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the RUSSIANS aren’t coming Issue 917 28th August - 3rd September 2015

Inside this week...

ONE of the biggest myths in Tenerife has been busted this week - the so-called Russian Revolution - which will not please business and hotel owners. Continued on page 3


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Tenerife tourism booming as Russian Revolution collapses Continued from front. Over the last decade, they have been setting themselves up to cater for the boom from the flood of Russian tourists, but it seems that the market has already peaked. Official tourism figures for last year saw a remarkable decline in the number of Russians visiting Tenerife. And the numbers were even worse for the first six months of 2015. The economic and social crisis in the former Soviet Union has affected the whole of Spain’s tourist regions. According to official figures between January and June, 42,781 Russian tourists came to Tenerife, which was a decrease of 48% compared with the same period last year. This puts the Russian market at No.15 in the list of tourists from foreign countries arriving in Tenerife during that period. Britain, of course, is far and away the tops! By months, January brought together the largest number of visitors from Eastern European countries, with 10,636, followed by May and June, both with more than 8,000. In contrast, February and March, during which there were 5,000 fewer Russian visitors each month, represented declines of more than 50% against the match-

ing periods last year. The data is significant when measured against previous years. From 2010, the Russian market on the Island recorded a growth of around 30% in the four years. However, last year closed with a fall of 7%, against its 185,000 tourists in 2013. In these ‘boom’ years, the Russians stayed in the South of Tenerife, where 97% of Russians enjoyed their holidays. Despite that sharp decline in Russian figures, it is worth pointing out that they do spend well. The average Russian forks out about 20% higher than the average spend by foreign tourists. And 6.8% of revenues from tourism on the Island came from Russian visitors. The difficul-

ties facing the country, with devaluations of its currency, the decline in oil prices, the bankruptcy of tour operators, the crisis in Crimea, plus European sanctions resulting from the crisis or limitations on the travel of officials and military personnel, have in the last year been the main reasons for causing the market decline. And it’s not just Spain suffering from the Russian retreat. Last year in Turkey, two million Russians holidayed in the first seven months of the year. That figure has slumped to 1.4m and the August market is said to be a disaster for Turkey. Greece, France and Italy have also seen a massive reduc-

tion in the number of Russian visitors. But one country is smiling. Tourism in Georgia is up 12%, while Azerbaijan and Armenia have also seen a boom in Russian tourists. But though the Russians are staying away, the Americans are flocking to Spain. The number of visitors is up by around 10%, and the figure is more or less the same in the Canary Islands. And there was more good news this week, with some recordbreaking numbers for July. Official figures show that 39.8 million nights’ accommodation was used by tourists last month, which is a record. This is an impressive 5.9% increase on

the same month last year - and it’s not just overseas tourists boosting the figures. The domestic market, involving Spanishbased residents taking breaks in Spain, rose 7% year on year, while the number of nights booked by overseas tourists was up 5.3%. These excellent figures, especially from domestic trade, boosts the Spanish economy and goes some way to showing that Mariano Rajoy’s Government has its growth figures correct. The surge in tourism is also remarkable when you consider that the cost of staying in Spain has, year on year, jumped

8% on average. The weaker Euro has made Spain seem more value for money, although the actual cost of an overnight stay has increased throughout the country. The average cost of a room is now 87.80 euros. In July, occupancy in the Canary Islands was 81%, with Lanzarote leading the way on 90%, the highest in the whole of Spain. The archipelago still leads the way, welcoming a record number of foreign tourists in the first seven months of this year. Officially, 6,594,864 arrived between January and July, which beats last year’s 6,538,654. To put this in context, before last year the biggest number was 5,904.135 - and that was in 2001! With tourist spending levels at a record high 28.3 billion euros spent in the first six months of 2015 - record occupancy and an increase in the early-bird bookings for winter, there is no doubt that our tourism industry is booming. Tenerife continues to post record figures, and this winter should set new high marks, despite the lack of Russian tourists.


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Spain between The Rock - and another hard place

YET another rumpus has erupted between Spain and Gibraltar to go with recent, angry events between the warring factors.

The latest, according to Gibraltar authorities, involves Spanish Customs officials accused of firing shots and throwing bricks at a Gibral-

tarian pleasure boat, as tensions continue to escalate between the neighbouring nations. In what has been described as an “extremely serious escalation”, Gibraltar’s Chief Minister said four shots were fired at fishermen on Saturday while their boat was “well inside” the British territory’s waters. Fabian Picardo said the “illegal incursion” the third confrontation

Women still at risk from partners in the Canaries DOMESTIC violence remains a problem in the Canary Islands, even though official figures show a slight decline in the number of cases last year, compared with 2013. But the fact remains that the Canaries remains one of the regions with the most complaints, orders of protection and victims of male domestic violence. In fact, according to data published by the Ministry of Interior, the Integral Monitoring System in cases of Gender Violence (VioGén System) of the Ministry of State

Security, shows there are 4,140 active cases in the archipelago, of which 1,994 have “severe” risk. The Ministry states that an active case “is one that is the subject of police attention, being the established level of risk depending on the time and the circumstances that surround it. Police protection measures are increased in intensity depending on the level of risk increases”. According to the Viogén System in the Canary Islands, there has been a total of 27,771 recorded cases so far this year.

around The Rock in as many weeks - reflected “repeated Spanish violations of British-Gibraltar sovereignty”. Meanwhile, the Foreign Office has submitted a protest with the Spanish Government “at the very highest level” over the alleged incident. According to two fishermen, the drama broke out when Spanish vessel Aguila IV ordered the fishing boat to stop its engines. When the instruction was ignored, the vessel apparently circled the boat before officials attempted to get on board. The fishermen claim that shots were then fired into the sea near the boat, while bricks were also apparently thrown at the two men. Mr Picardo said the Government was “working closely” with the UK to ensure “necessary and appropriate action” was taken. A Foreign Office statement said officials were “extremely concerned. We have protested this incursion to the Spanish Government at a high level, and have also raised our extreme concern over the reported

interaction between the Spanish vessel and a Gibraltarian pleasure craft during the incursion. “We take seriously, any reports of attempts by Spanish law-enforcement agencies to interfere with vessels in British Gibraltar territorial waters and threaten or intimidate their crews. “We continue to work closely with HM Government of Gibraltar and the Royal Gibraltar Police (RGP) to establish the facts surrounding the incident.” A Gibraltar Government spokesman said the local men had since given statements to police and insisted they had not been acting illegally. “There is no suspicion that they were doing anything illegal,” the statement added. “They had all necessary fishing permits.” Mr Picardo said it was the third incident in-

volving a Spanish customs vessel - known as an SVA - in less than one month. He also said the “illegal incursion” reflected “repeated Spanish violations of British-Gibraltar sovereignty”. He added: “This illegal incursion by the SVA into British Gibraltar territorial waters represents an extremely serious escalation of the repeated Spanish violations of British-Gibraltar sovereignty. “There is no ‘law-enforcement’ excuse this time. The Spanish authorities have put the lives of innocent Gibraltarian civilians at risk. We take seriously any attempts by Spanish law enforcement agencies to interfere with vessels in British Gibraltar territorial waters.” He added that the SVA boat was in violation of treaties and the international law of the sea.

“Her Majesty’s Government of Gibraltar will not tolerate, under any circumstances, the intimidation or harassment of Gibraltar vessels in British Gibraltar territorial waters,” he stressed. “We are working closely together with the UK Government, so that necessary and appropriate action is taken to counter this unacceptable threat. “Proper co-operation remains our aim. The sooner the Spanish authorities adopt a similar co-operative posture, the better.’ Earlier this month, the UK Government accused Spain of “a clear violation of UK sovereignty” after complaining that boats and helicopters had been sent into British waters in Gibraltar. Ministers said repeated incursions were “unacceptable and unlawful under the international law” and pledged to raise the matter urgently with the Spanish. A row broke out recently after Spanish state vessels chasing suspected drug-smugglers made forays into waters around Gibraltar.

Spanish man hit by painful mosquito-connected disease THE first person to contract the chikungunya virus without travelling to an infected area, has prompted the European Centre for Disease Control to publish a Rapid Risk Assessment.

The 60-year-old Spanish man, who has not been named, “developed symptoms on 7th July while travelling in France,” said the ECDC in a statement. “He had no history of

travel outside the EU during the last three months and was most likely infected in the city of Gandía, Valencia community in Spain.”

It is the first time that chikungunya - a mosquito-borne viral disease - has been reported without travel to the affected area.

While the virus is rarely fatal, it can be severely debilitating, leaving those infected suffering with joint pain for years. The most common symptoms of the virus are fever and joint pain, while other symptoms may include headache, muscle pain, joint swelling or rash - similar to those experienced with dengue fever. The virus is carried by the tiger mosquito Aedes albopictus and the yellow fever mosquito Aedes aegypti. Outbreaks have occurred in countries in Africa, south-east Asia and the Indian subcon-

tinent. Cases have also been detected in Italy and France. The ECDC says: “The current world-wide epidemiological situation of chikungunya has resulted in an increased number of cases in Europe, mainly originating from the Americas.” The first case was discovered in the Americas in 2013 when the disease was detected in the Caribbean. The ECDC has advised travellers returning from infected areas to “seek medical care if presenting with symptoms consistent with chikungunya”.

There is no vaccine or medicine currently to prevent to treat the virus infection. The best way for travellers to protect themselves is by preventing mosquito bites. The ECDC advises travellers to “use insect repellent, wear long sleeves and trousers, and stay in places with air-conditioning, or those using window and door screens”. Tiger mosquitoes have been spotted in Paris this summer for the second year in a row, prompting anti-mosquito operations around the city.


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Judge Dread is on the warpath again THE innovative use of universal jurisdiction by controversial judge Baltasar Garzon has been put under fire by the Spanish Government.

Garzon, during his colourful career, has brought down governments, closed newspapers and ordered the arrests of dictators. Now, the former Spanish judge who redefined the boundaries of cross-border justice, has set his sights on widening the definition of international law to target corporations which carry out economic or environmental crimes. “Humanitarian and economic crises cause more deaths around the world than all of the genocides we have documented,” said Garzón, who made headlines around the world when he ordered the 1998 arrest of former Chilean dictator Augusto Pinochet in London. He and other leading activists, judges and academics from a dozen countries will come together next month at a conference in Buenos Aires to promote the idea that economic and environmental crimes be considered crimes against humanity, akin to torture or genocide. Actions that could be considered criminal, said Garzón, include those of the so-called vulture funds that undermine countries’ debt-restructuring, or companies which turn a blind eye to the abusive exploitation of natural resources such as coltan, used in mobile phones, digital cameras and computers. “These actions fit the definition of crimes against humanity because they affect certain sectors of the population and trample on human rights,” he said. And, referring to environmental crimes, he added: “We’re seeing how climate change is connected to natural disasters and famines.”

The recent Greece crisis yielded another example of what he saw as criminal behaviour. “While the Greeks were voting in the referendum, there was a massive exit of capital from the country, some two billion euros,” he pointed out. “It left the country on the brink of collapse and limited how much money citizens could withdraw each week,” said Garzón. But widening the application of international law could enable courts to enforce the return of this capital, or even embargo it. The mechanism for prosecution would be universal jurisdiction a provision in international law which allows judges to try cases of human-rights abuses committed in other countries. The doctrine would be particularly helpful in going after large corporations because it would allow the law to equally pursue perpetrators, regardless of where their headquarters are located. For much of the past two decades, Spanish judges were among the leaders of applying universal justice, relying on the doctrine to reach beyond Spanish borders and investigate serious human

rights abuses in Argentina, Rwanda and Guatemala. Last year, after a court in Spain ordered Interpol to issue arrest warrants for former Chinese leader Jiang Zemin and four other senior Chinese officials over alleged humanrights abuses in Tibet decades ago, the governing People’s party fast-tracked a reform to curb the use of universal jurisdiction in Spain. Critics accused the Spanish Government of prioritising trade relations with China over human rights. Garzón, whose judicial career in Spain ended in 2012 when he was convicted of illegally ordering the wire-tapping of conversations between defence lawyers and clients in a corruption case involving the People’s Party, warned that the changes were part of a wider step backwards on human rights in Spain. “This latest initiative will probably face serious political obstacles as well,” said Garzón. “The problems will come when this initiative affects powerful countries, such as the United States, China or Israel,” he said. “But little by little, the path will be paved.”

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Suspected IS recruiters held FOURTEEN people have been arrested in Spain and Morocco in a joint operation targeting suspected recruiters for the socalled Islamic State (IS) group. One arrest was made near Madrid, and the others in various Moroccan cities. Those detained are suspected of involvement in a network to send fighters to areas of Syria and Iraq under IS control. Last Friday, a Moroccan who had lived in Spain was arrested following a foiled attack on a high-speed French train. Ayoub El-Khazzani, a 25-year-old originally from Tetouan in northern Morocco, arrived in Spain in 2007 and lived there for seven years - in Madrid and Algeci-

ras - before moving to France. He was suspected of having had contact with radical Islamists and had been listed as “potentially dangerous” by Spanish authorities. They flagged this up to French counterparts in February 2014. Spanish counterterrorism sources, quoted on Monday by Spain’s Cadena Ser radio network, said that some 800 people, with radical Islamist profiles, were in Europe and ready to strike, having returned from Syria and Iraq. The latest Spanish arrest took place in San Martin de la Vega, close to Madrid, and the others were in the Moroccan cities of Fez, Casablanca, Nador, al-Hoceima and Driouech.

The Spanish Interior Ministry said the operation was ongoing, without giving specific details. In Madrid, the BBC’s Tom Burridge says that in June, Spain raised the terrorism threat level from three to four out of a possible five, increasing the number of armed police at sensitive sites across the country. Level four means the intelligence services believe there is a high risk of a terror attack happening, he stresses. Both Spain and Morocco have arrested dozens of suspected radical Islamists in recent years. But Islamic State fighters have over-run large parts of Syria and Iraq since launching an offensive in June 2014 in western Iraq.


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29 are drowned in Canaries this year INCLUDED in the 235 drownings in Spanish waters so far this year were 29 in the Canary Islands, with July the worst month overall so far.

It accounted for 85 victims, reports the Royal Spanish Federation of Lifesavers, whose co-ordinator for Prevention and Safety, Ana Dominguez Pachón, said: “These figures show that we need to do more to save lives.” Thirty people drowned in the first fortnight of August, while February totalled the lowest figure of eight deaths, followed by January, 14; April, 16; March 20; May 23 and June, 29. Of those killed, 71% were Spanish people (167), followed by other European citizens (15%, with 37 victims). More than half the drownings occurred on beaches (135), while 40 people died in a pool and another 22 in rivers. In other areas containing water, another 38 people perished. Many of these trag-

edies occurred in areas where there was no monitoring services or lifeguards at the time of the incidents. People most affected were those over 45, who account for almost 60% of drownings. Spain’s Health Ministry has reiterated its series of recommendations to swimmers to avoid tragedies at the beach, river, or in the swimming pool. *Choose safe places to bathe which are supervised by lifeguards *Keep an eye on children at all times when they are in the water or near it *Do not swim unaccompanied *If you do not know how to swim, or are not a strong swimmer, wear a life vest *Always follow the warnings indicated by the three-flag system (green, yellow, red) *Drinking alcohol before bathing reduces the ability to react to danger, and could lead to unsafe behaviour *Swimming at night is very dangerous *Leave the water as quickly as possible if you begin to feel tired or cold *Test the temperature before entering the water

Supermarkets facing huge orange squeeze NO rain in Spain has led to fears that High Street supermarkets in Britain face short supplies of fresh oranges and juice, which will make things tough on smaller companies.

Data from commodity analysts Mintec shows that EU orange prices have risen 13%, yearon-year, to reach an 18-month high of £70 (98 euros) at the end of July. An early-season lack of rainfall, with recordbreaking temperatures in June and July across Europe including Spain’s main orangeproducing region of Valencia - have reduced the yield of fruit. The research says that lower production

expected for the coming November harvest - forecast to fall 14% to 5.7 million tonnes, compared with the previous season - is the main reason for pessimism. Mintec analyst Lili Gonzalez told trade magazine The Grocer: “Juice processors will find it hard to secure fresh fruit for production. As a result, orangejuice production in the EU is forecast to be 18% down from last season, at 91,000 tonnes.” The magazine says that the continuing strength of the Pound against the Euro is shielding most UK producers from the price hikes already seen, with potential rises to come. But experts warn that smaller companies relying on whole oranges to produce freshlysqueezed products could still be hit severely.

A second place in the sun for British police BENIDORM authorities have taken a leaf out of Magaluf’s book by announcing the employment of British policemen to patrol the Spanish party hot-spot.

It forms part of a pioneering exchange agreement, say authorities in the famous Costa Blanca resort. The announcement follows a controversial pilot scheme, in which two British officers patrolled Majorca and Ibiza. West Midlands Police pair Sgt Brett Williams and Pc Martina Anderson are about to leave the rowdy resort of San Antonio following their week in boiling-hot Magaluf - in full uniform! The experiment was criticised after it emerged that they were working days only and not nights, when most of the two resorts’ problems occur with overzealous Brit tourists. But Spanish Government delegate Juan Carlos Moragues, who is really up for the scheme, expects officers to be installed in the Beniform holiday hotspot “next summer or before”.

They will patrol alongside Spanish police, or help man a foreign tourists’ attention centre, known locally as a SATE. Moragues said: “The idea is that when British holiday-makers see a bobby in the SATE, or patrolling the streets or the beach, they feel at home. “Initially the number of officers will be small, but their numbers will be increased afterwards.” He also said that a formal agreement guaranteeing their presence in Benidorm had yet to be signed. But the idea is that they will become a ‘permanent’ fixture in the city. Moragues, the Spanish government’s representative in the Valencian Community which includes the provinces of Castellon, Valencia and Alicante, made his surprise announcement during a visit to Benidorm’s SATE. He also revealed the agreement would be part of an exchange which would involve Spanish police travelling to Britain. Having moved on to Ibiza from Benidorm, the Britcops helped the Guardia Civil arrest a man who had, allegedly, assaulted his partner in broad daylight on a busy

San Antonio street. He is thought to have been released without charge after appearing in court when she refused to press charges. Days earlier, they ordered British tourists off Endosperm’s beach after a fish bit a 10-yearold boy on the hip. Sunbathers fled the water in panic, fearing a shark was on the loose. But local authorities said they thought it was a barracuda. Neither the Spanish police travelling to Britain, nor the British police in Spain, are expected to have powers of arrest. Authorities say they see their job as helping their compatriots - and dissuading them from breaking the rules with their presence. Long popular with British tourists, the Benidorm resort has struggled to deal with a recent increase in drunken and violent behaviour. And a former policeman, who spent the night in the resort, questioned whether the British officers could be effective there, especially with no powers of arrest. Mark Williams-Thomas believes that only a zero tolerance policy from the resort’s bars, and a more visible Spanish

police presence on the streets, will quell disorderly behaviour. And he is worried about the safety of female revellers. He warned on TV’s This Morning programme that “having no power” means British police can do little to arrest the drunken antics. “I spent a night there, and got to bed about three o’clock, and it was a really different atmosphere,” he told the ITV programme. “I was worried for the young women there, and there were very few police around. “British police have said they are sending two officers out, but we must remember that they have no power out here, so it’s down to the Spanish police.’ Mr William-Thomas claimed that rather than expect security forces to be the solution to the escalating problems, the bars and clubs must start taking responsibility by limiting how much alcohol they can sell. While acknowledging that the new rules on shops limiting alcohol sales, and tougher restrictions on streetdrinking, were positive steps, he believes it’s now up to the bars themselves to implement a “zero tolerance” policy.


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All airshow crash victims believed to have been discovered

Shoreham tragedy prolonged as the Police make sure

The editor says...

Email: editor@canarianweekly.com

The time to right a wrong I THINK everybody in the world has been cheering on Usain Bolt this week, drug cheat Justin Gatlin’s mates apart. Like F1, athletics is, for me, a sorry sport.

I honestly have no idea who is juiced up and who is clean. The sport is finished if Bolt ever fails a test. It was, excuse the pun, a shot in the arm to see him beat Gatlin twice. One for the good guys. Talking of which, hats-off to long-jumper Greg Rutherford. Here is a bloke who has won gold at the European championships, Commonwealth and Olympic Games and has now been crowned world champion. Yet he could still walk down the street unrecognised. I guess he doesn’t have the “look” to be a big star. He deserves all the credit in the world for what he has done and, surely, he will receive a knighthood. Why not? We live in a world where it is Sir Bradley Wiggins. In fact Wiggins, knighted after winning the Tour de

France once, should be joined in the “Swordon-the-shoulder” club by Chris Froome who has won the Tour twice. If it’s Dame Kelly Holmes, then I would suggest Jessica Ennis-Hill is worthy of the same title. Recently, the honours system has been ridiculed, and there is even a gag about getting one in a box of Frosties. The awarding of an MBE to all England’s Ashes-winning squad a few years ago was a particular low. If Henry Cooper can get knighted, then it’s time for Joe Calzaghe and London-born Lennox Lewis to get the same treatment. In horse-racing, for Sir Mark Prescott read John Gosden and in football, Sir Geoff Hurst - David Beckham? And it’s not just the dishing out of Sirs. Can somebody tell me why Tenerife regular John Lowe hasn’t been honoured? Here is a threetime world champion who raises tens of thousands of pounds for charity every year. If Alan Knight, Luke Donald and Jo Pavey can be honoured with an MBE, then it must also be time for Lowey.

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POLICE have officially named five of the 11 people who died during Saturday’s Shoreham Airshow disaster in West Sussex when a Hawker Hunter jet dived on to the A27 road, ploughing into a line of vehicles.

Sussex police revised their original estimate of 20 victims to say it was “increasingly likely” that the death toll from the A27 crash would remain at 11. And they believe they have now put names to all the victims. Chief Constable Giles York spoke of a “devastating four or five days”, and added: “The stage we’re at now is that we most likely think we’ve identified 11 people who have died at the scene. “We need to give a human face to the families involved in this, and be really honest with them, saying, ‘We think your loved one may well be in one of those vehicles at the scene’.” Four victims were named at first: weddingcar driver Maurice Abrahams, 76; Worthing United footballers and best pals Matthew Grimstone and Jacob Schilt, both 23, and personal trainer Matt Jones, 24. And yesterday (Thursday), grandfather Mark Reeves, a motorbike rider from Seaford, was added to the death toll. Fears have been raised over Daniele Polito, a father from Worthing who was travelling in the same car as Mr Jones when the plane crashed. Motorcyclist Mark

Trussler, from Worthing, is also missing. His fiancee, Giovanna Chirico, wrote on Facebook: “Just want u bk home - feeling heartbroken. Assistant Chief Constable Steve Barry said on Tuesday: “The aircraft has now been removed from the site, and I’m relieved to say that no further victims were found as a result of our examination of that particular scene. “We have to urge some caution, though, because we haven’t completed our full forensic examination of the crash, which is very extensive.” It is thought that the jet’s seats were in place within the wreckage, which suggests that pilot Andy Hill - fighting for his life in a medically-induced coma after being hauled from the wreckage - may not have been able to eject before impact. Aviation expert Julian Bray believes that a catastrophic engine failure could have sparked the disaster. New footage of the jet halfway through its loopthe-loop manoeuvre appears to show an orange

flash behind the plane. A “flame-out”, which causes the engine to stall, could explain why the vintage plane, flown by an experienced pilot, crashed. Mr Bray, an airline operations’ specialist, was almost certain the flash was a flame or flare from the aircraft. “Something was definitely not right,” he said. “This particular aircraft does not have an after-burner on it so, usually, you don’t see any form of orange flare at the back. “It’s very brief, but that would be enough to cut the jet completely enough to throw the aircraft out of alignment.” He added: “The pilot would be using all his skill, essentially flying a dead-stick jet aircraft. Essentially, he would have had no overall control.” The remains of the plane are now being forensically examined, and the Air Accidents Investigation Branch (AAIB) is expected to issue an interim report within days. But the stricken plane, reportedly, had no black box recorder. Meanwhile, a Facebook

post by a firefighter who attended after the Hawker Hunter jet ploughed into the road has been widely circulated. John Murphy wrote: “What a truly tragic weekend this has been, I can’t begin to explain the devastating events that myself and my colleagues witnessed first hand at the airshow yesterday. “We were providing fire cover and were in position, just 100 metres from the crash scene when it happened. “We were first in attendance, but no amount of training, experience or advice could prepare us for what we were about to deal with.” Civil Aviation Authority has said “significant” restrictions on UK air shows are now being brought in, amid calls for changes following the crash. Displays by vintage jets over land will be limited to fly-pasts, which means high-energy acrobatics are banned. An appeal has been put out for members of the public who may have photographed the disaster to come forward.

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THIS year’s UK winner of the James Dyson Award is a prototype, 3D-printed robotic hand which, insists its creator, can be made faster and cheaper than current alternatives.

And Joel Gibbard, the Bristol-raised inventor of the Open Bionics project, believes he can 3D-scan an amputee and build him/her a customfitted socket and hand in under two days. Typically, it takes weeks or months to obtain existing products. But Mr Gibbard, who began work on the Open Bionics robotic hand in his bedroom, aims to start selling the prosthetics next year. “We have a device at the lower-end of the pricing scale and the upper end of functionality,” he told the BBC. “At the same time, it is very lightweight and can be customised for each person.” He added: “The hand is basically a skeleton with a ‘skin’ on top, so we can do different things to the skin. We can put patterns on it, and we can change the styling and design. There’s quite a lot of flexibility there.” There are an estimated 11 million-plus hand amputees worldwide, and the 25-year-old inventor intends to charge customers £2,000 for the device, including the cost of a fitting. Although prosthetic arms fitted with hooks can be bought for a similar price, those with controllable fingers are usually sold for between £20,000 and £60,000. That cost can sometimes be prohibitive for children, who usually need to change their prosthetic once or twice a year to take account of their growth. The Open Bionics’ hand relies on myoelectric signals, meaning it detects muscle movements, via sensors stuck to the owner’s skin, and uses them to control its grip. A single flex of the wearer’s muscles opens and closes the fingers, while a double flex changes the shape to form a pinch grip. Although the user cannot feel what the fingers are touching, sensors built into the digits can

28th August - 3rd September 2015

You have to hand it to genius Joel

tell when they come into contact with an object to limit the pressure exerted. This means owners can pick up objects as fragile as an egg without crushing them. But Mr Gibbard acknowledges there are still some limitations to his design. “We’re using lower-cost motors than they have in highend devices, so the overall strength is lower,” he said. “So, we are testing it with users and household objects and trying to come to a compromise that means it is very affordable - and still has enough power to do most of the stuff people want.” The project uses a 3D printer to construct the four separate parts from which its hands are made. The UK engineering prize includes a £2,220 reward and the chance to compete for an international title worth £28,600. Of more value, though, is that it will also help generate wider recognition for the project. Miss Barbara Jemec, founding chair of the British Foundation for International Reconstructive Surgery and Training (BFirst), said on learning of the prize: “Joel Gibbard is to be congratulated in advancing the availability of functioning prosthetic devices at affordable

prices. “Amputees, especially in developing countries such as Sierra Leone, where the civil war left many upper-limb amputees, need to have access to affordable and durable prosthetics that work. “A working hand can make all the difference between hunger and being able to work and take care of yourself and your family.” She added: “I shall be following the development with interest.” Open Bionics started

as a bedroom-based, crowd-funding project in 2013, which was supported by Bristol Robotics Laboratory. Since then, the design has has had 10 revisions with the number of separate parts radically reduced. Mr Gibbard says he can now size up a user in a matter of minutes, using a tablet equipped with a special sensor. He can also 3D-print the parts in about 40 hours, and finally fit them together in a further two hours. “The original design

was primarily made of different plastic parts that were screwed and bolted together, along with off-the-shelf components,” he recalled. “It took a very long time to build, and because it was all made of plastic, it was subject to a lot of weak points where it could break. “But the new design is made of thermoplastic elastomer, which is basically a flexible rubbery plastic. “So we’re able to print something in far fewer

pieces and then have flexible joints. That means it’s much more robust to impact forces, and it requires much less assembly, so there are savings in cost, time and improvements in performance.” While the current design supports patients whose limb loss is limited to their forearms only, the ultimate goal is also to help those with aboveelbow amputations. The roboticist is currently based in Los Angeles, where his work is being supported by Walt Disney’s Techstars Accelerator mentorship and investment programme. Although Mr Gibbard intends to start a business by selling custommade robotic hands in the second half of 2016, the project is also “open source”, which means people can share and use its designs without charge, so long as they, in turn, share any improvements they make. This is not the first time a James Dyson Award has gone to a robotic appendage. In 2013, the University of Pennsylvania’s Titan Arm - an exoskeleton for one arm, designed to help people with back injuries - won the top prize.

Afghan departure for Spanish troops SPAIN’S 420 troops are scheduled to return home from Herat, in eastern Afghanistan, before 31st October.

And once their withdrawal is complete, the only remaining Spanish presence in the country - after nearly 14 years - will be the 20 officials based at NATO general headquarters in Kabul, who will remain until the end of the year.

It will be quite a contrast to when Spain had over 1,500 military personnel stationed in Afghanistan at one stage. The Spanish contingent forms part of Operation Resolute Support, which replaced the former International Security Assistance Force (ISAF) combat mission, and provides assistance and advice to the Afghan authorities. The withdrawal from Herat, where Spanish forces first arrived in

2005 and assumed control immediately, will involve a complex logistical operation. But it will not be quite as complicated as the one carried out two years ago when the troops left Badghis province, handing over control to the Afghan army. They took charge of the provincial reconstruction team in Kabul’s Qala-i-Naw, ultimately handing the area over to Afghan authorities in September 2013. More than 18,000

Spanish troops have passed through the country since the first 350 soldiers arrived in Kabul in January 2002, four months after the 11th September attacks in New York and Washington. Ninety-nine members of Spain’s armed forces, and two interpreters working for them, have died in Afghanistan since the start of the mission. And, in total, the deployment has cost the Spanish Government around 3.7 billion euros.


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News

28th August - 3rd September 2015

Not even a close call

AROUND 10% of Canarian are addicted to their mobile devices, and 33% check their phones over 10 times an hour, according to an analysis by Rastreator.com on the use of mobile phones.

The Canarians use mobile phones an average of 3.4 hours a day, and women and young people under 24 are the most active users. In addition, 63.4% recognise they look at the mobile with regularity when they are at work

- and a worrying 9.7% while driving. In recent years, mobile telephony has experienced a boom, and 96.4% of Spanish households have a mobile device. In fact, Spain is also the European country leader in smartphone usage and fourth worldwide, behind Singapore, South Korea and Norway only. The survey shows that more than half the population (51%) are actively using the mobile over three hours a day. Users who have a more active profile are young people between 18 and 24, where the average is 5.5 hours per day, and women, with an average of 4.2 (as opposed to the

3.5 of the men). Extremadura (4.5 hours), Madrid (4,4) and the Basque Country (4,3) are where inhabitants spend more time connected to their mobile device, while Galicia (2,9), Navarra (2,9) and Asturias (2,8), are the least. This dependence has grown so much that, in some cases, it has become a disorder. Nomofobia is the uncontrollable fear (or anxiety) of leaving home without a mobile phone. And 77% of Spaniards who own a smart phone suffer nomofobia. Not surprising, then, that Spain has the highest teenage Internet addiction in Europe.

In-debt son who tried a fake kidnap on parents A MAN of 20, trying to rip off his parents for so-called ransom money, faked his own kidnapping in Cartagena, south-east Spain. The unidentified man reportedly went missing and contacted his mum and dad through an accomplice, who pretended to be his kidnapper. He actually ran a poker hall, where the man had accumulated debt.

The accomplice made threatening calls to the parents, allegedly saying that he would “chop off” their son’s legs and kill him unless a ransom money was paid for his safe release, reported The Local. When the man’s father called the local police and an investigation was initiated, the spn returned home unhurt, which sparked suspicion.

The “kidnapper” also revealed a lot of knowledge about the family’s properties during his calls, which added to police suspicions that it was a staged kidnapping. Police investigations next led to the son confessing to staging his own kidnapping. Along with his accomplice, he remains under arrest awaiting charges.

Woman crashes plane after pilot’s black-out A WOMAN forced to take the controls when the pilot lost consciousness, was seriously injured in an ultralight aircraft crash in Spain.

Officials said the woman,who had no flight experience, suffered burns and multiple contusions, while the pilot died. But the emergency services were unclear whether his death happened before or after the plane crashed on Sunday near Seville airport in south-western Spain. “He died, possibly before the accident, during the flight,” said a

spokesman. Spanish media reported that the man and woman were married. “The woman kept flying - she did not know how to fly - so they guided her from the control tower to see if she could control the plane until landing it at the airport.” Emergency services also dispatched a helicopter and a plane to guide the light plane down. According to a recording of their exchange, released by the online edition of local daily newspaper Diario de Sevilla, an air-traffic controller can be heard telling the woman: “The plane can fly without any problem. Don’t worry, the plane is not going to crash.”

He added, before asking her for the plane’s altitude: “Don’t worry, you are going to land without any problem.” The plane crashed 1.8 miles (3km) short of the beginning of the Seville airport runway during the attempted landing, according to Spain’s airport authority AENA. The airport stayed closed for nearly two hours because of the crash, forcing four flights to be diverted to the nearby city of Jerez de la Frontera. The ultralight aircraft, which had taken off from the city of Trebujena, was scheduled to have landed in Coria del Rio, a small town near Seville.

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Dead son’s dad lifted by Barrymore action MICHAEL Barrymore’s decision to sue the police has been welcomed by the father of a man who died at the former TV presenter’s home 14 years ago.

Stuart Lubbock, 31, who had met Mr Barrymore at a nearby nightclub in Harlow, was found dead in the swimming pool at the star’s home in Roydon, Essex. He has since moved. Mr Barrymore - once one of the most popular funny-men on TV - who was questioned but not charged, is taking action against Essex Police over damage to his reputation and career. But Mr Lubbock’s father, Terry, sees the legal action as a “gigantic opportunity” to expose

the truth. He has campaigned vigorously to discover how his son died - and has had six of 36 complaints and allegations upheld by an Independent Police Complaints Commission (IPCC) inquiry. Post-mortem tests found that Stuart Lubbock had suffered severe internal injuries, indicating sexual assault, and his bloodstream contained ecstasy, cocaine and alcohol. Essex Police said at the time that they were

committed to establishing how Mr Lubbock died, and how he received his injuries. But no one has ever been charged over his death. Mr Lubbock told the BBC: “I do feel that it’s my chance now to speak out and say the whole thing was covered up ... or the police didn’t do their job properly at the start.” Essex Police said: “The IPCC considered the investigation generally competent and wellconsidered. The report

Old drinkers told to put a cork in it

BOOZY over-65s could be heading for a whole heap of health trouble and their doctors can’t even help solve the problem. Researchers say that one in five pensioners who drink is consuming an “unsafe” level of alcohol. And experts warn that GPs are “less attuned” to drink problems among the elderly. Analysis of health records in London found that heavier drinkers tended to be male and relatively affluent. For older people, the report said, drinking more than the recommended limit carried an additional risk of confusion and falls. National guidelines advise no more than 14 units of alcohol a week for women and 21 units a week for men. Researchers used anonymised GP data from which the person cannot be identified by the recipient of the information - from 27,991 people over 65 and living in London. Of the 9,248 people who reported drink-

ing alcohol, 21% drank more than the safe recommended limits, as reported in the in BMJ Open report. Despite making up just under half of those included in the study, men accounted for 60% of the drinkers and 65% of the unsafe drinkers, according to the King’s College, London, team. Among the 5% drinking the most alcohol, men were consuming more than 49 units a week - more than a bottle of whisky - and women 23 units a week. Researchers also found that the problem of unsafe drinking was far more common among the white British and Irish population, than those from Caribbean - African or Asian ethnic groups. Study author Dr Mark Ashworth, a primary care researcher and GP, said the rates of unsafe drinking in elderly people were higher than those reported for the general population. He added: “Very few GPs are switched on to the idea that their

older patients could be drinking at these levels. We all look out for it in younger patients, but we are less attuned to it in the elderly. “What is uncertain from this study is whether people are drinking alone, or with friends at home, or down the pub.” He also said that alcohol-misuse services were not set up to deal with older patients. Prof Mark Bellis, alcohol spokesman for the Faculty of Public Health, said alcohol products should carry clear health warnings. “It’s easy for people to slip into a routine of drinking half-a-bottle of wine a night without knowing it increases their risks of health problems, such as cancer, and can take years off their life span,” he added. “Having this information is especially important for older drinkers, so that they can make informed decisions about their alcohol consumption at a time of life when risks of illhealth often increase.”

released in 2009 made a number of recommendations, which were accepted and acted upon at the time. “As civil proceedings are currently on-going, it would be inappropriate for Essex Police to comment further.” Mr Barrymore’s solicitors would not comment. The IPCC found that while there were failings in Essex Police’s handling of the case, it was “not borne out that the entire investigation was incompetent”. The Commission up-

held a number of the Lubbock family’s complaints, including one that stated the scene was not effectively preserved by police, that unauthorised people were allowed to stay at the scene and that the investigation was suspended prematurely. Timetable of events *March 2001, Stuart Lubbock dies at Michael Barrymore’s former home in Roydon, Essex, with severe internal injuries, indicating sexual assault, and ecstasy, cocaine and alcohol in his blood stream *October 2001, Michael Barrymore is given a caution for drug offences and allowing his home to be used for smoking cannabis after police inquiry into Stuart Lubbock’s death. No further charges are brought *February 2006, Mr Lubbock’s family are “blocked” from launch-

ing a private prosecution against the entertainer after a district judge rules there is insufficient evidence *June 2007, Mr Barrymore is arrested, along with two other men, on suspicion of serious sexual assault and murder. But in September, the Crown Prosecution Service announces that Mr Barrymore will not face charges over the death of Mr Lubbock *February 2009, the Independent Police Complaints Commission (IPCC) inquiry upholds six of 36 complaints and allegations made by Stuart’s father, Terry Lubbock. The IPCC finds two pieces of evidence - a pool thermometer and a door handle - went missing after Stuart’s death *March 2011, Ten years after Mr Lubbock’s death, police make a fresh appeal for information about the case


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Pacific plastic’s not so fantastic THE mighty cluster of plastic rubbish, swirling around in the Pacific Ocean, needs to be cleaned up urgently to protect marine life, say worried campaigners.

A survey to map the so-called Great Pacific Garbage Patch, which spans hundreds of miles of open sea, discovered that most of the debris consisted of large pieces.

Parents hit hard by price of school gear WITH just two weeks left before the kids return to school, many parents are already preparing supplies for their children and they’re not cheap!

Canary Islands mums and dads will have to spend an average of more than 500 euros per child. The Ministry of Education says this figure has dropped over the last five years - textbooks cost 200-300

euros for secondary schools, and around 300 euros for high school. In the case of primary school, the average spending on books is 300 euros; a new backpack, 20 euros; school supplies, 90 euros and the uniform is 50 euros. The Booksellers Association of Tenerife also anticipates a slight in-

crease in prices of textbooks because they are being updated. This forces parents to buy new materials because they cannot hand them down from older siblings. Association spokesman Esteban Hernández said these course books had changed for the 2nd, 4th and 6th grades.

But the protesters insist that failure to act soon will see this mass break up into dangerous microplastics, threatening marine life and even entering the human food chain. Data gathered by scientists and volunteers, during the month-long study involving nearly 30 vessels, will be used to form clean-up plans. The debris, concentrated by circular, clockwise ocean currents within an oblongshaped “convergence zone”, is near the Hawaiian Islands, midway between Japan and America’s west coast. During the survey, which included using aerial balloons and trawling equipment, researchers sought to complete an up-to-date estimate of the size of the patch, and chart hotspots. Hundreds of times, they revealed, they found more plastics

than organisms in the study areas. The trip was organised by The Ocean Cleanup, a group founded by 21-year-old Dutch inventor Boyan Slat. He has developed a technology which, he believes, can start removing the rubbish by the end of the decade. Mr Slat said: “The vast majority of the plastic in the garbage patch is currently locked up in large pieces of debris, but UV light is breaking it down into much more dangerous microplastics. “It will increase the amount of microplastics vastly over the next few decades if we don’t clean it up. It really is a ticking time bomb.” He added: “Every week plastic, with a volume about the size of two Empire State Buildings, flows into the oceans, where it damages ecosystems. It damages economy, and it also ends up in the food

chain, thereby damaging us, potentially.” The follow-up stage of the operation, planned for 2016, is the deployment in Japanese coastal waters of a mile-long scale model of a barrier collection system. The ultimate goal is for a 60mile barrier in the middle of the Pacific. The floating booms, anchored to the ocean floor and linked in a ‘V’ shape, would, hopefully, skim and concentrate plastics on the surface, while allowing marine life to pass underneath. Mr Slat said the project would be situated in international waters, away from shipping lanes. But critics claim the system is too costly, or unlikely to operate as designed. The Great Pacific Garbage Patch was discovered by Charles J Moore in 1997 as he returned home from the Transpacific Yacht Race, which starts in Los Angeles and ends in Honolulu.


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Winning joke, Hans down!

COMEDIAN Darren Walsh has topped the funny charts at the Edinburgh Fringe, winning first prize for the funniest joke.

British grandad helps flatten train gunman THE three Americans and a 62-year-old Brit, who helped overpower a gunman on a high-speed train to Paris, have been awarded France’s highest honour.

French President Francois Hollande, consumed with admiration, presented them with the Legion d’Honneur during a Paris ceremony at the Elysee Palace after they had risked their lives to safeguard the other passengers. American Air Force serviceman Spencer Stone, 23, US National Guardsman Alek Skarlatos, 22, and 23-yearold Sacramento State University student Anthony Sadler, who are pals, ignored the obvious danger when tackling the suspected terrorist and beating him unconscious. Chris Norman, a 62-year-old British IT consultant who lives in France, also joined in the fight, later telling Sky News he felt “extremely shaken” and lucky to be alive. He said he waded in

to help the three young Americans overwhelm the gunman because he thought he was “probably going to die anyway”. It was the most outstanding feat of courage by the married grandfather-of-two, especially at his age. All four men were justifiably hailed as heroes for springing into action when they saw the gunman cocking his assault rifle. “You also gave a lesson in courage, in will and, thus, in hope,” President Hollande told them as he presented their awards. “Since Friday, the entire world admires your courage, your sangfroid, your spirit of solidarity. “This is what allowed you, with bare hands - your bare hands - to subdue an armed man. This must be an example for all, and a source of inspiration.” He said the men showed the world that, “when faced with terror, we have the power to resist”. Mr Stone, who was stabbed while stopping the armed man, spoke publicly for the first time on Sunday, alongside Mr Skarlatos

and Mr Sadler, during a news conference at the US Embassy in Paris. He recalled how he woke from a “deep sleep”, turned around and saw the attacker in his carriage with an assault rifle “that looked like it was jammed”. He said Mr Skarlatos “hit” him on the shoulder and said “let’s go”, before they charged at the gunman and tackled him to the ground. Mr Stone, on leave from the US Air Force, grappled with the man and put him in a choke-hold, while Mr Skarlatos removed his assault rifle during last Friday evening’s confrontation. But the suspect fought back and “pulled more weapons” from his bag, including a handgun, which was also grabbed. Mr Stone was stabbed in the neck with a bolt cutter, and was also sliced in the hand, and then the pair, along with their other friend, Mr Sadler, started punching him. “He seemed like he was ready to fight to the end,” said Mr Sadler. “So were we!” He was eventually able to “choke him unconscious” and Mr

Skarlatos hit him in the head with one of the guns, before he was tied up with the help of Mr Norman. Mr Stone thanked the French doctors, police officers and others after his injured thumb had been “reattached”. He also received personal praise for helping to stop the bleeding of a French-American passenger, who had been shot. The train, passing through Belgium during the incident, was rerouted to the nearest station in Arras, northern France, where the suspect, a 26-year-old Moroccan national, named by Spanish media as Ayoub el Khazzani, was arrested. His lawyer said her client had been shocked and surprised “to the point of being amused” on being arrested. El Khazzani told police he found a bag in a Brussels park containing guns and a knife, and got the idea of robbing people. Jane Hartley US Ambassador to France, said President Barack Obama had praised the bravery of the four heroic passengers in a personal telephone call to President Hollande.

The 39-year-old from Peterborough, whose Punderbolt show is on at the Pleasance, attracted the most votes in the UK Pun Championship, run by TV channel Dave. He triumphed with: “I just deleted all the German names off my phone. It’s Hans free.” A delighted Walsh, who won his first Pun Championship last year, said: “What a punderful feeling.” It was the Championship’s eighth year, and previous winners include Tim Vine, Stewart Francis, Zoe Lyons and Nick Helm. This year saw the youngest comedian make the award shortlist, 12-year-old “Grace The Child” claiming 10th place. The funniest joke was chosen from a shortlist compiled by a panel of judges, who saw an average of 60 shows each at this year’s Edinburgh Fringe. The short-listed gags were then put to 2,000 people, with no reference to the comedians who told them. The people then voted for the jokes they found the funniest. Top-10 Fringe jokes 1. “I just deleted all the German names off my phone. It’s Hans free” - Darren Walsh 2. “Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge a*** ... but enough about Kanye West” Stewart Francis 3. “Surely every car is a people carrier?” Adam Hess

4. “What’s the difference between a ‘hippo’ and a ‘Zippo’? One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter” - Masai Graham 5. “If I could take just one thing to a desert island, I probably wouldn’t go - Dave Green 6. “Jesus fed 5,000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread. That’s not a miracle. That’s tapas” - Mark Nelson 7. “Red sky at night. Shepherd’s delight. Blue sky at night. Day” - Tom Parry 8. “The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper. She was wearing massive gloves” - Alun Cochrane 9. “Clowns divorce. Custardy battle” - Simon Munnery 10 “They’re always telling me to live my dreams. But I don’t want to be naked in an exam I haven’t revised for...” - Grace The Child The judges also released a list of jokes which just missed out on the short-list. “I never lie on my CV…because it creases it.” - Jenny Collier “If you don’t know what introspection is, you need to take a long, hard look at yourself” - Ian Smith “I usually meet my girlfriend at 12.59 because I like that oneto-one time” - Tom Ward “Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I’m reminded of the definition of a gentleman. It’s someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn’t” - Gyles Brandreth “Earlier this year I saw ‘The Theory of Everything’ - loved it. Should’ve been called ‘Look Who’s Hawking’ - that’s my only criticism” - James Acaster


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Legal matters

By Mariano Zunino Siri

MANY Canarian Weekly readers of different nationalities have asked me about the new EU regulation about Inheritance.

Their questions have been focused on the material law applicable to the Inheritance (national law of decedent, law of last domicile, law of situation of assets) referring to the taxation. In other words, the application of Inheritance and Gift Tax. I must point out that in Spain, there are many tax legislations: European, State and Autonomic (and Municipal). Firstly the technical bit. Regulation (EU) No 650/2012 of the European Parliament and of

THE TAX ON INHERITANCE

the Council of 4th July 2012 on jurisdiction, applicable law, recognition and enforcement of decisions, acceptance and enforcement of authentic instruments in matters of succession and on the creation of a European Certificate of Succession, in vigour since 17th August 2015, regulates the legal aspects of the applicable law to a succession by reason of death, and tries to harmonise the different European laws. For instance, in the Spanish case, applicable law to the inheritance is the national law of the decedent. Consequently, succession of a British national (for example) would be regulated by British material law notwithstanding the formalities of the country of situation of assets. In the case of Spain, formalities are

Telefonica speedy lines TELEFONICA has upgraded its fibre-optic links with the mainland, which will bring high-speed capacity to the islands via the ‘Pencan-7’ and ‘Pencan-8’ submarine cables. The 1,400km cables connect Cádiz with Las Palmas and Conil de la Frontera (in Cádiz) with Candelaria. They are part of the ‘Pencan’ Telefonica network, which con-

28th August - 3rd September 2015

nects the peninsula with the Canaries. This network now comprises four optical-fibre submarine cables with high capacity, offering ultra-broadband services in the Canaries. Maria Jesus Almazor, Director of Telefonica Spain, says the undersea cables have given an “excellent result in operation trials and will bring us the best performance and superior speed”.

the Title Deeds or Public Documents (with access to the Land Registry). This article does not pretend to be exhaustive regarding the application of material and formal law applicable to inheritances (to be included in other columns) but to explain briefly why the inheritance tax in Spain (depending on each Autonomous Community where the assets are located) is still applicable in spite of the European Regulation. In this respect, the Regulation expressly excludes matters related to Administrative Law (Public Law), which means that inheritance tax matters are regulated by the internal law of each Member State. Hence-

forth, it is the internal law that determines the calculation and way of payment of the taxes, being those taxes by the decedent at the time of the death. The Inheritance and Gift Tax in Spain affects the personal duties of all contributors with residence in Spain (according to the rules of the Income Tax) and they will be personally liable for the payment of the tax irrespective of the situation of the assets. In the case of non-residents there is a real obligation that taxes the acquisition of goods and rights located in Spanish territory and the perception of sums originated in life insurance. Law 22/2009 of 18 December which regu-

lates the finance of Autonomous Communities states with Inheritance Tax where the decedent has resided during the last five years before the death. Some Autonomous Communities require the payment of Inheritance tax while some others regulate the exemption (totally or partially). We will develop this matter in future columns. Many non-resident EU nationals could think that with the new Regulation they could avoid the payment of Inheritance Tax (or double taxation). This is not correct. The Regulation does not affect the taxation. However, the different taxation for residents and non-residents will be reviewed to avoid

discrimination. That is what the European Commission said in 2011 by means of a Recommendation (not enforceable) to avoid or moderate the double taxation in inheritance tax. In September 2014 the European Court ruled against Spanish State and that is why the legislation had to be modified in order to tax the non-resident inheritors in the same proportion of resident inheritors, this is, applying to non-residents the deductions applied to residents. Mariano Zunino Siri has been a registered lawyer in the Tenerife Bar Association since 1991. marianozuninosiri@gmail.com / abogado@abogadosmadridtenerife.com


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Business

By Laura Mann

of Blacktower Financial Management (International) Limited.

ARE you an expat? Do you still have funds in Individual Savings Accounts (ISAs) in the UK? Are you still contributing annually into your ISA? If the answer is Yes, please read on.

As an ex-pat, you may find yourself in danger of benefiting from taxfree allowances to which you are no longer entitled once you´ve moved abroad. HMRC reports that to be eligible for an ISA, you must be (at the time of opening the account): *16 or over for a cash ISA *18 or over for a stocks and shares ISA *Resident in the UK *A Crown servant (diplomatic or overseas civil service) or their spouse or civil partner if you

28th August - 3rd September 2015

Individual Savings Accounts (ISAs) don’t live in the UK There are two types of ISAs: *Cash ISA - you don’t pay tax on saving accounts’ interest *Stocks and shares ISA - you don’t pay tax on any income or capital gains you’ve made on your investments If you complete a tax return, you don’t need to declare any ISA interest, or profits on it. And you can invest (20152016) a total of £15,240. If you move abroad, you can’t put money into your ISA after the move (unless you’re a Crown employee working overseas, or a spouse or civil partner). However, you can keep your ISA open, and you’ll still get UK tax relief on money and investments held in it. In addition, if you have a fixed rate ISA which has, or will mature, while you are still living abroad, you cannot renew it in another ISA. You MUST move it elsewhere. You can, of course, pay into your ISA again if

you return and become a UK resident (subject to the annual ISA allowance). So what should you be doing with any possible surplus funds, that you should not be investing in UK-based ISAs as an ex-pat? If we consider that a standard “easy access” ISA is paying around 1.5% or 1.6% AER, Notice Account ISAs are paying around 1.75% AER (on balances over £24,000) and five-year Fixed Term ISAs are paying 2.55% AER (on minimum balances of £5,000) *Are you really making the most of your investments, even if the interest is tax free? There are many investment opportunities for your ISA funds which are compliant with your country of residence. Please just ask. Sourced from http:// www.moneywise.co.uk/ best-cash-isa-rates 25th August 2015 Laura Mann is Regional Manager Canary Islands at Blacktower

Financial Management (International) Ltd. Tel: 603 217 561 Email: info@blacktowerfm.com Website:www.blacktowerfm.com The above does not con-

stitute advice; you must seek clarification from your tax adviser regarding your personal tax situation. Blacktower Financial Management (International) Limited is licensed by

the Gibraltar Financial Services Commission. Licence 00805B. Blacktower Financial Management Limited is authorised and regulated by the UK Financial Conduct Authority.

Britons warned of the ‘plastic’ scam abroad B R I T O N S abroad have been warned that they are being conned when using plastic to pay for meals and hotels.

That’s because many opt to be charged in Sterling rather than the local currency. Their debit and credit card transactions account for an additional £300 million every year in Dynamic Currency Conversion (DCC) rates, which benefit the bank and the seller and is weighed heavily against the user, to the tune of up to 4% when they accept the option of being charged in Pounds. The issue arises whenever chip-and-pin terminals, or ATMs, give

users the choice of having their transactions processed in local currency or Sterling. Pressing the Yes button means customers give the banks the goahead to apply DCC to the sale - their own inflated exchange rate.

And even on top of the charges already imposed by the card company, the fee adds a further 4% to the bill - the fee split between the banks and the trader. Andrew Hagger - of Moneycomms.co.uk - told The Times: “It

means you are open to being charged at a higher exchange rate. So always decline DCC and ask to be billed in the local currency.” James Hickman, Managing Director of currency specialist company Caxton FX, said:

“When your bill arrives in a restaurant, for example, you may be offered the facility to pay in Pounds rather than the local currency. “This could incur a 4% service cost, on top of the value of the transaction, which goes straight to the retailer, so it’s in their interest to try to force it on unsuspecting customers. “Holiday-makers should be on the lookout for this holiday scam and make sure they don’t pay with their plastic in any currency but the local one.” Caxton FX says DCC payments are at the highest level ever, with Brits paying £292 million in fees annually,. The DCC is “sold” to travellers as a convenience which appears to

offer extra reassurance of knowing exactly how much will appear on their card statement. The add-on is completely legal and operated by companies which profit by converting your bill to Sterling, using a poor exchange rate. This lets them pocket a fee on every transaction. However, holidaymakers are now being warned to look out for the charge - and to decline it whenever offered. A UK Cards Association spokesman warned: “If DCC is used without your permission, you should remind the retailer that you didn’t want them to use DCC and ask for the receipt to be voided.”


www.canarianweekly.com 28th August - 3rd September 2015

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Saturday 29th August, ITV1, 20.00 Television’s biggest search for a music star is back as The X Factor returns to ITV, with a new stellar judging panel and a dynamic new presenting duo. The brand new super six sees Simon Cowell, Cheryl Fernandez-Versini, Nick Grimshaw and Rita Ora take their places at the judges’ desk, while presenters Olly Murs and Caroline Flack will be guiding the search to find a potential pop star with an amazing voice and that extra special something. Expect knock out vocals, big personalities and stand out stage presence as the auditionees tackle five key stages that stand in the way of their path to victory and securing a life changing record contract. In this weekend’s episodes the performers will sing in front of the judges and an arena audience of thousands to prove their worth with the aim of securing a place at Boot Camp.

The Xtra Factor Saturday 29th August, ITV2, 21.30 The Xtra Factor is back with brand new co-hosts Melvin and Rochelle. Brand new co-hosts, Melvin Odoom and Rochelle Humes have joined forces on this year’s The Xtra Factor where they’ll be bringing fans extra auditions and action, plus all the madness, mayhem and backstage news from the main show. The new duo will be getting up close and personal with the contestants, getting to know more about them as well as showing unseen auditions. And they’ll also be delving deeper with the judges, asking probing questions and finding out what they really think of each other. Live from the studio, Melvin and Rochelle will be getting the immediate fall out from the weekend’s performances, as well as all the judges’ uncensored reactions, when the live finals get underway. There will also be special guests, hilarious games and more outrageous gags than ever before.


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TV Guide

28th August - 3rd September 2015

F riday 06:00...................... Breakfast 09:15.................. Big Blue UK 10:00 ...... Homes Under the Hammer 11:00 ..........Don’t Get Done, Get Dom 11:30 ........Countryside 999 12:15 .............. Bargain Hunt 13:00 ...... BBC News at One 13:45 .........................Doctors 14:15 ........................The Link 15:00 ...............Escape to the Country 15:45 .................. The TV That Made Me 16:30........................... Flog It! 17:15 .......................Pointless 18:00.... BBC News at Six 19:00 .......The One Show 19:30 .............Canals: The Making of a Nation 20:00............. EastEnders 20:30....................Would I CW Lie to You? ch oice 21:00......... Ripper Street 22:00.... BBC News at Ten 22:35 ....Mountain Goats 23:05.. Pound Shop Wars 23:35....Gone Baby Gone 01:25 ..... Weather for the Week Ahead

06:00....... Homes Under the Hammer

06:00............. Good Morning Britain

07:00...........Don’t Get Done, Get Dom

08:30......................... Lorraine

07:30.........Countryside 999

09:25....................The Jeremy Kyle Show

08:15....... Gardeners’ World

10:30............... This Morning

08:45.... Great British Menu

10:55....................... ITV News

09:15... Victoria Derbyshire

11:00............... This Morning

11:00 .....................BBC News

12:30.......Guess This House

11:30 ....................... Athletics

13:30............... ITV News and Weather

15:15 .....................‘Allo, ‘Allo! 15:45..... Hidden Kingdoms 16:45..................Great British Railway Journeys

14:00.................... Dickinson’s Real Deal 15:00...............Tipping Point

17:15.Antiques Roadshow

16:00............ Hello Campers

18:00.............. Two Tribes

17:00....................... Rebound

18:30............... Eggheads

18:00.... ITV News London

19:00.................Athletics

18:30..........ITV News and Weather

20:00........... Mastermind 20:30...Gardeners’ World

19:00............ Emmerdale

21:00............The Great W C British Bake Off: choice An Extra Slice

19:30....Coronation Street 20:00.... Real Stories with Ranvir Singh

21:30...... Rick Stein From Venice to Istanbul

20:30..............Coronation Street

22:30..............Newsnight

21:00............BBQ Champ

23:05..Edinburgh Nights 23:35................ Wreckers

22:00...... ITV News at Ten and Weather

00:55........... Are Our Kids Tough Enough? Chinese School

01:05............ Jackpot247

22:40......... The Boat That Rocked


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TV Guide

28th August - 3rd September 2015

2 8 t h

A u g ust CW oice

06:00 .................Countdown

06:00 ............. The Wotwots!

06:45 ......................... Draw it!

06:10 .................Igam Ogam

07:10 ..........King of Queens

06:20 ...........Lily’s Driftwood Bay

07:35 ..........King of Queens 08:00 ........Everybody Loves Raymond 08:30.........Everybody Loves Raymond

06:10 ................ Doctor Who

13:15 ............................. Home and Away

06:00 ..................Moone Boy

13:45 .................Neighbours

07:00 ....................Road Wars

14:15 ............................... NCIS

08:00 ................................Glee

15:20 ................................ Fatal Performance

09:00 ......................The Flash

17:00 ..................5 News at 5

11:00...............Hawaii Five-0

06:40................ Toot the Tiny Tugboat 06:50 .....................Peppa Pig

09:00............................ Frasier

06:55...................... Pip Ahoy!

09:30............................ Frasier

07:10............. Little Princess

10:00............................The Big Bang Theory

07:20 ....The Mr. Men Show

10:30............................The Big Bang Theory 11:00..............The Simpsons 11:30..............The Simpsons 12:00.......... Channel 4 News Summary 12:05.................... Come Dine with Me

07:35 .................Thomas and Friends 07:50 ......Noddy in Toyland 08:00........... Ben and Holly’s Little Kingdom 08:15 .....................Peppa Pig 08:35......... Toby’s Travelling Circus

13:05............. Three in a Bed

08:45.....................Bananas in Pajamas

14:10..................Countdown

09:00 ...................Tickety Toc

15:00.............Fifteen to One

09:15 ........ The Wright Stuff

16:00.......French Collection

11:10 ................ Celebrity Big Brother

17:00.................... Come Dine with Me 18:00........ The Simpsons 18:30............... Hollyoaks

18:00.......................Home and Away

20:00.... Celebrity Fifteen to One 21:00...... 8 Out of 10 Cats Does Countdown 22:00...........The Last Leg 23:05............ Bad Robots 23:40............. Very British Problems 00:40...........Beasts of the Southern Wild

07:00 .........Motorway Cops 08:00 ...............Real Rescues 09:00............... Border Patrol 09:30 .............. Border Patrol 10:00 .......................... The Bill 11:00 ..............Tipping Point 12:00 .....Emergency Bikers 13:00 ...............Real Rescues 14:00 .............. Border Patrol 14:30 .............. Border Patrol 15:00 ..............Tipping Point 16:00 .......................... The Bill 17:00 .....Emergency Bikers 18:00 ...........Doctor Who 19:00 .... Motorway Cops 20:00 ............ The Glades 21:00 ..............The Strain 22:20 .................. Sin City

08:55............George Clarke’s Amazing Spaces 10:00.......................Jamie’s 15 Minute Meals 10:30............Kirstie’s Vintage Gems 10:55.. Warlords of Atlantis 12:55....................Time Team 14:00....Come Dine with Me 16:40......A Place in the Sun 17:45......A Place in the Sun 18:50...... George Clarke’s Amazing Spaces 19:55....... Grand Designs 21:00..............Resistance 22:15............. 24 Hours in A and E 23:20......... Embarrassing Bodies

00:45 ......... Saving Hope

00:25... Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares USA

01:40.................... Grimm

01:25....... Grand Designs

07:00 ................... Rocket City Rednecks

06:00 ................ One2eleven 06:30 ............. Football Gold 07:00 .......WWE Main Event 08:00 .......... Premier League 100 Club 08:30.......... Premier League 09:00.........Soccer A.M. - The Best Bits 09:30 ............. Football Gold 10:00 ......... Premier League 10:30 ................ Ricky Hatton Interviews Mike Summerbee 11:30................. One2eleven 12:00............. Football Gold 12:30 ......... Premier League 13:00 ........Capital One Cup 14:00 ......Time of Our Lives 15:00 .......... Premier League 100 Club 15:30.......... Premier League 16:00................. One2eleven 16:15.............. Football Gold 16:45................. One2eleven 17:00........... Premier League 100 Club

13:10 ........................... 5 News Lunchtime

17:30 .................Neighbours

19:00..... Channel 4 News

ch

06:00 ................. You’ve Been Framed! 06:20............................. Psych 07:05 ..................Emmerdale 08:10 .....Coronation Street 08:35 ................ Dinner Date 09:35 ............................. Psych 10:25 .........................The Real Housewives of Atlanta 12:10 ..................Emmerdale 13:15 .....Coronation Street 13:40 ................ Dinner Date 14:40 .............. Judge Rinder 15:40 ...................The Jeremy Kyle Show 19:00 ........... You’ve Been Framed! 20:00............... Two and a Half Men 21:00 ..............The Matrix Revolutions 23:30................Two and a Half Men 00:30........Crazy Beaches

06:30 .............. Fireman Sam

18:30 ....................5 News Tonight

06:30 ..................Moone Boy

10:00 ..............Hawaii Five-0 12:00...... NCIS: Los Angeles 13:00 ..............Hawaii Five-0 14:00 ..............Hawaii Five-0 15:00 ......................The Flash

19:00 ......................Police Interceptors

16:00 .............The Simpsons

20:00..................Aircrash

18:30 ....... The Simpsons

21:00...........Celebrity Big Brother

20:00 ............... Football’s Funniest Moments

22:30...........Celebrity Big Brother’s Bit on the Side

23 CW

18:00............... Futurama

07:20...........Extreme Fishing with Robson Green 08:10 ................. Traffic Cops 09:00 ................. Traffic Cops 10:00 ................. Traffic Cops 11:00 ................. Traffic Cops 11:30 ................. Traffic Cops 12:00 ................. Traffic Cops 13:00 ................. Traffic Cops 14:00...... American Pickers 15:00 ...... American Pickers 16:00 ...... American Pickers 19:00.... Storage Hunters 19:30.... Storage Hunters 20:00 ...................... QI XL

21:00.............A League of Their Own

22:00 ......Have I Got a Bit More News for You

23:30...........Celebrity Big Brother

22:00......................... Zoo

23:00..... 8 Out of 10 Cats

23:00......... Hawaii Five-0

00:00....................... QI XL

00:00..........Super Casino

01:40......... Hawaii Five-0

01:00....................... QI XL

The Great British Bake Off: An Extra Slice BBC2, 21:00

Sister series to The Great British Bake Off, in which Jo Brand is joined by three celebrity fans to take a look at the most recent episode, with interviews and unseen footage. It is desserts week, so Jo and her guests discuss the remaining nine bakers and their efforts. Whose signature creme brulees had the panel drooling? What did they make of the Spanish windtorte in the technical? Had they even heard of it? And whose tiered baked cheesecake show-stopper impressed them the most? Plus Jo and the panel taste bakes brought in by the studio audience and look at photos of your creations from home from perfect puds to disastrous desserts.


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TV Guide

28th August - 3rd September 2015

S aturday 06:00 ...................... Breakfast 10:00........ Saturday Kitchen Best Bites 11:30 ............Football Focus 12:00 .....................BBC News 12:10 ....................... Athletics 14:30 ............Rugby League: Challenge Cup Final 17:25 ..................Wallace and Gromit in the Curse of the Were-Rabbit 18:45 .............. BBC News 18:55........... BBC London News 19:00 ................Pointless 19:50 .......... The National Lottery 20:45................ Casualty 21:35........... Mrs. Brown’s Boys 22:05 .............. BBC News 22:25..................Match of the Day 23:55 ..... Weather for the Week Ahead 00:00............... BBC News

06:00 ............The Westerner 07:35 ............Big Jim Mclain 09:00 ...........More Creatures Great and Small 09:30............More Creatures Great and Small 10:00 ............... The Women’s Football Show 10:30 ....................... Athletics 12:10 ... Great British Menu 13:40 ......... Talking Pictures 14:25 .............................. That’s Entertainment! 16:30 ...................Final Score 17:30 ...... Gardeners’ World W Coice 18:00..............Athletics ch 19:00.. Proms Extra 2015 19:40.... Edwardian Farm 20:40 ............Dad’s Army 21:10 .....Sue Perkins’ Big Night Out 22:10...................Comedy Connections 22:40.....The Fall and Rise of Reginald Perrin 23:10 ..........Jack Dee - So What? Live 00:15.................Athletics

06:00............. The Aquabats! Super Show! 06:25............... Pat and Stan 06:35 ......................Dino Dan 06:45...................... Dino Dan 07:00...................... Canimals 07:05...................... Canimals 07:15............................. Sooty 07:30......................... Super 4 07:45................... Fish Hooks 08:00 ............. Young Justice: Invasion 08:25...................... ITV News 08:30 ......................Weekend 09:25 .......................... Murder, She Wrote 10:20.......... The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:20.......... The Jeremy Kyle Show 12:25.............. ITV News and Weather 12:35 ...................The Jeremy Kyle Show 13:35 ..............Tipping Point 14:35.................. You’ve Been Framed! 15:05 ....................The Chase

Athletics BBC2, 18:00 Gabby Logan introduces highlights of the penultimate day of action at the World Championships in Beijing, China. All eyes are on Great Britain’s Mo Farah, the reigning Olympic 5,000m and 10,000m champion, who is looking to defend his world title in the shorter distance. There are also British medal hopes in the men’s and women’s 4x100m relay finals - the GB women claimed bronze at the 2013 World Championships but their male counterparts missed out on a medal after an illegal changeover. Today also sees the final of the women’s 800m, in which Lynsey Sharp and Jenny Meadows will hope to challenge, plus the women’s high jump. Providing expert analysis and opinion alongside Gabby is four-time Olympic gold medallist Michael Johnson.

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Through the Keyhole ITV1, 21:30 Keith Lemon is back with a third series of the classic show that sees just how the other half live. Join Keith as he rummages around three mystery celebrity houses unearthing clues for the studio panel to guess ‘who habitates in a house like this.’ On this week’s star-studded panel are celebrity chef Gino D’Acampo, Corrie’s Sue Cleaver and comedian Johnny Vegas.

16:05 ................. Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory 18:00................. ITV News London 18:15......... ITV News and Weather 18:30............ You’ve Been Framed! 19:00.......... Keep it in the Family 20:00........... The X Factor 21:30........Through the Keyhole

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22:30..........ITV News and Weather 22:45............. The Bourne Ultimatum 00:45............ Jackpot247


aturday

www.canarianweekly.com

TV Guide

28th August - 3rd September 2015

2 9 t h

A u g ust

06:10 ........... How I Met Your Mother 06:35.........Everybody Loves Raymond 07:00................. Long Course Weekend 08:00 ..... The Morning Line

06:00......................Peppa Pig 06:05 .........................Bananas in Pajamas 06:15 ........................Angelina Ballerina

06:00 ...................Emmerdale Omnibus

06:10 ................ Doctor Who

08:55............... Salvage S.O.S

06:15 ...................Beauty and the Beast

09:20............... Salvage S.O.S

07:00 .................Who Do You Think You Are?

10:10.................. Flight of the Phoenix

08:00 .................Who Do You Think You Are?

13:00................Four in a Bed

12:00................ The X Factor

09:00 .......................... The Bill

13:05........... Kangaroo Jack

10:00 .......................... The Bill

15:45..........Penelope Keith’s Hidden Villages

14:50................... Homeward Bound II: Lost in San Francisco

11:00 .......................... The Bill

09:00.................... Coronation Street Omnibus

06:30 ......................Pip Ahoy!

09:00 ........................... Frasier

06:45 ...........................The Mr. Men Show

09:30 ........................... Frasier

06:55 .............Chloe’s Closet

10:00........................... The Big Bang Theory

07:05 ................Roobarb and Custard Too

10:30 ...........................The Big Bang Theory

07:15 ...............Make Way for Noddy

11:00 ...........................The Big Bang Theory

07:25 ....................Paw Patrol

16:40 ............A Night in with Olly Murs

07:45............. Little Princess

17:45................ The X Factor

08:00 ........... Wanda and the Alien

18:45........................ Hulk

11:30............. The Simpsons 12:00 .............The Simpsons 12:30............. The Simpsons 13:00........... Rude(Ish) Tube 13:30.......Channel 4 Racing 16:10 ................... Come Dine with Me 16:40 ................... Come Dine with Me 17:10.................... Come Dine with Me 17:40.................... Come Dine with Me 18:10............. Come Dine with Me

08:15 .........Zack and Quack 08:30 ........... Ben and Holly’s Little Kingdom 08:45 ...................Jelly Jamm 09:05 .....................LazyTown 09:30 ....................... Dora and Friends

10:18 .................. SpongeBob Squarepants 10:35 ........................... Access 10:50 ......................... Cowboy Builders

13:25 ........................... Patton 16:45 ..................... Operation Daybreak

20:00... Walking Through History

W 21:00..........Side Effects Coice ch 23:10............... Unknown

01:20.............Stranger by the Lake

19:00 ............ Beauty and the Beast 20:00 ................One Born Every Minute

16:50..........Penelope Keith’s Hidden Villages 17:55..........Penelope Keith’s Hidden Villages 18:55....... Grand Designs 20:00......Britain’s Wildest Weather 2014 21:35................Hurricane Katrina

21:00.................. Sin City

22:40......... Britain’s Killer Storms

23:30 ............Paranormal Witness

00:15...... 8 Out of 10 Cats Does Countdown

01:25.................... Grimm

01:20..... 8 Out of 10 Cats

06:00 ......... Are You Smarter Than a 10 Year Old?

07:10 .......................Top Gear

06:00 ................ One2eleven

07:00.................................Glee

08:00....................... Top Gear

06:15................ One2eleven

09:00 .......Red Bull Soapbox Race

06:30......... Barclays Premier League Review

10:00....... Red Bull Soapbox Race

07:00 .............. Major League Soccer

22:35 ......... American Pie Presents Band Camp 00:25.....................Mickey Blue Eyes

08:00.................. The Fantasy Football Club 09:00..... Football’s Funniest Moments 09:30..... Football’s Funniest Moments 10:00 ................. Soccer A.M.

11:00........Red Bull Soapbox Race 2015 13:00.....Red Bull Rampage

09:00.................. The Fantasy Football Club 10:00................. Soccer A.M.

12:00 ...............The F1 Show

14:00....................... Parks and Recreation

19:05 ...... The Nightmare Neighbour Next Door

13:00 ..... NCIS: Los Angeles

15:00..... Last Man on Earth

14:15 .............. Rugby Union

14:00 ..... NCIS: Los Angeles

15:30..... Last Man on Earth

16:00 ...........Modern Family

16:00.. Storage Hunters UK

17:00 ..............Ford Saturday Night Football

20:00.......Can’t Pay? We’ll Take it Away!

17:00.................. Yonderland

19:00....................Would I Lie to You?

20:00 ......... SNF: Game of the Day

21:00...................Football League Tonight

18:00 ....... The Simpsons

21:00....................... QI XL

22:00..............SNF: Match Choice

19:00.....................5 News Weekend

19:00 ............ Great Canal Journeys

15:00 ................. DIY SOS The Big Build

13:35................Four in a Bed

10:00 .................. SpongeBob Squarepants

11:50 .....................When Hell Broke Loose

18:35..... Channel 4 News

21:30...................The Xtra Factor

14:00 ................. DIY SOS The Big Build

09:50....River Cottage Bites

22:30...........Celebrity Big Brother 23:30......................Tattoo Disasters UK 00:00..........Super Casino

17:30 ................. Yonderland 20:00 ........ Hawaii Five-0 21:00................. The Man 22:40 ........ Hawaii Five-0 00:40 ........ Hawaii Five-0 01:40......... The Last Ship

23:00............Alan Davies: As Yet Untitled 00:00.......Have I Got a Bit More News for You 01:00....................Would I Lie to You?

12:00 ........................ Football

23:30..............SNF: Match Choice 01:00.......... International Rugby Union Highlights

25 CW

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Side Effects Channel 4, 21:00

Jude Law, Rooney Mara, Channing Tatum and Catherine Zeta-Jones star in Steven Soderbergh’s dark psychological thriller about big pharma, prescription medicines and psychiatry. Forced to face up to her reduced circumstances, Emily Taylor’s depression intensifies when her husband Martin is released from prison after four years’ incarceration for insider dealing. Emily becomes a patient of Dr Jonathan Banks after her involvement in a car crash is interpreted as an attempt at self-harm; and he prescribes an experimental anti-depressant following a further incident and a conversation with her former psychiatrist. At first the drug seems to produce perfect results. But then the side effects kick in, and their consequences are terrible for all involved. As Banks’s feelings morph from remorse to suspicion, he turns amateur sleuth - and discovers there’s more to the case than meets the eye.


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TV Guide

The Trials of Jimmy Rose ITV1, 21.00

Career criminal Jimmy Rose has spent the last twelve years in prison for armed robbery. Now aged 61, Jimmy is a free man and wants to be with his family, but his wife Jackie doesn’t know if she loves him anymore. Jimmy has to face up to commitment as a husband, father and grandfather… that means being around for his children, staying out of trouble and out of prison. However, his son Joe thinks he’s a waste of space and his daughter Julie has troubles of her own. And he’s trying to go straight on a zero hour contract at a DIY store and he can barely afford £3.69 for a coffee these days. When Jimmy finds out his granddaughter has gone off the rails, he’s determined to bring her home, but he triggers a chain of events that could force him back into crime… Jackie now faces an uncertain future with the man she loves but she’s harbouring a secret. Jimmy Rose lives by Newton’s laws of motion: but with every action there are unforeseen reactions and they may cost Jimmy his marriage, his freedom and even his life. Jimmy Rose emerges from prison after a 12-year stretch for armed robbery. Finally a free man at 61, he can’t wait to get home. But despite his grandson Elliot’s excitement and his Julie’s joy at having her father home after suffering a painful divorce, his homecoming is marred by his wife Jackie’s distance. His granddaughter Ellie and estranged son Joe are notably absent. And sister in law Sue can’t wait to get her husband Roy away from Jimmy. Finally alone, Jackie admits to Jimmy that she doesn’t know if she loves him anymore. Jackie is the love of his life and he is devastated. Jimmy is on license and is reminded by his probation officer that he needs to stick to his terms and tie down a job, so Jimmy reluctantly accepts a zero hour contract at a DIY store - a mundane world away from anything he’s ever known. Jimmy shows up uninvited to his granddaughter’s fifth birthday party but his successful son Joe boots him out, bitterly telling him that it’s no surprise that Ellie has wound up like him. Stunned, Jimmy learns from Roy that Ellie ran away to live with her boyfriend six months ago and is now a drug addict. But they only have the name of an estate in Lewisham. Ellie was the apple of his eye, Jimmy tracks her down on the estate and whilst she’s happy to see her granddad again, she’s showing signs of addiction. Her boyfriend, Aaron, slams the door in Jimmy’s face. Big mistake. Jimmy refuses to give up on Ellie, but the local GP proves ineffectual. With Jackie refusing to talk to him, Jimmy conscripts Roy to help drag Ellie home to get clean. Jimmy chases Aaron down and destroys his heroin stash, but both Aaron and Ellie escape leaving Jimmy with an empty “Pizza This” pizza box, a clue to their drug supply. Jimmy tells Jackie that he’s found Ellie but has to break the news that she’s become a heroin addict. Bonded by grief, they spend the night together, giving Jimmy hope in their marriage. Jimmy slips out to Pizza This to confront his granddaughter’s suppliers but he asks too many questions and is beaten unconscious. Being 61 and alive in this brave new world is proving not so easy.

28th August - 3rd September 2015

S unday 06:00 ...................... Breakfast 07:30 ...... Match of the Day 09:00 .....................BBC News 10:00 ...........................Sunday Morning Live 11:00 .............Wanted Down Under Revisited 12:00 .............. Bargain Hunt 13:00 .....................BBC News 13:15 ...... Homes Under the Hammer 14:15........................... Flog It! 14:55 ...............Escape to the Country 15:55 .........The Great British Bake Off 16:55.......... Songs of Praise 17:35 .....................BBC News 18:00 ............Countryfile W 19:00.......Big Blue Live Coice ch 20:00 ................ Casualty W 21:00..Partners in Crime Coice ch 22:00............... BBC News 22:20.BBC London News 22:30..................Match of the Day 2 23:30............ In the Valley of Elah 01:20...... Weather for the Week Ahead

06:00.......... Life in a Cottage Garden with Carol Klein 06:30................... Countryfile 07:30....... Gardeners’ World 08:00.......... The Beechgrove Garden 08:30.........Saturday Kitchen Best Bites 10:00.... Great British Menu 10:30.... Great British Menu 11:00........................ Athletics 14:30............................... That’s Entertainment! 16:30........Nature’s Weirdest Events 17:00............Jungle Atlantis 18:00............. The World’s Busiest Railway 2015 19:00 ................Athletics 20:00 ........ Dragons’ Den 21:00.......Special Forces Ultimate Hell Week 22:00..................Odyssey 22:40............. Family Guy 23:05............. Family Guy 23:25............. Family Guy 23:45........... Black Sheep 01:10.............Countryfile

06:00 .............The Aquabats! Super Show! 06:25 ................Pat and Stan 06:35 ......................Dino Dan 07:00...................... Canimals 07:15 .............................Sooty 07:30 ......................... Super 4 07:45................... Fish Hooks 08:00............. Young Justice: Invasion 08:25....................... ITV News 08:30...................... Weekend 09:25 ....Murder, She Wrote 10:20 ......... The Jeremy Kyle Show 12:25...................... ITV News 12:35 ......... The Jeremy Kyle Show 13:35 ................The X Factor 15:05..............Casino Royale 17:30 ....................The Chase 18:30.. ITV News London 19:00........ Animal Mums 20:00.......... The X Factor 21:00..........The Trials of CW Jimmy Rose choice 22:00 ............... ITV News 22:20...................... 56 Up 23:25..................... Singha Premiership Rugby 7s Highlights

Big Blue Live BBC1, 19.00 In the final episode the Big Blue Live team report from Monterey Bay, California, which is now brimming with life - including sooty shearwaters that fly thousands of miles from New Zealand to feast on fish. The team is also on the lookout for the bay’s biggest visitors - blue whales. The largest animal on the planet can be surprisingly elusive, so Steve Backshall uses air craft to spot them and Liz Bonnin joins scientists tagging these ocean giants. Despite their vast size, blue whales still face dangers and Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall discovers how shipping companies and biologists are working together to avoid deadly collisions vessels, while Matt Baker follows the cutest baby sea otter who is so important this entire ecosystem.


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TV Guide

28th August - 3rd September 2015

3 0 t h 06:15........... How I Met Your Mother

06:00................Children’s TV

06:40 ........Mobil 1 The Grid

06:55 ...............Make Way for Noddy

07:10..................... British GT

07:05 ....................Paw Patrol

07:35 ........Everybody Loves Raymond

07:20 ............. Little Princess

08:00........ Everybody Loves Raymond

07:35 ........... Wanda and the Alien

A u g ust 06:00 ..............Life’s Funniest Moments

06:00 ..... Who Do You Think You Are?

06:20 ...................Emmerdale Omnibus

06:10................ Doctor Who

09:30....... Coronation Street Omnibus 12:25 ................The X Factor

07:45 .........Zack and Quack

13:30 .............Small Soldiers

09:00........................... Frasier

08:00 ........... Ben and Holly’s Little Kingdom

15:40 ................. You’ve Been Framed!

09:30.......... Sunday Brunch

08:15................... Jelly Jamm

16:10 ................The X Factor

12:30 ........Amazing Spaces: Shed of the Year

08:35..................... LazyTown

17:45........... The Xtra Factor

09:05 ...... Dora and Friends

13:30........................... The Big Bang Theory

09:30.................. SpongeBob Squarepants

18:50 ......... Dante’s Peak

14:30 .............The Simpsons

10:05 ......... Football League Tonight

08:30 ........................... Frasier

15:25................ Phil Spencer: Secret Agent 16:30.....Location, Location, Location 17:35....................... A Place in the Sun 18:30..... Channel 4 News 19:00 ....... Secret History 20:00...Time Crashers Sir Tony Robinson presents the six-part immersive history series that sees 10 famous faces: Kirstie Alley, Fern Britton, Louise Minchin, Zoe Smith, Meg Mathews, Keith Allen, Greg Rutherford, Charlie Condou, Jermaine Jenas and Chris Ramsey leave the 21st century behind and crash-land into different moments in British history. In the second episode, the time crashers find themselves in 1468 - the golden age of chivalry. They all take on the role of male squires in the service of two knights who will go head-to-head in a joust. The squires are in two opposing camps - the blacks and the reds, and they must ready their respective knights for the joust. Everything they do; from prepping the horses, to fixing armour and dressing their knights has a bearing on which team will win.

21:00....... The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel 23:25................. One Day 01:25.....Tom at the Farm

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21:00...... The Xtra Factor 22:00............. Rush Hour

06:45 ..........DIY SOS The Big Build 07:45...........DIY SOS The Big Build 08:45.......... DIY SOS The Big Build 11:50 ......................... Another Cinderella Story 13:40......................... Magic in the Water 15:40 ................... Space Jam 17:25 ..............Open Season

08:55.... Double Your House for Half the Money 10:00............George Clarke’s Amazing Spaces 11:00..................Four Rooms 12:05... Selling Houses with Amanda Lamb 13:05................ Small Animal Hospital 14:40................Four in a Bed 15:10................Four in a Bed 15:45................Four in a Bed 17:15.. Come Dine with Me 20:00......Salvage S.O.S CW ch oice 20:30......... Salvage S.O.S 21:00 ................Car S.O.S 22:00........Sarah Millican: Chatterbox Live 23:05......... Embarrassing Bodies 00:05....... Ramsay’s Hotel Hell 01:05.................Car S.O.S

00:05............... Safeword

19:05.................. Another Cinderella Story

11:35 ... Police Interceptors

00:50........ Fake Reaction

21:00 ............ The Glades

13:25 ........ Cutthroat Island

01:30...... Totally Bonkers Guinness World Records

23:50 ............Paranormal Witness

01:55.........Life’s Funniest Moments

01:40 ........... Who Do You Think You Are?

06:00.... The Hour of Power

07:10 ..........Extreme Fishing with Robson Green

06:00.................... SNF: Match Choice

08:00 .......................... Storage Hunters UK

07:30.................... SNF: Match Choice

08:30.......................... Storage Hunters UK

09:00 .................. The Sunday Supplement

09:00 .......................... Storage Hunters UK

10:30......................... Goals on Sunday

09:30 .......................... Storage Hunters UK

12:30.....................Ford Super Sunday

15:40.......................Paul Blart: Mall Cop 17:30 ....................Superman 20:05 ......................Police Interceptors: Unleashed

00:45................... Grimm

20:55.....................5 News Weekend 21:00...........Celebrity Big Brother 22:00......20 Moments That Rocked the 80s Clip show hosted by actress Cherie Lunghi, star of the 80s Kenco ads and TV series The Manageress. From royal weddings, political storms and financial disasters to the birth of iconic entertainers, ratingssmashing TV shows and sporting triumphs, all the headline-grabbing events of the turbulent 80s are recalled, many of which had an impact not just in the UK but across the globe.

07:00 ......... Are You Smarter Than a 10 Year Old? 08:00 ............. Ashley Banjo’s Secret Street Crew 09:00 ................................Glee 11:00 .................... WWE Raw 12:00 .... Football’s Funniest Moments 12:30.............. Hawaii Five-0 14:30 ..................... Futurama 15:00 ..................... Futurama 17:00 .............The Simpsons 17:30 .............The Simpsons 19:00.. King of the Nerds 20:00 ........ The Last Ship 21:00......................... Zoo 22:00........School of Hard Knocks 23:00.....An Idiot Abroad

23:30......... Shoot ‘Em Up

00:00......... Hawaii Five-0

01:10..........Super Casino

01:00......... Hawaii Five-0

Partners In Crime BBC1, 21.00

Tommy has finally found the missing scientist Gilbert Worthing, but they are both being held against their will at Commander Haydock’s... and we’re still none the wiser as to who N really is. It turns out that Gilbert managed to hide a vital key to his device before his capture, and that without it the bomb N and Haydock have stolen is entirely useless. So when Tuppence storms Haydock’s house and helps Tommy and Gilbert to escape, it seems like the only thing left to do is retrieve the key from the strange place Gilbert hid it…the only problem is that it’s in the Sans Souci, where N is lying in wait. When N gains possession of the key Tommy and Tuppence find themselves once again backed into a corner. With Carter’s help they must come up with their most ambitious and risky plan yet to save the lives of thousands of innocent British citizens.

13:00 .......................Top Gear 14:00 .......................Top Gear

15:30.....................Ford Super Sunday

20:00 ................ Dynamo: Magician Impossible

19:00..................Football

21:00.......Have I Got a Bit More News for You 22:00................ Parks and Recreation 22:30................ Parks and Recreation

21:30..................Football

23:00...... Mock the Week

23:30.......... Ford Football Special

01:00...........Eddie Izzard: Force Majeure - Live

01:00................. NFL Hard Knocks

27 CW

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Salvage S.O.S More 4, 20:00

Following the team at a US architectural salvage operation as they visit more homes and buildings that have been condemned to be demolished. Their goal is to secure the remarkable pieces of America’s past hidden inside these old structures before they are lost for ever. These salvaged vintage items include doors, windows, mantelpieces, stairwells and bathtubs. Once they are recovered, these valuable pieces can be used to restore other historical buildings and add character to newer structures. In the seventh episode, the crew salvage wood from a cabin built in 1845 at Smith Mountain Lake near Moneta, Virginia, and use it to create a four-poster bed to sell in the shop. Light fixtures and a bathtub are saved from an 1880s house in south-west Virginia and, in New York City, the fire doors that were previously salvaged from the Washington Mill are installed.


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TV Guide

Dinosaur Britain ITV1, 21.00

Dinosaurs! The very word conjures up fascination and intrigue with millions of us dreaming of becoming a palaeontologist when we were younger. Yet few of us realise that over 50 different dinosaur species have been found in Britain. Dinosaur Britain tells the amazing story of many of the dinosaurs that once roamed our country revealing how they hunted, what they ate and how they died from the evidence revealed from their bones. Presenter Ellie Harrison, who fell in love with dinosaurs as a child, teams up with 25-year-old Dean Lomax, one of Britain’s youngest palaeontologists, to bring Dinosaur Britain to life as never before. Ellie and Dean come ‘face to face’ with incredible CGI dinosaurs against the backdrop of some of Britain’s most famous landmarks – including Big Ben and Stonehenge. Britain has yielded one of the best dinosaur fossil records anywhere in the world. Giant Sauropods measuring over 20 metres – the length of two double decker buses – once lived throughout Britain. Raptors, fast moving and carnivorous pack-hunters, were discovered in Dorset – along with three types of Tyrannosaur. Huge teeth from the Iguanodon were discovered in Sussex while stegosaurs, with armoured plates positioned along their back, lived in Swindon and Peterborough. From the world’s first dinosaur discovery in Stonesfield, Oxfordshire in 1824 to the most recent discovery – a new dinosaur species discovered in Wales in 2014 – Dinosaur Britain features the most fascinating dinosaur finds across Britain to tell an enthralling story 200 million years in the making.

28th August - 3rd September 2015

Monday 06:00 ...................... Breakfast 09:00 .............Wanted Down Under Revisited 09:45....... Homes Under the Hammer 10:45...........Don’t Get Done, Get Dom 11:15.........Countryside 999 12:00............... Bargain Hunt 13:00....... BBC News at One 13:20.....BBC London News 13:30................... Moving On 14:15.........................The Link 15:00................Escape to the Country 15:45................Oxford Street Revealed 16:30............................Flog It! 17:15........................Pointless 18:00..... BBC News at Six 18:30................ The Royal Edinburgh Military Tattoo 2015 19:30............ Wallace and Gromit: A Close Shave 20:00............. EastEnders 20:30...............Room 101 21:00.....Danny and the W C Human Zoo choice 22:30.... BBC News at Ten 23:00........ Have I Got Old News for You 23:30............ Who Do You Think You Are? 00:30...... Weather for the Week Ahead

06:00...Flog it! Trade Secrets 06:30....... Homes Under the Hammer 07:30...........Don’t Get Done, Get Dom 08:00.........Countryside 999 08:45..................Animal Park 09:15...... Sinbad: Legend of the Seven Seas 10:35.................. Beverly Hills Chihuahua 12:00..............Natural World 13:00...............Holiday of My Lifetime with Len Goodman 13:30.......Anthony Hopkins 14:15.....The World’s Fastest Indian 16:15..................Great British Railway Journeys 16:45.................... Two Tribes 17:15... Antiques Roadshow 18:00..................Eggheads 18:30.....Terry and Mason’s Great Food Trip 19:00..........This Wild Life 19:30.. Great British Menu 20:00............... University Challenge 20:30......... Only Connect 21:00..... An Evening with Harry Enfield and Paul Whitehouse 22:00.......... Smashey and Nicey: The End of an Era 22:45......... Dragons’ Den 23:45..................Odyssey 00:30.... The Great British Bake Off

06:00.......... Bottom Knocker Street 06:10............... Share a Story 06:15..............................Sooty 06:30.............. Almost Naked Animals 06:45.............. Almost Naked Animals 07:00............. Good Morning Britain 08:30......................... Lorraine 09:25.....Murder, She Wrote 10:30.......................Columbo 12:30................ Catchphrase 13:15............... ITV News and Weather 13:30........Off Their Rockers 14:00.................... Dickinson’s Real Deal 15:00...............Tipping Point 16:00............ Hello Campers 17:00 ....................The Chase 18:00.. ITV News London 18:30...........Gino’s Italian Escape 19:00............ Emmerdale 19:30....Coronation Street 20:00..............Britain as CW Seen on ITV choice 20:30....Coronation Street 21:00...Dinosaur Britain

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22:00..... ITV News at Ten

22:20.......................Plebs 23:20...... River Monsters 00:15............ Jackpot247

Danny And The Human Zoo BBC1, 21.00 Danny and The Human Zoo is the fictionalised account of Lenny Henry’s life as a talented teenager in 1970s Dudley, made by RED Production Company for BBC One. Danny’s world is a series of complex minefields which he has to negotiate: his home life - which his ebullient mother rules with an iron fist in an iron glove; his love life - where the Irish girl he’s in lust with won’t give him the time of day until he wins his first competition; and finally the ups and downs of his emerging career. When Danny wins a talent competition at his local club it’s not long until he’s working the comedy circuit. Audiences can’t get enough, applauding as he effortlessly morphs into Mohammed Ali, Tommy Cooper and Frank Spencer, and eventually he hits the big time on TV - an unheard-of achievement for a young black boy. But an unscrupulous manager takes advantage of Danny and forces him to star in a show, the ‘Musical Minstrel Cavalcade’. Danny hits rock bottom. Having made his name by becoming other people, Danny has to save himself by finding out who he really is.


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TV Guide

28th August - 3rd September 2015

3 1 st 06:00 .................Countdown 06:45 ......................... Draw it! 07:10.......... King of Queens 07:35 ..........King of Queens 08:00 ........Everybody Loves Raymond 08:30 ........Everybody Loves Raymond 09:00 ........................... Frasier 09:30 ........................... Frasier 10:00 .............The Simpsons 10:30 .............The Simpsons 11:00............. The Simpsons 11:30............. The Simpsons

12:00................... Come Dine with Me 13:05 ............ Three in a Bed 14:10 .................Countdown 15:00 ............Fifteen to One 16:00 ......French Collection 17:00 ................... Come Dine with Me 18:00........ The Simpsons 18:30............Hollyoaks

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19:00.... Channel 4 News

19:30............. Bear’s Wild Weekend with Jonathan Ross 20:30........................ Food Unwrapped 21:00 .............. The Catch 22:00 .........Breaking into Britain 23:00................My Tattoo Addiction 23:50............. 24 Hours in A and E 00:45................. The Food Hospital 01:40............. The Golden Dream

06:00 ............. The Wotwots! 06:10 .................Igam Ogam 06:20 ...........Lily’s Driftwood Bay 06:30 .............. Fireman Sam 06:40 ................Toot the Tiny Tugboat 06:50 .....................Peppa Pig 06:55 ......................Pip Ahoy! 07:10............. Little Princess 07:20 ...........................The Mr. Men Show 07:35 ..........................Thomas and Friends 07:50 ............................ Noddy in Toyland 08:00 ........... Ben and Holly’s Little Kingdom 08:15 .....................Peppa Pig 08:30.......................Milkshake Monkey 08:35 .........Toby’s Travelling Circus 08:45..........................Bananas in Pajamas 09:00....................Tickety Toc 09:15......... The Wright Stuff 11:45.........................Celebrity Big Brother 12:45... 5 News Lunchtime 12:50........ Home and Away 13:20................. Neighbours 13:50 ............................... NCIS 14:50 ......................Silverado 17:25 ..................5 News at 5 17:30 .................Neighbours 18:00.... Home and Away 18:30.....Criminals: Caught on Camera 18:55...... 5 News Tonight 19:00............Cricket on 5 20:00... Beware: The Cops are Watching 21:00...........Celebrity Big Brother 22:00......Big Boobs Gone Bad: A Botched Up Bodies Special 23:00...........Celebrity Big Brother’s Bit on the Side 00:00....Under the Dome

au g ust 06:00 ..............All Star Family Fortunes

06:00 ...................Road Patrol Australia

06:45...................Emmerdale

06:10 ................ Doctor Who

07:20......Coronation Street 08:20.......................The Cube

08:35 ..........The Truth about Killer Dinosaurs

09:15.......... The Jeremy Kyle Show

09:40.......... The Truth about Killer Dinosaurs

12:30...................Emmerdale

10:45.... Magic in the Water

13:00......Coronation Street

12:45.......................... Another Cinderella Story

14:00.. You’ve Been Framed and Famous!

01:00.............Paranormal Witness

08:55............George Clarke’s Amazing Spaces 10:00....River Cottage Bites 10:15....................Time Team 11:20........ Summer Holiday 13:30.................... Come Dine with Me 16:10................Four in a Bed 16:40................Four in a Bed 17:15................Four in a Bed 17:50................Four in a Bed 18:20..........Four in a Bed 18:50...... George Clarke’s Amazing Spaces 19:55....... Grand Designs 21:00......... The Supervet 22:00............. 24 Hours in A and E 23:10......... Embarrassing Bodies 00:10................. Ramsay’s Hotel Hell 01:05......... The Supervet

07:00 ................... Rocket City Rednecks 07:25 ...................Bush Pilots 08:10 ...................Bush Pilots 09:00....................... Top Gear 10:00....................... Top Gear 11:40 .......................Top Gear 13:20 .......................Top Gear 16:00 .......Red Bull Soapbox Race 2015 18:00................. Dynamo: Magician Impossible 20:00................ Parks and Recreation 20:30................ Parks and Recreation 21:00................. Last Man on Earth 22:00........................Suits 23:00....................... QI XL 00:00..... 8 Out of 10 Cats 01:00.... Storage Hunters 01:30.... Storage Hunters

06:00 ................ One2eleven 06:15 ................ One2eleven 06:30............. Football Gold 06:45............. Football Gold 07:00..................... WWE Raw 08:00....... Goals on Sunday 09:00 ............... Ford Football Special 10:30...................... Challenge Cup Final Highlights 11:30 ............. Football Gold 11:45............. Football Gold 12:00 ........ Andy Murray: US Open Champion 13:00..... Women’s US Open Final 2013 14:00 ..........Tennis: Us Open Final 2013 15:00.......... Tennis: Us Open Final 2014 16:00........ U.S. Open Tennis 00:00.......................... U.S. Open Tennis

14:35.................... Space Jam

15:00.............Cats and Dogs

16:20...............Open Season

16:50.................The X Factor

18:00............Doctor Who

17:50........... The Xtra Factor

19:00..... Motorway Cops

18:55................Peter Pan

20:00............. The Glades

21:00............. The Bourne Identity

21:00..... Motorway Cops

23:25............ The Job Lot

23:00.......... Saving Hope

00:30...................Two and a Half Men 01:20....................... Mom 01:45....................... Mom

06:00............... The Real A&E 06:30 .............. The Real A&E 07:00 ......Sun, Sea and A&E 08:00 .............Chris and Wes: Let’s Do This 09:00 ..............Hawaii Five-0 10:00.............. Hawaii Five-0 11:00 ..... NCIS: Los Angeles 12:00 ...........Modern Family 12:30 ...........Modern Family 17:00............. The Simpsons 17:30..................... Futurama 18:00............... Futurama 18:30........ The Simpsons 19:00........ The Simpsons 20:00...........Duck Quacks Don’t Echo 21:00...... Modern Family 22:00......... Hawaii Five-0 23:00......... Hawaii Five-0 00:50..NCIS: Los Angeles 01:40......... Hawaii Five-0

22:00............ Traffic Cops 00:00.............Paranormal Witness

29 CW

W C c h oice Britain: As Seen on ITV ITV1, 20.00

To help celebrate ITV’s 60th anniversary Britain: As Seen on ITV tells the story of our changing nation through extraordinary real-life footage seen on our screens over the last 60 years. From our changing attitudes to fashion and the food on our plates, pop music and the weather, our homes and our hobbies, the series features rare and forgotten footage often not seen on television since it first aired on ITV, in many cases decades ago. Put together, the clips paint an often quirky picture of how all of our lives have undergone an extraordinary transformation since ITV first hit our screens in 1955.

Hollyoaks Channel 4, 18:30

At the end of his tether, Tom sets a revenge plan in motion that’s set to send ripples through the village. Tony pulls out all the stops to impress Diane, and Harry feels his crush is slipping through his fingers - what will he do?


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TV Guide

W C c h oice

Cash In Hand! Payday Loans

28th August - 3rd September 2015

T uesday

ITV1, 21.00

‘No-one wakes up and says, ‘I want to become a debt collector.’’ “My dad responds to my job by saying I work in finance. It’s like a family secret.” For the first time ever viewers will get to see the inner workings of the controversial payday loan industry as cameras film the team in the collections department of lenders Uncle Buck. Founded by Steve Murray 10 years ago, from the backroom of a pawn broking shop, the payday lender now employs a staff of almost 70 at its offices in a discreet corner of Kent. Cameras join the company’s management and collection agents at the beginning of May, providing an insight into the range of characters, egos and working culture in a team in which employees must reach a collection target of £270,000 by the end of the month in order to receive their bonus, supplementing their £20,000 basic salary. Cash In Hand! Payday Loans captures the tension of often cat-andmouse exchanges between customers being pursued for unpaid loans and the team members whose bonuses depend on finding ways to make them agree to pay up. Massimo is Uncle Buck’s Head of Collections, and his challenge is to keep his troops upbeat without making them over zealous. He says: “We need to create an atmosphere where the guys are motivated and happy, because they’re speaking to people that have some kind of issue. But not putting things in place that almost incentivise them to do the wrong thing.” An additional goal for the collections team is to get their name on the ‘Top Performer‘ shield, a champions-of-champions prize for all-round excellence. However, those who work in the money-lending business don’t always want the world to know about it. One worker says: “My dad responds to my job by saying I work in finance. It’s like a family secret.” Another adds: “No-one wakes up and says, ‘I want to become a debt collector.’’’ With just 10 per cent of loan applications approved, Uncle Buck issues around 12,000 payday loans every month, with almost 90 per cent repaid on time. But if a customer is late, they can expect to hear from one of the collection agents – and if they don’t agree a repayment plan, the calls will keep on coming... Boss Steve says: “If you were to take out a loan for £300 you would pay back about £458 over three months. We are expensive but it’s very, very short-term. It could be a lot more if you went into your overdraft in an unauthorised way.” As for who takes out these loans, the agents say: “We could be dealing with police officers, solicitors, labourers, people working for the NHS, paramedics, cleaners, taxi drivers, people in the City, IT, a lot of people in the army, there’s a TV presenter on our books at the moment.” Steve adds: “I like lending money, I like making the right decisions, I like the people here. If you’re talking about how much money we’re lending each month, we’re talking about £2.4 million at the moment, which is a fair sum, but our market-share is comparatively very small, probably 2 or 3 per cent. So you can imagine the level of a demand there is for this product in the UK.” Political pressure at the beginning of 2015 saw regulators impose a price-cap and strict rules on lending and interest rates, though an unexpected result of this crackdown was an increase in consumer confidence in the payday product. Many firms still trading have actually prospered. With such demanding targets to reach, competitiveness is rife amongst the workers, with agent Jack known to regularly arrive two hours early for his shift in a bid to get his name on the shield that marks the best performing staff. He says: “I’m the most competitive person on the floor, I don’t like losing.” Team member Charles adds: “Quite a lot of people want to be like me. Some people say that I think I’m all that…I am all that. And then some.” And with the end of the month, and therefore payday, in sight it’s time for the collections team to call in the money, with only a final few hours to try and hit their targets and get their bonuses…

06:00 ...................... Breakfast 09:15 .............Wanted Down Under Revisited 10:00 ...... Homes Under the Hammer 11:00...........Don’t Get Done, Get Dom 11:30.........Countryside 999 12:15............... Bargain Hunt 13:00....... BBC News at One 13:30.....BBC London News 13:45..........................Doctors 14:15 ........................The Link 15:00............... Escape to the Country 15:45................Oxford Street Revealed 16:30............................Flog It! 17:15........................Pointless 18:00..... BBC News at Six 18:30... BBC London News 19:00 .......The One Show 19:30 ............ EastEnders 20:00 ............. Holby City 21:00...........New Tricks

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22:00.... BBC News at Ten

22:35.............. Me and My New Brain 23:35.. Live at the Apollo 00:05...... Weather for the Week Ahead 00:10............... BBC News

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06:00....... Homes Under the Hammer 07:00...........Don’t Get Done, Get Dom 07:30 ........Countryside 999 08:15............... Escape to the Continent 09:15... Victoria Derbyshire 11:00 .....................BBC News 12:00......... My Life in Books 12:30.....Britain’s First Photo Album 13:00..... The Rockford Files 13:45....Yes, Prime Minister 14:45......................‘Allo, ‘Allo! 15:45........ Penguins - Spy in the Huddle 16:45..................Great British Railway Journeys 17:15.............Football Focus 18:00............... Eggheads 18:30.....Terry and Mason’s Great Food Trip 19:00..........This Wild Life 19:30.. Great British Menu 20:00.... The Hairy Biker’s Northern Exposure 21:00.....India: Nature’s W C Wonderland choice 22:00............. The Perfect Morecambe and Wise 22:30..............Newsnight 23:15.......Special Forces Ultimate Hell Week 00:15............Building the Ancient City

06:00............. Good Morning Britain 08:30......................... Lorraine 09:25....................The Jeremy Kyle Show 10:30.............. This Morning 12:30.............................. Loose Women 13:30.............. ITV News and Weather 14:00.................... Dickinson’s Real Deal 15:00 ..............Tipping Point 16:00............................... Hello Campers 17:00.................... The Chase 18:00................. ITV News London 18:30..........ITV News and Weather 19:00............ Emmerdale 20:00................. Dinosaur Britain 21:00.......Cash in Hand! CW Payday Loans choice 22:00...... ITV News at Ten and Weather 22:40............Through the Keyhole 23:40............... Benidorm 00:35............ Jackpot247

India: Nature’s Wonderland BBC2, 21.00

India is a land where the natural world has been woven into people’s lives, a place where you can see animals that exist nowhere else on earth and where wilderness still holds strong. Wildlife expert Liz Bonnin, actor Freida Pinto and mountaineer Jon Gupta reveal the wonders of India’s natural world. In this first episode, Liz visits the Gir Forest, home to the world’s last Asiatic Lions, and witnesses two females hunting. Freida meets a man who has dedicated his life to the Hoolock Gibbon - India’s only ape which greets the morning by singing. Jon climbs high into the Himalayas and stops off at Devprayag to bathe in the sacred waters at this holy place where the river Ganges begins. The mountains of the south are carpeted in tea but they are also home to the largest of India’s land mammals, the Asian Elephant. Liz has the opportunity to see the unique sight of elephants walking through a tea plantation and hears how the local people are helping elephants and the plantations to live alongside each other. Freida has always wanted to meet a baby elephant and is left speechless when one reaches out with its trunk to take her hand. Liz gets the chance to see for the first time the beguiling way south India celebrates the spirit of the Tiger; The Puli Kali or Tiger Dance is a unique performance where it seems that the bigger the belly, the better the tiger. Also in the programme, the Himalayas hide a valley of flowers. Freida vis- its a land she learnt about at school where it rains nearly every day, and she stands on a bridge, grown using the living roots of trees. Liz visits a Hornbill nest to see how a couple protects its young and to hear one of the most magical sounds of the rainforest - the beating of the male Hornbill’s wings.


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TV Guide

28th August - 3rd September 2015

1 st

S epte m ber

06:00 .................Countdown

06:00 ............. The Wotwots!

06:45 ......................... Draw it!

06:10 .................Igam Ogam

07:10 ..........King of Queens

06:20 .Lily’s Driftwood Bay

07:35 ..........King of Queens

06:30 .............. Fireman Sam

08:00 ........Everybody Loves Raymond

06:40 ................Toot the Tiny Tugboat

08:30.........Everybody Loves Raymond

06:55...................... Pip Ahoy!

09:00............................ Frasier 09:30............................ Frasier 10:00.............................For the Love of Cars 11:00......... Undercover Boss Australia 12:00.......... Channel 4 News Summary 12:05.................... Come Dine with Me 13:05 ............ Three in a Bed 14:10 .................Countdown

06:50 .....................Peppa Pig 07:10............. Little Princess 07:20.......... Bob the Builder 07:35... Thomas and Friends 07:50...... Noddy in Toyland 08:00 ........... Ben and Holly’s Little Kingdom 08:15 .....................Peppa Pig 08:25 .....................Peppa Pig 08:30 ... Milkshake Monkey 08:35..........Toby’s Travelling Circus 08:45... Bananas in Pajamas 08:55...Milkshake! Bop Box

06:00.............. The Hot Desk 06:10 ............................. Psych 06:55 ..................Emmerdale 07:25..... Coronation Street 08:30 ................ Dinner Date 09:30 ............................. Psych 10:20 .........................The Real Housewives of Atlanta 12:10 ..................Emmerdale 12:40..... Coronation Street 13:40................ Dinner Date 14:40 .............. Judge Rinder 15:40 ......... The Jeremy Kyle Show 19:00 ........... You’ve Been Framed! 20:00............... Two and a Half Men 21:00......... Hell’s Kitchen 22:00......... American Pie: The Wedding 00:00................Two and a Half Men 00:55......... Hell’s Kitchen

06:10................ Doctor Who 07:00 .........Motorway Cops 08:00 ...............Real Rescues 09:00.............. Border Patrol 10:00 .......................... The Bill 11:00 ..............Tipping Point 12:00 .....Emergency Bikers 13:00 ...............Real Rescues 14:00 .............. Border Patrol 15:00.............. Tipping Point 16:00.......................... The Bill 17:00 .....Emergency Bikers 18:00........... Doctor Who 19:00..... Motorway Cops 20:00............. The Glades 21:00...... Louis Theroux’s LA Stories 22:15.... My Breasts and I 23:15.......... Saving Hope 00:15.............Paranormal Witness 01:10............ Who Do You Think You Are?

08:55............George Clarke’s Amazing Spaces

07:00 ................... Rocket City Rednecks 07:25 .......................Top Gear 08:15 .................... Scrapheap Challenge 09:00 ...... American Pickers 10:00 .... Lizard Lick Towing 11:00........ Storage Hunters 12:00 .......................Top Gear 14:00 .................... Scrapheap Challenge 15:00 ...... American Pickers 16:00 .......................Top Gear 18:00.............. Scrapheap Challenge 19:00...American Pickers 20:00................... Storage Hunters UK 21:00....................... QI XL 22:00............ Taskmaster 23:00........ Dave Gorman: Modern Life is Goodish 00:00....................... QI XL 01:00... Last Man on Earth

06:00.........Football Gold

15:00 ............Fifteen to One

09:00....................Tickety Toc

16:00 ......French Collection

09:15......... The Wright Stuff

17:00 ................... Come Dine with Me

11:10......... Beware! Cowboy Builders Abroad

18:00........ The Simpsons

12:10.....5 News Lunchtime

18:30 .............. Hollyoaks

12:15.........................Celebrity Big Brother

06:00............... The Real A&E

13:15..........Home and Away 13:45..................Neighbours

08:00 .............Chris and Wes: Let’s Do This

14:15................................ NCIS

09:00 ......................The Flash

15:15...................Dark Desire

10:00 ..............Hawaii Five-0

17:00...................5 News at 5

12:00..... NCIS: Los Angeles

22:00.......... How the Rich Get Hitched

17:30..................Neighbours

13:00.............. Hawaii Five-0

18:00.... Home and Away

15:00...................... The Flash

23:00................. Christian Louboutin: The World’s Most Luxurious Shoes

18:30...... 5 News Tonight

16:00.............. Hawaii Five-0

19:00.......................Police Interceptors

17:00 .............The Simpsons

20:00..............I Want That Wedding!

18:00 ..... Modern Family

19:00 .... Channel 4 News 20:00 ...............Obsessive Compulsive Cleaners 21:00................Educating Cardiff

00:05...............Pokerstars Caribbean Adventure 01:00...........KOTV Boxing Weekly 01:30.................... Gillette World Sport 01:55............Long Course Weekend

21:00...........Celebrity Big Brother 22:00................ The Hotel Inspector Returns 23:00...........Celebrity Big Brother’s Bit on the Side 00:00....... The Nightmare Neighbour Next Door 00:55..........Super Casino

07:00 ......Sun, Sea and A&E

17:30 ...........Modern Family 18:30 ....... The Simpsons 20:00 ............A League of Their Own 21:00........ 50 Ways to Kill Your Mammy 22:00.. Stop, Search, Seize 23:00 ........ Hawaii Five-0 00:00 .NCIS: Los Angeles 01:00 ........ Hawaii Five-0

10:00.....Location, Location, Location 11:05............. Hugh’s 3 Good Things 11:15........... The Moonraker 12:55....................Time Team 14:00.................... Come Dine with Me 16:40... A Place in the Sunn 18:50...... George Clarke’s Amazing Spaces 19:55....... Grand Designs 21:00.....Penelope Keith’s Hidden Villages 22:00. The Naked Village 23:05......... Embarrassing Bodies 00:10................. Ramsay’s Hotel Hell 01:05.....Penelope Keith’s Hidden Villages

06:15.........Football Gold 06:30.........Football Gold 06:45.........Football Gold 07:00.. WWE SmackDown! 08:00........... Soccer A.M. The Best Bits 09:00...... Premier League 100 Club 09:30......SPFL Round Up 10:00............ Elite League Speedway 12:00...... Premier League 100 Club 12:30......SPFL Round Up 13:00.... Soccer A.M. - The Best Bits 14:00........ Challenge Cup Final Highlights 15:00...... US Open Tennis Highlights 16:00....U.S. Open Tennis 00:00....U.S. Open Tennis

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New Tricks BBC1, 21:00

Drama about a team of retired detectives investigating unsolved crimes. With Sasha back on fighting form, UCOS investigate the death of a talented cricket prodigy: star of the pitch and apple of his father’s eye yet loathed by his team mates. The death was recorded as misadventure, but with new evidence pointing to infighting, over-zealous autograph hunters and extra-marital affairs, UCOS are soon bowled over by the list of potential murder suspects. Wise to Steve’s monetary problems, Danny appoints himself as personal financial advisor and enforces a strict no-frills, no-fun budget. But even with this distraction, he can’t escape his own worries about revealing his relationship with Fiona to his ex-wife. Sasha cracks down on the boys’ lacklustre fitness and reluctance to come to the ‘cursed’ Mum and Dad’s Do.


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TV Guide

28th August - 3rd September 2015

W ednesday 06:00 ...................... Breakfast 09:15 .............Wanted Down Under Revisited 10:0......... Homes Under the Hammer 11:00...........Don’t Get Done, Get Dom 11:30.........Countryside 999 12:15.............. Bargain Hunt 13:00...... BBC News at One 13:45......................... Doctors 14:15........................ The Link 15:00 ...............Escape to the Country 15:45................Oxford Street Revealed 16:30 ...........................Flog It! 17:15....................... Pointless 18:00 .... BBC News at Six 19:00....... The One Show 19:30.... Pound Shop Wars 20:00.... The Great British Bake Off 21:00........Kolkata with W C Sue Perkins choice 22:00.... BBC News at Ten 22:35..............A Question of Sport 23:05.....Mountain Goats 23:35........... Into the Sun 01:15...... Weather for the Week Ahead

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06:00....... Homes Under the Hammer 07:00...........Don’t Get Done, Get Dom 07:30 ........Countryside 999 08:15 .......................See Hear 08:45 ................ Claimed and Shamed 09:15... Victoria Derbyshire 11:00 .....................BBC News 12:00 ........ My Life in Books 12:30 .................Britain’s First Photo Album 13:00.... The Rockford Files 13:45 ...Yes, Prime Minister 14:45..................... ‘Allo, ‘Allo! 15:45....... Penguins - Spy in the Huddle 16:45..................Great British Railway Journeys 17:15... Antiques Roadshow 18:00 .................Eggheads 18:30.... Terry and Mason’s Great Food Trip 19:00...... The Farmer and the Food Chain 19:30.. Great British Menu 20:00.................. Horizon 21:00...........The Ascent W C of Woman choice 22:00............................ QI 22:30..............Newsnight

06:00 ............ Good Morning Britain 08:30 ........................ Lorraine 09:25 ...................The Jeremy Kyle Show 10:30.............. This Morning 12:30............ Loose Women 13:30.............. ITV News and Weather 14:00 ................... Dickinson’s Real Deal 15:00.............. Tipping Point 16:00........... Hello Campers 17:00.................... The Chase 18:00 ................ ITV News London 18:30 .........ITV News and Weather 19:00............ Emmerdale 19:30..Coronation Street 20:00........ You Saw Them Here First 21:00 ................ The Nick 22:00 ..... ITV News at Ten and Weather 22:40 ............. The Chase: Celebrity Special 23:40 .......... Wild Ireland 00:10........... Jackpot247

The Ascent Of Woman: Civilisation BBC2, 21.00

Biographer and historian Dr. Amanda Foreman presents a landmark four-part BBC Two series on the history of women from the dawn of civilisation to the modern day. This ambitious series sets out to redress a significant imbalance in global history, exploring the extraordinary and often overlooked role that women have played in the forging of the modern world. In the first part, she explores how the earliest civilisations dealt with the roles of women, and in doing so asks some profound questions about the legacy of gender inequality they’ve left behind. Tackling many of the subjects she believes have been ignored by traditional history, Amanda investigates the origins of patriarchy, the silencing of women, the rise of the veil, the truth behind the Amazons, and the possibility of female agency in the ancient world. In Anatolia Amanda visits one of the world’s earliest settlements, Catalhöyük, a place which archaeologists believe held remarkably different notions of gender and where men and women lived in relative equality. From Mesopotamia she uncovers the world’s first law codes written to regulate women’s status and behaviour, where Amanda holds the 3,000 year-old Assyrian law tablet recognised as introducing the world’s first known veiling law for women - two millennia before the advent of Islam. Across Europe and the Near East, Amanda finds a group of extraordinary women who created their own routes to power in male-dominated worlds, including Enheduanna, the world’s first recorded author; and Hatshepsut, one of ancient Egypt’s most successful, but most maligned ruling Queens. Crucially, she also explores the darker legacy of gender inequality in ancient Greece, whose influential ideas on the inferiority of women have cast a long shadow over women’s lives across the globe to this day.


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TV Guide

28th August - 3rd September 2015

ednesday 2 nd S epte m ber

06:00................. Countdown

06:00............. The Wotwots!

06:45.......................... Draw it!

06:10 .................Igam Ogam

07:10...........King of Queens

06:20 .Lily’s Driftwood Bay

07:35.......... King of Queens

06:30 .............. Fireman Sam

08:00........ Everybody Loves Raymond

06:40 ................Toot the Tiny Tugboat

08:30.........Everybody Loves Raymond

06:50 .....................Peppa Pig

09:00............................ Frasier

07:10 ............. Little Princess

09:30............................ Frasier 10:00..................For the Love of Cars 11:00......... Undercover Boss Australia 12:00.......... Channel 4 News Summary 12:05.................... Come Dine with Me 13:05............. Three in a Bed 14:10 .................Countdown 15:00.............Fifteen to One 16:00.......French Collection 17:00.................... Come Dine with Me 18:00........ The Simpsons 18:30............... Hollyoaks 19:00..... Channel 4 News 20:00..............Posh Pawn 21:00...... One Born Every Minute 22:00............Katie Piper’s Extraordinary Births

06:55...................... Pip Ahoy! 07:20.......... Bob the Builder 07:35 ..........................Thomas and Friends 07:50 ......Noddy in Toyland 08:00........... Ben and Holly’s Little Kingdom 08:15 .....................Peppa Pig 08:25 .....................Peppa Pig 08:30... Milkshake Monkey 08:35 .........Toby’s Travelling Circus 08:45.....................Bananas in Pajamas 08:55...Milkshake! Bop Box

11:10 ........ Beware! Cowboy Builders Abroad 12:10 ....5 News Lunchtime 12:15 ................ Celebrity Big Brother 13:15 ........Home and Away 13:45 .................Neighbours 14:15 ............................... NCIS

17:30 .................Neighbours 18:00.... Home and Away 18:30..... 5 News Tonight 19:00..... The World Trade Center: Rebuilt 20:00....... The Nightmare Neighbour Next Door

00:35...........The Last Leg 01:30......... Embarrassing Bodies

01:15 ..............The Strain

01:05............Four Rooms

06:00 ......... Are You Smarter Than a 10 Year Old? 07:00 ......Sun, Sea and A&E 08:00....Chris and Wes: Let’s Do This 09:00 ......................The Flash 10:00 ..............Hawaii Five-0 12:00 ..... NCIS: Los Angeles 13:00 ..............Hawaii Five-0 15:00...................... The Flash 16:00 ..............Hawaii Five-0 17:00............. The Simpsons 17:30 ...........Modern Family 18:30 ....... The Simpsons 19:00 ....... The Simpsons 20:00 .......... Desi Rascals 21:00.... An Idiot Abroad 22:00............... The Force: Manchester 23:00......... Hawaii Five-0 00:00......... Hawaii Five-0 01:50......... Hawaii Five-0

07:00.................... Rocket City Rednecks

06:00 ............. Football Gold

07:00 .........Motorway Cops 08:00............... Real Rescues 09:00 .............. Border Patrol 10:00 .......................... The Bill 11:00 ..............Tipping Point 12:00 .....Emergency Bikers 13:00............... Real Rescues

08:55............George Clarke’s Amazing Spaces 10:00.......................Jamie’s 15 Minute Meals 10:35............Kirstie’s Vintage Gems 10:55.. Warlords of Atlantis 12:55....................Time Team

14:00.............. Border Patrol

14:00.................... Come Dine with Me

15:00 ..............Tipping Point

16:40......A Place in the Sun

16:00 .......................... The Bill

17:45......A Place in the Sun

17:00 .....Emergency Bikers 18:00 ...........Doctor Who

18:50...... George Clarke’s Amazing Spaces

19:00 .... Motorway Cops

19:55....... Grand Designs

20:00 ............ The Glades

21:00............Four Rooms

21:00 ..............The Strain

22:00...... 8 Out of 10 Cats Does Countdown

22:15 ..............The Strain 23:20 ............Paranormal Witness 00:20.................. Haunted Highway

23:05......... Embarrassing Bodies 00:05................. Ramsay’s Hotel Hell

09:15 ........ The Wright Stuff

17:00 5 News at 5

00:05..............Music on 4

06:10 ................ Doctor Who

09:00....................Tickety Toc

15:15 .....Reluctant Witness

23:00................Educating Cardiff

06:00 ........... Totally Bonkers Guinness World Records 06:20............................. Psych 07:05 ..................Emmerdale 08:10...You’ve Been Framed! 08:35.................. Dinner Date 09:35.............................. Psych 10:25..........................The Real Housewives of Atlanta 12:10...................Emmerdale 13:15 ................. You’ve Been Framed! 13:40 ................ Dinner Date 14:40 .............. Judge Rinder 15:40................... The Jeremy Kyle Show 19:00............ You’ve Been Framed! 20:00............... Two and a Half Men 21:00........... Through the Keyhole 22:00............. Pitch Black 00:15................Safeword

21:00...........Celebrity Big Brother 22:00... Wentworth Prison 23:00...........Celebrity Big Brother’s Bit on the Side 00:00..........Skinny Brides to Fat Wives

07:25 .......................Top Gear

07:00 ............................... WWE Experience

08:15 .................... Scrapheap Challenge

08:00 .........Fantasy Football Club Highlights

09:00 ...... American Pickers

08:30 ......... Premier League

10:00 .... Lizard Lick Towing

09:00 ........Soccer A.M. - The Best Bits

11:00 ........ Storage Hunters 11:30 ........ Storage Hunters 12:00 .......................Top Gear 13:00....................... Top Gear 14:00 .................... Scrapheap Challenge 15:00 ...... American Pickers 16:00....................... Top Gear 18:00 ..............Scrapheap Challenge 19:00...American Pickers 20:00....................... QI XL

10:00 .........Fantasy Football Club Highlights 10:30 ......... Premier League 11:00 .........Barclays Premier League Review 12:00 ............................La Liga World 2015 12:30..........Fantasy Football Club Highlights 13:00 ..................The Premier League Years

21:00...............Room 101

15:00........... US Open Tennis Highlights

22:20............ Taskmaster

16:00........ U.S. Open Tennis

23:20...... Mock the Week

00:00........ U.S. Open Tennis

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Kolkata With Sue Perkins BBC1, 21.00

Sue Perkins immerses herself in the complex life of Kolkata and explores the city’s teeming streets, to understand how it has become one of the most exciting places on Earth. She sees first-hand how it has evolved from a place notorious for its fabled ‘Black Hole’ dungeon and the dreadful poverty of its street people, to a place reinventing itself as a vibrant new megacity, with a booming property sector and a reputation for eccentricity, culture and tolerance. In this intricate human habitat Sue will explore the lives of its people, from the homeless street kids hustling for a living to the wealthy young entrepreneurs who race their Ferraris and Lamborghinis down the streets of the New Town. She joins the rickshaw wallahs navigating the chaotic city streets and narrow lanes, thronged with people, and descends into Kolkata’s Victorian sewers as part of an epic clean up. She limbers up with the ladies of the Laughing Club and makes an offering to the Goddess in the sacred Kalighat Temple.


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TV Guide

28th August - 3rd September 2015

T h ursday 06:00 ...................... Breakfast 09:15 .............Wanted Down Under Revisited 10:00...... Homes Under the Hammer 11:00...........Don’t Get Done, Get Dom 11:30 ........Countryside 999 12:15 .............. Bargain Hunt 13:00 ...... BBC News at One 13:30 ....BBC London News 13:45 .........................Doctors 14:15 ........................The Link 15:00 ...............Escape to the Country 15:45................Oxford Street Revealed 16:30 ...........................Flog It! 17:15 .......................Pointless 18:00 .... BBC News at Six 19:00....... The One Show 19:30............. EastEnders 20:00... Eat Well for Less? 21:00 ........... Who Do You Think You Are? 22:00.... BBC News at Ten 22:35 ......... Parking Mad 23:35 .The Unbreakables: Life and Love on Disability Campus

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06:00 ...... Homes Under the Hammer 07:00 ..........Don’t Get Done, Get Dom 07:30........ Countryside 999 08:15 ...........The House That £100k Built 09:15... Victoria Derbyshire 11:00 .....................BBC News 12:00 ........ My Life in Books 12:30 .................Britain’s First Photo Album 13:00 .... The Rockford Files 13:45 ...Yes, Prime Minister 14:45..................... ‘Allo, ‘Allo! 15:45....... Penguins - Spy in the Huddle 16:45....Great British Railway Journeys 17:15.Antiques Roadshow 18:00............... Eggheads 18:30 ....Terry and Mason’s Great Food Trip 19:00...... The Farmer and the Food Chain 19:30.Great British Menu 20:00.... World’s Weirdest Events W 21:00...Cradle to Grave Coice ch 21:30 ...... Boy Meets Girl 22:00 ....... Country Strife 22:30............. Newsnight 23:15.................. Horizon

06:00 ............ Good Morning Britain 08:30......................... Lorraine 09:25 ......... The Jeremy Kyle Show 10:30.............. This Morning 12:30............ Loose Women 13:30.............. ITV News and Weather 14:00.................... Dickinson’s Real Deal 15:00.............. Tipping Point 16:00........... Hello Campers 17:00 ....................The Chase 18:00................. ITV News London 18:30......... ITV News and Weather 19:00 ........... Emmerdale 20:00 .............Coronation Street 20:30.............. Flockstars 21:00....Stephen Fry in Central America

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22:00 ..... ITV News at Ten and Weather 22:40..........Peter Shilton: Sports Life Stories 23:40................... Murder, She Wrote

Cradle To Grave BBC2, 21.00

It’s 1974 and 15 year-old Danny is our guide through the ups and downs of life with the Baker family. With eldest daughter Sharon’s wedding looming and the docks facing closure, times are challenging. So too are Danny’s attempts to get closer to the opposite sex. Full of humour, warmth and drama Cradle To Grave is based on actual events and characters. Dad Fred (Peter Kay) is known to all and sundry as Spud, a proud South London docker with a penchant for rackets, fiddles and schemes. His wife Bet (Lucy Speed) loves him deeply but longs for the day when they do quaint things - like put money in the electricity meter. Then there’s Danny’s older brother Michael (Frankie Wilson), with his modish and much mocked head attire, and sister Sharon (Alice Sykes) who with her plimsole-wearing boyfriend is about to take Danny to the theatre for a West End experience he will never forget. Throw in a coveted item of clothing, a rogue tortoise and an early brush with death and it’s business as usual at 11 Debnams Rd.


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TV Guide

28th August - 3rd September 2015

35 CW

3 rd septe m ber CW oice ch

06:00 .................Countdown

06:00............. The Wotwots!

06:45 ......................... Draw it!

06:10 .................Igam Ogam

07:10 ..........King of Queens

06:20 ................................ Lily’s Driftwood Bay

07:35 ..........King of Queens 08:00 ........Everybody Loves Raymond 08:30.........Everybody Loves Raymond

06:30.............. Fireman Sam 06:40................ Toot the Tiny Tugboat 06:50 .....................Peppa Pig

09:00 ........................... Frasier

06:55 ......................Pip Ahoy!

09:30 ........................... Frasier

07:10 ............. Little Princess

10:00 .................For the Love of Cars

07:20 ..........Bob the Builder

11:00 ........ Undercover Boss Australia 12:00......... Channel 4 News Summary 12:05 ................... Come Dine with Me 13:05............. Three in a Bed 14:10................. Countdown 15:00............ Fifteen to One 16:00 ......French Collection 17:00 ................... Come Dine with Me 18:00 ....... The Simpsons 18:30 .............. Hollyoaks 19:00 .... Channel 4 News 20:00 ................ Location, Location, Location 21:00.....................Jamie’s Sugar Rush Ten years after tackling the dire state of Britain’s school dinners, Jamie Oliver is back on the campaign trail, investigating the huge contribution sugar is making to rising global health problems and asking what can be done about it. Experts warn that excess sugar is as dangerous as alcohol and tobacco, contributing to huge rises in obesity and type 2 diabetes, which ruin millions of lives and threaten to bankrupt the NHS. The experts recommend a daily limit of seven teaspoons of sugar. Jamie meets people suffering the devastating effects of type 2 diabetes, including leg amputation. He talks to a teenager diagnosed with type 2 diabetes at just 13 and meets a consultant dentist who frequently has to remove milk and adult teeth from primary school children.

22:00 ..... 8 Out of 10 Cats Does Countdown 23:05............... The Catch

07:35 ..........................Thomas and Friends 07:50...... Noddy in Toyland 08:00 ........... Ben and Holly’s Little Kingdom 08:15..................... Peppa Pig 08:25..................... Peppa Pig 08:35 .........Toby’s Travelling Circus 08:45 ....................Bananas in Pajamas 09:00 ...................Tickety Toc

06:00 ........... Totally Bonkers Guinness World Records 06:20 ............................. Psych 07:05 ..................Emmerdale 07:35..... Coronation Street 08:10 ................. You’ve Been Framed! 08:35 ................ Dinner Date 09:35 ............................. Psych 10:25 .........................The Real Housewives of Atlanta 12:10 ..................Emmerdale 12:40 .....Coronation Street 13:15.................. You’ve Been Framed! 13:40.................. Dinner Date 14:40 .............. Judge Rinder 15:40 ...................The Jeremy Kyle Show 19:00 ......... The Best Ever You’ve Been Framed 20:00................Two and a Half Men 21:00 ........ Hell’s Kitchen 22:00................Safeword

11:10 ........ Beware! Cowboy Builders 12:15 ................ Celebrity Big Brother 13:15 ........Home and Away 13:45 .................Neighbours 14:15 ............................... NCIS 15:15 ........Stolen Daughter 17:00 ..................5 News at 5

07:25 ................. Traffic Cops 08:25 ...............Real Rescues 09:30.............. Border Patrol 10:00.......................... The Bill 11:00 ..............Tipping Point 12:00..... Emergency Bikers 13:00 ...............Real Rescues 14:00 .............. Border Patrol 14:30 .............. Border Patrol 15:00 ..............Tipping Point 16:00 .......................... The Bill 17:00 .............. Border Patrol 17:35................ Doctor Who 19:00........ Tipping Point 20:00 ........... Traffic Cops

10:10...... Reach for the Sky 12:55....................Time Team 14:00 ................... Come Dine with Me 14:35 ................... Come Dine with Me 15:05 ................... Come Dine with Me 15:40................... Come Dine with Me 16:10 ................... Come Dine with Me 16:40 .....A Place in the Sun 17:45 .....A Place in the Sun 18:50...... George Clarke’s Amazing Spaces

22:00 ...... Beauty and the Beast

19:55...... Grand Designs 21:00............ Atonement

23:00.............Paranormal Witness

23:20 ........ Embarrassing Bodies

06:00 ......... Are You Smarter Than a 10 Year Old?

07:00 ................... Rocket City Rednecks

07:00 ......Sun, Sea and A&E

07:20 .......................Top Gear

08:00..............Chris and Wes: Let’s Do This

08:10 .................... Scrapheap Challenge

08:30..............Chris and Wes: Let’s Do This

09:00....... American Pickers

09:00 ......................The Flash

11:00......... Storage Hunters

10:00..... Lizard Lick Towing

17:30 .................Neighbours 18:00...................... Home and Away

11:00 ..............Hawaii Five-0 12:00 ..... NCIS: Los Angeles

18:30..... 5 News Tonight

13:00 ..............Hawaii Five-0

14:00..................... Scrapheap Challenge

19:00..........Underground Britain

14:00 ..............Hawaii Five-0

15:00....... American Pickers

15:00 ......................The Flash

16:00........................Top Gear

20:00........ Murdering the Mother-in-Law

16:00.............. Hawaii Five-0

17:00........................Top Gear

21:00 ..........Celebrity Big Brother

17:00 .............The Simpsons 17:30 ...........Modern Family

18:00...............Scrapheap Challenge

23:00...........Celebrity Big Brother’s Bit on the Side

10:00 ...River Cottage Bites

21:00 ..... One Born Every Minute

10:00 ..............Hawaii Five-0

22:00............. The Special Needs Hotel

08:55 ...........George Clarke’s Amazing Spaces

09:15 ........ The Wright Stuff

12:10 ....5 News Lunchtime

06:15 ................ Doctor Who

18:30 ....... The Simpsons 20:00...... Modern Family 21:00................. The Man 22:40..NCIS: Los Angeles 23:40 ........ Hawaii Five-0

12:00........................Top Gear 13:00........................Top Gear

19:00...American Pickers 20:00....................... QI XL 22:00...... Mock the Week 22:40...... Mock the Week 23:20...... Mock the Week

06:00 ............. Football Gold 07:00....WWE SmackDown! 08:00 .......... Premier League 100 Club 08:30 ......... Premier League 09:00 .................. Boots ‘n’ All 10:00 .........Barclays Premier League Review 11:00 .......... Premier League 100 Club 11:30.......... Premier League Legends 12:30........... Premier League Legends 13:00 .................. Boots ‘n’ All 14:00.................. The Premier League Years 16:00 .................. Boots ‘n’ All 16:55 ...........UEFA European Championship Qualifier 19:00.......UEFA European Championship Qualifier 22:30... NFL Hard Knocks 23:30...La Liga Show 2015

Stephen Fry in Central America ITV1, 21.00

In episode two, Stephen’s journey continues through Belize and Guatemala. Belize is the only country in Central America to have been a British colony. It has English as its official language and the Queen is head of state. At Wildtracks Animal Rescue Centre in Belize City, Stephen learns how to bottle-feed an injured baby manatee before meeting up with the last vestiges of the British Army. The garrison used to house 1500 troops but now Commanding Officer Major Caine has just six men to command and the next defense review may close them altogether. Stephen heads onto Turneffe, some 40-miles off the mainland, to meet a latter day Robinson Crusoe called Alan, who has found the lifestyle there has served as rehabilitaion from his drug addiction. Others who have sought sanctuary in these remote islands are the famed red-footed boobie birds who Stephen finds nesting on Half Moon Caye.


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What’s On Tenerife

28th August - 3rd September 2015

Tom Jones in Concert ‘The Voice’ star and music legend Tom Jones performs a one off gig in Santa Cruz. He will play all the hits from a glittering career.

Sansofé 2015 The 22nd Folk Fair, the 9th Talents Festival and the 15th Canoe Regatta are just some of the items that can be found in the programme, along with concerts, outdoor cinema, gastronomic and sport events, puppet shows, inflatable castles, parades and workshops for kids.

When: Friday 28th August Where: Recinto Ferial Santa Cruz More details: tenerifesunshine.com

When: Until August 31 Where: El Medano and Los Abrigos, Granadilla de Abona More info: www.granadilladeabona.org

Santa Cruz museum of fine arts This museum consists of 14 rooms and the collection is made up mainly of paintings, although there are also exhibits of sculptures and of the lesser arts. It has both its own pieces and a deposit of the works of the Prado Museum in Madrid from the 17th, 18th and 19th centuries.

Where: C/ Jose Murphy, 12 Plaza del Principe in Santa Cruz When: Tuesday to Friday, from 10:00 to 20:00h Saturday and Sunday from 10:00 to 15:00h (Monday closed). More details: 922 274786

Dorada Brewery Tour The local beer company opens its doors to unveil the manufacturing process of Dorada beer, from the collection of raw materials to bottling. It’s a guided tour through the facilities, explaining each stage of the brewing process. And at the end of the visit you will be invited to a Dorada or two in the Tasting Room. Booking is highly recommended.

When: Every Tuesday Where: Avenida de Ángel Romero in Santa Cruz More info: doradatour.es

Monje wine tour

Tegueste Tour Enjoy the scenery and explore the history of the town of Tegueste via over 30 thematic routes that take place throughout the year. Specialised guides will show you the most beautiful scenery of the town, its historical, artistic and archaeological heritage and, of course, vineyards and everything related to its great wine tradition. There are hiking trails, dramatised routes that will transport you to the past or night routes for a unique experience under the moon.

When: Every Day More Info www.tegueste.org

Visit the Monje Winery and test the wine and gastronomy of Tenerife. The landscape all around the winery is a delight to behold: vineyards, mountains, the sea and the sun. It is a perfect spot to live and nurture our wines. Built in 1956, the winery was modernised in 1983 but still holds the original oak barrels, nearly 200 years old, where the traditional red wine is left to ferment and mature. Ageold practices go hand in hand with modern-day technology. The winery accommodates all the grape harvesting requirements with its capacity to hold 160,000 litres.

Where: El Sauzal When: Every day from 10am More details: www.bodegasmonje.com


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Entertainment

28th August - 3rd September 2015

37 CW

Butlins in Tenerife By Jamie Droo NOT so long ago, I wrote about audiences being very entertaining and, sometimes, as entertaining as the paid artistes who ply their trade as performers. This week, I must tell the story of 12-year-old Harvey Butlin, who has become somewhat of a celebrity in the Fañabe area. Harvey suffers with a syndrome called Asperger’s Syndrome, which is associated with an autism spectrum disorder, characterised by the difficulties of interacting with other people, alongside restricted and repetitive behavioural patterns. This young man understands his condition, and his story should inspire anyone who has had any experience of autism or, indeed, any area of difficulty regarding mental illness or disorders. As a compere, I have encountered many types of people who suffer with such difficulties and I have had to deal with those challenges as they arise. But I have never witnessed what happened this week with Harvey in any other circumstances. This inspirational young boy managed to bring people to tears with what happened spontaneously this week during his family holiday. First of all, I must say that I rarely write about incidents that happen in the bar where I am the resident compere. But this really needs a little attention. When Harvey first approached me on the stage to put in a request to sing, I had a feeling he was autistic, simply from previous experience with the disability. After first song his father, Chris, came over

for a chat and told me about Harvey’s condition. From then on, I took quite a shine to the youngster, whose effortless ability engaged the crowd. And I did my best to encourage this as it added to the entertainment factor with the audience. They loved him, and he had a natural ability which everyone tuned in to instantly. On the second night of their family holiday, I decided to make a bit of a fuss and, in a comedic way, I said to the audience that for every person who gave Harvey a standing ovation, his dad would give him a pound. Well nobody expected what happened next. At the end of the song Harvey started receiving money from almost everyone in the audience. In total, he was given 160 euros from

the public. Later that night Chris, who was o v e r whelmed and brought to tears at the support given to his son, told me that Harvey had previously been very withdrawn and would never have displayed such personality on stage. In the past, he had taken part in karaoke, but would always sing on stage when it was his turn, and then sit down and return to his own secluded world. This time, however, the audience seemed to bring him out a little and, as every day of their holiday passed, this little boy’s confidence and ability to engage the audience grew and grew. Each and every night, I related the story about the 160 euros given to Harvey to people in the bar The turning point of this whole story came when his father told me that the family would match the money given to Harvey by generous members of the audience and donate it to charity. The particular organisation in question was

the STARS charity, which works alongside the National Autism Society UK for the development of children just like Harvey. On announcing this to customers, more donations came flooding in, which prompted Harvey to get up on stage and give a heartfelt speech, thanking everyone for the support. He said, simply: “My name is Harvey Butlin and I have Asperger’s. Thank you to everyone for the money you have donated to raise awareness for my condition.” This immediately brought several members of the audience to tears, including his mother and father. You had to be there. This little boy had gone

from a withdrawn kid with social difficulties to a celebrity in the blink of an eye. Some people don’t like karaoke. But for this young man with an obsession for the music of world-famous rock band Queen, this holiday has been a turning point in his development, and the day-to-day dealings with his Asperger’s Syndrome. Every night that went by, for the duration of their holiday, the Butlin family began receiving donations for their chosen charity. The sum collected amounted to so much that it prompted Harvey’s dad to start a Just Giving Page on Social Networks in order to

officiate the moneys received. As we go to press, the figure raised by Harvey’s performances has reached almost 900 euros,which will be matched by the company which employs Chris. This is an amazing achievement. And the STARS charity will benefit greatly thanks to a 12-year -boy and his personality. There is a Facebook page you may want to visit. Just search for Harvey’s fun pub fan club page. You will be able to see videos and status updates of just how much of an impact this young man has made. Also there are links to the “just giving” page, should you wish to donate.


CW 38

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Wine and Dine

28th August - 3rd September 2015

Lupita Parque de la Reina has a secret - Lupita restaurant is fast becoming the place to eat, and it has a well-deserved reputation. All the usual Mexican specialities are on offer, but from midday until 4pm, check out its 3.95-euro menu. You can have a bowl of soup or garlic bread, main meal (selection of 20) and ice cream or coffee to finish, which is excellent value for money. Also, evening and weekend menus are available from 4.95-euro. Now Open Mondays!

FREE 1/2ltr Margarita when 2 people dine from the A La Carte menu! Cañada Blanca 2, Parque de la Reina

Open: daily, 12noon - 11.30pm

Call: 922 739 250 The Swan

The Bistro

Fresh food served 7 days a week, all with good quality produce. We also cater for any special requirements.

Bistro Restaurant is now open for lunch, serving the most famous pies, sausage rolls, quiches, sandwiches and different specials every day. All homemade and freshly baked, plus drinks offers every lunchtime including local wine at 1 euro per glass, 1.50 euros for Torres wines, 1 euro a pint and 2 euros for local spirits.

Daily Specials. Friday: Cod and chips night. Sunday Lunch: 12noon - 8pm. 24hr notice for paella, lamb shank, fillet steak or ask us for anything you fancy. Or just pop in for a drink, with live entertainment every night, 9pm - midnight, and your favourite quiz on Sunday evenings. Great entertainment, even greater value!

Ed. Florin, Calle Valle Menendez, behind the Cultural Centre, Los Cristianos

In front of Margarita Apartments, Los Cristianos

Open: Mon - Sat, midday - 4pm, 6pm - late. Sun, midday - late.

Open: 10am - Late. Food until 8pm

Call: 922 795 823

Call: 698 396 367

Niu Cafe Bar

Newly-opened cafe specialising in traditional home cooking mixed with Thai & Chinese cuisine. Our menu covers our best meals developed from over 30-years cooking experience. Free prawn crackers to every customer that dines in with us. Receive a Free drink with every food order throughout August. We cater for private parties and charity events for 10 to 50 guests. Take away available - phone in your order and get a free beer whilst you wait. Delivery coming soon!

Calle Oregon, Los Cristianos (opposite La Pepa food market)

Open: Mon-Sat, 9am-10pm

Call: 922 087 282

Belgabar Belgabar has very quickly become a favourite for diners. Our selective menu includes the finest prime steak, fresh seafood and vegetable dishes and a tropical dining experience not to be missed. There is an extensive wine menu, which includes local produce, and a range of international beers. Belgabar menu is popular, so reservations are recommended. You must try the house special!

Open 7 days a week Every day (9am - 5pm) For breakfasts, lunches, snacks & cakes. Beer, wine, spirits, coffee & a proper pot of tea.

BBQ Wednesday Nights (6pm to last orders 9pm) Don’t like BBQs? - Full menu available. (booking strongly advised)

Every Sunday (12noon - 6pm) Traditional Sunday Roast - Beef - Chicken - Pork

Every Friday Best ‘Cod & Chips’ with our own beer batter

Beachfront, The Patch, Las Americas, next to Burger King

*Try our Homemade liqueur ice-creams

Open: 12pm til late

Pueblo Canario, Las Americas

Call: 674 578 413

Call: 603 153 580

* Try our Sangria - one of the best on the island * Try our home-made cakes & desserts - baked on the premises

barraquito A traditional after dinner drink that is particular only to Tenerife. Cut out this advert & try a FREE barraquito for yourself.


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Wine and Dine

28th August - 3rd September 2015

39 CW

Tasty treat for Burger Week HOW often have you ordered a burger in a cafe, only to be served with a thin, tasteless slab of mince and a tiny slice of onion, stuck in a washy-washy roll?

Ring a bell? Of course it does! Now, though, a leading food scientist claims to have created the perfect burger - and

says that its smell and feel are more important than the taste. According to Oxford University chef Charles Michel, who is also a “food perception expert”, the best burgers are 7cm tall, 5cm wide and boast nine layers. Michel, a leading food scientist and chef-inresidence at the University’s Crossmodal Research Laboratory, also maintains that eating a burger is a “multi-sensory experi-

The Palms Pool Bar & Restaurant The Most Beautiful Cabaret Bar on Golf del Sur. “HOME OF CRAIGS CREATIONS” Lots of Traditional Dishes plus Imaginative, UNIQUE, and EXCITING CUISINE for you to enjoy! NEW SUMMER CABARET 9pm Monday – The Commitments Tuesday – Ronnie J Haynes Wednesday – Dave Michaels and The Jersey Boys Friday – the Memphis Belles Call in or check boards for Cabaret Specials! PLUS YOU FAVOURITES: Monday, Thursday & Saturday Dales Quiz and Karaoke Nights. Wednesday & Saturday - Fun Bingo 4.30 & 6.30`pm Sunday - Jon G as Wet Wet Wet Tipsy Time Daily 4-7pm 1.50 euros - Large Draught Lager 1.50 euros - Large House Wine 2.50 euros - Local Spirit & Draught Mixer

Palms Pool bar and Restaurant, Golf Del Sur

Call: 679 721 005 / 667 098 126 / 922 738 809

ence” and, to maximise enjoyment, should never be served on a plate, or with cutlery. His scientific recipe for success is that 30% of a burger’s appeal lies in its smell, 25% in its feel and 15% in how it looks and the sound made eating it. How the burger actually tastes in the mouth accounts for the remaining 15%, he claimed. Michel, who has worked in Michelinstarred restaurants, is an expert in gastrophysics, a growing field of science analysing how we interact with our food. The nine layers from top to bottom of Michel’s perfect burger are: *Warmed seeded-burger bread, sprayed with sesame seed oil *Chipotle sauce *Crunchy lettuce and sliced gherkin *Juicy, vine-ripened tomato *Crunchy slices of serrano ham and deep-fried onion

*Slices of melted, Camembert cheese *Patty of Wagyu beef, seasoned with BBQ sauce, salt, pepper and finely-chopped onion *Ketchup sauce *Lower bread, splashed with soy sauce Chef Michel says that warmed burger bread combines with a Wagyu beef patty for the ideal

aroma that “directly hits nostrils”. The aroma of fresh, high-quality ingredients, plus fat in the beef, optimise expectation of a delicious treat to come. The burger should always be held in wrapping, rather than on a plate with cutlery, he said. The feeling of a soft,

warm bun in the hand improves perception of taste in the mouth, while wrapping maintains structure, moisture and heat until the last bite. Michel said that we eat with our eyes and our ears, just as much as with our mouths, and that the initial look of a juicy burger in attractive surroundings can boost the enjoyment. Also, the crisp sound of wrapping, sizzling of the patty, crunchiness of bacon, ham, lettuce, onion and gherkin and good background music all enhance the eating experience. He adds that the perfect burger’s texture on the tongue is 30% umami, a Japanese word that describes a meaty or savoury taste; 25% salty; 20% sweet; 15% sour; and 5% bitter. Michel also said that giving a burger a colourful name like a “Big Mac” enhances enjoyment by building expectation of what is to come.

Rumours A friendly bar serving fabulous home-made English food with breakfast, light lunches and evening meals. Also, now famous for their Sunday lunches with a choice of meats and all fresh vegetables. The menu combines traditional with the more adventurous and truly home-made. Or maybe just stop for a drink on their sunny terrace. With entertainment nightly, including Karoke. Plus don’t miss BG´s award-winning comedy show every Saturday. At Rumours there really is something for everyone, great food great beer, great entertainment!

Paloma Beach, Los Cristianos

Open: 9am til late

Call: 922 792 608


CW 40

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Lifestyle

By Val Sainsbury SCIENTISTS have discovered that nine risk factors can be blamed for two-thirds of cases of Alzheimer’s disease, which is the most common form of dementia. Yet most of them can be avoided because they are simply down to to lifestyle, according to the University of California team’s study, published in the Journal of Neurology, Neurosurgery & Psychiatry. The risks are: * Obesity * Type 2 diabetes * Smoking * High or low blood pressure * Frailty *Depression *Low level of education *Narrow carotid arteries – major blood vessels, which supply blood to brain *High levels of a naturally-occurring amino acid, called homocysteine The chance of people over the age of 65 having dementia has decreased by almost a quarter in the last 20 years, say experts. A landmark Cambridge University study suggests that predictions of a dementia “epidemic” appear to be unfounded.

28th August - 3rd September 2015

Safeguard against dementia

The scientists say that despite the elderly population rising, the number of people with dementia has barely changed, which means the risk of having the disease is falling. Experts have assumed since the Eighties that dementia rates would soar, predicting around 820,000 Britons would have it by now. But the study found the actual figure is around 670,000 - a slight increase from the 664,000 of two decades ago, despite soaring numbers of over65s. A British pensioner’s risk of suffering dementia, therefore, fell by nearly 25% between 1991

and 2011 - from 8.3% to 6.5%. The scientists believe that dementia’s advance has been halted, thanks to medical progress and lifestyle changes. Rates of smoking, a major risk factor, have more than halved since 1974, and the prevention and treatment of high blood pressure and cholesterol, which also increase the risk of dementia, have improved. The team, led by Professor Carol Brayne, of the Cambridge Institute of Public Health, looked at data from 7,600 people in Newcastle, Cambridgeshire and Nottingham in 1991, and another 7,800 people in the same

three areas two decades later. They also examined data from other European countries, which revealed a similar trend. In Spain, there was a 43% fall in the risk of dementia in men over 65 between 1987 and 1996, and the rates also dropped in Sweden and the Netherlands. The team said that research pointing to soaring rates of dementia was outdated and that the new findings, published in this week’s Lancet Neurology journal, “present a rather different picture to the socalled dementia epidemic”. Profess o r

Brayne added: “Our upto-date evidence suggests a relatively optimistic picture of possible future trends.” Experts have welcomed the findings, but they still warn that dementia remains a serious problem. Eric Karran, of Alzhei-

mer’s Research UK, said it was “very good news because it shows medicine works”, but stressed that some risk-factors, such as obesity, are on the rise, which could push up dementia rates again. Dr Elizabeth Coulthard, a neurologist at Bristol University, said the “robust” study suggested previous predictions of dementia rates were “overblown”. But she added: “The impact of dementia is still huge, affecting around 7% of people over 65, and 40% of those over 80.”

WHO ARE YOU CALLING ‘PLUS’? By Carl Pattison

WE can talk about the “whys” and the “solutions”, but humans are getting bigger. Yet the fashion world is still in the dark ages when it comes to plussize fashion.

Few fashion stores would dare use a larger mannequin; instead, we are bombarded with unrealistic images of how we should look. The women’s section uses stick-thin models to portray clothes, with muscled torsos in the men’s department.

They are trying to sell their wares to the entire clothes-buying audience, but still insist they are draped over somewhat skeletal figures. I assume that you women, when viewing an item on one of the “dummies”, show an interest because it looks good in the window. But when you try it on, it can sometimes let you down. Why can’t clothes be displayed on models of varied shapes and height? Is it because the stores try to sell you an illusion rather than what you might really look like? The average European size is now a 16, yet this is regarded as a plus size when, clearly,

it’s a “regular” size. Many stores even take a size 14 and put insert a size 12 label just to

make you “feel” slimmer in their stores. But why should someone, male or female, be made to

feel size-conscious while they shop. Quite clearly, we have mixed skin-tone man-

nequins in most stores to show different ethnic backgrounds, so why not differentsized models in our shop windows? Stores are quite at ease when offering various sizes, from petite to large. But rarely do they display their larger sizes, for fear of what … of offending our eye, or upsetting the majority? Or perhaps they don’t want to admit that their customers are bigger than they cater for, and that shopping for a bigger person can be a nightmare. So come on retailers, take a look around. We come in all shapes and sizes, and that’s the way you should sell your clothes to us.


41 CW TIME TO BITE THE BULLET?

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Lifestyle

28th August - 3rd September 2015

Jaw-dropping thrills galore By Vanessa Vee

By Carl from Robot

HAVING friends over on holiday means lots of activities in order to entertain, and this week they wanted to sample the Siam Park experience.

“WHEN did someone last compliment you on your hair?” That’s my favourite question to some new clients. And if they have to think about it, you just know it was too long ago.

This is not a place I tend to frequent, as much as I love it, because the height restrictions for the rides mean that a lot of activities are out of bounds for my rather young children. Having purchased our tickets beforehand meant that we avoided the hustle and bustle of the gate queues and walked straight through to the turnstiles, enjoying a hassle-free entry. After passing the Sea Lion island, we made our way to the sandy beach and decided this would be our station for the day. Free sun beds and parasols are an absolute bonus! The ambience of this theme park is glorious, with mellow music played throughout the day, and dozens of people soaking up the sun, and literally having a joyous time. The park is immaculately kept, and constant maintenance is upheld throughout the day. Our first port of call is the wave palace, which boasts the largest artificial waves in the world, reaching up to three metres high, and you can jump right into them, or opt for paddling in the edges near the vast white sands. Every half an hour, you can spot everyone heading in, ready to enjoy the thrill.

For my young children, the Lost City is perfect. Uncover the secrets of this water fortress by crossing bridges, dodging waterfalls and sliding around. And joined on to this is a baby section, specially designed with youngsters in mind. For relaxation the lazy river, known as the Mai Thai River, is a must. Grab a single or a double inflatable doughnut and glide along the waters for a good 15 minutes. We collared a double and managed to get all four of us on board, with each child on our knees. There is a section which has a bit of a thrill to it, however, which is not permitted with young children. My friend’s seven-yearold son was desperate to attempt the Tower of Power but, alas, he did not make the height limit. This ride is Siam Park´s most iconic feature, and also its most jaw-dropping thrill ride.

Climb the tower, take a deep breath and hang on to your swimwear as you plunge down the almost-vertical 28-metre freefall and emerge via a mysterious aquarium. Next we head to the Volcano and The Dragon, again, amazing, thrilling rides, but not for those of nervous disposition! For these rides a quadruple inflatable is used, so you can all grasp the experience together. The Kinnaree, which uses the tag line “where fiction becomes reality”, is yet another whiteknuckle ride, along with The Giant and the Mekong Rapids. The Sawasadee is a family area of flumes and has a lower height restriction; however I would say from maybe eight years and over. The Siam Park is a wonderful day out, but if you have young children, some activities are very restricted. Thumbs-up to the cleanliness of the whole park and also the wonderful lifeguards, who are extremely vigilant and helpful. Fast-track passes can be purchased to skip the queues, and you can also purchase another day-pass for just 17 euros if you fancy a second visit. Open 365 days a year, visit www.siampark. net or visit any local excursion office or hotel reception.

So ask yourself, “When did someone last compliment me on my hair?” You can’t remember? then it’s time you thought about a change of style or colour - or both! If you’re happy that your hair isn’t so important to you, then don’t read on. While talking to a fellow stylist whom I have recently got to know, she agreed with me that things here in Tenerife sometimes can get a little stale. Some people here can get stuck in a rut easily and forget that fashion and hair fashion both change constantly. I’m always on the look-out for new styling techniques, and things that catch my eye when I’m just walking around. Stylists gather their ideas from many places - and not just from looking at other people’s work. And when it comes to a new idea, I love to experiment. But is that what you, the client, want from your stylists, or are you

happy to stick with the same thing, year in, year out? I get bored if a client sticks to a style for too long. Okay, we can change a look, but it doesn’t mean you can’t go back to what you had before. Life’s about experimenting and, as long as your stylists discusses your new look and con-

sults you BEFORE they start, what can go wrong? You may have ideas of your own, and, with your stylists, you can work together to create your new image or if you have the confidence, just leave your locks in their hands. As the clothing fashion changes so does hair. Don’t get left behind by opting for something “safe”, just because you know it works and its what you feel comfortable with. Unless you dare to try something, you’ll never know. You’ll never know if changing your colour or going for a new cut will be the best thing you ever do. So bite the bullet, as they say, and try something a little more daring. And maybe when you’re swamped with compliments, you will be glad you did.


CW 42 Little Tito after a friendly home

www.canarianweekly.com

Community News /Advertorial

LOOK at this little man, who weighs less than 6 kilos. Tito is just 10 months old and really needs a big-hearted home. Come on, you know you want to. Call Sue on 629 388 102 for more information.

We have a selection of rescue dogs needing homes, and this time of year is terrible, so if you would consider adopting one of our dogs, we will give you a friend for life. Adopt don’t buy. Plough bash off Sorry, but the planned event tomorrow (Saturday) at the Plough in Torviscas is cancelled. We felt that it was not going to be well-attended for reasons outside of our control so we have cancelled it. We take great pride in our events and like to give people a great day out. but we felt this would not reach expectations. Apologies for any inconvenience. Top Square Irish glee

Yes, it’s that time again. We are back on the Top Square - and did we ever have a bad one? Certainly not. We are working on the formula, although there may be an Irish theme as it is “Halfway to Paddy’s Day”. watch this space and, most importantly, stick it in your diaries. Our charity shops Our new charity shop on Golf del Sur continues to thrive, and our vet, Cesar Bertoldi, is with us every Wednesday morning from 10am to noon, offering advice on all aspects of your pet’s healthcare. Come and have a chat with him. We are situated at Golf Park, on the loop road before the lottery kiosk, and are open 10am4pm, Monday to Saturday. We also have shops in Los Cristianos, Calle Revron, near Churchills Bar, and in San Eugenio, opposite Hotel La Nina by Amandas bar at the Las Carabelas complex. Both shops open from 10am-4pm, Monday to Friday, and until 3pm Saturdays and Sundays.

28th August - 3rd September 2015

Home in on new Másmóvil offer HURRY! If you renew your MÁSMÓVIL payas-you-go international internet and voice bundles before 31st August, you’ll get an extra 50 minutes FREE!!

This incredible offer is available right now, so don’t delay - extend your bundle now. Just think, you can phone home and speak for 50% longer for free! Imagine calling the UK, for example, and other European destinations, or even the States or Asia and, in-

stead of speaking for 100 minutes, you can talk for 150 minutes. And prices start from only 7.5 euros. MÁSMÓVIL is offering this great summer deal as long as you contract this, or renew your existing bundle, before or on Monday (31st August). It lasts for three whole months from activation, should you wait until the end of August to do it. Don’t delay, get 50% more every time you contract more bundles between now and the end of the offer! These bundles start from as little as 7.5 euros, including tax! If you’re not already a customer of MÁSMÓVIL,

you can move your existing telephone number to us and,within a short time, be reaping the benefits of this great offer. Make sure you have no penalty clauses before you move your number to us, which, by the way, we do for you, so it’s trouble-free! With our Pay-as-yougo bundles, you can top-up your SIM card whenever you wish! Simply go to any of our distributors, or find one on our web page: www. masmovil.es or call us on our toll-free number 2373. You can be assured of transparency at MÁSMÓVIL! If there is something you don’t understand, call us

on 1473, or ask your distributor. We don’t have fixed terms or penalties, either, so you can stay with us for as long or as short as you want. For just one euro, you can even “park” your telephone number for up to six months if you happen to be travelling away from Spain. And you will not have to pay your monthly fees while you’re away. When you return, we reactivate your number; all so simple. Go to: <http://www. masmovil.es/int/ratesprepaid/> for all the information on our bundles and how to get this 50% extra promotional offer.

Our dreadlocked MANY dogs brought into the refuge from our streets by Protection Civil arrive with matted fur, some almost resembling dreadlocks. So our nominated dog-groomer has been extremely busy, especially in

the last week with the arrival of so many animals. We are now operating at full capacity and really would appreciate any help you can offer. We are still anxiously seeking people flying to Germany who would kindly help escort a dog for adoption. All that’s needed is a little bit of your time at the airport. All nec-

essary paperwork and handling of the dogs is sorted out by staff from our sponsors, German charity Aktion Tier. Please contact us on 922 778 630 if you are travelling to Germany and would like to help give a dog a new start in life. Nikki’s charity knack Digital artist Nikki Attree, who has supported Accion del Sol


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Community News

28th August - 3rd September 2015

43 CW

Thomson-Tui bonanza for the Helping Hands

W E D N E S DAY ’ S annual ThomsonTUI charity event at Vivo was another massive success for the group, with a total of over 7,500 euros raised for local charity Helping Hands.

It came via a sponsored walk, a large raffle, bucket donations, food sales and pledges, which included organiser Andy Joyce and host Amir Guezaiel being gunged! There was entertainment all afternoon, the highlights provided by the HV duo and the sixpiece TUI group from Sensatori, who brought the house down. The event was broadcast live on Oasis Fm. Roll on next year!

Anyone for Bridge? Bridge Clubs in Los Gigantes and Los Cristianos are looking for new members, both residents and holiday makers. Either partners or individuals and the clubs run throughout the year. Both clubs have been going for many years and the membership is made up of residents, ‘swallows’ – people who live here for part of the year, and holiday makers.

dreadlocked strays for many years, has commissioned a piece of her artwork (on canvas, 70x50cm) named A Dog’s Purpose. It features her own dog, Gizmo, waiting patiently by the water’s edge for her owner to return from surfing. Nikki is happy to produce further artwork on request, with all profits going to the refuge. Please contact her via

the refuge for more information. Dog-walking? Please visit the refuge if you have any spare time and would like to help us, maybe by walking one or two of the dogs. We are open throughout the summer, so please drop in. There is always a dog or two waiting for some TLC. Or contact us if you are interested

in adopting one of our many dogs, old and young. No adoption fee is charged, but donations are welcomed towards the escalating costs of the refuge. Also, we are always in need of blankets, towels, dog leads, collars and puppy milk, if you have any to spare. Opening hours We are open to the public on Mondays,

Tuesdays, Thursdays and Fridays between 2-5pm, and on Saturdays from 1-4pm. The refuge is closed Wednesdays, Sundays and on Public Holidays. Where to find us The refuge is situated at Granadilla’s Industrial Estate, Exit 51 on the TF1, directly next to ITER, the ecological park which houses the windmills.

Los Gigantes meet at the Oasis at 1.00pm on Tuesdays and Thursdays (contact Liz 922 867214 or email brian. lizh@btinternet.com or Margaret 922 857817 or email davmarwil@ yahoo.co.uk). The Los Cristianos Club meet at the El Comodoro (Ocean View restaurant) at 1.15pm on Wednesdays and Fridays (contact Jean 922 722040 or email edandjean@hotmail. com).


CW 44

Win a meal on air

www.canarianweekly.com 28th August - 3rd September 2015

How to Enter: Listen to OasisFm from Monday 31st August. When asked, call 902 232 102 for the chance to win breakfast, lunch or dinner in any of the restaurants / bars shown here

Good Luck!

Food glorious food! We all like good food and starting on Monday, Oasis Fm is giving you the chance to Win a meal on air! Every week-day Oasis Fm will be giving you the opportunity to win a meal for two at some of the best eating establishments in the south of Tenerife. Win a meal on air is a fun interactive competition which is open to everyone who likes good food. Starting on Monday afternoon with Darren Clarke from 3pm, you can win Breakfast, Lunch and Evening meals for two people and all for the price of a phonecall. All you have to do is listen to Oasis Fm and you could win free food! All the amazing eateries listed on these two pages are involved and prizes range from the biggest of breakfasts to the finest dining. So get listening, be lucky and LET THE FORK SEE THE FOOD!!


www.canarianweekly.com 28th August - 3rd September 2015

Win a meal on air

45 CW


CW 46

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Fitness

28th August - 3rd September 2015

Your workout personality By Nico Gil

of Activate Sports Club

JUST as we all have different personalities when it comes to our tastes in fashion, music, travel destinations, food and what we enjoy reading, there is also a very wide spectrum of workout personalities.

That means how, when and what we most feel comfortable with when it comes to exercising. We’ve all gone to a spinning/yoga/Zumba class after hearing a friend go on and on about how amazing it is, only to be thinking “never again” after the first 10 minutes. This is often the main

reason why people fail to stick to new health regimes. They choose the wrong activity to begin with and then give up through boredom, frustration or annoyance. So the trick is finding activities best-suited to you and your workout personality. And how do you do that? Ask yourself these questions: 1. Are you an early-bird or night owl? If you’re naturally a morning person and like to get your exercise out of the way before you start work, do that. For night owls, people who come alive as the sun goes down and are usually very late in getting to bed, this idea is unthinkable. So make sure you choose the time of day that best suits you to begin with. 2. Do you like exercising with other people? For some, exercise has to be a social activity. They need to be able to go somewhere, see their friends, talk, and find it motivating to be around

other people. There are also those who like to fly solo when it comes to getting physical, and zone out by themselves in activities such as swimming, cycling, running, etc. Don’t go for a group class if people generally tend to annoy you when you’re trying to exercise. 3. Are you a goalorientated person? Do you work well under pressure, and find you produce your best work when you’ve got that adrenaline rush of an upcoming deadline to beat? If so, setting yourself a goal of some sort is likely to spur you on. Sign up for a race/

triathlon/10km run a few months’ down the line and you’ll have something concrete to work towards. 4. Do you have a lot of self-motivation? Are you the type of person who can decide to go for a run or to a class, and never feel tempted to put if off for another day? Or do you need to commit to a class or go with a friend to get yourself off the sofa? 5. What’s your main motivation when it comes to exercising? Looking better? Being healthier? Seeing friends? If your primary reason is socialising, sports like padel are the

perfect mix of aerobic activity and off-court beers and conversation! 6. Do you naturally enjoy or dislike exercise? If you’re not a naturally-active person, you’ll probably find the added motivation of a personal trainer or group instructor very useful when it comes to keeping going. 7. Are you a fan of team sports with rules, or spontaneous activities with greater freedom? If you exercise for fun but don’t like the competitive nature of team sports, or the rules and precision involved in many sports, activities such as Zumba are great for letting yourself go. 8. Do you prefer being outdoors in nature, or within the comfort and support of a gym or sports club? If the idea of being in a class environment gives you claustrophobia, it’s best to exercise in the open air. Luckily, in the Canaries we have the option of year-round sport al fresco - just make sure

you’re sun-creamed up beforehand. 9. What kind of job do you have? Are you on the go all day, or mainly sat at a computer screen? If you’re on your behind all day, choose an activity that gets you up and moving! 10. Do you need to quieten your mind and obtain a certain amount of mental peace as you exercise? If the gym is also your break from loud young children, you might find the calming nature of a yoga or Pilates class more beneficial that the loud music and merriment of Zumba or spinning. There’s no need to try to fit yourself into any particular box, of course. Just because you like Pilates doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy a Zumba class. But try to bear in mind the type of person you are the life you lead and the goals you have, to choose the activities in keeping with your workout personality.

Find us @ Calle Roques del Salmor, 38679 Costa Adeje, Santa Cruz de Tenerife. Tel: 822 070 037


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Puzzle Page

28th August - 3rd September 2015

PRIZE Godoku!

WIN! Tickets for bowling at Megabowl

The rules of Godoku are simple just enter the letters stated below once in each row, column and 3 x 3 square within the puzzle grid. When you have completed it, a word will appear. Email the answer to info@canarianweekly.com before 5pm on Wednesday 2nd September 2015 and you’ll be in with a chance of winning.

47 CW

Caption Competition CW Crossword WIN! 2 tickets to see The Sound of Musicals

Email your caption to info@canarianweekly.com before Wednesday 2nd September 2015.

Last Week’s winner (Issue 916): Steve Sipkins Please come up to the OasisFm / Canarian Weekly offices to pick up your prize. You have until 2nd October 2015 to pick up and use your vouchers.

This week’s letters: A B C I J K L T U

This week’s mystery clue: The title of Jakob Melander’s 2015 mystery with Lars Winkler features a house that … (9 letters).

U A J K U T

T

A C

J K C A K C T J K L B T B I U B C Sudoku X...

Just enter the numbers 1 - 9 once in each row, column and 3 x 3 square within the sudoku X puzzle grid. In addition to standard sudoku, the numbers must only occur once in each side of the ‘X’ that is marked on the grid.

4 3 2

Winning Caption: Well I never thought I would enjoy meddling in things ! Winner: Keith Sykes

Please come up to the OasisFm / Canarian Weekly offices to pick up your prize. You have until 2nd October 2015 to pick up and use your vouchers.

30-Second Brain Training

What better way to train your brain. Starting at the left with the number provided, work across each of these lines applying the mathematical instructions to your running total. Don´t reach for the calculator - that´s cheating! Write your final answer in the last box of the line. Aim to complete each round in about 30 seconds. Good Luck! Beginner Starter Number

3 7 5 8 9 2

9

3

1

2 5 9 4 8 6 5 5 6 3

4

5

2

3

14

x2

+41

÷3

6

7

8

9

69

1

2

3

÷3

-17

6

7

8

x2

-84

5

4

-15

squared

by Trevor Kirton

Arithmagons

Multiplication: The number in each square is equal to the product of the numbers in the circles on either side. Fill in the missing numbers

Answer

÷11 +61

x16

-22

-88

5

4

x12 +28

31%

of this

Answer

9

25%

Last Issue's Answers:

of this

CW Crossword

Advanced Starter Number

1

2

3

3/4

68

x3

-128

of this

6

7

8

9

-12

x16 +42

5

4

-33

75%

of this

Answer

÷2

9

ACROSS. 1 CUTE, 3 IMPROPER, 9 PRINTED, 10 VIRUS, 11 AISLE, 12 SCRUPLE, 13 REPAST, 15 MOMENT, 18 TUMBLER, 20 AWARD, 22 INERT, 23 GLOBOID, 25 SUSPENDS, 26 SEEM.

Arithmagons:

DOWN. 1 COP, 2 TOILS, 4 MODEST, 5 ROVER, 6 PORK PIE, 7 RESPECTED, 8 STRESS, 11 AIRSTRIPS, 14 PAMPERS, 16 ORATOR, 17 FRIGID, 19 LATHE, 21 ABOVE, 24 DIM.

Brain Training:

Beginner: 87 Intermediate: 170 Advanced: 120

And 2 normal sudokus for you aswell...

3 7

5 4 3

8

9 2 5 8

6 2 1 9 7

2 8 7 5

4 2 5 1

3 8 4 9 6

9 7 4 2

3 2 8 7

7

Godoku:

Sudoku X: 5 6 3 9 8 7 1 4 2 1 9 2 5 6 4 8 7 3

1 6 4

3

9 6 1 5

4 9 7 1 6

8 2 7

9

7 6

DOWN 1 Acquires (4) 2 Unskilled, lowly (6) 3 Pace (4) 4 “- Island”, US State (5) 5 Sweat (8) 6 Leapt (6) 7 Chinese dialect (8) 11 Shudders, oscillates (8) 12 Untidy (8) 15 Incendiary liquid (6) 17 Ill-fated (6) 18 Metal alloy (5) 20 Clumsy dolts (4) 21 Money (slang) (4)

Intermediate Starter Number

1

ACROSS 3 Waste metal (5) 6 Fruit preserve (3) 8 Strain (5) 9 Rower (7) 10 Leg protector (4-3) 11 Overnight suitcase (6) 13 Metal beam (6) 14 Foot swelling (6) 16 Blush (6) 19 Double (3-4) 22 Apprentice (7) 23 Nourishes (5) 24 “- Neill”, actor (3) 25 Shouts loud (5)

6 5

8 7 4 1 2 3 9 5 6 9 1 5 2 7 8 6 3 4 6 4 7 3 1 5 2 9 8 2 3 8 4 9 6 7 1 5 4 8 6 7 5 1 3 2 9 7 5 9 6 3 2 4 8 1 3 2 1 8 4 9 5 6 7

Sudoku: 4 6 2 5 9 1 7 8 3

4 8 6 3 7 9 5 1 2

5 3 9 4 8 7 1 6 2

2 5 3 1 6 4 9 7 8

7 8 1 3 2 6 4 9 5

9 1 7 5 8 2 6 3 4

3 1 6 2 7 4 8 5 9

8 3 1 7 9 6 2 4 5

8 2 5 9 1 3 6 7 4

5 6 4 2 1 3 8 9 7

9 7 4 8 6 5 3 2 1

7 9 2 8 4 5 1 6 3

1 5 8 6 3 9 2 4 7

6 2 8 9 3 7 4 5 1

6 4 3 7 5 2 9 1 8

3 4 5 6 2 1 7 8 9

2 9 7 1 4 8 5 3 6

1 7 9 4 5 8 3 2 6


CW 48

British Consulate Address: Plaza Weyler, 8, 1º, 38003 Santa Cruz de Tenerife. Public opening hours: Tuesdays & Fridays: 08.30hrs – 13.30hrs Notarial services: Please consult our webpage or call 902 109 356 or alternatively +34 913 342 194 for further information on how to make an appointment. Please note, we are no longer able to provide notarial services without prior appointment. Emergency Assistance: Assistance is available 24hrs a day, 7 days a week by calling us on 902 109 356 or alternatively +34 913 342 194 E-mail: info.consulate@fco.gov.uk Web:http//: ukin spain.fco.gov.uk Cosumer Office Tel: 922 76 16 00 Town Hall Tel: 922 76 16 00 Emergencies

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Information / Free Ads Emergency Services (All) Tel: 112 National Police - Tel: 091 Local Police Tel: 092 Ambulance Tel: 061 Fire Brigade Tel: 080 Guardia Civil Tel: 062 Multi-lingual police central office Tel: 902 102 112 Call this number and ask to speak to an English operator to make a report or official complaint. Local Police Tel: 922 75 70 06 Red Cross Emergencies and Ambulances Tel: 922 28 18 00 Information and Blood Bank Tel: 922 28 29 24 International MEDSERVICE Tel: 922 79 05 63 Medical Benefits Agency Tel: (00 44) 191 218 7547 For if you find yourself in medical difficulties whilst on

Ligntning McQueen toddler bed with mattress and storage draw, 175 euros. Events management level 3 course from www.openstudycollege.com, 300 euros including name change. 2 x XL mens, left hand golf gloves, 10 euros each. Timberland jumper, XL, 10 euros. Tel: 637 206 026 2 IKEA sofa beds, never been used, 150 euros each. AEG washing machine, 1 year old, 100 euros. Teka microwave, 20 euros. Pair of linen curtains, 150 (w) x 225 (d), 10 euros. Two girls` bikes, 10 & 5 years old. 25 euros each. Tel: 675 345 032 Logitech wireless keyboard and mouse set complete in original box and never used, although box has been opened. (keyboard has Spanish lay-out), 15 euros. Full tilt-and-swivel black TV wall-mounting bracket (UK origin) for TV’s up to 32in, including full mounting kit, all screws and fittings, etc, 10 euros. Sky Plus satellite digibox with white fascia and Sky remote control, will accommodate two satellite dishes, Little used, so excellent cond, 15 euros. Offers considered for all, Costa Silencio area. Tel: 663 422 184.

28th August - 3rd September 2015

holiday and without the proper holiday insurance. Pharmacy Information and Locator (24 hours) Tel: 922 28 24 24 Citizen Information Tel: 010 Postal Services Tel: 902 19 71 97 International Operator Tel: 11825 Local Operator Tel: 11818 Tourist Information Tel: 922 60 55 90 Hospitals & Medical Centres (Answering Machine) Tel: 094 Hospital Las Americas, Playa de las Americas Tel: 922 75 00 22 Playa de Las Americas Centro Medicos Del Sur Tel: 922 79 10 00 Candelaria Hospital Tel: 922 60 20 00 Beach Safety Obey the beach warning flags and always supervise children when near water. Red - Strong currents do not swim

Yellow - Strong winds and turbulent sea conditions. Take care. Green - Safe to swim Shopping Most shops open from Mon - Sat 09:00 - 13:00 then 16:00 20:00 Some shops may open for just Saturday Morning, and many shops are closed on Sundays and Tourist Offices, Bank Holidays, with the exception of souvenir shops which tend to open 7 days a week. Tourist Offices Tenerife Sur Tourist Office (Main Tourist Office) Tel: 902 00 31 21 Santa Cruz de Tenerife Tel: 922 28 93 94 Santiago de Teide Tel: 922 86 03 48 Costa Adeje Tel: 922 75 06 33 Puerto de la Cruz Tel: 922 38 60 00 El Medano Tel: 922 17 60 02 La Laguna Tel: 922 63 11 94

Black 4-drawer TV unit, 112cms long, 50cms wide, 34cms high, vgc, 20 euros. 2 Poang armchairs (IKEA) as new, Royal blue 50 euros each or both for 90 euros. Cottage-style armchair, strong, yellow-patterned, vgc, 20 euros. Electric mattress-raiser vgc (cost 400 euros), will accept 30 euros. Tel: 922 785 894 L-shaped corner sofa, large, plumcoloured velour, 250 euros. Accessories to match: lamp, glassware, rug, picture, all from 30 euros. Large black-and-red rug, 20 euros. Buyer to collect. Tel: 669 640 219 or 922 770 887 Boys' clothes 3-6 months, girls', 6-12 months. Pool inflatables. All to clear, from 1 euro per piece. Tel: 634 131 909 Glass coffee table with black metal, flower pattern shelf (IKEA) 25 euros. Parasol stand, dark grey, 15 euros. Solid wood oval coffee table, with claw feet, 80 euros. Pool inflatables - recliner chair, 10 euros, small chair & ring, 8 euros. Calor gas bottle, 40 euros. Indoor palm house plant 5ft, 10 euros. Electric fire, 10 euros. Fairy lights, yellow flowers, 5 euros. Tel: 664.825.596 Set of five 6 x stud wheels, tyres, 4 part-worn, 1 , including wheel nuts, good for ITUV, 235 x SR15, 190 euros or very near offer. Tel: 636 243 261 Garanaña Area

La Orotava Tel: 922 32 30 41 Las Galletas Tel: 922 73 01 33 Los Cristianos Tel: 922 75 71 37 Los Llanos de Aridane Tel: 922 40 18 99 Playa de las Américas Tel: 922 79 76 68 Playa de las Vistas Tel: 922 78 70 11 Tour Operators TUI/ Thomson Tel: 922 761 201 Thomas Cook Tel: 922 757 409 Cosmos Tel: 922 793 802 Transport TFS - Tenerife Sur Airport (Reina Sofia) For flights from the Spanish mainland and nearly all scheduled international flights. Telephone numbers: Flight Information 902 404 704 (lines open 24 hours) Airport Information Tel: 922 75 90 00 Tourist Information Tel: 922 392 037 TFN - Tenerife Norte

airport (Los Rodeos) For all domestic flights and some scheduled international and mainland services. Telephone numbers: Flight Information Tel: 902 404 704 (lines open 24 hours) General Information Tel: 922 635 800 Buses TITSA is Tenerife´s public bus company. Tel: 922 53 13 00 The ´Bono-Bus´ discount card can be purchased from all TITSA stations and terminals of TITSA and reduces the cost of transport by up to 30%. Radio Taxis Tel: 922 64 11 12 N.B. Taxi cabs display a special SP (Servico Público) licence plate. Arona Taxis Tel: 922 74 75 11 National Ferry Services Fred Olsen Tel: 922 62 82 52

Jobs

Care assistants required for a disabled male wheelchair user - fit and non smoking. Full personal care, cleaning and food preparation. Email: jm795@outlook.com Native English Teacher required for Language School in El Medano. If interested contact: hesperialanguageschool@gmail.com Adeslas the leading organization of medical and dental insurance in Spain, seeks professional parttime and full time agents to spearhead their Autumn/ Winter campaign. Do you have the burning desire to achieve top rewards with the opportunity for advancement? It’s a rewarding career with great flexibility for the right candidates. Contact 648 899 761 for an interview Wanted for an established in house sales team in the south of Tenerife, experienced reps for fractional and points based products. Great commissions and weekly incentives. Limited positions, apply now to Justine@pearlygrey.com or phil@pearlygrey.com or call between 9am -3pm on 922 743 900. Telemarketers required for a busy office environment in Adeje. Flexible working hours, easy parking and fantastic working conditions. Contact Sarah on (0034) 922 758 425 or email: admin@sloncemarketing.com


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Free Ads / Classified

28th August - 3rd September 2015

Jobs (cont.)

We are looking for native-like speakers of some of the following languages: English, German, French, Dutch, Swedish, Norwegian, Danish, Finnish, Italian, Russian, Polish, Czech or Portuguese. We offer a position to conduct telephone surveys for some weeks, from Tenerife to different European countries. E-mail: info@ serviciosestadisticos.es Tel: 922 645 574

Property for renT (cont.)

Property for Sale

Venli requires an Aluminium Worker to manufacture doors and windows. Contact Jo on 618 776 167 or send your CV to workshop@venli.com Cars/BIKES

A360. PORT ROYALE, LOS CRISTIANOS. Studio; living area 38 m2 + 12 m2 terrace, 1 bathroom, open-plan kitchen. Communal pool. 89.950 Euros

B1548. PLAYA HONDA, PLAYA DE LAS AMERICAS. Large one bedroom apartment; just few minutes walking to the beach. Communal pool. 135.000 Euros

C1665. SANTA MARIA, TORVISCAS. Beautiful one off penthouse for sale! 2 bedroom, 1 bathroom apt with lounge-diner, kitchen & a terrace with fantastic views. 262.500 Euros

D1537. FALCON MANOR, SAN EUGENIO ALTO. Spacious 3 bed property on small well-kept complex with a heated communal swimming pool. 400.000 Euros

www.thepropertygallery.com Property for renT

Tel 922 797 438 Mobile: 693 713 686

info@tenerifeislandrentals.com

Montana Chica - 650€

Los Cristianos – 2 bed apartment with stunning views of the harbour, spacious apartment with American style kitchen, large family bathroom, off Street parking.

www.tenerifeislandrentals.com

Chayofa - 750€

Mirador Del Atlantico - 2 bed 2 bath apartment with fully fitted kitchen, both bedrooms are of doublé size, has a south facing balcony from the lounge plus a spiral staircase leading to a roof terrace.

IN HOUSE MaintenanceVERS EO TEAM FOR ALL JOBS/MAK

Cars wanted CARS BOUGHT FOR CASH - Offer made once seen, we will come to you. WANTED small cars to medium cars, 4 X 4’s, small vans, people carriers, runners and non runners, accident damaged, etc. ANYTHING CONSIDERED.

Call us now on 678 451 641

Cabo Blanco - 375€

2 bed apartment located on the ground floor to this residential complex, both bedrooms are of double size with fitted wardrobes and has a spacious lounge/dining area.

El Roque - 990€

Fabulous 3 bed 3 bath house, tastefully decorated with independent fully fitted kitchen, large roof terrace leading from bedrooms with sea views, parking to the front of the property.

Local 1, Edif Sur Y Sol, Av Londres, Los Cristianos

Air-conditioning

49 CW


CW 50

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Classified / Service Point

28th August - 3rd September 2015

Construction (cont.)

Antiques

Lawyers

ALADDINS CAVE. Antiques & Vintage Goods bought & sold Tel: 922 720 493

Blinds

Cars

Mechanics Electrician

Chiropodist Ann Malpass M.A.F.H.P. M.C.F.H.P. Qualified Chiropodist. All your foot care needs solved in the comfort of your own home/hotel. Tel 625 799 570 Elaine Watson Jones MSSCh MBChA. Based in Los Cristianos. I offer perosnal visits to the South of Tenerife. Tel: 608 029 790. Email: canarianfeet@gmail.com

Cleaning

All ELECTRICAL WORK CARRIED OUT. Fully qualified, 25 years experience. Reliable, Clean, conscientious worker. Very competitive rates. Specializing in fault finding. For expert advice/free estimates Phone Danny, Los Cristianos 822 901 384.

Garden Furniture

Elite Cleaning Services is an established cleaning company who can provide a professional cleaning service for Apartments, Villas and Offices. Call us today on 922 789 795 or 696 922 597.

Computers

Telephone: 922 736 728

Health & Beauty www.fitnesswithdebbie.com Tel: 664 576 779 www.yogavibetenerife.com

E-mail: Computer Service Provider BT Authorised Dealer Dell Registered Partner

info@act-tenerife.com

Web:

www.act-tenerife.com

Construction

Home removal

Kitchens & bathrooms Colin Taylor – Renovations & Maintenance, Bathrooms, Kitchens, Tiling, Plumbing, Decorating, Plastering etc. Tel: 661 081 843 for quotation.

Patio Doors & Windows


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Service Point

28th August - 3rd September 2015

Patio Doors & Windows

Second-hand Shops

TV and Satellite (cont.)

House, Apartment & Villa Clearances Everything bought for Cash Immediate Decisions

Call Freddie on 609 303 634 Long & Short Term Storage also available.

repairs

Personal ServiceS Las Galletas, new, 2 friends, sensual, friendly services. Come and enjoy our kisses. Tel: 669 738 298

security

Sissy, Los Cristianos. Slim, sexy, domination, good looking, Private Apartment, Call: 634 273 126 TRANSEXUAL VENEZOLANA, BEAUTIFULL, TALL, BLONDE, LOS CRISTIANOS. 602 626 848

Pest control

Plumbing

Tiling

Boiler King: All plumbing works undertaken including boiler replacements, drain clearance, swimming pool pump repair & maintenance. Tel: 680 278 579

Pool tables Translation TENERIFE TRANSLATION SERVICES: Legally registered with over 25 years experience. Official, Medical, Notary, Wills, Utilities, Probate, Pensions, car paperwork and much more. Professionalism and confidentiality guaranteed. Transport available. Call Tracey on 666 857 991 or email on info@tenerifetranslationservices.com

Property services Travel agents

Removals UNIVERSAL EXPORTS S.L. PROFESSIONAL REMOVALS TO AND FROM THE U.K. Email: info@removals-tenerife.com Transport Licence: No. 11572932 C.I.F. No. B38820395 Tel: 922 720 711

TV and Satellite Menny Fix, Satellite TV Tel 922 792 116 Avnd; Antonio Dominguez 18, Edif: MarOLa Local 2, Los Cristianos. EST 1994, Repairs, Maintenance and Sales.

51 CW

Windows


CW 52

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Sport

28th August - 3rd September 2015

Tenerife hit for six Numancia 6 CD Tenerife 3

By Roscoe WHEN you score three goals away from home after leading at half-time, you expect to finish the match with at least a point. For the second time, and in consecutive matches, Tenerife hit three goals in Soria.

But while Numancia also got three last time, on this occasion it was a half-a-dozen!The second half was a horror show as Tenerife made the hosts look like Barcelona. All the optimism from a fine pre-season vanished in just five minutes, with the first of many defensive howlers allowing Oscar Diaz to open the scoring. And it could have been two before Tenerife levelled through Suso on the half-hour. Carlos Ruiz put Tenerife ahead a few minutes later and suddenly, the world seemed a better place. Going into the break 2-1 up, Tenerife manager Raul Agne must have thought it was his Position 1. CD Numancia de Soria

in the second half. It took Juanma three minutes to equalise and then, former CDT player Natalio, who always seems to score against us, gave Numancia the lead 90 seconds later. Pablo made it 4-2 before Alex Alegria scored the first of his two goals. Nano’s late strike was no consolation for a well-beaten Tenerife. At least we lost to the league leaders!

lucky day - 15 minutes to sort out the defence and get the holding midfielders on track. “Keep it tight. Maintain your shape. Give yourself half-a-yard on the edge of the box. Clear to the wings. Don’t ball-watch at corners … and no silly fouls around the box.” It’s not rocket science. If Agne said all of that, his team can’t have been listening because Tenerife were awful Points

PLD

Won

Draw

Lost

F

A

3

1

1

0

0

6

3

2. AD Alcorcón

3

1

1

0

0

2

0

3. SD Ponferradina

3

1

1

0

0

2

0

4. Club Atlético Osasuna

3

1

1

0

0

2

0

5. UD Almería

3

1

1

0

0

3

2

6. Deportivo Alavés

3

1

1

0

0

3

2

7. Córdoba CF

3

1

1

0

0

1

0

8. Girona FC

3

1

1

0

0

1

0

9. Gimnàstic de Tarragona

1

1

0

1

0

2

2

10. Albacete Balompié

1

1

0

1

0

2

2

11. CD Lugo

1

1

0

1

0

2

2

12. Real Oviedo

1

1

0

1

0

2

2

13. Real Zaragoza

1

1

0

1

0

1

1

14. CD Mirandés

1

1

0

1

0

1

1

15. CD Leganés

0

1

0

0

1

2

3

16. SD Huesca

0

1

0

0

1

2

3

17. Athletic Club B

0

1

0

0

1

0

1

18. Real Valladolid CF

0

1

0

0

1

0

1

19. Elche CF

0

1

0

0

1

0

2

20. RCD Mallorca

0

1

0

0

1

0

2

21. UE Llagostera

0

1

0

0

1

0

2

22. CD Tenerife

0

1

0

0

1 3 6

Agne said: “It was horrible, a really rough day at the office. What made it worse was we didn’t compete. And you always have to do that. I am in charge so I take the blame. But now it’s on to the Nastic match, and we prepare for that.” It is rumoured that after the match, Agne tore a strip off Vitolo and Aitor Sanz. There was also a lengthy chat with the two central midfielders in training on Tuesday, which was witnessed by the media. Club captain Vitolo said: “We must be men and be professionals. This was not a coaching error; this is the players’ fault, and we know that. We have had all week to digest what happened. “I know this group well enough and we will be back to where we should be. We had a great pre-season so I hope the Numancia game is just one of those matches.” Centre-back German, who made his debut, was in similar form “I was proud to make my debut, but I want to learn from the game,” he said. “I know what I did wrong and it will not happen again.” This weekend, Nastic are in town for the first home match. The club hoped to sell 9,000 sea-

son tickets but it looks like only 6,000 have been shifted. Social media has been full of pictures of the pitch, which was smashed up during the Mena concert last weekend. This is not the club’s fault as they are just tenants. The pictures do not look good, but one taken yesterday afternoon (Thursday), seemed to show the pitch in much better condition. And the Heliodoro is not Wembley at the best of times. As I wrote last week, Nastic will look to consolidate after promotion, and they started life in the second tier with a perfectly-acceptable draw at home to Albacete. In a thrilling finale, they came back from two goals down, thanks to Xavi’s 89th-minute strike and a 96th-minuted penalty from Marcos. They are led by former Tenerife skipper Manolo Martinez, who played 111 times for Tenerife. Bought as a tough-tackling central-midfielder, he was moved to centre-back and this transformation was the bedrock to the 2009 promotion season. Martinez was one of our better players in La Liga the following year. He left after relegation

and, following a lucrative spell in Greece, he skippered Nastic to promotion last season. He was looking forward to his return this weekend but, in true Martinez style, he was sent off against Albacete! “I can have no complaints,” he said. “I was doubly annoyed as I let my team down. But also, I knew I would miss the Tenerife match. I enjoyed my time in Tenerife. The fans live and breathe football. Everyone seems to remember my time in Tenerife and, of course, the promotion. “I have great memories. In fact, just around the corner from where I live now, there is a cafe called El rinconcito del Teide. So I think of Tenerife every day.” In La Palma last weekend, Mensajero started life back in the third tier with an opening-day, goal-less draw against Rajo Majadahonda. On Sunday, they have tricky trip to Fuenlabrada. In the Canarian section of Tercera Division UD Ibarra lead the way after thumping La Cuadra 5-0. There were big wins for Lanzarote and Telde, while CD Tenerife B won 3-1 at Union Vera. CD Marino had a sorry 2-1 defeat at El Cotillo.


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53 CW

Sport

28th August - 3rd September 2015

Waterfall Warriors’ wonder HAVING been promoted to Division 1, Waterfall Warriors might have been one of the teams battling relegation in their first season in the top flight. But no, a quick glance at the league shows them nicely placed in midtable.

Of course, we were not aware of their secret weapon: the wonderful Warrior Lynn! My scouts tell me she

in sparkling form and is proving to be more than capable of holding her own in this division, so to speak! No surprise then, that Lynn hit her first maximum of the campaign during the Warriors’ home derby clash with Palms Pool Bar, which ended 4-4. With the sad loss of Bar 180 A, it now looks to be a straight race between the top two, and both Boothen Army and Phoenix Bar enjoyed heavy victories last Friday. With Steve and Chris on the maximum trail, the Army comfortably beat the Playboys, while the Phoenix put

division 1 ResultS

division 2 ResultS

Bar 180 B 3-5 Emerald Lounge Boothen Army 7-1 Ourplace Playboys Emerald Shamrocks 0-8 The Phoenix Exiles Bar 4-4 Boothen Titans Gaffers 6-2 Palms Sports Bar Waterfall Warriors 4-4 Palms pool bar

Bar Leones Mad Hunters Naughty Nautas Ourplace Playgirls Picassos Shandys Chippers Sundowners

P-P Gaffers Jucee Girls 7-1 Waterfall B 6-2 Summerlands 5-3 Marilyns 3-5 Clouseaus P-P Spear Chuckers 5-3 Pas o Nadas B

division 2 Table

division 1 Table Table

P W D L F A +- PTS

Table

P W D L F A +- PTS

1 Boothen Army

11 11

1 Phoenix Flights

11 11

2 Picassos

12 6 4 2 56 40 16 56

3 Boothen Titans 11 6 2 3 51 37 14 51

3 Spear Chuckers

11

11 5 3 3 51 37 14 51

2 The Phoenix

0

0 74

14

60

74

10 9 0 1 68 12 56 68

4 Emerald Shamrocks 12 7 2 3 51 45 6

51

4 Summerlands

5 Hoppys Bar

9

6

1

2 49

23

26

49

5 Shandys Chippers 9

6 Exiles Bar

11

5

2

4 46

42

4

46

5 7

0 4 1

0 69 2 54 1 49

19 34 23

50 20 26

69 54 49

6 Sundowners

12

5

3

4 48

48

0

48

7 Clouseaus

11

5

3

3 45

43

2

45

8 Waterfall Warriors 11 4 1 6 39 49 -10 39

8 Naughty Nautas

10

4

2

4 44

36

8

44

9 Ourplace Playboys 10

35

9 Bar Leones

11

4

2

5 44

44

0

44

12

5

1

6 44

52

-8

44

12

4

2

6 44

52

-8

44

7 Gaffers

9 4 3 2 41 31 10 41 3

1

6 35

45 -10

10 Emerald Lounge 11

2

2

7 34

54 -20

34

10 Mad Hunters

11 Palms Sports Bar 10

3

0

7 26

54 -28

26

11 Marylins

12 Palms Pool Bar

2

2

5 24

48 -24

24

12 Gaffers Jucee Girls 10 2 2 6 32 48 -16 32 30

9

13 Bar 180 B

11

1

1

9 20

68 -48

20

13 Ourplace Playgirls 10 4 0 6 30 50 -20

14 Pas O Nadas A

9

0

1

8 18

54 -36

18

14 Pas O Nadas B

11

1

1

9 29

59 -30

29

15 Waterfall B

11

0

0 11 17

71 -54

17

eight past Emerald Shamrocks, aided by Bubbles’ fifth 180 and a 125 check-out. Gaffers, with new signings on board, dropped just two points against Palms Sports Bar, while Boothen Titans, now placed third, were held to a draw at Exiles.

Elsewhere, Emerald Lounge held the trebles leg to squeak a win over Bar 180 B. With the Spear Chuckers not playing - and despite losing at home to Clouseaus - Picassos are now second in Division 2, just 13 points behind the inactive Phoe-

nix Flights! Naughty Nautas, a difficult team to beat, claimed a handsome 6-2 victory over fourth-paced placed Summerlands, while Mad Hunters went totally bonkers and swept aside Waterfall B 7-1. The other two matches in this section went

all the way to the last rubber as the Playgirls won the trebles to beat over Marilyns - a feat mirrored by Sundowners, which gave them victory over the threeman team of Pas O Nadas B. A big hat-tip to Sheena and her players!

Cheap thrills from top scorers IN terms of pointscoring in the Oasis Fm Fantasy Football League, the underdogs have been the best performers so far.

All squads feature players who were cheap and fitted in after the money had been spent on superstars. And right now, these players are scoring the points! I noticed this week that quite a few teams have already played wild cards, which really

is brave as we are only three weeks into the season. The point-scoring team of the week are a genuine, mixed bag of players and clubs, who all achieved wins, some more comfortable than others. Man City, Crystal Palace and Chelsea all had two players feature. The remainder came from Newcastle, Watford, West Brom, Leicester and Bournemouth. The Cherries recorded their first Premier League win ever, and Callum Wilson secured their

first-ever hat-trick at this level; thus, making him the week’s highest point-scorer, with 17 points. In the league, Henry Parrado’s team, Nerd Smash FC, scored the highest points. They

achieved an impressive 79, and Henry has to thank Aleksander Kolarov, Yaya Touré, Riyad Mahrez and Pedro, who all contributed double figures. As for the table itself, we have a couple of familiar names in the top three. Leading the way are Frank Devaney’s team, Baines on Toast, with 185 points. Just behind him are The Untouchables, managed by Harri Cobban, on 182 points. And in third spot are Gordon Wilson’s Coffee Shop Karma team, with 169 points. But can

Frank and Gordon stay there? All three teams have something in common, though - they all have

either Kolarov or Mahrez, or both, in their ranks. And so far, they have scored very consistently.

Fantasy Football League 1. Baines on Toast

Frank Devaney

59

185

2. The unstoppables

Harri Lobban

76

182

3. Coffee shop karma

Gordon Wilson

63

169

4. Jacqui’s giants

Jacqui Obeirne

36

162

5. waterfallcitysaints

James McGuffin

70

155

6. LVG goodbye RVP

Eamo Farrell

45

154

7. Passo united

Trevor Passingham

62

154

8. golfreds

Gary Peart

58

153

9. Ooh eh Missus

Brian Nichols

61

151

10. Jolly boys outing

Paul Tregent

56

149


CW 54

www.canarianweekly.com

Sport

28th August - 3rd September 2015

Bluebell wings clipped A N O T H E R round of matches in the Oasis Fm Pool League has again demonstrated that the results show just how tight the divisions will be this season.

The standard of pool seems to be improving, week on week and, in Division One, it was business as usual for reigning champions Gaffers A. They continued their winning streak, this time against Bluebell A, who were promoted from Division Two and had started well with two wins from two games. But they found out on Tuesday just how tough it is at the top. They held their own in a couple of frames, but Gaffers were just too strong, adding another three points. Dreamers A, sitting pretty in second spot after a fantastic start, travelled to Silencio to meet Exiles A, who picked up a couple of frames. But there was only one team in it as the Dreamers quickly amassed the frames they needed for another win. Palms B are another team to have made a good start and are, so far, unbeaten. This week saw them take on Gaffers B, who are also proving to be a difficult

team to get a result against. It was a close match, as the visitors fought back from 3-1 and 5-2 down to lead 6-5. But they couldn’t get over the line, and a point was a fair reflection. It was better news for the Phoenix Bar, whose two teams finally got their seasons started. The Potters had a challenging game against Rewind A down in Puerto Colon. The visitors started stronger and took a 3-1 lead, but the home team hit back in the next set of frames to level at 4-4 going into the final session. Geoff gave the Potters the lead, only for Danny to hit back, and the match seemed to be heading for a draw. But Dave and Pod both held their nerve to give Potters their first win. It was a similar pattern for The Phoenix, at home to Treehouse A. The hosts took a 3-1 lead, only for Treehouse to take the next section, and again it was 4-4. Adam won to put the hosts ahead but they were pegged back again and nobody could make the breakthrough, so the points were shared. Down on Amarilla Golf, it was Terrace derby night as the Roosters took on the Bantams. The Roosters hadn’t had the best start this season, but they welcomed back captain Fin and started

the match with real desire. Greer beat Con to take the lead, and frames were then traded like a couple of old fighters slugging it out. It was soon 2-2, and Mario put the home team back in front. But the Bantams hit back, and Fin made a winning return to make it 4-3. Bantams’ captain Adi then fluffed his lines, having two shots on the black and over-running it. That let Mark back in and it looked like the Roosters would lead 5-3. But Mark rattled his black and it was 4-4. Bantams regrouped, dug deep and Con, Mal and Marky P all won their frames to clinch the clash. Roosters showed real fight, though, and will come back stronger. Another team struggling are Palms A, who won comfortably in the first week and enjoyed their time at the top of the table. But since then they have gone backwards. Another away tie beckoned this week, against Tenerife Hammers C, another team struggling. But the Hammers showed the real spirit and fight of which we know they are capable. Palms A had no answer and, for the second week in a row, lost 9-3. It’s back to the drawing board for the former champions and double winners, but at

least they have a home match next week - and they do have a 100% record there so far. Treehouse B, making the early running in Division Two and sitting on top of the pile, faced a tricky match against Picasso’s A. The first two sections followed a similar theme: Picasso’s won two frames, and then Treehouse won two until the score was 4-4. Steve B won his game and the visitors were in front again, but this time the home team fought back, taking the final three frames for victory by the narrowest of margins. Bluebell B, going well in second spot, welcomed Sabores to Los Cristianos and never looked back after a bright start. Sabores, still finding their feet in the league, were up against tough opponents and did well to take a couple of frames to keep the scoreline a little more respectable. Dreamers B were another team from last season who had started well. They took a trip out to Valle San Lorenzo to face Crown B, this week’s league newcomers. However, the team comprises a few well-known faces, who have played in this league before and it showed. They made a fast start, putting frames on the board quickly, and Dreamers were like a rabbit caught in the headlights. Before they knew it, the match was won, and a couple of consolation frames will not have softened the blow. With Alex, Teflon and Greg the Bounty Hunter in their ranks. Crown B could easily storm this division. Crown A, also in home action, welcomed Splash Bar to town and this match was a lot closer than the one unfolding on the other table. Both teams

division 1 ResultS Exiles A Gaffers A Palms Bar B Rewind A Tenerife Hammers C Terrace Roosters The Phoenix

3-9 8-4 6-6 5-7 9-3 5-7 6 - 6

Dreamers A Bluebell A Gaffers B Phoenix Potters Palms Bar A Terrace Bantams Treehouse A

division 1 Table Table

P W D L F

A +- PTS

1 Gaffers A

4

4

0

0

34

14

20

12

2 Dreamers A

4

3

1

0

32

16

16

10

3 Palms Bar B

4

2

2

0

28

20

8

8

4 Treehouse A

4

2

2

0

26

22

4

8

5 Tenerife Hammers A

3

2

1

0

21

15

6

7

6 Terrace Bantams

4

2

0

2

26

22

4

6

7 Bluebell A

3

2

0

1

20

16

4

6

8 Gaffers B

4

1

2

1

25

23

2

5

9 Phoenix Potters

4

1

1

2

23

25

-2

4

10 Rewind A

3

1

0

2

15

21

-6

3

11 Tenerife Hammers C 4

1

0

3

20

28

-8

3

12 Exiles A

4

1

0

3

19

29 -10

3

13 Palms Bar A

4

1

0

3

16

32 -16

3

14 The Phoenix

3

0

1

2

16

20

-4

1

15 Terrace Roosters

4

0

0

4

15

33

-18

0

division 2 ResultS Bluebell B Hoppys Bar The Crown A The Crown B Treehouse B division 2 Table Table

10 - 2 6-6 6-6 10 - 2 7-5 P

W D

Sabores Tenerife Pool Tables Splash Bar Dreamers B Picasso’s A L

F

A

+- PTS

1 Treehouse B

4 4 0 0 31 17 14 12

2 Bluebell B

4

3

0

1

29

19

10

9

3 Dreamers B

4

2

0

2

20

28

-8

6

4 Tenerife Pool Tables

3

1

2

0

23

13

10

5

5 The Crown A

2

1

1

0

15

9

6

4

6 The Crown B

1

1

0

0

10

2

8

3

7 Picasso’s A

2

0

1

1

11

13

-2

1

8 Splash Bar

3

0

1

2

16

20

-4

1

9 Hoppys Bar

3

0

1

2

15

21

-6

1

10 New Team 2

0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0

11 Sabores

4 0 0 4 10 38 -28 0

were playing well and searching for a foothold. Neither could do it, though, and the teams could not be separated as it finished a draw. Splash were left to rue their luck after poor old Darren Winter potted the black twice in mid-frame! In the night’s final game, Hoppys Bar took on Tenerife Pool Tables, with the visitors looking to continue their climb up the

table. It was another frustrating match for both sides, the game soon levelling out at 4-4. Harley (10-yearold Harley) then beat Hoppys’ owner Kev to give TPT the lead, only for Adi to lose his first frame of the season as Hoppys drew level. Fat Nick eventually managed to win a game to put TPT back in the driving seat. But Hoppys persevered to take the final frame and a share of the spoils.


www.canarianweekly.com

Sport

28th August - 3rd September 2015

55 CW

City streets ahead already THREE games in, and only Man City have their 100% record intact - and they are living up to their billing as favourites to lift the trophy come May. Leicester have continued their good start, while Man Utd and Liverpool have dropped just two points. But the former look more and more unconvincing by the week. By Adi Benson

Liverpool v West Ham

Liverpool will be happy with their results so far: three games in and they have dropped just two points, at Arsenal. More importantly, they haven’t conceded a goal. Against the Gunners they showed glimpses of quality, but much more is needed, and this is a good opportunity for them to score a few. West Ham started well with a good victory at Arsenal, but since then have gone backwards. Their performances have been below-par and they will be looking to rectify that this weekend. There is talk of new strikers coming in, but they need to stop giving away easy goals. Last season: 2-0 Prediction: Home win

Newcastle v Arsenal

Given the players who have been bought in, Newcastle have not started as well as they would have wished. They have taken just two points from their opening fixtures and rode their luck at times against Man Utd last weekend. Defence hasn’t been too bad, but they need to start scoring. Arsenal still look short of a few players, notably a striker and some steel in midfield, but Wenger again seems to have buried his head in the sand. They have some great creative players, but they always look likely to concede goals. Last season: 1 – 2 Prediction: Away win

Aston Villa v Sunderland

Villa know they are expected to win but, as a team and a squad, they still seem to be finding their way. There have been no outstanding performers as yet, but they do have quality in the side. However, defensive frailties are still costing them late on, and concentration is key. A battling performance last weekend saw Sunderland rewarded with a deserved point. The fans will have seen a little of their capabilities, but there is still such a long way to go, and talk of a managerial change so soon in the season is a distraction the club doesn’t need. Last season: 0-0 Prediction: Draw

Bournemouth v Leicester

Well done to the Cherries on getting their first Premier League points last weekend, And well done Callum Wilson! Football is all about momentum and they must take their confidence into this fixture. They will have concentrated on defence in training this week as it is still a weak spot, but the signs are there that they will be okay. Leicester, who have had an excellent start, find themselves in second spot. But cast your minds back to last season, when they also started strong but ended up in a relegation battle. They need to be careful that they don’t get too carried away. Last season: N/A Prediction: Draw

Man City v Watford

So the City juggernaut keeps rolling, with three wins from three, and you can’t see anything different happening in this game. The key to City’s form has been the resurgence of a three players who under-performed last season, notably Touré, Sagna and Kolarov. Those three are like new signings and have been a big part of the wins. I’m sure Watford will be happy with remaining unbeaten, but they have managed draws only and are still searching for that elusive win. Unfortunately, that will have to wait for another week because I cannot see them withstanding the City attack. Last season: N/A Prediction: Home win

Stoke v West Brom

Given the players Mark Hughes has bought to the Britannia, Stoke will not be happy about the start they have made because so much more was expected. This will be viewed as a fixture in which they can get their season started. It’s time for the flair players to show the league exactly how capable they are. West Brom are in the unenviable position of being bottom of the league, but they showed real fighting spirit in their defeat against Chelsea - something that will pay dividends against weaker opposition. The uncertainty about Saido Berahino isn’t helping, though! Last season: 2-0 Prediction: Draw

Spurs v Everton

All of a sudden, Spurs have become an unattractive club as they struggle to attract players. And with their miserable start to the season, it won’t get any easier. Desperately in need of a striker, they are chasing Berahino, but West Brom are reluctant to do business. If that pursuit fails, I am not sure where they will turn. Everton have performed better than them and will be looking to put the City defeat behind them. They are aware that this is a great time to be playing Spurs. Lukaku will be key, and I can see him getting change out of the home team’s defence. Last season: 2-1 Prediction: Away win

Southampton v Norwich

Are the Saints suffering from the Europa League curse? They have not started well, which could be down to having one eye on qualifying for Europe. In addition, there are talks of certain key players being unhappy and looking for a move. Not great preparation for a long season. Norwich have started okay, but they still have a long way to go. They will fancy their chances and, if they attack early and get in front, they could well record another win. With their opponents having played last night (Thursday), they must be favourites. Last season: N/A Prediction: Away win

Swansea v Man Utd

The Swans are so far unbeaten in the league, yet they haven’t looked overly convincing. However, they have a striker in Bafétimbi Gomis, who is in-form, and a winger in Jefferson Montero, who is scaring the life out of defences. These two will be key and, if they set about United early, I can see a Swansea win. United still look unconvincing, and Van Gaal’s team selection is baffling a few people. I know a lot of United fans and they don’t like him, but they are unbeaten. The problem stems from the fact that they aren’t scoring goals – two in three matches, and one of those was a Spurs own-goal! A striker is needed, but don’t worry - he has Fellaini! Last season: 2-1 Prediction: Home win

Chelsea v Crystal Palace

So José is back to his worst, and just about everybody hates the Chelsea mindset. Yes, since the manager has turned into a grumpy old man, they probably do! Against West Brom, his side looked well-belowpar and teams seem to have worked out how to keep Hazard quiet. However, Tenerife’s own Pedro, signed from Barcelona, made a great start, and the Spanish World Cup-winner could be vital to their season. Palace, as expected, have been going well in their opening games, losing just one to Arsenal - and then they probably deserved a draw. If they can make a quick start, there may just be something in it for them. Yohan Cabaye could cause Chelsea serious problems. Last season: 1-0

Prediction: Home win


CW 56

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