Cw issue 854

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Issue 854 23rd May - 29th May 2014

Inside this week...

BULLS FIGHT BACK!

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Matadors are sent packing to hospital as bulls fight back! MANY people find the idea of bullfighting repulsive, but the new season got underway this week … and the beasts had their revenge!

There were extraordinary scenes on Tuesday at Madrid’s prestigious Las Ventas bullring, which had the honour of hosting the year’s first event. All three professional bull-fighters were hospitalised and so, for the first time in 35 years, the San Isidro festival, had to be suspended. Las Ventas is the “Wembley” of bullfighting arenas, and the opening night is seen as something special. But this year’s will be remembered for the horrific injuries sustained by David Mora. As we go to print, the matador is still in a serious condition after being gored. The night opened with a “contest” between Mora and a fierce 532-kilogram black bull named Deslio. It literally came out fighting, knocking the matador to the floor in early exchanges. Mora tumbled to the sand and appeared to get caught up in his cloak. The bull immedi-

ately charged, head down, and rammed a horn deep into the matador’s leg, tossing him around like a rag doll. Bullfighting correspondent Antonio Lorca wrote in El Pais newspaper: “The somersault was horrific, shocking, chilling, impossible for the human eye to witness, yet evident to the mind.” Mora’s suffering continued as Desilo gored him twice more, one attack slicing open a 30-centimetre gash on the thigh, while another slammed into his armpit. Help came in the form of another matador, Antonio Nazare, who

raced to the scene and swiftly killed the bull with his sword in front of a stunned audience. Amazingly, as Mora was rushed off to hospital, the show continued and Nazare was introduced to his own foe. This brown bull was even bigger than the first one and weighed in at a massive 537 kilos. It was called Feten and, just like the late Desilo, was in the mood for a row. And it was déjà vu for the crowd as Feten struck Nazare in the knee, forcing the matador to seek medical help. As Nazare was gulping down pain-killers

in the bullring hospital, a third matador was summoned. Saul Jimenez Fortes squared off with Feten and, again, he got the treatment. Feten swiftly skewered the matador in the thigh, and a second charge found the pelvis. Fortes would later reveal his three 10-centimetre-deep wounds, but he battled through the pain to finally slay the beast. After that “win”, the rest of the night’s battles were cancelled because, for a change, a shortage of matadors rather than bulls. An official statement said: “The festival is suspended because of the

gorings suffered by the three matadors. “In the 68-year history of San Isidro, only two bullfights have been suspended for gorings of matadors, both in 1979.” Traditionally, three advertised matadors spar with two bulls each, and there are six bulls used per event. However, the lack of human fighters did have a happy ending as four bulls were returned to their pens, safe and sound. And, presumably, ready to fight another day. Bullfighting is on the decline in Spain and many see the “sport” as barbaric. A recent survey revealed that 60% of Spaniards are now opposed to bullfighting, which is, of course, banned in the Canary Islands. That measure came into effect in 1991 but recently there was a motion tabled to reintroduce the sport. But this has gained little support and Tuesday’s incident is unlikely to change any hearts and minds. Spain holds an estimated about 2,000 bullfights annually and the sport still has a cultural heritage status. Besides Spain, bullfighting is also practiced in France, Ecuador, Mexico, Peru, Portugal, Colombia, and Venezuela. Anti bullfighting campaigners claim that worldwide more than 250,000 bulls, cows and calves are abused and slain during bullfights and similar events every year. Tuesday’s events have been seen world-

wide condemnation for the sport. Well known Hindu statesman Rajan Zed (pictured) has called for a ban. In a statement he said that Spain should follow the example of its regions Catalonia and Canary Islands and ban bullfighting altogether. He said “This is barbaric, inhumane, horrendous, cruel and unacceptable. Spain could easily find other ways to entertain its citizens and visitors.” Zed, who is President of Universal Society of Hinduism, also urged other countries to outlaw bullfighting practice. He believes the European Union should impose a ban on all blood-sports. Zed said “We have long been out of the caves. Let us get rid of these outdated traditions. The world would be a better place without these blood-sports. Bullfighting is just plain cruelty and unnecessary tormenting and abuse of the animals and is not an art form.” The number of Matadors being seriously injured has risen in recent years. In 2008 Jose Tomas was badly injured in Cordoba while in 2010 Julio Aparico fared even worse. He was gored through the throat and suffered horrific injuries which needed three operations to repair. And in Zaragoza in 2011 Juan Jose Padilla lost an eye and was paralyzed down the left side of his face after a bulls horn smashed through his jaw and pierced his eyeball.


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Choose your EU candidate IF you are a citizen of the EU and have registered on both the local “padrón” and census, you can vote in the EU elections on Sunday.

But do remember that you have just one vote, so if you are planning to be in the UK, say, you cannot vote here and there! Spain will elect 54 deputies to the European Parliament and you should have received confirmation though the post, telling you where your polling

station is, There have been some changes to voting stations, notably for voters in Playa Paraíso and Costa Adeje. Polling stations are open all day until 8pm on Sunday, and you must bring some form of photo identification with you - Spanish ID, passport, driver’s licence (if it has a photograph) or residency certificate. Officially, the document doesn’t have to be up to date, but it must be the original. Once your turn comes, you approach the table and identify yourself to the officers. Unlike in some

Playa Paraíso In previous elections residents of Playa Paraíso voted in the Callao Salvaje Cultural Centre, however this year there are changes, due to the creation of a new electoral section, ‘sección 17’. Voters who live in the following streets will now vote in the Armeñime station: Armeñime Cultural Centre Polling Station Sección 17 tables U • Adeje 300,– the whole street • Aljibe, (El) , the whole street • Andenes, (Los) , 1- 13 • Galgas, (Las), 1- 18 • Horno, (El), the whole street • Idafe, 1-59 • Ladera (La), 1- 20 • Loma (La), the whole street • Pinque, (El), the whole street • Playa Paraiso, 1- 101 • Vega, (La), 1- 31 • Vera, (La), 1- 21 Costa Adeje There are a number of changes for residents in Costa Adeje from Playa las Américas to San Eugenio Alto, due to the creation of a new ‘seccíon 18’. Therefore people who might have voted previ-

countries, you won’t be handed a ballot paper. Instead, in the actual pooling booth, you will find lists of all the Spanish candidates. The political parties have already chosen their own list of candidates to represent them. Those lists are printed off and placed in the booths with the names of the parties at the top of each list and the candidates underneath. You cast your ballot by choosing one of the lists, placing it in the envelope and then in the ballot box at the electoral table. Simple as that!

Where can you vote? ously in the Magma Arte y Congresses centre may find they are now voting in the Costa Adeje (Las Américas) Bus Station or the Miraverde Cultural Centre. Check below for your street name and number. Miraverde Cultural Centre Sección 18, tables A-B • Andorra, the whole street • Aragon, the whole street • Asturias, 1- 99 • Atenas, 1-99, 2-98 • Baleares, 2-20, 1-23 • Beirut, 1- 2 • Berna, 1-10 • Cantabria, the whole street • Ceuta, the whole street • Dublin, the whole street • Extremadura, the whole street • Galicia, the whole street • Ifonche, 1-44 • Lisboa, 1-44 • Madroñal, 26-60, 67 • Melilla, the whole street • Murcia, the whole street • Navarra, the whole street • Rioja, (La), the whole street

Costa Adeje Bus Station Sección 7, tables A-B • Antonio Navarro • Argentina, 1-4 • Bolivia, 1-4 • Bruselas (De), 1-11 • Colon, (De) the whole street • Comarcal, 2 -26, 1-45 • Cuba, 1-4 • Ernesto Sarti, the whole street • España, (De) the whole street • Eugenio Dominguez Afonso, 1-4 • Gran Bretaña, the whole street • Guatemala, the whole street • Londres, 1-4 • Paraguay, the whole street • Paris, 1-14 • Pueblos (De los), the whole street • Rafael Puig Lluvinia, the whole street • Republica de Panama, the whole street • Roma, 1-6 • Uruguay, the whole street • V Centenario, the whole street • Valencia, 1-6 • Venezuela, the whole street Sección 11 table U

Alemania, 2-18, 1-9 • Austria, the whole street • Caldera, (La), the whole street • Cataluña, 1-16 • Diario de Avisos, 1-17 • Dinamarca, 1-17, 2-4 • Europa, the whole street • Finlandia, the whole street • Francia, the whole street • Grecia, 1-7 • Irlanda, the whole street • Islandia, 1-4 • Italia, 1-6 • Madrid, the whole street • Noruega, 1-7, 2-4 • Pais Vasco, the whole street • Paises Bajos, 1-3, 2-6 • Pasaje de Austria, 1-99 • Portugal, 1-10 • Suecia, the whole street • Suiza, the whole street • Vista Bella, 1-12

If you are still unsure or have more questions, you can check with the council by phone, 922 756200, or 922 531750.


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Ryanair’s new Wales link RYANAIR has given our tourist trade another boost with the news that the Irish airline will be flying from Tenerife to Cardiff from October.

This new Welsh route will begin on 30th October – and it is hoped the company will deliver over 15,000 customers a year to the Island. It’s a weekly service to begin with, and Ryanair says prices will start from just £39.99 for travel in November. Kate Sherry, Ryanair’s Deputy Director of Route Development, said: “Consumers and visitors already choose Ryanair for

the lowest fares, great route choice and our industry-leading customer service. “Now, they can also book their flights on our improved website, carry a free, small, second carry-on bag, enjoy allocated seats and use their personal electronic devices at all stages of their flight.” Cardiff Airport’s Chief Executive, Jon Horne, said: “We are delighted that Ryanair has chosen Cardiff as its 15th UK departure airport. “We see this as a major opportunity to increase choice for our customers. This development fits perfectly with our strategy to grow the number of low-cost airlines and flights available from Cardiff.”

It’s costing a fortune! FILLING your shopping trolley with essentials costs more in the Canaries than almost anywhere else in Spain.

That’s a sorry fact of life, and it’s no joking matter to many families. The average weekly shop, because of the Canary Islands’ distance from the mainland, and the price of importing products, costs the average family over 7,000 euros a year. Thanks to a European “Freedom of Movement” directive in 1992, the Canaries had to put their own measures into place, to stop an influx of cheap goods flooding in from overseas, and to place the emphasis on homegrown products. One of the measures was the Excise on Import and Export of Goods (AIEM), which applies to certain goods being brought into the Islands from anywhere in the EU. For instance, beer is brewed in the Canaries but is also imported from the mainland, and, unfortunately, the AIEM tax applies to imported beers.

A second measure is the Economic Supply System (REA), which is, effectively, an aid or subsidy granted towards essential items in the average shopping trolley. But despite any protective measures, the Canary Islands’ shopping trolley still costs more than in any other part of Spain. Andrés Calvo, President of the Canary Islands Manufacturers’ Association (Asinca), argues that not all the shopping-trolley items are subject to AIEM or REA. And, also, that transportation costs remain high in the archipelago. As an example, he said that “internal” freight costs from Fuerteventura to Tenerife are higher than those from Barcelona to Gran Canaria capital Las Palmas, despite the latter being further away. Also, products from other countries outside the EU are exempt from the REA subsidy, which means that certain products (Brazilian beef, say) are more expensive in the Canaries. But should the AIEM exist solely as a tax, or jointly to protect local in-

dustry? There are arguments from both sides of the coin, but what is obvious is that the weekly food shop is more expensive than it should be. A study by website kelisto.es installed the Canaries at the top of its cost-of-shopping list, and it also placed the Islands’ two capital cities among the most expensive in Spain. Bilbao was the most expensive, with shoppers spending an average of 7,250 euros a year on essentials, followed by Las Palmas, (7,200 euros), and fifth-placed Santa Cruz (7,040 euros). A loaf of bread, costing an average of 1.20 euros in Santa Cruz,, is one of the staple items in the shopping trolley, and it is second-highest in Spain after Mallorca, where a loaf is five cents dearer, which puts it 40% above the national average. So, if you really are skint, head for Murcia. The average spend is an annual 6,250 euros on essentials, which is almost 4% less than the average. But could you really be bothered, just to shave a few cents of your weekly bill - never mind the cost of flights?


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Spanish exports peak SPAIN’S economy has received another big boost with the news that for the first three months of the year, exports grew by 3.2% on the same 2013 period to 58.39 billion euros.

It’s another all-time high since records began in 1971, and the rate of export growth from Spain to overseas destinations surpassed the export figures posted in this period by Germany (3.1%), Italy (1.5%), France (-1.1%) and the UK (-5.8%). Exports in both the Eurozone and the European Union grew by 1%. And outside the EU, exports from the US increased by 2.6% from 2013, to a total of 64.89 billion euros. The import increase explains why the trade deficit in the first quarter of 2014 stands at 6.49 billion euros, compared with a deficit of 4.05 billion eu-

ros in the same period the previous year (60.4% higher). The non-energy surplus posted a figure of 4.32 billion euros, while the energy deficit fell by 3.6%

to 10.81 billion euros. In the first quarter of the year, exports to the European Union increased by 7.9% year-on-year (it was -2% in 2013), confirming the budding recovery in

the country. The increase was also reflected in the proportion of intra-EU exports, which accounted for 64.4% of the total in the first three months of this year, compared

with 61.6% the previous year. Exports to non-EU destinations were down by 4.3% year-on-year and now account for 35.6% of the total.

However, there was a notable 14% increase in exports to Asia (except the Middle East), particularly because of increased exports to Japan (+41.7%) and South Korea (+45.5%). Exports to the United States maintained their strong recovery (+15.4%) after the slump in 2013. In terms of contribution to the rate of change in total exports, the main destination for Spanish exports at a global level was Portugal (contributing 1% to the increase registered by total exports in January-March 2014, particularly in the other foods and automotive components sub-sectors). By sector, highly positive results were posted by the automotive sector, where exports grew by 10.1% in the period and accounted for 15.1% of the total. And. in general, all sectors posted export growth except capital goods, which fell by 5.8%, and other goods (by 4.3%).

US welcomes Canaries PAULINO RIVERO, President of the Canary Islands’ Government, has stressed the importance of local businesses extending their boundaries into the United States.

He also says that many companies are “opening doors” across the Atlantic. Rivero, posting in his personal blog, wrote that more than a dozen Canary Island companies had interests in the US. He also said that while Canarian presence is being increased in Africa - thanks to a huge promotional campaign - the same could also be said of the US, and added that progress must continue to be made there. The Canaries Islands are represented abroad in several niche markets: in 2012, major exports included gums,

resins and other vegetable saps, which represented 23.28% of total exports to the US from the Islands. Essential oils accounted for 19.7% of exports, and artwork experienced significant growth, accounting for 15% of all exports to the US. Food and drink com-

panies are also expanding into the US: the Bermejo winery, the Arehucas and San Bartolomé de Tejina distilleries, the Vieja Licorería, Gofio La Peña, Gofio La Molineta and the Grupo Ganadero de Fuerteventura (which makes Maxorata cheeses) are also well represented.


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King Carlos a hit in Saudi THE King of Spain visited Saudi Arabia last weekend within the framework of his tour of countries forming the Gulf Co-operation Council,.

The editor says...

Email: editor@canarianweekly.com

Backing the bull! NO two weeks are ever the same in this job - and stories can just leap out of nowhere.

For example, I was working on a great story at the start of the week, utterly convinced it would be the front page. A major name coming to the Island - a great coup and a good scoup. But the wheels started to fall off! These things happen, and we will give you the full story next issue. Then the phone goes and I am away on another lead. And this one pans out. Fans of CD Tenerife knew they were going to lose star player Ayoze Perez. It was just a case of who to? And I’ll be honest, of all the sides that were looking at him, Newcastle was the last place I thought he would pitch up. But

the source is solid, and the tip stood up. A few calls to the North East of England later and the story wrote itself. It’s nice to chase and get such respect back from other publications. Teamwork always works is the mantra. So a big hat-tip to Mark Douglas, from The Journal. But even then, the wonderkid didn’t make the front page, as you will have seen by now. I’m not the world’s biggest animal lover, well horses aside, but cruelty is cruelty. There are not many things that make me embarrassed to live in Spain. But bullfighting is one of them. It’s 2014, not 1814! And, like dog or cockfighting, it has no place in a grown-up, modern society. Nobody wants to see any human serious injured, but if that’s what it takes to stop this deplorable “sport”, then I’m all for it. Go Bulls!

Tel: 902 232 102 info@canarianweekly.com Publisher, proprietor and Editor: MES ONCE SL Depósito Legal TF 1209/97 CIF: B- 38753802

And it proved to be an enlightened, trip for King Juan Carlos, who was able to strengthen relationships between the two countries with particular emphasis placed on economic ties. He was accompanied on the trip by Minister for Defence Pedro Morenés, Minister for Public Works Ana Pastor and Minister for Industry, Energy and Tourism José Manuel Soria, as well as StateSecretary for Foreign Affairs Gonzalo de Benito, State-Secretary for Trade Jaime GarcíaLegaz, High Commissioner for the “Spain Brand” Carlos Espinosa de los Monteros, other senior members of the government and a large delegation of business leaders. It was the third stage of a tour which has taken the King to another four countries of the Gulf Co-operation

Council: the United Arab Emirates, Kuwait, Oman and Bahrain. King Juan Carlos has been promoting political and cultural ties on all these trips, with special emphasis on bilateral, economic relations. On his visit to Jeddah, the Spanish King met the Crown Prince of Saudi Arabia, Salman bin Abdulaziz Al Saud, and other dignitaries. He tackled various international issues with them, especially political, cultural and economic affairs related to the long-standing unity between Spain and Saudi Arabia. There are already a significant number of

Spanish companies operating there, and a business meeting was held between Spanish and Saudi companies, which was officially brought to a close by the Spanish King. He also entertained more than 60 representatives from Spanish companies based in Saudi Arabia. During the course of these meetings, it was made absolutely clear that Spanish companies are hugely interested in the opportunities offered by development in Saudi Arabia, a country with enormously ambitious infrastructure development plans. Spanish companies are already construct-

ing the Mecca-Medina High-Speed Railway link - the most ambitious Spanish project in the railway sector - and three new metro lines in Riyadh. They are also interested in other important projects in many other sectors. And the Saudi Arabia authorities expressed an interest in the economic recovery taking place in Spain, with a view to increasing their presence there. Besides demonstrating the excellent relations between Spain and Saudi Arabia, a partnership agreement on security and the fight against crime was also signed.

Arona are in shade again FOR the second successive year, Arona’s three main beaches have failed to win the prestigious Blue Flag award. Las Vistas, El Camsion and Los Cristianos beaches fell short of the criteria, which include sanitation, accessibility, facilities and awareness of the environment. The flags are awarded by the Association for the Environment and Consumer Education,

and they are widely regarded as the standard to achieve. Naturally, the lack of Blue Flags has angered local politicians representing the People’s Party (PP) and the So-

cialist Workers Party (PSOE), who blame the Canary Coalition’s “mismanagement,” which saw the lifeguards go unpaid for around a year. And the sunbed fiasco, which has seen Los Cristianos beach bereft of beds for several months, hasn’t helped, either. José Julián Mena, for the PSOE, described the situation as “intolerable,” and pointed out that the Canary

Coalition (CC) has 13 representatives on the council, calling them “irresponsible.” Mena blamed the lack of Blue Flags on ineffective management and a lack of ideas. Dionisio Rocha, PP spokesperson, was also critical of the situation, again drawing attention to the plight of the lifeguards and the issue of sunbeds and umbrellas, blaming the CC’s “inefficiency”.

Avda. Claudio Delgado Diaz 99, Edf. Ayllon Local 2C, Pol. Ind. Las Chafiras, 38639 San Miguel De Abona, Tenerife PRINTED BY: TF Print S.A.

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Contributors: Adi Benson, Carl Pattison, Emma Swain, Geoff Huxtable, Jamie Drew, Mariano Zunino Siri, Margaret Tully, Ruth Benson, Sue McDonald, Val Sainsbury Canarian Weekly takes all reasonable care to check the contents of every advertisement, but cannot accept responsibility for the claims or statements made in them. Also, statements or opinions expressed by contributors do not necessarily reflect those of the Editor or Publishers. Material featured in Canarian Weekly may not be reproduced without the explicit written permission of the Editor. Copyright © 2014 Canarian Weekly


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Longthorne facing new cancer battle JOE LONGTHORNE, one of the finest entertainers ever to grace these shores, has the most daunting challenge of his life.

The incredible singing star, who can be Shirley Bassey one minute, and Tom Jones the next, is facing a second battle with cancer. The 58-year-old star was initially diagnosed with leukaemia, a condition he eventually beat, and next week he will start treatment to fight throat cancer. Joe, a regular visitor to Tenerife, has performed a number of special gigs at Showtime, Las Americas, in the last few years. Apart from being a fabulous singing impressionist, he is a great fighter - and a devout Catholic - and vows to beat the disease. He told the Blackpool Gazette, his local newspaper: “I was completely and utterly shocked at being given the news about having to have treatment for throat cancer. “However, I am 100% positive. I’ve been here before, so here we go round two coming up. You have two choices on being given news like this; you can stay down or get up and fight. “I’ve always chosen to fight, and fight on I will. I’ve beaten it before and will do so again.”

Joe has over 70 shows booked before the end of this year and hopes to perform as many as possible. He has held preliminary talks with ITV about an hour-long An Audience With special, and he has just started recording a brand-new album. On top of that, plans are already in place for

a special 60th birthday show for him next May at the London Palladium. Despite the news, Joe, always cool and calm, said: “There are always people much worse off than yourself, so it’s important to keep focused at this time. “I have the most wonderful family one could ever have, some very

dear friends and the best fans anyone could ever wish for. “I have had their love and total support all through my life and they have, and always will be, there for me. “I would like to say to my fans at this time to think of my charities and give their support if they can. After receiving the MBE in 2012, I have

given much more time and attention to helping others and I would like to ask my fans to do this, too, and they will be helping me on the way. “We are like one big family these days, as I like it. I am a Catholic and have my faith and deep belief in Jesus Christ. He has seen me through before, and He will be there for me this time.” Joe’s manager and partner, Jamie Moran, said: “Joe found a lump in his throat and went to the doctor. He had some tests done, including a biopsy. He had leukaemia and underwent a bone-marrow transplant, so he knows what to expect from the treatment. “He has beaten it once, so he can do it again. He will be starting the treatment n June, so he will be performing all the shows until then. “After that, he will be taking it day by day. If the treatment allows and he feels well enough, he will perform.” The singer faces surgery and then radiotherapy in an attempt to reduce the cancer. He has performed some memorable shows in Tenerife, the most recent one in January at Showtime. Oasis Fm Dj Jamie Droo said: “It was a superb show and Joe was his usual, magnificent self. I’m sure he will beat this and be back performing here very

soon.” On his Facebook, entertainer Stefan Dee said: “If anyone working the cabaret/entertainment scene ever gets the chance to see Joe’s DVD If I Never Sing Another Song, which is all about the last battle he had with this terrible disease, you will realise what a commitment to his millions of fans and the entertainment scene he gives.” He added: “I am praying for you Joe. Onwards and upwards with the battle, my friend. Hope to see you soon, Singing Many Many More Songs.” Joe’s agent, wellknown showbiz personality Eric Hall, said: “I have been a friend of Joe’s for more than 20 years and he is a great man, a lovely man. I have worked with the likes of the Beatles, Queen, Cliff Richard and even the Sex Pistols. “But in my opinion, Joe Longthorne is the best male vocalist we have in the country today. “He has beaten cancer before and he can beat it again - and we will do everything to support him until he is better.” Joe was diagnosed with lymphoma at the end sf the Eighties, and it then developed into leukaemia. But he had a bonemarrow transplant in 2006 and made a full recovery. Now, the battle starts again!


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Sunbeds are back on Los Cristianos beach

GOOD news for beach-goers. The sunbeds and umbrellas are back on Los Cristianos beach, after an absence of almost a year.

The welcome news was announced by local councillor Antonio Sosa, and the beds started to arrive on Monday. They should be in place very soon, pending the signing of the agreement between Arona Town Hall and the company which now has the provision contract. The deal was agreed just over a month ago, and should put an end to the frustrating lack of beds and umbrellas, which has been ongoing since last July.

The proposal was backed by the Canary Coalition (CC), the People’s Party (PP) and the Arona Centre for Arona Citizens, but the Socialist Workers’ Party (PSOE) abstained. The contract, according to Sosa, will see 300 beds and 150 umbrellas arrive, and will be run as a joint venture between Juan León Correa and Celedonia León Correa. As no other companies entered bids for the contract in the 15-day period after Correa and Correa expressed their interest, contracts can be signed and authorised. The cost for a sunbed is expected to be set at three euros per day, and the renewable contract has an initial duration of four years.

Bosnian army chief under THE defence in the trial of former Bosnian Serb army chief Ratko Mladic on charges of genocide and crimes against humanity has opened in The Hague.

The first witness, a former Serb army officer, says he was never ordered to fire on civilians in the besieged

Bosnian capital of Sarajevo. Mladic, one of the most high-profile suspects to appear before the tribunal in The Hague, denies 11 charges dating to the 1992-95 Bosnian war. Mile Sladoje, a former assistant commander of a Serb battalion in Sarajevo, was the first witness called by 72-year-old Mladic on Monday. In a summary of his

testimony read at the hearing, he denies ever being ordered by Mladic to target civilians in a sniping campaign during the three-year siege of the city, in which around 10,000 people were killed - most of them Muslims. “All our activities in Sarajevo were defence activities,” he said. “There were standing orders - fire could only be returned in re-

sponse to enemy fire. I know nobody gave orders to shoot civilians.” Ratko Mladic is famous for his animated appearances. As the judge entered courtroom one, the ageing patriot stood, bowed his head and gave a slow salute. He then placed both hands on his heart and closed his eyes, followed by a quick glance through the bullet-proof glass. Two decades ago, he


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Drink up it’s tanfastic!

YOU will probably find this difficult to swallow, but you can now drink yourself safe from sunburn.

Many of you, especially over here, will have had a few drinks, fallen asleep on the beach and woken up with red-raw skin. And that keeps you indoors for a few days. Now, though, Harmonised H20 UV claims to provide holiday-makers with up to factor 30 protection, meaning sunbathers could be able to soak up the rays for longer without fear of getting burned. Once ingested, the product’s liquid molecules vibrate on the skin, cancelling out

97% of UVA and UVB rays, according to US company Osmosis Skincare. The liquid sunscreen, which claims to be the world’s first, is on sale now for £17. There are two varieties - “tanning” and “non tanning”. The former enables users to get tanned, with protection from harmful sun rays. On its website, the medical skincare brand advises: *Take 2ml every four hours while in the sun (preferably with about two ounces of water) *Wait one hour before exposure to the sun. Monitor sun exposure carefully *Take second dose if still in sun three hours after first dos. *For extended, intense exercise outdoors, or if taking sun-sensitising medications, use alter-

nate protection after 3040 minutes Dr Ben Johnson, who founded the company, adds in his blog: “If 2mls are ingested an hour before sun exposure, the frequencies that have been imprinted on water will vibrate on your skin in such a way as to cancel approximately 97% of the UVA and UVB rays before they even hit your skin. “This results in coverage for approximately three hours. This is similar to the amount of UV reflection created by SPF 30 titanium/ zinc sunblocks, but distinctly better than UVB chemical sunscreens, which prevent certain damage that leads to the visible/painful/inflammation reaction we identify as sun damage.” And if you can understand all that …

r fire in court was a general, parading the battlefield in army fatigues. Now, he struggles to stand - and grasps a thick, plasticcoated pen to make notes, his muscles still suffering from the effect of several strokes. But his character remains intact. As Mile Sladoje told the court that their battalion did not have the “opticalsight” rifles the prosecution claims were used by Serb snipers in

Sarajevo, Mladic nodded in earnest agreement. A few months ago, Mladic forgot his false teeth, and the trial was temporarily adjourned. With at least two years to go, survivors hope his health does not deteriorate further. Mladic’s forces are accused of conducting a prolonged campaign of shelling and sniping, designed to kill and spread terror among

Sarajevo civilians. And he is specifically accused of a role in the massacre of more than 7,000 Bosniak men and boys at Srebrenica – Europe’s worst atrocity since World War II. The defence argues that Gen Mladic was simply a soldier following orders, and his lawyers have described him as a selfproclaimed patriot who fought to defend his people.

11 CW


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Floods may swamp up to 10,000 people ON an island noted for its generally dry weather, it’s hard to imagine that as many as 10,000 residents are at risk of flooding when the rains fall heavily.

Primark’s Spanish celebrations This week Primark celebrated their 8th anniversary with the opening of their first megastore in Spain. The new store is in the Plenilunio Shopping centre near to the airport in Madrid. It has over 5,400 square metres of space, nearly 200 staff and is double the size of the original store opened in Plenilunio in 2006.

The new flagship Madrid shop is the 6th in the capital making Primark the number one textile company in the area. Primark’s commitment to Spain sees them now employing more than 6.000 workers within their 39 shops in Spain and they will be adding new stores in new cities over the next 18 months.

Yet that seems to be the case, according to Jesús Morales, the Cabildo’s Water Councillor, who highlighted eight specific areas during a press conference on Monday. The places most prone to flooding are generally where there are dry valleys, known as barrancos, and Morales identified those having “significant potential risk”. They are: Bufadero, el Hierro (in Santa Cruz), Santos, El Hierro, La Carnicería, San Felipe, San Juan, and Infierno and Torviscas (counted as one). These areas cover around 20.4 square kilometres and

are home to over 10,000 inhabitants. Data was collected according to the quantity of overflowing water in the valley beds, as well as the speed of the flood water. The estimated cost of flood damage reaches several million euros. Over a period of many years, the barranco el Hierro, in Santa Cruz, is expected to cause dam-

age costing around 38 million euros, by far the most costly because of its position in the centre of the Island’s capital. In some areas, there are buildings of cultural, historical and religious interest. For example, the former convent of Santo Domingo, the home of Padre Ancheita and the church of La Concepción in Santa Cruz and the San Felipe

Castle in Puerto de la Cruz. A hazard map being drawn up is expected to be approved and published by December 2015. Once completed, flood management plans will be put into place and these will, hopefully, coordinate all available resources to reduce the impact of future flooding.


CW 14

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Our caring, sharing authorities AN agreement between the Canaries Government and Tenerife Cabildo to provide funding of almost 38 million euros was reached this week.

It will go towards caring for thousands of elderly people, and many others with disabilities. The meeting was at-

tended by Paulino Rivero, President of the Canary Islands’ Government, along with Cabildo President Carlos Alonso and representatives of the Regional Ministry for Social Affairs and the Ministry of Social Welfare. The total granted is over one million euros more than was set aside last year. The regional government will provide 24.5 million euros, and the

Cabildo will stump up the remaining 13.4 million. The funding will directly aid 3,230 people, who qualify for assistance - up by 24 from last year. Rivero said that despite cuts in state funding for social policies, the Canary Islands have “continued to commit to the public”. He also confirmed that the new hospital for the South Tenerife will open “by early 2015”.

Euro funding feeding 18,000 in Santa Cruz THE various food banks in Santa Cruz have been feeding as many as 18,000 people on a regular basis - thanks to various associations, many with European backing.

The Food Bank and the Red Cross are the two main organisations involved, and they both receive food

from the Spanish Agricultural Guarantee Fund (FEGA), which receives money from the EU to put towards purchasing items for those in Teide Bank distributes food in Santa Cruz, and, with help from other organisations, its work has benefited over 13,000 residents since its launch in February. The Red Cross has reached in excess of 3,200 people directly, and a further 2,500,

via collaboration with the Non Governmental Organisation Sonrisas Canarias (Canarian Smiles). The number of people needing help has increased in the last year, with the Red Cross, for example, providing food for almost 1,000 more people than at this stage last year. The growing number of families in need is causing much concern, especially considering that 2,000 of the 13,000 aided by the Teide

Bank are children, and over 650 are infants. FEGA funding has also been granted to other organisations. Kairos reports having assisted almost 1,800 people with such funds, of the 2,800 it has helped up to April. It has also undertaken to collect milk and biscuits, because the milk funding for milk has been reduced. And in the last delivery here were no biscuits, leaving many youngsters

without their favourite snack. Breaking records for supplying food to those in need may not be something to shout about, given how many people are living below the poverty line. But on 29th April, more than 2,000 people were given food -record total. And that does provide food for thought! Last year’s EU budget for food supply, via FEGA, stood at 85 million euros, and the third phase alone saw

the distribution of 80 million kilos of food to the needy. Overall, 50,000 Santa Cruz people have benefited from FEGA-funded supplies, amounting to over two million kilos of food. The products most often provided are rice, UHT milk, cheese, flour, biscuits (despite the no-show in the third phase), unsweetened canned fruit, canned tomato sauce, lentils, chick-peas, baby food and infant cereals.


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Surprise, Surprise, it’s Cilla! TELEVISION’S biggest stars gathered for the TV Bafta awards in London on Sunday. And, surprise, surprise, it thrust Cilla Black back into the limelight!

Cilla, a Sixties icon who had a string of top-10 hits and was great pals with The Beatles, also became a leading TV light with Blind Date and Surprise, Surprise. Entertainer Paul O’Grady the former drag artiste Lily Savage and a fellow Scouser presented the Special Award to Cilla for her unique contribution to entertainment over 50 years. Cilla, who will be 71 on Tuesday, said: “Thank you to the viewers for making me feel so welcome. I’ve loved my shows all over the years - this is for you.” Olivia Colman won her third Bafta in two years after picking up the leading actress award

for Broadchurch. The ITV drama, about the death of an 11-yearold boy and the search

for his murderer, was the night’s big winner with three Baftas. Broadchurch was rec-

ognised in three categories: Supporting Actor (David Bradley), Drama Series and Lead-

ing Actress. Olivia, who won Baftas last year for her performances in Accused and Twenty Twelve, was so overwhelmed that she gave an almost incomprehensible acceptance speech and then said: “I’m so pleased everyone likes it.” Channel 4 comedy The IT Crowd turned two of its four nominations into wins, with Richard Ayoade and Katherine Parkinson collecting their first Baftas for male and female performance in a comedy programme. It was also a successful night for Ant and Dec, their ITV show Saturday Night Takeaway winning the Entertainment Performance and Entertainment Programme categories. Sky Sports was recognised for its Ashes coverage, Sky One for comedy panel show A League Of Their Own, and Sky 3D for Sir David Attenborough’s Natural History Museum Alive. Sir David’s win in the specialist factual category makes him the first person to have won

Baftas for programmes in black and white, colour, 3D, and HD. Sean Harris won the leading actor Bafta for his role as Stephen Morton in Channel 4’s Southcliffe. The first-time nominee beat some big names to the prize, including Jamie Dornan (The Fall) and Dominic West (Burton and Taylor, BBC Four). Former Corrie star Sarah Lancashire won the award for Supporting Actress in BBC One’s Last Tango in Halifax drama, her second nomination in as many years for the role. The Radio Times Audience Award - the only one voted for by the public - went to Doctor Who. Coronation Street added a 10th Bafta to its collection by beating Casualty, Eastenders and Holby City to the Soap and Continuing Drama award. The Bafta Fellowship award was given to seven-time winner Julie Walters in recognition of her 30-year contribution to television.


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17 CW

The Sun shines on Middle East A SURVEY by Travelzoo.com suggests that the Canaries will face increasing competition from destinations such as Dubai in the next few years.

The survey admits the Canary Islands are still a favourite winter getaway for 51.6% of Germans, 48% of Brits, 42% of Spaniards, and 29% of French holidaymakers. However, the Middle East is rapidly gaining ground, it says. The main attractions there are the culture, warm temperatures, suitable for sun and beach holidays, plus the option of taking desert safaris and excursions. Thanks to these attractions, 35% of Spaniards surveyed said they would be interested in travelling to the Middle East in the next 18 months. The one hitch is that

many Spanish tour operators do not offer these destinations or packages readily, so it is difficult to access such holidays -as 76% of the group agreed. Travelzoo European chief Richard Singer spoke of the survey’s findings at the Arabian Travel Market in Dubai, stressing that travel agencies should start to take advantage of the results, and open up opportunities for Middle Eastern tourism. The survey also concluded that the factors working against choosing the Middle East as a holiday destination include the political situation, the cost, and, in the case of the British respondents, a lack of attractiveness. Finally, 80% of women said that they would have to change their dress if they were to visit the area - a problem which is hardly evident in the Canaries!

Pamela’s tale of woe PAMELA ANDERSON, the former Baywatch star, has revealed that she was sexually assaulted by a female babysitter - and gangraped as a child.

At the launch of her new conservation foundation during the Cannes Film Festival, she described a number of traumatic experiences in her youth, including being “molested” by the baby-sitter from the age of six. And the 46-year-old beauty said she was raped by a 25-year-old when she was just 12. She also recalled how her first boyfriend, when she was “15 or 16” - decided it would be “funny to gang-rape me with six of his friends”.

The Canadian told guests at the beach event on the French Riviera that the events explained partly how she came to love animals so much. She said she “just wanted off this earth” and formed an “affinity” with animals. Pamela, who has always campaigned for animal welfare, added: “My parents tried to keep me safe, but to me the world was not a safe place. My dad an alcoholic and my mum had two jobs waitressing.” She said she did not tell her mother what she went through because she didn’t want to break her heart. “My affinity with animals saved me,” she said. “They came to me naturally. The trees spoke to me and I wasn’t sure why I was

alive. “My loyalty remained with the animal kingdom. I vowed to protect them and only them. I prayed to the whales with my feet in the ocean - my only real friends until I had children.” Anderson is married to Rick Saloman and has two sons with her former husband, Tommy Lee. The activist said she realised early on in her career that her place in the spotlight provided her with a voice. “We have changed animal welfare laws all over the world and, over the last 20 years, I have spoken to parliament, kings, queens.,” she stressed. “I’ve had the ear and admiration of people like Castro and, crazy enough, Putin. There must be a way to use this for good.”


CW 18

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Britain’s blooming brilliant blossoms! THE Chelsea Flower Show, one of the country’s great annual attractions, had the royal seal of approval on Monday when The Queen looked in.

It is always a wonderful pageant of colour and this year, some exhibitors chose to mark the centenary of World War One. One garden represents a landscape from northern France, complete with trenches and a mine crater filled with water. Others are themed on the growth of community gardens, and how horticulture can help unemployed people find work. Alan Titchmarsh, now a TV celebrity with his own chat show, and still the official BBC gardener, has co-designed a garden with Kate Gould to celebrate 50 years of the Britain in Bloom campaign. When asked if he had any last-minute changes to make to the display, From the Moors to the Sea, he said quite firmly: “No, no, no. Were all done - it’s all settling now. Everything’s sitting up and we are very happy.” The garden includes a dry stone wall, which was dismantled from its original site in Yorkshire and reassembled in Chelsea. It also has a beach hut, designed with a scene in mind from the Isle of Wight, where Titchmarsh now lives. The Queen was at the show, based in Chelsea’s Royal Hospital as usual, ahead of Tuesday’s opening to the public. And the over-riding message from this year’s show to teenagers and twenty-somethings looking for a mission in life is: “Britain’s gardens need you!” Sue Biggs, of the RHS, says too many people still believe that only “academic failures” turn to gardening.

And she has a point. Among those making waves in Chelsea are young designers like brothers Harry and David Rich, with their Night Sky garden, and 26-year old Hugo Bugg, whose Waterscape Garden gives timely advice about how to plant wisely to absorb the run-off from storms and from floods. He has designed a Waterscape Garden, sub-titled Embrace the Rain, which is intended to illustrate global water issues and demonstrate practical solutions for home gardeners and commercial landscapes. Then there’s the No Man’s Land garden, designed by Charlotte Rowe, who took her inspiration from images of the 1st World War. Charlotte has focused on the landscape of the Western Front in France, and she has put together a modern representation of the area, showing how the natural environment

has regenerated. She explained: “My grandfather, with whom I was very close, went over the top aged 19 on the first day of the Battle of the Somme. “The idea behind it is that the land, No Man’s Land, was fought over again and again, with the front line moving

very little - and the land got completely messed up and churned up. “The concept is the healing of the land after severe conflict, and relating it to the human body and spirit.” Plants in the garden were grown by injured soldiers during a pro-

gramme of horticultural therapy. Another exhibit, celebrating Britain in Bloom, is a garden, made from recycled or donated materials, which was designed by renowned gardener Jon Wheatley and put together by unpaid volunteers.

A display called Reachout suggests that horticulture can improve the lives of young people struggling with drug-addiction or unemployment, by providing them with work and inspiration. The Techno Allotment, by Leeds District Allotment Gardeners’ Federation, highlights how communities can grow their own food cheaply and stylishly. The show’s organisers are also raising funds through their charitable arm to create more jobs over the next five years at Royal Horticultural Society (RHS) gardens in Wisley, Surrey; Harlow Carr, North Yorkshire; Hyde Hall, Essex; and Rosemoor in Devon. Sue Biggs, RHS director general, said: “Horticulture is a vibrant, challenging and diverse industry, with great job prospects. “Career paths include botanist, nursery staff, designer, florist, horticulturist, plant-collector, landscape architect, entrepreneur, journalist, TV presenter and many more. “We also know that more than 80% of secondary-school teachers who discussed careers with their pupils said that they themselves were not aware of the vast opportunities offered by a career in horticulture.”

Not short of a few bob! IT’S just not enough to be among the 1,000 richest people in Britain - their incredible wealth rose by 15% last year to a mindboggling £519bn.

Despite many people’s wages falling in real terms, The Sunday Times’ annual Rich List suggests that the wealthiest Britons now own the equivalent of a third of the country’s gross domestic product (GDP).

As well as the familiar names of Sir Richard Branson, Roman Abramovich and Sir Philip Green, the 2014 list features several new entrants. They include Riccardo Zacconi, chief executive of King Digital Entertainment, and three other staff at the company behind the hugely popular Candy Crush Saga game. Former Tesco boss Sir Terry Leahy and brothers Dan and Sam Houser, who masterminded the Grand Theft Auto franchise, also join the top 1,000.

Philip Beresford, who has compiled the Rich List since 1989, said: “I’ve never seen such a phenomenal rise in personal wealth as the growth in the fortunes of Britain’s 1,000 richest people over the past year. “The richest people in Britain have had an astonishing year. While some may criticise them, many of these people are at the heart of the economy, and their success brings more jobs and more wealth for the country.” This year’s Rich List

features 114 women down four from 2013 but up 36 on a decade ago. They include Tamara Mellon, who co-founded the Jimmy Choo shoes brand, and Harry Potter author JK Rowling. The majority live in London, with 438 of the richest 1,000 - collectively worth £331bn - claiming to be based there. By contrast, the North East has the fewest, with 20 in total, worth a combined £8.6bn. Nice work, if you can get it!


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Money Matters

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

Take expert advice when buying an overseas home

By Jana Korpova

THE arrival of spring kick-starts activity in the housing market every year, especially in popular holiday-home destinations such as Spain.

If you’re keen to bag yourself a second home in Tenerife, or another sunny location, now is the time to start thinking about booking that all-important viewing trip. Before you start, though, think about exactly where you want to live and have a browse through the top-10 considerations to address when purchasing property abroad: 1. Air access: When researching your preferred destinations or area, check flight options and seasonality of routes. Relying on one budget airline and having just one choice of airport to get you to your property is not advisable. 2. Tax office registration: To purchase property anywhere, you’ll need to register with the local tax office and receive a tax identification number, which is required for the completion of any formal state process or transaction, including opening a bank account. In Spain this is known as your NIE number and is issued by the General Directorate of Police. It must be used on all tax returns and communications addressed to the tax authorities. You CANNOT buy property in Spain without an NIE. 3. Independent legal representation: A notary is required by Spanish law to oversee and rubber-stamp a property transaction. Notaries represent the State, and you will pay a small fee for their services. Don’t confuse them with lawyers. You will also need to employ an independent, Englishspeaking lawyer to represent your own interests.

He or she will be able to guide you through the details of the transaction, so that you fully understand the contract and supporting documentation. 4. Transferring your money abroad: At many stages in the purchasing process, and particularly when you are buying the property itself, you will probably need to send money from your sterling bank account in the UK to a Spanish euro account. Never ask your high street bank to do this! You’ll get a far better exchange rate, as well as a speedier and superior service, from an FCA-authorised currency specialist like Smart Currency Exchange. The company consistently offers exchange rates 2-4% better than those available from a high street bank. When you apply this saving to the typical value of a Spanish property purchase, you could easily save thousands of pounds. In real terms, it means exchanging and sending 150,000 euros from the UK to Spain should cost around £3,000 less when using a currency specialist. The other clever thing currency specialists do is enable clients to secure an exchange rate for a future transfer. It’s a worthwhile facil-

ity after having an offer accepted on a Spanish property because it will stop the sterling price changing with the exchange rate before completion day. For example when you’re ready to send money to Spain, you simply call your account manager at Smart Currency Exchange and agree a competitive exchange rate. The sterling you transfer is sent to its segregated client account, and then on to the overseas beneficiary account details you have provided. And that takes no more than 48 hours, rather than the 4-5 working days taken by the bank. 5. Your estate agent: A good English-speaking estate agent can be gold-dust, and will assist with much more than just showing you properties. It’s often said that once you know where you want to buy, the best place to start is by finding the right estate agent, rather than the right property. 6. Buying costs and taxes: The costs involved in purchasing a property in Spain will vary, depending on whether you are buying a resale property or a new-build (so, from a developer and never previously occupied), in addition to the pur-

chase price. When you budget for your property, be sure to factor in these inevitable costs. As a general rule, you should allow 10-12% on top of the purchase price to cover all taxes and fees. When buying a resale property, most of your costs will go towards transfer tax (ITP), which varies by region but is generally around 7%. You will also need to pay notary fees (fixed on a sliding scale), Land Registry fees and your independent lawyer’s fees. If you are buying with a mortgage, you will also have to pay for a valuation, stamp duty of 1.5% and a lender’s commission (usually 1% of the capital loan). If buying a new-build property, which means it comes with a Licence of First Occupation, no transfer tax is payable, but VAT (IVA) is levied at 10% of purchase price. Stamp duty is also applicable with a new-build. 7. On-going costs and taxes: Wherever you purchase a property, there will be additional, on-going ownership costs, which could include local council taxes, community fees (if on an urbanisation or complex), usual bills and maintenance - and possibly a small fee for

filing a tax return, if applicable. Again, for the best exchange rates to pay for these, an authorised currency specialist is essential if sending money from the UK. 8. Mortgage or outright purchase: It might be worth your while opting for a loan in Europe. Spanish banks desperate to off-load repossessed homes are currently offering some great finance deals, including some with guaranteed rental income. 9. Inheritance: Speak to your lawyer about inheritance before purchasing your property. He/she might be able to structure ownership in a way that reduces inheritance tax exposure, or ensures your property is passed on specifically according to your wishes. Remember, laws are different in Spain than they are in the UK. You may need to make a local will in the country of your second home. 10. Moving in: Once you have purchased your property, the next thing to consider is moving your life over to Spain - for good! A reputable removals company is high on the order of importance, and it’s vital to go with one which is insured and, ideally, a member of the British Association of Removers Over-

seas or the Association of International Removers. You will need to check out its insurance status, and what its policies cover. The best time to contact a removals company is three to six months before the removal date. Staff will need to visit your home to survey your possessions and give you a quote. A reputable company will always pack your goods professionally, and ensure you are able to comply with all regulations when moving them to Spain. It will provide you with a specific list of what you can and cannot take into the country, in addition to those appliances you will be able to continue using. If you are not moving straight into your home, some removals companies may also provide storage for your items. Jana Korpova is Head of Business Development at Smart Currency Exchange, a leading FCA-authorised currency transfer firm which specialises in helping overseas home-owners and expats send money between their UK and foreign currency accounts, offering better exchange rates than banks and a secure, fast service. www.smartcurrencyexchange.com, +(44) 207 898 0541


www.canarianweekly.com 23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

TV

21 CW

Guide

The British Soap Awards 2014

Don't Miss...

Sunday 25th May 2014, ITV1, 20.15

Hosted by Phillip Schofield from London’s Hackney Empire, The British Soap Awards 2014 promises to be the most exciting and glamorous awards night in the showbiz calendar. Each year Britain’s soaps make us laugh, cry and gasp in equal measure but above all they keep us on the edge of our seats, week in, week out. The British Soap Awards honours the very best work in our most popular television shows. Coronation Street, Doctors, EastEnders, Emmerdale and Hollyoaks all go head to head to find out who will be going home with a hotly contested Soap Award. As ever, the trophies are presented by some of the entertainment world’s brightest and most famous faces. Find out who you have voted as your Villain of the Year; who has been getting you hot under the collar as we discover the winners of Sexiest Male and Female; and who will be receiving this year’s prestigious Outstanding Achievement award. Other coveted awards handed out on the night include Best Actor, Best Actress, Best Dramatic Performance, Best Comedy Performance, Best Newcomer, Spectacular Scene of the Year, Best Storyline, Best Single Episode and the big one, Best British Soap.


CW 22

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TV Guide

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

Friday

Friday

Frid

09:15....................... Fake Britain

06:05................. Homes Under the Hammer

06:00................. Good Morning Britain

10:00 ................... Homes Under the Hammer

07:05.............................. Caught Red Handed

08:30.............................. Lorraine

11:00..... Caught Red Handed

07:35 .............Call the Council

09:25 ........................ The Jeremy Kyle Show

11:30............... Call the Council

08:20........... Countryside 999

10:30.................... This Morning

12:15.................... Bargain Hunt

09:05.......................... The Great Interior Design Challenge

11:25 ............................ITV News

06:00............................ Breakfast

13:00........... BBC News at One 13:45 .............................. Doctors 14:15 ............................. The Link 15:00 ......................RHS Chelsea Flower Show

10:05 .........Mary Berry Cooks 10:35 ........... The Travel Show 11:00 ........................BBC News

15:45 ............................Escape to the Country

11:30 ...........BBC World News

16:30 ........ Antiques Road Trip 17:15 ............................ Pointless

13:00.................... Great British Garden Revival

18:00......... BBC News at Six

14:00 ........................Vote 2014

12:00 ........................Vote 2014

18:30..... BBC London News

18:00................. Eggheads

19:00 ...........The One Show

18:30................... Celebrity Antiques Road Trip

19:30 ...............RHS Chelsea Flower Show 20:00.....Food Inspectors

CW

choice

21:00................... Have I Got News for You 21:30 .................. Room 101 22:00........ BBC News at Ten 22:25 .... BBC London News 22:40................ The Graham Norton Show 23:25...........................Uncle 23:55... EastEnders Omnibus

12:30.................. Loose Women 13:30............................. ITV News and Weather 14:00 ................................Jo Frost Family Matters 15:00 .........................Dickinson’s Real Deal 16:00 .......................Ejector Seat 17:00 ..............................The Paul O’Grady Show 18:00..................... ITV News London

19:30 .........................Great British Menu

18:30............. ITV News and Weather

20:00 ............. RHS Chelsea Flower Show

19:00 ................ Emmerdale 19:30 ..... Coronation Street

21:00 ..............The Story of Women and Art

20:00 ...................... Tonight

22:00 .................... The Fast Show Special

21:00 .......................... Lewis

22:30 ............... Newsnight 23:05 .............. Later... with Jools Holland

Food Inspectors BBC1, 20:00

11:30.................... This Morning

20:30 ..... Coronation Street 22:00 ................ ITV News at Ten and Weather 22:35 ........Die Another Day

W C choice

Matt Allwright, Chris Hollins and Gaby Roslin present a series investigating food hygiene. After ‘Horsegate’, Matt Allwright looks at the impact of the scandal and asks where the next big food scandal may be coming from. He speaks to Professor Chris Elliott, who was commissioned by the government to investigate the horsemeat scandal and thinks the fish industry needs closer attention. Chris and Gaby put yoghurt drinks with added bacteria under the microscope. What is really in them? Gaby tries them out on a Zumba class. Oxford inspectors Richard and Rachel visit a brand new café which is hoping for a high food safety rating. Finally, Chris meets the couple who held their wedding reception in a four star country hotel. The couple and a large number of their guests fell violently ill a few days after the wedding.


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TV Guide

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

day

Friday

Friday

23rd

May 06:00 ........................... Switched 06:25 ..................................90210 07:10 ......................... Ugly Betty 08:00 ........................... Charmed 09:00 .............Made in Chelsea 10:00............................. New Girl 10:30 ................Happy Endings 11:00 ........................... Charmed 12:00 ... Rules of Engagement 12:30 ...........................Hollyoaks 13:00 .......................... How I Met Your Mother 14:00 .....The Big Bang Theory 15:00 ... Rules of Engagement 16:00 .............................New Girl 16:30 ................Happy Endings 17:00.......................... How I Met Your Mother 18:00........................ The Big Bang Theory 19:00 .................. Hollyoaks 19:30 ...................How I Met Your Mother 20:30........................ The Big Bang Theory 21:00........... Remember Me

06:00 ...................... Countdown

06:00..................... Children’s TV

06:00 ........................Emmerdale

06:10 ...................Total Wipeout

06:45 ............ According to Jim

08:15.......................... Peppa Pig

06:25................ Holiday Airport

07:00 .....MasterChef Australia

07:10.... 3rd Rock from the Sun

07:25..... You’ve Been Framed!

08:00 .......... Beverly Hills Pawn

07:35 ............... King of Queens

08:35.................................. Toby’s Travelling Circus

07:45 ........................ The Jeremy Kyle Show USA

09:00................................ The Bill

08:00............. Everybody Loves Raymond

08:45....... Bananas in Pyjamas 09:00........................ Tickety Toc

08:30...................... Dinner Date

09:00 .................................Frasier

09:15.............. The Wright Stuff

11:00 ........................ The Glades

10:00... Undercover Boss USA

11:40 .........Police Interceptors

09:30 ..... The Real Housewives of Orange County

12:00............................Babylon 5

11:00 ...... Come Dine with Me

12:40 ............ Cowboy Builders

12:05 ...... Come Dine with Me

13:40 .........5 News Lunchtime

10:30 ..... The Real Housewives of Vancouver

13:30 ................... Bondi Rescue

13:40 ...........French Collection

13:45...................... Neighbours

14:40 ...................... Countdown

14:15.......... NCIS: Los Angeles

15:30 ...............Deal or No Deal

15:15................. The Obsession

16:30 ...............................Draw it!

17:00 .......................5 News at 5

17:00...............Four in a Bed

17:30...................... Neighbours

CW

choice

11:30 ..................The Millionaire Matchmaker 12:30........................ Emmerdale 13:00............................ The Cube 14:00.................. The Millionaire Matchmaker

17:30...... Come Dine with Me

18:00............. Freaky Eaters

18:00............ The Simpsons

18:30.......... 5 News Tonight

15:00 ........................ The Jeremy Kyle Show

18:30 .................. Hollyoaks

19:00........... Murdered: The Bodies in the Bog

17:10..... The Real Housewives of Vancouver

20:00........... Eddie Stobart’s Excellent Adventures

18:00 ............... Dinner Date

21:00 ........................... NCIS

20:00... Two and a Half Men

19:00 ........ Channel 4 News 19:35 .... Unreported World 20:00 .........Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.

19:00. You’ve Been Framed!

10:00................................ The Bill

13:00 ................... Bondi Rescue 14:00 ........ Extreme Makeover: Home Edition 15:00.............. Neighbourhood Blues 16:00 .............. Neighbourhood Blues 17:00........................... Babylon 5 18:00..............Bondi Rescue 18:30 .............Bondi Rescue 19:00 .... Beverly Hills Pawn 19:30 .... Beverly Hills Pawn 20:00 ....................... Believe 21:00 ................. Perception

21:00................. Gogglebox

22:00..... NCIS: Los Angeles

22:00................... Alan Carr: Chatty Man

22:55 ........... Bangkok Brits

21:00.......... The Shawshank Redemption

23:55........................ Access

23:50 .............. Take Me Out

23:00....... Striking Distance

06:00....... Don’t Stop Me Now

06:00............. Motorway Patrol

07:10............................. Top Gear

06:00 .............Thirtysomething

07:00............. Stargate Atlantis

06:30 .............Motorway Patrol

09:00 ....................... Traffic Cops

07:00....................... Blue Bloods

08:00 ........................... Futurama

07:00........ Nothing to Declare

10:00..............................Top Gear

08:00 .......Star Trek: Enterprise

08:30 ........................... Futurama

07:30........ Nothing to Declare

12:00......... Would I Lie to You?

09:00 ............... Without a Trace

10:00 ....................Hawaii Five-0

08:00 .. RSPCA Animal Rescue

12:40 .......................................... QI

10:00....................... Blue Bloods

11:00 ....................Hawaii Five-0

09:00 ..............UK Border Force

13:20 ................... Only Connect

11:00 ................... Stargate SG-1

13:00 ...........NCIS: Los Angeles

10:00 ........... Sun, Sea and A&E

14:00....................... Traffic Cops

12:00................ Without a Trace

15:00 ............. Stargate Atlantis

11:00............ My Kitchen Rules

15:00 .............................Top Gear

13:00...................................House

16:00 ........................... Futurama

12:00 ............. CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

16:00 .............................Top Gear

15:00 .......Star Trek: Enterprise

14:00 ................Criminal Minds

17:40 .......................................... QI

16:00 ............My Kitchen Rules

18:20............. Only Connect

17:00.. RSPCA Animal Rescue 18:00 ... Nothing to Declare

19:00 ........England’s Top 19 Footy Heroes

20:30.......... Modern Family

19:00...... My Kitchen Rules

20:00........ Storage Hunters

21:00.......... Karl Pilkington: The Moaning of Life

20:00 ................. CSI: Miami

21:00........................... QI XL

21:00.......... Criminal Minds

22:00 ................A League of Their Own

22:00 ........CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

22:00.. Russell Howard Live: Dingledodies

23:00...... NCIS: Los Angeles

23:00 .........................Bones

17:00 ...................The Simpsons 17:30 ........................... Futurama 18:00................... Futurama 18:30............ The Simpsons 19:00............ The Simpsons

17:00 .........Would I Lie to You?

23:15.........England’s Top 19 Footy Heroes

22:00 ...................... Britain’s Bravest Cops

06:00 ..................Good Morning Sports Fans 09:00 .............UEFA Champions League Final 10:30.............................Football’s Greatest Teams 11:30 .......... Football’s Greatest Managers 12:00 .............UEFA Champions League Final

CW 16:30 ............................Football’s 16:00 ............... Without a Trace choice Greatest Teams 17:00....................... Blue Bloods 17:00........... Pro Contract - The 18:00......................... House Football Dream 19:00..........................House 17:30............ Pro Contract - The 20:00 ...................... Walking Football Dream and Talking 18:00 ......... Pierluigi Collina 21:00 ...................Mr Sloane Master Class 22:00......... Penny Dreadful 19:30.................... European 23:05..... Last Week Tonight with John Oliver 23:40..................... The Wire

Cup Final

23:00......... Pierluigi Collina Master Class

23 CW

W C choice

Four in a Bed Channel 4, 17:00

It’s the last day of the competition and the rival B&B owners meet to settle some scores and discover what they’ve been paid. Kicking things off is Knockaloe Beg farm on the Isle of Man, and hosts Fiona and John Anderson tackle criticisms of a missing host at breakfast. Next, Phil Routledge from The Arches on the Isle of Man, takes on Robbie and John Welling from the Trafford in Blackpool about their forensic investigation, but holds his hands up about the fact they stumbled upon his personal walk-in wardrobe. Next, Robbie and John want to get a straight answer from Phil on why he wouldn’t be up for a return visit. The last host, Julie Brogan from Sheepy Lodge in the Midlands, discovers that she’s more apologetic than she thought and realises that sorry is the hardest word for her guests to hear. With all the payments finally revealed, the winner is announced.


CW 24

www.canarianweekly.com

TV Guide

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

Saturday

Saturday

06:00............................ Breakfast

06:15 .................Slaughter Trail

06:00 ....................... Fort Boyard

10:00 ............................. Saturday Kitchen Live

07:30 ......................Great British Menu

06:25............................ Dino Dan

11:30.......................Nigellissima

08:00 ......................Great British Menu

12:00 ........... Homes Under the Hammer

06:35 ........................... Dino Dan: Trek’s Adventures 06:50 ............................ Canimals

08:30...................... Great British Menu

07:05 ...................................Sooty

13:15 ....................Bargain Hunt

09:00 ......................Great British Menu

07:45.................... Horrid Henry

14:15.............................Escape to the Country

09:30 ......................Great British Menu

15:15............................. Father of the Bride

10:00 .........................FIFA World Cup 1930

16:55 .........................A Question of Sport

10:15 .........................FIFA World Cup 1954

10:20 ......... Murder, She Wrote

17:25 ................... F1: Grand Prix Qualifying

11:45 .............. Inspire: Rwanda Special

11:25 ........................ The Jeremy Kyle Show USA

18:40 .................. BBC News

12:00....................... Two Greedy Italians

12:20 ............Storage Hoarders

13:00............ Raymond Blanc’s Kitchen Secrets

15:05 ...............Peter Andre’s 60 Minute Makeover

13:30.............. Talking Pictures

16:05 .............Off Their Rockers

14:05.................................. El Cid

16:35 ....................Tipping Point

17:00 ................................Flog It!

17:35........... ITV News London

18:00............................ Golf

18:00 .........................Let Me Entertain You

13:00 ..........................BBC News

18:50 ............................. BBC London News 19:00 ....................Pointless 19:50............... The National Lottery: In It to Win It 20:40 .....................Casualty 21:30........... The Guess List 22:10................... BBC News 22:30..... Mrs. Brown’s Boys 23:00......................... Live at the Apollo 23:30............... The Football League Show

W C choice

07:20............... Digimon Fusion 08:00 ...............Adventure Time 08:25 ............................ITV News 08:30 ............................Weekend 09:25......... The Hungry Sailors 11:15............................ ITV News

13:20 ...............Beethoven’s 4th

19:00.....The Mysterious W C Mr Webster: BBC choice 18:30 .........................You’ve Arts at the Globe Been Framed! 20:00 .............. RHS Chelsea Flower Show

19:00...UEFA Champions CW League Final choice

21:00 ................. 50 Years of BBC Two Comedy

22:15 .................... ITV News

23:00 ............... Bend It Like Beckham

23:30........... Piers Morgan’s Life Stories

22:30 ...........The Americans

UEFA Champions League Final ITV1, 19.00

Adrian Chiles introduces live coverage of the UEFA Champions League Final from the Estadio da Luz in Lisbon as Real Madrid take on Atletico Madrid. It’s the first time in the tournament’s 59-year history that two rivals from the same city have met in the final and Cristiano Ronaldo and Gareth Bale will look to pose the biggest threat as Real seek to win the top prize in European club football for a record tenth time and the first time in 12 years. By contrast, 2012 Europa League winners Atletico are seeking to win this trophy for the first time after an outstanding season battling for the title in La Liga, with striker Diego Costa, midfielder Koke and goalkeeper Thibaut Courtois potentially their key players. Joining Adrian are England captain Steven Gerrard, Roy Keane and Lee Dixon, with commentary from Clive Tyldesley and Andy Townsend. Kick-off 7.45pm.


www.canarianweekly.com

TV Guide

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

Saturday

Saturday

06:05......................... The Hoobs

06:00..................... Children’s TV

06:30 ............Transworld Sport

08:05 ..........The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky

07:30 ...............................Mobil 1 08:00........... The Morning Line 09:00............ Weekend Kitchen with Waitrose 10:00................................. Frasier 10:25............. Everybody Loves Raymond 10:55 .....The Big Bang Theory 11:25 .....The Big Bang Theory 11:50.................. The Simpsons 12:20.................. The Simpsons 12:45............... Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. 13:40 ........... Channel 4 Racing 16:10 ...... Come Dine with Me 16:40 ...... Come Dine with Me 17:10...... Come Dine with Me 18:40........ Channel 4 News 19:05... The Restoration Man 20:00 .......... Grand Designs 21:00 .................... Breaking Dawn: Part 1

24th

May

06:00 ........................ Emmerdale Omnibus

06:15 ................................The Bill

06:00 ........................... Switched

07:00 ................................The Bill

06:25 ......................... Ugly Betty

08:10 ............Coronation Street Omnibus

08:00 ................................The Bill

07:10........... Make it or Break it

09:00................................ The Bill

08:00........................... Charmed

08:25...........Angelina Ballerina

10:45 ....................The Hot Desk

08:45 ...................... Rupert Bear

10:55.......... Britain’s Got Talent

09:00............. Made in Chelsea

09:00................. Ben and Holly’s Little Kingdom

10:00 ........ Extreme Makeover: Home Edition

12:10....................... Britain’s Got More Talent

11:00 ..........The Mindy Project

09:15........................ Jelly Jamm

12:00 ..................Choccywoccydoodah: Starstruck

13:10 .....You’ve Been Framed!

09:30.......................... LazyTown

14:15 .......You’ve Been Framed and Famous!

13:00 ..................Choccywoccydoodah: Starstruck

10:00 ................... Chinese Food in Minutes

14:00 ...................... Doctor Who

15:20 .......... The Mighty Ducks

10:15 .................................Access

15:00 ...................... Doctor Who

17:30................ Nanny McPhee

10:25.......... Classic Car Rescue

16:00 ...................... Doctor Who

19:25 ................... Star Wars: Episode IV - A New Hope

17:00......... Dynamo: Magician Impossible

11:25 ..................633 Squadron 13:15 ........... Columbo: Uneasy Lies the Crown 15:15 ......... Columbo: Caution, Murder Can be Hazardous to Your Health 17:10 ...................... Jesse Stone: No Remorse 18:45 .......5 News Weekend 18:50 ...................Longmire 20:30........................... NCIS

23:15...................... Copycat

23:15........................... NCIS

06:00 .....................................Glee 08:00....David Attenborough’s Galapagos 09:00..A League of Their Own 10:00....................... Soccer A.M. 12:00 ...............World Wrestling Entertainment Superstars 13:00....David Attenborough’s Micro Monsters 14:00 ...........................Futurama 15:00................ Modern Family 17:30........................... Futurama 18:00.......... Modern Family 18:30 .................. The Elaine Paige Show 19:30............ The Simpsons 20:00.............. Star-Crossed 21:00................. Revolution 22:00....................... 24: Live Another Day 23:00............. The Day After Tomorrow

06:00 ....... Emergency Abroad 07:00....... Emergency Abroad 08:00 .............. Obese: A Year to Save My Life USA 09:00 .............. Obese: A Year to Save My Life USA 10:00 ................. America’s Next Top Model 11:00............ My Kitchen Rules 12:00............ My Kitchen Rules 13:00............ My Kitchen Rules 14:00.............My Kitchen Rules 16:00 ........Nothing to Declare 19:00 ........CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 20:00................ Elementary 21:00 ....................Hannibal 22:00 ........CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 23:00 ........... Unforgettable

The first to be filmed of George Lucas’s epic sci-fi series, revamped with new scenes and special effects by the director in 1997. Following the death of his family at the hands of the evil Empire, young Luke Skywalker becomes apprentice to an ageing Jedi Knight - a warrior who harnesses the power of the all-pervading Force - and embarks on a mission to rescue a rebel princess and thwart the Empire’s plans to enslave the galaxy.

22:00 ...........Celebrity Juice 23:00 ..................... Viral Tap

07:10..................... Driving Wars 08:00 .............................Top Gear 09:00 .............................Top Gear 10:00 ..............Storage Hunters 10:30...............Storage Hunters 11:00 ....Rocket City Rednecks 11:30 ....Rocket City Rednecks 12:00.......... Lizard Lick Towing 12:30.......... Lizard Lick Towing 13:00 ................ Sin City Motors 14:00 ..............Storage Hunters 14:30 ..............Storage Hunters 15:00.............. Storage Hunters 15:30.............. Storage Hunters 16:00.............. Storage Hunters 20:00........................... QI XL 21:00 ...........................QI XL 22:00.......... Mock the Week 22:40.......... Mock the Week 23:20 ..........Mock the Week

18:00..... Dynamo: Magician Impossible 19:00..................... Dynamo: Magician Impossible 20:00..................... Dynamo: Magician Impossible 21:00 .............. The Brothers Grimm

10:00................ Rude(Ish) Tube 11:30.... Rules of Engagement 14:00........................... How I Met Your Mother 15:00......The Big Bang Theory 16:00 .............Made in Chelsea 17:00 ........................... Youngers 17:30.......................... How I Met Your Mother 18:00 .......... How I Met Your Mother 18:30........................ The Big Bang Theory 19:30........... How I Met Your Mother 20:00............ The Tomorrow People 21:00.................. Die Hard 2

23:15 .......... Almost Human

23:30........................ The Big Bang Theory

06:00 ........Devil’s Dinner Party

06:00 ................... Football Gold

07:00 .........................Visionaries: Inside the Creative Mind

06:15 ................... Football Gold

08:00.............................. Seinfeld 08:30 .............................. Seinfeld 09:00 .......Star Trek: Enterprise 10:00 .......Star Trek: Enterprise

06:30 ................... Football Gold 06:45................... Football Gold 07:00 ................... Football Gold 07:30................ Pierluigi Collina Master Class

11:00......... Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations

09:00 ...............Game Changers with David Beckham

12:00 ....................Mankind: The Story of All of Us

10:00....................... Soccer A.M.

14:00 ...................Urban Secrets 15:00 .......................Blue Bloods 16:00 .......................Blue Bloods 18:00 ......... Without a Trace 20:00 ......................... Vegas 21:00......... Penny Dreadful

13:00 ........... Pro Contract - The Football Dream 13:30 ........... Pro Contract - The Football Dream 14:00 ..................Championship Play-Off Final

22:05................... Mr Sloane

18:00 ....... UEFA Champions League Final

23:05.................... Mad Men

23:30.........................Boxing

25 CW

W C choice

The Mysterious Mr Webster: BBC Arts at the Globe BBC1, 19:00 Professor James Shapiro goes in search of the mysterious man behind plays such as The White Devil and The Duchess of Malfi. Piecing together the fragments of John Webster’s life, he explores how he came to write it just at the moment when the Jacobeans were inventing modern indoor theatre. On hand to help is Gemma Arterton, who plays the Duchess in the Globe’s candlelit production, which is also available on BBC Four. This is the story of the son of a coachmaker who ended up rivalling Shakespeare. John Webster’s life was shadowy and his plays revealed a highly developed sense of the macabre. His masterpiece, the Duchess Of Malfi is one of the jewels of the English Renaissance, a gothic tale of forbidden love, intrigue, betrayal and murder that is the most frequently performed non-Shakespearean play of the period.


CW 26

www.canarianweekly.com

TV Guide

W C choice

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

Sunday Sunday Sun 06:00 ............................Breakfast 09:00....................... The Andrew Marr Show 10:00................................ The Big Questions 11:00 ................Sunday Politics 12:15 ....................Bargain Hunt 13:00 ..........................BBC News 13:15 ........................ Countryfile Spring Special 14:15.................................. Flog it! Trade Secrets 14:45 ............................Escape to the Country 15:15 ..................Points of View 15:30 .......................... Brazil with Michael Palin 16:30 ................Songs of Praise 17:05.................. F1: Grand Prix

BBC2, 21.00 2014 is the 50th anniversary of BBC Two and the channel has commissioned Harry Enfield and Paul Whitehouse to celebrate the occasion in their own unique way, and this they are doing - both ruthlessly and Reithlessly... Inspired by Harry Enfield’s Emmy Award-winning mythical biography “Norbert Smith” and Harry and Paul’s recent Question Time spoof, Harry and Paul have come up with their own unique biography of BBC Two. In this one-off 60-minute programme, Harry and Paul - themselves popular fixtures of the channel for half the 50 years - dance through the story of BBC Two starting with its painful birth as ‘Auntie Beeb’ pushes out the now familiar ‘2’ logo into the arms, and much to the delight of, the attending BBC executives. This sets the tone as we romp through the story of 2’s highs and lows from World War One to The Great British Bake Off, via The Forsyte Saga, Tim Nice But Brooke Taylor, Late Night Line Up with Joan Bakewell Tart and Monty Python. We will be dropping into The Office and Boys From The Blackstuff, Arena, Old Grey Whistle Test and The Apprentice among many others. The whole journey is set inside a Simon Schama (played by Harry) documentary with Simon laconically walking through and linking this 50-year saga. Shot in the studio and on location, the programme will visit and parody in the region of 50 different shows and there are one 150 of BBC Two’s favourite presenters, actors, comics and politicians on parade, most of which will be portrayed by either Harry and Paul with a little help from their friends.

07:20 ........................... The Saint Takes Over

07:45 .................... Horrid Henry

10:25............................ Saturday Kitchen Best Bites

08:25 ............................ITV News

11:55.......................Two Greedy Italians 12:55........................ They Came to Cordura 14:55 ...................... Gymnastics 17:30 .................... Charley Hull: Teenage Tigress 18:00 ............................Golf

20:00 ....................Top Gear

CW

choice

22:30 .................. BBC News

22:50............................. BBC London News 23:0..................... Vote 2014 - Europe

06:50 ............................ Canimals

09:00 ........................ FIFA World Cup 1958

18:50............................. BBC London News

21:00....................Quirke

06:25............... Dino Dan: Trek’s Adventures 07:05 ...................................Sooty

18:35................... BBC News

20:00......................Antiques Roadshow

06:00 ....................... Fort Boyard

08:30 ......................Beechgrove Garden

19:00 ..................... Tropic o f Cancer

19:00................. Countryfile

Harry And Paul’s Story Of The 2s

06:15......................... The Saint’s Double Trouble

07:20 ...............Digimon Fusion 08:00 ............Deadtime Stories 08:30.............................Weekend 09:25 ..................... May the Best House Win 10:20 ......... Murder, She Wrote 11:20........... Love Your Garden 12:25............................ ITV News 12:30............. Long Lost Family 13:35................... All Star Family Fortunes 14:20..................... Black Beauty 16:00..... Let Me Entertain You 16:30........ Midsomer Murders

18:30...... ITV News London 21:00.............Harry and CW 18:45............. ITV News and Paul’s Story choice Weather of the Twos 19:00 ....Britain’s Got Talent 22:00................. Absolutely 20:15 ........ The British Soap Fabulous Awards 2014 22:30........... Steve Coogan: CW 22:20..........Perspectives choice The 23:25............. ITV News and Inside Story Weather 23:30 ................ A Cock and 23:45...... Sammy and Bruce Bull Story


www.canarianweekly.com

TV Guide

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

nday Sunday Sunday 25th May 06:15......................... The Hoobs

06:00..................... Children’s TV

06:40 .......................Ginetta GT5 Challenge

08:25 ..........Angelina Ballerina

07:10 .......................... How I Met Your Mother

08:55................ Ben and Holly’s Little Kingdom

07:35 .......................... How I Met Your Mother

09:15........................ Jelly Jamm

08:00..............Everybody Loves Raymond 08:30................................. Frasier

08:40....................... Rupert Bear

09:30.......................... LazyTown 10:00................. Power Rangers Super Samurai

09:00 .................................Frasier

10:35................. Power Rangers Megaforce

09:30 ................Sunday Brunch

11:10................................. Access

12:30 .................... Secret Eaters

11:20 ............... Meerkat Manor

13:35..... The Big Bang Theory

11:50.............. Ace Ventura: Pet Detective

14:05..... The Big Bang Theory 14:35 .....The Big Bang Theory 15:05 .................. The Simpsons 15:35 .....................Hocus Pocus 17:30 ...............Deal or No Deal 18:30 ........ Channel 4 News 19:00............... Four Rooms 20:00............... For the Love of Cars 21:00.......................... Fargo

13:35 .......... Police Academy 2: Their First Assignment 15:15 ................ Wild Wild West 17:10 ......... The Time Machine 18:55....... 5 News Weekend 19:00............... Cricket on 5 20:00............... Ghost Rider 22:00............... Drive Angry

06:00 .........................Beauty and the Geek

06:10 ................Seaside Rescue

06:00 ........................... Switched

06:35 ................Seaside Rescue

06:25 .......... Make it or Break it

06:50 ........................ Emmerdale Omnibus

07:00 ..................Choccywoccydoodah: Starstruck

07:15......................... Ugly Betty

09:15 ............Coronation Street Omnibus

09:00.............. The Hairy Bikers’ Food Tour of Britain

08:30 ................ Rude(Ish) Tube

11:45................... The Hot Desk

10:00 .............. The Hairy Bikers’ Food Tour of Britain

11:55 .................... Totally You’ve Been Framed! 12:55 .... You’ve Been Framed! Harry Hill is back to unveil some of the nation’s funniest footage captured on camcorders and mobile phones. Today’s show includes a framed gold record to make your eyes water, pink ninjas and a not-so-amazing Spiderman.

13:25........... Mr Bean’s Holiday 15:10 ................ The Lost World 17:45 ...........Star Wars: Episode V - The Empire Strikes Back 20:15 ............... Britain’s Got More Talent 21:20 ............. Funniest Ever You’ve Been Framed! 22:00 .....................Viral Tap

15:00 .......................... How I Met Your Mother

16:00 ............. Dynamo Top Ten Greatest Moments

16:00 .....The Big Bang Theory

17:00 ......... Dynamo: Magician Impossible

16:30 .....The Big Bang Theory

18:00..... Dynamo: Magician Impossible

18:00.....Brooklyn Nine-Nine

19:00..... Dynamo: Magician Impossible 20:00..... Dynamo: Magician Impossible 21:00..... Dynamo: Magician Impossible

17:00......The Tomorrow People 18:30 ....................... The Big Bang Theory 19:00............................ Troy 20:00 .......... Romancing the Stone 22:10 .....The Inbetweeners

08:00............... The Guest Wing

07:00 ............ Football Gold

09:00 .........Friday Night Lights

08:30 ........... Championship Play-Off Final

10:00 ........................Emergency Animal Rescue

09:00................The Road to Rio 10:30...............Storage Hunters

11:00 ............ WWE Experience

11:00 ................. America’s Next Top Model

12:00 ................Modern Family

12:00 ...................Luton Airport

13:00........................... Futurama

12:30................... Luton Airport

15:00 ...............................Red Bull Soapbox Race

14:00....A League of Their Own

13:00................... Luton Airport

17:00 .............................Top Gear

14:30 ................Modern Family

16:00 ........Nothing to Declare

18:00........ Storage Hunters

16:30 .................. The Simpsons

16:30 ........Nothing to Declare

18:00 .............. About a Boy

18:00.... Nothing to Declare

19:00 ........England’s Top 19 Footy Heroes

18:30 ............The Simpsons

20:00.............. Chicago Fire

19:00 ....The Ones to Watch

21:00 ........ Obese: A Year to Save My Life USA

W C choice

15:00 ..........Dynamo Revealed

06:30............. Football Gold

09:30 .................X-Men: Legacy

23:05......... Grey’s Anatomy

14:05 ............................ Revenge

07:00............................... Seinfeld

09:30........................ Emergency Animal Rescue

22:00 ..... NCIS: Los Angeles

14:00 .... Super Smart Animals

08:00..................... Three Men in Another Boat

09:00......Sports Women Week

09:00 .................X-Men: Days of Future Past Special

22:30............... The Moodys

13:00 .............Made in Chelsea

06:00............. Football Gold

07:00 .....................................Glee

21:00 ............ Hawaii Five-0

13:00.... Super Smart Animals

06:00 ........Devil’s Dinner Party

06:00 .. RSPCA Animal Rescue

22:00.............. Trying Again

12:30........................... Youngers

07:10..................... Three Men in Another Boat

06:00..........The Hour of Power

20:30................... Futurama

10:00 .......Hollyoaks Omnibus

23:10 ....................... The Big Bang Theory

23:55 ............ Car Crime UK: Caught on Camera

20:00 ............The Simpsons

09:00 .......................... How I Met Your Mother

22:00 ........... V for Vendetta

22:05..................... Kick-Ass

10:00 ...............World Wrestling Entertainment Superstars

11:00............ Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within

08:00 ................ Rude(Ish) Tube

22:45 ... Britain’s Got Talent

10:00 ..............Storage Hunters 11:00 ..............Storage Hunters

20:00 .....................24 Hours to Go Broke 21:00 ..........Mock the Week 21:40 ..........Mock the Week 22:20 ........England’s Top 19 Footy Heroes 23:20...........Mock the Week

10:00 .......Star Trek: Enterprise 13:00 ...................Urban Secrets 14:00 ......... Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations 15:00....................... Blue Bloods 16:00........................Blue Bloods 17:00 ............... Without a Trace 18:00.......... Without a Trace 19:00.......... Without a Trace 20:00.....Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations 21:00....... Game of Thrones 22:00 ......... Penny Dreadful 23:05 ...........X-Men: Days of Future Past Special 23:35............. The Sopranos

Perspectives: Bruce Forsyth on Sammy Davis Jr ITV1, 22.20

“Many people ask me what I’ve enjoyed most in my long career in showbusiness. My answer is always the same. Working with Sammy Davis Jr on a special we made together in 1980. Of all of the many shows I’ve been associated with – well, that was the best,” says Sir Bruce Forsyth. Sir Bruce Forsyth considers Sammy Davis Jr to be the greatest entertainer of all time – a performer who could sing, dance, act, tell jokes, do impersonations…and all to an astonishingly high standard. His was a career that emerged from the dying days of vaudeville and continued to superstardom, taking in nightclub performances, Broadway and West End theatre, Hollywood movies, network television the biggest showrooms in Las Vegas and performances for royalty and presidents. Bruce meets friends and collaborators of Sammy Davis Jnr, people who worked with him on some of his most celebrated performances and travels to the US and London to visit locations important in Sammy’s life and career, including the location of his 1954 car accident. Sir Bruce first met Sammy Davis Jr in May 1960 when he was hosting The Royal Command Performance in front of Her Majesty The Queen, and Sammy was top of the bill. And so began a friendship that lasted to Sammy’s death in 1990.

09:30 ....... UEFA Champions League Final 10:30.. Sunday Supplement 12:00....... Goals on Sunday 13:00 ......Pro Contract - The Football Dream 13:30 ......Pro Contract - The Football Dream 14:00 .....................League 1 Play-Off Final 17:30 ..................... Football 21:00........................ Boxing 22:00......................League 1 Play-Off Final 23:00 ..............International Football

27 CW

W C choice Quirke Christine Falls BBC1, 21.00

Late autumn in Dublin 1956, and city pathologist Quirke – we never get to know his Christian name – stumbles in late one night from a party in the nurses’ quarters, with a view to sleeping off his hangover in his pathology lab. To Quirke’s surprise, he finds obstetric consultant Malachy Griffin, his adoptive brother, at his desk completing some paperwork for a recently deceased patient named Christine Falls. Mal is not thrilled to see Quirke, a fact that troubles Quirke when he returns the next morning to find Christine’s body gone. Consumed by curiosity over what Mal may have been up to, Quirke calls the body back from the morgue and performs a full post mortem. There is little love lost between Quirke and Mal, so Quirke is determined to call his brother to account, and as he closes in on Mal’s secret, he stirs up a hornets’ nest of trouble for himself. As the trail turns darker and more violent Quirke’s investigations take him to Boston, and to the very heart of his complicated extended family. During his trip, Quirke uncovers the truth about a family secret that has remained buried for nearly 20 years.


CW 28

www.canarianweekly.com

TV Guide

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

Monday Monday Mo 06:00............................ Breakfast 09:00 .......................Fake Britain 09:45.................... Homes Under the Hammer

W C choice Goodness Gracious Me BBC2, 22.00 Sanjeev Bhaskar, Kulvinder Ghir, Meera Syal and Nina Wadia reunite for a one-off special of the ground-breaking British Asian sketch show. The all-new material features favourite characters from the original series, including how you can tell Sherlock Holmes comes from India; some very competitive Grandmothers; a bit of politics with the Kapoors (pronounced “Cooper”); and a surprisingly high-tech use for an aubergine. Plus, there’s some unusually hard-hitting legal advice; a very scary nanny; and the heart-breaking denoument of black-and-white movie classic Madrasablanca.

10:45 ................................ Caught Red Handed

Jo Frost hosts an inspiring new talk show for ITV Daytime. The world renowned parenting expert is back on homeground, doing what she does best and helping British families in crisis. Along the way, Jo will meet a range of families, from absent parents whose grown-up children have disowned them, to tear-away teens turning their homes into war zones; recently formed step families struggling to accept their new living arrangements and families torn apart by extramarital affairs. Jo is on hand to explore the conflict and emotion of families across the nation, and offer real, workable solutions. Each programme will see Jo meet two families with different problems. By going into the contributor’s home, Jo will capture first hand the challenges that are tearing the family unit apart. Using her knowledge and expertise, Jo will be on hand to talk through these issues and cradle the family’s vulnerabilities before inviting the family into the studio to find resolution in her genuine no-nonsense Jo Frost style.

07:10 .............. Call the Council

08:30 .............................Lorraine

07:55 ........................When Time Ran Out

09:25........................ The Jeremy Kyle Show

09:40 .....................The Pallisers

10:30 ...........Storage Hoarders

10:35 .....................The Pallisers

12:00.................... Bargain Hunt

11:30...................................... Golf

11:30 ...............Peter Andre’s 60 Minute Makeover

13:00 ............BBC News at One 13:15 ......... BBC London News

13:30 ................. Wanted Down Under Revisited

13:30 ............................. The Link

14:15 ..............Talking Pictures

14:15............................ Escape to the Country

14:45 ..................... Cat on a Hot Tin Roof

15:15............... The Hairy Bikers’ Best of British

16:30.............................. Nature’s Great Events

16:15.......................RHS Chelsea Flower Show

17:30 ................................Flog It!

16:45 ........ Antiques Road Trip 17:30 ............................ Pointless 18:15......... BBC News at Six 18:45..... BBC London News

18:15.................. Eggheads 18:45.....................Celebrity Antiques Road Trip

19:00........... The One Show

19:30 .......................... Great British Menu

19:30................. EastEnders

20:00............. Springwatch

20:00 ............. Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides

21:00 ..................... The Fast Show Special

22:05........ BBC News at Ten 22:30 .... BBC London News 22:40 .......... Have I Got a Bit More News for You

W C choice

ITV1, 14.00

06:00.................................... Good Morning Britain

11:15............... Call the Council

23:25............... The Football League Show

Jo Frost Family Matters

06:10 ...................Homes Under the Hammer

21:30................ Inside No 9

12:30 ..................... Dinner Date 13:30............................. ITV News and Weather 14:00.........................Jo Frost W C Family Matters choice 15:00 .........................Dickinson’s Real Deal 16:00.......................Ejector Seat 17:00 ..............................The Paul O’Grady Show 18:00.......ITV News London 18:15 ............. ITV News and Weather 18:30................ You’ve Been Framed! 19:00 ............... Emmerdale 19:30....Britain’s Got Talent 21:00..... Coronation Street

21:30..Britain’s Got Talent CW choice 22:00...............Goodness W C Gracious Me: choice 22:00......... ITV News at Ten 22:20 ......Off Their Rockers Reunion Special 22:45 ..................Benidorm 22:30................. Newsnight 23:05 ................. 50 Years of BBC Two Comedy

23:45......... Joanna Lumley’s Greek Odyssey

Britain’s Got Talent: 2014 Live semi-finals ITV1, 19.30 After thousands applied and hundreds auditioned for the judges, the search reaches the live semi-finals. The final 45 acts now perform live in the hope of impressing the judges Simon Cowell, Amanda Holden, Alesha Dixon and David Walliams, as well as winning the all-important public vote. Stripped across the week the live semi-finals start on Monday and each night award winning duo Ant and Dec welcome nine acts to the stage to perform for a chance of winning a life changing £250,000 and a spot at this year’s Royal Variety Performance. While the judges will be on hand to offer their opinions, the viewing public will vote for their favourite and the act with the highest number of public votes automatically goes through to the live grand final. The two runnerup acts will then face the judges who will pick their favourite to go through to the live shows.


www.canarianweekly.com

TV Guide

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

onday Monday Monday 26th May 06:05 ...................... Countdown

06:00..................... Children’s TV

06:00 ........................Emmerdale

06:10.......... Dynamo Revealed

06:00 ........................... Switched

06:50 .......... Garfield Gets Real

08:00 ........................ Fifi and the Flowertots

06:25 ...........Coronation Street

07:00 ............Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within

06:25 ..................................90210

08:10 ..........................Peppa Pig

07:20.....................The Hot Desk

09:00 ......... Dynamo: Magician Impossible

07:55 ........................... Charmed

08:15 ......... Dr. Dolittle: Million Dollar Mutts 10:00 ............ Undercover Boss

08:30......... Milkshake Monkey

11:00 ...... Come Dine with Me

08:35....Toby’s Travelling Circus

11:30 ...... Come Dine with Me

08:45....... Bananas in Pyjamas

12:00 ...... Come Dine with Me

09:00 ........................ Tickety Toc

12:35 ...... Come Dine with Me

09:15.............. The Wright Stuff

13:05 ...... Come Dine with Me

11:10..........Police Interceptors

13:40 ...........French Collection

12:10 ...............Chinese Food in Minutes

14:40 ...................... Countdown 15:30 ...............Deal or No Deal 16:30 ...............................Draw it! 17:00 ....................Four in a Bed

12:30 .........5 News Lunchtime 12:35............. Home and Away 13:05...................... Neighbours 13:35.................................... NCIS

06:55........... Coronation Street 07:30 ....Dinner Date Australia 08:20 .....You’ve Been Framed! 09:20 .....You’ve Been Framed! 10:25 .....You’ve Been Framed! 11:30 ........................Emmerdale 12:00 ...........Coronation Street 12:30 ...........Coronation Street 13:00 ...............The British Soap Awards 2014 15:00......................... The Jeremy Kyle Show

14:35........ The Devil’s Brigade

16:05......................... The Jeremy Kyle Show

17:00........................5 News at 5

17:10 ..........Britain’s Got Talent

19:00 ........ Channel 4 News

17:30 ...................... Neighbours

20:00 ................ The World’s Weirdest Weather

18:00 ........Home and Away

18:25 ............... Britain’s Got More Talent

18:30....... The Dam Busters

CW 22:00...........Man v Weird CW

20:50 ....................... 5 News

23:00 ................ Gogglebox

22:40........ Raid on Rommel

17:30 ...... Come Dine with Me 18:00 ............The Simpsons 18:30 .................. Hollyoaks

21:00......The Island with Bear Grylls

choice choice

21:00 .................... What the Dambusters Did Next

06:00 ..................Gadget Geeks

06:00............. Motorway Patrol

07:00 .............Stargate Atlantis

06:30 .............Motorway Patrol

08:00 ...........................Futurama

07:00........ Nothing to Declare

08:30 ...........................Futurama

07:30 ........Nothing to Declare

09:00........................... Futurama

08:00... RSPCA Animal Rescue

09:30 ...........................Futurama

09:00 ..............UK Border Force

10:00 ................... Hawaii Five-0

10:00 ........... Sun, Sea and A&E

13:00 .......... NCIS: Los Angeles

11:00 ............My Kitchen Rules

15:00 .............Stargate Atlantis

12:00 ............. CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

16:00 ...........................Futurama 16:30 ...........................Futurama 17:00 .................. The Simpsons 17:30........................... Futurama 18:30............ The Simpsons 20:30.......... Modern Family 21:00 .............. About a Boy 21:30 ................A League of Their Own 22:00 ............... Intelligence 23:00..... NCIS: Los Angeles

14:00 ................Criminal Minds 16:00 ............My Kitchen Rules 17:00... RSPCA Animal Rescue 18:00 ... Nothing to Declare 19:00....... My Kitchen Rules 20:00 ......................... Bones 21:00 ......... Criminal Minds 22:00 ........CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 23:00.....................Hannibal

19:25 .......... The Lost World 22:00................ Britain’s Got More Talent 23:00 ...........Celebrity Juice 23:50... Two and a Half Men

07:10 ......... Three Men in More Than One Boat 09:00 ...............................Red Bull Soapbox Race 11:00 .............................Top Gear 12:00 ..................... World’s Most Dangerous Roads 13:00 ..................... World’s Most Dangerous Roads 14:00 ..................... World’s Most Dangerous Roads 15:00 ......................... Red Dwarf 15:40 ......................... Red Dwarf 16:20 ......................... Red Dwarf 17:00 ......................... Red Dwarf 19:00......... The Road to Rio 20:00......... Motorway Cops 21:00.......... Mock the Week 22:20 ....Would I Lie to You? 23:00 ................................QI 23:40 ..........Mock the Week

10:00......... Dynamo: Magician Impossible 11:00 ......... Dynamo: Magician Impossible 12:00.......... Dynamo: Magician Impossible 13:00......... Dynamo: Magician Impossible 14:00......... Dynamo: Magician Impossible 15:00 ......... Dynamo: Magician Impossible 16:00 ......... Dynamo: Magician Impossible 17:00 ......... Dynamo: Magician Impossible 18:00..... Dynamo: Magician Impossible

07:10 ......................... Ugly Betty 09:00 .............Made in Chelsea 10:00 ................ Rude(Ish) Tube 11:00 ........................... Charmed 12:00 ... Rules of Engagement 12:30 ...........................Hollyoaks 13:00 .......................... How I Met Your Mother 14:00..... The Big Bang Theory 15:00 ... Rules of Engagement 16:00 ................ Rude(Ish) Tube 17:00...............................How I Met Your Mother 18:00 .The Big Bang Theory 19:00................... Hollyoaks 19:30................... How I Met Your Mother 20:00 . Brooklyn Nine-Nine

20:00........ Dynamo Top Ten Greatest Moments

20:30 ..............2 Broke Girls

21:00............ V for Vendetta

22:00 ....... Made in Chelsea

23:40................ Cops Uncut

23:00...................... Drifters

06:00 .............Thirtysomething 07:00....................... Blue Bloods 08:00........Star Trek: Enterprise 09:00 ............... Without a Trace 10:00 .......................Blue Bloods 11:00 ................... Stargate SG-1 12:00 ............... Without a Trace 13:00 ..................................House 14:00 ..................................House 15:00 .......Star Trek: Enterprise 16:00 ............... Without a Trace 17:00....................... Blue Bloods 18:00......................... House 19:00 .........................House 20:00.......................... Friday Night Lights 21:00 ......... Penny Dreadful 22:05 ...................Mr Sloane 23:05 ................... Curb Your Enthusiasm

21:00 .................... Revenge

06:00 ..................Good Morning Sports Fans 07:00 ..................Good Morning Sports Fans 08:00................. Good Morning Sports Fans 10:00............... Sporting Greats 13:00 ...............Sporting Greats Joe Frazier. A chance to relive some of the most memorable moments in the glittering career of Smokin’ Joe Frazier. One of boxing’s true greats, Frazier was an Olympic and World Heavyweight Champion.

13:30 ...............Sporting Greats 14:00 .............................League 2 Play-Off Final 18:00 ................................Boxing 19:00 .........Sporting Greats 19:30 ............... Elite League Speedway 21:30..........Sporting Greats

29 CW

W C choice

The Island with Bear Grylls Channel 4, 21:00

Three weeks into their survival experience and the group is barely getting by on a meagre diet of snails and coconuts. Willing to take ever greater risks for food, Mike and Chris battle with dangerous tides, while tempers fray as it appears that not everyone is pulling their weight. Even when famine gives way to a rare feast, the fragile peace is fleeting. Frustrated by their failure to find another caiman croc, a hunting party risks a trip to the treacherous mangroves at night.

Man v Weird Channel 4, 22:00

Simon Farnaby travels the globe looking for people who claim to have extraordinary powers. In the concluding episode he meets people who say they can perform miraculous feats using just the power of their minds. Simon meets Indonesia’s leading shaman, Ngurah Harta, who appears to cut Simon with a razor without injury. In Romania, Simon wants to know if renowned healer Zinaida can actually make him levitate. In Amsterdam, Simon submits to the stare of divine gazer Braco. He meets Goran the human fish in Croatia.


CW 30

www.canarianweekly.com

TV Guide

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

Tuesday

Tuesday

09:15 .......................Fake Britain

06:05 ...................Homes Under the Hammer

06:00.................. Good Morning Britain

10:00 ................... Homes Under the Hammer

07:05................................ Caught Red Handed

08:30 ..............................Lorraine

11:00..... Caught Red Handed

07:35............... Call the Council

09:25 ........................ The Jeremy Kyle Show

11:30 ...............Call the Council

08:20 ............. Countryside 999

10:30..................... This Morning

12:15 ....................Bargain Hunt

09:05......................... Watchdog

11:25 ............................ITV News

13:00........... BBC News at One

10:05 ....... Real Lives Reunited

11:30 .................... This Morning

13:30 ......... BBC London News

10:35 ...........................HARDtalk

12:30 .................. Loose Women

13:45 .............................. Doctors

11:00...........................BBC News

14:15 ............................. The Link

11:30............. BBC World News 12:00 Jubal

13:30 .............................ITV News and Weather

06:00............................. Breakfas

15:00 ............................Escape to the Country 15:30 .............. The Hairy Bikers’ Best of British

13:35 ..........................The Super League Show 14:20...................... The Pallisers

14:00................................ Jo Frost Family Matters 15:00 .........................Dickinson’s Real Deal 16:00 .......................Ejector Seat

16:30 ........ Antiques Road Trip

15:15.............. Cash in the Attic

17:15 ............................ Pointless

15:45 .................... Big Cat Diary

18:00 ........ BBC News at Six 19:00 ...........The One Show

16:15 .............................. Nature’s Great Events

19:30 ................ EastEnders

17:15 ................................ Flog It!

20:00 ..................Holby City

18:00 .................. Eggheads

18:30............. ITV News and Weather

18:30.....Celebrity Antiques Road Trip

19:00 ................ Emmerdale

Amy’s world is turned upside down when she finally gets what she wants in an unexpected way - but she may not be able to escape her past mistakes. Serena is faced with a heartbreaking decision when her mother pays an unexpected visit to Holby, and Adele shows her true potential when she’s given the opportunity to shine by Jonny.

21:00............. Happy Valley 22:00........ BBC News at Ten 22:35 .................. Imagine... 23:45 ........ White Oleander

19:30........................... Great British Menu 20:00 ..............Springwatch 21:00.....Welcome to Rio

CW

choice

17:00.............................. The Paul O’Grady Show 18:00..................... ITV News London

19:30 ...................... Britain’s Got Talent 21:00 ..... Coronation Street 21:30 ...................... Britain’s Got Talent

22:00........ Later Live... with Jools Holland

22:00................ ITV News at Ten and Weather

22:30 .................Newsnight

22:35.................... The Cube

23:20 ..... The Culture Show

23:35 ................ Wild Britain with Ray Mears

23:50 ......................Horizon

W C choice

Welcome To Rio BBC2, 21.00 As the eyes of the world turn to Rio de Janeiro for the 2014 World Cup, Welcome To Rio, a new three-part series for BBC Two explores life inside Rio’s famous shanty-towns. With extraordinary access, this series explores the lives of its residents, revealing the favelas to be places of energy, resourcefulness and humour. As part of the preparations for the World Cup and Olympics, the Brazilian government has launched a military campaign to wrest control of the favelas from the drug gangs, a process they call ‘Pacification’. The series shows how Pacification threatens the favelas’ whole way of life, creating new problems even as it solves the old. The first episode is filmed in one of the first favelas to be pacified, Cantagalo, and follows its residents, including Rocky, a delivery man extraordinaire, who works every day to support his family carrying fridges, ovens and televisions on his shoulders up Cantagalo’s labyrinth of secret staircases. He’s also got to deal with his wayward son Felipe, who’s caught up in the battle between the police and drug traffickers for control of the hill. The film also follows resident Acme, a graffiti artist who lives with his family beside a football pitch where drug traffickers used to execute those who broke their rules. The shooting may have stopped but Acme faces a new threat: thanks to Pacification, the government has declared his house is unsafe and now has to be demolished.


www.canarianweekly.com

TV Guide

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

Tuesday

Tuesday

27th

May

06:00 ...................... Countdown

06:00..................... Children’s TV

06:00........................ Emmerdale

06:10 ...................Total Wipeout

06:00............................... Switched

06:45............. According to Jim

08:35... Toby’s Travelling Circus

06:25........... Coronation Street

07:00 .....MasterChef Australia

06:25...................................... 90210

07:10.....3rd Rock from the Sun

08:45 .......Bananas in Pyjamas

06:55 .....You’ve Been Framed!

08:00 .......... Beverly Hills Pawn

07:10............................. Ugly Betty

07:35............... King of Queens

08:55..........Milkshake Monkey

08:30 .......... Beverly Hills Pawn

08:00 ............................... Charmed

08:00 .............Everybody Loves Raymond

09:00........................ Tickety Toc

07:45 ........................ The Jeremy Kyle Show USA

09:00 ................................The Bill

09:00................ Made in Chelsea

09:15 ..............The Wright Stuff

08:30...................... Dinner Date

09:00................................. Frasier

10:00................................ The Bill

10:00.................... Rude(Ish) Tube

11:10......... Police Interceptors

10:00............ Undercover Boss

11:00......................... The Glades

10:30 ....................Rude(Ish) Tube

12:10 .........5 News Lunchtime

09:30 ..... The Real Housewives of Orange County

11:00 ...... Come Dine with Me

10:30 ....Dinner Date Australia

11:00 ............................... Charmed

12:15 ............ Cowboy Builders

12:00 ...................... Who Do You Think You Are? USA

11:30 ..................The Millionaire Matchmaker

13:00 ................... Bondi Rescue

12:30 .............................. Hollyoaks

13:30 ................... Bondi Rescue

13:00 .. How I Met Your Mother

14:00........ Extreme Makeover: Home Edition

14:00 ....... The Big Bang Theory

15:00 ........ Extreme Makeover: Home Edition

16:00.................... Rude(Ish) Tube

12:00.............. Channel 4 News

13:15 .............Home and Away

12:05...... Come Dine with Me

13:45 ...................... Neighbours

13:40 ...........French Collection

14:15 .................................... NCIS

14:40 ...................... Countdown

15:15 ...... Lies Among Friends

15:30............... Deal or No Deal

17:00 .......................5 News at 5

16:30 ...............................Draw it!

17:30 ...................... Neighbours

17:00 ....................Four in a Bed

18:00........ Home and Away

17:30 ...... Come Dine with Me

18:30 ......... 5 News Tonight

18:00 ............The Simpsons 18:30 .................. Hollyoaks 19:00 ........ Channel 4 News

19:00 .... Classic Car Rescue 20:00............Ben Fogle’s Animal Clinic

CW

choice

20:00.... Location, Location, Location

21:00 ............ The Mentalist

22:00...Embarrassing Bodies

23:05 ..................... Coppers

23:00 ........CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

06:00 ..................Gadget Geeks

06:00..............Motorway Patrol

21:00...The Complainers CW choice

22:00 ........CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

07:00 .............Stargate Atlantis

06:30............. Motorway Patrol

08:00............................Futurama

07:00........ Nothing to Declare

08:30........................... Futurama

07:30........ Nothing to Declare

09:00........................... Futurama

08:00... RSPCA Animal Rescue

09:30 ...........................Futurama

08:30... RSPCA Animal Rescue

10:00 ................... Hawaii Five-0

09:00.............. UK Border Force

11:00 ................... Hawaii Five-0

10:00........... Sun, Sea and A&E

13:00 .......... NCIS: Los Angeles

11:00 ............My Kitchen Rules

15:00............. Stargate Atlantis

12:00 ............. CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

16:00........................... Futurama 16:30 ...........................Futurama 17:00 .................. The Simpsons 17:30........................... Futurama 18:00................... Futurama 18:30............ The Simpsons

14:00 ................Criminal Minds 16:00.............My Kitchen Rules 17:00... RSPCA Animal Rescue 18:00.... Nothing to Declare 19:00 ...... My Kitchen Rules

20:00............. Hawaii Five-0

20:00 .........................Bones

21:00 ...................... The Day After Tomorrow

21:00 ................Elementary 22:00 ....................Hannibal

23:20............. Hawaii Five-0

23:00 .........................Bones

12:30........................ Emmerdale 13:00........... Coronation Street 13:30 .....You’ve Been Framed! 14:00.................. The Millionaire Matchmaker 14:50.. The Jeremy Kyle Show

17:00.......................Booze Patrol Australia

17:00.......... Britain’s Got Talent

18:00 .............Bondi Rescue

18:30....... Britain’s Got Talent

18:30 .............Bondi Rescue

19:00 ...You’ve Been Framed!

19:00 .... Beverly Hills Pawn

21:00 ....The Vampire Diaries

20:00 .... Dynamo: Magician Impossible

22:00 ............... Britain’s Got More Talent

21:00 .......... Almost Human

23:00 ...........Celebrity Juice

22:00............ Derren Brown

23:50... Two and a Half Men

23:00 .......... Almost Human

07:10 ...............................Red Bull X-Fighters 2013 08:00 .............................Top Gear 09:00 ..................... World’s Most Dangerous Roads 10:00.......... Lizard Lick Towing 11:00 .............................Top Gear 12:00.......................... Have I Got News for You 12:40 .......................................... QI 13:20.................... Only Connect 14:00............... Motorway Cops 15:00............................. Top Gear 17:00 .........Would I Lie to You? 17:40.......................................... QI 18:20 .............Only Connect 19:00 ........Storage Hunters 20:00 ..........Sin City Motors 21:00 ........England’s Top 19 Footy Heroes 22:00 .................24 Hours to Go Broke

06:00 .............Thirtysomething 07:00 .......................Blue Bloods 08:00 .......Star Trek: Enterprise 09:00 ............... Without a Trace 10:00 .......................Blue Bloods 11:00 ................... Stargate SG-1 12:00 ............... Without a Trace 13:00 ..................................House 14:00.................................. House 15:00....... Star Trek: Enterprise 16:00 ............... Without a Trace 17:00 .......................Blue Bloods 18:00......................... House 19:00......................... House 20:00.................. The British 21:00......... Penny Dreadful 22:05.................. Entourage 22:40 ..............How to Make it in America 23:15......................... Treme

12:00 ......Rules of Engagement

15:00...... Rules of Engagement 16:30.................... Rude(Ish) Tube 17:00.............................. How I Met Your Mother 18:00 ...The Big Bang Theory 19:00 ..................... Hollyoaks 19:30............. How I Met Your Mother 20:00........................ Stardust 22:35 ....... Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. 23:35....The Big Bang Theory

06:00................. Good Morning Sports Fans 07:00 ..................Good Morning Sports Fans 08:00 ..................Good Morning Sports Fans 10:00 .................................Boxing 13:30................................. Boxing 14:30............................. Sporting Heroes 15:30............... Sporting Greats 16:00.............. Ringside Special 17:00 .................................Boxing 19:00 ........................Boxing 19:30..................... Ringside 20:30 ..................... Sporting Greats 21:00 ........Ringside Special 22:00........................ Boxing 23:30 ........................Boxing

31 CW

W C choice The Complainers, Channel 4, 21:00

In 2013, 38 million complaints were lodged against corporations in the UK, and as our expectations of exceptional customer service rise, companies are coming back with new ways of dealing with us. This series tells the stories of the back-and-forth between some of the nation’s most persistent and stubborn complainers, and the vast businesses and councils who deal with their complaints. This first episode goes inside the complaints department of Transport for London. With over a million more people in the capital than ten years ago, the city’s roads are fit to burst, and a new generation of complainers are turning up the heat.

Ben Fogle’s Animal Clinic Channel 5, 20:00

In this epsiode, a Labrador called Murphy needs cuttingedge surgery to repair his leg, a horse called Ellie has an itch that she cannot scratch and two Longhorn cows need their hooves clipping. Also an obese cat called Louis needs help getting into shape and an elderly rabbit called Parsley has to have his teeth trimmed.


CW 32

W C choice

www.canarianweekly.com

TV Guide

On Assignment ITV1, 22.35 Fronted by Rageh Omaar, ITV News’ award-winning team of specialist journalists contribute indepth reports from around the world on unique stories, and stories behind the headlines. The following reports will air in the third programme:

John Irvine – rape – India Mother India – a country that has nurtured such strong female icons as Indira Gandhi and Mother Teresa is struggling with the issue of rape. It is said to be one of India’s most common crimes against women. The UN have referred to it as ‘a national problem’. There has been an eight-fold increase in rape over the past few decades and India now ranks as the worst country among the G20 in which to be a woman. How has this culture of violent sexual abuse of women built up? And what is being done about it? John Irvine travels to India and talks to victims, families and campaigners about how they are fighting for change. He visits Bollywood and meets industry superstars taking on the issue of rape in the world’s largest democracy. Rohit Kachroo – wine making – South Africa It’s twenty years since South Africans voted in the first democratic elections. And this month, they did it again - with first time voters who were ‘born free’. Since the inauguration of Nelson Mandela, there’s been a generation of change - but in some parts of the country change is coming slowly. Rohit Kachroo talks to one of South Africa’s rare black female winemakers about how, post-apartheid, she has found her place at the heart of a traditionally white and male industry and hopes to break even more boundaries in the future. The stunning landscape of the wine lands seem timeless. And yet every year the taste of the grapes they produce changes just a little bit. But the real evolution is happening within this industry as it catches up with the rest of South Africa. Lucy Watson – China Newly appointed China Correspondent Lucy Watson joins the On Assignment team to report from Beijing on how the country is grappling with its past.

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

Wednesday 06:00 ............................Breakfast 09:15........................Fake Britain 10:00................... Homes Under the Hammer 11:00..... Caught Red Handed 11:30 ...............Call the Council 12:15 ....................Bargain Hunt 13:00........... BBC News at One 13:30......... BBC London News 13:45 .............................. Doctors 14:15 ............................. The Link 15:00............................ Escape to the Country

06:00 ................. Homes Under the Hammer

06:00 ................. Good Morning Britain

07:00 ..................... Caught Red Handed

08:30 ..............................Lorraine

07:30 ..............................Call the Council 08:15 .............Don’t Get Done, Get Dom 09:00 ..............Amazon’s Retail Revolution: Business Boomers 10:00 ....................... Bang Goes the Theory 10:30.......................... See Hear

15:30 .............. The Hairy Bikers’ Best of British

11:00........................ BBC News

16:30............................. Antiques Road Trip

12:00 .............................. Kismet

11:30 ...........BBC World News

17:15............................. Pointless

13:50 ...........Raymond Blanc’s Kitchen Secrets

18:00 ........ BBC News at Six

14:20 ................... The Pallisers

18:30..... BBC London News

15:15 ........... Cash in the Attic

19:00 ...........The One Show

15:45 ..................Big Cat Diary

20:00...................Watchdog

16:15 .............................Nature’s Great Events

21:00 ..................... Del Boys and Dealers Documentary series following the nation’s wheeler dealers. South London trader Ernest believes a bronze chess set, which he bought at an antique fair in Kent, is an original piece by three of the nation’s most renowned sculptors. Auction regulars Sharon and Al from Essex go on a weekend away in France where they attempt to clean up at a local auction. There’s only one problem - they don’t speak a world of French between them. Del girls Stevie and Denise from Canterbury dream of turning rags into riches selling the second-hand clothes from suitcases which they bid on at Greasby’s, a well-known south London auction house. Essex trader Steve is embarking on a career as a wheeler dealer after 25 years in the building trade. After a patchy start to the world of buying and selling, Steve takes his first trip to a big London auction, where he hopes to land a German helmet from the Second World War.

22:00 ....... BBC News at Ten 22:25 .... BBC London News 22:35 ................. A Question of Sport 23:05 ........... The Guess List 23:50..................... It’s a Boy Girl Thing

Wednes

17:15.............................. Flog It! 18:00 .................Eggheads 18:30....................Celebrity Antiques Road Trip 19:30..........................Great British Menu Great British Menu is back and 24 of the nation’s top chefs are competing for the chance to cook at a glorious banquet marking the 70th anniversary of D-Day. The Welsh chefs Andy Beaumont, David Kelman and Mary Ann Gilchrist are all hoping to score highly with their very individual main courses. Mary Ann is taking a risk with another austerity-themed dish and Andy is paying tribute to the historical Woolton pie; but will it be David’s unusual and deeply personal creation, inspired by his late grandmother, which triumphs?

20:00 ............Springwatch 21:10 ........Coast Australia 22:00 .................. Episodes 22:30 ............... Newsnight 23:20 ................Watermen: A Dirty Business

09:25 ........................ The Jeremy Kyle Show 10:30.................... This Morning 11:25............................ ITV News 11:30 .................... This Morning 12:30 .................. Loose Women 13:30............................. ITV News and Weather 14:00................................ Jo Frost Family Matters 15:00 .........................Dickinson’s Real Deal 16:00 .......................Ejector Seat Andi Peters presents the game show in which contestants compete against each other answering general knowledge questions to try and win the 10,000 pound jackpot. For every question answered right the contestant remains where they are, but get a question wrong and their seat starts moving back towards the edge. If a contender hits the edge, they get ejected - in spectacular fashion!

17:00 ..............................The Paul O’Grady Show 18:00 ...... ITV News London 18:30............. ITV News and Weather 19:00................ Emmerdale 19:30 ....Britain’s Got Talent 21:00 ..... Coronation Street 21:30 ....Britain’s Got Talent After a tense wait, it is time to find out which act has the highest number of public votes and automatically goes through to the live grand final. The two runners-up have to face the judges again. In addition to performances by this year’s contestants, a star-studded line-up takes to the stage.

22:00 ......... ITV News at Ten 22:35.....On Assignment

CW

choice

23:10 ................ Total Recall Classic but brutal sci-fi action thriller set in 2084, based on a Philip K. Dick short story. Douglas Quaid has an ordinary life, although he dreams nightly of Mars - a planet he has never visited. Determined to find the meaning of these dreams, he visits Rekall Inc - a specialist in memory implants - intent on buying a memory ‘holiday’ trip to Mars.


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TV Guide

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

sday

Wednesday

06:00...................... Countdown 06:45............ According to Jim 07:10.....3rd Rock from the Sun 07:35 ............... King of Queens 08:00 .............Everybody Loves Raymond 09:00 .................................Frasier 10:00............ Undercover Boss 11:00 ................Celebrity Come Dine with Me 12:05 ................Celebrity Come Dine with Me 13:40........... French Collection 14:40....................... Countdown 15:30 ...............Deal or No Deal 16:30 ...............................Draw it! 17:00.....................Four in a Bed 17:30...... Come Dine with Me 18:00.............The Simpsons 18:30................... Hollyoaks 19:00......... Channel 4 News 20:00............. The Supervet 21:00... 24 Hours in A and E 22:00.....................Derek CW choice 22:30.......Cardinal Burns CW choice 23:35 ................Barclaycard Mercury Prize Sessions

06:00..................... Children’s TV

06:00 ........................Emmerdale

06:15 ......... Total Wipeout USA

08:45....... Bananas in Pyjamas

06:25........... Coronation Street

07:00 .....MasterChef Australia

08:55......... Milkshake Monkey

06:55..... You’ve Been Framed!

08:00 .......... Beverly Hills Pawn

09:00........................ Tickety Toc

08:30 .......... Beverly Hills Pawn

09:15.............. The Wright Stuff

07:45......................... The Jeremy Kyle Show USA

11:10......... Police Interceptors

08:30...................... Dinner Date

10:00................................ The Bill

12:10 .........5 News Lunchtime

09:30 ..... The Real Housewives of Orange County

12:15 ............ Cowboy Builders 13:15 .............Home and Away 13:45 ...................... Neighbours 14:15.......... NCIS: Los Angeles 15:15 .......... Next Stop Murder 17:00 .......................5 News at 5 17:30 ...................... Neighbours

15:00 .............Stargate Atlantis 16:00 ...........................Futurama 17:00 .................. The Simpsons 17:30 ...........................Futurama 18:00 ...................Futurama 18:30............ The Simpsons 19:00............ The Simpsons 19:30............ The Simpsons 21:00 .......................24: Live Another Day 22:00 ....The Ones to Watch 23:00..... NCIS: Los Angeles

13:30..... You’ve Been Framed!

13:30 ................... Bondi Rescue 14:00 ........ Extreme Makeover: Home Edition 15:00 ..................Choccywoccydoodah: Starstruck

19:00 .......... The Nightmare Neighbour Next Door

16:00 ..................Choccywoccydoodah: Starstruck

17:00 ..........Britain’s Got Talent

17:00....Booze Patrol Australia

18:30.... Britain’s Got Talent

18:00 .............Bondi Rescue

19:00... You’ve Been Framed!

19:00..... Beverly Hills Pawn

20:00...The Nutty Professor

20:00.......... Almost Human

20:00 ... Marchioness: Party Boat Disaster Minute by Minute 21:00........................... NCIS 22:00................. Jack Taylor: The Priest 23:45................ Cricket on 5

22:00 ............... Britain’s Got More Talent 23:00 ...........Celebrity Juice 23:50... Two and a Half Men

21:00 ........................ Grimm 22:00....................... Believe 23:00................. Beauty and the Beast

07:10 ...............................Red Bull X-Fighters 2013

06:00............. Thirtysomething

08:00 ................................. RSPCA Animal Rescue

08:00...............Storage Hunters

08:00 .......Star Trek: Enterprise

09:00.............. UK Border Force

10:00.......... Lizard Lick Towing

10:00 ........... Sun, Sea and A&E

11:00 .............................Top Gear

11:00 ............My Kitchen Rules

12:00 .........Would I Lie to You?

12:00 ............. CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

12:40 .......................................... QI

14:00 ................Criminal Minds

14:00 ..............Storage Hunters

16:00............ My Kitchen Rules

15:00 ................ Sin City Motors

17:00................................. RSPCA Animal Rescue

15:00............................. Star Trek: Enterprise

16:00............................. Top Gear

16:00 ............... Without a Trace

17:00 .........Would I Lie to You?

17:00....................... Blue Bloods

17:40 .......................................... QI

18:00......................... House

18:20 .............Only Connect

19:00 .........................House

19:00 ................ Traffic Cops

20:00.................... God Save the Queens

08:00 ...........................Futurama

13:00 .......... NCIS: Los Angeles

13:00 ...........Coronation Street

13:00 ................... Bondi Rescue

14:50 .. The Jeremy Kyle Show

07:00 .............Stargate Atlantis

10:00 ................... Hawaii Five-0

12:30 ........................Emmerdale

12:00 ...................... Who Do You Think You Are? USA

18:30 ......... 5 News Tonight

07:00 ........Nothing to Declare

09:30 ...........................Futurama

11:30.................. The Millionaire Matchmaker

11:00......................... The Glades

18:00........ Home and Away

06:00 .............Motorway Patrol

09:00 ...........................Futurama

10:30 ....Dinner Date Australia

09:00................................ The Bill

14:00.................. The Millionaire Matchmaker

06:00 ..................Gadget Geeks

08:30 ...........................Futurama

28th

18:00.... Nothing to Declare 19:00 ...... My Kitchen Rules 20:00............... Chicago Fire 21:00......................... Bones 22:00 ........ Grey’s Anatomy 23:00 ............. Trying Again 23:30 ...............The Moodys

09:00................ Sin City Motors

13:20 ................... Only Connect

20:00 .... Lizard Lick Towing

07:00 .......................Blue Bloods 09:00 ............... Without a Trace 10:00 .......................Blue Bloods 11:00 ................... Stargate SG-1 12:00 ............... Without a Trace 13:00 ..................................House 14:00 ..................................House

21:00.......... Have I Got a Bit More News for You

21:00................... Mr Sloane

22:00 .................. Room 101

23:00............. The Sopranos

22:00.................... Mad Men

May 06:00 ........................... Switched 06:25 ..................................90210 07:10......................... Ugly Betty 08:00........................... Charmed 09:00 .............Made in Chelsea 10:00 ................ Rude(Ish) Tube 11:00 ........................... Charmed 12:00 ... Rules of Engagement 12:30.......................... Hollyoaks 13:00 .......................... How I Met Your Mother 14:00 .....The Big Bang Theory 15:00... Rules of Engagement 16:00 ................ Rude(Ish) Tube 17:00 .......................... How I Met Your Mother 18:00 ....................... The Big Bang Theory 19:00................... Hollyoaks 19:30 ................... Youngers 20:00 ...................How I Met Your Mother 20:30........................ The Big Bang Theory 21:00 ........... The Tomorrow People 22:00.................. Rude Tube

06:00...................Good Morning Sports Fans 07:00 ..................Good Morning Sports Fans 08:00................. Good Morning Sports Fans 10:00 ...........Carl Froch: Behind the Ropes 13:30 ...........Carl Froch: Behind the Ropes 14:00..................... Ellery Hanley Interviews Frank Bruno 16:00 ..............Ringside Special 17:00............... Sporting Greats 17:30 ...........Carl Froch: Behind the Ropes 19:00 ........................Boxing 19:30...................... Football 22:00........................ Boxing 23:30.........................Boxing

33 CW

W C choice

Derek, Channel 4, 22:00

Derek goes on a date with a girl from a dating website. He’s excited but worried about his dad’s health. True to form Geoff nearly ruins things for Derek, but Kev stands up to him.

Cardinal Burns Channel 4, 22:30

Comedy award-winning double act Seb Cardinal and Dustin Demri-Burns conclude their second series in a double bill featuring brand new characters and popular favourites. In the penultimate show, office tedium is destroyed with a spiked birthday cake, airline pilots Malcolm and Geoff struggle to get to grips with the intercom system, Young Dreams’ Rachel channels her inner Ellie Goulding until Yumi upstages her at an open mic night, while music festival stewards Bert and Moon have cruel intentions.


CW 34

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TV Guide

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

Thursday Thursday 09:15 .......................Fake Britain

06:05 ...................Homes Under the Hammer

06:00 ................. Good Morning Britain

10:00 ................... Homes Under the Hammer

07:05 .... Caught Red Handed

08:30 ..............................Lorraine

07:35 ..............Call the Council

11:00 ..... Caught Red Handed

08:20............... Don’t Get Done, Get Dom

09:25 ........................ The Jeremy Kyle Show

06:00 ............................Breakfast

11:30 ...............Call the Council 12:15 ....................Bargain Hunt 13:00 ............BBC News at One 13:45 .............................. Doctors 14:15 ............................. The Link 15:00 ............................Escape to the Country 15:30 .............. The Hairy Bikers’ Best of British 16:30 ........ Antiques Road Trip 17:15 ............................ Pointless 18:00 ........ BBC News at Six 19:00 ...........The One Show 19:30 ................ EastEnders 20:00 ........Food Inspectors 21:00.... From There to Here Drama telling the story of two Manchester families whose lives are brought together following a terrible event. May 1997. As election fever hits Britain, Daniel’s double life is beginning to catch up with him. On one side of Manchester, his wife Claire proudly watches their eldest daughter stand as a Labour candidate and on the other side, Joanne is in labour with his new daughter. Robbo rebuilds his club.

22:00 ....... BBC News at Ten

W C choice

22:35............Question Time

09:05................... Escape to the Continent

10:30 .................... This Morning 11:25 ............................ITV News

10:05..................... First Time on the Front Line

11:30 .................... This Morning

10:35...........................HARDtalk

13:30 .............................ITV News and Weather

11:00 .........................BBC News 11:30............ BBC World News 12:00 ................. Hans Christian Andersen 13:50 ............ Raymond Blanc’s Kitchen Secrets 14:20 .................... The Pallisers 15:15 ............ Cash in the Attic 15:45 ................... Big Cat Diary 16:15 ...Nature’s Great Events 17:15 ............................... Flog It!

12:30 .................. Loose Women

14:00.................. Jo Frost Family Matters 15:00 .........................Dickinson’s Real Deal 16:00....................... Ejector Seat 17:00 ..............................The Paul O’Grady Show 18:00 .................... ITV News London

18:00 ..................Eggheads

18:30.............. ITV News and Weather

18:30.....Celebrity Antiques Road Trip

19:00................. Emmerdale

19:30... Great British Menu 20:00............. Springwatch 21:00............. Springwatch

19:30....................... Britain’s Got Talent 21:00...... Coronation Street

21:30....................... Britain’s 21:30.....Burning Desire: W C Got Talent The Seduction choice 22:00 ................ ITV News at of Smoking Ten and Weather 22:30................ Newsnight 23:20 ........ Welcome to Rio

22:35...............Fearne and...

Burning Desire: The Seduction of Smoking BBC2, 21:30 Documentary exploring attitudes to cigarettes and smoking. Cigarettes are the most lethal consumer product on the planet. Yet, despite all the health warnings and decades of ever increasing government regulation, the burning desire for tobacco is as strong as ever. Peter Taylor travels to Australia to look at the industry’s last-ditch battle to prevent plain packaging and is given rare access to the world’s second-biggest tobacco company to see why thousands of young people around the world are seduced by smoking every day.


www.canarianweekly.com

TV Guide

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

Thursday Thursday 29th May 06:00 ...................... Countdown

06:00..................... Children’s TV

06:00........................ Emmerdale

06:15......... Total Wipeout USA

06:00 ........................... Switched

06:45 ............ According to Jim

09:00......................... Tickety Toc

06:25 ...........Coronation Street

07:00..... MasterChef Australia

06:25 ..................................90210

07:10.....3rd Rock from the Sun

09:15 ..............The Wright Stuff

06:55..... You’ve Been Framed!

08:00 .......... Beverly Hills Pawn

07:10......................... Ugly Betty

07:35............... King of Queens

11:10 .........Police Interceptors

08:00........................... Charmed

08:00............. Everybody Loves Raymond

12:10 .........5 News Lunchtime

07:45 ........................ The Jeremy Kyle Show USA

08:30 .......... Beverly Hills Pawn 09:00 ................................The Bill

09:00 .....................................Glee

08:30 ...................... Dinner Date

10:00 .................................. he Bill

10:00 ................ Rude(Ish) Tube

11:00 ........................ The Glades

11:00........................... Charmed 12:00 ... Rules of Engagement 13:00 .......................... How I Met Your Mother

09:00................................. Frasier

12:15 ............. Beware! Cowboy Builders

10:00 ............ Undercover Boss

13:15 .............Home and Away

09:30 ..... The Real Housewives of Orange County

11:00 ...... Come Dine with Me

13:45 ...................... Neighbours

10:30 ....Dinner Date Australia

12:00 ...................... Who Do You Think You Are? USA

12:00...............Channel 4 News

14:15 .................................... NCIS

13:00 ................... Bondi Rescue

12:05 ...... Come Dine with Me

15:15 ............. Mystery Woman: Game Time

11:30 ..................The Millionaire Matchmaker 12:30 ........................Emmerdale

17:00........................5 News at 5

13:00........... Coronation Street

14:00 ........ Extreme Makeover: Home Edition

14:00......The Big Bang Theory

17:30 ...................... Neighbours

13:30..... You’ve Been Framed!

15:00............................ Sky Cops

18:00 ........Home and Away

14:00 ..................The Millionaire Matchmaker

16:00................ Rude(Ish) Tube

16:00 ............................ Sky Cops

17:00 .......................... How I Met Your Mother

13:40 ...........French Collection 14:40 ...................... Countdown 15:30 ...............Deal or No Deal 16:30 ...............................Draw it! 17:00 ....................Four in a Bed 17:30 ...... Come Dine with Me 18:00............ The Simpsons 18:30 .................. Hollyoaks 19:00 ........ Channel 4 News 20:00................. Posh Pawn

18:30.......... 5 News Tonight

14:50...The Jeremy Kyle Show

20:00...............The Spy Who Brought Down Mary Queen of Scots

17:00 ..........Britain’s Got Talent

18:00............. Bondi Rescue

18:30.....Britain’s Got Talent

18:30 .............Bondi Rescue

21:00........ Trauma Doctors

19:00....You’ve Been Framed!

19:00 .... Beverly Hills Pawn

19:30................... How I Met Your Mother

20:00 ................ Wild Target

20:00 ........................ Grimm

20:00....The Big Bang Theory

22:00 ............... Britain’s Got More Talent

21:00 ....................... Believe

20:30....................How I Met Your Mother

23:00 ...........Celebrity Juice

23:00 ................ Cops Uncut

19:00 ... Police Interceptors

21:00......Meet the Police W C Commissioner choice 22:00.................. My Granny the Escort

23:00............... The 16-YearOld Baby

06:00 ..................Gadget Geeks 07:00 .............Stargate Atlantis

06:00 .............Motorway Patrol

08:00 ...........................Futurama

07:00........ Nothing to Declare

08:30 ...........................Futurama

08:00... RSPCA Animal Rescue

09:00 ...........................Futurama

09:00.............. UK Border Force

10:00 ................... Hawaii Five-0

10:00 ........... Sun, Sea and A&E

11:00 ................... Hawaii Five-0

11:00 ............My Kitchen Rules

12:00 .........Would I Lie to You?

13:00.......... NCIS: Los Angeles

12:40 .......................................... QI

15:00 .............Stargate Atlantis

12:00 ............. CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

13:20 ................... Only Connect

16:00 ...........................Futurama

14:00 ................Criminal Minds

14:00 ....................... Traffic Cops

17:00.................. The Simpsons

16:00 ............My Kitchen Rules

15:00 .............................Top Gear

17:30 ...........................Futurama

17:00... RSPCA Animal Rescue

17:00 .........Would I Lie to You?

18:00 ...................Futurama

18:00.... Nothing to Declare

17:40 .......................................... QI

18:30 ............The Simpsons

19:00...... My Kitchen Rules

18:20............. Only Connect

19:00 ............The Simpsons

20:00 ........ Obese: A Year to Save My Life USA

19:00 ................Man v Food

21:00 ............. Trying Again

21:00 ...........................QI XL

21:00 ............... Intelligence

15:00... Rules of Engagement

17:00.......................Booze Patrol Australia

22:00............. The Man Who Ate Himself to Death

20:00 ..... NCIS: Los Angeles

13:30................... Bondi Rescue

12:30 ...........................Hollyoaks

06:30 .............Motorway Patrol

22:00 .................Revolution

21:30 ...............The Moodys

23:00 ...........................NCIS: Los Angeles

23:05 .........................Bones

22:05 ................. CSI: Miami

23:50 ..................... Viral Tap

07:10 ...............................Red Bull X-Fighters 2013 08:00............................. Top Gear 09:00....................... Traffic Cops 10:00.......... Lizard Lick Towing 11:00............................. Top Gear

22:00 .......... Almost Human

18:00....The Big Bang Theory 19:00................... Hollyoaks

21:00.....Brooklyn Nine-Nine

23:30 ................ Traffic Cops

21:30...............2 Broke Girls

06:00............. Thirtysomething

06:00 ..................Good Morning Sports Fans

07:00....................... Blue Bloods 08:00 .............................Star Trek: Enterprise 09:00................ Without a Trace 10:00 .......................Blue Bloods 11:00 ................... Stargate SG-1 12:00 ............... Without a Trace 13:00 ..................................House

07:00 ..................Good Morning Sports Fans 08:00 ..................Good Morning Sports Fans 10:00 ................ George Groves: Behind the Ropes 13:00 ...............Sporting Greats

14:00 ..................................House

13:30 ................ George Groves: Behind the Ropes

15:00 .............................Star Trek: Enterprise

14:00 ..............Sporting Heroes

16:00 ............... Without a Trace

17:00 ...............Sporting Greats

17:00 .......................Blue Bloods

16:00 ..............Ringside Special

18:00......................... House

18:00 ..........George Groves: Behind the Ropes

19:00 .........................House

18:30 .....................Ringside

22:00 ..........Mock the Week

20:00 ................. The British

19:30............ Rugby League

22:40 ........Russell Howard’s Good News Extra

21:00......... Penny Dreadful

22:15 .....................Ringside

22:05.................... Magnolia

23:15 ........Ringside Special

20:00 ................ Traffic Cops

35 CW

W C choice

Meet the Police Commissioner Channel 4, 21:00

This Cutting Edge documentary explores the surreal world of Ann Barnes, Police and Crime Commissioner for Kent. In 2012, elections to appoint 41 Police and Crime Commissioners were described as the biggest shake-up to policing for 50 years and cost £75 million, but resulted in the lowest voter turnout since World War II. The low turnout meant that some obscure and ‘eccentric’ candidates were voted in. Initially, Ann railed against the introduction of PCCs, describing the policy as ‘naïve and disastrous’ and ‘a wilful waste of money’, before deciding to stand as one herself. She’s had a rocky first year in office, best known for a Twitter-based scandal, her official presidential-style camper van ‘Ann Force 1’ and her distinctive anti-politics style of connecting with people. But do the public see her as an independent breath of fresh air, who will roll her sleeves up to get things done, or a gaffe-prone amateur who stands no chance in the face of a massive cuts to police funding?


CW 36

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Entertainment

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

You should have stayed! DON’T worry, Leon Cormack is not leaving the Island! The headline is the name of his new single, and Oasis Fm played it first!

The hook-line dance track, on which Leon, his brother Aaron and Scott Henderson, all provide vocals, has all the makings of a chart hit. The Cormack brothers have been involved in the music business at record-label level for some time now, with one of their songs, Better Man, featuring Carlos Kin & Alexei, signed by Sony. This new project has involved Scott, who is resident at Leonardos Bar in Las Americas and sings in the duo Reloaded.

THESE two bars display Fun Pub on their signs and they deliver this commodity by the bucket-load. The fun starts with the staff who, in both venues, are encouraged by the owners to have a good time with the customers. There are no strict rules and, at times, when an artiste like Tony Kay gets most of the audience in an immense conga line, you will always find the staff getting involved in the fun.

THE BLUES BROTHERS

He was delighted to be asked to provide vocals on this song, and even more chuffed when he discovered he would be delivering the chorus hook-line - the catchiest part of the song. The whole production has captured the current music-industry trends, which are being re-invented, especially within the dance genre, where Garage and Drum & Bass are beginning to creep back to the

This week, the fun got a little bit cheeky - but it was well received. On Sunday evening at Ye Olde Ocean, the award-winning Mr Sister Show is live on stage at 11pm. Everyone who knows this show will be aware that Sunday he will be performing on ITV’s Britain’s Got Talent. So, I set up the front row with large cards displaying the word YES and asked the audience to hide them until the part of the show which will

more mainstream songs. You Should Have Stayed has all the attributes of a hit, and Leon will be taking this song this summer around the big clubs of Miami, where so many of the dance music glitterati hang out. Don’t forget to listen out for it on Oasis Fm. In fact, stop what you’re doing now and send a private message to Oasis Fm’s Facebook and request it!

be seen on the TV tomorrow. The wind-up went perfectly and, much to the delight of the audience, Mr Sister continued through stifled laughter before pulling it back perfectly by throwing the dirtiest of looks at the one responsible for holding up a card displaying an X. Mr Sister even thanked them at the end of the show for providing extra laughter. I don’t believe he actually realised it was me. My bad!

FOR a long time, musical movies like Grease and Dirty Dancing have played a role in any production show.

Yet there are no touring shows in Tenerife which feature songs from films like the ones mentioned. However, The Blues Brothers film, featuring John Belushi and Dan Akroyd as Jake & Elwood Blues does just that. And we have our own Blues Brothers duo, who tour the Tenerife show bars, and have done successfully for many years. I first saw them in 2000, at the Orlando in Torviscas, back in the day when artistes were doing three shows a night. We all live an easier life nowadays, and live at a slower pace, but I bet we’d all jump at the chance of doing three shows a night again! Paul Price and Mark Wilson have a fabulous chemistry on stage, and take their roles to the highest degree. They involve comedy, audience participation and a playlist of the best songs from the film. And those are the three most important ingredients for a successful show. A double act will always be more engaging for an audience as long as the main show principles are delivered. These two guys are totally relaxed on stage

- and each time they go out on to the boards, they make it feel fresh. The boys enter the stage with the same kind of attitude as their film counterparts, with stone-cold glares through their dark sunglasses. But do remember that it’s all an act. Paul and Mark are just two lads at heart who respect their work and their audience. The best shows on the Island are the ones which involve the audience in some way, and I will never get bored of seeing their

show. They are consistent and, having worked alongside them on dozens of occasions in many venues, I have never seen them fail to win over an audience. They have one of the busy shows touring at the moment, and they have remained in big demand, no matter what time of year. With energy and pace from the word go, this is a show not to be missed. And now the summer is almost upon us, their availability will be diminishing fast. So get ‘em booked!


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Tenerife Loves Karaoke

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

37 CW

Heat 11: Tenerife Loves Karaoke at Clouseaus Bar

Stacey’s TLK dream is alive CLOUSEAUS Bar has supported Tenerife Loves Karaoke since we started the series, back in 2011.

And though Palm Mar is not what you’d call a tourist resort, it is very much a residential area, inhabited by many expats. It reminds many of Las Vegas (honestly), but only because, when travelling towards Palm Mar, it seems as though you’re heading into the desert. Then, suddenly, there it is! However, it wasn’t long before the team had set up, registered all the singers and got the competition underway. The judging is the same for every heat, with 50 points awarded over three categories. The most important is, obviously, vocal ability, which accounts for 30 all-important points presentation and interpretation, each worth 10 points, take care of the rest. Judges mark the singers according to their own opinion - and they work independently and not as a team. The Palm Mar panel comprised two of the usual suspects, Jo Rham and Angela Mowberry, and representing the bar were Tenerife singer Daren Clarke and Patricia Holmforth, local resident and regular patron at Clouseaus. The heat saw the re-

turn of last year’s grand finalist, Bobby Webber, who was attempting to secure a final place again. And also returning from previous heats were Kelly Regan and Stacey Tippett. All the other singers were in the spotlight for the first time, but for everyone competing, the nerves were tingling. Putting yourself on a stage to be judged by relative strangers takes a lot of bravado, and even more so if you are returning to try again. The song choices were all good and, for the first time this season, we had an Adele song. After the first round of singing and during a short interval in the proceedings, the second round began with two impromptu performances. The first came from seasoned pro Darren, who wowed the audience with a flawless version of Impossible Dream, by Luther Vandross. And then, to everyone’s surprise, John Zammit, sales manager at Emcan Media - normally as mild-mannered as Henry the janitor, from Honk Kong Fooey - leapt into action with an energetic performance of McFly’s Five Colours In Her Hair. Then it was back to business, and round two featured the three top singers, who were a little less tense this time with, maybe, a little Dutch

courage. Their songs were wide and varied, with Stacey Tippett coming out on top after performing Adele’s Someone Like You and If I Can Dream, a song recorded by Elvis originally but also released prior to the 2010 World Cup by Terry Venables. Stacey gave her own twist to the number with her powerful voice and sought out harmony lines, which made it sound brand new. So another girl has joined the rest of the grand finalists - there are now nine females

and two males. And with just heats remaining, there isn’t long for the guys to man-up and enter. The next heat is at The Terrace Bar on Amarilla Golf, tonight (Friday), and you can enter direct at the venue or by calling 902 232 102 during office hours. All entrants must be registered by 9.30pm at the venue. Tonight’s heat will be hosted by Oasis Dj and Canarian Weekly editor Roscoe. Jamie Drew will return for the final heat at Leonardos next Friday (30th May).

ARTIST SONG TITLE Alicia Keys It’s On Again Bombay Bicycle Club Feel Calvin Harris Summer Cash Cash Take Me Home Clean Bandit & Sharna Bass Extraordinary Coldplay A Sky Full of Stars DJ Cassidy Calling all Hearts Ed Sheeran Sing Foxes Holding Onto Heaven Indiana Solo Dancing Jason Derulo Stupid Love Jess Glynne Home John Legend All Of Me John Martin Anywhere for You Justin Timberlake Not a Bad Thing Katy Perry Birthday Kiesza Hideaway Lady Gaga G.U.Y. Lana del Rey West Coast Lily Allen Our Time Mr. Probz Waves Nick Mulvey Meet Me There One Direction You & I Paloma Faith Only Love can Hurt Like This Passenger Scare Away the Dark Pharrell Williams Marily Monroe Prides The Seeds You Sow Rita Ora I Will Never Let you Down Sam Smith Stay With Me Second City I Wanna Feel Sigma Nobody To Love The 1975 Robbers The Chainsmokers #Selfie The Horrors So Now You Know Tiesto ft. Matthew Koma Wasted Tove Lo Stay High Twin Atlantic Heart and Soul You Me at Six Cold Night


CW 38

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Home

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

You’re in safe hands with Liberty Seguros YOU’VE worked hard to build a solid financial footing for you and your family - and you want to be sure everything is protected.

Accidents and disasters can and do happen, and if you aren’t adequately insured, it could leave you in financial ruin. You need insurance to protect your life, your ability to earn income, and to keep a roof over your head. With Liberty Seguros you will always be in safe hands. With over 150,000 international clients, Liberty Seguros is the leading expat insurance provider in Spain, with a wide range of products to protect all that really matters. Have you bought a

home in Tenerife or mainland Spain? Liberty Seguros allows you to choose from three levels of protection for your home: Basic, Plus and Premium. All three options include Home assistance, 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, with just a simple telephone call, and you can pay by instalments if you want.

Also, all the home policies come with the DIY service, IT support and legal assistance. The DIY service allows you to forget about those small household tasks. Once a year, during weekdays, you can ask for a professional to handle jobs such as plumbing, installing bath accessories, curtains and even sealing

joints in baths or sinks, assembling furniture, replacing power outlets and hanging pictures on walls - among other issues for up to three hours’ labour. Additionally, Liberty Home offers computer and technology support in person, or over the phone, for queries relating to home equipment such as computers, GPS

and digital cameras. It also includes legal advice on any matter relating to internet use or e-commerce. Terms and conditions apply. Optional covers are also available, such as legal defence for landlords in dispute with tenants over defaulted rental payments, or damage caused to the property.

The Basic protection guarantees essential home coverage at an affordable price. Alternatively, the Plus option also covers the costs of rebuilding or replanting a garden and covers 100% of the cost of glass and ceramic household appliances, among others. And the Premium protection goes that little bit extra. As part of its significant improvement, it covers costs resulting from theft outside the home, solar-panel breakage and damage to the property caused by adjacent building work. Go to www.libertyexpatriates.es now for the name of your nearest Liberty Seguros broker, who can give you expert advice on which cover best suits your family’s needs in a friendly, faceto-face environment and speak in your own language.


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Garden

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

39 CW

Tulip tree’s a splash hit! THE African Tulip Tree (Spathodea campanulata), extravagant in every way, is known throughout the world as one of the most beautiful of all flowering varieties.

It is grown in tropical climates, is native to Africa, and, as such, is sensitive to cold. And, in the past 20 years, this “king of flowering trees” has become a popular landscape tree in any country where the sun shines throughout. Hello, Tenerife! The Tulip Tree is a member of the bignonia or trumpet-vine plant family (Bignoniaceae). It is also known as a Tangerine Beauty and is the only species in its genus. In its native habitat (around Africa’s Lake Victoria), and as a cultivated ornamental tree in tropical climates, it is a large evergreen tree, growing as high at

50ft and or more, with flowers throughout the year. It can actually thrive in cooler climates (forget the UK), but it grows to about half the size, losing its leaves during winter and early spring. Its tropical-looking foliage comprises 18in-long, leaves with

multiple oval leaflets, each four to six inches long. New leaves emerge as a bronzy colour, becoming dark green above and paler beneath. But flowering is quite dramatic, with football-sized flower clusters produced at the ends of every branch

during warm weather. These unusual clusters are composed of several velvety-brown, clawlike buds which split open vertically as the trumpet-shaped flowers emerge in succession. The mature flowers are, typically, an intense red/orange colour, and there is also a

golden yellow-flowered selection. And, as kids may know, the blossoms are not just pretty but can be great fun as well. That’s because every flower bud is pressurised with a watery nectar as it expands. It means that if the buds are squeezed just

right, they make an effective water pistol that can be accurate up to 10ft. Crazy, but true! As a bonus (for adults. anyway), the frilly flowers make colourful, hanky-like pocket ornaments when fully open, which could lead to an interesting conversational piece.

Pin down this Donkey’s Tail! THE Donkey’s Tail (Sedum morganianum) is a popular and easyto-grow trailing succulent, with rows of fleshy, dropped-shaped leaves.

It has a multitude of names, including “Lamb’s Tail”, “Burro’s Tail”, or Horse’s Tail”, and you might see closely-related Sedum carrying any of these names. The most exceptional examples can be seen in hanging baskets outside a couple of backstreet homes in Las Galletas, near the front - and they really are a

gobsmacking sight to see! These plants can also be used as trailers in small pots. A mature specimen could drop up to two-feet, with dozens of grey-green, plump leaves lined up like droplets. Flowers emerge readily in late summer, in hanging clusters of small blossoms in red, yellow or white. They relish full sunlight, which means it’s a perfect plant for Tenerife, and flourishes indoors or out. Not surprisingly, they love being watered every day! But do make sure the drainage is spot-on and, even over here, you can reduce the watering during the winter months. Especially after the win-

ter we’ve just endured! The Donkey’s Tail is one of several hundred sedum species within the crassulaceae genre of succulents, but only a few of them are trailing. Donkey’s Tails are pretty forgiving plants, and they really don’t mind if you forget to water them on the odd occasion. But if you really want your plant to thrive, make sure to provide strong light, fertiliser during the growing season, and adequate moisture as well. Too often, they are left to fend for themselves … simply, because they can! But with a little effort, this is a remarkable specimen, as demonstrated by the Las Galletas display.


CW 40

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Health and Beauty

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

Worry for women bingers

By Val Sainsbury BINGE -DRINKING is more harmful than previously thought … especially for women.

New research suggests that drinking four glasses of wine in a short time can cause bugs to leak from the gut, increasing levels of toxins in the blood. The findings are especially alarming in Britain, where one adult in four is a binge drinker more than in any other country in Europe. It has commonly been felt hat heavy alcohol consumption affects the body over a long period of time – especially in men. But the latest research, reported by the PLOS ONE journal, showed the dangerous bacteria, called endotoxins, produced immune cells involved in fever, inflammation and tissue destruction. Professor Gyongyi Szabo, of the Univer-

sity of Massachusetts, said: “We found a single alcohol binge can elicit an immune response, potentially impacting the health of an otherwise healthy individual. “Our observations suggest that an alcohol binge is more dangerous than previously thought.” Binge-drinking is de-

fined as consuming five or more drinks for men, or four or more drinks for women, in about two hours, depending on body weight. It is known to pose safety risks associated with car crashes and accidents, and to damage the liver and other organs if the behaviour is indulged in regularly.

But Professor Szabo and colleagues now say there is evidence that just one heavy session is enough to damage a person’s health causing extremes, such as bacterial leakage from the gut into the blood stream. To assess the impact of binge drinking, 11 men and 14 women were given enough alcohol to

raise their blood alcohol levels above the US driving limit within an hour. Blood samples were then taken every 30 minutes for four hours, and again 24 hours later. The researchers found that the alcohol resulted in a rapid increase in endotoxin levels in the blood. These chemicals are

contained in the cell wall of certain bacteria, which are released when the cell is destroyed. There was also evidence of bacterial DNA in the bloodstream, showing bugs had permeated the gut. And. compared with men, women had higher blood-alcohol levels and circulating endotoxin levels.

Hope for Alzheimer victims AN anti-depressant drug could be used to slow the onset of Alzheimer’s disease, according to scientists in the States. Research into 23 peo-

ple, and transgenic mice, found citalopram hampered a protein which helps to build destructive plaques in the brains of Alzheimer’s patients. The US scientists have high hopes that the study could help prevent the disease. And experts, who

tipped their hats and said the study was “interesting”, added that using an approved drug could be beneficial. Alzheimer’s disease is the most common cause of dementia, affecting around 496,000 people in the UK. It affects the brain through protein plaques and tangles, which lead to the death of brain cells, and a shortage of chemicals important for transmitting messages. Symptoms include loss of memory, mood changes, and problems with communication and reasoning. Researchers at the University of Pennsylvania and Washington University School of Medicine carried out the study between 2012 and 2014. They bred mice with Alzheimer’s disease and looked at the levels of the peptide (pro-

tein component) in the brain. This cluster in plaques which, alongside the protein, are thought to trigger Alzheimer’s. After giving the mice citalopram, the level of peptide fell by 25%, compared with the control group, with no anti-depressant. And after two months of anti-depressants, the growth of new plaques was reduced, and existing plaques did not grow any further, according to the study. But it was noted that the drug could not cause existing plaques to shrink, or decrease in number. The 23 people used in the study were aged between 18 and 50 and were “healthy”. They were given a single dose of citalopram, and the levels of AB in their cerebrospinal fluid was monitored.

Researchers said AB levels dropped by 38% in the 37-hour period after treatment, compared with a placebo test. Lead author Dr Yvette Sheline, at the University of Pennsylvania, said the anti-depressants worked by “clipping” the AB molecules so they could not function properly. She added: “We predicted the results, but they were still very exciting.” Dr Sheline stressed that the study was a “proof of concept” study - hence the small number of people without Alzheimer’s. But she did say that if the results were successful, they could be used to slow the progression of the disease 10 to 15 years before it could, typically, become apparent. The doctor added: “I am eager to get on to the next study, where

we will look at whether the effect can be sustained.” She said that a “big study”, spanning several years, would look at the effectiveness of the drug in people compared with a placebo. Dr James Pickett, head of research at the Alzheimer0s Society, said: “This is an interesting paper. Taking a study from mice to humans can be problematic - but they have done it.” “A commonly-used drug like this can get studies to the treatment stage quicker, and can mean they are cheaper to develop.” But he also said the sample size was small, and warned that he researchers had not carried out the study on people with Alzheimer’s, or even people over the age of 50, when the disease was most prevalent.


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Health and Fashion

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

BIG IS BEAUTIFUL!

By Carl from Robot

IF you want volume in your hair, the best way to go is with curls … and I’m not talking nightmare perms.

There are ways to curl your hair temporarily. In fact, there are many ways to give your hair movement and bounce, even if it’s just for a night out. You can change your look totally, even with shorter hair, and one of the best ways is with a good pair of ceramic tongs. They heat up superfast and will give your hair durable curls and waves that last. But as with all curling methods, do NOT start on freshly-washed hair. In fact, hair always curls better if you do it the day after you’ve washed it, so don’t ever

try to curl hair after you have straightened it with an iron. You actually need to wash it again before you try to do this. On dry hair, first spritz with a protection spray - and don’t overdo the conditioner beforehand because this will make the hair too soft and the curls will fall. Take medium sections of your hair to produce curls, and larger sections for waves. Hold the curler at the roots first, passing to the ends, and then curl back up to the scalp. Hold there for around five seconds and slowly release. And this will give you a smooth, welldefined curl. After completing the whole head, it’s your choice: separate the curls with fingers to give a bouncy, fuller look, or drag your fingers and a wide brush through to create waves. Either way, if done correctly, this look can last all night long if you’re going out.

If you want more movement in your hair, heated rollers are the best and, as with curling, start on unwashed hair to give more lasting results, After setting the whole head, leave to cool for around 20 minutes to “set” the curls in place. Carefully, remove the curlers and let the hair fall. Then, shake your head upside down and spray with a gel to hold those curls. This gives a more natural wave, rather than a curl, and it can also be used on shorter hair to give height and volume. Setting damp hair on some inexpensive, plastic rollers will give you a similar look, too, but it takes a lot longer to dry. Whatever method you choose, remember not to over-condition beforehand, don’t curl freshly-washed hair and use plenty of mousse and gel spray to really lock in those curls. One thing I try to do in the salon is over-curl the hair. That’s because, in the humidity we have here, curls drop out so easily. So if you want those tresses to last all night, take a smaller section on a small-barrelled curling iron. Those big curls look great as you leave the salon, but they won’t last more than a few hours if your hair is longer and heavy. If you can’t manage to achieve this look at home, ask your stylist to run through it with you in the salon. Then you’ll always have chairworthy hair on your big night out!

41 CW

Millican is dressed - to please herself! By Ruth Benson LAST Sunday saw the annual BAFTA awards and one dress in particular caused a lot of media attention.

No it wasn’t a Hollywood actress baring all, or a malfunction. It was Sarah Millican’s John Lewis dress, which she also wore at last year’s BAFTAS. Happily, there has been nothing but praise for the comedienne as she tore down critics and stood up for “normal” women. Sarah was originally described as “trolllike” in her choice of outfit, but she hit back at critics with an article in the Radio Times headlined Don’t judge me by my dress. She explains why she chose the high-street store over designer outfits, saying: “I felt wonderful in that dress. And surely, isn’t that all that counts?” The other reason she didn’t pick a designer outfit was simply a question of size. As she said: “Fancy designer shops are out for me as I’m a size 18, sometimes 20, and I, therefore, don’t count as a woman to them. “This, I think, is something designers should be looking at. The average woman’s dress size in the UK has gone from a 14 to a 16, and it is predicted this will increase. “The larger lady is a

key market, and I know ladies who do get frustrated as they can only shop in selected stores such as Evans and Wallis, therefore limiting their choice.” With Sarah, it was the abuse she received on Twitter. She was called fat, ugly and, it was claimed, she looked like a Nana. The day after the BAFTAS, some newspapers criticised her outfit. So what did she do? She decided that, should she ever be invited to the BAFTAS again, she would wear the same dress, ‘To

make the point that it doesn’t matter what I wear. That’s not what I’m being judged on”. She then goes on to say that if people ask, “Where did you get that dress?” she will reply: “Oh, it’s just last year’s, pet.” So what did she wear this Sunday? Yes, the same dress! And what she tweeted later after losing out to Ant and Dec for her nominated category was even more apt. “Well I’m glad I didn’t buy a new dress.” Good for her!


CW 42

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Food and Drink

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

Call to ban ‘outlets’ FERNANDO Plasencia, President of the Association of Small and Medium Businesses (Apymevo) in La Orotava, has hit out at the “ethically wrong” manner in which illegal restaurants and bars, or guachinches, are operating.

His criticism comes just a couple of weeks after Tenerife Cabildo waded into the longrunning row. Plasencia, who is bidding to get stronger regulation on the matter, said: “There is a massive difference between what is legal and how some people are operating. “The misuse of the ‘guanchinches’ confuses consumers, and lots of bars and restaurants are exploiting people.” The Cabildo recently

send out letters to some bars and restaurants, asking them to “get their house in order” by bringing their venues up to the required legal standard. However, many have ignored the request. And there are signs that the stakes are getting bigger because Apymevo has joined forces with Asviten (Wine Growers Association Tenerife) - and they plan to make inspections over the coming weeks.

They aim to take complaints to the local town halls, the tourism arm of the Cabildo and wherever else they need to, hoping to get something done about it. They also plan to liaise with Social Security and Labour Inspectorate, claiming there is no “witch hunt”. They insist they want regula-

tion of the sector immediately. Guachinches are small back-street bars, food markets or illegal cafes. The economic crisis has seen more and more of these springing up, and they are proving popular, especially at weekends. Guachinches normally produce cheap, tradi-

tional dishes as well such as carne fiesta, salted fish with black potatoes, fried rabbit meat, chickpeas and bean stews, sardines, mackerel home-made cheese and so on - at affordable prices. This, says Plasencia, is driving legal tax-paying businesses to the wall.


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Food and Drink

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

Gastro Canarias has right recipe!

The I Canary Islands Gastronomy Fair ends tonight (Friday) after a successful first few days.

It opened on Wednesday at the Trade Fairs Centre in Santa Cruz. The popular event is divided into two complementary sections: firstly, the exhibition area with 50 stands, which showcase local produce and wines, and also the 10th edition of the Canary Islands’ Top Chef Regional Champi-

onship. Chefs from 10 islands, who competed for the title, were given a budget of just 30 euros. And they had to source their ingredients from the El Corte Inglés supermarket, in Santa Cruz. There are other contests as well, including themes such as Canary Gourmet Sandwiches, Ham Cutters, Classical Canary Cocktails and Acrobatic Mixology. Other activities include the Chef Fashion Catwalk, in collaboration with Tenerife Fashion and Tenerife Island

Wines, where the public have been sampling a variety of local wines! Also, there is the popular “Gourmet Experience”, in which nine major Canary cooks prepared three lunches, each with a differenttasting menu in an event co-ordinated by the Association of Chefs and Confectioners of the Canary Islands (ACYRE Canarias). The entire event, which has been really well supported, was officially opened by Cabildo President Carlos Alonso (pictured below). He was joined by Cabildo Vice-President Efraín Medina, as well as Ignacio Pintado, manager of the trade fair, and event director José Carlos Marrero. Well-known local chefs

Juan Carlos Clemente and Seve Díaz performed a special cooking demonstration of five Canarian cuisine dishes, which had onlookers licking their lips.. Alonso said: “This event was born in Tenerife and represents Tenerife, an Island that leads the development of gastronomic, promotion-related activities. “We know that our gastronomic sector always has a component of innovation.” Admission to the fair today is just five euros and gives you free access to all spaces, contests and other activities scheduled during the food and drink show. For more details, visit www.salongastronomicodecanarias.com

43 CW


CW 44

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A Senior View & Community News

Our pensioner power!

people are living longer than ever.

By Monica Dyson IT’S a fact that pensioners make up a large percentage of the population - and a testament to modern, medical science that

But it’s not our fault, so don’t take it out on us! We do seem, often, to be penalised for living increasingly long years. Here in the UK, anyway. I don’t think it will be quite the same in the Canary Islands, where pensioners are seen to contribute a great deal to the economy! Pensioners are a pow-

Live Arico news

Helping hand for Harry HARRY came to us when his owners put him out on the street, for which they were denounced by the police.

Can you treat him better? He is eight years old and quite clingy, so he would love a home with no other pets. He looks like a Blue Rhone Cocker Spaniel and is fully vaccinated, sterilised and chipped our adoption fee of 110 euros covers all this. Call Elaine on 678 015 653 to arrange a meeting. Our charity shops

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

Volunteers are needed in one of our charity shops. Contact Siobhan on 630 857 626 for more details. Also, if you have unwanted clothes, cds, dvds, shoes, household items or children’s clothing, give Siobhan a ring. We have shops in Los Cristianos, Calle Revron near Churchills Bar, and San Eugenio, opposite Hotel La Nina by Amandas bar, at the las Carabelas complex. Both shops open from 10-4pm, Monday to Friday, and until 2pm Saturday. The Los Cristianos shop is open on Sundays.

erful force. There are a lot of us, and so politicians should be nice to us! We all have a vote and we’re not afraid to use it! Okay, it may be thought that we don’t contribute much here. Not so! We may not always be buying the updated version of technological gadgetry, like Iphones or tablets, although many of my friends have become enthusiastic silversurfers over the past few years - and even managed to fathom out whatever version of Word they’ve been sold! But we certainly spend plenty on daytrips, holidays, weekend breaks and entries to National Trust properties. Not to mention what we’re forced to spend on fuel to keep warm. Add to that the fact that we keep Marks and Spencer and John Lewis going, and with what we spend on our grandchildren we could pay off the National Debt! I sometimes believe that once we’ve bought them tickets to the cinema or bowling, together with snacks and then a meal afterwards, we could have bought shares in the establishment! Yes, I feel our economic contribution would be missed! So, I do believe that we’ve got the right to protest when we face what might be called an injustice. And that it just what has happened with defiant protesters, who, angered by the recent cuts to concessionary transport, are rallying in my home town of Sheffield and in other parts of South Yorkshire to make their voices heard; not always with the sympathy of fare-paying passengers, I have to say! The protesters have been called “Freedom Riders”, apparently to

stir up memories of the civil rights movement in America because this is about segregation of older and disabled people. The Freedom Riders of America were those who rode interstate buses into the segregated southern United States in 1961 and subsequent years. The first ride, through Virginia, The Carolinas, Georgia, Alabama and Mississippi was to end in New Orleans, where a civil rights protest rally was planned. The idea was to have inter-racial pairs of passengers sitting in adjoining seats and, at least, one black rider sitting up at the front of the bus where seats were reserved for white customers only. During the summer of 1961, the Freedom Riders also campaigned against many other forms of racial discrimination. They sat together in segregated restaurants, lunch counters and hotels. They were brutally attacked by white supremacists, with the approval of the local police. They were extremely brave people, living a life of fear. After a long and hard struggle, bearing in mind that it was back in 1955 when Rosa Parks made her famous protest about the injustice of “whites only” seats on Montgomery buses.

It led to an all-out boycott of that transport system by black commuters, and a new law was passed which denabled black people to sit where they chose on public transport,. White and coloured signs were removed from drinking fountains, toilets and waiting rooms, with lunch counters serving all customers, regardless of race. Protest can be effective, but they can often take a lot of time, and us pensioners don’t always have the luxury of that. But, hopefully in Sheffield, it won’t take as long to get results as many other protests did. When the evil regime of apartheid in South Africa was introduced in 1948, it took until 1994 before it came to an end. And not before 3.5 million nonwhite people had been forcibly removed from their homes and rehoused in segregated areas. And, under the “Separate Amenities Act”, they were forced to endure “blacksonly” benches, buses, hospitals, ambulances, schools, universities, trains and beaches. All their amenities and services were greatly inferior to those enjoyed by the white population. Black revolutionary leaders like Nelson Mandela and Walter Sisulu were imprisoned for up to 30 years in appalling conditions for plotting to overthrow the inhume regime, with white South African activist Joe Slovo sent into exile for 27 years. There were many prominent opponents of apartheid. Pope John Paul II was outspoken in his condemnation, and the coun-

try was subjected to sanctions and boycotts by countries, sportsmen and entertainers all over the world. I never bought South African goods during that time - my small protest! Prominent women activists included Helen Suzman and Britishborn Helen Joseph, who led a march of over 20,000 women to protest against the inhuman “pass” laws - the passes being something carried by non-white people, who could be asked to produce them at any time. The situation in South Africa isn’t ideal, even after apartheid has been eradicated, and it will take a long time to erase the memory and legacies of it. However, its people are free citizens and no longer are grown men referred to as “boy” by white people, who considered themselves superior. So, good luck to the “Freedom Riders” of South Yorkshire, who are following the timehonoured custom of protesting against injustice. Perhaps it is not quite as emotive here as the evils of America and South Africa’s previous segregation laws. But, nevertheless, it is causing a great deal of grief to disabled people. And to pensioners who, again, feel they are being penalised for being old. As Groucho Marx said: “Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. You just have to live long enough!” So let those of us who have managed to get there, keep what few concessions we have, please!


www.canarianweekly.com 23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

Community News

45 CW

Asociación San Juan is 20! The Adeje based Asociación San Juan is celebrating twenty years of working to improve the quality of life for people with physical and mental challenges.

According to the councillor with responsibility for people with special needs, Carmen Rosa González Cabrera, “The Asociación San Juan, along with the Los Olivos Centre for the Disabled are reference points for care and attention for people with different needs in the borough of Adeje and have contributed greatly to improving lives.” The Asociación San Juan, which bases its educational programme on the Waldorf Method, is a centre for curative education and social therapy. The Waldorf Method is one which stresses the role of the imagination in learning and places a strong value on integrating intellectual, practical, and artistic themes, integrating

family, learning and work into the cultural life of the person with learning difficulties or social challenges. It is a method which favours social, cultural and profession integration for adults who have developmental problems and who need special care. According to Fidel Ortega Dueñas, the educative director of the San Juan centre, “the implantation of an education and a way of life which promotes human rights and a level of auto- determination, and the integration of individuals who need special assistance are ideals on which the work of the Asociación San Juan is based and in recent years in collaboration with the regional Canarian government we have been able to offer social and social-health services. To mark the anniversary the association held a number of workshops, and on Monday May 26th there will a theatre performance of “El Principito” in the Adeje Cultural Centre at 7.30pm, entry is free.

Accion del Sol news

Learn all about dogs WE are busy planning our summer holiday programme for children aged between 6-10 years. The first course will run from 28th July to 1st August and the second between 4th and 8th August. The refuge will be open from 8am-4pm and all are welcome. For more information, and to reserve your child’s place, please call 922 778 630. The closing date is 15th July and the youngsters will be involved in many educational and fun activities in a safe environment. Little Ron, pictured admiring the flowers, was recently brought into the refuge and is seeking a new home,. He is just 4½ months old, of mixed breed and, we believe, will grow be a small dog. He is one of our many animals seeking a new home. Each dog is fully inoculated, castrated, mi-

cro-chipped and has a clean bill of health before adoption is permitted, which ensures it has the best possible start. Accion del Sol does not charge for adopting dogs, but a donation towards the upkeep of the refuge will be welcomed. Please call 922 778 630 for more adoption information, or if you would like to help out in any way. Towels and blankets are always needed for the dogs if you have any to spare. The refuge is situated at the Granadilla Industrial Estate, Exit 51 on the TF1, directly next to ITER, the ecological park where the windmills are. It is open to the public on Monday, Tuesday, Thursday and Friday, from 2pm-5pm, and on Saturdays from 1pm4pm. The refuge is closed Wednesdays, Sundays and on public holidays.


CW 46

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Motoring

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

Death of a legend!

By Jav THE death of Sir Jack Brabham, the only man to win the Formula 1 World Championship in a car he designed, will be mourned throughout the Formula 1 fraternity.

The popular Australian passed away on Monday morning at the age of 88 at his home on The Gold Coast. John Arthur Brabham, known to all as Jack, was born in Hurstville, just outside of Sydney, on 2nd April 1926. He left school at 15 to work at a garage and study mechanical engineering, and, even then, he absolutely loved motors - and all the ins and outs of them. And how they functioned! After a spell in the Royal Australian Air Force, Jack started racing in 1948, driving a Midget car he’d built for a friend. He was an instant success and, after climbing Australia’s racing ladder, he moved to Europe to race in 1955. Brabham quickly befriended John Cooper, of Cooper Cars, and made his Formula 1 debut at the British Grand Prix behind the wheel of a Cooper T40. It was not the most memorable of debuts because he was forced to retire with engine trouble. But, far from dissuading him, he graduated in 1958 to become a full-blown F1 driver with Cooper. In the following season, he won the Monaco Grand Prix and then the British GP at Aintree. He clinched his first world title in the most dramatic of circumstances when he ran out of fuel on the final lap of the US GP but pushed his car 800 metres to cross the finish line for fourth place, which was good enough for him to claim the crown. You simply cannot imagine that scenario in today’s high-tempera-

ture world of Formula 1. Brabham went on to claim a second title the next year, thanks to a run of five consecutive victories But that was as far as it went for the Aussie because Cooper’s car for the new 1.5-litre en-

gine formula wasn’t competitive and Brabham scored just three points. Incredibly, he set up his own team in 1962, based on Hook Road in Chessington, Surrey, and the next few years became challenging for the durable driver. At one point he con-

sidered quitting driving to focus on running the team, and in 1964 Dan Gurney brought the Brabham team its first Grand Prix victory. Two years later, the combination of Brabham’s Ron Ta u r a n a c - d e signed BT19 and the potent Repco V8 engine proved hard to beat. At the 1966 French Grand Prix, he became the first driver ever to win a race in a car bearing his own name - and his three subsequent victories landed his third world championship. The following season, Brabham’s strong form continued. But he had to

be content with second spot in the points, having pushed team-mate and new champion Denny Hulme all the way. A couple of barren years followed, but he collected his 14th and last Grand Prix victory in the South African Grand Prix at the start of 1970. He retired from the sport at the end of that season at the age of 44. Brabham and his family retired to a farm in Australia and, though he sold the Brabham team to business partner Ron Tauranac, he remained actively involved in the industry and other engineering businesses, such as aviation. In 1978, Jack Brabham

became the first motorracing champion to receive a knighthood for his services to the sport. He continued to compete in historic events, such as the Goodwood Revival, until the mid2000s, when ill-health prevented him from indulging in his passion. Brabham’s three sons, Geoff, Gary and David, all followed their father into motor-racing and achieved success at international level. And grandsons Matthew and Sam are now competing in single-seater racing. On behalf of the family, Brabham’s youngest son, David, said: “It’s a very sad day for all of us. My father passed away peacefully at home at the age of 88 on Monday morning. “He lived an incredible life, achieving more than anyone would ever dream of, and he will continue to live on through the astounding legacy he leaves behind.” The word “legend” is attributed, unjustly, to many sports people. “But in the case of Sir Jack Brabham, however, it is entirely justified,” said McLaren boss Ron Dennis. “When I started out in Formula 1 in the late 1960s, I worked first for Cooper and then for Brabham. “And even as a callow youth, I could recognise greatness when I saw it, and I’ll always regard it as an honour and a privilege to have worked for Sir Jack. I learned a lot from him, too.”


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Puzzle

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

PRIZE Godoku!

WIN! Tickets for bowling at Megabowl The rules of Godoku are simple - just enter the letters stated below once in each row, column and 3 x 3 square within the puzzle grid. When you have completed it a word will appear.

Email the answer to info@canarianweekly.com before 5pm on Wednesday 28th May and you’ll be in with a chance of winning.

Last Weeks winner (Issue 853): Lorraine Skar Please come up to the OasisFm / Canarian Weekly offices to pick up your prize. You have until 20th June to pick up and use your vouchers.

This week’s letters: A D G H I M N O R This week’s mystery clue: Kelly Parsons’ 2014 medical thriller has this title (9 letters).

D N D R I G R O N I R A D N R H O D I

30-Second Brain Training

What better way to train your brain. Starting at the left with the number provided, work across each of these lines applying the mathematical instructions to your running total. Don´t reach for the calculator - that´s cheating! Write your final answer in the last box of the line. Aim to complete each round in about 30 seconds. Good Luck! Starter Number

1

2

3

24

÷6

+14

x2

6

7

8

9

-7

x9

-33

÷3

2

3

4

+24

5

Answer

Intermediate Starter Number

1

11

x7

-39

x4

6

7

8

9

2

3

-208

2/3 of this

5

4

x7

-109 Answer

+253 ÷7

Advanced Starter Number

29 6

-87

1

+11 x40 7

÷9

-32

÷4

9

8

5

4

x13 +294

3/7 of this Answer

Quick Wordsearch Find the words on: Earthquakes aftershocks aid agencies disaster epicentre faults focal point folds infrastructure magnitude plates richter scale risk rock movement san andreas seismic waves seismometers severe damage shaking shock waves strain energy tsunami

M A Sudoku X...

Just enter the numbers 1 - 9 once in each row, column and 3 x 3 square within the sudoku X puzzle grid. In addition to standard sudoku, the numbers must only occur once in each side of the ‘X’ that is marked on the grid.

4 3 2

3 7 5 8 9 3

1

2 5 9 4 8 6 5 5 6 3

4

Which number should replace the question mark?

30% of this

O A M

9

Making you think...

Beginner

H G

2

47 CW

Last Issue's Answers:

5

Brain Training: Beginner: 57 Intermediate: 128

Advanced: 27

Making you think:

Answer: 9. Multiply numbers in adjacent circles together, then subtract the original numbers, to give the value in the space inbetween.

And 2 normal sudokus for you aswell...

3 2 6

5 1 7 8 9

9 5 1 7

4 7 9

1

2 5 6 9

1 2

8 3

9 4 3 8

6 8 5 7

6 3

5

2 3 7 5 7 4 1

8 9

Godoku:

5 6 3 9 8 7 1 4 2 1 9 2 5 6 4 8 7 3 8 7 4 1 2 3 9 5 6

2

4 8 1 8 6 7 8 6 5 2 9

Sudoku X:

9 1 5 2 7 8 6 3 4 6 4 7 3 1 5 2 9 8 2 3 8 4 9 6 7 1 5 4 8 6 7 5 1 3 2 9 7 5 9 6 3 2 4 8 1 3 2 1 8 4 9 5 6 7

Sudoku: 8 5 4 3 7 2 9 6 1

2 1 4 5 6 3 7 8 9

3 2 7 6 1 9 8 4 5

6 3 7 9 8 4 1 2 5

6 1 9 4 8 5 3 2 7

5 8 9 2 1 7 3 6 4

1 4 6 9 3 8 7 5 2

9 7 6 3 2 8 4 5 1

7 8 2 5 6 4 1 9 3

3 4 2 1 5 9 6 7 8

9 3 5 7 2 1 6 8 4

1 5 8 4 7 6 2 9 3

2 6 3 8 5 7 4 1 9

7 2 3 8 9 1 5 4 6

4 7 1 2 9 6 5 3 8

4 9 5 6 3 2 8 1 7

5 9 8 1 4 3 2 7 6

8 6 1 7 4 5 9 3 2


CW 48

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Information / Free Ads

British Consulate Address: Plaza Weyler, 8, 1º, 38003 Santa Cruz de Tenerife. Public opening hours: Tuesdays & Fridays: 08.30hrs – 13.30hrs Notarial services: Please consult our webpage or call 902 109 356 or alternatively +34 913 342 194 for further information on how to make an appointment. Please note, we are no longer able to provide notarial services without prior appointment. Emergency Assistance: Assistance is available 24hrs a day, 7 days a week by calling us on 902 109 356 or alternatively +34 913 342 194 E-mail: info.consulate@fco. gov.uk Web:http//: ukin spain.fco.gov.uk Cosumer Office Tel: 922 76 16 00 Town Hall Tel: 922 76 16 00 Emergencies Emergency Services (All) Tel: 112

National Police - Tel: 091 Local Police Tel: 092 Ambulance Tel: 061 Fire Brigade Tel: 080 Guardia Civil Tel: 062 Multi-lingual police central office Tel: 902 102 112 Call this number and ask to speak to an English operator to make a report or official complaint. Local Police Tel: 922 75 70 06 Red Cross Emergencies and Ambulances Tel: 922 28 18 00 Information and Blood Bank Tel: 922 28 29 24 International MEDSERVICE Tel: 922 79 05 63 Medical Benefits Agency Tel: (00 44) 191 218 7547 For if you find yourself in medical difficulties whilst on holiday and without the proper holiday insurance.

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014 Pharmacy Information and Locator (24 hours) Tel: 922 28 24 24 Citizen Information Tel: 010 Postal Services Tel: 902 19 71 97 International Operator Tel: 11825 Local Operator Tel: 11818 Tourist Information Tel: 922 60 55 90 Hospitals & Medical Centres (Answering Machine) Tel: 094 Hospital Las Americas, Playa de las Americas Tel: 922 75 00 22 Playa de Las Americas Centro Medicos Del Sur Tel: 922 79 10 00 Candelaria Hospital Tel: 922 60 20 00 Beach Safety Obey the beach warning flags and always supervise children when near water. Red - Strong currents do not swim

Yellow - Strong winds and turbulent sea conditions. Take care. Green - Safe to swim Shopping Most shops open from Mon - Sat 09:00 - 13:00 then 16:00 - 20:00 Some shops may open for just Saturday Morning, and many shops are closed on Sundays and Tourist Offices, Bank Holidays, with the exception of souvenir shops which tend to open 7 days a week. Tourist Offices Tenerife Sur Tourist Office (Main Tourist Office) Tel: 902 00 31 21 Santa Cruz de Tenerife Tel: 922 28 93 94 Santiago de Teide Tel: 922 86 03 48 Costa Adeje Tel: 922 75 06 33 Puerto de la Cruz Tel: 922 38 60 00 El Medano Tel: 922 17 60 02 La Laguna Tel: 922 63 11 94 La Orotava

Canarian Weekly Photo Challenge

Tel: 922 32 30 41 Las Galletas Tel: 922 73 01 33 Los Cristianos Tel: 922 75 71 37 Los Llanos de Aridane Tel: 922 40 18 99 Playa de las Américas Tel: 922 79 76 68 Playa de las Vistas Tel: 922 78 70 11 Tour Operators TUI/ Thomson Tel: 922 77 77 20 Thomas Cook Tel: 922 757 409 Cosmos Tel: 922 793 802 Transport TFS - Tenerife Sur Airport (Reina Sofia) For flights from the Spanish mainland and nearly all scheduled international flights. Telephone numbers: Flight Information 902 404 704 (lines open 24 hours) Airport Information Tel: 922 75 90 00 Tourist Information Tel: 922 392 037

TFN - Tenerife Norte airport (Los Rodeos) For all domestic flights and some scheduled international and mainland services. Telephone numbers: Flight Information Tel: 902 404 704 (lines open 24 hours) General Information Tel: 922 635 800 Buses TITSA is Tenerife´s public bus company. Tel: 922 53 13 00 The ´Bono-Bus´ discount card can be purchased from all TITSA stations and terminals of TITSA and reduces the cost of transport by up to 30%. Radio Taxis Tel: 922 64 11 12 N.B. Taxi cabs display a special SP (Servico Público) licence plate. Arona Taxis Tel: 922 74 75 11 National Ferry Services Fred Olsen Tel: 922 62 82 52

2 large butane gas bottles, 1 full, 1 part full, bargain at 65 euros. 20 Los Palos Golf tickets, 12 euros each. Tel: 693 869 434

This week’s best photo: Raico Rosenberg

Theme: WOW

How to submit your free adverts: PHONE 902 232 102 Email: classified@canarianweekly.com Just pop in the office in Las Chafiras (next to the Golf Shop). Deadline for Free ads is Tuesdays at 4pm. Up to 500 euros only. Metal framed, white furniture: Wall Unit 30 euros. Large glass topped coffee table 15 euros. Small glass topped coffee table 10 euros. Wheeled trolley with glass shelf 15 euros. Two bedside tables with single drawer 15 euros each. Armchair, 25 euros. Contact garth75@hotmail. com. 50 cc scooter, 450 euros. Tel 670 877 158 Double bed settee with covers and bedding. 90 euros. Tel: 634 056 845 1.7 litre gsc electric jug kettle, surplus to requirements. Excellent condition, 10 euros. Tel: 922 733 299 Golf club travelling bag, 10 euros. 1 pair of Dolcis leather black high heeled shoes, 10 euros. One pair of Stretch fabric boots, taupe, both size 8, 10 euros. Heated curler and tongs, 10 euros the pair. Descaling machine, 200 euros. At least 200 books, mysteries, romances, 10 euros. Glass and steel coffee table, 50 euros. Elegant hall table, 40 euros. Canarian ceramic pull-down kitchen light, 25 euros. Two ceiling lights, 25 euros. Two uplighters, still in boxes, the pair 20 euros. Fridge freezer, Beko, white, 175. euros. Tel: 605 740 410

6 kgm clothes drier, as new, 60 euros. Coffee percolator, new, 15 euros. Mixed garden pots, troughs and trays, ceramic and plastic, all for 20 euros. Lexmark 2300, 3 in one printer, with spare cartridge, 40 euros. Buyer collects Tel: 677 760 582 TV unit, fit large TV, glass shelf, good condition only 15 euros. TDT set top box ijoy, 18 month guarantee, remote usb rec, 15 euros (30 on receipt ) Tel: 634 339 913 2 x XL mens, left hand golf gloves, 10 euros each. Grey marl 3 piece suit, jacket and waistcoat, 40L and trousers, 34L, 20 euros. Timberland juumper, XL, 10 euros. Sonnetti combats, 34L, 10 euros. Jane, pink and orange pregnancy sleeping/ feeding cushion, also turns into cushion for baby to lay in, 20 euros. Second hand mens golf shoes, size 11, 20 euros ONO. Events management level 3 course from www.openstudycollege.com, 300 euros including name change. Tel: 637 206 026


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Classified

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

49 CW

Cars/BIKES

Air-conditioning

Property for rent

GOLF DEL SUR - Charming 2-bed bungalow. Fabulous views. Garden. Parking. 750€ monthly. Tel: 627 219 001

Property for SALE or rent

30sq metre retail unit, formerly Hairdressers/ Beauty Parlour at San Blas, Golf del Sur 300€ pcm or 75,000€ ONO for sale. Tel: 0044 (0) 7912-623-999 E-mail: mr.dbetts@hotmail.co.uk

Cars wanted CARS BOUGHT FOR CASH - Offer made once seen, we will come to you. WANTED small cars to medium cars, 4 X 4’s, small vans, people carriers, runners and non runners, accident damaged, etc. ANYTHING CONSIDERED.

Call us now on 678 451 641

For Sale For Sale contents of 2 bed apartment. Letting on long term unfurnished basis so everything is available. As new 46” Samsung TV, new washing machine & dishwasher, microwave, double bed with hard wood headboard, 2 single beds with hard wood (matching) headboard, side cabinets, 2 metal action sofa beds, hardwood lounge/dining furniture, teak patio set, sunbeds and lots of pots, pans, plates etc...

Call: 0044 781 449 5730 or www.golf-apartment.info

Long term car rental from 220 euros per month, full insurance. Tel: 642 756 473

Jobs OPC’S freelance or employed required, OTE 1000 euros p.w, experience essential. Tele-marketers required for Golf del Sur, contract provided, basic + excellent incentives offered. Call 649 575 313 The Rendezvous Restaurant & Bar Bistro in Golf del Sur are looking for a new full time permanent Sous Chef to join the team to help take an already successful kitchen to it’s next level. Candidates should be qualified with excellent technical skills and attention to detail. The ability to work under pressure and as part of a professional team is essential. If you are a creative, talented and committed chef looking for your next career progression this is an exceptional opportunity to join a very successful growing business with excellent working conditions and a full legal contract. Their ideal candidate is likely to be currently employed in a quality kitchen and they accept that they may need to wait for someone to work a reasonable notice period. If you know you have what it takes then applications in the strictest confidence should be made either by email to julielincoln@tenerifegreenbowls.com or by phoning 922 738 683 Resort in South West Tenerife requires a Personal Assistant to the Director / Administration person. Should be hard working, energetic and responsible; computer literate, admin experienced with good communication skills. Mother tongue English and good command of Spanish. Other languages a plus. Full time contract offered. Basic salary, plus incentives. Please send CV to : cvtobereceived@ gmail.com Established Marketing Company in South Tenerife is now expanding and looking for Czech Slovak speaking persons to work with new and old clients speaking on the phone and in person. Must be smart appearance be able to work as a part of a team some computer knowledge required hours 8.30 – 4.00 Monday to Friday basic wage plus commissions please contact Sue 922 714 632 and send C.V. to suecampbell@regencyresorts.com

Antiques ALADDINS CAVE. Antiques & Vintage Goods bought & sold Tel: 922 720 493


CW 50

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Service Point

Blinds

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

Construction (cont.)

Garden Furniture

Health & Beauty

Cars

www.fitnesswithdebbie.com Tel: 664 576 779

Insurance

Chiropodist Ann Malpass M.A.F.H.P. M.C.F.H.P. Qualified Chiropodist. All your foot care needs solved in the comfort of your own home/hotel. Tel 625 799 570 Elaine Watson Jones MSSCh MBChA - making happy feet between El Medano and Los Gigantes for 18 years. Tel: 608 029 790

Cleaning

Kitchens & bathrooms

Counsellor Feeling depressed, anxious, low? Bacp qualified professional counsellor seeing clients in a private specialist medical centre. Many years experience in UK and qualified to degree level. South Tenerife. Call (+34) 618175048

Elite Cleaning Services is an established cleaning company who can provide a professional cleaning service for Apartments, Villas and Offices. Call us today on 922 789 795 or 696 922 597.

Colin Taylor – Renovations & Maintenance, Bathrooms, Kitchens, Tiling, Plumbing etc. (e.g. complete bathroom & kitchen refurbishments, including all materials & labour from under 2000 euros) Tel 661 081 843 for quotation.

Lawyers

Electrician

Computers

Telephone: 922 736 728 E-mail: Computer Service Provider BT Authorised Dealer Dell Registered Partner

info@act-tenerife.com

Web:

Flowers Massage

www.act-tenerife.com

Visiting massage for tensed up ladies only. Call Rocky 625 832 848

Construction

Mechanics

Fly Screens


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Service Point

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

Patio Doors & Windows

Pool tables

security (cont.)

Printing

Translation

51 CW

Removals UNIVERSAL EXPORTS S.L. PROFESSIONAL REMOVALS TO AND FROM THE U.K. Email: info@removals-tenerife.com Transport Licence: No. 11572932 C.I.F. No. B38820395 Tel: 922 720 711

repairs Personal ServiceS SISSY LOS CRISTIANOS SLIM, SEXY, DOMINATING GOODLOOKING, PRIVATE APARTMENT, CALL : 634 273 126.

TENERIFE TRANSLATION SERVICES: Legally registered with over 25 years experience. Official, Medical, Notary, Wills, Utilities, Probate, Pensions, car paperwork and much more. Professionalism and confidentiality guaranteed. Transport available. Call Tracey on 666 857 991 or email on info@tenerifetranslationservices.com

Mariela in Los Cristianos, no limits, 24 hour service, hotel-home visits, call 605 072 917 Meliza in Los Cristianos, blond & sexy, 24 hour service, hotelhome visits, call 605 375 495 Nice, sporty, 30 plus, Spanish lady, certified masseur, toys and naughty lingerie also available. Discrete hotel/home visits. Reasonable prices. English speaking. Viagra available. Las Americas - Buzanada. Tel: 602 506 793.

Second-hand Shops

TV and Satellite Menny Fix, Satellite TV Tel 922 792 116 Avnd; Antonio Dominguez 18, Edif: MarOLa Local 2, Los Cristianos. EST 1994, Repairs, Maintenance and Sales.

Latin party girl, 20, in Los Cristianos, no limits, 24 hour service, call 634 948 137 Blond Venezuelan in Los Cristianos, French, Greek, toys, hotel visits, call 628 895 416. New Columbian in Los Cristianos, French, Greek, massage, toys, hotel visits, call 660 938 631. Las Galletas, 2 friends , sexy, slims, big breasts, all services, a soul dance. Make the mind lose it and the body will follow, simple sex. Tel: 669 738 298.

Pest control

Upholstery cleaning

Furniture & Household Items bought for cash Immediate decisions

Phone Freddie 609 303 634 security

Plumbing

Boiler King: All plumbing works undertaken including boiler replacements, drain clearance, swimming pool pump repair & maintenance. Tel: 680 278 579

Windows


CW 52

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Sport

By Roscoe

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

Superstar Ayoze off to Newcastle!

And Tenerife’s promotion dream looks over CD Tenerife 0 Cordoba 1

A FOURTH straight 1-0 defeat has surely signalled the end of a promotion charge for CD Tenerife.

And with news this week that star striker Ayoze Perez is joining Newcastle for two million euros, it seems that thoughts are already turning towards next season. Tenerife sit 10th in the table, yet a month ago they were effectively third and chasing down automatic promotion. They still have a chance to make the play-offs, and nobody is suggesting they are giving up. But they need to find some form and invention, which has been missing recently - and they need a large slice of luck! This Cordoba defeat in many ways sums up the last month. Tenerife again looked tired, mentally and physically, and simply ran out of ideas against a welldrilled defence. Position

It’s the second time storm, and then scored they have had no joy themselves after 18 from Cordoba, who, minutes, you could see in many ways, showed it was going to be anhow to stop what was a other one of those days. It wasn’t for the lack free-flowing attack. Tenerife made an elec- of trying, but the Tentric start and, urged on erife tank was empty by a noisy crowd, were after a long, hard seaimmense in the first son. There are three 10 minutes. But as the visitors rode out the games to be played, Points PLD Won Draw Lost F A

1 RC Deportivo

66

39

18

12

9

45

31

2 SD Eibar

64

39

17

13

9

46

27

3 FC Barcelona B

60

39

18

6

15

54

42

4 UD Las Palmas

60

39

17

9

13

46

43

5 Real Murcia CF

58

39

14

16

9

52

43

6 Real Sporting

57

39

14

15

10

58

50

7 Córdoba CF

56

39

15

11

13

43

42

8 RC Recreativo

56

39

15

11

13

49

50

9 CE Sabadell FC

55

39

16

7

16

50

57

10 CD Tenerife

54

39

15

9

15

46

44

11 AD Alcorcón

53

39

14

11

14

40

36

12 Real Zaragoza

51

39

13

12

14

47

50

13 CD Mirandés

50

39

13

11

15

39

52

14 CD Lugo

50

39

13

11

15

39

46

15 CD Numancia

50

39

10

20

9

38

36

16 SD Ponferradina

48

39

12

12

15

42

44

17 Real Jaén CF

48

39

12

12

15

41

44

18 RCD Mallorca

46

39

11

13

15

43

56

19 Real Madrid CF Castilla

46

39

12

10

17

47

52

20 Deportivo Alavés

45

39

11

12

16

51

53

21 Girona FC

44

39

10

14

15

46

47

22 Hércules CF

41

39

10

11

18

42

59

and CDT must pull together to have any chance of post-season action. But Sabadell, Real Murcia and Sporting Gijon are all above them, and it’s a tough ask for them to get nine points. Sunday’s trip to Sabadell could see the end of La Liga aspirations, and it will be interesting to see how manager Alvaro Cervera approaches it. He has Cristo Martin fit after five weeks out, and he has been missed. He should return, and there is an argument to freshen up the midfield. Aitor Sanz and Ricardo have been magnificent in central midfield, but maybe this is the week to go with plan B. Inigo Ros or Alberto should partner Quique, and I would have Luismi Loro playing behind Ayoze, with Aridane “rested”. Mind you, after the week Ayoze has had, maybe Cervera should look to next season and go with youngster Nano instead. There is a point that Ayoze might be distracted after sealing his move to England. Plenty of big sides have

watched and monitored Ayoze, but Newcastle have won the race. Respected chief scout Graham Carr has raved about the youngster and he has got his man. Ayoze was close to joining Porto a few weeks ago, only for the deal to kick. It’s understood that Ayoze will be on a five-year contract, but he will be registered for the development squad. This will see him with the under-21s and not rushed into the first team straight away. It’s understandable, but also a little strange. He is no longer a “kid”, and has a season in the Segunda Division under his belt. So a move into the “stiffs” cannot help him. If Newcastle want to take him before he goes elsewhere, fine. But surely, first-team football at Tenerife, or a loan to the Championship, will serve him better in the long run! And then there is Newcastle’s record with Spaniards. Jose Enrique was a hit, but Marcelino, Xisco (who played for Cordoba on Saturday) and Albert Luque, were all mega flops. And Luque has

been doing the media rounds this week, talking about his time on the Toon. He told Teide Radio: “The two years I spent there were the two worst years on a personal level. Newcastle is a great club, but it is an experience I would not repeat. The step Ayoze has taken shows tremendous courage on his part, but it’s going to be a challenging move. “They are a football team who play a very English style. They are very direct and when you go there, they give you respect. But they prefer players who come from their own area. “The club is financially very healthy, but every two years they want to start over again and they have a neverending need to change things.” “The contract that he has got will have delighted him but it is a difficult place to go. All three of the Spanish players who have gone there were warned that it was a difficult move and none of the Spaniards were a success. It will not be easy and he will have to do it himself. He will be alone there without any help. It will be tough for him and maybe Porto would have been a better option for him.” While the football continues for another three weeks in Spain, La Liga had a thrilling climax last week. Atletico Madrid held on for the draw they needed to take the title away from Barcelona at the Nou Camp. It is a stunning success for the club, especially when you consider the players they have had to sell to balance the books. They deserve all the plaudits, and they will hope to complete a remarkable double when they face neighbours Real Madrid in the Champions League final this weekend.


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Sport

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

53 CW

Lennon leaves Bhoys NEIL LENNON has resigned as Celtic manager after four successful years. But his departure was no surprise.

It has been rumoured for a while that he was keen to try his luck managing in England. The Northern Ireland man told Celtic’s website: “I have supported Celtic all my life and the club will always be part of me. However, I feel the time is now right to move on to a new challenge. “It was an absolute honour to play for this great club, to captain the team and, of course, to become Celtic manager - a position I cherished dearly. “Of course, I am very pleased that I will be leaving Celtic as Scottish champions, and with the club in such good health. I wish the club nothing but good fortune going forward. I will now assist the club in appointing my successor.” As we go to print, speculation was rife as to who would replace Lennon, and bookies have been adjusting their prices hourly. Hoops legend Henrik

Larsson, currently in charge of Swedish outfit Falkenbergs, is generally seen as the favourite. But it looks a wideopen race for the hot seat. Former Manchester United boss David Moyes would be a popular choice, but he is still sorting out compensation with the Old Trafford owners. Former Cardiff manager Malky Mackay is available, but is also said to be in the running

for the WBA and Norwich jobs, while Owen Coyle and Steve Clarke are also in the frame. In Scotland, there is talk of former player Jackie McNamara being sounded out, while Morten Wieghorst is also being tipped for the post. Lennon had a fine four years. He won three league titles and two Scottish Cups, and he also took Celtic to the Champions League last

16 with a victory over Barcelona in November 2012. Celtic chairman Ian Bankier complimented Lennon, saying: “Neil has given a huge part of his life to serving the club and we will always be grateful for all he has given us. “Ultimately, Neil brought Celtic back to the top of Scottish football, re-introducing the passion and drive which we needed to succeed

and, of course, keeping us there for the last three years. “Neil has shown the club a huge level of commitment and effort over his four years as manager.” Lennon has already been linked with a couple of jobs. It is understood that West Brom are interested, and Lennon has been constantly linked with the Norwich position. The tenacious mid-

fielder started his senior career with Glenavon, before pitching up at Manchester City, Crewe and Leicester, where he had great success under Martin O’Neill. And it was his fellow Northern Ireland man who took him to Celtic in 2000, where he stayed for seven years before hanging up his boots. He returned to Celtic as first-team coach in 2008, taking over as manager in 2010.

Five-star Marquez tops again MARC MARQUEZ, Spain’s MotoGP world champion, overcame a nightmare first lap in the French Grand Prix in Le Mans to become the first rider since 1972 to win the first five races of the season. The 21-year-old, who opened a 42-point championship lead on Sunday, was followed home by Valentino Rossi, with Spain’s Alvaro Bautista third. Bradley Smith was the highestplaced Briton in 10th spot. Marquez also became the youngest rider to win five consecutive races in the premier class, taking the 52year record from England’s Mike Hailwood. And Marquez admitted his sluggish start was down to him taking

it too easy in the opening stages. “In the first two corners I was too calm,” he said. “I need to be a little more aggressive like last year. But it was a little bit harder than the other races. Five victories in a row is not easy, so I’m going to enjoy the moment.” In front of a record French crowd of 88,222, and with on-track temperatures in the mid40s, Marquez appeared to slip out of contention after avoiding former world champion Jorge Lorenzo in the frenzied opening, allowing Rossi to take the lead. But an uncharacteristic mistake from the Italian handed Marquez a golden chance to pass his great rival.


CW 54

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Sport

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

Kandi crush Palms title charge

They say lightening doesn’t strike twice but in Division Two of the Direct Telecom Pool League it certainly has.

Last week Kandi 13 pulled off a major upset against Inn the Pink B and on Tuesday they went and did it again! That victory handed the impetus to Palms B at the top of the table but this week Kandi 13 took it back! They hosted the Palms lads and sent them home with their tails between their legs. Palms B never got going and Kandi 13 were good value for the 7-5 win that throws the title race wide open. Inn the Pink B compounded Palm’s misery by defeating 2JZ’s to move to within a point of Palms B and they still have a game in hand. But it’s worth pointing out that the sides still have to meet again. Elsewhere Bluebell B picked up another three points as they look to cement a top five finish, this time the defeat opponents were Shorty’s. Bluebell are are now level on points with Exiles B who are third but who weren’t in action

this week. Terrace Bar B are still on a charge and they easily dispatched Toscales B for another win and are now just a point off the top five. If only they had started the season like they are finishing it. Bragging rights in Gaffers Bar are not going to be decided just yet, both teams picked up wins this week. The B boys beat Treehouse B while Gaffers C also took the points from Next Door. The B team sit in tenth position and the C team in twelfth spot but just two points separate them. In the final game in the division, Hoppy’s climbed up to eighth spot with a 11- blitzing over the bottom side, Dreamers B. It was business as usual up in Division One. Top dogs Hammers A took a

Premiership Results BAR 180 A BAR 180 D INKSPOTS TARGET TITANS THE PUB VIKINGS ENSECAN

Division 2 results

Division 1 Results Palms Bar A Bar La Cana A Dreamers A Phoenix Potters Tenerife Hammers C Terrace Bar A The Peacocks

4-8 2-10 5-7 6-6 7-5 8-4 6-6

Inn The Pink A Tenerife Hammers A Gaffers A Phoenix Knights Exiles A The Treehouse A Toscales A

Division 1 Table

Table P W D L F A +- PTS 1 Tenerife Hammers A 35 32 1 2 285 135 150 97 2 Gaffers A 33 27 3 3 259 137 122 84 3 Phoenix Knights 35 16 11 8 232 188 44 59 4 Dreamers A 35 16 5 14 221 199 22 53 5 Phoenix Potters 35 15 8 12 217 203 14 53 6 Inn The Pink A 35 15 6 14 227 193 34 51 7 Bar La Cana A 35 14 6 15 193 227 -34 48 8 Palms Bar A 34 12 9 13 199 209 -10 45 9 Exiles A 34 12 7 15 197 211 -14 43 10 Tenerife Hammers C 35 10 4 21 189 231 -42 34 11 The Peacocks 33 8 9 16 176 220 -44 33 12 Terrace Bar A 34 9 5 20 172 236 -64 32 13 The Treehouse A 33 8 5 20 173 223 -50 29 14 Toscales A 34 4 5 25 140 268 - 128 17 trip to Los Abrigos but were never troubled by Sheepy’s La Cana team. Their unbeaten run continues. Is there anybody out there that can end it? Gaffers A

were again in winning form and deserve a hat tip for turning up with just three players. They came through against Dreamers A despite Ashley losing two frames. Maybe he was still up in the clouds after meeting his beloved Burnley team the previous week. The battle of the Phoenix was another well fought contest. Potters had a boost with bossman Geoff away and they put that to good use as they claimed a drew with Knights. Although how Bubbles threw away the final frame

Division 1 Results 5-3 7-1 0-8 5-3 7-1 3-5

PHOENIX BAR ROOD TARGET ARMY GAFFERS B BAR 180 B LA CAÑA PIRATES

BARRACUDA BYTES EMERALD LOUNGE LA CAÑA LANCERS OURPLACE PLAYBOYS PAS O NADAS PICASSOS A

2JZ Bluebell B Hoppys Bar Kandi 13 Next Door Tenerife Pool Tables Toscales B Treehouse B

5-7 9-3 11-1 7-5 4-8 12-0 5-7 3-9

Inn The Pink B Shorty’s Dreamers B Palms Bar B Gaffers C Bluebell A Terrace Bar B Gaffers B

Division 2 table

Table P W D L F A +- PTS 1 Palms Bar B 32 25 2 5 248 136 112 77 2 Inn The Pink B 31 24 4 3 243 129 114 76 3 James Place 30 21 4 5 229 131 98 67 4 Exiles B 31 19 6 6 239 133 106 63 5 Bluebell B 31 20 3 8 209 163 46 63 6 Terrace Bar B 32 19 5 8 219 165 54 62 7 Kandi 13 32 17 6 9 212 172 40 57 8 Hoppys Bar 31 13 7 11 192 180 12 46 9 2JZ 32 13 6 13 195 189 6 45 10 Gaffers B 32 13 5 14 191 193 -2 44 11 Bluebell A 30 13 5 12 174 186 -12 44 12 Gaffers C 32 12 6 14 193 191 2 42 13 Next Door 31 10 3 18 170 202 -32 33 14 Tenerife Pool Tables 31 9 4 18 166 206 -40 31 15 Toscales B 30 9 4 17 160 200 -40 31 16 Treehouse B 30 8 1 21 141 219 -78 25 17 Picasso’s A 32 7 4 21 151 233 -82 25 18 Shorty’s 30 3 1 26 118 242 -124 10 19 Dreamers B 30 1 2 27 90 270 -180 5 is something Harry is still trying to come to terms with. Inn the Pink A finally picked up a win against bogey team Palms A as they continue to build on what has been a great season for them, Palms gifted the Pink the first two frames with in off ’s and had one of those nights were everything goes against you. Down at the bottom

things are getting interesting. Toscales A looked doomed but they took a point off The Peacocks. Tenerife Hammers C did their survival hopes a world of good after doing Exiles A while the Suicide Squad got a rare win. The Terrace A army were too good for an out of sorts Treehouse A, even without Sergio. Incredibbblllleeee!!

Division 2 Results 8-0 5-3 5-3 3-5 2-6 4-4

TRAP DOOR GAFFERS A SUNDOWNERS EMERALD SHAMROCKS CHIPEQUE NAUGHTY NUATAS

CHIPEQUE CHIPPERS MARYLINS PHOENIX FLIGHTS SPEAR CHUCKERS THE BAR

8-0 6-2 3-5 0-8 5-3

PALMS SPORTS BAR OURPLACE PLAYGIRLS THE REBELS WATERFALL WARRIORS AMISTAD 2


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Sport

23rd May 2014 - 29th May 2014

55 CW

World Cup Preview

Bank on Brazil – for now! GROUP A

By Adi Benson

THE football season is over, but the World Cup in Brazil is just around the corner. And over the next four weeks, I will be taking a look at the countries competing. With my easy-to-remember facts and figures, you should be able to pass yourself off down the pub as somewhat of an expert! Once the tournament is underway, I will offer you my predictions, for the quarter-finals, semi-finals and the final.

BRAZIL

CROATIA

MEXICO

CAMEROON

SPAIN

HOLLAND

CHILE

AUSTRALIA

Manager: Niko Kovac Odds: 150/1 Player to watch: Luka Modric Premier League players: 3 Expectations: Fast, attacking fullbacks, skilful midfielders and gifted forwards Reality: Should be a lot more interesting than they actually are How Brazilian are they? Similar to the Brazil of 2006, ageing and living off past glories World Cup highs: Semi-final in 1998 Prediction: Group Runners-up

Manager: Miguel Herrera Odds: 100/1 Player to watch: Oribe Peralta Premier League players: 1 Expectations: Very quick, hightempo football, spectacular goals and red cards Reality: They never live up to the hype, but they can always kick people How Brazilian are they? They are not, but would like to be World Cup highs: Hosted brilliant tournaments, in 1970 & 1986 Prediction: Last in group

Manager: Volker Finke Odds: 500/1 Player to watch: Samuel Eto’o Premier League players: 2 Expectations: Natural athletes, who play with a smile on their faces Reality: Decent defence and midfield, but lacking options up front, Eto’o aside How Brazilian are they? Similar in sacking lots of managers and plenty of in-squad fighting World Cup highs: Roger Milla in 1990 Prediction: Third place in group

GROUP B

Manager: Luiz Felipe Scolari Tournament odds: 7/2 Favourites Player to watch: Neymar Premier League players: 8 Expectations: The game as it should be played, sexy samba football, geniuses all over the pitch Reality: Poor defence and goalie, effective midfield, going to be reliant on the unproven Neymar How Brazilian are they? They are more Brazilian than the Dunga teams, but they are not Pele & Ronaldo. World Cup highs: 5-time winners Prediction: Group winners

Manager: Vicente del Bosque Odds: 5/1 Player to watch: David Silva Premier League players: 11 Expectations: Lots of slick quick passing and silky skills that mesmerise defenders Reality: Lots of slick, quick passing and silky skills that mesmerise defenders, but who will score the goals? How Brazilian are they? More Brazilian than Brazil - and very smug about it World Cup highs: 2010 winners Prediction: Group runners-up

Manager: Louis van Gaal Odds: 18/1 Player to watch: Memphis Depay (cool name!) Premier League players: 13

Expectations: Total football, internal arguments and saying “also” a lot when speaking English Reality: Total football is long gone, but Van Gaal has tried to bring it back How Brazilian are they? Not quite Brazil 1970 but not far off vintage Brazil 1994 World Cup highs: Beating Brazil 2-0 in 1974 which announced the arrival of total football (Ok we get the TF stuff, Ed)

Prediction: Group winners Manager: Jorge Sampaoli Odds: 50/1 Player to watch: Alexis Sanchez Premier League players: 1 Expectations: South American, so weather will help. Reality: Good team in horror group. We need luck How Brazilian are they? They play attractive football, so not far off. Decent bet at the odds offered World Cup highs: Third-place finish in 1962, when they hosted Prediction: Third place in group

Manager: Ange Postecoglou Odds: 300/1 Player to watch: Tim Cahill Premier League players: 1 Expectations: It’s the 83rd most popular sport in Australia, so well done for getting there Reality: Not the team of old. At least they have the Ashes How Brazilian are they? Similar shirt colours, they got to the beach and it’s hot, so very Brazilian! World Cup highs: Last 16 in 2006 Prediction: Last place in group


CW 56

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