Next Right Action

August was a rough month. My roommate and I were served with eviction papers so the new owners could remodel our apartment and then double the rent. This news came just as I was studying for a financial test for work scheduled at the end of the month. I was anxious about how to handle both of these huge events.

Soon after the eviction notice, I learned that a cyst on my pituitary gland had returned. How was I going to move, pass an exam, and then deal with the possibility of another surgery? I moved back to my parent’s home where I could study peacefully. Little did I know that my parent’s marriage was suffering some extreme burdens, fueled by their addictions. Living with them as they worked out their issues was extremely painful and left me exhausted and emotional. Although it was tough being around them while I was preparing for the test, it was a joy to be with my little niece and sister, who also live with my parents.

That same week, I met with an FA friend who lives in another city and we attended a baseball game. After the game, we walked to my car and there was glass everywhere. Someone had broken into my car and stole my expensive camera, my make-up, my prescription eyeglasses, all my earrings, and a curling iron. They were kind enough to leave my Tupperware from lunch and dinner, though! I was beside myself, but I remained calm and took the next right action, using the tools I have learned in Program to carry me through this hard time. I had the window fixed, a good friend who works at a department store gave me samples of make-up, and I used my back-up pair of glasses. Thank you God, I have a loving boyfriend and such a great friend in FA.

I’ve been through enough hard things in Program to know that this bad time would pass.

The night before my test, I felt myself leaning on God to shut off my brain so I could sleep. I woke up feeling refreshed, excited, and ready to “slay the dragon.” My test was at a location an hour away, so I left plenty of time to get there, but on my way, a truck came to a sudden stop and I saw my life flash before my eyes as my airbag deployed. My glasses were thrown off, my lunch was upside down on the floor, and everything was thrown around. I couldn’t believe I was alive. My dad came to get me right away and took me to my 9 a.m. test site. I took the test and unfortunately didn’t pass, but I was so lucky to be alive that I really didn’t care. I knew I’d get to retake it in 30 days, and thank God I was alive to pass or fail; it just didn’t matter. My best friend picked me up after the test, I talked to my sponsor, and my boyfriend got my car towed to the auto body shop. I went to the ER to get checked and took a few days off work to recover from this month-long series of events. And it turned out that my new cyst was asymptomatic and would just have to be monitored every six months.

Later, I was sitting and eating my weighed-and-measured lunch and began to recount all the things that had gone wrong in the previous month and I couldn't wait to tell my sponsor about them. But then, the still small voice inside asked, "Is this lunch you are eating weighed and measured? Then there truly are no problems." Instead of calling my sponsor with my laundry list of self-pity, I was ecstatic to tell her about my discovery that I was totally, without a shadow of a doubt, abstinent from flour and sugar and all the other substances that I had used to block out life. I could tell her that everything was just fine.