TNT Magazine / Issue 1409 by TNT Magazine

WIN A HOLIDAY IN SOUTH AFRICA Live, Work & Travel

August 30-September 5 2010 Issue 1409 tntmagazine.com

HELLO VIETNAM

£1 where sold

Be charmed by the locals in the Mekong Delta

BIKES AND BLADES How to see London on wheels ISLAND PURSUITS Get active in Ibiza

PHILLIP NOYCE The Aussie director tames Angelina Jolie

+ JOBS ■ SPORT ■ LONDON ■ NEWS ■ CINEMA ■ FREIGHT

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this week August 30-September 5/ Issue 1409 Free every Monday tntmagazine.com

Front Cover: Photolibrary

EDITOR’S LETTER Need some inspiration to get out and about before the gloom of winter? If so, we’ve got just what you need. Ibiza is most famous for its nightlife but its outdoors is just as good, from kayaking to cycling and hiking (see page 65); or explore London on wheels (page 10). And to make some cash while getting active, see page 52 for the low-down on jobs in the fitness sector.

74 Get away: Travel down Vietnam’s Mekong Delta

59 TRAVEL

DANIEL LANDON

8 LONDON 8 London Life 10 JOY RIDING: Get your skates on before it gets too cold 12 Food & Drink 14 Spotted 16 Silly Buggers

19 ENTERTAINMENT 19 Celebrity News 20 TNT Life 21 Look Who’s Talking: Kate Miller-Heidke 22 Cinema 23 Culture 24 SPY GAMES: Aussie director Phillip Noyce on working with Angelina

26 MUSIC & CLUBS 26 30 32 33

Music Music Listings Clubbing Clubbing Listings

10 Rollin’ rollin’: Take up a new hobby

34 NEWS & SPORT 34 36 38 41 42 43 44 45 46 48

Australia News New Zealand News South Africa News The Week In Sport Rugby NRL AFL Premier League General SEPTEMBER ACTION: Get the low-down on the AFL finals series

59 Global Vision 60 WHISTLE STOP TOUR: Discover Winchester’s rich past 62 Late Deals 63 TNTT Weekender: Leeds 65 WILD AT HEART: Try out Ibiza’s alternative, active scene 68 Hotshots 70 Travel Tips 71 Travel News 72 On The Road 73 Top Five 74 A RIVER RUNS THROUGH IT: Find hidden treasures in Vietnam 65 Sporting paradise: Get active in Ibiza

51 CAREERS & MONEY 51 Careers 52 FITNESS FREAKS: How to land a job in the fitness sector 54 Money 57 Coming & Going

REGULARS 24 Aussie Phillip Noyce on his latest film, Salt

4 Letters 6 Wins 122 Desperately Seeking

48 Make sure you’re ready for the AFL finals

EDITORIAL Editor Daniel Landon Deputy editor Samantha Baden Subs Laura Adcock | Jahn Vannisselroy Travel editor Janine Kelso Sport editor Tom Sturrock Music editor Alison Grinter Web editor Frankie Mullin Staff writer Rebecca Kent Editorial assistant Inger Smith DIGITAL & IT Head of digital marketing and development Syed Ahmad IT manager Stephen Dann ART & PICTURES Art director Shabir Mahmood Senior Designer Astrid Breacker Designer Laura Doyle Picture editor Shila Sultana Picture researcher Laila Pacheco SALES Publishing director Jeff Perkins Key accounts Charlotte Page Classified sales exec Cameron Knapp MARKETING & EVENTS Head of marketing and events Jim Zambrano Marketing exec Danielle Tessari Marketing and events exec Christina McFarlane Marketing and events assistant Phoebe Cherrill Partnerships manager Jaqui Ward ACCOUNTS Finance director Nick Crampton Accounts Margaret Roberts | Alexandra Buchlakova PRODUCTION Head of production Libby West Production manager Jon Cooke Production assistant Justine Mackay TNT PUBLISHING CEO Kevin Ellis Chairman Ken Hurst Receptionist Lisa Lowe TNT Publishing Ltd Emblem Direct Ltd PRINTED BY St Ives Web Ltd NEWS AAP SAPA NZPA PICTURES AAP AP Alamy Getty Images NZPA PA Photos Photolibrary.com Pictures Colour Library Reuters Rex Features Robert Harding SAPA TNT Images

SAFFAS KNOW BEST I’m a Saffa who likes to braai – a lot. On average about twice a week come sunshine, rain or snow. A lot of non-South Africans ask me what a braai is, and that’s when I lean back, close my eyes and my mouth starts to water. Then I tell them that a braai is the Michelin star version of cooking on fire. All of us from the southern hemisphere obviously have a long tradition of outdoor grilling, but to my disappointment I’ve realised that Aussies and Kiwis just have

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TNT Magazine is printed on paper from sustainable forests. There is no business connection between the proprietors of this magazine and TNT Ltd, the worldwide transportation group. Copyright here and abroad of all original materials is held by TNT Magazine. Reproduction in whole or part is forbidden, except with permission of the publishers. Registered as a newspaper at the Post Office.

➥ TNT 1407 AUG 16-22 INSPIRING STUFF I wanted to say thank you for your Morocco feature in issue 1407. It was perfect timing as my boyfriend and I are planning to go to Marrakesh next year for a wedding. We are now going to stay on for a week and travel around thanks to being inspired by you! I can’t wait to start planning our adventure now. It will definitely have to include a tour to the Sahara. Michelle, via email

➥ TNT 1407 AUG 16-22 TUBE LOATHING Ange’s letter (‘Train dramas’) struck a chord with me. I loathe tube passengers who

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no pride when it comes to buying or cooking theirs. Time after time I’ve been to barbecues with my fellow ‘southies’ and I just cannot believe how people from other so-called ‘barbecue nations’ can be so oblivious to what a

good juicy steak, lamb chop, chicken or fish on fire should taste like. All I’ve ever seen them bring are the cheapest and dodgiest little sausages or burger patties. C’mon guys, that’s something you’d expect from a Pom … Jason, East Putney

Aussies and Kiwis bring “ the cheapest patties and sausages to barbecues ” put their bags on the seat next to them – and I always take great delight in asking them to move their baggage (without saying “please” – they don’t deserve good manners!). I also hate tube passengers who spread out their newspapers and their tubby arms so that they end up infringing on the space of the person next to them (that’s me). If you’re too big for a seat then stand. Sally, Islington

Travel

Discover Iceland’s amazing scenery and nightlife

TOMATINA: YAY OR NAY? Did anyone else hit Tomatina this year? I had an awesome time but have heard mixed reports. We got there pretty early with a tour and got a spot close to the main square. OK, it was crowded, but that’s part of the fun, right? The buzz was amazing – everyone was into the partying spirit. But we met some Aussies from another tour who said they hadn’t got any tomato

Returning home

How to get a head start on finding a job back home

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A VOLUNTEERING HOLIDAY IN SOUTH AFRICA

We’re giving you and a friend the chance to win a volunteering holiday with Aviva at the SANCCOB Penguin Conservation Centre n Cape Town. You’ll learn about the ife-cycle and conservation of the African penguin, an endangered species, and be very ‘hands-on’ as you care for the weak, the strong, the cheeky and the just plain daft, and when the sun is high you’ll probably find yourself longing to join them in the pool too! The centre is located on the banks of Flamingo Vlei with wonderful views of Table Mountain, close to the popular beaches of Blouberg and Big Bay. Your stay will also include various day trips to the surrounding areas, such as the Cape Winelands. Enter at tntmagazine.com/ competitions.

» See aviva-sa.com

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Ireland tour Guidebooks Hot Tub Time Machine DVD Clubbing tickets to Chew The Fat! Clubbing tickets to Liaison A three-day tour of Scotland tour

68 70 72

Photography course Cash and guidebooks A trip to Bath and Stonehenge

PREVIOUS WINNERS TNT 1406: The Gallery clubbing tickets: Francesca Frulla, Karl Chads

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“IT’S YOUR JOCKEY, ARE YOU HERE OR NOT?”

THE 4TH ASCOT RACECOURSE BEER FESTIVAL Friday 24th and Saturday 25th September 2010 • Admission starts from just £11 on Friday and £20 on Saturday. Save 25% when you quote TNT*. • Excellent programme of racing. • Over 200 real ales, ciders and perries to sample supplied predominantly from local craft brewers, all at £1.40 per half pint and £2.80 per pint. Free tasting notes provided. • Gates and Bars open at 11am. Last orders 5.20pm. • Hot and cold food available all day. • Live music on both days. • Free parking or a 7 minute walk from Ascot Railway Station.

To book, call 0870 727 1234 or visit ascot.co.uk *Conditions of entry to Ascot Racecourse apply, pre-booked tickets only, max per order is 9 and cannot be used in conjunction with any other offer.

ED LIMIT N EDITIO orative

em Comm ailable v s s Gla A

LONDON LIFE

WHAT’S ON Tom Sturrock PICKS THE BEST OF LONDON THIS WEEK

LONDON

PORTOBELLO FILM FESTIVAL FREE WHAT: It’s one of Europe’s biggest and most popular showcases of independent films, set up at various locations around west London. There are also accompanying presentations and workshops for film buffs. And it’s all free. WHEN: September 2-19. DO IT BECAUSE: Portobello Road remains a London landmark thanks to its authenticity and slightly chaotic vibe. Any film festival here, particularly one that has received its share of acclaim, is sure to be good fun and full of surprises.

» In and around Notting Hill

Ladbroke Grove

(portobellofilmfestival.com).

Capital idea: Little Venice One of the most enjoyable aspects of life in a big city is that there are well-kept secrets; that’s not to say Little Venice, a secluded enclave in Maida Vale, is completely off the radar but the fact it never seems to be over run with visitors certainly adds to its appeal. Little Venice’s central pond, which snakes off in different directions, is the junction of Regent’s Canal and the Paddington arm of Grand Union Canal, meaning that,

once upon a time, it would have been absolutely heaving with barges carrying cargo west from the docks. It’s far more sedate these days; the banks are lined with cafés – they actually know how to make coffee – and the back streets are home to several small boutique theatres. It’s one of London’s most pleasant, low-key spots. TS

SUMMIT CONFERENCE FREE

MAYOR OF LONDON’S SKY RIDE FREE

This Fringe Festival production (below) depicts a fictional meeting between the mistresses of Hitler and Mussolini, all performed in an exquisite 18th-century mansion.

The streets of the capital get taken over by cyclists in a bid to encourage Londoners to get around on two wheels. If you love your bike, it’s a great chance to own the streets.

» 33 Portland Pl, W1B 1QU

» Various routes, hubs

Great Portland Street (camdenfringe.org). Until Sep 4

around central London (goskyride.com). Sun, Sep 5

» 4 Warwick Crescent, W2 6NE Warwick Avenue GREAT FOR: AUTUMN PICNICS

BRITAIN EXPLAINED LONDON BY NUMBERS

16,336 Source: zsl.org

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Fifty years ago this week the British Government allowed legal betting shops, known as ‘bookmakers’, to open. In a move backed by Archbishop of Canterbury Dr Geoffrey Fisher, the Conservative Government was galvanised into making changes by the inconsistency of the laws on gambling. At the time, bridge clubs were being held in bus shelters and punters wanting to bet on the horses had to telephone the

bookies, who would then send ‘runners’ out to collect or pay out the cash. After the reforms were finalised, betting shops started opening at a rate of 100 a week. Six months later, when the Government proposed new laws that placed harsher penalties on illegal street betting, there were already 10,000 shops set up. These days, there are about 8500 bookies in the UK. SIMON WILLMORE

Getty Images, Pawel Libera

Number of animals who call London Zoo home

LEGALISED GAMBLING

SUNDAYS @

PARTRIDGES FOOD MARKET FREE

RICKY GERVAIS: SCIENCE £37

This west London institution is great for food, with some of the Moroccan dishes particularly tasty. It’s quite posh but, fortunately, good food doesn’t discriminate.

This bloke must love working. He doesn’t need the money but he’s back doing it live. His stand-up is almost good enough for him to be forgiven for The Invention of Lying.

» Duke of York Sq, SW3 4LU

» Hammersmith Apollo,

South Kensington (partridges.co.uk/foodmarket). Sat, 10am-4pm

45 Queen Caroline St, W6 9QH Hammersmith (rickygervais.com). Sep 6-11

SUNDAY SEPTEMBER 5TH

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BBC TELEVISION CENTRE TOURS FROM £7.50

THE PRINTED IMAGE IN CHINA FREE

Go behind the scenes at the BBC’s sprawling White City headquarters to see where some of the most iconic programmes in British television get put together.

China invented printing in about 700AD – it’s another example of China being miles ahead of the curve with technology that later became central to modern life.

» BBC Television Centre,

» British Museum, WC1B

Wood Ln, W12 7RJ White City (bbc.co.uk/ showsandtours).

3DG Tottenham Court Road (britishmuseum.org). Until Sep 5

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LONDON 11

GO KARTING Leisurely activities are all well and good, but if you’ve got a need for speed then go karting is the perfect way to fulfil it. Streatham Go Karting (gokarting.co.uk) offers a variety of packages for small and large groups. The grand prix isn’t cheap at about £40 per person, but it is value for

Michael Steele, Getty Images, Matt Crossick / PA Wire

CYCLING If your bike is rusting away in the back garden, now is the time to dust it off, give it some oil and hit the road. London is a great place to explore by bike and if you don’t fancy tangling with white vans or black cabs, there are plenty of off-road routes. The Thames path from Richmond to Hampton Court Palace via Kingston makes for a lovely riverside journey as does the Limehouse to Little Venice route along Regents Canal. For a spot of sociable cycling, the London Cycling Campaign (lcc.org.uk) runs organised rides all over London all year round for free. With an organised ride you have the advantage of safety in numbers and experienced marshalls to guide you on a pre-arranged route. Oh, and it’s a great way to meet fellow cycling freaks too. If you don’t own your own bike you can hire them in Richmond Park (at the Roehampton gate), or take advantage of the new Barclays Cycle Hire scheme which allows you to hire

money as you get a warm up round, five heats followed by a semi-final and a final – more than enough time on the track. Take time on the warm up laps to figure out your tactics through the bends – girls, you’re lighter so take the corners tightly and then accelerate off before the boys can pass you.

a bike from one of 400 docking stations all over London. Once you’ve used the bike you simply drop it off at another docking station. Cycling in London just got a whole lot easier.

On the sideline, all the stats are shown on screen including overall positions and fastest laps. You’ll be surprised by how quickly you pick it up and that suppressed competitive streak will soon have you shamelessly fighting for a place on the podium. Lewis Hamilton, eat your heart out.

RIDE THE PEDIBUS What could be better than sightseeing, drinking with your mates and never leaving your seat? Pedibus (pubcrawler.uk.com) is basically a bar attached to wheels that requires a minimum of seven people to pedal it. Cruise around London with your very own bartender as you take in the sights. If you’re more about the drinking than the cycling and there’s a large group of you (25+), the wine tasting tour is ideal, and it’s a great story to tell your mates back home. Pedibus, various start points, (020 0011 3590; pubcrawler.uk.com). From £26

FOOD & DRINK

BAR REVIEW The Prince Albert ★★★★★

LONDON

163 Royal College Street NW1 OSG, 020 7485 0270 Camden Town

THE SCENE The spacious gastro pub vibe seemed heightened by the fact that there were few people there when we visited on a Saturday evening. But the staff were

Tart it up

welcoming and friendly. THE GRUB Our steak and lobster risotto were both delicious and well cooked. But the triple-fried chips were far too salty and our urgent request for bread (we were post-Inception starving!) went unnoticed at first. BEHIND THE BAR A good range of beers and a fairly extensive wine list, which

WHAT YOU NEED: For the pastry: 175g plain flour; ¼ tsp salt; 100g butter; 1 egg white. For the filling: 100ml double cream; 3 egg yolks; 4 pinches cayenne pepper; 100g feta cheese (goat or sheep milk only); 2 tsp dried oregano; 8 sundried tomatoes; pinch of salt. THE WORK: For the pastry: Sift the flour and salt into a bowl. Gently melt the butter and pour into the flour, stirring with a wooden spoon to mix. Add the egg white and

CARNABY STREET FOOD QUARTER Sacred W1F 9BL

continue to stir till a smooth soft dough. Leave it to rest for five minutes so the dough can cool. Then divide into 12 pieces and roll into balls. Put one into each patty tin and press to line the tin so it comes over the edge. Refrigerate for 30 minutes. For the filling: Slice the sundried tomatoes and add a little warm water to re-hydrate. In a mixing bowl, whisk the cream and the eggs together until slightly

thickened, whisk in the cayenne pepper, crumble in the feta, add the oregano, drain the tomatoes and mix, add a little pinch of salt, (remember the feta is salty). Pre-heat the oven to 190˚C. Spoon the mixture into the pastry-lined tin and cook in the centre of the oven for about 20 minutes until golden brown. » See marikas-kitchen.com for details of classes, including her Sunday Pie Making Club.

AFL Grand Final Saturday, September 25 £10 gets you Ó Entry into Elk Bar to watch the AFL Grand Final Ó Free Drink Ó Drink Specials

Book your ticket at

tntmagazine.com

Savour one of London’s best flat whites at the Ganton Street outpost of this fab Kiwi mini-chain. Home-made savoury muffins will have you refuelled in no time.

Cha Cha Moon W1F 9BN Alan Yau’s Cha Cha Moon is just the place to come for great value, authentically Chinese noodles. The broths are particularly impressive – try the veggie monk’s vermicelli.

Dehesa W1F 9BP This tapas bar is just the place to share a board of the finest jamón ibérico carved to order along with a plate of manchego.

TNT Images

587- 591 Fulham Road London SW6 5UB

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ALISON GRINTER

Feta cheese, sundried tomato and oregano tarts

Marika Gauci’s Anglo-Greek heritage means her London cooking classes sizzle with Mediterranean influences while also fitting perfectly into the English obsession with comfort food. These feta cheese, sundried tomato and oregano tartlets are a case in point. They’re also super easy and incredibly impressive. Trust us on this one.

*Venue subject to licence

features tipples from all corners of the globe. BILL PLEASE Our bill came to £80, not bad for three mains and two bottles of wine. VERDICT A pleasant little oasis off the tourist trail in Camden. But a couple of slipups detracted from what otherwise may have been a four-star experience.

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Call us on 020 7373 3377 or come down to the TNT office so we can ID you. You’ve won three Lonely Planet (lonelyplanet.com) guides of your choice. PLUS for another chance to win, log on to tntmagazine.com/ gallery and see if you’ve been circled.

THE BOATHOUSE Putney, Sat, Aug 21 Photos by: Dina Snaith/ TNT Images

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SILLY BUGGERS

I’ve been with my boyfriend five years but living in a new city has expanded my horizons and, even though I love him, I feel we need some time apart. What should I do?

It sounds like you’ve outgrown your boyfriend – your only option is to break up with him; maybe set him up with another girl to soften the blow or, at least, assuage your own guilt. The second time I got married, we went to Goa, on India’s west coast, for our honeymoon. Maybe it was the mind-altering drugs I was

TOOLS OF THE WEEK Randy robbers

eyelashes and nail polish. I was really into her. But then, one day, my mum found Shakaya in my cupboard. She didn’t understand our relationship and insisted I break up with Shakaya or move out. I wasn’t working at the time and we had just had pay TV installed so, regrettably, I ended things. I still think about Shakaya but the sense of loss has subsided into an appreciation of the time we shared. As it will for you. In time.

» Got a sex or relationship dilemma? Email dearreuben@ tntmagazine.com

THINGS THE QUEEN SHOULD DO BEFORE SHE DIES

# 385

SHE’S BEEN HONING HER ACT FOR YEARS – NOW IT’S TIME TO FLASH FOR CASH AT SPEARMINT RHINO

Silly Buggers™

GRAB YOURSELF A BARGAIN FLIGHTS • TOURS • HOLIDAYS • ACCOMMODATION

Saturday, October 16 | 9.30am - 6pm

Sipa Press / Rex Features, Getty Images

If you’re going to break in to a house, surely you wouldn’t film yourself having sex on the floor mid-heist. Surely. An American couple obviously didn’t get that memo. The light-fingered pair broke into a home in Washington state and decided to get into some hanky-panky. They were caught in the act by a neighbour who came to collect the mail and then hot-footed it out of there. But police found a video camera at the scene – also stolen – and used the footage to identify the couple.

It can be hard letting hoeing into or maybe it was go of someone you’re just the island’s vibe but, attached to, even when you released from the strictures of know it’s for the best. our lives back home, I realised I once had a RealDoll called married life wasn’t for me. Shakaya – her skin was made But rather than break my from the same material used new husband’s heart, I set to make prosthetics and her him up with one of the local women at a bar. I drugged him anatomically correct skeleton meant she was and paid the fully poseable, woman to take but in an him home, but entirely I never heard realistic way. from him again She had a so, presumably, range of looks it all worked that could out for the best be rotated, and it certainly down to such helped me Dollface: Shakaya details as move on.

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TRUE LOVE: Oscar-winning Kiwi actress Anna Paquin has married her True Blood vampire-lover Stephen Moyer in a private sunset wedding in Malibu. After the ceremony, the bridal party and guests, including actor Elijah Wood and True Blood co-star Ryan Kwanten, headed down to the beach for the reception. According to Bang Showbiz, Moyer soon swapped his suit for shorts, and jumped into the sea while his missus enjoyed his wet’n’wild antics from the shore. Sounds like they had a splashing time!

A GOOD WEEK FOR

Even though she wore the controversial high-heeled Ugg boots criticised by PETA, Gold Coast stunner Jesinta Campbell came third in this year’s MIss Universe contest. Well, they say beauty is pain …

Getty Images

➩

A BAD WEEK FOR

F1 star Lewis Hamilton was fined AU$500 for “behaving like a hoon”, after pulling a burnout ahead of the Melbourne Grand Prix in March. Someones’s always got to ruin the fun, eh Lewis?

KYLIE ROCKS PUB Heading out to the pub for a drink? You may not expect a top-selling artist to turn up and play an intimate gig for free. But good ol’ neighbourly Kylie Minogue did just that.

The residents of Somerset village Compton Martin were shocked when the Especially For You singer showed up at their local pub Ring O’ Bells to perform as part of an awayday for staff at her record label Parlophone.

“It was all quite surreal, to be honest. It’s not the sort of thing you expect to see in a quiet local pub like this,” landlady Lauren Goddard told the Daily Express. “Kylie was very friendly and down-to-earth.” Surely the baffled locals would’ve thanked their lucky stars for going out for a pint on a night like this, all while nodding along to “I should be so lucky – lucky, lucky, lucky.”

SAY WHAT?

“Whoever’s impersonating me – aim higher.” TV host Conan O’Brien on reports that he’d been dining with Maury Povich and Connie Chung in NYC.

Woman’s Weekly: Fomer Silver Fern Bernice Mene presents baby Jett to the world. New Idea: Shortland Street’s Ben Mitchell opens up about his difficult times, and life as a dad; and radio presenter Jay-Jay Feeney steps in front of the camera in a fashion shoot.

AUSTRALIA Woman’s Day: Home And Away star Kate Ritchie reveals the secrets of her wedding diet; Olivia Newton John has found happiness again after all the misery; and round-theworld sailor Jessica Watson says she’s too busy for school. New Idea: Biggest Loser contestants talk babies and boobs; and Nat Bass has given birth to daughter Harper Rain.

SOUTH AFRICA You: SA actor Sharlto Copley is climbing the career ladder – from District 9 to A-Team hero; Springbok Bryan Habana and wife Janine are enjoying life by the sea, plus is Lourdes even savvier than mum Madonna? Heat: Socialite Khanyi Mbau says a new partner paid for her trip abroad, but is business tycoon Theunis Crous still lurking behind the scenes?

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There are people all around the world who would like to learn English – and you could be the one teaching them. Not only will you get to know the locals, but teaching English as a foreign language is also a great way of combining work with travel. To get you started, TNT and ITT are running TEFL weekend courses for only £130 (normally £200), which includes training on how to structure lessons, as well as a guide to job opportunities. Certificates are recognised

LOOK WHO’S TALKING

The Aussie orchestral-pop songstress is celebrating her inner Carrie Bradshaw after joining new music/dance revue Shoes

ENTERTAINMENT

Kate Miller-Heidke INTERVIEW ALISON GRINTER Tell me about Shoes.

It’s primarily a dance show but I’m one of the singers. The dancers perform in all different kinds of shoes – we’re talking platform heels, thongs, gumboots ugg boots and stilettos. The music is by Richard Thomas, who also co-wrote Jerry Springer The Opera. You played the role of Baby Jane at the Sydney Opera House last year – sounds like an interesting role!

Yes, she was basically a grown woman who enjoys dressing as a toddler and shitting in her nappy and getting her bum smacked. My big number was Mama Give Me Smack On The Asshole. It was an amazing show; complex and moving. It went far beyond the novelty value of singing the word “c**t” on stage. What songs do you sing in Shoes?

One of my songs is called Hush Puppies. The scenario is a man cheating on his partner with three different women and he leaves during the night wearing his Hush Puppies, making no sound. I get to use more of my pop voice; a lot of the other songs are quite classical. Have you done any cool research for the show?

The other day we went to the Christian Louboutin showroom in Islington. It’s his private showroom where they display shoes for next season that aren’t available, and everybody was salivating over these sparkly stilettos that cost £5000 per pair. What’s your own personal shoe style, Imelda Marcos or Mother Teresa?

I probably lean towards Mother Teresa. I usually wear Docs and school shoes, I wear high heels during my gigs but I’ve literally got them waiting side of stage and I step into them just

before I walk on, and they come off as soon as I’m done.

of red and sparkly flat brogues made. They are my Dorothy shoes.

What’s the most glamorous pair of shoes you own?

Your song Are You Fucking Kidding Me? (Facebook Song) is a favourite with your fans. Was it inspired by real life?

We did this big gig in Hanoi, Vietnam to raise awareness of human trafficking in Asia and then we went to this famous tailor town called Hoi An, and I got a pair

Jerry Springer “ The Opera was a moving show ”

Yeah, it was. Basically, I friend requested one of my ex-boyfriends and a week later he still hadn’t accepted, and a month later my friend request was still pending. I started to think about it and put myself in his shoes, so the song is written from his perspective. I was the one who broke it off but I still maintain I did nothing wrong in our relationship. I made the mistake of looking on YouTube, which is not recommended, and read the comments. People were saying that I hate men, which is funny cos the song is written from a man’s perspective. Do you have a new album on the horizon?

The album’s on its way – but it won’t be out until halfway through next year … we’ve started demo-ing things. It’s going to go in a different direction so I need time for the embryo to gestate.

» Shoes at Sadler’s Wells, Rosebery Ave, EC1R 4TN Angel (0844 412 4300; sadlerswells.com). Sep 3-11. £10-£43

YOU DON’T SAY Who would play you in a film about your life? I don’t really think there should be a film of my life, not yet anyway. Nothing that fascinating has happened to me so far. Ask me in 10 years. What did you have for breakfast? Toasted muesli. Usually I have vegemite on toast – it’s a little bit of nostalgia for Australia. What song is guaranteed to get you on the dancefloor? The Grease megamix.

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ENTERTAINMENT

CINEMA

Dinner for Schmucks

SCREEN TEST: STEVE CARELL

Paul Rudd, Steve Carell, Jemaine Clement

STARRING:

RT 110 MINS

1 What role did Carell play in the US version of The Office? 2 Carrell has shared the screen with his real-life wife in one of his films. Which one? 3 What role did Carell play opposite Jim Carrey? 4 Who originally created the character of Maxwell Smart? 5 Which Australian actor starred with Carell in Little Miss Sunshine?

★★★★★

Featuring some of the hottest comedians around, Jay Roach’s latest film is a mouthwatering prospect. Unfortunately, the likes of Paul Rudd, Steve Carell and Kiwi Jemaine Clement are let down by a script that, ironically, lacks bite. Based on French film Le Diner de Cons, the comedy focuses on hard-working executive Tim (Rudd), who is invited by his boss to a “dinner for winners” – a sick evening where execs compete to see who can bring along the biggest idiot. Tim is initially against the idea but when he literally runs into mega-moron Barry (Carell) he sees it as a sign to proceed. Inviting Barry into his life soon has disastrous consequences, though. With all the elements in place for a

cracking black comedy, it’s a pity that Roach only delivers a mildly entertaining film. As you would expect, Carell and Clement (who plays an artist gunning for Tim’s girl) make the most of the dull material, and a calamitous home invasion

and a presentation involving stuffed mice are priceless. But it’s not enough to save Dinner for Schmucks from being a missed opportunity. GOOD FOR: Those with an appetite for half-decent comedies. PIERRE DE VILLIERS

THE REEL DEAL Acclaimed Wellington filmmaker Kathy Dudding has died of lung cancer. Dudding’s feature-length documentary, Asylum Pieces, about changes to attitudes to mental health in New Zealand, was shown at the New Zealand International Film Festival last month, but she had to decline interviews to promote the film. The 49year-old had worked in film for more than 20 years. A spokesman for her family said Dudding – who was not a smoker – discovered she had lung cancer when she returned from the United States in April, after winning a Fulbright Travel Award.

LAST WEEK’S ANSWERS 1 Lisbeth Salander 2 Men who hate women 3 None 4 Stig 5 Eva Gabrielsson, who is in dispute with Larsson’s father and brother. LAST WEEK’S WINNER Stephen Crosbie

JONAH HEX

★★★★★ A great cast – including Josh Brolin and John Malkovich – are largely wasted in this brash, brainless comic adaptation. Brolin does his best as the scarred cowboy out for revenge and Megan Fox is a sexy love interest, but the film moves so quickly there’s no time to fall for the characters. GOOD FOR: Those who want to see Megan Fox half naked. PDV

22 BULLETS

★★★★★ Jean Reno is a vengeful Marseille gangster who sets out to punish those who left him for dead with 22 bullets in his body. Some interesting cinematography and a typically magnetic turn from Reno elevates this to something a bit better than your average revenge drama. GOOD FOR: Those who like The Punisher comics. PDV

Merie Weismiller, Getty Images, Jamie Trueblood

Aussie film star Sam Worthington is to play the lead in spooky new thriller Dracula: Year Zero. The 34-year-old Avatar star (pictured) is to play Prince Vlad, who is believed to have been the inspiration for Bram Stoker’s Dracula, Encore magazine reports. The Universal Pictures project is due to be shot in Australia next year and directed by Dark City’s Alex Proyas. The film follows Prince Vlad the Impaler as he battles the Turks who have invaded Transylvania, and tries to stop them taking all the young, male children.

For a chance to win a copy of Hot Tub Time Machine, starring John Cusack and Rob Corddry out on DVD and Bluray on Aug 30, email answers to grabs@ tntmagazine. com by noon on Wed with ‘Hot Tub’ in the subject line.

WIN

CULTURE INTO THE WOODS There are moments of magic in this inspired revival of Stephen Sondheim’s witty musical twist on the fairytales of the Brothers Grimm. The leafy theatre provides the perfect backdrop for the adventures of the Baker and his barren Wife, who go in search of the ingredients needed to lift the curse of Hannah Waddingham’s vindictive Witch. Their story intertwines with those of Beverly Rudd’s plump Little Red Riding Hood and a sexually predatory Wolf; Rapunzel, Cinderella and their respective Princes (“raised to be charming, not

ENTERTAINMENT

SEE THIS: Theatre sincere”); and Jack and his beanstalk. Things get darker in the second half, with its reminder that getting what you wish for doesn’t guarantee happiness – but this inventive production proves an unmissable summer treat. LOUISE KINGSLEY

» Open Air Theatre, Inner Circle, Regent’s Park, NW1 4NR Baker Street (openairtheatre.org). Until Sep 11. From £20

TNT online For more reviews of events in London go to tntmagazine.com/londonlife

WORTH A LOOK Life in the city isn’t necessarily what you might think in The Maddening Rain » Old Red Lion, 418 St John St, EC1V 4NJ

Piccadilly Circus (sohotheatre.com). Until Sep 4. From £20

EXHIBITION OF THE WEEK

BOOKS OUT THIS WEEK

WALLACE COLLECTION

THE BEDWETTER

MINI SHOPAHOLIC

Sarah Silverman

Sophie Kinsella

(HarperCollins) SEP 2

(Bantam) SEP 2

Promising stories of courage, redemption and pee, US stand-up comedian Sarah Silverman brings her signature taboo-busting humour to this hilarious collection of autobiographical essays.

In this follow-up to Confessions Of A Shopaholic, heroine Becky Brandon thinks having a daughter is a dream come true: a shopping friend for life! But it doesn’t quite work out.

A JOURNEY

CRAZY DAYS

Tony Blair

Sadie Frost

★★★★★

Stuffed to the rafters with stunning furniture, porcelain and Old Master paintings, this giant historic house museum in Marylebone was once home to Lady Wallace, who bequeathed it – and its incredible collection – to the nation in 1897. Marvel at the

Catherine Ashmore, British Tourist Authority

•La Boheme is based on Puccini’s opera but set in contemporary Soho –

Angel (oldredliontheatre.co.uk). Aug 31-Sep 18. From £11

sounds weird but it works » Soho Theatre, 21 Dean St, W1D 3NE

Canalettos and Rembrandts or lose yourself in the incredible collection of armoury. The café gets special mention too – one of London’s loveliest settings for a cuppa. SAMANTHA BADEN

» Manchester Sq, W1U 3BN Bond Street (wallacecollection.org). Daily. Free

(Hutchinson) SEP 1

(John Blake Publishing)

From the biggest Labour election victory in history to the barneys with Gordy over who should be prime minister, the former UK leader reveals intimate details of his political and personal journey.

SEP 6

Jude Law’s exmissus and hellraising Primrose Hill socialite tells of her bohemian upbringing, marriage to Spandau Ballet’s Gary Kemp and partying with bezzie mate Kate Moss.

MORE EXHIBITIONS Baghdad, 5 March 2007: A Project with Jeremy Deller features a car salvaged from the bombing, which killed 38 people and injured many more, of the historic Al-Mutanabbi street book market in Baghdad » Imperial War Museum, SE1 6HZ Lambeth North (iwm.org.uk). From Sep 9. Free with museum entry

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SPY GAMES

Australian filmmaker Phillip Noyce on Angelina Jolie, his early life as a stalker and why Tom Cruise was mission impossible WORDS WILL LAWRENCE

ustralian filmmaker Phillip Noyce, who directed international superstar Angelina Jolie in her kinetic spy thriller Salt, knows a thing or two about espionage. Growing up in Griffith, New South Wales, he heard real-life tales of behindthe-lines skulduggery from his father, who had worked for Z Special Unit, a specialist reconnaissance and sabotage unit, training operatives on Fraser Island, off the east coast of Australia, during WWII.

FATHER FIGURE “I grew up on stories of espionage, of trickery and chicanery,” begins the affable, 60-year-old director. “My father was training secret operatives to enter behind Japanese lines. “He trained Indo-Chinese and plenty of

I would spy on “ people in my little country town ” Vietnamese. I remember him telling me about one of the Vietnamese guys he was teaching, who said that it wasn’t the Japanese he wanted overthrown, it was the French! “More and more of his stories came out in his last years. It was brutal warfare and brutal methods.”

SPY GAMES His father’s tales had a profound effect on

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him, and Noyce describes how, as a child, he’d act out his own missions. “I would spy on people in my little country town. I’d fix myself on somebody who was walking in the street and follow them at a distance, while trying to work out their secret lives. You’d probably get arrested for it nowadays!”

CALL OF THE SCREEN Despite his love of undercover sleuthing, Noyce decided against following his father’s vocation, enrolling instead at the Australia Film & Television Institute in Sydney when he was 23 years old. Four years later, he released his first professional film. His break-through in the US came with 1989’s Dead Calm, a watery thriller that brought Nicole Kidman to international renown. He followed that with hit thrillers Patriot

Games (1992) and Clear and Present Danger (1994), starring Harrison Ford, and more personal, affecting films like Rabbit-Proof Fence (2002) and Catch a Fire (2006). “It’s kind of cool,” continues Noyce, “while I never wanted to be a spy as an adult, the beauty of being a film director is that you can play every type of character: the goodies, the baddies, the males the females. So I’ve played many spies. Harrison Ford was fun to be for a while, but I must say that Angelina is even more fun. Making Salt was wonderful.”

ACTION HERO The film’s director and star have worked together previously, when Noyce directed Jolie on one of her early thrillers, The Bone Collector, back in 1999. “Angelina has matured a lot and she needed to,” Noyce recalls. “She was never

ENTERTAINMENT 25

Andrew Schwartz

nervous, but back then she was finding her feet. “When she came back 12 years later, though, she was a fully mature, experienced actress, an icon who walks the tight-rope of combining a career with a complex private life. “There are plenty of male action heroes who are OK actors, but there’s only one Academy Award-winning actress who is among the best action heroes out there.”

WOMEN’S WORK In truth, the character of Salt, an undercover operative working for the CIA who finds herself the centre of a complex, twisting tale, was written for a man. Tom Cruise was considered, but the head of the studio had a better idea. “The way it worked out, I think the character is more interesting as a woman, both as an action hero and with regards to the complexity of her private life,” Noyce says. “It’s funny though, because when we were trying to find a man for the role, the studio head said, ‘You know, I think Angelina is the right man to play the role.’ And she was right!”

» Salt is in cinemas now.

Phillip Noyce on set with Angelina Jolie

FILM VERDICT WHAT THE CRITICS SAY “Noyce marshals the crunches and bangs well, and it zips along at a pace sufficient enough to keep the paranoia alive. Never entirely predictable – it’s further confirmation of Jolie’s action goddess status.” William Thomas, Empire “Jolie looks impressive, especially as she’s obliged to be both punchbag … and

femme. Sometimes, when the editing is at its best, she succeeds in giving the impression of being an assassin.” Sukhdev Sandhu, The Telegraph “Phillip Noyce’s neo-cold-war action thriller ... could well be this year’s top summer movie. It’s pacy, subversive and knocked out with such verve that you’re not even bothered by how far-fetched it all is.” Peter Bradshaw, The Guardian

MUSIC

MUSIC & CLUBS

ALBUM OF THE WEEK

!!! Koko, Nov 4 (0870 432 5527). £15 Airbourne Brixton Academy, Dec 2 (0844 477 2000). £17.50 Arcade Fire The O2, Dec 1 (0844 856 0202). £30 Sarah Blasko Electric Ballroom, Nov 17 (0870 264 3333). £12.50

KATY PERRY Teenage Dream (EMI)

FAST FORWARD

★★★★★

Do we blame Russell Brand, Perry’s hirsute sex-addict boyfriend with a funny bone, for this perverse offering? Certainly, it’s coursing with his kind of smut, only it is terribly misguided. The Californian starlet charmed us one album ago with cutesy bubblegum pop. But Teenage Dream, save for less than a handful of

tracks – including the poolparty pop anthem the title track is destined to be – is painfully embarrassing. “I wanna see your peacock, cock, cock,” she raps in Peacock, where the album

takes a raunchy turn that sees it sink into something more like a teenage wet dream – the minx-with-attitude schtick so incredibly transparent. Sex has safer ground, Perry. REBECCA KENT

RICHARD THOMPSON

THE GOO GOO DOLLS

RED VELVET CAR

Dream Attic (Proper Records) Brit guitar god and founding member of folk act Fairport Convention puts out a live LP of new tracks.

Something For The Rest Of Us

Heart (Eagle Records) After a six-year hiatus the Seattle rock balladeers behind classics such as Barracuda are back.

ALSO OUT (Warner Bros)

’90s alternative stalwarts return with their 9th LP, in part produced by Butch Vig.

MUSIC NEWS Sydney on December 13 and Perth on December 18. The support act will be Jay-Z who, according to Forbes magazine, was the world’s richest rapper for the year to June 2010, earning US$63m.

CHARTS

Veteran singer and all-round music industry hate figure Sting is on the hunt for Kiwi musos. The ex-Police frontman is the headliner for the Sting at the Mission Concert in Napier in February – but apparently his normal five-piece backing band isn’t enough, stuff.co.nz reported. So organisers are on the hunt for 50 local classical musicians to join Sting on stage to ensure the gig has full orchestral backing.

AUSTRALIA

NEW ZEALAND

SOUTH AFRICA

No 1 single Love The Way You Lie, Eminem feat. Rihanna No 1 album Recovery, Eminem

No 1 single Dynamite, Taio Cruz No 1 album The Final Frontier, Iron Maiden

No 1 single Billionaire, Travie McCoy feat. Bruno Mars No 1 album Now That’s What I Call Music 55, various artists

No 1 single Green Light, Roll Deep No 1 album The Final Frontier, Iron Maiden

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Hoodoo Gurus Shepherds Bush Empire, Oct 3 (0844 477 2000). £19.50 Hugh Masekela and The Mahotella Queens Royal Festival Hall, Nov 12 (0871 663 2501). £10-£27.50 Ozzy Osbourne The O2, Sep 18 (0844 277 4321). £40 Pendulum Wembley Arena, Dec 3 (0844 815 0815). £25 The Parlotones Shepherds Bush Empire (0844 477 2000) Nov 25. £14 Mark Ronson Hackney Empire, Sep 29 (hackneyempire.co.uk). £20-£25 Salmonella Dub Shepherds Bush Empire, Sep 24-25 (0844 477 2000). £20 Shapeshifter Shepherds Bush Empire, Oct 29 (0844 477 2000). £17.50 Xavier Rudd & Izintaba Shepherds Bush Empire, Dec 6 (0844 477 2000). £18.50

Eamonn J Mccabe, Getty Images

U2 have announced dates for an end-of-year jaunt Down Under. The Irish supergroup will kick off their U2360° tour in Auckland on November 25. The tour then moves to Melbourne on December 1, Brisbane on December 8,

One of Sydney’s best music festivals, Homebake, has been canned this year because organisers could not secure a decent line-up. The event has been put on the backburner until December 2011. Organisers said they had “not been able to have the planets align to a standard we feel appropriate

to the long-standing reputation of Australia’s largest locals-only event”.

The Cat Empire Brixton Academy, Oct 23 (0844 477 2000). £19.50 Fat Freddy’s Drop The Troxy, Sep 9 (0870 264 3333). £27.50 Gorillaz The O2, Nov 14-16 (0844 277 4321). £45 Grinderman Hammersmith Apollo, Oct 1 (0844 844 4748). £25-£27 Guns N’ Roses The O2, Oct 13 (0844 477 5775). £51-£56

Kilimanjaro present

friday 24 ( 7 - 11 pm ) saturday 25 SEPTEMBER ( 9 - 2 am )

LONDON O2 Shepherds Bush Empire

0844 477 2000 kililive.com 0844 871 8803 usual outlets www.salmonelladub.com

OKTOBERFEST Oktoberfest Comes to London every Saturday night from the 4th September!!! • Live German Oompah Band with Oktoberfest drinking Olympics and heaps of free beer

IN LONDON! • All major sporting events shown on a Massive Projector screen and 3 huge plasma screens. • Poker tournaments and Pool table Weekdays, Live Cover Bands every Friday night • FREE shot of German schnapps for everyone who comes dressed in Bavarian outfit

• Augustiner, Hofbrau, Lowenbrau, Paulaner, Spaten and Hacker Pschorr. The only place in the UK that serves all your favorite Oktoberfest Beers • We have a great Beerfest atmosphere just like the beerhalls in Germany • All the traditional Oktoberfest food “Pork Knuckles, Bratwurst, Pretzels” and off course the beer, all imported directly from Germany. • Our Fraulein’s (Beer Maidens) will serve you in Traditional German “Drindl” (dresses) and Steins will be overflowing with ice cold German Beer.

“

THE MOST AUTHENTIC OKTOBERFEST EXPERIENCE OUTSIDE OF MUNICH

”

Time Out Magazine

BOOK YOUR TABLE EARLY AS SPACES ARE LIMITED! For bookings: email info@octoberfestpub.com OR CALL 02077365293 Come dressed in your best Bavarian outfit and get a free shot of schnapps! *must bring this ad/conditions apply

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MUSIC

GIG GUIDE MUSIC & CLUBS

Alison Grinter PICKS OUT THIS WEEK’S BEST LIVE MUSIC

GIG OF THE WEEK EELS Eels main man, Virginian born Mark ‘E’ Everett’s raw, melodic electro-rock has always veered wildly from themes of pessimism to optimism – hardly surprising given the personal tragedies he’s endured over the years. But the contrast has never been more sharply drawn than on his recent concept trilogy of albums. Hombre Lobo explored desire while End Times mined such cheery themes as death and ageing. His new, third instalment Tomorrow Morning promises to be more upbeat. London audiences can hear it live this week.

» Brixton Academy, 211 Stockwell Road, SW9 9SL

Brixton (0844 477 2000; o2academybrixton.co.uk). Wed, Sep 1. £25

KANO

SETH LAKEMAN

Born Kane Brett Robinson in East Ham, Kano was slated to be the next Dizzee Rascal. But the grime star’s career has remained resolutely under the radar and in 2008 he split “amicably” from indie label 679. His new, self-released LP Method To The Maadness is out today.

In 2004 Devon nu-folky Seth Lakeman distinguished himself as the Jimi Hendrix of fiddlers with his thrilling Mercury Prize-nominated album Kitty Jay. His subsequent LPs have been more sedate but he’s an impressive live performer so expect this outdoor show to be a treat.

» Bush Hall, 310 Uxbridge Road, London, W12 7LJ

Shepherd’s Bush (020 8222 6955; bushhallmusic.co.uk). Wed Sep 1. £15

NEW ARTIST ALERT

» Regent’s Park Open Air Theatre, NW1 4NR Regent’s Park (0844 826 4242; openairtheatre.org). Sun, Sep 5. £25-£32

FESTIVAL WATCH Party in Wales If you want to catch a festival and check out one of Britain’s most underrated cities, head to Cardiff. Now in its fourth year, the SWN Festival specialises in showcasing new music across a range of genres. Cardiff city centre (swnfest.com). Oct 21-23

MNDR

Timothy Saccenti

THE BUZZ SO FAR Look out Lady Gaga, step aside La Roux: there’s

a new ’tronic chick in town and she might just out-cool you both. From Brooklyn, New York is self styled “geek barbie” Amanda Warner. She along with Peter Wade make up digital pop duo MNDR, whose danceable tracks Fade To Black and C.L.U.B. are causing quite a stir. WHAT ELSE? Warner’s silken voice caught the ear of pop mentor Mark Ronson who installed her in his live band. She also features on his new song Bang Bang Bang and upcoming album. THE PLUG At Bestival, Isle of Wight (bestival.net). Sep 12

Harvest at Jimmy’s Festival Scouting for Girls (right) are the new headliners after The Zutons pulled the plug when their bassist Russ suffered a serious knee injury. Suffolk (harvestatjimmys.com). Sep 11-12

others. But Tony Conrad has had to cancel his appearance. Minehead (atpfestival.com). Dec 3-5 End of the Road festival CW Stoneking, Dylan LeBlanc and Voice of the Seven Thunders complete the lineup for this country festival. But psychedlic rockers Dengue Fever have cancelled their appearance due to record company commitments. Former Beta Band frontman Steve Mason is a replacmeent. Larmer Tree Gardens, North Dorset (endoftheroadfestival. com). Sep 10-12

Nightmare Before Christmas The final line-up has been confirmed, with Tindersticks and Throbbing Gristle joining Godspeed You! Black Emperor and Weird Al Yankovic, among

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MUSIC LISTINGS The Demon Barber Roadshow The Leeds five-piece

TUESDAY 31

plays folk with a contemporary twist, accompanied by traditional dancers. Southbank Centre,

MUSIC & CLUBS

Alvarez Kings, John

Indie-rock and pop from the south Yorkshire-based fourpiece. The Monarch, Chalk Farm

Belvedere Rd, SE1 8XX (0844 847 9910/ cc 0871 663 2500). £15, concs £7.50.

Wilko Johnson The Canvey Island guitarist and ex-Dr Feelgood member performs rock and blues. Half Moon, Putney, Lower Richmond Rd, SW15 1EU (020 8780 9383). £10.

Sam Kelly’s Station House

Rd, NW1 8AJ (020 7482 2054). £6.

The Haggis Horns The LeedsBeatroot Rendezvouz

based combo plays funk, jazz, Latin and Afrobeat. The

The London-based outfit plays folk electronica. The

Jazz Cafe, Parkway, NW1 7PG (0870 060 3777). £10.

Old Queen’s Head, Essex Rd, N1 8LN (020 7354 9993). £5.

The Notting Hill outfit play blues. Charlotte St Blues Club, Charlotte St, W1T 4QH (020 7580 0113). £7, mems £5.

Kid Canaveral, Alberteen, Vanessa Haynes Septet

Chief Melodic indieAmericana from the Californian combo. Hoxton Square Bar And Kitchen, Hoxton Sq, N1 6NU (020 7613 0709). £8.

Soulful mainstream jazz and blues singer-songwriter.

Dead Models Indie-pop by the Anstruther and Edinburgh-based combo. Bull

The Hideaway, Stanthorpe Rd, SW16 2ED (020 8835 7070). £12.

And Gate, Kentish Town Rd, NW5 2TJ (020 8826 5000). £6, w/flyer £5.

Spider John Koerner

Peter King Quartet

The US-based musician plays American folk and blues.

Jazz and blues four-piece.

Coventry-based combo. Monto Water Rats, Gray’s Inn Rd, WC1X 8BZ (020 7837 4412). £8, adv £6.

Roundhouse, Chalk Farm Rd, NW1 8EH (0844 482 8008). £12.

Dweeb Energetic rock from the

Jonny Quits The London-based threepiece plays alt rock. Hope And Anchor, Upper St, N1 1RL (020 7354 1312). £6, concs £4.50.

Mallory Knox The Londonbased band plays alt rock. Bull And Gate, Kentish Town Rd, NW5 2TJ (020 8826 5000). £6, w/flyer £5.

TNT’S TOP BOOKING

PUBLIC ENEMY Indigo2, SE10 0DX North Greenwich (0844 277 4321; ticketmaster.co.uk). Nov 14. £22.25-£43.50 The genre-busting pioneers – to whom every rapper since owes a debt – are back with their original line-up.

Terry Reid Folk from the singer-songwriter. Ronnie Scott’s, Frith St, W1D 4HT (020 7439 0747). £20-£37.50.

THURSDAY 2 The Clientele The psychedelic

Nick Tree, My Heroine Folk-rock from the Southern singer-songwriter. The Queen Of Hoxton, Curtain Rd, EC2A 3JX (020 7422 0958). £8, adv £6.

pop four-piece performs from its album, Bonfires On The Heath. The Bloomsbury Theatre, Gordon St, WC1H 0AH (020 7388 8822). £13.50.

Everything Everything

WEDNESDAY 1 Blues Engineers Swing and blues six-piece with a dash of soul. Dover St Restaurant And Bar, Dover St, W1S 4LQ (020 7629 9813). £8, free before 10pm.

High-pitched vocals lead the Manchester-based fourpiece that picks at R’n’B, hiphop, indie, rock, post-punk, electronica and pop. The Barfly, Camden, Chalk Farm Rd, NW1 8AN (0844 847 2424). £10.

The Jim Jones Revue The

Sherman Robertson Electric blues from the US guitarist. Charlotte St Blues Club, Charlotte St, W1T 4QH (020 7580 0113). £10, adv £7.

Xtatic Soul and funk outfit fronted by Vanessa Haynes. Dover St Restaurant And Bar, Dover St, W1S 4LQ (020 7629 9813). £12, free before 10pm.

FRIDAY 3 50 Lions The Australian band plays rhythmic hardcore. The

The Argentine musician plays Latino, rock and pop songs. Troxy, Commercial Rd, E1 0HX (020 7748 2728). £27.

Eels Mark Oliver Everett’s LA-based indie-rock group.

Madame Jo Jo’s, Brewer St, W1F 0SE (020 7734 3040). £10.

Minus The Bear The Seattle-based band plays an experimental indie rock and funk collision.

Brixton Academy, Stockwell Rd, SW9 9SL (0844 477 2000). £25.

The Scala, Pentonville Rd, N1 9NL (020 7833 2022/ cc 0870 060 0100). £10.

Freelance Whales The

Mountain Man The

New York-based five-piece plays experimental pop.

Vermont-based trio plays Americana, country and folk. St-Giles-In-The-Fields,

Monto Water Rats, Gray’s Inn Rd, WC1X 8BZ (020 7837 4412). £8.

Kano Hip-hop and grime from the London-based rapper. Bush Hall, Uxbridge Rd,

St. Giles High St, WC2H 8LG (020 7240 2532/ cc 020 7403 3331). £10.

Ark John Jowitt’s prog rock collective is joined by American Presto Ballet, performing songs from their album, Wild Untamed Imaginings. The Luminaire, Kilburn High Rd, NW6 7JR (020 7372 7123). £12.50.

Paint It Black Hardcore punk quartet from Philadelphia, USA. Relentless Garage, Highbury

singer-songwriter. The Troubadour,

Marmaduke Dando Contemporary alt folk from the London-based singersongwriter. Hoxton Hall, Hoxton

The Trojans The band blends

TooT ’N’ Skamen Skapunk collective. The Standard

ska and reggae with R’n’B, world and Celtic music. Dirty South, Lee High Rd, SE13 5PR (020 8852 1267). £10, adv £8.

SATURDAY 4 Gilad Atzmon & The Orient House Ensemble The

vocalist performs bebop, scat and ballads. 1 Lombard St Restaurant, Lombard St, EC3V 9AA (020 7929 6611). £15.

SUNDAY 5 The Imagined Village Simon Emmerson’s modern folk collective featuring Martin and Eliza Carthy. Southbank Centre, Belvedere Rd, SE1 8XX (0844 847 9910/ cc 0871 663 2500). £20-£22.50.

Cafe Oto, Ashwin St, E8 3DL (020 7923 1231). £12, adv £10.

Seth Lakeman The West

Jessie Buckley The Irish singer performs easy listening tunes. Rosemary Branch Theatre, Shepperton Rd, N1 3DT (020 7704 6665). £17.50.

Belvedere Rd, SE1 8XX (0844 847 9910/ cc 0871 663 2500). £17.50.

Country folk musician performs songs from his album, Poor Man’s Heaven. The Open Air Theatre, Inner Circle, Regent’s Park, NW1 4NU (0844 826 4242). £25 & £32.50.

Macka B, Aisaha, Dub Judea, Jah Youth Sound The musician plays optimistic reggae interspersed with social commentary. Dingwalls, Camden Lock, Chalk Farm Rd, NW1 8AB (020 7428 0010/ cc 020 7428 5929). £15, adv £10.

Moscow Drug Club CabaretGirls Alouder The outfit performs covers by girl groups and female The X Factor stars. The Venue, Clifton Rise, SE14 6JP (0208 692 4077). £12.

Dead Cassette, De Shamonix, The Naked Lights Indie-rock four-piece.

from the American guitar and vocal duo. Pizza Express Jazz Club,

Submit your free listing at least three weeks prior to the publication by emailing gigs@pressassociation.com.

Music Venue, Blackhorse Ln, E17 6DS (020 8503 2523). £9.

folk, avant-garde and country performer and songwriter.

Jeff Golub And Mindi Abair Contemporary jazz

The Enterprise, Haverstock Hill, NW3 2BL (020 7485 2659). £5, £3 before 8.30pm.

The Provocateers, Casino, Open To Fire Comedy folk-pop

Anita Wardell Trio Jazz

St, N1 6SH (020 8985 2424). £10.

Robert Plant The rock

Women Leftfield alt rock

tntmagazine.com

Hope And Anchor, Upper St, N1 1RL (020 7354 1312). £6, concs £5.

1972 album by Jim Moray, Sam Sweeney, Saul Rose, Sam Carter, Jon Fuller, Dave Burbidge and Jackie Oates. Southbank Centre,

Putney, Lower Richmond Rd, SW15 1EU (020 8780 9383). £10.

Cargo, Rivington St, EC2A 3AY (020 7739 3440). £7.50.

by the London-based combo.

Manette St, W1D 4JB (0870 060 3777/ cc 0871 231 0842). £8.

100 Club, Oxford St, W1D 1LL (020 7636 0933). £12, adv £10.

rock singer-songwriter with a sense of humour. Half Moon,

from the Canadian combo.

Touchstone The London-based five-piece plays progressive rock. The Borderline, Orange Yard,

A Celebration Of Morris On A performance of the

Old Brompton Rd, SW5 9JA (020 7370 1434). £8, £7 before 10pm.

Highgate Rd, NW5 1JY (020 7344 0044). £45-£50.

W1D 4HT (020 7439 0747). £20-£37.50.

South-east London-based punk, rock and blues trio.

EC2A 3AY (020 7739 3440). £10.

Charing Cross Arches, Villiers St, WC2N 6NG (020 7930 2020). £12.50.

piece plays folk-rock. The Borderline, Orange Yard, Manette St, W1D 4JB (0870 060 3777/ cc 0871 231 0842). £10.

Bermondsey Joyriders

John Otway Eccentric

Stars The Canadian five-piece plays electro-pop. Heaven,

Lost Soul Band The five-

singer-songwriter performs songs from her album, Born Again. Ronnie Scott’s, Frith St,

Kath Bloom Connecticut-born

Neon Indian The US-based

luminary and Grammy Award-winner promotes his 10th solo album, Band Of Joy. HMV Forum,

Mica Paris The jazz and soul

SW10 0QD (020 7352 5953). £12.

Fiona Culley Alt pop from the

Rd, NW5 2TJ (020 8826 5000). £10.

Club, Dalston Culture House, Gillett St, N16 8JH (020 7254 4097). £12.

Dover St Restaurant And Bar, Dover St, W1S 4LQ (020 7629 9813). £15, free before 10pm.

band plays pop-tinted electronica. Cargo, Rivington St,

Pete & The Pirates The Reading-based quintet plays alt rock. Bull And Gate, Kentish Town

Tab Centre, Godfrey Place, E2 7NT (020 7739 3076). £10, adv £8.

Funk and soul covers band.

W12 7LJ (020 8222 6955). £15.

Corner, N5 1RD (0870 060 3777/ cc 0844 847 1678). £10.

multi-instrumentalist from Nottingham. The Vortex Jazz

Andy & The Big Funk

retro quintet plays rock ’n’ roll.

Andres Calamaro

Tony Kofi Quartet Jazz Onda Vaga Latin folk from the Argentinian six-piece. The

renowned saxophonist fronts the jazz outfit featuring bassists Yaron Stavi and Oli Hayhurst, pianist Frank Harrison and drummer Eddie Hick. 606 Club, Lots Rd,

Underworld, Camden High St, NW1 0NE (020 7482 1932). £8.50.

The Hideaway, Stanthorpe Rd, SW16 2ED (020 8835 7070). £12.

Dean St, W1D 3RW (020 7437 9595/ cc 0845 602 7017). £25.

The Leo Green Experience The flamboyant saxophonist and his group plays swing, blues and soul. Dover St Restaurant And Bar, Dover St, W1S 4LQ (020 7629 9813). £15, free before 10pm.

style acoustica and Gypsy swing from the four-piece. Le QuecumBar, Battersea High St, SW11 3HX (020 7787 2227). £12.

The Toasters New Yorkbased ska outfit. The Borderline, Orange Yard, Manette St, W1D 4JB (0870 060 3777/ cc 0871 231 0842). £11.

TNT online For full listings info go to tntmagazine. com/whats_on

CLUBBING

MUSIC & CLUBS

CLUB GUIDE

Natasha Vuckovic PICKS OUT THIS WEEK’S BEST CLUB NIGHTS

CLUB OF THE WEEK CHEW THE FAT! 13TH BIRTHDAY PARTY Yolanda Be Cool – Samuel L Jackson said it during a certain coffee shop scene in Pulp Fiction. It’s also the name of Aussie duo Sylvester Martinez and Johnson Peterson, who’ve been storming the charts worldwide with insanely catchy track We No Speak Americano. Sampling a 1956 hit called Tu vuo fa l’americano, it’s easily the unofficial track of summer 2010. The lads are confirmed for an exclusive London appearance as Chew The Fat! turns 13.

» Cable, Bermondsey St Tunnel, SE1 3JW

London Bridge (020 7403 7730; cable-london.com). Sat, Sep 4, 11pm-6am. £13

beats/breaks

funk/soul

drum ’n’ bass

electro

hip-hop

LIAISON

TAPE

Love house? Then you’ll love Liaison with Rob Marmot headlining this fab little club night at glam Pacha. An Ibiza regular, Rob keeps good company on the White Isle as a resident for Pete Tong’s Wonderland and Erick Morillo’s Subliminal parties. Check him out as he mixes up a storm in the main room.

If your motto is “school night, schmool night” then this one’s for you. TAPE offers up deep house electronica into the wee hours of Monday morning for those with a can’t stop, won’t stop mentality when it comes to dance. It’s guest list-only; email base@ifidotamusic.co.uk.

» Pacha, Terminus Pl, SW1V 1JR Victoria (0845 371 4489; pachalondon.com). Sat, Sep 4, 10pm-5am. £20, £15 adv

» Platinum, EC2A 4JU Old Street (020 7638 4601; platinumbar.co.uk). Sun, 10pm-5am. Free before 11pm, £5 after

We have a pair of tickets to Chew The Fat! to give away, as well as a VIP table and bottle of bubbly for one winner plus four friends to Liaison up for grabs. To enter, email grabs@tntmagazine with ‘Chew the Fat’ or ‘Liaison’ in the subject line by noon, Wed, Sep 1.

tntmagazine.com

techno

Fatboy Slim has opened his own store – online that is. You can now buy four official Fatboy t-shirts from his website as well as a smiley face USB, which comes with a recording of his entire set at SW4 last week. Tough times, Norm? Good news for Italio disco duo Retro/Grade. After support from names like Pete Tong, they’ve been announced as the support act for Groove Armada’s upcoming Black Light tour. Check out their disco-infused single, MODA. The GA tour kicks off in Leeds on October 7 and ends with a London date on October 16 at Brixton Academy.

OWD N EAVE CITY CR H @ CAPA NDAY Y MO M MIXED R FTER. E B V E & RN AD, £8 A IL 6A £2.90 E T C M N DA 11P THIS NKS USE, WITH T DRI E ) MOS MS OF HO IDNIGHT ERVIC OR PAYSLIP T!! ND S O IGH M (W/ID N O ID) A S 4 L H R R L B IT E 4 Y ORK TS (W TRY A ENTR UDEN DUSTRY W T FREE EN FREE LL ST E N I

rock/metal

CLUB NEWS

EN. HEAV St. WC2. nt s r e li il nkme V mba E : e Tub

house/garage

Is nothing sacred any more? Faithless’s (pictured) partnership with car manufacturer Fiat has the video for their new track Feeling Good also serving as a TV ad for the new Punto Evo.

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Getty Images

WIN

hard house/trance

CLUB LISTINGS TUESDAY 31 Festa Fiesta Latin and samba Havana, Fulham Rd, SW6 5NH (020 7381 5005). 7pm-2am. £6.

Forca Brasil DJ Fred spins salsa, samba and Latin tunes, plus live bands. Salsa!, Charing Cross Rd, WC2H 0JG (020 7379 3277). 7.30pm-late. £4, free before 9pm.

Get Ready To Rumba!! Resident DJs spin chart, R’n’B, funky house and garage. Rumba, Shaftesbury Ave, W1D 7EP (020 7287 2715). 10pm-3am. £4.

Lost In London Party on the ground floor, electro-house in the basement and commercial R’n’B in the VIP room. Zoo Bar, Bear St, WC2H 7AQ (020 7839 4188). 7.30pm-3am. £7, guestlist/NUS £5.

Panic! Max, Gaz and That Perfect Fumble play indie and post-punk. The Roxy, Rathbone Pl, W1T 1HJ (020 7255 1098). 10pm-3am. £5, NUS/w/flyer £3.

THURSDAY 2

Orleans, Seven Sisters Rd, N4 2HZ (020 7281 0611). 10.30pmlate. £4.99, £2.99 before 12.30am.

G-A-Y Porn Idol The residents

bachata and reggaeton. Salsa!, Charing Cross Rd, WC2H 0JG (020 7379 3277). 7.30pm-late. £4, free before 9pm.

Psyrhythmix DJs spin

Greek St, W1D 4DR (020 7287 372). 9pm-3.30am. £6, NUS £5, w/flyer £4.

Roller Disco Funk and disco for a wheeled audience. Renaissance Rooms, Arches, Miles St, SW8 1RZ (0844 736 5375). 8pm-midnight. £10, w/skates £7.50, NUS £5.

Brixton Rd, SW9 8HH (020 7326 4455). 10pm-5am. £7, adv/NUS £5.

Funky Business R’n’B, hip-hop, soul, disco, funk, reggae and soulful and funky house. Charlie Wright’s International Bar, Pitfield St, N1 6EN (020 7490 8345). 10pm-4am. £8, £5 before midnight.

Get Yourself Connected Nick Tcherniak spins house and electro. The Langley, Langley St, WC2H 9JA (020 7836 5005). 8pm-3am. £10, £5 before 9pm, free before 8pm.

The Good Foot Snowboy and Healer Selecta play funk, soul and R’n’B. Madame Jo Jo’s, Brewer St, W1F 0SE (020 7734 3040). 10pm-3am. £8.

The Macbeth, Hoxton St, N1 6LP (020 7749 0600). 8pm-2am. £5.

Harding, Sean Hewson, Charlie Bird, Hobbyboy and Boxheads play Latin, house and techno.

Batmacumba DJ Cliffy and DJ

Gramaphone, Commercial St, E1 6LT (020 7377 9337). 9pm4am. £10, concs £8, adv £6.

Mario play Brazilian beats, plus Maracatu Estrela Do Norte perform live. Notting Hill Arts Club, Notting Hill Gate, W11 3JQ (020 7460 4459). 8pm-2am. £8, £6 before 11pm.

house and funk. Anam, Chapel Market, N1 9EZ (020 7278 1001). 6pm-3am. £5, free before 9pm.

Carpet Burn Jonny Woo, Ma

St, W1F 0SE (020 7734 3040). 9.30pm-3am. £5, free before 11pm.

Club Aloha DJs Marshmellow

I Love Sundays Old school and current urban music from DJs Mr Blue, Starlight Crew, Boogie Box, Ska, Mayhem Crew, Ellegal, D,Bo and MC Big Bad Shaq. Rumba, Shaftesbury

Mike and Dan Hayes play rock and pop. South London

Ave, W1D 7EP (020 7287 2715). 8pm3am. £5, ladies free before 11pm.

Pacific, Kennington Rd, SE11 4LD (020 7820 9189). 7pm-3am. £5, £3 before 10pm, free before 9pm.

Service Industry Night

Belle play glam rock and punk. St Moritz, Wardour St, W1F 8WL (020 7437 0525). 10pm-3.30am. £6, w/flyer/mems £5, free before 11pm.

Feeling Gloomy Leonard

and pop courtesy of resident DJs Joe Egg and Alex Logan.

and Cliff spin melancholy pop and indie. Islington Academy, N1

Submit your free listing at least three weeks prior to the publication by emailing clubs@pressassociation.com.

SUNDAY 5 Groove Sanctuary AfricanLatin, electronica, funk, disco and deep house from DJ Jimbo (Raw Deal), Joey Vieira and guests. Madame Jo Jo’s, Brewer

Blush DJs spin disco, soul,

XXL Wednesdays House The Arches, Southwark St, SE1 1RU (020 7403 9643). 10pm-3am. £3, mems free.

SW10 0TZ (020 7376 5555). 10pm3am. £10, guestlist £5 before 11pm.

Wish Grau, Is Tropical, Kath

Decadence DJs Shuff and

3DN (020 7734 4004). 9pm3am. £5, £3 before 11pm.

Perry play commercial dance and R’n’B. Crazy Larry’s, King’s Rd,

The Dogstar, Coldharbour Ln, SW9 8LQ (020 7733 7515). 7pm4am. £5, free before 10pm.

G, Supa Mann and Xavier Miller play R’n’B, hip-hop and funky house. Tamarai, Drury Ln, WC2B

Overproof DJs Cable, Motive, Tim & Barry and Joe Grime play hip-hop, grime and dubstep.

Unbranded DJs Howie and

Audio Sushi Indie, house and hip-hop from DJ Disastronaut.

Mode PR DJs VG, Shock, Bennie

Dandan and Jamie D Winter spin electro and fidget house. Punk, Soho St, W1D

Lanes, Basement Of Tavistock Hotel, Tavistock Sq, WC1H 9EU (020 7183 1979). 7pm-3am. £5.

& Centro, West Central St, WC1A 1JJ (020 7240 1083). 10pm2.30am. £7, £5 before 11pm.

cheese with resident DJs. Zoo Bar,

Your Mum’s House Scally

Throwback Resident DJs play vintage rock ’n’ roll, soul, swing and pop. Bloomsbury Bowling

SATURDAY 4

Temptation Pop, R’n’B and

5PG (020 7831 9399). 10pm-3am. £15, guestlist £10 before 11.30pm.

Koko, Camden High St, NW1 7JE (0870 432 5527). 9pm-3am. £15.

Wig Out Tommy Turntables, Lady Lloyd and Prince Nelly provide indie, rock, pop, R’n’B and Motown. The Den

Ln, SE11 5QY (020 7793 0903). 9pm4am. £6, NUS £4, £3 before 10.30pm.

Bear St, WC2H 7AQ (020 7839 4188). 10pm-3am. £10, £7 before 10pm, guestlist free before 10pm.

Soundcrash Paul White and the residents spin electro, funk and boogie, with live sets from Dam Funk, Rustie, Tokimonsta, Dimlite and Paper Tiger.

Traffic, Vernon Pl, WC1A 2EP (020 3206 0011). 10pm-3am. £10.

Cross Rd, WC2H 0JG (020 7379 3277). 7pm-2am. £10, £8 before 11pm, £4 before 9pm, £2 before 8pm.

Phantom and DJ Hot Rod play electro. Concrete, Shoreditch

Trannyshack Miss Dusty O,

Getty Images

Rob Aldritt, Guy Williams, Mister Shiver and Tasty Tim supply disco and house anthems. Dex Club,

Mafia DJs spin urban and Latin sounds, including upfront R’n’B, hip-hop, 1980s and 1990s soul, reggaeton and soulful house.

High St, E1 6JJ (020 7729 1888). 6pm-1am. £5, free before 9pm.

N*A*S*I*N SoniX, Brahim

Madame Jo Jo’s, Brewer St, W1F 0SE (020 7734 3040). 10pm-3am. £5, w/flyer £3.

Disco Motel Residents Fat Tony,

Strictly Business The Muzik

Butcher, Princess Julia and John Sizzle play pop, dance, house and Italo disco. Eagle, Kennington

Spacecraft Kurtz,

Tasty Tim and Lady Lloyd spin commercial dance and pop.

St, SE1 2EG (020 7403 7730). 10pm-5am. £12, adv/NUS £8.

Latin Fever Latin tracks from resident DJ Jorge. Salsa!, Charing

Rd, W2 6ET (020 7727 9950). 9pm-late. £10, £5 before 11pm.

Borderline, Orange Yard, Manette St, W1D 4JB (0870 060 3777/ cc 0871 231 0842). 11pm-3am. £5, w/flyer £4, NUS £3, mems £2.

1EJ (020 7831 1677). 10pm-3am. £15.

Danny Howells plays house and techno. Cable, Bermondsey

hop, electro and disco courtesy of DJ Downfall. Moonlighting,

and Punk Gareth play punk, rock, metal and ska. The

Calentito Pop, R’n’B, and soul. Salvador And Amanda,

Credit Crunch Thursdays

414, Coldharbour Ln, SW9 8LF (020 7924 9322). 11pm-6am. £5, £3 before midnight.

Zay London, Lonyo and MOBO Award winner and Kiss FM DJ Manny Norte play neo soul, funk and R’n’B. Cherryjam, Porchester

and Marito play zouk, soca, dancehall, R’n’B and all Latin, Caribbean, African and tropical sounds. Volupte, Norwich St, EC4A

The Social, Little Portland St, W1W 7JD (020 7636 4992). 6pm-1am. £5, mems £3, free before 9pm.

psychedelic trance. Club

Diff’rent Strokes DJs Phat Cat,

Rumba Caribe DJs Lio, Loco

Dig Deeper Special guest

Victor V and Hitman play reggae, soul and R’n’B.

The Watershed, The Broadway, SW19 1SD (020 8540 0080). 11pm3am. £8, £7 before midnight.

indie, pop, R’n’B and Motown. The Den & Centro, West Central St, WC1A 1JJ (020 7240 1083). 10pm-4am. £8, free before 11pm.

Social Meltdown Ross Allen plays classic funk and soul.

Latin Krazy Salsa, merengue,

Cheapskates Old school hip-

Popstarz Three rooms of

Great Newport St, WC2H 7JA (020 7240 1551). 9pm-3am. £10, guestlist £5, free before 9pm.

WEDNESDAY 1

Havana, Fulham Rd, SW6 5NH (020 7381 5005). 7pm-2am. £6.

FRIDAY 3

Bathhouse, Bishopsgate Churchyard, EC2M 3TJ (020 7920 9207). 7.30pm-late. £25, adv £7.

supply pop and disco. Heaven, Charing Cross Arches, Villiers St, WC2N 6NG (020 7930 2020). 11pm-4am. £7, w/flyer free.

from the resident DJs, plus dance classes before 10pm. Fiesta

Saints & Sinners Daniel Scott plays club classics, while resident DJs play indie and pop in the bar.

W1T 1HJ (020 7255 1098). 5pm3.30am. £9, NUS £5, £4 before 10.30pm, free before 8.30pm.

Brewer St, W1F 0SE (020 7734 3040). 10.30pm-3am. £6, adv £5.

Agita Brasil Latin and samba

Madame Jo Jo’s, Brewer St, W1F 0SE (020 7734 3040). 10pm-3am. £8.

and John play pop, indie, retro and rock. The Roxy, Rathbone Pl,

White Heat DJs Matty, Marcus and Olly play indie, punk, techno and electro. Madame Jo Jo’s,

Lost And Found Keb Darge and Andy Smith play blues, rock and Northern Soul.

Ave, W1D 7EP (020 7287 2715). 9pm-3am. £10, £5 before 11pm.

Rock ’n’ roll cabaret from host Dusty Limits, plus burlesque from Miss Vicky Butterfly. The

Greek St, W1D 3DR (020 7437 1977). 9pm-3am. £3, free before 10pm.

(020 7274 5537). 5pm-12.01am. £10.

R’n’B, reggae, funk, garage and hip-hop. Rumba, Shaftesbury

Boom Boom Club

soulful house and pop. Thirst,

Jamm Presents Paul Gallagher and Jamie Kelly play indie and rock ’n’ roll, plus Proud Mary, The Sterling, Russian Dolls and The Legion perform live. Jamm, Brixton Rd, SW9 6LH

Big Night Out DJs David, Jim

Steve Nocerino play deep house.

Stupid Tuesday Funky and

Greek St, W1D 3DR (020 7437 1977). 5pm-3am. £5, free before 10pm.

Addiction Resident DJs play

The Den & Centro, West Central St, WC1A 1JJ (020 7240 1083). 11pm-7am. £10, ladies £5.

DJs spin reggae. Orleans, Seven Sisters Rd, N4 2HZ (020 7281 0611). 10.30pm-3.30am. £6.

Funky Underground Upfront electro, funky house, dirty house and minimal techno. Thirst,

TURNING POINT FESTIVAL Roundhouse, NW1 8EH Camden Town (0844 482 8008; roundhouse.org.uk). Sep 17-19. From £15 Three days, five stages and 300 artists all under one roof. Check out Professor Green, Toddla T and more at this unique event set up entirely by under-25s.

Replay Diego CK, Anto and

Roots Underground Resident

Professor Green

Centre, Parkfield St, N1 0PS (0844 477 2000). 10.30pm-3.30am. £8, £6 before midnight, NUS £5, adv £4.50.

Latin and samba from the resident DJ, plus salsa dance classes before 10pm. Fiesta Havana, Fulham Rd, SW6 5NH (020 7381 5005). 8pm-2am. £7, concs £5.

SLAGS/Chill-Out Dance anthems and commercial house from Simon Le Vans, Andy Almighty and Sean Sirrs. Royal Vauxhall Tavern, Kennington Ln, SE11 5HY (020 7820 1222). 2pm-midnight. £8.

tntmagazine.com

MUSIC & CLUBS

from the resident DJs, plus salsa classes before 10pm. Fiesta

TNT’S TOP BOOKING

news & sport

NEWS IN REVIEW

The week that was MONDAY

» TUESDAY » WEDNESDAY » THURSDAY » FRIDAY » SATURDAY » SUNDAY quote unquote “And for that I say shame, for that I say shame.” NSW premier Kristina Keneally lambasts her former caucus members, including Karyn Paluzzano and Ian Macdonald, who quit in a storm of corruption allegations, for damaging Labor’s election prospects.

wrap up of last week’s events from australia, new zealand and south africa

AUSTRALIA Terrorism teacher A teacher who asked Year 10 students to pretend they were terrorists planning an attack on “an unsuspecting Australian community” was referred to counselling amid a furore over her “poor judgement”. The assignment given to students at Kalgoorlie-Boulder Community High School in WA, read: “Your goal is to kill the most innocent civilians in order to get your message across.”

Sound thinking Daddy Cool’s Eagle Rock, the opening concert at the Sydney

a look inside: Aaron de Souza does a handstand in a Sydney Gallery in an installation called The Cell, by Australian artist Brook Andrew. The inflatable room, featuring Wiradjuri Aboriginal motifs, was designed to prompt introspection among all the ‘inmates’ who enter the disorientating space.

Opera House in 1973 and former prime minister Paul Keating’s 1992 Redfern Address were a selection of iconic music, speeches and other recorded sounds added to the National Film and Sound Archive’s Sounds of Australia registry. The additions marked annual Sound Day, established in 2007 to identify what constitutes ‘the sounds of Australia’.

Cousins pulls ’em in

Daddy Cool lead singer Ross Wilson

A TV documentary about AFL player Ben Cousins’ battle with drugs was a ratings hit, with more than two million viewers tuning in. The Brownlow medallist

*And finally … FUICen brilliant

tntmagazine.com

stubby bottle under the slogan ‘We’ve toughened the FUIC up’ and watched sales revive. Its billboards attracted widespread comment and complaints that were dismissed by the Advertising Standards Bureau, which said the slogan was risque, but not obscene. Farmers Union bagged three awards for its efforts.

Soldier farewelled More than 700 family and friends farewelled trooper Jason Brown, 29, at his funeral in Sydney after the special forces solider was killed in a clash with insurgents in Afghanistan. He was the 18th Australian soldier to die while serving in the country. Privates Grant Kirby, 35, Tomas Dale, 21, and Lance Corporal Jared MacKinney, 28, had also since been killed.

“Everyone should be so lucky to have a dad like ours.” Aimee Berry gushes over her dad Chris, who was named Victoria’s father of the year. “He’s a lovely old man. Leave him alone, gosh almighty.” Paul Hogan’s eldest son Brett, 51, defends his father who is being probed over alleged tax evasion. “It’s very likely we’re not going to be talking to Ms Gillard.” Independent-minded National Party member Tony Crook is against Gillard’s mining tax.

TNT er h weat rt repo

Avg min Avg max

Adelaide

Brisbane

Darwin

Hobart

Melbourne

Canberra

Perth Sydney

Getty Images, TNT Images

A cheeky marketing campaign designed to get young blokes wired on iced coffee rather than energy drinks cleaned up at the Australian Marketing Institute’s annual awards. The creative minds behind Farmers Union Iced Coffee gave their product a brand overhaul when sales began to dip. They relaunched it in a plastic

claimed in the documentary that his 2007 drug arrest in Perth was payback from WA Police for his non-cooperation concerning underworld identities.

“There’s an expectation that it will be the two dogs barking.” Independent MP Tony Windsor says he will not support a government that intends to rush back to the polls.

Horse-trading starts

NEW SOUTH WALES A rupture in the joint of a water main tore a huge hole in Oatley Road, Sydney, flooding a major intersection and the underground car park of a nearby apartment block. “It was like Bondi Beach comes to Paddington,” resident Dianne Hill said.

Tony Abbott initially refused to release costings of his policies

initially refused to release the costings of his policies, leading Windsor to describe the opening of negotiations as like “starting a race with a bucket of concrete around one foot”. But Abbott later agreed to the independents’ request for Treasury and the Department of Finance to cost the Coalition’s policies, on the proviso that

Labor did not see the material. The MPs also sought promises on a three-year term, changes to political donations and truth in advertising reforms. Labor and the Coalition were also negotiating with the two other independent MPs: Greens MP Adam Bandt, who has said he would support Labor, and Andrew Wilkie.

Four hold Australia’s future

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Bob Katter A whipcracking larrikin from Queensland, he walked away from the National Party in 2001, launched a scathing attack on economic rationalism and lambasted John Howard’s failure to support tobacco farmers. Look up ‘The Force from the North’ on YouTube for his hit re-election campaign.

Tony Windsor A hard-nosed Tamworth farmer and former National Party member. Windsor left the party in 1991 and promptly won a seat in NSW parliament, which he held for 10 years. He switched to the national stage in 2001. Rob Oakeshott A Port Macquarie surfer and triathlete

with a strong social conscience who supports the Emissions Trading Scheme; also a former National Party member. Andrew Wilkie A former young Liberal, who ran for the Greens against John Howard in 2004. He wrested the Tasmanian seat of Denison from Labor at the election. An advocate of Labor’s highspeed internet network, he sought to differentiate himself from the other independents.

VICTORIA Police were investigated over “extreme” racist, homophobic and pornographic emails that circulated throughout the Victoria police force. Of the more than 100 officers involved, some were sacked, some demoted and others fined.

QUEENSLAND The Gold Coast police would be overhauled with a series of measures to improve services in the troubled district ahead of a public inquiry into alleged misconduct. The changes came after a raid on the Surfers Paradise police station earlier this year to investigate claims of links to drug trafficking.

SOUTH AUSTRALIA Adelaide taxi driver Baljeet Singh, 22, admitted to running over teenager, Dung Tran, who fled without paying a $20 fare in 2009, causing his leg to be amputated. Singh was awaiting sentence.

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NEWS & SPORT

■ Labor and the Coalition court independent MPs in bid to form government. ■ Independents to get access to key documents to help them decide. ■ Opening negotiations with the major parties described as starting a race with “concrete around one foot”.

The spotlight has focused on the men who hold the balance of power in the lower house, but who are they?

COAST TO COAST What’s happening across the country

SUMMARY

he independent MPs who will decide whether Labor or the Coalition form the next government would be given access to confidential information that even PM Julia Gillard would not be allowed to see. With Labor and Coalition both short of a parliamentary majority, Bob Katter, Tony Windsor and Rob Oakeshott were being courted by the two major parties and issued a set of demands to both parties. Coalition leader Tony Abbott

AUSTRALIA

NEW ZEALAND

The week that was

news & sport

MONDAY

» TUESDAY » WEDNESDAY » THURSDAY » FRIDAY » SATURDAY » SUNDAY

Vigil for feilding: More than 800 people turned out for a candlelit service in Feilding in response to a number of recent, tragic, unconnected deaths, and to celebrate the town’s strength of spirit. Desmond Winnie, 65, his wife Deborah Honeyfield, 51, and her father Ian Honeyfield, 86, were found last week after an apparent murder-suicide. Their deaths follow last month’s unsolved murder of Feilding farmer Scott Guy, 31, and the deaths of pilot Jessica Neeson, 27, and her student Patricia Smallman, 64, in an air collision near Feilding Aerodrome. Feilding-raised soldier Tim O’Donnell, 28, was also killed in Afghanistan in August.

Kiwis can go to Brazil Young New Zealanders can spend a year working in Brazil under a new working holiday scheme. The agreement will allow 300 people to work, study and travel in Brazil and the same number of Brazilians to work in

Christ the Redeemer

Prisoners who escaped custody in the year to June.

Percentage of state sector board and committee positions held by women during the past six years.

82m New Zealand. It is open to people aged 18 to 30.

Hijacker jailed A Somali woman was jailed for nine years for New Zealand’s only aircraft hijacking. Asha Ali Abdille, 36, a Somalian refugee, will not be considered for parole until she has served six years. She has already been in custody for twoand-a-half years since her arrest at Christchurch Airport after the hijacking on February 8, 2008. The captain, first officer, and a passenger were all cut during the violent incident on a flight from Blenheim to Christchurch. Wounding and injuring

spotted the deer about one kilometre from shore. “We couldn’t believe it, we thought it was a pile of sticks,” he said. “It was a good swimmer. It was making good speed.” The deer was exhausted when it reached land and took about five minutes to recover before heading into the bush, McCabe said.

charges against Abdille were dropped after she pleaded guilty to the hijacking charge.

Medal thief locked up A career criminal was jailed for six years for stealing priceless war medals from the Waiouru Army Museum. James Joseph Kapa and his accomplice, Ronald van Wakeren, stole 96 medals, including the Victoria Cross and bar of Charles Upham, the only combat soldier in the world to have been awarded two Victoria Cross medals for bravery. Van Wakeren is serving an 11-year term for his part in the burglary.

Profit, in dollars, reported by Air New Zealand for the year to the end of June, which constitutes a four-fold increase in profitability.

Percentage of people who want the government to invest in public transport and alternative fuels, according to a poll by environmental organisation WWF.

10K

Reward offered by an anonymous donor and animal rights group Paw to catch those behind the brutal killings of 12 heavily pregnant ewes on a south Canterbury farm.

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Wellington

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Swine flu deaths recorded so far this year in New Zealand.

*And finally … Poor deer’s a bit wet Wellington doctor Hugh McCabe has seen dolphins and killer whales swimming in the Marlborough Sounds, but he never expected to see a stag treading water. The Marlborough Express reported that recreational angler McCabe was on a boat heading towards Waikawa Marina in the Queen Charlotte Sound when he

WEEK IN NUMBERS

SOUTH AFRICA

The week that was

news & sport

MONDAY

» TUESDAY » WEDNESDAY » THURSDAY » FRIDAY » SATURDAY » SUNDAY

Soldiers may strike Soldiers who were covering for staff shortages during the widespread ongoing public sector strikes threatened to strike themselves unless the wage disute was finally settled. “There’s a possibility that we might be seen as scab labour,” said SA National Defence Union spokesman Jeff Dubazana, who was considering picket lines. The 16 per cent salary rise demanded by public servants was reasonable, he said. Meanwhile, the police force was granted an urgent court injunction to stop officers from taking part in the strikes.

Baboons cause drama Cape Town officials vowed to seek a court order to force conservation authorities to take responsibility for menacing baboons on the peninsula. The city, which paid for 60 people to monitor uban areas where the animals were known to trash homes and intimidate residents, wanted South Africa National Parks to contribute.

1.4bn SNAPPED: Witnesses try to capture photos of the demolition of the iconic Athlone cooling towers in Johannesburg. The disused power station towers, known as the ‘the two ladies of Athlone’, were reduced to rubble in just eight seconds, clearing the site for future development.

Zulu sentenced Durban businessman Prince Sifiso Zulu was sentenced to three years for culpable homicide and negligent driving at Durban Regional Court. In March 2008, Zulu ran a red traffic light and hit a mini van, killing two people and injuring 10 others. He offered to pay compensation to his victims.

A South African brandy won over expert palates at the 2010 International Wine and Spirits competition in London. Laborie Alambic Brandy which was made in extremely limited

quantities by KWV distillers from grapes grown on the Paarl wine estate in Laborie, was deemed the world’s best brandy. Master distiller Kobus Gelderblom was “thrilled”.

Support for rhinos The national parks authority, the government and private game reserves planned to band together to fight rhino poaching under the banner of ‘Mission Rhino’. More than 180 rhinos have been poached for their horns since 2007, which was “unacceptable”, chairman Micheal Swart said.

The street value, in rand, of cocaine seized in a container at Ngqura harbour in Port Elizabeth. The coke, weighing 250kg, was found hidden in supporting pillars.

Years former Durbanville attorney Charles Miskey will spend in jail after he was found guilty of multiple fraud and theft charges.

500k

People in Gauteng who had been tested for HIV in the past five months after the government launched a campaign for widespread testing.

Scrap metal merchants being probed over allegations of price fixing.

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Johannesburg 9

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Cape Town

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East London 15

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Port Elizabeth 13

SAPA, Getty Images

GO THE BOKS: South Africa flags fly at the Springboks v All Blacks Tri-Nations clash at FNB Stadium in Soweto, setting a Guinness world record by fly 90,000 national flags at the same time. The effort was part of the Keep Flying initiative to Xxxx xX xxxxx unity. encourage

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Member nations in BRIC, an informal group of the largest developing nations – Brazil, Russia, India and China – in which South Africa is pitching for membership, giving it more clout in global trade and finance.

Brandy takes title

Baboons: troublemakers

WEEK IN NUMBERS

China ties expand

WESTERN CAPE

Bosom buddies: Jacob Zuma and Hu Jintao

Bilateral trade between the countries, which had expanded since full diplomatic relations were established in 1998, totalled US$16bn last year. Zuma hoped the tightened relations would help to achieve a growth rate of at least 7 per cent per year in SA. “We need resources to build more secure and thriving communities,” he said.

In 2009, China overtook the US as South Africa’s biggest trade partner, importing $540m worth of iron ore. SA trade minister Rob Davies parried criticism that the country was being sucked into China’s “neocolonial” aspirations, insisting alternatives were available should relations between the two nations collapse.

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Malema: ANC is out of touch country’s mines, Malema called for a wider generational mix among the ANC’s ageing top brass. A push for the league’s former president Fikile Mbalula to replace ANC secretary-general Gwede Mantashe in the 2012 election was part of this plan. “We are calling for younger, more energetic and radical leaders of the liberation movement to take on serious responsibilities,” he said. “Multi-sexual relationships cannot be fashionable trends amongst youth,” he added, in a veiled swipe at the country’s polygamous President.

Nine children were killed in a collision between a school bus and a train in Cape Town. Witnesses said the driver, who was seriously hurt, drove around a closed boom gate, which police confirmed was down. The children were between eight and 11 years old.

KWAZULUNATAL Dr Busi Nyembezi, the former boss of the provincial health department, was granted bail along with his former colleagues Mdu Ntshangase and Sipho Buthelezi ahead of a fraud and corruption case. They were arrested during raids in which R200m worth of assets were siezed.

FREE STATE The high Court in Bloemfontein closed down more than 100 accounts at First National Bank containing more than R4.7m. The money was believed to be stolen from the Maluti-A-Phofung municipality in Qwaqwa. It followed the arrest of a woman in Soweto who tried to withdraw money from one of the accounts.

GAUTENG

Julius Malema

All pets in Sophiatown, west of Johannesburg would be vaccinated for rabies at no charge after a dog was found with the disease and put down.

tntmagazine.com

NEWS & SPORT

■ President Jacob Zuma visits China in a bid to strengthen relations. ■ China cements status as South Africa’s most lucrative investor. ■ Multiple trade agreements signed between the two countries, including ones on construction and telecoms.

South Africans should be concerned about the government’s tendency to want to please Queen Elizabeth, ANC Youth League President Julius Malema said. “The reason they are going to the Queen is because they believe that such is the way, even with the power that was given to them by the people of South Africa,” Malema told supporters at a highly charged ANCYL national general council, which vociferously undermined the leadership of its mother body, the ANC. Along with autonomy from the ANC and nationalising the

COAST TO COAST What’s happening across the country

SUMMARY

hina has cemented its place as South Africa’s key trading partner after President Jacob Zuma visited the country with a delegation of business people and key ministers. After Zuma’s meeting with the Chinese President, Hu Jintao, the two countries signed more than a dozen agreements relating to investment in railways, power transmission, construction, mining, telecoms, insurance and nuclear power.

SOUTH AFRICA

RUGBY Springbok Juan Smith crosses for a try

We went “ missing when

NEWS & SPORT

it really mattered, particularly set pieces

”

Wallabies coach Robbie Deans bemoans his side’s set-piece meltdown.

THE PLAYER

Victor Matfield

Boks on the board South Africa 44 JP Pietersen J G Steenkamp P Spies Smith F Steyn tries M Steyn 4 B James cons M Steyn 2 F Steyn pens

31 Australia J O’Connor 2 D Mumm W Genia tries M Giteau 4 cons pen

The Wallabies failed again at altitude in South Africa, throwing away a blistering start that saw them score three tries within the opening 10 minutes and four tries to three in the first half. It might have been more with winger Drew Mitchell controversially denied by TMO Shaun Veldsman in just the second minute. If that quietened the Loftus crowd, they were well and truly silenced when Will Genia dummied and scored a minute later and James O’Connor bagged the first of a double after a scintillating 60m run by Kurtley Beale in the fifth minute. At the break, Australia were up 28-24 after

seven five-pointers were scored in an explosive first half few had expected but began imploding after the break with a succession of errors, continually squandering chances with poor handling and line-out work. The Springboks took the lead for the first time in the match when Francois Steyn try a minute after Mumm had spilled a kick-off. The South African full-back then increased his side’s to 37-31 with a 68th-minute penalty goal and a JP Pietersen try a minute from time rubbed salt into Australia’s wounds. The result saw South Africa notch their first win of this year’s Tri-Nations and leaves Australia still without a win in Pretoria after five Tests and without a win on the South African highveld since 1963.

SOUTH AFRICA The veteran Springboks lock played his 100th Test match on his home ground of Loftus Versfeld and now looks to be vying with teammate John Smit to become their country’s most capped player, with both men poised to surpass Percy Montgomery’s 102 Tests.

THE TABLE Team

New Zealand South Africa Australia

W 5 1 1

L 0 4 3

BP PD PTS 3 72 23 2 -45 6 1 -27 5

ON THE BOX SATURDAY 4pm Sky Sports 4 SOUTH AFRICA V AUSTRALIA

Kiwis and Aussies both into semi-finals

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qualified in a far more straightforward manner, dismantling Wales 41-8 to go through to the last four, where they will next face France, unbeaten. “There’s a heap to work on – the girls know that – but there were some great tries,” Kiwi coach Brian Evans said. “Our try-scoring ability is awesome, the players certainly know their way to the try line.”

ON THE BOX WEDNESDAY 5.30pm Sky Sports 3 NEW ZEALAND V FRANCE

WEDNESDAY 8pm Sky Sports 3 ENGLAND V AUSTRALIA

SUNDAY 5pm Sky Sports 3 WORLD CUP FINAL

Trisha Hina

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Australia’s women booked their first ever semi-finals appearance at a World Cup with an emphatic 62-0 victory over South Africa in Guildford on Saturday. The Wallaroos secured their necessary fourtry bonus point within 30 minutes and piled on nine tries to ensure they qualified for the semi-finals as the best performing runner-up across the tournament’s three pools. Centre Sharni Williams scored her second try of the match during the final play of the game, lifting Australia past the 56 points required to knock Canada out of the race and securing a semi-final showdown with England on Wednesday. Defending champions New Zealand

much respect and when we got back we couldn’t close the deal

NEWS & SPORT

We showed “ them too

NRL

ROUND 25

Knights coach Rick Stone after his side pushed the Dragons but ultimately fell short.

”

Ukuma Ta’ai offloads against Brisbane

THE PLAYER

Luke Covell SHARKS The Sharks managed a stirring win over the Titans in Covell’s last home game, and the winger even managed to score a spectacular try after a 45-metre dash to the line. Notoriously short on pace, Covell was unable to break away from tacklers, but managaed to fend off the Titans’ Scott Prince to score.

Warriors run amok Warriors 36 L Brown 2 L Hohaia 2 M Vatuvei S Mannering B Matulino tries J Maloney 4 goals

Rabbitohs 24

Team Dragons Tigers Titans Panthers Warriors Roosters Sea Eagles Raiders Rabbitohs Broncos Knights Eels Bulldogs Sharks Cowboys Storm

P 23 23 23 22 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 23 22 23 23 23

W 16 15 14 13 13 13 12 12 11 11 10 10 8 7 5 13

L 7 8 9 9 10 10 11 10 12 12 13 13 14 16 18 10

PD 205 37 19 112 39 39 41 4 31 -25 -40 -64 -45 -217 -232 96

PTS 36 34 32 30 30 30 28 28 26 26 24 24 20 18 14 0

* Storm unable to earn any points this season as punishment for salary cap breaches

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Bulldogs v Panthers

Round 26 games

Titans v Tigers, Broncos v Raiders, Eels v Warriors, Cowboys v Roosters, Panthers v Sharks, Sea Eagles v Bulldogs, Storm v Knights, Dragons v Rabbitohs

J Yow Yeh try

16 Eels J Horo K Inu F Mateo tries L Burt 2 goals

With both sides needing to win to remain in the hunt for finals, the Rabbitohs drove the final nail into the Eels’ coffin. After a scoreless first half, Souths surged to a 12-0 lead. The Eels fought back and had their chances but fell apart just as an unlikely win appeared possible. Knights 18 B Creagh B Morris J Nightingale J Soward D Young tries J Soward 3 goals

26 Dragons B Creagh B Morris J Nightingale J Soward D Young tries J Soward 3 goals

The Dragons secured the minor premiership after holding off a brave fightback from the Knights. Leading 22-0 just after half-time, the Dragons looked home and hosed, but conceded three tries in seven second-half minutes to let the Knights back into the game. Tigers 26

Monday night game

4 Broncos

The Warriors guaranteed themselves a place in the finals by demolishing the Broncos at Mt Smart Stadium. The game was effectively over in the first half, with the home side running in five unanswered tries to lead 24-0 at the break. Manu Vatuvei ignited the Warriors with

J Lowe D Taylor R Wesser I Luke tries C Sandow 4 goals

THE TABLE

B Marshall 3 R Farah A Fifita tries B Marshall 3 goals

14 Storm R Hoffman W Isa J O’Neill tries C Smith goal

Benji Marshall sent a sold-out Leichhardt Oval into raptures with a hat-trick that included a flick pass and finish which will be part of his highlight reel. The win over the Storm puts the Tigers in the box seat for a top-two finish but they have their share of injury worries.

a try in the 13th minute, when he claimed a Brett Seymour bomb, before Lewis Brown made the most of some abject Broncos defending to score in the 22nd minute and then completed his double four minutes later. Poor goal-kicking from James Maloney – landing one from four conversions – kept the Broncos alive but two tries to Lance Hohaia, either side of the break, shut the gate. Sharks 30 L Covell L Douglas P Gallen N Gardner T Smith tries L Covell 5 goals

16 Titans B Thompson 2 J Atkins tries S Prince 2 goals

The Titans suffered a blow to their top-four hopes with a surprise loss to Cronulla and will be hoping the setback is just a blip on the radar. From the outset, the Sharks were on a mission to win the last home game for retiring veterans Trent Barrett and Luke Covell. Raiders 48 R Robinson 4 J Dugan 2 D Shillington G Buttriss J McCrone tries J Croker 6 goals

4 Cowboys M Bani try

Canberra ensured their chances of playing finals remain in their own hands by posting a thumping win over the hapless Cowboys. Reece Robinson made the most of his late inclusion by crossing four times, while fullback Josh Dugan also enjoyed a day out. Roosters 30 S Kenny-Dowall 3 S Perrett T Carney tries T Carney 5 goals

14 Sea Eagles S Matai M Robertson tries J Lyon 3 goals

A sensational hat-trick to centre Shaun KennyDowall was the highlight of a memorable comeback by the Sydney Roosters, who rallied from 14-0 down late in the first half to score 30 unanswered points and keep their hopes of a home final alive.

tntmagazine.com

ROUND 22

AFL

When “ Collingwood

NEWS & SPORT

had the momentum and the run of play, Buddy kept us in the contest

”

Cyril Rioli wraps up Sharrod Wellingham

Hawks hitting stride Hawks 15.8.98 L Franklin 6 C Rioli 2 C Young B Whitecross C Peterson J Lewis J Roughead R Hooper X Ellis

13.17.95 Magpies D Jolly 2 J Blair 2 L Davis 2 L Ball C Dawes D Beams D Swan H Shaw S Sidebottom T Cloke

Hawthorn confirmed their status as late-season bolters with an impressive come-from-behind victory over the minor premiers. The Hawks had trailed from midway through the second term and, with 16 minutes gone in the last, were 19 points in arrears and looked beaten. Dockers 13.15.93 C Mayne 2 S Hill 2 M Johnson 2 M Pavlich 2 M Walters 2 M De Boer A Morabito H Ballantyne

13.9.87 Blues J Garlett 3 L Henderson 2 J Waite 2 K Simpson 2 D Ellard E Betts H Scotland M Murphy

The Dockers held a 30-point lead late in the third term before Carlton came storming back, but Fremantle hung on in a thrilling final term to snap a three-match losing streak and secure a home final. For Carlton, the loss condemns them to a sudden-death clash in Sydney. Crows 9.11.65 T Walker 3 K Tippett 2 J Porplyzia M Jaensch R Douglas R Sloane

5.7.37 Saints J Geary M Gardiner S Dempster N Dal Santo J Koschitzke

Adelaide scored an upset win over the Saints in a defensive arm-wrestle – although the result is of little consequence, apart from robbing the Saints of valuable momentum going into finals. After an even first half, the Crows pulled away, with their key forwards shading the Saints’. Lions 10.8.68 J Brennan 2 A Proud B Staker J Adcock J Polkinghorne L Power P Hanley T Banfield T Collier

16.10.106 Swans K Jack 3 T Dennis-Lane 3 S Reid A Goodes B Meredith J Bolton J Kennedy J McVeigh L Jetta N Malceski R O’Keefe R Shaw

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Cats 16.16.112 G Ablett 4 C Mooney 3 S Johnson 3 T Hawkins 2 C Ling 2 B Ottens T Varcoe

10.8.68 Eagles C Wilson 3 A Hams 2 L Shuey C Masten J Kennedy K Stevens M LeCras

The Eagles, who were competitive for the first half before five goals in a row from the Cats ensured a routine victory. The highlight for Geelong fans was the form of Gary Ablett, who gathered 33 possessions and booted four goals, suggesting he is cherry-ripe for finals. Bulldogs 17.5.107 J Grant 6 B Hall 4 N Eagleton 3 B Moles 2 D Giansiracusa 2

11.12.78 Bombers H Hocking 2 P Ryder 2 T Colyer 2 B Howlett B Prismall D Hille H Slattery M Marigliani

The Bulldogs tuned up for finals with an easy win over an Essendon outfit that faces a long, unpleasant off-season. The Bombers kicked the first two goals but the Bulldogs dominated therafter, with young forward Jarrad Grant producing a break-out performance. Tigers 16.16.112 J King 3 J Riewoldt 3 M Morton 3 M White 2 T Cotchin 2 A Collins J Post R Nahas

18.14.122 Power D Stewart 4 T Boak 3 P Stewart 2 R Gray 2 T Logan 2 D Brogan D Cassisi J Davenport J Westhoff D Rodan

A ten-goal second quarter saw the Power lead by 59 points just after half-time but, remarkably, Richmond fought back to trail by just three points midway through the final term. Port surged again to run out winners but Richmond could be satisfied with their effort.

THE PLAYER

Ben Cousins TIGERS His tumultuous career is over but Cousins deserves to be remembered as the remarkable player he was. Freakishly driven, even by champions’ standards, Cousins would regularly push himself to point of vomiting onfield. He was one of the greats.

THE LADDER Team Magpies Cats Saints Bulldogs Swans Dockers Hawks Blues Roos Power Crows Demons Lions Bombers Tigers Eagles

P 22 22 22 22 22 22 22 22 21 22 22 21 22 22 22 22

W 17 17 15 14 13 13 12 11 10 10 9 8 7 7 6 4

L 4 5 6 8 9 9 9 11 11 12 13 12 15 15 16 18

D 1 0 1 0 0 0 1 0 0 0 0 1 0 0 0 0

% 142 148 122 125 108 104 111 108 86 82 93 95 82 80 73 77

PTS 70 68 62 56 52 52 50 44 40 40 36 34 28 28 24 16

Sunday night game Demons v Roos

ON THE BOX FRIDAY 10am ESPN CATS V SAINTS

SATURDAY 10.30am ESPN MAGPIES V BULLDOGS

Other week one finals Dockers v Hawks, Swans v Blues

Getty Images

After trailing by one point at half-time, the Swans shook off Brisbane by kicking five unanswered goals in the third quarter. The Swans’ win means they will host Carlton this weekend, rather than travel to Melbourne. Sydney midfielder Kieren Jack was best afield.

But the 2008 premiers rallied with an electric burst of four goals in just seven minutes to hit the front. Collingwood had chances to wrest back the lead but inaccuracy cost them. Hawthorn will take further confidence from the fact star on-baller Luke Hodge was missing through injury, the best-on-ground performance from livewire Cyril Rioli and spearhead Lance Franklin’s season-high six goals.

Hawks coach Alastair Clarkson on star forward Lance Franklin’s habit of kicking important goals.

PREMIER LEAGUE Spurs’ Jermain Defoe received some close attention

THE PLAYER

Andy Carroll

NEWS & SPORT

NEWCASTLE He’s a big unit with lots of hair and there’s already been talk about him as a future England striker. At a club permanently looking for ‘the next Alan Shearer’, the fact he’s a local lad also counts for plenty. He scored a hat-trick when Newcastle routed Villa two weekends ago and scored again on Saturday against Wolverhampton, ensuring the hype will continue to build for a while yet.

IN REVIEW

THE CHAT

Arteta for England? England manager Fabio Capello has met with Everton midfielder Mikel Arteta to persuade the Spaniard to apply for British citizenship, with a view to picking him for England. Arteta has lived in England for at least five years and has never played for Spain, so he’s eligible. In cricket, Poms collect Saffas. In football, apprently it’s Spaniards.

Wigan shock Spurs Last season, Wigan travelled to White Hart Lane and got drilled 9-1 by Tottenham and so far in the new campaign, they had conceeded 10 goals in two matches. How fitting then that, just as Tottenham were starting to puff their chests out and take themselves a bit seriously – Champions League football will do that – they were brought crashing back to Earth by a famous 1-0 Wigan victory. In the 80th minute, Wigan’s Colombian striker Hugo Rodallega fired on goal and Spurs keeper Carlo Cudicini made a meal of it,

ensuring Wigan headed home smiling after a testing start to the season. Elsewhere, Wayne Rooney broke his 1100minute scoring drought as Manchester United romped to a routine 3-0 win over West Ham, who are in dire straits after just three weeks. Rooney’s goal came from a penalty, but when you’re as bereft of form as Roon-Dog has been, you’ll take what you can get. Encouragingly, Blackpool bounced back from their 6-0 hiding the previous week with a wildly fluctuating 2-2 draw with Fulham.

LOOKING AHEAD

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Hodgson continues to build at Anfield When Roy Hodgson took over Liverpool during the off-season, there was some sense that he was on a hiding to nothing. While still undeniably a big club, Liverpool’s financial worries persist, making it tough to build a squad with serious quality. Given the spending might of Manchester City, what chance does Hodgson possibly have of restoring Liverpool to the top four and Champions League status? Hodgson suffered a further setback last week when his Argentinian midfielder Javier Mascherano completed his long-awaited transfer to Barcelona for a reported £21m. But amid all that, Liverpool managed to sign

Raul Meireles

Portuguese midfielder Raul Meireles from FC Porto for £10.7m – a move that suggests Hodgson may just be canny enough to guide Liverpool through this troubled period and at least bring them out the other side in one piece. Hodgson has already brought in Joe Cole and Christian Poulsen, rebuilding a Liverpool midfield that has, in recent times, lacked dynamism. That Hodgson has reacted to his club’s tumultuous circumstances not by twiddling his thumbs but by pursuing his on-field vision even more expansively, indicates that, having made their share of mistakes elsewhere, Liverpool hired the right manager.

AFL Grand Final Saturday, September 25

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GENERAL

NEWS & SPORT

THE QUOTES

“Some of my best work has been on Mad Mondays … I am sure I will sneak in a couple of beers with the boys but the days have gone of me leading the pack.” It’s all over for Ben Cousins and he won’t be winding back the clock. “I came through the tradesman’s exit and thought I’d leave through the tradesman’s exit … I’m not the greatest talent, but the crowd know I’m going to give effort every time.” Outgoing Sydney Swans veteran Brett Kirk. Bless him. “My experience from Test cricket is, as soon as you take your eye off the ball, that rusty gate comes back and hits you in the face.” Aussie cricketer Michael Clarke manages to discuss the challenges ahead without referring to himself in the third-person. “The kid needs to keep his head down … last week he played well, and he turned up with a mohawk haircut that said, ‘Come and get me’.” Wests Tigers coach Tim Sheens on new sensation Andrew Fifita (below).

Australa made a winning start to the basketball world championships in Turkey on the weekend, snatching a last-minute 76-75 victory against Jordan.

Trailing by one point with 32 seconds left in the opening match in Group A, David Andersen hit two free-throws with 13 seconds left before Jordan somehow missed a layup and three attempted tip-ins as time expired and the Boomers narrowly avoided a massive upset. Centre Aleks Maric finished with 23 points and nine rebounds in a commanding performance and fellow big man Andersen added 22 points to carry Australia past the world’s 38th-ranked nation. New Zealand weren’t as fortunate, however, going down 79-92 to Lithuania. Of the two nations, Australia have the far tougher draw, sharing a group with

Australia’s Aleks Maric against Jordan

Germany, Argentina and Serbvia – all nations ranked in the world’s top 10 – as well as Angola and Jordan. There are 24 countries competing in the tournament, divided up into four pools of six, from which the top four progress to the knock-out stage, which begins next week.

WHAT CHANCE A MEDAL? Neither Australia nor New Zealand have ever won a medal at the basketball world championships, although the Kiwis finished a creditable fourth back in 2002. Currently, Australia are ranked 11th in the world and New Zealand 13th.

Federer looms large for Hewitt After sneaking into the seedings at the US Open – the year’s fourth and final Grand Slam tournament, which begins this week – Lleyton Hewitt might have thought his luck had turned, that a kind draw might, for once, be in the offing. Instead, Hewitt finds himself drawn to meet Roger Federer in the third round. Hewitt may derive some confidence from the fact he beat Federer the last time they played, in Halle in June. On the other hand, that win came after 15 straight losses for Hewitt against Federer, a streak dating back nearly

seven years. Should Hewitt survive to meet Federer, it will be the third time in five majors the two have met. On the women’s side, Samantha Stosur will need to build momentum quickly in the early rounds after an injury-interrupted lead-in. Stosur, ranked sixth in the world and seeded fifth in New York, could meet Elena Dementieva in the fourth round, Kim Clijsters in the quarter-finals and Venus Williams in the semis.

ON THE BOX EVERY DAY 4pm Sky Sports 2 US OPEN

Lleyton Hewitt

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Aussies pip Jordan

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B M E E R T P SE Wit

s ramp l a n i f L F h t he A

ing up this weekend, we run an eye ov e r t he

MAGPIES Overview: Arguably better than the sides that played in the 2001 and 2002 deciders, this Collingwood outfit has played committed, dynamic footy in the second half of the season. The Magpie faithful can sense a first flag since 1990. The star: Dane Swan – an unlikely star, perhaps, but he finds a heap of footy, has a defensive side and can also bob up to kick goals. Could well win a Brownlow Medal by the end of the month. Prediction: Runners-up.

Captain crucial: Nick Riewoldt has to fire for the Saints

CATS Overview: They’ve won two flags already and a third in four years would put them alongside the great Brisbane sides of 2001-04. Their defence is ageing,

and the key forwards are inconsistent, but the midfield remains the best around. The star: Gary Ablett – who else? All season, the talk has been about whether he’ll leave Geelong for the Gold Coast but his footy hasn’t suffered at all. Watch the little champ go up a notch during finals. Prediction: Premiers.

SAINTS Overview: Three wins from their past seven games is an unconvincing form-line and the Saints appear to have the staggers at the worst possible time. The Cats first-up is a tough ask and inform Hawthorn loom the week after. The star: Nick Riewoldt – a hamstring injury cruelled his season but the Saints skipper and centre half-forward has

e ig h t s i

de s s t i l l i n

NEWS & SPORT

ACTION the hunt for the flag WORDS TOM STURROCK

returned in time to have an impact. Needs to fire if the Saints are to challenge. Prediction: Eliminated second week.

BULLDOGS Overview: The Dogs haven’t beaten any of the three teams above them this season and Geelong belted them by 101 points in Round 20. They’re still capable of an upset, but the top two seem to have them covered for both form and personnel. The star: Barry Hall – the Bulldogs had long been undone by their lack of a key forward and Hall – surely the recruit of the year – has plugged that gap. Will need to kick a few bags for the Dogs to go deep. Prediction: Eliminated third week.

Geelong’s “ midfield remains the best around ”

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SWANS Overview: Contested, committed footy has been the Swans’ trademark in recent times and, with Paul Roos in his final year as senior coach, it would be fitting if his side could summon one last victory against a more fancied pretender. The star: Adam Goodes – has booted more goals this season than in any other and remains the main man in a side short on established goal-kickers. Can also provide a spark further up the ground. Prediction: Eliminated second week. DOCKERS Overview: The year’s surprise packet won eight of their first ten games but an inconsistent second half of the year leaves them searching for momentum. They secured a home final but would have preferred to play Carlton, not Hawthorn. The star: Matthew Pavlich – Fremantle’s leading goal-kicker for the seventh year, the skipper has been consistent rather than devastating. No longer the sole

Clash of the titans: Gary Ablett and Chris Judd are big-game players

contributor, but still the key. Prediction: Eliminated first week.

HAWKS Overview: Of the sides in the bottom half of the eight, the Hawks are best-placed to shock. They went all the way in 2008 so know what’s required and still have enough match-winners to cause a big upset if they click. The star: Luke Hodge – just as capable dropping back to marshall the defence as he is delivering the ball to forwards with his raking left foot. The man most likely to get the Hawks going. Prediction: Eliminated third week. BLUES Overview: They’ve had some bright spots this season – and probably exceeded expectations given the preseason loss of Brendan Fevola – but don’t have the spread of contributors across the ground to trouble the heavyweights. The star: Chris Judd – even with a young midfield around him, Judd remains the league’s premier clearance player. Has an outstanding finals record and must shine for the Blues to surprise. Prediction: Eliminated first week.

» Get along to TNT’s official grand final screening at the Elk Bar, 587-591 Fulham Road on September 25.

Unlikely star: Magpie Dane Swan is widely tipped to win a Brownlow

CAREERS & MONEY 50

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CAREERS CAREERS & MONEY

company and got a job within two weeks working on Chancery Lane. They have also helped me secure a new position in learning and development that I start next week. What do you do day-to-day?

ON THE JOB HOLLY FINLAYSON Career Operations support at management consultancy firm The Berkeley Partnership Age 25 Lives Putney From Wellington, New Zealand How did you get into your line of work?

After travelling around Europe and living in Scotland, I moved to London. After stuggling to get a job, I registered with a recruitment

My current role is very varied. It does, however, include a lot of online shopping, organising gifts, diary management, organising client workshops. But most importantly, I get to organise parties and events and trial good restaurants in London, What’s the best thing about your job?

The bacon sandwiches that I get delivered to the office for functions and events! What’s the most challenging thing about your job?

Coming back from a threehour boozy lunch with partners from the firm and trying to do work and not be too ‘perky’ for the rest of the afternoon – all the while thinking: ‘I’m beached as, bro’.

OFFICE GURU Samantha Baden

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TACKLES YOUR CAREER DRAMAS

There’s a lack of career progression in my current role, what shall I do? Career progression is important because it keeps us interested in our jobs. Hays’ Catherine Goosem says approach your manager and discuss the skills you wish to further develop. Bring it up during a review meeting or

an appraisal. Remember it’s important to provide key reasons for why further development can benefit both you and your employer on a long-term basis. If you are unable to solve the problem at your company then it may be time to look for your next role. But do ask about career development.

Unpaid hours increase A

s companies gradually battle back from recession, white-collar employees may find themselves being squeezed to put in extra hours without being paid. According to Phil Flaxton, chief executive officer of Work Wise UK, people in finance jobs in London or other professional roles may find that it is not unheard of for them to put in 50 hours a week at work. He added that it is “well documented” that many are now working longer

than they did prior to the recession, in many cases this is without pay. “With the cost of redundancy being as expensive as it is in many cases, I’m sure there are unscrupulous employers out there that would put undue and unlawful pressure on staff,” he warned.

JOB CUTS IN NZ

AUSSIES RIDE AGAIN

Public servants in New Zealand have been warned more job cuts are on the way. Finance Minister Bill English said the government would tighten its belt until the surplus was more than two per cent of GDP.

Australian financial services professionals are once again looking for jobs overseas, according to a new report from Marks Sattin. London remains the destination of choice, but Hong Kong and Singapore are catching up quickly.

tntjobs.co.uk Sign up for job alerts and get more career advice at tntjobs.co.uk

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A GOOD EARN A basic annual salary for a fitness instructor is £12,000-£15,000; a lifeguard £11,000-£13,500; a receptionist £12,000£14,000; and in membership sales a retainer of £13,000-£15,000 can grow to £22,000-£25,000 with commission. A fitness manager rates a bit higher on the pay scale with £18,000-£20,000, but you’ll get more coin as a club manager at a premium chain with a salary of £30,000-£35,000. As a personal trainer, you’re looking at charging roughly £45 per session and paying rent to a gym of about £150 per week.

Membership sales and receptionist roles are achievable on personality and competency alone, then with the relevant qualifications and experience, positions such as personal trainers, group fitness instructors, fitness managers, lifeguards and operations managers are all there for the taking.

FORGET NINE-TO-FIVE “Most gyms are happy to take people on for a six-to-nine-month stint but there are full time positions available, where you are looking at a 40-hour week with shifts,” says Peacock. Expect hours like 6.30am-2.30pm, 10am6pm and 2.30-10.30pm across most job descriptions. Salespeople are looking at a slightly longer slog of 10am-8pm. EASY PEASY Qualifications from home, such as a level 2 certificate in fitness instructing, or proof of lifeguard training if you want to work as a pool attendant, are highly regarded here, so finding work should be a doddle. Sign up to the Register of Exercise Professionals (exerciseregister.org) and you’re good to go.

TNT Images, Getty Images

TRAINING IN THE UK If your fitness experience is limited to the the odd workout, there are a host of courses available to get qualified in the UK, however the training is considered substandard to that back home.

A good reception: it’s not hard to find work in the industry

Water way to work: lifeguards are in demand

“There are people who think working in a gym is an easy job,” says DuPreez, “but it’s never easy – it’s people’s lives, confidence and self-esteem and there are babies who train in our pool. That’s a lot of responsibility.”

MYSTERY SHOPPER Peacock recommends doing a “mystery shop” of a gym before attending an interview. “Go in as you would if you were looking to sign up as a member and scope out the set up, see how the gym is sold to you and what the benefits are.” While it’s not the usual gym get-up, wearing a suit to your interview will give you an edge over the others, Peacock adds. “I also look for a great personality,” she says. WHERE TO LOOK The best way to find work is to knock on gym doors – the chains, the community sports centres, hotel gyms and even corporate gyms. Otherwise, there are more than 2000 jobs posted on leisurejobs.com.

Core blimey! Work as a trainer to put some muscle into your wallet

tntonline Sign up for job alerts and get more career advice at tntjobs.co.uk

LET’S GET PERSONAL PULLING HER WEIGHT Emma Matthews, 26, from Brisbane is a personal trainer, group fitness instructor and also puts some hours in behind the counter at Fitness First Shepherd’s Bush. What does your week entail? I deliver PT sessions for new members and teach about eight classes each week, earning £25-£30 for each. How did you set yourself up? My Australian qualifications were recognised, but I needed to be REPS qualified and also pay public liability

insurance. Also, every three months I have to pay Les Mills, the fitness company, £17 for their new music CD. How is the work here compared to home? The PT is all indoors, which can be challenging, and I find the UK a bit behind with their fitness training. What do you like about the job? You get paid to keep fit and get to meet so many people. However, as a PT you are basically on demand seven days a week, so you can put in long hours.

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CAREERS & MONEY

MONEY

WHERE DOES YOUR DOSH GO?

BRENT CONNELL

New cheap flight formula apanese economists have created a formula to help decide whether it is cheaper to book flights in advance or wait until the last minute. According to the experts, mathematical formula ∏A =gUG + min(k - g, (1 - g)(1 r)), where ∏ apparently equals profit, proves that savvy

EASY MONEY Laura Adcock MAKES YOUR CASH GO FURTHER

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approaches.” Booking more than eight weeks in advance may mean your plans change, and any later and there’s an increased risk in flights becoming more expensive or selling out. Business travellers tend to book first thing, which accounts for prices falling in the afternoon.

CREDIT IN COMEBACK

BARCLAYS CRASHES

Many banks are offering credit more cheaply than before the recession, which could leave borrowers heavily in debt when interest-free periods end. The relaxing of lending criteria could also have wider repercussions, as job losses due to government spending cuts are widely expected.

Barclays has promised to reimburse any fees or costs caused as a result of a banking failure last weekend. Irate customers were left without access to their cash when a nationwide crash paralysed ATMs, telephone and online banking as well as debit card transactions.

How do you budget in London?

It’s hard, especially when you first arrive. I have all of my expenses taken out as soon as the pay goes in because the best temptation is no temptation. Tips on making your money go further when you arrive?

Organise to doss with someone when you first get here and have a set daily limit until you have settled down with accommodation and employment. Any major expenses?

I have to send money home so that ends up being a major expense as the pound is very weak. Last big blowout?

I recently went to watch the Tour de France in Holland and it got a little out of hand.

MONEY FOR NOTHING Everybody wants money for nothing, and a survey from moneysupermarket.com confirmed the lengths that some people are prepared to go to for £400 » Of the 2,089 adults surveyed, » More alarmingly, 25 per cent would happily lick the pavement. » For something as easy as filling out a competition form, 75 per cent would agree. » Over half said they would wait in a queue for four hours or write a 1,000 word essay.

24 per cent would be willing to take part in a medical experiment. » And 9 per cent of men (and 3 per cent of women) said they would be a crash test dummy. For £400? Times must be tight.

Getty Images, TNT Images

After rent and travel, food is probably your biggest outgoing, but cutting down on eating out shouldn’t mean seeing your friends less. Despite the abundance of voucher deals now available, you will invariably end up spending more than you intended in a high street restaurant, especially after you factor in the cost of drinks and dessert (I’m sure they put the prices up to compensate). Take it in turns with your mates to host dinner instead; you’ll be surprised by how cheaply you can whip up a meal for four. Ask your guests to bring wine or dessert and you’ll end up having a fab evening for less than a fiver.

travellers should buy flights exactly eight weeks in advance, and wait until the afternoon. One economist told The Economic Journal: “To make consumers take their chances, airlines have to offer advance purchase discounts. As a consequence, ticket prices increase as the travel date

Job Administration From Newcastle, Australia Lives Shepherd’s Bush Age 32

tntjobs.co.uk BEST OF THE WEB THE SAVANNA T: 0208 971 9177 www.thesavanna.co.uk The Savanna is the largest retailer of South African and Zimbabwean products in the UK. We sell over 600 products, have our own in-house butchery, and have recently opened our sixth store in Victoria station.

JOB OF THE WEEK: Assistant Store Manager Location: Central London Salary: Competitive We are looking for staff with 1-2 years retail experience. Please only apply if you have a knowledge of SA/Zim products. Excellent customer care and a fun personality required. Marie Gardshol | wimshop@thesavanna.co.uk

GINA CONWAY AVEDA SALONS & SPAS T: 020 8090 5818 www.ginaconway.co.uk

JOB OF THE WEEK: Stylists and Beauty Therapists Location: Notting Hill, Fulham,Wimbledon & Chelsea Salary: Competitive with benefits

Gina Conway Aveda Salons and Spas are a global award winning brand in London. Offering bespoke guest experiences, we are a committed team of professionals.

Experienced stylists and Beauty Therapists wanted - The ideal candidate will need to be motivated, enthusiastic, reliable and have outstanding customer care skills. Applicants from overseas with a current work visa welcomed.

PROACTIVE TECHNICAL RECRUITMENT LIMITED T: 01784-487600 www.proactive-tech.co.uk

JOB OF THE WEEK: Truck & Bus Technicians Location: London Salary: Best Rates

Proactive Technical Recruitment specialise in recruitment solutions throughout the Engineering sector. We offer a complete service to employers and candidates.

RENARD RESOURCES T: 020 7287 2299 www.renardresources.co.uk Est. in 1996. A boutique hospitality recruitment agency supplying to 5 star hotels, restaurants, contract and event caterers

MR TOPPERS T: 020 7734 3831 / 020 7434 4088

Laura Dando | 020 8090 5818 | hr@ginaconway.co.uke

We urgently require HGV & PSV Technicians all over London. You will be responsible for the Service, Repair and Maintenance of some of the countries leading Operators vehicles. You will have strong previous experience working on Heavy Goods Vehicles, you will also be qualified in Heavy Vehicle Maintenance or a relevant subject. Andy Jennings | 01784-487600 | andy@proactive-tech.co.uk

JOB OF THE WEEK: Waiting and bar staff - Open day 1st Sept Location: Greater London Salary: : £6 - £8 + Holiday We require energetic individuals for the coming busy period to join our team of waiting staff on a flexible basis. Please forward your C.V or pop into the office for the OPEN day on Wednesday 1st September. Candy Rozier |020 7287 2299|temps@renardresources.co.uk

JOB OF THE WEEK: Top Hairdressers Wanted Location: Central London Salary: £300-£500 pounds a week Top hairdresser wanted to work in busy salon in heart of London, must be friendly and fun. Has to have 4 or more years experience in the industry and able to work full time and able to speak good english.

Becky 07702 153 524 or 020 7434 4088 | Giovanna 07578 785 288

ORIGIN LTD T: 01524 34100 www.origincare.com Origin provides live-in carers in the homes of young adults with a spinal injury. The work is varied and rewarding. We provide free training, good rates of pay and paid holidays.

JOB OF THE WEEK: Live-in Carers/Personal Assistants Location: Nationwide Salary: Start on £504 per week We require 5 live-in carers/Personal Assistants to fill current positions. You will have an out going, friendly personality and be able to work under the direction of the client. Typically people who do this job are educated, independent and happy to work in one-to-one situations. No experience necessary - can do attitude essential. John | 020 7617 7894 | www.origincare.com/careapp

LOOKING FOR YOUR NEXT JOB? NEW JOBS ONLINE EVERY DAY To advertise your job of the week contact the TNT sales team| 020 7341 6767 | sales@tntmagazine.com

Targeting the Best in Edinburgh, Scotland

Demand continues to be high for qualified finance professionals in Scotland’s Capital. Quality opportunities exist in temporary, contract and permanent markets and include challenging roles within international organisations and high-profile positions in smaller, expanding companies. Roles are broad-ranging but include financial and management reporting accountants, financial and business analysts, decision support and risk professionals. If you are a qualified finance professional and interested in a move to Edinburgh please contact us for more information. For those new to the area we will endeavour to assist you with any relocation queries.

T: +44(0)131 225 8030 - E: tnt@wilkinsonandassociates.co.uk - W: www.wilkinsonandassociates.co.uk 46 Melville Street, Edinburgh, EH3 7HF, UK

Important Tier 1 Visa Changes – 6th April 2010 From the 6th of April, points for Bachelor degrees will be reinstated for initial Tier 1 (General) visa applications. If you are already in the UK on a Tier 2 (Work Permit) visa, you may now be eligible to convert to a Tier 1 visa provided you fulﬁl the remaining points based requirements. Contact us now to discuss your eligibility and options!

We offer a full suite of visa and immigration services: > > > > > >

Tier 1 (General) and Tier 1 (Post-study) Tier 1 extensions from HSMP Work Permit to Tier 1 conversions Tier 2/Work Permits Ancestry visa and extensions Spousal/Partner/Fiancé visas

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1st Contact Visas are regulated and authorised to provide immigration advice/ services by the Immigration Services Commissioner number F200100004.

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COMING & GOING ACCOMMODATION There are Antipodeans and South Africans calling all parts of London home, but generally they tend to head west (Acton, Shepherd’s Bush, Fulham, Hammersmith), north (Dollis Hill, Kilburn, Willesden Green) or south (Clapham, Southfields, Tooting). For listings see tntmagazine. com/accommodation. Dossing Offer to chip in £5 a night minimum. Hostels Expect to pay at least £10-£25 a night. Sharing You can share a room for about £50 a week, while a room to yourself will start at around £80 a week. Going it alone A bedsit or studio is at least £150 a week. Bills Bills can include phone, gas, electricity, water, council tax and a TV licence. Bond This is usually a month’s rent. You may also have to pay one month’s rent in advance. Leases You may need to sign a lease, which will typically run for six or 12 months.

ASK THE EXPERTS Marissa Murdock EXPERT, VISABUREAU.COM

I am an Australian citizen currently on a two-year Tier 5 working holiday visa. I am wondering if it is possible for me to apply for a five-year ancestry visa once my Tier 5 has expired. My grandmother was not born in the UK or Ireland but she does have British citizenship as both of her parents were born in England. What are the rules around ancestry visas and how do I apply?

An ancestry visa allows citizens from Commonwealth countries to work and settle in the UK if they have British-born grandparents. An individual on an ancestry visa is free to enter the UK and work without

restrictions. The visa is usually valid for five years, and can be renewed as many times as you want. In order to qualify you need a grandparent physically born in the UK (or what is now the Republic of Ireland before March 31, 1922). Being only a British citizen is not sufficient. If you are on a Tier 5 visa and you did qualify you would then need to return to Australia to lodge an entry clearance application. Tier 5 holders cannot apply for an ancestry visa from within the UK.

» For more, see visabureau.com. To ask a question about getting started or moving on email realitycheck@tntmagazine.com you want, though it’s usual to give a month’s notice and help find someone to move in. Pay and cancel your bills

Namely council tax, internet, phone, gas, electricity, TV, gym membership, insurance. Settle overdrafts and credit cards Any defaults on bank

payments will be filed with a credit reference agency (making it difficult for you to set up an account or rent a flat if you return), or you could receive a County Court Judgement.

EMPLOYMENT Getting a job doesn’t have to be an impossible task. Register with a couple of agencies, the cream of which advertise in TNT and at tntjobs.co.uk. Most recruitment agencies handle specific sectors: IT, banking, finance, secretarial, legal, medical and teaching are the broad categories. Make an appointment to see a consultant, and take your passport, CV and references with you. Some agencies will help you open a bank account.

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NATIONAL INSURANCE You need a National Insurance (NI) number to work in the UK. Call 0845 600 0643 to make an appointment to apply for one. Some NI contributions go into a State Second Pension (S2P). You can contract out of this and direct the money into a private pension fund instead. You’ll need to do this before the end of the tax year or your contributions will be lost.

TAX

TNT’S TOP TIP

Join your local library and you can borrow any book and (almost) any DVD or CD for free.

» Email your tips to reality check@tntmagazine.com

TNT online Check out tntmagazine.com/ movingtolondon if you’re on your way, tntmagazine.com/ leavingtheuk if you’re going.

MOVING ON CHECKLIST Resign from work How

much notice you need to give your employer will depend on your contract (usually two weeks to three months). You must give at least one week’s notice if you’ve been in your job for a month or more. Give notice on your flat

Check the conditions of your Tenancy Agreement. If you want to leave before your lease is up you may be liable to pay until new tenants are found. If you’re living in a sharehouse and haven’t signed a contract, you can move out whenever

The UK tax year begins on April 6, and if you work only part of the tax year you should get some tax back. The tax threshold is £6475 per year – so if you earn less than this, you won’t pay any tax. You’ll need a P45 (when you leave a job) and a P60 (at the end of the tax year). If you’re leaving the UK and won’t work again before the end of the tax year, you can claim a rebate by filling in a P85.

SHIPPING Get plenty of quotes, checking sizes and whether customs and tax charges are covered. For sea freight (which should take no longer than 12 weeks to arrive) you’ll pay about £80£150 for your first box – less for suitcases – and £30-£90 for additional boxes.

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JUST ARRIVED

HAVE YOUR SAY! Vote for your favourite at tntmagazine.com/twpa

The shortlists for the 20th annual TNT Travel Writing And Photography Awards have been selected by our panel of judges, and voting for the Readers’ Choice has now opened.

The

th Annual Travel Writing & Photography Awards

VOTE ONLINE TO DECIDE WHO WINS In association with

The winner of the Readers’ Choice Award for Photography will receive an Olympus EPL1 with Double Zoom Kit and retro camera bag. The winner of the Readers’ Choice Award for Travel Writing gets to take home two Busabout Flexitrip travel passes.

Winners will be announced at the TNT Sun and Snow Travel Show on October 16. tntmagazine.com

TRAVEL GLOBAL VISION An unwell reveller is carried through the crowd during the worldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s biggest tomato fight at the La

TRAVEL

Tomatina festival in BuĂąol, Spain. More than 45,000 people descended on the small Valencian town to throw 100 tonnes of rotten and over-ripe tomatoes at each other.

Photo by Jasper Juinen/ Getty Images

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Whistle stop tour Spend a day delving into Winchester’s rich past WORDS JANINE KELSO

Winchester ENGLAND

ompact Winchester is super-easy to navigate and what’s more, it’s only an hour from London making it an ideal day escape from the big smoke.

MORNING GLORY Winchester’s Great Hall is within spitting

distance of the train station and is home to King Arthur’s Round Table, which weighs a hefty 1200kg and is made from English oak. It’s a fake (King Arthur was a myth, after all) but it dates back to the 13th century so still oozes wow factor. Nearby is the Westgate Museum, a former debtors

prison, which affords sweeping city views and has centuries-old prisoner’s graffiti scratched into the walls and floors.

NOON TIME Winchester Cathedral is crawling with history and is the city’s top draw,

LATE DEALS

TRAVEL

UNDER £250

Visit Oxford, Bath and Stonehenge for £109 with Anderson Tours (020 7436 9304; andersontours.co.uk), including one night’s B&B accommodation, a buffet dinner, coach travel, entrance to Stonehenge and guided sightseeing. Departs September 11. Three nights in Valencia is £197 with Lowcostholidays.com (0800 1116271), including B&B accommodation and flights. Departs September 28. Explore the Belgian city of Bruges for £115 with Flight Centre (0844 800 8628; flightcentre.co.uk), including one night’s B&B accommodation and return Eurostar. Quote: BRULONPAC1. Valid for travel between September 15 and October 30. Offer ends September 30. Enjoy a weekend in the Isle of Wight for £95 with Tracks Travel (0845 130 0936; tracks-travel.com), including return coach from London, ferry crossings, one night’s B&B accommodation and a three-course dinner. Departs September 11. Soak up the sights and sounds of Marrakesh for three nights for £120 with Fleewinter (020 7112 0019; fleewinter.com), including B&B accommodation. Excludes flights. For departures throughout September.

DEAL OF THE WEEK

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DAILY TRAVEL DEALS GO TO tntmagazine.com/travel/latedeals where new travel deals are updated daily. There are more than 30 deals live at any time. Also sign up for TNT’s weekly travel newsletter, which will be emailed to you every Wednesday with the most up-to-date deals and guides to over 170 destinations. Sign up at tntmagazine.com/travelemail.

£250 - £500

OVER £500

A 15-day tour of Egypt with Topdeck (020 8987 3300; topdeck.travel) costs £405, including a felucca cruise, B&B accommodation and some meals. Excludes flights and local payment of US$280. Departs September 5. A 15-day trek to Mount Everest is £487 with STA Travel (0871 2308512; statravel.co.uk). Excludes flights. Departs October 16. A weekend of yoga and meditation in Montmarque, France, is £405, with Practice Yoga (07717 358866; practiceyoga.co.uk/yoga_ holidays), including four nights’ accommodation, all meals and tuition. Begins October 13. An eight-day Morocco tour with Travel Talk (020 8099 8852; traveltalktours.com) is £279. Departs September 18. Excludes flights. Book by September 5.

Take an epic journey on the Trans-Mongolian Express for 21 days for £1998 with Gap Adventures (0844 410 1090; gapadventures.com), including Beijing, Great Wall, Lake Baikal, Moscow and more. Travel before May 31, 2011. Return flights to Sydney with Travelmood (0800 8407 802; travelmood.com) are £609. Valid for travel in September. Flights are with China Airlines. A 13-day Greek Island hopping tour is £1016 (save £179) with Contiki (0845 075 0990; contiki.com/lates). Departs September 15. A 14-day Winter Wonder tour of Europe is £1098 (10 per cent off) with Topdeck Travel (020 8987 3300; topdeck.travel), including B&B accommodation, ferry crossings and sightseeing tours in major cities. Departs October 31.

*All fares are ex-London, unless otherwise stated.

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Three nights in Budapest with Lowcostholidays.com (0800 1116271) is £157. Includes flights and B&B accommodation. Departs September 28.

Stonehenge, England

TRAVEL 63

TNT Weekender Leeds ENGLAND

With its posh Victorian arcades, trendy bars and flash Millennium Square, Leeds could have got a bit big for its boots, but the huge student population and prevailing Yorkshire spirit keep it grounded.

HEADLINE ATTRACTION

britainonview

The nightlife in Leeds is legendary – the Kaiser Chiefs’ tune, I Predict a Riot, was written about a stonking night out here. Superclub Oceania is a multi-roomed cheese fest, Northern Light is the place for funky house, while HiFi plays soul, R&B and motown. Meanwhile, Call Lane is a street full of cool bars. For cheap drinks and a lively buzz, head to the student district of Headingley.

BEST OF THE REST The City Art Gallery has one of the UK’s top collections outside London, and at the

Yorkshire Sculpture Park in the countryside outside Leeds you can enjoy art in the great outdoors. Another stalwart of the Leeds cultural scene is the acclaimed theatre, West Yorkshire Playhouse. The Royal Armouries museum is world class: fire a crossbow, see the world’s largest suit of armour (for an elephant) or watch falconry and jousting in the medieval tilt yard.

Jakes, a 50s-style milkshake bar in Headingley.

NEED TO KNOW

OUT OF TOWN

WHEN TO GO A few weeks before Christmas for some of England’s best festive shopping. GETTING THERE Trains run direct to Leeds from London King’s Cross, and National Express coaches depart from Victoria coach station. GETTING AROUND Leeds is easily explored on foot. Out-of-town attractions, such as the Sculpture Park and Harewood House have good bus connections from the central bus station. GOING OUT A pint of beer costs about £3. ACCOMMODATION Hotel rooms cost from £23 a night. SEE visitleeds.co.uk.

Cricket fans should also visit Headingley for the home ground of Yorkshire County Cricket Club, and the scene of many of England’s greatest victories. Further afield, check out the magnificent interior and gardens at Harewood House.

RETAIL THERAPY CHOW DOWN Teeming with trendy cafes and restaurants, Leeds has plenty of choices. Room, in the city centre, serves up retro dishes with a touch of glitz. For something pricier, French eatery No. 3 York Place is often voted the best place in town. The recently restored Grade I listed Corn Exchange houses Piazza by Anthony, a restaurant from top chef Anthony Flinn, and fine food and drink retailers that sell a tasty array of cakes, chocolate and cheese. For cream teas, visit The Tiled Hall Cafe, wedged between Leeds Art Gallery and Leeds Central Library. If you love retro Americana, get down to Shaky

More than 1000 shops are packed into the city’s heart, laced with pedestrianised streets, charming Victorian buildings and plenty of pubs and clubs to show off your new threads and get chummy with the locals. The Victoria Quarter is a series of Victorian arcades with stained-glass ceilings and trickling fountains. You’ll find designers Louis Vuitton, Vivienne Westwood and others – mixed with more affordable boutiques.

NEXT WEEK BORDEAUX

TNT online For a full travel guide on visiting England go to tntmagazine.com/travel

Leeds

ENGLAND LONDON

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SHORT BREAK

WILD AT HEART

WORDS REBECCA KENT

TRAVEL

Discover an antidote to Ibiza’s clubbing scene and explore the island’s rural landscape

Ibiza BALEARIC ISLANDS, SPAIN

biza is a firmly established hedonist’s paradise, but away from the throbbing basslines of its superclubs and only a few kilometres inland from its squiggly coastline, I discover a seductive rural heart. At the navel of the island’s modest 50km by 18km dimensions is a relatively undiscovered landscape that, with its forested hills and meandering stony roads, is quite the adventurer’s playground. Hiking, biking, kayaking and rock climbing provide an alternative – and an antidote – to Ibiza’s clubbing scene. Give me the heady scent of rosemary and

Enticing: pristine beaches

Kayaking: more satisfying than a booze cruise

wildflowers over nightclub sweat and smoke machines any day.

ON THE FARM My remote base for the weekend is Can Lluc, a farmhouse converted into a rustic luxury rural hotel and one of a clutch of ‘agroturismos’ on the island. It is a term used to describe a place of accommodation in Ibiza’s wooded landscape, sustained by its own farm. With huge terraces and the site shrouded with fragrant jasmine bushes, peeling yourself off a poolside deckchair takes some conviction. But the active pursuits in store are lure enough. HIPPY PAST Setting off from the remote village of Sant Mateu d’aubarca in the north west, we embark on a three-hour hiking trip near takes in the archaeological site of Torres d’en Lluc, which comprises the ruins of two ancient towers and defensive walls that date back to the middle ages. We spy a portly, elderly village woman plucking almonds from a tree canopy and the scene strikes me as timeless – a snapshot of the 1960s when droves of hippies flocked to this mesmerising outpost. Our trail

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NEED TO KNOW WHEN TO GO June to September is the warmest and most fun time to visit. GETTING THERE EasyJet and Ryanair both fly to Ibiza from London. GETTING AROUND Cabs are cheap, otherwise, hire a bike or have an expert guide you from Mammoth Ibiza (ibizasport.com). VISAS Saffas need a Schengen visa. CURRENCY Euro. 1 GBP = 1.21 EUR. San Juan LANGUAGE Sant Mateu Spanish. GOING OUT San Antonio A beer will cost IBIZA EIVISSA about ¤1.80 (but ¤5 at Café del Mar, and ¤10 at a club). ACCOMMODATION There are plenty of options. If you’re venturing out to San Juan and have a few extra euros to spend then Giri Residence – a boutique hotel and space – has received rave reviews for its style and luxury (thegiri.com). Or, the best way to experience rural Ibiza is by staying in agroturismos. SEE ibiza.travel.

EASY RIDER We reward our efforts – not least for overtaking a coach-load of plucky German walkers along the way – with a boozy tapas lunch. But there’s little time to beat ourselves up over our gluttony, as we are suddenly astride our mountain bikes and carving a downhill route along the rugged terrain, through villages and fields, towards the south-west coast and the achingly fashionable and bombastic resort of San Antonio. High on athletic selfrighteousness, we sweep past tanned beachcombers in their whites and oversized sunglasses. MAKE A SPLASH Day two, and with no rest for the wicked or overindulged (last

tntmagazine.com

BEACH OF LEGENDS

Fire starter: San Antonio is a hedonist’s paradise

night we made a serious dent in a seafood paella and the scrumptious traditional Ibizan dessert, greixonera) we slip into kayaks and paddle through the transparent waters off Puerto de San Miguel. Without venturing too far, we duck into caves and skirt rocky islets, then object when the time comes to return to shore.

Ibiza is blessed with some 80 beaches and secluded coves that all boast pristine waters and their own distinct atmosphere, shaped by the local communities and the types of tourists who have traditionally visited. Perhaps one of the island’s most distinguished and idyllic is Benirras beach (above) in the north. It is Ibiza hippydom’s favourite, where folk gather at sunset near the small chiringuito, or refreshment stall, at the far end of the bay. Legendary in Ibizan hippy folklore, the 300m-wide, sandy cove is said to have been the site of wild sex and drug orgies in the 1960s. Head there on summer afternoons to watch bongo players converge to drum down the sunset.

Local charm: picturesque villages

HIT THE CLUBS It would be remiss to travel all this way and swerve the superclubs that have sealed Ibiza’s place so indelibly on the tourist map. So I lose my head a little with the other doofheads in a last hurrah to Ibiza, but as I do, it’s with a smug sense of knowing that I’ve experienced a side of this bewitching island that few others have.

» Rebecca Kent travelled with the Ibiza Tourist Board (ibiza.travel), the Spanish Tourist Office (spain.info) and easyJet (easyjet.com).

xx xxx xxxx ,xxx

Tristan Fewings / PYMCA / Rex Features Rebecca Kent / TNT Images, Getty Images

meanders through vineyards and cultivated fields, and past raggedy farmhouses. Before long we are greeted by sweeping views of the pristine Mediterranean. Taking in the vista atop a rocky cliff top, I pluck a handful of rosemary from the wild and verdant bushes, and with the herb-infused ocean air in my nostrils, we make it to a charming family restaurant, Can Cires.

SEX ON THE BEACH?

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THE

GIRI RESIDENCE HOTEL & SPA IBIZA

TRAVEL 67

A MEDITERRANEAN GETAWAY www.thegiri.com Tradition meets fashion at this intimate and hip home away from home. The Giri Residence a small boutique hotel, located in the north of Ibiza, featuring five unique suites with a warm and inviting atmosphere to create an oasis of tranquility and comfort.

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nt s

HOTSHOTS T ra

sc vel D e als & Di

Hayley Madden TALKS TRAVEL PHOTOGRAPHY

WINNER IGUAZU FALLS, BRAZIL/ ARGENTINA BORDER Andrew Davies, Auckland, New Zealand Andrew has made the most of this awesome sight. Using a vertical format, a high horizon – which reduces the sky to a thin strip – and contrasting black and white treatment, he has really emphasised the power of the water as it crashes over the cliff. The black and white colours enhance the rocks, trees and the grim sky. HOT TIP: When digitally processing, using the ‘levels’ control rather than ‘contrast’ will give you more power over the contrast in your image. » Andrew wins a three-day tour of Scotland for two valued at £198 from Haggis Adventures (0131 557 9393: haggisadventures.com)

TNT online For details of how to enter go to tntmagazine.com/gallery

RUNNER-UP CANARY WHARF Robert Allanson, Sydney, Australia

Saturday, October 16 Ibis Hotel, Earl’s Court Earl’s Court/West Brompton

The viewpoint and framing of these skyscrapers has reduced them to an Escher-esque style composition of cubes, steps and squares. The steam coming off the buildings looks great against the orangeyblack sky and the gap in the centre showing London in the background is very effective. A vertical format suggests

power, growth and strength. HOT TIP: Raising or lowering your viewpoint can have a dramatic effect on any scene – even if you just stand on your toes or kneel to the floor. » Robert wins a photography course from Nigel Wilson Photography (020 7793 8664; photographycourses.org.uk) valued at £60

HOTSHOTS

HOLIDAY SNAPS

HOW TO MAKE YOUR PHOTOS STAND OUT

THEME: PERSPECTIVE Venice by Kate Halstead, Auckland, New Zealand Including a small part of a well-known subject in an image can be more alluring than showing the whole thing. Kate has elegantly captured the prow of a gondola as it crosses this archway.

TRAVEL

WHY THIS WORKS: 1 This is an extremely well recognised shape and scene. No more information is needed to set the context. 2 The shape is framed well against the archway. 3 There is lots of texture with the crumbled wall, glossy gondola and rippling water. 4 A sense of depth is created with the alleyway and the tiny green plant in the background. 5 The main arch is echoed by the one in the distance, again emphasising perspective.

HOT TIPS: 1 Choose a subject that has interesting form and texture as it will essentially be abstracted once you start ‘chopping’ it up. 2 The position where the subject enters the frame influences the mood. From the top or right is oppressive and resistant while from the left or bottom is forceful. 3 Be careful when using people as partial subjects. Chopping off at the neck, waist or at any of the joints is disconcerting. 4 Decide whether your subject is ‘entering’ or ‘exiting’ the image. Entering gives a feeling of anticipation and a feeling of emancipation. 5 Keep backgrounds uncluttered and related to give the subject room and context.

GRAB YOURSELF A BARGAIN FLIGHTS • TOURS • HOLIDAYS • ACCOMMODATION

Saturday, October 16 | 9.30am - 6pm tntmagazine.com

TIPS St Lucia, Caribbean

READERS’ TIPS FREE DAY OUT

TRAVEL

A great way to save TIP OF money when THE WEEK planning to visit National Trust properties in and around London is to find out when they have open days. Admission is completely free and usually there are extra activities laid on, such as a mini festival in the grounds, which make for a great day out.

Ross, via email

RUN FOR IT

YOU ASKED FOR IT Tom Hall FROM LONELY PLANET

Always take a pair of trainers with you when you travel. Running in a foreign city is a great way to sightsee and explore a new area. You may even be able to join a local race on a Sunday morning. Ask a local shoe shop for race opportunities or running groups. Renato, via email

To cut a long story short: I’m heading home to NZ for good (boo hoo) and I want to stop off in the Caribbean on the way. What’s the best island, and which is the cheapest route to take? Extra issues: two kids under three years old. Your advice would be invaluable, and will bring an end to our epic six-year quest that has taken in 36 countries from Iceland to Turkey, Gibraltar to Sweden! Andy, via email

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Ah, the missing link. Not the connectors between Hominid species sought by Darwin, but the last part of the chain taking adventurous travellers thousands of miles without getting on a plane. The bad news is that there is no scheduled passenger sea link between Australia and Bali, or anywhere else for that matter. You may be able to hop on a passing yacht; while I’ve poo-pooed this notion in the past and been chided by readers who have said it can be done, I have yet to meet anyone who has made it to Australia this way. I have met people who’ve made it all the way overland. They didn’t go as far as Bali. They got to Singapore where they had booked themselves onto a freighter ship making the journey to various Australian ports, booked through freightertravel.co.nz. Upsides of this? They completed the journey with a sea voyage. The downsides? A cost in excess of the air fare multiplied by three, a need to book many months in advance and the discovery that two weeks on a freighter is not that interesting. Any yachties who wish to smite me with their experiences can email the usual address.

Email your words of wisdom to traveltips@tntmagazine.com. Tip of the Week wins a Lonely Planet guide and other published tips win a fiver.

WIN

Lonely Planet’s Tom Hall will give you the benefit of his infinite wisdom if you email a question to traveltips@tntmagazine.com. If he answers your question, you’ll win a Lonely Planet guide of your choice. TNT readers can get 20 per cent off all Lonely Planet guides valued at more than £12.99. Enter promotional code PTNT01 at shop.lonelyplanet.com.

This is a reader forum — TNT and Lonely Planet accept no responsibility for any loss, injury or inconvenience sustained by anyone using the information provided.

TNT Images

Whatever way you cut the cake, adding in the Caribbean to this itinerary is going to send your costs up, up and away. A straight one-way from London to Auckland in November costs £677. If you add in a stopover in Miami and a side flight to, say, Tobago or St Lucia then you’re looking at £850 at least, per adult, and almost that again for any infant requiring a seat. To get anywhere near this fare you should talk to the flight-finding magicians at rtwflights.com. But when I was looking, I couldn’t get anything for under £2000 for departures in, say, November. It’ll be easier and cheaper to abandon the Caribbean, fly via Singapore or Bangkok and head instead to a Thai island or Bali. It’ll also be cheaper once you’re there. Go in December or January and prices get higher. I’m sure you’ll find a way. Unless anyone else has any better ideas?

I’m planning an overland trip from London to Brisbane. I have most of it mapped out, but I am missing one small piece of the puzzle – Indonesia to Australia. Neal, via email

TRAVEL NEWS

£9 London hotel room

Anstruther, Scotland

NEW ROUTES Ryanair will launch new flights from Gatwick to Faro, Porto, Bologna, and Milan, from October 31. Meanwhile, budget airline Iceland Express is set to introduce a temporary new service to Orlando from October 2-24. Prices will start at £224 one-way, including taxes.

TOPLESS TROUBLE An Italian court has rejected a complaint by a mother who said her two young sons, aged 11 and 14, were “troubled” by the sight of a voluptuous woman putting on suntan lotion on the beach. Police were called to the scene following a row in which the mother asked the busty bather to cover herself up. The woman’s lawyer later argued that it is not illegal to go topless on Italian beaches, and the case was thrown out.

TNT Images

STUFFED ANIMALS One in four grown men travel with a stuffed toy animal on every trip they go on, according to a Travelodge hotel survey. The men even admitted to taking their cuddly buddy on a “trip with the guys”.

TRAVEL

A new budget hotel opens in London this week, with rooms from as little as £9 a night. Guests at Tune Hotel, Westminster (tunehotels.com) will, however, be expected to fork out £1.50 for a towel, £2 for a hair dryer and £3 a day to watch TV. And if you want a maid to clean up, you’ll have to stump up £7.50. On average, rooms cost £35 a night.

UK JAUNTS UNDERRATED Strolling along Scotland’s wild beaches and foraging for fossils on Dorset’s Jurassic Coast are among Britain’s most underrated days out, according to a Lonely Planet survey. Seal spotting on the Gower Peninsula in Wales and cycling in Suffolk also made it onto the list of undervalued day trips, along with visiting a gastropub in the Cotswolds and boating on the Thames. “Days out in Britain don’t have to be traditional seaside jaunts or tours of stately homes,” said Lonely Planet travel editor Tom Hall. “Scotland’s stunning beaches are, quite rightly, recognised as some of the best.” More than 3500 people voted in the Lonely Planet Awards, which also revealed nightmare

holiday ideas, which varied from staying in an all-inclusive resort in Benidorm, Spain in August, to drinking at a bar in San Antonio, Ibiza on a Saturday night. Survey respondents said that if they won the lottery, the top choice of what to do would be to take a year out and travel the world on a yacht. The greatest cultural experience was deemed to be reggae by the beach on a warm night in Negril, Jamaica, while the greatest historical experience was dubbed a visit to the Mayan temples at Tikal in Guatemala, beating the Taj Mahal in India, and Egypt’s Pyramids. Finally, travellers said that if they could only eat one type of cuisine for the rest of their life, they would opt for Italian.

Women are better packers Despite the commonly held belief that women travel with bulging suitcases or backpacks, stuffed full of useless items, research has shown that ladies win the battle of the sexes when it comes to packing. A recent survey by HolidayExtras.com revealed that it is men who fail to pack light, with the majority (64 per cent) returning from holiday with 20 per cent of their clothes unworn, 10 per cent more than women. However, when it comes to shoes, women take away far

Very necessary items

TNTMAGAZINE.COM MOST POPULAR DESTINATIONS 1 Spain 2 England 3 France 4 Germany 5 Italy

HOTTEST KEYWORDS ON TNTMAGAZINE.COM/TOURSEARCH

more pairs then men. A total of 92 per cent of men take up to three pairs of shoes on holiday, compared with 67 per cent of women. More than a quarter of ladies take between four and nine pairs of shoes away with them, with seven per cent of those polled travelling with 10 or more choices of footwear.

1 Egypt 2 Europe 3 Morocco 4 Oktoberfest 5 Croatia powered by

FREE ONLINE GUIDES Go to tntmagazine.com/ travel for travel guides on more than 170 destinations.

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ON THE ROAD

WORDS FRANKIE MULLIN

FESTES DE LA MERCE

TRAVEL

Barcelona, Spain September 24, 2010 A Catalan festival celebrating the Virgin Of Mercy. Giant wooden figures and firebreathing ‘devils’ chase crowds down the streets, and the cava (the champagne of Catalonia) runs freely.

» bcn.cat/merce

GALWAY OYSTER FESTIVAL GALWAY CITY, COUNTY GALWAY, IRELAND WHAT: Every autumn, tens of

thousands of Ireland’s prized molluscs are washed down with buckets of Guinness as visitors from all over the world flock to what is one of Ireland’s most beautiful counties. Don’t miss the World Oyster Opening Championships or the Oyster Pearl (festival queen) Contest. WHERE: Venues all over the city. Check out the Guinness Oyster Trail for pubs giving

out free oysters with your pint. WHY: It began in 1954 and in 1960, film director John Houston ate a spectacular 3000 oysters. DO IT BECAUSE: It’s a brilliant craic and a massive piss up. HOW MUCH: Events vary.

» galwayoysterfest.com

TNT online For more upcoming events, see our destination guides at tntmagazine.com/travel

ON THE ROAD WITH FRANKIE MULLIN

LOCK IT IN HALLOWEEN PARADE New York City, USA Oct 31, 2010 halloween-nyc.com

TAR BARREL ROLLING Ottery St Mary, England Nov 5, 2010 otterytourism.org.uk

HOGMANAY DASHAIN Kathmandu, Nepal, Sep-Oct, 2010, 15 days ending on the full moon Goddess worship in its bloodiest form. Thousands of animals are beheaded in a giant sacrifice, traditionally to provide meat for poor families. A procession of swords also takes place.

» welcomenepal.com

Where in the world?

Edinburgh, Scotland Dec 31, 2010 edinburghshogmanay.org

VENICE CARNIVAL Venice, Italy Feb 25-Mar 8, 2011 veniceconnected.com

RIO CARNIVAL Rio de Janeiro, Brazil Mar 4-8, 2011 rio-carnival.net

THE TRAVELLER … Tyrone Swift, 23, from Alice Springs, Australia What do you miss most about home?

The cold beer – it’s warm everywhere you go over here. The size of the apartments and the working hours. So what do you like about the UK?

The career opportunities. Have you got any trips planned?

Scott Brindley from Whitton, NSW, Australia at Lord’s Cricket Ground, London

tntmagazine.com

Getty Images

WIN

Been somewhere good lately? Send us a horizontal photo of yourself with a copy of TNT from anywhere around the world and, if we print it, you’ll win a day trip for two to Bath and Stonehenge with Anderson Tours, valued at £90. » Email your pictures to ontheroad@tntmagazine.com along with your name, where you’re from and where the photo was taken, or see tntmagazine.com/world. Files must be at least 500Kb.

I’m going to France at Christmas to meet my girlfriend’s family. And Edinburgh looks interesting.

TOP FIVE

FIVE SHOPPING BREAKS

THE INSIDER BRIAN REES, HEAD OF PRESS AND PR, P&O FERRIES

MARRAKESH, MOROCCO WHAT: Exotic Marrakesh is a shopper’s paradise with its colourful and lively souks (markets) sited off main square Jemaa El Fna. Expect to see a dazzling array of lanterns, slippers, ceramics and jewellery, as well as the ubiquitous spice peaks, which make for fabulous photo opportunities. Haggling is part of the fun of souk shopping, so always offer at least half the asking price. SEE: visitmorocco.com.

TRAVEL 73

NEW YORK CITY, USA WHAT: From vintage havens to designer showrooms, New York City is a magnet for shopaholics for good reason. Make a beeline for iconic department stores, such as trendy Barneys, Bloomingdale’s with its famous brown bags, and nine-floored Macy’s. If you love vintage clothes and record shops, visit the East Village and Brooklyn. SEE: nycgo.com.

ISTANBUL, TURKEY WHAT: Istanbul is home to the legendary Grand Bazaar, an enormous labyrinth of 61 covered streets encompassing 4,400 shops, which first opened its doors to traders in 1461. Shoppers can find everything from jewellery and carpets to leather and antiques. SEE: gototurkey.co.uk.

LISBON, PORTUGAL WHAT: Discover vintage shops and bohemian boutiques in Barrio Alto. For gorgeous hand-stitched leather gloves, visit tiny Luvaria Ulisses in the Chiado Quarter. Flea market Feira de Ladra, open from Monday to Saturday, is also worth a look. SEE: visitlisboa.com.

MILAN, ITALY WHAT: For big name fashion boutiques, head to Milan. Streets around Montenapoleone are lined with the likes of Armani, Prada and Versace. For factory seconds and warehouse returns, visit the outlets around Vittorio Emanuele II. SEE: italiantouristboard.co.uk.

TNT Images, Getty Images

The best part of my job is … that I can visit France any time I like. Well, not any time obviously, but I can go an awful lot and I never tire of it. My most challenging travel experience was ... a chat with a policeman in Acapulco, Mexico over a US$10 fine for speeding. I said I’d just walked off the beach, so he said the fine had just risen to $20. I pointed out I didn’t even have a car. He said the fine had gone up to $50. I told him to f*** off. He pinned me against the wall, stuck a pistol in my chest and offered to shoot me. I gave him $50. My most memorable travel experience was … a night in a mountain hut in the Pyrenees with two Israeli women who were dodging national service. I always pack … Debbie, my double bass. You get a whole new perspective on travel if you cart a double bass around. The next trip on my travel wishlist is … to cycle around Ireland with Debbie to trace my family (my mother's a Murphy). That would be a great craic. I need to work it out though as Debbie's a big lass. My guilty travel pleasure is … gatecrashing wedding receptions and kissing the bride, obviously.

JANINE KELSO GIVES A HIGH FIVE!

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A RIVER RUNS

THROUGH IT Enjoy a taste of Vietnam by visiting the Mekong Delta WORDS SARAH WARWICK

TRAVEL 75

Mekong Delta VIETNAM

“O

h Lord, help me, I’m going to die!” Crossing the road in Vietnam’s second biggest metropolis, Ho Chi Minh City, is a traumatic experience. After just a few hours in the city I’d nearly been run over a dozen times. There are four million motorbikes in the city and not one of them

will stop for something as inconvenient as a pedestrian crossing. A massive and über-modern metropolis, Ho Chi Minh City (or Saigon) isn’t what I’d expected from Vietnam. Call me naïve but I imagined girls with sheets of long, dark hair, dressed in long silk tunics (ao dai) and conical hats, cycling through

paddy fields, winking at boys perched on the heads of buffalo. Ho Chi Minh City is exciting, vibrant and busy but it’s like any modern city. Where was I going to find the Vietnam of my dreams?

RURAL IDYLL I trawled the travel agents of the Pham

NEED TO KNOW WHEN TO GO Temperatures vary little in the south, but the north is cold during winter, especially the far north where temperatures get down to freezing. Avoid visiting during Tet (Vietnamese New Year) when everything closes. The Mekong Delta is often flooded in September. GETTING THERE Many airlines fly from London to HCMC, including Qantas, Air New Zealand, Qatar and Cathay Pacific. GETTING AROUND Hop-on/hop-off buses are good value. Trains from north to south provide a slower and more scenic journey, while flights to all the major cities and resorts are also an affordable option. VISAS Aussies, Kiwis and South African all need visas. These are available from any Vietnamese embassy. The UK embassy charges £38 for a singleentry, 30-day tourist visa. CURRENCY Vietnamese Dong. 1 GBP = 28,910 VND. LANGUAGE Vietnamese. GOING OUT Bia Hoi (fresh beer) can be bought by the pitcher on street corners for as little as 10,000 dong (35p). Bottled beer, like Saigon Green or Hanoi, is generally about 16,000 dong (60p). ACCOMMODATION Dorm beds are rare and cost about £4.50. Single rooms (sleeps two) start at about £7. SEE vietnamonline.com and vietnamtourism.com.

TNT online For a full travel guide on Vietnam go to tntmagazine.com Hustle and bustle: Ho Chi Minh City

Ngu Lao backpacking district for answers. There were numerous adverts for trips to the Mekong Delta, in the country’s fertile south. This area, nicknamed the rice bowl of Vietnam, is famous for its network of streams and canals, bright green paddy fields and what sounded like an idyll of traditional rural life. Excited, I jumped on a bus the very next day for a two-day boat and bus trip down to the delta. Organised tours aren’t usually my thing but I was short on time and keen to escape the motorbikes. The first port of call is a honey farm in My Tho. As the boat sneaks into mangrove forests on the far side of the river, I start to feel that it’s somewhere a bit special. We decamp from the big boat and into kayaks paddled by young girls with sheets of dark hair and conical hats. This is more like it, I think.

A crazy, beautiful country

Old ladies sell “ cabbages from their coracles ”

FISH SUPPER It’s lunchtime next, and I’m glad to see pork isn’t on the menu. Instead we’ve got the traditional Mekong dish of elephant ear fish, named, you’ve guessed it, because it looks like the ear of an elephant. The flesh is meaty and delicious. It falls off the skeleton into paper-thin pancakes, ready to be doused with sweet, spicy sauce and eaten with the local rice, said to be the tastiest in all Vietnam. The afternoon consists of more sunny boat rides, an on-boat sing song (cringe!) and trips to a local coconut collective, where the ladies stock up on coconut oil and souvenir ao dai and the blokes stuff their faces with coconut candy.

Pulling up at the farm, we’re offered super-sweet tea flavoured with local honey and get the chance to pose with hundreds of bees. It’s not really my kind of buzz so I shuffle to the back of the group, eager not to be volunteered for beeholding duties. A snuffling sound at my ankles distracts me and I look down to see a tiny pot-bellied pig. Delighted to meet one of Vietnam’s world-famous porkers, I get my picture taken with him instead.

REAL DEAL Although the tour is very much the organised sort, with ‘opportunities’ to buy souvenirs at every attraction, I’m relishing being in the countryside. As we head away from My Tho and on towards our Mekong homestays for the night, the afternoon sunlight plays on the riverbanks around us giving everything a green glow. I see a lone cyclist in a lon la (conical hat) and sigh with pleasure, releasing all the

Getty Images, Alvaro Leiva

tntmagazine.com

A different world: find the ‘real Vietnam’

BIG TRIP THE MIGHTY MEKONG

FLOAT MY BOAT On the second day we get up very early and head to the floating markets. Pineapples, dragon fruits, onions and other items come from further up the Mekong, from Cambodia, overnight and are sold from boat to boat. The wares of each vessel are advertised on a long pole: we watch pumpkins, potatoes and pomelos waggling in the breeze as we anchor and watch the bargaining for a bit. As I spend my last minutes on the Mekong, watching grinning old ladies trying to sell cabbages from their coracles. I realise that places can’t always be the way that we imagine them. Whatever I expected from this crazy, beautiful country, the reality is far better.

NEXT WEEK: PLANNING CHRISTMAS BREAKS

Colour among the chaos

Sapa

HANOI

One of the longest rivers in the world – the Mekong (or Mekhong) runs from the Tibetan Plateau, through China’s Yunnan province, Burma, Laos, Thailand, Cambodia and Vietnam before emptying into the South China Sea. The delta is one of the most fertile areas in the world, enriched with silt minerals from the soils of northern Asia and one of the biggest rice-growing areas in the world, but sadly is at risk from damming and pollutants. The cheapest options for Mekong Delta trips can be found in the numerous tour operators in Saigon. For longer trips, or an organised tour upriver, try Intrepid (intrepidtravel.com) for a two-day delta tour (£95) or Steppes (steppestravel.co.uk) for an eight-day cruise from the Mekong Delta up to Siem Reap in Cambodia (from £2,400 including flights).

VIETNAM

Ho Chi Minh City

Water world: the mighty Mekong

Mekong Delta

Whether you’re after snow or sun, we help you plan your festive getaways

Getty Images, TNT Images

THE LOVE MARKET Founded by the French almost 100 years ago, the hill station of Sapa in northern Vietnam has only been open to tourism since 1999, and it’s now a hub for trekking and climbing. The area is home to a large number of local tribes, including the colourfully dressed H’mong and Dzao people, who act as trekking guides across terraced hillsides of rice paddies. These local people have their own tribal languages and, young people especially, will probably speak better English than Vietnamese. They also have some very unusual local customs, among them is the age-old tradition of the ‘Love Market’. On Saturday nights, young Red Dzao girls hide in the dark and sing songs to encourage young men to find them. The young couple

then disappear into the forest for three days together, a possible beginning to their life together. Although the ‘Love Market’ still exists in name, this is largely as a draw for tourist ‘dolla’. Nowadays, the sheer volume of tourists means you’re more likely to find young girls playing pool in the popular H’Mong Sister bar, or chatting to westerners, than serenading anyone from the bushes. Australian film maker Shalom Almond’s 2009 film The Love Market looked at the impact of tourism on the young girls of the Black H’Mong tribe. Look out for the film at next year’s Australian Film Festival or watch the trailer at http://tiny.cc/0mjsw.

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tension built up in Ho Chi Minh City’s muggy traffic. Is it the real Vietnam? Some would say an organised tour is never the real reflection of a country but it does have its upsides. Not having to organise my own transport means I can enjoy the scenery. One of my companions is Francesco, an amateur photographer. He shows me shots from this trip. Two women gossiping while making rice noodles, a small girl peeking at the ong tay (‘westerners’) from a door frame and a particularly good shot of macho meat sellers outside a butchers. None of them give any suggestion that they were taken from a tourist boat.

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A weekend in Krakow, thermal baths in Budapest, a great eastern European insight. PRAGUE TO BUDAPEST – 7 DAYS 6 NIGHTS

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HORSE RIDING IN WALES 18/09/10, 02/10/10, 16/10/10, 30/10/10 ISLE OF WIGHT 11/09/10, 02/10/10, 06/11/10 NORMANDY D DAY LANDING BEACHES 10/09/10, 08/10/10, 05/11/10 AMSTERDAM 24/09/10, 22/10/10, 19/11/10 BRUGGE 11/09/10, 02/10/10, 30/10/10 CARDIFF CASTLE WELSH BANQUETS 18/09/10, 02/10/10, 16/10/10,30/10 PARIS & VERSAILLES 17/09/10, 15/10/10, 12/11/10, 10/12/10 WEST COUNTRY TOUR 11/09/10, 02/10/10, 06/11/10 COTSWOLD JEWELS 02/10/10, 06/11/10

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Dear Ross: Thank you for

making sure I got home safe on Friday, August 13. It was short and sweet and lovely to meet you. We never exchanged numbers unfortunately :-( All I know about you is that you have a flatmate called Porky, work in cricket and live in Barnes Bridge. I will return to the place we met in hope that I see you there! Love the belter.

122

Happy birthday Sarah:

Huggard, have an amazing day celebrating the big 28. YUSSSSSSSSSSSSS xxx Thinking of one: I am a bookish, reasonably unattractive, often selfdeprecating, unmarried and childless 28-year-old, but I like Woody Allen’s classic films, poetry (mostly my own) and ridiculously bad theatre. I don’t think I’m very cool, but I hope you’ll think otherwise. An opposite would be an ideal match. Megan. See tntmagazine.com/seeking. So long Selene: After three years of fun and food, it’s time for you to fly the 37CR nest and head back home to NZ. You’re off for adventures new but we, your well-fed, ikcent mocking mates in London, are going to miss you lots. Def not goodbye, only see you soon for some bears, bro. Love, the 37CR gang. X Up for some new friends: My work schedule ain’t always the same but I’m sure we could find something nice to do. I enjoy music, cooking, travelling, bars and clubs, reading and enjoying life. Hope to hear from you. Take care, Charlot. See tntmagazine.com/seeking.

tntmagazine.com

post your message at tntmagazine.com/seeking or email seeking@tntmagazine.com Dearest Ernie: May your 23rd

be full of bacon rolls and chocolate flakes. Of ‘playtime’ in the park and breaking plates on your forehead. Of squatting in public and gashes from fences. Of “grumpy faces that aren’t your grumpy face” and plenty of paste. Please refrain from sleeping with the dog and accidents on the bus this year. Happy birthday chick! Love Dingo, Budge, Bundy and Ben. Mr S. Poo: Desperately seeking my very own Mr S. Poo to enjoy lazy weekends, hysteriainducing tickle fights and long rides in the country with (must have own tandem bike). In return I offer my heart (BNIB from smoke-free home). Please send photo of you from when you were a cute twoyear-old to Ms S. Pea. Email sweetest.pea85@gmail.com. Loco and OC: You’ve been like a second set of parents to me since I’ve been in The Don and I’ve had enough. Go home and make some freestyling, dancing, brand loving, alcoholic babies that the world is probably not ready for. Will miss the lure tours, extravagant dinners and all

round entertainment you two provide. We appreciate everything you’ve done for us simple folk. As Hot Chip said: “It’s a wild love that I have for my brothers, for my brother,” and The OC shows Cohens rule! Love Buddha and Reeks. Perkins, Perky, Mr P, Jazzy ... The Fresh Prince: It’s been real!

You’ve delivered the best rendition of Spandau Ballet’s Gold we’ve ever heard, carved up the Walkie dance floor with the best of them, and shown some incredible hurdling skills! We wish you all the best in the ‘real’ world. Online – it’ll never catch on. Love ya lots – TNT Crew. The people I met on August 7 in Ibiza, Spain at the Bora Bora beach party: Met a

group of wonderful people at the Bora Bora beach party and would love to reconnect with them (especially the guy). The contact information that was sent to my phone unfortunately did not save :-(, and searching people by first name on FB is next to impossible – lol. The guy is originally from Australia but currently resides in London, the gal beside him and the one

Desperately Seeking is a reader forum, and all messages should be within the spirit of the page; TNT cannot take responsibility for offence caused. No phone numbers can be printed. Messages may be edited for publication. See tntmagazine.com/seeking

on the far right (in the picture uploaded at tntmagazine.com/ seeking) are both from New Zealand. Looking forward and really hoping to reconnect. Cheers, Urszula Toronto, Ontario, Canada. See tntmagazine.com/seeking. K-napp: Right! Time to come clean – who’s paying you and how much to plug NZ internationally? Your country should be proud. All the best on the trip back to the beloved land of the long white cloud. We’ll miss your random Kiwi facts here at the towers. From the TNT Crew. PS. Top up the snack draw on your way out. Belushi’s beauty – the Canberra girl at Belushi’s in Hammersmith: Where for art

thou? Friday nights are not the same without you dancing around, tossing your golden locks about. We miss you and your tight jeans, come back and we promise we’ll tip you this time! Love, your faithful Bundy and Coke (sorry Pepsi!) drinkers. Bundy Bear. Lost Sigma camera lens: Very stupidly left a Sigma wideangle zoom lens on a table at the Walkabout in Covent Garden on Saturday, August 21 – @^&*! The bar staff have my details so it can be left with them if you don’t want to contact me directly, but otherwise, email me at a4sforever@aol.com. That lens has taken some of my best pics and I could really use it back! Jim. Happy birthday sugarbabe:

You’re sweeter than candy floss, prettier than Miss Universe, and swear more than Gordon Ramsey. What’s there not to love?!! You rock! Cx

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