Manchester University
NHS Foundation Trust Tameside and Glossop Manchester Royal Infirmary Integrated Care NHS Foundation Trust
Help for the Bereaved For you in your loss Bereavement Support
May we offer our sympathy and sincere condolences to you and your family and friends at this sad and difficult time. This resource pack has been designed to help support you over the days and weeks ahead, following the death of a loved one.
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Contents A note on language........................................................................................................................ 1 Introduction................................................................................................................................................. 2 How you might be feeling................................................................................................... 3-10 • Intense sadness..................................................................................................................... 3-4 • Numbness....................................................................................................................................... 4-5 • Anxiety.................................................................................................................................................. 6-7 • Anger...................................................................................................................................................... 8-9 • Regret, guilt and shame............................................................................................. 9 • Conflicted feelings.............................................................................................................. 10 The grieving process.................................................................................................................. 11-14 Things to avoid doing................................................................................................................ 15-16 Things to try and do..................................................................................................................... 17-18 • Give yourself the best chance of good sleep............................. 17 • Eating..................................................................................................................................................... 18 • Exercise.............................................................................................................................................. 18 Seeking further support......................................................................................................... 19-20 What support services can I access locally?.................................... 21-23 Online bereavement communities....................................................................... 24 Telephone bereavement helplines....................................................................... 25 Books and Reading Materials...................................................................................... 26-27 Podcasts and useful apps.................................................................................................. 28 Large print and other languages............................................................................. 29 Notes...................................................................................................................................................................... 30-31
A note on language We use the term ‘someone close to you’ throughout this guide because we are writing it with the intention of being helpful to as wide a range of people as possible and we do not know how you define your relationship to the person who has died. We acknowledge that some of you may not feel that this does justice to the depth of feeling you have for someone you love but we also want this guide to help people who may feel that ‘loved one’ does not fit so well for the person they are grieving for. We acknowledge that some of you may have been bereaved of more than one person; we are very sorry that you have experienced this. For ease of reading, we have written this guide as if one person has died; we hope the information will still help you. We use the words dying, death and died. We understand that these can feel quite stark and direct, perhaps especially when written down. Culturally in the UK, we have broadly become unaccustomed to using these terms and may prefer phrases that seem gentler like passing and passed away. In our experience, people can become distressed by language that is unclear, risks minimising, or does not acknowledge the reality of their situation and so we have chosen what seem like the least ambiguous words. We hope you will bear with us if this is not how you choose to speak about your experience. We do not know the gender of the person who has died and so we use the terms they/them rather than his/her.
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Introduction We are very sorry that someone close to you has died or that you have been told to expect that they may die soon. Whatever the circumstances, we recognise that this is likely to be an extremely distressing time. We hope that you find the information in this guide helpful both now and/or in the future. After a bereavement, it can be difficult to know what to expect even if someone close to you has died before. You might be feeling a lot of different emotions, or be feeling numb and disconnected. There is no right or wrong way to be thinking or feeling at the moment. When people feel like they are doing particularly badly or that their pain is a sign of losing it or a failure to cope, then it is likely that their distress will be even greater. Everyone experiences dying, death and grief in very different ways. This guide provides information on the range of responses experienced by people who are grieving. We hope that, if you feel that what is happening to you is normal in the context of grief, you may avoid adding an extra layer of distress to your experience. We also hope that it will offer some advice on how to help yourself negotiate any particular difficulties and signpost you to additional sources of help if you feel that you need more. You do not need to read this guide in order. We have occasionally repeated information so that each section is complete for those who do not read the whole guide.
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How you might be feeling The grief you experience in response to the death of someone close to you might involve acute pain when you remember the past with them, wish they were here with you in the present, and imagine the things they will not be with you for in the future. Perhaps, if your relationship to them was not always as you would have wished, you might also be grieving the loss of a chance to have the relationship to them that you had hoped for. Everyone experiences different emotions whilst grieving; these are some of the most commonly reported: Intense sadness All-consuming sadness after a bereavement is very normal and it is not unusual for intense sadness to last a long time. This does not always involve crying, and if you feel that you are unable to cry despite feeling intensely sad, this is not unusual. You might also find that you cry at times when you are not expecting to or in response to things that do not seem directly related to your loss. The difference between grief and depression can be a bit of a blurry line and you, or people around you may want to see if you fit the diagnosis. It might be more helpful to think in terms of what your symptoms/experiences are (e.g. sleep difficulties, difficulty concentrating, loss of interest in hobbies/activities, low energy etc.) and try to find space to gently address those difficulties gradually over time, without getting too hung up on what to call what you are living through. The sadness of grief can extend, particularly shortly after the death, to not wanting to wake up in the morning, feeling it will be impossible to go on or that life is not worth living anymore. While these thoughts are common during the grieving process, if you
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are having thoughts about actively wanting to end your life or you are concerned about whether you can keep yourself safe, then please consider if there is someone you trust to share these feelings with so that they can help you feel safer. There is also a list of services that can quickly and effectively support you at the back of this guide. Numbness There may be periods of time when you feel nothing at all, or feel very cut-off from yourself, from others and from day-to-day concerns. People often describe feeling like the death is not real or a sense that the person who died may appear at any moment. This may be the case especially if the death was sudden, unexpected or you did not see them when they were dying or after they had died. If you experience numbness or feelings of emptiness, you might then feel worried or guilty that you are not feeling sad; it is a very normal and common experience when you grieve as your mind tries to adjust to a new reality without the person who died, whilst protecting you from being overwhelmed by the full implications of that all at once. Particularly in periods of crisis, it is common for people to go into survival mode and busy themselves with the day-to-day tasks that need to be done to keep money coming in, people fed etc. This means that there can often be an emotional lag later, once some kind of new normal starts, and people can find that their loss and the full emotional impact of everything that has happened to them hits them harder later. This is very normal but can mean that people find themselves struggling emotionally even more just as the initial offers of support may have subsided and the people around them assume that they are through the worst and/or that you appear to have everything under control.
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It can be helpful to respond to early offers of help and support with a holding reply via text or email or in person; this will be in your own voice but something like this might help you to frame it: “Thank you for your support/offer of help. At the moment I am focussed on getting through the next days/weeks/ months. It is hard to know at this moment what I might need when I get beyond that. Please check in with me again in a few days/weeks/months and I may be able to take you up on your kindness.” If you don’t feel up to doing that yourself, you may want to ask someone you trust to send similar messages on your behalf. If you find that you feel detached from the world around you for sustained periods of time and you are concerned that you can get stuck in a space that feels disconnected from others or if your life circumstances mean that grieving feels endlessly deferred, then you might want to consider getting some support outside your immediate circle. There is a list of services that can quickly and effectively support you at the back of this guide.
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Anxiety It is perfectly normal and understandable to feel anxious and it is perfectly normal and understandable to have a heightened awareness of physical vulnerability after the death of someone close to us; experiencing both at the same time may make that anxiety feel less manageable. You might be feeling worried, anxious or fearful for many reasons after the death of someone close to you. Particularly in the current circumstances, you may be feeling worried about how best to organise a funeral or do any of the administrative tasks that need to be completed after a death. Depending on the circumstances around their death, you might be waiting for post mortem results, which can bring with it high levels of anxiety. You may have depended on the person who has died for practical or emotional support during times of stress and be feeling their loss particularly keenly during an uncertain and anxiety-provoking time. Many bereaved people experience a displaced anxiety where they become worried about things they would normally have taken in their stride and which may seem to be unrelated to the death of the person close to them, such as using public transport, driving, shopping, or being in big social gatherings. They may also experience a general loss of confidence in their skills, such as feeling less able to do their day job, more unsure as a parent, socially anxious when they were outgoing before etc. People sometimes see or hear the person that has died when they are going about their everyday lives. While some people find this comforting, others can feel unsettled or frightened by it. This does not mean you are going mad as these are not unusual experiences to have following a death and are all part of your mind processing what has happened.
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Anxiety often produces strong physical sensations in our body which can be frightening under normal circumstances if you do not know what they are, but which can also mimic health conditions. For example, anxiety can lead to: •
Heart racing
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Sweating
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Chest pains/tightness
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Shortness of breath/breathing faster
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Feeling lightheaded/dizzy
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Increased muscle tension/aches
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Feeling sick/needing the toilet
If you are ill, it is unlikely that these symptoms would reliably go away altogether after 20 minutes of sitting still and doing controlled breathing, after avoiding a particular situation, or after distracting yourself. If you are experiencing these physical reactions persistently, speak to your GP. There is also a list of services that can quickly and effectively support you at the back of this guide.
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Anger It is very common and understandable to feel angry about the death of someone close to you. This can be directed towards the person who has died for leaving you behind; for doing, or not doing things that might have led to a different outcome for them or you. People can get angry about things that were or were not said between you; things that were or were not done. Depending on the circumstances around their death, you might also feel angry with other people, if you feel that they, or you, were let down in some way. You may experience intense anger towards strangers who appear to be carrying on as normal in a world that seems completely different. You may find that you get intensely angry about seemingly insignificant or unrelated things. Perhaps you feel angry at the injustice and unfairness of their death. You may just find yourself more generally irritable or annoyed and having more disagreements with those close to you or taking it out on your family. Or you may notice that you are less generous and kind in your thoughts; this can feel shocking if you generally think of yourself as a good person and then find yourself feeling resentful in response to people’s apparently happy social media announcements, for example. These feelings are very common and it can be appropriate to express anger about the situation you find yourself in. However, acting out of anger or suppressing it can have unintended negative consequences on our relationships, our health and our everyday functioning.
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If you are worried that anger might be negatively affecting your behaviour – if you are becoming aggressive to others, for example - there is a list of services that can quickly and effectively support you at the back of this guide. Asking for help when you are struggling with something is a sign of strength, not of weakness. Regret, guilt and shame It is common to feel that perhaps we could have done more prior to someone’s death and to go over whether it might have turned out differently if we had made different decisions. It may also be that you feel that you should have invested more in the relationship prior to their death; this may be particularly difficult if working/caring responsibilities have meant you saw the person who died less than you might have done previously or you prioritised your time differently prior to their death. Try to bring self-compassion to these thoughts and be kind to yourself; you have been doing your best in very challenging circumstances. If you are feeling overwhelmed with thoughts that the death is somehow your fault or that the way you acted before or after their death says something terrible about you as a person, for example - there is a list of services that can quickly and effectively support you at the back of this guide.
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Conflicted feelings Some people feel relief after the death of someone close to them and this can in turn lead to feelings of guilt or shame. This may be because the person who died was very unwell or in a lot of pain before their death or because their quality of life would have been intolerably poor had they continued to live. It can also come up when you have been under sustained stress prior to their death. If you had a difficult relationship to the person that has died this might also trigger very conflicted feelings about their death. It is completely understandable to feel this way, as human relationships are complex and will invite a range of emotional responses. If this is the case for you, you may feel isolated from some more readily available sources of support where people may appear to have less complicated responses. It is best not to assume this; many people may be experiencing something similar and assuming the same about you. However, there is a list of services that can quickly and effectively support you if you are struggling alone at the back of this guide.
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The grieving process Here are a few myths that you may have heard about the grieving process and how it progresses over time, along with the realities that many people face: Myth Grieving takes place in clear stages, and once you have passed through one stage you do not go back to it. Reality People move back and forth between feeling that they are coping well and not coping at all during the days, weeks, months and years following the death of someone close to them. There is no one right way to feel, and no one shared path that people take when they are bereaved. Unfortunately, perhaps, it does not seem as if we get to do anger or denial and then move to the next stage. If we can try to accept this, it means that the morning, six months in, when we wake up and are shocked afresh that they are not here, may not feel quite so crushing. The grief experienced shortly after a death does seem to be generally different from grief years later, however. The early response is often intense, all-encompassing and can involve daily yearning, significant emotional pain and a range of strong physical reactions. Trouble focussing attention, zoning out and forgetfulness are common. If you are further on in your grief and do not feel that you have seen a significant shift in any of this, there is a list of services that can quickly and effectively support you at the back of this guide.
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Myth There is an acceptable period of time to be grieving for, after which point you should not, or will not, feel upset by the death. Reality Everyone has a very different timeline for grief. It is not unusual for things to take longer than people expect to feel less distressing. Try not to be impatient with yourself to be back to normal. Equally there is no rule that says you have to be acutely upset for a long period of time; this does not say anything about you as a person or the depth of your attachment to the person who has died. You may notice that the people around you are keen to set a timeline for you to feel better or be back to normal; maybe they are also grieving for the person who died and they are doing it very differently or at a different pace to you. If you can, try and communicate about this with people you care about in a compassionate way. This will be in your own voice, but something like this might help you to frame it: “I know you also miss [the person who died]/are concerned about me. At the moment I need time to process that they are gone. I know it might seem like I am taking a long time to do that/I am doing that in a different way to you. Please bear with me.” If you don’t feel up to doing that yourself, you may want to ask someone you trust to send similar messages/have conversations on your behalf.
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Myth Grief has an endpoint. Reality Grief changes over time, but it is unlikely that you will get to a point where you feel that your grieving has finished. However, as our lives continue on, we often find that a bit of space opens up around the grief and it is not always as all-consuming as it feels at first. Over time, the reality and meaning of the death are better understood and people feel more able again to re-engage with meaningful or pleasurable activities and relationships. Ideally, we find ways to stay connected to the person who has died – if that is what we need – without their physical presence. People often find that they are either in a mode where they are focusing on their loss and doing things that bring up the feelings of sadness and pain, or they are distracted from their grief for a period of time (this could be minutes, hours, or days) by activities that are focused on restoring everyday life. Immediately after the death, it might be that you spend most of your time in that loss-oriented mode, and very little of your time is spent on everyday activities. This will change over time, but there is no prescribed time frame for how this happens and it might not move in the same direction across time. Both modes are important in the process of grieving, as we need to have time to process our emotional response and mourn for the person we have lost, but we also need to be able to attend to the lives that continue on for us.
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You might find that you spend much more time in one mode of grief than the other. You may feel guilty when you are in a mode that is more about restoring some kind of normal (e.g. catch yourself not thinking about the person who has died for a while or even enjoying yourself and laughing); you may feel stressed, anxious or judged when you are in a mode of focussing on your grief if you feel that you (or others think you) should have moved on or be coping better. Try, if you can, to accept where you are at any given moment and know that it may change in the next; this is part of being human and does not mean that there is something wrong with you or with your bond to the person who has died. There may be periods when you feel that you are sliding backwards and more intense grief re-emerges. This can occur around the time of significant events, such as holidays, anniversaries, birthdays, other losses or a particularly stressful time. When you are in pain it is understandable to want to know when it will end. Perhaps people around you have suggested that you should be further on or even over it by now and you are wondering if you are stuck. If you want help to process your grief, there is a list of services that can quickly and effectively support you at the back of this guide.
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Things to avoid doing People cope with grief in many different ways, and although all of these coping strategies are equally valid, some will be less helpful to us in the short and/or long-term. These are some ways of coping that are generally best not to rely on: •
Drinking alcohol or using substances (including prescription sedatives or sleeping pills) to habitually numb difficult or painful thoughts and feelings. There is likely to be no shame and little harm in using any of these occasionally and temporarily and if you did these things regularly before your bereavement, it is unlikely that now will be a realistic time to stop. Indeed, some people feel that using sleeping pills, for example, for a short time during their acute grief helped them to get the respite they needed to cope better long term. Things to watch out for are: using many of these in combination; feeling like you absolutely rely on even one of them for more than a few weeks; using them not so much to occasionally switch mode but to dull your experience altogether as this may become a barrier to you dealing with your feelings longer-term. If you know that you already had patterns of problematic drinking or substance use prior to your bereavement, it is likely to be important to stay connected with people, groups and activities that helped.
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Making significant decisions or changes to your life, in areas such as work or your living situation, if these can wait. People often find that they need some time to reorient to their circumstances now and can regret decisions that were made in haste.
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Rushing back to work or to organisational responsibilities if these can be postponed. Accidents are more common after severe stress, so take extra care especially when driving and using machinery and be more careful at work and your home.
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Consistently bottling up or avoiding your emotions in response to the bereavement. It might be that you need to use some distraction strategies to give yourself a break from overwhelming feelings, but doing this all of the time will be exhausting for you and will unfortunately not take away the feelings. In fact, they may then leak out at times you would rather they did not (e.g. at work) or when you are not prepared to experience them.
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Cutting off contact with family and friends. You may feel like you are in a bubble where it is very hard to relate to the concerns of the rest of the world and that they in turn, do not get it. However, being alone all of the time cuts you off from any support that people might be able to offer you, and this can increase feelings of sadness and loneliness. You may feel hurt or angered by the response of those around you who may say insensitive things or avoid you. Family conflict is not uncommon during a time when everyone’s emotions are high. Whilst withdrawing from people temporarily is very normal during grief, be wary of isolating yourself completely or reactively breaking off relationships with people who have been important to you until now.
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Things to try and do Give yourself the best chance of good sleep People frequently report changes to their sleeping habits after a bereavement, either sleeping a lot more or a lot less. While this might be a complex issue to resolve completely, some quick tips to improve your sleep include: •
Avoiding screens, which use LED lights, right before bed
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Keeping your bedroom cool
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Avoid drinking alcohol; this may help you fall asleep but the quality of sleep you get will be poorer.
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Avoid drinking caffeine later in the day; some people are more sensitive to caffeine than others, but definitely avoid caffeine in the evenings where possible.
Prescription medication to help you sleep can be a relief for some people who are struggling in the short-term with insomnia. However, they can leave some people feeling more groggy in the day and there is a risk of a rebound effect after stopping the medication as it is not a long-term fix. Discuss with your GP what is best for you. Using relaxation exercises, such as meditation or relaxed breathing, especially in the evenings, can also help to calm your body and mind. You can use the links below to find out more about these techniques. Take what is helpful to you from this and try not to have unrealistic expectations of yourself; these are skills that take practice and, if they are new to you, you are unlikely to master them straight away whilst under stress! www.headspace.com www.nhs.uk/conditions/stress-anxiety-depression/ mindfulness 17
Eating You may have noticed a decrease in your appetite since your bereavement, or an increased desire to eat for comfort. It may be difficult to adjust the way meals have happened if you were not the primary cook or if eating by yourself is a new thing. When it comes to eating to maintain wellness as best as possible, the main thing is to try and eat regularly and keep your body nourished. Emotional, physical and mental tasks will all become much harder if your body is deprived of nutrients and fuel. If this means grazing on things rather than preparing set meals, that may be a good short-term solution. If people are offering to drop off pre-prepared meals for you or organise home deliveries of food, this may be helpful to accept. You may want to ask one person you communicate well with to coordinate this for you on your behalf. There are apps such as www.mealtrain.com that can help with this. Exercise Regular exercise, even if it is just a short walk, on a regular basis can help to maintain mental wellbeing, as well as our physical health. Do what has helped you in the past and suits your current lifestyle though. If you have never done yoga before, now is unlikely to be the time that you will master it; try new things if the opportunity is there and you like the sound of it but try to have realistic expectations and not put too much pressure on yourself.
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Seeking further support You can contact the following organisations for bereavement specific support: Cruse Bereavement Care Tel: 0808 808 1677 helpline@cruse.org.uk www.cruse.org.uk
Free helpline open MondayFriday 9.30am-5pm (excluding bank holidays), with extended hours on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday evenings, they are open until 8pm. SaturdaySunday 10am-2pm.
Pet Bereavement Support Tel: 0800 096 6606 www.bluecross.org.uk
A confidential helpline which offers support to anyone following the death of a pet.
The Bereavement Trust Tel: 0800 435 455/ 0800 9177 416 info@bereavement-trust.org.uk www.thewellnesssociety.org/ bereavement
The Bereavement Trust is a free national freephone helpline, operating every evening of the year 6pm10pm. All calls are free, confidential and unlimited.
Children of Jannah info@childrenofjannah.com www.childrenofjannah.com Children of Jannah PO Box 306, Manchester, M22 2BY
Aimed at supporting bereaved families of the Muslim faith. This service is centered around supporting bereaved parents, raising awareness through education and training and, ultimately, providing comfort to those in need.
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You may also want to access general mental health or emotional support if you are struggling to cope, which is available through the following organisations: Samaritans Tel: 116 123 jo@samaritans.org www.samaritans.org Mind Tameside, Oldham and Glossop Tel: 0161 330 9223 office@togmind.org www.togmind.org
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Offer listening support for anyone who needs to talk Free helpline, open 24/7.
What support services can I access locally? Cruse Bereavement Care Manchester Tel: 0737 771 0382 Smart Storage Altrincham, 41 Craven Road, Altrincham www.cruse.org.uk
Cruse Bereavement Care is a national charity that provides advice, information and support to anyone who has been bereaved. The service is provided by trained, experienced volunteers and is confidential and free. Services provided include, Bereavement Support Groups, Bereavement Dropin Sessions, and a Bereaved by Suicide Group; Telephone Support, and Face to Face Support.
Let’s Talk About Loss (18-35 year olds) Twitter: @talkaboutloss Instagram: @talkaboutloss Facebook: Let’s Talk About Loss www.letstalkaboutloss.org
Let’s Talk About Loss is the UK’s first support organisation for young people who have been bereaved. Let’s Talk About Loss is a national peer support organisation, with advice online and monthly social gatherings called meet ups that run in Manchester.
The Sanctuary - Self Help Tel: 0161 226 3871 pws.manchester@ selfhelpservices.org.uk Oakland House, Talbot Road, Manchester, M16 0OQ www.selfhelpservices.org.uk
Offering support for adults who are experiencing anxiety, panic attacks, depression, suicidal thoughts or are in a crisis. The Sanctuary offers a space to talk and assistance with coping after a initial crisis. 21
Willow Wood Hospice Tel: 0161 330 1100 Willow Wood Close, Mellor Road, Ashton under Lyne, OL6 6SL Twitter: @willowwoodh Facebook: @WillowWoodH
Anyone who has been bereaved through the death of someone under the care of the hospice is welcome to contact the team. Anyone requesting support from the Emotional & Psychological Support Team at Willow Wood Hospice will be assessed, and if appropriate, offered support from a psychotherapist, counsellor or trained volunteer.
Winston’s Wish Conway House, 31-33 Worcester Street, Gloucester GL1 3AJ (Head Office) There are drop-in facilities in Manchester and Southport who support families in community. Twitter: @winstonswish Instagram: @winstonswish Facebook: Winston’s Wish
Winston’s Wish support bereaved children & young people aged 0-19 as well as their parents, carers and siblings.
Carers UK Carers Line: 0808 808 7777 Monday to Friday, 9am - 6pm 20 Great Dover Street, London, SE1 4LX
There is a free counselling service provided for carers who have been bereaved in the past 12 months.
Greater Manchester Bereavement Service Tel: 0161 983 0902 9am-5pm Monday-Friday (excluding bank holidays) greater-manchesterbereavement-service.org.uk 22
Finding Rainbows Tel: 07340 799387 finding.rainbows@outlook.com 9 Fletcher Street, Ashton-Under-Lyne OL6 6BY
Finding Rainbows is a registered charity within Tameside who support families who have suffered the bereavement of a baby or child, including early pregnancy loss.
Once Upon a Smile Tel: 0161 711 0339 info@onceuponasmile.org.uk Sidley House, 6 Brindley Road, Manchester M16 9HQ
Once Upon a Smile provide, emotional practical & financial support to bereaved families at their time of need to enable them to move forward. The charity currently accept referrals from a number of organisations, however you can submit a self referral by emailing referrals@ onceuponasmile.org.uk.
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Online bereavement communities If you’d like to chat to others in a similar situation, there are several online communities and forums where you can discuss what you’re going through in a confidential and safe environment. All these communities are free of charge but may ask some basic information to create an account.
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Grief Chat www.griefchat.co.uk 9am-9pm Monday-Friday.
You can chat to the team via a grief chat box which is very easy to use.
Marie Curie community.mariecurie.org.uk
You can share experiences and find support by talking to people in a similar situation.
Sue Ryder community.sueryder.org
You can share experiences, get things off your chest, ask questions and chat to people who understand.
Winston’s Wish (for bereaved children and young people) www.winstonswish.org/onlinechat
You can currently get online support between 3pm-8pm Monday-Friday. At other times, please contact their email support at ask@winstonswish.org They also offer a crisis messenger: Text WW to 85258 (available 24/7).
Telephone bereavement helplines You might prefer to speak with someone over the telephone. Here are some helplines that are active. Marie Curie Bereavement Support Line Tel: 0800 090 2309 8am-6pm Monday-Friday and 11am-5pm Saturday and Sunday. (Open on bank holidays 10am-4pm) Samaritans Tel: 116 123 24 hours a day Cruse Bereavement Care Helpline Tel: 0808 808 1677 9.30am-5pm Monday-Friday (with some extended hours) Winston’s Wish (for bereaved children) Tel: 0808 802 0021 Monday – Friday 8am-8pm The Compassionate Friends (for bereaved parents) Tel: 0345 123 2304 10am-4pm and 7pm-10pm, 7 days a week.
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Books and Reading Materials You may not wish to communicate with others online or on the telephone but instead, explore bereavement and grief at your own pace. There are some excellent reading materials available which we hope you might find of use. The Good Grief Trust has a page with stories from others who are bereaved and articles explaining how people deal with their own grief early on. There is advice from professionals which you may find useful. www.thegoodgrieftrust.org/need-know-info/from-us-to-you/fornewly-bereaved Beyond Words provide books, e-books and downloadable resources for people who find it easier to understand pictures than words, including people with learning difficulties. www.booksbeyondwords.co.uk It might also be worth exploring whether there are any bereavement blogs which you might find supportive. These tend to be less formal. Let’s Talk About Loss is a charity that publishes a regular bereavement blog which you can sign up to receive. www.letstalkaboutloss.org/blog
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There have been many books written about grief and bereavement but here are some recommendations: The grief book by Debbie Moore and Caroline Cowperthwaite A grief observed by C.S.Lewis Dying to know by Andrew Anastasios ‘You’ll get over it’: the rage of bereavement by Virginia Ironside Languages of Loss by Sasha Bates With the End in Mind by Kathryn Mannix
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Podcasts and useful apps It can be helpful to hear others tell their bereavement stories and experiences. Calm and Headspace are useful resources to explore to support your mental health during this time. www.calm.com www.headspace.com Grief works is a new app developed by Julia Samuel (Psychotherapist and founder patron of Child Bereavement UK) which is beginning to register users. www.apps.psyt.co.uk/grief-works
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Large print and other languages To request this leaflet in other formats such as large print, please contact the Health Information Centre on 0161 922 5332. If you require this information to be translated in another language please contact the relevant department who can support you with this. If you have any further questions about alternative formats you can contact the Patient Experience Team at: patient.experience@tgh.nhs.uk / 0161 922 5212, or call the Health Information Centre to discuss what additional resources are available. دوﺳرے ﻓﺎرﻣﯾٹ ﺟﯾﺳﺎ ﮐہ ﺑڑے ﭘرﻧٹ ﻣﯾں اس ﭘرﭼﮯ ﮐﯽ درﺧواﺳت ﮐرﻧﮯ ﮐﮯ ﻟﯾﮯ ﺑراِه ﮐرم ﮨﯾﻠﺗﮭ اﻧﻔﺎرﻣﯾﺷن ﺳﻧﭨر ﺳﮯ ﭘر راﺑطہ ﮐرﯾں۔5332 922 0161 اﮔر آپ ان ﻣﻌﻠوﻣﺎت ﮐو ﮐﺳﯽ اور زﺑﺎن ﻣﯾں ﺗرﺟﻣہ ﮐرواﻧﺎ ﭼﺎﮨﺗﮯ ﮨﯾں ﺗو ﺑراِه ﮐرم ﻣﺗﻌﻠﻘہ ﻣﺣﮑﻣہ ﺳﮯ راﺑطہ ﮐرﯾں ﺟو آپ ﮐو اس ﻣﻌﺎﻣﻠﮯ ﻣﯾں ﻣﻌﺎوﻧت ﻣﮩﯾﺎ ﮐر ﺳﮑﺗﺎ ﮨﮯ۔ اﮔر ﻣﺗﺑﺎدل ﻓﺎرﻣﯾٹ ﮐﮯ ﺣواﻟﮯ ﺳﮯ آپ ﮐﮯ ﭘﺎس ﮐوﺋﯽ ﻣزﯾد ﺳوال ﮨﮯ ﺗو آپ :ﻣﻧدرﺟہ ذﯾل ﭘر ﭘﯾﺷﻧٹ اﯾﮑﺳﭘﯾرﯾﻧس ﭨﯾم ﺳﮯ راﺑطہ ﮐر ﺳﮑﺗﮯ ﮨﯾںpatient.experience@tgh.nhs.uk / 922 0161 ﯾﺎ ﮨﯾﻠﺗﮭ اﻧﻔﺎرﻣﯾﺷن ﺳﻧﭨر ﮐو ﮐﺎل ﮐر ﮐﮯ درﯾﺎﻓت ﮐرﯾں ﮐہ ﮐون ﺳﮯ اﺿﺎﻓﯽ وﺳﺎﺋل دﺳﺗﯾﺎب ﮨﯾں۔،5212 ﯾُرﺟﻰ اﻻﺗﺻﺎل ﺑﻣرﻛز اﻟﻣﻌﻠوﻣﺎت اﻟﺻﺣﯾﺔ ﻋﻠﻰ اﻟرﻗم،ﻟطﻠب ھذه اﻟﻧﺷرة ﺑﺗﻧﺳﯾﻘﺎت أﺧرى ﻣﺛل اﻟﺣروف اﻟﻛﺑﯾرة .2335 229 1610 وإذا. ﻓﯾرﺟﻰ اﻻﺗﺻﺎل ﺑﺎﻟﻘﺳم اﻟﻣﻌﻧﻲ اﻟذي ﯾﻣﻛﻧﮫ ﻣﺳﺎﻋدﺗك ﻓﻲ ھذا اﻷﻣر،إذا ﻛﻧت ﺗﺣﺗﺎج إﻟﻰ ﺗرﺟﻣﺔ ھذه اﻟﻣﻌﻠوﻣﺎت ﺑﻠﻐﺔ أﺧرى اﻟﻣوﻗﻊ اﻹﻟﻛﺗروﻧﻲ: ﯾﻣﻛﻧك اﻟﺗواﺻل ﻣﻊ ﻓرﯾق ﻣﺗﺎﺑﻌﺔ ﺗﺟﺎرب اﻟﻣرﺿﻰ ﻋﻠﻰ،ﻛﺎﻧت ﻟدﯾك أي أﺳﺋﻠﺔ أﺧرى ﺣول اﻟﺗﻧﺳﯾﻘﺎت اﻟﺑدﯾﻠﺔ patient.experience@tgh.nhs.uk أو اﻻﺗﺻﺎل ﺑﻣرﻛز اﻟﻣﻌﻠوﻣﺎت اﻟﺻﺣﯾﺔ ﻟﻣﻧﺎﻗﺷﺔ،2125 229 1610 أو ﻋﻠﻰ اﻟرﻗم .اﻟﻣوارد اﻹﺿﺎﻓﯾﺔ اﻟﻣﺗﺎﺣﺔ বড় আকােরর মু�েণর জন� বা অন� �কান ফম��ােট এই িলফেলট� অনুেরাধ করেত হেল, দয়া কের 0161 922 5332 ন�ের �া�� তথ� �কD (Health Information Centre) এর সােথ �যাগােযাগ কর�ন। আপনার যিদ এই তথ�� অন� ভাষায় অনুবাদ করার �েয়াজন হয় তেব দয়া কের সংি�� িবভােগর সােথ �যাগােযাগ কর�ন যারা আপনােক এ�র জন� সমথ�ন করেত পাের। িবক� ফম��াট স�েক� আপনার যিদ আরও �� থােক তেব আপিন �রাগী অিভ�তা দল (Patient Experience Team) এর সােথ �যাগােযাগ করেত পােরন: patient.experience@tgh.nhs.uk / 0161 922 5212, বা কী কী সং�ান উপল� আেছ তা আেলাচনা করেত �া�� তথ� �কD (Health Information Centre) �ক কল কর�ন। Aby zamówić tę ulotkę w innym formacie, np. dużym drukiem, należy skontaktować się z Health Information Centre [Centrum Informacji Zdrowotnej] pod numerem 0161 922 5332. Jeśli chcesz, aby te informacje zostały przetłumaczone na inny język, skontaktuj się z odpowiednim działem, który może Ci w tym pomóc. Jeśli masz dodatkowe pytania dotyczące alternatywnych formatów, skontaktuj się z Zespołem ds. Doświadczeń Pacjentów pod adresem: patient.experience@tgh.nhs.uk 0161 922 5212 lub zadzwoń do Centrum Informacji Zdrowotnej, aby omówić dostępne dodatkowe materiały. 若需要以其他格式獲得此傳單，如大字版本，請撥打0161 922 5332與衛生資訊中心聯絡。 如果您希望將此資訊翻譯為另一種語言，請聯絡可以支援您的有關部門。如果您有關於其他格 式的更多問題，您可以聯絡患者體驗團隊：patient.experience@tgh.nhs.uk / 0161 922 5212 ，或致電衛生資訊中心詢問其他可用的資源。
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This book has been designed to explain some of the adjustments that you will have to face over the coming months, as well as sources of help and support available to you. The staff of Tameside and Glossop Integrated Care NHS Foundation Trust are committed to doing all that they can to help you at this time. Our sincere condolences go out to you. Reference: Tameside Hospital Resource Pack - Bereavement Support Publication date: November 2023 Review date: November 2025
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