Lake Norman Woman September 2019

IT RUNS IN THE FAMILY:

LKN Families Who

WORK

together pg. 16

featuring

family Dr. Julie Spivey of Lake Norman Pediatric Dentistry

THE

ISSUE

IO N AN NUAL PE T SE CT

the cutest

LKN PET CONTEST

winner

& more! pg. 49

THAT’S WHAT HE SAID:

Life in LKN from the MALE PERSPECTIVE pg. 46

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SEPTEMBER 2019

7

FIND US ON

LAKE

NORMAN

V O L U M E

X I I I

,

WOMAN

N U M B E R

I I I

from the

womenpower

T H I S I S O U R FA M I LY I S S U E , A S W E L L A S O U R P E T I S S U E , and

it occurred to me as I was deciding what to write in this month’s letter that a person can learn a lot from a pet about family. My dog, Bo, was the master at teaching such lessons.

Not the most excitable of canines, Bo didn’t greet me with jumps and sloppy kisses when I came home from work as many dogs do, just the hearty thump, thump, thump of his tail against the floor. When I walked from one room into the next, thump, thump, thump. When I rolled over at night in my bed … thump, thump, thump. Bo could be a bit cantankerous, though. He didn’t shadow me around the house, nor leap with bounding enthusiasm into my lap, and there were times as he grew old and achy that he didn’t even bother to lift his head off the floor in greeting. But I knew he loved me and that he was constantly watching out for me through the steadfast thump, thump, thump.

Bo was one of my favorites of the dogs I’ve had, in part because he didn’t make it easy for people to like him. In addition to the grumpiness, he was scared of almost anything—a broom, a bee, my husband, raindrops … his own flatulence. Though a beautiful specimen of a Labrador, he refused to retrieve, instead looking at you as if he thought throwing that perfectly good stick was the stupidest thing he’d ever seen a human do. Before we adopted him, he had been abused and humans were not his favorite species. Miraculously, Bo did decide to love and trust us, and what he lacked in unabashed affection he gave wholeheartedly in loyalty, devotion, and that wonderful thumping tail.

TAMMI PHRONEBARGER

KIM CROSS

We know going in that a dog isn’t going to live forever, but it doesn’t make watching them age any easier. We always thought his hips would be Bo’s kryptonite, but it was cancer that made him so ill he couldn’t eat or even breathe very well, though his ever-enthusiastic tail thumped until the very end.

Bo taught me so much about family…like how to appreciate the small stuff, such as a walk after dinner (his 2nd favorite treat) or an unexpected pleasure, such as a pork chop bone (His favorite treat—he even jumped up and down a little for that one and didn’t seem to mind that it gave him diarrhea.

Terrible diarrhea.).

Mostly Bo taught me that loving someone doesn’t have to be complicated; that I could love the same way he loved us: simply and purely with no ulterior motives, mind games, secondguessing, guilt trips, or grudges.

Bo didn’t set out to teach me about family or love… but I learned so much from him by watching him interact with the world around him. He loved the best in me and the worst in me. What would our world look like if we could love like that? w DANA NIETERS PUBLISHER

SEPTEMBER CONTRIBUTORS:

Cyndy Etler; William P. Lavietes, MD; Michelle Love; Starr Miller; Christine Patterson; Mimi Sherman CONTACT US:

704.895.6168

PO BOX 1000 | CORNELI US, NC | 28031

W W W. L A K E N O R M A N W O M A N . C O M AD SUBMISSIONS:

ADS@LAKENORMANWOMAN.COM Lake Norman Woman reserves the right to deny any advertisement or listing that does not meet Lake Norman Woman standards. Submissions are welcome but unsolicited materials are not guaranteed to be returned.

Lake Norman Woman assumes no responsibility for information, products, services, or statements made by advertisers or editorial contributors. An advertised special printed in this publication is subject to change without notice. All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or in part without written permission from the publisher is prohibited.

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SEPTEMBER 2019

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CELEBRATING THE

SUCCESS

OF

WOMEN

contents september 2019

p

49

Treat them like family with the help of LKN's finest & more resources in our annual Pet Pages

40 gwynn p

S D R O W matter

LINDLER

PHOTO: DEBORAH YOUNG STUDIO

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SEPTEMBER 2019

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p

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Be inspired every month with some of our favorite quotes—this month all about pets & family

24

p

Don't Let Indoor Allergens Take Over Your Home

FEATURES 14

MY FAVORITE THINGS: Katie Stankiewicz

16

ALL IN THE FAMILY: Families Who Work Together

22

HERE SHE IS: Vanessa A. Richardson

28

WOMAN TO WATCH: Patti Alvarez

32

COVER STORY: Striking A Balance

40

WHAT I KNOW NOW: Gwynn Lindler

46

THAT'S WHAT HE SAID: Justin Dionne

vanessa a.

RICHARDSON

p

22

FAMILY

SPECIAL PET SECTION

18

He Said, She Said …

26

TEENS ALOUD: The Mystery Of Motivating Your Teen

ANNUAL PET PAGES!

HEALTH 20 24

50

Love Is A Four-Legged Word

52

Just Wait A Doggone Minute!

53

September Is Childhood Cancer Awareness Month

The Cat's Out Of The Bag

54

8 THINGS: Eight Things Your Favorite Dog Breed Says About You

Don't Let Indoor Allergens Take Over Your Home

HOME 30

Hand Me Downs Or Not?

SELF 42

Plan Like A Pro

58

MIND, BODY, SPIRIT: The Art Of Mindful Listening

ON THE COVER: DR. JULIE SPIVEY (WITH HER SWEET DOG, DOUG!) OF LAKE NORMAN PEDIATRIC DENTISTRY P H O T O G R A P H Y : CHELSEA BREN

in every issue 12

LIVE, LEARN, GROW

38

36

SCENE WITH LKNW

28 patti p

ALVAREZ

WOMEN ON THE MOVE

56

WORDS MATTER

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LIVE, LEARN,

"

“WHEN ALL THE DUST IS SETTLED AND ALL THE CROWDS ARE GONE, THE THINGS THAT MATTER ARE FAITH, FAMILY, AND FRIENDS.”

Life takes practice! And though they don’t always come wrapped in a shiny red bow, the lessons we learn along the way are invaluable gifts that are worth sharing. Here are a few learned by some of the women featured in this issue: PATTI ALVAREZ, owner

of Good Soul Hot Yoga in Mooresville, shines bright on page 28 with a beautiful message of kindness and love: “I believe gratitude is EVERYTHING, and joy is a splendid gift that I intend to share with the world!”

– BARBARA BUSH

A BIG ALOHA awaits you on page

32 where Dr. Julie Spivey, owner of Lake Norman Pediatric Dentistry, shares her strategy on balancing life.

After living and working in Hawaii, Dr. Spivey and her husband found that the Aloha Spirit is alive and well in Lake Norman!

SKIP ON OVER TO PAGE 16 where LKN families share their strategies, tips, and advice

in our special section, Families Who Work Together—from husband and wife teams to a fifth-generation company, we introduce you to some of the area’s finest.

TO STAY PRESENT AND TRULY HEAR WHAT ANOTHER PERSON IS

COMMUNICATING TAKES PRACTICE.

FLIP ON OVER TO

page 58 TO GET

A CRASH COURSE ON MINDFUL LISTENING

WITH LKNW

CONTRIBUTING WRITER AND

CREDENTIALED MINDFULNESS

VANESSA RICHARDSON, owner of Cygnal Consulting, shows us on page 22 what

tenacity, strength, and courage look like. An Army veteran, Vanessa’s can-do, never-giveup attitude has proven her successful in the service, in life, and in business.

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SEPTEMBER 2019

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MEDITATION

INSTRUCTOR,

MIMI SHERMAN.

w

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my

favorite things Below Katie shares some of her favorite things (in addition to horses!)—

AWAY FROM THE FARM.

KATIE STANKIEWICZ

Willow Equine and Mind, Body & Sole Equine

Born and raised in the small farming town of Rutland, Massachusetts, Katie Stankiewicz (owner of Willow Equine and Mind, Body & Sole Equine in Mooresville) never imagined leaving her hometown but, at just 19 years old, opportunity knocked and led her to North Carolina and the world of equine-assisted psychotherapy and development.

“Horses, as our co-facilitators, work to encourage a deeper connection between personal and interpersonal relationships,” Katie explains. “Willow Equine offers an unconventional approach to traditional talk therapy, team building, and business development. It is about reflection, analysis, and action.”

With Katie and her team at the reins, clients develop authenticity, empowerment, and teamwork while learning about themselves and others. The human/horse interaction fosters development of thoughts, beliefs, behaviors, and patterns. It is proven to be the most powerful approach to helping clients achieve and sustain personal and professional growth.

“I was introduced to the Eagala model of equine-assisted psychotherapy in 2009,” Katie says, “and I knew that it was a powerful way to offer an unconventional approach to therapy and team building. It allows for introspection, healing, and growth outside the confinement of four walls and words. I became a certified leadership coach in 2012 and added equine-assisted business coaching—for leaders to add horsepower in both life and business! I love working outside with my horses and seeing clients transform into the best version of themselves.”

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“There are so many great places to travel!

I love the beach and the mountains and everything in between. Disney is a special place for my family. We go every year in December for our anniversary and our daughter’s birthday. The history, magic, music, and holiday spirit make it a special place to visit.”

JUST HORSIN’ AROUND. “I love family time.

Being outside. My animals. I love to ride my horse, enjoy a bonfire with friends, or read a good book.”

WHEN I’M NOT IN MY BOOTS. “I LOVE A GOOD PAIR OF HEELS! THEY ARE A STATEMENT PIECE FOR ANY OUTFIT … I KNOW I WAS MORE EXCITED ABOUT MY WEDDING SHOES THAN MY WEDDING DRESS!” EMBRACING THE NOW. “I cherish the diversity in my weekly schedule – the different horses, people, and places. I start my days with a workout. It allows me to start fresh with physical, emotional, and spiritual balance.

I love ending my day reading with my daughter and sharing our days. The events that happen in between are wonderful adventures!” w

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awareness for childhood cancer, and we love that they are able to be so involved in that part of our work. In fact, our two sons have raised over $1,000 for local charities with lemonade stands. The money has gone into our 501(c)(3) to help host events at no cost to local charitable organizations.”

ADJUST COURSE WHEN NEEDED. “It is easy

Charters f�r Charity / Car�lina Grace WHO WORKS TOGETHER:

A L L I N T H E FA M I LY:

w�rk families who

TOG

for work to always be there because we both are so heavily involved! We have to be purposeful about protecting our downtime. And, most importantly, we have an extremely strong team on the Carolina Grace … Captain Andy and Helen, our yacht manager, are SUCH a blessing!”

Husband and wife team Kim HAVING FUN AND LOVING LIFE. “We love anything outdoors—paddle boarding, and Stephen Branum SPREAD THE LOVE AND PAY IT FORWARD! “We love to

involve our children in every way possible with the yacht and our charity events. Our charity is heavily focused on raising money and

mountain biking, going to the mountains, and watching our kids play soccer.

Stephen is also a PA for OrthoCarolina part time, and I teach high school chorus as well. The balance of those positions is amazing and gives us the ability to follow our passions as well as drive a business and charity that we believe so strongly in.”

ETHER

ALL FOR ONE AND ONE FOR ALL.

“Thankfully, our dad was around to see us get the business started and after he passed, Mom joined us. When business gets heavy, especially during the holidays, everyone steps up and helps where they can. Our staff members even have friends who come help out … it’s a fun, fastpaced, exhausting time and we love it!”

A Different Kind of Fairytale— Once upon a time in jolly old England, about 1066 or so, the Norman barons introduced surnames. Before that, people simply went by a personal name or nickname. Surnames were derived from the skills, crafts, or jobs a man did. If a man was a carpenter, he might be called Joe Carpenter and

WHO WORKS TOGETHER:

because sons very often followed

Sisters Heather Scovel and Jodi Wright with mom Nicki Vipperma

their father’s occupation, the surname

LIFE HAPPENS. “The best part of

stuck. Family businesses are a win-win as they benefit both local and global economies. And as for the family unit itself, it’s a big WIN there too. Check out these families who have mastered working (and playing!) together—

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Sav�ry M�ments Catering & Magn�lia W��ds Events

SEPTEMBER 2019

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being a family business is we have each other’s back. Being in business together for 10 years now, life happens and our personal journeys continue – loved ones pass, personal health issues arise, graduations, college, vacations. Through the smiles and the tears no matter what happens, we know we can count on each other – we try to keep each other strong and moving forward.”

SISTERLY LOVE. “There are always

differences of opinions (we’re sisters after all!), but we know how to get over our stubbornness and look to the future of the business and the needs of our clients.

Bottomline is that we respect and love each other, and we each bring our own unique knowledge and talents to the table.”

HOSPITALITY IS 24/7. “Keeping our business separate from all other aspects of our lives is difficult because it’s a 7-days-a-week kind of schedule. To keep priorities in check, we really have to plan ahead, skip out a few afternoons early, and delegate! The team is highly capable of carrying the load, we just have to let go.”

and your family, and this was especially evident during the recession back in 2007.

It was a scary time … the bottom fell out; orders were cancelled; the phone ceased to ring. But we would NOT give up! All of us worked long hours and did whatever it took to keep the business running.”

STICK TO YOUR VALUES. “We have a lot of

Cl�setsbyDesign WHO WORKS TOGETHER: Laura and Eric VanSickle; Laura’s two sisters Diana and Christa and their mother, Joyce

TAKING A CHANCE. “We took a huge risk in

2004 and jumped in headfirst as franchise owners. Our first call came in before our office was even set up, so I answered it on a line rerouted to my cell phone while driving home from dinner. I wrote the appointment down on the back of a takeout box and the rest is history.”

BUT THE ROAD ISN’T EASY! “No one cares as much about your business as you

values that are important to us as a family, and we try to live those same values at work. We view our customers as guests in our home, and we try to make them feel like family so they enjoy their visit with us.

And our employees are like our extended family. It’s important to us that they know how much we love and appreciate them."

IT’S JUST PART OF LIFE … AND LIFE IS GOOD! “When you own your own business, there is never a weekend off or a night off. Our kids grew up hearing ‘closet talk’ at the table each night. It’s inevitable. But I think they learned a lot from it. Now one of our sons is considering entering the business. He worked with us this summer, and it was great to be together every day.

What mother wouldn’t love that?”

Pam and Ed Hill and their son, Tim

JUST TWO DREAMERS DREAMIN’. “In

ourselves on being a familyowned and family-focused business with a deep faith in God. Even our many repeat guests have become like family to us. I married my husband at 18 and we have two grown children. Both of them started in the business and worked with us for the first eight years but then went their separate ways; however, our son, Tim, has returned to help us run things and is a great partner for us with a long outlook for the future of Stony Brook. He’s a real asset.”

and Claudia Kepner with son Jonathan and his wife, Lindsey

SINCE 1845! “John’s family has been in the

funeral business since 1845, so when we married in 1980, I knew what we would be doing. In 2011, we moved to Lake Norman and bought what is now RaymerKepner Funeral Home.”

to work for a company that provided burial insurance, we met the lovely Lindsey. She moved back to Florida but we kept in touch and, when one of our staff retired, we offered her a full-time position. It wouldn’t be long before Jonathan and Lindsey started dating, and we are now blessed to have her as a daughter-in-law and as a valuable member of our work family as well.”

WHO WORKS TOGETHER:

WE ARE FAMILY! “We pride

WHO WORKS TOGETHER: John

WELCOMING NEW FAMILY TO A FAMILY BUSINESS. “After moving here from Florida

St�ny Br��k Cabins, LLC

2004, Ed and I came to Gatlinburg to buy ourselves a vacation home, found one, bought it, and 30 days later we were living here in the Smokies and had purchased an existing cabin rental company. It was very much God’s plan and He led every step of the way.”

Raymer-Kepner Funeral H�me & Cremati�n Services

KEEPING THE FAITH. “As a family, we have WHEN THE ROAD GETS DARK. “We were

profitable immediately, but not very. When the market crashed in 2008, things were very difficult; people were not doing vacations … they were saving and being careful. Then in 2011, just about the time our business was turning a corner, I was diagnosed with breast cancer—but with my husband and family by my side and God lifting us up, I sailed through treatments and worked the entire time.”

KEEPING THE RIGHT PERSPECTIVE. “You

have to manage family and work time very carefully. We finally were able to take every weekend off starting two years ago … raising two of our grandkids for the past six years, this was very important to us. We also try to make sure evenings are family time.”

always looked to each other for love and support. Being in the funeral business, we recognize the importance of life, and we don’t let time slip away … we take nothing for granted. We are strong in our faith and are reminded daily that you must seize the moment and make each day count. Life goes by in an instant, and we want to be able to look back and be proud of our accomplishments and, most importantly, leave a loving memory.”

THE TRADITION CONTINUES. “While our

roles have changed throughout the years, we stay firm in our respect for each other and what each person does individually for the business. Jonathan is a fifth-generation funeral director, so we are extremely blessed to have our familyfocused business carried on in this way.” w

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family

HE Said, SHE Said …

RESOLVING CONFLICTS AT HOME

CONFLICT RESOLUTION ADVICE Begin with empathy.

Let the other person know that you see them, you hear them, you can put yourself in their shoes. Really try to see things from their perspective.

1

© Syda Productions | Dreamstime.com

“Children are like emotional Geiger counters,” says E. Mark Cummings, psychologist at Notre Dame University, who has published hundreds of papers on the subject. “Kids pay close attention to their parents’ emotions for information about how safe they are in the family,” Cummings notes. When parents fight in front of the children, the damage to kids can last a lifetime. With that said, here are some noteworthy insights and advice gathered at www.academictree.org---

CONFLICT IS NORMAL, so it’s not whether parents fight that is important but how the conflict is expressed and resolved when the children are present. But it is also important to remember NOT to involve children in adult issues. That means serious disagreements should be resolved behind closed doors.

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SEPTEMBER 2019

NEVER ENGAGE IN VERBAL aggression such as namecalling, insults, and threats of abandonment; physical aggression such as hitting and pushing; or unproductive silent tactics such as avoidance, walking out, or withdrawing.

WHEN CHILDREN ARE WITNESS to hostile words, actions, and an overall negative tone in the home, they can (and often do!) become distraught, worried, and anxious. It can then in turn lead to aggression and behavioral problems at home and at school.

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CHILDREN RAISED IN environments of destructive conflict have problems forming healthy, balanced relationships with their siblings and peers, according to Cummings' research.

CHILDREN WHO WERE INSECURE in kindergarten because of their parents’ conflicts were more likely to have adjustment problems in middle and high school. “A recent study showed that even 20-yearolds remained sensitive to parental conflict.

Contrary to what one might hope, kids don’t get used to it,” says Cummings.

Give your partner the benefit of the doubt. Know that they are doing the best they can with the skill set they’ve been given.

Remember to infuse your words with love and terms of endearment.

2

Remember that you’re on the same team. You want to focus on problem-solving.

Don’t be a “right fighter” … see things through their lens and work to solve what is in front of you with more intellect and insight, less ego and emotion.

3

Say it with kindness.

Let your words go through the filter of “Is it kind? Is it helpful? Is it necessary?" If it doesn’t meet that criteria, keep it to yourself. Disapproval, disappointment, exasperation can all be handled better with a kind heart and gentle words. w

4

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SEPTEMBER IS

childhood cancer awareness month

EVERY YEAR, MORE PARENTS ARE FORCED

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Michelle Love is the president and founder of the Stand Firm Warrior Foundation, a 501c3 nonprofit organization. Their mission is to fight childhood cancer by providing support to pediatric cancer initiatives focused on complementary and alternative treatments to chemotherapy; to continue to further the push for awareness of childhood cancer; and to provide assistance to families with children battling the disease.

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into confronting something they never thought would be a part of their lives – childhood cancer.

In 2012, I was one of those parents. At the age of 11, my normally healthy, athletic, breast-fed, fruit and veggie-eating son was diagnosed with the most curable and most common type of childhood cancer. We were immediately thrust into a world of uncertainty, that came with a whole new vocabulary, and with terrifying thoughts and concerns. Two and a half years into his treatment, the cancer relapsed and ten months later, he passed away, just two days after his 15th birthday.

Childhood cancer is the #1 cause of death by disease among children up to 19 years old, and 35 percent of children diagnosed with cancer will die within 30 years. Approximately 17 percent, or 1 in 5, die within five years of initial diagnosis. For survivors, more than 95 percent are plagued with significant health-related problems by the time they are 45 years old. This is why it is so important for less-toxic treatments to be researched. Many hospitals across the country, including Levine Children’s Hospital in Charlotte, are evolving to include alternative and adjunct therapies, such as Reiki, music and art therapies, acupuncture, massage, and targeted nutrition as a way to support the child’s overall health during chemotherapy and radiation treatments.

In 2013, there were nearly 390,000 childhood cancer survivors, but that number is expected to grow to more than 500,000 by next year. The incidence of childhood cancer has seen an overall increase of 24 percent over the last 40 years. Even with this continued increase in new cases each year, the National Cancer Institute -the federal department of government that funds cancer research -only spent an average of 3.94 percent from 2007-2016 on studies focused on pediatric cancer.

Because of this disparity in funding, non-profit organizations have stepped up to fill the gap and make a difference for our children for generations to come. Foundations like CureSearch and Alex’s Lemonade Stand directly fund childhood cancer research projects and are responsible for helping to bring new options to the table.

Often, parents who have accompanied their child through the world of cancer are the light-bearers for the ones who follow behind them. There are many non-profit organizations that were born from the pain of the childhood cancer journey, including child loss, because parents know all too well that nothing will change without them leading the charge. I invite you to join the fight for our children and their future. w

*Data from www.cac2.org/childhood-cancer-fact-library-2018/ **CureSearch.org ***AlexsLemonade.org

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FEATU R E

H O M E TO W N : NYC

here she is!

L K N TO W N : DAVIDSON

What has been your most life-altering event?

My daughter, hands down, has changed my life. I had her after 40 and had always felt quite accomplished in life. The first night in the hospital with her, every success I had accumulated in my life was somehow underneath this moment. Nothing seemed as important as she did. Twenty months later, I still firmly believe that the best decision I made was to stay home with her for as long as I can.

It may take some time to re-enter the workforce, but I know I can never get these years back.

What one quality of yours has been the most helpful in your life? I think clearly and quickly

under pressure. When I was 14, I was caught underwater by a rope that was securing a float to the bottom of the lake. Instead of panicking, I heard my mother’s and my grandfather’s voices tell me to be calm and think my way out. I realized the rope that was secured to the bottom of the lake was wrapped around my leg. Remaining calm, and with my remaining breath, I swam down instead of up, loosening the rope and freeing myself in the process. When I broke the surface, a few other kids were diving in to find me. I had been under for quite a while.

Professionally, while I concentrate on guiding teams in mitigating risks, it helps to know how to think through difficult situations when risks occur.

HOUSEHOLD: HUSBAND RAND AND 18-MONTH-OLD DAUGHTER A L O N G W I T H T H E FA M I LY ’ S F U R B A B Y, S A B L E

Who is your inspiration? The women

in my life: my daughter, mother, and sister. I have worked with a lot of men over the years, and learned lessons from them in confidence and capability, but when things get hard and challenges seem almost too daunting, I always think about my mother. She would never quit and never accept quitting from me! She is the amazing example I emulate for my own daughter, and my younger sister. w

Army veteran Vanessa A. Richardson, RMP (Risk Management Professional), is the owner and founder of Cygnal Consulting, LLC. Providing risk management solutions for clients worldwide, Vanessa is based in Davidson and can be reached at vrichardson@cygnalconsulting.com

What is your advice for women?

You can influence more than you could imagine. Ninety-eight percent of the reasons we think we can’t do something is actually created and resides in our own minds. Start by believing that basic truth. When confronted with an obstacle, begin your assessment and response planning with the assumption that you can influence all of the necessary factors. Be creative! We can influence our circumstances more than we know.

vanessa a. richardson i am an LKNw oman because…

"We are so happy to call the Lake Norman area home. As Army officers and in our professional careers, we have had the opportunity to live in 18 states and six countries. We chose this area for the plethora of natural beauty, outdoor activities, schools, and neighborhoods. Personally and professionally, I commit to delivering excellence and enjoy living in an area that offers my family so many prospects for a full life."

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WRITER MICHELLE LOVE

PHOTOGRAPHER CHELSEA BREN

iredellhealth.org • 704.873.5661

“Iredell treats you like family.”

Imagine not being able to breathe while having a conversation. What if daily tasks were exhausting?

For Joyce Miller, that was reality. Thanks to Iredell Health System’s Cardiopulmonary Rehabilitation program, she’s now back doing the things she loves without a struggle.

We were there for Joyce, and we’ll be there for you and your family too. This is your health — don’t settle for anything but the best.

My health.

My Iredell.

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health

DON’T LET INDOOR ALLERGENS

E M O H R U O Y R E V O TAKE MILLIONS SUFFER FROM ALLERGIES

caused by indoor allergens including dust mites, molds, house pets, and cockroaches. Normally, our immune system responds by making antibodies to foreign invaders like bacteria or viruses. However, those prone to develop allergies have an over-reactive immune response and produce antibodies called IgE which recognize these allergens as potentially harmful, even though they are not. IgE antibodies trigger allergy cells to react, leading to hay fever, asthma symptoms, and sinus infections.

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William P. Lavietes, MD, is a board-certified asthma and allergy specialist with Carolina Asthma & Allergy Center. For more information or to schedule an appointment at one of their locations, you may call them at 704.372.7900 or visit www.carolinaasthma.com.

To confirm allergies, examination often reveals swollen, pale nasal passages; red, watery eyes; or wheezing and cough. Allergy skin testing helps identify specific allergy triggers by placing drops of different allergens onto the skin of the patient’s forearm or back. In allergic individuals, a red, itchy bump develops within 15 minutes where the drop was pricked onto the skin. If skin testing is not possible, a blood test can measure specific IgE antibodies to each allergen.

Oral medications to treat nasal allergy symptoms include antihistamines to relieve itching, sneezing, and runny nose; decongestants to shrink swollen nasal passages; and leukotriene blockers to prevent nasal and respiratory symptoms. Steroid nasal sprays help to reduce inflammation and swelling as well.

Non-drug therapies include immunotherapy, which involves regular exposure to controlled doses of allergens to which a person is allergic.

First-line treatment for controlling indoor allergies should be directed at avoiding or minimizing exposure to the offending allergens (triggers), which can help reduce the frequency and severity of allergy symptoms.

For dust mite allergies, patients

should encase the mattress, pillows, and box spring; wash bedding weekly in hot water (130 F); keep relative humidity below 50 percent; wash stuffed toys and keep them off beds; vacuum carpeting and upholstered furniture with HEPA filter vacuums; reduce overall clutter; and remove carpet wherever possible.

There are no true “hypoallergenic” breeds of dogs

or cats. Pet-allergic individuals are not allergic to their pet’s hair, but to allergens found in the urine, saliva, or dander of furry animals. Regular bathing of dogs and cats is recommended to reduce dander levels.

Keeping rodent and bird cages clean can reduce allergens as well. Always keep pets out of the bedrooms of those with allergies.

Mold allergy is controlled by

keeping humidity levels under 40 percent using air conditioning throughout the summer and cleaning visible mold from walls, ceilings, and showers with five percent bleach solution to reduce mold growth inside.

Indoor allergens can be a common trigger in allergic individuals, contributing to eyes, nose, throat, and lung symptoms. First-line treatments should focus on elimination or reduction of allergens in the home. Medications can help relieve allergy symptoms when avoidance is not enough. Immunotherapy can desensitize allergic individuals by “turning off” an overactive immune response and more effectively manage symptoms over time. Take back control of your home by keeping it allergen-free and minimize your sneezing and wheezing. w

Image by evening_tao / Freepik

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WRITER WILLIAM P. LAVIETES, MD

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F AMI LY

teens aloud!

Want to have your struggle considered for an upcoming Teens Aloud column? Send Cyndy an email about what’s going on at cyndy@theteenlifecoach.com

teens aloud!

YOUR TEEN,

the mystery of your teen

TRANSLATED

MOTIVATION. It’s the Rubik’s cube of parenting teens; the single greatest reason parents reach out to me for teen life coaching.

Parents express their concern in different ways: “He’s very intelligent, but he doesn’t put emphasis on his grades,” says one.

“She did so well through middle school but now, in her junior year, she doesn’t seem to care,” says another. “We just want them to be prepared for happiness and success in adulthood!” says everyone. “I’ve tried everything, and nothing works. I’m tearing my hair out!” says the subtext.

© Wavebreakmedia Ltd | Dreamstime.com

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When I was a little kid, my mother came up with an idea to motivate me and my stepsiblings to do our chores. It was the classic carrotand-stick scheme involving a chart, assigned tasks, and a reward pictured at the far end of the empty Cyndy Etler is a contributing and freelance writer for Lake Norman Woman Magazine. An award-winning young adult author and a board-certified teen life coach, you can connect with Cyndy at www.theteenlifecoach.com.

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checkboxes. I remember the thrill of potential energy. I could actually get that Barbie doll! What I don’t remember is putting in hours scooping kitty litter, unloading the dishwasher, or shoveling snow.

No surprise, then, that I don’t remember actually getting my hands on that Barbie doll.

Today, having studied the psychology of motivation and behavioral change, I understand. I know why that chart, bewitching as it was, netted so few results. To be sustainable, motivation must be intrinsic—it has to come from inside the person doing the action. In other words, each human does only the things that they, themselves, have a personal drive to achieve.

For younger kids, the drive to please the parent can be enough of a motivator to complete icky tasks. But once kids hit adolescence and gain some autonomy of body and mind, that goal tends to take a backseat. It’s replaced by new intrinsic motivators, often related to friends or appearance or entertaining pastimes.

Here’s how that dynamic plays out. The kid who loves the game of football, or who thrives in the team dynamic, or who’s deeply driven to play pro ball? That kid knows they have to maintain a certain GPA to stay on the team, and that kid will do whatever it takes to make the grades. But take a kid on that team who started playing at a parent’s suggestion, but never really loved it, or one who doesn’t enjoy the increased competitiveness at the varsity level and perceives no long-term benefit from playing, and you’ll see a whole different set of behaviors. On the field, in the classroom or in the locker room, the lack of true personal motivation will show up, one way or another.

Here’s the good news: there are ways to increase adolescent motivation. Using research-based strategies to help kids understand what they want and how to achieve it, I’ve ushered in miracles. Want to learn how the process works?

Meet me here at my locker—same time: after last block, before ball practice—next month! w

WRITER CYNDY ETLER

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self

FEATU R E

woman to watch on A HAPPY CHILDHOOD: My father worked hard in a tire business he started, and eventually parlayed it into a small empire. My mother was an Italian stay-at-home mom who took pleasure in cooking, decorating, singing, dancing, and adventuring. Every day was a holiday. My parents could not have encouraged me and my sisters more, and they continue to do so from the heavens. My parents were the most loving, supportive, and cherished folks I could have ever dreamed of having, and their legacy lives on BIG time!

patti alvarez GOOD SOUL HOT YOGA Mooresville

on FAMILY: My husband, Manny, and I grew up in the same hometown – Middletown, New Jersey. My father and I did business with his brother, and he came up to a party where we met.

It was love at first sight, but having a long-distance relationship for two years was physically painful.

We took extreme care with our relationship and the blending of three teenage girls. We all fell in love and remain as close as can be. Jessie is 24, Rachel is 20, and Molly is 18. We also have our doggies, Shanti and Murphy, and two Persian cats, Baby and Frida. on KNOWING WITHOUT A DOUBT: I am firmly grounded, and I believe that all roads have led to my position as owner of Good Soul. When I look back on my life, every twist, turn, tragedy, and triumph had an absolute purpose. I believe gratitude is EVERYTHING, and joy is a splendid gift that I intend to share with the world! I plan to soak up every single ounce of the goodness I’ve been blessed with, shine as bright as I can, and lift up and inspire those around me. I fully believe that this will, in turn, make the world a better place for generations to come.

PATTI alvarez

LKNW RECOGNIZES A WOMAN DOING EXCEPTIONAL WORK IN THE L A K E N O R M A N C O M M U N I T Y, A L E A D E R W H O I S PAV I N G T H E W AY T O C H A N G I N G O U R AT T I T U D E S A N D I N S P I R I N G C O N F I D E N C E I N T H E F U T U R E .

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on LOVING LIFE: One beautiful aspect of entrepreneurship is that it gives you the ability to explore so many fascinating paths. I enable the studio to be a source of empowerment in the lives of our students and serve as a launching pad for some pretty awesome plans: the book I am authoring, the TED talk I plan to deliver, and a round-table television show I’d like to produce – focusing on unifying humans and breaking down the divide that exists. I am happy with my place in the world and keenly aware that life is constantly taking new shapes. Being present and grateful for the “now” is what I strive for in all aspects of life. w Patti Alvarez is a loving wife, kick-butt mom, and the owner of Good Soul Hot Yoga in Mooresville. For more information on classes, schedules, and pricing, please visit her website www.goodsoulyoga.com.

WRITER MICHELLE LOVE

PHOTOGRAPHER CHELSEA BREN

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home

HAND ME DOWNS or not?

The other day we were offered my husband’s Great Aunt Mary’s desk. Our decision came down to one simple question: Did we love it enough to get rid of something else?

SH O WH O USE R E P O R T – SE P T E M B E R 2 0 1 9

Over the past two to three years, the Interior Design Society of Charlotte (IDS) has been working to find the right location to produce a Designer Showhouse.

Last year IDS formed a great partnership with three of our area’s top builders: Southern Cottage Corporation, Plattner Custom Builders and Augusta Homes to build not just one, but three Custom Designer Showhouses in the Narrow Passage subdivision of Davidson.

These houses will benefit four charities: Motor Racing Outreach, The Hendrick Family Foundation, The Dale Jr. Foundation and Operation Finally Home.

This got me thinking. Families have these discussions every day, how is design impacted and how is it changing?

the trends:

Home Size - The day of the McMansion may be passing. Right sizing is the trend.

Less is more. Perfection in less space is on the rise. I like to call it, "the perfect jewel box home."

As the Co-chair of this event I will, over the next several months, share some insights into what it takes to bring a charity showhouse to life. It is not for the weak minded. Currently we have: One cul-de-sac, three builders, three house captains, 45 designers and 80 volunteers.

There is a lot of excitement and there will be many ways that you will be able to participate between now and March 2020.

Own or Rent Your Home - Experts have noted, that millennials do not want to own, they would rather rent. They do not want to commit. They want it inexpensive and they want choices in the future. Clearly, they do NOT want mom and dad’s hand-me-down furniture. And, just like regular retail, antique stores are closing left and right.

Own or Rent Your Furniture – In the news subscription furniture (think Stitch Fix for your home) is making waves for people who move often or are unsure of their choices. No commitment sells.

Condos and apartments set up before you arrive. The new players getting notice in this area are LiveFeather.com and The Everset, coming soon.

Good Stewardship - A healthy planet is imperative for our future family.

Throw-away furniture does not bode well for limiting waste and debris.

Does inexpensive furniture work with the planet? Does well-made, longlasting furniture become an heirloom?

Confusion!!!!

How to sort through the confusion:

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1 If you plan to move in less than three years consider modular furniture or even a subscription furniture service if you aren’t interested in custom.

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Check out our website at idscltshowhouse.com to keep up with what is going on!

.

REMEMBER:

You cannot see inside cheap furniture to see how it is made.

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Cheaply constructed furniture cannot be reupholstered.

.

Cheaply constructed furniture

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has a lifespan expectation of 2-4 years at best.

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Clean-lined, wellmade furniture will last you a lifetime.

.

Your children want what they want, don’t count on handing it down.

2 If you are in a home you plan to stay in for 7+ years, buy what you want, buy quality, and choose something you will be happy with for a long time. This will not only

Starr Miller is the president and principal of StarrMiller Interior Design located in Cornelius. Her national award-winning firm specializes in residential new construction and renovations. For more information visit www.StarrMiller.com or call 704-896-3321.

mean you have a lovely home, but it also means that you are not buying large, throw-away items that will fill up a landfill.

3 Do not expect that

what you choose will sell on the secondary market.

4 Do not expect that it will become a family heirloom; passed down generation to generation.

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FEATU R E

cover story

balance

striking a

When you speak with Dr. Julie Spivey, owner of

Lake Norman Pediatric Dentistry in Denver, you’ll notice how calm you feel. Ask about her philosophy of life, and that calming effect makes sense. In a world of extremes—in sports (Ironman! Insanity!), in home size (McMansions! Tiny homes!), in social media

s

followings (the Kardashians! Cardi B!)—Dr. Julie embodies the opposite: balance.

WRITER CYNDY ETLER

PHOTOGRAPHER CHELSEA BREN

he had to develop that balance early, in order to stand up and walk. Dr. Julie has this huge brain, you see, in the top quarter of her body, and this huge heart down lower. Carrying those enormous, active organs around requires a powerful steadiness, one which she now applies to all areas of life.

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When you ask Dr. Julie about her life, the heart and the brain take turns telling their stories. She cites her mom, who raised her sister and herself as a single, working mother, as her inspiration.

She wraps a long list of attributes up with, “She is beautiful, inside and out.

Godly, selfless, loving...she epitomizes everything I hope to be as a mother one day.

You should write an article about her, not me.”

With the next breath, her heart keeps singing. “My grandmother helped raise us.

She worked nights as a nurse and kept us after school, often staying overnight if my mom had to travel. I’m still trying to figure out when she slept!”

Then her brain takes over, translating the lessons she learned from these women into her professional life.

“When I began the search for employees, I knew I wanted a ‘work family,’

not a staff. We’re in a field that primarily has been dominated by male leadership, with women playing the supporting role.

As more female dentists emerge, coming together as a tribe of women is critical.

We don’t have time or energy for pettiness—we’ve got little ones to entertain and care for!”

Dr. Julie’s geographical trajectory is as balanced as her outlook. She grew up in Alabama, where she studied biology, for her brain, and English, for her heart. After graduating from the University of

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vision with her goals for the practice, which she ticks off on her fingers in an even number four.

There it is again: the brain doing the budgeting; the heart providing care."

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Alabama and practicing dentistry in-state for four years, she applied for residency at a school that, metaphorically, was on the other side of the world: NYU. She was accepted into their Lutheran Medical Center Advanced Education in Pediatric Dentistry program in— wait for it—Hawaii.

She and her husband Dr. Reid Spivey, who owns Anchor Dental in Denver, found the middle of the pendulum in Lake Norman. “We struggled to leave Hawaii because we fell in love with the lifestyle, the weather and landscape, and the Aloha spirit there, but we wanted to be closer to our families in Alabama. The sense of community in Denver and around Lake Norman, the relaxed lifestyle, and

SEPTEMBER 2019

weekends spent on the water have really been a welcome respite from our busy day-to-day lives.”

When she says busy, she means busy. Dr. Julie has extraordinary goals for Lake Norman Pediatric Dentistry, which has been open for less than a year.

“I define myself as a “type A-B personality,” she says.

“I think the majority of dentists are type A, and the profession requires one to be that way. I have those tendencies, but I’m also a bit free-spirited and laid back, which makes me a good fit for pediatrics.”

Her approach is clearly working, as the practice turned a profit in its first month of operation. But— surprise, surprise—there’s a flip side to that equation.

“I budget extremely

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carefully,” she says, “and I don’t pay myself.

Everything I earn outside of overhead goes back into the business. I still work part-time for another office, providing hospital care in the operating room for patients who have limited access to care.”

There it is again: the brain doing the budgeting; the heart providing care.

Opening her own practice was a must for Dr. Julie.

“I’ve worked for some wonderful dental offices, but as an employee, I didn’t have the freedom to create the environment in which I wanted to practice.

I chose to become a pediatric specialist so that I could build a practice centered around patient families, with a focus on education and prevention.”

She’s moving into that

“One: I want to serve as a hometown dentist for my community. I want parents to feel they can call me any time and chat with me as their child’s healthcare provider, but also as a friend. Two: My goal is for no child to have cavities, ever. I know that might be a pipe dream, but I focus on education and prevention very heavily in my practice.

Just as we rely on teachers to educate our children at school, my hope is that parents can rely on me to educate their children on dental health. Three: I want to have fun every day! If dental treatment can be fun and unintimidating for children, the common lifelong fear of the dentist can be avoided. And four: Having specialized training in treating patients with special health care needs, I want the parents of these patients, who already have many day-to-day challenges, to feel safe, comfortable, and confident bringing their children to me for dental care. We strive to create a relaxed experience specifically geared for each patient’s needs.”

Given that she brings that brain and that heart into her work every day, there can be no doubt that Dr. Julie will reach those goals. w

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women

move ON THE

STARR MILLER

(StarrMiller Interior Design) won the Interior Design Society’s National Designer of the Year (DOTY) award for Whole Home Design.

It was awarded

by Thom Filicia and Carson Kressley in Palm Springs. This is the sixth time Starr has won the DOTY.

After operating an art studio in Huntersville for over 15 years, internationallyknown artist

DONNA DOWNEY

has now opened Donna Downey Studios in Lincolnton.

Located on 23 secluded acres, this idyllic setting has become an escape for many artists seeking to grow and fulfill their potential.

Davidson author

SHARON REED recently

received an Independent Publisher’s Award for her book Walking the Heart Path. Sharon is the founder of Heart

By Design consulting and is a certified Gallup organization coach and evangelist for StrengthsFinder. She is founder of the Global Girls Project and was a Global Community Champion with the United Nations’ Empower Women Team.

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MEREDITH HILL, VANESSA MCGOVERN and JENNIFER COCHRANE have

created one of the fastest growing and highest rated travel host agencies in the Carolinas and the country, Gifted Travel Network. They lead an all-female team and are innovating travel education and putting travel agents back on the radar of the traveling public.

DR. JAMIE LAITY is

pleased to announce that Harbor Point Animal Hospital (HPAH) in Mooresville expanded their hours from 8:00 am to 8:00 pm, 7 days a week, in order to provide urgent care. HPAH achieved Fear Free CertiďŹ cation and also earned the prestigious American Animal Hospital Association accreditation.

CONNECT WITH US!

Whether you are a woman on the move, looking for events, new businesses in the area, or are willing to contribute your opinion, follow us by visiting www.facebook.com/lakenormanwoman or e-mail leslie@lakenormanwoman.com.

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WITH LKN

Be SCENE with the staff of Lake Norman Woman or the magazine we create!

Patti Alvarez of Good Soul Hot Yoga celebrates her business with a ribbon cutting.

LKNW's Art Director, Chelsea Bren, with her camera and August issue in hand, ready to photograph owner Patti Alvarez of Good Soul Hot Yoga.

Stephanie and owner of Great Design 4 U, Anna Stowe, lunching in style!

Publisher Dana with Heather Acton, owner of Deep Creek Winery in Bryson City

Long-time LKNW clients and friends, Drs. Matthew and Megan Lineberger of Lineberger Orthodontics, at a charity event in May—and congratulations to the Linebergers on their new arrival!

cheese!

Send or tag us in a photo of you with an issue of LKNW & see it here!

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LKNW’s Tammi Phronebarger (far left) and Kim Cross (far right) with co-owners of Bellies & Babies Sara D’Amico and Christine Latrone

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what i know now!

FEATU R E

Toby Keith may lament he’s not “as good as I once was,”and John Cougar Mellencamp may want to “hold on to 16,” or at least that’s what they say in their songs, but the women of Lake Norman are proof that life just keeps getting better and better. With life experience comes wisdom, and we’re asking area women to share what they’ve learned on the topics of lifestyle, attitude, beauty, self-confidence, relationships, and, yes, getting older.

WHAT’S THE ONE SKILL EVERY WOMAN SHOULD HAVE? She should learn the skills or get

help in making a budget, living within her means, saving, and investing.

WHAT ADVICE WOULD YOU GIVE THE YOUNGER YOU? Dream big, always be a learner,

and take action now on the baby steps to get there.

Read about, follow, and spend time with the VERY BEST people who will believe along with you, challenge, and push you.

HOW DO YOU KNOW WHEN IT’S TIME TO WALK AWAY? It’s time for me to leave when

people or situations are always in high drama, continually sucking the life and energy out of others and their surroundings.

WHAT DID YOU LEARN FROM YOUR MOM?

Her daily habit of early morning coffee, Bible reading, and prayer. She is still going strong at age 97!

WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU HOPE YOUR CHILDREN LEARN FROM YOU?

I hope they know what I am trying to practice now: I cannot change other people, only myself.

In loving and respecting myself, I am better able to love and respect my children and others.

AGE:

MEE T:

Gwynn LINDLER 40

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OCCUPATION & TITLE: Certified

Personal Trainer and Owner of LKN Fit Life, LLC

LKN TOWN:

Cornelius

WHAT ADVENTURE CHANGED YOUR LIFE?

Periodically, I do a Wheel of Wealth personal evaluation, and guess what I’m low on? Adventure!

This year I want to go on a long girlfriend trip with a college roommate or a sister. I’m planning to take solo day hikes and weekend tent camping trips.

WHAT IS SOMETHING YOU WISH YOU WOULD HAVE DONE DIFFERENTLY WHEN YOU WERE 25? If I could do it again, I would

stop “should-ing” on myself and live more of “YES, WHY NOT?” w WRITER DANA NIETERS

PHOTOGRAPHER DEBORAH YOUNG STUDIO

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self

plan like a pro:

TIPS FOR PLANNING YOUR NEXT EVENT

PLANNING AN EVENT CAN BE AN INCREDIBLY STRESSFUL task for anyone, even

experienced event planners. There never seems to be enough hours in the day, and something always goes wrong … it’s inevitable. Whether you are planning a networking, company, fundraising, vendor event, or tradeshow, you want your attendees to have a great and memorable experience. Below is a list of helpful planning tips to assist you in pulling off a successful event!

CHOOSE A RELIABLE VENUE The location of your event can make or break your stress level. You want a venue that’s safe, trustworthy, and easy to deal with — not to mention ADA compliant (Americans with Disabilities Act). Venues that provide things like seating, catering, and lighting take the burden off your own to-do list. But what about Wi-Fi? Onsite IT? Any other technology perks a prospective venue provides will only simplify your planning.

tip t ti ip

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LET PARTICIPANTS SPREAD THE WORD FOR YOU Everyone has social media these days, and the beauty of social media is that it does your marketing for you! Create posts on social media platforms that use each platform as it was designed.

For example, use Facebook for creative videos, Instagram for beautifullystaged photos, and Twitter for quick updates. Create a hashtag to use across all of these platforms and encourage participants to share your posts.

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Christine Patterson works with the Town of Mooresville as the director of the Charles Mack Citizen Center & Performing Arts Center. She can be reached at 704.662.3345 or via their website at www.cmccmooresville.com.

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OFFER LOCAL PARTNERS INCENTIVES TO PROMOTE YOUR EVENT Send press releases to the relevant media outlets as this will help generate news buzz. You could also look at getting media involved as partners. They get exposure at your event in return for advertising. Approach local businesses to propose tradeouts for goods or services for your event. Encourage these businesses to promote your event to their customers as well.

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ASK FOR FEEDBACK Your attendees are the best source of inspiration, ideas, and a tool for measuring success. Their feedback is the best free advice you can get! Even if your event was a success, there is always room for improvement. Take this information and use it to enhance your next event.

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2

STICK TO A BUDGET Develop a financing plan for your event, create a budget and then stick to it. Most organization events are funded by sponsorships, ticket sales, and/or an internal marketing budget. It’s a good idea to add an additional 5-25% as a safety fund.

For events where sponsors are involved, save money through “inkind” sponsor donations.

Events tend to cost more than people estimate, especially in regard to food and beverage.

Make a comprehensive list of all the expenses and then highlight areas where you think sponsors can play a role to offer something “in-kind.”

By following these guidelines, you can hopefully have a less stressful and more efficient (and economical!) event planning experience. Remember, every event is different, and success is in the details. Good luck! w

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FEATU R E

that's what

tha 's what he said that

Said

Where did you grow up? When and how did you meet your wife? Tell us about your family. I am a homegrown North Carolinian, born and raised in Salisbury. My wife, Rachel, grew up in Lexington. However, we didn’t meet until she crashed my 26th birthday party. We began dating a few years later when a couple of days after I had quit smoking I ran into her at a bar and she overheard that I was quitting. She said that if I made it to a month she would take me out to dinner. I’ve been smoke-free for almost eight years now! Rachel and I welcomed our daughter, Vivienne Leigh, on June 18 last year.

She’s at such a great age right now because she is experiencing so many firsts. It’s so much fun to watch her grow and discover new things!

What was the impetus behind Cain Center for the Arts? In so many ways the arts are thriving in LKN. We want to be a home for the arts and increase accessibility. There are roughly 300,000 residents in the four-county region, but for many, the distance and headache of traveling to Charlotte is a genuine barrier. The center will be life-changing for our communities here in Lake Norman. Not only will it help to spark an economic renaissance for downtown Cornelius, it will truly be a cultural centerpiece for us all.

JUSTIN DIONNE SPOILER ALERT: Men and women are different. Ok,

so maybe that fact didn’t really surprise you. After all, it’s been 27 years since John Gray popularized the idea that men are from Mars and women are from Venus. And as much as we love sharing women’s stories, we decided it was time to lend the Martians of LKN our ear, too. This month we share the perspective of Justin Dionne, executive director of Cain Center for the Arts, on life in Lake Norman.

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What kinds of events and performances will be held at Cain Center for the Arts? The facility will consist of a 400seat theater, gallery space, classrooms, meeting rooms, and a two-story lobby. It is being designed to host everything from touring musicians, exhibits, and performances to local companies and community events. Imagine what it will be like to come here and see a national touring musician one week, the Charlotte Symphony the next week, and a performance from a local troupe the next. While all that is happening, there will be art exhibits by local students in the gallery and dance and painting classes underway in the classrooms. We plan to host wedding and baby showers, fundraising events, and more!

What is your biggest challenge right now? Raising $25 million. It’s a big goal, but as of June, we secured just shy of $15 million, so we are well on our way! Anyone interested in contributing can visit cainarts.org for more information on how to pledge. We have a Founders Society established for people who pledge before we break ground. Also, we would love for folks to get involved—not only through volunteering but by helping us to spread the word about this project! w WRITER DANA NIETERS

PHOTOGRAPHER CHELSEA BREN

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SPECIAL PET SECTION

SHOWER THEM WITH THE LOVE THEY DESERVE WITH THE HELP OF L AKE NORMAN’S FINEST

y l i m a f e r a y the the

ever

cutest LK

PET

N

Chloe,

FUR BABY OF KAYLA WILLIAMS

THE CUTEST EVER LKN PET

WINNER!

1.2K This summer, LKNW LIKES launched a contest to find the cutest pet in Lake Norman. The response was amazing, and with over 76 incredibly cute contestants, it was not at all easy to decide on a favorite. But there could only be one winning photo, and Chloe brought in the most votes (a whopping 1.2k likes) by far! Congratulations to the newly crowned “Cutest Pet in LKN” and her pet parent, Kayla Williams, too!

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SPECIAL PET SECTION

keep your pet

love

is a four-legged word

healthy

An important way to show your pet just how much you mean to them is by providing them with proper and routine healthcare. Just like with human health, prevention is the key to treating a multitude of conditions that can affect our dogs and cats. By scheduling an annual well check for your cat or dog, you can work with your veterinarian to keep your pet in tip-top shape. With strong roots in the Mooresville community, MOORESVILLE ANIMAL HOSPITAL’S facility offers state-of-the-art treatments and diagnostics. With specialists in veterinary acupuncture, geriatric care, and internal medicine, the clinic offers both a team of highly skilled veterinarians and a wide range of services that include preventative care, urgent care, laser therapy, dental radiography, in-house lab work, boarding and grooming, and a fully stocked pharmacy. THE VETERINARY HOSPITAL OF DAVIDSON specializes in holistic medicine and natural therapies for your pet. These therapies include pet acupuncture, herbal and glandular medicine, holistic nutritional therapy, homeopathy, laser therapy, chiropractic,

© Elena Gonzalez | Dreamstime.com

, they are our best pets are not just animals family. s, a treasured part of the ye d an s, nte da fi con r ou friends, alty and love, so th their unconditional loy wi s art he r ou al ste ey Th members they treat them like the family it’s actually fairly easy to ms fair they bring to us, it only see truly are. After all the joy e family ch they mean to the entir to show our pets how mu some best in return. Here are by giving them our very ive. furry family members thr tips on making sure our

FO R MO ST OF US ,

massage, and more.

The Veterinary Hospital of Davidson staff often integrates these natural therapies with traditional medicine and surgery to minimize side effects and achieve the best and longest lasting results. The veterinarians and staff at the ANIMAL HOSPITAL OF CORNELIUS understand the special role your pet plays in your family and works hard to provide high-quality care

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to keep them healthy and happy for their entire lives.

In addition to traditional pet care, the practice offers holistic treatments such as acupuncture and laser therapy. In addition, its veterinarians are very active in the community, serving as the veterinary health providers at the local Cornelius Animal Shelter and for the Cornelius Police Department Canine Unit.

provide

rewards & treats

After a trip to see the veterinarian, your pet will be ready for a reward. And because dogs are a social species just like humans, we both can benefit from the social aspect that displaying love and affection through the sharing of yummy treats provides. On the YAPPY HOUR BAKERY FOOD TRUCK, you will find treats and products that are as unique and fun as our tailwaggin’ friends. The handmade gourmet dog biscuits and frozen treats are free of preservatives and available in a variety of shapes, sizes and flavors.

Check out Yappy Hour's event schedule on its website to find out where it will be visiting pet-friendly facilities or making deliveries next.

be d e r a p e r p Despite our best efforts, though, sometimes our pets get sick or hurt. DENVER ANIMAL EMERGENCY is aware that many pets get sick or injured while all other surrounding animal hospitals are closed, and that early detection and medical attention can be key to saving a pet’s life. Offering state of the art, compassionate care for challenging conditions, the highly skilled team of veterinarians at Denver Animal Emergency are there for you and your pet when you need help the most. w

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SPECIAL PET SECTION

JUST WAIT A doggone minute!

Teaching your children to interact safely with dogs

KIDS AND DOGS GO TOGETHER LIKE peanut butter and jelly, but did you know that nearly 80 percent of dog bites come from a family or friend’s dog? While this is somewhat disturbing news, it also means that we have a role to play in how our furbabies and kids interact so that we can become one big happy and SAFE family! Here are a few Dog House Rules to teach, reinforce, encourage, and remember for all of us of the two-legged variety:

Ask permission to pet strange dogs and then when

approaching, teach your children to offer an open palm a couple of inches away from their own body, allowing the pooch to approach and sniff. Then they can pet under the chin so the dog can see their hand. Reaching out abruptly to pet a dog startles them and they can become defensive.

Play fetch with two balls until both child and dog

understand the rules. That way, the child is not coming near the dog’s mouth, especially in an attempt to gain what the dog perceives as HIS! Think like a dog—ask your child if they would want to

be bothered, poked, or prodded while eating or sleeping?

Don’t leave dogs and children together unattended and do not let them crawl on the floor together. Being face-toface and on the same level can put a dog in defense mode.

Never let a child hit, throw toys at, sit on, or shout

at a dog—even hugging is not recommended until the child can interact in a way that the dog knows it is safe.

What humans see as simple gestures, such as hugging or running in an attempt to play, can be seen as aggressive or startling to the dog.

Don’t let your child take food from a dog or offer to

feed it his/her food…dogs are VERY territorial, especially when it comes to food! Same goes for letting your dog and child sleep side-by-side in a bed or otherwise lounging on the sofa; again, a dog can become startled in its sleep and go into attack mode.

Smile and be aware not scared. Believe it or

not, dogs perceive smiles and the energy behind them, so as long as you are smiling and calm, it is hard for the dog to get a frightened vibe from you. w

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For more information on kids and pets and keeping things safe and copasetic, visit www.thefamilydog.com.

SPECIAL PET SECTION

The Cat’s Out of the Bag! 6 TIPS FOR ADOPTING CATS

IF YOU’RE THINKING ABOUT ADOPTING a kitten or adult cat, you may want to consider

getting two. Cats require social interaction, lots of exercise, and mental stimulation—so it is helpful for cats to have each other for these important feline activities. Cats are therapeutic for humans and they have been known to reach their early 20s so life expectancy is good, especially for indoor cats. Here are some other things to consider if you’re adopting a furbaby: THE SHELTER. Visiting the shelters should be a family affair.

And be sure to speak with the adoption counselor for advice on introducing the new cats to any other pets at home.

PERSONALITY. Cats may seem aloof but they have strong personalities, so it is important to make sure they mesh with the family. “In general, cats with long hair and round heads and bodies are more easygoing than lean cats with narrow heads and short hair, who are typically more active,” advises www.americanhumane.org.

THE VET. Go ahead and schedule an appointment for a few days after you bring your kitties home. Give them a few days to adjust before getting their adoption followup examination.

For more information on pet adoption, visit www.americanhumane.org or these area organizations:

COST. There are always costs involved in adoption but the local rescue shelters are a bargain! Many facilities spay/ neuter the animal(s), provide initial vaccines, and some even insert a microchip for permanent identification.

Lake Norman Humane 704.663.3330 www.lakenormanhumane.org Piedmont Animal Rescue 704.360.4262 www.piedmontanimalrescue.com

SUPPLIES. You will need a litter box, cat litter, food and water bowls, food, scratching posts, toys, a bed, a brush, and nail clippers.

Cornelius Animal Shelter 704.237.3602 www.cornelius.org

HOME. It can take several weeks for a cat to relax in a new environment, so in the beginning you may want to consider putting the cat(s) in a room by themselves (with a litter box, food and water, toys, and the cat carrier left out and open with bedding inside) until they are used to their new surroundings; this is particularly important if you have other pets and/or small children. w

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FRENCH BULLDOG: You like the energy of the city but can fit in anywhere. You enjoy making the people close to you feel loved with small gestures of kindness.

CHIHUAHUA: You love being the center of attention.

You are resilient and kind but fierce when required.

DACHSHUND: You’re a foodie! You enjoy the social aspects and gatherings associated with food but equally content to order pizza on a rainy day.

8 THINGS YOUR

FAVORITE DOG BREED

says about you

GERMAN SHEPHERD: You have no problem with authority but you’re not a pushover.

You appreciate the little things.

HUSKY: You might be called “verbose” by some, but certainly you are vocal.

You don’t fret small stuff like being hung up on tidiness… what’s a little mess!?

LABRADOR RETRIEVER: People like you by default. You know what you like and you’re cool with who you are.

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BEAGLE: You are a curious person and want to find answers NOW! You’re so good at it, folks come to you for information, and you are glad to oblige.

PITBULL: You’re confident and opinionated which may turn some folks off at first but you have a big heart; honesty and loyalty are your strong suits.

Information gathered from https://inspiration.allwomenstalk.com.

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Words are magic. They actually change

WORDS

our brain chemistry! As wordsmiths here at LKNW, we are especially fond of words

matter

that will resonate with our readers, in hopes they will help guide & inspire you:

“family is a circle of

STRENGTH …

"

founded on faith, joined in love,

kept by

God.

– A N ATO L E F R A N C E

“

– M A H AT M A G A N D H I

-AUTHOR UNKNOWN

– E V E R YO N E O N FA C E B O O K !

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;)

" "

– N AT H A N I E L B R A N D E N

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self

BETTER ME … BETTER YOU … BETTER WORLD

MIND body SPIRIT

By mixing the ingredients of attitude and action, we can change the flavor of our own lives. Learn to nurture your body and soul to lead a more balanced life.

THE ART OF

Here are 9 tips to cultivate the art of mindful listening:

LISTENING

1. Give the person your undivided attention by putting aside your own concerns and worries along with your cell phone.

mindful 9 TIPS YOU CAN START TODAY!

2. Notice the automatic thoughts arising in your mind bringing your attention back again and again to simply listening.

HEARING IS ONE OF OUR

3. Stay open to the person’s perspective and recognize your judgements as they surface.

natural senses while listening requires focus and attention.

To stay present and truly hear what another person is communicating takes practice.

As our minds wander, we become distracted by our internal narratives. Our attention becomes fragmented as we often think about what we want to say. Our emotions can also interfere with our ability to listen. As a result, we may miss the core messages of our spouses, children, close friends, and colleagues.

4. Employ all of your senses and concentrate on what is being communicated.

5. Notice the person’s facial expressions, gestures, and tone of voice to discern more information of the message being disclosed.

6. Pay attention without getting defensive and without interruption.

7. Be curious and ask questions to deepen the conversation.

The Buddhist monk, author, and peace activist, Thich Nhat Hanh has said, “When you love someone, the best thing you can offer is your presence. How can you love if you are not there?”

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8. Paraphrase what you’ve heard to make sure you have understood.

9. Look lovingly into their eyes with kindness and an open heart.

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When someone truly listens to us, it is emotionally powerful.

Their presence touches something very deep in us; our profound human longing to feel accepted, to be loved, to be valued and respected. To be genuinely heard is to be validated. It bonds people together by building trust.

Several years ago, I heard an NPR special on a purpose-driven life. The host opened the phone lines for people to call in and describe their life’s purpose. It was remarkable to hear some people’s determination and drive to accomplish grand plans in their lives.

But the caller that I will never forget was an older man who said his life purpose was to love the person in front of him.

He elaborated by saying,

“Not only my family and friends but also the woman who takes my dry cleaning, the teenager who packs my groceries, the barber who cuts my hair. I try to open my heart and be present for everyone who crosses my path.”

The gift of one’s presence enhances our relationships through connectedness that is a result of mindful listening. The practice of presence starts from within but the benefits extend far beyond ourselves. I love this quote by Sue Monk Kidd: “There are so many wonderful gifts I can give those I love, but the one that lingers when all the others are gone, the one that knits the brightest threads into life, is the gift of my presence.” w

Mimi Sherman is a credentialed Mindfulness Meditation Instructor through the Society of Holistic Therapists and Coaches and is a member of the International Association of Meditation Instructors. You may reach her via her website at www.breathe-mindfulness.com.

WRITER MIMI SHERMAN

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Hair game fashion Game Shoe Game Smi e Game Don’t forget the most important part... come see us to get your smile game for school!

LOCATIONS:

LinebergerOrthodontics.com #SmileOn

@LinebergerOrtho

ELIZABETH HUNTERSVILLE MOORESVILLE