TNT Magazine / Issue 1408

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August 23-29 2010 Issue 1408 tntmagazine.com

FROM SUMMER BAY TO LA True Blood star Ryan Kwanten GET INTO THE SPIRIT Mexico’s Day of the Dead TAKE THE PLUNGE Skydiving in Spain

IN W UR O T A

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EDITORIAL Editor Daniel Landon Deputy editor Samantha Baden Subs Laura Adcock | Jahn Vannisselroy Travel editor Janine Kelso Sport editor Tom Sturrock Music editor Alison Grinter Web editor Frankie Mullin Staff writer Rebecca Kent Editorial assistant Inger Smith DIGITAL & IT Head of digital marketing and development Syed Ahmad IT manager Stephen Dann ART & PICTURES Art director Shabir Mahmood Senior Designer Astrid Breacker Designer Laura Doyle Picture editor Shila Sultana Picture researcher Laila Pacheco SALES Publishing director Jeff Perkins Classified advertising manager Jaqui Ward Key accounts Charlotte Page Classified sales exec Cameron Knapp MARKETING & EVENTS Marketing exec Danielle Tessari Marketing and events exec Christina McFarlane Marketing and events assistant Phoebe Cherrill ACCOUNTS Finance director Nick Crampton Accounts Margaret Roberts | Alexandra Buchlakova PRODUCTION Head of production Libby West Production manager Jon Cooke Production assistant Justine Mackay TNT PUBLISHING CEO Kevin Ellis Chairman Ken Hurst Receptionist Lisa Lowe TNT Publishing Ltd DISTRIBUTION Emblem Direct Ltd PRINTED BY St Ives Web Ltd NEWS AAP SAPA NZPA PICTURES AAP AP Alamy Getty Images NZPA PA Photos Photolibrary.com Pictures Colour Library Reuters Rex Features Robert Harding SAPA TNT Images PUBLISHER

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I’ve just signed up to do a halfmarathon. Granted, so have 11,000 other people – the kind of freaks who pass up a sundowner for a jog in the park. But I’m a 110kg lagerlover, who at one point in my life wouldn’t have known the meaning of the word ‘marathon’ if my fleshy physique (which is next to godliness, mind), counted on it.

So what brought this on? It’s an enigma to me, but I put it down to the same thing that compelled my mate to drop 20kg on a health kick and another to compete in a triathlon (she even learned to ride a bike for it) – and only since arriving in London.

If it’s something in the water, can someone please just pour it down my throat when I’m hauling my junk over the finish line?

street for a PhD, a wacked-out Scottish guy with an out-there Armenian girlfriend, and an Italian guy who cooks the most amazing meals – and always gives me half. Makes a snag on the barbie look pretty damn unappealing.

by their shiny tracksuits, cheap bling and affectedly ‘street’ cadence and posturing.

The key question – is a chav or a bogan more objectionable?

Andrew, NW1

Sally, Putney

➥ TNT 1406, AUG 9-15 INTERNATIONAL PAD

PEAS IN A POD

My sharehouse has chickens in the garden, several of which have fallen prey to foxes, resulting in scenes of carnage before breakfast.

On the most recent occasion two of these ginger devils worked together in broad daylight, running rings around my housemate who was trying to chase them away. They’re not scared of humans and worst of all, they’re not killing the birds for food as they leave the bodies behind.

Everyone was against rural fox hunting, but maybe it’s a different story when it comes to urban ones? Something needs to be done before they take over the world!

MacGyver from Wimbledon: take off your blinkers (‘Filter

I was recently talking to an English mate about the difference between a bogan

A bogan exhibits casual “ racism and homophobia as a substitute for humour ” out freaks’, TNT Letters). Sure, allowing only Aussies and Kiwis into your sharehouse makes for straightforward living arrangements.

But you’re cutting yourself off from one of the best reasons for living in London – the amazing people. So far in London I’ve lived with a Yankee music journalist, a Canadian woman researching the Bengali families on our

NEXT WEEK IN

and a chav. For me, a bogan is an uber-ocker Aussie equally short on brains and taste. Likes include flannel shirts, tight jeans and bourbon. A bogan may also exhibit casual racism and homophobia as a substitute for real humour.

A chav is equally stupid and tasteless. They drink highly alcoholic cider and have at least a passing interest in petty crime. They can be identified

Travel

Discover the Mekong Delta – one of the jewels of Vietnam

James, via email

SLY AS A FOX

Jules, Wood Green

TNT online Catch up with your fellow TNT readers and share your views at tntmagazine.com/forums

Cinema

Angelina and me: We talk to Salt director Phillip Noyce

TNT Images, Getty Images

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LETTER OF THE WEEK

YOUR SAY POSTCODE WARS

What is it with Brits and their cliques?

London might as well be divided into four battlegrounds: north, south, east and west.

I’ve been here six months and am only just getting my head around the intricacies of Pom snobbery. I’m not even going to start dissecting the whole ‘class’ thing.

Scary stuff. As far as I’ve worked things out in the capital though, it goes like this: north London

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equals English as a second language, east London is for people whose jeans are too tight, west London is for yummy mummies, and south London is home for football hooligans.

None of these stereotypes seem to be that accurate, but the sneering comments based on your postcode are. Why don’t they just build some big walls and be done with it?

Clint, Finsbury Park

Do your own thing.

When you travel with Topdeck, we make sure you have time to check out Europe at your own pace.

Letter of the week wins a Northern Rocker tour of Ireland from Shamrocker (shamrockeradventures.com), valued at £119. Letters may be edited. Prize is not transferable. Your Say is a reader forum and does not represent the opinions of TNT or its staff.

COMMUNITY CORNER forum talk What you’ve been saying online at tntmagazine. com/forums. Get online and have your say.

HIT THE SLOPES We are looking to go to Austria just after Christmas for snowboarding/skiing. Does anyone know any good deals, good places to go, and who to book through?

LuDogg, via tntmagazine.com NEED A RIDE My husband and I are thinking about buying a car

Entertainment

in London, and were wondering if anyone knows of a car fair or market for used cars. We’re not looking for anything too expensive – around £500, just to last us about a year and a half.

We’ve looked on Auto Trader but are finding it hard to go out and see the cars due to work commitments.

Farisha, via tntmagazine.com

Careers trips for 18 to 30 somethings

Aussie songstress Kate Miller-Heidke hits London

Work out at work: How to land a job in the fitness sector

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A 16-DAY TOUR OF INDIA FOR TWO We’ve teamed up with Dragoman to give away two places on its Jodhpurs & Jacaranda 16-day tour of India to one lucky reader.

Be dazzled by the most colourful part of India – Rajasthan. You’ll encounter the whole kaleidoscope: orange turbans, purple saris, mounds of scarlet spices and golden sand dunes beneath a deep blue sky. Explore the white lakeside city of Udaipur, the blue city of Jodhpur and the bright lights of Mumbai.

Visit palaces fit for a maharajah and head into the backstreets of Pushkar to soak up the atmosphere.

Dragoman operates trips across Africa, Asia and South America ranging from two weeks to 35 weeks, so whether you want a quick fix of adventure or you have months to travel across a continent, Dragoman have a trip to inspire you.

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Ireland tour Guidebooks Cherrybomb DVD A pair of clubbing tickets to House Rules A three-day tour of Scotland Photography course Cash and guidebooks A trip to Bath and Stonehenge

PREVIOUS WINNERS TNT 1405: Shake It! clubbing tickets: Beatrix Koos TNT 1405: Win VIP Tickets to the Middlesex 7s: Margaret Naughton, Brett Williams, Diane Smith, Allan Fullarton, Clive Pemberton, David Stratford, Cheron Titus, Glenn Tucker, Annaloa Hilmarsdottir, Tim Blasczyk, Ann Beynon, Joanne Pezzotti, Jane Burnett

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LONDON LIFE

WHAT’S ON Tom Sturrock PICKS THE BEST OF LONDON THIS WEEK

LONDON

NOTTING HILL CARNIVAL FREE WHAT: Chaos descends on the normally well-to-do surrounds of west London. Whether you’re there for the floats, the music, the food or streetside boozing, it’s a massive weekend.

WHEN: August 29-30.

DO IT BECAUSE: A whole corner of London – one that’s usually pretty buttoned-down – is taken over by an infectious party spirit. The main drag is an amazing spectacle but some of the best times are to be had around the sidestreet sound stages.

8

» All around Westbourne Grove, Notting Hill and Ladbroke Grove Check tfl.gov.uk (thenottinghillcarnival.com). See our feature on page 10 to make the most of your carnival experience.

HAMPTON COURT PALACE BEER AND JAZZ FESTIVAL FROM £8 A great spot for a few pints of proper beer or cider while you listen to the likes of the Brand New Heavies (below).

Capital idea: Royal Festival Hall Located in the thriving Southbank Centre, this venue rubs shoulders with the Hayward Gallery and the Poety Library. It’s a truly world-class precinct for arts and culture that’s well worth strolling through if you’ve got a spare afternoon.

Royal Festival Hall itself, built on the site of the old Lion Brewery, is a cavernous 2900seat auditorium that hosts a diverse range of gigs, exhibitions and events. It suffered from poor acoustics

in its original incarnation and closed for two years of refurbishments, reopening in 2007 after a £95m upgrade.

You can see if the money was well-spent when MC Solaar and Wilco play concerts next month; or you can spend an evening with Britain’s favourite polymath and natural treasure Stephen Fry when he performs Fry Live. TOM STURROCK

» Hampton Court Palace, KT8 9AU Hampton Court (hamptoncourtbeerandjazz. com). Aug 27-30

NEIL HAMBURGER FROM £10 With his greasy comb-over and shambling gait, Hamburger presents a withering parody of an unfunny stand-up. It’s awkward and it’s cringeworthy, but also brilliant.

» Soho Theatre, W1D 3NE Tottenham Court Road (sohotheatre.com). Aug 23-28

» Belvedere Road, SE1 8XX Waterloo GREAT FOR: ANY KIND OF GIG

BRITAIN EXPLAINED LONDON BY NUMBERS

Tonnes of rubbish left behind after the 2009 Notting Hill Carnival.

Source: bbc.co.uk

tntmagazine.com

In 2001 and 2002, Princess Diana’s former butler Paul Burrell was accused and then acquitted, under suspicious circumstances, of stealing hundreds of her belongings.

The case fell apart when the Queen confirmed Burrell’s sudden statement that he had warned her he wanted to hold the items in safekeeping. “The Queen has come through for me,” he said on his acquittal.

This forestalled the Queen testifying, the consequences of

of which would have been huge – seeing the Queen being quizzed in court would not have been edifying.

Allegedly the documents in Burrell’s possession were covering up a greater secret, which led to plenty of wild and lurid rumours about scandals in the Royal family.

The prosecution was later accused of wasting police time but it was never established just exactly what Burrell was keeping. SIMON WILLMORE

Getty Images, britainonview.com, Richard Bryant/arcaid.co.uk

100

BURRELL THE BUTLER

Paco’s tip of the week.

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Now in its seventh year, this delightful festival (below) offers 250 films from 30 countries. As with most festivals, you can either see the high-profile stuff or stumble upon a few surprises.

There’s nothing like the first morning of a Test match at Lord’s. The walk from the station, the old gents at the gates, the sense that, here at Lord’s, where Pakistan play England, cricket really matters.

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He’s very English in that foppishly polite way and, in his stand-up routine, Price investigates the existential pitfalls of turning 30.

» The Camden Head, 100 Camden High Street, Camden Town NW1 0LU (national gallery.org.uk).

Aug 23-26

The kind of exhibition Sherlock Holmes might host if he was really into art. See how expert curators can deduce the stories behind famous works.

» National Gallery, Trafalgar Square, WC2N 5DN Charing Cross (national gallery.org.uk). Until Sep 12

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CARNIVAL INSTINCTS London’s biggest street festival comes to Notting Hill this bank holiday weekend – don’t miss out on the action WORDS SIMON WILLMORE

N

otting Hill Carnival takes over London this bank holiday – August 29 and 30. Here’s your guide to making the most of this colourful festival and ensuring you don’t get pushed around by the crowd without seeing what you came for.

tntmagazine.com

GETTING THERE The parade route includes Great Western Road, Westbourne Grove and nearly all of Ladbroke Grove – most of the streets in between are crammed with party people too. Get there early for a good viewing spot – Ladbroke Grove is probably the

Getty Images

“Why officer, is that a truncheon in your pocket…?”

WHAT IS IT? It’s a celebration of Afro-Caribbean culture in London and is Europe’s biggest street festival. Expect more than 70 parade floats, 5000 performers, over 40 sound systems located throughout Notting Hill, costumes galore and about one million revellers.

“There are world-class costumes and displays at the festival,” festival director Ancil Barclay says. ”The artistic excellence and innovative concepts are a great showcase for what we’ll see in the 2012 London Olympics.”

HOW DID IT START? First organised in 1965 to give people from Trinidad a way to commemorate their background, the festival was also seen as a way of alleviating the capital’s poor race relations between locals and immigrants.

The event has grown over the last four decades and is now the second-largest street festival in the world, behind the craziness in Rio every February. Today, the Notting Hill festival incorporates influences from the whole of the Caribbean and even Latin America.

Taste that: wrap your laughing gear around some jerk chicken

SURVIVAL KIT YOU WON’T LAST WITHOUT THESE ESSENTIALS

■ Comfortable clothing: Be prepared for hot and cold weather.

■ Cold beers: The offies will be sold out for sure.

TNT Images, PA Photos

■ Loose change: You can use the local residents’ toilets for a fee if you get caught short in the crowds.

main place to be, so the top of the hill near Lansdowne Crescent offers one of the best vantage points.

“We strongly advise you to come early and find a good spot – there’s enough entertainment for the entire day,” Ancil says.

The Tube stations around the Feel the rhythm: the Notting Hill area close during the groove lasts all weekend festival weekend, and there are Caribbean and Africa, depending on limited interchanges to reduce who you ask. passenger congestion, so it’s essential you Also present are the now quintessential know in advance where you’ll meet your sound systems, which are found in the mates. Ladbroke Grove, Notting Hill Gate surrounding streets and play anything and Westbourne Park will all be closed from Caribbean jazz and calypso to downor have restricted access on the day. See and-dirty London drum and bass. tfl.gov.uk for details.

Highlights include the Good Times EATS stage on Southern Row, featuring A central theme of the festival is legendary DJ Norman Jay, and the traditional Caribbean food, including Rampage system in Colville Square, patties, plantain, curry – goat being the which has, in the past, been graced main meat ingredient – and jerk by the likes of Dizzee Rascal. chicken. Notting Hill Carnival is RETREATS where now-millionaire entrepreneur It’s going to be nigh on Levi Roots (that bloke from Dragon’s impossible to escape the Den who actually did alright) first mayhem and crowds, although made his name as a chef, if you plan ahead and book a making and selling spot in one of the local pubs, his Jamaican you might have somewhere ‘jerk’ barbecue to sit and take a breather. sauce using his The after-parties offer grandmother’s recipe. some incredible lineBEATS ups – even the smaller The parade itself features live pubs boast top-of-themusic, which is organised into mill DJs. four disciplines: costume Have a look for masquerade, steel band, calypso venue guest lists or and soca – the name comes from make sure you book either the fusion of soul and early or you’ll struggle calypso genres or is an to get in to the weekend’s Dance the night away: you know you want to acronym for Sounds Of the bigger events.

■ Map: There will be programmes available on the day so you can locate your favourite spot, as well as the safety and medical facilities.

■ Be aware: Pickpockets have been known to work at the festivals – don’t make it easy for them to target you.

Leave unnecessary valuables at home.

■ Mobile phone: In case you get separated from your crew.

■ Be smart: Don’t linger around after the parade has finished.

■ Be clean: police drug searches are frequent and thorough.

Party on: it’s Europe’s largest carnival, after all

tntmagazine.com

LONDON

■ Good shoes: Flip flops mean dirty toes at the very least and more-thanlikely trodden on feet. Heels are a bad idea – especially if you’re a bloke.

11

SPOTTED ARE YOU SPOTTED IN THE CIRCLE?

LONDON

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POPCORN Heaven Nightclub, Under the Arches, Mon, Aug 16 Photos by: Dina Snaith/ TNT Images

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I’ve been seeing a guy for a few months and he wants to go travelling together but I’m not sure if our relationship is ready for that. What should I do?

Q

A

The key to travelling together is to know each other’s boundaries and give each other plenty of space. For example, if he wants to go on a stupid walking tour, feel free to say “Thanks for the offer, darling, but I’m going to stay in the hotel bar this aftenoon.”

Equally, travelling together can tease out conflict and exacerbate any faultlines that

TOOL OF THE WEEK Unemployed prankster

A

Nothing tests out a relationship like time together on the road. I once had a girl who I had only known for a few weeks, but we drove halfway across the country and knocked over two-dozen small-town banks as we went. Just me and my sweetheart, the two of us, soldiers of fortune, roaming the badlands, searching for our piece of the American rt Love is a dese Dream, even

dilemma? Email dearreuben@ tntmagazine.com

# 383

THUMB-SCREW A MONSTER CONE FOR CHARLIE IN THEIR ACTON SHAREHOUSE

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THINGS THE QUEEN SHOULD DO BEFORE SHE DIES

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if we had to steal it.

With bail bondsmen hot on our tails, we made it across the border and holed up in a little Guadalajara roadhouse. As the bondsman closed in, I left with the loot.

Had we not spent that time together on the road, I’d still be wondering if I did the right thing. But, as that roadhouse started to burn with her inside, I headed out into the Sierra Madres, safe in the knowledge that it’s what she would have wanted.

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Silly Buggers™

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A Nelson man won $500 in a radio competition, but ended up getting the arse from his job as a result.

Daniel Lawson, 20, covered the number plate of his workmate’s ute with a sign saying “i lyk dic”. An ingenius prank, no doubt, and the radio station agreed, awarding Lawson a fistful of cash.

Problem was that his employers didn’t see the funny side, directing Lawson to the dole queue because of his ‘breach of safety protocol’.

Who’s worse? The wacky prankster or his ‘dic’ of a boss?

already exist in your relationship. The mature response is to understand that a successful partnership is all about give and take. So if he hassles you about bringing too much luggage, withold sex until he realises who’s in charge.

Remember, if it doesn’t work out, time spent abroad will give you a great chance to meet someone else. Single girls have to keep their options open.

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THE HEIGHT OF EXCESS: Sick of looking for parking?

Well, according to the New York Post, Hollywood A-lister Nicole Kidman and country muso Keith Urban have splashed out US$10m on a lavish Manhattan penthouse with en suite ‘sky garage’ so that their limo can be parked right next to their new home on the 16th floor.

The huge three-bedroom flat also has two terraces with royal views of the Hudson river.

It may not be a stairway to heaven, but hey, a car elevator is pretty cool too.

A GOOD WEEK FOR

Queensland teeny bopper Cody Simpson has won the Breakthrough Of The Year Award in LA for Best Internet Sensation.

Aged just 13, the YouTube star has already been signed to Atlantic Records. Nice one!

Getty Images

➩

A BAD WEEK FOR

Hyperactive twins Jedward (John and Edward Grimes) have been charged £10,000 for the damage caused to their rented Dublin flat after six months, and no cleaning.

‘I CRASHED A BALL’ Want somebody to liven up your party? Well, if you’re in luck, Katy Perry might just drop by for an uninvited visit.

The I Kissed A Girl singer was staying at the Grand Hyatt hotel in Melbourne when she heard her hit California Gurls play as she walked through a back door of a function room.

Not one to miss out on a party, the fun-loving star spontaneously decided to gatecrash the event – a formal Melbourne High School.

Apparently, Katy grabbed a microphone and began singing and dancing along to Beyonce’s Single Ladies, much to the astonishment and excitement of the 500 revellers.

“She was dancing and laughing with us until the end of the song. Everyone went nuts and it was the perfect end to our evening,” student Adi Kedar told Radaronline.

Brilliant. You’re welcome to crash in on us here at TNT any time, Katy.

SAY WHAT?

“I’m in that circle where, to us, it’s normal. Or we’re just slappers” Katie Price on having kids with two men whom she’s no longer with.

Woman’s Weekly: Xena actress Danielle Cormack talks about her relationship with toyboy Pana HemaTaylor; comedy icon Ewen Gilmour reveals how his love helped his partner overcome an illness; plus why is Kate Middleton losing weight?

AUSTRALIA New Idea: Princess Mary and husband Fredrik talk about their baby joy – and yes, their twins are identical; MasterChef Matt Preston is going on a diet; plus Miss Universe 2004 Jen Hawkins denies anorexia rumours.

Woman’s Day: Aussie Idol judge Kyle Sandilands moves in with stripper Nicole – and ex Jamara Taber is furious..

SOUTH AFRICA Heat: The gloves are off for singer Amor Vittone and former Springbok Joost van der Westhuizen their dirty divorce is aired in public; Idol’s winner, Anke Pietrangeli, talks about the mistakes that crushed her ambitions; plus Jack Parow and Francois Van Coke at Oppikoppi.

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LOOK WHO’S TALKING

The Aussie house DJ started making dance tapes age 13, but has since wowed the likes of Pete Tong and is now planning an explosive set at South West Four

ENTERTAINMENT

Dirty South INTERVIEW ALISON GRINTER Your real name, Dragan Roganovic, is so cool, why did you decide to use Dirty South?

I just wasn’t into using my Christian name as an artist name … I was told I should make a name and this kind of had a ring to it. But now it makes sense because I live in Australia, which is down south.

Are you aware that you share your name with a rap label?

Yeah, it’s a particular sound, a form of hiphop music in America’s south. It’s a bit like calling yourself punk rock – nobody owns that genre.

I have some “ new edits for

South West Four

”

After moving from Melbourne to Serbia aged 13, you started your mixing career using a two-deck tape player – that sounds very old school.

I don’t know if you remember, back in the day, you could only play one tape deck at a time. But for some reason, with this particular model you could play both decks at once. It was like a mixer and I was recording my cassettes to another tape player, then taking the tapes to listen to at school.

The sound quality must have been rubbish – were you over the moon when you got your first proper mixing desk?

I remember renting out a CD console once, just to see how it would feel to do the real thing. It’s pretty crazy to see what it’s like to really mix after using a tape player.

In 2006, you won Pete Tong’s Essential New Tune Award for Evermore’s It’s Too Late. Did that put you on the map internationally?

Yeah, everybody listens to Pete’s show,

six to seven million people around the world. When people discovered me through my Evermore track they went through my back catalogue and the word spread. It started as a little bootleg that I wouldplay at my gigs, then it grew legs and the rest is history.

Have you got anything special planned for SW4?

I definitely have some new edits … for almost every individual show or festival I try to do new things – there’s always some new weapons.

Do you have a favourite festival?

You have an ear for remixing songs that you wouldn’t think lend themselves to making a good club track, like The Door’s This Is The End.

This is the music I grew up with – I really like The Doors. I guess when you know tracks you know what to do with them; I was able to rework it into a house track.

With Phazing, how much did you have to pay to use the riff from Harry Nilsson’s Everybody’s Talking At Me?

We didn’t have to pay the record label because someone else did the guitar parts from the song, it’s the way to do it.

Basically you pay someone a little fee. It’s a reproduction company – then all you need to do is clear the publishing with the writer.

YOU DON’T SAY? What song is guaranteed to get you on the dance floor Well, I’m not much of a dancer – I need to have a few drinks to help me relax and then any song will do.

Have you ever been mistaken for someone famous?

No, but because of the whole Dirty South name people assume I play hip hop and R’n’B, which is always embarrassing.

What’s your porn star name?

Well, my first pet was a German shepherd named Sergeant, and my mother’s maiden name is Jovic. So that would be Sergeant Jovic.

I just did two really cool festivals in California: Coachella and Electric Daisy Carnival. The vibe was amazing – I’ve never got such a response from a crowd before. Electric Daisy Carnival was the biggest thing I’ve ever played …

I think there were sixty to seventy thousand people in front of me. It was mayhem. It leaves a big mark in my head.

» South West Four, Clapham Common, SW4 9DE Clapham Common (southwestfour.com). Aug 28-29.

Day tickets from £45

21

ENTERTAINMENT

CINEMA

22

The Girl Who Played with Fire

SCREEN TEST: STIEG LARSSON

Noomi Rapace, Michael Nyqvist

STARRING:

RT 129 MINS

1 Who is “the girl”?

2 What is the English meaning of the original title of the first book in the Millennium Trilogy?

3 How many of the Millennium Trilogy books were published before Larsson’s death?

4 What was Larsson’s original first name?

5 Who found Larsson’s will, and with whom are they in dispute over it?

★★★★★

After director Niels Arden Oplev’s near-perfect adaptation of popular novel The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo, there’s a lot of expectation surrounding sequel The Girl Who Played With Fire.

Sadly, latest director Daniel Alfredson makes one wrong turn after another. Whereas the first film was a thrilling drama, the second instalment is dull and confusing.

The sequel sees journalist Mikael Blomkvist (Nyqvist) trying to clear the name of computer hacker Lisbeth Salander (Rapace) after a journalist and his girlfriend are murdered. As the pair close in on the real killer, someone from Salander’s past comes back to haunt her.

Alfredson has stuffed his film with characters that add

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little to the plot, and it plods along without any real urgency.

Criminally, the chemistry between Mikael and Lisbeth is largely downplayed, while the climax veers dangerously close to the ridiculous. Rapace is superb as the complex,

damaged heroine but, after this misstep, final instalment The Girl Who Kicked The Hornet’s Nest has its work cut out to save the trilogy.

GOOD FOR: Those who haven’t read the book.

PIERRE DE VILLIERS

LAST WEEK’S ANSWERS 1 Sex and the City 2 Willis and Schwarzenegger 3 Stallone 4 Six 5 Four LAST WEEK’S WINNER Terence Choi

THE REEL DEAL

SCOTT PILGRIM VS THE WORLD

Young Australian actor Kodi Smit-McPhee (pictured) has been likened to a young Marlon Brando.

James Nesbitt, the Northern Irish star of Cold Feet, who appears with Smit-McPhee in upcoming Australian flick Matching Jack, says he was incredibly impressed by the youngster, who at the time of shooting was barely 13.

“He’s a young Brando,” Nesbitt told the Sydney Morning Herald. “And sometimes before a scene I’d wonder if I was up to it.”

Ideal for anyone who grew up in front of a games console, Edgar Wright’s teen comedy sees a slacker (Michael Cera) take on the evil exes of his new girlfriend in Mortal Kombat-type battles. You need ADD to truly enjoy the fast-moving plot but the visuals are inspired and performances spot-on.

GOOD FOR: Geeks. PDV

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SALT

★★★★★ Aussie director Phillip Noyce puts Angelina Jolie through her paces in this action film about a CIA agent who goes on the run after being outed as a Russian spy. The stunts and fight scenes are entertaining but a stronger storyline would have helped.

GOOD FOR: Those who like to see Angelina kick arse. PDV

»

See our interview with Salt director Phillip Noyce next week.

Kerry Hayes, Getty Images

Australian crime thriller Animal Kingdom is being tipped as a contender for Academy Award nominations after its release to US cinemas.

In January, it won the World Cinema Grand Jury prize at the Sundance Festival.

★★★★★

Animal Kingdom is based on a true story about a family of armed robbers who fall apart under police pressure.

Veteran Australian actress Jacki Weaver has now found herself the subject of Oscars buzz for her portrayal of “Smurf” Cody.

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ENTERTAINMENT 25 Kwanten as Shane Cooper in Red Hill (above and left)

A BOY’S OWN FANTASY At least his latest film may rescue this.

Written and directed by debut Aussie director Patrick Hughes, Red Hill is a modern-day western set in the outback.

Think No Country For Old Men meets Dead Man’s Shoes, and you’ll come some way to describing this story of an escaped convict (a scar-faced Tommy Lewis) who comes to revenge himself upon the townsfolk who put him away.

Kwanten plays Shane Cooper, a rookie cop on his first day on the job. “It’s like every young boy’s fantasy, wielding guns and chasing down the bad guy,” he says.

“You couldn’t ask for more.”

Shot in just 30 days in the small Victoria town of Omeo, Kwanten admits it was probably “the most exciting thing to happen to that town since the Gold Rush

days”. What’s more, having flown directly from filming True Blood in Louisiana to the set, it was anything but glamorous.

“I remember I had my head in hay and pig poo and I’m chained up. And I’m watching Patrick, my director, pretend to be a panther because we couldn’t get a real one due to logistics. So he’s on the ground, licking his paws, and I’m supposed to be scared. I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry!”

Kwanten lived off his credit card and cycled his way around auditions. At one, at studio DreamWorks, he even managed to chain his ride up in a certain director’s parking space. “[Steven] Spielberg was waiting in his big SUV, with the tinted windows, and I’d literally wrapped the chain around a sign saying ‘Mr Spielberg’!”

Kwanten, who calls Los Angeles his “base”, is not one of these actors who has forgotten his roots – particularly his early years on Home and Away. “I never talk bad

HOMECOMING In many ways it’s something of a homecoming for the 33-year-old Kwanten, who left Sydney back in 2002 to make Texas high school football film The Junction Boys. After the film’s executive producer – who later became his manager – convinced him to stay in Los Angeles,

People are “ amazed that

Getty Images

”

about it because I really feel like they gave me such leeway to create and to play, to take risks, to fall on my arse, to make an idiot of myself. My character was such an extrovert and I’m such a socio-phobe. I get a little uncomfortable around people.”

But with the popularity of True Blood – “even an optimist couldn’t have predicted the level of success that we’ve had” – it seems his only real difficulty these days is seeing his LA house become a crash-pad for all his old mates. “Once people know that there’s a friend overseas that has a house and a fridge full of beer,” he grins, “They’re there in a heartbeat.”

OH, THE HORROR! Gore-hounds can gorge themselves on a glut of Aussie and Kiwi product at this year’s Fright Fest, the annual UK showcase for all things horror. Josh Reed’s Primal comes highly recommended, while fans of Saw and Misery will certainly like Sean Byrne’s The Loved Ones, dubbed “the coolest Ozploitation in ages” by the festival. Meanwhile, James Rabbitts’ feature debut The Clinic, set in 1979, is an Outback abduction tale with a gruesome twist. And from New Zealand – a welcome return for David Blyth (who made 1984 splatter movie Death Warmed Up) with Wound, a stirring study of mental illness and incest. Fright Fest runs from Aug 26-30.

I’m Australian

» Red Hill screens at the Fright Fest at Heads up: The Loved Ones

The Empire Cinema, Leicester Square, Leicester Square (frightfest.co.uk).

August 27, 9pm. On general release in 2011.

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CULTURE DANTON’S DEATH Set in 1794 during the lead-up to Danton’s public execution, Georg Buchner’s 1835 play (in an interval-free version by Howard Brenton) paints an angry picture of political unrest and infighting during which former allies become foes and old friends are sent to the guillotine.

In stark contrast to Elliot Levey’s priggish Robespierre, finding virtue in violence, the married, whoring Danton (a swaggering Toby Stephens) is tired of bloodshed, his combative spirit only rekindled in an impassioned courtroom rebuttal of the accusations of Alec Newman’s Saint-Just.

ENTERTAINMENT

SEE THIS: Theatre There’s not much room for dramatic action in Michael Grandage’s fluent, wordy, production – but it looks wonderful with the light piercing the windows of Christopher Oram’s woodpanelled set.

LOUISE KINGSLEY

» Olivier at the National

27

Theatre, South Bank, SE1 9PX Waterloo (nationaltheatre.org.uk).

Until October 14. From £10

TNT online For more reviews of events in London go to tntmagazine.com/londonlife

WORTH A LOOK Les Miserables celebrates 25 years since its first London performance with a 22-date run at the place where it

premiered in 1985. » Barbican, Silk Street, EC2Y 8DS

•B e scared out of your wits at

Barbican (barbican.org.uk). Sep 14-Oct 2. From £15

Ghost Stories » Duke of York’s Theatre, St Martin’s Lane, WC2N 4BG

Leicester Square (ghoststoriestheshow.co.uk). Until Nov 7. From £15

EXHIBITION OF THE WEEK

BOOKS OUT THIS WEEK

ROMANTICS

THE RED QUEEN

THE PERFECT NAZI

Philippa Gregory

Martin Davidson

(Simon & Schuster)

(Viking) AUG 26

OUT NOW

The queen of the historical novel returns with the story of the childbride of Edmund Tudor, who, although widowed in her early teens, uses wily plotting to infiltrate the house of York.

British writer Martin Davidson draws on personal documents to excavate his grandfather’s past as a loyal servant to Nazi Germany and eventual high-ranking officer in Hitler’s dreaded SS.

THE THIEF-TAKER’S APPRENTICE

THE JLS ANNUAL 2011

Stephen Deas

Posy Edwards

(Gollancz) AUG 26

(Orion) AUG 26

The beginning of a new fantasy series which tells the story of young thief Berren who makes the mistake of stealing a thief-taker’s purse. It should be the end of him but he gets a lucky break.

Strictly for fans of the X-Factor boy band, this annual is chock full of upto-date news, gossip from the tour bus, pictures and quizzes, trivia, even info on how to dress like the guys.

★★★★★

This nine-room exhibition features 170 paintings which explore the origins, inspirations and legacies of British Romantic art. The highlight is eight tiny hand-coloured etchings by William Blake (1757-1827) which were discovered in an old railway timetable in the 1970s after being hidden for

almost 200 years. The images, some of which portray people burning alive, pack a powerful punch. In contrast, the room of later works by JMW Turner, showcasing his experimental use of colour and light, is truly uplifting. SAMANTHA BADEN

» Tate Britain, Millbank, SW1P Pimlico (tate.org.uk).

4RG Until Dec 21. Free.

MORE EXHIBITIONS Thirty contemporary artists Johan Persson

come together in The New Decor » The Hayward, Southbank, SE1 8XX

•S ee New York

Waterloo (haywardgallery.org.uk). Until Sept 5. Free

in Alex Katz Portraits » National Portrait Gallery, St Martin’s Place, London, WC2H 0HE

Charing Cross (npg.org.uk). Until Sept 21. Free

tntmagazine.com

MUSIC

MUSIC & CLUBS

ALBUM OF THE WEEK

!!!

Koko, Nov 4 (0870 432 5527). £15 Airbourne Brixton Academy, Dec 2 (0844 477 2000). £17.50 Arcade Fire The O2, Dec 1 (0844 856 0202). £30 Sarah Blasko Electric Ballroom, Nov 17 (0870 264 3333). £12.50

KLAXONS Surfing The Void (Polydor)

28

FAST FORWARD

★★★★★

Polydor apparently rejected the original version of Surfing The Void, which begs the question: were the label reining in the British trio’s indulgent experimentalism or stifling their creativity?

TNT Music reckons it’s possibly a bit of both. Ravey, synthed-up opener Echoes sounds like the same Klaxons who won the Mercury Prize

for their genre-defining debut album Myths Of The Near Future, but mostly the songs on here seem to labour beneath a cacophony of distorted electro and guitars.

Where Myths ... was vivid and energised, Surfing ... is sluggish

and murky, lacking the hedonistic abandon which made Klaxons the nu-rave vanguards. Sadly, there’s a hollowness to Surfing The Void which suggests the Klaxons are not happy right now.

ALISON GRINTER

EELS

JOHN MELLENCAMP

ONE NIGHT ONLY

Tomorrow Morning (E Works) American rocker Mark ‘E’ Everett concludes his concept album trilogy on an electronic high.

No Better Than This (Rounder) The long-time champ of Midwest, salt-of-the-earth types looks to the Deep South for inspiration.

One Night Only (Mercury) Newcomers from North Yorkshire peddle Arctic Monkeys-styled indie on their debut album.

ALSO OUT

MUSIC NEWS were to go back to Perth our career would die,” guitarist Gareth McGrillen told the Sydney Morning Herald, adding that Western Australia is too far from dance music’s European heartland. “The place makes me lazy whereas London is a harsh mistress, if you don’t try to succeed there then you’ll die.”

Barnstorming drum ’n’ bass outfit Pendulum have given their hometown a kick, saying they could never live in Perth and make good music.

“We like to have our finger on the pulse and I think if we

CHARTS

The future of the G-Taranaki festival in New Plymouth, NZ, looks secure, after a huge crowd rocked up at the event – no doubt drawn by the appearance of headliner Slash. Ticket sales were slow

in the lead-up, but the TSB Stadium was packed for the Saturday show. Organisers are already planning for next year’s festival.

Hot on the heels of keeping his promise to waterski naked if Spain won the World Cup, crooner Enrique Iglesias is again getting into the sporting act, this time in South Africa. Iglesias has been confirmed as the headline act for a September 9 concert in Johannesburg to celebrate the start of the Champions League Twenty20 cricket tournament.

NEW ZEALAND

SOUTH AFRICA

UK

No 1 single Love The Fall, Michael Paynter No 1 album Recovery, Eminem

No 1 single Dynamite, Taio Cruz No 1 album Recovery, Eminem

No 1 single Acapella, Kelis No 1 album Now That’s What I Call Music 55, various artists

No 1 single Club Can’t Handle Me, Flo Rida No 1 album Recovery, Eminem

tntmagazine.com

Hoodoo Gurus Shepherds Bush Empire, Oct 3 (0844 477 2000). £19.50 Goldfrapp Hammersmith Apollo, Nov 11 (0844 277 4321). £25 Hugh Masekela and The Mahotella Queens Royal Festival Hall, Nov 12 (0871 663 2501). £10-£27.50 Pendulum Wembley Arena, Dec 3 (0844 815 0815). £25 Mark Ronson & the Business Intl.

Hackney Empire, Sep 29 (hackneyempire.co.uk) £20-£25 Salmonella Dub Shepherd’s Bush Empire, Sep 24-25 (0844 477 2000). £20 Xavier Rudd & Izintaba Shepherds Bush Empire, Dec 6 (0844 477 2000). £18.50

Getty Images

AUSTRALIA

The Cat Empire Brixton Academy, Oct 23 (0844 477 2000). £19.50 Alice Cooper’s Halloween Night Of Fear Roundhouse, Oct 31 & Nov 1 (roundhouse.org.uk). £34-£38.50 Fat Freddy’s Drop The Troxy, Sep 9 (0870 264 3333). £27.50 Gorillaz The O2, Nov 14-16 (0844 277 4321). £45 Grinderman Hammersmith Apollo, Oct 1 (0844 844 4748). £25-£27 Guns N’ Roses The O2, Oct 13 (08444 775 775). £51-£56

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MUSIC

GIG GUIDE MUSIC & CLUBS

Alison Grinter PICKS OUT THIS WEEK’S BEST LIVE MUSIC

GIG OF THE WEEK DIE ANTWOORD Ever since Afrikaans rap outfit Die Antwoord (The Answer) posted their music video Enter the Ninja online and caused a web meltdown earlier this year, we’ve been waiting with bated breath for the Capetonians to land in London. Well, here they are, on the bill of the L.E.D. Festival (see clubbing on page 34 for more info). With filthy songs like Jou Ma se Poes in ‘n Fishpaste Jar, Ninja, Yo-Landi Vi$$er (right) and DJ Hi-Tek have created their very own genre of “zef” (trash) rap which is as exciting as it is original.

31

» At L.E.D Festival, Victoria Park, E3 5SN

Bethnal Green (ledfestival.net). Sat, Aug 28. £65, w/e £37.50 day

READING FESTIVAL

Given Carl Barat’s and Pete Doherty’s lukewarm efforts with more recent bands, it’s easy to forget the chemistry these two had with The Libertines before the band split in a fug of heroin and recrimination in 2004. See for yourself as the quartet pre-empt their long awaited reunion shows at the Reading/Leeds festy with this one-off gig.

» Reading, Berkshire, RG1 1QH

» Forum, 9-17 Highgate Rd, NW5 1JY

Reading (readingfestival.com) August 27-29. Sold out. viagogo.co.uk has official resale tickets

NEW BAND ALERT

Locnville THE BUZZ SO FAR Locnville are New York-born, South African-

Getty Images

THE LIBERTINES

Reading Festival has never pretended to be something it ain’t. And it sure as hell ain’t one of those boutique affairs with fancy dress and gourmet burgers. Nope, those flocking to this Berkshire town expect guitar rock and will get it in spades with Guns N’ Roses, Arcade Fire and Blink 182 headlining respectively across three nights.

raised twin brothers Andrew and Brian Chaplin. The 20-yearolds’ shtick is to rap over woozy, warped electro – with contagious effect. Their American hip-hop flavoured debut album Sun In My Pocket has already swept their native South Africa like a virus, achieving platinum status within a month of release.

WHAT ELSE? Raised on a rock-rich diet of AC/DC, Kiss, Staind, Nirvana and Limp Bizkit, the twins had already penned and recorded their first full set of rock songs by the age of 11.

THE PLUG Single Sun In My Pocket out on Sep 5 through Epic.

Kentish Town

(0844 847 2405). Wed, Aug 25. £30

FESTIVAL WATCH Benicassim earlybird tickets Kasabian, Vampire Weekend, The Prodigy and Gorillaz all made sure that the 16th annual Benicassim festival was a raging success. Now the 17th edition has been announced for July 2011 with earlybird tickets going on sale at a discounted price in the next few days. The 2011 lineup is yet to be confirmed.

Benicassim, Spain (fiberfib.com). July 14-17, 2011.

Afrovibes For cutting edge theatre, dance, visual arts and live music from South Africa, check out this touring festival (complete with its own township cafe) when it hits London this autumn.

The Albany, Deptford, SE8 4AG (ukarts.com). Oct 5-10.

Super earlybird tickets on sale for Secret Garden Party No acts have been confirmed for 2011’s Secret Garden Party but tickets are now on sale for the special price of £125.

Mill Hill Field, Cambridgeshire (uk.secretgardenparty.com).

July 21-24,2011 Split Festival Sunderland now has its very own festival complete with a kicking indie line-up made up of Maximo Park (below), The Futureheads and more.

Ashbrooke Sports Club, Sunderland (splitfestival.com).

Sep 25-26.

tntmagazine.com

MUSIC LISTINGS

MUSIC & CLUBS

Ugly Duckling Hip-hop from the

32

MONDAY 23

Californian outfit. Plan B, Brixton Rd, SW9 4AY (020 7733 0926). £15.

SATURDAY 28

Monty Alexander Trio

Wildbirds & Peacedrums

Mainstream jazz classics from the Jamaican-born pianist and band. Ronnie Scott’s, Frith St, W1D

The forward-thinking Swedish duo offers its take on pop, with soulful vocals and choir accompaniment.

Pause Reaction Alt rock from the South Wales-based fourpiece. Hope And Anchor, Upper St,

Before The Escape, Action

4HT (020 7439 0747). £20-£37.50.

The Lexington, Pentonville Rd, N1 9JB (020 7837 5371). £8.50.

Bad Religion Classic punkrock from the Los Angelesbased band. Shepherds

FRIDAY 27

Bush Empire, Shepherd’s Bush Green, W12 8TT (0905 020 3999/ cc 0844 477 2000). £17.50.

Big Mamma’s Door The band plays 1950s-style soul and blues. Charlie Wright’s

The Chebbs The four-piece plays rock. The Roadhouse, The

International Bar, Pitfield St, N1 6EN (020 7490 8345). £6.

Piazza, Covent Garden Market, WC2E 8HB (020 7379 6132). £5, free before 10pm.

The London-based four-piece plays folk and Americana.

swing inspired by Stephane Grappelli and Django Reinhardt.

The Green Note Cafe, Parkway, NW1 7AN (020 7485 9899). £6.

My Own Private Alaska, Robot Orchestra, Blank Canvas Screamo-tinged alt rock from the French trio.

Dublin Castle, Parkway, NW1 7AN (020 8806 2668). £6, concs £4.50.

Skull Of A Mammoth, Divine Chaos, De Profundis Melodic contemporary metal from the London-based outfit.

The Purple Turtle, Crowndale Rd, NW1 1TN (020 7383 4976). £5.

Charlie Wood Blues and jazz

TNT’S TOP BOOKING

THE PARLOTONES Shepherds Bush Empire, W12 8TT Shepherd’s Bush (o2shepherdsbushempire.co.uk). Nov 25, £14 This gig might be slightly smaller than playing at the opening of the World Cup, but South Africa’s biggest-selling group will no doubt be ready for one of their customary powerhouse shows.

WEDNESDAY 25 Alkaline Trio The American punk-pop trio promotes its album, This Addiction.

originals from the US-born singer-songwriter and pianist.

Relentless Garage, Highbury Corner, N5 1RD (0870 060 3777/ cc 0844 847 1678). £15.50.

606 Club, Lots Rd, SW10 0QD (020 7352 5953). £8-£10.

Klaxons Left-field indie-pop from the London-based band. Heaven,

TUESDAY 24 Avi Buffalo Californiabased alt rock four-piece.

Cargo, Rivington St, EC2A 3AY (020 7739 3440). £10.

The Fanclub, Fallen Breaks, Kruk The band plays indie-pop.

Hope And Anchor, Upper St, N1 1RL (020 7354 1312). £6, concs £4.50.

Arlo Guthrie Woody

Charing Cross Arches, Villiers St, WC2N 6NG (020 7930 2020). £15.

Zoot Money’s Surprise Party The resident bluesman performs standards. Bull’s Head, Lonsdale Rd, Barnes, SW13 9PY (020 8876 5241). £10.

Contemporary hard rock from the band from Pontypridd.

Shepherds Bush Empire, Shepherd’s Bush Green, W12 8TT (0905 020 3999/ cc 0844 477 2000). £20.

Kate Eden Trio The soulful jazz vocalist is joined by pianist Alex Hutton and double bassist Simon Little.

from the veteran American pianist. Pizza Express Jazz Club,

Jackanory And The Ball The

Dean St, W1D 3RW (020 7437 9595/ cc 0845 602 7017). £15.

duo blends hip-hop, indie and pop. Cargo, Rivington St, EC2A 3AY (020 7739 3440). £7, adv £5.

The Joe Public, Twelve Titans, The 9s Alt rock fourpiece. The Dogstar, Coldharbour

Commercial Americana from the Milton Keynes-based singer-songwriter. The Constitution, St Pancras Way, NW1 0QT (020 7387 4805). £5, concs £4.

LED Festival Featuring David Guetta, Soulwax, Calvin Harris, Audio Bullys, Axwell, Sebastian Ingrosso and Tiga on Friday, and Leftfield, Goldfrapp, Friendly Fires, Aphex Twin, Annie Mac, Professor Green, Boy Better Know and Shy FX on Saturday. Victoria Park,

Rd, SW3 4UT (020 7351 5031). £20.

Omar Souleyman The Syrian singer performs pop and folk.

Corsica Studios, Farrell Court, SE17 1LB (020 7703 4760). £15.

Bobby Wellins Scottish tenor saxophonist. 606 Club, Lots Rd, SW10 0QD (020 7352 5953). £12.

Ladi 6 And Parks The New

London-based five-piece plays indie-rock. Half Moon,

Zealand-based vocalist performs soul, hip-hop and R’n’B. The

SUNDAY 29

Putney, Lower Richmond Rd, SW15 1EU (020 8780 9383). £5.

Everton Blender Classic

Rhythm Factory, Whitechapel Rd, E1 1EW (020 7375 3774). £12, adv £7.50.

Dave Manington’s Riff Raff

Motion City Soundtrack

Improvised jazz from the versatile collective. The Vortex Jazz Club,

Head, Lonsdale Rd, Barnes, SW13 9PY (020 8876 5241). £10.

from the St Louis-based guitarist and singer-songwriter. The

The US-based five-piece plays pop-rock and punk.

Dalston Culture House, Gillett St, N16 8JH (020 7254 4097). £10.

Luminaire, Kilburn High Rd, NW6 7JR (020 7372 7123). £14, adv £12.

The Underworld, Camden High St, NW1 0NE (020 7482 1932). £16.

Jonathan Powell, Toodar The Cardiff-based troubadour plays mellow acoustic folk. Bull And

Never The Bride London-

Airto Moreira & Flora Purim With The Ronnie Scotts All Stars The duo and their

based pop-rock band. Bull’s

band play melodic jazz fusion.

Head, Lonsdale Rd, Barnes, SW13 9PY (020 8876 5241). £10.

Ronnie Scott’s, Frith St, W1D 4HT (020 7439 0747). £15-£41.50.

Saintsaviour, Breakinbear, Robbie Boyd, Elena Tonra

John Otway, The Quirky Cult singer-songwriter and his band.

Alt pop from the London-based singer-songwriter. Louise T

Dublin Castle, Parkway, NW1 7AN (020 8806 2668). £6, concs £5.

Gate, Kentish Town Rd, NW5 2TJ (020 8826 5000). £6, w/flyer £5.

plays off-kilter indie. The

Surfer Blood Indie-pop

Barfly, Camden, Chalk Farm Rd, NW1 8AN (0844 847 2424). £6.

four-piece from Florida.

The Lexington, Pentonville Rd, N1 9JB (020 7837 5371). £10.

Blouin Institute, Olaf St, W11 4BE (020 7985 9600). £8, adv £5.

Frank Turner, Ben Marwood The folk-punk artist plays songs from his album, Poetry Of The Deed. The Deptford Arms, Deptford High St, SE8 4RT (020 8692 1180). £12.

Thrice The California-based four-piece plays modern rock.

The Electric Ballroom, Camden High St, NW1 8QP (020 7485 9006). £16.

indie-rock with pop-leanings.

The Barfly, Camden, Chalk Farm Rd, NW1 8AN (0844 847 2424). £6.

singer. The Hootananny, Effra Rd, SW2 1DF (020 7737 7273). £12.

Desecration, Dead Beyond Buried, Infestation, Fleshrot The Newport-based three-piece plays uncompromisingly controversial death metal.

The Purple Turtle, Crowndale Rd, NW1 1TN (020 7383 4976). £12.

Pocket Satellite, Donna Maciocia, Lion O’Brien, Danni Nicholls Winsome folkpop from the Sheffield-based band. Bush Hall, Uxbridge Rd, W12 7LJ (020 8222 6955). £8.

Reuben Richards & Soul Train Blues, funk and

Anita Wardell Award-winning bebop vocalist. 606 Club, Lots

soul from the seven-piece.

Rd, SW10 0QD (020 7352 5953). £10.

Boisdale Of Belgravia, Eccleston St, SW1W 9LX (020 7730 6922). £12, £4.50 before 10pm.

Janne Westerlund The Uniquetunes Electro-rock

Submit your free listing at least three weeks prior to the publication by emailing gigs@pressassociation.com.

Zemitones, The Angry Years The band plays lively

reggae from the Jamaican

Pokey LaFarge & The South City Three Country and blues

tntmagazine.com

Ian Shaw Contemporary jazz from the singer and pianist. The Pheasantry, Kings

The Longfellows The

The Good Ship, Kilburn High Rd, NW6 7JR (07949 008253). £5.

12 Bar Club, Denmark Pl, WC2H 8NL (020 7240 2622). £6.

Dublin Castle, Parkway, NW1 7AN (020 8806 2668). £6, concs £5.

Koko, Camden High St, NW1 7JE (0870 432 5527). £18.50.

Contemporary jazz from the London-based pianistvocalist and band. Bull’s

Helsinki-based musician plays haunting country-tinged folk.

Lost Souls Hardcore metal from the Bristolian band.

Grove Rd, E3 5SN (08707 535 353). £40, festival pass £70.

Benet McLean Quartet

606 Club, Lots Rd, SW10 0QD (020 7352 5953). £8-£10.

The Leo Green Experience

Dover St, W1S 4LQ (020 7629 9813). £15, free to diners before 10pm.

Rose Elinor Dougall, Thomas White The Brighton-based

Folkface The house band of the Chris Moyles Show on BBC Radio 1, Dave Vitty and Dominic Byrne play an alternative mix of folk and parodies. 100 Club, Oxford St,

Slaughtered Lamb, Great Sutton St, EC1V 0DX (020 7253 1516). £5.

Barry Harris Bebop jazz

Jon Kendall, Jack McDougall, Will McNicol

Barfly, Camden, Chalk Farm Rd, NW1 8AN (0844 847 2424). £6.50.

blues band from London. The

The flamboyant saxophonist and his group plays swing, blues and soul. Dover St Restaurant And Bar,

THURSDAY 26 singer performs indie-pop from her album, Without Why. The

The Feuding Lloyds, Darling Bones, Sam Sallon Americana, folk and

Ed Kowalczyk The US-based musician plays rock ballads.

Birmingham-based combo.

atmospheric Gypsy-jazz.

The Underworld, Camden High St, NW1 0NE (020 7482 1932). £20.

London-based musician performs 1920s swing with his Rhythm Boys. Volupte, Norwich

Neon Asylum, Eyes Of Mars, Goid Electro-dance from the

Trio Manouche, Quentin Collins The outfit plays

The Texas-based band plays death-metal and grindcore.

W1D 1LL (020 7636 0933). £12.

Dingwalls, Camden Lock, Chalk Farm Rd, NW1 8AB (020 7428 0010/ cc 020 7428 5929). £23.50.

So Cow, Kamikaze Practice The Irish band

Devourment, Dead Haggis Deathfest, Human Mincer

Alex Mendham The

St, EC4A 1EJ (020 7831 1677). £10.

the atmospheric duo. The Lexington, Pentonville Rd, N1 9JB (020 7837 5371). £6.

Piccadilly, W1J 9HN (020 7734 8142/ cc 0845 345 6053). £10, £45 inc meal.

Bull’s Head, Lonsdale Rd, Barnes, SW13 9PY (020 8876 5241). £10.

Ln, SW9 8LQ (020 7733 7515). £5.

Lostprophets, Attack Attack

Guthrie’s son performs folk, blues and protest songs.

Phantom, King Antics And Hyrst Eerie rock from

Congo Faith Healers Alt rock and blues from the Londonbased four-piece. Pigalle,

The Cedars, Jonny Suitcase

Hot Club Of Boisdale Parisian Boisdale Of Belgravia, Eccleston St, SW1W 9LX (020 7730 6922). £12, £4.50 before 10pm.

N1 1RL (020 7354 1312). £6, concs £5.

from the St Petersburg-based outfit. 100 Club, Oxford St, W1D 1LL (020 7636 0933). £10, adv £8.

TNT online For full listings info go to tntmagazine. com/whats_on

CLUBBING

MUSIC & CLUBS

CLUB GUIDE

34

Natasha Vuckovic PICKS OUT THIS WEEK’S BEST CLUB NIGHTS

CLUB OF THE WEEK SOUTH WEST FOUR SW4 is a highlight on London’s clubbing calendar and for the first time ever the festival is taking Clapham Common for two full days of the August bank holiday weekend. It’s a feast for the ears starring Armin van Buuren, Erick Morillo, Sasha, John Digweed, Paul Oakenfold and Dirty South on Saturday and Fatboy Slim, Carl Cox, Salt-n-Pepa, Dubfire and Zane Lowe on Sunday. With a ridiculously huge line-up, your DJ dollar certainly goes the distance at SW4.

» Clapham Common, SW4 9DE

Clapham Common (southwestfour.com). Aug 28-29, 12pm-9pm. £50 day

beats/breaks

funk/soul

drum ’n’ bass

electro

hip-hop

L.E.D. FESTIVAL

SOUTHWESTMORE

Friday is dance day at SW4 rival L.E.D and we’re loving the line-up for the festival’s inaugural knees-up.

Big French cheese David Guetta leads the names in lights, but it gets so much better with Soulwax, Calvin Harris, Tiga and Sebastian Ingrosso. Look out for Axwell’s Heart Show featuring a 6mhigh LED heart with visuals that sync to his set.

There are plenty of clubs inviting you to SW4 afterparty with them, but this is the official post-festival soiree.

Yes, it runs over both days, carrying over the daytime shenanigans into the night.

Pete Tong and Mark Knight are Saturday’s guests while Layo & Bushwacka! and M.A.N.D.Y are up for the Sunday special.

» Victoria Park, E9 7HD

Mile

End (ledfestival.net). Sat, Aug 27 and Sun, Aug 28, 1pm11pm. £70 w/e, £40 day

» Ministry of Sound, 103 Gaunt St, SE1 6DP Elephant & Castle (ministryofsound.com).

Sat, Aug 28 and Sun, Aug 29, 10pm-6am. From £15 adv

We have a pair of tickets to House Rules to give away. To enter, email grabs@tntmagazine.com with “House Rules” in the subject line by noon, Wed, Aug 25.

WIN

hard house/trance

THE GARDEN PARTY PRESENTS Now in its eighth year, The Garden Party will transform The Mason’s Arms into a Balearic paradise offering up house, disco, dub and everything in-between.

» The Mason’s Arms, 665 Harrow Rd, NW10 5NU Kensal Green (020 8960 2278; themasonsarmsnw10.co.uk).

Aug 30-31, 2pm-2am. £12 HOUSE RULES If you’ve ever had the pleasure of listening to James Zabiela (pictured), you’ll have noticed the gaggle of guys hanging around the DJ booth, drooling over his mixing skills.

With a technical ability that’s spawned a million man

2-4-1 ENTRY TO THE BEST CLUBS IN LONDON

NOW ONL Y £5

GO TO TNTMAGAZINE.COM/LBB tntmagazine.com

house/garage

rock/metal

techno

crushes, his tricky fingers create some phenomenal music that just make you wanna dance. And that’s what it’s all about, folks.

» Plan B, 418 Brixton Rd, SW9 7AY Brixton (0870 116 5421; plan-brixton.co.uk). Sat, Aug 28, 9pm-6am. £12 adv

CLUB LISTINGS MONDAY 23

St, WC1A 1JJ (020 7240 1083).

9pm-3am. £5, w/flyer £3.

Hard Core Salsa DJ Mario plays mambo and salsa.

Salsa!, Charing Cross Rd, WC2H 0JG (020 7379 3277).

7pm-late. £4, free before 9pm.

I Luv Live Mighty Moe, Maverick Sabre, Soloman, RD and Daley play techno and reggae. The Queen Of Hoxton, Curtain Rd, EC2A 3JX (020 7422 0958).

7pm-midnight. £8, guestlist £5.

Carl Cox

House Rules James Zabiela, Reset Robot, Tom Budden, Cosmonauts and David Griffiths spin deep house and techno.

Plan B, Brixton Rd, SW9 4AY (020 7733 0926). 9pm-6am. £12.

BEDROCK 12 Brixton Academy, 211 Stockwell Rd, SW9 9SL Brixton (o2academy brixton.co.uk).

Oct 2. From £15 Bedrock’s coming and it’s got a super special guest to celebrate its 12th birthday. Techno don Carl Cox will be joining John Digweed at this mighty venue.

Inferno Andrew Elmore spins funk, house and dance.

The Shadow Lounge, Brewer St, W1F 0RF (020 7287 7988). 10pm3am. £10, free before 11pm.

Lost Presents Spacebase Steve Bicknell and Tomoki Tamura play house and electro.

Plastic People, Curtain Rd, EC2A 3QE (020 7739 6471). 10pm-3.30am. £8, adv £7, NUS £6 before midnight.

Minus Marc Houle, Troy Pierce and Hobo play techno. Cable, Bermondsey St, SE1 2EG (020 7403 7730).

11pm-6am. £13, adv £8 and £10.

Let’s Go Crazy In room one Major Lazer, Nero, Shy FX, Akala, Katy B and Breakage provide electro-house, with dubstep and electro in room two from Doctor P, Cookie Monsta, Dubfreaks and Modeste. The Arches, Southwark

Greek St, W1D 4DR (020 7287 372).

9pm-3.30am. £6, NUS £5, w/flyer £4.

St, SE1 1RU (020 7403 9643).

9pm-7am. £20, adv £17.

Diff’rent Strokes DJs Phat

No Heroes Psychedelic, rock, electro and punk from Von Haze, Robin Scott-Lawson and AgeEmily, plus DJ sets from The Big Pink and DEKADE. Notting Hill Arts Club, Notting Hill Gate, W11 3JQ (020 7460 4459). 7pm-2am. £8, £6 before 11pm, free before 8pm.

Cheapskates Old school hiphop, electro and disco courtesy of DJ Downfall. Moonlighting,

Socalicious DJ Spice,

Popstarz Three rooms of

Jammasters, Audio Lynx, DSI, Bliss and QT2 Hype play R’n’B and reggae. Club Colosseum, Nine

indie, pop, R’n’B and Motown.

Elms Ln, SW8 5NQ (020 7720 3609).

11pm-5am. £20, adv £5-£15.

Bear St, WC2H 7AQ (020 7839 4188).

10pm-3am. £10, £7 before 10pm, guestlist free before 10pm.

Rd, W2 6ET (020 7727 9950).

9pm-late. £10, £5 before 11pm.

Unbelievable David D

Shadow Boxer Andrew

and Eko play indie, pop and rock. The Borderline, Orange

Temptation Pop, R’n’B and cheese with resident DJs. Zoo Bar,

Rehab DJs Val, Cheeky Pete

Elmore spins 1980s dance and pop classics. The Shadow

Donaldson, Satoko, Haley and The Demonettes play indie, pop and electro. The

Lounge, Brewer St, W1F 0RF (020 7287 7988). 10pm-3am. £5, free before 11pm, mems/guestlist free.

Roxy, Rathbone Pl, W1T 1HJ (020 7255 1098). 10pm-3am. £5, NUS/w/flyer £3, £1 before 10.30pm.

Your Mum’s House Scally

Trannyshack Miss Dusty O,

Dandan and Jamie D Winter spin electro and fidget house. Punk,

Vodka Island Funky electro, house and chart courtesy of the residents. Tiger Tiger, Haymarket, SW1Y 4SP (020 7930 1885).

9pm-3am. £6, £5 before 10pm.

TUESDAY 24 Festa Fiesta Latin and samba from the resident DJs, plus salsa classes before 10pm. Fiesta Havana, Fulham Rd, SW6 5NH (020 7381 5005). 7pm-2am. £6.

GCSE Results U19 Rave Resident DJs spin drum ’n’ bass and dubstep.

Club Colosseum, Nine Elms Ln, SW8 5NQ (020 7720 3609).

10pm-5am. £15, adv £10-£13.

Madame Jo Jo’s, Brewer St, W1F 0SE (020 7734 3040).

10pm-3am. £5, w/flyer £3.

THURSDAY 26 Boom Boom Club Rock ’n’ roll cabaret from host Dusty Limits, and burlesque from Miss Vicky Butterfly. The Bathhouse, Bishopsgate Churchyard, EC2M 3TJ (020 7920 9207).

7.30pm-late. £25, adv £7.

Channel Aka & Starz Summer Party DJs spin Balearic beats and dance. IndigO2, Peninsula Sq, SE10 0DX (0871 220 0260).

7pm-late. £16.75-£27.50.

Yard, Manette St, W1D 4JB (0870 060 3777/cc 0871 231 0842).

11pm-4am. £5, w/flyer £4, NUS £3.

Soho St, W1D 3DN (020 7734 4004).

9pm-3am. £5, £3 before 11pm.

Calentito Pop, R’n’B, and soul. Salvador And Amanda, Great Newport St, WC2H 7JA (020 7240 1551). 9pm-3am. £10, guestlist £5, free before 9pm.

Dance Rocks House, R’n’B, chart, indie and 1980s and 1990s hits. The Watershed, The Broadway, SW19 1SD (020 8540 0080).

8pm-late. £8, £5 before midnight.

Frolic DJ StevieF spins party, retro pop and cheese.

Victor V and Hitman play reggae, soul and R’n’B. Orleans, Seven Sisters

ground floor, electro-house in the basement and commercial R’n’B in the VIP room. Zoo Bar,

Rd, N4 2HZ (020 7281 0611). 10.30pmlate. £4.99, £2.99 before 12.30am.

Geisha DJs Lottie and Suze

Bear St, WC2H 7AQ (020 7839 4188).

7.30pm-3am. £7, guestlist/NUS £5.

Glitz & Glamour DJ Mark

Lost In London Party on the

Replay Diego CK, Anto and Steve Nocerino play deep house.

The Den & Centro, West Central St, WC1A 1JJ (020 7240 1083).

11pm-7am. £10, ladies £5.

Bambach plays house and dance.

The Shadow Lounge, Brewer St, W1F 0RF (020 7287 7988).

10pm-3am. £5, free before 11pm, mems/guests free.

Rosser play house, funk and electro. The Bathhouse, Bishopsgate

Strictly Business The Muzik Mafia DJs spin urban and Latin sounds, including upfront R’n’B, hip-hop, 1980s and 1990s soul, reggaeton and soulful house.

Traffic, Vernon Pl, WC1A 2EP (020 3206 0011). 10pm-3am. £10.

Mode PR DJs VG, Shock,

Brewer St, W1F 0SE (020 7734 3040).

10.30pm-3am. £6, adv £5.

Psyrhythmix DJs spin psychedelic trance. Club

Bennie G, Supa Mann and Xavier Miller play R’n’B, hip-hop and funky house. Tamarai, Drury

414, Coldharbour Ln, SW9 8LF (020 7924 9322). 11pm6am. £5, £3 before midnight.

Ln, WC2B 5PG (020 7831 9399).

10pm-3am. £15, guestlist £10 before 11.30pm, ladies free before 11pm.

Submit your free listing at least three weeks prior to the publication by emailing clubs@pressassociation.com.

Peter Borg and Carlos Florez play house. Babalou Bugbar, St Matthew’s Church, SW2 1JF (020 7738 7875). 10pm-6am. £8.

Unbranded DJs Howie and Perry play commercial dance

G, Jumping Jack Frost, Krust, Artificial Intelligence, Ruffstuff and Jordan V play jungle. Plan B,

and R’n’B. Crazy Larry’s, King’s Rd, SW10 0TZ (020 7376 5555). 10pm3am. £10, guestlist £5 before 11pm.

Brixton Rd, SW9 4AY (020 7733 0926).

9pm-4am. £10, adv £8.

We Have Amazing Times

SATURDAY 28

Soul, 1980s, reggae, hip-hop and Afrobeat from DJ Clk, DJ Q and Shaq-D. Gramaphone,

Audio Sushi Indie, electro,

Commercial St, E1 6LT (020 7377 9337). 10pm-3.30am. £10.

breaks, house, drum ’n’ bass and hip-hop from DJ Disastronaut.

The Dogstar, Coldharbour Ln, SW9 8LQ (020 7733 7515).

7pm-4am. £5, free before 10pm.

Big Fancy Dress Party Residents spin R’n’B, chart and club classics. Strawberry Moons, Heddon St, W1B 4BF (020 7437 7300). 7pm-3am. £10, £8 before 10pm, £5 before 9pm, free before 8pm.

Carnival Lick Hip-hop, soul, funky house, R’n’B, garage, reggae, bashment and old school with DJs Spider, PnP and Ice. Moonlighting, Greek St, W1D 4DR (020 7287 372). 10pm-5am. £12.

Belle play glam rock and punk.

Fate Alex Under, Grun Box, Mario Reder, Alpha Channel, Krikerz, Monchhichi Boys, Sub Secret, Hugo and JP Della Camera play techno and house. Egg, York Way, N7 9AX (020 7609 8364). 10pm-6am. £12.

Girlz Gone Wild Part 4 Resident DJs play R’n’B, funky house, garage, reggae and hip-hop. Orleans, Seven Sisters

Agita Brasil Latin and samba

Simply Salacious DJ Romain,

V Records Dillinja, DJ Die, Bryan

St Moritz, Wardour St, W1F 8WL (020 7437 0525). 10pm-3.30am. £6, w/flyer/mems £5, free before 11pm.

Cross Rd, WC2H 0JG (020 7379 3277).

7.30pm-late. £4, free before 9pm.

from the resident DJs, plus dance classes before 10pm.

The Electric Ballroom, Camden High St, NW1 8QP (020 7485 9006).

10pm-3am. £10, NUS/mems £8.

The Good Foot Snowboy and Healer Selecta play funk, soul and R’n’B. Madame

White Heat DJs Matty, Marcus and Olly play indie, punk, techno and electro. Madame Jo Jo’s,

Fiesta Havana, Fulham Rd, SW6 5NH (020 7381 5005). 7pm-2am. £6.

Rooms, Arches, Miles St, SW8 1RZ (0844 736 5375). 8pm-2am. £12.50.

Decadence DJs Shuff and

Jo Jo’s, Brewer St, W1F 0SE (020 7734 3040). 10pm-3am. £8.

WEDNESDAY 25

Shake Disco and pop from DJ John Osbourne and Paul C, plus DJ Milo plays party anthems.

Churchyard, EC2M 3TJ (020 7920 9207).

11pm-4am. £7, £5 before midnight.

and reggaeton. Salsa!, Charing

Latin Krazy Salsa, bachata

disco with DJ Louise playing disco, funk, soulful house, electro and breakbeat. Renaissance

FRIDAY 27

Crazy Larry’s, King’s Rd, SW10 0TZ (020 7376 5555). 10pm-3am. £10, guestlist £5 before midnight, guestlist free before 11pm.

Credit Crunch Thursdays

St, EC2A 3HX (020 7739 5173).

9pm-3.30am. £10, adv £7.

Roller Disco Old school roller

Cat, Zay London, Lonyo and MOBO Award winner and Kiss FM DJ Manny Norte play neo soul, 1980s pop, US house, funk and R’n’B. Cherryjam, Porchester

Tasty Tim and Lady Lloyd spin commercial dance and pop.

The Den & Centro, West Central St, WC1A 1JJ (020 7240 1083).

10pm-4am. £8, free before 11pm.

Restless Soul Danny Krivit, Phil Asher, Noel Watson and Aaron Ross play house and disco. East Village, Great Eastern

Rd, N4 2HZ (020 7281 0611). 10pmlate. £10, gents £7 before 2am, £10, ladies £5 before 1am.

SUNDAY 29 Carnival Sunday Adam Freeland, Krafty Kuts and The Nextmen play electro and techno. Paradise By Way Of Kensal Green, Kilburn Ln, W10 4AE (020 8969 0098). 12noon-3am. £15.

Deadly Rhythm David Rodigan, Shy FX, Oneman and The Heatwave play dubstep, reggae and jungle. Plan B, Brixton Rd, SW9 4AY (020 7733 0926).

9pm-4am. £10, adv £8.

Get Diverted Bank Holiday Sunday Terrace Party Funk D’Void, Raymundo Rodriguez, Warren Mooney and Charlie Cantanka spin electro, techno and house. Dex Club, Brixton Rd, SW9 8HH (020 7326 4455).

4pm-6am. £5 & £8.

The London Latinfest Bank Holiday Weekender DJs spin salsa, Cuban, zouk and urban Latin, plus salsa classes. The Scala, Pentonville Rd, N1 9NL (020 7833 2022/ cc 0870 060 0100). 9.30pm-6am. £12.

South West More Layo & Bushwacka, MANDY, Evan S & Matt Gill and Steve Worrell & Matt Elphick play house, techno, electro and dance. The Ministry of Sound, Gaunt St, SE1 6DP (0870 060 2666). 11pm-6am. £15.

tntmagazine.com

MUSIC & CLUBS

Bite DJs Lydia, Ian, Marcus and Peta spin electro, indie, disco, dubstep, hip-hop and pop. The Den & Centro, West Central

TNT’S TOP BOOKING

35

news & sport

NEWS IN REVIEW

The week that was MONDAY

» TUESDAY » WEDNESDAY » THURSDAY » FRIDAY » SATURDAY » SUNDAY quote unquote

wrap up of last week’s events from australia, new zealand and south africa

“Election campaigns are gruelling.” Tony Abbott would know.

“When Sally Fletcher whips out a Glock handgun, that’s (Detective) Sam Cooper, there she is.”

Actor Marty Dingle Wall reckons his co-star Kate Ritchie, in her first role since Home and Away, will be great in the new series Cops LAC.

36

AUSTRALIA Sex fiend impregnates A sex predator impregnated two intellectually disabled teens he had abused since they were seven, the Bendigo Advertiser reported.

One girl first gave birth at 14, then later bore her attacker three more children. The other girl was 17 when she gave birth.

Dennis Alfred Goudge, 57, pleaded guilty in the County Court of Victoria to 58 sex charges on 18 boys and girls aged between three and 16.

Dingo in doo over slap Australian actor Ernie Dingo was charged with aggravated

An Aussie treat: The acting leader of the UK Labour Party, Harriet Harman, gets her paws on a lamington cake while visiting the Australian High Commission. She urged the 200,000 Australians living in London to make their vote count in the federal election.

common assault after allegedly slapping an 11-year-old boy at a West Australian school.

Dingo, 54, who was due to face Carnarvon Magistrate’s Court on October 11, allegedly slapped the boy in the face while making a presentation at the school about Aboriginal culture.

Fast food shapes up

Ernie Dingo

Pizza Hut would cut the salt in its food by 40 per cent as part of a national push to curb the rate of obesity and related diseases.

Having removed the skin from its chicken fillets in 2008, KFC promised to use cooking oil low in saturated fat from 2012.

*And finally … feisty lady strips

tntmagazine.com

Ward Drive, Fannie Bay. Fernando Dentes watched the fiery altercation unfold.

“One [woman] had the other on the ground. She was pretty much just defending herself and then she was lifting up her shirt and showing her breasts,” he said.

Police fined her, then escorted her to her home in Palmerston.

Shark attacks WA surfer A surfer was fatally attacked by a great white shark in Western Australian waters.

Gold miner and father of two, Nicholas Edwards, 31, was surfing at South Point in Cowaramup Bay, when the shark, believed to be chasing a pod of seals, tore shreds from his leg as he battled to reach the shore.

“I’m happy for everybody to get out the tick sheet and say ‘Promises made, promises delivered’.”

Julia Gillard distances herself from the broken promises of former PM Kevin Rudd.

“I was so damned nervous. She is more beautiful in real life.”

Hobart chef Daniel Toon on Princess Mary of Denmark, who, pregnant with twins, returned to visit home.

TNT er h weat rt repo

Avg min Avg max

Adelaide

7

Brisbane

12

15 21

Canberra

3

12

Darwin

21

32

Hobart

5

11

Melbourne

6

14

Perth

6

18

Sydney

8

18

Amy Fallon, Getty Images, TNT Images

Diners at a Darwin cafe were none too impressed when a woman stripped down to nothing after a full-on fist fight with another woman over a man.

The offender lay naked on the ground in front of the restaurant smoking a cigarette in full view of customers, as children were rushed inside the Cool Spot Cafe, in Dick

Bruce Perkin, chief of Yum! Restaurants, which owns the two chains, said the changes in taste did not go unnoticed by customers but it was “the right thing to do”.

“My brain snapped and I took a great leap backwards and sideways, like a Cape York cane toad.”

Aboriginal activist Gary Foley flipped out when faced with a gunman as he tended to a victim of the recent Melbourne shootings.

What’s happening across the country

SUMMARY

■ Major parties may fail to secure government in a nail-biting federal election.

■ Early results point to the first hung parliament since WWII, but Julia Gillard remains “optimistic”.

■ Australian Greens reign in the senate with nine seats to hold the balance of power.

WESTERN AUSTRALIA A man who threw an egg at Prime Minister Julia Gillard but instead hit a police officer was fined $1200 for common assault.

Enrico Robert Von Felten, from North Beach, was protesting at the ABC studios in Perth at the time.

A

ustralia’s tightest election contest in recent history went down to the wire, with indications pointing to the first hung parliament since the Second World War. As the counting of a record 10.86m ballots continued until 2am on Sunday morning, with a recount also scheduled, it looked as though neither the Labor party, nor the LiberalNational coalition had garnered enough seats to win an absolute majority.

It paved the way for the two

VICTORIA Gillard is mobbed at a Melbourne polling station

major parties to grapple over the support of at least three independent and one Greens MP in the lower house.

Despite voters in at least 15 electorates in the key states of NSW and Qld deserting Labor, incumbent Prime Minister Julia Gillard refused to concede defeat.

Coalition leader Tony Abbott, however, was jubilant, saying, “I feel humble at the responsibility that could lie ahead”.

The Greens were arguably the biggest winners, increasing their representation in the parliament to nine senators, to now hold the balance of power.

Getty Images

Greens post landmark result The Australian Greens secured a lower house seat for the first time in 106 years, when Adam Bandt snatched the seat of Melbourne from Labor hands.

Bandt, a former industrial lawyer, needed a 4.7 per cent swing to clinch the seat, but achieved 11 per cent to beat the ALP’s Cath Bowtell, who was standing in for retiring MP and former finance minister, Lindsay Tanner.

“Melbourne, together we have made history today,” Bandt declared to a screaming crowd at a Greens’ function in central Melbourne.

Bandt described winning the

COAST TO COAST

seat as like conquering Mount Everest. “How fantastic it is to have climbed it,” he said.

Bandt said his priorities were putting a price on carbon, abolishing the mandatory detention of asylum seekers and legalising same-sex marriage.

Greens senator Senator Di Natale also revelled in the Greens’ election success.

“It looks like Victoria has just gone green; we are on the verge of something very, very special,” she told supporters.

“There will be a new light on the hill, but this one will be powered by renewable energy.”

Wheat farmers were on track to produce their biggest crop in 30 years. Thanks to ideal rainfall, the projected wheat harvest was more than 3.7 million tonnes – the biggest since 1984. However, farmers still faced the worst locust plague for 75 years.

NORTHERN TERRITORY A man who followed a stranger into a hotel room and assaulted him before stealing a bag of sex toys was fined $1100.

Andrew William Shade forced his way into his victim’s room at the Value Inn, Darwin, forcing him to jump out the window.

Shade then fled with the man’s wallet and toys.

QUEENSLAND

Adam Bandt

Former champion surfer Mark Occhilupo settled a dispute out of court with his former accountant Noel Harris over shares in surfing company Billabong. Holmes claimed he gave Occhilupo $50,000 to purchase the shares, which Occhilupo insisted was a loan.

tntmagazine.com

NEWS & SPORT

Election in limbo

AUSTRALIA

37

NEW ZEALAND

The week that was

news & sport

MONDAY

38

» TUESDAY » WEDNESDAY » THURSDAY » FRIDAY » SATURDAY » SUNDAY

Barlow to get parole Convicted double-killer John Barlow was set to be released on parole this week.

The parole board, said Barlow, 64, convicted in 1995 of the execution-style killings of Wellington father and son businessmen Eugene and Gene Thomas, would be allowed to re-enter the community.

Barlow has maintained his innocence but has previously been denied parole three times.

His wife, Angela Barlow, had always been convinced of his innocence and told Radio New Zealand it was “about time” he was released.

“We’ve had so many setbacks, so we’re very, very pleased. At last we’ve got a good result,” Mrs Barlow said.

60

Pilot whales that died during a mass stranding on Karikari Beach near Kaitaia.

750 Crowned: Prime Minister John Key and courts minister Georgina te Heuheu are welcomed by Maori chiefs at the coronation ceremony for the fourth year of rule of Maori King Tuheitia Paki at the Turangawaewae Marae in Ngaruawahia.

year that both spellings would be official, although the change had yet to be gazetted by Parliament.

“This has not stopped media – Fairfax, TV3 News and Radio New Zealand being most prominent – in wrongly naming and pronouncing our city and district’s name,” Laws said.

Three dead in sinking

Michael Laws

Three people died and three were missing after a Korean-registered fishing vessel sunk 800km off the southeast coast of Dunedin.

The Oyang 70 was apparently hauling in fishing gear when it capsized and sank within 10 minutes, forcing the 51 crew

members to abandon ship in frigid waters.

The New Zealand Government was running an investigation into exactly what caused the ship to sink.

Lincoln tops cheat list Students at Lincoln University in Christchurch were revealed as the worst cheats in the country.

Lincoln had 1.76 cases for every 100 students, figures released to The Press under the Official Information Act showed.

Waikato University had 0.97 cases for every 100 students.

Victoria University had 0.38, and AUT recorded 0.29.

*And finally … Escape was tonic for Jin

tntmagazine.com

was captured on Rangitoto Island and subsequently transferred to Christchurch’s Willowbank Wildlife Reserve.

“Our keepers noted that she was a feisty animal, always ready to try to nibble at their boots when they were caught unawares – they learnt to become ever more vigilant at these tactics over the years,” the zoo said.

Dollars that Sascha Krueger was fined – and is refusing to pay – for skateboarding down New Street in Nelson.

23

Candidates who have put their hands up to become mayor of the new Auckland super– city, which will be decided during local elections in October.

63

Percentage of public servants who report misconduct when they see it, according to a survey by the State Services Commission.

100

Jobs to be cut at the Ministry of Education as part of a strategy to improve student outcomes and services.

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Celeb: Jin the Otter

Avg min Avg max

Auckland

9

14

Wellington

5

11

Christchurch

3

8

Dunedin

3

8

Getty Images, NZPA/Ross Setford

One of Auckland’s most famous escapees of the past decade died in Wellington Zoo. Jin, the mischievous shortclawed Asiatic otter became a national celebrity in 2006 when she escaped from Auckland Zoo and spent 26 days on the run in various locations around Waitemata Harbour.

After 26 days of freedom, Jin

64K

Babies born in NZ in the year to June, 2 per cent more than the year before, according to Statistics New Zealand.

Laws ‘H’ complaint Wanganui mayor Michael Laws said he would complain to the Press Council and Broadcasting Standards Authority about media calling the town Whanganui.

The Government decided last

WEEK IN NUMBERS

ACT makes a scene

UPPER NORTH ISLAND

T

Happier times: Rodney Hide with Heather Roy

him things, “including a rumour about drug use”.

“I can emphatically say that I have never approached any minister with concerns about drug use by Heather Roy,” Hide said.

Roy was voted out of her deputy leadership role and replaced by John Boscawen.

Her notes, leaked to the media,

showed her anguish as her relationship with Hide deteriorated. “He routinely tries to bully and intimidate me … ”, the notes said.

The 82-page notes said Hide’s attitude at meetings with her had been “menacing” and she believed he was trying to get her out of parliament.

Hide rejected the allegations.

Getty Images

Peters has eyes for Key seat electorate. But, despite not having come to a party decision on contesting seats, he did not deny Helensville was a possibility.

The electorate, which Key has a strong hold on, was an “interesting proposition” and campaigning there would force Key to “turn up and have a debate”, he said.

TV3 reported that it had sources confirming Peters would contest the seat.

Key later told 3 News: “I’ve always fronted up to the locals and I look forward to that, talking to them. I don’t really care about Winston.”

One of Auckland’s oldest hotels is about to take a hike up a Freeman’s Bay hill as engineers excavate the new Victoria Park tunnel as part of motorway extensions through the city. The Birdcage, built in 1885, will be moved 40m up the street. When the work is finished, the 125-year-old hotel will be moved back on to its original site.

LOWER NORTH ISLAND Two Hawkes Bay men accused of packing 14 stolen sheep into a car were jailed for 10 months. John Richard Kaka and Jonathan David Dunick will have to pay $4500 in reparation after being sentenced in Hastings District Court.

UPPER SOUTH ISLAND A 12-year-old boy was seriously injured when he was hit by a 4WD after getting off a Nelson school bus. Police said the boy ran on to the road in front of the bus and was hit by the 4WD.

LOWER SOUTH ISLAND

Key challenger?: Winston Peters

A restaurant on a quiet stretch of the Waitaki Plains in North Otago has been voted New Zealand’s best. Riverstone Kitchen, 12km from Oamaru, was named supreme winner of the Cuisine Magazine NZ Restaurant of the Year Awards.

tntmagazine.com

NEWS & SPORT

■ ACT’s deputy leader Heather Roy is ousted and replaced by John Boscawen.

■ ACT leader Rodney Hide denies allegations he defamed Roy and claimed she used drugs.

■ Roy said Hide bullied her, but Hide denies the charge.

New Zealand political stalwart Winston Peters may take on Prime Minister John Key for the Helensville seat at next year’s election.

But Key said he didn’t care and questioned whether Peters would still lead New Zealand First at that time.

Peters was in campaign mode while speaking to students at Wellington’s Victoria University, urging them to consider signing up as New Zealand First members.

He said he was settled in Auckland and re-affirmed he would not stand for next year’s election in his old Tauranga

COAST TO COAST What’s happening across the country

SUMMARY

he ACT party’s dirty laundry was hung out to dry in public last week after attempts to keep their party implosion under wraps failed.

In parliament, leader Rodney Hide rebutted claims he had made defamatory statements about ousted deputy leader Heather Roy to defence minister Wayne Mapp, including about drug use.

Labour MPs taunted Hide with allegations made by Roy that he approached Mapp on more than one occasion to tell

NEW ZEALAND

39

SOUTH AFRICA

The week that was

news & sport

MONDAY

40

» TUESDAY » WEDNESDAY » THURSDAY » FRIDAY » SATURDAY » SUNDAY

Strikes get violent Public sector strikes escalated into violence as police fired rubber bullets at protestors causing disruption in schools, hospitals and among motorists across the country.

Meanwhile, military medics were deployed to cover staff shortages at hospitals.

Unions affiliated with the Congress of SA Trade Unions said they would strike until the government met demands for an 8.6 per cent salary hike and R1000 housing subsidy.

Auto workers returned to their jobs after an eight-day walkout when General Motors Co and other car manufacturers offered a 10 per cent salary increase.

A bit too rock ‘n’ roll Ard Matthews, the dreadlocked lead singer of South African rock band Just Jinjer, was arrested in Cape Town after driving his bakkie into a pavement.

Matthews was charged with drink-driving but the charge was dropped, pending the results of blood-tests which

850

Tilapia fish in a private dam, owned by Garth Oberem of Amalinda, that died due to water pollution.

300k Action: The South African film, Themba – A Boy Called Hope, scooped the Unicef Child Rights award at the 2010 Zanzibar International Film Festival. Directed by Stefanie Sycholt, who is pictured here with crew during filming in Port St John, Eastern Cape, the film follows a football-mad boy’s triumphs against adversity.

could take up to six months. He was released on R500 bail.

Homebuyers unfazed The security of a house was now of greater concern to homebuyers than incidence of crime, a property group found.

“It’s as if South African home buyers now see crime as part of everyday life,” Gerhard Kotzé, of ERA South Africa, said.

More than 650,000 whites aged 16 years and older had no income whatsoever, the Bureau for Market Research found.

Around Pretoria there were

more than 70 informal white settlements.

Freedom Front Plus chief whip Corné Mulder accused the government of failing to offer help evenly among poor black and white communities.

It’s who you know Imperial, a company led by Jacob Zuma’s son, Duduzane, was set to receive R9.08bn worth of shares in the SA subsidiary of global steel company ArcelorMittal, in a deal that ‘complied’ with the black economic empowerment policy. Some of Zuma’s friends were reportedly also to benefit after ‘facilitating’ the deal.

State-owned households involved in the Limpopo government’s ‘My RDP – My Pride’ campaign to encourage owners to value their properties.

10

Years warrant-officer Motlalepule Amos Motaung will spend in jail for murdering his mistress, Mavis Mofokeng, in the house he shared with his wife.

3

Pairs of conjoined twins born in the Mthatha area, Johannesburg in the past six months.

354m

Profit in rand made by the once-beleagured Land Bank.

TNT er th weaport re

Avg min Avg max

Johannesburg 7

23

9

25

Pretoria

9

17

13

24

East London 12

23

Bloemfontein 2

21

Port Elizabeth 12

21

Cape Town Durban

TNT Images, Getty Images

word’s out: The vuvuzela has made it into the Oxford Dictionary of English.

It’s described as a “long plastic instrument, in the shape of a trumpet that makes a very loud noise when it is blown and is popular with football fans in South Africa”.

tntmagazine.com

7

Percentage increase in public servants’ wages offered by the government, an offer rejected by unions.

Poverty hits whites

Ard Matthews

WEEK IN NUMBERS

GRAND FINAL

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SOUTH AFRICA v AUSTRALIA SOUTH AFRICA v AUSTRALIA AUSTRALIA v ALL BLACKS NEW ZEALAND v AUSTRALIA

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CLAPHAM JUNCTION 49 Lavender Gardens, Clapham Junction SW11 1DJ 0207 228 3744

Sporting week MONDAY

RUGBY LEAGUE Dual international Mat Rogers hangs up his boots. Rogers, 34, started with Cronulla before switching codes with the NSW Waratahs and then returning to league on the Gold Coast.

TUESDAY

AFL Adelaide Crows defender Nathan Bock becomes the first player to announce a move to the Gold Coast Suns next year.

Bock, 27, was the All-Australian centre half-back in 2007. Judas.

WEDNESDAY

FOOTBALL Aussie keeper Brad Jones joins Liverpool from Middlesbrough in a £2.3m move. Jones, 28, left the Socceroos at the World Cup when his son was diagnosed with leukemia.

THURSDAY

AFL Essendon coach Matthew Knights insists he will see out his contract, which ties him to the club until the end of 2012, despite speculation that his job could be in jeopardy.

THE

FRIDAY

SWIMMING Stephanie Rice, who won three Olympic golds for Australia in 2008, pulls out of this year’s Commonwealth Games in Delhi, blaming an injured shoulder that needs surgery.

SATURDAY

FOOTBALL South African winger Steven Pienaar looks set to stay at Everton, with Toffees manager David Moyes saying it would take a “sackload of cash” to persuade him to sell Pienaar.

SUNDAY

MONDAY FOOTBALL Man City v Liverpool Another early blockbuster 7pm Sky Sports 1

ON THE

BOX

TUESDAY FOOTBALL Sevilla v Braga Champions League qualifiers 7pm Sky Sports 2

ON THE

BOX

WEDNESDAY FOOTBALL Tottenham v Young Boys More Champions League 8pm ITV1

BOX

ON THE

WATER POLO The Aussie women’s side lose 6-3 to the USA in the final of the World Cup in Christchurch.

Australia allow their opponents to take a 6-0 lead, which they care unable to reel in.

Probably just as “ a bloke who never put a foot wrong ”

Retiring Aussie rules star Ben Cousins on how he’d like to be remembered.

Cheeky to the last. Good luck, Benny.

THURSDAY CRICKET England v Pakistan First day of the fourth Test 10.30am Sky Sports 1 FRIDAY FOOTBALL Atletico Madrid v Inter It’s the UEFA Super Cup 7.30pm ITV4

SATURDAY RUGBY UNION South Africa v Australia Facing off for second spot 4pm Sky Sports 4 SUNDAY RUGBY UNION Aston Villa v Everton Football coming out your ears 3.30pm Sky Sports 1

PUB TALK: BRITISH SPORT EXPLAINED

Getty Images

Beckham to Blackburn?

Is this for real?

Well, it’s speculative. Indian billionaire Ahsan Ali Syed is bidding to buy Blackburn Rovers and, as part of his pitch, has promised an £80m spending spree on players and claims he would try to sign 35-yearold David Beckham.

Are Blackburn any good?

They won the Premier League back in 1994-95, when Alan Shearer was the man, but were relegated four seasons later.

Since returning to the top flight in 2001-02, they’ve been solidly mid-table. It’s worth remembering that Man City were ordinary before their Abu Dhabi sheikhs bought in.

tntmagazine.com

NEWS & SPORT

ON BOX

Tom Sturrock picks his winners and losers

43

RUGBY Ma’a Nonu was at his pack-splitting best

I missed “ a tackle that

NEWS & SPORT

led to one of the late tries and we were punished for too many silly mistakes

”

44

Springboks skipper John Smit marks himself hard after failing to get a win in his 100th Test.

THE PLAYER

Schalk Burger

All Blacks roll on South Africa 22 S Burger try M Steyn con 5 pens

v

29 New Zealand T Woodcock R McCaw I Dagg tries D Carter con pen

New Zealand scored two tries in the final three minutes to snatch a thrilling victory over South Africa and clinch the Tri-Nations title. Richie McCaw dived over in one corner and Israel Dagg in the other as the Springboks slumped to a heart-breaking loss.

It was also a memorable day for All Blacks fly-half Dan Carter, whose third penalty goal 29 minutes into the first half raised his Test tally to a world-record 1113 points, overtaking England pivot Jonny Wilkinson.

Morne Steyn was back to his goal-kicking best and a couple of successful penalty kicks gave the Springboks a 22-14 lead with 15 minutes to go before Carter kept his team

in contention with a fourth penalty. The All Blacks pivot failed with another shot at goal six minutes from full-time but the visitors piled on the pressure as they closed on a fifth straight win in this year’s tournament.

A dramatic climax saw McCaw and Dagg touch down with Carter converting the second as the All Blacks completed a hat-trick over the Boks after wins in Auckland and Wellington.

It raised to 14 the number of consecutive Test wins by the All Blacks since falling at home to the Springboks last year in the Tri-Nations.

The record is 18 wins, held by Lithuania – to better this mark, the All Blacks must defeat Australia in Sydney and Hong Kong; then England in London, Scotland in Edinburgh and Ireland in Dublin during their November Grand Slam tour of Europe.

SOUTH AFRICA There were plenty of outstanding contributions in a high-quality match and the Boks flanker was fantastic in the tackle throughout. His try, scored through brute, burrowing force, explemified his side’s desperation for a Tri-Nations win that again proved elusive.

THE TABLE Team

New Zealand Australia South Africa

W 5 1 0

L 0 2 4

BP 3 0 1

PD PTS 72 23 -14 4 -58 1

ON THE BOX FRIDAY 4pm Sky Sports 4 SOUTH AFRICA V AUSTRALIA

ARU sweating as Cooper ponders switch

tntmagazine.com

Parramatta, however, are reportedly convinced Cooper intends to play in the NRL at some stage and have offered him a three-year deal that could see him earn seven figures through third-party deals.

The notion that Cooper is keen to switch codes was lent further credence by injured Wallaby Stephen Hoiles.

“I genuinely think Quade has a desire to play rugby league,” Hoiles said. ”I’m certain that if he doesn’t sign with the Eels this time, that after the World Cup in a couple of years, he’ll be playing rugby league at some stage.”

Quade Cooper

Getty Images

In-demand Quade Cooper last week left for South Africa with his Wallabies teammates with his playing future still up in the air. The fly-half is weighing up whether to sign a new deal with the Australian Rugby Union (ARU) or switch codes to take up a lucrative offer from NRL club Parramatta.

The ARU had initially offered Cooper, 22, a three-year deal worth $360,000 annually but have bumped that up to a guaranteed $500,000 per year, with scope for Cooper to earn an additional $180,000 in match payments if he plays every Test for Australia next year.

Everyone “ keeps telling

NRL

ROUND 24

Manly’s Glenn Stewart offloads

NEWS & SPORT

us where we’d be but at the end of the day it doesn’t mean anything

”

45

Storm coach Craig Bellamy after hearing his side would be in the top four if not for cap breaches.

THE PLAYER

Cooper Vuna KNIGHTS After a week when there was plenty of chat about Quade Cooper’s mooted switch to rugby league, Vuna, who is heading the other way to join the Melbourne Rebels next season, produced a four-try performance that suggests the NRL may be losing a real talent.

Manly scrape home Sea Eagles 19 T Williams 2 S Matai tries J Lyon 2 S Matai goals T Hodkinson field goal

Team Dragons Tigers Panthers Titans Sea Eagles Roosters Warriors Broncos Raiders Rabbitohs Knights Eels Bulldogs Sharks Cowboys Storm*

P 22 22 22 21 22 21 22 22 22 22 22 22 22 22 22 22

M Gordon 3 T Burns 2 S Earl 2 M Iosefa S McKendry tries M Gordon 9 goals

W L 15 7 14 8 13 9 13 8 12 10 12 9 12 10 11 11 11 11 10 12 10 12 10 12 8 14 6 16 5 17 13 9

PD 117 25 112 24 57 32 7 7 -40 23 -32 -56 -45 -231 -188 108

PTS 34 32 30 30 28 28 28 26 26 24 24 24 20 16 14 0

* Storm unable to earn any points this season as punishment for salary cap breaches

Getty Images

Roosters v Titans

Round 25 games

Warriors v Broncos, Rabbitohs v Eels, Sharks v Titans, Knights v Dragons, Raiders v Cowboys, Bulldogs v Panthers, Tigers v Storm, Roosters v Sea Eagles

J Maloney S Mannering tries J Maloney 4 goals

v

18 Rabbitohs L Capewell D Farrell R Wesser tries C Sandow 3 goals

South Sydney’s finals hopes disintegrated under the weight of the Penrith steamroller.

Full-back Michael Gordon scored a club-record 30 points, courtesy of a hat-trick of tries and nine goals, breaking Penrith’s single-season points record in the process.

Cowboys 20 T Williams 2 G Rovelli J Williams tries J Williams 2 goals

v

22 Bulldogs M Ennis J Idris J Morris S Turner tries B Goodwin 3 goals

The Cowboys were mowed down as the Dogs crossed three times in four minutes. Michael Ennis darted over to spark the comeback and Bryson Goodwin scored off the next set, before Steve Turner levelled the scores and slotted the match-winning sideline conversion.

Raiders 32

Sunday night game

16 Warriors

The pre-match chat was all about the clash between two star wingers, Manly’s Tony Williams against New Zealand’s Manu Vatuvei. The Sea Eagles speedster stole the show with a try either side of half-time, but it was little Trent Hodkinson who proved Panthers 54

THE TABLE

v

G Buttriss T Campese J Dugan A Mogg J Picker D Vidot tries J Croker 4 goals

v

16 Dragons N Costigan M Gasnier B Morris tries J Soward 2 goals

The Dragons defence was sensational in the first half but the persistent Raiders attack saw the floodgates eventually open in the final 40 minutes. Canberra’s victory was their third consecutive win and keeps them well in the hunt for an unlikely top-eight finish.

Manly’s hero, his late field goal handing the Sea Eagles a thrilling win that keeps them right in the mix for a top-four finish.

The scores were tied 16-all with four minutes remaining, when Hodkinson calmly slotted the crucial point – he nabbed two late one-pointers earlier in the season to pinch a win over South Sydney – before Manly skipper Jamie Lyon added a penalty after full-time.

Knights 44 C Vuna 4 I De Gois K Gidley A MacDougall A Uate tries K Gidley 6 goals

v

18 Broncos J Hoffman A McCullough I Folau tries C Parker 3 goals

The Broncos are in danger of missing the finals for the first time since 1991 after Cooper Vuna became the fourth Knights player – Darren Albert, Andrew Johns and Adam MacDougall also did it – to cross four times in a game as the Knights produced their best display of the year.

Storm 24 R Hinchcliffe D Nielsen S Manu C Smith tries C Smith 4 goals

v

4 Sharks L Covell try

The Storm may be playing solely for pride but showed remain a cut above the Sharks.

The Storm set up a 6-0 lead at half-time after skipper Cameron Smith crossed and tightened the screws after the restart, tries to Sika Manu and Dane Nielsen securing the victory.

Eels 18 J Horo K Inu A Mitchell tries L Burt 3 goals

v

20 Tigers B Ryan 2 C Lawrence A Fifita tries B Marshall 2 goals

Trailing 20-6 with just 11 minutes left, the Eels stormed back into the game via tries to Justin Horo and Anthony Mitchell but were unable to conjure one last piece of magic. Luke Burt, the league’s most accurate goal-kicker, missed a simple shot on goal in the final minute.

tntmagazine.com

AFL

ROUND 21

It’s not a “ tap, you can’t

NEWS & SPORT

expect to turn it on just before you run down the race

”

46

Magpies coach Mick Malthouse reckons his side weren’t fully switched on against Adelaide.

Hawks corral Docker Rhys Palmer

Hawks discover form Hawks 24.11.155 L Franklin 5 J Roughead 4 S Burgoyne 4 C Rioli 3 J Lewis 2 B Whitecross 2 C Bateman L Hodge S Gilham X Ellis

v

5.9.39 Dockers M Johnson 2 R Murphy 2 D Roberton

Collingwood, Geelong and St Kilda may be a cut above the rest but, in thrashing Fremantle, Hawthorn sent a clear signal that, of the sides in the bottom half of the eight, they are most likely to bob up and crash the party.

The 2008 premiers were devastating, kicking Cats 18.13.121 G Ablett 4 J Podsiadly 4 D Menzel 3 T Hawkins 2 J Bartel M Stokes S Johnson S Byrnes T Varcoe

v

12.7.79 Blues L Henderson 3 M Robinson 3 J Waite 3 K Simpson C Judd R Warnock

Carlton threatened intermittently against Geelong, closing to within 12 points midway through the third term, but the Cats had all the answers and eventually pulled clear to win comfortably. Geelong’s midfield held sway, with James Bartel and Joel Selwood the stars.

Magpies 6.18.54 D Thomas 2 L Brown 2 A Didak T Cloke

v

Bombers 10.8.68

v

J Koschitzke 5 N Riewoldt 3 B Goddard 2 N Dal Santo J Gram 2 A Pattison D Armitage L Montagna S Milne

v

14.10.94 Tigers J Riewoldt 7 J King 3 T Cotchin 2 K Moore T Taylor

With 21-year-old full-forward Jack Riewoldt effectively sewing up the Coleman Medal, Richmond were right in the hunt for the first three quarters. The Saints, however, kicked the first four goals of the final term to establish a buffer that the Tigers were unable to overturn.

Swans 17.12.114

T Walker 2 I Maric K Tippett R Henderson S Stevens W Young

T Dennis-Lane 4 J Bolton 2 B Kirk 2J McVeigh 2 K Jack 2 L Jetta 2 P Bevan 2 J White

v

10.10.70 Bulldogs B Hall 2 B Hudson 2 J Grant 2 N Eagleton 2 L Gilbee L Jones

The Swans set up a thumping win – one that may land them a home final – with the first six goals of the second quarter, leaving the Dogs, who looked solid a month ago, utterly devoid of momentum heading into September. Veteran Swans midfielder Jude Bolton was best afield.

14.11.95 Lions

Power 17.10.112

J Brown 4 T Banfield 3 M Rischitelli 2 J Adcock J Brennan J Polkinghorne J Redden M Clark

J Schulz 5 R Gray 3 T Boak 3 C Hitchcock D Pearce D Stewart M Broadbent M Thomas P Stewart

v

11.17.83 Demons L Jurrah 4 A Wonaeamirri 2 B Green J McDonald J Watts L Dunn T Scully

A seven-goal third quarter set up the win for the Power, who have now managed to win four of their past five games – had it not been for a horror mid-season run of nine staight losses, they would be in contention for a finals berth.

Power midfielder Travis Boak was best afield

Brett Kirk SWANS The superstars have the power to thrill, but it’s often the guys who wring every last drop from modest talents that become cult figures. So it was with Brett Kirk, who was deservedly chaired from the ground after his final game at the SCG.

THE LADDER Team Magpies Cats Saints Bulldogs Swans Dockers Hawks Blues Roos Power Demons Crows Lions Bombers Tigers Eagles

P 21 21 21 21 21 21 21 21 20 21 21 21 21 21 21 20

W 17 16 15 13 12 12 11 11 9 9 8 8 7 7 6 4

L 3 5 5 8 9 9 9 10 11 12 12 13 14 14 15 16

D 1 0 1 0 0 0 1 0 0 0 1 0 0 0 0 0

% 145 147 124 125 107 104 111 109 85 81 95 93 83 81 72 78

PTS 70 64 62 52 48 48 46 44 36 36 34 32 28 28 24 16

Sunday night game Eagles v Roos

ON THE BOX FRIDAY 11.30am ESPN CROWS V SAINTS

SATURDAY 10am ESPN BULLDOGS V BOMBERS

Other Round 22 games Dockers v Blues, Cats v Eagles, Hawks v Magpies, Lions v Swans, Tigers v Power, Demons v Roos

Getty Images

The beleagured Bombers, with coach Matthew Knights under mounting pressure, desperately needed a win but again came up short. The Lions led all day and only six goals in the last quarter to the Bombers and the inaccuracy of Lions gun Jon Brown prevented a thrashing.

tntmagazine.com

Saints 17.13.115

7.9.54 Crows

Collingwood sewed up the minor premiership with a slogging win over the Crows but were not nearly as convincing as they would have liked. Adelaide led at the first three changes but the Magpies drew level in the final term before a string of behinds got them home.

K Reimers 2 A Monfries B Howlett B Stanton D Hille D Myers J Carlisle J Neagle M Marigliani

12 goals to one in the first half to leave the Dockers on their knees two weeks from finals.

Importantly for Hawthorn, their key players fired; Shaun Burgyone was dominant, racking up 38 touches and booting four goals, while Cyril Rioli, Sam Mitchell and Luke Hodge were all busy through the middle. Maybe this was a one-off for the Hawks, or maybe they’ve found their best form at exactly the right time.

THE PLAYER

cricket

NEWS & SPORT

Smith resigns as T20 skipper

48

South African skipper Graeme Smith has stepped aside as T20 captain with immediate effect and will abdicate his captaincy of the 50-over team after next year’s World Cup.

Smith, 29, became South Africa’s youngest ever captain when he took over the reins at the tender age of 22.

“I am going into my ninth season of international cricket,” Smith said. “I would like to play cricket for another five or six years, and I know in my heart I can only do that if I give up some of my current responsibilities.

“It has always been my philosophy to make the Proteas the best team we can possibly be, but also to enable the players to grow both as cricketers and as people.

“I believe we have now reached the stage where there are several players emerging

icc awards announced The nominations for the ICC’s annual awards contain a few surprises, with Aussies Doug Bollinger, Ryan Harris, Mitchell Johnson, Ricky Ponting, Michael Clarke and Shane Watson all nominated for player of the year. South Africans Dale Steyn, AB de Villiers, Hashim Amla, Morne Morkel and Jacques Kallis were also nominated, as was Kiwi skipper Daniel Vettori.

within the squad to take on leadership roles.”

Smith said he would remain available for selection in all three formats and would have no problem playing under another captain.

A new T20 captain will be named before South Africa face Zimbabwe in October and AB de Villiers, 26, looms as an early front-runner.

Smith will remain available for selection in all formats

Katich admits batting worries

Weather intervened two days in a row to ruin New Zealand’s ODI against Sri Lanka in Dambulla, leaving the triangular series – also featuring India – delicately balanced ahead of the final on Saturday.

The match was originally scheduled for Thursday, but no play was possible due to persistent rain. On Friday, Sri Lanka won the toss and faced nearly 44 overs before the weather turned and forced the match to be abandoned, with the teams splitting the points.

New Zealand were fortunate as Sri Lanka were on track for a big score when the heavens opened. They were already

Australian opener Simon Katich has conceded that flaky batting performances loom as Australia’s major weakness ahead of the Ashes series, which begins in Brisbane on November 25.

The Australians were rolled for low scores against West Indies in Perth last year, against Pakistan in Sydney in January and at Headingley in July.

“Being brutally honest, it’s still been a problem because it’s happened a couple of times since the Ashes,” Katich said.

“Until we can rectify that in a match, that’s going to be still hanging over our heads, and unfortunately you can’t replicate it in the nets.”

Ross Taylor and Nathan McCullum

tntmagazine.com

3-203 with Mahela Jayawardene and Chamara Silva looking to accelerate the scoring.

Depending on the result of Sri Lanka’s final match against India, New Zealand and India could find themselves in a virtual elimination final on Wednesday.

Meanwhile, New Zealand skipper Daniel Vettori, who is being rested during the current series, could be in for a busy night at his country’s annual awards night, which will be held next month.

Vettori has been nominated for best first-class batsman, first-class bowler, ODI batsman, ODI bowler and best all-rounder.

Getty Images

Kiwis rained out twice in a week

GENERAL Mark Webber and Sebastian Vettel after the Hungarian Grand Prix

THE QUOTES

“We hadn’t heard from them until we inserted a guideline which threatens their opportunity to cheat.”

NRL boss David Gallop on player agents’ resistance to statutory declarations in player contracts.

Webber heads to Spa Mark Webber will be looking to cement his hold on first place in the Formula One drivers’ championship by winning the Belgian Grand Prix in Spa-Francorchamps when the season resumes this weekend.

Webber is just four points ahead of 2008 champion, Briton Lewis Hamilton of McLaren, with seven races remaining

but is in the form of his career.

The Australian, however, is determined not to allow the widespread praise and optimism to go to his head as he looks ahead to a title run-in that will test him to the limits in one of the most hotly-contested drivers’ championships for years.

“We’ve shown this year that the car is performing on all

tracks so we hope we don’t have any weak circuits ahead now,” Webber said.

“We’re a little bit worried about how the long straights might go at some of the other venues, at maybe Monza.

“But the car is very, very strong at most tracks so we’re ready to take on anyone at any venue and I’m looking forward to all the races coming up.”

Getty Images

Stosur and Hewitt eyeing Open

Samantha Stosur

Australia’s top two tennis players, Samantha Stosur and Lleyton Hewitt are completing their preparations for the US Open, which begins next week.

Stosur, the world No 6, had her hopes of a breakthrough Glam Slam victory boosted when three-time winner Serena Williams withdrew from the event with injury.

Stosur, who has missed two tournaments with an arm injury, is set to play in Connecticut this week, before heading to New York.

“My arm has been giving me trouble for about a year now. It seems to be worse on the hard courts for some reason,” Stosur wrote on her

website. “I need to think about my tennis career, not just the next couple of tournaments, so that is why I agreed with the doctors to take 10 days off and focus on getting ready for the US Open.’’

Hewitt, on the other hand, has played his last tournament before the season’s final major, losing in three tight sets to world No 5 Robin Soderling at last week’s Cincinatti Masters.

Meanwhile, both Hewitt and Stosur have pulled out of the Commonwealth Games, to be held in Delhi in October, because of clashes in their tournament schedules.

Australia’s highest-ranked player will be Russian-born Anastasia Rodionova.

“It’s sort of like Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, and he’s Willy Wonka and Richmond are the chocolate factory and we’re the kids going through the factory. There’s just that little bit of magic in the air.” Richmond fullforward Jack Riewoldt on coach Damien Harwick.

Who are the OompaLoompas? Anyone?

“When he writes, a player has told me to ‘F off’, saying that I was no value to the Socceroos any more.

I find that a little bit harsh.” Harry Kewell (below) responds angrily to a column written by former Socceroo Robbie Slater claiming Kewell is no longer good enough to play for Australia.

tntmagazine.com

NEWS & SPORT

“The difference with England now is they have guys who are consistent performers, not who do it now and again.” Aussie all-rounder Shane Watson talks up England – before they lost to Pakistan.

49

CAREERS & MONEY 50

tntmagazine.com

CAREERS CAREERS & MONEY

so my husband and I decided to set up our own business.

What do you do day-to-day?

My husband is the plumber and I do everything else.

That includes business development, diary management, marketing and financial record-keeping. You need to muck in and do whatever needs to be done.

What’s the best thing about your job?

ON THE JOB ANNE TIMPANY Career Co-owner of plumbing and heating company ‘On Tap Plumbers’ Age 31 Lives St Albans From Timaru, New Zealand How did you get into your line of work?

I had been doing marketing and business development for over six years in the hospitality and events industry in London.

In 2009, I was made redundant,

Meeting new people – I thought running my own business would be lonely but I have never been as social in my career as I am now. I attend a number of networking events, such as ones put on by NZ Business Women’s Network, which have put me in touch with a number of inspiring and interesting entrepreneurs.

The IT kids aren’t OK

What’s the most challenging part of your job?

I

Juggling my workload. I have a lot of responsibility and at the moment we are a small, growing business so we need to do as much of the work ourselves as we can.

OFFICE GURU Samantha Baden

Getty Images

TACKLES YOUR CAREER DRAMAS

Can I use social media to find a job?

Yes, you can and you should.

Most people already know that these days the best way to find a job is through networking – meeting people, impressing them and selling yourself. The same applies to social media.

Recruiters are already

reporting that Facebook and Twitter are the best way to promote staffing needs. But don’t forget the more overt business networking tools like Linkedin – it’s free and top professionals are on there. It’s also a good idea to set up a blog and sell yourself as an expert in your field. You’ll have a new job in no time.

51

n New Zealand, young IT whizzkids have been among the hardest hit by the global economic downturn and its knock-on effects on the Kiwi job market, with Gen Y wunderkinds forced to take a back seat to more experienced professionals.

Michelle Pearson, IT division manager New Zealand at Randstad, told the National Business Review that Gen Y job seekers “probably got a shock” when the employment market

suddenly shifted to an employer-driven environment.

“They couldn’t be as demanding as they might have been in previous years,” Pearson said. “New entry developers used to start on salaries that would now be equivalent to that of a more senior position.“

NSW CREATES JOBS

JOBLESS RECOVERY

New labour force figures show more jobs were created in NSW than in Victoria last month.

National unemployment rose to 5.3 per cent in July, seasonally adjusted, according to the Australian Bureau of Statistics (ABS).

Despite some employers in London’s financial services warning of a ‘jobless recovery’ from the recession, recruitment consultant Morgan McKinley claims job vacancies in the City rose 7 per cent in July as firms moved to replace lost staff.

tntjobs.co.uk Sign up for job alerts and get more career advice at tntjobs.co.uk

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ski it to

believe it Earn money while making the most of the winter season on the slopes WORDS ASHLEY BARFOROUSH

T

he slopes are calling, but so is the bank. Before setting the skis aside to look for a job, why not apply to work for a season in a resort and turn your passion into pounds.

WARM UP Snow lovers rejoice: dozens of resorts and companies in Europe are now recruiting and France’s Ski Amis is no exception.

“We don’t have a closing date,” director Christine Van Zadelhoff says. “We’re just continually recruiting this summer until all the jobs have been filled.”

There are 50 positions available at their

locations in the French Alps and only one round of interviews has been completed so far.

WORK IT If you work to live and live to ski, this job is right up your mountain.

Most staff on the slopes don’t have a passion for scrubbing toilets but, demand being what it is, many put their hands up for cleaning jobs, which means they work in the mornings and ski or board in the afternoons.

Expect to roll up your sleeves six days a week, for 35-45 hours in total.

NO EXPERIENCE NECESSARY No experience? No worries. To be a chalet host all you need is a good smile and work ethic.

“We prefer to have people that have not done this job before as then we can train them in our way,” Van Zadelhoff says.

Hosts will be required to get down and dirty because they make the magic happen. They make beds, meals and customers happy. It may be the most monotonous job on the mountain, but it’s also the most available.

WHERE IN THE WORLD CHECK OUT THE FOLLOWING COMPANIES AND GET RECRUITED Ski Amis – France skiamis.com Reberty Village Resort – France skifamille.co.uk/reberty.php Purple Ski – France purpleski.com CCUSA – Internship, USA or Canada ccusa.com Powder White – Austria, France, Switzerland powderwhite.com

Mark Warner Ltd – Austria, France markwarner.co.uk/ski Ski63 – France ski63.com Meriski – France meriski.co.uk YSE – France yseski.co.uk Gap Year Academy gapyearacademy.com EA Ski & Snowboard Training ski-snowboard-training educatingadventures.com

ary Food for thought: trade your culin ntain mou the on time skills for free

CAREERS & MONEY 53

Snow business: resorts like Chamonix always need workers

COOK UP A PLAN If you’re an expert on the slopes and in the kitchen, a chalet chef’s hat might be just your size. Cook three-course meals, six days a week and you’ll earn the right to ski in your down time.

Maybe you’re better behind the bar than the stove. Resorts are always looking for experienced bartenders. After all, a hydrated skier is a happy one.

If mixing drinks isn’t your cup of tea, chalet restaurants always need helpful hands to serve up a good time to the guests.

TNT Images, Office de Tourisme de Chamonix

HEALTHY ALTERNATIVE Relieve the guests’ aching muscles before exercising your own – off duty. Work in the chalet spa as a beauty therapist or masseuse. It could be just what the doctor ordered, if you have previous experience and hold an NVQ Level 3 qualification.

START KIDDING AROUND Get paid to play in the snow five days a week by working in a chalet crèche or as a private nanny, caring for kids aged three months to seven years.

Be prepared to organise activities, cook children’s lunches and report daily to parents. You could baby sit one night per week to supplement your income.

Make sure you are crèche level three qualified or the equivalent (NNEB, diploma in child care and education) and have two years of post-qualification child care experience under your belt.

All workers need to be first aid certified.

FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS Though it’s a cold job, the benefits are nice and cosy. Besides a free ski pass, Ski Amis will literally put a roof over your head

and clothing on your back. On top of accommodation and uniform, food and ski equipment are also provided.

“They get everything they need in the resort,” Van Zadelhoff says.

COOL QUALIFICATIONS The only question left: do you qualify?

Anyone 21 and older and with a UK national insurance number is welcome to apply. Van Zadelhoff says she frequently employs Australians, New Zealanders and South Africans, on one condition: “We’ll take any nationality as long as they are UK residents,” Van Zadelhoff says.

Make sure you’ve had a driving licence, for the past two years. A UK/EU passport, or at least a UK working visa, is also necessary. Skiers should prepare for an avalanche of activities starting in November until the end of April.

There are also some couple-friendly

by Looking good: beauty therapy noon after by es slop the on morning,

companies which can place you and your love for the season.

INSTRUCTOR/ SKI GUIDE If you want to be on the slopes on and off the clock, check out training programs like EA Ski & Snowboard Training, which can provide certification and help you find a job in the same season. Based out of resorts in North America, it’s a great way to work on the slopes.

ON THE JOB JENNY BARTLETT Career Agribusiness Age 23 Lives Perth, Western Australia Ski season Chalet host at Reberty Village Resort in France.

What were your duties?

Greeting the guests, cleaning rooms, and helping prepare meals.

I also helped with après ski events (such as interchalet quizzes and picnics).

What experience was required?

None – just have a

friendly attitude and an understanding of what it is to work in a team.

How often did you get to ski?

Every afternoon, plus my days off.

How many hours per week did you work?

Forty-two hours a week.

What was the best part?

Work didn’t really feel like work.

The people you meet and work with are like-minded and friendly.

What was the worst part?

Making 20 beds every day gets a bit boring but as soon as you’re on the mountain you forget about all that.

Any advice for skiers thinking about a job on the slopes?

Do it! You will never ever forget it.

CAREERS & MONEY

MONEY

WHERE DOES YOUR DOSH GO?

54

Holly Oakenful

Oyster users overcharged ay-as-you-go Oyster card users should be extra vigilant when they add credit to make sure they have not been charged twice.

TfL has refunded £40,000 so far in 2010 due to faulty top up machines over charging, a Freedom of Information request

by BBC London revealed.

P

EASY MONEY Laura Adcock MAKES YOUR CASH GO FURTHER

tntmagazine.com

reported by a disgruntled customer, and urged people to check their bank statements after topping up.

TfL’s Shashi Verna said measures were in place: “We constantly check the screens and how the ticket machines are set up to minimise these problems.”

‘TAP AND GO’ REALITY

FLEXACCOUNT FEE RISE

Speedy payment in shops for transactions of up to £15, where customers ‘touch’ a debit or credit card to a device to pay, will become more widespread. Retailers such as Boots and Tesco have plans to install or test the technology, and various banks are issuing the cards.

Fees for using Nationwide’s FlexAccount card abroad will rise. It is currently free to use the card in the eurozone, with a 1 per cent fee for using it elsewhere. From November, users will incur a 2 per cent fee wherever they are abroad, and will be charged an extra £1 for cash withdrawals.

How do you budget in London?

I have a rough idea of my monthly expenses and I also transfer a specific amount each month into my savings. I am free to spend whatever is left.

Any major expenses that you didn’t anticipate when you first arrived?

TV licence, as it’s an addition to expenses back in Australia, and council tax – the landlord pays this back home, not the tenant.

Last big blowout?

My birthday weekend – it was three days of partying so it cost a lot, but you only have one birthday a year so it was definitely worth it.

All the money I save goes towards my trips because they always cost a lot.

WILL THEY EVER LEARN? After the Gulf of Mexico oil spill, you’d think BP would be keeping a low profile. Not likely. The greedy buggers are already scheming about what’s left over. » The explosion at the which includes $319m paid Deepwater Horizon rig on April 20 killed 11 oil workers. » At 4.9 million barrels – enough oil to fill 311 Olympic-sized swimming pools – it’s the biggest maritime spill on record. » The total cost to BP so far is about US$6.1bn (£3.8bn),

out in compensation. » Yet Doug Suttle, BP’s main man at the scene, said there was still oil to drill for: “Clearly there’s lots of oil and gas there and we’ll have to think about what to do with that at some point.”

Getty Images

If you enjoy eating out on the cheap but are getting tired of vouchers for Pizza Express, Strada, Zizzi et al, consider investing in a ‘tastecard’ (tastelondon.co.uk).

Originally known as ‘tasteLondon’, members get a 50 per cent discount on food at more than 2500 restaurants across London and the UK. Participating venues include popular chains, but also stretch to Marco Pierre White and Pascal Proyart if you’re after something a little more special without breaking the bank.

Annual membership costs £69.95 but keep an eye out for regular promotions offering free trials and a discounted sign-up price.

More than 2400 complaints related to double-charging, the request showed.

Machines at London Bridge, Victoria, Liverpool Street and King’s Cross stations were the major culprits.

TfL admitted it had no way of knowing about errors unless they were

Job Teacher From Townsville, Australia Lives Hammersmith Age 23

tntjobs.co.uk BEST OF THE WEB LIVING VENTURES MANAGEMENT

JOB OF THE WEEK: Executive Head Chef Required Location: Manchester Salary: £45k - £50k

Living Ventures Management is proud and excited to present the latest impressive addition to the Manchester Restaurant and Bar scene. Australasia.

We are looking for an exceptional Executive Head Chef for the development of our new flagship casual Fine Dinning restaurant and Brassiere situated in the heart of Manchester. You will be passionate about flavours and innovation with a flair for the Pan Asian, Pacific rim with an Australian/European influence. Real prospect of development opportunities in the future, plus on target bonus’s up to 50% of salary.

John Branagan – Chef Director | johnbranagan@livingventures.com

MYLOCUM T: 020 8553 7974 www.mylocum.co.uk

JOB OF THE WEEK: Middle Grade A&E Doctors Location: South West England Salary: On Application

MR TOPPERS T: 020 7734 3831 / 020 7434 4088

JOB OF THE WEEK: Top Hairdressers Wanted Location: Central London Salary: £300-£500 pounds a week

Exciting and immediate opportunity for qualified experienced British, Australian, New Zealand, South African, USA and suitably trained Middle Grade A&E Doctors from the EU to take up permanent positions for at least two years or longer within a well established and large Medical Institution. Very good basic negotiable, plus the opportunity to earn a great deal more! If you are either based in the UK or wishing to work in a beautiful part of England then please submit your CV with a covering note to: Mike Boell | 020 8514 9425 | mikeboell@mylocum.com

Top hairdresser wanted to work in busy salon in heart of London, must be friendly and fun. Has to have 4 or more years experience in the industry and able to work full time and able to speak good english.

Becky 07702 153 524 or 020 7434 4088 | Giovanna 07578 785 288

PROACTIVE TECHNICAL RECRUITMENT LIMITED T: 01784-487600 www.proactive-tech.co.uk Proactive Technical Recruitment specialise in recruitment solutions throughout the Engineering sector. We offer a complete service to employers and candidates.

ORIGIN LTD T: 01524 34100 www.origincare.com Origin provides live-in carers in the homes of young adults with a spinal injury. The work is varied and rewarding. We provide free training, good rates of pay and paid holidays.

PRIVATE SCOTTISH SPORTING ESTATE T: 07737 517699 Privately owned Scottish sporting estate, focusing on grouse shooting, in Kingussie, the heart of the highlands, just south of Aviemore.

JOB OF THE WEEK: Truck & Bus Technicians Location: London Salary: Best Rates We urgently require HGV & PSV Technicians all over London. You will be responsible for the Service, Repair and Maintenance of some of the countries leading Operators vehicles. You will have strong previous experience working on Heavy Goods Vehicles, you will also be qualified in Heavy Vehicle Maintenance or a relevant subject.

Andy Jennings | 01784-487600 | andy@proactive-tech.co.uk

JOB OF THE WEEK: Live-in Carers/Personal Assistants Location: Nationwide Salary: Start on £504 per week We require 5 live-in carers/Personal Assistants to fill current positions.

You will have an out going, friendly personality and be able to work under the direction of the client. Typically people who do this job are educated, independent and happy to work in one-to-one situations.

No experience necessary - can do attitude essential.

John | 020 7617 7894 | www.origincare.com/careapp

JOB OF THE WEEK: Grouse Beaters Location: Kingussie, Highlands, Inverness-shire Salary: Day rate Enthusiastic outdoor people required to work for 5 weeks from 26th August as grouse beaters in the Scottish Highlands. Board and lodgings included.

Work for 5 days per week on day rate. If not grouse beating then assisting with Estate maintenance.

Graham Mabon | 07737 517699| graham@mabon8678.fsnet.co.uk

LOOKING FOR YOUR NEXT JOB? NEW JOBS ONLINE EVERY DAY To advertise your job of the week contact the TNT sales team| 020 7341 6767 | sales@tntmagazine.com

ARE YOU JOB HUNTING? Visit tntjobs.co.uk for more than 7,000 vacant positions in all industries across the UK, Australia and New Zealand.

At tntjobs.co.uk youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll find out how to land your perfect job, an A-Z list of employers, job alerts, career news and information, visa advice and details of recruiters.

jobs.co.uk Solving your recruitment problems!

COMING & GOING ACCOMMODATION There are Antipodeans and South Africans calling all parts of London home, but generally they tend to head west (Acton, Shepherd’s Bush, Fulham, Hammersmith), north (Dollis Hill, Kilburn, Willesden Green) or south (Clapham, Southfields, Tooting).

For listings see tntmagazine. com/accommodation.

Dossing Offer to chip in £5 a night minimum.

Hostels Expect to pay at least £10-£25 a night.

Sharing You can share a room for about £50 a week, while a room to yourself will start at around £80 a week.

Going it alone A bedsit or studio is at least £150 a week.

Bills Bills can include phone, gas, electricity, water, council tax and a TV licence.

Bond This is usually a month’s rent. You may also have to pay one month’s rent in advance.

Leases You may need to sign a lease, which will typically run for six or 12 months.

ASK THE EXPERTS Robyn Cory EXPERT, 1ST CONTACT

Q

My son, who is 21, is considering moving to the UK from South Africa.

I have a British passport (my father was British) and have lived here in the UK for three years (permanently employed).

I know my son qualifies for an ancestral visa, but could he get a British passport because I have one? Also, if he comes over on an ancestral visa, does he need a minimum level of savings and a certificate of sponsorship? He will be staying with me until he gets on his feet.

because he fails to meet the conditions for double-descent citizenship. These include that the parent who is British by descent lived in the UK before the child’s birth for a continuous period of three years and that the child’s application be made before the child’s 18th birthday. As your son is already 21, he will be eligible to apply for an ancestry visa on the basis of a grandparent born in the UK. He will need to have the equivalent of £1600 in savings. A sponsorship certificate is not needed.

A

question about getting started or moving on email realitycheck@tntmagazine.com

Unfortunately, your South African-born son does not qualify for British citizenship

» For more, see 1stcontact.com. To ask a

you want, though it’s usual to give a month’s notice and help find someone to move in.

Pay and cancel your bills

Namely council tax, internet, phone, gas, electricity, TV, gym membership, insurance.

Settle overdrafts and credit cards Any defaults on bank

payments will be filed with a credit reference agency (making it difficult for you to set up an account or rent a flat if you return), or you could receive a County Court Judgement.

EMPLOYMENT Getting a job doesn’t have to be an impossible task. Register with a couple of agencies, the cream of which advertise in TNT and at tntjobs.co.uk.

Most recruitment agencies handle specific sectors: IT, banking, finance, secretarial, legal, medical and teaching are the broad categories.

Make an appointment to see a consultant, and take your passport, CV and references with you. Some agencies will help you open a bank account.

TNT Images

NATIONAL INSURANCE You need a National Insurance (NI) number to work in the UK. Call 0845 600 0643 to make an appointment to apply for one.

Some NI contributions go into a State Second Pension (S2P). You can contract out of this and direct the money into a private pension fund instead.

You’ll need to do this before the end of the tax year or your contributions will be lost.

TAX

TNT’S TOP TIP

To save the hassle of a ‘chores’ roster in a sharehouse, it’s worth investing in a weekly cleaning service.

» Email your tips to reality check@tntmagazine.com

TNT online Check out tntmagazine.com/ movingtolondon if you’re on your way, tntmagazine.com/ leavingtheuk if you’re going.

MOVING ON CHECKLIST Resign from work How

much notice you need to give your employer will depend on your contract (usually two weeks to three months). You must give at least one week’s notice if you’ve been in your job for a month or more.

Give notice on your flat

Check the conditions of your Tenancy Agreement. If you want to leave before your lease is up you may be liable to pay until new tenants are found. If you’re living in a sharehouse and haven’t signed a contract, you can move out whenever

The UK tax year begins on April 6, and if you work only part of the tax year you should get some tax back.

The tax threshold is £6475 per year – so if you earn less than this, you won’t pay any tax. You’ll need a P45 (when you leave a job) and a P60 (at the end of the tax year).

If you’re leaving the UK and won’t work again before the end of the tax year, you can claim a rebate by filling in a P85.

SHIPPING Get plenty of quotes, checking sizes and whether customs and tax charges are covered.

For sea freight (which should take no longer than 12 weeks to arrive) you’ll pay about £80£150 for your first box – less for suitcases – and £30-£90 for additional boxes.

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CAREERS & MONEY

JUST ARRIVED

57

! sed W a O rele N tes

with

K a O ber d BO m

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e

pt e S

Learn The Lingo courses, part of TNT’s Language School, are ideal for beginners or those who’d like to brush up on the basics

Classes commence Sep 22/23 VENUE TNT offices, SW5 9RX once a week for five weeks:

WEDNESDAYS Ë FRENCH Ë SPANISH

TIME Wed, Thu, 6.30pm-8pm COST £65 before September 13 £75 from September 14 Courses include: u

THURSDAYS Ë SPANISH Ë ITALIAN

u u u u

Five weeks of intensive sessions Language Machine tutor Language pack and reading materials Jumbuck’s pie Refreshments

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FOR INFO AND TO BOOK YOUR PLACE SEE tntmagazine.com/school Places are limited, only 15 per course, book early to avoid disappointment!

TRAVEL GLOBAL VISION A man relaxes on a pier at West Lake, in the popular tourist destination of Hangzhou in China.

Famous for its beautiful

TRAVEL

natural scenery, the city is one of the countryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s most prosperous and is a popular tourist destination for Chinese and foreigners alike.

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Photo by Philippe Lopez/ AFP/Getty Images

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INTO the WOODS

From cycling to canoeing, discover ways to delve into the heart of the New Forest WORDS JANINE KELSO

The New Forest ENGLAND

T

he scene is straight out of a fairytale: a deserted, wild wood of mighty oaks and pines, shrouded in a haze. The trees loom above me, a riot of verdant greens and chocolate browns, and I feel a sense of pure escapism as I ride my bicycle along the gravelled paths. My mobile phone has no signal and I haven’t seen another soul for miles.

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OAR-INSPIRING Wanting to give my bum a rest from the saddle, I opt for a canoeing session through the Beaulieu (pronounced ‘Bewley’) River Nature Reserve. Two to three people pile into each canoe, and our guides, Sam and Jake, give us tips on how to improve our technique. I begin by

TNT Images

Good drinking: country pubs are ace

ROYAL RETREAT Once a royal playground for deer hunting, the New Forest used to be heavily guarded for the sole use of William the Conqueror and his cronies. Fast forward 900 years and the National Park is open to all, but the landscape has resisted the onslaught of the 21st century, remaining largely unchanged. Wild ponies graze freely in the open meadows and beside the road, as they have done for hundreds

of years. Ponies and donkeys are a permanent fixture in the vibrant village of Brockenhurst, and are frequently spotted enjoying a drink at the famous Watersplash, a stream that runs across a main road.

The Forest is best explored by bicycle: there’s a surfeit of car-free cycle tracks that pass alongside seas of dry heaths, wet bogs and ancient woodland, as well as stacks of charming pubs in which to refuel, and countless picturesque picnic spots.

TRAVEL

PARADISE FOR PETROLHEADS NATIONAL MOTOR MUSEUM From F1 cars to rare motoring oddities such as a giant orange on wheels, Beaulieu’s National Motor Museum has more than 250 vehicles on display.

Star rides include TV favourites such as Del Boy’s Reliant Regal from Only Fools and Horses. In the dedicated Motor Sport Gallery, you’ll find four of the most famous World Land Speed Record Breakers, including Donald Campbell’s ‘Bluebird’.

The museum’s newest exhibition is the World of Top Gear, which features actual vehicles created by presenters Jeremy Clarkson, Richard Hammond and James May in some of their ambitious challenges on the TV show.

See beaulieu.co.uk.

Sam Tinson / Rex Features

weedily wielding my paddle like I’m stirring a cup of tea, but I soon learn how to master my movements. The water is awash with milky white moon jellyfish, which Sam tells us are safe to touch, prompting us all to start prodding the slimy creatures.

MAKING WAVES The royals might have moved out, but the super-rich still rule the roost in Beaulieu, reflected by the string of millionaire’s mansions that line the river estuary’s banks, including one owned by the minted former owner of adventure retailer Snow and Rock. The attractive village of Beaulieu is actually owned by eccentric Tory peer Lord Montagu and has been in his family since the 1530s.

The swanky homes soon give way to tranquil salt marshes, studded with

Peace and tranquillity

61

Up close: Wild ponies roam freely

clusters of lush-green samphire plants and skeletal-like gnarly trees, whose roots have been poisoned by the salty water. Once back on dry land, I stop for a picnic in a sun-splashed meadow near Baileys Hard, before getting back on my bike to continue exploring England’s unspoilt wilderness.

» Janine Kelso hired a bike with CycleXperience (01590 624204; cyclex.co.uk), which offers one-day bicycle hire for £14, and can arrange delivery or pick-up from a variety of drop-off points throughout the Forest. Janine had a canoe lesson with Liquid Logistics (01590 612377; newforestactivities.co.uk). A two-hour canoeing session is £28. She travelled to Brockenhurst from London with South West Trains (southwesttrains.co.uk).

Majestic : deer are still plentiful

NEED TO KNOW WHEN TO GO Bikes can be hired all that makes a circular route around year-round, but canoeing sessions only Lyndhurst, Lymington, Brockenhurst, run from March until October.

Exbury and Beaulieu.

GETTING THERE South West GOING OUT A beer is about £3.

Trains (southwesttrains.co.uk) ACCOMMODATION A night run direct trains from in a tent costs from £10 and London to Brockenhurst. a hotel room costs £50.

ENGLAND GETTING AROUND By SEE The New Forest bicycle, or jump Tourism Association LONDON aboard the New (thenewforest.co.uk) for Forest Tour bus accommodation, local Brockenhurst Beaulieu (thenewforest.co.uk), a attractions, activities and New Forest hop-on hop-off service events in the New Forest.

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LATE DEALS

TRAVEL

UNDER £250

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Two nights in Normandy costs £199 with Tracks Travel (0845 1300936; tracks-travel.com), including return coach, ferries and B&B accommodation. Visit the D-Day landing beaches, Mont St Michel and the Bayeaux Tapestry. Departs August 27.

Three nights in Spanish party town Barcelona is £200 with Lowcostholidays.com (0800 1116271), including B&B accommodation and flights.

Departs September 11.

A four-day Oktoberfest midweek tour is £153 with Travel Talk (020 8099 8852; traveltalktours.com), including accommodation, breakfasts, experienced tour guide, t-shirt and welcome pack. Departs September 24. Excludes flights.

Book by August 31.

Three nights in romantic Rome costs £169 with Flight Centre (0844 800 8628; flightcentre.co.uk). Quote ROMLONPAC1. Offer ends September 30. Valid for travel between November 2 and December 25.

Soak up the sights in Paris over the August bank holiday weekend for £245 with Anderson Tours (020 7436 9304; andersontours.co.uk), including return Eurostar, transfers, two nights’ B&B accommodation and a guided city sightseeing tour. Departs August 28.

DEAL OF THE WEEK

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DAILY TRAVEL DEALS GO TO tntmagazine.com/travel/latedeals where new travel deals are updated daily.

There are more than 30 deals live at any time. Also sign up for TNT’s weekly travel newsletter, which will be emailed to you every Wednesday with the most up-to-date deals and guides to over 170 destinations.

Sign up at tntmagazine.com/travelemail.

£250 - £500

OVER £500

Visit Leipzig in Germany for £289 with Dertour (020 7290 1111; dertour.co.uk), including B&B accommodation, flights and rail transfers. Valid until August 30.

An eight-day Sail Croatia tour is £299 (saving £200) with Travel Talk (020 8099 8852; traveltalktours.com), including on-board accommodation, all lunches and more. Departs August 28. Excludes flights.

Tour Egypt for 13 days for £323 with Topdeck Travel (0845 257 5212; topdeck.travel).

Excludes flights and US$240 local payment. Departs Cairo September 5.

A Thailand beach break is £499 with Flight Centre (0844 800 8628; flightcentre.co.uk), including flights and accommodation. Quote BKKLONPAC21. Offer ends August 31. Valid for travel from October 4-31.

A 53-day tour of South America is £1070 with Oasis Overland (01963 363400; oasisoverland.co.uk), including the Inca Trail to Machu Picchu and a stay with a family in Lake Titicaca. Excludes flights, visas and US$1040 local payment.

Departs Quito on September 17.

Two weeks in Sri Lanka with Hayes & Jarvis (0871 664 0246; hayesandjarvis.co.uk) is £599, including flights and B&B accommodation. Departs October 9. Book by August 27.

A 13-day tour of Turkey is £555.30 with Tucan Travel (020 8896 1600; tucantravel.com).

Departs from Istanbul on September 11. Book before August 31. Excludes flights.

A 21-day tour of Europe, including Oktoberfest, is £931 with Contiki (0845 075 0990; contiki.com/lates). Departs September 11.

*All fares are ex-London, unless otherwise stated.

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An eight-day Sailing Split tour along the coast of Croatia with On the Go (020 7371 1113; onthegotours.com), is £310 including on-board accommodation and meals. Departs August 28.

Machu Picchu, Peru

TRAVEL 63

TNT Weekender Cologne GERMANY

Set on the river Rhine, Cologne is packed with beer halls, bars and clubs, making it an attractive destination for party-goers. But there is plenty to tickle your cultural side too. The city has an abundance of churches and museums and offers up a mix of Roman, medieval and modern architecture.

HEADLINE ATTRACTION The giant gothic structure of Cologne Cathedral dominates the city’s skyline with its twin towers that loom over the city.

Inside you’ll find the Shrine of the Three Magi, a tomb that is said to hold one of the Three Kings. Take a walk around the great building before checking it out inside. Make sure you climb up the bell tower and take in the panoramic views across the city.

pretty sweet as far as museums go, although it’s no Willy Wonka factory. Learn about growing cocoa, watch the chocolate production line in action and eat fresh chocolate from the fountain.

CHOW DOWN German food is super hearty and after eating it for a few days you’ll certainly feel heavier. Think bratwurst, stuffed pork belly, potatoes, bread and sauerkraut. If you tire from the traditional fare, Cologne is very multi-cultural

TNT Images

RETAIL THERAPY Cologne is fairly compact and has a great selection of shops, from boutiques to high street stores. If you’re looking for unusual presents, time your visit with the festival season when the city hosts seven fantastic Christmas markets, from November 22 until December 23. The market at Cologne Cathedral is the most impressive while Neumarkt is home to Cologne’s oldest Christmas market.

FESTIVAL TIME

and you’ll find cuisine from all over the world.

BEST OF THE REST Cologne boasts a huge number of museums, from sport to art and even an old Gestapo prison. If you have a sweet tooth, head to the Schokoladen Museum. Dedicated entirely to choccies, Schokoladen is

great way of meeting the locals as the shared tables make it quite a social event.

TRY THE LOCAL TIPPLE Cologne is home to 20 breweries so there’s plenty of local types to get into, such as Kölsch. Sup on a few steins of bier at one of Cologne’s many beer halls, which are also a

Join fancy dress-clad revellers at Cologne Carnival, one of Europe’s biggest street parties, which marks Germany’s ‘fifth season’, Karneval, on November 11 at 11.11am. Expect dancing in the streets and partying in the bars and pubs.

NEXT WEEK LEEDS

TNT online

NEED TO KNOW WHEN TO GO Time your visit with Cologne Carnival (November 11) or go during the Christmas markets.

GETTING THERE Fly direct to Cologne from London with EasyJet, KLM, Lufthansa and German wings.

VISAS South Africans need a Schengen visa.

CURRENCY Euro. 1 GBP = 1.21 EUR. LANGUAGE German.

GETTING AROUND Explore the sights on foot.

GOING OUT A small glass of Kolsch costs about ¤2.

ACCOMMODATION Dorm beds from ¤17, double rooms from ¤25.

SEE: cologne-tourism.com

BERLIN

GERMANY Cologne

For a full travel guide on visiting Germany go to tntmagazine.com/travel

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NE ZO OP DR For the ultimate adrenalin rush, scale new heights and learn to skydive WORDS PAWEL KOLAT

Skydiving LILLO, SPAIN

W

ith my legs dangling from the tiny plane as it hovers at 13000ft, I feel as if my nervous system has been plugged into a 1000-volt power line.

My instructor Ernesto Gainza senses my anxiety and offers reassurance.

“Just arch your back as if you want to punch the air with your dick first, and you’ll be fine,” he says. I’m so scared that it’s not until later that I can actually laugh at his advice.

CLOUD COVER Flanked by two instructors, I take a deep breath of petrol fumes and icy air, and chuck myself into the void.

The freefall is surreal: it feels like I’m floating on a cushion of air rather than

tntmagazine.com

NEED TO KNOW

Venezuela – the world’s tallest waterfall.

It wasn’t long before I was putting theory into practice, and after a few jumps I start to relax and love the heart-stomping thrill.

Between skydives, I spend an afternoon wandering around the nearby time-warp town of Toledo, its streets lined with medieval buildings, the perfect antidote to the craziness and intensity of skydiving.

Getty Images, Markson Sparks / Rex Features, TNT Images

Coming in to land

plummeting at 120mph, but the deafening wind reminds me of my rapid descent.

At 5500ft, I pull the parachute chord and suddenly, everything goes silent. Phew, I’ve survived. I’m alive.

As I float downwards, I soak up the stunning views of the olive groves below me, but I can’t relax for long. Luckily, I land smoothly in a blanket of poppies, a rural idyll that looks like something from a Monet painting.

LIVIN’ THE DREAM I blame the thrill-seeking, skydiving criminals in Point Break for prompting me to enrol on a four-day course at Skydive Lillo, just outside Madrid.

Before doing my first jump, I spent a day in the classroom going over the landing pattern and the safety drills.

Instructor Ernesto has impressive

RIDE LIKE THE WIND On my seventh jump, I somersault out of the plane and position myself into an arrow shape, with my hands pointing backwards and my body stretched out like Superman. This technique, known as ‘tracking’, generates a lot of forward speed, and I fall 1000ft every five seconds, feeling every inch the superhero.

Adrenalin courses through my veins and the high is like nothing I’ve experienced before.

When I return to base an alarm sounds and an announcement is made: “Congratulations Pawel – you’re a skydiver now!” After seven jumps, I’ve completed my Accelerated Freefall course (AFF).

Everyone starts clapping and I grab a beer, I feel on top of the world.

» Pawel trained with Skydive Lillo (+34 925 170 704; skydivelillo.com), which offers tandem skydiving from €179 and skydiving courses from €1513. Beginners are welcome.

TRAVEL

WHEN TO GO You MADRID can skydive all year round, but Toledo Lillo spring to autumn SPAIN has the sunniest and driest weather.

GETTING THERE Ryanair, EasyJet, BA, Iberia and Air Europa all fly to Madrid from London.

GETTING AROUND Take a train from Madrid to Villacañas (50 minutes), then take a taxi to Lillo (10 minutes).

VISAS South Africans need a Schengen visa to visit Spain.

CURRENCY Euro. 1 GBP = 1.20 EUR. LANGUAGE Spanish.

GOING OUT A beer is €1.50-€2.

ACCOMMODATION Camping is ¤3 Cityscape: Toledo a night, a hostel dorm is ¤15 and credentials: he’s competed at international a hotel room is ¤30. level and has base jumped Angel Falls in SEE spain.info.

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INDOOR SKYDIVING If you’re too much of a wimp to try skydiving for real, but would love to see what it feels like to fly through the air, visit indoor skydiving centre Airkix, in Milton Keynes, an hour from London.

The notion of flying indoors was first tried by the American military in 1964, and the first vertical wind tunnels were opened in Tennessee and Las Vegas in 1982. At Airkix, skydivers have a basic training session, before geting kitted out in helmets, jumpsuits and earplugs.

To enter the wind tunnel, stand in the open doorway, lean forward and you’ll feel your legs lift from under you.

Then arch your back and get into a horizontal flying position: a complete buzz. The instructor will enter the tunnel with you to help you assume a neutral flying position. After your session, the instructor will show the group a few dazzling tricks and impressive air acrobatics. Be prepared to get addicted! See airkix.com.

HOTSHOTS Hayley Madden TALKS TRAVEL PHOTOGRAPHY

WINNER MONT GARGAS LA SALETTE, FRANCE Marek Madera

The late afternoon sun has produced dramatic shadows and warm tones to really bring out the treacherous ridges and contrasting climates in this mountain range.

The tiny figures show the scale of the landscape and are framed by a triangle of

thick cloud, which points us up the slope to the tiny but significant cross at the top.

HOT TIP: Mountains and hills are excellent for strong diagonals and triangles to draw you into a scene and force you to look away into the distance.

RUNNER-UP VOTE FOR ME, LONDON WATERLOO Anna Howie, Christchurch, New Zealand A huge piece of graffiti provides an interesting and colourful element to this grimly lit street scene. A slow shutter speed blurs the dark passer-by.

The fact that he is on the rule of thirds, walking towards the head of the painted girl, adds movement to the composition. Despite all of the

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» Marek wins a three-day tour of Scotland for two valued at £198 from Haggis Adventures (haggisadventures.com; 0131 557 9393)

writing, only the ‘Vote for Me’ grafitti is clear and is right in the middle, providing a clear message for the image.

HOT TIP: Ironically, 2D images are excellent for adding an extra dimension to your compositions. » Anna wins a photography course from Nigel Wilson Photography (020 7793 8664; photographycourses.org.uk) valued at £60

HOTSHOTS

HOLIDAY SNAPS

HOW TO MAKE YOUR PHOTOS STAND OUT

THEME: TONING Champagne, France by Simone Clarke, Melbourne, Australia

TRAVEL

Toning adds atmosphere to an image, making a statement about the subject. Simone has given a warm sepia treatment to this idyllic village scene, for a nostalgic ambience.

WHY THIS WORKS:

67

1 Old-fashioned scenes suit sepia treatments.

2 Warm tones add a warm glow to the image, enhancing the nostalgic mood.

3 The strong composition has effective leading lines and tonal range.

4 Soft clouds add texture to the sky.

5 The wrought iron sign is a good focal point.

HOT TIPS: 1 Ensure you have a strong composition: toning should enhance, not save your image.

2 Good tonal range is needed.

A high-contrast image will not colour well and a soft image will look wishy washy.

3 Black and white images generally work best.

4 Sepia toning is most popular but try other colours â&#x20AC;&#x201C; blue and purple can look great.

5 Tone the traditional way by bathing the print or use a computer. The latter is easier to control and you can try a variety of effects.

TNT online For details of how to enter go to tntmagazine.com/gallery

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TIPS Paris, France

READERS’ TIPS HOMELESS HAUNTS

TRAVEL

Challenge your TIP OF view of THE WEEK homelessness by going on an Unseen Tour of London, with one of four homeless guides. The walks run until August 29. See sockmobevents.org.uk.

Joanna, via email

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WILD FOR WHISKY

YOU ASKED FOR IT Tom Hall FROM LONELY PLANET

If you are on the Isle of Skye, don’t miss the Talisker Distillery tour.

It’s only £5, and the most comprehensive distillery tour that I’ve ever been on.

You’ll get a free dram – their whisky is deliciously smokey and quite sweet, and a guide will also talk you through the whole whisky-making process.

The friendly tour leaders are delighted to share their wealth of knowledge.

Sarah, via email

I have been in the UK for more than five years and haven’t yet travelled. Can you suggest any good destinations?

Lynzie, via email

In your opinion, which country has the best food?

David, via email

Q

Q

A

A

Blimey, Lynzie, where to begin? I’m tempted to come round to your house and hug you, and say how happy I am for you.

You are a blank canvas and that’s a marvellous thing to be. I’m sure everyone reading this has a different suggestion, but I’d start with Paris.

The French capital may be less than three hours away by train but it remains a world apart. Parisiens are a fabulous bunch; opinionated, proud and more friendly than you may have been led to believe. You can see world-famous sights by day and by night rub shoulders with the fashionable locals in the bars and cafés of the Marais or the Latin Quarter.

Going here not only gets you started with travelling in the Schengen area, but it will introduce you to the delights of life on the road, meeting people and making your own decisions about what you do and where you go.

And once you’re off there will be no stopping you. Paris will lead to Amsterdam, Berlin, Barcelona and Prague. Don’t even think about going home until you’ve taken a train through the Alps, had a night out in Rome, drank pints with the locals in Ireland and seen the midnight sun in Norway. As I said, I didn’t know where to begin, but you won’t know when to finish.

tntmagazine.com

An excellent question if I may say so, David. And one without one answer.

How to decide? If it’s the one moment of eating something fast when very hungry, it would be Italy. There are so many café outlets that sell pizza and charge you by the size of the piece – I can still taste it and it is utterly wonderful, plus there is a world of unusual flavours to try.

For the simple joy of wonderful local ingredients, France is unbeatable. For a few Euros you can sample some of the world’s best cheese, bread and condiments. Try the fig preserve in the Languedoc area. For fun, Spanish tapas can’t be beaten. Hit a bar, have a drink, have a nibble, move on, repeat until dawn.

Lastly, for something exotic I would nominate the creole fusion food of Madagascar. The island is impossibly exotic, and the French colonial influence ensures that the Malagasy know how to cook. Even in the smallest villages, French baguettes are baked fresh every day. And one of the country’s signature dishes, chicken in a mildly spiced coconut sauce is enough to make the weariest of traveller’s palettes sing to the heavens. Three of these four options are very, very close to here. Lucky for all of you!

Email your words of wisdom to traveltips@tntmagazine.com. Tip of the Week wins a Lonely Planet guide and other published tips win a fiver.

WIN

Lonely Planet’s Tom Hall will give you the benefit of his infinite wisdom if you email a question to traveltips@tntmagazine.com.

If he answers your question, you’ll win a Lonely Planet guide of your choice. TNT readers can get 20 per cent off all Lonely Planet guides valued at more than £12.99. Enter promotional code PTNT01 at shop.lonelyplanet.com.

This is a reader forum — TNT and Lonely Planet accept no responsibility for any loss, injury or inconvenience sustained by anyone using the information provided.

TRAVEL NEWS

Don’t be a total ass

NEW INDIA TOUR On the Go Tours has introduced a new tour in southern India, called Captivating Kerela. The nine-day trip costs from £699, and includes a visit to Periyar National Park, home to bison, antelope and Bengal tigers, and a night aboard a houseboat. See onthegotours.com.

TOPLESS ARE FINED Tourists who bare their chests in French cities face being fined under new public decency laws. Perpignan, near the Spanish border, has introduced the strict rules to ban people from going topless. Similar regulations were launched in Cavaillon in Provence earlier this year.

If you dare to bare, expect to be fined £31.

TRAVEL GUIDES Time Out is set to publish a new guide to Lisbon (£12.99) on September 2, which will include hidden gems, from local fashion designers to cool bars. Meanwhile, Rough Guides is poised to release a brand new guide to New Orleans & Cajun Country (£13.99), and a revised edition of its guide to New Zealand (£16.99), out September 1.

TRAVEL

Tubby travellers are being urged to help alleviate the suffering of horses, donkeys and mules across the world.

Charity The Brooke suggests that before going on a donkey ride, tourists should ask themselves if the animal can carry their weight and if it’s healthy and happy? See thebrooke.org.

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PLAYING PERFECT HOSTS Do not be alarmed if South Africans announce they were held up by robots and do not take offence if an Aussie or Kiwi makes a joke about “Poms”.

These are just a few of the bizarre tips included in a list drawn up by VisitBritain to help Londoners avoid offending tourists during the 2012 Olympic Games. The guide, Delivering a First Class Welcome, was penned by natives from the countries included, and features a fascinating list of hints on tourist etiquette.

The tips include advice on deciphering South African lingo. “Robots” are traffic lights, “takkies” are trainers, a barbecue is a “braai” and “howzit” is an informal way of saying “hello”. Londoners are also warned not to place

your thumb between your forefinger and your second finger when in a social situation with a South African – it is an obscene gesture.

If a Chinese person gives you a compliment, don’t say “thank you”. It’s better to show humility by politely denying it. Never pour wine backwards into a glass for an Argentinian person as it shows hostility, and try not to be offended by their sense of humour, which may include a derogatory comment about your weight or clothing. And if you come into contact with a Brazilian, don’t ask them any personal questions about age, pay packet or marriage.

Finally, don’t assume that a smiling Japanese person is happy. Japanese folk also smile when sad or angry.

Kiss your holiday goodbye Kiss Flights has collapsed, leaving 70,000 holidaymakers with their plans in tatters.

The budget airline, which flies to Greece, Egypt, Turkey and the Canary Islands, went into administration last week.

The Civil Aviation Authority (CAA) said that up to 60,000 customers have booked holidays with Kiss Flights, and 13,000 tourist are already abroad.

Luckily, for the thousands of holidaymakers affected by the collapse of the travel firm, Kiss Flights’ operations were financially protected by the

Kiss Flights goes bust

TNTMAGAZINE.COM MOST POPULAR DESTINATIONS 1 Spain 2 England 3 France 4 Germany 5 Italy

HOTTEST KEYWORDS ON TNTMAGAZINE.COM/TOURSEARCH

CAA-run ATOL (Air Travel Operators Licensing) scheme.

This means that Kiss Flights customers who are already on holiday can complete their trips, and anyone with a booking can apply to the CAA for compensation. The collapse of Kiss Flights follows the recent failure of Goldtrail Holidays and Sun4U.

1 Egypt 2 Morocco 3 Europe 4 Turkey 5 Italy powered by

FREE ONLINE GUIDES Go to tntmagazine.com/ travel for travel guides on more than 170 destinations.

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ON THE ROAD

WORDS FRANKIE MULLIN

ON THE ROAD

EGREMONT CRAB FAIR

TRAVEL

Cumbria, England Sep 18 Bizarre Ye Olde Worlde activities like apple-throwing and, erm, climbing a greasy pole. But best of all is the World Gurning Championship.

Don’t enter if you’re trying to pull.

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» egremontcrabfair.com

HERMANUS WHALE FESTIVAL WESTERN CAPE, SOUTH AFRICA WHAT: Watch the migration

» whalefestival.co.za

TNT online For more upcoming events, see our destination guides at tntmagazine.com/travel

LOCK IT IN HALLOWEEN PARADE New York City, USA Oct 31, 2010 halloween-nyc.com

TAR BARREL ROLLING Ottery St Mary, England Nov 5, 2010 otterytourism.org.uk

HOGMANAY ALL-IRELAND HURLING FINAL Croke Park, Dublin Sep 5 It’s the biggest sporting event in Ireland. Not only is hurling the most insane game to watch (it’s the fastest field team sport); but the Irish know how to celebrate like legends.

» gaa.ie

Where in the world?

Edinburgh, Scotland Dec 31, 2010 edinburghshogmanay.org

VENICE CARNIVAL Venice, Italy Feb 25-Mar 8, 2011 veniceconnected.com

RIO CARNIVAL Rio de Janeiro, Brazil Mar 4-8, 2011 rio-carnival.net

THE TRAVELLER …

Anna McNeil, 23, Tasmania Your favourite place?

Norway – hiking on the glaciers is beautiful.

Weirdest thing you’ve eaten?

I ate some strange meat in Belgium.

I don’t even know what it was.

Your favourite place in London?

Ollie Thomas from Melbourne, Australia at M'Hamid (beginning of the Sahara), Morocco

WIN

Been somewhere good lately? Send us a horizontal photo of yourself with a copy of TNT from anywhere around the world and, if we print it, you’ll win a day trip for two to Bath and Stonehenge with Anderson Tours, valued at £90. » Email your pictures to ontheroad@tntmagazine.com along with your name, where you’re from and where the photo was taken, or see tntmagazine.com/world. Files must be at least 500Kb.

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Zoo Bar, Leicester Square.

Which country has the hottest guys?

Australia.

Getty Images, TNT Images

of the southern right whale from a vantage place on the cliffs. A whale crier will sound a kelp horn to let you know when the majestic creatures are near. There’s also music, crafts and food.

WHERE: Hermanus, near Africa’s southernmost tip. Tie it in with a trip to Cape Town.

WHEN: Sep 24-28.

WHY: Whales, once hunted in Hermanus, are now protected.

DO IT BECAUSE: This is one of the best whale watching spots in the world and witnessing the migration is a wrenching reminder that this species is nearly extinct.

HOW MUCH: Free.

WITH FRANKIE MULLIN

TOP FIVE

FIVE WILDLIFE HOTSPOTS JANINE KELSO GIVES A HIGH FIVE THE PANTANAL WHAT: A tropical wetland area that sprawls across Brazil, Bolivia and Paraguay. The huge range of aquatic plants can support many species, including marsh deer and the giant river otter, which are particularly rare. The hyacinth macaw and giant anteater can also be found at the Unesco World Heritage Site.

SEE: pantanal.org

1

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COCKSCOMB BASIN WHAT: Recognized as the world’s first jaguar preserve, this sanctuary in Belize, Central America also boasts wildcats, tapir, exotic flowers, reptiles, and tropical birds.

Prince Philip, as International President of the World Wildlife Fund, has visited in the past.

SEE: belizeaudubon.org

KAZIRANGA PARK WHAT: An important wildlife conservation base in eastern India, this marshland and forest area is home to buffalo, one-horned rhino, elephants and deer, as well as being an ‘Important Bird Area’, according to BirdLife International.

SEE: worldheritagekaziranga.com

2

5

MASAI MARA WHAT: Probably the most famous safari area in the world, the Kenyan plains offer sightings of the ‘Big Five’: lion, African elephant, buffalo, leopard and rhinoceros. It is also the site of the Great Migration of zebra and wildebeest from the Serengeti.

SEE: masaimara.org

3

MASOALA NATIONAL PARK WHAT: Madagascar’s largest protected area houses 10 lemur species, gecko, rare birds such as the red owl and amusingly-named creatures like the tomato frog.

Humpback whales migrate here for calving, too.

SEE: mwc-info.net

Frank Krahmer, TNT Images

4

THE INSIDER ELLA FRATER, MARKETING CO-ORDINATOR, TOURISM NEW SOUTH WALES The best part of my job is … travelling to Sydney and New South Wales to check out all of the new attractions.

My most challenging travel experience was … when my friends and I accidentally took the 'scenic route' while driving around the

pot-holed roads in Cuba, where you're lucky to find someone that speaks a word of English.

My most memorable travel experience was … navigating my way around Guatemala on the local chicken buses.

The next trip on my travel wishlist is … Sydney for New Year's Eve. I always pack … my eye mask.

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SPIRIT OF

MEXICO Down a tequila and join the revellers at Mexico’s macabre yet fascinating Day of the Dead celebrations WORDS ZOE HARRIS

Oaxaca MEXICO

S

DRINK WITH THE DEAD Rather than being a time of mourning, it’s a time for celebration when the dead can

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once again share a drink and ‘eat’ their favourite meal. Painstaking preparation ensures everything is perfect for the return of the departed. Altars are erected in homes and graves are elaborately decorated. Because Mexicans believe the spirits can absorb the energies of food and drink, the favourite dishes of the deceased, usually tacos and mole (see page 75), are cooked ready for consumption and their favourite booze, often tequila, is opened to honour them.

LIFE AND DEATH At Panteón General, a large cemetery, students busily create incredible ‘carpets’ from coloured sawdust and sand. Their brilliant images of grinning skeletons and religious icons blur the divide between tradition and Catholicism. Families arrive to dress graves with flowers and candles.

Each element has a special significance: water represents the source of life; candles mean faith, hope and light; fresh flowers show the impermanence of life; copal

Elise Rana, Getty Images

miling skeletons leer at every turn, candy skulls are hawked at each corner and an old lady dangles a flame-haired zombie in my face. The afterlife is all around me as I mingle at Mexico’s Day of the Dead celebrations, where the locals commemorate the return of their loved ones from the spirit world.

TRAVEL 73

Ancient rituals: the festivities stretch back to Aztec times

Flowers of the Dead: Zempasuchil skulls can be seen throughout Mexico

NEED TO KNOW

incense is burnt to clear away bad spirits and to help the dead find their way home; and an arch made of sugarcane signifies the passage between life and death.

HIT THE TEQUILA In the evening, on the way to another cemetary in Xoxocotlan, events take a surreal turn for me and my posse of Aussie ‘deadheads’ as our western attitudes to death are seriously challenged.

The streets leading up the cemetery are lined with bars and food stalls so that everyone can get into the ‘spirit’ of things.

A few tequila sunrises warm us up as we sit and watch the crowds flow past and it’s such a fiesta atmosphere that it’s easy to forget that dead people are around us.

Entering the

cemetery is like stepping onto the set of Beetlejuice. Decorated graves are lit by candlelight, and families of the deceased hold vigils in the hope of reconnecting with the other side. The air is thick with incense and alive with songs softly murmured into the darkness. Our presence would feel intrusive if there weren’t so many Mexican tourists brandishing camera phones and posing for photos behind gravestones.

BREAD OF THE DEAD The fever behind the build-up to Day of the Dead is incredible; the Mexican people can spend all year preparing for the event and take the customs and their beliefs very seriously. Paper bunting hangs on almost every ceiling and across streets, and wispy skeletal faces rustle in the breeze. Bakeries offer massive piles of Bread of the Dead – round loaves encrusted with a cross and skull. Candy skulls decorated with luminous icing and sequin eyes glint like jewels in the sunshine on the steps to the town hall. Alongside, sugar models of your dearly departed’s favourite food or a quaint coffin with a tequila drip are sold. Since death spares no one, all types of human kitsch

Zoe Harris, Elise Rana, Getty Images

WHEN TO GO October 28 to November 1. Temperatures in Oaxaca range from 12-26ºC with cool nights and sunny days.

GETTING THERE It’s cheaper to get a non-direct flight and transfer in Canada or the USA. Flights range between £500-£700 to Mexico City or find a cheap deal to Cancun from £350. From Mexico City or Cancun, take an internal flight or go overland – there’s plenty to see on the way.

GETTING AROUND The bus is king in Mexico. With ‘premiere clase’ you will get aircon and fully reclining seats, and there will always be a very loud action movie playing!

VISAS A tourist card is issued on arrival. Kiwis get 180 days and Aussies and South Africans up to 90.

CURRENCY Mexican Peso. 1 GBP = 19.8 Mexican Peso (MXN). US Dollars are widely accepted.

LANGUAGE Spanish.

GOING OUT A litre of beer is about 20MXN from a store, and about 10MXN for a 330ml bottle in a bar.

Eat tacos or hot dogs on the street for about 10MXN. ACCOMMODATION You will pay from 60 to 120 MXN for a dorm in Oaxaca and between 80– 150 for a basic hotel room.

SEE visitmexico.com.

The dead can “ again share their favourite drink ”

BIG TRIP MACABRE MEXICO

Zoe Harris

figures are crafted from fondant and paper-mâché; there’s miners, nurses, soldiers, teachers and even prostitutes.

BACK TO THE START The festival has its origins in Aztec culture and shouldn’t be confused with the Halloween celebrations we’re familiar with. The main celebration dates are from October 31 to November 1, but from October 28 the souls of those who died violent deaths can return. The 29th is the day for the unbaptised; lonely souls come back on the 30th; and at 3pm on the 31st the ‘Angelitos’ (or children who died after being baptised) return until 3pm on the 1st, making way for adults to step back into the world of the living for a day.

Those in the know reckon Oaxaca has the most authentic Day of the Dead celebrations in Mexico due to its large indigenous population and keen sense of tradition. Locals also recommend Pátzcuaro, a small island in a lake of the same name, near the city of Morelia in the state of Michoacán. Here you can see the whole island lit up at night with candlelight and groups of young Mexicans flock there for the all-night drinking bonanza.

Creel

MEXICO

Spend a little time with the corpses of Guanajuato

Guanajuato Morelia Patzcuaro

MEXICO CITY Oaxaca

LIFE AFTER DEATH? It’s been a long and emotional few days in Mexico and my newly-opened eyes are no match for sleep. It won’t be my final rest by any means, but as I drift off I decide that, after the spiritual immersion I’ve experienced during the past few days, if I was dead I would definitely return to partake in the festivities at Oaxaca.

Hell, I might even down a tequila or two!

NEXT WEEK: VIETNAM

Discover the ‘real Vietnam’ by visiting the Mekong Delta

STUFF YOURSELF DISCOVER MEXICO’S BIZARRE FOOD Described as ‘crunchy and like dry roasted peanuts’, chapulines (salted grasshoppers) are more popular than nachos in the state of Oaxaca. Visit the market to see baskets stacked high with the deep-fried critters.

Dig into the classic mole poblano; chicken breast smothered in a thick chocolate and chilli sauce, served with rice. It’s rich, spicy and sweet all at once. Every Mexican family has a secret recipe but for the real McCoy,

try it in its birthplace Puebla.

It would be hard to have a night out without Mexico’s most famous export: tequila. The worm is a marketing ploy aimed at gullible gringos, though in Oaxaca you may want to get an authentic side dish of ‘worm powder’ with your shot: fried larvae ground with chilli peppers, salt and lime.

Should you overindulge in the Copper Canyon town of Creel, then head to the Hospital for Hangovers, where they swear that a drink made from ant excretions will ease any sore head.

TRAVEL

Different perspective: your attitudes to death will be challenged in Mexico

Head to Guanajuato, in Mexico’s Northern Central Highlands, a colourful city with subterranean streets. Just outside of town, a Mummy Museum houses unclaimed corpses, perfectly preserved in the temperate climate.

Most are naked but some still have the remnants of their socks sagging loosely at their ankles. The most shocking ones include the mother with the unborn child and the woman who was buried alive, her hands clawing at the coffin roof and her mouth open in a scream.

Next door, the Salon of the Cult of Death displays such delights as rusty old chastity belts, a spiked coffin complete with a tortured skeleton left in purgatory since the Inquisition, ‘scary’ holograms and the world’s smallest mummy, a bandaged foetus. Not for the faint hearted!

75

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EGYPT PARTY WITH THE PHAROAHS - 6 days CLASSIC KING TUT - 9 days CLASSIC KING RAMSES - 13 days CLASSIC ROAD TO JORDAN - 16 days

JORDAN CHRISTMAS IN PETRA - 8 days NEW YEARS WADI RUM - 8 days

TURKEY CHRISTMAS TURKEY - 12 days

£369 £429 £579 £999 £749 £779 £649

RUSSIA

THE SNOW BALL - 6 days £469 CHRISTMAS KREMLINS TSARS - 9 days £699 £649 THE BIG CHILL - 9 days NEW YEARS RED SQUARE - 9 days £649

MOROCCO CHRISTMAS IN MOROCCO - 8 days ROCK THE KASBAH - 10 days SURF THE NEW YEAR - 11 days

Plan ahead for you festive fun!

• • • •

Secure your tour with a deposit Pay off your tour month by month No single supplements and no local payments 100% protected holidays

• Best accommodation used - up to 5* rated • Local, qualified and enthusiastic guides!

BOOK WITH CONFIDENCE DON’T GET A SUBSTANDARD TOUR WITH A NON-BONDED OPERATOR. WE’RE ABTA, ATOL AND AITO PROTECTED – INVALUABLE!

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GO BEHIND THE IRON CURTAIN AND DISCOVER PUKKA RUSSIA £339 £389 £499 £699

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93 9 DAYS from

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No silly local payments

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NEW YEAR’S NY E higher tha n Kosciusko !

EST! AND B GEST IG B , L IGINA HE OR ST...T SKIFE

PARIS XMAS & SKIFEST NYE COMBO

All-inclusive

£629

TRAVEL

26 DEC-2 JAN All-inclusive ✔ 7 Nights Risoul ✔ Flights & airport transfers

£749

95

■ Paris & Risoul

24 DEC-3 JAN All-includive ✔ 2 Nights Paris ✔ 7 Nights Risoul ✔ Coach Transfers

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UNBEATABLE VALUE! SKIFEST PRICE INCLUDES:

4/6-Share Apartments £499 (self-cater), £569 (all-inclusive) ✔ For singles & small groups we simply match you up with other Skifest travellers in our four-share apartments ✔ Twin & Triple share also available SKIFEST XMAS FLIGHT TOUR ■ Club Hotel Tignes, French Alps 19-26 DEC

Hotel Twin/Triple Share £699 (all-inclusive) ✔ Skifest flight tours always sell out early, get in quick!

Book Online at

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RUGBY UNION

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£139

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Coach Day Tour

SPRINGBOKS

EXPERIENCE XMAS & NYE IN THE LAND OF THE PHARAOHS!

24 DEC-2 JAN

£149 £80 £149 fr£189

✔ One/Two Nights Hotel in Paris & Eurostar ✔ Match Ticket

EGYPT XMAS & NYE ■ 10 Day Tour

SAT 6 NOV SAT 13 NOV SAT 20 NOV SAT 27 NOV

■ AUS v Wales Coach Tour or Hostel ■ AUS v England Twickenham ■ AUS v Italy Two Nights Florence ■ AUS v France Stade de France, Paris

✔ Depart Thurs night & return Tues morning ■ Hostels/Hotel

£50 DEPOSIT

✔ Return transport from London (coach or flights) ✔ Meals every day at the resort ✔ Funky Skifest merchandise SECURES YO UR ✔ Ski runs right at our doorstep PLACE ✔ Ski or snowboard hire for the whole week ✔ 6/7 nights accommodation staying right on the snow ✔ Unforgettable Xmas & NYE celebrations in the snow ✔ 6 days lift pass with huge variety of runs for every ability ✔ All our accommodation is at an incredible 1850m-2100m ✔ Amazing ski & snowboard terrain up to 3,000-3,500m ✔ Legendary Skifest parties & nightlife

£37 £39 £99

EUROPE’S BIGGEST NYE PARTY IN EDINBURGH! ■ 3 Night Hostel & Hotel 30 DEC-2 JAN £199/£239 ■ 4 Day Coach/Hostel Tour 30 DEC-2 JAN £259 ✔ Accom ideally located in the absolute heart of town ✔ Edinburgh street party pass ✔ Superb pubs, bars & clubs ✔ Funky tour t-shirt ✔ Experienced Fanatics tour reps ✔ Countdown New Year’s for all the world’s time zones!

BOOK ONLINE NOW! www.thefanatics.com or call 0207 240 3223 COVENT GARDEN OFFICE 1st

Floor, 15 New Row, Covent Garden, WC2N 4LD Mon-Fri 9am-6.30pm tntmagazine.com

TOURS

■ Risoul, French Alps

£759

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OKTOBERFEST 2010 COACH? CAMP? HOTEL? FLIGHT? The choice is yours!

We are the largest UK operator to Munich and cover the entire fest (18 Sept ng from £99 Hotel packages Coach tours from £199 Accom only campi

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tours and Join the BEERFEST EXPERTS at Munich’s famous Thalkirchen camp – coach SOLD! last accommodation places filling fast. HURRY – OVER 2500 PP SEATS ALREADY

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AMST ERDA M AUGUST BANK HOLIDAY WEEKEND

HOGMANY 2010/2011 EDINBURGH 2010/2011 - EUROPES BIGGEST NEW YEARS EVE PARTY TOUR DATES: 30TH DEC - 2ND JAN

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Hostel Accommodation Only FROM £219 Hotel Accommodation Only FROM £249 Coach Tours FROM £269 Hi Speed Trains Tours FROM £319

GREAT VALUE LONG WEEKEND COACH TOUR – TOP ACCOM PLUS BREAKFAST AND DINNER INCLUDED!

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Awesome Value

WEEKEND BREAKS AND DAY TOURS

with entrances included at...

OVERNIGHT

Visit the 3 must see destinations in the UK all in one weekend.

Staying overnight in luxury at the Hilton hotel.

Tour Includes: Return luxury coach travel, guided city sightseeing tours of Oxford & Bath, entrance to Stonehenge, overnight accommodation at the Hilton Hotel with buffet dinner & breakfast included & services of an Anderson Tours Tour Manager.

Only

£109

Fri 17th - Sun 19th Sept Our three day Paris tour whisks you to the most beautiful and romantic city in the world. With plenty of free time to do as you please or take our optional cruise on the Seine river or Cabaret show.

Tour Includes: Return Eurostar travel and transfers, guided sightseeing tour of Paris, 2 nights B&B hotel accommodation & services of an Anderson Tours Tour Manager.

Only

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Based in the lively beach side resort town of Ostend, you are in the perfect location to explore the Venice of the North Brugge boasting a labyrinth of canals, medieval buildings, cathedrals, bars and restaurants. Tour Includes: Two nights B&B hotel accommodation, visit to Brugge, Brussels & Antwerp, return luxury coach travel & cross channel ferry & services of an Anderson Tours Tour Manager.

Only

£199

HOLLAND & BELGIUM Fri 17th - Sun 19th Sept Endless canals, bustling nightlife, the red-light district. This tour takes you on a sightseeing tour of Amsterdam and a visit to Brugge on the way home. Tour includes 2 nights hotel accommodation with breakfasts, 3 course dinners & free bar included! Return coach & ferry travel, visit to a cheese & clog factory & services of an Anderson Tours Tour Manager.

Only

£199

AUGUST BANK HOLIDAY BREAKS SAT 28TH - MON 30TH AUGUST 2010 BELGIUM Tour Includes: Two nights B&B hotel accommodation in the beach side resort town of Ostend, famous for it’s nightlife, visit to Brugge, Brussels & Antwerp, return luxury coach travel, return cross channel ferry & services of an Anderson Tours Tour Manager.

Only

£189

PARIS BY EUROSTAR Tour Includes: Return Eurostar travel and transfers, guided city sightseeing tour, 2 nights B&B hotel accommodation - all rooms ensuite, plenty of free time to enjoy the sights and shopping in the City of Light & services of an Anderson Tours Tour Manager. Only GERMANY RHINELAND Tour Includes: Return luxury coach travel, return cross channel ferry crossings, 2 nights hotel accommodation with breakfasts, dinners and free bar for 2 hours in the evening, cruise on the Rhine River, visit to a traditional Weinhaus, half day stopover in Ghent (Belgium) & services of an Anderson Tours Tour Manager. Only

£245 £199

PARIS & CHAMPAGNE REGION Tour Includes:

Day trips Including return coach travel, entrances, guided city sightseeing tour & services of a Tour Manager Fri 27th Aug Sat 28th Aug Sun 29th Aug Sun 5th Sep Fri 10th Sep Sat 11th Sep Sat 18th Sep Sun 19th Sep Sat 25th Sep

Stonehenge Private Viewing Morning A Day in Wales Cambridge Cotswolds Stonehenge Private Viewing Morning Cambridge A day in Wales Stratford & Warwick Castle Oxford, Stratford & the Cotswolds

£77 £49 £45 £45 £77 £45 £49 £49 £65

Plus Stonehenge & Bath 7 days a week from just £46 and Windsor, Eton & Oxford daily from just £25

LUXURY MINI COACH TOURS Operating 7 days a week: Stonehenge, Avebury, Glastonbury & Challice Well Oxford, Stratford & Cotswolds Villages Every Saturday & Sunday: Leeds Castle, Canterbury & the White Cliffs of Dover

£65 £65 £65

BOOK ONLINE 24 HOURS A DAY!

Return coach travel & return cross channel ferry, 2 nights B&B hotel accommodation, entrance to Taittinger and Pommery Champagne Houses including a glass of champagne at each visit, plenty of free time & services of an Anderson Tours Tour Manager.

Only HOLLAND & BELGIUM Tour Includes: Return luxury coach travel & cross channel ferry crossings, 2 nights B&B hotel accommodation, 3 course evening meals & buffet breakfast provided at the hotel including free bar for 2 hours, excursion to Brugge, plenty of free time to explore & services of an Anderson Tours Tour Manager. Only

£209 £199

BOOK ONLINE AT:

www.andersontours.co.uk or call 0207 436 9304 Anderson Tours Travel Shop, 81 Charlotte Street, London W1T 4PP

Anderson Tours is fully bonded

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LONELY PLANET GUIDE on 20 Aug departures onwards

CROATIA & SLOVENIA – 4 DAYS 3 NIGHTS WAS £209 NOW £178

A weekend in Krakow, thermal baths in Budapest, a great eastern European insight.

PRAGUE TO BUDAPEST – 7 DAYS 6 NIGHTS

WAS £419 NOW £356 / STUDENTS £399 NOW £339

HUNGARY & CROATIA – 3 DAYS 2 NIGHTS WAS £149 NOW £127 Use promocode ‘LATE’. Valid on bookings from September onwards. Book by 29 Aug.

Beach parties on Pag, the Emerald River adventure in Bled, the Schnapps farm party in Salzburg and then Prague.

SPLIT, CROATIA TO PRAGUE – 7 DAYS 6 NIGHTS

WAS £399 NOW £339 / STUDENTS £379 NOW £322

Serbian night life in Belgrade, the buzz of Sarajevo, café culture in Sofia and the gateway to Asia, Istanbul.

SPLIT TO ISTANBUL – 6 DAYS 5 NIGHTS

STUDENT DISCOUNT

£629 / STUDENTS £599 POLAND, SLOVAKIA, HUNGARY, AUSTRIA & CZECH REPUBLIC OPTION 1: Krakow to Prague - 22nd Dec OPTION 2: Prague to Krakow - 22nd Dec Both Treks meet in Budapest Boxing Day for a massive party!

WAS £409 NOW £348 / STUDENTS £389 NOW £331 PHONE (LOCAL RATE) 08452 578 345 // OFFICE@EASTERNTREKKER.COM // WWW.EASTERNTREKKER.COM

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97 TOURS

PARIS SUMMER SPECIAL

BELGIUM Fri 3rd - Sun 5th Sept

TRAVEL

HILTON- OXFORD, STONEHENGE & BATH Sat 28th August

TOURS

98

star tours

28/08 Edinburgh Military Tattoo and Festival fr £279p/p Includes return coach,B/B Hotel Accom,Ticket to the final performance of Tattoo. Great sightseeing. Limited Seats.

28/08-30/08 Brussels and Brugge Long Weekend fr only £165 Includes return coach and ferries, 2 nights hostel accom b/b, sightseeing in both Brussels and Brugge. Free time.

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TRAVEL

AUGUST Sat 28th Stonehenge and Bath from £24 Sat 28th Warwick Castle, Stratford from £32 & Oxford Sun 29th Stonehenge and Bath from £24 Sun 29th Oxford and Cotswolds from £24 Mon 30th Leeds Castle and Canterbury from £24 SEPTEMBER Sat 4th Stonehenge and Bath from £24 Sat 4th Denbies Wine & Mercedes Benz World from £35 Sun 5th Longleat House & Safari Park from £24 Sun 5th Stonehenge and Bath from £24 Sat 11th Stonehenge and Bath from £24 Sat 11th Salisbury, Stonehenge and Bath Mega Day from £32 Sun 12th Canterbury and Dover Castle from £24 Sun 12th Stonehenge and Bath from £24

Check out our new TourSearch at tntmagazine.com/ toursearch. We’ve done the legwork so you don’t need to, and put thousands of tours in one place.

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August Bank holiday 28th - 30th August BOOK NOW!!

Amsterdam & Brugge

from £199

Brussels & Brugge

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Cumbria & The Lake District

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Normandy D Day Beaches

from £199

Paris & Versailles

from £165

HORSE RIDING IN WALES 18/09/10, 02/10/10, 16/10/10, 30/10/10 ISLE OF WIGHT 11/09/10, 02/10/10, 06/11/10 NORMANDY D DAY LANDING BEACHES 10/09/10, 08/10/10, 05/11/10 AMSTERDAM 24/09/10, 22/10/10, 19/11/10 BRUGGE 11/09/10, 02/10/10, 30/10/10 CARDIFF CASTLE WELSH BANQUETS 18/09/10, 02/10/10, 16/10/10,30/10 PARIS & VERSAILLES 17/09/10, 15/10/10, 12/11/10, 10/12/10 WEST COUNTRY TOUR 11/09/10, 02/10/10, 06/11/10 COTSWOLD JEWELS 02/10/10, 06/11/10

from £114

Includes: Return coach, Ferries, 2 nights hotel accom B/B, Great sightseeing in both Amsterdam and Brugge. Free Time

Includes: Return coach, Ferries, 2 nights hostel accom B/B Great sightseeing in both Brussels and Brugge. Free Time

Includes: Return Coach, 2 nights hotel accom B/B. Visits to Bowness on Windermere, Grassmere, Keswick, Hawkshead, Whitehaven. Superb scenery !!

Includes: Return Coach, 2 nights hotel accom B/B,TICKET TO THE FINAL PERFORMANCE OF TATTOO on Saturday eve, great sightseeing, trip not to be missed !

from £95 from £114 from £159 from £98 from £98

0845 1300 936 tntmagazine.com

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10% off all Overland Expeditions departing in 2010...

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Next Stop?

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ACCOMMODATION 120

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122

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post your message at tntmagazine.com/seeking or email seeking@tntmagazine.com

on more than one occasion has played me for the fool, but still you manage to polish my crown jewels, in the words of Bill – parting is such sweet sorrow, but I shall see thee on the morrow, on the morrow, on the morrow.

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Tall Aussie Tim in Space, Ibiza: I was the tall blonde you

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Desperately Seeking is a reader forum, and all messages should be within the spirit of the page; TNT cannot take responsibility for offence caused. No phone numbers can be printed. Messages may be edited for publication. See tntmagazine.com/seeking

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Beth. See tntmagazine.com/ seeking

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