Canarian Weekly Ed 802

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Ryanair’s huge Tenerife bonus Issue 802 3rd May - 9th May 2013

Tel: 902 232 102 info@canarianweekly.com Publisher, proprietor and Editor: MES ONCE SL Depósito Legal TF 1209/97 CIF: B- 38753802 Poligono Industrial Las Chafiras, No 65, Bloque 2-A, Urb Las Chafiras, 38620, San Miguel de Abona, Tenerife

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Best Spanish Spa

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Ryanair: 12 new routes

IRISH low-cost airline Ryanair has launched 12 new winter routes to the Canaries – to celebrate May Day!

The flights will begin at the end of October as an important part of the company’s 2013-14 winter season. This means that Tenerife is now very much a central hub for cheap Ryanair flights throughout Europe.

The flights are already on sale from www.ryanair.com and Ryanair’s Robin Kiely said: “We are delighted to launch these winter sun routes to Tenerife and Gran Canaria.

“We are connecting airports in Austria, Denmark, Germany, Norway and Sweden with the Canaries.

“This will ensure that our passengers can enjoy sunshine destinations all year round.”

The following fascinating journeys to various parts of Europe will be opened up for Tenerife residents: Austria: Linz-Tenerife LINZ is the thirdlargest city in Austria and capital of the state of Upper Austria. It’s

located approximately 30km south of the Czech border, and on both sides of it is the River Danube.

The “Blue Danube” Linz Airport lies about 14km south-west of the town centre, in the municipality of Hörsching.

The city is now home to a vibrant music and arts scene but, curiously, Adolf Hitler moved to Linz as a child and spent most of his youth in the area.

Denmark: AarhusGran Canaria AARHUS is the second-largest city in Denmark. It features the country’s principal port and is on the east side of the peninsula of Jutland, in the geographical centre of Denmark.

The “Greater Aarhus” area has a population of about 1.25 million people.

Germany: CologneTenerife COLOGNE is Germany’s fourth-largest city (after Berlin, Hamburg, and Munich). It is one of the major European metropolitan areas, with more than 10 million inhabitants.

The city is located on both sides of the Rhine River, and its famous

Cathedral is the seat of the Catholic Archbishop of Cologne.

The University of Cologne is one of Europe’s oldest and largest universities.

Germany: Memmingen-Tenerife MEMMINGEN is Bavarian and the administrative region of Swabia, in Germany. It is the central economic, educational and administrative centre in the Danube-Iller region.

The old town has many courtyards, castles and patricians’ houses, palaces and fortifications, and it is one of the best preserved sites in southern Germany.

Norway: Oslo RyggeGran Canaria/Tenerife and Oslo Torp-Tenerife OSLO is one of the wealthiest cities in Europe, thanks to the country’s thriving oil industry.

It is highlighted by its glass-covered skyscrapers, its new subway and, of course, in a whole bunch of trendy restaurants, bars and shops.

This beautiful city is situated right next to the Oslo fjord and it is constantly expanding

and developing.

Sweden: Karlstad-Tenerife KARLSTAD is built on the river delta where Sweden’s longest river, Klarälven, runs into the country’s largest lake, Vänern.

It has the secondlargest lake port in the country after Västerås and Karlstad is often associated with sunshine.

Stockholm Sweden: Skavsta-Gran Canaria/ Tenerife and Stockholm Vasteras-Gran Canaria/Tenerife Västerås Airport is located in the city of Västerås, about 100km west of Stockholm..

This is a vibrant, growing city which always has something new to discover.

It is one of the most beautiful cities in the world and a place for open, creative people.

Experience nature, cultural history and the bustle of urban life - all in one day!

The Stockholm Skavsta International Airport is near Nyköping, Sweden, about 100km south-west of Stockholm and the areas has a wonderful, historical background with lots for visitors to discover.

Playa Paraiso fire ONE week on and the acrid smell of the fire and the cause of the blaze that decimated a local disco bar in the resort of Playa Paraiso is still unknown.

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3rd May - 9th May 2013

The emergency services were called, by local residents, to a fire at 1.09 last

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Friday morning. First on the scene were the Adeje Volunteer

Bomberos, attending what they originally thought to be a house fire; it transpired that the fire had begun in the disco bar below the houses backing onto waste ground.

Two houses and a number of cars were also damaged by the blaze, which took four hours to bring under control by two crews.

Fifteen fire-fighters from Adeje and San Miguel fought the blaze with three appliances; the ferocity of the blaze was made worse by the roof being clad with polystyrene.

Due to a shortage of water, fire-fighters had to take water from the swimming pool of the nearby residential complex, Marina Palace.

No one was injured as a result of the blaze.

Los Cristianos is like a car lot The main roads in the heart of Los Cristianos have become a used-car lot according to Arona City Council.

Avenidas Antonio Dominguez and Juan Carlos I are being choked with used cars for sale, especially in the area opposite the bus station.

There are different models, prices and colours with for sale posters in their windows; some stay there for days, others weeks in the same place. But the cars are taking up a car

parking space, when space is at a premium.

Arona has issued a warning that the vehicles will be removed.

Some are avoiding detection as they are being moved daily!

Arona Councillor for security, Manuel Reveron says there is nothing to prevent someone putting a sign in their car, but there is a law prohibiting street vending in a public place.

Local Police have instructions to remove such vehicles. From a tourism point of view it also does not promote a very positive image of the centre of Los Cristianos.

Via Litoral to open

FROM 10pm tomorrow (Saturday), roadworks will be taking place in Santa Cruz, in a bid to open the coastal tunnel road – Via Litoral.

Municipal workers will be battling against the clock to put the finishing touches to the infrastructure improvements including new signage detailing a reorientation of traffic.

The main tasks to be performed will be the painting of signage at

the junction of the new road accesses, both in the area of Avenida ​​ Francisco la Roche and Avenida Maritimo.

Concrete structures called New Jersey barriers will be either removed or relocated; they have been used to prevent access to the new road.

The objective is that Via Litoral is fully operational on Sunday morning and the municipality of Santa Cruz has requested that road users respect the new signage and routes and proceed with caution on the new layout.

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Pro-cycling drugs doctor struck off …for seven years

News In Brief Body found at sea

PEOPLE in a pleasure boat found a badlydecomposed body floating in the sea, just of the coast of Guia de Isora, last Saturday morning The Guardia Civil said the advanced state of decomposition meant the body could not be identified, so it has been taken to the Instituto Anatómico Forense.

An autopsy will be performed to determine the cause of death, and, hopefully, help with identification.

The crew who found the body said the individual was wearing hiking boots.

Jewellery thefts – four held

FOUR individuals have been arrested following robberies at four jewellery shops in the North in recent months.

A joint operation between Guardia Civil and National Police caught the burglars in the act in La Orotava during the early hours of Monday morning

Overboard fisherman drowns

A 41-YEAR-OLD fisherman died yesterday (Thursday) after falling overboard in the La Puntilla de Los Juncos area, in Buenavista.

The rescue helicopter was called, but all attempts to revive him failed and he was pronounced dead at the scene.

Fears for missing man

CONCERNS are growing for Antonio Muñoz Romero (below), who has been missing since 15th April and needs medication.

His family and friends have been putting up posters in the search for any information.

The 32-year-old, originally from Cordoba on the mainland, is living in La Laguna and studying at the university there.

Exposaldo back in capital

EXPOSALDO, the shops’ liquidation sale, returns to Santa Cruz on Thursday (9th May) until the Monday, opening from 11am until 9pm daily.

The three-euro entry fee can be redeemed against purchases, and the aim this year is to attract more visitors to the 15.000sqm selling space.

There are more goods available, of all kinds, and there’s also a children’s area.

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The editor says...

Email: editor@canarianweekly.com

Corpus Christi

Canary's tourists have the biggest spending power TOURISTS in Spain - especially those in the Canaries and Catalonia - spent a whopping 3.28 billion euros in March.

It was up 13.7% from the same period last year, with the average sum per person 963 euros (+5.4%) and the average daily spend 110 euros (+5.º1%).

These latest figures were supplied by the Tourist Expenditure Survey (EGATUR), drafted by the Institute for Tourism Studies of the Ministry of Industry, Energy and Tourism.

Visitors from France, the Nordic countries and Germany contributed most to the growth, targeting the Canary Islands and Catalonia.

Results for the first quarter of the year was

equally as good, aggregate spending totalling 9.31 billion euros - an improvement of 8.4% on the first three months of 2012. The three main markets in this period were Germany, (1.56bn euros and a year-on-year 3.8% increase); the UK, whose tourists spent 1.53bn - 3.5% more than in 2012, and the Nordic countries, whose spending amounted to 1.37bn euros a mighty increase of 19.1%, and far bet-

ter than visitors from France in the period.

But the Canary Islands, of the autonomous regions, hit the jackpot by attracting the largest volume of tourist spending between January and March, at 3.16bn euros (+7%).

They were followed

by Catalonia (1.99bn euros - up by 14.2%).

And third was Andalusia (1.25bn euros - up by 10.5%).

Ferrari up in flames AS we go to print, we’re receiving reports of a Ferrari 360 on fire in Armenime.

The fire may have been caused by a problem that was highlighted two years ago, causing Ferrari to recall more than 1,200 super-cars worth more than £212million because of a design fault.

It related specifically the 458 model, which can cause them to burst into flames.

The flaw was identified in the wheel arch on the rear of the car, which is fitted with a special glue that’s unfortunately prone to melting. As a

result, the fault brings the lining of the wheelarch into contact with the hot exhaust pipe causing both the lining and the adhesive to heat up and ignite – gutted, quite literally.

3rd May - 9th May 2013

A SPANISH doctor involved in professional, drug-taking cyclists has been banned from practising medicine for seven years.

Yet Dr Eufemiano Fuentes, said to be the mastermind behind the largest-ever doping racket in European sporting history, escaped jail.

Instead, he was fined 4,650 euros and given a year’s suspended sentence.

Numerous cycling professionals were said to have been involved in the scandal, but most have escaped any form of sanction.

Doctor Fuentes’ surgery was raided in 2006, when more than 200 bags of frozen blood and plasma were found.

He is said to have been involved in providing transfusions for professional cyclists so that the performance-enhancing drugs they had

taken would not show up in the routine, pretournament blood tests.

Doping was not illegal in Spain when investigations as part of the so-called Operación Puerto (Operation Port) began.

It meant that Dr Fuentes was charged only with offences relating to damaging public health.

This week, Judge Julia Patricia Santamaría ordered the destruction of the blood-bags.

She refused to allow Spanish authorities, or the World Anti-Doping Agency (WADA) to carry out tests on them to determine whether more sporting personalities were involved in the scam.

Each of the bags had a code name, thought to enable the doctor to identify which sports people they belonged to, although this will now be impossible to find out.

Fuentes had worked as a doctor for track athletes, boxers and football players, in addition to cyclists, although it

3rd May - 9th May 2013

is not known whether he colluded with them in taking performanceenhancing drugs.

He insisted that the blood transfusions he was giving out were to boost their performance and to safeguard their health. And the crooked doctor was adamant he did not involve any procedures which broke the rules.

Since the racket came to light, anti-doping laws have been brought into effect in Spain.

They will be updated this year to ensure they are consistent with WADA’s requirements.

Dr Yolanda Fuentes, sister of the accused, and former cycle team officials Vicente Belda and Manolo Saíz, were acquitted.

Ignacio Labarta, another cycling official who was involved in the Kelme Team, received a four-month sentence but will not hube imprisoned.

The frozen blood and plasma bags, which enabled the cyclists to remain clear when tested, highlights just how the

sport’s most celebrated rider, Lance Armstrong, got away with doping for many years.

The American “superstar”, who overcame testicular cancer to become a Tour de France winner on seven consecutive occasions, denied drug-taking throughout his time at the top.

But too many of his former colleagues testified against him and, with evidence from all quarters stacking up against him, he was banned for life last year by the US cycling authorities, despite his persistent denials.

He finally cracked last year and admitted his guilt on the Oprah Winfrey Show.

The disgraced sportsman has since been refused permission to take part in a swimming contest.

Now, the US Government is in the process of trying to reclaim the millions of dollars Amrtsrong was paid in sponsorship deals while riding for the US Postal Service team.

THE municipality of La Orotava have just announced that this year’s 2013s Corpus Christi festival will begin in La Orotava on the 6th June; known as the carpet festival. the 2013 theme is Faith.

The feast of Corpus Christi dates back to its historical origins in 1264. It celebrates Spring, when the renewal happens in nature.

The festival became popular in 1847 when some family members of the Monteverde family, under the inspiration of Leonor del Castillo, made a carpet of flowers to celebrate the passage of the Corpus Andas outside his house.

Now, the carpets are one of the most representative art forms, and tapestries of flowers and volcanic sand are made for the celebration of Corpus Christi, on the eighth day.

Today the Alfombristas Association is the

body that oversees the preservation and dissemination of the carpets of flowers.

This year Corpus Christi is celebrated on, the Thursday. On Friday there will be the traditional dance, Saturday the holy pilgrimage takes place with the livestock show, and Sunday celebrates the popular pilgrimage in honor of San Isidro Labrador and Santa María de la Cabeza.

The carpets this time will be primarily red and white, and approximately 1,250 kilos of coloured soil divided into five sections will be used. Two of the carpets will be mainly floral, and the three main sections will illustrate the resurrection.

If you’ve never visited the festival it is definitely worth it – a mix of religion, tradition, culture and above all-colour!

More information is available from www.villadelaorotava.org

Canarian Weekly takes all reasonable care to check the contents of every advertisement, but cannot accept responsibility for the claims or statements made in them. Also, statements or opinions expressed by contributors do not necessarily reflect those of the Editor or Publishers. Material featured in Canarian Weekly may not be reproduced without the explicit written permission of the Editor.

Copyright © 2013 Canarian Weekly

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Local News

What's On 50th Anniversary The Beatles in Tenerife

Start date: Saturday, April 27, 2013 End date: Thursday, May 9, 2013 Location: PUERTO DE LA CRUZ Paul McCartney, George Harrison and Ringo Starr, three members of one of the best pop groups, if not the best in the history of contemporary music, The Beatles, made their first holidays in Tenerife, between 28th April and 9th May, 1963, after recording their first LP Please Please Me. On the island they were accompanied by their hosts and close friends, the Germans Astrid Kirchherr and Klaus Voormann. In 2013 Puerto de la Cruz celebrates the 50th Anniversary of The Beatles stay in Tenerife, an unrepeatable historical event.

XIII Adeje Craft Fair

18th/19th May This popular annual craft fair will be taking place in the Plaza of Spain, in the municipality of Adeje.

VI Arona Jazz Festival 2013

Saturday 18th May, 9.30pm Taking place in the Church Square in Los Cristianos, international Jazz musicians will be performing. Further information is available from: 010 (922 761 600 if calling from outside the municipality).

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Valle San Lorenzo Farmer’s Market THE Farmers Market to be set up in Valle San Lorenzo has at last approved the rules by which it will be governed by the municipality of Arona; it seems that the new produce market has been talked about for ages with no actual action.

This market, to be located in the heart of Valle San Lorenzo, aims to boost the primary sector in general.

It will have room for 82 outlets, loading and unloading areas, a room for the reception and preparation of products, a room for the administration, public toilets, office, training room, games room, covered parking , concierge, storage and technical rooms for installations.

Local farmers may sell their own produce with the addition of artisan honey and confectionery.

The Department of Economic Development of the Municipality of Arona, headed by Afonso Marcos Esquivel, will be responsible

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Canadian tax ‘cheat’ is collared over here

A CANADIAN woman, who vanished soon after her tax-fraud trial started there more than a year ago, has been picked up by Tenerife police.

Interpol told Federal prosecutors that alleged fraudster Doreen Tennina had been “intercepted” on the Island.

The authorities are

now working on a formal extradition request for Tennina’s return to Canada.

The woman, in her mid60s, was captured in Tenerife, where she held

Unemployment hits rock-bottom

THE jobless figures for mainland Spain and the Canary Islands make for more grim reading this month and there appears to be no respite in sight.

Spain’s unemployed total has hit a record six million-plus, which means 27.6% of the entire nation are on the dole.

And Canarian statistics show there was an increase of

for the management and administration. He said: “We consider it very important for the economic diversity the future commissioning

of this facility, as well as the complementary path with tourism and promoting synergies between them”.

Among his responsibil-

17,200 people out of work during the first quarter of the year.

It means 4.68% more people were idle during this period, bringing the total number of jobless in the islands to 385,200, which is 34.27% of the population, compared with the 27.16% national average.

The huge number gives the Canaries the third-highest

unemployment record in Spain.

Andalucia is top with 36.87%, followed by Extremadura at 35.56% and then the Canary Islands.

Throughout the whole of Spain, the jobless tally increased by 237,400 in the first quarter of 2013, reaching 6,202,700 people - an increase of 1.14% compared with the last quarter of 2012.

an ownership interest in two apartments.

She also owned property in the Toronto area for a period before transferring some of it to her daughter.

Tennina, who operated her own tax-preparation firm, Executive Accounting, was charged by the Canada Revenue Agency in 2009.

It alleged that she submitted bogus donation amounts on more than 4,200 income-tax forms, issued phoney receipts for them and also submitted false carrying costs.

Those latter costs relate to claims on the forms for deductions on interest payments for investment loans.

The Federal Government paid out more than 10 million dollars in fake refunds

to Tennina’s clients in the 2002-2005 taxation years.

Police also charged her with a second fraud count for evading 636,000 dollars in income tax on her own company’s earnings.

Her trial started in March last year in Newmarket, Ontario, but stopped after only a few days when she disappeared.

Evidence later showed Tennina, who drove a Jaguar, wore diamond rings and gambled in casinos, had boarded an Air Canada flight to London’s Heathrow Airport several hours after a court

adjournment on 19th April.

Justice Cory Gilmore, of the Ontario Superior Court, issued a warrant for her arrest, and an international manhunt ensued.

The judge also suspended the trial until early January this year when it resumed, with Tennina in absentia. She had represented herself in earlier proceedings.

The trial ended a few weeks later, and Judge Gilmore plans to release her judgment at the end of this month, regardless of whether the extradition proceedings have been completed.

ities are, to perform the necessary procedures for the selection and allocation of posts, take appropriate administrative documents, etc.

Línea Directa highlights new law for paying fines NEW legislation governing the payment of fines for traffic offences was introduced in Spain on 4th March.

Ballets de Tenerife

SATURDAY 25th May, 8.30pm Tchaikovsky Auditorio de Tenerife Santa Cruz Price: 15 euros Miguel Navarro, director of Ballets de Tenerife More information: http://www. auditoriodetenerife.com/programacion

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The law, drafted and passed by the Spanish Directorate-General of Traffic (Dirección General de Tráfico) and the Ministry of the Interior, states that the payment of traffic fines in cash will no longer be accepted, and payment by debit or credit card only will be allowed.

The authorities have

cited security and economic efficiency as the reasons behind their decision, because, the risks and expenses involved with transporting money no longer exist.

The DGT says the measure will apply to the payment of fines only.

All the other administrative operations carried out at Provincial Traffic Headquarters,

such as processing or renewing a driving licence, can still be paid for in cash.

To make the payment, drivers must access the DGT webpage, www. dgt.es or phone 060.

Although Provincial Headquarters will no longer accept payments in cash, drivers can still pay their fines in cash at any post office, or Banco Santander branch.

In this case, drivers will still be required to provide and attach the fine reference number.

For further information, call: 902 123 104

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Best Spanish Spa

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The Spa at Tenerife's Gran Hotel Bahia del Duque, has been chosen by readers of the prestigious Condé Nast Traveller magazine as the best in Spain.

The prestigious award was collected by Santiago Cabre, CEO of Gran Hotel Bahia del Duque, owned by the CIO Group.

This is the second consecutive year in which they have won the award.

Back in 2010 they received a distinction for Best Resort in Spain.

Santiago Cabre: "The importance and uniqueness of this award is that these are those magazine readers who vote through the website of the publication, which adds to the value of this award, together with the prestige of the publishers".

In addition, the award

coincides with the celebration of the first anniversary of the prestigious French brand L'Occitane Spa in front of the hotel, which has been well received by customers, travel agents and journalists worldwide.

Inspired by the great climate and natural landscape of Tenerife, the spa offers a menu of treatments based on the resources offered by the environment of Costa Adeje, where the hotel is located. Marine extracts,

volcanic lava and aloe vera, Canarian indigenous raw materials are some of the ingredients that are used to develop the most innovative and amazing body and facial making up its menu of treatments.

Teenager yobs vandalise plane TWO youngsters, who smashed up an aircraft’s interior to the tune of 30,000 euros, did it “for a laugh”.

They were arrested after wilfully trashing the Iberia plane at Madrid’s Barajas airport.

The incident happened in the early hours of Saturday, when they sneaked through security controls and climbed aboard the aircraft, which was standing on the runway at around 3.45am.

The teenagers, aged 16 and 19, ripped off the seal around the emergency exit doors,

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blew up and then punctured numerous lifejackets.

They then played with the torches and whistles attached to the safety jackets, used to draw attention to cabin crew members in the event of a crash-landing into the sea. They also smashed up the land-

ing wheel and the radio in the cockpit. When arrested and questioned, the boys told airport police they “just did it for a laugh, because it was the weekend”.

The 16-year-old will be tried by a youth court and will probably receive a lighter punishment.

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Benefit scrounger’s cheek!

A £54,000 benefits fiddler has mocked British justice after avoiding a jail sentence.

Dodgy van blown apart after bomb scare at Gatwick A SUSPICIOUS van was blown up by bomb-disposal experts at Gatwick Airport on Wednesday.

Police said the vehicle - untaxed, uninsured and unregistered - was brought into the airport by two men, who then disappeared.

Concerns were raised about the van, standing on the ground level of the North Terminal’s short-stay car park.

Part of the area was cordoned off and traffic diverted, but flights were unaffected.

Several controlled blasts were carried out because police were unable to get a proper view of the van’s interior, It was later discovered that there was nothing to be concerned about.

Inspector Gary Medland, from Gatwick Police, said: “We are BILL ROACHE, Coronation Street’s Ken Barlow since day one, “strenuously” denied allegations that he raped a teenager in the Sixties.

The 81-year-old, who has played Ken Barlow in the ITV soap since its launch, has been charged with two counts of the rape of a 15-year-old girl in 1967. In a statement, written in response to the accusations, he said yesterday (Thursday): “I am astounded and deeply horrified by the extraordinary events of the last 24 hours.

“I strenuously deny the allegations and will now focus my full attention on fighting to preserve my innocence in the challenging times ahead.”

Roache was arrested

by Lancashire Police at his home in Wilmslow,

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aware that the closure of the car park caused some disruption to people travelling to and from the North Terminal by vehicle.

“But this was a most unusual event, and the safety of those visiting and working at the airport must take priority.

“However, working with the airport operator, we were able to ensure that other areas of the airport were, in the main, unaffected by the incident and flights continued as normal.”

He added: “There is nothing to link the vehicle with terrorist activity, and there is a strong possibility that the two men dumped the van as they headed for a flight.

“Enquiries are under way to establish whether this was the case, and we are obviously keen to talk to the men involved.”

Brian Carter, who was handed a 200-hour community service order, could have received a nine-month prison sentence.

He celebrated by pledging to ignore a court’s demand to repay the money.

The jobless council tenant, from Basildon, Essex, who owns two cars and has £112,000 bank savings stashed away in a secret account, said: “They’re not getting one solitary penny back off me.”

The 58-year-old swindler sneered at the legal system even further by saying he might not even fulfil the community service order.

“I’ve been doing bird for the last 45 years,” he boasted. “Do you think I would care about three months in prison? I don’t give a toss.”

He was convicted at Southend Magistrates’ Court of claiming £54,000 in income support, plus housing and council tax benefits.

His response provoked local fury. Phil Turner, deputy leader of Basildon Council, said: “You have to question the

liberal-minded magistrates who clearly felt it was in this man’s best interest not to lock him up.

“His sentence is just a slap on the wrist. Magistrates need to get a backbone.

“Hard-working taxpayers won’t understand how the courts have become so tolerant of people who criminally help themselves to benefits, and then turn around and stick two fingers up at the courts when they’re freed.”

He added: “Public opinion is demanding they are dealt with appropriately. Letting this man walk out of court so he can mock it is not appropriate.

“He has proved beyond any doubt that there is

something wrong with the system. We are a tolerant society, but there is a limit - and he has gone way beyond it.”

Basildon’s Tory MP, John Baron, said: “There is no place for benefit cheats in our society. I have always maintained we need tougher sentences for these crimes.”

And another Tory MP, Philip Davies, said: “This man should have been sent to prison and have everything taken off him, including his council house.

In court, Carter admitted conning more than £24,000 in housing and council tax benefit, and £30,000 in income support.

When confronted at his council flat Carter,

who lives alone but has a 33-year-old wife and a seven-year-old son in Thailand, was unapologetic.

“I only went guilty because it was convenient as it gets you a third off your sentence,” he said smugly.

“Bailiffs came round the other day and wanted £50,000 off me.

But they said I had nothing of any value to take away as the van hire would cost more than the items are worth.

“They are not going to get one solitary penny from me unless they take it out of my benefits.”

Carter owns a 50in plasma TV and drives a Citroen and a restored classic BMW.

Corrie star charged with rape - Hall admits indecent assaults

Cheshire, on Wednesday.

He was charged with the offences some 12 hours later and last night arrived back at his address, where a large media presence was assembled outside his home.

ITV, which broadcasts Coronation Street, said in a statement that Roache - the world’s longest-serving soap actor - would not be appearing in Corrie until legal proceedings had concluded.

Roache collected an award from Guinness World Records in 2010 for his long service in Coronation Street, having joined in 1960 and

appeared regularly ever since. He will appear at Preston Magistrates’ Court on 14th May. There was more celebrity drama yesterday when veteran BBC broadcaster Stuart Hall admitted indecently assaulting 13 girls, as young as nine.

The Crown Prosecution Service described him as an “opportunistic predator”, and nearly all his victims provided “strikingly similar accounts”.

The CPS also said the victims, among them a 10-year-old and an 11-year-old, did not know each other and that Hall’s pattern of behav-

iour was “unlawful”. The 83-year-old admitted 14 charges of indecent assault, which took place between 1967 and 1985.

The former It’s A Knockout presenter, who was also a regular football match summariser on Radio 5 Live, had previously denied any wrong-doing, telling reporters the claims were “pernicious, callous, cruel and, above all, spurious”.

But the Recorder of Preston, Judge Anthony Russell QC, told him he would be required to sign the Sex Offenders’ Register.

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World News

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London’s big three airports will have to trim airline fees HE A T H R O W , Gatwick and Stansted.

London’s three main airports, have been ordered to reduce the takeoff and landing fees they charge airlines.

Proposals by the Civil Aviation Authority (CAA) will mean airlines being charged much less for using the airports between 2014 and 2019 than they will have been from 20092014.

The aviation regulator’s move should limit the fare rises imposed on passengers using the three airports.

Over the forthcoming period, the charges should be capped at the RPI rate of inflation, minus 1.3%, says the regulator.

This is significantly less than Heathrow’s

charges from 2009-2014, which were RPI plus 7.5%.

The airport’s bosses had proposed an increase in fees from £19.33 per passenger in 2012-13 to as much as £27.30 in 2018-19.

Heathrow, which is controlled by Spain’s Ferrovial, reported a 12% rise in profit in 2012 to £1.3bn, fuelled mainly by an increase in the fees it charges airlines.

But the CAA said it had “found clear evidence of substantial market power” at Heathrow.

It added: “After a decade when prices have risen, it is now looking to encourage further investment, while improving value for passengers in other ways.”

The regulator proposed a more flexible system for Gatwick, but said that if the airline did not make acceptable proposals itself, charges would be capped at RPI plus 1%.

This is lower than the RPI plus 2% regime that has been in place at the West Sussex airport between 2009 and 2014.

And the CAA said its regulation at Stansted would take the form of monitoring charges and service quality, but stressed it would become stricter “unless prices at Stansted reduce over time”.

Gatwick bosses said the CAA’s proposals were “too demanding”, but Andrew Haines, the regulator’s chief executive, said the protection of consumers was the “core focus” of the proposals.

He added: “Few pas-

sengers flying from Heathrow, Gatwick and Stansted fail to notice their differences, so it should be no surprise that our regulatory approach also differs at each airport.

“Our proposals reflect their individual circumstances, ensure passengers are protected when they travel, and allow for continuing improvements in service and competition.”

But Heathrow bosses questioned whether the proposals were “a risk worth taking”.

A company statement read: “To stay competitive with overseas hubs like Amsterdam, Paris, Frankfurt and Dubai,

Heathrow has invested £11bn over the last 10 years.

“Over the same period, returns to shareholders have fallen well below the level anticipated by the regulator.”

But British Airways’ Willie Walsh said the proposals did not go far enough.

“Our first impression is that a 5.35% return on capital will put passenger service at risk by not attracting the necessary investment in Heathrow for the short, medium and long term,” he said.

Gatwick said the suggested RPI-plus-1% formula was “too demanding and based on unre-

alistic assumptions”.

Chief executive Stuart Wingate added: “The CAA must not hold us back through imposing heavy-handed, regulation red tape in the form of a licence and an inflexible price control, but should allow us to build on this success (of the last three years),” Stansted officials said they would study details of the CAA’s plans before responding.

The proposals, to be finalised next year, were broadly welcomed by airlines, which have been arguing against what they see as excessive charges.

The Board of Airline Representatives, representing 80 airlines, said it was encouraging that the CAA had listened to industry concerns over the need for a more flexible approach.

Chief executive Dale Keller said; “We are cautiously optimistic that the final regulation will better meet the needs of consumers and the airline industry,” But Willie Walsh, chief executive of British Airways’ parent company IAG, said the proposals did not go far enough.

“Heathrow airport is over-priced, over-rewarded and inefficient,” he said.

“And these proposals, which will result in an increase in prices, fail to address this situation.”

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New Dutch king takes over from his mum, the Queen CROWN Prince W i l l e m -A l e x a n der has become Europe’s youngest monarch following Tuesday’s abdication of the Dutch throne by his mother, Queen Beatrix.

She signed the official act of abdication in Amsterdam, enabling her eldest son the first Dutch king in more than 100 years.

The Queen, who earlier this year signalled her intent to step down, ended her 33-year reign as thousands of revellers, dressed in orange, cheered outside the Royal Palace.

And millions more watched the spectacle in the Dutch capital on television.

She now becomes Princess Beatrix and her son ascends the

throne as King WillemAlexander - the first Dutch king since Willem III died in 1890.

The 46-year-old’s popular Argentine-born wife becomes Queen Maxima and their eldest

daughter, CatharinaAmalia, will now be known as Princess of Orange and heir to the throne.

Willem-Alexander gripped the hand of his emotional mother after

they both signed the abdication document.

They then appeared together on a balcony of the Royal Palace on the city’s famous Dam Square and addressed the crowd briefly.

King Willem-Alexander paid tribute to his mother’s long reign, and they were then joined by the new Queen and their three daughters.

The investiture was later held before 2,000 guests in Amsterdam’s Nieuwe Kerk, which also serves as a joint session of the two houses of the States General - the Dutch Parliament.

The Prince of Wales and the Duchess of Cornwall were among those in the audience as the new king swore to be faithful to the constitution, and faithfully discharge the duties of his office.

Later that afternoon, the new King and Queen, together with their children, headed a royal boat parade.

In a country where public support for the royal family amounts to over 80%, the Dutch government allowed six protests to be staged around the city by anti-

monarchist groups. And it’s far from sweetness and light for the new Dutch monarch, who receives a stipend of 850,000 euros (£718,000) a year.

An online petition to see that sum reduced has now reached over 20,000 signatures - half the number required to trigger a parliamentary debate.

Organiser Anjo Clement told Sky News: “The monarchy is not democratic. It costs a lot of money. They pay no taxes and have free housing and enormous staff. And they have a hidden political power.”

Supporters argue that Queen Beatrix, during her reign, presided over a decline in the monarchy’s influence over the day-to-day running of the country.

At the same time, her son courted controversy for living an openlyprivileged life.

Sports and More Tenerife Sports and More Tenerife is a delightful fitness studio situated in Residencial Costa Sol, Costa del Silencio.

The light and airy fitness studio is unique however as it caters for those of a certain age, especially individuals who find a normal gym environment intimidating.

Currently there are approximately 50 members and sports and more are looking to increase awareness of the services that they offer.

They specialise in prevention, rehabilitation and building individual bespoke programmes, just for you; with a per-

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sonal trainer should you wish it.

It’s not a body building gym. There a whole range of classes run throughout the day including Yoga, Pilates, circuit training and even seated aerobics!

The fully trained staff have a wealth of experience, are multi-lingual and have the time to focus on you as an individual, you can do everything on a small scale especially if you suffer from joint problems, but it’s great as

you’re still exercising!

They have a qualified nutritionist on hand as well should you wish to discuss your dietary requirements and would like a weight loss programme.

It’s an ideal place to socialise, meet friends, and keep fit. Suitable for all age groups without the hype and the loud banging music.

You can pay by the class if that’s better for you, so why not come along and try a class?

Sports and more is now

offering Kids Yoga, creative movement for the younger ones, taking place on a Wednesday at 5pm.

Coming soon – Summer yoga – on the beach!

If you don’t feel comfortable in a normal gym then sports and more is for you.

Sports and more is currently open from 9.30 – 12.00 and 5.30-8.30 Monday through to Friday, 5 days per week.

They can be contacted on 922 395 999 or via their facebook page sportsandmore tenerife or email info@sportsandmore.es www.spotsandmore.es

3rd May - 9th May 2013

3rd May - 9th May 2013

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World News

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The McCanns still believe that police will find Madeleine THE parents of missing child Madeleine McCann believe they are closer to finding their daughter now.

Kate and Gerry McCann, appearing on Sky News, asked the public to remain vigilant about possible sightings.

A police review into her disappearance, exactly six years ago today (Friday), is making “excellent progress” and has given the couple renewed hope.

Madeleine was nearly four when she vanished from the family’s Portugese holiday apartment, in Praia da Luz, on 3rd May 3 2007, while her parents dined with friends at a nearby restaurant.

“With the review the Met have been doing over the last two years, I think we are closer to finding out what happened, just because more pieces of the jigsaw are being filled in,” said Gerry.

“But for Kate and I, until we find Madeleine - or the person responsible - then we’re still miles away. But we certainly feel the police are making excellent progress.”

They were given another big lift on Wednesday when Ptime Minister David Cameron pledged his ongoing support.

The couple, who are attending a church service in their village today to mark the anniversary, said they still struggled on various

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occasions, including Madeleine’s birthday she will be 10 later this month.

Yet they are managing to cope with her absence. “It’s a horrible, confusing, uncomfortable situation to be in,” said Kate.

“As time’s gone on, we’ve obviously got stronger - and you do adapt to living in that situation.”

She said their home, in Rothley, Leicestershire, was full of photos and other memories of Madeleine, and the couple were kept occupied with their twins.

“Twins do everything that other eight-yearolds do, and they’ve been a tremendous source of pleasure and joy for us,” added Gerry.

“They’re so adaptable, and it’s a matter of fact to them that they’ve grown up with their older sister missing.

“She should be here and we should celebrate with her, but we still celebrate her - and her being part of our lives.”

The couple thanked the public for their “tremendous support”, and urged people travelling abroad to remain vigilant about possible sightings of Madeleine.

Kate stressed: “Someone knows - not just the people involved in the crime. Other people will know as well, or will be strongly suspicious.”

Her husband added: “The key message is that if someone thinks they’ve seen Madeleine, contact police straight away.”

In Google and God we trust!

WE believe in God and Google alike!

That’s the message conveyed by a new survey, involving more 2,000 adults in the UK.

The Future of Britain report reveals that the search engine and religion are ranked equal when it comes to institutions and organisations trusted by people.

True, they are behind the NHS and the police, but ahead of banks and insurance companies.

The findings are part of a year-long research into the changing shape of British society following the economic slump.

The survey also embraces ongoing changes to the country’s population and demographics.

Some 17% of people said they had the most faith in Google and in religious institutions.

But perhaps not surprisingly, the young generation, who have been raised on Google,

trust the search engine even more.

No fewer than 28% of those in the 16-24 age group find it the most trustworthy, compared with 17% for religious organisations.

And in the main, Britons find Google more honest than banks and insurance companies Chris Worrell, insight director of OMD UK, the media agency behind the report, told Sky News Online: “It really reflects people’s interests.

“People use Google on a daily basis, if not more, and perhaps they are not engaged with

religious institutions in the same way they used to be.”

Despite the recent horsemeat scandal, the results showed that more people put their faith in supermarkets (19%) than the search engine or religious organisations.

Overall, though, the National Health Service came out as most trustworthy, with a 37% share of votes, and politicians - again, not surprisingly- the least believable, at 3%.

Just 9% of people said they trusted Facebook, while banks, utility companies and insurance firms also

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came off badly, at 7%, 6% and 5% respectively.

Mr Worrell said trust levels were low across the board in light of the long economic downturn, with Brits having little faith in many of the major companies and organisations which dominate their lives.

But he believed it was not surprising to see Google as being more trustworthy than internet rival Facebook.

That’s because the social networking site is newer, and people are keenly aware that it needs to make money because of its highprofile IPO (Initial Public Offering).

Other results highlighted the country’s economic fears, with 96% of those surveyed concerned about the high cost of living. And 40% of people says they are selling their possessions in order to cope with their finances.

Meanwhile, almost half (46%) of the 35-44 age group believe they will be worse off than their parents.

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Community News

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Rehomed Popov is now Raggy...

Live Arico news AFTER last week’s article about giving dogs a second chance, Popov the labrador was adopted. His new name is Raggy, and we wish him and his new owner, Sam all, the best.

This week’s featured dog is Misty, a 13-weekold pup, who will be medium-sized when fully grown.

She is fully vaccinated and chipped, and is very playful. A 70-euro

adoption fee will be payable at Hospivet Sur to cover the cost of the vaccinations, and the changing of the microchip details into your name.

Call Sue on 629 388 102 for more information about our dogs for adoption.

Pool and darts KO events We are staging our first Pool and Darts knockout competition on Sunday, 26th May at the Terrace

Bar, Amarilla Golf.

Registrations will take place from 12 noon, or you can pre-register by calling Sharon Edens on 671 783 117.

So polish off your cue, sharpen your darts and come down for an afternoon of fun.

It’s just five euros an entry for each event, with the winners and runner-ups receiving cash prizes.

Bargains galore Come and browse in

our charity shops at Los Cristianos, Calle Reveron, near the children’s playpark, open between 10am4pm daily.

Alternatively, have a look at Siobhan’s shop in San Eugenio, near Amandas Bar and opposite Hotel La Nina.

Both shops are closed Sundays.

You will be surprised at the high-quality goods available at knockdown prices.

Another day of animal magic!

SUNDAY’S second joint charity venture by Cats Welfare, Live Aricoand K9 was a huge success.

The event, at Our Place, Costa del Silencio, was extremely wellattended and a great time was had by all.

The afternoon included the talented Alaya Shonyata (heat winner of Tenerife Loves Karaoke), Vicky Denton, Martin McCall, Mark (performing his last gig before returning to Ireland), guitar/vocalist Alfie B, Steve Delsey, Storm Duo and Mickey Glamz, who had the dance floor

full Our thanks go to Aidy Evans for keeping things on track, and filling in with some songs.

Wendy, from Cats Welfare, made sure no one was missed when selling the raffle tickets.

Many thanks to Superior Foods, Our Place, and everyone who donated prizes for the raffle and tombola.

The final 100 euros was raised in 10 minutes by Wendi and Live Arico’s Sharon Edens.

There were plenty of furry friends there receiving cuddles from everyone, including Luci, one of the Guaza mountain pups who has grown into a fantastic dog but still looking for her forever home.

A total of 545 euros was raised, which will be split equally between the three charities.

Thanks to all who attended, supported, and of course the hardworking volunteers and bar staff.

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It’s all a bit too much!

Accion del Sol news SUNDAY’S Fun Walk was a great success, with more people joining us every month, and the dogs having so much enjoyment and loving all the attention.

It left this little pup (pictured) so worn out from all the excitement that it fell asleep en route!

On a serious note, Accion would like to remind you all that as well as registering your dog at your local Ayunimento (Town Hall), regardless of breed or size, the following dogs MUST have an additional Dangerous Dog Licence: *Pit Bull Terrier *Staffordshire Bull Terrier *American Staffordshire Terrier *Rottweiler *Dogo Argentino *Fila Brasileiro *Tosa Inu *Akita Inu Accion del Sol has a strict policy on adopting a potentially-dangerous dog from the refuge, and you do need this licence before taking your dog home.

It goes without saying that the staff here will be happy to help and advise you on obtaining this licence.

You will see from the illustration which

breeds are classified as potentially dangerous and need a special licence.

They are also subject to strict controls, such as being muzzled when being walked - only one at a time - and owned by someone over 18 who does not have a police record.

You might think you would never be stopped, but police everywhere are being more vigilant about this problem and are prone to conducting spot-checks.

You first step to getting the necessary licence is to go to the SAC office at your local town hall and request a form known as Solicitud de Inscripcion en el Censo de Animales Domesticos

Y/O Potencialmente Peligrosos.

You will need various papers, such as your NIE and passport, and your dog’s micro-chipping evidence, etc.

The document is in Spanish.

Next, surprisingly, you have to take yourself to your local centro medico for a medical, which will determine whether you are fit to keep a potentially dangerous dog (eyesight, blood pressure, reactions, etc), and why you want one.

You will also be asked to take a questionnaire involving no fewer than 60 questions and, at 53 euros, this is the main cost involved.

A visit to the Mapfre building in Santa Cruz is also necessary to obtain

a certificate, which will eventually be returned to you confirming you have no criminal record.

If you do have one, you will not be allowed to get a licence.

You also need to take out dog insurance with a minimum cover of 120,000 euros (on your home insurance or a separate policy) and you’ll will need to sign and complete another form from the SAC (Peticion de Antecedentes Penales de Registro Central de Penados y Rebeldes).

Eventually, you take all the papers, microchipping document, inoculation verifications, etc, back to the SAC and you will receive a preliminary certificate.

Subject to all the paperwork being correct, your licence will be issued a month or so later.

As you can imagine, this whole process is lengthy and complicated, but it is the correct way to get your potentiallydangerous dog legalised.

Sadly, many owners just don’t bother.

You should also be

aware that if someone else is walking your dog and it attacks a person or another animal, it is still your responsibility - and yours alone!

Your premises should also display a “dangerous dog” sign and you must always carry with you the licence and the animal’s paperwork.

You must also take these steps if you want

to adopt a dangerous dog breed from a refuge, and you should not be allowed to take it away until you have the paperwork.

It is quite an eye-opener to discover the lengthy procedures, which take around two months.

But the law is the law and the only way not to fall foul of it is to comply with it!

Snap up that Lions’ bargain DON’T forget San Miguel Lions Club’s monthly Auction tonight (Friday) at Costa del Silencio.

It has been held at Bar Kiosco Amadors for years, and there are always heaps of items on show, from all types of textiles to furniture to electrical items to toys.

And, says Lions’ President Ralph Solomon:

“There are things that wouldn’t even cross your mind.”

Viewing starts at 7.15pm, and the bidding begins 15 minutes later!

Drinks are available, from spirits to coffee, and the Amador is situated at the Coral Mar end of the main Silencio road, just set back from that and opposite Bar Albatross, above the Lions’ Charity Shop.

May madness at Aladdin’s Cave ALADDIN’S Cave, in Los Toscales, is planning a discount “RED SPOT” day next Saturday (11th May).

The store will be open from 9am to 2pm, and all items marked with a red spot will

carry a whopping 30% reduction in price.

This will apply to all second-hand furniture and other decorative items, while antiques and artwork will attract a discount of between 10-20%.

So for that bargain

you’ve been waiting for, pop along for a browse around in what has become known as the Island’s most unique shop.

As David ‘The Real Deal’ Dickinson would say: “See you there, bargain hunters!”

Estrellas in the pink for charity ESTRELLAS Theatre School are collaborating with Amate on Sunday, 12th May, to raise funds for the breast-cancer research charity.

The “pink” event is being held at Omni Beach, Punta Brava – the first time Estrellas will have staged a show in the North – and it promises to be a fun

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3rd May - 9th May 2013

day for those appearing and for the audience, young and old.

It features Estrellitas, The Sleeping Beauty, some solo performances, Hip Hop, songs from Hairspray and much, more! And it gets underway at 2pm.

Tickets cost nine euros for adults (to include paella) and six

3rd May - 9th May 2013

euros for children up to eight years (with paella, popcorn and ice-cream).

It will cost just three euros for those who simply want to watch the show without food.

For tickets, call Mo on 647 844 794, or email mo@ estrellastheatreschool. com

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Feature HEAT EIGHT, if I’m being brutally honest, was a daunting prospect; our first Saturday heat, up against The Voice and Britain’s Got Talent.

And at a venue where many patrons had been to spend the day at the Help for Heroes event in Playa de Las Americas.

We arrived at Clouseau’s, in Palm Mar, ready for a challenge.

And boy, was it a challenge!

Owner Angela welcomed us with open arms and a hopeful smile. We had virtually no contestants, but that was not going to stop us.

Combining gentle persuasion, the promise of trophies and TLK glory, and a lot of downright cheekiness, we managed to get enough to start the competition.

Oasis Fm supersalesperson Jo Rham rounded up a few, and I managed to shame others into “having a go”, despite the initial hard stares from some.

It was clear that this was going to be no ordinary heat; it was more a karaoke night ‘just for laughs’ but with a chance, ultimately, for one entrant to win 1,000 euros.

Jo and Ian Lennard were the only judges because of a staff shortage - both Angela

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Pete’s treat on a rocky night Tenerife Loves Karaoke

and compère Andy were required to work the bar, along with Chelsea and new girl Elle.

We may have been short on singers, but there were plenty of drinkers (some of whom ended up singing, too.

The bar must have had Dutch courage on draught!

Up first was Luke, who chose the Wilson Pickett karaoke classic Mustang Sally. He gave his all, and right from the off, the gathered throng chimed in with “ride, Sally, ride,’ and they didn’t stop.

Luke’s mate, David, went next, and I have to say his version of Bill Withers’ Ain’t no Sunshine was interesting, for want of a better adjective.

He managed the 22 repetitions of the lyric “I know” in a single breath, and was positively blue in the face at the end.

Barmaid Chelsea went third and chose a song we had heard the previous week. Ellie Goulding’s cover of Your

Song was delivered well and, had there been an award for “Most sparkly shorts,” Chelsea would have won.

Press-ganged into competing next was entrepreneur Drew, from Cheshire, who chose Don McLean’s Vincent.

This just happened to be judge Ian’s favourite song of all time, so he was expecting big things. Drew ambled through to the end, but at least he had a go (which is what karaoke is all about).

Compère Andy, because of the small numbers, filled in for the fifth spot. He chose Louis Armstrong’s version of Blueberry Hill and tried his best to emulate his “cousin” (his words, not mine).

Next up was Ian, a regular from Clouseau’s who had recently suffered bereavement.

After two song changes (the lyrics possibly setting him off) he did the *ahem* sensible thing and chose Baggy

Trousers by Madness.

It was the second time a contestant ran out of breath, but his rendition was word-perfect.

Pete, from the Maypole near Birmingham, took to the stage next, and it was like a breath of fresh air. Pete sang UB40’s Kingston Town really well, and proved to be the force to be reckoned with on the night.

Pete’s mate, Pat, was next. Nobody was prepared for what was to come. Pat wanted to sing Leonard Cohen’s version of Hallelujah but it wasn’t available.

I tried my best to offer him the Rufus Wainwright version, but he declined, opting instead for the Jeff Buckley album version.

Yes, all 7mins 9secs of it!

You’d think that a oneminute introduction would prepare you for coming in on time (in usual circumstances).

But no, Pat managed to start late, and stayed that way throughout.

It must be said that his pant swinging did redeem him somewhat in the numerous instrumental breaks.

Super cyclist May, from Bowden in Cheshire, (owner of the hardest stare earlier) went ninth. She chose Inner Circle’s Sweat (a la la long).

She had the whole

terrace swaying along with her calves of steel and biceps to match. It was a great performance, particularly considering her early reluctance.

Luke returned to the stage next, along with Lisa, and they performed one of THE karaoke classic duets in the B52’s Love Shack.

Their dance routine was sublime (if a little risqué), and their vocals were superb.

Apologies for the lack of photos of this performance, as the judges were too busy laughing to remember their camera duties.

Late-entrant Sammy was our penultimate contestant. Sammy, a resident of Palm Mar, had just returned from working on Golf del Sur. He was quick to choose Robson and Jerome’s version of I Believe and delivered a solid performance. I believe the expression I have used previously is “game on”.

Making up the numbers to our maximum 12 entrants (we did it!), we saw the return of Pete and Pat. The Lighthouse Family’s Ocean Drive was their selection and, by this time, people were dancing. Unheard of at TLK this year!

The computer scoring whirred into action and spat out the three finalists; May, Pete and Sammy.

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Sammy went first, selecting Neil Diamond’s Love on the Rocks, and he sang it really well, with a hint of the Diamond huskiness at times.

May was drawn to go second and, despite rushing off to the loos singing Da Doo Ron Ron, she came back and chose It’s Raining Men. The range proved slightly too wide, but she persevered and, yes, there were dancers again.

Pete showed great versatility with his sing-off song, choosing the Drifters’ Saturday Night at the Movies, in which he demonstrated not only great pitch and a richness of voice, but also a well-controlled falsetto. Dancers, you ask? Yes, lots of them, I reply.

That drew the competition to a close. The results soon followed; May was third and Sammy second, leaving Pete as the slightly surprised but well-deserved winner.

Pete Bruce will be back for the final on 1st June, supported by his mini-entourage, and even May and Drew (if they can get flights and time off).

This was the most fun I have had at TLK 2013 so far. Nobody took it too seriously, yet we still managed to find a full contestant list, and a winner worthy of a place in the final.

I should also apologise for using the sense of humour I believe I may have found in the gutter!

Remaining three heats 9th May: Terrace Bar, Amarilla Golf 16th May: Dreamer’s, Los Cristianos 23rd May: Leonardo’s, Las Americas *The final will be held at Showtime, Karting Las Americas on Saturday, 1st June. And I still wouldn’t like to call it because the standard has been ridiculously high.

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3rd May - 9th May 2013

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Don't Miss...

The Hoarder Next Door See page 28

For the Love of Dogs See page 34

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3rd May - 9th May 2013

3rd May - 9th May 2013

Murder on the Home Front Thursday 9 May, 21.00, ITV1 Visceral, detailed, blackly comic and hugely entertaining crime drama set in the dead centre of the birth of modern forensics - the London Blitz of World War II. Based on the memoirs of Molly Lefebure, the secretary to the Home Office Pathologist, Keith Simpson, this addictive drama will show a side of this much exploited period not often seen in television drama.

The increased body count of the war allowed the development of forensics, as we know them today. But this is a world pre DNA profiling and consequently far more inventive, contentious and taboo breaking.

If you thought that post CSI, Waking the Dead and Silent Witness audiences knew everything thing there was to know about forensics - then think again.

When young women are found murdered DI Freddy Wilkins believes the obvious suspect is the vulnerable loner, Wilfred Ziegler as a result of the swastikas carved on the victims’ tongues. Dr Lennox Collins the passionate and brilliant Home Office Pathologist and Molly Cooper, his vivacious young secretary have their doubts and employ ground breaking forensic techniques to ensure the right man is brought to justice. However, Lennox soon learns that not only is he fighting a battle to modernise the way in which crimes are solved, but he’s also clashing with a government who will go to any lengths to ensure the country’s morale is sustained – even cover up a murder. Despite its dark themes this is a vibrant, life affirming drama full of characters loving life.

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TV Guide

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TV Guide

Friday Friday Friday Friday Friday Friday 3rd May 06:00........................... Daybreak

09:15 .......................Fake Britain

06:00 ................. Homes Under the Hammer

10:00 ................... Homes Under the Hammer

07:00 .............Don't Get Done, Get Dom

09:25 ........................ The Jeremy Kyle Show

11:00 ...............Don't Get Done, Get Dom

07:45 ...........Animal Frontline

10:30 .................... This Morning

08:15 ........................ Saints and Scroungers

11:25 ............................ITV News

06:00 ............................Breakfast

Engine Trouble. Dominic Littlewood comes to the aid of ordinary people who are having a consumer nightmare. Three weeks after taking her car in for a routine service, Angie was driving along when her engine suddenly failed. She believes a mistake was made during the service which caused the car to suddenly lose all its oil, but the garage who carried out the service say it is nothing to do with them. It is up to Dom to get to the bottom of what happened and try and get Angie back on the road.

Plus, do we have more rights buying online than on the high street? Rani Price hits the streets to reveal all, and we hear how one man took on his bank after thousands of pounds of saving suddenly went AWOL.

11:45 .............Animal Frontline 12:15.................... Bargain Hunt 13:00........... BBC News at One 13:30 ......... BBC London News 13:45 .............................. Doctors 14:15 ............................Escape to the Country 15:00......................... Perfection 15:45 ..............The Hairy Bikers' Food Tour of Britain 16:30 ........ Antiques Road Trip 17:15............................ Pointless 18:00......... BBC News at Six 18:30 .... BBC London News 19:00 ...........The One Show 19:30... A Question of Sport 20:00 ................ EastEnders 20:30 .............Would I Lie W C to You? choice 21:00 .................. Have I Got News for You 21:30 ...........Not Going Out 22:00 ....... BBC News at Ten 22:25..... BBC London News

09:00 .................... Great British Menu 10:00 .................................World Championship Snooker 12:00 ........................Vote 2013 13:00................................. World Championship Snooker 14:00 ........................Vote 2013 15:00 .................................World Championship Snooker 17:00........................ Vote 2013 18:00 .................Eggheads 18:30 ......................Flog It! 19:00 ........................ World Championship Snooker 21:00 ............... The Genius of Marie Curie The Woman Who Lit Up the World

22:35................ The Graham Norton Show

22:00 ..............................QI

23:20 .........The Wright Way

23:05 .............. Later... with Jools Holland

23:50 ................ Dark Water

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Matt Allwright looks into the work of fraud investigators determined to catch those who steal from the public purse. When money is tight and you need to feed your children or pay your rent, the benefits system is there to help, as Maxine Green knew only too well. But when her name came up during an unrelated investigation, Havering Council soon discovered a 168,000-pound fraud behind this seemingly single mum.

And Matt meets Chris Lewis, who found himself in dire straits after a business venture failed when he left the forces.

With family life as he knew it threatened, could Chris find the help he so desperately needed to succeed in civvy street?

22:30 ............... Newsnight

08:30...............................Lorraine

11:30.................... This Morning 12:30.................. Loose Women 13:30 .............................ITV News and Weather 14:00 .................Rory Bremner's Great British Views Rory Bremner visits the rugged beautiful coast of Northumberland including the picturesque Berwick-upon-Tweed with its three famous bridges. He visits a local honey farm, and takes a trip to Chillingham Castle

15:00 ........................ Dickinson's Real Deal 16:00 ....................Tipping Point 17:00 ..........................The Chase 18:00 ...... ITV News London 18:30 ............. ITV News and Weather 19:00................ Emmerdale 19:30 ..... Coronation Street 20:00 ....... The Martin Lewis Money Show Martin Lewis and Saira Khan show how to reclaim hundreds of pounds if you have been sold the wrong type of bank account, learn self-defence when you go shopping, and how to get your money back if things go wrong.

06:10......................... The Hoobs 07:05 ............ According to Jim 07:30 .............Everybody Loves Raymond 08:25................................. Frasier 10:00 ...The Secret Millionaire 11:00......... Location, Location, Location 12:00 ..............Channel 4 News 12:05 ...... Come Dine with Me 12:35 .............What's Cooking?

13:45...................... Four Rooms 14:45 ...................... Countdown 15:30 .............. 1001 Things You Should Know 16:00 ............... Deal or No Deal 17:00 ..................... Five Minutes to a Fortune 18:00 ............The Simpsons 18:30................... Hollyoaks 19:00......... Channel 4 News 19:30 .... Unreported World 20:00... Come Dine with Me 21:00....Ben Earl: Trick Artist 22:00.................... Alan Carr: Chatty Man 23:05......10 O'Clock Live CW

06:00.....................Children's TV

19:00 ............... Great Movie Mistakes 2: The Sequel

06:00 ................. Good Morning Sports Fans

19:15.................Doctor Who

07:00 ................. Good Morning Sports Fans 08:00 ................... Super League Superstars

ch oi ce

20:30 ..... Coronation Street

20:00......... World's Craziest Fools

21:00 ........................ The Ice Cream Girls

20:30............... Snog, Marry, Avoid?

Conclusion of the three-part drama. When Poppy is arrested for approaching Serena, she hits an all time low. Serena's life also takes an unexpected turn for the worse when her identity as the second ice cream girl is exposed to Evan. Devastated by his wife's betrayal, Evan leaves taking Vee with him. With nothing left to lose, Serena decides it is time to confront the past once and for all, and she visits Poppy in detention.

22:00 ................ ITV News at Ten and Weather 22:35 ...............The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift

3rd May - 9th May 2013

21:00 .............. Sun, Sex and Suspicious Parents Series in which teenagers take their first summer holiday abroad without their parents, who are secretly watching all that unfolds. Two very different teens jet off to the holiday resort of Kos. Chani doesn't have to lift a finger at home as mum Kim waits on her hand and foot. And until now, mum has been happy to keep her head firmly in the sand when it comes to her daughter's wild social life.

22:00 .... Impractical Jokers 22:30................. EastEnders 23:00................ Family Guy 23:45 .......... American Dad!

09:00........................ Tickety Toc 09:15 ..............The Wright Stuff 11:10 ................... Nature Shock 12:10......... 5 News Lunchtime 12:15 ........... Iceland: Ashcloud Apocalypse 13:15..............Home and Away 13:45...................... Neighbours 14:15 ................................CSI: NY 15:10 ...............My Neighbour's Keeper 17:00 .......................5 News at 5 17:30 ...................... Neighbours 18:00........ Home and Away 18:30........... 5 News at 6.30 19:00..... The Removal Men 20:00 ........... Eddie Stobart: Trucks and Trailers

06:00 ....................Super League Superstars

06:00 ...............Dog the Bounty Hunter

06:00 ........Nothing to Declare

06:30 ............................European Tour Golf

06:30 ...............Dog the Bounty Hunter

07:00 ................................. Maury

10:30 ................ Asian Tour Golf

07:00 ............. Brainiac: Science Abuse

12:30............... Football League Semi-Final Play-Off

06:30 ........Nothing to Declare 08:00 ................................. Maury 09:00 ....................The Real A&E

08:00 ............. Brainiac: Science Abuse

09:30 ................Criminal Minds

18:00 ................ NBA Action

09:00 ...........NCIS: Los Angeles

18:30 ........Barclays Premier League

11:30 ............. CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

13:00 ....................Hawaii Five-0

14:00 ........European Tour Golf

Premier League Preview. A look ahead to the weekend's Barclays Premier League games, with footage from the key press conferences, interviews with players and managers and crucial team news.

19:00 ............. Pro Contract The Football Dream 19:30 .........Football League Semi-Final Play-Off

10:00 ...........NCIS: Los Angeles

10:30 ................Criminal Minds

15:00 ................... Stargate SG-1

13:00 ............. CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

17:00................... The Simpsons

14:00 ................Criminal Minds

17:30 ................... John Bishop's Only Joking

16:00 ............................ It's Me or the Dog USA

18:00............. John Bishop's Only Joking

17:00 .................................Airline

18:30 ............ The Simpsons

18:00... Nothing to Declare

19:00 ............ The Simpsons 19:30................... Futurama

17:30 .................................Airline 18:30 ... Nothing to Declare

22:00 ................ The Fantasy Football Club

20:00 .................The Middle

19:00 ........CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

20:30 .......... Modern Family

23:00 ........Barclays Premier League

20:00 ................Elementary

21:00 ................. Revolution

21:00 ......... Criminal Minds

23:30 ...... Pro Contract - The Football Dream

22:00 .........An Idiot Abroad 23:00 ....... Spartacus: Blood and Sand

22:00 ......................... Chase 23:00 .........................Bones

07:00 ...............................Carpool

06:00 ........................ Iconoclasts

07:10 ................... Dragons' Den

07:00 ..........................................ER

08:10 ...........................Fifth Gear

08:00 .......................Blue Bloods

08:35 ...........................Fifth Gear

09:00 .......Star Trek: Enterprise

09:00 ...........The Gadget Show

10:00 ..........................................ER

09:30 ...........The Gadget Show

11:00 .......................Blue Bloods

10:00 .............................Top Gear

12:00....... Star Trek: Enterprise

10:30..................... Super Rugby Union

11:00 .............................Top Gear

13:00.................................. House

12:00 ................ Massive Moves

14:00.................................. House

12:30 .............. The Rugby Club

13:00 .............................Top Gear

15:00....................... Blue Bloods

14:00 ....................... Footballers' Football Show

15:00 ....................... Traffic Cops

16:00....... Star Trek: Enterprise

16:00................. Massive Moves

15:30 .....................Super Rugby Union

17:00 ..........................................ER

17:00 .............................Top Gear

18:00 .........................House

17:30..................... Super Rugby Union

18:00 .................... Top Gear

19:00......................... House

19:00................ Traffic Cops

20:00 ............... Blue Bloods

20:00........................... Suits

21:00 .............Oliver Stone's Untold History of the United States

06:00 ........................Emmerdale 06:55 ............. Planet's Funniest Animals 07:25 ........................ The Jeremy Kyle Show US 08:10 .....You've Been Framed!

08:40 ..........................udge Judy 09:05 ... The Only Way is Essex 10:35 .....The Real Housewives of Atlanta 11:35 ................. The Millionaire Matchmaker 12:30 ........................Emmerdale 13:30 ........................Judge Judy 14:00...The Jeremy Kyle Show 16:10 .....The Real Housewives of Atlanta 17:05 ................. The Millionaire Matchmaker 18:00 .........The Jeremy Kyle Show US 19:00...You've Been Framed!

20:00 .............Totally You've Been Framed!

21:00 ............ The Mentalist 22:00 ........CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 22:55 ........CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 23:55 ..... Inside Hollywood

08:30..................... Super Rugby Union

19:30........... Rugby League 22:00......... World Wrestling Entertainment Late Night Smackdown

3rd May - 9th May 2013

21:00 ...........................QI XL 22:00 ......................... Extras 22:40 ..........Mock the Week 23:20 ....................Mongrels

22:20 ..................... Banshee 23:40 ......................... Treme

W C choice Would I Lie to You? BBC1, 20:30

Rob Brydon is back in the host's chair for the seventh series of the comedy panel show. And, as ever, David Mitchell and Lee Mack are the lightning-quick team captains.

Over the course of each show, celebrity guests reveal amazing stories about themselves, some of which are true and some of which are not. The aim of the game is to fool the opposition into mistaking fact for fiction and fiction for fact. In this episode, Lee and David are joined by Rhod Gilbert, Vernon Kay, Dara O Briain and Denise Van Outen.

10 O'Clock Live Channel 4, 23:05

Channel 4's flagship satirical current affairs show returns for a new eight-part series. David Mitchell, Charlie Brooker, Lauren Laverne and Jimmy Carr reunite to shine an uncomfortably bright light on the week's events and give an alternative take on the news.

Led by the presenting team's collective talents as comics, performers and commentators, the series delivers a witty, fresh and intelligent take on the news, current issues and events.

Page 23

TV Guide

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Saturday 06:00.............................Breakfast 10:00 ............................. Saturday Kitchen Live 11:30 .....................Nigel Slater's Simple Suppers 12:00 ..........................BBC News 12:10......... BBC London News 12:15 .................Football Focus Dan Walker, Martin Keown and Robbie Savage preview a big weekend of football action with all the latest news, views and big-name interviews as the exciting domestic season enters its final stages. Time is running out for the Premier League clubs battling hard to beat the drop; Reading go to Fulham while, just round the corner in west London, QPR play host to Arsenal. Elsewhere, Wigan are at West Brom and Sunderland's match against Stoke on Monday could have a huge impact for both clubs.

Plus a preview of the Merseyside derby, as Liverpool and Everton seek to end the season on a high.

13:00 ...................................World Championship Snooker 16:30........................ Final Score 17:20 ............................ Pointless 18:10 .................. BBC News 18:20 .... BBC London News 18:30 ............... Doctor Who 19:15 .............. The National Lottery: Who Dares Wins

Saturday

06:00................................... This is BBC Two

06:00 .................................Special Agent Oso

06:55.................................... Up in the World

06:10 .................................Special Agent Oso

08:25 ................... The Early Bird

06:25 .............................The Hive

10:00 ...................................World Championship Snooker

06:35 .............................The Hive

12:00........................... University Challenge 12:30 ....................Just a Minute 13:00 .............................. MotoGP 14:00 .........................EastEnders Omnibus 15:50 ................................... Coast Coast ventures out to new territory, the astonishing man-made shoreline of the Netherlands. Nick Crane explores how ingenious Dutch engineers created massive coastal defences following the great North Sea flood in 1953 which killed thousands of people in the Netherlands and Britain. Nick also discovers how, during the Second World War, traitors from the British Indian Army took part in the Nazi occupation of the tiny isle of Texel. This remarkable remote outpost in the far north of the Netherlands was later the unlikely site for the last battle in Europe of the Second World War. Mark Horton reveals the age old skills that have made the Dutch the Grand Masters at creating new living space from the sea.

Mark explores the greatest land grab scheme of all, an audacious 40 year plan to wall off the sea and drain away the water from an area bigger than Greater London. And Miranda Krestovnikoff experiences how the Dutch delight in devouring raw herring as a seaside snack.

16:30 ...................................World Championship Snooker

Saturday Numbers for 4 May are: Bonus Ball

20:05 ............. The Voice UK 21:25..................... Casualty 22:15 .................. BBC News 22:30 ...... Match of the Day

Page 24

17:30................................. Flog It! 18:30................. Dad's Army 19:00 ..........................World Championship Snooker 21:30 ...........................QI XL

06:40 ............................Dino Dan

TV Guide

www.canarianweekly.com

Saturday

Saturday

4th

May

06:10 ........................ The Hoobs

06:00.....................Children's TV

06:00.........European Tour Golf

06:00 ....... Don't Stop Me Now

06:00 ........Nothing to Declare

06:35 ........................... Caterham Motorsport

09:15.................................. Toby's Travelling Circus

10:00 ......... Sky Sports Classics

06:30 ........Nothing to Declare

07:00 ..... FIM Superbike World Championship

09:30.... Roary the Racing Car

10:15 .............IRB Sevens World Series Rugby

07:00 ..................Chris and Wes: Let's Do This

09:45 ........................Jelly Jamm

07:30 ........Nothing to Declare

07:25............. Mobil 1 The Grid

14:00........ Premiership Rugby

07:30 ..................Chris and Wes: Let's Do This

10:00.......... The Mr Men Show

07:55........... The Morning Line

17:00 ..................Rugby League

10:15................ Power Rangers: Super Samurai

18:55...................... Football

06:55.............................Dino Dan

09:00 .............Everybody Loves Raymond

07:05............................ Canimals 07:15 ............................ Canimals

08:00 .............................Diversity 09:00 ...............World Wrestling Entertainment Superstars

07:00 ........Nothing to Declare 08:00 .............Ghost Whisperer 09:00 ............................ It's Me or the Dog USA 10:00............................ It's Me or the Dog USA

10:00 ....................... Soccer A.M.

10:00 .................................Frasier

10:50 ......................Batman: The Brave and the Bold

11:00 .....The Big Bang Theory

11:15 ...........Inside Hollywood

13:00 ........................The Middle

11:00....................... The Biggest Loser USA

07:20................................. Almost Naked Animals

12:05 .................. The Simpsons

11:20............... Frontline Police

13:30........................ The Middle

13:00 .......................Fat Families

07:35 ..............................Ultimate Spider-Man

12:35 ... Heston's Titanic Feast

12:20 .......... Emergency Bikers

14:00........................ The Middle

14:00 ...........................Sing Date

13:40 ........... Channel 4 Racing

13:20................ Ben Fogle: New Lives in the Wild

14:30 ........................The Middle

15:00 ....................... The Biggest Loser USA

14:25 .........Avalanche Express

15:30.........................The Middle

08:00 ...................................Jessie 08:25.............................ITV News 08:30 ..................Saturday Farm 09:25 ........................ The Jeremy Kyle Show US 10:20 ............... My Tasty Travels with Lynda Bellingham 11:20......... Murder, She Wrote 12:20............................. ITV News and Weather 12:35 ...................Fool Britannia

16:10 ...... Come Dine with Me 16:40 ...... Come Dine with Me 17:10 ...... Come Dine with Me 17:40...... Come Dine with Me 18:10... Come Dine with Me 18:40 ........ Channel 4 News 19:00 ............ Sarah Beeny's Selling Houses 20:00 .......... Grand Designs 21:00................Star Trek

CW

ch oi ce

23:25 ..............Premonition

13:05 .........All Star Mr and Mrs

12:00 ......... Diversity in Dublin

15:00 ........................The Middle

16:10 .............. Breakheart Pass

16:00 ................ Modern Family

18:00....... 5 News Weekend

16:30 ................ Modern Family

18:05 ............... Jesse Stone: Stone Cold

18:00............. The Simpsons 19:00 ................... Futurama

19:30 ........................... NCIS

19:30................. The Middle

20:20 ........................... NCIS 21:20 ..........Law and Order: Criminal Intent

20:00......... An Idiot Abroad 21:00...................... Football

22:15.......... Law and Order: Special Victims Unit

23:00 ........ Football League

06:00.......FIFA Futbol Mundial

07:00 .........................Bush Pilots

06:30 .............................Ringside

07:45............................... Carpool

07:30 ..............Barclays Premier League

08:10 .............................Top Gear

08:00 ........................Champions League Weekly

11:00.......... Lizard Lick Towing

21:00 .............The Day After Tomorrow

17:00 ........Nothing to Declare 17:30 ........Nothing to Declare 18:00.... Nothing to Declare 18:30.... Nothing to Declare 19:00 ........CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 20:00.................. CSI: Miami 21:00.................. CSI: Miami 22:00 ...................Ladyboys

23:20 ................. Revolution

23:00 .............Supernatural

06:00 ............. Richard E Grant's Hotel Secrets 07:00 .............................. Seinfeld 07:30 .............................. Seinfeld 08:00 ............................The Pitch 09:00 ........................... Inside the Actors Studio 10:00............................... Inside...

11:00 ............. Richard E Grant's Hotel Secrets 12:00.......................................... ER 13:00.......................................... ER 14:00.......................................... ER 15:00 .......................Blue Bloods 18:00 .................... Star Trek: Enterprise 20:00....... Richard E Grant's Hotel Secrets 21:00 ............The Following 22:00 ..................... Banshee 23:20 .... Boardwalk Empire

06:00 ........................ Coronation Street Omnibus

14:05................. River Monsters 15:10 ..........................The Chase 16:10 ........ Midsomer Murders 17:45............ ITV News London 18:15................ You've Been Framed! Top 100 Weddings 19:15 ...................... Britain's Got Talent Ant and Dec host Britain's biggest talent competition as judges Simon Cowell, Amanda Holden, Alesha Dixon and David Walliams take in another round of weird and wonderful auditions.

Which of this week's performers will manage to impress the quartet with their skill and determination? A massive cash prize and the chance to take the stage at the Royal Variety Performance will soon be one step closer for a handful of unique and talented acts.

22:15.............The United CW 20:15 ....................The Cube States choice 21:20.............. The Jonathan of Television: Ross Show America in Primetime 22:20 .................... ITV News 23:15....................... Sin City 22:35 ............. Basic Instinct

3rd May - 9th May 2013

19:00 ............Pop's Greatest Dance Crazes 19:05 ............Animal Antics 19:35 ...................... G-Force 21:00.................... Sweat the Small Stuff 21:30....... Russell Howard's Good News Topical comedy show in which Russell Howard offers up an energetic look at global goings-on and finds his own uniquely upbeat angle on the news each week, from over 60 international news channels, 140 worldwide newspapers and over a thousand news clips.

Russell and his crack team will leave no stone unturned in their pursuit of the weird and wonderful stories that have been dominating the media over the past seven days and he is joined by a mystery guest who has featured in the news that week.

22:00 ................ Family Guy 22:45 .......... American Dad! 23:30 .................Old School

08:30 ...........Pro Contract - The Football Dream 09:00 .......................The Fantasy Football Club 10:00 .......................Soccer A.M. 12:00 ................. Championship Football 15:15 ...................Football Gold 15:30............................. Ringside 16:30 .......................NBA Action 17:00.............. Football League Semi-Final Play-Off 19:55...... Pro Contract - The Football Dream 20:25 .............Football First

3rd May - 9th May 2013

10:00.............. Storage Hunters 11:30........................ Man v Food Presents 12:00.......................... Red Dwarf 12:35 ......................... Red Dwarf 13:15 ......................... Red Dwarf 13:50.......................... Red Dwarf 14:25 ......................... Red Dwarf 15:00 ......................... Red Dwarf 15:35 ......................... Red Dwarf 16:15 ......................... Red Dwarf 19:30 ................................QI 20:10 .............Dara O'Briain: School of Hard Sums 21:00...................Red Dwarf 22:30 ..................Red Dwarf

08:15 ........................ Emmerdale Omnibus 11:15 .......................Britain's Got More Talent 12:20 ....................The Hot Desk 12:35 .........................King Ralph 14:35................. The Flintstones in Viva Rock Vegas 16:20......You've Been Framed!

18:00 ....................... Twister 20:15 ............... Britain's Got More Talent 21:20 .............Totally You've Been Framed!

22:15 ...........Celebrity Juice 23:05 ..........Totally Bonkers Guinness World Records 23:35.... Britain's Got Talent

W C choice The United States of Television: America in Primetime BBC2, 22:15

Alan Yentob presents the series exploring the social history of America through the prism of primetime television with a look at the evolution of women on TV. A host of stars, creators, writers and producers reflect on the dramatic social changes that transformed the iconic homemaker of the 1950s into the independent woman of today, struggling with a slew of contemporary issues. Mainstream TV was slow to reflect women's economic, sexual and domestic situation in the 60s and 70s, but non-conformists like Lucille Ball stepped into the breach to blaze a trail for other characters who altered the perception of how women were expected to behave: Mary Richards, Murphy Brown, Roseanne, and the women of Sex and the City.

Star Trek Channel 4, 21:00

JJ Abrams' sci-fi adventure prequel, starring Chris Pine and Zachary Quinto, uses the twin devices of a parallel timeline and time travel to boldly move the franchise where it had never gone before. In order to foil a Romulan attack, George Kirk sacrifices himself, having first arranged for an escape pod to take his pregnant wife to safety. Around 20 years later, the young tearaway James T Kirk is encouraged to join the Starfleet Academy

by Captain Pike.

Page 25

TV Guide

www.canarianweekly.com

TV Guide

www.canarianweekly.com

Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday 5th May 06:00 ............................Breakfast

06:00 ................This is BBC Two

06:00 ......... Special Agent Oso

06:10......................... The Hoobs

06:00.....................Children's TV

06:00......................Football First

06:00 ......... The Hour of Power

06:00 ........Nothing to Declare

07:30 ............Match of the Day

06:10 ......Experiment Perilous

06:10 ......... Special Agent Oso

07:05............... Freesports on 4

08:45 ...................... Rupert Bear

07:30..................... Football First

07:00 ....... Don't Stop Me Now

06:30.........Nothing to Declare

09:00 .......................The Andrew Marr Show

07:40 .............The White Tower

06:25 ............................ The Hive

09:15 ........................A to Z of TV Gardening

07:30 .............Everybody Loves Raymond

09:00................ Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom

09:00 ........... Pro Contract - The Football Dream

08:00 ..................Chris and Wes: Let's Do This

07:00 ........Nothing to Declare

06:35............................. The Hive

08:25..................................Frasier

06:55 ........................... Dino Dan

09:30 ........................The Sunday Supplement

08:30.................. Chris and Wes: Let's Do This

08:00.............. Drop Dead Diva

10:00 .............Saturday Kitchen Best Bites

09:15................................... Toby's Travelling Circus 09:30 .... Roary the Racing Car

11:00 .............Goals on Sunday

09:00 ......... Diversity in Dublin

09:45........................ Jelly Jamm

13:00.............................. Football

10:00 ...............World Wrestling Entertainment Superstars

10:00 ..........The Big Questions 11:00 ................Sunday Politics 12:20 ........................Countryfile 13:15 ....................Bargain Hunt 14:15 ..........Helicopter Heroes 14:45.................. Points of View 15:00............................ Escape to the Country 16:00................ Songs of Praise 16:35...... Great Bear Stakeout 17:35.... The Diamond Queen 18:35 .................. BBC News 18:50..... BBC London News 19:00 ................ Countryfile Cambridgeshire. Countryfile is in Cambridgeshire. Ellie Harrison takes a sneak peek behind the scenes at Newmarket, the home of horse racing. She finds out what it takes to maintain the course and meets some of the jockeys of the future. In the north of the county, John Craven is on a literary journey in the village of Helpston. It was the home of one of our greatest countryside poets; John Clare wrote about the landscape around him. John Craven explores his countryside and discovers why Clare never received the critical acclaim of his contemporaries. But John Clare wasn't the only unsung hero to have called this place home; James Wong finds out about a little-known but crucially important Victorian naturalist - Rev Leonard Jenyns - who devoted his life's work to the flora and fauna of Cambridgeshire.

20:00..................... Antiques Roadshow Chepstow Racecourse. Fiona Bruce and the team head for the races as they arrive at Chepstow Racecourse in Wales. Family treasures featured include medals from early Olympic Games, awarded when tug-of-war was a competing sport; a light bulb containing a painstakinglymade model of Lincoln Cathedral gifted by a German prisoner of war in World War 2.

21:00 ................ The Village 22:00 .................. BBC News 22:25 ... Match of the Day 2 23:35 ..............Late Kick Off

Page 26

11:30 ...... Beechgrove Garden 12:00 ........... Gardeners' World Gardening magazine. This episode comes from the Malvern Spring Gardening Show at the Three Counties Showground.

Monty Don, Joe Swift and Carol Klein go behind the scenes to meet the show garden designers and the nursery men and women who make this event so special.

Monty takes a sneak peak at the floral marquee before the show opens and then he searches for the perfect plants to add to his cottage garden, as well as checking out some of the ideas for sustainable gardening at the show.

Carol hunts for rare and unusual plants being showcased at Malvern and discovers what it takes for smaller growers to get their plants to the show in peak condition. Meanwhile Joe will be in the show gardens on the lookout for design tips that could help us all transform our gardens.

12:30 ..............................MotoGP 14:00 ...................................World Championship Snooker 18:00 ..........................Coast The Secret Life of Sea Cliffs.

Nick Crane explores some of the most spectacular and scary sea cliffs in Britain. He embarks on an elevated journey to take in the high spots of the Yorkshire coastline. Tessa Dunlop meets a remarkable woman who witnessed a top-secret American 'invasion' of the English south coast during the Second World War. The US Rangers scaling the cliffs at Burton Bradstock were practising for their D-Day assault on similar terrain in Normandy. On the magnificent sea cliffs that surround Ramsey Island, biologist Sarah Beynon hunts for the superheroes of the insect world who do the island's dirty work, the dung beetles.

19:00 ..........................World Championship Snooker 23:00 ...... Dave Allen: God's Own Comedian

06:40........................... Dino Dan 07:05 ............................Canimals

09:30 ................Sunday Brunch 12:00 .....The Big Bang Theory

07:15 ............................Canimals

12:25..... The Big Bang Theory

07:20 ................................Almost Naked Animals

12:50................... The Simpsons 13:20 .................. The Simpsons

07:30 ............. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

13:50 ........... Channel 4 Racing

08:00........................ Sonny with a Chance

Noel Edmonds asks the all-important question as contestants do battle with the Banker in their quest to leave the Dream Factory with ÂŁ250,000.

08:25 ........................... ITV News 08:30................ Country House Sunday 09:25........................ The Jeremy Kyle Show US 10:20 ...............................Murder, She Wrote 11:20 ........................Dickinson's Real Deal 12:20............................ ITV News and Weather 12:30 ...........Love Your Garden

16:10............... Deal or No Deal

10:00 ............... Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 10:10 ................Power Rangers: Super Samurai

12:00 ................ Modern Family

13:00 .......................Fat Families

10:40 ......................Batman: The Brave and the Bold

12:30 ................ Modern Family

14:00 ..............UK Border Force

13:00 ................ Modern Family

15:00 ..............UK Border Force

14:00........................ The Middle

16:00 ..............UK Border Force

14:30 ........................The Middle

17:00 ...........................Sing Date

17:00................ Modern Family

17:30 ...........................Sing Date

17:30 ...................The Simpsons

18:00...... It's Love, Actually

11:05 ...... Climbing the Giants 11:35 .......The Hotel Inspector

18:10 ........ Channel 4 News

16:00 ...........What a Girl WantsW 15:30 .............................. Football C ch oi ce 18:00 ............Dirty Dancing 18:30 .........Football League 20:05..... Once Upon a Time Semi-Final Play-Off 21:00 ........ The Truth About 21:00........ Scottish Premier Travellers League 21:55 .......5 News Weekend 22:00 ............. Ford Football Special 22:00 ....London Boulevard

21:00 ...........Peter Kay Live: The Tour That Didn't Tour - Tour 22:55 ............The Waterboy

13:30 .........Britain's Got Talent

10:00............................. It's Me or the Dog USA 11:00....................... The Biggest Loser USA

12:35 ..................Thunderpants

19:25....... Gulliver's Travels

09:00............. Ghost Whisperer

11:00 .............WWE Experience

17:10 ..................... Five Minutes to a Fortune 18:30.................. Come Dine with Me

07:30 ........Nothing to Declare

14:20 ...........Along Came Polly

18:00 ............ The Simpsons 18:30 ........... Ashley Banjo's Secret Street Crew 19:30............. The Simpsons 20:00 ............................ Glee 21:00 .............Hawaii Five-0 22:00 ..... NCIS: Los Angeles

23:55 ................ Soho Blues

23:30 ........ Football League

23:00 ................. Cop Squad

06:00 ....... European Tour Golf

07:00 .........................Bush Pilots

06:00.............................. Seinfeld

07:45 ...............................Carpool 08:10 .....Man v Food Presents

07:00 ............. Richard E Grant's Hotel Secrets

08:35 ..............Storage Hunters

08:00 ........................ Iconoclasts

09:00.............. Storage Hunters

09:00 ..............Jennifer Aniston

09:30 ..............Storage Hunters

10:00 ........................... Inside the Actors Studio

18:30 ......It's Love, Actually 19:00 ......It's Love, Actually 19:30 ......It's Love, Actually 20:00 ......It's Love, Actually 20:30 ..................... It's Love, Actually 21:00........... Ripley's Game 23:10 ...................Ladyboys

14:30 ..................................Fletch Action-comedy about a wisecracking Los Angeles reporter working undercover as a homeless beach-bum on a drugdealing story. Fletch smells a rat when a wealthy businessman offers him 50,000 dollars if he can kill the cancer-ridden executive and follow the foolproof escape plan. Unable to resist, the reporter pretends to agree and sets out to unravel the mystery behind the man and his suicidal plan.

16:25 ..........................Midsomer Murders 18:15 ......ITV News London 18:30............. ITV News and Weather 18:45.............. Catchphrase 19:30.................Off Their CW Rockers choice 20:00 ............Endeavour CWce ch oi 22:00 ..............Perspectives

22:55 ............ ITV News and Weather 23:15 ......Rugby Highlights

3rd May - 9th May 2013

19:00 ..................... Great TV Mistakes 19:10............... Snog, Marry, Avoid?

19:40 ............. The Voice UK 21:00 ....... Russell Howard's Good News Extra

13:15 .......................................... QI

21:45 ................... Sweat the Small Stuff 22:30................ Barely Legal Drivers Series in which young drivers take to the road in the family car, unaware that their parents are watching every manoeuvre through state-of-the-art cameras placed in the cars.

Twenty-year-old student and party girl Lauri from Kingstonupon-Thames has a brilliant relationship with her parents, but hasn't driven a car since she wrote her eighteenth birthday present off.

23:30................ Family Guy

13:50 .......................................... QI 14:30 .......................................... QI 15:10 .......................................... QI 10:00 ................Asian Tour Golf

15:50 .......................................... QI

11:55 .............. Football League Play-Off

16:30 .......................................... QI

14:30 ..............................Football 17:00............ WWE Experience 17:55 ..............................Football 20:00 ..................... Football 22:00...Giro D'italia Cycling 23:30 ............ Super League Fulltime

3rd May - 9th May 2013

17:00.......................................... QI 19:00........................... QI XL 20:00............................QI XL 21:00........................... QI XL 22:00 ...........................QI XL 23:00 .............Dara O'Briain: School of Hard Sums 23:50 ...........................QI XL

11:00 ..........................................ER 12:00 ..........................................ER 13:00 ............. Richard E Grant's Hotel Secrets 14:00............................ The Pitch 15:00 .......................Blue Bloods 16:00 .......................Blue Bloods 17:00 .......Star Trek: Enterprise 18:00.. Star Trek: Enterprise 20:00....................... The Pitc 21:00 .......Game of Thrones 22:15..................... Banshee 23:35.................... Mad Men

06:00 ............. Planet's Funniest Animals 06:20......................... Emmerdale Omnibus 09:10 ........... Coronation Street Omnibus 11:40 ..................The Borrowers 13:25 ........................Happy Feet 15:30 .......................You've Been Framed!

16:00 .......................You've Been Framed!

16:35 ............................... Britain's Got Talent 17:40....................... Britain's Got More Talent 18:45 ................... Peter Pan 21:00 ............................. 300 23:20 ...........Celebrity Juice

W C choice Off Their Rockers IVT1, 19:30

Comedy series featuring fearless senior citizens playing pranks on the public with the aid of hidden cameras. Forget everything you thought you knew about growing old gracefully and stand by for some outrageous stunts, irreverent behaviour and lots of laughter. In this episode, a Rocker decides to audition for Britain's Got Talent while another learns what it means to be on Twitter.

Endeavour ITV1, 20:00

Final part of the crime drama series about the young Detective Constable Endeavour Morse. When a hit-and-run accident claims the life of an eminent classics professor, events are set in motion which will lead to the Moonlight Rooms nightclub and a blood reckoning.

The case is complicated by the appearance of Vic Kasper, DI Fred Thursday's old gangland enemy, whose arrival in Oxford carries a direct threat to all Thursday holds dear. While Endeavour is visiting his ailing father in Lincolnshire, Thursday is left to face his nemesis alone. Starring: Shaun Evans, Roger Allam, James Bradshaw, Anton Lesser, Jack Laskey, Sean Rigby.

Page 27

TV Guide

www.canarianweekly.com

TV Guide

www.canarianweekly.com

Monday Monday Monday Monday Monday 6th May 06:15 ........................ The Hoobs

06:00.....................Children's TV

07:10... The Land Before Time

08:35 .... Roary the Racing Car

09:25 ........................ The Jeremy Kyle Show

08:25..................................Frasier

08:45 .......Bananas in Pyjamas

10:00 ...The Secret Millionaire

09:00 ........................ Tickety Toc

10:30 ....................Tipping Point

11:00 ...... Come Dine with Me

09:15.............. The Wright Stuff

11:30..... You've Been Framed!

11:30 .............What's Cooking?

11:10 .............. Trauma Doctors

11:55............................. ITV News and Weather

12:40 ................... Sarah Beeny's Selling Houses

12:10 .........5 News Lunchtime

12:15 ........................................K-9

13:45.......................Four Rooms

14:00 .................Rory Bremner's Great British Views

14:45 ...................... Countdown

13:15 .............Home and Away

06:00 ............................ Breakfast

06:00...........This is BBC Two

06:00 ........................... Daybreak

09:00 ....................... Fake Britain

06:20 ...... Homes Under the Hammer

08:30...............................Lorraine

09:45 ........... Homes Under the Hammer 10:45 ............. Animal Frontline

07:20 .........Don't Get Done, Get Dom

11:15 ...............Don't Get Done, Get Dom

08:05 ....... Animal Frontline

12:00.................... Bargain Hunt

09:20 ...The Prince of Egypt

13:00 ............BBC News at One

10:50 ............ Tintin and the Golden Fleece

13:20.......... BBC London News 13:30 ............................Escape to the Country 14:30 ..........................Perfection 15:15 ............... Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 16:00...................... Planet Earth

Documentary telling the story of one unique month on planet Earth: May. Around the world, May brings new arrivals for five families of wild animals. As the month progresses, each will face their own challenges and each will have to fight for their lives.

In Kenya, baby elephant Maya takes her first few steps. It's a good time for elephants, food isch oi ce abundant and there's something of a baby boom, but Maya and her mum Zadie are in a dangerous position separated from their herd. In the Kalahari Desert, tiny meerkat pup Swift has just a 50/50 chance of surviving the coming winter. Food is scarce, the rains have failed and the cold is beginning to bite. She must rely on a strong, supportive family to help her through. Five families must battle to survive - this could be the hardest month they will ever face.

08:35 ............... Animal Park

12:30 .................Badminton Horse Trials 14:30 ..........................World Championship Snooker 18:00 ...................Eggheads 18:30 ........................Flog It!

18:00 .........BBC News at Six 18:25..... BBC London News 18:30 ........... The One Show 19:10..................... Pointless 20:00 .................EastEnders 20:30.........Pirates of the CW Caribbean: choice The Curse of the Black Pearl 22:40 ........BBC News at Ten 22:55 .....BBC London News 23:00 .......... Have I Got a Bit More News for You 23:45 ............... The Graham Norton Show

W C choice

07:00 ............. Brainiac: Science Abuse

08:00.................. Good Morning Sports Fans

08:00............... Dog the Bounty Hunter

09:00 ............ Golden Moments of European Football

09:00 ................. Futurama: Into the Wild Green Yonder

22:00.... The Bone Collector

23:30 ...........SPL Round-Up

23:00....... Spartacus: Blood and Sand

19:00 ..... Great TV Mistakes

06:00.......... Aerobics: Oz Style

07:10 .............................Top Gear

06:00........................ Iconoclasts

06:00........................ Emmerdale

19:10....................... G-Force

06:30 ........... Thrillseekers: Dirt

08:20 .............................Top Gear

07:00 ..........................................ER

06:25........... Coronation Street

20:30 .........World's Craziest Fools

07:00 ..........WWE Bottom Line

09:50 ..............Storage Hunters

08:00 .......................Blue Bloods

07:25.................... The Hot Desk

21:00 ................. Unsafe Sex in the City

08:00.................. PGA Tour Golf

10:20 ..............Storage Hunters

09:00 .......Star Trek: Enterprise

11:00 ....... European Tour Golf

10:50.............. Storage Hunters

10:00 ..........................................ER

07:35 .......................You've Been Framed!

13:00 .................... Super Rugby

11:20 ..............Storage Hunters

11:00 .......................Blue Bloods

11:50.............. Storage Hunters

12:00 .......Star Trek: Enterprise

12:20 ..............Storage Hunters

13:00 ..................................House

12:45 ..............Storage Hunters

14:00 ..................................House

13:15.............. Storage Hunters

15:00 .......................Blue Bloods

13:45 .............................Top Gear

16:00 .......Star Trek: Enterprise

17:00 ..........................The Chase

16:00................Deal or No Deal

18:00 ...... ITV News London

17:00 ...... Come Dine with Me

18:15 ............. ITV News and Weather

18:00............ The Simpsons

18:30 .........................You've Been Framed!

19:00 ........ Channel 4 News

18:30 .................. Hollyoaks 19:55................4thought.tv 20:00 ........ Superscrimpers: Waste Not, Want Not

12:15 .................... Benidorm ER 13:45 ...................... Neighbours 14:20 ....................The Poseidon Adventure 16:55 ...........Inside Hollywood 17:00 .......................5 News at 5 17:30 ...................... Neighbours 18:00 ........Home and Away 18:30........... 5 News at 6.30

10:00 ......................Soccer A.M. The Best Bits 11:00 ............Soccer Extra Bank Holiday Special 13:00 .............. Football League: Play-off 16:15.............. Football League: Play-off 19:00 ..................... Football 23:00 ................ Netbusters

18:35 .......... Ultimate Police Interceptors

19:00 ..........................World Championship Snooker 23:00.................... The Many Faces of Michael Crawford Looking at the lives of famous people. Documentary tracing the career of one of Britain's most versatile stars. Michael Crawford began his career as a child actor in the 1960s, and his first film, The Knack, was an award-winning cult success that saw him rub shoulders with the Beatles. In the 1970s he landed his best known part as Frank Spencer in Some Mothers Do Ave 'Em. His love of stunts and mastery of Frank's comic mannerisms made him a household name, but he then turned to the stage in what became the biggest musical of all time - The Phantom of the Opera.

In recent years he has stayed on stage, but relentless stunt work and a punishing schedule has taken a toll on his health. Nevertheless, after more than 50 years in the business, he recently returned to the stage in the musical The Wizard of Oz - singing and dancing to a new generation.

20:00 ..........James Nesbitt's Ireland 20:30 ..... Coronation Street 21:00 ....................... Vicious Freddie and Stuart are partners who have lived together in the same small London flat for nearly 50 years. Now in the twilight of their lives they spend their time reading, walking the dog and snapping at each other. Freddie and Stuart go shopping for a new coat for Freddie's Dr Who fan club event. Their new young neighbour Ash needs advice from the pair on how he should go about winning back his ex-girlfriend. Violet is more than happy to help, and along with Penelope, she and Ash head off to the shops - where they make a shocking discovery.

22:00............... Snog, Marry, Avoid?

22:30................. EastEnders 23:00 .................Family Guy 23:20 .................Family Guy

19:30 ...... IRB Sevens World Series Rugby

22:00 ................ ITV News at Ten and Weather 22:15............. The Jonathan Ross Show 23:15 ..........................Monk

23:45........... American Dad!

12:00 .......... NCIS: Los Angeles 13:00 ................... John Bishop's Only Joking 13:30.................. The Simpsons 15:00 ...................Stargate SG-1 17:00 .................. The Simpsons 18:00 .............John Bishop's Only Joking

21:00.....Greggs: More Than Meats the Pie 22:00 .................Revolution

15:50 .............................Top Gear

21:30 ................ The Job Lot

11:00 ................... Hawaii Five-0

20:00......................... Arrow

14:45 .............................Top Gear 13:30 .....................YB40 Cricket

10:50 ...........................Futurama

18:30............ The Simpsons

19:00............... Building the London Underground

21:00...........The Hoarder CW Next Door choice 20:00 ....... Motor Morphers 22:00 ...... Ramsay's Kitchen 21:00 ..........Ben Fogle: New Nightmares USA Lives in the Wild

CW

17:30..Wallace and Gromit: W C A Close Shave choice

07:00 ..................Good Morning Sports Fans

23:05................... Alan Carr: Chatty Man

15:00 ........................ Our Queen

19:30 ..... Coronation Street

06:00 .....................All Star Don't Forget the Lyrics

06:00 ........Nothing to Declare 06:30 ........Nothing to Declare 07:00................................. Maury 08:00 ................................. Maury 09:00 ....................The Real A&E 09:30 ....................The Real A&E 10:00 ................Criminal Minds 11:00 ................Criminal Minds 12:00 ............. CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 13:00............. CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 14:00 ................Criminal Minds 16:00............................ It's Me or the Dog USA 17:00 .................................Airline 17:30 .................................Airline 18:00.... Nothing to Declare 19:00 ................The Biggest Loser USA 20:00 ................The Biggest Loser USA 21:00 ......... Criminal Minds 22:00 ........CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 23:00......................... Bones

15:30 .............. 1001 Things You Should Know

19:00 ................ Emmerdale

06:00...................Good Morning Sports Fans

19:00.......... Have I Got a Bit More News for You 20:00..................... Top Gear

21:30 ...........Championship Rugby Union

22:40 ....... Russell Howard's Good News

23:00.................Footballers' Football Show

23:35 .......... Never Mind the Buzzcocks

17:00 ..........................................ER 18:00......................... House 19:00......................... House 20:00...................... Seinfeld 20:30 ......................Seinfeld 21:00 .......Game of Thrones

08:35................................ Flipper 10:25 ..................The Borrowers 12:15 ........................Emmerdale 12:50 ...........Coronation Street 13:50 ........................ The Jeremy Kyle Show 14:50........................ The Jeremy Kyle Show 15:55 ....................Totally You've Been Framed!

17:00 ........................Happy Feet 19:00...You've Been Framed!

20:00.... Britain's Got Talent

22:15 ..................... Banshee

21:00 ............Hellboy II: The Golden Army

23:25 .... Boardwalk Empire

23:20 ................The Grudge

W C choice

Wallace and Gromit: A Close Shave BBC1, 17:30

Oscar-winning claymation comedy thriller from Nick Park, featuring the popular heroes of The Wrong Trousers and A Grand Day Out. Wallace's whirlwind romance with the proprietor of the local wool shop puts his head in a spin, and Gromit is framed for sheep-rustling in a fiendish criminal plot. Will Wallace snap out of his daze in time to rescue his canine companion?

Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl BBC1, 20:30

Eccentric Captain Sparrow is on a mission to rescue the Governer's beautiful daughter, Elizabeth, and his ship, the Black Pearl, both of which have been captured by curse-ridden pirate, Captain Barbossa. They brave the deadly seas and head towards the mysterious Isla de Muerta in an attempt to stop the skeleton pirates from spilling Elizabeth's blood to lift the curse that keeps them in limbo.

The Hoarder Next Door Channel 4, 21:00

In Lancashire, 54-year-old Ursula is desperate to tackle her compulsive shopping habit. Over the past decade she has built up a collection of impulse buys, worth more than ÂŁ45,000, which are taking over the living room and kitchen. With the family forced to prepare their food on an ironing board despite the numerous kitchen appliances which Ursula has hoarded - the household is at breaking point. Meanwhile in Rugby, 58-year-old bachelor Nigel has let his love of electrical equipment and car parts take over his home. With family and friends unable to visit, Nigel needs to sort out his hoard so that he can once again enjoy company in his house. However, Nigel is only able to move things from one side of the room to the other, and seems unwilling to address the clutter which is causing his isolation. Last in the series.

Page 28

3rd May - 9th May 2013

3rd May - 9th May 2013

Page 29

TV Guide

W C choice Carolin Quentin's National Parks ITV1, 20.00 “It’s over 60 years since our first National Park was created and they remain as stunning and as popular as ever.” Caroline Quentin Actress and presenter Caroline Quentin visits three of Britain’s most popular National Parks in this new three-part documentary series, to celebrate some of the areas of outstanding natural beauty that are right on our doorstep.

Caroline immerses herself in every aspect of park life, from taking part in an unusual race against a steam train through the valleys of Snowdonia, to spending the night counting bats on an island in Loch Lomond and rounding up wild ponies for auction in the New Forest. On her travels Caroline meets the extraordinary people who live and work in the Parks and witnesses some of the incredible wildlife that roams free. In doing so, she appreciates why so many people choose to visit these spectacular National Parks. Caroline Quentin’s National Parks is new and exclusive to ITV. In episode one, Caroline visits Loch Lomond and the Trossachs, nestled in the South-West of Scotland. The park sits on the boundary between the highlands and the lowlands and it’s an area steeped in the very best of Scottish lochs, scenery, wildlife and history. It is the largest national park in Scotland, stretching over 700 square miles.

To appreciate the breath-taking views in style, Caroline enjoys a trip by sea-plane over Loch Lomond and the mountains, captained by ex-British Airways pilot David West. Loch Lomond itself is just one of 22 lochs in the park but it’s by far the largest and the deepest, at 24 miles long and 600 feet deep. The Trossachs in the park’s name refers to the area of glens and hills off to the east and Caroline is stunned by the beautiful landscape: “It’s quite epic actually isn’t it, the scenery. One moment it looks quite domestic and quite small and the next minute it’s really quite grand and it takes your breath away.”

www.canarianweekly.com

Tuesday

Tuesday

www.canarianweekly.com

Tuesday

TV Guide

Tuesday

06:00 ............................Breakfast

06:00................ This is BBC Two

06:00 ........................... Daybreak

06:10 ........................ The Hoobs

06:00.....................Children's TV

09:15 .......................Fake Britain

06:05................... Homes Under the Hammer

08:30...............................Lorraine

07:05............ According to Jim

09:00......................... Tickety Toc

09:25........................ The Jeremy Kyle Show

07:30............. Everybody Loves Raymond

09:15.............. The Wright Stuff

10:30 .................... This Morning

08:25................................. Frasier

07:50 ............. Animal Frontline

11:25 ............................ITV News

12:10 .........5 News Lunchtime

10:00 ...The Secret Millionaire

11:30 .................... This Morning

12:15 ....................Bargain Hunt

08:20.......................... Saints and Scroungers

11:00 ...... Come Dine with Me

12:15.................. Eddie Stobart: Trucks and Trailers

13:00 ............BBC News at One

09:05 ..........................Watchdog

12:30.................. Loose Women

11:30 .............What's Cooking?

13:15 .............Home and Away

13:30 ......... BBC London News

10:05............. Paul Hollywood's Bread

13:30............................. ITV News and Weather

12:40...............Channel 4 News

13:45....................... Neighbours

12:45 ................... Sarah Beeny's Selling Houses

14:15 .................................... NCIS

10:00 ................... Homes Under the Hammer 11:00 .............Animal Frontline 11:30 ...............Don't Get Done, Get Dom

13:45 .............................. Doctors 14:15 ............................Escape to the Country

07:05 ...............Don't Get Done, Get Dom

10:35 ........................... HARDtalk 11:00 .......................... BBC News

15:00.......................... Perfection

12:00 .............The Daily Politics

15:45 ..............The Hairy Bikers' Food Tour of Britain

13:00 ......................Britain's First Photo Album

16:30 ............... Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 17:15 ............................ Pointless 18:00 ........ BBC News at Six 19:00 ...........The One Show 19:30 ................ EastEnders 20:00 ..................Holby City 21:00 ....The Apprentice

CW

ce ambitiousch oi

Container. Sixteen entrepreneurs start their fight for a life-changing investment of 250,000 pounds as the battle to become Lord Sugar's next business partner begins. Summoned to the boardroom at midnight, Lord Sugar warns the candidates that cliches won't cut it, and spells out what he is looking for. Then it is onto the task.

Each team is given a shipping container stuffed with imported products, and the candidates must work through the night to sell the lot. It is boys versus girls, but Lord Sugar has a surprise in store for the sixteen hopefuls as they are put on the spot like never before. Sent straight to the port in the dead of night, the candidates get to see their stock.

From Lucky Cats to two tonnes of water, it is a mixed bag, and they only have until 4pm to shift it all.

The teams search London for businesses that will buy; dawn deals are done at a casino and a coach company, but with the clock ticking it is not long before the blunders begin.

The Victorian photographer Francis Frith spent the best part of his life documenting Britain. His aim was to photograph every city, every town and every village in the land. He and his team took tens of thousands of pictures and left us with an invaluable record of a Britain frozen in time. Now, John Sergeant is attempting to follow in Frith and his team's footsteps, finding out what has changed, what has stayed the same and what has gone forever, and he unravels some of the mysteries of this unique archive.

13:30........................... The Super League Show 14:15 ...................... Mastermind 14:45 .............. My Life in Books 15:15................ Rewind the 60s 16:00............................ Life in the Undergrowth 17:00 ..............The Great British Bake Off Masterclass 18:00 ...................Eggheads 18:30 ........................Flog It! 19:00 ......................Nature's Weirdest Events 20:00 ........Alex Polizzi - The Fixer Returns 21:00 ......... Keeping Britain Alive: The NHS in a Day

22:00 ....... BBC News at Ten

22:00 .........The Apprentice: You're Fired!

22:35 .........The Wright Way

22:30 ................. Newsnight

23:05...... Live at the Apollo

23:20 ......Toughest Place to be a Binman The Return

23:35 ................... What Just Happened

14:00................. Rory Bremner's Great British View 15:00 ........................ Dickinson's Real Deal 16:00.................... Tipping Point 17:00.......................... The Chase 18:00..................... ITV News London 18:30 ............. ITV News and Weather 19:00................. Emmerdale 19:30 .......... River Monsters 20:00..Caroline Quentin's CW National Parks choice In a brand new series, actress and presenter Caroline Quentin visits three of Britain's most popular national parks. The first episode finds her at Loch Lomond and the Trossachs in the South West of Scotland. The park covers over 700 square miles and she takes a trip by sea-plane over the lakes and mountains, including Loch Lomond itself. At Inveraray Castle's annual highland games Caroline enjoys the roast salmon and mussels on offer and even tries her hand at tossing the caber. On the island of Inchcailloch she joins a group of volunteers for a night monitoring the bats that live there.

The park is also home to 61 protected bird species, including ospreys, golden eagles and peregrine falcons, and Caroline helps the park rangers to tag a nest of barn owl chicks. Before leaving she even manages a dip in the icy waters of Loch Lomond and gets on her dancing shoes to take part in a ceilidh.

11:10 .......... Emergency Bikers

13:45 ......................Four Rooms

15:15 .................The Mystery of Natalie Wood

14:45...................... Countdown

17:00 ................ 5 News at 5

15:30 .............. 1001 Things You Should Know

17:30 ............... Neighbours 18:00 ........Home and Away

16:00 ...............Deal or No Deal

18:30........... 5 News at 6.30

17:00 ...... Come Dine with Me

19:00 ..... Inside Hollywood

18:00 ............The Simpsons 18:30 .................. Hollyoaks

19:05 ........ The Truth About Travellers

19:00 ........ Channel 4 News

20:00 ........ Big Body Squad

20:00...Embarrassing Bodies

21:00 ........CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

21:00.......Mary Queen of CW the High Street choice 22:00.............Body of Proof 22:55 .........................Dallas 22:00 ................. Shameless

06:00.................. Good Morning Sports Fans 07:00 ..................Good Morning Sports Fans 08:00 ..................Good Morning Sports Fans 09:00 .....................Ford Monday Night Football 11:30 .............. Football League: Play-off

13:30 ..................SPL Round Up 14:00 .....................Ford Monday Night Football 16:30 .........................Netbusters 17:00 .............. Barclays Premier League Review 18:00 ...... Revista de la Liga 19:00 ..................... Football 23:00 ............ Football Gold 23:15 ............ Football Gold

23:10.....Ben Earl: Trick Artist

23:55 ....................... CSI: NY

23:30 ...... Revista de la Liga

19:00 .................... Don't Tell the Bride

06:00 ...............WWE Afterburn 07:00 .....................Soccer A.M. The Best Bits 08:00................................ Players Championship - Official Film 09:00 ....... European Tour Golf 11:00 .................... Racing News 11:30.............. Sporting Greats 12:00 .................. PGA Tour Golf 13:00 .................................Players Championship - Official Film 14:00 ................. Championship Rugby Union 15:30 .............. Sporting Greats 16:00 ................................Players Championship - Official Film 17:00 ........WWE SmackDown!

19:00............ Golfing World 19:30 ............... Three Steps 21:30 ........ Sporting Greats 22:00 ............ Football Gold 22:30............................. NFL

07:10 ................... Dragons' Den 08:10 ...........................Fifth Gear 08:35 ...........................Fifth Gear 09:00....... Red Bull Cliff Diving 09:30 ....... Red Bull Cliff Diving 10:00 .............................Top Gear 12:40 .............................Top Gear 13:40 ................Seaside Rescue 14:20 .............................Top Gear 17:00 .............................Top Gear 18:00..................... Top Gear 19:00 ................Have I Got a Bit More News for You 20:00 ........Storage Hunters 20:30 ........Storage Hunters 21:00........................... QI XL 22:00.......... Mock the Week 22:40 ................................QI 23:20 .......... Have I Got a Bit More News for You

20:00 ........... Joined for Life Abby and Brittany. Documentary series following conjoined twins Abby and Brittany Hensel, two vivacious, funny and outgoing girls on the brink of their 22nd birthday. As they graduate from college, travel through Europe and find their first teaching job, there is rarely a dull moment. Graduation is fast approaching, so Abby and Brittany take advantage of these last precious weeks to hit the road with their girlfriends, exploring Chicago. As graduation day finally arrives, Abby, Brittany and their friends practise their moves as they prepare to walk across the stage and receive the diplomas they have worked so hard to earn.

21:00............. Who Wants to be a Millionaire?

21:00 . Barely Legal Drivers

22:00................. ITV News at Ten and Weather

22:00 ................... Sweat the Small Stuff

22:35 ...................... The Zoo

22:30 ................ EastEnders

23:35 ............. In Plain Sight

23:00 ................ Family Guy

W C choice

7th

May

06:00 ...... All Star Don't Forget the Lyrics 07:00............. Brainiac: Science Abuse 08:00 ...............Dog the Bounty Hunter 09:00.....................Hawaii Five-0 10:00 ...........NCIS: Los Angeles 11:00 ...........NCIS: Los Angeles 12:00 ...........NCIS: Los Angeles 13:00 ....................Hawaii Five-0 14:00 ....................Hawaii Five-0 15:00 ................... Stargate SG-1 16:00................... Stargate SG-1 17:00 ...................The Simpsons 17:30 ................... John Bishop's Only Joking 18:00 .............John Bishop's Only Joking 18:30 ............ The Simpsons 19:00 ............ The Simpsons 19:30 ............ The Simpsons 20:00.......................... Touch 21:00..............The Day After Tomorrow 23:20 ................. Revolution

06:00........ Nothing to Declare

06:00 ........................ Iconoclasts

06:00 ........................Emmerdale 06:25 ...........Coronation Street 07:25 ........................ The Jeremy Kyle Show US 08:10 .....You've Been Framed!

08:40 ........................Judge Judy 09:05 ... The Only Way is Essex 10:35 .....The Real Housewives of Atlanta 11:35 ................. The Millionaire Matchmaker 12:30 ........................Emmerdale 13:00........... Coronation Street 14:00...The Jeremy Kyle Show 16:10 .....The Real Housewives of Atlanta 17:05 ................. The Millionaire Matchmaker 18:00 .........The Jeremy Kyle Show US 19:00....You've Been Framed!

20:00 ....Peter Andre: My Life 21:00...The Vampire Diaries

07:00.......................................... ER 08:00........................Blue Bloods 09:00 .......Star Trek: Enterprise 10:00.......................................... ER 11:00 .......................Blue Bloods 12:00....... Star Trek: Enterprise 13:00.................................. House 14:00 ..................................House 15:00 .......................Blue Bloods 16:00 .......Star Trek: Enterprise 17:00 ..................................ER

CW

ch oi ce

18:00 .........................House 19:00......................... House 20:00... Friday Night Lights

21:00 ......................... Vegas 22:00 ..................... Banshee 23:10 .............Oliver Stone's Untold History of the United States

06:30 ........Nothing to Declare 07:00.................................. Maury 08:00 ................................. Maury 09:00 ....................The Real A&E 09:30 ....................The Real A&E 10:00 ................Criminal Minds 11:00 ................Criminal Minds 12:00 ............. CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 13:00 ............. CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 14:00 ................Criminal Minds 15:00 ................Criminal Minds 16:00 ............................ It's Me or the Dog USA 17:00 .................................Airline 18:00.... Nothing to Declare 18:30.... Nothing to Declare 19:00 .........................Bones 20:00 ...................Sing Date 20:30 ...................Sing Date 21:00 ................Elementary 22:00 ....................Hannibal 23:00 .............. Chicago Fire

W C choice

Mary Queen of the High Street Channel 4, 21:00

No stranger to controversy, Mary Portas sticks her head above the parapet as she fights for Britain's failing high streets in this new series. With over 100 shops closing a week, is it high noon for the high street?

Mary thinks not, so she took on the challenge of coming up with a 28-point plan, the Portas Review, to help breathe new life into the high street.

She always knew there was no quick fix and it would be far from easy, but she also knew that getting communities involved in Town Teams, and passing some power back to local people, was at the heart of any possible solution. What she didn't expect were the rash of press headlines, bust-ups and the frustrations aplenty.

ER, Sky Atlantic, 17:00

Drama series set in the busy emergency room of a Chicago hospital.

Determined to have a baby, Cate comes up with a plan in which her niece would donate some of her eggs, but she has difficulty in getting Russell's agreement. Dr Carter surprises the staff with a visit to the ER and makes enquiries about working some shifts there. Gates treats Teddy, an eccentric patient who may have ingested a toxin while hunting for mushrooms to make a love potion.

The Apprentice BBC1, 21.00

Award-winning and critically acclaimed series The Apprentice returns on Tuesday 7th May 2013 at 9pm on BBC One for a ninth season, as Lord Sugar and his advisors put 16 new candidates through the toughest business test going.

Viewers will be treated to a double dose of boardroom drama as the second episode airs on Wednesday 8th May, with the series then continuing on Wednesdays at 9pm on BBC One. Sixteen determined candidates will compete to stay out of the firing line for 12 weeks in a bid to win Lord Sugar’s £250,000 investment. They must demonstrate business sense, creativity and leadership in order to impress Lord Sugar, Nick and Karren, but only one applicant will triumph and become Lord Sugar’s next business partner.

This year, the candidates will reveal their business ideas right from the start of the process, not only creating an additional level of competition between the applicants but also challenging them to prove they have the skills to succeed in the business they are pitching to Lord Sugar.

Will those planning a catering business come out top in a food task? Or those pushing a sales– based business succeed in shaking hands on the best deal?

This year’s budding business partners come from a diverse range of careers and backgrounds, from catering, leisure and recruitment to property, medicine and academia.

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3rd May - 9th May 2013

3rd May - 9th May 2013

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Wednesday Wednesday Wednesday Wednesday 8th May 06:00 ............................ Breakfast 09:15 ....................... Fake Britain

Bankers: Fixing The System BBC2, 21.00 In the five years since the crash that brought the world’s economy to its knees, bankers have lurched from one crisis to another. Scandal after scandal has raised questions about their pay, their values and their judgement, and after the industry received billions in tax-payer bail outs, the public is in no mood to forgive and forget.

In this new three-part series for BBC Two, in partnership with The Open University, asks two fundamentally important questions: can we ever trust bankers again and what do we really want from our banks?

In the first episode, Bankers: Fixing the System, bank bosses, regulators and politicians give frank first-hand accounts of how the balance of power has finally started to shift away from the masters of the universe.

Ironically, this game-changing crisis erupted over the widespread rigging of an obscure rate-setting mechanism, Libor, rather than over the tumult of the financial crash. Some say it took this latest scandal to expose a profit-at-all-costs cynicism at the heart of our banking system; all agree things need to change.

Former Barclays chairman Marcus Agius, RBS boss Sir Philip Hampton, Deputy Governor of the Bank of England Andrew Bailey and JeanClaude Trichet examine the difficult new dilemmas about what we want and need from our bankers, and whether we can trust them again.

Matt Allwright investigates the conmen who are trying to get their hands on your money by using fakes, forgeries and frauds and shows you how to avoid being taken for a ride. This episode looks at the fake henna that can scar unsuspecting users forever, how counterfeit top-of-therange chefs' knives are being sold to the public and restaurants, and a black market in fake car servicing software that could turn your car into a death trap.

10:00............. Animal Frontline 10:30 .............State Opening of Parliament 12:15 .................... Bargain Hunt 13:00 ............BBC News at One 13:30 ..........BBC London News 13:45 ...............................Doctors 14:15 ................. Escape to Çthe Country 15:00 ..........................Perfection 15:45 ............................The Hairy Bikers' Food Tour of Britain 16:30 .............................. Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 17:15 .............................Pointless 18:00 .........BBC News at Six 18:30 .....BBC London News 19:00 ........... The One Show 20:00 .................. Watchdog 21:00 ..........The Apprentice

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06:00 ................... Homes Under the Hammer

06:00 ........................... Daybreak

07:00 ...............Don't Get Done, Get Dom

09:25 ........................ The Jeremy Kyle Show

07:45 ............. Animal Frontline

10:30 .................... This Morning

08:15.......................... Saints and Scroungers

11:25 ............................ITV News

09:00 ..............The Great British Sewing Bee

12:30.................. Loose Women

10:00 .................... Deadly 60 on a Mission

08:30 ..............................Lorraine

11:30..................... This Morning 13:30............................. ITV News and Weather

South America. Steve Backshall and the crew scour the wetlands of Venezuela in search of more lethal beasts. Steve heads into crocodile infested waters for a spooky nocturnal encounter with a truly shocking predator, the electric eel.

He joins a team trying to save a highly endangered predator, the Orinoco crocodile, and witnesses the ferocious maternal instincts of a female croc protecting her nest.

Steve then leaves the wetlands for the rainforest and heads into a dark cave infested with vampire bats. Here a true toxic terror lurks, the scolopendra, a giant centipede armed with a powerful venomous bite. Before leaving South America, Steve takes the opportunity to cross the border into Brazil and gets a close-up view of one of the world's rarest canines, the maned wolf.

14:00 .....Rory Bremner's Great British Views

10:30..............................See Hear 11:00............................ Tiger Bay

18:30 ............. ITV News and Weather

12:45 .......................Animal Park

19:00 ................ Emmerdale

13:30 ............The Weakest Link

19:30 ..... Coronation Street

14:15...................... Mastermind

20:00.... All Star Mr and Mrs

14:45.............. My Life in Books 15:15................ Rewind the 60s

The candidates face an early morning trip to the pub, as this task sees them coming up with a new flavoured beer; two candidates who want Lord Sugar to invest in the drinks business go head-to-head to prove themselves. Half the teams head off to a brewery to dream up their drinks, while the rest brainstorm brands for their beers. One team opts for a rhubarb beer, while the others choose chocolate and orange - but there is trouble brewing when the manufacturing process goes into meltdown and potential profit is poured down the drain.

16:00 ........................... Life in the Undergrowth

22:00 ........BBC News at Ten 22:25 .....BBC London News

22:00 .........The Apprentice: You're Fired!

22:35... A Question of Sport

22:30 ................. Newsnight

23:05 .................Surrogates

23:20 ..........A Culture Show Special

17:00 ........................... The Great British Bake Off Masterclass 18:00 ...................Eggheads 18:30........................ Flog It! 19:00 ...... Nature's Weirdest Events 20:00......................Coast

CW

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21:00......Bankers: Fixing CW the System choice

15:00........................ Dickinson's Real Deal 16:00.................... Tipping Point 17:00 ..........................The Chase

18:00 ...... ITV News London

Phillip Schofield presents a new series of the classic game show as three celebrity couples battle it out to win £30,000 for their chosen charity. Who knows the most about their other half? All the couples need to do is match each other's answers - but it's not as easy as it seems. The couple with the most matches at the end of the first two rounds goes through to play in the final. Can they match their answers again in the tricky final round and win the jackpot? The couples hoping to win big this time are TV presenter Gabby Logan and husband Kenny Logan, singer Toyah Willcox and husband, guitarist Robert Fripp, and EastEnders actor Jake Wood and wife Alison Wood.

21:00 ........ Scott and Bailey 22:00................ ITV News at Ten and Weather 22:40.........Fast and Furious

3rd May - 9th May 2013

06:10......................... The Hoobs 07:00 ............ According to Jim 07:30 .............Everybody Loves Raymond 08:25................................. Frasier 10:00 ... The Secret Millionaire Changed My Life 11:00 ...... Come Dine with Me 11:30 .............What's Cooking?

12:25 ..............Channel 4 News 12:30................... Sarah Beeny's Selling Houses 13:30 ........... Channel 4 Racing 15:30 .............. 1001 Things You Should Know 16:00 ...............Deal or No Deal 17:00 ...... Come Dine with Me 18:00............ The Simpsons 18:30................... Hollyoaks 19:00 ........ Channel 4 News 20:00.............. Phil Spencer: Secret Agent 21:00... 24 Hours in A and E 22:00 ..........10 O'Clock Live 22:55 .............Random Acts 23:00 .............Secrets of the Shoplifters

06:00.....................Children's TV

19:00 ..............................The Apprentice

06:00 ..................Good Morning Sports Fans 07:00 ..................Good Morning Sports Fans 08:00.................. Good Morning Sports Fans 09:00.............................. Football 10:30 .................................Revista de la Liga 11:30..................... Football Asia 12:00 ......... Football's Greatest 12:30 .............................. Football 14:00..................... Football Asia 14:30 .................................Revista de la Liga 15:30 .............................. Football 17:00 ............................Inside the PGA Tour 17:30.................. European Tour Weekly 18:00 ................Boots 'n' All 19:00 ..................... Football 22:00 ............ Football Gold 22:15 ............ Football Gold 22:30 ........Sporting Heroes 23:30 ............................. NFL

06:00 ......................Don't Forget the Lyrics

06:00 ........Nothing to Declare

07:00 ............. Brainiac: Science Abuse

07:00 ................................. Maury

08:00 ...............Dog the Bounty Hunter

09:00.................... The Real A&E

06:00 ....................WWE Vintage Collection

20:00 ................Traffic Cops

07:00 ............Sports Unlimited

21:00 .................Old School

09:00 ........................ Tickety Toc 09:15.............. The Wright Stuff 11:10 ................Ben Fogle: New Lives in the Wild 12:10 .........5 News Lunchtime 12:15................Frontline Police 13:15............. Home and Away 13:45 ...................... Neighbours 14:15.................................... NCIS 15:15...................... The Mystery of Natalie Wood 17:00 .......................5 News at 5 17:30............... Neighbours 18:00 ........Home and Away 18:30 ...........5 News at 6.30 19:00......... Frontline Police 20:00..... Emergency Bikers 21:00 ........................... NCIS 21:55 ..........Law and Order: Special Victims Unit 22:55 ........CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

09:00 ...........NCIS: Los Angeles 10:00 ...........NCIS: Los Angeles 11:00........... NCIS: Los Angeles 12:00 ...........NCIS: Los Angeles 13:00 ....................Hawaii Five-0

06:30.........Nothing to Declare 08:00 ................................. Maury 09:30 ....................The Real A&E 10:00 ................Criminal Minds 11:00 ................Criminal Minds 12:00 ............. CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

14:00.................... Hawaii Five-0

13:00............. CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

15:00 ................... Stargate SG-1

14:00 ................Criminal Minds

17:00................... The Simpsons

15:00 ................Criminal Minds

17:30.................... John Bishop's Only Joking

16:00 ............................ It's Me or the Dog USA

18:00 .............John Bishop's Only Joking

17:00 .................................Airline

18:30 ............ The Simpsons

18:30.... Nothing to Declare

19:00 ............ The Simpsons

19:00........ CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

20:00............ Ashley Banjo's Secret Street Crew

18:00.... Nothing to Declare

20:00............... Chicago Fire

21:00 ............................ Glee

21:00..........................Bones

22:00 ......................... Touch

22:00......... Grey's Anatomy

23:00 ................. Cop Squad

23:00.......It's Love, Actually

07:10 ................... Dragons' Den

06:00........................ Iconoclasts

08:10 ..............Storage Hunters

07:00.......................................... ER

09:00 ....... Red Bull Cliff Diving

08:00........................Blue Bloods

10:00 .............................Top Gear

09:00 .......Star Trek: Enterprise

22:30 ................... Sweat the Small Stuff

08:00 .................................Players Championship - Official Film

12:00 ..............Storage Hunters

10:00 ..........................................ER

23:00 ................ Family Guy

09:00............................... Netball

13:00 .............................Top Gear

11:00 .......................Blue Bloods

15:00 ....... Red Bull Cliff Diving 16:00 ..............Storage Hunters

12:00 .............................Star Trek: Enterprise

11:30 .............. Sporting Greats

17:00 .............................Top Gear

13:00 ..................................House

12:00 ......................Bass Fishing

18:00..............................Top Gear

14:00 ..................................House

13:00 .................................Players Championship - Official Film

19:00 ...........................QI XL

15:00 .......................Blue Bloods

20:00 .............Dara O'Briain: School of Hard Sums

16:00 .............................Star Trek: Enterprise

20:50 .......... Have I Got a Bit More News for You

18:00 .........................House

06:00........................ Emmerdale 06:25 ........... Britain's Got More Talent 07:25 ........................ The Jeremy Kyle Show US 08:10 .....You've Been Framed!

08:40 ........................Judge Judy 09:00 ... The Only Way is Essex 10:35......The Real Housewives of Atlanta 11:35.................. The Millionaire Matchmaker 12:30 ........................Emmerdale 13:00 .......................Britain's Got More Talent 14:00...The Jeremy Kyle Show 16:10......The Real Housewives of Atlanta 17:05.................. The Millionaire Matchmaker 18:00..........The Jeremy Kyle Show US 19:00....You've Been Framed!

20:00...........Totally Bonkers Guinness World Records

Animated comedy about family life. Brian's gay cousin Jasper visits the Griffin house and announces that he is engaged to his partner and wants to be married at their house. When Mayor West bans gay marriage in an effort to bring attention away from a scandal of his own, Brian resorts to hostile actions to try to change the Mayor's mind. Lois and Peter question their view towards gay marriage while Chris joins the "Young Republicans" Club to impress a girl.

23:50 ..................The Aussie Millions Poker Championship

11:00 .................... Racing News

14:00 ........Brighton Marathon 15:00 ...............WWE Afterburn 16:00 .....................YB40 Cricket 22:00................ Boots 'n' All

23:25 ................ Family Guy

23:00 ............... Total Rugby

23:45 ....................American Dad!

23:30 ................ FIFA Futbol Mundial

3rd May - 9th May 2013

21:50 .........The Rob Brydon Show 22:30 ...........................QI XL 23:25 ....... Russell Howard's Good News Extra

17:00 ..........................................ER 19:00 .........................House 20:00 .................... The Pitch 21:00 ............... Blue Bloods 22:00 ....................Mad Men 23:00 .......Game of Thrones

W C choice Coast BBC2, 20:00

All at Sea. The Coast team are all at sea, as they head offshore to explore surprising stories of love and death, cannibalism and communist submarines, seasickness and a seafaring prince. Nick Crane attempts one of the world's most fearsome yachting challenges, the Isle of Wight 'Round the Island Race'. Mark Horton relives a gruesome tale of cannibalism and murder that scandalised Victorian Britain and still affects the law today.

In Milford Haven, Ruth Goodman celebrates the Dutch fishermen who, when Hitler invaded the Netherlands in 1940, escaped in their boats, crossing the North Sea to help defend Britain.

Naval historian Nick Hewitt searches out the remarkable remains of the submarines that threatened to sink Britain by strangling its sea trade. And one hardy bunch of seaanglers, who all hail from Zimbabwe, find that a life on the ocean wave isn't all it's cracked up to be when they chance their hand with rod and line in the rolling seas off the coast of Yorkshire.

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Thursday Thursday Thursday Thursday 9th May 06:00 ............................ Breakfast 09:15 ....................... Fake Britain 10:00 ........... Homes Under the Hammer 11:00 ............. Animal Frontline

For the Love of Dogs ITV1, 20.30 Paul O’Grady is back where he belongs, at Battersea Cats and Dogs Home, meeting the latest residents to trot through the front door. From assisting vets during surgical procedures, to hand-rearing puppies and helping to train a naughty beagle, Paul is determined to get his hands dirty like never before.

Paul meets the dogs who come into the home needing treatment, training and ultimately new homes. Every dog has its own story and each dog needs a new place they can call home.

There is nowhere quite like Battersea, which is tear jerking and uplifting in equal measure. And although Paul immerses himself in the positive work the charity do, he is also forced to confront the heart-breaking reality of stray dogs deserted on the streets and those left starving and mistreated.

In episode one, Paul falls in love with two-year-old Frankie, a British Bulldog with a huge personality and a very expressive face, who has problem with his legs. Battersea vet Phil can’t work out what the problem is but suspects it might be neurological. Phil says: “We’ve got some good friends at the vet college so we’re going to refer him up there for tests that we can’t do here in the home and get a better idea of what’s wrong with him.”

Next up is King, an English Mastiff, the largest dog breed in the world.

He weighs in at 75 pounds and Battersea don’t even have a water bowl big enough for him. He looks intimidating but turns out to be gentle giant who loves to slobber and sleep.

King snores and has sores on his joints from sleeping on hard floors but there’s one big problem that must be resolved before he can be rehomed - he stinks! Poor King has a skin condition, which is similar to eczema in humans.

Paul meets him for the first time: “Hello fella, God he’s massive. What’s his surname, Kong? I’ve just got a bit of a whiff off him. It’s making my eyes water.”

King’s pong can be reduced with a regular medicated wash and Paul is given the unenviable task of helping to bathe him and improve his aroma, in a bid to get him a home. It’s not going to be easy.

Pet Insurance. Dominic Littlewood comes to the aid of ordinary people who are having a consumer nightmare. Dom uncovers an insurance issue that could affect thousands of pet owners. When Carolyn switched pet insurance companies, she did not realise there would be a two-week exclusion period when she was not covered. So when beloved pet dog Archie needed thousands of pounds of emergency treatment during this exclusion period, Carolyn found she was not covered. Dom takes on her case and challenges the insurance industry to find out why such exclusion periods exist.

Plus, Rani Price hits the streets to test people on whether it is better to pay by debit or credit card, and hears how one lady took a property dispute all the way to Downing Street

11:30............... Don't Get Done, Get Dom 12:15 .................... Bargain Hunt 13:00 ............BBC News at One 13:30 ..........BBC London News 13:45 ...............................Doctors 14:15 ............................Escape to the Country 15:00 ..........................Perfection 15:45 ..............The Hairy Bikers' Food Tour of Britain 16:30................ Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 17:15 .............................Pointless 18:00..........BBC News at Six 18:30 .....BBC London News 19:00 ........... The One Show If it's got Britain talking then it will get talked about on The One Show. Matt Baker and Alex Jones present the stories that matter from across the country.

19:30 .................EastEnders 20:00 .......... Waterloo Road 21:00 ........ Britain's Biggest Hoarders 22:00........ BBC News at Ten 22:25......BBC London News 22:35 ........... Question Time 23:35 ...................This Week

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06:25....................... Animal Park 07:10 ................................... Coast 07:50 ............. Animal Frontline 08:20 .......................... Saints and Scroungers

06:00........................... Daybreak

06:10 ........................ The Hoobs

06:00.....................Children's TV

08:30 ..............................Lorraine

07:05 ............ According to Jim

09:25 ........................ The Jeremy Kyle Show

07:30............. Everybody Loves Raymond

08:35............................ Roary the Racing Car

10:30 .................... This Morning

08:25 .................................Frasier

09:00 ........................ Tickety Toc

09:05................ Italy Unpacked

11:25............................ ITV News

09:15 ..............The Wright Stuff

11:30 .................... This Morning

10:00.......................... The Secret Millionaire

12:30.................. Loose Women

11:00 ...... Come Dine with Me

13:30............................. ITV News and Weather

11:30 .............What's Cooking?

12:10 .........5 News Lunchtime

14:00 .................Rory Bremner's Great British Views

12:30 ................... Sarah Beeny's Selling Houses

15:00 ........................ Dickinson's Real Deal

13:30 ........... Channel 4 Racing

Andrew Graham-Dixon and chef Giorgio Locatelli travel through Italy exploring the country's history, culture, food, art and landscape.

Their journey begins in Bologna, the capital of Emilia-Romagna, one of the richest regions in Italy.

They find out why the city is know as la Dotta (the Learned), la Grassa (the Fat) and la Rossa (the Red), while visiting its shops, art institutions and the oldest university in the world. Andrew and Giorgio experience the social and friendly atmosphere of the region and meet fishermen casting huge nets at the mouth of the river Po. From there, it is a short journey to Ferrara where they discover the legacy left by the famous dynasty d'Este, and to Modena, home of balsamic vinegar and Ferrari. Finally, Giorgio reveals the source of modern Italian cuisine - at the Palatina Library in Parma he views an original copy of the first cook book of the newly united Italy - while Andrew admires Correggio's magnificent fresco in the dome of Parma Cathedral.

10:05 ...................... Great British Railway Journeys 10:35 ........................... HARDtalk 11:00 .......................... BBC News 12:00 .............The Daily Politics 13:00...................... Britain's First Photo Album 13:30 ............The Weakest Link 14:15 ...................... Mastermind 14:45 .............. My Life in Books 15:15 ................Rewind the 60s 16:00 ........................... Life in the Undergrowth 17:00 ..............The Great British Bake Off 18:00 ...................Eggheads 18:30........................ Flog It! 19:00..Nature's Weirdest CoiWce Events ch 20:00 ...........City of Dreams 21:00........... The Politician's Husband 22:00..... Watson and Oliver 22:30.................. Newsnight 23:20 ......... Keeping Britain Alive: The NHS in a Day

12:25 ..............Channel 4 News

16:00 ....................Tipping Point

15:30 .............. 1001 Things You Should Know

17:00 ..........................The Chase

16:00............... Deal or No Deal

18:00...... ITV News London

17:00...... Come Dine with Me

18:30 ............. ITV News and Weather

18:00.............The Simpsons

19:00 ................ Emmerdale

19:00 ........ Channel 4 News

19:30 ...................... Tonight 20:00................ Emmerdale

18:30 .................. Hollyoaks 19:55 ...............4thought.tv 20:00 ............. Secret Eaters 21:00 ........... The Repo Man 22:00.......Sex on Wheels

20:30...Paul O'Grady: For W C The Love of Dogs choice Dog lover Paul O'Grady returns with a brand new series of the award-winning show in which he visits the staff and canine residents of Battersea Dogs and Cats Home. The entertainer is in his element as he follows the progress of some of the dogs from their arrival through to their adoption by a new family. In the first episode of the series, Paul meets and falls in love with Frankie, a British bulldog whose wobbly back legs could be a sign of bigger problems.

21:00 ............Murder on the Home Front 22:00................ ITV News at Ten and Weather 22:35 ....................... Vicious 23:05 ................ The Job Lot 23:35 ...........All You Can Eat

3rd May - 9th May 2013

CW

08:45 .......Bananas in Pyjamas

11:10 .............. Big Body Squad 12:15 .......The Hotel Inspector 13:15 .............Home and Away 13:45 ...................... Neighbours 14:15 .................................... NCIS 15:15 ...............Chinese Food in Minutes 15:20 .......McBride: Fallen Idol 17:00 .......................5 News at 5 17:30 ...................... Neighbours 18:00 ........Home and Away 18:30 ...........5 News at 6.30 19:00 .........Britain's Closest Encounters 20:00........... The True Story 21:00 ..........The Ninth Gate

06:00.................. Good Morning Sports Fans

06:00 ........Nothing to Declare

23:30 .....................Ringside

06:00 ......................Don't Forget the Lyrics 07:00 ........................... Futurama 07:10 ............. Brainiac: Science Abuse 08:00 ...............Dog the Bounty Hunter 08:30 ...............Dog the Bounty Hunter 09:00 ...........NCIS: Los Angeles 10:00........... NCIS: Los Angeles 11:00 ...........NCIS: Los Angeles 13:00 ....................Hawaii Five-0 14:00 ....................Hawaii Five-0 15:00 ................... Stargate SG-1 17:00 ...................The Simpsons 17:30 ................... John Bishop's Only Joking 18:00 .............John Bishop's Only Joking 18:30............ The Simpsons 20:00 ....Greggs: More Than Meats the Pie 21:00 ......................... Arrow 22:00 .............Hawaii Five-0 23:00 ..... NCIS: Los Angeles

06:00 ...........................Emmerdale 06:25 ..............Coronation Street 06:55 .................Planet's Funniest Animals 07:25 ............................The Jeremy Kyle Show US 08:10 ....... You've Been Framed!

08:40........................... Judge Judy 09:05 ......The Only Way is Essex 10:40 ........The Real Housewives of Atlanta 11:35 .....................The Millionaire Matchmaker 12:30 ...........................Emmerdale 13:00 ..............Coronation Street 13:30 ........................... Judge Judy 14:00 .... The Jeremy Kyle Show 16:10 ........The Real Housewives of Atlanta 17:05 .....................The Millionaire Matchmaker 18:00.................... The Jeremy Kyle Show US 19:00....You've Been Framed!

07:00 ..................Good Morning Sports Fans 08:00 ..................Good Morning Sports Fans 09:00............................... Football 10:30 ................................ La Liga 12:00 .........................FIFA Futbol Mundial 12:30.............................. Football 14:00 ................................ La Liga 15:30.............................. Football 17:00 .............. Barclays Premier League World 17:30.................... Super League Superstars 18:00 .....................Ringside 19:00........ Barclays Premier League World 19:30 ...................... Football League: Play-off 22:00......... The Footballer's Football Show

23:05... 24 Hours in A and E

23:45 ........True Crimes: The First 72 Hours

19:00 ......... The Apprentice

06:00.......... Aerobics: Oz Style

07:10 ................... Dragons' Den

06:00........................ Iconoclasts

20:00 ............... Barely Legal Drivers

06:30............ Thrillseekers: Dirt

08:10 ...........................Fifth Gear

07:00 .........................................ER

07:00 ............ WWE Experience

09:00 ....... Red Bull Cliff Diving

08:00 ...................... Blue Bloods

08:00 ....Champions Tour Golf

10:00................... Dragons' Den

09:00 ...... Star Trek: Enterprise

09:00 .................................Players Championship Official Film

11:00 .............................Top Gear

10:00 .........................................ER

12:00 ...........................Fifth Gear

11:00...................... Blue Bloods

13:00 .............................Top Gear

12:00...... Star Trek: Enterprise

15:00....... Red Bull Cliff Diving

13:00 ................................. House

10:30 .........................FIBA World Basketball

15:30....... Red Bull Cliff Diving

14:00.................................. House

16:00 ...........................Fifth Gear

15:00 ...................... Blue Bloods

11:00 ............. Sporting Heroes

17:00 .............................Top Gear

12:00 .......................Boots 'n' All

19:00 .......... Have I Got a Bit More News for You

16:00 .............................Star Trek: Enterprise

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Series in which young drivers take to the road in the family car, unaware that their parents are watching every manoeuvre through state-of-the-art cameras placed in the cars. Matthew is a gay drama student from Wales.

Having suffered homophobic abuse on public transport, he grabs his opportunity to drive his mum's car with both hands - unfortunately they are not always on the wheel. With loads of diva-like screaming, running red lights and an argument with a concrete pillar, Matthew's mum is less than impressed. 18-yearold party girl Georgina from Cambridgeshire thinks nothing of going on holiday with seven boys - minus her boyfriend.

10:00 ........................... European Tour Weekly

13:00 .. Players Championship - Official Film

18:00......................... House

14:00 .......................Boots 'n' All

21:00 ........................... Suits

19:00 ........................ House 20:00 ....... Richard E Grant's Hotel Secrets

15:00 ............. Sporting Heroes

21:00............ Joined for Life

22:00 ..........Mock the Week

16:00 ....Champions Tour Golf

22:00....... Russell Howard's Good News

17:00 ...................................... NFL

22:40 .............Dara O'Briain: School of Hard Sums

18:00 ....................... Players Championship Golf

23:30 .......... Never Mind the Buzzcocks

22:30 ................ EastEnders

17:00 .........................................ER

20:00 .................... Top Gear

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21:00 ............... Blue Bloods 22:00 ......................... Vegas 23:00 .....................Banshee

06:30 ........Nothing to Declare 07:00 ................................. Maury 08:00 ................................. Maury 09:00.................... The Real A&E 09:30.................... The Real A&E 10:00 ................Criminal Minds 11:00 ................Criminal Minds 12:00............. CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 13:00 ............. CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 14:00 ................Criminal Minds 16:00 ............................ It's Me or the Dog USA 17:00 .................................Airline 17:30................................. Airline 18:00.... Nothing to Declare 18:30.... Nothing to Declare 19:00 ........CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 20:00 ......It's Love, Actually 21:00 ...................Ladyboys 22:00 ................. CSI: Miami 23:00 ....................Hannibal

W C choice

Sex on wheels Channel 4, 22.00

Sex is everywhere.

But what if something stood in the way of your experiencing a fulfilling sex life? This sensitive and honest documentary takes a candid look at the sex lives of four disabled individuals. From the recently paralysed Karl who is coming to terms with life without an erection, to cerebral palsy sufferer Pete whose hoist helps him into every conceivable sexual position and has ambitions to be the UK’s first disabled porn star. Leah, a 24-year-old woman with brittle bone disease won’t let her body’s limitations get in the way of an adventurous sex life.

Twenty- six-year- old John has learning difficulties and his mother has taken the momentous decision to hire him an escort to help him lose his virginity.

Nature's Weirdest Events BBC2, 19:00

Documentary series exploring bizarre and extraordinary natural events on the planet. Using eyewitness footage, first hand accounts and scientific explanations, presenter Chris Packham unpacks the strange fiction facts behind what really happened.

Chris looks at some of the most extraordinary behaviours and extreme adaptations that animals have developed to survive.

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Feature

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Feature

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3rd May - 9th May 2013

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Home and Lifestyle

By Sue McDonald BUYING furniture should be a carefully-considered decision, since it is an expensive article and you will have to live with your choices for a long time.

In the case of the photo, obviously not enough preparation had gone into this particular purchase!

Among our best sellers are sofa beds, which can be made to size and in a material of your choice at no extra cost.

Fashions come and go, and those of us who are “mature” will remember some of our fashion disasters, particularly from the 70s! But we thought we looked great at the time.

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Made to Brits bitten measure! by recession

However, whatever outfit you buy isn’t the end of the world, because you don’t wear it every day, and you can always consign it to the back of the wardrobe.

I’m sure I have a pair of jeans in my wardrobe somewhere that are older than my teenage children!

It’s the same with haircuts. Styles come and go, but even if you do have a disaster, it will grow out eventually.

But furniture is a rather more permanent investment, and worthy of some thought and preparation.

We often go to clients’ houses to check the layout of their room and measure up to make sure the sofa will fit, as well as check that the colour will tone well with other items, such as the floor tiles or curtains.

Sometimes, we can see a different way to

lay out the room to better effect. That’s because when you are familiar with a space, you often can’t imagine it organised any other way.

This week, we went to look at a potential show flat in Puerto Santiago.

The lounge was very large, but quite long and narrow.

But by changing the sofa from one side of the room to the other, it was possible to use more of the space as the lounge part, and less as the dining area.

It was more efficient use of the space, and more pleasant in appearance.

This advice is free of charge, and all part of the interior-design service.

So give some serious thought to your furniture purchases and, if in doubt, make sure you get some advice - or at least a second opinion!

We’re counting our pennies and buying fewer treats these days

MINTEL’S annual report on British Lifestyles highlights the legacy of the economic downturn in Britain, and finds that “savvy” ways are here to stay

With the lifestyles of many consumers in Britain in a state of flux over the past five years, the report reveals the legacy of the economic downturn.

When asked about how their spending habits have changed over the past five years, 56% of all Brits - 23 million adults claim to buy items only when absolutely needed.

And 37% say they are buying fewer treats for themselves and their families.

While 22% of consumers agree they have been better off over the past year, 36% say things have become more difficult.

The same number of Brits claim to go on fewer holidays, and 17% are working longer hours because of the downturn.

In addition, while 60% were perfectly happy with their standard of living in 2008, this figure fell to 50% in 2012.

Today, the top three financial priorities for British consumers are: 1. Keeping up with bills (82%). 2. Adding to rainy-day savings (67%). 3. Saving for big ticket purchases (58%).

Just 6% of adults admit they haven’t changed their spending habits in response to the economic downturn.

Ina Mitskavets, Mintel’s Senior Consumer

and Lifestyles Analyst said: “ British consumers are adjusting to the new economic reality, with financial prudence and savvy shopping already the default for many.

“They are working harder and saving more money for the future, as a direct consequence of the recession.

“The reduced desire to fritter away hardearned income on ‘niceto-haves’ will shape retail offerings.

“It will also have farreaching implications for consumer expectations about quality, price, product variety and customer service.”

Mintel’s research also examines the value of every consumer market covered by its market research, and the impact of consumer-spend on market sectors to 2017.

Consumer spend, valued at £999 billion overall last year, is set to grow a further 17% between 2012 and 2017 to reach £1.17 trillion.

Key consumer sectors which stand to benefit in the next five years include: non-alcoholic drinks (set to increase 25%), in-home food (+20%) and beauty and personal care (+18%).

The slowest areas of growth will be technology and communications

(+5%), home and garden (+7%), food service (+7%), holidays (+9%) and leisure and entertainment (+11%).

The coffee and energy drinks markets, highlighting consumer demand for functionality in non-alcoholic drinks - and especially energyboosting in difficult economic circumstances - broke the billion mark in 2012.

The energy drinks market grew 78% between 2007-2012 to reach £1 billion in 2012, and the coffee market improved 34% over the same period to reach £1 billion last year.

Consumers totalling 62% claim their purchasing habits of nonalcoholic drinks have not changed in 2013, in comparison with 2012.

Home-baking and crisps are star performers, while bread fails to get a slice of the action.

Valued at £76 billion, the majority of consumers (52%) are spending “about the same” on in-home food at the beginning of 2013 as they were at the start of 2012.

The economic downturn kick-started a renaissance in the home-baking market, with some 34% of Brits cooking or baking more from scratch, and value sales rocketing by 84% over the past five years to reach £410 million in 2012.

Expenditure on crisps, nuts and snacks increased by 29% to £3.3 billion from 2007-12.

But expenditure on bread and baked goods has been unconvincing, growing just 1.5% to £3.6 billion over 2011-12.

3rd May - 9th May 2013

Garden

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By David Hudgell THOSE of you who enjoy growing fruit trees will almost certainly hanker after a lemon plant at some time.

They brighten up gardens - or patios and fill the air with a delicious scent whenever the plant is in flower, But lemons are a challenge, even with our climate here, and, like all citrus fruit, they need consistent care to be successful.

Lemons, and citrus generally, are not frosthardy, which won’t apply to Tenerife, of course, unless you’re living up in the hills.

They are self-fertile, though, which means you get fruit even if you have just the one plant.

Lemon trees range in size at maturity from 60cm (2ft) tall to 2.5m (8ft) or more. They have mid-green, long-oval, evergreen leaves, and the wine-coloured buds open into white, fivepetal, fragrant, star-like flowers.

The fruit take about nine months to swell and ripen, so there are often flowers and lemons on the plant at the same time, which is a most appealing sight.

They flower most prolifically in spring in England, but as long as

Sweet success of growing lemons!

We’re waging war on gnomes!

the night temperature stays above 11C (52F), so that the plant does not become dormant, many will bloom in autumn and winter, too.

If you do take the plunge, it is best to buy a grafted plant of a named cultivar from a reputable source.

Yes, it is exciting to grow plants from pips, but they take some years to flower and may never bear decent fruit.

Stephen Read, of Reads Nursery, which holds the National Collection of Citrus, recommends a variety: the compact and easy La Valette, the fussier but equally-

3rd May - 9th May 2013

prolific Meyers Lemon if space is limited, and the much bigger Quatre Saisons, which you may find listed in catalogues as Garey’s Eureka, for heavier crops of lemons, which are as acid as commercial varieties.

He also plumps for Imperial, which crops well once a year on a vigorous bush, and the remarkable Ponderosa, which produces lemons the size of grapefruits!

Read finds that lemons grow best in John Innes No 2 compost, with 25% extra horticultural grit or perlite by volume to promote sharp drainage, which is vital.

And they can be grown in terracotta or plastic pots.

Do avoid over-potting established trees because they need moving only every two to three years into a pot one size up. Otherwise, simply take off the top 2.5cm (1in) of soil each spring and add fresh compost.

These plants should be well soaked when watered and then left alone until almost dry again. Never let them dry out completely, however, or they will drop leaves and flowers.

Mist the foliage regularly with water to raise the humidity (they

like about 50%), or put the pot on a tray of wet pebbles.

Lemons are greedy feeders so, ideally, they should be given a highnitrogen feed frequently from March, when the clocks go forward, until October, when they go back, followed by a more balanced feed in autumn and winter.

Also, lemons are happiest if put outdoors in late May, since it is hard to achieve sufficient ventilation under glass in summer.

Again, that obviously does not apply to conditions over here, whatever the time of year.

But it is important to avoid the roots being baked by the sun, so make sure your pots are in the shade during the fierce summer heat of Tenerife.

And if you have the urge to grow lemon trees in Britain, you’ll need to put them in a greenhouse before the frosts.

Lemons, like all citrus, resent fluctuations of temperature, humidity and light levels, so keep a daily eye on them.

And don’t despair if flowers or small fruits fall off because a substantial drop is natural and inevitable.

IKEA has launched a TV campaign against garden gnomes, inviting the public to “Make more of your Garden”.

The campaign, created by the Mother London company, features a 60-second advert and a two-minute music video, as well as outdoor, press and online ads.

Freddy Mandy, creative director at Mother, said: “To us, gnomes symbolise the lacklustre state of the nation’s gardens.

“They are tired, oldfashioned and uninspired. So we imagined the gnomes’ reaction to a family installing new, exciting, modern, garden furniture into their territory. It sparks a turf war, quite

literally.” The idea is to inspire people to give as much thought to how they furnish their outdoor space as they would any room inside of their house Peter Wright, IKEA marketing manager for the UK and Ireland, said: “It’s our ambition to continue the revitalisation and transformation of the IKEA brand.

“Our goal is to raise awareness of the wide range of outdoor solutions available in the IKEA store, which can help them transform their outdoor space.

“It will demonstrate how easy and affordable it is to treat your outdoor spaces just like any other room in the home, ultimately encouraging consumers to choose IKEA for all their outdoor home furnishing needs.”

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Health and Beauty

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It’s ‘You Time’!

By Carl from Robot

A SIMPLE oncea-day jab could be a lifeline for at least 1.5 million diabetes patients.

HAVE you forgotten what ‘You Time is in the rush of today’s world?

Have you forgotten what it feels like to have some special time to yourself?

Well, maybe it’s time you put things right by starting with one of the things that shows first about your image - your hair.

And just to repeat what many of our clients say to us: Having their hair done is a pleasure. It is time they spend away from work, from kids, from partners.

It’s a time for indulging in themselves and leaving the salon feeling so much better about their image.

Sometimes, it’s hard to believe that some people leave their hair

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A wonder diabetes jab could also solve obesity problems

for months, saying that they don’t have time to look after it.

But you all must surely have an hour or so every few weeks to keep up with your hair. Leaving it longer only makes thing worse.

It means that often, we have to remove more hair than normal because of the damage done over the months.

But seeing clients leave the salon looking and feeling better makes my job worthwhile. If you’re happy with what we do, then so are we!

It’s up to you to make the most of your salon time by asking questions about what we are doing with your hair.

This is how you build confidence with your stylists and gain their trust.

Often, though, clients don’t even tell us what they want, and we are left to get on with it.

It is the trust they have in us, built up over many salon visits. But leaving the salon with what they didn’t want is what most women hate about visiting in the first place.

Having You Time will remind you why you work (or worked) so hard - to be able to chill in the salon and leave feeling 100% better.

NO excuses! Now find that hour to pamper yourself and reap the benefits.

Not only could it help control their condition but it could also fight obesity.

The £1.90-a-day breakthrough treatment is far cheaper than using other similar drugs, and it could save the NHS at least £70million over the next five years.

Doctors can now prescribe Lyxumia to patients following this week’s approval by the European Medicines Agency.

They have hailed the treatment as a major new tool available to tackle the growing problem of Type 2 diabetes.

It works in tandem with insulin to regulate glucose levels in the body of patients who cannot keep this controlled with insulin alone.

Professor Anthony Barnett, Emeritus Professor of Medicine at the University of Birmingham, warned: “Eventually this disease is going to bankrupt the NHS if we don’t do something about it.”

“By getting blood glucose under control, we can actually help patients dramatically reduce the risk of longterm horrendous complications.”

Although many diabetes patients can control their condition with a

Health and Beauty

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Hormone pills could see off breast cancer as well

By Val Sainsbury WOMEN with a high risk of breast cancer could soon be given a drug to reduce their chance of getting the disease.

good diet and healthy lifestyle, it is a progressive disease and, if blood glucose remains uncontrolled, it can lead to serious complications such as heart attack, amputation and early death.

To keep their diabetes under control, many patients have to inject themselves with insulin several times a day to keep their blood sugar level steady.

Trials have shown that around 100,000 patients treated with insulin alone have glucose levels way over target.

A third of those could be helped with Lyudmila, which works by specifically reducing aftermeal glucose, as well as complementing the reduction in before-meal levels from the insulin.

It has an added benefit of helping patients lose weight by preventing the body from storing glucose in fat.

Professor Barnett, who is also a consultant physician at the Heart of England NHS Foundation Trust, said: “This is a very welcome new treatment option, particu-

larly for those patients with Type 2 diabetes now inadequately controlled on insulin.

“Early and aggressive treatment is critical.

The launch of Lyxumia, which is a highly-effective treatment for Type 2 diabetes, is an important part of an evolution of therapies, which may help combat the potentially-devastating consequences of this important disease.

“This combination looks fantastic, and this extra benefit is mainly due to this very profound reduction in post-meal glucose.”

The professor added: “Diabetes is a progressive disease, so we need more treatments. Single insulin is not sufficient for every patient. How best to manage these patients is to get blood glucose under control.”

Simon O’Neill, of Diabetes UK, said: “We welcome any new drug that gives more choice to patients and clinicians to help manage diabetes.

“It is a serious condition which, unless managed properly, can lead to devastating complications.”

The lives of nearly four million people are blighted by diabetes but relief appears to be at hand.

And the new treatment is much cheaper than others at around £54 for a 28-day supply, compared with £73.

This means that for every 100 patients, a further 33 can be treated for the same cost.

It has also been shown to cut dramatically the chance of patients suffering a dangerous attack, which is estimated to cost the UK at least £72.2million a year.

3rd May - 9th May 2013

Landmark research has found that taking the hormone pill tamoxifen - or three other similar drugs - can reduce the risk by 40%.

The aim is to reduce the odds of developing breast cancer in the first place - just as statins are given to patients to ward off heart disease.

Cancer Research UK estimates as many as 10% of women equivalent to around 500,000 people - are considered to be in the high-risk category.

Tamoxifen, which has been used to treat osteoporosis for more than 30 years, usually

after surgery, has saved the lives of hundreds of thousands at a cost of just a few pence a day.

But it is not currently approved as a preventative treatment for breast cancer in the UK. The other drugs involved in the research

3rd May - 9th May 2013

- raloxifene, arzoxifene, and lasofoxifene - are, primarily, all treatments for osteoporosis, the fragile-bone disease.

The National Institute for Health and Care Excellence (NICE), the watchdog responsible for advising the NHS on good practice, provi-

sionally recommended the medication in January. The organisation is likely to make a firm decision in the summer, in a move that could benefit up to half-a-million women.

A new study into the medical records of 83,000 women revealed that taking the drugs reduced their risk of developing breast cancer by 38%.

After five years of them taking the medication, the risk fell by 42%.

The drugs, known as selective oestrogen receptor modulators, target oestrogensensitive molecules on cells in the breast, and other parts of the body.

Research leader Professor Jack Cuzick, from Queen Mary, University of London, said: “These are very encouraging results.

“They pave the way for more widespread

use of these drugs in high-risk women in a manner similar to the way statins, which reduce cholesterol, and drugs which lower blood pressure, are used to reduce the risk of heart disease and stroke.”

The risk of breast cancer in the general population is one in eight, but this rises to one in three for high-risk women, and one in four for those whose risk is deemed to be moderate.

Almost 50,000 women a year are diagnosed with breast cancer. Of these, around 2,400 have inherited faults in known breast-cancer genes, while a further 5,000-7,000 are affected by genes not yet identified.

Previous international trials showed that tamoxifen reduced the risk of the most common kind of breast cancer by one-third

after five years, with the preventative effect lasting up to 20 years.

Experts say the cost to the NHS would be relatively low because the drugs are not branded, and fewer women would need treating for the disease.

Many breast cancers rely on the female sex hormone oestrogen to grow. These cancers are known as oestrogenreceptor positive (ERpositive) breast cancers Hormone-positive breast cancer cells have proteins called receptors, to which sex hormones attach.

When oestrogen comes into contact with the receptors, it fits into them and stimulates the cancer cells to divide so that the tumour grows.

Tamoxifen fits into the oestrogen receptor and blocks oestrogen from reaching the cancer cells. This means the cancer either grows more slowly, or stops growing altogether.

But despite the researchers’ positive results, the study showed that the drugs increased the risk of blood clots significantly, while tamoxifen raises the risk of developing womb cancer.

Hazel Nunn of Cancer Research UK, which funded the study, said: “These results provide some of the clearest evidence to date of the ability of these drugs to prevent breast cancer.

“The study also offers clarity on the frequency of side-effects, which can be expected from these drugs.”

She added: “Research like this has the potential to reduce the number of women diagnosed with the disease in the future.

“We look forward to the final guidance from NICE and hope it marks the time when women have more options to reduce their risk of breast cancer.

“These drugs have a range of side-effects, though, and they will not be suitable for all women. So we urge them to discuss their options with their doctors.”

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Food news

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Food News

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Girona restaurant leads the Spain world-beaters BRITISH trade journal Restaurant has chosen a Costa Brava restaurant as the “Best in the World”.

“The Oscar of the gourmet world,” is how the magazine describes the Celler de Can Roca,

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in Girona. During a London ceremony at the Guildhall, brothers Joan, Josep and Jordi Roca were presented with the award for their family-run business.

Danish restaurant Noma, the defending title-holders, hit the headlines recently after

63 diners suffered an upset stomach on the same night because a chef who was unwell passed on germs through the food.

Noma’s owner, René Redzepi, had been top of the list for the past three years and, despite the poor publicity, he

still came runner-up.

Among the world’s top 50 restaurants in the world, five are Spanish, and three of them feature in the top 10.

After Celler de Can Roca, the Basque eateries Mugaritz and Arzak, both in the

province of Guipúzcoa, are fourth and eighth respectively.

Until 2010, when Noma began its reign as the World’s Best Restaurant, El Bulli, owned by super-chef Ferrán Adrià and now closed, had dominated the list for four years.

Quique Dacosta, formerly El Poblet but now bearing the name of the chef and owner and based in the Dénia area of Alicante, tumbled from 12th to 26th place this year, and the Basque Country’s Asador Etxebarri, in the province of Vizcaya, fell from 31st to 44th.

El Celler started out from humble beginnings in a small premises, just next to the house of the parents, Josep Roca and Montse Fontané, owners of Can Roca, a bar-restaurant opened in Taialà-Germans Sàbat, a popular neighbourhood on the outskirts of Girona.

Their first premises were small. In 1991 they set their sights on can Sunyer, a country house, a hybrid of modernist and colonial styles built in 1911 by the architect Isidre Bosch i Bataller, standing just a few metres away from the family home.

After purchasing it they adapted it as a banqueting hall called la Torre de Can Roca.

Fifteen years later, in November 2007, – the new Celler was relocated to the Tower.

The former 170 square metre premises were quadrupled by a new and more comfortable premises: 200 square metres of kitchen, 200 of winery, 200 of dining room and 60 for the hall, plus a welcoming garden.

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Travel

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Manchester Airport has top UK vote Manchester Airport is named best in the UK, according to a survey by global travel search site Skyscanner.

Fifteen of the busiest airports in the UK were rated in a study by 1600 British flyers with Manchester, the third-busiest in the country, welcoming more than 19 million passengers each year, hitting the top spot. It was voted as having the best customer service, facilities and shopping as well as the best bars and restaurants.

Passengers of the airport also commended it for being well-organised, passenger-friendly and for its accessibility.

London Gatwick Airport, Britain’s secondbusiest handling more than 34 million passengers every year, came in second place, with passengers praising its staff and large check-in areas.

Newcastle just pipped Birmingham to the last podium spot and was voted by passengers as the easiest airport to travel though. Passengers of the airport commented on its simple layout and good choice of food and drink options.

At the other end of the scale, Aberdeen Airport, which handles more than 3 million passengers per year took the bottom spot and was given the thumbs down for its facilities including comments from its passengers that its baggage carousel area is in need of updating.

The UK’s two busiest airports performed well with both Gatwick and Heathrow making the top five. However, the three other main airports in the capital did not fare as well, with Luton, City and Stansted all named in the bottom five. Passengers of London City commented on its expensive parking, whilst Stansted was blasted for its extremely long queues at check-in.

The UK’s busiest airport and the fifth best overall, Heathrow was named the best airport in the UK for its transport links, earning 18% of the vote. Although the airport is served

by Heathrow Express, which has the dubious

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honour of being one of the most expensive trains journeys in the world, it is also served by several low cost options such as London Underground, Heathrow Connect and coach services.

Manchester Airport, which has its own train station and offers services linking the airport with over 100 destinations across the UK, came a close second with 15% finding the airport the easiest to get to in the country.

Gatwick Airport took third place with 12% of the vote, whilst Birmingham (9%) and London Stansted (6%) completed the top five.

Skyscanner’s Victoria Bailie commented: “The UK’s leading airports handle millions of passengers every year and the results of our study shows that whilst Manchester is the third busiest in the UK, it still manages to keep passengers happy. Many of the UK’s busiest airports including Gatwick and Heathrow performed very well in our study, particularly Heathrow which topped the transport poll.

Whilst the airport serves the busiest city in the UK, Heathrow offers passengers a variety of means to get to and from the airport to suit a range of budgets and if time is tight, passengers can travel to the airport from the central London in just 15 minutes.”

How passengers ranked the UK’s Airports: 1st: Manchester Airport 2nd: London Gatwick Airport 3rd: Newcastle Airport 4th: Birmingham International Airport 5th: London Heathrow Airport 6th: Liverpool John Lennon Airport 7th: Glasgow International Airport 8th: Edinburgh Airport 9th: East Midlands Airport 10th: Bristol Airport 11th: Belfast International Airport 12th: London Stansted Airport 13th: London City Airport 14th: London Luton Airport 15th: Aberdeen Airport

By Jav PEUGEOT's 2008 is one of the latest additions to the compact crossover class, which now includes models like the Nissan Juke and Vauxhall Mokka.

All systems go for summer getaway!

THOMSON and First Choice expect to take over 3.6 million holiday-makers away to destinations all over the world this summer.

It began officially on Wednesday and, after months of preparation, the last aircraft will leave the hangar, new resorts will open their doors for the first time and the largest cruise ship in the fleet will head across the Atlantic to sail the Mediterranean for the warmer climes.

Thomson Airways will make 19,500 round-trips to holiday hotspots and, in addition to engineers

at Hangar 61 ensuring the fleet of 57 aircraft are in tip-top condition, 3,200 hours have been spent hand-cleaning each plane.

They have also been busy laying over 10,000m of new carpet in the cabins, as well as creating room for nearly 400 new, extra-legroom seats.

On board, the 2,600 cabin crew will be serving over 100,000 cans of coke and recycling around half-amillion drinks cans.

This summer, the doors will open for the first time at new hotels, including the new 5-star Sensatori Resort in Turkey and the 5-star Holiday Village Majorca.

Nearly 3,000 Thomson

Aberdeen flights cancelled It’s not all good news for Thomson, however, as the tour operator has cancelled its summer flights from Aberdeen International Airport to Tenerife, allegedly, as there is no plane available.

The decision has been

made by Thomson’s parent company – TUI. Aberdeen International Airport was said to be VERY disappointed by the decision.

Thomson has said that circumstances for this were beyond its control.

and First Choice staff have arrived in over 60 resorts across the world, ready to welcome holiday-makers to nearly 3,000 hotels.

The spa teams are preparing for the 40,000 treatments, and Guest Relations’ teams are getting ready to hand out hundreds of thousands of wristbands in allinclusive resorts.

First Choice will teach over 4,000 kids to swim across its 12 Holiday Village Swim Academies, and Thomson’s overseas wedding experts will congratulate the 3,000 couples who will tie the knot on the beach this summer.

Thomson’s four cruise ships will take 120,000 passengers to 109 ports of call over the 22-

week summer period.

The ships will be fully stocked, and it is anticipated that 10,000 litres of ice cream, 60,000 litres of beer, 72,000 tea bags and 1,120kg of coffee will be consumed each week.

And the Entertainment Team having learned 80 dance routines will have a choice of over 2,000 costumes.

Ian Chapman, Director of Holiday Experience from Thomson & First Choice says: “This is always our busiest time of year as we prepare to take millions of people away on their summer holidays.

“As the weather has been so bad, people are even more excited about escaping to the sunshine, so it’s important we’re ready to welcome them.”

Barcelona airline takeover B A R C E L O N A- b a s e d airline Vueling has been successfully taken over by International Airlines Group, the parent company of British Airways and Iberia, which already

held a 45.85% stalk of the airline.

The 123.5-million euro deal, which valued Vueling shares at 9.25 euros per share, means that IAG now holds 90.51% of the airline.

3rd May - 9th May 2013

Motoring

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It takes the 208 supermini as its base, sharing engines and many of the interior components. It is front-wheel-drive only and all variants weigh just over a tonne.

As a result, fuel economy is as high as 74.3mpg in the 1.6-litre e-HDi 92 model.

There's a hint of 208 in the styling, but the 2008 is both wider and longer, as well as riding 96mm higher, and Peugeot hope to attract buyers away from cars like the Juke.

But if you’re thinking about buying a 208 ¬- prices are expected to range from around £17,000-£24,000 - take note that it’s also worth looking at the 2008 because Peugeot say the price gap between the two models is only about £800.

That said, the 2008 is clearly inspired by the 208, featuring the same stylish, swept-back headlights, bold chrome grille and defined creases.

A set of roof rails come as standard, while the slightly squared-off wheel-arches and rugged cladding help lend

Peugeot’s got a classy crossover

the 2008 a bit of an SUV look.

Entry-level Access+ models don't get alloy wheels; nor do they get some of the chrome additions which are reserved for the more expensive models.

Inside, it’s best to go for Allure trim because then you get stylish blue LED surrounds to the dials, and a lasercut LED pattern in the roof-lining.

Even so, even the cheaper models still look classy, with gloss black-and-satin chrome inserts throughout.

There's a range of eight engines for buyers to choose from, and the most favoured is the 1.6-litre e-HDi diesel, with either 91bhp or 113bhp.

Both provide more than enough punch, and both are incredibly refined on motorways -

even more so than the 1.6-litre petrol engine, which can sound a little strained.

And from early next year, a three-cylinder, turbo-charged petrol will replace the 1.6 petrol, improving refinement, performance and emissions.

The 2008 rides comfortably, despite a hint of firmness at slow speeds, and handles with a little more verve

than you’d expect of a high-riding car.

The steering is quick but a little lifeless, which means the 2008 corners well but lacks a bit of the fun factor.

It’s a small price to pay, however.

All the 2008 models come with six airbags as standard, and while it hasn’t yet been tested

by Euro NCAP, it should get the same five-star rating as the 208.

It’s a bit early to discuss reliability, but as the 208 has stood the test of time remarkably well, it’s likely the 2008 will perform just as well.

It is 200mm longer than the 208 supermini and is definitely a lot more practical. The boot is 75 litres larger, at 360 litres, and the back seats are more than spacious enough to seat tall adults.

Peugeot have concentrated on making the boot loading-lip nice and low, and you really notice it when you’re lifting heavy bags in to the back.

The 1.6-litre e-HDi diesel is the most efficient engine in the range, with CO2 emissions of 98g/km and fuel economy of 74.3mpg when combined with the EGC gearbox.

But the manual pushes fuel economy down to 70.6mpg, no matter whether you pick the 115bhp or 92bhp version.

The entry-level 1.4 HDi diesel performs just as well, with an official fuel economy of 70.6mpg.

The petrols aren’t quite as good, with the 120bhp 1.6 VTi managing 47.9mpg and the 82bhp 1.2 VTi claiming 57.6mpg.

Expect the threecylinder turbo engine, to better both of these figures, when it arrives early next year, while boasting as much as 130bhp.

The new Fiat - at full stretch!

THIS is first picture of Fiat’s production-ready 500XL, which has appeared on a Spanish internet forum.

It shows the new seven-seater version of the Fiat 500L in its full, elongated glory.

As you can see, it looks similar to the 500L from nose to C-pillar, but it has a longer rear over-

hang and larger rear, quarter-light windows.

There has not yet been official information from the company concern-

3rd May - 9th May 2013

ing the latest member of the Fiat 500 family.

But the 500XL is expected to measure around 200mm longer

than the 500L’s 4,147mm length.

The 500L and XL will mirror the five-seat Ford C-MAX and seven-seat Grand C-MAX model line-up.

So it is expected to feature a similar interior to the 500L, but with the addition of two, third-row rear seats, which can be folded up from the boot floor.

The engine line-up will probably mirror that of the 500L’s, which

includes the 105bhp 875cc TwinAir two-cylinder and 95bhp 1.4-litre four-cylinder petrol engines, together with the 85bhp 1.3-litre and 105bhp 1.6-litre Multijet diesels.

A Fiat spokesperson has confirmed that it is likely to debut at the Frankfurt Motor Show in September, with cars going on sale in Europe by the end of the year.

The 500XL becomes the fourth member of

the expanding Fiat 500 family, joining the supermini, convertible and 500L. And the range will also continue to grow with the arrival of the 500X crossover next year.

But although the 500XL name makes the most sense, it is not guaranteed for the production version because it could cause confusion with the 500X.

Page 45

Sport

www.canarianweekly.com

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Sport

Harry helps Knights KO Gaffers THE Tenerife Pool Tables semifinals on Tuesday saw two close encounters and a minor upset at the Treehouse.

By Roscoe

CD Tenerife 2 Fuenlabrada 0 Zamora 0 CD Marino 0 THE league table at the bottom of this article makes mighty fine reading for fans of CD Tenerife.

With just three games to go, they need just one victory to win the league and guarantee themselves entry to the winners’ play-off.

And they achieved this after their smoothest win of the campaign.

Tenerife have scored more. They have certainly been more dominant and outclassed their opposition this season.

But on Sunday, they produced their most polished performance against an improving, well-drilled team.

Manager Alvaro Cervera brought Inigo Ros back from suspension and, with Tarantino still injured, he handed Baltazar Rigo his home debut. And he would have a stormer!

In fact, bearing in mind that this team Position

ciplined. Marcos and Raul were excellent in the heart of defence, while goalie Basilio had a stormer.

Left-back Razvan had a battle royal with Suso, and I can easily see these lads being in the play-offs next season.

That said, this was Tenerife’s afternoon.

Rigo nearly opened the scoring after just seven minutes. Tenerife had a free-kick in a central position, 25 yards from goal, and while Basilio built his wall, Rigo was keen to get on with it.

He checked with the ref and then unleashed a pearler of a free-kick.

It was dipping under

have been top since week 2, it’s remarkable to think that Rigo is the 28th player to have been used this season.

He is also the seventh to play at centre-back.

Cervera is nothing if not ruthless.

On Sunday, Tenerife played with a swagger and a confidence that was found on a muddy field in Oviedo the previous week.

They played like a side who knew they had another couple of gears.

That said, Fuenlabrada deserve a lot of credit for the way they applied themselves.

They were well-organised, keen and disPoints

PLD Won Draw Lost

F

A

1 CD Tenerife

69 35 19 12 4 57

25

2 CD Leganés

63

35

18

9

8

52

33

3 Real Oviedo

59

35

16

11

8

50

32

4 Caudal Deportivo

57

35

16

9

10

46

33

5 Real Madrid CF C

55

35

15

10

10

54

36

6 Club Atlético de Madrid B

51

35

14

9

12

52

44

7 CF Fuenlabrada

50

35

12

14

9

48

43

8 UD Salamanca

49

35

12

13

10

52

43

9 Coruxo FC

48

35

13

9

13

37

44

10 Real Sporting B

46

35

11

13

11

44

45

11 Getafe CF B

45

35

10

15

10

33

29

12 Real Avilés CF

45

35

13

6

16

42

50

13 Club Marino de Luanco

44

35

12

8

15

37

46

14 CD Ourense

43

35

10

13

12

39

43

15 CD Guijuelo

41

35

10

11

14

30

45

16 UD San Sebastián de los Reyes 40 35 9 13 13 32 40 17 Zamora CF

36

35

5

21

9

39

49

18 Rayo Vallecano B

34

35

7

13

15

35

51

19 RSD Alcalá

34

35

8

10

17

23

42

20 CD Marino

28

35

7

7

21

30

59

Page 46

the bar, only for Basilio to backpedal and tip it over the top brilliantly.

Minutes later, a sweet Llorente cross was met perfectly by Aridane.

It was a bullet from 12 yards, but Basilio was perfectly placed to claw the ball out of the net.

However, Chechu pounced on the loose ball and his shot whizzed past Basilio.

Half the stadium were already on their feet, only for Marcos to throw himself at the ball and make the most amazing goal-line block. It was first-rate defending.

The chances racked up. Aridane twice had gilt-edged chances, and even hit a post, while Alberto should have opened the scoring just before the break.

The second half continued in the same vein but Tenerife, safe in the knowledge that there was no real attacking intention from the visitors, kept their heads up.

Halfway through the second half, a Rigo thunderbolt was arrowing its way into the top corner, only for Basilio to again tip it over.

It was annoying for the fans, but Cervera decided to go for another one of his masterstrokes. He took off centre-back Bruno and brought in Cristo Martin as he looked for the knockout punch.

(Sorry!).

Seconds later he was rewarded. Cristo’s move down the left drew the

centre-backs, and he played in Luismi. He bore down on goal and picked out Aridane, who had ghosted past Raul.

The pass was perfect and Aridane skilfully ( I know, I know) rounded Basilio and turned the ball home.

And, of course, just like waiting for a bus, you get two goals in three minutes, Not that any of the home fans were complaining.

Luismi’s corner was met at the near post by Rigo, who this time was able to beat Basilio with his header.

The former Numancia man deserved the plaudits and, after the disaster of Natalio and Julio Alvarez, maybe a Numancia capture will pay off?

Canarian Weekly ratings CD Tenerife: Aragoneses 6, Moyano 6, Bruno 7 (Cristo Martin 66min 6), Rigo 9, Llorente 7, Alberto 7, Ros 7, Suso 6 (Carlos 79min), Luismi 7, Chechu 6 (Yeray 71min 6), Aridane 6.

CF Fuenlabrada: Basilio 8, Anuarbe 5 (Josue 74min 5), Marcos 7, Raul 7, Razvan 7, Borja 6, Guti 6, Jesus Sanchez 6 (Lopez 74min 5), Ramos 6, Diego 5, Pachon 6 (Molino 63min 5) Second-place Leganes also won on Sunday to keep up the chase, but Tenerife should secure the title (not promotion) when they face Sanse.

The trip to north-west Spain is not the easiest,

and Tenerife had problems with Sanse last season. But they didn’t look the same outfit to me when they came to Santa Cruz in December and they were lucky to lose 3-0.

They are in the final relegation place and have won only twice at home since Christmas.

That said, their defence has tightened up in recent weeks.

A draw would be acceptable and, with Leganes no gimmes at Ourense, the league could be won on Sunday.

Meanwhile, spare a thought for CD Marino, who were officially relegated after drawing at Zamora.

The result was perfectly acceptable and they deserve credit for their efforts since January.

Their season just started too late. And when you think that they actually beat Fuenlabrada in the play-offs last season, it’s really a case of what might have been.

This Sunday they host Real Madrid C, and it’s a chance to see some future stars on show.

Real’s kids have done really well this season By the way…

KEEP an eye out for Omar Mascarell. He was born and raised in Tenerife and has had a superb season. He’s done so well, in fact, that he has had a few games for Real’s B team in Segunda Division.

What price he joins CDT on loan next season?

3rd May - 9th May 2013

The Chayofa venue recently celebrated their second anniversary, and they had a thrilling cuptie as part of the festivities.

Gaffers A have had a fine season, but they have not been at their very best over the last few weeks.

Yet they would still have been confident of sneaking past Phoenix Knights, who have probably underachieved in the league.

But on their night they are a match for anyone, as Gaffers discovered.

There was not much between the two sides and Gaffers will feel they had no luck as the match went to a oneframe shoot-out.

Harry was in control early on, but left the black in the jaws to give Ashley a chance to book the final place.

cal for a Bluebell B side who were always competitive. The 8-4 scoreline was about right.

But Peacocks had it a little tougher against Ryan’s Bar before coming through 7-5.

There was also some league action, and the race for third in Division One could go to the wire.

Phoenix Potters are in the spot at the moment and they were delighted to win 8-4 at Terrace A. It would have been closer had Sparky Mark not lost all three matches for the hosts.

In Los Cristianos, Palms A left Dreamers with all three points. In a fine match, Palms just

But the Burnley boy couldn’t see it out, leaving a happy Harry to book their first final.

Gaffers will meet Division One leaders Tenerife Hammers A, who started fast against Next Door and never let the Division Two frontrunners back in it.

The Hammers have timed their season to perfection, but Knights

The Darts AGM now at Bar 180 THE Oasis Darts League AGM, scheduled to be held at Xtreme Sports bar on Sunday, will now take place at Bar 180 on San Blas, Golf del Sur, because of unforeseen circumstances. It starts at 1pm as planned.

3rd May - 9th May 2013

will bust a gut to deny them the double at The Terrace Bar on 18th June.

The same Amarilla Golf venue and date will

see Palms A and The Peacocks duke it out for the Tenerife Pool Tables Plate.

Palms A, former Cup winners, were too clini-

Division 2 results

Tenerife Pool Tables Cup - Semi Finals

Phoenix Knights Next Door

7-6 3-9

Gaffers A Tenerife Hammers A

Tenerife Pool Tables Plate - Semi Finals

Bluebell B Ryans Bar

4-8 5-7

Palms A Peacocks

Division 1 Results Dreamers Bar Terrace Bar A

4-8 4-8

held their nerve a little better, as Gavin would tell you!

There were five matches in Division Two, where Exiles A are right on the heels of Next Door after seeing off Picasso’s 9-3.

They will need to win all five matches to win the league, but they have a real chance now.

Ryan’s Bar won their derby match with Shorty’s, while Toscales B gained a rare win over Picasso’s.

Palms B and Bar 13 shared the honours in Torviscas, as did James Place and Treehouse A after Greg’s last-frame success over Jim gave the visitors a nice point.

Palms Bar A Phoenix Potters

Division 1 Table

Table P W D L F A +- PTS 1 Tenerife Hammers A 30 27 1 2 245 115 130 82 2 Gaffers A 31 26 2 3 245 127 118 80 3 Phoenix Potters 30 16 7 7 194 166 28 55 4 Palms Bar A 30 17 3 10 189 171 18 54 5 Tenerife Hammers C 30 14 4 12 177 183 -6 46 6 Phoenix Knights 29 11 5 13 170 178 -8 38 7 Toscales A 31 11 5 15 181 191 -10 38 8 Dreamers Bar 31 11 4 16 179 193 -14 37 9 Terrace Bar A 29 9 9 11 169 179 -10 36 10 The Peacocks A 31 10 5 16 174 198 -24 35 11 Inn The Pink A 30 7 6 17 166 194 -28 27 12 Terrace Bar B 30 3 6 21 137 223 -86 15 13 Bar La Cana 30 4 3 23 126 234 -108 15

Exiles A James Place Palms Bar B Toscales B Shorty's

9-3 6-6 6-6 7-5 3-9

Picasso's The Treehouse A Bar 13 Picasso's Ryan's Bar

Division 2 Table

Table P W D L F A +- PTS 1 Next Door 32 26 3 3 264 120 144 81 2 Exiles A 31 24 5 2 256 116 140 77 3 The Treehouse A 30 21 5 4 235 125 110 68 4 James Place 32 20 5 7 240 144 96 65 5 Bluebell A 32 19 3 10 216 168 48 60 6 Gaffers B 33 18 4 11 227 169 58 58 7 Inn The Pink B 31 17 6 8 216 156 60 57 8 Ryan's Bar 31 17 5 9 223 149 74 56 9 Palms Bar B 32 17 5 10 226 158 68 56 10 Exiles B 32 16 7 9 224 160 64 55 11 Hoppys Bar 28 14 5 9 195 141 54 47 12 Picasso's 32 12 5 15 182 202 -20 41 13 Tenerife Pool Tables 31 9 5 17 168 204 -36 32 14 Bar 13 33 9 4 20 184 212 -28 31 15 Bluebell B 32 9 4 19 136 248 -112 31 16 Treehouse B 31 6 6 19 174 198 -24 24 17 Toscales B 32 5 2 25 141 243 -102 17 18 Shorty's 31 2 1 28 74 298 -224 7 19 Mountain Rangers 36 0 0 36 31 401 -370 0

Page 47

Puzzle

Fun Sudoku

The rules of sudoku X are simple - just enter the numbers 1 - 9 once in each row, column and 3 x 3 square within the sudoku X puzzle grid. In addition to standard sudoku, the numbers must only occur once in each side of the ‘X’ that is marked on the grid.

3 8 6 5 2 1 7 5

9

8 1

6

2

8 5

6 3 8 4 1 7 And 2 normal sudokus for you aswell...

2 9 5 1 9 8 6 1 3 9 8 6 3 2 1 5 3 1 8 6 3 7 6

6 5 7 9 2 1 4

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Wordsearch Find the words relating to Ice skating ARABESQUE ATTITUDE AXEL BALLET BIELLMANN BRACKET BULLET BUTTERFLY CAMEL CANNON BALL CHANGE FOOT CHOCTAW CORKSCREW CROSSOVERS DEATH DROP DOUBLE FALLING LEAF FLIP FLYING CAMEL FLYING SIT FOOTWORK HAIRCUTTER ILLUSION JUMP SPLIT LAYBACK SQUASH LOOP STAG LUNGE THREE TURN LUTZ TOELOOP MAZURKA TRIPLE MOHAWK TUCK MUSHROOM WALLEY ONE FOOT WALTZ PANCAKE WIND UP PIVOT ROCKER SALCHOW SCRATCH SHOOT THE DUCK SINGLE SITSPIN SPIRAL

Honeycomb Puzzle Fill in the triangles around each circle the digits 1 to 6 so that each digit is only used once per circle.

4 7

4

5

Last Issue's Answers:

Sudoku X:

6

7

x5 ÷15

+70 -28

x2

Answer

9

1/10 of this

Starter Number

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

8

9

x200

6

1 6

Page 48

-32

3

÷5 x11 -169

4 6 5 8 9

Beginner: 86 Intermediate: 95 Advanced: 115

50

2

372 -205 +23 ÷2

6 5

9

1

Intermediate

7 2 8 1

Brain Training:

Starter Number

+14

1 4 9 8

Beginner

8

1 2 7 3 9

8 3

30-Second Brain Training What better way to train your brain. Starting at the left with the number provided, work across each of these lines applying the mathematical instructions to your running total.

Don´t reach for the calculator - that´s cheating! Write your final answer in the last box of the line. Aim to complete each round in about 30 seconds. Good Luck!

squared

5 7

Advertisement

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Advanced Sudoku:

7 8 6 2 4 5 3 1 9

6 5 1 8 7 2 4 3 9

3 6 5 9 2 4 7 1 8

1 2 4 9 7 3 5 8 6

8 2 4 3 5 9 6 1 7

8 7 4 1 3 6 5 9 2

9 5 3 1 8 6 2 4 7

7 3 9 6 4 1 5 2 8

9 1 2 8 5 7 4 6 3

2 1 9 4 5 7 8 6 3

9 8 6 1 2 7 3 4 5

6 8 7 3 9 5 2 4 1

4 3 5 8 6 2 7 9 1

1 7 3 5 6 4 9 8 2

4 9 3 7 1 2 8 5 6

8 6 7 3 9 1 4 2 5

2 4 5 9 8 3 1 7 6

2 5 1 6 4 8 3 7 9

6 7 1 5 2 8 9 3 4

3 1 8 7 9 5 2 6 4

7 2 9 4 6 3 1 8 5

3 4 8 7 1 9 6 5 2

5 6 2 4 1 8 7 9 3

5 4 6 2 8 1 9 3 7

5 9 2 6 3 4 1 7 8

4 9 7 2 3 6 8 5 1

1 3 8 5 7 9 6 2 4

1/8 of this

Answer

4/5 of this

Starter Number

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

213 ÷3 +133 ÷2 x4 8

÷6 +723 -505 9

÷11 x23

Answer

3rd May - 9th May 2013

3rd May - 9th May 2013

Page 49

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stand bag, in good condition, 70 euros. Tel: 661 euros. Tel: 679 884 888 187 334 Men’s Vans shoes, 2 pairs, size 45, or 11 to 12 UK Free Adverts Resin table tops, good for bars/terraces, various sizes, one pair charcoal and orange, worn 4 times, sizes, 20 euros each. White desk with 3-draw good condition, 25 euros. Other pair worn once, piece, 25 euros. Wilson golf clubs, complete set very good condition, blue and black, 35 euros. Tel: with bag, 55 euros. 5 wooden dining chairs, light 636 563 051 colour, 12 euros each. Vertical four-speed, swing Electric oven, TEKA, vgc, 80 euros. TEKA 4-ring control, 10 euros. Canon fax, good working order, Full set of Dunlop golf clubs, including bag, nearly ceramic hob, fingertip control, 30 euros, or 100 25 euros. Nokia mobile telephones (movistar), 10 new, 180 euros o.n.o Also separate Big Bertha euros for both. Large black computer chair, 15 euros each. Footjoy golf shoes size 8, 10 euros, 2 drivers, from 25 euros. Tel: 669 948 660 euros. Buyer collects. Callao Savaje. Tel: 922 723 divan bed bases, 10 euros each. Tel: 690 676 527 489 or 663 679 318 Drop-side cot, 50 euros. 2 wet suits, medium & SANYO flat screen TV, 36in HD ready HDMI, black large, 20 euros each. Spear gun, 50 euros. Tel: 922 and silver stand, as new, 210 euros. San Isidro Tel: 2 double glass-fronted fridges, 500 euros each. 713 940 667 372 871 2 stainless steel bottle dumps, 2m long, 500 euros each. Double and single fryers, 250 euros.

Smart Phone, Samsung Galaxy mini, sim free Folding bike, 16in wheels, Plancher 80cm wide, electric, 300 euros. Stage GT-S5570 in box, complete with charger, spare lights, 8 Cans, 2 stands and controller 500 euros. brand-new, no gears, 130 euros, battery and instructions in English, 70 euros.

400-watt amplifier 250 euros, 800-watt 350 euros.

Wii Game Bully Scholarship Edition, complete Tel: 627629 962 Bose speakers 802, 500 euros. Table, chairs and English version (unwanted gift), 10 euros. Sony stools from 25 euros. Stainless-steel hand-wash 30 books in Italian, various subjects, spiritual, Ericsson Spiro slide phone white (Walkman) sink, 250 euros. Various interior doors, wood and novels, Italian cookery, dictionary and DIY, 15 new battery, in box with Movistar pay-as-youglass, 75 euros each. Tel: 686 828 953 euros for all, or 50 cents each. 20 stamps, old go sim, 30 euros. Brother electric typewriter collection, 20 euros. Wilson tennis racquet, 6 AX100 in box, as new, spare ribbon, cost 100 Complete Spanish course, 10 euros. Complete euros. Clarke’s scrubbing, polishing, wet pick- euros new, 40 euros. Binatone big-button, simchildren’s Spanish course, 10 euros. Riding boots, up machine with 2 tanks and base, 130 euros. free mobile phone, flashing call light, panic Size 34, hardly used, 10 euros. Riding boots Size Pure wood salon doors, with hinges ready to button, manual lock switch and charging dock, 37, hardly used, 10 euros. Children’s books by fit, 12in x 45in , suit bar or kitchen, 30 euros. 3 white, 30 euros. Pine square-sided table, 20 Jacqueline Wilson, 1 euro each, over 30 titles, chefs’ large aprons, brand-new in bag, 6 euros. 1 euros. Modern china cabinet, quality wood and great condition. Girl’s bike, suit12-14-year-old, pair brand-new jeans, men’s very large, size 54, glass-dome top with light, excellent condition, silver, Monty make, 40 euros.

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22 Nao figurines, all boxed, from 40 euros. Tel: 676 player, 45 euros. Small toastie-maker, hardly used, 2 bedroom chairs, Queen Anne Style, 50 euros for 051 341 10 euros. Fañabe area. Tel: 628 824 564 both. Wooden-framed, floral-upholstered chair/ lounger, 20 euros. Silencio area, buyer to collect.

Sony DCR-DVD digital, Sony MD recording video 2-seater sofa as new, removable washable, Tel: 662 354 391 or 665 934 280 camera recorder, 100 euros. Playstation 2, slim biscuit-coloured upholstery, 250 euros. Tel: 922 with controller, 60 euros. Panasonic DMC -FZ 50 784 174 or 634 333 744.

18 x glass candle holders and trays, brand new, 15 mega lumix camera, 100 euros. Gemini CDJ-20 euros. 10L fyer, 80 euros ONO. Second hand mens professional CD player, 100 euros. DVD player, 20 Beatles Abbey Road framed poster, 40 euros. golf shoes, size 11, 35 euros. Picnic set with plates, euros. Tel: 686 336 904 Beatles Blue double album, blue vinyl, 20 euros. cutlery etc. brand new, 10 euros. Double sided Beatles Red double album, red vinyl, 20 euros. musical play mat, 10 euros. Fairy shoe house and Full set Wilson blackjack golf clubs, graphite Beatles collectors’ singles, boxed Set, (box tatty) fairy tree house plus 2 fairies, 15 euros. Brand shafts, 3 hybrid 4-9 irons, pitching wedge, sand singles not played, 70 euros. Beatles Anthology new bronze heel shoes, size 36, 5 euros. Tel: 637 wedge and putter, 3 wood, 5 wood and driver, inc hardback, 25 euros. Beatles illustrated lyrics, 20 206 026.

1

2

Longlets:

Property

Property for SALE

PROPERTY FOR SALE

Lockup garage (4 spaces) Golf del sur.

Underground garage parking spaces, Golf del sur.

Storage warehouse . Golf del sur.

Poolside cafe/bar, Golf del sur.

Tel 637 819 680

Property for RenT

Call us now on 629 128 667

Jobs Full time stylists and nail technicians required for Robot Salon in Los Cristianos. Terms and conditions negotiable. For more information contact Carl on 922 789 058.

Phone: Suzanne on 680 831 497 e.mail : enquiries@canarygetaway.com website : www.canarygetaway.com Callao Salvaje 3 Bed Villa with Pool, Large Terraces, immaculate 1200€ 3 Bed Apartment in Central Los Cristianos, Large Terrace & Pool on Complex, 750€ inc Bills Studio in Los Cristianos, Pool on complex, 400€ incl bills

3

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Los Cristianos, 1 Bed in El Mirador, Tastefully Furnished, 580€ incl bills 3 Bed Townhouse in Los Girasoles, Fanabe, Large Terrace & Gated Complex, 900€ Callao Salvaje, 1 Bed Apartment, Refurbished & spacious in a quiet location, 450€ incl bills Chayofa, 4 bedroomed villa With private pool, 1250€ Many more properties available, apartments, villas & Fincas

Sales reps are required for Quality qualified fly buy clients. Contract given, excellent commissions and spiffs paid. Call Marie on 922 729 364 Diamond Resorts International is now hiring sales professionals in Tenerife. We are expanding our cold line and in house operations. Incomparable earning potential and incredible career growth opportunities. No experience required. Full training will be provided. Contact us today on EU.Recruitment@diamondresorts.com or call 922712610

How to submit your free adverts: PHONE 902 232 102 / FAX 902 232 102 / Email: classified@canarianweekly.com Just pop in the office in Las Chafiras (next to the Golf Shop). Deadline for Free ads has changed to Tuesdays at 4pm 3rd May - 9th May 2013

CARS BOUGHT FOR CASH - Offer made once seen, we will come to you. WANTED small cars to medium cars, 4 X 4’s, small vans, people carriers, runners and non runners, accident damaged, etc. ANYTHING CONSIDERED.

Somebody somewhere must have some available apartments for next winter My list of Norwegian pensioners who are looking for apts. for next winter 2013/2014 in Los Cristianos or Playa de las Americas is growing by the day and it’s a shame to disappoint them.

NO FINDERS OR CONTRACT FEES. I am always looking for more properties in all shapes and sizes in Los Cristianos, so if you would like to rent out your property please contact me and I will come and visit you.

IMPORTANT. I am also looking for wheelchair friendly properties with roll in showers/wet rooms.

If you have anything suitable please contact me asap.

bargain of the week

Page 50

Los Cristianos : Parque Tropical II, 1 bed 1st. floor apt., 600€ + bills, fully furnished.

1 bed 3rd. floor apt., 600€ + bills, fully furnished.

2 bed 3rd.floor penthouse apt. 990€ + bills, fully furnished.

The Heights, 2 bed ground floor apt., 700€ + electric, fully furnished, available from June 15th.2013.

1 bed 3rd. floor apt., 550€ + electric, fully furnished, available from now until December 31st.

Niravana, 1 bed ground floor apt., 500€ + gas, fully furnished.

Golf del Sur : Winter Gardens,1 bed 2nd. floor apt., 550€ + bills, fully furnished.

Chayofa : La Finca, 1 bed ground floor apt., 450€ incl. up to 50€ of bills, fully furnished.

Los Menores, 1 bed ground floor apt., 450€ incl.bills, fully furnished.

Cars wanted

3rd May - 9th May 2013

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Service Point

www.canarianweekly.com Cleaning

Jobs (cont.)

Construction (cont.)

www.canarianweekly.com

Service Point Patio Doors & Windows

Kitchens & bathrooms (cont.)

Due to expansion of our website, SellMyTimeshare. tv are now hiring telesales consultants. If you have experience of Timeshare, Timeshare resales or reclaim, then contact us for an immediate start.

This is a fully legal position with a basic wage, great spiffs and bonuses. Call 922 71 77 41 or email callcentremanager@sellmytimeshare.tv

ALUMINIUM & PVC

VISIT OUR SHOWROOM in Granadilla! Call for directions

Tel: 922 778 050 Fax 922 778 051

New in Las Galletas, elegant, discreet & obliging girls, all services available, come & enjoy them, call 669 738 298

www.celjucanarias.es

Hello baby!!! I´m your most exciting dream. Super sexy hot young beauty. Lovely slim body, gorgeous curves, all for your needs and pleasure. Call (0034) 690 900 739

Specialists in security shutters and blinds, locks security glass and grills.

QUALIFIED FITTERS AND FULL GUARANTEES Free no obligation survey & quotation. We speak English & German!

Apartments, offices, houses, bars, one offs or regular cleans. Call Jennie on 676 885 440 or Sharon on 616 128 668 for a quotation today.

Veronica, a loving Columbian girl in Los Cristianos, in front of the Hotel Aguamar, call 20 minutes before, check out www.sexocanario. com or www.sexocanario.es call 654 091 101.

Mobile 696 889 048

Email: celjucanarias@celjucanarias.es

Spotless Cleaning Service

Personal ServiceS (cont.)

Exotic 25 year old Brazilian girl in Los Abrigos, big breasts, will visit.

Call 688 324 096.

Naomy, a hot, half cast girl in Los Cristianos, big breasts, natural French. 30 euros. Call 663 421 570.

Cleaning

Erika, an attractive Brazilian girl in Los Cristianos, loving, massage, kisses & cuddles, natural French, complete Greek, toys, hotel visits, in front of the Hotel Aguamar, Call 654 111 670 or 655 784 373.

Lawyers

Young beautiful escort would like to visit discrete gentleman for sexy time. Good English spoken. (0034) 603 111 478 PARADISE in Los Cristianos!!!! Young beautiful international girls, clean, discreet, www.masajesparadise.com call 639 101 096 Las Americas, 40yrs, blonde, sexy, sympathetic, massage & more.

Tel: 660 618 331.

CLUBS & SOCIETIES

4

An opportunity to meet and socialise at the Castañuelas restaurant, seafront, Los Cristianos, near the Sunday market.

Every Wednesday at 7.30pm. To reserve your place call Nancy on 655 679 033. No dinner in June.

Service Point

Computers

Telephone: 902 811 069

Air-conditioning

E-mail: Computer Service Provider BT Authorised Dealer Dell Registered Partner

info@act-tenerife.com

Electrician

Mechanics

Web:

www.act-tenerife.com

CCTV, wifi, hotspots, networks, ADSL, internet kiosks, till and touch screens, biz support + IT, apple, hosting, repairs, audio/ video, karaoke, free quotes, fully qualified, call Intech 608 186 642 / 922 775 378 / info@intechnetworks.es

Blinds

Yeni, Venezuelan girl in Los Cristianos, natural big breasts, kisses, cuddles, different positions, 24 hour service, hotel-home visits, speaks a little English.

Call 610 359 991

Personal ServiceS

Plumbing

Construction Garden Furniture

Plumbing (cont.)

Cars to Rent

Mar, a loving Mexican girls in Los Cristianos, complacent, natural French, kisses, massage & much more, 24 hour service, hotel-home visits, in front of the Hotel Aguamar.

Call 660 938 631.

PartY planning

Cars Insurance

Long & Short Term From 270 euros per month including Insurance.

Phone Mags on 600 882 722 or email magsbehan@gmail.com

Meliza, good looking Latin girl in Los Cristianos, great curves, big breasts, kisses, French, toys, in front of Hotel Aguamar, 24 hour service, hotel-home visits, speaks a little English, call 628 895 416.

Chiropodist Ann Malpass M.A.F.H.P. M.C.F.H.P. Qualified Chiropodist. All your foot care needs solved in the comfort of your own home/hotel. Tel 625 799 570 Elaine Watson Jones MSSCh MBCHA, serving the community from El Medano to Los Gigantes for 13 years. Telephone 608 029 790

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Kitchens & bathrooms Colin Taylor – Renovations & Maintenance, Bathrooms, Kitchens, Tiling, Plumbing etc. (e.g. complete bathroom & kitchen refurbishments, including all materials & labour from under 2000 euros) Tel 661 081 843 for quotation.

3rd May - 9th May 2013

3rd May - 9th May 2013

Boiler King: All plumbing works undertaken including boiler replacements, drain clearance, swimming pool pump repair & maintenance. Tel: 680 278 579

Pool tables

Removals UNIVERSAL EXPORTS S.L. PROFESSIONAL REMOVALS TO AND FROM THE U.K. Email: info@removals-tenerife.com Transport Licence: No. 11572932 C.I.F. No. B38820395 Tel: 922 720 711

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Service Point Removals (cont.)

ALADDINS CAVE. Antiques & Vintage Goods bought & sold Tel: 922 720 493

www.canarianweekly.com security (cont.)

Translation (cont.)

TENERIFE TRANSLATION SERVICES

Over 20 years experience. Official Translations, Medical, Conveyancing, Notary, Wills, Utilities, Insurances, Building licences Etc.. Transport available if required. Professionalism & Confidentiality guaranteed.

Repairs

For these and many more call Tracey on 666 857 991 info@tenerifetranslationservices.com

TV and Satellite Menny Fix, Satellite TV Tel 922 792 116 Avnd; Antonio Dominguez 18, Edif: MarOLa Local 2, Los Cristianos. EST 1994, Repairs, Maintenance and Sales.

upholstery Second-hand furniture

Tiling

Colin Peel Second-hand Shops

Furniture & Household Items bought for cash Immediate decisions

Phone Freddie 609 303 634

Tiling Specialist

For All Your Tiling Needs: Bathrooms, Kitchens & Floors Most Aspects of Building Work Undertaken

Tel: 679 736 409

Windows

Translation

Rotations, call Gary on 922 790 822 or 662 496 422, closed every other Saturday.

security

British Consulate Address: Plaza Weyler, 8, 1º, 38003 Santa Cruz de Tenerife.

Public opening hours from 1st July 2012: Tuesdays & Fridays: 08.30hrs – 13.30hrs Notarial services: Please consult our webpage or call 902 109 356 or alternatively +34 913 342 194 for further information on how to make an appointment. Please note, we are no longer able to provide notarial services without prior appointment.

Emergency Assistance: Assistance is available 24hrs a day, 7 days a week by calling us on 902 109 356 or alternatively +34 913 342 194 E-mail: info.consulate@fco.gov.uk Web:http//: ukin spain.fco.gov.uk British Consul: Steve Jones British Vice-Consul: Helen Keating Cosumer Office Tel: 922 76 16 00 Town Hall Tel: 922 76 16 00 Emergencies Emergency Services (All) Tel: 112 National Police Tel: 091 Local Police Tel: 092 Ambulance Tel: 061 Fire Brigade Tel: 080 Guardia Civil Tel: 062 Multi-lingual police central office Tel: 902 102 112 Call this number and ask to speak to an English operator to make

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3rd May - 9th May 2013

Service Point

www.canarianweekly.com a report or official complaint.

Local Police Tel: 922 75 70 06 Red Cross Emergencies and Ambulances Tel: 922 28 18 00 Information and Blood Bank Tel: 922 28 29 24 International MEDSERVICE Tel: 922 79 05 63 Medical Benefits Agency Tel: (00 44) 191 218 7547 For if you find yourself in medical difficulties whilst on holiday and without the proper holiday insurance.

Pharmacy Information and Locator (24 hours) Tel: 922 28 24 24 Citizen Information Tel: 010 Postal Services Tel: 902 19 71 97 International Operator Tel: 11825 Local Operator Tel: 11818 Tourist Information Tel: 922 60 55 90 Hospitals & Medical Centres (Answering Machine) Tel: 094 Hospital Las Americas, Playa de las Americas Tel: 922 75 00 22 Playa de Las Americas Centro Medicos Del Sur Tel: 922 79 10 00 Candelaria Hospital Tel: 922 60 20 00 Beach Safety Obey the beach warning flags and always supervise children when near water.

Red - Strong currents do not swim Yellow - Strong winds and turbulent sea conditions.

Take care.

3rd May - 9th May 2013

Green - Safe to swim Shopping Most shops open from Mon - Sat 09:00 - 13:00 then 16:00 - 20:00 Some shops may open for just Saturday Morning, and many shops are closed on Sundays and Tourist Offices, Bank Holidays, with the exception of souvenir shops which tend to open 7 days a week.

Tourist Offices Tenerife Sur Tourist Office (Main Tourist Office) Tel: 902 00 31 21 Santa Cruz de Tenerife Tel: 922 28 93 94 Santiago de Teide Tel: 922 86 03 48 Costa Adeje Tel: 922 75 06 33 Puerto de la Cruz Tel: 922 38 60 00 El Medano Tel: 922 17 60 02 La Laguna Tel: 922 63 11 94 La Orotava Tel: 922 32 30 41 Las Galletas Tel: 922 73 01 33 Los Cristianos Tel: 922 75 71 37 Los Llanos de Aridane Tel: 922 40 18 99 Playa de las Américas Tel: 922 79 76 68 Playa de las Vistas Tel: 922 78 70 11

Telephone numbers: Flight Information 902 404 704 (lines open 24 hours) Airport Information Tel: 922 75 90 00 Tourist Information Tel: 922 392 037 TFN - Tenerife Norte airport (Los Rodeos) For all domestic flights and some scheduled international and mainland ser-

vices.

Telephone numbers: Flight Information Tel: 902 404 704 (lines open 24 hours) General Information Tel: 922 635 800 Buses TITSA is Tenerife´s public bus company.

Tel: 922 53 13 00 The ´Bono-Bus´ discount card can be purchased from all TITSA

stations and terminals of TITSA and reduces the cost of transport by up to 30%.

Radio Taxis Tel: 922 64 11 12 N.B. Taxi cabs display a special SP (Servico Público) licence plate.

Arona Taxis Tel: 922 74 75 11 National Ferry Services Fred Olsen Tel: 922 62 82 52

Weather Outlook

Tour Operators Thomson Tel: 922 79 86 07 TUI Tel: 922 77 77 20 Thomas Cook Tel: 922 757 409 Cosmos Tel: 922 793 802 Transport TFS - Tenerife Sur Airport (Reina Sofia) For flights from the Spanish mainland and nearly all scheduled international flights.

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3rd May - 9th May 2013