekend event, featuring everyone from the likes of creepy genre director Vincenzo Natali’s Haunter to sci-fi action flicks starring legendary bruiser Dolph Lundgren. There will be all-nighters and quiz nights as well for the die-hards.

Mon-Fri, 10am-5pm. Selected Sat, 10am-5pm Freeling House, WC1X 0DL Farringdon postalheritage.org.uk

October 11-13, times vary Stratford Picturehouse, E15 1BX Stratford sci-fi-london.com

FREE

Photos: Karla Gowlett

Camden Town

£8.50+

What will you do with your two weeks?

Volunteer in our clinical trials and help beat colds and flu!

Play games, read, watch TV, study or surf the internet and we’ll compensate you for your time – up to £3750.

Register now at

FluCamp.com

Crazy for cocktails London Cocktail Week will bring a wealth of pop-up bars, special events and, of course, fabulous drinks to town Words alasdair morton London is set to go cocktail crazy for the next seven days as London Cocktail Week shuns beers, turns its nose up at wines, and focuses on the glitz and glamour of the world of mixology.

The annual event aims to inspire, educate and unite London’s cocktail lovers and will be loaded full of pop-up bars, tours, tastings, parties, masterclasses and seminars, so you’ll get to learn how to make the perfect cocktail and, of course, sample one or two eye-catching, tastebud-delighting new drinks along the way.

The cocktail tours will take in more than 100 bars around town. To help you get to all of them – well, maybe not all of them – there will be special vintage London Cocktail Week Routemaster buses to hop on for free.

Grab a £10 wristband, and you’ll get discounted drinks at all of them, too.

Iconic Seven Dials in Covent Garden will be the focus for the event, with the famous streets taking on a party atmosphere all week long.

There will even be a cocktail shop, where visitors can get the lowdown on where to go for the best drinks, and 8

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also pick up some ingredients to help you put your skills to the test at home.

And with that in mind, TNT caught up with the head barman, Alessandro Palazzi, at the famous Dukes Bar at the legendary boutique Dukes Hotel in Mayfair, to quiz him on all-things cocktail. Frequented by James Bond author, Ian Fleming, the bar is said to have provided the inspiration for the famous 007 line, “shaken, not stirred”.

Being the head barman at an establishment that has been praised for making one of the world’s top martinis, Palazzi knows his stuff. So what is the secret to making the perfect cocktail?

“Using good quality ingredients,” Palazzi tells us.

“Never use an artificial ingredient.

Always serve a cocktail that is very, very cold – keep your glasses in the fridge or the freezer before serving.”

Palazzi has been making the finest cocktails for 40 years now, but it’s not all about making the best martini or cosmopolitan, it’s just as much about confounding expectations and concocting something new that will surprise people.

“I look to add one or two unusual ingredients that people [sometimes] forget about,” Palazzi says of some of the tricks he employs.

“For example, Strega, a once very popular Italian liquor. I also look for products from small distilleries that aren’t well-known rather than the big suppliers. I always use fresh fruits or herbs that are in season, too.”

There’s more though to being a cocktail master than just knowing what to put in the glass.

“I’m a bartender and always will be a bartender,” Palazzi enthuses.

“In order to become a bartender you have to be diplomatic, acrobatic, charismatic and fully knowledgeable.”

All characteristics that Palazzi has in spades, we can attest.

So embrace the cocktails during this week-long booze fest, and leave the beers to one side.

MORE DRINKS EVENTS ›› London Cocktail Week. October 7-13. £10+ Seven Dials, Covent Garden, WC2 Covent Garden diffordsguide.co.uk

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Master: Duke’s Bar’s Alessandro Palazzi

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The Hub: this year’s Cocktail Week shop

Shaken, not stirred: learn how to make the best martini

diplomatico indulgence soho

three martinis lunch covent garden

What could be more indulgent than this?

Diplomatico rum will be hosting a pairing evening in which rum cocktails are combined with delicious choccies from the sublime Hotel Chocolat.

Not one to share with the boss! The Portobello Road Gin No. 171 Pop-Up Parlour at the Seven Dials Club will be laying on a couple of three-martini lunches, in which you pop in for an hour, sample three martinis that show the cocktail’s diversity, then nip back to the office.

£30

£30

Oct 9, 7pm-9pm Hotel Chocolat, 4 Monmouth Street, WC2H 9HB Tottenham Court Road hotelchocolat.com

Oct 11 & 12, 12pm-1pm The Seven Dials Club, 42 Earlham Street, WC2H 9LA Covent Garden sevendialsclub.com

inside the remy room leicester square If you’re going to learn, then who better to learn from than the best? Remy Martin are hosting this series of masterclasses in which expert mixologists will reveal some of the secrets to making the perfect cocktail.

Guests will include the founder of Bolongaro Trevor and All Saints bar, Stuart Trevor, as well as Matt Green, the head barman at the Opium cocktail and dim sum bar, located in the heart of the city. £15

Oct 7-13, times vary W1D 6JA Leicester Square

drink what you sow: foraging special soho The famous cocktail bar Reverend JW Simpson in Fitrovia will be hosting a very special cocktail evening that combines luxurious drinks with ingredients foraged from nature’s garden, including edible plants, berries, nuts and flowers.

You’ll be given the chance to create something truly special and one-of-a-kind as you combine spirits and liquors and the like with ingredients you won’t find sitting on the shelf in the supermarket. One for cocktail and foraging enthusiasts and for those who want to try something a little bit different. £30

Oct 26, 7pm-9pm 32 Goodge Street, W1T 2QJ Goodge Street revjwsimpson.com

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opiumchinatown.com

vestel voyages kings cross

china tang lunch hyde park

Taking place on a 50ft classic canal boat, these rides along the Regent’s canal are accompanied by Vestel Vodka cocktails infused with American oaks, sherry woods, juniper and more.

Enjoy cocktail week in style with this three-course Asian inspired lunch at the luscious China Tang restaurant at The Dorchester, with accompanying cocktails.

£25

Oct 7 -13, 4pm-12am (rides are an hour long) Granary Square, N1C 4AA King’s Cross diffordsguide.com

absolute weird science borough

£20

Oct 7-13, 12pm-5pm The Dorchester, 53 Park Lane, W1K 1QA Hyde Park Corner diffordguide.co.uk

midori manicures covent garden

Absolute vodka will be serving up prime cocktails during this far-out evening to accompany a viewing of the late John Hughes’ 1980s fantasy cult classic movie Weird Science, in which two geeks create their own dream woman.

Midori will bring a very special event to town as part of cocktail week. They’ve teamed up with Model’s Own beauty store to bring three exclusive nail polishes which you can sample at Foundation Bar, while supping on on glam melon ball Midori cocktails.

Oct 8, 8pm-12am Roxy Bar, SE1 1LB Borough roxybarandscreen.com

Oct 11-12, 5.30pm-9.30pm WC2H 9JA Covent Garden foundation-bar.co.uk

£7

£9

known your martini covent garden Belvedere Vodka will be the hosts for this pop-up bar in Covent Garden, which will educate guests about the martini, from its humble beginnings to its place now as one of the most glamorous and popular cocktails in the world. There will also be tips on how to make your own, and samples including signature martinis such as the Classic Belvedere Martini and the Mont Blanc Martini, to enjoy as well.

Deliciously illuminating. £20

Oct 7-13, 1pm-11pm.

Masterclasses: Mon-Fri, 7pm-8pm. Sat, 3pm-4pm & 5pm-6pm. Sun, 3pm-4pm 38 Earlham Street, WC1H Covent Garden diffordsguide.com

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Tell us a story: The Book Club’s new sibling, Stories

BAR

The ever-popular Book Club has opened a sister property called Stories (see what they did there?). Despite being the younger sibling, it is arguably the more sophisticated: there is no club section in this spot, billed instead as a bar, cafe and gallery. On the night we paid a visit, the easy-on-the-ears soul, rhythm and blues music came courtesy of a live band and the clientele mainly consisted of couples, small groups of friends and a few lone laptoppers. This was a Monday night, however, and we suspect the industrial-style space (with a ‘jungle’ in the corner and padded cushions hanging from the walls to soften things up) fills up with a livelier crowd on the weekends. Plus, the open doors allowing you to spill out onto Broadway Market makes it a great spot for warm evenings.

THE GRUB The bar snacks are great shared tapas-style – aim for two dishes each. The wild mushroom and mozzarella risotto balls were dense and gooey, the marinated halloumi fat and delicious and the chimichurri chicken drumsticks tender and spicy. Dishes are £4-£5. Our one complaint? Too much salt on, well, everything.

THE SCENE

We loved the spiked smoothies – although now we’re tempted to add bourbon to our next morning ‘health-kick’. The creative cocktails and craft beers also add a nice sense of ‘these guys know their stuff’ to proceedings.

VERDICT Stories will do The Book Club proud.

BEHIND THE BAR

30-32 Broadway Market, E8 4QJ

storiesonbroadway.com

London Fields

WATERMELON MOJITO CHOCBERRY MARTINI PLUM PIE CRUSH

3 OF THE BEST COCKTAILS

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We love a mojito, but this one with a watermelon twist is king of them all – as well as one of your five a day. Fresh watermelon, limes and mint are crushed together with a large dash of Cuban rum, brown sugar and crushed ice. jewelpiccadilly.co.uk

A pudding and cocktail in one, Absolut vodka is shaken with blackberry liqueur, fresh cream, blackberry and raspberry purée and chocolate liqueur, served straight up with a powdering of chocolate. Er, yum. grace-bar.co.uk

This tastes as delicious as it sounds: Havana Club 7yr rum is shaken with small batch plum jam, pomegranate and fresh lime juice, served long, over crushed ice. We’ve certainly got a crush on this cocktail (boom boom tish). thegable.co.uk

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ing 40 years t a r b e l !

Ce 1973-2013

40th Anniversary Gala Ball Tickets now on sale!

Topdeck celebrates its 40th anniversary on Saturday 9th November The ethos and spirit of Topdeck hasn’t changed since day one: fiercely independent, with a passion to travel the globe and a desire to break the mould in the travel industry.

Come and join us on a unique opportunity to celebrate this special occasion. The evening will be a fantastic trip down memory lane for all that have experienced the spirit of Topdeck.

Funds raised on the night will go to Topdeck’s preferred charity Centrepoint www.centrepoint.org.uk

The fun details

The finer details

•

Welcome drinks reception

When:

•

Formal sit down 3-course dinner with wine Evening entertainment, led by a fabulous 5-piece band

•

Incredible anecdotes and humorous stories told by some of our special guests

6:45pm–12:00am Where: The Tower Hotel, St Katharine’s Way, London E1W 1LD Dress:

Formal

Cost:

£90pp

Book by Friday 18th October as ‘Friends of Topdeck’ at www.topdeck.travel/ball

TOPDECK 1973

2013

CEL

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Saturday 9th November,

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BITE SIZE

Yum: it’s more than just brekkie at this new opening

Knowledge is power As part of London Cocktail Week, Hendricks Carnival of Knowledge is holding two weird but wonderful foodie events to help line your stomachs for all that cocktail drinking.

A Surrealist Supper offers a “culinary voyage” at the hands of the talented chefs at The Clove Club, served in the opulent surrounds of 33 Fitzroy Square (Oct 11 & 12, 7.30-11pm, £65).

Alternatively enjoy a Sunday lunch in 2063, where an award-winning mixologist and the founder of the Rebel Dining Society present a curious culinary collaboration like no other, set 50 years in the future (Oct 13, 7-8.30pm, £20 for talk and cocktails, dinner charged seperately). hendricksgin.com/carnivalofknowledge

can you take the heat?

Franks Hot Sauce is running a Great Wing Challenge this Sunday. The London heat (pun intended) will take place between 1-10pm at StickyWings, Brick Lane. For an entry fee of £10, contenders are challenged to eat as many wings as possible in five minutes.

Get through to the final and you could win a prize of £1500. battleofbones.eventbrite.co.uk

dim sum yum This newly opened dim sum restaurant in Chelsea has quite a pedigree to its name – head chef Kai Wang has worked at some of the most prestigious restaurants in London including the Grand Imperial.

The menu mixes traditional and contemporary – we can’t wait to sample the snow crab, coriander and water chestnut. Dim-sum-yum!

the breakfast club BRITISH

This fifth and latest addition to The Breakfast Club sees them venture south into Battersea. The colourful interior mixes brash ’50s rock ‘n’ roll flair with ’80s British cafe inspiration, which sounds garish but is a winning design. Spacious and open plan, with a large outdoor seating space as well, it is great whether you’re grabbing a snack and a pint, or want a three-course dinner.

The grub It is famed locally already for its breakfasts and brunch menu – the full English especially. But we opt to try out its dinner menu. A chorizo and lemon and grilled halloumi starter is palette-whetting and merely serves to get us more excited about the mains to come. My partner opts for a pulled pork burrito, which is laden with beans, cheese and tastes galore. Having been recommended by a friend, I opt for the already-legendary cow vs pig burger which, as the name suggests, is a monster. An organic steak patty jostles for dominance with a pulled pork topping as cheese spills out the sides. It is a beast of a burger and totally deserves its much-revered status. Stuffed almost to bursting, we opt to share a banoffee pie dessert, which nearly breaks our poor stomachs. It has been, though, totally worth it in every way.

THE SCENE

There are teas, coffees and fresh juices, alongside cocktails, beers, ciders and wine. We loved our Joe’s organic tea (£2) which was a refreshing and healthy way to round out our calorific indulgence.

Bill please Teas and coffees from £2; juices from £3.50; wine from £5.50 by the glass/ £16 by the bottle; beer from £4; cocktails from £8. verdict This new venture south of the river has proved instantly to be a hit with the locals and it is easy to see why – it is full of style, fun and food to go crazy for.

With a friendly, relaxed vibe, it’s welcoming, and caters for all, whether you want a hangover-curing breakfast, a light bite on the way home from work, or, as we sampled, a calorie-laden onslaught. A top new addition to Battersea.

Behind the bar

bolangrestaurant.co.uk 5-9 Battersea Rise, SW11 1HG

thebreakfastclubcafes.com

Clapham Junction

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Family focussed: Emily Barker thinks of home

ALASDAIR MORTON FOR THE RECORD The way we consume music is changing, we all know that. Even Tame Impala’s Kevin Parker has waxed lyrical about it. But his approach on confronting this new horizon has taken a strange turn. Speaking out about how writing a follow up to mega smash Lonerism isn’t getting him jacked up, and how they are so many ways to make and listen to music in the digital age other than the 12-track LP, you could be forgiven for thinking he was going to take on a download single approach, or a pay-what-you want Radiohead stance maybe. So what does he have in mind next? A joint EP with autumn US tour mates The Flaming Lips, in which each band covers two of the other’s track. The EP, a vinyl that you can buy and actually hold in your hand, will then be sold at their four US shows. There is something utterly retro and glorious about the whole endeavour. Might need to get over there and grab a copy.

EMILY BARKER AND THE RED CLAY HAL0 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, W12 8TT TUE, OCT 16 | DOORS AT 7PM | £15+

Emily Barker’s been playing her trade in catchy, soulful folk for a number of years now and with the release of her fourth LP Dear River her success has soared.

Aussie Barker arrived on these shores more than ten years ago, back in 2002, where she set up camp in Cambridge. Initially she formed band The Low Country with guitarist Rob Jackson, and they released two albums in the early Noughties, 2003’s Welcome To The Low Country and its follow up a year later, The Dark Road.

It was after this though that Barker’s career itself would take a turn in the road.

Barker started work in 2005 on her debut solo album, Photos. Fires. Fables, which would not only announce her arrival as a solo performer, but would unite her with her then all-female backing trio, The Red Clay Halos.

Since this career-changing moment, Barker and her Halos have released three further albums, 2008’s Despite The Snow and 2011’s Almanac, steadily building on their fanbase with each passing release. The sales kept getting stronger, the shows bigger, and with this year’s Dear River this ascendancy has continued unabated.

The album saw Barker casting her eye and thoughts homeward, considering the nature of family and home and what constitutes it, especially for one who has now set up camp on the other side of the world. It is, simply, her masterpiece making this show an extra special treat. Don’t miss.

Shepherd’s Bush

16

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o2shepherdsbushempire.co.uk

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NEW BAND

mgmt GIG weds, oct 16. 7pm £22.50

The first of two decidedly ace duos to hit London this week, Brooklyn’s Ben Goldwasser and Andrew Van Wyngarden, aka MGMT, come to play a triumphant show at the Forum. The psychrock-electro duo are one of the most intriguing bands of the last few years and will be showing everyone why they’re one of indie’s most loved.

Kentish Town Forum 9-17 Highgate Road, NW5 1JY Kentish Town theforumlondon.com

belgian booms

mirrorball

CLUB

CLUB

sat, oct 12. 9pm-3aM £5

sat, oct 12. 11pm-2am £6

A night of music and screenings celebrating Belgian electronic music, this country-specific party features everything from the new beat artists of the Eighties through to the latest electro, techno and house artists. The tunes come from Goldfinch, Surfing Leons, DJ Slow, Richelle and Sagat.

Much loved south London venue, The Bedford, has enjoyed a little bit of a facelift of late. As well as all the exciting goings on that have been taking place there, though, it still hosts this impossibly fun weekly night playing all the top club classics from the last four decades. Get down and dance!

Birthdays 33-35 Stoke Newington Road, N16 8BJ Dalston Kingsland birthdaysdalston.com

The Bedford 77 Bedford Hill, SW12 9HD Balham thebedford.co.uk

ramona flowers The buzz so far Their bristling electro-pop-rock has seen this Bristol-based group tour with Bastille and have had Hot Chip and Everything Everything remix them.

They have a couple of EPs, Lust and Lies and Dismantle, out already, and latest single Brighter – a stomping, get under your skin and lodge itself in your psyche, instant hit – shows their sounds are made for the main stage fame. The critics love them, and you will too. Trust us.

The Critics say “Hugeness may be imminent” Paul Lester, The Guardian

is out now on Distiller Records. They play Electrowerks, Oct 14. £7 7 Torrens Street, EC1V 1NQ Angel theramaonaflowers.com

Photos: Getty

the plug Brighter

jagwar ma

night train

bastille

GIG

CLUB

GIG

weds, oct 23. 7.30pm £12.50

sat, oct 12. 10pm-11am £13+

oct 15 & 16. 7pm £30+

Jono Ma and Gabriel Winterfield have a big show next year at the Electric Brixton, but for the lucky few – or those with a large bank balance they can use to prise a ticket from a greedy tout – they are playing cuts from their rock-meetsdance debut, this year’s Howlin’, at this ultraintimate north London show. Sure to stun.

This new night at the celebrated north London club makes its focus all about bringing together legendary global stars with the up and coming talent shaking things up and the stars who will be making waves in the future. This launch night features Infinity Ink, Mind Against, Him_Self_Her and Dudley Strangeways.

Fast rising south London multi-instrumentalist talented git Bastille became the first Brit in three years to hit the number one spot with his debut, Bad Blood. He smashed it at festivals all summer and is back to show why he is one of the most exciting talents out there. Top tip – tickets will go fast for this one so get in there fast.

Scala 275 Pentonville Road, N1 9NL King’s Cross scala-london.co.uk

Egg 200 York Way, King’s Cross, N7 9AX King’s Cross egglondon.net

Brixton Academy 211 Stockwell Road, Brixton, SW9 9SL Brixton o2academybrixton.co.uk

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17

Exclusive UK show

HAYLEY

WESTENRA plus very special guest

JONATHAN ANSELL Compton Ave London N1 2XD Doors 7pm / unreserved seating

EXCLUSIVE UK SHOW FROM GERMAN MEDIEVAL METAL BAND

wed 11 december 2013 LONDON

O2 ACADEMY ISLINGTON

www.inextremo.de

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A SCHONEBERG CONCERTS & TIDAL CONCERTS PRESENTATION

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Claudia O’Doherty The Sydney comedian on celebrity, baffling technology and what she misses most about back home INTERVIEW alasdair morton

Tell us what your recent show Pioneer is all about?

It’s a high-tech extravaganza about showbusiness, corporate sponsorship and talent.

The show involves a number of hologram versions of alternative ‘Claudias’ – how much fun was that?

It was pretty embarrassing because the studio was in a production company’s office. So while I stood there dressed as myself as a six-year-old, people doing their jobs were peering over the computers with pity and confusion in their eyes.

Your 2011 show was about soil erosion, last year’s about a one-woman show that falls apart – where did the initial idea for Pioneer come from?

A friend sent me a supercut [video] of a keynote for a technology company at the beginning of the year. It was incredibly technically spectacular but what they were talking about was very boring and awkward, which I found really funny.

I decided I wanted the show to look and be like that.

How much does Pioneer draw on your own career in its tale of a struggling artist making a pact with a large firm to aid her quest for greatness?

Very little. The basic facts are the same, I’m Australian, technically in showbusiness and I’m not famous. Apart from that, it’s all made up.

Have the firm said anything about your use of them in the show and have you ever been involved in any product placement support gigs?

Pioneer have said nothing. I did genuinely contact them before I started doing the show, but they ignored me. When I was in university I was in a sketch show that was sponsored by V, which is an energy drink like Red Bull.

How do you write your shows? Do you have an initial idea and work from that or do they grow organically?

A combination of the two. I usually have one big idea, but also spend a long time thinking of stupid small things, and then figuring out how to fit that into the big thing.

Pioneering comedy: Claudia O’Doherty plays London October 18 There are loads of Australian comedians breaking through right now – what’s fuelling this particularly fruitful period?

I have no idea. I think generally comedy is very popular right now, and Australian comedy is just part of that.

What is the strangest question you have ever been asked?

One: are women funny? Two: is that your real hair?

And what have you never been asked that you wish someone would?

It’s so beautiful I assume it’s synthetic...

You have described your comedy as ‘high-octane stupidity’ – have there ever been any ideas that you have found too outlandish?

I’d like to be rigged up to cables so I could do an entire show suspended over an audience, but I think the harness would be too uncomfortable.

You’ve won Best Newcomer and Best Comedy gongs before at the Melbourne International Comedy Fest and Fringe – what does this praise mean to you?

In practical terms it meant I got more press and there was money attached to them which meant I could do more shows. Awards for something

as subjective as comedy are pretty ridiculous, but they’re a good, tangible thing to tell your grandmother about.

What is the oddest gig you have ever done and why?

My second show, What Is Soil Erosion? was invited to be part of a festival about climate change in Brisbane. I performed the show in the state library in Queensland and it was introduced by the Premier. It’s a really dumb show that contains no information about soil erosion.

How did you end up there?

I said yes because they asked.

What three things do you miss about Australia the most when over here?

The nice weather, my family and my Australian friends.

You sing a tribute to Sydney suburb of Glebe in Pioneer – what are you most proud of?

[Restaurant] Thai on Wok. Claudia O’Doherty is touring the UK on The Invisible Dot’s New Wave Tour, alongside Jamie Demetrieu and Liam Williams. They play The Bloomsbury, October 18. £10+ WC1H 0AH Euston Square theinvisbledot.com

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19

LONDONSCENE

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Brave: the story behind the life of late photojournalist Tim Hetherington

which way is the front line from here?

FILM review by Alasdair Morton Starring: Tim Hetherington | TBC | 79mins

the fifth estate FILM Starring: Bendict Cumberbath | 15 | 124mins

Benedict Cumberbatch (still the best name in Hollywood!) stars as Julian Assange in this story of the WikiLeaks founder and the repercussions around the globe of his releasing of classified documents pertaining to governments worldwide. Sure to lift the lid on this most controversial figure.

On general release October 11

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This moving and enlightening documentary shines a new light on the life and career of photojournalist and filmmaker Tim Hetherington, who was killed covering the Libyan conflict in 2011.

Directed by his friend and co-director Sebastian Junger on the 2010 Oscarnominated documentary Restrepo, about life embedded with a unit of US soldiers in the Korengal valley in Afghanistan, this is a moving portrait of the man who endangered his life in some of the world’s most dangerous conflict zones but also of an individual driven by the men and people behind the scenes of these conflicts.

Featuring previous interviews with Hetherington himself as well as with his family and girlfriend and Junger’s narration, it shows what drove Hetherington to risk life and limb to tell the tales of the people involved in these war zones around the world – this was his focus rather than just the violence and action shots that so typically typify this genre of photojournalism.

In exploring the camaraderie of soldiers, Hetherington battled to show their experiences and what motivates them, as well as illustrating their position as pawns in a larger game. This compassion and objectivity comes across strongest in Junger’s film, alongside the loss felt by his death to both those who knew, loved and worked with him. A powerful portrait of a determined man.

Good for: Understanding what drove a man to risk his life to tell the tales of others.

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GIVE US A

deborah franceswhite

GIGGLE!

COMEDY

The ace stand-up’s new show, Half A Can Of Worms, tells of her adoption at the age of ten weeks old and how a chance discovery lead her on the path to finding out about her birth mother. Told with wit, insight and an emotional wallop, it is a revealing, life-affirming show you’ll not want to miss.

Rada Studios 16 Chenies Street, WC1E 7PA. Oct 4, 22 7 23. £10+ Goodge Street rada.ac.uk

only in england

hysteria

EXHIBITION

THEATRE

The eccentricities of the English are captured wholesale in this new exhibition which brings together work from Tony Ray-Jones, who captured 1960s society, and Martin Parr, who photographed the odd activities and social norms of the following decade. A great way to see exactly who you are living amongst.

Playwright and director Terry Johnson combines fact with farce, psychology with sadness in his entertaining revival of his 1993 play which elaborates imaginatively on a brief meeting between Sigmund Freud and Salvador Dali with a case history for the former to unravel. An intelligent but playful production. LK

Science Museum SW7 2DD. Until Mar 14, 2014. £8 South Kensington sciencemuseum.org.uk

Hampstead Theatre Eton Avenue, NW3 3EU. Until Oct 12. £22+ Swiss Cottage hampsteadtheatre.com

Tiernan Douieb What’s this week’s set going to be about? Probably about spiders, Sigur Ros, being old, the government, Norway, crime and how the internet is too loud sometimes.

However I am easily distracted.

Photos: Simon Annand

What’s the funniest thing you have seen? It’s a toss up between the squirrel I saw eating a Cornetto like a human, a man on a train who looked like a sad clown, Jeremy Hunt nearly killing someone by ringing a bell like an idiot, my friend being unable to open a door, or a small picture of a peanut that for no apparent reason made me and my brother laugh when we were kids.

Stand up is amazing but nothing is as funny as odd moments in life.

machete kills

much ado about nothing

FILM

THEATRE

Starring the oddest leading man, Danny Trejo, this sequel to the original spin off from a fake movie trailer in Grindhouse, sees the titular man mountain back killing people and dropping one liners as he is hired by Charlie Sheen’s President to stop Mel Gibson’s arms dealer. Yes, you have read that right – excellently bonkers and total madness.

Verbally sparring Beatrice and Benedick have been portrayed as middle-aged before, but octogenarian James Earl Jones is implausible as a serving soldier wooing Vanessa Redgrave’s still sprightly Beatrice. Shakespeare’s comedy is moved to 1940s rural England but the comic interludes go for little. LK

On general release October 11

Old Vic Theatre The Cut, SE1 8NB. Until Nov 30. £11+ Waterloo oldvictheatre.com

Where was your first show? At a bar in Kent University in 2002 with awful material about being diabetic and only 5’5”. My first proper show was in Greenwich in 2003 with awful material about being diabetic and only 5’5”. If you’re lucky, you might still see me at a gig doing that material just with better fake confidence.

We Love Comedy, Brixton. Oct 16. £4+ Effra Social, SW2 1DF Brixton tiernandouieb.co.uk

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21

LIFESTYLECAREERS

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Spare time: spend your out-of-work hours boarding

Go out on the piste Winter’s rolling in, so swap your nights on the sofa for days on the slopes by spending the snowy season working up a mountain It’s billed as a life-changing time during which you’ll make new BFFs, improve your skiing or snowboarding and spend months in the fresh mountain air. For many people, working a ski season is a dream job – earning while playing in the white stuff for up to six hours a day. But it’s not all fun and frolics – you do have to earn your keep, and don’t expect that to be a lot.

The most popular job on the slopes is a chalet host. You’ll be responsible for cleaning as well as preparing breakfast and cooking dinner.

You work shift hours (usually 7am to 10am and then 5pm to 9.30pm) with one day off a week. And, on transfer days, you’ll be expected to get up at the crack of dawn to scrub the chalet from top to bottom. “Getting up early 22

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to cook guests’ breakfasts, usually after a few drinks and only a few hours’ sleep, or cleaning the whole chalet on transfer day were the worst parts of the job,” says Richard Hudson, who manned a 30-person chalet for Esprit Ski in La Rosière, France.

“It is hard work, the days are long and you don’t get much time for yourself,” Hudson, 24, from Chalk Farm, adds. “So be sure you can deal with a hectic lifestyle before signing up.

“But I’d do it again in a heartbeat.

I still rate it as probably the best six months of my life – and I was on the slopes nearly every day.

“Being a chalet host gives you more time on the slopes than any other resort job. Coupled with awesome nightlife, you’ve got an ideal job.”

As your main duty will be caring for guests, making sure they’re well-fed every day, put yourself ahead of other candidates by booking on to a cookery course, which shows you’re able to cater for large groups.

The pay varies, but, as a chalet host, you can expect to take home about £80 per week. For David Miller, it wasn’t about the money, but all about getting time on the slopes. Miller, 28, worked two seasons, in Tignes, France, and St Anton, Austria, for Skiworld.

“Your accommodation, food, lift pass, insurance, ski hire and any lessons you want are all provided,” he says.

“At the beginning of my first season I could just about stand up. By the end, I was going over jumps popping backside 3s. It is the best environment

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Board buddies: you will make friends for life

On the job rytis

vitkauskas

Career YPlan Cofounder and CEO Age 29 Lives New York and London from Lithuania

Photos: Thinkstock

Host with the most: you’ll have to keep your guets fed and watered to ski since the age of to learn in, as your Say what? workmates will teach A natives.co.uk survey reveals funny five, but never having snowboarded. Now I’m you to snowboard and seasonaire customer queries: a better snowboarder put the time in to make than skier. sure you pick it up and – Can you make the skis less “The pay was progress quickly.” slippery? I keep sliding backwards If you don’t fancy enough for beer when I try to get to the lift queue. being a host almost money, and the – I’d like to try snowboarding but 24/7, there are plenty contract included I’m comfortable on my skis, could of other positions accommodation and you just fasten them together for available. Ski reps are food, so that’s all I me with Sellotape instead? sought-after. As the needed. I’d definitely do – Is there anything you can do main point of contact it again, it was one of about this weather/snow? for guests, you’ll be the happiest times – Is that a gluten-free toaster? dealing with problems, – Do you have a hosepipe ban here of my life.” as well as arranging at the moment?

As a travel fan, you après-ski events. In to – So if it’s winter in New Zealand could find yourself on beauty? Therapists and when it’s summer in America, what the slopes anywhere in masseuses often find month is it there? the world. In Europe, work, taking care of France is the most aching limbs. Or you can train to be popular option, while it’s cheaper to live in Austria. Wannabe pros tend to a ski/snowboard instructor; work in head to Switzerland, but expect the a bar or a restaurant as a chef or a cost of living to be high. waiter in a resort; bag a job driving; And it’s not just months of a jolly or get involved at a managerial level. that will count against your career.

Leila Dukes, 28, worked as a chalet Dukes adds: “I did it as an experience, host in Tignes for one season, before but I have had employers in the heading to Morzine to be a restaurant ‘real world’ who have been manager at a hotel with more than 200 impressed by my guests a week, working for Crystal. seasons – I guess “I was responsible for a team of 18 NEXT WEEK they show I staff across breakfast, lunch, afternoon had drive and tea and dinner,” she says. “I got on The ’hoods that independence at the slopes up to four times a week. feel like home a young age.”

I did my first season having been able

What is YPlan and how did it start?

YPlan is an app that offers a shortlist of the best events on every night.

You can also book via the app in just two taps. In 2012 Vik – a close friend of mine – and I decided to quit our jobs and began work on our own start-up. After refining a list of 51 possibilities down to one workable idea, we created YPlan.

What do you do day-to-day?

We have a lot of meetings with the likes of Google, Facebook and Apple, which is exciting! Having just launched in New York, the rest of my time is spent flying across America and Europe.

What’s the best part of your job?

Knowing that Londoners and New Yorkers alike need never be caught short when looking for something exciting to do in their city!

And the most challenging?

Managing 500 emails a day! yplanapp.com/download

How to...

keep alert Has your brain switched itself off? Are your eyes heavy? Here’s how to get out of your slump...

• If you’re allowed, turn on the

radio or plug in your iPod. Lively music will help wake you up.

• We know you’re busy, but take a 10-minute break to get some fresh air and sunlight. You’ll feel much better for it and you’ll get more work done in the long run.

• Drink some cold water. When you’re warm your body feels sluggish. Cool yourself down with a refreshing drink.

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23

tntjobs.co.uk GALLOWGLASS www.gallowglass.com

Job of the WeeK: Crew Location: London Salary: Starting at £8.00 per hour + skills payments

Gallowglass is Europe’s leading crewing company to the events industry working for TV, Theatre, Live Events, Sports Events and Outdoor Productions amongst others.

Gallowglass has vacancies for friendly enthusiastic and outgoing people to join our crew.

You will need to be physically fit, have excellent spoken English, be adaptable, happy to work anti-social hours and have a can-do attitude.

AAB JOINERY LIMITED

Job of the WeeK: Joiner/Cabinet Maker Location: Workshop based Croydon Salary: TBC

T: 020 8688 2826 aabjoinery.com

Production and installation of Joinery and Cabinets.

Bespoke joinerys and cabinet makers.

CVs to hr@gallowglass.com or complete our on line form at www.gallowglass.com

Need to be able to operate machinery and work to drawings.

Must have good level of English. Site work will also be a part of the job.

Aaron Mcdowall | 07944 192 625 | aaron.aabjoinery@gmail.com

Helping Hands HomeCare T: 0808 252 4164 www.helpinghandshomecare.co.uk We are a leading provider of care in the UK supporting customers to remain in their own home

Job of the WeeK: Live In Carer Location: Nationwide Salary: Competitive Live In Carers required Nationwide. Directly employed by Helping Hands Homecare. Live and care for your customer in their own home. Fully supported role. Approx 6-8 weeks placement then a break.

Recruitment | 0808 180 1123 | www.hhjobs.co.uk

Origin T: 020 7617 7894 www.origincare.com Live-in roles typically of 2 weeks on and 1 week off. Free specialist training provided with Origin, a dedicated company established over 10 years.

McKanna Meats T: 020 7242 7740

Job of the WeeK: Live-In Carers Location: London & South East Salary: up to £630pw Our clients are young adults with a spinal injury. We need positive people to help them live independently. Free accommodation, food and refunded travel expenses!

Promotional prospects and higher rates of pay available. A Driving licence is essential.

John Hardy | 020 7617 7894 | johnhardy@origincare.com

JOB of OF the THE WeeK: WEEK: Butcher Live-In Carers Job required London London & SouthSalary: East Salary: up to £630pw Location: Central On application

A traditional butchers shop in the heart of London.

Our clients are young reliable, adults with a spinal injury. needspeaking. positive people them Must be experienced, hard working and We English 5 days to perhelp week. live independently.

Free accommodation, food and refunded travel expenses! Promotional Retail Catering Shop. prospects and higher rates of pay available. A Driving licence is essential.

Contact Steve or Ian on 020 7242 7740 John Hardy | 020 7617 7894 | johnhardy@origincare.com

Constantia Care Ltd

Job of the WeeK: Live-in Carers

T: 020 8343 6027 www.constantiacare.co.uk

Location: Nationwide Salary: up to £600 for a 7 day week

Constantia Care, is a private care agency providing live-in carers to clients throughout the uk.

Care24seven

As a care assistant you will be required to assist our clients to live their life in a way they wish; you may be required to help with personal care, light housekeeping & companionship.

Morag Collier | 02083436027 | morag.collier@constantiacare.co.uk

www.care24seven.com

Job of the WeeK: Domiciliary Hourly Care Workers Location: Across London – Head Office Chiswick 020 8912 4642 Salary: Fair rates of pay available

Dynamic Care Company is recruiting experienced and new Domiciliary Hourly Care Workers within London.

You are expected to provide care to the elderly in their own home. We are currently recruiting carers who can be dynamic and have good communication skills.

Work within the guidelines of the company policies & procedures. Training is given.

T: 020 8912 4642

Please forward your CV to max@care24seven.com

Looking for your next job?

New jobs online every day To advertise your job of the week contact 24 tntMagazine.com tntMagazine.com 24 Jaqui Ward | 020 3137 5950 | jaqui.ward@tntmagazine.com

tntjobs.co.uk

Work for some of the most prestigious Catering and Event companies in London!

Clients include; Film Premieres, Promotion Companies, Sporting Events, 5* hotels and City Firms

• • • • •

·Qualified Chefs up to £12 p/hr ·Events Staff and Hosts up to £10 p/hr ·Silver Service and Butlers up to £10 p/hr ·Baristas and Deli Assistants up to £8 p/hr ·Kitchen Porters/General Assistants up to £7 p/hr Rates depend on experience.

Uniform required and proof of right to work

To apply please send your CV to joinus@admiralgroup.com quoting TNT in the subject line New Recruits, Admiral Group, 20 Cousin Lane EC4R 3TE or email joinus@admiralgroup.com

www.admiralgroup.com SOURCE BATTERSEA Farm to table restaurant, opening November 2013.

Serving great food, cooked simply and in season, in London’s coolest neighborhoods.

LEYLAND SDM T: 020 7275 2979 www.leylandsdm.co.uk Leyland SDM is the local DIY store of choice with 17 stores on some of Central London’s most prestigious roads.

THE CROWN INN T: 01386 725351 www.thecrownkemerton.co.uk Family run pub with B&B rooms in a beautiful, friendly and social cotswold village. Part of self catering cottages and wedding venue nearby.

JOB OF THE WEEK: Head Chef Location: Battersea Salary: £30k to £48k pa, depending on experience Head chef required to be part of our opening team. Must have a passion for sourcing the best ingredients, lead a kitchen with determination, and be a team player.

Elsa De Jager | elsa@sourcebattersea.com

JOB OF THE WEEK: Full /part time experienced retail sales assistants.

Location: Central London Salary: Starting rate £7.21 per hour • Maintaining high standards of customer service delivery • EPOS & till operation • Stock handling & merchandising • Maintaining high standards of store presentation and cleanliness • Any other dutiesrequired by management.

Online at www.leylandsdm.co.uk or email cv and covering letter to sandra@leylandsdm.co.uk

JOB OF THE WEEK: Chef/Cook (may suit job share) Location: Kemerton, Gloucs Salary: £7-9 per hour depending on experience Full-time chef/cook to run small pub kitchen serving home-made food. Can range from 4 to 40 covers in a sitting. You must have the necessary skills to prepare and make dishes from scratch and present them to a high standard in a timely manner. This role may suit two people, live in or out.

Diana Herford | 01386 725351 | herfords@uppercourt.co.uk

JOBS

WORLDVIEW

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Spunky: sperm makes women more clever, apparently (except with grammar, as above)

‘Giving bj’s makes women happier’ US

Sperm makes women happier and more intelligent according to an American study.

Scientists at the State University of New York have proved that semen contains a wide range of sleep-improving, mood-rising and affection-increasing chemicals as well as at least three anti-depressants. Women who had unprotected oral sex or intercourse also got higher scores on cognitive tests.

The study of 293 females revealed that sexually active straight women who used condoms got depressed as often as women who had no sex at all. Sexually active condom-less women, on the other hand, showed far less symptoms of depression.

How happy women are catching STDs or getting involuntarily pregnant from unprotected sex wasn’t shown in the study.

Hello down there: a four-day-old Chilean flamingo chick, born September 29, is fed by its father at the Himeji Central Park in Japan

tweets of the week @Queen_UK American Government shut down. Not sure what the fuss is.

Italian Government shut down about 40 years ago and no one’s noticed. @piersmorgan I read, enjoy, and occasionally get enraged by the Daily Mail. There, I’ve said it.

sci-fi glasses to translate menus japan

You need never order the sautéed dog by mistake again as a pair of glasses that will translate menus and signs have been unveiled at a gadget show in Japan.

The glasses, which are still in the prototype stage but should be ready 26

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in time for the 2020 Tokyo Olympics, translate Japanese, English, Chinese and Korean languages.

Showcased by NTT Docomo at CEATEC Japan, the head-mounted display can also turn flat surfaces into touch screens and identify people through face recognition using smartphone databases.

The device isn’t exactly slick at this stage, with the glasses looking like something Robocop’s geeky younger brother might wear, but with seven more years to develop them, we reckon we’ll be donning a pair and impressing our mates with our ‘fluent Japanese’– at least when it comes to menus.

jail time for ‘revenge porn’ US

Break-ups are hard enough, without having your private snaps posted on the internet. But bitter exes in California should think twice before tapping ‘share’, as the state has made ‘revenge porn’ a jailable offence.

Californian Governor Jerry Brown has signed a bill outlawing the posting of identifiable nude pictures of someone else online without permission and with the intent to cause emotional distress or humiliation. The penalty is up to six months in jail and a $1000 fine. Other states have opposed the rule over

free speech rights.

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Beware of bikies: Police presence has been upped in Surfer’s Paradise as the Finks bikie gang grows

THIS WEEK

IN NUMBERS 27,000

The amount of money in pounds a jobless couple has received each year in benefits, as well as a four-bedroom home.

The number of years a dedicated author spent as a swinger in order to publish a book about the sexy sub-culture.

25

NOTORIOUS BIKE GANGS JOIN FORCES

3

The number season The Simpsons is now in.

Word has it, one of the main characters dies!

Who will it be?

AUSTRALIA

Infamous Aussie bikie gang, the Finks, has said it will join forces with notorious US gang, the Mongols, to become a global outlaw force.

Following two recent bikie brawls in the tourist hot spot, Surfer’s Paradise, as well as a siege of Southport police station, the Queensland Police Service has brought nearly 100 more police over from Brisbane to patrol the Glitter Strip.

The move to join the Mongols will mean the bikie gang will become the largest in the country, with some 400 members.

“This is just a fear and intimidation tactic by the Finks,” said Attorney-General Jarrod Bleijie, adding that it would not scare the government from pushing through with its ban on bikie gatherings.

AFFLECK WAS BATTY FOR SUPERHERO ROLE

Photos: Thinkstock, Getty

US

Ben Affleck, who has been cast as Batman in the forthcoming Superman vs Batman movie, built his own Bat cave to the tune of $50,000.

Since Ben Affleck was announced as the new Batman, plenty of disgruntled fans have voiced their disapproval of Warner Bros’ casting. But filmmaker and friend of Affleck, Kevin Smith, has revealed that the actor built himself his own Bat cave in his house years before he was cast in the role.

Bat in the cave: Ben Affleck Speaking with Entertainment Weekly, Smith said that Affleck showed him the bat cave, and then told a stunned Smith how much it cost him to create. “Worth every fucking penny,” said Smith.

At least now we know Affleck’s performance will have been well rehearsed.

EUTHANISED OVER SEX CHANGE BOTCH BELGIUM

A 44-year-old man who was born a woman has been euthanised after a “botched” sex change.

Belgian Nathan Verhelst, who was born Nancy, underwent hormone therapy, followed by a mastectomy and a penis construction in 2012 but “none of these operations worked as desired”. Nathan added: “I do not want to be a monster.”

Wim Distelmans, who implemented the legal euthanasia, said: “Unbearable suffering for euthanasia can be both physical and psychological. This was a case that clearly met the conditions demanded by the law. Nathan underwent counselling for six months.”

The amount of tax money in pounds demanded by HMRC from a man who actually owed nothing.

10,000

QUOTE OF THE WEEK I’ll take her old boyfriend, though.

As the French say, ‘A bit on the side’. He’s gorgeous... those Australians.’

Sir Elton John is happy to console Liam Hemsworth after his break up with exfiancée Miley Cirus

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Stellar year: Cooper Cronk

KANGAROO CRONK WINS DALLY M nrl

A last-minute field goal in the final round of the year clinched the points Cooper Cronk needed to win the supertight Dally M medal count ahead of the weekend’s NRL Grand Final.

The Melbourne Storm halfback is expected to be named in a final Australian World Cup squad today (Monday, October 7) to top off a stellar individual year, even if his side fell short in the finals.

Cameron Smith, hooker of the year, is expected to be named captain alongside fullback of the year Billy Slater in the Kangaroos line-up. See tntmagazine.com for a full breakdown of the Australian World Cup squad.

mum burgess upset for outcast luke rugby league

No mum wants to see their boy left out of the game, but the situation is extreme for Julie Burgess, mother of Sam, Tom and George, all named in the England World Cup line-up, which left oldest brother Luke out of coach Steve McNamara’s 24-man fray.

“As a mum you think you think you would be really excited that three of your sons have been selected,” she told BBC Radio 5 Live.

“I’m really delighted for Thomas and George. It’s their debut for full internationals and it’s so exciting and a great achievement and it’s amazing Sam’s coming back but it’s just so disappointing Luke’s not in there.

“That’s the heartbreak. It’s a huge disappointment for him to not be a part of that.”

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Fast bowler Brett Lee marked 500 days until the 2015 ICC Cricket World Cup in Australia and New Zealand in Sydney Harbour with the trophy they will be playing for.

It’ll be the 11th installment of the Cup, with India keen to retain their trophy and Australia, the most winning nation in the tournament history, keen to win on home turf.

osiek: les bleus the test his ‘roos need football

Australia’s Socceroos join from all corners of the football globe to take on France at Parc de Princes in Paris on Friday as their preparation for the 2014 World Cup in Brazil continues.

Coach Holgier Osieck has again given young blood a chance in his squad but also welcomes the return of Tim Cahill and Luke Wilshere from the side which was given a 6-0 lesson by the Cup hosts last month. Keeper Mark Schwartzer is a notable omission from the squad set to also play Canada on October 17 in London.

“It’s another big one,” Osieck said of the France match-up.

BIG WEEK FOR ...

Young gun Nic Maddinson is odds on to open the batting with Aaron Finch for Australia in Thursday’s Twenty20 match in India. His possible first man up reward would come in return for the excellent form he’s showed of late for Australia A. Maddison, who is only 21 years-old, was a key member of the Sydney Sixers side that went out and won the 2012 T20 Champions League

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QUOTES OF THE WEEK “We’re not queer, I really don’t like him.

It’s just we were forced together, tripped in the mud and we’re here” Norm Proven, joking of course (except for the first bit), who’s immortalised with his mate Arthur Summons in the NRL Premiership trophy.

To the top: a big series win and Australia are back to the top of the world rankings.

PREVIEW DOWN AUSSIES COULD GO NO.1 IN INDIA AUSTRALIA V INDIA, THUR, 10AM, SKY SPORTS 3

Captain Michael Clarke is undergoing much-needed recuperation and coach Darren Lehmann is having a break too but, honestly, this is an important tour.

Basically seven one-day internationals between India and Australia, who are hugely bankable in the political powerhouse of cricket, and a Twenty20 match preceding it is a way for someone to fill their pockets.

But a big series win from the Aussies, who just won an ODI series in England, and they’re back to the top of the world rankings. Sure, The Ashes is the all-important series to win back, but even the doom and gloom-mongers Down Under could get a little spark from a win on the sub-continent.

George Bailey will skipper the side as Callum Ferguson, who’s been in prodigious form in domestic limited overs competitions and is no stranger to international cricket, will steps into the upper middle order for Clarke.

THE CHAT | WOEFUL WALLABIES

“I realise I need to earn back a lot of respect, and that is exactly what I plan to do both on and off the field” Wallaby James O’Connor after getting a mutual release from his ARU contract after dramas on and off the field. The door has remained open for him to return in 2014.

“I said, ‘No chance’.”

Sir Alex Ferguson reveals in an hour-long interview with US TV network PBS that he was not tempted even one little bit by an approach by Roman Abramovich in 2003 to manage Chelsea.

TV HIGHLIGHTS

Photos: Getty

CRICKET So Ewen McKenzie was supposed to be the Q Wallabies’ saviour – Robbie Deans looks pretty good now though doesn’t he?

It’s not a good look for former Reds mastermind and A Wallabies prop McKenzie, whose only international wins since taking over Australian duties have been against Rugby Championship minnows Argentina. As it stood, South Africa played New Zealand at the weekend with a slim chance of snatching the title from the routinely excelled All Blacks.

Aussie rugby fans can cope with a hard-fought defeat to the All Blacks but to be down 20-3 after less than 20 minutes to the Proteas, and to have no answer after that, is a real worry.

McKenzie conceded his men were “way off the mark”.

India v Australia A Twenty20 before the seven one-dayers Thur, 2pm, Sky Sports 1

FORMULA 1 Japan Grand Prix Live action from the Suzuka circuit Sun, race from 7am, Sky Sports F1 & BBC One

FOOTBALL Saviour: Ewen McKenzie

England v Montenegro Fri, 7pm, ITV

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Eyes on the prize Controversy aside, the Heineken Cup is one of the great tournaments in world rugby WORDS MICHAEL GADD

Toulon mount their title defence when the first round of the Heineken Cup kicks off this weekend. Regardless of what happens next year, as England and France’s breakaway tournament looks ever more possible, there’s still at least one more year of this cracking tournament combining the best of Europe’s club sides and the diversity in style and personnel that comes with it. To mark the occasion, TNT looks at how the six pools shape up and see who has done best in the transfer market during the off-season.

POOL 1 Opening round: Castres Olympique (France) v Northampton Saints (England); Leinster (Ireland) v Ospreys (Wales) This pool will offer some epic clashes before the finals. Saints were 2000 champions and 2011 runners-up, and ambushed Saracens to go through to last year’s Premiership final and win. They’ve also landed George North (Scarlets) and Alex Corbisiero (London Irish), who starred for the British and Irish Lions in Australia, and Samoan scrum-half, Kahn Fotuali’i, who faces his former Ospreys teammates. Their main competition comes from Leinster, who last year added the second tier Amlin Challenge Cup to their three Heineken Cup titles. They’ve landed Springbok full-back Zane Kirchner (Blue Bulls) and Ireland second row Mike McCarthy (Connacht) but have lost key playmaker Jonny Sexton. The Ospreys could struggle, but have brought in Italy scrum half Tito Tebaldi from Zebre while Top 14 champions Castres Olympique have added to their squad with Scottish international Richie Gray, who they’ve snagged from Sale Sharks, but are rank outsiders in this pool.

POOL 2 Opening round: Exeter (England) v Cardiff Blues (Wales); Toulon (France) v Glasgow Warriors (Scotland) A rough opening test for Glasgow when they meet Toulon, last year’s champions and the favourites to take out 30

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the 2013-14 Cup. They have however brought Scotland international Richie Vernon (Sale) back home and landed Argentina national Gabriel Ascarate, along with some young Scottish talent in the forwards. But with stars such as Jonny Wilkinson, who kicked his side to a 16-15 victory in last year’s final, and former Wallaby star Matt Giteau pulling the strings, Toulon will have to stuff up big time to not walk through this pool. They’ve also added South African World Cup-winner Bryan Habana, former All Black Ali Williams and former Wallaby Drew Mitchell. Cardiff Blues welcome back Gethin Jenkins from Toulon and beefed up the front row with Matthew Rees (Scarlets). Exeter Chiefs, captained

by Aussie Dean Mumm, have also been active in the market with back rower Don Armand (Stormers) and Tom James and Ceri Sweeney (both Cardiff).

POOL 3 Opening round: Connacht (Ireland) v Saracens (England); Toulouse (France) v Zebre (Italy) With 2000’s Heineken Cup-winning captain Pat Lam at the helm could this be the year Connacht shock everyone?

Ambitious in a pool with last year’s semi-finalists Saracens, who have started the Premiership season in style and the big coin of Toulouse. Sarries have new fire power up front through prop James Johnston (Harlequins) and dynamite No 8 Billy Vunipola (London Wasps) to paper over the loss of veteran John Smit (retired). Connacht have been busy in the break landing Waikato Chiefs Super Rugby-winning captain Craig Clarke and All Muldowney (Exeter) after the loss of Irish international second rower Mike McCarthy, who’s gone to Leinster. Toulouse’s pockets are always open to the right players, and they’ve decided Hosea Gear (Highlanders), Joe Tekori (Castres), Chiliboy Ralepelle and Jano Vermaak (both Blue Bulls) can help their next campaign. Zebre have added valuable experience in All Black and Waikato Chiefs scrumhalf Brendon Leonard.

Billy Vunipola has added extra firepower to Saracens’ pack

Veteran flyhalf Nick Evans’ cool head will be vital for Harlequins POOL 4 Opening round: Harlequins (England) v Scarlets (Wales); Racing Metro 92 (France) v Clermont Auvergne (France) This is a dangerous pool for last year’s losing finalists Clermont who face a cashed-up Racing Metro and the everstrong Harlequins. Their narrow one-point loss in the final last year when they were favourites to beat Toulon and after leading will have hurt, and while they’ve been good at home in domestic rugby they were flogged 43-3 by Montpellier, who they beat in last year’s Cup quarter final.

Scarlets smashed Northampton in the opening round last year so should never be discounted, but this is another humdinger of a pool. The loss of George North hurts, so Lions centre Jonathan Davies and all the other lesser knowns will have to play out of their skin. Quins have a steady line-up but are actually outsiders to progress from the pool stages due to Racing’s big transfer traffic buying - 19 players have been released, sold or loaned and 16 have come in, most significantly Lions due Jonny Sexton from Leinster and Jamie Roberts from Cardiff, but such massive changes mean a settling in period. Fascinating pool.

Photos: Getty

POOL 5 Opening round: Ulster (Ireland) v Leicester (England); Benetton Treviso (Italy) v Montpellier (France) The top two sides in this pool meet straight up in Belfast, so will known how things shape up from the off. Leicester Tigers have lost some valuable talent to rivals - Martin Castrogiovanni (Toulon) and George Ford (Bath) - and retirement Geordan Murphy, but have added well. Ryan Lamb (Northampton Saints), Gonzalo Camacho (Exeter Chiefs) and David Mélé and Jerome Schuster (Perpignan) have come in.

Ulster are one of the more stable line-up sin the Cup led by former Springbok Johann Muller, with only minor losses and gains to last year’s side that made the quarters

Former Wallaby Dean Mumm plays his first Heineken Cup as Exeter captain and were runners up the year before. News that New Zealand no.8 Nick Williams is staying until 2016 is huge for them. Montpellier will surely challenge once again for the tournament knockout stage with the likes of Jim Hamilton (Gloucester Rugby), Rene Ranger (Auckland Blues), Wynand Olivier (Blue Bulls) and Nicolas Mas (Perpignan) joining them.

Benetton have made no inroads in the market and would shock everyone if they progressed.

POOL 6 Opening round: Edinburgh (Scotland) v Munster (Ireland); Gloucester (England) v Perpignon (France) Munster have been given the closest thing to a free hit in the pool stages, but that miht make this dangerous. Probably not though. They’re no stranger to success in this tournament, winning twice in three years in the middle of the noughties.

Cardiff’s Millennium Stadium, where this year’s final will be played, was incidentally the venue for both those previous triumphs against Biarritz Olympique and Toulouse.

With Lion Conor Murray, one of the best halfbacks in the world, back in action for them they’ll be ones to watch, although bookies give their Dublin rivals Leinster much better hope. Edinburgh has raided Super Rugby’s ranks - Ollie Atkins and Grayson Hart (Waratahs) and James Hilterbrand (Western Force) – to make some significant additions alongside some academy graduates who will get a start and snagged Jack Cuthbert (Bath). Catalan side Perpignon make the step up after two years in the Amlin Challenge Cup. They scraped in because France got an extra slot after Toulon won last year’s title. Likewise Gloucester, who focused their energy last Premiership season to get back into the top flight. They’re two win/two loss start to the season in England doesn’t bode well though.

All Heineken Cup games will be broadcast live on Sky Sports.

Check guides for times skysports.com

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Scanbalt Experience

The expert on budget travel in Scandinavia, The Baltics and Russia

WintEr experiences 2013-14 Lapland Christmas Tour 6 days €440

Stockholm - Kiruna - Abisko - Stockholm Have a white Christmas, do amazing activities and look for the Northern Lights.

Lapland New Year’s Tour 9 days €680

Stockholm-Kiruna-Inari-Rovaniemi-Helsinki Celebrate New Year’s North of the Arctic Circle. The fireworks might be replaced with some Northern Lights! This is a trip of a lifetime with experiences like The Ice Hotel, dogsledding, visit to Santa, sauna with arctic swim and much more!

Magic Lapland Adventure 7 days €425

Stockholm-Kiruna-Abisko-Jokkmokk-Stockholm.

Depart: Dec 17, Jan 5, Feb 23, Mar 20 and a special tour for the unique Sami event Jokkmokk Market in Feb. Explore Swedish Lapland, check the Ice Hotel, visit the Sami, look for Northern Lights and go dogsledding in stunning nature.

Russian New Year’s Tour 7 days €580

Helsinki-Moscow-St Petersburg-Tallinn Experience four great cities including Moscow on New Year’s!

Baltic New Year’s Tour 6 days €310

Helsinki-Tallinn-Riga Celebrate New Year’s in Riga and before that check out funky Helsinki, stay in medieval Tallinn and a night on the Estonian Countryside!

Baltic Easter Bunny Tour, 8 days €380 Riga - Tallinn - St.Petersburg - Helsinki - Stockholm A grand roundtrip through unique capitals of the Baltic Sea

Possible combinations: Combine The Lapland Christmas Tour with New Years to Russia or The Baltic States to get the maximum holiday.

th and Book online before Oct 15nt 15% get a special TNT discou of Campaign code: TNT

www.scanbaltexperience.com info@scanbaltexperience.com

TRAVEL LATE DEALS | HOTSHOTS | TRAVEL TIPS | TOP FIVE | TOURS | BIG TRIP IMAGE OF THE WEEK

STREET SMARTS A new Banksy work on the side of a wall in New York City where the anonymous artist has announced a month-long residency

Photos: Getty

INSIDE

ISLAND WITH SPIRIT /36

SECRET ITALY /42

RIDE OF YOUR LIFE /46

TNT embarks on a secret whisky trail in search of a wee dram, discovering Scotland’s stunning scenery – and submarine theft

Don’t stick to the usual tourist traps when it comes to exploring the boot – TNT ventures further afield for more scenic wonders

We rev our engine for a once-in-a-lifetime trip, motorbiking across Bolivia’s famous salt deserts. Just watch out for manholes TNTMAGAZINE.COM

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TRAVELDIARY

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Zombies will be revived for the night at the Village Halloween Parade

Helen Elfer

EVER BEEN CONNED BLIND?

VILLAGE HALLOWEEN PARADE New York, US This Halloween, join some 60,000 costumed revellers at this flamboyant fright fest in Greenwich Village. There will be giant 31 puppets, live music, dancing and creative outfits galore. Anyone not wearing a costume won’t be allowed in, and judging by the way Americans do things (read: OTT), wearing a bed sheet and claiming to be a ghost won’t cut it.

OCT

WHY: The Village Halloween Parade has been going strong since it was founded back in 1974. Since then, the event has transformed into a carnival, rather than the theatrical event it started life as. More than 60,000 costumed participants and two million spectators will line the mile-long parade this year.

AIRWAVES FESTIVAL Reykjavik, Iceland

Headliners at this annual five-day music festival will 30 include local Icelandic bands, as well as international music icons who are like Mecca for hipsters. For a great deal, visit the website for packages that include tickets, flights from London and accommodation.

OCT

icelandairwaves.is

OCTOBER SALON Belgrade, Serbia

Belgrade’s contemporary arts festival is exhibiting 11 edgy artwork from both Serbian and international up-andcoming artists for its 54th year.

Open until November 17. Plus this city has some of the coolest bars in Europe.

OCT

oktobarskisalon.org

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DO IT BECAUSE: Last year’s festival was cancelled due to Hurricane Sandy, and so this year’s theme is ‘Revival’ (zombies at the ready!). They will also be honouring the real-life superheroes who stepped up to help those in need during the natural disaster. halloween-nyc.com

BELFAST FESTIVAL

Belfast, Northern Ireland

Hop over the water to get your culture fix at The 17 Belfast Festival at Queen’s, which is a solid two weeks of theatre, dance, literature, music and film. With talks such as ‘The Simpsons and their Mathematical Secrets’, we are very much intrigued...

OCT

belfastfestival.com

ORIENTAL DANCE FEST

Cape Town, South Africa

There’s everything from traditional belly dancing 24 to performances of modern styles and workshops at the 8th International Oriental Dance Festival, which is held in aid of abused women and children, until October 27.

OCT

iodfcapetown.com

Photo: Getty

I have. Boy, have I been scammed over the years. The first time was in Bangkok and I was only 18. A tuk-tuk driver drove my friend and I down an alley, stopped and pointed to a dent in his bumper. “You kicked this and it broke,” he lied, calmly. “Now you give me $100.” We decided the best course of action was to leg it. I looked over my shoulder as we ran away, backpacks bouncing wildly on our backs, to see him chuckling away to an evil buddy.

Another time, in Shanghai, a ragged-looking shoe shiner threw a glob of what looked like bird shit on my boot, then grabbed my leg and started wiping it off, demanding huge amounts of money for the service. I tried to shake him off to no avail, and then finally yelled at him to go away (using a ruder, alternative expression), but it didn’t look good to passers-by. “l think that girl just kicked that poor beggar,” I heard a lady say to her husband on her way by. “Disgraceful.”

What else? Overpaying taxi drivers (it’s always from the airport that they invent bogus tolls and extra fees, isn’t it?), buying ‘jade’ necklaces that left green smudges all over my neck, spending a tenner on a bottle of water because I got confused with the currency.

You name it, it’s happened.

On reflection I can laugh about it, and at least I know I’m not the only gullible gallivanter in the world.

Many of the people I have met on my travels share similar tales and I find it reassuring that even the most experienced travellers still get ripped off. The secret to beating the conartists it seems, at least on a personal level, is to learn how to shake it off and not let it spoil the rest of your holiday.

Not sure I’m quite there yet. How about you?

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kenya is ‘as normal’ Travellers to Kenya have been told conditions are “as normal” following the horrific terrorist attack on a central shopping centre. The fourday siege, claimed by al Shabaab, has resulted in the death of at least 67 citizens and tourists, with 39 people still reported missing. Kenyan cabinet secretary for tourism Phyllis Kandie announced: “The attack was a despicable act of cowardice intended to instill fear among Kenyans and our visitors, but the attackers must never be allowed to have their way. We are hereby therefore affirming that normal activities are going on in all parts of the country.”

Photos: Getty

’Dam that’s good!

Eurostar has announced a new direct route between England and Amsterdam. This will come as particularly good news to anyone who has tried to change trains in Brussels in a post’Dam haze. Things can get confusing. Due to launch at the end of 2016, as well as eliminating the possibility of getting stranded in Brussels, it will cut the journey time down by nearly an hour, taking four rather than nearly five hours to get to the land of clogs, cheese and live sex shows.

It was reported that the price of a ticket would likely remain around the same – £99 return.

trouble in paradise The Maldives, known for its five-star service, luxury resorts and holidays of a lifetime, is in peril as protests break out over the cancellation of the presidential election. The Foreign Office has warned visitors to the capital, Malé, to “take care, seek up-to-date information and stay away from demonstrations”. In addition, tourists whisked away from the capital to their island resort may find their dream holiday is more of a nightmare as resort staff are threatening to go on strike. Holidaymakers are advised to get in touch with their hotel before they travel.

Po(und)land If you’ve been contemplating a trip to Poland, now’s the time to do it as hotel prices in Warsaw have reportedly dropped by 26 per cent. An average night for a hotel in Warsaw now costs $102 (£63), according to hotels.com. Breaking away from its troubled past, Warsaw is an awesome place to visit, with Savior Square now boasting chic cafes, stylish restaurants and fun nightlife. It also has several milk bars remaining from their communist era, which are cafeteriastyle eateries that offer cheap but wholesome food, as well as a glimpse of the past.

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Beautiful: remote Islay

EAT, DRINK, SLEEP

Islay

scotland

SCOTLAND EDINBURGH

Islay

Glasgow

N. IRELAND

GETTING THERE Indirect return flights from Heathrow with British Airways from £227 (britishairways.com).

One-way train tickets from London to Glasgow Airport start from £42 (virgintrains.co.uk). Flights from Glasgow to Islay start from £30 one way with Flybe (flybe.com).

The island’s most charming hotel, Port Charlotte, has a romantic restaurant. Snag a window table if you can. The Loch Indaal scallops flavoured with Islay whisky are gorgeous. (portcharlottehotel.co.uk) The best place to eat at any of the distilleries, Ardbeg Distillery is worth going to just for the food. Good value mains include local meat and seafood. (ardbeg.com) Bowmore’s Lochside Hotel has one of the best-stocked whisky bars on the island, boasting a comprehensive collection of rare Islay tipples. (lochsidehotel.co.uk) At the Port Askaig Hotel, you can recline with views across the Sound of Islay to the epic mountains of Jura. Sells a selection of blended whisky at £1 per dram. (portaskaig.co.uk) Port Charlotte Hotel is a charming old whitewashed waterfront dame in the pretty eponymous village. Make sure to book a room facing the sea.

Double rooms start at £190 and include a full Scottish breakfast. (portcharlottehotel.co.uk)

Hot air: bagpipers will likely be included 36

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The island’s official Youth Hostel is housed in an old whisky warehouse by the sea in Port Charlotte. Rooms start at £16.25 pppn. (syha.org.uk)

UKTRIP

An island with spirit TNT embarks on a secret whisky trail in search of a wee dram, discovering Scotland’s stunning scenery – and submarine theft

Photos: Robin McKelvie, Getty, Thinkstock, islaygallery.com

WORDS ROBIN MCKELVIE

As I fly in, it’s easy to see why the legendary Lords of the Isles chose Islay as their home. The island is painted in vivid and dramatic colours – a collage of rolling hills, sweeping sand-strewn bays and craggy coastline, with the shadowy ‘Paps of Jura’, the lofty mountain range that dominates the neighbouring island of Jura, rising to the east. Add to this eight distilleries tucked into one wildly beautiful island, and Islay should be flooded with tourists – just as deluges of dram-sluggers crowd Scotland’s biggest whisky region of Speyside on the mainland. But such is the remoteness of this Hebridean isle, the tourist hordes have yet to really discover it. This leaves the locals to get on with life much as they did centuries ago, when the lords ruled swathes of Scotland from their Islay stronghold.

The island’s natural beauty is echoed in Islay’s whisky distilleries, which all produce single malts with an intoxicating aroma of peat. Combining with the fresh island water and traces of seaweed, it is a taste that draws in everyone from connoisseurs through to timid after-dinner drinkers (the type who normally profess to not liking the drink that is eulogised in Gaelic as ‘Uisge Beatha’, or the ‘Water of Life’). Today’s eight distilleries – Ardbeg, Bowmore, Bruichladdich, Bunnahabhainn, Caol Ila, Kilchoman, Lagavulin and Laphroaig – produce world-renowned whisky.

The best way to learn more about the hallowed dram is on a guided tour. Of the five I try out, easily the best is at Ardbeg, an ambitious distillery that only re-opened in 1997 after being mothballed in 1981. Ardbeg shares Islay’s most spectacular stretch of coastline with its equally picturesque neighbours Lagavulin and Laphroaig.

The team here has created a great tour around the full workings of the distillery. It culminates in a café that even manages to draw in non-whisky-drinking locals with a range of great meals and comforting traditional desserts such as clootie dumpling (not an unfortunate disease, but a Scottish suet pudding made with breadcrumbs and sultanas).

After asking directions from their stillman, I hike from the distillery up the rough hillside to Loch Uigeadail, where Ardbeg’s peaty water is sourced. The tradition is to ‘return’ a dram or two to the loch, but there was no way I was going to waste what is now my favourite island malt!

Bruichladdich has also recently been reborn with a real

attempt to employ a range of traditional methods. On its tour, I learn about the Victorian-era distilling equipment that attracted some unexpected attention from the US Defence Threat Reduction Agency (DTRA).

I’m told when Bruichladdich’s owners first received an email from DTRA, they thought it was a joke. But it turned out the distillery’s webcams, which record the antique distilling process, had become the focus of an intelligence operation that mistook the equipment for a potential terrorist threat. In 2005, the distillery again made the headlines when it was involved in the ‘capture’ of a British

“

Islay should be flooded with tourists

”

spy mini-submarine. After discovering the vessel, laden with high-tech surveillance equipment, the distillery reported it to the Ministry of Defence (MoD).

A series of strange exchanges reportedly followed, during which the MoD first denied it was theirs – despite there being MoD identification on it – and then seemed to imply that the distillery had stolen it from them.

(The distillery launched a ‘Yellow Submarine’ malt to commemorate the occasion.) Bruichladdich’s tendency towards the dramatic ensures its tours are packed with entertaining tall stories.

I end my personal whisky trail at the smallest and newest distillery on Islay, Kilchoman – the first to be built on the island in 124 years and only opened in 2005. In its first year, this small-scale farm operation only yielded seven casks, though production is now stepping up a gear.

Kilchoman links the present to the island’s past, with its storyboards depicting the days when countless NEXT WEEK little stills bustled away in every ‘We do believe in village. A perfect end to my tour fairies’ in Ireland around the most captivating corner of Scotland’s whisky trail.

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TRAVELTIPS

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Sky high: hiking through the Drakensberg Mountains

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READERS’ TIPS WORK HARD, PLAY HARD TIP A lot of travel companies lookOF forTHE crew to assist with various events.

I WEEK just volunteered at Oktoberfest with PP Travel (pptravel.com). They offered accommodation and breakfast and I got to take part in one of the world’s best parties for a fraction of what it would normally have cost.

Llewellyn Cass, via Facebook

YOU ASKED FOR IT...

BARGAIN GIRLY GETAWAY My girlfriends and I went on an amazing trip to Bottle Beach on Koh Phangan in Thailand a few years ago.

We stayed for a week, ate amazing seafood and drank cocktails every night – but we ended up spending less than £100 each! Everyone was really relaxed and friendly there and it’s still one of the most memorable holidays I’ve ever had. I’d go back in a second.

Kirsty Cannon, via email

LAURA LINDSAY FROM LONELY PLANET

season is best to visit the Q Which Drakensberg Mountains in South Africa and where do you suggest to use as a base for a hiking holiday? We are possibly also visiting Lesotho – is this part of the world considered safe given the press usually received? Maria Drakensberg Mountain range is A The one of Southern Africa’s most dramatic

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The top Tip of the Week published will wins a fiver.

Tweet your tip to @tntmagazine.com Email traveltips@tntmagazine.com

A LONELY PLANET GUIDE

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landscapes. In fact, the 243,000 hectares of jagged peaks on the border between South Africa and Lesotho have been granted World Heritage status for their beauty. The best time for a hiking holiday is between April and May when the weather is most stable. Spring (September to October) and summer months (November to March) see high rainfall and in winter (May to August) there can be heavy frosts making conditions treacherous. Every month of the year will see snow on the summits of the mountains, so whenever you visit you should always wear all-weather gear and expect some icy conditions.

The mountains offer a range of different hikes, from beginner day walks to multi-day treks, but the peaks should only be attempted by experienced hikers. All treks need a permit and you must ensure you have an accurate map and up-to-date report on the conditions of

your chosen trail. I’d advise that you choose to explore just one section of the mountain range, either northern, central or southern, as the area is so vast and poorly connected that visiting more than one area can be incredibly time consuming. Also, the three sections of the range operate as separate reserves with individual fees and area maps so it makes sense to select one area to explore. All three parts of the range are equally stunning, so you won’t be missing out if you just limit yourself to one area.

Public transport in the area is poor. If you have a car you will have a greater choice of where to base yourself but if not, stay in accommodation that provides transport. There are plenty of accommodation options ranging from budget to luxury. For example, in the Northern Berg just north of Bergville, there are campsites in the park and, outside the park, backpackers’ hostels, thatched chalets and fancy mountain lodges. Alternatively, Southern Berg is best accessed from the towns of Himeville and Underberg.

It is possible to visit the mountain kingdom of Lesotho (as it is officially known), which is a reasonably safe destination to travel to – just be wary of pickpockets and avoid walking around at night. Mugging is not uncommon but if you exert caution, most visits to Lesotho are trouble free.

CHRISTMAS SHOPPING If you can’t decide what Christmas market to head for this year, I recommend Cologne’s. The markets are really amazing. There are a few of them scattered around the city and one is even on a boat! (cologne.de) Jazz Say, via Facebook

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HOT TIPS: Freedom Freedom can be found anywhere, whether it be a moment of solitude a quiet forest with barely another person around for miles, or an ability to escape the confines of your bustling city surroundings on a bike, the infinite possibilities this mode of transport offers conjuring dreams of a new world, a new horizon, a new experience.

Stevenson’s glistening image of the Sahara is our winner this week though, as he has captured both, travelling by camel through a region that would be most inhospitable otherwise but the expanse of the desert, too, with rolling dunes dwarfing his fellow camel-riders, illustrating their size compared to the natural world.

WINNER SAHARA DESERT Andre Stevenson, New Zealand

WHY IT WORKS I took the camel photo in the Sahara desert in Morocco, a place called Merzouga close to the border with Algeria. It was with a local tour company which takes people out for a night in the desert over the Atlas mountains from Marrakech. I was on a camel myself but it had stopped which allowed me time to take a photo. I like this one given the perspective of the camels compared to the dune on the left (which was pretty big).

RUNNER-UP SPIRIT OF FREEDOM Sarah Banham, New Zealand

RUNNER-UP

WHY IT WORKS This image captures the spirit of freedom in East Berlin. The vintage motorbike reminds us of the communist era whereas the contrasting modern artwork represents today’s freedom of individuality. Both of these elements – the motorbike and artwork – are methods of escape.

A THREE-DAY TOUR OF SCOTLAND AND A PHOTOGRAPHY COURSE Upload your images to tntmagazine.com/hotshots First prize is a three-day tour of Scotland for two worth £218 from Haggis Adventures (haggisadventures.com).

Must be taken within three months of receiving prize letter. The runner-up wins a £60 photography course voucher from Nigel Wilson Photography (photographycourses.org.uk).

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TOP FIVE

1

Markets

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Grand Bazaar, Turkey

Where better to immerse yourself in local culture than a frenetic market?

Bartering for bargains, haggling over homeware and letting the sights, sounds and smells batter your senses is the perfect way to escape the tourist traps in popular holiday destinations.

Whether it’s at a Middle Eastern souk, a European bazaar or an Asian wet market, there are usually as many locals picking up groceries as there are holidaymakers photographing every quirky stall.

Istanbul’s Grand Bazaar is our pick of the world’s best. The covered market, which is more than 500 years old, is a labyrinth of narrow alleys lined with silver jewellery stores, sacks of pungent spices, bright lanterns, embroidered carpets and fabulously carved antique furniture. There are more than 5000 shops along the 60 streets inside the huge two-domed building, the first of which dates back to 1455.

This is a market unlike any other, housing two mosques, two hamams and four fountains for visitors to gaze 00 40

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at while snapping up cheap goods.

And, so long as you’re prepared to bust out your best haggling skills, you can bag an excellent deal.

The best buys to be made are leather goods – you can pick up bargain belts, wallets and bags for much less than you’d pay at home. Take your time agreeing on prices, though – many of the sellers are mathematical wizards, switching between any number of currencies and calculating percentaged discounts quicker than you can work out the exchange rate.

Feeling flush? The more pricey items – furniture, copperware, prayer beads and jewellery – are sold in the domed hall of Cevahir Bedesten.

After all that shopping, treat yourself to a strong Turkish coffee in one of the many cosy cafes inside the Grand Bazaar, which are interspersed between the shops. Then sit back, examine your purchases and spend the next hour people-watching for an unforgettable cultural experience. grandbazaaristanbul.org

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BERBER Souk, Morocco

If you look like a tourist as you’re wandering around this Marrakech souk, shouts of “Primark prices!” will follow you wherever you go.

Indeed the reality is many traditional Moroccan products here really are that – hand-painted ceramics and beautiful leather lampshades can be bought for next to nothing.

Practically everyone you meet will try to sell you a rug you don’t want, but that’s all part of the fun. visitmorocco.com

Photos: Ana Stoppa, Slybacon, Getty,

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fetish market, Togo

The name of this market in Lomé is a little misleading (unless you have very niche bedroom tastes). Instead of latex and leather, you’ll find lots of animal skulls, bones and sacrificial dolls, all of which are used for voodoo spells and medicines.

There is something for the bedroom, though, as among the collections are hundreds of chimpanzee body parts, which are ground into a medicinal powder that’s supposed to help a man’s, ahem, performance. africa.com/togo/travel

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Tsukiji Fish Market, Japan

It’s the biggest wholesale fish market in the world and has an overwhelming smell to match. Tokyo’s Tsukiji seems as though it has half the content of the ocean laid out on ice.

There are amazing products on sale here, from wildly expensive pots of caviar to monstrous 300kg tuna. It’s auction-only inside the inner market, reserved for authorised buyers, while the public can pick up seafood at smaller shops in the outer market. tsukiji-market.or.jp

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Fabric Market, ShangHAI

Fancy a tailored suit for about £60?

How about a dress of Chinese silk, made to measure for £30?

Shanghai’s biggest fabric market is pure chaos, with piles of rolledup materials, random assortments of clothes and people arguing at top volume about prices over the constant whir of old-fashioned sewing machines. But bring a Chinesespeaking guide and everything will fall into place. Shopping Tours Shanghai run visits from £40.

St christopher’s inns superhostel overview At just 100 metres from Gare du Nord, there’s no quibbling over this new hostel’s spot-on location.

Having just opened a few months ago (TNT was invited to the Moulin Rouge-inspired opening night party), it’s already booking up fast.

Think free wifi throughout, 600 rooms, including private en-suites, speedy check-out, a fantastic communal area, and a decently priced Belushi’s bar on the ground floor, where you can buy a pint and watch live music as well as wander down in the morning for a free brekkie.

What more could you want? wow factor It’s brand-spanking new, so everything is shiny and clean at this super-hostel. rooms Our private room with an en-suite shower is spot-on.

It’s compact, but the design is funky, with a arty mural of Salvador Dali on one of the walls. Ask for a room with a view and you’ll get a look-out over the Eiffel Tower.

BILL PLease Rooms from £22pn.

5 rue de Dunkerque, 75010, Paris st-christophers.co.uk

shoppingtoursshanghai.com

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Superba: ancient Genoa

Secret Italy EUROPE

Trieste

Genoa

ITALY ROME

Cagliari

(Clockwise) Cagliari’s beach; city hall in Trieste; nighttime in piazza Unità d’Italia, Trieste 42

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GETTING THERE Ryanair flies direct to Rome Ciampino from London from £29 one way and Rome Ciampino to Cagliari from £28. ryanair.com Trains run from Rome to Trieste and Genoa (from about £80 and £30 one-way). italiarail.com

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Secret Italy Don’t stick to the usual tourist traps when it comes to exploring the boot – TNT ventures further afield for more scenic wonders Words Roberto priolo

Ask any of your mates who’ve travelled to Italy which cities they’ve visited, and I bet they all give you similar answers: Rome, Florence, Venice. It’s a shame, because my home country has so much more to offer once you get off the well-trodden path. With that in mind, here’s my guide to three must-sees among Italy’s less-visited cities.

Genoa: la Superba As the sixth largest city in Italy, Genoa can often be overlooked by tourists with only a weekend to spare.

But, nicknamed la Superba (‘the Superb one’) thanks to its stunning landmarks, the city is well worth a visit. My friend Sara and I wander the maze of narrow alleyways, called vicoli, that make up the medieval heart of Genoa – the birthplace of Christopher Columbus. Young people on bikes and scooters dart by, old women carrying bags full of groceries bargain with fishmongers and chatty students walk towards the university – the place really is the quintessential port city, bustling with life.

The thriftiness of the people here is often more of a façade than genuine meanness, but when it comes to money, no one can take on the Genoese – banking has a long tradition here. The city’s Bank of Saint George was founded in 1407, making it one of the oldest in the world.

We take the Art Nouveau-style lift from Piazza del Portello to the Castelletto, a big esplanade that overlooks the centre.

From here Genoa looks like a tangle of stone and concrete, with the bell tower of the Cathedral of San Lorenzo rising above the rest, and the city’s most iconic landmark, the Lighthouse Of Genoa (or La Lanterna) looming in the distance.

On Friday evening, the alleys quickly fill up with people in the thousands getting ready for a long evening of al fresco drinking and dining. Sara takes me into busy Piazza delle Erbe for a drink. I quickly reach for my wallet and buy Sara a beer. She may not be one of the parsimonious Genoese, but I’d rather not push my luck.

DON’T MISS: The famous architect Renzo Piano redeveloped the whole port in 2001, with The Bigo, Genoa’s beloved panoramic lift, as its centrepiece. This was originally a crane mounted on cargo ships, and now the 40m-high lift features a rotating see-through cabin, enabling visitors to get the best views over the harbour. turismo.comune.genova.it

Cagliari: the Sardinian capital To get a real feel for what laid-back Cagliari (‘Castle’ in Italian) has to offer, I make the journey up the grand stairs of the 400-year-old Bastion of Saint Remy to reach Terrazza Umberto I, a terrace known for having simply glorious views.

It’s worth taking your time here to study the scenery of this ancient city, which includes the pretty harbour, ponds where bright-pink flamingos feed and the mountain which is known as Devil’s Saddle, due to its shape.

The temperature reaches a scorching 35°C outside, so I seek out some shade in the Cathedral of Santa Maria, admiring the stunning neo-Gothic façade and artworks inside, such as the marble sculptures and grand 15th-century paintings. A few blocks from here is the medieval Tower Of The Elephant, an imposing limestone structure built by the Pisans in 1307 that represents the entrance to the Castello neighbourhood.

White limestone was also used to build the city’s walls, and the striking effect of the bright sunshine reflecting off them once prompted DH Lawrence to describe ››

Mane attraction: lion outside St Lorenzo Cathedral, Genoa tntMagazine.com

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Cagliari as a “white Jerusalem” after his visit here in the early 1920s.

DON’T MISS: Cagliari has a vibrant nightlife, much of which takes place in kiosks (chioschi) along the 8km-long stretch of beach, Poetto. Try kicking the evening off at Emerson (emersoncafe.it) for a couple of aperitivo, before moving on to Fico d’India, an upbeat, gay-friendly bar that’s great for dancing and live music. visit-cagliari.it

CLASSIC ITALY Be THERE, DO THAT

Trieste: capital of coffee

Drifting down Venetian canals While it’s great to get off the beaten track, don’t avoid the big-draw cities altogether – remember they’re popular for a reason. Fit at least one of these in: ROME Famous for its unparalleled artistic heritage, The Eternal City has been capturing the imagination of travellers for centuries. Millions of tourists flock to the Italian capital every year, with the Colosseum and the Vatican Museums being the most popular attractions.

MIDRANGE

LUXURY

Did you know? Starting in December 2012, the Colosseum began a 915-day makeover that will cost €25m (£20m). Try to Photoshop out the scaffolding!

Venice You don’t see a city entirely built on water every day.

La Serenissima is one of the most romantic places on the planet… and one of the most crowded. But don’t let the hordes of tourists put you off. Its picturesque canals are well worth the hassle.

Did you know? The Italian word ‘ciao’ originates from the Venetian dialect once spoken here. They used to greet one another saying, “Sciavo vostro” (“I am your slave”), which became ‘sciao’ and, finally, ‘ciao’.

Pisa The Leaning Tower of Pisa (pictured left) is one of the most iconic monuments in Italy. It stands in the spectacular Square of Miracles (Piazza dei Miracoli), near the Baptistry and the Cathedral Sqaure (Duomo).

Did you know? According to a Tuscan proverb, “It’s better to have a dead body in the house than a Pisan at the threshold.” Poor old Pisans.

Maybe the Tuscans are just jealous of their wonky tower.

Photos: Getty, Thinkstock

With its vibrant history, Trieste was last year voted one of the world’s most underrated travel destinations by Lonely Planet.

I pant my way up the steep alleys leading to the hilltop of San Giusto where I’m rewarded with breathtaking views of the history-rich city below.

A giant crane, symbolising Trieste’s naval heritage, is the most prominent figure in the harbour, while to the right, a grey dome stands out against the backdrop of rooftops and mountains. This belongs to the beautiful Serbia-Orthodox church, San Spiridione. A few steps away from here is the elegant colonnade of the Catholic church of Sant’Antonio Taumaturgo. Also nearby is one of Europe’s largest places of Jewish worship, the Synagogue Of Trieste. This city’s diversity is in part due to its proximity to the Slavic world and its past as the Austro-Hungarians’ only port on the Mediterranean.

I take a stroll to the charming Caffè San Marco (Via Cesare Battisti 18) for an invigorating espresso. My imagination travels back to when this was a famous rendezvous for intellectuals and the literati, such as James Joyce. The Mittel-European ambience and its decor haven’t changed in almost a century, nor have the way cafès such as this are used as places for people to meet and discuss culture and politics and gesticulate over a cup of Joe. Trieste is known as the capital of coffee and locals even have their own vocabulary for the black stuff. If you want an espresso, make sure you ask for a nero – in the rest of Italy, it’s still an espresso. A macchiato is a capo, but if you want it served in a glass, ask for a capo in b.

From here, I walk and admire the Neoclassical buildings of Piazza della Borsa, en route to Piazza Unità d’Italia, the main town square – the buildings’ golden decorations shine in the sun as passers-by stroll around the vast square overlooking the Adriatic Sea. From the tip of the Molo Audace, a pier stretching from the waterfront, I look back at the city and realise it’s no accident Trieste has bewitched so many writers and travellers over the years.

DON’T MISS: Trieste has its very own Grand Canal which is a more humble version of Venice’s famous waterways – perfect for an afternoon stroll as you check out the boats. turismofvg.it/locality/trieste ❚

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Salar de Uyuni BOLIVIA

BRAZIL PERU BOLIVIA LA PAZ Uyuni

46

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GETTING THERE British Airways (britishairways.com) offers daily connections from Heathrow to La Paz, via Miami, with onward travel on American Airlines, from around £800 return. Amaszonas (amaszonas. com) operates flights from La Paz to Uyuni from £155 return.

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BIGTRIP

One wild ride TNT revs its engine for a once-in-a-lifetime trip, motorbiking across Bolivia’s famous salt deserts. Just watch out for manholes Words GRAEME GREEN

WHEN TO GO: The dry season, from April to It’s been a while since I’ve been on the back bike roaring beneath me as I open the October, is the best time to visit of a bike and, at 650CC, the engine of this throttle. Any hint of dirt or dust from the the salt flats, although it can yellow and black Suzuki DR650 is a little land disappears as we ride deeper in. The get uncomfortably cold – pack landscape sparkles.

– well, 13 times – bigger than I’m used layers, and be prepared for minus In fact, its very luminescence presents to. “This one’s got a bit of oomph, so be temperatures overnight. The wet careful,” Robin, a Dagenham-born Bolivian a problem. As well as helmet, chunky boots season, from November to March, citizen, understates as he hands me the and jacket, Robin has kitted me out with is great for photos as the water key. I turn it in the ignition and listen to the a good pair of sunglasses, an essential piece covering the flats turns the desert satisfying purr of the motorbike’s engine. It of safety gear. The gleaming scenery, with takes a powerful lurch forward as I pull away into a big mirror, dramatically light bouncing around in all directions, reflecting the sky. and I stall a couple of times. I take it around has been known to cause sun-blindness, CURRENCY: the block to get the feel for it, then Robin headaches and other health problems for and I set off from the Bolivian town of Uyuni visitors. There are high rates of early onset 1 GBP = 11 Bolivianos for what has to be one of the most unique blindness among the people who work here.

ACCOMMODATION: landscapes on Earth.

Psychologically, the terrain is strange for A hostel bed in Uyuni costs Most backpackers I’ve spoken to during my between £12-£25. A night in a biker – it looks so much like ice and snow, travels around South America have put the it seems crazy to be riding at 120kph across a double room at the Luna Salada vast salt flats of Bolivia as their number-one it, as if the bike will slip and slide at any salt hotel costs from about £70 highlight. The Salar de Uyuni has 10,500sqkm moment. Actually, it’s quite firm. “You think (lunasaladahotel.com.bo). of brilliant white, almost Arctic landscape, it’s going to slide,” Robin says. “But it’s more with an estimated 10 billion tonnes of salt standing like riding on concrete than ice. There are some bits you ›› in for ice and snow.

It’s 20km on a bumpy road from Uyuni to the salt flats, Pyramids: salt collected from the flats and the outer edges of the flats are slushy as it’s been raining – a shallow layer of surface water perfectly reflects the clear, light blue sky. Men with shovels load trucks with perfect pyramids of collected salt.

We pause while Robin tells me the local legend for how the Salar de Uyuni was formed. “They say the lake was created by Tunupa, the mountain goddess,” he says. “She had a love affair with Oruso and they lived happily and had a child. But another mountain goddess came along and wanted the attention of Oruso. She seduced him and ran off with him. Tunupa cried when she found out. She was breastfeeding at the time. The salt tears and milk from her breast mixed together and formed the salt desert.”

(There are a few versions of this legend – one involving a Jeremy Kyle-esque paternity row over a baby volcano – but Tunupa’s tears and milk always form the salar at the end.)

The feeling as I witness the great pure white and blue of the salar open up in front of us is exhilarating, the tntMagazine.com

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Photos: Graeme Green/www.graemegreen.org, Getty, Thinkstock

Upside down: mucking about on the salt flats; the only wildlife; and on tour have to power through, where there’s some water on the surface, and other areas where it’s smooth or even crunchy.

The ground’s always changing.”

We pass a salt hotel, the original and only remaining one on the salt flats. Due to the venues polluting the salt lake, building on the flats is now forbidden. The newer salt hotels are built around the edges.

The 80km from the hotel to Incahuasi island – a rocky spot in the middle of the salt flats that is covered with cacti – is pure pleasure as we open the bikes right out. There are no roads, only faint tyre tracks from tourist vehicles that converge close to the island. Local drivers navigate using markers such as the Tunupa volcano and other peaks surrounding the flats. We do the same, picking a freestyle route that heads loosely in the direction of the dark mass of land far ahead, just an hour from the border with Chile.

Pulling up at the island, where tourist jeeps are parked, other visitors eye our bikes enviably. One of the fun knockon effects of doing the Salar de Uyuni by motorbike is how undeniably cool it looks compared to the standard 4x4 tours.

“You feel alive on a motorbike,” Robin tells me over lunch. “But here you also get the experience of the vast openness. It’s spectacular riding, but pretty easy, too.”

There are no roads, few tracks and no other vehicles all afternoon as we head out into the open salar where other tourists don’t tend to go. The immense landscape is ours alone and we make full use of it, riding in big swooping lines across the great, wide-open desert.

There are times when Robin’s just a dark speck on the horizon, other times we loop around and cross each other’s tracks, like two lone skaters on what feels like the world’s biggest rink. Other than big salt eyes – holes in the ground 48

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caused by the salt expanding and contracting with changes in temperature – there’s no real danger, even at this speed.

If there was anything out here to hit, we’d see it from miles away, the only non-white object on the entire landscape.

We reach the slushy shore and leave the flats, riding along the edge to the train cemetery outside Uyuni – a famous attraction where rusted trains languish, 3km from town.

Distracted by the scenery, I don’t see a corner coming, hit a deep patch of sand and get thrown from the bike. I climb

Stunning: a giant mosaic of naturally formed hexagons

back on and keep riding, with pain in my left thumb (from the handlebars) and a bleeding right elbow. I nearly come off again when another deep ridge of sand on the uneven road makes it difficult to keep the front tyre straight. To top it off, a car screeches to a halt at a crossing in town, missing me only narrowly.

We arrive, in one piece, at the train cemetery as the sun sets behind a silhouette of hulking rusted trains, abandoned engines and carriages covered in graffiti. “This is a bleak and desolate place,” Robin says. “I think they’re a bit beyond restoration, don’t you?”

The train yard, Robin explains, was the birthplace of football in South America. British engineers came here in the 19th century to design and build Bolivia’s trains and rail network, bringing ‘the beautiful game’ with them, which spread quickly across the land.

I climb up on to one of the engines to get a better angle for a photo and nearly fall down a deep manhole, my fourth near miss today. I’m starting to think today might be ‘my time’ and that Death is, Final Destination-style, trying to catch up with me. I hope not. Although as last days on Earth go, this has been a pretty good one.

“

Death is trying to catch up with me

”

After dropping the bikes in town, I take a taxi to the hilltop Luna Salada Hotel. There are less expensive places to spend a night in Uyuni, but if you’re only passing this way once, a stay in a salt hotel makes for a novel experience. The walls of the grand, almost castle-like hotel, inside and out, are made entirely from blocks of creamy salt cut through with brown veins of mud. The interior feels light, airy and natural. Rooms are comfy, with gas fires and hot showers.

Beds, strewn with thick blankets, are carved from salt. The floor in the bedroom is a kind of crushed salt gravel, which continues down the hallways too, where there are relaxation areas: the walls, arches, tables and chairs all also created ››

Flamingoland: by the red lagoon

BEST OF THE REST Bolivia’s biggest thrills There’s more than one adrenalin rush to be had in Bolivia. Here’s TNT’s pick of the best:

1 HORSE TREKKING AROUND TUPIZA The Bolivian landscape continually changes from extreme to extreme, and is always – without fail – stunning. Tupiza is a jumping off point near the border with Argentina from which to explore the desolate salt desert, but you should also make time to check out Tupiza’s surrounding ‘Wild West’ scenery. The red rocks, rubble and cacti are straight out of a Hollywood Western, which makes sense because this is the area in which the real-life Billy the Kid hid from the law. A horse trek – complete with cowboy hat – is the ideal way to traverse the terrain. You can book tours in town that take anywhere between three and seven hours. Aim for an English-speaking guide (seldom included, so ask!), otherwise you’ll miss out on the historical tidbits.

2 MOUNTAINBIKING DOWN DEATH ROAD Just outside La Paz lies the world’s most dangerous road, a twisting dirt track just 3.2 metres wide that gives way to sheer drops of 4000 metres. Plucky backpackers race down the road on mountain bikes while dodging the notoriously erratic Bolivian traffic, earning a buffet lunch, a survivor’s T-shirt and a beer at the bottom (assuming you don’t plunge over the edge). In all seriousness, this is a potentially fatal rite of passage on the backpacker trail, and shouldn’t be undertaken lightly. If you do want to do it, make sure it’s with Gravity Bolivia, the most reputable company in town, and also providers of the best bikes.

See: gravitybolivia.com 3 BUNGEE JUMPING IN LA PAZ/ COCHABAMBA Whichever location you choose, the formula is the same – jump from a big bridge with a view of rugged mountains beyond and get a serious adrenaline rush. We hear good things about local operator AndesXtremo, which also offers climbing, canoeing, kayaking, rafting and paragliding.

See: andesxtremo.com

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from salt. But it’s not until the following morning that I realise another of the hotel’s big selling points. I’d arrived after dark, but over breakfast, in a dining room made of salt, I sit close to a wall-length window that looks out from the high hillside and take in the scene. There’s a clear view of the jagged crater of Tunupa to the north, while right in front of the hotel is a grassy slope where llamas graze. Beyond it, gleaming whiteness that stretches to and beyond the horizon, the desert of milk and tears. ❚ One-day motorbiking packages on the Salar de Uyuni start from £150pp (for two people) motorcycletoursbolivia.com. Rainbow Tours Latin America offers a 10-night package including La Paz, Salar de Uyuni, Lake Titicaca and Sucre from £1400pp based on two sharing, including hostel accommodation, dinner and breakfast.

Kilimanjaro THE AFRICAN SPECIALISTS 30 YEARS OVERLANDING IN AFRICA Reach for the sky! Trek to ‘the roof of Africa’ at 5,895 metres with our local Tanzanian team. Led by chief guide Samson Lauwo, climb Kilimanjaro with the experts.

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The Insider's guide Pedro Nunez, a Bolivian tour guide, gives us the inside track on one of South America’s most rewarding countries. (The TNT stick pictured isn’t real. We hope.)

What’s the one thing anyone coming to Bolivia should see or do?

Lake Titicaca and Salar de Uyuni are the big things that everyone does. I’d also recommend seeing Sucre and Potosi, Rurrenabaque, the Jesuit missions and Santa Cruz.

What makes Bolivia unique, compared to other countries in South America?

It’s located at the centre of South America and retains a bit of each country that surrounds it. Also the diversity of its geography, its culture and its people.

Apart from Uyuni and La Paz, which lots of travellers see, what are some more offbeat places that should be on the list of places to go?

Coroico, for its climate, geography and cultural diversity. Also, Torotoro National Park for their footprints of dinosaurs, caves, customs, and their guns.

Are there any hidden gems in Bolivia that you’d recommend travellers make the effort to see?

The Icla Canyon and its surroundings. And also the crater of Maragua near Sucre.

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TNT_2013_Advert_OCT

04/10/2013

09:05

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VAL D’ISERE – DECEMBER 20-29, 2013

BY ACTION-OUTDO ORS.CO.UK

Join The TNT Snowblast Tour to Val d’Isere this Christmas!

TNT Magazine & Action Outdoors have partnered up to bring you The TNT Snowblast Tour – have a White Christmas to remember in Val d’Isere The TNT Snowblast Tour – a 9 day trip to Val d’Isere, France: 20th Dec – 29th Dec 2013

• 6½-day liftpass for Espace Killy ski area • 6½-day Ski or Snowboard and boot hire • 12 hours of group Instruction • 7 nights accommodation at UCPA Val d’Isere • ALL meals, including TWO Christmas celebrations • Après-ski events every day • TNT Ski merchandise • Return coach from London

£599*

Book online at: www.tnt-snowblast.com BROUGHT TO YOU BY

*Book now for only £599 and save yourself £75 on the regular price

tntMagazine.com

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TRAVEL 54

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TRAVEL tntMagazine.com

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APRIL 25TH

plona, La Tom with FFT to Pam d lle ve tra ve ha “I al Rock! “ xt? - First Festiv ne re he W . st fe and Oktober

The 25th April is one of New Zealand and Australia’s most important days, where we remember the ANZAC’s who have fought bravely, and especially those in WW1. Whether you choose Turkey or The Western Front in Belgium you will be left with lasting memories of the sites visited and the rememberance services that we will share. We have various tours on sale now for all our packages in 2014

Gallipoli We have a variety of packages from 2 days - 2 weeks. You can experience the diverse culture of Turkey, visit some of the worlds most famous hertiage sites.

The Dawn Service at ANZAC Cove will be a poignant reminder of those lives lost.

fr £109

Western Front

INCLUDES ALL TRANSPORT

This 4 day experience is very passionate to us at FFT, with Kiwi, Australian and local historians as guides, you will be moved at the loss of lives and the impact the ANZAC’s had on this campaign. Vist The Somme,Ypres and much more.

fr £219

CHRISTMAS & NEW YEARS 24 -29TH DEC + 27TH DEC -1ST JAN

Packages from

£399

Our popular SNOWBALL package is a great Xmas or New Years option to see two of Russia’s greatest cities. The beautiful city of St Petersburg see the Hermitage and in Moscow visit Red Square, The Kremlin and much more

FFT-7th 2013.indd 1

XMAS MARKETS

7-8TH DEC 14-15TH DEC BELGIUM

£139

TRAVEL

Packages from

The city of Brugges is well known for it’s winter wonderland of xmas markets not to mention the beer, the chocolate and other gastronomic delights. Our weekend package includes coach transport and hotel accommodation and vist to Brugges & Brussels Join us for some Xmas cheer

ho

HOGMANAY 2013

um of ce

EDINBURGH 30TH DEC - 2ND JAN

Packages from

£239

The city of Edinburgh plays host to Europes biggest New Years street party.

Packages are now on sale for you to experience the party of the year. Street party, band Parades ,mid winter swims and traditional dancing are just a few things you can experience.

e

RUGBY FRANCE

9

9TH NOV PARIS

Packages from

£189

The All Blacks are back in November, to take on the French, who will have much to prove after their NZ Series and we all know how unpredicable they are! We have Eurostar/ Hotel packages or if you want to make your own way just Hotel packages. See our website for full itinearies

e

ct

SELLING FAST

9

RUGBY IRELAND 24TH NOV DUBLIN

Packages from

£169

Join us in Dublin for a weekend of Rugby Craic ! The locals are always keen for a party and we’re pretty keen to have a go with them!

Our packages are both Hostel or Hotel and all city centre. Please note this game is being played on Sunday afternoon.

N

99

eat

n d

SELLING FAST Full Itineraries can be found on our website First Festival Travel, 68 North End Road, London W14 9EP. Closest Tube: West Kensington

tntMagazine.com

Packages from

£159

57

02/10/2013 15:09:39

Egypt

North America 15% OFF

20% OFF

Vegas to the Coast

8 DAY

WAS £1175

WAS £925

13, 20 & 27 October 2013

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12 DAY

£999

Visits Austin, Momument Valley & Vegas

Essential Egypt

17 October 2013

£786

Visits Vegas, Grand Canyon, & Yosemite

£358

Includes US$190 Local Payment

18 DAY

NOW

WAS £1880

£1692

TNT13_39 07 Oct

Visits 10 countries including Switzerland, Slovenia, Hungary & Czech Republic

L8291 / Y2992

10% OFF

EuroClub

Winter Getaway 2 November 2013

14 DAY

NOW

WAS £1210

£1012

Includes £220 Food Fund

EuroHotel

Winter Wonder 10 Nov & 6 Dec 2013

20% OFF

Visits 8 countries including Germany, France, Italy & Belgium

24 DAY

28 November 2013

WAS £1330

WAS £1555

£1197

Visits 7 countries including France, Italy, Austria, Germany & Belgium

EuroClub

Winter Spirit

NOW

13 December 2013

£419

Includes US$210 Local Payment

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Discover Winter

26 Oct, 2 & 9 Nov 2013

WAS £491

in Winter EuroHotel

Pyramids & Beaches

WAS £418

Europe 20 DAY

15 DAY

NOW

19 October 2013

FROM

Southwest States

£1296

Includes £260 Food Fund Visits 8 countries including Germany, France, Italy & Belgium

*Terms and conditions apply. Prices quoted are for specific departures only. All trips subject to availability. Discounts are off the base trip price only, and do not apply to food funds and local payments. Flights not included.

For full terms and conditions please visit www.topdeck.travel

2 Day Brugge Christmas Markets

4 Day Brugge Christmas

4 Day Paris Christmas

24 – 27 Dec 2013

24 – 27 Dec 2013

There’s no better way to experience a winter Christmas than taking in the sights, sounds and smells of the famous Brugge Christmas Markets for the weekend.

Spend your Christmas visiting one of Europe’s hidden gems – Brugge! Explore the amazing architecture, see the meandering canals and sample some delicious Belgian specialities of chocolate, waffles and beer! We even take a day trip to Belgium’s capital, Brussels.

From the Eiffel Tower, to the Louvre museum, the famed French cuisine and the amazing Parisian cabarets, the sights and sounds of Paris will stay with you long after your Christmas feasts have been eaten!

What’s Included: 1 breakfast, 1 dinner, 1 night multi-share hostel accommodation, return coach from London (including ferry crossings), walking tour of Brugge and escorted services of a European trained Topdeck Trip Leader & Driver.

What’s Included: 3 breakfasts, 3 nights multi-share hostel accommodation, Belgian Christmas lunch, return coach from London including ferry crossings, walking tours of Brugge & Brussels & escorted services of a European trained Topdeck Trip Leader & Driver.

£149 per person

£249 per person

£269

4 Day Berlin New Year

4 Day Amsterdam New Year

4 Day Hogmanay Edinburgh

7 – 8, 14 – 15 & 21 – 22 Dec 2013

29 Dec 2013 – 1 Jan 2014

Join Topdeck in Berlin for New Year and celebrate in Germany’s party-loving capital! Stay in quality hostel accommodation and enjoy an included walking tour of Berlin. This is your chance to experience some of Europe’s best nightlife, so join like-minded Topdeckers in Berlin and see out the year in style!

29 Dec 2013 – 1 Jan 2014

What’s Included: 3 breakfasts, 1 dinner, French Christmas lunch, 3 nights multi-share hotel accommodation, return coach from London including ferry crossings, Seine River Cruise, ‘City Lights’ tour of Paris & escorted services of a European trained Topdeck Trip Leader & Driver.

per person

30 Dec 2013 – 2 Jan 2014

Ring in the New Year in one of the most famous cities in Europe. Alternatively, you could cruise along the waters of Amsterdam’s famous canal network, or enjoy a night in the equally as famous (and utterly bonkers) Red Light district!

What’s Included: 3 breakfasts, 1 dinner, 3 nights multishare hotel accommodation, orientation tour of Berlin, New Year celebrations at Brandenburg Gate & escorted services of a European trained Topdeck Trip Leader.

Join the world’s most famous New Year celebrations with Topdeck at Hogmanay in Edinburgh! This huge street party gets more popular each year, and Edinburgh never fails to disappoint.

What’s Included: 3 breakfasts, 3 nights multi-share hostel accommodation, New Year’s Eve drinks, snacks & fireworks party, return coach from London including ferry crossings, canal cruise dinner, orientation tour of Amsterdam & escorted services of a European trained Topdeck Trip Leader & Driver.

What’s Included: 3 breakfasts, 3 nights accommodation in multi-share hotel, return coach from London, Hogmanay Street Party ticket, Edinburgh City Tour, half- day trip to Stirling Castle, trip t-shirt & escorted services of a European trained Topdeck Trip Leader & Driver.

£219

£279

£339

per person

Check out the 12 Day Festive Escape trip Includes Cologne, Baden-Baden, Berlin, Amsterdam & Paris!

CALL 0845 257 5210

Open 8am-9pm

per person

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Christmas & New Year in Europe

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ter

Plus loads more win trips online...

tntMagazine.com

59

TRAVEL

FAVOURITE EAST EUROPE & FESTIVAL TOUR OPERATOR 2012

CELEBRATE IN STYLE

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FRANCE, BELGIUM & HOLLAND DEPARTS LONDON 24 DEC 2013

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POLAND, SLOVAKIA, HUNGARY, AUSTRIA & CZECH REPUBLIC DEPARTS KRAKOW / PRAGUE 22 DEC 2013

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★ Christmas markets ★ New Year’s Eve in Berlin ★ Winter Wonderland of Lauterbrunnen, Switzerland ★ Skiing or

★ Traditional Christmas markets ★ Skiing on Christmas Day ★ A traditional Polish Christmas dinner ★ Budapest’s thermal pools ★ New Year’s Eve on the Charles Bridge, Prague ★ Cesky Krumlov

H IGH LIGH TS ★ Christmas Eve Welcome Party ★ Picnic at the Palace of Versailles ★ Paris bike tour ★ Climb up the Eiffel Tower ★ Boat cruise along the River Seine ★ Bruges Christmas markets★ New Year celebrations at Dam Square ★ Orientation walk of the Red Light District ★ Amsterdam bike tour

and canal cruise

snowboarding in Austria and Switzerland ★ Visit the Top of Europe, Switzerland ★ Paris night bike tour

and its castle

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0870-898 8996 tntforex.com

TRAVEL

HOGMANAY

SOCCEROOS DON’T MISS THE SOCCEROOS IN LONDON! ■ AUS v CANADA Fulham TUE 15 OCT fr£15

EDINBURGH’S MASSIVE NYE PARTY!

✔ Aussie supporters’ bay ✔ Fanatics cap/beanie

■ 3 Night Hostel 30 DEC-2 JAN

RUGBY UNION

ALL BLACKS

WALLABIES

■ AUS v ENGLAND Twickenham SAT 2 NOV £79 ✔ Choice of cat 2 or 4 seating ✔ Fanatics cap or beanie

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£279

✔ Accom ideally located in the absolute heart of town ✔ Edinburgh street party pass ✔ Superb pubs, bars & clubs ✔ Funky tour t-shirt

■ NZ v FRANCE Paris SAT 9 NOV fr£169 ✔ Match ticket ✔ One night hotel ✔ Optional Eurostar Dublin SUN 24 NOV fr£159 ■ NZ v IRELAND ✔ Match ticket ✔ One or two nights hotel

RUGBY LEAGUE WORLD CUP IN THE UK! n Australia v England Cardiff SAT 26 OCT

£199

■ 3 Night Hotel 30 DEC-2 JAN £219 ■ 4 Day Coach/Hostel Tour 30 DEC-2 JAN

FOOTBALL ENGLISH PREMIER LEAGUE ■ Fulham v Liverpool Anfield ■ Fulham v Swansea

fr£30

✔ Optional coach transfers ✔ Plus Wales v Italy match Wembley SAT 23 NOV fr£20 n Semi-Finals n Final Old Trafford SAT 30 NOV fr£30 ✔ Optional coach transfer ✔ Optional accommodation

SAT 9 NOV ON SALE SOON SAT 23 NOV £39

SANTA PUB CRAWL ANNUAL XMAS PUB CRAWL

SUN 8DEC £29

✔ Private red double-decker party bus ✔ Santa suit & hat included ✔ Group Santa photos at London’s famous sites

XMAS & NYE PARIS COMBO ■ SKIFEST XMAS & PARIS NYE

£649

20 DEC-1 JAN ✔ 7 Nights Risoul ✔ 4 Nights Paris ST! HE BE AND T T S E IGG THE B INAL, E ORIG H .T ..

ST SKIFE

XMAS WEEK TOURS RISOUL, FRENCH ALPS

£499

■ COACHTOUR 20-28 DEC ✔ Depart London Friday evening ✔ Gets back Sat 29 ✔ 6 days skiing

£629

■ FLIGHTTOUR 21-28 DEC ✔ 6 days skiing ✔ Flights & resort transfers

£379

■ MAKE OWN WAY 21-28 DEC ✔ 6 days skiing ✔ Optional Geneva Transfer

AMAZING EARLY BIRD SPECIALS

NEW YEAR’S WEEK TOURS RISOUL, FRENCH ALPS

£519

■ COACHTOUR 27 DEC-4 JAN ✔ Depart London Fri eve ✔ 6 days skiing

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■ FLIGHTTOUR 28 DEC-3 JAN ✔ 6 days skiing ✔ Flights & resort transfers ■ MAKE OWN WAY 28 DEC-4 JAN

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✔ 6 days skiing ✔ Optional Geneva Transfer

INCREDIBLE ALL-INCLUSIVE VALUE! ✔ Return transport from London ✔ Ski lift pass ✔ Ski/Snowboard hire ✔ Optional b’fast & dinner daily in resort ✔ Legendary Skifest parties & theme nights ✔ Amazing Xmas & NYE celebrations

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BOOK ONLINE NOW! www.thefanatics.com or call 0207 240 3223 COVENT GARDEN OFFICE 1st

Floor, 15 New Row, Covent Garden, WC2N 4LD Mon - Fri 9am - 6pm

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classifieds Care work

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14/11/2012 17:41

VAL D’ISERE – DECEMB ER 20-29, 2013

BY ACTION -OUTDO ORS.CO .UK

Join The TNT Snowblast Tour to Val d’Isere this Christmas!

TNT Magazine & Action Outdoors have partnered up to bring you The TNT Snowblast Tour – have a White Christmas to remember in Val d’Isere The TNT Snowblast Tour – a 9 day trip to Val d’Isere, France: 20th Dec – 29th Dec 2013

• 6½-day liftpass for Espace Killy ski area • 6½-day Ski or Snowboard and boot hire • 12 hours of group Instruction • 7 nights accommodation at UCPA Val d’Isere • ALL meals, including TWO Christmas celebrations • Après-ski events every day • TNT Ski merchandise • Return coach from London

£599*

Book online at: www.tnt-snowblast.com BROUGHT TO YOU BY

*Book now for only £599 and save yourself £75 on the regular price