Imagine - Issue 08

imagine FEBRUARY 2015

SEXUALITY?

6 FACTS ABOUT THERAPY

EXPERT TALKS ABOUT CONTINUUMS

LOOKING AT THE EVIDENCE

MENS VITAMINS DO THEY HELP?

HOLIDAYS TO GIZA FABULOUS TRIPS ABROAD

FOUNTAIN OF YOUTH

LA MIA KITCHETTE TOP NOSH FROM THE ITALIAN LADY

HOW DO YOU KNOW YOU ARE GAY? LIVE THE LIFE YOU WERE BORN TO LIVE!

TRIPS TO TEMPT YOU

PLAN YOUR 2015 HOLIDAYS

HOW TO OVERCOME THOSE NASTY NEGATIVE THOUGHTS

FEATURES 04

Mens Vitamins, Not The Fountain Of Youth, But They Help

LIFESTYLE 08

How Do I Know if I'm Gay?

10 Giza Journeys Are planned With Regard To A Great Deal Of marvelous Sites

FOOD & DRINK 12

La Mia Kitchenette

WELLBEING 16 Changing Your Thinking to Change Your Life 20

Key steps to overcoming negative thoughtsÂ

FROM THE EDITOR Welcome to February issue of IMAGINE. There are many exciting articles in this month including some top nosh from La Mia Kitchenette. I want to talk about resilience and answer to the myth. Yes it CAN be taught!

Resilience is the positive capacity/attitude to cope with stress and adverse life events. This attitude may result in a manner of coping in the individual “bouncing back” to a previous state of normal functioning, or using the experience of exposure to adversity to produce a “stoic effect” and function better than expected (much like an inoculation gives one the capacity to cope well with future exposure to disease).experience of exposure to adversity to produce a “stoic effect” and function better than expected (much like an inoculation gives one the capacity to cope well with future exposure to disease).Resilience is most commonly understood as a process, and not a trait of an individual.

Editor In Chief

More recently, there has also been evidence that resilience

Matt Broadway-Horner, matt@imaginemagazines.com

can indicate a capacity to resist a sharp decline in functioning even though a person temporarily appears to get worse. A

Associate Editor

child, for example, may do poorly during critical life transitions

Susie Smith, info@imaginemagazines.com

(like entering School) but experience problems that are less severe than would be expected given the many risks the child faces.

Matt http://www.cbtinthecity.com/shop/coaching-consultation.html

Contributing Writer Brian Thomson

Contributing Writer Elisabetta Ludica

Art Director Pradeep De Silva pradeep@imaginemagazines.com

Graphic Artist Wayne Thomas

Circulation Officer Brian Morton brian@imaginemagazines.com

Sales Officer Rosangelie

http://www.imaginemagazines.com • 3

Mens Vitamins, Not The Fountain Of Youth, But They Help.

Can "Mens Vitamins" help a man regain his youthful vim and vigor, this is a question that doctors are being asked thousands of times each day. By Dr Robert Buckley

4

http://www.imaginemagazines.-

Are there Mens supplements available to help a man regain his youthful vim and vigor, this is a question that doctors are being asked thousands of times each day. The simple answer is yes. Understand that there are many reasons men are feeling run down. Thus there are many different mens vitamins to choose from.

The mens vitamins product you use should be specific for your symptom.

Can "Mens Vitamins" help a man regain his youthful vim and vigor, this is a question that doctors are being asked thousands of times each day. The simple answer is yes. Understand that there are many reasons men are feeling run down. Thus there are many different mens vitamins to choose from. The mens vitamins product you use should be specific for your symptom.

If you research mens vitamins you should be able to match how you are feeling with a product

If you research mens vitamins you

. There is ample documentation

Mens Vitamins And feeling Yourself

should be able to match how you are

available to support mens vitamins

Again.

feeling with a product with a product

as a viable option in the treatment of

to make you feel better.

ADAM. But taking a mens vitamin is

There are many products available

not a panacea, it is just one option in

that can help you feel yourself again.

what should be a multi pronged ap-

Most of these mens vitamins should

proach which should include:

include several of the following in-

Mens Vitamins And Hypogonadism.

gredients as these are the accepted First off, what is hypogonadism? Well

• exercise

some call it male menopause, the most accepted medical name seems

this as a Top Ten list if you will.

• mens vitamins

to be Androgen Deficiency in Aging Males ( ADAM ). The array of symptoms include loss of muscle mass, fatigue, depression, erectile dysfunction, decrease in libido, an overall decrease in energy levels and even hot flashes and or night sweats.

supplements to quell ADAM. Think of

• stress reduction • nutrition/diet • herbs and supplements

!

Photo by Wayne Thomas

6

www.imaginemagazines.com

Top 10 recommended by Dr Robert Buckley 1. DHEA

This should only be used as a guide when choosing a mens vitamin prod-

2. Maca 3. Horny Goat Weed 4. Yohimbe 5. Ginseng

uct, talking with your doctor is always the best way to go. There is a whole specialty field developing in Medicine called anti-aging that specifically addresses these issues. If you feel you are suering from any of these symptoms seek advice from a qualified med-

6. Ashwagandha

ical professional, start exercising, and

7. Damiana

amin.

8. Chaste tree 9. L-arginine 10. Fish oil or Omega-3 supplements

don’t forget to take a quality mens vit-

The main thing that you need to remember is that you have to do what is best for you.

How Do I Know if I'm Gay? Is a Continuum?

by Peter James Field

Coming to terms with a person's

In the end, only you will be able to

gay. A person might realize they are

sexual identity can be confusing --

decide if you are gay or not, but

gay from a very young age, and oth-

especially if you're a teenager. In this

there are some questions and infor-

ers may realize it much later. Some

helpful article, a leading British psy-

mation you can consider as you're

young gay people may feel dierent,

chotherapist explains how you can

trying to sort out your feelings.

but be unsure about why or how they

better understand your sexual identity.

Knowing whether or not you

might be gay is not an easy question to answer for everyone. Some people feel sure of their sexual orientation from an early age and others take much longer to discover it.

What Does It Mean To Be Gay? Gay people are sexually attracted to and may fall in love with other people

are dierent from their friends or peers.

Forget What You Think You Know About Gay People

of the same gender. They may also feel some degree of attraction to

There are a lot of stereotypes out

another gender, but they identify as

there about gay people, but just like

any stereotype, you can't assume that they are true for every person.

There is no particular mannerism or look that is "gay." Just like any group of people, preferences,

The best understanding that we have of sexuality is that it is fluid and very individual.

looks, interests and style varies a great deal from person to person.

Just because you are gay does not mean that everyone will automatically know. Most gay people don't wear banners proclaiming their orientation, and chances are you already know many people who are gay, but just don't fit into the 'gay stereotype'.

What Do My Sexual Fantasies Mean?

Sexual fantasies are not always easy to interpret, but research has shown that many people who do not identify as gay have had same gender fantasies at some point.

Just because you might fantasize about a same gender sexual experience, doesn't necessarily mean that you're gay. Also, many young people have a lot of intense sexual fantasies about dierent people and situations.

Usually as they get older their feel-

But there are some further questions

ings and orientation will become

you can consider. When you dream

more clear.

or have a fantasy, is it usually about

Sexuality Is Fluid.

If you're trying to make sense of your feelings, it might help to know that sexuality doesn't fall solely into two categories - gay or straight. The best understanding that we have of sexuality is that it is fluid and very individual. Some people feel 100% gay or 100% straight, while others might feel like they fall somewhere on the continuum between gay and straight.

Unfortunately, no one can tell you 100% if you are gay or not, only you can know that.

the same gender? Do you have romantic and loving feelings towards someone of the same gender? Do you feel dierent from others that are of your same gender? Do you regularly have strong feelings for the same gender? Even if your answers to these questions are yes, you still might feel unclear about your sexual orientation. That's okay. It may take some time for you to feel sure about it. For many people it helps to reach out to others who have been in the same position.

Giza Journeys Are planned With Regard To A Great Deal Of marvelous Sites Noise and Play of light

by Steve John

Trip to Cairo to visit fantastic Pyramids of Giza Holidays, the Egyptian museum and old part of Cairo from Taba by exclusive automobile with Private Egyptologist tourist guide.

Invest a day trip to Cairo from Sharm El Sheikh and discover the most effective of Cairo monuments and go to the great and the big Sphinx, also you will certainly discover the Valley Temple and rare precious Antiquities at the Egyptian Gallery, note the prize of Tut-Ankh-Amun, and the just recently uncovered Queen Hatshepsut Mommy. Delight in

of the Giza pyramids.

Learned about the strange and fascinating record of the Pharaohs

an exciting Sound & Play of light at Giza Pyramids which will narrate the intriguing mystical past of the Pharaohs and the beginning of the Pyramids and regarding the famous Kings such as Tut-Ankh-Amun, Akhenaton and Queen Nefertiti and other kings and Queens.

Convenience Trip Egypt tour guide will certainly select you up from the hotel you are staying in to attend the theatrical and bright Noise and Play of light of the Giza pyramids. Learned about the strange and fascinating record of the Pharaohs. The first step in building a pyramid was to select an appropriate website. Due to the fact that the west was where the sunlight set and where the dead were believed to get in the underworld, this had to be on the west party of the Nile.

The pyramids likewise needed to be located on the high ground, far from the threat of flooding at the time of the Nile's inundation.

Nonetheless, it could not be also far from the financial institution since the river would certainly be made use of to move blocks of great top quality sedimentary rock for the outer casing from Tura, on the other side of the Nile.

The site picked would certainly go to a factor on the desert stage that would confirmed a firm rock base efficient in assisting the fantastic weigh of the pyramid without any kind of risk of cracking. It would likewise need to be within very easy reach of the resources, to make sure that the king can visit examine the structure job whenever he wished.Giza Egypt located in the north Eastern part of Africa, is most likely the prominent destinations. Egypt is normally a wasteland, an extension from the Sahara Desert. This land is primarily wild, part of the Sahara Wild. Egypt is exceptionally renowned because of its old culture, historical locations and design. The ancestry in the old Egyptian world still stays with the land. This spectacular country is additionally referred because the area of amazing world and wonders. Egypt is entirely on the financial institutions of lovely Stream Nile. This area is showcased with amazing and beautiful historic, activities, monoliths and culture tourist destinations. In this specific area 90 varieties of the spots of interest are placed around the monetary organization of Stream Nile. Hence, trip

in the rile stream is fantastic choice to investigate the Egyptian residential property in even more detail. Egypt is ideal Giza Holidays to enjoy your escape with your family and friends folks. This place offer differed journeys and tasks with a solid record, remarkable spot, values and fantastic worthwhile of for the cash. Since of its excellent pyramids and various other historical monoliths, Egypt is extremely prominent. Egypt will certainly be the perfect destination if you wish to make your travel memorable and satisfying. This area has gorgeous shorelines and enjoyable weather all round the period. The pyramids of Cheap Holidays To Giza along with the Sphinx are most critical location around the Egypt expeditions. Nevertheless, the architectural elegance of pyramid mystifying. This sensational country has a variety of pyramids and also other ancient monoliths. If you have a problem with any of the Solutions supplied it must be brought to the prompt interest of our agent or the company straight whilst on the All Inclusive Giza Holidays. We will certainly then attempt to correct the situation quickly.

After return it is almost impossible to fix a scenario that could have been remedied throughout the Trip. Simply note that if you pick for any type of factor not to participate in any part of the program when on the trip, there will be NO refund for these solutions, as they are pre paid based on the number getting involved.

La Mia Kitchenette PAN BRIOCHE CON DATTERI E NOCI brioche with dates and walnuts

When Christmas is approaching there are a number of foods we can find in the shops and that we don't want our tables to be without. Walnuts, cranberries, chestnuts and more. One of my favourites has to be dates. All can be used in cooking and today, without an exception, I made a scrumptious brioche with these sweet treat and some walnuts. It is a bit of a long process but the end results are definitely worthwhile. For my brioche I used a ring tin but you don't have to as any round cake tin can do the job as well.

You will need: 500g strong white bread flour 60g caster sugar 1 tsp salt 10g fast action dries yeast 4 eggs 160ml warm milk 250g unsalted butter - at room temperature

10 dates - chopped50g walnuts - chopped 1 egg for the egg wash a knob of butter to grease the tin 1. Put the flour in a food processor fitted with a dough hook and add the sugar, salt on one side of the flour and the yeast on the other side 2. Add the eggs and milk and mix all the ingredient for one minute initially then turn it up to medium speed 3. Let the dough hook mix all the ingredients for three more minutes until it begins to form a dough 4. At this point, incorporate pieces of the softened butter and continue to mix on medium speed for a further four minutes 5. Add the dates and walnuts and mix gently with a spatula to avoid mashing the dates 6. The dough will be very soft and shiny. It will look sticky at this point but don't worry

Tip: Toast slices of leftover brioche, if any left, and spread a thin layer of butter. It's absolutely delicious!,

7. Turn the bowl and tip the mixture into a oiled large bowl and cover with cling film. Refrigerate for at least 4 hours until firm 8. After this time, tip the dough onto a lightly floured surface and cut into 10 equal pieces. Roll them well with the palm oh your hands 9. Grease a tin and place each ball inside it, in a circle and well tucked together. Cover again and rest for a further two hours out of the fridge until risen 10. In the meantime, preheat the oven 220C/ Fan 200C / 425F / Gas Mark 7.

11. Once the balls have risen as high as the rim of the tin or above, brush with the previously beaten eggwash and bake for 25-30 minutes 12. Test for readiness b inserting a screwer which should come out clean and dry

Payments are much easier from you devices when paying for services at CBT in the City

13. Remove and serve warm or cold Tip: Toast slices of leftover brioche, if any left, and spread a thin layer of butter.

It's absolutely delicious!

CBT in the City via iPhone & iPad

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Photo by Wayne Thomas

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Photo by Wayne Thomas

Slow down in this stressed free world and try developing self compassion rather than self esteem? For info call Matt 02074671508

Changing Your Thinking to Change Your Life Book Sample taken from Managing Depression using CBT

by Brian Thomson & Matt Broadway-Horner Negative thinking can seem like living in a prison in which fear inhibits you at work, stops you socialising and even makes you believe that any improvement is impossible. But

▶ Challenging negative thinking ▶ Replacing unhelpful thoughts ▶ Uncovering the causes of negative thoughts

you don’t have to live this way. You can challenge and replace this negativity, freeing yourself up to be more confident about changing your life for the better. In this chapter, you discover how to change your unhelpful negative automatic thoughts (NATs) and improve the way you feel. (I describe NATs in Chapter 2 and help you identify unhelpful thinking habits in Chapter 3.) I explain how to challenge your thinking errors and replace them with healthier rational alternative thoughts (RATs), which are based on sound evidence. I also look at assumptions you make about yourself, other people and the future – those vaguely conscious beliefs that you have about how you fit into the world.

They have an incredibly powerful influence over the way you interpret things and how you feel.

When you become more aware of your beliefs and the

Rise above depression with CBT

effect they have on your life, you can start to test them out and discover that the truth isn’t as negative as it sometimes seems. In doing so, you form more accurate, helpful beliefs that move you towards changing your life for the better.

Breaking Bad Thinking Habits Negative thoughts and beliefs have an adverse impact on your feelings and behaviour. If you want to overcome your depression, discovering how to recognise these bad thinking habits daily is vitally important. Testing out your thoughts and beliefs and challenging them every single day helps you to be successful at making the necessary changes in your thinking patterns and changing your thinking into a more helpful and accurate form.

You challenge negative beliefs by asking yourself two fundamental questions: ✓ Why do I believe this? ✓ What evidence do I have?

Sample taken from Chapter 4

Thinking is habitual, and changing bad habits takes conscious effort over a period of time. But the rewards you can gain in terms of overcoming your depression make this effort a price well worth paying.

which I look at in Chapter 3. When you feel depressed, you tend to think in an inaccurate and negative manner, so it is crucial to your process to realise this error. Although

Putting Your Unhelpful Thoughts on Trial

recognising your thinking errors takes a bit of effort, a few days of using your daily thought record (DTR) diligently, as I describe in this section, pays huge dividends in terms of changing your depressive thinking habits. A DTR, which I

Are you tired of being tied to your negative thoughts and

show in Table 4-1, has individual sections in which you list

beliefs? I hope so, because wanting to challenge and

the following:

change them is a great starting point for tackling your depression. In this section you put these tiresome NATs

✓ Your situation: Where are you? Who else is around? What

on trial, with you as main witness and prosecuting

are you doing? Try to include anything you think is signifi-

counsel. You don’t have to be a high-flying legal eagle –

cant in triggering your negative feelings.

just interrogate these unreliable witnesses, catch them out, and act on the evidence.

✓ Your feelings: What emotion(s) are you feeling? Name it (or them). What physical reaction in your body can you feel?

Rate how strong each emotion or reaction is on a scale of 1

Witnessing your thinking errors

to 10 (with 10 being the strongest). ✓ Your thoughts: Look at each of the emotions you listed in the preceding bullet point. Ask yourself what thoughts, im-

To get the most out of this section (and indeed chapter),

ages or memories are in your mind that would explain why

you need to be familiar with hot cognitions (negative

you feel this way. Rate how strongly you believe each

thoughts, images or memories that cause you to have

thought from 1 to 10 (10 is the highest rating).

Use the questions below to help you gather your evidence for and against each thought: 1. What evidence do I have for this thought?

2. What would other people think if this happened to them?

3. Would they jump to the same conclusion?

4. Do I have any evidence to contradict my interpretation of this thought?

5. Do people whose opinions I respect agree that this thought is accurate?

6. Is this just a NAT that jumps into my mind because I’m depressed?

7. Is this thought based on fact or just a reflection of how I feel?

8. Have I had thoughts like this in the past that turned out not to be true?

9. Am I ignoring any evidence against this thought?

10. Exactly what proof do I have for this thought?

Using thinking errors in this way is one of the key skills in helping you to become more objective about your thoughts and correct inaccurate thinking. Becoming familiar with thinking errors helps you move towards overcoming this problem, because when you make one of these thinking errors you automatically recognise it for what it is. As a result, this approach becomes a new, healthy way of thinking, having a huge positive impact on your mood. When you get used to identifying these unhelpful thinking errors, you begin to do so automatically and your thinking becomes more accurate and positive. By making a conscious effort for a few weeks, you will change your NATs to more helpful – and accurate – alternatives.

Finding a rational alternative thought When you have the hang of recognising your unhelpful NATs (by acting as a witness to them and challenging them using your DTR, as I describe in the preceding section), you’re able to start looking for alternative, more accurate and helpful thoughts, called rational alternative thoughts (or RATs for short). (Rodent-o-phobes don’t worry, these RATs are friendly and don’t have sharp teeth.) This is where you add a sixth and final column to your DTR: ✓ Your rational alternative thoughts: Your RATs should be truthful, accurate, balanced, and helpful. For example, ask how a healthy, confident individual would think in these circumstances.

This sixth column is arguably the most important one, and creating RATs a crucial skill to develop and practise. Finding realistic, honest but more helpful thoughts is what makes you feel better. (Table 4-3 shows a DTR completed with the sixth column in place.)

At this stage of the process, most people experience a strange disconnected feeling between their thoughts and the way they feel, and as a result think that the process isn’t working. They report finding a RAT that appears to be true but just doesn’t feel true. This experience is normal.

When you’ve been depressed for a while, your negative thinking and feelings have become such a habit that your emotions need time to catch up with your new healthier way of thinking.

Perseverance is the key. Just keep challenging your NATs and coming up with realistic RATs, and soon the latter become habitual. Then you start to reap the rewards in terms of feeling better.

Here are a few steps for producing a really good RAT: 1. Take an understanding and compassionate attitude.

Start appropriately; for example: ‘It’s understandable that I should feel a bit anxious about my boss checking my work. Most people in this situation would; however, because I’ve been depressed, I’m probably seeing things a bit more negatively than they actually are.’

2. Look at the thinking errors column of your DTR and the evidence and produce a statement that reflects a more accurate version of the situation. In this case it may be: ‘My boss is just doing his job; if he had a problem with my work he would have said so. I know that I’m doing my job reasonably well, so I have nothing to worry about.’

3. Ensure that the last bit of your RAT reflects what you’re going to do.

‘So I’m going to stop undermining my confidence by thinking negatively about the situation, and just get on with doing my job as best I can. If anything negative does happen, I’ll deal with it appropriately when the time comes.’

Key steps to overcoming negative thoughts If you try to manage Anxiety and Depression on your own, you will set yourself up for a fall.

Give it an inch and it will take a mile.

Anxiety and Depression needs to be cured by professionals. CBT in the City philosophy is to promote recovery, not to help people learn to live with it.

1.

4.

Regular exercise and sleep patterns, alongside a healthy diet, can make a big difference.

5.

Although Anxiety and Depression is a very individual affliction, you can benefit greatly from connecting with other sufferers through a positive support group.

.

2.

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) has been shown to have helped 75 per cent of those suffering from Anxiety and Depression and is recommended by the NHS. CBT is a talking therapy that focuses on the present, rather than delving into the past, and aims to challenge the thought patterns and behaviour that manifests from such tendencies.

3.

Knowledge is power when it comes toAnxiety and Depression: the more you understand the disorder the better your chances of overcoming it. Break Free From Anxiety and Depression: Managing Depression using CBT is an excellent book. A new book coming out soon Managing Depression Using Mindfulness based Cognitive Therapy

6.

Medication can be used alongside CBT in extreme cases. SSRIs (selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors) – also used in the treatment of depression and anxiety – are the most effective.

Going Deeper to Discover Causes In this section you delve a bit deeper into your mind to try and discover why you ended up thinking in this negative manner and what made you vulnerable to becoming depressed in the first place. To do so, you need to look at your values, beliefs and the rules you attempt to live by.

Most people have only a vague awareness of their beliefs and little understanding of how they came about. But by uncovering your beliefs and bringing them under conscious scrutiny, you can see how they affect your day-to-day thought processes and influence the way you interpret your experiences. Like everyone else, you view the world in a unique way, choosing to notice some aspects of your experiences while not even noticing others. Take a moment and focus your attention on what you’re experiencing right now. Use each of your senses in turn. You may be surprised by how much you experience at any given moment. But even more surprising can be how much information you don’t notice. For example, were you aware of the pressure of your bottom on the seat you’re sitting on or the sensation of your foot inside your shoe? Chances are that you weren’t. Your brain ignores these very familiar experiences

In an attempt to free up space for unfamiliar, more significant information.

In the same way, very familiar thought patterns often remain outside your awareness. Therefore they can exert a strong effect on the way you feel without ever being open to question or challenge. You just assume these familiar patterns are true, allowing them to have a powerful influence on the way you view the world and interpret your experiences. In fact, every- thing you experience is filtered through these assumptions.

So where do these assumptions come from and how do they develop? The short answer is that they come from your experience. Everything you experience as you grow gives you a message about where you fit in the world, how other people see you, and what kind of world you live in. You may know the classic poem ‘Children learn what they live’ by Dorothy Law Nolte. If you don’t, look it up on the Internet, because it sums up very succinctly the message of this section.

Take a look at the two different experiences of three-year-olds Shane and Barry while they play on a climbing frame in the park. Both Shane and Barry’s mothers behave in a caring and loving way towards them, but the differences in their behaviour are striking, as are the effects on their children (see Table 4-4).

This is a sample taken from the book Managing Depression using CBT by Thomson & Broadway-Horner

Most people have only a vague awareness of their beliefs and little understanding of how they came about…

Holocaust Memorial 75 years Remembering the genocides throughout the world.

We all need to take care of each other regardless of religion, ethnicity, culture, sexuality, gender etc

CBT IN THE CITY New challenges for the new year?

Why not try looking CBT in the City for your options from 1 of the 3 businesses: 1. Therapy Day services 2. Corporate Services 3. Public Services

Therapy Day Services for personal therapy looking at depression and anxiety our therapists are qualified from high quality Universities to a masters level and have up to 15 years experience in dealing with many aspects of mental ill health.

97% of clients are satisfied and 62% have referred a friend or relative to be seen.

The Corporate services is to help with problems that stop you being effective in your work. Like stress, time management etc which can hinder your performance and how you progress within the levels of promotion. Through out experts they can help you develop more resilience and self acceptance being the person you were born to be!

Public services have many demands on them to produce cost effective options for the public sector workforce and here we do set up wellbeing centres for staff. Also we have a schools project delivering packages for students delivered by the teachers in an empowering way helping both teacher and student

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