TNT Magazine / Issue 1423

WIN ST LUCIA HOLIDAY & ALGARVE FLIGHTS! Live, Work & Travel

December 6-12 2010 Issue 1423 tntmagazine.com

E2-PEAGE FUR 3 R

BUYING THE PERFECT GIFT

YO OLIDAY WINTER H GUIDE

Xmas presents for all budgets JET AWAY FOR 2011

Top 10 cities for New Year’s Eve CHRISTMAS TASTE TEST

Who’s king of festive treats?

£1 where sold

THE STRANGE WORLD OF

TIM MINCHIN The comic on why he’s out to offend at his arena show

+ JOBS ■ SPORT ■ LONDON ■ NEWS ■ CINEMA ■ FREIGHT

ANGLO PACIFIC SHIPPING & TAX 30th Anniversary OVER 500,000 SATISFIED CUSTOMERS HAVE ALREADY TRUSTED THEIR POSSESSIONS TO ANGLO PACIFIC, LONDON’S LEADING SHIPPERS EXCESS BAGGAGE > Free supply of tea cartons and bubble > Free delivery/collection within M25 > By sea/air/road worldwide > Money Back Guarantee HOUSEHOLD REMOVALS > Free home survey, no obligation > Packed by skilled professionals > Shared or exclusive containers > Motor car/bike specialist shippers TAX REBATES > Average refund £903 secured last year 2 commission > Online Tax Pack, only 15% MONEY TRANSFERS > Competitive exchange rates FINANCIAL PROTECTION > Bonded by the British Association of Removers > Bonded by the Association of Tax Agents > FIDI Accredited International Mover

www.anglopacific.co.uk SO BEFORE YOU CHECK OUT OF EUROPE CHECK OUT ANGLO PACIFIC

FREEPHONE 0800 328 2382 Anglo Pacific International Plc, 5/9 Willen Field Road, Park Royal, London, NW10 7BQ Email: info@anglopacific.co.uk Hours: Mon-Fri 8.30am - 6.00pm Sat 9am-1pm

this week December 6-12 / Issue 1423 Free every Monday tntmagazine.com

EDITOR’S LETTER Choosing Christmas gifts can be a painful task – there are some people who are impossible to buy for. With this in mind, we speak to three experts who reveal how to select the perfect present (P10). After you’ve got that sussed, turn to P12 for our threepage gift guide, where you’re bound to find something suitable.

If you’ve not planned New Year’s Eve yet, check out our guide to the top 10 cities (P59) to make sure you see in 2011 with a bang. Enjoy!

74 Immerse yourself in the colour and the beauty of Brazil

57 TRAVEL

CAROL DRIVER

6 LONDON 6 London Life 8 Food & Drink 10 PRESENT AND CORRECT: We help you choose that perfect gift 12 CHRISTMAS GIFT GUIDE: A range of presents at a range of prices 15 TASTE SENSATIONS: The best in mince pies, cheese, wine and more 18 Spotted 20 Silly Buggers

23 ENTERTAINMENT 23 24 25 26

Celebrity News TNT Life Look Who’s Talking: Michael Winslow ‘OH MY GOD’: Tim Minchin’s not adverse to a bit of controversy 28 Cinema 29 Culture

30 MUSIC & CLUBS 30 Music Listings 31 Music 34 Clubbing Listings 35 Clubbing

59 Your guide to the world’s best NYE parties

36 NEWS & SPORT 36 37 39 41 42 43 44 46

57 Global Vision 59 OUT WITH A BANG: Our top ten cities to see in the New Year 62 Late Deals 63 TNTT Weekender: Xmas in Wales 64 Hotshots 66 ROMANIA BITES BACK: On the vampire trail in Transylvania 68 Travel Tips 71 Travel News 72 On The Road 73 Top Five 74 BLAME IT ON RIO: Life sure is good on the east coast of Brazil 63 Get festive in Wales

Australia News New Zealand News South Africa News The Week In Sport Rugby Football Cricket ONE IN A MILLION: Saffa Seth Webber dons his poker face

49 CAREERS & MONEY 49 Careers 50 THE LONG WAY ROUND: get work as a long-haul tour guide 51 Job Of The Week 54 Money

REGULARS 4 Letters 16 Wins 114 Desperately Seeking 26 Tim Minchin provides food for thought

50 See the world … and get paid for it

YOUR SAY EDITORIAL Editor Carol Driver Sub-editor Jahn Vannisselroy Travel editor Janine Kelso Sport editor Tom Sturrock Music editor Alison Grinter Web editor Frankie Mullin Staff writer Rebecca Kent Editorial assistant Inger Smith

London is home ... for now

I’ve just returned from 10 days back home in Australia.

The weather was perfect, people were pleased to see me and eager to catch up over beers and BBQs. As my trip neared the end, people started to remind of the things that would be facing me back in London: bad weather, warm beer, crowds and monotony of work. I should have been dreading it. But I wasn’t.

The secret is this; I love London.

I love the crowds and I don’t even mind the weather.

It’ll never be home. But that doesn’t matter. Home will wait for me until I’m ready to settle. Until then, I’m having too much fun.

Steve, London SW6

Busy and crowded ... but London is fun

DIGITAL & IT Head of digital marketing and development Syed Ahmad IT manager Stephen Dann ART & PICTURES Art director Shabir Mahmood Senior Designer Astrid Breacker Designer Laura Doyle Picture researcher Laila Pacheco SALES Head of marketing and sales Jim Zambrano Acting Sales Manager Jaqui Ward Portfolio Manager Stephen Warman Sales Executives Matt Syder | James Berry | Tyler Harrison | Eddie Clinton | Thomas Wheeler | Stephen Doyle Sales Administrator Abby Nightingale MARKETING & EVENTS Marketing and events assistant Phoebe Cherrill Social media co-ordinator Daniel Cape ACCOUNTS Finance director Nick Crampton Accounts Margaret Roberts | Alexandra Buchlakova PRODUCTION Head of production Libby West Production manager Jon Cooke Production assistant Justine Mackay TNT PUBLISHING CEO Kevin Ellis Chairman Ken Hurst Receptionist Lisa Lowe TNT Publishing Ltd Emblem Direct Ltd PRINTED BY St Ives Web Ltd NEWS AAP SAPA NZPA PICTURES AAP AP Alamy Getty Images NZPA PA Photos Photolibrary.com Pictures Colour Library Reuters Rex Features Robert Harding SAPA TNT Images PUBLISHER

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Where in the world have you travelled where you thought had the friendliest people?

I always enjoy going to locations and the first thing you see as you exit the plane is smiling faces as you join the immigration line, and a warm reception from the locals as you leave the airport.

Of course, that is just a start.

I’d love to hear other readers’ stories about some of the places they’ve been that have such friendly people?

Smithmiller6, tntmagazine.com

travel ideas from there. We have been looking at buses and trains but was hoping that people might have done it or are planning on doing it and know some great tips for us.

Anything will be helpful!

Kiralee, via tntmagazine.com

DO EASTERN EUROPE TOURS RUN IN APRIL? I have been trying to find a tour for Eastern Europe next year in April but with no luck.

Anyone know if any run this month? Otherwise, is it fairly easy to travel Poland, Slovakia and Hungary alone?

Sara Lockie, via tntmagazine

CALL FOR TOUR TIPS! My boyfriend and I are moving from London to Sweden and we are looking to travel through Europe to get there.

So far we have bought a Eurostar ticket to Brussels, but I am hoping that someone could give me some cheap

NEXT WEEK IN

BEST AREA TO SETTLE? I am a Kiwi and I have lived all over London for nine years and have finally settled in Eltham Greenwich SE9.

Other areas which have been great to live in include Fulham, Putney and Wanstead E11 (not to be confused with

Wandsworth which isn’t bad either).

What other areas would you recommend for Antipodeans which are safe, close to the city, have good transport and are not too expensive on a travellers’ budget?

Chris Bell, via tntmagazine.com

MOVING DEAL …

I am moving to London from Denmark in the summer, but I can’t bring any furniture with me. Is anyone leaving around this time as I’d like to do a deal with you to buy your goods.

Jessica Robbinson, tntmagazine.com

WIN!

letters@tntmagazine.com

letters@tntmagazine.com Letter of the week wins a three-day tour of Ireland from Shamrocker (shamockeradventures.com), valued at £119. Letters may be edited.

Prize is not transferable. Your Say is a reader forum and does not represent the opinions of TNT or its staff.

Christmas

Travel

Alternative ideas for the festive season

Dog sledding in La Rosiere

Getty Images, TNT Images

TNT Magazine is printed on paper from sustainable forests. There is no business connection between the proprietors of this magazine and TNT Ltd, the worldwide transportation group. Copyright here and abroad of all original materials is held by TNT Magazine. Reproduction in whole or part is forbidden, except with permission of the publishers. Registered as a newspaper at the Post Office.

HAVE YOU FOUND THE FRIENDLIEST COUNTRY?

LETTER OF THE WEEK

LONDON LIFE

TNT’S FISHY FEET

Something fishy... Heather braves the treatment

LONDON REVIEW: FISH THERAPY

Getty Images

It’s a concept that seems to have gripped London.

So much so, Aqua Sheko is opening a second fish therapy spa this week.

I was intrigued, so I booked myself in to have hundreds of tiny fish sucking the dead skin off my feet.

Garra Rufa fish, also known as ‘doctor fish’, have little suction cup mouths which they use to suck up dead skin cells. This in turn gives a light, exfoliating massage. It’s a win-win, apparently. With my trousers

rolled up, I feel like I’m on I’m A Celebrity... My initial reaction is “eww!”

It is seriously bizarre. The fish feast on my feet like it’s a Sunday roast. It’s not ticklish, but it’s a surreal experience – especially when they squeeze through your toes.

However, despite my initial hesitations, I don’t want the treatment to end – and my feet are left super-soft. Well worth the experience!

HEATHER VANDENENGEL

» 29 Frith Street, Soho, W1D Leicester Square (aquas heko.co.uk) from £17.

UK trips

Interview

The hunt for the Loch Ness monster

We speak to Jackie Chan

LONDON LIFE

WHAT’S ON Tom Sturrock PICKS THE BEST OF LONDON THIS WEEK

LONDON

CHOCOLATE FESTIVAL FREE WHAT: It does what it says on the tin – basically desserts, sweets and pastries from London’s fanciest restaurants are on show, with their own stalls, as well as areas dedicated to workshops and tastings.

WHEN: December 10-12.

DO IT BECAUSE: If you’ve got a sweet tooth, or need to wrap up your Christmas shopping, then this is the event for you.

You’ll find exotic flavours and eye-popping designs – chocolate like you’ve never seen it before.

6

»

Southbank Centre, Belvedere Road, SE1 (festivalchocolate.co.uk).

A beacon for design geeks

Capital idea: Design Museum Whether you’re into architecture, fashion, technology or homeware, London’s Design Museum is a remarkable resource and an absolute assault on the senses of anyone who is keen on innovative, eyecatching objects.

Currently, the museum is hosting an exhibition of the works of John Pawson, who gets written up as “the father of architectural minimalism”.

But don’t worry – you don’t need to know what that means

to be impressed by the works.

The museum excels at mapping the evolution of an idea and its expression, expertly charting the way furniture, audio-visual gear, kitchenware – anything, really – has gone through different fads and how contemporary design continues to borrow inspiration from the past. TS

Waterloo

ROSS NOBLE FROM £23

CINDERELLA FROM £10

The Geordie stand-up has been one of this country’s in-demand comedians for the past decade.

This acclaimed production transposes the familiar fairytale into Blitz-ravaged London of the Second World War. Truly epic stuff.

» HMV Apollo, Queen Caroline St, W6 9QH Hammersmith (hmvtickets.com).

Dec 12-13

» Sadler’s Wells, Rosebery Avenue, EC1R 4TN Angel (sadlerswells.com). Until Jan 23

SANZIO CHRISTMAS MENU

4 COURSES only

£16.95

» Shad Thames, SE1 2YD London Bridge (design museum.org).

GREAT FOR: DESIGN GEEKS

Ross Noble

INCLUDES ALL YOUR ITALIAN FAVOURITES + MORE!

BRITAIN EXPLAINED CLAPHAM RAILWAY DISASTER a nightmarish scene, administering trackside surgery to some horrifically injured victims.

An inquiry found that a wiring problem caused the pile-up, with the at-fault worker having worked 13 weeks straight with only one day off.

Recommendations were made to upgrade safety equipment across the rail network, but it was deemed too expensive by successive governments. TS

CONTACT US TO BOOK YOUR TABLE! Sanzio 26 Station Parade London NW2 4NH Tel: 0208 830 5221

TNT Images/Getty Images

This week 22 years ago, three trains collided in peak hour at Clapham Junction, which was then Europe’s busiest railway interchange, killing 35 passengers.

The first collision, one train rear-ending another, occurred due to a signal failure. Shortly after, a third train ploughed into the wreckage, sending carriages hurtling into the air before crashing back on to the ground. Emergency services crews were confronted with

GIVE THE GIFT OF ADVENTURE All aboard the Chocolate Express

HAMLET FROM ÂŁ10 Poor old Hamlet. Is he gay?

Is he crazy? Or maybe a bit of both? Head down to the prestigious National Theatre and make up your own mind.

Be warned though: it’s not a happy ending.

Âť National Theatre, South Bank, SE1 9PX Waterloo (nationaltheatre.org.uk).

Until Jan 9

ST PAUL’S XMAS CAROLS AND SERVICES FREE It’s all very traditional but if you haven’t yet explored one of London’s most spectacular, dramatic buildings, then this is a good excuse. There are regular services between now and Christmas.

Beanies from ÂŁ12.99

Windfleece Gloves

ÂŁ24.99

 St Paul’s Cathedral, EC4M 8AD St Paul’s (stpauls.co. uk). Until Jan 6 Microfibre Towels S-XL › from

ÂŁ7

.99

Solar Dynamo Hand Torch

Kit Case Deluxe

ÂŁ14

.99

ÂŁ14.99

100s more 3 for 2 offers in-store & online

DISCOVER TRAVEL Over 80,000 sold worldwide

SAVE

ÂŁ60

TNT Images/ Getty Images

Christmas shoppers descend on Covent Garden

SAVE

CHRISTMAS LOVE MARKET FREE

JEFF WAYNE’S WAR OF THE WORLDS FROM £42

A cracking market that goes up a notch, Come for the food and stay for the light display that illuminates the whole piazza when people pash under the mistletoe.

HG Wells’s classic sci-fi tale comes alive on stage, backed by a full orchestra. Jason Donovan is in it as well. He seems to pop up in the strangest places, doesn’t he?

Âť Covent Garden Piazza,

Âť The O2 Arena, Peninsula

Covent Garden WC2E 9DD (coventgardenlife.com).

Until Jan 3

North Square, SE10 0BB Greenwich (thewarof theworlds.com). Dec 12

ÂŁ7

Interloper Pack Best-selling travel pack with fully customisable harness.

65, 70 & 75L was from ÂŁ169.99

from only

ÂŁ109.99

Kotuku Fleece therma-loftŽ eece Women: 8-16 › Black, Lizard, Ruby Red Men: S-XL › Black, Lizard, Ruby Red

was ÂŁ29.99

.99

only ÂŁ22

Lots more Christmas & winter offers in-store LONDON STORE ADDRESSES Unit 1142, Westfield London Shopping Centre, W12 7GG 1-2 Berners Street, London, W1T 3LA 26 Henrietta Street, Covent Garden, WC2E 8NA Unit 11 Bishops Square, Brushfield St, Spitalfields, E1 6EG

Buy online www.kathmandu.co.uk

FOOD & DRINK

QUICK BITES... Peter Gordon, Kopapa founder

LONDON

Peter Gordon is launching Kopapa which is set to open its doors on December 7 in Seven Dials, Covent Garden, WC2 (see: kopapa.co.uk)

WHO’S BEHIND KOPAPA? Peter and Michael McGrath who own The Providores, plus Adam Wills and Brandon Allen – two of the founders of Gourmet Burger Kitchen.

8

WHAT FOOD IS ON OFFER? It’s still a work in progress, but we’ll start with some of The Providores’ favourites – deepfried egg with garam masala, duck and Sichuan pepper spring rolls with tamarind aioli, smoked chicken laksa, and flourless chocolate cake with manuka honey yoghurt cream. New Zealand-born Leigh Hartnett is head chef.

FOOD INFLUENCES? The world. Anything is possible, so long as it tastes good and is sustainable.

DESCRIBE THE SCENE We’ll have a marble bar which seats 12, there are some bookable tables but mostly walkins. The atmosphere will be busy. buzzy and we’ll have CD tapas-sized dishes.

Restaurant review Pho

★★★★★ 163-165 Wardour Street, W1F 8WN, (02074 343 938; phocafe.co.uk) Tottenham Court Rd

THE SCENE Pho’s trendy atmosphere is underscored by funky light fittings and indie background music making it the perfect haunt for the young, good-looking Soho-ites who dine here. A traditional Vietnamese canteen this ain’t.

THE MENU We start with goi cuon, veggie summer roles which are as fresh and fragrant as their name would suggest.

Less impressive are the spongy spring rolls which don’t come with nearly enough lettuce or mint. The rest of the meal continues in this hit-and-miss vein. For mains the sweet, spicy goi du du – papaya salad – deserves a special mention as one of the best salads I’ve ever tasted. My friend’s Pho xao chay, wok fried flat rice noodles with veggies, mushrooms and

UNDERGROUND BARS CELLAR DOOR

Pho far, Pho good

tofu is tasty, but my own bun tom hue – hot and spicy soup with prawns – lacks punch.

The banana fritters we order for dessert are melt-in-themouth delicious but the pandan pancake is a little on the rubbery side. We wash all this down with a cup of Pho’s exclusive, rare chon ca phe – coffee which has been eaten, digested and passed through weasels to enhance its flavour.

Despite our reservations the

“weasel-poo coffee”, as we take to calling it, is sublimely delicate and aromatic.

BILL PLEASE Starters begin at £3.95 while the cheapest bowl of Pho soup will set you back £6.95. You could easily eat a three-course meal, including alcohol, for under £30.

VERDICT A Vietnamese dining experience to remember – just choose carefully. ALISON GRINTER

This converted toilet not only has the coolest address, Zero Aldwych, but also the hippest underground vibe.

See live acts every night, but arrive early to get a table.

See cellardoor.biz

Barts It’s an exclusive 1920s purlieu mysteroiusly situated “somewhere on Sloane Avenue”. Dress to impress, look for the black door and act aloof. See barts-london

606 Club

tntmagazine.com

TNT images, Kang Leong

Get through barred doors, buzzers and a barman and you’re rewarded with spectacular jazz at this musician’s haunt in Chelsea. 606club.co.uk HV

PRESENT AND CORRECT We’ve called in the experts: A personal shopper, a psychologist and a psychic get Christmas shopping wrapped up for you WORDS FRANKIE MULLIN

tntmagazine.com

RETURNING GOODS: YOUR RIGHTS

H

TNT Images

ow many times has that beautiful hand-painted box you gave your brother for Christmas mysteriously disappeared

by New Year’s Day? How baffling was it when your boyfriend wasn’t happy with the psychotherapy vouchers you so kindly bought him?

However good your intentions, buying people something they really want is a minefield. To help you get it right this Chrimbo, we’ve roped in a personal shopper, a psychologist and, wait for it, a psychic. Here’s how they’d do it …

THE PROFESSIONAL Personal shopper Gabrielle Teare has shopped for pretty much everyone (including lots of celebs, don’t you know) so she’s got this lark pretty sussed.

“People shop badly, even for themselves. We only wear 20 per cent of the clothes we buy so you can imagine how much worse it gets when we try to shop for someone else.

“The secret of a good present is to buy people a luxury version of what

» See: gabrielleteare.com

THE PSYCHOLOGIST Personal development expert Phil Parker understands what’s going on in people’s heads, which has to make him good at buying for them.

“Ask yourself what you want the present to say about you. Don’t buy things because you want to prove how much money you’ve got or show off how good you are at arts and crafts.

Most people “ shop badly, even for themselves ” “Make sure you’re not buying something to make yourself look good, because you want to use it yourself or because everyone else is buying it.

“It’s easier to be creative when you’re buying a tricky present if you think about someone you know who is good at that sort of thing. Imagine what they would do, and try to think with their head as you shop.

“Think about what would be a useful present going into the New Year.

“If someone is impossible to shop for, get them a voucher or just ask them what they want!

“There’s no subtle psychological way

of finding out what someone wants for Christmas. Just don’t set yourself up by saying, ‘I’ve got you the most amazing present.’ Disappointment will be guaranteed.

“Finally, stay calm. It’s really not that important.”

» See:philparker.org

THE PSYCHIC Surely buying presents is like falling off a Yule log if you’re psychic like Michelle Howcroft, a tutor at the London College of Psychics.

“A lot of people are into shopping angels.

You can call upon your angel and say ‘I’ve got to buy my dad a present. Direct me to a shop!’

“As you’re walking along the street you may get a warm, fuzzy feeling in your belly and that is you linking up to a higher dimension. Pay attention to that feeling and see which shop it leads you into.

“Once you’re in a shop rummaging you may feel tingling or warmth in your hands as you go along the rail and touch an item. That means you’re near that perfect present!

“Everyone has psychic ability but most people don’t use it.”

» See: collegeofpsychicstudies.co.uk

LONDON’S WORSTEVER CHRISTMAS PRESENTS MARINA FERRÉ, 22, BORDEAUX, FRANCE: “A fragrance that I hate.

Someone gives it to me every year.”

CHRISTIAN ROTLHARDT, 38, BASEL, GERMANY: “A stupid paperweight with Christmas scenery and snowflakes.”

MARIA ALVAREZ, 19, MADRID, SPAIN: “A lump of coal, it was a joke though.”

KOURTAIBA ALHSATIB, 30, DAMASCUS, SYRIA: “A Michael Moore documentary.”

LIZ STUART, 37, EARL’S COURT, LONDON: “Very ugly gold mules.

Not something I would ever wear!”

tntmagazine.com

LONDON

• You have the right to claim your money back if something’s faulty or doesn’t do what it says it does, provided you do so within “reasonable” time.

The length of time classed as reasonable will depend on the product and the fault.

• If you just change your mind about something you’ve bought in a shop then you do not have an automatic right to return it. Check the shop’s policy before you buy – most big outlets offer a refund, credit note or will exchange if you return the item within a certain time period.

• If you buy online, you can return goods within 7 days even if you just change your mind.

you know they like. For example, if someone loves chocolate and usually eats Cadbury’s, get them a box of Belgian chocolates.

“Get people something they can’t fail to like. If someone’s into music, buy them a CD. “Women are easy because you can get them something cosmetic. Men are harder and women often resort to buying them socks, which is crazy. Good presents that aren’t expensive are cashmere jumpers or nice coffee-table books.

“My tips for Christmas shopping are not to leave it until the last minute and not to buy people something because you want it.”

11

CHRISTMAS GIFT GUIDE - LESS THAN £25

ARCADE PAY TO PLAY MONEY BOX £14.99. Buy online at

CERAMIC CHOCOLATE FONDUE SET £7.99. Buy at Argos

HANDBOUND DIARIES £ 19.50.

Buy at Shepherds Bookbinders (bookbinding.co.uk )

at hobbycraft.co.uk

LET’S FLY AWAY NECKLACE

GERSHON POM BEANIE

PAPER AIRPLANE 2011 CALENDAR £10.99. Buy online

24studio.co.uk

(argos.co.uk)

TAXI BOOKEND £18. Buy from London Transport Museum (ltmuseum.co.uk)

See universitygames.com

£15.90. Buy online at temporarysecretary.com

HANG OUT HAMMOCK FOR THE TRAVELLER £9.99. Buy at

A ONE-HOUR COCKTAIL LESSON VOUCHER £19. Buy

JAPANESE FRIENDSHIP DOLLS PAINTING KIT £14.99. Buy online

HENRY AND HETTY DESKTOP VACUUM CLEANER £ 12.99. Buy

MR & MRS GAME - DO YOU KNOW YOUR PARTNER? £14.99.

£20. Buy at Upperplay (upperplayground.com)

Stanfords (stanfords.co.uk)

online at the-peacock-bar.co.uk

at hobbycraft.co.uk

online at 24studio.co.uk

CREATIVE CANDLE MAKING SET £24.99. Buy online at

FORMULA FUN SALT & PEPPER SET £15. Buy at Urban Outfitters

JAMIE’S 30-MINUTE MEALS COOKBOOK £13. Buy online at

PATCHWORK OWL CUSHION

hobbycraft.co.uk

(urbanoutfitters.co.uk)

amazon.co.uk

£24. Buy at urbanoutfitters.co.uk (web exclusive)

BEST FOR STOCKING FILLERS

DIGITAL VIDEO MEMO FRIDGE MAGNET £29.99. Buy online at iwantoneofthose.com

tntmagazine.com

DESIGNER TOILET ROLLS £8.95 for a three-pack. Buy online at thedesignertoiletrollcompany.co.uk

HAYNES PETROL CAN HIP FLASK £14.99. Buy at WHSmith (whsmith.co.uk)

HANDBAG LIGHT GADGET £6.99. Buy at WHSmith (whsmith.co.uk)

CHRISTMAS GIFT GUIDE - LESS THAN £50

£34.99. See outwell.co.uk for UK stockists.

SILK LINED LEATHER GLOVES WITH BUTTONS £39. Buy at John Lewis (johnlewis.com)

ESPRESSO CUPS TUBE MAP £32.99. Buy at London Transport Museum (ltmuseum.co.uk)

ANTIQUE DETAIL CROC SATCHEL £42. Buy at Urban Outfitters (urbanoutfitters.co.uk)

LONDON

PICNIC SHOULDER BAG

13

GORILLA POD FOR SLR CAMERAS £36.95. Buy online at joby.com

LEATHERMAN BLAST TOOL

DOCTOR WHO BOX SET SERIES 1-4 £48.45. Buy online at bbcshop.com

SILVER CUBIC ZIRCONIA STUD EARRINGS £30. Buy at Ernest

£49.95. Buy at Cotswold Outdoor (cotswoldoutdoor.com)

Jones (ernestjones.co.uk)

CUSTOMISE YOUR OWN BEERBOX From £33 for 12 beers.

AFTERNOON TEA AT THE CONNAUGHT £40. Buy online

Buy online at realbeerbox.co.uk

at the-connaught.co.uk

PINK HEART TEAPOT £29.95.

LILY POND SUSHI SET - PLATE AND CHOPSTICKS £49. Buy

Buy at Tea Palace Covent Garden (teapalace.co.uk)

online at madeindesign.co.uk

UNION JACK HELMET £45. Buy at Cyclechic - appointments only (see cyclechic.co.uk)

LEGO STAR WARS MILLENNIUM FALCON £36.

STRIPED BUTTON SWEATER IN LAMBSWOOL £41.65. Buy at GAP (thegap.co.uk)

Buy at Hamleys (hamleys.com)

BRITISH FILM INSTITUTE GIFT MEMBERSHIP £40. Buy at BFI Filmstore (filmstore.bfi.org.uk)

BEST FOR GEEKS

MYGRID CHARGING PAD FOR MOBILE DEVICES £39.99. Buy

IDUCK FLOATING WIRELESS SPEAKER £24.99. Buy online at

online at duracelldirect.co.uk

iwantoneofthose.com

PROFESSIONAL WALKIE TALKIE £89.99. Buy online at maplin.co.uk

tntmagazine.com

CHRISTMAS GIFT GUIDE - LESS THAN £100

SONY MDRNC40 NOISE CANCELLING HEADPHONES £79. Buy online at sony.co.uk

WATERFALL WINE CHILLER £59.99. Buy online at iwantoneofthose.com

VIVIENNE WESTWOOD TARTAN TIE £65. Buy at Vivienne Westwood

STORIO ANIMATED E-BOOK FOR 3-7 YEAR OLDS £ 59.99.

(viviennewestwood.co.uk)

Buy online at vtechuk.com

KOSY KOO - HANDMADE SLIPPERS £68.93. Buy online

I.COMFORT MASSAGE CUSHION £79.99. Buy online

SENSEO QUADRANTE STYLISH COFFEE MAKER

TOKYOFLASH FIRE LED WRIST WATCH £52.55. Buy online at

at woolenstocks.com

at oregonscientific.co.uk

£100. Buy at Argos (argos.co.uk)

tokyoflash.com

HUGO BOSS SIENA BILLFOLD

I-WAKE-UP SUNRISE CLOCK DAWN SIMULATOR £99.99. Buy

DREAMWORKS ANIMATION ULTIMATE DVD COLLECTION

WHEELYBUG - FOR 1-5 YEAR OLDS £55-£65. Buy online at hippychick.com

LEATHER WALLET £85. Buy at Selfridges (selfridges.com)

online at oregonscientific.co.uk

£99.99. See paramount.com

OVER

£100

ALASKA THROW - HIGH QUALITY FAUX FUR £95. Buy

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LONDON 15

TASTE SENSATIONS Here’s our top festive treats to adorn your Christmas table WORDS INGER SMITH

MINCE PIES

XMAS PUDDING

CHEESE

CHOCOLATE

XMAS DRINKS

1. TESCO FINEST Crumbly

1. MATTHEW WALKER

1. PAXTON & WHITFIELD

1. CHOCOCO Beautiful,

pastry, moist mince centre, sugar and booze levels just right. £2 for six. See: tesco.com

BROWN Moist, nutty

Strong tasty cheeses with real depth. From £19.50/kg. See: paxton andwhitfield.co.uk

fresh, handmade pieces of art – divine! £24.95 for 16 pieces (incl. p&p).

See: chococo.com

1. ASDA E. S. 2002 VINTAGE CHAMPAGNE

2. SAINSBURY’S CHEESE

2. TESCO FINEST TRUFFLE

LOVERS Lots of yummy

BALLS

2. BETTY’S Pretty, jammy

pies with generous filling. £9 + p&p for 12. See: bettys.co.uk 3. ASDA EXTRA SPECIAL

Melt-in-mouth pastry, with plenty of mince.

Sweet and boozy. £1.65 for six. See: asda.com 4. SAINSBURY’S TASTE THE

TNT Images, Shaun Loader

DIFFERENCE Moist filling

with a nice pastry, lots of mince – and plenty of brandy. £1.99 for nine.

See: sainsburys.co.uk

with fruit. Tastes home-made. £6.99. See: matthewwalkerchr istmaspuddings.com 2. HARVEY NICHOLS CHAMPAGNE PUDDING

Light, more like a cake than a pudding. £6.95.

See: harveynichols.co.uk 3. TESCO FINEST Gluey

sludge with fruit and almond, plus a fair share of booze. £10.

See: tesco.com 4. ICED FRUIT PARCEL ASDA EXTRA SPECIAL

flavours in this cheese assortment. £6. See: sainsburys.co.uk

Swiss chocolate balls with a creamy filling. £3 for 180g.

See: tesco.com

3. ASDA EXTRA SPECIAL

3. ASDA COLLECTION

A nice selection of five different cheeses. The Swiss Gruyere is a gem. £10. See: asda.com

A pretty little selection. £4.67 for 200g. See: asda.com

4. LA FROMAGERIE VACHERIN DU MONT D’OR

DIFFERENCE BELGIAN

A pretty-but-bland cake covered in marzipan. £9. See: asda.com

A creamy, mild cheese with a nutty flavour. £5-£6 per kg. See: lafromagerie.co.uk

PIES Dry, a bit like

5. SAINSBURY’S TASTE THE

5. TESCO’S FINEST Plastic

cardboard. Not enough filling. £5.95 for 12. See harveynichols.co.uk

DIFFERENCE Dry and

texture and very little flavour to these cheeses. £6.50. See: tesco.com

5. HARVEY NICHOLS MINI

tasteless. £9.99. See: sainsburys.co.uk

BELGIAN

4. SAINSBURYS TASTE THE

for

those who like dark choc. £2.59 for 200g.

See: sainsburys.com

Fruity with a dry finish, perfect for celebration. £18.98. See: asda.com 2. SAINSBURY’S TASTE THE DIFFERENCE MULLED WINE

A warming blend of tempranillo, merlot and spices. £5.99. See: sainsburys.co.uk 3. HARVEYS CHRISTMAS ALE A full flavour 8.1% dark beer. 24 bottles for £41.52 + p&p. See: harveysonline.co.uk 4. TESCO FINEST IRISH

A delish malt whiskey and cream blend. £18. See: tesco.com

CREAM LIQUEUR

5. CHOCOLATE CRAFT CHRISTMAS PUDDINGS

5. SHEPHERD NEAM

Chocolate and Xmas pudding combo with cognac. £5.50 for 70g.

See: harveynichols.co.uk

An easy-to-drink 7% Christmas beer. 12 for £27.50 + p&p. See: shepherdneame.co.uk

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TNT’S HUGE CHRISTMAS

RETURN FLIGHTS FOR TWO TO THE ALGARVE

GOLDEN PRIZE see website for details

TNT has teamed up with award-winning low fares airline Monarch to offer two lucky readers the chance to win a pair of return flights to The Algarve.

You and a friend will jet off in style to the ancient Portuguese city of Faro, ideal for discovering the hidden gems of The Algarve. With glorious year-round sunshine, excellent sandy beaches and an abundance of attractive shops and restaurants there is plenty to see and do. Sports fans are also spoilt for choice – top quality golf courses, tennis, windsurfing and horse riding are all available.

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» See: monarch.co.uk

SEVEN NIGHTS IN SAINT LUCIA To celebrate its 21st birthday, Windjammer Landing Villa Beach Resort in Saint Lucia has teamed up with TNT to offer one lucky reader and a guest a seven-night holiday, worth more than £1500.

The winner will be staying in a beautiful Anthurium Lily Suite with stunning views over the Caribbean Sea and white sand beach.

A personal ambassador will be on hand to ensure you are well catered for, whether you’re looking for adventure or relaxation.

Celebrities such as Claudia Winkleman, Richard and Judy and Sherrie Hewson have

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been spotted enjoying the resort’s award-winning beach.

Windjammer Landing has undergone a $500,000 refurbishment, restoring a number of villas to the way they were originally designed.

Windjammer has hosted more than 5000 weddings in the last 21 years, and is ideal for romantic getaways.

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GOLDEN PRIZE see website for details

GIVEAWAY

HOW TO ENTER

Go to tntmagazine.com/competitions. See webpage for terms and conditions.

Winners will be selected at random

LEGALLY BLONDE THE MUSICAL PRIZE PACKS TNT has teamed up with Get Into London Theatre to give two readers a pair of topprice tickets to Legally Blonde The Musical,l a programme and a special gift each.

The uplifting show tells the story of college sweetheart and homecoming queen Elle Woods, who just doesn’t take ‘no’ for an answer. When her boyfriend dumps her for someone serious, Elle decides to put down the credit card, hit the books and head for Harvard Law School to prove

she’s not just an airhead.

Starring Sheridan Smith until January 8, and also starring Denise Van Outen.

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AN ADRENALINE ADVENTURE

HOTEL STAY & DINNER

TNT has teamed up with Smartbox, the gift experience company, to give one lucky reader an amazing Adrenaline Smartbox worth £129. The box is filled with a selection of over 180 different experiences, such as powerboating and ice climbing, making it the ideal gift for all experience junkies.

Smartbox is the perfect gift for any occasion, with 15 themed boxes offering a variety of experiences, ranging from adrenaline pumping activities to relaxing spa treatments and romantic escapes, available all over the UK and Ireland.

Prices start from just £39.95.

One lucky reader will win an overnight stay for two in a suite at the historic Mercure Southampton Centre Dolphin Hotel including breakfast and a three-course dinner in their Signature Restaurant. Located in the heart of the city, the hotel has hosted notable guests since the 1400s including Queen Victoria, Admiral Lord Nelson and Jane Austen. Following an extensive refurbishment, it’s now as rich in cool, chic styling and contemporary comforts as it is in historic architectural features, and offers 90 contemporary style guest rooms, the Signature Restaurant, a bar, lounge and event rooms. » See: See mercure.com e cu e co

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A VODKA PARTY PACK

Win a £50 GO-SIM card, including £34 airtime. With GO-SIM, you can save up to 85 per cent when calling from overseas in 175 countries. You also get free incoming calls in over 75 countries, when abroad. » See: ee gosim.com/tnt gos co /

Win a cocktail book, two shot glasses, and two bottles of Camitz Sparkling Vodka.

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A KIWI T-SHIRT

A FREE-RANGE TURKEY

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WIN MORE 4 16 28 35 64 64 68 72

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PREVIOUS WINNERS TNT 1421: Hat Club clubbing tickets: Atish Samlal, Petra Hora, Tim Webb, Helen Mowry, Jamie Thompson 1421 Good Times clubbing

Win a guidebook on page 16

tickets: Jeannie Jackson,Teresa Gorinski.

TNT 1421: Superclub CDs: Kate Mccall, Mark Taylor, John Savile TNT 1422: Laurent Garnier Live Booth Sessions tickets: Daniel Hora, Andrea Erasmus

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LONDON

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You’ve won s Lonely Planet (lonelyplanet.com) guide of your choice. PLUS for another chance to win, log on to tntmagazine.com/ gallery and see if you’ve been circled.

18

MEZZA BAR London Sat, November 27 Photos by: Nicola Bellifantie/TNT Images

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SILLY BUGGERS

20

My boyfriend’s visa has run out, meaning he will have to move home. He has suggested we get married so he can stay. I love him but I’m not sure this is a good idea. What should I do?

Q

A

People say you should only ever marry for love but, as someone who’s pressured quite a few men into getting hitched, I can assure you that is nothing but greeting card bullshit.

I’ve married for expedience several times and for myriad reasons – once to avoid an outstanding warrant, once to secure joint

TOOL OF THE WEEK Relief for truckie Kiwi truck driver Lawrence Jury avoided jail-time after appearing in court charged with smoking a bong while driving his rig. Jury insisted he would never smoke while driving, but admitted he had pulled a couple of cones while waiting for his cargo to be loaded, before offering a novel excuse.

“I only took the bong with me because I’d been constipated for seven days,” he said. “When you haven’t been to the toilet you start worrying ... after two pipes I was quite relieved.”

A

How romantic. You’re ownership of a really like Romeo and Juliet, spacious caravan, which star-crossed lovers kept I later took in the divorce. apart not by the feuding You say you love this guy, Capulets and Montagues but but where will that leave you by heartless, self-interested in five years when you have to conceal this marriage to lure immigration services. Don’t repeat my mistake by allowing another patsy? The more times you get married, the longer the bureaucracy to stand in the way of paper trail – youthful it gets harder passions. and harder When I to forge new worked at identities – so Foot Locker, pull the trigger I was in sparingly, love with otherwise your a colleague, whole scam but the could come Shotgun wedding company tumbling down.

had a policy that forbade co-workers from hooking up.

So I admired from afar; watched as her delicate, porcelain hands measured customers’ in-steps and listened as her inane, singsong small talk lit up that store like fairies’ laughter.

We shared a moment in the store room once. Staring into her eyes, I was sure she wanted me to kiss her. But the next week, she took a job at The Athlete’s Foot and my size 7 siren was gone.

» Got a sex or relationship dilemma? Email dearreuben@ tntmagazine.com

THINGS THE QUEEN SHOULD DO BEFORE SHE DIES

# 407

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RICH LIST DROP FOR ROCKEFELLER KYLIE If you’ve got any spare cash this Christmas, you might want to lend it to Kylie as it looks as though the credit crunch is taking its toll. The singer has this week plunged from second place in the annual Australian BRW Top 50 entertainers rich list to 26th.

She earned a measly AU$4.9m this year – compared to AU$47m in 2009. Poor thing. Perhaps that’s why she was at the

Christmas light switch on at New York’s Rockefeller Centre. Kylie wasn’t the only star who saw a slash in her pay cheque. Russell Crowe also might need to cut back on his lavish lifestyle. The actor has also dropped out of the rich list’s top 10, earning just AU$8.6m compared to AU$25m in 2009. The Aussie creators of BBC’s Walking with Dinosaurs, Global Creatures are in the top spot with AU$140m.

Seunds a but paculiah, Annuh!

Anna Paquin is shunning her family and friends – so that her Kiwi accent doesn’t get any stronger.

The actress told musicrooms.net she won’t be calling New Zealand in the run-up to filming True Blood in case she loses her Louisiana lilt for Stookie Stackhouse.

“It still comes up now and again. It’s especially bad after I’ve been on

Getty Images

AUSTRALIA New Idea: The mag gives us a sneak peak of Oprah Winfrey’s luxurious Sydney accommodation; Keith Urban reveals that he thought Nicole Kidman would leave him when he went to rehab; and prime minister Julia Gillard’s stepdaughter gets a makeover.

Woman’s Day: Joh Griggs talks about her decision to leave her sports reader role.

SOUTH AFRICA

the phone to my mum or my sister,” she laughed.

SAY WHAT?

”Didn’t you know that all my characters are gay?”

Poor Kylie at the Rockefeller Centre

Woman’s Weekly: Newlywed cricketer Chris Cairns and wife Mel are expecting a baby girl; Shortland Street actress Stephanie Tauevihi opens up about her depression and weight issues; and Coro’s Bev Callard marries beau Jon McEwan.

What Johnny Depp said to Disney executives who questioned Captain Jack Sparrow’s sexual inclination.

Heat: SA model Adeline Mocke, actress Shashi Naidoo, and radio DJ Bonang Matheba show off their bikini bods; and swimmer hottie Ryk Neethling is single again.

You: Blue Bulls’ Deon Helberg talks about how he was terrorised by his ex-partner’s mum; and the siblings of murdered Anni Dewani talks about their beloved sister.

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ENTERTAINMENT

CELEBRITY NEWS

GLOSSY GOSSIP FROM HOME

23

ENTERTAINMENT

TNT LIFE TNT Christmas Party

TNT Boxing Day Bash

Experience a traditional English Christmas with TNT at our Chrissy celebrations at the Elk Bar on December 21.

Come and enjoy mulled wine as well as a festive sausage sizzle, served from the BBQ.

Join us for some post-Xmas fun at TNT’s Boxing Day Bash at Bison & Bird in Clapham on December 26. With free entry, festive food deals and drinks specials you’re guaranteed a merry time!

» Elk Bar, Fulham Rd, SW6 5UA » Bison & Bird, Clapham High Fulham Brodway. 5pmmidnight. Tue, Dec 21. See tntmagazine.com/ christmas2010

24

Street, SW4 7UG Clapham North. 6pm- late on Tue, Dec 26. See tntmagazine.com/ boxingday

Shake it like a polaroid picture at the TNT NYE Party

TNT NYE PARTY SPOTLIGHT ON TNT EVENTS 2011 Get ready for another year of TNT fun in 2011. First up is our Australia Week celebrations, followed by a Valentine’s Day get-together, ongoing TEFL and Learn the

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03/09/2010 13:48

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Enter 2011 in style at TNT’s ‘Roaring Twenties’ NYE bash at Gigalum on December 31. Tickets are only £10 and include a glass of champagne on arrival (before 9pm). There’ll also be drink specials and DJs playing throughout the night. Plus the best-dressed party-goer wins a prize from Sail Croatia. » Gigalum, Cavendish Pde, SW4 9DW Clapham South. Fri, Dec 31. See tntmagazine.com/nye

LOOK WHO’S TALKING

The sound-effects genius shot to fame as Jones in the Police Academy films. He can do a great Jimi Hendrix, but his wife tries to dissuade him from using his gift in public INTERVIEW ALISON GRINTER It’s interesting that you’re coming to the Jazz Cafe because you got your start in jazz opening for Count Basie ...

Yes, that’s how I got Police Academy. I was in California at the time and living in my car but it was one of those dream gigs that you end up getting. So I got to do my fusion jazz noises. At the time the producer and director of Police Academy were in the audience. They were jazz fanatics and after they saw me perform they wrote me into the script.

Police Academy made you a star. Was that an interesting time?

At first it was a headscratching thing.

People were like, “What the hell is this guy?”. And being given the title of creator of beatbox is very interesting – I guess I was the first person on film to be doing it.

Is it true that when you were a kid you used to use Rottweiler noises to freak out the kids who were picking on you?

After they’d beat me up a few times they’d go off laughing about it and have a ciggy behind the wall at the school. So I would sneak up on them and they would hear this angry animal coming around the corner … Or I’d do the late bell, that would make them turn up to class on time!

YOU DON’T SAY? What song makes you dance?

Do The Dougie by Doug E. Fresh. It’s a fun song.

Have you ever been mistaken for someone else?

In Perth this guy said to me, “Excuse me Mr Murphy, welcome to Australia” and he did a big laugh, “Hur hur hur hur!”. He thought I was Eddie Murphy!

Name your guilty pleasure...

One thing I’ve had to stop is talking food in the Chinese restaurant - like when the stir fried chicken comes out [breaks into loud chicken noises] I had to stop because the cooks have sharper instruments than i have on the table...

Did these pranks ever backfire?

One thing I did learn in terms of sound is never do the sound of a dog in front of a dog – because he’ll bite you.

Your Jimi Hendrix rendition is amazing – were you in much demand during the 40th anniversary of his death?

hear perfect pitch. I work with bands and there are times when the guitarist is trying to tune his guitar and I can do it in my head. And heavy noises like semitrucks, motorcycles and gears are rough on the vocal chords.

Do you ever play tricks on people?

In terms of the live show, we had a huge upsurge in people comings. The best thing about sound is that there’s no language barrier. They loved it in Japan and the Australians too.

No, my wife wouldn’t allow it. I used to do that stuff all the time but it creates a public hazard. I can’t do the flight attendant call button on airplanes anymore – that’s a crime now.

In your Crocodile Hunter sketch you nail the didgeridoo but your Aussie accent’s a bit rough …

» Michael Winslow, at the Jazz Cafe, NW1 7PG Camden Town (0870 060 3777; jazzcafe.co.uk). Wed, Dec 8. £16.50

In Alice Springs I met some Aboriginal dancers. One said, “Bet you can’t play it, if you can you can have it”.

I put drum noises through it and actually played it – I used to be a trumpet player. He had to give it to me.

What are the hardest noises to make?

Musical stuff cos it has to be on key, but I can

ENTERTAINMENT

Michael Winslow

25

‘OH MY

GOD!’

Tim Minchin likes sticking it to the irrationality of religion. He also enjoys going barefoot and his passing resemblance to Kurt Cobain WORDS ALISON GRINTER

O

f all the Aussie comics we expected to see packing out the O2 Arena one day, Tim Minchin wasn’t among them – Adam Hills or Jim Jeffries maybe, but not the scarecrowhaired, eyeliner-wearing, “piano hack” whose taboo-busting tunes include The Pope Song and Inflatable You. There’s hope that the mainstream isn’t such a bland place after all …

One of your songs is called The Palestine Peace Song which goes: ”We don’t eat pigs, you don’t eat pigs, why not not eat pigs together?” There aren’t many comics who could get away with that.

And it’s also about, lyrically, structuring ideas in a way that people find intriguing or interesting and that song is funny cos it takes such a complicated issue and distills it into such a ridiculously simple proposition. A lot of what I do is also about religion and belief, and this makes the point that Islam and Judaism have the sames myths wrapped up in a different bunch of crap and that it’s ridiculous that they don’t like each other.

You’ve always been obsessed with religion in your comedy. Why is that?

If you’ve been brought up to think your version of god is special it can hamper your ability to think clearly about religion.

I’m pretty obsessed with rationalism.

It’s an intellectual obsession … it’s not just me bashing god. And it’s fun!

Do some people react badly to some of your material?

The Pope Song gets a couple of walkouts.

People are so offended by language [the song repeatedly calls the Pope ‘a motherfucker’] but if people keep their ears open then they’ll hear the point. My song’s saying the Pope’s not special – he needs to be as accountable as everyone else. People have walked out on stuff I do about babies dying – I also do darkly comic material about stuff I fear [Minchin has two kids] – it’s obviously too close to some terrible experience they’ve had. But it’s OK – if you don’t have a few people walking out then you’re probably not doing your job properly.

Do you still go barefoot onstage?

I come from Freemantle in the 90s, everyone was a hippie so I spent most of my days wandering around in barefeet and playing music like a dickhead. Then I decided to roll that dickhead-ness over into my thirties. It’s a bit like imagining the audience naked – you usually take your shoes off at home so it’s kinda like saying ‘you’re in my space now’.

Tim Minchin: offensive, but with a purpose

tntmagazine.com

Do you feel pressure to tone down your material now that you’re more famous?

People come to my shows because of what I do, as opposed to a lot of comedians who

get their audience by being on a regular TV show where they’re not allowed to swear. I got my audience from word-ofmouth and they want to see me debunking irrational ideas. In fact, playing with an 55-piece orchestra on these shows I feel the obligation to make sure I don’t get cleaned-up. An orchestra is seen as a sacred thing to be treated with reverence and respect so I’ve got them yelling out ‘motherfucker!’ in the middle of songs.

Your supposedly ‘anti-Christian’ song White Wine In The Sun, missed out on becoming Christmas number one last year – are you going to re-release it?

The Herald Sun have just written a beat-up story about that. Singer Kate MillerHeidke has just covered it on the Myer Xmas album. They asked my permission and I said ‘yes’. It turns out the money’s going to the Salvation Army who are proselytizing missionaries, so a journalist has interviewed the spokesperson for the Christian Association for Fuckwits and got quotes from them: “We think it’s a sick joke that this heathen song is on the album.” Fuckin’ hilarious! It’s just a song about love for my family and makes grown men cry.

Ever been told you look like Kurt Cobain?

There’s one photo of me I call my ‘Kurt photo’ with my hair over my face, it’s in black and white. Though, to be fair, looking like Kurt Cobain now would be looking like a dead man with no face.

» Tim Minchin and his orchestra performs at the O2, SE10 0DX North Greenwich (0844 856 0202, theo2.co.uk). Tue, Dec 14. £40. DVD Ready For This? out now.

ENTERTAINMENT 27

Nirvana? That’d be straying into religious territory wouldn’t it?

tntmagazine.com

ENTERTAINMENT

CINEMA

28

The Thorn In The Heart

SCREEN TEST: FRENCH FILM

Suzette, Michel & Jean-Yves Gondry

STARRING (as themselves):

CERT: TBC RT: 86 MINS

1 Which French singer does Marion Cotillard portray in biopic La Vie en Rose?

2 Which water sport featured in 1998 blockbuster hit The Big Blue?

3 In what kind of environment does the film A Prophet take place?

4 In which Parisian district does Amélie work in 2001 rom-com Amélie?

5 How many films are there in Luc Besson’s Taxi series?

★★★★★

After the mind-bendingly brilliant Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind and The Science Of Sleep, the arrival of a new Michel Gondry film is usually cause for celebration.

It’s a disappointment, then, that documentary The Thorn In The Heart is so boring.

A deeply personal homage to his aunt Suzette, this will enthral the Gondry household, but it’s difficult to fathom why the director thought anyone else would give a damn.

Moving at a pedestrian pace, Gondry takes Suzette to the places in the French countryside where she worked as a teacher for 30 years. She meets up with former colleagues and pupils who sing her praises and Suzette recalls the difficulties of teaching in buildings

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WIN

Boring: dinnertime with the Gondrys

placed perilously close to roads. Gondry also focuses on his aunt’s strange relationship with her son Jean-Yves, who is left in a state after his father dies. With the director failing to flesh out some of the more interesting aspects of Suzette’s

life – the fact that she taught Algerian refugees or, at times, used vicious ways to control her pupils – The Thorn In The Heart soon becomes a pain in the behind.

GOOD FOR: Those who can sit still. PIERRE DE VILLIERS

LAST WEEK’S ANSWERS 1 Ellen Ripley 2 Kevin Spacey 3 Howard the Duck 4 Jesse Ventura 5 The Man Who Fell to Earth LAST WEEK’S WINNER Philip Lawrance

THE REEL DEAL The story behind Australia’s Snowtown murders will hit the big screen next year.

The film, about how eight bodies were found in barrels of acid in Snowtown, South Australia, in 1999, has a cast largely drawn from the town’s community.

Adelaide Film Festival director Katrina Sedgwick told smh.com.au Snowtown “illuminates a darkness within our society and within humanity, exploring in microcosm what the context was that allowed a number of people to move from being normal humans into being complicit or actually killing their neighbours”.

★★★★★

Witty and compelling

CERT: TBC RT: 111 MINS

Former Bond villain Mathieu Amalric excels behind and in front of the camera in a compelling drama about a TV producer who returns to France from America to manage a troupe of burlesque dancers. The performers and their witty routines are sublime but it is Amalric who steals the show.

GOOD FOR: Dita Von Teese fans. PDV

SOMEWHERE

★★★★★

CERT: 15 RT: 97 MINS

A party-animal movie star (played by Stephen Dorff) is thrown a curve ball when his ex-wife dumps their 11-yearold daughter (Elle Fanning) in his lap in Sofia Coppola’s frustratingly bland return as a director. There are some nice touches and Dorff is in decent form but the film meanders along without much purpose.

GOOD FOR : Those who like PDV slow-burning movies.

Somewhere: a bit slow

Getty Images, picselect

Heath Ledger’s Joker may have one more last laugh left in him.

Christopher Nolan is reportedly considering using previously unseen footage of Ledger in the new Batman movie, The Dark Knight Rises.

Stuff.co.nz reported the idea was to use CGI to provide some continuity between the movies and also to pay tribute to Ledger and his portrayl of the Joker.

If it goes ahead it is likely to be a hit with fans and industry professionals alike, as the late Auusie actor’s performance has gone down in film history as one of the most intense ever seen.

Ledger will only be included with the consent of his family.

ON TOUR

CULTURE FELA! A legend in his lifetime in his native Nigeria and beyond, Fela Anikulapo-Kuti is a name unlikely to be familiar to the National’s usual audience – but then this isn’t a typical NT show.

The pounding rhythms of his Afrobeat music flood the auditorium as his female queens gyrate intensely, provocatively on a set decked out to recreate the Shrine, the Lagos nightclub where, in the late 70s, his fans gathered to smoke spliffs and hear his antigovernment lyrics.

Sahr Ngaujah’s charismatic Fela Kuti persuades the

ENTERTAINMENT

SEE THIS: Theatre

Lively, hypnotic choreography

audience to practise its pelvic thrusts, and Bill T Jones’ hipswivelling choreography is hypnotisingly exuberant.

But the narrative is so disjointed and one-sided that ultimately this musical is more over-extended carnival than informative biography of a provocative political activist and hedonistic polygamist. LOUISE KINGSLEY

29

» National Theatre, SE1 Waterloo (nationaltheatre. org.uk). Until Jan 23. From £10

TNT online For more reviews visit tntmagazine.com/londonlife

WORTH A LOOK The team behind Sinderfella are back with adults-only pantomime Snow White And The Seven Poofs for festive giggles » Leicester Square Theatre, WC2H 7BX

•Enjoy Dickens’ classic novel

Leicester Square (leicestersquaretheatre.com). Until Jan 9. £18.50

in this production of A Christmas Carol » Trafalgar Studios, SW1A 2DY

Charing Cross (trafalgar-studios.co.uk). Until Jan 8. From £18

EXHIBITION OF THE WEEK

NEW BOOK RELEASES

BRIDGET RILEY: PAINTINGS AND RELATED WORK

ROLE MODELS

DEAD OR ALIVE

Gordon Brown

Tom Clancy

(Simon & Schuster Ltd)

(Michael Joseph) DEC 7

DEC 7

The bestselling author of The Hunt For Red October fame is back with new instalment of the Jack Ryan, Jr series which sees the covert agent come up against sadistic terrorist mastermind, the Emir.

One of the founders of the Op Art movement, and renowned for her flowing geometric canvases and hypnotically layered wall paintings, Bridget Riley would seem to have more in common with Tate Modern’s abstract embrace, rather than the National

Gallery. The show includes a collection of influences on her work, which attempt to explain her presence here. It’s worth a look, if only to put the current over-excitement about 3D imaging into a canvas and oil context. MARK RICHARD

» National Gallery, WC2N Charing Cross (nationalgallery .org.uk). Until May 22. Free.

Studio work: Bridget Riley in the Sixties

The former prime minister delves deep into the causes behind the fi scal downward spiral and examines the reactions of world leaders as they took steps to avoid further disaster.

HARVEST TO THE HEAT

TNT images, Bridget Riley

Darryl Estrine and Kelly Kochendorfer

BUST: GREECE, THE EURO AND THE DEBT CRISIS Matthew Lynn (John Wiley & Sons) )

(Taunton) DEC 7

DEC 10

This bang on-trend book celebrates the collaboration between farmer and chef, and the journey from land to table with 100 easy to cook recipes ’n’ all.

Bloomberg columnist Matthew Lynn explores Greece’s rise and fall from grace and the global repercussions of its financial disaster.

MORE EXHIBITIONS Celebrate all things outdoors at

the Wildlife Photographer Of The Year » Natural History Museum, SW7 5BD South Kensington (nhm.ac.uk). Until March 11. From £4.50

• Imperial

Chinese Robes From The Forbidden City looks at Qing Dynasty fashions

» V&A, SW7 2RL

South Kensington (vam.ac.uk). Until March 6. From £3

tntmagazine.com

MUSIC LISTINGS Warpaint

MUSIC & CLUBS

MONDAY 6

Glenn Tilbrook join forces once again to play witty pop. IndigO2, Peninsula Sq,

Autolux Experimental rock from the Californian three-piece.

SE10 0DX (0871 220 0260). £35.

Relentless Garage, Highbury Corner, N5 1RD (0870 060 3777/ cc 0844 847 1678). £12.

Angus & Julia Stone, Moddi

Interpol The sartorial New Yorkers play indie-rock. O2 Academy Brixton, Stockwell Rd, SW9 9SL (0844 477 2000). £22.50.

Tcha Limberger’s Kalotaszeg Trio The violinist and singer leads his group in playing Romanian Gypsy music.

soul from the Californian singer-songwriter. IndigO2, Peninsula Sq, SE10 0DX (0871 220 0260). £28.50-£40.

Neurosis The Californian band plays doom metal.

Koko, Camden High St, NW1 7JE (0870 432 5527). £16.50.

Xavier Rudd, Ben Howard Folk-rock from the Australian singer-songwriter. O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, Shepherd’s Bush Green, W12 8TT (0905 020 3999/ cc 0844 477 2000). £18.50.

Shepherd’s Bush Empire, W11 8QE Shepherd’s Bush. (08444 77 2000). Mon, Feb 21. £14 The Los Angeles all-gal outfit have critics and tastemakers foaming at the mouths for their nouveau take on art-rock. They do a lovely, floaty cover of David Bowie’s Ashes To Ashes too.

Teenage Fanclub The

Richard Thompson, Philip Pickett & Musicians Of The Globe Folk-rock from

Boy & Bear Australian folk five-

Ballroom, Camden High St, NW1 8QP (020 7485 9006). £17.50.

the veteran singer-songwriter.

Rd, NW6 7JR (020 7372 7123). £5 & £8.

Cadogan Hall, Sloane Terrace, SW1X 9DQ (020 7730 4500). £10-£35.

Dreadzone Experimental

LA-based musician performs his comedic rock-tinted songs. HMV Forum, Highgate

piece. The Luminaire, Kilburn High

electro, dance and reggae from the London-based band. The Scala, Pentonville Rd, N1 9NL (020 7833 2022/ cc 0870 060 0100). £16.50.

Rd, NW5 1JY (020 7344 0044). £25.

Glasgow-based four-piece plays indie-pop. The Electric

THURSDAY 9 Coope, Boyes & Simpson, Fi Fraser, Jo Freya Traditional a capella folk from the trio. Cecil Sharp House, Regents Park Rd, NW1 7AY (020 7485 2206). £17, adv £14.

Faith Evans, SWV American

TUESDAY 7

hip-hop and R‘n’B singersongwriter. IndigO2, Peninsula Sq, SE10 0DX (0871 220 0260). £25-£50.

The Courteeners The Manchester-based band plays hook-laden indie-rock.

HMV Forum, Highgate Rd, NW5 1JY (020 7344 0044). £18.50.

Dirty Projectors, Male Bonding Avantgarde

The Frames The Dublinbased five-piece plays indie-rock. O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, Shepherd’s Bush Green, W12 8TT (0905 020 3999/ cc 0844 477 2000). £15.

electronica from the Brooklynbased outfit performing material from its album Bitte Orca. Koko, Camden High St,

Jenny And Johnny Melodic alt pop from the Los Angeles-based outfit, featuring Rilo Kiley member Jenny Lewis. Bush Hall, Uxbridge

NW1 7JE (0870 432 5527). £17.50.

Rd, W12 7LJ (020 8222 6955). £16.50.

Fool’s Gold The Californian combo play indie-rock with African and other world influences. Cargo, Rivington St, EC2A 3AY (020 7739 3440). £9.50.

An Horse, Sparrow And The Workshop, Georgia Ruth Williams Alt rock from the Australian duo. The Borderline, Orange Yard, Manette St, W1D 4JB (0870 060 3777/ cc 0871 231 0842). £8.50.

Willie Nile, Alejandro Escovedo, Joe D’Urso Rock and Americana from the New York-based singer-songwriter.

Half Moon, Putney, Lower Richmond Rd, SW15 1EU (020 8780 9383). £25.

pioneers return to promote their album Pandemonium.

HMV Apollo, Queen Caroline St, W6 9QH (0844 844 4748). £50.

from the flamboyant crooner.

Wembley Arena, Arena Sq, HA9 0DH (0870 060 0870). £48 & £58.

W1J 9HN (020 7734 8142/ cc 0845 345 6053). £20-£55.

SE10 0DX (0871 220 0260). £30.

tntmagazine.com

Fat 45, Sheelanagig Swing and jump-jive from the 11-piece combo. Town Hall, Stoke Newington Church St, N16 0JR (020 8356 5505). £15, adv £12.

9AG (0844 264 0321). £9.50-£29.50.

The Coolness, Joe Winston, Reginald D Hunter Psychedelic electro-rock from the four-piece.

Bush Hall, Uxbridge Rd, W12 7LJ (020 8222 6955). £100 inc meal.

Paloma Faith And The Guy Barker Orchestra The London-based soul songstress performs with the 42-piece orchestra. Barbican Centre,

IQ The 1980s band plays progressive rock. O2 Academy Islington, N1 Centre, Parkfield St, N1 0PS (0844 477 2000). £16.50.

The Orb Electronica duo from London. The Scala, Pentonville Rd, N1 9NL (020 7833 2022/ cc 0870 060 0100). £16.

The Quireboys Classic rock from the four-piece’s album Homewreckers & Heartbreakers.

HMV Forum, Highgate Rd, NW5 1JY (020 7344 0044). £16.50.

Funktonite Explosive soul and funk octet. Dover St Restaurant And Bar, Dover St, W1S 4LQ (020 7629 9813). £15, free to diners before 10pm.

The Human League The synth-wielding trio from Sheffield plays electro-pop.

Southbank Centre, Belvedere Rd, SE1 8XX (0844 847 9910/ cc 0871 663 2500). £20-£30.

It’s A Swing Thing Christmas Ball 1940s and 1950s style

Status Quo Classic rock from the veteran band celebrating more than 40 years of hits.

Wembley Arena, Arena Sq, HA9 0DH (0870 060 0870). £34.50.

Jun Tabor Contemporary folk from the veteran singer.

Kings Place, York Way, N1 9AG (0844 264 0321). £9.50-£29.50.

Gordon Webber’s Rd Runners The nine-piece big

music and dance, including jive,

band plays soul and Motown.

swing and R‘n’B. Ye Olde Rose And Crown Theatre Pub, Hoe St, E17 4SA (020 8509 3880). £12, adv £8.

Dover St Restaurant And Bar, Dover St, W1S 4LQ (020 7629 9813). £15, free to diners before 10pm.

Academy Brixton, Stockwell Rd, SW9 9SL (0844 477 2000). £27.50.

Jackie Leven, Ralph McTell

Darren Hanlon Indie-pop

Alt rock from the Fife-born singersongwriter. Union Chapel, Compton

Paul Young The soulful pop singer performs with a 16-piece band. Park

with a folky twist from the Australian singer-songwriter.

Terrace, N1 2UN (020 7226 1686). £18, adv £15, concs £12.50.

The Horatia, Holloway Rd, N7 8JE (0207 6096220). £9, adv £8.

James The veteran indie four-

Men They Couldn’t Hang The London-based five-piece plays folk-rock. 100 Club, Oxford St, W1D

piece from Manchester promotes its mini album The Night Before.

1LL (020 7636 0933). £18, adv £16.50.

HMV Apollo, Queen Caroline St, W6 9QH (0844 844 4748). £32.50-£37.50.

Michael Roach The

JLS The pop and R‘n’B

At The King’s Head, Crouch End Hill, N8 8AA (020 8340 1028). £10.

four-piece plays songs from its self-titled album. O2

Plaza Westminster Bridge London, Westminster Bridge Rd, SE1 7UT (0844 415 6790). £95 inc meal.

SUNDAY 12 Bullet For My Valentine

Washington-born guitarist plays East Coast blues. Downstairs

The metalcore four-piece promotes its album, Fever.

Wembley Arena, Arena Sq, HA9 0DH (0870 060 0870). £20 & £22.50.

Pete Rock & CL Smooth, Jehst The two hip-hop stalwarts

Arena, Peninsula Sq, SE10 0DX (0871 220 0260). £25-£33.31.

The Selecter Ska and pop from the veteran re-formed Londonbased band. The Scala, Pentonville

The New Pornographers

Rd, N1 9NL (020 7833 2022/ cc 0870 060 0100). £17.

NW5 1JY (020 7344 0044). £18.50.

Alejandro Toledo & The Magic Tombolinos Balkan, Oriental and

The Canadian collective plays indie-rock. O2 Shepherd’s

reunite for their distinctive brand of rap. HMV Forum, Highgate Rd,

Rotersand, Straftanz, RBN,

Bush Empire, Shepherd’s Bush Green, W12 8TT (0905 020 3999/ cc 0844 477 2000). £16.50.

Gypsy sax-led sextet from London.

AlterRed The outfit from Germany plays twisted industrial and electronica. O2 Academy

folk singer-songwriter blends traditional songs with her selfpenned tunes. Southbank Centre,

Alice Russell Brighton-based

The Green Note Cafe, Parkway, NW1 7AN (020 7485 9899). £12.

Islington, N1 Centre, Parkfield St, N1 0PS (0844 477 2000). £13.

Belvedere Rd, SE1 8XX (0844 847 9910/ cc 0871 663 2500). £25, concs £12.50.

HMV Forum, Highgate Rd, NW5 1JY (020 7344 0044). £19.

Trumans Water Alt and noise-rock from the Portlandbased combo. The Half Moon,

Frank Turner The folk-punk

Simply Red The inimitable Mick Hucknall and his soulful band perform their hits for the final time. O2 Arena, Peninsula Sq,

Kellie Santin Contemporary jazz from the Australian alto saxophonist. The Spice

Half Moon Ln, Herne Hill, SE24 9HU (020 7274 2733). £10, adv £8.

O2 Academy Brixton, Stockwell Rd, SW9 9SL (0844 477 2000). £16.

Of Life, Moor St, W1D 5NA (020 7739 3025). £10, NUS £8.

Paul Weller The singersongwriter and former frontman of The Jam and The Style Council plays his idiosyncratic hits, plus songs from his album Wake Up The Nation. Wembley Arena, Arena

soul and power-pop singer.

SE10 0DX (0871 220 0260). £40 & £50.

Suede Brett Anderson’s Britpop pioneers play their rock hits. O2 Arena, Peninsula Sq,

Troxy, Commercial Rd, E1 0HX (020 7748 2728). £25.50 & £27.

The indie band from Liverpool plays its seminal albums, Heaven Up Here and Crocodiles. O2

The Puppini Sisters The vocal trio sings fortiesinfluenced swing-tinted pop. Pigalle, Piccadilly,

Bonobo, Jono McLeery

Echo And The Bunnymen

Pet Shop Boys The electro-pop

Kate Rusby The award-winning Meat Loaf Operatic rock

Bonobo aka Simon Green plays hip-hop, funk, soul, psyche rock and drum ‘n’ bass.

Silk St, EC2Y 8DS (0845 120 7500/ cc 020 7638 8891). £20-£30.

WEDNESDAY 8

Weird Al Yankovic The

Rd, SE1 8XX (0844 847 9910/ cc 0871 663 2500). £15-£17.50.

and contemporary folk from the concertina maestro and composer. Kings Place, York Way, N1

TNT’S TOP BOOKING WARPAINT

Black Rebel Motorcycle Club, The Duke Spirit The biker-booted trio plays rock riffs and blues ballads from its album Beat The Devil’s Tattoo. O2 Academy Brixton, Stockwell Rd, SW9 9SL (0844 477 2000). £20.

Alistair Anderson, Emily Ball, Sophy Ball Traditional

Brian McKnight R‘n’B and

SATURDAY 11

The Australian brother-sister duo plays dreamy folk-rock songs from its sophomore album, Down The Way. Southbank Centre, Belvedere

FRIDAY 10

Le QuecumBar, Battersea High St, SW11 3HX (020 7787 2227). £15.

30

Squeeze, The Lightning Seeds Chris Difford and

Submit your free listing at least three weeks prior to the publication by emailing gigs@pressassociation.com.

Sq, HA9 0DH (0870 060 0870). £38.50.

performer plays from his album Poetry Of The Deed.

TNT online For full listings info go to tntmagazine. com/whats_on

MUSIC

GIG GUIDE MUSIC & CLUBS

Alison Grinter PICKS OUT THIS WEEK’S BEST LIVE MUSIC

GIG OF THE WEEK INTERPOL Now that there’s a Carlos D-shaped hole in Interpol, you’ve got to wonder how the other three will fare without their charismatic bassist to create a visual focal point for the band point, never mind his dramatic way with a bassline.

In any case, Carlos contributed to the New York act’s most recent LP, Interpol, so this week he’ll be onstage in spirit, at least. The album hasn’t captured the dramatic, Joy Divisionish melancholic glory of their debut Turn On The Bright Lights, but it’s good to have them back – Carlos or no Carlos.

31

» Brixton Academy, 211 Stockwell Road, SW9 9SL (0844 477 2000)

Brixton. Dec 6-8. £25 Interpol: then there were three

SUEDE

JLS

Suede’s reunion earlier this year didn’t generate the same level of hysteria that accompanied the recent news that fellow Brit-poppers Pulp were reforming. Still, it’s worth remembering how groundbreaking their lush, darkly sensual guitar-rock, as heard on classic LPs like Dog Man Star, sounded in the 90s. Worth revisiting.

Given how boy bands are beloved in this country, it’s a wonder one hasn’t taken home the X Factor crown. But 2008 runners-up JLS might as well have won, considering how their career has turned out. They’ve won a swag of industry awards, have legions of screaming fans and are here to plug second LP Outta This World.

» The O2, Peninsular Sq, SE10 0DX

» The O2, Peninsular Sq, SE10 0DX

North Greenwich

(0844 856 0202). Tue, Dec 7. £30

NEW BAND ALERT

North Greenwich (0844 856 0202, theo2.co.uk). Dec 9-10. £25-£32

FESTIVAL WATCH Tickets now on sale Benicassim Discounted tickets are now on sale. Line-up TBC. Benicassim, Spain (fiberfib.com). Jul 14-17.

Four-day tickets £125

Horses for courses

An Horse THE BUZZ SO FAR Establishing their indie cred from the outset,

Kate Cooper and Damon Cox formed An Horse at an independent record shop in Brisbane where they both worked.

The store actually closed down a few months after they started gigging but the alternative-pop duo are still going strong with a support slot for Death Cab For Cutie and a performance of their latest single, Camp Out, on the Late Show With David Letterman under their belts.

THE PLUG At Borderline, Manette St, W1D 4JB (0844 847 2465).

Tuesday, Mar 3 Tottenham Court Road. Tues, Dec 7. £8.50

Bestival Tickets The Cure, Brian Wilson, Magnetic Man, Primal Scream Robyn DJ Shadow confirmed.

Robin Hill Country Park, Isle of Wight (bestival.net). Sep 8-11.

W/e tickets £160 Isle Of Wight Festival Kings of Leon, Kasabian, Pulp, Foo Fighters and The British Pink Floyd Show confirmed.

Seaclose Park, Newport, (isleofwightfestival.com).

Jun 10-12. W/e tickets £175 Primavera Sound Pulp confirmed.

Parc del Forum, Barcelona

(primaverasound.com).

May 27-29. W/e tickets £87 Reading/Leeds festivals Early Bird tickets on sale now.

Reading/Leeds (seetickets.com).

Aug 26-28. W/e ticket £180 Rock am Ring Kings of Leon, Beatsteaks, Volbeat, In Flames confirmed.

Nurburg and Nuremburg, Germany (ringrocker.com).

Jun 3-5. W/e tickets £130.

Rockness The Chemical Brothers and Kasabian confirmed.

Dores, near Inverness (rockness.co.uk). Jun 10-12.

W/e tickets £149.

Womad Early bird tickets on sale now.

Charlton Park, Wiltshire, (womad.org). Jul 29-31.

W/e tickets £120

tntmagazine.com

MUSIC

MUSIC & CLUBS

ALBUM OF THE WEEK

32

FAST FORWARD The Australian Pink Floyd Show Hammersmith Apollo, (0844 844 4748) Mar 20 £29.50 Bon Jovi Hard Rock Calling, Hyde Park, Jun 25 (hardrockcalling.co.uk) £66 The Cult Hammersmith Apollo, Jan 21 (0844 277 4321). £33

VARIOUS ARTISTS Kitsune Maison Vol.10: the Fireworks Issue (Kitsune)

★★★★★

The hip Franco-Japanese record label is celebrating ten years of breaking some of indie pop’s freshest sounds with two discs stuffed with – you guessed it! – some of indie pop’s freshest sounds.

Well, that’s the theory. The reality is that a bit of filler is unavoidable. Still there’s plenty to get excited about

Wot entrance? Two Door Cinema Club

including Guard’s ramshackle garage on Don’t Wake The Dead, the Italo-disco remix of Two Door Cinema Club’s What You Know, Aussie act Strange Talk’s scissoring electro track Climbing Walls and Brit DJs, Punks Jump Up’s warped

dance tune Blockhead.

Elsewhere Alexis Taylor of Hot Chip’s vocals turn up on Justus Kohncke’s disco driven Sorry and Black Strobe club fave Me And Madonna gets a retread. Good fun all round.

ALISON GRINTER

ALEXANDRA BURKE

MUMFORD & SONS

DEADMAU5

Overcome (Syco Music) Is there no end to these X-Factor cash ins? Ms Burke releases a deluxe version of her 2009 debut.

Sigh No More (Island) The folk middle of the roaders’ debut is beefed up with a live CD and DVD of their on-the-road antics.

4x4=12 (Virgin) Hot on the heels on 2009’s For Lack Of A Better Nam comes Canuck Joel Zimmerman’s latest.

ALSO OUT

MUSIC NEWS London’s The Forum on March 6 (See Fast Forward, right, for booking details).

Cut Copy to play London

Melbourne trio Cut Copy have released the first single off their upcoming new album Zonoscope and have announced a European tour.

The tribal-inspired song Take Me Over can be heard at soundcloud.com/ modularpeople/take-meover-radio-edit. The band’s tour will see them playing at

CHARTS

AC/DC drummer Phil Rudd believes the authorities who convicted him for cannabis possession last week had it in for him.

“Give me a fair go,” he told SunLive.co.nz.

Rudd was convicted in Tauranga District Court for possession of 27 grams of hash which was found on his boat.

“They (the police) have been trying to catch me on the road for a while too.”

Despite missing out at the Aria Awards last month, Perth psych-fuzz rockers Tame Impala beat Aria winners Megan Washington, Angus & Julia Stone and Sia to win Triple J’s much hallowed Album Of The Year Award.

Their winning debut album Innerspeaker has been a huge hit with critics and fans.

Tame Impala: in clover

AUSTRALIA

NEW ZEALAND

SOUTH AFRICA

UK

No 1 single We R Who We R, Ke$ha No 1 album Greatest Hits...So Far, Pink

No 1 single Firework, Katy Perry No 1 album The Gift Susan Boyle

No 1 single Only Girl In The World, Rihanna No 1 album Now That’s What I Call Music 56, Various Artists

No 1 single Heroes, The X Factor Finalists 2010 No 1 album Progress, Take That

tntmagazine.com

Eliza Doolittle Shepherd’s Bush Empire, Apr 9 (0844 477 2000). £15 Cut Copy Forum, Mar 6 (0844 844 0444). £16.50 Elbow The O2, Mar 28 (0844 856 0202). £31 Tommy Emmanuel The Forum, Apr 29 (0844 477 2000). £25 Europe Shepherd’s Bush Empire (0844 477 2000). Feb 19. £18 Ben Folds Hammersmith Apollo, Feb 20 (0844 844 4748). £35 Grinspoon The Garage, Feb 25 (0844 847 1678). £12.50 Ke$ha Shepherd’s Bush Empire, Dec 14 (0844 477 2000). £24.50 Kylie The O2, Apr 7-9, 11-12 (0115 993 4166). £65-£85 Pulp Wireless Festival, Hyde Park, July 3. (0871 230 1094). £50 Pet Shop Boys Hammersmith Apollo Dec 8. (0844 844 4748). £50 Katy Perry Hammersmith Apollo, Mar 17-19 (0844 844 4748). £25 Pnau XOYO, Dec 13 (020 7490 1198). £12.50 Robyn Roundhouse, Mar 3 (0870 264 3333). £18.50 Rumer Shepherd’s Bush Empire, Dec 17 (08444 77 2000) £17.50.

CLUB LISTINGS TNT’S TOP BOOKING

MONDAY 6

MUSIC & CLUBS

Afro-Cuban Lounge

34

African-Cuban salsa, timba and Latin jazz, plus salsa dance classes. Buffalo Bar,

THE BLITZ PARTY The Arches, Shoreditch Studios, 19 New Inn Yard, EC2A 3EY Old Street (theblitzparty. com). Dec 31, £40 Head back to the 40s this NYE and bunker down as The Arches gets transformed into an East End air shelter complete with Djs. Dress code is 40s glam and allied uniform.

Upper St, N1 1RU (020 7359 6191).

7.30pm-9am. £4, inc lessons £7.

Hard Core Salsa DJ Mario plays mambo and salsa, plus dance lessons. Salsa!, Charing Cross Rd, WC2H 0JG (020 7379 3277). 7pm-late. £4, Free before 9pm

I Love Mondays DJ Victor spins commercial dance, disco, pop, garage, R‘n’B and funky house. Moonlighting, Greek St, W1D 4DR (020 7287 372).

10pm-3.30am. £5, NUS £1.

Jaded Rio Padice plays techno and house. Cable, Bermondsey St, SE1 2EG (020 7403 7730).

5am-1pm. £12, £8 guestlist.

Mad Monday’s Resident DJs play chart and party classics. Verve, Upper St. Martin’s Ln, WC2H 9NY (020 7395 1200).

9pm-3am. £3-£7, guestlist free before 11pm, free before 10pm.

Rehab DJs Haley, Dan and The Demonettes play indie, pop and electro. The Roxy, Rathbone Place, W1T 1HJ (020 7255 1098). 10pm-3am. £5, NUS/w/flyer £3, £1 before 10.30pm.

TUESDAY 7 Festa Fiesta Latin and samba from the resident DJs, plus salsa classes before 10pm. Fiesta Havana, Fulham Rd, SW6 5NH (020 7381 5005). 7pm-2am. £6.

Lost In London Party on the ground floor, electrohouse in the basement and R‘n’B in the VIP room. Zoo

Diffrent Strokes DJs Phat Cat, Zay London, Lonyo and MOBO Award winner and Kiss FM DJ Manny Norte play neo soul, 1980s pop, US house, funk and R‘n’B. Cherryjam,

Glitz & Glamour DJ Mark Bambach plays house, R‘n’B and dance. The Shadow Lounge,

Porchester Rd, W2 6ET (020 7727 9950).

9pm-2am. £10, £5 before 11pm.

Mischief Resident DJs spin house, R‘n’B and chart hits.

Groove Sanctuary

On Anon, London Pavillion, Piccadilly, W1V 9LA (020 7287 8008).

8pm-3am. £5, free before 9pm.

African-Latin, electronica, funk, disco and deep house from DJ Jimbo, Joey Vieira and guests. Madame Jo Jo’s, Brewer St, W1F 0SE (020 7734 3040).

9.30pm-3am. £5, free before 11pm.

Brewer St, W1F 0RF (020 7287 7988).

10pm-3am. £5, free before 11pm.

Roller Disco Funk and disco for a wheeled audience.

Renaissance Rooms, Arches, Miles St, SW8 1RZ (0844 736 5375).

8pm-midnight. £10, NUS £5.

WC2H 7AQ (020 7839 4188).

10pm-3am. £10, £7 before 10pm, guestlist free before 10pm.

Smash Techno Techno and

Sterbinszky The Hungarian

Your Mum’s House Scally

DJ spins house and electro.

Dandan and Jamie D Winter spin electro and fidget house. Punk,

Dingwalls, Camden Lock, Chalk Farm Rd, NW1 8AB (020 7428 0010/ cc 020 7428 5929). 8.30pm-late. £17.

Soho St, W1D 3DN (020 7734 4004).

9pm-3am. £5, £3 before 11pm.

tntmagazine.com

(formerly SEOne), St Thomas St, SE1 3QX (020 7407 1617). 11pm-7am. £16.50.

Lost And Found Keb Darge and Andy Smith play blues, rock, funk and Northern Soul. Madame Jo Jo’s, Brewer St, W1F 0SE (020 7734 3040). 10pm-3am. £8.

Phonica Records Anthea and residents play deep house, electro and funk. The Hoxton Pony, Curtain Rd, EC2A 3AH (020 7613 2844). 8pm-4am. £10, guestlist £7, free before 9pm.

Ride Electronica and indie DJs sets from The Enemy and Filthy Few at this fetish-themed night. Proud Camden, The Horse Hospital, Chalk Farm Rd, NW1 8AH (020 7482 3867). 7.30pm-4am. £10.

Shake Disco and pop from DJ John Osbourne and Paul C in the main room, while DJ Milo plays party anthems in room two.

The Electric Ballroom, Camden High St, NW1 8QP (020 7485 9006). 10pm3am. £10, NUS/mems £8.

Tutti Frutti House Prophets, Rico

Wig Out Tommy Turntables, Lady Lloyd and Prince Nelly play indie, rock, R‘n’B and Motown.

& Music Project, City Rd, EC1Y 2BJ (020 7253 2443). 10pm-4am. £15.

soul. Salvador And Amanda, Great Newport St, WC2H 7JA (020 7240 1551). 9pm-3am. £10, guestlist £5, free before 9pm.

Boom Boom Club Rock ‘n’ roll

SATURDAY 11 All Friends Uner, Alex Arnout,

The Den & Centro, West Central St, WC1A 1JJ (020 7240 1083).

10pm-2.30am. £10.

SUNDAY 12

cabaret from host Dusty Limits, and burlesque entertainment from Miss Vicky Butterfly. The

Dance Rocks House,

Bathhouse, Bishopsgate Churchyard, EC2M 3TJ (020 7920 9207). 7.30pmlate. £9, adv £7, £28.50-£33 inc meal.

Watershed, The Broadway, SW19 1SD (020 8540 0080).

8pm-late. £8, £5 before midnight.

Club Remix Eddy Temple Morris

Frolic DJ StevieF spins party,

Ian Jackson supply pop, mod,

Horse Meat Disco Residents

and Bryn 457 play indie, electro, pop and rock, plus Ghostcat and Ice Black Birds perform live. Proud

retro pop and cheese. Crazy

punk, soul and new wave. The Alley Cat, Denmark St, WC2H 8LP (020 7836 1451). 10pm-3am. £6-£8.

Jim Stanton, Luke Howard, James Hillard and Severino spin disco and house. Eagle,

Carpet Burn Jonny Woo,

Kennington Ln, SE11 5QY (020 7793 0903). 8pm-3am. £6.

R‘n’B, chart, indie and 1980s and 1990s hits. The

Neverdogs, Zaki, Alexis Raphael, Cozzy D, Nils Hess and JB play deep house and techno. Egg, York Way, N7 9AX (020 7609 8364).

10pm-11am. £15, adv £12.

Booster DJ Ferno, Dan K and Miss Crazy D, Jason Prince and James St James spin deep house and pop.

Area, Albert Embankment, SE1 7HD (020 7091 0080). 7pm-midnight. £5.

Blow Up Paul Tunkin and

Camden, The Horse Hospital, Chalk Farm Rd, NW1 8AH (020 7482 3867).

7.30pm-2am. £8, £5 before 11pm.

Larry’s, King’s Rd, SW10 0TZ (020 7376 5555). 10pm-3am. £10, guestlist £5 before midnight, guestlist free before 11pm.

Get Yourself Connected Fiesta Latino Latin and samba from the resident DJs, plus salsa classes before 10pm. Fiesta Havana, Fulham Rd, SW6 5NH (020 7381 5005). 7pm-2am. £7.

Nick Tcherniak spins house and electro. The Langley, Langley St, WC2H 9JA (020 7836 5005). 8pm-3am. £10, £5 before 9pm, free before 8pm.

Cheapskates Old school Moonlighting, Greek St, W1D 4DR (020 7287 372). 9pm3.30am. £6, NUS £5, w/flyer £4.

Lost Jeff Mills, Steve Bicknell, Benji B and Tomoki Tamura supply future Detroit techno and minimal house. Debut London

Gadi Mizrahi, Ali Tillett, Rob Summerhayes, Simon Rigg and Vangelis play disco, dub, electro and house. The City Arts

Calentito Pop, R‘n’B, and

hip-hop, electro and disco courtesy of DJ Downfall.

Shadow Lounge, Brewer St, W1F 0RF (020 7287 7988).

10pm-3am. £10, free before 11pm.

1JR (0845 371 4489). 10pm-5am. £20, adv £15.

dubstep and retro from guest DJ Noize Suppressor. The Den

Rd, SW6 5NH (020 7381 5005).

7pm-2am. £7, mems £5.

Inferno Andrew Elmore spins funk, house and dance. The

Warm Nicolas Jaar,

Back To The Future Electro,

Agita Brasil Latin and samba from the resident DJs, plus dance classes before 10pm. Fiesta Havana, Fulham

Therapy Electro-pop and dance from DJs Miswhite, Minx and Paul Heron. The

0TZ (020 7376 5555). 10pm-3am. £10, guestlist £5 before 11pm.

Bedrock DJs Little Chris and George spin indie and pop.

Hill Arts Club, Notting Hill Gate, W11 3JQ (020 7460 4459). 7pm-2am. £5.

& Centro, West Central St, WC1A 1JJ (020 7240 1083). 10pm-3am. £8, £6 before midnight, NUS £5.

414, Coldharbour Ln, SW9 8LF (020 7924 9322). 10pm-6am. £10.

Gorgesusx DJs Howie and Perry play dance and R‘n’B. Crazy Larry’s, King’s Rd, SW10

Shadow Lounge, Brewer St, W1F 0RF (020 7287 7988).

10pm-3am. £10, free before 11pm.

FRIDAY 10 The Borderline, Orange Yard, Manette St, W1D 4JB (0870 060 3777/ cc 0871 231 0842). 11pm-4am. £7, w/flyer £5 before midnight.

THURSDAY 9

acid techno from Acid Steve, Birinight and DJ Roo. Club

play funk, soul and disco.

The Clapham Grand, St John’s Hill, SW11 1TT (020 7223 6523). 10pm3am. £10, £5 before 11pm.

e Liso, Rob Rider, Tarqi A, Nick Morris and Graham Everett spin house and soul, plus Maxine Hardcastle performs live. Pacha, Terminus Place, SW1V

(020 7247 4121). 11pm-4am. £3-£6.

WEDNESDAY 8

Mode PR DJs VG, Shock, Bennie

Rd, EC2A 3QE (020 7739 6471).

9pm-1am. £7, £5 before 10.30pm.

Arias and DJs from Entre Dos Tierras play electro, Latin and Brazilian beats, plus Octavio Sune, Apex and Segunda Geracao perform live. Notting

Brewer St, W1F 0SE (020 7734 3040).

10.30pm-3am. £6, adv £5.

Court, SE17 1LB (020 7703 4760).

9pm-6am, also Sat. £35.

5PG (020 7831 9399). 10pm-3am. £15, guestlist £10 before 11.30pm.

Movimientos Cal Jader,

Marcus and Olly play indie, punk, techno and electro. Madame Jo Jo’s,

A two-day electro, house and techno festival, featuring acts including L-F, Arabian Prince, The Hacker, The Hasbeens, TLR and Rude66. Corsica Studios, Farrell

dance and cheese with resident DJs. Zoo Bar, Bear St,

courtesy of Big John and Biggy C. Hidden, Tinworth St, SE11 5EQ

White Heat DJs Matty,

Magic Waves Festival

G, Supa Mann and Xavier Miller play R‘n’B, hip-hop and funky house. Tamarai, Drury Ln, WC2B

Pearson Sound, Rockwell, Tasha, LX One and Toast supply house, dubstep, drum ‘n’ bass and techno. Plastic People, Curtain

Work! Old school funk and pop

Minster Court, EC3R 7AA (020 7482 3867). 8pm-late. £10.

Cross Rd, WC2H 0JG (020 7379 3277).

7pm-2am. £10, £8 before 11pm, £4 before 9pm, £2 before 8pm.

Temptation Pop, R‘n’B,

Neighbourhood Icicle, Youngsta,

Bar, WC2H 7AQ (020 7839 4188).

7.30pm-3am. £7, guestlist/NUS £5.

Voix De Ville Resident DJs spin retro and underground vintage sounds, plus live swing and blues and burlesque and cabaret entertainment. Proud Cabaret,

Latin Fever Latin tracks from resident DJ Jorge. Salsa!, Charing

Glamorous The residents

Submit your free listing at least three weeks prior to the publication by emailing clubs@pressassociation.com.

Ma Butcher, Princess Julia and John Sizzle play pop, dance, house and Italo disco.

Roller Motion The residents play

Eagle, Kennington Ln, SE11 5QY (020 7793 0903). 9pm-4am. £6, NUS £4, £3 before 10.30pm.

Renaissance Rooms, Arches, Miles St, SW8 1RZ (0844 736 5375). 7pmmidnight. £11.50.

Fabric Craig Richards, Radio Slave, Guy Gerber, Frequency 7, Shackleton, Brett Johnson and Terry Francis play house, techno and electro. Fabric, Charterhouse

WetYourSelf Enzo Tedeschi,

St, EC1M 6HJ (020 7336 8898).

11pm-8am. £18 & £20, NUS £10.

St, EC1M 6HJ (020 7336 8898).

11pm-6am. £8, NUS £5.

R‘n’B, hip-hop, soul and funk.

Mark Chambers, Cormac, Peter Pixzel and Jacob Husley play house, electro and techno. Fabric, Charterhouse

CLUBBING

CLUB GUIDE MUSIC & CLUBS

Natasha Vuckovic PICKS OUT THIS WEEK’S BEST CLUB NIGHTS

CLUB OF THE WEEK BUZZIN’ FLY WINTER PARTY Ben Watt is probably best known as one half of the enigmatic duo Everything But The Girl, but he’s carved out a fine career as DJ, producer and label boss and the popularity of his Buzzin’ Fly parties is a testament to the deep house genius’ skills in the booth. Watt usually invites one other DJ to showcase their skills at Buzzin’ Fly, but this week he’s invited a whole other label with Hamburg’s Dial Records stepping up to the plate.

35

» Cable, SE1 3JW

London Bridge (020 7403 7730, cable-london.com). Sat, Dec 11, 10pm-6am. £10 adv, £13 Ben Watt: no flies on him beats/breaks

funk/soul

drum ’n’ bass

electro

hip-hop

KINKY MALINKI XMAS

MAGIC WAVES FESTIVAL

A night of pure, unadulterated house music with a phenomenal line-up spread over four rooms at Ministry.

Chris Lake and Dutchman Funkerman, AKA Ardie van Beek, lead the charge. The Loft, where it’s strictly vinylonly, will play nothing but house classics.

Have a very kinky Xmas.

It may not be summer and it may not be in a field but this little gem of a festival will warm your winter cockles. A weekend-long riot of Italodisco, electro, techno, new beat and more, this is a bonanza of sonic brilliance featuring Arabian Prince, The Hacker and The Hasbeens. Tents optional.

» Ministry of Sound, 103 Gaunt » Corsica Studios, SE17 1LB St, SE1 6DP Elephant & Castle (0870 060 0010, ministryofsound.com). Sat, Dec 11, 11pm-7am. £15 adv

Elephant and Castle (corsicastudios.com). Fri, Dec 10 and Sat, Dec 11, 10pm-6am each night. £20 night, £35 w/e

We have two pairs of tickets Buzzin’ Fly to give away. To enter, email grabs@tntmagazine.com with ‘Buzzin’ Fly’ in the subject line by noon, Wed. Dec 8.

WIN

hard house/trance

house/garage

rock/metal

techno

CLUB NEWS A new hotspot has arrived in south London as glam clubbing brand Hed Kandi has opened its first UK bar.

The oh-so-chic venue features a neon-lit colourchanging ceiling, sleek booth seating and the iconic Hed Kandi album sleeve artwork. DJs play chilled Kandi lounge tunes during the week and the brand’s signature house at weekends. The Hed Kandi bar is at 38 Clapham High Street, SW4 7UR. US house DJ Roger Sanchez is celebrating 10 years of his clubbing brand Release Yourself with an anniversary album. Sanchez says: “The

Roger Sanchez

10th Anniversary is a reflection of my continuing love affair with what I call house music and its explosive effect on my dance floor.” It features tracks from Prok & Fitch, Filip Le Frick and the Sanchez man himself.

Get it now on Beatport.com.

tntmagazine.com

news & sport

NEWS IN REVIEW

The week that was MONDAY

» TUESDAY » WEDNESDAY » THURSDAY » FRIDAY » SATURDAY » SUNDAY quote unquote “The threats against our lives are a matter of public record.

However, we are taking the appropriate precautions to the degree that we are able when dealing with a superpower.”

WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange is a wanted man after the release of US cables.

wrap up of last week’s events from australia, new zealand and south africa

36

AUSTRALIA

Rednecks vindicated Analysis has shown that the urban fringes of Australian cities are the most hostile to the idea of gay marriage, rather than regional ‘redneck’ voters as was widely perceived.

The news.com.au survery follows pressure on Prime Minister Julia Gillard from within her party to change the law on same-sex unions, which only recognises marriage between a man and a woman.

Julia Gillard

going swimmingly: Sydneysiders turned out for the ‘AIME Strut the Streets’ Guinness record attempt for the world’s largest swimwear parade. The event raised funds for the Australian Indigenous Mentoring Experience but missed the record by 22 participants.

Deluge in regional NSW

Lowy gutted over bid

Parts of regional NSW, some of which have endured 10 years of drought, have been declared natural disaster zones after floods which have caused millions of dollars worth of damage to roads and farms.

A sixth of crops have been wiped out in shires such as Mudgee, Weddin, Wellington, Warrumbungle, Cootamundra, Coonamble, Harden and Young.

Australia’s 2022 World Cup bid chief Frank Lowy said he was “bitterly disappointed” about bombing out in the first round of voting round, losing the event to Qatar.

Meanwhile, fans were left suspicious as the result was leaked to an Arab TV station before Fifa president Sepp Blatter officially announced the decision in Zurich.

*And finally … More than friends

tntmagazine.com

30 of the couple’s close friends, who witnessed the event at Laurel Bank Park.

“You’re my best friend and you make every part of my day better,” Guiso said in the emotional dusk ceremony.

The man and dog decided on the location after stumbling upon a wedding there during an afternoon walk.

“A huge commitment (for Qatar) to build how many stadiums and then pull them apart and send them to the poorer countries around the world.”

Football Federation Australia board member Jack Reilly on Qatar’s World Cup bid.

TNT er h weat rt repo

Puppy love

Avg min Avg max

Adelaide

11

Brisbane

20

22 24

Canberra

16

20

Darwin

26

35

Hobart

17

22

Melbourne

19

31

Perth

11

22

Sydney

21

22

Getty Images, TNT Images

A man has married his dog after declaring he could no longer deal with the guilt of living with him out of wedlock. Joseph Guiso, who lives in Toowoomba, Queensland, tied the knot with his best friend – a five-year-old labrador named Honey, who he adopted five years ago.

“It’s not sexual, it’s just pure love,” he assured onlookers and

“Men who could be Santas, who could project an image which is a magical thing for children, they don’t want to go there because it’s just not economic for them.”

Pensioner advocate Charmaine Crowe decries a law that means pensioners will be paid less than $10 an hour to don the red suit.

■ Casting manager from The Hobbit sacked over racism accusations by actress ■ British-Pakistani woman told she was “too dark” to play a hobbit ■ Director Peter Jackson welcomes all actors and apologises for “incredibly unfortunate error”

Scientists are urgently trying to identify a mysterious disease that has wiped out 80 per cent of farmed Pacific oysters due for harvest next year. Jobs in remote communities, such as Parengarenga, near Cape Reinga, will take a hit.

LOWER NORTH ISLAND

A

The casting agent’s perception of a hobbit and (inset) Naz Humphreys

that he was looking for light-skinned people to play hobbits in a two-part prequel to the Oscar-winning Lord Of The Rings trilogy.

Humphreys, who was hoping for a role as an extra on the film, set up a Facebook group entitled: ‘Hire hobbits

of all colours! Say no to hobbit racism!’

“It’s 2010 and I still can’t believe I’m being discriminated against because I have brown skin,” she said.

Director Peter Jackson explained the situation as an “incredibly unfortunate error” and said all people of the right age and height were welcome to audition.

Facebook, Getty Images

10,000 mourn Pike River miners More than 10,000 mourners turned out to pay tribute to the 29 miners killed in the Pike River mine blast.

Family, friends and members of the public gathered to pay their respects to the victims at an emotional open-air service.

Photos and mementos such as surfboards were left on each of the 29 black-draped tables – each bearing a fallen miner’s helmet, lamp and name.

What’s happening across the country

UPPER NORTH ISLAND

SUMMARY

casting manager for The Hobbit has been sacked for telling a Pakistani woman she was “too dark” to play any one of the diminutive, fictional creatures.

Having waited in line at a casting session in Hamilton for three hours to audition, British Naz Humphreys was turned away and later told that her skin tone was not suitable for the part.

The Waikato Times reported that video footage from the audition showed the casting manager telling participants

COAST TO COAST

Reverend Tim Mora told the mourners: “There was no divine fate at work to snatch their lives away.

“We live in a physical world governed by natural laws that are consistent and predictable.

Those same laws when pushed to the edge can be incredibly dangerous.” The Anglican vicar was speaking at the service at Omoto Racecourse, in Greymouth, South Island,

which formed the centrepiece to a national day of mourning.

And Rev Mora revealed the town had been “overwhelmed” by support from around the globe.

He said: “We are not in this alone, the entire world is standing with us.”

Mine boss Peter Whittall thanked every one of the mourners who attended Thursday’s service.

Two men have been arrested after throwing a joint’s worth of cannabis, hidden inside a tennis ball, into Rimutaka Prison. After a tip-off, an alternative exercise area was assigned for the prisoners’ recreation period, leaving the target area empty, with just a staff member waiting for the drop-off. The men were charged with possession of cannabis to supply.

UPPER SOUTH ISLAND It could take weeks to put out a coal fire caused by a fourth explosion in the Pike River mine, where the bodies of 29 miners remain.

A Gorniczy Agregat Gasniczy, or GAG machine is injecting water vapour and CO2 into the mine so rescuers can enter.

LOWER SOUTH ISLAND A cheesy garlic bread crisp flavour, invented by Queenstown’s Hayley Kyte, was beaten by a Sunday Roast (the crispy bits left in the pan) flavour in a competition run by Bluebird.

tntmagazine.com

NEWS & SPORT

Dark day as ‘racist’ casting agent sacked

NEW ZEALAND

37

41956

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SUMMARY

■ South African President Jacob Zuma addresses global summit of communists in Centurion ■ Zuma urges unity among attending parties, spruiking the ANC’s commitment to progressive change ■ Zuma concedes a failing employment market remains an urgent concern

SAPA

EASTERN CAPE

GAUTENG Jacob Zuma acknowledged job growth remains a problem

Zuma quoted former ANC President Oliver Tambo, emphasising a need to defend the national democratic movement. “Unity should bind the alliance and progressive forces around the world to succeed in implementing a progressive agenda,” he said.

Zuma also cited the ANC’s tripartite alliance, which has sometimes been troubled in the past, as a united coalition that continued to drive

progressive change in postapartheid South Africa.

The three-day meeting was the first ICWP gathering to be held on the African continent and Zuma used the platform to call on communists to deliver on jobs, pointing out that employment crises persist, even as economies recover from the global downturn.

In South Africa alone, more than one million jobs were lost during the recession.

Author: I’m scared of blacks Author and columnist Annelie Botes has sparked controversy by telling Afrikaans newspaper Rapport that she fears blacks.

The author of K Sello Duiker Award-winning novel, ThulaThula, said that she disliked Port Elizabeth because she felt threatened by its population of black people.

“If a courier comes to my door and he’s white, coloured or Indian, I’d have no problem

What’s happening across the country

Four brothers have been arrested over the stabbing and recircumcision of a man who illegally circumcised their siblings aged 15 and 16.

The 18-year-old man had himself undergone the initiation ritual only a few months earlier in Ngobozi village, Libode, Transkei.

P

resident Jacob Zuma addressed a global summit of communist groups and urged them to band together, stressing the importance of unity in the face of fractiousness and individual agendas.

“A majority of communists part ways because, once they believe in something, they have a culture to believe in it seriously. Unity is crucial,” Zuma told delegates representing about 60 countries at the 12th International Meeting of Communist and Workers Parties (ICWP) in Centurion.

COAST TO COAST

inviting him in for a glass of water. But I would feel threatened by a black man,” she was quoted as saying.

Botes, who plans to emigrate to England, also described black men as the “face of crime”.

Her comments have sparked a flurry of debate.

Urging Botes to leave the country with her “cancer that is racism”, South African writer Zukiswa Wanner, said:

“Reconciliation continues to be about black people knowing how to speak English or Afrikaans, but never about learning the language or culture of the black people.”

Frans Cronje, of the South African Institute of Race Relations, said: “This idea that we will completely eradicate racism is ridiculous. No society has done that. Prejudice is part of the human psyche.”

Grandparents and their two adult sons have been arrested over a child porn ring in Pretoria. Toddlers were said to have been raped by their relatives and forced to have sex with each other while being filmed. Three boys and a girl, aged between four and 15, were removed from three of the 22 homes swooped by police.

KWAZULUNATAL Durban has shunned traditional festive decorations in the city for flowers and butterflies.

Democratic Alliance leader Tex Collins said the political correctness was “sad”.

WESTERN CAPE Plans to construct a new grand prix circuit in Cape Town are afoot. They could result in the Formula One returning to SA for the first time since 1993. F1 boss Bernie Ecclestone said after talks with the government its chances were “OK”.

tntmagazine.com

NEWS & SPORT

Zuma calls for unity among communists

SOUTH AFRICA

39

Sporting life MONDAY

RUGBY LEAGUE Representatives from all NRL clubs gather to discuss a new broadcast deal and the planned expansion that could eventually see the competition split into two conferences.

TUESDAY

RUGBY LEAGUE Dual premiership winner Dane Carlaw is set to rejoin the Brisbane Broncos on a one-year deal after the 30-year-old secured a release from the Catalans Dragons.

WEDNESDAY

MOTORSPORT Formula One driver Mark Webber is named Australia’s highest-earning sports star for 2010, raking in $13.4m. Hope that makes him feel better about not winning the title.

THURSDAY

RUGBY UNION All Blacks skipper Richie McCaw wins the IRB award for player of the year, the star flanker becoming the first player to take out the top individual award three times.

FRIDAY

FOOTBALL Socceroos keeper Mark Schwarzer re-signs with Fulham, inking a two-year contract, ending persistent speculation about a switch to Arsenal in the January transfer window.

SATURDAY

CRICKET Aussie fast bowler Brett Lee insists he is ready to return to international cricket and has set his sights on a ODI call-up.

Let’s face it – decent Aussie bowlers are in short supply.

SUNDAY

BASKETBALL Andrew Bogut returns from his injury lay-off with a dominant display for the Milwaukee Bucks, scoring 31 points and hauling in 18 rebounds against a depleted Orlando Magic.

I want to sit “ around talking shit,

listening to Mansour Bahrami and Henri Leconte and their stories as they smoke cigars

”

Aussie tennis player Pat Rafter is loving life on the veterans’ tour

MONDAY FOOTBALL Liverpool v Aston Villa Both sides need a win 7pm Sky Sports 1 TUESDAY FOOTBALL FC Twente v Tottenham Spurs still aiming for top spot 7.30pm Sky Sports 4 WEDNESDAY FOOTBALL Marseille v Chelsea Will Chelsea find their form?

7.30pm Sky Sports 2 THURSDAY RUGBY UNION Oxford v Cambridge Toffs playing a bit of rugger 2pm Sky Sports 1 FRIDAY POKER Fult Tilt Poker Millions Saffa Seth Webber is in there 7pm Sky Sports 2 SATURDAY FOOTBALL Newcastle v Liverpool Mid-table madness 4.45pm ESPN SUNDAY FOOTBALL Tottenham v Chelsea Spurs could do Chelsea 3,30pm Sky Sports 1

PUB TALK: BRITISH SPORT EXPLAINED

Getty Images

England’s rugby expats What’s happened?

The RFU, the body that runs English rugby, has said players based overseas should not be picked for England. Of course, the new decree won’t come into effect until after next year’s World Cup so they’ve left themselves some cover from criticism.

What are the implications?

Only time will tell whether the new ruling compels England hopefuls to stay at home and it will be interesting to see if the RFU stands firm in the face of some big names crossing the channel. Jonny Wilkinson (left) plays in France currently, so would be ineligible.

tntmagazine.com

NEWS & SPORT

This week’s winners and losers

41

rugby

Boks allowed to play Maori

NEWS & SPORT

Will Genia was a stand-out for the Barbarians

42

Baa Baas edge Boks Barbarians 26 D Mitchell 2 J O’Connor Q Geldenhuys tries J O’Connor 3 cons

v

20 South Africa O Ndungane B Botha B Maku tries E Jantjies con pen

The Springboks were outplayed and out-run by the Barbarians, with the handful of Australian backs playing in the invitational side all impressing.

The Baa Baas turned down an early chance for a straightforward penalty, instead opting for a scrum; their refusal to accept any threepoint gifts from the referee paid off when Drew Mitchell broke through for the first try.

The Boks showed no such desire to reject penalty chances when their rivals were penalised 30 yards, 20-year-old flyhalf Elton Jantjies calmly kicking his side’s first points.

But another Wallaby, this time James

O’Connor, soon found himself on the end of a sweeping Barbarians move, going over unchallenged after accepting a flighted pass from Ma’a Nonu. Two Aussies then combined, Adam Ashley-Cooper setting up Mitchell for his second try, with O’Connor coolly adding the conversion.

South Africa responded after the break with wing Odwa Ndungane intercepting Nonu’s pass to run half the length of the field for a converted try. But the Baa Baas struck back with a move down the left which ended with replacement Quintin Geldenhuys barging his way over, O’Connor converting for a 26-10 lead.

In reply, Bakkies Botha crashed his way over, and Bandise Maku did likewise but it was all too little too late for the Springboks.

South Africa’s rugby union will allow matches against New Zealand Maori after amending a post-apartheid policy preventing its teams from competing against opposition selected along racial lines.

SARU said it adopted a new stance following its general council meeting, allowing South African teams to play against “any team which has the official blessing of its national governing body.”

In 2009, SARU’s policy on teams selected on race prevented a game between the Springboks and Maori. This year, SARU apologised to Maori players and black players in its own country, who were discriminated against by the apartheid-era rugby administration.

The apartheid regime, aided by the New Zealand Rugby Union, kept Maori players from New Zealand tours of South Africa in 1928, 1949 and 1960.

When New Zealand refused to send a whites-only team in 1967, South Africa cancelled the tour.

South Africa finally relented in 1970 when three Maori and a Samoan in the All Blacks squad were considered “honorary whites.” The Maori met the Springboks when they toured in 1921, 1956, 1965 and lost, but drew 12-12 in 1981.

Maori rugby celebrated its centenary this year with wins over Ireland and England.

Robinson backs Wallabies scrum to come good

tntmagazine.com

“We definitely have the personnel to have one of the best scrums in the world,” Robinson said after returning to Sydney. “I think we have to be adaptable to every scrum we play against. The northern hemisphere scrummage differently to we do down here in the south.”

Robinson also revealed he had been expected to do more around the field after being demoted to the bench during the tour.

“I think Robbie (Deans) definitely wants to have an overall approach,”Robinsn said. “He just doesn’t want a scrummaging frontrower, he wants a player that can pass the ball.”

Benn Robinson

Getty Images

Wallabies stalwart Benn Robinson is convinced Australia possess the personnel to field one of the best scrums in the world despite some shaky efforts in that area during the end-ofyear tour.

The 26-year-old Waratahs frontrower certainly made a statement to coach Robbie Deans with the barnstorming performance off the bench in Australia’s record-breaking 59-16 thrashing of France in Paris. But perhaps surprisingly, Robinson does now resent the unending scrutiny of the Wallabies’ inconsistency in the critical set-piece.

PREMIER LEAGUE Chelsea’s Ashley Cole squanders a chance

THE PLAYER

Samir Nasri

NEWS & SPORT

ARSENAL If not for the Frenchman’s double, a day that ended with Arsenal atop the table could have instead brought familiar recriminations about Arsenal’s lack of killer instinct and defensive frailty. Fulham could have drawn, even won, the match but two strikes from Nasri – the second an absolute belter where he slalomed through the defence before converting from a tight angle – were enough to get Arsenal over the line.

43

IN REVIEW THE ISSUE

Managers on-message The entire English football establishment was outraged by the way their 2018 World Cup bid was snubbed but the best line came from Spurs boss Harry Redknapp (above), who compared the whole saga to X Factor: “You meet up with the judges for a couple of days, have a chat and say, ‘You should be voting for me really.

I’m a sexy bird, I’ll get my gear off for you.’ What’s it all about?”

Well said, Harry. Well said.

Chelsea held to draw After Manchester United’s match against Blackpool was postponed due to a frozen pitch, Chelsea had the chance to return to the top of the table when they hosted Everton.

After taking the lead in the 42nd minute when Didier Drogba converted a penalty, Chelsea looked bound for top spot but Everton found a second wind, culminating in a late equaliser from Jermaine Beckford.

Chelsea fans insisted Everton keeper Tim Howard should have been sent off in conceding the first-half penalty, no doubt chastened by the fact their side have now gone four games in the league without a win.

Arsenal were the beneficiaries of Chelsea’s

draw – despite failing to convince against Fulham, the Gunners snuck ahead in the 75th minute, Samir Nasri completing a spectacular brace, to clinch a 2-1 win that sent them top.

Manchester City scored early through Carlos Tevez and then held on for a crucial win against sixth-placed Bolton, who could have dislodged City in the top four had they won by a couple of goals.

Elsewhere, in-form Tottenham allowed a three-point gap to open between them and fourth-placed Manchester City when they came away from Birmingham City with only a draw, Sébastien Bassong’s first-half goal cancelled out by Craig Gardner.

LOOKING AHEAD

Getty Images

Ancelotti worried by players’ lack of desire

Carlo Ancelotti

Chelsea sit only two adript adrift of new league leaders Arsenal, but their listless performance against battling Everton ensures Carlo Ancelotti’s men will spend an uncomfortable week in the spotlight.

Chelsea’s last top-flight win came against Fulham on November 10 – they have since lost to Sunderland and Birmingham and drawn against Newcastle and Everton.

With rumours of strained relations behind the scenes – club owner Roman Abramovich appears to once again be meddling unduly in the football operations side of things – Chelsea are in desperate need of a win against Tottenham this weekend.

But Spurs will be intent on claiming a big scalp to bolster their claim on a top-four spot

and Ancelotti admitted Chelsea needed to improve to avoid another poor result.

“The result was not good, we wanted to win but we are still living in a difficult moment,” Ancelotti said after the draw with Everton.

“We have to stay focused and use our next game to move on from this period.”

“I am worried yes, because we haven’t won a lot of games. The second half was totally wrong. We have to do better.”

ON THE BOX SATURDAY 4.45pm ESPN NEWCASTLE UNITED V LIVERPOOL

SUNDAY 1pm Sky Sports 1 BOLTON V BLACKBURN ROVERS

SUNDAY 3.30pm Sky Sports 1 TOTTENHAM V CHELSEA

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NEWS & SPORT

cricket

44

Dark times for Aussies Rarely has an Australian bowling attack appeared so toothless, so incapable of making an impression on an opposition batting lineup; it seems a shortcoming destined to see Australia lose a home Ashes series for the first time in 24 years.

During the second Test in Adelaide, the English batsmen continued to fill their boots – Alistair Cook scored his second century of the series while Kevin Pietersen treated the Australian bowlers with contempt as England built a massive first-innings lead.

Of course, the Australian batsmen contributed to the team’s hopeless position, collapsing with shocking haste after Ricky Ponting had won the toss and elected to bat on the first morning.

Simon Katich was run out in the first over, without facing a ball, before Ponting was caught behind off the next delivery.

Michael Clarke, in arguably the worst form of his career and apparently carrying an injury, didn’t last long either, departing in the third over as Australia slumped to an alarming 3-2.

Michael Hussey mounted another rescue mission before falling for 93, just short of a second consecutive century.

The tail again failed to wag, Australia bowled out for 245.

The Engish batsmen, however, had a far easier time of things, and Aussie all-rounder Shane Watson admitted that an improved bowling performance is essential if Australia are to even compete.

“That’s what we’ve been talking about over the last week, really,” Watson said.

“You can’t take anything away from the English, they’ve batted very well.”

What chance a turnaround when the third Test begins in Perth next Thursday?

Kevin Pietersen during his double-century

New Zealand skipper Daniel Vettori is playing the ‘stay positive’ card after his side slumped to their third straight defeat at the hands of a second-string Indian side.

It was the Black Caps’ ninth successive one-day defeat from completed matches as they were humbled by nine wickets after losing the first match at Guwahati by 40 runs and the second at Jaipur by eight wickets.

New Zealand’s batsmen will again be in the firing line after posting just 224 for nine batting first, though their bowling attack is also struggling and may have been unable to defend even 300, given their lack of penetration.

India, guided by a second successive unbeaten hundred by stand-in captain Gautam

Ryan McLaren has been named in South Africa’s 15-man squad to face India in the first Test starting on December 16 in Centurion.

The remainder of the squad is the same as the one that faced Pakistan last month.

The selectors originally planned to announce a 12-man squad for all three Tests against India, so players who were not picked could concentrate on the round of SuperSport Series matches, but changed their minds. » South Africa squad: Graeme Smith (capt), Hashim Amla, Johan Botha, Mark Boucher, AB de Villiers, JP Duminy, Paul Harris, Jacques Kallis, Ryan McLaren, Morne Morkel, Wayne Parnell, Alviro Petersen, Ashwell Prince, Dale Steyn, Lonwabo Tsotsobe

Daniel Vettori

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Gambhir, who finished on 126 not out, passed the target for the loss of just one wicket and with 63 balls to spare to go 3-0 up with two matches to play.

“We are playing a very good team at the moment, so it’s difficult to play well against them but we are also disappointed with our own performances,” Vettori said.

“I think we can perform better than what we have shown so far but we still have to sit back and appreciate how well India have played.”

“That’s what happens in cricket and you have got to deal with it and you have to make up for it.”

ON THE BOX tuesday 9am Sky Sports 3 india v new zealand (4th odi)

friday 9am Sky Sports 4 india v new zealand (5th odi)

Getty Images

Kiwis slump to series loss in India

McLaren joins Proteas squad

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one in a

million

Joberg lad Seth Webber this week has the chance to fulfil every amateur poker player’s fantasy Words tom sturrock

W

annabe card sharps be warned – Seth Webber’s story may induce you to quit your job and try to make a living playing poker. Best look away now if you’re easily tempted by the lure of a quick buck.

Webber, 29, hails from Johannesburg but now lives in Brighton. After quitting his job a few years back, Webber began playing poker full-time. This Friday, having qualified online, Webber will sit down at the final table of the Full Tilt Poker Millions to play for the winnertakes-all purse of US$1m.

“It’s life-changing,” Webber says, “I turned $30 into $30,000 profit on Full Tilt last year, but this is a chance to win a million.”

rapid rise Webber has already pocketed $90,000 for making it to the last eight, so his progress at this tournament already represents a career breakthrough, but Webber admits the early days were tough.

“I was working for a bank, for Lloyds, as a debt collector and I just said to myself, ‘I can do this’,” he recalls. “It was daunting because I quit my job but still had to pay my bills – it was rocky when I only had

Getty Images, TNT Images

tntmagazine.com

Fast money: Seth Webber has a shot at a US$1m purse

Webber (left) went the long way around to qualify for the final

NEWS & SPORT 47

a few bucks to my name.”

“I’ve been pro on and off since then,” he says. “I’ve had bad and good years but last year I was totally pro.”

After qualifying for Poker Millions online, Webber came second in his heat, affording him a second bite of the cherry at a runners-up table. He came out on top, booking a seat at the final table wih seven other guys.

Getty Images, TNT Images

I haven’t been “ able to focus on anything else ” THE PRESSURE MOUNTS Webber will be facing off against more accomplished players, whose career winnings dwarf his. It’s business as usual for the likes of Gus Hansen, who Webber describes as “a crazy player, a genius”. For Webber, though, this is the biggest game of his life.

“I’ve just been trying to stave off total mental meltdown,” he says. “I’ve been playing cards as much as I can because I can’t really focus on anything else.”

However, Webber is convinced he has a real chance of taking the money; indeed, his status as the great unknown on the final table could work in his favor.

“For most of these guys, they don’t

think it’s that much money – they’ll gamble a lot and go hard on any coin flip,” he says.

“I’ve sat back and been pretty cautious, hopefully I can keep doing that and a few of these guys go out. None of them have heard of me.”

THAT’S POKER!

He’s now raking in five figures in a single poker tournament – maybe more if the chips fall his way on Friday night – but Webber claims he started out just like every other mug player, despairing at the injustice of it all as another of his tenners disappears into one of PLAYING TIGHT his mates’ wallet.

Playing cautiously has paid off for Webber “I used to be that guy,” Webber – he’s survived by resisting the urge to insists, “but I’ve learned from my gamble early and weathering pressure mistakes – don’t be too proud to applied by more experienced opponents. take advice from better players. Read “Most guys are pretty friendly but a few books, watch clips of the pros. And are quite arrogant,” he says. “There’ll be don’t be too aggressive. Don’t a bit of chat at the table – they’ll say that try to take the shot too early.” you don’t have many chips left or that Webber has some other you need to win a pot.” tips for players whose weekly “In the second heat, I was pretty game yields only futility close to a meltdown – all the pros can and frustration. smell fear and one guy, every time I’d “Stay away from Ace-rag raise, he’d re-raise; he was really until later in the tournament, coming after me. I decided to wait when you’ve got good it out. I could have gone allposition,” he says. in. That’s the pressure.”

“And people overDespite the soaring play small pairs. stakes, Webber is You want to flat confident he won’t call and hopefully be brought undone hit your set on by the magnitude the flop.” of the situation.

Nor does “If I was doing Webber have something else, I’d any time for crumble,” he admits, ‘lucky hands’: “but I think that, as “Two Aces are soon as I sit down at the the best, that’s table, I’m playing cards.” all I believe.”

Gus Hansen: “A crazy player”

SALES EXECUTIVES £22,000 BASIC with a very realistic £65,000 OTE.

George Media Ltd is seeking 2 full-time, enterprising and successful sales professionals to join our Richmond office and our leading African digital publication: The African Business Journal – www.tabj.co.za Successful candidates will be responsible for producing and managing media projects for major companies across Africa in a wide range of industries, so great communication skills are a must along with the ability to think on your feet and make decisions.

Applicants must have some direct sales experience and be very comfortable when dealing with senior business executives.

Applicants must possess enthusiasm, tenacity, have an excellent work ethic and the drive and desire to earn in excess of £65,000 per annum.

ABOUT GEORGE MEDIA. George Media is an international media company that publishes on-line business magazines that attract a combined monthly readership of over 2 million senior business executives. To find out more about George Media and to see our full portfolio of publications, please visit our corporate web-site at www.georgenetwork.com

We offer a competitive starting salary, which will be reviewed with experience and results, a very generous uncapped commission structure and genuine opportunities for advancement within the company.

If you are interested in a fresh career, or want to be part of a fast paced, modern and expanding media company, then please respond to this posting by e-mail with your resume and covering letter.

Location: Richmond, West London Compensation: £22,000 Starting Salary, plus commission and benefits. Hours: Full time Monday to Friday.

Please email benw@tabj.co.za to apply.

We will be looking to interview before Xmas with successful applicants starting in January 2011.

tntjobs.co.uk RENARD RESOURCES T: 020 7287 2299 www.renardresources.co.uk Est. in 1996. A boutique hospitality recruitment agency supplying to 5 star hotels, restaurants, contract and event caterers.

BUYERS & SELLERS T: 0207 243 5400 www.buyersandsellersonline.co.uk Leading electrical appliances retailer selling premium brands. Established for over 50 years.

Dynamic work environment with ample opportunities.

KORCO MARKETING T: 0207 253 9099 Fast growing, fresh and funky Sales and Marketing Organisation requires fun loving, enthusiastic people with great communication skills to fill, direct sales and marketing openings on our fantastic team.

BEST OF THE WEB JOB OF THE WEEK: Event & Silver Service staff wanted Location: London Salary: £6 - £8 + Holiday We require experienced, energetic individuals for the current busy period to join our team of event waiting staff/silver service staff on a flexible basis, work is available ASAP. Get in touch!

Nelson Pereira | Nelson@renardresources.co.uk

JOB OF THE WEEK: Sales Consultant Location: West London Salary: £18 000 + Face-to-face, internet and telephone sales; applicants should be motivated and enjoy working as part of a team. Previous sales experience is advantageous but not necessary as product training will be provided.

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JOB OF THE WEEK: Direct Sales and Marketing We have 24 openings available with full sales, customer service and product/ services training given. No experience No Problem Full in house training available for all successful applicants. A Business development programme is available for the more ambitious candidates where opportunities to progress within the company to either team leadership or management. Sound like you?

Call asap on 0207 253 9099 | CV’s to admin@korcomarketing.com

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CAREERS

Your monthly guide to moving to Australia and New Zealand There are plenty of jobs in childcare

ON THE JOB

49

BLAIR COLLINS Career Marketing Age 30 Lives Auckland, New Zealand How long were you in London and why did you leave?

I was in London for nearly four years. The decision to leave was a lifestyle choice.

What do you do for a living back in NZ?

I’ve only just got back and I’m currently looking for work, but my new role will be in the global marketing space.

Did your overseas experience help you find a job?

Time will tell, but I was fortunate to have gained some amazing experience that I would never had been exposed to if I had stayed in NZ. The size difference of the market in the UK compared to New Zealand, of course, had a major impact on the experience that I gained within my field.

TNT Images

What do you miss about life in London?

The key things would be friends and the extensive travel that is at your finger tips.

RETURNING HOME

RETURNING HOME

Childcare tops list of hot jobs C

hildcare has topped the list of Australia’s booming industries, according to IBISWorld. The business information analyst compiled a list taking into account the need for skilled workers, the prospect of growth in wages and a prosperous future.

New regulation has been introduced to boost staff-to-child ratios and the qualifications of childcare workers, creating a spike in jobs and wages. IBISWorld

general manager Robert Bryant said: ”Legislative changes will come on line progressively over the next five years, increasing wage costs as operators will have to employ more staff – and pay higher rates for staff with further qualifications.”

He forecast employment growth for the industry of 27 per cent in the years to 2016, with wages growth around 4.2 per cent.

The list of Australia’s growth

industries also included veterinary services, integrated logistics, health and finance.

“It might seem glamorous to study criminology or marine biology, but not everyone who undertakes this type of study is going to land a job,” Bryant added.

tntjobs.co.uk Sign up for job alerts and get more career advice at tntjobs.co.uk

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THE LONG WAY ROUND Looking to leave the UK but not quite ready to return home?

Then work as a long-haul tour guide along the way WORDS CAROL DRIVER

Stunning: glaciers in Patagonia, Argentina

W

Tour leaders can have their hands full...

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orking as a tour operator in farflung countries is the perfect way to see the rest of the world if you’re planning to return home after living in the UK. Whether you’re heading to Australia, New Zealand, South Africa or you fancy a long-haul trip to finish your travels in style, getting paid to see the globe is the perfect way.

You could find yourself trekking with mountain gorillas in Rwanda or sandboarding in the Peruvian desert – with any thoughts of a 9-to-5 job just distant memories.

You’ll have to be committed, as you may find yourself leading back-to-back tours for 18 months – with some individual tours lasting nearly six months.

But when you’re exploring amazing destinations such as Central and South America, Africa, the Middle East, India or Asia, it’s definitely a case of ‘nice work if

JOIN HAYS

A CAREER THAT TAKES YOU PLACES Recruitment consultants wanted for Australia and New Zealand As the leading specialist recruiting group, we are always seeking talented professionals ready to take up a new challenge on the global stage. Our rapid growth presents a number of exciting opportunities for both experienced recruiters and people interested in a career in recruitment.

Experienced recruitment consultants We are looking for ambitious and talented recruiters with a proven track record to join our expert teams. Your passion and drive will help you to exceed sales targets by winning new business and maximising existing client relationships.

You will be knowledgeable in your area of specialisation and willing to share your expertise with candidates and clients to achieve results. In return, our strong brand, exceptional back office infrastructure and industry leading training will help you achieve your true potential with us. Visa assistance is offered.

hays.com.au

Trainee recruitment consultants We also need returning residents who have outstanding customer service experience and a passion for people to join our growing teams. In return for your focus and ambition to succeed, we offer world class training and support to develop your career. An intensive nine month training programme is only the start of a career that may see you grow into a capable business or people manager.

If you’d like to join a team that’s going places, please email globalinkteam@hays.com or call 020 7374 4300 for a confidential discussion.

RETURNING HOME

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RETURNING HOME 53

Getty Images, Tucan Travel

You could end up working in India

agent and book a tour. “We look for people who relate well to other people, who have proven experience Life on the road... dealing with pressure, and who can motivate others to ensure you can get it’. So what do you need to every person on tour has the holiday make sure you do ‘get it’? of a lifetime!”

Zoe Brooks, recruitment manager at All tour companies offer training to Tucan Travel, says it’s “imperative” for make sure chosen recruits are equipped tour leaders to have great communication with the necessary skills needed to ensure and leadership skills. they can cope with all possible situations.

And, she adds, it’s important to “be But, if you don’t fancy spending that yourself”: “If leaders are putting on a long on the road, tour guides can also front, that facade will inevitably crack as lead shorter trips. patience is stretched and this is a disaster.”

Filiz Gokce Sener, assistant general As a tour guide, you’ll be in charge of manager at Travel Talk Tours, says the everything – although for tours on trucks longest tour they operate is 16 days, with Tucan, this is shared with the driver. covering Egypt and Jordan.

“You pretty much have to be available But the challenges are still the same to clients twenty-four-seven on tour,” – with local customs and traditions as Zoe says. “That’s not to say you don’t well as language and handling difficult have time to have fun, you just have to situations as the main challenges. be prepared to deal with any number of “You will need to be easygoing, have eventualities at any given time. leadership skills, a friendly attitude as “If you are unable to cope with these well as being energetic,” Filiz says. demands, then chances are it’s going to be “You’ll be in charge of taking care of the miserable travel experience, and, what’s group, providing them with information worse, one your clients are likely to share.” and leading them to restaurants, bars If you feel you can handle the where travellers can enjoy themselves pressure while ensuring your within their budget.” group has an amazing trip, And in terms of making sure now’s an ideal time to start you’re prepared for what applying, as companies are will be an adventure of a looking to recruit. lifetime, Filiz adds: “You’ll Claire Hanney, need to be ready to face recruitment and operations all difficulties, such as supervisor at Contiki, says adverse weather recruits must make sure conditions and they’re able to deliver difficult customers. what is promised in the “Make sure you brochure. “Working as study the destination road crew is amazing, but you would like to go is hard work all day, every to and learn all the day,” she says. local knowledge.”

“If you’re looking for an Trust us when we say Tour guides must easy way to see far away the hard work will make sure travellers countries – head to your travel definitely be worth it. are kept happy

MY EXPERIENCE Rebecca Whiffin Age 38 From New Zealand, living in London Job General manager, Tucan Travel Where were you a tour guide? I was a guide for nine-and-a-half years. I’ve been across Europe, done ski seasons in Andorra and Austria and travelled Central and South America.

What challenges could tour guides face? The world is a pretty volatile

place. You could be in destinations which have political unrest or natural disasters. It’s a fantastic job so long as you keep an open mind.

Best experience? Watching baby green

sea turtles hatching and make their way down to the ocean was one of many amazing experiences.

Worst? The most challenging was being

caught up in the coup in Venezuela in 2002. We couldn’t leave the hotel and had little food. When we finally made it to the airport, we had a 17-hour wait.

Once-in-a-lifetime trip

tntmagazine.com

RETURNING HOME

MONEY Your monthly guide to moving to Australia and New Zealand

WHERE DOES YOUR DOSH GO?

54

Chris Lichti Job Lab technician Lives Melbourne, Australia Age 25

Retailers are enticing shoppers with sales

Bleak winter ahead for sales

ussie retailers are braced for a bleak Christmas after figures this week reveal a shock fall in sales.

Retail spending fell by a hefty 1.1 per cent in October compared to the previous month, the biggest fall since July 2009 when the impact of the government’s stimulus

A

MAKES YOUR MONEY GO FURTHER

tntmagazine.com

consumers are being a little bit more cautious with their spending given the global economic conditions we have been seeing in recent times.”

The data follows national accounts for the September quarter, which showed gross domestic product growing by a mere 0.2 per cent.

AU$356M ‘WASTE’

FIRST MALL TO BE SOLD

AU$356m has been wasted on the Sydney Metro transport project scrapped by the government. It also meant other transport plans weren’t a priority, NSW Auditor-general Peter Achterstraat said. He called on the government to review how the process was handled to avoid a recurrence.

New Zealand’s first shopping centre has been sold for NZ$174m. Miwi Income Property Trust has struck a deal to purchase LynnMall Shopping Centre in Auckland.

It’s seeking Overseas Investment Office from AMP Capital Property Portfolio.

The centre has 130 shops.

Rent, alcohol, train fare, eating out.

How did prices compare with Australia? Alcohol

can be reasonably priced compared to some places in Melbourne. Transport is also expensive – but at least the trains run on time. You can eat at so many great places in Melbourne, and cheaply too.

Budget advice for people going home? Leave

yourself about AU$1000 so you can at least pay for your car registration and any forgotten bills.

Any money tips? You can find plenty of good deals if you shop around.

THEY SHOOT, THEY … MISS England would have forked out £5.8bn to stage the 2018 World Cup, which was handed to Russia. TNT looks at how much other sporting events have cost... » Canada’s 2010 Winter slashed £29million from its

David Beckham in Zurich for the bid announcement

Olympics soared to C$1.76bn, of which C$580m was stumped up by the taxpayer. » Wembley Stadium in London is the most expensive sporting venue in the world, costing more than £900m. » The UK government just

2012 Olympics budget... however, it’s still expected to cost more than £9.3bn. » It won’t be the most expensive though – that goes to China after it forked out a whopping $40bn on hosting its 2008 Games.

TNT Images

If you’re about to head home, chances are you’re taking a battered credit card along with you.

No doubt that at some point during your travels, or your time in the UK, you’ve had to ask a favour or two from your friendly bank manager.

With that in mind, it’s worthwhile to make sure that you’re not paying an extortionate amount in interest each month – so look online for comparison websites.

Creditcardcompare.com.au is an Australia-based site on which you can clearly see who’s offering the best deal.

You can also see what rates are being offered on balance transfers – and, if it saves you some dosh each month, it’s worth a click of a mouse.

cash handouts was fading.

“These figures should be a reminder to the (Reserve Bank) that the rate rise in November was heavy-handed and premature,” Russell Zimmerman of the Australian Retailers Association, said.

Treasurer Wayne Swan said: “It is not surprising that

What was your biggest expense in London?

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TRAVEL GLOBAL VISION Burj Khalifa, the world tallest tower, is silhouetted at sunset in Dubai. The construction and real

TRAVEL

estate sectors in Dubai have registered an almost five per cent fall in 2010, after being hit hard by the financial crisis.

Photo by Marwan Naamani/ AFP/Getty Images)

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SHORT BREAK Fireworks explode over the Brandenburg Gate

TRAVEL 59

OUT WITH A

BANG Welcome in the New Year by joining revellers in one of these 10 sizzling cities WORDS JANINE KELSO

New Year’s Eve

Getty Images

THE WORLD

Edinburgh: expect a huge street party

EDINBURGH, SCOTLAND What: Hogmanay used to be a wildly disorganised snogfest that rumbled through the Scottish capital pretty much ignored by the rest of the world. Now, New Year celebrations have metamorphosed into a huge street party for more than 80,000 revellers. The party is strictly off limits to those without a ticket, which costs £15. Midnight arrives in an orgy of fireworks and the world’s largest Auld Lang Syne to bring in the New Year.

Getting there: Take the train to Edinburgh with East Coast. Fares start from £26 when booked online.

See: edinburghhogmanay.com

REYKJAVIK, ICELAND What: After an early dinner, look out for neighbourhood bonfires where you can enjoy drinking and singing with the locals. Watch the striking fireworks display that lights up the city, before heading downtown where bars and clubs throb until at least 5am.

Getting there: Fly with Iceland Air and Iceland Express. Fares from £490 return.

See: visiticeland.com TOKYO, JAPAN What: Make a beeline for the Meiji Jingu shrine along with two million other revellers to pray for health and happiness in the year ahead. Shibuya is loaded with hip after-dark haunts – there’s even a countdown to midnight outside the train

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SHORT BREAK

Hit Times Square, New York for NYE

There’s always fun to be had in Glasgow

station, festooned by blinding neon adverts.

Getting there: Fly with Air China, KLM or Air France. From £622 return.

See: seejapan.co.uk

GOA, INDIA What: The gorgeous palm-fringed beaches of Goa are the place to head for an epic bender at New Year’s Eve. Party for three or four days at Anjuna beach resort, where you’ll find space cakes galore and gorgeous sunrises, as well as the odd sacred cow.

Getting there: Fly with Kingfisher, Qatar and Jet Airways. From £1000 return.

See: incredibleindia.org

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ISTANBUL, TURKEY What: Expect loud techno music and great fireworks throughout the city.

Taksim Square and Istiklal Caddesi will be packed with people, including plenty of tourists. Hit the bricks in the Nisantasi neighbuorhood for the street party scene or rock the casbah at clubs Babylon, Nayah and Crystal.

Watch out for the sparklers that locals throw about in the streets.

Getting there: Fly with BA, easyJet or Turkish airlines.

See: english.istanbul.com SYDNEY, AUSTRALIA What: A music and fireworks extravaganza can be found on Sydney Harbour Bridge, best enjoyed from one of

the boats in the harbour. No need to wrap up warm for NYE Down Under, just bring your shorts and thongs, and plenty of beer.

Getting there: Fly to Sydney with British Airways. From £1500 return.

See: visitnsw.com

PRAGUE, CZECH REPUBLIC What: See in the New Year with a bang by watching a razzle-dazzle midnight fireworks display over Prague Castle and the Vitava River. Romantics can see in the New Year on a lively dinner cruise along the Vitava River. The city spills over with pubs, bars and clubs in which you can continue your celebrations.

Getting there: Fly direct with Wizz Air and easyJet. Fares from £187.

See: czechtourism.co.uk BERLIN, GERMANY What: More than a million people flock to the Brandenburg Gate for the world’s biggest open-air New Year’s Eve party.

Expect tents hosted by superstar DJs and big name bands, laser and light shows, food stands and bars, and an eye-popping fireworks display to welcome in the New Year and best of all, it’s completely free. wrap up warm as Berlin can chilly.

Getting there: Fly direct with Ryanair and EasyJet. From £167 return.

See: germany-tourism.co.uk

Getty Images

NEW YORK CITY, USA What: One million people converge on Times Square on New Year’s Eve to goggle at the legendary glittering ball drop from the top of One Times Square.

Expect pyrotechnics, live music and a charged atmosphere.

Getting there: Fly to New York with Air Canada, Lufthansa, bmi and Continental.

Return fares from £565.

See: nycgo.com

BARCELONA, SPAIN What: Costume-clad locals get the fun started early by taking to the streets for drinking and dancing before the clock strikes midnight in the party city of Barcelona. Munch on tapas and knock back sparkling cava until dawn, then grab a breakfast of hot chocolate and churros on the beach before hitting your bed.

Getting there: Fly direct with easyJet. From £240 return.

See: spain.info

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62

Spend a night in the Isle of Wight and take a guided sightseeing tour of the island for £109 with Anderson Tours (020 7436 9304; andersontours. co.uk). Includes B&B, ferry crossing and luxury coach travel. Departs Dec 11.

Spend seven nights skiing in Mayrhofen, Austria, for £229 including flights with Crystal Ski ( 0871 231 2256; crystalski.co.uk). Includes B&B at the three-star Hotel Garni Postschlossl and airport transfers. Departs Dec 14.

Make the most Val Gardena’s early snowfall with four days skiing in the heart of the Italian Dolomites for £240 (valgardena.it). Includes accommodation at the Hotel Bellevue. Valid Dec 4-23.

Spend an unforgettable Christmas or New Year in Ireland. Paddywagon (0800 783 4191; paddywagontours.com) is offering a three-day tour of the Emerald Isle for £130, including accommodation, coach transport and entry fees.

Do your last-minute Christmas shopping in style at Bruges Christmas markets.

Topdeck (0845 257 5210; dontwastewinter.com) is offering a two-day break for £149 which includes accommodation and return coach fares from London.

Departures Dec 11-12.

DEAL OF THE WEEK Keep the festive spirit after Xmas by spending a day at Disneyland, Paris for £199.

From Dec 27 with Anderson Tours (0207 4369304; andersontours.co.uk).

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Visit Uganda on a 24-day African adventure for £349

DAILY TRAVEL DEALS GO TO tntmagazine.com/travel/latedeals where new travel deals are updated daily.

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A 24-day tour from Kampala, Uganda to Zanzibar, Tanzania with Absolute Africa (0208 742 0226; absoluteafrica.com), costs £349. Excludes Flights. Departs December 15 and 30. Quote TNT late deals.

Spend New Year in Marrakech with Fleewinter’s B&B deal which includes four nights from £265 pp (two sharing) Flights excluded.

(020 7112 0019; fleewinter.com).

Seven nights in the Canary Island’s Fuerteventura is £399 per person staying at the 3-star Lobos Bahia Club in Corralejo, all-inclusive. Departs Luton December 31 (0800 111627; lowcostholidays.com).

Flexiski are offering three nights at 4-star Hotel Banyan in St Anton, Austria, including flights and rail transfers at £410 pp. Departs Gatwick, Dec 16.

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Explore deserts, bazaars and the Dead Sea with Top Deck’s nine-day tour of Syria and Jordan (020 8987 3300; topdeck.travel). The tour costs £879. Flights excluded. Departs Jan 6. Twin/ triple-share in 3-star hotels, 1-night desert-cam.

Flight Centre are offering return airfare to Perth from £673 with Emirates. (0844 800 8628; flightcentre.co.uk) quoting reference: PERLONEK2. Valid between Apr 16 – Jun 30, offer ends Dec 15. Departs Gatwick.

Escape the January blues with a seven-night dive trip to Sharm El Sheikh. Included are flights from Gatwick with British Airways, accommodation on a B&B basis and 10 boat dives. Prices start from £809 per person. Valid from January 13 until February 19, (0845 5432 184; holidays4scubadiving.co.uk).

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Cool stuff: Cardiff at Christmas

TRAVEL 63

TNT Weekender Visit Wales Image Centre, Getty Images

Christmas in Wales Treat yourself to lashings of festive cheer by enjoying a Welsh Christmas with all the trimmings. With a slew of open-air ice rinks, Christmas markets, Santas’ grottos and cheery shopping experiences (phew!), Wales has plenty to offer anyone seeking a bit of Chrimbo va-va-voom.

VICTORIAN CHRISTMAS Rewind to Victorian times with a visit to Penrhyn Castle, Bangor, on December 11 and 12. Opulent rooms will be decked out in festive decorations and carol singing will echo

through the halls. Glug back some hot punch and munch on roasted chestnuts to get that cosy festive feeling. See: nationaltrust.org.uk.

ICY DOES IT Get your skates on at Cardiff’s open-air ice rink, part of its Winter Wonderland on City Hall Lawn, which also includes a big wheel and a cafe bar. The rink is open until January 3.

The seaside town of Swansea’s National Waterfront Museum will morph into the annual Waterfront Winterland with an open-air ice rink and traditional fairground rides, such as a big wheel and a carousel. It’s open until January 3 and there will be plenty of food stalls to refuelat.

See: cardiff.gov.uk; swanseachristmas.com.

STEP BACK IN TIME Shopaholics should get their credit cards poised and ready for action at the Caerphilly Medieval Fayre, rated one of the best Christmas markets in Wales by those in the know. Offering more than 22 stalls selling crafts and tasty tucker, the market will open on December 11 and 12 with an Visit the home of Welsh rugby to see where players like Tom Shanklin run out

entry fee of £3.30. If that’s not enough for you, there will also be a continental and farmers market bursting with potential Christmas presents and seasonal goodies.

See: caerphilly.gov.uk.

GET SPORTY Rugby fans can have a sticky beak behind the scenes of Cardiff’s Millennium Stadium during a dedicated Christmas tour. The national stadium of Wales is home to the Welsh rugby union and football teams, as well as playing host to a host of music concerts.

Check out the dressing rooms, walk down the players’ tunnel and sit in the president’s box.

The tour finishes up with hot drinks and mince pies. Tours are available every day from December 17-24 and at weekends throughout December, for £9.99.

See: millenniumstadium.com.

NEXT WEEK CHRISTMAS IN BELFAST

TNT online For a full travel guide on Wales go to tntmagazine.com/travel

NEW YEAR’S EVE: TOP 3 1. See the New Year in on ice skates at Cardiff’s City Hall Lawn, which offers midnight skating on its open-air ice rink.

See: cardiff.gov.uk.

2. Join in a torch parade in Llanwrtyd Wells, Britain’s smallest town in mid Wales, then watch a re-enactment of Mari Llwyd, an old Welsh tradition when people carry the Mari (horse skull on a long pole) from house to house, while reciting rhymes and songs until being invited in for food.

See: green-events.co.uk.

3. Celebrate New Year on January 13 with the residents of Gwaun Valley in west Wales, who mark the event according to the Julian calendar, not the Gregorian like the rest of us.

See: visitpembrokeshire.com.

WALES ENGLAND Swansea Cardiff

HOTSHOTS Hayley Madden TALKS TRAVEL PHOTOGRAPHY

WINNER ROCK SOLID BALLERINA, UTAH, USA Michael Baynes, Sunshine Coast, Australia This amazing image really shows off scale and size to the extreme. The tiny figure of the ballerina is crystal clear against the white cloud and she is dwarfed by the equally clean silhouette of the crooked tree, itself dwarfed by the gigantic hole in the rock formation. The streaks of cloud form diagonal lines to the strip of red light, which contrasts beautifully with the turquoise sky. There is a uplifting feeling to this image thanks to the great composition and the fantastic subject matter.

HOT TIP: A frame within a frame is a great compositional trick but beware of filling up the image with too much unnecessary black area. » Michael wins a three-day tour of Scotland for two valued at £198 from Haggis Adventures (0131 557 9393; haggisadventures.com)

RUNNER-UP SEVERN BRIDGE AT SUNSET, BRISTOL CHANNEL Dug Dalton, Campbells Creek, Australia Scale is also the theme of this image of the Severn Bridge with the arch of the far end of the bridge framed by the arch of the nearby end. The struts at the side make sweeping upward lines and the burntout sun is a dramatic counter balance to all this upward movement. The ‘H’s of the arches are slightly tilted and

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the fact that they are off centre creates a feeling of unsteadiness and adventure.

The flare effect gives the whole image a cinematic atmosphere.

HOT TIP: Use a vertical format to emphasise height and accentuate this with low horizons and vertical lines. » Dug wins a photography course voucher from Nigel Wilson Photography (020 7793 8664; photographycourses.org.uk) valued at £60

HOTSHOTS

HOLIDAY SNAPS

HOW TO MAKE YOUR PHOTOS STAND OUT

THEME: ZOOMING IN I Love You, Cologne, Germany by Cheryl Cheung, London

WHY THIS WORKS: 1 The heart is a natural focal point due to its distinctive shape, colour and sentimental message. It is comical because it is surrounded by quite run-of-the-mill locks.

2 A shallow depth of field has blurred background into attractive sparkly spots.

3 The locks fill the frame with interesting colours, shapes and patterns.

4 The angle of the shot enhances the shallow depth of field. It also enhances the lines, transforming them into sharp diagonals.

TRAVEL

Focusing in on a detail is a great way to make a photographic statement about an event or trip you have been on, and it can say more than an all-encompassing picture. Cheryl did just that by zooming on this heart-shaped lock on a stall in Cologne.

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HOT TIPS: 1 Portrait mode tends to give a shallow depth of field (background and foreground are blurry) while landscape mode gives a deep depth of field (front to back sharpness).

2 Getting close to your subject will make the depth of field shallower. So the closer you focus, the more the background and foreground will be out of focus. The further away you focus, the deeper the depth of field.

3 The greater the distance between the background and your subject, the more out of focus the background will be. The closer the background to your subject, the more in focus it will be.

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ROMANIA BITES BACK

Head to Dracula country to find more than haunted castles and vampires WORDS ZOE HARRIS

Transylvania ROMANIA

I

t was the legend of Dracula that first drew my attention to the forest-clad mountains and creepy castles of Transylvania, but I soon discovered that the region has much to offer beyond the sinister fairytale.

BITE ME My trip begins in Brasov, the gateway to Transylvania, a four-and-a-half hour train ride from Romanian capital Bucharest.

The name ‘Brasov’ stands in 9m high letters above the city, like a Saxon-styled Hollywood. It’s the most popular tourist

Bran Castle: watch out for the vampires

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SHORT BREAK NEED TO KNOW

destination in the region, thanks to its well-preserved architecture and proximity to Bran Castle.

One of the most popular attractions in Romania, the gothic Bran Castle, often billed as ‘Dracula’s Castle’, has never really had any real connections to the blood sucking count (see box below). However, the gothic castle’s turreted precipice would look foreboding on a stormy night.

The castle has a higgledy-piggledy maze of rooms more akin to a Cinderella’s fairytale palace than a vampire’s lair, but if you want to stock up on Dracula memorabilia, Bran is the place to buy vampire fridge magnets, mugs, T-shirts – and local liquor.

birthplace of Vlad the Impaler, otherwise known BEAR NECESSITIES as Count Dracula. Eat cake in Vlad III the Impaler Transylvania’s mountains the house where he was born, and forests are home to more now a restaurant, before soaking bears than anywhere in Europe, up the atmosphere as you walk the so we head to the Brasov suburb of city’s pretty cobbled streets.

Racadau at dusk to try to catch sight of the As I leave Romania I feel relieved to animals as part of a trip organised by the have spent kept the notorious vampires at Rolling Stone Hostel. We park adjacent to bay, and lucky to have discovered the a thick tangle of untamed forest and it’s fortress cities, amazing brown bears and a surprising to see people hanging out in traditional way of life still honoured by its groups eating snacks while waiting for warm and hospitable people. the bears to come. Surely the mix of hungry bears and a packet of crisps is not a sensible idea?

TRANSYLVANIA’S At about 9.30pm, a few brown bears DRACULA slope out of the forest and start to rake CONNECTION around the wheelie bins for food. It’s While Romanians amazing to see them so close.

Explore Brasov, Transylvania, Romania

TNT Images, Getty Images

FANGTASTIC TRANSYLVANIA

See a brown bear in the flesh

have myths about vampires, the association of Count Dracula with Vlad III the Impaler was just a figment of author Bram Stoker’s imagination in 1897.

The name Dracula comes from that of Vlad’s father, Vlad II Dracul, which means ‘dragon’ in Romanian. Born in Sighisoara, Vlad III (c.1431 –

76) was certainly a mighty force – he fought ruthlessly against the Turks and his method of execution was impaling people on a stake.

Spend a night at the impressive Hunters Castle in Turda where you can feast on ‘Impaled Tartar Steak’.

Alternatively, spend a bite-free night at the four-star House of Dracula Hotel near Brasov. See: huntercastle.ro; house-ofdracula.com.

TRAVEL

Picture perfect: hit the Carpathian Mountains

WHEN TO GO Any time. Romania is a year-round destination. Ski until March in Poiana Brasov.

GETTING THERE Wizz Air flies from London Luton to ClujNapoca in Transylvania.

Alternatively you can fly Wizz Air to Timisoara (to the West near ROMANIA Sighisoara Hungarian border) Brasov or easyJet to the Transylvania capital Bucharest BUCHAREST SNOW WONDER and take the train to The ski resort of Poiana the Transylvanian region.

Brasov, in the Carpathian GETTING AROUND Buses and trains are very cheap Mountains, is 12km from Brasov and compared to the UK. Though most are provided the dramatic backdrop for the pretty old and cumbersome, they at Hollywood flick Cold Moutain. Recently least run to timetable. See autogari.ro hailed the best value resort for budget for buses and infofer.ro for trains. skiing by Post Office Travel Money, the VISAS No visas required for Aussies, resort has a good snow record with cover Kiwis and Saffas. lasting until March. Slopes are gentle and CURRENCY Romanian New Lei. wide, and are suitable for beginners 1 GBP = 5 RON. and intermediates.

LANGUAGE Romanian.

OFF THE WALL GOING OUT A beer costs 4-6 RON. An hour-and-a-half bus ride ACCOMMODATION Basic cabins from Brasov is the medieval cost from 30 RON and hostel dorms cost 100 RON. walled city of Sighisoara, SEE romaniatourism.com. famous for being the

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TIPS Check out the East Side Gallery, Berlin

READERS’ TIPS PARIS FOR FREE

TRAVEL

Thinking of going TIP OF to Paris for a city THE WEEK break? Find a friend who’s under 26 and has an EU passport that would be willing to split entry fees to museums and attractions. They get in for free (or at a significantly reduced price) to lots of things, including the Louvre, Notre Dame, Arc De Triomphe the Catacombs and many more.

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Matt Dalton, via email

TRAINING DAYS

YOU ASKED FOR IT Laura Lindsay FROM LONELY PLANET My seven friends and I have booked a weekend away to Berlin in January.

As we are only there for a short time, what would you suggest are the city’s must-sees?

Jane, via email

Q

A

tntmagazine.com

A

Three to four weeks will give you plenty of time to experience a number of different parts of Colombia.

The coffee growing region is in the mountains of central Colombia and so isn’t too far out of the way of other areas you might want to visit.

There are a number of coffee farms across the region, so you should find something to suit you. The thermal springs at Termales de Santa Rosa and the forest of Valle de Cocora are both worth a visit.

Elsewhere, I would also spend some time in the fabulous city of Cartagena – the nearby Playa Blanca should provide the beaches you seek. Cartagena has a rich colonial history which has left an architecturally beautiful city.

If you head north to Parque Nacional Natural Tayrona you will discover a vast rainforest lined with gorgeous sandy beaches. Be wary of the currents, however, as a number of the beaches are not safe for swimming.

As always with newly emerging tourist destinations, you should be aware that risks remain, so check the Foreign Office’s website for the most up-to-date information (fco.gov.uk).

Tess Murray, via email Email your words of wisdom to traveltips@tntmagazine.com. Tip of the Week wins a Lonely Planet guide and other published tips win a fiver.

WIN

Lonely Planet’s Laura Lindsay will give you the benefit of her infinite wisdom if you email a question to traveltips@ tntmagazine. com. If she answers your question, you’ll win a Lonely Planet guide of your choice.

This is a reader forum — TNT and Lonely Planet accept no responsibility for any loss, injury or inconvenience sustained by anyone using the information provided.

Getty Images

I love Berlin – you are going to have an amazing time! There is so much to see that unfortunately you won’t have time to do it all, so you’re right to narrow it down to must-sees.

The Reichstag roof is free to visit and has some pretty great views of the city. While in that area you can visit the Brandenburg Gate and the Monument to the Murdered Jews of Europe. Potsdamer Platz is only a short walk from here if you want to experience modern Berlin’s architecture.

To understand the city’s history and geography a visit to the colourful East Side Gallery is a must – hop off the U Bahn at Warschauer Strasse.

In the evening I would head to Hackesche Hofe and the immediate area as there are some great bars and restaurants. Then head down Oranienburger Strasse to the Kunsthaus Tacheles, which is a fascinating place to pop in and have a beer or just wander around the gardens.

To get a real sense of the differences between east and west Berlin start in Karl Marx Allee and Alexanderplatz to discover Communist architecture and then take the U Bahn to visit Ku’Damm in the west.

We’re thinking of travelling to Colombia for three to four weeks and we want to know a good itinerary. We are keen to explore the coffee region, but also like beaches – any recommendations?

Nick, via email

Q

If you travel by train, pick up a Network Railcard from any major train station. It gives you and up to three friends you’re travelling with a third off most rail fares in south-east England (including Luton and Gatwick) as long as it’s not at peak times. It costs £25 for a year and you’ll get the cost of the card back even if you only use it a couple of times!

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TRAVEL NEWS NEW US FLIGHTS

Confess your sins before joining in the debauchery of Rio’s Carnival

TRAVEL

Budget Airline Iceland Express has added new routes to Chicago and Boston and will expand its New York flights, offering them on a daily basis.

See: icelandexpress.com.

NEW FRANCE GUIDE BOOK Bradt’s new travel guide Cross-Channel France takes a detailed look at the much overlooked coastal region of France, only an hour from Kent and including Calais, Dunkirk, Boulogne, Arras, St-Omer, Douai, Cambrai and Lille. The guide costs £13.99.

See: bradtguides.com.

AFRICA OVERLAND DISCOUNTS Tucan Travel is offering 25 per cent off their discontinued range of Africa overland tours.

Discounted tours include their 70-day Ultimate African Safari from Cape Town to Nairobi which was £2838 but is now priced £2128 and their 24-day Vic Falls & African Deserts, from Cape Town to Livingstone, which was £1095 and is now £821.

See: tucantravel.com.

See the Taj on the cheap

Thinkstock/ Getty Images

On The Go Tours are offering 25 per cent off their eight-day India Xmas tour, the Taj Traveller, which explores the famous Golden Triangle and allows visitors to sample the traditional Indian way of life in the village of Perharsar near Bharatpur. The tour costs £375 per person and departs December 25.

See: onthegotours.com.

71

OZ-BUS LEADS YOU TO RIO Overland specialists Oz-Bus have launched a new route in South America.

The journey will depart from Quito in Ecuador on December 1, 2011 before embarking on an 83-day trip, crossing 11,000km through South America, to Rio de Janeiro, arriving in time for the carnival celebrations on February 21, 2012.

The tour has room for about 30 travellers who will explore the heights of the Andes and the Inca Trail, the wilds of Patagonia and the contrasting cities of Lima, Santiago and Buenos Aires, before arriving in Rio de Janeiro.

The South American route will shun flights and aim to provide passengers as authentic a travel experience as possible.

Oz-Bus client experience manager Rob Freeman said that the South American adventure was a direct response to travellers’ demands. “South America constantly crops up when we speak to previous Oz-Bus clients about where they might like to go in the future,” he said.

“Many of our passengers rebook on different trips, so really we are just fulfilling their wishes, keeping them within the Oz-Bus family, and at the same time adding yet another thrilling adventure experience to our collection of trips.”

The South America trip costs £3499pp plus a local payment of US$1590. The price covers transport, all accommodation, breakfasts, guides and national park fees. See: oz-bus.com.

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ON THE ROAD

WORDS FRANKIE MULLIN

MOTHER CITY QUEER PROJECT

TRAVEL

Cape Town, South Africa Dec 18 A massive themed costume party – this year it’s all about Flower Power. It’s SA’s biggest gay event but if you’re up for a party then you’re welcome, whoever you fancy. And the bonus – it’s summer over there!

72

BURNING OF THE CLOCKS BRIGHTON, ENGLAND DEC 21 WHAT: Trust Brighton to

come up with something cool and anti-commercial just before Christmas. The costumed procession carrying flames and paper lanterns, often in spectacular shapes, is also incredibly beautiful.

WHERE: Making its way through Brighton and ending with a huge seafront bonfire.

WHY: Celebrating the winter solstice, or shortest day of the year, organisers aim to create

“new urban rituals to replace those traditional festivals that were lost in the dash to be new and non-superstitious.”

DO IT BECAUSE: It’s magical and will bring you good luck in the new year. And it’s fun!

HOW MUCH: Free to watch.

» burningtheclocks.co.uk

TNT online For more upcoming events, see our destination guides at tntmagazine.com/travel

» mcqp.co.za

ON THE ROAD WITH FRANKIE MULLIN

LOCK IT IN LILLE XMAS MARKET Lille, France Until Dec 30 lilletourism.com

CALI FAIR Cali, Colombia Dec 25-30 colombia.travel

SYDNEY HOBART YACHT RACE PROCESSION OF ST LAZARUS El Rincon, Cuba Dec 16 Hoping to exorcise evil spirits or get other saintly help, the faithful are required to make their way to the shrine in as difficult manner as possible.

Expect lots of bloody knees.

» cubatravel.cu

Where in the world?

Sydney, Australia Dec 26 rolexsydneyhobart.com

JUNKANOO Bahamas Dec 27 – Jan 1 bahamas.com

KAISERBALL Vienna, Austria 31 Dec austria.info

THE TRAVELLER …

Daniel Porter, 20, Adelaide, Australia What’s the craziest party you’ve been to?

SheBu Walkabout. Everyone just gets arse over tits.

Which country has the best-looking girls?

Italy, Switzerland and Amsterdam.

Your weirdest hostel experience?

In Istanbul there were drainpipes in the bedrooms and bugs crawling up the walls.

The best food you’ve eaten?

Simon Phinith from Cabramatta, Australia, at Geysir Stokkur, Iceland.

tntmagazine.com

Getty Images

WIN

Been somewhere good lately? Send us a horizontal photo of yourself with a copy of TNT from anywhere around the world and, if we print it, you’ll win a day trip for two to Bath and Stonehenge with Anderson Tours, valued at £90. » Email your pictures to ontheroad@tntmagazine.com along with your name, where you’re from and where the photo was taken, or see tntmagazine.com/world. Files must be at least 500Kb.

At a steakhouse in Knightsbridge. It was the best quality food I have ever eaten.

TOP FIVE

FIVE CITIES TO DRINK COFFEE JANINE KELSO GIVES A HIGH FIVE TO A CAFFEINE FIX SEATTLE, US WHAT: Seattle is a must-visit city for caffeine addicts, with coffee carts outside most buildings and at least one coffee shop on every street.

Many cafes have entertainment provided by poets and musicians. Seattle was the birthplace of Starbucks. You can still visit the mega chain’s first-ever coffee shop.

SEE: experiencewa.com

1

TRAVEL 73

ROME, ITALY WHAT: Sip a cappuccino or latte in the country where they were invented. Wake yourself up with an espresso at the popular Caffee S. Eustachio, on Eustachio Street. Also worth stopping at for a caffeine fix is Caffe Greco, one of the city’s oldest coffee shops.

SEE: italiantouristboard.co.uk

SANTIAGO DE CUBA, CUBA WHAT: Enjoy a Cuban coffee and a handrolled cigar in Santiago de Cuba, which is often referred to as the world’s coffee capital.

Learn more about the drink by visiting coffee plantations in the Pinar del Rio province.

SEE: cubaldn.com

2

3

BUENOS AIRES, ARGENTINA WHAT: Thanks to its Italian heritage, Buenos Aires has coffee shops galore. Popular styles include cafe con leche and lagrima, hot milk with a tiny drop of coffee. Enjoy a cup in Cafe Tortoni, the oldest coffee shop in Argentina.

SEE: whatargentina.com

4

MELBOURNE, AUSTRALIA WHAT: Caffeine is the drug of choice in Melbourne, Australia’s undisputed coffee capital. The city is loaded with myriad cafes, including Journal Canteen with its illuminated bookshelves, and Wall Two 80, which serves up mouth-watering flat whites.

SEE: visitmelbourne.com

Getty Images

5

THE INSIDER PETER KINDNESS, FOUNDER, MYFRIENDSHOTEL.COM The best part of my job is seeing my ideas come to life.

My most challenging travel experience is climbing Mt Rinjahni in Indonesia. It's a three-day trek up and down the 3726m active volcano.

My most memorable travel experience was being lost at sea for five hours off the

coast of Indonesia in sharkinfested waters.

The next trip on my travel wishlist is to go ski touring in Switzerland.

I always pack a portable table tennis net and some balls – you can use anything as a bat. It's a great way to meet local people and while away the time.

My guilty travel pleasure is buying fake goods. I can't resist a bargain.

tntmagazine.com

Blame IT ON

Rio

The east coast of Brazil, Rio gleaming like a dusty diamond in the middle, is sure to excite the senses and fire the imagination WORDS TOM STURROCK

Rio de Janeiro and the Costa Verde BRAZIL

T

he road winds steeply, ever-upwards, deeper and deeper into Tinjuca National Park. Below, Rio de Janeiro is still visible, its slums intertwined with ribbons of lush foliage; shacks scattered, like playing cards borne away on a gust of wind to precarious resting places.

Giant slabs of jet-black granite rupture the earth throughout the city centre, violent, storm-cloud monoliths soaring defiantly into the sky at alarming angles.

They are ever-present reminders of how this sprawling city was hewn roughly from the rainforests, from the hills themselves; reinforcements of natural order set hard against the man-made chaos foaming at their skirts.

At the summit, though, the mist is so thick it obscures everything, ushering

tntmagazine.com

COCONUTS ON THE BEACH A week earlier, I find myself in Trindade, a tiny fishing village about 100 miles around from Rio on Brazil’s Costa Verde.

Cobbled streets open out on to a spectacular beach, where the sands rise sharply into thick rainforest on all sides

of a small bay. Stray cats snooze in shady piles while dogs bullock headlong into the surf to retrieve hollowed-out coconut shells. It’s impossibly idyllic; impossibly, that is, anywhere apart from Brazil.

Up from the shoreline, a line of rusty shacks pockmark the dunes. The cafe strip. I catch a waiter’s eye – he’s barefoot and wearing only boardshorts, but is no less industrious. He introduces himself as Ivan and immediately exudes cartoonish, long-limbed, manic energy. His English is broken but I’m able to order a round of coconuts by pointing to a dog fetching a trophy from the shallows.

Ivan’s eyes light up. “Ah, coco,” he exclaims, clapping his hands twice above his head and scuttling into the dark recesses of his beachside kitchen so

AFP/Getty Images

Christ the Redeemer: the symbol of Rio de Janeiro

in a sense of oblivion and impenetrable whiteness. Paved steps lead to an observation deck and there, towering above, is Christ the Redeemer, the giant, 130ft-high statue of Jesus.

“The head is actually a little bit out of proportion,” our guide remarks, before gesturing to a small church tucked under one of Jesus’ sandalled feet. “That’s where you can go to confess your sins,” he says.

“It’s OK – we can pick you up tomorrow.”

AFP/Getty Images

TRAVEL 75

Rio’s hillside slums Idyllic: Ilha Grande

NEED TO KNOW WHEN TO GO There’s not really a bad time to go to Brazil but if you want stinking hot beach weather, head across in summer or late spring.

GETTING THERE Most airlines fly into Rio de Janeiro or Sao Paulo.

GETTING AROUND Taxis are the way to get around Rio de Janeiro – if you’re going further afield, the local coaches are reliable and the routes are surprisingly easy to figure out.

VISAS Nationals of the EU and New Zealand do not need tourist visas, but Aussies do.

CURRENCY Brazilian Real.

1 GBP = 2.75 BRL. LANGUAGE Portuguese.

GOING OUT You’ll find beers for 5 or 6 real.

ACCOMMODATION There are hostels for maybe 25 to 30 real per night.

Hotels are obviously more expensive, but outside Rio, prices drop.

SEE braziltravelinformation.com.

RIO DE JANEIRO

Trindade

tntmagazine.com

charted for Ilha Grande and, as the last bend is turned, with the colonial buildings of the island’s foreshore coming into view, a school of dolphins appears alongside our boat. There are six, maybe seven, of them, silver fins planing, breaching, not five metres starboard of us, a consort for the final leg of the journey. Then, as the dock nears, they peel off, pivot and are soon gone, vanishing without a trace in the half-light and the surf.

OUT TO SEA Off the coast of Ilha Grande, the sun is hidden behind a smear of cloud; the sky neon-white, the landscape jungle-green, the sea gun-metal grey. The island, accessible by ferry from Porto Angra, is a secluded paradise but today a wreath of fog clings like cigarette smoke to its hills.

There’s an old helicopter wreck out here. We’re going down to check it out.

Masks on, flippers on, breathing apparatus attached. Before we dive, our instructor offers one final note: “There are divers who pee in their wetsuits and there are those who lie.” And then it’s over the back of the boat, into the depths.

The bottom of the ocean is how one might imagine outer space – there’s no sound in these infinite, watery expanses; no gravity, no corners. The crashed helicopter comes into view, encrusted with barnacles and surrounded by shoals of tropical fish, shimmering like sequins in the brine. Off to one side, the reef; on the other side, the fish gush, ripple as one, massed together, thick and sleek like water from a Ilha Grande fire hydrant.

Back on deck, a course is

Ilha Grande is “ a secluded island paradise ” CRADLE OF SIN Late at night, the bars along Copacabana Beach hum with samba. I ask a taxi driver to take me somewhere busy. We pull up next to a stretch of beachside cafes; their yellow parasols bloom like concrete daisies, jutting up and out between lonely volleyball nets and spindly palms. I cross the square, where street vendors hawk their wares, and pick my way through the tightening mesh of scantily clad bodies.

Copacabana Beach

TNTimages, Thinkstock, AP Images, Getty Images

BRAZIL

quickly you can almost see the animated brushstrokes in his wake. He emerges with two armfuls of coconuts, straws rattling in holes punched in their tops.

Later, the coconuts drained of their strange milky-fruity goodness, it’s time to hit the road. All aboard the rickety bus, leaving Trindade behind, accompanied by the sense that this peculiar little enclave and its ragtag inhabitants might simply cease to exist once we depart.

BIG TRIP SELARÓN’S STAIRCASE

The women are beautiful, dolled up with deep tans and plenty of skin on show. The men, on the other hand, mostly tourists, are scruffy and wide-eyed. I’m deep into my second mojito before a wisp of conversation snakes its way across from one of the bar’s dark corners, where an American guy has his arm around a local girl. “One hour,” he says, holding up a finger and then reaching for his wallet, “200 real.”

The penny drops. She’s a working girl.

I look around. They’re all working girls.

All of them. Regrettably, it’s time to leave.

Stepping out into the warm Brazilian night, I sense I have dodged an embarrassing, albeit memorable, experience. Copacabana is now bathed in the ethereal yellow glow of streetlights, illuminating the thick haze that hangs like a halo around the whole scene. And there, on the hills in the distance, sitting sentry over the entire city and its central lagoon, is the unmistakeable silhouette of Christ the Redeemer. Arms outstretched.

Beseeching us all to repent.

It’s a big statue, no doubt. Just as well, too, because down here on the strip, down

here in the streets of Rio, there’s more than enough sin to go around. Indeed, this city seems built for it.

» Tom Sturrock went on the 17-day Rio to Buenos Aires Unplugged tour with Intrepid Travel (0203 147 7777; intrepidtravel.com), which costs from £1195 (excluding flights) and travels through Argentina, Uruguay and Brazil.

Price includes transport, accommodation in simple hotels and haciendas.

NEXT WEEK: ECO TRAVEL We share our top green getaways

Hold the pickle

TNTimages, Thinkstock, AP Images, Getty Images

WHAT IS CACHAÇA? If you spend any amount of time carousing in Brazil, you’re bound to come across cachaça, the favoured spirit of the locals. It’s fermented sugarcane and is seriously alcoholic – go easy, it packs quite a punch.

Cachaça is generally used as an ingredient in other cocktails, like a caipirinha, but can also be sipped neat or over ice. If you’re really

keen, you can do shots as well; on its own, it tastes like a sweetened tequila – it’s not to everyone’s tastes, but you may find yourself making an exception on cultural grounds.

Most restaurants will have a list of cachaças – aged, unaged and in a variety of different flavours.

Even if you’re on a tight budget, avoid the dirt-cheap cachaças – you’ll regret it the next morning.

Selarón at work

TNT online For a full travel guide on South America go to tntmagazine.com

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TRAVEL

The beaches are hard to find, harder to leave

One of Rio’s most iconic attractions is Selarón’s staircase, aka Escadaria Selarón. In 1990, Chilean artist Jorge Selarón began beautifying a dilapidated, drab stairway – there are 250 steps stretching 125m – between the neighbourhoods of Lapa and Santa Teresa.

Selarón used coloured tiles and small fragments of mirrors to brighten the stairs and the surrounding pavings.

Eventually, what began as a side project grew into an obsession, a labour of love that remains a work in progress more than 20 years later.

As Selarón’s masterpiece attracted more and more attention – U2 and Snoop Dogg have both filmed video clips featuring the staircase – people began mailing him tiles from around the world, which he incorporated into his colourful, chaotic mosaic to reflect the international appeal of his beloved Rio. If you visit at the right time of day, you can often find Selaron sitting on the steps, painting. Be warned – he’s an eccentric character, more than a little bit mad.

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Egypt’s Top Spots & The Red Sea PHARAOHS ADVENTURE - 6 days KING TUTANKHAMEN - 9 days EGYPT UNPLUGGED - 10 days DIVE DAHAB - 10 days KING RAMSES - 13 days 5-STAR JEWEL OF THE NILE - 10 days

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CROATIA SAILING SPEND 7 AMAZING NIGHTS SAILING IN CROATIA ON FANATICS AWESOME CHARTER BOATS ■ 7 Nights

TOURS

SKIFEST

4 JUN-17 SEP fr £409

SANTA XMAS PARTY SUN 12 DEC £5

■ ANNUAL XMAS PARTY

✔ Entry ✔ Santa hat ✔ Discount wristband ✔ £1.50 snakies till 7pm/£2 drinks after

THE ULTIMATE WHITE XMAS & NYE IN RISOUL & TIGNES, FRENCH ALPS! ■ PARIS XMAS COMBO ■ XMAS TIGNES FLIGHT ■ XMAS 6 DAY COACH ■ XMAS 9 DAY COACH ■ NYE 9 DAY COACH ■ NYE MAKE OWN WAY

24 DEC-3 JAN 19-26 DEC 23-28 DEC 19-27 DEC 26 DEC-3 JAN 26 DEC-2 JAN

£769 £699 £499 £569 fr£649 £569

AMAZING SKIFEST VALUE INCLUDING: ✔ Accomm on the snow at an incredible 1850m-2100m ✔ Lift pass & ski/board hire ✔ Funky Skifest merch ✔ Meals every day at the resort ✔ Stunning scenery ✔ Unforgettable Xmas & NYE celebrations ✔ Amazing ski & snowboard terrain up to 3000-3500m ✔ Legendary Skifest parties & nightlife

RUGBY LEAGUE DON’T MISS THE DRAGONS IN THE WORLD CLUB CHALLENGE! ■ St George v Wigan SUN 27 FEB £99 ✔ Return coach ✔ Saints supporter t-shirt ✔ Pre & after match parties ✔ 3 star hotel ✔ Incredible English RL atmosphere

FOOTBALL EXPERIENCE THE PASSION OF THE ENGLISH PREMIER LEAGUE!

ANZAC DAY JOIN OUR HIGHLY ACCLAIMED ANZAC TOURS GALLIPOLI TOURS All tours include Istanbul & the Gallipoli services, explore more of Turkey with our 9 & 16 Day tours ■ 3 DAY TOUR 24-26 APR £199 TNT ■ 4 DAY TOUR 23-26 APR £239 EARLY BIRD DISCOUNT ■ 5 DAY TOUR 22-26 APR £279 CALL FOR ■ 9 DAY TOUR 18-26 APR or 23 APR-1 MAY £399 £20 OFF! ■ 16 DAY TOUR 11-26 APR or 23 APR-8 MAY £599

EPL RETURN COACH DAY TOURS ■ Liverpool v Fulham @ Anfield SAT 18 DEC ■ Man City v Fulham @ Eastlands SAT 26 FEB ■ Man Utd v Fulham @ Old Trafford SAT 9 APR FULHAM FC HOME MATCHES ■ Fulham v Sunderland 3pm SAT 11 DEC ■ Fulham v West Brom 8pm TUE 4 JAN

£99 £99 £99 £32 £29

SKI WEEKS SKI-FEB

18-26 FEB

ALL-INCLUSIVE

£649

WESTERN FRONT TOUR

SKI BUNNY

8-16 APR

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£629

WWI French & Belgian battlefields + Anzac Day services EUROSTAR TOUR 23-25 APR £279 (or Make Own Way £219 ) ✔ Somme ✔ Villers-Bretonneaux ✔ Ypres ✔ Fromelles ✔ Dep London Easter Sat, Ret Easter Mon ✔ Two Nights Hotel

✔ Return coach from London to the Alps ✔ Apartments with balcony, kitchen & ensuite bathroom ✔ 6 Day lift pass ✔ Ski / Snowboard hire ✔ Breakfast & dinner daily ✔ Optional extra lessons ✔ Funky tour t-shirt, headband & lip balm ✔ Nightly parties, theme nights & apres ski

TNT D BIR EARLY UNT DISCO FOR CALL 0 OFF!

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AMAZING RANGE OF TOP QUALITY TOURS ■ Camping 4 Days

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£159 £329 £349 £239 £269

■ ST PADDY’S DAY, DUBLIN 16-18 MAR ■ PALIO SIENA 15-18 AUG ■ GREEK ISLANDS 9 Days OR 11 Days ■ LA TOMATINA Hotel, Hostel or Camping ■ OKTOBERFEST Hotel, Hostel or Camping

£129 £149 £399-£489 fr £139 fr£99

BOOK ONLINE NOW! www.thefanatics.com or call 0207 240 3223 COVENT GARDEN OFFICE 1st

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Floor, 15 New Row, Covent Garden, WC2N 4LD Mon-Fri 9am-6.30pm

ON THE GO ASSURANCE BOOK WITH CONFIDENCE - ABTA, ATOL AND AITO BONDED - INVALUABLE!

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ANZAC 2011SPECIALISTS WITH THE

• We use quality 4 star western standard hotels.

£249 £299

See more of Turkey!

ANZAC UNCOVERED - 6 days ANZAC COO-EE - 8 days ANZAC BONZER - 11 days ANZAC COBBER - 14 days

• We’re Aussies and Kiwi’s – we care about ANZAC! With offices in London, you can drop in to see our friendly staff who have been to ANZAC day themselves.

• We are ABTA, ATOL & AITO bonded, meaning our quality is guaranteed and your money is 100% protected.

Short & Sweet PURE ANZAC - 4 days ANZAC DIGGER - 5 days

Why ON THE GO for ANZAC Day?

£399 £449 £599 £699

Combine ANZAC with Egypt GALLIPOLI & GIZA - 12 days £599 ANZAC & ANCIENT EGYPT - 16 days £749

• We have the best guides – handpicked by us and contracted a year in advance.

• Many of our tours include our exclusive, waterside ANZAC BBQ – offering you a good feed and chilled beer to take you into the night prior to the ANZAC day service.

• We offer an excellent choice of tours from 4-14 days to suit all budgets. PLUS you can combine Egypt with ANZAC and see it all in one hit – great value!

• With a variety of tour start dates you don’t need to pay top dollar for your flights. Our well-timed tours make the most of weekends and public holidays.

• Complimentary airport arrival transfers from any Istanbul airport on each and every tour.

• No mandatory single supplements or local payments on any of our ANZAC tours.

• We offer unbeatable ON THE GO quality throughout – we always deliver what we promise!

As a testament to our quality of tours check out onthegotours.com, find us on facebook.com/onthegotours or follow us on twitter.com/On_The_Go_Tours and read what our previous ANZAC travellers have to say. Here’s one for starters...

In recognition of the effort the Commonwealth War Graves Commission undertakes at Gallipoli and other memorial sites ON THE GO are proud to make a donation to this organisation on your behalf for every ANZAC package booked – see www.cwgc.org

“YoBIG THANKS TO ALL ON THE GO

STAFF! u guys rock, I have never experienced such a well organised and fun tou just back from. I ha r as the Gallipoli tour I am ve but you guys are by been on quite a few tours far ever experienced. Ke the most organised I have ep recommending you up the good work. I will be to all my mates. Ch eers!”

Be n Symons, May 20

CALL OR GO ONLINE FOR OUR BROCHURE ABTA, AITO AND ATOL PROTECTED

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ONTHEGOTOURS.COM

AFRICA CHINA EGYPT INDIA RUSSIA SOUTH AMERICA JORDAN HIMALAYAS MOROCCO CROATIA TURKEY SRI LANKA ANTARCTICA

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ON THE GO ADVISORS AVAILABLE 9AM - 9PM

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TOURS

ON THE GO have over 12 years experience of operating ANZAC day tours. We know how important this day is to you and each year our teams from the UK and Australia attend this event ensuring our tours run smoothly.

89

TRAVEL TOURS

90

Award-winning adventure travel...

ue Quality, value & security....

Europe

East & Southern Africa

From 7 to 93 days, we have over 20 tours through Eastern Europe.

From 9 to 64 days, we have over 30 tours through East & Southern Africa.

Jewels of Croatia £610

Zanzibar to Vic Falls £650

8 Days - Explore the cultural and natural highlights of Croatia’s cities and islands on this spectacular European adventure.

14 days - Relax on the beautiful Spice Island of Zanzibar before heading overland to the mighty Victoria Falls.

Middle East & North Africa

Latin America

• • • • • • • •

From 7 to 37 days, we have over 13 tours through the Middle East & North Africa.

From 7 to 171 days, we have over 107 tours through Latin America.

Morocco Explored £440

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8 days - Discover the magic of Morocco’s minarets and medinas on this amazing North African adventure.

15 days - Includes trekking the Inca Trail to Machu Picchu, Nazca Lines, Colca Canyon, Pisco, Arequipa, Cuzco and internal flights.

Independently owned and operated for 24 years Fully escorted by passionate tour leaders Custom-built vehicles for overland tours Many entrance fees included Major sites included No single supplements No peak season supplements Your tour is AITO protected

Special Discounts Combine any three of our everyday discounts to receive up to 15% OFF any of our group tours!*

Asia & Russia From 7 to 48 days, we have over 39 tours through Asia.

Taj Mahal & Tigers £460 11 days - Let your senses be tantlised, your emotions tested and your spirit lifted as you embrace India.

*Terms & conditions apply. See website for details.

Prices are land only and do not include international flights.

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ON THE GO ASSURANCE

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TRAVEL

AFRICA WILDLIFE, SCENERY, CULTURE & ADRENALINE

£425 £519 £689 £715

KILIMANJARO - 8 days £935 BIG FIVE EXPLORER - 36 days £1349 KENYA TO CAPE - 43 days £1399 GREAT AFRICAN EXPEDITION - 57 days £1939

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MOROCCO MOUNTAINS, DESERTS, COAST & SOUKS!

TREK THE ATLAS - 6 days MARRAKECH & BEYOND - 9 days CAMELS, SOUKS & KASBAHS - 15 days MARRAKECH, SAHARA & SURF - 11 days

JORDAN DEAD SEA, PETRA, WADI RUM, RED SEA! Why ON THE GO are number #1 for Group Tours • • • •

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PASSAGE TO PETRA - 6 days TOTALLY JORDAN - 8 days ROAD TO JORDAN - 16 days ARABIAN HIGHWAY - 11 days

£549 £749 £979 £1219

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The tour has been ve ry well organised an d I feel like I have seen a core of Jordan without being rushed.

I very much enjoyed Petra on the 3rd da y, when I had the opportunity to explore the site from many different angles and have the time to absorb it!

Tom May

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AFRICA CHINA EGYPT INDIA RUSSIA SOUTH AMERICA JORDAN HIMALAYAS MOROCCO CROATIA TURKEY SRI LANKA ANTARCTICA

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ON THE GO TOURS, 68 NORTH END ROAD, WEST KENSINGTON, LONDON W14 9EP

ON THE GO ADVISORS AVAILABLE 9AM - 9PM

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GORILLAS IN THE MIST - 6 days ELEPHANTS & FALLS - 9 days GORILLA & GAME TREK - 15 days WILDLIFE EXPRESS - 22 days

91

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LLING: E S W O N S R U O T 2011 lona - July 3-10 ril 9 • Grand National - Ap ay Holid nk Ba m rda ste Am • -25 tours - Easter April 21 urs To y Da t co As l ya Ro • 16-18 (inc Ladies Day) June

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ON THE GO ASSURANCE

DON’T BE FOOLED - CHECK FOR LOCAL PAYMENTS!

Many companies don’t show compulsory local payments they collect on top of entrance fees and tipping. Be sure to add this in when comparing prices.

TRAVEL

RUSSIA

93 TOURS

GO BEHIND THE IRON CURTAIN AND DISCOVER PUKKA RUSSIA SIMPLY ST. PETE’S - 4 days MOOD FOR MOSCOW - 4 days VODKA SHOT - 6 days

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£339 £389 £499

BACK IN THE USSR - 7 days £549 RUSSIAN REVOLUTION - 9 days £749 ROUTE OF THE ROMANOVS - 10 days £1179

£799 THE LEGENDARY £1149 £1349 £1899

TRANS-SIBERIAN RAILWAY

PURE ANZAC - 4 days AEGEAN EXPLORER - 7 days TURKEY UNPLUGGED - 10 days ANZAC BONZER - 11 days Why ON THE GO are number #1 for Group Tours • • • • •

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TURKEY

£249 £399 £499 £599

& ANZAC DAY 2011

“ KATYA WAS A GREA

T GUID ... knowledgeable, frien dly, efficient and org E anised.

Thank you for makin g my 30th birthday one to remember! I enjoyed every minute in Russi a!

Would highly recom mend this tour...

– thanks On The Go .”

Chris Thomson

CALL OR GO ONLINE FOR OUR BROCHURE ABTA, AITO AND ATOL PROTECTED

ONTHEGOTOURS.COM

AFRICA CHINA EGYPT INDIA RUSSIA SOUTH AMERICA JORDAN HIMALAYAS MOROCCO CROATIA TURKEY SRI LANKA ANTARCTICA

020 7371 1113

ON THE GO TOURS, 68 NORTH END ROAD, WEST KENSINGTON, LONDON W14 9EP

ON THE GO ADVISORS AVAILABLE 9AM - 9PM

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TRAVEL

www. absoluteafrica.com call + 44 208 742 0226 G

email: absaf@absoluteafrica.com

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Sunday, December 26|Bison & Bird|10am - late Ô FREE ENTRY! Ô Live music at 5pm and

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Most of the people I know silly enough to join me on something like this are back on the other side of the world.

Anthony Tan. See: tntmagazine.com/forums

Cool Irish chick here: (aged

114

42 years old), seeking a longterm relationship with a caring, sensitive, Aussie/ Kiwi (Aboriginals and Maoris more than welcome), aged 38-44 years old. I am a caring, sensitive, generous soul with a beautiful smile. I am a Catholic. I love kids. So if you would like to know more, then feel free to email me on: siobhankav@hotmail. co.uk and I’m sure you won’t be disappointed. Love, Siobhan Longest walk of shame:

To Juddy, Laterrrrs BUUUUUUTCH!!! from everyone in W3 The dog days are really over:

Woof! The time has come for all the dogs to find their way home. Half of Acton knows where the key’s kept, but the pile of crap out the front keeps us safe. We will miss our one-way trips to Jager island, kitchen parties, our Monday morning “sickies”, being sent out to the ‘kennel’ for all our dirty dog deeds, everyone partaking in our incestuous hook-ups and the endless fun which will be permanent memories. Wilky Way, we love you!

Teach us tennis: To the two hot Australian tennis coach flatmates we met at Elk bar on Saturday night. We are the two blonde flatmates you met… we have come to the conclusion that you must have been mugged of your phones on the way home, seeing as you never called to organise the double date on Monday.

It’s ok, you can contact us on teachustennis@gmail.com so you can help us work on our

tntmagazine.com

Smoking hot Redback girl:

post your message at tntmagazine.com/seeking or email seeking@tntmagazine.com

backhand for those doubles tennis games.

Looking for Ronan: I met you at the church a few weeks ago, you told me that my eyes shone like a diamonds and that I would be queen of your land… how about I let you be king of my bedroom ;-) get in touch soon … diana xxx Email me on diamonds-areforever@live.com.au Kiwi Louise: I met at Clapham Common Tube station on Thursday the Dec 2 at 11.30pm. You got on the northbound train instead of southbound to Balham and I pissed myself at you but I didn’t get your number …schoolboy error. I was making fun of your accent :) Tucker.

See tntmagazine.com/forums Seeking new “friends”: Right, our W3 Wasters/Creeps/Lawn Mowers crew is diminishing rapidly. Boys are heading back to NZ or to Austria or to start meaningful relationships with Aussie girls. So myself, Shayd, JP Stephenson and the W3 are throwing out a invite to all aspiring wasters/creeps/lawn mowers or toe steppers to get involved in mammoth crackon sessions in tropical Acton

… preferably hot girls who can find remotes for Samoans … get ahold of our inspirational leader Tim at timothyryan05@ gmail.com Seeking Kiwi Alan from Soprano’s Bar Sat Nov 20:

We danced, we sang, we connected … it was great :) I gave you my number so we could do it again....

Call me? Kelly xx Wanting people for jam sessions: Aussie girl living

in Acton who sings and is learning to play Djembe drum - looking for someone in the area to play guitar, or any other instrument, for jam sessions. Tilly. See: tntmagazine.com/forums A spot of hiking in July?: Okay, a ‘spot of hiking’ might be a bit of an understatement. I’m actually referring to the Oxfam Trailwalker thing (oxfam.org. uk/trailwalker) but yes, have just relocated across here from AU and in the entire ‘what the heck’ spirit that got me over, thought I might try put together a team. At this stage, it’s purely speculative as there are some other requirements (i.e. fundraising and, well, training) but thought I’d ask.

Desperately Seeking is a reader forum, and all messages should be within the spirit of the page; TNT cannot take responsibility for offence caused. No phone numbers can be printed. Messages may be edited for publication. See tntmagazine.com/seeking

Where have you gone? I think your name is Chloe and you are from South Africa. I used to always come into the Redback and try and talk to you. I made you smile but went in there last week and you were gone. I made you laugh once, I think at the cocktail bar where you make those green teapots. I am the guy from New Zealand that always looks at you with the tattoos you liked. Would be agood to catch up for a drink??

Adam. See: tntmagazine.com/ forums Cam and Laura: Cheers for all the good times in London. Will miss the wasted days, headbanging nights and all-round good energy you two brought to the city. Good luck in Wellington and remember to look after each other. Racton.

Is anyone else going to be alone in London on Christmas? I’d love to meet

up with fellow travellers! I’m a 29 y/o female heading to London for the first time.

I’ll be there from the 25 -28 … then off to Paris! Phillygirlie.

See: tntmagazine.com/forums Exciting girlfriends wanted :

Thirty-something lady wants to meet staight women for socialising, shopping and being a friend. I am wacky, outgoing and enjoy keeping fit.

I am from North London.

Hope to hear from you funloving girls soon. Jade. See: tntmagazine.com/forums

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