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RAJOY SEEKS RE-ELECTION Issue 897 10th April - 16th April 2015
Inside this week...
THE General Election in the UK is less than four weeks away and there seems little to choose between the leading parties. And the closeness is mirrored here in Spain, where there is nothing to separate the top parties in the polls ahead of the national election later this year. Continued on page 3
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Is Rajoy the boy to lead Spain again? Continued from front. Spain’s Prime Minister, Mariano Rajoy this week confirmed that he will seek another term in charge, despite a rough few months. On the surface, he is doing a good job as he leads the country back from the financial precipice. The economy is heading in the right direction, there is now no need for a Greecestyle bailout and recession has long been dismissed. Yet Spain still has horrific unemployment figures, and his party were smashed in last month’s Andalusia elections. His conservative People’s Party polled just 27% down from 40% in 2012, in what was the PP’s worst result in Andalusia in a generation. Nationally, the PP is still leading the way, just, from the Socialists, Ciudadanos and new boys Podemos, led by the youthful Pablo Iglesias. Rajoy started the unofficial election campaign on Tuesday when he said on national radio: “I would like to be a candidate
and become Prime Minister again.” His words came just hours after a mini-conference saw 600 PP members gather in Madrid, where they digested the poor Andalusia results. Privately, it is believed they blamed Rajoy. He has been unable to clean the party’s public image after the 2013 corruption scandal. And just before the Andalusia polling, a judge revealed that the party had a secret slush fund over the last 18 years. But Rajoy seemed to quell any rebellion in a speech when he said: “I will not appeal for party unity, because this party is already united. We must distinguish between what is important and what is not, and not be distracted by insignificant and irrelevant issues. “There is a lot of talk about change in Spain right now. But the real change in Spain happened at the end of 2011.” Rajoy is clearly going t o
make the economic recovery in Spain his main plank for re-election. It is something of which he can be proud, but the feeling is that the turning of the tide is not filtering down to towns and villages. Many Spaniards are still experiencing hardship and, though Rajoy has built bridges with the wealthy and major business, it is felt that he doesn’t have the common touch. Next month’s regional and local elections will give everyone a better picture of where the country is going. Rajoy’s PP holds 11 regional governments and 3,500 municipalities. Will, the many experts ask, necessary, deep cuts of 150 billion euros from the government spending on public services, come back to bite him? One in three Spaniards remains unemployed, which has helped fuel support for the anti-austerity Podemos party. Ciudadanos, seen by many as the protest vote party, mopped up in Andalusia. In many ways the party is a compromise between the PP and Podemos. Rajoy has actually had a good week be-
cause it has been revealed that the Spanish economy grew 1.4% in 2014 - its first full year of growth since 2008. And unemployment in March fell by 344,000, compared with the same month in 2014. The 24 May elections will see 1,601 councillor positions up for grabs in the Canary Islands. In Tenerife’s 31 municipalities, there will be 527 councillors elected. Santa Cruz and La Laguna have 27 councillors each. There will be 25 councillors in Arona and 21 in Adeje, Granadilla, Icod de los Vinos, La Orotava, Puerto de la Cruz, Los Realejos and Candelaria. Seventeen seats are up for grabs in San Miguel de Abona, Santiago del Teide, El Rosario, Tegueste, St Ursula and Guimaras. Arico, Garachico, La Guancha, La Matanza, El Sauzal, La Victoria, San Juan de la Rambla each have 13. Arafo, Fasnia, Buenavista del Norte, Los Silos and El Tanque will have 11 members and Vilaflor nine. All-important local positions are being fought. Carlos Alonso is favourite to retain his p o s i -
tion as Tenerife Cabildo President, and it would be a surprise if he didn’t win his first election as leader. He got the President’s position after the retirement of Ricardo Melchior. The race for Santa Cruz Mayor seems to be Jose Manuel Bermudez’s to lose. He is popular in the Tenerife capital and should get four more years, before a possible tilt at Alonso’s Cabildo position. And these local elections will be conducted with all the latest technology. Francisco Hernández Spinola, Minister of Justice in the Canary Islands, said this week: “These elections will be the most technological in the history of the region. “We have spent over 1.7 million euros to bring the best and latest devices to the archipelago.” The Minister announced at a press conference that the next elections will see electronic voting for the first time. There will be over 1,000 special tablets and devices in Santa Cruz for polling. This will speed up the process of data transmission after the polls close. Can-
delaria will also have polling stations, which will be electronically administered, with a specific mobile application to monitor election day and counting in real time. Hernandez Spinola also said that voting by mail will be conducted via an online transaction. The procedure for voting by mail ends on 14th May. For the blind, there will also be a specific system in braille to ensure full autonomy at the time of voting. “It is, in short, to make the vote for all persons over 18 years of age possible,” said Hernandez Spinola. “It’s a fair system and gives everyone the chance to cast their vote.” For more information relating to the 24th May electoral process, visit this website: www.infoelecciones2015.gobiernodecanarias.org It contains the full electoral calendar, the results of the 2011 elections and, once the count starts, you can continue to monitor the votes in the Canary Islands in real time.
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It’s dictator Franco - and that’s official
Golden Mile set to glitter WORK began this week to improve the Avenida de las Americas, known as the Golden Mile, in the centre of Las Americas. Cabildo President Carlos Alonso launched the project, which involves an investment of over four million euros. The work will continue until the end of 2015, but it is hoped that everything will be finished before the start of the busy Christmas shopping season. The improvements will, says Alonso, “transform this avenue, where over 420 businesses do vital work for our community”. It’s not just a new road system and improvements because pavements and sur-
roundings will be upgraded, with parking spaces reduced. Also planned is a brand-new lighting system, indoor sanitation and improved interior sewage pipes, which should put an end to the problems caused by heavy rain. Alonso, accompanied by Arona Mayor Francisco Nino, Employment and Economic Minister Efraín Medina and Miguel Becerra, general coordinator of Tourism and Strategic Projects, said the works “will take place in four phases to minimise the inconvenience that all work entails, especially considering that this important tourist area has the largest commercial density in Tenerife”.
Promises, promises! THERE has been another update on the planned opening of a key section of the ringroad expansion ... and it’s a familiar message! Cabildo President Carlos Alonso is confident the southern section of the TF-1 ring, between Santiago del Teide and Vera Erques (Guía de Isora), will be operating by the end of this month. “It’s all systems go for the end of April,” he said. “The Canarian Government has not yet formally confirmed one specific time, but that is very likely.” The original deadline was the end of March, but poor weather caused a delay. Then there were some cracks in the infrastructure of one of the tunnels. This has now been fixed.
There are still a few problems on the snag list, and also more resurfacing on some patches of road. Carlos Alonso, keen to give this final push, has authorised another four million euros towards the project. This, he says, “allows that we can resume work quickly and get it finished”. The President stressed: “This is a bitter-sweet situation because, on one hand, the deadline has been missed, but we will still be open almost immediately.” Similarly, he said the rest of the road, including part of the Adeje project and the installation of the Erques viaduct, would be finished in three months. Weather, cracks and promises permitting, of course!
GENERAL Franco, who ruled Spain with an iron fist for almost four decades, will finally be labelled a “dictator” and not an “authoritarian” in his official biography.
Carmen Iglesias, new director of Spain’s statefunded Royal Academy of History, wants to end the controversy surrounding the existing entry on the Spanish military leader in the institution’s biographical dictionary. It describes the Franco regime as “authoritarian but not totalitarian”, but Ms Iglesias told a Madrid conference that the 2011 publication would be corrected. The update will reflect the dictatorial style of the man who ruled Spain from the end of the country’s civil war in 1939 until his 1975 death. Ms Iglesias, the first woman to preside over the academy, said the entry for Franco had created an “unnecessary controversy” which will be sorted out in the first digital edition of the biographical dictionary, currently underway. Four years ago, in what was seen as a remarkable apology for the Franco regime, it was revealed that his entry in the dictionary - produced at a cost to the public coffers of 6.4m euros (£4.7m) - portrayed a man who “became famous for the cold courage he showed in the field”. But the harshly-repressive nature of his 36 years in power were glossed
over. Luis Suárez, the historian responsible for the Franco entry, was an expert on medieval history and, for many years, the only person given access to the dictator’s family archive, held by the Francisco Franco Foundation. Paul Preston, a history professor at the London School of Economics and Franco biographer, welcomed any improvement on a text he described as “laughable”. He said that Ms Iglesias was being “brave” in correcting what he said was the academy’s right-wing bias. “The original text was basically a hagiography of Franco, making him out to be a saintly figure and not even a dictator,” said Prof Preston. “It was offensive to all those who are not ma-
jor fans of Franco. “But as there was constant brain-washing going on during the 40 years of his regime, there are still quite a lot of those about.” The professor said that apart from the Franco entry, many of the dictator’s military supporters “guilty of monumental atrocities” were written about by “soldiers who portrayed their military careers and excluded their dirty deeds”. Spanish historian Ángel Viñas was so indignant over the dictionary’s treatment of Franco, and other 20th century figures, that he edited a riposte called “In the combat for history”. In it, 34 historians, including Prof Preston, rebut what they consider the inaccuracies of the
academy’s biographical dictionary. Mr Viñas said: “In the academy there have been, and still are, people who have not got over the legacy of Franco,” adding that the selection of Mr Suárez to write the entry on the dictator showed the institution was “fundamentally dysfunctional”. A Royal Academy of History spokesman said there would be a complete revision of the dictionary as part of the digitalisation process. But it had still not been decided who would be in charge of revising the entry on Franco. “There will be a protocol decided on by the academy as a whole.” he added. “It is not just the decision of the director.”
African market warming up CANARIAN exports to Africa, excluding fuel, rose 23% in 2014 over the previous year to reach 110 million euros, This is an impressive leap from 89m in 2013. The increase represents the revival of sales in Africa after two consecutive years of declines, according to data provided by Proexca. Javier González Orti, Minister of Economy, Finance and Security,
said: “These are encouraging figures and show how well we can do. “We must push for further internationalisation and openness, especially in the African markets as they are a growing opportunity.” The Proexca report shows that Canary exports to Mauritania are worth 24m euros - an increase of 6% over the previous year. Exports to Cape Verde rose 19%
and a volume of 14.7m, while Liberia is worth 13.5m; Ivory Coast, doubled the 2013 sum to 9.3m and Equatorial Guinea, with a similar figure, completes the countries with the largest share. In terms of best-sellers, the best performing sector was the fish and shellfish which, along with glass and glassware, experienced a significant rise against
2013, going from 3.6m to 13.5m and 4.9m to 12.4m, respectively. Exports of machinery, boats and vehicles accounted for a volume which, together, totalled 37m euros last year. The paper and paperboard industries sold 7m, and plastic a total of 4m. Meanwhile, the US market brought in 786m euros, which was 4% less than the previous year.
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Crash puts former Island chief Melchior in hospital RICARDO Melchior, beloved former head of Tenerife Cabildo, was involved in a nasty car accident this week.
Sporting King’s road traffic fine KING Felipe VI has confessed to receiving a fine from traffic police for a motoring offence - when he was a mere Prince!
The Spanish Monarch, who was visiting the General Directorate of Traffic (DGT)’s headquarters on Easter Monday, gave a speech to representatives from the country’s highway police forces, in which he thanked them for their “good work’” The King said: “We thank you for your ef-
forts, which benefit numerous families in Spain, and especially knowing that you put your own lives in danger through it on occasion.” Of the heavy volume of cars on the country’s major trunk roads on the last day of the Easter break, the King wished all those present a safe journey back to base without incident. King Felipe also admitted that a few years ago, he ended up with a traffic fine, which had them laughing. He wouldn’t reveal what the sanction was for, but said there were no hard feelings!
His vehicle overturned on the southbound part of the TF-1 in Arico, and he had to be cut free by firefighters. He suffered trauma to his leg and his hand and was hospitalised overnight on Tuesday at the UHC (University hospital). The 68-yearold was assessed in the morning and then taken to surgery. It is understood that the ex-President required surgery to repair damaged ankle tendons in his ankle, and he is expected to be in hospital for a few days. A statement issued on his behalf thanked the emergency services, ambulance and hospital staff for their efforts. He is said to be in good spirits, but
remembers little of the accident. Melchior’s accident was the culmination of a new black day for Tenerife’s roads. Appalling weather on Tuesday caused a plethora of traffic problems. Heavy morning rain caused chaos on the section of the TF-5 between La Matanza and Puerto de la Cruz. There were multiple accidents caused by poor visibility through fog, and a slippery road surface. Police said there were three major accidents in which at least 10 vehicles were involved. Thankfully, there were no fatalities, but there were a few broken bones. L a t e r in the
day, there was another sickening crash on the TF-5 which saw four people hospitalised, one of them seriously, after an overturned car collided with another vehicle. Melchior was President of Tenerife Cabildo from 1999 until he retired in 2013. H e neve r
lost an election and was respected and admired on all sides of the political spectrum in Tenerife. Recently, he spoke of how much he was enjoying his retirement, even though he was still doing some “advising” for various politicians.
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Thousands flock into Adeje to salute The Passion again
AROUND 10,000 people attended Adeje’s magnificent staging of The Passion last Friday on the Calle Grande. And the colourful, though tragic, annual event was also broadcast live on Canaries TV España. Viewers were able follow the event via online streaming, or listen on Radio Sur Adeje 107.9fm or Radio Nacional España. More than 300 people took part, the majority of them Adeje residents, who were transformed into the many followers of Jesus of Nazareth during the last days of his life. The staging of 2015’s The Passion was overseen, as always, by Adeje’s Department of Culture, under Councillor Nayra Medina Bethencourt and Laura Marrero, the Department’s Artistic Director. Adeje Mayor José Miguel Rodríguez Fraga, who also took part in the event, congratulated the enormous cast and crew afterwards. “Without you this would not happen, there would be no Passion Play in Adeje,” he told them. “We are not just showing the world another side of Adeje, the tourist destination. We are showing a people who love and treasure their traditions, and a people who are capable of taking on
any project, no matter how ambitious, and seeing it through successfully when we all put our minds to it.” The Mayor added: “Every year, The Passion generates new feelings and emotions for us. We see things with fresh eyes, and deep sentiments are reawoken that are much more than our religious beliefs or thoughts.” This theatrical work began at noon with the entrance of Jesus Christ into Jerusalem. The town was recreated on the Calle Grande with a market typical of the era, complete with food, animals (goats, horses), plus falcons, snakes, doves. The crowd also joined in the chorus of Hosanna at the entrance of Jesus, played by José Antonio López, who has adopted the part for a number of years. Following the entrance, the focus shifted to The Last Supper in the plaza Cruz del Llano, followed by a meeting of Jesus with Mary Magdalene, played by Ainhoa Aguilar, a student in the municipal School of Music and Dance (EMMA) and a recent contestant on Spain’s version of The Voice. The music served to build the emotion of the scenes, and was composed for the representation by the school of mu-
sic, under the direction of Juan Carlos Coronado. The scene in the Garden of Gethsemane saw Jerusalem asleep and the kiss from Judas, who, racked with the guilt of betraying Our Lord, subsequently takes his own life. The Passion then switched to Pontius Pilate and Claudia (played by Raúl de Castro Soriano, a student in the Adeje Municipal Theatre School, Teatro UPA and María Herrera Bethencourt, a student at the EMMA), and to the palace of Herod and Herodias (played by professional actor Nacho Almenar Vera and Adeje Theatre and UPA student Nuria Mariscal). On the return of Jesus to Pontius Pilate, the audience also had a chance to see the meeting between Jesus and St John (Agoney Hernández, EMMA) and the song expressing the suffering of Christ and the unconditional love of the Apostle for his Lord. Tears among participants and spectators were in evidence as Jesus was whipped and beaten and began the walk to Calvary, with the slope of the Calle Grande in Adeje towards the Plaza España lending to the realistic imagery presented. The audience then saw a bloodied Jesus Christ, wearing his crown of
thorns, in pain, falling and suffering on his way to be crucified. His mother, the Virgin Mary, played by Adeje resident Ana Oneida Borges, accompanied him and offered words of comfort. On his way, as was written, he meets Verónica, who cleans his face with a cloth. Jesus continued on his cross-bearing way, visibly weakening, falling three times in all, until he arrives at the Plaza. The solemnity of the crucifixion was observed by the thousands present, with Jesus crying out “Father, forgive them for they know not what they do” as the nails were driven into his hands. Finally, “Into your hands I commend my spirit”, and with his death, the Virgin Mary gave a heartfelt, emotive speech on the passing of her only son. Once the representation was over, the procession took place with the Fallen Christ brought to the Church of Santa Ursula Martír. This statue, from the
20th century, was acquired by the Hermandad del Santisimo. Changes to the entire presentation this year included improved stages for Herod and Pilate, with new costumes and additional props in the Jerusalem market, creating a more realistic atmosphere. Dances by students from EMMA. as well as those from Beanky Ballet, also added to the colour of the event. The participation of the EMMA musical department was also vital, with original songs and compositions, incorporating some traditional Canarian musical themes and instruments. The timple, cháracas, the drum, airs and dances add to creating the atmosphere of the era. During the busy event, there were no incidents reported to the special security detail in place for the duration of The Passion. Organisers were delighted with the success of this year’s event, congratulating all those who took part, as well as
those who worked tireless backstage as well, The spectacular event has achieved a huge cultural standing in Adeje, which attracts vast interest throughout Spain and beyond. Many who were present in the audience will have already uploaded photographs and videos online at #pasiondeadeje2015. Main cast: Jesús (José Antonio López Delgado), Simon Peter (Gonzalo Delgado Ferrera), Judas Iscariot (Balta Isla), Caifás (Francisco Javier Rodríguez del Toro), Anás (Juan Esteban Bravo), Nicodemo (Santi Cano), Centurian (Laudi), Pontias Pilate (Raúl De Castro Soriano), Claudia (María Herrera Bethencourt), Mary (Ana Oneida), Mary Magdelene (Ainhoa Aguilar), María de Cleofás (Milagros), John (Agoney Hernández), Santiago (Francis Méndez Trujillo), Thomas (Pepe Aquino Suárez), Andrew (Manuel Pérez Ramos), Mathew (Epifanio Díaz), Simon (David Pérez), Judas Tadeo (Jesús Manuel Álvarez Marichal), Philip (Florencio Javier), Santiago el de Alfeo (Sergio Vargas), Bartolomé (Pepe Esquivel), Herod (Nacho Almenar), Herodias (Nuria Mariscal Cervós) and The Devil (Víctor Herrera).
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What is so Grand about the National? IT’S Grand National weekend, and the once-ayear punters will be out in force. I’d hate to be behind the desk at the betting shops in the UK tomorrow (Saturday). Trying to explain how betting works and what an each-way bet is would be a nightmare.
Literally every man and his dog will suddenly become experts for one race. And if you happen to bump into somebody who has won, they will be insufferable for the whole weekend. I love horse-racing. I love going to the races, the characters, the homework, the whispers, the jostle with the bookies and, most of all, the horses. Not being able to go racing is the biggest thing I miss living here. But I hate the Grand National. Forty not very good horses, running over a marathon distance, is
not my idea of fun. Give me a Group 1 race every time. But if it gets people interested in the sport, then that’s brilliant. I just hope all the horses come back in one piece so the dogooders don’t get their five minutes of fame. As I’ve already said, I love horses and don’t want a single one injured, let alone staring at the barrel of a gun behind those horrific green screens. But let’s be frank here. Racehorses only exist to race. The clue is in the name. If there were no racing, then there would be no racehorses. No thoroughbreds. Every year, hundreds of humans get killed participating in sport. But it’s only boxing and horse-racing that gets the bad press. Some 245 riders have died competing in the Isle of Man TT over the last 100 years. It is understood that, on average, 20 people die every year from playing American Football. But you don’t read about that do you? Anyway, enjoy the race, have a flutter… and cheer on your horse!
Dear Editor, I am clutching at straws, but I really hope you can help me trace an old friend and colleague. His name is Colin Fischer and he moved to Tenerife from Marbella in February. To where exactly I am not sure, but in his emails to me he used an internet cafe somewhere in Costa Adeje or Los Cristianos. He never gave me his address or phone number, but his email address was colinfischer56@hotmail.com - and that is all I know. He was once a concert pianist, and a very good one at that, having graduated from the Royal Northern College of Music in Manchester, and working in many places around the world. He finally decided to move lock, stock and piano to Tenerife, and was doing well as a piano teacher and performer. Colin was in his mid-seventies, had high blood pressure and suffered with depression, among other ailments. But he was receiving regular treatment from a doctor. His last contact with me was in February, just after his move, and then everything went quiet. From his emails, I learned that he had made many new friends in Tenerife, and that he was happy, attending concerts with many of them. He spoke of his membership at the local AA as a recovering alcoholic. He gave up booze 17 years ago, and was so pleased that he had beaten it. And he told me he had turned to God as a born-again Christian. I have tried getting information about him on Facebook, but without success. It is always sad when you lose touch with a good friend, and I am concerned for his welfare. We worked together as professional musicians on cruise ships and in Blackpool in the Seventies and Eighties, and I have many happy memories of this wonderful man. Hoping you can solve the mystery. Leslie J. Weddell, retired trombonist
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JUST hours after arriving at a luxury Marbella resort, a Scottish tourist was found drowned in a swimming-pool tragedy.
Brian Nicol was discovered on Easter Sunday morning at the villa complex. The 32-year-old Glaswegian dragged himself on to the side of the pool, but he subsequently died. A postmortem examination confirmed that he had died from drowning. Mr Nicol was staying at the Nueva Andalucia complex, an upmarket area near the millionaires’ paradise of Puerto Banus. He was among a group who flew there on Saturday, it was said, to celebrate a birthday. They had been enjoying a night out in Mar-
bella before returning to the rented villa to carry on partying around the pool. Police have no suspicions about Mr Nicol’s death, a spokesman saying: “All the evidence is pointing towards a tragic accident.” A neighbour at the complex said: “The house is usually empty, but we noticed people on the tennis courts so we assumed it was being rented. “We usually hear when people are having parties, but I don’t recall hearing any noise before the police cars and ambulances started arriving.” A spokesman for the paramedics who attempted to revive Mr Nicol said: “We received a call at 8.40am on Sunday and found a foreign man lying by the pool when we arrived. Unfortunately, we could do nothing to save him.”
The art of recycling
ADEJE midweek Farmers Market, which began last week, held its second workshop on Wednesday entitled ‘La Ruleta de Reciclaje’ (The Recycling Roulette). The objective was to encourage an awareness of environmental
Tel: 902 232 102
Marbella pool shock
care, and the importance of proper treatment of rubbish. With the workshop - run alongside the market itself - was a stand from the Canarian Green and Sustainable Environmental association, co-sponsors of this particular
event with the Council. Other activities included making bracelets, flowers, etc, from recycled materials, in particular recycling plastics. There are more activities planned during April and May, giving customers and those
involved in the Farmers Market yet another reason to visit on Wednesdays. Both of this week’s recycling activities were sponsored by ECOEMBES (a national, non-profit organisation charged with recycling).
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Binge drinkers are costing the NHS a fortune ROAD crashes, A&E admissions, police time and court cases add up to nearly £5bn annually because of binge boozing.
A damning report says current policies on alcohol taxation are failing to keep up with the financial consequences of people drinking to excess. Dr Jonathan James, a member of the research team from the University of Bath, said: “We know a lot about the effects and costs of sustained heavy drinking in relation to increased risks of chronic diseases, damage to social relationships and the increased burden placed on public services. “We hope this calculation of the economic costs will act as a catalyst for UK policy-makers to take action to reduce the cost of binge drinking to society.” Binge drinking usually refers to drinking a lot of alcohol rapidly, or boozing to get drunk. Doctors in the UK define binge drinking as consuming eight or more units in a single session for men, and six or more for women. In the long term, heavy drinking can cause damage to the brain, triggering symptoms like poor memory. The report’s combined estimates of £4.9 billion annually is equivalent to almost £13.5 million a day - or £77 day for every person in Britain. The researchers are recommending a minimum 52 pence minim u m
unit price for alcohol, and a boost in alcohol excise duty in line with alcohol strength, which would see the price of a pint rise by 23p and a bottle of wine by 99p. The authors calculate that binge drinking increases the average number of injury-related A&E admissions by 8% every day - equivalent to 2,504 additional daily admissions across the country. It increases the daily average of road accidents by 17%, equivalent to 82 additional accidents per day nationally. And it causes a 45% rise in the average number of alcohol-related arrests, equivalent to 786 additional arrests per day nationally. This means the number of police officers on duty goes up by almost one-third because of alcohol-related offences and incidents That’s the equivalent to an additional 3.2 police officers on duty at the weekend for every 10,000 people in the country. The research team, at Bath University - working with colleagues at Essex University - conclude that to mitigate these effects and recover the extra costs would mean a hike of 10p per unit. The study calculated that binge drinking causes a 45% rise in the average number of alcohol-related arrests, equivalent to 786 additional arrests per day nationally And it also leads to an 8% increase in the average number of injury-
10th April - 16th April 2015
Sale of the century: 4-bed home for €10 THIS must have been the snip to beat them all! A four-bedroom home in Spain went for just 10 euros.
The owners, hamstrung by the country’s struggling property market, came up with an ingenious plan to offload the house they inherited two years ago after failing to sell it for 90,000 euros. The house, close to a former palace and the remains of a medieval wall in rural Valencia, is in a prime location. It is 20 miles from the beach, and there’s even an artificial ski hill 50 miles away. And all it cost the new owner was 10 euros (£7.35) in a raffle. When the previous owners, the Bolumar family, first wanted to sell the house they had inherited two years ago in the small town of Segorbe, they tried to do it the traditional way. But the housing market yielded few potential buyers and 35-yearold Pepe Bolumar said: “It was really complicated.” The family began conrelated A&E admissions every day, which is equivalent to 2,504 additional daily admissions across the country Professor Marco Francesconi, head of the Department of Economics at the University of Essex, added: “Our calculations put the cost at £4.9bn per year, which is large
sidering alternative ways to sell the property, but most ideas were dismissed quickly, except one. “Raffling it off seemed interesting.” added Mr Bolumar, who manages a small business in Valencia. “People would have the chance to acquire a home for a low cost, and we would still end up covering the cost.” But the project, so easy to discuss, took an entire year to complete. The family had to wrestle their way through seemingly-endless red tape to obtain authorisation from the country’s tax authorities to be the first in Spain to raffle off a house. The 10-euro tickets, sold from a Valencia kiosk as well as online, offered a no-stringsattached chance to win when compared with Government spending on some welfare programmes. “But we haven’t included costs associated with absenteeism, lost employment, reduced productivity, and longterm health problems.” He added: “Harmful alcohol use has been identified as one of the leading, preventa b l e causes of
the 141sq.m home. As news of the raffle spread through Facebook and Twitter, 32,000 tickets were sold, the majority of them in Spain but also as far away as Australia and Canada. Those in Florida, said Mr Bolumar, seemed to be particularly taken with the idea. “Lots of people from Florida and England called us.” Some of the calls were heartbreaking, he recalled, from families who had been evicted from their homes or who had fallen on tough times and were desperately hoping to win the house. As the family prepared to gather together with a notary to watch the numbered balls drop from a borrowed lottery machine, Mr Bolumar was confident the famdeath and key risk factors for chronic disease, such as cancer, and injuries worldwide.” The report comes just a month after the NHS head warned that binge drinking, fuelled by cheap alcohol, was having a “huge impact” on health services. Chief executive Simon Stevens said the Government needed to deal with the “overuse” of alcohol urgently because ir was creating problems for over-stretched A&E units. He highlighted figures showing that the average price of alcohol relative to wages has dropped by almost half since the Eighties. Although Mr Stevens did not directly call for a minimum price for alcohol, he said ministers should “take a look” at what needed to be done. The most recent NHS figures show that more than one million patients are being ad-
ily had recouped the original sale price of the house, estimating they would pocket a 10,000euro bonus. “It’s less than what it appears - we didn’t receive 320,000 euros because we have to cover our costs of the past year,” he said, pointing out publicity, as well as the cost of servers and maintenance for the website. The family will also cover any taxes incurred by the winner from the transfer of the house. “But the winner doesn’t have to pay a thing more,” he stressed. Throughout the process, Mr Bolumar said the family regularly received phone calls from others interesting in raffling off their own houses. They now plan to keep the website www.lotohome.es open to help guide others looking to do the same. “It was a huge amount of effort,” said Mr Bolumar. “It took up a whole year and became a second job for me.” But it proved an effective way to beat the tumbling Spanish property market.
mitted to hospital for alcohol-related illness and injuries every year twice as many as a decade ago. But despite the evergrowing toll on health services, the Government has so far refused to introduce minimum pricing. Ministers claim it would hit responsible drinkers, but critics accuse them of “dancing to the tune’”of the alcohol industry. And while binge drinking puts added pressure on health services, research has shown it can actually alter a person’s genes. US researchers said that excessive alcohol use can cause changes in the liver. It changes basic proteins, called histones, by altering how they protect and regulate DNA. Their findings were presented at the Royal Economic Society Conference in Manchester.
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News
10th April - 16th April 2015
Passport scheme should collar all the undesirables ALL passengers leaving the UK are now subject to the most intensive Government scrutiny under a scheme at ports and border crossings.
Transport staff are recording details of all travellers leaving by commercial air, sea and rail transport. The exit checks are aimed at cross-channel ferry and Channel Tunnel travellers in particular. The government said they were needed to combat illegal immigration and would cause the “least possible disruption”. Initial reports suggest the new system has begun without any major problems. There have been no delays at the Eurotunnel terminal in Folkestone, or at Dover’s P&O Ferries’ terminal. All passports will be scanned for the first month, but just 25% of passportholders will have their details verified to ensure they are genuine, in a bid to minimise disruption. After a month, there will be a move to 50% verification and, by the middle of June, 100% confirmation will be introduced. Data is being collected on all passengers as they leave the UK on scheduled, commercial, international air, sea and rail routes. The government says exit checks are “pre-
dominately an immigration and data tool”, giving a “comprehensive picture” of whether people leave the UK when they are supposed to. It says the data gathered by airline, rail or ferry operator staff - will “improve our ability to identify and further tighten the immigration routes and visas that are most vulnerable to abuse”. It will also help security services “track the movements of known or suspected criminals and terrorists”. School coach parties of under-16 children will be exempt from checks. Eurotunnel, which manages and operates the Channel Tunnel, said it was moving to immediate 100% checks. It is also asking passengers to provide Advance Passenger Information (API) before travel. John Keefe, director of public affairs for Eurotunnel UK, told BBC Radio 4’s Today programme that passengers “shouldn’t expect longer queues”. He said some £2.5m had been spent on measures, including refurbishing its terminal, and that 50 new staff had been recruited. But he called for the introduction of new technology to make the process easier and faster in coming years, saying Eurotunnel expected substantial growth in passenger and truck numbers. P&O Ferries said a “quiet day” had been
chosen for the introduction of the exit checks, its spokesman adding: “The actual scanning of passports is quick. It’s the verification that takes longer.” John Vine, former independent Chief Inspector of Borders and Immigration, told BBC Breakfast: “It will enable the government, for the first time in a long time, to have an idea of who’s left in Britain. “That’s because, until recently, it has not been possible for the Government to know who have overstayed their visa and who have remained in the country, and they’ve not known who’s here and who’s left.” Immigration Minister James Brokenshire said: “Port and travel operators are experts in their business and know their customers best, which is why we’ve supported them to design and trial the systems for collecting data in a way that will minimise the impact on customers.” The new rules were brought in under the Immigration Act 2014. The API system, introduced in 2004, already gives the Government information on passengers flying in and out of the UK. The exit checks mean information will now be gathered on people leaving by any commercial transport. But people arriving in the UK will also remain subject to passport checks.
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News
10th April - 16th April 2015
MEN in their sixties and upwards are 10 times more susceptible to being diagnosed with malignant melanoma than people of their parents’ generation.
The cheap packageholiday boom of the Sixties and Seventies means pensioners are now seven times more likely to develop the deadliest form of skin cancer. Youngsters in those days would think nothing of lazing around on Spanish beaches for hours on end, hoping to return to the UK with the best tan of all! Cancer Research UK has supplied new figures to show that men in this age bracket are five times more vulnerable to the disease than women of the same era. Some 5,700 pensioners are now diagnosed with melanoma each year in the UK, compared with
600 in the mid-Seventies, and it’s much than just an age thing. Getting sunburnt once every two years can triple a person’s risk of developing the disease. Professor Richard Marais, Cancer Research UK’s skin-cancer expert based in Manchester, said: “It’s important for people to keep an eye on their skin and seek medical opinion if they see any changes to their moles, or even to normal areas of skin. “Melanoma is often detected on men’s backs and women’s legs, but it can appear on any part of the body.”
Malignant melanoma is the country’s fifthmost-common cancer overall and the secondmost-common cancer in people aged 15 to 34. As many as 2,100 Britons die from the disease each year, and Dr Julie Sharp, Cancer Research UK’s head of health information, said: “Sun damage accumulates over time, so avoiding sunburn - and sunbeds is key, as well as getting to know your skin type so you don’t overdo it on the beach, or even in the garden.” Retired teacher Sue Deans, 69, from Croydon, south London, was diagnosed with malignant melanoma in 2000 after having a mole removed. She said: “I was part of the generation where package holidays became affordable, and you could go abroad nearly every year. !I don’t think there was much understanding at the time about the impact that too much sun can have on your risk of getting skin cancer.”
A NEW battery that can be charged and ready for use in one minute, will almost certainly be a great boon to youngsters, who seem to live their lives on a mobile phone.
Scientists have developed an aluminium power cell, which is also much safer than existing lithium technology because it can be bent and damaged, and does not catch fire. Researchers at California’s Stanford Universi-
ty maintain the battery can be recharged more often than usual batteries without losing its effectiveness. It has the potential to be a major breakthrough, with electricity storage becoming increasingly important in tandem with renewable energy. Hongjie Dai, Professor of Chemistry at Stanford, said: “We have developed a rechargeable aluminium battery that may replace existing storage devices, such as alkaline batteries. “These are bad for the environment, as are lithium-ion batteries, which occasionally burst into flames. “Our new battery won’t catch fire, even if you drill through it. But lithium batteries can go off in an unpredictable manner in the air, the car or in
your pocket.” Besides safety, he said the team had transformed battery performance with “unprecedented charging times” of down to one minute being reported. Unlike previouslydeveloped aluminium batteries, which have been reported to die after just 100 chargedischarge cycles, the Stanford prototype can withstand up to 7,500 charges. The typical lithium battery lasts for 1,000 cycles. In this month’s edition of the Nature journal, the authors wrote in an article: “This was the first time an ultra-fast aluminium-ion battery was constructed with stability over thousands of cycles.” Ming Gong, co-lead author of the Nature study, added: “Another feature of the aluminium battery is flexibility. “You can bend it and fold it, so it has the potential for use in flexible electronic devices. Aluminium is also a cheaper metal than lithium.”
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News
10th April - 16th April 2015
Oil giant’s shelling out £47bn for energy firm ROYAL Dutch Shell, known simply as Shell in the UK, has agreed to buy BG Group, the giant oiland-gas exploration company for £47bn.
The two firms have agreed a cash-andshares offer which gives investors a 50% premium on BG’s 7th April share price. The deal could be one of the biggest this year, producing a company valued at more than £200bn. Shell’s £177bn market capitalisation is far greater than that of BG, which stands at £31bn after a 20% fall in its share price over the past year. Yet BG Group is still the UK’s third-largest energy company, employing some 5,200 people in 24 countries. It was created in 1997 when British Gas demerged into two separate companies: BG and Centrica. BG took control of exploration and production while Centrica took charge of the UK retail business of the former British Gas, but BG split into BG Group and Lattice Group in 2000. The deal comes at a time of uncertainty for oil and gas companies. In the past six months the price of oil has fallen by about 50%. And analysts have warned that investment in North Sea oil explora-
tion has all but dried up, threatening the entire industry. Yet Shell, confirming that it would pay its existing shareholders $1.88 per ordinary share this year, stressed that BG Group shareholders would enjoy higher dividends. That compares with a dividend of just $0.14 that BG Group shareholders can expect to receive this year. The oil giant also said it expected to begin a share buy-back programme in 2017 of at least $25bn. Shell said it would also provide BG Group shareholders with a “mix-and-match facility”, allowing them to
vary how much they receive in cash and new Shell shares. Shell and BG Group expect to make annual savings of $2.5bn following the deal. But Shell chief executive Ben van Beurden said he remained committed to North Sea oil and expected to invest £4bn between 2016 and 2018. Shell said the deal would also add 25% to its proven oil and gas reserves and 20% to production capacity, particularly in Australia’s liquid natural-gas (LNG) market and in deep-water oil exploration off the Brazilian coast. BG Group sharehold-
ers will own some 19% of the combined group following the deal. BG Group’s roots go back to the Fifties, when it was part of the UK’s Gas Council and then British Gas, which was privatised in 1986. British Gas was demerged into two separate public companies in 1997: BG and Centrica. BG took charge of exploration and production, as well as its British transmission and distribution business Transco. Another de-merger in 2000 created two new public companies: BG Group and Lattice Group, with the latter inheriting the Transco
Bust-up pilots grounded TWO Air India pilots, said to have had a “verbal” punch-up in the cockpit, have been grounded.
The Times of India said that the co-pilot reportedly struck the captain, but the airline insisted the altercation had nothing to do with physical violence.
An airline spokesman said: “Both pilots have been de-rostered. An inquiry has been ordered.” The Times quoted a senior commander source as saying the captain was assaulted after asking his colleague to record data - including passenger numbers on board - before take-off. The Delhi-Jaipur
flight took place despite the row, and staff were told of the incident after landing. The confrontation came a few days after the Indian Commercial Pilots Association wrote to the Director General of Civil Aviation complaining of the high stress levels facing pilots. The ICPA`s letter read: “Putting these
highly-stressed and financially over-burdened co-pilots in the same cockpit is a perfect recipe for disaster. “At times of equipment malfunction, turbulence or emergency, a pilot must remain calm. How can an Air India pilot perform his duties in such a manner when he is already highlystressed?”
business. Following the second de-merger in 2000, BG Group developed a portfolio of major gas assets in key countries such as Egypt, Trinidad and Tobago, and Kazakhstan as well as the UK’s North Sea line. Last month, British Chancellor George Osborne lowered the supplementary corporation tax levied against oil companies that operate in the North Sea. The BG Group warned in February that it would write down the value of its oil and gas assets by nearly £6bn ($9bn) because of the oil price slump. Similarly, Shell announced in January that it would be cutting spending by nearly £10bn over the next three years. As it announced the takeover bid, Shell said it expected to make asset sales totalling $30bn between 2016 and 2018, although it did not specify which assets it was reviewing for sale. Of potential job losses in the North Sea, Shell and BG Group said they expected “global synergies”, adding that if the deal had not happened, they might both have had to make job cuts. Current BG Group
chief executive Helge Lund, who took up the post last month, will remain there while the deal goes through, but is expected to leave on completion. BG Group chairman Andrew Gould said his board remained confident in the energy firm’s long-term prospects under Mr Lund. But he said of the Shell offer: “It allows us to accelerate and de-risk the delivery of this value.” The payout Mr Lund is likely to receive, alongside a huge boost from his BG Group shareholdings, is eye-watering! In December, BG’s board revised Mr Lund’s proposed £12m upfront shares bonus, after shareholders and the Institute of Directors complained. Analysts gave a mixed reaction to news of the deal. Investec analyst Neil Morton said a tieup had “been mooted for about 20 years”. He added: “BG investors receive what we see as a compelling offer. For Shell shareholders, we are less convinced of the merits. “The deal is predicated on a strong recovery in oil prices ($90 per barrel from 2018), while we suspect that Shell is pouncing on BG’s imminent free cash-flow to protect its burdensome dividend payout.” Christian Stadler, associate professor of strategic management at Warwick Business School, said BG would fit well with Shell’s portfolio. “Shell has a good track record in offshore oil and gas fields, and BG will help them solidify this area” he said. He added that acquiring BG would help Shell’s replacement ratio: the amount of oil fields Shell has lined up to replace the oil it is currently producing. But he warned that cost savings would be hard to achieve. “With the current downsizing in the oil industry, you would expect some job losses,” he added.
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10th April - 16th April 2015
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CaixaBank launches HolaBank, seeking to establish itself as leader among international clients in Spain CAIXABANK has unveiled a new business line aimed at international clients, seeking to establish the bank as the leading financial provider to this group.
The bank, overseen by Chairman Isidro Fainé and CEO Gonzalo Gortázar, has thus set up the HolaBank brand. This is a new service model, tailored to the international clients, featuring 100 branches staffed by experts in international banking and high-value financial guidance. It also offers a portfolio of financial and nonfinancial products and services to address the specific needs of such clients. HolaBank is aimed at international clients who have bought or rent property in Spain, residing in the country permanently or over part of the year. These tend to be families who have bought holiday
homes, investors, business people, professionals or retirees. They are usually of European origin, but also from elsewhere in the world, and have moved to Spain for business or leisure purposes. CaixaBank currently serves 375,000 clients in
this segment, generating business volumes standing at six billion euros (figures as of February 2015). By setting up this business line, CaixaBank aims to secure market penetration of 25% among international customers over the next
four years, in line with the bank’s 2015-2018 strategic plan. Juan Antonio Alcaraz, Chief Business Officer at CaixaBank and a leader in innovation and service quality, said: “HolaBank will allow CaixaBank to bolster its relationship with this
group of clients, who have highly-specific demands and require an innovative, comprehensive and high-quality range of products and services.” He added: “By stepping up our focus on this client segment, we will fortify CaixaBank’s leadership in retail banking in Spain.” HolaBank will initially include 100 branches in Malaga (16), Alicante (16), Murcia (5), the Balearic Islands (38), Las Palmas (12) and Tenerife (13), covering 72 municipalities. As well as specialised customer service, provided by multi-lingual account managers, documentation at these branches will also be available in several languages. These branches will be rebranded to ensure they are easily recognisable to clients. This new CaixaBank service features an extensive catalogue of savings and financing products, designed specifically with this group in mind, as well as a broad portfolio of high-value, non-financial services.
These include the socalled Living Solutions Plan, providing legal guidance in multiple languages, telephone healthcare assistance in multiple languages, online translators and interpreters, free registration with utilities, personal assistance and emergency home support under special circumstances, among others. They will also be able to benefit from discounts and promotions at restaurants, and an exclusive telephone service line, available 365 days a year. The www.holabank.es website will be available to international customers, featuring the full range of HolaBank services in English, German, French, Spanish and Catalan. They will also be able to contact account managers directly in their own language. CaixaBank Corporate Communications and External Relations Department Tel: +34 93 404 7594 prensa@ lacaixa.es http://prensa. lacaixa.es/caixabank
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Legal Matters
By Mariano Zunino Siri
AS I have stated in previous columns, unless you are living in an independent villa or house, you are living in a Community of Owners, regulated by the Horizontal Division Law (or Horizontal Property Law).
Although your apartment is private, there are common areas such as alleys, lifts, stairs and garden which belong to all the owners (percentage-wise) and need a budget to cover maintenance, cleaning, supervision, etc. I have mentioned different aspects of the Community of Owners before, and this week I will refer to the representatives of the Com-
10th April - 16th April 2015
The community of owners: Authorities munity. The Annual General Meeting (AGM) composed of all the owners, is the main authority, and owners are required to elect Community representatives - President, Vice-President, Secretary and Administrator). Legally, there must be an AGM every year to approve the accounts and the following year’s budget, plus vote on various other issues. It is important to point out that owners in debt to the Community can attend the meeting but do not have the right to vote. Depending on the importance of the matter, the Law mentions three different types of vote: *Unanimity vote *Simple majority vote *3/5 majority vote Different roles in the Community The President is the legal representative of the Community of Owners
and has to be co-owner. He is entitled to deal with bank transactions, contracts and can carry out legal actions on behalf of the Community of Owners (Comunidad). The Horizontal Division Law states that the Comunidad must designate one. President Normally elected or re-elected at the AGM
although, in some cases, appointed by rotation. Among his responsibilities , President can: *Take legal action that has been approved by a General Meeting *Represent the Comunidad in relation to matters concerning individual members *Represent the Comunidad in matters related to third parties or com-
panies, such as electricity and water suppliers *Call General Meetings, etc. Vice-President In 2003, an update of the Horizontal Division Law introduced the role of Vice-President, but this appointment is not specific or mandatory. He/she replaces the President in his absence. Administrator
The administrator is elected by a majority vote during a general meeting. The duration of the term is typically one year. Among his legal responsibilities are: *Supervision and management of the Community *Installations and services *Budget proposal to be approved by the Community at AGM *Make the necessary payments *Collect payments from the owners and execute the works decided on by the Community *Keep the Community documents (acts, bills). The administrator does not have to be an owner and normally charges a monthly fee. This figure is important because as a non-owner, the Administrator can deal with small (or big) problems between neighbours, while avoiding personal contact.
Rules about mobility scooters and the powered wheelchairs OUR mailbox has been stuffed with stories about the increase in the number of scooters on the pavements and walkways. We asked N332 - daily reports from Spanish traffic police - to clear up a few myths and set a few things straight.
1. You don’t need a licence to drive a mobility scooter or powered wheelchair 2. You can’t drive them in bus lanes, “cycle-only” lanes or motorways 3. All normal parking restrictions apply to mobility scooters and powered wheelchairs 4. All vehicles can be used on footpaths,
pavements, bridleways, and in pedestrian areas. They should be used on the road only if a pavement is not available 5. A mobility vehicle does not have to be registered in Spain
6. It is not a legal requirement to have insurance for a mobility vehicle, it is strongly advised that people take out insurance to cover personal safety, other people’s safety and the value of the
vehicle. In some cases your household insurance may provide cover, but check this with your insurance company. You will have to pay compensation if you have an accident and it was your fault.
7. You don’t have to pay vehicle tax for any mobility scooter or powered wheelchair. 8. Mobility vehicles designed to carry two people cannot be used on the pavement or road because they don’t meet the definition of an invalid carriage in law. With regard to children, the law does not explicitly state that an adult carrying an infant in a sling/pouch is unlawful. However, it is not permitted to carry anyone else on a mobility vehicle - children standing on the vehicle, for example 9. The law says the driver cannot carry people if there is only one seat (we have seen people sat on the driver’s legs), but if there are vehicles prepared with another seat, this will be possible. But they can be used
on the pavement. Each Town Hall has its own regulations, so it can legislate to force these two-seater vehicles to use the streets in some pedestrian areas for space reasons. Imagine in the summer, with Las Americas full of people and with many two-seater mobility scooters all together in the same place. It could be a chaos. Otherwise, it will be impossible for this vehicle to drive on certain kind of pavements because of its size. 10. One final tip: when using a mobility scooter, always have your disabled card, and carry it always on the scooter with you. This is not a vehicle for tourists to go for a ride and avoid paying for parking, but a vehicle for people who really need it.
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Business
10th April - 16th April 2015
How to invest in a volatile market By Laura Mann
of Blacktower Financial Management (International) Limited.
I AM often asked by clients looking to invest in stocks and shares about the best time to buy and sell stocks to make the most profit.
Many of them do not understand the risks involved when purchasing certain stocks - and in the volatile market place we currently find ourselves in, my advice is: leave it to the experts! With this in mind, I would like to introduce you to the Nexus Portfolio Range: two exclusive portfolios to Blacktower Financial Management (International) Limited clients. The Portfolio Managers are Quilter Chevi-
ot, part of Old Mutual Wealth – a FTSE 100 Company They employ over 500 people, including 163 investment professionals, and are regulated by the FCA. They manage over £16.7bn on behalf of their clients, who include private individuals, pensions and charities. They offer our clients a bespoke, unique, flexible, asset allocation and stock selection. Their investment philosophy meets the challenges of a dynamic market environment, combining the skills of a dedicated research team and experienced investment managers. They believe that the best results come from a mix of investment styles, adapted to the market cycle. Nexus Global Solutions Portfolio This is for your more conservative investor. The fund-manager’s approach to investment combines strong
valuation disciplines with a long-term selective framework. The fund holds Bonds Gilts and ETF’s and offers an investment with low volatility. The performance year to date for the Global Solutions portfolio is 5.16%. Nexus Global Dynamic Portfolio This is for the more
adventurous investor, who requires enhanced returns. The Dynamic portfolio is an activelymanaged, globally-diversified equity portfolio. The aim is for Capital Growth, and current holdings include GlaxoSmythKline, Apple, Royal Dutch Shell and Legal and General. The performance year to
date for the Dynamic portfolio is 8.21%. For many of our clients, a combination of the portfolios works well, achieving returns and offering exposure to many equities, while removing the decision of buying and selling from the client, which can often prove quite stressful in a volatile
market. If you have over £50,000 and would like advice on how to invest to achieve the most out of your funds, please contact Laura Mann on +34 603 217 561 | info@ blacktowerfm.com The above does not constitute advice; you must seek Independent Financial Advice before making any decision to invest monies. Investments can go up and down and as such are not guaranteed. Past performance is not a guide to future performance, and references to specific securities are not recommendations to buy or sell those securities. Blacktower Financial Management (International) Limited is licensed by the Gibraltar Financial Services Commission. Licence 00805B. Blacktower Financial Management Limited is authorised and regulated by the UK Financial Conduct Authority.
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10th April - 16th April 2015
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Guide
Saturday 11th April, ITV1, 20.00
Don't Miss...
From a hypnotising dog to a girl with a hula hoop that defies gravity, a burlesque troop with a twist and a man playing music on a comb, it can mean only one thing…Britain’s Got Talent is back! Returning to our screens with the king of entertainment Simon Cowell, the joker of the pack David Walliams, alongside the one who’s seen it all, Amanda Holden and the queen of cool, Alesha Dixon, the popular judging panel have been stunned, entertained and moved to tears on their hunt for the best talent around. They are joined by the nation’s favourite TV duo Ant and Dec, who are on hand to encourage the acts and to congratulate or commiserate with them following their auditions. The lucky act who is crowned the winner in the live grand final will secure a life changing cash prize of £250,000 and the opportunity to perform at this year’s The Royal Variety Performance.
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TV Guide
Slow Train Through Africa with Griff Rhys Jones
ITV1, 21.00 In episode one, Griff begins a 1700-mile journey across North Africa in Morocco. His North African train ride takes him east on a line that links the great trading cities of Morocco, Algeria and Tunisia with the Mediterranean on one side and the Sahara on the other. From Tunis, Griff will head South towards the desert and final destination of Tozeur. He begins his journey in the city of Marrakech, where he stocks up for his trip with items from the souk, including some traditional Berber medicines. Griff says: “I love Morocco. I love the feeling of being on the cusp of Africa here. What could be more authentic, you see? What could be more Moroccan, than a cup of mint tea? Except that tea was introduced by the English when they took over Tangiers and it comes all the way from China. So, whenever you’re in Africa, the idea that we are coming here on this huge journey to look for the ‘real’ Africa is nonsense. You never find the real Africa, what you find is the mix that created Africa from way back.” Griff boards the train for his seven-hour journey to Fes and keen to make friends, he shares some sweet pastries with his fellow passengers and discovers that one is a travelling salesman for Berber medicines. He sells Griff some more remedies including a stick that doubles as a toothbrush, although Griff politely declines the offer of some brown paste used to treat worms. In the ancient city of Fes, Griff enlists the help of possibly Morocco’s most eccentric guide, Abdul, to ensure he doesn’t get lost in the medieval streets and medinas. Griff says: “This is a bit spooky isn’t it? The whole city is like a maze which ends in dead ends and that was for defensive purposes. As you go along, you come to these huge gates and they could shut off whole quarters. The actual gates of the city of Fez were locked every night up until the 1960s.” Abdul takes Griff to learn more about the art of leather-making, one of the cities oldest crafts. The leather is washed several times and then soaked in a mixture of lime and cows urine. Griff attempts to help the artisans but nearly throws up in the process. Griff continues his journey along the railway built by French colonialists but as the border between Morocco and Algeria is currently closed, he must embark on an enormous dog-leg, going all the way to Spain before flying back to North Africa and the Algerian port of Oran. He explains: “Ever since Independence, Morocco and Algeria, they’re still very grumpy about the border. They keep saying they going to get this sorted out but not before I have to get on the train in Algeria.” After his de-tour, Griff arrives in Algeria. The largest country in Africa boasts magnificent railway stations and hospitable, friendly people. Griff admits: “I was nervous about coming to Oran, I’ll confess that. Because there has been a lot of trouble in Algeria and Oran itself has been a centre of contention ever since the 1960’s. Basically the war of independence that cost a million lives pretty much started here when they raided the bank and they stole 3 million francs to pay for weapons.” From Oran on the Mediterranean coast the next stage of the journey takes Griff 300 miles to the capital Algiers. The French-built train is modern and comfortable and en route Griff meets a family heading to Algiers for a holiday. On arriving, Griff learns how to cook cous cous the Algerian way inside a beautiful old merchant’s house within the medina. He then ventures to the east of the country and the breath-taking city of Constantine, named after the Roman Emperor, before crossing into Tunisia.
10th April - 16th April 2015
F riday 06:00 ...................... Breakfast 09:15 ......... Neighbourhood Blues 10:00 ...... Homes Under the Hammer 11:00 ...........The Sheriffs are Coming 11:45 ................. Fake Britain 12:15.............. Bargain Hunt 13:00...... BBC News at One 13:45 ......................The Edge 14:30 ...............Escape to the Country 15:30 ......Home Away From Home 16:15........................... Flog It! 17:15....................... Pointless 18:00..... BBC News at Six 19:00 .......The One Show 19:30......... A Question of Sport 20:00 ............ EastEnders 20:30........... MasterChef 21:00..... Have I Got News for You 21:30..Mrs. Brown’s Boys 22:00.... BBC News at Ten 22:35............ The Graham Norton Show 23:25.Would I Lie to You? 23:55..............EastEnders Omnibus
06:15 ...... Homes Under the Hammer 07:15.Flog it! Trade Secrets 08:15 ...... Gardeners’ World 08:45 ......Helicopter Heroes Down Under 09:15... Victoria Derbyshire 11:00 .....................BBC News 12:00 .......The Daily Politics 13:00 ...................A to Z of TV Gardening 13:05 .... Cagney and Lacey 13:50 .................Animal Park 14:25............. Spring Kitchen with Tom Kerridge 15:10 .........Floyd on France 15:40 ..............Are You Being Served? 16:10.......................Allo, ‘Allo! 16:40 ...................... Hi-De-Hi! 17:15... Antiques Roadshow 18:00 .............. Eggheads 18:30................. Antiques Roadshow 19:00.........................Golf W 20:00..An Island Parish Coi ch ce 20:30...Gardeners’ World 21:00 ............ Sex and the Church 22:00.................The Clare Balding Show 22:30..............Newsnight
06:00 ............ Good Morning Britain 08:30 ........................ Lorraine 09:25.......... The Jeremy Kyle Show 10:30.............. This Morning 12:30.......................... O’Brien 13:30 .............. ITV News and Weather 14:00 .............. Judge Rinder 15:00.......... Dickinson’s Real Deal 16:00.............. Tipping Point 17:00 ....................The Chase 18:00.. ITV News London 18:20 ........ Party Election Broadcast 18:30......... ITV News and Weather 19:00............ Emmerdale 19:30..Coronation Street 20:00 ...... Barging Round Britain with John Sergeant 20:30..Coronation Street 21:00............Slow Train W C Through Africa with choice Griff Rhys-Jones 22:00 ..... ITV News at Ten and Weather 22:40............. First Blood
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TV Guide
10th April - 16th April 2015
1 0 th
23 CW
A pril CW o i ce ch
06:00 .................Countdown 06:45 ..............3rd Rock from the Sun 07:10 ..............3rd Rock from the Sun 07:35 ........Everybody Loves Raymond 08:00 ................The Morning Line 09:00........................... Frasier 09:25............... Four in a Bed 10:30 ................... Come Dine with Me 11:00 ................... Come Dine with Me 11:30................... Come Dine with Me 12:00 ......... Channel 4 News Summary 12:05................... Come Dine with Me 12:40................... Come Dine with Me 13:10 ..........Jamie’s Comfort Food 13:45 .....................The Grand National Festival 17:00................Four in a Bed 17:30.................... Coach Trip 18:00 ....... The Simpsons 18:30............... Hollyoaks 19:00 ..................Channel 4 News 19:30 ............Unreported World 19:55........ Party Election Broadcast 20:00.................. Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. 21:00 ............ Gogglebox 22:00 ............... Alan Carr: Chatty Man 23:10 ................ Brooklyn Nine-Nine 23:40.............. Showgirls
06:00 ............. The Wotwots! 06:10 .................Igam Ogam 06:20 .............. Fireman Sam 06:30 ................Toot the Tiny Tugboat 06:45 .....................Peppa Pig 06:50 .....................Peppa Pig 06:55 ......................Pip Ahoy! 07:10............. Little Princess 07:20 ....The Mr. Men Show 07:35 ..........................Thomas and Friends 07:50 ......Noddy in Toyland 08:00 ........... Ben and Holly’s Little Kingdom 08:15 .....................Peppa Pig 08:25..................... Peppa Pig 08:35......... Toby’s Travelling Circus 08:45.. Bananas in Pajamas 08:55 ... Milkshake Monkey 09:00 ...................Tickety Toc 09:15 ........ The Wright Stuff 11:10 ...................... The Hotel Inspector Returns 12:10.....5 News Lunchtime 12:15............ Can’t Pay? We’ll Take it Away: Final Demand 13:15 ........Home and Away 13:45 .................Neighbours 14:15 ..... NCIS: Los Angeles 15:15 ...................Virtual Lies 17:00 ..................5 News at 5 17:30 .................Neighbours 18:00.... Home and Away 18:30..... 5 News Tonight 18:55........ Party Election Broadcast on Behalf of the Scottish National Party 19:00.. The Gadget Show 20:00..... Secrets of Great British Castles 21:00.NCIS: New Orleans 22:00........................NCIS 22:55.......Law and Order: Special Victims Unit 23:50 ....True Crimes: The First 72 Hours
06:00 ..............Life’s Funniest Moments 06:20 ............................. Psych 07:05 ..................Emmerdale 08:10 ................. You’ve Been Framed! 08:35 ................ Dinner Date 09:35.............. Ben and Kate 10:00................ Up All Night 10:25............................. Psych 11:20.................. Royal Pains 12:15.................. Emmerdale 13:15.................. You’ve Been Framed! 13:45 ................ Dinner Date 14:40 ......... The Jeremy Kyle Show 18:00 ........... You’ve Been Framed! 20:00 .......Two and a Half Men 21:00.. The Back-Up Plan 23:15 ..........Take Me Out 00:25 ...............Two and a Half Men
06:15..................... Babylon 5 07:00................ Doctor Who 08:00 ...................MasterChef Australia 09:00........................... The Bill 11:00... My Flat-Pack Home 12:00......... The Hairy Bikers’ Food Tour of Britain 13:00 ..............James Martin: Yorkshire’s Finest 14:00 ..............Tipping Point 15:00... My Flat-Pack Home 16:00............... Escape to the Country 17:00 ................ Doctor Who 18:00 ............ Road Patrol Australia 19:00................. Dynamo: Magician Impossible 20:00 ......... Resurrection 21:00.......... World’s Most Talented 22:00.....Daddy Day Care 00:00............ Traffic Cops
08:55 ....Location, Location, Location
06:00 .............. The Real A&E
07:00 ..............Radical Highs
06:00 .......WWE Main Event
06:30 .............. The Real A&E
07:15 ................. Traffic Cops
07:00.......... SPFL Round Up
07:00 ..........Dog the Bounty Hunter
08:05....................... Top Gear
07:30.......... Premier League Darts
08:00 ....Greggs: More Than Meats the Pie
11:00 ............... Three Men in Another Boat
09:00 ..... NCIS: Los Angeles
12:00....................... Top Gear
10:00 ..... NCIS: Los Angeles
14:00........ Storage Hunters
11:00 ..............Hawaii Five-0
14:30 ................. Traffic Cops
12:00 ..............Hawaii Five-0
15:30 ........ Storage Hunters
13:00 ..... NCIS: Los Angeles
16:00 ............... Three Men in Another Boat
15:00 .. The Holidaymakers 16:00...................... Futurama 17:00 .............The Simpsons 17:30 ..................... Futurama 18:30 ....... The Simpsons 20:00... Relatively Clever 21:00 ..................... Stella 22:00......... Hawaii Five-0 23:00......... Hawaii Five-0 01:00......... Hawaii Five-0
10:00 ........ Storage Hunters
17:00 .......................Top Gear 19:00 ... Storage Hunters 21:00 ...... Not Going Out 22:20..... Mock the Week 23:00........................... QI
10:00.....Location, Location, Location 11:10 ............ Hugh’s 3 Good Things 11:20 ... Hachi: A Dog’s Tale 13:10................... Time Team 15:20 .....A Place in the Sun: Home or Away 17:25 ...... Jamie’s 15 Minute Meals 17:55....Come Dine with Me 19:00... Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares USA 19:55....... Grand Designs 21:00........... Dorian Gray 23:15..................24 Hours in A and E 00:20... Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares USA 01:20.............. Come Dine with Me
11:00 ...............The F1 Show 12:00 ....... IRB Sevens World Series Rugby Highlights 12:30 ..................The Premier League Years 16:30 ..........SPFL Round Up 17:00 .....Football Freestyler 2 Year 2014 17:30.......... Premier League 100 Club 18:00 ........Football Gold 19:30 .................Football
00:20..... 8 Out of 10 Cats
23:00 ..................Barclays Premier League Preview
00:55.... Storage Hunters
23:30 ..........The F1 Show
01:25...Lizard Lick Towing
00:30 ........ Super League Highlights
23:40 ..... Mock the Week
01:50....... Not Going Out
An Island Parish BBC2, 20:00
Falklands. Tis the Season. Series following the community on the Falkland Islands, a British territory 8,000 miles south of the UK in the middle of the South Atlantic Ocean. It’s Christmas on the Falklands - high summer. The islanders are singing carols and preparing their traditional Falklands roast lamb, but there’s one important person missing. The Rev Richard and his wife Jen have sailed 800 miles east to celebrate the big day in the furthest corner of his parish, the tiny island of South Georgia. Back in Stanley, the Christmas elves are wrapping presents for Flying Santa to deliver to the children on the most remote farms and settlements, and the owners of the fastest horses on the islands are converging on the racecourse ready for the annual Boxing Day races, where veteran jockey Ron Binnie is making his 50th appearance alongside his grandson Duane.
CW 24
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TV Guide
10th April - 16th April 2015
S aturday 06:00 ...................... Breakfast
06:15 .................Animal Park
10:00........................ Saturday Kitchen Live
06:45 ........... The Magic Box
06:00 ......... Bottom Knocker Street
08:30 .............The Man From Laramie
06:10 ......... Bottom Knocker Street
10:10 ...............Fred Dibnah’s Magnificent Monuments
06:20 ......... Bottom Knocker Street
11:30 ..... Mary Berry Cooks 12:00 .....................BBC News 12:10 ............Football Focus 12:50 ........................Saturday Sportsday 13:00.............. F1: Grand Prix Qualifying 14:15 ................................ Golf 15:30 .............. Bargain Hunt 16:15............. The Boat Race
10:40 ...............Fred Dibnah’s Magnificent Monuments
07:00.............. Share a Story:
12:00 ..........Food and Drink
07:10..............................Sooty
18:35.............. BBC News 18:45 .BBC London News
13:30........ A Taste of Britain
18:55 ................Pointless
14:00 ...........................Flog It!
19:45...................Atlantis
14:40 ........ The Philadelphia Story 16:30 ...................Final Score
21:20 ................ Casualty
17:30 ........... Kew on a Plate
22:10.............. BBC News
18:30...Gardeners’ World
22:30... Match of the Day
19:00 ............Dad’s Army
23:55 .......... The Football League Show
19:30 ........................Golf
01:15 ..... Weather for the Week Ahead
00:00............. The Private Lives of Pippa Lee
01:20............... BBC News
01:30................ Free Men
W C ch o i ce
06:45...........Dino Dan: Trek’s Adventures
11:10 ....................The Nature of Britain 12:30 .............. Michel Roux’s Service
20:30.......... The National Lottery: In It to Win It
06:35...........Dino Dan: Trek’s Adventures
Get Creative 07:25............... Share a Story 07:30 ..................Scrambled! 07:35 ..................... Nerds and Monsters 08:00 ...............Thunderbirds are Go 08:30................Horrid Henry 08:50 ................Hulk and the Agents of S.M.A.S.H 09:25.......... The Jeremy Kyle Show 10:25 ......... The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:25 ......... The Jeremy Kyle Show 12:30 .............. ITV News and Weather
Ninja Warrior UK ITV1, 19.00
12:40.......... The Jeremy Kyle Show 13:40................ Scooby-Doo 15:20.. The Unforgettable...
16:05.........................Big Star’s Little Star Ninja Warrior, the toughest obstacle course on television is coming 17:05 .......Off Their Rockers to ITV this spring. 17:30 ..... ITV News London Already a smash hit in the USA, Sweden, 17:45 .............. ITV News and Malaysia and Japan, Ninja Warrior UK will Weather be hosted by Ben Shephard, Rochelle Humes and Chris Kamara. This brand new 18:00 ........... You’ve Been entertainment series is the ultimate test of Framed! strength, speed and courage. Viewers will 19:00....................Ninja CW watch contestants pushed to their limits Warriors UK choice as they compete to complete TV’s toughest 20:00................... Britain’s challenge. Got Talent Contestants from all walks of life ranging 21:20..................Play to CW from ‘Have a Go Heroes’ to ‘Superhuman the Whistle choice Athletes’ are invited to take on the challenges of the course. Viewers will be entertained 22:05................ ITV News by both those who can superbly execute 22:20............... Backdraft the course to those who spectacularly fail, crashing out of the course into the water below. Each part is laden with jaw-dropping challenges, heart-stopping excitement and adrenaline-fuelled action as the contestants attempt to complete three punishing and potentially hilarious stages. 250 ambitious competitors will start but few will successfully overcome the toughest obstacle course ever seen on British Television. Can any survive to the end to face the vertical challenge of scaling the heights of an impressive scaling tower named, Mount Midoriyama, and be crowned the first ‘Ninja Warrior UK’ Asif Zubairy, ITV’s Commissioning Editor for Entertainment said: “We are thrilled to be bringing Ninja Warrior to the UK. This exciting new format will showcase some inspirational achievements as well as hilarious mishaps on what promises to be the toughest course on TV.” Ninja Warrior UK is a Potato production for ITV. The series was commissioned by Elaine Bedell, ITV’s Director of Entertainment and Comedy and Asif Zubairy Commissioning Editor, Entertainment, ITV. The executive producers are Michael Kelpie, Martin Scott and Simon Marsh, Potato.
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TV Guide
10th April - 16th April 2015
aturday
1 1 th
05:40 .............. The Common Denominator 06:10........... How I Met Your Mother 06:35 ..........King of Queens 07:00 ..........King of Queens 07:25 ........Mobil 1 The Grid 08:00..................... The Grand National Morning Line 10:00 .......................Weekend Brunch - From the Grand National 13:00...........The Grand National Live From Aintree Nick Luck introduces Channel 4’s coverage of the world’s greatest steeplechase from Aintree - the race that stops a nation. Forty runners line up to tackle the famous Grand National fences - Becher’s Brook, Canal Turn, Valentine’s Brook, and The Chair - to try to add their name to one of the most famous rolls of honour in sport. The first National in 1839 was appropriately won by a horse named Lottery, and what a story it would be for 2015 if AP McCoy could ride his second winner on his last ever ride in the race. In the build up, there are four other top races at 1.30, 2.05, 2.50 and 3.25pm, plus features, interviews and live reports from our team, which includes Gok Wan and Frankie Dettori.
17:15 .........Celebrity Fifteen to One 18:15.... Channel 4 News 18:40....... Independence Day 21:20........ I Give it a Year 23:20...............Sean Lock: Purple Van Man 00:25 ........ 24 Hour Party People
06:00..................... Peppa Pig 06:05 ....................Bananas in Pajamas 06:15 ......................Milkshake Monkey 06:20 ........................Angelina Ballerina 06:35 ......................Pip Ahoy! 06:45 ...........................The Mr. Men Show 07:00............. Chloe’s Closet 07:10................ Roobarb and Custard Too 07:20 ...............Make Way for Noddy 07:30 ....................Paw Patrol 07:40 ............. Little Princess 07:55........... Wanda and the Alien 08:05 .................... Milkshake! Bop Box 08:10 .........Zack and Quack 08:25 ...........Bert and Ernie’s Great Adventures 08:30 ........... Ben and Holly’s Little Kingdom 08:45 ...................Jelly Jamm 09:05..................... LazyTown 09:30....... Dora and Friends 10:00 .........Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 10:35 .........................The Dog Rescuers 11:05......................... Ice Road Truckers 12:05......................... Ice Road Truckers 13:05......................... Ice Road Truckers 14:05...................... Columbo 16:00 ..............Columbo: The Most Crucial Game 17:30 ............Most Shocking Talent Show Moments 20:10... 5 News Weekend 20:15 .......................NCIS 21:10 .......................NCIS 22:10 ....CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 23:05................... Britain’s Favourite Detectives 01:50..........Super Casino
A pril
06:00 ...................Emmerdale Omnibus
06:10........................... The Bill
08:55 ...River Cottage Bites
07:00 .......................... The Bill
08:35 ...... Coronation Street Omnibus
09:25................... Time Team
08:00 .......................... The Bill
10:20 ...................Time Team
11:00............... Ant and Dec’s Saturday Night Takeaway
10:00 ............... Walking with Monsters: Life Before Dinosaurs
11:25 ......................The Three Musketeers
12:30............ Totally Bonkers Guinness World Records
10:30......................... Sea City
14:05 ...............Four in a Bed
13:00...................Britain’s Got More Talent
12:00 ............... Resurrection
16:00 ....................... Mr. Bean
11:00 ............... Resurrection 13:00 .................Who Do You Think You Are?
17:10........................... E.T. The Extra-Terrestrial
14:00....... Undercover Boss
19:30 .......... Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure
19:00............ Traffic Cops
15:00 .......Undercover Boss
21:20 ........... Britain’s Got More Talent
20:00.......The Funny Side of Animals
22:20 ...... Celebrity Juice
21:00.... Daddy Day Care
23:05 .................. Britain’s Got Talent
23:00....Emergency Bikers
00:30 ........... Britain’s Got More Talent
00:00 ...... Deals From the Dark Side 01:00 ....Planet Dinosaur
01:30......... Hell’s Kitchen
01:50 .........A Gifted Man
06:00 ......... Are You Smarter Than a 10 Year Old? 07:00 ....................Road Wars 08:00...................The Fantasy Football Club 09:00.... Football’s Funniest Moments 09:30......... Fast and Furious Special 10:00 ................. Soccer A.M. 12:00............... The F1 Show 13:00....... Driving School of Mum and Dad 13:30 .............. The Real A&E 14:00 ............. RSPCA Animal Rescue 15:00............Modern Family 17:00 ................. Wild Things 18:00 ..... Modern Family 18:30........ The Simpsons 19:00. NCIS: Los Angeles 20:00 ........ Hawaii Five-0 21:00 ...................Con Air 23:15 ..... Karl Pilkington: The Moaning of Life 00:15......... Hawaii Five-0
07:10 ...................Bush Pilots 08:00 .......................Top Gear 09:00 .......................Top Gear 10:00 ...... American Pickers 11:00........ Storage Hunters 11:30........ Storage Hunters 12:00 .... Lizard Lick Towing 12:30 .....................Lizard Lick Towing 13:00 ....Red Bull Rampage 14:00...... American Pickers 15:00...... American Pickers 17:00 ........ Storage Hunters 17:30 ........ Storage Hunters 18:00 ... Storage Hunters
13:30................Four in a Bed 14:35 ...............Four in a Bed 15:05 ...............Four in a Bed 16:10 .................. Great Canal Journeys 17:15 .Come Dine with Me 19:55............. Father Ted 21:00..... 8 Out of 10 Cats Does Countdown 22:00.... Greg Davies: The Back of My Mum’s Head 23:05......... Embarrassing Bodies 00:05 ............. Father Ted 01:05 ..... 8 Out of 10 Cats Does Countdown
06:00..................... Sky Sports Originals 07:00................... Viral Videos of 2014 07:30 .........Barclays Premier League Review 08:00......................... Football Freestyler 08:30 ....................Mini Game Changers 10:00 ................. Soccer A.M. 12:00 ........................ Football 14:30 ..............Pro 12 Rugby 16:45 ..............Ford Saturday Night Football
20:00.. Would I Lie to You?
20:00.............. SNF: Game of the Day
22:00.... Russell Howard’s Good News
22:00 .............SNF: Match Choice
23:00...........Eddie Izzard: Force Majeure - Live
23:30............. SNF: Match Choice
00:20....................Would I Lie to You?
01:00 .............SNF: Match Choice
25 CW
W C ch o i ce
Play To The Whistle ITV1, 21.20
Hosted by Holly Willoughby, Play To The Whistle is a comedy entertainment show with sport at its heart. Launching with team captains Frank Lampard and Bradley Walsh, Play To The Whistle will feature the very best names in comedy and sport. Frank and Bradley will don their captain’s armbands and will be joined by the very best global talent and the funniest comedians to play on their teams – the only criteria being that losing simply isn’t an option. Each weekly fixture will see the opponents battle it out and prove their sporting prowess to find out who really knows their Tom Daleys from their Daley Thompsons. Seann Walsh will be acting as the series’ comic umpire as both teams simply… Play To The Whistle. Whether using their encyclopaedic sporting knowledge, their funny bones or physical skills, each round is only completed at the sound of Holly’s whistle.
CW 26
W C ch o i ce
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TV Guide
The Olivier Awards 2015 ITV1, 22.15
ITV is the official television broadcast partner of 39th Olivier Awards with MasterCard, the UK’s most prestigious honours, which take place at the Royal Opera House, hosted by Lenny Henry, on Sunday 12th April. The biggest and most spectacular evening in London’s theatrical calendar, the star-studded awards promise illustrious names and incredible performances from some of the biggest shows currently in the West End. ITV will be screening an Olivier Awards 2015 highlights programme broadcast on the night, shortly following the ceremony. Star nominees include Nicole Scherzinger, James McAvoy, Gemma Arterton, Richard Armitage, Tim Piggott-Smith, Beverley Knight, Gillian Anderson, Kristin Scott Thomas, Imelda Staunton and Penelope Wilton. Categories on the night include the coveted This Morning Audience Award, the only award voted for by the public, which sees Billy Elliott The Musical, Matilda The Musical, Jersey Boys and Wicked go head to head. Last year’s ceremony saw popular musical The Book of Mormon scoop four awards, with Les Miserables taking home the Audience Award.
10th April - 16th April 2015
S unday 07:30...... Match of the Day
06:00................. Great British Garden Revival
09:00 .......The Andrew Marr Show
07:00 .................. Countryfile 08:00 ...... Gardeners’ World
10:00..... The Big Questions
08:30.......... The Beechgrove Garden
06:00...................... Breakfast
11:00 .......... Sunday Politics 12:15 .............. MOTD2 Extra 13:00 .....................BBC News 13:15 .............. Bargain Hunt 14:00 .............F1: Grand Prix 15:55 ...............Escape to the Country
09:00 .................The Football League Show 10:20........ Saturday Kitchen Best Bites 11:50..................Back in Time for Dinner 12:50 ....... A Taste of Britain
16:25 .............Points of View
13:20....................... Triathlon
16:40.......... Songs of Praise
14:50.............. Little Women
17:15....................... Pointless
16:50........................... Flog It!
18:05 .............. BBC News 18:20... BBC London News 18:30 ............Countryfile 19:30 ........... MasterChef 20:00................. Antiques Roadshow 21:00 ..................Poldark 22:00 .............. BBC News 22:20... BBC London News
23:30 ......The Last Castle
17:30..........Penguins on a CW Plane: Great choice Animal Move
01:35 ..... Weather for the Week Ahead
18:30........................ Golf 00:00.............. First Snow
01:40 .............. BBC News
01:35 ............Countryfile
22:30..................Match of the Day 2
Vera ITV1, 20.00 When the remains of a teenage girl are found half-buried in a Northumberland wood, DCI Vera Stanhope (Brenda Blethyn) and her team find themselves investigating a thirty-year old mystery. The remains are identified as those of miner’s daughter Carrie Telling, who vanished during the strike clashes in 1984. A politically minded, rebellious teen, her father Bill (George Costigan) insisted Carrie would never run away but his protests fell on deaf ears. The case brings Vera back in contact with her old boss, John Warrick (Daragh O’Malley) who is shocked to learn he may have dropped the ball. Like everyone else, he had assumed that the young girl had run away to London after problems at home. Carrie went missing at a time when tension between the police and locals was at an all time high but is that enough reason for the murder of a young woman go unnoticed? A credit card discovered on the remains leads Vera to a clothes company run by Arjun Banerjee (Nasser Memarzia) and his daughter Aisha (Sudha Bhuchar). Arjun reveals that a company card was stolen at the time by a young worker called Michael Tennant – now the local MP. When Vera tracks Michael (Martin Marquez) down, he admits to a teenage crush on Carrie. He claims it was Carrie who stole the card and he took the blame, but denies that their relationship was anything other than platonic. Is Michael’s unrequited crush a possible motive for murder? When news footage is retrieved from the miner’s protests, Carrie is spotted taking photographs in the background – it appears that she got caught up in the unrest the day she disappeared, contradicting her dad’s assertion that she went directly home. So why did Bill lie about Carrie’s whereabouts that day? Local neighbour Stan Conville (Philip Martin Brown) points Vera in the direction of Carrie’s estranged mother Beryl (Angela Bruce) who reveals that she fell out with her daughter after Carrie discovered her mother was having an affair. Could this relationship be connected to Carrie’s disappearance and murder?
06:00 ......... Bottom Knocker Street 06:35...........Dino Dan: Trek’s Adventures 07:00 ...................... Canimals 07:10 .............................Sooty 07:25.............. Share a Story 07:30.................. Scrambled! 07:35.Nerds and Monsters 07:50 .............The Aquabats! Super Show! 08:30 ...............Horrid Henry 08:50................ Hulk and the Agents of S.M.A.S.H 09:25................... The Jeremy Kyle Show 12:25....................... ITV News 12:30... Murder, She Wrote 14:30 ....Britain’s Got Talent 15:50 ..............All Star Family Fortunes 16:35...... Ninja Warriors UK 17:35.................. You’ve Been Framed! 18:05 . ITV News London 18:30.............. The Chase: Celebrity Special 19:30... Off Their Rockers W 20:00......................Vera Coi ch ce 22:00 ............... ITV News 22:15...........The Olivier W C Awards 2015 choice
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TV Guide
10th April - 16th April 2015
1 2 th 06:15 ........... How I Met Your Mother 06:40 ........... How I Met Your Mother 07:05 ..................... British GT
06:00................Children’s TV 08:25 .................... Milkshake! Bop Box 08:30 ........... Ben and Holly’s Little Kingdom
07:35 ........Everybody Loves Raymond
08:45................... Jelly Jamm
08:30 ........................... Frasier
09:30 ...... Dora and Friends
09:00........................... Frasier
10:00 .........Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
09:30.......... Sunday Brunch 12:30............George Clarke’s Amazing Spaces 13:30 ...........................The Big Bang Theory 14:25............. The Simpsons 14:55............. The Simpsons 15:55 ....Location, Location, Location 16:55 ........ Channel 4 News 17:20 ....................... Dr. Seuss’ the Lorax 19:00 .......Three in a Bed 20:00...... Britain’s Winter: Storm Heroes 21:00...Indian Summers
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22:05............. Gogglebox
23:10................. The Final Destination 00:40...... Bhuvan Shome
09:05 .....................LazyTown
A pril 06:00 ........... Totally Bonkers Guinness World Records 06:25 ...................Emmerdale Omnibus 09:05.................... Coronation Street Omnibus 11:35................ Take Me Out 12:45........................Scorpion
10:35 ........................... Access
13:45........................... Honey
10:40 .........................The Dog Rescuers
15:40........... Despicable Me
11:10 ...................... The Hotel Inspector Returns
17:35 ..................Britain’s Got Talent
12:05 ...................... The Hotel Inspector
19:00 ........... Britain’s Got More Talent
13:05 ..... Are We There Yet?
20:00................ The BackUp Plan
14:55 .................Nim’s Island 16:45 ................. Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory 18:40.................... 5 News Weekend
22:10 ............ The Bourne Identity 00:30..... Almost Married
06:10................ Walking with Beasts 07:00 ..... Who Do You Think You Are? 08:00 ....... Fake or Fortune? 09:00 .......Undercover Boss 10:00 .......Undercover Boss 11:00....... Undercover Boss 14:00................ Doctor Who 15:00................ Doctor Who 16:00 ................ Doctor Who 19:00..............Emergency Bikers 20:00... Undercover Boss 21:00 .... Motorway Cops 22:00 .........................Silk 23:20................... Grimm 00:20 ...... Deals From the Dark Side 00:45....... Deals From the Dark Side 01:15....... Toughest Place to be a...
08:55 ....Tiny House Nation
07:10 .................... Meat Men
06:00 ............. Football Gold
07:30 .................... Meat Men
06:15............. Football Gold
07:55....................... Top Gear
06:30............. Football Gold
08:55 .......................Top Gear
06:45............. Football Gold
10:00 ...... American Pickers
07:00.......... Premier League 100 Club
09:55... Selling Houses with Amanda Lamb 11:00................... Great Canal Journeys 12:05...... Food Unwrapped 12:35...... Food Unwrapped 13:40............. Jamie’s Money Saving Meals 14:10............. Jamie’s Money Saving Meals 14:40 ...............Four in a Bed 15:10............... Four in a Bed 17:20....Come Dine with Me 20:00 .....The Restoration Man 21:00................ Car S.O.S 22:00 ...............Obsessive Compulsive Cleaners 23:05 ............ 24 Hours in A and E 00:10 ................ Ramsay’s Hotel Hell
18:45 ........... Spider-Man 21:00 ......... Olympus Has Fallen 23:20 ..... Ultimate Action Movies with Vinnie Jones
Indian Summers Channel 4, 21:00 As Simla prepares for the arrival of a powerful Nawab, Madeleine is dealt some devastating news. Alice is terrified when Sarah threatens to tell everyone at the Club that Alice’s husband is still alive. Sergeant Singh discovers an incriminating note from Aafrin to Sita which he uses to blackmail Aafrin into joining their terrorist group. Aafrin is warned about the dangers of having a relationship with a British woman. The recent tensions between Ralph and Cynthia come to a head, leading to a bitter row between the pair and leaving their relationship in tatters.
06:00 ...................... The Hour of Power 07:00 ......... Are You Smarter Than a 10 Year Old? 08:00 ................................Glee 09:00 ..................The Masters Breakfast 12:00..................... WWE Raw 13:00 ............. Ashley Banjo’s Secret Street Crew 14:00 ............Harrow: A Very British School 15:00 ...........Modern Family 17:00 ..................Moone Boy 17:30 ................ About a Boy 18:00........ The Simpsons 18:30........ The Simpsons 19:00........... Wild Things 20:00............... The Flash 21:00 ........ Hawaii Five-0 22:00..NCIS: Los Angeles 00:00........ Hawaii Five-0 01:00 ............. Road Wars
11:00 ...... American Pickers 12:00...... American Pickers 13:00 ........ Storage Hunters 13:30 ........ Storage Hunters 14:00 ........ Storage Hunters 16:00 .........Motorway Cops 18:00................ Top Gear 19:00 ................Top Gear 21:00 ...................... QI XL 22:00 ..... Mock the Week 22:40...... Mock the Week 23:20............ Ross Noble
07:30............. Football Gold 07:45 ............. Football Gold 08:00.......... Premier League 100 Club 08:30............. Football Gold 08:45 ............. Football Gold 09:00 .................. The Sunday Supplement 10:30 ........................ Goals on Sunday 12:30 ....................Ford Super Sunday
00:20...................... QI XL
15:30 ....................Ford Super Sunday
01:20... Storage Hunters
19:00........... The Masters
01:50..................... Lizard Lick Towing
00:30................. Goals on Sunday
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Penguins on a Plane: Great Animal Moves 17:30, BBC2
With access to a range of animaltransport companies, zoos and aquariums, this two-part series charts the logistical challenges of moving some of the biggest, the smallest, the most dangerous and the most delicate animals across the world. In this episode a flock of gentoo penguins are flown from New Zealand to Birmingham’s National Sea Life Centre, requiring a hi-tech, custombuilt transport crate costing £40,000. With refrigeration, air filtering and even seatbelts, the penguin hotel must keep the birds in peak physical condition during their 12,500-mile journey. At the West Midlands Safari Park, two-tonne hippo Pinky must be coaxed into her transport crate before her move to the south of France to take part in a breeding programme. But on the day of the move, the extremely stubborn hippo puts the super-strong travel crate to the test.
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TV Guide
Inside Harley Street: Make Me Better
10th April - 16th April 2015
M onday
BBC2, 21.00
Acclaimed director, Vanessa Engle (Welcome To The World Of Weight Loss, Walking With Dogs) looks inside the hidden and exclusive world of private medicine, in this three-part series about Harley Street and the surrounding neighbourhood. Harley Street is a world-famous British brand, a byword for medical excellence and an exclusive and reassuringly expensive one-stop shop offering a bespoke remedy for every health problem imaginable. This series examines attitudes to health and questions what happens when the patient is a customer, and health is a consumer product which can be bought and paid for. Laced with humour and studded with historical facts, the series combines observational narratives with interviews to tell stories from both the patients’ and the doctors’ points of view. Episode one tells the story of private medicine on Harley Street, introducing the doctors as well as their patients and raising questions about the cost and value of private medical treatment. Whilst some of the patients are wealthy and pay for their own medical care, others are not. One Russian boy has come to London paid for by a telethon on Russia’s Channel One, with millions of ordinary Russians donating a few rubles each via text message to fund his treatment. A teenager flown in with his family from Kuwait has a brain tumour and is fully funded by the Kuwaiti government. Interwoven with these moving and surprising stories are tales of everyday life on Harley Street - a flower delivery service, a cycle courier delivering medical samples, as well as an interview with the director of the Howard de Walden estate, which owns almost all the property in the area and allocates leases to doctors wishing to practice here.
06:00...................... Breakfast 09:15 .............Rip Off Britain 10:00 ...... Homes Under the Hammer 11:00 ...........The Sheriffs are Coming 11:45 .............. Cowboys and Angels 12:15.............. Bargain Hunt 13:00 ...... BBC News at One 13:45 .........................Doctors 14:15 ......................The Edge 15:00 ...............Escape to the Country 15:45 ................. Home Away From Home 16:30 ...........................Flog It! 17:15 .......................Pointless 18:00.... BBC News at Six 19:00....... The One Show 19:30 ............. The Leader Interviews 20:00 ............ EastEnders 20:30 ......A Suicide in the Family 21:00.........MasterChef CW ch oi ce 22:00 ... BBC News at Ten 22:45 ......Have I Got a Bit More News for You 23:30 ........... The Graham Norton Show 00:15....... Taken in Broad Daylight
MasterChef BBC1, 21:00 Cookery competition. The MasterChef semi-finals continue with a spectacular challenge as the eight remaining cooks head to Lincolnshire to cook a celebration lunch for the Red Arrows. Split into two teams of four, for the first time the semi-finalists have to run their own kitchens in specially constructed catering tents beside the Red Arrows’s main runway. As they cook with the Red Arrows practicing their daredevil moves over their tents, will the contestants be able to rise to the challenge and produce a lunch worthy of the occasion? It’s vital the two teams perform at their absolute best because after judging their food, John and Gregg pick the weakest team to return to the MasterChef kitchen, where they must cook off against each other in a special palate test. Here they must rely on their sense of smell and palate to decipher exactly what’s in a dish cooked by John - before having to replicate the dish themselves.
06:15 ...... Homes Under the Hammer 07:15 ...........Italy Unpacked 08:15... Wanted in Paradise 09:15... Victoria Derbyshire 11:00 .....................BBC News 12:00 .......The Daily Politics 13:00.... Cagney and Lacey 13:45 ........Cash in the Attic 14:30 ............ Spring Kitchen with Tom Kerridge 15:15......... Floyd on France 15:45 ..............Are You Being Served? 16:15 .....................‘Allo, ‘Allo! 16:45 .....Just Good Friends 17:15... Antiques Roadshow 18:00............... Eggheads 18:30................. Antiques Roadshow 19:00......Collectaholics CW ch oi ce 20:00............... University Challenge 20:30......Food and Drink 21:00.......Inside Harley CW Street choice 22:00................Jack Dee’s Election Helpdesk 22:30 .............Newsnight 23:20...... Rooms, Rogues and Renters 23:50................ The Great Property Race
06:00 ............ Good Morning Britain 08:30 ........................ Lorraine 09:25 ......... The Jeremy Kyle Show 10:30 .............. This Morning 10:55...................... ITV News 11:00 .............. This Morning 12:30 ............ Loose Women 13:30 ...................... ITV News 14:00 .............. Judge Rinder 15:00 ..........Dickinson’s Real Deal 16:00.............. Tipping Point 17:00.................... The Chase 18:00.. ITV News London 18:25......... Party Election Broadcast by the Liberal Democrats 18:30......... ITV News and Weather 19:00............ Emmerdale 19:30....Coronation Street 20:00........... Wild Ireland 20:30....Coronation Street 21:00...... Code of a Killer 22:30..... ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:10 ...........The Agenda 23:55............... Slow Train Through Africa with Griff Rhys-Jones
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TV Guide
10th April - 16th April 2015
1 3 th 06:40 ............Will and Grace
06:00............. The Wotwots!
07:10 ............Will and Grace
06:10 .................Igam Ogam
07:35 ........Everybody Loves Raymond
06:20 .............. Fireman Sam
08:00 ........Everybody Loves Raymond
06:30 ................Toot the Tiny Tugboat 06:45..................... Peppa Pig
08:30 ........................... Frasier
06:50 .....................Peppa Pig
09:00 ........................... Frasier
06:55...................... Pip Ahoy!
09:25 ...............Four in a Bed
07:05 ... Milkshake Monkey
10:30 ................... Come Dine with Me
07:10 ............. Little Princess
11:00 ................... Come Dine with Me
07:35 .Thomas and Friends
11:30 ................... Come Dine with Me 12:00 ......... Channel 4 News Summary
07:20 ....The Mr. Men Show 07:50...... Noddy in Toyland 08:00 ........... Ben and Holly’s Little Kingdom 08:10 .....................Peppa Pig
12:05.................... Come Dine with Me
08:15..................... Peppa Pig
12:40................... Come Dine with Me
08:35......... Toby’s Travelling Circus
13:10..... A Place in the Sun: Home or Away
08:45.. Bananas in Pajamas
14:10................. Countdown
09:00 ...................Tickety Toc
15:00......... Deal or No Deal
09:15 ........ The Wright Stuff
16:00 ................... Come Dine with Me
11:10...................... The Hotel Inspector Returns
17:00............... Four in a Bed
12:10 ....5 News Lunchtime
17:30 ....................Coach Trip 18:00........ The Simpsons
12:15 ............Britain’s Horror Homes
18:30.............. Hollyoaks
13:15 ........Home and Away
19:00.... Channel 4 News
13:45 .................Neighbours
19:55 ........ Party Election Broadcast
14:15 ............................... NCIS
20:00........................ Food Unwrapped
17:00 ..................5 News at 5
20:30....... Travel Man: 48 Hours in Iceland
18:00 ... Home and Away
21:00...................... Skint 22:00..................... Raised by Wolves 22:30..... 8 Out of 10 Cats Does Countdown 23:35 ......The Island with Bear Grylls 00:30............... The Secret Millionaire 01:25........... Mary Portas: Secret Shopper
08:25..................... Peppa Pig
08:55.. Milkshake! Bop Box
15:15 .................Black Friday 17:30 .................Neighbours 18:30 ..... 5 News Tonight 18:55......... Party Election Broadcast on Behalf of the Liberal Democrats 19:00.... The Gadget Show 20:00.. Police Interceptors 21:00.................. Gotham 22:00.... Person of Interest 22:55....... Vantage Point 00:45.................. Jackass 01:15......... Super Casino
A pril 06:00.............. Life’s Funniest Moments 06:20 ............................. Psych 07:05 ..................Emmerdale 07:35 .....Coronation Street 08:35 ................ Dinner Date 09:35.............. Ben and Kate 10:00 ................ Up All Night 10:25 ............................. Psych 11:20.................. Royal Pains 12:15.................. Emmerdale 12:45..... Coronation Street 13:45................ Dinner Date 14:40 ......... The Jeremy Kyle Show 18:00............ You’ve Been Framed! 20:00............... Two and a Half Men 21:00 ...................... Mom 22:00 ...... Celebrity Juice 22:50 .... Almost Married 00:45 ..................Two and a Half Men
06:15 .....................Babylon 5 07:00 ...................MasterChef Australia 09:00.......................... The Bill 11:00... My Flat-Pack Home 12:00......... The Hairy Bikers’ Food Tour of Britain 13:00...............James Martin: Yorkshire’s Finest 14:00 ..............Tipping Point 15:00.. My Flat-Pack Home 16:00 ...............Escape to the Country 17:00................. Doctor Who 18:00 ............ Road Patrol Australia 19:00...Dynamo: Magician Impossible 20:00.. Supersize My Job 21:00 ..... The Call Centre 22:00 ........ The Catherine Tate Show 23:20....... Motorway Cop 00:20 ............ Road Patrol Australia
08:55.....Location, Location, Location
06:00................. The Real A&E
07:00 ................ Radical Highs
06:30................. The Real A&E
07:15 .................... Traffic Cops
07:00 ............ Dog the Bounty Hunter
08:05 ..........................Top Gear
08:00..... The Holidaymakers
10:00 ...........Storage Hunters
06:00 .........Fantasy Football Club Highlights 06:30............. Football Gold 07:00..................... WWE Raw 08:00....... Goals on Sunday 09:00 ............... Ford Football Special 10:30......... Fantasy Football Club Highlights 11:00 ............. Football Gold 12:00. Sky Sports Originals 13:00............................... FL72 14:00 ....... Goals on Sunday 15:00 .........Fantasy Football Club Highlights 15:30............... Super Rugby 16:00 ....... Goals on Sunday 17:00 ........Soccer A.M. - The Best Bits 18:00 ..........FL72 Review 19:00 ......... Ford Monday Night Football 23:00 ........Football Gold 00:00 ..........FL72 Review
09:00 ........NCIS: Los Angeles 11:00................. Hawaii Five-0 13:00........ NCIS: Los Angeles 15:00..... The Holidaymakers 16:00..........................Futurama 17:00 ............... The Simpsons 17:30 .........................Futurama 18:30.......... The Simpsons 20:00........ Modern Family 20:30..... Driving School of Mum and Dad 21:00.......... The Simpsons 21:30 ................. Futurama 22:00 ....................... Arrow 23:00 ......................Critical 00:00........... Hawaii Five-0 01:00........... Hawaii Five-0
09:00 ..........................Top Gear 11:00 ....................Trawlermen 12:00 ..........................Top Gear 14:00 ...........Storage Hunters 14:30 .................... Traffic Cops 15:30........... Storage Hunters 16:00 ....................Trawlermen 17:00 ..........................Top Gear 19:00 ..... Storage Hunters 20:00 ...............Ross Noble 21:00 ....... Mock the Week 22:20.. Would I Lie to You? 23:00 .............................. QI 00:20................ Red Dwarf 01:00...... Storage Hunters 01:30...Lizard Lick Towing 01:55........ Mock the Week
10:00.....Location, Location, Location 11:00 ..................Wake of the Red Witch 13:10 ...................Time Team 15:20 .....A Place in the Sun: Home or Away 17:25 ......................Jamie’s 15 Minute Meals 17:55....Come Dine with Me 19:00... Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares USA 19:55....... Grand Designs 21:00................. Location, Location, Location 22:00............. 24 Hours in A and E 00:05... Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares USA 01:05.............. Come Dine with Me
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Collectaholics BBC2, 19:00
Exploring the weird and wonderful world of some Britain’s passionate, avid and sometimes downright obsessive collectors. Eddie is crazy for miniature bottles of booze, but his collection has become an unruly cocktail, so Jasmine goes to visit to see if she can help organise over 3000 bottles. Mark visits 81-year-old Bryan who is dedicated to his collection of Regency to Victorian porcelain. All of his pieces come from H&R Daniel, an obscure factory in Staffordshire and he’s on a mission to collect all of the pieces with other enthusiasts. Finally Jasmine and Mark visit former punk rocker Gary, a collector with a passion for original punk promo posters from iconic bands. He started collecting in the 70s when they weren’t thought to be of value but are now considered works of art, such as highly sought after Sex Pistols posters. Mark and Jasmine are on hand to help him showcase them and find out if they were a good investment.
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TV Guide
10th April - 16th April 2015
T uesday 06:00 ...................... Breakfast 09:15 .............Rip Off Britain 10:00 ..............Homes Under the Hammer 11:00 ...........The Sheriffs are Coming 11:45.............. Cowboys and Angels
06:15 ...... Homes Under the Hammer
06:00............ Good Morning Britain
07:15........... Italy Unpacked
08:30 ........................ Lorraine
08:15 .............. Your Home in Their Hands
09:25 ...................The Jeremy Kyle Show
09:15 .......................... Victoria Derbyshire
10:30 .............. This Morning
11:00 .....................BBC News
11:00 .............. This Morning
12:15.............. Bargain Hunt
11:30........ BBC World News
13:00...................... BBC News at One
12:00........The Daily Politics
13:40 .................BBC London News 13:45 .........................Doctors 14:15 ......................The Edge 15:00 ...............Escape to the Country 15:45 ................. Home Away From Home
13:00...................... The Super League Show 13:45 ........Cash in the Attic 14:30............ Spring Kitchen with Tom Kerridge 15:15......... Floyd on France 15:40 ..............Are You Being Served? 16:10 .....................‘Allo, ‘Allo!
16:30 ...........................Flog It!
16:45 .....Just Good Friends
17:15 .......................Pointless
17:15........................ Antiques Roadshow
18:00 ............... BBC News at Six
18:00 .............. Eggheads
18:30........... BBC London News
18:30 ................ Antiques Roadshow
19:00 .......The One Show
19:00....... Collectaholics
19:30............ EastEnders
20:00 .....Back in Time for Dinner
20:00 ............. Holby City 21:00......Ordinary Lies
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22:00............... BBC News at Ten 22:30 ........... BBC London News 22:45.............. Millionaire Basement Wars
21:00...............Britain’s W C Favourite Foods - choice Are They Good for You? 22:00.....Later Live... with Jools Holland
23:35..............Moonlight Mile Drama set in the 1970s, in which love and death collide as a young man’s fiancee dies suddenly, and he is left to grieve with her parents while falling in love with another woman. Against his better judgement, he finds himself falling into a new relationship with the girlfriend of a solider missing in Vietnam, while being drawn into a legal battle as the district attorney seeks justice for the family.
01:25 ................. Weather for the Week Ahead 01:30............... BBC News
22:30..............Newsnight 23:20.......... Inside Harley Street 00:20................. Antiques Roadshow 01:20...... The Ladykillers: Pest Detectives
10:55....................... ITV News 12:30............ Loose Women 13:30.............. ITV News and Weather 14:00 .............. Judge Rinder 15:00 ................... Dickinson’s Real Deal 16:00...............Tipping Point 17:00 ....................The Chase 18:00................ ITV News London 18:25 ........ Party Election Broadcast by the UK Independence Party 18:30......... ITV News and Weather 19:00............ Emmerdale 19:00.......................UEFA Champions League Live Atletico Madrid v Real Madrid Mark Pougatch introduces live coverage of the UEFA Champions League quarter-finals on ITV. Starting with Real Madrid’s visit to city rivals Atletico ITV will show two matches from the quarter-finals of Europe’s premier club competition featuring four of the teams hotly tipped to win it. Diego Simeone’s Atletico trail Carlo Ancelotti’s side in La Liga, but go into this match - a repeat of last year’s final - having recorded a 4-0 win over their neighbours at the Estadio Vicente Calderon in February and a series of free-scoring victories in the group stage. Real, the 2014 winners, have come under fire after losing ground to league leaders Barcelona and a perceived dip in form of record signing Gareth Bale, yet were unbeaten in the group stage with home and away victories over Liverpool.
22:00 ..... ITV News at Ten and Weather 22:40....UEFA Champions League: Extra Time 23:40............... Benidorm 00:10............ Jackpot247
uesday
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TV Guide
10th April - 16th April 2015
1 4 th
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06:00 .................Countdown
06:00................Children’s TV
06:45............ Will and Grace
06:55 ......................Pip Ahoy!
07:10 ............Will and Grace
07:05... Milkshake Monkey
07:35 ........Everybody Loves Raymond
07:10 ............. Little Princess
08:00 ........Everybody Loves Raymond
07:35................. Thomas and Friends
08:30 ........................... Frasier
07:50 ......Noddy in Toyland
09:00........................... Frasier
08:00 ........... Ben and Holly’s Little Kingdom
09:25 ...............Four in a Bed 10:30 ................... Come Dine with Me 11:00................... Come Dine with Me 11:30 ................... Come Dine with Me 12:00.......... Channel 4 News Summary 12:05.................... Come Dine with Me 12:35.................... Come Dine with Me 13:05......A Place in the Sun: Home or Away 14:10..................Countdown 15:00......... Deal or No Deal 16:00 ................... Come Dine with Me 17:00 ...............Four in a Bed 17:30.................... Coach Trip 18:00........ The Simpsons 18:30.............. Hollyoaks 19:00.... Channel 4 News 19:55 ........ Party Election Broadcast 20:00.......... Burger Bar to Gourmet Star
06:00 ..............Life’s Funniest Moments 06:20 ............................. Psych 07:05.................. Emmerdale 07:35......Coronation Street 08:35................ Dinner Date 09:35 .............. Ben and Kate 10:00 ................ Up All Night 10:25............................. Psych 11:20.................. Royal Pains 12:15.................. Emmerdale 12:45 .....Coronation Street 13:45 ................ Dinner Date 14:40 ...................The Jeremy Kyle Show 18:00............ You’ve Been Framed! 20:00 ...... Educating Joey Essex 21:00 ........ Hell’s Kitchen 22:00.......... Keith Lemon: The Film 23:50................Two and a Half Men
06:00 .....................Babylon 5 06:45 ................ Doctor Who 07:40 ...................MasterChef Australia 09:05.......................... The Bill 11:00... My Flat-Pack Home 12:00.......... The Hairy Bikers’ Food Tour of Britain 13:00.............. James Martin: Yorkshire’s Finest 14:00 ..............Tipping Point 15:00... My Flat-Pack Home 16:00 ...............Escape to the Country 17:00................. Doctor Who 18:00............. Road Patrol Australia 19:00 ................ Dynamo: Magician Impossible 20:00... Undercover Boss 21:00...........World’s Most Talented 22:00.................... Grimm 23:00............ Traffic Cops
08:55 ....Location, Location, Location
06:00 .............. The Real A&E
07:00 ..............Radical Highs
06:30 .............. The Real A&E
07:15 ................. Traffic Cops
17:30 .................Neighbours
07:00 ..........Dog the Bounty Hunter
08:05 .......................Top Gear
18:00.... Home and Away
08:00... The Holidaymakers
18:30..... 5 News Tonight
09:00...... NCIS: Los Angeles
11:00 .................Trawlermen
18:55........ Party Election Broadcast on Behalf of the Uk Independence Party
11:00 ..............Hawaii Five-0
19:00.. Police Interceptors
16:00 ..................... Futurama
06:00 ............. Football Gold 08:00 ...........................Cricket 08:30 ............. Football Gold 09:15........ Soccer A.M. - The Best Bits 10:15............. Football Gold 10:30........................... Cricket 11:00............ Indian Premier League 19:30 ........Football Gold 19:40............. Champions League Quarter Final 1st Leg 21:40................ Football’s Greatest 22:10...... Premier League 100 Club 22:40.... Barclays Premier League Legends 23:10.........Football Gold 00:00................ Football’s Greatest 00:30................ Football’s Greatest Teams 01:00................ Football’s Greatest Managers 01:30...... Premier League 100 Club
07:20.... The Mr. Men Show
08:10 .....................Peppa Pig 08:35 .........Toby’s Travelling Circus 08:45 ....................Bananas in Pajamas 08:55 .................... Milkshake! Bop Box 09:00................... Tickety Toc 09:15 ........ The Wright Stuff 11:10 ...................... The Hotel Inspector Returns 12:10 ....5 News Lunchtime 12:15............ The Nightmare Neighbour Next Door
14:15............................... NCIS 15:15 .............Her Fatal Flaw 17:00 ..................5 News at 5
22:00.....My Big Fat Asian Wedding
21:00...... Can’t Pay? Final Demand Special
23:00.......The Island with Bear Grylls
22:00....2,000 Tattoos, 40 Piercings and a Pickled Ear
13:00 ............................... NCIS: Los Angeles 15:00 .. The Holidaymakers 17:00 .............The Simpsons 17:30 ..................... Futurama 18:00............... Futurama
10:00 ........ Storage Hunters 12:00 .......................Top Gear 14:00 ........ Storage Hunters 14:30 ................. Traffic Cops 15:30 ........ Storage Hunters 16:00 .................Trawlermen 16:30 .................Trawlermen 17:00....................... Top Gear 19:00 ... Storage Hunters
18:30 ....... The Simpsons
20:00...................... QI XL
20:00 ................ A League of Their Own
22:00............ Ross Noble 23:00 ........................... QI
23:00...........200 Nips and Tucks and I Want More!
21:00 ...................Critical
23:40............................ QI
22:00 .................. Forever
00:20 ............. Red Dwarf
00:00....... The Nightmare Neighbour Next Door
23:00 ........ Hawaii Five-0
01:00 ... Storage Hunters
01:25.... Mobil 1 The Grid
00:00 ........ Hawaii Five-0
01:50............... British GT
01:00..........Super Casino
01:00 ........ Hawaii Five-0
01:30 ..............Lizard Lick Towing
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13:10 ...................Time Team 15:20..... A Place in the Sun: Home or Away 17:25 ......................Jamie’s 15 Minute Meals 17:55.................... Come Dine with Me 19:00... Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares USA 19:55 ...... Grand Designs 21:00 ...........Building the Dream 22:00 ........ Embarrassing Bodies 23:05...24 Hours in A and E 00:10... Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares USA
13:45 .................Neighbours
20:00.......Britain’s Horror Homes
00:55...........KOTV Boxing Weekly
11:20 ...........The Gentle Sex
13:15 ........Home and Away
21:00...... One Born Every CW Minute ch oi ce
00:00...... Pokerstars.Com European Poker Tour
11:10............ Hugh’s 3 Good Things
Ordinary Lies BBC1, 21.00
The penultimate episode of the six-part series tells the story of enigmatic salesman, Pete. Renowned as the office hypochondriac, Pete is never without his inhaler and pain killers, but it soon becomes clear that his ailments are the least of his worries. Having suffered a number of tragic miscarriages over the years, when Pete and his wife Vannessa find out that they are expecting a baby it seems like luck is finally on their side. However, as a recovering gambling addict with crippling debts, Pete is already feeling the pressure financially. When he and colleague Fat Jason are involved in a violent car robbery during a test drive, things soon spiral out of control. Brutally beaten and bloody, the men end up in hospital where they are questioned by the police. With the police convinced the robbery was an inside job, attention quickly turns to Fat Jason whose increasingly suspicious behaviour is causing concern. Meanwhile, Beth and Mike take the next step in their relationship as Beth tries to move on with her life. However, continuing to receive the silent phone calls, Beth is feeling pressure from Dave’s mother to not give up on her husband.
Britain’s Favourite Foods - Are They Good for You? BBC2, 21:00
Professor Alice Roberts discovers which are Britain’s most popular fresh foods - and uses the latest science to uncover the surprising health benefits of our favourite foods. Last year in Britain we spent over 84 billion pounds on food. With each beep of the till, every item of food we buy is recorded and scrutinised. It produces an extraordinary shopping list - what we’re buying most of and spending the most money on. From three billion litres of milk a year to 730 million kilos of bananas; from 520 million kilos of chicken to 1.34 billion kilos of potatoes - the BBC has gained access to the latest information about the fresh foods we load into our supermarket trolleys. But what do we actually know about these favourite foods? How good are they for us, and are we getting the best from them could they actually make us feel and look better?
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TV Guide
10th April - 16th April 2015
W ednesday 06:00 ...................... Breakfast 09:15............. Rip Off Britain 10:00 ...... Homes Under the Hammer 11:00 ...........The Sheriffs are Coming 11:45 .............. Cowboys and Angels 12:15.............. Bargain Hunt 13:00...... BBC News at One 13:40 ....BBC London News 13:45......................... Doctors 14:15 ......................The Edge 15:00 ...............Escape to the Country 15:45 ................. Home Away From Home 16:30............................Flog It! 17:15 .......................Pointless 18:00 .... BBC News at Six 19:00 .......The One Show 19:30 ............. The Leader Interviews 20:00 ........... MasterChef 21:00 ........Secret Britain 22:00 ... BBC News at Ten 22:30 .BBC London News 22:45 .........A Question of Sport 23:15 ..............Wild Hogs 00:50 ..... Weather for the Week Ahead
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06:15 ...... Homes Under the Hammer 07:15 ...........Italy Unpacked 08:15 .........An Island Parish 08:45 ......Helicopter Heroes Down Under 09:15 .. Victoria Derbyshire 11:00 .....................BBC News 11:30 ........BBC World News 12:00 .......The Daily Politics 13:00 .... Cagney and Lacey 13:45 ........Cash in the Attic 14:30 ............ Spring Kitchen with Tom Kerridge 15:15 .........Floyd on France 15:45 ..............Are You Being Served? 16:15 .....................‘Allo, ‘Allo! 16:45 .....Just Good Friends 17:15 ........................Antiques Roadshow 18:00.............. Eggheads 18:30................. Antiques Roadshow 19:00 ....... Collectaholics 20:00 ..... The Ladykillers: Pest Detectives 21:00..................Kill the CW Christians choice 22:00............................ QI 22:30 .............Newsnight 23:20 ... Britain’s Favourite Foods - Are They Good for You? 00:20... The Billion Dollar Chicken Shop
06:00 ............ Good Morning Britain 08:30......................... Lorraine 09:25.......... The Jeremy Kyle Show 10:30.............. This Morning 10:55...................... ITV News 11:00............... This Morning 12:30............ Loose Women 13:30 ...................... ITV News 14:00.............. Judge Rinder 15:00.......... Dickinson’s Real Deal 16:00 ..............Tipping Point 17:00.................... The Chase 18:00.. ITV News London 18:25........ Party Election Broadcast by the Conservative Party 18:30......... ITV News and Weather 19:00 ........... Emmerdale 19:30 .Coronation Street 20:00 .Give a Pet a Home 21:00............... Newzoids 21:30.. The Delivery Man 22:00 ..... ITV News at Ten and Weather 22:40 ...............Raining in My Heart 23:40....... Corfu: A Tale of Two Islands
This World: Kill The Christians BBC2, 21.00
Christianity is facing the greatest threat to its existence in the very place where it was born. Jane Corbin travels across the Middle East to some of the holiest places in Christendom and finds that hundreds of thousands of Christians are fleeing Islamic extremists, conflict and persecution. From the Nineveh plains in Iraq to the ancient city of Maaloula in Syria, Kill The Christians reveals the story of how the religion that shaped Western culture and history is in danger of disappearing in large parts of its ancient heartland.
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TV Guide
10th April - 16th April 2015
ednesday
1 5 th
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06:00 .................Countdown 06:45 ............Will and Grace 07:10 ............Will and Grace 07:35 ........Everybody Loves Raymond 08:00 ........Everybody Loves Raymond 08:30 ........................... Frasier 09:00 ........................... Frasier 09:25 ...............Four in a Bed 10:30................... Come Dine with Me 11:00 ................... Come Dine with Me 11:30................... Come Dine with Me 12:00......... Channel 4 News Summary 12:05................... Come Dine with Me 12:35................... Come Dine with Me 13:05...................... A Place in the Sun: Home or Away 14:10................. Countdown 15:00 ......... Deal or No Deal 16:00 ................... Come Dine with Me 17:00 ...............Four in a Bed 17:30 ....................Coach Trip 18:00 ....... The Simpsons 18:30 .............. Hollyoaks 19:00 ..................Channel 4 News 19:55......... Party Election Broadcast 20:00 ........ Million Pound Properties 21:00...... The Island with Bear Grylls 22:00...........First Dates
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23:00 ..... One Born Every Minute 00:05 .......Snowbombing 2015 01:00...................... Cyrus
06:00 ............. The Wotwots! 06:10 .................. gam Ogam 06:20 .............. Fireman Sam 06:30 ................Toot the Tiny Tugboat 06:45 .....................Peppa Pig 06:50 .....................Peppa Pig 06:55 ......................Pip Ahoy! 07:05 ... Milkshake Monkey 07:10 ............. Little Princess 07:20 ....The Mr. Men Show 07:35................. Thomas and Friends 07:50 ......Noddy in Toyland 08:00 ........... Ben and Holly’s Little Kingdom 08:10 .....................Peppa Pig 08:35 .........Toby’s Travelling Circus 08:45 ....................Bananas in Pajamas 08:55 .. Milkshake! Bop Box 09:00................... Tickety Toc 09:15 ........ The Wright Stuff 11:10 .The Hotel Inspector 12:10... 5 News Lunchtime 12:15 ... Police Interceptors 13:15 ........Home and Away 13:45 .................Neighbours 14:15 ... NCIS: New Orleans 15:15 .......................Betrayed 17:00 ..................5 News at 5 17:30 .................Neighbours 18:00.... Home and Away 18:30..... 5 News Tonight 18:55 ........ Party Election Broadcast on Behalf of the Conservative Party 19:00.. Police Interceptors 20:00....... The Nightmare Neighbour Next Door 21:00... Celeb CSI NY: Kim Kardashian 22:00................ Celeb CSI: Taylor Swift 22:55.......Celeb CSI: Ozzy Osbourne 23:50... Celeb CSI: Sharon Osbourne 00:45.....True Crimes: The First 72 Hours
06:00 ..............Life’s Funniest Moments 06:20 ............................. Psych 07:05 ..................Emmerdale 07:35.................. You’ve Been Framed! 08:35 ................ Dinner Date 09:35 .............. Ben and Kate 10:00................ Up All Night 10:25 ............................. Psych 11:20 .................. Royal Pains 12:10...................Emmerdale 12:40.................. Britain’s Got More Talent 13:45................ Dinner Date 14:40....................The Jeremy Kyle Show 18:00............ You’ve Been Framed! 20:00............... Two and a Half Men 21:00 .......... The Vampire Diaries 22:00 ...........Red Dragon 00:30 ...............Two and a Half Men
06:15 .....................Babylon 5 07:00 ................ Doctor Who 08:00 ...................MasterChef Australia 09:00.......................... The Bill 11:00 .. My Flat-Pack Home 12:00 ......... The Hairy Bikers’ Food Tour of Britain 13:00 ..............James Martin: Yorkshire’s Finest 14:00................Real Rescues 15:00.. My Flat-Pack Home 16:00 ...............Escape to the Country 17:00 ................ Doctor Who 18:00............ Road Patrol Australia 19:00................. Dynamo: Magician Impossible 20:00 ......... Resurrection 21:00................... Grimm 22:00 ................ Dynamo: Magician Impossible 23:00 ........... Traffic Cops
08:55.... Location, Location, Location
06:00 .............. The Real A&E
07:00 ................ Radical Highs 07:15 .................... Traffic Cops 08:05 ..........................Top Gear 10:00 ...........Storage Hunters 11:00.................... Trawlermen 12:00 ..........................Top Gear 14:00........... Storage Hunters 14:30..................... Traffic Cops 15:30........... Storage Hunters 16:00 ....................Trawlermen 17:00 ..........................Top Gear 19:00...... Storage Hunters 20:00.... American Pickers 21:00......................... QI XL 22:00 .Would I Lie to You? 22:40 ..........Alan Davies as Yet Untitled 23:40 .............................. QI 00:20 ................Red Dwarf 01:00 ..... Storage Hunters 01:30...Lizard Lick Towing 01:55.. Would I Lie to You?
06:00 ............. Football Gold 07:00 .......WWE Experience 08:00 ...........................Cricket 08:30.............. Football Gold 09:00 .........Fantasy Football Club Highlights 09:30.......... Premier League 100 Club 10:00......... Barclays Premier League Legends 10:30 ...........................Cricket 11:00......... Barclays Premier League Legends 11:30.............. Football Gold 12:30........... Premier League 100 Club 13:30...... Sporting Rivalries 14:00........... Premier League 100 Club 14:30..........Barclays Premier League Legends 15:00............. Indian Premier League 19:30.........Football Gold 19:40............. Champions League Quarter Final 1st Leg
06:30 .............. The Real A&E 07:00.......... Fast and Furious Special 07:30...........Dog the Bounty Hunter 08:00... The Holidaymakers 09:00...... NCIS: Los Angeles 10:00...... NCIS: Los Angeles 11:00.............. Hawaii Five-0 14:00...... NCIS: Los Angeles 15:00 .. The Holidaymakers 16:00 ..................... Futurama 17:00 .............The Simpsons 17:30 ..................... Futurama 18:00 .............. Futurama 18:30 ....... The Simpsons 20:00 ........... Wild Things 21:00 ...................Con Air 23:15 ..................... Stella 00:15....NCIS: Los Angeles 01:15........ Hawaii Five-0
11:05 ............... Shenandoah 13:10 ...................Time Team 15:20 .....A Place in the Sun: Home or Away 17:25.......................Jamie’s 15 Minute Meals 17:55 ................... Come Dine with Me 19:00... Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares USA 19:55...... Grand Designs 21:00............. Tiny House Nation 22:00..... 8 Out of 10 Cats Does Countdown 23:00 ............ 24 Hours in A and E 00:05... Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares USA 01:05.............. Come Dine with Me
First Dates Channel 4, 22:00
There’s a second chance for two daters this week. Mula, 23, who was stood up on her last visit to the restaurant, is hoping round two will be better. Her blind date is fellow returner, funny man AJ, who compares girls to a bucket of KFC. Mula wants someone who can make her laugh, so AJ tries to seduce her with his best jokes. Could it be second time lucky? Geordie postwoman Jodie is back after being ‘friend zoned’ last week. Describing her dream woman as ‘a cross between Katie Perry and Cheryl Cole’, Jodie is pleasantly surprised by Irish beauty Louise. But her aim to ‘talk less’ quickly goes out the window as the nerves kick in, threatening to undo her once again. Tom is a suave, confident restaurant owner looking for a refined lady.
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TV Guide
The Agenda ITV1, 22.40
Starting with a live episode the same evening as the leaders’ debate on ITV, the series features ITV News Political Editor Tom Bradby being joined by four guests to discuss the big issues of the week in front of a studio audience at The Hospital Club in central London. Guests during the series will include Prime Minister David Cameron, Labour leader Ed Miliband and Liberal Democrat Leader Nick Clegg as well as the biggest names from the world of entertainment, arts, culture and journalism. Tom and his guests discuss the talking points of the coming week – from the run-up to the Election to the major cultural events of the week. Guests in previous series include David Cameron – marking the first time that a serving British Prime Minister has appeared on a panel show – Nick Clegg, Ed Miliband, George Osborne, Harriet Harman, Nigel Farage, Boris Johnson, Hugh Grant, Bettany Hughes, Michelle Mone, David Baddiel, Sir Patrick Stewart, Andrea Riseborough, Clive Anderson Mariella Frostrup and Michael Morpurgo.
Double Decker Driving School ITV1, 20.30 This time, newly-married Rodney Willis is preparing for his test. Despite having driven hundreds of cars in his previous job as a car salesman, nothing can prepare Rodney for taking control of a ten-tonne double decker - particularly when he finds himself surrounded with hundreds of marching protesters in the middle of Trafalgar Square. Now he’s ready for his test, but forgetting to indicate at a roundabout sees Rodney lose his cool. A face to face meeting with training manager Geoff White results in Rodney being told to buck up his ideas, or face being thrown off the course. Geoff says: “Anytime you forget when you’re driving in service, you’re probably talking about killing somebody, you can’t afford to forget can you? No. You need to get over it, grow a pair, move on.” Former traffic warden Alvin de Guzman is a father of
10th April - 16th April 2015
T hursday 06:00 ...................... Breakfast 09:15 .............Rip Off Britain 10:00...... Homes Under the Hammer 11:00 ...........The Sheriffs are Coming
06:15...... Homes Under the Hammer
06:00 ............ Good Morning Britain
07:15........... Italy Unpacked
08:30........................ Lorraine
08:15 .................Great British Garden Revival
09:25 ......... The Jeremy Kyle Show
09:15 .. Victoria Derbyshire
10:30 .............. This Morning
11:45 .............. Cowboys and Angels
11:00 .....................BBC News
10:55 ...................... ITV News
12:15 .............. Bargain Hunt
11:30 ........BBC World News
11:00.............. This Morning
12:00 .......The Daily Politics
12:30............ Loose Women
13:00 .... Cagney and Lacey
13:30...................... ITV News
13:45 ........Cash in the Attic
14:00.............. Judge Rinder
14:30 ............ Spring Kitchen with Tom Kerridge
15:00 ................... Dickinson’s Real Deal
15:15 .........Floyd on France
16:00.............. Tipping Point
15:45 ..............Are You Being Served?
17:00 ....................The Chase
16:15..................... ‘Allo, ‘Allo!
18:25 ........ Party Election Broadcast by the Labour Party
13:00 ...... BBC News at One 13:40.... BBC London News 13:45 .........................Doctors 14:15 ......................The Edge 15:00 ...............Escape to the Country 15:45................. Home Away From Home 16:30 ...........................Flog It! 17:15 .......................Pointless 18:00.... BBC News at Six 18:30 ........... BBC London News 19:00 .......The One Show 19:30............ EastEnders 20:00.......... BBC Election Debate 2015 22:00 ... BBC News at Ten 22:30 .BBC London News 22:45 ...... Question Time 23:45 ..............This Week
16:45..... Just Good Friends 17:15... Antiques Roadshow
18:00.. ITV News London
18:00............... Eggheads
18:30................ ITV News
18:30 ................ Antiques Roadshow
19:00............ Emmerdale 19:30...................Tonight
19:00........ Collectaholics
20:00 ........... Emmerdale
20:00 ..... Coast Australia
20:30 ...Double Decker Driving School
20:50 .. Nature’s Weirdest Events 21:00............... Banished 22:00 ............ Inside No 9 22:30 .............Newsnight 23:20.....Kill the Christians
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21:00 ............. Ice Rink on the Estate 22:00..... ITV News at Ten 22:40.........The Agenda
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23:25 .............. Newzoids
three who faces a battle to get to grips with the English language as well as the double-decker buses he is learning to drive. After several near misses with cars and lorries on London’s roads, Alvin needs to dramatically improve and show his instructors on his regular progress checks that he has the ability to understand what’s needed of him. He says: “Of course I am worried about it because they will check the way I drive now again, I hope I will make progress. I have a 15-year-old daughter, I have a 13-year-old son, and I have a one-year-old daughter. I don’t want to let them down.” Meanwhile, Courtney de Santos is brimming with confidence having turned to bus driving after helming a white van. He says: “I’d say I mastered driving one of them [a van], it was a piece of cake, so I was like, ‘Let me try something bigger.’ When I try and do things, I do things to the best of my ability, when you go into something you might as well be the best.” But his new instructor Shabaz Alam believes the young trainee is too cocky and isn’t learning from his mistakes, so sets out to put Courtney through his paces. “I’m a hard man to please. If you make seven or eight mistakes they could all lead to something serious happening.”
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TV Guide
10th April - 16th April 2015
hursday
1 6 th
06:00 .................Countdown 06:45 ............Will and Grace 07:10 ............Will and Grace 07:35 ........Everybody Loves Raymond 08:00 ........Everybody Loves Raymond 08:25 ........................... Frasier 09:00 ........................... Frasier 09:25 ...............Four in a Bed 10:30................... Come Dine with Me 11:00 ................... Come Dine with Me 11:30 ................... Come Dine with Me 12:00 ......... Channel 4 News Summary 12:05 ................... Come Dine with Me 12:35 ................... Come Dine with Me 13:05 .....A Place in the Sun: Home or Away 14:10 .................Countdown 15:00......... Deal or No Deal 16:00 ................... Come Dine with Me 17:00 ...............Four in a Bed 17:30 ....................Coach Trip 18:00 ....... The Simpsons 18:30.............. Hollyoaks 19:00 .... Channel 4 News 19:55 ........ Party Election Broadcast 20:00 ........ The Supervet
21:00...... The Island with Bear Grylls 22:00........The Secret Life of the Pub 23:00....................... Skint
06:00 ............. The Wotwots! 06:10................. Igam Ogam 06:20.............. Fireman Sam 06:30 ................Toot the Tiny Tugboat 06:45 .....................Peppa Pig 06:50 .....................Peppa Pig 06:55 ......................Pip Ahoy! 07:05 ... Milkshake Monkey 07:10 ............. Little Princess 07:20.....The Mr. Men Show 07:35 .................Thomas and Friends 07:50 ......Noddy in Toyland 08:00 ........... Ben and Holly’s Little Kingdom 08:15..................... Peppa Pig 08:25..................... Peppa Pig 08:35 .........Toby’s Travelling Circus 08:45 ....................Bananas in Pajamas 09:00 ...................Tickety Toc 09:15........ The Wright Stuff 11:10...................... The Hotel Inspector Returns 12:10 ........................... 5 News Lunchtime 12:15 .......... Secrets of Great British Castles 13:15 ........Home and Away 13:45 .................Neighbours 14:15............................... NCIS 15:15.................. Look Again 17:00 ..................5 News at 5 17:30 .................Neighbours 18:00 ... Home and Away 18:30 ..... 5 News Tonight 18:55 ........ Party Election Broadcast on Behalf of the Labour Party 19:00 ............. The Classic Car Show 20:00 ..................The Last Days of... 21:00 ............... The Hotel Inspector 22:00 ........The Mentalist 22:55 .......... Born to Kill? 23:55.....................Access
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06:00 ..............Life’s Funniest Moments 06:20 ............................. Psych 07:05...................Emmerdale 07:35 .....Coronation Street 08:10 ................. You’ve Been Framed! 08:35 ................ Dinner Date 09:35 .............. Ben and Kate 10:00 ................ Up All Night 10:25............................. Psych 11:20 .................. Royal Pains 12:15 ..................Emmerdale 12:45..... Coronation Street 13:15 ................. You’ve Been Framed! 13:45................ Dinner Date 14:40................... The Jeremy Kyle Show 18:00 ........... You’ve Been Framed! 20:00............... Two and a Half Men 21:00 ................Scorpion 22:00....... Celebrity Juice
06:15 .....................Babylon 5 07:00 ................ Doctor Who 08:00 ...................MasterChef Australia 09:00 .......................... The Bill 11:00 .. My Flat-Pack Home 12:00 ......... The Hairy Bikers’ Food Tour of Britain 13:00 ..............James Martin: Yorkshire’s Finest 14:00................Real Rescues 15:00... My Flat-Pack Home 16:00................Escape to the Country 17:00................ Doctor Who 18:00............ Road Patrol Australia 19:00................. Dynamo: Magician Impossible 20:00 ................... Grimm 21:00......... Resurrection 22:00 ..... One Born Every Minute 23:00............ Traffic Cops
08:55 ....Location, Location, Location
06:00............... The Real A&E 06:30 .............. The Real A&E 07:00 ......Sun, Sea and A&E 08:00 .. The Holidaymakers 09:00 ..... NCIS: Los Angeles 10:00...............Hawaii Five-0 11:00 ..............Hawaii Five-0 12:00 ..............Hawaii Five-0 13:00 ..... NCIS: Los Angeles 15:00 ................The Fanatics 16:00 ..................... Futurama 16:30 ..................... Futurama 17:00 .............The Simpsons 17:30 ..................... Futurama 18:00 .............. Futurama 18:30 ....... The Simpsons 19:00 ....... The Simpsons 20:00 .....................Arrow 21:00 .................. Forever 22:00 ........... Wild Things 23:00 ................ NCIS: Los Angeles
07:00 ..............Radical Highs 07:15.................. Traffic Cops 08:05 .......................Top Gear 09:00 .......................Top Gear 10:00........ Storage Hunters 10:30 ........ Storage Hunters 11:00................. Trawlermen 12:00 .......................Top Gear 13:00 .......................Top Gear 14:00 ........ Storage Hunters 14:30 ................. Traffic Cops 15:30 ........ Storage Hunters 16:00 .................Trawlermen 16:30 .................Trawlermen 17:00 .......................Top Gear 18:00................ Top Gear 19:00.... Storage Hunters 21:00.... Russell Howard’s Good News Extra 22:00....................... Suits 23:00 ........................... QI 23:40 ........................... QI
06:00 .........Fantasy Football Club Highlights 06:30 ............. Football Gold 08:00 ...........................Cricket 08:30 .........Fantasy Football Club Highlights 09:00 ................Soccer A.M. The Best Bits 10:00..........Barclays Premier League Legends 10:30 ...........................Cricket 11:00 ............. Football Gold 11:30.......... Premier League 100 Club 12:00 ...........................Cricket 12:30 .........Fantasy Football Club Highlights 13:00 .............FL72 Midweek Review 14:00........... Premier League 100 Club 14:30..........Barclays Premier League Legends 15:00 ............. Football Gold 16:00 .................. Boots ‘n’ All 17:00 .........Fantasy Football Club Highlights
10:00 ....Location, Location, Location 11:05 ............ Hugh’s 3 Good Things 11:15 ......... Doctor at Large 13:10 ...................Time Team 15:20 ...................... A Place in the Sun: Home or Away 17:25...................... Jamie’s 15 Minute Meals 17:55................... Come Dine with Me 19:00... Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares USA 19:55....... Grand Designs 21:00....... The Good Wife 22:00 ...........The Hoarder Next Door 23:05............. 24 Hours in A and E
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The Secret Life of the Pub Channel 4, 22:00
The average British man spends a year and a half of his life in a pub. For many, it’s a place of sanctuary, somewhere to unwind and just be themselves, or, to quote one boisterous patron: ‘Women go to pubs to talk about their problems. Men go to pubs to get away from them.’ The Lord Nelson, a traditional boozer in London’s East End, has been rigged with cameras to see what men really say when women are not around and they’re not on their best behaviour. Expect plenty of witty banter, a little argy-bargy and an end-ofnight drunken sing-along. This fresh, funny and engaging documentary meets a diverse mixture of men. Cudge and Dodds have been best mates for 35 years. In their twenties they were as thick as thieves.
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What’s On in Tenerife
10th April - 16th April 2015
Sunday shopping in Santa Cruz A special Sunday day of shopping comes to When: Santa Cruz! There is an extensive programme April 12th of activities as well with various sporting events, youth activities, music shows and special kidWhere: die play areas along with a gastronomic route! Santa Cruz The event will run from 11am-8pm in the triangle between the Rambla, San Sebastian Street and the sea. There will be trade, food, fashion, music, arts, crafts, sports, tourism and leisure sectors showcasing through numerous activities for all ages all day long.
Circolandia
It’s back! Circolandia makes a long awaited return to Los Cristianos for one show only on Sunday. Over 20 artists from a plethora of countries will wow the crowd with all the traditional circus antics! When: April 12th, 6pm Where: The Infanta Leonorauditorium Los Cristianos. Tickets: Los Cristianos cultural centre at 10 euros or 12 euros on the night at the door.
Dorada Brewery Tour
Mueca Street Art Festival
The local beer company opens its doors to unveil the manufacturing process of Dorada beer, from the collection of raw materials to bottling. It’s a guided tour through the facilities explaining each stage of the brewing process. And at the end of the visit you will be invited to a Dorada or two in the Tasting Room. Booking is highly recommended.
When: Every Tuesday Where: Avenida de Ángel Romero in Santa Cruz More info: doradatour.es
One of the highlights in the spring is the art festival which takes place in Puerto de la Cruz from 7-10th May. This year the star attraction will be a Cirque du Soleil type show called Ilotopie at the Martiánez sea bathing lake on 7 and 8 May (Thursday and Friday). Tickets cost just 8 euros.
When: 7th-10th May Where: Puerto del la Cruz More details: www.entrees.es
Tegueste Tour Enjoy the scenery and explore the history of the town of Tegueste through over thirty thematic routes that take place throughout the year. Specialised guides will show you the most beautiful scenery of the town, its historical, artistic and archaeological heritage and, of course, vineyards and everything related to its great wine tradition. There are hiking trails, dramatised routes that will transport you to the past or night routes for a unique experience under the moon.
When: Every Day More Info www.tegueste.org
Tenerife Symphony Orchestra VIOLIN concertos and the symphonic works of Mahler are among the highlights of the 2015 season of the Tenerife Symphony Orchestra, under the leadership of Polish maestro Nesterowicz Michal.
When: Until 26th June Where: Auditorio de Tenerife in Santa Cruz More details: www.ost.es
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Entertainment
10th April - 16th April 2015
37 CW
It’s a grand Slam!
By Jamie Droo TENERIFE has always been home to some very talented people. But sometimes, the word “talent” is misplaced, overused or simply used to describe somebody’s personal opinion of another.
But what defines talent? In a nutshell, talent is simply a person’s ability to do something well. It comes naturally in its best form, and is nurtured with an individual’s passion for the subject with which his/ her talent sits. When it falls within the field of entertainment, and is managed well, that individual usually excels. However, the noun can be used to define more than one individual collectively, as talented. This is an accolade much harder to achieve but when it is, something magical happens on stage. Over the years here, I have seen many talented people have a go at working together. As individuals they excel - but when they team up, that magic can be lost. To be able to work alongside another artiste on stage and produce something as one takes a different kind of talent. To blend vocally blend is not always down to their ability to do something well. It is, however,
down to whether the tone in their voices is compatible. Then there is personality. In most cases, especially duos, there is always a stronger personality on the stage. This formula works well and is more prominent in the comedy field. But in a singing duo, these two dynamics have to blend. Finally, the content with which performers choose to use to entertain is all-important to demonstrate their talent. This week, I have the pleasure of writing about two people for whom I’ve held huge respect as solo singers since my arrival here 15 years ago. So when the announcement came that Robbie Dominic, well-known for his Eighties Gold Show and The Bigger Breakfast Show on Oasis Fm, and Suzie Q, who has achieved success on Tenerife stages with
her Carpenters’ Show, Abba Tribute and as a solo singer, were getting together, I knew straight away that this would be something special. Even more so when I realised that this was not a brand-new collaboration but a reunion of a show they performed together almost 30 years ago. Slam, as they were collectively known, worked the UK circuit in such venues as working men’s clubs, social clubs and holiday parks. They performed a wide range of music to cover the required time slots, which were usually broken down into either 3 x 30 mins or 2 x 45 mins spots. Both Robbie and Suzie possess all and more of the dynamics I have mentioned to define talent. Slam decided to re-locate to Tenerife and de-
velop a show for the holiday circuit here - a circuit so different from the one they were leaving. They had a good Tenerife run in the early days, but both were here to earn a living - and the top dollar was earned by solo shows. Consequently Slam hung up their mics and pursued solo careers. Right now though, Slam have re-invented themselves and reformed as Slam Revisited. As you can see from the photograph, it depicts their former selves in the background as the original Slam and the foreground shows them now as Slam Revisited. The music put out by the duo was predominantly rock and, in particular, Meatloaf and Cher. The idea to give the show another run came one night as Suzie was travelling back from Los Gigantes from a solo
show when Spandau Ballet’s, Through The Barricades came on the radio. This got her thinking about Robbie because he performs this song in his Eighties’ Gold Show. She also thought about how she missed working in a duo and, more so, missed being part of Slam. So the next day she phoned Robbie … and the rest is history. Initially, the pair were just going to put a new show together. But after their first rehearsal, it was obvious their direction should follow the path of Meatloaf and Cher. I chatted with Robbie and Suzie at The Waterfall, Golf del Sur, last Sunday after they had finished their first show back together after almost 17 years Both were extremely happy with the crowd response, and Suzie was overwhelmed with the support Slam Revisited received. She told me she felt like a celebrity with all the positive comments they received from the audience. The well-produced show is story-lined and narrated by Jim Steinman, responsible for writing so many awardwinning songs contained within this one-hour show. Both artistes are still performing their solo gigs, but on a Tuesday night they can be seen together at The Harbour Club in Los Gigantes at 9pm. This means that one lucky venue (whoever
is quick enough to snap them up) will be able to book them for this exceptional show for a late gig on Tuesdays. After talking with Robbie on Tuesday afternoon, it was clear that his enthusiasm for this show is abundant. Robbie has a stage presence second to none, and a vocal power rarely heard in Tenerife. With his endless range, he is able to take on songs which are simply out of reach of others. Put that together with Suzie’s power as Cher and you’ve got a genuine show with Slam Revisited. And it has been enhanced with the superb production, which comes from the years of experience racked up by these performers. I believe Slam Revisited will be a force to be reckoned with, and it’s going to be difficult dealing with demand. At the moment, they are looking to fill the late spot on Tuesdays only. But watch this space because the excitement from both Robbie and Suzie about this reunion is so apparent, and I suspect more shows will be Slammed into their diary. The songs of Meatloaf and Cher are timeless classics, as are all of the songs in Jim Steinman’s discography. It’s a winning formula, and I wonder who will be first to get that Tuesday spot. To contact Slam direct, call 626 369 595. But be quick because these two performers are awesome and will be snapped up quickly.
Bafta’s 2015 nominations
Olivia’s four in a row OLIVIA Coleman is among the nominees for TV’s Bafta awards, for the fourth consecutive year. She is up for best female comedy performance for her role as a vicar’s wife in Rev. The 41-year-old won a Bafta last year for Broadchurch, and received two awards in 2013. Benedict Cumberbatch, 38, is up for best lead actor for Sherlock
- the third time he has been nominated for the role. Former Coronation Street star Sarah Lancashire, recognised last year for Last Tango in Halifax, is also nominated again, this time in the lead actress category for Happy Valley. James Norton is also nominated for his work in the Yorkshirebased crime drama, in the best support-
ing actor category. Cumberbatch’s competition includes Toby Jones, nominated for his portrayal of a man with learning difficulties in Marvellous, and James Nesbitt, shortlisted for his work in BBC One’s The Missing. Lancashire is up against Line of Duty star Keeley Hawes, Georgina Campbell nominated for the first time for Murdered by
My Boyfriend - and Sheridan Smith, feted for her role as a young Cilla Black in Cilla. Sheridan won a Bafta in 2013 for her brilliant performance in TV’s Mrs Biggs, and Cilla is also up for best miniseries alongside fellow ITV productions Prey and The Lost Honour of Christopher Jefferies. Happy Valley, Line of Duty and The Missing are included in the best
drama series category, as is BBC Two’s period crime drama Peaky Blinders. Murdered by My Boyfriend and Marvellous are nominated for the single drama award, alongside BBC One’s Common and BBC Two’s A Poet in New York. Tom Hollander, who played Dylan Thomas in the latter programme, is up for best male comedy performance in Rev.
Matt Berry, Hugh Bonneville and Brendan O’Carroll are also included in the category, for Toast of London, BBC satire W1A and the Mrs Brown’s Boys Christmas Special, respectively. Colman’s fellow nominees in the female comedy performance category include Bonneville’s W1A costar Jessica Hynes and Episodes’ Tamsin Greig.
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Wine and Dine
10th April - 16th April 2015
El Brezal At our Family-run Restaurant El Brezal, we serve fantastic international cuisine with fresh meats and fish. Try out specials such as beef stroganoff or sole walewska. We also have a choice of breakfasts, for which we use only British products, including sausage, bacon, hash browns and black pudding. At El Brezal we pride ourselves on providing high-quality food at competitive prices. When you dine with us you will not just be a customer, you will be part of the family. C.C. Apolo Center, Los Cristianos Open: Every day, 8am-11pm
Call: 922 787 619
The Palms Pool Bar & Restaurant Home of ‘Craig’s Creations’ - enjoy delicious gourmet food served at realistic prices in our beautiful restaurant or on our sunny terraces! Specials changing daily. Exciting new menu! Food served from 10am – 10pm daily and ‘Tipsy Time’ 4pm – 7pm. Star cabaret nights, call for details. Follow us on Facebook at The Palms Pool Bar. Palms Pool bar and Restaurant, Golf Del Sur
Call: 679 721 005 / 667 098 126 / 922 738 809
The Swan Try our new homemade menu from our new chef Tim, with all your favourites including: fish and chips, roast dinners, lasagne, steak pie, plus daily specials. If there’s anything you fancy t hat’s not on the menu, j ust give us 24hr notice and we will do it for you! Or just pop in for a drink, with live entertainment every night, 9pm - midnight, and your favourite quiz on Sunday evenings.
In front of Margarita Apartments, Los Cristianos
Open: 10am - Late. Food until 8pm
Call: 698 396 367
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Wine and Dine
10th April - 16th April 2015
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Lupita Parque de la Reina has a secret - Lupita restaurant is fast becoming the place to eat, and it has a well-deserved reputation. All the usual Mexican specialities are on offer, but from midday until 4pm, check out their 3.95 euro menu. You can have a bowl of soup or garlic bread, main meal (selection of 20) and espresso coffee, which is excellent value for money. Also, 4.95-euro and 5.95-euro menus available all day and all night. Now Open Mondays! Cañada Blanca 2, Parque de la Reina
Open: daily, 12noon - 11.30pm
Call: 677 381 869/645 581 621
Belgabar
Otelo
Belgabar has very quickly become a favourite for diners. Our selective menu includes the finest prime steak, fresh seafood and vegetable dishes and a tropical dining experience not to be missed. There is an extensive wine menu, which includes local produce, and a range of international beers. Belgabar menu is popular, so reservations are recommended. You must try the house special!
Otelo restaurants serve traditional Spanish cuisine specialising in delicious crispy garlic chicken and Canarian potatoes, plus all the tasty sauces. Try out our Canarian night, with our staff all dressed in national costumes and live Canarian music - at Otelo 1, with its gorgeous mountain views, on Monday night. Or Thursday night at Otelo 2, our beach-front restaurants.
Beachfront, The Patch, Las Americas, next to Burger King
Otelo I: Baranco Inferño. Otelo II: Fañabe Beach front
Open: 12pm til late
Open: Otelo I: 12noon - 11pm Otelo II: 11am - 11pm
Call: 677 397 204
Call: 922 780 374 / 922 716 342
Leo’s Italian & Grill
James’ Place
Come and taste the fine Italian cuisine served at Leo’s restaurant in Oasis Paserella. Authentic Italian cuisine with a modern twist with a set 3-course daily menu for just 9.95 euros (served until 5.30pm) plus a fantastic selection from the a la carte. You can’t fail to find something that will delight your taste buds. Try the amazing pastas, pizzas, fresh meat or fish and maybe indulge yourself in one of the homemade desserts.
The only British bar/restaurant and the jewel in the crown in La Caleta. Something for all the family with stylish dining area, sun-drenched terrace, games room and a fantastic menu. Sunday roasts available, freshly beerbattered fish and coming soon... our summer BBQ! James’ Place - Where we just haven’t met you yet!
C.C. Pasarella, Los Cristianos
La Caleta
Open: daily, 11am - 12am
Open: 10am - 10pm
Call: 922 788 872
Call: 922 168 139
Embrujo We offer the best products and dishes in Spanish cuisines. Allowing you to travel around Spain from North to South, to taste all the senses. You can choose from a wide selection of culinary specialties from Basque and Galician, Castilian, Andalusian and Canarian cuisine. From authentic Spanish omelette, oxtail, paellas, meat and fish all prepared with recipes of each region and the freshest products available. CC Americas Plaza, Las Americas
Call: 922 789 518 or 676 868 729
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Wine and Dine
10th April - 16th April 2015
The Swan, Parque Margarita
A real home from home WE went for a lovely little lunchtime option this week instead of our normal evening dining at The Swan in Parque Margarita, in Los Cristianos.
It has been running successfully for the last four years under the family ownership of Angela, Tony and Antony. They have now teamed up with head chef Tim, along with servers Amanda and Stuart to make you feel more than welcome, serving good quality, home-made pub grub. No fuss - just amazing taste. Head chef Tim, from Lancashire, is a City & Guilds qualified caterer, gaining experience in the Duncan Halgh Hotel before moving to Tenerife and continuing his career in the popular, well-known eateries of the Roast House and Surrey Arms. At his suggestion, we shared the Combo
of
starters, which came as a mouth-watering platter of Chicken Goujons, Onion rings, Samosas, Crispy wedges and juicy bread-crumbed mushrooms, with side-pots
of Garlic mayo, sweet chilli & Texan barbeque sauces. We followed this up with the Beer-battered fish and hand-cut, chunky chips, and one
the daily specials, Braised beef. The fish was light and fresh with the batter golden and crispy, which came with the option of mushy or garden peas, I’m a gardenpea kinda girl myself, but the choice is totally yours. The beef was braised in a red wine-and-onion gravy for a good few hours until it was so tender that it practically fell off the fork. It came served with creamy
“real” mash and three fresh veg. For simple, no-frills food, it is definitely 5-star quality. The Swan has lots of other specialities with a 24-hour order, such as lamb shanks or, one of Tim’s personal favourites, Fish paella. He likes to exercise his creativity with different sauces for different fishes and meats. Fancy something in particular? Just ask! Finally, he managed
to tempt us with a dessert to share: warm and moist chocolate brownies, served with dairy vanilla ice-cream and cream. Our arms were twisted, honestly! And not forgetting the little ones, there is a cracking “colour-in” children’s menu with kids’ traditional favourites, with smaller-sized portions of any meal off the main menu. On the beverage side they supply a nice range of house and known brand wines to go with your meals, such as Torres and Echo Falls. But I have to say, the cocktail list was impressive - ideal to sip while sitting on the terrace watching the entertainment, which is on at 9pm every evening. You can also find all the televised games and sporting fixtures to keep everyone happy. What more could you ask for? The Swan is open from 10am ‘til late, with food served until 8pm. To reserve a table, call 698 396 367.
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Lifestyle
10th April - 16th April 2015
HONEY,
Riding the fun train! By Vanessa Vee I DON’T want any laughs or sniggers as what we got up to this week. But all you parents know that arguing with children is just not worth the hassle half the time.
Especially if the request is not too unreasonable! On previous visits to England, it has always been classed as a treat to go on a “real” train. As you are probably aware, the nearest we can get to a train in Tenerife is a tram in the North, or, the South alternative ... the Tourist Train! You know the one I mean, the one your car or taxi gets stuck behind when you’re in a mad rush. My five-year-old has been harping on about riding on it for weeks, so I relented last week and decided to give it a whirl, along with my husband and my oneyear-old. It must have been hilarious for the driver to watch us park our car near Colon 2 in Las Americas, then cross the road to board the train! But we had no option. As much as we wanted to park round the corner and appear as tourists, the train was wait-
ing, with a car-parking space adjacent, so we had to go there. We dived on board - on the comfy bench seats along with another halfdozen passengers. And, shortly, we set off, heading up towards the Columbus Hotel, but performing a U-turn at the mini-roundabout before reaching it, and then past Leonardo’s before turning right up past Starco. We then ventured towards the police station before turning back into town. At this stage, hubby asked if that was it and we were now going back to the drop-off point at Santander Bank. I said that I hoped not because the guy said the trip lasted about an hour. This is quite an open road and that particular day was quite breezy, so we really felt the pinch. But it wasn’t long before we were back into town and heading towards El Camison. The train trundles along at a steady pace, allowing you to take in the sights and different areas of Playa de las Americas, with even some steady photo opportunities. We hang a left and drive the whole length of El Camison, and now it has turned into one big game of “guess the route”. We were banking on Los Cristianos, then down Avenida de Suecia for the return. But, surprisingly, we were
actually taken into the grounds of the new Parque Santiago 6 shopping Centre, followed by a ride around the car park, before pausing on a turfed area. We were somewhat confused by this, but the driver got out and, in large letters on the rear of his T-shirt, we read: “Parque Santiago 6”. I then remembered seeing that all the rooftop advertising boards on top of the train were all branded to our newest shopping centre in the South, so this was the perfect opportunity for them to create awareness. The stop was very brief, and were soon heading on down towards San Telmo, but taking a sharp right past Torres del Sol and the Safari Centre. At this stage we saw someone we knew, but, dare I admit, we slid down our seats in the hope of not being noticed. At this stage we were giggling at the ridiculousness of two adult residents, who have lived in the South for over 16 years, being driven around in what is more popularly known as the “Wally Trolley”. In fairness, I have been on one of these trains before, when I visited Cannes for the day while on a cruise. And, putting it all in perspective for visitors who have never visited the area before, it is actually the ideal way of seeing what’s on offer in the immediate area. There is a train based at Sal y Tien, Torviscas, Fanabe and the Colon 2 corner, and outside the Santander Bank in Las Americas - the one for which we opted. Being from Yorkshire, an afterthought would have been to simply follow the train in my car because I can think of better things on which I could have spent 23 euros. But one happy little girl got what she wanted, and that’s all that matters.
For train times and more information, please see www.tenerife-abc.com/TrenTuristic
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I’M HOME! By Carl from Robot
IF there’s one shade of blonde that’ll be hot this summer, it will be HONEY… that perfect blend of gold and warm shades, with just a few baby blonde lites thrown in for good measure.
It’s what a lot of our clients are asking for, and what we are blending together to produce the most amazing looking hilites, even on darker hair. The honey base lightens up the client’s natural shade enough to carry off the blonder, babyblonde hi-lites, looking sun-kissed and ready for summer here in Tenerife. Out goes anything too ashy because, in the sun, this can look a little harsh and always looks dryer. Opting for these shades will ensure that even when your regrowth comes through, the colour still looks good until your next touch-up. We also try to place the lighter section around the underneath of your hairline and outer edges to give you that “blonder” look without it showing too falsely on your crown and parting. Applying a lot of halites around this area looks great at first, but shows regrowth way too quickly, so keep this area more natural-
looking .Your honey shade can range from a deep gold to a subtle beige - anything that has warmth in it but no red. We don’t want brassy, but instead a naturallooking tone that complements the lighter tones running through your hair. If you’re used to seeing a full head of ashen hi-lites having this colour can come as a bit of a shock at first as its a more-toneddown blonde, but
not so in your face. Start by introducing some subtle pieces into your regular hilites if you’re a little scared to go all the way. This colour will lighten over time, so you are not stuck with it. Applying this colour, especially over very light hair, will also give your locks back some of their shine and healthy appearance. Anything that deposits colour will make it look and feel in better condition. Perfect examples of this colour can be seen on Jennifer Aniston and Cameron Diaz. They nearly always rock the “honey” shade as it really complements their skin tone and isn’t too brash on them. So the next time you’re in the mood for a blonde makeover, dig out the honey and really warm up your blonde tone.
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Community News
By Monica Dyson LIKE me, do you find you are more timid about things as you get older … that there are many more things to scare you than when you were younger?
Take driving. I’ve been a driver for nearly 40 years, having passed my test when I was about seven months pregnant and, possibly, because the examiner was afraid he might have to deliver the baby in his car! Now, in all that time I’ve never had any sort of untold incident. I’ve a clean licence, wouldn’t know what to do with points, whatever they are, and have never been “done” for using a mobile phone, or eating a sandwich, while I’m driving; or, amazingly, not even using my lipstick! But, I do not like driving at night, in bad weather or even at dusk, and I won’t drive on a motorway under any circumstances. If I absolutely ever had to, you’d know me, I’d be the one driving at 20mph on the inside lane! I feel positively ill at the thought of driving on a motorway in the
Phobias 10th April - 16th April 2015
nothing to fear! dark - and especially when it’s raining! I think it’s a combination of growing old, busier roads, aggressive drivers and the fear of the unknown. I find myself planning routes before I get into my car. And trying to avoid unfamiliar roundabouts, for instance, as we all know that they are the worst places for drivers who don’t signal their intentions. Things seemed so easy when I was young and could drive anywhere. But I must admit that road-rage hadn’t been invented then, and no one ever shouted “You silly old woman!” at me! And as for being a back-seat driver, you ask my husband. I invented the phrase, ‘Do you have to go so fast?’ And I never drive abroad! Help! The very thought! I’m also paranoid about safety in my home. I don’t believe I’ve got OCD. Well, perhaps just a little bit because I’m convinced everyone has it in some shape or form. And I practically lock the door when I go to the bin! And I’ve a friend who
won’t go into the city centre on her own under any circumstances. She’s worried about being mugged, although she can be excused because she once had her handbag stolen in one of the biggest stores. But we know that it’s just an age thing - that lack of confidence that attacks the elderly, O worrying about something that will probably never happen, and is not particularly anything to be concerned about. Yet many people have suffered from many more severe fears and phobias for ever, and they often ruin the quality of their lives. According to the National Institute of Mental Health, phobias affect approximately 10% of adults. There are a number of explanations given for why these develop, including evolutionary and behavioural theories. Whatever the problem, it seems that they are treatable conditions which can be overcome with cognitive and behavioural-therapy techniques. Some fears are more
common than others. These can lead to dizziness, nausea and breathlessness and, some cases, escalating into a full-blown panic attack. One of the worst fears, and the most irrational. is of flying, called pteromerhanophobia. What a waste of time that is. There are so many people who have denied themselves the chance of seeing wonderful parts of the world, experiencing other cultures, never standing in wonderment in front of the Taj Mahal or Pyramids, or spending winter months in Tenerife. And all because they won’t seek help. A friend of mine has never yet seen his baby grandchild because his fear of getting on a plane is greater than his desire to see the child. But he views any sort of help to conquer his fears as unmanly - something to be ashamed of doing. This fear is often linked with a fear of heights, called Acrophobia, when people often have panic attacks at the thought of having to travel in a lift, or look
at the view from a tall building. Also linked with this may be Agoraphobia and also Claustrophobia, which is a fear of situations in which escape is difficult. These may include crowded areas, open spaces or situations likely to trigger a panic attack. People are often so afraid at the thought of facing any of these situations that many of them, in extreme cases, may refuse to leave their homes. I once had nightmares when I’d watched a film in which a woman was locked in a car boot. I soon forgot about it, but, for many people, they have this sort of fear constantly. You can go on for ever. Ophidiophobia is the fear of snakes and, as with Cynophobia (fear of dog)s, can usually be linked to personal experiences, often in childhood, as can Androphobia, the fear of men. Astraphobia is the fear of thunder and lightning. Many people hide when there is a storm, closing the curtains in their home. This fear is also called Brontopho-
bia, Tonitrophobia and Ceraunophobia. What I actually want to know, even though I am very sympathetic, is, who on earth came up with these names? Then there is Ablutophobia, which is a fear of washing or bathing. No, this can’t be used as an excuse by teenage boys! Aichmophobia, a fear of cats, is always an emotive issue anyway, with people either loving or hating them But this is much more than dislike: it’s a real fear! It is important to face your fears and phobias, and realise that they are highly treatable. You don’t have to spend your life suffering. There is self-help, counselling, psychotherapy and cognitive behavioural therapy. None of these is as fearsome as they may sound. Your doctor will be sympathetic and recommend the correct treatment. You’d go to him if had flu wouldn’t you? Phobias are just another medical condition, and it won’t be something new as far as he is concerned!
Live Arico news
Our dog of the week JACK Sparrow is a twoyear-old Parson Russell Terrier, a close relative of the Jack Russell, and came from the illegal puppy farm in the north. He is full of character and a friendly little chap, who now needs a home of his own. Can this be you? If so, call Sue on 629 388 102 for
more information. Top Square delight What an awesome night we had! There was not a seat to be found last Friday night at our Easter Extravaganza fund-raiser. The kids had a great time, hunting out Easter eggs, and entertainment was provided by Spencer Robson, Alfie,
Caroline on the accordion, Colin Stevens, Slam, Barry Santana, Michaela Jay and Tanya Tevaro. Thank you Bill and Heather for your Guessthe -name - of-the - dog prize, and to our star, Becki, for gathering those guesses tirelessly. Thanks also to Ashro Autos, Howards Smokehouse, Arcadia Restaurant, Karen Edwards, Revs Motors and Jack Hardman for raffle prizes and auction items. We raised 800 euros for Tasha, a German shepherd knocked down and left for dead. She now has horrendous injuries to overcome - and
she will do it - with your help. Thank you for always supporting us. See you
on the Top Square in June. Sangha at The Smokehouse. We are holding a fundraising dinner at Howards Smokehouse, Golf de Sur, on Tuesday, 28th April, from 8pm, in collaboration with Sangha Sanctuary San Miguel. Enjoy the hot and cold buffet, followed by entertainment. Tickets are 15 euros, obtainable from Sue on 629 388 102. Our Shop news All is going well at our new charity shop on the Golf, and remember that our vet, Cesar Bertoldi, is with us every Wednesday morning from 10am-noon, offer-
ing advice on all aspects of your pet’s healthcare. Come and have a chat with him. We are situated at Golf Park, on the loop road round, before the lottery kiosk. We are open between 10am4pm, Monday to Saturday. We also have shops in Los Cristianos, Calle Revron near Churchills Bar, and San Eugenio opposite Hotel La Nina by Amandas bar at las Carabelas complex. Both shops open from 10am-4pm, Monday to Friday, and until 3pm om Saturdays and Sundays. Come and have a browse, bag a bargain and help the animals.
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Community News
10th April - 16th April 2015
Lions International
Grand day for Grand Draw ARONA Lions Club, of Las Galletas and Costa del Silencio, is hosting an afternoon of fun and live entertainment on Sunday (12th April at El Americano Restaurant (opposite Leonardos) in Las Americas. It runs from 2pm until 8pm, in association with Tenerife Sunshine.com, and your host, as always, is the club’s own Derrick. Live entertainment is provided by Emma Jensen, Scott Bateman, Jacqui Peters, Hayley Butler, Hollie Bourne, Eddie Hastings, Slam (Suzi Q and Robbie Dominic), Lisa Bridges, Luke Carey,
David Salmon, Mister Sister and Simon King. There will be a Raffle, Tombola and Craft stalls. Food and Mojitos will be on sale for a special price, with other cocktails on sale at normal prices. During the afternoon, the winning ticket for a Fred Olsen cruise in October will be drawn. Tickets are still available at any Tenerife Sunshine.com shop. Please support a worthy cause and have some fun! All funds raised remain on the Island to help needy people, and the Lions also help people through local social services.
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Caring Swallows are flying so high MEMBERS of the Swallows group have surpassed themselves by collecting a staggering 12,500 euros for Tenerife’ Cancer Research, which is their best-ever total. The group has grown
considerably in numbers over the past five years with increased activities and events, and, accordingly, the annual funds have swelled by the year. From a regular annual total of less than 2,000 euros, it has grown
and grown under the guidance of leaders Carole and Mike Hart. A delighted Carole said: “Since we took over in late 2008, the Swallows have raised a total of 47,475 euros, thanks to your support
and generosity. And long may it continue.” She added: “We have had many laughs and also some tears along the way. We have made new friends and we have lost some dear ones, especially Joyce.”
K9 news, and some loveable pups
Our family is ever-changing
Lions focus is all on disadvantaged kids SAN Miguel Lions Club held the final fund-raiser of their season in the form of a Sixties do at Coral Bar, Coral Mar, in Costa del Silencio. A fantastic afternoon was had by all, thanks to entertainer Aidy Evans. Winners of the Fun Quiz each received a bottle of wine and a Easter Egg,with many being donated for the admission-tickets’ draw. With the final fundraiser now gone, the days are rattling on towards the crowning of a new President at the beginning of July. So look out for the club’s President’s Night bash on
Saturday 27th June, which is always memorable. May is our Disadvantaged Children´s Holiday project with the kids here from 5-12th May for a genuine Holiday of a Lifetime. And boy, do they always enjoy it, thanks to the annual generosity of all our tourism hot-spot owners. Club secretary Ralph says: “July and August are when we have a bit of a rest, just helping in the Charity Shop. But we’ll be back with fund-raisers in September. So look out, all you kind people who support our many causes.
Coral Bar boss Janette, Chef Cara plus “Wet Patch” are presented with a “Thank-You” certificate by Lions Jackie and Ralph
FOR more than 20 years, we have been helping abandoned animals in Tenerife with food, shelter, and veterinary care. Dogs come and go all the time, and among those rehomed recently have been Luca and Judith. Luca flew to Belgium to start his new life, and Judith has found a home on the Island. For those who remember the three puppies who arrived in November, this is Boba, She is now called Jade, is all grown-up, and has come back to be neutered. We wish them all lots of happiness in their new homes. If you are looking for a dog, come and visit us. We have an ever-changing family, and will find the best dog for you. That might be Glen, a loving little boy. He is very skinny and needs building up, but he will make a great companion. We also have four puppies who will be medium-to-big dogs. They are four months old and,
with a little training, will soon become civilised members of your household. They are all good with children and cats and we would like to find homes for them before they get any older. We have no support other than raising funds with the public’s help. If you want to help, there are several ways you can support us so that we can continue our work to save animals’ lives.
We are looking for people to donate just one euro a month. It’s not a lot - less than the cost of a cup of coffee - but with lots of people donating, it can make a huge difference. There is no hassle, no long-term commitment; you can stop at any time. So please, join our Teaming Group by signing into our website https://www. teaming.net/refugiok9 tenerife?lang=en_UK. Simply entering your euro currency bank details or your credit/debit card on to the safe system, and you, too, can do your bit. Another way of helping is if you have an old mobile phone. Please give it to K9 as it can be recycled and a little bit of money made. The K9 Shop in Alcala Plaza is a main source of income, with all monies raised going to the care of the dogs and cats at the refuge. Running a business and having fresh stock isn’t easy, but we have man-
aged remarkably well, despite the difficulties. If you can help with donations please call in. The shop is open each day from 10am until 2pm, except Sunday. And if you need an item collecting, please call 611 353 801 or 646 561 035. So come over, have a browse, bag a bargain and help the animals. One important thing to know about dogs is that there are always lots of walkies involved. So if you have any time to spare, do come and take a dog or two for a walk, or pop into the kennels and play with the puppies. They will be thrilled. The kennels are open EVERY day from 11am until 2pm and anyone is welcome to drop in. If you have any inquiries, or are looking for a dog or cat, the number to call is 667 638 468. Paws for thought Spotted on a T-shirt in Las Americas: “Not everybody wants a rescue dog. But every rescue dog wants somebody.”
CW 44
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Lifestyle
10th April - 16th April 2015
Low-cal fizzy drinks are a fat lot of good
Close up & personal... By Val Sainsbury By Nico Gil
of Activate Sports Club
IT’S “too expensive”, “a waste of money”, “unnecessary” and so on. Yes, personal training is seriously under-valued and greatly misunderstood by those who have never tried it!
Those who have are only too aware of the long lists of advantages to having a tailor-made exercise programme and a professional motivator to help you to achieve maximum results. In fact, most personal trainers have their own personal trainer to keep themselves in tiptop condition. Group classes are fine, so long as their rigid timetable is compatible with your busy, unpredictable lifestyle, and provided you are doing the exercises correctly, of course. But there is a reason - in fact, there are a whole bunch of very good reasons - why personal training is now more popular than ever. Here are just a few: *It’s just for you: Sounds obvious, doesn’t it, but a personal training plan takes into account every little thing about your life: your work and family schedule; any past or present injuries or illnesses; exercises you particularly hate doing; your dietary needs; what stresses you out and, of course, what you want to achieve. This all combines to give you the best, most realistic and most efficient programme possible. *Motivation: Even the strongest-willed will admit that it is sometimes hard to motivate yourself, especially when you exercise on your own. Working with a personal trainer in-
creases your motivation to keep going, as your trainer is there to guide and encourage you every step of the way, especially when you need it the most. *Commitment: And when I say this, I mean mutual. Both trainer and client need to commit fully, or it will never work. When you exercise on your own, it is far too easy to miss a session and, eventually, give up. When you work with a trainer, he or she will make it much more likely that you stick with your programme. It’s not the same when you have to phone someone to cancel a session! *Technique: Personal training isn’t just about the exercises you do – it’s about the way you learn how to do them in the correct way, targeting the desired muscle groups and preventing injury in the process. It’s also about learning how to exercise correctly for the rest of your life, long after your private sessions have finished. Your trainer will teach you the proper way to perform each exercise and will demonstrate the movements, as well as watching and correcting your posture and technique along the way. *Variety: An experienced, personal trainer will incorporate an enormous variety of exercises into your sessions, to see which work best for you, and which you most enjoy. This will avoid boredom setting in and will also allow for changes to be made as you progress and develop. Swimming, yoga, running technique, func-
tional fitness, Pilates and resistance training are just some examples that can all be incorporated successfully into your programme. No two sessions should be identical. *Efficiency: A professional personal trainer is able to make the most of every minute of your workout, which is especially important if you have limited time to exercise in a week. You’ll be amazed at what you can get out of two hour-long sessions a week. *Flexibility: One of the biggest advantages of personal training is that is gives you the ultimate flexibility. You choose how often you see your trainer, and at a time that suits you. There is even the possibility to train in your own home. If you develop a leg injury, you can work on the upper body. The flexibility is incomparable with every other form of training. Depending on your gym there is even the possibility of a crèche to look after your child while you train. *Results: At the end of the day, the results speak for themselves. After all, the reason anyone embarks on any sort of training programme is generally to look and feel noticeably better than he or she did beforehand. Otherwise, what’s the point? Personal training sessions produce infinitely better results, every time. Fancy getting personal with me or another member of the Activate team? Email me at nico@tenerifeactivate. com for more information.
Address: Calle Roques del Salmor, 38679 Costa Adeje, Santa Cruz de Tenerife. Tel: 822 070 037
DIETERS opting for low-calorie fizzy drinks to help boost weight loss may see their waistlines expand instead. Rather than encouraging the pounds to drop off, a new study has shown that drinking diet pop adds inches to the waist. Scientists at the University of Texas examined the lifestyles of 749 Mexican-American and European-American people over the course of nine years, in which 466 participants survived. They tracked the number of fizzy drinks each person consumed, and whether or not they were diet drinks. They found that those who indulged in at least one diet drink a day gained three inches or more on their waistlines. The participants were interviewed at the beginning of the study and at three follow-up visits, where researchers measured their waists and other parameters. Of those who said they never consumed diet fizzy drinks, waist circumference increased by less than one inch over the nine-year study period, said Sharon Fowler, one of the study’s lead authors. Among those reporting occasional consumption - drinking under one diet can a day - waist circumference increased by around two inches. And for the group who said they consumed diet fizzy drinks every day - often more than once a day -
waist circumference increased by more than three inches. Past studies have highlighted the dangers of accumulating fat around the waist. Researchers have linked visceral fat which builds up around internal organs - with increased inflammation and risk of metabolic disease, diabetes, heart attack, stroke, cancer and mortality. Dr Fowler said: “Because the study measured waist circumference as well as total weight, we were able to look at what happened to participants’ abdominal obesity. “The increases in abdominal fat were more than three times as great in daily diet pop users as in non-users. “This is during the very time in life when increasing waist circumference is associated with increased risk of these serious medical conditions, and mortality itself.” In 2008, the same scientists published research which looked at the association between drinking artificially-sweetened drinks, and long-term weight gain in participants. They found that among more than 3,600 Mexican-Americans and European-Americans, aged 25-65 and tracked for seven to eight years, body mass index and the risk of obesity rose consistently the more artificially-sweetened drinks a person consumed. As part of the new study, the researchers adjusted statistically for a large number of variables that
could have affected the findings, including initial waist size, exercise level - and whether the participant had diabetes or smoked. “Even when you adjust for those things, you have this independent effect of diet fizzy-drink onsumption on waist circumference change over time,” said senior author Dr Hazuda. And Dr Fowler added: “There is definitely debate about whether the association between diet pop intake and cardiometabolic risk, which has been detected in several large, observational studies, is based on an actual causal relationship. “We are simply reporting the statistical association we found: that, over almost a decade, waist circumference increased significantly, in a dose-response manner, with increasing diet pop intake in this group of older individuals. “These results are consistent with findings from a number of other observational studies of increased long-term risk of diabetes, heart attack, stroke and other major medical problems among daily diet pop users.” The study’s findings were most pronounced among those people who were already overweight or obese at the outset of the research. “In spite of these limitations, however, the evidence, taken together with relevant findings from other studies in both humans and animals, is pretty compelling,” said Dr Hazuda.
www.canarianweekly.com 10th April - 16th April 2015
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45 CW
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Fashion
10th April - 16th April 2015
DE-NEW DENIM! By Carl Pattison
RIGHT on the back of this year’s hot trend of Seventies-inspired fashion, our old and trusted favourite DENIM comes right back at us.
It shows that no matter what, jeans and their derivative fashions will always be around. Once used as a fabric for the “workers” in California, denim is now at the forefront of nearly every fashion house’s collection. Their jean brands are their bread and butter, so to speak, and everyone owns at least one pair, And as fashions change, so we like to be seen in THE must-have styles. But denim isn’t only about casual wear. It can be seen on all major runways, from the likes of Zara up to your couture brands such as Carvalli and Dior.
Such a cheaply-made material can have that million-dollar look, just from the cut, and also the styling. Yet if not worn correctly, denim can make anyone look cheap - it’s just a matter of how and when it is used. So what’s big on the blue-cotton scene, and how can you get that “denim look” just right? Okay, let’s start with colours. If you are after this year’s look, go for slightly-stonewashedand-faded rather than dark, traditional blue. Try not to overdo the ripped look, and keep away from anything that’s dark but has been blast-washed. This is a big no-no. But it has been seen on the streets and tends to look “tacky Eighties” than retro Seventies. Mixing different shades together - even clashing denims - can look stunning. And even the “don’t-ever-do-it” double denim looks good, as long as you keep both denim shades at opposite ends of the colour scale. For example, very
light mixed with darker. But never go for complementing top and bottom unless you want to look like someone out of Status Quo. And keep combination denim subtle. Guys, you have your choice this year in teaming up denim justabove-the-knee shorts with a sleeveless denim shirt … great for summer. Or go for skinny, roughed-up denim, slightly-cropped at the ankle. But no socks, though, please! You don’t have to limit your denim statements to your clothing. There bags and even shoes that rock your “jeans” look, and they are quite timeless as denim never really goes out of fashion. Unless, of course, your trouser bottoms are wider than your shoe size because flares are yet to make a comeback. So if you have some jeans you used to wear but look a bit dated as they’re a little too dark, why not stick them on a couple of boil washes on
their own with a slash of household bleach to fade them up a bit. Once dried, “attack” with sandpaper in strategic points knees and rear, for instance - to give them a worn look. A razor blade used carefully to slash a knee or thigh zone … and “voila”, your own personalised jeans at a fraction of the price. D o n ’ t overdo it, though, as you do not want it to look t a c k y. T h e trend is “worn i n ” and not “ w o r n out”. And please ladies, can we get away from the denim hot-pants with everything on show as I push
my trolley around Mercadona. It’s not sexy just a s k a n y guy.
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Puzzle Page
10th April - 16th April 2015
PRIZE Godoku!
WIN! Tickets for bowling at Megabowl
WIN! 2 tickets to see The Sound of Musicals
47 CW
CW Crossword
The rules of Godoku are simple just enter the letters stated below once in each row, column and 3 x 3 square within the puzzle grid. When you have completed it, a word will appear. Email the answer to info@canarianweekly.com before 5pm on Wednesday 15th April 2015 and you’ll be in with a chance of winning.
Last Week’s winner (Issue 896): Becky Francis Please come up to the OasisFm / Canarian Weekly offices to pick up your prize. You have until 15th May 2015 to pick up and use your vouchers.
This week’s letters: A D E H I K N R T This week’s mystery clue: In the title of a murder mystery by CM Thompson, what lies here (9 letters).
A R H T N E D N T
E T R K
T
A E H I
A
I N D A H I E K R
Winning Caption (Issue 896): “Didn’t I see you in Madrid last week?” Winner: Rachael Wilks
Please come up to the OasisFm / Canarian Weekly offices to pick up your prize. You have until 15th May 2015 to pick up and use your vouchers.
30-Second Brain Training Sudoku X...
Just enter the numbers 1 - 9 once in each row, column and 3 x 3 square within the sudoku X puzzle grid. In addition to standard sudoku, the numbers must only occur once in each side of the ‘X’ that is marked on the grid.
4 6 8 9 1
What better way to train your brain. Starting at the left with the number provided, work across each of these lines applying the mathematical instructions to your running total. Don´t reach for the calculator - that´s cheating! Write your final answer in the last box of the line. Aim to complete each round in about 30 seconds. Good Luck! Beginner Starter Number
9 1 5 2 8 3 9 4 3
1
2
3
÷3
17
x4
-41
6
7
8
-7
x13
-18
5
4
+43
÷4
Answer
9
3/5
of this
Intermediate Starter Number
2 9 7 3 6 8
240
1
2
3
3/4
of this
-114
5/6
of this
6
7
8
9
+62
÷2
+78
1
2
5
4
+73
÷8
Starter Number
3 2 8 6 9
6
42
-167
x4 +112 7
8
x7 +157
of this 9
30%
5
4
-106
squared
Answer
of this
And 2 normal sudokus for you aswell...
2
7
3
9
2 9 1
9 3 6 1
8 3 7 6 2
5
8
4
9
Assume the number of oranges is A. Then A-1 is divisible by 3, 5, 7, and 9. So, A-1 is a multiple of 5×7×9 = 315 (note: 9 is also a multiple of 3, so 3 must not be included!). We are looking for a value of N for which holds that 315×N + 1 is divisible by 11. After some trying it turns out that the smallest N for which this holds is N = 3. This means that the greengrocer has at least 946 oranges. Note that for N = 14, 25, 36, etc. (so each time 11 more) it also holds that 315×N + 1 is divisible by 11.
CW Crossword
ACROSS 1. TOM-CAT 4. SLIP UP 9. LAUGH 10. UPSTAGE 11. TREASURY 12. HERO 15. LAPTOP 17. CHASED 19. SLAG 20. MINISTER 23. WIPE OUT 24. ENNUI 25. YONDER 26. ASSETS DOWN 1. TOLD TALES 2. MOUSE 3. ADHESION 5. LOST 6. PLANETS 7. PIE 8. QUIRK 13. ORDERLIES 14. SHRIVELS 16. PLAYPEN 18. TILTS 21. TENSE 22. DOZE 23. WHY
Godoku:
2 8
5 6
1
8 6 2 4 5
6 5 7 2
9 5 1 4
Beginner: 28 Intermediate: 57 Advanced: 23
Sudoku X: 6 3 9 7 4 1 8 5 2 8 4 5 6 9 2 3 7 1 3 6 8 9 7 4 2 1 5 7 5 1 2 8 3 6 9 4 2 9 4 1 5 6 7 3 8
6
3 4 7 1 8
Brain Training:
1 2 7 5 3 8 9 4 6
9
5 9 8 1 2 4
3 8 6 9
Water Bucket Calculate the minimum outside surface of a cylindrical bucket with an open upper side, which can hold 30 liters of water. The Question: What is the minimum outside surface? Solution to: Odd Oranges
of this
3
by Trevor Kirton
Last Issue's Answers:
2/3
3/7
DOWN 1 Internet message (1-4) 2 Aquatic missile (7) 3 Portend, foretell (6) 4 Wore away (6) 5 Unambiguous (8) 6 Jewish teacher (5) 7 Swarms (7) 12 Body-bone frame (8) 13 Below freezing (7) 15 Furtiveness (7) 16 Uncouth, crude (6) 18 Shabby (5) 20 Jeans material (5) 21 Crazy (4)
this week’s Riddles
Answer
Advanced
5 8 4
ACROSS 1 Consume food (3) 3 Car-horn sounds (5) 8 Fruit (5) 9 Airfield (9) 10 Ogle (4) 11 Multi-signed request (8) 13 Eerie (6) 14 Touches with the lips (6) 17 Enmity, ill-will (3,5) 19 Consign, dispatch (4) 22 Waterproof canvas (9) 23 Cowboy contest (5) 24 Destitute (5) 25 Garment border (3)
5 1 2 3 6 7 4 8 9 4 7 6 8 1 9 5 2 3 9 8 3 4 2 5 1 6 7
Sudoku: 2 4 3 8 9 1 5 6 7
5 6 3 4 7 2 9 1 8
5 7 1 3 6 2 4 9 8
1 7 4 9 3 8 2 5 6
6 9 8 5 7 4 1 2 3
9 2 8 6 5 1 3 4 7
9 1 6 7 3 8 2 5 4
7 3 1 5 6 9 4 8 2
7 3 2 1 4 5 6 8 9
6 5 2 8 1 4 7 9 3
4 8 5 6 2 9 7 3 1
4 8 9 7 2 3 1 6 5
1 5 7 9 8 6 3 4 2
2 1 5 3 9 6 8 7 4
3 2 9 4 5 7 8 1 6
3 4 7 1 8 5 6 2 9
8 6 4 2 1 3 9 7 5
8 9 6 2 4 7 5 3 1
CW 48
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Information / Free Ads
How to Advertise: Page 48
PHONE 902 232 102 / FAX 902 232 102 / Email: classified@canarianweekly.com Or just pop in the office in Las Chafiras (next to the Golf Shop). Upto 500 euros only.
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Advertise your property or classified advert here. 20 euros per week (30 words maximum) double size box
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10th April - 16th April 2015
British Consulate Address: Plaza Weyler, 8, 1º, 38003 Santa Cruz de Tenerife. Public opening hours: Tuesdays & Fridays: 08.30hrs – 13.30hrs Notarial services: Please consult our webpage or call 902 109 356 or alternatively +34 913 342 194 for further information on how to make an appointment. Please note, we are no longer able to provide notarial services without prior appointment. Emergency Assistance: Assistance is available 24hrs a day, 7 days a week by calling us on 902 109 356 or alternatively +34 913 342 194 E-mail: info.consulate@fco.gov.uk Web:http//: ukin spain.fco.gov.uk Cosumer Office Tel: 922 76 16 00 Town Hall Tel: 922 76 16 00 Emergencies Emergency Services (All) Tel: 112 National Police - Tel: 091 Local Police Tel: 092 Ambulance Tel: 061 Fire Brigade Tel: 080 Guardia Civil Tel: 062 Multi-lingual police central office Tel: 902 102 112 Call this number and ask to speak to an English operator to make a report or official complaint. Local Police Tel: 922 75 70 06
Red Cross Emergencies and Ambulances Tel: 922 28 18 00 Information and Blood Bank Tel: 922 28 29 24 International MEDSERVICE Tel: 922 79 05 63 Medical Benefits Agency Tel: (00 44) 191 218 7547 For if you find yourself in medical difficulties whilst on holiday and without the proper holiday insurance.
1 module box advert
Advertise your service advert here. 80 euros for 4 weeks* advertising (20 euros per week) Please ask us for prices for larger size adverts. All property, classified and service point have to be paid for in cash at our officces in Las Chafiras. *Service point adverts have to be in for a minimum of 4 weeks. Deadline: Tuesday 4pm
Shopping Most shops open from Mon - Sat 09:00 - 13:00 then 16:00 - 20:00 Some shops may open for just Saturday Morning, and many shops are closed on Sundays and Tourist Offices, Bank Holidays, with the exception of souvenir shops which tend to open 7 days a week.
Pharmacy Information and Locator (24 hours) Tel: 922 28 24 24 Citizen Information Tel: 010 Postal Services Tel: 902 19 71 97 International Operator Tel: 11825 Local Operator Tel: 11818 Tourist Information Tel: 922 60 55 90 Hospitals & Medical Centres (Answering Machine) Tel: 094 Hospital Las Americas, Playa de las Americas Tel: 922 75 00 22 Playa de Las Americas Centro Medicos Del Sur Tel: 922 79 10 00 Candelaria Hospital Tel: 922 60 20 00
Tourist Offices Tenerife Sur Tourist Office (Main Tourist Office) Tel: 902 00 31 21 Santa Cruz de Tenerife Tel: 922 28 93 94 Santiago de Teide Tel: 922 86 03 48 Costa Adeje Tel: 922 75 06 33 Puerto de la Cruz Tel: 922 38 60 00 El Medano Tel: 922 17 60 02 La Laguna Tel: 922 63 11 94 La Orotava Tel: 922 32 30 41 Las Galletas Tel: 922 73 01 33 Los Cristianos Tel: 922 75 71 37 Los Llanos de Aridane Tel: 922 40 18 99 Playa de las Américas Tel: 922 79 76 68 Playa de las Vistas Tel: 922 78 70 11
Beach Safety Obey the beach warning flags and always supervise children when near water. Red - Strong currents do not swim
Tour Operators TUI/ Thomson Tel: 922 77 77 20 Thomas Cook Tel: 922 757 409 Cosmos Tel: 922 793 802
How to submit your free adverts: PHONE 902 232 102 Email: classified@canarianweekly.com Just pop in the office in Las Chafiras (above Juno). Deadline for Free ads is Tuesdays at 4pm. Up to 500 euros only.
Page 49 Lineage 35 euros for 4 weeks
Yellow - Strong winds and turbulent sea conditions. Take care. Green - Safe to swim
Black & Decker steam mop, boxed with various attachments. 100 euros. Tel: 922 710 115 Pair of light beige/oatmeal patio door curtains, lined, pleated tops, to fit 240cm x 240cm, 20 euros. Old-style TV, working, with separate silver TV stand, fair cond, 15 euros for all, Palm Mar. Tel: 618 657 888. Microwave & grill 35 euros. TDT with remote, 15 euros. Ceiling fan with lamp, 25 euros. Camping gas, 20 euros. DVD playervideo recorder combo, remote, 45 euros. DVD player, 25 euros. VCR player, 20 euros. Butane gas bottle, 40 euros each, 3 for 110 euros. Two orange juicers, 10 euros each. Deep-fat fryer, 20 euros. Cordless home phone, 10 euros. Table lamp with shade, 10 euros. Computer monitor, 25 euros. Child 's car seat, up to
Transport TFS - Tenerife Sur Airport (Reina Sofia) For flights from the Spanish mainland and nearly all scheduled international flights. Telephone numbers: Flight Information 902 404 704 (lines open 24 hours) Airport Information Tel: 922 75 90 00 Tourist Information Tel: 922 392 037 TFN - Tenerife Norte airport (Los Rodeos) For all domestic flights and some scheduled international and mainland services. Telephone numbers: Flight Information Tel: 902 404 704 (lines open 24 hours) General Information Tel: 922 635 800 Buses TITSA is Tenerife´s public bus company. Tel: 922 53 13 00 The ´Bono-Bus´ discount card can be purchased from all TITSA stations and terminals of TITSA and reduces the cost of transport by up to 30%. Radio Taxis Tel: 922 64 11 12 N.B. Taxi cabs display a special SP (Servico Público) licence plate. Arona Taxis Tel: 922 74 75 11 National Ferry Services Fred Olsen Tel: 922 62 82 52
18kg, 20 euros. 200 PC games, 3 euros each. Tel: 686 336 904 2 Mountain bikes: 1 lady's, vgc, 90 euros. 1 unisex, 90 euros, Silencio area. Tel: 697 746 885 2 Single beds Flex-sprung mattresses and bases; white wood headboards, 75 euros each. White Moulinex compact turbo over (fan-assisted with rotisserie, 35 euros. Whirlpool M541 white microwave oven, 20 euros. Collect from Adeje. Tel: 922 716 621 or 0044 7715 791237 Ladies authentic Calvin Klein watch, gold, face white with 3 tiny diamonds, 150 euros ono. New DKNY watch, unisex gold & white ceramic with diamante front, 150 euros ono. Genuine Lady Chloe sunglasses, dark green 40 euros. Binoculars: 1 x 7 x 50 navy Artillery, 250 euros ono. Zenith 7 x 50 like new, coated optics field 71, 200 euros ono. New Prada shoes, dark-blue leather and material, size 43-44, 50 euros. Bag of new indoor golf training gear, 35 euros. Bag of video games, (about 50), 50 euros. Original Formula 1 shirt, XL Black, Torro Rosso Red Bull infinite team with all decals, new, 90 euros. Black leather jacket, new (Springfield), 60 euros ono. Los Cristianos. Tel: 657 450 885
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Free Ads / Classified
10th April - 16th April 2015
Property for renT
Jobs (cont.)
Property for renT (cont.) KANDI RENTALS
Urgently require landlords Tenants call with your requirements. All areas. Call Kandi 611 264 119
Property for sale 2 Caravans – Tel: 697 746 885
Ref: 73904794. CLUB PARAISO, PLAYA PARAISO. Studio with loungediner, kitchen, 1 bathroom, terrace. Communal pool. 51.900 Euros
Ref: 73060065. LOS ABRIGOS. 49.01 m2, 1 bedroom, 1 bathroom apt situated near the seafront. 62.400 Euros
Camping
Nauta,
49 CW
quiet
plot.
€5,500.
Cars/BIKES
The ideal candidate must be keen, focused, flexible, reliable and in possession of a good standard of English. Attention to detail is a definite must as is the ability to work under pressure. You will require excellent Word and Excel skills. Previous experience in a similar role would be an advantage however full training will be given to the right candidate. If you think you can bring something positive to the team email your CV to complianceoffice@regencyshoressl.com telling us why we should hire you now. A successful company in the South of Tenerife require a Supervisor to work with a multi-lingual team in hotels. A minimum of 1 year supervisory experience is required as well as sales/customer service experience. Fluent English is essential. Excellent package for the successful applicant with basic wage, company car and bonuses. Email your CV in English to jobs@suncarecentral.com or call Louise on 651 170 660. Telemarketers are required for a busy office environment in Adeje. Flexible working hours. Basic wage plus commission. Easy parking and fantastic working conditions. Contact Sarah on (0034) 922 758 425 or email: admin@sloncemarketing.com
Air-conditioning Ref: 73053502. COSTA DEL SILENCIO.
Res. Atlantico: 3 bedroom, 1 bathroom aparment with terrace, and underground parking space. Communal pool.
122.300 Euros
Ref: 73127146. EL MADROÑAL. Town house on Calle El Sause, Mirador de la Gomera, 3 bedrooms, garden & garage. 293.200 Euros
www.thepropertygallery.com Disabled-friendly ground floor studio, 100m from beach, Los Cristianos. UK TV. 425 euros p/month. Tel: 632 518 114
Air conditioning and refrigeration. Tel: 639 361 181 or 688 620 707 or see electrical.
Antiques ALADDINS CAVE. Antiques & Vintage Goods bought & sold Tel: 922 720 493
Auction Fortnightly General Auctions at Tenerife Auction Rooms, Las Chafiras. Buy and sell almost anything! Collection & delivery available. Call 609 303 634
Blinds
Jobs Due to expansion, Eze Group are looking to fill a position in our busy Sales office situated in Los Cristianos. Duties will include conducting customer compliance interviews and assisting within the contracts department. (No collecting involved).
CW 50
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Classified / Service Point
10th April - 16th April 2015
Construction (cont.)
Cars
Garden Furniture
Health & Beauty www.fitnesswithdebbie.com Tel: 664 576 779 www.yogavibetenerife.com
Home removal
Kitchens & bathrooms Colin Taylor – Renovations & Maintenance, Bathrooms, Kitchens, Tiling, Plumbing, Decorating, Plastering etc. Tel: 661 081 843 for quotation.
Lawyers Chiropodist Ann Malpass M.A.F.H.P. M.C.F.H.P. Qualified Chiropodist. All your foot care needs solved in the comfort of your own home/hotel. Tel 625 799 570 Elaine Watson Jones MSSCh MBChA. Based in Los Cristianos. I offer perosnal visits to the South of Tenerife. Tel: 608 029 790. Email: canarianfeet@gmail.com
Cleaning
Elite Cleaning Services is an established cleaning company who can provide a professional cleaning service for Apartments, Villas and Offices. Call us today on 922 789 795 or 696 922 597.
Marble flooring
Computers
Driving School
Telephone: 922 736 728 E-mail: Computer Service Provider BT Authorised Dealer Dell Registered Partner
info@act-tenerife.com
Web:
www.act-tenerife.com
Electrician Mechanics
Construction
Furniture New Bed Bases & Mattresses for sale at Tenerife Auction Rooms, Las Chafiras. Excellent Quality, Low Prices, Next Day Delivery. Call 609 303 634
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Service Point
10th April - 16th April 2015
Patio Doors & Windows
Plumbing (cont.)
Boiler King: All plumbing works undertaken including boiler replacements, drain clearance, swimming pool pump repair & maintenance. Tel: 680 278 579
51 CW
security (cont.)
Tiling
Pool tables
Translation
Reflexology
TENERIFE TRANSLATION SERVICES: Legally registered with over 25 years experience. Official, Medical, Notary, Wills, Utilities, Probate, Pensions, car paperwork and much more. Professionalism and confidentiality guaranteed. Transport available. Call Tracey on 666 857 991 or email on info@tenerifetranslationservices.com
TV and Satellite Menny Fix, Satellite TV Tel 922 792 116 Avnd; Antonio Dominguez 18, Edif: MarOLa Local 2, Los Cristianos. EST 1994, Repairs, Maintenance and Sales.
Removals UNIVERSAL EXPORTS S.L. PROFESSIONAL REMOVALS TO AND FROM THE U.K. Email: info@removals-tenerife.com Transport Licence: No. 11572932 C.I.F. No. B38820395 Tel: 922 720 711
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CW 52
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Sport
10th April - 16th April 2015
A Real reffing mistake CD Tenerife 1 Real Zaragoza 1
By Roscoe IT’S a fair to say that Juan Lopez will not be getting a Christmas card from CD Tenerife this year. The card-happy referee had a shocker at the Heliodoro.
And you just know the whistle-blower was poor when both sides moan loudly. He showed eight yellow cards, two reds and his dozy assistant somehow managed to forget the first rule of being offside as another poor decision cost Tenerife a win they just about deserved. Tenerife took the lead on 16 minutes through a rare Aitor Sanz effort, although Maxi Perez tried his best to claim it. Television replays showed the ball just about touched Perez’s Sideshow Bob hair, but it would have been cruel to take the goal away from Sanz. It was a deserved opener for Raul Agne’s men. He has crafted a system and a line-up that works. Everyone knows his job and right now, CDT are a match for anyone. At half-time they were comfortable, but they hadn’t reckoned on Snr Lopez. Every schoolboy gets taught the offside rule. It has been tweaked over the years, but Ladies here is the basic rule: when a ball is moved forward, there has to be two players of the opposition closer to the goal-line than the furthest forward “in play” attacker. What most people forget, like the linesman and Snr Lopez, is the two-player bit. Ninetynine times out of 100, it’s the last defender and the goalkeeper. But this was the one time the keeper was not in play and Jesus Vallejo was two yards offside. Two yards in front of the second Tenerife defender. It was a poor poor decision. One that should make the officials wince when they
watch it back on TV. It was the latest example of Tenerife having all the poor luck recently. Despite this, the point does keep the unbeaten run going and at eight games, that is a remarkable achievement. That said, it’s bangin-form Alaves this weekend, and Tenerife will be missing some key players. Vitolo is a top bloke. A true Tenerife man. He bleeds white and blue. He also has an annoying habit of losing his cool. He was shown a second yellow in the tunnel after the final whistle and will miss the Alaves match. He cornered the ref, clapped his hands sarcastically and said: “Always the same! It’s always the same, always the same!” Okay, I’ve removed the expletives, but you get the gist. It’s not just the Tenerife lads who feel the officials are biased to those on the mainland. Las Palmas have the same beef, but I’ve never seen it. It’s the local mentality for me, and this was one of the reasons for Vitolo’s stupidity. Of course, he is al-
lowed to be annoyed about it, but he had more than enough time to calm down, and he is hardly a wet-behindthe-ears kid. He is the senior pro, and he should act like it. Goal-scorer Aitor Sanz, who was much more grown-up, said: “We are on a good run at home and wanted to get another three points from this game. A referee’s error in the end cost us and it hurts. “But at the end we could have won and they are a team who kept going well under pressure and they deserve credit for that. “Today there was two more points out there, but we are still on a great run. We need to get 12 points for the first aim of 50 and we have 10 more games. We are happy. “In this league anything can happen, and you will see the underdogs start winning games against those above. If we do the same, we will zoom up that table. But we must reach 50 points soon.” Manager Agne was also philosophical, saying: “We have strived and tried. The team did well and I liked the way we played. We had lots
of ball and some good phases. We have done enough to win, but the key was getting that second goal. “When you attack and do not finish, they can counter. Zaragoza are very good technically, and it seemed to be a game of back and forth, frantic football. They defended very well, especially the Position
centre-backs. But their goal? “The goal of Zaragoza is a mistake. A serious technical error. Clear. Very clear. The referee ... it happened, it is what it is.” Elsewhere last weekend, as predicted, Real Betis are starting to pull away and Las Palmas continue to go backward. Betis didn’t Points
PLD
Won
1
Real Betis Balompié
62
32
18
2
Girona FC
59
32
3
Real Sporting
58
32
4
UD Las Palmas
56
5
Real Valladolid CF
6
get out of second gear as they eased past a doomed-looking Osasuna, while Las Palmas looked short of ideas as they crashed at Albacete. And the Llagostera bandwagon rolls on. They were too smart for Racing Santander and they are eyeing the play-offs. Unbelievable! Draw Lost
F A
8
6
49
27
17
8
7
44
28
14
16
2
42
24
32
15
11
6
52
36
54
32
16
6
10
48
29
Real Zaragoza
48
32
12
12
8
49
44
7
SD Ponferradina
46
32
12
10
10
47
43
8
UE Llagostera
46
32
13
7
12
32
32
9
Deportivo Alavés
44
32
11
11
10
40
35
44
32
11
11
10
41
41
10 CD Lugo 11 CD Leganés
43
32
12
7
13
34
30
12 CD Numancia
42
32
10
12
10
45
44
13 AD Alcorcón
41
32
10
11
11
38
43
14 CD Mirandés
40
32
10
10
12
28
35
15 CD Tenerife
38
32
9
11
12
30
36
16 RCD Mallorca
38
32
10
8
14
41
49
17 Albacete Balompié
38
32
10
8
14
38
47
18 RC Recreativo
32
32
7
11
14
29
41
19 Club Atlético Osasuna
32
32
8
8
16
29
48
20 FC Barcelona B
30
32
7
9
16
40
57
21 Real Racing Club
29
32
7
8
17
29
38
22 CE Sabadell FC
29
32
6
11
15
31
49
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53 CW
Sport
10th April - 16th April 2015
They keep on coming!
AFTER the toughest darts league season of all, we have finally completed our fixture calendar. And a quick glance at the tables reveals which teams have claimed their PresentationNight silverware.
Premier League title, deservedly it has to be said, and it’s a challenge for the rest of us to try to match them next term. The Pub take second, which, I believe, is their best finish, and Phoenix just nick third on a trebles-leg count-up. Despite being top of the pile for an eternity in Division One, Emerald Shamrocks were pipped to the title by Ourplace Playboys, whose form over the second half of the campaign was almost flawless. Third-placed Trap Door produced an amazing mid-season
Of course, there is a host of other awards to be given away on Friday (17th April), and they will be listed here next week. Bar 180 A retain their
PRemier division ResultS BAR 180 B PHOENIX BAR TARGET TITANS
1-7 5-3 0-8
BAR 180 A VIKINGS ENSECAN TARGET ARMY
season, and huge credit to The Palms, who gave it everything! And not forgetting Palms Sports Bar, who swiped the thirdplace pot from under the noses of Chipeque Chippers by beating them in the last round of fixtures. But, the darts keep on coming and, for a chance to play on stage during Presentation Night, the Memorial Trophy singles competition will be staged tonight (Friday) at the Nauta Bar venue in Guaza. This fund-raising event for charity is split, divisionally, and
run, and looked like winners at one point. But a late mini-slump sealed their fate. A right old ding-dong at the top of an extremely competitive Division 2 saw the title won in the last match - and almost the last dart! Congratulations to Waterfall Warriors, champions in their first
is for ladies only. And although very competitive, it provides a chance for players to unwind a bit, and enjoy plenty of banter. As mentioned before, the four finals from this competition will be played on the stage at Showtime during the end-of-season bonanza, which has become known as our legendary Presentation Night. Admittedly, there have been a few I don’t remember, I can tell you! But we welcome all players, family and friends alike to join us for an evening of fine wine, fine dining, great entertainment ... and
some darts thrown in for good measure. Not forgetting a mountain of trophies to be given out! Seats for the grand occasion are limited, so we must insist on bookings. Contact me, or Chris at Oasis Fm to confirm. On a personal note, I would like to thank fellow committee members Harry and Rob who have again been very supportive during a difficult period for this darts league. And, of course, many thanks to our sponsors and associates, Express Bar Deliveries and Oasis Fm.
division 1 ResultS
division 2 ResultS
CLOUSEAUS 4-4 TRAP DOOR EMERALD SHAMROCKS 2-6 GAFFERS A PAS O NADAS 7-1 NAUGHTY NAUTAS SUMMERLANDS 4-4 PICASSOS SUNDOWNERS 2-6 OURPLACE PLAYBOYS
MARILYNS 1-7 WATERFALL WARRIORS OURPLACE PLAYGIRLS 5-3 PHOENIX FLIGHTS PALMS SPORTS BAR 6-2 CHIPEQUE CHIPPERS SPEAR CHUCKERS 5-3 THE REBELS THE PALMS 6-2 BARRACUDA HUNTERS
PRemier division Table
division 1 Table
Table
P W D L F A +- PTS
Table
division 2 Table P W D L F A +- PTS
Table
P W D L F A +- PTS
1 BAR 180 A
24 20
3
1 153 39 114 153
1 OURPLACE PLAYBOYS 30 23
5
2 166 74
92
166
1 WATERFALL WARRIORS 27 18
6
3 140 76
64
140
2 THE PUB
24 17
3
4 132 60
72
132
2 EMERALD SHAMROCKS 30 20
5
5 157 83
74
157
2 THE PALMS
27 19
4
4 138 78
60
138
3 PHOENIX BAR
24 17
3
4 131 61
70
131
3 TRAP DOOR
30 21
4
5 154 86
68
154
3 PALMS SPORTS BAR
27 15
5
7 125 91
34
125
4 TARGET ARMY
24 15
6
3 131 61
70
131
4 GAFFERS A
30 16
5
9 127 113 14
127
4 CHIPEQUE CHIPPERS 27 16
4
7 124 92
32
124
5 VIKINGS ENSECAN
24 10
4 10 99
6
99
5 EMERALD LOUNGE
30 13
3 14 118 122 -4
118
5 THE REBELS
27 12
2 13 107 109 -2
107
93
6 TARGET TITANS
24
9
0 15 67 125 -58
67
6 SUMMERLANDS
30 10
7 13 116 124 -8
116
6 MARILYNS
27
9
2 16 104 112 -8
104
7 GAFFERS B
24
4
2 18 61 131 -70
61
7 CLOUSEAUS
30 10
6 14 107 133 -26
107
7 PHOENIX FLIGHTS
27 10
6 11 104 112 -8
104
8 BAR 180 B
24
3
1 20 55 137 -82
55
8 NAUGHTY NAUTAS
30
9 14 106 134 -28
106
8 BARRACUDA HUNTERS 27
8
4 15 95 121 -26
95
9 BOOTHEN
24
2
0 22 35 157 -122
35
7
9 PAS O NADAS
30
5
4 21 94 146 -52
94
9 SPEAR CHUCKERS
7
1 19 84 132 -48
84
10 PICASSOS A
30
6
6 18 90 150 -60
90
10 OURPLACE PLAYGIRLS 27 3
27
2 22 59 157 -98
59
11 SUNDOWNERS
30
5
4 21 85 155 -70
85
Abbott poised to nick top spot THE games are being ticked off quite quickly as we roll towards the climax of this season’s Premier League and the Oasis Fm Fantasy Football League. The aim of the game now for our budding managers is consistency. You need to have a look at the teams around you and make sure you are matching them for points to maintain your position in the league. But there still might be time for a late surge.
The point-scoring team of the week was a real surprise, as three of the players were provided by Spurs, who drew 0-0 at Burnley. But they were defensive players, showing that Burnley had them on the back foot. The other surprise was that just one Arsenal player featured, considering their performance in hammering Liverpool. The rest of the players came from Everton, Man Utd, Chelsea, Leicester, QPR, Swan-
sea and Aston Villa. Gordon Wilson’s Coffee Shop Karma are still top of the league but the lead has been cut to just eight points by Nick Abbott, now nicely poised to nab top spot. Ray Malone is also still in there, but 36 points back. And unless the top two suffer spectacular collapses, he will probably have to console himself with third spot. Team of the week goes Chris Ayliffe and his Addickted team. The Charlton fan had a
superb week, thanks in part to the inspired decision to give Christian Benteke the captain’s armband. He bagged 46 points! The Oasis Fm Towers’ mini-battle is getting close! John Zammit earned 91 points but is still in the woodenspoon spot. Roscoe had a poor week with just 26 points and John has narrowed the gap to 44. The question is, are there enough games left to get still nearer? It’s as interesting at
the top because Chris Elkington has moved into top spot, but only by a point from Adi
Benson. Bragging rights are not decided yet, and this battle will run to the end of the season.
Fantasy Football League 1. Coffee shop karma
Gordon Wilson
53 1720
2. Boomtown Rabz
Nick Abbott
67 1712
3. inter malone
Ray Malone
55 1684
4. Toffees
Frank Devaney
74
5. Fc Twenty
Anthony Cracknell
83 1677
6. SpArTaNs
Jamie Palmer
87 1674
7. Crossfire Hurricanes
Warren Wilson
47 1673
8. Dan United
Dan Lawton
60 1670
1681
9. Kingsmead Krunchers Stephen Snook
63 1662
10. Harri’s thunderstars
71 1656
Harri Lobban
CW 54
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Sport
10th April - 16th April 2015
Cup Semi is real
IT was cup week again, with the semi-finals of the Tenerife Pool Tables Cup and Tenerife Pool Tables Plate taking place. The four matches were held in neutral venues, so before we get down to business, a big thankyou for their hospitality to The Terrace Bar on Amarilla Golf, Dreamers in Los Cristianos, The Treehouse in Chayofa and Hoppy’s Bar in Las Americas In the Cup, the first semi was an absolute classic, played out between Gaffers A and Phoenix Potters. Gaffers are unbeaten this season, so it looked a difficult task for the Potters to progress. And with Gaffers taking a 3-1 lead, things looked ominous. However, the old boys got the score back to 3-3 and then Eric played the game of his life to beat Gaffers captain Neil to take a 4-3 lead. The next game went Gaffers’ way and Ash then picked up the next frame after Paul rattled what looked like a straightforward red: 5-4 to Gaffers and game on” More excitement followed as Les beat Kev to make it 5-5. In the next frame, Lee fluffed his lines on a yellow and Potters’ Gary potted his final red to leave a straight black. Cool as a cucumber he rolled it in, only for the white to drop into the middle bag! It’s heartbreak for the Potters as Gaffers go 6-5 up, so it’s Eric versus Neil again,. If Eric can emulate his earlier game it will be tie-break time. Shots are being traded as Eric looks to get a foot-hold, and he puts himself in a good position. But towards the end of the frame, he gives away a couple of fouls and, despite having a shot on the black, Neil emerges triumphant as Gaffers book their Final place. But they really
were made to fight all the way after a fantastic Potters’ performance. In the second Cup semi, The Phoenix were taking on Waterfall Jokers in a First Division against Second Division clash. Although this Phoenix team are brand-new, captain Harry led his previous Phoenix teams to the last two Cup Finals and was looking for his third consecutive appearance. The Waterfall boys knew they were in for a tough match but were left ruing missed pots. The Phoenix settled well and took the early frames, although the Jokers had chances in every games only for nerves to get the better of them. They were playing well but not taking the important balls, and in this league your opposition is always going to punish you when this happens. The Phoenix never took their foot off the gas and before they knew it, the shell-shocked Jokers were 7-1 down and it was game over as The Phoenix took their place in the Final against Gaffers A. The final score was 8-4 as the Jokers made the scoreline a little more respectable. In the Plate semi-final, Second Division Inn The Pink B faced a difficult task against Tenerife Hammers A, last season’s First Division champions and Cupholders. Pink B have been going well in their division, and it was a great chance for them to evaluate their game against a better team. But they made a nervy start and Hammers were soon 4-0 up, with Del producing a seven ball against Callum. On to the next four frames and first up was Callum against Del again. But this time the tables were turned and Callum sev-
division 1 ResultS
division 2 ResultS
Waterfall Rebels
8-4
The Peacocks
division 1 Table
James Place Picasso’s A The Crown
7 - 5 Sporting Jester A 6-6 Treehouse B 9 - 3 Sporting Jester B
division 2 Table
Table
P W D L F A +- PTS
Table
P
1 Tenerife Hammers A
23 18
4
1 184 92
1 Sporting Jester A
21 18
2
1 185
2 Gaffers A
21 18
3
0 178 74 104 57
2 Bluebell A
22 15
2
5 152 112 40 47
3 Inn The Pink A
23 12
3
8 147 129 18
39
3 Waterfall Jokers
19 12
3
4 134
94
40 39
4 Treehouse A
24 11
4
9 150 138 12
37
4 Inn The Pink B
19 10
8
1 135
93
42 38
5 The Phoenix
21 10
4
7 132 120 12
34
5 James Place
20 11
3
6 143
97
46 36
6 Palms Bar A
22
9
5
8 137 127 10
32
6 Gaffers B
19 11
3
5 134
94
40 36
7 Waterfall Rebels
22
9
5
8 130 134
-4
32
7 Picasso’s A
20
8
4
8 121 119
2 28
8 Dreamers A
22
8
5
9 132 132
0
29
8 Hoppys Bar
21
8
2
11 127 125
2 26
9 Phoenix Potters
21
9
1
11 125 127 -2
28
9 Tenerife Pool Tables
20
7
2
11 105 135 -30 23
10 Palms Bar B
22
8
4
10 122 142 -20 28
10 Sporting Jester B
20
7
0
13 101 139 -38 21
92
58
W D L
F A
+- PTS
67 118 56
11 Terrace Bar B
22
7
4
11 114 150 -36 25
11 Next Door
20
6
1
13 113 127 -14 19
12 Exiles B
22
5
5
12 114 150 -36 20
12 Dreamers B
19
3
2
14 89
139 -50 11
13 Terrace Bar A
24
5
3
16 119 169 -50 18
13 The Crown
19
3
2
14 41
187 -146 11
14 The Peacocks
22
3
7
12 114 150 -36 16
14 Treehouse B
21
2
4
15 100 152 -52 10
15 Tenerife Hammers C 21
4
3
14 94 158 -64 15
CUP AND PLATE RESULTS Tenerife Pool Tables Cup semi final The Phoenix 8-4 Waterfall Jokers at Terrace Bar Gaffers A 7-5 Phoenix Potters at Treehouse
Tenerife Pool Tables Plate semi final Inn The Pink B 5-7 Tenerife Hammers A at Dreamers Next Door 4-8 Gaffers B at Hoppys
en-balled Del. Lee then beat Wagsy to make it 4-2 and Pink B were on the up. Not for long, though, as Wez beat Tez. Pink B were not done, though, as Steve beat Jambo to make it 5-3. Callum returned to the table to face Jambo as the Hammers went for the win. Callum, buoyed by his earlier, took Jambo’s scalp to make it 5-4 and Hammers were starting to sweat. But they are well-versed in games like this, and Wez took the next frame to guarantee at least a tie-break. Del then beat Steve to take the winning frame for Hammers, the match eventually finishing 7-5. But Inn The Pink B can hold their heads high after putting in such a fine effort. The second semi was an all-Second Division
Tenerife Pool Tables Cup Final The Phoenix v Gaffers A Tenerife Pool Tables Plate Final Tenerife Hammers A v Gaffers B Both matches will be played at Terrace Bar on Tuesday June 2nd
contest between Next Door and Gaffers B, the latter being favourites based on league position and points. It was expected to be a tight contest as Craig and the lads from Next Door had been in decent form of late. But Gaffers B were up for this as they eyed a final spot. Some of the early frames were cagey affairs, but it was advantage Gaffers and, before anyone knew it, they were
7-0 up and it was game over as they progressed to a Final against Tenerife Hammers A. But Next Door did gain some consolation frames, the final score being 8-3. There was also some Direct Telecom League action this week with some catch-up matches. In Division One, Waterfall Rebels had a home game against The Peacocks and were the better side, winning 8-4 to leave The Peacocks in a relegation battle. In Division Two, the curse of the commentator kicked in as last week I tipped Sporting Jester A to go through the season unbeaten. They travelled to La
Caleta to play James Place, who are a very formidable team on their day. And so it proved as they emerged victorious with a great scalp, ending Sporting Jester A’s unbeaten run. Sorry guys, I will keep my predictions to myself in future! It wasn’t a good night for the Jesters as the B team took on The Crown in Valle San Lorenzo, picked up a couple of frames but were well beaten 9-3. At least they could console themselves with The Crown’s now-famous giant pizzas. In the remaining game, Picasso’s A played out a draw with Treehouse B.
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Premier Preview
10th April - 16th April 2015
55 CW
The Palace King - for once! By Adi Benson
WE were treated to another weekend of unexpected results. But when teams are batting relegation or fighting for the title, anything is possible and, with just seven games to go, there will be more twists and turns. And can I just point out to regular readers that I predicted a Crystal Palace win against City in last week’s column - sorry to gloat ,but it doesn’t happen very often!
Swansea v Everton After another good victory last week, it looks like Swansea will finish eighth. Considering it’s Garry Monk’s first managerial job, he should be applauded - and for me he should be in with a shout for manager of the season. They will go looking for early goals in this game and, with Gomis hitting form, they should get them. Everton will be buoyed after their home win against Southampton, but their season has not been what was expected. but I think that’s because they over-performed last season. They have some talented players and, in Lukaku, a fearsome striker. But it just hasn’t happened for them. Prediction: Home win
West Ham v Stoke After showing early promise, West Ham have really dipped in form and will be hurting after last week’s defeat at Leicester. Having chased a European place before Christmas, they will slip outside of the top 10 if Stoke beat them and Palace win again. I am sure Big Sam will have made the players aware of this, and they need to put in a performance. Stoke will be hungry for this one. They played well against Chelsea, maybe deserved a draw, and they know they can move above West Ham with a win. They are a difficult team to play against and don’t concede many goals, so West Ham have their work cut out. Prediction: Away win
West Brom v Leicester Considering how tight West Brom had been at the back since Tony Pulis took over, conceding four against QPR. will have rocked their confidence. They will look to bounce back. and a home tie against Leicester is a good way of doing it. Early pressure and an early goal is what they need. Leicester come into this game after a solid performance and a win against West Ham. They haven’t moved off bottom spot, though, and are still some distance from safety. But if they can get a run together now, they may avoid relegation. Prediction: Draw
Spurs v Aston Villa Spurs had a great chance to move above Liverpool into fifth place, but they put in a lacklustre performance against Burnley. Unless they up their levels, they could miss out on a Europa League place, and that could lead to offers coming in for Harry Kane. As was proved last week, if he has an off-day or is injured, the team struggle for goals. They need him to put his scoring boots on. Tim Sherwood, the former Tottenham stalwart, comes back to White Hart Lane as Villa manager with a point to prove. They are still in a relegation battle and need to start taking points after a disappointing defeat at Man Utd, They have the player to score goals, as we saw against QPR in midweek, and they need Benteke to maintain that fine form. Prediction: Away win
Sunderland v Crystal Palace Victory in the Tyneside derby has really boosted Sunderland’s chances of staying up, but they need to string results together if safety is to become a reality. The players showed genuine fighting qualities against Newcastle and now need to show the same in their remaining fixtures, It is tight at the bottom, but they have given themselves a chance. Palace will be sky-high after beating Man City and they now have a top-10 finish in their sights. They are just three points behind Stoke and West Ham and, with those two playing each other this week, a win here could move them up the table. Prediction: Away win
Southampton v Hull Southampton controlled last week’s match at Everton but still ended up losing as they couldn’t score goals. They also looked as though they had no Plan B. A win would have moved them into fifth and strengthened their claim on a Europa League spot. but it wasn’t to be. As my teacher used to say, must do better! Hull are in real danger at the bottom, just two points above safety with some horrific fixtures ahead. There are no ifs or buts, they need a win and three points. Anything less and they could find themselves in the bottom three. They are in deep trouble. Prediction: Home win
Burnley v Arsenal Burnley are certainly not going down without a fight, and I still believe they have a little more quality than some of the teams around them which will keep them up. They played well against Spurs and were unlucky not to win, but this will be a different game altogether and will really test them defensively. A draw would be a good result for them. Arsenal are playing extremely well. I can’t see them catching Chelsea, though, so they will want to hold on to the second spot they now occupy. They will have to be patient as Burnley will defend well - but one goal could lead to a cricket score. Prediction: Away win
QPR v Chelsea The Hoops pulled off a great victory over West Brom and backed it up at Villa Park. They should have won, but four points in two away games is a perfectly adequate return, and they will want to keep the run going in the London derby. I think we can now refer to Chelsea as champions as they are seven points clear with a game in hand. In recent weeks, they haven’t been convincing, but they have still picked results up - and that’s what matters. Loic Remy is doing well as Costa’s replacement and should make hay back at his old stomping ground. Prediction: Away win
Liverpool v Newcastle Fortunately for Liverpool, Spurs and Southampton both put in under-par performances, leaving the Reds still fifth, even after a mauling at Arsenal. Going into this game, they will know the result of the Manchester derby and, depending on the result, they will know a win here could move them to within four or five points of fourth spot. I have been saying for weeks that Newcastle are already on holiday. They know they are safe, as I think 35 points is the target this year, and their performances have shown it, especially against Sunderland. Only one team wanted to win that game - and it wasn’t Newcastle! Prediction: Home win
Man Utd v Man City Who would have thought that coming into this game, United would be above City in the table, especially given their sluggish start to the season. This derby game is now as big as it comes, not only in terms of bragging rights because United could move four points clear of their bitter rivals - and be looking at a top three finish! Wayne Rooney has a habit of scoring in this fixture, and a real captain’s performance is needed from him. City will be licking their wounds after the Palace defeat, and even they know they are out of the title race. But they will not want go out with a whimper - and they will certainly not want to finish below United. Game on! Prediction: Away win
CW 56
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