Deep-London May 2011 by angela ferrara

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May 2011 Issue Eighty Nine

deep online at: www.deep-london.co.uk • www.issuu.com • facebook deep-london • twitter @deep_london Hello there.. ...and welcome to issue 89. Firstly this month, a correction from the last issue: In 1976 I was 4, not 6. That is all. Anyhoo, hello again all, we hope you all enjoyed the plethora of delights and, mainly, time off that April afforded. I don’t know about you but I could do with some time off to get over all the time off. Sadly though, there’s only one official Monday skive left between now and August, at the end of May, but I’m sure we’ll all do our very best to try to soldier through and enjoy ourselves... Talking of holidays, this month the Deep-Massive have mostly been AWAY, here there and everywhere, and specifically in Brighton, as you’ll see from Groove Hoob’s photo story later in the mag. I did ask him to write a bit too, but he found it a bit tricky mainly because he’s an inanimate stuffed toy, so I’ll have to do this bit myself: Basically, if you’re going down to stay in Brighton for any reason, you could do a lot worse than book yourself into the hotel we found, Kempfield House. Great location almost directly opposite the pier, great value rooms with fantastic full English brekkies included, friendly staff, a four poster bed and a nice welcome touch of a couple of half bottles of wine, some mints, nuts and free soft drinks in the minibar, oh, and a cracking Italian restaurant over the road. Result! I know that sounds like an advertisement but, it’s not, we were just really quite impressed. If we could’ve worked out how to use the strangely complex shower array we’d have been even more impressed but hey-ho! Actually it was a fab weekend all round - who knew the pubs on the pier would be open at 10am on Royal Wedding Day? Well, we didn’t, but we found out at about 5 past... Anyway, as usual we have the usual mixture of rubbish for you to enjoy this month, and happily we’re a tad less ‘Woman’s Own’ this month with some actual music and stuff, hurrah! Also as usual I’m absoultely shattered, it’s very late and I want to go to bed, so that’s about it from me this month. The mag will be back to usual size next month, when there will be even more rubbish to enjoy, although, in fact, I’ve just remembered, next month is our 8th Birthday... I’m not even going to moot a party as we never have the time to organise anything, although having said that, we might surprise ourselves... Right, that’s it, I’m off for a kip. Enjoy the lovely weather as long as it continues, and we’ll see you next month. Pip-pip, avanti, allons-y and CHEERS! Angela xxx Your Bonsai-Editor

Contact Us: editor: angela ferrara tel: 07910 506197 e: angela@deep-london.co.uk staff and contributors: auntie may, petal dunwoody, advertising sales: call angela on 07910 506197 or e-mail angela@deep-london.co.uk publishing & design: deep-london web hosting: europahost, 94 southbridge road, south croydon, CR0 1AF, tel: 0845 644 1484. www.europahost.net Happy Birthday: Joanne, Esther, Scott, Justin, Tabitha, Gavin, Alison, Anna, Jade, Nicole, Jo, Adrian, Karen, David, Aimee. Congratulations: Brighton & Hove Albion for going up, Dougie Freedman & Crystal Palace FC for staying up! R.I.P: Elisabeth Sladen, John Sullivan, Poly Styrene, ‘Sadler’s Wells’, the Typewriter, Croydon Clocktower, David Lean Cinema etc. Ted Lowe, Sir ‘Enry Cooper, Claude Choules, Jackie Cooper.

GET YOUR EVENT LISTED: e-mail: HELLO@ DEEP-LONDON.CO.UK what’s on listings are absolutely FREE!

Last date for inclusion in June issue -

20th May 2011 1

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CHALKBOARDS & WINDOW ARTWORK FOR PUBS, BARS, CAFES & RESTAURANTS. LOGOS & CARTOONS

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MAY 2011 THIS MONTH’S FEATURES:

Stand! At Fairfield with Snowboy

Croydon’s Finest Keith & Candice Marie

May Fayre!

FREE ASPARAGUS GIVEAWAY VOUCHER! 8

Auntie May

Groove & Friends in Brighton

In The Shed

Month in Pix

14 8

LISTINGS: What’s On Guide

38 3

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A new music night launches this month in the surprising setting of the Fairfield Halls. First up for your edification and delight - Snowboy...

s one door closes, so another opens, and as the Clocktower shuts (don’t get me started) so, somewhat surprisingly, the Fairfield opens to an exciting new monthly music night - Stand! - in the Arnhem Gallery - with one fell swoop filling the mid-sized venue gap left by the Braithwaite Hall (seriously, don’t get me started) while also taking some major steps toward shedding its, let’s be honest here, slightly fusty image. More power to their elbow, we reckon! Stand! is a collaboration between One Tree Music promoter Graeme Miall, a familiar name to anyone who appreciates music in Croydon, and the venue, and is a genuine new direction for it, something that Simon Thomsett, the CEO of Fairfield, acknowledges; “The Fairfield Halls has a long and proud tradition of hosting some of the best of contemporary music, from its opening in 1962 right through to the modern era. However, the concert hall, which seats over 1500 people, isn’t always the right environment for acts that benefit from a less formal presentation. “We’re lucky in having one of the largest flat floor spaces in South London in the Arnhem Gallery and it’s the ideal space to create a new standing hall for new music from both new and established artists. “Stand! is made for audiences who just want to come and hear excellent new music in a relaxed

bar atmosphere “We chose to work with One Tree Music because Graeme has an infectious enthusiasm and knowledge of the contemporary music scene and an energetic and crusading zeal to bring the best of what’s out there to Croydon. We like him because he likes music; it’s a great starting point!” That enthusiasm, of which anyone who managed to catch a band at The Oval Tavern over the last seven years will no doubt be

McAlmont. But we’re getting ahead of ourselves - the launch night on the 19th May is what we should be looking at, and here is where Snowboy comes in... For anyone who doesn’t know, and I have to admit, somewhat ashamedly, that I was one of them, Snowboy (aka Mark Cotgrove) is a UK-based Afro Cuban percussionist, bandleader, DJ, music critic and journalist, and is mooted as the ‘UK’s Ambassador of Afro-Cuban funk’.

"The full range and history of most of the Latin-Jazz movements since about 1943 are incorporated in this music. This is certainly for you" THE BEAT aware, is echoed by Graeme himself; “The Fairfield has a long reputation of staging landmark concerts and the plans to deliver great gigs in the Arnhem really adds to the complex as a whole. “This size of space is thin on the ground for the South London music scene and is going to give artists a great new mid-size venue to come and play. “It’s very exciting to be working with the Fairfield Halls as they broaden their music offering, and we’re already getting an amazing response form acts looking to perform here.” So far, so promising then, but Stand! will, er, stand or fall on the quality of the acts. Happily, it looks pretty good to us, with future nights booked for, amongst others, Croydon’s very own David 4

He’s been one of the main cornerstones for the British and European Latin Jazz scene for over 15 years with his powerful band, The Latin Section, comprised of a 'Dream Team' of the finest Jazz and Latin musicians based in the U.K. As a non-Latin American Englishman, it’s a surprise that percussionist Snowboy appears in the book ‘The Who’s Who Of Latin Music’. His band has recently been described as "one of the top Latin Jazz acts in the World, alongside Eddie Palmieri and Bobby Sanabria" by leading expert in Afro Latin Music, Professor Robert Farris-Thompson of Yale University. Snowboy has released 15 albums and 20 singles in the last twenty years and has performed all over the world from Greece to

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Australia, Hong Kong to Ireland, Singapore to Scandinavia, the U.S.A., Japan, Canada, Turkey, all over Europe and many more countries besides, with his own band and with artists such as Lisa Stansfield, Mark Ronson, The James Taylor Quartet, Basia, Airto, Moreira and Jon Lucien. His heavy schedule as a session musician has taken him to play on

Brazilian / Cuban percussion expert Robin Jones, and, after teaming up with many musicians, he established himself as a band leader and in-demand session musician. According to his biography, “Unlike many of today's overly polished and/or bland Latin Jazz recordings, Snowboys' albums comprise of non-stop

"It’s very exciting to be working with the Fairfield Halls and we’re already getting an amazing response from acts looking to perform here" Graeme Miall, One Tree Music Johnny Carson, Arsenio Hall and David Letterman's T.V. shows amongst many others with the above artists. With these and his own band he has also played a lot of the world's top festivals. As a prolific DJ on the U.K.'s Jazz Dance scene since the late 1970's, in early 1983, Snowboy went on to take lessons from top

Afro-Cuban Jams and catchy Mambos reminiscent of the early works of Eddie and Charlie Palmieri and Tito Puente and show a firm understanding of the Latin Jazz forefathers. His music has been described as fiery, hard driving, up tempo, authentic Afro Cuban Jazz”, which, if we’re anywhere near the mark, means

that if you like a bit of latinedged jazz and funk, which we do, and you like a bit of a furious dance about, which we sort of do, and if you want to support new music ventures in Croydon and thus ensure that new and exciting things continue to happen around here, which we always do, you really, really should get yourself along to the Arnhem Gallery on the 19th May, which we most definitely are, so we’ll see you at the bar, si? Stand! Launch event featuring Snowboy & the Latin Section plus support Fowokan featuring two members of of the legendary Cymande playing funky roots reggae. Tickets £15, Doors 7pm. Arnhem Gallery, Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon www.standatfairfield.co.uk www.fairfield.co.uk www.onetreemusic.co.uk

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The return of our occasional strand shining a light on some of the people we’ve put on t-shirts as being Croydon’s finest. This month: Keith & Candice Marie Pratt...

hy Keith and Candice Marie Pratt now, I hear you ask? Well, because Keith and Candice Marie Pratt are from ‘Nuts In May’. See what we did there? Mike Leigh’s Nuts in May was first screened on TV in 1976 as part of the BBC’s Play for Today series. It’s extraordinary to think that the next play he produced for the BBC, Abigail’s Party (I advise do not watch this play whilst tinkering with psychedelic drugs), attracted 17 million viewers to BBC2. There was a strike on ITV at the time but there might just be a correlation between adventurous programming and people actually watching the BBC. Anyway, the point about Candice Marie and Keith, the central characters of Nuts in May, is that they come from Croydon and are therefore both inducted into the magnificent hall of fame that is Croydon’s Finest. Keith (Roger Sloman) is a Social Worker who is apparently still living tent-bound in some folk festival c1968, which is where he left most of his hair. He is a tall, gangling chap who wears sandals and socks, is very much into his nature, maps and banjo. He tries to act as though he is a free thinking, right on kind of fellow but in reality is one of the straightest, most repressed people you could ever wish to meet. Candice Marie, played by Leigh’s then wife Alison Steadman, is a completely genuine hippy. Long blond hair and floral dresses, flower fancying, stone polishing, fey in the extreme, apparently permanently dreaming. She plays the guitar accompanied by Keith and his banjo and sings in a rather unpalatable reedy voice. The play sees Keith and Candice Marie going camping to Dorset in their Morris Minor. The trip is well planned with an itinerary of interesting things to see and do and the chance to sing a few songs around the camp fire. As the days go on we realise despite his right on pretence Keith is a snob and completely unable to deal with other people. Whilst Candice Marie pops in and out the tent like a little rabbit making friends, Keith gradually reaches boiling point either with the pair of 6

goers making too much noise or the Welsh student who Candice Marie befriends and gives Keith the jealous hump. Keith is a monster, and monstrous because there is a little piece of him in anyone that lives in the suburbs. Candice Marie almost isn’t there at all, a shadowy character devoted (miraculously) to Keith. Except for the student, himself an aspiring middle class person, the other characters are annoying or vacant. Keith would be an untold pain to spend time with anywhere but I sort of admire his willingness to stick up for himself. The irony is that they have gone away to enjoy some freedom from routine but they perish for the lack of it. Candice Marie and Keith are no worse or better than other archetypes of the late 70’s. Keith is a monster but is he any more so than Howard Kirk in the History Man? Candice Marie is a

much more sympathetic character than Steadman’s later role in Abigail’s Party. The whole lot of them were flawed hence we find ourselves here and now. Keith and Candice Marie clearly do get on despite their absurdity and do have charm.. I never thought I’d say this but what is wrong with playing guitar and banjo in a field having a bit of a singsong and wanting a bit of peace and quiet..? If you haven’t seen Nuts In May we’d strongly advise that you do - it’s very funny and is now something of cult viewing - but we’d also strongly advise you have a pillow handy to bite / hide behind as the cringe-making events unfold before your eyes. Keith and Candice Marie, we, and Croydon, salute you, as long as we’re allowed to do so within the guidelines of the Country Code... Petal Dunwoody

Candice Marie: “What are you reading Keith?” Keith: “The Guinness Book of Records.”

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he marvellous and mildly bonkers people who decide such things as when it’s British Sandwich Week have, it seems, gone a bit nuts in May and thus there are a plethora of different foodstuffs being officially celebrated this month (and yes, British Sandwich Week is one of them (1621st May), and no, we’re not making any of this stuff up) so in a highly topical food section we’ve decided to try and cram as many of them in as possible...

National Honey Week / National Herb Week / National BBQ Week: 4-10th May / 6-12th May / 30th May-5th June respectively. It may be cheating, but if we do all these separately we’ll be here all day, so here’s killing three birds with one extremely tasty stone with BBQ Herb and Honey Pork Loin. This great pork loin roast is marinated in beer and honey, making it tender and flavoursome. Remember to use pork loin and not pork tenderloin. It will save you a lot of money. Also, pork loin has more fat so it will stay moist.

National Asparagus Month: 1-31st May. Yes, ‘tis true, so celebrate this most British of veggies (and aphrodisiac) with a simple Asparagus in Wine recipe, proving that luxurious food need not be complicated...

Prep Time: 12 minutes Marinade Time: As long as possible, at least 1-2 hours Cook Time: 1 hour, 30 minutes Serves 4 to 6

You will need: 2 pounds asparagus, thick ends removed 1/4 cup butter 1/4 cup white wine 1/2 teaspoon salt 1/4 teaspoon black pepper

You will need: • One 2 and a 1/2 to 3 pound pork loin roast • Can of beer of your choice • 1/2 cup honey • 1/3 cup Dijon mustard • 1/4 cup chopped onion • 1/4 cup olive oil • 3 cloves garlic, minced • 2 teaspoon dried rosemary leaves / 2 sprigs or so fresh • 1 and a half teaspoon salt • 1/2 teaspoon black pepper

Method: 1. Bring a large pot of water to the boil. Add asparagus and cook until just bright green, 2 to 4 minutes. Remove from water, rinse under cold water, and drain. 2. Melt butter in a large pan over medium heat. Add wine, salt and pepper, and stir until mixed. Stir in the asparagus, cook until thickened and serve immediately.

Method: 1. Place meat in a large sealable plastic bag. 2. Combine remaining ingredients and pour over pork. 3. Seal bag and allow to marinate in refrigerator for 1-2 hours. 4. Preheat grill to medium heat. 5. Remove pork from bag and place on rotisserie over drip pan, or you can just turn the roast regularly (at the same time as basting - see (8) below). 6. Reserve marinade - while pork is cooking, simmer marinade for 5-7 minutes. 8. Remove marinade from heat and baste roast with it every 20 minutes until cooked through. 9. Roast should cook for 1 1/2 hours or so. Also for National BBQ week, Grilled Sardines, which are, in the Deep Massive’s humble opinion, the tastiest things EVER on a BBQ. You will need: • 6-8 medium sized fresh sardines • Sea Salt • Lemon Method: 1. Scale and gut the sardines (you can have your fishmonger do this). 2. Wash the sardines under cold, running water and pat dry with paper towels. Lightly salt the sardines with coarse sea salt. 3. Pop your sardines on the barbie. When they’re done on one side, turn them over and cook the other side. 4. Remove from the BBQ, garnish with lemon slices and eat. 5. Feel like you’re on holiday... 8

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National Watercress Week: 16-21st May. Told you there were some weird weeks going on. I love watercress though, so here’s a Traditional Watercress Soup.

National Vegetarian Week: 23-29th May. We here at Deep-Towers are confirmed carnivores, but that doesn’t mean we don’t do veggie, especially when it’s probably even less healthy than what we normally eat, given the sheer amount of fromage in this Cheese and Spinach Veggie Lasagne. Thanks to Stewart Watson’s cousin for the recipe, and this is one that’s ideal for summer picnics and BBQs as it tastes as good cold the next day as it does hot...

Preparation time: 5 minutes Cooking time: 15 minutes You will need: • 15ml/1 tbsp olive oil • 1 small onion, chopped • 1 small stick celery • 350g/12oz potato, peeled and diced • 600ml/1pt chicken or vegetable stock • 3 (85g) bags watercress • 150ml/ 1/4 pt milk • pinch of nutmeg • squeeze of lemon juice • salt and freshly ground black pepper

You will need: • 1 and a half pound Spinach (680g) • Lasagne sheets • 1 jar plain tomato pasta sauce • 1 onion • Garlic clove • 250g Cottage Cheese • Mozarella cheese - 1 normal sized ball • 1 and a half cups grated medium Cheddar Cheese • Parmesan Cheese • Egg • Nutmeg • Salt and Pepper • Breadcrumbs

Method: 1. Heat the oil in a large pan, add the onion and celery and sauté over a medium heat for 5 mins until pale golden. 2. Stir in the potato and stock and bring to the boil. Cover and simmer for 10 mins or until the potato is tender. 3. Stir in the watercress, cover and cook for a further 5 mins or until the watercress is wilted. 4. Transfer the soup to a food processor and blitz until smooth. 5. Return the soup to the rinsed out pan add the milk, nutmeg, lemon juice and seasoning to taste. 6. Gently reheat until piping hot and serve with crusty bread. .................................................................................

Method: 1. Steam spinach 2. Fry or sautee the onion and garlic then add the spinach and sautee until it’s dried out a bit (not too many juices left in it). 3. In a bowl mix up the cottage cheese, cheddar, egg, nutmeg (just a pinch), salt and pepper 4. Put half of tomato pasta sauce in the bottom of a lasagne dish 5. Layer 1/3 of lasagne sheets on top 6. Layer half of spinach then half of cottage cheese mixture 7. Layer next 1/3 of lasagne sheets on top 8. Layer other half of spinach and other half of cottage cheese mixture on top 9. Layer sliced mozarella cheese on top of cottage cheesey mixture 10. Layer last 1/3 of lasagne sheets on 11. Pour on other half of tomato pasta sauce 12. Sprinkle with breadcrumbs and parmesan to cover 13. Bake for 40 mins or so at around gas mark 5 (390F / 200C) 14. Check pasta is cooked through before serving 15. Dig in!

Towel Day: And finally, apropos of it being Towel Day, the universal celebration of Douglas Adams and the Hitchhikers Guide To The Galaxy, on the 25th May, here’s a recipe for a Pan-Galactic Gargle Blaster. One of many recipes under the same name, however, it does differ from some of the more mundane versions in that it is actually served in an Ottawa nightclub - Zaphod Beeblebrox - and tastes fantastic despite not being quite as potent as the recipes involving Everclear, Bacardi 151 and all that lark. It also glows under ultra-violet lighting... Raise a glass (just the one, though, it’s still pretty lethal) on the day and feel “rather like having your brains smashed out with a slice of lemon, wrapped around a large gold brick”. Drink accompanied by peanuts, proudly wearing your towel, but most of all, DON’T PANIC!

Cheesy Veggie Lasagne

You will need: 1 oz Jack Daniel's Tennessee whiskey 1 oz peach schnapps 4 - 6 oz orange juice 1 splash Blue Curacao liqueur Method: Shake the orange juice, the Jack and the peach schnapps in a shaker 3/4 full with ice cubes. When it's chilled, strain into the highball glass and drizzle some of the blue Curacao liqueur over the top of it. Add a lemon twist and enjoy. Well, we say enjoy, it’s hard to enjoy anything when you live far out in the uncharted backwaters of the unfashionable end of the western spiral arm of the Galaxy near a small unregarded yellow sun. “Sorry, did I say something wrong? Pardon me for breathing, which I never do anyway so I don't know why I bother to say it, oh God, I'm so depressed...” More info on towel day at www.towelday.org 10

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Septuagenarian agony aunt cum rock mutton Auntie May returns from country-wide bunting hunting. . .

ello again folks. Well! Bless my cotton socks, what a fantastic April we’ve had this year. Jampacked full of bank holidays, sunshine, happy events, bunting and fun, I’ve been trying to forget the dismal fiscal state of things and get on with having some good, cheap fun. I say cheap, although I did start off by throwing away £4 by unsurprisingly putting it on the wrong horse at the Grand National. I arrived at Edith’s on the morning in question to find out she’d clearly been pet scrumping overnight, being suddenly in possession of a dog, a hamster and two noisy budgerigars. It

expedition took me first to London, which was strangely subdued I thought, and then on to Suffolk. Newmarket was beautifully decked out and I stopped for the night in Lowestoft where I was in such a hurry to get off the coach (I knew I should have packed some Tena-Lady) that I left my lovely faux wolf-skin cape on the coach. There are advantages to having distinctive clothing you know, as after a quick phone call to Yarmouth lost property, the kind gentleman was only too pleased to put it back on the next coach back to Lowestoft for me to collect and the coach driver, Penfold,

My compliments go to Princess Beatrice for daring to wear such a travesty of an ‘hat’ in a public place. . . transpired to be another one of Edith’s hair-brained money-making schemes, inspired by Adam the Farmer of Countryfile / Lambing Live fame, she’d decided animal husbandry was the way forward and was collecting specimens furiously. After, as I said, failing to win our beer money on a horse, we set off to the Oval for Junk Time Party’s 10th birthday party, and what a party that was! The pub was jammed and JTP were jumping as usual. Quite a few regulars from the Croham were doing impromptu shifts behind the bar to help out but with hindsight it would have been more sensible to buy two or three drinks at once. However, we were forced to leave when the band stopped playing and a DJ took over, playing some kind of mind-numbingly boring repetitive dross and Edith threatened to liven things up by raffling her dentures. We were intrigued to spot a poster for Croydon Folk & Blues Club advertising their Swingers Night, until I realised my beer goggles had inserted a ‘w’ which obviously changed things considerably. With the Royal Wedding looming, I decided to do something useful and conduct a country-wide survey of street decorations. My bunting-hunting 12

gingerly handed it to me with the words “Are you sure it’s dead?” My next stop was Great Yarmouth which was gaudily decked out with flags (mostly the free one in The Sun), bunting, and all kinds of commemorative tat which was selling like wildfire. Whilst there, I met a very helpful man who told me that the best place for bunting is Thetford, so obviously that was my next port of call. However, when I arrived, it seemed rather devoid of anything red, white and blue so I made enquiries in the local post office and was directed to The Nunnery. I arrived at the British Trust for Ornithology where a nice gentleman pointed up into the trees “There’s one, a chestnutbreasted bunting, and look, there’s a rock bunting.” That was slightly more my style but I made my excuses and headed off to my next port of call, Warwick. Warwick was decked out beautifully but Leamington Spa was better with flags fluttering madly from all the shop-

fronts and pubs. I was slightly put off by being charged nearly £8.50 for a pint of beer and a glass of wine and also by the fact that Beefeater menus now show the calorie count for everything on the menu (surely when you’re eating out you don’t want to be bothered by all that guilt?) And talking of guilt, did you know that it’s actually illegal to eat a Hot Cross Bun on Good Friday? No, I didn’t either but apparently we’re all breaking the law. My final stop was Brighton, actually on Royal Wedding Day itself, which I had expected to be far more over-thetop than it was, but people seemed to be having fun nevertheless. At last it was back home to sunny Croydon to watch an abbreviated version of the wedding on the evening news, and a lovely wedding it was too, especially the hattage. My compliments go to Princess Beatrice for daring to wear such a travesty of an hat in a public place - and what is it with stapling your hat to the front of your forehead? It was never like that in my day! I’ll be back down to earth next month and, in the meantime, I’ll see you under the bar. Auntie May returns next month. . .

bunting!

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A Deep Royal Wedding weekend beano down to Brighton, in pictures, by Groove Hoob...

r at brighton!

backing a winne

friendly barmaid Anna at The Quadrant pub

winnings!

on the beach! our bed at Kempfield House hotel! 14

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new friend woolly and me in the pub on royal wedding day - 10am!

woolly & the brighton

Prince Groove!

doughnut sculpture

on horses with Mr Mik!

time to go home...

I love my friend woolly! 15

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Or, Beard & Sandals Monthly, or, Furry Animals, Plants & Stars, or, Tree-Huggers Unite. It’s the Deep-London Page Of Nature. . .

ore pottering from the DeepLondon shed, which is now more like a greenhouse thanks to the weather...

Things to do in Croydon in your shed:

ad news on Deep-London’s homebrewing shenanigans in that we haven’t got around to it yet because we’ve been away for most of the month. But! We have the technology and the experts and will be starting it next month, promise...

What to Plant Now:

f you planted some chilli pepper seeds last month they should, with any luck and given the beautiful weather, have popped their little green heads out by now, so here’s what to do next: 1. Your chillies now have but one desire - light! Like we said last month, our is on a south facing window ledge and, from being pretty dormant a month ago has now gone absolutely mental (see pic below). 2. Water your chillies 2 or 3 times a week so that the soil is damp (not soaked). Overwatering on a regular basis will cause the roots to rot. 3. Repotting. When your chilli’s roots start to poke throught the drainage holes in your pot, repot them to a bigger receptacle. You may have to do this a couple of time depending on the size of

your plants. 4. You will eventually see flowers developing on the plant, leave them on and they will die after a few weeks and chillies will form. Once the plant is producing fruit you can help it along by giving it a small amount of organic liquid fertiliser every few weeks (tomato food is good for this). 5. When the plant is around 6 inches tall you can remove the growing tip, this will encourage the form of the plant to become more bush like. Chillies can reach around 60cm in height and can be supported with a garden cane or other suitable stake. This may be necessary when the plant is fruiting heavily. 6. The Chillies should take a few weeks to develop and will take a further couple of weeks to change from green to red. You can harvest them when they are Green or Red. They will start to shrivel after they have been on the plant for a while but they can still be harvested and used at this stage. 7. The longer you leave the chillies on the plant, the hotter in flavour they will become. Leaving the chilli on the plant after it is ready for harvest will result in a decline in further yields. 8. If you have a large amount of chillies ready for harvest at the same time and can't use them up fast enough then harvest and freeze any excess fruits.

Ramble On: The weather’s lovely and it’s time to get out and about and commune with nature (well, the page is subtitled Beard and Sandals monthly...). We at Deep Towers, and especially the Shed, like nothing better than a dib around with some wildlife, in which vein we’ve previously brought you, amongst others, the delights of Beaver Water World and Fanny’s Farm. This month we tried to find somewhere with an equally amusing name, a quest in which we failed, but we did stumble across the British Wildlife Trust, which we didn’t know existed but which is just down the road in Lingfield. According to its website, the British Wildlife Trust was founded in 1997 by succesful dairy farmer David Mills. “In 1994 David ceased farming in 16

order to realise a second dream of setting up a centre to educate people about our native wildlife. At first we were only open to pre-booked groups, but in 2000 we were able to open to the public. “We have been growing slowly but steadily since, enhancing the Centre to give visitors more to see and more to learn about Britain’s fascinating wildlife. “Our objective remains the same - to help people learn more about our native wildlife in the hope that they too will want to protect it for future generations to enjoy.” Among the 40-odd species you can see at the centre are adders, loads of different types of owls, minks, moles, badgers, muntjacs, otters, pine martens, black & brown rats, polecats, rabbits, buzzards, red deer, red & grey squirrels, fallow & roe deer, field & water voles, foxes, stoats, grass snake, harvest, wood, house and yellow-necked mice, weasels, hedgehogs, kestrels and wildcats. All the animals live in settings that reflect their natural environment and much of the area is outdoors, although there are plenty of undercover areas such as The Barn, The Hedgerow and an observation Badger Sett, meaning there is much to see at any time of the year and most animals can be seen whatever the weather. They also have loads of facilities such as picnic areas, a visitor centre, gift and coffee shops, regular keeper talks, animal adoption schemes and all sorts, all set in 20 acres of wetland, woodland and grassland habitat. They only open at weekends unless it’s a school holiday, of which there is yet another imminent, so why not get out and about and maybe stare at a weasel or two. We will be... British Wildlife Centre, Eastbourne Road (A22), Newchapel, Lingfield, Surrey RH7 6LF. More info on directions, opening times and prices etc at www.britishwildlifecentre.co.uk

Shed Of The Month No shed this month - boo! Send us your sheds - how difficult can it be to e-mail a picture?!? Jeez... Sometimes I wonder why I bother... See your shed here! Send a pic to hello@deep-london.co.uk.

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Stockists: CENTRAL CROYDON: • All Bar One • Bar Red Square • Bar Se7en • Black Sheep Bar • Brief • Bull’s Head • Clocktower (Tourist Info) • Dog & Bull • Fairfield Halls • George • Goose on the Market • Gun Tavern • Green Dragon • Half and Half Lounge Bar • Loop Lounge • Milan Bar • Mojama • Royal Standard • Ship • Spreadeagle • Steelpoint Tattoo • Surrey Cricketers • Tiger Tiger • Timebomb Clothing • Yates’s Wine Lodge EAST CROY: • Builders Arms • Glamorgan • Orchard • Oval • Porter & Sorter • Tramlink Info Centre • Warehouse Theatre WEST CROY: • Bird in Hand • Sims Tattoos • Davys Wine Bar • Forbidden Planet • Fox and Hounds • Windmill SOUTH END & SOUTH CROY: • Croham Arms • Crown & Pepper • Crown & Sceptre • Earl of Eldon • Edge • Folly

Pick up your copy of Deep from any of these lovely places:

• Jalalis • Kays Off Licence • LA Fitness (Royal Oak) • La Spezia Deli (Old Pharmacy - Swan & Sugarloaf) • Windsor Castle) • Peking Tasty • Purley Arms • Rail View • Red Deer • Rupali • Ruskin House • Sackville Gallery • Scream Studios • Stag & Hounds • Sth Croydon BR • Swan & Sugarloaf • Txt Bar • Treehouse • Wheelwrights Arms • Windsor Castle • Woodman • Zizzi

OLD COULSDON: • The Fox • Tudor Rose

ADDISCOMBE: • Alma Tavern • Claret Free Hs • Cricketers

THORNTON HEATH: • The Lord Napier

PURLEY: • Baan Thai • Brass Monkey • Coffee Bay (by Purley BR) • Elliott’s • Jolly Farmers • Las Fuentes • Rectory • Purley BR • Purley Pool • Purley Oaks BR • Station Cars PURLEY WAY: • Gipsy Moth • Premier Travel Inn Hotel • Green’s Gym COULSDON: • The Pembroke

SANDERST’D: • Sanderstead BR • Stones Hair Salon • Wine Cellar SHIRLEY: • Cricketers • Crown • Sandrock • Shirley Inn • Surprise Inn FORESTDALE: • Forestdale Arms • McDermott’s Fish Restaurant SELHURST: • Selhurst Arms • White Horse • Two Brewers • Lion Inn

WOODSIDE GREEN: • Beehive SOUTH NORWOOD: • Portmanor KENLEY: • Kenley Arms WHYTELEAFE: • Whyteleafe Tavern

Listings Index: What’s on? 19 full weekly and daily guide All our information was correct at the time of going to press, but as the only certainty in life is change, we suggest you check before heading out. The opinions and reviews which follow are those of the Editor and staff - if you have an issue to raise about them, please ring us, rather than the venue.

Got something going on? We’re not psychic, people - let us know! What’s on listings are FREE! Call Angela on 07910 506197 or e-mail: angela@deep-london.co.uk

Deep-London Readership: 25,046 monthly plus online at www.deep-london.co.uk on facebook (deep-london). Follow us on Twitter: @deep_london

GET YOUR EVENT LISTED: e-mail: ANGELA@ DEEP-LONDON.CO.UK

Last date for inclusion in June issue -

20 MAY 2011 Advertising in Deep-London: Prices from just £10 upwards depending on type, size and placement all prices are per month and VAT exempt

discounts available for block booking etc

Advert design service available To advertise please call Angela the Editor on: 07910 506197 / 020 8680 3558 e-mail: angela@deep-london.co.uk

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What’s On - Regular Every Day / Monthly Events: Every Day: • Market: Surrey Street (Not Sunday) London’s oldest continuously running market since 1276, with fruit and veg, bits and pieces, meat and fish, hot food, all sorts. Use it or lose it, people. Open Mon-Sat from ridiculously early... Surrey Street, Croydon www.surreystreetmarket.com • Museum: Museum Of Croydon Monday - Saturday, 11am - 5pm (Closed Sundays and Bank Holidays) Permanent Galleries: Croydon History - Follow the story of Croydon from 1800 to now. The Riesco Collection of Chinese Ceramics is on permanent display in the Riesco Gallery at Croydon Clocktower. The Croydon Art Collection contains over 2000 paintings, prints and drawings. Depictions of local scenes and landmarks are stored alongside works by Henry Moore, Bridget Riley and Bengali poet Rabindranath Tagore. Museum Of Croydon, Clocktower, Katharine Street • Wildlife: Beaver Waterworld We at deep are HUGE fans of Beaver Waterworld, and not just because of the amusing name. They’ve got birds, beavers, lizards, snakes, crocodiles, tons of other animals. A registered charity, BWW is also a rehoming centre. “Our aim at Beaver Water World Reptile Zoo is to be a refuge - a Noah's Ark for rare and rescued reptiles”. Open EVERY Day except Xmas Day - 10am to 5pm. Adults - £4.00, Children - £3.00 Beaver Water World, Waylands Farm, Approach Road, Tatsfield, Nr. Westerham Kent. TN16 2JT, Tel: 01959 577747 www.beaverwaterworld.com • Farm: Fanny’s Farm To complement Beaver Waterworld... Farmshop, Tearooms and tea gardens, Childrens play area, Florists, Chickens, pigs and sheep, The famous treehouse, Landscape garden/garden centre, chickens, 2 new vietnamese pot bellied pigs - Burt and Ernie - and sheep. Fanny's Farm Shop, is the perfect place to enjoy a cream tea, fresh coffee or a ploughman's lunch featuring local cheeses. Fanny's features a wide range of local produce to buy, including jam and marmalade, honey, floral arrangements, pickle, mustards, fresh vegetables, bacon and eggs, cakes and handmade gifts. Opening Hours - 9.00am to 6.00pm every day including bank holidays, although we do stop serving teas at 5.00pm. Fannys Farm Shop, MarkEdge Lane, Merstham, Surrey RH1 3AW

email: fanny@fannysfarmshop.co.uk Tel: 01737 554444 http://fannysfarmshop.co.uk

................................. 1st Tuesday of the month: • Live Music: Rob and Friends Jamming. From 8.30pm. The Royal Standard, 1 Sheldon Street, Croydon, CR0 1SS, 020 8688 9749 For more events, find us on facebook!

1st Wednesday: • Kids: Iggy and Loong’s Under 5s Until March 2011 (except January) 10.30am, 11.15am & 12pm (30 mins). Join Iggy the iguana and Loong the Chinese dragon for songs, games and stories in the Riesco Gallery. Aimed at the Under 5s. FREE! Just drop in. Riesco Gallery (ground floor), Croydon Clocktower, Katharine Street, Croydon. www.croydonclocktower.org.uk

1st Thursday: • Live Music: The New Delta Big Band From Ellington to Herman, big band jazz at its best! 8.15-11pm. FREE! The Lord Napier, 111 Beaulah Road, Thornton Heath, CR7. 020 8653 2286. • Gay: Quiz Monthly quiz night. The Bird In Hand, 291 Sydenham Road, Croydon, CR0 2EL. 020 8683 3104 www.birdinhand.uk.com • Comedy: Upfront Comedy Club Hosting a different line-up of black comedians every month. See Clocktower website for who’s on. “The most enterprising black comedy promoters in the country" The Guardian. 8pm. £9.50 (£7.50 conc) Croydon Clocktower, Katharine St, Croydon. More info from www.croydonclocktower.org.uk

1st Monday: • Music: Folk/Blues Singers & Musicians Night No need to book just come along to sing and play! £3 Croydon Folk and Blues Club, Ruskin House, 23 Coombe Road, Croydon, CR0 1BD. www.croydonfolkclub.org.uk 020 8660 5919 or 0770 3210 795

1st Wednesday: • Kids: Under 5’s Event Meet the very soft and cuddly Iggy the iguana and Loong the Chinese dragon puppets for stories and songs Wednesdays 2 February & 2 March at 10.30am, 11.15am & 12pm (30 mins) Free, drop in Venue: Riesco Gallery (ground floor of the Clocktower). FREE entry. Croydon Clocktower, Katharine Street, Croydon.

1st Friday: • Club: Groove On Funk club. Upstairs at The Treehouse, 78 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1DP, 020 8688 9837 www.treehousepeople.com • Poetry: Poets Anonymous Friday Poetry at the Fairfield Hotel Bar, 1 Lansdowne Road, Croydon, Surrey CR9 2BN. Floor spots. From 8pm. £2 waged, £1 unwaged. Contact Peter for further details; peter@poetsanon.org.uk, 020 8645 9956.

1st Saturday: • Music: DJ Rob Delta Playing Funk, blues, soul and psychedelia. The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, East Croydon, CR0 6BR www.ovaltavern.co.uk • Club: Retro-Rewind Get your platforms on and dust off those flares as John Lazenby of DISCO79.com and The Arc, transport you back in time playing hours of the best 60s, 70s and 80s music guaranteed to pull you to the dance floor. Concentrating mainly on the 70’s and 80’s disco era with a bit of 60’s soul, R&B, pop and rock, 70’s glam rock, 80’s new romantic and happy songs from Wham and the like to have you jumping to the beat! £5 in advance or £8 on the door. Strictly over 21s. Doors open at 8pm and bar closes at Midnight. Booking line: 01883 330380. More info email info@the-arc-caterham.co.uk or visit www.the-arc-caterham.co.uk The Arc, 39 Weston Drive, Caterham, Surrey, CR3 5XY

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What’s On - Regular Monthly Events: 1st Sunday:

2nd Tuesday:

3rd Sunday:

• Green: Heathfield Ecology Centre Normally open from around 10 o'clock until about 5 o'clock (or dusk, whichever is sooner) on the 1st and 3rd Sunday of each month except for 1st January or when there is another event. Established in 1997 and operates out of the Old Orchard in the grounds of Heathfield House. The centre raises awareness of Croydon's green heritage and helps to preseve the borough's biodiversity. For full details of activities and membership visit www.heathfield-ecology.org.uk The Old Orchard, Heathfield, Coombe Lane, Croydon CR0 5RH

• Comedy: Comedy Night with host Gareth and guest comedians. From 8.30pm. The Royal Standard, 1 Sheldon Street, Croydon, CR0 1SS, 020 8688 9749 For more events, find us on facebook! • Group: Croydon Round Table of Inventors was established to provide a network and forum for local Croydon inventors to share ideas and experiences. It is a non-profit club, run by inventors and for inventors. Meetings take place on the second Tuesday of every month in the Town Hall, Katharine Street, Croydon from 6:30pm to 9:30pm. Please check this event is on before heading out.

• Group: Heathfield Ecology Centre Normally open from around 10 o'clock until about 5 o'clock (or dusk, whichever is sooner) on the 1st and 3rd Sunday of each month except for 1st January or when there is another event. Established in 1997 and operates out of the Old Orchard in the grounds of Heathfield House. The centre raises awareness of Croydon's green heritage and helps to preseve the borough's biodiversity. For full details of activities and membership visit www.heathfield-ecology.org.uk The Old Orchard, Heathfield, Coombe Lane, Croydon CR0 5RH • Music: ‘The Ukelele & Other Machines’ Ukelele Jam A relaxed, informal ukulele play-along session where you are the band! Everyone joins in, playing songs from our own songbook, from 60s classics to Bon Jovi, Radiohead, The Smiths and everything in between. Bring your own ukulele if you have one but we do have a couple of spares if you want to try it out. Absolutely all abilities welcome, from complete novices to good players. Everyone can play something, we guarantee it! See “the ukulele & Other Machines” website http://ukulele.website.orange.co.uk for more details and link to all our songs. Green Dragon 58-60 High St, Croydon CR0 1NA 1st and 3rd Sunday of month, 7:30pm to 10-00pm, upstairs bar.

• Music: ‘The Ukelele & Other Machines’ Ukelele Jam A relaxed, informal ukulele play-along session where you are the band! Everyone joins in, playing songs from our own songbook, from 60s classics to Bon Jovi, Radiohead, The Smiths and everything in between. Bring your own ukulele if you have one but we do have a couple of spares if you want to try it out. Absolutely all abilities welcome, from complete novices to good players. Everyone can play something, we guarantee it! See “the ukulele & Other Machines” website http://ukulele.website.orange.co.uk for more details and link to all our songs. Green Dragon 58-60 High St, Croydon CR0 1NA 1st and 3rd Sunday of month, 7:30pm to 10-00pm, upstairs bar

2nd Thursday: • Live Music: The Brian Hetherington Jazz Band Listen or jive to the authentic rythyms of New Orleans! 8.15-11pm. FREE! The Lord Napier, 111 Beaulah Road, Thornton Heath, CR7. 020 8653 2286.

2nd Saturday: • Poetry: Poets Anonymous Saturday Poetry in the Primary Room, United Reformed Church, Addiscombe Grove, Croydon, Surrey, CR0 5LP. 2.304.00pm. £2.00. Bring your poetry to read and share. Contact Peter for further details; peter@poetsanon.org.uk, 020 8645 9956

3rd Monday: • Music: Folk/Blues Singers & Musicians Night No need to book just come along to sing and play! £3. Croydon Folk and Blues Club, Ruskin House, 23 Coombe Road, Croydon, CR0 1BD. www.croydonfolkclub.org.uk 020 8660 5919 or 0770 3210 795

3rd Thursday: 2nd Monday: • Group: Croydon Writers Writing group. 7.45pm. New Members welcome.. Annual membership - £16.00 Meetings - £2 per meeting for members, £4 per meeting for non members. More info from www.croydonwriters.org.uk The Library, Croydon Cloctower, Katharine Street, Croydon

• Music: The New Delta Big Band From Ellington to Herman, big band jazz at its best! 8.15-11pm. FREE! The Lord Napier, 111 Beaulah Road, Thornton Heath, CR7. 020 8653 2286. • Gay: Quiz The Bird In Hand, 291 Sydenham Road, Croydon, CR0 2EL, 020 8683, 3104 www.birdinhand.co.uk.

4th Tuesday: • Live Music: Open Mic Simon Hughes's blues and acoustic Open Mike nights. We let you entertain us! From 8.30pm. FREE! The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, East Croydon, CR0 6BR www.ovaltavern.co.uk

4th Thursday: • Live Music: The Brian Hetherington Jazz Band Listen or jive to the authentic rythyms of New Orleans! 8.15-11pm. FREE! The Lord Napier, 111 Beaulah Road, Thornton Heath, CR7. 020 8653 2286.

4th Saturday: • Music: DJ BennyManyHats Playing the way only Benny can. The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, East Croydon, CR0 6BR www.ovaltavern.co.uk

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What’s On - Regular Weekly Events: Last Monday:

• Quiz: The Croham - NEW! A new quiz night from Wendy’s Wonderful Quiz at The Dragon fame. From 8pm. Teams of up to 6 and £1.50 entry per person. The Croham Arms, Croham Road, South Croydon

Surrey CR8 2HA, 020 8660 2076 www.jollyfarmers-purley.co.uk • Club: Half Price Mondays 50% off all drinks (excluding champagne) from 7pm til midnight. Free entry before 10pm. Black Sheep Bar, 68 High St, CR0. 020 8680 2233. www.blacksheepbar.com www.myspace.com/blacksheepbar • Group: Croydon Natural History and Scientific Society meets on most Monday evenings from 19:45 at the Small Hall of the United Reform Church in Addiscombe Grove, East Croydon. For more information about the society go to www.greig51.freeserve.co.uk/cnhss/index. htm#about

Last Friday:

Every Tuesday:

• Science: Cafe Scientifique Free talks and discussions with a scientist on a subject of topical interest on the last Monday of each month from 18:30 to 20:00 in the Braithwaite Hall (Croydon Clocktower, Katharine Street, Croydon) no ticket necessary.

Last Thursday:

• Club: Histree House Last Friday of the month. Old-skool house. Open til 3am. Free entry for Treehouse diners, otherwise £5. Upstairs at The Treehouse, 78 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1DP, 020 8688 9837 www.treehousepeople.com

................................. Every Monday:

• Quiz: Green Dragon Wendy’s marvellous pub quiz. 8pm every Monday. Jackpot round! £1 in, winning team gets the cash. Green Dragon, High Street, Croydon • Music: Community Choir 6:30pm, upstairs The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub • Club: Blue Monday Buy one hour of Pool and receive one hour free of charge. Don’t worry if you are on a one-hour lunch break - we will give you a voucher to use another day. If you are not a member you can join at reception free of charge if you bring some ID along. More about free membership. Half price on all drinks Monday to Thursday 5pm to 7pm Fridays 5pm to 9pm. Open Midday until 11pm. Admission is free of charge Dress Code: No caps, sportswear, or hooded tops. Jeans and trainers are permitted. Over 18s only - ID required. Loop Lounge, 12 Crown Hill, Croydon, CR0 1RZ. 020 8760 7000 www.looplounge.co.uk • Games: Poker Night Poker at the Jolly Farmers. The Jolly Farmers, 7 Purley Rd, Purley

• Music: Jazz Jam Session Every Tuesday Night at The Lord Napier Jazz Pub. All welcome. The Lord Napier, 111 Beulah Road, Thornton Heath. 020 8653 2286 • Sport: Roller Derby Monks Hill Sports Centre 9-10pm Also croydon roller derby are taking on new skaters so anyone who's Interested please contact us at fenrisflyers@gmail.com or deathpixie666@hotmail.com • Quiz: The Good Companions Wendy’s marvellous pub quiz travels to Hamsey Green every Tuesday from 8pm. The Good Companions, Hamsey Green, Croydon. • Quiz: The Pembroke 8pm. 50p per person per round. Plus 2 for 1 on pizzas. The Pembroke, 12-16 Chipstead Valley Road, Coulsdon, CR5 2RA 020 8763 0800 • Quiz: The Builders Arms Fun general knowledge quiz. The Builders Arms, 65 Leslie Park Road, Croydon, CR0 6TP, 020 8654 1803 • Club: Cheap Sheep Tuesdays DJ Magoo plays the most ripe Electro, DnB, Dubstep, Indie and Ska while you enjoy £1.50 PINTS, £1.25 SPIRIT MIXERS, £1 SHOTS + £2.50 VODKA RED BULL ALL NIGHT. Doors 7pm til late, FREE ENTRY before 9pm. Black Sheep Bar, 68 High St, CR0. 020 8680 2233. www.blacksheepbar.com • Music: Freedom of Expression presents the best in acoustic music, comedy, poetry and magic - see daily what’s on for who’s playing when. From 8pm. FREE! The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub • Fitness: Yoga Classes 21

Every Tuesday from 7.30pm-9pm. £5 a class for 6 sessions. Beginners welcome. 140 Brighton Road, Purley. 0208 763 2629 • Dance: Strictly Fun Dancing Ballroom Dancing every Tuesday. Beginners - 7pm. £6 Improvers - 7.45pm. £6 Social Dance - 8.30pm. £7 Buy two sessions for £11, 3 for £16. Arnham Gallery, Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk • Community: Women-Only Swimming Sessions South Norwood pool: Tuesdays 8-10pm. The cost for a non-member adult swim is £3.30 per hour. For further information on membership, activities, prices and timetables go to www.fusionlifestyle.com/contracts/Croydon_Council

Every Wednesday: • Museum: East Surrey Museum Open 10am-5pm Wednesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays Permanent Galleries: Local History The development of our area from earliest times. It contains sections on Geology and fossils, Stone Ages, Bronze and Iron Ages, the Romans in East Surrey, an Anglo-Saxon corner, medieval times and modern history. Also stages various transient exhibitions. Admission is free but donations are welcomed. East Surrey Museum, 1 Stafford Road Caterham, CR3 6JG. 01883 340 275 www.eastsurreymuseum.org • Quiz: Mike K’s General Knowledge Quiz From 9.00pm Mike K’s general knowledge quiz, non-members welcome! Caterham Club, 10A, Croydon Road, Caterham CR36QB • Quiz: Foxley Hatch Every Wednesday from 8pm. £1 entry per person - winner takes all. Maximum 4 on a team. The Foxley Hatch, Purley • Event: Talent Night Talent Night Open Mic. Every Wednesday. £200 prize! The Whyteleafe Tavern, 208 Godstone Road, Whyteleafe, CR3 0EE www.whyteleafetavern.com • Pool: American 8-Ball Pool Competition Test your pool skills against Croydon’s finest pool players as we launch a new weekly cash prize competition that will also see players gaining ranking points to become Croydon’s number 1 pool player. 10 Week Ranking League

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What’s On - Regular Weekly Events: Cash Prizes - £10 Entry Fee Weekly knock out competition • Winner receives 75% of entry pot (remaining 25% to go towards ranking league) • Best of 3 frames • Semi final and final best of 5 frames 10 Week Ranking League • Points given for progress in weekly knock out competition. • Winner receives 75% of total pot • Runner up receives 25% of total pot Half price drinks 5-7pm Midday until midnight. Dress: No caps, sportswear, or hooded tops. Jeans and trainers are permitted. Over 18s only - ID required. Loop Lounge, 12 Crown Hill, Croydon, CR0 1RZ. 020 8760 7000 www.looplounge.co.uk • Poker: King Of Clubs Loop Lounge Poker Night: It's the standard Texas Hold’em format that we all know and love. This night is open to all Loop Lounge members. To register an interest and book a place at our tables please visit our website. Open Midday until midnight Half price on all drinks: Monday to Thursday 5pm to 7pm, Fridays 5pm to 9pm Open Midday until 11pm. FREE entry. Dress: No caps, sportswear, or hooded tops. Jeans and trainers are permitted. Over 18s only - ID required. Loop Lounge, 12 Crown Hill, Croydon, CR0 1RZ. 020 8760 7000 www.looplounge.co.uk • Dance: Dancercise Keep fit and meet new people at this fun and friendly beginners dance class. Come and join the fun every Wednesday. 7.30pm. £3.50. Central Court, Croydon Clocktower, Katharine Street, Croydon www.croydonclocktower.org.uk • Dance: Swing Patrol swing dance classes, 7pm, £5. The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub • Club: Dub Kulture heavy vinyl dubstep collective, featuring controller PISTONSBENEATH and guest DJS. Doors 8pm til late, FREE ENTRY before 10pm, £2 after. CHEAP SHEEP drinks deals 8-11pm. £1.50 pints, £1.25 spirit mixers, £1 shots, £2.50 vodka Red Bull. Black Sheep Bar, 68 High St, CR0. 020 8680 2233. www.blacksheepbar.com www.myspace.com/blacksheepbar • Event: Film & Food plus... Films & Food every week, Poker, Rock Quiz night and Live comedy on monthly

rotation See www.myspace.com/screamstudios or daily listings for what's on and when 8pm, Free Entry Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN • Music: FREE Classical Concerts Free lunchtime classical music performances at the Clocktower Croydon. All performances start at 1.30pm. Bring your own picnic, wear a tux if you like, or just come as you are and enjoy your lunch in the incredible unique setting of the Braithwaite Hall at The Clocktower, a grade 2 listed building, island of heritage in Croydon’s town centre. George Mayne will present a specially curated free programme of some his favourite classical pieces every Wednesday lunchtime throughout August. The Clocktower Cafe is launching a special offer to celebrate these lunchtime recitals with 20% off all hot meals and a special High Tea consisting of mini sandwiches, tea, scome and clotted cream for £3.95 after the concert. Braithwaite Hall, Croydon Clocktower, Katharine Street, Croydon. www.croydonclocktower.org.uk • Sport: Brighton Dogs Every Wednesday afternoon - Greyhound Racing. Doors 1pm. More info from www. brightonandhovegreyhoundstadium.co.uk • Music: Liquid Drum ‘n’ Bass Every Wednesday evening. Taberners Lounge Bar, St George’s Walk, Croydon. www.tabernersloungebar.com • Social: Croydon D&S Social Club NEW! ARE YOU DIVORCED - SEPARATED - or WIDOWED ? ARE YOU LONELY Stuck indoors with nowhere to go? THEN THIS IS THE CLUB FOR YOU!!! Why not come along and give it a try Plenty of Car parking spaces DISCO, DANCING and VARIOUS EVENTS during the year - Car rally, Darts Tournament, Saturday Dances, Days out, Weekends away, Outings to Warners, Yarmouth, Isle of Wight, etc. etc Whatever your age, we get lonely Why not meet new people, make new friends and enjoy yourselves. Bring your own alcohol No admittance after 10.00pm Smart Jeans - NO TRAINERS Membership £10 per year Wednesday Admission £3.00 Every Wednesday evening. 8-11pm. St Mary's Church hall, Wellesley Road Croydon opposite Station Road Near West Croydon Bus/Tram/Train Station. www.croydon-ds.co.uk 22

Every Thursday: • Museum: East Surrey Museum Open 10am-5pm Wednesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays. See every Wednesday. East Surrey Museum, 1 Stafford Road Caterham, CR3 6JG. 01883 340 275 www.eastsurreymuseum.org • Tattoos: Walk-In Day No need to book in advance on a Thursday only at Sims, get there early! 11am-6pm. Sims Tattoos, 69 Windmill Road, Croydon, CR0 2XR, 020 8684 6967 • Quiz: Two Brewers From 9pm. Two Brewers, 221 Gloucester Road, Croydon, 020 8684 3544 • Quiz: Purley Arms Every Thursday. Purley Arms, 345 Brighton Road, South Croydon, 020 8686 3792 • Quiz: JF Big Quiz £1 per player, win prizes, league points, and maybe cash in our Open The Box game! New teams always welcome. The Jolly Farmers, 7 Purley Rd, Purley Surrey CR8 2HA, 020 8660 2076 www.jollyfarmers-purley.co.uk • Music: Metal Thursday Metal Night at Scream Lounge At least 3 top notch local and touring metal acts every week at Scream, including regular Grindhouse nights sponsored by Terrorizer metal magazine. Door price includes free entry to Black Sheep Bar rock night before 11pm See www.myspace.com/screamstudios or daily listings for what's on and when. Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN • Quiz: Crown and Sceptre From 9pm. Crown and Sceptre, 32 Junction Road, South Croydon, 020 8688 8037 • Club: ALT.X Rock / Metal / Alternative with DJ Tony X plus guests. CHEAP SHEEP drinks deals till 10pm, plus £1 shots of Jager all night! FREE ENTRY before 10pm, doors 7pm.. Black Sheep Bar, 68 High St, CR0. 020 8680 2233. www.blacksheepbar.com www.myspace.com/blacksheepbar • Music: Live Blues Live blues at The Oval - see daily what’s on for who’s playing when. Every Thursday and Sunday. Bands start 8pm Thursdays, 5.30pm Sundays. FREE entry! The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, Croydon, CR0 6BR. 020 8686 6023 www.ovaltavern.co.uk • Music: Live Jazz

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What’s On - Regular Weekly Events: Check monthly regular events for who’s playing when. 8.15pm to 11pm. FREE! The Lord Napier, 111 Beulah Road, Thornton Heath CR7. 020 8653 2286 • Dance: Clog Dancing Free taster sessions for newcomers to try out some lively N.W. English clog team dances - wear trainers or similar footwear. Musicians with portable acoustic instruments always welcome too. PLEASE CALL BEFORE HEADING OUT, as some Thursdays this night is not on. 8.30 pm. FREE! Call 020 8654 5211/020 8657 4056 (eves.) for details United Reformed Church Hall, corner Enmore/Cobden Road, S. Norwood • Dance: Morris Dancing North Wood Morris Men are teaching Men's Morris to complete beginners on Thursday evenings at the Scout Hut in Purley Park Road at 8.15 pm and newcomers are welcome (first call 020 8668 1830) see www.northwoodmorris.org.uk • Dance: The South East London Lindy Hop Club Come and learn to dance Lindy Hop (Jitterbug) like they did in the 1940's. No partner required and Caron and Steve specialise in helping those with two left feet get together with those with two right. Doors open 7.30pm Beginners Class 7.45pm Intermediate Class 8.30pm Freestyle (practice) 9.15pm The Royston Club, 85 Royston Road Penge, London, SE20 7QW www.52ndstreetjump.co.uk • Club: Playhouse House music now has a home A new weekly night takes form in the guise of PlayHouse. Bringing in fresh talent and fresh sounds this is the official start to every weekend. Playhouse drinks promotions all night. 9.30pm until 2.30am Entry £5 or guest list £3 For guest list email full names and date in advance to thursdays@looplounge.co.uk R.O.A.R. Smart/Casual Dress. Strictly Over 18 years of age only; photo ID is required Loop Lounge, 12 Crown Hill, Croydon, CR0 1RZ. 020 8760 7000 www.looplounge.co.uk • Gay: Quiz New every Thursday, quiz night at The Bird. The Bird In Hand, 291 Sydenham Road, Croydon, CR0 2EL. 020 8683 3104 www.birdinhand.uk.com • Sport: Brighton Dogs Every Thursday night - Greyhound Racing. Doors 6.30pm. More info from www. brightonandhovegreyhoundstadium.co.uk • Club: Liquid Thursdays

Any drink, all day £2! (large £1 extra) Music policy: Live DJ mixing Liquid Drum & Base from DJ Phyco. Come and try some of our complimentary tasty Nachos (while stcoks last). Taberners Lounge Bar, St George’s Walk, Croydon. www.tabernersloungebar.com

Every Friday: • Music: DJs Every Friday Night The Folly, 13-15 Selsdon Road, Croydon, 020 8688 3920 • Music: Live Music Alternating live bands and karaoke every Friday Night The Bedford Tavern, 16 Sydenham Road, Croydon, CR0 2EF, 020 8688 2584 • Karaoke: Wheelwright’s Arms From 8.30pm every Friday night. Wheelwright’s Arms, 126 Southbridge Road, Croydon, CR0 1AF • Music: Oval DJs The regular Oval faves, plus guests, keeping Fridays funky. The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, Croydon, CR0 6BR 020 8686 6023, www.ovaltavern.co.uk • Music: Live Music Every Friday night from 8pm. Plus 2 for 1 on Corona and Jacques. The Pembroke, 12-16 Chipstead Valley Road, Coulsdon, CR5 2RA 020 8763 0800 • Event: Wii Night Every Friday evening. The View, 188 selsdon Road, South Croydon, CR2 6PL, 020 8688 2315. • Club: WTF? our decades of Indie, Alternative, Electro and Punk hits from DJ Zoe Urchin. CHEAP SHEEP drinks deals till 9pm. Doors 7pm, FREE ENTRY before 10pm. Black Sheep Bar, 68 High St, CR0. 020 8680 2233. www.blacksheepbar.com www.myspace.com/blacksheepbar • Photography: Camera Club Camera Club meeting in West Croydon every Friday night welcomes visitors and new members. Full programme of events including print/slide talks, portrait evenings, competitions, etc. Ample parking. Contact Colin on 020 8665 1678. Visit www.thorntonheathcameraclub.co.uk • Sport: Wimbledon Dogs Every Friday night - Greyhound Racing. First race 7.30pm The turnstiles open at 6:30pm and the restaurant doors open at 6:30pm. 23

General Admission Prices If you just want to turn up on the night the prices are: * Adults: £5.00 (including racecard) * Children 12 - 17: £3.00 (no race card) * Children under 11: Free (no race card) Please note, pushchairs and buggies are not permitted in the Stadium. Loads of admission offers and more info at www.lovethedogs.co.uk GRA Wimbledon Stadium, Plough Lane, London, SW17 0BL Stadium Telephone: 0870 880 1000 • Club: Old Skool Garage Every Friday loop lounge brings you a night of old skool garage classics with the cheapest drinks promotion in Croydon. Residents DJ Kure and Stan da Man take to the decks with special guest MCs every week. For table bookings, vip and info, please email bookings@looplounge.co.uk Resident DJs DJ Kure Stan da Man Guest MCs every week Drinks promotions all night 10pm until 3am Entry £5 Loop Lounge is an over 18s venue, photo ID is required by all. No ID, no entry. Loop Lounge, 12 Crown Hill, Croydon, CR0 1RZ. 020 8760 7000 www.looplounge.co.uk • Club: Blow Techno, Electronic, Drum ‘n’ Bass, Dubstep, House, Mash Up across 3 rooms. Every Friday 10pm til super-late. £8 adv, £10 on the door. Egg, 200 York Way, King’s Cross, London N1 • Sport: Brighton Dogs Every Friday lunchtime - Greyhound Racing. Doors 10.30am. More info from www. brightonandhovegreyhoundstadium.co.uk

Every Saturday: • Museum: East Surrey Museum Open 10am-5pm Wednesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays See every Wednesday. East Surrey Museum, 1 Stafford Road Caterham, CR3 6JG. 01883 340 275 www.eastsurreymuseum.org • Music: Various Live music every Saturday Night. The Surrey Cricketers, corner of Lower Coombe Street and West Street, Croydon. • Market: Garden Market The Alma Garden Market hopes to create a vibrant bustling market place in the large private courtyard of The Alma pub in

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What’s On - Weekly Events / Daily Guide: Crystal Palace. It runs every Saturday with over 20 stalls selling plants & flowers, beauty products & treatments, exotic oils, olive oils, capers, strawberries, chocolates, jewellery, hand made cards, rugs, leatherwear, knitwear, deli produce & a wide range of arts & crafts from local artists, plus hot food and collectables - and the Jerk Chicken man will be there! 10am - 4pm The Alma, 95 Church Road, Crystal Palace, London SE19 www.thealmapub.com • Music: Live Rock Bands Every Saturday Night Portmanor, Portland Road, South Norwood, SE25 4UF, 020 8655 1308 • Club: Linton Dance bombs. Funk Rockets. Beat-seeking missiles. Never outgunned. The biggest dancefloor monsters from DJ LINTON. Because it's war on the dancefloor. CHEAP SHEEP drinks deals till 9pm. Doors 7pm, FREE ENTRY before 10pm. Black Sheep Bar, 68 High St, CR0. 020 8680 2233. www.blacksheepbar.com www.myspace.com/blacksheepbar • Club: Tiger Tiger Tiger and Raffles Bar: with Capital FM Des Paul and Chris Brooks playing out the best in commercial party and dance anthems.Groovy Wonderland: 70’s and 80’s floor fillers. Club: Commercial House. Admission free before 10pm, £7 after. Guestlist free before 11pm, £5 after. Dress code: Dress to Impress - No Sportswear. Tiger Tiger, 14-16 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1GT. 020 8662 4949. www.tigertigercroydon.co.uk • Music: New Orleans Jazz Quality live jazz every Saturday Night. From 8.30pm. £6 entry includes free raffle. Blackheath Hockey Club, Rubens Street, Sydenham, SE6 4DH (behind Old Rutland Pub) • Music: Various Live music most Saturday nights. The Good Companions, Hamsey Green, South Croydon. 020 8657 6655 • Gay: Party Night Every Saturday nigt is party night at The Bird. The Bird In Hand, 291 Sydenham Road, Croydon, CR0 2EL. 020 8683 3104 www.birdinhand.uk.com • Burlesque: Tassel Club Tassel Club Supper Club. Contact reservations@proud.co.uk for direct bookings Proud Cabaret, London. www.proud.co.uk • Sport: Wimbledon Dogs Every Friday night - Greyhound Racing. First race 7.30pm The turnstiles open at 6:30pm and the

restaurant doors open at 6:30pm. General Admission Prices If you just want to turn up on the night the prices are: * Adults: £5.00 (including racecard) * Children 12 - 17: £3.00 (no race card) * Children under 11: Free (no race card) Please note, pushchairs and buggies are not permitted in the Stadium. Loads of admission offers and more info at www.lovethedogs.co.uk GRA Wimbledon Stadium, Plough Lane, London, SW17 0BL Stadium Telephone: 0870 880 1000 • Sport: Brighton Dogs Every Saturday night - Greyhound Racing. Doors 6.30pm. More info from www. brightonandhovegreyhoundstadium.co.uk • Kids: Storytime with Jenny Lockyer Stories, songs, puppetry, activities and lots of fun! It's aimed at 3-7 year olds, but all are welcome! It's every Saturday and it's FREE! 1pm-3pm. Upstairs at the Green Dragon 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1NA • Community: Women-Only Swimming Sessions Thornton Heath pool: Saturday 4.45 6.45pm. New Addington pool: Saturdays 2.30-3.30pm. The cost for a non-member adult swim is £3.30 per hour. For further information on membership, activities, prices and timetables go to www.fusionlifestyle.com/contracts/Croydon_Council

Every Sunday: • Music: New Orleans Jazz Every Sunday 12.30 - 2.30pm at The Lord Napier Jazz Pub. Entry £2, dance floor, raffle, great atmosphere at one of the longest running Jazz Pubs in Great Britain The Lord Napier, 111 Beulah Road, Thornton Heath. 020 8653 2286 • Music: Live Jazz Lunchtime Jazz every Sunday from 1pm. See daily what’s on for who’s playing this month. FREE! The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub • Music: Live Blues Live blues at The Oval - see daily what’s on for who’s playing when. Every Thursday and Sunday. Bands start 8pm Thursdays, 5.30pm Sundays. FREE entry! The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, Croydon, CR0 6BR 020 8686 6023 24

www.ovaltavern.co.uk • Quiz: The View Every Sunday evening. The View, 188 selsdon Road, South Croydon, CR2 6PL, 020 8688 2315. • Quiz: Wheelwright’s Arms From 8pm. Wheelwright’s Arms, 126 Southbridge Road, Croydon, CR0 1AF • Quiz: Two Brewers Fun general knowledge quiz. From 9pm. Two Brewers, 221 Gloucester Road, Croydon, 020 8684 3544 • Quiz: The Spread Eagle Fun quiz with round prizes as well as main prize. £1 per person. From 7pm. The Spread Eagle, 39-41 Katharine St, Croydon, CR0 1NX, 020 8781 1134 • Karaoke: The White Horse Every Sunday Night from 7pm. The White Horse, 1 Selhurst Road, Selhurst, South Norwood, 020 8240 0948 • Music: Open Mic Musicians (all instruments) welcome. With one of our 4 fantastic hosts: Dave Mac, Rob Cushman, Neil Mac and Steve Bright The Jolly Farmers, 7 Purley Road, Purley, CR8 2HA, 020 8660 2076 www.jollyfarmers-purley.co.uk • Poker: The Alma Tavern From 6pm. The Alma Tavern, Lower Addiscombe Road, Addiscombe, East Croydon • Music: Acoustic Sundays From classical to folk, poetry to unplugged punk rock, Scream Lounge's acoustic nights guarantee you a night to remember. Most evenings are free entry, don't run late, so you won't ruin your week with a Monday hangover! 7pm start. See www.myspace.com/screamstudios or daily listings for what's on and when. Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN • Music: Sunday Jazz Lunch From midday until 4pm every Sunday, why not come down for a delicious roast dinner straight from the club’s acclaimed kitchens (not compulsory for entry but highly recommended!) and enjoy a couple of sets of laid back music from some of London’s best musicians and singers. Ronnie Scott's Jazz Club, 47 Frith Street, London W1D 4HT Box Office: 020 7439 0747 www.ronniescotts.co.uk • Sport: Roller Derby Monks Hill Sports Centre 2pm till 4pm Also croydon roller derby are taking on new skaters so anyone who's Interested please contact us at fenrisflyers@gmail.com or deathpixie666@hotmail.com • Gay: Open The Box

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What’s On - Daily Guide: Every Sunday at 7pm. The Bird In Hand, 291 Sydenham Road, Croydon, CR0 2EL. 020 8683 3104 www.birdinhand.uk.com • Sport: Brighton Dogs Every Friday lunchtime - Greyhound Racing. Doors 11am. More info from brightonandhovegreyhoundstadium. co.uk • Community: Women-Only Swimming Sessions Purley pool: Sundays 2.30-3.30pm. The cost for a non-member adult swim is £3.30 per hour. For further information on membership, activities, prices and timetables go to www.fusionlifestyle.com/contracts/Croydon_Council

............................. Sun 01 May • Event: May Day • Event: National Asparagus Month 1-31st May. Asparagusy! • Sport: Surrey v Scotland Clydesdale Bank 40 Cricket. 1.45pm. The Kia Oval, Kennington, London. More info and tickets from www.kiaoval.com • Event: Spring Ale Festival The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub • Music: Martin Speak Quartet Lunchtime Jazz with the Martin Speak Quartet, 1pm, Free! The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub • Music: In the Swing Live music from In the Swing, 4-6pm, Free! The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub • Music: The First + FranKo + Mandrage + Superking Frantic Promotions ALL AGES present. (Alternative/Rock) All-ages welcome. Under 14s must be accompanied by a paying adult No alcohol permitted in the live room DOWNSTAIRS. Doors 6pm. £5 Entry Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN, 020 8667 0155, www.screamlounge.com • Music: Bank Holiday Party Night with DJs Elmo and Dean - 1am bar The Ship, 47 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1QD, www.marstonstaverns.co.uk/Croydon/Ship • Club: Bank Holiday D’n’B GOLDIE (Metalheadz, Worldwide),

BAILEY (1xtra, Radio 1, Metalheadz), S.N.T. (Intanatty), POLEAXE (Quantum Soundz), SKOPES (Good Looking), MC FLUX (Intanatty), MC BLACKEYE Doors 8pm til late, £8 all night. Black Sheep Bar, 68 High St, CR0. 020 8680 2233. www.blacksheepbar.com www.myspace.com/blacksheepbar • Music: Singers Night Floorsingers & musicians and everybody welcome! Croydon Folk and Blues Club, Ruskin House, Coombe Road, Croydon, www.folkandblues.org

Mon 02 • Event: May Bank Bank Holiday • Event: Jack In The Green Traditional May Day celebrations in Hastings. The Jack is released from the Fishermen's Museum, from where there is a procession through the streets to Hastings Castle. Following Jack are Morris dancers, Giants and Bogies. Later in the afternoon Jack is killed, and the Spirit of Summer is released. For further information, see: www.hastingsjack.co.uk. • CHARITY: Japanese Tsunami Relief Charity gig with Clone, Camel Toe, Bleed To This plus more tbc. Japanese anime themed fancy dress, face painting, chrity sale and more tbc. Doors tbc. £tbc Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN, 020 8667 0155, www.screamlounge.com

Tue 03 • Event: National Bread Week 3-9th May. Bready!

Wed 04

• Event: National Honey Week 4-10th May. Honey-y! • Sport: Surrey v Leicestershire County Championship Cricket. 11am. The Kia Oval, Kennington, London. More info and tickets from www.kiaoval.com • Music: Sky Harbour + Rhiannon The Nightmare Wildfire Exposure Presents: Sky Harbour, Rhiannon The Nightmare plus more tbc A new monthly showcase night hosted by Wildfire Music bringing new bands to Scream. Doors 8pm. FREE ENTRY Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN, 020 8667 0155, www.screamlounge.com

Thu 05 • Music: FREE METAL NIGHT with Seed Of Detest, Eyes Of Munity, comeoutfiring. (Metal/Hardcore) plus more tbc. Doors 8pm. FREE ENTRY Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN, 020 8667 0155, www.screamlounge.com • Club: ALT. X: FREAKSHOW MONSTERS OF SCHLOCK! Special guest appearance from the world's most extreme two-man sideshow comedy magic extravaganza! Direct from Canada for one night only! Followed by Rock / Metal / Alternative with DJ Tony X plus guests. Cheap Sheep drinks deals till 10pm, plus £1.50 shots of Jager all night! £2before 10pm, doors 7pm. Black Sheep Bar, 68 High St, CR0. 020 8680 2233. www.blacksheepbar.com www.myspace.com/blacksheepbar

Fri 06 • Event: National Herb Week 6-12th May. Herby! • Sport: Turkish Grand Prix From Istanbul Park Practice one - 0800-0930; Practice two - 1200-1330 • Sport: Lingfield Races Flat horse racing - turf. Direct train from East Croydon. More info and tickets from www.lingfield-racecourse.co.uk Ladies Day at the Derby trial meeting • Music: Friday Night Showcase A new regular night showcasing the best local bands of all genres, old and new, FREE OF CHARGE this week... Gabi & The Whoremoans, Goat, Fly This For Me, 3 Day Medicene, plus more tbc. (Rock). DOWNSTAIRS Starts 8pm. FREE ENTRY Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN, 020 8667 0155, www.screamlounge.com • Music: DJ Sean The Ship, 47 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1QD, www.marstonstaverns.co.uk/Croydon/Ship

Sat 07 • Event: National Doughnut Week 7-14th May. Doughnutty! • Sport: Turkish Grand Prix From Istanbul Park Practice three - 0900-1000; Qualifying - 1200-1300 • Sport: Lingfield Races Afternoon Flat horse racing - turf. Direct train from East Croydon. More info and tickets from www.lingfieldracecourse.co.uk

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What’s On - Daily Guide: Derby trials meeting • Sport: Crystal Palace v Nottingham Forest Last game of the season. Championship football. KO 12.45pm. More info and tickets www.cpfc.co.uk • Event: Brighton Festival Sat 7 May - Sun 29 May 2011 A 3-week international festival of music, theatre, dance, literature and arts events in Brighton. See: www.brightonfestival.org and www.brightonfestivalfringe.org.uk • Music: Surrounded By Disgust + Dyscarnate + Happy Face + Once A Wolf Frantic Promotions Present: Surrounded By Disgust, Dyscarnate, Happy Face, Once A Wolf. (Extreme/prog metal) DOWNSTAIRS. Doors 8pm. £5 Entry Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN, 020 8667 0155, www.screamlounge.com • Music: PJ da DJ the best in metal, rock and alternative The Ship, 47 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1QD, www.marstonstaverns.co.uk/Croydon/Ship • Music: Robin Bibi and his Band Playing blues, funk, soul, rock, reggae and jazz all rolled together, either performing superb blues and rock ‘n’ roll covers or original material. The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, East Croydon. http://ovaltavern.co.uk • Music: Odd Box Records 2nd Birthday Bash DOORS: 3pm-2am. ADM: £8adv/£10 door. AGE LIMIT: Over 18s only Live acts: :The Lovely Eggs + The Blanche Hudson Weekend + Blood Oranges + Evans The Death + Scumbag Philosopher + The Wendy Darlings (France) + Chapter 24 + Ace Bushy Striptease + The Sweet Nothings + Bastard Sword. DJs: Owain Baaneex, Rocker (Dandelion Radio) and Paul (Scared To Dance) Genre: indiepop vs noisepop Windmill Brixton, 22 Blenheim Gardens, London SW2 5BZ. 020 8671 0700 www.windmillbrixton.co.uk

Sun 08 • Sport: Turkish Grand Prix From Istanbul Park Race - 1300 • Sport: Plumpton Races Jumps horse racing. Direct train from East Croydon. More info and tickets from www.plumptonracecourse.co.uk Family Raceday - First race 2.10pm Last meeting of the season.

• Event: Bangla New Year Festival Celebrations of Bangladeshi culture starting in the morning, when local children lead a street procession, and continuing until the end of the afternoon. It takes place in Weavers Fields (next to Vallance Road) and Allen Gardens and in the area around Brick Lane. For further details, see: www.baishakhimela.org.uk. • Event: Covent Garden May Fayre and Puppet Festival Punch and Judy shows and related events, held in the gardens of St Paul's Church, Bedford Street, London WC2 (near Covent Garden, Charing Cross or Leicester Square underground stations). At 10.30am there is a procession around the neighbourhood of Covent Garden starting at the church garden. In some years there is a Mass and Puppet Service in St Paul's Church (see: www.actorschurch.org). In the afternoon there are Punch and Judy shows, other puppet shows and workshops, folk music and dancing, clowns and jugglers (this is a free, family-friendly event). See: www.alternativearts.co.uk/events. • Music: Acoustic Sunday with Mark Woods (album launch show) plus more tbc Live in the Lounge bar Starts 7pm FREE ENTRY Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN, 020 8667 0155, www.screamlounge.com • Music: Occasional String Band & Singers Night Floorsingers & musicians and everybody welcome! Croydon Folk and Blues Club, Ruskin House, Coombe Road, Croydon, www.folkandblues.org

Mon 09 • Event: Europe Day Zut alors, Sacre Bleu etc etc. http://europa.eu • Sport: Brighton Races Flat horse racing - turf. Direct train from East Croydon. Free bus from Brighton station to the course. First Race: 2:10 PM Last Race: 5:10 PM 2 for 1 Afternoon Racing - 2for1 offer on Grandstand & Paddock admission tickets! book online at: www.brightonracecourse.co.uk

Tue 10 • Club: Rockaholic - The Return Ladies and gents the time has arrived for Rockaholic to be resurrected!!! Sick of other rock nights playing the same playlist over and over? Disenchanted by DJ's never playing your requests? Well this is the rock night where you control the music thats played!!! Free entry, good music and best of all booze, what more can you possibly ask for? ;-) Post all music requests on the rockaholic facebook page and we’ll make sure they’re lined up to be played on the night and of course we will be around all night for requests too!!! Bands: TBA Black Sheep Bar, 68 High St, CR0. 020 8680 2233. www.blacksheepbar.com www.myspace.com/blacksheepbar

Wed 11 • Club: Cane Hill Drive Thru The Ship, 47 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1QD, www.theshipcroydon.com • Comedy: Free Live Comedy night Our monthly comedy nights continue with a line-uop of top touring UK comics. Hosted by Pete K Mally UPSTAIRS Starts 8pm FREE Entry Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN, 020 8667 0155, www.screamlounge.com • Theatre: BEHIND YOU! Wednesday 11 May to Wednesday 25 May (not Saturdays) by Dave Marsden directed by Jim Dunk starring Jim McManus with Pat Abernathy and Dave Marsden Panto at Misery-on-Sea has not gone well and tonight, of all nights, a big producer is coming to see the show. Backstage, tensions rise, tempers fray, tantrums rage and tragedy makes an entrance… ’Poignant and bleakly funny, but be warned - pantomime will never be the same again' Steve Allen Show, LBC Radio 'A great play...Pacey with real pathos and relish... Seething frustrations and emotions... A great show full of insight’ 'Independent Radio 'Excellent performances... Disturbing and affecting...To contain laughter and pathos is no mean feat.... Very entertaining and only too true to life' Surrey Advertiser Tuesdays @ 6.30pm, Wednesdays, Thursdays & Fridays @ 7.30pm Sundays @ 5pm Tickets: All tickets £12 (concessions Tuesday, Wednesday & Sunday matinees £9) Thursdays all tickets £10

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What’s On - Daily Guide: Warehouse Theatre, Dingwall Road, East Croydon, 020 8680 4060 www.warehousetheatre.co.uk • Music: Midweek Music Club 9.30pm. With Nadia Baki Band (with Steve Bright) The Jolly Farmers, 7 Purley Road, Purley, CR8 2HA, 020 8660 2076 www.jollyfarmers-purley.co.uk • Music: Fairport Acoustic Convention Concert Hall. 8pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk

Thu 12 • Music: Pig Iron, Sons Of Merrick, Metasoma, Profane & The Sacred leed To This Presents (Stoner/Metal) UPSTAIRS Doors 8pm £4 Entry Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN, 020 8667 0155, www.screamlounge.com

Fri 13 • Music: Size Nine Size Nine are performing at Hot Vox's weekly residency in the Crypt of a converted church, just a 2 minute walk from Brixton Tube Station! This special event features some of the finest bands and artists on the circuit followed DJs till the early hours of the morning! This week Hot Vox are proud to present Monkey Puzzle Size Nine The Layers Angel Sparkes The Cracked £5 on the Door! 7pm Babalou, The Crypt, St Matthews Church, Brixton Hill, London, SW2 1JF • Music: DJ Dean The Ship, 47 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1QD, www.theshipcroydon.com • Music: Eureka Machines, Shush, Kitty Hudson DOWNSTAIRS (Rock/Punk/Alt) Doors 8pm £5 Entry Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN, 020 8667 0155, www.screamlounge.com • Music: Friday Night Showcase A new regular night showcasing the best local bands of all genres, old and new, FREE OF CHARGE The Janitors Splinter Group

plus more tbc DOWNSTAIRS Starts 8pm FREE ENTRY Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN, 020 8667 0155, www.screamlounge.com • Music: Bad Influence 9.30pm The Jolly Farmers, 7 Purley Road, Purley, CR8 2HA, 020 8660 2076 www.jollyfarmers-purley.co.uk • Music: Pasadena Roof Orchestra Concert Hall. 8pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk

Sat 14 • Event: Adult Learners Week www.alw.org.uk • Sport: FA Cup Final Man City v Stoke. 3pm. Wembley Stadium. Live on telly. • Event: Eurovision Song Contest From Dusseldorf. Live on BBC TV. More info from: www.bbc.co.uk/eurovision • Poetry: Poets Anonymous Saturday Poetry in the Primary Room, United Reformed Church, Addiscombe Grove, Croydon, Surrey, CR0 5LP. 2.304.00pm. £2.00. Bring your poetry to read and share. All welcome. Contact Peter for further details; peter@poetsanon.org.uk, 020 8645 9956. • Music: DJ Dean The Ship, 47 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1QD, www.theshipcroydon.com • Music: Jessi Markee Frantic Promotions Present Jessi Markee plus guests UPSTAIRS Doors tbc £tbc Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN, 020 8667 0155, www.screamlounge.com • Music: The Fuegos, Junk Time Party, Outer Audio Wildfire Promotions presents (Indie/Rock) DOWNSTAIRS Doors tbc £tbc Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN, 020 8667 0155, www.screamlounge.com • Theatre: WHOSE OSCAR IS IT ANYWAY? Saturdays 14 and 21 May only Rae Baker, Stefan Bednarczyk and Duncan Wisbey present an evening of songs, stories and soundtracks from the Golden age of Hollywood. From Charlie Chaplin, though Cary Grant 27

and right out the other side of Gracie Fields, no legend of the silver screen will escape, as your hosts dish the dirt and wash the linen of Tinseltown's finest and richest! Prepare to be amused by the anecdotes, shocked by the scandal and maybe even shed a little tear, but most of all, get ready for some classic music from Hollywood's finest era. The show will include extracts and anecdotes from the following ….---The Wizard Of Oz, -Singin’ In The Rain – Lawrence Of Arabia – Disney – Laurel and Hardy – Duck Soup – Irving Berlin – Cary Grant – Mae West – Charlie Chaplin – Judy Garland – Frank Sinatra -Randy Newman – John T Williams – Jimmy Cagney – Alfred Hitchcock – Laurence Olivier – Kirk Douglas – Gone With The Wind – High Society – and many, many more! -- STOP PRESS Now includes all new previously unheard Irving Berlin material from films that never made it! Saturdays 14 and 21 May @7.30pm all tickets £15 Warehouse Theatre, Dingwall Road, East Croydon, 020 8680 4060 www.warehousetheatre.co.uk • Music: Neil Mac Band 9.30pm The Jolly Farmers, 7 Purley Road, Purley, CR8 2HA, 020 8660 2076 www.jollyfarmers-purley.co.uk • Music: Bad Influence Bad Influence is described as a “Rock and Blues” band and that is where they sit quite comfortably. However, this band has many musical influences and it shows in just about every song they perform.. The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, East Croydon. http://ovaltavern.co.uk. • Gay: Eurovision Party 7pm-1am The Bird In Hand, 291 Sydenham Road, Croydon, CR0 2EL. 020 8683 3104 www.birdinhand.uk.com • Music: London Mozart Players Fairfield Orchestral Series 2010/2011 Concert Hall. 7.30pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk

Sun 15 • Music: Live Jazz Live lunchtime jazz from 1pm. FREE. With ANDY PANAYI Sax & Flute JIM MULLEN Guitar SIMON WOOLF Bass WINSTON CLIFFORD Drums

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What’s On - Daily Guide: Great band (Jazz News) The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub www.jazznet.co.uk • Event: Judy’s Affordable Vintage Fair - Brighton The marketplace curator of last summer's smash hit 'Vintage at Goodwood' will be bringing 60 of the finest Goodwood traders to Brighton Racecourse. Set to be Brighton's largest and most affordable Vintage Fashion Fair. Over 60 stalls of genuine vintage bargains, with traders travelling in from around the UK with stock spanning six decades, Judy advises the public to "expect the eclectic." Former Selfridges personal shopper, entrepreneur and stylist, Judy Berger promises a fair to cater for all tastes, bringing everything from old-school getups, antiques, fabrics, haberdashery and even a 1940s tea party. Venue: Brighton Racecourse Phone: 01273 603580 More Details: http://www.vintagefair.co.uk or www.brighton-racecourse.co.uk • Music: Acoustic Sunday Jam Night Come along and join in! plus open mic Live in the Lounge bar from 7pm FREE ENTRYScream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN, 020 8667 0155, www.screamlounge.com • Music: Open Mic Night 9pm The Jolly Farmers, 7 Purley Road, Purley, CR8 2HA, 020 8660 2076 www.jollyfarmers-purley.co.uk • Music: Bad Influence Steve Morrison’s Blues Abuse. From 5pm. FREE! The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, East Croydon. http://ovaltavern.co.uk. • Theatre: Me, Marley & I Ashcroft Theatre. 7.450pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk

Mon 16 • Event: National Watercress Week 16-22nd May. Watercressy! • Event: British Sandwich Week 16-21st May. Sandwichy! • Music: Dave Gibb £7 (mems £5) 8pm. Croydon Folk and Blues Club, Ruskin House, Coombe Road, Croydon, www.croydonfolkclub.org.uk • Film: Now Voyager Films at the Fairfield - Classic Matinees. 2.30pm. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk

Tue 17 • Sport: Brighton Races Flat horse racing - turf. Direct train from East Croydon. Free bus from Brighton station to the course. First Race: 2:20 PM Last Race: 4:50 PM 2 for 1 Afternoon Racing - 2for1 offer on Grandstand & Paddock admission tickets! book online at: www.brighton-racecourse.co.uk • History: Bread, gruel & dumplings - Life in the workhouse A talk by Ian Waller. Ian is a professional genealogist and archive researcher, a member of AGRA with 30 years experience in English research. East Surrey Family History Society Meetings on 3rd Tuesday of the month at 8pm in the small hall. Hall opens 7.30pm. East Croydon United Reformed Church, Addiscombe Grove, Croydon CR0 5LP • Music: Freedom of Expression featuring Andi McBurnie, Fred Rosin + open mic, 8pm, Free! The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub • Music: Angela Brownridge in Concert - Lunchtime Concert Concert Hall. 1.05pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk • Theatre: Hamlet Ashcroft Theatre. 7.45pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk

• Music: Zeus + My Sad Captains + Delta/Alaska DOORS: 8pm ADM: £6adv/£7door AGE LIMIT: Over 18s only Live acts: Zeus + My Sad Captains + Delta/Alaska Genre: alternative/indie/rock Windmill Brixton, 22 Blenheim Gardens, London SW2 5BZ. 020 8671 0700 www.windmillbrixton.co.uk

Wed 18 • Sport: Lingfield Races Afternoon Flat horse racing - turf. Direct train from East Croydon. More info and tickets from www.lingfield-racecourse.co.uk • Sport: Surrey v Essex County Cricket. 18th-21st May. Part of Whitgift Festival of Cricket. 11am. Whitgift School, Brighton Road, South Croydon. Tickets and info from www.kiaoval.com • Music: Mavericks, The Last Legion SCREAM ALL AGES PRESENTS Mavericks The Last Legion plus more tbc All-ages welcome Under 14s must be accompanied by a paying adult No alcohol permitted in the live room DOWNSTAIRS 7pm - 10pm £4 entry Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN, 020 8667 0155, www.screamlounge.com • Music: Ragged Company 9.30pm The Jolly Farmers, 7 Purley Road, Purley, CR8 2HA, 020 8660 2076 www.jollyfarmers-purley.co.uk • Comedy: Micky Flanagan Concert Hall. 8pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk • Theatre: Hamlet Ashcroft Theatre. 2.30pm and 7.45pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk

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What’s On - Daily Guide: • Music: Artmagic’s debut EP launch party DOORS: 7.30pm ADM: £5adv AGE LIMIT: Over 18s only Event: Artmagic’s debut EP launch party Live acts: Artmagic + The Gadsdens + Andrew Montgomery Genre: indie Windmill Brixton, 22 Blenheim Gardens, London SW2 5BZ. 020 8671 0700 www.windmillbrixton.co.uk

Thu 19 • Music: Snowboy The launch night of the new STAND! Monthly music night at Fairfield featuring Snowboy & the Latin Section plus support Fowokan featuring two members of of the legendary Cymande playing funky roots reggae. Tickets £15, Doors 7pm. Arnhem Gallery, Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon www.standatfairfield.co.uk www.fairfield.co.uk www.onetreemusic.co.uk • Music: Rock of Ages The Ship is proud to welcome back Cartoon regulars Rock of Ages for an unbeatable night of classic rock covers. Playing Led Zeppelin, Deep Purple, AC/DC, Black Sabbath and many more. 8pm-11pm The Ship, 47 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1QD, www.theshipcroydon.com • Music: IT, The Spinlords plus guests (Prog influenced rock) UPSTAIRS Doors 8pm FREE ENTRY Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN, 020 8667 0155, www.screamlounge.com • Music: Tokyo Toys (Rock Covers) DOWNSTAIRS Doors 8pm FREE ENTRY Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN, 020 8667 0155, www.screamlounge.com • Music: Hurray For The Riff Raff + The Blazing Zoos + Music of Seville DOORS: 8pm ADM: £5adv AGE LIMIT: Over 18s only Live acts: Hurray For The Riff Raff + The Blazing Zoos + Music of Seville Genre: folk/country/rocknroll Windmill Brixton, 22 Blenheim Gardens, London SW2 5BZ. 020 8671 0700 www.windmillbrixton.co.uk

• Burlesque: Double R Club This month's deranged dream-like and terrible anomalies include: Bad to the bone roadhouse strumpet KIKI KABOOM! The mysterious and iconic MISS ANNABEL SINGS! The nudity and intrigue of ERNESTO SAREZALE! The voice of your dreams GRACIE! The sick and amphibious TAILCOAT CABARET! The sultry seductress EMERALD FONTAINE! Maniacal musical malefactor ANDREW BAILEY! p l u s SPECIAL GUESTS! The Double R Club Bethnal Green Working Men's Club http://www.wegottickets.com/event/1180 87 www.thedoublerclub.co.uk

Fri 20 • Event: Pick Strawberries Day Strawberryey! • Sport: Spanish Grand Prix From Circuit de Catalunya Practice one - 0900-1030; Practice two - 1300-1430 • Music: Doctors and Nurses with Dr Smutglove Get ready for a night of punked up classic hits with those dastardly doctors of decadence Dr. Smutglove. Of course, it's a dress-up night so come on all you doctors of death, naughty nurses, strict matrons and mad scientists. As usual they'll be bashing out loads of hits from the likes of Green Day, The Ramones, Boomtown Rats, Arctic Monkeys, Sex Pistols, Ash, Beastie Boys, Blondie, the Stranglers, the Cure and the Clash. And if you're very lucky, Pete will wear his lovely PVC number again. 8pm-11pm. FREE! The Ship, 47 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1QD, www.theshipcroydon.com • Music: Fineprint Audio, Million Way, Technicolore Gob Presents Live bands playing Drum & Bass, Dub, Breaks and Electronica, plus DJ set augmented with live keys & percussion Doors 8pm FREE ENTRY Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN, 020 8667 0155, www.screamlounge.com • Music: Stone Free (Rock/Pop originals) Doors tbc £tbc Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN, 020 8667 0155, www.screamlounge.com 30

• Music: Stolen ID 9.30pm The Jolly Farmers, 7 Purley Road, Purley, CR8 2HA, 020 8660 2076 www.jollyfarmers-purley.co.uk • Comedy: Croydon Comedy Club 9pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk • Sport: Superslam Wrestling Concert Hall. 7.30pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk • Music: Two Kinds Of Magic Queen & ELO tribute. Ashcroft Theatre. 7.45pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk

Sat 21 • Sport: Lingfield Races Evening Flat horse racing - turf. Direct train from East Croydon. More info and tickets from www.lingfield-racecourse.co.uk Our first evening meeting of the summer is always well supported. Join us for a full programme of races over both the turf and all-weather courses. • Sport: Spanish Grand Prix From Circuit de Catalunya Practice three - 1000-1100; Qualifying: 1300-1400 • Music: PJ da DJ the best in metal, rock and alternative The Ship, 47 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1QD, www.theshipcroydon.com • Music: The Surfin Wombats, Screamin Sugar Skulls, Johnny & The Death Rays Rocket From Croydonia presents: Another night of psychobily, garage surf & punk! Doors 8pm £3 Entry Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN, 020 8667 0155, www.screamlounge.com • Theatre: WHOSE OSCAR IS IT ANYWAY? See 14 May Saturdays 14 and 21 May @7.30pm all tickets £15 Warehouse Theatre, Dingwall Road, East Croydon, 020 8680 4060 www.warehousetheatre.co.uk

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What’s On - Daily Guide: • Music: Mojohand 9.30pm The Jolly Farmers, 7 Purley Road, Purley, CR8 2HA, 020 8660 2076 www.jollyfarmers-purley.co.uk • Music: Wig Out The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, East Croydon. http://ovaltavern.co.uk. • Music: The British Pink Floyd Concert Hall. 8pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk • Music: The Fureys and Davey Arthur Ashcroft Theatre. 7.45pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk

Sun 22 • Sport: Surrey v Hampshire Clydesdale Bank 40 Cricket. Part of Whitgift Festival of Cricket. 1.45pm. Whitgift School, Brighton Road, South Croydon. Tickets and info from www.kiaoval.com • Sport: Spanish Grand Prix From Circuit de Catalunya Race - 1300 • Music: RENATO D'AIELLO Quartet Live lunchtime jazz from 1pm. FREE. Upstairs. The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub www.jazznet.co.uk • Comedy: Andy Parsons Ashcroft Theatre. 8pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk • Club: Croydon Roller Derby Fundraiser Bringing you an evening of mayhem with the lovely ladies of Croydon Roller Derby. With live music from DEVIL COCKS , WONK UNIT and THE LOST AUDIO plus special guests. Watch the girls slog it out in an epic JELLY WRESTLING battle, YOU can take on the girls in a TWISTER TORNAMENT as well as other fun and games. Plus you can win some drinks and booty in our raffle with prizes from TIMEBOMB, STARGAZER and STEEL

POINT TATTOOS. CHEAP SHEEP drinks deals 6-8pm. £1.50 pints, £1.50 spirit mixers, £1 shots, £2.50 vodka Red Bull. £1.50 Jager shots ALL NIGHT Tasty cupcakes (nom nom) Skate demo from the CRD girls Screening of the latest CRD promo video Plus some rather yummy merch for sale £3 entry Doors 6pm-2am Non members bring ID Black Sheep Bar, 68 High St, CR0. 020 8680 2233. www.blacksheepbar.com www.myspace.com/blacksheepbar • Music: Kris Dollimore Live blues. 5pm. FREE! The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, East Croydon. http://ovaltavern.co.uk. • Music: Jane McDonald in concert Concert Hall. 8pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk • Music: The Twisted AM Lounge Country Barndance & BBQ DOORS: 5pm ADM: £5 (inc free BBQ) AGE LIMIT: Over 18s only Event: The Twisted AM Lounge Country Barndance & BBQ Live acts: Cheyne Pride + Suzette & The Neon Angels (USA) + The Jolenes + Jenny Cash & The Sons Of Sue + Country Dirt + Kathleen Haskard DJs: Twisted AM Lounge Genre: Country/Twang Windmill Brixton, 22 Blenheim Gardens, London SW2 5BZ. 020 8671 0700 www.windmillbrixton.co.uk

Mon 23 • Event: National Vegetarian Week 23-29th May. Vegeyeyey! • Music: Singers and Musicians Night No need to book, just come along and sing or play, or just watch. Only £3. Croydon Folk and Blues Club, Ruskin House, Coombe Road, Croydon, www.croydonfolkclub.org.uk • Film: Mildred Pierce Films at the Fairfield - Classic Matinees. 2.30pm. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk

• Craft: The Jane Austen Book Club (KNIT & SEW) From 6.30pm (drop in when you like). FREE! The first rule of the Jane Austin Book Club is there is no Book Club. It’s part of a growing number of feisty but friendly knitting and sewing groups taking over the world one stitch at a time. Everyone is welcome. Wallflowers, vixens, vikings, mild-mannered librarians or superheroes. Bring some knitting or sewing and remember our most important rule – relax and unwind (whether it is with a drink or a ball of wool) and make new friends. For other groups in London check out www.stitchnbitch.org The Spreadeagle, Katharine Street, Croydon • Music: Frontier Ruckus + My First Tooth + Deer Park DOORS: 8pm ADM: £7 AGE LIMIT: Over 18s only Live acts: Frontier Ruckus + My First Tooth + Deer Park Genre: folk/indie Windmill Brixton, 22 Blenheim Gardens, London SW2 5BZ. 020 8671 0700 www.windmillbrixton.co.uk

Tue 24 • Event: European Day of Parks Get out in the fresh air for a bit. www.europarc.org • Event: Chelsea Flower Show 24-28 May. Royal Hospital, Chelsea, London. More info, tickets etc from www.rhs.org.uk • Sport: Lingfield Races Afternoon Flat horse racing - turf / AW. Direct train from East Croydon. More info and tickets from www.lingfield-racecourse.co.uk • Sport: Rep. Ireland v N. Ireland Carling Nations Cup football. 7.45pm. • Music: Freedom of Expression featuring The Blowpipes, General Paulus, Tom Janssen, 8pm, Free! The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub • Music: Django a la Creole Concert Hall. 8pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk

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What’s On - Daily Guide: • Theatre: Remember When 50s nostalgic musical. Ashcroft Theatre. 2.30pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk

Wed 25 • Sport: Wales v Scotland Carling Nations Cup football. KO tbc • Event: Towel Day Towel Day is an annual celebration on the 25th of May, as a tribute to the late author Douglas Adams (1952-2001). On that day, fans around the universe proudly carry a towel in his honour. The Deep-Massive will be embarking on its now annual towel day celebratory pub crawl, with our towels, naturally, and will be handing out packets of peanuts to anyone else we see wearing one... www.towelday.org • Event: Vogon Poetry Slam In honour of Douglas Adams & Towel Day. There will be two categories: • Nerdcore – poetry on a scientific/geeky/nerdy subject • So-Bad-It’s-Good – rubbish rhymes, angsty subjects, etc. There will also be: * The most bureaucratic voting system we can devise * Pan-galactic gargle blasters to drink * Judges writhing in agony * Some damn snazzy costumes £5 on the door (£3 if you’re in costume or have your towel with you). From 7pm at The Miller Pub, near London Bridge. More details from www.whippersnapperpress.com. • Music: Splinter Group The Ship, 47 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1QD, www.theshipcroydon.com • Music: Open Your Skull IX featuring: Spastic Burn Victim, Sloppy Seconds, R.S.Seizure, g0ren|dal (Noise/Experimental/Electronica) Doors 8pm £3 Entry Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN, 020 8667 0155, www.screamlounge.com • Music: Royal Philharmonic Orchestra Fairfield Orchestral Series 2010/2011 Concert Hall. 7.30pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk

Thu 26 • Sport: Brighton Races Flat horse racing - turf. Direct train from East Croydon. Free bus from Brighton station to the course. First Race: 2:10 PM Last Race: 5:10 PM Book online at: www.brighton-racecourse.co.uk • Sport: England v Sri Lanka 26-30th May. Cricket. First Test Match England v Sri Lanka, Cardiff, 11:00 • Quiz: The Croham A new quiz night from Wendy’s Wonderful Quiz at The Dragon fame. From 8pm. Teams of up to 6 and £1.50 entry per person. Last Thursday of every month. The Croham Arms, Croham Road, South Croydon • Music: Surfaces, Charon, Foundations, The Divided, We Lie Beneath Saviour Management Presents (Metalcore) 7.30pm Doors £5 Entry Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN, 020 8667 0155, www.screamlounge.com • Music: Jools Holland and his Rhythm & Blues Orchestra Feat. Gilson Lavis, Ruby Turner & Louise Marshall Concert Hall. 8pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk • Theatre: Abigail’s Party CODA adaptation of the classic Mike Leigh play. Ashcroft Theatre. 2.30pm & 7.45pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk

Fri 27 • Sport: Brighton Races Flat horse racing - turf. Direct train from East Croydon. Free bus from Brighton station to the course. First Race: 2:10 PM Last Race: 5:40 PM Book online at: www.brighton-racecourse.co.uk • Sport: Monaco Grand Prix From Monte Carlo Practice one - 0900-1030; Practice two - 1300-1430 • Sport: Wales v N. Ireland Carling Nations Cup football. 7.45pm. 32

• Music: DJ Sean The Ship, 47 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1QD, www.theshipcroydon.com • Music: Friday Night Showcase A regular night showcasing the best local bands of all genres, old and new, FREE OF CHARGE this week... Tsars, The Perfect Crime (Indie/Prog) UPSTAIRS Starts 8pm FREE ENTRY Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN, 020 8667 0155, www.screamlounge.com • Music: I Want You - Barb Jungr sings Bob Dylan Concert Hall. 8pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk • Theatre: Abigail’s Party CODA adaptation of the classic Mike Leigh play. Ashcroft Theatre. 7.45pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk

Sat 28 • Sport: UEFA Champions League Final Man U v Real Madrid from Wembley. More infor from www.uefa.com • Sport: Monaco Grand Prix From Monte Carlo Practice three - 1000-1100; Qualifying - 1300-1400 • CHARITY: Charity Band Night at St Christopher’s Hospice LOST IN SPACE & 2 OTHER LIVE BANDS PLUSS DJ'S PLUSS A RAFFLE WITH BUNGIE JUMP PRIZE. 7.30pm - 10.30pm The Crooked Billet, High Street Penge Penge SE20 • Music: DJ Dean The Ship, 47 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1QD, www.theshipcroydon.com • Music: Mentallica The UK's premiere Metallica tribute band. Sheer metal awesomeness! DOWNSTAIRS Doors 8pm £7 advance Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN, 020 8667 0155, www.screamlounge.com

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What’s On - Daily Guide: • Music: Rock Of Ages 9.30pm The Jolly Farmers, 7 Purley Road, Purley, CR8 2HA, 020 8660 2076 www.jollyfarmers-purley.co.uk • Music: Secret Urge Live music. 8pm. The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, East Croydon. http://ovaltavern.co.uk. • Music: One Night of Queen Concert Hall. 8pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk • Theatre: Abigail’s Party CODA adaptation of the classic Mike Leigh play. Ashcroft Theatre. 2.30pm & 7.45pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk

Sun 29 • Sport: Monaco Grand Prix From Monte Carlo Race - 1300 • Music: Live Jazz Live lunchtime jazz from 1pm. FREE. With BOB SYDOR Sax GEOFF CASTLE Keyboards ROB STATHAM Bass LLOYD RYAN Drums Innovative quartet The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub www.jazznet.co.uk • Music: Homebrood Join us on Bank Holiday Sunday for an acoustic & eclectic night of old and new rock, funk, soul and folk music, remixed and performed in 'Homebrood" style Entry is free and the atmosphere is great, so don't miss out! From 4pm. FREE! Half & Half Lounge Bar 282 High Street Croydon, United Kingdom • Event: Shagwell High Spring Term School Disco What? School on a Sunday? It was never like that in my day (unless you were forced into going to Sunday School). Well, we've gone one better and cancelled lessons on Monday so you can come out and party at our annual School Disco on Bank Holiday Sunday. So dress to impress - sexy schoolgirls, naughty schoolboys, strict headmasters, prefects, school nurses,

dinner ladies, gym teachers .... or anything else you can think of. Vee and Ziggy are in charge of the music room and the refectory's open until 2am. Don't worry if you have to stay late - you don't have to get up in the morning. 8pm-2am. The Ship, 47 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1QD, www.theshipcroydon.com • Music: Croydon Drumfest An all-day long event featuring drum workshops from top names including Ralph Salmins, Dan Foord, Chris Barron, Sam Dunthorne, plus live sets from Los, Tilt At Windmills and more DOWNSTAIRS Doors 1pm £12 advance Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN, 020 8667 0155, www.screamlounge.com • Club: Emissions HARD DANCE, featuring J IMPACT, SACHIN, LATEX ZEBRA, PAPA SMURF, BSE, DJ LP, THE TECHNICIAN, HAPPY JACK. Doors 8pm-4am, £5 adv, £6 on the door. Black Sheep Bar, 68 High St, CR0. 020 8680 2233. www.blacksheepbar.com www.myspace.com/blacksheepbar • Theatre: Love, Sax and All That Jazz Smash hit gospel comedy play. Ashcroft Theatre. 7.30pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk

Mon 30 • Event: Bank Holiday! Last one ‘til August so make the most of it! • Sport: London 10k Run The Bupa London 10,000 is presented by the London Marathon and is run on the course likely to be used for the 2012 Olympic Marathons. The 2011 race will be held on 30th May, starting at 11am. More info and route etc from www.london10000.co.uk • Event: Bank Holiday Market Brighton Brighton market has over 500 market stalls every Bank Holiday Monday at Brighton Racecourse for your perusal from fashion to food. Brighton Bank Holiday market has everything you need and has been firmly established as the South Coast's premier outdoor Bank Holiday event. Venue: Brighton Racecourse More Details: www.townandcountrymarkets.co.uk or www.brighton-racecourse.co.uk 33

• Event: National BBQ Week 30th May - 5th June. BBQey! www.nationalbbqweek.co.uk • Kids: How The Koala Learnt To Hug How did the koala learn to hug? I need to know! Ashcroft Theatre. 2.30pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk • Music: Art Brut 7.30pm adv £11. The Lexington 96-98 Pentonville Road London N1 9JB 020 7837 5371 www.thelexington.co.uk

Tue 31 • Music: QUENTIN COLLINS QUARTET Live lunchtime jazz from 1pm. FREE. The Green Dragon, 58-60 High Street, Croydon, CRO 1NA www.myspace.com/greendragonpub www.jazznet.co.uk • Film: Breakfast at Tiffany’s Films at the Fairfield - Classic Matinees. 2.30pm. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk • Music: Art Brut 7.30pm adv £11. The Lexington 96-98 Pentonville Road London N1 9JB 020 7837 5371 www.thelexington.co.uk

Wed 01 June 2011 • Music: Brightlight City, Killing Vegas, Simon Knight Wildfire Exposure presents A new monthly showcase night hosted by Wildfire Music bringing new bands to Scream featuring Brightlight City, Killing Vegas, Simon Knight UPSTAIRS Doors 8pm FREE ENTRY Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN, 020 8667 0155, www.screamlounge.com • Event: National Volunteers Week 1-7th June. Volunteers’ Week is an annual event which celebrates the fantastic contribution that millions of volunteers make across the UK. The Week plays a huge part in raising the profile of the

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What’s On - Daily Guide: millions of volunteers who regularly contribute to society, while inspiring others to get involved too. More info: www.volunteersweek.org.uk • Club: Reel Music London's No.1 Movie Soundtrack Club Night. It's the Summer time... it's Blockbuster season... and it's time to leave your seven evil exes behind (chances are they'll follow you anyway) and join us for an epic soundtrack night of epic soundtrackness... REEL MUSIC VS THE WORLD!... Joining us for our Scott Pilgrim themed extravaganza will be the brilliant Osymyso - who of course not only lent his musical talents to SPACED, SHAUN OF THE DEAD and HOT FUZZ, but also the 5 remix videos prior to the release of SCOTT PILGRIM VS THE WORLD last Summer. In addition we will be doing our own little music video tribute to the movies of Mr. Edgar Wright, and we've got a few more surprises up our sleeve between now and July so stayed tuned! We will be doing the usual Oscar hand outs for Best Male & Female Cinema themed costumes - but will also have some cool Scott Pilgrim swag for those in the best Scott Pilgrim get up. We want to gather as many of the different characters on the night as possible. So get creative! REEL MUSIC is a 6 hour soundtrack spectacular. From the obscure to the sing-a-long classic, we have it covered. REEL MUSIC is the perfect opportunity to get dressed up, hang out with your friends in an amazing venue and do something different. 8pm-3am. Bloomsbury Bowling Lanes Basement of the Tavistock Hotel, Bedford Way, Tavistock Square, WC1H 9EU London. • Theatre: Peter Pan On Ice Concert Hall. 7.30pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk • Music: Art Brut 7.30pm adv £11. The Lexington 96-98 Pentonville Road London N1 9JB 020 7837 5371 www.thelexington.co.uk

Thu 02 • Sport: Lingfield Races Afternoon Flat horse racing - turf / AW. Direct train from East Croydon. More info and tickets from www.lingfield-racecourse.co.uk

• Event: Wine Tasting Evening Wish to learn and taste a variety of wines from around the world? Experience our wine tasting evening and learn from our expert. Tickets cost £15PP includes tasting a selection of 8-10 wines with a light snack! Spaces are limited so book early to avoid disappointment! 7.30pm-10.30pm Half & Half Lounge Bar 282 High Street Croydon, United Kingdom • Music: Blasphemy Nights present bands tba A new monthly night highlighting the best in extreme metal. Doors tbc £tbc Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN, 020 8667 0155, www.screamlounge.com • Theatre: Peter Pan On Ice Concert Hall. 2.30pm & 7.30pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk • Music: Art Brut 7.30pm adv £11. The Lexington, 96-98 Pentonville Road London N1 9JB. 020 7837 5371 www.thelexington.co.uk

Fri 03 • Sport: Investec Derby Festival Ladies Day / The Oaks. Live on TV. Epsom Downs Racecourse, Epsom, Surrey. More info & tickets from www.epsomderby.co.uk • Sport: England v Sri Lanka 3-7th June. Cricket. Second Test Match. England v Sri Lanka, Lord's, 11:00 • Music: DJ Sean The Ship, 47 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1QD, www.theshipcroydon.com • Music: Friday Night Showcase A new regular night showcasing the best local bands of all genres, old and new, FREE OF CHARGE this week... The Jonbarr Hinge, Free Swim, Electric Trees (Alternative/Indie) UPSTAIRS Starts 8pm FREE ENTRY Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN, 020 8667 0155, www.screamlounge.com • Music: Tidor, Karn8, Run Leia Run Wildfire Music Presents Doors 8pm £tbc Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN, 020 8667 0155, www.screamlounge.com 34

• Music: Jinn House 9.30pm The Jolly Farmers, 7 Purley Road, Purley, CR8 2HA, 020 8660 2076 www.jollyfarmers-purley.co.uk • Theatre: Peter Pan On Ice Concert Hall. 2.30pm & 7.30pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk • Cabaret: Sacre Bleu Comedy, music, magic, improv, speciality acts, surprises! Fairfield Foyer / Bar. 8pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk • Music: Art Brut 7.30pm adv £11. The Lexington, 96-98 Pentonville Road London N1 9JB. 020 7837 5371 www.thelexington.co.uk

Sat 04 • Sport: Investec Derby Festival Derby Day. Live on TV. Epsom Downs Racecourse, Epsom, Surrey. More info & tickets from www.epsomderby.co.uk • Sport: England v Switzerland European Championship Qualifying football. 4.45pm. • Music: DJ Freeqboi The Ship, 47 High Street, Croydon, CR0 1QD, www.theshipcroydon.com • Music: Exmore, Mordecai, Dangerous Breed Frantic Promotions present (Metal) DOWNSTAIRS Doors 8pm £5 Scream Lounge, 20 South End, Croydon, CR0 1DN, 020 8667 0155, www.screamlounge.com • Music: Bizarre 9.30pm The Jolly Farmers, 7 Purley Road, Purley, CR8 2HA, 020 8660 2076 www.jollyfarmers-purley.co.uk • Music: The Ashtones Live music. 8pm. The Oval Tavern, 131 Oval Road, East Croydon. http://ovaltavern.co.uk. • Theatre: Peter Pan On Ice Concert Hall. 2.30pm & 7.30pm. For more info please call the box office or visit the website. Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, CR9 1DG. Box Office: 020 8688 9291 www.fairfield.co.uk

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(1) The King and Queen pub in Caterham, getting into the spirit of the thing (pic: Wendy Freer); (2) Alternative wedding dress (pic: Sheila Andrews); (3) Behind the mask is Sydney Walls who we met, with her mum Margherita, totally randomly outside a pub while on holiday - we’d gone from London to Brighton to get away from it all, they’d gone the other way to be at the the wedding, and they had marvellous day by all accounts. Nice one and nice to meet you! (4) Princess Tubb, looking resplendent that William’s a lucky, lucky man...; (5) A most civilised Royal Wedding Hangover Party at The Glamorgan (pic: Tony Ferrara); (6) St George’s Day in Surrey Street, with the Mayor of Croydon giving morris dancing a bash (pic: Fiona Woodcock); (7 & 8) Junction Road street party (pix: Tony Ferrara); 1

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