Parting is Such Sweet Sorrow: Saying goodbye to an eating problem. How to change your relationship with food.
he following article deals with the impact of loss as it T pertains to changing one’s relationship with food. As a psychotherapist and eating disorder specialist this is a subject that I believe needs more understanding and validation.
loss of living a healthy life physically, psychologically, emotionally and spiritually.
For many people their relationship with food needs to change from the habitual dysfunctional one to a healthy functional one. This is a process that needs to be In addition, I will address the topic of food and its addressed on a continuum in order to embrace a healthy connection to the holiday. This is one example, albeit a relationship. If this change is not adequately accepted, major one, that exemplifies one of the many trials and the return to the problem is likely to be imminent, thus tribulations experienced by individuals. leading to the original imprisonment, shame, anger and hopelessness. Know this is the first step to resolving and How one approaches loss in its many forms is a major dealing with this issue. This reduces the likelihood of component in the goal of ending an eating disorder or returning to the eating disorder or problem. However, it eating problem. The emptiness one experiences is eventually filled through the courage to say goodbye to this necessitates living through bereavement, grief and negative coping mechanism. My purpose is to call attention to the necessity of loss and grief in order to permanently change eating disorders and/or problems. Although the relationship with food holds different meanings for people, it can become all-encompassing for those suffering with anorexia nervosa, bulimia nervosa, binge eating, overeating or obesity. These are a few quotes from people I have worked with; perhaps you have heard similar remarks. “I don’t eat that much.” “Why can’t I be normal?” “I am so ashamed of myself.” “Will I be able to accept the insecurity I feel?” “I accept my newfound sanity; I want to hold onto it.” In order to grow out of an eating disorder or problem and grow into a life without it, one must give up dependencies, expectations, illusions and attachments to this negative connection. Eating disorders or problems often represent an attachment representative of a parent or best friend. Unfortunately, this may segue into a dependency on them. Some things that may have felt uncomfortable at times become comfortable. One literally wears her/his eating disorder/problem. The ultimate result of this is the 68
October 2021 InSession | FMHCA.org
