APM Issue 13

APM

SHE LEAVES A LITTLE SPARKLE WHEREVER SHE GOES ISSUE 13

Putting the Human Into HR BIG DATA HR INTEGRATION IS HERE ..

Why you should Never start a diet ON A MONDAY !

IT IS TIME FOR YOU TO GET THE MOTIVATION TO START NOW

Spring Soul Food Judgement sits within The meaning we apply WHERE DOES A PEACEFUL MIND COME FROM

Our apm writ ers From the editor…

L

aurenwhere Jobson you can get up Welcome to our SPRING edition of This is a place Hello our wonderful APM Ladies. I Life close personal with women who are APM magazine.

Coachand tip s and techniques cannot believe how quickly this year is to mov youto doing incredible things. to w ar ds your goals inYou caneget

flying by. lif e a spotlight Spring is such a great time. You can know them better as we shine and their business. YOU will feel the fresh air, the smell of new flow- on them Hay ley Martin As and a new brings new beginnings to their sucers allyear those gorgeous new baby learn what has contributed Nutrit and changes, when we approach the iona l adviand cess wecipe give TIPS how you ce, re birds coming into the world. s &you wellness on ar ticle s toso half way point we can begin to reflect on elevate yoyour can embrace self ur heempowered alth them.

We can evaluate the goals we So what is your plan for SPRING? A you can live the best life you possibly can. aimed to achieve and establish Maree Eddings new wardrobe perhaps?

A new new garsteps to take.

I challenge youEx allplto This edition we spotlight SUZI PETROZden? A new do? New routines? oring energy and ZI. Be sure ho towcheck SUZI has a it flowits out, revaluate your goals. Decide whether or or bloc ks yo ur pe rs on al po some wer wonderful wisdom Spring clean is a great wayare to on getthe startnot you achieved them, waygreat story and ed, de-cluttering to, orand need a new goal.is an excellent to share with you.

Helen Treloar way to shake off the winter blues and have someone who INSPIRES you?

Bu get spring in yourall step (see sine talking Thisthat month weback are things ss &Do Lead ership tips & artic les for SMWOMEN our INSPIRING what I did there!)

E& winter.

Many of us struggle with the We are opening start-ups challenge and we want to hear from you. winter the fight to get out ofI Hellocold our and wonderful APM Ladies.

Each month we are going to AWARD Spring is a great time to try new things

bed in thebelieve morning.

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We can the goals anow INSPIRATIONAL and AVRIL CARPENTER have allweknowledge as sales and clientwomthis month, as we have some exciting lo ya lty aimed achieve and establish joined ourtogroup of experts who will new be an, please nominate her on our Facebook news, and changes happening. sharing their expertise both here stepsevents to take.

I challenge youinallthe to page.

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Kind, Courageous and Confident, Many of us struggle Stylewith yourthe warknowledge drobe & your and spread the so help We will notice a new SPOTLIGHT on lif Taylah Parker e us in g Becklove winter cold and the fight to get out se of crets & ie’s suggestions women in business as well.

Editor bed in the morning. So we all need that

From the editor…

one thing. Something that makes us Julie B ourke jump out of bed to start the day. Bring Technology is in back the excitement and think about everyone’s life! Julie help s you use it and protec what it is for you. t it well

Joanne Clark Finally keep your eyes and ears peeled this month, as we haveBrsome exciting inging you NLP Success Principl es through news, events and changes happening.

‘Women in H isto ry’ pieces You will not want to miss it. Subscribe to our newsletters and Facebook page to keep update to date with everythingPippa Han son APM. Be inspired by Pi ppa’s personal jo urney as a business owner, mother and wife Be Kind, Courageous and Confident, Taylah Parker Suzi Petrozzi Editor Her dedication to personal develo pment inspires he to keep growing an d living a present, purposeful an r d powerful life.

us out with some inspirational stories of those that you know and are inspired by.

a cuppa or a wine Please sit back with and enjoy this month’s edition. As usual our experts have turned it on and providing you with some great information and advice to help you live with a PEACEFUL MIND.

ADVERTISE WITH US

Love and Light Interested in advertising with us, email Maree APM at maree@backtome.com And we can send you an advertising package

WRITE FOR US Would you love to be a guest writer for APM? We are always looking for fabulous content that is suitable for Women that Educates ~ Inspires ~ Informs and grows our knowledge and choices.

ENGAGE WITH US US ADVERTISE WITH Interested in advertising with us, email APM at maree@backtome.com And we can send you an advertising package

HELP USWRITE TO HELP FOROTHERS US Would you love to be a guest writer for APM? We are always looking for fabulous content that is suitable for Women that Educates ~ Inspires ~ Informs and grows our knowledge and choices.

ENGAGE WITH US

HELP US TO HELP OTHERS

A Peaceful Mind ⏐ ISSUE 13

CONTENTS

6 APM Women in Business

SUZI PETROZZI SPOTLIGHT

Issue 13 018

8 Think you might be Energy Sensitive?

MAREE EDDINGS ENERGY

10 Putting the Human into HR

helen treloar BUSINESS

12 How to Be More Organized

014

book revIew LENA TURBEY

14 Never Start A Diet on a Monday

AVRIL CARPENTER WEIGHT PSYCHOLOGY

16 What do you Make no Mean?

pENNY VOTZOURAKIS CUSTOMER SERVICE 18 APM Spring Travel

Spring ADVENTURES

A PEACEFUL MIND

032

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A Peaceful Mind ⏐ ISSUE 13

20 Spring Recipe

Hayley Martin

TRUE FORM HEALTH 23 10 MUST HAVES FOR THIS MONTH

034

a p e a c e f u l m I nd

YOU 24 Believing In Yourself

joanne clark

023

NLP 28 The Power of YouTube

JULIE BOURKE

TECHNOLOGY 32 Are You Drawn to the Shiny Red Apple?

PIPPA HANSON

A PERSONAL JOURNEY

038

020

34 Be the Leader You Were Born to Be!

LISA WIKING

MOTIVATIONAL LEADERSHIP 38 Judgement Sits Within the Meaning We Apply

SOUL FOOD

HELEN TRELOAR

024

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Our apm writers

Lisa Wiking

A leadership expert, speaker and published author.

Hayley Martin Nutritional advice, recipes & wellness articles to elevate your health

Maree Eddings Exploring energy and how it flows or blocks your personal power

Helen Treloar Business & Leadership tips & articles for SME & start-ups

Avril Carpenter Are you ready to make peace with food and live the delicious life your soul is craving? specialises in the psychology behind weight issues.

Penny Votzourakis Customer service advice to grow sales and client loyalty

Lena Turvey Productivity and organisation queen bringing you tips and techniques

Beckie White Style your wardrobe & your life using Beckie’s secrets & suggestions

Julie Bourke Technology is in everyone’s life! Julie helps you use it and protect it well

Joanne Clark Bringing you NLP Success Principles through ‘Women in History’ pieces

Pippa Hanson Be inspired by Pippa’s personal journey as a business owner, mother and wife

Suzi Petrozzi Her dedication to personal development inspires her to keep growing and living a present, purposeful and powerful life.

She leaves a little

Sparkle wherever

she goes

This month we are shining the spotlight on Suzi Petrozzi (www.suzipetrozzi.com), Wellness psychologist and Women’s Empowerment Coach. After being in her own business for 9 years, Suzi’s philosophy which works with her clients as well as her own life is …

Add love into the mix, like even the most serious business meeting, and you’ll experience something beyond your expectation…beyond what you thought was possible.

Suzi works with professional women who feel weighed down by pressure and overwhelm and help them remove emotional barriers so they can get crystal clear on what they want their life to be, and have the confidence to start living the life they want and deserve.

What was the main driver that compelled you to start your own business?

APM Women IN BUSINESS

SPOTLIGHT

Suzi Petrozzi ⏐ Wellness Psychologist

6

For me it was working in adolescent mental health and their families where the focus was on symptoms, on what was wrong not on what was possible. After 8 years in the mental health I left the ‘security blanket’ to start my own coaching business with a focus on helping women learn and discover what was possible for them.

What have been the biggest challenges that you have encountered running your own business?

Trusting the bigger picture and in my dream. When I first started, there were so many psychologists and coaches, and I got lost in trying to be different and ‘overefforting’. But when I learned to focus on what drives me and why I do what I do, that gave me the inspiration, energy, drive and faith to keep going.

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What do you most love about being a woman?

We have a strong intuition and the capacity to feel and express emotions- much more so then men.

I believe these our inherent internal mechanisms to help us, and others grow and transform into being more loving, accepting, patient and tolerant. It’s our gift as women, to teach others how to deeply and lovingly connect with each other.

In the work that you do what are the most common challenges that you find your clients come to you with?

Most of the women that I see are in their mid 40’s and are often at cross roads in their life, especially in their career. They feel overwhelmed, under pressure and unfulfilled because for too long they’ve put other people first and let opportunities slip by as a result. And yet they know there is so much to them. They know they have what it takes to do something bigger with what’s inside of them. By the time they come to see me they’re ready to address these emotional barriers and start putting themselves first and asking what do I really want.

How do you help people with these challenges?

I teach women my 5P’s TO EMPOWERMENT which consists of the following steps.

1. BE PRESENT. Learning how to stay grounded and present when you’re handed curve balls – especially when those curve balls trigger intense negative emotions like anger, shame, resentment, blame, frustration, guilt, anxiety etc…I like to call this process “clearing the crap”. J IN YOUR POWER. 2. STAY Identifying your exact sabotaging that switch on core beliefs behaviours, thoughts and

emotions that keep the same patterns repeating in your life.

3. BE ON PURPOSE. Identifying your values and aligning all your decision making with your values. When you’re aligned with your values everything falls in place much easier. This process naturally leads to discovering your mission, purpose and vision – a process which helps you understand why you do what you do in life.

4. ACTIVATE YOUR POTENTIAL: Learning how to stay in the question, and ask powerful questions to deal with challenges and turn them into lessons, not regrets.

5. CREATE POSSIBILITES: When you understand how to allow every past experience, person and situation in your life to help you to grow and transform, you learn the process of creating possibilities for yourself and the life you want.

Why is it important that we aspire for empowerment?

To me empowerment is a process of ongoing learning, growth and transformation. It’s a process we need to get comfortable with because it’s part of life and part of being a human being. If we don’t aspire for empowerment what’s the point really??

What is your advice to someone who wants to be more empowered?

Where should they start?

First they need to be willing and ready to change. That means saying yes to themselves more often. A simple way to start is to attend webinars, courses, and to find a mentor/coach. Learn from someone who’s trekked the path you’re on.

Also, commit and meditation, yoga,

start practicing journaling or

something else. The aim is to have the opportunity to self-reflect and learn things about yourself. With self-awareness comes, knowledge, with knowledge comes clarity. And then comes meaning and purpose.

You have to stay on purpose.

How can people contact you/work with you if they are curious about your work?

You can visit my website www.suzipetrozzi.com

on

Suzi is will teaching her signature online program called "The Empowered Woman Virtual Bootcamp - Get Clear, Take Charge and Make it Happen! " where she'll dive deep and teach the 5 P's to Empowerment and guide women on a journey to growth and transformation. The program starts 20th September 2016 but enrollments are limited to 20 women to keep the group intimate.

This is program is for you if: - You're tired of putting other people first and letting opportunities slip by; - You're sick of the same old stories you tell yourself that hold you back - You're done with feeling unappreciated and unfulfilled - You are ready to make a powerful and lasting change If you would like to find out if this program is for you please email Suzi on suzi@suzipetrozzi.com with subject line: Enquiry TEW Bootcamp and she'll schedule a time to talk with you.

Thank you Suzi for your inspiring words. Stay tuned for next months Women in Business Spotlight

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THINK YOU MIGHT BE ENERGY SENSITIVE? 15 TRAITS THAT WILL LET YOU KNOW. MAREE EDDINGS ⏐ E N E R G Y

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You may have heard the term energy sensitive, or highly sensitive person or even the word EMPATH and wondered what is about or even if you may have some of it.

I want to share with you the basics about what energy sensitivity is about and a way that you can check out if this is something that you relate to or someone you know is experiencing.

Off that bat I am going to say please don’t worry about the label or the term that is used. It is far more important that you consider the experience that you have to determine if you may be in fact energy sensitive.

Also, this not a disease, an illness or ailment, it is not an allergy or an intolerance.

Energy sensitivity is the process that describes how your body processes and relates to energy. Basically you feel energy. Your own energy, other people’s energy and the environment you are in.

Now we are all energetic (ask Einstein) so energy is a currency that our body relates to. We all take in energy from various sources, we assimilate what we need and we eliminate what we don’t.

Energy sensitivity is like an overload of stimuli that hits the body and the body doesn’t have enough time to eliminate what it doesn’t need. It can happen in a single event or build up over time.

It causes overwhelm, TIREDNESS like all the time, a need to retreat away from people through to skin rashes and intolerable mood fluctuations.

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A Peaceful Mind ⏐ ISSUE 13

It can be specific to noise, to vibration, to quantity and to smell or all of the above. It can mask itself as illness that a GP might like to try and diagnose however it may not be replicated in standard medical tests.

In her book The Highly Sensitive Person, Elaine Aron reports that her research suggests that at least 20% of people in the USA are identified as being energy sensitive.

That’s 63 million people give or take.

It is not something that is unique to the USA. While Ms Aron has coined the term Highly Sensitive Person, being sensitive to energy has been something that has been known for centuries.

At the end of the day if you are energy sensitive there are some traits that are common regardless of what you are sensitive to. Most people who are energy sensitive report a consistent feeling of not fitting in and not being understood.

Which is totally understandable they see and experience the world from a different perspective.

They are often told they are soft or weak when they need to leave situations to recover their energy and clear their heads. It is a situation that when understood more clearly can absolutely change an energy sensitive person’s life.

So how do you know if you are energy sensitive?

Here is a list of fifteen traits that are common to energy sensitive people.

See which ones apply to you.

1. Feel other people’s energy – their emotions mainly 2. You know stuff, call it intuition or whatever you like, you just know stuff 3. Being around too many people can be overwhelming – think public places 4. React and can feel the energy from a TV program or movie and social media feeds 5. Sensitive to stimulants like coffee, alcohol, sugar and/or wheat 6. Excellent listener, strangers tell you stuff all the time and sometimes in random places 7. Intolerant to narcissist ego driven opinions, people and environments 8. Experience fatigue and feel drained on a regular basis 9. Struggle with boundaries 10. You are an over giver like sometimes you just can’t control yourself 11. Like adventure and freedom 12. You refuel in nature 13. Love nature and animals 14. Seek solitude away from people and places 15. Get bored or distracted if you are not doing something you enjoy

or love

What’s next: Understanding how energy works it the best way to sort through how to work with your sensitivity. Having strong daily routine help with energy reserves and getting things done and knowing how to take care of your energy so it is always at its optimum will absolutely alleviate any negative symptoms and experience.

There are so many positive aspects about being energy sensitive and my wish for you is that you embrace those aspects and live a fun energy filled life.

If you want to know more about how to work with energy sensitivity visit my website at www.mareeeddings.com and take the quiz OR book a strategy session and we can discuss your situation further.

Detail on my website www.mareeeddings.com/SSA/ Here is to your energy

Maree

How did you go?

Its not about the amount that you experience it is about the impact of the experience.

For years I experienced one or two of these traits consistently and I struggled. It impacted my ability to concentrate, to focus and be around people.

Being sensitive to energy is about how you feel and experience energy.

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A Peaceful Mind â?? ISSUE 13

Putting the Human into hr Failing Leadership

performance appraisal process,

to give our employees their opportunity to have an opinion and input into their professional development. Employee's won't wait! More than ever, the need for Leader's to engage their employee's and give them feedback in real-time, with the added capability of being able to support and develop the aspects of their performance that need to improve or are ready to go to the next stage, is a necessity.

Often, I find that Leader's believe their Cultural experience is their Engagement strategy. If people are happy they will stay! If we look at this image created by Deloitte University Press, we can see how Culture and Engagement differ and yet need to blend.

In recent years, there has been a strong move towards Continuous Feedback HR review models, that offer mentoring and coaching in a practical and on-the-job format.

With a focus upon the Engagement Strategy, as a certified coach and experienced business woman, I can speak specifically to the issue of outcomes derived from the provision of professional development. A qualified coach, who also has the experience in business leadership to offer mentoring, can bring new dimensions to a performance and raise an employee's sense of challenge and inspiration to stretch themselves outside of their comfort zones. So what if you are a Leader without formal coach training, can you be the coach your people need?

No more can we (the business leadership team), wait on the HR Department to perform the annual

In essence, anyone can be a coach. (Of course, a suitably

Big Data HR Integration is here...

Helen Treloar – Business

The challenge is how an organisation blends a robust yet agile HR system with the individual professional development program to produce metrics, analytics and results!

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A Peaceful Mind â?? ISSUE 13

qualified coach will have specific skills in driving to a particular outcome and has a library of frameworks to work within.) When coaching, rather than giving your employee the road map, instead you are giving them the destination and supporting them to create the route. You will use questions rather than commands and directives and you will support them to bounce around in that space whilst they create road blocks and dead-ends. The importance is in knowing the specific destination (outcome) including all nuances.

My experience has been that Leaders do well coaching processes to technical outcomes but struggle when coaching behavioural or mindset issues. As would be reasonably expected. We human's tend to do what we know, and there is no exception with coaching, unless one has been trained accordingly. The nuances in any outcome are largely the personal challenges that may prevent that person / employee from achieving the ultimate outcome.

Example: Polly wants to become a section leader over a team of 6. She has the technical experience and proven capabilities to produce high quality results in every aspect of her role, other than when dealing with potential conflict or difficult personalities. They tend to roll over her.

In order for Polly to achieve her desired promotion, she must demonstrate her ability to handle these personality traits.

Polly needs help! Her Coach will ask questions around her perceptions of conflict, what is conflict and when is conflict not conflict but something else... etc.

All too often, key talent is let go as the Leadership above them doesn't know how to harness or realise their potential. The Leader feels frustrated and the revolving talent door keeps turning.

My opinion (for what it's worth); invest in your Leader's and give them coaching / mentoring tools that equip them to understand themselves on a deeper level as they pay-it-forward and add immense value to their peers and those who report to them.

The HUMAN aspect of HR is again emerging as a critical component in the organisations where excellence is the standard of preference.

Allowing employee's to have a voice is much easier to manage, when that voice is met with educated ears; ears that know how to separate the narrative from the plot and what to do next.

We human's crave the HUMAN experience. Modern working life is all about experiences.

The organisations who value this and work on delivering this as a priority, along side sales and service models, have the edge in talent attraction.

A final note: To develop talent in an organisation where the back-end of the business systems and process lack, is a little like popping milk through the Soda Stream; a bit of fun but quite pointless!

To your success!

Helen 11

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A Peaceful Mind ⏐ ISSUE 13

How to be more organised

BY Lena Turvey

APM’S BOOK REVIEW Guest Reviewer Katrina Willis.

I’ve always thought of myself as a pretty organised person, so when I was invited to write a review of Lena Turvey’s book “How To Be More Organised” I wasn’t sure I’d find anything I hadn’t heard before. How wrong I was!

Lena starts by reflecting on the concepts of personal productivity and organisation, and that was when I had the first of my ‘lightbulb moments’. If you’re like me, after reading Lena’s advice you’ll realise that you’ve spent way too much time trying to follow systems created by someone else, that were designed FOR someone else!!

As Lena explains “To work productively you need to marry a good routine with a keen eye for what is not working for you. Only then can you produce personal productivity consistently.” It’s not about using a set routine or procedure, it’s about tailoring a system that works for you!

Personal productivity, family life and routine, time management, email/electronic file organisation, effective goal setting, procrastination and simple

project management are all covered in just enough detail to have you immediately creating your very own ‘To Do’ list. And, if you’re worried that your children might find your newfound organisational habits a tad overwhelming, I’m sure they’ll be onboard with the Bonus Point Boogie (you’ll need to read the book for an explanation of this….).

As I turned the pages of Lena’s book, I couldn’t help but start to imagine myself putting her suggestions into practice. Each page is filled with practical and helpful tips and tricks that can be applied equally to your personal and/or professional life. Life is so complicated and busy these days, but Lena offers ideas for creating simple systems to help keep everything – from organising your children’s swimming lessons to multimillion dollar work projects – on track, on time, and within budget.

Lena’s book is a treasure-trove of great ideas that I can’t wait to get started on. It’s easy to read, easy to follow, and easy to see yourself implementing new systems THAT WORK!!

What a rare treat to find a book on organisation, written with you and I in 13 mind. Thanks Lena!

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A Peaceful Mind ⏐ ISSUE 13

We’ve all had that conversation.

You know the one.

The one, we women, have in our heads – any given Sunday.

It goes like this: “That’s it. I’ve had enough. I’m starting tomorrow. Tomorrow I’m starting a diet. I’m going to lose this weight, once and for all, because I’m reeeeeeeally sick of feeling …. exhausted, frustrated, frumpy…and I wanna feel gooooooood.”

Why YOU Should

NEVER - Start a diet on a Monday !

AVRIL CARPENTER – Weight psychology

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Who

isn't

familiar

with

that

conversation?!

Perhaps the conversation is triggered by a comment from an unsuspecting family

member.

Sometimes

it’s

triggered by the sight of our double chin in the unforgiving light of a Facebook photo. Or, maybe, even our ‘fat jeans’ have started to feel tight.

So, it’s Sunday night….

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And post-conversation, we’re positivity

Because when Monday or New Year’s

bursting with motivation, commitment,

Day actually arrives, we then let some

and will power – because this time, this

other hiccup delay our start date again

Monday, this diet, is “going to work”.

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A Peaceful Mind ⏐ ISSUE 13

And again.

“Forget about all those other diets”, we confidently tell ourselves, “they were just

We become helpless. Even more stuck.

practice sessions for this Monday."

We lose our confidence.

And, because we’ve all been here before,

And our jeans get even tighter.

we know how that scenario ends, right?!

So what can you do instead?

By Wednesday (Thursday, if we’re lucky),

Always start now.

we’re

In this breath.

struggling

with

cravings

for

‘naughty’ foods, as we find ourselves

In this moment.

elbow-deep in the family-sized packet of

Right now.

chips, wondering where all that will power and motivation – that was so abundant on

No matter the day, the date, the year or

Sunday night – has gone!

the holiday season. As soon as you find

True or true?

yourself wandering (or bolting!!!) away from your healthy way of being, simply

Life is too short for diets.

come back. And then continue.

Diets fail for a bunch of reasons: they work against

our

bodies own

natural

No big start required.

wisdom, they create a vivacious yoyo

No fanfare.

cycle, and they’re a fun-free zone.

No drama.

The thing about “I’ll just start the diet on

Darling, all you need to do is start. And

Monday”…or,” after the holidays”…. or,

keep on starting. Starting today.

“in the New Year”….or any other arbitrary

Love etc, Avril

starting point is that those dates are completely meaningless.

PS: If you’re sick of the same old

What we’re really saying is ‘not now’

Sunday night conversation and you're

or “I just can’t commit right now.”

ready to make peace with food and live

And therein lies the problem.

the

We can imagine committing to a healthier

craving, virtual gastric band hypnosis

way of being sometime in the future,

might be exactly what you’re after. Why

but not now.

not drop me a line over here, today.

And

here’s

the

date never happens.

kicker:

that

future

delicious

life

Avril Helen

your

soul

is

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A Peaceful Mind ⏐ ISSUE 13

WHAT DO YOU MAKE NO MEAN?

THE WORD “NO” IN SALES IS NOT ABOUT YOU

PENNY VOTZOURAKIS - CUSTOMER SERVICE

When you hear the word “NO,” how does it make you feel?

For many in sales “NO” means they develop a sweat, they feel deflated, their shoulders drop, and they walk away in defeat.

What do you make it mean?

Could it be that you believe you are really bad at sales, or you should have listened to your parents who told you to go to University and do something meaningful with your life? Do you believe that you are a failure?

Whichever it is, you can change the meaning so you don’t feel so bad.

A saying I heard many years ago still sticks in my mind: “Every NO gets you closer to yes.” Embrace the word No. It is getting you closer to “YES.”

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I was recently speaking to someone who runs a small business. She relies on selling her services. We spoke about how things were going for her. She mentioned that the word NO means nothing to her. She understands that she needs to keep hustling and that the more people she speaks to, the better results she gets. She understands that she will also improve with each conversation, though it may not be the right time, or the product may not be right.

Whichever it is, she needs to keep on trying.

Where to start?

Sales as a profession is not for the weak or fainthearted. It all starts with your mindset, having tenacity, resilience, and behavioral flexibility.

You must always work on yourself before you get onto the sales floor.

Salespeople must not give up mentally or emotionally on making the sale.

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A Peaceful Mind ⏐ ISSUE 13

Tips to getting closer to YES. 1. Be careful about what goes into your mind. Garbage in means garbage out. You would never drink dirty water from a glass, so why put dirty information into your brain? Read and listen to only positive things that help you to grow.

2. Make your internal dialogue positive, and speak words that are optimistic.

3. Find the right people to hang out with; people who are positive. Remember, you can’t soar like an eagle when you hang out with turkeys. You need people who will lift you up and help you to reach your full potential, who will champion your successes and who will help you to find ways to be better when things aren’t going your way.

4. Make NO mean something different. What if you made it mean not right now, or you haven’t met my obstacles yet, which Zig Ziglar quoted as saying: "Every sale has five basic obstacles: no need, no money, no hurry, no desire, no trust." Once you change the meaning of the word NO, it has no power behind it. Neutralise the belief you have and what it means when someone says NO to you. What if you smiled or laughed inside? If that is what you made NO to mean, then anything is possible.

5. Where attention goes, your energy flows, and so does your life. The more you dwell on the NO being negative, the more negative you will get. So change your focus to ensure you concentrate on the positive things that happen, or on the people who say yes, or on finding the gaps to help you become better at what you do.

Sometimes it may be research, education, or finding someone who is an expert and modelling them.

For the next month try these tips and look out for what changes happen. Let me know what you notice that is different.

Happy selling.

Penny V

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A SNAPSHOT OF

AUSTRALIAN SPRING

Spring 18

Thanks to www.australia.com

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A Peaceful Mind’s to do’s and Must haves for the Spring As the winter cold fades away it is time for us to come out of hiding and brace the wonderful world that is around us.

We are fortunate enough to live in Australia with all off its beautiful landscapes in tow. But have we even treasured all it has to offer.

We thought at APM we would like to share some of our favourite places and the places we wish we could sneak off to from work.

Flowers: Spring is all about the flowers and they should be about to blossom, if not already, in every garden. One of our favourite places in Victoria is

home to the Tesselaar tulip festival every spring. With rows and rows of gorgeous flowers Forests: the world's oldest tropical rainforest, the Daintree is home to the earth's largest range of animals and plants. Experience them at their most vibrant during spring, when temperatures are pleasant and the wet season storms have yet to start.

Hear migratory birds join the dawn chorus, swim at calm beaches and see orchids bloom on the forest edge.

Wineries: Just north of Perth on the Swan River, lies the Swan Valley, Western Australia's oldest wine region.

Handpick a bottle or two from one of the Swan Valley's state-of-the-art boutique wineries. Follow the Swan Valley Food and Wine Trail and indulge your appetite in fine restaurants, relaxed winery cafes, breweries and distilleries, and roadside stalls selling fresh local produce. Dine alfresco in vineyard restaurants or pack a picnic and head to a national park. Cycle the historic Swan Valley Heritage Trail or explore the region in a romantic horse-drawn carriage, chauffeured limousine or a gourmet cruise on the Swan River.

Thanks to www.australia.com for the fabulous information, check out the site for more trip ideas.

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A Peaceful Mind ⏐ ISSUE 13

V e g e t a b l e

K o r m a

Thai pumpkin & sweet potato soup

Hayley martin - true form health

Ingredients: • • • • • • • • • • • • •

•

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What to do:

1 Brown Onion 2 Garlic Cloves 1 Cup Broccoli 1 Red Capsicum 1 Carrot 1 Zucchini ¼ Cup Peas Kale Leaves ¾ Cup Coriander ½ Cup Vegetable Stock 1 Cup Coconut Milk 1 Tablespoon Coconut Oil ¼ Cup Korma Paste 1 Cup Cooked Quinoa

Photograph: Hayley Martin | True Form Health

1. Chop all veggies and heat oil on a medium heat in a large pan.

2. Add korma paste, onion and garlic and cook until it starts smelling delicious!

3. Throw in the rest of the veggies and cook for a few minutes.

4. Add the vegetable stock and coconut milk to the mix, bring to boil and reduce to simmer for 10 – 15 minutes.

5. Stir through kale, coriander and peas and cook for a couple more minutes.

6. Dish up on top of a bed of quinoa and garnish with a dollop of natural yoghurt and a sprinkling of coriander and chilli flakes.

To check out more recipes go to: www.trueformhealth.com.au

Spring is in the air

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A Peaceful Mind ⏐ ISSUE 13

Floral Patterns As nothing says spring like flowers,

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add in extra colours with gorgeous spring patterns. This lovely dress from Mist is a definite try for this season – and great for the warmer months.

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Light & Bright

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Soothe your sense with beautiful flowers around your work place and home. Our particular favourite is tulips as they are perfect in the spring time.

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Comfy Shoes

With the weather changing you are going to want to start enjoying the outdoors a lot more. Search through your favourite shops to find the perfect pair of shoes. We love this pear of lace ups from Miss Velvet.

Sunglasses

There is no time like the present to start protecting yourself from the harsh summer sun. These gorgeous cat eyed sunglasses are a stylish way to protect your eyes.

Pattern Scarf

A beautifully patterned light weight scarf is the perfect accessory for those colder nights. And a great way to cover up during the day from the sun

Looking for your next best read. Well, find a comfy corner because you’ll be stuck like glue to this book until you’ve read the whole way through. A perfect, simple read for sitting outside as the flowers bloom.

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Eb & Ive’s Mari ¾ length sleeve dress is perfect as the weather gets warmer. But also great for layering as we wait for the sun. Which colour would you choose?

Flowers

After You!

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Hand Cream

Look after your skin with a soothing and soft hand cream.

Nourishes, moisturises and protects hands and nails with antioxidant vitamins A, C and E, pure essential oils and naturally derived moisturising emollients

Eyeshadow

Create infinite sensuous looks with these 12 different shades.

Infused with rose gold pigments, from bolder blushes, provocative plums and risqué rises. Perfect for any style and occasion.

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Small Handbag

Go a little lighter this month with a small over the shoulder bag, like the Rebecca Minkoff Saddle ….Bag

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“It was the answer to my dreams.

I adored birds, and there I was literally feeling like one. There and then I decided to become a pilot.�

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A Peaceful Mind ⏐ ISSUE 13

Believing in Yourself | NLP Model of Communication - Beliefs

Choosing You

LORES BONNEY (1897-1994) AM MBE

Joanne Clark | NLP This year I have seized the wonderful opportunity to explore places I have never been before.

And even today I am away from home having squeezed in a 6 day trip to Surfers Paradise escaping for a brief respite from the ‘depths of a bitterly cold’ Victorian winter.

After visiting England, Iceland, Scotland and Ireland I am struck by how our experiences create and define our beliefs – even at the most basic daily level of what exactly is ‘bitterly cold’?

Applying Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP) helps us to identify our beliefs and be really curious about if they are ‘working for us’. This strategy lies at the heart of effective transformational Every day we make change. choices, decisions and take actions framed within the context of our beliefs – some are obvious – such as avoiding exposure to our relatively mild cold weather.

Others – not so obvious! Whilst some beliefs are generated directly from our own life experiences, many are not.

Many of our strongest beliefs have been acquired in the past from our family, our community and our culture.

Most of the time our beliefs give us a quick and easy guidance system that assists us to make decisions aligned with our desires, ambitions and values but, sometimes it is these very same beliefs that prevent us from truly achieving the life we want. Have you ever, like so many Australian women before you, wondered … what if I don’t live according to others expectations?

What if I could ….

Lores Bonney (1897-1994) did more than just wonder when she discovered her passion for flying in 1928.

After a flight with Bert Hinkler, (another renowned Australian pilot), Lores said: ‘It was the answer to my dreams. I adored birds, and there I was literally feeling like one. There and then I decided to become a pilot.’

She quickly embraced flying adding her commercial pilot’s licence to a finishing school upbringing, classical piano training, fluency in German and French. Lores, like so many accomplished Australian women, was not willing to comply with the popular fiction that women were destined to live out life as a kept housewife whose duties would’ve revolved around

administering maids and gardeners instead she took to the skies.

Bonney was the first woman to circumnavigate Australia. In 1937, she became the first pilot ever, to fly the 29,088 kms (18,200 miles) from Australia across Asia then south to Cape Town. She also forged the eastbound Australia–England route in 1933.

But despite her many records very few Australians know about this world acclaimed Australian pioneer aviatrix.

Let’s fix that with one quick tale.

In preparation for the England flight, Bonney spent months working in the Qantas hangar learning to overhaul her Moth – out on route, she knew she’d be alone. This, however, could not have equipped her for…

Ten hours flying time north of Singapore, threatening clouds erupted in torrential rain. She knew to stay away from these tropical storms but also knew she had to get through – the nearest alternate airfield was six hours away, and she didn't have enough fuel to detour!

Visibility dropped to zero as the rain fell in dense gushes. It lashed her

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goggles and made the instruments two feet from her face impossible to see. As her plane reared and swayed in the unimaginable gusts, a sudden downdraft flung her toward the water.

Even at full throttle she couldn't restrain the descent and so just had to go with it regardless of consequences.

Courageously confronting her natural fear, she regained control 50 feet above the water. Phew!

Next item – develop an escape plan. Fast!

She remembered a small island she had spied through the gloom a short distance back and set her bearing for it. Recalling its beach, she decided to make that her landing strip. A lucky break in the rain blessed her approach and she was on the verge of slowing her landing when a stray buffalo wandered into her path. With her attuned pilot’s instinct, she swerved and one wheel caught the water flipping the plane into the surf. Now she was hanging upside down by her harness with her head under water.

Maintaining her calm as she grappled with her harness, the waves receded giving her a chance to breathe. Bonney recounts, “It

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took me several waves before I released my harness and plopped head first into the sea.”

Next day, Bonney inspected her plane. The tail-fin, wings, rudder and propeller were demolished.

Only the fuselage and engine appeared usable. She enlisted the help of some local villagers to remove the wings and used the remaining petrol to wash the salt and sand from the engine.

To prevent rust, she painted the motor with sump-oil.

After six days island-bound, a boat arrived. The skipper offered her a lift and was incensed that she wouldn’t leave without her plane. “I told them that I planned to get my plane repaired and carry on to England — even if it took me 10 years.” They thought she was a lunatic and suggested that she should seek her husband’s permission first. “Well, after that sort of nonsense I was more determined than ever!”

With her strong belief in her own abilities and her destination fixed in her mind, Lores Bonney carried on with her plane and eventually made it to England. She landed in London

on June 21, 1933, having completed the 20,000km (12,300 miles) in 157 hours' flight time. She was awarded a MBE by King George V for her extraordinary feat.

Despite international recognition for her contribution to aviation it was not until 1991 that Australia awarded an Order of Australia to Lores Bonney.

As we look back at the beliefs that hold so many women back – we can celebrate the successes of great Australian women like Lores Boney who choose to believe in themselves.

Women who despite all efforts to have them fit in and conform to the dominant and limiting beliefs about ‘acceptable’ and ‘proper’ behaviour for women successfully resist.

Instead they trust themselves and create their own beliefs from which they build their lives.

Applying NLP, identifying our beliefs and asking ourselves ‘How is that working for me?’ lies at the heart of transformational change. Every day we make choices, decisions and take actions framed within the context of our beliefs - when our beliefs limit our choices or entrap us into roles defining who we ‘should’ be and telling us what we ‘should’ do then it is time to upgrade our beliefs.

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A Peaceful Mind ⏐ ISSUE 13 was a woman of deeds, Lores Bonney vision and tenacity who ignored the incessant calls for women to inhabit

the kitchen. She believed enough in herself to trust her own abilities, her

own capabilities and to solve her own whilst we may once problems. And have wondered – how did she do that?

Now we have NLP training which means we can model the strategies, structure and tools – share her recipe for change and experience the freedom that comes from creating our own beliefs, building our lives, embracing our dreams and being the women we choose to be.

Make today your day!

Cheers

Joanne

Lores Bonney - Awards and Records 1932 - Australian record for a solo flight in one day – flying Brisbane to Wangaratta (Vic) 1932 – First Australian aviatrix to circumnavigate Australia (awarded the QANTAS trophy for outstanding performance by any QLD pilot) 1933 – First woman to fly from Australia to England – a distance of 20,000kms – approximately 5 times the distance flown by Amelia Earhart across the Atlantic. (Awarded the MBE from King George V in 1934 for this feat) 1937 – First person to fly from Australia (Brisbane) to South Africa (Cape Town) overland – a distance of 29,088 kms, 210 hours and 45 minutes flying time (presented with pilot wings by their Air Force command for this achievement) 1991 – Order of Australia

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A Peaceful Mind ⏐ ISSUE 13

Julie Bourke⏐ Technology

The Power Of Youtube

Promoting Your Own Products With YouTube 28

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A Peaceful Mind ⏐ ISSUE 13 There are many ways you can use YouTube to promote your own products. If you are selling an eBook,

you might make a video trailer

A book trailer is simply a promotional video that highlights some of the benefits of your book (maybe even exaggerates the benefits in a funny way). Think of it as a movie premier of your book.

The more gimmicky the marketing, the better. Take for example the hugely successful Rich Jerk eBook. If one were to make a video trailer for this eBook, there are dozens of videos you could do with the ‘Rich Jerk’ theme. They would probably be funny (exaggerated snobbishness), they probably get a lot of views (people always share funny videos with their friends), so videos would probably help to create a buzz and sell more product.

No matter how different and outside of the box your video promotion is, it will more often than not work in your favor.

Visuals help sales; When used right, this promotional video can mean a large increase in sales, and is a unique way to promote your book, eBook or any other information product or membership website.

Demonstrating Your Product: YouTube is a powerful means for demonstrating your product in action.

Whether you are selling a software program, golf clubs, or a house, putting a video of your product in action on YouTube is always a good idea.

It should be noted that it is also a good idea to embed the video in your website, so that people who come to your site from other promotions will see your Demonstration video. You can simply enable the option to “Allow External Sites to Embed This Video” and then paste the embed code into the HTML of your website.

Promoting Business Opportunities: If you have a business opportunity, YouTube may make a great place to tell about it. While the marketing community on YouTube is still small compared to rest of the internet, you may find that those who get in early and learn the ropes on how to promote businesses with YouTube will have an advantage. Video is a great and inexpensive way to make an infomercial to show off any business opportunity.

Remember, even if a only a few people find your video on YouTube, it is still a very useful place for you to host your infomercial videos because YouTube pays for the bandwidth, and the videos stream very well on a wide variety of internet connection speeds Marketing Yourself: If you are in the job market or looking to make business connections, keep in mind that you can also market yourself using YouTube. A video resume consisting of you talking about yourself to a webcam may help prospective employers and business partners learn about who you are. People make judgments based on looks and the way you talk, so practice a little. The upside is, if you make a good impression with your video, people will feel like they already know you a bit, and building familiarity goes a long way in business

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A Peaceful Mind ⏐ ISSUE 13

How To Build Your List By Offering Free Videos:

videos can be useful if they tell potential buyers more about your product or service.

List building is a very important part of doing business online. There are a few ways you can build your list using YouTube. The first is to put up videos, and at the end of the video, instruct the users to visit your website. At your website, be sure to have an email sign up form to collect as many subscribers as you can to market to them over an over again.

For example, if you were selling a series of cooking videos on DVD, you might find it useful to do a short series of YouTube videos demonstrating a few recipes and then direct watchers to your website where they could purchase complete DVDs. You might also have the educational videos embedded in your website to help show what you do to people who find your site in the search engines.

You may also want to use videos as incentives for people to sign up. For example, in exchange for a name and email address, you can send your subscribers a link to 2 sample videos which offer a sample of your product or some type of demonstration. This is especially effective if you have an information product and you can show one or two techniques to pique the prospects interest. Be sure to describe the videos and the benefits they’ll receive from watching them and you’ll likely increase your email list.

It helps to build trust when people see a sample and see that what you are offering is good.

Trust Building: If you have an email list already, you may want to create a few videos of yourself and your product to help build a personal relationship with your subscribers. This may not be appropriate for all types of businesses, but there is always some way you can increase trust with video that shows your subscribers more about what you can offer them.

Educational Videos: Educational videos also fall under the category of trust building. Educational

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Getting Video Testimonials For Your Product: Anytime you can get a video testimonial for your product, it is always a good thing. We have seen the popularity of video testimonials for marketing seminars. Why not put all of these videos on YouTube with the appropriate tags? Testimonials recorded either at an event or simply by a webcam may increase your credibility and help people gain trust. If your customers are video users, you might offer an incentive for actually taking the time to do a YouTube testimonial for you.

Finally, Get Video Of Customers Using Your Product!

Anytime a customer is willing to create a video of them actually using your product -that is truly excellent. This can be used is both for your sales materials on your website, as well as random people finding you on YouTube

Julie

ph: +61 420 305 989 | www.destinypursuit.com.au

coaching & training

Contact joanne@destinypursuit. com.au a few places are available for the next training - 7 Days to be a Practitioner of NLP. Register now at pages.destinypursuit.com/nlp-apm If you are ready for more you can also take your training to the next level in Joanne’s 10 day Master Practitioner training. Register at destinypursuit.com.au/events.php

WWW.DESTINYPURSUIT.COM.AU

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A Peaceful Mind ⏐ ISSUE 13

ARE YOU DRAWN TO THE SHINY

Red apple…?

Pippa Hanson ⏐ personal journey Find your passion and you will always be successful and happy.

Will it give you the lifestyle you want though?

schools for my children and help other people. I set out and finally first investment bought my property.

I always believed that I would grow up, get married and have children and that financially as a women I would be capable of supporting myself. Positive thinking, a good education and action.

Buy and hold, buy and hold, buy and hold – from all the reading, knowledge and advice I had gained I knew that property would increase in value and if I held onto it I could use the equity to fund my choices above and I could make a difference in other people’s lives.

(Over the last 100 years in Australia, property has been proven to double in value every 710 years)

At 19 there was a new development in the area, I was in first year of university, living away from home (funded by my parents) and wanted to buy an investment property.

I asked them to be guarantors, I’m sure you can guess their response. I was only earning enough money to have a bit of a social life while studying.

At 22 years of age I was employed full time in a job that I loved but long term it was not going to allow me to travel regularly, eat out at nice restaurants, have a choice of

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What I did know is I had watched people, my friend’s parents and grandparents along the way and I knew that I wanted to be able to live to work not work to live day by day.

Sounds easy right! It meant I had to make choices, it meant I didn’t pick every shiny red apple I came

across, the extra pair of new shoes, the extra night out each week, I had contribute to a rental property mortgage over a lifestyle at a stage in my life when I had a high disposable income. This choice was for a long term better outcome.

Patience is the key.

As the years went on I added to the property portfolio little by little and ten years after buying my first investment property it allowed me to build and create my passion as a business owner. I am now in that position to have choices for my family, help other people and to give back to the community. 20 years after buying my first investment property I continue to enjoy every day, and the work I choose to do.

It’s never too late to invest, get good advice and go for it! Live your financial dreams through your investments and live your life by doing what you love to do.

Pippa

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“A leader takes people where they want to go.

A great leader takes people where they don’t necessarily want to go, but ought to be.”

Rosalynn Carter

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A Peaceful Mind ⏐ ISSUE 13

Be the leader you were born to be AND ABANDON THE “PITY PARTY FOR 1” ONCE AND FOR ALL!

Lisa Wiking ⏐ MOTIVATIONAL Leadership Are you a Parent?

Do you play or coach Sport?

Do you work in a Team?

For as long as I can remember (well at least the last 19 years) my passion and purpose has been to dive deep into all things leadership. 19 years ago I was fortunate enough to have a negative experience with my boss, which had a significant impact on me and my life. I was so unhappy, hated going to work even though I loved the job. I’d go home crying, wanting to quit almost every day. I persisted because of some very sound advice, “Don’t quit on a bad day”.

Eventually my boss left, making room for me to step up into the leadership position. This was so exciting for me, although, I had no experience as a leader (at age 21) and very little experience in the technical job. I recruited a whole new team and with our enthusiasm and naivety set out to turn the failing business around.

My strategy was simply to do exactly the opposite to what my boss had done. And, guess what, it worked! All I did was take care of my people and made sure we had fun and we turned the business around almost $150k.

To me, that has been my driving factor. If I was unhappy at work, then surely there had to be many other people in a similar position, and in the years proceeding, I’ve discovered that this isn’t an unlikely story, in fact, sadly, it’s more likely than the alternative. I knew this was my thing, leadership is it. The impact it has on the happiness of employees across the globe not to mention the ability to improve the productivity for business success.

Upon reflection, I was viewing leadership as 1 Dimensional, thinking that this is the only environment that it’s important in.

How narrow minded. Whilst it may sound like a corporate or business term, it’s certainly not, and here’s why.

Two and a half years ago, I became a mum, and again 8 months ago. And if I thought I had ownership over my team at work (and I did, they were all my babies and I cared so much for them all), it was nothing compared to the responsibility I feel in raising my two gorgeous children to be happy, confident and successful individuals.

It is our (my partner is involved also :)) responsibility to ensure these two little people grow up with a strong sense of self worth, self confidence, knowing how to experience and feel love,

connection, security, adventure, growth and contribution. There is no other role or title more important on my C.V. than the one I hold as “Mummy”. Because if I don't give this to my children then who will?

This led me to thinking, what do I believe are the fundamentals of leadership?

That are the foundations of any strong leader, regardless of the environment they find themselves in.

Business, Sports or Parenting.

Today I believe there is no leadership role more important than that of a parent.

Here’s my conclusion….

1) Safety First and foremost, to experience any level of happiness, every human being on the planet, must experience certainty. Certainty in knowing that they are ok, that they are good enough, that they are safe within their environment and accepted. So here are a few tips on how to make someone feel safe in their environment: To ensure they feel safe, we must firstly set very clear boundaries, expectations of what behaviour is acceptable and what is not. Then we must acknowledge when their behaviour matches these expectations and discipline when it doesn’t. After all, consequences happen in life, whether we like it or not, so to ensure a harmonious

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environment, emulate life.

We must also give them the freedom and space to make their own decisions, for the level they are ready for.

Give them the opportunity to make their own choices, whilst ensuring their safety. It will allow them to take responsibility therefore allowing them to build confidence and determine their level of success and achievement.

2) Confidence Value and validate what they’ve got to say, and give them the time to hear it. This means looking away from what you are doing and having eye contact with them.

Then respond to them with respect.

Demonstrate appreciation when they do something well.

As leaders, we are quick to highlight when something isn’t done well, so we must also highlight when things are done well. Appreciating the behaviour they displayed and also the characteristic it took to perform that behaviour.

Eg. If the child took his/her plate to the kitchen bench after dinner, recognise the behaviour of picking up the plate and carrying it to the kitchen, and also the characteristic of ‘initiative’ the child displayed, doing it themselves without being asked.

They must also be able to trust you. Trust that you’re not going to fly off the handle for any reason, trust that they can confide in you and share their honesty without ramifications. Trust that they have your love and acceptance regardless.

A saying I live by “dislike the behaviour, not the person”. A person is not their behaviour.

3) Direction No matter how old your people are, we all need to understand the big picture.

The direction we are

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heading and why.

When we understand why, the how becomes much easier. So communicate the vision and goal, whether it be for the day, the week or the year. Like wanting to lose weight. It’s much easier to get ourselves exercising and eating well, if we know ‘why’ we want to lose weight and what weight we’d like to be. It could be for a wedding, an event or even summer?? Having a clear image of why we must take action makes taking action so much easier. Then if you need to, add in what I like to all the WIIFM! The “Whats In It For Me” - what do they get out of this. Highlight the benefit or the bonus for them personally from achieving the Vision and goal for the day, week or year.

Whilst there are many elements to leadership, these are the foundations, which are essential for being a great leader. But sometimes it’s not that easy, we don't feel capable, we’ve got our own “stuff” that gets in the way.

Often as a leader we can get down on ourselves and start beating ourselves up because we don't feel we are doing a great job, all of the time.

Firstly, it’s important to give yourself a break and remember, that you are doing the best you can with the resources you have available to you.

If you’re not happy with how you’re doing, then all you need to do is simply give yourself some more resources.

Forget the “I’m not good enough” story, I know that one, and you ARE GOOD ENOUGH. Because you are here you are good enough. I’m sure this ‘story’ comes with the ‘female’ territory. We all carry that one on some level. You are you, you are unique and you add value just being you. In fact, only when you are being you, can you be an effective leader, because trying to be anyone else comes across as inauthentic and deceitful.

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leader starts with self confidence, Being a great being self aware, and having emotional intelligence. It all starts with you. If you’re familiar with the ‘pity party for 1’ in your head, feeling guilty, feeling blame and frustration, then it’s time to step up. Being the victim doesn’t work, have you noticed? Feeling sad and depressed doesn't solve anything either. It’s time to give yourself a break and find some alternative choices. It’s time to take control. It doesn’t have to be this way. You can have a better experience, a more empowered experience and be a better leader.

Here’s the first steps: 1) Turn off the TV - don’t allow mainstream media to program your brain 2) If you don't already, start reading - A good book is “Awaken The Giant Within” Anthony Robins 3) Explore and think about what your life purpose is. (This is a long process but if you never start thinking then you’ll never know) 4) Get to know you, what you love, what you’re passionate about by taking 30 min per day to meditate. Just quieten your mind and count to 100 over and over again for 30 min 5) Get a coach - remember the mind that creates the problem cant establish the solution so find a coach you can trust to walk you though the process of self discovery Finally, smile. Simply looking up, a straight posture and a smile on your dial will instantly make you feel better - always. I dare you to try and feel sad when you do this! :) If you’d like to begin dealing with the ‘negative voice’ inside you’re head, but are unsure where to begin, then for a limited time, I’m offering all APM readers a complimentary coaching session (45 min) to help you gain clarity and certainty.

Simply email me; lisa@motivationalleadership.com.au or call on 0408 711 769, to book in your time.

I wish you my heart felt best in beginning or continuing to discover you.

It’s such a rewarding and thrilling process and one that just gets better and better as time goes on.

Lisa Wiking

Author, Coach, Trainer Motivational Leadership

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A Peaceful Mind â?? ISSUE 13

Ever walked away from a conversation with someone, feeling a strong sense of judgement or of being misunderstood?

That feeling of wanting to go back and 'explain' yourself and bring wider perspective to the conversation, so they get a truer view of who you are; but the moment has passed and all that is left is that feeling.

Judgement Sits within the meaning we Apply Spring Soul Food HELEN TRELOAR – APM FOUNDER

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In a very brief chat with someone this week, I gave a snap-shot of a single topic about preferred waking times as we talked about what gets done in a morning before work. I mentioned that my ideal time to rise is 8am, by which time the other person has been up and busy for a good 3 hours, preparing children's lunches for school etc. I add, "that's hubby's role in our home", to which the reply 'what a charmed life you lead' ended the chat.

As a coach, I hear communication through filters. No judgement felt here, I walked away with a smile. However, I had an acute awareness of how anyone might choose to feel judged by such a comment. A 'charmed' life is not what I lead, indeed I work very hard, I stay up way too late and multi task many projects and deadlines constantly. Any failure, success or relaxation time I experience is chosen and earned. My husband and I are a team. We don't split roles by gender, but by preference and common sense and mostly from looking after each others needs; we put each other first and

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make life as simple as we can for ourselves and our children. It works for us.

My curiosity is always around the meanings people apply. Specifically, what meaning must this person have applied to my statement to make it true that I lead 'a charmed life'? What must be true for this person to take this position?

For the sake of the exercise, I'll follow through with some of the made-up meanings that came to my mind (keeping in mind that none of them may be the truth) to give you an example of what I mean (pardon the pun): •

• • • • •

To rise after 5am is not possible if you have a family and you care enough to prepare them for the day ahead A husband's job is not to make children's lunches To rise at 8am is late in the morning To rise at 8am means you are lazy and don't have much to get done For a husband to make lunch whilst you sleep means you are spoilt And so it goes on....

None of the statements above are true for me and my family, but they may well be true for others. The truth we walk around with becomes our personal filter, our way of judging others. We compare constantly.

My soup for your soul is to ask you to

disconnect yourself from the meaning others apply to your choices in life. Unless, the feedback from certain people matters greatly to you, in which case, talk with them and discuss your choices and ideas. To say 'I don't care what others think about me' is neither helpful nor true; we all care how we are perceived, unless we are a sociopath.

We are connectors and we all want to feel understood. Yes all. For me, I have found the best way to shut down the thoughts of judgement from others is by replacing the review of how the other person is perceiving me with an open curiosity about what must be true for them in their world in order for them to have that perception. At times, this and leads to me re-connecting asking questions or adding clarification, especially in workplace communications.

Mostly, it enables me to relax my mind, accept the feedback as a perception from their reality and truth and move forward. To reinvent myself, explain myself, justify myself or try and change their view so they accept me for me, can be a futile exercise.

Better I focus on who I am being and who I have in my world that has taken time to know me through all of my layers of personality, and accept, like or love me for who I am. This way, I also give others permission to be themselves too.

A Peaceful Mind comes from purposeful living, or as the in-word of the moment states living 'mindfully'.

You are a vessel of pure potential; the only person who can realise that potential is YOU x

Helen 39

CHARITY APM has founded a charity specifically to bring opportunity to Australian Women and Children.

2BMe Foundation raises funds to connect those who are focused and committed to improving their own life circumstances, to the resources that enable them to do so. www.2bmefoundation.org.au We look forward to bringing you more news about what we are doing and how you might get involved very soon.

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WRITERS WANTED Do you LOVE to write and believe you a story to tell that inspires or educates women? APM love to share – and your submission will be received with gratitude and excitement.

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