June 2014 laughs and lifts by Roger Parrish

Take One Home and Please Patronize the Sponsors.

JUNE 2014 Issue 71

JUNE 2014 NOW IN OUR 6�� YEAR

Laughs

andLifts.com

A SIMPLE WAY FOR HAPPY LIVING… FORGET 2 things in life :- 1. The GOOD you do for others… 2. The BAD done by others to you…

Call me today to discuss your options. Some people think Allstate only protects your car. Truth is, Allstate can also protect your home or apartment, your boat, motorcycle - even your retirement and your life. And the more of your world you put in Good Hands®, the more you can save.

Mark Goodson (334) 347-3333 804 Bollweevil Circle Enterprise, Alabama a049146@allstate.

Putting our community in Good Hands® for over 30 years. Insurance subject to terms, qualifications and availability. Allstate Property and Casualty Insurance Company, Allstate Fire and Casualty Insurance Company, Allstate Insurance Company, Allstate Vehicle and Property Insurance Company. Life insurance and annuities issued by Lincoln Benefit Life Company, Lincoln, NE, Allstate Life Insurance Company,Northbrook, IL, and American Heritage Life Insurance Company, Jacksonville, FL. In New York, Allstate Life Insurance Company of New York, Hauppauge, NY. Northbrook, IL. © 2010 Allstate Insurance Company.

The Logic of Marriage A Child's View Jack, a very young lad aged 4

NOW

Open ½ Day on Saturdays 774-8051

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Wash, Wax & Detail Shop On The Premise Laughs andLifts.com 2

JUNE 2014 NOW IN OUR 6�� YEAR

years, says to his father, “Daddy, Daddy, I want to get married.” His father explains, “For that Jack, you have to have a boy and a girl.” So Jack answers, “I've already found a girl.” “Who?” splutters his Dad. “Grandma,” continues Jack happily. “Now, let me get this straight,” his father says. “You want to marry my mother? You can't do that.” “I don't see why not?” Jack responds, “You married mine!”

Without a rich heart, wealth is an ugly beggar. Ralph Waldo Emerson

Dear human, You get mad at me if I wake you, you get mad at me if I don’t. Sincerely, confused alarm clock.

VOTE June 3rd

FARMER TOMMY

DALE COUNTY COMMISSIONER

DISTRICT 1

A Dale County Citizen, Not a Politician!!!

Dear Friends, Please go to the polls on June 3rd and cast your vote for Tommy Farmer, District 1 County Commissioner. It has been a pleasure meeting the people of Dale County District 1 and making new friendships. I pledge to work hard for you and serve you, the people of Dale County. At this time I want to thank you for your vote and support throughout my campaign. Thank you, HomePhone: 774-0714 Cell: 237:1571

PAID POL. AD BY TOMMY FARMER, 1389 JERNIGAN RD. OZARK, AL. 36360

MILITARY ITEMS AND COLLECTABLE GUNS

774-4427 If you really want to get better at golf, go back and take it up at a much earlier age.

JUNE 2014 NOW IN OUR 6�� YEAR

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Dear Girls, Dressing Immodestly Is Like Rolling Around in Manure. Yes You’ll Get Attention, But Mostly From Pigs. Sincerely Real Men.

The SPA at Deer Run

GRAND OPENING June 1 - 30th hair

massage

nails

ENOUGH “I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright. I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun more. I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive. I wish you enough pain so that the smallest joys in life appear much bigger I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting. I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess. I wish you enough hellos to get you through the final good-bye.”

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JUNE 2014 NOW IN OUR 6�� YEAR

“With all thy getting get understanding” Proverbs 4:7

The most useful asset of a person is not a head full of knowledge but a heart full of love, with ears open to listen, and hands willing to help.

50 Things Money Can’t Buy 1. Respect 2. Well-adjusted kids 3. Work-life balance 4. Natural beauty 5. Manners 6. Common sense 7. A clear conscience 8. Purpose in life 9. Integrity 10. Good friends 11. A long life 12. Close-knit family 13. An open mind 14. A worry-free day 15. Trust 16. A new beginning 17. Clean arteries 18. A great idea 19. An honest politician 20. Peace of mind

21. A good hair day 22. Patience 23. Luck 24. A good epitaph 25. Happy memories 26. Time to relax 27. A strong work ethic 28. A positive attitude 29. A happy home 30. Everything you may want 31. Good karma 32. Appreciation of the simple things 33. True love 34. A new shot at a missed opportunity 35. Peace in the world

36. A golden anniversary 37. Talent 38. A second chance in life 39. Quality time with your kids 40. Wisdom 41. Happiness 42. Humility 43. A good reputation 44. 25-hour day 45. Relationship with your kids 46. Youth 47. Class 48. Justice 49. A proper perspective 50. Selflessness

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Rlavender320@gmail.com

JUNE 2014 NOW IN OUR 6�� YEAR

Laughs

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Prada underwear sells for $125, but the actual cost of the underwear is about $5.00.

FOR ALL YOUR HOME MEDICAL EQUIPMENT NEEDS… HOME HEALTH CARE SUPPLY E FRE ERY V I DEL

HOME MEDICAL EQUIPMENT & RESPIRATORY CARE NEEDS RENTALS, SALES, AND REPAIRS

Yes, we can provide electric wheelchairs to Medicaid patients.

774.7535 1.800.835.2266 YOU LIVE IN THE DEEP SOUTH WHEN

Aabon Home Health Care Supply 136 E. Reynolds St. Ozark, AL. aabon@troycable.net

Here’s to all the kids who never find their name on anything in souvenir stores.

1. You get a movie and bait in the same store. 2. "Ya'll" is singular and "all ya'll" is plural. 3. After fifteen years you still hear, "You ain't from 'round here, are ya?" 4. "He needed killin'" is a valid defense. 5. Everyone has 2 first names.

Laughs andLifts.com 6

“Where Business Begins & Industry Grows.” Call 334-774-4952 • E-mail: info@odedc.com 3269 Hwy 231 S. Ozark, AL 36360

JUNE 2014 NOW IN OUR 6�� YEAR

Beware of the lollipop of mediocrity. Lick it once & you’ll suck forever.

They say it takes a minute to find a special person. An hour to appreciate them. A day to love them. And an entire life to forget them.

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Making dreams Come True In The Wiregrass For Over 10 Years.

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IT MIGHT HAVE BEEN Many are saddened by the four words “It might have been.” It is always true that something else might have been, but what should not be forgotten is that virtually all of what eventually was wouldn’t have been either. The trade is seldom one that a wise person would make.

Rlavender320@gmail.com

“Tell me and I forget. Teach me and I remember. Involve me and I learn.” Benjamin Franklin

Logan’s All Pro Tint • Tire & Accessories

When in doubt, mumble.

AND WE DO VEHICLE LETTERING

Auto Repair Facility

171 North Union Ave. Ozark, Alabama

334-774-0059 JUNE 2014 NOW IN OUR 6�� YEAR

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Time is the best teacher. The only problem is, it kills all of its students

SERVING BREAKFAST

LUNCH and DINNER

NEXT DOOR TO THE KANGAROO ON 231 S. 4074 Hwy 231 S. Ozark , AL 334-445-3655

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HAMBURGER STEAK, FISH, PORK CHOP or COUNTRY FRIED STEAK

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“FAMILY PACK”

FOUR

Bacon Double Cheeseburger Platter

CAN DINE FOR

SUMMER HORSE CAMP 2014 Youth & Adult

Beginner thru Advanced

Judy Alldredge, Riding Instructor Time 8:30 - 3:30 Ph: 334-445-1847 Cell: 334-790-8990 ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ●

Students will learn Basic Horse Care Horse Behavior Stall Management Horse Tack & Equipment English, Western or Gaited …and Much More

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Cost 3 day camp $185 4 day camp $250 Per Day Price $65 Camp Dates May 27-30 (4 day) June 3-6

(4 day)

June 9-11 (3 day) June 17-19 (3 day) June 24-27 (4 day)

Children must be at least 6 years of age Horse assignment will be determined on size, age & experience Advanced reservations required No more than 6 students per class Must pay in advance: Students will need to bring snacks, lunch, Water and extra clothing or swimsuit for bathing animals. A non-refundable $50 is due before the camp to hold the spot.

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JUNE 2014 NOW IN OUR 6�� YEAR

I used to be addicted to lunch meat. I quit cold turkey.

DALE COUNTY RESCUE MISSION OZARK

Go Ye…...

Dale County Rescue Mission has provided Ministry to Women in need for over 20-Years and we will continue to do so in the future. Due to some very disappointing decisions made by the Representatives of the City of Ozark, we are unable to open a house which would have been able to provide a Women’s Ministry Cen ter. Now our costs for providing Ministry to Women will be substantially

higher than otherwise would have been the case. With that said, we are in need of financial support to cover the substantial rising costs of providing Ministry to meet the Women’s Caption describing picture or graphic. needs. We need your help and donation in order for us to continue providing Ministry to Women in need. All donations are IRS taxdeductible and can be sent To: Dale County Rescue Mission PO Box 1153 Ozark, AL 36361

Your kind and gracious financial donation is greatly appreciated and will assuredly help us to meet the needs of keeping this Ministry for Women alive and ongoing; and making our community a better place.

WE NEED YOUR HELP!

2013 U.S Census Bureau Statistics for the State of Alabama · 4, 8333,722 Population · 18.1% Homeless or living in Poverty · 16% of these reside in Dale County

Daily Assistance Costs Motel (per night)

$40

Food (per day)

$15

Clothes

$20

Bus Fare

TBD

Total excludes Bus Fare

$75

Dale County Rescue Mission Ozark Donation/Pledge Request

JUNE 2014 Laughs Secure online donations are now available at our website: www.dcrmozark.org NOW IN OUR 6�� YEAR andLifts.com

He said: What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you? ... She said: Turn sideways and look in the mirror. 5-QUART EVERYDAY OIL VALUE CHANGE PRICE 4-TIRE ROTATION 27-POINT Or less VEHICLE

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EVERYDAY 30-DAY TIRE PRICE MATCH GUARANTEE January 1 - December 31�� 2014 To qualify for the price match guarantee, the tire must be the exact same brand and line as GM’s eligible tire brands.

1801 US Hwy. 231 South, Ozark

A man noticed he was being tailgated by a stressed-out woman on a busy boulevard. Suddenly, the light turned yellow, just in front of him. Not wanting to let the crazed woman push him, he stopped at the crosswalk, even though he could have beaten the red light by flooring it. The tailgating woman slammed on her brakes, then her horn, screaming in frustration as she missed her chance to get through the intersection with him. As she was still in mid-rant, she heard a tap on her window and looked up into the face of a very serious police officer. The officer ordered her to exit her car with her hands up. He took her to the police station where she was searched, fingerprinted,

Furnished & Unfurnished

305 Newton Avenue Ozark, AL 36360

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JUNE 2014 NOW IN OUR 6�� YEAR

Gossip is a disease spread from mouth to mouth.

On wall in ladies room: "My husband follows me everywhere." .. Written just below it:"I do not!"

photographed, and placed in a cell. After a couple of hours, the jailer approached the cell and opened the door. She was escorted back to the booking desk where the arresting officer was waiting with her personal effects. "I'm sorry for this mistake," he says. "You see, I pulled up behind your car while you were blowing your horn, flipping the guy off in front of you, and cussing a blue streak at him. I noticed the 'Choose Life' license plate holder, the 'What Would Jesus Do' bumper sticker, the 'Follow Me to Sunday School' bumper sticker, and the chrome-plated Christian fish emblem on the trunk." "Yeah, so?" she says. "Naturally," he concluded, "I assumed you had stolen the car."

Expert Auto Body Repair at Reasonable Rates All Insurance Companies Accepted Logan Webb Shop: 334-774-2886 Fax: 334-774-2891 OzarkCollisionCenter.com 493 S. Union Ave. Ozark, AL 36360 OzarkCollisionCenter@gmail.com

Tournament Weather Our pastor, an avid golfer, was once taking part in a

local tournament. As he was preparing to tee off, the organizer of the tournament approached him and pointed to the dark, threatening storm clouds which were gathering. "Preacher," the organizer said, "I trust you'll see to it that the weather won't turn bad on us." Our pastor shook his head. "Sorry," he replied. "I'm sales, not management!

482 S. Union Ave. OZARK 774-9345 5200 Boll Weevil Cir. ENTERPRISE 393-0503 270 Ross Clark Cir. DOTHAN 794-8521 2606 Ross Clark Cir, DOTHAN 792-1195 177 Hwy. 231 N. TROY 566-3413

Children are often spoiled, because no one will spank Grandma.

JUNE 2014 NOW IN OUR 6ďż˝ďż˝ YEAR

Laughs

andLifts.com

Not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful blessing.

NUT CAKES Hazelnut Spiced Cake

Vermont Maple-Pecan Cake

Ingredients

1 cup sugar 1 tablespoon icing sugar 1 teaspoon baking powder 1/2 cup cranberries 1/2 cup hazelnuts 1 cup flour 1/2 cup orange juice 2 tablespoons butter 1 egg 1 pinch salt 1 pinch ground ginger 1 pinch freshly grated nutmeg 4 tablespoons water

3/4 cup plus 1 tablespoon allpurpose flour 1/4 cup sugar 1/4 cup packed brown sugar 1/2 teaspoon baking soda 1/4 teaspoon salt 1/2 cup buttermilk 1/4 cup butter, melted 3 tablespoons maple syrup 1/4 teaspoon vanilla extract 1/3 cup finely chopped pecans, toasted GLAZED PECANS: 3 tablespoons light corn syrup 1/3 cup pecan halves

Directions 1. Sift together the dry ingredients except icing sugar and make a hole in the center. 2. Stir in the orange juice, butter, water and egg. 3. Beat together until all the flour is incorporated. 4. Stir in the cranberries and nuts. 5. Grease and line a 9 x 5 loaf tin. 6. Spoon in the mixture and bake in a preheated oven at 325 degrees for 1 hour until a skewer inserted into the center comes out clean. 7. Remove from tin, peel off the paper and dust with icing sugar. 8. Slice and serve warm or cold with butter or cream cheese.

FROSTING: 1 package (3 ounces) cream cheese, softened 3 tablespoons butter, softened 1 tablespoon plus 1 teaspoon maple syrup 1-1/2 cups confectioners' sugar

Directions In a large bowl, combine the flour, sugars, baking soda and salt. Combine the buttermilk, butter, syrup and vanilla; stir into dry ingredients just until combined. Fold in chopped pecans. Pour into two 6-in. round baking pans coated with cooking spray. Bake at 350° for 20-25 minutes or until a toothpick inserted near the center comes out clean. Cool for 10 minutes before removing from pans to wire racks to cool completely.

Smarter, Bolder, Faster

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SellingOzark.com or Century21.com

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● Hallelujah Acres Products ● Health & Diet Books ● Organic Foods

334-673-2444 1901 Wise Dr., Off Ross Clark Circle, Dothan, AL Always Open Online At www.ShopHealthConcepts.com

Laughs andLifts.com 12

JUNE 2014 NOW IN OUR 6�� YEAR

If you're looking for real estate in the Ozark area, we can help you choose the right property for your needs and will guide you towards making an informed real estate decision in our market. We pride ourselves in being able to give all our clients important local information needed to make informed decisions based on years of living and enjoying all the Ozark area has to offer. If you are a seller, we can help price and put your property on the market for a quick sale.

334-774-4961 800-334-7403

1280 E. Andrews Ave. Ozark, AL RESIDENTIAL • COMMERCIAL LOTS/LAND • MULTI-FAMILY

You might be a redneck if: You've slow danced at a Waffle House!

I think I might be getting over my insomnia, Today my foot fell asleep.

NUT CAKES In a small saucepan, bring corn syrup to a boil. Cook and stir for 1 minute or until slightly thickened. Remove from the heat; stir in pecan halves until coated. Place in a single layer on a foil-lined baking sheet. Bake at 425° for 2-3 minutes or until golden brown. Cool. For frosting, in a small bowl, beat the cream cheese, butter and syrup until smooth. Beat in confectioners' sugar. Place one cake layer on a serving plate; spread with 1/2 cup frosting. Top with second layer; frost top and sides of cake. Garnish with glazed pecans. Store in the refrigerator. Yield: 6 servings.

Southern Praline Pecan Cake

4. Bake at 350 degrees F (175 degrees C) for 50 minutes or until a toothpick comes out clean.

Pistachio Nut Bundt Cake Ingredients 1 (18 1/4 ounce) packages yellow cake mix 2 (3 1/2 ounce) packages instant pistachio pudding mix 1 cup sour cream 1/2 cup vegetable oil 4 eggs 1/2 cup brown sugar, packed 1/2 cup roasted pistachio nut, chopped 1 1/2 teaspoons ground cinnamon 1/4 cup powdered sugar, for dusting

Ingredients:

Directions

1 (18.25 ounce) package butter pecan cake mix 1 (16 ounce) container coconut pecan frosting 4 eggs 3/4 cup vegetable oil 1 cup water 1 cup chopped pecans

Preheat oven to 350°F Grease and flour a 9-inch bundt pan. In a medium bowl, stir together the cake mix and instant pudding. Add the sour cream, oil and eggs, mix well. The batter will be thick. Spoon half of the batter into the prepared pan. Combine the brown sugar, pistachios and cinnamon, sprinkle over the batter in the pan., being careful to keep filling from the edges as it might stick to the pan. Cover with the remaining batter. Bake 1 hour in the preheated oven, until cake springs back when lightly touched. Cool for 15 minutes in pan before inverting onto a wire rack to cool completely. When cake is cooled, dust with powdered sugar.

Directions: 1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Spray a 9 or 10 inch Bundt pan with nonstick cooking spray. 2. Combine the cake mix with the frosting, eggs, oil, water and 1/2 of the pecan pieces. Mix until combined. 3. Sprinkle the remaining 1/2 of pecans in the prepared Bundt pan then pour in the cake batter.

DO YOU HAVE A DISABILITY? ARE YOU DISABLED? HAVE You Considered Applying for YOUR Social Security? Are you confused about the process or have you already

BEEN DENIED YOUR BENEFITS?

WE CAN HELP!

FAITHWORKZ DISABILITY Rose Clark Hallford Has been Representing Clients in Disability Claims FOR MORE THAN 30 YEARS

Sign on lawyers door: Reasonable doubt for a reasonable fee.

FREE CONSULTATION 334-443-3000

406 Ben St. • Suite 100 Near the Ft. Rucker gate

FaithworkzDisability@gmail.com

Ozark, Alabama 36360

JUNE 2014 NOW IN OUR 6�� YEAR

Laughs

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It is the impurities in gemstones which give them their color.

Make Good Impressions An expert on manners preaches the "3 by 20 rule." Here's the rule: The first minute of a first impression has three parts of 20 seconds each: •••"In the first 20 seconds, we're judged by how we look . . . •In the next 20 seconds, by our behavior . . . •In the final 20 seconds, by our words." So in one minute, the other person judges our appearance, our conduct, and our language. Pow! First impressions are set. And you get only one chance to make a first impression. If you know how people form judgments, make it work for you. Be aware of the impressions you make.

Cabinets Designed For Living Imagine our beautiful and functional custom designed cabinets in your home. You’ll love the style and affordability.

Word of Truth Family Church

Ephes. 1:13 VICTORY ~ HEALTH ~PROSPERITY COME FIND OUT WHAT GOD HAS IN STORE FOR YOU TODAY Non-Denominational Church Weekly services Saturday at 5:30 pm. Come join us as we worship our Savior and Examine God’s Word. We are conveniently located just south of Ozark on 231. 5474 S. Hwy. 231, Ozark, Al 36360 Pastor Ed Fitzpatrick

The worst person to be around is someone who complains about everything and appreciates nothing.

MY APOLOGIES

THERE WERE ONLY FIVE FLOWERS

FREE In Home Estimates by Dan Barefield

Cell 334.726.3459 Office 334.774.9579

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JUNE 2014 NOW IN OUR 6�� YEAR

I sincerely apologize for all your agony while trying to find the sixth flower In the May edition. In an effort to be fair to everyone, I will NOT have a winner in the find the flower contest. I will do my best to NOT let this happen in future editions of Laughs and Lifts. Roger Parrish, Editor

If you scatter thorns, don’t go barefoot.

Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?

Dreaming of Stuff that Works By: Jim McClellan outdoorsdownsouth.com

very time there’s a huge Lottery or Powerball jackpot, people talk about what they would do with all that money if they won. Mostly it’s the same old stuff – mansions, vacation homes, yachts, expensive cars and the like. Not me, though. My dreams are much simpler. I have enough stuff. I just want stuff that works like it’s supposed to. I could list two dozen things I own that function just well enough to keep me from taking them to the dump, but not well enough to count on at any given time. Why? I suspect it’s a genetic condition or a curse handed down through the generations. One thing I’m sure of is that I got it from my father. Most kids learn from their dads how to maintain things like cars, boats, lawn mowers, etc. If you grew up with Gene McClellan, however, the most frequent lessons focused on jury-rigging whatever you were using just long enough to get the job done. And if you were using his stuff, that knowledge was incredibly handy. For example, Bill and I were driving his old ’72 Bronco to the camp one day when we heard something dragging the ground. We thought it might be the muffler, but when we looked under the truck we discovered that, nope, it was the gas tank. The metal straps had rusted apartSomewhere and the tank was scraping along the road. We found some rope, tied down there the tank back up to the body and went on our merry way. Bill told Daddy is a well armed catfish! what happened and he said, “Yep, I need to have that fixed.” But two years later, when he traded the Bronco on a new model, I saw the old one at the Chevrolet place downtown. Just for grins, I looked underneath. Sure enough, the same two pieces of rope were still there. Looking under the hood is fine, but you should probably check the gas tank as well. Throughout my childhood, I thought stuff like that was normal. It wasn’t until later that I realized that other folks actually bought quality stuff, took care of it and counted on it to work when they needed it. The very next thing I realized is that quality stuff costs money, which is why Daddy often bought things that were past their prime. Preventive maintenance would be throwing good money after bad. I’d like to say I learned from that experience, but a quick inventory around my house suggests otherwise. I have an ’84 Evinrude that Bill gave me last year. It’s so old that I have to buy parts on the Internet. Ronnie Bridges has all but pronounced it dead, but I keep using it anyway. (Hey, it was free.) My ’98 Ford truck leaks when it rains, uses a quart of oil every thousand miles or so and the third door won’t open. The lights on my trailer work about as well and as often as Congress. And most of my fishing rods are cut six inches shorter because the original tips have been broken off. But I’ll keep patching them up to get as much use out of them as possible. That’s because there was another lesson that Daddy taught me, though maybe not on purpose, that’s just as significant. It’s that things aren’t nearly as important as experiences. Daddy owned a lot of junk, but there are a lot of wealthy people in this world who didn’t have nearly as much fun with a lot nicer boats, trucks and guns. It’s true that money doesn’t buy happiness, so I’m not waiting on wealth to start enjoying life. If I ever do strike it rich, however, you can bet I’ll have stuff that works. I'm Jim McClellan, a native of Calhoun County in Northwest Florida. I grew up hunting, fishing and hanging out in the same Apalachicola River swamp that five generations of my family have enjoyed -and I still do so as much as I can. I also enjoy running, swimming, biking and backpacking. You can read more stories on my blog. www.outdoorsdoorsouth.com

Cliches are a dime a dozen..

JUNE 2014 NOW IN OUR 6�� YEAR

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COMMUNITY PEOPLE QUALITY HEALTHCARE

Dale Medical Center

Health Focus acute withdrawal symptoms from cessation of use of certain substances, in conjunction with other related health issues. The diagnosis of need for inpatient admission can only be made by a le3censed physician.

Dale Medical Center Expands Medical Stabilization Service Dale Medical Center is expanding the hospital’s existing inpatient medical stabilization service for adults. New Vision is an inpatient medial stabilization service for adults with drug, alcohol and related health issues. The service accepts appropriate adults, who are currently using or are experiencing acute withdrawal symptoms from certain drugs. It consists of a medically supervised hospital stay for inpatient stabilization that typically lasts 3 days. The inpatient stay includes the following aspects: ü ü ü ü ü

Pre-Screening Assessment Admission Medical Stabilization Appropriate Discharge Planning

New Vision has a fully qualified treatment team including an attending physician and nursing personnel who utilize a multidisciplinary team approach in the stabilization of the patient. Upon admission to the hospital for medical stabilization, assessment of the patient’s fundamental needs are accomplished. These assessments include a medical history, physical, a complete laboratory workup and a nursing assessment. Patients who are under the influence or chemical substances, and are considered medically unstable, will be closely observed and stabilized. The Hospital accepts appropriate patients who are experiencing incapacitation due to substance use and/or abuse, or are experiencing JUNE 2014 Laughs NOW IN OUR 6�� YEAR andLifts.com

The service accepts most insurance, Medicaid and Medicare plans. For additional information on the New Vision service, contact us at 1-800-939-2273 or 334-443-0210.

Dale Medical Center Goes Wireless Meeting the growing demand from patients and visitors, Dale Medical Center recently began offering free wireless Internet access at various locations throughout the facility, including patient rooms. Wes Hall, Nurse Manager on the Med / Surg floor said he is glad that the hospital’s IT department was able to provide the services to patients and visitors on the floor. “We’ve been getting more and more requests over the last year, so this is going to be very satisfying for our patients,” he said. Jason Jones, IT Supervisor, said the department made it a high priority in recent months to make the hospital a more technology friendly place. “Wireless Internet access is something that people increasingly expect when they go to a facility such as ours,” he said. “We’re just really happy we can do this for our patients.”

Dr. Radu Constantine 126 HOSPITAL AVE • OZARK, AL 36360 126 HOSPITAL AVE • OZARK, AL 36360 334-774-2601 334-774-2601

Call For An Appointment

443-0177

Visit Our Website At Visit Our Website At www.DaleMedical.org www.DaleMedical.org For the latest news & ForHealth the latest news & information Health information

Dale Medical Center

General Surgery & Cosmetics Dale Medical Center

Call For An Appointment

774-0762

JUNE 2014 NOW IN OUR 6�� YEAR

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FREE ONE DOLLAR BILLS! Please send $4.95 for P&H. Limit 1 per order.

C & B FARM & PRODUCE FRESH DAILY Tomatoes, Squash Peas, Butterbeans Watermelons Cantaloupes INTERSECTION OF HWY 84 & 123 S. WICKSBURG, ALABAMA

334-726-3278 OR 334-726-3277

Government Logic The day I immigrated to the United States, I was given an alien ID card that featured a cute photo of me at age 15. Years later, when I went to the courthouse to become a citizen, a clerk confiscated my card. "What will you do with it?" my wife asked. "We burn it" was the answer. "Could you please cut the photo off and let us keep it?" asked my wife. "Certainly not," said the clerk. "This card is official U.S. government property. As such it cannot be mutilated before it's destroyed."

nce there was an Antartian that was down on his luck. In order to get some money he decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. He went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree and told him "I've kidnapped you." The Antartian wrote a note saying "I've kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning put $10,000 in a paper bag and put it beneath the pecan tree next to the slide on the north side of the city playground. Signed, An Antartian." The Antartian then pinned the note to the kid's shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents. The next morning the Antartian checked, and sure enough a paper bag was sitting beneath that pecan tree. The Antartian opened up the bag and found the $10,000 with a note. The note said, "How could one Antartian do this to another Antartian?!"

PARTS & SERVICE 301 N. EAST AVE.

OZARK, AL

334-774-5151 MON-FRI 7 - 5:30

Laughs andLifts.com 18

SAT 7 - NOON

JUNE 2014 NOW IN OUR 6ďż˝ďż˝ YEAR

There are just not enough days in weekends.

A movie critic is like a legless man who teaches running.

Shopping around for car insurance? Auto-Owners Insurance offers broad, flexible protection for your car and you! Choose from a variety of programs designed to fit your needs. We also have many discounts available such as multi-policy, multi-car and good student discount.

Call or visit us today!

ircle Insurance Agency 863 Andrews Ave. Ozark, Al. 36360

Sammy Judah

A psychiatrist is a person who will give you expensive answers that your wife will give you for free!

The worst thing about censorship is shshshshsh

334-774-7177 Donna Shuman

Military Initials When I was a newly commissioned Lieutenant in the Army, I was assigned as a temporary assistant in an administrative office in a Military Intelligence unit. One day a long came around with a cover sheet instructing all assigned officers to read it and initial it as indication of their compliance. I figured it meant me too, so I read and initialed it. However, a few days later, it came back addressed specifically to me. An attached note read:"You are not permanently assigned to this unit and are thus not an authorized signee. Please erase your initials and initial your erasure." So I did.

JUNE 2014 NOW IN OUR 6ďż˝ďż˝ YEAR

Laughs

andLifts.com

Real golfers don’t m ss putts. They get robbed.

Debit Card

WEDDING GOWNS & FORMALS CLEANING AND PRESERVING

By Wallace Kennedy, Jr.

Boots • Belts • Hats • Caps • Gloves • Shoes

COMFORTERS AND QUILTS

he Debit Card is the new norm for spending money; most people are familiar with it and understand how it works. What if someone gave you a “Debit Card” or “Blank Check” with unlimited resources? Most of us having this privilege would certainly start with paying off all our debt. In the natural if this happen to us we would be very excited. Consider the spiritual: Jesus paid a debt that we could not pay. 1 Corinthians 6:20 tells us: For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God's. We all had or have a “sin debt” that cost too much for human efforts nor can be purchase with money. This debt could only be paid with the shading of innocent (sinless) blood of the Son of God. Jesus climbed Calvary’s Hill and paid all our Bills! Be encouraged whoever you are. Jesus death not only redeemed us from the “sin debt” but in fact we do have a “Debit Card” from heaven. Jesus said in John 10:10 that He came to give us eternal life and a life of abundance, living life to the fullest right now. Whatever you need, God has it, and He is waiting to give it to you. Salvation is a free gift from God, grace is God’s unmerited favor. Accept and welcome Christ Jesus into your hearts, make Him Lord over your life and every sin-debt you have ever accumulated will be paid in full instantly.

Laughs andLifts.com 20

JUNE 2014 NOW IN OUR 6�� YEAR

LOGAN’S CLEANERS & LAUNDRY 774-8012

BRING US YOUR SUEDE - LEATHER & FURS Monday-Friday 6 Saturday 6-12

618 S. Union Ave. Ozark, Al.

Logan’s Cleaners Alterations Take it up or Let it out! Buttons, Hems, Zippers, Mending Quality Work at Fair Prices

774-8012

618 S, Union Ave Ozark

DOTHAN NEW & USED TIRES, TIRE BALANCING, OIL CHANGES & BRAKES

334-699-4122

1890 Montgomery Hwy. Dothan, AL 36303

Tim Stafford, Owner

Real golfers don’t miss putts. They get robbed.

Common sense is like deodorant, the people who need it most rarely have it. Squash

Tomatoes

Okra

Cabbage

MILLS PRODUCE Highway 52 West ~ Malvern, AL 36349

334-712-0700 Owners MICHAEL & DAISY MILLS Peas

Potatoes

Florida Citrus

Industrial Lubricants Automotive Lubricants Non Ethanol Gasoline Kerosene Hwy & Off Hwy Diesel martinenergyservices.com

Red Piper Sales Representative red.piper@martinmlp.com

Office: (334) 774-7035 Fax: (334) 774-1446 Cell: (334) 618-1652 2937 N. US Hwy 231 Ozark, AL. 36360

Walter J. Lawrence, M.D. Family Practice & Aviation Medicine ● ● ● ●

Accepting new and transfer patients Full laboratory services collected on site FAA Physicals (Class 1, 2, & 3) Most major insurances accepted

WALTER J. LAWRENCE, M.D., P.C. 442 GLOVER AVENUE ENTERPRISE, AL 36330 334-475-2058 Appointments and Walk-ins Accepted Monday to Friday 8:00am to 5:00pm www.LawrenceMedicine.com

Your marketing plan needs to include the magazine you are reading right now.. Their popularity is undeniable. Give Laughs&Lifts a call today.

334-379-7603

774-7900 NEW LOCATION OPEN TUESDAY - FRIDAY 10 - 4

NEW LOCATION

SALE

50% Off EVERYTHING ON SALE !

The purpose of life is a life of purpose.

JUNE 2014 NOW IN OUR 6�� YEAR

Laughs

andLifts.com

I just saw an Apple store get robbed. The police have detained me as an iwitness.

For A Meal A Treat Or A Party! The area’s only homemade ice cream shop!

NOW IN TROY Laughs and Lifts Family Magazine CALL KEITH 334-403-2790 TO ADVERTISE OR FOR DISTRIBUTION LOCATIONS

Homemade Ice Cream Freshly Baked Waffle Cones Sandwiches & Wraps Soups & Salads Ice Cream Cakes Specialty Cowffees 158 E. Broad St. Ozark 443-0222 1665 Hwy 231 S. Troy 770-1094 113 E. College St Enterprise 348-2202

To See our Menu & Flavors Visit milkymooicecream.com Milky Moo’s Too Candy & Gift Baskets 111 E. College St. Enterprise 475-2128

to a Customer Appreciation Celebration

Jenna Mack, Agent 209 N Highway 231 Ozark, AL 36360

Saturday June 28th from 10am-2pm at the Jenna Mack Agency. We want to show our customers how much we appreciate them! Come join us. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.® GET TO A BETTER STATE ™

CALL ME TODAY!

334-774-2020 jenna@jenna4auto.com 1001014.1

State Farm, Home Office, Bloomington, IL

FIND The 9 DIFFERENCES IN THESE PHOTOS Answers on page 30

Laughs andLifts.com 22

JUNE 2014 NOW IN OUR 6�� YEAR

Remember, there are no mistakes, only lessons

My ultra sensitive toothpaste doesn’t like it when I use other toothpastes.

Sedation Dentistry Sedation Dentistry is a revolutionary way to accomplish your dental treatments without fear or anxiety. You dream…we work. Sedation Dentistry is often used during procedures that require an extensive amount of time in the treatment chair, and sedation is ideal for patients who exhibit dental phobia. Sedation Dentistry offers anxiety-free dental procedures as the patient is in a deeply relaxed state. though fully responsive. It means something even more important, a comfortable experience, so that little is felt or remembered from the dentistry procedure. When you awake, you are well rested, and your smile is healthier and more beautiful.

Dothan Cosmetic Dentistry Advanced Technology

Geoff M. Gaunt, DMD Aesthetic General Dentistry 2431 West Main Street, Dothan, AL 334-673-7440 DothanCosmeticDentistry.com

woman was letting her husband have it with just a touch more venom than usual, saying, "You're an idiot. You have always been an idiot. You'll always be an idiot. If they had an idiot contest, you'd come in second." "Why would I come in second?" "Because you're an idiot!"

My Smart Sister My sister is a know-itall who bristles at anyone’s wellintentioned advice. But when our older sister gave her several clever tips, she was impressed. "I have to hand it to Pat," she told me. "She really is smart. Not Jeopardy smart; more Wheel of Fortune smart."

There is one good Don’t knock the thing about snow. It weather. 90% of the makes your lawn look people couldn’t start a just as good as your conversation if it didn’t change once in a while. neighbors. Chance favors those in motion.

JUNE 2014 NOW IN OUR 6�� YEAR

Laughs

andLifts.com

Although cats are rather delicate creatures, and they are subject to a good many ailments, I never heard of one who suffered from insomnia. THE WILL

A father left 17 camels, as the inheritance for his three sons. When the father passed away, his sons opened up the will. The Will stated that THE ELDEST SON SHOULD GET HALF of 17 camels while THE MIDDLE SON SHOULD BE GIVEN 1/3RD (ONE-THIRD) & THE YOUNGEST SON SHOULD BE GIVEN 1/9TH (ONENINTH) of the 17 camels. As it is not possible to divide 17 into half or 17 by 3 or 17 by 9, the three sons started to quarrel with each other. So, the three sons decided to go to a wise woman. The wise woman listened patiently about the Will. The wise young woman, after giving some thought, brought one camel of her own and added the same to 17. That increased the total to 18 camels. Now, she started reading the deceased father’s will. Half of 18 = 9. So she gave the eldest son 9 camels 1/3rd of 18 = 6. So she gave the middle son 6 camels 1/9th of 18 = 2. So she gave the youngest son 2 camels. Now add this up: 9 plus 6 plus 2 is 17, and this left one camel, which the wise woman took away.

Laughs andLifts.com 24

OLD ICE HOUSE LUNCH BUFFET 11:00 AM - 2:00 PM TUESDAY - FRIDAY AND SUNDAY PRIVATE PARTY ROOM AVAILABLE

140 Jones Street • Ozark, AL www.theoldicehouserestaurant.com TAKE-OUTS & CATERING

Where do you find a Laughs&Lifts are distributed every month in over 300 locations in the Wiregrass Area. Distributed in restaurants, offices, hair salons, auto repair shops, motels, medical and dental waiting rooms, hospitals, grocery stores and other high traffic businesses. Where ever people wait , eat out or shop…it is our goal to have a Laughs&Lifts there for them with entertainment and encouragement strategically placed all around your advertisement to keep the reader on the page for up to 10 times longer for maximum exposure to your ad!

JUNE 2014 NOW IN OUR 6�� YEAR

A flower does not think of competing to the flower next to it. It just blooms.

Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.

Across 1. Devastation

7. Down

6. 1965 march site

9. Mother's

11. Philippine plant

10. Colonial insect

12. Song of praise

14. Fire remnant

13. Painter of faces

16. Boy

15. "Shoot"

17. Rage

16. Giddy

18. Tanqueray

24. Italian song

19. Fedora, for example

25. Poop

8. Luau souvenir

26. Tooth replacement, in a way

20. Afflict

30. Cow comment

22. Amphibian

31. Golf ball filler

23. Deer

39. Neighborhoods

21. "Law and Order" concern

27. Get a load of

40. Upright

28. Cut (off)

41. Annoying little insects

29. Odes

42. Dumbfound Down 1. Chance 2. Blood system

31. Muzzle 32. Ornamental vase 33. Pekoe

Masonic Lodge 349

Saturday June 7th 8:30 Shotgun Start Fox Ridge Golf Course ~ Ozark, Alabama

●4 Man Best Ball Scramble ●$65 per Player or $260 per Team ●Entry Fee Includes Lunch & Registration for door prizes ●Grand Prize: Lowest Team Score $600 2nd Place $300 & 3rd Place $150 ● $5 Mulligans ● $100 Longest Drive & $100 Closest to Pin You can register from now until June 6 by contacting the following: 1. James Ray 334-704-3454 2. Daniel Strickland 334-596-4551 or 3. Jimmy Harris 334-774-1440

"When business is good, it pays to advertise; When business is bad, you've got to advertise."

- Henry Ford (1863-1947) Good Times or Bad, We Are Your Best Advert Value. Call Laughs and Lifts Today.

334-379-7603

Spring & Summer Vegetables

34. Tit for ___ 35. Deteriorate

3. Dictionary abbr.

36. French wine production area

4. Costume mo.

37. Over-actor actor

5. Tiffany's measure

38. Mount Blanc, for one

6. Sudden increase

Ozark

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult?

220 W. Malvern Hwy Malvern, Alabama

334-793-6690 JUNE 2014 NOW IN OUR 6�� YEAR

Laughs

andLifts.com

If anyone ever texts me “who is this” I always respond “Jake from State Farm.”

ASK DR. GAUNT “Your Hometown Dentist”

Hello Readers,

INGRAM MEMORIAL Headstones, Vaults & Any Type of Cemetery Work

Susan Langley, Owner

www.IngramMemorial.com

With this being June, the month in which we honor fathers on the 15th, I'd like to dedicate this space to all fathers, especially my own. He has always been a very special father, and we've always been close. This past year I had the honor of renewing HIS smile! It was a big thrill for me and the whole family to see him want to do that for himself. Maybe the most proud was my stepmother! He is 73- years- young and still runs and rides his bike( the two-wheeled, self-propelled type) long distances with my step-mom and whoever dares to try to keep up with him. So, with his active lifestyle AND his new smile, he could really persuade someone he is 63 if he wanted to! Staying with the Father's Day theme, this month's Did You Know is about George Washington, widely known as the Father of the United States. Next to the Cherry Tree legend, the story that George Washington wore wooden dentures arguably remains the most widespread and enduring myth about Washington's personal life. While he certainly suffered from dental problems and wore multiple sets of dentures, none were made of wood, nor was that a material used by dentists in his era. His dentures were actually made of materials such as ivory, gold, and lead. The legend is supported by the appearance of the ivory when it stained; it had a grainy appearance like wood! Health and Happiness, Geoff Gaunt,DMD dothancosmeticdentistry.com

Laughs andLifts.com 26

JUNE 2014 NOW IN OUR 6�� YEAR

2360 N. Range St. Dothan, AL

334-792-0044 1-800-598-0045

FIND THE BLUEBIRD We have hidden this bluebird in 6 ads in this month’s edition of Laughs&Lifts. TO WIN A PRIZE PACKAGE FROM AREA BUSINESS’. Find the 6 ads with the hidden Bluebird & Follow these instructions: Mail the names of the 6 business’ (Do NOT cut out ads)in which you found the Bluebird along with your name, address and phone # To: Parrish Publishing PO Box 681 Ozark, AL 36361 OR: Email to LaughsandLifts@live.com with subject line:

BLUEBIRD NO PHONE CALLS Drawing held on the 20th of the month

Every Problem is an opportunity to trust God!

Lady, this vacuum cleaner will cut your work in half. Good. I’ll take two of them. IN OUR 6TH YEAR, Laughs&Lifts is a FREE, full color, interactive, local publication that can be seen 365 days a year. It is published monthly and distributed anywhere consumers experience wait times; doctors’ offices, dentists’ offices, urgent cares, hotels, senior centers, clubs, car washes, and in many high traffic businesses like groceries and restaurants. The goal of Laughs&Lifts is to entertain and engage consumers. We strive to maximize enjoyment for our readers and maximum exposure for our advertisers. Laughs&Lifts is a cost effective, marketing tool for small business owners to effectively spend the dollars they have, in their target market where most businesses generate 80% of their customers. Laughs&Lifts is also an effective tool for businesses of all sizes, whether it is the only thing they do or whether it is just a supplement to their advertising program. Consumers spend an average of 45 minutes interacting with Laughs&Lifts while they are waiting and they almost always take it with them…and share it with a friend or relative. While Laughs&Lifts tries very hard to ensure the accuracy of the information in our clients advertisements and our publication in general, we are not responsible for vendor availability, typographic errors or omissions.

My friend told me he threw a stick 5 miles and his dog found it & brought it back! Sounds a bit far fetched to me.

Give a man a fish And he has food for a day.

Teach a man to fish and he has to buy bamboo rods, graphite reels, monofilament lines. neoprene waders, creels, lures, tackle boxes, flies, spinners, worm rigs, slip sinkers, hooks, gore-tex hats, 20 pocket vests, fish finders,depth sounders, radar, boats, motor, trailers, GPS’s, coolers, ice, ………

I’ve never seen a tombstone that read ”Died from not forwarding that email to 10 people.”

Laughs and Lifts Subscription

FLOORING

Great Gift for Soldiers, Prisoners, Your Pastor, Out of Area Friends or Yourself! $30 for 1 year (12 issues) $50 ($25 ea.) For 2 or more years Or 2 or more subscriptions Send name(s) address & check to Parrish Publishing P.O. Box 681 Ozark, Al 36361

When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem.

JUNE 2014 NOW IN OUR 6�� YEAR

Laughs

andLifts.com

I knew a man so clumsy, he could trip over a cordless phone.

AIR CONDITIONING

B U

RESIDENTIAL & COMMERCIAL….WE GET IT DONE!

S I N E

ANTIQUES

S S APPLIANCE REPAIR & SALES

AUTO/PARTS-REPAIR-SALES

Ozark Tire & service 774-1416

● New & Used Tires ● Oil Changes 453 South Union Ave. ● Road Side Service Ozark, AL AUTO/PARTS-REPAIR-SALES

WE BUY CARS 445-1460 AUTO/PARTS-REPAIR-SALES

Appliance Sales • Parts • Service 334-379-3135 697-B North Union Ave. • Ozark, AL. 32 Years Exp

abcapplianceozark.com

ARMY-NAVY STORE

DOTHAN ARMY - NAVY STORE R 1001 GENUINE ISSUE (GI) US MILITARY ITEMS WE SELL FOR LESS Please Check Us Out.

334-435-0796

Buy ~ Sell ~ Trade

Hwy 231 S. 9 Miles South of Ross Clark Circle at Mile Post 4

E AUTO/PARTS-REPAIR-SALES

ATTORNEY

JOE W. ADAMS Attorney at Law

Do you have a Will? You need one! Let me assist - 45 years experience

C T

1278 Andrews Avenue ~ Ozark, Alabama 774-5533 “No representation is made that the quality of the legal services to be performed is greater than the quality of legal services provided by other lawyers.”

Put Your Message In This Size Business Directory Ad For 4 Months For Only

$100

Laughs andLifts.com 28

JUNE 2014 NOW IN OUR 6�� YEAR

Jennifer Mcleod has FINANCING FOR EVERYONE § Everyone Approved § No Credit § Bad Credit

2618 US Highway 231 N. Ozark, AL

(334)774-0420 BUSINESS CARDS

1000 BUSINESS FREE SHIPPING CARDS Anywhere In USA $49 Roger Parrish • 334•379•7603 rogerparrish@live.com

When sign makers go on strike, is anything written on their signs?

I knew a man so lazy that he wouldn’t accept a job licking spoons at a pie factory.

CAMPGROUNDS

Fishing Charters, Cabins & Camping

2817 Indian Pass Road Port St. Joe, Florida 32456 850-227-7203 www.indianpasscamp.com

CLEANERS AND LAUNDRY

LOGAN’S M-F 6-5 Sat 6-12

774-8012

618 S. Union Ave. Ozark, Al.

DAYCARE CENTERS

No Job Too Small Licensed and Insured

Daycare & Learning Center

774-4447

1962 Skipperville Road Ozark, AL

ELECTRICIANS

Tyre Electrical & Plumbing “Specializing in Services Calls of All Types” 30 Years Experience! Licensed, Insured & Bonded

334.774.5194

334-774-2448 334-379-4831

zark, AL Street ~ O 673 James

HEALTH & FITNESS CLUB

334-774-1727 345 N. Merrick Ave. ~ Ozark

Cardio Area ~ 24/7 Access Free Weights & Weight Assisted Machines Personal Trainers ~ Tanning Beds ~ Sauna

Join Today! Feel Better & Look Better!

Noah’s Ark

CHRIS AND EDDIE ADKINS

VICE R E S N A M Y D N A H A A&

S I

DRY CLEANERS & LAUNDRY

HANDYMAN

INSURANCE Sammy Judah ~ Donna Shuman Call or visit us today!

ircle Insurance Agency 863 Andrews Ave. ~ Ozark, Al. 36360

334-774-7177

WE HAVE SAVED YOU A SPOT. D I

FLOORING

LLC

Wood ~ Ceramic ~ Carpet TILE SHOWER SPECIALIST

334-445-2866 936 Andrews Ave. • Ozark, AL 36360 HAIR SALON

E C T O

…

Put Your Message In This Size Business Directory Ad For 4 Months For Only

334-618-8341

$200

TOP DOLLAR PAID

Y Advice is what you ask when you already know the answer but wished you didn't

JUNE 2014 NOW IN OUR 6�� YEAR

Laughs

andLifts.com

Experience is always expensive. It is the only thing, which cannot be gained without paying the price.

Find The Differences Answers 1. DTZ sign is different 2. Windows on left are different 3. Pixels Sign is different 4. Trash receptacles are different 5. Man’s coat is different color 6. Cross on bldg. in center is missing 7. Box at trash receptacle on left is different size 8. One Entrance sign is missing 9. Flag is missing

LAWNMOWER REPAIR

D&D 231 LAWN MOWER REPAIR & PARTS 334-774-1226 Durwood & Diane Smith 4322 Hwy. 231 South Ozark, AL Just Past Mile Marker 40 Across Hwy. 231 from Grace Baptist Church

PROPANE OZARK

20 lb. Propane Cylinder Refill

Buy 5 - Get 1 FREE No other discounts apply - No partial fills

OZARK/FORT RUCKER KOA RV CAMPING • RV SUPPLIES • PROPANE FT RUCKER 2414 N. US Hwy 231 3.3 Miles N of McDonalds @ MM47

334-774-3219

B U

SEWING MACHINES SALES & SERVICE

DERRELL’S

SEWING & VACUUM CENTER

PARTS FOR ALL BRANDS OF SEWING MACHINES & VACUUM CLEANERS

2507 MONTGOMERY HWY. AZALEA PLAZA DOTHAN, AL

334-794-0824

SWIMMING POOLS

I N

POOL & SPA LLC

Let Sunshine Make Your Pool Sparkle! Chris Barranco 334-618-6310 or 334-618-5006

THRIFT STORES

Bill & Pats THRIFT STORE

S S

347 N. Merrick Ave. Ozark, AL 36360

ACCEPTING DONATIONS

Clothes, Furniture, Electronics, Glassware, Books, Tapes, Jewelry, etc.

FREE PICKUP

D 334-774-6954 I CALL

R E

Thanks for shopping with us. We really do appreciate your business.

TREE SERVICE

Do you need that tree cut or trimmed in your yard?

TREE SERVICES, FREE Estimates / Bonded & Insured

Shane Crooks

334-774-0794

ZOO

THIS SIZE AD ALPHABETIZED BY BUSINESS CATEGORIES 4 MONTHS FOR $200 Reg. Rate $60/Month Laughs andLifts.com 30

JUNE 2014 NOW IN OUR 6�� YEAR

C T

McClellands

O R

Banks, AL.

MikesZooCritters.com

Y 334-243-4039 Wed-Sun M & T by Appt. Is it possible to be totally partial?

Set Your Goals High Enough To Inspire You And Low Enough To Encourage You.

NOW IN

50 TROY LOCATIONS

Laughs and Lifts Family Magazine Troy Businesses call Keith Blankenship 334-403-2790 To Advertise Your Business or for Distribution Locations

have a friend who filled his car with gas at a self-service gas station. After he had paid and driven away, he realized that he had left the gas cap on top of his car. He stopped and looked and, sure enough, it was lost. Well, he thought for a second and realized that other people must have done the same thing, and that it was worth going back to look by the side of the road since even if he couldn't find his own gas cap, he might be able to find one that fit. Sure enough, he hadn't been searching long when he found a gas cap. He tried it on, and it went into place with a satisfying click. "Great," he thought, "I lost my gas cap, but I found another one that fits. And this one's even better because it locks..." (I hope he also found the key!)

“Willpower” is nothing more than desire.

LaughsandLifts

Family Magazine is the most unique magazine around… providing laughter in clean jokes & cartoons, & encouragement through uplifting articles based firmly in God’s Word, plus Crosswords, Sudoku, Recipes, Puzzles & More A one of a kind advertising venue for your business!

Laughs&Lifts Troy advertisers call 334-403-2790 All Other areas call 334-379-7603 JUNE 2014 NOW IN OUR 6�� YEAR

Laughs

andLifts.com

KATE TAYLOR REALTY

See These Homes and all our listing at www.TaylorRealtyOnline.com

106 South Main Street • Brundidge, Alabama 334-735-9500 • 1-800-735-3395

405 North Main Street, Brundidge was the Gulf Service Station that many of us has used to have our autos filled up or air put in the tires. But, it's ready for a new adventure. So, could it be a bake shop, gift shop,coffee shop, barber shop, beauty shop, office or computer lab, or anything else that you might decide it could be. It can be yours for $89,900 CALL Kate Today!.

415 North Main St., Brundidge is a good auto parts business. The owner is ready to retire so he is put this business on the market at a Cash Price of only $159,000. The only thing that will need to be changed is the name. The building & inventory is all included. It is a well known business with regular customers. Remember that price(Cash)Only $159,000.

Call Kate Today!

SNELL FARMS Naturally Grown Produce

FRESH FROM OUR FARM Peas & Butterbeans Available NOW Place your Orders Now For

Peppers, Tomatoes, Sweet Potatoes, Okra, Sweet Corn, Squash, Cucumbers and Specialty Crops, Green Peanuts, Watermelons

Earl Snell 334-733-6490 or Charisse Snell 334-733-6489 MC/VISA FOODSTAMP FMNP CHECKS ACCEPTED JUNE 2014 Laughs 6928 County Road 33OUR~6��Skipperville, AL 36374 snellfarms33@gmail.com NOW IN YEAR andLifts.com 32