October 2014 costa link magazine

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If, like me you are just starting to recover from the hectic summer months of constant visitors and the feeling that you are running a hotel, if you’re just starting to relax and get back to some kind of normality, enjoying the cooler but still gorgeous weather, then enjoy it whilst it lasts! I say this because Christmas is just around the corner and whether you are planning a visit to the UK or spending it here on the Costa del Sol, this is a hectic and stressful time for almost everybody!

If you are planning your Christmas meal or Christmas party then why not take a look at on page 33 the Costa Link small business party is going to be held at Barboru restaurant on the 20th of December please book early to avoid disappointment.

You may also want to take some time in this short ‘quiet’ period to enquire about our special Christmas deals for advertising in Costa Link magazine. All that said, before Christmas comes Halloween (31st October). If you are planning a party (any excuse eh!) or just a bit of trick or treating, then Party Party in Calahonda will help to cover all of your ghoulish needs. At least here we can look forward to trick or treating in the warm & not freezing our bits off!

in the October Magazine

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Medical Section... Advice from dentists to help on diets the A-Z of medical healthcare on the Costa del Sol. If you need any advise on any medical matter look here...

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A Man’s World: Bond, James Bond it’s a 007 special...

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All Revved Up... Keeping with the Halloween theme. Scary cars from movies and a real life guaranteed to give you a fright.

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What’s On Guide... Walk for charity with the Rotary club, the Fuengirola Feria and lots more going happening on the Costa del Sol.

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Solutions on page 84 Puzzle It Out... Puzzles galore challenge those little grey cells.

Kids Page... Spooky goings on in the science lab, monsters and lots more!

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Business Directory... Can’t find that all important contact information see page 80.

Like Us

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Solutions on page 84 Trivia Quiz... Pit your brains against the TRIVIA QUIZ, questions for all ages from 6 -116!

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The Jokes Page: Laugh out loud, we did! Get some giggles in on page 76!!!

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Women’s World: A high school reunion with a difference! See page 8...

Call: 951 216 131 or 663 061 669

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No part of this publication, including layout, graphic design or pictures may be copied, SCANNED, used or reproduced without our prior written consent. Costa Link Magazine accepts no responsibility for alterations to events listed, claims made by our advertisers or information provided by our contributors. All rights reserved © 2014.

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A Woman’s World SCHOOL REUNION (& THE SECRET POWERS OF WINE)...

Cathy, Sue and Jane haven't seen each other since High School. They rediscover each other via a reunion website and arrange to meet for lunch in a wine bar.

Cathy arrives first, wearing a beige Versace. She orders a bottle of Pinot Grigio. Sue arrives shortly afterward, in gray Chanel. After the required ritualized kisses she joins Cathy in a glass of wine. Then Jane walks in, wearing a faded old tee-shirt, blue jeans and boots. She too shares the wine.

Cathy explains that after leaving high school and graduating from Oxford University, she met and married Bill, with whom she has a beautiful daughter. Bill is a partner in one of London’s leading law firms. They live in a 4000 sq. ft. apartment in Mayfair, where Susanna, the daughter, attends drama school. They have a second home in the South of France. Sue relates that she graduated from Cambridge University with first class honors and became a surgeon. Her husband, Clive, is a leading City investment banker. They live in a massive house next to the Thames and have a second home in Naples, Florida.

Jane explains that she left school at 17 and ran off with her boyfriend, Brian. They run a tropical bird park in Southampton and grow their own vegetables. Brian can stand five parrots, side by side, on his penis.

Halfway down the third bottle of wine and several hours later, Cathy blurts out that her husband is really a cashier at Tesco. They live in a small ex-council flat in Walthamstow and have a caravan in Hailing Island.

Sue, chastened and encouraged by her old friend's honesty, explains that she and Clive are both nurses' aides in a retirement home. They live in Brixton and take their holidays in Southend on sea. Jane admits that the fifth parrot has to stand on one leg.

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HOT GOSS!

GREAT BRITISH BAKE OFF GETS VIEWER COMPLAINTS FOR BEING 'TOO SMUTTY'? Despite its booming ratings and critical acclaim, not everybody is happy with the current series of The Great British Bake Off. The BBC's complaints show Points of View featured a segment this week, focusing on viewers who were unhappy with the "constant smutty" remarks from hosts Sue and Mel. Innuendo has long been a part of the show's charm for many fans and the BBC even plays along on Twitter with the #innuendobingo hashtag. However, it's clearly not everyone's cup of tea or slice of cake!

KRIS JENNER FILES FOR DIVORCE FROM BRUCE JENNER 11 MONTHS AFTER SEPARATING... Kris Jenner has filed for divorce from estranged husband Bruce Jenner, 11 months after the couple separated. The Jenners announced their split following 22 years of marriage in October 2013.

According to court documents filed on Monday (September 22nd) in Los Angeles Superior Court, Kris cited irreconcilable differences as the reason for their breakup.

She requested joint custody of 17-year-old daughter Kylie Jenner, the only minor left in the Kardashian-Jenner family, E! Online reports. She also listed their date of separation as June 1, 2013. Both Kris and Bruce have previously stressed that they remain close friends since their separation. Kris also opened up about the prospect of dating last November, saying she would not be opposed to seeing a younger man.

9 X FACTOR ACTS WHO WE THINK MUST MAKE THE LIVE SHOWS...

After only five weeks of X Factor we're already starting to develop unhealthy obsessions with acts that we love. Here are 9 acts we'd love to see every Saturday night this autumn. 1. Raign, 2. Jake Quickenden, 3. Scarlett Quinn, 4. Ben Haenow, 5. Stevi Ritchie, 6. Andrea Faustini, 7. Lauren Platt, 8. Electric Blonde & 9.

Lola Saunders let us know what you think editor@costalinkmagazine.com.

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HOT GOSS!

FROM PINEWOOD WITH LOVE… Craig is back as Bond and shooting next instalment in London. James Bond is back, the 24th installment of the spy drama due to get underway in London on December 6th. Daniel Craig, 46, will pull on his tuxedo once again, having already signed up to appear as the secret agent in two more films. Ralph Fiennes will return, having taken over from Judy Dench's M at the end of the last movie.Further afield in places including Rome, the Austrian Alps, Morocco, and possibly India are being scouted. Mr Bond we can’t wait to see you!

RITA ORA JOINS THE VOICE UK FOR FOURTH SERIES… The singer joins Tom Jones, will.i.am and Ricky Wilson on the coaching panel for the BBC One show. All four coaches will travel to Salford this month ahead of the blind auditions for the show.The Voice UK launches in January 2015.

MARIO FALCONE IS BACK ON TOWIE AFTER DRUG SHAME, BUT SAYS HIS WILD PARTYING DAYS ARE BEHIND HIM… Mario Falcone has announced that he’s back on TOWIE after he was a very naughty boy, and got suspended when a video of him snorting cocaine emerged. Mario’s was filming with the rest of the Essex gang in Ibiza last month, but has said despite all the temptation that comes with partying on the White Isle,the 26-year-old has put his drug-taking days behind him. He told The Sun: “Obviously I will go out with the boys and get drunk but that’s it, that’s as far as it goes now. I think it’s just growing up.” Despite the fact it wasn’t his choice to take time out from TOWIE, Mario says he was starting to get bored of working on the reality show. “Me and Tom (Pearce) are the only single ones so we are going to form an alliance and just go out all the time. Watch out ladies! (No seriously… watch out.) The two-hour Towie special will be one of the programmes launching ITV's new entertainment and lifestyle channel ITVBe.

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HALLOWEEN SURVIVAL GUIDE

•When it appears that you have killed the monster, NEVER check to see if it's really dead.

• If you find that your house is built upon or near a cemetary, was once a church used for black masses, had previous inhabitants who went mad or committed suicide or died in some horrible fashion, or had inhabitants who performed satanic practices in your house, move away immediately.

• NEVER read a book of demon summoning aloud, even as a joke.

• Do not search the basement, especially if the power has gone out.

• If your children speak to you in Latin or any other language which they should not know, or if they speak to you using a voice which is other than their own, shoot them immediately. It will save you a lot of grief in the long run. NOTE: It will probably take several rounds to kill them, so be prepared.

• When you have the benefit of numbers, NEVER pair off and go it alone.

• As a general rule, don't solve puzzles that open portals to Hell.

• NEVER stand in, on, above, below, beside, or anywhere near a grave, tomb, crypt, mausoleum, or other house of the dead.

• If appliances start operating by themselves, move out.

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HALLOWEEN SURVIVALcoGUIDE n t in ue d.. .

• If you're searching for something which caused a noise and find out that it's just the cat, leave the room immediately if you value your life.

• Do not take ANYTHING from the dead.

• If you find a town which looks deserted, it's probably for a reason. Take the hint and stay away.

• If you're running from the monster, expect to trip or fall down at least twice, more if you are of the female persuasion. Also note that, despite the fact that you are running and the monster is merely shambling along, it's still moving fast enough to catch up with you.

• If your companions suddenly begin to exhibit uncharacteristic behavior such as hissing, fascination for blood, glowing eyes, increasing hairiness, and so on, get away from them as fast as possible.

• Stay away from certain geographical locations, some of which are listed here: Amityville, Elm Street, Transylvania, Nilbog (you're in trouble if you recognize this one), the Bermuda Triangle, or any small town in Maine.

• If your car runs out of petrol at night, do not go to the nearby deserted-looking house to phone for help.

• Don't fool with recombinant DNA technology unless you're sure you know what you're doing.

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TRIVIA QUIZ

1) Which starsign do 2 fishes represent?

2) If tachycardia is a fast heartbeat, what is tachypnea?

3) What has Katie Price named her baby daughter?

4) What is the technical term for the collarbone?

5) A sow is a female pig, what is a male pig called?

6) What ‘c’ is an infection of the intestine caused by drinking dirty water?

7) What ‘t’ is the name of a river that flows into another river rather than flowing into a sea or lake?

8) Who was God speaking to from the burning bush?

9)What were the names of Margo and Jerry Leadbetter’s neighbours in ‘The Good Life’?

10) Which 1970’s film starred Angela Lansbury as a trainee witch?

11) What were the names of the

lead actor and lead actress from the film Grease?

12) What is the name of the famous Spanish artist who was born in Malaga?

13) Who had a 1960’s hit with ‘Right Said Fred’?

14) On which film is the musical High Society based?

15) What was Beyoncé first solo album called?

16) Who sang with Meatloaf on ‘Dead Ringer for Love’?

17) Which film starred lots of ghosts and a giant marshmallow man?

18) How many Halloween films have there been?

19) Who was the 2014 Snooker World Champion?

20) What is the colour of the dot on the fastest squash ball that is used in cold conditions?

21) A full size snooker table is 12 foot long, but how wide is it?

22)What is the name of Jamie Olivers new book?

23)In American Football, how many points are scored for a field goal?

24)Which English Boxer said ‘I enjoyed hitting him and he enjoyed me hitting him’?

25) Who was ‘Addicted to Love’ in the 1980’s?

26) Who told you to ‘Go West’ in the 1990’s?

27) Who was ‘Bad’ and ‘Dangerous’?

28) Who was the founder of Easyjet?

29) Who was the first woman to lead a political party?

30) Who wrote the stories about Peter Rabbit?

Answers on page 84

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8 BIZARRE EATING HABITS

If you are what you eat, you may be shocked by what people consume because of their bizarre eating habits and disorders. Check out the list!

SO, WHAT’ S FOR XYLOPHAGIA - EATING WOOD DINNER People with xilophagia like to eat things like paper, pencils, tree bark or other items made of wood.

TONIGHT?

TRICHOPHAGIA - EATING HAIR

The person eating hair, usually their own; primarily after pulling it out. Most often, hair is pulled out and then the ends of the root bulb are eaten, or occasionally the hair shaft itself.In 2007 an 18 year old girl suffering from trichophagia was found with a 10pound hairball in her stomach. Cats around the world were flabbergasted.

HYALOPHAGIA - EATING GLASS

Very dangerous for obvious reasons. Sharp glass + soft tissue = pain and injury! Please DO NOT TRY this at home (or anywhere).

UROPHAGIA - CONSUMING URINE (PEE)

Believe it or not, consuming one’s own pee (or the pee of a healthy person) is relatively low in risk, albeit utterly disgusting. In Euro-American culture, these practices are known as urine therapy, a form of alternative medicine. Also, some people consume urine as a sexual activity, and members of at least one culture consume urine for ceremonial purposes.

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8 BIZARRE EATING HABITS ...

Geophagy - EATING DIRT Continued

Cooked, baked, and processed dirt and clay are sold in health food stores. Some pregnant women eat mmmmmm, chalk to eliminate nausea and to get extra calcium. It also i fancy, oh, me occurs in animals where it may be a normal or abnormal tonight... behaviour. MMMMMMMM, mud!

cannibalism - EATING HUMAN FLESH

The Korowai, also called the Kolufo, are a people of southeastern Papua (i.e., the southeastern part of the western part of Indonesian New Guinea). They number about 3000 and are one of very few tribes still believed to eat human flesh as a cultural practice.

auto-cannibalism - EATING ONESELF

Also called self-cannibalism. On January 13th, 2007, Marco Evaristti, a Danish artist, served pasta that was topped with a meatball made with his own fat. I find myself without both words or an appetite.

Coprophagia - EATING FECES (POO)

This is very rare, and only seen on some cases of extreme mental disorders. Centuries ago, however, physicians used to taste their patients’ feces, to better judge their state and condition. True, but why? Really.

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ITALIAN GOLFER

Silvio, an 80-year-old Italian goes to the doctor for a check-up.

The doctor is amazed at what good shape the guy is in and asks, 'how do you stay in such great physical condition?'

I'm Italian and I am a golfer,' says Silvio, 'and that's why I'm in such good shape. I'm up well before daylight and out golfing up and down the fairways. I have a glass of vino, and all is well.’ "'Well' says the doctor, 'I'm sure that helps, but there's got to be more to it. How old was your Father when he died?'

'Who said my Father's dead?' The doctor is amazed. 'You mean you're 80 years old and your Father's still alive. How old is he?'

'He's 100 years old,' says Silvio. 'In fact he golfed with me this morning, and then we went to the topless beach for a walk and had a little vino and that's why he's still alive. He's Italian and he's a golfer, too.'

'Well,' the doctor says, 'that's great, but I'm sure there's more to it than that. How about your Father's Father? How old was he when he died?'

'Who said my Nonno's dead?'

Stunned, the doctor asks, 'you mean you're 80 years old and your grandfather's still living!

Incredible, how old is he?’ 'He's 118 years old,' says the Old Italian golfer.

The doctor is getting frustrated at this point, 'So, I guess he went golfing with you this morning too?' 'No, Nonno couldn't go this morning because he's getting married today.'

At this point the doctor is close to losing it. 'Getting married? Why would a 118 year- old guy want to get married?' 'Who said he wanted to get married?"

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Bob’s problem...

The guys were all on Bob’s stag do. No one wanted to share a room with him, because he snored so badly. They decided it wasn't fair to make one of them stay with him the entire weekend, so they voted to take turns. The first guy who’s turn it was to sleep in the same room as Bob came to breakfast the next morning with his hair a mess and his eyes all bloodshot.

They said, 'Man, what happened to you?

He said, 'Bob snored so loudly, I just sat up and watched him all night. ' The next night it was a different guy's turn. In the morning, same thing - hair all standing up, eyes all bloodshot. They said, 'Man, what happened to you? You look awful!'

He said, 'Man, that Bob shakes the roof with his snoring. I watched him all night.'

The third night it was Pete's turn. Pete was a big burly ex-Navy man; a man's man.

The next morning he came to breakfast bright eyed and bushy tailed. ' Good morning,' he said.

They couldn't believe it! They said, 'Man, what happened?'

He said, 'Well, we got ready for bed. I went and tucked Bob into bed, patted him on the bottom, and kissed him good night. Bob sat up and watched me all night.'

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Medical Tips

The Flu Jab:

Influenza (flu) causes a high temperature (fever), muscle aches, cough, and various others Symptoms. Each year a different strain of the influenza virus causes a winter outbreak of flu. If you are normally well, flu usually lasts a few days, and then goes as your immune system clears the virus. However, some people who have flu develop serious complications such as pneumonia.

Flu immunisation (the 'flu-jab') gives good protection against flu, and lasts for one year. The vaccine is normally ready by the autumn each year. It is made from the strain of influenza virus that is expected in the coming winter. You need a yearly immunisation to keep protected. Flu immunisation does not prevent other virus infections which can cause coughs and colds.

It protects only against the influenza virus that is expected in the coming winter. The flu immunisation does not cause illness. It is a coincidence if you develop a cough or cold shortly after having a flu immunisation.

Who should be immunised against the influenza virus?

The aim is to protect people who are more likely to develop complications from flu. Current advice is that you should be immunised against the influenza virus each autumn if you:

• Are aged 65 or over.

• Have a chronic (ongoing) lung disease.

• Are a child who has previously been admitted to hospital with a lower respiratory tract disease such as pneumonia.

• Have a chronic heart disease. For example: if you require regular medication or follow-up for ischemic heart disease (angina, heart attacks, etc), congenital heart disease, chronic heart failure, hypertensive heart disease.

• Have a serious chronic kidney disease.

For example: nephrotic syndrome, kidney failure, if you have had a kidney transplant.

• Have chronic liver disease such as cirrhosis.

• Have diabetes which requires insulin or tablets to control it.

• Have a poor immune system.

(For example, if you have no spleen, are taking chemotherapy or steroid treatment, if you have HIV/AIDS, etc.)

• Live in a nursing home or other long stay residential care accommodation.

You may have a temporary mild soreness at the injection site. Sometimes, it can cause a mild fever and slight muscle aches for a day or so. This soon settles and does not lead to flu or other problems.

If you are normally healthy and under 65 then you do not need to be immunised against the influenza virus.

This is because you are unlikely to develop complications should you get flu.

Clinica Medicare is a Preferred Partner of “medilink” Your British Health centre here on the Costa del Sol. For more information on Clinica Medicare or any of our other Preferred Partners call “medilink” on 952 93 38 76 36

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Medical Mayhem

Funny but true‌There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2040, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.

A market researcher calls at a house and his call was answered by a young woman with three small children running around her.

He asked her if she minded replying to his questions and she agreed.

He asked her if she knew his company, Cheeseborough-Ponds.

When she said no, he mentioned that among their many products was Vaseline and she certainly knew of that product.

When asked if she used it, the answer was "Yes." Asked how she used it, she said, "To assist sexual intercourse."

The interviewer was amazed.

He said, "I always ask that question because everyone uses our product and they always say they use it for the child's bicycle chain, or the gate hinge; but I know that most use it for sexual intercourse.

Since you've been so frank, could you tell me exactly how you use it?"

"Yes, we put it on the doorknob to keep the kids out."

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Diabetes

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If you have been diagnosed with diabetes, you have probably wondered if your children will develop it too.

Dr Antonio Cuesta, scientific director of the International Institute of Genetics of Diabetes (INIGEDIA), professor in the department of Biomedical Science, at the University of Copenhagen, Denmark, and chief of Endocrinology Department at Clinica Santa Elena in Torremolinos, Malaga, will give us important information about the role played by genes in the development of diabetes, and how genes can impinge upon your treatment.

Q: ARE GENES REALLY IMPORTANT IN THE DEVELOPMENT OF DIABETES?

Genes play a role in the development of diabetes. however we have to consider that there are different types of diabetes and depending on the type of diabetes the genetic contribution will be more or less significant.

Type 1 and type 2 diabetes have different causes. yet two factors are important in both. you inherit a predisposition to the disease then something in your environment triggers it.

In Type 1 diabetes, siblings of patients with T1D present an average prevalence risk of 6% compared to 0.4% in the general population.

In Type 2 diabetes, in contrast to a general population risk of approximately 7%, the offspring of a diabetic parent has a 40% likelihood of developing T2D, and this risk increases to 70% if both parents are affected.

Another and very important type of diabetes is Monogenic Diabetes (MD), where the genetics are the “only” cause of diabetes.

Q: WHAT IS MONOGENIC DIABETES?

It is a type of diabetes caused exclusively by a mutation in a single gene and runs in families from one generation to the next. All children of an affected parent with MD have a 50% chance of inheriting the affected gene and developing MD themselves.

Q: HOW IMPORTANT IS IT TO IDENTIFY MONOGENIC DIABETES?

MD accounts for around 3-4% of all diabetes cases and the identification of the gene causing the diabetes is extremely important because it enables us to establish the most appropriate treatment, a better prediction of the progression of the disease in the future and to advise other family members of their risk of inheriting it.

It is also very important to know that MD is often misdiagnosed as either type 1 or type 2 diabetes. Therapies to treat MD are different to those used to treat type 1 or 2 diabetes, therefore, a correct genetic diagnosis will improve treatment.

Q: HOW AND WHEN DO YOU DIAGNOSE MD?

By performing a genetic test on a blood sample.

MD is typically diagnosed in late childhood, adolescence, or early adulthood. however, it has been known to develop in adults as late as their 50s. Again, many people with MD are misdiagnosed as having type 1 or type 2 diabetes. hence, a correct diagnosis of MD could change the course of treatment and could help to identify other family members with MD.

Q: WHO SHOULD BE TESTED FOR MD?

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Anyone diagnosed with diabetes at or under 12 months of age A diabetes patient who is part of a family with three or more consecutive generations affected by diabetes A diabetes patient with stable, mildly elevated blood sugars, often found incidentally during a routine check-up A “type 1″ diabetes patient who has negative blood testing for autoantibodies, typically done at the time of diabetes diagnosis.

A “type 1″ diabetes patient with a low insulin requirement that is stable or low hbA1c (under 7%).

A “type 2″ diabetes patient who is normal weight, or not significantly overweight, and shows no signs of insulin resistance.

A “type 2″ diabetes patient with a strong family history of diabetes who has been on different pills with no or little impact on their hbA1c.

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Limit TV to help fight obesity Adults and children should consider having TV-free days or limiting viewing to no more than two hours a day under new proposals to tackle obesity. The National Institute for Health and Care Excellence (NICE) in the UK recommendations also include avoiding drinks with added sugar and limiting takeaways. The draft guidance, the first on the subject since 2006, is aimed at helping people maintain a healthy weight. The guidelines make a number of recommendations that aim to ensure the advice given about maintaining a healthy weight is more specific and based on real evidence.

There are also new recommendations encouraging people to monitor their weight and activity levels, using apps or regular weigh-in sessions.

The suggestions include: • Walking or cycling to school or work • Reducing TV viewing with strategies such as TV-free days or setting a limit of no more than two hours a day in front of the TV screen • Cutting down on calorific foods, such as fried food, biscuits, sweets and full-fat cheese • Adopting a Mediterranean diet high in vegetables, fruit, beans and pulses, whole grains, fish and olive oil • Avoiding drinks sweetened with sugar, including fizzy drinks, sports drinks and squash • Limiting the amount of fast food and takeaways • Limiting the amount of alcohol consumed, as alcoholic drinks are a source of extra calories A quarter of adults - up from 15% 20 years ago and one in five schoolchildren is obese, figures show.

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Top 10 facts about

ghosts

Being as it’s Halloween this month we just thought we’d give you the low down on ghosts, ooooooooo 1. Lemurs take their name from the Latin lemures meaning ghosts, because of their mysterious and mainly nocturnal lifestyles.

2. In 2004, the Indian Statistical Institute in New Delhi was closed after reports of visits from the ghost of a dead student.

3. The Royal Albert Hall in London is supposedly haunted by a 19th-century organ maker’s ghost.

4. A recent poll reported that 87 per cent of Chinese office workers believe in ghosts.

5. Swaziland Prime Minister Prince Bhemkimpi was reported in 1995 to have complained about ghosts terrorising his subjects...

6. ...the ghosts hadn’t invaded the royal household supposedly because they were afraid of the dogs.

7. A woman on the Isle of Wight complained of a ghost in 1995 that turned on lights and electrical equipment.

8. An energy company spokesman said it was the first time a high bill had been blamed on a ghost.

9. “An idea, like a ghost, must be spoken to a little before it will explain itself.” (Charles Dickens).

10. According to a report in 2011, 25 per cent of Britons say they have seen a ghost.

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MY NAME IS BOND, JAMES BOND...

As we reported in the “Hot Gossip” section earlier in the magazine the 24th James Bond film is set to begin shooting in December, we love the fast women, fast cars and have a little man crush on Daniel Craig himself but here are five things we're hoping won't make the cut.

The news that Sam Mendes and Daniel Craig will commence filming on the latest James Bond movie should have us leaping for joy, but as fans of all 23 of his outings to date (yes, that includes On Her Majesty's Secret Service) we remain apprehensive about what may feature in the new film, given some of the recent missteps made by the franchise.

1: Parkour (climbing, swinging, vaulting and jumping over buildings) Despite his smart appearance, James Bond loves extreme sports, whether it's surfing down waterfalls in Die Another Day or paragliding past henchmen in The World Is Not Enough - he's even got involved in a spot of the Evil Knievel motorbike madness in Quantum of Solace! However, while we are fully expecting Jimmy B to get involved in some maximum-adrenaline high-jinx, we pray it's not a return to the parkour of Casino Royale. Hello? Yeah, it’s 2006 calling, they want their trendy and extremely annoying sport back.

2: Celebrity Cameos Cameos can be annoying at the best of times, and James Bond films have featured their fair share of scenestealing celebs in roles that rarely add much to events at hand. Things reached a low point in Die Another Day which featured a mental amount of cameos including Richard Branson and Oliver Skeete, though they were nothing compared to the horror of Madonna.

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Bond special continued...

3: Home Alone 007 One of the best things about Skyfall was the final 30 minutes, where Bond, M and new best mate Kinkade hole themselves up in a Scottish estate to wait for Javier Bardem's Raoul Silva. It's here that the gang proceed to setup the kind of hilarious booby traps that have been missing from cinema since the glory days of Home Alone. However, what worked well once for Bond once may not stand up if repeated - you only have to look at Home Alone 3 to see that.

4: Poker Faces If a tear of blood fell from your eye every time you had a good hand in poker, would you continue playing?

Surely you'd lose every time? Those are some of the questions that haunt us every time we think about Casino Royale and Le Chiffre. A film featuring one of the most absurd poker hands ever produced; as youngsters we were wowed by the cards being shown. Today, we simply wince.

5: Invisible Cars Ejector seats in Goldfinger were innovative, remote controlled steering in Tomorrow Never Dies was a stretch, however, when Q unveiled an invisible car in Die Another Day, our heads exploded. Part of the worst James Bond movie ever, the car not only defied logic, but was also just not very bond. Moonraker was made in the seventies and features Roger Moore and it's much more excusable than this monstrocity.

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Top 10 facts about

WIZARDS

1. The word ‘wizard’ comes from the Middle English ‘wysard’, meaning ‘a wise man’.

2. The Wizard Of Oz (1939) is the only film with ‘wizard’ in its title ever to win an Oscar.

3. The Wizard Nebula NGC7380 is a star-forming region 8,000 light years from Earth. It was discovered by Caroline Herschel in 1787.

4.W, I and Z are the 23rd, ninth and 26th letters of the alphabet; A, R and D are the 26th, ninth and 23rd letters from the end of the alphabet, making them the reverse of the first three.

5. A cairn terrier named Terry was paid $125 a week to play the dog Toto in The Wizard Of Oz. 6. A canine double played Toto when Terry was recovering from being stepped on by an actor.

7. In Deuteronomy 18:11, wizards are described as “an abomination unto the Lord”.

8. The brush-footed butterfly Rhinopalpa polynice of India and Asia is also known as ‘The Wizard’.

9. A horse named Wizard was second in the Derby in 1809. His son Young Wizard was second in 1817.

10. “A man also or woman that hath a familiar spirit, or that is a wizard, shall surely be put to death: they shall stone them with stones: their blood shall be upon them.”

(Leviticus 20:27)

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October 2014 Costa Link Magazine_Editorial Layout 9/24/14 2:51 PM Page 53

Marble Floor Polishing Phone Paul: 654 589 218

Before

After

Free advice on how to care for your floors at www.marblefloor.info

October 2014 Costa Link Magazine_Editorial Layout 9/24/14 2:51 PM Page 54

NO sex since 1955

A crusty old Marine Sergeant Major found himself at a gala event hosted by a local liberal arts college.

There was no shortage of extremely young idealistic ladies in attendance, one of whom approached the Sergeant Major for conversation.

"Excuse me, Sergeant Major, but you seem to be a very serious man. Is something bothering you?"

"Negative, ma'am. Just serious by nature."

The young lady looked at his awards and decorations and said, "It looks like you have seen a lot of action." "Yes, ma'am, a lot of action."

The young lady, tiring of trying to start up a conversation, said, "You know, you should lighten up. Relax and enjoy yourself."

The Sergeant Major just stared at her in his serious manner.

Finally the young lady said, "You know, I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but when is the last time you had sex?"

"1955, ma'am."

"Well, there you are. No wonder you're so serious. You really need to chill out!

I mean, no sex since 1955!"

She took his hand and led him to a private room where she proceeded to "relax" him several times.

Afterwards, panting for breath, she leaned against his bare chest and said, "Wow, you sure didn't forget much since 1955."

The Sergeant Major said, after glancing at his watch, "I hope not; it's only 2130 now."

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ALL REVVED UP...

We thought we would keep in theme with the car page this month, so, if you see any of these cars this Halloween, keep your distance!

The Munster’s Koach and Drag-u-la. The Koach was everyday transport for a not-so-everyday family and was often seen parked outside 1313 Mockingbird Lane. It was built on a lengthened 1926 Model T ford chassis with a custom hearse body. It was 18 feet long and cost almost $20,000 to build. Grandpa Munster used the Drag-u-la, a dragster built from a coffin, which he used to win back "The Munster Koach" after Herman lost it in a race.

The Car was a 1977 thriller/horror film. The story is about a mysterious phantom black coupe that appears out of nowhere and goes on a murderous rampage, The Car enters town and begins running down the citizens. The film is memorable for its sound effects, most notably the terrifying horn blast the car makes when claiming a victim.

Christine was a red-and-white 1958 Plymouth Fury, and starred in the film of the same name in 1983 written by Stephen King and directed by John Carpenter.

Bought by Arnie Cunningham - a typical high school nerd who learns that Christine has a mind of her own and devotes his time to restoring her. He begins to change and becomes disconnected with reality and his friends. The only way to bring him back to reality is to destroy Christine, but Christine is ready to destroy any one else who gets in her way.

Ecto -1 was used in the film Ghostbusters to carry the team's ghost-capturing equipment, as well as transporting the Ghostbusters through New York City. It has a distinctive siren wail. Its features include a special pull-out rack in the rear containing the staff's proton packs, which facilitates a quick retrieval without the complication of having to reach into the vehicle's rear. There are also various gadgets mounted on the top, whose function is never revealed in the movies.

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The Guadia Civil Ferrari Enzo – If you see this in your mirror – it is guaranteed to terrify you!

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A quick comeback

A quick comeback... I was over the moon I had landed a great new job at Carrefour. Well I lasted less than a day…… I started at 8 o’clock all was going wonderfully well until about 11am, a very loud woman walked into the store with her two kids, yelling obscenities at them all the way.

As I had been instructed, I said, pleasantly, "Good morning and welcome to Carrefour."

I then said, "Nice children you have there. Are they twins?"

The woman stopped yelling long enough to say "Don't be stupid.

Of course they aren't twins. The oldest one's 9, and the other one' is 7.

Why the hell would you think they're twins? Are you blind, or just stupid?"

I replied, "I'm neither blind nor stupid, Madam.

I just couldn't believe someone had sex with you twice?!?

Mobile Phone Etiquette...

After a tiring day, a commuter settled down in his seat and closed his eyes. As the train rolled out of the station, a woman sitting next to him pulled out her mobile phone. She started talking in a loud voice: "Hi sweetheart. It's Sue. I'm on the train".

"Yes, I know it's the six thirty and not the four thirty, but I had a long meeting. No, honey, not with that Kevin from the accounting office. It was with the boss. No sweetheart, you're the only one in my life. Yes, I'm sure, cross my heart!"

Fifteen minutes later, she was still talking loudly. When the man sitting next to her had enough, he leaned over and said into the phone, "Sue, hang up the phone and come back to bed." Sue doesn't use her mobile phone in public any longer.

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Strangebuttrue...

These Strange But True Facts Will Really Surprise You

• In 1999, Havard physicist Lene Hau was able to slow down light to 17 meters per second and in 2001, was able to stop light completely.

• At an Amazon.com warehouse in Pennsylvania, workers were required to work, in some cases walking 15 miles a day in 100+ degree heat. When the news broke, Amazon’s initial response was to keep and ambulance outside the warehouse.

• In 1965 a ‘grossly obese’ man survived without eating for 1 year and 17 days. He lived entirely off his copious body fat except some yeast in the beginning, multivitamins and then some potassium from around day 100. He ended up losing 125kg of weight with no adverse effect. He only pooped every 40-50 days!

• In the 1960’s, a soviet doctor named Leonid Ivanovich Rogozov had to remove his own appendix after it burst because he was the only doctor stationed in a remote Antarctic facility with no option for evacuation. The operation lasted one hour and 45 minutes and he lived to tell the tale.

• Early in her career Mila Kunis, who emigrated from the Ukraine, auditioned to play a Russian Jewish girl who moves to America. Instead, she was cast as a Mexican. She is both Russian and Jewish.

• A coal power station puts 100 times more radiation into the air than a nuclear power plant producing the same amount of energy.

• Carrots are bad for rabbits in large quantities and the misconception started with the popularity of Bugs Bunny cartoon.

• In 2006, the FBI planted a spy named Craig Monteilh in a Southern Californian mosque and disguised him as a radical Muslim, The Muslims in the mosque ended up reporting him to the FBI for being a potentially dangerous extremist.

GARDEN CENTER L I N D AV I S TA

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Ctra de Cadiz, Km171,29670, San Pedro de Alcantara, Behind McDonalds in San Pedro. Tel; 952785206

CLM©2008

HU GE RA NGE OF: POT S lG ARD E N TO OLS lPLA NT S FLOW ERS & S HRU B S lG A RDEN FU RNI TU RE lG A R D E N O R N A M E N TS

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FINANCIAL NEWS

We can all rest easy now, since Scotland decided to stick with its neighbour and not go it alone. The markets loved the "no" vote and GBP hit just over 1.28 vs. the euro in the early hours of Friday morning, it has now settled down. The UK economy seems to be doing OK, house prices are up. The Bank of England have kept interest rates on hold, however we are due a rate rise early in 2014.

The ECB invited banks in the euro zone to take advantage of 4-year low interest loans to be offered to businesses with in the EU to help stave off deflation, very few banks took up the offer. As we know the euro zone economy stagnated in the 2nd quarter of 2014, at just 0.3% inflation is running below the target of just under 2% set by the ECB. Trade surplus rose in Euro zone as exports grew faster than imports. France also came under pressure from its euro neighbours to do more to keep its budget promises, with a possible credit rating downgrade looming, all is not well for our French cousins.

The US Fed. Reserve met last mid September to discuss the possible interest rate rise and the tapering of their n=bond buying programme, Interest rates remind on hold and it was decided that another â‚Ź10bn would be cut from the bond buying programme. The US's national debt has grown by more than a TRILLION USD in the last 12 months, the US national debt stands at around $18 Trillion.

If you want to make the most of your currency transfer please contact Moneycorp on 952 587 657 and mention Costa Link Magazine.

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Rhubarb & Custard Tart

Ingredients:

FOR ThE PASTRY •150g/5½oz plain flour, plus extra for dusting •150g/5½oz cold unsalted butter, cubed, plus extra for greasing •100g/3½oz ground almonds •4 sprigs fresh rosemary

Method:

•100g/3½oz caster sugar •1 large egg yolk FOR ThE RhUBARB SAUCE •500g/1lb 2oz rhubarb (as red as possible), chopped into chunks •60g/2¼oz caster sugar •2 cinnamon sticks

1) For the pastry, sift the flour into a large bowl and add the cold butter. Using your fingertips gently rub the butter into the flour until it resembles fine breadcrumbs. 2) Stir in the almonds, rosemary and sugar. (You could use a food processor and pulse a few times instead of doing it by hand.) Add the yolk and bring together with your fingers but don’t overwork. 3) Wrap in cling film and place in the fridge for 30 minutes. 4) Preheat the oven to 170C/325F/Gas 3. Place a 23cm/9in fluted flan tin on a baking tray. 5) For the rhubarb sauce, put the rhubarb, sugar, cinnamon and four tablespoons of water in a saucepan and bring to the boil. Simmer until the rhubarb is soft, then remove from the heat and allow to cool a little. 6) Discard the cinnamon and, using a hand held blender or food processor, blend the rhubarb to a purée. Pass through a sieve and pour into a squeezy sauce bottle or piping bag and set aside to cool. 7)On a lightly floured work surface, roll out the pastry thinly. (It will be very hard to work with but you can patch it up in the tin if it tears.) Line the tin with the pastry, making sure the edges aren’t too thick.

Alternatively, shape the pastry into a disc, place in the tin and the use your fingers to press the pastry into the shape of the tin. Transfer to the fridge to chill for a few minutes. 8) Meanwhile, cut a piece of baking parchment large enough to line the pastry. Scrunch it up into a ball then open it out. This softens it, ready for blind baking the pastry case. 9) Remove the pastry case from

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•1 free-range egg, beaten for egg wash FOR ThE CUSTARD •4 large egg yolks •60g/2¼oz caster sugar •600ml/20fl oz dbl cream •freshly grated nutmeg

the fridge and prick all over with a fork. Put the softened baking parchment inside and fill with baking beans or uncooked rice. Make sure the edges of the pastry case are covered with the baking parchment and it is overhanging - this will protect the pastry from burning. Bake for 15 minutes, or until the pastry is dry and pale golden-brown. 10) Remove the baking parchment and beans. Brush the egg wash over the pastry and return to the oven for another 5 minutes. Remove from the oven and allow to cool. 11) Turn the oven down to 160C/325F/Gas 3. 12) For the custard, whisk the eggs and sugar together in a bowl. In a saucepan, bring the cream to the boil then add it to the egg and sugar mixture. Whisk until well combined and the sugar is dissolved.

Pass through a fine sieve into a jug. 13) Once the pastry case is cool, pipe a thick swirl of rhubarb purée into the pastry case. Pour half of the custard over the rhubarb before transferring the pastry case to the middle shelf of the oven. Carefully pour in the remaining custard while the tart is in the oven (this will prevent the filling spilling over the pastry when you lift it into the oven). 14) Bake for 10 minutes, then carefully remove the tart (the filling will still be very wobbly) and squeeze the remaining rhubarb purée in a big swirl over the custard. Return the tart to the oven and bake for a further 25 minutes, or until the custard is set but still has a gently wobble in the centre. Leave to cool in the tin before turning out. 15) Grate the nutmeg over the top and serve.

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What’s On Guide...

5th October 2014: Rotary Club (Marbella/Guadalmina) Charity Mountain Walk this is an amazing event try one of three walks up and around La Concha 1. Conquer La Concha – Hiking Adventure to the Summit, 2. Walk on the Wild Side - and see the Cruz de Juanar, 3. Marbella at your Feet and the Bronze Goat all starting from Refugio de Juanar and ending with lunch there for more information please see the website at: www.rotaryclub-marbella-g.org/event/fundraisingwalk-charity.

5th October 2014: Día de las Sopas Perotas: The Alora soup festival the event will take place at Plaza Baja de la Despedía which will include free tastings of sopa perota as well as other local delicacies. There will even be children's activities, workshops, flamenco dancing and more. For more information go to www.alora.es.

6th to the 12th October 2014: Fuengirola Feria. The biggest attraction of this fair is the horse with plenty of exhibitions on horses, singing and flamenco dancing, bullfighting and activities in the fairground tents.

7th to the 17th October 2014: Oktoberfest in Malaga this traditional German beer festival attracts visitors from all around to sample German food, beer and culture. The festivities will take place everyday from 1:00pm to 1:00am in the tent installed on Plaza Marina, which include food such as sausages, chicken, German baked goods, Bavarian cheese and the famous pretzel! For more information on the Oktoberfest in Malaga call 627 27 27 54.

11th to the 13th October 2014: The Pizarra Ruta de la Tapa (Tapas Route) is held this year from October 11 to 13, 2013. This tapas festival is the chance for the village of Pizarra in Valle del Guadalhorce to promote its culture and give visitors a chance to taste this delicacy in various bars and restaurants for only 1.70 euro each. The festivities start on Friday October 11th from 12:00pm to 4:00pm, then start again at 8:00pm (Sunday until 4:00pm only). For more info call 952 48 30 15 or see the website: www.pizarra.es.

12th October 2014: Dia de la Hispanidad (Hispanic Day) is celebrated throughout Spain and is one of Spain´s biggest public holidays. On this day in 1492 Christopher Columbus landed in the Bahamas from Spain and discovered the Americas. Most businesses will be closed today.

26th October 2014: Clocks go back. Winter months officially start.

Every Monday: 11 am – 1 pm: Age Care Drop In where people can chat, share experiences and find out about living in Spain at La Iglesia Bar, near Bonanza Square, Benalmadena Costa.

Every Monday: Arts and Crafts Fair in Benahavis at 8pm in the Main Square in Benahavis.

Every Tuesday: The Costa Women Coffee Club meet every second Tuesday at 10am – 12.30pm for coffee, chats and other activities and is a social group designed to get ladies of all ages together. It’s best to join the group via Facebook or contact Emma on 608 408 771.

Every Tuesday: Dance with JiveSpain Miraflores Resturant from 8pm - 11pm. For more information see website at www.jivespain.com or call Colin on: 635 717 211.

Every Tuesday: 11 am – 1 pm Age Care Coffee Morning at the Baptist Church, Calahonda, where people can chat, share experiences & take part in a variety of activities. Call tel: 952 933 409 for information.

Every Wednesday: at 11:30am the Malaga Picasso Museum is offering free guided tours in English which is included with the price of admission Every Wednesday: Dance with JiveSpain at El Campanario, San Pedro, from 8pm - 11pm.

Every Thursday: Dance with JiveSpain at Tikitano Restaurant, Estepona from 8pm - 11pm.

Every Thursday: Market at Calypso, Calahonda Every Thursday: 10 am – 12.30 pm: Age Care Drop In where people can chat, share experiences and find out about living in Spain at Manilla Bar, Paseo Maritimo, Los Boliches, Fuengirola.

Every Thursday: Flea Market from 9am next to Aldi in Las Lagunas, plenty of parking.

Every Friday: Dance with JiveSpain at Hotel El Goleto, Duquesa from 8pm - 11pm.

Every Sunday: Dance with JiveSpain take over the dance floor at Atalaya Park Hotel.

Every Sunday: Flea Market EVERY Sunday 10am till 2pm at Calypso, Calahonda.

Every Sunday: FAMA have a car boot sale at the Hippodrome from 9am - 2pm.

Every Sunday: Craft Market every Sunday in the Marbella Marina on the Teresa Zabell Pier: 12-6pm.

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If you have an event, fundraiser or anything else please let us know... email: editor@costalinkmagazine.com phone: 951 216 131 or 663 061 669

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ocal Info Emergency Numbers

---

Central number for Fire, Police & Ambulance National Police Local Police Guardia Civil dica

Medical

112 091 092 062

Emergency 061 Ambulance Marbella 902 505 061 Ambulance Coin 952 453 267

Train Timetables 902 240 202 Airports Malaga 952 048 844 Gibraltar 956 773 026

Health Centres

Marbella 952 769 946 Coin 952 452 767 San Pedro 952 787 700

Town Halls

Marbella 952 761 100 San Pedro 952 453 020 La Cala de Mijas 952 493 208 Fuengirola 952 589 300 Estepona 952 801 100

Fire Brigade

Emergency number 080 Marbella 952 774 349 Estepona 952 804 483 Fuengirola 952 461 046

Consulates

British Ireland Denmark Sweden Germany France U.S.A

952 952 952 952 952 952 952

Marbella Coin Estepona Fuengirola San Pedro

952 771 442 952 822 818 952 822 818 952 467 457 952 785 252

352 475 226 604 212 226 474

300 108 373 383 442 590 891

Tourist Information

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Transport

Bus Stations Marbella 952 764 400 Coin 952 450 366 San Pedro 952 781 396 Estepona 952 800249 For a list of complete times www.andalucia.com/travel/bus

Markets

Monday - Marbella (fairground site on east side) Tuesday - Fuengirola (fairground near Los Boliches) Wednesday - Calypso (Mijas Costa & Estepona (Avda. Juan Carlos) La Cala - Feria ground Thursday - San Pedro (Recinto Ferial) Alhaurin el Grande - (La Fama) Saturday - Coin (Calle Urbano Pineda) & Nueva Andalucia (Next to Centro Plaza the Bullring).

La Cala - Feria ground.

Sunday - Puerto Estepona (Marina).

Cinemas

All the Cinemas listed below show films in English as well as Spanish. Call first to check what is showing that week.

Marbella: Cinesur Plaza del Mar 952 766 941 La Ca単ada 902 333 231 Puerto Banus: Gran Marbella 952 810 077 Coin: La Trocha 951 315 039 Fuengirola Cinesur Miramar 902 221 622

Chemists

24 hour chemist Urb. Artola, Ctra. Cadiz Km 194. Marbella.

Tel: 952 83 25 89

Taxis

Marbella Taxis 952 774 488 Mijas Costa Taxis 952 476 593

Diary Dates

12/10/2014: Spanish National holiday - Businesses will be closed.

06/10/214 - 12/102014: Fuengirola Feria.

26/10/2014: Clocks go back.

31/10/2014: Halloween.

01/11/2014: All Saints Day Public Holiday - Businesses and schools will be closed.

if you would like to sponsor this page please call 951 216 131

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October 2014 Costa Link Magazine_Editorial Layout 9/24/14 2:25 PM Page 70

S TA R S I GN S

A look at what's in store for you during October 2014.....

Capricorn

Aquarius

Pisces

Aries

Taurus

Gemini 70

Capricorn, the location of Venus, the planet of love, will massively highlight your charm, with benefits both with your love and social life. Your popularity in a relationship or to find a new partner will make you stand out above the crowd. It is also possible that you'll be attracted to people with a good image who have power and prestige. On the other hand, the Moon eclipse in October 2014 could mean a sudden change with a possible or a sudden decision regarding cohabitation or administration of shared money. On the work front collaborations will acquire more importance, social contacts can help when trying to solve some problems and they can even contribute to success. Otherwise, October 2014 can bring Capricorn people unexpected opportunities, out of the ordinary events, novelty or changes. Although don't rely on others too much! People sometimes change their minds and forget promises.

Aquarius, relationships will flourish in October 2014.It's about relationships in general: you'll socialise a lot, you'll meet new people and start new friendships. You'll feel an urge, a current that will draw you to the others - and the others to you. The same tendency will be true for your relationships too, they will go through a dynamic, constructive period to make them change for the better. October 2014 will be a good time to make plans and join powers with the partner, with the aim of carrying out a joint project. If you're looking for your soulmate, you can meet somebody with the same vision and life plan as you. On the work front it will be luck all round with a lot of change. Expect for new contracts to appear and it is also possible that you get involved very actively in a new project, maybe even as the boss. You'll be in a great physical shape and you'll have admirable morale all throughout October 2014.

Pisces, Mercury, will start its retrograde movement on October 4th on October 10th Venus also gets involved in the movement, it’s possible that you'll face some troubles that have to do with somebody or something with money, or that you'll find out about a hidden thing that bothers you. Money seems to be an important issue this month though and, as it looks, it also seems connected to the accommodation maybe family or your parents. It'll be an active and ambitious month at work you'll make great efforts to prove what you can do; you’ll assert yourself to advance. Your projects will flow easily and speed up, you will be able to focus on objectives. You'll have an improved capacity to work and to cope with effort when you set your mind to something very well defined, especially if this is what your image depends on. Approach financial issues rationally, in an organized way, with reserve and caution!

Aries, until October 23rd, the Sun and Venus will radiate and energize your love life. Under this double influence, love and thoughts of it will represent the nucleus around which almost all the thoughts and actions of Aries people will gravitate. Be ready for new challenges - or for some old ones to be reactivated. At work, October 2014 will be an ambitious period that will favour development and change. Mars, together with Jupiter and Uranus, will form a grand plan that will bring you energy, enthusiasm, and action. You'll have lots of new ideas, full of boldness and originality, you'll easily identify opportunities and explore them rapidly obtaining maximum effects. Important financial operations will not be recommended this month try and put off decisions until November. Try to control your emotions and to act as rationally as possible!

Taurus, don't expect October 2014 to be a month in which everything will go according to the plan! Mars has big plans: it wants to change or bring something new to your domestic or private life.

Mercury will also be retrograde in the second half of October 2014. You should expect special events with an impact on your relationship or on your partner's life. Unexpected developments may also involve your finances or career. Taurus' relationships will have an important say in October 2014, regardless if they are sentimental or professional. October 2014 will be an active month at the financial level, in which you'll deal with business, investments or other activities that are related to banks, insurance maybe even the tax office.

Organise your work carefully and don't take any anything on you can’t handle or don’t have time for!

Gemini, looking for love this month? Then look no further Mars, the planet of energy, action and passion, will cross Gemini's house of relationships. It will excite you, challenge you, awaken your interest and wishes - and trigger events. Fortunately, Mars will be well supported by Venus, Jupiter and Uranus, so the events it will bring should be positive, constructive, happy. In some cases it can be about a joint effort of the two members of the couple leading to success and fulfillment. In other cases, about an accomplishment of your partner. In October 2014 your professional success will be stimulated by group partnerships and projects, but will be marked by rivalry and competition. As for the Moon eclipse, it could influence your finances and not necessarily positively, so act cautiously especially in the first half of October 2014.

Organise your life this month with enough rest take time out where and when you can.

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Cancer

Leo

Virgo

Libra

Scorpio

Sagittarius

Cancer, October 2014 will bring Cancerians a greater need for privacy, warmth and tenderness. It doesn't seem to be a very expansive month, marked by who-knows-what burning passion or lust for adventure, but rather oriented towards peaceful life, home and family. It is possible that you'll be preoccupied with the redecoration of your home to make it more beautiful or more comfortable. Or maybe you'll consider buying or renting a new place. At work, October 2014 you will benefit from a great period! Everything will work to your advantage and if you know what to do, you'll get anywhere you want, no matter how far. Things will develop at a rapid pace this month deals and decisions will need to be made quickly. Be ready for some change in your career!

Leo, October 2014 distinguishes itself by an overwhelming tendency towards adventure of the romantic kind. With Jupiter located precisely in Leo and with the help of Mars, passion can outburst suddenly and it'll be difficult, if not impossible, to control. You’ll be attracted to quick-thinking people, who will stimulate you intellectually as well as physically, whom you can have conversations and exchange ideas and opinions with. At work you'll be attracted to grand projects, you'll be under the impression that all objectives can be reached. In many cases it will be true and many Leos will benefit from special opportunities in October 2014. No matter how high you aim, the important thing is to keep your feet on the ground, to assess risks and to stay away from large-scale actions. Express yourself creatively or intellectually! You have a sharp mind and great expression power.

Virgo, October 2014 should be a rather peaceful month as far as relationships go. You'll not be overflowing with romance in fact, it seems that you'll place emphasis on the practical aspects of life, rather than on the romantic ones. This month on the home front discussions will primarily be focused on money or work. Some Virgos could feel that the partner does not give them enough attention anyway expect a certain amount of domestic turbulence. On the work front you can expect a lot of agitation, surprising developments, changes of situation and stress. It's recomended that you are careful how you manage your money and that you avoid risks and speculations. Be careful with decisions, documents, calculations and anything that requires concentration! It's time you cultivated your patience and discipline try to alleviate prolonged nervous tension.

Libra, unexpected turns can always happen - this should be the motto of October 2014 as far as your star sign is concerned. Venus, the planet of love, will be enhancing your needs and your capacity to attract, making for special emphasis to given this month to your love life. There are signs though that suggest possible changes, surprising developments, significant events this will be at the focus of the Moon eclipse. When it comes to work this month October 2014 will be a month rich in activities and contacts that will keep you active. Don't expect things to always work as you have planned! The eclipses in October 2014 (a Sun eclipse and a Moon eclipse) announce unusual events both your career and the finance department. It's recommended that you concentrate on what is important and that you relax as often as you feel like it try and keep the life/work balance in check.

Scorpio, you have probably had happier times and happier times are on the way. At the moment though, October 2014 doesn't hold out much promise if you are single. The evening of 23rd October 2014 will bring an unusual phenomenon though: a Sun eclipse will take place, in tight conjunction with Venus, which has just arrived in Scorpio. It's a configuration that announces a very exciting end of the month, marked by passion, impulsive attitude and surprises. See we told you it would be ok! On the work front basically, so that you can benefit from the favorable astral conditions in October 2014 you'll need to be bold and to welcome the changes. Follow your ambitions courageously! You can fulfill them. Expect for fate to take you by surprise and for luck to come along when and where you least expect it!

Sagittarius, Mercury, will be in retrograde movement this month so that your love life will not be exactly easy. In October 2014 it's possible that the focus will move back to some older situations that haven't been settled at the right time, you'll need to analyse a problem in detail then you’ll be able to move on. After these issues are sorted out you will have a good period to have fun together with the partner, to participate in shared social activities and to make future plans together. With work and general life it's time for action! Mars will be lending you more dynamism and initiative. Financially, you'll benefit from a certain comfort, but you are not recommended to take risks. Take action strategically, calmly and without haste! For a good physical and mental equilibrium, in October 2014 you are recommended to exercise more than usual.

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puzzle Link The Words

Solutions on page 84

it out

In each of these puzzles, three words are listed. All you have to do is find another word that can preceed each of these 3 words.

1)

____

OPERA

SUDS

3)

_____

TAPE

GAME

2) 4) 5)

____

_____ ____

MOVIE WORD

MASTER

STONE

BELL

MOON

BOW

OUT

LIGHTS

EVIDENCE

WAY

Guess The Celeb

A

B

Sudoku

74

Brain Teaser

The Prisoners Hats: You are in prison with Barry & Albert. The 3 of you are in a line looking straight ahead. You’re in front, then Barry, then Albert. A guard has 3 black & 2 white hats. He randomly puts one on each of your heads. Albert can see your hat and Barry’s, Barry can see yours, and you can see no one’s. None of you know what colour you have on your own head. The guard says, “if anyone call tell me 100% certainty the colour of your own hat, uttering no one else’s, you may all go free.” He tells Albert to answer first. Albert is a very honest and intelligent person, but he says, “I don’t know, there’s no way of knowing for sure.” The guard then asks Barry. Barry is also intelligent and rational, but he also cannot tell. He comes to you, and you say the colour of your hat with 100% certainty. The guard has no choice but to release all 3 of you. What colour hat were you wearing and how did you know?

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Crossword

Across:

1. Played at international level (6) 4. It could be wide or silver (6) 9. Twosome (3) 10. Breed of cat (7) 11. Clear, plain (7) 12. Final sum (5) 13. Wading bird (5) 15. Mourning (5) 20. Granny Smith for example (5) 22. _____ Oyster is a hangover cure (7) 24. Pardon you from your sins (7) 25. Slang for diamonds (3) 26. Followed an eating plan (6) 27. Put on a show (6) Down: 1. Scrounges (6) 2. Pledge (7) 3. Follow on as a result (5) 5. Roman town in North of England (7) 6. Apply force or influence (5) 7. Stinging plant (6) 8. Irritable (5) 14. Supervise (7) 16. Piece of jewellery (7) 17. Limited to a certain sum (6) 18. Witch's hex/charm (5) 19. Fight off attack (6) 21. Stage in development (5) 23. Spy or representative (5)

Name The Film

A Steven

Spielberg directs this 1982 classic. A troubled child summons the courage to help a friendly alien escape Earth and return to his home-world.

B

Based on a true story. Paranormal investigators Ed and Lorraine Warren work to help a family terrorized by a dark presence in their farmhouse. (2013)

Say What You See...

CRYCRYCRY

BANK

aallll

daeh ii ym

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The Jokes page

Jokes page

What is a vampire’s favorite fruit?

A nectarine!

motioning towards Mrs. Jones.

A little boy comes down to breakfast. Since they live on a farm,his mother asks if he had done his chores. “Not yet,” said the little boy. His mother tells him no breakfast until he does his chores. He's a little hacked off, so when he goes to feed the chickens, he kicks a chicken. He goes to feed the cows, and he kicks a cow. He goes to feed the pigs, and he kicks a pig. He goes back in for breakfast and his mother gives him a bowl of dry cereal.

“How come I don't get any eggs and bacon? Why don't I have any milk in my cereal?” he asks.

“Well,” his mother says, “I saw you kick a chicken, so you don't get any eggs for a week. I saw you kick the pig, so you don't get any bacon for a week either. I also saw you kick the cow, so for a week you aren't getting any milk.” Just then, his father comes down for breakfast and kicks the cat half way across the kitchen. The little boy looks up at his mother with a smile, and says, “Are you going to tell him, or should I”.

"Right again," said the minister, smiling.

Before long, Mr. Jones again winked off.

However, this time the minister did not notice. As he picked up the tempo of his sermon, he made a few motions that Mrs. Jones mistook as signals to bayonet her husband with the hatpin again.

What do skeletons say at the front door?

"Crick or creak!"

One day Mrs. Jones went to have a talk with the minister at the local church. "Reverend," she said, "I have a problem, my husband keeps falling asleep during your sermons. It's very embarrassing. What should I do?"

"I have an idea," said the minister. "Take this hatpin with you. I will be able to tell when Mr. Jones is sleeping, and I will motion to you at specific times. When I motion, you give him a good poke in the leg."

In church the following Sunday, Mr. Jones dozed off. Noticing this, the preacher put his plan to work. "And who made the ultimate sacrifice for you?" he said, nodding to Mrs. Jones.

"Jesus!", Jones cried as his wife jabbed him the leg with the hatpin.

76

"Yes, you are right, Mr. Jones," said the minister. Soon, Mr. Jones nodded off again.

Again, the minister noticed. "Who is your redeemer?" he asked the congregation,

"God!" Mr. Jones cried out as he was stuck again with the hatpin.

The minister asked, "And what did Eve say to Adam after she bore him his 99th son?"

Mrs. Jones poked her husband, who yelled, "You stick that goddamned thing in me one more time and I'll break it in half and shove it up your bottom!"

"Amen," replied the congregation.

Two young boys walked into a pharmacy one day, picked out a box of tampons and proceeded to the checkout.

The man at the counter asked the older boy, "Son, how old are you?"

"Eight," the boy replied.

The man continued, "Do you know what these are used for?"

The boy replied, "Not exactly, but they aren't for me. They're for him. He's my brother. He's four. We saw on TV that if you use these, you would be able to swim and ride a bike. Right now, he can't do either one. "

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78

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80

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82

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puzzle Trivia Quiz Answers

1) Pisces 2) Fast breathing 3) Bunny 4) Clavicle 5) Boar 6) Cholera 7) Tributary 8) Moses 9) Tom and Barbara Good 10) Bedknobs and Broomsticks 11) John Travolta and Olivia Newton John 12) Pablo Picasso 13) Bernard Cribbins 14) Philadelphia Story 15) Dangerously in Love (2003) 16) Cher 17) Ghostbusters 18) 10 19) Mark Selby 20) Blue 21) 6 feet 1 inch 22) Jamie’s Comfort Food 23) 3 24) Lennox Lewis 25) Robert Palmer 26) Pet Shop Boys 27) Michael Jackson 28) Stelios Haji-Ioannou 29) Margaret Thatcher 30) Beatrix Potter

Answers from 26, 74 & 75

it out

Link The Words

1)Soap 2)Blue 3) Video 4)Cross 5)Head

Guess The Celeb a) Simon Cowell b) Kylie Minogue

Brain Teaser

The Prisoners Hats – Answer You are wearing a Black hat.

To solve this brainteaser you have to think about what the other men couldn’t see.

Albert could not have seen 2 white hats, or he would have known that his hat was black. Albert either saw a black and white hat or black and black hat so he had no certainty which colour he was wearing himself. Hearing Albert & knowing he could not have seen 2 white hats, the only way for Barry to have certainty is if he sees a white hat in front so he knows his own is black. However, Barry was also unsure, meaning you must be wearing a black hat.

Crossword Solution

Sudoku Solution

Name The Film

a) E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial (1982) b) The Conjuring (2013)

Say What You See

84

1) Cry all the way to the bank 2) All in All 3) Eyes in the back of my head

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