MY FAVORITE STORIES

By Jack Dionne

Age not guaranteed-Some I have told for 2O years-Some less

Just As Good As

In the old logging camp days one of the favorite stories was that of the French cook who was just opening a big bag of Navy beans. "What do you do with all those beans?" asked the visitor. 'Huhl" snorted the cook, surprlsdat such ignorance, "Dem little white beans mak fine pea soup ! Anybody don't lak dem-it's a dam lie."

And then came the much told story of the butcher who wanted to sell some lean pork to the restaurant keeper.

Red Grimes Gets New Sales Argument

Along about 8:25 o'clock on the morning of August 22 in Merritt Hospital, Oakland, Red Grimes finally got a good reason for prying Redwood orders out of the dealers in Central California. Seven pounds of boy arrived and rumors are rife thaf eventually he will be at least auburn haired, although as yet the hair is noticeable only by its

Do Tou Know That

Ve can deliver anywhere in large or small lots:

REDWOOD or DOUGLAS FIR LOGS (with or without bark)

HEWN REDVOOD TIMBERS

Special Sizes SPLIT REDWOOD SHAKES

REYNIER LUMBER CO.

WHOLESALEDOUGLAS FIR AND REDWOOD

112 Merkct St. - San Francirco

Portlrnd O6cc, Arncricrn BuL Bldg.

"I'll guarantee you," he said earnestly, "that this pork will make as fine chicken salad as.any veil you ever used."

And now comes the Irishman who saw a heap of cranberries in the store, and asked the storekeeper what they were. "Thim is cranberries," said the Irish storekeeper. "Are they fit to eat?" asked Pat. "Fit to eat?" repeated the storekeeper. "Why whin thim cranberries is stewed they make better apple sauce than any prunes you iver saw.t' absence. Anyway, it said he is red.

The brand new father insists that Red, Jr., will be a radio tenor in order to capitalize on his abilities right off the bat. Later he may be a halfback or even a Redwood peddler.

Mrs. Grimes is doing fine, but Red will never be the same. He is still bragging about the way he fills orders.

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