TNT Magazine / Issue 1411 by TNT Magazine

this week September 13-19 / Issue 1411 Free every Monday tntmagazine.com

Front Cover: Deirdre O’Callaghan

EDITOR’S LETTER We know it’s only September, but Christmas – and your next opportunity for a big old travelling blowout – is actually just around the corner, by festive standards anyway. Turn to page 72 for our pick of the best yuletide breaks and tips on how to nab yourself a bargain. If you need something a little closer to home to keep you entertained in the here and now, then check out our feature on afternoon tea in London (page 10) – it’s more than just a cuppa. Our cover rockers this week are the anarchic, but brilliant, Grinderman led by the charismatic Nick Cave. Turn to page 26 to read Alison Grinter’s interview with the band ahead of the release of their new album.

72 Crazy Christmas: organise your festive break now

57 TRAVEL

SAMANTHA BADEN, DEPUTY EDITOR

8 LONDON 8 London Life 10 NICE CUPPA: Find out why the Brits are crazy about afternoon tea 12 Food & Drink 14 Spotted 16 Silly Buggers

18 ENTERTAINMENT 18 19 21 22 23

Celebrity News 62 Challenging terrain: explore Switzerland by bike TNT Life Look Who’s Talking: Layne Beachley Cinema 34 NEWS & SPORT Culture 34 Australia News 36 New Zealand News 38 South Africa News 24 MUSIC & CLUBS 41 The Week In Sport 24 Music 42 Rugby 26 CHAOS THEORY: Grinderman find their sound with album number two 45 NRL 46 AFL 30 Music Listings 48 Premier League 32 Clubbing 49 General 33 Clubbing Listings 50 RAIDING PARTY: Saffa Ernst Joubert is looking for Saracens glory

57 Global Vision 58 SURVIVAL OF THE FITTEST: Learn the skills of an intrepid traveller 60 Late Deals 61 TNTT Weekender: Sarajevo 62 PEAK SEASON: Challenge yourself on two wheels in Flim 64 Hotshots 66 PROTECT YOUR HOLIDAY: Take steps to avoid getting stranded 68 Travel Tips 69 Travel News 70 On The Road 71 Top Five 72 HO HO HO-LIDAY: Plan now to avoid wasting your Xmas break 10 High society: afternoon treats for all

53 CAREERS & MONEY 53 Careers 54 Money 56 Coming & Going

REGULARS 4 Letters 6 Wins 122 Desperately Seeking 21 Layne Beachly talks life after surfing

26 Nick Cave finds his mojo with Grinderman

EDITORIAL Deputy editor Samantha Baden Subs Laura Adcock | Jahn Vannisselroy Travel editor Janine Kelso Sport editor Tom Sturrock Music editor Alison Grinter Web editor Frankie Mullin Staff writer Rebecca Kent Editorial assistant Inger Smith DIGITAL & IT Head of digital marketing and development Syed Ahmad IT manager Stephen Dann ART & PICTURES Art director Shabir Mahmood Senior Designer Astrid Breacker Designer Laura Doyle Picture editor Shila Sultana Picture researcher Laila Pacheco SALES Key accounts Charlotte Page MARKETING & EVENTS Head of marketing and events Jim Zambrano Marketing and events exec XXX XXXXX XXXX Christina McFarlane Marketing and events assistant Phoebe Cherrill Partnerships manager Jaqui Ward ACCOUNTS Finance director Nick Crampton Accounts Margaret Roberts | Alexandra Buchlakova PRODUCTION Head of production Libby West Production manager Jon Cooke Production assistant Justine Mackay TNT PUBLISHING CEO Kevin Ellis Chairman Ken Hurst Receptionist Lisa Lowe TNT Publishing Ltd DISTRIBUTION Emblem Direct Ltd PRINTED BY St Ives Web Ltd NEWS AAP SAPA NZPA PICTURES AAP AP Alamy Getty Images NZPA PA Photos Photolibrary.com Pictures Colour Library Reuters Rex Features Robert Harding SAPA TNT Images PUBLISHER

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TNT Magazine is printed on paper from sustainable forests. There is no business connection between the proprietors of this magazine and TNT Ltd, the worldwide transportation group. Copyright here and abroad of all original materials is held by TNT Magazine. Reproduction in whole or part is forbidden, except with permission of the publishers. Registered as a newspaper at the Post Office.

Expats: it’s time to fight back. I first arrived over here with a spring in my step and smile on my face, ready to live and work for the London dream. The mint job landed at my feet within a few weeks and I was on my way. However things turned sour. I have had friends and acquaintances who tell stories of bosses who would constantly fall short on wage payments. One Kiwi mate is owed over a month of back pay. I naively thought my boss would not do this to me. Wrong! I am now three weeks behind in receiving my wages. Employers get away with it because we let them. I propose a London-wide ‘Expat Strike Day’. All expats – band together and show we can’t, and won’t, be pushed around by bosses. We pay taxes and greatly add to this economy, it’s time we were treated as such! Beau, Acton

Londoners hit the streets during the strike

South Africa to come over here as my husband was too terrified to live in South Africa because he’d been carjacked there. Now it’s happened here too. And guess what? The taxes my husband and I pay go to provide these carjackers with the benefits, money and housing that we deserve. Is the government going to

All expats – band together “ and show we can’t be pushed around by bosses ” JACK OF ALL THIS In the early hours of Sunday morning, my husband was carjacked in Putney, and as he stood there bleeding in the middle of the road, pleading for help, three cars which had just pulled up waited there and then drove off as soon as he had moved out of their way. If one of the drivers had just hooted, or shouted, then perhaps we would still have our car. I can’t just swallow the fact that I gave so many of my worldly possessions away in

NEXT WEEK IN

it took me over two hours, it was a great experience. On the same week Londoners marked the 70th anniversary of the Blitz, I think the tube strike showed this Aussie a little bit of London’s blitz spirit. I’d never seen so many people in trainers striding through Hyde Park on a Tuesday morning – it was great. No industrial action was going to keep them from doing an honest day’s work! Bring on the next tube strike. Dave, Fulham

POOR OLD ROONEY

turn a blind eye to the plight of many other South Africans who have come over to the UK for a better life, so their kids have more opportunities and a better education? It will be interesting, and a welcome change, to see some light which is not just from uncaring people’s headlights.

Is anyone else reeling after the revelations about Wayne Rooney? Not only does this star footballer have to pay for sex with prostitutes, he’s also been more than a little dense about things – apparently leaving the hotel with the working girls and bumping into Ronaldo in the process. Thank god he also scores on the field, eh!

Janine George, via email

Ben, Wimbledon

TUBE STRIKE SPIRIT I live in Fulham and work in Euston. How did I get to work during the tube strike? I walked! And, despite the fact

London

From yoga to meditation, how to detox in the capital

TNT online Catch up with your fellow TNT readers and share your views at tntmagazine.com/forums

Clubbing

Superstar DJ Carl Cox’s last London show this summer

TNT Images, Getty Images, Robin Sellick

WHERE TO GET TNT

FIGHT FOR RIGHTS

LETTER OF THE WEEK

YOUR SAY KIWIS NEED HELP

This is an appeal for Kiwis (and others) living in London to help out their home country in its time of need. Kiwis have always been supported by their homeland, even when abroad, and it’s time to give a little back. Most of us here in Canterbury have been really lucky and have only suffered minimal damage. We’re so lucky that no one died as a result of the earthquake, but it’s taken its human

toll and there has been much damage. Some people have lost their homes and livelihoods, and some are really struggling – emotionally and financially. The government is offering assistance, but there are still some very vulnerable people here who need urgent help. Please log on to redcross.org.nz and help. Thank you very much.

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of Ireland from Shamrocker (shamockeradventures.com), valued at £119. Letters may be edited. Prize is not transferable. Your Say is a reader forum and does not represent the opinions of TNT or its staff.

COMMUNITY CORNER EVENTS AND COMPETITIONS BRIT-OZ SOCIETY Now is your chance to book for the Britain-Australia Society’s Autumn Reception in the House of Lords on September 22. It is held in the Cholmondeley Room and Terrace. To book, see the events section of tntmagazine.com. LAUGH FOR A CAUSE The brightest young British comedians are joining not-for-profit group UP to raise awareness of depression on October 15 at the Union

Sport

We chat to Aussie basketballer Erin Phillips

Chapel in Islington. Tickets for StandUP for Depression, featuring Tom Basden, Jonny Sweet and Sanderson Jones. start at £17.50 from unionchapel.org.uk GILL HICKS COMPETITION Adelaide-born Gill Hicks, survivor of the London bombings and founder of Making a Difference for Peace, has launched an international design competition. For more info see madforpeace.org.

Travel

Discover Belfast’s edgy charm

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A 10-DAY TOUR OF TURKEY FOR TWO We’ve teamed up with Fez Travel to give you and a friend the chance to discover Turkey in style on a 10-day Magic Carpet Tour for two people. Starting in Istanbul you’ll spend 10 days taking in the sights and sounds of Turkey’s highlights including Ataturk’s Mausoleum in Ankara, the underground city of Cappadocia and the battlefields of Gallipoli. Also included is breakfast every day, five dinners and accommodation at four and five-star hotels. Enter at tntmagazine.com/ competitions.

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LONDON LIFE

WHAT’S ON Tom Sturrock PICKS THE BEST OF LONDON THIS WEEK

LONDON

TURNING POINT FESTIVAL FROM £15 WHAT: It’s a mixture of music, theatre and shopping, along with a bunch of other creative pursuits – take a workshop in DJing, fashion styling or photography – all hosted in the iconic Roundhouse theatre. WHEN: September 17-19. DO IT BECAUSE: Summer’s over and these kind of festivals are drying up, so make the most of them before winter sets in. It’s an impressively varied festival that offers plenty of ways to float your boat in one of London’s most culturally rich pockets.

» The Roundhouse, Chalk Farm Rd, NW1 8EH Chalk Farm (roundhouse.org.uk/turningpoint).

Capital idea: Hoxton Square Where west London watering holes are famed for their leafy beer gardens and dark-wood interiors with contemporary tweaking, those out east cultivate a different style – more innovative, more urban. That can sound intimidating if you don’t know your way around that neck of the woods – so if you fancy checking it out but don’t know where to start, Hoxton Square is like a foundation course for drinking on the east side. There are a few highlights

– and it will probably take you more than one visit to find a favourite. Check out the Hoxton Apprentice for a feed and then head round the corner to the magnificently named Zigrid von Underbelly to wet your whistle. The Hoxton Square Bar and Kitchen is a bigger venue in the same stretch that’s wellknown for live music. TS

BRITISH FOOD FORTNIGHT PRICES VARY

LONDON DESIGN FESTIVAL PRICES VARY

There’s great stuff coming up for foodies – the Windmill in Mayfair has events dedicated to British pies or you can take a masterclass in anything from butchery to cheese-tasting.

There are events and exhibitions all over London, but a showcase piece will be in Trafalgar Square. It’s a brilliant event for anyone with an interest in making stuff.

» Several locations around

» Trafalgar Square, WC2N 5DS

London (lovebritishfood.co.uk). Sep 18-Oct 3

Charing Cross (london designfestival.com). Sep 18-26

» Hoxton Square, N1 Old Street GREAT FOR: BON VIVANTS

BRITAIN EXPLAINED LONDON BY NUMBERS

cruising around London. At least. Source: nationalgeographic.com

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When Wembley reopened in 2007 after expensive refurbishments, it boasted a capacity of 90,000, making it the second-largest stadium in Europe, and 2,618 toilets – more than any other structure in the world. The remodelling of the stadium was so expensive, though, that blockbuster concerts are now required to service

the debt and the staging of these concerts plays havoc with the pitch. The surface has had to be relaid three times already and was an absolute

debacle at the business end of last season’s FA Cup. With the Olympic Games around the corner and London bidding for the 2018 World Cup, the state of it remains a major talking point. Wembley first opened in 1923 – it was called the Empire Stadium – and cost £750,000 to construct and, amazingly, was built in just 300 days. Now that’s productivity. TS

Lichfield Mercury, Pawel Libera, Stratford Herald

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Adapted from the novel by Sebastian Faulks, Birdsong tells an epic love story set against the First World War. It was a critics’ favourite when released in 1993, so this play should create plenty of buzz.

The final stage of this cycle race takes place out near London’s docks, winding 100km along the route that will be used for the 2012 Olympic Games. It all ends with a big fireworks display.

» Comedy Theatre,

» Royal Victoria Dock,

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London’s most impressive buildings (including Lloyds of London, above) open to the public. If this city’s architecture fascinates you, this is a great chance to check out the capital’s famous addresses.

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Actor and comedian Miles Jupp talked his way on to England’s 2006 tour of India and is now relating the story of his adventures. Heckle him mercilessly if he starts talking up the Poms’ Ashes chances.

» Soho Theatre, 21 Dean St, Tottenham Court W1D 3NE Road (sohotheatre.com). Sep 17-18

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A P P U C E NIC

nice cup of Earl a t jus n tha re mo ch mu so is on Af ternoon tea in Lond sarnies WORDS SAMANTHA BADEN r ge fin d an s ke ca , es on sc of fix Grey. Get your

ea in a fine china cup, scones with clotted cream and jam, cucumber sandwiches, Victoria sponge, Bakewell tart and a glass or two of bubbly. What isn’t there to like about a proper English afternoon tea? Try these London tea rooms to get your fix.

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» Kensington Palace, Kensington

High St Kensington Gardens, W8 4PX (020 3166 6113; hrp.org.uk/ kensingtonpalace). Daily from midday until 6pm.

THE TEA ROOMS Lovely, friendly neighbourhood tea rooms in the London “village” of Stoke Newington. Tea time: Savoury finger sandwiches, scones with clotted cream and jam and three mini cakes. Plus a lovely pot of Earl Grey.

TNT Images

Genteel: The Oranger y

ORANGERY It’s hard to beat the incredible and dramatic Orangery in the middle of Kensington Gardens as a setting for a genteel high tea experience. Tea time: Flute of champagne, an assortment of finger sandwiches, orangescented scone with jam and cream, an eclair, and an orange and passionfruit tart. Plus a choice of tea or coffee. The damage: £20.45 per person. Basic

afternoon tea (without champagne) from £12.50 per person. Verdict: Not a hint of snootiness despite the relatively steep price tag. The special setting makes this an extremely pleasant way to spend an afternoon.

TEA TRIVIA

LONDON

• British people drink 165 million cups daily or 60.2 billion per year. • Per capita, The Republic of Ireland drinks the most tea worldwide, followed by Britain. • China produces the most tea in the world with 1,200,000 tonnes annually. India is second with 981,000 tonnes (2008 production). • Ninety-six per cent of tea consumption in Britain comes from a bag. • And 98 per cent is taken with milk.

SOURCE: The Tea Council

The damage: £12.50 per person. Verdict: Skip the pub and head here instead – it’s big enough to fit you all in and won’t break the bank.

» 155 Stoke Newington Church St,

N16 0UH Stoke Newington (020 7923 1870; thetearooms.org). Afternoon tea served on Saturday and Sunday from 2pm-5pm.

THE WOLSELEY From its chandelier-studded roof to its formally-clad waiters, the Wolseley oozes old world charm. Tea time: Finger sandwiches, fruit scones with clotted cream and strawberry jam and an assortment of delectable pastries. The damage: £21 or upgrade with a glass of delicious champagne for £29.75. Verdict: This art deco former motor showroom is a destination restaurant for a reason. The marble pillars and 1930s interior make it the perfect afternoon pit stop, albeit at special occasion prices.

» 160 Piccadilly, W1J 9EB Green Park (020 7499 6996; thewolseley.com). Afternoon tea from 3pm-6.30pm on weekdays; 3.30pm-5.30pm on Saturdays and 3.30pm-6.30pm on Sundays.

britainonview.com

DEAN STREET TOWNHOUSE This hip boutique hotel and restaurant, smack bang in the middle of Soho, is the new kid on the afternoon tea block. Tea time: Finger sandwiches stuffed with cucumber, egg mayo, and ham and mustard. Scones with jam and clotted cream (of course) and a very impressive plate of fancy cakes (battenberg, lemon and blueberry, chocolate). The damage: £15. Verdict: Perfect for a modern Soho afternoon out.

» Dean Street Townhouse, 69-71 Dean St, W1D 3SE Piccadilly Circus (0207 434 1775; deanstreettownhouse.com). Daily from 3pm-6pm.

Afternoon tea: Have your cake and eat it too

Manchester Sq, W1U 3BN Bond Street (020 7563 9505; thewallacerestaurant.co.uk). Daily from 3pm-4.30pm.

Old world charm: The Wolseley

WALLACE COLLECTION RESTAURANT Possibly one of London’s most beautiful and romantic dining rooms, the glassroofed cafe attached to the incredible Wallace Collection is a simply stunning place to unwind and indulge. Tea time: Peyton & Byrne run the dining room here so expect the highest quality food. There’s three afternoon teas to choose from. Cornish Cream Tea – finger sandwiches and scones; English Afternoon Tea – finger sandwiches, devilled Cromer crab on melba toast, plus scones and fancy cakes; or Parisian Afternoon Tea – foie gras, salmon tartare and goose rillette with melba toast plus a selection of French fancies and pastries. The damage: Cornish Cream Tea £12.50; English Afternoon Tea £17.50; Parisian Afternoon Tea £24.50. Verdict: For something different in beautiful surrounds, nothing beats the Wallace’s restaurant.

» Wallace Collection,

BEA’S OF BLOOMSBURY Glossy cupcakes, oozing chocolate cakes and buttery carrot cake compete for attention the minute you walk inside this small bakery and café in Bloomsbury. Tea time: Incredibly light scones smothered in jam and cream, berry marshmellow, mini meringue, mini brownies and blondies and magnificent strawberries-and-cream cupcakes. The damage: £9.90 per person or upgrade to include some savoury baguettes for an extra £3. Verdict: Bea’s turns out seriously good sweet treats and incredibly good prices. Skip lunch and dinner and come here instead, but maybe walk home afterwards.

» 44 Theobald Rd, WC1X 8NW Holborn (0207 242 8330; beasofbloomsbury.com). From 2.30pm on weekdays and from midday at weekends.

FOOD & DRINK

BAR REVIEW PRINCE EDWARD ★★★★★

LONDON

73 Princes Sq, W2 4NY 08721 077 077 Bayswater

THE SCENE In the backstreets of Bayswater, just around the corner from Westbourne Grove, this superior local nestles between posh apartment blocks. Either take a sofa in this

Shepherd’s Pie

comfortable, spacious venue or grab a long table if you’ve got a posse. Equally, outdoor tables provide a perfect vantage point on a nice afternoon. THE GRUB Typical pub fare, but well-executed. The menus are updated regularly, but they do a good line in burgers. If you want something fancy, go for the Kobe beef burger. BEHIND THE BAR A good

range of ales on tap, a solid selection of wines and it scores well on the all-important Bloody Mary litmus test. BILL PLEASE A feed and a few beers for under £20. VERDICT An unpretentious neighbourhood pub that delivers an environment and menu that’s a cut above your average corner boozer. TOM STURROCK

A Brit classic

It’s British Food Fortnight from September 18 to October 3. There’s no better time to cook up a classic Brit dish like Shepherd’s Pie – lamb mince with a mashed potato blanket – the ultimate comfort food.

5289S

WHAT YOU NEED: 500g lamb mince; 1 finely chopped, medium white onion; 50g peas; 50g diced, cooked carrots; 2 large Maris Piper potatoes; ½ litre reduced stock; 1 dessert spoon tomato puree; Worcestershire sauce. THE WORK: Sweat the chopped onion in a little vegetable oil until soft, but with no colour, then add the lamb mince and keep it moving until all the mince has browned. Stir in the tomato puree and simmer for a further five minutes then turn out into a colander to drain off the excess fat. Put the mince into a fresh pan, add the reduced stock

PLACES FOR A BRITISH MEAL St JOHN

and simmer for approximately 50 minutes, or until the mince is tender. Finish with salt, pepper and a splash of Worcestershire sauce to taste. Cook the Maris Pipers, drain and puree, finish with a little double cream and an egg yolk, salt and pepper.

Add the cooked, diced carrot and peas to the lamb mince, put into an ovenproof dish, cover with the mashed potato and bake in a medium oven for 20-30 minutes, or until the potato has browned up. » For more information on British Food Fortnight see lovebritishfood.co.uk.

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The Albion albioncaff.co.uk Go hard on the British revival menu at this Terence Conranowned, hip Shoreditch caff. Dig into fish pie and kedgeree. Easy on the wallet, too.

The Goring thegoring.com A “haven of correct behaviour”, this Buck Palace neighbour is serious about British food. It’s also a splurge so save up first.

TNT Images, Getty Images

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stjohnrestaurant.com A world famous champion of all things British, St John is the place for quality, seasonal, yet unstuffy fare. Expect hare, eel and chitterlings.

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SILLY BUGGERS

My boyfriend and I have been together for ages but lately it seems like it’s just hard work. I feel like the memory of happier times is all that’s keeping our relationship afloat. What should I do?

There are times when relationships, like people in comas, are just running on life support. You can keep them propped up, or you can make the more humane decision to suffocate them with their own pillow after slipping the nurse a C-note to look the other way. We all have fond memories

TOOL OF THE WEEK The ‘dick pic’ burglar

Success – be it personal or professional – can become a millstone. We spend the rest of our lives trying to measure up to it, even once the magic is gone. I achieved a cult following with my debut novel in the mid-1990s, The Unicorn Hunters – a 21stcentury technofable about how the internet is an alien conspiracy to enslave Secret cupboard mankind.

In 1997, Plug Magazine named me one of their 200 most exciting writers with a moustache and the future was pregnant with adulation. But the sequel – which revealed that the first book’s events only took place in the main character’s dream – fell flat and my fame withered. Late at night, once the mocking laughter has fallen silent, I still try to write. But the music has left my soul. I am barren. It’s time to give up, as it is for you.

» Got a sex or relationship dilemma? Email dearreuben@ tntmagazine.com

THINGS THE QUEEN SHOULD DO BEFORE SHE DIES

# 387

Silly Buggers™

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An Aussie burglar who made a habit of photographing his privates on stolen phones, and then sending the pics to his victims’ friends and family, was busted when police raided his house and recognised rooms from the pictures. One victim wound up in trouble at school when his year 11 mate reported him after receiving a lewd pic. When caught, the burglar said: “I’ve been off me head for a while … on drugs” and admitted “running amok”. It has to be said: small things amuse small minds.

of cherished relationships, but adult life is about moving on and tucking unhelpful memories deep down in a dark little recess of your mind; indeed, my Secret Cupboard of Shame and Regret is like one of those walk-in wardrobes on Cribs where the shoes go round and round on a conveyor belt. If you’re bored, your boyfriend is too. And that means he’s most likely cheating on you with some little skank. Ditch him before he gives you the clap.

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CELEBRITY NEWS

NEW ZEALAND

Inger Smith WITH THE LATEST FROM THE WORLD OF SHOWBIZ

Woman’s Weekly: Outrageous Fortune star Nicole Whippy talks about daughter Pearl; former Warriors star Awen Guttenbeil reveals his exciting birthday baby boy surprise; plus can the Queen keep the feuding royal family together?

DOGGY-STYLE: Aussie Idol runner-up Jessica Mauboy is doing very well for herself out in the big wide world, teaming up with Snoop Dogg on her new album. The rapper flew Mauboy out to LA to shoot the music video last week and the excited Burn-singer tweeted: “gona b filming with the BOSS DOGG:D hehe so nervous. I need to go get a pedicure if snoops gona b touching my feet.” Yeah, don’t want to have cheesy feet when the dogfather starts sniffing around. Not just a pretty face then Jess, but pretty tootsies too!

AUSTRALIA New Idea: Matthew Newton sees red – the jealousy row caught on camera; romance rumours flies as Alex Fevola, the former wife of footy star Brendan Fevola, checks into a hotel with her Dancing With The Stars partner Arsen Kishishian; Paul Hogan’s wife enjoys life in the Bahamas while he’s stuck in Oz with his tax debt.

SOUTH AFRICA

Ok, so It can be quite annoying when musicians get involved in politics (oh no, not that Bono again!), but Saffa band Freshlyground is taking a whole new approach to fight the injustice in the world.

Robert Mugabe did get an invite to appear in their latest video Chicken To Change but declined. Instead, the band teamed up with the puppets from satirical internet show ZA News, who dance along with the pop giants in a

choreographed chicken dance. “I loved interacting with the puppets and puppeteers. There was also something so incredibly refreshing about dealing with the serious subject matter of the President’s resistance to change in such a light and colourful way. Hopefully it still gets the message across clearly,” lead singer Zolani Mahola told ZA News. Yeah, we get ya Zolani. The big question is, will Mugabe?

SAY WHAT?

Katy Perry’s ultimate fantasy is a room full of pillows.

A BAD WEEK FOR

Bootylicious Beyonce has had to pay a five-figure sum for trespassing on someone’s driveway while shooting the video for Why Don’t You Love Me. Where’s the love, dude?

Need to send money between UK and home? r Cheapee than th banks*

*Source: 1st Contact survey of UK high street bank charges, April 2008.

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”I do steal pillows from every single place I stay”

A GOOD WEEK FOR

Hank The Tank aka Will Ferrell is promoting his very own sun lotion brand ‘Sexy Hot Tan’ by posing in skimpy red speedos on bottles of the stuff. But it is all for a good cause: funds go to cancer charity.

➩

Heat: Find out who’s the biggest and meanest bitch in the Idols house. This year’s contestants spill the beans; South African presenter Kuli Roberts is stuffing her boots with more than just her feet; and Elin Nordegren opens up about her divorce from Tiger. You: Beauty queen and TV drama star Sorisha Naidoo talks about her baby joy.

BAND PULLS STRINGS

➩

ENTERTAINMENT

STAR SPOTTING

TNT LIFE TAKE A LANGUAGE COURSE Planning a trip to foreign shores and want to be able to communicate with the locals while away? Then take a beginners course in Spanish, Italian or French with TNT and The Language Machine this autumn. The five-week intensive classes will enable you to converse in shops and restaurants, read signposts, ask for directions, order drinks, and find out more about the people you’ll meet, and their culture. Courses are only £75 and

include a fully-qualified tutor, a language pack, reading materials and refreshments.

» TNT offices, Child’s Pl, SW5 9SH Earl’s Court. Courses start Sep 22 and Sep 23. See tntmagazine.com/school.

TNT AFL GRAND FINAL PARTY online, or £1 on the door.

Wherever you’re headed this winter, visit the TNT Sun & Snow Show for some fantastic deals. Entry is free if you register

» Ibis Hotel, Earl’s Court, SW6 1UD West Brompton. Sat, Oct 16, 9.30am-6pm. See tnttravelshow.com/sunandsnow.

Just cos you’re in London, doesn’t mean you should miss out on the biggest Aussie sporting event of the year – the AFL Grand Final. Come and enjoy beers and hot Jumbuck’s pies while watching the game on the big screen with fellow AFL fans on September 25. Tickets are £10 and include a beer and a pie. » Elk Bar, Fulham Rd, SW6 5UB Fulham Broadway From 5am, Sat, Sep 25. See tntmagazine.com/afl.

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03/09/2010 13:48 tntmagazine.com

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LOOK WHO’S TALKING

Two years into retirement she remains the best woman pro surfer of all time, now works as a motivational speaker and is engaged to INXS’s Kirk Pengilly.

ENTERTAINMENT

Layne Beachley INTERVIEW ALISON GRINTER You’re a seven-time world title holder and best woman surfer in the world. Where do you get your drive?

Well, it took me 31 years to work out where I got my drive from and the thing I was able to break it down to was being adopted and feeling the need to prove my worth to the world, so I chose an auspicious goal as an eight-year-old to become a world champion. How has women’s surfing changed since you started in the 80s?

Exponentially, on so many different levels. It’s incredible where it is today. Increased support, increased visibility. It’s a lot more professional and there’s a lot more money in it …and I’m proud to have played some part in that.

I was told: “ ‘You’d better not become a dyke ” You once said growing up in Manly was ‘Blokesville’ – was that intimidating as a young grommet chick?

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Yes, it was somewhat intimidating … I was the only girl in the water; I was far from welcome at the best of times. I was very competitive, very tenacious, very ambitious and not shy of a challenge and I don’t think the guys knew how to take me – and I felt like I belonged anyway, as a tomboy. And, yeah, I guess I earned my stripes and paid my dues and copped the shit and learnt to give it back. On the professional circuit did the women surfers tend to be supportive of each other?

It was insanely emotional. It was challenging, there wasn’t much

support for the girls, therefore there was very little support given to each other. There were little factions and I remember the first thing the lifeguard said when I said I was going on a pro tour was: “You’d better not become a dyke.” I was like: “Is that the attitude people have towards women’s surfing?” You competed in an all-male event in 2004? How did you go?

Well, I came last. It turned into this enormous media-driven rivalry between myself and the current men’s world

champion Andy Irons. He [seemed to think] that I had no right to compete … Literally there were 20,000 people on the beach for a 20 minute heat. It was the biggest crowd you’d seen since the ’80s. You’re engaged to Kirk Pengilly of INXS – how did you two meet?

We were set up by a friend of mine – Jon Stevens, lead singer of Noiseworks who was touring with INXS for a few years … I took Kirk out on a date primarily out of obligation to Jon. And that first date was a disaster. Kirk felt it was necessary for him to start sharing his surfing stories with me and I was like: “For Christ’s sake.” It got to the point where I went to the bathroom looking for a window to climb out and he contemplated doing a runner … How did he react when you lost your 1.35 carat engagement ring in Sydney Harbour?

First he said: “I’m not buying you another one …” Then he said: “I’ll still marry you but I’m still not buying you another ring.” And then I told him: “I’m gonna hire a man with a metal detector” and he said: ”Don’t waste your time. You’ll never find it …” So we went out three days later and found it three inches under the sand.

» Layne Beachley is in the UK as an ambassador for Tourism NSW.

YOU DON’T SAY? What’s your karaoke tune? I’d probably sing something like When The War is Over by Cold Chisel. Biggest phobia? Rejection Tell us your guilty pleasure Hot chips with chicken salt and tomato sauce.

tntmagazine.com

CINEMA The Other Guys

SCREEN TEST:

Will Ferrell, Mark Wahlberg

ENTERTAINMENT

STARRING:

RT 102 MINUTES MINS

MARK WAHLBERG

★★★★★

With Bruce Willis stinker Cop Out still fresh in the memory, the thought of sitting through another Hollywood buddy cop comedy is enough to put anyone off their popcorn. Fortunately, The Other Guys is in a different class thanks to some clever casting. After badly losing his way with Land of the Lost, Ferrell returns to form as Allen Gamble, a policeman who handles the paperwork while supercops Danson and Highsmith (Dwayne Johnson and Samuel L Jackson) see all the action and get the glory. Assigned to desk duty alongside Gamble is partner Terry Hoitz (a pitch-perfect Wahlberg) who has become the butt of the department’s jokes after accidentally injuring a sports star. When the duo get a chance to hit the streets and fight crime things

1 What was the name of Wahlberg’s band in his earlier career as a rapper? 2 What was the profession of Wahlberg’s character, Eddie Adams, in Boogie Nights? 3 What was Wahlberg arrested for in 1988? 4 Who’s Wahlberg’s brother, and what’s his claim to fame? 5 Name three films that Wahlberg has starred in between 2000-2010.

go tits up at a rate of knots. Despite a so-so storyline the film is consistently funny thanks to excellent chemistry between Ferrell and Wahlberg. The support they receive is top class as well, with Michael Keaton sensational as the pair’s

captain and Eva Mendes stealing scenes as Gamble’s wife. Steve Coogan falls flat as the villain but this is still a much-needed shot in the arm for the buddy cop genre. GOOD FOR: Will Ferrell fans. PIERRE DE VILLIERS

THE REEL DEAL

3 Steven Spielberg and Sophia Loren 4 Gertie 5 Justin Long LAST WEEK’S WINNER Michael Mackinnon

I’M STILL HERE

★★★★★ Director Casey Affleck attempts to explain Joaquin Phoenix’s weird behaviour of late in a strange but compelling documentary that chronicles the actor’s attempts to become a rapper. Whether real or a piss-take, this is still a disturbing look at celebrity culture. GOOD FOR: Those who like celebs behaving badly. PDV

inspire positive changes in society. The movie adaptation of John Marsden’s best-selling novel Tomorrow, When The War Began has become an instant hit in Australia, bringing in A$3.86m in its first four days, and seizing the No.1 box office spot in Australia as well as New Zealand. Its success makes Stuart Beattie’s directing debut the third-biggest opening weekend for an Australian film after Happy Feet and Baz Luhrmann’s Australia. The film stars some of Australia’s finest young talent including Caitlin Stasey (Neighbours), and Phoebe Tonkin (Packed To The Rafters).

LAST WEEK’S ANSWERS 1 Flower Films 2 Ellen Page

WINTER’S BONE

★★★★★ Jennifer Lawrence puts in a staggeringly good performance as a teenager looking for her bail-jumping dad in Debra Granik’s superb drama. An enthralling rites-of-passage film that wisely takes its time to unfold, this marks the arrival of a prodigiously talented actress. GOOD FOR: Those who like slow-burning dramas. PDV

Macall Polay, Getty Images

Popular South African TVseries Hopeville has taken a giant leap onto the big screen as a 90 minute feature film. The show, which was screened on SABC 2 in 2009, has been nominated for best drama and mini-series at global television awards Rose d’Or in Lucerne, Switzerland, and with most of South Africa’s acting elite on board for the film version, including Desmond Dube (Hotel Rwanda), Tsotsi’s Terry Pheto (pictured), Jonathan Pienaar (Blood Diamond) and Paul Luckhoff (Stander), Hopeville continues to

For a chance to win a copy of Beyond The Rave, starring Nora-Jane Noone and Jamie Dornan, out on DVD on Sep 13, email answers to grabs@ tntmagazine. com by noon on Wed with ‘Beyond’ in the subject line.

WIN

CULTURE IAN MCKEEVER RA The Royal Academy of Arts has launched a new programme of exhibitions focusing on the work of their contemporary Royal Academicians. British artist Ian McKeever opens the Artists’ Laboratory series with Hartgrove, a display of five large paintings. After leaving London in 1992, McKeever was inspired by the openness and light of Dorset. This is the first chance to see the intimate photos McKeever developed in his dark room. Each of the 40 black and white pictures represents his passion for light and shadow

ENTERTAINMENT

SEE THIS: Exhibition – whether it’s a stack of teacups drying in the sun or the reflections off a pair of curtains. The most impressive quality of McKeever’s work is how his photography contrasts beautifully and elegantly with his abstract paintings. JO TILLEY

» Royal Academy of Arts,

Burlington House, W1J 0BD Piccadilly Circus (royalacademy.org.uk). Until October 24. £3

TNT online For more reviews of events in London go to tntmagazine.com/londonlife

WORTH A LOOK David Bate: Australian Picnic features the photographs of cities and the bush to create awareness of globalisation » London Gallery West, University of Westminster, HA1 3TP

Waterloo (tate.org.uk). Sep 30-Jan 16. £13.50

THEATRE OF THE WEEK

BOOKS OUT THIS WEEK

CLYBOURNE PARK

OUR KIND OF TRAITOR

JUMP!

John le Carre

(Bantam Press) SEP 16

(Viking) SEP 16

A young Oxford academic and his girlfriend uncover – via a dodgy Russian millionaire they meet on holiday – an unholy alliance between the City of London and Britain’s

Capricious owners, obsessive trainers, gallant stable lads and lasses, tough jockeys and thoroughbred racehorses: yep, it’s another horsey, titillating, rural romp from the queen of posh chick-lit.

TENDER: VOLUME II

THE KILL ZONE

Nigel Slater

Chris Ryan

(Fourth Estate) SEP 16

(Headline Books) SEP 16

Following his guide to the veggie patch, Britain’s celebrated foodie offers up his definitive guide to cooking with fruit, featuring over 300 recipes from chutneys and jams to cakes and pastries.

A novel from exSAS hard-man Chris Ryan. When three deadly Stinger missiles go missing in Helmand Province, Afghanistan, an SAS team lead by Jack Harker is tasked to find them at all costs.

★★★★★

Bruce Norris’s sharp, succinct and lethally funny satire is full of surprises – from cartoonish beginnings with a white Chicago housewife packing up their home as her husband sits dejected in his pyjamas, to a 50-year leap to 2009 when the location is the same but the neighbourhood is now

Royal Academy of Arts, Johan Persson

•Make a date with

Northwick Park (westminster.ac.uk). Sep 24-Oct 28. Free

French post-impressionism for Gauguin: Maker of Myth » Tate Modern, Bankside SE1 9TG

predominantly and proudly black. Top performances from the cast ensures every nuance of prejudice, sadness and disgraceful behaviour hits home. LOUISE KINGSLEY

» Royal Court Theatre, SW1W 8AS Sloane Square (020 7565 5000: royalcourttheatre.com). Until October 2. From £10

Jilly Cooper

MORE THEATRE Set in small-town America This Is How It

Goes is a darkly comic play » Old Kings Head, Upper Street, N1 1QN

•See Oikus at a theatre

Angel (0844 477 1000) Until Oct 3. From £12

made entirely from recycled materials » Jellyfish Theatre, Union St, SE1 1LB

Borough (oikusproject.com). Until Sep 18. £13

tntmagazine.com

MUSIC

MUSIC & CLUBS

ALBUM OF THE WEEK

GRINDERMAN Grinderman 2 (Mute)

FAST FORWARD

★★★★★

If Grinderman’s first album captured four men in the throes of mid-life crises then Grinderman 2 is them getting their mojos back. Firstly, G2 is thematically broader than their debut: love, sex, death and billabongs all get a look in here. And by putting The Bad Seeds on the back burner once more, the sounds unleashed are richer

and more textured. Songs like Worm Tamer, with its scarifying guitars and serpentine melodies, are imbued with the sort of malign foreboding that Nick Cave and Warren Ellis bottled on their soundtrack for bleak, end-of-the-world flick The Road;

Evil is punctuated by furious blasts of bouzouki while Bellringer Blues shimmers with hallucinatory waves of sound. Absolutely awesome. ALISON GRINTER See page 26 for our Grinderman interview

INTERPOL

LINKIN PARK

WAI

Interpol (Soft Limit) Our last chance to hear Carlos D’s dramatic basslines. He quit the ‘Pol post-LP earlier this year.

A Thousand Suns (Warner Bros.) The hit-spawning, California numetallers return with their Rick Rubin-produced fourth outing.

Ora (Andy Childs) Sophomore LP from acclaimed NZ group who draw heavily on their ancient Maori roots.

ALSO OUT

MUSIC NEWS

Amid rumours Cold Chisel could soon be back in the studio for the first time in a decade, frontman Jimmy Barnes’ new solo album Rage And Ruin has debuted at number three on the Aussie albums chart.

CHARTS

A record breaking nine Aussie festivals were winners of this year’s Greener Festival Awards for promoting environmentally friendly practices and sustainability on the festival circuit. Winners include Bluesfest and Womadelaide but NSW’s Peats Ridge Festival topped the honours, winning the Outstanding Award. UK Festivals to win included Glastonbury, Standon Calling and the Isle of Wight Festival. The awards were launched in 2007 by agreenerfestival. com to promote greener music festivals.

Australian rock veterans INXS will headline this year’s AFL Grand Final entertainment on September 25. The band will be fronted by Canadian singer J.D Fortune, (below) who publicly split from the band in 2009. He was invited back into the INXS fold earlier this year.

NEW ZEALAND

SOUTH AFRICA

No 1 single Dynamite, Taio Cruz No 1 album Teenage Dream, Katy Perry

No 1 single Teenage Dream, Katy Perry No 1 album Asylum, Disturbed

No 1 single We Speak No Americano, Yolanda Be Cool No 1 album Now That’s What I Call Music 55, Various Artists

No 1 single Please Don’t Let Me Go, Olly Murs No 1 album Teenage Dream, Katy Perry

tntmagazine.com

(0844 477 1000). £27.50 Guns N’ Roses The O2, Oct 13 (0844 477 5775). £51-£56 Hoodoo Gurus Shepherds Bush Empire, Oct 3 (0844 477 2000). £19.50 Klaxons Forum, Nov 16 (0844 277 4321). £21 Hugh Masekela and The Mahotella Queens Royal Festival Hall, Nov 12 (0871 663 2501). £10-£27.50 Pendulum Wembley Arena, Dec 3 (0844 815 0815). £25 The Parlotones Shepherds Bush Empire (0844 477 2000). Nov 25. £14 Mark Ronson Hackney Empire, Sep 29 (020 8985 2424). £20-£25 Stereophonics Hammersmith Apollo, Oct 17-18 (0844 277 4321). £33 Shapeshifter Shepherds Bush Empire, Oct 29 (0844 477 2000). £17.50 Tame Impala Heaven, Oct 28 (0844 811 0051). £12.50 Xavier Rudd & Izintaba Shepherds Bush Empire, Dec 6 (0844 477 2000). £18.50

Getty Images

AUSTRALIA

Airbourne Brixton Academy, Dec 2 (0844 477 2000). £17.50 Arcade Fire The O2, Dec 1 (0844 856 0202). £30 Sarah Blasko Electric Ballroom, Nov 17 (0870 264 3333). £12.50 The Cat Empire Brixton Academy, Oct 23 (0844 477 2000). £19.50 Gorillaz The O2, Nov 14-16 (0844 277 4321). £45 Grinderman Hammersmith Apollo, Oct 1 (0844 844 4748). £25-£27 The Coronet, Oct 2

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CHAOS

THEORY TNT chats to Grinderman about their stunning new album WORDS ALISON GRINTER

f ever a band had earned the right to rest on their considerable laurels, then Nick Cave and The Bad Seeds were it. In 2004 they released Lyre of Orpheus/ Abattoir Blues with many critics calling it their best yet. But when Cave, and core members Warren Ellis, Martyn Casey and Jim Sclavunos regrouped in 2007 it was not to make another Bad Seeds album of carefully crafted ballads as expected. Rather, Cave picked up a guitar for the first time, the quartet hit the studio for a week of spontaneous improvisation – and all hell broke loose. Grinderman was born in a crossfire hurricane of squalling guitars and X-rated lyricism and overgrown facial hair. But no one was more surprised than Grinderman themselves.

‘SOME SORT OF BAND’ ”Grinderman is sort of a chaotic disturbance in that world – it’s an unexpected development and introduces an element of pure chaos,” drawls Sclavunos in his New York accent. Cave saunters in (“Has the interview started?”) eating custard cream ice-cream. The Fu Manchu moustache he sported for Grinderman’s self-titled debut is gone. He looks buff and healthy. What is interesting is how Grinderman led The Bad Seeds astray; their subsequent album Dig Lazurus Dig!!! absorbed Grinderman’s malign influence. “There’s definitely a lingering resonance of the thing that’s gone before,” says Sclavunos. “It’s opened some new door or

tntmagazine.com

pandora’s box of possibilities.” But both are at pains to point out that Grinderman is an “an autonomous thing” and certainly not just a side-project. Grinderman’s arrival caused confusion all round, not least for their label Mute. “No-one knew if this was really going to be more,” says Cave. ”Now it appears that we’ve turned into some sort of band.” They’ve noticed young kids coming to Text symbol: Kylie

their gigs. Cave chortles: “They’re probably in their mid-forties – and just look good.” As ever, Cave can’t help being a smart-arse – when asked about reports that he is writing the screenplay for a remake of The Crow he says mock-sharply: “I’m here to talk about Grinderman. Let me write that on a napkin: ‘Fuck off I’m here to talk about Grinderman!’”

MUSIC & CLUBS 27

A real love of rock and roll: Nick Cave

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I think there’s a lot of great stuff to come out of Australia – it’s not like the hall of fame is just full of shit – just half full of shit.”

BACK WITH A VENGEANCE Ok, then. Grinderman 2 is a concept album built around a loose narrative which will be revealed, drip-feed style, via videos and album artwork. “It’s a bit like Emerson Lake & Palmer talking about Tarkus,” Cave says of the overblown prog-rock classic. Songs like Worm Tamer and Heathen Child are classic Grinderman, all furious mayhem and sexual menace. But Palaces Of Montezuma seems to recall The Bad Seeds’ lush balladry. “It’s quite a bit sunnier than Bad Seeds’ balladry,” Sclavunos refutes. Cave adds: “It served as some kind of relief from the onslaught. The Bad Seeds

have always had a problem with pop stuff anyway. And whenever we tried to do something good natured and fun to listen to the saboteurs in us would kick in and it would turn into an unlistenable fiasco … within Grinderman, there is, despite what people think, a kind of much more tempering down of irony within the music. There is just a real love of rock and roll.” Though he’s lived in Brighton for donkey’s, Cave is considered a legend in his birth country and in 2007 was inducted into the Aria Hall of Fame. “I’m in with good company,” he says “Marcia Hines, AC/DC … So you know you can kind of sneer at these things but

NICK’S WILD ROSE The conversation turns to pop music. “I’ve got Kylie’s Mighty Aphrodite but I haven’t listened to it yet,” Cave says. Will he and Kylie ever perform a duet again? “I’d love to – maybe a Wild Roses Grow redux,” Cave chuckles. “Except that would be a bit like when Russell Crowe rang me and said: ‘Could you write Gladiator 2?’ And I was like: ‘Doesn’t he die in the end?’ and he goes: ‘Yes. Sort that out!’” “I dunno if that would happen but, I love Kylie,” he says softly, almost to himself., before adding suddenly: “We’re actually friends” Does he see her much? “Not a lot – we text … I’ve never seen anyone text with as many exclamation marks!”

» Grinderman 2 out now on Mute. See page 24 for TNT’s review.

HAVE YOUR SAY! Vote for your favourite at tntmagazine.com/twpa

The shortlists for the 20th annual TNT Travel Writing And Photography Awards have been selected by our panel of judges, and voting for the Readers’ Choice has now opened.

The

th Annual Travel Writing & Photography Awards

VOTE ONLINE TO DECIDE WHO WINS In association with

The winner of the Readers’ Choice Award for Photography will receive an Olympus EPL1 with Double Zoom Kit and retro camera bag. The winner of the Readers’ Choice Award for Travel Writing gets to take home two Busabout Flexitrip travel passes.

Winners will be announced at the TNT Sun and Snow Travel Show on October 16. tntmagazine.com

MUSIC

GIG GUIDE MUSIC & CLUBS

Alison Grinter PICKS OUT THIS WEEK’S BEST LIVE MUSIC

GIG OF THE WEEK JIMI HENDRIX 40TH ANNIVERSARY GIG Poor Jimi. His friends knew the game was up when he stopped carrying his guitar everywhere with him, even to the toilet. Sadly drugs replaced axe as his main muse and he went on to became a founding member of the infamous “27 club”. The guitar demi-god played his last ever show at Ronnie Scott’s 40 years ago this week so it’s fitting the venue should stage these tribute gigs to be performed by violin virtuoso Nigel Kennedy and friends. Whether Kennedy will set his fiddle alight or play it with his teeth is anyone’s guess …

» Ronnie Scott’s, 47 Frith St, W1D 4HT (020 7439 0747; ronniescotts.co.uk) Leicester Square. Sep 17-18. £35-£55. WILCO + PHILIP SELWAY

UNDERWORLD

Chicago alt.country sextet Wilco return to London off the back of their beautiful, breezy, eponymous album. Support comes from Radiohead drummer Philip Selway, whose solo debut Familial reveals him to be a songwriter of fragile acoustica filigreed with glitchy effects.

20 years on from their seminal beginnings, Brit electro duo Karl Hyde and Rick Smith continue to make the kind of dance music that is as hypnotic as it is euphoric. Their latest LP Barking featured a roll call of guest producers including Paul van Dyk and Appleblim.

» Royal Festival Hall, SE1 8XX

Waterloo (0871 663 2501; southbankcentre.co.uk). Tues, Sep 14. £25-£37

NEW BAND ALERT

» Forum, 9-17 Highgate Rd, NW5 1JY

Kentish Town (0844 847 2405; venues.meanfiddler.com). Thurs, Sep 16. £25

FESTIVAL WATCH Earlybird tickets on sale for 2011 Leeds/Reading festivals Get in early for your indierock fi x. The line-up is TBC. Reading/Leeds. Aug 26-28, (seetickets.com). Weekend ticket £180

Ramona

Getty Images

THE BUZZ SO FAR If they’re not named after Frank Black’s glorious

paean to The Ramones, I Heard Ramona Sing then they damned well should be. Using driving ‘70s punk riffs as their starting point, the Brighton quartet, fronted by the sultry Karen Anne, nevertheless trade in the kind of radio-friendly rock-lite tunes that wouldn’t be out of place on a teen flick soundtrack. WHAT ELSE? Their debut single Steve McQueen is an ode to the actor’s sizeable, er, appendage. THE PLUG Proud Camden, Chalk Farm Rd NW1 8AH Chalk Farm (proudcamden.com). Wed, Sep 22. £4

V Festival V have 2011 tickets on sale for 2010 prices. Line up TBC. Chelmsford/Staffordshire. (vfestival2011tickets.com). Aug 20-21, Weekend tickets £165 Benicassim Discounted tickets are now on sale. Line up TBC. Benicassim, Spain (fiberfib.com). July 14-17, 4 day tickets £125

Lounge On The Farm Take advantage of the boutique fest’s early deposit scheme. Acts TBC. Merton Farm, Canterbury (loungeonthe farm.co.uk). Jul 8-11. £85 for weekend Camp Bestival Bestival’s sister festy always boasts a great line up. Lulworth Castle, Dorset (campbestival.net). Jul 29-31, Weekend tickets £155 Secret Garden Party Tickets are now on sale for the special price of £125. Mill Hill Field, Cambridgeshire (uk.secretgardenparty.com). Jul 21-24. £125 Earlybird tickets for T In The Park 2011 have sold out ... … So beware of bogus websites. Balado, Kinross, (tinthepark.com). Jul 8-10

tntmagazine.com

CLUBBING

MUSIC & CLUBS

CLUB GUIDE

Natasha Vuckovic PICKS OUT THIS WEEK’S BEST CLUB NIGHTS

CLUB OF THE WEEK MINISTRY OF SOUND 19TH BIRTHDAY Ministry of Sound heads into its final teenage year this week and the club is not going to let the celebration pass by quietly. As usual, The Gallery is in charge of Friday night and it has lined up a corking four-hour set with tranceman Ferry Corsten (pictured). The birthday festivities continue on Saturday as US house star Danny Tenaglia ups the set-time ante with a colossal eight hours on the decks.

» Ministry of Sound, 103 Gaunt St, SE1 6DP

Elephant & Castle (0870 060 0010; ministryofsound.com). Fri, Sep 17, 10.30pm-6am. £15. Sat, Sep 18, 10pm-8am. £20 adv

beats/breaks

funk/soul

BODYMOVE SUMMER SESSION CLOSING PARTY Is it really time to kiss the warmer months goodbye? Guests for this include Big Brother 3 winner and regular Ibiza spinner Kate Lawler, and Anil Chalwa, who’s steadily been carving out a name for himself on the club scene with some wicked house beats. Sayonara, summer.

» Egg, 200 York Way, N7 9AP King’s Cross (020 7609 8364; egglondon.net). Sat, Sep 18, 10pm-6am. £15

drum ’n’ bass

electro

hip-hop

JADED For after-hours mayhem, check out Jaded’s special guest, Tim Sheridan. If his set is anything like his now defunct NastyDirtySexMusic parties, you won’t be able to sit down all night. Meanwhile, Jaded regular Raymundo Rodriguez will, as always, be shunning daylight to deliver beats to party-hungry people.

» Cable, Bermondsey St Tunnel, SE1 3JW London Bridge (cable-london.com). Sun, Sep 19, 4am-11am. £5 adv

We have a pair of tickets to give away to see Ferry Corsten at The Gallery during Ministry of Sound’s 19th Birthday weekend to give away. To enter, email grabs@tntmagazine.com with ‘Ferry Corsten’ in the subject line by noon, Wed, Sep 16.

A Swedish House Mafia (pictured) flick is set to hit our screens. Having been filmed for the past two years, Steve Angello, Sebastian Ingrosso and Axwell describe the fly-on-the-wall film as a mix between a documentary and a comedy. They told Radio 1’s Zane Lowe it features the making of their smash hit single, One, “and me slating the bass-line saying it sounds like Lambada,” Axwell revealed. Meanwhile, new single Miami 2 Ibiza featuring UK rapper Tinie Tempah is out now. Deadmau5 is heading to the UK for a winter tour. It kicks off on September 8 in Bournemouth

OWD N EAVE CITY CR H @ CAPA NDAY Y MO M MIXED R FTER. E B V E & RN AD, £8 A IL 6A £2.90 E T C M N DA 11P THIS NKS USE, WITH T DRI E ) MOS MS OF HO IDNIGHT ERVIC OR PAYSLIP T!! ND S O IGH M (W/ID N O ID) A S 4 L H R R L B IT E 4 Y ORK TS (W TRY A ENTR UDEN DUSTRY W T FREE EN FREE LL ST E N

tntmagazine.com

rock/metal

techno

CLUB NEWS

EN. HEAV St. WC2. nt s r e li il nkme V mba E : e Tub

house/garage

with following shows booked for Leeds, Manchester, Coventry and Glasgow before wrapping up in London at Earl’s Court on December 18. The line-up includes names such as Calvin Harris, Zane Lowe and Stanton Warriors.

Rogier Jaarsma

WIN

hard house/trance

GU tiny ESTLIS u po pc rl.comT: orn gue / stlis t

CLUB LISTINGS MONDAY 13

St, WC1A 1JJ (020 7240 1083). 9pm-3am. £5, w/flyer £3.

Explosive DJ Rugrat spins R’n’B, funky house, hip-hop, party and club classics. Zoo Bar, Bear St, WC2H 7AQ (020 7839 4188). 10pm3am. Gents £10, ladies £7, gents £7 before 10.30pm, ladies guestlist £5.

Hard Core Salsa DJ Mario plays mambo and salsa. Salsa!, Charing Cross Rd, WC2H 0JG (020 7379 3277). 7pm-late. £4, free before 9pm.

Everybody Dance Resident DJs David and Andrew spin dance, club classics and 1970s disco. Up The Creek, Creek Rd, SE10 9SW (020 8858 4581). 11pm-2am. £8, w/flyer £4.

TOOLROOM KNIGHTS 4TH BIRTHDAY Ministry of Sound SE1 6DP Elephant & Castle (0870 060 0010, ministryofsound.com). Oct 2. From £15 Mark Knight’s great label produces some damn fine house music. The head honcho himself celebrates four years of Toolroom with a seven-hour set.

Feeling Gloomy Leonard and Cliff spin melancholy pop and indie. Islington Academy, N1 Centre, Parkfield St, N1 0PS (0844 477 2000). 10.30pm-3.30am. £8, £6 before midnight, NUS £5, adv £4.50.

How Does It Feel To Be Loved? Ian Watson’s night of indie, girl-group classics and soul. The Phoenix, Cavendish Sq, W1G 0PP (020 7493 8003). 9pm-3am. £6, mems £4.

Inferno Andrew Elmore spins funk, house and dance.

I Love Mondays DJ Victor spins commercial dance, disco, pop, garage, R’n’B and funky house. Moonlighting, Greek St, W1D 4DR (020 7287 372). 10pm-3.30am. £5, NUS £1.

Mad Monday’s Resident DJs play chart and party classics. Verve, Upper St Martin’s Ln, WC2H 9NY (020 7395 1200). 9pm-3am. £3-£7, guestlist free before 11pm, free before 10pm.

Vodka Island Funky electro, house and chart courtesy of the residents. Tiger Tiger, Haymarket, SW1Y 4SP (020 7930 1885). 9pm-3am. £6, £5 before 10pm.

Diff’rent Strokes DJs Phat Cat,

Latin Krazy Salsa,

Zay London, Lonyo and MOBO Award winner and Kiss FM DJ Manny Norte play neo soul, 1980s pop, US house, funk and R’n’B. Cherryjam, Porchester

merengue, bachata and reggaeton. Salsa!, Charing Cross

Rd, W2 6ET (020 7727 9950). 9pm-late. £10, £5 before 11pm.

N*A*S*I*N SoniX, Brahim

Oh! Inverted World GoldHeart Assembly (DJ set) and residents spin indie, pop and electro, plus Les Cadets perform live. The Old

and Punk Gareth play punk, rock, metal and ska. The

Queen’s Head, Essex Rd, N1 8LN (020 7354 9993). 7.30pm-1am. £5.

Borderline, Orange Yard, Manette St, W1D 4JB (0870 060 3777/ cc 0871 231 0842). 11pm-3am. £5, w/flyer £4, NUS £3, mems £2.

Rd, WC2H 0JG (020 7379 3277). 7.30pm-late. £4, free before 9pm.

Psyrhythmix DJs spin psychedelic trance. Club 414, Coldharbour Ln, SW9 8LF (020 7924 9322). 11pm-6am. £5, £3 before midnight.

Shadow Boxer Andrew

TUESDAY 14

Elmore spins 1980s dance and pop classics. The Shadow

Roller Disco Funk and

Festa Fiesta Latin and samba

Lounge, Brewer St, W1F 0RF (020 7287 7988). 10pm-3am. £5, free before 11pm, mems/guestlist free.

Renaissance Rooms, Arches, Miles St, SW8 1RZ (0844 736 5375). 8pmmidnight. £10, w/skates £7.50, NUS £5.

Trannyshack Miss Dusty O,

Smash & Grab Queens Of

Tasty Tim and Lady Lloyd spin commercial dance and pop. Madame Jo Jo’s,

Noize, Don’t Run With Scissors, Girls In The Pub DJs, Barmisfits and Moody Beaches spin indie, electro, disco and pop. XOYO,

from the resident DJs, plus salsa classes before 10pm. Fiesta Havana, Fulham Rd, SW6 5NH (020 7381 5005). 7pm-2am. £6.

Lost In London Party on the ground floor, electro-house in the basement and commercial R’n’B in the VIP room. Zoo Bar, Bear St, WC2H 7AQ (020 7839 4188). 7.30pm-3am. £7, guestlist/NUS £5.

Panic! Max, Gaz and That Perfect Fumble play indie and post-punk. The Roxy, Rathbone Pl, W1T 1HJ (020 7255 1098). 10pm-3am. £5, NUS/w/flyer £3.

Replay Diego CK, Anto and Steve Nocerino play deep house. The Den & Centro, West Central St, WC1A 1JJ (020 7240 1083). 11pm-7am. £10, ladies £5.

Talking At Me Lixo, My Panda

Brewer St, W1F 0SE (020 7734 3040). 10pm-3am. £5, w/flyer £3.

WC2H 7AQ (020 7839 4188). 9pm-3am. £7, NUS/guestlist £5.

THURSDAY 16 Addiction Resident DJs play R’n’B, reggae, funk, garage and hip-hop. Rumba, Shaftesbury Ave, W1D 7EP (020 7287 2715). 9pm-3am. £10, £5 before 11pm.

Shall Fly and Rita Maia play soul, electro and pop, plus Sampha, Phantom and Alpines perform live. Notting Hill Arts Club, Notting

Boom Boom Club Rock ’n’ roll cabaret from host Dusty Limits, and burlesque from Miss Vicky Butterfly. The Bathhouse,

Hill Gate, W11 3JQ (020 7460 4459). 7pm-2am. £6, free before 8pm.

Bishopsgate Churchyard, EC2M 3TJ (020 7920 9207). 7.30pm-late. £25, adv £7.

White Heat DJs Matty, Marcus and Olly play indie, punk, techno and electro. Madame Jo Jo’s,

Credit Crunch Thursdays

Brewer St, W1F 0SE (020 7734 3040). 10.30pm-3am. £6, adv £5.

WEDNESDAY 15 Agita Brasil Latin and samba from the resident DJs, plus dance classes before 10pm. Fiesta Havana, Fulham Rd, SW6 5NH (020 7381 5005). 7pm-2am. £6.

disco for a wheeled audience.

Cowper St, EC2A 4AP (0844 41 45 978). 10.30pm-3am. £5 & £8.

Wicked Wednezdayz Resident DJs play chart, party anthems and R’n’B. Zoo Bar, Bear St,

Victor V and Hitman play reggae, soul and R’n’B. Orleans, Seven Sisters Rd, N4 2HZ (020 7281 0611). 10.30pmlate. £4.99, £2.99 before 12.30am.

Your Mum’s House Scally Dandan and Jamie D Winter spin electro and fidget house. Punk, Soho St, W1D 3DN (020 7734 4004). 9pm-3am. £5, £3 before 11pm.

FRIDAY 17 Anthem Marc Andrews, Sean Sirrs and Andy Almighty play dance classics, soul and funk, plus Angie Brown performs live.

Frolic DJ StevieF spins party, retro pop and cheese. Crazy Larry’s, King’s Rd, SW10 0TZ (020 7376 5555). 10pm-3am. £10, guestlist £5 before midnight, guestlist free before 11pm.

With Scissors and Easy Lover play indie and electro. The Bathhouse, Bishopsgate Churchyard, EC2M 3TJ (020 7920 9207). 11pm-5am. £10, £5 before midnight.

Minibloco DJ Patrick plays hip-hop, soul and Brazilian beats.

Great Newport St, WC2H 7JA (020 7240 1551). 9pm-3am. £10, guestlist £5, free before 9pm.

Brewer St, W1F 0RF (020 7287 7988). 10pm-3am. £5, free before 11pm, mems/guests free.

Dance Rocks House, R’n’B, chart, indie and 1980s and 1990s hits. The Watershed, The Broadway, SW19 1SD (020 8540 0080). 8pm-late. £8, £5 before midnight.

5PG (020 7831 9399). 10pm-3am. £15, guestlist £10 before 11.30pm.

On The Real Diamond D,

Greek St, W1D 4DR (020 7287 372). 9pm-3.30am. £6, NUS £5, w/flyer £4.

Watershed, The Broadway, SW19 1SD (020 8540 0080). 11pm3am. £8, £7 before midnight.

Rd, SW9 4AY (020 7733 0926). 10.30pm-4am. £10, adv £5.

Unbranded DJs Howie and

Strictly Business The Muzik

Perry play commercial dance and R’n’B. Crazy Larry’s, King’s Rd,

Mafia DJs spin urban and Latin sounds, including upfront R’n’B, hip-hop, 1980s and 1990s soul, reggaeton and soulful house. Traffic, Vernon Pl, WC1A 2EP (020 3206 0011). 10pm-3am. £10.

Underground Kings Frank Nitt, Tanya Morgan, Spin Doctor and DJ Snuff play hip-hop. Plan B, Brixton Rd, SW9 4AY (020 7733 0926). 7.30pm-10.30pm. £12, adv £7.50.

The Dogstar, Coldharbour Ln, SW9 8LQ (020 7733 7515). 7pm-4am. £5, free before 10pm.

Black Rabbit Disco Bloodbath,

SW10 0TZ (020 7376 5555). 10pm3am. £10, guestlist £5 before 11pm.

Wig Out Tommy Turntables, Lady Lloyd and Prince Nelly play indie, pop, R’n’B and Motown. The Den & Centro, West Central St, WC1A 1JJ (020 7240 1083). 10pm-2.30am. £7, £5 before 11pm.

SUNDAY 19 Groove Sanctuary AfricanLatin, electronica, funk, disco and deep house from DJ Jimbo (Raw Deal), Joey Vieira and guests. Madame Jo Jo’s, Brewer St, W1F 0SE (020 7734 3040). 9.30pm-3am. £5, free before 11pm.

Horse Meat Disco Jim Stanton, James Hillard, Filthy Luka and Severino spin disco.

Damon Martin, Guy Williams and Bones play house and techno. Cargo, Rivington St,

Eagle, Kennington Ln, SE11 5QY (020 7793 0903). 8pm-3am. £6.

EC2A 3AY (020 7739 3440). 10pm-3am. £10, free before 10pm.

Secret Sundaze Nina Kravitz, Giles Smith and James Priestly supply deep house, disco house and techno. The Ministry

Carpet Burn Jonny Woo, Ma Butcher, Princess Julia and John Sizzle play pop, dance, house and Italo disco. Eagle, Kennington Ln, SE11 5QY (020 7793 0903). 9pm4am. £6, NUS £4, £3 before 10.30pm.

Of Sound, Gaunt St, SE1 6DP (0870 060 2666). 2pm-10.30pm. £10, £6 before 6pm, free before 3pm.

1960s pop, soul and rock ’n’

Tape Rossko, Never Trust DJs, Claudia Lovisa and Raimo spin tech-house, deep house and minimal techno.

roll. Buffalo Bar, Upper St, N1 1RU (020 7359 6191). 9pm-4am. £6.

Platinum, Paul St, EC2A 4JU (020 7638 4601). 10pm-5am. £10.

Cave Club Rhys Webb plays

Submit your free listing at least three weeks prior to the publication by emailing clubs@pressassociation.com.

Saints & Sinners Daniel Scott plays club classics, while resident DJs play indie and pop in the bar. The

Spin Doctor, DJ MK and DJ 279 play hip-hop. Plan B, Brixton

Cheapskates Old school hiphop, electro and disco courtesy of DJ Downfall. Moonlighting,

Arts Club, Notting Hill Gate, W11 3JQ (020 7460 4459). 7pm-2am. £8, £6 before 10pm.

People, Curtain Rd, EC2A 3QE (020 7739 6471). 10.30pm-4am. £7.

G, Supa Mann and Xavier Miller play R’n’B, hip-hop and funky house. Tamarai, Drury Ln, WC2B

Audio Sushi Indie, electro, breaks, house, drum ’n’ bass and hip-hop from DJ Disastronaut.

soul. Salvador And Amanda,

Muevete! Cal Jader, Tio Chango, Kid Watusi and Don Chicarron play Latin beats, electro and funk. Notting Hill

Mode PR DJs VG, Shock, Bennie

Bloody Awful Poetry DJs spin

Calentito Pop, R’n’B, and

Cross Rd, WC2H 0JG (020 7379 3277). 7pm-2am. £10, £8 before 11pm, £4 before 9pm, £2 before 8pm.

Nonsense Benny Blanco, Judah and Mr Wonderful play techno and electro. Plastic

SATURDAY 18

Camden, The Horse Hospital, Chalk Farm Rd, NW1 8AH (020 7482 3867). 7.30pm-2.30am. £10, £8 before 9pm, w/flyer £5 before 9pm.

Latin Fever Latin tracks from resident DJ Jorge. Salsa!, Charing

Guanabara, Parker St, WC2B 5PW (020 7242 8600). 5pm-late. £10.

Royal Vauxhall Tavern, Kennington Ln, SE11 5HY (020 7820 1222). 9pm-5am. £8, adv £6.

indie, electro and rock. Proud

The Shadow Lounge, Brewer St, W1F 0RF (020 7287 7988). 10pm3am. £10, free before 11pm.

Love To Love DJs Don’t Run

Glitz & Glamour DJ Mark Bambach plays house, R’n’B and dance. The Shadow Lounge,

MUSIC & CLUBS

Bite DJs Lydia, Ian, Marcus and Peta spin electro, indie, disco, dubstep, hip-hop and pop. The Den & Centro, West Central

TNT’S TOP BOOKING

tntmagazine.com

news & sport

NEWS IN REVIEW

The week that was MONDAY

» TUESDAY » WEDNESDAY » THURSDAY » FRIDAY » SATURDAY » SUNDAY quote unquote “I felt these sharp pains when something stuck into my back. I took the top off and found all these pins had been stuck into it.” Miss Australia Jesinta Cambpell claimed another Miss Universe contestant lined her national dress – made from swimmers and a flamenco dress, worn with high-heeled Uggs – with pins.

wrap up of last week’s events from australia, new zealand and south africa

AUSTRALIA Swingers sentenced Mario Schembri, 58, and Bernadette Denny, 42, – the swingers who killed millionaire Herman Rockefeller, were sentenced to prison for nine and seven years respectively. The pair pleaded guilty to the manslaughter in January of Rockefeller, 51, who they said hit his head on the floor after a scuffle when Rockefeller showed up alone at their Melbourne home requesting sex.

Paddle power: Two boys and their dogs paddle in the flood waters in the northern Victorian town of Myrtleford. Wild storms lashed the state, triggering landslides, knocking out power supplies and forcing hundreds of people out of their homes.

Ministry rejected

Minister Julia Gillard’s offer of a regional affairs ministry. Oakeshott felt it would be difficult for someone “thorny” like him to make get any reforms through parliament.

Jaguar also withdrew its sponsorship after Rice tweeted, ‘suck on that faggots. Probs the best game I’ve ever seen!! Well done boys’.

Rob Oakeshott, the Independent MP for Lynne, rejected Prime

Rice contrite

Rob Oakeshott

Australian swimmer Stephanie Rice made a teary public apology for her “huge error of language and judgement” after gay activists reacted angrily over a tweet she sent about the Wallabies’ TriNations win over the Springboks. Channel 7 said it would not renew its partnership with the Olympic swimmer, worth $800,000 over two years and

The widow of the latest soldier to be killed in Afghanistan gave birth to his son just hours after his funeral. Just hours after paying tribute to Lance Corporal Jared MacKinney, 28, who was killed in late August during an intense three-hour battle with Taliban insurgents, Beckie gave birth to his son, Noah Jared MacKinney.

Soldier dies, son born

*And finally … ladies only

tntmagazine.com

items alongside the wine. With women accounting for 40 per cent of Australian business travellers, security was heightened with secure access elevator keycards to the floor and even the staff are women. “A lot of ladies travell alone, often in unfamiliar cities without good knowledge of the area,” hotel owner Georgie Woods said.

“A 5cm-long nail went into her face just above her eyeball.” A paramedic described the situation she found when attending to a 41year-old woman who shot herself in the head with a nail gun. “Every morning it was the same thing – eat, eat, eat.” Australian schoolgirl Samantha Stacey, 16, was banned from sumo wrestling after she escaped from Tottoki Johoku high school in Japan, where she was plied with greasy porridge, eggs and meat. TNT er h weat rt repo

Avg min Avg max

Adelaide

Brisbane

Darwin

Canberra

Fifth floor: girl power

Hobart

Melbourne

Perth

Sydney

Getty Images, TNT Images

Men have been banned from an entire floor at a Brisbane hotel in order to improve the safety of an increasing number of women who travelled for business. On the fifth floor, or the ‘Ladies Only’ level of the Porta Hotel in Spring Hill, a pamper bar replaced the mini bar and the rooms were stocked with beauty products and other indulgent

“I don’t intend to be gracious at all to him.” Ousted West Australian Liberal MP Wilson Tuckey won’t feign niceties to National’s MP, Tony Crook, the man who unseated him.

What’s happening across the country

SUMMARY

■ Julia Gillard remains Australia’s prime minister after securing the backing of three independents and a Greens MP. ■ Labor forms a minority government with 76 seats against the Coalition’s 74. ■ Tony Abbott promises to hold Gillard to account.

QUEENSLAND Elite police officers were allowed to return to work after they were disciplined for taking an off-duty nude romp around their police minibus in the middle of a Brisbane intersection. The extent of the discipline was unknown.

ulia Gillard clung on to power as Australia’s first female prime minister after two independent MPs agreed to prop up a minority Labor government to resolve the country’s closest election in 70 years. “Let’s turn back the curtains and let the sunshine in,” Ms Gillard said, as she pledged to deliver a secure and effective government that would be held “more accountable than ever before”. The new federal parliament

TASMANIA

Julia Gillard narrowly returned to power

is now made up of Labor with with 76 seats – backed by Greens MP Adam Bandt and three independents, Andrew Wilkie, Tony Windsor and Rob Oakeshott – and the Tony Abbott-led Liberal-National Coalition with 74 seats, including WA Nationals member Tony Crook and Queensland MP Bob Katter.

More than a fortnight after Australia went to the polls, independent MPs Windsor and Oakeshott were able to negotiate $10bn in spending on rural projects in return for their support. A disappointed Tony Abbott, leader of the Coalition, promised to hold Gillard “ferociously” to account.

Getty Images

Abbott allies issue warning Tony Abbott was warned to tone down his venomous attacks on the new government and its backers, as Greens members and independents gave him the opportunity to govern from opposition. Greens leader Bob Brown raised the potential of passing the Coalition’s generous paid parental leave scheme, which would be funded by a levy on big business rather than ordinary taxpayers, despite Labor’s opposition to the idea. Brown also mooted possible policy deals on mental health, dental care and biosecurity, as well as suggesting weekly

COAST TO COAST

policy meetings with Abbott, as he would have with Prime Minister Julia Gillard. “They need to lay off on the role, as they see it, as wreckers,” said Brown in response to Abbott’s labelling of the new government as “illegitimate”. Backing Brown, independent MP Tony Windsor added, “They can do things with us and the executive won’t have the power to shut them down.” Despite the reassurances, the mining tax was squarely within the opposition’s sights as it prepared to seize on Windsor’s and treasurer Wayne Swan’s differences on the issue.

Tourism chiefs shelved plans to film an episode of the UK survival show Man vs. Wild because it did not fit in with Tasmania’s ‘brand’. Filmed by the Discovery Channel and SBS, the programme drops Bear Grylls, a former British Special Forces soldier, into a remote location to forage and fend for himself.

NEW SOUTH WALES Parliament will hold a conscience vote on a proposal to recognise the rights of parents with surrogate children. If passed, the law would ban commercial surrogacy but allow gay couples to use surrogates to have their children.

WESTERN AUSTRALIA

Abbott: told to rein it in

A research project in which 587 mums from two Perth hospitals recorded everything their babies ate in one year found that 91.6 per cent were fed biscuits and cakes, 78 per cent hot chips and 68 per cent ice cream before turning one – a crucial period in creating eating habits.

tntmagazine.com

NEWS & SPORT

Gillard does deal

AUSTRALIA

NEW ZEALAND

The week that was

news & sport

MONDAY

» TUESDAY » WEDNESDAY » THURSDAY » FRIDAY » SATURDAY » SUNDAY

Blackmailer caught A jilted lover blackmailed a married man into paying her nearly a quarter of a million dollars after threatening to disclose their affair to his wife. Sharleen Lynch, from Hamilton, confessed her offending to police in February this year. In total, the man whose name was suppressed, paid Lynch $246,375. She was now paying that back at $20 a week, the Waikato Times reported. For nearly five years the victim refinanced his mortgage, took out loans and drew on credit cards to pay demands from $75 to $7500.

Not so funny, Maurice Building minister Maurice Williamson’s jokes about Muslims caused outrage, but PM John Key shrugged them off as nothing more than humour that backfired. Williamson was reported as saying in a speech at an awards ceremony: “What is the difference between Muslims and Kiwis? Muslims get to commit

Speed in km/h a car was travelling when Hawkes Bay millionaire merchant banker Sam Kelt launched a “flying kung-fu kick” at it. Kelt was convicted for disorderly behaviour and discharged. All downhill from here: Jason Waters, of the USA, competes in the Export 33 Extreme Ski Challenge at Whakapapa, Ruapehu. Competitors pick their own lines in steep terrain, and are judged on their skill, finesse and tricks. The event is a qualifier for the elite World Freeride Tour and features $80,000 in prize money.

adultery and get stoned, Kiwis get stoned and commit adultery.” He also used the names of Muslim denominations to make a joke about the weather: “Shiite in the morning and Sunni in the afternoon”. Key was unconcerned: “In the last 12 months he’s managed to cause offence to the Jews and the Arabs, so it’s one-all at this stage,” he said.

New Zealand had failed to adequately look after its foster children, the United Nations Children’s Fund (Unicef), found. Unicef’s John Angus urged the

government to step up its game after it was found that many of the country’s 5200 children in care were being shifted from one caregiver to another and their general condition had declined.

Teachers do it tough New Zealand teachers were still paid far less than their Australian counterparts. An OECD report, Education at a Glance 2010, compared the education systems of 29 countries and showed a NZ primary school teacher with 15 years experience earnt $52,871 but an Australian teacher, with the same experience, earnt $63,447.

Number of roast chickens it took to distract Christchurch guard dog Shady while burglars robbed his family’s home of all its electronic equipment.

The age Mica, Hamilton’s favourite clown, was when he died after a short battle with brain cancer. Mica, and his performing poodles, were regulars at private and public events throughout the Waikato for more than two decades.

2050

TNT er h weat rt repo

Bargain-hunting

Avg min Avg max

Auckland

Wellington

Christchurch

Dunedin

NZPA / Malcolm Pullman, Getty Images

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Among the more quirky items for sale were broken plates and dishes, which were being auctioned for use in mosaics, and “earthquake sand” for sandpits. T-shirt retailer Mr Vintage created a benefit T-shirt, with $5 from each T-shirt and jumper sold going directly to the Red Cross to assist with the quake clean-up.

The year academic Dr Rangi Mataamua warned the Maori language would die out if plans were not put in place now to keep it alive.

*And finally … rubble for sale It didn’t take long for earthquake entrepreneurs to cash in. By the end of last week a 30cm by 40cm chunk of tarseal from the quake’s epicentre in Highfield Rd, Darfield, was already for sale, the bid standing at $3. The proceeds would go to Red Cross. The item was one of many on TradeMe.co.nz as people looked to raise money from the big shake.

40k

Amount in dollars an Auckland man and his company were fined for importing fake Rugby World Cup merchandise.

NZ fails foster children

Maurice Williamson

WEEK IN NUMBERS

Aftershocks continue

UPPER NORTH ISLAND Police officers allegedly watched as two youths were filmed doing a humiliating dance by homeowners who accused them of vandalising their fence with graffiti. The officers from Whangarei were under investigation over their conduct, as thousands of people viewed the clip on YouTube.

A solider helps with the clean-up

the strongest of the 270 that had struck since as it was closer to the city centre and shallower. But the largest may be yet to come, according to Jennifer Coppola of state-funded science agency GNS Science. “The rule of thumb is that the largest aftershock should be expected to be about one order of magnitude below the

main quake, so about six,” she told Reuters. Christchurch Mayor Bob Parker said the “unpredictable” situation was a setback to rebuilding efforts which were estimated at a cost of $4bn. Hundreds of people were displaced and more were out of work as a result of homes and buildings being uprooted.

Getty Images

Wilce lies lead to shake-up New Zealand’s defence chief Lieutenant General Jerry Mateparae was forced to concede that job and securityvetting procedures for public servants needed a shake-up after the resignation of an employee over his wildly exaggerated CV. An anonymous tip-off that Defence Technology Agency head Stephen Wilce lied about having a distinguished combat career, among other claims, sparked an inquiry that has continued since July, Mateparae confirmed. In a report for TV3’s 60 Minutes programme, Wilce

also told a reporter posing as a recruitment consultant that he was a member of the British Olympic bobsleigh team. Wilce resigned after the programme, which alleged his claims were false, was aired. Mateparae refused to reveal to a parliamentary committee what the investigation had found but he described it as a “serious employment issue”. It follows a scandal involving former Immigration Service chief Mary Anne Thompson, who admitted lying about having a doctorate from the London School of Economics.

LOWER NORTH ISLAND Seven students from the exclusive Scots College in Wellington were accused of being involved in an illicit drugs ring. The students, who were dobbed in by their classmates, were told to leave the school while another five were suspended.

UPPER SOUTH ISLAND Drinkers were warned of a dry spell after the earthquake closed down bars and destroyed liquor distribution centres. Brewery Lion Nathan lost 70 per cent of its liquor at two distribution centres, while its Canterbury Draught brewery was knocked out.

LOWER SOUTH ISLAND A four-level penguinviewing platform will be built on the Otago Peninsula, where up to 50 people at a time can watch the penguins come ashore at dusk. The Pukekura Trust was behind the $400,000 venture.

tntmagazine.com

NEWS & SPORT

■ Earthquake-hit Christchurch suffers hundreds of aftershocks, cutting off power and closing a major highway. ■ Experts say the worst could still be to come. ■ Cost of the city’s major 7.1 magnitude earthquake is estimated at $4bn.

Mateparae: change in order

COAST TO COAST What’s happening across the country

SUMMARY

state of emergency was extended for an extra week in Christchurch as sharp aftershocks rattled the earthquake-ravaged city. Residents were warned to brace for more tremors in the coming months after a magnitude 5.1 aftershock on Tuesday evening cut off power and closed a major highway to the port town of Lyttelton. Although it was not the largest aftershock since the previous weekend’s devastating 7.1 magnitude quake, it felt like

NEW ZEALAND

SOUTH AFRICA

The week that was

news & sport

MONDAY

» TUESDAY » WEDNESDAY » THURSDAY » FRIDAY » SATURDAY » SUNDAY

Mountains tabled

Bees sting unravels

Death rate in decline The country’s murder rate declined by 8.6 per cent last year to its lowest level since apartheid.

Staring at the sea: A South African Muslim attempts to spot the new moon that would mark the end of the fasting month of Ramadan and the start of the Eid al Fitr celebrations. The Sea Point promenade in Cape Town (pictured) hosted an evening prayer.

The number of murders fell to 16,834 over the past year from 26,877 in 1995-96. There was also a 10.4 percent drop in street robberies and a 6.8 per cent decline in carjackings, which was put down to greater police visibility. Home robberies, however, rose 1.9 per cent. Police Minister Nathi Mthethwa singled out the murder rate. “Of all the crimes, this is the one category you cannot easily cheat.”

Strike action over

Nathi Mthethwa

Most of the country’s 1.3 million striking state workers returned to work despite union leaders failing to persuade them to

accept a new wage deal. Leaders of the country’s largest union federation Cosatu warned mass action could resume in 21 days. However, it’s widely believed its members would settle for the government’s 7.5 per cent wage increase, even though they had held out for an 8.6 per cent rise.

Life hots up for Chippy Police confirmed they were investigating leads into a bribe between a German arms dealer and Shamim “Chippy” Shaik, South Africa’s chief of acquisitions at the time of the suspected deal in 1998.

*And finally … a numbers game

tntmagazine.com

pending further consultations. The nearly four million vehicles registered in Gauteng would eventually sport new aluminium number plates with the new sequence composed of two letters of the alphabet, starting with BB, followed by two numbers, another two letters and then GP, which was the abbreviation for the province.

Days that Allen Matsila, a senior manager of South Africa’s roads and traffic, was suspended pending investigations into allegations he accepted money to admit students to Manenu Traffic College.

Percentage wage increase for all parliamentary workers after members of the branch of the National Education, Health and Allied Workers’ Union staged week-long lunchtime pickets.

Percentage of South Africa’s population with undiagnosed tuberculosis, the leading cause of illness and death in patients with HIV. A recent medical report called for more intensive screening.

TNT er h weat rt repo

New plates for Gauteng

Avg min Avg max

Johannesburg 10

Pretoria

Cape Town

Durban

East London 15

Bloemfontein 8

Port Elizabeth 14

SAPA, Getty Images

New number plates could be rolled out to Gauteng motorists from December because the old system had run out of numbers. There would be a roll call of car owners in order to distribute new number plates, worth R350 a set, but initial plans for them to contain an “intelligence” chip holding information on the vehicle owner were on hold

Years since an updated Zulu dictionary was published, despite being one of South Africa’s most widelyspoken languages Oxford’s new ZuluEnglish dictionary hit stores last week.

Cape Town had the most overweight population in the country, a survey found. With 72 per cent of its residents overweight, obese or morbidly obese, it beat Pretoria (68) and Johannesburg (59) to the dubious title. GlaxoSmithKline surveyed 500 people for the research.

Vusi Ntloko, 29, from Mamelodi, was alleged to have picked up and immediately used credit cards belonging to Blue Bull Bees Roux on the morning the rugby player was accused of killing Tshwane police officer Sergeant Johannes Mogale. Transactions that happened within minutes of each other at different locations suggested Ntloko, who was to be charged with theft and fraud, had help on his spending spree.

WEEK IN NUMBERS

Leap jumps ahead

WESTERN CAPE

‘Leap’ schools spell good news

trained, unaccountable teachers. “Why aren’t parents screaming about the appalling state of public education,” said Ann Bernstein, head of Johannesburg’s Centre for Development and Enterprise. The centre researched the growth in teachers, parents and philanthropists setting up private schools mainly

for poor, black children. There are three Leap schools in South Africa – two in Cape Town and one in Jo’burg, founded by John Gilmore, a former headmaster of a mostly white high school. Most of the annual R29,000 cost per student is raised privately, with the government contributing R6000.

Getty Images, Gallo Images

Media controls ‘not good news’ The world’s four biggest news agencies joined the public condemnation of South African President Jacob Zuma’s plans for tighter media controls. Agence France-Presse, the Associated Press, Bloomberg and Reuters expressed their concern that proposals for a media tribunal and a bill that would restrict media access to government documents would restrict their work. “The media in South Africa and foreign reporters working in the country told the world about apartheid, despite intimidation, attempts at censorship and attacks by

the government,” the agencies wrote in a public letter to Zuma. “We add our voices to those defending press freedom and freedom of expression in South Africa and worldwide.” Meanwhile, Sunday Times journalist Mzilikazi wa Afrika, was preparing to sue over his arrest for an article he wrote about a questionable lease approved by national commissioner Bheki Cele. Charges of fraud and forgery were dropped, but he believed the manner in which he was detained warranted a case for defamation and wrongful arrest.

A Cape Town priest was arrested with his son for assaulting his neighbour, whose wife he was allegedly trying to have an affair with. Retail worker Lindikhaya Mpehle, from the Samora Machel informal settlement, claimed he was beaten without provocation. It came after Mpehle’s wife revealed the priest had repeatedly proposed to her.

GAUTENG Bakers who fleeced their customers by charging full price for underweight bread could have their profits withdrawn, the National Regulator for Compulsory Specifications warned. It came after Bread For You in Wellington was found selling bread between 429g and 398g at a 600g price.

EASTERN CAPE Members of the National Union of Metalworkers of SA marched in Port Elizabeth to demand a 15 per cent pay rise. The union previously rejected a 10 per cent offer. General Motors SA had to shut down its Isuzu KB line due to the strike.

FREE STATE A collision between a minibus taxi and a truck in Bloemfontein claimed 13 lives. The victims, who were passengers in the taxi, died on impact.

tntmagazine.com

NEWS & SPORT

■ Black underprivileged Leap school students outperform public pupils. ■ Experts condemn statefunded schools with poorly trained teachers. ■ Philanthropists, teachers and parents responsible for a budding movement of private schools.

Furious over arrest: Wa Afrika

COAST TO COAST What’s happening across the country

SUMMARY

tudents of Leap schools, a model of private school for teenagers from black townships, far outperformed the average results of public school students in their matriculation exams. Nine out of 10 passed their exams over the past five years, and most went on to higher education, according to a report in the New York Times. This compared with only six out of 10 public school students passing their exams last year – mainly attributed to poorly-

SOUTH AFRICA

Sporting week MONDAY

AFL Collingwood midfielder Dane Swan is announced as the AFL’s MVP, as voted by the league’s players. Swan’s win breaks Gary Ablett’s streak of three consecutive wins.

TUESDAY

RUGBY LEAGUE Sydney Roosters half-back Todd Carney wins the Dally M Medal, capping a remarkable return after being sacked by Canberra over his drinking and playing grade rugby last year.

WEDNESDAY

AFL The career of Brisbane Lions forward Brendan Fevola hangs by a thread, with police investigating allegations he exposed himself to a woman in a park on the weekend.

THURSDAY

RUGBY LEAGUE Sydney Roosters sack two young players, Sam Brunton and Anthony Gelling, for defecating all over their hotel rooms. Incredibly, the club insists booze was not involved.

FRIDAY

RUGBY UNION Wallabies fly-half Quade Cooper re-signs with the ARU for one more year, ending speculation the 22-year-old could cross over to rugby league. For now, anyway.

SATURDAY

RUGBY UNION At the conclusion of the TriNations series, Wallabies coach Robbie Deans is adamant his side have improved, but concedes New Zealand will take some catching.

SUNDAY

ON BOX THE

MONDAY CRICKET Warriors v Victoria T20 Champions League 4.15pm British Eurosport 2

ON THE

BOX

TUESDAY FOOTBALL Man United v Rangers Champions League action 7.45pm Sky Sports 2

ON THE

BOX

WEDNESDAY FOOTBALL MSK Zilina v Chelsea More European football 7.45pm Sky Sports 2

BOX

CRICKET Kiwi batsman Jesse Ryder will make his comeback to the national cricket team during next month’s tour to Bangladesh. Hopefully he stays off the booze.

THE

I’m not “ homophobic at all and I have a lot of gay friends

”

Aussie swimmer Stephanie Rice after some ill-judged ‘homophobic tweeting’

THURSDAY FOOTBALL Salzburg v Man City Early days in Europa League 5.30pm ESPN FRIDAY CRICKET South Australia v Bangalore It’s a packed T20 fixture 4.20pm British Eurosport 2 SATURDAY FOOTBALL Sunderland v Arsenal Tricky one for the Gunners 4.45pm ESPN SUNDAY FOOTBALL Man United v Liverpool United will be fired up 1.30pm Sky Sports 1

PUB TALK: BRITISH SPORT EXPLAINED

Getty Images

Houllier to Aston Villa What’s his story? Houllier managed RC Lens and Paris St-Germain in the 1980s, before taking over the French national team. He resigned, though, when France failed to qualify for the 1994 World Cup. He then took over at Liverpool, where he was in charge for six years.

How will he fare at Villa? He inherits a depleted squad and his club’s owners are unlikely to match the spending of their main rivals. Houllier has said he rates Villa as between 8th and 12th in the League, which ignores the fact Villa have finished 6th for three years running.

tntmagazine.com

NEWS & SPORT

Tom Sturrock picks his winners and losers

RUGBY Brad Thorne celebrates

NEWS & SPORT

You’ve only “ got to look at the numbers to see they’re smart. Good luck to them

”

Wallabies coach Robbie Deans admires the All Blacks, a team whose players he nurtured.

THE PLAYER

Richie McCaw

ABs display grit Australia 22 A Ashley-Cooper J O’Connor tries M Giteau 3 pens K Beale pens

23 New Zealand K Read, R McCaw tries P Weepu 3 pens 2 cons

The All Blacks conjured a come-from-behind win to become the first team to complete a six-game Tri-Nations sweep and in doing so extended their winning run to 15 Tests. Coming off a lengthy break, and with five changes to their starting line-up, New Zealand lacked rhythm in most parts of their game. They kicked too much and their handling was poor at times, with five errors to the Wallabies’ none in the first 25 minutes. There was also some sloppy defence, which allowed James O’Connor to scoot over after 15 minutes. However, coach Graham Henry will be pleased his team held their nerve after being

down 19-6 with 30 minutes to play, to score tries firstly to Richie McCaw on 67 minutes and then to Kieran Read, after a series of a pick-and-goes, with seven minutes to play. The Wallabies, to their credit, put in their best showing of the season. They kicked well, competed strongly at the breakdown and, for most of the match, were resolute in defence. Adam Ashley-Cooper showed his class in beating three All Blacks to score and give his team its best chance of beating the New Zealanders for the first time in 10 games. Skipper David Pocock led from the front all night but ultimately, the Wallabies lack of killer instinct was their undoing. Both teams will now focus on their respective end-of-the-year tours to the UK and Europe.

NEW ZEALAND The All Blacks’ display of physical prowess and mental strength to secure the win was inspired by their fearless leader. It was a great way for McCaw to break Sean Fitzpatrick’s NZ captaincy record – he now has 52 Tests in charge, with only six losses. He was sublime in the second half, scoring a try, tackling his heart out and hitting the ruck with that familiar disregard for his body’s limits.

THE TABLE Team

New Zealand Australia South Africa

W 6 2 1

L 0 4 5

BP PD PTS 3 73 27 2 -24 11 3 -47 7

Nonu: Bring it on, SBW

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lot of second-fives in New Zealand and you just have to play well all the time.” Williams stepped his game up a level in Canterbury’s 27-23 win over Northland at the weekend with a hand in all three of his team’s tries. All match, he attacked the line with venom, executed perfect offloads and showed impressive awareness and timing – including delivering a flick pass in the tackle to create a crucial try. Williams’ confident game will please All Blacks coach Graham Henry, who revealed he is keeping a close eye on the powerful utility.

Sonny Bill Williams

Getty Images

Sonny Bill Williams has been given the stamp of approval by Ma’a Nonu, the man whose All Blacks position he wants to take. “People think he’s got to prove something to the rugby world. He’s basically got to prove nothing. He’s been a superstar in league and I think he can adapt easily to rugby,” Nonu told stuff.co.nz. The rampaging Nonu is going through a purple patch of form for the All Blacks and said he welcomed the challenge from Williams. “It’s good for the game and for players who want to play to their best,” he said. “There are a

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GR AND FINAL Saturday, September 25 Doors open at 5am

£10 GETS YOU Ó Entry into Elk Bar to watch the AFL Grand Final

Ó Jumbuck’s pie Ó Drink voucher Ó Drink specials

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WEEK ONE

The Tigers “ owned us in

NRL Anthony Minichiello gets held up

NEWS & SPORT

the first half and my guys just hung in there … we had a bit of luck in the game

”

Roosters coach Brian Smith on his side’s epic win of the Tigers.

Roosters win classic

THE PLAYER

Mark Gasnier DRAGONS The Dragons has long promised to deliver but have a history of falling short. Buth with Gasnier back from his sabbatical playing union in France, this has to be the year for the Dragons. They started cautiously against Manly, but when Gasnier bolted over late on, it was party-time.

We’ve “ fought to get ourselves in this position and and I don’t think we’re going to let it go lightly

”

Getty Images

Raiders coach David Furner thinks his side can go deep.

Week 2 games

Raiders v Tigers, Roosters v Panthers

Tigers 15 B Ayshford B Ryan L Tuqiri tries B Marshall goal R Farah field goal

19 Roosters B Anasta S Kenny-Dowall M Pearce tries T Carney 3 goals B Anasta field goa

Sydney Roosters won a stunning qualifying final 19-15 in golden point in a match that lasted 100 minutes before Shaun KennyDowall’s 60-metre run, from an interception, sealed a famous win. However, the Tigers will wonder how they Titans 28 W Zillman 2 K Gordon M Rogers C Toopi tries S Prince 4 goals

16 Warriors A Heremaia M Vatuvei J Moon tries J Maloney 2 goals

Willie Zillman grabbed a try-scoring double to help the Titans snatch a 22-6 half-time lead and pulled off a remarkable diving effort to regain possession ahead of flying winger Kevin Gordon’s match-winning 65th-minute try. The Titans blew the deficit out to 24-6 with a Scott Panthers 22 S Earl 2 M Gordon 2 tries M Gordon 3 goals

24 Raiders T Campese B Harrison D Tilse R Robinson tries J Croker 4 goals

Canberra will live to fight another day after hanging on for a nail-biting upset win against Penrith. In a four-tries-apiece affair, it was a miss by the competition’s leading goalkicker Michael Gordon which proved the difference. The Raiders, though, were arguably the Dragons 28 M Cooper 2 M Gasnier B Hornby tries J Soward 6 goals

0 Sea Eagles

Despite facing a vastly understrength Eagles outfit, the Dragons refused to take any risks for much of the match, four penalty goals helping set up a 14-0 lead. It wasn’t until the 65th minute that they let their hair down and Matt Cooper scored after

lost a game they dominated for the opening 55 minutes before letting the Todd Carneyinspired Roosters back into the contest. Braith Anasta’s monster 35-metre field goal from just inside the left touchline took the game into golden point - for the first time in finals history - and after both sides missed two field goal attempts, Kenny-Dowall pounced to seal a magnificent fightback. Prince penalty goal in the 46th minute, bringing the 27,026-strong crowd to their feet. But the hosts didn’t have it all their own way, enduring some nervous moments when the Warriors cut the deficit to 24-16 through Joel Moon and Manu Vatuvei. However, Gordon crashed down the sideline for his 12th try of the season with 15 minutes still on the clock to guide the Titans home. better side, denied twice by forward passes and once controversially when inspirational captain Terry Campese’s brilliant run to the line was disallowed for obstruction. The Raiders led 18-12 at half-time and pulled further ahead when speedster Reece Robinson beat three cover defenders. Penrith winger Sandor Earl got his side back in the game with two spectacular tries, but the Raiders hung on. Mark Gasnier found space and popped a nice ball for a 20-0 lead. Cooper had a double just minutes later after Jamie Soward created something out of nothing on the last tackle. Then Gasnier sent the Kogarah crowd of 15,574 delirious when he fended off Kieran Foran to dash 80 metres, announcing the NRL’s so-called ‘chokers’ are free from their noose.

tntmagazine.com

AFL

WEEK TWO

I was go “ and go and

NEWS & SPORT

go until I fell over – I had a bit of a dog tonight, but I kept cracking

”

Outgoing Swans captain Brett Kirk was dogged to his last. He never lacked for effort.

Sydney’s Josh Kennedy tries to break free

Dogs sneak home Bulldogs 11.11.77 B Hall 4 D Giansiracusa 3 A Hooper D Addison J Grant R Murphy

10.12.72 Swans D Bradshaw 3 A Goodes 2 R Shaw 2 B McGlynn J Bolton L Jetta

The Bulldogs resuscitated their season with a thrilling five-point win over Sydney, dragging themselves back from 30 points down to book a third straight preliminary final berth. With coach Paul Roos and inspirational skipper Brett Kirk set to retire, the Swans appeared determined to keep them around for one more week at least when, following an even first term, they booted the first five goals of the second to take a commanding lead. But the Bulldogs, who have suffered a dramatic loss of form, as well as their share of untimely injuries, over the past month, dug deep. Goals to former Swan Barry Hall and Cats 20.15.135 J Podsiadly 3 S Johnson 3 M Stokes 3 D Wojcinski 2 C Ling B Ottens C Mooney J Bartel J Selwood P Chapman S Byrnes T Hawkins T Varcoe

10.6.66 Dockers M Pavlich 4 M Walters 3 C Mayne N Fyfe P Duffield

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for Fremantle – particularly in the midfield, where the likes of Gary Ablett, James Bartel, Joel Selwood, Paul Champan and James Kelly were simply too tough, too classy for their less battle-hardened opposition. Geelong supporters would also have welcomed the fine form of David Wojcinski, who cut the Dockers to ribbons with his runand-carry off half-back. The Cats’ routine victory set up a blockbuster preliminary final clash with Collingwood. Having met twice already this season, the honours are divided and Collingwood will be desperate for revenge, having been beaten by Geelong at this stage of the season in 2007 and 2009 – in both years, Geelong went on to win premiership the following week.

Barry Hall BULLDOGS In the past, the Bulldogs have often come undone in tight, unforgiving finals because of a lack of a key forward. This year, though, Barry Hall has given his side a target and his four goals in a low-scoring sudden-death final – against the Swans, who he co-captained to a flag in 2005 – underlined his usefulness to the Dogs once and for all.

We’ve got “ to have as much hatred for them as what they have for us

”

Cats coach Mark Thompson adds fuel to the fire. Hating the Magpies shouldn’t be too hard.

ON THE BOX FRIDAY 10.30am ESPN MAGPIES V CATS

Other Week 3 game Saints v Bulldogs

Getty Images

After losing by four points to St Kilda a week earlier, Geelong were expected to start strongly against Fremantle, to make a statement that, despite dropping their first final, the reigning premiers are well and truly still in the mix. Indeed, Geelong kicked the first five goals of the match and led by 48 points at quarter-time. And that was that. Fremantle never looked like getting back into the match and a final flurry from Geelong saw them add six goals in the final quarter and an exclamation point on their clinical return to the winners’ circle. Geelong simply had too many contributors

Andrew Hooper steadied the ship going into half-time before the Dogs ground their way on top in the third quarter, kicking three goals to none to leave the scores level at the last change. The final quarter was an arm-wrestle, but two goals to Bulldogs midfielder Daniel Giansiracusa, who had otherwise struggled to find the footy, proved crucial. The Bulldogs opened up a 13-point buffer midway through the term, before a goal to Lewis Jetta brought the Swans back within striking distance in the dying minutes. In the end, the Swans failed to take their chance as the clock wound down – star forward Adam Goodes had the chance to level the scores with a minute to play but the Bulldogs instead forced a rush behind.

THE PLAYER

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PREMIER LEAGUE Ji-Sung Park gets crowded by Everton’s midfielders

THE PLAYER

Cesc Fabregas

NEWS & SPORT

ARSENAL Among the three sides in genuine contention for this year’s title, it’s arguable that no player is as important to their team as Fabregas is to Arsenal. Indeed, the Spaniard, denied a move to Barcelona over the off-season, showed enough against Bolton to suggest his touch is returning. His vision and creativity were a feature throughout and he delivered Chamakh a perfect pass to give Arsenal the lead.

IN REVIEW

Everton stun United With Wayne Rooney spared the trip to Liverpool to face his old club, Manchester United started sluggishly against Everton before imposing themselves in the second half, only to concede two late goals that allowed Everton to snatch a draw. Stephen Pienaar put Everton ahead in the 39th minute, only for United to hit back four minutes later through Darren Fletcher. In the second half, Nemanja Vidic put United ahead and, when Dimitar Berbatov made it 3-1, it seemed a familiar tale had once again played out. Everton had other ideas though, with Tim Cahill and Mikel Arteta both scoring in stoppage-time to split the points.

Elsewhere, Arsenal shook off Bolton after half-time, with Marouana Chamakh, Alexandre Song and Carlos Vela all scoring in a 25-minute burst to get the Gunners home 4-1. Manchester City dropped points against Blackburn, drawing 1-1. Rovers’ Croatian striker Nikola Kalinic scored in the first half, before City veteran Patrick Vieira equalised. Certainly, City had their chances to take the three points, but some fine work from Blackburn keeper Paul Robinson was crucial. Another team vying for a top-four finish, Tottenham, also slipped up, drawing 1-1 away to West Bromwich Albion after Chris Brunt cancelled Luka Modric’s opening goal.

THE CHAT

Rooney’s form Amid the storm of publicity surrounding his trysts with a £1200-a-night prostitute, Rooney’s form for England has been pretty solid. But that’s not the only kind of form at issue. Rooney has form of another kind – in 2004, The Sun ran a story claiming Rooney was a regular client of a 52-year-old grandmother at a Liverpool brothel. The woman mentioned in the story sued The Sun for libel but had her case thrown out.

LOOKING AHEAD

Spurs set for Champions League debut With Tottenham set to make their first Champions League appearance, travelling to Werder Bremen on Tuesday night, their manager, Harry Redknapp, believes the English teams are now behind the Spanish giants in the pecking order. Redknapp said that even Manchester United and Chelsea, with their years of know-how, will find it hard to win the competition this season, making Barcelona and Jose Mourinho’s Real Madrid favourites. “If an English team win it this year, it will be a real feat,” he said. “The two Spanish teams look fantastic. If you look at the players they’ve brought in, it’s scary. But I’m looking forward to it. When you hear that music when the teams come out, it’s great, isn’t it?”

ON THE BOX MONDAY 7pm Sky Sports 1 STOKE CITY V ASTON VILLA

TUESDAY 7.45pm Sky Sports 2 MANCHESTER UNITED V RANGERS

TUESDAY 7.45pm Sky Sports 4 WERDER BREMEN V TOTTENHAM

WEDNESDAY 7.45pm ITV1 ARSENAL V BRAGA

WEDNESDAY 7.45pm Sky Sports 2 MSK ZILINA V CHELSEA

SATURDAY 12.45pm Sky Sports 2 STOKE CITY V WEST HAM

SATURDAY 4.45pm ESPN SUNDERLAND V ARSENAL

SUNDAY 1.30pm Sky Sports 1 MANCHESTER UNITED V LIVERPOOL

SUNDAY 4pm Sky Sports 1 CHELSEA V BLACKPOOL

Harry Redknapp

GENERAL

Boucher fires Warriors In the tournament’s opening match, South Africa’s Lions beat Mumbai Indians by nine runs after Jonathan Vandiar and Neil McKenzie both hit brutal half-centuries. Mumbai, despite contributions frm Sachin Tendulkar and JP Duminy, gave the chase a real shake, but fell just short. The other South African side in the tournament, the Warriors, also made a winning start, seeing off Sri Lankan side Wayamba. Chasing 153 from their 20 overs, the Warriors came flying home on the back of a hard-hitting partnership between Justin Kreusch and Mark Boucher. After NSW won the inaugural tournament last year, the Australian

Mark Boucher hits out

reprentatives, South Australia and Victoria, are both expected to produce strong showings. Certainly, South Australian paceman Shaun Tait expects conditions to favour fast and furious cricket. “I think the wickets usually offer quite a bit, and some of the grounds offer altitude, where the ball reportedly travels quicker through the air,” he said.

ON THE BOX MONDAY 4.15pm British Eurosport 2 WARRIORS V VICTORIA

TUESDAY 4.15pm British Eurosport 2 MUMBAI V SOUTH AUSTRALIA

WEDNESDAY 12.15pm British Eurosport 2

Getty Images

Ronaldo

“I pushed off the wall for the final 50m, and I felt it still there in my legs, and I knew I was going to win. About 20m from the wall, I took a big look both sides of me to see if anyone was there, and when no one was around me I began to laugh with my face there under the water.” Ian Thorpe on his gold medal in the 200m freestyle at the Sydney Olympics.

VICTORIA V CENTRAL STAGS

FRIDAY 4.20pm British urosport 2 SOUTH AUSTRALIA V BANGALORE

SATURDAY 12.20pm British Eurosport WARRIORS V CENTRAL STAGS

SATURDAY 4.45pm British Eurosport CHENNAI V VICTORIA

SUNDAY 12.20pm British Eurosport 2 LIONS V GUYANA

Heart hoping to lure Ronaldo Melbourne Heart, the newest side in Australia’s A-League, is reportedly in talks to sign Brazilian striker Ronaldo. The 33-year-old would be the A-League’s biggest name if Heart successfully pulls off the recruiting coup. Club chief executive Scott Munn on Friday night confirmed Heart was trying to lure the dual World Cup winner to Melbourne. “We’re in the embryonic stages at the moment,” Munn said. “We’re aware that his contract is nearing the end and we have had some contact and conversations with relation to Ronaldo and a possible stint

“Some of the stuff they write, they must have miserable lives themselves. You sit back and think gosh, what’s their life like?” Aussie golfer Greg Norman has a crack at the media. Boo-hiss.

WHERE’S HE BEEN?

“I said to myself, ‘So this is what it feels like to be an Olympic champion.’ I was overwhelmed. I remember thinking, ‘I don’t have to do anything again.’ It was a sweet end and a sweet beginning in the same breath.” Ten years on, Cathy Freeman (below) remembers that race at the Sydney Olympics.

Ronaldo has dipped off the radar of world football since his last full season in elite competition – that was 2005-06, when he was still at Real Madrid. He played two interrupted seasons for AC Milan and has been playing for Brazilian club Corinthians since early 2009.

with us. Ultimately the decision will rest with Ronaldo, our coach John van’t Schip and the football department.” Ronaldo would be expected to command a salary of about $100,000 a game.

tntmagazine.com

NEWS & SPORT

The second T20 Champions League is under way in South Africa, with domestic sides from around the cricketing world facing off for a £1.6m winners’ purse.

THE QUOTES

RAIDING

PARTY W

WORDS TOM STURROCK

to beat the Springboks (in a tour match) – it was a really amazing season”, says Ernst Joubert, Saracens’ South African number 8 and vice-captain. “With a new side, it can maybe be a little bit easier and sides will now know what to expect from us, but we don’t want to have any secondseason syndrome.”

THE SAFFA FACTOR Saracens importing of South African talent – the coach and chief executive are both Saffas and they drafted in a bunch of players at the start of last season – caused a stir in the English sporting press, with some commentators concerned the club was in danger of no longer being English. “There’s been a lot of controversy, a lot

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A winning vision: Saracens director of rugby Brendan Venter

ith the new English rugby season two weeks old, the jostling for supremacy has already begun. Most likely, though, by the time it all winds up in May, Saracens will have taken another step to establishing themselves as the competition’s emerging powerhouse. Long-consigned to mid-table mediocrity, Saracens have been remade in recent times with an influx of South African players and coaches – last season, it delivered spectacular results, the side going unbeaten for the first 10 rounds before losing to Leicester in a tense final. “To go all the way to the final – and

Ernst Joubert is one of the Saffas intent on Saracens success

NEWS & SPORT No prizes for second: Ernst Joubert wants the Premiership

it wasn’t going to happen,” he says. “I was at the Lions and wasn’t going anywhere, and had always wanted to play over here.” And the move has given Joubert a new lease of life – having recently turned 30, the back-rower is determined to make the most of his remaining time in elite competition. “I’ve loved it over here – it’s the most I’ve enjoyed rugby in a long time. It’s probably only for a few seasons and then I’ll end up back in South Africa at some stage.”

We’re not just “ a South African side over here ”

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said, because we’ve got lots of South Africans,” Joubert says. “Saracens used to sign a lot of big names and it didn’t really bring them any success, so there was a bit of scepticism to begin with.” “But we’re just another side in the Premiership – there are a lot of foreign players here anyway, and if sides want to build their depth, they’re going to bring guys in from overseas. “They had a bit of a clean-out of players and brought in some new guys, but there’s no split camp between South Africans and everyone else. We’re not just a South African side playing over here.”

MAKING THE MOVE Of the South Africans to have moved north, Joubert has been among the most successful and was last season shortlisted for the competition’s player of the year award. It has been a remarkable turnaround for a player who, by his own admission, had hit the wall in South Africa and had given up on his chances of playing for the Boks. “That book was closed a while ago. I was 28 and hadn’t been picked so I knew

GHOSTS OF SEASONS PAST It wasn’t all smooth sailing for Saracens last season – a loss of form mid-season threatened to scuttle the rugby revolution under way at Vicarage Road. “The rule changes hurt us,” Joubert says, referring to the tension between kicking and running rugby evident wherever the game is played. “We started off using our kicking game but it became a game where it was safer to keep the ball in hand – we had to change our approach and it didn’t really work out.” After a season rich in accomplishment came the disappointment of losing 3327 to Leicester in the final. While Leicester celebrated their third title in four years, Saracens were left with the sense that glory had slipped through their fingers. “With the final, you can sit back and watch it over and over and analyse it,” Joubert says, “but it’s just going to haunt you for the rest of your life, so you just move on and focus on the next season.”

ON THE BOKS Like any loyal Saffa, Joubert has a view on the recent struggles of the Springboks and how they’re shaping up for next year’s World Cup. “They’ve not had the best Tri-Nations, but it’s a year before the World Cup and that’s when teams are sorting things out,” he says. “The law changes have affected their kicking game and they’re having to adapt. They’ve had progress just in this Tri-Nations but New Zealand are probably a little way ahead. “I think there’s time for South Africa to catch up, though, and I’m sure that by the World Cup they’ll be a force to reckon with.”

Leading by example: Joubert on the charge

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tntjobs.co.uk BEST OF THE WEB ROKIT www.rokit.co.uk

JOB OF THE WEEK: Full Time Salesperson Location: Covent Garden Salary: TBA

Rokit, the leading vintage clothing company is seeking a full-time salesperson for its flagship store in Covent Garden.

You will have a minimum of 2 year’s retail sales experience, possess strong customer service and sales skills and work well in a team. Merchandising, administrative skills and knowledge of vintage fashion are advantageous. Email CV with cover letter to: rokitcoventgarden@yahoo.com with ‘TNT’ in the subject line.

BEATTHATQUOTE.COM www.beatthatquote.com

JOB OF THE WEEK: Administrator (technical) Location: Kentish Town Salary: Up to £18K

BeatThatQuote.com is a marketing company that connects buyers with product providers and specialises in the financial services industry.

We are looking for a competent, diligent person for an administrative role to help us manage our email campaigns. Reporting to the Business Facilities Manager, this job is primarily a support and operational role, and would suit someone who has good attention to detail, is IT-literate and familiar with using computers. Good written and spoken English are also important. Silvia | silvia@beatthatquote.com

A CENA RESTAURANT T: 0208 2880108 www.acena.co.uk

JOB OF THE WEEK: Commis Chef Location: Richmond / St. Margarets Salary: £19,000

A Cena is a well established, family run, local Italian restaurant that has a strong loyal base of regular customers.

We require a commis chef who is eager and willing to learn everything about Italian cooking. Ability to work in a team essential. Everything is cooked on site. Tim Healey | 0208 2880108

AT YOUR SERVICE - EVENT STAFFING T: 020 7610 8610 www.ays.co.uk The UK’s leading supplier of the highest quality temporary staff, to the country’s most exclusive event organisers and caterers.

TRUST EDUCATION T: 020 7328 0000 www.trusteducation.co.uk Well respected education recruitment business specialising in providing excellent teachers to quality schools throughout London.

JOB OF THE WEEK: Temporary Events Staff Location: London and Nationwide Salary: Competitive We are looking for highly presentable, confident and approachable individuals with a can-do attitude to join our team. We work at London’s prominent landmark venues and society’s most prestigious events & glamorous parties. We offer flexible hours and excellent rates of remuneration. Sam Flintham-Ward | recruitment@ays.co.uk

JOB OF THE WEEK: Trainee Recruitment Consultant Location: Queen’s Park, NW6 Salary: On application Energetic and enthusiastic graduate required to start their career in recruitment. Ideally with a passion for education, great attention to detail and a relationship builder - we will teach you all there is to know! Sally Ancketill | 020 7328 0000 | sally@trusteducation.co.uk

BAPTIE & CO LTD T: 020 7150 0100 www.baptie.com We specialise in building online and offline business to business communities, delivering best practice and how to information.

JOB OF THE WEEK: Telesales Executive Location: London N1 Salary: £18,500 PA We urgently require experienced Telesales professionals to speak to senior marketing executives in Europe’s leading IT & Telecoms Companies. You will be making delegate sales on one of our long established conferences. £18,500 PA + Bonus + Commission OTE £25,000. Harry Dugdale | 020 7250 0100 | hdugdale@baptie.com

LOOKING FOR YOUR NEXT JOB? NEW JOBS ONLINE EVERY DAY To advertise your job of the week contact the TNT sales team| 020 7341 6767 | sales@tntmagazine.com

CAREERS CAREERS & MONEY

expanded and opportunities presented themselves, I took advantage of them. I never thought I’d be selling IT security. What do you do day-to-day?

ON THE JOB BRIDGETTE SINCLAIR Career UK/Ireland SMB Partner Account Manager for Symantec Hosted Services Age 38 Lives Pimlico From Auckland, New Zealand How did you get into your line of work?

Purely by accident. I started at MessageLabs (the global market leader in managed IT security) as PA to the VP of Sales EMEA. As the company

The role is a joint marketing and sales role and is extremely varied. I work with our marketing team, co-ordinating communications, promotions, incentives and events for our partners. I also work with the SMB (small and medium size business) sales team to help them with selling through the channel and recruiting new partners. I am responsible for managing two of our channel programmes including recruitment, enablement, training and selling. What’s the best thing about your job?

The variety, travel opportunities, autonomy and money – earning commission rocks! What’s the most challenging thing about your job?

Having to hit a monthly sales target and relying on a team to do this for me.

OFFICE GURU Samantha Baden

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TACKLES YOUR CAREER DRAMAS

I am currently a partqualified accountant – how can contracting benefit my career? Hays’ Catherine Goosem says that contracting can help your career as you’ll complete different projects and move on to new challenges more frequently, gaining a broader range of

skills and experiences in different organisations. Also, working as a temp can mean flexible hours and locations, which can allow individuals to have greater control of their work-life balance. The exposure can also help you understand where your strengths lie and help form your career path.

Tourism jobs boom N

ew jobs on offer in leisure and tourism reached a record high last month, ensuring that the UK job market remained steady in a traditionally soft period. “While the seasonal tourist boom and an unexpected rise in consumer confidence may have helped fuel record demand for new staff in leisure, tourism and retail, demand has also risen across broader commercial and

financial sectors,” Martin Warnes, managing director of reed.co.uk, told UKPA. “Traditionally, the UK job market is quiet in August … even though public sector jobs continue to decline, this is quietly encouraging news for the economy as a whole.”

PUBLIC SECTOR CRISIS

IT SALARIES STALL

British public sector workers are so concerned about redundancy most would take a pay cut of up to 10 per cent to keep their jobs, according to Totaljobs.com. Nearly a third of public sector workers have already taken a cut this year.

Demand for IT skills remains on the rise in Australia, but salaries have become stagnant and are likely to remain so until mid-2011, according to a salary survey released by recruitment company Peoplebank Australia.

tntjobs.co.uk Sign up for job alerts and get more career advice at tntjobs.co.uk

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CAREERS & MONEY

MONEY

WHERE DOES YOUR DOSH GO?

Jim Freeman

Energy price hike looms DF energy customers will be dismayed to learn that the price of electricity is set to rise next month. About 1.2 million customers will be affected by the 2.6 per cent rise, which will apply to customers on a standard tariff in 11 regions and Economy 7 tariffs in three areas.

EASY MONEY Laura Adcock MAKES YOUR CASH GO FURTHER

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website uSwitch.com, told the Mail Online: “No matter how this is dressed, this is a price rise and will be worrying news to consumers.” An EDF spokesman said: “We have been absorbing these costs for many months, but we now have to pass on some of the resulting rise.”

METRO BANK IN DEMAND

BAND FAIR FOR ALL

The first start-up bank in the UK for more than 100 years is considering accelerating its branch opening programme after receiving a better than expected response to its Holborn and Earl’s Court outlets. A further 11 branches are due to be opened over the next two years.

Newly re-formed band Libertines have devised a new ballot method for selling their tickets to help ensure all fans get a fair price. Carl Barat spoke out against ticket reselling in a personal email to fans saying: “We put the system in place to try to rule out secondary ticketing.”

How do you budget?

I tend to leave £100-£150 in my spending account for the week depending on what I have planned. Any money tips for when you fi rst arrive?

The quicker you get out of converting back to your native currency, the better. Last big blowout?

A laptop at the start of the year, and more recently flights to Spain. What non-essential do you regularly spend money on?

M&S ready-made mashed potato – I love the stuff. Apart from that, it would be partying, although I see that as an essential – you’re in London, enjoy yourself! What is the first thing to go when money runs low?

Cab rides after a night out.

THE COST OF A GOOD STORY There’s big money in writing a best-seller, as the top earning authors from the last 12 months know all too well. It takes one good idea … » Computer-phobe James in $40m last year without even Patterson writes all his work by hand but has made a US$70m fortune from his stories about American forensic psychologist supersleuth Alex Cross. » Stephenie Meyer, the mastermind behind the Twilight phenomenon raked

writing a book. Before this, Meyer had never even written so much as a short story. » Stephen King, the godfather of contemporary horror, took home $34m last year. He began his career selling his stories to classmates.

Kimberley French, TNT Images

This year’s festival season may only just be drawing to a close, but now’s the perfect time to start thinking about next year. Plan which festivals you are really keen on and find out when the earlybird tickets go on sale. Many events, and particularly London festivals such as SW4 and Field Day, offer cheaper tickets if you commit to buying a ticket in advance. For larger events such as Glastonbury and Bestival you won’t get the tickets cheaper, but you will get the option to spread the cost across the year. If you don’t have to pay the ticket price in one lump sum, it is more manageable.

The higher charges are likely to anger many, as it comes despite the relatively low wholesale cost of electricity and gas. The French-owned supplier made a profit of £2.5bn in the first six months of 2010. Thomas Lyon, an energy expert at price comparison

Job US Tax Consultant From Brisbane, Australia Lives Willesden Green Age 31

Targeting the Best in Edinburgh, Scotland

Demand continues to be high for qualified finance professionals in Scotland’s Capital. Quality opportunities exist in temporary, contract and permanent markets and include challenging roles within international organisations and high-profile positions in smaller, expanding companies. Roles are broad-ranging but include financial and management reporting accountants, financial and business analysts, decision support and risk professionals. If you are a qualified finance professional and interested in a move to Edinburgh please contact us for more information. For those new to the area we will endeavour to assist you with any relocation queries.

T: +44(0)131 225 8030 - E: tnt@wilkinsonandassociates.co.uk - W: www.wilkinsonandassociates.co.uk 46 Melville Street, Edinburgh, EH3 7HF, UK

tntjobs.co.uk BEST OF THE WEB RENARD RESOURCES T: 020 7287 2299 www.renardresources.co.uk Est. in 1996. A boutique hospitality recruitment agency supplying to 5 star hotels, restaurants, contract and event caterers.

JOB OF THE WEEK: Plate & Silver Service staff wanted Location: London Salary: £6 - £7.50 + Holiday We require experienced, energetic individuals for the upcoming busy period to join our team of waiting staff on a flexible basis. Hospitality experience preferred. Please forward your C.V or pop into the office. Nelson Pereira | Nelson@renardresources.co.uk

GINA CONWAY AVEDA SALONS & SPAS T: 020 8090 5818 www.ginaconway.co.uk

JOB OF THE WEEK: Stylists and Beauty Therapists Location: Notting Hill, Fulham,Wimbledon & Chelsea Salary: Competitive with benefits

Gina Conway Aveda Salons and Spas are a global award winning brand in London. Offering bespoke guest experiences, we are a committed team of professionals.

Experienced stylists and Beauty Therapists wanted - The ideal candidate will need to be motivated, enthusiastic, reliable and have outstanding customer care skills. Applicants from overseas with a current work visa welcomed. Laura Dando | 020 8090 5818 | hr@ginaconway.co.uk

REBEL SPORTS

JOB OF THE WEEK: Sales Location: SW London Salary: £500.00 + Per Week

An exciting and growing business run by young friendly foreigners, responsible for marketing one of the UKs largest outdoor sports companies!

You will join a fun sales team selling a competitive sports package direct to the public. Flexi hours and excellent commission rate makes this the number job for young travellers or those seeking a different path! Jay | rebelsports@live.co.uk

LOOKING FOR YOUR NEXT JOB? NEW JOBS ONLINE EVERY DAY tntmagazine.com

CAREERS & MONEY

COMING & GOING

ASK THE EXPERTS Marissa Murdock EXPERT, VISABUREAU.COM

I was recently at the pub with a few friends of mine who are on working holiday (Tier 5) visas. Talk turned to another friend of ours who has been living in the UK for quite a while. I had no idea, but apparently this person has been on a working holiday visa for the best part of three years. Now, never in a million years would I do this, but some of my friends have started thinking about it. What exactly happens to overstayers if the Home Office find out?

Working holidaymaker visas and Tier 5 (Youth Mobility Scheme) visas are issued for two years, after which remaining in the

MOVING ON CHECKLIST Resign from work How

UK without obtaining another visa constitutes illegal overstaying. All travellers to the UK will either be visa checked on arrival, or if visiting may receive a visitor’s visa on arrival (if non-visa national). It is at the discretion of the Home Office as to the degree of action they will take; however, overstayers can be deported and in some instances be given a ban from the UK. Working in the UK without a valid visa is also illegal and can result in large fines for employers.

» For more, see visabureau.com. To ask a question about getting started or moving on email realitycheck@tntmagazine.com.

JUST ARRIVED

much notice you need to give your employer will depend on your contract (usually two weeks to three months). You must give at least one week’s notice if you’ve been in your job for a month or more. Give notice on your flat

Check the conditions of your Tenancy Agreement. If you want to leave before your lease is up you may be liable to pay until new tenants are found. If you’re living in a sharehouse and haven’t signed a contract, you can move out whenever you want, though it’s usual to give a month’s notice and help find someone to move in.

ACCOMMODATION

Pay and cancel your bills

There are Antipodeans and South Africans calling all parts of London home, but generally they tend to head west (Acton, Shepherd’s Bush, Fulham, Hammersmith), north (Dollis Hill, Kilburn, Willesden Green) or south (Clapham, Southfields, Tooting). For listings see tntmagazine. com/accommodation. Dossing Offer to chip in £5 a night minimum. Hostels Expect to pay at least £10-£25 a night. Sharing You can share a room for about £50 a week, while a room to yourself will start at about £80 a week. Going it alone A bedsit or studio is at least £150 a week. Bills Bills can include phone, gas, electricity, water, council tax and a TV licence. Bond This is usually a month’s rent. You may also have to pay one month’s rent in advance. Leases You may need to sign a lease, which will typically run for six or 12 months.

Namely council tax, internet, phone, gas, electricity, TV, gym membership, insurance.

EMPLOYMENT

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on bank payments will be filed with a credit reference agency (making it difficult for you to set up an account or rent a flat if you return), or you could receive a County Court Judgement.

TAX

banking, finance, secretarial, legal, medical and teaching are the broad categories. Go to see a consultant, and take your passport, CV and references. Some agencies will help you open a bank account.

NATIONAL INSURANCE You need a National Insurance (NI) number to work in the UK. Call 0845 600 0643 to make an appointment to apply for one. Some NI contributions go into a State Second Pension (S2P). You can contract out of this and direct the money into a private pension fund instead. You’ll need to do this before the end of the tax year or your contributions will be lost.

TNT’S TOP TIP

Your Oyster Card can get you discounts on things like theatre tickets. Log on to tfl.gov.uk for more info.

» Email your tips to reality check@tntmagazine.com

TNT online Check out tntmagazine.com/ movingtolondon if you’re on your way, tntmagazine.com/ leavingtheuk if you’re going.

The UK tax year begins on April 6, and if you work only part of the tax year you should get some tax back. The tax threshold is £6475 per year – so if you earn less than this, you won’t pay any tax. You’ll need a P45 (when you leave a job) and a P60 (at the end of the tax year). If you’re leaving the UK and won’t work again before the end of the tax year, you can claim a rebate by filling in a P85.

SHIPPING Get plenty of quotes, checking sizes and whether customs and tax charges are covered. For sea freight (which should take no longer than 12 weeks to arrive) you’ll pay about £80£150 for your first box – less for suitcases – and £30-£90 for additional boxes.

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Getting a job doesn’t have to be an impossible task. Register with a couple of agencies, the cream of which advertise in TNT and at tntjobs.co.uk. Most recruitment agencies handle specific sectors: IT,

Settle overdrafts and credit cards Any defaults

TRAVEL GLOBAL VISION The Catholic community in Hyderabad, India celebrates the annual Feast of the Birth of Mother

TRAVEL

Mary at various places of worship. An illuminated cross is reflected in the glass casing of this particular statue of Mary.

Photo by Noah Seelam/ AFP/Getty Images

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L A V I SURV OF THE

FITTEST Discover your inner Ray Mears while on a survival weekend in rural Wales WORDS STEVE STILL

Gower WALES

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My ‘intrepid’ companion Russ and I are rapidly discovering that surviving is a full-time job, although not quite the endurance test feared by horrified friends who thought we were heading for a Heart of Darkness-style nightmare.

FIRESTARTERS An introduction to knives has given us some rudimentary skills for peg making but Ray Mears we are not. We try our

hands at the infamous bow drill – a makeshift firelighter with a handmade bow, which, if used in a sawing motion correctly, creates friction, charcoal and fire. Simple enough. Or so I think after our guide Scott’s demonstration. But I am hopeless at it, while Russ casually lights a spark like a man born in a cave, albeit one who refuses to leave home without a blowup bed and PJs.

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idway through a survival skills weekend and my 53rd firelighting attempt, I wonder what kind of people my ancestors were. Thieves or pillagers perhaps? Maybe they were related to one of the great Zippo dynasties, but I doubt they were survivalists. We are deep(ish) in the leafy surrounds of Gower on the Welsh coast near Swansea and hunkering down for a warts-and-all weekend learning primitive skills.

SHORT BREAK GOWER HIGHLIGHTS GOWER’S TOP ATTRACTIONS

Ray Mears: cult hero

ITV / Rex Features

WRIGGLY TREATS After gathering firewood, a job seemingly occupying most of primitive man’s TV-free life, we are ready for lunch. To our dismay, the appetiser is mealworm surprise. Having failed with fire and feeling my manly veneer slipping, I chuck one in the pan. It tastes a little like chicken flavour crisps, and is packed with protein. One is enough. Then, wood spits are contructed. As mackerel cooks, tea boils and hobnobs are eaten, Scott explains bushcraft. We learn the medicinal and nutritional qualities of the plants around us, make our own string from nettles and set traps for wildlife. THAT’LL LEARN YOU Survival breaks are growing in popularity, especially for stag weekends. Mears and Bear Grylls occupy God-like status in some circles and one obsessive even mortgaged his home for a skills weekend with Mears. Some courses are a pure test of endurance, according to Scott, where the thrill is from surviving at the hands of a chickenheadchomping former drill sergeant. He’s not into that: “No one learns when they’re tired

TRAVEL

Famed for its glorious scenery, unspoilt beaches and cute villages, the Gower Peninsula is an area of outstanding natural beauty. Gower has a surfeit of pristine beaches, with Three Cliffs Bay often being hailed the area’s most beautiful, but it never gets too busy as it’s not that accessible. The beach is only reachable by walking a few miles from the village of Parkmill. During the hike, you will pass a golf course, the ruins of Pennard Castle and fields inhabited by wild ponies. Meanwhile, Rhossili Bay offers the best surfing opportunities, with plenty of places in which to rent surfboards and take surf lessons.

Glorious : Gower Peninsula

and uncomfortable. Any fool can suffer.” With this in mind, we set about building a rickety shelter from wood and leaves but we simply look at it and opt to sleep in hammocks. The next day, after several hours of cursing, and with a little help, I finally create fire, feeling not unlike the first man might have done. So, more like Gloria Gaynor than Bush Tucker Man, we survive – with some new skills which may come in handy if the lights finally do go out in Britain soon.

» Steve Still was hosted by Shaggy Sheep Wales (07919 244549; shaggysheepwales.co.uk), which offers bushcraft, shooting, rafting, climbing and canoeing year-round, from £120, including all food, activities and camping.

NEED TO KNOW

WHEN TO GO The bushcraft courses run all year round. GETTING THERE Take a National Express coach from London to Swansea, then take a taxi (10 minute ride). GETTING AROUND On foot for the course. Explore Gower by car. Hire a car at easycar.com/tntmagazine for a 5 per cent discount. GOING OUT A pint of beer is about £2. ACCOMMODATION Camping is included in the bushcraft WALES ENGLAND package. SEE Swansea shaggysheepwales. Cardiff Gower co.uk.

You don’t have to be a B-list celeb to eat mealworm

LATE DEALS

TRAVEL

UNDER £250

Three nights in Dublin with Flight Centre (0844 800 8628; flightcentre.co.uk) is £185, including flights and B&B accommodation. Quote: DUBLONPAC2. Valid for travel between September 20 and December 20. Offer ends September 30. Explore the Isle of Wight for £99 with Anderson Tours (0207 436 9304; andersontours.co.uk), including coach, ferry crossings and one night’s B&B accommodation. Departs September 25. A nine-day Turkey Christmas tour is £215 (reduced by £215) with Travel Talk (020 8099 8852; traveltalktours.com), including B&B accommodation and five dinners. Departs December 18. Excludes flights. Spend a weekend horse riding in the Brecon Beacons, Wales for £210 with Bush Wakkers (01874 636552; bushwakkers.co.uk), including transport, two nights’ accommodation, all food and horse riding. Departs every Friday from west London. Hire a two-seater campervan for three days with Wicked Campers (0808 234 8461; wickedcampers.co.uk), for £157, including insurance for one driver aged 25 and over, unlimited mileage and 24-hour roadside assistance. Available for pick-up in London.

An eight-day tour of India is £399 with On the Go Tours (020 7371 1113; onthegotours.com). Excludes flights. Departs September 25.

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DAILY TRAVEL DEALS GO TO tntmagazine.com/travel/latedeals where new travel deals are updated daily. There are more than 30 deals live at any time. Also sign up for TNT’s weekly travel newsletter, which will be emailed to you every Wednesday with the most up-to-date deals and guides to over 170 destinations. Sign up at tntmagazine.com/travelemail.

£250 - £500

OVER £500

An eight-day Morocco tour is £279 (saving £80) with Travel Talk (020 8099 8852; traveltalktours.com). Visit Casablanca, Marrakesh and more. Departs September 25. Excludes flights. Discover Lombok and Gili Islands on a six-day tour for £270 (reduced from £359) with STA Travel (0871 230 8512; statravel.co.uk). Departs October 9. Excludes flights. Soak up the sun and surf in Fuerteventura for £308 with Lowcostholidays.com (0800 1116271), including flights and all-inclusive accommodation. Departs September 29. Tour Jordan for seven days for £357 with Topdeck Travel (020 8987 3300; topdeck.travel), including B&B, a 4x4 jeep excursion of Wadi Rum and horse riding in Petra. Departs October 2.

An eight-day tour of Italy is £736 with Topdeck Travel (020 8987 3300; topdeck.travel), including B&B, three dinners, and a day trip to Cinque Terre. Departs September 17. Spend nine days in the Galapagos Islands for £847 with STA Travel (0871 230 0040; statravel.co.uk), including transport and accommodation. Excludes international flights and meals. Departs October 8 from Quito. A 15-day Cuba tour is £1027.80 with Tucan Travel (020 8896 1600; tucantravel.com). Excludes flights. Departs October 29. Book before September 30. Camp your way around 10 countries in Europe for 21 days with Contiki (0845 075 0990; contiki.co.uk) for £981, including Oktoberfest. Departs September 17.

*All fares are ex-London, unless otherwise stated.

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DEAL OF THE WEEK

Galapagos Islands, Ecuador

TRAVEL 61

TNT Weekender Sarajevo BOSNIA AND HERZEGOVINA

In Sarajevo’s city centre, holes in the road filled with red cement mark sites where civiliansdied in mortar attacks. These ‘Sarajevo Roses’ are among the few reminders of the war that raged here from 1992-95. Today, Sarajevo is a bustling, glittering city, full of “coffee freaks and party animals”, according to a local.

HEADLINE ATTRACTION During the 1992-95 siege of Sarajevo, a 700m tunnel was dug to transport food, ammunition and manpower from the outskirts to the city centre. The Kolar family home by the city airport disguised one end of the tunnel, and a museum has been set up here. Besides two rooms filled with war memorabilia, you can walk the first 20m of the tunnel.

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BEST OF THE REST Explore Turkish Sarajevo’s warren of narrow streets leading off Bascarsija (dubbed Pigeon Square), which are filled with coffee shops, restaurants, and a bazaar.

Mosques and minarets spike the sky and coffee is served in a copper pot, with a Turkish delight and a hefty caffeine kick.

CHOW DOWN Carnivores don’t have to look far for a feed in Sarajevo, where the smell of grilled meat wafts through the streets of the Turkish Quarter. Sample traditional food such as cevapcici (minced lamb or beef) and burek (pastry stuffed with meat or cheese). Veal crops up on a lot of menus, and if you don’t want to go hungry try

For dancing, try ‘90s throwback club Sloga. Beware slivovica, a local, 45 per cent proof spirit.

OUT OF TOWN Explore the hills that ring the city and visit Jajce Castle and the ruins of a medieval village, before getting the best view in town at the Park Princeva restaurant. Stick to the roads unless with a guide as there are unexploded mines, but just 20 minutes from the town centre, the slopes used for the 1984 Winter Olympics are safe to ski.

A BIT OF HISTORY The most famous of the Ottoman bridges crossing the Miljacka river is Latinska cuprija. Here, on June 28, 1915 Archduke Franz Ferdinand (the Austro-Hungarian heir) and his wife, Sophie, were gunned down by Serbian nationalist Gavrilo Princip, an assassination that sparked World War I.

bosanski lonac – a hearty meat stew cooked over an open fire.

TRY THE LOCAL TIPPLE Try a Sarajevsko beer at the Sarajevo Brewery or City Pub, a boisterous bar with live music.

NEED TO KNOW WHEN TO GO Avoid the chill from December to February, unless you want to ski. GETTING THERE Fly direct to Sarajevo. If you’re coming from a neighbouring country, buses or trains are a good option. VISAS South Africans need a visa. Australians and New Zealanders don’t. CURRENCY Convertible Marka. 1 GBP = 2.39 BAM. LANGUAGE Bosnian, Croatian and Serbian. GETTING AROUND The city centre is easily explored on foot but taxis are reasonable if you want to go further out. GOING OUT A beer is about 4 BAM a bottle. ACCOMMODATION Dorm rooms from 25 BAM and double rooms from 30 BAM. SEE sarajevo.ba/en.

NEXT WEEK NUREMBURG

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BOSNIA SARAJEVO

For a full travel guide on Bosnia and Herzegovina go to tntmagazine.com/travel

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PEAK SEASON Explore Switzerland’s rugged Flims region on mountain bikes WORDS ALISON GRINTER

Flims SWITZERLAND

ain. Damn. A less intrepid group of would-be mountain bikers might be put off by the wet conditions but we simply don our wet weather gear and gather at the suggestively named bike rental shop F***. We’re told it stands for “free” – who knew that was considered such a dirty word in Switzerland?!

ROCK ’N’ ROLL Our no-nonsense guide Curdin Bundi matches us each with a bike and we’re off to explore this little corner of Switzerland’s most easternmost canton, Graubunden. The rain is really hammering down as we cycle out from our base, the ultramodern Rocks Resort. Situated in the town of Laax, in the region of Flims it styles itself as a “cutting edge” mountain resort. The night before its unfortunately named “Crap Bar” gave us the giggles but the staff assured us that crap is the native Romansch word for rock, which seems to be a theme around here (rocks that is, not crap). And not surprising, really. As long as 10,000 years ago, the mighty Flims

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NEED TO KNOW

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rockslide gouged out the amazing, rugged landscape we are hurtling through now. Most of our group are experienced road cyclists but have little experience mountain biking so the bikes we are riding, with their bouncy suspension, are something of a novelty. Two lessexperienced cyclists in our party have been given Flyer Electro Bikes – cycles with little motors that kick in when the rider needs extra juice to get up the hills. And there are surplus of those. There’s a lot of gear crunching before some of us (ok, me) get the knack of climbing and descending hills. It can be quite hard on the old legs but is fantastic exercise. Who needs a wussy electro flyer anyway?

SWIMMING IN THE RAIN With more than 330kms of marked biking trails in the area there’s a huge choice of routes including the advanced Vorab route which climbs 2600m into the mountains and is Curdin’s favourite. “You have to be in good condition, but you get wonderful views,” he tells us.

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ZURICH WHEN TO GO For Flims Chur Laax activities such as mountain biking, hiking SWITZERLAND and whitewater rafting summer is the optimum time. During winter Flims is a ski resort. GETTING THERE Swissair (swiss.com) flies direct to Zurich from London City Airport with return tickets starting at £113. Trains from Zurich HB to Chur take approximately one hour and 15 mins. Buses from Chur HB to Laax Murschteg take 30 mins. GETTING AROUND The Swiss public transport network is as extensive as it is efficient. VISAS Australians and Kiwis don’t need a holiday visa but South Africans require a Schengan visa. CURRENCY 1 GBP = 1.654 CHF LANGUAGE Swiss German, Romansh and Italian are the official languages here but English is also widely spoken. GOING OUT A beer costs about 9 CHF. ACCOMMODATION rocksresort.com has a selection of apartments for rent. SEE Flims.com.

MOUNTAIN MUNCHIES

It means ‘rock’, honest

Happily, our route is a little more sedate and leads us to the beautiful azure Lake Cuama. “We have three lakes, all of which have mineral water so you can drink while you swim,” one of the F*** staffers tells us. Despite the rain and the near-rumble of thunder some loons feel the need to test this out. “It’s warmer in the water than it is outside!” they report post-dip. After all that, none of them even bothered to taste the water, but one “drank some through my nose I think”. Lovely. Back in the saddle and some of us are feeling a little cold and damp. But it won’t be long before those hills warm us up again.

» Alison Grinter travelled with Swiss Air (swissair.com) and Rocksresort (41 081 927 7777; rocksresort.com). Summer rates for a two bedroom apartment from CHF 148/night; from CHF 1036/week.

After a solid afternoon of peddling, we are in desperate need of some fuel so our guide leads us to Restaurant Conn to sample some alpine cuisine. We’re expecting a rustic little cafe but this is a classy establishment, serving the kind of gourmet fare you’d find in a Michelin-starred restaurant. We try a melon salad with sheep’s cheese followed by local specialty Trinser Birnenravioli, a pasta filled with pear and cinnamon. The Ibex and stag on the walls are not just for show – the owner hunts them and serves them in the restaurant. You can wash it all down with a nice shot of schnapps – the Swiss farmers apparently used to have a shot to warm themselves up before heading out to work in the fields.

Clean air = big appetite

TNT online For a full travel guide on Switzerland go to tntmagazine.com

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HOTSHOTS Hayley Madden TALKS TRAVEL PHOTOGRAPHY

WINNER PYRAMIDS, EGYPT Chris Flack, Christchurch, New Zealand

This is a great shot of the pyramids being dwarfed by the man towering over the horse and desert, and the contrasting expressions of the man and horse are priceless. The crisp side light gives great form to the scene, and the strong pinky-colour cast and the distinct vignette at

the edges gives the whole image the look and feel of an old Western, which is very appropriate for the subject. HOT TIP: How you process and print the final image can make a world of difference to the look and feel of a photo. Get to know your films and labs or your computer processing software, as this

RUNNER-UP BEE OUT FOR LUNCH Edward Berry, Brisbane, Australia Catching a bee on a flower is a feat in itself. Capturing it in motion is a totally different business altogether, and Edward has also managed to balance it with the flower. Using a flash has helped to freeze the movement, and has also brightened the colours and given a shine to the bees head so we can see

knowledge can provide you with enormous creative range. » Chris wins a three-day tour of Scotland for two valued at £198 from Haggis Adventures (0131 557 9393; haggisadventures.com)

its features right down to the pollen on its face. Depth of field is shallow at this close range so the background has been reduced to lovely tones of green to offset the yellow. HOT TIP: It’s easier to freeze movement if the subject is moving towards the lens. » Edward wins a photography course from Nigel Wilson Photography (020 7793 8664; photographycourses.org.uk) valued at £60

HOTSHOTS

HOLIDAY SNAPS

HOW TO MAKE YOUR PHOTOS STAND OUT

THEME: SETTING THE SCENE Santorini, Greece by Chris Fitzpatrick, Beechworth, Victoria Showing scenes in different ways is part of a photographer’s job, but sometimes pictures just present themselves, but it is only the truly dedicated among us that will have a camera ready to snap that perfect image.

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WHY THIS WORKS: 1 Bizarre juxtaposition of foreground and background. 2 The positioning of the boats leads the eye up the frame. 3 Interesting background shape – the island looks like a UFO hovering in the sky. 4 Flat, shadowless lighting and muted colours give a surreal feel to the whole scene. 5 The image raises questions about the scene and why the mannequins are there.

MONEY SAVING TIPS: 1 Buy second-hand. Search the internet and scour the shops for barely-used kit. 2 Bulk buy your prints. Most labs offer deals on 100 prints or more and many have offers. 3 Make use of free software.

You don’t need Photoshop or Aperture to get creative. Freeware such as Gimp and Photoplus are great for getting experimental and for non-commercial

projects, try Renderosity. 4 Volunteer. Smaller charities will be appreciative and you’ll get invaluable on-the-job experience that no amount of paid training could provide.

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PROTECT YOUR

HOLIDAY

Avoid getting stranded abroad when your holiday company goes bust by reading our essential guide to travel protection WORDS MARIE TEATHER

hirteen travel firms have gone into administration in the UK this year as a result of the recession, belt-tightening by travellers and the Icelandic volcanic ash cloud that threw European travel into turmoil. As a result, the industry has reported a surge in customers seeking advice after the failures of holiday companies such as Kiss Flights, Goldtrail Holidays and Sun4U. For thousands their dream holiday had

become a nightmare – they faced the prospect of being stranded abroad, thrown out of the hotels they had paid for or losing their holiday all together. Kathryn Ward, retail director of Thomson and First Direct said: “Customers are naturally concerned about their holidays in the current climate. They want to be confident that they will not be left with the stress of having to rearrange their holiday plans should the worst happen.”

BEHIND THE JARGON So how do you know if your holiday operator is offering you the right kind of protection? There are two regulatory bodies to check your operator is a member of: ATOL (Air Travel Organiser’s Licence) and ABTA (Association of British Travel Agents). ATOL is a financial protection scheme managed by the Civil Aviation Authority (CAA). It protects you from losing your

SHORT BREAK

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Travel hell: avoid this situa tion like the plague

TNT Images, Getty Images

money or being stranded abroad by carrying out checks on the holiday operators it licenses and requiring them to take part in a financial guarantee scheme. This provides the funds to protect customers should a firm fail. On its website, the CAA states: “If an ATOL tour operator goes out of business, the CAA will ensure you do not lose the money you paid over, or if you’re abroad, we’ll arrange for you to finish your holiday and fly home.” But it does get a little more complicated. Although all holiday companies selling air holiday packages and flights in the UK are required by law to hold the ATOL licence, protection is not offered if you create a so-called “DIY holiday” – booking flights and accommodation from different suppliers, such as airlines, hotels or via internet booking sites.

NICE PACKAGE Booking online with separate suppliers may seem like a cheap option, but if an airline were to stop flying, you might pay considerably more to get another flight home or you may not get to your accommodation that you have paid for and lose your money. Instead, booking a complete package from a single holiday company will ensure your holiday is protected under ATOL.

Maya Bay, Thailand: You wouldn’t want to leave unexpectedly

Pru Goudie, Head of Marketing for On the Go tours, says: “The cost for a travel company, such as ourselves, is not passed onto the customer. But for us to be ATOL – bonded and a member of ABTA we have to meet certain regulations. Customers are assured of exemplary service standards, high customer service levels and that their money is 100 per cent safe.”

CHECK POINT Over at ABTA, which represents almost 6000 holiday operators, their aim is to maintain high standards of trading practice for the travel industry and customers. As they state on their website: “ABTA is essentially a guide to good practice, although some of what it contains is also required under UK and European law.” Essentially, if you go on holiday and are dissatisfied with the services, conditions, changes to your booking, or you have problems understanding the small print of your booking, it’s ABTA that you need to contact. The advice from experts at the moment?

Ask your holiday operator when you book if they are ATOL and ABTA members and how exactly they will help you should the unforeseen happen.

Protect yourself: complete packages are a safer bet

THE IMPORTANCE OF INSURANCE

An ‘act of God’: the Eyjafjallajökull eruption

In times when many of us are trying to save money, it’s understandable that some people start to question the importance of travel insurance. Take the recent case of newly-wed Carrie-Anne Freeland who broke her spine after falling from her balcony. then was stranded in Corfu until she was able to raise the £16,000 air ambulance fee. She and her husband wrongly believed that the European Health Insurance Card (EHIC) would cover their medical costs in the event of an emergency.

It’s not just health issues that you should check your policies for. During the volcanic ash crisis many travellers found that their insurance didn’t cover what some insurers term an “act of God.” Frances Tuke, spokesperson for ABTA, said: “Whether you’re covered by your insurance depends on each individual policy. If people have booked parts of their holiday separately and not as part of a package, then this is where insurance should kick in and they need to check the terms of their policy.”

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TIPS Cappadocia, Turkey

READERS’ TIPS MEET AND GREET

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Off to New York? TIP OF Then be sure to THE WEEK make use of a Big Apple Greeter. You’ll be met by a volunteer who will spend a few hours showing you any part of the city you would like to see. The service is totally free with no strings attached. See bigapplegreeter.org.

Joanna, via email

BAG IT UP

YOU ASKED FOR IT Tom Hall FROM LONELY PLANET

While travelling, protect your valuables, such as your passport and camera, by keeping them in plastic sandwich bags. The bags will prevent the items from getting dusty or wet. The bags are also good for taking advantage of breakfast buffets. Make up an extra sandwich and put it in a bag for lunch. Rachel, via email

I have two months off at the beginning of next year and I’m looking for somewhere warm and cheap where I can relax. I don’t want to do too much except maybe swim, hike, cycle or snorkel. Are there some chilled out backpacker hangouts in India, Asia or Central America that I should check out? Mark, via email

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At least it’s obvious as to where to begin. Istanbul, once Constantinople, once Turkey’s capital, is forever one of the world’s great cities. You could do with a week here: longer if you like old churches, fresh fish and lively nights out. From here most people head down to the coast to Ephesus, sometimes via Troy and Gallipoli, until reaching seaside Antalya. The inland route is just as thrilling: the modern capital of Ankara and the astonishing landscapes of Cappadocia. Should you wish, you can keep going east via the amazing collection of ancient heads of Mount Nemrut and Lake Van, from where Syria and Iran are in easy reach. Bus and train are both popular but you shouldn’t have to book more than a day or two in advance. Turkish food is superb, and you should stop by a mehayne (meze restaurant) or two as well as sampling pide, which is the Turkish take on pizza. Turkish coffee is short, thick and strong, a bit like yours truly. The excellent turkeytravelplanner.com is the best source of further information.

Email your words of wisdom to traveltips@tntmagazine.com. Tip of the Week wins a Lonely Planet guide and other published tips win a fiver.

WIN

Lonely Planet’s Tom Hall will give you the benefit of his infinite wisdom if you email a question to traveltips@tntmagazine.com. If he answers your question, you’ll win a Lonely Planet guide of your choice. TNT readers can get 20 per cent off all Lonely Planet guides valued at more than £12.99. Enter promotional code PTNT01 at shop.lonelyplanet.com.

This is a reader forum — TNT and Lonely Planet accept no responsibility for any loss, injury or inconvenience sustained by anyone using the information provided.

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There are indeed Mark, and many of them are just perfect during winter. Perennial favourite India has lots of likely candidates, including less-well-trodden parts of Goa and Kerala. If you dropped me in India and told me I couldn’t come home until I’d braided my hair, put on some amusing trousers and thoroughly tuned out for a while, I would hop on an internal flight to Port Blair, principal town in the Andaman group of islands, from where I would take a ferry to Havelock Island. It’s got everything: golden sand, low cost, exotic aromas and lots of travellers from Israel, Canada and Germany. Where else? Nicaragua’s Corn Islands and Panama’s Bocas del Toro archipelago, any Thai island you like – depending on what exactly you fancy – and the Gili Islands off Lombok, Indonesia. The benefit of pretty much any of these is that they will be cheaper, even than Egypt, than spots closer to home. In Central America and India you should be able to live well on £20 a day.

I am planning to visit Turkey. Can you suggest any cities that I shouldn’t miss and tell me which food is the best? I’ve heard that travelling by coach is very popular there, but should I book this in advance? Chunbo, via email

ON THE ROAD

WORDS FRANKIE MULLIN

ON THE ROAD

BRIDGE DAY

TRAVEL

West Virginia, USA Oct 16, 2010 BASE jumping madness as 450 nutters leap from the spectacular New River Gorge Bridge watched by crowds of 200,000. Jumpers have only eight seconds to open their parachutes before, well …

» officialbridgeday.com

HALLOWEEN IN THE USA NEW YORK, SAN FRANCISCO, USA WHAT: Halloween is a big

deal in the States, and not just for trick-or-treating brats. Manhattan’s parade attracts more than two million people and the streets and bars will be packed with some seriously inspired costumes. Forget the old sheet-withtwo-holes-in number. WHERE: New York and San Francisco rock Halloween. WHY: Halloween began as a Celtic festival, was hijacked

by the Christian All Hallows’ Eve and finally became the candy, costume and carved pumpkin orgy it is today. WHEN: Oct 31 DO IT BECAUSE: You love dressing up. HOW MUCH: Free

» halloween-nyc.com

TNT online For more upcoming events, see our destination guides at tntmagazine.com/travel

WITH FRANKIE MULLIN

LOCK IT IN TAR BARREL ROLLING Ottery St Mary Nov 5, 2010 otterytourism.org.uk

HOGMANAY Edinburgh, Scotland Dec 31, 2010 edinburghshogmanay.org

VENICE CARNIVAL WORLD CONKER CHAMPIONSHIPS Northamptonshire, UK Oct 10, 2010 Nut-fighting taken to the extreme as ‘modern day gladiators’ battle each other armed with nothing but a conker on a string. Expect school-day nostalgia.

» worldconkerchampionships.com

Where in the world?

Venice, Italy Feb 25-Mar 8, 2011 veniceconnected.com

RIO CARNIVAL Rio de Janeiro, Brazil Mar 4-8, 2011 rio-carnival.net

NEW ORLEANS MARDI GRAS New Orleans, USA Mar 8, 2011 mardigrasneworleans.com

THE TRAVELLER … Chris Matheson, 22, Port Macquarie, NSW What’s your favourite place?

Venice. The weather was perfect, I got lost every day, went in a gondola and swam in the ocean. And your least favourite?

I didn’t like Turkey. Istanbul is too big and dirty. Best thing in London?

Kema Rajandran from Perth, Australia, at Paros, Greek Islands

WIN

Been somewhere good lately? Send us a horizontal photo of yourself with a copy of TNT from anywhere around the world and, if we print it, you’ll win a day trip for two to Bath and Stonehenge with Anderson Tours, valued at £90. » Email your pictures to ontheroad@tntmagazine.com along with your name, where you’re from and where the photo was taken, or see tntmagazine.com/world. Files must be at least 500Kb.

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What do you miss about home?

The ocean. Laidback people – Brits can be ‘interesting’!

Getty Images, Findlay Kember

Sitting down by the river in Hammersmith.

TOP FIVE

FIVE PRISON MUSEUMS

THE INSIDER CARMEL BEATTIE, CEO, COOK ISLANDS TOURISM

ALCATRAZ WHAT: Al “Scarface” Capone and the “Birdman” Robert Stroud both did time at Alcatraz, once home to some of America’s most infamous criminals. Set on an island a short ferry ride from San Francisco, legendary Alcatraz is now open to visitors who can hear the actual voices of the correctional officers and inmates via an award-winning audio tour. SEE: nps.gov/alcatraz

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PORT ARTHUR PENITENTIARY WHAT: Discover more about Australia’s grizzly convict era by visiting the sandstone ruins of Port Arthur penitentiary in Tasmania. Spend a few days visiting the boys’ prison at Point Puer; the Isle of the Dead, a cemetery where 1100 convicts, paupers and free men were buried; and get spooked during the Historic Ghost tour. SEE: portarthur.org.au

CORK GAOL WHAT: Used from 1823 to 1923, Ireland’s Cork Gaol’s cell blocks recreate truly hellish living conditions. Things were so bad during the 1846-49 potato famine that people committed crimes so they’d get food in jail. SEE: corkcitygaol.com

INVERARAY JAIL WHAT: Sited in Argyll, Inveraray Jail housed prisoners and the insane in eight cold and damp cells in the 1820s. Now visitors can experience life as an inmate by being locked in a cell, then trying out the prison beds. SEE: inverarayjail.co.uk

KILMAINHAM JAIL WHAT: Bear witness to Ireland’s turbulent past at this jail in Dublin, which was operational from 1796 until 1924. One of the largest unoccupied gaols in Europe, attractions include an exhibition of its penal history. SEE: heritageireland.ie

TNT Images, DRTA

The best part of my job is … waking up in the morning, walking a few steps down to the beach for a swim in the lagoon with my dog, driving 10 minutes around the island to my beachfront office and having this beautiful destination to market. My most challenging travel experience … was in Rio when I watched the car in front of us being held up at gunpoint and realising that the robbers were 12year-olds! My favourite place in the world is … my deck overlooking the lagoon in Rarotonga, Cook Islands of course, followed by Australia, Brazil (especially Rio), Italy (especially Rome), Dublin and Shanghai. My first big trip was … on the Trans-Siberian railway from Brisbane to London. The next destination on my travel wishlist is … a Mamma Mia-style girls holiday with my two goddaughters and their mothers in Greece. I'm hoping that Pierce Brosnan might be around. My top travel tip is... pack lightly and open yourself up to possibilities. I always pack … my swimsuit. My guilty travel pleasure is … trashy magazines and bubble baths.

JANINE KELSO GIVES A HIGH FIVE TO THESE ROCKIN’ JAIL HOUSES !

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HO HO HO-LIDA

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AYS

Get into the festive spirit by planning your Christmas holiday WORDS SARAH WARWICK

Christmas breaks THE WORLD

o Cliff Richard, Christmas time means mistletoe and wine, but for many of us it also means a ticket to somewhere far away. With up to 10 days off work over the festive season, it’s a great time to get away from the capital. For some of us, of course, this means a trip home but for those who can’t afford the long journey, there are hundreds of other options. Trips abroad can help to take our minds off feeling homesick. Activity holidays in particular, like skiing or snowboarding are a great way to keep busy, and a group holiday or tour can offer the chance to mix with like-minded folk to pull crackers with and, hopefully, make some new buddies.

A WHITE CHRISTMAS A white Christmas, a la Dickens, is what most of us dream of, but what chance is there of actual snow? In the UK, not much – the Met Office gives a figure of six per cent as the chance of any snow falling on Christmas Day. Look further afield though to northern Europe or the alpine regions, and you’re

guaranteed the crunch of snow under your skis. Top of the list for snow bunnies has to be renting a chalet in the Alps, where you and several mates can ride the slopes all day and sip wine in a whirlpool bath until you turn into a warm prune. Try Home Away Holiday Rentals (holiday-rentals.co.uk) which offers more than 57,000 properties in France alone. A week’s stay in a self-catering chalet can cost as little as £150 each between 10 people, although you pay more for food, ski pass and equipment hire. Cheaper still are group snowbound packages from 18-30 tour companies, such as Topdeck, whose week-long all-inclusive ski trips to Les Deux Alpes start on December 26 and cost £679 all-in. Alternatively, opt for a longer snowy adventure with the company’s Baltic Explorer, an eight-day trip visiting Latvia, Russia and Estonia, with Christmas Day spent exploring St Petersburg.

GOING LONG HAUL Where better to celebrate the holy week than the Holy Land itself? Bethlehem, the

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TRAVEL 75

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FLIGHTS • TOURS • HOLIDAYS • ACCOMMODATION

SUN • SNOW • ADVENTURE

FREE Y ENgTisR r te ing

by re £1 entr y online / door on the

SATURDAY, OCTOBER 16 | 9.30am – 6pm London’s Best Sun and Snow Travel Show Ë Travel Deals & Discounts Ë Exclusive Travel Talks Ë Live Travel Auctions

Ibis Hotel Earls Court

Ë Travel Writing & Photography Awards Ë TNT Images Gallery Ë Show Bar

Earl’s Court or West Brompton

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Christmas sells “ out fast so be sure to book early

”

reputation as the party capital of the Middle East. There are a number of trips that take in the highlights of several countries, like an Imaginative Traveller worldwide adventure tour (imaginative-traveller.com). Catholic South America is another place to get a feel for unusual Christmas traditions. In particular, you’ll want to experience the presepio (‘manger’) which is the most important part of Christmas here, often consisting of life-size or larger tableaux of the Christmas story. Try

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site of the very first Christmas, plays host to visitors from all over the world, holding services for Catholic, Protestant, Greek Orthodox, Ethiopian, Armenian and other Christians. Even if you’re not religious, it’s a great time to visit, with markets, processions and lots to see and do. Combine your visit with great sights in Israel and Palestine, including Jerusalem, the Dead Sea, diving in Eilat, and Jericho, the oldest city in the world. Other highlights of the region include Egypt, for the pyramids, desert and scuba diving; Jordan, for the ancient carved city of Petra; or even Lebanon, where its capital, Beirut, has a growing

Holiday in the Alps if you want a white Christmas

Intrepid or Kumuka for their small group tours, where you can get the most out of the group experience without feeling too spoon-fed.

WINTER SUN Just want to flop on a beach? You don’t have to go long-haul or spend a fortune to catch some rays. If you’re missing Christmas in the sunshine, do what many Brits do and jump on a plane to guaranteed 30ºC and do some sun lounging. The Canary Islands are prime low-cost territory and the islands of Tenerife, Gran Canaria and Lanzarote are particular favourites among sun worshippers. Sadly the living’s not as cheap as in pre-Euro days but it’s still a good option for anyone wanting to chill out somewhere hot. Try booking chartered flights (charterflights.co.uk) to get the best

See the pyramid s this Christma s

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Getty Images, TNT Images, J Lightfoot / Robert Harding

A GOOD OL’ KNEES UP

Chill right out: the Loony Doon swim in the Firth River

Scotland is the highlight of New Year celebrations in Britain. There are loads of unique Hogmanay customs, notably fire festivals in Burghead, Stonehaven and Falkland, and street parties in Edinburgh and Glasgow. First Festival Travel (firstfestivaltravel. com/hogmanay.htm) runs a four-day trip that departs December 30 and returns on January 2. The tour takes in the giant Royal Mile Street Party, dancing at the Céilidh, an optional trip to Stirling Castle and the ‘Loony Doon’ swim in the ice-cold Firth River. The Party Professionals offer a similar tour, while Topdeck offers an array of other New Year’s weekender trips to Amsterdam, Berlin, Krakow, Paris and Prague, all over three days. In theory, it doesn’t matter if you forget ‘auld’ acquaintances as you’ll have made so many new ones.

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BIG TRIP deals on flights, or look for package deals with Thomas Cook. Another option for cheap sunshine is The Gambia in West Africa. According to Skyscanner, flights through December start from £299 return, although it may be cheaper overall to choose an all-inclusive package from The Gambia Experience (gambia.co.uk) starting from £399pp, for flights, taxes and accommodation.

MERRY BRIT-MAS If there’s lots of the UK you still haven’t explored then you might think of staying closer to home. Grab a group of mates and go selfcatering on an English farm. Try Organic Holidays (organicholidays.co.uk) for backto-basics cabins, many of which have open fires or wood-burning stoves. Some owners will throw in one of their own organic turkeys to sweeten the deal. Horse

riding, hill walking, and country pubs make for excellent rural activities. Otherwise, use the time to enjoy some of the places you haven’t made it to yet. Also consider heading to the highlands. Door2tour.com does a great seven-day trip (from £429) to Inverness and Fort William with accommodation, meals and transport all included. Whether you decide to spend Crimbo on the beach or in the snow is up to you, but with all these great options there’s no excuse for moping in London. A word of warning, though – Christmas week books out early, so secure your trip now or take a chance on some unpalatable leftovers.

NEXT WEEK: CYCLE AROUND POLAND

Discover beautiful countryside and medieval towns on two wheels

SHOPPING DAYS

Beirut, Lebanon offers festivities with a difference

HATE CHRISTMAS? If you’re feeling resolutely unfestive, there are places you can go to escape Christmas altogether. Muslim countries are the top pick for this: how about a week in Turkey? Despite the name (which is just begging to be the butt of festive jokes) the country’s population doesn’t mark the day in any way, so visitors can feel free to ignore all traditions. Likewise, Morocco, with its souks, camel rides and nights in Berber desert tents, could make for an exotic Christmas Day. Picture yourself riding into the desert on a camel or sampling spicy tajines instead of the traditional turkey. Extremists might even enjoy a trip to

tntmagazine.com

There’s no Santa in Morocco

Riyadh in Saudi Arabia. It might not have a reputation as the most funloving of places but there’s some stunning architecture, the shopping’s good and you’ll certainly escape any of the usual ho ho ho.

Shop ‘til you drop: New York’s got it all

Getty Images, TNT Images

With 102 shopping days left until the big day, you’ve got plenty of time to do your shopping somewhere more exotic than Oxford Street. The Big Apple Top of our list is New York. Not only is it a good excuse to explore the city and catch a show, you can even end up saving money on presents. Apple items, for example, can cost up to 20 per cent less compared with London prices. The earlier you go, the cheaper the flights but avoid ‘Black Friday’ – the day after Thanksgiving (November 26) – which is the busiest and most stressful shopping day of the year. European dreams The European markets are delightful places to spend a few days munching iced-gingerbread and sipping mulled wine while you shop. Visit Bruges, Paris or any German town for outdoor markets, fir trees and fairy lights. Just be careful you don’t get carried away with the festive air and find yourself loaded down with souvenir lederhosen, snow globes and other junk you didn’t mean to buy. Closer to home Hyde Park, Olympia and the Southbank all have their own Euro-style markets from early December. Glasgow’s starts on November 18, in the city’s St Enoch Square, or visit one of the themed events at Rochester (Dicken’s Christmas), Belfast (Christmas Continental) or Caerphilly (Medieval yuletide). See christmasmarkets.com for a full list.

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WANTED HIGHLY SKILLED & EXPERIENCED SITE MANAGERS, CARPENTERS, PAINTERS, LABOURERS & DRYLINERS. Please send your C.V. including copies of CIS card, CSCS card and any Trade Certificates to: recruitment@fitoutuk.com or Fax 0208 963 6901

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trades LABOURERS & CARPENTER required. North London. Call Michael Telephone: 07983 337 545

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If you claim a tax refund, be sure to use a company bonded by the Association of Tax Agents (ATA). If a company is not bonded by the ATA and goes out of business, you could lose your refund. Also, we recommend you avoid agents who charge unusually low commission rates – three such agents have gone out of business in the last 4 years and clients, like yourself, have lost their money.

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ACCOMMODATION 120

renting | sharing | short lets crash pads | hostels

accommodation

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To advertise in this section call 020 7657 1824

sharing

to rent

CANADA WATER House share. Double Room £485pm, All inclusive Sky, Internet, cleaner ph. call 07779106374

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hostels

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hostels

ACCOMMODATION

accommodation The Queen Elizabeth Hostel Hostel Chelsea

121

58 Bagleys Lane, SW6 2BH (6 minute walk from Fulham Broadway station)

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The Back Pack Shack 5 minutes walk from Acton town tube. 4 bedroom dorm from £10 per night. Single and double room available. Hot water, heating and laundry. 2 minutes walk from The Redback. www.backpackshack.co.uk 1 Mill Hill Rd, W3 8JB Call: 07895907078

To advertise in this section call 020 7657 1824 tntmagazine.com

The Vancouver girls I met at SW4 on Saturday, August 28: I

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met you both under the tree when it started to rain, and I guessed correctly you both were Canadian. You both took my breath away, I had to say hi. Can’t remember your names (damn!), but you were the white hooded blonde and the cute brunette dressed in orange with glasses. I took the piss about your accent, you mentioned that I was a nice guy and you wanted to get to know me more. We were dancing together for a while. Wanted to get your number but you just disappeared. Just wondering, can I still get a phone number? Email lookingforvancouvergirls@ hotmail.com. Happy Birthday Chunky Monkey: You’ve weathered

the years well despite your hellraising ways. Looking forward to getting mullered with you on the weekend. Many happy returns. BB Girl. Our white seal: Has anyone been to, or know anyone who was at the Hoover Dan, USA, on August 30? We were there and lost our precious stuffed animal white seal. It travels with us everywhere so holds a lot of sentimental value! If anyone has seen it or knows someone who might, please let me know! There will most definitely be a reward! Email negative45@hotmail.com. Thank you! Kam. To the gorgeous girls from the LC crew: Cheers for a

wickedly debauched weekend – did we really streak through our street in the early hours? Bet the curtain twitchers loved it ha ha. Love you all x

post your message at tntmagazine.com/seeking or email seeking@tntmagazine.com Found passport: Robert

Edgecombe, born Wellington, NZ. Your passport has been found. See tntmagazine.com/ seeking. Last Friday night at Elk Bar: We danced around and laughed a lot/ But then I said I had to trot/ You turned around and BIT MY ARM?!/ and that broke your cute ass charm/ I thought your brown hair was really cute/ And you could have gotten lucky had you been less brute/ So now I’m sitting here with a bruise where you bit/ And am glad I’m free of you little twit/ From the blonde chick just before closing time. To the Ash-hole who decided it’s a good idea to get me so drunk I grew balls and am now writing this on my work computer the morning after, while still drunk: You’ve left

Slutney for Action Town without letting me get what I want. I hope you’re having fun riding that gorgeous Pole but I know you want to put your Flute in my Wahoo. We all know it’s Carl I fancy but you just won’t stop flirting, so live up to your words and show me how good you are in

the sack. You have my number, let me know when you read this and when you want a Slutney instead of a bit of Action Town. PS. Good luck trying to Tame me ;-). TM. See tntmagazine.com/seeking. David Blair from Australia: We assume you live(d) in southwest London as your grandparents sent a birthday card for you to our address. None of our neighbours recognise your name and as there was no return address we opened it to get some clues. Let us know where you live and I will forward it to you. Claire. See tntmagazine.com/ seeking. Haha sad sack: Suck on that one. Karma’s a bitch – and you just got bitch slapped. How does that taste? Polish and German girls at Walkie Shepard’s Bush last Sunday – a poem: To the two

Polish and German girls I met at Shepards Bush Sunday past/ I enjoyed my time with the both of you, a pity not more I could make it last/ I had to go to Soho, you guys were off to a place that served mojitos/ You were both so wonderful and fun, I enjoyed

Desperately Seeking is a reader forum, and all messages should be within the spirit of the page; TNT cannot take responsibility for offence caused. No phone numbers can be printed. Messages may be edited for publication. See tntmagazine.com/seeking

my time with you a ton/ Did I say you were both gorgeous? So much, it was making me nauseous/ I introdocuced my name as James, I am sure if at least one of you gets in contact with me there will be flames/ One last thing before I go, please get in touch with me as you were both so much fun it would mean a lot/ So much so, your cell phone numbers I promised to remember and which I need, remember, I did not. See tntmagazine.com/ seeking. Darnell: After six fan-feckingtastic years in da house, you’ve decided to leave us for the “greater and greener pastures of South Australia”. What has Adelaide got that we can’t give ya, huh?? You always bring lots of fun to the table and your sarcasm will be sorely missed – we love it! Good luck with everything back home chick :-) It’s been emotional! The TNT crew. You need to get your head out of your hole Mr. Mustache from the Elk Bar: I was only

being polite – wouldn’t have cared if I never saw your dodgy haircut again – but you felt the need to be rude as f***! Time to grow up perhaps? You know who I am, Clapham. Lost trainers: My resolution to get fit has been broken at the first hurdle. Instead of running home last Friday I was lured into Belushi’s in Covent Garden, where I promptly forgot all about my shiny white trainers. If anybody found a pair of rather untrendy Reeboks then please get in touch, I’m getting fatter by the day. Email needmytrainers@ hotmail.com. Lucy.

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