INBetween for parents caught in the middle of raising a teen & young adult
October/November 2014
HAVE A TEEN? MUST-READ ISSUE!
The New
Nene
From RHOA to Broadway & Glee Leakes on designing her own path
Stupid Stunts Your Kid Might be Trying
Texting & Driving Why teens aren’t getting the dangerous message modern Families
Real readers on the Ups & Downs of raising teens today
TINDER! 1
Is your child on the app for hookups? inbetween
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inbetween October/november 2014
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INSIGHT 7 10 minutes with... Bruce Croxon on
his biggest venture yet: Raising teens
THE NEW NENE
INFORM 9 Health & LIFE NEWS 12 TEENS & TINDER Is your child on the app for hookups?
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16 ask the expert Kimberly Moffit
tackles teens and porn
18 Natural flu fighters
Four ways to keep sickness at bay
Bruce Croxon
21 APPS THAT TRACK Want to know
what your teen is up to?
23 message not delivered
Why teens are still texting and driving 26 tricks are for kids
The latest dangerous teen trends
INSPIRE 29 modern family special
RECIPES FOR YOUR turkey leftoveRS
Real families: How they make it work
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36 THE NEW NENE NeNe Leakes shares her personal journey of inner growth and professional success 40 kickin’ fall boots Fall footwear
sure to inspire
INDULGE 45 FACING FALL How to keep your
skin supple year-round
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Is your teen on tinder?
48 LOVING LEFTOVERS Celeb chef
Daniel James Green serves up two recipes 52 A THINNER THANKSGIVING
Five tips to keep you on track 55 Travel: MontrEal
Couples’ getaway destination inbetween
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Rachel Naud
Art Director
Caroline Bishop Contributing Editor Jacqueline Kovacs Design assistant Rebecca Lasagna Website Manager Victor Chard
ONTRIBUTOR
Editor-In-Chief
Editorial/Social Media Intern Erin Hesselink
AGNES WYWROT
Agnes Wywrot is a portrait/event photographer and blogger based in Toronto. Graduating from the leading school in Halifax for digital arts & technical training, Agnes has built a business based on capturing authentic and charming photographs. With a passion for life, you can find Agnes exploring the city, captivated by a new activity or engaged in a yoga class. Check out more at www.vyvphotographic.com.
Business Development Manager Graham Farkas E-Publishing Issuu Digital Publishing Services
Contributors Susan Bosley, Peter Carter, Brittany Dempster, Andrea Donsky, Amanpreet Dhami, Graham Farkas, Megan Funnell, Daniel James Green, Jordana Handler, Erin Hesselink, Lara Hyde, Diane Kostick, Jacqueline Kovacs, Erika Lagyjanszki, Kimberly Moffit, Janet Sangalang, Jan Sippel, Jessica Blaine Smith, Agnes Wywrot. Copyright 2014 inBetween Magazine. All rights reserved. All images, unless otherwise noted, are Thinkstock.
No part of this magazine may be reproduced without the written permission of the publisher. The publisher accepts no responsibility for advertiser’s claims, unsolicited manuscripts, transparencies or other materials.
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For any questions, submissions or comments, please contact info@inbetween.ca inbetween
Peter Carter
Peter Carter is editor of Canada’s biggest trucking industry magazine, Today’s Trucking. Formerly a staff editor and family columnist with Chatelaine, Peter’s three full-grown post-teens are proof that successfully raising kids in the Internet age is not only possible but enjoyable. Read his story, “Teens and Tinder” on page 12.
Erin Hesselink
Erin Hesselink is the editorial intern for INBETWEEN. Originally from a town with a population of 50, Hesselink is now making a life in the big city of Toronto as a journalist, which is something she has wanted to do since she was eight years old. Still, despite her newfound independence, she still misses her parents…occasionally.
from Rachel
Editor portrait by Agnes wywrot
CHANGE WILL COME “I cannot tell you how much I have evolved and how much I have grown as a woman.” Those words, spoken by our cover girl, actress NeNe Leakes, show how much people can grow later in life. The Real Housewives of Atlanta star went from being in your face to the face of prime time, parlaying her reality success to starring roles in Glee, The New Normal and Fashion Police. And she didn’t stop there. This November, she’ll be hitting the stage on Broadway and has gone from diva to designer with her very own clothing line. And did we mention she’s also a mom to a teen, 20-something and, yes, even a grandma! Read how NeNe juggles it all on page 36. Nobody knows better than parents that raising children changes in the teen and young-adult years. Technology plays a bigger part than ever. Proof? Check out two of our features: One about how teens are still not getting the message about the dangers of texting and driving (page 23) and the second on apps that track your teen (page 21). Both are seemingly scary in their own way. While the former can result in death, the latter can result in a demise of its own — trust. I would love to hear your thoughts on our feature about teen-tracking apps.
But, of course, parenthood is full of happy moments. It’s a great time of year to get out walking as a group. You can put some pep in everyone’s step with some fashionable fall boots — see page 40 for some great boots for the whole family. It’s also time to talk turkey — as in what to do with those big-bird leftovers? We’ve got you covered on page 48. And to make sure there’s not too much to cover, flip to page 52 for hints on how to keep your waistline in check on the day that revolves around all things mashed and buttery. I hope you enjoy this issue of INBETWEEN as much as I loved putting it together. Whether you see something you like, dislike or have an idea, I would love to hear from you. Simply send an email to rachel@inbetween.ca. I look forward to hearing from you. ■
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L A - Z - B O Y
P R E S E N T S
FROM THE NEW URBAN ATTITUDES COLLECTION
Style is back with a whole new attitude. A living room stylish enough for a movie set doesn’t have to come with a movie star price tag. Meet the surprisingly affordable Urban Attitudes collection from La-Z-Boy. All the chic, urban-inspired style you want, with the La-Z-Boy comfort you expect. After all, why should movie stars have all the fun?
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© 2014 La-Z-Boy Incorporated
insight 10 MINUTES WITH...
BrucE Croxon
Photo BY: Christopher Wahl
The mogul on his biggest venture yet: Raising teens. by rachel naud
During a period when people were still using the personal ads, Croxon made his mark co-founding the online dating site Lavalife. More than 2,000,000 users logged onto the site that eventually sold for $180 million. Today, the ex-Dragon and philanthropist helms Round13 Capital, a company dedicated to investing in the growth stage of digital companies. Yet Croxon is in for an even bigger venture; he’s about to embark on the teen years with his two kids: Lucas, 11, and Addy, 9.
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10 Minutes With
Q. As you’re about to embark on the teen years with your kids, what are your biggest concerns about that stage? A. We have special circumstances with our children because they both have life-threatening food allergies. So, we’ve already been through a lot in terms of anxiety, worries and vigilance. It’s been a good prep for whatever comes our way. We’ve already had discussions about fears and how to stay safe that it’s hard to imagine any bigger concerns moving forward. They’ll become more independent in their teen years and will be in new situations involving food, travelling, parties and hockey tournaments on their own. I don’t want to get ahead of myself, but that’s the biggest concern for me. Right now they’re in such a delightful stage and still listen to us! But I’m told in a year or two that’ll change.
Q. What worries you most:
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Q. Do you have a strategy in
Q. Did your children inherit your
mind when it comes to dealing with defiant teens? A. God, no. I have not thought that one through. I’m just trying to stay in the moment and take it as it comes. When you stop and think about it, any issues are going to revolve around channels of communication so it’s important to stay as open as you possibly can. They have to know that they can feel free to share. Because if they’re not talking, you have no way of knowing what is going on.
sense of business? Do you think they’ll work for dad one day? A. It’s funny. Their mom is the antithesis of business. She is more of an artist. She’s good at being in the moment. She doesn’t have a business mind but she has a strong intuition. It’s too early to say, but I see a real mix of the two of us in our children. I won’t push business on them or hold it up as something they should aspire to. They need time to figure out who they are before we encourage one thing or another. ■
Q. How have your kids surprised you most as they have grown older? A. I have been surprised by how quickly their sense of humour has become sophisticated. It’s more of an adult perception where they’re making mature observations. I think, ‘OMG where did that come from?’
CONNECT WITH US Have some words of advice for Bruce? Email your tips: info@inbetween.ca
Images Courtesy of CBC
having a teen boy or teen girl? A. Definitely a girl. Only because I can already tell it’s going to be easier with my son. We’re on the same wavelength. It takes me longer to figure out what is troubling my little girl or what’s on her mind. That’s just the way it is.
Bruce on Dragons’ Den
inFORM
What you need to know for your today and their tomorrow ▲▼ ▲▼ ▲▼ ▲▼ ▲▼ ▲▼ ▲▼ ▲▼ ▲▼ ▲▼ ▲▼ ▲▼ ▲▼ ▲▼ ▲▼ ▲▼ ▲▼ ▲▼▲▼ ▲▼ ▲▼ ▲▼ ▲▼ ▲▼▲▼ ▲▼▲▼▲
PERKS OF PUMPKIN
Need a reason to indulge in a piece of pie this Thanksgiving? Pumpkin is packed with heart-healthy fibre and vitamin A. Moreover, the spices that make pumpkin pie so delicious – nutmeg and cinnamon – can help lower your cholesterol and maintain insulin levels in the blood when mixed with a fruit or veggie. So there you go. You can have your pie and eat it too. inbetween
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28.2 per 1,000
News Briefs
of girls aged 8-18 said they currently believed they had breast cancer. The survey, conducted by Breastcancer.org, asked 2,500 girls about the disease that will kill approximately 76,600 women in Canada in 2014. Of those surveyed, more than 20 per cent believed that breast cancer is caused by infection, tanning, drug use, stress, and breast injury or bruising – none of which are actual risk factors. Moreover, few girls surveyed knew how to reduce their risk of developing breast cancer in their lifetime. The takeaway for parents: This October, for Breast Cancer Awareness Month, have a talk with your teen girls about the realities of breast cancer.
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The national rate of teen pregnancies, up slightly from 27.9. The four provinces which have seen the biggest increase in teen pregnancies between 2006 and 2010 for women aged 15 to 19 jumped by nearly 40 per cent in New Brunswick, nearly 36 per cent in Newfoundland, more than 17 per cent in Nova Scotia and 15 per cent in Manitoba. Source: The Sex Information and Education Council of Canada
CanuCk teens are biggest pot smokers
According to a 2013 study conducted by Unicef, teenagers in Canada use cannabis more than any other developed country. The figure comes from a World Health Organization (WHO) study conducted in 2009, which surveyed teenagers across 29 developed nations, including more than 15,000 in Canada. The report shows that 28 per cent of 15-year-olds admitted to having used cannabis in the past year.
TEENS & TINDER
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TINDER
Teens & Tinder
What to do if your child is on the app renowned for easy hookups. by peter carter My friend and neighbour Steve is in his mid-40s and by any definition, Steve’s a catch. Divorced for two years, Steve has a great smile and lots of dark hair with just a whisper of grey. He’s fit but not self-absorbed; he works with an interior design firm and speaks fluent Spanish. Steve’s a good dad, too. I see him with his 11and 13-year-old daughters because they still live in the area. In fact, he and his ex co-parent as cozily as possible. Steve started dating recently, and when I asked where he meets women, he said, “Tinder.” Tinder is a dating app. And it’s huge. After I asked a few more questions, it seemed like I am one of the few remaining people in North America who hadn’t heard about it. Turns out even my 23-year-old daughter has toyed with Tinder, she tells me. But then I asked Steve: “How would you feel if you came home and found Marcie [the older daughter] on Tinder?” Steve: “Are you kidding? I’d hit the roof!” The truth about Tinder Steve’s reaction is met with good measure. Why? Tinder focuses on the user’s appearance, geographic location and eagerness to get it on. You input your info, your best selfie and voila! you’re looking at hundreds if not thousands inbetween
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of photos and quickie descriptions of like-minded people who just might want to hook up with you. It all sounds so easy and fun; fun that is, except for a few things that parents of teens might find downright chilling. The people who started the app will tell you it’s aimed at adults but we all know better — teens are going to explore Tinder. How to control the uncontrollable You can try to dictate their online behaviour, but experts and moms agree that these days, with the exception of taking away their phones, that’s extremely difficult. (For some ideas, see sidebar: “Helping Kids Safely Navigate the Online World.”) So while you can’t protect your teen 24/7, you must make sure they grow up knowing that they
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can come and talk to you about anything. Karen Skinulis, of Richmond Hill, Ont., a mother of two grown daughters, 26 and 22, is a parenting pro who for the past 25 years has led parenting classes for groups and institutions. She has also coauthored a few books, including Practical Parenting: A Common Sense Guide to Raising Cooperative, Self-Reliant and Loving Children. “Tinder presents a challenging social experience for teen,” Skinulis says. “This is as superficial as it gets and simply begs the stark question, ‘Do you like how I look?’” You might not be able to stop your son or daughter from sifting through matches on Tinder, but Skinulis says the important thing is that you’re there for them if they’ve been hurt or scared and want to come up for air.
Teens & Tinder “Imagine you are in their shoes and feeling it yourself,” says Skinulis. “Let your teen know you have confidence they will be able to handle this event, even though it’s difficult.” And lose the lecturing. Once you start haranguing them about the behaviour, she says, they stop hearing what you’re saying. Brave new parenting world Bertholde Carter is a veteran counselor with Bassis & Carter Counselling in Sudbury, Ont., and she, too, acknowledges that Internet-age parents simply have to deal with this new undeveloped form of supervision and guidance. “I don’t know of many stories of childhood where one was not hurt,” she says. “But if someone gets hurt they should feel they could turn to their parents without being criticized.” Carter and Skinulis agree: Be there for your child when they feel vulnerable. You don’t have to know what to say; nobody does. Just be there. It also wouldn’t hurt to check out the app yourself, so you can educate yourself about Tinder and have some idea of what your kids may be doing on the app. And when you do, remember this: Talking breeds communication. Even though you might not know exactly what to say, say something. And encourage them to talk. “The more a child talks to a parent,” says Carter, “the more likely the right words will come to the parent.” ■
Helping Kids Safely Navigate the
Online World WHether it’s a website or mobile app, here’s how to keep your teen safe. By jan Sippel know what they’re doing Monitor your child’s online activities and have ongoing conversations about their online experiences throughout adolescence. Discuss whom your child can talk to online and what it’s OK to talk about. Caution your teen that flirting with strangers online can put them at risk and may lead to inappropriate conversations and requests. Advise your teen to never post or send intimate or sexual pictures. protect their privacy Emphasize that everything they post online is public and permanent. Even when a conversation or post has been deleted, it may have already been archived or copied by another user. Teach your child to protect their online privacy by not sharing personal information, especially their full name, address, phone number or birthdate. Help your child to set privacy settings on social networking sites. be an askable, tellable adult Be positive about the online world. It is central to the lives of today’s children and youth. Use your guidance and wisdom as a parent to help your child navigate what they are seeing, doing and experiencing online. Teach them about your family’s values and your expectations of them both offline and online. Talk about healthy relationships — what do they look like, sound like, feel like? Let your child know that if anything happens online that is inappropriate or makes them feel uncomfortable, they can talk to you and won’t get in trouble. Keep the lines of communication open. ■ inbetween
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ASK THE EXPERT with Kimberly Moffit
Q. My 16-year-old son borrowed my laptop the other
day. He must have closed it in a hurry because when I went to use it, a flurry of porn sites popped up. Does this mean he is having sex?!? I don’t want to embarrass him but, at the same time, I don’t want him thinking Internet porn reflects a healthy sexual relationship. How do I approach this topic? Or do I?
A. Oh boy! The topic of sex
Kimberly Moffit is one of Canada’s most experienced relationship experts and provides practical advice for families, parenting and psychological topics. She’s a regular speaker for Queen’s University’s MBA and Women in Leadership Programs, and a frequent lecturer at the University of Waterloo. Kimberly also makes regular TV appearances on shows including CTV’s Canada AM, CBC’s The National, City TV News and Global TV’s Morning Show to name a few.
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is one that many parents do their best to avoid. It can be embarrassing, awkward, and even frightening to even think about discussing sex with your teenager. Pornography is an item of interest for many young boys (and yes, girls too), especially during adolescence. Teens are typically curious about sex in general, but also have questions about how things work and how what they learned in Sex-Ed class applies to real life people. While those in earlier generations only needed to worry about their kids finding a Playboy magazine, today’s
dangers are more real. Pornography today is easier to access and parents need to be extra protective over their children. Exposure to pornography at too young an age, before young adults have had real, supportive, and healthy sexual relationships can create unhealthy expectations, unrealistic views on sex, and an addiction to pornography. But just because you found pornography on your computer, doesn’t mean your son is sexually active, or even thinking about sex. There are two options you can think about: First, consider putting blockers on
Ask the Expert
the computers in your house and limiting your son’s exposure to Internet while he’s on his own (i.e. keep your family computer in the kitchen area where it can be easily seen). This will prevent him from accessing adult content that could
CONNECT WITH US Have a question for kimberly? info@inbetween.ca
be damaging. Discussing the issue with him is a call that’s up to you. Many teens would understand the ‘fantasy’ aspect of pornography, and similar to video games, they wouldn’t expect the same exact events to occur in real life. Some teenagers would. So think about your child and their unique view of the world, and if you’re still worried, have an honest and frank conversation. “I noticed the other day after you used my computer that some adult content kept popping up. I know you’re
probably curious about things, but adult content is labelled “adult” for a reason—it’s not real. It can also be dangerous for teens because it sets unrealistic expectations. I don’t want you watching anything adult on my computer, on the home computer, or at all, period. I care about you and I want you to grow up in a healthy environment.” Yes, they might be embarrassed, but showing your teen that you care and want to protect them is the most supportive thing you can do. ■ inbetween
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natural flu Fight
DID YOU KNOW...
Although fish oils can help fight off the flu, they can contain mercury and other heavy metals, so make sure to choose brands with high quality, third-party tested products like Barlean’s, Nordic Naturals, and Carlson Laboratories. All of their products are tested for purity.
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Cold & Flu
Ways to keep your sickness at bay by andrea donsky
‘Tis the season for colds and flus. They’re seeping into schools, lingering in our office cubicles and hiding out on the handles of grocery carts and door knobs. The sneaky sick germs are constantly waiting to cling on to any aspect of you in hopes you’ll bring them home and spread them around to the whole family. They’re a tenacious breed, most definitely. The good news: You can defeat them with some simple natural remedies.
Andrea Donsky is an author, registered holistic nutritionist (R.H.N.), international speaker, and co- founder of The Healthy Shopper Coupon Book and NaturallySavvy.com. Andrea is proud to be the kind of mom who feeds her kids fish oil, flaxseed and seaweed.
NEED PIC
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Oscillococcinum This is an over-the-counter homeopathic remedy that works wonders for symptoms of the flu. Clinical studies in a British scientific journal show that out of the patients who took Oscillococcinum within 24 hours of the onset of symptoms, nearly 63 per cent showed “clear improvement” or “complete resolution” within 48 hours. It’s at the top of my list when anyone in my family gets sick. It’s also safe for kids, and, in fact, I recently just gave it to my child when she had a fever, and she bounced back pretty quickly.
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Cold & Flu
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TEA
Drinking tea and breathing in its steam can help relieve nasal congestion. The soothing remedy also stimulates the cilia— the hair follicles in the nose—to move out germs more efficiently. Try adding in some cold-fighting lemon or honey. While the former helps to thin mucus, the latter has antibacterial properties. As a huge tea lover and drinker, I love Bigelow’s Sweet Dreams tea. It’s great for anxiety and for those nights where you’re having trouble sleeping due to being under the weather. It’s good for both adults and kids.
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Probiotics
Essential for anything digestion-related, probiotics help to normalize digestion, support our immune system and relieve allergies. They are the ‘good’ bacteria that help to keep us healthy. Bio-K+ has a lot of research behind it so that’s one reason I really love this brand in particular.
Oregano Oil
North American Herb and Spice’s oregano oil is a must-have for everyone’s medicine cabinet. It can be used both internally for colds or stomach flus, and externally if diluted in olive oil on cold sores, skin infections, eczema, etc. It’s antibacterial and antiviral so it’s great to keep on hand. I have been using it on my kids since they were babies by adding a couple of drops and running it on the bottom of their feet whenever they get colds.
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Apps
APPS THAT TRACK Want to know what your teen is up to? Who they’re actually texting and if they really are at the movies? There’s an app for that. by brittany dempster
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Apps
Smartphones can be double-edged swords. Yes, they allow us to stay in touch 24/7 but for some teens, they can also be a gateway to inappropriate activity. The good news is while smartphones are evolving with each new upgrade and version, so are the apps that help us keep tabs on our teens and give us some much needed peace-of-mind parenting. Here are a few worth the download.
TEEN SAFE FOR IPHONE
Life 360 for Android & iOS
If you’re always wondering where your teen is, this app tracks your child’s location. It also allows users to create customizable circles made of family members, friends or colleagues, and then share their location to other circle members, viewable on a map. Also included in this app: In-app messaging, a check-in notification system, and even a panic button that immediately sends a phone call, email and text message with your GPS location.
More than 350,000 parents have downloaded TeenSafe, which allows you to see into your teen’s digital world by offering discrete and convenient access to all their mobile phone activities, including their current location, text messages, deleted text messages, web browsing history, Facebook, WhatsApp, Instagram and Kik activity. According to its news release, “The app also allows you “to more easily detect issues such as truancy, drug abuse or bullying.” Rawdon Messenger, CEO of TeenSafe says in the release that the company wants parents to know about such potential issues early on: “We all worry about what our children are facing through social media and mobile devices.”
IGNORE NO MORE
MY MOBILE WATCHDOG for Android & iphone
You can view your teen’s phone call logs and read their text messages using this app. My Mobile Watchdog also allows you to find out where your child is through the device’s GPS. Worried your teen might be using his smartphone too much? With this app, parents can also set web and time use blocking, as well as remotely block and grant access to apps.
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for iphone & IOS
D
Ever get the feeling that your teen is screening her calls? Well, now she can Ignore No More with this app that helps re-establish an open line of communication with your teen. If your teen ignores calls and text messages from you, you can simply “lock their phones until they call you back.” And when the app is enabled, teens cannot call friends, send text messages or play games until they communicate with you.
Texting & Driving
messageNOT Delivered A new study suggests teens are texting and driving more than ever. Experts weigh-in on why they do it and what you can do to stop it. by erin hesselink inbetween
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“according to dimerman, the most important thing parents can do is model good behaviour themselves.”
D
ustin Vernie was driving home from a friend’s place in Lockport, Man., when he reached for his BlackBerry to send a text. Distracted with tapping out his message, the 17-year-old didn’t notice his small Honda Civic had drifted into oncoming traffic. Within seconds, Vernie was hit head-on by an SUV and had to be rescued from his totalled car with the Jaws of Life. The crash left Vernie shattered. It broke his left foot, left leg, left arm, right femur and neck. Most of his ribs were either broken or cracked. His lung collapsed on impact. To put him back together, metal rods were put into his femur, pins were inserted into his wrist and his neck is now fused together from the top of his skull down to the sixth vertebrae. Today, he can’t turn his head at all. Since the accident, his life has been a flurry of surgeries—he’s up to 13—most of which are a blur. “I can’t even remember what they all were,” says Vernie, now 20. Sadly, distracted driving accidents due to texting and driving are on the rise, according
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to a recent survey done by the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health in Toronto. The study cites that more than one third of licensed Ontario students from Grades 10 to 12 admitted to texting while driving at least once in the past year. An alarming 46 per cent of Grade 12 students said they have sent a text while driving at least once. This is especially troubling as a study done by CAA says that drivers sending a text are 23 times more likely to crash, or have a near-crash experience. The Ontario Provincial Police said earlier this year that texting and driving is becoming the No. 1 killer on the roads. So why are teens choosing to take this risk? Nat Roman, a Toronto-based couple and family therapist, says that “strong social needs of adolescents play a role in the desire to keep in contact, even when engaged in behaviours like driving.” Roman also says that teens, especially younger teens, have yet to develop certain cognitive aspects that allow for risk assessment. “Therefore, teens tend to engage in riskier behaviour than adults who may
be better equipped to evaluate potential consequences.” What you can do Teaching your teen about the dangers of texting and driving is difficult, especially when the behaviour is something that happens when the teen is alone. “The best hope is to appeal to their heart and conscience,” says Roman. “Have a genuine conversation about your fears, how much you love them and want them to be safe, and the fear that they could accidentally injure or kill someone else.” Try raising the topic during a casual conversation, springboarding from an article you’ve read in the newspaper or something you saw on the news, suggests Sara Dimerman, a psychologist based in Thornhill, Ont., author and creator of helpmesara.com. According to Dimerman, the most important thing parents can do is model good behaviour themselves. “If a parent is driving in the car with his or her teen as a passenger and they hear an alert that a text has arrived on the parent’s phone, it’s very important for the parent to say
Texting & Driving
something like, ‘I’m not going to look at that text right now. It can wait. I am concentrating on the road and making safety a priority.’ “And, when you do see something in the world around you that you might not have noticed if your head had been looking down at a device, make mention of it,” says Dimerman. “‘Wow. Am I glad that I was looking up when that old high school friend passed by me. I would never have seen and renewed contact with her otherwise.’ Your teen will never know you rehearsed it in your head first!” If the message isn’t getting through to your teen, make it clear that access to the car and cellphone are privileges that can be taken away if they are being misused.
Spreading the word After years of recovery time, Vernie is working to turn his tragedy into a positive lesson for others. He travelled to schools in Manitoba and spoke to students about texting and driving, hoping to inspire other teens to avoid it at all costs. “I wanted everyone who continued to text and drive to experience how hard life was for me and my family after the accident. It makes me very angry at how selfish people are by texting and driving. It’s simply not worth it. Not only are you putting your own life in danger but you’re endangering the lives of other drivers on the road as well.” Feedback from the students was mixed, says Vernie. “Some girls and teachers were in tears while the guys were pretty
straight-faced and emotionless. I remember at a school I spoke to in Brandon, everyone was so attentive, and as I finished and was leaving the parking lot, what did I see? Yup, a kid texting and driving.” One can only hope he got the message of the dangers of texting and driving before it was too late. ■
HITTING HOME
Feel like the words aren’t sinking in? show your teen this video, which includes comments from Vernie, the woman who saved him and real news footage from the accident. It could make all the difference. Go to Youtube.com and search “Vernie Texting.”
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TRICKS ARE FOR KIDS
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S IDS
Dangerous Extracurricular Trends
The latest dangerous teen trends, why they do them and warning signs to watch for. by megan funnell
eens have always been rebellious: pushing boundaries and testing the limits. Think back to when you were a teen and you probably got up to your own share of hijinks. And while, at times, some troublesome fun may be an exercise in learning life lessons, teens these days are stepping it up at a very valuable cost—their lives. Sizzurp, Cinnamon and... Condom Snorting? Teen pranks have turned deadly with stunts that include: getting drunk off Sizzurp, a cocktail where you mix cough medicine with a pop beverage to get high; Vodka Eyeballing, where you pour alcohol directly into your eye, which is quickly absorbed through the eye’s blood vessels; Inhaling Alcohol, where you heat alcohol in a container and inhale the vapours; The Cinnamon Challenge, where you swallow a spoonful of cinnamon in less than a minute (without water); and Condom Snorting, where you insert a condom into your nostril, snort it back into your throat and retrieve it out of your mouth.
Why teens test the limits Teens are at a stage in their lives where they’re pushing for independence, says Gary Direnfeld, a Dundas, Ont.based social worker with Interactive Consultants. He says inbetween
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Dangerous Trends
this poses a challenge for parents who are pushing to be involved in their teen’s lives. Why? It may cause tension. “If you already have a poor relationship with your teen—one that is filled with conflict—that will become a greater risk factor for your teen experimenting in highrisk behaviour,” he says. Moreover, although pouring alcohol into your eyes may seem like the most idiotic thing you’ve ever heard of, your teen might, well, see it differently. “From a teen’s perspective, they think they’re doing something smart—without directly ingesting alcohol, they feel that they won’t be subject to a hangover. But because they get high so quickly, their judgment is going to be that much more impaired,” says Direnfeld. “Teens don’t drink to enjoy. They drink to get hammered. But as they’re indulging in these particular drinking trends, they’re at a greater risk for underestimating
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Warning Signs
What You Can Do
If you feel that your teen is being negatively influenced by friends and is engaging in bad behaviours, Direnfeld encourages you to look for these tell-tale signs: ❑ A change in their peer group —where you previously knew their friends but now aren’t sure who they’re hanging out with. ❑ An air of secrecy—around where they’re going, what they’re going to do, and when they’re coming back home. ❑ A change in one’s school performance—grades are slipping, teen is secretive or withholding information about marks, performance, etc. ❑ If the teen breaks curfew and returns home later and later each time and/or tries to avoid you once they return home at night.
Believe it or not, your teen sees you as a more powerful influence than their friends, says Direnfeld, who adds that if you have a positive, healthy relationship with your teen then you have the power to steer them on the right path—away from bad behaviours and dangerous trends. “So, if your son or daughter does come home late at night, and avoids you upon their return, it’s reasonable to go into their room and say, “How are you doing? We missed you!” So, while you appear friendly and engaged, you can discreetly assess their behaviour.” And if you do suspect your teen of engaging in bad behaviours or indulging in dangerous trends, it’s essential that you approach your teen and the situation at hand from a position of support and concern, rather than anger. “Parents need to come to terms with the fact that we can’t control our youth—we can only influence them. However, we can control ourselves. We may not want to say, ‘Here’s the punishment or the consequences to your behaviour’ and instead say, ‘Here’s what we need to do for all of us to feel comfortable and safe in our own home.’” ■
how much alcohol is entering their system – leading to potential cases of poor judgment, unwanted/ unprotected sexual behaviour, unintentional injuries and/ or death.”
inSPIRE living your best life
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MODERN FAMILY SPECIAL Families are like snowflakes—no two are alike. We want to celebrate these differences with a snapshot of three families, all unique in nature yet all united by one shared interest: Raising teens and YAs circa 2014. Here’s how they do it. FAMILY #1
THE
LASAGNA FAMILY Cathy, 58, Phil, 56, Frankie, 29, Jessica, 28, Rebecca, 22.
photography by jessica blaine smith
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Modern Family
Cathy and Phil have been married for 30 years. Cathy was born and raised in Toronto and that is where she and Phil made their home. Frankie and Jessica each live on their own while Rebecca, a recent university graduate, is now back living at home. With her kids grown, we sat down with Cathy to chat about parenting young adults. LOOKING BACK ON THOSE EARLY YEARS I always wanted to have a large family. I had the first two close together then we waited a little while before getting pregnant again. I lost one early on and than I got pregnant with Rebecca six years later. I found raising a family basically to be a breeze. I don’t want to sound cocky, but I just found it got easier and easier with each kid. Initially, you’re so protective with the first one—every little sniffle and you’re at Sick Kids hospital! ON HOW DIFFERENT EACH CHILD IS Frankie was never a good sleeper — he still isn’t! Jessica was an easy baby. With Rebecca, I had the older kids and she had to fit into our schedule; maybe that’s why she has
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Cathy and her daughters
such an easy-going personality. She was then and she is now.” I love having older children! We all have a good relationship. My son owns his own restaurant [Terrazza on Harbord St. in Toronto] and he’s very close with me. He has always confided in me more than my girls do. Jess was more of a challenge but in the last five years — since she moved out — we are on much better terms. Rebecca was always close to us and never rebelled. She learned from observing what went on with the others! On her heart-stopping moment I guess I was a bit stereotypical
about my son. I didn’t worry about his safety as much as the girls because he’s a boy. But then he got mugged on New Year’s Eve as he was coming back home. He was walking through a park and he got mugged by kids. They took his jacket and shoes and he had to walk home in the dark winter night. He came in and told us. After that, I worried a lot more about his safety. On her heart-warming moments It’s just so wonderful to see them develop into adults that have the same values that we do. We’ve always been into family get-togethers and we have a large
“As they grow and get independent, it can be hard to let go. But you have to let them do things for themselves as soon as they can.” family and a large circle of friends. They were all part of shaping who my kids are. On helping kids grow into adults You really need to help your kids learn to make decisions on their own—even if they make the wrong decision. When my kids reached age 10, I decided this was the right age for them to do laundry — this was something they should be able to do. At university, Rebecca had a room across from the laundry facilities and another student asked
her to show her how to do laundry. This was a month into school so Rebecca asked what this girl had been doing for four weeks — turns out, she’d been buying new clothes! My sister told me once that a lot of issues come up between parents and children because of control issues. You have this tiny baby and you think, I have to provide and do everything for them. As they grow and get independent, it can be hard to let go. But you have to let them do things for themselves as soon as they can.
On the right messages You have to let them know you trust them, but you have to engage in a dialogue about their safety because ultimately, that’s all that matters. If you don’t like their friends, don’t make it an issue—it will backfire. I always told them, if you’re ever out and anything happens, you call. I can’t guarantee that I’ll be happy, but I will come get you. On Embracing the moment My husband and I are enjoying this phase! We can sit back and say, ‘We did OK!’ ■
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FAMILY #2
THE LU/WU
FAMILY Lisa Lu, 52, and Lin Wu, 22.
photography by jessica blaine smith
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Modern Family
Lisa and Lin have been a mom/daughter duo since Lisa divorced Lin’s father in 2000. Here she shares the secrets to surviving the teen years as a single mom. On staying close We have a close relationship. We do a lot of things together like grocery shopping and cooking. I drive her around, which is a good opportunity for us to communicate. That has always been the trick to talking to her: Driving. It keeps her in the seat beside me and she has nowhere to go! At home, she’s always doing something. She says “Oh, I’m talking to someone, I don’t have time to talk to you.” Whereas in the car, she can’t go anywhere. That’s the time we communicate or we like to go out for a meal.
On supporting one another When she was in high school, I went through a period of depression. It was a hard time. She worked part time at a restaurant and she would bring me food because I didn’t want to cook. She helped me out so much. I never thought I would ever experience depression. I always try to keep myself healthy because I am mostly on my own with Lin (her father lives in China). So she would come home and we’d eat the food she brought home together and she’d
help me do laundry. Being from China, I wanted to learn more about Canadian culture. Kids are raised differently here than they are in China. I tried to support the things she wanted to do, like play rugby. I didn’t really understand it or want her to play but supported her decision to play in the end. Advice for other parents on getting through the teen years Learn about your kids. Let them build their own identity and character. Try to be positive. ■
“Learn about your kids. Let them build their own identity and character. “
On surviving the ups and downs We have had our share of fights. When she was in high school, they were usually about her playing her computer games late into the night. She would be so tired, she would fall asleep in class! I would say to her, “Don’t play.” She would say, “I can’t believe you.” I didn’t know what to do. I just told her to stop and hoped she listened! One time she wanted to go clubbing and I didn’t want her to go. That’s when I wanted her home playing computer games! inbetween
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FAMILY #3
THE SHILLOLO/Van Hoekelen
FAMILY Angela, 39, Dennis, 42, Zac, 15, Ella, 13, Katerra, 8
photography by jessica blaine smith
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Modern Family Angela Shillolo and her boyfriend, Dennis, have been together for almost seven years and are living in Toronto. Zac, 15, and Ella, 13, are Angela’s kids and Katerra, 8, is Dennis’s daughter. Dennis works as a bike messenger and Angela is an assistant to the owner of a new (not even open) bike shop. INBETWEEN sat down with Angela to chat about making it work and blending the two families. ON THE DECISION TO LIVE TOGETHER Deciding to live together was easy; it was way easier to coordinate our lives than to justify the cost of living separately in this city! Figuring out each other’s schedules was a little more challenging, and still is, really. We had to learn that no one would truly suffer if dinner wasn’t always at 6:30 on the dot. We adapted and accepted that we would always have to adapt. ON BRINGING THE FAMILIES TOGETHER The first time it became obvious was when he took my kids out to get me flowers for my birthday - all of a sudden, Dennis was my boyfriend. Katerra was also so young and fun to be around that it was like getting a new toy/puppy — everyone wanted to play with her. Ella was certainly more apprehensive that
someone was coming in to take her momma; she was the original baby of the family after all. We don’t go to great lengths to make everyday life a whole “family experience” but I always find it amazing and wonderful that when we do things altogether (big family reunions, weddings, even the photo shoot for this article), we work really well together and have a great time doing it! The biggest difficulty is the age gap between my two and Katerra — that isn’t going to change. As I graduate from one phase of parenting, Dennis is just entering it. Right now, he swears Katerra will never sleep until noon. Dennis established relationships with my kids but we came from a fairly controlling and overwhelming situation with their dad. To this day, my ex doesn’t acknowledge him – sad but true. Dennis was very patient and didn’t try to be their dad, but treats us all respectfully. The great thing is that we pretty much just get along and have fun being ourselves. We all accept each other for who we are, we’re nice to each other and respect that we are all different. ON PARENTING TEENS IN A BLENDED FAMILY Do what works for you. In a blended family, where there are many sets of involved and loving parents with different rules, expectations and
beliefs, parents need to keep in mind that “fair isn’t always equal.” The expectations for someone who lives in our house every day vs. every other week vs. every other weekend are different. Personally, I took issue to being a step-parent — they are always “evil.” We started referring to each other as “bonus parents” and “bonus kids.” It’s easier if you look at it like you’re getting something extra that a “normal” family doesn’t have. Everybody loves a bonus! ON CONFLICTS Anything that would really count as a conflict is usually resolved with impromptu family meetings (even though we have never really called it that). There is often a short meeting on the stairs where we talk about how the other person would feel, or sometimes we use stories like, “Remember when you were that age, you did that?” We also talk so that everyone has their chance to chime in about things like, “What’s the most important rule at mom’s or dad’s place?” We do our best not to sound too full of ourselves. We hardly ever have conflicts and we are pretty comfortable doing our own thing and pitching in. We learn by making mistakes and we complement each other in our differences. ■ inbetween
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Photos by Drexina Nelson AND candiD SHOTS COURTESY OF NENE LEAKES
NeNe Leakes
The EVOLUTION of
NENE
Entertainment powerhouse, proud mother and budding fashion designer, NeNe Leakes shares her personal journey of inner growth and professional success. by amanpreet dhami
“
W
hen you step into a public figure role, there are a lot of things that you can and cannot do, and I had to learn that,” says actress NeNe Leakes, reflecting on her sevenyear stint on Bravo’s Real Housewives of Atlanta. “And, unfortunately, sometimes I had to learn that on television and in the public eye. It’s tough to grow like that on TV because people are constantly judging you, so it’s really hard to grow and evolve and sometimes you just want to lash out. But I have evolved.” Indeed she has. Besides her enduring popularity on Real Housewives, Leakes, 46, has appeared on Celebrity Apprentice, The Fashion Police, Dancing
with the Stars and showed her acting chops in roles on The New Normal and Glee. But the most important roles of her life are wife to long-time husband, Gregg Leakes, and mother to her sons, Bryson 24, and Brentt, 15. Family first “If I didn’t have my family and my children I would not be NeNe at all,” Leakes says. “My husband and my two boys are like the world to me. My family just means everything to me. That’s all I can tell you, without them there is no me.” But family life wasn’t always easy. Leakes had her first son, Bryson, in her early 20s, single and still in inbetween
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NeNe Leakes
“Just like you put anything else on the schedule, you put your husband and your family on the schedule.”
Growing on reality TV Besides raising sons with a considerable age gap, Leakes has also had to learn about life in the public eye. But surprisingly, she feels that her time on Real
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Left: NeNe with her son, Brentt Right: NeNe with her husband, Gregg
Housewives of Atlanta has helped her grow and mature. “When you are doing something like this show, you evolve,” she says. “I cannot tell you how much I have evolved and how much I have grown as a woman. This whole experience has changed who I am as a woman, as a mother, as a wife, as a girlfriend. I am just proud of myself for who I have become.” That growth has included new projects and passions. In July, for example, Leakes launched the NeNe Leakes Collection on the Home Shopping Network. It’s a
clothing line that provides “amazing sexy, comfy and affordable luxury” to women from size two to 24. “I love making women feel good,” says Leakes. “One of the big issues I faced were a lot of full-figured women came to me saying, ‘We want to look good too. Where do you buy your clothes?’ So I decided I wanted this line to cover curvy girls.” Leakes is also pursing her dream of performing on stage. This November, she stars as the first African-American evil stepmother in the Broadway musical Cinderella. The role, she
Photos by Drexina Nelson AND candiD SHOTS COURTESY OF NENE LEAKeS
college. “Bryson is the reason why I work so hard,” she says. “When he was young I would do whatever I had to do to provide for him. The moment they put that baby in my arms and I looked in his eyes I was like, ‘I have to give him a good life. I have to give him everything.’” That same feeling of maternal love happened again, 10 years later, with the birth of Brentt. “Having two kids that are that far apart in age is good and bad,” says Leakes. “One thing that is bad is that they both grew up as if they were the only child. When Bryson was 18, Brentt was nine. He and his little brother never got to share things. They didn’t get to play together. They won’t have memories saying, ‘We were brothers playing together.’” On the other hand, Leakes points out: “My eldest son could always help me out a lot when Brentt was a baby.”
says, “will definitely be a challenge for me, because it’s going to be two shows a day and Broadway is very tough. I’ll be working during the holidays —Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, New Year’s Day and New Year’s Eve — just non-stop for three months. It’s totally different than television.” Keep it all in balance With all of her exciting new endeavours on-the-go, Leakes is a busy woman. How does she manage her jam-packed life? “It’s very difficult to do,” she states. “It’s very hard to do and I still find it a challenge. One thing my family and I do: My husband travels with me and my child travels with me often when I am on the road.” And when she’s not on the road, Leakes makes family her top priority. “Just like you put anything else on the schedule, you put your husband and your family on the schedule,” she says. “If you don’t, you can go crazy because your significant other, he is going to constantly say he doesn’t get to have time with you. And with your children, well you have to play mom. I just have to hug my boy Brentt.” She also carves out one-on-one time with her teen, even if it’s just to visit their local Chipotle. “It’s nothing fancy,” she says. “He ordered a burrito and I ordered myself a quick salad and we talked. It works! Even if it’s just a few minutes we have to have that quick little quality time together.” It’s such moments that remind Leakes of how much her life has grown and changed very much for the better — something she hopes young women will take encouragement from. “You know, a few years ago I wouldn’t be able to say I am an inspiration,” she says, “but today I feel like I am an inspiration to other women. I feel like other women look up to me — like I am a voice to other women. And I had to grow into that. There’s one of those old sayings, ‘When you know better you do better.’ I feel like I know better now, so I have done a whole lot better.” ■ inbetween
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KICKIN’ FALL
With fall already in full gear, it is time to break out the boots and strut your stuff in style. by jordana handler
BOOTS
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Fall Boots
FOR
MOM
This fall, fashion is all about being bright and bold, so opt for a neutral boot that can go with any look. • If you opt for an ankle boot or bootie, look for a little height with a great heel or an interesting tonal pattern or detail. • For a tall boot, make sure that it hits you right above or just below the knee to maximize on and elongate your legs. If you have calves that are difficult to fit, buy a natural fabric like leather and have the legs of the boot stretched to fit!
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1. Guess Oblong Boot, $169, guess.ca. 2. Guess Tolum Boot, $295, guess.ca. 3. Toms Desert Wedge High, $119, toms.ca. 4. Gap Suede Ankle Bootie, $90, gap.ca. 5. Joe Fresh Leather High-Heel Boot $119, joefresh.com.
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FOR
TEEN GIRLS For the young (or young at heart), embrace the fall trend of pattern on pattern and grab a boot that shows off your fun side! • Floral prints, bohemian stripes or metallic finishes are a great way to play with your look. • If too much pattern is not for you, grab some booties with some great details like a patent finish or cool lace-up front.
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To make your boots last longer, invest in a waterproofing spray. Spray your boots, let them dry overnight and enjoy them right through the winter months.
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1. Skechers Women’s Synergy Strong Will Boot, $85, skechers. com. 2. Toms Wedges in Grey Floral, $80, toms.ca. 3. Toms Nepal Boot in Navy Guatemalan Stripe, $110, toms.ca. 4. Joe Fresh Girls Western Bootie, $24, joefresh.com 5. Dr. Martens Pascal, $175, drmartens.com.
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FOR
The BOYS When choosing a boot for dad or son, look for something tough and durable with style.
• A great ankle boot is a perfect way to keep your guys warm and comfortable all season! • Wear the ankle boot with regular pants or roll up the hem and show off the details. • Caramel and Cognac colours are the perfect complement to plaids and denim.
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Don’t be afraid to add a bit of pattern or texture to your wardrobe via your boots! They are a great way to show your style in a subtle way.
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1. Dr. Martens Capper, $190, drmartens.com. 2. Dr. Martens Arun, $205, drmartens.com. 3. Skechers Men’s Verdict, $90, skechers.com. 4. GAP Leather and Shearling Boot, $90, gap.ca.
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inDULGE
Fostering your health, body and relationship
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FACING FALL The changing of the season can have a harsh effect on our complexions. Here’s how to keep skin supple year-round. by lara hyde inbetween
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“If you have a history of dry skin or eczema, using a moisturizing cream year-round is fine, too,” he adds. Moisturizers that contain ingredients such as dimethicone, glycerin, urea and ceramides are ideal for combatting dry, itchy skin.
all is easily the most beautiful season. From the gorgeous colours and refreshing crisp air to Pick-Your-Own apple farms and haunted hayrides, fall has it all. But let’s face it (pun very much intended), as we make the transition from summer to winter, the changes in temperature and humidity levels can have an effect on our skin that isn’t always pretty.
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“As we move into fall, the drier air makes us more prone to skin dryness, dullness, and itchy skin or eczema,” says Dr. Benjamin Barankin, a Toronto dermatologist and medical director of the Toronto Dermatology Centre (www.torontodermatology centre.com). Moisture Mantra The solution to combatting fall’s dryness lies in using the right moisturizer. While a light moisturizing lotion is ideal for summer skin, “You will want to switch over to using a cream in the fall and winter,” says Dr. Barankin.
For Acne-prone Skin When it comes to keeping our skin clear, some people worry about heavy moisturizers clogging pores and causing breakouts. But the fact of the matter is that using harsh products that dry one’s skin out excessively can actually make acne worse. According to the Acne Resource Centre (www.acne-resource.org), fall/ winter is the worst time for acne outbreaks in people with dry skin. A daily routine of adding moisture will help offset this problem. People with acne-prone skin should look for moisturizers that are hypoallergenic and noncomedogenic, meaning they won’t clog pores. Many people steer clear of oil in their moisturizer’s ingredients, believing that putting oil on your skin is a one-way ticket to Zit City. But there are oils that are non-comedogenic and don’t tend to clog pores, including Argan oil and hemp seed oil, which can be applied directly to the face in
Fall Skin
their pure form and have many cosmetic benefits. Glycerin, while not typically used as a stand-alone moisturizer, is also non-comedogenic. Drop the soap As far as keeping one’s skin clean, “Soap is fine to use in the summer,” says Dr. Barankin, “but in the fall and winter, we recommend using a cleanser for the face, and, less importantly, for the body.” For families prone to dry skin and eczema, Dr. Barankin suggests considering investing in a water-softening system for the home. He also recommends using a humidifier from October to April to add moisture to the air inside your house and make your skin happier. Protect your skin Finally, while sun protection is not as critical as in the summer when the sun is more intense and sunburns are more common, sun protection is still important. Using a daily moisturizer that contains sunscreen is a simple way to ensure your skin is protected year-round. ■
Want to put your best face forward this fall?
We hand-picked our favourite products from Sephora.
Ole Henriksen Truth Revealed Vitamin C Super Crème SPF 15. This rich anti-aging cream hydrates and soothes skin while fighting the signs of aging as it firms, boosts cell proliferation and scavenges free radicals. $68 Korres Milk Proteins Foaming Cream Cleanser. This gentle cleanser is formulated with milk proteins to provide skin-enhancing lactose and essential amino acids to form a protective hydration shield on the skin. $26 Fresh Crème Ancienne Soft Cream. This light, ultra-nourishing face lotion is proven to provide 50 per cent more hydration after 24 hours of use and reduce signs of aging. $164 Sephora Collection Rose Mask for Moisturizing & Brightening. This natural fiber mask with rose extract moisturizes skin for a radiant appearance. $8
Josie Maran 100 percent Pure Argan Oil. Great for acne-prone skin, this oil, which is rich in vitamin E and essential fatty acids, is great for hydrating and nourishing skin. $60
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LovinG Leftovers
Daniel James Green is an internationally known chef, host, television personality and awardwinning author. Known as The Model Cook™, Green is a healthy eating expert and television celebrity cook in England, Thailand, Malaysia, Singapore, Hong Kong, Dubai and the USA. His latest and 10th cookbook is called The Paleo Diet: Food Your Body is Designed to Eat.
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Tired of turkey sandwiches? Celebrity chef Daniel James Green shares two nutritious and delicious recipes from his latest cookbook that’ll use up your bird and leave you wanting more. by daniel james green • photos by clare winfield very year at Thanksgiving we see countless ways to use up the turkey, including more spins on the turkey melt sandwich than I care to mention. Since we all tend to indulge on Thanksgiving and vow to eat healthier (starting the very next day!), I thought I would make it easy for you by sharing recipes from my new Paleo book. Not only are these recipes delicious but they serve up some real flavour from around the world.
Many people think the Paleo plan is hard to follow, but really it’s about eliminating processed foods from our diets. Although dairy, rice and wheat are no-gos on this nutrition plan, you can eat as much fruit, veggies and protein as you like (just avoid fatty cuts and skin on poultry). Instead of falling into the sandwich trap, I have created some recipes inspired from my world travels that will use up those turkey leftovers and disguise them in a nutritious and creative way.
Turkey Leftovers
Red Thai Turkey Curry serves 4
2 lbs of sliced cooked turkey 1 red onion sliced 1 tablespoon thai red curry paste 3-4 dried limes leaves 2 cups low-fat coconut milk 2 cups fresh spinach 2 tablespoons olive oil Handful fresh coriander, chopped Take a large non-stick pan and heat on high, adding the oil. Cook the onions for 3-5 minutes, stirring as you do. Now add the turkey to the pan. Cook for about a minute turning the ingredients. Add the curry paste and coconut milk and lower the heat to low. Then add the lime leaves and spinach. Simmer for 3-4 minutes covered. Take off the heat and serve with coriander.
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Turkey Leftovers
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Chinese wok-fried turkey with ginger and honey Serves 4 2 1/4 tablespoons olive oil 1 x 2.5cm piece of fresh ginger, peeled and grated 2 garlic cloves, finely minced 3 cups cooked skinless turkey breast, cut into strips freshly ground black pepper 4–6 baby pak choi, halved 1 tablespoon raw honey, melted 2 red peppers, deseeded and sliced 4 tablespoons chopped coriander, plus extra to garnish 2 tablespoons lime juice (or lemon juice) 4 tablespoons cashew nuts, chopped, plus extra to garnish 5 spring onions, chopped, plus extra to garnish In a large, non-stick wok, heat 1 tablespoon of the oil over a medium heat and fry the ginger and garlic until lightly golden. Take out of the pan. In the same wok, heat 1 tablespoon of the olive oil over a medium heat. Season the turkey with black pepper and stir-fry for a few minutes until warm. Return the ginger and garlic to the pan, add the remaining olive oil and cook the pak choi for about 4–5 minutes. Add all the remaining ingredients to the pan, tossing everything together and stir-frying for 3–4 minutes until the stir-fry is a little golden from the honey. Serve in a bowl with a scattering of spring onion, extra cashew nuts and a few coriander leaves to garnish.
WIN
A COPY OF DANIEL’S LATEST BOOK! Enter at www.inbetween.ca/contests to win a copy of The Paleo Diet: Food Your Body is Designed to Eat! inbetween
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5
TIPS FOR A
Thinner THANKSGIVING After Thanksgiving dinner, many of us are grateful for comfy pants. After indulging in a heaping plate — or two! — our jeans often fit snug post-meal. That’s why, to keep your waistline in check, we’ve come up with five easy tips to keep you guilt-free and on track. by susan bosley
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1.
Health Tips BE THE HOST
Sure, it means a lot of extra work, but hosting Thanksgiving dinner also puts you in charge of what goes into the food. Maybe it’s a free-range, hormonefree bird that hasn’t been soaked in salty brine or sugar, maybe the stuffing is whole grain, maybe the sides include quinoa and butter is offered on the side. If you’re hosting, you can choose healthier options from the appetizers to dessert, and steer clear of fattening dips and sides.
RELAX
Let’s face it—family time can be stressful. Unfortunately, when our body releases the stress hormone, cortisol, it can lead to weight gain. De-stress using your favourite pasttimes, whether that be a predinner walk to clear your head or a yoga class to get your Zen on.
4.
3.
TURKEY DINNER DOWNER
EAT SMART
The average American consumes more than 4,500 calories and 229 grams of fat on Thanksgiving Day alone.
Eating make us happy as we release serotonin — the happy hormone — into According to the Caloric Control our blood and that helps to Council. (Canadian stats diminish cortisol — the stress are comparable.) hormone. And, while you may think the ticket to staying thin is skipping meals earlier on in the day, your body will go into starvation mode and store your next meal as fat. Instead, when it comes to gobbling down, use the one scoop-no touching rule: Take only one serving fork of turkey, one scoop of each side dish and keep food from touching, making sure you don’t overfill your plate. Slowly enjoy every morsel, let your knife and fork rest often and realize when you are satisfied and have truly had enough.
DON’T DRINK YOUR CALORIES
Festive cocktails can easily sneak on the pounds as the juices and alcohol in them are packed with sugar. Instead, sip on some red wine, which not only tastes great with turkey, but has less sugar and is chock-full of healthy antioxidants. And don’t forget to drink water. Keep pitchers of water (add some fresh fruit slices for festive flare) on the table. You may feel fuller from drinking water to keep the calories on the table at bay.
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Health Tips
5.GET MOVING photos by erika lagyjanszki shot on location at prana fitness in toronto
Sometimes, between all the shopping, cooking and visiting relatives, a trip to the gym isn’t doable. The good news? You can burn some major calories in the privacy of your own home with this “Turkey Buster Move.” how to: Lie on your back and reach your arms overhead. In one oomph, roll over to your belly, place hands by your chest or wider and do a pushup. When up in your pushup, jack your legs out. Return to your back and, with your knees up, finish with a crunch. Repeat 20 or 30 times for the ultimate calorie burn!
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To work off those 4,500 calories the average American eats on Thanksviging Day, an average fit person, who typically burns 200 calories per 30 minutes of running, would have to run 30 minutes every day for 22 days.
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Susan Bosley is the owner and creator of Skinny Legs, a whole body, non-bulking, non-repetitive approach to fitness. www.skinnylegs.ca
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DID YOU KNOW...
Couples’ Getaway
NEW TRAVEL SERIES!
Conscious CouplinG: in this issue:
MONTREAL was 1982 when the band Chicago sang six little words that still ring true for parents everywhere: “Everybody Needs a Little Time Away.” Unfortunately, with work, kids and other obligations, a quick trip for two isn’t always doable. Until now. In this new travel series, INBETWEEN will offer up the best in couples’ getaways sure to please any twosome, from the adventurous to the romantic. Even if you only have a weekend to spare, these destinations will leave you relaxed, rejuvenated and ready to take on the world—and your teens—with renewed vigour. by graham farkas inbetween
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Couples’ Getaway
Fall is a special time of year in MontrEal.
Stay in style in the heart of Vieux-Montreal
STAY Because part of the attraction that Montreal affords is the ability to get around by walking, we’ve selected VieuxMontreal as home base, where numerous accommodations options abound. Our boutique hotel of choice, Epik Montreal, is located on rue Saint Paul Ouest, right in the heart of this historic area and offers uncompromising romantic solitude and privacy. Only a 10-minute cab ride from Gare Centrale, it features 10 luxuriously cozy suites, is set in a beautifully restored century-old building, and is perfect for those seeking a romantic weekend. 171 rue Saint Paul Ouest, 877.841.2634, www.epikmontreal.com
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photos by graham Farkas (with exception of street shot)
The bustle of summer gives way to the hunkering of winter. You’ve made the decision to get away for the weekend, and now you have 48 hours to fully engage in all that your time has to offer. To make the most of your getaway, we’ve come up with the best places to stay, dine and explore.
Montreal streets are made for strolling
Dine Dining in Montreal is one of the highlights of any visit. With so many choices, so many cultures, and such an abundance of flavours, decision-making can be daunting. In Vieux-Montreal, a short romantic walk via cobblestone streets from Epik Montreal will take you to the Buenos Airesinfluenced l’Atelier d’Argentine. As if torn out of the heart of Buenos Aires, this hybrid resto/ steakhouse is a testament to Argentina’s contemporary approach to its cuisine while being genuine and unpretentious. Led by authentically Argentinian chef Natalia Machado, L’Atelier features native cuisine backstopped by that typically gaucho’esque mainstay: Steak. The menu is easy to understand, easy to love and uses fresh
l’Atelier d’Argentine is the perfect spot for a romantic dinner for two
high quality local and imported ingredients. Accompanying the menu is an amazing Argentinianbased wine list, and a chic ambiance that will have you
thinking, “It’s Buenos Aires hour!” 355, Rue Marguerite d’Youville (514) 287-3362 www.atelierargentine.com inbetween
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Couples’ Getaway
Rue Le Royer in Vieux-Montreal
A weekend getaway is a great opportunity for conscious couplers to stimulate the senses, in lieu of warm temperatures, within the sanctuary of galleries and museums. They provide warm, intimate settings to enjoy each other’s company, and many of the best in Canada can be found via romantic walks in the crisp fall air through downtown Ville-Marie. Starting Oct. 11, 2014, until Jan. 25, 2015, lucky visitors can enjoy the superlative exhibit: Van Gogh to Kadinsky – Impressionism to Expressionism. A century after the outbreak of the First World War, this exceptional exhibition showcases more than 100
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paintings and drawings executed by the greatest avant-garde figures of all time. It sheds new light on the extraordinary artistic crosscurrents presiding over the major developments in modern art that took place in Germany and France between 1900 and 1914. 1380 Sherbrooke Street West, www.mbam.qc.ca If the marvels and genius of the impressionists aren’t for you, then maybe finding out where Montreal was born might be. Always worth a visit, Pointe-àCallière is Montreal’s Museum of Archaeology and History. Located on de la Commune in Vieux-Port Montreal, this museum’s permanent exhibition,
Where Montreal Was Born, offers visitors a glimpse into the history of this fascinating city. Pointe-àCallière, 350 Place Royale, www.pacmusee.qc.ca If shopping is more to your liking, then a stroll down rue Saint Paul Est will bring you to historic Marché Bonsecours. Inaugurated in 1847, it is acknowledged as one of Canada’s 10 finest heritage buildings and has become an essential stop on any visit to VieuxMontreal. A bastion for ‘homegrown’ talent, the Marché houses 15 boutiques featuring top-quality “made in Quebec” creations: Crafts, fashions, jewelry and accessories. 150 rue Saint Paul Est, www.marchebonsecours.qc.ca . ■
photos by graham Farkas
Explore
Want to get IN FRONT of INBETWEEN?
Going to Montréal offers the ideal opportunity to treat yourself to VIA Rail’s business class – especially if you’re coming from Toronto or Ottawa. Let the rest of the commuters deal with traffic while you sit back and enjoy free food, drinks and Wi-Fi all in a spacious car that lets you stretch your legs or snooze away the miles. And unlike taking to the skies, passengers are given free baggage options and convenient downtown arrivals and departures. Even the most anxious of travellers can relax in its Panorama Business Class lounge that allows you to sip coffee and read while the professionals at VIA do the rest.
Advertise with us and get your company front of mind with one of Canada’s most powerful demographic — parents of teens and young adults! Contact info@inbetween.ca for more info.
for parents caught in the middle of raising a teen & young adult
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YOUR TODAY. their TOMORROW.
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for parents caught in the middle of raising a teen & young adult