TNT Magazine / Issue 1502

June 11-17 2012 Issue 1502 tntmagazine.com

WIN!

WEEKEND TIC KETS TO NEWQUA Y’S RELENTLESS SURF FESTIVAL

FEAR, FUNNIES AND Y-FRONTS Simon Pegg on playing a recluse in his new film

RHYTHM OF THE NIGHT Feel the beat of Brazil in Salvador

TOP WEIRD MUSEUMS From cocks and carrots to crime and currywurst

!

R E M M U S O T CHEERS rrace bars e t f o o r d n a r gardens e e b t s e b ’s n o Londo Your guide t + 48 HOURS IN SINGAPORE TOP 5 ROAD TRIPS GET A JOB IN TEACHING LATE TRAVEL DEALS TNT 1502 Cover.indd 1

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CAROL DRIVER EDITOR carol.driver@tntmagazine.com

EDITOR’S LETTER There really is nothing better than sitting in a beer garden in London, drink in hand, sunshine on your back. Turn to P8 for our guide to the best pubs and roof terraces in the capital – weather permitting. If beer’s your drink of choice, do what our writer did and head to Derby, the capital of ale, to become a brewer for the day (P58). And, of course, you get to drink your wares when you’re finished. What more do you need? Enjoy!

THIS WEEK LONDONDIARY

4-5

LONDONNEWS

6

MY LONDON DRINK & EATS

14 16-17

@TNT

18

SPOTTED

21

LONDON SOUND

22-23

LISTINGS CLUB & GIGS

24-25

COMPETITION

26

CHATROOM ROSS LEARMOUTH 27 LONDON SCENE

28-29

LIFESTYLE

34-41

HEALTH & BEAUTY

34-35

CAREERS

36-37

LIVING

40-41

NEWS & SPORT

42-43

TRAVEL

55-78

DIARY

56

NEWS

57

LATE DEALS

60

HOTSHOTS

63

TOP FIVE

64-65

TIPS & STUFF

66-67

30

FEATURES TAKE IT OUTSIDE There is no better city for a spot of rooftop boozing or al fresco dining

FEAR AND LOATHING

MISSION TO LARS

CLASSIFIEDS

Derby has been named a must-see this year as Britain’s first city for ale

Photos: Getty; TNT Cover: Getty

106

46

Metallica journey is the latest in a growing movement of social action films

GRIN AND BEER IT

DESPERATELY SEEKING

74

30

Simon Pegg opens up about his latest film, A Fantastic Fear Of Everything

48 HOURS IN...SINGAPORE 72-73 80

8

YEP, THAT’S WEIRD

58

68

Europe’s stranger cultural collections, from cocks and condoms to currywurst

BRAZILIAN DREAMS

46

74

Explore the northern state of Bahia to feel the Afro-Brazilian rhythm in Salvador

68 TNTMAGAZINE.COM

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EDITORIAL Editor Carol Driver Sub editor Jahn Vannisselroy Content editors: Acting Travel Laura Chubb Entertainment Alasdair Morton News & sport Tom Sturrock Web Oliver Jones Staff writer Clare Vooght Staff writer/editorial assistant Rebecca Kent

LONDONDIARY

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Bogans: stop breeding with them

DESIGN AND PRODUCTION Head of design and production Jon Cooke Acting picture researcher Ruth Board DIGITAL & IT Head of digital marketing and development Syed Ahmad Social Media Coordinator Dan Thorne SALES Commercial director David Alstin Sales manager Jaqui Ward Classified Ad Manager Matt Syder Sales executives Tyler Harrison | Eddie Clinton | Donovan Smith | Michael Fair | Marie Smith Sales administrator Abby Nightingale MARKETING & EVENTS Marketing and events assistant Phoebe Cherrill ACCOUNTS Margaret Roberts | Suzanne Welsh TNT MULTIMEDIA LTD CEO Kevin Ellis Chairman Ken Hurst PUBLISHER TNT Multimedia Limited DISTRIBUTION Emblem Direct Ltd PRINTED BY Wyndeham Peterborough Limited NEWS AAP SAPA NZPA PICTURES Getty Images, TNT Images, Thinkstock TNT Magazine , 16 Brune St, London, E1 7NJ tntmagazine.com General enquiries Phone 020 7953 8469 Fax 020 7953 7957 Email enquiries@tntmagazine.com SALES ENQUIRIES

PHONE 020 7989 0567 EMAIL sales@tntmagazine.com WHERE TO GET TNT

COVER PRICE: £1 where sold

Shhh... SECRET LONDON BOGAN BINGO THE UNDERDOG

A little taste of home, in some truly wrong ways, this gag-fest pub-game show started out in Melbourne and, by the looks of its ace run in London and Edinburgh Festival shows in August, is set to bring bingo to a whole new crowd. Instead of blue rinses, it’s stonewashed denim, mullet-overload and some cheesy Eighties rock that makes Angus Young and his cohorts sound like envelope-pushing artistes. So get down, grab a brew and join the big time bogan-fest. Be as bloody obnoxious as possible! £5

Thursday. 7.30pm-10pm 16a Clapham Common, SW4 7AB

Clapham Common

BRAINS

SMALL CAR BIG CITY

CARLSBERG SPORTS BAR

We all have one, some more used than others, but even the experts know little about it.

This exhibition looks at how our understanding of the brain has developed, how it’s been misunderstood, and includes diagrams, artworks, surgical instruments, and, of course, a couple of famous human brains.

Fascinatingly ick-tastic.

Take a private tour of the capital that is quite unlike another, a miniadventure all of your own, in these Mini Cooper tours (the original classics, not the current BMW monsters).

You’ll be whizzed about town, enjoy a ‘Royal Tour’, as well as a spin around Westminster. It’ll be difficult not to imagine yourself in The Italian Job, though.

Freshly opened and showing all the Euro matches, as well as running throughout summer with all the sporting action – Murray’s Wimbledon campaign, full coverage of the Olympics – this is the newest place to catch the sporting action.

It’s open 24 hours a day, seven days as week, with a balcony bar and grub deals, too.

Until June 17 NW1 2BE Euston wellcomecollection.org

Dates and times vary SW1H 0BD St James’s Park smallcarbigcity.com

Daily until September WC2H 7NA Leicester Square thecasinolsq.com

SEE tntmagazine.com/findtnt for pick-up points or tntmagazine.com/emag to read TNT online SUBSCRIPTIONS AND DISTRIBUTION Caroline Penn 01603 559004

facebook.com/boganbingouk

All thieves of TNT bins will be prosecuted.

FREE

TNT Magazine is printed on paper from sustainable forests. There is no business connection between the proprietors of this magazine and TNT Ltd, the worldwide transportation group. Copyright here and abroad of all original materials is held by TNT Magazine.

Reproduction in whole or part is forbidden, except with permission of the publishers.

Registered as a newspaper at the Post Office.

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£54+

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You’ve got three guesses …

SECRET CINEMA Undisclosed

What began as a small undertaking has bloomed into a institution. The premise, though – immersive cinema, the identity of which is kept a secret – remains joyously undampened by the pull of the mainstream. There are more flocking to these events than ever before, but the experience of walking into the world of the film you’re about to watch has remained undimmed. Powerful and admirable. £35+

Until July 1 Revealed on purchase of ticket

secretcinema.org

HAMPTON COURT PALACE FEST

EAST LONDON COMICS FEST

If the thought of another concert in very English surrounds doesn’t have you running for the hills, then check out this south-of-the-river show.

The eclectic line-up includes Liza Minelli, Frankie Valli and John Barrowman (from Torchwood) with elegant palatial surrounds. It might not rain this time, too.

Fingers crossed, as always.

This comics and arts fest in the heart of London’s thriving creative centre has talks from some of the industry’s brightest stars, workshops to get feedback on your own work, and a host of Shoreditch bands on hand for the evening gig. Soundtrack your illustrative cravings with some rock n’ roll.

£30+

Photos: Mariusz Czajkowski; Laura Little and George Torode

TBC

June 14-24 Hampton Court KT8 9AU hamptoncourtpalacefestival.com

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FREE

Sunday, 10am-6pm Village Underground, EC2A 3PQ Shoreditch High Street elcaf.co.uk

8/6/12 18:11:24

LONDONNEWS

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@tntmagazine

‘PRESTIGIOUS’ GAMES TICKETS GO ON SALE Not bagged Olympics tickets yet? Now could be the time – that is, if you’ve a spare couple of grand handy.

The latest bout of passes went on sale on Friday, however, Olympic bosses came under fire over events – including the opening and closing ceremonies – costing up to £1800. London 2012 organisers say the high prices help to subsidise the cheap tickets on offer to the public.

Prestige Ticketing, which is selling 80,000 Olympics and Paralympics tickets, said: “The income from these programmes provides a vital source of revenue that makes the Games more accessible.”

Having spent a considerable amount of time in Streatham, my solutions for supporting the High Road mostly involve napalm

She couldn’t bear to hear another Coldplay song

Germany is bravest nation London Dungeon conducts (highly scientific) investigation

Forget the stiff upper lip, it seems the British are among the world’s biggest scaredy cats, according to highly conclusive research.

The comment that led to Lambeth Council The nation ranked fourth, behind press officer Sam Masters leaving his job France, Italy and Brazil for ‘scare thresholds’, in a study carried out by CHELSEA BID FAIL TO London Dungeon.

BUY POWER STATION The attraction hired renowned ‘thrill engineer’ Professor Brendan Walker to Battersea Power Station has been conduct tests on visitors and come up bought by a Malaysian company, with top 10 rankings. beating Chelsea FC’s bid to turn it into Stimuli from live rats to maggota football stadium. infested meat were used to study people’s SP Setia and Sime Darby bought the responses, including heart rate, sweat 39-acre site on the south bank of the River levels and facial expressions.

Thames for £400m.

Germany was bravest nation, closely Wandsworth Council said the deal, followed by the US, Hungary, India, which would see a new Tube station built, Sweden and Scotland. The French were was “potentially very good news”.

ON THE TUBE

the easiest to scare. Prof Walker said: “I would certainly have anticipated France, Italy and Brazil would come high up the list of most ‘scared’, but am surprised at the US, England and Scotland ‘squeamishness’ – hardly in keeping with the stereotypes of the unshakeable British Bulldog or Scotland the Brave.”

London Dungeon will use the findings to introduce an international rating system across its shows so guests know what level of scare they’re in for.

General manager Ben Sweet said: “We are attracting a wider diversity of guests than ever before, with new international markets opening up, and there are definitely differences in the way nationalities react to the shows and experiences here.”

THIS WEEK IN LONDON...

THIS WEEK’S CLOSURES

CENTRAL: No service between Marble Arch and Bethnal Green all weekend.

METROPOLITAN: No service between Wembley Park, Uxbridge and Northwood all weekend. Rail replacement buses will be in operation.

NORTHERN: No service between High Barnet and Camden Town until about 8.45am on Sunday.

WATERLOO: No service on Sundays.

Photos: Getty

6

Yes, it’s still rattling along. This week, prime minister David Cameron is among a string of high-profile politicians due to appear before the Leveson Inquiry.

Joining him in giving evidence at London’s Royal Courts of Justice will be deputy Nick Clegg, chancellor George Osborne, and former PM Gordon Brown.

Cameron is bound to face questioning over his relationship with ex-News International CEO Rebekah Brooks after a string of text messages sent between the pair were revealed when she gave evidence to the inquiry into press regulations.

And discussions will surround whether culture secretary Jeremy Hunt acted properly when overseeing Rupert Murdoch’s BSkyB bid. Expect fireworks. Or maybe cream pies.

Big moment: David Cameron

TNTMAGAZINE.COM

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FREEPHONE 0800 151 3511 Anglo Pacific International Plc, 5/9 Willen Field Road, Park Royal, London, NW10 7BQ Email: baggage@anglopacific.co.uk Hours: Mon-Fri 8.30am - 6.00pm Sat 9am-1pm

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Lush: The Roof Gardens

T

Take it outside It’s getting warmer, and there is no better place for a spot of rooftop boozing or al fresco dining than London WORDS ALASDAIR MORTON It’s summer, which means one thing – sun, beers and BBQs. But in London, where there is a bountiful choice of beer gardens and rooftop bars, al fresco drinking and dining takes on a whole different meaning.

Whether it’s clasping on to a brew in an enormous outdoor pub setting, sports playing out before you on a flatscreen; supping cocktails on a stylish rooftop terrace with panoramic views of the city; or relaxing in a leafy, ornate riverside watering hole, the capital has it all to offer.

The Roof Gardens in Kensington is a luxurious haven in the sky, its 1.5 acres of highly cultivated surrounds a world apart from the hustle and bustle of the busy street below.

“A night at The Roof Gardens is a unique experience that has something for everyone,” club manager Matt Roper says. “You can dine at one of our summer BBQs, watch the sun set in the Spanish gardens, say hello to one of our four flamingos or hit the dancefloor until the early hours.

“No two nights are the same – every week we introduce new DJs 8

in the clubhouse or bands, and every month we host a spectacular fireworks display.”

Across the city, east London is no slouch either. The Queen of Hoxton has its own rooftop bar, with a plethora of special events going on this summer.

“The London bar scene is really exciting at the moment,” PR manager Freya Coote says. “There is such a variety of places to go to. Hoxton is one of the largest, non-members rooftop bars and kitchens in east London, offering some of the most amazing views of the city.

“You can spend the whole day up there and be fed and watered to your heart’s content.”

Hoxton also has ‘silly sports day’ No Sweat coming up in July and hosts one-off parties throughout the summer, as well as a full live music and arts programme. It is also one of two stunning venues, along with The Roof Gardens, to host The Rooftop Film Club.

If it’s straight-up beers and BBQ you’re after, though, then you need look no further than The Ship, on the banks of the Thames in Wandsworth.

“It’s not only a vibrant and popular destination pub in south-west London, it’s also a cherished haunt of foodies,” manager Oisin Rogers says.

“Famed for our open kitchen and barbecue, which serves our sprawling beer garden, highlights include our Thursday and Sunday night live bands, our regular live Irish music and weekly quiz nights.”

As the world’s eyes focus upon London as the Olympics take centre stage, there will be no better place, or time, to grab a beer, enjoy the show, and soak up the scenery.

“With so much going on in the capital this summer, our pubs and bars are coming to the fore as the place for people to be as they watch the action unfold,“ Roper adds.

We’ll drink to that.

MORE ROOFTOP BARS & BEER GARDENS ›› The Rooftop Gardens W8 5SA High Street Kensington roofgardens.virgin.com The Queen of Hoxton EC2A 3JX Shoreditch High Street queenofhoxton.com The Ship SW18 1TB Wandsworth Town theship.co.uk

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The Queen of Hoxton in east London

Gardens the skysummer in west London Cheers toina great

Down by the river: Wandsworth’s The Ship TNTMAGAZINE.COM

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GRAND UNION BRIXTON Chill-out in one of the four Thai-style tree-houses in this huge jungle of outside space, which seats about 300.

There’s also a fountain, as well as park benches with fancy white umbrellas overhead to shield drinkers from the sun (hopefully).

Different coloured lights are switched on during the evening, giving the place a magical vibe. Sup bespoke cocktails or fizzy stuff and chow down on burgers, pizza or hang out ‘til they fire up the BBQ.

THE PROSPECT OF WHITBY WAPPING

FREE

Late night: Fri & Sat til 2am 123 Acre Lane, SW2 5UA Clapham High Street grandunionbars.com

Granted, it’s an unlikely place to find a beer garden, but, dating back to 1520, The Prospect is London’s oldest riverside pub – so expect to enjoy a pint of Real Ale with a pretty decent view.

Bag a table in what’s more of a backyard than a garden, or the first-floor balcony and terrace from where you’ll overlook the Thames.

On offer is classic British pub food including fish ‘n’ chips served with mushy peas, and bangers and mash.

FREE

THE BOUNDARY SHOREDITCH A tad more impressive than your average beer garden, this rooftop terrace affords drinkers striking views across the capital. Decorated like a work of art, the space boasts chic seating arranged around an open fireplace, and a 48-seat grill restaurant. If it’s nice, sit and relax with a glass of bubbly and watch the world go by below.

FREE

Late night: Fri & Sat til 12am 57 Wapping Wall, E1W 3SH Canada Water taylor-walker.co.uk

Open til Sun, 30 September, subject to weather conditions 2-4 Boundary Street, E2 7DD Shoreditch High Street theboundary.co.uk

IMBIBE SOUTHWARK

PUB ON THE PARK LONDON FIELDS

Tuck into a spit-roast or BBQ on Thursday and Friday nights, while relaxing in this flowerinfested garden. It’s newly refurbished, so expect a modern decor, with corner sofas, and a friendly vibe.

There is a decking area outside this Victorian pub, although, as it’s opposite a huge park, ask for your drink in a plastic cup, and head there.

Be warned: it does get incredibly busy in summer.

Late night: Fri til 1am 173 Blackfriars Road, SE1 8ER Southwark imbibe-bar.com

Late night: Fri & Sat til 1am 19 Martello Street, E8 3PE Bethnal Green pubonthepark.com

PROUD CAMDEN

WATER POET SPITALFIELDS

The former stables inside disguise the lush, fairy light-rimmed beer garden and terrace (above left) at the rear, on the banks of the famous Camden Lock. An outdoor bar in the corner means that a bevvie is never too far away, either. Free before 7pm.

This quirky garden is a little sun trap in the middle of the East End. It’s a traditional-looking boozer, with a covered marquee as well as benches sprawled across decking.

Munch on BBQ as well as hog roast – private hire and parties are catered for.

This newly opened pub (above) prides itself on its quality selection of ales, lagers, wines and cocktails, and fine grub. It’s outdoor section continues this intent to impress with a funky red, white and blue colour theme, and an array of tabels and booths. It’s a ‘local’ done with stylish passion. Summer has never felt so warm.

Late night: Mon-Sat til 11pm 9-11 Folgate Street, E1 6BX Shoreditch High Street waterpoet.co.uk

Late night: Fri-Sat til 12pm 121-123 Kew Road, TW9 2PN Richmond shaftesburyrichmond.co.uk

FREE

THE FALCON CLAPHAM NORTH You’ll feel like you’re on holiday drinking in this trendy pub’s funky backyard. There’s space for 300 revellers on the patio space, which boasts brightly coloured tables and chairs, and lots of plantlife offering a tropical feel. There’s an outdoor bar, so you don’t need to wander all the way inside for a top-up, and expect a BBQ as well as heated, covered areas should the heavens open.

FREE

FREE

Late night: Fri & Sat til 1am 33 Bedford Road, SW4 7SQ Clapham North thefalconclapham.co.uk

10

£8+

Late night: Thurs, Fri, Sat until 2am SW16 5NJ Chalk Farm proudcamden.com

FREE

THE SHAFTESBURY RICHMOND FREE

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R U O H Y P P A WEEK E H H T T G U N I Z OUGHO A R H T M S AUS DRINKS DEAL PL

Watch all the summer games at

King’s Cross

Brick Lane

Big screens, Great beer deals, terrace areas and DJ’s. www.bigchill.net

TNTMAGAZINE.COM

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Superstar Managers Wanted

CAREER OPPORTUNITIES IN HOSPITALITY

GOES TO COACHELLA Music, Art, Sunshine. We

Coachella

Renowned and established group THE MINT GROUP (Elk Bar, Bison and Bird, KOKO and more) is looking for superstar management applicants of all levels: AGM/DGM/GM. Successful applicants will be standards and quality driven, with forensic attention to detail, a fabulous first impression and a warm and approachable customer manner.

Front of house presence is essential, as is a big personality and buckets of charm. Proven experience working within a food & drink focused operation essential.

Well developed back of house knowledge is a must, along with the ability to lead, motivate and inspire a team, a keen interest in Business Development and a passion for the Hospitality world. P&L interest/knowledge expected as is historical input into marketing & promotional activity.

The perfect opportunity for experienced, enthusiastic, pro-active and hands-on individuals from either a bar or restaurant background.

LET CONTIKI TAKE YOU THERE‌ Over two weekends in April 2013, Palms Springs USA heats up with the hottest acts, arts and good times with the one and only Coachella Music & Arts Festival.

CV’s to go to jobs@mintgroup.co.uk

Whats included: F n " 7 $#12'4 * . 11 9 " '*7 20 ,1$#01 2- $#12'4 * F p ,'%&21 25',Q1& 0# &-2#* !!-++-" 2'-, F l ,'%&2 ', A o ,'%&21 ', *+ .0',%1 F 0# )$ 12 " '*7 9 m "',,#01 F 6.#0'#,!#" -30 , %#0 9 0'4#0 2# + F !'27 2-30

PRE- REGISTER YOUR INTEREST NOW!

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*Please note: This tour is not yet on sale. By pre-registering your interest, one of our expert Contiki Reservations team will contact you as soon as they are available.

New USA/Canada tours & dates out now!

START PLANNING!

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BRIXTON CLUBHOUSE BRIXTON This rooftop bar in south London has ace views of the city from its extensive terrace. When the sun’s out, so too is the BBQ, and there’s a Jacuzzi, as well as an outdoor bar. The real draw here, though, is the stunning sound system, which is put to use in the Art Deco club space below, and on the terraces upstairs for all-day summer weekend parties.

QUEEN ELIZABETH ROOF GARDEN SOUTHBANK

VARIOUS

Dates and times vary 467 Brixton Road, SW9 8HH Brixton brixtonclubhouse.com

There’s a real lawn, vegetable planters, and a ‘wildflower meadow’ – but then what else would you expect if your riverside cafe and bar was landcaped by the brains behind the Eden Project. A one-of-akind al fresco dining and drinking experience.

FREE

Late night: Daily til 10.30pm SE1 8XX Waterloo companyofcooks.com

THE EDINBORO CASTLE CAMDEN FREE

Not to be confused with the smaller Dublin Castle round the corner, this classy Camden boozing institution has a beer garden to die for. It features big sharing tables, private booths, a BBQ and hog roast, and an al fresco bar – so there’s no traipsing between garden and bar. Grab a brew and soak up that sun.

Late night: Mon-Sun, til 11pm. Sun, til 10.30pm 57 Mornington Crescent, NW1 7RU Camden Town edinborocastlepub.co.uk

THE CRABTREE HAMMERSMITH

THE SWAN CHISWICK

This iconic Victorian pub on the banks of the Thames has a beer garden with riverside views. nicely kitted out with flora and fauna, and a BBQ till 9pm, it’s a truly delightful venue to enjoy a bevvy.

An impressive menu is waiting, as is a wide choice of wines, lagers and ales. Best of all, though, is the leafy beer garden in which to enjoy one – or more – of the above.

Sumptuous and stylish.

Late night: Mon-Sat til 11pm W6 9HA Baron’s Court thecrabtreew6.co.uk

Late night: Fri & Sat til 10.30pm 1 Evershed Walk, W4 5HH South Acton theswanchiswick.co.uk

THE GREYHOUND STREATHAM

VIBE BAR BRICK LANE

This large pub on the edge of Streatham Common, has a beer garden that almost matches the park for scale.

With a decking area, two pizzas and a bottle of wine for £20, it’s too little known by half.

Always rammed in summer, this venue boasts outside space with bench-style seating, and top DJs performing. It’s also big on food – choose from jerk chicken and BBQ, homemade pizza, and bar snacks, such as spring rolls.

Furnished with comfy-as sofas, leafy hanging baskets, and fairy lights and, because this is London after all, it’s fully heated, too. It’s Chelsea, so expect the drinks to match this set-to-impress exterior.

Late night: Mon-Fri til 12am SW16 5NJ Streatham Common thegreyhoundbar.co.uk

Late night: Fri & Sat 91-95 Brick Lane, E1 6QL Shoreditch High Street vibe-bar.co.uk

Daily til 11pm 9 Phene Street, SW3 5NY Sloane Square thephene.com

FREE

HAWLEY ARMS CAMDEN Having been damaged by fire in 2008, the pub refurbished, aiming to recreate the homefrom-home atmosphere for which it was revered.

Outside, drinkers will find a small walled garden at the back, as well as a first-floor bar with a terrace. Put some tunes on the jukebox, play board games, or soak up the busy vibe. Hungry? Order a Pieminister Pie for £8.50.

FREE

FREE

Late night: Fri & Sat til 1am 2 Castlehaven Road, NW1 8QU Camden Town thehawleyarms.co.uk

FREE

THE COCK TAVERN FULHAM Recently reopened and fully refurbished, this stylish yet homely west London pub (above) has a decked out terrace garden from which to enjoy its ales, lagers and cocktails, and an ace Sunday roast, too.

FREE

Late night: Fri & Sat til 12.30am 360 North End Road, SW6 1LY Fulham Broadway cocktavern.coo.uk

THE PHENE CHELSEA

FREE

FREE

TNTMAGAZINE.COM

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MYLONDON

London’s best-kept secret is Crouch End. I’ve lived there since 1999 and it’s the most homely place I’ve found in London, inhabited by very artistic people.

It’s like being in a village, and there are spontaneous barbeques aplenty. I go to Sable D’or for an americano, or carrot and apple juice, and the DJ Andy Kershaw owns a great place called Banners, which is a South American diner.

When I want to chill out I sit in front of the TV with a great movie, a Japenese takeaway from WOW in Crouch End, a bottle of wine and a duvet.

The most interesting person I’ve met is my Dad. He’s hilarious, quickwitted, and will have you on your knees howling. He inspired me to do what I do. He studied medicine, but then went into business – but he’s always quite spontaneous. Its just a game, he says, have fun.

9 DAY Egypt Express

10 DAY Spirit of Egypt

Dep. 7 & 14 Jun 2012

Dep. 24 Jun 2012

WAS £290

WAS £600 NOW

What baffles me about London is why everyone looks so miserable on the Tube everyday. Why aren’t they jumping for joy for living in a great city?

£270

Includes US$135 local payment

£585

Includes US$270 local payment

15 DAY Pyramids & Beaches

UP TO

15%

Dep. 7 Jul 2012

WAS £460

OFF

NOW

SINGER-SONGWRITER

NOW

HELEN BOULDING

EGYPT & MIDDLE EAST £425

Includes US$190 local payment

My favourite place for a drink is the King’s Head in Crouch End, where all the musos go and hang out. I’ve seen some ace bands, such as Snow Patrol, play private gigs in the basement.

For when you’re hungover in London munch on a big fat juicy cheeseburger from Monkeynuts, in Crouch End, accompanied by a Bloody Mary.

What gets me up in the morning? My little boy, I have no choice.

XXXXXXX /00 XXXXXXXXXXX /00

My perfect weekend is spent spending quality time with my family, relaxing, and tucking into my mum’s Sunday roast.

NER WIN vourite

The last naughty thing I did was get pregnant.

The biggest faux pas I’ve ever made was, when once talking to a friend about someone we both know who wasn’t invited to his half-sister’s funeral (due to some family issue). I came out with ‘I can’t believe she didn’t invite her own brother to her funeral’. My friend then said to me, ‘Helen, she didn’t invite anyone to her funeral, she was dead’. I felt terrible and stupid.

UK Golden Backpack

Fa M iddle East Operator As voted by you!

www.topdeck.travel/egypt/tnt

Five words that sum up London ... exciting, busy, fun, home, tiring L8291 / Y2992

Call 0845 257 5211

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*Terms & Conditions apply. Flights not included. Egypt trip price includes local payment based on $1 = £0.646677, which must be paid locally in USD. Exchange rates correct at time of printing, and subject to currency fluctuations, depending when payment is made. Discount taken from the trip price and doesn’t include local payments. Subject to availability.

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LONDONDRINKS

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LOST ANGEL

@tntmagazine

Lost Angel will put you on cloud nine

BAR THE SCENE When creating a pleasing cocktail, a bartender must strike a balance between the holy trinity – the sweet, the sour and the spirit. None should be dominant, instead all three mixed to form a smooth blend. It’s a delicate art and one easier said than done. However, those serving at Lost Angel know exactly how to spark the senses, creating the most well-balanced creations enjoyed by TNT for some time. The bar itself is decked out with a 19th-century gin palace in mind. Stuffed animals, trombone lightshades and a pic of her Maj in her younger days, sceptre and crown glowing out of the soft low lighting, add a surreal element. Warm vibrations emanate from the sound system and the establishment’s comfortable leather seating is continued in the garden bar, where DJs entertain until 2am at the weekend. It’s a discerning yet unpretentious drinking experience.

THE GRUB The adjacent restaurant, The Gaslight Grill, serves contemporary British cuisine, but the Lost Angel’s bar menu offers quality grazing, such as cured meats, stuffed mushrooms and rump steak. The ample Sunday roasts are becoming legend.

BEHIND THE BAR Full range of beer – ales and draughts, with seasonal guests appearing – an enticing choice of cocktails and a well-put-together wine list.

BILL PLEASE Beer from £3.80; wine from £3.70 a glass; cocktails from £7.50.

VERDICT Getting lost has never been such an inviting proposition. JAHN VANNISSELROY

339 Battersea Park, SW11 4WS

lostangel.co.uk

Clapham Junction

HARVEY NICHOLS 5TH FLOOR BAR

3 OF THE BEST SKINNY COCKTAILS

16

The antioxidant-rich Matchito uses superfood-ofthe-moment matcha green tea powder, plus gin, apple, lime and mint for virtuous drinking. £11.95. harveynichols.com

DIRTY MARTINI

OSKAR’S BAR

A summer refersher that leaps out of a menu bursting with sin-free cocktails, the Skinny Passion Fruit Mojito is just 107 calories, so you can slip into your party dress sooner. £9

Skinny sippers can imbibe this Martin Miller’s G & Tea guilt-free all night long. It’s low G.I due to agave syrup instead of sugar, and it’s only got 120 cal. Best go back for another, then. £8.50.

dirtymartini.uk.com

dabbous.co.uk

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BITE SIZE ABSOLUT TOP NEW LOOK Absolut has teamed up with the Gorillaz’s Jamie Hewlett to create funky designs for its vodka. The limited-edition looks use characters representing London’s style and fashion pioneers over the past 200 years – from 18th-century Dandies, to Sixties chicks, designs take in every era.

A keepsake – after you’ve drunk the booze, of course. Priced at £17.89 at supermarkets. absolut.com/uk

COOKING UP A STORM Any chef will tell you cooking is more enjoyable with a drink in hand. That’s why swanky Soho bar Carom ensures guests at its new monthly curry masterclasses are always topped up.

Sip on cocktails as you take tips from executive chef Balaji Balachander on how to whip up a delicious, easy-tofollow dish. The evening includes a kitchen tour (check out the coal oven) and concludes with a three-course meal. It costs £35. caromsoho.com

CALLING WINE LOVERS! Tickle your tastebuds by trying Portuguese wines at a special tasting event. Fifty choices will be on offer – and the £10 ticket includes samples as well as Portuguese food. If you always opt for the same bottle with dinner, this will be an ideal chance to improve your knowledge. It takes place on Friday, June 15 at the Weston Roof Pavilion at the Southbank Centre.

Brixton’s new ‘speakeasy’

MARKET HOUSE BRITISH THE SCENE The building was constructed more than 100 years ago by the Truman Brewery and has, in recent years, been many things, including a pub, a butcher and a fishmongers, before opening last month as the Market House. Recycling and replenishable is the order of the day, so while the building’s original facade has been restored, much of the decor, finishings and furnishings have a vintage feel, too. Cosy, unpretentious and aiming for ‘speakeasy’ charm, it has a short terrace with seating outside, perfect for muggy summer evenings. There’s music at the weekends from DJs and live acts, featuring leftfield reggae, funk, blues, and the odd disco tune.

THE GRUB If the decor has been reclaimed, the food too continues this eco-aim, with much of the meat sourced from organic suppliers, the fish sustainably sourced, and the veggies drawn, in large part, from local, independent traders. The Market House Burger is organic Hereford beef (it’s thick and tasty) and The Ultimate Club Sandwich boats free-range chicken with organic parmesan (it’s a less belly-filling option to the burger, but equally enjoyable). There are also the traditional fish and chips, a roast veg and goat’s cheese tart and a ‘Seriously Good’ steak sandwich, to boot. There are Mediterranean options on the menu, too, including Greek Spanakopita – it’s a light filo pastry, stuffed with ricotta cheese and spinach served with a tzatziki yoghurt dip, although this proved a tad too greasy for our tastes.

A pub staple assortment of wines, lagers and ales, with organic beers from independent suppliers. Happy hour runs from 5pm-8pm everyday.

BILL PLEASE Mains from £7.50; Sunday roasts from £10.50; beers from £3.50; wine by the glass frmo £3.80; beer and burger combos from £8.95.

VERDICT The laidback atmosphere is matched by decent grub and a prime location for watching the world go by – it’s ace for lazy weekend afternoons and chilledout evenings soaking up some leftfield musical entertainment. ALASDAIR MORTON BEHIND THE BAR

cubecom.co.uk/50greats 433 Coldharbour Lane, SW9 8LN

market-house.co.uk

Brixton

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@TNT GET IT OFF YOUR TEXT

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LETTER OF THE WEEK

Huge crowds march down the Mall

Text TNT and your message to

81707*

A guy tried robbing me at knife point, luckily I managed to disarm him.

Fool didn’t notice I’d just bought a chainsaw

Justin I just knew I was going to get thrown out of the optimism society

Davey I recently split up with my girlfriend after she got a job as a roofer.

She’s just become so high maintenance

Aldous The Queen has taken to the job like she was born to do it

Henry My favourite pet rabbit, Gotye, passed away the other day. Now he’s just some bunny that I used to know

Robin I used to follow my dreams, but they all got restraining orders

Lucianda My mate told me that Apparently there’s a big Eighties ska revival happening. I said: ‘That’s just Madness’

Pita Haven’t seen David Blaine in ages. I’d say it’s his best trick ever

Siobhan McDonald’s being the official restaurant of the GAmes is like smoking being the official medicine of cancer

Crystal

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I moved here from South Africa three weeks ago and happened to land right in the middle of all the Jubilee celebrations.

What I loved is it not only united the nation, but the world, too. The Queen is truly an icon for goodwill and peace. In this violent day and age, an event like the Jubilee is important as it reminds us all of how much has been accomplished. As a British citizen, I’m proud to have Her Majesty as our head of state!

Zoe Van Schoor, via email

CANADIAN CORNER On P3 of your 1500th issue (congrats!), you say our “favourite magazine was launched in 1983 as the bible for Australians and Kiwis living in London”.

Flip to P69 and read the proud words on the cover of the very first TNT: “News & sport from home for all our Australian, American, Canadian and New Zealand Visitors.” When did it become OK to lose the Canadians? Maybe we’re not as brash as the other lot, but we’re a proud part of Britain’s backpacking community!

Nicolas Toth, via email Great to see our Canadian readership is alive and kicking! Apologies for missing you out. To make up for it, here’s your own Canadian Corner. Ed

FACE OFF Re: Man’s face eaten in zombie attack (tntmagazine.com): After getting my face eaten off, I wouldn’t want anyone

trying to keep me alive.

I’d still be homeless, and now blind and in shitty condition for the rest of my days. This story makes me not want to live on this planet anymore.

Jen, via tntmagazine.com

PUFF, PUFF? PASS Barack Obama is not cool at all. Escalating the war on medicinal marijuana users, while at the same time having been a massive toker in his younger days?

An absolute disgrace.

Rob, via tntmagazine.com

Zoe wins a three-day tour of Ireland courtesy of Shamrocker shamrockeradventures.com

YOUR TWEETS Tweet us @tntmagazine @yoyoha: If you buy organic and don’t tell someone about it, is it still organic? @Rorynotroy: If I ever describe anything you tell me as “crazy,” it’s really not, I just want out of your conversation prison @mikedecenzo: Instead of yelling, I just say “Caps Lock” and then speak at a normal volume

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ISLAND TIME I would love to take the Jamaica tour (Top 5, TNT 1500). Bob Marley is a legend that deserves respect, even from those who don’t like his music.

Jamaica is a real paradise that I have to visit one day.

Jugoslav, via tntmagazine.com SINGAPORE /76 SALVADOR /78

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Michelle Collett: The Beefeater hats are made from bear skins.

Stella McCartney designed the same hat but without the need to slaughter bears. They refused.

Marco Cassuto: Good night at the TNT 1500 party. Felt it this morning. Let me know if you’ve got any more events in the pipeline Dave Sanderson: Aussies boozing is a rite (sic) of passage. As you get older you get more tolerant.

Live and let live.

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ARE YOU SPOTTED IN THE CIRCLE?

WIN

Email us at marketing@ tntmagazine.com with ‘Spotted’ in the subject line, email must include a photo of yourself!

You’ve Won a 13 week UK subscription to TNT Magazine!

SPOTTED AT TNT’S 1500 PARTY Aquum, Clapham North Friday, June 1, 2012 Photos by: Brandt Hurley / TNT Images

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LONDONSOUND

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Band of brothers Kora bring it to Homelanz

festival

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STRUMMER OF LOVE

HOMELANZ Boston Manor Park, TW8 9JX SAT, JUNE 16 | DOORS AT 11AM | £35

Glastonbury head Michael Eavis has thrown his hat into the ring and endorsed this three-day event celebrating the late Clash frontman Joe Strummer (a Glasto regular in his latter days). For this 10-year anniversary fest, there’ll be the likes of The Pogues, Badly Drawn Boy, Roots Manuva, recent Wembley champ Frank Turner (left) and Billy Bragg toasting their friend and raising money for charity. There’ll be a Strummer campfire burning all weekend, too.

Aug 17-19. Somerset TBC. £175 Taunton strummeroflove.com

FINAL 1502 Lon Sound.indd 22

A little taste of back home in your current home, Homelanz brings together a who’s who of southern hemisphere talent, entertainment and cuisine across two stages, tents and stalls at this one-day fest.

South Africa’s Prime Circle (interview P??) headline the show, bringing tracks from their 10-year-strong career, especially dipping into last year’s critically and commercially adored long player Jekyll & Hyde. With a fifth album ‘under construction’, this could be the show at which they’ll try out a few new tracks, too.

New Zealand’s band of brothers, Kora (above) bring their rock-reggae-funkroots-multi-genre’d tunes to the show as well, with Aussie singer-songwriter/ chart-smasher Alex Lloyd set to perform best-selling hits such as Amazing and newer cuts from latest album Good In The Face Of A Stranger.

In a day jam-packed full of top music, there’s the likes of Anna Coddington, pop-infused singer Bowie Jane, indie-styled songwriter Glenn Aitken, solo artist Jayson Norris and sax-metal indie rock from Melic, too – not to mention DJs in the silent disco to make sure that the party never misses a beat.

There’s a host of other entertainment on offer, with top-notch food and wine in abundance. And if you have any questions on how to get a job in the UK, where to go to on your travels while your over here, and how best to do it, drop by The Village, where travellers, expats and industry professionals will be on hand to answer all of your questions. Only thing they can’t guarantee is the weather!

Boston Manor

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NEW BAND

CHRIS CORNELL GIG MON, JUNE 18. 7PM £27.50

The Soundgarden singer with the epic vocals and equally epic hair, back with his old band for some headline gigs in Hyde Park, strikes out on his own for this acoustic theatre show.

Expect him to draw from his extensive solo back catalogue, including last year’s Songbook and his ace debut Euphoria Morning.

Photos: Herald on Sunday; Getty.

London Palladium Argyll Street, W1F 7TF Oxford Circus reallyuseful.com

SOULBREW KARAOKE

OVUM

CLUB

CLUB

THURS, JUNE 14. 11PM-3AM £5

SAT, JUNE 16. 10PM-6AM £10+

Are you a karaoke fan but not as enamoured with the selection of cheesy 80s ballads on offer, with your vocals reverbed out of existence by the tacky karaoke-machine? Get down to this new weekly night where you can tackle the best soul, hip hop and R&B with a full five-piece live band.

Top stuff! Take that Belinda Carlisle!

House and techno specialists Ovum Recordings are in town for their first bash since early 2010. Ovum main man Josh Wink, who has spearheaded the label’s exploits over the past 15 years, headlines himself, along with hand-picked support from Loco Dice’s production partner Martin Buttrich and label mate Gregor Fisher.

Madame JoJos 8-10 Brewer Street, W1F 0SE Tottenham Court Road soulbrew.com

Electric Brixton Town Hall Parade, SW2 1RJ Brixton electricbrixton.co.uk

LOVEBOX

SOUNDS OF AFRICA

HOT CHIP

GIG

CLUB

GIG

JUNE 15-17. 12PM-11PM £29+

SAT, JUNE 16. 10.30PM-6AM £25+

WED, JUNE 13. 7.30PM £20

Celebrating its tenth year with a party line-up to die for: Hot Chip, Friendly Fires and Grace Jones are the headliners, with the likes of Crystal Castles, Magnetic Man, Sub Focus (live) Emeli Sandé, Maverick Sabre, Lana Del Ray, Chaka Khan, and much more. Put on your party hat, grab your dancing shoes, and get amongst it!

Tonnes of artists come together across three stages featuring the very finest stars from southern Africa, with bands, DJs, comedy and zulu dancers and everything from rock and pop to techno, trance and house. Electronic duo Goldfish (above), SA singer songwriter Jesse Clegg and DJ Kent & Derek the Bandit headline.

The disco-popsters, who throw in elements of house, indie, electronica and geek chic, hit this intimate venue for a warm-up show ahead of their Lovebox-ing at the weekend. Drawing from latest album In Our Heads, and dancefloor firecrackers such as Ready For The Floor and Over And Over, this is one not to miss.

Victoria Park Victoria Park Road, E9 7BT Mile End lovebox.net

Coronet Theatre 28 New Kent Road, SE1 6TJ Elephant & Castle soundsofafrica.co.uk

Heaven Under The Arches, WC2N 6NG Embankment heaven-live.co.uk

BONJAH THE BUZZ SO FAR Rootsy indie folk with a rock twist and Glenn Mossop’s yearning vocals, BONJAH have played Big Day Out, shifted 20,000 CDs back home in Aus and NZ without any major label backing, and are over here to play their first shows in Her Majesty’s homeland.

Their sophomore record Go Go Chaos was a hit last year, and they’ll be entering the studio soon to cement their ever-growing status with a third. Destined for big things.

THE CRITICS SAY “The makings to be one of the next big Australian bands.” Tone Deaf THE PLUG Nambucca 596 Holloway Road, N7 6LB Upper Holloway, June 15, £6 nambuccalondon.com Underbelly 11 Hoxton Square, N1 6NU Old Street, June 16, £6 underbellyhoxton.com

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CLUBLISTINGS

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MONDAY 11 I Love Mondays DJ Victor spins dance, disco, pop, garage, R‘n’B and funky house. Moonlighting, Greek St, W1D 4DR (020 7437 5782/ cc 020 7287 3727). 10pm-3.30am. £5, w/flyer £3, NUS £1.50.

Eclectic Fridays Resident DJs play hip-hop, soul and house.

Gigalum, Cavendish Parade, Clapham Common South Side, SW4 9DW (020 8772 0303). 7pm-late. Free.

BOOK NOW!

Fabriclive Caspa, Emalkay, Matty G, The Others, D1, Orien, Rod Azlan, G Double, DJ Hype, Dillinja, Sigma, Bailey, Skeptical, Emperor, GQ, IC3 and Justyce spin house, techno and electro. Fabric, Charterhouse St, EC1M 6HJ (020 7336 8898). 10pm-6am. £18, adv £17, £7 after 3am, NUS £10 before midnight, mems £13.

The Jump Off DJ Manny Norte plays hip-hop, garage and R‘n’B, with hosts Rap 6 and Charlie Sloth. The Scala, Pentonville Rd, N1 9NL (020 7833 2022/ cc 0844 477 1000). 8pm-2am. £12, £10 before 9pm, adv £8.

Popcorn Resident DJs play dance, electro, R‘n’B, pop and hip-hop. Heaven, Charing Cross Arches, Villiers St, WC2N 6NG (020 7930 2020). 11pm-5.30am. £8.

Rehab DJ Haley, Zoe Demonette, Dan Udy and Malarky supply indie, electro and pop. The Roxy, Rathbone Place, W1T 1HJ (020 7255 1098). 10pm-3am. £5, NUS/ w/flyer £3, mems £1 before 9.30pm.

Re-Quest DJ Master Level plays funk, soul, hip-hop, house and reggae. Mother Bar, Old St, EC1V 9LE (020 7739 5949). 8pm-3am. Free.

Service Industry Night Colin Russell and Donald Sweeneey provide R‘n’B, hip-hop and chart. Rumba, Shaftesbury Ave, W1D 7EP (020 7287 2715).

9pm-3am. £7, £5 before midnight, w/payslip free before midnight.

Stampede DJ Laurence Rene spins pop-punk, alternative, rock and ska, with hosts Oli Sandler and Matt Boland. Escape Bar, Brewer St, W1F 0SU (020 7734 3040).

9pm-3am. £5, £1 before 11pm, free before 10pm, NUS £3.

TUESDAY 12 Balearic Deep, vocal, and Balearic house courtesy of Amir Groove and Nick Tcherniak.

The Shadow Lounge, Brewer St, W1F 0RF (020 7287 7988).

10pm-3am. £5, guestlist free.

The Boom Boom Room Funk, Baile funk, house, urban Latin, reggaeton and pop courtesy of DJ Carioca, DJ Bruno, DJ Bebeto, DJ Rafael and DJ Thallom, plus live music from Rosanna Band, Wesley Band and Gender Band.

Salsa!, Charing Cross Rd, WC2H 0JG (020 7379 3277). Phone for times. £5.

Stupid Tuesday Resident DJs supply funky house, disco and pop. Thirst, Greek St, W1D 3DR (020 7437 1977).

5pm-3am. £3, free before 10pm.

Student Night! DJ Deano spins dance, hip-hop, pop and R‘n’B. Walkabout, Finchley Rd, Finchley Rd, NW3 6LU (020 433 6570).

8.30pm-midnight. Free.

Tuesday Night Inn Resident DJs spin folk and soul music, plus ping pong, table football and computer games. The Queen Of Hoxton, Curtain Rd, EC2A 3JX (020 7422 0958). 5pm-midnight. Free.

White Heat DJs Matty, Olly and Marcus provide electro, techno and indie. Madame Jojo’s, Brewer St, W1F 0SE (020 7734 3040).

10.30pm-3am. £5, concs/flyer £4.

24

CREAMFIELDS Daresbury Estate. Aug 24-26. £130 David Guetta, Skrillex, Major Lazer, Deadmau5, Calvin Harris (above) and Tiesto are just some of the highlights at this three-day dance fest.

WA4 4AR

Runcorn

creamfields.com

WEDNESDAY 13 Cheapskates Old school hip-hop, electro and disco courtesy of DJ Downfall.

Moonlighting, Greek St, W1D 4DR (020 7437 5782/ cc 020 7287 3727). 9pm-3.30am. £6.50, NUS £5.50, w/flyer £4.50.

Choke Resident DJs play hip-hop, drum ‘n’ bass, electro, indie and grime.

The Roxy, Rathbone Place, W1T 1HJ (020 7255 1098). 10pm-3am. £5, NUS/w/flyer £4, guestlist £3.

Clubbing London & Max Parties Resident DJs supply house and electro. The Den & Centro, West Central St, WC1A 1JJ (020 7240 1083). midnight-6am. £10.

Dance Nights Princess Karina and DJ Gary Baldi spin dance hits. EC3 Live, Crosswall, EC3N 2JY (020 7488 1766). 11.30pm-3am. £10.

Madd Raff Wednesdays The Heatwave supply bashment and dancehall, plus a dance session with dancehall instructor Safwaan Shoshoni of Pineapple Studios. The Social, Little Portland St, W1W 7JD (020 7636 4992). 7pm-1am. £5, £3 before 11pm, free before 9pm.

Metrolatina Resident DJs mix jazzy salsa with Cuban sounds. Salsa!, Charing Cross Rd, WC2H 0JG (020 7379 3277).

9.30pm-2am. £4, free before 9pm.

THURSDAY 14 Bad Sex Phaze One, Mayton DJs, Fin Munro, The Penelopes and Toy Soldier spin indie, rock and disco, plus burlesque and cabaret performances. Proud Camden, The Horse Hospital, Chalk Farm Rd, NW1 8AH (020 7482 3867).

7.30pm-2.30am. £7, £5 before 10pm, NUS/guestlist £5, NUS/ guestlist free before 10pm.

Cheezy Thursdays DJs Watty Jnr, Real People, Jazzy G, Doctor B and Sir Lloyd spin pop, retro, rock ‘n’ roll and dance hits. Porky’s Wine Bar, Sternhold Ave, SW2 4PA (020 8671 3424).

9pm-2am. £5, free before midnight.

Gravity DJs Alan K and Fat Tony spin electro, house and disco, with hosts Mauricio and Danny Boyce. Fire, South Lambeth Rd, SW8 1UQ (020 7582 9890).

2pm-late. £10, concs £5.

It’s Your Birthday Pop, disco, rock ‘n’ roll, electro and hip-hop.

The Hoxton Pony, Curtain Rd, EC2A 3AH (020 7613 2844). 8pm-1am. £7, £5 before 10pm, concs £3.

QueerlyOut DJ Robby D spins dance, pop and R‘n’B. Escape Bar, Brewer St, W1F 0SU (020 7734 3040).

9pm-3am. £5, £3, free before 9pm.

Radio The Radio DJs supply 1980s pop, indie and disco.

The Roxy, Rathbone Place, W1T 1HJ (020 7255 1098). 10pm-3am. £5, NUS/w/flyer £3, free before 9pm.

Roller Disco Funk and disco for a wheeled audience.

Renaissance Rooms, opposite Arch 8, Arches, Miles St, SW8 1RZ (0844 736 5375). 8pm-midnight. £10 inc skates, NUS £6 inc skates, w/own skates £7.50, Sounds Of The Underground DJs Pioneer, Naughty, MA1, Twista, Weighty J and guests supply hip-hop, funk and electronica. East Village, Great Eastern St, EC2A 3HX (020 7739 5173). 9pm-3am. £5, free before midnight.

FRIDAY 15 Abstract James McLaughin, Sergio Gomez and Femi B spin house and electro in the main room, with The Allstars featuring Joe Berry and Joe Ryan in the Global room. Pacha, Terminus Place, SW1V 1JR (0845 371 4489).

11pm-6am. £15, adv £10.

Chew The Fat Killsonik, Bare Noize featuring Stig Of The Dump, Reso, Document One, Marco Del Horno, Statix, Hostage, Lee Mortimer, Warrior One, Lakosa, Tripper and residents spin drum ‘n’ bass, electro and dubstep across two rooms.

Cable, Bermondsey St, SE1 2EG (020 7403 7730). 11pm-6am. £10, adv £7, £5 before midnight.

The Gallery Hernan Cattaneo, Guy Mantzur, Riley & Durrant, Gareth Cooke, Graeme Lloyd, Max Corderoy, Karma and Fly Or Die spin electro and trance. The Ministry Of Sound, Gaunt St, SE1 6DP (0870 060 0010).

10.30pm-6am. £14, mems £11.

LDN DC Presents Ikonika (DJ set) and Optimum spin dubstep, house, trance and techno. The Rhythm Factory, Whitechapel Rd, E1 1EW (020 7375 3774). 10pm-6am. £5.

A Lovebox Afterparty: From A Paradise Called Lisbon Magazino, Jose Belo, Ze Salvador, Altino, Gabbi Lopez, Alex Vieira, Mauro Ferno, Mestivan, Taelimb, Rebs, Conscience, Illistrate, Medica, Cymatik, Strago, Bossmanchief, Sweetpea, Cid Poitier and Lokdon spin house, techno and electro across three rooms. Egg, York Way, N7 9AX (020 7871 7111). 11pm-7am. mems £13-£15, adv/NUS £10.

Lovebox Festival Official Afterparty Zinc, Disclosure, Baio, Greco-Roman Soundsystem, Martelo, Monki, Moxie and Klose One spin dubstep, electro and house. XOYO, Cowper St, EC2A 4AP (020 7729 5959). 9pm-late. £11.

Onyx Lee Harris, Phil Marriott, JC Christopher and DouG’uim, Hoxton Whores, Soul Avengerz, Mikey D, Sharp Boys, Pagano, Tasty Tim, Jason Prince, James St James, Lady Lloyd, Dusty O, Ariel and Lisa German spin house, electro and techno. Fire, South Lambeth Rd, SW8 1UQ (020 7582 9890). 11pm-5am. w/flyer £6, free before midnight.

Vegaboundz DJs Pharoahe Monch, True Tiger with D Double E and guests supply hip-hop and dub.

Proud 2, Peninsula Sq, SE10 0DX (020 8463 3070). 10pm-6am. £8-£15.

SATURDAY 16 Bootylicious DJs Jeffrey Hinton and Kartel Brown spin R‘n’B, hip-hop and dancehall in the main room, while DJs Tyron, Biggy C and Sugarbear play house in the Red Room. Club Colosseum, Nine Elms Ln, SW8 5NQ (020 7720 3609).

11.30pm-6am. £13, £10 before midnight, NUS £7, NUS/mems £6 before midnight, mems £8 before 1am.

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Fabric Derrick Carter, Nick Curly, Terry Francis and Luke Slater spin house and techno, plus The Advent and Makam perform live.

Fabric, Charterhouse St, EC1M 6HJ (020 7336 8898). 11pm-8am. £19, adv £18, NUS £12, mems £13.

Lovebox Festival After Party Dixon, Damian Lazarus, Miguel Campbell, Gerd Janson, Jack Savidge, Edwin Congreave, Crazy P Soundsystem, Delice Dephunk and Tim Sweeney spin house, electro, techno. The Ministry Of Sound, Gaunt St, SE1 6DP (0870 060 0010). 11pm-7am. £15.

Shake Disco and pop from DJ John Osbourne and Paul C in the main room, while DJ Milo plays party anthems in room two. Electric Ballroom, Camden High St, NW1 8QP (020 7485 9006). 10pm-3am. £10, NUS/mems £8 before 11.30pm.

Shogun Audio Friction, Shy FX, Icicle, Rockwell, Alix Perez, Spectrasoul, Technicolour, Komatic, RackNRuin, Dr S Gachet and Liquid Gold spin drum ‘n’ bass, dub and electro, plus MCs GQ, Stamina, Mantmast and LX One. Cable, Bermondsey St, SE1 2EG (020 7403 7730).

10pm-6am. £15, adv £13 & £14.

Sounds Of Africa DJ Kent spins African vibes and world music, with Goldfish and Jesse Clegg performing live. The Coronet, New Kent Rd, SE1 6TJ (020 7701 1500).

10pm-6am. Adv £20 & £30.

Space: The Summer Sessions Kinkyfunk DJs and Twisted Plastic DJs provide house and electro across two rooms. Pacha, Terminus Place, SW1V 1JR (0845 371 4489).

11pm-6am. £20, adv £15.

Techno Fest: Tronic Showcase Christian Smith and Bart Skils spin house and techno. Egg, York Way, N7 9AX (020 7871 7111).

10pm-late. £15, adv £10.

Viet Party DJs Red & Blue, T-One, Phuong Pharreal, D-Viant and Dr Grey spin R‘n’B and Latin beats.

Club Colosseum, Nine Elms Ln, SW8 5NQ (020 7720 3609). 11pm-6am. £20.

SUNDAY 17 Beyond Afterhours DJs Steve Pitron, Mikey D, Alan K, Sharp Boys, Gonzalo Rivas, Paul Heron, HiFi Sean, Paul Christian, Ariel and Fat Tony spin house, electro and techno across three floors.

Fire, South Lambeth Rd, SW8 1UQ (020 7582 9890). 6pm-1am. Adv £12.

Hula Boogie Miss Aloha and the Reverend Boogie spin tunes from the 1930s to the 1950s. South London Pacific, Kennington Rd, SE11 4LD (020 7820 9189). 7pm-1am. £7.

Chockablock Vs House-Bound DJs T2, Mark Radford and guests spin hip-hop, house and retro beats.

The Rhythm Factory, Whitechapel Rd, E1 1EW (020 7375 3774).

10pm-6am. £10 before midnight.

LDV Touch DJs Garth Hill, Dan C, Neil Bowles, Balistrari and Bongo Beatz spin electro and house.

Gigalum, Cavendish Parade, Clapham Common South Side, SW4 9DW (020 8772 0303). 4pm-11pm. Free.

Dirty Dubbin Official Pre-Party Derek The Bandit and Pre-party DJs spin rock, pop and indie.

Gigalum, Cavendish Parade, Clapham Common South Side, SW4 9DW (020 8772 0303). 8pm-late. Free.

WetYourSelf! DJs Dexter Kane, Cormac, Jacob Husley and Peter Pixzel spin techno and house. Fabric, Charterhouse St, EC1M 6HJ (020 7336 8898).

11pm-6am. £10, NUS £7, adv £5.

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FINAL 1502 Club Listings.indd 24

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MONDAY 11 Mike Doughty, John Wheeler, Mike Viola Indie-rock and Americana by the US-based singer-songwriter.

The Borderline, Orange Yard, Manette St, W1D 4JB (0870 060 3777/ cc 0871 231 0842). £11.

Howlin Circus, Izo FitzRoy And The Royal Bastards, The Vanderbilts, The Band From Oddworld Blues-rock by the London-based band. Dublin Castle, Parkway, NW1 7AN (020 8806 2668). £7, concs £5.

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Kayhan Kalhor And Erdal Erzincan The fiddler and lutenist perform Classical Persian and Turkish pieces. Barbican Centre, Silk St, EC2Y 8DS (020 7638 8891/ cc 020 7638 8891). £22-£35.

The Gaslight Anthem The New Jersey-based four-piece plays punk-rock in support of its album Handwritten. Koko, Camden High St, NW1 7JE (0870 432 5527). £20.25.

Rajiv, Mikey Ball, Kit Rice, Steptoe, Zaid Joseph, Ray Eves Pop and R‘n’B by the London-based singersongwriter. Proud Camden, The Horse Hospital, Chalk Farm Rd, NW1 8AH (020 7482 3867). Free.

Saint Vitus, Acid King, Sardonis The veteran American band performs doom metal from the album Lillie: F-65. The Underworld, Camden High St, NW1 0NE (020 7482 1932). £16.

The Swingle Singers The eightpiece a cappella and vocal harmony group performs classical, Latin, jazz, rock and pop. Pizza Express Jazz Club, Dean St, W1D 3RW (020 7437 9595/ cc 0845 602 7017). Also Tue. £25.

Usher The chart-topping, multi-platinum American singer performs R ‘n’ B and pop from the album Looking 4 Myself.

HMV Apollo, Queen Caroline St, W6 9QH (0843 221 0100). £55 & £65.

TUESDAY 12 Nell Bryden, Murray James The American singer-songwriter performs country and folk. The Borderline, Orange Yard, Manette St, W1D 4JB (0870 060 3777/ cc 0871 231 0842). £7.

Alex Clare Soul and dance from the London-born vocalist. The Scala, Pentonville Rd, N1 9NL (020 7833 2022/ cc 0844 477 1000). Adv £15.

Jipsy, Yo Zushi, Leyli, Avert Francis London-based rock band. Bull And Gate, Kentish Town Rd, NW5 2TJ (020 7704 0187). £6, adv/w/flyer £5.

Liars The outfit performs experimental rock and postpunk. XOYO, Cowper St, EC2A 4AP (020 7729 5959). £12.50.

Megadeth The veteran Californian band led by singer and guitarist Dave Mustaine plays heavy thrash metal from the album Th1rt3en.

Electric Ballroom, Camden High St, NW1 8QP (020 7485 9006). £35.

Anais Mitchell & The Young Man Band Country and folk from the American singer and fellow band members. Dingwalls, Camden Lock, Chalk Farm Rd, NW1 8AB (020 7428 0010/ cc 020 7428 5929). £13.50.

Northumbrian Voices Musicians and singers bring to life the historic narratives and sounds of Northumbria through songs and stories. Featuring Kathryn Tickell, Mike Tickell, Kit Haigh, Julian Sutton, Hannah Rickard and Patsy Reid. LSO St Luke’s, Old St, EC1V 9NG (020 7638 8891/ cc 0845 120 7591). £10-£22.

The Manfreds Rock and blues with a twist of jazz by the Paul Jones-fronted combo. Millfield Arts Centre, Silver St, N18 1PJ (020 8807 6680). £22, adv £21.

Damien OíKane Folk from the Derry-born singer-songwriter and banjo player. Kings Place, York Way, N1 9AG (020 7520 1490). £12.50, adv £9.50.

EDDIE VEDDER Hammersmith Apollo, Mon, Jul 30. £37.50+ The Pearl Jam frontman’s set to draw on his Ukulele Songs record and Into The Wild soundtrack. Plus the odd Jam track, too, we expect.

W6 9QH

Hammersmith

The Walkmen The American five-piece plays indie-rock from the album Heaven. Village Underground, Holywell Ln, EC2A 3PQ (020 7422 7505). £20.

hammersmithapollo.net

THURSDAY 14

WEDNESDAY 13

Sebastian Bach Heavy metal and hard rock from the Canadian singer and former frontman of Skid Row. O2 Academy Islington, Parkfield St, N1 0PS (020 7288 4400/ cc 0844 477 2000). £18.50.

The Albion Band Folk-rock band with a long history, now reformed with a new line-up. Half Moon, Putney, Lower Richmond Rd, SW15 1EU (020 8780 9383). £10.

Justin Townes Earle Countryrock by the Nashville-born singer-songwriter and son of Steve Earle. Koko, Camden High St, NW1 7JE (0870 432 5527). £13.

Gabby Young And Other Animals The London-based collective plays pop-tinged indie-folk. The Scala, Pentonville Rd, N1 9NL (020 7833 2022/ cc 0844 477 1000). Adv £12.50.

Mick Flannery Folk from the Cork-born troubadour.

Bush Hall, Uxbridge Rd, W12 7LJ (020 8222 6955). £15.

Hot Chip The five-piece from London play neon electronica.

Heaven, Charing Cross Arches, Villiers St, WC2N 6NG (020 7930 2020). £20.

The Kyteman Orchestra The ensemble performs electronica and contemporary classical works. O2 Academy Islington, Parkfield St, N1 0PS (020 7288 4400/ cc 0844 477 2000). £15.

Ben Montague, Kristyna Myles, Sophie Janes Londonbased pop singer-songwriter.

O2 Academy Islington, Parkfield St, N1 0PS (020 7288 4400/ cc 0844 477 2000). £11.

Terry Reid Folk and rock from the veteran singer. The Jazz Cafe, Parkway, NW1 7PG (020 7485 6834/ cc 0870 060 3777). Adv £23.50.

The Silk And Bamboo Ensemble A performance by the group of a selection of ensemble and solo pieces of traditional folk and modern Chinese music. Southbank Centre, Belvedere Rd, SE1 8XX (020 7960 4200/cc 0844 875 0073). £9.50 & £14, concs £4.75 & £7.

Chantel McGregor Blues singersongwriter. 100 Club, Oxford St, W1D 1LL (020 7636 0933). £13, adv £11.

Duane Pitre, These Feathers Have Plumes Experimental music by the composer and accompanying musicians. Cafe Oto, Ashwin St, E8 3DL (020 7923 1231). £10, adv £8.

Alan Price Soulful pop-rock from the former member of the Animals. Bull’s Head, Lonsdale Rd, Barnes, SW13 9PY (020 8876 5241). £14.

Terry Reid Folk and rock from the veteran singer-songwriter.

The Jazz Cafe, Parkway, NW1 7PG (020 7485 6834/ cc 0870 060 3777). Adv £23.50.

Lucy Wainwright Roche, Fierce County The New York-based singer-songwriter, musician and daughter of Loudon Wainwright III performs melodic, pop-tinted folk. The Slaughtered Lamb, Great Sutton St, EC1V 0DX (020 7253 1516). Adv £13.50.

FRIDAY 15

Sparks Veteran American pop-rock band best known for the hit song This Town Ain’t Big Enough For Both Of Us. Bush Hall, Uxbridge Rd, W12 7LJ (020 8222 6955). £32.50.

Dead City Ruins, Kairos, Mike Moss Classic heavy rock by the London-formed band. 229 The Venue, Great Portland St, W1W 5PW (020 7323 7229). £8, adv £6.

Suzanne Vega, Mike Doughty Folk-pop by the New Yorkbased singer-songwriter. Union Chapel, Compton Terrace, N1 2UN (020 7226 1686). Adv £29.50.

Francis And Boyd, The Isis, Our Mother The London-based band plays indie-folk. The Troubadour, Old Brompton Rd, SW5 9JA (020 7370 1434). £8, £7 before 10pm.

Albert Lee & Hogans Heroes Country-rock and blues by the veteran guitarist and colleagues. Boisdales Of Canary Wharf, Cabot Hall, E14 4QT (020 7715 5818). £10-£30.

Lovebox 2012 Eclectic music showcase. Friday features performances from Hot Chip with Crystal Castles, Magnetic Man, Madeon, Sub Focus and 2 Bears. On Saturday Friendly Fires, Groove Armada, Emeli Sande, Maverick Sabre, Kelis and Little Dragon perform live, and Sunday’s line-up includes Grace Jones, Lana Del Rey, Holly Johnson, Chic and Azari & III. Victoria Park, Grove Rd, E3 5SN (0844 844 0444).

Also Sat & Sun. Fri £29, Sat/Sun £49.50, Fri & Sat £65, Sat & Sun £87.50, weekend ticket £99.

The March Violets, Die Laughing, Explode The TV, New Manhattan Classic goth from the Leeds-based band.

O2 Academy Islington, Parkfield St, N1 0PS (020 7288 4400/ cc 0844 477 2000). £16.

Match & Fuse Festival: Tribraco, MNEK, Micah Fish, Aaron J, Scholar Tee, Ore B2b Sesame Pressure Dance-pop from London-based singer and producer Uzoechi Osisioma Emenike. XOYO, Cowper St, EC2A 4AP (020 7729 5959). £10, £4 before 10pm.

NOFX, Margate, The Varukers Punk from the veteran American four-piece featuring frontman and bassist Fat Mike. O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, Shepherd’s Bush Green, W12 8TT (020 8354 3300/ cc 0844 477 2000). Also Sun. £20.

Andrew Roachford Pop, R‘n’B and soul from the London-based singer-songwriter. The Jazz Cafe, Parkway, NW1 7PG (020 7485 6834/ cc 0870 060 3777). £20.

Tom Williams And The Boat, Three Trapped Tigers, Field Music Dark indie-rock from the London-based singersongwriter and band Butler’s Wharf Pier, Shad Thames, SE1 2YE (0844 888 9991). £25.

SUNDAY 17

Ratline, Black State Highway, Internal Scars Heavy rock band from New Zealand.

100 Club, Oxford St, W1D 1LL (020 7636 0933). £10, adv £8.

Aborted Death metal by the Belgian band. The Underworld, Camden High St, NW1 0NE (020 7482 1932). Adv £12.50.

SATURDAY 16 A Body Of People, The Vulgar Poets, Pink Crudge Caravan, The Bucket List Alt rock from the London-based band. Dublin Castle, Parkway, NW1 7AN (020 8806 2668). £7, concs £5.

Cud Veteran indie-rock band from Leeds. The Garage, Highbury Corner, N5 1RD (0870 060 3777/ cc 0844 847 1678). £12.50.

Gonjasufi Experimental hip-hop from Californian-born artist Sumach Ecks. Village Underground, Holywell Ln, EC2A 3PQ (020 7422 7505). £15, adv £12.50.

Hell Cats, The Drowning Sorrows, Steve And The Raise, Ten Bob Millionaires The band plays rockabilly, psychobilly and blues.

12 Bar Club, Denmark Place, WC2H 8NL (020 7240 2622). £6.

Ash The three-piece from Downpatrick plays their alt rock hits. The Garage, Highbury Corner, N5 1RD (0870 060 3777/ cc 0844 847 1678). £25-£80.

Chris Burn, Matt Hutchinson, Mark Browne, Sonic Pleasure, Ian Smith, Steve Beresford, John Russell Contemporary jazz by the trumpeter and accompanying musicians. The Vortex Jazz Club, Dalston Culture House, Gillett St, N16 8JH (020 7254 4097). £8.

The High White Clouds, Sanguine, Western Sand, Cynotia, MG & The Juggernaut, Last Superheroes, Drive By Wire Classic rock band from London. Nambucca, Holloway Rd, N7 6LB (020 7281 8877). £5.

Joglaresa World and traditional folk from the London-based band.

The Green Note Cafe, Parkway, NW1 7AN (020 7485 9899). Adv £10.

Jazzanova And The Herbaliser The jazz, broken beat, funk and soul collective and the experimental hip-hop group co-headline. Koko, Camden High St, NW1 7JE (0870 432 5527). £17.50.

Zena Kitt, Rob Gentry, Jonny White, Guy Le Crow, Nina Shenkman The London-based singer-songwriter plays alt pop. The Troubadour, Old Brompton Rd, SW5 9JA (020 7370 1434). £7.

Ninni Morgia & Silvia Kastel, Temperatures, Bolide Experimental guitar-based rock by the duo from New York. Cafe Oto, Ashwin St, E8 3DL (020 7923 1231). £7, adv £6.

She Wants Revenge, The Heretics, Cold In Berlin The Californian outfit plays darkwave and post-punk.

O2 Academy Islington, Parkfield St, N1 0PS (020 7288 4400/ cc 0844 477 2000). £16.

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HOW TO ENTER

Go to tntmagazine.com/competitions. See webpage for terms and conditions. Winners will be selected at random.

TWO FULL WEEKEND TICKETS TO THE RELENTLESS BOARDMASTERS 2012 Click Surf UK is giving away tickets to a bunch of festivals this summer, including the highly anticipated Relentless Boardmasters 2012 in Newquay.

The boardmasters festival runs over five days on the internationally renowned Fistral Beach, with the music festival taking place at Watergate Bay at the weekend. During the day you will be able to head down to Fistral, catch some sun and check out the world’s best surfers, skaters and BMXers competing for the top prizes.

At night, over at Watergate Bay, you will be bopping to the likes of Ed Sheeran and Dizzie Rascal among others. Conclusion: one pretty rad week to be had.

Enter at tntmagazine.com/competitions click-surf.co.uk/competitions for all the entry details

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PREVIOUS WINNERS TNT 1499: HOMELANZ TICKETS: Lisa Dighton

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Ross Learmonth The South African Prime Circle frontman on ten years in a band, meeting Nelson Mandela and why Dave Grohl rocks INTERVIEW ALASDAIR MORTON

You’re headlining Homelanz – what are you most looking forward to?

We have no expectations of the crowds – we are truly excited to be coming back to the UK and performing for our fans. We’re looking forward to watching the other bands and having a jol – or should I say ‘blast’ for those that don’t understand?

You won a SAMA for Jekyll & Hyde – did that make you proud?

It was really cool to get the SAMA because we’ve been together for 10 years and had never received one. It just proved that we still have a while to go.

Where did the name Jekyll & Hyde come from for album number four?

The title has two meanings. We all have different sides – the hard side and the soft– so it was really about that and we wanted to write songs that would show those twin aspects on the album, so Jekyll & Hyde was born. We wanted the record to stand up with the sound of so many bands we love – such as Incubus, Switch Foot, to name a few. So when [producer] Kevin Shirley and George Marino [mastering] got involved, our dreams came true. We are very happy with how it turned out.

You’ve been working on your fifth album – what can you tell us about it?

It doesn’t get any easier, I can tell you that!

As a band, we’re always trying to push ourselves, to keep moving forward and we are having a blast making it.

You’ve been going for 10 years now – what’s the secret to your longevity?

We try not take ourselves too seriously in the practice room and if anyone in the band gets a bit too cool for school we all knock them back down to size, but luckily we are all good friends and all have the same goals.

Your sound has changed from album to album but still been Prime Circle – is it important to evolve?

As a band, we get very bored very quickly so I think if we weren’t at least trying to progress, we wouldn’t last.

“It’s all about the threesomes” You played in India recently, what sort of reception did you get?

The response from the crowd was really great.

We toured all the Hard Rock Cafe’s there, and the surprising thing was how many people there love rock, especially bands like Iron Maiden.

Many groups try to break the States at some point – is that important to you?

We would love to break the States, but our focus has been more on Europe because we have had more opportunities there. In the end, though, it is just fun to play music on the road.

Where else would you like to play?

We’d love to tour Europe more extensively and head to the States as well, at some point.

Is there pressure as the frontman?

Sometimes. I am a band man so sometimes I want to just be in the back with the rest of the guys, but I suppose it comes with the territory.

What was your first gig like as a band?

It was in Witbank in SA, in a room with mates. It was a bit of a ‘rent a crowd’ gig, but it was fun.

What’s your most rock n’ roll moment?

Besides the threesomes, ha? Seriously, playing huge stadium shows, supporting bands we’ve grown up listening to, there’s nothing like it.

What’s your craziest moment on stage?

I was electrocuted while performing. I think people thought it was part of the show at first, though. I managed to pull myself together.

What does touring mean to you?

I have a very nomadic nature so it suits me perfectly. Maybe one day I’ll stay in one place, but I doubt it. It’s life on the road for me, for sure.

Who’s your rock icon?

I have always loved Dave Grohl, he’s one of rock’s greatest legends. He’s managed to balance his life and remained a good person through all the fame from being in Nirvana and Foo Fighters.

What was the first album you bought?

I was given Pantera’s A Vulgar Display Of Power when I was 15, and after that I was hooked.

When I heard Silverchair’s Frog Stomp for the first time, I knew that all I wanted to do was be in a band, and I’ve never looked back.

What’s your proudest band moment?

Definitely meeting Pres Nelson Mandela. We performed at the 46664 concert and that was a day we’ll never forget.

Prime Circle play Homelanz on June 16. £35 Boston Manor Park, TW8 9JX homelanz.co.uk Boston Manor

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Pegg got a fright when he caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror

A FANTASTIC FEAR OF EVERYTHING FILM review by Alasdair Morton STARRING: Simon Pegg, Amara Karan | 15 | 100mins

RED LIGHTS FILM STARRING: Sigourney Weaver, Cillian Murphy, Robert De Niro | 15 | 113mins

Rodrigo Cortes, the man behind the odd-sounding but surprisingly taught Buried, which put Ryan Reynolds in a box six feet under, returns with a beefed-up cast and supernatural amibitions as spook-hunters Sigourney Weaver and Cilian Murphy meet Robert De Niro’s psychic with devastating results. Going by what he achieved last time out, this should be a creepy treat.

On general release from Friday

28

Simon Pegg scored big with Shaun Of The Dead, and graduated on to multi-million pound movie franchises, such as Star Trek and Mission Impossible. His latest sees him back on Brit-flick ground, and is a gloriously quirky, funny horror-comedy.

Based on a short story by Withnail And I scribe/director Bruce Robinson, Fear tells of Jack (Pegg), a children’s writer who dreams of becoming an adult author, only to find researching Victorian murders for his planned horror novel leaves him crippled by a fear of the outside world. When a big business proposition comes his way, though, he has to face these fears, including a laundrette tied to a childhood incident, even if his darkest demons are realised.

Pegg is front and centre for the most part as lead and solo star. He holds the film together well, nailing the comedy – you’d expect him to – and handles the drama with aplomb, neatly conveying Jack’s inner turmoil as the ‘little boy lost’ who’s trying to make a break for the adult world.

First time writer-director Crispian Mills (of Kula Shaker fame) layers it with a gloriously colourful palette, Jack’s decrepit flat a seething nightmarish pit, the world outside a rabbit warren of alleyways laced with shadows and dread. The pacing is off slightly, the third act lacking the punch of the opening, and a serial killer storyline never quite gels, but it’s a feverishly irrevernt yarn, nonetheless.

GOOD FOR: Seeing Pegg back to his indie-flick roots. Read interview P30

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GIVE US A

BUSH HALL PRESENTS

GIGGLE!

COMEDY

Holly Walsh is the MC for this very special evening of comedy and funny business. Canadian Tony Law and Simon Munnery (right) are the confirmed acts so far. There’s also a special guest of the so-special-we-can’t-possiby-say-whobut-you-won’t-be-disappointed variety. So get prepared for some serious laughing.

Bush Hall 310 Uxbridge Road, W12 7LJ. June 15. £15 Shepherd’s Bush bushhallpresents.co.uk

Ha ha!

THE STONE ROSES: THE THIRD COMING

WAH! WAH! GIRLS

EXHIBITION

THEATRE

The Madchester gods are back together and have a slew of headline festival shows this summer, so get down to this exhibition and reacquaint yourselves with their heyday. Never before seen pics and backstage snaps of the band from their early days through to their iconic moments let you see behind the legend.

Britain meets Bollywood in Tanika Gupta’s lively if unsatisfactory contribution to the World Stages season. Bollywood glamour and East End reality collide in this story of love against the odds, and while the production can’t be faulted for its energy, combining the old with the new, a little more sophistication wouldn’t have hurt. LK

Whiteleys The Space, W2 4YN. June 13-Aug 12. Free Bayswater whiteleys.com

Peacock Theatre Portugal Street, WC2A 2HT. Until June 23. £15-£42 Holborn sadlerswells.com

LORETTA MAINE What’s the show about? My pain and polar bears and drinking and relationships and music. Oh, and my grandma.

Where was your first show? The Duke’s Bar in Nashville. A tough crowd. Well, it wasn’t a crowd, just two soldiers on leave and an old woman who kept singing along to my songs … even though she’d never heard them.

Photos: Simon Annand; Graeme Copper

What was your strangest show?

Inside a toilet in Aldwych. It’s a groovy cocktail bar so everyone’s there to be groovy, not listen to some hot chick sing about her pain.

COSMOPOLIS

THE LION, THE WITCH, AND THE WARDROBE

FILM

THEATRE

Robert Pattinson stars in David Cronenberg’s adaptation of Don DeLillo’s novel, about a billionare asset manager who traverses Manhattan in one fate-filled day in which he loses all of his wealth. Cronenberg’s a top fit for DeLillo’s subversive material, with Pattinson set to shake free from those Twilight shackles in a tough, uncompromising role.

Rupert Goold’s adaptation of C.S. Lewis’s classic 1949 children’s story – about wartime evacuee Lucy and her three siblings who discover an enchanted kingdom – boasts some impressive effects to create Aslan, and really comes to life in the second half as the battle between good and evil (the White Witch) is fought to the death. LK

On general release from June 15

Kensington Gardens W8 4PT. Until Sept 9. £25-£65 High Street Kensington lionwitchtheshow.com

What’s the funniest thing you have ever seen? I once saw a man covered in vomit (his own) try and jump the barrier on the Tube. He cracked his nuts and fell flat on his face. It was beautiful.

Who’s your musical icon? I love Courtney Love, she is beautiful and a mess, like a delicious pudding dropped on a concrete floor.

Previews her Edinburgh Fringe show Bipolar. June 13. 7pm. £5 The Garage, 20-22 Highbury Corner, N5 1RD Highbury & Islington

lorettamaine.co.uk

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Back to his roots, Pegg in A Fantastic Fear Of Eveything, and (below right) in his pants in the movie’s cult-classic-to-be poster

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Fear and self-loathing Simon Pegg loves blockbusters as well as indie flicks, as we find out ahead of his latest horror comedy A Fantastic Fear Of Everything WORDS ALASDAIR MORTON

“I’m the funny British guy who creeps up and makes jokes in difficult situations.” This is Simon Pegg’s assessment of the way that Americans perceive him. It’s a surmise that is fairly accurate: the comedy relief in the Mission Impossible movies opposite Tom Cruise; the bumbling, smart-alec Scotty in the multi-million-dollar Star Trek franchise; he is often to be found doling out the funnies. But this is only part of the repertoire for Brit’s biggest film export who, as a writer, producer and former stand up, finds himself in the enviable position of straddling the twin worlds of small independent British movies and mega-bucks Hollywood output.

TNT catches up with Pegg in London ahead of the release of his latest movie A Fantastic Fear of Everything. The film a dark quirk-filled ‘semi-comedy’ that Pegg co-produced about a writer struggling with a fear of the outside world, sees the Gloucestershire-born star back working in the indie world where he started out.

“It’s a crazy adventure about a writer trying to overcome a crisis in both his career and his personal life. Jack [Pegg] is a children’s author who becomes embarrassed by his work and wants to express the dark side of his life,” explains the film’s co-director Crispian Mills, former frontman for defunct Britpoppers Kula Shaker and long-time friend of Pegg’s.

“He turns to writing about serial killers and in the process of researching this completely freaks himself out.

He becomes so familiar with the hackers, dossers, severers and poisoners of the 19th century that they start giving him nightmares.”

Fear offers plenty of comedy for Pegg to get his teeth into, as Jack bumbles around his flat, shut off from the outside world where every creaky floorboard and noise in the street is someone out to kill him. But there’s also some meaty drama, as this stunted recluse confronts the childhood demons that have plagued him since he was abandoned by his mother.

For Pegg, who is on screen solo for most of the film’s running time (much of the time in his Y-fronts, “I was very happy to come to work in my pants, it was very comfortable and enjoyable situation”), it offered a new challenge.

“I had to give so much of myself as a performer,” Pegg explains. “I couldn’t rely on my fellow actors – when I do Star Trek, I am part of an ensemble and it’s easy to sit back and relax. Here, I have to carry it a bit, it feels a little bit more

incumbent on me.” The film began as an adaptation of Bruce Robinson’s novella Paranoia In The Launderette about a man struggling with inner demons that manifests in a fear of said high street service, which Crispian, his filmmaker ambitions hitherto unknown to Pegg, adapted into a short.

“It was very funny, but there isn’t a platform for short film

“

I’m the funny British guy making jokes

”

anymore,” Pegg recalls. “I said: ‘If you can flesh it out and give it a third act, it’s something I would be interested in’.”

Crispian went away, put pen to paper, and came back with Fear – a children’s author narrative and a serial killer bent his new additions to the already off kilter comedy.

The filming itself was a far cry from the US work Pegg has been involved in recently. Holing up in Shepperton Studios, ››

Live long and prosper: Pegg on red carpet duties for Star Trek TNTMAGAZINE.COM

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Clockwise from above: Pegg, Frost and a theatre of Pauls; Hot Fuzz; Shaun Of The Dead; Spaced

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dipping his toe in both ends of the movie pool. He claims not to be interested in TV, where “all the serious actors are migrating”, because he doesn’t want to be tied down to one role for the next seven years, but has just completed a singleepisode role in Frank Darabont’s (The Walking Dead) 1940s set crime drama pilot LA Noir for network TNT. “I went from

“

I got out all my NWA and Ice Cube records

”

playing a Scottish space engineer to a Jewish Californian comic and that was a challenge.”

His next project, The World’s End, the third and final instalment in his and Edgar Wright’s ‘Cornetto trilogy’ about a group of friends who embark on a pub crawl to reunite their friendships and fight off middle-aged ennuie and, perhaps, save the earth from a world-ending threat, marks a coming together of both aspects of Pegg’s career, in a way.

“It’s probably the highest-budget film we are going to make in the UK,” he teases of the sci-fi comedy, clearly relishing the ambition of this home-grown project. Before that though, there’s next summer’s Star Trek 2, and right now, his battles to overcome a fear of the whole world, save the day, get the girl, and write a bestseller. You get the feeling that were this on the real world Pegg’s ‘to-do’ list it wouldn’t be beyond him to do just that. ❚ A Fantastic Fear Of Everything is out now through Universal

Photos: Getty

filming lasted just 28 days. “The last shoot I did was seven months, and before that it was five,” Pegg says of Fear’s production schedule’s comparisons with his latest US projects.

“The soundstage we shot on was where [Crispian’s] mother Hayley and father met when they made [1966 Brit flick] The Family Way and we didn’t know that until Hayley came on set and said ‘I met your father here’ and we then realised we were filming in the room responsible for Crispian’s existence!”

The film itself is a proudly British combination of quirks, comedy, horror and witty lyricism, with animated flights of fancy courtesy of co-director Chris Hopewell, and a sequence in which Jack prepares for a big business meeting by drying his pants in an oven and getting pumped up listening to some gangster rap.

“I got out all my old NWA and Ice Cube records and had great fun reacquainting myself with Straight Outta Compton.

I had to do that moment as seriously as possible – a white guy in two towels [one at his waist, one on his head] rapping was going to be funny no matter what!”

While Pegg balances both indies and studio work, he seems predisposed to neither. He relishes the freedom of working independently – “writers are so far down the food chain, if you write a film, you need to direct it otherwise it will be destroyed” – but is clearly enamoured with biggerscale events, too.

He has a love for cinema, but is not especially fond of the current vogue for the “3D nonsense” tactics to get audiences from their couches, back into the theatre. When talking of the British film industry, or lack of (“in the US they have a film industry, here we have a lot of talented people, which is not an industry”), it becomes clear, though, he enjoys TNTMAGAZINE.COM

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LIFESTYLEHEALTH CLASS OF THE WEEK

CXWORX This short-and-sharp workout is only 30 minutes long, but the benefits will last all week. Created by global fitness organisation Les Mills, CXWORX combines the best of personal training with the energy of a group class to tone and strengthen the core. The workout consists of exercises that isolate muscles, such as crunches and leg extensions. It also integrates various muscle groups through standing balance and hovers.

At first, the instructor will explain which groups make up the core and why training them is important, so you will know what is hurting later and why. The class then goes through a warm-up designed to gradually activate those muscles before the real workout begins.

Choreographed routines to chart-topping hits target the torso and sling muscles that connect your upper body to your lower body.

This workout is ideal for tightening your tummy and butt for summer, while improving functional strength and assisting in injury prevention – all in just half an hour. And, the class burns on average 230 calories – that’s a couple of choccy bikkies at least!

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Feeling sporty Fancy taking part in the games you played at school? Here’s how to find a team in London WORDS CAROL DRIVER

Remember the team sports you played at school? How working out never felt like a chore? Now that summer’s here, it’s time to ditch the gym for outside activities to burn the fat, have fun and make new friends.

Here, we look at some of the clubs on offer in London.

Go Mammoth, London-wide Go Mammoth has netball teams across London, including Balham, Clapham and Tooting. Play in either mixed or ladies-only leagues, and you can make it as serious or fun as you want with recreational, intermediate or competitive levels available.

There’s also fun off the court, with a social club offering everything from bar crawls and costume parties, to boat cruises and charity events. Registration is from £65 and includes eight to 12 games. Also check out the website if you’re up for volleyball, touch rugby, dodgeball and football. gomammoth.co.uk

Tag Rugby, London-wide Tag Rugby is a minimal contact team game in which each player wears velcro patches with

two tags on their shorts. They then attempt to dodge, evade and pass a rugby ball while defenders try to prevent them “tagging” – pulling a tag from the ball carrier. Having started in August 2009, there are now 142 teams across London at 13 venues. The good news is you don’t have to be super-fit to take part, plus, there are organised social events, including to Royal Ascot. Bonus. trytagrugby.com

London Wayfarers, Battersea If the thought of someone belting towards you brandishing a weapon is your idea of fun, hockey is definitely for you. The London Wayfarers, based in Battersea, field seven men’s and seven women’s sides every Saturday. You don’t need to be an experienced player to join the teams – training nights depend on what level you’re at. Most Saturday evenings, players can usually be found drinking in their clubhouse, The Latchmere. londonwayfarers.com

Putney Basketball, SW London Know your dribbling from your ball

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LOOKING GOOD

Structure control Guys, make sure your spikes hold up £9.95 structurehair.co.uk

Julie was relishing her first sunshine for seven years

hogging? Then sign yourself up to a basketball team in London. Putney Basketball Club plays every Tuesday and Thursday nights. And they’re currently looking for more people. “The club is open to all. We play mixed games with people of all abilities. Come along and get involved, we are always delighted to meet new people,” a spokesman says. Sessions cost from £4. londonbasketball.com

Exiles, London-wide Providing a team for ex-pats and immigrants from around the world, this group first started in 1987, and now has clubs across London. Home games take place in South Park, Fulham, and there’s a special Exiles v Exiles match on Saturday, August 4. “It’s not too late to join if you’re looking to join

a London cricket club, just send us an email,” a spokesman says.

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8th Day Adventure, London-wide Play tennis, go horse riding, try archery, attempt rollerskating or go for a mountain bike ride – whatever your preference, there’s something on offer every day with this organisation. Members pay £14 a month, and some activities cost extra, but there’s a load of sports taking across the capital which are included. There’s a huge emphasis on socialising, with weekends away NEXT WEEK surfing as well as monthly events We examine the and quiz nights. best London apps

Frontcover Cosmetics Shade your face for summer £12 frontcovercosmetics.co.uk

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Photos: neyphotography.com

TOP TREATMENT: JAMIE STEVENS SALON Recently nominated British Hairdresser of the Year and annointed Celebrity Hairdresser of the Year, Jamie Stevens is the man of the moment. I visited his new Kensington salon, where affordable luxury is the order of the day. I sit in a relaxing massage chair, and soak up the salubrious surroundings. Friendly staff immediately put me at ease. Senior stylist Jonathan talks me through my options and I am given a serious contender for my best haircut ever. £50

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Sranrom Urban Wellness Relax in style – for guys and gals £14 sranrom.co.uk

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LIFESTYLECAREERS

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Head of the class: your skills will be tested in a city like London

Head of the class Teaching definitely has its ups and downs, but it’s a rewarding career which can offer flexibility to travel WORDS REBECCA KENT Like working with kids? Want oodles of holiday as well as a decent salary?

Well, join the queue – a survey last week revealed more Londoners than ever are considering a career in teaching. The Teaching Line survey showed most people think the career has kudos. Here, TNT explains how you can get ahead of the rest.

Down Under stars Schools might be tightening budgets, but there’s still a definite demand for teachers – especially for those with enthusiasm, good behaviour management and patience.

Headteachers admit they see these qualities in Antipodean candidates, and therefore are more inclined to take them on, says Greg Brown, of SANZA 36

teaching agency (sanzateaching.com.

He adds: “Some schools ask specifically for Aussie and Kiwi teachers – the Anzac attitude puts them in good stead.”

The market Positions are highly concentrated in densely populated areas such as Wandsworth and Peckham, particularly for high school teachers.

“Teachers are now recognising the necessity to consider converting their primary experience into secondary capability,” Margaret Howell, of Classroom Teacher Limited (classroomteachers.co.uk), says.

It’s important to be flexible, too – don’t assume all schools in a bad area will be filled with problem pupils.

Brown says: “Don’t let the reputation

of an allocation steer you away from a job. It’s not like cities in the southern hemisphere where you’ve got a town on the wrong side of the tracks.

“London is a collection of small villages, so you might go into a nice area that has a terrible school and vice versa.”

Primary teacher Jen Ward, who hails from Sydney, has worked in London for nine months, and hasn’t experienced any behaviour issues from the children she teaches. “I understand this is the exception,” she says.

“But the biggest shock, if anything, is having a teaching assistant do my photocopying in the morning.”

Get the ball rolling The best way to get a foot in the door is by obtaining contract work with

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T: 0207 223 0006 E: info@impactteachers.com Twitter: @ImpactTeachers

ON THE JOB BELINDA CORANI CAREER Home Conscious founder AGE 35 LIVES Ealing FROM West London

Why Impact teachers?

We seek to build personal relationships with our teachers in the UK in an effort to find your ideal teaching position. You can rest assured our staff will make your transition seamless.

Teach in your subject area Secure a long term or short term position Access to tailored online services

Photos: Thinkstock

For every day a teacher works with us, we provide a day’s education for a child in need.

In addition to working in the UK, you also have the opportunity to give back to the cause of education in India and Uganda during the summer!

a teaching agency.

TIPS FOR TEACHERS need to do is fill in a Brown says: “Short-term Richard Knell of Hays Education form when you register work is a great way with an agency. As an • Don’t join too many agencies. for a teacher to check OTT, you’re allowed to • Be clear about where you out schools in London, teach in the UK for a want to be long-term, and build to find out where and maximum of four years a relationship with your recruiter. what they like and before you’ll need to • Move on to jobs with a full dislike, and to network. have obtained Qualified written reference from a previous “If a school likes Teacher Status. employer or teaching placement. you and vice versa If you have no • Do research the UK curriculum often it can lead to relevant qualification, and have lesson plans prepared permanent work.” before working as a supply teacher. you can work as a cover The plus side to supervisor, or supply • Go out of your way to impress short-term contracts teacher. Your criminal your employers. Schools like is that you can travel history will be checked continuity and they will ask you between jobs, outside so make sure you can to come back if you get off on the peak holiday periods. provide records. right foot.

When doing shortThe pay term work, don’t miss out on professional development Contract teachers earn about £120 opportunities. These could help you a day – or up to £150 a day for longer earn more cash when home. And get roles. Teachers can earn £27,000 involved in social events. a year in London.

“They’re great way for teachers to Buddy up share war stories over a can of beer,” Brown says.

Register with a specialist teaching agency to find work, keeping in mind The qualifications the school year ends in July. Even at that time, maintain a good You must hold a UK-recognised relationship with your teaching qualification to work. teaching agency Overseas Trained Teachers (OTT) need – they may tee to register with the General Teaching NEXT WEEK up some work Council (GTC), which is the central Can you make for you for when governing body. cash blogging? you return.

It costs £36.50 to join, but all you

How did you get into your line of work?

I work as a lifestyle adviser, interior designer and project manager – a combination of jobs I just fell into.

It was a natural progression from fashion styling.

What do you do day-to-day?

Anything from supervising removal companies to crawling under a bath to find the source of a leak. I also try out mattresses, source fabrics and unusual and cool products.

What’s the best part of your job?

Seeing the results and knowing that I have developed a genuine feel for what my clients want.

What’s the most challenging part?

Finding bizarre things in houses and trying not to laugh, run away from, or admonish the owner. I have found lawnmowers in wardrobes and half a skeleton in an attic. You have to be diplomatic with both suppliers and clients, especially in London.

HOW TO ... CHOOSE A RECESSION-PROOF JOB Pick a job that will weather a period of austerity

• Healthcare technology: due

to an increasingly ageing population, the number of people suffering from illnesses is rising.

• IPhone apps: people are now

using these to carry out any number of tasks in their daily lives. Demand will ensure it withstands the recession.

• Confectionary: Most brands

survived the Great Depression – ‘nuff said.

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tntjobs.co.uk THE AMPERSAND HOTEL T: 020 7589 5895 www.ampersandhotel.com

JOB OF THE WEEK: Waiters/Waitresses/Baristas/Bartenders Location: Kensington, South West London (SW7) Salary: Competitive plus Service Charge

Opening in August of this year in the heart of London’s museum district, South Kensington, The Ampersand Hotel is simultaneously grounded in history and ultra-modern with splashes of contemporary art.

Exciting new opening based in the heart of South Kensington. Now looking for talented & enthusiastic individuals to join our F&B team. Must have a vivacious personality & be enthusiastic and charming. Possess a sense of ownership and delivery, be self-motivated & able to work on own initiative, as well as part of a team.

THE AMPERSAND HOTEL

JOB OF THE WEEK: Chef de Parties / Breakfast Chef / Night Chef Location: Kensington, South West London (SW7) Salary: Competitive plus Service Charge

T: 020 7589 5895 www.ampersandhotel.com

Bushra, HR Manager | CV’s in the first instance | recruitment@ampersandhotel.com

Opening in August of this year in the heart of London’s museum district, South Kensington, The Ampersand Hotel is simultaneously grounded in history and ultra-modern with splashes of contemporary art.

Exciting new opening based in the heart of South Kensington. Now looking for talented & experienced chef to join our team. Must be passionate about food, well presented & enthusiastic. Possess a sense of ownership and creativity, be self-motivated & able to work on own initiative, as well as part of a team.

VIBE TEACHER RECRUITMENT

JOB OF THE WEEK: Financial Controller Location: Hammersmith, London Salary: (from) £25k - £35k + bonus + benefit

www.vibeteaching.co.uk Vibe is a well respected London-based teaching agency with a reputation for excellent knowledge, skills, service and standards.

BERRY MARQUEES T: 01784 471 410 www.berrymarquees.com

Bushra, HR Manager | CV’s in the first instance | recruitment@ampersandhotel.com

Responsibility for: Payroll, Invoicing, Credit Control, Bookkeeping, Accounting and must have certified experience in Sage Line 50 and Sage Payroll Software. Organised, driven and friendly please. Send CV and introduce yourself!

Craig | craig@vibeteaching.co.uk

JOB OF THE WEEK: Marquee Foreman, Riggers, Warehouse Crew, HGV & Forklift Location: London Salary: £8 - £10ph + daily bonuses

Suppliers of stunning temporary structures to the event industry. From world famous sporting and music events to fashion shows, lavish private parties and royal weddings.

Berry are looking to immediately recruit hard working, motivated team members to join our existing crews installing temporary structures throughout the UK this summer.

The work is physically demanding but long hours and bonuses provide great earning potential. Located 30 minutes on train from Clapham Junction. info@berrymarquees.com | 01784 471 410

GALLOWGLASS

JOB OF THE WEEK: Crew Location: London Salary: £8 - £11 per hour + skills payments

T: 0845 300 2468 www.gallowglass.co.uk Gallowglass is UKs leading crewing company to the sporting and events industry, working for TV, theatre, film and outdoor production companies.

RUSH COURIERS T: 020 7323 2375 www.rushcouriers.co.uk Rush are a same-day courier company offering international, overnight and urgent delivery services throughout London and the UK.

Gallowglass is involved in many aspects of the 2012 Games as well as our on-going work, and has vacancies for friendly, enthusiastic and outgoing people to join our crew.

You will need to be physically fit, have excellent spoken English, be adaptable, happy to work anti-social hours and have a can-do attitude.

CV to hr@gallowglass.co.uk or fill in our on line form at www.gallowglass.co.uk

JOB OF THE WEEK: Same-day owner bike\van courier Location: London & South East Salary: Call for rates Same-day couriers needed for our West end office.

Part-timers and beginners welcome though you will need your own vehicle.

Leon Gamble | 020 7079 2485 | leon.gamble@rushcouriers.co.uk

Looking for your next job?

NEW JOBS ONLINE EVERY DAY To advertise your job of the week contact Matt Syder | 020 7989 0491 | matt.syder@tntmagazine.com

TNT_1502_JOTW_FP.indd 38

JOBS JOBS 8/6/12 17:21:11

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CASH SAVING TIPS FIRE HER UP Xxxxxxxxx The recent blast of heat lent itself to weekends XXXXXXXXX spent sizzling snags on Xxxxxxxxxxx the barbie. But if your living arrangement fails XXXXXXXXX to accommodate a fourXxxxxxxxxxx burner, then snap up a disposable BBQ from XXXXXXXXX Poundland for just £1.

Xxxxxxxxxxx They retail for at least £3 elsewhere, so that’s reason XXXXXXXXX enough to stock up.

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Photos: Thinkstock

LOG ON FOR CASHBACK Web shoppers can bag as much as £1000 a year buying via cashback sites.

At Quidco, members earn an average of £262 annually for purchasing anything on the site from groceries and household goods, to paying for mobile phone contracts and home insurance. quidco.co.uk

HOW YOU SPEND IT! Any money-saving tips for when you first arrive?

‘Minesweep’. That is, wait until everyone is drunk and walk around the pub/bar/ club/party and take sips from their drinks or even commandeer abandoned beverages. Also, get a job that provides staff meals.

The food will probably be bad, but free.

SCOTT WALKER, 31 JOB Personal trainer FROM Sydney LIVES Fulham How do you budget?

I married a girl whose second love is Excel

spreadsheets, so she does the budgeting. Like most wives, she spends my money for me. Also, being overworked and underpaid means I have very little time to spend the small amount money I do have.

Last big blow-out?

I bought ticket home this year for Christmas – bring on three weeks in the sun.

What non-essential items do you spend money on?

None. Red wine is essential.

HOW THEY SPEND IT! Giving it all away There was money to spare for Russian millionaire Pavel Durov, who was caught throwing paper planes made out of 5000 rouble (£102) notes. Here’s how others splash cash

❚ Unemployed Washington man Reed Sandridge gave away US$10 (£6.44) a day to strangers during 2010, his ‘year of giving’, in his mother’s memory.

FLIPPIN’ CHEAP FLIP-FLOPS It’s time your feet said hello to the world. Do it by snapping Havaiana flip-flops from Matalan for £10. That’s a simply massive saving of £7.99 on most pairs compared to competitors’ prices. matalan.co.uk FILM REVIEW /30 SINGAPORE /76

LIFESTYLEMONEY

The money plane

❚ An Australian man who blamed greed on ruining his marriage sold his family home for $395,000 (£250,000) in 2011, and donated it all to charity to spite his ex-wife.

Isn’t revenge sweet?

❚ An 80-year-old US man accidentally gave away his life savings of $13,000 (£8372) last year when he made a clothing donation, forgetting the dosh was sewn inside a suit lining.

❚ A mystery person slipped envelopes with £50 and a festive message into Devon shoppers’ baskets at Christmas last year. The season to be jolly, indeed.

Front of House Waiting Staff Westfield, Stratford City £8.60 ph - £10.45 ph Absolute Taste provides the finest hospitality for the VIP guests of the Vodafone McLaren Mercedes Formula 1 team and has a reputation for excellent food, exciting party design and professional staff. We recently won an exciting contract to be the official caterer of Westfield Stratford during the Olympic games. We are currently recruiting highly experienced staff to work with us on this exciting project this summer. The pay will be £8.60 during the off peak period and £10.45 during the peak period.

If you have fantastic customer service skills and are immaculately presented then send your CV and picture to staffing@absolutetaste.com

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£9.

Queen tea towel Because we’re still mad for the royals etsy.com

One to watch A once-overlooked corner of London is becoming a buzzword in real estate circles Walthamstow, E17

99

£1.

A to B: ‘The Stow’ is well connected

WORDS REBECCA KENT

Banksy coasters Take some art home wellcoolstuff.com

.99

£29

Map wall stickers Plan travelling in style thebinarybox.co.uk

Recently named by spareroom.co.uk as London’s best place to rent, ‘the Stow’ is no longer an inferior pocket of the capital.

Increasingly within the sights of househunters who are reclaiming the east, it has emerged as a groovy, if gritty, place to call home.

Why Walthamstow?

It’s cheap, with the Global Financial Crisis to thank for its immunity from the gentrification juggernaut gripping north and east London, leaving renters to benefit from a ripple effect from the Stratford regeneration. Spareroom.co.uk was especially impressed with Walthamstow’s proximity to the City as it nominated it the area in London for value and convenience. It is also one of those rare urban corners framed by some serious countryside – Walthamstow Marshes, Lee Valley and Epping Forest, a hidden gem.

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Picnic blanket For those long summer days tigerstores.co.uk

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Where to hang out Walthamstow Village, 10 minutes from Walthamstow Central, is a sophisticated hub, with delis, organic food shops and charming pubs and restaurants, including Eat 17, which is making waves for its Brit fare (eat17.co.uk).

Also try tapas restaurant the Orford

The people Mike Buniak, from Bairstow Eves in Hoe Street, explains Walthamstow is attracting young professionals priced out of the increasingly expensive property market.

“People are migrating here from comparatively expensive markets in north London and Hackney, where prices are prohibitively expensive,” he says.

“It’s got a balanced, ethnic community and is a reasonably pleasant area to live.”

£6.

Walthamstow Central, which takes 22 minutes to get to Oxford Street. National Rail from Walthamstow Central and St James Street gets you to Liverpool Street in a reasonable 20 minutes.

Sean Hewitt, from Spencer’s Property in Hoe Street, says: “There so much in the way of night buses, which means young City professionals can stay out after work for a meal or enjoy a few drinks, knowing it’ll be easy to get home.”

The connections Walthamstow is in Zone 3, served by the Victoria line at Blackhorse Road and

Saloon (32 Orford Road E17 9NJ). There are also decent pubs on Wood Street and Coppermill Lane, plus The Standard Music Venue (standardmusicvenue.co.uk) puts on covers bands. During the day, stock up on fruit and veg for a steal at Walthamstow Market, Europe’s longest outdoor market.

And journalist Janine Kelso, 33, says: “For

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MY AREA ELEANORE ROBINSON Journalist,

35 “Walthamstow is a little gem people rarely venture out of Central London to discover. At the heart is its vibrant street market and unpretentious cafes and pubs.”

NICK

DALY Ops Mgr,

30

Clockwise: tuck into tasty tapas; some serious countryside: get to the markets

cheap vintage clothes, vinyl and antiques, I recommend Wood Street Indoor Market.”

Get lungfuls of fresh air at the marshes and canals – a wonderland for walkers and cyclists. Plus, the area’s central green space, Lloyd Park, has just been given a multimillion pound re-vamp and now has a skate park. Also steal on over to Lea Bridge Road for ice skating and horseriding.

What can you rent?

The Warner flat is unique to Walthamstow and probably provides the best value, says Huseyin Sem, of Kings Group, in Hoe Street.

“They are one-, two- or three-bedroom maisonettes, a majority of which can be found in the Lloyd Park area and around Blackhorse Lane,” he explains.

More expensive, and smaller, are the Victorian Terraces, found in the Village area.

However, Bairstow Eves’s Mike Buniak warns Walthamstow’s property bargains won’t last much longer.

NEXT WEEK “Prices will rise,” he says. “The Making money from parties trendy effect is bubbling out.”

“It’s really easy to get to from the City, but far enough away so there’s peace and quiet when I want it – plus, I’ve got a garden with a barbecue, and that’s sublime.”

PAWEL

KOLAT Software

engineer, 34 “If you’re prepared to look beyond the grimness, Walthamstow has a really bohemian feel to it, as lots of artists and media types seem to be moving into the area.”

E17 INFO BOROUGH

Waltham Forest COUNCIL TAX

£1458.93 per year, Band D TRAVEL TIME TO LONDON

Photos: Waltham Forest Council

20 mins HOUSESHARE £120pw

ONE-BEDROOM FLAT £995pcm

TWO-BEDROOM FLAT £1100pcm

A master bedroom in a fully furnished house, sharing with four housemates. The property includes a garden, broadband, and is near Walthamstow Central station.

A refurbished Victorian flat in Edward Road, a 10-minute walk from two stations. It includes a garden, a large storage loft, and a bay-window living room.

A two double-bedroom ground floor Warner flat in the Lloyd Park area. It’s got gas central heating, a shared garden and a kitchen stocked with modern appliances.

spareroom.co.uk

zoopla.co.uk

needaproperty.com

TUBE

Zone 3; Victoria line, Overground; National Rail AVERAGE ROOM SHARE 1-BED

£481pcm AVERAGE RENTAL 1-BED

£850pcm AVERAGE FLAT 1-BED

£170,000

TNTMAGAZINE.COM

FINAL 1502 living spotlight walt41 41

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8/6/12 15:25:54

WORLDVIEW

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Hot goods: the new site

SITE TO UNITE THEFT VICTIMS WITH GOODS NEW ZEALAND A wizard sitting on a throne and a stuffed ferret are some of the items listed on a new site, aiming to reunite owners with stolen goods.

Victims can place images and descriptions of property lifted from their homes on stolenz.co.nz.

Created by a Rotorua couple, the site has had 15,000 hits in its first week.

Items posted also include a 1902 South African Republic and Orange Free State War Medal taken from a home in Cambridge in 2002.

TWEETS OF THE WEEK @gregjames Has anyone been dragged through a hedge backwards and then had someone say ‘you look like you’ve been dragged through a hedge backwards’? @jamiesont Viewer complaints about Royal Pageant on BBC means Queen will take her chat show to ITV & Phillip will move to LA & marry Katy Perry

‘VAMPIRE’ CORPSES UNEARTHED BULGARIA Two skeletons unearthed by archaeologists were pierced through the chest with iron rods to keep them from turning into vampires.

The practice was common in the Middle Ages. According to pagan beliefs, people considered bad during their lifetime, would terrorise the living at midnight.

The rods would also pin them down in their graves to prevent them from leaving, the head of the natural history museum said. “These two skeletons stabbed 42

Is it a pear? An apple? No, it’s a papple! The latest New Zealand fruit hybrid creation is now heading for the UK. The European and Asian pears cross resulted in the fruit, which is similar to an apple. But not just any apple – this one costs £1 and is on sale in M&S

with rods illustrate a practice which was common in some Bulgarian villages up until the first decade of the 20th century,” Bozhidar Dimitrov added after the recent find in the Black Sea town of Sozopol.

TWO SICK PENGUINS STOLEN FROM REHAB AUSTRALIA Thieves have stolen two penguins, one with a limp and the other that bites, from a care centre on South Australia’s Granite Island.

Police said thieves broke into the centre between May 30 and June 1 and stole five-year-old

female Alice and two-year-old male Kennie.

Alice is micro-chipped and has a medical condition called bumble foot, which causes her to limp. While Kennie is described as aggressive. Police said both penguins had special dietary and vitamin needs and were undergoing rehabilitation on Granite Island, south of Adelaide.

It comes after British tourists Rhys Owen Jones, 21, and Keri Mules, 20, stole a penguin from Sea World on the Gold Coast while on a drunken binge last month. Both men pleaded guilty to trespass, stealing, and unlawfully keeping a protected animal and were each fined $1000 (£640).

TNTMAGAZINE.COM

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8/6/12 17:40:33

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THIS WEEK

IN NUMBERS 10

‘Hahaha. Fooled you – it’s not actually porn. Hahaha’

Number, in millions, of Linkedin passwords stolen by a Russian hacker then leaked on a cybercrime forum

DIET GOGGLES TAKE THE BISCUIT JAPAN Goggles that trick the wearer into thinking the snack they’re eating is bigger have been unveiled in Japan, offering hope to weak-willed dieters.

Researchers at the University of Tokyo have developed devices that use computer wizardry and augmented reality to fool the senses and make users feel more satisfied with smaller – or less appealing – treats.

On one device goggle-mounted cameras send images to a computer, which magnifies the apparent size of the cookie in the image it displays to the wearer while keeping his hand the same size, making the snack appear larger than it actually is.

In experiments, volunteers consumed nearly 10 per cent less when the biscuits appeared 50 per cent bigger.

STOP SWEARING? NO #@!!%*! WAY!

Photos: Getty; AAP; Thinkstock

UNITED KINGDOM Swearing is the most difficult habit to break, beating the likes of drinking too much caffeine, smoking and chewing fingernails, according to a UK poll.

More than a quarter (26 per cent) of the 600 people questioned said using too many expletives in conversations was their biggest vice, the survey by ECigaretteDirect. co.uk found.

Drinking too much caffeine came second in the poll of habits difficult to beat, with 18 per cent saying giving up their daily cups of tea and coffee was the hardest thing to quit.

1502 World News.indd 43

Months Brit Matthew Taylor was in a coma before he started crying after hearing his girlfriend’s voice down the phone

30

Amount, in tonnes, of rubbish a London couple hoarded in their council home. It piled to the ceiling in most rooms

Times, per day, women think about fashion, according to a UK study that revealed men think about sex 20 times a day

‘You can’t still be tired, you’ve slept for days’

NO SEX PLEASE, WE’RE TOO TIRED

6.5

91

QUOTE OF THE WEEK

NEW ZEALAND More than a third of Kiwi women in relationships are too tired to have sex, a study has revealed.

The findings fly in the face of controversial comments made by Conservative Party leader Colin Craig last month, who said New Zealand women are the most promiscuous in the world.

The Next survey, for which 1000 women over 15 were quizzed, also found one in 20 of the working female population is taking illegal drugs just to get through the day.

And some 61 per cent feel the crime rate in the country is out of control.

Cary Hayward, National Practice Manager of Relationship Services, suggests the lack of sex drive is due to couples deciding to have kids.“When people have children, both sexual satisfaction and relationship satisfaction go down,” he said.

Women would walk by, and you would literally see them buckle. I’ve never seen anything like it in my life.

He probably could have had sex with 150 women a day Alec Baldwin on pal and Rock Of Ages costar Russell Brand’s sex appeal

8/6/12 17:40:39

tntjobs.co.uk JOB OF THE WEEK: LEON JAEGGI & SONS LTD T: 020 7434 4545 E: richard.galbraith@jaeggi.com

Sales Admin Assistant Location: 10 minutes walk from CX Salary: £15,000 Looking for an interested applicant with a good work ethic. Needs to be computer literate and a natural communicator.

Please send a full up to date CV to: richard.galbraith@jaeggi.com

CONTIKI HOLIDAYS T: 020 8290 6777 www.contiki.com Contiki Holidays is the world leader in youth travel and has inspired 18 - 35 year olds to travel to the world’s most fantastic destinations for 50 years.

CUBITT HOUSE

JOB OF THE WEEK: Sales & Marketing Executive Location: Bromley South - Kent Salary: On Application This hands-on role would ideally suit someone with a minimum of 2 years Sale & marketing experience, possess a sound understanding of online marketing strategies & social media, has outstanding communication and analytical skills and capable of working to tight deadlines, unsupervised and under pressure.

Sarah Tucker – Marketing Manager | sarah.tucker@contiki.com

www.cubitthouse.co.uk

JOB OF THE WEEK: Waiting Staff Location: London Salary: £9-11 per hour

Cubitt House is an expanding, family run business with four lovingly restored gastro pubs in Central and West London.

We are currently recruiting for experienced waiting staff to join our team.

We are looking for energetic and confident people. You should have a genuine interest in the industry, people and of course great food and wine!

TAKE ON LTD

JOB OF THE WEEK: Chef De Partie Location: London Salary: Competitive

T: 020 3174 8047 www.takeonservices.com

Natalie Papas | jobs@cubitthouse.co.uk

Description here: we are a Recruitment company catering for private and public events. We offer friendly and professional staff for the events and hospitality industry.

Description here looking for experienced Chefs, to work part time and especially at the London OLYMPICS with competitive wages; applicants will need to have as minimum NVQ level 2 for both, Health & Safety and Food Safety (– 1st year student level)

IPG T: 07716 376 408

JOB OF THE WEEK: Best Backpackers Jobs ever Location: UK, Ireland, Australia, New Zealand Salary: Average £600 pw. Make £10,000 by Summer

IPG is an international company marketing leisure events (paintball, go-karting, theme parks).

Work as part of a team at outdoor shows/indoor shopping centres across the country.

See the sights, and have fun along the way. IPG’s promo teams comprise 150+ Aussies, Kiwis, Canadians, and more. Free drinks every Friday night.

Soockui Vasquez | Soockui.vasquez@takegroup.co.uk

07716 376 408

Looking for your next job?

NEW JOBS ONLINE EVERY DAY To advertise your job of the week contact Matt Syder | 020 7989 0491 | matt.syder@tntmagazine.com

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JOBS JOBS 8/6/12 17:24:59

TNT puts the world to rights

OURVIEW

COMMENT: OLI JONES

oliver.jones@tntmagazine.com

Stewards at the Thames Jubilee Pageant keep the crowd in line

Wanted: poor people willing to be taken advantage of

Photos: Getty

CPUK scandal proves exploitation is alive and well in Britain

I’ve got a job offer for you: one 16-hour shift as a steward, including lunch, transportation and uniform (poncho). Fancy it? Oh, the pay? Well it’s either £2.60 per hour or for free with the ‘chance’ to work at the Olympics. Did I mention you have to camp under London Bridge? Pretend you’re a goblin, it’ll be fine.

Not fancy it? No? And think about how desperate you’d have to be to even consider it. Well, some people on jobseeker’s allowance are: they worked at the Jubilee Pageant on exactly these terms, probably because they were told by the charity Tomorrow’s People, run by a Tory Lord Baroness Scott, that it was a good opportunity. CPUK, awarded the contract to run the event security at the Jubilee, is run by Molly Prince (who has apologised for what happened, blaming logistics problems), whose eight previous companies offering similar services have been dissolved. This is also the business providing fire marshals and security staff at the Olympics. In light of the above, is CPUK the best firm for the job?

A pathetically telling interview in the Daily Mail with a worker keen to defend CPUK ends with the line: “I personally volunteered to do all three days work as I found the experience incredibly pleasurable. I look forward to a long career with CPUK.” Now, even the most creative mind would struggle to enjoy find standing in the drizzle for 16 hours watching people wave flags – I’ll leave you to draw your own conclusions.

Most laughable is the £2.60 ‘apprentice wages’ paid to many workers. The job of a steward is essentially to stand somewhere and watch people. It strikes me that it wouldn’t be outlandishly egotistical for a person with zero experience in stewarding to proclaim themselves an ‘expert’ steward. You’re essentially the human version of a “don’t walk on the grass” sign. It’s a boring, but entirely necessary job.

This whole sorry episode shows that companies seem to think that paying poor people isn’t necessary, and, more disturbingly, that other people are willing to defend that. » Agree or disagree? Would you work for free? letters@tntmagazine.com

BBC COMPLAINERS WANT SERFDOM The BBC received more than 2000 complaints over its One Show-style coverage of the Diamond Jubilee celebrations. The general consensus was that Aunty hadn’t treated the Jubilee with the reverence it deserved.

Sombre presenters were absent, replaced by gurning sycophants, such as the consciously vapid Fearne Cotton, who seems distressingly incapable of experiencing any other emotion than baffled amazement.

However, the BBC was simply trying to make the royals approachable and human.

But what they failed to understand is that

“

Flag-wavers long for secure subservience

”

the flag-waving serfs on the Mall don’t want the Queen to be one of them, they want her to be superior.

Partly for latenly harmless, aspirational reasons, but mainly because lots of people still long for the security of subservience.

And no one wants to be subservient to someone who’s just the same as them.

TNTMAGAZINE.COM

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Charity mission A disabled man’s quest to meet his hero is the latest in a growing movement of social action films WORDS REBECCA KENT

Featuring a rockstar and the attempts of a disabled man to realise a 15-year dream to meet him, Mission To Lars, has Hollywood plot written all over it. But this isn’t a script penned by blockbuster bigwigs; instead, it’s the latest in a trend of social action films, unscripted documentaries raising awareness about issues far outside the mainstream. Mission To Lars also delves into personal relationships as the siblings of the film’s star – Tom Spicer – travel 5000 miles with him from the UK to the US in a quest to meet Metallica drummer Lars Ulrich. It often makes for uncomfortable viewing, leading the audience to question how it would cope in that situation, and how it views disability on the whole. And that’s the point.

Backrolled by donations and a Wellcome Trust grant, all profits from Mission To Lars go to mental health charity Mencap, putting this project firmly among the ranks of documentaries endorsed by the third sector to shine a light on social issues.

Viewers watch how journalist Kate Spicer and her film-maker brother William help Tom, 40, who has the genetic condition Fragile X syndrome, realise his dream.

It emerges they know little about the condition that leads to Tom being hypersensitive to noise, anxious in crowds, uncomfortable out of his routine, and creates problems with his communication.

His siblings – Kate who is in a constant state of fluster trying to arrange a meeting with Ulrich, and Will, who is filming – take him from the comfort zone of his Devon care home (the project threatened to end here when Tom went AWOL) and fly with him to the US, before negotiating thousands of heavy metal fans and the unfamiliar backstage labyrinth of a rock stadium.

For Tom, it’s an immensely challenging undertaking.

The unpredictability makes him nervous, leading to him questioning his commitment to the mission in some touch46

and-go scenes. “From the get-go, we blindly assumed this was going to be a jolly old trip,” Kate says. “It was supposed to be something that could bring us all closer together. But our parents warned us it wasn’t going to be as easy.

“Growing up, I knew Tom as a sibling, someone who I could sort most things out with over a bit of rough and tumble, but I realised I’m clueless as a carer. I guess as children we weren’t so familiar with Tom’s idiosyncrasies.”

“

We used to talk to him like he was an idiot

”

For the siblings, having a charity link became important in terms of how the film, released this month, would be perceived, to contest inevitable charges of exploitation.

“We were well aware that if we hadn’t of made Mission To Lars for charity, then there would be accusations,” Kate, 42, says. “Initially, we didn’t set out to make it a charity film, but it soon became apparent the question was why wouldn’t we? Mencap lobbies the government on disability issues, which made us feel like we were investing in Tom’s future.

“Financially, Tom would never have really profited from the film anyway. His benefits and his even his care could have been withdrawn. However, Will and I, and James [Moore, codirector] may have, and that would have looked pretty bad.”

NGO-supported documentaries are enjoying growing credibility. It seems a perfect marriage: charities can access prominent film-makers, and film-makers get research and funding otherwise difficult to access. Slick productions ensure the world tunes in and all parties flourish.

TNTMAGAZINE.COM

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8/6/12 15:32:31

Photos: Getty; Chris Floyd

Clockwise: Lars Ulrich; The Cove; and backstage with sister Kate

The Oceanic Preservation Society backed 2009 crusading documentary The Cove, which highlighted Japan’s dolphin hunting culture. It scooped an Academy Award for Best Documentary. One of many films Amnesty has given backing to is Erasing David, which follows a man’s attempt to wipe himself from all records to raise awareness of the privacy dangers in our database state. Earlier this year, a online short film about Joseph Kony went viral (see box right).

These movies aren’t just for the viewer, they’re also important for the makers and the subjects. In Mission To Lars, Kate describes a lightbulb moment when the siblings meet an American Fragile X expert who describes the syndrome.

Tom’s relief that someone finally ‘gets’ him is palpable.

“We are sitting in Dr Raundi Hardman’s office and she’s explaining Tom to us, and Tom is just nodding and going ‘finally, someone is telling these two gits what my life is like, thank you Lord!’,” Kate says. “We used to talk to Tom like he was an idiot, unused to listening, really listening, to him.”

Ultimately, the film portrays Tom as a complex and likeable character, not someone defined by his disability. So has Mencap duly achieved its objective?

Mark Goldring, Mencap’s CEO, says: “A lot of Mencap’s work focuses on supporting people with a learning disability to be as involved as possible in ‘mainstream’ society, and to not just be seen as ‘different’, including developing disabled talent on TV. Mission To Lars contributes to this effort.”

Tom’s brother Will, 36, adds: “As well as some universal truths, there’s definitely a strong message of treating people who have learning disabilities as human beings. But we didn’t want to bang that drum. We wanted to be ourselves and go into the film without an agenda, with Tom portrayed as a regular guy doing a regular thing.”

Mission To Lars can be seen in Picturehouse cinemas across London now missiontolars.com

COMING UNDONE EXPOSING THE TRUTH Thanks to savvy production, Kony 2012, a 28-minute film about the plight of African children at the hands of notorious warlord Joseph Kony, was an instant viral success earlier this year .

The video, made by the US charity Invisible Children, attracted some 100 million online views – the most ever for a video – crashing the Kony 2012 website, and turning the world’s attention on the atrocities committed by Kony and his Lord’s Resistant Army.

However, the charity quickly came under fire for oversimplifying a long-standing human rights crisis and elevating Kony (above) to global celebrity status. It was lambasted for advocating Ugandan army intervention, and its lines of funding came into question.

It all became too much for the doco’s director and Invisible Children co-founder Jason Russell, who suffered a very public, very embarrassing meltdown.

TNTMAGAZINE.COM

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SPORTNEWS

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Spurred on: Nelsen

NELSEN CONTINUES AT TOTTENHAM FOOTBALL It appears likely All Whites captain Ryan Nelsen will remain with London’s Tottenham Hotspur after weeks of speculation about his future.

Nelsen will be offered a one-year option on his contract at Spurs, after rumours of a return to DC United were quashed

by Nelsen’s management, who said the defender would be staying in England.

The New Zealander joined Tottenham on the last day of the free agency window at the end of January, but played in only three EPL games, making eight appearances overall for the club.

‘RACISTS SHOULD BE HELPED, NOT SHUNNED’ AFL Collingwood defender Harry O’Brien says he’s more sorry for the supporter who racially abused Joel Wilkinson than the Gold Coast player himself.

Collingwood stripped a fan of his membership for racially vilifying Wilkinson at the MCG last weekend.

O’Brien said he had twice spoken to Nigerian-born Wilkinson and rather than feel anger, the pair both pitied the man.

“I actually feel more sorry for this person who has this level of awareness and acts in that way in public than I do for Joel Wilkinson,” said O’Brien, who has a Brazilian mother and Congolese father.

While he agreed with the suspension of the membership, O’Brien wanted the fan to be educated, rather than excluded.

“We should try to empower them with the required knowledge to function in society without discriminating against others,” he said.

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Pretty in pink: Lingerie Bowl kicked off in Australia last week, causing a ‘for and against’ storm on Twitter, but the girls ignored it all to put on a great show in Brisbane. It now looks like Lingerie Bowl is here to stay. What took so long to dream up the concept?

SHANE CAMERON TO SPAR DAVID HAYE

BIG WEEK FOR ...

BOXING

Never mind the speculation about whether Robin van Persie will head to Juventus or Man City over the summer – this week he captains the Netherlands against arch rivals Germany in may be the game of the Euros group stages (Wed 7.45pm, BBC One). It’s a mouthwatering clash: the Dutch scored nine wins in 10 games during qualifying; the Germans won all 10. Van Persie will play as the lone striker, tasked with penetrating a difficult defensive line and will need all the form that led him to be the standout striker in the EPL this year. Tune in.

New Zealand heavyweight Shane Cameron has set up a three-week camp with former British heavyweight boxing champ David Haye.

“They knew that Shane is a tough guy,” his manager, Ken Reinsfeld, said. “It’s winwin for the Haye camp and us.

“It’s spectacular sparring. You’re talking about a former WBA world champion and contender who is trying to eye up Vitali Klitschko for a title shot.”

Cameron will return home before his showdown with American Monte Barrett at Auckland’s SkyCity on July 5. Haye fights Zimbabwean-born Londoner Dereck Chisora in London on July 14.

TNTMAGAZINE.COM

FINAL 1502 sports NEWS.indd 48

8/6/12 16:56:34

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Queensland captain Cameron Smith celebrates

QUOTES OF THE WEEK People who stay outside the Olympic Village are weird. Why wouldn’t you want to stay with your friends and play dominoes?

Usain Bolt is going to get loose when his racing is over at London 2012. Can’t blame him, really

PREVIEW Blues aim to keep series alive STATE OF ORIGIN GAME TWO WED 10.30AM, SKY SPORTS 1 After such a controversial game one, all eyes will be on the referees for this huge clash in Sydney.

Following a host of NSW complaints over Origin I’s officials, Matt Cecchin and Sean Hampstead were sacked for this match.

Indeed, Blues coach Ricky Stuart was so incensed, he hired an independent analyst who reportedly revealed Queensland went unpunished for 10 incidents that warranted penalties in Melbourne.

But Maroons coach Meninga hit back, saying NSW don’t have the right mentality to prevent his team reaching an unprecedented seven series wins in a row.

“NSW are trying to boost morale by saying they were unlucky,” Meninga said.

“If we get beaten, we just put our hand up and say ‘we should play better’.”

Neutrals will be baying for NSW to square the series, as there’s nothing like an Origin game three that actually means something. Expect more biff, more big hits and, above all, the finest rugby league on the planet – just the way it should be.

It is very easy in England to find a girl who wants to be with you for the wrong reasons Gunners keeper Wojciech Szczesny has no desire to hook up with an English rose

There are too many guys I need to beat up.

I have a moral obligation to get rid of some of the trash UFC middleweight number two Chael Sonnen hoses down talk of retiring after his fight with number one Anderson Silva

TV HIGHLIGHTS

THE CHAT | The incredible Hulk

Photos: Getty

RUGBY is the latest name on Chelsea fans’ lips.

Q Hulk What’s the big deal with this guy? winger Givanildo Vieira de Souza, 25, nicknamed A Brazilian after the Incredible Hulk by his father, has been in scintillating form for FC Porto over the past two seasons. He’s fast, strong and has an extremely powerful left foot. Chelsea will look to play him and Eden Hazard on either side of Fernando Torres in a 4-2-3-1 formation that would also include Juan Mata. But critics say Hulk’s reported £38m pricetag may be too much, that £25m seems fairer. There’s also talk of a weak right leg, that he‘s not eager to help the defence and can be selfish. But check out his assists out on YouTube – it looks as if Torres will be having a ball playing alongside him.

NZ v Ireland Can Ireland make a series of it?

Sat, 8.35am. Sky Sports 2

RUGBY Australia v Wales All the second-Test action Sat, 11am. Sky Sports 2

CRICKET England v West Indies Don’t make him angry

First One Day International Sat, 10.30am. Sky Sports 1 TNTMAGAZINE.COM

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SPORTVIEW

TNT puts the world to rights COMMENT: JAHN VANNISSELROY jahn.vannisselroy@tntmagazine.com

Nick D’Arcy at his court hearing in 2008, and, inset left, with guns

I’m with stupid: swimmers win medal for being dicks

D’Arcy keeps reminding us of why he’s so dislikable in the first place

» What do you reckon? How much of an idiot is Nick D’Arcy? letters@tntmagazine.com 50

We’ve all suffered it, whether on the field ourselves or while watching our favourite team: the curse of the minor infringement, that seemingly insignificant little action that somehow breaks the rules and costs us the game.

But spare a thought for poor old Kiwi freediver Wayne Trubridge, who thought he’d created a new world record after diving 125m below the ocean’s surface on a single breath, only to emerge and be told his efforts didn’t count due a protocol being forgotten on his return.

You see, freediving rules insist that upon breaching the surface, a diver must give an

“

Trubridge was denied by his goggles

”

‘OK’ handsign, say “I’m OK” and remove their goggles and nose clip within 15 seconds. Trubridge gave the OK, but forgot to remove his eyewear and, cruelly, had the dive, in the Bahamas, struck off.

It seems in sporting officialdom further plumbing the depths of ridiculousness, Trubridge was denied a new low of his own.

Photos: Getty; AAP

A country’s Olympic team should be filled with its elite athletic beacons of goodness, those ready to shine a light on their homeland. However, Australia being Australia, they’ve included another specimen, the Olympic-standard idiot.

Dislikable swimmer Nick D’Arcy was always going to be a frontrunner in that section.

In 2008, he bashed fellow swimmer Simon Cowely at a party, leaving the victim requiring facial reconstruction surgery. When D’Arcy appeared in court, he was ordered to pay Cowley $370,000 (£270,000) in costs and damages, but declared himself bankrupt.

Now tired of his ‘I’m a bit dumb, not really sure what’s happening’ pose struck during the course of his court case, D’arcy, who also failed a drug test in 2010, has decided on a new image: the ‘don’t fuck with me, I’m even more dangerous than you thought’ look, usually reserved for posturing hip-hop wannabes. He’s tried out his latest image in a Facebook photo in which he and teammate Kenrick Monk – who wasted police time a couple of years ago by claiming to be the victim of a hit-and-run accident, when he’d simply fallen off his skateboard – brandish some pretty solid-looking firearms.

Why after such high-profile incidents, in which both athletes came across as gutless wimps not prepared to face up to their mistakes, would D’Arcy and Monk appear so glad to flaunt weapons of murder in the lead-up to the Olympics, traditionally an event where nations put aside their differences in the name of sport?

However, the best part is that such actions keep the memories of D’Arcy’s weasley ways in the public consciousness, meaning if he does manage to secure (proper) gold in London, any money made from the ensuing publicity may somehow get channeled to Cowley.

But forget D’Arcy ever being a shining beacon. Even if he wins a medal, he’ll always remain no more than a dull slither of light, serving only to illuminate a warning to others to remember to man up and make good on their errors. And not to be a dickhead.

RECORD ATTEMPT A WASTE OF BREATH

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Testing times Rugby’s mid-year chellenges set the scene for the next four years WORDS TOM STURROCK

Given their struggles against the French over the past decade or so, the All Blacks are probably happy that Les Bleus have stayed at home this winter. But we’ve still got the world’s top five rugby nations going toe-to-toe – poor old Ireland have slipped down the pecking order a little bit.

Last year’s World Cup is long gone but these Tests are the first real hit-out for the southern superpowers since the big tournament – the Home Nations have had a Six Nations to experiment – so, beyond the result, the real interest will be in detecting signs of what’s to come. Who will emerge? What combinations be be pivotal over the next cycle?

Without further ado, this is what we’ll be looking out for during the second weekend of the mid-year Tests.

Australia What we might learn: The Wallabies made some giant strides in the lead-up to the World Cup but there was still a sense that the tournament came a year too soon. So, if all goes according to plan, Robbie Deans’ team are expected to continue on that upward curve as their younger players – he brought in a stack of new faces when he took over as coach – acquire further experience at the highest level. In the continuing absence of Quade Cooper, Berrick Barnes’ needs to deliver at flyhalf.

The man to watch: Dave Pocock has rapidly emerged as one of the world’s best flankers and his ballistic, tireless work has made him a talisman for the Wallabies. He could be the next captain as well, so expect his meteoric rise to continue.

England What we might learn: Their World Cup campaign was a complete shambles but England recovered more successfully than many expected. Martin Johnson didn’t survive, the top job filled instead by Stuart Lancaster, who steered England to an impressive second place in the Six Nations. In the past, 52

England have been guilty of chopping and changing in pursuit of a winning formula – the key for Lancaster will be to pick the young players he believes are capable and give them time to find their feet.

The man to watch: The shoes of Jonny Wilkinson were always going to be hard to fill but Owen Farrell looks like he might be the man to do it. His development at flyhalf will be crucial to England’s chances of building a world-beating side.

Ireland What we might learn: A visit to New Zealand can be a bruising assignment for even the most battle-hardened sides but for an Irish team that failed to impress in the Six Nations, their current trip could be especially unforgiving. Ronan O’Gara and Brian O’Driscoll aren’t getting any younger, so Ireland desperately need some younger players to step up and provide leadership. Irish club sides routinely dominate the Heineken Cup, so there’s undoubtedly some talent there, but the consistency at international level is sometimes lacking. Severe floggings against New Zealand would be bad news and hard to recover from.

The man to watch: Flanker Sean O’Brien starred in Leinster’s Heineken Cup win last month and, at 25, looms as one of the Irishman capable of stepping up and leading the team through to the next World Cup.

New Zealand What we might learn: Well, the All Blacks finally got the monkey off their backs by winning a World Cup. They nearly blew it against France in the final but, given they did it without Dan Carter, it was, overall, a pretty impressive effort.

Steve Hansen is the new coach and it will be intriguing to see how he plans to improve a side that has just achieved the ultimate. Plenty of older heads have decided to play on, but there must surely be a handful of retirements in the next

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Clockwise: Sean O’Brien; Francois Steyn; David Pocock

year or so. How long do the squad’s 30-somethings have left?

Hansen will have one eye on the future.

The man to watch: It’s got to be Dan Carter (main image).

The World Cup was meant to be his crowning achievement, but he missed it through injury. Will he get back to his best?

Can he hang on long enough to play in 2015?

South Africa What we might learn: The Springboks are yet another side who replaced their head coach after the World Cup, the sometimes provocative Peter de Villiers stepping aside as coach, replaced by Heyneke Meyer. It’s probably too much to ask for the Boks, even if they have a new coach, to depart from the dour style of rugby that has become their trademark, but there will likely be some turnover. John Smit, Victor Matfield and Fourie du Preez are gone so the Boks will need to replace that grunt and leadership.

The man to watch: Kicking sensation Francois Steyn has had a tumultuous relationship with South African rugby, dropping in and out as his commitments in France allow.

He’s talented, but can also be a whipping boy for fans.

Needs to show his value this season.

Photos: Getty

Wales What we might learn: Wales are the feel-good story of the northern hemisphere, sweeping to victory in the Six Nations while playing some of the most attractive, innovative rugby around. There are a couple of older heads in the forward pack – as there generally are – but the rest of the side is noticeably youthful, suggesting that this group has a bright future. That said, they need to hold their own against Australia to justify the growing hype.

The man to watch: Giant wing George North has already become a cult figure for Welsh fans and, at age 20, has as much promise as any young player in the game.

UNDER PRESSURE DOUBTS OVER DEANS Australian rugby supremos were chuffed when they poached Robbie Deans from New Zealand but, despite the Wallabies’ improvement, there are plenty in the establishment who reckon they bought a dud.

Certainly, the recent surprise loss to Scotland would have emboldened the knockers, who criticise Deans’ selections – particularly his faith in Berrick Barnes – and his use of substitutes. There is also a complaint that Deans has failed to drill Australia effectively at the breakdown and, although he needed to introduce new faces, the whisper is that some of the older players resent the easy run afforded the young turks.

Another strong showing against Wales this weekend is unlikely to silence the doubters permanently, but a loss would certainly have them gnashing their teeth more noisily than ever.

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Back to The Cinque Terre – Cheers the restored villages After the disastrous floods of last autumn Cinque Terre have a new birth. Stunning coastal path with beautiful Mediterranean flora, crystalline water and hided small beaches are waiting for you!

Trip Highlights: * The illustrious five villages of Monterosso, Vernazza, Corniglia, Manarola and Riomaggiore * Breathtaking views of the emerald blue Mediterranean Sea * Steep terraced hills of olive groves, vineyards and lemon trees * Outstandingly delicious sea food and the famous Trofie al Pesto * Fabulous beaches for swimming Duration: 5 days Price from: ÂŁ 274 Tripcode: ITSW015 Challenge: These walks, though not very long, are moderate to demanding because of the steep hills. Several walks can be shortened. Lodging: In both Monterosso and Bonassola we use comfortable 3 star hotels with a friendly family run atmosphere. All the rooms have private bathrooms, TV mini-bar and hair drier. A good continental breakfast is served each morning. Dinner is only included on the first night in Bonassola (drinks excluded). All the hotels are near to all amenities.

T 0845 8687068 W www.s-cape.eu 54

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TRAVEL LATE DEALS | HOTSHOTS | TRAVEL TIPS | TOP FIVE | TOURS | BIG TRIP IMAGE OF THE WEEK

FIRE IN THE SKY A torchbearer holds the Olympic Flame aloft on the Giant’s Causeway in County Antrim, Northern Ireland. The Olympic Flame travels a total of 8000 miles over its 70-day relay.

Photos: Getty, TNT

INSIDE

BEER SCENE /62

AN EDUCATION /72

THE BEAT GOES ON /78

Unlikely as it may seem, Derby has been named a must-see this year as Britain’s first city for ale. We try being a brewer for a day.

Think museums can be stuffy? See some of Europe’s stranger cultural collections, from cocks to condoms and currywurst.

Explore the northern state of Bahia to feel the Afro-Brazilian rhythm in Salvador, plus find a lost world with boob-shaped rocks.

TNTMAGAZINE.COM

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TRAVELDIARY Laura Chubb

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Summer Solstice: enjoy loony-spotting

ACTING TRAVEL EDITOR

DULL & BORING The news that the Scottish village of Dull is to be twinned with the US community of Boring has raised a smile among most, but the move deserves admiration, too.

SUMMER SOLSTICE Stonehenge The summer solstice as celebrated at Stonehenge is a night and dawn of peace, love and quality loon-spotting opportunities. Neo-druids, 20-21 pagans and general New Age types don their glad rags (and, in some cases, fake beards) to watch the sun rise on this long day of summer. All-night celebrations help revellers stay awake until dawn.

JUNE

WHY: An important date for pagans, the summer solstice festival dates back thousands of years. It celebrates the longest day of the year, when the sun is at its maximum elevation. About 20,000 people flock to prehistoric Stonehenge to see it in as atmospherically as possible each year.

PASADENA CHALK FESTIVAL

english-heritage.org.uk

BIG FIVE MARATHON

South Africa

Paseo Colorado, California You’ll run with zebras and giraffes during this 23 exceptionally set marathon, making the pain all the more worthwhile. Make no mistake, running up and down valleys and over rock faces is tough, but the views are (probably) worth it. Tour packages throw in game drives and safari lodges.

JUNE

Thousands of spectators turn up to this annual festival to 16-17 enjoy chalk art as it’s etched on to the streets. Hundreds of artists from across southern California show off their skills on the sidewalk, while live music keeps everyone entertained.

JUNE

pasadenachalkfestival.com

EASTERN NATURIST GATHERING Pennsylvania, US

big-five-marathon.com

ST PETERSBURG TATTOO FESTIVAL St Petersburg, Russia

This week marks the annual gathering of east coast 11-17 nudists, who converge to take classes such as ‘male pelvis wellness’ and ‘cross un-dressing’.

Don’t miss the ‘slip n’ slide’ event.

JUNE

naturistsociety.com

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DO IT BECAUSE: It’s one of the few opportunities to get close to the stones, as English Heritage provides open access especially for the occasion. Be aware that only small amounts of booze are permitted per person and that camping is not allowed.

Together with appreciating the best in body art, this fest 15-17 presents “extreme-piercing shows, strips shows and freak shows”.

Be very afraid.

JUNE

tattoo-festival.ru

Photos: Getty

Plenty of towns have not been so savvy when it comes to bearing the burden of an unfortunate name. That these Dull villagers have been good-humoured and forward-thinking enough to make the best of the situation will likely reap rewards – tourists after the perfect snap of a sign that declares ‘Welcome to Dull, twinned with Boring’ could make this 84-person town some sweet cash. No wonder the Boring Community Planning Organisation also voted in favour of the hook-up.

It makes you wonder why more oddly named towns don’t try to leverage their monikers, rather than endure them with a bashful bow of the head. I hear that it’s almost impossible to find Sugar Tit, South Carolina, these days, as most signs announcing the crossroads community have been taken down. Only one blink-and-you’llmiss-it sign of Sugar Tit remains, apparently, just outside the larger community of Greer.

I have a list of favourite bizarrely named roads and towns that really ought to bring more attention to themselves, as opposed to hiding out in the shadows, ashamed of their oddness. The Land of Green Ginger, a street in Hull, makes this much-maligned port town seem more interesting, surely. Dildo in Canada’s Newfoundland should shrug off its embarrassment and invite us all round for tea, so we can see exactly what this historical Dildo (established in 1711) has to offer.

And Titty Ho in Northamptonshire has nothing to lose.

So come on Sugar Tits! Show us what you’ve got.

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TIBET IS CLOSED The Chinese authorities have closed Tibet to foreign tourists, it is reported. Several Beijingbased tour operators claim the Chinese tourism bureau has asked them to stop taking travellers into Tibet, probably owing to recent unrest. An employee at the Tibet China International Tour Service told AFP: “The tourism bureau asked us to stop organising foreign groups to Tibet in late May. We don’t know when they will lift the ban.” The reported prohibition on foreign visitors comes after two Tibetans set fire to themselves outside the Jokhang temple in Lhasa, a major tourist site.

Photos: Thinkstock

MID-FLIGHT FRIGHT A Monarch plane had to be diverted en route to Majorca after a passenger’s hair was set alight mid-flight in a stag party prank. A 24-year-old from Widnes was arrested on suspicion of endangering an aircraft after the plane made an emergency landing in Gatwick, having taken off from Manchester. Detecting smoke from singed hair, the pilot made the decision to land, although nobody was hurt. A spokesman for the airline said: “Monarch has a zero tolerance approach to disruptive passengers on board.”

GOING SOFT? Creepy news alert: Thomson Airways is introducing a check-in process for young passengers’ cuddly toys so that tots’ favoured companions don’t become lost. Soft toys can be registered prior to flying and are even issued with a special boarding pass. Gatwick Airport’s lost property department is bombarded with up to 30 misplaced cuddly animals every month, it is reported, hence Thomson’s bright idea. Is it just us, or is this whole thing unbearably urgh-worthy?

DANA AIR DENIED Nigerian airline Dana Air has been grounded by the Nigerian Civil Aviation Authority after one of its planes crashed into a densely populated area north of Lagos, killing all 153 people on board.

According to reports, a Dana Air plane made an emergency landing in early May after a “loss of hydraulic pressure”, although it’s not known whether this was the same craft that crashed.

A spokesman told the BBC: “Their operational licence has been suspended until we carry out their recertification.”

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Derventio brewery: prettier than your average

EAT, DRINK, SLEEP

Derby

For modern British grub, a relaxed atmosphere and superb service, you can’t do better than The Wonky Table on Sadler Gate. Mains from £9.95. wonkytable.co.uk

DERBY

ENGLAND

ENGLAND LONDON

GETTING THERE Tickets from London St Pancras direct to Derby start from £25 return with East Midlands.

National Express runs a coach from London Victoria with a return ticket starting from £9. eastmidlandstrains.co.uk nationalexpress.com

Derby’s Cathedral Quarter is the most picturesque part of the town centre, and in the middle is Jack Rabbits deli. Brilliant butties start at £2.50. jackrabbitskitchen.co.uk Rowditch Inn is a great traditional pub. Pints from £2.20. (246 Uttoxeter Road) The walls of the Exeter Arms are laden with Derby memorabilia and the locals are as welcoming as you’ll find.

There’s a great selection of Derby’s microbrewery beers on offer, as well as live bands at the weekend and good solid pub grub. Pints from £2.10 exeterarms.co.uk The newly built Hampton

by Hilton is great for a weekend stay. Lovely rooms, good breakfast, and more than reasonably priced, from £23pppn. hamptoninn.hilton.co.uk

Get mashed: being a brewer for a day 58

The Rangemoor Park Hotel is a quaint, budget hotel providing ensuite rooms in the heart of Derby from £20pppn.

Includes free wifi. rangemoorparkhotel.co.uk

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UKTRIP

Beer scene Unlikely as it may seem, Derby has been named a must see this year as Britain’s first city for ale

Photos: Oliver Jones / TNT Images

WORDS OLI JONES

As I cross the bridge over the River Derwent to the Darley Abbey Mills, the water washing over the weir, the mallards shining in the sun on the bank, I’m able to forgive the 7am start necessitated to get me here for my day as a brewer.

Darley Abbey is a preposterously picturesque village on the outskirts of Derby. The Good Beer Guide recently named Derby Britain’s “first city for beer” and Lonely Planet proclaimed it a “must see” thanks to the outstanding array of real ales and pubs. One of the Derby brew scene’s more notable success stories is that of the Derventio brewery, run by two-man team Pete Nash and John Baddock. Thankfully the brewery here is far from the industrial plant I had envisaged, set on the basement floor of a largely disused wing of the red brick six-storey cotton mill, built in 1783.

Pete, my guide for the day, doles out the bacon butties, as he begins to describe what’s in store for us. Happily, rather than standing around and watching like a lemon, it sounds as though there’s plenty of work ahead. Pete is one of those preternaturally charming people – the perfect tour guide, he doesn’t bludgeon you with information, but imparts it as part of a bucolic narrative. He deftly switches between explaining the brewing process to a relative noob like me, to talking specifics and suggesting home brew solutions to my fellow tour-goers.

After a pleasantly tiring morning shovelling malts out of the mash tun – the first step in the brewing process, when the sugars, which will later become alcohol, are extracted from the malts – lunch is dished up on the banks of the Derwent. Our handmade sandwiches are accompanied by a selection of Derventio’s bottled brews. The tasting is little short of a revelation. The breadth and intricacy of the ale is something to be marvelled at and perfectly accompanies the simple butties and cake.

In the afternoon, while our brew chugs away in the hopper, Pete fills the time with a tour of the disused mill, a Unesco World Heritage site. It’s a spooky journey through the building’s industrial past. Each floor is littered with the mill’s historical detritus: alongside a petrified pigeon skeleton, we find 19th-century cotton spindles and a Fantastic Four comic from 1964, left to gather dust.

My day as a brewer concludes as we transfer our Gorgon brew to a fermenting vat, at which point it dawns on me

for the first time that people will actually drink the beer we’ve been making, something that strikes me as vaguely implausible, and peculiarly affirming. After a quick rest it’s time to put my new-found knowledge to use – with a pub crawl of Derby’s best boozers.

Local entrepreneur (and former frontman of lost punk rock gem Anti-Pasti) Martin Roper formalised a tour of Derby’s best boozers in January. We meet in Derby’s QUAD square, before heading to possibly the city’s most famous boozer, Mr Grundy’s, which houses an on-site microbrewery.

Pub tours are always slightly difficult, in that they can

“

The intricacy of the ale is little short of a revelation

”

peeve the locals if not done tactfully, but thankfully Roper seems to know almost everyone. The tour takes in six pubs, with a half pint of local real ale served up in each.

After a tour of Grundy’s brewery, we head to the The New Zealand Arms: the first pub opened by new Derby brewery, the Dancing Duck. I sample its Gold IPA, which is a citrusy delight, while my friend waxes lyrical over her chocolately stout. The next pub, The Falstaff, is very much a local, dripping with character, in the form of Doctor Who memorabilia, a life-sized mounted knight sculpture, and reallife pub wench, dressed in full period garb. The night gets a little hazy from here on in, but as we stumble out of the Exeter Arms, the last pub on the crawl,, our sceptiscim of lofty proclamations made about the virtues of Derby’s real ale scene have been utterly banished.

The locals are lovely, the grub simple and effective, and the beer brilliant.

NEXT WEEK

Real ale tour £29pp realalederby.com Be a brewer for a day £30pp derventiobrewery.co.uk

Cairngorms: Worldclass adventure in Scotland

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LATEDEALS

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Sail away: eight-day tour for £229pp with Sail Croatia

DEAL OF THE WEEK

£154

BARCELONA Two nights in Barcelona is £154pp with easyJet Holidays (0843 1041000; holidays. easyjet.com). Includes four-star, B&B accommodation and flights from London Gatwick. Departs July 3.

< £250

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LANZAROTE Seven nights in Lanzarote is £324pp with easyJet Holidays (holidays.easyjet.com; 0843 1041000). Includes all-inclusive accommodation and flights from London Gatwick. Departs June 28.

MOROCCO A 10-day tour is £379pp (save £200pp) with Travel Talk (0208 0998852; traveltalktours.com). Visiting Marrakech, Sahara, Casablanca, Fes, and more. Includes four-star accommodation, some meals, tour guides, camel trek, and more. Excludes flights and local payment. Book by June 24; departs June 30.

EGYPT Two six-day Pharaoh’s Adventure tours are being offered for the price of one (£299) with On the Go (020 73711113; onthegotours.com). Includes B&B accommodation and guides. Visiting Cairo and Luxor. Excludes flights.

Departs July 24 and August 5.

> £500 EGYPT & JORDAN A 16-day tour is now £639pp (save £250pp) with Travel Talk (0208 0998852; traveltalktours.com). Visiting Cairo, Giza, Pyramids, Sphinx, Wadi Rum, Petra, Dead Sea and more. Includes accommodation, some meals, Nile cruise, guide and more. Excludes flights and local payment. Book by June 24; departs June 30, July 14 and 28.

VIETNAM & CAMBODIA A 15-day tour is £1023pp with On the Go (onthegotours.com; 020 73711113).

Includes B&B accommodation, some meals, transport and guides. Excludes flights. Departs July 21.

MALAYSIA A 10-night trip to Kuala Lumpur and Penang is £899pp with Flight Centre (0844 8008624; flightcentre.co.uk) quoting reference 2347683. Includes return international and internal flights and accommodation. Book by June 30; valid for travel throughout September 2012.

DAILY TRAVEL DEALS GO TO tntmagazine.com/travel/latedeals where new travel deals are updated daily.

There are more than 30 deals live at any time. Also sign up for TNT’s weekly travel newsletter, which will be emailed to you every Wednesday with the most up-to-date deals and guides to over 170 destinations.

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Photos: Thinkstock

VENICE Three nights in Venice is £169pp with Travelbag (0871 7034240; travelbag.co.uk).

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SAIL CROATIA An eight-day Sail Split-Dubrovnik-Split tour is now £229pp (save £400) with Travel Talk (traveltalktours.com; 0208 0998852). Visiting Split, Makarska, Trstenik, Dubrovnik, Mljet, Korcula and Hvar. Includes seven nights on a private boat, some meals and guide. Excludes flights, port tax and local payment.

Book by June 24; departs July 7.

AMSTERDAM Two nights in Amsterdam is £250pp (0800 1116271; lowcostholidays.com).

Includes four-star, B&B accommodation and flights from London Southend.

Departs June 26.

EGYPT A nine-day Felucca Odyssey tour is now £144pp (save 50 per cent) with Travel Talk (0208 0998852; traveltalktours.com).

Visiting Cairo, Giza, Pyramids, Sphinx, and more. Includes accommodation, some meals, guides and more. Excludes flights, excludes local payment. Book by June 17; departs June 16, 23, and 30.

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RUTH ROXANNE BOARD

HOTSHOTS WINNER

Talks travel photography

THE BIRDS James Martin, Wimbledon, UK

WHY IT WORKS The roadside puddle has created a dream-like reflection of the world above it. The birds float wistfully just off-centre of the shot, disappearing between the fence and the tarmac road. The mirror image is interrupted by the detritus on the surface of the water creating an alternative version of reality.

What would normally be ignored as a muddy puddle has been transformed into a graceful and serene scene reminiscent of an inky Japanese watercolour.

RUNNER-UP BABY, YOU’RE A FIREWORK Nicole Moody, Melbourne, Australia

WHY IT WORKS A firework display has been captured at just the right moment. Mid-explosion, the sparks look like gigantic flowers blooming in the night sky.

You can imagine the bang, but there is no sound. This split second, normally gone in a flash, will last forever.

RUNNER-UP

WINNER HOT TIPS: The rule of thirds Known as one of the most fundamental laws of photography, the rule of thirds can help you to balance the composition of your shots.

Start by mentally splitting your image into nine equal sections with three equidistant lines through both the horizontal and the vertical aspects. Your camera may even do this for you on your LCD screen. Where the lines intersect is where the points of interest

should lay in the image. This will leave you with a more balanced picture and help the viewer interact more naturally with the shot.

Once you’ve mastered the rule, have a go at breaking it. It won’t necessarily mean that your images will be unbalanced and boring – quite the opposite. Challenging a rule can be a creative, liberating experience – one that ultimately leads to better shots.

A THREE DAY TOUR OF SCOTLAND AND A PHOTOGRAPHY COURSE

WIN

Upload your images to tntmagazine.com/hotshots First prize is a three-day tour of Scotland for two worth £218 from Haggis Adventures (haggisadventures.com). Must be taken within three months of receiving prize letter. The runner-up wins a £60 photography course voucher from Nigel Wilson Photography (photographycourses.org.uk).

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TOP FIVE

ROAD TRIPS

CHECKING IN

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PACIFIC COAST HIGHWAY, CALIFORNIA

Stunning views

LA SULTANA OVERVIEW Incongruously tucked away at the end of a cobbled street, La Sultana is an oasis of tranquility in the non-stop city of Marrakech. Set out over five differently themed riads, the decor inside this Tardis-like property is all about extravagance.

Laze in one of the pools, relax in the hammam (Turkish bath) in the spa, or head to the roof terrace to gape at hard-to-beat views of the vast Atlas Mountains. Shut off the noise and heat of the outside world and chill out. The hotel is just a fiveminute walk from the hubbub of the medina, when you’ve got your breath back.

WOW FACTOR The decor inside the hotel – which is a member of the Great Hotels Of The World Luxury Collection – is akin to a royal palace.

There are ostentatious chandeliers dotted all over the place as well as gigantic marble columns which wouldn’t look out of place in the home of a Greek goddess. There is also an abundance of antiques and artefacts at every turning around the maze-like corridors.

ROOMS Each one of the 28 rooms is uniquely designed and boast indulgent zelige-patterned tiled, stand-alone bathtubs.

BILL PLEASE Prestige rooms start from £217pn. Pricey, but totally worth it.

403 Rue de Ka kasbah, Kasbah, Medina, Marrakech, Morocco ghotw.com/la-sultana

00 64

The road trip is a cultural touchstone of 20th and 21st century society, a concept so familiar you could even argue it’s a genre of (classic) film – Easy Rider, Thelma & Louise … er, Britney Spears in Crossroads? Crucially, the ethos of the road trip is exactly how TNT likes to travel – striking out in search of adventure, fresh experiences and new friends.

Our number one pick, therefore, has to take in the country that arguably invented the notion of the road trip as it is generally accepted today.

Thanks to the US of A, that means you better pack your potato chips, practise swerving off the road and ploughing into desert to lose the police car that’s tailing you, and hole up in a series of increasingly bleak motels.

The Pacific Coast Highway is everything you could ask from the all-American road trip – a twisting, cliffbordered beauty that covers 123 miles from Monterey to Morro Bay. En route, you’ll pass through gorgeous village Carmel-by-the-Sea, Point Lobos State Reserve (a tree-clad headland with

underwater ecological reserve, great for diving), and the unapologetically dramatic Big Sur, a 90-mile stretch of wild natural beauty comprising ragged rocks and groves of giant redwoods.

In Big Sur, you’ll see the Bixby Bridge (pictured), one of the most photographed features of all the west coast. After that, motor on to the Julia Pfeiffer Burns State Park, for 3000fthigh ridges, whale watching and hiking to the McWay Falls, which pour 80ft into a scenic cove.

You know you’ve reached Morro Bay when you see its landmark Morro Rock, a huge lump of volcanic stone said to be about 23 million years old.

Perhaps recommending it more than the stops along the way, however, is the act of simply driving this route.

The views from your window will be nothing short of spectacular, as the almost cerulean sea crashes onto the cliffs that hem the highway. Don’t forget to soak up some R&R on California’s picture-perfect beaches as you go. visitcalifornia.com

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BERGEN TO OSLO, NORWAY

An 800-mile round trip is the way to see the very best of Norway, taking in gorgeous greenery inland from Bergen to Oslo, and returning along the coast.

A highlight is the Atlantic Road from Kristiansund, linking small coastal communities over eight bridges that curve across the water. Travel during autumn to see stormy seas pounding the road. You’ll also pass through Stavanger on your way back to Bergen, the country’s top spot for surfing. visitnorway.com

Photos: Thinkstock, Getty

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ROAD TRIPS

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ROUTE 40, ARGENTINA

At more than 5000km long, this is an epic road trip for an epic country.

Starting at party town Salta in the north, the route follows the snowcapped Andes, winds through Tampaya National Park in La Rioja, with its incredible red rock formations and dinosaur fossils, and happily hiccups into the heart of Argentina’s wine industry in Mendoza. Pack a sense of adventure – and, considering the distance, perhaps a cushion for your butt – for the road trip of a lifetime. argentinaturistica.com

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TOP FIVE

AMALFI COAST, ITALY

So picturesque is the Amalfi Coast, it was awarded Unesco World Heritage status in 1997.

Begin a road trip in Salerno and weave your way towards Ravello, providing a glut of gorgeous views of the coast from its idyllic gardens. Then skip through pricey Amalfi and spy the green waters at Grotta dello Smeraldo, followed by the Vallone di Furore gorge, before parking up at Sorrento. amalfiscoast.com

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BASQUE COUNTRY, SPAIN

Travel from Bilbao and take in the best of the Basque Country, sneaking into France for a 300-mile round trip drive across the rooftop of Europe.

From Bilbao, head to Pamplona and through the Pyrenees into France, taking the high mountain Roncesvalles pass (famous for a historic battle in 778 which saw the Basque tribes beat Charles The Great). Once in the foothills you’ll swing by surf mecca Biarritz, then head west back to Bilbao with a view of the Bay of Biscay.

NEXT WEEK World’s coolest castles: From Slovenia to Syria

basquecountry-tourism.com

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READERS’ TIPS

YOU ASKED FOR IT...

LAURA LINDSAY FROM LONELY PLANET

girlfriend and I are looking for Q My a short break in the UK this summer but have previously visited Devon, Cornwall, Dorset and the Cotswolds. Where can we go this year that’s different? Carl, via email

like to take a short budget break Q I’d to France, but I don’t want to drive too far once I’ve arrived. Where would you recommend for a short break in northern France this summer? Lisa, via email makes a perfect summer A Normandy break, plus there are a number of Channel

comfort zone, the furthest north of England.

Northumberland has some of the best beaches in the UK, if not Europe, and although the temperatures may not be Mediterranean, the gorgeous scenery is a worthy consolation.

Top coastal top picks include Druridge Bay, a gorgeous, sweeping sandy beach perfect for a sunny day. Next up, head to the stunning beach at Bamburgh – even in high season, the miles of golden sand here aren’t crowded.

A quirky coastal spot further south is Marsden Grotto, an ex-smugglers’ cove in the hollowed cliff accessible only by lift and now a bar and restaurant (marsden-grotto.co.uk).

Just a few miles north of Bamburgh is Holy Island (Lindisfarne), a small island connected to the mainland by a narrow causeway. Then, head inland to Alnwick for some history and a pinch of Hollywood. Alnwick Castle provided the setting for Harry Potter’s Hogwarts School in the blockbuster films.

Finally, get outdoors and walk part of the 84-mile Hadrian’s Wall Path, which runs from Wallsend (18 miles south of Morpeth) to Bowness-on-Solway along the line of the ancient Roman wall.

crossings that arrive into various ports here.

If you arrive into Caen by ferry from Portsmouth, it’s about a one-hour drive southwest to one of France’s most iconic sights, Mont St Michel. The abbey-topped island connected to the mainland by a narrow causeway is a great day trip. On your second day, why not try out the Route de Cidre (around 20km from Caen). This rural trail through hedgerows and orchards takes you past a number of traditional cider producers who are happy to show you their farms and sell their cider and calvados.

Next up, be sure to squeeze in a trip to the pretty harbour town of Honfleur, a pictureperfect seaside stretch of cafes, ice cream shops and yachts bobbing in the harbour. If you have a third day, head inland to Giverny and the garden of impressionist artist Monet. It’s a bargain at £7.50 entry to see those worldfamous water lilies (fondation-monet.fr).

A great base for your trip is Trouville-sur-mer, a perfect seaside resort located centrally to all of these sights, just 60km from Caen. Stay at La Maison Normande, a cute and reasonably priced hotel near the seafront (maisonormande.com).

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BAG A SWEET RIDE When hiring a car in LA or Las Vegas, book the cheapest one. Then, on pick up, ask if there are any upgrade options. We booked a compact for US$30 a day for 10 days, and on pick up got an upgrade to a Mustang convertible for an extra US$8 a day!

Jason Metcalf, via Facebook

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This is a reader forum — TNT and Lonely Planet accepts no responsibility for any loss, injury or inconvenience sustained by anyone using the information provided.

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a southern bias here, so I’m A There’s going to suggest something out of your

STICKY SITUATION TIP On holiday, save yourself OF THE the time and frustration WEEK spent finding addresses for your postcards. Pre-print labels of your friends’ and families’ addresses so you can stick them straight on. All you have to do is peel them off and stick.

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Send us a horizontal photo of yourself with a copy of TNT from anywhere around the world and, if we print it, you’ll win a trip for two to Bath and Stonehenge with Anderson Tours, valued at £104! » Email your pictures to ontheroad@ tntmagazine.com along with your name, where you’re from and where the photo was taken, or see tntmagazine.com/world.

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THE HIGHLANDS, SCOTLAND Julia Colwill, from Australia

BEST / WORST TRIP

THE TRAVELLER

NIKKY HOULIHAN, 24

JOSE CARLOS, 23

Dublin, Ireland

Celaya, Mexico

BEST I was in Beijing, none of the buses were running, and I was staying 45 minutes outside of the city. A lovely guy gave me a ride on his motorbike and even let me listen to Chinese pop music on his iPod.

Essential travel item?

My sister always makes me a list of things I should do wherever I go. On my list for London is drinking in the pub while watching a football game, and going to Buckingham Palace.

Scariest travel experience?

I’m from Mexico and am here on a study trip.

When I arrived, the airport officials couldn’t believe that I was studying medicine in Mexico and kept harassing me about where I was staying while in Britain.

WORST I ate jellyfish by mistake. When I asked the woman at the cafeteria what it was, she would only say it was meat and refused to tell me from which animal. It was all sticky and tangy. » Tell us your best/worst trips, email laura.chubb@tntmagazine.com

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SPLASHING OUT

ROBINSON CRUSOE ADVENTURE Ever fancied staying on a private island in the Caribbean, then sailing around the settings for Robert Louis Stevenson’s Robinson Crusoe? This is luxury at its best.

The Robinson Crusoe package is US$4916 (about £3036) with Peter Island Resort & Spa. Includes seven nights’ accommodation, meals, snorkelling, champagne picnic and more. peterisland.com

THE INSIDER

JILL KAMMER Owner worldwide-accom.com

My first ever big trip was New York City. I will never forget that feeling of being there for the first time – it was like being transported right into the TV shows I’d grown up watching. I’ve never been able to capture that feeling again.

My most challenging travel experience was relocating to Italy in 2008 and living in a hotel while we searched for a rental. We thought we would never get out of that room.

My favourite place in the world is Venice. It’s so mysterious, has incredible beauty and being on the water gives such a feeling of calm. I travel to Venice at least twice a year.

The next trip on my travel wishlist is Greece. Now may be the best time.

My guilty travel pleasure is plane food on a long-haul flight.

Seriously. I learned a long time ago to order vegan, as the meals are most often Asian and more effort seems to have gone into producing them.

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Erotic art: admire a world-class collection in Amsterdam.

Far bottom left: an elephant phallus in Iceland, of course [Caption]

Weird museums EUROPE

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Fragonard’s ‘flayed figures’ in Paris. Left, top to bottom: the devil in Lithuania and a history of contraceptive coils in Vienna

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SHORTBREAK

An education Think museums can be stuffy? See some of Europe’s stranger cultural collections, from cocks and condoms to currywurst WORDS LAURA CHUBB

The likes of the Louvre and the Guggenheim might be mustsees, but if you’re looking for a museum to expand your smile over your mind, try these oddities for size.

Phallological Museum, Reykjavik With more than 280 penises on display, this collection in Reykjavik is an impressive ode to the love muscle. Cocks from a wide range of land and sea mammals – whales, seals, polar bears, even homo sapiens – jut out of the walls, recline resplendently in display cases and, in some instances, are squashed unkindly into jars. Odder still, founder Sigurður Hjartarson proclaims that his (purely scientific) interest in the phallus first began when he was given a pizzle as a child. A pizzle is a bull’s penis. The museum also promises, somewhat ominously, “the collection of about 300 artistic oddments and other practical utensils related to the museum´s chosen theme”. phallus.is

Avanos Hair Museum, Cappadocia This incredibly creepy accumulation of women’s hair, adorning the walls and hanging from the ceiling of a cave in Turkey’s Central Antolia, was curated by potter/ oddball Galip Körükçü. He began the project in 1979 and today has 16,000 hair samples donated by willing ladies. Körükçü’s efforts have earned him a Guinness World Record. chez-galip.com

for the bottle that contains the tears cried by a spurned lover). brokenships.com

Museum of Contraception and Abortion, Vienna This delightful ‘attraction’ in the Austrian capital explores the destruction of the “natural bond” between sexuality and reproduction – without judgement or adopting a specific position, it insists. Take a tour of scary-looking abortion instruments and tummy-turning body models that show the dangers of backstreet terminations. If you’re still holding on to your lunch, check out the collection of contraceptive coils, the history of vaginal rinsing and potential future plans for birth control. en.muvs.org

Fragonard Vet Museum, Paris Yet more medical curiosities can be found among the astonishing collection at this hidden gem behind the Veterinary School of Maisons-Alfort. Devoted to the study of human and animal anatomy, you’ll see two-headed lambs, a cyclops colt and real cadavers that have been skinned ››

Currywurst Museum, Berlin Everyone knows the Germans love their sausage, but did you know this pork lust extends to an entire museum devoted to currywurst? The popular dish, made from steamed pork sausage coated in thick curry ketchup, was first hawked on the streets of Berlin in the Fifties. Today’s exhibit claims to take you on a sensory journey through the best of the wurst, taking in sniffing stations and a mock sausage stand, which you can get behind and experience what it would feel like to serve the snack. Wowzers. currywurstmuseum.de

Museum of Broken Relationships, Zagreb This cheery venue in Croatia displays the detritus of failed love affairs, offering comfort to those whose own relationships have ended. There are more than 700 objects donated from all over the world, from standard keepsakes such as teddy bears and jewellery, to the more unusual (look

Go Dutch: for several floors of erotica TNTMAGAZINE.COM

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MORE WEIRD MUSEUMS AN EDUCATION OUTSIDE EUROPE Get a close look

Love gone wrong in Croatia and dissected to expose their organs. Eighteenth-century anatomist Honoré Fragonard got particularly creative with some of his ‘flayed figures’ – don’t miss the skinned man riding a flayed horse, surrounded by human foetuses riding animal foetuses. musee.vet-alfort.fr

Erotic Museum, Amsterdam This extensive exploration of erotica is set over several floors in an old 17th-century warehouse. Along with an exhibit about the history of Amsterdam’s Red Light District, there’s a collection of erotic art from all over the world, a display of rather frightening condoms and a dirty version of Disney’s Snow White And The Seven Dwarves. amsterdam.info/museums/erotic-museum

Devil’s Museum, Kaunas We have renowned Lithuanian painter Antanas Žmuidzinavicius to thank for this sinister assembly, comprising about 3000 images of the devil. Žmuidzinavicius collected sculptures and carvings of the Dark Lord as a hobby, and upon his death in 1966, a memorial museum was established at his home. The museum outgrew the house thanks to donations from visitors, and has since moved to more official lodgings. Go for an insight into the concept of the devil within cultures across the globe. muziejai.lt

Medieval Criminal Museum, San Gimignano

Thought the Europeans were weird? Try these atypical archives further afar.

Sulabh International Museum of Toilets The magnificent Red Fort and 25,000-capacity Jama Masjid mosque in Delhi are all well and good, but one sight you really must not miss is this toilet museum. Cataloguing the historical and aesthetic evolution of toilets with a comprehensive display, you’ll learn that the crapper is, as the curator claims, “a critical chapter in the growth of civilisation”. sulabhtoiletmuseum.org Parasite Museum A 30ft tapeworm pulled out of a woman who ate some bad sushi is the jewel in the disturbing crown of this Tokyo museum, boasting a collection of 300 different types of parasite. Treat yourself to a souvenir keyring with a dead specimen trapped inside. kiseichu.org Burnt Food Museum Feel better about your culinary abilities with a visit to the Burnt Food Museum. Even better, you don’t have to leave the sofa to check out the exhibits – just visit the website for a bemusing journey through charred chow. Boston-based curator Deborah Henson-Conant gives private tours of the museum outside of cyberspace, but as they cost US$500 a pop and she looks a bit unhinged, we’d stick with the virtual option. Fun fact: there is an official Burnt Food Museum harpist. burntfoodmuseum.com

Amid the sublime Tuscan countryside, this grisly gallery of medieval torture devices will make you overwhelmingly glad for the fact you’re living in the here and now. Aside from the collection of iron maidens and spiky chairs, the museum seeks to create a discussion on human rights. And thus, as well as pondering the exact usage of the ‘heretic fork’, you can mull over torture through the ages as a dastardly device of authority. torturamuseum.com

Carrot Museum, Berlotte

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Anyone order a currywurst?

Photos: TNT, Getty

We can only assume that the people of Berlotte in Belgium have been swigging a glass too many of their homeland’s exceptional ale. How else would you explain this incredibly silly museum, which is too small to even enter? Instead, visitors peer through a window in a historic electricity tower, and turn a wheel that operates a conveyor belt, which then moves an array of carrot-centric exhibits (carrot necklaces, carrots) in front of their very eyes. Find it by keeping an eye out for the carrot clock and carrot weather vane decorating the tower. ❚ TNTMAGAZINE.COM

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TRAVELWEEKENDER

Lion City This is Singapore in 48 hours WORDS LAURA CHUBB

DAY 1: 09:00 Though it has a reputation for being somewhat sterile, thanks to its blanket ban on sinful behaviour such as chewing gum and the alarming surfeit of shopping malls, Singapore is a mosaic of cultures (Chinese, Malay, Indian, Western) that is vividly present in the architecture, art and food of the city state. To prove it, start your day in Little India (southern end of Serangoon Rd), a million miles from Singapore’s famed uniformity. Explore the cramped little shops, breathe in the intense aromas, and pick up a fried chapatti from a street stall for breakfast.

10:00 Challenge the stereotypes further with a hike around the MacRitchie Reservoir, at the centre of the 2000-hectare Central Catchment Nature Reserve (nparks.gov.sg).

There’s a 12km route, or a series of shorter trails to choose from, providing a scenic escape from urbanity with tangled greenery and whooping monkeys.

14:00 Singapore’s hybrid heritage is perhaps most keenly felt in the food, for which it is rightly famous. We recommend you forget the five-star fine-dining and find a hawker centre for lunch. These open-air complexes are thronging with food stalls serving up great street fare at budget prices. If you don’t mind a bit of a journey, try Changi Village (Loyang Ave Changi 4, Tampines Central 5) for its renowned hawker centre by the bus terminus. The village atmosphere makes for a particularly pleasant pause.

16:00 That’s enough of all that peaceful lark. Now pound the pavement at Orchard Road, Singapore’s shopping centre mecca. Alongside the consumerist frenzy are plenty of bars for refreshment.

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18:00 Live the cliché and head to Raffles (raffles.com) for a Singapore Sling. Built in 1887, the world-famous hotel is an exemplary example of colonial architecture, and the best place to sip the signature drink.

20:00 Check your pulse and fill your belly at the Imperial Herbal Restaurant (1 Harbourfront Walk; imperialherbal.com). The in-house Chinese physician gives you a check-up and prescribes a particular meal to satisfy body and soul. Be careful not to piss off the prescriber – there is scorpion on the menu.

22:00 Treat yourself to some decadence Singapore-style and head to Marina Bay Sands (marinabaysands.com). The luxury resort is home to the world’s largest atrium casino, with an astonishing 500 tables primed to pilfer your money.

In keeping with Singapore’s hard line on vice, Singapore citizens and permanent residents are charged SG$100 (about £50) to enter the casino in order to discourage gambling, but tourists are admitted for free.

22:00 It’s probably best not to fritter away any more cash, so walk a few minutes on foot to Rucksack Inn @Hongkong Street (rucksackinn.com) to catch some kip. There’s a free breakfast, 24-hour hot showers and wifi, and the staff are exceptionally friendly. From £14.98pn in a 10-bed dorm.

DAY 2: 10:00 Start your morning with a stroll around the fringe of the Singapore River, then head into Chinatown, where restored buildings and temples conjure Singapore’s past. Continue the cultural discovery at the Asian Civilisations Museum (1 Empress Pl; acm.org/sg), with fascinating exhibits that focus on Southeast Asia, West Asia

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and China to piece together Singapore’s foundations.

13:00 Grab a local lunch at Maxwell Road Hawker Centre (cnr South Bridge & Maxwell Rds), one of Chinatown’s finest. The boisterous merchants and eclectic crowd combine to give you a meal and a show.

14:00 After a thoughtful morning, switch the brain to disengage and stroll around Singapore Zoo (zoo.com.sg; admission from £10). The world-class attraction keeps the animals in naturalistic surroundings with hidden barriers, and boasts more than 300 species. You can even take the weight off your feet and enjoy the sights on a boat tour.

17:00 Chug some Asian-accented beers at Archipelago Brewery (archipelagobrewery.com), just off the semiseedy Circular Road. Serving microbrews from Asia Pacific Breweries (the folks behind Tiger), it’s a whole new way of appreciating the regional culture.

19:00 Try another Chinatown classic for dinner, Hong Lim Complex (Cnr South Bridge Rd & Upper Cross St Chinatown). With fewer tourists than most Singaporean streets, it’s packed with proper Chinatown folk and serves up some truly killer feed.

20:00 Get a few rounds in at super-hip craft cocktail bar 13 Wives (13wives.com), then say farewell to Singapore at its long-loved superclub, Zouk (zoukclub.com; admission £17 inc. free drink). With room for 2000 punters and tunes til 4am, there’s no better way to end an epic weekend.

Flights from London Heathrow to Singapore Changi, via Dubai and Colombo, start at £664 return with Emirates emirates.com

Go wild at Singapore Zoo

Hit Chinatown for a true taste of the exotic TNTMAGAZINE.COM

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Salvador BRAZIL

BRAZIL Salvador

PARAGUAY

RIO DE JANEIRO

GETTING THERE British Airways flies direct from London Heathrow to Rio de Janeiro six times a week, starting from £796.19 return, including taxes and charges. From here, fly to Salvador with TAM from about £99. ba.com book.tam.com.br

Drum troupes provide the soundtrack to Salvador 74

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BIGTRIP

And the beat goes on Explore the northern state of Bahia to feel the Afro-Brazilian rhythm in Salvador, plus find a lost world with boob-shaped rocks WORDS GRAEME GREEN

WHEN TO GO: December to The sound of pounding drums throbs into the March is high season, with Carnival church, Tula says, but the European masters taking place in February. It’s a great didn’t think black people had a soul, so they road from a side street. so I wander down time to visit, but also the busiest a narrow corridor to investigate. In a stone weren’t allowed to worship inside. Instead, and most expensive. To avoid courtyard, a team of male musicians hammer the slaves built their own church, a light blue crowds and reduce your costs, away on big bass drums and taut snares. building just down from the cobbled square visit during low season from May Dancing as they play, the troupe creates an Praça de Pelourinho, which used to host to September. Although this is infectious rhythm that draws a crowd of a slave market. More recently, it’s where Brazil’s winter, the temperature curious passersby. Further down the street, Spike Lee filmed the video for Michael is a pleasant 15°C at the lowest.

I find a mostly female gang of drummers Jackson’s They Don’t Care About Us, which working through a few energetic jams. featured local drum group Casa Do Olodum.

CURRENCY: £1 = BRL3.12 The fact that I’m visiting the city of I call in at Olodum’s HQ in the heart of (Brazilian Real) Salvador, within Brazil’s state of Bahia, in the the town, where they’re getting ready for ACCOMMODATION: The weeks leading up to Carnival, goes some way the Carnival. On another cobbled street, caipirinha happy hour and huge towards explaining why the streets are filled breakfast at Hostel Galeria 13 make I stop in at the shop for Dide, an all-female with the sounds of drums, singing groups, drum troupe. They sell clothes and jewellery it an enduring favourite. Dorms samba bands, firecrackers and fireworks, but inside. Many of the city’s percussion groups from £10pn. hostelworld.com this is a lively music-filled city all year round. do social or outreach work with street SEE: braziltour.com “Drumming says who we are,” explains children or drug users, so much of the money Tula, a local guide who shows me around the city’s historic from these shops goes to a good cause. centre. “This movement [of drummers] was born to show the Tula and I walk down to the main tourist market, Mercado people we have an identity. ‘I am from Africa, and I have the Modelo, close to the seafront with stalls selling paintings, drum, which is a symbol of this’.” football tops and souvenirs. Outside, a high energy posse Salvador is a city with serious problems, including poverty, performs Capoeira, the Brazilian mix of martial arts and high levels of crack addiction and crime. I hear reports of dance created by descendants of African slaves, all to – what travellers being robbed while I’m here and it pays to be else? – a drum soundtrack. cautious. But despite all of this, it’s one of my favourite cities Back in my hotel room, the music continues with rhythms in South America and that’s largely due to the Afro-Brazilian reverberating into the evening, on the streets, an impromptu culture here: the people, food, customs, dance and music, gathering of singers and drummers forms, the sound especially drums. Salvador was built on the money made thundering through my room. from the Portuguese slave trade. “Today, 70 per cent of At a football match the next day, a derby between local Bahians are descendents of Africa,” Tula says. “The base of teams Bahia and Vitoria, the drum squads get the party the culture, the food, the music, is from Africa.” atmosphere started as the sunny stadium fills up. They play In the historic centre, where I’m staying, a walkable tangle throughout the match and continue long after the game has of cobbled streets is lined with colourful, slightly crumbly finished, as the fans file out into the evening darkness. The 17th- and 18th-century colonial buildings, shops, bars and beatmakers must be even more exhausted than the players, churches. Tula leads me into a Franciscan church, where who between them fail to score a single goal. a 3D artwork on the ceiling has the eye of a dove following The drums stop the next day. I catch an early bus us wherever we walk. There’s a lot of gold used in the across the state of Bahia, through increasingly lush green interior, a sign of colonial Brazil’s riches. It’s a jumble of countryside, to the town of Lençóis. It couldn’t be more styles inside, from Baroque to Rococo, and African masks different. Salvador has crowds, crime and a relentless energy; ›› carved from wood. The slaves made everything inside the Lençóis’ cobbled streets are spacious, quiet and safe.

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Chapada Diamantina National Park.

Right, top to bottom: beats in the street, colourful colonial buildings I meet Jaime, a local guide, and together we hike out of town and up into the overlooking hills of the Chapada Diamantina National Park. It’s hot work under the afternoon sun and I envy a group of bikini-clad girls bathing in rock pools in the Lençóis river. The town below grew from the diamond trade that sprung up here in the 19th century (Chapada Diamantina roughly translates as ‘diamond plateau’).

“You can imagine thousands and thousands of people working here, by hand, like termites. It’s crazy, huh?” says Jaime, as he shows me the mined ravines and scars in the rocks that were blasted to extract diamonds.

The jewels created a kind of gold rush (or diamond rush), Jaime tells me, as we walk back through town, with people flocking here to make their futures.

“You can imagine in the diamond period, there were bars and prostitutes, people selling diamonds, drinking, fighting … like the Wild West. ” Times have changed. The area became a national park in 1985 and diamond mining was banned in 1995. The local treasure now is the peaceful, remote countryside that attracts in-the-know tourists; though little-known outside the country, Brazilians rate it as one of their most beautiful natural areas, sometimes referred to as a ‘lost world’ because of the dense rainforests, tabletop mountains, caves, pools and waterfalls.

I set out with Jaime next morning to explore, driving out to Palmeiras, starting point for one of the region’s most popular hikes up to the top of Fumaça Waterfall. At 385m, it’s one of the biggest in the region, a fun, sometimes tough, uphill walk on rocks and a riverbed of pink, purple and yellow clay that becomes slick when wet. I’ve come prepared for the brilliant sunshine consistently on show in Brazil, but 76

today the rains arrive; wearing just shorts and a T-shirt, I’m soaked to the skin.

Jaime and I join others at the top sheltering under rocks from the cold rain, until there’s a short break. We take our chance. From the ledge, as the cloud dissolves, there’s a fantastic view of the verdant Capão valley, shadows rolling along the canyon walls. Treetops far below look like broccoli.

The wind is so powerful that it turns the cascading water into a fine spray that drifts up like smoke (Fumaça means

Locals in traditional Carnival attire

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‘smoke’). I crawl carefully to the edge, like several others, and peer nervously down at the pools far below.

We eat in Capão, a small, chilled-out town that’s popular with backpackers and has cannabis smoke wafting through the streets (could the two things be connected?). As lightning fills the sky, Jaime and I tuck into Pizzaria Capão Grande’s pizza with carrot and pesto (sounds odd, but it’s great), over which we drizzle homemade honey with chilli.

On another trip out from Lençóis, I join a minibus of travellers to visit more of the park’s natural highlights. At the first stop, we cross a rickety bridge and hike alongside the rushing Mucugezinho river down to Devil’s Pool, a good but chilly swimming spot. The waters around Lençóis run brown with plant material they pick up which, combined with the white froth that collects on the surface, makes it look like a big river of beer – one up on Willy Wonka.

“

The sound of drums thunders in my room

”

Next, we hike down a steep hill to the entrance of Lapa Doce cave. We turn on our torches as the sunlight fizzles out and we walk into the cool, dank darkness. Crickets scuttle across the sandy floor. Our torches pick out bats nesting in the cave’s high ceiling.

The cave system is full of strange, giant rock formations and stalactites. “It’s a very slow process,” Jaime says. “It takes 35 years for a stalactite to grow 1cm.”

You could marvel at the mind-bogglingly slow process, the concept of time itself … or you could find the rocks that look like boobs. “Look: all natural, no silicone!” Jaime laughs, shining his beam on to the top of a perfect breast. He calls a phallic shape jutting from the ground ‘Erectus Stalactite’.

Others, he suggests, look like a dinosaur, a sombrero, an angel’s wings, a dancing couple – although sometimes you have to look really hard to see the resemblance.

After lunch, we hike to Pratinha Cave, not too impressive ›› on our visit, but at the right time of year and the right

Rogerio Câmara

The Insider's guide Rogerio Câmara is the owner of local Chapada Diamantina National Park tour operator, Nas Alturas What advice would you give travellers going to Brazil?

Brazil is a big country and it’s not easy to get from one place to the other, so allowing plenty of time is really important. Before travelling to Brazil, it’s useful to research the weather conditions in each area and the local celebrations, so you’re not surprised with prices or availability when you get there.

What’s your favourite place in Brazil?

It’s impossible to choose just one so here are three: Paraty because of its lively culture, beautiful islands and the fact that it’s home to a lot of artists. Iguassu Falls, because it’s the natural wonder of the country.

The Pantanal, because it’s the ecological capital, a destination that contains a large variety of flora and fauna.

Where’s the best beach life?

Buzios has a variety of beaches and all of them are easy to access. Trancoso is perfect for people looking for isolation. Fernando de Noronha has 16 beaches with clear waters and it’s home to countless species of fish, marine turtles and dolphins.

Is there a national food or drink visitors should try?

Caipirinha is the national drink, made from cachaça (sugar cane rum), sugar, lime and ice. Feijoada and Acarajé are two national dishes. Feijoada is a stew of beans with beef and pork and Acarajé is made from peeled black-eyed peas formed into a ball and then deep-fried in dendê (palm oil).

What should people pack?

Bring all the basics, such as light clothes, bathing suit, hat, sun block, repellent, light coat – and some extras, such as good energy to party from dusk till dawn.

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time of day (July/ August, about 2-4pm), the lake in the cave is said to glow bright electric-blue. We don’t stay long, instead going for a swim in the fantastically clear waters of the Pratinha river. The water is just the right temperature for this hot day of walking – refreshing but not bitingly cold.

The last stop of the day involves another uphill climb.

It’s not far, but it is steep, as our gang moves up the rocky path of Morro do Pai Inácio Mountain. The reward of the summit, 1150m above sea level, is a 360-degree view of the surrounding countryside, green limestone cliffs and canyons.

There’s a radio mast visible; the rest is all nature, as far as the eye can see. Fittingly for Bahia, the land resembles African plains.

Tourists pose for photos and wait for dusk. My group finds quiet spots on the rocks and settles down to watch the sunset in reverent silence. Up here, there’s not a single voice, not a single drumbeat. ❚

Electric-blue: Pratinha Cave

Graeme Green travelled with Explore. A 15-day Bahia and Rio Explorer trip, including Chapada Diamantina National Park and Salvador, costs from £1699 per person, including all accommodation, transport, tour leader, driver and guide. explore.co.uk

Powerful: Iguassu Falls

[Caption] a Brazilian martial art Capoeira:

BEST OF THE REST MUST-DO BRAZIL ILHA GRANDE This slice of paradise located off the coast of Rio de Janeiro, with beaches, bars and jungle treks, is hugely popular with backpackers and budget travellers. ilhagrande.com.ar

FERNANDO DE NORONHA This small island, off the country’s north coast, is often referred to as the most beautiful place in Brazil, with great scuba diving and the chance to see sharks, dolphins and turtles – though the environmental tax and expensive flights can put many off. fernando-de-noronha.org

Photos: Thinkstock, Getty; Graeme Green; TNT

IGUASSU FALLS The mighty Iguassu Falls are a regular stop on travellers’ itineraries as they make their way into or out of the country to or from Argentina. sevennaturalwonders.org

Musical: a woman serenades Salvador’s [Caption] historic centre

JERICOACOARA Remote bohemian beach resort on the northeast coast with white-sand beaches that are great for adventure sports, such as kite-surfing, with none of the crowds of Rio. Electricity only arrived here in the Eighties and local law forbids street lights, even today. jericoacoara.com

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£169 £779 £359 £399 £249

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8/6/12 17:33:27

DESPERATELYSEEKING

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Post your message at tntmagazine.com/seeking or email seeking@tntmagazine.com. Text TNT and your message to 81707* The Waterloo Crew: May the flat be forever stained and sticky with the remains of our wild nights. I am so sad to be leaving my crazy cronies. If you ever begin to miss me, look at the green stain on the desk from our Monday Martini ritual or the scrape on the wood floor from my fall after our legendary Thirsty Thursday. Thanks for the ace times. The memories are sweet and naughty. Keep it classy, my loves. Dynamo-Diane.

destruction down those narrow stairs. Now if only you could help me find someone to unpack it all for me? Adam.

Blue-eyed barman: The only thing I remember last night was the cheeky little wink you delivered before you gave me before my fourth snakebite. It made me melt like cheddar cheese on a jaffle.

Somehow I lost my purple sweater – yes, that sweater. Do you know where it is? Kelsey.

THINGS THE QUEEN SHOULD DO BEFORE SHE DIES

#483 So what next after a Diamond Jubilee? Pope Elizabeth II anyone?

Welcome to London, Samantha: Sleep on the plane, because as soon as you land, we are hitting the ground running. We don’t have much time to blitz this place, so let’s make it count.

I hope you built up your tolerance and can handle the cider. I promise to take care of you, like I told your mum. Maybe we will even go to the charming land of Amsterdam. Your Tipsy Tour Guide.

Andy, my man: Thanks for helping me move from Waterloo to Camden. I owe you endless pints for saving my computer from total

A bad bromance: Scotty, I need time with Bill… alone. Date night isn’t the same with you constantly quoting movies and reminding him of ex-girlfriends. Gazing lovingly into his eyes isn’t sexy when you are clipping your toenails on the couch next to me. I know you are flatmates, for now, but turn off the video games and meet a nice, forgiving girl. Exhausted Emily.

Tiny Dancer: To the girl belting Elton John songs with me at Waxy’s bar last night, despite the continuous protests, you are my songstress soulmate. I woke up

with half of your phone number smudged on my hand and the other half smeared on my face. I will be waiting for you at Waxy’s next Thursday in the same corner booth.

Bailed blind date: To the man Laura set me up with, sorry but it wasn’t me, it was you. Don’t wear blue suede shoes anywhere, unless you are Elvis. I am not a child, I can order for myself on the big kid menu. Finally, describing in nasty detail experimental shags with your ex-girlfriend was too much for my stomach. Three strikes and you’re out, buddy. Hope the bill wasn’t too much, but you did order it.

Self-tanned nightmare: I was transfixed by the complete confidence you had last night with smeared orange self-tanner unevenly layered on your skin. Keep your hair down, the hand print on your neck was a dead giveaway.

Maybe you had your partner apply it in a moment of sticky ecstasy.

Next time just soak up the sun.

Tina, my comrade: Welcome to my adopted hometown! Maybe I can convince you to be my flatmate after a weekend in jolly old England. Bring comfortable shoes, because I will have you stumbling home every night. Get ready for a wild week. Can’t wait to see you! Mandy.

MIA Andrew: Where have you been sniffing around this time, buddy? Last time you went AWOL, I found you backpacking to Morocco. Did you leave for another wild adventure or are you just stumbling around South Bank looking for your pants? Brandon.

*Messages cost 25p each + standard network rate. 18+ bill payers only. Send STOP to end. Number may show on bill. A2B 08700460138

Photos: Getty

Eaaaaaaar-rin: Bon voyage to our lovely mate Erin. London will miss you; we’ll never forget the cartwheels on the dance floor, hilarious stories, home cooking and teaching us to speak in Kiwi accents. Get into heaps of trouble in Thailand…don’t do anything we wouldn’t do. See ya in Aus next time! Much love from your Avonmore Road crew, Chloe, Katie & Har-bear.

Sweet Caroline: I’m so glad I convinced you to come across the pond to London for your birthday.

Get ready to drink every pint in the pubs. Don’t worry, I won’t let you sit on an unattractive stranger in the night bus. Liz. To the man on the Tube with the red shirt and black glasses: Asking me why I am wearing shoes on the Tube isn’t a great opening line. Maybe I should have asked you why you weren’t wearing deodorant. I will not friend you on Facebook, even if your classy profile picture is of you high-fiving a topless intoxicated girl. Not Interested.

Walk of shame: Your stumbling home Saturday morning was nerve-racking to watch. Glad you didn’t seem to feel the face-plant on Trafalgar Square – maybe it was your electric-blue heels in your hands that cushioned your fall. You were heading away from the palace, so I can only assume you spent the night in Green Park.

Either way, party on. Your valiant effort to not blow chunks in the fountain did not go unnoticed.

Sober Admirer.

106 TNTMAGAZINE.COM

FINAL 1502 DesperatelySeeking QU106 106

8/6/12 15:37:35

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